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thatmultifandomhoe · 3 years

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Knitting You a Home - 6

Pairing: Wolf Hybrid Namjoon and Human Reader

Word Count: 1,551

Genre/Rating: Hybrid AU - Established Relationship - Angst - Fluff - Smut - PG-13

Overview: Things have changed for you and Namjoon. It’s been a year since the two of you got together, and despite a rocky start, it was impossible to deny the bond and love you shared for each other. But ever since Hoseok had been separated from his Mate, Namjoon has been withdrawing himself from you and doesn’t come home until late at night.

With questions far larger than either of you imagined, you can’t help but wonder if he’s let his past and old fears come back to haunt him. You had shown him that it was possible to have a home and be loved once before, but will you be able to do it again?

Warning: None.

Playlist:

Main Master List:

Knitting You a Home Master List:

Mated Love is Never Easy Series Master List:

Sneak Peak - Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5 - Part 6 - Part 7 - Part 8 - Part 9 - Part 10 - Part 11 - Part 12 - Part 13 - Part 14 - Part 15 - ?

©thatmultifandomhoe Do not repost, translate, or use my stories without permission.

Tugging on his baseball cap, Namjoon pulled out the folded-up flyer once again, making sure he had the right address. The overhead purple neon light flickered once but continued to light up the dark as packs of people entered and left Lotus at the same time.

He was tucking the paper into his back pocket when he suddenly heard laughter. Looking up only to see a woman with both her arms around two friends who were laughing just as hard. Their smiles were contagious and for a moment, Namjoon felt himself smiling, wondering when the last time he had felt that relaxed was.

After meeting you, his life had fallen into a familiar routine. It was exactly what he needed and he loved it, but sometimes he found himself wanting to do the unexpected, to just go with no real plan or idea and stumble upon something different.

Which was why he was walking through Lotus, the most popular night club in town. Eyes adjusting to the sudden darkness, strobe lights bounced around the room as the bass thumped out of the speakers. Sweat and liquor hung in the air but nobody appeared to give a damn. The other Hybrids that Namjoon spotted as he made his way to the bar were either used to the sounds and smells, or they were too drunk to care.

Before Namjoon reached the bar, he managed to stumble his way over to the restrooms to catch his breath. It wasn’t as crowded as the dance floor, allowing him to relax his tail. He was looking around the club, watching the bartenders toss glass bottles and shake up mixed drinks, one even filling about seven shot glasses with amber liquid in a straight line at once.

Out of the corner of his eye a door opened, a man stumbling back to the bar with a shit eating grin and he thought nothing of it. But when the door didn’t close right away, Namjoon’s ear twitched in its direction, hearing different music coming from there than what was being played in the club.

It was faint, but in seconds he was able to detect the rap music coming from behind the door underneath the sound of EDM.

The flyer suddenly felt heavy in his pocket, and as he pulled it out once more, the paper clenched in his grip. Behind that door was where he wanted to be.

Not thinking twice, Namjoon opened the door to find a hallway leading to a staircase that went down. The rap music grew louder as he walked down the stairs, his heart beating in unison as his steps were drowned out. Following the music, the stairs only went down one floor before breaking out into another hallway, and halfway down there was a door that at the moment, was open, allowing red light to stream out into the grey hallway.

There wasn’t anyone guarding the entrance like he thought, and nobody stopped him when he walked through the door. Instantly he was transported to another place, one that he hadn’t expected to exist underneath Lotus.

The room opened up into a large underground basement, cinder-block walls encasing the several hundred people that were occupying the space. Red strobe lights danced around and in the middle of the room was a large stage that was being used. Only there were regular white spot lights being used to highlight the stars of the show. Amps were set at the sides of the stage, but with music seeming to be coming from everywhere, Namjoon assumed they had installed several in the ceilings or on the walls.

Up on the stage were two groups. On the left side were a group of nine men, and on the right was a group of about thirteen who were currently dancing. The crowd screamed as one of the dancers flipped, twisting his body and spinning around on his shoulders.

Namjoon smiled as he walked further into the room, not quite entering the crowd but absorbing everything that he saw. Despite the numerous strobe lights, he had to take out his cellphone and hold it above the flyer. He didn’t recall there being dance battles advertised as well.

“Hey newbie!” a voice suddenly called out.

Startled, Namjoon looked around him, wondering if he had misheard or if they were looking for someone else. But he was off to the side with no one else around him, and the blond-haired man was coming straight towards him. Namjoon straightened up, watching as he came closer. The stranger was wearing a black tank top that showed off his muscular arms while piercings decorated his ears.

He nodded towards Namjoon’s phone, gesturing with his hand across his neck. “If you’re gonna be down here, first thing you need to know is to kill the light.”

“Sorry,” Namjoon murmured, double tapping the screen.

The stranger grinned though, coming to a stop once they were close enough to hear each other without straining their voices to shout. “It’s alright. Boss prefers there to be no phones so none of the artist get caught.”

“But they’ll hang up flyers at recording studios?” Namjoon asked, raising an eyebrow in curiosity.

“Studios are always looking for new talent,” he pointed out. “They’re willing to look the other way. Officers however, would love to break this up. I’m Jackson by the way. What’s your name?” Jackson held out his hand, waiting for Namjoon to shake it.

“Namjoon.”

“Well, Namjoon, how the hell did you find the Underground?”

The flyer was still in his hand, so instead of answering, Namjoon simply held it up. Jackson shook his head, glancing at the stage before looking over his shoulder. Following his gaze, Namjoon spotted a lounge area that was further away from the stage.

“Come on,” Jackson called out. “Let’s go over there and talk. It’ll be easier than over here.”

Without waiting, Jackson headed over to the lounge, leaving Namjoon no choice but to follow after him. There wasn’t anyone else when he joined Jackson, but empty glasses littered the large square table as well as crumbs.

It wasn’t as loud this far away from the main attractions, and he was still able to see the performance going on. “I thought this was for rap battles?” He asked Jackson, finally tearing his eyes away from the dancers.

Jackson nodded, sinking into the black leather couch. “It is. We have a high demand for rap and dance battles, but not everyone does both. So, we alternate between the two. This just happens to be our dance battle night; come back tomorrow night and you’ll see the rappers go at it.”

Pressing his lips together, Namjoon joined Jackson, taking a moment to take it all in. He was finally here, and he had come on the wrong night. This was just his luck.

“You wanted rap night I take it?”

“Yeah, but it’s alright.” Shrugging, Namjoon leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees to watch the stage, smiling when the whole group got involved this time.

Raising an eyebrow, Jackson gave Namjoon a once over. He wasn’t dressed as if he was going to participate in either battle, and he didn’t look as if he came here to get his party on. All he wore was jeans, a green shirt, denim jacket and a baseball cap. Instead, he looked like he was about ready to go home. Like this was the last place that he belonged.

However, his eyes honed in on the square outline in one of the pockets of his jacket. Jackson had been around artists long enough to have an idea of what it was. “What’s with the notebook?” He asked, curiosity getting the better of him.

Namjoon patted his side, relieved to feel that it was still there. “I work at the recording studio,” he explained, taking his notebook out of his pocket. “I saw the flyer a couple nights ago and finally decided to check it out.”

“What do you think so far?” Jackson stared at the notebook, spotting the worn-out corners on the cover. As Namjoon absentmindedly flipped through it, the black ink in his sprawled-out handwriting became visible for a brief second before disappearing again.

The Hybrid couldn’t take his eyes off the stage though. As he inhaled, he was able to make out the faint distinguish scent that Jackson was human and friendly, a note that he mentally marked up in his mind. For some reason, like he felt with you, he knew he’d be able to trust Jackson.

For years he had been working on his own music project, and Yoongi - who had spent as much time helping Namjoon out and listening to it – had even encouraged Namjoon to finally put it out there. It was ready for the world to listen to, but he kept holding back. He needed to see if people would actually give a damn about what he wanted to say, to know if they were able to look beyond the tail and ears, and see him as himself. As a serious artist. Pointing at the stage, he turned to look at Jackson over his shoulder, a wolfish grin appearing on his features as he held up his notebook.

“I want to get on that stage.”

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prettyboongi · 4 years

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BTS Reaction | You React to Them Calling You Ugly [Part 1: The Hyung Line]

[A/N: When I first got this request, I knew it was going to be a challenge. Not only the title alone is super angst-ridden, this reaction is pretty much a reversal of what I usually do. Instead of them reacting to you, it’s the other way around. However, I was only able to finish the hyung line parts at the moment. But I will finish part 2 as soon as possible! Hope you guys enjoy!]

Seokjin

“Hey, Jin, am I ugly?”

Your unexpected question catches your friend off guard. He looks up from his phone screen, catching the serious expression on your face.

“That’s a random question,” he says with a light laugh, “What brought this up?”

You look down at your coffee mug and sighed. “Well, the other day I was out with my little sisters at the mall, buying clothes and shit. We were only there for 2 hours and seven guys came up to us and started hitting on them. Just them though. I was completely left out in the dark. It was so embarrassing.” As far as you can remember, you’ve always felt ugly. Throughout the years, there was always someone pointing an imperfection of yours, whether it was your skin, hair or body shape. It definitely didn’t help having gorgeous sisters or even a friend as good looking as Jin.

Jin looks at you sentimentally. “I’m sorry that happened, Y/N.”

But you shook your head in response. “You never answered my question. Do you think I’m ugly?”

“Why does it matter what I think of you? You’re obviously an amazing person, Y/N.

“Just answer the question?”

“Y/N-”

“Jin,” your voice sounded desperate as you looked up at your friend pleading eyes, "Please tell me."

Jin quietly sighs as he puts down his phone on your kitchen counter. “If I had to be perfectly honest, Y/N, you could look much prettier if you actually took care of your appearance.”

“So you think I am ugly.”

“I never used that word.”

“You didn’t have to,” you said quietly. Feeling your eyes burn with incoming tears, you turned your back on Jin. “But thanks for being honest.”

Jin felt absolutely terrible. As your best friend, he always made sure to be honest with you, and with his blunt nature, it was never an issue for him. But for the first time in your friendship, he sees that he shouldn’t be this honest.

After a moment of uncomfortable silence, you hear Jin scoot from his chair and gather his things. “Hey, I have to run somewhere. See you later.”

The moment you hear the door close behind him, that’s when you let you collapse onto the floor, quietly sobbing to yourself.

Yoongi

You honestly couldn’t understand why a person like Min Yoongi would ever be into you. Not only was he an amazingly talented rapper and producer, he’s also one of the most attractive men you’ve ever laid eyes on. That when he asked you out, you thought he was either pulling a cruel prank on you or he was some powerful drugs. I mean, how could you believe that he actually liked you. But after some persistence on his end, you decided to stuff down your insecurities and took a chance with love.

Almost a month of dating, you have no regrets when it comes to Yoongi. He was nothing but a perfect gentleman and, most importantly, a perfect boyfriend. He loved everything about you, everything from your warm smile to your dry sense of humor. The only thing he didn’t like about you was your self-hatred and how you’re always quick to put yourself down.

“I really wished you loved yourself better, Y/N,” said Yoongi.

“Easier said than done,” you replied, laughing at his comment as if it was a funny joke.

Despite how you felt about yourself, Yoongi thought you were beautiful, inside and out. Everyday he fell more and more in love with you and you felt the same for him.

However, when he told you he wanted to introduce you to his friends, that’s when you broke out of your blissful reverie. At first, you vehemently refused, saying that it was way too soon and that you were too shy. But he didn’t buy it.

“Come on, Y/N. What’s the worst that could happen?,” he asked.

You didn’t want to entertain his question with an answer but you did eventually break down and agreed to meet his friends. Knowing how sweet and mature Yoongi is, his friends would have to be the same way. Right?

The plan was to meet up Friday night at the guys favorite bar downtown. Hours before the supposed rendezvous, you spent your time meticulously getting ready. Everything was picked out with the utmost care: your hairstyle, your outfit, your makeup. Of course Yoongi thought your prep was unnecessary but you wanted to make a great impression on his friends. Even if it was unnecessary, at least the effort you’ve put on your appearance boosted your confidence a bit.

As you and Yoongi walk into the busy and warmly lit bar, you instantly hear a sharp shout from the other end of the establishment.

“Yoongi! Over here!”

Nervous, you grabbed Yoongi’s hand before heading over to the booth the six men occupied.

“Boys, this is Y/N,” he introduced you. “Please make her feel welcome.”

You were so nervous you could only smile pleasantly and give a small wave. But deter the boys from warmly welcoming you. After scooting over to make room for you and Yoongi, the boys joked around with you, told embarrassing stories about Yoongi and overall just made you feel a part of the gang. It was safe to say that things were going great that night.

It wasn’t until you were heading towards the restroom at the back of the bar when you spotted Yoongi’s youngest friend Jungkook. He had excused himself moments earlier to answer a phone call. You were planning on sneaking past him in order to not disturb his call when you mentioned your name.

“Her name is Y/N? Yeah I guess her name is kinda pretty. Too bad she looks fucking busted!,” he laughs into his phone. “Trust me, I’m not exaggerating. You think Yoongi-hyung would have taste in women but I guess not.”

Listening to Jungkook, you felt your heart break into a million pieces as the intense feelings of shame heated your face. You quickly walked back to the table and pulled Yoongi aside.

“What’s wrong?,” he asked, “You look like you're about to cry.”

“I need to go home, Yoongi. I feel I’m on the verge of a panic attack,” you half-lied to him. You tried your best to hold in your tears but the first sob that escaped your mouth ruined it for you.

Yoongi thought you were having a fun night but he did know you get panicky sometimes. He told you to head to the car while he said his goodbyes.

You worked so hard to get ready for this night and it took one nasty comment to send you crashing down.

Hoseok

“Thanks for inviting me,” you say as you walked into Hoseok’s apartment.

“No thank you for coming,” he replies with a cheery smile on his face. After helping you take off your coat, he leads you to his living room sofa.

You couldn’t believe it when your longtime crush Hoseok began talking to you. To be honest, you were more than content dreamily gazing at him whenever you caught him around campus. But when one day he asked to sit next with you at the university’s cafe, it was practically a dream come true!

For the next two weeks, the two of you kept up a flirty banter, both on campus and through texting. Having the campus hottie showing an interest you wouldn’t have thought things would get better for you. Well imagine your shock when Hoseok invited you to come hang out at his place.

Once he sat next to you on the sofa, he put his arm around you and brought you closer to him.

“What would you like to watch,” he asked you as he turned on the Netflix app on his TV.

You nervously giggled. “Oh I dunno, it’s up to you, Hobi.”

The two of you ended up settling for an indie romance film. However you two weren’t so invested in it. Especially after you started to feel Hoseok glide his hands on the soft curves of your body and felt his soft lips on your neck. One thing led to another and… let’s just say you two were emphasizing on the “Chill” part of “Netflix and Chill.”

By the time your heavy romp was over, Hoseok excused himself to the bathroom while you stayed on the sofa, basking in sheer ecstasy. The silence of the living room suddenly broke when you heard the vibration of Hobi’s phone against the coffee table. Feeling a bit nosy, you decided to pick up his phone to see what notification he received. However, your thumb accidentally slid across the phone screen and it opened to his messaging app. You knew snooping on someone’s phone was not only a bad idea, but a total invasion of privacy. But you were too noisy for your own good.

The screen was already opened on Hoseok’s conversation with his best friend, Jimin. You read their most recent texts, then instantly regretted it.

Jimin: Y/N? The same Y/N you’ve been hanging out with lately

Hobi: Yeah that Y/N

Jimin: But why? Didn’t you say she was ugly as fuck?

Hobi: Don’t recall using those words… but i would be quick to call her cute or anything

Jimin: Okay so why her tho

Hobi: Well she seemed desperate enough to fool around with so I thought ‘why not’?

Jimin: Dude

You were so dumbstrucked of what you’ve just read that you didn’t hear Hoseok’s approaching footsteps.

“What’re you doing…,” he begins as he sees you with his phone in your hands, screen opened to his texts. “What the fuck, Y/N?!” He tried to grab the phone from your hands before you threw hard at his chest.

“You fucking asshole!!,” you cried. You actually thought someone as handsome as Hoseok genuinely liked you. But sadly you were dead wrong.

He ended up kicking you out of his apartment but you didn’t care, you wanted to get out there. To get away from him. After getting into your car, you drove to the nearest parking lot you could find and sat there in the silence. And wept.

Namjoon

Weddings were never your thing. For as long as you can remember, you were always dragged to go to someone's wedding. It started with relatives, then your older siblings, and now, as an adult, your friends. Everyone excused your hatred for weddings as you being a curmudgeon. But the real reason you weren’t a fan of them was that deep inside you knew you that no one would ever make you their bride. You were never going to wear a gorgeous yet outrageously expensive wedding gown. And most of all, you were never going to find a groom who will look at you lovingly while saying his vows before grabbing you for a passionate. But that’s life right?

You have gotten to a point where you swore off weddings because you just couldn’t bear them anymore. But your best friend since childhood just had to get engaged and made you her maid of honor. You loved her so much and wished for her happiness above yours so you decided to bear and grin through it. But this is the last one, you swore to yourself.

Fast forward to three months into the engagement, it was the night of the engagement party. You and the rest of the bridesmaids were set to meet the groomsmen. The men were pretty normal, none of them really catching your eye. And then you were introduced to the best man, Kim Namjoon, and it was pretty much love at first sight. He was smart, funny and extremely handsome- saying that he was the perfect man would’ve been a complete understatement. And to your luck, he was incredibly kind to you and wanted to work side by side in this engagement. He gave you his contact information and social media, assuring you you can reach him anytime. And you did. Not only did you message him about the wedding, it soon evolved into friendly conversations about each other’s lives. In one of these conversations, you found that he was single and that he wasn’t planning on taking a date to the big day. Obviously, you didn’t have the balls to ask Namjoon out right then and there. But it did give you the incentive to wow him at the wedding. It was definitely something to look forward to.

Fast Forward to the actual day of the wedding. For once, you actually put effort into your wedding appearance. You made sure you were beautifully glammed up, hoping to make Namjoon fall in love with you. During the reception, you even told some of the bridesmaids your plan, and they helped gas you up and gave you supportive platitudes. With their support and a few glasses of champagne, you were ready to ask Namjoon to dance.

Walking up to the bar where he was sitting, your best friend stops you.

“Hey, I was actually about to talk to Namjoon-”

“I know what you're about to do, one of the bridesmaids told me,” she interrupted. “Trust me, it’s not a good idea.” You were confused by her words, wondering why would stop you from finally giving love a chance. That’s when she pulled you aside and told you the truth. “He’s not a good guy, Y/N. He’s been making disgusting and hurtful comments about the bridesmaids and you especially. When he said that you weren’t “too ugly to fool around in the broom closet, but not hot enough for a one stand, I had to possess every power in me to not knock his lights out.”

You just stood there, silently nodding and taking in her words. You put on a brave face but it was clear that your heart was broken into a million pieces.

Your best friend pulled you into a tight hug. “Forget about that dumbass, you’re absolutely stunning. Just stick with me for the rest of the evening, okay?”

“Okay,” the only thing you could reply with.

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morningfears · 4 years

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DIY Romance

Rating: PG

Summary: “Am I your lock screen? That’s so cute.” “...you weren’t supposed to see that.” For @marvelsperalta. Ft. YouTuber!Reader and YouTuber!Cal that no one asked for but I’m sort of obsessed with. And pining best friends to lovers! (Also, I haven’t written anything in months pls don’t judge me I’m rusty thx)

Word Count: 1.6k

“Hey, guys! Welcome back to my channel, I hope you’re all having an amazing day! Today’s video is going to be super fun because Calum, my best friend and nine-tenths of my impulse control, is joining me.”

Calum knows that he should glance at the camera as you introduce him, knows that you’ll playfully scold him later as you edit the footage, but he keeps his gaze firmly on you as you smile brightly at the camera. He’s got a small smile of his own, his lips tilted up at the corner, and pink tinged cheeks as you gesture at the table full of craft supplies in front of you both.

“We’re going to be attempting to follow some really interesting holiday crafts, some edible and some not, here on my channel. Notice how I said attempting, by the way. Last year’s holiday video turned into a dumpster fire so quickly so… Hopefully this year will be different! On Calum’s channel, you’re going to get to see me epically fail at learning how to play a few of our favorite holiday pop punk songs on the bass!”

Calum laughs at this as he recalls the last time he attempted to teach you how to play a song on bass. For someone who knew how to play piano and was fairly good at picking up new skills, he remembered thinking that you were hopeless. However, that didn’t stop him from attempting to teach you new songs as it always gave him an excuse to sit just a little closer, his knees touching yours and his fingers brushing over the back of your hand as he attempted to show you the right chord.

“I’ll leave a link to Cal’s channel in the box below, along with his Insta handle because I always get a million comments asking for it because apparently you all have a crush on Cal.”

“I mean, who wouldn’t?” Calum questions, his voice dropping into an over exaggerated caricature of confidence as he winks at the camera. You turn to stare at him for a moment, eyebrows raised but face otherwise void of emotion, before you both giggle at his behavior.

“This is why I don’t let you participate in my videos more than once a year,” you tease with a laugh as Calum nudges your side and you attempt to keep the goofy smile that your subscribers mercilessly point out any time Calum appears on your channel (or on your Instagram) off your face.

You know that it’s cliche, you’ve told yourself that time and time again (and your friends, any time they ask about what’s really going on between you and Calum), but you couldn’t help falling for your best friend. It wasn’t love at first sight, contrary to what everyone seemed to think, but you’ve found that Calum is the kind of person that almost worms his way into your heart. He’s thoughtful and kind, funny and charming, talented and hardworking, and, as if his heart wasn’t already the most beautiful thing you’d ever seen, his physical appearance (no matter how drastically he changed his hair or his wardrobe) was just as beautiful.

You sometimes hate that you fell so hard for someone you consider your closest friend. However, when he moves just a little closer as you reach for the basket containing the items you need for your first holiday craft, you can’t help but think about the little moments that make you think your feelings might not be one-sided.

Any time there’s a movie night at Luke’s, any time there’s a dinner at Ashton’s, any time there’s a game night at Michael’s; Calum is always by your side. He somehow always manages to claim the seat to your left, his hand on your knee or his arm around your shoulders. He somehow always manages to capture your attention, regardless of how interested you are in the movie or the food or the game at hand. He always manages to be the center of your world, no matter how many people are around, and even managed to keep your attention in the presence of your (at one time) crush.

You sometimes wonder if it’s just him being friendly, if he’s only treating you this way because he’s comfortable around you, or if he’s really interested.

However, before you can think too much about it, yet again, you push the thought to the back of your mind and return to the craft at hand.

“So, up first,” you hum as you begin pulling the ingredients you’ll need for a homemade sugar cookie out of the small red basket, “sugar cookies! We’re going to make some and then decorate them with a few cool hacks I found on Pinterest. We all know that Pinterest hasn’t been my best friend in recent years so let’s hope that these turn out as nice as they looked online.”

Calum is one of your most competent friends in the kitchen. He knows his way around, even if he isn’t the most confident chef there is, and manages to help you get the dough ready to cut into shapes. As you roll it out, flour on your hands and covering your kitchen counter, your cell phone dings and you huff an annoyed breath.

“No one ever wants to talk to me unless I’m filming,” you laugh as you glance at the camera. “Cal, can you silence that for me, please?” you question as you nod at your flour-covered fingers.

“‘Course,” he hums as he reaches for the device. The moment he picks it up from the counter, it goes off again but you pay it no mind as you focus on getting the dough just right. However, after a moment of silence, you glance up to find Calum grinning at your lock screen.

“What?” you question, a frown on your lips as pause and raise an eyebrow at him.

“Am I your lock screen?” he asks as he clears the notifications and turns the device toward the camera. “That’s so cute!”

“…you weren’t supposed to see that,” you mumble as you glance at the picture of the two of you that you’d set as your lock screen a few weeks prior. It’s a picture that Luke had taken of the two of you, sitting on his couch. Calum is holding a bowl of popcorn above his head, grinning as you attempt to reach for it. It looks like something out of a cheesy film, some ridiculous photo of two idiots in love, and you loved the photo more than you cared to admit.

It made you feel like there was something there, that you weren’t totally crazy for believing there could be more to you and Calum some day, but you never wanted him to see it. It isn’t weird, not really, but it’s also not completely normal, either. It’s a strange limbo area that you’re not sure how to deal with and you almost reach out for the device, flour hands be damned.

“It really is cute,” Calum hums, his smile blinding as he glances up at you. “Fitting, I guess, ‘cause mine’s of the two of us, too.”

“Wait, really?” you ask, your lips parting in surprise as he fishes his own phone out of his pocket and clicks the home button. As the screen wakes, you catch sight of the two of you, sitting in Ashton’s backyard under the fairy lights his girlfriend had strung around the area to keep everything bright. It’s a picture that you didn’t know existed, one you’d never seen before, and you can’t help but smile at it. “That’s such a good picture,” you mumble before you tear your eyes away from it and glance up at Calum. “When was that taken?”

“Few months ago,” he shrugs as he shoves the device back into his pocket. “Ash took it. He said he was sure we’d want it later. He wasn’t wrong.” When you blink in confusion, Calum steps a little closer to you. “I might’ve read this wrong, might’ve read everything wrong, but I like to think that I haven’t. I’d like to think that you feel for me what I feel for you.”

“And what do you feel for me?” you ask, even though you’re half certain you already know the answer.

“I’m into you,” Calum offers, his voice going quiet as he glances down at the floor. “I have been for a while but I’ve just been too afraid to make a move. A real one, anyway. But I’m tired of hinting and hoping.”

“I feel the same,” you nod, a small smile on your lips as you wait for him to lift his gaze from the floor to your eyes. “I’m into you, too. And I’m glad that you made the first move because we both know I would’ve overthought it to the point of nothing actually happening.”

Calum laughs at this, nodding as he considers just how true that statement likely is, and grins at you. “Does this mean that you’ll let me take you on a date tonight instead of us hanging out at Luke’s, watching movies with our friends?”

“Absolutely,” you nod, your grin matching his as you reach for a towel to wipe your hands. “I don’t think I could think of a better way to spend tonight than by having date night with you.”

The pair of you stand there for a moment, grins stretching your lips and nothing else seeming to exist, and Calum moves as if he plans to kiss you when the beeping of your camera battery pulls you from your fantasy. You blink, mildly disoriented, and laugh as you realize that you’d filmed the whole thing. “I don’t think that’s going to make it into the final video,” you hum as you reach to turn off your camera for a moment, “but I don’t think I’m too upset about having that footage.”

_______________________________________________________________________

Author’s Note: I haven’t written in months, help. I don’t know why I’m so obsessed with this AU it’s just fun. Okay, I’m tired. I’m gonna go watch more YouTube. No, I don’t have a problem. Goodbye.

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incantavaxx · 4 years

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Episode 10

(I fell asleep yesterday so now I can say that I didn’t watch the entire season in a day, my dignity is saved.)

- YES LET’S KEEP DRAGGING CANEPALLO TO THE GROUND, it’s what he deserves. Also how adorable is it that Nicholas is actually super talented in real life too and he has an instagram page for his drawings?

SEE? I knew there was a reason for the cat thing, fuck Raffaele (who is coincidentally my ex’s name too). And omg her father just called her FAT I can’t, I’m so glad she has Luchino they’re so cute Silvia season when.

