#don't argue because i promise you can't change my mind on this | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

sickuma · 10 months

Text

SILLAGE — a Simon Riley fic. 2/2

❱ again this was an au first written on tiktok! this will be the last part of it, please keep in mind that it is all fiction and that if you're going through the same thing and are having the same thoughts, please seek someone you trust. Please fight for yourselves, you're worth it ꜝ？ Warning. . this is a heavy angst fic, mentions of suicide and acts of committing, if that is something that triggers bad emotions, please exit the fic.

paring is Ghost x Reader this is unedited! mistakes such as spelling and grammatical errors are to be expected !

Part 1 (^_^;)

SILLAGE — (n.) The scent that lingers in air, the trail left in water, the impression made in space after something or someone has been and gone; the trace of someone's perfume.

—hey [name]? I know I'm the last person you want to hear from right now, but I just really—

There was a short pause, as the voicemail erupts a slight static sound.

—I love you. That should have been enough reason. No, you were enough. I'm so sorry. I'm sorry I was cowardly, I figured that you'll be happier and safer, being with someone who isn't me. Someone who isn't a soldier.

It was the same night he left your apartment. He swore to himself he would not come crawling back. To protect both of you, at the time, it had been the best solution for him. Until the midnight strikes, he remembered just how serious you looked, just how accepting you looked.

Too accepting.

—because who knows when one of these missions would finally take me out. I can't let you suffer through that, I can't be the one to give you that kind of grief. So I thought leaving you was the best option.

There was a dire pause as he thought of the best words possible to express himself. He’s never been one to do such, but for you, he’s willing to be better.

—it wasn't.

He spoke desperately, almost shaking from just how much adrenaline rushed through him. He had just argued with the team, and after a long hour of explaining to them what he needed to do, he was finally permitted to bail out on this mission, it’s not like he wouldn't leave without permission, that's how urgent this is for him, he needed to get to you as soon as possible,

Even he doesn't know why he’s in a rush,

Maybe it's because of your silence, the unanswered calls, and unread messages that brought him on edge.

—I love you, far too much, my love, to even think straight without you. I love you so much it's hard to breathe. I so desperately love you to the point it hurts.

The desperation and sincerity. It was all there. He knew if he couldn't let it out now, he won't let it out ever. This was his only chance of being happy.

You were his only chance for happiness. He almost couldn't believe he thought letting you go because of his fear was the best decision.

He stupidly let you go, succumbing to the fear of dying while you wait for him. He knows better, he will do better,

For you. Because you're worth changing for, you're worth the risk.

—please don't hate me. I know I was an ass for leaving in the first place, baby, I am sorry. You loved me so much that it felt so good, I didn't know I'm capable of feeling that way, so I was scared that worse would come after. I'm not scared anymore. You looked at me like there's something in me worth looking at,

He felt like he was saying so much yet so little at the same time,

He had so much to tell you but very few words to express it. He needs to be with you. He needs to see you and physically explain to you just how much you mean to him.

—I won't waste it, love, not again. Please open the door for me when I get back.

He frowned, realizing once again just how idiotic he was. He knew he should not have done what he did, but it was over with. The only thing left to do is to make things right somehow.

—I've never been taught how to love, I have.. I don't— I'm not the best at it. I'm sorry baby, if I'm not loving you the right way, and for leaving just like that, but I promise I'll be better. you're worth the better of me, you're worth learning love for.

He needed you, and you needed him. That should have been enough reason to risk it.

—when I come back, please let me hold you. Please forgive me for making you feel like an option between my job. It's you. It's always been you. I love you, baby, wait for me. I'll make this right.

As the line cuts, the static sound fills the eerie room of yours. The very same room he had walked out from, the same room where you sat breathing hours ago. There were no other living sounds except for the occasional ticking of the clock.

There were no signs nor sounds of life perceived in the room. The silence was thick. With your lifeless body beside the bed in a fetal position, a bottle of used pills tightly wrapped around your hands. It was light, about three to four pills left inside a newly bought bottle.

It was dead silent as if the universe sympathized with you.

Allowing silence in regards to respect for what has passed, for what has ended.

﹑

“My family’s never been the typical joyous family, I guess that affected me, as a person in general.”

You explain, running your hand through his hair while his head laid on your lap. It’s one of those days where he’d be much affectionate compared to the majority of the time. He requested to hear about your childhood while he rests on you,

For a moment you felt your heart and breath hitch.

“I guess growing up in that kind of household really—really influenced my well-being. It's given me problems and worries I shouldn't have.” You were hesitant to continue, “Fear, I started having fears for a lot of things.”It's as if you caught a glimpse of his mind, taking in the details you've just given him.“Fears like?”

The moment the question reached your ears, he could see your body tense. He understood, and he doesn't plan on pushing it.“You don't have to answer that, my love.” he smiles, “No matter what it is you're scared of, let’s face it together, yeah? You have me. That's enough, I hope.”

Little did he know that fear was yet to come. The fear of leaving soon, the fear of being unable to keep going. How could you ever explain to him that you don't plan to stay long?

﹑

With a ragged breath from exhaustion, he dropped his things once again, the same way he did before he left. Facing your door yet again, panting as a feeling of discomfort plagued him, why exactly? He’s finally here. Why is he so distraught, he wondered.

“[name]?” he knocks,

Swallowing the lump in his throat, his voice strained, and his state dishevelled. “[name] please—it’s me, please answer.”

The lack of response made him think about just how angry he made you,

“I'm sorry,” he whispers,

“I know I was stupid and irrational. I won't do it again, petal, please open the door.”

To say he’s nervous would be an understatement. What would he do if you never find it in you to let him back into the comfort of your arms? Will he return to the familiar cold he had forgotten when he met you?

“[name] I love you.”

He desperately spoke, yearning for an answer; the smallest sign of acceptance.

It was odd. How quiet it was. Are you that mad? He wonders, but then again, he knew you’re not one to ignore, not even when you’re the angriest you've been. You would never shut him out, not ever. “[name], please, answer, or I'll have to go inside.”

“Baby are you okay?” no response.

Each passing second was like a countdown. He was uneasy and distraught. Afraid even.

The silence felt deafening. He was afraid of what? He had no clue what he was so afraid of, surely you're okay...

Right?

“[name], I'm coming in,” he says sternly, fishing the spare key he oh so gratefully forgot to give back. His heart thumps louder with each action.

The moment he entered, the creak of the door interrupted the silence. He felt like he was intruding on an abandoned space. It felt wrong. He knew something was wrong.

“[name]? I'm back, like—like I always am.” his voice broke, stepping inside, head looking around, hoping to find you and engulf you in his longing arms. “As I told you, I’ll always find my way back… right?”

He kept speaking while he walked, checking and opening every door. Starting from the small kitchen to the bathroom, checking everywhere until there was one room left. He dreaded it, for no reason he was scared and yet he rushed,

He spoke, no—he goes on a tangent,

“I'll take the month off. We’ll do anything you want, anything to make up for this. I promise we can even get a pet, I always say no, right? This time, I'll agree, anything for you, my love just—”

The silence rung,

Apart from the sound of the door opening by his force, there were no sounds made, not from him, not from anything. He simply stood, dumbfounded at what the room unveiled; at that moment, nothing mattered, not even the breath he had held unknowingly.

A ragged chuckle escaped his lips, though it was hollow. As if he was desperate to know that maybe this is all some sick prank. Maybe this was one of your silly games he always put up with, “Baby? What’s this? Why are you on the floor?”

“Jokes over [name] get up—”

When it all came to view, he was silenced. The second he stepped closer, he saw how your body lay lifeless, how you held that bottle, and how his eyes drifted onto the lone tear, which evidently dried along the hours.

How long have you been here?

In this state? How long has it been since you left him?

He couldn't feel. He couldn't grasp his head around the sight before him. He’s well familiar with death. He’s seen it before, and he’s lost comrades before, but nothing comes close to what lay in front of him.

How does one react when their lifeline lies lifeless before their very eyes?

He couldn't approach nor speak. He simply stood with weak knees, tempting to give out. It didn't take him long to crouch, eyes wide open with lips parted slightly. There were no tears, no emotions, the moment numbed him. It didn't feel like reality,

There he crouched, just a few steps away from you. It didn't feel like his heart dropped. It felt almost worse, as if you'd taken it with you. How could this have happened? Did he cause this?

If you had told him a day ago that he would witness the person he loved the most laying on the floor devoid of life, he would have laughed at your face, punching you even. This isn't reality. This isn't a reality he wants to face.

It took every courage in his body to bring himself closer to you, afraid of what more he’d discover. With slow steps, he drew closer, grabbing your hand was the first thing he thought of doing. “Oh god…” his voice broke,

Your body isn't as warm as it used to be,

Not as he remembered. The warmth he loved when he would hold you against him, it’s gone. You're gone.

He had felt countless of stiff lifeless bodies and yet yours hurt the most,

The mere thought of it destroyed him. It hasnt sinked in yet, but he could tell. He could tell his demise is near. The realization will hit him in a short while.

“Baby, im home…” this wasn't him. This was not his voice. Stuttering over the easiest words, strained with pent-up sobs. His chest felt heavy, almost making it difficult to breathe.

Yet with hitched breath, he picked up your limp body and placed you in his arms, crushing your icy body against him. He held you tightly, but his hands cradled your body tenderly. It was as if he’s afraid of hurting you more.

Ghost was forever fearless, always facing whatever challenge was given to him, even his mortal enemy would know that he isnt necessarily the easiest solder to crack, let alone destroy and yet he finds himself sat on the floor holding the lifeless frame of his lover,

Cradling whatever is left of you,

Desperately holding onto what he can possibly hold on to.

The lieutenant everyone looked up on, admired and viewed as an admirable man, sat on the floor with a weighing heart. Holding back the tears that had formed without his knowledge as he held your body,

but right now, he wasn't lieutenant simon ‘ghost’ riley.

At this moment, he was just simon, the simon you loved desperately, the simon who loved you just as insanely.

This person right this moment was your simon,

He wasnt anyone else, he was yours.

As he sat on the hard cold floor, thoughts roaming with his heart screaming, he felt like a mess, but that didn't matter. Words can not describe the regret, remorse, and stupidity he felt,

If i didnt leave,

If i didn't walk out that door,would you still have been alive in my arms?Would i still have to hold you soulless?

He held you closer, bringing you closer to him, as close as possible. He felt nothing but regret, nothing but anger for himself. Why is it that the very grief he tried to protect you from, the same reason he left, the same grief he avoided you to feel, why is it that he’s feeling it now?

His ragged sobs filled the room, and the rest remained still as if everything sympathized for him. As if the world understood the hurt he carried. He sobs, holding onto you as if doing so would bring you back. He knew nothing well, and yet he foolishly cried, hoping you’ll hear him and come back to ease the pain.

Like you always did.

At the corner of his eyes, he saw the letters piled not far from them. Without standing, nor letting go of you, he reached for it. Reading the names addressed on each, until he sees the one for him.

Of all the few letters he saw, his was the only one with tear drops which ruined the ink in front, almost unable to read, he brought it closer, dropping the rest.

Simon,

I felt everything.

Thank you, and im sorry,

I love you :)

Swallowing the impossibly heavy lump on his throat, he opened the carefully folded letter. He was met with even more tear drops. The thought of you crying, alone, while you write him a letter to bid him goodbye, crushed his soul.

He cant imagine a greater pain,

It felt surreal.

How could I..

How could I have lost you this easily.

With his blurry vision, he starts to read—well—attempt to. With every sentence, every punctuation, every meaning of your words, all of it felt like a slap to reality.

How could he have not seen?

How did he not notice? Not paying attention to what you were going through? How could he have been so careless as to leave you all alone.

The very fear you spoke of,

He did just exactly what your family had done.

If anybody could have saved me,

it would have been you.

He read the part over and over again, allowing your words to cut through his heart repeatedly. He left you, and yet, at the end of the day, you still see him as someone—the only one who could save you.

Despite the war inside your mind,

Inside your mind and unwavering emotions, which he hadn't bothered to unveil, he remained the most important person.

May it be in your chaotic mind or the furthest crevices of your heart, he remained on both.

He read it all,

Understanding every single thing you failed to say in person,

Everything you failed to say while you still lived.

It hurts even more. He thought nothing could be more painful when he saw you laying lifeless. But having to read what you wanted to say,

How sorry you were, how thankful you are to him, and how he made you feel.

It was surely another cut to an already existing wound. His mind flashed memories while he went over the tear stained letter you left.

He remembered everything as if they were as fresh as yesterday. When you first smiled at him, when you first held hands, when your lips first touched.

Your words were true. The story of you really is short-lived. But he couldn't help but think about the what If's

If he stayed,

If he hadn't walked out,

If he ignored his fear of abandoning you,

If he hadn't been so stupid and cowardly.

He gave up, and the heavy lump on the throat overcame him, letting the sting linger for as long as eternity. He read the last words on the letter, with a loud sob, with repeated pleads.

Repeatedly apologising, repeatedly begging for you to come back so he could fix things so everything could return to normal,

So you could return.

A childish wish. A high-ranking soldier held the lifeless body of his lover all while he begs for them to come back.

"I'm so sorry." He whispers, voice too broken to speak normally. "I'm sorry for not noticing."

"I'm sorry you had to be alone."

"I'm so sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry." He repeats over and over again, holding you against him.

At the back of the letter, he could barely see the words written with how blurry the tears clouded his eyes.

Thank you for making me feel.

The words only crushed him even more, sobbing and crying harder to no avail.

"[name]..." He whispers, holding you close. "Did it hurt? I'm sorry, it must have been so hard."

"I'm sorry."

"I'm so sorry for not being here you."

He apologized, wishing he could have been with you. To convince you otherwise, wishing he could have been here to avoid this,

To avoid losing you.

Wishing he could have stayed to keep making you feel.

The thoughts of your words before he left suddenly entered his mind,

"Can I hug you?"

"One last time?"

Now it all makes sense why you looked so serene, why you looked so accepting. Why did you have that small smile on your lips,

You were bidding him goodbye.

That really was the final hug.

The final touch he'd ever get, the final living affection he would get from you.

He holds you now, but it wasn't the same, not even close. Back then, you were smiling and breathing, but now you're no different to an inanimate object. Stiff and cold, this is the person he loved so dearly?

It ached.

And it ached painfully.

The type of ache to never go away, the type of ache he'd keep forever.

The type of ache he'll willingly embrace,

As he held you that night, mourning for what could've been, mourning for someone beyond saving.

This was the ache he'd willingly feel forever,

If it means having you in his mind and heart. He would willingly hurt himself by keeping that ache if it means keeping you in his deceased heart forever.

