#i mean like obviously i didn’t move to la with the goal of working at target. but the goal was to find something to pay my rent first | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

jellyluchi · 3 years

Text

La Squadra x Gamer!Reader + spice

A/N: I’m not much of a gamer but I have been playing a few video games lately that gave me this idea. Edit: this was drafted mooonths ago when I was still playing Hades which I haven’t touched in a hot minute...

— Genre: nsfw, minors DNI

— Warnings: suggestive content, mentions of oral, fingering

Risotto

Tries to understand and play some of your video games if you decide to teach him, depending on the type of game he’s either really good or he sucks

Prefers to watch you play in either complete silence or let you talk and explain what the game is about

might ask you questions here and there because he’s a good boyfriend who takes interest in his partner’s fav hobbies!

enjoys relaxing decorative games or puzzle games the most. Also horror for aesthetics and good stories.

depending on whether he can tell if you’re in the mood (and yes he can tell) might tease you as you play

it starts with very light touches while you’re concentrating on the game and before you can even tell somehow you’re squirming!

very good at being stealthy when it comes to teasing his partners physically

might even use metallica to heighten your experience! your game is soon forgotten and you can’t remember if you beat the level or not

Prosciutto

Most likely to have you already on his lap when you’re playing if it’s his day off and he’s relaxing

a grandpa who won’t even try your video games unless you can somehow convince him with like.... a 45 slide power point on why he’d enjoy it, otherwise it’s just not to his taste

however, in the occasion that you do convince him, it’s truly a sight to see! This man is as intensely competitive as he is shit at games LOL (running in an fps looking at the ground with no camera control rip)

prone to giving up very fast unless you really walk him through it! Even then might not enjoy it unless it’s an interesting story or concept

will be more partial to games that tackle ethics and morals or are darker themed

But his favorite game is teasing you, you’re already on his lap and he loves giving you cuddles and if your having fun with your game why can’t he have fun with his?

It will be such a sensual and soothing experiencing you won’t realize when it even began before you’re panting a bit.

The best outcome is when you willingly leave your video games to go play with him instead

Pesci

Not big on gaming on his own but enjoys them very much when he plays, loves it if you invite him to play something!

Enjoys building and open world exploring type games the most (especially if the latter has some sort of fishing mini-game)

He likes to be creative with his building or wants to get immersed in some fantastical story

Is also chill with listening to you explain your games to him if he’s unfamiliar and loves watching you play

Now if you want some ‘video games and chill’ type situation you might have to be the one to initiate.

Whether it’s hinting at it verbally or physically he would need that confirmation

But once he knows what you want he’s not afraid to support you under the desk if you know what I mean.

Likes to hear your moans overpowering the video game music because it lets him know he’s doing a good job

Formaggio

He’s already your video game buddy most likely, and he gets playfully competitive to boot

Likes FPS the most, especially if it’s multiplayer because that means he can go against you and keep score who got most kills

But if it’s a story based game he’ll goof off and sabotage missions on purpose to see how he can mess with the game (gfx, mechanics etc.)

Also just generally a fan of shooting things in game because it’s satisfying plus he has really good aim wit all his practice

when he’s not in the mood to play he’ll comment on your gaming and get close to rub your thighs slowly

if you don’t get the hint he’ll get bolder with his touches until they’re on your ass and interrupting your concentration

likes when you get frustrated from his touches and considers it a victory if you drop your game to make out with him

Likes to make bets like ‘if you score ___ I’ll dive between your legs’

Melone

Not partial to gaming but definitely has gaming experience, mostly with rhythm games rather than traditional console or PC ones

He really likes to know the details of games from you and can listen to you for hours explaining your favorite parts

Gets into Sci-fi games the most, he loves the world building and the creative fictional technology that they come up with esp for space travel

His skills with the computer didn’t give him much gaming skills but it did allow him to get used to the controls quickly and he gets better with time

Touching you is something he’d rather do, even if its got an interesting concept because nothing is better than seeing you try to fight your moans

If you’re concentrated in gaming or explaining something he won’t interrupt you, but will invade your personal space till you get the hint

If you don’t, he will only inch closer till he’s touching you, first in innocent spots but eventually between your legs or your chest

Loves giving oral during gaming sessions, if you need support under the table he’s your man