- I waited ALL MY LIFE for a Giovanni Garau Wizard of Love clip and they’re really gonna fucking ruin it with EMMA COVITTI THE VILLAIN and MORE ELIA/SANA BULLSHIT, is this happening??? BESSE WHAT DID I EVER DO TO YOU I DID NOTHING BUT LOVE AND SUPPORT YOU WHY DO YOU HATE M- I TAKE IT BACK, BESSE YOU NEVER DID ANYTHING WRONG, EVER, THIS IS THE BEST CLIP EVER- “canecazzo”, CANECAZZO, everyone has been slandering his name this entire season and no one but HIM could finally reach the final superior level, Federico CANECAZZO. Poetic. Cinema.

Marti SHUT UP, we do not recall the good things that Canecazzo did, we HATE him this season, also he was only good because Rich King Incanti was there to lead the way (the way towards the chair), now that he’s alone he showed his true colors.

“It’s two years that I wait, get in line.” YOU TELL HIM GIO YOU TELL HIM. AND LET’S BE CLEAR MISTER CANECAZZO, WHEN YOU’RE IN LINE AFTER GIOVANNI GARAU IT MEANS THAT YOUR TURN IS NOT COMING IN THIS LIFE.

Thank you Besse for this, in OG Jonas eventually helps Chris but the Wizard of Love is superior and doesn’t stand for that type of shit.

- IT WAS DOCTOR SPERA ALL ALONG, HE MADE HER DO IT AND HE WON A WINE KSKSK I’m so emotional seeing NAMACISSI behind him btw.

- I started hearing “Elettra, Elettra Lamborghini” before the POV changed and I wonder for a second who it was going to be and OF COURSE IT’S FILIPPO SAVA WITH ELETTRA LAMBORHINI, who else could it be, iconic. “What do you know what Edo does when you’re not there?” No we all know Filo, he cries in the shower and dresses all emo until Ele comes back, that’s it. My babies, I miss them so much, who would have thought that the real heartbreaking long distance relationship would have been the one between brother and sister here.

- Is it normal that I cried reading NICCOLÒ on the screen, yes? Just asking. “I’m just sad you don’t like the sweater I gave you.” “I didn’t say I didn’t like it, I said it’s…peculiar.” Marti is such a little shit omg I need to see the sweater. FUCKING FISHERMAN COME HERE IF YOU HAVE THE GUT COME HERE AND SEE HOW MANY SLAPS I HAVE LEFT, I’LL SLAP YOU WITH YOUR OWN FISHES YOU SUCKER-so sweet how Nicco is able to calm Marti down BUT MARTI MY CHILD DOGE NICCO AND SPRINT TOWARDS THE FISHERMAN GO GO GO DESTROY HIM-In other words, I am not the one friend you want at your side to keep you calm and avoid a fight.

- I’m forever thankful to Besse for saying “a clip for Canecazzo? Not on my watch” but I’m also incredibly PISSED that he gave it to Luchino not because I don’t love Luchino with all my heart but because they could have just done it with Silvia’s clip since they were together and give Canecazzo clip to someone ELSE that we actually NEVER see NEVER-you all know where I’m going with this I won’t even say, just know that my most chaotic disaster son deserves better.

- Fede, do not apologize to them, do not approach, do not befriend them, HEADBUT THEM. (I’m not the forviging type)

- I SCREAMED I KEEP SCREAMING I HAD TO PAUSE AND TEXT MY FRIEND TO SCREAM SOME MORE ELIA AND FILIPPO ARE MOVING IN TOGETHER I REPEAT ELIA AND FILIPPO ARE MOVING IN TOGETHER CAN YOU IMAGINE THE CHAOS THAT HOUSE WILL BE, CAN YOU IMAGINE SEASON 5 ELIA LIVING WITH FILIPPO, I-

-But seriously how do we go from crack ship that never ever ever interacted, to crack ship that never ever interacted but in which one said that would fuck the other one immediately, to THEY’RE MOVING IN TOGETHER BESSE REALLY SAID LET’S GIVE THE FANDOM EVERYTHING THEY WANT

- He literally knew we were going to hate him so much for the Sana/Elia thing and made us suffer the entire season just to HIT us at the end he’s so mean I love him

- AND FILIPPO EVEN HIT ON HIM AND ELIA GIGGLED ALL FLATTERED NETFLIX I HOPE YOU’RE ALREADY KNOCKING ON MISS ANDEM’S DOOR WITH YOUR ELIPPO SEASON 5

- ALSO CAN WE TALK ABOUT HOW RAMI IS ABOUT TO ENTER THE ROOM, THEN STOP, SEES THAT ELIA AND FILIPPO ARE TALKING AND IMMEDIATELY WALKS AWAY NOT TO INTERRUPT THIS LEGENDARY MOMENT, HE KNOWS

- Also Elia mentions wanting to go away from his father and like?? Did Besse read all the fanfictions? Is this what Netflix wanted the fanfiction for?

- Anyway I would like to thank not only God but also Ludovico Bessegato

- I TAKE IT BACK IMMEDIATELY WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU, WHY WOULD YOU GIVE ELIA A CLIP AND PUT EMMA COVITTI IN IT, WHAT ARE YOU SUGGESTING BESSE, STOP, THANK GOD GIO FOR AT LEAST TRYING TO STOP THE MADNESS BUT WHEN A MAD MEN LIKE BESSE HATES A FANDOM LIKE HE HATES US NOT EVEN THE WIZARD OF LOVE CAN STOP IT.

- Also, even putting my Elippo feelings aside, what kind of bullshit is that anyway? Can Elia be an actual human being with a brain or does he have to just immediately pursues every single girl, like he was watching Sana two seconds before and now he’s all over Covitti, like Besse what the fuck leave him alone.

- (I’m telling you, if you plan on making Elia/Covitti a thing in a possible season 5 YOU CAN KEEP IT)

- I’m so pissed, where is Rich King Incanti, only he can calm me down.

- KIDDING GIOEVA ENDGAME WORKS JUST AS FINE KSKSKS

“Without me and you, there would have never been that group of people that slowly created around us” This is Besse saying Gio and Eva started the cycle and Gio and Eva end it DO YOU HEAR ME CRYING.

Things Besse will be sued for: no Edoardo Incanti clip (like???? Why??? He was there anyway at the end, couldn’t they just film something quick???), Elia and Covitti clip existing (at least they didn’t kiss and she was NOT in the last scene so that means that nothing happened thank you very much), they didn’t make Sana sing (WHAT WAS THAT IN BESSE IG STORIES WHERE BEA WAS SINGING IMAGINE, DOES HE JUST LIKE TO TEASE US??? She sings all the time on her IG and she has a beautiful voice, why didn’t they do the karaoke scene with her???).

Things Besse will not be sued for: Gio delivering the speech at the end with the scenes of all of them together making me cry like a baby and literally every single thing in this season.

Now: SEASON 5 WHEN.

#skam italia #skam italia spoilers

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surveys-at-your-service · 3 years

Text

Survey #309

“show me how to lie - you’re getting better all the time / and turning all against one is an art that’s hard to teach.”

Have you ever played Jackbox Games? If so, which ones of their party games are your favorites? No, but I looooove watching Mark and The Boys play them on charity streams. They can make up the funniest shit. I can't recall the name of the specific one I'm thinking of... but I enjoy watching most of them. I do think one or two are boring, though. Do you have artistic friends? If so, have you got their artwork displayed? I have some very talented friends, but I don't have anything of theirs displayed somewhere. Have you ever considered pole dancing? Why/why not? No. It takes an incredible amount of strength, plus confidence I don't have. That and I'm just not into it. What's the last thing you fixed yourself? Uhhhhhhh bitch I couldn't tell ya. Are there any CDs you've held onto for sentimental reasons? No. Did you read the Barbie magazines with comics made with the actual dolls? "I didn’t know that was a real thing." <<<< Me either. What's the last thing you knitted? I've never knitted before. Who was your first online friend? Emma. :') She was the first person who joined my RP mob back in the Animal Planet forum days. Why do you take surveys? Be honest. Boredom, distraction, and sometimes I just wanna ramble about whatever. Does mail get delivered to your door or do you have a mailbox outside? Our mailbox is by the side of the road at the end of our driveway. Your doorbell rings out of the blue. What's your reaction? Let Mom answer it. I don't answer the door ever if I don't expect someone or can peek outside and don't recognize them. Are all the lamps in your home LED or other energy saving lights? I don't know. Do you prefer writing by hand or typing? Typing. I can't write very long at all before my carpal tunnel flares up. Think of one of the biggest decisions you've had to make in your life...If you made a different choice, how different would your life be now? I'd be dead, that simple. Have you ever taken a course on CPR? No. What makes you laugh most effortlessly? You can guess it pretty easily. What makes you cry most effortlessly? I make it a rule that I "can't" listen to "Eternally Yours" by Motionless In White because there hasn't been even ONE occasion where it hasn't made me cry, even when I was stupid enough to binge it because it's just a good song. I've broken that "rule" before because I do just genuinely enjoy the song, but I know the pain truly isn't worth it, so I haven't heard it in a decently long time. What is the best smell in the whole world? Cinnamon rolls, probably. My body wash is currently that kind of smell, and Jesus Christ it's the best part of showering. Do you wear a watch? No. Can you tell time from an analog clock? Yes. What a time it'll be when kids can't anymore... Is there a number or a combination of numbers that feels important to you? Only dates, but not numbers themselves. What is the most socially awkward thing you've done? *gestures at my life as a whole* Is your computer decorated in any way? No. If your old class was to have a reunion, would you attend it? No. No. I don't want to relive my high school experience; it would be too painful for me to willingly walk into. What's the worst thing that's ever happened to you? I would say "the breakup," but technically it was letting him basically own me and my every neuron of joy. Not by his will of course, but my own. I was stupid and just... handed those rights over without really realizing it. I can harp forever and ever and EVER about the importance of making sure you own yourself and your emotions. Do you ever donate money to charity? If so, which charity and why? Blah blah blah, I don't get an income, you know this. Whenever I do, I 100% plan on donating to every charity stream Mark ever hosts again, as well as some other people's. I'd love to donate to a lot of places. Would you ever want to get married? If so, why? Yes, because society has made it too instilled in me that it's just like... this ultimate validation of "forever" with your partner, even though I know you can be just as or even far more invested in your relationship without marriage. The only *true* benefit of marriage imo is for legal and financial reasons, but yeah, I still want it. Like I said, it's too deeply embedded in that brain of mine that it's a relationship goal. Why do you live the way you do? I'm not even living the way I want to, so... Have you ever abused an animal? No, and I say "fuck you" with every ounce of sincerity and loathing if you have. Do you think animals are less important than humans? If so, why? Nope. We share this earth and grew from the same roots, so what *really* makes us better? We might be smarter (generally) and more developed as the apex predator, but that does not equate to being more important than, say, even a gnat. That creature has the exact same level of rights to be here as the human species does. I could go on and on and on about this topic. How close was the last person close to you who has died? Not extremely, but she was still important to and loved by me. Grandma and I were very, very different and butted heads more than once, but her love was unconditional, and she showed boundless kindness to others. She showed a courage I see as unmatched in the face of death. I truly, deeply, in the very core of my heart hope she is at peace and experiencing all joys she ever wished for. How does death in general make you feel? Well, it depends on how I'm looking at it. I fully accept it is an inevitable phase in simply existing that none of us will ever evade, so it's not exactly terrifying to me, though of course I don't want it anytime soon. If I'm thinking about people I love dying, I definitely get sad about it and scared of that possibly eternal separation. Is there a person you absolutely loathe? If so, why do you loathe them? Not that I know personally, no. Has anyone ever told you that you're rude? If so, what caused it? No; I think I'm very mannerly, honestly. Have you ever seen a therapist? I've regularly seen therapists since I started middle school. I advocate for everyone to have one, honestly, whether you have a mental illness or not. Have you ever been homeless? In technical terms, yes, but a friend let me stay with her until Mom and I settled into a new place. Have you ever been completely broke? That's the actual story of my life. Well, not me personally considering I've never had to take care of myself financially, but my mom struggles very, very badly with this, and mind you, she's frugal. Just disgustingly underpaid when she worked, and her current status with disability isn't exactly incredibly generous. I live under her roof, so. Have you ever had a steady job? No. Have you ever needed a loan? If so, what for? Have you paid it back? Yes, for school, and no. I do NOT want to know how in debt I am with schools. Have you ever wanted to go to space? Not seriously, no. What's the weirdest thing you've ever seen or heard? I am 99.99% sure mine and Jason's old roommates were having some ~kinky~ sex once while I was alone on the couch against their bedroom. Preeeetty sure the girl was making meowing sounds. They were furries (who I want to emphasize have zero judgment from me; I actually think they're very brave and creative), so that was... something I definitely wasn't used to hearing, haha. What has been the most exciting moment of your life thus far? Probably when Mark N O T I C E D me on Tumblr by reblogging a gif I made of him and his pupper, and I LITERALLY struggled to sleep for three days lmfaoooo. How many birds can you name just by looking at them? Uhhhh a pretty decent amount, I'd say. Which birds are most common around your neighborhood? Crows, sparrows, cardinals and bluejays if you're lucky, robins... pretty basic stuff like that. What do you think is the most interesting sea creature? Octopi are absolutely fascinating with their intelligence. How do you reset your head to zero, so to speak? Take a nap. That usually works. Have you ever gone exploring an abandoned building? Yeah, I love that shit and really wish I could do it more. Bring my camera, too. Are there any foreign television shows you enjoy watching? Some animes. Do you have any clocks in your house that chime when the hour changes? Do those types of clocks annoy you? No. I actually quite like them, though. Has anyone ever let you borrow some of their music, promising you'd love it, but you really didn't? Did you lie to the person and agree, or tell the truth, that you hated it? My dad lent me his Shinedown CD once clearly without thinking I could just look up the album online, haha... He's an old clueless man, leave 'im be. But anyway, of course I listened to it for him and I enjoyed it; I especially loved "The Human Radio," "Kill Your Conscience" and "Pyro." Have you had the same doctor pretty much your whole life, or have you went to a bunch of different ones over the years? Have you ever been to the doctor thinking something was horribly wrong with you, but it turned out to be something minor? Mine has changed a few times, but I haven't had "a bunch." As for the second question, not to my recollection. Is the background on your phone a default picture, or a picture you took? What is the picture of? The lock screen is a pastel-styled list of mental health reminders: "i am strong, i am loved, i am enough." My home screen has been some adorable meerkat pups for a while, which I didn't take. What is your favorite type of print (ex: zebra, stripes, argyle)? Do you have a lot of things with this print on it? Ummmm maybe plaid? No. Are there any stores you feel uncomfortable going into (ex: if you dress girly, do you feel uncomfortable going into Hot Topic)? Are there any stores that you refuse, or just never go in to? The only situation I could think of would be a sex shop. That'd be so fuckin uncomfortable. What is your favorite brand of clothing? Is this a brand that is sort of expensive, or is it pretty affordable? I'm heavily biased towards Cloak, haha. I just support anything and everything Mark takes part it, and it's his and jacksepticeye's business. I have one shirt and it's genuinely great quality and reall comfy. I wouldn't call its products expensive, but they're not cheap, either. What person do you text the most? My mom or Sara, depending on the day. Do you have any pictures that always make you laugh, or cry? Are they digital pictures, or printed pictures? What is the significance? No. Not pictures I have anymore, at least. Have you ever eaten raw pumpkin? Omg I would never. I hate the flavor of any sort of pumpkin food. Does your car have a name? I don't have my own car, but Mom jokingly calls hers "Olivia." Who was the last person you made plans with? One of my sister's in-laws that's actually the mother of one of my closest friends contacted me to plan some family pictures. What is the rudest thing someone has done recently towards you? I can't think of anything recent. How do you feel about your hair right now? It needs to be trimmed and dyed. How fast have you driven a car? I think accidentally leaning towards 80 on a highway. When you're hanging out with friends + you become bored, do you just leave or endure the boredom? Given I can't leave without a car, I deal with it. What did you last plug into your computer? What were you doing with this? The charger for obvious reasons. What color(s) have you dyed your hair? Red, purple, black, then red, purple, and lighter brown highlights. I really wish I could dye it more and actually have the color stick... Was your first kiss perfect? It was to me. What song did you hear last? I have "Over The Mountain" by Ozzy on now. (: Does anyone have any blackmail on you? No. Have you ever walked into the guys' bathroom? HA, once during a teacher work day (my mom was an assistant) at my elementary school. My sisters and friends went in there to be little "rebels." I remember being mega confused with urinals, haha. Then as a teen and adult, I've been in the dance studio's boy's restroom as well as a church's to help Mom clean. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with? My therapist. Are you shy? I am VERY shy. Are you talkative? Generally, no, but when I'm in a very good mood, I tend to be. Has your most recent ex ever seen you cry? Oh jeez, she saw me wail once. When was the last time you were called "cute"? I'm not sure. Would you rather be called "hot", "cute" or "beautiful"? "Beautiful." Do you have a little sister? Yep. Definitely not "little" anymore, though. About to have her Master's in social work... How many arguments have you had with the last person you kissed? Given our childhood, we've fought a lot, but mostly just as kids over very, very stupid things. As adults, we've had a serious argument once or twice and then just some very minor disagreements sprinkled in there. Do you know anyone who's been arrested? Oh yes. What're you planning on doing after this? Another survey. What time did you go to sleep last night? Damn, it wasn't even 8:00. I was EXHAUSTED and actually slept decently for once in my life. Do you like waking up to good morning texts in the morning? I mean, I'd think most people would. It's a sweet, easy way of someone showing they care and think about you. Have you left some things unsaid with a certain person? Yeah. What was the last thing that made you happy? We had syrup to add to my breakfast, haha. I don't know if these are a thing everywhere, but I looove what we just call "pancakes on a stick," which is like a corndog, but with sausage and pancake batter. Dipping it in syrup is amaaaaaaziiiiiiing. Do you like the smell of rain? I don't love it, but it's refreshing sometimes. It's mostly just associated with a bittersweet memory, so it can be triggering to smell. I know, that sounds immensely stupid. What was the last thing you took a picture of? A very, very relatable meme to show Sara, haha. She doesn't have a Facebook, so that'll do. When you go to McDonald's, what drink do you usually get? I always get a Coke. What’s the nickname of your home state? Tar Heel State, from discovering tar in the since aptly-named Tar River. Have you ever thought about your wedding? I mean duh. What’s the worse type of weather in your opinion? Hot and humid, ugh. Especially right after a summer afternoon thunderstorm. It's unbearable. You can't fucking breathe outside, and you set one foot out of the door and it's soaked. Do you have a Kindle or iPad or neither? Neither. Would you rather read or write? Write. When was the last time someone took a picture of you? The time Misty visited last month and we were taking family pictures. Would you rather see Taylor Swift or Carrie Underwood in concert? I wouldn't pay for either or even willingly go to one or the other, but if I had to go for whatever reason, Carrie. She has a beautiful voice as well as a good handful of songs I actually like. I'm not a Taylor fan; there are only like, two old songs by her I enjoy. When someone screws you over, do you get back with revenge? No. I may not be the best at adulting, but damn, I'm not that bad. Name something negative that you hate about yourself? I overthink like a motherfucker. About everything. Is there a dead end road near where you live? I live on one. Huh, that's actually been the case three times... wow. Four if you count the apartment. Who are you tired of seeing in the news a lot (celebrities)? I don't care. I don't even pay attention to the news, other than Covid updates. Have you ever had to call and complain about a product you bought? No. Name something positive you love about yourself: I care a lot about people. Can you smell anything right now? No, besides however my house naturally smells that I'm numb to. Have you spoken to a relative on the phone today? No. How does alcohol affect you? I flush in my face very obviously, and I become more outgoing and talkative. Have you ever eaten tofu and if so, did you enjoy it? I've never tried it, but I very much doubt I'd enjoy it. What was the last type of meat you ate? Pork. What colour is your toothpaste? Blue and white. Have you ever been suspended from school? No. Have you ever inhaled helium? Once, I believe. Are you a fan of Adam Sandler? Yeah, I think he's pretty funny and a talented actor. What was the last fruit you ate? An apple. A candied apple for Valentine's Day, but still an apple, haha. Have you ever watched Parks and Recreation? With Sara's family, yeah. It was fine. Have you watched a movie this week? I haven't watched a movie in many months. Have you set an alarm today? Yeah, just to ensure I was up for group therapy today. Have you asked someone for advice today? No. What was the last website you were on, other than this one? YouTube. Have you ever been to Hawaii? No, but it'd be cool. Well, thinking about the humidity... Have you watched more than an hour of TV today? No; I haven't watched television in a long time. Do you keep magazines by your toilet? No. The last time you got dressed up, where did you go? I got my makeup done and put on a dress for a Halloween "witch" shoot with my friend and some other people. The pictures pretty much don't exist because they're blurry as shit and way too dark because we left too late. I don't know why we even left the house to do it by the time everyone figured their shit out. I was really disappointed because I thought Summer made me look really, really pretty. ;_; Did the one person who hurt you the most in your life apologize? Yes, but I don't know if he really meant it. He might have just wanted me off his back, but I kinda feel now that he meant it, at least regarding how it happened. Are you proud of who you are? Only in the sense that I think I have a good heart. Otherwise, no. I've accomplished so little. Have you ever been to Costco? We don't have those here, so no. Do/did you have to wear a uniform to your high school? No, thank Christ. Only in middle school. How many video games do you own? A whole lot. Have you ever been to a casino? If so, which one(s)? No. Have you ever visited a sex shop? No. How many sets of keys do you have for your house? One. Do you give spare keys to your place to your friends and family? Our landlord/family friend has one. Then obviously my sisters do, too. Have you ever ridden a bicycle through a busy city? Oh hell no. Do you use Instagram? How often do you post there? Yes, two for each of my photography "styles." I don't post a lot myself, but I react to stuff. When was the last time you high-fived someone? I believe the last time I was at my sister's and my nephew caught a Pokemon on his first throw in Pokemon GO. He and his sister LOVE that game; that's the first thing they ask to do when I come over, haha. Their dad doesn't like it because it's "evil" (which he finds most things, really...), and it's something I could roll my eyes into the back of my head about, but I still have to respect his parenting and ask if they can play it first. He let's 'em, just not long. He also took away the Pikachu plushy I gave Aubree because it's her favorite one. :^) Guess who doesn't fuckin like him lmao. Do you like writing? How often do you write? I love writing! I don't do it very much nowadays except through surveys, though. RP is kinda on pause, so surveys is really how I just get stuff out, even if it isn't creative. Are there any posters or artworks hanging in your living room? Artwork and family photos, yes. What's your favourite place to get pizza? I'm a basic bitch that loves her some Domino's. How many times have you been to the beach? Quite a few times. We live only like two hours away, and considering Myrtle Beach is a common dance competition location, we've been a couple handfuls of instances. Has there ever been a fire inside your house? Tell me the story. No. After we moved out of my childhood house though that we actually owned, the fucking idiots who were moving in completely roasted it to pitch by setting boxes on the goddamn stove and accidentally turning it on. The house had to be entirely rebuilt. My parents were livid considering it was THEIR house. Have you ever had a scary encounter with a wild animal? No. What was the best school project you remember doing? I actually really enjoyed the huge essay I did on toxic masculinity the last time I tried college. I've always been very firm about letting men be humans and not emotionless robots, but I learned a lot more while researching and writing. Name a video game you can play over and over again: Shadow of the Colossus is #1. I've beaten it at least 30 times, maybe even 40+; it's been too long since I've seen the save files. It's a relatively short game (you can beat it in less than like, four hours if you know what you're doing) and just very relaxing yet simultaneously absolutely epic to me. God, I want a PS4 to play the remaster, like beyond words. It looks incredible, and I want to try to get white Agro. Have you ever petted a cow, a sheep, or a pig? A pig, yes. I love pigs.

#survey #surveys #questions #lyrics: ''you're gonna go far kid'' by the offspring

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lovemesomesurveys · 3 years

Text

[yourheaventonight]

What color is your couch? They’re gray.

How do you normally wear your hair? It’s always up in a messy bun.

Alcohol = the ultimate truth serum. Yes or no? Some people tend to get too talkative and comfortable and say things they probably wouldn’t normally.

Are you a righty or a lefty? I’m a righty.

Do you own a pair of handcuffs? No.

Do flying bugs creep you out? Ew, yes. ALL bugs creep me out, but flying definitely doesn’t help cause they can fly right at me. lsflsfjldkfj

Can a girl love sex without being a whore? ...Yes. Loving sex doesn’t make you a whore. I think a lot of people love sex. I’m not going to judge people’s sex lives. Also, I just don’t use those type of terms.

Would you ever be in a long-distance relationship? I don’t know.

Do lemons sound appealing to you at the moment? I like lemon flavored desserts, but I don’t eat actual lemons.

What size bed do you have? A full.

When was the last time you brushed your teeth? Yesterday. Before you judge, it’s only 6:36AM so I haven’t done so yet today.

Can you sleep in total darkness? Nooo. I have to sleep with my TV on for some light and sound.

What piercings do you have? Just my earlobes.

Any tattoos? Nope.

Is your glass half empty or half full? My glass is broken.

Are frogs cute or gross? The slimy thing isn’t so cute.

Do you ever wish you were born in a different century? No.

Which country's culture interests you most? Things from all different kinds of cultures interest me. <<<

What kind of guys/girls do you go for? None for the past few years... I forget what it feels like to be crushing or have an interest in someone in that way. It feels like forever ago since I’ve last felt that.

Do you regret something you have no real control over? Yes.

Do you enjoy writing? I used to.

What do you have as your screen saver? My screen just goes black after like 15 minutes.

Do you have a webcam? It’s built into my MacBook. I’ve never used it, though.

Do you still have your tonsils? Yes.

Aren't beetles fucking grody? Ugh, what’s with the bug questions in the past two surveys I’ve done. ALL BUGS ARE GROSS AND CREEPY.

How do you feel about Oprah? I’ve never been obsessed like a lot of people seemed/seem to be.

^ What the fuck kind of name is Oprah anyway? It reminds me of okra. Don’t gotta attack her name.

Would you ever pierce your tongue twice? Like, one right next to the other? I wouldn’t pierce it at all.

Do you like bonfires? Yes. I’ve always wanted to have one on the beach.

What makes your skin crawl? BUGS.

What's your favorite flower? I don’t really have one.

Look up Community Property by Steel Panther. Listen to the whole song. No.

Share your thoughts here. --

Have you ever dyed your hair an unnatural color? I’ve been dyeing it red the past few years.

What's for dinner? I’m not sure, yet.

Have you ever had someone draw a picture of you before? I’ve had those caricature drawings done before.

What confuses you most? Life.

Do you like monkeys? Sure.

Does anything on your body hurt at the moment? Of course.

Have you ever been called a bad influence? Not that I know of.

What book are you reading right now? Cold Highway by Mary Stone.

Any bands you would like to recommend to me? Hmm.

What makes you laugh? My doggo.

What time is it? 6:47AM.

Doesn't intentionally bad grammar annoy you? Yes.

What type of person can you not stand? Arrogant, cocky, close-minded, very opinionated and judgmental people.

Care to share what song is stuck in your head? There isn’t one, currently.