As the remnant of your memories roamed the room, your presence which now passed, the scent of yours he dearly craved. It left a sillage pain to remember,

You left a sillage worth remembering.

"I'll keep you in my heart,

Even if that damage me,

Even if it kills me.

I'll keep you safe forever."

1K notes · View notes

auras-moonstone · 2 months

Text

passionate as sin — ethan landry

word count: 2.6k

pairing: camp counselor!ethan landry x camp counselor!fem!reader

summary: ethan and y/n find out that kissing is more passionate when hatred is involved and fraternising is considered a sin.

warnings: none!

The rivalry between Garden Gate Camp and Holiday House Camp was something exciting for the campers and dreading for the owners. Y/N's family camp had existed for way too long, due to it being a family legacy. And then, just a few short years ago, the Landrys appeared in the picture to make their lives a mess by setting their camp right next to theirs. While the newest one was more advanced and modern, the other one was cozier and homier.

To summerise it, the business competition created hatred and enmity between these two families, especially between the dads—although Y/N and Ethan came in close second.

The two teenagers have spent their summers arguing and pulling pranks on each other ever since they met. One would think that now, being 20-year-olds, they would've grown out of a prank war that started when they were 15.

"Nice shirt! Your dad will love it." the curly-haired boy laughed once Y/N stepped out of the dressing room.

"You're a pervert, I was showering!" Y/N hit him with her wet towel, causing him to whimper in pain.

The boy had sneaked into the dressing room and changed her Garden Gate Camp counselor t-shirt for a Holiday House Camp one. "Don't worry, I made sure to hear the water running before I got in. Let me take a pic, this will be good for our socials."

"You put your phone near my face and I'll make you swallow it." Y/N said between gritted teeth.

"Fine, fine." he put his phone back on his pocket. "You look good in that shirt."

"You could've at least given me the right size." she groaned as she tried to fix the shirt that barely reached her belly button and was tight as leather. "I don't think I can get out of it. For real."

"I'll gladly help you with that." Ethan smirked, which motivated her to hit him with the heavy towel again. "Ouch! Y/N, it's a wet towel, it fucking hurts."

"That's why I'm hitting you with it, Einstein!"

"Whatever." Ethan said rubbing his arm. "There's a party tonight, at my camp. You and your friend are invited."

Y/N frowned. "First of all, why the hell are you inviting me? Second, I'd rather die than get caught at your stupid party."

"I'm not inviting you because I want to." he scoffed, as if the implication of wanting her there was ridiculous. "My friend, Anika, is interested in your friend Mindy and she asked me to invite her. I assume she wouldn't like going alone, so you can go too, I guess."

"So thoughtful." she rolled her eyes. "No promises."

"So you won't go?" Ethan asked.

Y/N's shoulders slumped. "I guess I will, but just because Mindy is interested in her too."

"Awesome." the boy said with fake enthusiasm. "Party starts at midnight."

"Can't wait." she showed him her fakest smile.

"By the way, I wasn't lying. You really do look good in that shirt." he said before leaving.

Y/N walked away, cheeks on fire. He was an irritating, infuriating, exhasperating asshole. But he was also hotter than hell, which made him even more annoying because she couldn't help but feel heated by his words.

Y/N and Mindy managed to sneak in through the fence that separated both camps. The owner's daughter still couldn't comprehend why it had been necessary for the Landrys to set a camp just right next to another one. But oh well, it was what it was.

"There they are." Y/N tilted her head towards Anika and Ethan, who were doing their job as counselors in one corner.

"Hey, thanks for doing this." Mindy said as they made their way to them.

“Of course, Minds. I know how much you like her.”

“I was hoping you’d change your mind.” Ethan spoke with an exaggerated tone of disappointment when the girls reached them.

“And pass the opportunity to annoy you in your own territory? No way.” Y/N flashed him a venomous smile before turning to Anika. “Hey, Ani. Nice to see you.”

“Nice to see you too, Y/N/N” she smiled sweetly. Despite the rivalry Y/N had with her friend, she had always been super kind to Anika. “Want to dance, Minds?”

“Sure.” Mindy looked at Y/N, silently asking her if she was okay with it. Y/N sent her a subtle nod, and both girls got lost amongst the campers.

“They’re cute together.” Y/N said.

“They are.” Ethan agreed. He passed her a can of beer, which she thanked with a nod.

“You know, it took two people’s help to get me out of that shirt.”

“And sadly, I wasn’t one of them.” he made a clicking sound with his tongue while shaking his head.

“That’s the second time you mention wanting to get my shirt off me. Are you that desperate?” Y/N smirked, taking a sip of her drink.

Ethan eyed the way her throat moved as she swallowed “And you blush every time I mention it. Are you that desperate?” he mirrored her smirk and took a sip of his beer too. His lips were glistening, soaked by the drink, and for a moment the sight left Y/N in a trance.

She hadn’t noticed how tempting his lips were. They were round and full, and she got the sudden urge to trace them with her finger and feel how soft they were. Y/N looked up and their eyes met. Ethan had caught her eyeing his lips, but he didn’t look smug like she would’ve expected. Instead, he held her stare with intensity and she noticed them turn darker.

The air instantly got thick, their skins turned hot and breaths turned uneven. Their bodies stiffened, feeling their hearts accelerating and a swarm of electricity ran from the top of their heads right to the tip of their toes.

Their magnetic field grew stronger with the passing of seconds, until the mood was broken when something bumped against Y/N’s shoulder, making her fall into Ethan’s side.

“Shit, sorry. Tripped over my own feet.” the guy apologised. He was tall, though not as tall as Ethan. He had short dark brown hair that fell to the sides of his face like a curtain, and an amazing bone structure. He was handsome and Y/N wondered why that camp was filled with such good-looking people.

“It’s okay.” Y/N smiled weakly. She didn’t know if she should be glad or mad that the moment was ruined.

“I’m James, camp counselor.” the guy presented himself. He inspected her face carefully. “Wait, aren’t you Y/N? From Garden Gate?”

“Yup, if you tell anyone you saw me here, I’ll kill you.”

The boy laughed. It was deep and rough, extremely attractive. “My lips are sealed. But I’ll be extra careful if you accept dancing with me.”

Y/N could feel Ethan’s eyes on the side of her face, expectant to hear her answer. James was gorgeous, and in other circumstances she wouldn’t have hesitated, but right now she wasn’t dying to dance with him. On the other hand, if she stayed with Ethan, she’d have to acknowledge the strange moment that happened between them.

“Just for a bit, I’m not much for dancing.” she finally said. And when she felt Ethan’s stare on her back as she walked away with James, part of her regretted her decision.

“What the fuck was that?” Ethan asked, leaning against the wall next to the doorframe, when Y/N exited the bathroom. She had excused herself from the dance floor, leaving James alone, and Ethan took his opportunity to get the irrational anger off his chest.

“You’ll have to be more specific, Landry.”

“You, dancing with James. Didn’t your father teach you not to fraternise with the enemy?” his jaw was clenched and his body burning with rage.

Y/N rolled her eyes. “Anika is also fraternising with the enemy, yet I don’t see you mad over that.”

She had a point. Truth was, he had wanted to punch James so badly when he saw his hands gripping Y/N’s waist and the way she was smiling up at him as she swayed her hips in such an hypnotic way. Ethan didn’t know what was going on with him, but he knew that he and Y/N had an undeniable chemistry. And he wanted to dive into it.

“You’re right.” Ethan said after a few seconds.

“Great. Can you move?” Y/N asked, as his tall frame was blocking the door.

He didn’t budge. “You’re not going back to him.” Ethan stated calmly.

Y/N scoffed. “Why do you care if I go back to him or not?”

Ethan took a step closer, leaving them chest to chest. Y/N had to tilt her head up to look at him properly. Her confused eyes made contact with his darkened ones. The kind of dark that made Y/N’s insides melt. She set her hands on his hard chest, while his found her hips.

None of them knew who got rid of the distance, nor did they care. The only thing that mattered was that their lips were pressed together in one heated, breathtaking and passionate kiss.

They kissed like they were liberating the tension they had been accumulating through the years, like they were letting out the anger that every prank, insult, glare and hurtful comment had made them feel. They kissed like it was something they had been wanting to do for a long time and never realized—or never wanted to realize.

“Hate you so much.” Y/N slurred between kisses as she grabbed him by the collar of his shirt and pulled him inside the bathroom, pining him to the now closed door. “You’re so good at this. I hate you.”

“I hate you more. Seeing you with someone else makes me furious, and I hate you for that.” he descended his kisses to her neck, collarbone and shoulders. Those kisses were softer and slower, as if he just wanted to feel her skin with his lips.

“I hate that your lips are soft and that I’m already addicted to them.” she said as she played with the hair on the nape of his neck.

“I hate how many times I’ve dreamt about this, and I hate even more that this is better than anything I’ve ever imagined.” he lifted her up and set her on the counter.

Y/N’s hands gripped his shoulders and pulled him even closer. “You’re so fucking gorgeous, it makes me so mad.”

“Tell me about it. Just my luck, the prettiest girl I’ve ever seen is also the bane of my existence.” he squeezed the back of her neck.

“Good thing we found something to help us release our anger.” she bit his lip so hard that it drew blood.

“Asshole.” he cursed. Then, an idea passed through his mind and a grin appeared. Before Y/N could address the weird reaction, Ethan attacked her neck making her squirm.

“Ethan, what the fuck!”

“Have fun explaining that to your father, sweetheart.” he smiled devilishly. Stepping back, after giving her one more short kiss, he opened the bathroom door. “See you tomorrow.”

“This changes nothing, prank war is still on.” she said with a glare.

How he loved when she got all angry with him. “Wouldn’t have it any other way. But it does change things, we can still have our little rivalry, hate each other, but I’m the only one who gets to kiss those pretty lips, understood?”

“I don’t know.” she scrunched her nose and gave him teasing eyes. “I’m kinda curious to know how James kisses.”

“You can try, but we both know you’ll came back to me.”

Y/N was sure that was true, but she wasn’t going to admit that. “Oh, yeah? Why so confident?”

“Because our chemistry is unmatched. And because I know that if you truly wanted to know how James kisses, you would’ve already made a move. You always go for what you want.”

The fact that he knew her so well made Y/N’s heart go crazy. “Meet me tomorrow at the fence after 8pm?”

Ethan shook his head, and Y/N hid her disappointment. But then, he went and made her cheeks flush when he said, “That’s seems like eternity, need to see you earlier than that. Before breakfast? At the fence.”

Y/N tried not to smile. “Okay.”

Ethan couldn’t help himself, and walked towards her again to kiss her once more. Just one kiss and they were both turned into fools. “You look beautiful tonight, by the way.”

The thing that started between them was like a sin. Their parents would never approve, but that’s what made it so passionate and exciting.

#ethan landry #ethan landry fluff #ethan landry fic #ethan landry x reader #ethan landry x y/n #ethan landry scream #ethan landry x you #ethan landry oneshot #ethan landry imagine #ethan landry smut #ethan landry fanfiction #jack champion x reader #jack champion x y/n #jack champion oneshot #jack champion imagine #jack champion fluff #jack champion #jack champion fanfic

266 notes · View notes

scarletwinterxx · 18 days

Text

wait for your love - haechan scenario

hellloooo so this one is a request. I've mentioned it before, i'm still not the best at writing angst but I try😅 when i saw this request, a few scenes immediately popped in my head. Hope you like it🥺 also I was listening to We Can't Be Friends by Ariana on repeat while writing this.

Also a short anecdote, when I saw nct dream last year during Sorry, Heart stage I literally bawled my eyes out. Like full on ugly sobbing in my seat haha I was okay during the first verse but when it got to Haechan's turn to sing the chorus the tears just went falling like waterfalls

ANYWAYSSSSSS

For my other works you can check them out here, and for my other story series’ you can check them out here.

and if you want, u can buy me coffee(totally optional but any donation is very much appreciated!) thank you🥺💛

All works are copyrighted ©scarletwinterxx 2024 . Do not repost, re-write without the permission of author.

(gif not mine, credits to rightful owner)

"What are we then?"

Those words shouldn't scare Haechan as much as it does. He hates it too. He hates how he can't say it to you but he doesn't want to let you go either.

He hates this grey area the two of you are in now.

"We're us. Isn't that enought?" he asks back

"For fuck's sake, we've been seeing each other for what? like 2 years now? And until now you still can't commit? I can't call you my boyfriend, you don't like it when people ask if we're dating"

"Because it's none of their fucking business"

"Well it's my business, I'm asking you right now, what the hell am I to you?" you stare at him, waiting for an answer. Any answer.

At this point hearing him say you don't mean anything to him would make more sense than the usual silence he'd give you.

"Baby, please I don't want to argue" he mumbles

"See, this is what you do all the time. I'm not a play toy. I'm not some past time you can call whenever you're bored, Haechan. We're adults now. I've invested my time, my feelings, a fraction of my life to you. For this. And you can't even answer me, is that too much to ask? Am I too much?"

You look at him, waiting for him to argue back. You didn't know it was this draining to be in a relationship or situationship or whatever it is you have with him. At some point you got tired of asking him what this all means. When it's clear he's not going to answer you, you stood up from your seat

"I can't do this" you whispered

"What?"

"I can't. I can't do what you're asking, Haechan" you speak clearer this time

He waits a few moments, letting the words sink in.

"What do you mean? I thought you said... you said we can"

With every word he tries not to show he's breaking right and the only thing keeping him together is you, and here you are about to slip through his fingers.

"We can't keep all promises, right? Like how you promised you'll try. This isn't trying."

"Baby-" "Don't" you cut him off. You know it will be a lot harder to walk away if you hear him call you that, it's already hard on you now.

"This is me letting you go" were your last words to him before walking away. You wipe the few tears that escaped, plastering a very fake smile before taking the first step away.

One of many you'd try to take just to get away from this heartbreak.

You would want to say that's not how it ended, that he changed his mind and finally mustered the courage to call you and say what he's really thinking. You want to say that he came the next day and surprised you, knocking on your door holding sunflowers for you.

But no.

After that day you never heard from him again. When you got the (unspoken) message that he'll never try to reach out and fix things between the two of you, you blocked him on everything. Your friends didn't ask questions, you went on with your life. Trying your best to bury and let that part of your story go.

From spending every day and most nights together to being strangers. You acted like he never existed to cover up the hurt you're feeling.

It's been over a year since that. You haven't really cried about it. Not even the day after he left. It's like you're just a shell now. You locked everything in a pandora box in your head, to be forgotten for the rest of time.