Illuso

Never been much of a gamer but he loves to watch you play, especially when you get riled up. He’ll make lots of teasing comments about your gameplay to make you angry or irritated on purpose

He pretends to look down on your gaming skills only because he knows the anger fuels your hormones

He gets bored quick when asked to play, is more into the avatar making section of the game than the actual game

The type to run around in game going through the surrounding talking to random NPCs than actually playing

His boredom from the games usually leads to other ideas, abandoning his console he, very sneakily, gets behind you. Like a snake he’s quickly wrapped around your body before you realize

You would only notice when he’s making quick work of your clothes, he’ll stop if you ask but if not, and usually you don’t, he’ll tease your inner thighs

Doesn’t really putting his fingers between your legs unless you give him your undivided attention. If you whine, he just asks you what you want (may or may not give it to you depending on his mood)

His goal is to make you sexually frustrated enough to abandon the game and let him finger you instead

Ghiaccio

A competitive gamer himself, you may find yourself actually challenged when playing with him. More likely to play FPS than the rest.

He’s definitely vocal and focused when playing, comments on your every little move like you’re making the worst decision of your life

Thinks bets are stupid (because he’s gonna win, obviously right?) and accept whatever challenge you throw at him

Is super smug if he wins, but if he loses and you make him do something he hates he’ll be a sore loser and curse up a storm saying he’ll get you back for it

Ghiaccio takes things at face value, he’s not going to think you’re here to fuck unless you actually say so (in which case he goes very red not realizing your intentions)

If he’s particularly pent up though, he will wonder about the possibility of but won’t initiate it, you really have to be the one to rile him up well

if you play your cards right, that is, letting him win, handling his attitude about it, getting him flustered enough, he will be open to letting you sucking him off, courtesy of winning the game

the other much more fun route would be to win against him, tease him to hell and back and just saying “shut up and fuck me” in which case he will be more than happy to oblige after the stunt you pulled when playing

Sorbet & Gelato

These two are actually pretty accustomed to old consoles such as the n64, having had grown up during it’s time however you will still have to help them navigate any gaming interface properly

Most likely not used to PC gaming just yet but it’s terribly fun to have them watch especially if you’re playing horror and Gelato delights in the jumpscares while Sorbet really has no reaction

Very much likes the morbid games psychological horrors with gore, their favorite characters are always the unhinged ones

They’re both prone to comment if they’re playing themselves and it’s fun to watch as they’re barely phased by the atmosphere or general horrors of the game

Neither of them have much fun just observing you play your game, it’s more likely Gelato will get bored and whisper something lewd into Sorbet’s ear who smirks and they move into action

The plan is simple, they just want to see you squirm, won’t it be so much more fun to play if you’re taking Gelato from behind while Sorbet goes down your throat?

Sure, in that case you’d be in no position to play by yourself but in perfect position for them to play with their little plaything

they’re really not much for subtlety and two of them and one of you, it doesn’t take much convincing nor man power to get you on your knees.

158 notes · View notes

honestlyfrance · 3 years

Text

just feel; let’s exist

ship: sam/bucky

warnings: hurt/comfort, suicidal implications

summary:

“Where are you, Sam?” Bucky whispered, dragging his hand on Sam’s back, rubbing careful circles to ease the tension in his man’s muscles.

Sam shuddered at the touch, murmuring, “I don’t know,”

Bucky tries to keep Sam grounded for the night.

—■—■—

We’d all like to know what’s it like living in the Avengers Mansion secluded in the vast forest, the same mansion that you could only reach with a rocky dirt path, the same one where it stretches with its landing strips and pools, the same one where it looked more like a castle lost in the 16th century than one in the 21st century, and the same one where the sunrises were almost as perfect as the ones in Wakanda. Despite this description, Sam Wilson would tell you it was a noisy place, always full of fights and silent conversations—other times it’s a game of cat and mouse on who can eat the last platter of brownies before the super-soldiers can get to them.

Everyone wanted to know what it felt like to live at the top of the world, unbothered and untethered. Not even touched by the weather, god gifted and forever immaculate: What does heaven feel like? They’ll say it tastes like copper blood, everlasting and stained. Others would say that heaven does not exist, and it’s hell on earth in the Avengers Compound; constant tension in the hallways, there’s always a reason for thunder to break through the walls and shatter the mirrors. It doesn’t sound like heaven, and maybe it shouldn’t be called as such.