What languages can you speak? Just English fluently, but I know some Spanish.

Pirates are better than ninjas. Fact or fiction? I’m gonna go with pirates cause it reminds of Pirates of the Caribbean at Disneyland, one of my favorite rides.

There is always a bit of truth behind every 'j/k', yes? Not always, but sometimes I do think that. Especially if it’s said more than once.

What do you get complimented on most often? Nothing.

What's the weirdest compliment you've ever received? Someone apparently thought I had polio because I’m in a wheelchair and told me that I looked pretty for someone with polio. Uh...

Who/what was the last person/thing to make you blush? I don’t recall.

What kind of muffins do you like? Banana (without the nut), blueberry, cinnamon streusel, lemon poppyseed, chocolate chip, birthday cake. Dang, I want a muffin now.

Do you like warm or cold weather more? Cold, hands down.

Don't you hate it when sites go under maintenance and you cant get access? If it’s something I need access to at that moment, like typically that tends to happen with websites I pay my bills on.

What form(s) of art do you enjoy most? Literature, film, music.

Piercings are sexy. Truth or lie? I’m not into them.

Have you ever worn a French maid costume? No.

Have you ever had couscous? I don’t know what that is.

Do you like listening to yourself talk? Ew, no.

When was the last time you were congested? Hm. It’s been awhile.

Do you wear eyeliner? When I actually wear makeup, yes, but I haven’t worn any makeup in like 4 years.

Do you show everyone your tongue when something turns it another color? No, I don’t feel the need to do that.

Who is the greatest writer alive, in your opinion? There’s countless great writers. How about the greatest painter? There’s countless great painters. I may not have a favorite myself, but I can acknowledge that there’s a lot of beautiful art pieces out there.

The greatest musician? There’s countless great musicians.

The greatest poet? There’s countless great poets. I don’t read poetry, but again I can acknowledge there’s a lot of great poets out there.

Have any good scar stories you want to share? I don’t consider any of them “good.”

Are you pierced anywhere below the waist? No, I’m not.

Facebook games: Fun or brain-frying? I don’t play any.

Do you dance well? Not at all.

Are you into anyone at the moment? No.

Do you touch yourself at night? No.

What body parts can you 'crack'? My knuckles, wrists, arms, neck.

What color do you wear most often? Black.

What about the opposite sex drives you crazy? (The good kinda crazy.) It’s been so long since I’ve been interested in someone or felt that way.

What candle/incense flavors do you enjoy most? (Yes I said flavors. :P) Autumnal scents from Bath & Body Works and patchouli.

Do you complain a lot? In surveys and on Twitter, but I keep to myself a lot in person. I could complain a lot to those around me if I wanted to, but I don’t because I don’t want to be a burden, annoying, or bring them down. I’ve known people who constantly complained and it gets to be a lot real quick. It’s draining. So, I just suffer in silence, ha.

What do you do when you're mad? Shutdown and cry.

Have you ever thought you could 'save' someone? No.

Do you have any 'special' talents? *Wiggles eyebrows* Nope.

Yankee makes the best candles. Yes or no? Kinda overpriced.

What do you do when you can't sleep? I have a nightly routine that consists of scrolling through Tumblr, doing surveys, and listening to ASMR for that reason.

Have you ever liked someone you barely knew? Little crushes, yeah.

When was the last time you felt like a creeper? I don’t feel like a creeper.

Who seems to have taken up permanent residence in your thoughts? Not a who, but certain things.

Black & Milds: yay or nay? I don’t smoke.

Is smoking a turn-on for you? No.

Do you get excited or scared when you see a thunderstorm brewing? I love ‘em. We don’t get them often here, though.

Speaking of brew, when's the last time you had a beer? Almost 10 years ago. If I’m talkin’ brew I’m talking coffee.

What sub-genre of metal do you enjoy most? I don’t listen to metal.

Do you need to shave? No.

How do you feel about Obama? This question has come up in a lot of the surveys I’ve done lately.

Do you own any bandanas? Nope.

What's your favorite gangster movie? I don’t watch any.

Who/what makes your heart race? Anxiety.

How do you think I should end this survey? You just did.

#personal #text #survey #surveys

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theseerasures · 4 years

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Frozen 2 Reaction Post

surprisebitch.gif

this is 5000% because i don’t wanna do other stuff, but is it not poetic justice that i should come back to the tumbls for Frozen 2: Elsa Runs Away Some More

i’m gonna prologue this by saying that by and large i enjoyed the film tremendously; of course since this is 2019 i would have enjoyed anything that didn’t end with Elsa committing nonsensical war crimes before being put down like Old Yeller or pulling a no-homo to transcend time and space (that’s right, i’m hip enough to know about TWO of the biggest media fiascos this year, you jelly?), but the film was enjoyable even beyond that, mostly in how it affirmed my own opinions about the universe

HOWEVER, there were also huge problems that really have to be addressed, and we’re gonna start with those

cut for length and a truly immense amount of spoilers

things i didn’t like:

so the Iduna being Sami All Along thing was, um. bad! it was bad, and really reads like the team trying to cover their asses after the blowback from the first movie. why was it such a big deal for ~a Northuldran to love an Arendellian~ when Arendelle was 100% at fault in the conflict? were the spirits just like “oh the indigenous tribe that has cared for us and lived alongside us for centuries are fine i guess but OH LOOK the whitest among them just made googly eyes at the son of the guy who wants to colonize and enslave us, let’s root for those crazy kids and make their firstborn the avatar”

making Iduna a White Sami and leaning on the excuse that in real life the Sami people are linguistic and ethnically diverse and some of them can pass as white would have been fine if they didn’t EXPLICITLY RACIALIZE EVERY OTHER TRIBE MEMBER ON SCREEN. come on guys, just admit you liked Last Samurai but knew that that exact premise wouldn’t fly anymore

why couldn’t it be just a nice person who saved Agnar? why did we get yet another version of the old Pocahontas fetish?

why did Iduna being Northuldran REMAIN such a big deal to the point that she never told her kids about it and she and Agnar had to tell separate but equal bedtime stories about the same event??

whew i’m so glad this all happened so Elsa, the whitest non-anthropomorphic-snowman character in the movie, could save those savage natives with spears! They Needed Her Guidance

the songs this time mostly...felt like they didn’t really want this movie to be a musical but were contractually obligated to write songs for Disney until the heat death of the universe

case in point: Some Things Never Change was going for the Happily Ever After vibe that the Steven Universe movie had, but it...didn’t really feel earned. we obviously needed a place-setter song, but it didn’t really establish anything about what the characters have been up to or what might be still bothering them, because apparently everything is great! this worked for Steven Universe because it came off of five SEASONS of character development, but Elsa’s last big character revelation that we the audience saw was “wow guess i’m not the worst scum on earth after all.” the timeskip can only do so much, is what i’m saying

Kristoff got NOTHING to work with. i’m not like, horribly broken up about it since i know they had to keep it tight for the kids, but fucking OLAF got a heavier arc than he did, and it feels like a missed opportunity that they didn’t link HIS backstory to the Northuldrans, what with him being orphaned/abandoned/raised by trolls already set up. it doesn’t have to siphon into the White Savior main story at all, just have--i dunno, a few more scenes with the Northuldrans and him realizing that he’s probably descended from refugees who got cut off from the forest

the proposal thing was cute until i realized that they were going to just hit the same beats over and over again with each scene. it should have been resolved in act 1 instead of Kristoff disappearing for half the movie and then tacking on the proposal at the very end. not every subplot has to be stretched out to the end! in this case i feel like stretching it out actually REGRESSED aspects of Kristanna, since it relied on Anna misreading so many signals that it strained believability even for Anna. we’re supposed to think they’ve NEVER talked about this, despite having dated for 3 years and consistently trading off on being the most Extra person in the room?

the confirmation that Olaf’s fingers can wiggle will haunt my dreams

me when the stone giants interrupted Elsa’s conversation with Honeymaren: yOU COCKBLOCKERS

i find myself growing increasingly weary of the now token Disney Wink at Camera, and Elsa rolling her eyes and her past self doing Let It Go was probably the apex of that particular antipathy. showing that you’re so Over the song that made you billions in a movie that you’re shilling to the EXACT SAME CROWD is the most obnoxious humble-flex i can think of

as much as i liked Elsa jumping into the Pit of Past Misdeeds and freezing to death, i think the scene happened waaaaaayyyy too fast, especially if you compare it to how long it took for Anna in the first movie. she’s not really given any time to process what’s happening, and it kind of lessens the emotional impact.

Olaf is gone!! he’s gone, i miss him so much!! i cry myself to sleep!!!! OLAFFFFFFF!!! false. i do not miss him

i distinctly recall liking Olaf just fine in the first movie and actually found him tolerable here too, but wow i was not happy when they resurrected him, even though i knew it was a sure thing

maybe it’s because NOTHING had consequences in the end and even Arendelle, the place that all the characters have been treating like a thoroughfare for two movies, had to get saved at the last second!! Arendelle the place??? we were supposed to care enough about that to want it to be saved?? it’s not the fucking GALACTICA guys! there weren’t even any people left in the town! it’s bizarre that they tried to go so hard in the reparations route and then swerved at the last second. let Arendelle drown you cowards! let the Northuldrans offer help in solidarity if you really wanted the “bridge between worlds” angle, but come the fuck on! didn’t something like this happen with Life Is Strange already?

why didn’t Elsa go to her sister’s coronation is it just like a thing now for her to miss the major life events of her family members

the statues they unveiled at the end were horrifying

things i liked:

a lowkey thing that i’ve always appreciated about the first movie was its willingness to Go There when it came to depicting well intentioned parents who are still mired in various character flaws and wound their kids deeply, so it was nice to see that return and get expanded with parents who had Lives separate from their kids which made them That Way, and the consequences of those Lives often come back to influence subsequent generations no matter how much they try to keep it contained. it’s a good, logical extension from what happened with Elsa in the first movie.

and it’s another Steven Universe vibe, but they can go further with it faster because Elsa and Anna are the hegemony in this movie. they’re the history-makers, so their family drama very easily becomes political, and the lessons they pick up from family memories immediately end up changing the fantasy history landscape. it’s dope

baby Anna’s lil feetsies

Anna wanted to marry everyone and Elsa thought kissing was gross

everyone does feel palpably older! the first movie had a very teen feel insofar as everything was We Have to Do This or We Will All Die Immediately, but this time around all the characters feel much more comfortable in their own skin throughout the movie

everyone getting more than two outfits and all wearing pants

the revelation after so many headcanons of Elsa being a ruthless pragmatist, Elsa always being two steps ahead politically, Elsa being a literal and metaphorical chessmaster that Elsa is...actually just kind of spacey and weird was for me extremely welcome. i think part of this was done in service of Anna becoming queen at the end, but it makes sense. “attack it with ice powers” and “run away” are still pretty much the only two strings to Elsa’s bow. this is not to say that she was a bad queen, or that she didn’t try her damndest to be a fair and just ruler--when it comes down to it i think Elsa still knows more Facts about how to rule a kingdom than Anna ever will, it’s just that she’s also horribly averse to conflict and “pacing in place while blaming herself” is pretty much the extent of her productivity under serious pressure.

what sets Elsa apart (other than the ice powers) isn’t that she’s prodigiously talented, but that she’s kindhearted and extremely sensitive to the emotions and fates of others. (she’s the one who asks what happened to the spirits when Agnar is done with his half of the story.) she agonized over hurting Anna one way vs. hurting Anna another way for THIRTEEN YEARS and still couldn’t make up her mind until she was literally backed into a corner, and even that decision was “run away but FARTHER.” Anna wanting to reconcile with Elsa even after thirteen years wasn’t just because Anna’s love eclipses all; Elsa also left that door open for her, because she could never be quite as ruthless or even SELFLESS as to send her sister away for good. (”then leave! actually jk i’ll leave instead”)

but Anna wasn’t ever the exception for Elsa, either. Anna wasn’t the only corner of Elsa’s heart that she left open--Elsa’s like that with EVERYONE, even people she just met, or disembodied voices in the wild. Elsa can never do quite as many Right Things as she thinks she should, she can never be quite as driven, as strong, as single-minded as she thinks she needs to be, to fully commit to making decisions for other people. she feels too deeply and wants too much, even after all those years of trying to scour herself out with a lathe. it’s what ruins and saves her.

Anna and Elsa being horrible at charades in diametrically opposite ways was the most life affirming thing to happen to me this year

Elsa couldn’t act out ice

the two of them had MULTIPLE conversations with each other that didn’t immediately result in mortal peril!!! what a world guys

Into the Unknown fucking slaps but i’m now REALLY confused about the diegesis of the songs in this movie. i’d assumed they were all happening in story, what with the Voice and the multiple references to Let It Go, but Elsa literally bays at the moon in the middle of the night here and no one woke up??? maybe they’re all just really heavy sleepers who knows

or maybe the staff just take it in stride at this point--oh, Her Majesty is singing and crying again

Kristoff and Anna CANONICALLY FUCK, and not even in the typical cartoon “look they have kids, they canonically fuck” way in the “hey my sister and her snowchild that we’re all coparenting together are asleep on the sled, shall we fuck a mere three feet away without even putting up a divider or something” way

gotta give Jen Lee kudos for making the “Elsa has ice powers because she’s the fifth spirit” retcon make thematic sense. the most obvious way to go about this WOULD have been the avatar direction, but Elsa isn’t the union of the four elements but the union of the spirits and humanity, which is to say that she witnesses them and keeps their memories, bringing them to life and solidifying them with her powers. she’s obviously the best person for the job, since y’know. she spent thirteen years on one memory alone.

wait does this mean Elsa is basically the Resurrection Stone?? buhhhh i don’t wanna think about it

of course Anna’s sword just came from her grabbing it from an ice statue i don’t know what else i expected

i laughed at both of Olaf’s reenactments i don’t know what to tell you

i feel...Some Kinda Way about the discourse saying that Mattias being black is problematic because it suggests black collusion in indigenous genocide, but it’s not my place to comment on that, so i’ll just say that it was a pleasure to see Sterling K. Brown having fun in a role instead of his usual gravitas and misery

Elsa first making eye contact with the icemander, or Two Feral Creatures Recognize Each Other As Such--i can’t believe i thought Hiccup would be the weirdest horse girl i’d ever encounter in fiction when it’s OBVIOUSLY Elsa

ELSA COULDN’T ACT OUT ICE

what a novel concept to have Elsa charging forward while Anna tries to pull her back, telling her to slow down, that she’s climbing too high

appreciated the subtle seeding they did of Anna’s political savvy, what with her actually talking to the lost Arendellian soldiers and restraining herself from making outlandish promises to everyone she meets

Kristoff made a friend!

Elsa met one (1) girl that wasn’t her sister and immediately decided she had to live in the woods forever

Tribe Leader Lady’s reaction to Kristoff’s proposal

can’t believe Lost in the Woods invented cinema and music videos

the sisters at the shipwreck is hands down the best scene in the entire movie, aided by the drastically different palette they used to color this scene--all grays, browns, and blacks, even the surrounding environment, like Agnar and Iduna’s despair polluted the whole landscape. Elsa and Anna look horribly out of place here, like they can’t possibly be real in a world that looks like this.

it really snuck up on me how much this scene is a pivot for both of their characters: Anna’s instinct here is to look forward, to find clues that will point them to the next step; Elsa’s instinct is toward grief and, after the reveal, self-blame. for all her growth there’s still a part of Elsa that sees her existence as the catastrophe that keeps hurling the wreckage of the world at her feet. it’s something that i don’t think she’ll ever be able to completely move past.

Elsa, looking at Anna like she’s the only real thing in the world as Anna tells her that she believes in her, more than anyone or anything

“i just don’t want you dying trying to be everything for everyone else!” jesus fucking CHRIST guys

Olaf’s growing up crisis was mostly just...kinda there for me, but i will say the cut to his horrified expression when Anna said the word “dying” really did get to me

Anna switching between a Formal Court hairstyle and an Athleisure hairstyle is Bi Representation, Elsa getting increasingly more disheveled over two movies is Lesbian Representation

do i Get horse movies now

Elsa happy crying when she sees her mother in the cave made ME incredibly happy--her face is so much more dynamic this time around!

i wanna make fun of her for her stupid Dance Dance Revolution ice magic during Show Yourself but honestly..........fucking superb you funky little lesbian

aw Elsa you stood up to...an ice hallucination of your racist grandpa! in another three years (six years in production) you might be ready for Thanksgiving dinner

Elsa in the last movie: i’m never going back, the past is in the past!!!!

Elsa in this movie: brb gotta go hurl myself into a Pit of Past Misdeeds and turn myself into one of the embodied memories

Anna immediately understanding what went down at the forest before and that even if she wasn’t directly complicit in the violence she benefits from it every day, deciding to rip down Imperialism Dam without hesitation

The Next Right Thing didn’t really do it for me musically but as a core concept for Anna’s character and ethos it fucking ROCKS (pun obviously intended). i was so worried going in that they wouldn’t know what to do with Anna after the first movie other than give her powers, but instead we got confirmation that this IS her superpower: her ability to forge ahead with whatever life has given her has ALWAYS been her greatest strength.

this also explains why she felt so aimless and intent on protecting Elsa and nothing else before this point; Anna isn’t interested in delving deeply into the past, not when every other member of her family was consumed by it. with this she’s finally able to convert memory into action, and she shines.

(of course she couldn’t have GOTTEN to this point if Elsa hadn’t been so convinced that the past was worth pursuing, confirming my belief that the two of them share exactly one brain cell)

OBVIOUSLY action for Anna translates into “make myself bait for stone giants and STAND ON THE VERY DAM I WANT THEM TO RIP APART” Anna you fucking walnut

Anna threw the first brick at Imperialism Dam, actually

the understated moment when Kristoff just pushes aside his own insecurities and just asks Anna what she needs

the shot of Elsa falling into the water after she’s thawed nearly did me in

Elsa horseback riding over the water is. wow it’s the gayest thing i’ve ever seen

Anna’s coronation outfit made me kinda wistful. she looks so grown up! she looks like her mother

(i mean she always looks like her mother they literally have the same face but whatever you know what i mean)

me on my deathbed: eLSA COuldN’T aCT oUt ICE

stray observations:

is Arendelle just a tourist town where one day the guy who owned the largest house was like “this is a KINGDOM NOW I’M THE KING” and the 50 other townies who lived there were just too polite to argue

i mean it’d explain why the queen, her heir, and the heir’s consort could just waltz out of there for a week long trip and leAVE THE TROLLS IN CHARGE

when they first started getting chummy with the Northuldrans i lost my god damn mind and was like “are they gonna give Kristoff a boyfriend and Anna a girlfriend what’s happening”

is it required that female Disney protagonists have to go to a blue tinted place to realize that the magic answer was in them all along now the same exact thing happened to Moana and Rey

Elsa’s ice creations are confirmed to fade away if she dies, which...is a confirmation we needed i guess

why didn’t Mattias and Yelana fall in love to make the Chosen One instead, they had chemistry

(i mean. i know why)

i hope Anna got to yell at Elsa for at least five minutes and maybe slug her for pulling that “i’m going to Mordor alone!!!” bullshit

for a second at the end i was like “are they gonna do the HTTYD thing where we flash forward to ten years later and Anna and Kristoff take their kids to visit Elsa IS KRISTOFF GONNA GROW A DAD BEARD” but no we just had lesbian wind and origami instead

whatever your take on the movie i think we can all agree that the scene where Olaf calls the Irish “a plague on this planet which is slowly rotting it down to the rind and which must be excised” was NOT okay

#'wow i wonder how many words this post is--actually maybe i don't wanna know'#frozen 2 #disney #helen writes meta

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loulougoingsolo · 4 years

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The terminal velocity of a dead bat?

GMM is possibly the best show in the category of talk shows, when it comes to making the guests feel at home. This has obviously a lot to do with Rhett and Link and their personalities, and with the good prep work by the Mythical crew - I feel that the Mythical environment just has the ability to go under the polished celebrity shell and find the human beneath. But sometimes, there are guests that just fit right in, and these are the best kind of guest episodes. Like the one today.

I remember loving the previous GMM episode with Ben Schwartz. Today was even better. I think I need to add another funny man on my list of people I love. He’ll probably never get to the top tier with Rhett and Link, but I think I love Ben Schwartz. And I think he genuinely enjoyed coming back to GMM.

Ben is promoting his latest movie, Sonic the Hedgehog, and in the spirit of being super fast, today, the guys are playing a game of Who is the fastest in doing things. In each round, the two slowest guys have to perform a slow punishment. Let’s get playing!

In the first round, the guys must empty boxes of tissues using only their mouths. I tried to think why the motion of pulling tissues from a box looked so familiar to me, and then I realized I’ve seen my parents’ dog do this very thing. I think she would have won this game, because not only does she like to empty boxes, in the time it took the guys to finish this task, she’d probably have also eaten the tissues.

Turns out, Link is the least in contact with his animal instincts, because he fails miserably at this game - while Rhett seems to struggle mostly because of his hair getting in the way. Ben has no difficulties winning this round, and as a punishment, Rhett and Link have to slowly sing Twinkle, twinkle little start while shaking a shake-weight. Since I kind of know at this point that GMM never misses an opportunity to do things with a double meaning, I feel there is a hidden joke in all of this, but the one I can think of is probably best left unwritten.

After the first round, I have this constant feeling of missing something, but surely sorting M&Ms by colour while wearing an eyepatch is just that. Right? I don’t really know how an eyepatch would make this task any more difficult, but I don’t have depth perception in the first place, so how would I know.

Rhett manages to look like a bear (while wearing a bear sweater) and a pirate at the same time, and I must agree with Ben, the eyepatch looks good on him - but I’m rooting for Link in this round, because he loves sorting things (I do too, it’s so relaxing), and this should be his forte.

Despite Rhett trying to claim he was done before dropping one candy, Link is the winner of this round - and Rhett still had one brown M&M in the wrong pile, so Link won fair and square. The punishment suggested by Ben of kissing slowly for three minutes would probably have been more interesting to watch, but I absolutely love the not-so-slow but long compliment Ben gave Link while being sporked. But why can’t Rhett say something genuinely nice to Link? He just doesn’t know how to lose.

This is how you say a compliment:

Ben: “Link, I think that you’re not only a talented and funny person... Link, you know when I see you, sometimes I feel myself be so inspired I can’t hold it down. Have you ever watched a rainbow explode into a million stars? That’s the feeling I get when I see you, because you bring so much grace, so much humour, so much civility towards everything that’s happening in the world, and it’s not just that this spork is touching me, you’ve changed the life of everybody.”

Awww!

The third round tests which of the guys is not only fastest but the most talented speed artist. I know none of the guys are famous for their drawing skills, but a chicken licking an ice-cream is not that hard to draw, right? I think Link’s drawing was actually the best one, but sadly, he was one chicken lick behind Rhett, and although Rhett’s chicken didn’t even have a tongue, he won this round.

I don’t exactly know who is getting punished for this round, the viewers or Ben and Link, but watching them plug a nose hair gives me the chills, even without them saying they’re bad boys.

The final round is a game of who can remove the toothpicks off of a grapefruit the fastest. I love it when Link uses a word no-one knows, but he was absolutely right calling the spikey fruit an echidna.

Since the guys all have one point at this time, Rhett really goes into a competitive mode for this last round, and successfully removes all the spikes first. Ben and Link are just casually chatting, while Rhett is fully focused on the task - you can almost see the fume coming from his brain. Rhett wins the game, and gets a super fast congratulation speech from Ben. When you won, you won. There you go!

In GMMore, we move on from fast men to fast animals - because, Sonic. I think I’ve learnt the same 80s facts as Rhett and Link, because I recall seeing a chart about fastest animals, and the cheetah was the fastest land animal in it. There was also a falcon which was way faster...

My favourite thing about this More has to be the unlimited abundence of not-quite-there facts about the animal kingdom. I’d watch these three talk about the wonders of nature for hours and probably still be entertained. The further this episode went, the more Rhett and Link started to compete in impressing Ben with their knowledge. They were pretty much acting like two kids who have a crush on the same person, and I think it was both adorable and hilarious.

Ben clearly had as much fun as we did today, almost as if he didn’t want the More to end. The guys didn’t quite have the telepathic connection Ben was hoping for, but I hope they at least went out to have a pint together after shooting this.

Seriously though, Rhett tried to cheat when guessing the number, but he first read the number wrong in their screen, and later apparently forgot the middle number. I wonder if he’d gotten the number correct, would he have revealed how he got there, or called himself a telepathic genius?

#gmm #gmmore #gmm 1693 #rhett and link #ben schwartz #sonic the hedgehog #who's the fastest #guessing animal speeds #great episode

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okashiras · 5 years

Text

Notes: Supplementary reading and a sequel of sorts. Enjoy.

KPOP AU PART 1

ao3 link

30 March 2014

If you had told me 4 years ago that Sasuke and Sakura would never officially confirm that they’re dating but would instead, out of nowhere, announce their engagement, I would have laughed my fucking ass off.

Anyway, I’m briefly back from my hiatus. Cheers to all of us! We did it. :’) (Or rather, they did it?)

tags: #CAN YOU BELIEVE IT!??!!, #I CAN’T BELIEVE ITT, #text post

cherry-shadow asked: you are a fandom high priestess!! ur blog is like my sasuke x sakura bible. i missed ur blog, thank u for bringing it back. bless you!!! have a nice day!! :-*

You’re very kind! Thank you!

tags: #cherry-shadow, #ask

sumuwu asked: sandy here, i’m not even that big on kage or kunoichi but i’m so glad for them and for you guys!! i support their mutual hotness. i’m sure they’ll have beautiful and talented babies in the future!!

Thank you so much for your support for our favorite couple!

PS: I love SuMu sibs, too. I just haven’t posted about them (because I’m always on a SS high). Looking forward to their comeback.

tags: #sumuwu, #ask

Anonymous asked: OH MY GOD YOU’RE BACK!!!!!1 will ur inbox be open for info/translation/general questions?? Asking for a friend. Lol ok bye!!! I love u ;A;

Haha, yes! For now. I just needed an outlet for all this excess energy and excitement. Thanks for still having me! I’ll try to reply as much as I can. But no promises that I can answer them all. ;;

tags: #Anonymous, #ask

Anonymous asked: now that they’re confirmed to have been dating for years (!!!!), i couldn’t help but want to review their interactions. do u recall moments in shows and such where it looks like their members are teasing them??

The members of Kage and Kunoichi have been kind of friends in varying capacities since before they even debuted so they’d always greet and bow to each other during shows and events. Nothing really special there. Unless we reach. Which, as you know, is exactly what this blog is for.

Since Anon specifically mentioned members (plural), I will only address moments where multiple members do the teasing.

(2007) Kiba and Naruto are rowdy hype men while the three members are more reserved, except when Sai does weird dances at select performances. Which is why when Kunoichi did their first performance ever at the KChart Music Awards, we can see Sasuke in this fancam (link) looking like he’s reprimanding Kiba, Naruto, and Sai because it distracts him from watching the girls (or just one girl?) perform.

(2010) This Kunoichi fancam from Konoha Music Awards in November (link) shows the girls standing while Rock Lee performs on stage. On Sakura’s side, you can see members of a boy group who keep moving and shuffling around. Another fancam (link) revealed that it was actually Kage members trying to switch places with each other.