"Hey did you hear Dreamers new song?" your roommate asks the moment she steps through the door. You were sitting on the dinning chair, stacks of works and your laptop infront of you

She hears the song playing in the background, "Of course you have, it's good right?" she smiles

"Mhm, I like it"

"Sorry, Heart. Definitely an anthem for the broken hearted" she says withouth meaning out, "I meant like you know it's a sad song" she adds

You chuckle, she probably thinks this song is very fitting for you and you kinda agree with her.

"Anyways, I'm going to the lounge later. Want to come with?"

"Sounds good, I actually need to go out, stretch my legs and get some fresh air"

"Okay, let's leave after lunch"

You met with other friends at the lounge, chatting and sharing notes together. It was a good way to pass time. These days you find that it's best to keep yourself occupied so as not to think about things you'd rather not think about. You kept yourself busy. Finding random hobbies, fixation. For a while you liked running after class, then you got into baking, then crocheting. Activities that keeps you busy, distracted long enough not to remember.

One day you were at a record store, your newest hobby. Browsing for a new record to take home. Today out of the days you forgot to bring your headphones so you hum along the music playing in the store.

While reading the back of the record you were holding, you hear it.

A familiar voice you haven't heard in a long time, a voice you didn't think you'd hear again.

Your head shoots up, looking at the other side of the aisle.

You'd know his voice anywhere. You can be inside the loudest room and you'd still be able to single out his voice.

There he stands right across you, signing out your favorite bands newest song while he has his headphones on. Probably not realizing he's singing a bit too loud.

When Haechan felt someone staring at him, he looks up not expecting you to be looking back at him. He blinks a few times, comtemplating if this was all a dream or he's going crazy and started to hallucinate.

Immediately you put back the record you were holding and ran out the store. Once again leaving Haechan behind.

You're already far by the time he takes the steps to follow you, thinking this time he's not going to make the same mistake but you were already gone.

He knows you blocked him. Of course he tried to call you but his efforts were shut down when he couldn't reach you or his messages won't deliver.

Similar to you, he tried to find distractions. To drown out the thoughts, he drinks, goes out to parties, too many nights he drunk texted you, saying how much he missed you only to see it in the morning unsent. Most of the time there's music directly blasting through his ears. Music being his only escape from his own thoughts, if he's left long enough it's like his own mind is beating him up.

That's how he got into collecting records. He was on the look out for this new record so he decided to drop by the store that day. He didn't expect to see you there.

Out of all the places he'd see you again.

He's not going to lie, he imagined this moment many times before. Even rehearsed what he'd say to you when he see you again but now that it happened he just froze on the spot.

Just like that it's like he back in his room, watching you walk out his door for the last time. He's back to square one.

It's been weeks and no sign of Haechan. It's a good thing, you think.

Also you've been subtly avoiding going to public places just in case you accidently see him again. You thought you're ready, but the moment you saw him it's like all of these emotions you've repressed since you left came back again.

Your roommate finally convinced you to come out. A few of you were gathering for karaoke night. You almost said no again but you need a night out, one more night in your room might just drive you crazy.

"Oh my gosh, girlie you're hereeeee" one of your friends squeals when she saw you walk in the room

"I'm here as a spectator, not to sing" you tell her, accepting the bottle of beer she hands you

"Alright by me, you better cheer the loudest when I sing"

You got invited to karaoke night. A couple of students from campus got together tonight to hang out for chill night. Even though you don't really sing, you do enjoy hanging out with your friends.

You were talking to another friend when suddenly you hear the intro to a familiar song being sung by a familiar voice.

왜 이리도 쉽게 토라지는지? (Why do I become mad so easily) 내 맘이 작아서 너무 한심하지? (It's pathetic that my heart is so small right?)

You look over the makeshift stage to see Haechan holding the mic, singing out one of your favorite songs.

어떻게 널 볼까? (How can I see you?) 밤새 뒤척인 맘의 조각들 반짝이지 않아 (I toss and torn all night The fragments of my heart don't shine) 난 알고 있는데 내가 할 수 있는 건 (I know it, what I can do is) "I'm sorry", 그 말뿐이란 걸 (Only those words)

Before the chorus starts, Haechan looks through the crowd finding you. He looks straight at you as if he's singing every word to you.

Words you wished you heard from him a long time ago.

Tell me why I let you down Any chance I get, I'm breaking down 잘못인 걸 다 아는데 (아는데), 왜 힘든 걸까? (I know I'm at fault but why is it tiring?) To tell you that I'm sorry, heart

For the rest of the song the two of you look at each other. You listen to him, imagining it was really him who was saying those words and not through the song.

When he finished, you stood up to go outside and get some fresh air.

Of course he's here. Luck was never on your side and fate seems to like playing jokes on you.

Haechan watches your back, giving the mic to the next person before following you out. You hear the footsteps behind you, knowing who it might be without looking back.

You're now at the rooftop of the building, a fewer people were hanging out here than inside. Feeling another presence beside you but they haven't said anything yet.

Even though you already know who it was, you don't say anything instead you get another beer from a nearby cooler and passing it over to Haechan without a word.

For a while neither of you said anything, watching the view in front of you.

“I get flashbacks when I see you and not the good kind” you finally speak out loud

“You’re saying that like I was the worst thing that ever happened to you” he snickers, holding the bottle up to his lips to drink his beer

He really didn’t think you’d talk to him or even acknowledge his existence at all. But now here you are, at some rooftop at a party he least expected to see you.

He’s trying not to be too obvious but he can’t keep his eyes off of you. Maybe it was the way the light hit your face, or how the cold breeze was hitting his skin and yours. The moment he arrived he was kind of hoping to find you here tonight. He knew some of your friends were coming, you did use to have the same circle of friends until he started to distance himself.

He's glad though knowing you found good people who'll be there for you.

He's looking at you again, not being able to stop himself. It was at this moment he realized. Realized something he never thought he was ever capable of ever doing again.

Feeling. Loving. Falling and accepting.

The sound of horns from cars and the murmuring people in the background, the city lights in front the two of you and the stars as the witnesses. Witness for something that’s about to unfold.

It was scary. This new found knowledge scared him.

In the past it was scary to him to even think about being tied down. To be committed to someone. All of this comes from his fear of failing. He wanted to tell you that before, the last day before you ended things between the two of you he wanted to let you know the reason why he couldn’t set things straight with you was because he was scared of letting you down. He was scared you might feel trapped.

It's wasn't you who was too much for him. He was the one who felt like he was too much for you. He thought he was being too fast, too careless. His fears got the better of him, costing him a future with you.

You walked away and everything in his life got worse. Like the only light in his life was extinguished.

Right now feels like that one chance to get things right. Even though he still feels scared, this time he’s willing to take that risk for you.

There are other things to be scared of, like your gaze. It was the way you were looking at him.

Like you can just consume all of him with those eyes. How you’re saying a thousand words with them without saying a single syllable.

One look into his own eyes and he's ready to surrender everything to you.

“Do you really want to hear my answer to that or are you still emotionally unavailable?” you ask, taking a sip of your own drink.

“At what point did you realize you liked me? Like really liked me?” he asked instead, all he got was a laugh from you. You were laughing out loud like it was the funniest joke you’ve ever heard.

“We were watching a movie, I mumbled something under my breath. I think it was something along the lines of ‘oh that’s so cute’, talking to myself. Then I felt you hold my hand, you kissed it before holding it in yours for the rest of the movie. It’s not the grandest gesture but at that moment I felt so content. It was all I wanted but I knew you didn’t think the same way” you smile sadly recalling that memory. Giving him an answer, wondering why you did.

"I guess I never said sorry, I'm sorry"

You shrug, taking another swig from your drink. "What's done is done. I would say no hard feelings but I kinda do hate you for what you did"

"Good. I'd be sadder if you said you didn't care. Hate isn't the opposite of love, it's indifference" he says

"Was that what you felt for me before? Indifference?" you can't help but ask, in your mind you're not sure if you're ready to hear his answer but it's too late to take it back

He shakes his head, drinking the rest of his drink before standing straight to face you

"I felt more for you, more than I ever said. In that I was wrong, I admit. I should've told you. It might be no use in telling you now, but I did feel something for you. I was being stupid and was too scared to admit it"

"Then why are you telling me now?"

"Because I realized not having you in my life is scarier than the thoughts in my head. I was too scared of my own mind, I sacrificed you instead when I shouldn't have. I could've told you. I wish I told you"

You listen to him, letting it sink in. For so long you asked just what went wrong, what you could've done differently or what would've happened if you stayed.

"I waited, I waited until you told me you liked me. But the more I waited, the more I started to not like myself. I knew I deserved more but I stayed because I wanted to be with you. You were always first to me" you say

Hearing you say those words breaks something in him. He did like you, he still likes you. Haechan has always kept a safe distance from everyone, you were the only exception.

"I'm glad we got to talk" you say to him with a smile, then you walk back inside.

This time Haechan didn't follow you because he knows this won't be the last time he sees you.

"Oh my gosh, so that's what happened between the two of you?"

After that conversation with Haechan, you went back to your place and called it a night. The next day your roommate noticed you were staring blankly into space, out of concern she asked you what's wrong. You told her all that happened in the past 24 hours then you told her all about your history with Haechan.

"Yep, I haven't seen him around campus that much after that"

"You know, one of his friends is my blockmate and we go to the same gym. I heard he did an exchange program for a year, maybe that's why you haven't seen him around" she tells you

"Oh really, he did mention it before. Maybe he went through with it" you mumbled

"So you guys were like in a situationship then?"

"I guess so. We weren't exclusive, but he was the only guy I was seeing for like 2 years. Remember when I was barely home"

"Oh! That was him? He used to like send food here all the time whenever you were busy studying"

"What?"

"Oh my god I forgot to tell you that? yea this was like when you guys were a thing. During exam season or when you're busy with reports and stuff, he'd drop off food for you" she tells you

"I thought you had those delivered"

"Girl no, half of the time he leaves it at our door. The only reason I know is because I caught him one time and he fessed up"

No, you definitely didn't know that.

Haechan never told you. He never told you anything. At some point you thought it was better to not ask instead of being met with silence as a reply.

One thing you know though is he's the type to take action rather than say it. You won't be surprised if he did it before, he might not be good at expressing himself but he never passed the chance to make you feel like you're the only girl in his world.

It feels like that was another lifetime ago, that at some point in your life you'd rather be the backburner than totally lose him.

Seeing him again was no help. It's like you spiraled down again. You thought he didn't have this effect on you anymore but you were wrong. You'd be lying if you say you haven't thought of him since you saw him last.

What you didn't know was Haechan felt exactly the same. He's trying to think of a way to reach out to you without seeming to needy, he didn't want you to think he's forcing himself back into your life.

Another week has passed and still no sign of you. He decided to get drinks with his friends, he's a few drinks in when he decided to call it an early night. This really wasn't where he wanted to be.

He's not sure where he wants to be. All he knows is his night would be a thousand times better if he sees you, even just a glimpse.

On his walk back to his place, he plucked a branch from a random plant. Picking out the leaves one by one, leaving a trail behind him.

You're on your way back from the library, deciding to get some midnight snacks first. You noticed the scattered leaves on the road, chuckling at the sight. The more steps you take, you slowly realized it's the same path to your apartment.

You slowed down, looking around to check if anybody was close to you but the street is empty. You grab your phone in your pocket just in case, while you hold your keys with the other hand.

When you're nearing your front door, you see someone sitting at the steps. Head lying low, you can't even see his face but you'd know that brown mop of hair anywhere.

"Haechan?" you called out for him

Haechan looks up, seeing you walking towards him. At first he thinks he's dreaming, he wipes his eyes to clear his vision. Even pinched his arm to check if this was real.

You're here.

He's here.

"What are you doing here?" you asked once you're standing right in front of him

"I grabbed drinks with Yangyang and Jeno, I swear I was walking home. I guess I got confused" he mumbles, now holding a branch with no leaves on it.

You look at it, then looked back at the trail of leaves behind you.

"Do you want to come in? Go drink some water or coffee first before you head back" you offered

"Are you sure?" he asks back, standing up from the steps

"Wouldn't offer if I wasn't. Let's go inside, it's getting chilly"

He steps aside to let you go first, following behind you. The elevator ride up to your floor was quiet, even after going in your apartment Haechan didn't say a word.

"Here, have some water. I can make coffee but it's too late to drink it, do you want ramen or something?" you ask him while getting the snacks you got out of the grocery bag

"Do you usually ask guys to come in with you and cook ramen for them?" he asks

He meant to only think of it, but with the little amount of alcohol in his system seems to have turn the filter off.

You snicker at his question. Instead of answering him, you grab two ramen cup noodles from your cupboard and turn the kettle on. You wait for the red light to turn green before pouring it in the cups, bringing it over the kitchen island and taking the seat beside him.

"I can't even order late night snacks without thinking about you, we used to do it all the time when I came over at yours or when we're having late night hangouts. You ruined a lot of things for me" you finally say

Haechan just looks at your profile. Even though you say it like that, there's really no trace of anger on your face. Maybe you are, but to him you look so pretty and cozy. He wanted to beat himself up for ever thinking he can walk away from this. From you.

"For what it's worth, whenever I get drunk I used to text you all the time. You probably blocked me because the messages never got delivered. Every morning I see that on my phone, message after message until I lost count. I knew you weren't going to answer but I still did it"

"Why?" you ask him

"I missed you. I wanted to tell you I was being stupid, I wanted to beg for you to take me back. But all of those thing I could only say with a bit of help from alcohol. That's how I knew I couldn't go back, not yet anyways. You deserved more than drunken confessions"

You look over at him, for the first time since that night you really look at him. The same eyes that used to feel like home to you.

He looked so different yet the same.

You still feel the same.

"It's been 3 minutes, you hate soggy noodles" you nod at his ramen. Opening your own cup to start eating. Neither of you said anything after that. It wasn't awkward, you actually enjoyed the quiet.

For the first time since Haechan came back and you saw him again, your mind was at peace. You weren't overthinking things. You weren't wondering your long list of what if's.

It's like a part of you knew he's finally here again.

After the quick snack session, he helped you clean up before walking towards the door.

"Thank you for the uh snacks and water" he didn't know what to say, a shy Haechan is a rare sight so you can't help but smile.

Haechan sees this, he can feel his own cheeks redden. You still look so beautiful when you smile, so beautiful that he's ready to fight anyone who makes you smile that isn't him.