Most nights it did feel like heaven on earth, when the room was just the right cold, the water pressure was just right, and the hallways were peaceful as it can be on a Thursday, it’s almost as if you were on top of the world. Damned those who think not, it was better when it was empty and vast as it should always be.

It was always so full of life, and other times it was full of sorrow, resentfulness, and even, death.

This was one of those nights, the nights when Sam feels decayed and broken to the bone , almost numb at the overriding sensation throughout his body. It should’ve been illegal to feel this way, empty and vulnerable to even air, feeling as if you may crumble at the very touch of kindness. It shouldn’t be like this, but it always has to be; c'est la vie. What can anyone do?

Sam sat on the rounded couch in the vast living area. It had high ceilings, two chandeliers hanging precariously with its heavy diamonds and crystals; the couch was in an unlevel flooring, shaped for the large rounded velvet couch; the moonlight was streaming in the drawn open French windows that reached the arches of the walls; the rose bushes were in full bloom in view of the windows, full and lovely; the TV screen was sat atop a long desk, decorated with picture frames of the members of the Avengers all smiling and serious; the room was dim lit except for the moonlight, and there’s an uneasiness in the room. It was nearing midnight, and Sam didn’t make any plans to go back to bed.

Everything seemed to swallow him whole, and the vastness was only eating at his sides, bringing him down just to build him back up again with hope; it’s a sickening plot to take him down but his mind was almost peeling at the seams, and there’s a need to kill his overwhelmed senses before dawn, because there’s a ticking in his head that he had interpreted as a ticking bomb that would implode him and his thoughts when the sun would rise.

It’s saddening, how the world could beat him down into a pulp, taking his mentality and sensibility. The world has stripped him down to the bone and left his soul to burst into flames, an open-to-all show for the world to see. This is your Captain America! and you’ve let him burn to ashes! The world has left him to drown like an Icarus, burnt to a crisp and broken like glass. Nothing could ever piece him back together except for death, and even then it wouldn’t be the same. There’ll be an aftertaste in his mouth that would taste like gunfire and carcasses, and he wouldn’t be able to wash that foul taste without burying himself six-feet-under.

In the silence of the mansion and the dimness of the night, it’s here that he let himself daze into nothingness, feeling the void wrap itself into his bones, etching his fate with a pen-knife and salt, embracing his wounds as if the Mona Lisa to its Louvre. Sam lets himself decay with the stars, and if his fate leads him into his bed, then so be it; he’s lived long enough, won’t that mean he’d die short enough?

The silence seemed to ring in his ears, and there’s an ache in his chest he couldn’t cater to; it seemed too far away for him to reach, and if it was close enough for his fingers to grasp, it would turn futile. He would let it be; who’s going to tell him otherwise? There’s not a person in the world who decided to let Sam thrive, and even if they did, it was obviously not enough. Sam knew his worth, but did he know this could save him? Months of spiraling into the void, Sam has finally recollected and called himself “extinct.” Reminiscing would lead him nowhere, and the happy thoughts he had clutched onto had become stone; Sam did know his worth, but it only became his enemy.

Sam knew what it meant to know things and had felt things to conflict it, in the end burying himself in his own grave from the pressure of the world. Life has offered him endless tragedies and he has offered nothing but service, ruthlessly nice and angelic to the halo and wings, and it’d be a shame to have him drown in Atlas and the world’s burdens, but that’s what people make him do; stripped down to “support” and “partner” all in one, the world will forever see him in this facade.

As the ache in his chest began to sear him, Sam suppressed his cries to beg mercy at the world; he’s been abused to the bone that he’d let himself get down on his knees to beg for a sliver of mercy from the world. There’s tears rolling down his cheeks as he gritted his teeth, clenching his jaw at every sensation he felt. There was the need to numb himself, and he’d do that even if he has to physically hurt himself, to ache at the skin— yes, maybe that would work…

Footsteps approach Sam, breaking his soliloquies. Sam was left with ragged breaths, wiping his tears away with his bare hands when Bucky Barnes had plopped down right beside him, invading his personal space. Bucky was panting, wiping his forehead with a face towel before facing Sam with a splitting grin; it disappeared when Bucky saw the red in Sam’s eyes, and so Bucky immediately gave the man some space.