So the member order was as follows: Tenten, Hinata, Ino, Sakura, Kiba, Sai, Sasuke, Naruto, Neji. When Kiba realized who he was next to, he walked away and tried to get in between Sasuke and Naruto. The two finally budged after a while, but Kiba was still unsatisfied because Sai was still between Sasuke and Sakura. So he went back and whispered something to Sai who promptly moved away and followed Kiba to stand between Naruto and Sasuke. Sasuke is now beside Sakura. Mission accomplished, guys.

(2011) In this Kunoichi fancam reaction to Kage’s stage on the KChart Music Awards (link), everyone was standing up. Unfortunately, the members were situated at the back, and Sakura, wearing combat boots, was at a height disadvantage. But the members came to her rescue when it was Sasuke’s turn in the spotlight. Ino who was the tallest member of the night thanks to her sky-high platforms, and Tenten the actual tallest member were whispering to Sakura, and looked like they were reporting and giving her a blow-by-blow account of what was happening on stage.

(2013) In this fancam of Kage’s reaction (link) to Sakura accepting the Best Female Solo for Courage at the Golden Leaf Awards, we see Naruto and Kiba who are smirking as they turn to a decidedly blank-faced Sasuke. Neji turns to their direction too, looking mildly exasperated.

tags: #masterpost, #Anonymous, #ask, #all of naruto’s teasing warrants a post of its own tbh

Anonymous asked: “#all of naruto’s teasing warrants a post of its own tbh” DUDE??!! please make that post a reality!! please!!!! i’ll give u my first born!! :)))

Haha! Okay, since there’s a bunch of you asking in my inbox: yes, the Naruto masterpost is underway. It’s gonna take a while but please look out for it if not by the end of this week then next week. Kinda swamped with work at the moment.

tags: #Anonymous, #ask

Anonymous asked: love you’re blog! :) Just wondering, who’s you’re bias in Kage??

Thanks! My bias is Neji because he’s the most fabulous.

tags: #Anonymous, #ask

Anonymous asked: hi!! do u have a link to the interview where they talk abt that line from shadows?? thanks

There were different articles with varying quotes from that interview (during SAGE album promotion, the one held in Konoha Mountain Villa back in March 2012) so I’m translating by combining the info from these articles: (x,x)

Q: Naruto, was the line “You are the sunshine in spring” from “Shadows” written for someone in particular?

Naruto: Uh, that’s— It’s not my place to say, sorry. Sasuke?

Sasuke: No comment.

Q: Is it perhaps about Hinata? She has the ‘sun’ character in her name.

Naruto: She does?

Sasuke: I wrote that line.

tags: #Anonymous, #ask

SS movie date in Wave Country (2012)

I just needed to update this post in light of new information.

In the Kage Konoha Mountain Villa interview 2012 (the one I linked in the previous post), Sasuke was recorded saying: “I like classic action movies. The most recent one I saw was In a Grove (藪の中 Yabu no Naka).”

Two months prior, Sakura uploaded a video of the instrumental ‘Prologue’ originally from the soundtrack of a film Rokurota. Both In a Grove and Rokurota are films by the director Makino Chikao which led people to speculate if the connection ends there or if there’s more. So I did a little investigating.

Sakura posted the video on the evening of 31 January 2012. During that time, Sakura was in Wave Country where she was a guest performer for Kage’s show in Sector D District. I searched the cinemas around that area and found one that at the time was having a director Makino Chikao retrospective. (You can check out their site here: link) I wasn’t able to see the list of films exhibited to confirm but I have no doubts that both In a Grove and Rokurota were screened there, especially since both films are critically-acclaimed and universally loved. And it’s likely that Sakura and Sasuke went to these screenings together.

Furthermore, you know what’s in front of Kaiza Theatre? An Owson grocery mart, aka the same one where those pictures of Sasuke and Sakura were taken the same year (link). See the side by side comparison (link) and note the same shelves and wall paint. And of course, those photos led to Danzo’s damage control denial of the dating rumors, and then Sasuke’s infamous “[KGE] is just a workplace” statement. Y’all know the rest.

tags: #text post

Anonymous: any opinions on danzo? lol

None. Hope he enjoys retirement.

tags: #Anonymous, #ask

yrzra asked: Hi! What’s your favorite Sakura era/hairstyle?

All Sakura is good Sakura to me! But if I have to pick one, I’d say when she came out with chin-length hair on her solo debut. It signified a new era, a new sound, and I was honestly blown away when I first saw it. That’s why it holds a special place in my heart.

tags: #yrzra, #ask, #little known fact: i prefer sakura’s solo songs, #but i still love kunoichi very much, #ino can step on my neck anytime

Anonymous asked: Wasn’t there an analysis of Heaven and Earth mv about Sakura’s romantic relationships? Or do you know the post I’m referring to?

Hm, sorry, I don’t remember that.

tags: #Anonymous, ask, #i personally don’t think it’s about her relationships at all?, #just about striving for self-improvement?, #which is a common theme in her lyrics

Masterpost of notable moments of Naruto being the SS fan club president

Note: As promised, here it is. If you have anything else to add, please don’t hesitate to reply/message me.

Let me preface this with a little background on Uzumaki Naruto. Naruto and Sasuke are the closest to each other in Kage not only because they are the two youngest members of the group, but also because they started training in KGE in the same year. The other trainee who started the same year they did was none other than Haruno Sakura. The three of them were said to be friendly even after they debuted in their respective groups. And it’s because of this that I believe they are privy to each other’s lives and relationships, and would, like any regular friends, every now and then tease the crap out of each other.

(2007) [VIDEO STAR] - Naruto talks about Kage members + colors 20070728

Naruto’s first solo guesting in Video Star variety talk show. There was a part where he was asked to describe the members of Kage via color association. (@ 2:11)

Izumu K: So black for Sai-kun, red for Kiba-kun, white for Neji-kun—

Naruto U: Yeah— Oh, no, not white. Ivory. Neji is very specific about this, you see.

Kotetsu H: Right, right.

Izumu K: What about Sasuke-kun?

Naruto U: Sasuke is... pink. Yeah. Pink. Pretty and memorable color. Lots of energy. (laughs)

Kotetsu H: Pink? For Uchiha Sasuke-kun? Really? Isn’t that a bit— (laughs)

Naruto U: Oh, you know what, scratch that. He’s gonna send me angry texts if he sees this. Okay, I’ll change it. Let’s see...

Kotetsu H: (laughs) Why would he?

Naruto U: Got it! Green. Nice, refreshing green.

Izumu K: Konoha green.

Naruto U: Yeah, yeah. Sure, green. (turns to the camera) I changed it, Sasuke! If you’re watching this, don’t be mad at me. (laughs)

Kotetsu H: Sasuke-kun, please take it easy on Naruto-kun.

Izumu K: Okay, what about you?

Naruto U: Orange, of course!

Pink is too obviously referring to Sakura/her signature hair color which is especially obvious since Kunoichi just debuted around the time of this interview, so Naruto changed it to green to prevent Sasuke’s wrath. But you know what else is green? Sakura’s eye color. Thanks, Naruto! Your subtlety is unparalleled.

(2007) KAGE reaction to KUNOICHI performance - MINDBLOWER + BLOOM @ Konoha Music Awards

Sasuke is a famously stoic cold city guy at award shows, especially when sat beside Naruto who dances exuberantly to every other performance. That is, until Kunoichi debuted. Sasuke would begin showing signs of life whenever Kunoichi performed, like foot tapping, some head bobbing here and there, and some stray finger flicking actions during the Mindblower chorus.

Anyway, in this particular performance, Naruto elbow nudges Sasuke on his side (pretty hardly, if Sasuke’s annoyed expression is anything to go by) just as Sakura’s verse is about to come on. (@ 1:32)

(2008) [FULL/ENG SUB] [HD] 080805 Idols Weekly EP 56 - KAGE Part 1

KAGE’s appearance in Idols Weekly where Naruto said he would join Kunoichi because his group kept betraying him, and then he said he would drag Sasuke along with him. He didn’t get to elaborate on why exactly because he was cut off by Sasuke’s glare.

Okay, this is kind of a reach but they were all just previously nailing the Bloom choreography, and then Naruto was dragging Sasuke specifically to join Kunoichi. Why just Sasuke? All of Kage are on friendly terms with Kunoichi members. That’s why I’m inclined to believe Naruto was teasing him because Sasuke has eyes on someone in Kunoichi. And we all know who.

(2009) [Music Bank K-Chart] 2nd Week of January - SN, Sound5

Sakura had the opportunity to host Music Bank for January. At the time, Sasuke and Naruto were promoting their subunit single “The Valley.” On the one episode that month where they performed, during the K-Chart announcement part, you can see Naruto subtly (not really) pushing Sasuke to his right. When the camera switches to wide shot, it appears that Sakura was on standby from hosting duties a few feet away over at Sasuke’s right side the whole time. (@9:42)

(2010) Sasuke was in Snow Country on a personal schedule and posted a rare picture of himself. Well, kind of. It was him looking like a hypebeast cryptid wearing multiple layers of winter clothes and scarves, against the backdrop of flower trees in Land of Spring (Snow Country’s capital). Captioned: ”wish you were here.” (My god he is so basic sometimes, I can’t.)

Anyway, on the said post, Naruto left a comment of around 15 cherry blossom emojis.

Cherry blossom = Sakura. King of subtlety…

Sasuke deletes this post five minutes later (which would have been suspect if he wasn’t such a serial post deleter). But luckily, we still have a screenshot which includes Naruto’s comment.

[IMAGE: @sasuke_deleted]

(Also note that a month prior to the announcement of their engagement, Sasuke and Sakura were reported to have had a rendezvous in Snow country. That place must be significant to them and Naruto being in their inner circle probably knows why this early on.)

(2010) [20102310] Naruto’s KLIVE Chat

Naruto was promoting his solo mini album and did a KLive broadcast where he called some Kage members. During his phone call with Sasuke, out of nowhere, Naruto mentioned Sakura. (@ 40:07)

N: Anyway, Sasuke, aren’t you preparing for your final show this week?

S: Mm.

N: All Kage members are supporting you. Not me, though. But the rest of them do, apparently.

S: Make yourself useful and promote my show.

N: I’ll do you one better. I’ll call Kunoichi and ask them to come to your concert.

S: What?

N: Yeah, I’ll personally pick Sakura-chan up and make sure she’s there.

S: [unintelligible]

N: Sasuke, what?

S: I said you’re an idiot.

(2011) Sakura was reported to have fainted from exhaustion after the last set at Kunoichi’s concert late October 2011. (This was the third time it had happened [that we know of!!!] and it honestly says a lot about what little regard KGE had for their artists.)

Meanwhile, Kage was doing their second to the last fanmeet scheduled in Earth Country. But on that night, Sasuke and Naruto took a red-eye from Iwa to Konoha. There are no pictures, only some K-netizens reports of Sasuke and Naruto entering Konoha General at around 8 am. (Some eyewitness accounts said that Sasuke appeared to be bringing a pillow.) At 10 am the same day, Naruto was spotted in his orange BMW convertible hanging around the KGE building, while Sasuke was nowhere in sight.

It can be surmised that Naruto, being a good friend, accompanied Sasuke so he can visit Sakura. But there’s more.

Konoha General to KGE building is a one-hour drive, but seeing how Naruto got his car and a new set of clothes, he most likely headed to his apartment first, which would add more or less 30 minutes to his journey. If he arrived at 8 am in Konoha General, but was already in KGE building by 10, that would mean he only stayed in the hospital for about 15 to 30 minutes at most.

I imagine what happened was: Naruto accompanied Sasuke from Iwa to Konoha, probably said hi to Sakura for a bit (if she was already conscious by then), and then promptly left them alone to have their moment. :’)

(2011) 30 October. Sasuke’s K-D Magazine photoshoot previews were released. Sakura liked one of the posts from the K-D account. Later, she posted a cute video selfie with heart eyes filter with ねぇ聞こえますか？(Can You Hear Me?) an old love song, playing in the background. Her timeline was probably filled with Sasuke’s pictures that she just had to post some kind of lovey-dovey reaction to it. A few hours later, Naruto commented with a (very knowing) smirking face emoji.

[IMAGE: @narukage_likes]

(2013) 8 August. Naruto posted a picture of two mochi (pink and blue) from Amaguriama, with the caption, “Look how sweet my friends are.” He tagged Sasuke in the blue one. Who else could the pink one be?

[IMAGE: @narukage]

That’s all I know for now. Naruto hasn’t updated his account with anything SS-related since the engagement was announced, which is really odd for him. (Maybe he’s still busy partying because his OTP is canon?) When he posts something, I’ll update this accordingly.

tags: #masterpost, #text post

bl00m asked: THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THAT MASTERPOST!! My life is significantly better because of it! But just wondering, since Sakura and Ino refer to themselves as best friends, do we have an Ino-teasing-Sakura-about-Sasuke moment, too?

Seems to me like Ino is much too professional to tease so I only found a couple. Hope that’s okay.

(2007) K-D Kunoichi Feature (magazine issue published around the time after Kunoichi’s debut):

Q: Out of the four of you, Ino and Sakura were the first ones to sign under KG and become trainees. What were your first impressions of each other? Has it changed now?

Sakura: I thought Ino was full of confidence and charisma and that hasn’t changed until now.

Ino: Sakura used to be really shy and quiet but clearly she has bloomed since then.

Sakura: Having someone my own age really helped, I think. We pushed each other to work and get better. It was kind of a friendly rivalry.

Ino: Yeah, rivalry, not just in terms of work, though. I used to have a crush on another trainee at that time, and then one day, Sakura announced that she—

Sakura: Oh my god! Can we not?

They didn’t outright say that it was Sasuke whom Sakura and Ino were crushing on, but it’s kind of general knowledge that Sasuke was quite popular with the KGE trainees not only because he was the younger brother of Akatsuki’s Uchiha Itachi but because he is good-looking and talented, so it’s not a stretch to assume Ino was talking about Sasuke and was teasing Sakura about it.

(2009) [VIDEO STAR] - Kunoichi (FULL EP) (@14:23):

Izumu: Any music you’re currently listening to?

Tenten: Believe it or not, I’ve been listening to a lot of trot music recently, like Might Guy, and stuff. I like the joy in it and I would like to also bring that kind of energy on stage someday.

Sakura: Creation , the album by Tsunade. I’m interested in albums that have some sort of narrative or a theme that makes everything cohesive, as opposed to trying to make hits after hits and then just compiling them all in the end. She’s certainly not the first to do something like it, but I thought it was groundbreaking for a pop artist, so…

Ino: We like Kage, too, don’t we, Sakura?

Tenten: (laughs)

Sakura: I— Well, everyone likes Kage for sure.

Kotetsu: Right, you did collaborate with them on a song in their album last year.

Sakura: Yeah.

Ino: (quietly) Is that what the kids call it these days?

Tenten: (laughs)

That innuendo, though.

tags: #bl00m, #ask

Anonymous asked: it’s funny reading your posts now and realizing how much it all makes sense like how did no one else (but us) seE THIS COMING??? we’ve endured being called DELUSIONAL for years!!!! i feel so vindicated now so i’m literally never gonna shut up about this LMAO

RIGHT?! I’m sure I’m not the only one who has remained quiet and kept to myself when I’m with other fans because I’m in the minority for shipping Sasuke and Sakura while most of them shipped the boys with each other. I don’t really mind it, but, you know, when it’s real, IT’S REAL.

And it feels so good to be right.

tags: #Anonymous, #ask

Anonymous asked: how’s life for a grown ass adult still projecting on other people’s relationships like ur 13 lmfao

How’s life for someone who has to type with only 2 brain cells?

tags: #Anonymous, #ask

kageyah asked: gawd, what a rude anon that was. don’t let those lowlifes bother you. i’ve been enjoying your recent posts a lot and it’s so fun to see you back again on my dashboard. i missed you sm. ^_^

Kags!! Thank you! I missed you, too! Nah, don’t worry. Sasuke and Sakura are getting married so I’m unfazed and unbothered by virtually anything. Haha!

tags: #kageyah, #ask

lildonut: i love your blog!!!! that masterpost gave me life!!! i was wondering if you have any fic recs?? Thanks <3

Thank you! I don’t really read fics, sorry. I have a very little scope of imagination so reality is enough to keep me interested. But maybe someone here can help you? Anyone?

edit: Thanks, @darliang!!

These, our bodies, possessed by light by RikkudoS — “‘Tell me we’ll never get used to it.’ Sasuke and Sakura through the years. Canon.”

Cherry Bombs by xXxFullMoonxXx — “Double dates are easy enough. That is, until you end up falling for the wrong person. High School AU.”

Of Demos and First Kisses by sugimura — "5 times Sasuke and Sakura wrote songs together and the 1 time they didn’t. Canon."

Under the Same Sky by msshkshmt — “Uchiha Sasuke expects to die in battle. But seeing this pink-haired girl cry for him (again and again), makes him wish that wasn’t the case. Ninjas AU.”

tags: #lildonut, #ask, #fic recs

Anonymous asked: Do you have any idea as to when and how exactly Sasuke and Sakura started dating? Other than the 5 years that Sasuke mentioned in his fan page message? Thanks! Love your blog!

Thanks!

By the way, I love how Sasuke is known to be very private with his personal life and relationships but would, intentionally or not, obliquely reveal details like how they’ve been dating for 5 years already.

Anyway. Well, I can’t really say anything with certainty but if I were to extrapolate and make an *educated guess*, I’d say they probably started dating officially mid to late 2009. As far as I can recall, that’s also when dating gossips about them started popping up. Also the fact that they started wearing matching white gold bands late ‘09-early ‘10 (I’ll make a separate post about this later) just solidified to me that they really did start dating in 2009.

Prior to my projected time, their collaborations have been frequent, starting with Sakura helping to write a song for Kage, and then both of them being featured on each other’s solo projects. And even before that, it’s kind of general knowledge that they’ve been fairly close as trainees (not to mention, Sakura has allegedly been crushing on him before), so they already had that foundation. There’s that mutual respect for each other and each other’s talents that, over the course of their collaborations, probably grew into something more.

tags: #Anonymous, #ask

Anonymous: re: how sasuke and sakura started dating, i would also like to add that since they are the most hardworking out of the members of their respective groups, they are probably the trainees who used to work overtime the most and got close because of it, probably helped and looked out for each other too. sakura used to say dancing wasn’t her strongest suit while it came naturally for sasuke so maybe he helped her with that. conversely, since sakura is reportedly an A+ student, she must’ve helped him with studies as well. they probs already have a mutual understanding but couldn’t be official cuz of the dating ban. ^_^

Ah, I’m actually not entirely sure if the dating ban is real, but what you’ve said is possible. Can’t say anything conclusively, though.

tags: #Anonymous, #ask

Anonymous asked: wher do sassuke and saura have sex???

How tf would I know lol

tags: #Anonymous, #ask

List of alleged Sasuke x Sakura couple items

These are only the more important, more unique items. So don’t bother sending me pictures of them holding identical paper bags from Sannin. They aren’t the only idols who shop from that brand.

***

(2009-2010) White gold band

Sasuke is not that big on accessories. If we do see him fully accessorized, it’s because he is styled for promotional materials, and stage or music video looks. Otherwise, he doesn’t wear much accessories other than a standard watch, etc. That’s why it was so glaringly obvious when he started wearing a white gold band on his left pinky finger (note: pinky = pink = Sakura, lol!) in December 2009, which led fans to speculate if he is in a relationship. Everyone was suddenly on the lookout for a similar ring worn by idols and celebrities. Especially Sakura whom Sasuke was rumored to be dating that year.

Sakura accessorizes quite a bit but has never been seen wearing the said band. That is, until she had a fan meet in March of 2010. Sakura fansite First Love took HQ pictures of her in the event. In one of them, she leaned over while signing an autograph for a fan and consequently revealed the necklace she’s wearing inside her blouse, and behold, the white gold band hanging on it. It took quite a lot zooming in and adjusting the photograph which is why the legitimacy was contentious among fans, but you can see it for yourself here.

[IMAGE: White gold band]

[IMAGE: Sasuke Konoha airport pic white gold band]

[IMAGE: Sakura necklace zoom in]

***

(2011) Chair

Sakura posts a picture of her succulents by the window of her house, the chair from Sasuke’s Heavenly Hand music video is seen in the corner. It’s a one-of-a-kind modern chair by Konoha master carpenter Kanna, so it couldn’t have been a duplicate.

[IMAGE: MV screenshot]

[IMAGE: @sakurah]

***

(2012-2013) Ceramic vase

Sasuke posted a picture of a Hanasaki-style ceramic vase by Masho’s protégé ceramist, Kanyu, which was exhibited and auctioned at Leaf Gallery, and captioned it (now deleted) “Mine.”

[IMAGE: @sasuke_deleted]

The following year, Sakura posted a photo of her bed after a concert tour with the caption “Home Sweet Home.” On the bookshelf on the right side, the same vase is seen. Note the pure white color and cracks on the surface that resemble intertwining flowers.

[IMAGE: @sakurah]

Did he give it to her or was she able to procure an identical one? I’m inclined to believe in the former, but either way, cute.

***

(2013) Chambray shirt

Sakura was photographed at Konoha airport wearing a chambray shirt, which is similar to a shirt that Sasuke was wearing in the behind-the-scenes photo of his album back in 2009. The shirts have an identical tear at the left collar.

According to fashion fansite SakuraCloset, this shirt is from Sannin Men’s chambray shirt. This is how it originally looked on the runway. No tear.

[IMAGE: Sannin RTW F/W 2006]

So it’s either a huge coincidence that Sasuke and Sakura have identical tears on the same brand of shirt, or it’s just the same shirt that they share for some reason*.

*They were dating.

tags: #masterpost, #text post

Anonymous asked: you forgot the beanie that often sasuke wears at airports which was spotted worn by sakura.

You mean in the Road of Life webisode from last year? No, it’s the same color but they’re different. Sakura was wearing a fisherman beanie, while Sasuke usually wears a slouchy one.

tags: #Anonymous, #ask

mindbl0wn: do you know what the strong 100 will be about? Love ur blog ^_^

Sorry, it took a while to answer this. According to these articles (x,x), it’s gonna be a heist film with an all-female cast. Sakura’s appearance will be brief (a cameo maybe?) but apparently she does her own stunts.

tags: #that’s my girl, #mindbl0wn, #ask

Anonymous asked: lol i still keep seeing antis tryna say sakura might be doing it for attention and sasuke is just pity marrying her or using her as a beard to cover up another relationship or sth man i can’t with them anymore

I really worry about people who spread stuff like this. Like, please give your faves the credit they deserve!

Sasuke “ I-take-relationships-very-seriously” Uchiha marrying someone for shits? They can’t even make him forego his IG feed aesthetic to promote his group/members’ stuff, let alone force him to marry someone out of pity or publicity or whatever.

And Sakura. Why would she marry for publicity? She’s already famous and influential on her own, and not to mention, rich from all the songwriting royalties among other things. She doesn’t need clout. Least of all from Sasuke or the Uchiha. Like 90% of the hate directed towards her come from ugly Sasuke/Hoekage stans and weirdos who have conglomerate boners. She need not subject herself to all that.

They are also, by the way, at the height of their respective careers. If they cared all that much about their image, wouldn’t they wait until they’re in their early 30s to marry like most idols? They could potentially be throwing away endorsement deals from brands who prefer celebrities who are single to appease the fans who feel like they have some sort of ownership towards idols.

And yet! And yet despite everything, they chose to make their relationship public in their own terms.

(Also, note the timing of their announcement. It’s a few months after Hatake Kakashi became the new CEO. It’s like the management up until then has been the main reason that has kept them from coming out with their relationship, which is why the ‘secrecy’ of it felt kinda half-hearted and they’ve been [knowingly or not] dropping hints.)

Clearly, they just didn’t care and they couldn’t wait to spend the rest of their lives married to each other. It’s not that deep. You don’t have to like it. But if you love them as you claim, then respect their decision and stop spreading rumors like that.

tags: #Anonymous, #ask

WAIT WHAT

tags: #text post

OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD

tags: #IS THIS REAL, #AM I DREAMING, #GUYS!!!!!!!!!!, #text post

THEY REALL YDID IT OH MY GODD!!!!11 ;;;

tags: #text post

Un-Follow Me Now, This Is Gonna Be the Only Thing I Post About For The Next Week. Ive Wanted This For Years Fuck. What The Fuck.

tags: #text post

Anonymous: Lol theres still a few months before the wedding date so they might still cancel it and break up lmfao xD

I delayed answering this to avoid jinxing it but guess what, babe:

BREAKING: UCHIHA SASUKE AND HARUNO SAKURA OFFICIALLY GET MARRIED

July 17, 2014

Uchiha Sasuke and Haruno Sakura have made it official!

Yesterday, the two were reportedly spotted at the Konoha offices to file for their marriage registration. On July 17, the two officially got married in a private ceremony.

The couple initially announced their engagement last March, with the wedding that was supposed to be held November 5 later this year.

Representatives say that the newlywed couple “opted for a small and private wedding along with their loved ones, in favor of donating the expenses that was supposed to be for their ceremony to the pediatric ward of Konoha General Hospital.”

Uchiha Sasuke is best known as a member and the primary lyricist of boy group Kage under KG Entertainment. Haruno Sakura is known as a member of girl group Kunoichi under the same company. Both have gone on to have successful solo careers.

Congratulations to the happy couple!

source: knewsdaily

tags: #Anonymous, #ask

Sasuke and Sakura: We will get married on November 5 this year.

Also, Sasuke and Sakura: sothatwasafuckinglie.jpg

tags: #WHEN WILL THEY LET ME LIVE!!!!!, #text post

I’M SHAKINGG;;

tags: #REFRESHING EVERY 30 SECS FOR UPDATES, #text post

SAKURA IS SO BEAUTIFUL

tags: #THAT’S IT, #THAT’S THE POST, #text post

Attendees’ social media posts (so far)

Kakashi: posted a photo of the still empty venue, but everything is prepared already. The flower ceiling is especially striking. (There appears to be not more than 30 chairs for the guests. I guess it really is a small wedding.)

“I’m on time for once. #SasuSakuCouple #AmIDoingThisRight #lol”

[IMAGE: @kh_tactics]

Ino: posted picture of Sakura holding a bouquet of Baby’s Breath flowers, smiling contently.

“My baby girl is married! I’m so emotional right now and can’t even form a proper message. I’m proud to have seen you blossom right before my eyes, and I feel lucky to get to call you my best friend. I wish you all the happiness in the world. I love you!”

[IMAGE: @xxinoxx]

Sai: posted a video of Naruto and Kiba having a dance showdown at the reception.

“#lit”

[IMAGE: @sai_00]

Hinata: posted a picture of the flower arrangement at the table.

“Congrats”

[IMAGE: @hinata_hyuuga_official]

Kiba: posted a group selfie of the Kage boys being rowdy, Sasuke and Neji looking unimpressed in the back.

[IMAGE: @kibakage]

Tenten: posted a group selfie of Kunoichi being cute.

[IMAGE: @10ten]

Neji: posted a photoset of miscellaneous aesthetics of the wedding (floral ceiling, the food, the lights, details of Sakura’s veil), and a selfie.

“S/S 2014”

[IMAGE: @neji_]

Itachi : posted (1) a photoset of the groom’s and bride’s parents—first photo is a formal one, on the second one, they’re doing finger hearts.