"Go home, it's late. You're sober now right?" you ask him

"Yea, I'm good"

"Okay, don't want you getting confused and going to someone else's front door"

"I promise I won't drunk text you again so will you unblock me now? Or if you have a new number you can text me or whatever. Actually you know what, do whatever makes you feel comfortable. Don't listen to me, I'm just blabbing now"

You can't help but giggle at him, the action making Haechan's heart skip a few beats.

"I'm imagining this is how those drunk texts would sound like" you say

"I missed you, Y/N" he mumbles

You don't say anything. He can hear his own heartbeating, each thump like it's the last then you're smiling back at him

"Goodnight, Haechan"

He smiles at you, waving goodbye before finally walking out. He gestures for you to close the door behind him, only leaving after he hears the lock from the other side. He skips back home.

The next few days were back to normal, you weren't feeling gloomy. You were going out with friends. All in all, you're in a great mood.

"Hey, somebody left this outside. Tell me I'm crazy but is this from Haechan?" your roommate hands you over a small bouquet of flowers with a paper bag full of snacks.

"Uh yeah, I think so"

"I know things didn't end well between the two of you, but the boy is still so whipped for you" she mumbles, watching the small smile on your face

"Maybe it's just a peace offering"

"Right, well whatever it might be I say go for it. As long as you're happy"

You look up at her, shocked to hear that all of a sudden "Isn't that what you're worrying about? You really think I didn't notice it, you were listening to Sorry, Heart on repeat the other day then now you're listening to love songs. If he's it for you, then give it a chance"

She left after that, leaving you alone at home.

You take the gifts Haechan sent to your room, putting the flowers in a vase. You see a small note attached,

xx12131xxx just in case you lost it or changed your number. - H

You get your phone and dial the number, it's still in your phone. You unblock it first before you click call, waiting a few rings before you hear his voice

"Y/N?"

"How did you know it was me?"

"I wasn't expecting anyone else, and uh it looks like you didn't change your number"

"Oh yea uhm so you're unblocked now" you told him, not really sure what else to say

He chuckles, "Thanks, so I'm guessing you got the flowers and the snacks?"

"Yeah, thanks by the way. Why though?"

"You shared your stash with me the other night, just wanted to pay you back"

"You didn't have to, I offered. But thanks again"

"Hey uh are you busy right now? or tomorrow or really whenever you're free"

"I don't have anymore classes today"

"Do you want to go grab coffee or food or anything really. Whatever you want, my treat"

If someone told you you'd be going out to get drinks with Haechan, you'd say they're out of their mind. But here you are, visiting a new cafe you've never been to with a guy you thought you'd never be with again.

"I'd get the taro milktea, thanks"

"I'll take this one" he points at the drink in the picture, "And two of the cookies please, thank you" he pulls out his card to pay for the both of you. When you got your drinks and food, you walked back outside to sit on the vacant seats. The weather was nice, it wasn't too hot or too cold. A perfect day to be out.

You open your drink, taking a quick sip while Haechan does the same. You notice he made the face, like when he drinks or eats something sour.

"It's lemon flavored isn't it?" you chuckle, taking the drink from him and giving yours to him instead

"No, it's fine. I'll drink it"

"You hate anything sour flavored, I like lemon it's fine" you sip his drink, it does taste good but you know he won't like it

He watches you get the cookies, breaking it in half before giving him the other.

"If you have anything to say, just say it. You're too in your head again" you tell him

"Sorry, I was just..." he's at lost for words, but this time not for the wrong reason.

It's like his mind can't put what he's feeling in to words.

"Did you get the record you were looking for?" you ask him, changing the topic

"Huh?"

"At the record store"

"Oh I wasn't really buying anything, I was just browsing around. They didn't have the vinyl version of the album I wanted, I'll come back some other time" he tells you, taking a sip of your well now his drink.

"You were singing to the Dreamers, you know them?"

"I know a few songs, Sorry, Heart is good. I like that one"

"Me too. You sounded good when you sang it" you complimented him, this made him smile shyly at you

"Isn't it a bit too sad?" he asks, you shrug your shoulders

"I like it, although my roommate said I've been playing love songs these past few days" you shake your head, remembering what she told you

"Thank you by the way" Haechan suddenly says

"For what? You paid for our drinks"

"I meant for agreeing to get drinks with me. I was an asshole to you. All the time I was gone, I was thinking about how to make it up to you. That is if it's okay with you" he tells you.

He mentally pats himself on the back for not messing that up. Maybe slowly he'll learn how to speak his true feelings, he just hopes you'll be there to listen to him. Even though it took him this long.

"The last thing you asked me was what are we, I was being stupid. I wanted us to be more. I wanted us to be official but I was always scared to say it. I don't know why I was ever scared of committing, I could've been with you. That's my regret"

"Haechan"

"You're not a playtoy to me or just some past time whenever I'm bored. You were never too much for me. If anything I was the one who lacked. I don't blame you for walking away, I deserved that. I needed that so I could finally grow up"

You listen to him. You listen to him finally say the words you've been waiting to hear from him.

"This time I want to do it right, I want to take you out on dates, be there to go on night walks with you, go buy records we'd listen to, whatever you want to I just wan to do it with you. If you'll still have me"

The last words was barely a whisper, like he's scared to say it outloud, scared you might turn him away.

Haechan feels his heart beating wildly again, one day he might pass from arrest he thinks. Then you smile at him and it's like everything in his world stops.

You lean over, kissing the corner of his lip lightly. It was so quick but to him it felt like long time

"All I wanted was that, when it gets too much in your head you can talk to me. I'll listen. We don't have to walk away from each other" you tell him

"I'm sorry" he whispers

"I forgive you, the same way I forgive myself from everything that has happened. We need to heal from those wounds for us to move forward"

He smiles at you, he didn't even notice he got a bit teary eyed until a few tears escaped. He wipes it away before looking back at you again.

You stand up from your seat, holding out your hand to him. He looks at your hand then your face then your hand again before intertwining it with his.

There wasn't a destination in mind, he's probably thinking the same. The two of you just walk where your steps lead you to, with him following beside you holding you close to him.

Haechan looks at your hands, a smile forming on his face. He leans towards you to kiss you on the head, the action making you smile too.

"Thank you" you hear him mumble. You didn't say anything back but he felt you grip his hand tighter. Squeezing it three times.

And he knew everything was finally going to be okay. This time, you won't let go.

182 notes · View notes

sunny44 · 4 months

Text

Marriage (Part 8)

Pairing: Max Verstappen x ex fiancée!reader Mason Mount x Fiancée!reader

Warnings: fights and that’s it

Summary: Max leaves his fiancée y/n at the altar on their wedding day but after years of regretting what he did, by a miracle of fate (or Lando) she appears in his life again.

Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

I didn't have the courage to take the test.

It had been two days since the event, and I sat on the bed, staring at a pregnancy test kit, trying to gather the courage to use it.

Mason was at training, and despite being invited by Red Bull and wanting to avoid Max, Mason's media team insisted that attending the Monaco GP would be good for his image.

That was the reason for our trip.

I used the opportunity when I needed to pee and took the test. Once done, I put it back in the box and tossed it into my bedside table.

I spent the day working to distract myself. I only realized it was evening when I felt a kiss on my forehead.

"Been here all day?" he asked.

"Yeah, had a lot of work," I replied.

"Have you eaten?"

"I only noticed the time because you arrived," I said. He chuckled and kissed my forehead again.

"Well, then I'll get something for us to eat, and you stay right there."

I continued working until he left, only stopping when he returned and we had dinner.

After we finished, we went to the bedroom. I took a shower while he got ready to sleep.

"Love, can I borrow your charger? Can't find mine." he asked.

"Sure, it's in my bedside table, first drawer." I shouted back.

After drying my hair, doing my skincare and getting dressed, I went to the room. Mason was sitting on the bed with a paper in hand and a displeased expression.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

"Mind explaining what this is?" He stood up and practically threw the paper at me.

It was the letter.

I took a deep breath, realizing Mason had found the letter. The atmosphere in the room shifted, filled with unspoken tension.

"Mason, I..." I began, but he interrupted.

"Just explain what the hell this is." he insisted, eyes fixed on the letter.

I walked over, took the paper, and glanced at the content. I hadn't read it since he handed it to me. It probably contained words and apologies Max wanted me to know, and my heart raced.

"It's a letter." I stated the obvious, trying to buy time to gather my thoughts.

"I can see that." he replied with a touch of frustration. "But it's a letter apologizing and also a letter saying he still loves you."

Taking another deep breath, I decided to be honest.

"Max wrote this letter to me some time ago."

"How long ago?"

"Do you remember when I told you I became friends with Lando?" He nodded. "We hung out that time because he insisted on introducing me to his best friends that ended up being Max and Daniel."

"What does that have to do with the letter?" He asked, frustrated.

"After the party that he introduced us he talked to Lando about what happened. He made him help him meet me to apologize. So, he said he wrote this letter and handed it to me, but I didn't have the courage to open it."

"And why did you keep it?"

"I don't know. I thought maybe one day I'd have the courage to read it and that’s why I kept it. Perhaps I felt I needed a reminder of how things were before."

His expression changed from frustration to anger.

"You kept a letter from your ex in our house? Are you serious?"

"I was unsure what to do with it and couldn't bring myself to throw it away, so I kept it. It's a piece of the past I kept hidden."

"Why hide it, then? Why keep secrets from me?" Mason's frustration grew. "You lied again about this. Not long ago, you argued with me for defending you and then you do this, keeping his things."

"I thought I could handle it on my own. I didn't want to burden you with my past." I explained.

He sighed, clearly upset.

"Y/n, we promised transparency. Keeping something like this from me... hurts."

"I'm sorry, Mason. I should have told you about this and I know this now." I admitted, feeling a pang of guilt.

"But it's always going to be like this, isn't it? You lie to me about him, and it makes me think you still love him even after he left you at the altar like an idiot," he said angrily. "You were supposed to tell me about him years ago and then when I found out on the internet I’ve try to be cool with it because I saw how much it hurts you, even if I was angry that you e lied to me. And now this, im your fiancé and u was supposed to be the one you trust to tell me this things but apparently lying to me it’s easier for you.

“I’m sorry.”

“I honestly don't know if I can still do this."

"What does that mean?"

"I don't know if I can marry you." I felt tears fill my eyes. "I don't know if I can marry someone who lies to me."

"Mason, I..."

"I need some time." He left the room, leaving me there alone.

Bonus scene!

Yourusername Instagram stories

“So much work that I’m starting to get crazy”

Taglist: @ironmaiden1313 @dudenhaaa27 @christianpulisic10 @gaslysainz @fanboyluvr @urgirlceci @justdreamersdream @aundercoverosh @newlifeforus @depressedriches @topguncultleader @luvrrish @tyna-19 @esposadomd @formulas-bitch

152 notes · View notes

lovelyspooks · 1 year

Text

Selfish

Peter Parker x gender neutral reader

Warnings - angst

Summary - Reader worries, a lot. But that's totally normal considering their boyfriend is Spider-Man right?

Word count- 909

**********************************************

"Why can't you see my point of view Peter!?" you've been arguing for what seems like hours over Peter's recklessness as Spider-Man.

"I'm trying to understand you baby but you're not understanding me" Peter has been calm the whole argument, too calm, he doesn't understand how much it hurts you when he shows up to your window covered in wounds almost every night, he doesn't understand how worried you are all the time.

He's staring right at you, obviously wanting you to drop the subject but his defiance makes you more angry.

"Why can't you just listen to me!?"

"because not everything is about fucking you! God can't you just shut up for once?" his words cute deep as you cower down but Peter doesn't notice and continues

"I'm under constant pressure and I expect to come home to relax but you and your constant nagging are always breathing down my neck! It's fucking annoying! You're annoying! " Peter let out a huff but as soon as he saw your glassy eyes and timid body posture he regretted what he said immediately.

You looked down as your mind raced a thousand miles per hour.

Had he always felt like this?

"fine. I'm sorry... I didn't know you felt that way" you feel your face heat up as you bite back tears.

you'd always been insecure about being annoying and Peter knew that, he spent months breaking down the wall you built up to spare yourself from the embarrassment of being a burden, but here he was, helping you build that wall back up.

Peter goes to open his mouth but struggles to find words.

"bug I-... I'm so sorry, I don't mean any of that, I shouldn't have said it" he walks over to you and grabs your shoulders, his heart breaks as you avoid eyes contact with him.

"it's okay" your voice is strained as you talk, avoiding eye contact as you bring your arms up to hug yourself .

"no, it's not okay, you just want me to be safe and I'm too in my own head to see how it makes you feel" Peter brings a hand to your chin to try and make you look up at him but you shrug him off.

"I said it's fine Pete, I'm tired, I'm going to bed" You sniffle as you make your way to you and Peters bedroom to get ready.

Peter tries to think on what to do but nothing comes to mind as he silently watch you walk away "o-okay" was all he could choke out.

****

You walk into your room and shut the door behind you, embarrassed and hurt hoping Peter wouldn't walk in after you.

You change and get into bed, you lay on your side making sure you won't be facing Peter when he eventually comes to bed too.

You quietly sniffle as tears stream out of your eyes. You knew you'd fuck it up. You knew you and your annoying nagging would ruin your relationship but you let Peter and his stupid reassurance talk it out of you.

Your sniffing comes to an abrupt stop as you hear your bedroom door slowly open.

You don't say anything, instead closing your eyes and pretending to sleep. You hope Peter will go away so he doesn't have to see your puffy eyes but that's thrown out the window as the bed dips and a nervous hand snakes around your waist. When you don't protest he scoots closer and buries his head in your neck.

"I'm sorry" Peter's shaky voice is muffled out by your neck but you understand it clear.

"it doesn't matter Peter" you lowkey wanted him to drop the subject but your need for constant reassurance screamed at you to hear his apology out.

"it does though, I was an asshole for shouting at you, you didn't deserve that. I didn't want to see your point of view but I do now." Peter lifts his head to look at your face and another wave of guilt hits him like a bus to see your puffy eyes and tear stained cheeks.

"if you want to talk..." He places his fingerings on your cheek and slowly wipes away your remaining tears "I'll listen. I promise" A gentle kiss is placed on your cheek before Peter puts his head back in your neck, waiting for you to speak.

You huff before turning to face Peter. Nerves coursed through you. Should I be honest?

You bite your lip weighing out your options, you're about to turn back around until Peter places his hand on your cheek.

You sigh into his touch as you start to speak.

"I'm just so scared all the time Pete" your lip trembles.

"I know, I know, I'm sorry " Peter coos as he bring you in closer, your head now on his chest.

You inhale Peters scent as if it's the last time you'll ever have the chance to.