“Hey,” Bucky gently spoke, his hands wringing in between his thighs, “You— You don’t have to say anything,” he put on a small smile for Sam, but the man only sniffled, turning into convulsive sobs, “Do you want me to leave? I can give you more space. Do you want me to stay? I have some, uh, few ideas to get your mind off things…”

Sam turned to the rough fabric of the couch for comfort, crying into it as he choked on his sobs. Bucky sat beside the man, resting his chin on his crossed arms on the backrest of the couch; he had fear glinting in his eyes as he watched one of the strongest men he knew break down in pieces. There’s an unmistakable anguish in the air, one that brittles the strong with crashing waves, and Bucky feared for it.

“What do you need right now, Sam,” Bucky whispered into the darkness, and there’s a softness in his tone that just breaks Sam even more.

Sam looked up from his arms, a glare burying Bucky to the ground as he says, “Don’t treat me like I’m fragile,”

Bucky took a double-take, but nonetheless nodded carefully, afraid he’d hurt Sam even more. There’s an unspoken rule about comforting someone: Don’t hurt them even more . Bucky stood up, arms in awkward positions as Sam went back sniffling into his arms. Bucky’s heartstrings chimed to the tune of a love song, one that sings just for Sam; there’s now the only goal he had in mind: make Sam happy .

“Everyone’s fragile, Sam,” Bucky whispered, his voice barely above a murmur, but Sam must’ve heard it, because he stopped his whimpers and stayed robotically still, “Their brokenness only depends on how people handle them,”

Sam looked up, his lips twisted as his eyes searched for something in Bucky. “Stay,” he whimpered.

Bucky warily comes back in his seat, Sam inching towards the warmth of Bucky. Bucky wrapped his arms around Sam’s waist as the man leaned into Bucky’s body, nestling his head on Bucky’s chest. They lied down like this for minutes long, feeling each other’s breathing blend into each other. Bucky tries to even his breathing, already fearing the way his own heart beats deafeningly into the night; does Sam hear the fear and anxiety Bucky feels for him revibrate in his chest, or was Sam too deep into his thoughts to feel anything outside of him?

Bucky planted a soft and gentle kiss on the top of Sam’s head, and Sam instinctively groaned at the action; Sam’s body reacted by burying himself deeper into Bucky, as if it was still possible. If anything, they were practically connected into each other, atoms sharing and merging with one another they wouldn’t be surprised if they had melted into each other's souls by dawn.

Dawn .

Sam lifted his head, and Bucky whimpered at the loss of heat. Sam set his hands on Bucky’s knees as he blinked at the darkness, trying to figure out the murky shapes in the living area; he almost jumped when he saw something move in the darkness, only to realize it was Natasha Romanoff’s cat, Liho, moving around by the carpet. Bucky watched the back of Sam’s head, his eyebrows knitted together as he tried to decipher Sam. It seemed like everyday that Sam was jumpy and spaced out, almost like an astronaut from the many times he’s been into the void — Bucky just wanted to bring him back down with him on Earth.

“Where are you, Sam?” Bucky whispered, dragging his hand on Sam’s back, rubbing careful circles to ease the tension in his man’s muscles.

Sam shuddered at the touch, murmuring, “I don’t know,”

Liho is now on the other end of the couch joined by the other cats, Alpine, Goose, and Figaro; so that’s what those menaces do at night.

Bucky sighed, bringing back his grip on Sam’s shoulder, easing out the ache of the world out of him; if it was only possible. Bucky wished it was that easy, because Sam didn’t deserve an inch of this bullcrap, however the world seemed fit, angels just don’t need the burden of Atlas as if it wasn’t from different religions in the first place. If there was just a magic word Bucky could say to bring Sam back down on base, he'd make a song out of it— Anything. Anything that would give back Sam his control, Bucky would pick it out from hell itself if it could bring Sam peace and comfort.

“Why do I bother,” Sam murmured, his voice raspy and ragged.