“#familyphoto”

(2) a picture of the silhouettes of Sasuke and Sakura facing each other, seemingly in a happy conversation.

[IMAGE: @itachiuchiha]

tags: #no update from naruto yet, #king of being late, #masterpost, #text post

I know it’s a private affair and I respect that but...

But would it seriously be too much to ask for a proper picture of the newlyweds??

tags: #i love you itachi-nii but what the heck was that??, #do you need your eyes checked perhaps?, #or am i too pedestrian to appreciate the high art-ness of it, #probably that, #in any case: i need the pics PLEASE, #i’ve been a good person, #i deserve this, #text post

Anonymous: do think it’s possibel that sakura is pregnant that’s why they were so quick to marry. Pls reply

Highly unlikely. She would’ve been showing by now and looking at the photos we’ve seen, her stomach is very much flat. Moreover, she was just shooting an action movie where she does her own stunts. You think they’d allow a pregnant woman to do that?

tags: #Anonymous, #ask

Anonymous: YO DID YOU SEE SAKURA’S UPDATE JUST NOW?!?!??!!111

YES!!!! I’m translating it but I’m trying to wait if Sasuke posts something so I can translate that too and (rightfully) post them together.

tags: #Anonymous, #ask

SASUKE

tags: #text post

Sakura and Sasuke post-wedding social media updates

Sakura posted a pic of their hands with the rings, a bouquet of flowers visible on the side, with the caption:

“Today we got married.

We had deviated from our original plan because we wanted to do something meaningful and more like us. As a result, we have decided to just keep the ceremony quiet but, rest assured, full of love.

I’ve never felt so loved as I do at this moment and that’s in huge part because of all of you who have been congratulating us warmly, and have been so patient and understanding of our decisions every step of the way.

Please continue to look kindly upon us as husband and wife. Thank you.

- Sakura“

[IMAGE: @sakurah]

Sasuke, of course, never does what you expect so he didn’t post a message. Instead, he cleared out three rows of his feed with plain white tiles to have a single picture of Sakura looking beautiful in her wedding dress in the middle. The colored picture especially stands out in his generally grayscale feed.

Moreover, he is now following 1 account: @sakurah.

[IMAGE: @sasuke]

tags: #text post

Masterpost of notable moments of Naruto being the SS fan club president

Note: As promised, here it is. If you have anything else to add, please don’t hesitate to reply/message me.

EDIT: Naruto posted a photoset: (1) the newlyweds smiling arm in arm, Sasuke gazing warmly at Sakura, (2) same as the first but they’re looking at each other and smiling, (3) Naruto gets in the picture to pose with the two.

“Why I believe in love”

[IMAGE: @narukage]

Tags: #MY JOB HERE IS DONE, #update, #masterpost, #text post

END

#apparently u can't underline on tumbl......#so maybe reading on ao3 is cuter but do whatever u please #fic poop #kpop au #this is uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh #sasusaku

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theliterarywolf · 5 years

Text

So, Let’s Talk ‘Love Death and Robots (Episodes 10-18)

Hey guys, I finally decided to finish off my write-up on Netflix's Love Death and Robots, even though I hope that anyone who wanted to give the show a chance has by now. If you need a bit more coaxing, I covered the first 9 episodes here (you can also find my rating system explained there) and I go over the last 9 episodes here.

Oh, also... I know that there's the whole 'Netflix arranges to episode order based on your sexual orientation' thing going on. Even though I think that's kind of bunk because I don't recall Netflix sending me an email to ask 'Hey, so... can we know if you're straight or not?'

I’m going by the episodic order on my first and second viewings.

Let's get started.

Episode 10 – Shape-Shifters

I know people have been making the jokes of 'Lol, who was the closeted gay Republican furry who wrote this short~?” But, God, can... Can we please get more domestic supernatural pieces like this?

Homoerotic subtext or not, watching this story reminded me of one of my grievances whenever I try to wade through the muck and the mire that is the Kindle Store: that being, in regards to MLM writing, you're either a cowboy or a werewolf.

And no one does anything unique with writing gay cowboys or gay werewolves. It's always 'I'm a closeted, homophobic son of a bitch who needs my heart melted by the northern newcomer and their high-falutin' ways' or 'we're werewolves so we have to live by A/B/O-Omegaverse rules, I guess???'

The execution of this story, the melding of fantasy and the real world is something that I like to see in media but, more than often, is shat out into a mess of awkward writing and characters. I'm looking at you, Bright.

Did it Have a Robot – Yes? Or No?

No, this is more of a fantasy, horror, military-drama combo that does wonders.

Could this Stand Its Own as a Feature Film/TV Series?

I mean, with Teen Wolf gone and Supernatural on its way out, I think a fully-developed series leading up to the short that we get here, talking about the main two characters growing up as werewolves and how the world treats them would have a great place in prime-time.

Episode 11 – Helping Hand

127 Hours, eat your fucking heart out! I felt more from this one short about suffering and sacrificing for the sheer essence of surviving the insurmountable than I did with the whole of 127 Hours. Which is kind of bad considering how the latter is based on an actual true story.

Did it Have a Robot – Yes? Or No?

The main reason the main character has to do what she does is because she's doing maintenance on a space-station.

Could this Stand Its Own as a Feature Film/TV Series?

I think this stands better on its own as is.

Episode 12 – Fish Night

(No Gif for this one. Pity...)

Allow me a second.

…

Okay.

If you've ever watched something like Disney's Fantasia or James Cameron's Avatar (Disclaimer – If anyone tries to insinuate that I would ever put Avatar on the same level as any Disney film in terms of quality/re-watchability, I will slap you), you get the sentiments of: 'this exists to be a very, fancy, elegant tech-demo. I know I shouldn't think about story, but I am, and all I see is a very fancy tech-demo'.

That's the notion one gets with Fish Night. Another 2D addition to LDaR, the story of two business men stranded in a desert and the beauty of the natural world of past and present is visually stunning but, as soon as that night falls, you're going to know exactly what is happening for the rest of the story.

But it sure is pretty, though!

Did it Have a Robot – Yes? Or No?

Nope. It was just really pretty.

Could this Stand Its Own as a Feature Film/TV Series?

Nope. It's just really pretty.

Episode 13 – Lucky 13

The second of the stories in LDaR that has a 'last-stand' tilt, even though it doesn't kick in until the end. However, before that, I really enjoy what is another story with a legitimately strong female character, who also happens to be a woman of color, who comes up from the adversity of being a novice pilot and being given an airship with the most unfortunate of reputations to manage.

The relationship between the main character and the ship 'Lucky 13' is really what makes this story stand out.

Which... is ultimately bad for the story that rounds out the collection. But, that will come later.

Did it Have a Robot – Yes? Or No?

The characters are essentially space-marines and they drive around in airships, what more do you need?

Could this Stand Its Own as a Feature Film/TV Series?

Maybe a feature film. But it would have to devote every minute of a film's run-time to developing the universe and personalities of the human characters.

Episode 14 – Zima Blue

Admittedly, this one managed to keep me in suspense until the focus of the story first made himself visible. After that, we're taken on a minute trip through the phenomena of true talent, existentialism, and the concept of joy and self.

And... that's all I will say on that one.

Did it Have a Robot – Yes? Or No?

Ooh, does this one have a robot...

Could this Stand Its Own as a Feature Film/TV Series?

You know, this one is a bit tricky. Maybe not a feature-length film but not pulled out into a TV series either. A thirty-minute short film, perhaps, would let the setting and artwork shine more.

Episode 15 – Blindspot

(No Gif again...)

You know, I keep forgetting that this one exists. It's not even that it was bad, it just...

Okay, so I watch a review channel on YouTube from time to time called “Double Toasted” and, even though I don't agree with about 75% of their stance on LDaR, what they said about this one was pretty spot on.

It's reminiscent of the classic Saturday Morning Cartoons of the 80s... Just with more swearing and death.

Because, yeah, this story follows a team of multi-colored androids driving EXTREME! vehicles while trying to steal a secret computer-chip from a carrier convoy. And all of the androids represent a common character trope seen in those sorts of cartoons: the Cool Dude leader, the brawny idiot, the smart-talking girl, and the green-behind-the-ears junior character.

I actually liked the animation to this one but story-wise it really is just your EXTREME! Saturday Morning cartoon with cursing and violence.

Did it Have a Robot – Yes? Or No?

Yeah, the entire cast.

Could this Stand Its Own as a Feature Film/TV Series?

Maybe a TV series... Ooh, especially if it was done by someone like Christy Karacas (Superjail! and BallMasterz: 9009)

Episode 16 – Ice Age

(I should probably come to the conclusion that no one on this site cared enough about these last few shorts...)

Okay, this one I feel cheated in order to be included in here because it honestly feels so out of place. You get to follow a new, quirky couple moving into their first place together and, whoa-oh! They find an old freezer and decide to look inside to decide whether or not they should keep it!

… And, inside, is a micro-ecosystem that shows the entire past, present, and future of the human-race before blazing out in a fluorescent heat-death in front of their eyes.

All while said quirky couple makes commentary on what they're seeing.

I still don't know what animation was used for a good portion of the freezer-scenes. Was it CG combined with scaled-down camera or what?

Did it Have a Robot – Yes? Or No?

Tech... nically...

Could this Stand Its Own as a Feature Film/TV Series?

Oh, honey, no... A feature-length film of this would be on the same level of all of those ironic romcoms we got in that painful period of the early 2000s and a TV series of this would be canceled after three episodes.

Episode 17 – Alternate Histories

Look, I get where people come from with Alternate Histories: 'this one was goofy', 'it ran a bit too long', 'fake news'. And, honestly, when the title first showed up on my screen, I was cringing because I was sure they were going to spend 8 or 10 minutes of talking about a certain annoying pumpkin man.

However, I actually had fun with this one. Yeah, it seems like the flow and writing seems more like it would be at home on something like Robot Chicken at times, but I still liked it.

Besides, we get to watch a little Cartoon Hitler being killed over and over and over. What's not to like?

Did it Have a Robot – Yes? Or No?

The Alternate History software in of itself is reminiscent to your 'what-if' tropes in science fiction. Just condensed and split apart into a few different scenarios.

Could this Stand Its Own as a Feature Film/TV Series?

I couldn't see a full film or series of this working but maybe, like I said, if an entire episode of something like Robot Chicken was just dedicated to making up a dozen different ways to kill Hitler, that would be pretty interesting to watch.

Episode 18 – The Secret War

This, I feel, is the true casualty of LDaR. Not because it's bad on a technical level, it's actually visually stunning. Not because it's bad on a story-telling level, the writing is actually solid.

No, the main fault of The Secret War... Is that it is the last story in LDaR.

That it's the THIRD 'Last-Stand' story we've seen in an anthology of 18 different stories. I can understand the team behind LDaR wanting to have something like this be its finisher because, as I said, the art direction and writing behind it are really worthy of some fine cinema.

But it would have been better for everyone involved if they had swapped this one's position with something like Zima Blue or Lucky 13. By this point in watching the series, you're kind of reflecting on the darker stories but appreciating the lighter ones as well. So you'd want something with a little bit of hope to finish things off with.

And, trust me: those who know me know that I'm a proponent of 'more dark stories in media/not everything needs a happy ending'. This one just needed to be earlier in the anthology because, oof, I just was not able to get invested in the characters and their struggle. You know that it's not going to end well, you're just watching characters march towards their deaths.

And, again, this would have been fine... Had it been episode 6 or 8. But, no, this is how we decide to end off this cavalcade of high-concept art.

Think back to Night on Bald Mountain from the Original Fantasia. Yes, the initial orgy of horror and fright from Chernabog and his minions is a decadent display but a lot of its weight and impact would have been lost if the film just ended with that. That's why having the brief ending of the Ave Maria segment works: to keep things balanced so that everything in Fantasia can be appreciated in checks and balances.

LDaR unfortunately didn't have that foresight. So, what should have been a feast feels more like a push to get through.

Did it Have a Robot – Yes? Or No?

No, this was one of the fantasy/horror pieces.

Could this Stand Its Own as a Feature Film/TV Series?

Honestly, I'm not sure. Maybe a feature-length film just so that the universe and characters can present themselves on their own, rather than having to bear the weight of being the big finisher to the impact of 17 other stories. But it would still be a risk.

So, those are my thoughts on Love Death and Robots. Personally, I would LOVE for there to be a season 2 of this with more writers involved so we can get an overall more distinct portfolio of writing approaches (as well as maybe serve as a springboard for up-and-coming writers, hm..?)

I do acknowledge the risk of making something like this a yearly thing (many critics of Black Mirror insist that the series' recent low-points are due to the writers having to constantly come back and try to one-up their poignancy), but I think the risks would be dealt with if, again, more writers were allow to join in.

Oh well, feel free to tell me how you felt and what your personal favorites were. Thanks for reading and have a good one!

#Wolf Watches #love death and robots

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smoochews · 6 years

Note

what are your favorite writers and your top favorite works from them?? like a top ten

I saw this ask in the middle of work and I wanted to scream aksldfjalks I’m gonna tell you rn that I got really overwhelmed with the amount of authors that have earned a spot in my top favs that I actually cut this to just the authors that I have most recently visited (this counts as returning multiple times to reread a certain fic… which happens… a lot)

@arckook Ria is one of the first authors I ever read from for k-pop fanfiction. Until Ria, I was just highkey on that Haikyuu volleyball gays/imagines and I’d like to believe that she was one of the main reasons why I began to invest myself heavily into the kpop fandom. I’m always amazed with each piece she releases. Her style is so unique and hypnotizing. There’s a big section in my heart reserved just for Ria that I don’t have enough words to convey. plz support. plz love. she’s the best

- To The Stars (Jungkook, BTS): Zombie Apocalypse AU, Enemies to Lovers AU, series, violence, angst, drama

This read is not for the light hearted. You have been warned. You will sob hysterically. You will feel rage seep into your bones. You will punch a hole in your screen. MC is an entire badass, but so broken and vulnerable; somehow she manages to keep herself together and carry on. Even when she hates Jungkook with every cell in her body, she makes sure to keep him alive, watch his six, just as he does for her. There’s only a handful of works that have kept me as heavily invested and on my toes every step of the way. And that list begins with To The Stars

@brokeandjetlagged I cannot tell you how many times I’ve made a fool out of myself in public while reading Bailey’s work…. like lord help me I can’t stay in my chair…

- We Take A Shot (Baekhyun, EXO): Office AU, boss!Baekhyun, one-shot, fluff

Even after re-reading it 2-3 times, I cannot help the obnoxious laughter escaping my mouth….sounding something along the lines of a screeching seagull. Dorky Baekhyun trying to be Mr. Businessman really killed me. LIKE PLZ THE HOVER BOARD asdfjsj I’m laughing just thinking about it

- Hurt Me, Heal Me (Yixing, EXO): Hospital AU, nurse!Yixing, one-shot, fluff

Honestly, I would pay to be Baekhyun in that moment. Someone kick me in the face if that meant I could spend some time with nurse Yixing. He’s so adorable and I highly relate to MC being a mess when he thinks that she’s Baek’s girlfriend. Overall, this fic makes my heart go kyuu~

- Bromance .2 (Minseok, EXO) : College AU, frat!Minseok, enemies to lovers AU, series (ish), fluff, smut, drama

enemies to lovers…. honestly I’m not entirely sure of what to say other than that you should read it

@sehun-smut ngl. one of the reasons, besides me passing out, that this rec list took so long to make is bc I stopped to re-read both of these fics…. no ragrats… I don’t think you’ll understand until you read all of their work… so like… you know what to do…

- Business in the Front (Baekhyun,EXO): Restaurant AU (ish), one-shot, smut

Older Baekhyun is a kink okay. I’ve never wanted to call someone daddy more in my life than while reading this fic… and like to begin with it’s hard for me to imagine Baek being zaddy, so that should say A LOT.

- Deceitful (Chanyeol, EXO) - Mafia AU, series, smut, violence

I think this is the first honeytrapper fic I’ve ever read in my life. I mean I was aware of the job description but not the actual title. I must say I’m thoroughly aroused and equally terrified.

@exhoe-imagines I really adore Ruby and Jewels. Like, they’re so funny and interactive with their followers; and their content is always breath taking. highkey power couple energy

- Can’t Hold Back (Jongdae, EXO): Enemies to Lovers AU, one-shot, smut, drama, slight angst

You already know Jongdae is fucked the minute he sees MC’s bathing suit on the ground while she’s in the pool. You already know that when he went home that evening, his meat was begging for mercy by the end of the night. jfladskjf okay I’m gross, I know, but carrying on– the growth between Jongdae’s and MCs relationship is really heartwarming. Could not have asked for more from this fic

- Lucky (Baekhyun + Chanyeol, EXO): College AU, one-shot, smut

So…. let’s talk about the elephant in the room… or should we say two? bc there is definitely more than one trunk for MC to handle… so…. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH GET WREKT MC

@yehet-me-up I will never not be in love with Sarah. Her Exodus Mall series really takes me back home. Often times when I’m feeling down and sick, I return to Sarah’s page and re-read that series. To say the least, I find home in Sarah’s writing.

- The Problem With Wanting (Kyungsoo, EXO): Mall AU, series, fluff, slight angst, smut

listen to this song and just take it in…. I think this was the first fic I read from the Exodus series and it will always hold a special place in my heart. This fic in particular is what I find myself coming back to again and again, time after time, and I always feel renewed. I feel youthful. More like… you know that feeling you get when you realize you’re falling in love with someone? That’s this. Please read. Please.

- Disqualified (Kyungsoo, EXO): Friends to Lovers AU, one-shot, angst, fluff

Imagine twisting a knife in your gut and slowly removing it through the opposite side of your body. That’s this fic. But like. With love. askdjflksjd I really love the way Sarah portrays Kyungsoo. Her descriptions of his thoughts, mannerisms and quirks make me feel like I’m watching a movie. Everything is so distinct and the atmosphere feels tangible. idk words. I just love Sarah.

@snakescript I don’t know too much about this author but I’m totally and completely enamored with their writings.

- Make The Devil Cry (Taeyong, NCT) : College AU, one-shot, light angst, smut

I’m weak for the “playboy” tamer… and tbh I feel like this would be Taeyong irl. Hard and complex to the eyes of an observer, but a major softy and sweet pea to the eyes of a listener. I’m upset of how little attention this fic has bc the world is really missing out on a diamond.

- Face Like Thunder (Chanyeol, EXO): Mythology/Greek God AU, one-shot, light angst, fluff

I would like to file a complaint. My heart is crying and my love for Chanyeol is soaring and I’m ACHE FOR THE MAN. Lmao I’m not even a Chanyeol stan but this fic got me thinkin’

@johobi you can always count on Jo to make you cream your pants in the middle of Target (stay away from the baby section kids)

- Bloom / Snared (Yoonji/Yoongi, BTS): Mafia AU, smut

honestly, Yoonji can wipe the floor with my body, in pool of my own blood, and I would thank her. I really really love the way Jo depicts Yoonji here. I can just feel that fem fetal power and that in itself got me ruining my underwear.

- Tooth and Claw (Jungkook, BTS) : Werewolf AU, smut

I’ve never related to furry more in my life than while I read this fic. high key wanna be rawed and torn in half by his king kong schlong … idk how MC survived, but she’s my idol.

- Dig Deep + Interval (Yoongi, BTS): Space AU, smut

I’m ngl. I really went to Pornhub and looked up tentacle porn after reading this. Y’all can @ me, roast me if you like,,,, but you’re a got-damn liar if you say this doesn’t get your blood pumping. p sure I wrote this on my tags but i didn’t even know I liked tentacle porn until then…. I hate myself

@bread-jinie idk where to start…. there are so many things I can say about Kat…… im tongue-tied….

- Wings (Chanyeol, EXO): Friends to Lovers AU, angst, fluff

I think this fic is my favorite work Kat has written so far. It’s like she knows the right words to tug the strings of my heart and play me like a puppet. A heartbroken but hopeful puppet. MC and Chanyeol always looking at each other but never at the same time breaks me; thankfully, the ending patches me back together.

Honorable mentions bc I’ve grown v tired and cannot continue with full details for info regarding everything, in addition to the fact that I’m inpatient and I want to post this ASAP:

@kollectionn GOD SENT. DO NOT PLAY AROUND. YOUR LIFE WILL CHANGE. YOU WILL NEVER BE THE SAME. THE WORLD WILL END AS YOU KNOW IT. THEN BE REBORN FROM THE ASHES AS C WILLS IT SO. (sorry for the all caps but I feel INTENSELY about C and her works of art; If I can recall correctly, I believe she said that she would begin to write her own non-fanfic when she finds the time. I think she has the power and ability to write best selling novels that would leave J.K. Rowling quaking in her boots. Plz go and love C. Don’t ask for updates. Just show her all the love she deserves and more; I haven’t been lately and I feel terrible for it; I hope she knows I love her!!!)

@dropsofletters lemme tell you somm’… this author is so talented and diverse in her work that I find myself scattered with the amounts of fandom’s she holds in her clutch. I’m so thankful to have found her page on this godforsaken website bc she caters so much to this world. Talented. Spectacular. Amazing. Blessing to Society. I don’t think I’ve found any multi-fandom writers that has spread out as far as she has. She’s one of those authors that has exactly what you’re looking for, even if you don’t know what it is. An Angel.

@layhyunnie beautiful. ethereal. whimsical. Inspiring. I mean literally inspiring. I wrote a few drabbles after reading Guardian bc I wanted to try and bring to life a world outside of our own, to step outside reality, just like I felt while reading their work.

- Guardian (Yixing, EXO): Supernatural AU, series, fluff

Again… I’m v tired… so here’s a short list of authors I meant to add here, along with their fics/full details of why I love them:

@knockknocksoosthere / @underthejoon @marshmallow-phd @kpopfanfictrash @yeolology @yeolology @whimsical-ness @remembeo @lofiexo @nochugguk @noona-clock @noonachronicles @oilblotter @soobadnoonecanstopher

((If you would like to know more about my interests in the unfinished authors, or any authors above for that matter, then please leave me an ask!! I will answer them when I am no longer tired akjsjdf I cannot reply via chat as this is only a side blog))

#i hate u anon #did u really wanna kill me #jk sjfdsdjf #i cant hate u #i hope you like it ;;#also at all the authors i've reblogged from... you are my favorite.... im just v tired and only have 2 brain cells left #paep speaks #asks #anon #exo #bts #exo fic recs #bts fic recs

169 notes · View notes

i-write-shakespeare-not-disney · 6 years

Text

Fragile Hearts Ch. 10- When I’m With You

Click the OP (Original post) if the READ MORE link does not show!

THANK YOU TO @bluejayb1rd FOR COMMISSIONING!!! Two out of four! <3

Click Here for Chapter 1

Click Here for Chapter 9

Fragile Hearts Playlist here

AO3 Link: Chapter: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11928798/chapters/38455013 Full Story: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11928798

Aside from a couple nightmares in the past few nights, it was relaxing being able to be in Vegas with Matt and Hunk. It felt good not to stress over school for a bit, and it felt good not to be alone.

It also hadn’t been the last time Pidge ended up staying at Hunk’s. Lance took to using the couch when he found the two of them cuddled up on the couch a second night. Sharing his bed also meant he didn’t wake her when he left for work.

After a nightmare, Pidge woke up to an empty bed and the sound of scratching at the bedroom door. Pidge caught her breath and went to open the door only for Leon to immediately hop up on his hind legs and place his paws at her hips like a hug. Pidge pet his head and realized her hand was shaking.

Then, because Leon was the only one with her and he was a dog, she fell to her knees and allowed the tears to stream into his fur as he nuzzled against her, keeping his paws firm on her arms.

It wasn’t the nightmare itself that drove her to tears. It was the fact that she still got them so much, and she feared she might never break free from their grip. It was suffocating to wake up to them all the time. She felt like she might never get her peace from everything she went through. In a way it terrified her more to think that the people she loved still had to deal with it and that it could possibly drive them away.

Leon sniffed and huffed, bumping his wet nose against her cheek. Pidge smiled and ruffled his hair. “You’re a good dog, buddy.” Leon’s tail wagged frantically. “Thanks. I’m okay now.” Leon stayed on her until Pidge nudged him gently so she could stand. Even then, he began to follow her as she went to the kitchen to make herself a peanut butter and jelly sandwich.

About an hour after she woke up, Lance came back to the apartment, having finished his last book signing. He plopped down on the couch beside Pidge and laid down to rest his head on her thigh.

“Rough day?” she asked. Leon hopped onto the couch to curl up by Lance’s stomach, resting his head on Lance’s side.

“Not really,” he sighed. “Just… tiring.” Pidge raised an eyebrow and lowered the volume of the TV.

“Care to elaborate?”

Lance huffed and turned to lay on his back, staring at the ceiling. “You know how when you watch a show or read a book, you have favorite characters?” Pidge nodded. “It’s really great to hear about it from the people who read my books. The kids will have little drawings or some people will dress up. And it’s so funny to see people dressing up as me or Hunk or you.” He sighed and met her eyes. “Today, there were a lot of people asking about Kyle.”

Pidge furrowed her eyebrows in confusion before realizing what he meant. “Oh. Keith.” Lance nodded.

“And usually, I’m good with that! Like I said, I made my peace with it, kind of. It’s not like we hate each other, we just had different plans. And I’m usually good about not letting my emotions get in the way when I see the cosplay or the artwork or get the questions. I mean some people manage a really good resemblance sometimes.”

“So what made it harder this time?”

Lance took a breath and sat up to ruffle through his messenger bag. He had a few papers all in their own plastic sleeves. “Ever since you and Hunk found me, I guess a part of me has also been waiting on Keith. I don’t know anything about him at all, and that didn’t bother me until I realized how much I needed you guys. The latest book has a lot of the beginning of our relationship, so of course….” He held out the papers and Pidge took them.

The first one looked like a kid had drawn it, in that cute little anime style Pidge remembered people doing when she was in middle school. It had what Pidge assumed to be Keith- or Kyle- with his arms around Lance. She moved to the next page. This one seemed like an actual page from a graphic novel. A comic of what Pidge assumed was one of the scenes in the book, because she recalled Lance telling her and Hunk about this moment when he was gushing about Keith while they tried to run a diagnostic. The next page had cute mini versions with big heads of Lance and Keith doing cute little things with hearts around the borders. The next page had a beautiful watercolor version of the two of them kissing.

She sighed and looked at him. He was holding out a few more papers. “There’s some of you and Hunk too, if you want them,” he said tiredly.

Pidge rolled her eyes and took the papers, stacking them all on the coffee table. “Lance, come here.” She opened her arms and Lance laid back down as she cradled him. He hid his face in the fabric of her hoodie- which was actually Hunk’s- and Leon took his place by Lance’s feet. “It’s okay to miss him.”

“I know, but it feels fresh again.” His voice came muffled and weak. Pidge hugged him a little tighter. “You really should look at the ones of you and Hunk though, they’re really cute.”

Pidge laughed ruffled his hair. “You’ve got some talented fans.” Lance turned his head, no longer hiding his face as he smiled and nodded.

When Hunk came home, he treated them both to dinner at a restaurant, and Matt met up with them when he was off of work.

While Hunk and Lance went on a tangent about their jobs, Matt nudged Pidge’s arm and leaned over.

“You okay?”