"I know you're constantly stressed out, I'm being a baby" You bite your lip, begging yourself not to cry in front of Peter

"hey" Peter pushes you away from him gently and grabs your chin, forcing you to look at him "you're not being a baby"

You nod before pushing yourself back into Peter's chest.

"I'll be more careful. I promise." His hand lands on your back, gentle strokes soothing you, lulling you to sleep.

"I know" You let sleep consume you.

#peter parker x reader #peter parker x you #andrew!peter x reader #peter parker angst #peter parker oneshot #spooky’s work~

478 notes · View notes

judasgot-it · 1 year

Note

Ello o/, I really like your writing style. May i req the reader pretends to be a client but actually a member of the agency but the ADA doesn't remember the reader because they have an ability to make anyone/everyone forget they exist and used it to protect the agency also dazai is the only one who remembers them.

I'm so sorry I took so long to get to this request I've been busy with life and all of that lame stuff

Also, I hope you don't mind but I changed it a Lil to be a two-parter with Ranpo as well, I feel like he would figure it out pretty quickly

Scenario: reader visits the ADA pretending to be a client. Dazai is the only one who remembers them working for the agency. (Dazai, Ranpo)

Part 1; Dazai

"So what brings someone as lovely as you to the agency today?"

Dazai was standing in front of you, giving you his best smile. He was holding your hand and reciting his lines as if you were in a play - although between the two of you, he looked like he was giving a performance for the ages.

"Dazai, you can't flirt with everyone that comes into the agency. You know this."

Kunikida had walked over from his desk, making sure to check up on your conversation. He just wanted to ensure you actually got the help that you needed and weren't swept away by Dazai's antics.

A part of you missed this.

"Oh, we're fine Kunikida. In fact, Dazai was just going to lead me to your consultation room so he could help me with my case."

You were covering for Dazai. Old habits die hard you suppose.

"You know, you shouldn't stress out so much Kunikida, you'll get grey hairs. Actually? I think you have some already!"

Dazai took this as his chance to poke around Kunikida's head, 'showing' him his gray hairs. You had to put a hand over your mouth to stop your laughter as you watched the two of them argue.

"I'll be in the room waiting on you Dazai. I don't have all day, you know?"

You walked out of the room, leading yourself through the building. Nothing really changed since you'd been there, although you could spot a couple of new faces among those working at their desks.

It was nice to see the agency moving on and continuing to grow.

The room was a bit different as well. They had finally replaced the old chairs that had been torn in a fight.

They were now a softer, blue fabric. The room seemed more softer, especially for what the room always brought with it.

"So, you finally decided to come back?"

Dazai appeared behind you, closing the door to the room - giving the two of you some much-needed privacy.

The curtain had closed on your little play.

"Well, only to visit. I'm leaving Yokohama tomorrow so I thought I'd stop by beforehand and see how you were all doing."

You looked behind you to see Dazai smiling. Although, you could clearly tell it wasn't a happy one.

"Let's sit down, I feel like you're going to want to know a bit about where I've been. I'll tell you if you promise to keep it a secret, ok?"

You had already moved to sit down on the small office chairs in the room - they were cozy enough for what would essentially be an interrogation.

Dazai wanted answers from you. Knowing him, he was going to get them one way or another - no matter how nice he was about it.

It was hard to stay silent anyway. He was the only man who really knew your predicament. You had hunches about everyone else, but it wasn't like they could escape your ability.

Even if they had this feeling about you, they couldn't escape the gap in their memories. No matter what, you were just a blindspot to them. The moment they met you, they would forget about you once again.

"You want to know why I left the agency, right?"

The most you left behind was a vague sense of unease. Not knowing why you had a sense of dejavue over a certain book and wondering why you know so much about something.

It was a great ability to have for a vagabond.

Dazai shook his head, placing it between it on his folded hands.

"You caught me there. I know how you did it, but I don't know if I can really figure out your why."

You looked to the window.

"Why did you leave when you were happy? Is it some form of punishment? It's got me really curious."

The view was perfect. Nothing would come and distract you from having to respond to the question.

He caught you, like a bird in flight.

"Because I don't have a choice. The longer I stay anywhere, the more dangerous I become. Right now I am just a ghost - I'm sure the president knows I exist, but can never really put a thumb on it."

You tried to wiggle around in your seat, looking as if you were in complete control.

"But if I stayed, eventually the feeling of being forgotten would wear off. It's painful being ignored, but when it happens all the time I can never feel the pain - I'm numb. But the agency?"

You let a watery smile out. Being in the room, finally talking to someone that wasn't a stranger. Talking to Dazai, who actually remembered you no matter how many times you activated your ability.

It was refreshing.

The walls that you had built up were breaking down.

"We got close. But eventually, I saw that their memory would get spotty, and it was happening again. I can't stand to see the people I love to forget about me, I don't want to become a stranger to them."

You hid your eyes behind your hands, trying to shield them from the sun. That's why they were dripping tears. Telling yourself this helped stave them off.

"So you left before that could happen, right?"

You felt an arm wrap around you, pulling you close.

Dazai's jacket wasn't exactly the softest, but you stayed close as you tried to push back your tears. You knew this visit would be hard, that you would have a hard conversation - but you didn't want to break down.

You tried to mumble out some sort of excuse or apology but your words were failing you.

Which left you with nothing but silence.

"Dazai. Thank you for not forgetting about me."

You took the lapels of his jacket in your hands, pulling him closer. You hadn't hugged someone who wasn't a stranger in so long. This was a feeling you definitely missed since your departure from the ADA.

"Y/n."

Dazai pulled away, bending down so the two of you were face to face. He cupped your face with his surprisingly calloused hands, analyzing you with his soft brown eyes.

He let out a breath, in some emotion that you couldn't really place.

"Anytime."

He backed away, wiping away his serious demeanor with a Cheshire smile.

"Besides. It's not like I have a choice in it. You know, you leave quite the impression on people!"

There was something behind those words. You felt it. The way he missed you, how it was unsaid in the air but was shown in the way he kept eyeing you.

He still kept his hands on you, as if the moment he let go, you would once again fade into a burning memory that only he was cursed to hold. Like so many other moments in his life.

A part of you wanted to stay, just for him. The feeling of his hand on your shoulder as he led you throughout the building, keeping you around so you could talk to the members one last time.

But your mind was unfortunately set.

He was nice enough to introduce you to the new members who had joined in your absence - it was a smart ploy.

He was trying to bide time, keeping an arm wrapped tightly around you while he joked around with Atsuhi about some memories they had a while back.

You could see how he tried to make you seem as if you never had left. As if you were always here.

It was a really smart ploy. It almost made you want to cancel your ability just so you could see everyone understand the inside joke that Dazai had said. One that only now you two understood.

If he was quiet after you had gone, staring at the papers at his desk - well that was, unfortunately, a secret only he would know.

Part 2; Ranpo

You were set to depart Yokohama in less than an hour. In the meantime, you were meandering the train station, biding your time.

After having visited the ADA again, you felt a bit lost. You truly did want to stay - but you felt that the ramifications of that action would be worse than if you continued living as a vagabond.

Your ability altered people's memories to the point that they themself would forget about your existence one day - the curse of being able to run away at a drop of a hat.

You can always run, but seemingly never stay. Somehow, they would always forget about you. Either gradually or suddenly, you knew that it would happen.

Freedom was a blessing, but it always came at a high price.

"Is this line A? I don't really know the system around here well."

Ranpo had sat next to you, making you jump in shock.

He was looking at you, waiting for your answer. He didn't seem to recognize you - not from earlier in the day, and not from when you had worked together.

It was a blessing, you supposed.

You took a breath to calm down.

"Yeah, you have the right one. It's not coming for an hour or so though, so you have time."

You hoped he would walk away. Being near anyone from your past always made you hurt in some way or another.

He seemed stubborn though, drapping his shoulders across the back of the bench and spreading his legs out in front of him - like a starfish on a rock, leaving himself out to sunbathe.

"I think I know you from somewhere. Do I?"

That made you stop.

"What do you mean by that?"

"I just mean - have we met before? You seem familiar. I have a feeling I met you, kind of like..."

He put his hand in his pocket, unwrapping a lollipop.

"I can't put my finger on the word..."

He stuck it in mouth with a loud pop.

"Dejavu?"

You supplied it to him, hoping he would go away. A cold, sinking had settled into your gut.

"Yeah! That's right!"

He looked at you, smiling wide. You realized your mistake when you saw that he had his glasses on.

"That's your ability name, right, Y/n?"

This was when you realized how unsettlingly quiet this station was. The announcement on the intercom felt like it was ringing in your ears.

Ranpo was still staring at you, waiting for you to piece a sentence together.

"Do you remember me?"

The man shrugged, settling back down. He was comfortable enough to take up more of your space than you had realized - his legs brushing up against yours.

"No. But I know that I could - if you let me. The ADA is a detective agency, Y/n. You can't exactly run forever when you have us on your tail."

Ranpo didn't wait for you to comprehend what he was saying. He leaned in close, your noses brushing up against each other.

"You're going to keep coming back."

"So. What are you going to do then?"

He said it in a monotone voice, as a simple statement.

"And even you think we won't find you - I will. I'm the best detective. No mystery is beyond me, not even your ability."

He waved up some papers. They were notes, photos and documents.

He was tracking you.

Ranpo smiled.

"I could go for some coffee."

"I dunno. You want to stay. I'm pretty hungry right now."

He was waving the documents around in a small circle, still refusing to give you space.

It was subtle, but you weren't going to get away from him without a chase.

I'm leaving the ending super open-ended, but Ranpo catches everyone in his life in weird ways so I feel like he'd do it this way too cause if you can somehow escape him once you're on his mental list

#bsd x reader #bungo stray dogs x reader #dazai x reader #ranpo x reader

462 notes · View notes

hopelesslyromanticshark · 2 months

Note

hi so i read your travis stoll x daughter of poseidon hcs and i was for a similar one?

connor stoll x poc! daughter of poseidon hcs? you can choose the trope but maybe featuring overprotective brother percy?

if not that’s okay too, thank you if you decide to do it!

⋆⭒˚.⋆ connor stoll x poc! daughter of poseidon! reader hcs

content: connor stoll x poc! daughter of poseidon! reader hcs warning: language, silly goofy times, someone is shirtless author's note: this one scared me, to be totally real. again, i don't really know if it is my place as a white passing mixed person to speak on this topic, so i wasn't sure if i wanted to do it. but, I figured screw it, let's give it a shot. and then from the moment i started it, i started to have fun, so thank you!! (tho if any one feels that it was wrong that i wrote this or something, pls pls let me know and i'm more than willing to take it down!!)

bro stole your heart and then wants to claim he didn't???? like, give it back that was MINE-

you guys obvi fell in love on a quest

it was a mismatched group but chiron just needed to send people to go get one of aphrodite's many, many combs.

so it was just you and connor on your way to maine, where she accidently left it on the beach totally not after hanging out with ares.

you and connor knew of each other but weren't like...close

but then you guys were riding the subway out of new york and when it jerked, your grip on the pole slipped and you would have been sent barreling into other new yorkers had connor not caught your waist and pulled you into his chest.

blushing mess, the both of you

that was the start fr

then it was the little bed and breakfast in maine

they only had one tiny twin bed left

because of course they did

but you and connor were so exhausted from fighting your way to maine that it didn't even matter anymore

"i'll sleep on the floor, lemme just grab a pillow-"

"are you kidding me?? con, we just fought off a hydra for like thirty minutes. you can't keep doing this quest without back support. c'mon, promise i don't bite," you argue, instantly.

connor stared at you for a few seconds before his eyes flicked to the tiny bed and then back to you

"y/n-"

"i'm not gonna fight you on this. bed, now. unless you want to sleep in wet pajamas because i will bust a pipe if you sleep on the ground."

"okay, okay, calm down, aqua girl."

"that's ms. aqua girl to you!" you joke and connor laughs, shaking his head as he slipped into the bed, squeezing off to one side as best he could

you followed soon after, also trying to give him as much space as possible

there was some silence, just the quiet slow breathing from the both of them and the distant sounds of the waves of maine

"good night, y/n"

"night, connie."

the next morning, connor woke up before you did, feeling strangely warm and a heavy weight on his chest

he forced his eyes open and looked down, realizing your head was now resting on his chest, your tight curls sprayed over his sleep shirt

his arms were naturally draped over your waist and both of yours legs were tangled up with his

connor blushed, feeling like he was tangled up in the softest seaweed

he wanted to move away for your dignity but he caught one whiff of that distinct ocean smell in your hair and couldn't bring himself to pull away

which led to an awkward breakfast

both of you blushing idiots as you retrieved aphrodite's stupid comb, mentally cursing the damn thing out for causing all this trouble.

but then, ever the confident one, on the train ride back to camp, you kissed connor

he kissed back bc he's not an idiot

if a pretty girl kisses you, you kiss back

those da rulez

let's just say they were grateful for aphrodite's comb after that

also girly totally forgot it on purpose to get the two together, change my mind

ANYWAYS you had told connor that you could not tell percy under any circumstances

he was crazy protective of his baby sister

no guy even tried anymore bc percy would just kick their asses during train and pretend it was just to make them better

no it was to keep them away from his sister

he just didn't think any one was good enough for her

so, you and connor snuck around

which connor was perfect for, being a son of hermes and all

he had mastered the art of sneaking at a very early age

though, he got better as he did it with his pretty ocean girl

so, obvi, you guys were fooling around in the poseidon cabin

percy was supposed to be gone for at least another hour, helping someone with something that you didn't care to listen to

connor's shirt had been flung somewhere else and he was working dedicatedly on getting yours off

that was, naturally, when the door swung open and percy waltz into his cabin, stilling as he saw a shirtless, lip gloss covered, connor stoll on top of his sister

"...hey, percy, what's up, man?" connor started, trying to offer a bright smile

percy's eye twitched before he lunged forwards, connor scrambling out of the poseidon cabin, still without his shirt and his pants falling out slightly

"I'M GONNA GUT YOU!! GET BACK HERE!!" percy scream after him, pursuing the son of hermes

"I'M SORRY BUT SHE WAS JUST TOO CUTE!" connor called back with a laugh, darting behind a beefy son of ares and his daugther of apollo girlfriend

"YOURE DONE FOR STOLL!"

"what ever it is, i didn't do it!" travis replied, confused, but throwing his hands up

"not you," you told travis who nodded his head

"ahh, percy finally found out?"

"yes- wait, how'd you know?"

"please, don't be rude," travis taunted with a wide smile

"Y/N HELP HE'S TRYING TO DROWN ME!!"

"SHUT UP!! I'M NOT TRYING TO DROWN YOU, I AM GOING TO DROWN YOU!!"