Bucky hesitantly set his forehead on Sam’s back, breathing in the scent of him; he exhaled, saying, “We bother because we care,” he breathed in once more, his eyes shut closed, “Sometimes we care too much to feel anything. Which is why we rest… Feel… Breathe in…”

“I know,” Sam’s eyebrows furrowed, staring into the void of darkness as his idle hands grew sweatier and colder, “I… I can’t seem to do anything right now…”

“Then let’s just exist, Sam. Come back down for you.”

Bucky rested his head right on Sam’s back, eyes upwards as he heard the mewling of the four cats approaching them. They both chuckled at that, and for a moment, the world stopped spinning and had rested just for the two of them. Sam lied back down, bringing Bucky down with him; Sam curled himself deeper into Bucky’s chest as the other rested his feet on top of the mahogany coffee table before them. Liho finds a spot between Bucky’s legs and Alpine is soon behind him; the other two cats, Bucky thinks, should scram before the two of them do anything more.

They sat down for a moment, overwhelmed by the silence to move, and it feels nice to have the weight be lifted from one’s chest; there’s a pang of pain to breathe but there’s also the love that revibrates within the heart, and it blares so loudly between these two it shouldn’t be hard enough to stay oblivious to this.

“You don’t have to talk,” Bucky whispered in Sam’s ear; Sam hummed in acknowledgement, “I know. I know it’s hard, and it’s fine to be fragile,” he rubbed circles on Sam’s back with his palm, then his fingers, feeling Sam sigh deeply into his chest, “One thing I’ve learned is that… You should just exist. Alone or together, any is fine; just breathe and feel, Sam. The pain leaves like a bandaid,”

It’s probably near two in the morning when Natasha emerges from her bedroom on the other side of the mansion to retrieve Liho, scooping up the noir feline from Bucky’s legs. In exchange, Natasha had brought the two a blanket, and apparently Bucky had requested to bring his laptop and secret stash of champagne. No sooner had she left with her cat, Goose had followed as well, meowing all the way down the hallway.

“What are you doing?” Sam drawled out, suppressing a grin as Bucky laid out the blanket around them.

Bucky had set down his laptop on his lap, opening up a browser and going incognito; Sam watched Bucky enter a website that had too many ads for one’s liking, entering a movie title that had only disappeared from the cinemas just yesterday. The movie began to play and Bucky raised the volume, Alpine setting her paws on his arm as he did this. Chuckling, Sam popped open the champagne with surprising ease, laughing fully as some of it spilled; Figaro crawled on top of his legs, and Sam had run a hand across his cat’s fur as Bucky snuggled deeper into the duvet.

They took turns drinking the alcohol straight from the bottle, and no sooner had Bucky seen a smile form on Sam’s face, all gap-tooth and wide, it was too beautiful to miss, even in the darkness. Everything fell back into place, but there’s a new atmosphere surrounding them as explosions and guns blared from the speakers, their two cats purring in the background making everything harder to move, and their breathing was too close to each other to ignore.

They didn’t know who was the first one to lean into the kiss, but they both knew they wanted this. Long and languid kisses ensued between them, and Bucky’s advice ringed in their heads: Just feel , and they did; they felt each other’s skin against each other as their hands found their way to cup the other man’s cheek and bring them closer with a hand on the neck. They rested against each other’s foreheads as they breathed heavily, eyes still closed as they let the taste of the other be ingrained into their heads, never wanting to forget what love finally tasted like: it tasted like champagne turned into wine and the living room into an abandoned movie theatre, and it felt ten times colder but they were too warm in their hearts to complain.

They stayed like this for another movie, just existing together and alone, and if the world has decided that enough was enough and that they should break apart, just know this: though they were both fragile, in each other’s presence they felt too strong to even believe they were weak in the first place. Dawn had just arrived, and they could say they’ve stayed for another day.

#sambucky #sam wilson #bucky barnes #winterfalcon #sam wilson sundays #france: works #france: writing #sambuckyfic

61 notes · View notes

stephspurs · 3 years

Text

A Family Affair | Euro 2020 Football Fanfiction - BONUS MOMENTS

PSA: To all new readers, you don't have to read the series (link below) to understand this, however it would help so that you can understand the preconceived emotions behind the chapter!

The Proposal | la proposta

warnings; none word count; 1703 writing tools; third person until dashed line, first person thereafter. link to fic masterlist here

13th July 2024, Germany

Amelia and Ben had found themselves experiencing a slight bit of deja vu. The night before the final match of the UEFA European Championship, Amelia was sat in her hotel suite, finalising her preparations for the following evening. A rematch between the Three Lions and The Azzurri. Who would have thought that three years after the last final, the same two teams (give or take a few players) would be in the exact same position.