She frowned and nodded. “Why?”

“You had a nightmare, didn’t you?”

“How do you know that?”

Matt rolled his eyes. “You’re my little sister. I know you pretty well. You always act skittish after a nightmare, and you look like you haven’t slept.”

“Gee thanks,” she muttered.

“You know that’s not what I meant.” He looked over at Lance and Hunk then lowered his voice. “You know if you need to talk, I’m always here for you, Katie.”

She smiled at him and nodded, squeezing his hand as a thank you.

They stayed at the restaurant long after finishing their food. They talked about everything, from the memories of their time in space, the games they’d play when they got bored, or just recalling how naive they were at such a young age to the various changes and personal stories from the last five years actually on Earth.

Just as Pidge had expected, Matt and Lance were able to bounce their jokes off each other with ease, practically being two sides of the same coin. It led to Pidge laughing almost non-stop until she was crying and hunched over with a stomach ache.

Matt didn’t ask if Pidge was coming home with him seeing as she’d been spending her time with Hunk and Lance, but Pidge did want a day with her brother. So she gave a Hunk a kiss on the cheek and said she’d see him tomorrow then hugged Lance before racing over to catch up with Matt.

Matt smiled, the scar on his face outlining the curve of his cheeks when he did, and threw an arm around her. “Aw, you miss me.”

Pidge laughed and rolled her eyes.

When they got home, Matt went into the kitchen to make himself a coffee. Pidge had been so full, she had no idea how he still had room for it.

“Do you still get nightmares?” she asked as he looked for a mug. “You never tell me about them.”

He looked over at her and shrugged. “Every now and then. Not often. They’ve been sparser as the years go by.”

“When do you think that’ll happen for me?”

Matt poured his coffee and sat down across from her. “I don’t know. I mean, you don’t get them as much when you have classes. I’ve noticed you don’t call me about them much. Then every time you visit, you get them more.”

Pidge grimaced. “What, so you think you’re triggering them?”

Matt shrugged. “I don’t really know, Katie. But I do think you should talk to somebody when you get them. Me or Hunk or Lance or maybe even your roommate. You said you told her about Voltron and everything, right?” She nodded. “I think it would help not to bottle up the nightmares.”

“But it’s all the same. Or about the same stuff. At this point, I’m more panicked about the fact that I can’t stop getting the nightmares than the nightmares themselves.” She frowned and ran her hand through her hair. “Anyway, I don’t want to talk about them. I just want to hang out with you.”

Matt scrunched up his nose. “Hanging out with your big brother? What a nerd.” Pidge grabbed the roll of paper towels on the table and threw it at him.

The next morning, Pidge decided to go sightseeing. Lance said he was feeling a little sick, so he didn’t join her, and Matt and Hunk were both working. She didn’t want to stay in the apartment all day, even though she had already seen the Strip multiple times at this point. It was still cool to see the booths with little tricks and the street performances. Since it was spring break, the entire Vegas was still very much alive during the day, not just at night.

Sure enough, as Pidge was walking out of Caesars Palace, she saw a girl being held up by her friends as she walked, obviously wasted. As she walked away, her phone started buzzing with an incoming call. She pulled it out and saw Hunk’s picture on the screen, which immediately made her smile.

“Hello?”

“Hey, honeybee. What are you doing?”

“Just walking around. How’s work?”

“Slow, actually. We’re closing early. I was about to grab lunch, where are you?”

“I’m actually pretty close to the bakery, I can meet you there.”

“Perfect! I’ll see you in a bit.”

They counted to three and hung up. Pidge walked across the street and down a few blocks until she reached the bakery. The closed sign was on, but Hunk was at the register with one of the workers and went over to open the door for her, greeting her with a kiss.

Pidge wasn’t going to lie, the act made her feel little butterflies in her stomach.

“It’s all locked away, Chef,” the girl at the counter said. “Are you locking up?”

“Yeah, go ahead and clock out, Amy.” She nodded, meanwhile Hunk turned to Pidge and raised an eyebrow. “So, what are you in the mood for?”

“Honestly, right now? Cake,” she said. The smell of confectioner’s sugar and frosting was making her mouth water, and all the impossible cakes around her were so colorful, it only made them that much more enticing.

Hunk laughed at her. “Really?” She nodded. “Well, I’ve got an idea. Come on.” He took her hand and led her back to the kitchen. Amy left out the back door with a wave, leaving Pidge and Hunk alone in the bakery.

“Are you making me a cake?” she asked.

Hunk laughed and grabbed an apron that was hung up before going over to her. Pidge raised an eyebrow. He draped the apron over her and gave her a cheeky smile. “No, you’re gonna make one with me.”

“That’s a horrible idea on several levels,” she said, as he turned her around to tie the apron.

“You’ll be fine.” He turned her back around, tucked a strand of her hair back with a gentle hand, and kissed her nose. “Come on.”

Weak-kneed, Pidge did.

He got out all the ingredients, laying them out along the counter, followed by the utensils. Pidge stared at all of it, feeling completely out of her element. She’d seen Hunk bake several times before. She’d watched and taste-tested and handed over ingredients or utensils as he asked for them mid conversation. Hell, she’d even fought the goo machines with him.

But actually partaking in the cooking? She had never done that. Hunk was gourmand, what could she possibly have to offer?

“Honeybun, it’s not that bad. Come on, I’ll be helping you with it.” With a light hand at the small of her back, he nudged her forward and began to take her step by step on how to make a cake from scratch.

As she did it, it started to seem a little easier. She was just measuring out ingredients and adding them to the bowl. Hunk smeared butter and sprinkled flour onto some baking pans, humming something under his breath.

Then he handed Pidge a mixer and told her to beat the wet ingredients before adding them to the dry ones. Pidge wasn’t sure why, but she did it. Her tongue stuck out slightly as she concentrated on mixing the wet ingredients. She poured them into the dry ingredients and turned the mixer on again.

Suddenly, the flour, sugar, and the egg mix all flew out of the bowl, startling Pidge further and making her knock the bowl over onto herself.

All she could hear was Hunk’s unreserved laughter.

“Pidge, you’re not supposed to start the mixer that fast!” he wheezed between breathless laughter, leaning against the counter for support.

“My finger slipped! Stop laughing at me!”

But Hunk’s full laughter already had him keeling over. It resonated through the kitchen and Pidge didn’t even mind that she was now covered in milk and flour and eggs. Still, she turned and grabbed a fistful of flour, flinging at him, making the crown of his head completely white.

“Wh-what! That’s not fair!” he said, still smiling with remnants of laughter in his eyes. He grabbed a fistful of his own bag of flour and blew it back at her.

“Oh, you jerk!” Pidge yelped, squeezing her eyes shut. She grabbed the bowl of what remained of the mixture. Hunk seemed to know what she was going to do before she did it.

“No, no, no!” he said, immediately backing up to the other side of the kitchen. He felt for the fridge handle behind him and blindly grabbed for something as Pidge neared him slowly. “Pidge, I’ve got a full container of whipped cream, and I’m not afraid to use it!”

Pidge smiled and grabbed a fistful of gunk from the bowl. “I dare you.” She raised an eyebrow.

Suddenly he was dashing across to the other end and she was running after him, throwing fistful after fistful while he flung back handfuls of whipped cream that clung to her clothes. Laughter filled the kitchen the more and more intense their food fight got. Suddenly they were throwing eggs, and Pidge managed to smear butter on Hunk’s face, then Hunk managed to douse Pidge in sporadic splatters of milk.

Soon they were covered in various ingredients, both refusing to back down until they ended up slipping on something they spilled. They collapsed on the floor trying to catch their breaths.

“Oh my God, my kitchen’s a mess,” Hunk said with a laugh, resting his head back on the wall. “How do you screw up a cake to this level?”

“In my defense, you helped in the wreckage.” Pidge scooted closer to him. She wrinkled her nose as she leaned in to kiss him. “You stink.”

“You got egg in my hair,” he pointed out. Pidge laughed and shrugged, running her fingers through her own matted hair. “Come on, the sink should be big enough to wash our hair out a bit.” He stood up and took her hand to help her up.

After managing to uncomfortably wash out their hair, they both put their hair up and wiped down what they could of their arms and faces. Their clothes would sadly remain until they got a change of clothes.

Before Pidge could start helping him clean the kitchen, Hunk told her to wait and took out the polaroid camera she’d gotten him from his office. He took two pictures of the scene before putting the camera and the photos back in his office and getting back.

“Okay, now we can clean.”

Pidge planned on never again having a food fight in a big kitchen. It was ridiculously tedious to clean everything down. Even with Hunk’s playfulness as he twirled her around and hummed different songs while they cleaned up together, Pidge ended up feeling exhausted, and still pretty gross from the stickiness of her clothes.

But it was a memory she would cherish forever. Hopefully it would be a memory to overlap one of the many horrible ones that contributed to restless nights.

In the end, Hunk did make her a cake. He took over while she watched and sat on a counter, just like old times. Except this time, he took to passing time by providing Pidge with light kisses and gentle nose bumps and sweet smiles.

When the cakes were done and cooled, Hunk went back into baker mode and began cutting the tops off before layering the cake. Pidge took to eating the pieces he cut off as he blocked her from seeing what he was decorating it with.

She could only see the Hunch of his shoulders, the slow, patient movements as he worked.

Finally he turned and presented her with her cake.

It was decorated in green frosting with a pretty yellow honeysuckle bunch and two small bees. Pidge smiled as she looked at it and covered her mouth. “Hunk, this is so pretty!”

“I would make you a much more intricate one like the ones on display, but you kept eating the scraps so I knew I had to feed you.”

Pidge scoffed and rolled her eyes. “I love it,” she said.

Hunk smiled and cut her a slice. “Try it.” Pidge took the slice and ate a forkful, sighing contentedly. “Good?” Pidge nodded, stuffing her face with more cake. Hunk laughed wiped some of the frosting from her lower lip. “I’m glad you like it, honeybee.”

Pidge set the cake aside and took Hunk’s hands in her own as he leaned in to give her a soft kiss. “I’m really glad I’m here with you,” she whispered. “And I’m so sorry about all that stupid stuff I’d say on the phone about you meeting someone new. Now that I’m here with you, it just feels so stupid-”

“Hey,” he said, cupping her face. “You’re not stupid, Pidge. I get why you said that, and I get why you worry. And the people that think we can’t make this work have no idea what we’ve already been through. I know you like to plan everything out and think of every possible scenario, so I really do get it, Pidge. Just….” He pressed her hand up to his lips. “I need to know you believe me when I tell you I won’t ever do anything to hurt you.”

Pidge smiled and nodded. “I believe you. I love you.” Hunk’s lips parted slightly before curling into a smile.

“You mean that?”

Pidge bit her lip. Saying it made her feel lighter. Everything she felt in response to Hunk, every wild butterfly, every giddy laugh, and every moment of peace…. This was what they all amounted to. To this unfiltered love she hadn’t even realized she’d been nurturing for so long already.

“Yeah,” she breathed.

Hunk smiled and kissed her again before whispering, “Oute alofa ia te oe.”

Pidge furrowed her eyebrows. “You’ve said that before, haven’t you?” Hunk’s smile grew wider. “Wait. No.” He chuckled and kissed the tip of her nose. “I can’t believe you told me you loved me and I didn’t even realize it.”

Hunk touched her cheek lightly, looking at her with soft, big, brown eyes that made her feel like she was the most important person on the planet. And maybe to him she was for that moment.

“Okay, as much as I would like to keep kissing you, we need to get a change of clothes because they’re really starting to smell,” he said, pulling her off the counter. Pidge sniffed her sweater and grimaced. “I’ll put this in a box and we can take it back. We should also probably get some actual food.”

“I’ll call Lance and see if he wants anything. He said he was feeling sick.”

Hunk busied himself with putting the cake up, and Pidge followed him to his car as she dialed Lance.

“Hey, what’s up?” he answered. He sounded… flustered.

“You okay?”

“Yeah.”

Pidge hummed. “How are you feeling?”

“Um. Tired.”

“Well, are you hungry?”

“Yeah, actually I was about to order Thai. You coming over?”

“Yep. Hunk’s with me, he closed up early.” She looked over at Hunk. “Lance is ordering Thai.”

“Tell him he’d better be using his own card this time.”

Pidge laughed and relayed the information to Lance.

“Wa-wha-huh? -idge? You- cutting ou- guess you’re going through a tunnel, bye!”

“We’re not-” He hung up and Pidge stared at the phone. “That was a horrible impression of a broken call.” In the driver’s seat, Hunk groaned and shook his head.

When they got home, the Thai food was already there and Lance was stuffing his face with rice at the table. “You’re paying my next bill, man,” Hunk said as he grabbed an eggroll.

“What the hell happened to you two and why do you smell like a dairy aisle?” Lance responded through a mouthful of food.

“Food fight,” Pidge said. Lance nodded and furrowed his eyebrows as they went into Hunk’s room. Hunk lended her some drawstring shorts and a hoodie. She went into the bathroom to change and once they were both in clothes that didn’t smell, they joined Lance at the table.

“Pidge said you were sick,” Hunk said. He looked at him and put a hand to his forehead. “You don’t feel warm. What’s wrong?”

Lance looked at them, stuffing more food in his mouth. Then he said, “I’m heart sick. I have a broken heart.”

“Are you fucking kidding me?” Pidge answered in exasperation. “What are you talking about?”

“Being heartbroken totally counts as being sick, Katie.” Lance stuck his tongue out at her and Hunk chuckled at his expense.

“Alright, well who broke your heart?”

This time, the light playfulness in Lance’s eyes dimmed a bit and he opened his laptop. “It’s not….” He sighed and took a breath. “I found Keith.”

“What?”

Lance ran a hand through his hair and hugged his food closer. “Not like in real life, and not like… to where I can contact him. I just….” He turned the laptop and Pidge and Hunk leaned forward to see the screen better.

All she saw was a variety of photos from different places, different countries. “Uh?”

Lance rolled his eyes and scrolled, clicking on an album. This one had what looked like a silhouette standing somewhere with a pretty mountain backdrop covered in fog and a soft blue sky. There was a caption on the bottom that said, I see you in every sky. Lance clicked through the album. Each photo had a silhouette which Pidge assumed was Keith against a pretty scene whether it was cobblestone roads, between clotheslines in what looked like some ethereal field, or blending into the silhouettes of trees. Each photo had different captions that seemed too vague to pertain to the photo itself like I wanted to believe, Has time erased the love from your life?, The stars are nothing in comparison to your galaxy.

“How do you know it’s him?” Hunk asked. The silhouette never had any actual features. Short hair, a lithe posture, and various clothes for the weather. It wasn’t like Keith was still wearing his red crop jacket or still sporting a stylized mullet anymore.

Lance scrolled all the way down and clicked the “about” button. It led to a resume style page with a portrait photo of someone who was undeniably Keith. The burn scar was still prominent on his right cheek and Pidge had yet to meet anyone with the same lavender eyes. His hair was much shorter than the last time she’d seen him, but he was still all angles and sharp edges. He was holding one of those fancy cameras, but his expression remained somber. He could’ve been a model, and Pidge found ironic that he preferred to be behind the camera.

“Oh my God,” Hunk breathed.

“Apparently he’s traveled to major cities already and started taking to finding the lesser known villages and small corners of the world to photograph them and make them known. I don’t really know what the captions are for, I can’t tell if it’s a story or not, but… yeah. He’s a fucking photographer somewhere out in the world.”

“How did you find this?”

Lance blushed slightly. “I Googled him. I went through a bunch of Facebook and Instagram profiles with the same name before I found one that talked about a photograph website. I didn’t think it’d be him, and I almost gave up, but I figured what if? And it was him.”

Pidge looked at Hunk and then back at the screen before looking at Lance. “Are you going to try to find him? Contact him?”

Lance shoveled food into his mouth again and huffed. “There’s no contact information on there. It doesn’t even say where he’s at right now. And there’s no actual personal bios, just explanations of the project and the captions on the photos.”

“Yeah, that sounds like Keith,” Hunk said. “Do you want to find a way to contact him?”

Lance stirred his rice and Pidge noticed Leon trot a little closer, curling by his legs. “I don’t know,” he whispered. “I mean… he’s doing what he wants, right? He’s seeing the world. I’m in New York and after all this time, it’s not like we can just…. What if he found someone already? Someone who travels with him and takes his pictures and he takes their pictures and….” Lance shook his head. “We already had our story. And it’s over. If he doesn’t have any contact information, it’s because he doesn’t want to be contacted.” He put the food on the table and groaned, placing his face in his hands. “It’s been so long and all of these feelings are just flooding back. I don’t even know what to do about them. All that love and the hurt and the sadness and the nostalgia it’s all just… back.”

“That’s normal, man,” Hunk said, scooting his chair closer to Lance to put a hand on his shoulder. “You guys were still in love when you broke it off. Most people who break up see it coming or at least there’s a reason that you can’t go back from. You guys ended it because you were both taking different paths. You didn’t stop loving him.”

“What if he did?”

Pidge furrowed her eyebrows, her heart breaking with the amount of pain in Lance’s voice. Hunk brought him into a hug and Leon stood on his hind legs to paw at Lance’s arm. Lance sighed and looked at Leon, petting him gently. “I think I’m gonna take a nap. I was up all night obsessing over that website, and now I’ve eaten most of my feelings, so…. Can I use your bed?” Hunk nodded and Lance shut his laptop before heading off to Hunk’s room.

As soon as the door shut, Pidge looked at Hunk. “Can I see your laptop?”

Hunk frowned, but got up to bring her the laptop. She turned it on and searched the website, happy to see that Hunk already had the same software she’d downloaded on her own computer for occasional hacking. “What are you doing?” he asked, leaning over to look over her shoulder.

“I’m figuring out where Keith’s at.”

“What?”

Pidge used the pictures to trace the locations, finding places she’d never even known existed. Keith had really gone into the most obscure places.

“Honeycomb, he could be anywhere at this point, finding the photo locations won’t- is that a government website?”

“Wouldn’t be the first time,” she answered.

“In a few years, I’m gonna be visiting you in a federal prison, aren’t I?”

“Bold of you to assume I’ll get caught. I’m offended.”

“Well- whoa, what the hell?” Pidge had managed to pull up a file on Keith. “How…?”

“We were paladins. We fought aliens. You think the government isn’t keeping tabs on us?” Hunk grabbed his food and pulled his chair to sit closer to Pidge as she scrolled. “Jesus Christ. He’s been to over 100 countries. And even more cities and towns.”

“Is that his permanent address?”

“It’s what’s listed, but he hasn’t been there in over a year,” she muttered under her breath.

“This is borderline stalking.”

Pidge looked over at him and raised an eyebrow. “Everything we’ve been through, you’re drawing the line at this?”

Hunk laughed and shook his head. “Absolutely not. My girl’s a fucking genius.” Pidge winked and returned to the screen. “What about a phone number?”

“There’s a house phone listed. No cellphone. God, why is he a real life cryptid, what the fuck?”

“Maybe Lance is right. Maybe he doesn’t want to be found. He doesn’t have any family on Earth, there’s no one for him to stay in contact with.”

“We were his family! We spent all that time together, building relationships, fighting a war, and we created our own family. We all wanted to be found, you, me, Lance. Keith does too.” Her fingers flew over the keys almost maniacally. “There. If a former paladin is traveling, you can count on our government following them. He last made it to… Attu island.”

“Holy shit. You actually found him.”

“Why do you sound so surprised?”

“I mean I knew you would, just not that fast.” Pidge shrugged. There was a beat of silence, where they both stared at the name of the island on the screen. “Lance doesn’t even know if he wants to contact him though. I don’t think you should tell him yet. Let him sort out what he’s feeling.”

Pidge took a breath and eventually resigned, nodding her head and exiting the site. But she made a note in her phone of Keith’s website before finally dropping the subject fully.

Hunk wrapped an arm around her. They finished their food in silence, Pidge leaning against Hunk as they both tried to let all the new information sink in.

It was strange to believe that just a few hours ago, she had told Hunk she loved him for the first time. It was a moment she thought would have been big and dramatic, probably said in front of the Bellagio, and honestly, said by Hunk first. Of course, he did say it first, but she didn’t know that.

Now she was reeling with the fact that Lance had managed to find Keith. It was concerning that he was so hung up on finding him that he managed it, but… Pidge was the one hacking government files for information. And now they knew where he was.

Maybe it was the fact that she didn’t have much of her blood family left. All she had was Matt. The prospect of getting her space family back together felt like a necessity. To get them all back in her life, to build that support they should have been for each other from the start.

But Hunk was right. Shiro had gone under the radar with some work for the Garrison, and Keith obviously didn’t want anyone contacting him. She wondered if they missed each other. They’d been practically brothers after all. She wondered if Keith had been living through acquaintances this entire time. Five years bouncing from place to place… it couldn’t have given him time for friends, much less a relationship as Lance feared. She wondered if Shiro was okay, and if she could maybe bring herself to go back to the Garrison, if only to see him again.

Then she began to wonder about Allura and Coran. If they had rebuilt their lives, if they remembered the paladins, if Allura ever thought of them or if Coran still called her Number Five when or if he ever talked about her.

And suddenly she was crying. She hated how often she was starting to do that, and ever since Matt pointed it out, she realized it really did happen more when she wasn’t at school. In a way it made sense because at school she wasn’t surrounded by reminders or talking about the memories. But she also didn’t want it to be a bad thing because she loved being with Hunk and Lance and Matt. She was creating new memories with them.

“Oh, Pidge, come here,” Hunk murmured, pulling her from the chair and taking her to the couch where he could properly cuddle her.

“I miss them so much,” she whispered, wiping her eyes and trying to force herself to stop crying. She’d never cried this much even as a teen in a war. It was ridiculous.

“I know. I miss them too.” Hunk scratched her head soothingly, bringing her in closer. “We’re always going to hold on to pieces from our past. And honestly, knowing Keith? It seems like he’s been running from it. It won’t be long before he has to face it. For all we know, he’s just as strung up on Lance as Lance is on him.”

“How did we all make things so difficult for ourselves? We should have stuck together.”

“We all needed different things, Pidge. We just have to take it step by step.” She nodded and held onto him tighter, letting the rise and fall of his chest soothe her. “Hey.” She looked up at him. “I love you.”

Pidge smiled and bit her lip. “That’s the first time you’ve said it in English,” she whispered. He smiled at her. “I love you too.”

He pressed a kiss to both of her eyelids before kissing her lips. He cupped her face with large hands that cradled her gently, like she was fragile. She loved how safe she felt when he did that. How adored she felt because of it. She loved Hunk.

“Got your passport?” Pidge nodded. “Your chargers, laptop, phone?” Pidge nodded. “Do you have snacks for the flight, I know it’s a long plane ride. Here, I got you some chocolate covered pretzels and-”

“Matt, I’ll be okay,” Pidge said with a laugh. “It’s not the first time I leave.”

“I know, but the next time I see you, it’ll be for your graduation. It’s kind of freaking me out.”

“Yeah, well once I graduate, you’ll get sick of me because I’ll be living with you.”

Matt rolled his eyes and pulled her into a hug. She returned it just as tightly. When she pulled away, he was giving her the bag of pretzels which made her laugh. “Tell me when you land, okay?” She nodded. Matt turned to Lance. “You stay in touch with me. Spent a whole war without hardly a word to each other and now-”

“We’re practically giving these two a free comedy improv show,” Lance said with a laugh. “Yeah, I was a little naive as a kid. I’ll stay in touch.” Lance turned to Hunk giving him a hug and a thank you for letting him stay before pulling away.

Pidge walked over to Hunk and smiled as she thought of the last time she’d been in this airport with him. How close she’d been to kissing him, only to chicken out. It was funny to think about now.

“I love you,” Hunk murmured into her hair as he hugged her. “You’re gonna kick ass in your classes, and I’ll see you for your graduation, okay?” She nodded and got on her toes, pulling him into a kiss.

“I love you. I’ll call when I get home, okay?” Hunk nodded and tucked a strand of her hair behind her ear.

“Ready?” Lance asked. She nodded and they walked over to the person checking tickets. Hunk and Matt stayed until they’d gone through the doors.

After getting through all the tedious routines, they boarded the plane. Once take off started, Pidge focused on breathing and staying calm against the rumbling and slight shudder of the plane. She felt Lance take her hand and squeeze it.

Strangely, that helped her relax a little more. Especially since he wasn’t looking at her. He’d just taken her hand and held it tightly, giving her something to tether herself with. Leon also poked his head out from under Lance’s feet, placing his head on her lap. Soon enough, the plane leveled out and the shuddering stopped.

She loosened her grip on Lance’s hand and he let go. “I wonder when the drink cart is gonna come. I’m craving a soda.” Pidge smiled.

Lance flight from Massachusetts to New York wasn’t for another four hours, so he took her home and made sure she was stocked up on food to survive before they split a pizza. It was very little time before Lance had to get back to the airport.

Before going through the next goodbye, Pidge knew she had to tell him about Keith. But maybe not all once. Or maybe not everything.

“Hey, so about the website….”

What webs- oh. Yeah, what about it?”

Pidge bit her lip and shrugged. “I’m the girl that hacked into Garrison files and tricked them into thinking I was a boy for a year. I also decoded alien communication and coded upgrades into Altean castle defenses.” Lance stared at her, his eyebrows furrowed. She sighed. “I’m pretty sure I could figure out where Keith’s at so you could try and contact him…. If that’s something you wanted to do.”

“Oh. Oh God.” Lance chuckled awkwardly. “I don’t wanna ask that of-”

“Lance, you’ve helped me a lot too. You’re one of my best friends, practically another brother. I’m good at hacking and tech. So if you want my help, just ask. Think it over, you don’t need to tell me now. I just wanted you to know it was an option.”

Lance smiled and nodded. “Thanks, Pidge. I gotta sort my head out a bit, but… I’ll keep it in mind.” He hugged her tightly and added, “Good luck with the rest of school. Feel free to visit me in New York if you ever have a long weekend, okay? I can drive down, it’s not that bad of a drive.”

She laughed and nodded. “Okay. Let me know when you get home, okay?” He nodded and whistled for Leon so he could put his leash on. Pidge stayed at the door, watching as he got into the Uber and staying until the car disappeared down the street.

#hidge #platonic plance #fragile hearts #team punk #reblog #feedback pls

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firesofdainix · 6 years

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I Learn to Live Half-Alive

AO3 Version

PREQUEL: LONG ROAD to SUCCESS

Everyone emerging from the simulation, all changed. And they hate it.

the former ultimate adventurer celebrates the day he dies.

Amami is happy that he dies the first in the game.

Rantaro remembered the time he was in love with Danganronpa. But that was a long time ago, before he goes in that virtual world. He hates it in there. Despair crawling on his back, and hoping it'd end soon. And it honestly did, after Chapter 6 of the fifty-second game. No, that wasn't the end. Since the Danganronpa fans 'loved' him so much, Team Danganronpa decided to bring him back to the virtual world. To bring him back to the place he hates so much.

Tsumugi Shirogane.

He knows she's the mastermind of v3, but of course, his avatar from the virtual world didn't know that, and ended up getting killed. And he enjoyed it.

Rantaro can't wait to just go back to the world where he was friends with Angie, Maki, Himiko, Shuichi, and, of course, Kokichi. Rantaro knows Kokichi loves him, and the feeling is mutual. Even confessed his love to him before the boy gets into the audition. He just wished he spent more time with the boy before they go inside the virtual world. But seeing each other was prohibited.