"boys, boys, you're both pretty," y/n mused, laughing with travis

#postcards from covey ౨ৎ #all my love ౨ৎ #pjo #percy jackson #pjo fandom #percy jackon and the olympians #connor stoll x reader #heroes of olympus x reader #travis stoll

123 notes · View notes

the-desilittle-bird · 1 year

Text

Author's Note- My first Jasper story and gods! Do I love him? He really made me start writing up, not that the story was posted online but yet. Any way.

Requests are always open and well appreciated.

Thank you and Enjoy your reading!

Under the Moon

Jasper Hale x Reader

Summary- New life and new ways of living is overwhelming but Jasper is there...

Tag List- @chevelledahuman, @savagemickey03, @muushwrites, @chaotic-fangirl-blog, @nyx2021, @bi2simps, @thatgirlthatreadswattpad, @shit, @b-tchymoon, @instabul, @hukio, @carissa_griffin7777, @whotfatemywaffles, @dontdisturbme8, @mayumibeauty, @hermosa4285, @newt-scamander-is-hot-af, @andlizeth, @michelle-26, @a1icebxby, @5moremin, @storiesmaker6, @hc-geralt-23, @simpforfictionalmen, @ultrav0lence, @blackbluerose

Warnings- Mentions of R*pe, Blood Thirst, Blood

GIF Credits to @damonsvftie

The strong smell of copper drew Jasper to the highway connecting Forks to Seattle. The rain had stopped and left the forest green and the soil wet, puddles visible here and there.

Carlisle followed him closely, humming a tune while his eyes took in the silent atmosphere. The light sound of leaves rustling or the soft breathing of the sleeping animals echoing in their ears.

And in between them, was a shallow breath. As if the person bleeding couldn't breath properly, from an injury or a weight on the chest. The thumping of heartbeat slowing down when they reached the highway.

Near the side laid a body, almost lifeless with clothes torn apart to pieces. Blood covered her skin and formed a puddle beneath her form. Chest heaving but gaining no oxygen to survive for any longer than a few minutes.

"Stay behind, Jasper," Carlisle said, kneeling down beside her while checking for all the injuries she had. "She needs us, Carlisle. Her heart is too slow to be rescued in mortal form," Jasper said, stepping closer while avoiding the animalistic growls his mind played inside.

Carlisle looked up immediately, understanding what his son implied before shaking his head. "No, I promised not to change anyone. I can't destroy another life," he said, preparing himself to do a CPR. "You know it won't help," Jasper argued, making Carlisle sigh.

Carlisle looked up to find Jasper with tears in his amber eyes. And that is when he realized why Jasper was urging him to change her.

Carlisle only nodded, deciding not to question at that moment.

It was exhausting.

To be a vampire and constantly find yourself in a human's presence, (Y/N) learnt a hard way. While she didn't hate Bella, she just couldn't be in her presence without wanting rip her throat apart and devour every drop of blood in her.

It was Jasper who would wrap a hand around her waist while rubbing circles on her forearm. He stopped her from attacking the human all the time.

(Y/N) found herself liking Jasper's presence around. It soothed her and made her feel comfortable in her own skin. He helped her fit in, from teaching her how to hunt to explain to her the heightened senses.

It made her feel like she was some kind of damsel in distress and she did find herself frequently apologizing for it, much to the blonde man's dismay.

(Y/N) found him handsome. His long dirty blonde hair. His deep amber eyes. His sharp wits and features. His entire personality and his accent. He would always call her 'Madam', something she found herself liking.

He never really asked her about her origin, or about that night; but he did tell her about his past. Everything thing he had done. And as much as (Y/N) wanted to hate him for serving the Confederate Army, she just couldn't.

It could just not happen. Her hating him. Probably because it was him who convinced Carlisle to change her and grant her a chance at living. She didn't know for sure, just that she found herself seeking him more and more.

"You should let it out," Jasper's voice echoed in the valley as he looked at the woman beside him. (Y/N) only hummed, hugging her knees as she looked up at the full moon. "I don't know if I can."

"You can," Jasper said, determined. His amber eyes found her crimson ones, laced with intensity and loyalty. "You seem more confident about me then I am about myself," she chuckled, before sighing, the smile dropping.

"It was a friend," she whispered, eyes focused on the rock in front of her. "We were drunk and he offered to... drive me home," she continued, tearing up as the night became clearer in her mind. "He stopped in the middle of the road, said something was wrong with the car."

Jasper could feel her emotions spiking, making him wrap his hand around her shoulder. Placing his head on her shoulder, he spoke, "You know, when I was working for Maria. I thought I was doing right, but no. It wasn't that way."

"Could never do anything wrong," she whispered shyly, fingers tracing some unknown patterns on his thigh. "I did many wrongs in my life, (Y/N). But convincing Carlisle to turn you, it was the best decision I could ever make."

"I am grateful you did," she said with a smile, making Jasper roll his eyes teasingly. "You can repay me in the future," he said jokingly, making the lady laugh heartily.

"You know, you look breathtaking under the moon," Jasper complimented, making (Y/N)'s eyes dart everywhere but denied meeting his.

The empath smiled, his fingers interlacing with hers as they watched each other under the moonlight, blissfully.

#jasper hale x reader #jasper x reader #jasper #jasper hale #twilight imagine #twilight #carlisle cullen x reader #carlisle x reader

679 notes · View notes

6rookie-writer0110 · 4 months

Text

Now our shadow is gone

Peter Parker X Male Rader

Request: Andrews peter Parker x male reader where reader and peter have been recently having some problems with peter always being out and peter thinks reader is cheating and they eventually both have outbursts at each other? You can end it fluff or not 🩵

You have been married to Peter for two years now. You always supported him in everything and as a hero. Peter always supports you in everything even if you doubted yourself. You and Peter have been dating since freshman year of college, then broke up for a month then got married before senior year. But you and Peter lived in a small apartment in Hell's Kitchen, for a short time then found a better place.

Everything started to go well, you and Peter were in the honeymoon phase. But that changed fast months later because Peter would stay out all night. It was every single day, you would stay up late waiting for him. When he would come back, you and Peter would argue. That made you lose trust in Peter, you don't if he is saving people or having an affair. You felt lost and unsure about everything in the marriage.

It was your wedding anniversary with Peter. He promised he would make it on time and you couldn't stop smiling about it. You got dressed and went to the restaurant to wait for him. You sent him a text to let him that you are there. An hour went by and you are still waiting for him, but he didn't text back. You kept waiting and you sighed, now you are feeling about yourself.

“Can't believe I thought he would come” You mumbled

You sent him another text but he didn't reply. You keep staring at your wedding ring and you are lost in your thoughts. You wanted to cry but you held it in, then you start to look at the ceiling for a few seconds. You waited until closing time then you went home. Peter did arrive home but at six am and you just ignored him. Peter didn't apologize and he went straight to bed.

You start to work late and Peter didn't notice. Now, you and Peter don't talk or show affection to each other. You watched Peter leave the apartment and didn't say anything. Before he would kiss then tell you what time he will be back. You look out the window and he gets in a strange car. You stare at the wedding picture of you and Peter on the wall.

---

You came home with lots of bags. You went to the mailbox and tried to open it. But you dropped your phone and key on the floor.

“Ugh!” You whined.

“I will pick it up for you,” He said.

He bends down to grab your stuff and gave it to you.

“Thank you so much” You smiled.

“No problem. My name is Bucky Barnes” Bucky said.

“Oh that's right, the new neighbor. You live down the hall from me” You said.

“Yes, I do. Do you need help with the bags? I don't mind” Bucky said.

Before you can answer, He picked up a few bags. He followed you to your apartment and he put the bags by the door.

“I appreciate you helping me, Bucky,” You said.

“What’s your name? You never told me” Bucky said.

“Oh, sorry. My name is Y/n and I'm married to Peter” You said.

“It’s good to meet you. If you ever need anything, let me know” Bucky said.

“Thanks,” You said.

Peter saw Bucky come out of the apartment. He watched Bucky go into his apartment then Peter opened the door.

“Hey, Peter,” You said.

You are opening the mail but you don't smile at your husband.

“Who was that?” Peter asked.

“His name is Bucky and he lives down the hall. I needed help with the bags” You said.

“Are you having an affair with him?” Peter asked.

“Are you fucking serious!? You come home, and instead of saying hi you accuse me of cheating!?” You yelled.

“He seems your type!” Peter yelled.

“You have lost your damn mind! Wait, are you having an affair!? Because you are gone all night then you ignore me as if I'm your crappy roommate” You said.

“You are being stupid, Y/n. I'm out saving people!” Peter said.

“Screw you, Peter! You are out every single night! And when you are home, you don't bother to spend time with me. I don't even know what is like to have a husband” You said.

You and Peter go back and forth accusing each other of cheating.

“Where are you going!?” You yelled.

He didn't answer, he just left and slammed the door hard. You formed your left hand into a fist and you are breathing hard.

✯ ✯ ✯ ✫

You and Peter did agree to go to couples therapy. You went and you wait for your husband and he is late. The therapist would wait but started to write down notes. Thirty minutes went by and you got angry. The therapist started to ask you questions and you started to open up. But Peter never went or called you.

---

You and Peter have been arguing non-stop, it gets worse every time. He thinks that you are having an affair with Bucky and Peter stays out all night. You and Peter haven't tried to fix the problems, mostly ignore each other.

“Y/n, are you okay?” Bucky asked.

“I’m fine. Just a long night” You said.

“I know how that feels. If you ever need someone to talk to, you can come to my place” Bucky said.

“Thanks,” You said.

You go home. Peter is home and he still thinks that you are having an affair with Bucky.

“Were you with him again?” Peter asked.

“Peter, I'm tired of this and this so-called marriage. I think you are cheating on me” You said.

“What are you trying to say?” Peter asked.

“You are living like a single man and I’m tired of trying when you don't bother to try. I think we should separate from each other and I will move out” You said.

“I'm not cheating on you, Y/n,” Peter said.

“I don't believe you at all. When I ask where you have been, we end up arguing as if I shouldn't know where you have been” You said.

“I’m tired of arguing with you every day,” Peter said.

“I feel the same way. I think separation is good for us, now you don't have to hear me nag about what you do” You said.

You walk away and went to the bedroom, you start to pack your clothes. You and Peter are feeling angry and lost at the same time. You don't tell Peter where you will stay, you left and he didn't stop you.

#peter parker x male reader #peter parker x reader #x male reader #male!reader #male reader #peter parker imagines #peter parker imagine #spiderman x reader #spiderman x male reader #male reader fanfic #male reader insert #male reader imagine

101 notes · View notes

kaulitzhotel · 9 months

Note

hii! Can you do a like hc for a reader with attachments issues thanks

Synopsis: Headcanon of Tokio Hotel with reader who has attachment issues. (2009-2012)

Content: Fluff.

Notes: Here it is! Also, know that there are different types of attachment issues in relationships so that's why each one is dissimilar.

┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈

Bill

You are anxious all the time.

Uncomfortable being super close. Bill might not be used to love for you.

But he hates it when you push him away. He keeps trying to be close because he knows you want it but can't admit it.

Wants you to be truthful to him. “Tell me, what's wrong?” “I'll do anything, just talk to me.”

It would cause some problems in the relationships and make you guys avoid each other.

Tries his best to keep both of you happy when that happens. He can't ignore you forever. “Hey, you want to eat out tonight?” or “I'm going to the studio, come spend some time with me.”

When you guys do spend time with each other it reminds both of you of how strong the love is.

You guys joke around and even if you are feeling nervous he calms you down by hugging.

You guys have intense sex. Just saying. If you don't want to be close and be avoidant there's going to be a time of mourning for each other.

You constantly worry about where Bill is, what he is doing and have the urge to text him by the second. But since he knows you well he leaves you breakfast or any meal with a note, { I'm out getting groceries, text me if you need anything. I love you. }

He might be hot-headed but will stay around since you are worth everything.

┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈

Tom

He quite doesn't understand why you freak out about the relationship and tries to have a conversation about it.

He wants you to understand that he has a busy life with his music career but it doesn't change the love he has for you.

You argue about the fact he is always on his phone calling someone and never at home whether it's day or night.

There's some tension but he promises you that he will make time for you. “I'm sorry ill be here more or take you with me okay?”

You still feel insecure about the relationship so you let it be. Sometimes you will admit your insecurity to him.

He's surprised when you tell him but brush it off, “Why would you be insecure of yourself? You're fucking fine and with a big heart.” And don't mind him when he stares at your chest while saying that.

You would hit him on the head, “This is why! I'm just something you want to play when you get home.”

Know that he has a heart too so he isn't taking this insensitive. “That's not true, if I didn't care we would not be having this conversation. I wouldn't even bother.”

You ignore him and go to the room wanting nothing to do with him. You can't help but push him away.

He comes into the room jumps on the bed pulling you close to him. “You mean the world to me.” He knows you need him so he gives the reassurance. Everything will be fine after that.

┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈

Georg

You crave a lot of intimacy and cling to him for comfort.

He doesn't mind and he values you all the time making you feel special.

He also makes sure that the relationship will be healthy so some boundaries are being made. Because it would benefit both of you to have some personal time.

Maybe sometimes you get a bit selfish but he lets you be so it doesn't cause a fight.

However, you push him away when you guys take a break thinking that he doesn't love you anymore.

But he doesn't feel that way and thinks the love is still there and lets it be known to you.

“Please don't ignore me.” “Nothing is ever going to change my love for you.” “You already know how much I love you.”

You can never ask for more since he already completes that for you.

Spoils you a lot with physical touch. He finds it cute when you ask for it.

He's understanding how to work things but he gets quiet when you argue with him. There are tons of risks.

┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈

Gustav

You have a fear of intimacy and it worries him a bit. He probably isn't used to affection but will love to do it with you.

He starts slowly by hugging you a little bit to warm you up.

You tend to not look for any comfort from him but overthink what might happen if you were clingy.

But it's obvious in his eyes so he won't give up. He keeps trying till you give in to his arms, “It's okay to relax for a bit.” “I won't go anywhere.”

You might be uncomfortable being this close but he knows how to make it just right. Gustav never fails.

Sure, there might be some mistakes in the relationship because of the attachment issues but there was always a way to keep things alive and be there mentally.

He's just the sweetest. He likes to respect but also invades it when he's bored, “Do you want to go get ice cream?” “Let's go somewhere.”

That's what brightens up everything by the silly ness.

He will get real close and say, “I'm hungry.”

You guys have the best laughs.

┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈

₊˚ʚ ᗢ₊˚✧ ﾟ.