The difference this time, Amelia had more to think about than just her brother’s feelings. Her relationship with Ben had grown throughout the 3 years that they had been officially together. Countless family holidays shared together, and with each other's respective families had since become a thing of the past as they had successfully managed to merge both the White’s and the Chilwell’s together to create one big happy family. Ben had asked Amelia to move in with him only a year into their relationship, and although outsiders might think it was fast the couple could only disagree with them. They took each stage of their relationship as it came and when it came, just the two of them how it should be.

6 months after moving in together they had adopted a dog together from the local animal rescue centre, a black Labrador called Maverick who was bi-lingual and responded to both English and Italian, much to Ben’s dismay. Amelia began teaching both of her boys (Mav & Benj) simple words in the language of love and Ben had a harder time retaining it than the pup. Nevertheless, he loved hearing Amelia’s voice when she spoke to him in Italian and it was something he hoped he could hear every day for the rest of his life.

Amelia had continued her role at Chelsea FC as a tactical analyst for the first team, and Chelsea had honored their promise to the girl to allow her to work in depth with the academy talent which is something she found very rewarding and the part she loved most about her job. Of course she loved being around her friends and helping them achieve their dreams but there was something about fostering youth talent that made Amelia really proud to be in the position that she was, to help these young kids from all walks of life make it in the big scary world of professional football. The smile on their faces when they get a call up to an older division, the tears shed by their parents as they wave them off to go and live with their host family nearby Cobham facility, the same eyes that leak a whole different set of tears as they sign their first professional contract with the club - it makes it all worth it.

Something that was eerily similar to the last time Amelia was sat in her hotel room the night before the European Championship Final is that she was, once again, the tactical analyst for the Italian National Team. This time, however, there was no knock on her door with Federico Bernardeschi on the other side waiting to bring her to the English National Team’s base so she could have it out with her brother and Kyle Walker. Thankfully, her relationships with all of the England team had remained intact but that was largely due to another no-contact ban being enforced between her and the Three Lions. This meant that she hadn’t had a chance to talk to any of her friends, let alone her boyfriend Ben, in three weeks. It was painful for both parties, but necessary to ensure that there was no untowards activity or information being shared.

When Amelia was first offered the job she had sat on it for days before making a decision to rejoin the national team. Ben had actually been the one to push her to accept it, it was only something that would make her life better and he didn’t want her to miss out on any opportunity that came her way - even if it meant that the two of them had to be apart both physically and digitally for 3 weeks. That was the thing that held Amelia back from accepting the position on the spot, she would miss the person that became her right hand man. But Ben’s encouragement made the last few weeks easier, and also made Amelia realise just how ready she was to give herself to him...officially.

Marriage had been something that they had both discussed prior as a natural conversation between two people in a relationship that they could see was obviously heading in that direction already, so it was something that was always in Amelia’s mind. She had found herself at florists buying flowers for their dining room table and absent-mindedly thinking about the perfect wedding flowers for her bridal bouquet. However much to Amelia’s dismay, Ben was yet to ask her the most important question of her life and these three weeks apart have made her more desperate than ever to become Mrs Chilwell.

14th July 2024, Signal Iduna Park, Dortmund Germany

A torturous 90-minute match of football later and the Azzurri had done it, back-to-back UEFA European Champions. The only goal of the match coming from her midfield-maestro Jorgi, which was the direct result of a misplay from Declan Rice meaning the ball fell at the feet of Jorginho as he was directly in front of the goal, Jordan Pickford was no match for the beautifully crafted strike which isn’t anything towards Pickford, no keeper was stopping that ball from going in - it was just that good.

This time however, she was the one being consoled by her brother. The pressure of the situation getting on top of her, 3 weeks of no contact with Ben & seeing him for the first time out on this pitch but not being able to kiss him was getting to her, the knowledge that she was again partly to blame for their heartache. Her brother had seen the look in Amelia’s eyes when the whistle blew and the entire bench of the Italian team ran onto the pitch to congratulate the players, she had remained behind. Wrapping his arms around his little sister as she sobbed into his jersey because she was too empathetic for her own good was not how he predicted the outcome of the evening at all, but he was glad he was there for her. Pulling away from her, he tidied up her face and sent her on her way out to the pitch to wrap her Italian friends up in the hugs that they so well deserved, fully aware of the events to follow the wrap up awards ceremony that same night.