Rantaro is escorted out of the simulation room. The hallways, corridors, and doors were all familiar to him, because he's already been in here before. A Chapter One victim, huh? Very ironic, since in this season, he's the Ultimate Survivor, replacing his old Ultimate Adventurer talent. He can't help a smile creep up his face because he is already free from the hands of Danganronpa. He must be assuming all his fans are in an uproar because he was killed of so early in the game. But, you can't satisfy audiences with anything.

Before he goes home, he has to rest for some time in the Waiting Area. His father never cares about him, and only cares about his reputation. He sighs, knowing it can't be helped if his father has no interest in him. And Rantaro has no interest in keeping the Amami Family's name. Just give it to one of his sisters or something.

"You're Rantaro Amami, right?", a soft voice in front of him asks. He nods and looks up, seeing a face he never seen in real life ever: Kyoko Kirigiri.

"K-Kirigiri?", he says in disbelief. Why is a fictional character standing in front of him? Is he going mental?

"I see you don't believe me being alive", Kyoko says, sitting down next to Rantaro, who scoots away, with confusion in his eyes. "Don't worry. Eleven years ago, along with the Super Danganronpa Two cast, we were also in the virtual world."

"So... does that mean...?"

"Every Danganronpa show is from the virtual world." Kyoko sighs. "And we still carry the burden of being in those games."

"Um, not to be nosy, why are you here?", Rantaro asks.

Kyoko looks at a black television screen with sad eyes. "My daughter... is participating in that show."

Rantaro blinks. "May I ask... who is it?"

"Kaede", Kyoko replies, looking at her gloved hands.

Rantaro tilts his head. Kyoko, the first Ultimate Detective in the very first show of Danganronpa, is the mother of Kaede? This doesn't make any sense at all. First, he meets a character that is not fictional, and now, they're related to someone he hates? He has to get a grip of himself.

"May I ask who her father is?", Rantaro asks.

"Oh, I just adopted Kaede and her twin, along with Celeste."

And... she's married to Celeste. Rantaro sighs, and slouches on the chair he's sitting in.

"Who killed you?", Kyoko asks bluntly.

"The mastermind", Rantaro replies, feeling a little uncomfortable on talking about how his avatar died.

"Oh, then the mystery will be solved", Kyoko says.

Rantaro shakes his head. "No, knowing Tsumugi... she can frame someone anytime. But don't worry, the trials won't start until the next day."

Kyoko looks at him with something called... worry. "You've been in there... for two days."

Wait. Rantaro looks at his hands. They look to be a sickly pale color. And it looks skinny too.

"But... doesn't Team Danganronpa give them breaks?"

Kyoko shakes her head. "Sadly, not anymore. The fans wanted none stop Danganronpa v3."

That's... messed up. The reason why Team Danganronpa provided breaks is to (somehow) regain their sanity and make themselves comfortable with how they're living now. After all, they will gain their many riches in life. But remembering the traumatizing events in the simulation, and bringing it to the real world was making him mentally unstable, to the point of trying to kill someone before it was time to go back to the world of madness.

Without those breaks, each and every single one of those people in the simulation will be mentally unstable, to the point of attacking people in variety of ways. It made Rantaro mad because Team Danganronpa are filling their fans in for what they wanted, rather than what the participants want. He grits his teeth, controlling the anger inside him.

"Will Kaede be okay?", Kyoko says to herself.

Rantaro hates Kaede for being a bitch in the real world. Blackmailing people is her best hobby. Maybe she's the one who convinced Kokichi to go audition for Danganronpa. But in the actual show, she's a very positive, kind and caring students. He can feel his feelings mixing because of Kaede in that simulation.

"I think so..."

"If she comes back, I'll give her a scolding", Kyoko says. "But, you don't need to know that."

Rantaro nods. "Hey, don't you and Kaede have different surnames though?"

Instead of telling him to mind his own business, the purple woman just shrugs. "I told her she can pick any name... Anyway, as much as I like to tell you more, but I need to go to work. There is no point in watching their investigation if the television screen is black."

With only one wave of her hand, she dismisses their conversations. Her virtual self and real self are almost the same, except this Kyoko is a bit more open into sharing her experience while the virtual Kyoko doesn't. Maybe that's why he likes Kyoko when he watched Danganronpa for the first time. That hint of hype in the many shows of it made Rantaro love Danganronpa. But his favorite Danganronpa show was Super Danganronpa 2.

Well, it used to be, now he just can't seem to like Danganronpa anymore. It's really weird how people are changed so easily after discovering the dark side of everything you love. Like, becoming infatuated with this one person, but when they reveal their true colors, your affection for them lowers, until you have nothing to feel anymore. That's what Rantaro feels.

"You're giving up that easily?", a voice in his mind says. He looks around. The Waiting Area was empty. Maybe he's just hearing things. And he is.

"Hey, at least you'd still get the money", the voice speaks again.

Rantaro just lowers his head, ignoring his inner subconscious speaking inside of him. There's no way of refuting some imaginary voice inside his head. Until Team Danganronpa gives him therapy. But their only therapy is Tsumugi, and, as Rantaro recalled his therapy lessons with her, they were all pieces of shit, with her acting like nothing happened. The real therapist who pursued him was Keebo. Yet, he's also participating in Danganronpa, because he wants to be with his sister or some bullshit like that.

Apparently, they still haven't called his family, which was nice. He doesn't want to get back home yet. Hey, at least he has tons of cash he'll give to his family once he gets back. He doesn't really know what time it is, but he knows his been sitting in the Waiting Area for hours, until one of the Team Danganronpa staff comes in.

"Mr. Amami", she says politely. "It's time for your dinner."

Rantaro nods, and stands up, his legs shaking a little since he hadn't used it other than doing movements. It's nighttime already. Does this mean the trial is over? If so, who did Tsumugi frame?

"Excuse me, but is the first class trial done?", he asks the Danganronpa staff. She nods.

"Yes, but she needs some rest after her execution", she replies as they walk to the dining hall.

She. It must be a girl whom Tsumugi framed, then. But he wonders who it could be until he and the staff finally reaches the dining hall.

Rantaro realized he hadn't eaten for two days, so his stomach rumbles at the sight of the food on the table. He sits across from the Danganronpa staff, taking as much food as he wants, eyes shining and mouth drooling. When was the last time he ate real food than canned goods at the dark rooms of the building? Oh yeah, Tsumugi's mansion. He can't afford to think of his bad memories now when he starts to eat. He doesn't want to spoil his appetite.

Eating away his problems is basically what he did after the many trials of Danganronpa 52. And he's so damn skinny... he just needs food. That's it.

After getting his stomach full, he returns to the waiting room, to sit again on a seat at the Waiting Area. And no one was around. He sighs. He needs someone to talk to. He scratches the back of his head. He then suddenly remembers his death. He dodges that memory. He doesn't want to think about his death when he's this full.

It all started with the contract. He unwittingly signed it, because he was desperate for fame and attention. He wants to become a champion, someone who will win, someone who will be everyone's fan favorite. He did all this so he can be famous, not thinking of consequences, looking back now, he wouldn't have gone mental if he hadn't signed that contract.

"R-Rantaro?", a sad, yet familiar voice snaps him back to reality. He looks up, to see...

"Kaede?", he says. She looks like she's been crying, but there are still tears streaming down her face.

"I-I thought I was alone here, and y-you left", she says, hesitating to sit down next to him.

"Nah, my parents didn't know I fucking died and some shit."

He pats a chair next to him. "Sit. We have a lot to talk about."

Hesitantly, she sits down next to him. No one says anything for about ten minutes.

"Look, let's cut to the chase, okay?", Rantaro says, seemingly comforting the girl beside him. "You're the one Tsumugi framed to be my killer?"

Kaede looks up to meet Rantaro's eyes. "Yeah... wait, you mean the girl from 52?"

Rantaro nods. "Yes, her. She killed me."

Kaede facepalms. "And I thought I killed you..."

"Meh, your ball missed me."

Kaede's eyes widen. "It missed you? What the fuck?"

"Yeah, thanks to you, I got distracted by it, so Tsumugi can hit me with her own shot put ball."

"O-okay, so it's my fault you got killed?"

Rantaro shrugs. "Eh, kinda. By the way, your mom was here."

Kaede fidgets with her hands. "What? Did you know what she said?"

"Yeah, she missed you. Also, she said that she'll give you a scolding later."

"Well, Kyoko tends to do that. Goddamn, my neck is itchy." She starts to scratch it, then Rantaro catches a glimpse of her neck. It has red scratch marks on it, some obviously a little too deep.

"Death by strangulation?", he says out loud.

Kaede looks back at him, then attempts to hide her scars. She looks down again. "Actually, death by hanging..."

Rantaro fakes a cough. "O-Oh, I see..."

So, Kaede got executed by hanging. Well, this is off to a pretty brutal start, but he hopes the others don't actually get executed like Kaede. But, this is Danganronpa. They'll always get brutally executed, no matter how much you do or don't deserve it. He looks at Kaede, who's scratching her neck again. He wants to tell her to stop, but... she seems to be entranced by scratching her neck. So he minds his own business.

"Ms. Akamatsu, there you are!", a Team Danganronpa staff calls from the front of the Waiting Area. Ms. Kirigiri and Ms. Ludenberg are here to pick you up."

"They're here already...?", Kaede says. The staff nods.

"They were actually watching your... um, your chapter."

Kaede nods. "Tell them I need a minute." The staff nods, and exits the Waiting Area.

"I have to ask you something. You're close friends with Shuichi, right?"

Kaede looks at him with sadness in her eyes. "Y-yeah..."

"How do you feel about him now?"

"I have mixed feelings. Some part of me still thinks he's some kind of pawn, but the other part of me thinks of him as a friend."

Rantaro smiles. It's kinda nice that Danganronpa is giving them a change of heart for how they feel. It's one of those things Danganronpa does to make them confused with feelings. And he absolutely hates feelings. Why does he have to have these conflicting feelings that handle him, that makes him decide what kind of feeling he's supposed to show to anyone.

"Hey, are you gonna be okay being alone here?", Kaede asks him, still scratching her neck.

"I'm always alone", Rantaro replies, and watches her go. It seems like their conversation started a century ago. And he wanted it back. Why isn't his father picking him up yet?

"Excuse me, Mr. Amami?", the Team Danganronpa staff comes back, bearing some kinds of pills and a key. "Since your father is not yet here, you can stay in one of our rooms."

Rantaro yawns. "Okay, lead the way, then."

They walk through twist and turns, his head aching a bit, remembering the Ultimate Academy. Once they reach the room he's going to stay in the night, the staff gives him the key and bows, waiting for him to go inside.

The room is decent, at least for him. Yet it gives off being stuck in the Ultimate Academy. He shudders at the thought, and tries to push it back into his mind. But his dorm in the simulation keeps getting in the way of his train of thoughts. He inhales, then exhales, and goes in the room, closing the door.

He looks at the bed. It's very well-made, and it still reminds him of the school. He needs a good night's sleep. Yeah, just one good sleep, and everything will go away. All of his bad thoughts, his memories of the Danganronpa v3, will all vanish once he goes to sleep.

As his head hits the pillow, he goes to his dreams. But this dreams are not normal dreams. He opens his eyes, to find himself floating on dark water. It must be water, after all, it sounds like one. But... is that a fin, coming to get him?

Rantaro's eyes widen. He paddles as fast as he can, but he can only see darkness. Darkness surrounding everything. He's so confused, he keeps on paddling. But he hears the roaring of a waterfall. And he falls. He falls and falls, falling to darker waters. He looks up, to see nothing but darkness. But he feels like he's floating. Suddenly, he can't breathe. Were is he?

His limbs feel like wood, and he feels strings lifting him, higher, higher. He feels pain, he feels the strings burning his wooden limbs. Then he finally sees the person lifting him up. And it was him, before everything started, before he knew what Danganronpa truly is, before he stopped believing Danganronpa. The other Rantaro smirks.

"You're useless." Then he feels his limbs going slack, the strings around him falling. He looks up to see himself, smiling and laughing as he falls. This was who he is before everything, after all. Of course he's that cruel, a side he never tells anyone.

Rantaro wakes up, cold sweat on his forehead. He looks around. Just ordinary darkness. He's in a blanket. Nothing scary here. He lowers his head. And he thought he can escape his thoughts by going into his dreams. But no, that'll never happen, in his case. He'll always be followed by his bad deeds, his thoughts, everything. He'll never escape them. He'll live with it forever.

#danganronpa #danganronpa v3 #fanfic #i learn to live half alive #rantaro amami #kaede akamatsu #kyoko kirigiri #celestia ludenberg #oumami #amabo #kiibouma #kiiboumami

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analogscum · 5 years

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SCUM IN THE AISLES #4 (The House That Jack Built: Unrated Director’s Cut)

Sometimes, in order to seek out the weirdest discarded slices of celluloid trash that cinema has to offer, one must leave the confines of their crappy apartment, and go to an actual movie theater. This is a column recounting my excursions into the b-movie wilds. This is Scum in the Aisles!

PART 1: ANTICIPATION

“You’ve all bought tickets for a Lars von Trier film, so you know what you’re getting yourselves into.”

With this, Justin Timms, the founder of the Brooklyn Horror Film Festival, and our host for this evening in a dark and chilly corner of Greenpoint known as the Film Noir Cinema, ceded the floor to the film we had all gathered to experience, The House That Jack Built. A two and a half hour art house serial killer epic by perhaps the most controversial filmmaker alive. A film that prompted both mass walkouts (anywhere between a dozen and a hundred people, depending on who you ask) and a ten minute standing ovation when it premiered out of competition at this year’s Cannes Film Festival. A film which has since been decried as a gruesome, sadistic, mean-spirited slog by some, and praised as a beautiful, self-reflexive act of provocation by others.

Timms, for his part, had just seen the film for the first time along with the crowd from the first screening of the evening, and he looked positively shell-shocked. All around me, the crowd buzzed with nervousness and excitement. What sort of celluloid horrors awaited us? Would we be able to stomach what was splayed up on the screen? Would cinema’s angry Danish trickster god once again succeed in getting under our skin and raising our cockles? Or had his flagellations, both towards himself and the audience that improbably keeps coming back (myself included), grown tired and stale?

Our host had claimed that we knew what we were getting ourselves into simply by showing up to watch a Lars von Trier film…but did we?

PART 2: SYNOPSIS

The House That Jack Built follows Jack (Matt Dillon, turning in a career best performance) over roughly twelve years of a very eventful life. Jack lives somewhere in the Pacific Northwest, he’s an engineer who dabbles in architecture on the side. He comes from a wealthy family; his inheritance allows him to buy a large plot of land by a picturesque lake and build his titular house. However, what Jack really loves, his true passion in life, is annihilating other human beings. Jack is not just A serial killer, he is THE serial killer. Dude makes Jeffrey Dahmer and Ted Bundy, both of whose real life exploits are alluded to via Jack’s activities in the film, look like slouches.

As von Trier likes to do, the film is divided into five chapters and an epilogue. The five chapters are each devoted to a specific murder out of the nearly hundred he commits that is supposed to make us understand why Jack does what he does. I’ll get to the epilogue later, because I have FEELINGS about it. Similarly, as von Trier also likes to do, Jack narrates these chapters in the form of a confession, in this case to a man named Verge (Bruno Ganz). With the first two chapters, von Trier catches us off guard by deploying humor. Aside from the violence, which is indeed quite brutal, von Trier manages to wring genuine laughs out of the absurdity of these situations. In the first chapter, Uma Thurman plays a rich woman with a flat tire who is so unpleasant and annoying that you can’t help but root for Jack to kill her. In the second chapter, Siobhan Fallon Hogan makes the mistake of believing Jack when he knocks on her door, first pretending to be a policeman, then incredulously switching gears and pretending to be an insurance salesman, before a comedy of errors involving Jack’s cleanliness-based OCD, a very annoyed local cop, and a telltale trail of blood ensues. The audience I saw it with tonight ate these moments up, partially laughing at the jokes themselves, then perhaps doubling down when we realized how inappropriate it was to be laughing in the first place.

However, the laughs quickly dried up once chapter three began. This chapter involved the shooting of children, and was the focus of much of the ire directed at the film after Cannes. Indeed, especially in a post-Sandy Hook world, the violence in this section was almost unbearable. Aside from seeing children gunned down in graphic detail, Jack then conducts some, shall we say, amateur taxidermy with one of the corpses, making for the second time in two films that von Trier has given us the nightmare image of a child with a horrifying rictus smile (shoutouts to the baby from Nymphomaniac Vol. II). Chapter four details the gruesome fate of Jack’s one and only girlfriend, played by Riley Keough. Von Trier ratchets up the tension here to near intolerable levels, foreshadowing a horrific act of mutilation a good ten minutes before it happens, and then showing it up close, in nauseatingly graphic detail. Most of the audience, myself included, watched this scene through our fingers.

Now, very quickly, I’ll say that, yes, for most normal moviegoers, the violence in this film will definitely be a lot. But speaking as a connoisseur of horror movies and weirdo genre experiments, it wasn’t anything outside of the ordinary. In fact, I found the violence in Antichrist to be way more upsetting and visceral than most of what you see in this film.

Chapter five sees Jack conducting a gristly experiment in his industrial freezer involving full metal jacket bullets. He also picks up a spiffy red hooded robe. This is where we catch up with the beginning of the film, and see Verge for the first time. As it turns out, Verge is here to chaperone Jack to the fires of Hell. This is where the Epilogue kicked off, and where the audience, myself DEFINITELY included, started to get a bit antsy. I seem to recall an old maxim that goes something like, you can do anything to an audience aside from bore them. Well, unfortunately, I found this Epilogue to be almost unbearably boring. Aside from some stunning imagery, it was mostly tedious and pretentious, straining for some sort of higher message that was just unnecessary. If I had to sum it up in one sentence, it would be: Tarkovsky by way of Tim and Eric. Normally that would be a compliment coming from me. All the pretty pictures in the world means nothing if the audience is reaching for their coats.

PART 3: INTENTIONS

So what is von Trier trying to tell us with all of this madness? What does he want us to take with us once we leave the theater? If you follow his filmography, it’s not a big scoop to say that von Trier’s most recent work, starting with Antichrist and continuing through Melancholia and the Nymphomaniac films, have been somewhat autobiographical, sort of his version of State of the Union addresses. The House That Jack Built feels like the culmination of this stage of his career. In this film, von Trier puts himself on trial, with Dillon’s Jack as his surrogate. Just like with the Nymphomaniac films, there are many, many, MANY flowery, pseudo-philosophical digressions on a number of topics, accompanied by slides and bits of archival video (I’ll bet someone out there is kicking themselves for ever having introduced von Trier to Shudderstock), including the poetry of William Blake, photography, love, deer hunting, gothic architecture, and Glenn Gould. One especially epic digression finds Jack opining on dessert wines, the Third Reich architect Albert Speer, and finally the artistic integrity of von Trier’s own cinematic oeuvre, complete with clips from his previous films. Ballsy, no?

I would be lying to you if I said I understood everything that von Trier was trying to convey with these digressions. However, it is definitely clear to me that this film is meant to function as sort of a statement to the jury in the court of public opinion. Von Trier has always put himself at the forefront of his films more so than most directors, displaying his name alongside, or sometimes above his actors (hell, for this film, he even devoted an entire poster to himself). This, of course, means we the audience tend to read his films as glimpses into its maker’s psyche more than we would for most other directors, which is not entirely fair in my opinion, but it’s a blessing and a curse that von Trier has brought on himself. So what does he want us to understand about himself after we’ve seen The House That Jack Built? It seems to be something along the lines of, yes, every awful thing you’ve said about me is true, and you could never hate me as much as I hate myself, but I only answer to a higher power. Which, yeah, ok...but is that enough? Or, to put it more succinctly, is that even that interesting of a conclusion? We’ve now sat through nearly ten hours of von Trier’s cinematic therapy sessions over the last decade, and he basically ends it all by pulling a Tupac on us: only God can judge me.

PART 4: MISANTHROPY

The best and most succinct description of von Trier’s modus operandi as an artist that I’ve yet to hear comes from the excellent YouTube movie review show Welcome to the Basement. During their most recent episode, while giving a (largely negative) critique of Dogville, co-host Matt Sloan describes von Trier as “a provocateur that has the talent to back it up.” Indeed, if von Trier was entirely the sum of his detractors claims, then he would’ve been forgotten a long time ago. He does indeed have the cinematic bonafides, and they don’t let him down here: the camerawork in this film is gorgeous and intimate, the editing is kinetic and fast-paced, and as usual von Trier knows just how and when to perfectly deploy a pop song for maximum disarmament.

The most resounding jibe against von Trier is that he is a raving misogynist, due to the almost ludicrously awful levels of suffering that he puts his female protagonists through. For his part, von Trier has defended himself in the past by saying he is actually fighting against the patriarchy by showing the awful trials that women must endure in a society run by men. It’s a fair, if slightly dubious claim. Personally I’ve always been kind of dumbfounded that we seem to hold von Trier to these moral standards based on the fates of his fictional characters that we just don’t with other directors. What makes him an exception in this case? Wes Anderson and Yorgos Lanthimos depict gruesome animal deaths left and right in their films, but does anyone legitimately think that they hate pets? However, when it comes to The House That Jack Built, I cannot and will not defend von Trier against these accusations of misogyny. Almost none of the female characters in the film are even given a name, and the one exception, Keough’s “Jaqueline Simple,” is derided constantly by Jack and called stupid because of her last name. It becomes especially stark and uncomfortable when, at one point, Verge observes that the women Jack has discussed strike him as “unbelievably stupid,” as if they somehow deserved to die because of that. Jack just shrugs and says that he also killed men, but he just so happened to choose these stories of killing women “at random.” Mhmmm. Not buying it this time, bucko.

Then again, you could argue that, since this story is told from the perspective of a man who unapologetically murders women in the most gruesome and debasing of ways, it would be dishonest or nonsensical to show them otherwise. But that brings up a whole other can of worms: what does it say about von Trier himself that he seems to seriously identify with a mass murderer? At one point, the film alludes to, and seemingly tries to make excuses for, the infamous press conference following Melancholia’s Cannes premiere during which von Trier compared himself to and jokingly sympathized with Hitler, an act of provocation which earned him an unofficial “ban for life” from the festival (obviously this did not last). And perhaps I’m reading too much into this, but the scene where Jack experiments with killing multiple people at once with a single full metal jacket bullet reminded me of a director at work, setting up his shot, changing the angle, making sure everything is just right, except in this instance, the camera is replaced with a high powered military grade rifle. Jack does remark at multiple times throughout the film that he sees his killings as a sort of art. Does von Trier relate to this sentiment? Does he see the creation of art as an act of love, as Verge does, or more like Jack, as an act of decay and degradation? I’m guessing more the latter than the former.

PART 5: DAMNATION

As good as Sloan’s summation of his modus operandi on Welcome to the Basement was, I have my own go-to log line: von Trier’s story is the story of a man who got everything he wished for, but was still miserable. For the first part of his career, von Trier was determined to an almost psychotic degree to be seen as one of the great auteurs of cinema. Anyone who didn’t agree was the fucking enemy. When his 1991 film Europa, which was up for the Palme d’Or at Cannes, won the Jury Prize instead, von Trier lashed out, calling that year’s jury president, Roman Polanski, “the midget” during his acceptance speech, and later hurled his trophy into the French Riviera in anger. But then his luck began to change. His next film to play in competition, 1996’s Breaking the Waves, won the Grand Prix and was nominated for an Oscar, and 2000’s Dancer in the Dark finally won him his long sought after Palme d’Or. After years of angrily bashing the world cinema establishment over the head with his own inflated opinion of himself, von Trier was finally one of the most respected and discussed filmmakers of the day.

The thing is, once you’re on top, there’s only one way you can go. He never finished his proposed “Land of Opportunities” trilogy, completing only the first two installments, Dogville and Manderlay, both of which were met with mixed to negative reviews. Von Trier soon found himself spiraling into depression and alcoholism, twin demons that he has wrestled with cinematically over the course of the last decade. It would not surprise me if The House That Jack Built was von Trier’s final film. On one hand, it feels like the thesis statement, the grand summary, of what he’s been trying to say with all of his films. On the other hand, in recent interviews, the guy just looks terrible. He’s frail, he’s got the tremors, his hair is unwashed and ratty and his clothes look ill-fitting and dirty. Despite getting sober not long after the Melancholia press conference debacle, it’s clear that alcohol abuse has taken quite a toll on him. Perhaps its gauche and inappropriate to speculate from afar on von Trier’s mortality, but he’s already done it himself, by making The House That Jack Built.

EPILOGUE: FUTILITY

Now that I’ve reached the end of this jeremiad of a review, I have to wonder, what was it all for? You’ve probably already made up your mind about whether or not you’re going to see this film. You’ve probably already got a very strong opinion on Lars von Trier, both the man and his work. Some of you are probably judging me for even having paid money to see this film, which is your right. Odds are, whatever you think about this filmmaker and his films are not going to be swayed either way by anything I have to say. And even if you did want to experience The House That Jack Built like I did, you can’t: last night was the only night that von Trier’s “Unrated Director’s Cut,” the one that screened at Cannes, is going to be shown in theaters (a stunt that has apparently landed IFC Films in hot water with the MPAA), before an R-rated version is released next month. Was this a shameless promotional ploy? Yes. Did it still give us weirdo cinephiles the feeling that we were part of a super naughty super secret club? Absolutely. I didn’t know anyone in that dark and chilly corner of Greenpoint, but I feel connected to them for life, since we all went through this cinematic journey to Hell together. So, then, now that we’ve descended into the flames, how to describe The House That Jack Built? It is vibrant and stuffy and brilliant and maddening and hilarious and terrifying and pretentious and vulnerable and prescient and infuriating and awful and a masterpiece. In other words, it is a Lars von Trier film. You know what you’re getting yourself into.

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argyle-s · 6 years

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THE SHAPE OF THINGS TO COME CHAPTER 30/38

Rating: Mature

Read at Ao3

Start at the Beginning

Vicki makes offer. Max Makes an accusation. Kara extends an invitation. Bruce and Clark both make phone calls.

Thanks to @ifourmindbeso for her great work as a beta. Any remaining mistakes are entirely my own.

Chapter 30 - Offers, Accusations and Concerns

Kara stepped out of the elevator on the forty-second floor the next morning with her eyes firmly fixed on her phone as she headed towards her office, wishing she could use the holographic interface Konex had included instead of just the touch screen. The good news was, the emails were easier to deal with than all the feelings stirred up by the previous day’s events. She hated to admit it, but a tiny little part of her was actually going to miss Livewire. They’d never exactly been Besties, but Leslie had, eventually, become her friend.

“Kara Danvers?”

Kara looked up from her phone, realizing she hadn’t been watching where she was going, and wanted to kick herself for being so distracted she didn’t notice someone in her office before she walked in. She was more than a little surprised to see who that person was. She recognized Vicki Vale immediately, of course, though photos did not do the redhead standing in her doorway justice. She picked up her glasses and slipped them on, then stood up.

“Hello,” she said.

“Hey. Sorry, I didn’t mean to intrude. I’m Vicki Vale.”

Kara nodded. “Oh course. I’ve seen your picture before.”