#tokio hotel #tokio hotel fanfic #bill kaulitz #tom kaulitz #georg listing #gustav schäfer #x reader #fluff #boy bands #imagine #head canon #headcanon #romance #attachment issues #tokio hotel x reader

183 notes · View notes

lains-reality · 10 months

Note

hello! i rlly love your blog and the way you explain things

how do i just apply? whenever i do i stress that i’m doing it wrong because i feel overwhelmed by the amount of info and things i have to make sure i’m doing right then i spiral and over consume again. i don’t want to rely on tumblr anymore.

what’s the simplest way to apply all of this and just “manifest” (i don’t rlly like this word bc it implies there’s a process or that i’m trying to get) my dream life? thank you

hi! ty!

it takes some courage! i also read a lot as a way to feel secure, but eventually i just got tired and just decided 'i have no more fears from this day on! done with this!' and i made it a practise to stop avoiding myself whenever something comes up

its all very natural, i can't say how you'll just finally decide that your over this lol

"whenever i do i stress that i’m doing it wrong because i feel overwhelmed by the amount of info"

well, learn how to stop yourself in the moment. you're putting too much pressure on your character! it only know what it knows now, it will not accept anything outside of what it already knows! thats why you leave it alone. read all you want to read, but stop when you feel like you have to. like you must. let yourself relax.

"i don’t want to rely on tumblr anymore."

good! keep going!

"what’s the simplest way to apply all of this"

just do it. try it and see. something that is a recurent theme in all the posts and book i read, is to try it. experiment. just for this one moment, let all the worries go. promise to never make problems for yourself again. you've given up troubles now, no more. just test it and see. surrender. let the mind cry and scream, for this moment, you won't allow it to deter you from freedom.

i'll give a list of stuff that helped me

theres only now -> stop bringing the past to now, learn to sit in the present moment

stop avoiding emotions, sit with the fear, discomfort etc

you already are Self! nothing can undo that!

be patient

non attachment (or detachment)

experiment - take something you already know and test it

question everything

find out what are the stories you want, what the desire will supposedly give you

it is not necessary to get rid of thoughts or images just stop deriving identity from them

"am i arguing for my limitations?"

soon more lovely thoughts and images will appear in your awareness and you can choose what you want

can you outgrow it? not you. observe it? not you. in the absense of it, you don't dissapear? not you.

be okay with not having it. get to a place where no one and no thing can disturb you (and your happiness and peace)

just see how absurd all this shit is. like i was born? what was it like before i was born? why is it normal to hear your voice in your head? no one knows what tomorrow is but we all worry abt it, where tf does the voice in your head come from? how can we actually identify feelings, what if the feeling pride isn't actually pride and you've been lied to? do you know how crazy this is for an infant?! we say we are an [x] person and that changes and so we say we are an [y] person, so who are we?? if we can change like that? being a human is confusing, seek the truth out and question all

just start to disidentify as the body-mind. when you disidentify as the body-mind you'll start to feel better as all the pressure you put on your character falls away. this will intice you to keep going as you feel freer!

have fun!! go and live life!! appriciate what you have now - this is all expressing the character, omnipr3sence, perfectly! you'll start to see "i barely thought abt x 2 days ago and now i see it here lol" "i was worrying about y and now i see it here too" "oh so this comes along with being the character too, maybe i should change that story"

you're in your own dream, see it as your dream and you'll start seeing the connections.

no need to convince the character, just move on. let yourself doubt this 'reality'

disclaimer: i'm still learning too! so please keep practising and have your own epiphanies!

reading

habit

no need to convince

behaviour

#lainsmail #to the other anon who wanted to start applying: here u are

264 notes · View notes

maple-the-awesome · 1 year

Text

It's Over? ||

Pairing: (any) Peter Parker x Reader

Words: 3,728

Overview: (Loosely based on this) After overhearing your conversation on the phone, Peter begins to worry about the status of your relationship and a miscommunication over text only makes matters worse.

Marvel Masterlist 🖤 Fandom Masterlist 🖤 Requests

Peter Parker's such a terrible boyfriend.

...Okay, so maybe you've never said that to his face, but he's convinced it's true and he's also certain you agree. He's been a massive idiot lately which is a realization that makes him sick with worry and rotten with guilt.

Peter feels no hesitation with his feelings towards you and has always put effort into proving it: he gets you hand picked flowers collected during his patrols, writes loving messages for you with webs outside your window, and even texts you pictures of sunsets from the best views in New York, wishing you could be there in person with him because he absolutely treasures you, counting himself lucky every single day solely because of the fact that he can call himself your boyfriend.

Unfortunately, he fears that the title might change here soon because no matter how boundless his love is for you, he's done a real shitty job of showing it - at least in the ways that really count the most.

Originally, Peter didn't notice the flaws to your relationship and even when he did, he foolishly brushed them off. Once your smile began to fade little by little each time he returned home wounded, he reminded you that you don't need to stay up waiting for him every night and can go to sleep earlier if you're just going to be tired and annoyed with him when he gets home. He didn't mean to word it so harshly. He was worn out himself and didn't take the time to consider that you wait all night because you're worried about him.

Your complaints about him returning from work without getting any groceries would simply be met with new promises to do so after patrol. If there was no food in the fridge for dinner, then he suggested ordering take out. As a man who could easily survive months on Top Ramen alone, he didn't think you'd mind Chinese food two days in a row.

Even when you'd beg him to stay home for a date night because you haven't had one in weeks, he'd push you away, insisting he needs to protect New York without once stopping to wonder how his priorities might translate in your mind: 'I need to protect a city of strangers as I do every single night, so no, I can't spare a few hours for my girlfriend'.

Throughout every sigh to part your lips, Peter turned a blind eye to it all. Sure, the two of you argue, but all couples do, right? He still loves you and you love him, it's just...a little rough dating a superhero is all, however you'll both get through it together, he was so sure - and that's the key word: Peter 'was' sure, but after your fight today and the self-reflection he's done since, he's not too confident anymore.

It seemed so minuscule this morning. He was eating a bowl of cereal when he heard you huff from the other room. Upon investigating, he found you holding a red and blue shirt in hand, frustration written all over your face. It was your favorite shirt and it definitely wasn't supposed to be that color. Of course, the reason for its unplanned dye job wasn't difficult to guess.

Peter apologized while explaining he was really tired the night before and must've thrown his suit into the wash without checking the other items first; an "honest mistake" he called it with a shrug. Once again, you huffed, throwing the shirt back into the hamper in clear defeat which only made him press further about your suddenly foul mood. From there, the situation only escalated into raised voices ending in you slamming the door directly in his face when he tried to follow you into the bedroom.

Looking back on it now, Peter realizes his apology came off as halfhearted as he merely continued to stuff another spoonful of cereal in his mouth in between sentences and he probably should've stayed at that locked door to give you a proper apology, yet regrettable that's not how it played out. Instead, he purposely sighed as loudly as he could, asking why you "act so bitchy anymore" before stomping off...Not the greatest way to resolve an argument.

Unfortunately, Peter can't say that was the first fight he's merely walked away from with you. You would think Spiderman would know better, but alas, he's an idiot. In his own immature mind, he didn't see anything wrong or unhealthy with this strategy of simply dropping 'unfavorable conversations', after all, it seemed he had a fifty-fifty chance of you either getting angrier or never bringing the topic up again, the latter of which has been occurring more frequently lately. It wasn't until this morning that he realized just because you don't bring it up again, doesn't mean it isn't still hurting you.

When Peter went back up to the bedroom door, prepared to tell you he'd be leaving for work soon, he heart shattered upon hearing your silent sobs from inside. You were crying because of him. Your tears have always been his weakness, but it was in that moment that he learned there's something else that can deal even more damage to his sorrow and that's the broken words you sniffled to presumably MJ on the phone:

"I-I just can't do this anymore! It doesn't matter what I do! I've tried to not be clingy. I've tried to give him space and let him do his thing, but he never comes back to me! I don't even remember the last time we've gone on a date. It's always New York this, Daily Bugle that. Hell, he volunteered to work a few extra hours the other day yet can't be bothered to stay home just to eat dinner at the table with me! It's like I'm last to everything else in his life even when I put him first in mine!"

The thought of your relationship ending turns Peter's nerves to mush. How could he be so stupid? So ignorant? Such an asshole when he has the perfect girlfriend who has kept putting up with his bullshit for all this time? You don't ask for much in return; you never have. You ask him to help with small chores in your shared apartment. You request that he texts you regularly throughout the night not because you need attention, but because you need to know he's safe. You want date nights every once in a blue moon because he's your boyfriend, goddammit! What's the point of saying you're dating if he feels more like a lazy roommate than an equal lover?

You're slipping right through his fingers and he has no one to blame except himself. He knows that now and he's been spending the entire day thinking about it along with some way to apologize properly.

Part of him wishes he would've just pulled himself together and done something right then, bursting into the room with the promise that he can change - that he will change. Hell, he'd burn his suit in front of you if it means you'll give him another chance - if you'll believe for a second that the relationship is worth saving...But alas, he couldn't bring himself to interrupted your call, feeling it would only betray your trust if you knew he had been listening to a private conversation.

Instead, Peter sat like a statue on the couch, waiting not so patiently for you to leave the room on your own accord. When you did, he leaped up only for you to walk directly past him while sternly reminding him you have work. Of course you had work and, no matter how far he followed you through the apartment, begging you to listen to him for even just a minute, you wouldn't so much as glance his way...The karma he deserves.

While you may not have given him any time to explain himself this morning, hope is not completely lost. Shortly after your departure, Peter came to the realization that his nerves will last all day if he doesn't do something about your earlier argument, thus he decided to text you:

Your final text hadn't come until ten minutes after his, but at least he has a chance to plead his case which he doesn't plan on letting go to waste. He's practiced his apology about a hundred times each hour, engraving the thought-out speech in the deepest corners of his mind despite none of it sounding quite right. Of course none of it sounds right! You sounded so convinced on your phone call - like your mind is already made up on ending the relationship. What if you can't be swayed? What if you don't love him anymore? It did take you ten minutes to text those words back. Maybe you weren't even wanting to say them to spare you both the extra pain at noon.

It may seem hopeless, as Peter worries, however he refuses to give up. Too tense at home, he took to swinging around New York while sometimes reciting his speech aloud. He's tried his best to predict any possible response you may have so that a counter argument can be prepared. He wants to show you that he means this - that he's confident in his ability to fix your crumbling relationship. He's even picked up a nice bouquet of flowers at the corner store, ignoring the weird looks the florists gave as Spiderman dropped from the sky just to nervously request the best flowers to avoid a break up.

Needless to say, Peter's heart nearly jumps out of his chest when his phone alarm finally rings at noon. By this time, he's already sitting on the rooftop of your workplace, waiting nervously for your call while reviewing everything he's prepared in the meantime.

Bad boyfriend or not, Peter still knows you. He knows you find the break room too crowded, so you prefer to grab your lunch and take it back to your desk to eat. That's when you'll likely call him. The plan is then for him to pour his heart out into his speech before hanging upside down outside your office window with the flowers. Sappy, yes, but it's the best a desperate wreck like Peter Parker can think of!

His focus is glued to his phone screen while waiting, only shattered by the sound of sirens nearby. Lifting his head, Peter's heart drops at the sight of several cop cars racing down the street to a location he's learned all too well throughout his time as Spiderman: the damn bank. Of course, someone has to rob the bank now! Crime has been quiet all day, but the one time Peter needs it to be so, it decides to be blaring loud instead!

He curses under his breath when standing only for his ringer to be the new sound in his ears. You're calling now! You're calling and there's a bank robbery a few blocks down! Why does the universe hate Peter like this?

"Hello -"

"- Hey, (Y/n)...Sweetheart - Listen, I'm, um," he bites his lip, watching a few more cop cars zoom by in the company of a firetruck," I am so sorry, but I'm gonna have to call you back, okay? There's a robbery at the bank and I -...I promise I'm going to call you back before your break is over. I promise."

You don't respond too quickly much to Peter's concern - as if you already know to start weighing the worth of his promises. When you finally sigh, you sound just as tired as this morning, "...Sure, alright. Just...be safe, Peter, okay?"

"I know, I will be! I promise I'm going to call you right back so just hold tight!" Swinging into the air, Peter holds the phone to his ear with his shoulder, soon removing it with his hand but pausing to say before hanging up: "Have a good lunch, I love you!"

"...I love you, too..." Another delayed response, one Peter barely hears before pressing the little red button on the bottom of his screen.

He's dealt with lots of bank robberies before. He can make this quick. Swing in, keep the sass to a minimum, web up the badies, save the hostages, and return your call with plenty of time remaining for your break. It'll definitely work out that way, no sweat!

It didn't work out that way...No, of course it didn't, this is the life of Peter Parker; a man the universe just seems to hate most of the time. Forty two minutes; that's how long it took to deal with the whole fiasco at the bank. The robbers were armed with homemade weapons each packing a punch which are already annoying to deal with on their own, but sided with the worry of hostages and his already stressful day, the fight wasn't as easy as Spiderman had planned.

Nevertheless, no matter what the universe decides to throw his way, he has gotten good at recovering. Yet again, the bad guys were defeated and left webbed up for the police, however Spiderman had no time to deliver a clever pun before his exit. Instead, he disappears the second the threat is gone, his phone already in hand as he prepares to face another:

"Shit, shit, shit!" Peter curses, pacing across the rooftop he lands on while frantically texting you back:

Swinging a bit further, Peter begins his way towards your work with his phone balanced against his ear. He mumbles desperate pleas under his breath as he listens to the seemingly endless ringing before, to his relief, your voice finally picks up on the other side:

"Yeah?"

"Oh thank god! I didn't mean it's over as in 'I'm over with you and our relationship', but over as in 'I got the robbers'. I'd never break up with you especially over text, I swear - Listen, I really need to talk to you, but in person. Are you still at work?"

"Whatever it is, can't you just tell me now? I have that meeting in like ten minutes."

"No, I need to tell you in person. I need - I have to make sure that we're okay...I want us to be okay..." He's nearly in tears which is obvious to you by the sound of his voice.

"What are you talking about?"

"I really don't want you to break up with me. I know I've been a terrible boyfriend lately and I know I've made you feel like shit so I probably deserve to be dumped, but I swear I never meant to and I want to fix everything - I will fix everything, I swear! You're the most important person in my life - okay, maybe second to May because she's my aunt, but compared to everyone else! I love you more than Spiderman or the Daily Bugle or - or even those super good sandwiches at the corner deli!"

"Peter -"

"- My point is I can do so much better! I'll start doing all the chores, I'll take more days off from the Daily Bugle and I'll even stop being Spiderman if it means you'll be happy with me, I promise! Just please give me one more chance -!"