______________________________________________________________

I found myself standing in the centre circle at the Borussia Dortmund home ground, with an Italian flag wrapped around my shoulders and confetti all over the floor at my feet. Looking around at the fans who had stayed behind so they could meet their idols, I could not believe my luck in this world.

“I hope you’re not considering a job out here in Dortmund, Mils? I possibly couldn’t be away from you any longer” Ben spoke from behind me, pulling me out of my trance. I whipped my body around at lightning speed and launched myself at my boyfriend, my soul mate.

“Ben” I whispered into his ear as he lifted me from the ground, feet dangling at his mid shin and my arms wrapped around his shoulders so tightly as if to convey all of the hugs we had missed out over the last few weeks apart.

“Mils, I’ve missed you so much.” He said back to me, expressing the exact same sentiments as I possessed. He put me back on the floor and began to push me away from him, in my desperate attempt at a longer hug I wrapped my arms around his torso and pulled myself back in.

“No Mils, I need to see your face as I do this.” He laughed, pushing me off him again and taking a step back from me.

“Benj, what are you doing?” I questioned him, not really believing my own thoughts as to what was about to happen.

“Amelia, my brilliant Amelia. The past three weeks have done nothing but made me realise I never want to spend a day without you again. There are many ways to be happy in life, but all I need is you. You are my sunshine, you make me unbelievably happy, you make my good days great and my hard day's worth it just to see your smile in our kitchen at the end of it. Your brain is the most beautiful thing I have ever had the pleasure of knowing, and I hope our future daughter turns out exactly like you so that I have another you to love.”

Ben had descended to one knee as I stood before him, both hands raised to my face to cover my shocked by bright smile and both eyes stuck directly on his own. I hadn’t noticed the crowd of our closest people begin to gather around us to watch the show.

“So in front of God…” Ben nodded his head slightly, I turned my head to see he was referring to Paolo Maldini and shook my head with a little giggle which was copied by everyone else around us.

“...our family and closest friends I want to ask you the question that I know you’ve been patiently waiting for - will you marry me?” Ben pulled out the most perfect ring from a box that I hadn’t even noticed in his hands.

Dropping myself so that I was crouched and on both knees in front of him, I grabbed his face with both of my own hands and pressed the firmest kiss to his lips. My tears ran down my face and probably all over his, he kissed me back. They say a picture says a thousand words, and while I hoped that at least one of our friends had managed to snap a few of this moment, my kiss said only one word...Yes.

40 notes · View notes

dailyniallnews · 3 years

Text

Niall Horan: Live at The Royal Albert Hall

While some may argue that too few artists have done their bit to raise awareness for the people of the music industry who since March 2020 have been forced to stop practicing their profession, one artist who has stepped up to the plate is singer-songwriter and former One Direction star, Niall Horan. Joining forces with the crew-led organisation, We Need Crew, on 7 November 2020, the singer welcomed fans from around the globe to bear witness to a one-off performance from the eerily empty Royal Albert Hall, with all profits going to his touring family and technical entertainment charity, Backup.

In the lead up to the livestream, Horan could be found on almost every television network, promoting the show and explaining why the performance required the attention of all music lovers. In his own words: “I’m putting on this gig to raise awareness of the immense value they bring to an industry enjoyed by so many and do something to help them and their families. I ask all my fans to support them with me and buy a ticket if you can, and I encourage all artists to do the same.”

With several weeks passing since both artist and crew took over the RAH, TPi caught up with the crew behind the project and to get their thoughts on this very special event.

PRODUCTION ORIGINS…

“I remember it was a Monday morning when I got the call from Karen [Ringland] and Alice [Martin], who explained the concept of We Need Crew,” reminisced Ant Carr, Head of Production for Modest! Management. Both founders of We Need Crew explained to Carr that the goal of We Need Crew is, in association with #WeMakeEvents, to raise money for touring professionals who have fallen on hard times due to the COVID-19 pandemic.