Vicki smiled. “One of the unfortunate side effects of recent events, I’m sure,” she said, holding out her hand.

Kara took it, giving it a firm shake. “No,” she said. “Clark Kent’s my cousin. He’s got a shot of you, Bruce Wayne, Him, and Lois at some event or other.”

“Oh, God,” Vicki said. “I know just the picture you’re talking about, and you must be horribly disappointed. I was a good ten years younger in that picture.”

“Disappointed wouldn’t be the word I’d use. The picture doesn’t do you justice at all.”

Vicki’s face lit up with an almost impish grin. “Cat told me you were talented, but she didn’t tell me what a charmer you are.”

Kara laughed and gestured to one of the chairs in front of her desk as she walked around it to sit down. “Just being honest, Miss Vale.”

“Please, call me Vicki,” she said. “And tell me, does that line work on a lot of women?”

“If I ever try it, I’ll let you know,” Kara said. “Contrary to what you might have heard from Miss Grant, I don’t date much.”

“Honestly, neither do I,” Vicki said. “I’m normally too busy figuring out which of Gotham’s politicians is taking bribes from which mobster this week.”

“Something you’re pretty good at, if the list of awards you’ve won is anything to go by.”

“A little too good, if you ask the mobsters.”

Kara noticed her reaching up to rub her side as she said it. “How’s that healing?” she asked.

Vicki looked down in surprise, as if she hadn’t realized what she was doing, and blushed slightly as she looked back up. “It’s mostly just scar tissue now, though it still aches a bit when the weather changes. Which, in Gotham, is all the time.”

“Then you’ll like National City. We might get a storm every so often, but most days, it’s nothing but sun.”

“I hear southern California’s good about that.”

“It is. So, what can I do for you?”

“Join my team,” she said, without a moment’s hesitation. “Anyone who can put together a file like that on Maxwell Lord should be in the field, as a reporter. Not sitting behind a desk, managing a twitter account.”

Kara smiled, feeling a bit of a blush in her own cheeks. “Well, I’d love to take credit for that, but I didn’t put together the file myself. I got a friend to do it.”

“Which changes my opinion not at all,” Vicki said. “If you put it together yourself, you’re a hell of a researcher. If you managed to get it from someone else, you have sources. Both of those are vital to a reporter. Plus, I saw your byline on the Reactron background piece.”

Kara blinked and shook her head. “I’d forgotten about that,” she said.

“You forgot writing an article as amazing as that?” Vicki asked.

Kara shrugged. “It’s been a busy few weeks. First, Supergirl showing up out of the blue, then arranging the interview with her for Miss Grant, then organizing the gala, and starting the S2MG. On top of all of that, I’ve been arranging the officially licensed Supergirl merchandise, getting the legal sign-off on the trust fund for the profits, helping organize the press conference for the Kryptonian Medical Foundation. Remembering something that took me twenty minutes with a google search… I’m sure you can understand.”

“You arranged the Supergirl interview, too?” Vicki asked.

“I did,” Kara said. “Took a bit of arm-twisting, but I managed to get a phone number. Once she knew who I worked for, she couldn’t agree fast enough.”

“And whose arm did you twist?” Vicki asked, which made Kara laugh so loud most of her staff turned to look at her office.

“You’re almost as bad as Cat,” Kara said, not able to keep the smile off her face or the amusement out of her voice.

“Oh, sweetie, I’m so much worse than Cat,” she said. “Cat was able to walk away from it.”

“So did you,” Kara said. “Or you wouldn’t be in an Editor’s Chair.”

“Touché,” Vicki said. “But seriously, Kara. I’ve been here three days, but I knew before I got on my plane, you belong out on the street with a press pass and a notepad. Not in here. Come on. Come join my team.”

“Give me six months,” Kara said. “Nine, tops. Once this department is up and running, and I’ve found someone who can manage it on a long-term basis, I’d love to get out there. But right now, what we’re going here is probably the most important thing happening at CatCo.”

“Seriously? Managing Supergirl’s twitter account?” Vicki asked.

“You’ll see,” Kara said with absolute confidence. “Supergirl’s been on the scene for less than two months, and she’s already changing the world.”

“You’re really that impressed with her?” Vicki asked.

“I believe in her. Enough to stake my career on all of this,” she said, gesturing to the area outside of her office.

“Well,” Vicki said. “You are every bit as impressive as Cat made you sound.”

“I will take that as a compliment,” Kara replied.

“You should,” Vicki said. “And when you’re ready to be a reporter, Kara, you come see me.”

“I look forward to it.”

“It looks like more trouble for CEO Maxwell Lord today, as rumors of further indictments spread. As viewers may recall, both the National City Tribune and the Daily Planet published new allegations of wrongdoing in an extensive series of articles yesterday. The Tribune revealed a long history of ethics violations and criminal behavior by Lord, ranging from falsifying termination papers to avoid paying unemployment, up to and including industrial espionage and human trafficking, and illegal experimentation on human test subjects.”

“Meanwhile, The Daily Planet published an exposé detailing massive irregularities in Lord Technologies’ Public Disclosures, evidence of insider trading on the part of Lord, and several board members, as well as a possible price fixing agreement with TychoTech, run by noted tech mogul Simon Tycho.”

“Sources close to federal prosecutors report that Maxwell Lord, charged last week with terrorism, conspiracy to commit terrorism, blackmail and attempted murder, along with a number of lesser charges in connection to a bombing at a lab owned by Lord Technologies, now faces a second round of indictments stemming from evidence uncovered by the Tribune and the Daily Planet.

“While no formal statement has been released by law enforcement, industry insiders are already suggesting this latest news could lead to charges against members of the Lord Technologies and TychoTech boards, as well as charges against Simon Tycho. Stock prices of both companies have already dropped drastically in the hours since the stories were published, and Lord Technologies investors are calling for Maxwell Lord’s removal from the company.”

“While neither Maxwell Lord, nor Simon Tycho could be reached for comment, both have issued press released denying all charges, and claiming this is a smear campaign organized to discredit them in the wake of their public opposition to the presence of Supergirl in National City.”

“No word yet on a response to these comments from the Girl of Steel, but CatCo has reached out to her for comment.”

“Reporting Live from Studio One here at Number One CatCo Plaza, this is Tawny Young, signing off.”

From Facebook

Supergirl Zor-El

Tuesday, November 24th, 2015

Maxwell Lord and Simon Tycho have both accused me and those who support me of organizing a smear campaign to discredit them. While I could issue a denial, and we could spend weeks playing a very public game of He Said, She Said, I will choose instead to let my actions speak for me. I did not step into the public eye seeking praise or attention. Instead, I stepped into the public eye because the people of National City Airlines Flight 237 needed help, and I was the only one who could provide it. Since then, I have sought the attention of the media, and of those with wealth or influence, not as a way to aggrandize myself, but as a way to help other refugees who find themselves stranded on a world not their own, and to share the knowledge and gifts of my people with the world as a whole.

If Mr. Lord and Mr. Tycho question why I chose the partners I did, they need only look at the histories of the companies and leaders in question, then compare them to the histories of their own companies, and their own behavior, both towards aliens who find themselves stranded on Earth’s shores, and humans who are less fortunate than themselves.

Finally, I will close by saying this. One of the stipulations I have made in all of the business dealings I have had since my first appearance as Supergirl is that I will take no profit from them. Unlike my cousin, I have chosen to issue official licenses for my likeness and merchandise which bears my name, but all profits from such merchandise go into a trust fund, where they will be held until such time as I designate a charity to receive those funds. Similarly, my share of any profits from the production and sale of any medicines and technologies derived from Kryptonian science goes into the same trust. All records are available for public review. In the time I have been Supergirl, I have accepted not one single cent for anything I have done.

I will admit that I have, on occasion, accepted food. To date, 10 large pizzas from Rosa’s Pizzeria on 6th Street (six of them Hawaiian, because pineapple on pizza is delicious) after I stopped a robbery there, Four family-sized orders of buffalo wings (Nuclear) from Benny’s Wing Shack on the corner of Lexington and 29th when I stopped a drunk driver from running through their front window, two jumbo hotdogs with extra sauerkraut and brown mustard from the cart in the Northeast Corner of CatCo plaza after I helped the owner lift the cart out of a pot hole, a dozen Churros from La Familia Market on Ponce De Leon Blvd after I stopped a robbery there, and six orders of Fried Pickles (which are surprisingly delicious) from Bubby-Lou’s Bar-B-Que on the Nation’s Bay Pier after I put out a trash fire that threatened to engulf the entire building.

I also freely admit that if someone offers me free food in the future, I will almost certainly accept it.

Perhaps, in the interest of fairness and transparency, Mr. Lord and Mr. Tycho can let the world know, in similar detail, what expressions of material gratitude they have received from those they have helped, and whether those expressions of gratitude arrived before, or after they provided the aid in question. I think their answers would be quite telling.

As are the words I have chosen to live by. Hope, help and compassion for all.

May Rao light your way.

Gordon Ramsay @GordonRamsay 24 Nov 2015

@SupergirlZorEl Pineapple does not go on top of Pizza…

Supergirl @SupergirlZorEl 24 Nov 2015

@GordonRamsay I am a great fan of your work, sir. However this is one of two points on which you are completely and unequivocally wrong. The other being Rice Pudding, which is disgusting and not food.

Gordon Ramsay @GordonRamsay 24 Nov 2015

@ SupergirlZorEl I bet I could change your mind.

Supergirl @SupergirlZorEl 24 Nov 2015

@GordonRamsay Are you offering to cook for me?

Gordon Ramsay @GordonRamsay 24 Nov 2015

@ SupergirlZorEl That was the general idea.

Supergirl @SupergirlZorEl 24 Nov 2015

@GordonRamsay Direct Message me. We’ll set something up. Now, excuse me while I go do some loops around the city while shouting with joy.

Clark frowned at his phone as he saw the name listed on the caller ID. He liked Bruce, but the man almost never called with good news, and Clark had two pans of chicken enchiladas in sour cream sauce in the oven, and enchiladas did not keep well at all.

With a sigh, and images of a missed dinner in his head, Clark hit the accept call button, and lifted his phone to his ear. “Hey, Bruce,” He said.

“Have you seen the news today?” Bruce answered.

“You do remember what I do for a living, right?” Clark asked.

“You’re a reporter at The Daily Planet,” Bruce said.

Clark closed his eyes and counted to ten in Kryptonian before answering. “Yes, Bruce, I have seen the news today. Is there a specific item of news I should be looking at more closely?”

“Tawny Young’s report on Maxwell Lord and Simon Tycho’s response to the articles published today by the National City Tribune and The Daily Planet,” Bruce said.

“I haven’t seen that segment,” Clark said as he walked over into the home office and sat at his desk. “Let me see if I can find it.”

“Don’t bother,” Bruce said. “Just check Supergirl’s facebook.”

“Oookayyy,” Clark said, pulling up Supergirl’s facebook page. It took longer for the page to load than for him to read her post. “That’s quite a response.”

“Yes,” Bruce said. “That’s what I’m worried about.”

“Bruce, can you please explain what you’re talking about? I’ve told you before, mind-reading isn’t a part of my power set.”

“Your cousin seems remarkably adept at manipulating the media in her favor,” Bruce said. “In fact, based on the way she handles her public persona, if I didn’t already know who she was, and didn’t know for a fact that Cat Grant is human, I would actually suspect Cat Grant was Supergirl.”

“That’s ridiculous,” Clark said. “Unless Georgio Armani started designing super suits.”

“I’m not saying I think Cat Grant *is* Supergirl. I know it’s Kara. Or, at least, I know it’s Kara in the suit. What I’m worried about is Cat Grant’s influence on Supergirl.”

“Kara has idolized Cat Grant for years and has been working for her for almost a year. It’s only natural that she would pick up some of Cat’s style. Besides, this is a good thing.”

“Are you sure,” Bruce said. “A Superhero with a facebook page?”

“Bruce, I’m a reporter, and you remember how much of a disaster my first few interviews as Superman were. Kara’s always been a quick study, and she had a lot of examples to draw from. Me, Diana, Ted, Hal.”

“It worries me,” Bruce said.

“Clearly,” Clark replied. “But she’s been managing the media like a champ since she gave that first interview. Why is it bothering you now?”

“Did Diana tell you about the conversation she, Kara and I had Friday about developing Kryptonian power supplies for use on Earth?” Bruce asked.

Clark frowned. “No,” he said. “Kara hasn’t really been looping me in on a lot of things. I mean, she talked to me about the Krypton Remembered website, but that was more of a ‘Hey, I’m doing this, and didn’t want it to surprise you’ conversation than asking if I thought it was a good idea. About the only thing she did ask me was if it would be okay with me if she used Kryptonian food and clothing for the CatCo release Gala. The only reason I knew about the Kryptonian Medical Foundation ahead of time is she emailed me the press packet that morning.”

“That doesn’t bother you?” Bruce asked.

“It does, but technically, Kara is the head of the House of El.”

“I thought you were,” Bruce said.

“It’s complicated,” Clark said. “My father was the head of the House, so normally, I would inherit that position, but he died before I came of age. Since Kara was of age when my father died, the title passed to her, until I actually claim it. And even then, she has the right to challenge my claim.”

“I thought she was thirteen when your father died.”

“Kryptonians come of age around twelve Earth years.”

“Do you think she would challenge you if you tried to claim head of house status?” Bruce asked.

“I honestly don’t know,” Clark said. “I don’t think so. Kryptonian tradition means a lot to Kara, and a challenge is pretty much a formal statement that she doesn’t think I’m fit to lead the House. That’s pretty serious. Especially since, if she challenged me and lost, she’d lose all standing as a member of the House.”

“What does that mean, in practical terms?” Bruce asked.

“Well, first, she couldn’t wear the coat of arms anymore, and second, she’d be required to surrender all house property. She’d lose Konex, Kolex, and her Fortess of Sanctuary. She’d lose all access to the data archives we brought with us. She’d be locked out of her travel pod. I think all that would be left to her would be her necklace.”

“If she challenged you, could you win?” Bruce asked.

“Probably,” Clark said. “As the challenged, I have the right to choose the type of contest. It would almost have to be combat though. If I picked anything else, she’d wipe the floor with me.”

“What other kind of challenge is there?” Bruce asked.

“There are three challenges. The Challenge of Intelligence, The Challenge of Wisdom, and The Challenge of Strength.”

“You’re saying she’s smarter than you?”

“I don’t know if she’s got more raw intelligence. By human standards, she and I are both more than three standard deviations above the mean, but she’s the one with a Kryptonian education, and the equivalent of about ten PhD’s. All I’ve got is a journalism degree from Metropolis University, and what Jor-El could cram on a Kryptonian thumb drive. Same with the Challenge of Wisdom. It’s all tied up in Kryptonian culture and philosophy. On the other hand, I’m a master of Torquasm Rao, and she’s only trained to the first level in Klurkor, and as far as I know, hasn’t practiced seriously since she left Krypton. I know Alex has been teaching her Krav Maga since she went public as Supergirl, but that’s just a few weeks’ training.”

“What happens to you if she wins the challenge?” Bruce asked.

“I lose any right to claim status as the head of House. Essentially, my line would become the cadet branch of the family. In theory, if she chose to, she could expel me from the House at that point, but that’s almost never done. Bruce, what is all this about?”

“She suggested hiring Lena Luthor to help develop Kryptonian power supplies for sale on Earth.”

“SHE WHAT?” Clark yelled.

“She suggested hiring Lena Luthor to help develop Kryptonian power supplies for sale on Earth,” Bruce repeated, in the exact same tone he’d said it before.

Clark took off his glasses and pinched the bridge of his noise. “Lois and I are going to National City tomorrow morning for Thanksgiving. I’ll talk to her then and find out what the hell she’s thinking.”

“Be prepared for an argument,” Bruce said.

“Right,” Clark said. “I’m hanging up now.”

“Okay,” Bruce said.

Clark cut the connection to Bruce and pulled up Diana’s number to find out what the hell had actually happened.

Kara looked up at the sound of approaching footsteps and smiled at the sight of Cat Grant making her way towards her office door.

“Hello, Miss Grant,” she said.

“Hello, Kiera,” Cat said as she sat down in one of the chairs in front of Kara’s desk.

“You’re here late,” Kara said.

“So are you. I thought you were taking off early because your family is in town for Thanksgiving.”

“That was the plan, but every time Supergirl makes a Facebook post, it’s like someone sets my entire calendar on fire.”

“Yes, well, our girl does seem to be making quite the splash, doesn’t she?”

“I’m pretty sure that incident in the bay this afternoon was just a misunderstanding,” Kara said, grinning.

“Oh, I’m sure. I mean, it was purely a coincidence that Supergirl splashed Simon Tycho, and only Simon Tycho when she did a flyby of his yacht.”

“She was on her way to a warehouse fire in Nation’s Bay,” she said, trying not to laugh, despite the amused twinkle in Cat’s eyes.

“I’m sure,” Cat said. “I heard someone had a visit from Vicki this morning.”

“I did,” Kara said. “She tried to convince me to give up all of this,” Kara said, waving to their surroundings, “to go be a reporter.”

“You would make a hell of a reporter, Kara,” Cat said.

Kara nodded. “I would,” she said. “And someday, I will. But if I’m honest, there’s a part of me that wishes I was still fetching your latte’s and organizing your schedule.”

Cat smiled at her. “I wish you were, too,” she said.

“Is there a problem with Jackson?” Kara asked, frowning.

“Just that he isn’t you,” Cat said. “I’ll never admit it to anyone, but my day feels a little emptier without someone sending me some inane cat video.”

“Oh, well, if it’s just the cat videos, I’m sure I can add that to his list of duties,” Kara said.

“He also can’t keep a latte hot,” Cat said.

Kara just grinned, deciding not to push any further, even though she knew exactly what Cat was getting at.

“How’s our girl handling her new status as a gay icon?” Cat asked.

“It’s a little overwhelming,” Kara said. “Out, the Advocate, Curve, Autostraddle and AfterEllen all keep begging for interviews, which makes me wish we had the lesbian-focused magazine and website already spun up, and some of the negative comments are enough to make anyone want to shoot lasers out of their eyes. Maybe a bit shocked that the President actually issued a statement about it.”

“I thought Oliva was very supportive,” Cat said.

“Yeah, it’s just… You know, having your private life on display like that isn’t easy.”

“No, it isn’t,” Cat said. “I remember the first time a paparazzi got pictures of me on a date. I didn’t want to leave the house for a week.”

“That’s hard to imagine,” Kara said.

“It was right after I started my first talk show,” Cat said. “Naturally, I adapted, but it was hard, at the time. People say things, cruel things, about public figures. I just hope Supergirl knows that the people who care about her won’t believe them, and the people that believe them aren’t worth caring about.”

“Well, I will pass along the message, Miss Grant. But I think, given her little speech on Leslie’s show, she knows whose opinions should be given weight.”

“I hope so,” Cat said.

“How about you, Miss Grant? You and Carter have your Thanksgiving plans all settled?”

“Oh, no. I don’t do Thanksgiving,” Cat said. “Carter spends it with his father, so I just come in and work.”

“I’m sorry,” Kara said.

“It’s okay. I get him for Christmas.”

“You should come to my place!” Kara said.

“Don’t be ridiculous,” Cat said.

“I’m not,” Kara said. “It’ll be fun. Besides, James will be there, and Clark.”

“Which means Lois,” Cat said. “I’ll pass.”

“Oh, come on, Cat,” Kara said, bouncing a little in her seat. “You can spend the whole time rubbing it in her face that *your* Superhero let you sponsor her entire social media presence, and you’ve got inside access to the first out lesbian superhero.”

“Well, that does make it sound tempting,” Cat said.

“Come on!” Kara said, putting just a little bit of wheedling into her voice. “I bet I could even talk Supergirl into doing a cover shoot for the next issue of the magazine. It could be another feature. ‘The Out Girl From Outer Space.’”

“Well, we know who won’t be writing any headlines any time soon.”

“It sounded better in my head,” Kara said, not able to stop from giggling just a little.

“I should let you get going,” Cat said, standing up.

“I’ll text you my address,” Kara said, “In case you change your mind.”

Cat smiled at her. “Good night, Kara,” she said, then turned and headed for the elevator.

Kara didn’t stop smiling the whole way home.

#supergirl #supercat #supercanary #sanvers #fanfiction #the shape of things to come #kara danvers #alex danvers #cat grant #maggie sawyer #sara lance #j'onn j'onzz #susan vasquez #lois lane #clark kent #james olsen #winn schott jr.#future shock

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taronfanfic · 6 years

Text

Graduate’s Escape

Chapters 1-10 are here

Chapter 11

The next week had flown by surprisingly quickly. Taron had started off in South Korea and the 9 hour time difference had turned out to be a bonus. As you woke up each morning Taron had just finished his interviews for the day and was making his way back to the hotel for a bit of down time. You facetimed him from the comfort of your bed and listened to him as he enthusiastically recalled the amusing anecdotes from the day. They usually involved him trying his best to embarrass Colin Firth or make him laugh during an interview. He seemed like his usual happy self, albeit a coffee fuelled jetlagged version.

As the end of the second week appeared things had changed. Taron had evening events and the main film premier which wiped out your time for contact. He’d text you to let you know what he was doing, but he’d never asked if you were ok, never said he missed you, never even asked what you were up to. Not that you had any plans. It was your day off and exactly 2 weeks since you’d last seen him. The roses on your breakfast bar were looking as alive as your love life currently felt. You were moping and you knew it. The largest painting in your art room had remained untouched for days now. You considered shutting yourself away and putting in some hours to the canvas, but you knew you weren’t in the right mind-set. If anything you’d rather be at the bar.

Y/N: You doing anything tonight? X

Emily: Just my usual Saturday night, mentally dating the cute pizza delivery guy and watching Netflix. X

Y/N: Fancy some company? X

Emily: Is someone missing lover boy? X

Y/N: Like mad, but I don’t think it’s mutual. X

Emily: Shit - bring wine! X

If there was one person on the planet who was guaranteed to have the answer to all your problems it was Emily. She has this amazing way of knowing whether you need worldly advice, a shoulder to cry on, or a hilarious distraction instead. She lives in a shared house with a few of her old Uni friends. You were convinced that she and James were a couple when you first met but they’ve both sworn nothing has ever happened between them. It will one day though, once their heads have been bashed together.

“Here she is!” Emily greeted you with a warm hug and invited you through to the living room. “Now tell me what’s going on? You were fine last week… or this just because you’ve finally come down from cloud nine after your last date?” She poured you a large glass of wine and sat down at the opposite end of the sofa.

“I don’t really know. Nothing’s actually happened, but it all just feels… different?” You questioned your own words.

“Different?” Emily repeated as she tried to get you to explain.

“I guess… I feel more like his mate? Since he’s been away his texts have been brief and to the point. There’s no jokes or flirting anymore.”

“Not even any filthy photos?”

“None. It’s weird, and I don’t like it.”

He’s probably just busy, or jetlagged?” Emily went straight to the most logical explanation. “He wouldn’t be all romantic, buy you roses and drag out saying goodbye for ages if he just wanted to be friends!”

“It wasn’t really a long goodbye, actually.”

“But I thought that was why you were late to work? You couldn’t bear to let each other go.” She outstretched her arms dramatically as she mock acted every rom-com going.

“Ha, no. I was late long before we’d got to that point… it was a very long shower.” You gave her a wink and said no more, watching on as she shook her head in jealousy.

“So do you actually miss him, or just the sex?”

“Good question. I don’t know… I should say him, shouldn’t I?” You felt bad for not being confident in your answer. You knew already that you missed the sex, but was that because it was with Taron or not?

“You don’t have to… I think I know what might help you decide though. Fancy a little trip out?”

“Where to?”

“You’ll see…” Emily gave nothing away as she ushered you out the door and down the street, looking something up on her phone as she walked. “We’re in luck!” she declared as she locked her phone and put it back in her bag. You took a left turn onto the main road and headed towards the busier part of town. The neon signs of clubs and take away shops lit the street, but nestled between them was a smaller old fashioned cinema entrance. Emily showed the booking receipt on her phone to the man at the entrance and grabbed two small bags of popcorn.

“What are we watching?” You asked her, wondering why this was her brilliant idea. “I thought this place only showed the old classics?”

“It does normally, unless there’s a big new release out…” she not-so-subtly hinted.

“No, you haven’t!”

“It’s too late now, I’m not letting you leave.” The lights dimmed and the audience hushed, allowing you to hear the flicker of the film reel behind you. The Kingsman: The Golden Circle appeared on screen, shortly followed by Taron’s clean shaven, glasses wearing face. As much as your heart knew it was him, recognising his gorgeous eyes and tempting looking soft lips, your head couldn’t put two and two together with the accent and mannerisms. It was weird to watch. But it was also a true testament to his talent as an actor, which you knew held no bounds. You felt proud of him, inspired by him, but most importantly you knew you missed him.

***

“So did that help?” Emily asked as you left the cinema.

“I really miss him.” You admitted. “I just want to know why he’s being so different now we’re not together.”

“What was he like when you left him? When you actually said goodbye?”

“The last thing he said was ‘don’t give your number out to any more guys at work’.”

“Wait! So he unofficially made things official then? ... He doesn’t want you to date anyone else!” The excitement in Emily’s voice made everything become very clear.

“Shit.” You stopped dead in your tracks.

“Y/N, what did you say back him?”

“Oh I’ve fucked this up.” You sighed as it hit you hard. “I said ‘no promises’, but I was kidding. You know what I’m like! No wonder he’s been off with me… He’s gone and confessed his feelings, asked me to be loyal to him whilst he’s away and I might as well have just shrugged in his face and said ‘not going to happen’. Fuck.” You dropped your head into your hands as you started to cry.

“No, no no no.” Emily rubbed your arm supportively. “This is still saveable, you just need to talk to him about it and explain.”

“It’s going to be too late for that. He’ll be over me by the time he comes back.” Your tears fell quickly down your cheeks as you replayed your last moments with him in your mind. Watching back all your mistakes hurt and you could now see exactly what you should have said and done. Hindsight’s an unhelpful friend.

“Text him!” Emily ordered.

“I can’t tell him how I feel by text. It’s not the same, I need to see him!”

“I don’t think you have much choice here Y/N, he’s half way around the world!”

“I’ll get a flight then!” You argued back, determined that you needed to be face to face with Taron before you could tell him how you felt.

“You’re mad! That’ll cost a fortune, and what about work? They’ll sack you if you just disappear for a week!”

“Cover for me? Tell them I’m ill, I’ve had my appendix out or something. Please, Emily. I need to go and see him.” You begged her.

“Y/N, this is insane. Come back to mine and we can talk this through, form a better plan.” She tried to calm you down.

“I don’t need a better plan, I just need you to cover for me. Please Emily, I’m actually begging you.” You placed your hands on her shoulders as you asked her again, looking straight into her eyes so she couldn’t avoid answering you.

“Ok, fine, I’ll cover for you. But only because I know how stubborn you are. I still think you could sort it all out over the phone, but if you want to fly to China or wherever then I can’t stop you!”

“Thank you!” You pulled her in to a tight hug. “I need to go and pack, I’ll be on the first flight out tomorrow and I’ll let you know exactly what happens. Promise!”

“Good luck!” She called as you darted across the road and disappeared down the steps of the nearest tube station.

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