"- Peter, hold on!" He instantly shuts his mouth under the strictness in your voice. You hesitate on the other end before a sigh can be heard, "...How quickly can you be here?"

"Give me two minutes tops!"

"...Alright. Meet me on the rooftop - and don't be late. My manager's already an asshole as it is, so I can't be late to this meeting."

The sound of Peter landing on the roof causes you to turn around, yet you have no time to say anything before he's running towards you with his mask already crinkled in his hand as well as a few measly roses with broken stems in the other, "(Y/n), I’m sorry. I promise I’m sorry.”

“Peter, your face…” Perhaps it’s just instincts and routine at this point, but the first thing you notice is the nasty bruise already forming under his eye, not that he’s the slightest bit concerned about that, in fact he doesn’t even acknowledge your comment.

“Please give me another chance. I’ll fix everything!” When Peter officially reaches your side, he moves to hug you - desperately wanting to do so, however he stops himself with his hands on your arms, having no more confidence to push his luck. You could shove him away at any moment, after all, “Like I said, I’ll do the chores, I’ll go on as many dates as you want, and I’ll stop being Spiderman even -”

“- You wouldn’t stop being Spiderman. You’d never stop being Spiderman,” contrary to his expectations, rather than being angry, you run a hand through his hair, your voice a soft whisper, “You love being Spiderman too much, Peter.”

He bites his lip and bows his head in shame. You’re right. He doesn’t want to stop being Spiderman, but…

“...But I love you more…”

“...Peter,” your heart swoons. Brushing his bangs away from his face, you tilt your head to get a good look at him, “I know you love me and I love you, too. That’s why I could never ask you to give up something as important to you as Spiderman.”

“I thought…” He trails off.

“You thought what?”

He glances at you quickly before directing his eyes away, “...I thought you were mad at me because of Spiderman? Because I spend too much time working - that’s why you want to break up with me, right?”

You blink in surprise, “Huh? Why would you think I want to break up with you?”

“I accidentally overheard you talking on the phone,” now it’s your turn to look away in shame, “You said you couldn’t do this anymore…That you were pretty much fed up with me which you have every right to be. I’ve been a terrible boyfriend lately -”

“- You’re not a terrible boyfriend -”

“- I am, though!” Peter cries, “It’s like you said! I leave you second to everything else - I don’t mean to, but I made you feel like you’re not as important to me when you really are. You’ve always been important to me, yet I’ve been ignoring your feelings and I pushed you to the ledge -”

“- Peter Parker,” you move your hands to his cheeks, moving him gently to look at you as you speak quietly yet sternly, “...You’re right. You haven’t been the most ‘attentive’ lately and yes, it really hurts to be tossed aside compared to everything else. I know deep down that you don’t mean it and I know you love me. I love you too - sooo much which is why I really don’t want to break up…It’s just…Something needs to change.

“That call you heard - I was only ranting if anything because honestly, I haven’t felt like I’ve had anyone to talk to lately,” you squeeze your eyes shut, blinking back the tears, “I’ve been so worn out with it all. Work’s been crazy lately with my manager constantly up my ass for reports and then when I go home wanting nothing more than to spend time with the one person who makes all that stress go away, you aren’t there. I’ve…I can’t keep that up.

“...What’s important right now is that we both realize that. I don’t want you to give up being Spiderman, but you could take a night off once in a while, right? There’s like a zillion superheroes in this city, after all. Make the Avengers handle it or - I don’t know, that devil dude. Take a break not just for my sake, but yours, too” you let your hands fall down to Peter’s, holding onto them with a sigh, “...You’re not the only one who needs to change, though. This is partly my fault, too -”

“- It isn’t your fault. Why would it be your fault?” Peter interrupts with concern, yet you shake your head.

“I should’ve communicated to you that I was upset. I should’ve made sure you actually understood how I was feeling instead of just assuming or expecting it. Clearly, you care about us as much as I do and you want to make fixes now that you’re aware of the problems. If I just would’ve said something sooner, it wouldn’t have had to get to this point. It isn’t fair for either of us to suffer without the other’s knowledge nor is it healthy. We shouldn’t have to get pushed to the ledge or worry about a break up before ever once sitting down to actually talk about our concerns like grown ups…That’s what we’re supposed to be now, right?”

“I think so, although it’s not that easy, is it?” Peter mumbles then throws his head back dramatically with a groan, “Ah, May and Ben made it look sooo easy!’

You chuckle, resting your forehead against him, “I’m sure they had moments like this…We just have to learn, is all.”

For what feels like the first time today, Peter smiles and breathes his relief, “How about this: I’ll promise to start spending more time with you and doing more chores around the apartment if you promise to start telling me when you’re upset. Even if it’s something that seems totally stupid, okay? I won’t walk away anymore. I’ll sit and listen and if I don’t, you have my permission to call May on me.”

“It’s a promise,” you press your smile against his for what you intend to be a quick peck, however his arms finally wrap around your waist, pulling you closer into a longer kiss he’s been dying for all day.

“I love you,” he whispers once pulling away.

“I love you, too,” and there’s no hesitation or delay to your response this time.

#spiderman x y/n #spiderman x reader #spiderman #the amazing spider man #x reader #reader insert #peter parker x reader #peter+parker+x+reader #peter parker x y/n #peter parker #tobey maguire #andrew garfield #tom holland #mcu spiderman #sam raimi #marvel x reader #marvel one shot

266 notes · View notes

dameronology · 1 year

Text

timing's a bitch (s.h) - 1/5

s u m m e r ' 8 6

you'll be the saddest part of me, a part of me that will never be mine - the loneliest, maneskin (x)

"if you have chemistry, you only need one other thing...timing. but timing is a bitch" - how i met your mother

a.k.a a.k.a the three times that steve harrington chose the wrong moment, the one time that you chose the wrong moment, and the one time you both got it right (series masterlist)

You made Steve Harrington cry the first time you met him.

He still remembered it clear as day, even though it had been in first grade. You'd thrown a Lego brick at his head and stuffed sand in his mouth, promising that if he ever touched your pet worm again (his name was Sherm, if you were wondering) that he would pay. After some negotiation and charm from his part - and the promise that he wouldn't make his parents call yours - you had become best friends. You brought balance to one another's lives, even from a young age. Steve was always a little more calculated and thoughtful in his actions, sticking to the sidelines at playtime and always worrying about his hair. You, meanwhile, had always run headfirst into danger, with scrapes on your knees and glue in your hair. Ying and yang.

You never left Steve's side and he never left yours. Things came close when the popularity really got to his ego in sophomore year, but it was nothing a whack across the head couldn't fix. The threat of telling every person at Hawkins High about his Farah Fawcett hairspray secret also very quickly humbled him. He owed you a lot of apologies after that phase.

Things were better than ever by the time graduation rolled around. It hadn't really hit either of you that this was it; that Hawkins High would no longer be your world. It was scarier for you than it was for Steve because he knew deep down that he had probably peaked in high school. He had no college lined up; while you'd gone and gotten yourself a full scholarship to NYU, all he'd done was argue with his parents about his grades and why they wouldn't foot the bill for him to follow you to the city. The world was about to become bigger and scarier. The prospect of you being thousands of miles away only made it worst.

"Just one year," Steve begged, "just take one year out. The new mall is gonna be hiring loads of people and you can save up a butt ton before you go to college-"

"- I am not taking a year out, Steve!" you exclaimed. Reaching across the center console, you gave his chest a whack. "I worked my ass off the last four years so that I have enough money to go now."

"Okay, don't think about money then. Think about..."

He paused, trailing off.

"Think about what?"

"Spending time with me before I go?" he meekly asked. "We can have loads of fun! Just me and you, y'know, having one final year together before you leave me forever."

You groaned. "Steve, we've had all summer together. Also, I'm not leaving you! I'll be home literally every few weeks."

He forced a smile, eyes focusing on the road ahead. This was his last two days with you before you moved and he didn't want to spend it being sad. It was just that his heart ached in a way he never thought it would. A thousand times more than when his parents didn't show for graduation; even more than when Nancy Wheeler left him.

Steve's glance flickered over to the photo tucked away into his rearview mirror. It was a Polaroid taken over the summer; you and Steve were stood between your parents, armed wrapped around each other as you were grinning in your caps. Maybe his parents hadn't shown for him on graduation, but yours sure had, with flowers and hugs and affection for you both. Hell, they probably wouldn't have minded if he moved into your room once you were at college. It was definitely something he thought about.

"Summer doesn't feel like enough," he muttered. "Doesn't it scare you that things are changing?"

"Of course it does," you replied. "Change isn't always bad though. Things can't always stay the same, Stevie. Me staying home an extra year isn't gonna delay the inevitable."

Steve glanced in his wing mirror, indicating off the highway and pulling into your driveway. You'd had to beg him to come and help you pack; even though he'd acted like he didn't want to, he was secretly delighted at the idea. In fact, he was secretly delighted at spending any time with you.

After yelling a quick hi! to your parents, you both bounded up the stairs and into your bedroom. It was pretty much stripped now, years worth of blue tack and marks and scuffs on the wall. Your entire childhood packed neatly away into boxes; some for college, some for the attic, some for the dump. Steve in particular was drawn to the pile of photos on your nightstand. It was you and him through the years - some were a little dog-eared and frayed, but the two little kids smiling back at him never faltered.

He put them down and glanced over at you. You were sat on the bed now, having discarded your clothes for a pair of sweats and one of his hoodies. He'd leant that to you last year after a day at the lake - naturally, you'd gone running in totally unplanned in your clothes. He'd stood at the side the entire time, too scared of getting his hair wet.

That had always been one of his regrets; holding back. Not just the day at the lake, but the time you'd gone tree climbing and waved to him whilst he waited at the bottom. The time you rode all the big coasters at Coney Island and smiled at him as you went by. You were always going a thousand miles an hour and Steve just fucking stood there, waving as time passed him by. And now you were about to loop-de-loop right away from him.

He watched as you frowned in concentration, hands scrawling away at a messy to-do list. Pack, buy new toothbrush, apply for job, find class schedule. It was the most organised he'd ever seen you.

"You're being awfully quiet," you commented without even looking up. "What's on your mind?"

"Nothing's on my mind."

"Steve, please," you scoffed. "You've been my best friend for fourteen years. Don't try and act like you're not deep in thought about something. What is it? A car? A girl-"

"- kind of," he said. "I was thinking about...us."

You peered up at him, eyebrows creasing. "Us?"

"Yeah. Don't you think we're pretty great?"

"Yeah," you smiled. "You're my best friend, Steve. Nothing will ever change that."

Steve sighed to himself. Wasn't that the whole problem? You were friends. Best, best fucking friends. And even though it was no secret that you yourself had little thoughts and feelings about him, they never seemed to overlap. You'd liked him when he dated Nancy. Then by the time they'd broken up, you were hooking up with the Dungeons and Dragons kid who had been held back two years. Then by the time that ended, Steve was onto his next fling.

And now you were going away. Maybe that's why he was yearning.

"Nothing at all?"

You frowned. "Nothing."

"Not even this?"

To be honest, Steve wasn't really thinking straight. Plagued by nothing but regret and hankering, he threw aside your to-do list and dove across the bed. His hands found your waist, pulling you towards him with might. It didn't take a genius to work out what was going on; even though his actions took you by surprise, you still tangled a hand in his hair when his lips came down on yours, the other finding it's way to the loop of of his best.

He pulled you closer, tongue slipping inside your mouth. You didn't mean to let out a gentle moan as he did, but fuck. Steve Harrington was a good kisser and it was annoying that all those rumours you'd tried to ignore in high school were true.

Steve sat up, pulling you into his lap. He moved his lips from yours, moving down to just below your ear. You didn't protest, instead dropping your head in the crook of his neck.

It wasn't until there was a knock at your door that you both jumped.

The sound was like a cold bucket of water over your head, snapping you back to reality. Fuck. You'd just made out with Steve. He had never been the King of Hawkins high to you; he was the kid that tried to kill Sherm over a decade ago. The same kid who got yellow braces because he thought they looked cool. The same kid that secretly cried every time Vienna by Billy Joel came on the radio.

"Honey, how's packing going?" your mum called. "I'm going to the landfill early tomorrow so make sure that you-"

"- yeah, I will!" you cut her off, trying to catch your breath. "Thanks, mum!"

There was the fall of footsteps as she walked away, leaving you and your best friend to sit there and deal with the consequences of your actions. You were still sat in Steve's lap, cheeks warm with something that wasn't quite embarrassment. His chest was heaving in time with yours, eyes refusing to break your gaze.

"What the fuck did we just do?" you asked.

"I...uh...I kissed you. And you kissed me back, and then I put my hand here and you put yours there and-"

"- it was a rhetorical question!" you exclaimed. "Oh my god, I'm still sat in your lap."

Rolling off of him, you landed on the bed next to Steve. You immediately pulled your hood up, tugging on the strings so that it tightened around your cheeks and hid your face. The worst part of all this was that you'd enjoyed it. Had the universe - in the form of your mother - not interfered, you had no doubt in your mind that you probably would have fucked your best friend. That certainly was a jarring revelation.

"Did you..." you began, but then paused. "Had you thought about doing that for a long time?"

"Yeah, I guess," Steve admitted. "Not like constantly but there's been moments over the last few years. And then I saw you sitting there in my clothes and we're about to say goodbye and-"

"- no we're not, Steve," you grumbled. "Because I'm going to see you at Christmas, and then like every weekend after that, and...Jesus Christ. Was that meant as an impulsive thing or an actual thing?"

He shrugged. "I wouldn't kiss my best friend of fifteen years just for one night. I could go out to a shitty bar downtown and find anyone for that."

"Why now?"

"Can you blame a guy for shooting his shot?" Steve tried to joke, but you didn't laugh "I mean...yeah. Maybe I was thinking about you and I being more than you and I. It seems dumb now."

"Your timing is fucking awful, Steve Harrington," you gave him a small smile, gently running a hand over his face. "You could have asked me at any point before now and I would have said yes."

"But?"

"But I'm moving half way across the fucking country in two days!" you exclaimed. "You're my best friend and I love you but our lives are about to change. The stakes are too high and you are far too important for me to risk losing, okay?"

Steve smiled, giving you a nod. It could have been worse - it could have been a straight up no. A why fuck would I ever love you? or a broken nose. It was still rejection, but it was just...timing. Bad timing. Maybe he just had to wait.

He was okay with that.

taglist: @marauderssworld @boybandbaby @karasong (lmk if u want to be added!)

539 notes · View notes