“What really appealed about their organisation was that it was created by crew, for crew,” Carr said. “Around the same time, I was having conversations with Niall, who had already seen a few peers doing livestream performances, and we discussed the idea of performing in an iconic venue to raise awareness for the plight of the industry.”

With these two conversions in mind, Carr began to pull the pieces of would become Horan’s streamed performance together, as well as a big launch for the We Need Crew campaign. Carr and the rest of the Modest! team got to work reforming his touring family, whose album cycle had been stopped prematurely in March 2020.

“We were in LA when everything began shutting down,” stated Carr, who explained how he and the rest of the crew were in their last few weeks of promo before heading into rehearsals for Horan’s world tour. “We were finishing up a week on James Corden when the announcement came that the borders were due to be shut, so we all had to head back to the UK pretty quickly.”

After several months with no work, both Carr and the rest of the crew were all enthusiastic about getting back together to put on a very special performance. “In many ways, it was like we had never been away,” explained Production Manager, Andy Colby. “There was a part of me that thought it might have been a bit strange with it being so long since we worked together, but 30 minutes into the first rehearsal at SW19, it was like we had just got off the plane from LA.”

Colby was one of many familiar faces from Horan’s touring family who got the call to help with the livestream, alongside several technical suppliers including Wigwam and midnight:lights. KB Event provided a Megacube Artic for rehearsals in SW19 along with a Tech Kit for the show, oversaw by Lead Driver, Steve Crawley. Pulse Films and promoter, Driift were brought into the fold to make the event a reality.

In total, some 127,000 tickets for the performance were sold to 151 countries. “The response we had from fans was fantastic,” enthused Carr. “The funds raised are going to be able to help a good number of touring crew and their families and we kept this in the forefront of our mind in all aspects of the show.”

Carr was also quick to complement the attitude of the man in front of the camera. “Niall was very involved in every step of the process. He really gained a full grasp of the situation and during the promotion of the show, he really wanted to educate the public, and his fanbase, about what was going on in the sector.”

SETTING THE STAGE…

A few weeks from the broadcast date, a small group visited the Royal Albert Hall to make a start on planning how the show would come together. Lighting and Show Designer, Emma Bull and Director, Paul Dugdale led the creative vision. The livestream began with Horan performing a song on the piano on the venue’s stage, before walking down to the centre of the room to play the rest of the show in 360° in the centre of the hall. A top priority for the visual team was putting both Niall and the venue in the spotlight.

Bull elaborated: “Although several dance shows utilise the centre of the room, Paul’s Dugdale’s suggestion to do this for a music act felt fresh and was a strong starting point for the design,” she noted. “Having Niall and the band in the centre gave us a few options to really show off the building and take advantage of the fact the whole space was empty.”

One of her design ideas to make use of the space was to fill the empty boxes of the hall with lights. “It really ‘shined a light’ on the fact that there was nobody in the space,” she commented.

Aiding her in both the programming and running the show was Richard White of midnight:lights. “In total, we built 114 bespoke plinths for the audience boxes,” he stated. “On these sat a combination of Robe LED Beam 150s and Robe Spiiders.” The arrangement of these fixtures and boxes created a 360° backdrop of the central stage, with fixtures focussed into the room as well as back on themselves to flood the boxes.

The other key lighting elements included three Robe BMFL Robospots for keylight, which were placed in the venue’s gallery level. “We kept most of the control of these at the console with it being a 360° shoot,” stated White. “We were then able to shift the keylight/backlight across the fixtures as the camera tracked.” Around the central stage, the lighting team deployed SGM Q2s to provide some glowing footlights, along with Litepanel Gemini Softlights for Niall’s microphone position. “From the beginning, I knew I didn’t want there to be any rigging or trussing in the shot,” explained Bull. “We didn’t want anything to distract from the key elements of the shot – Niall and venue – to produce a clean look.” This is also why the visual department moved away from the idea of a backdrop and instead showed off the immensity of the famed venue.

Aiding both Bull and White in their endeavours was Lighting Programmer, Dan Young. In the lead up to the show, both Young and White spent several days in the previs suite at midnight:lights using Syncronorm Depence² to plan the show. “I have worked with both Dan and Richard several times and they have a great understanding of my aesthetic,” praised Bull. “I like things to be quite static in terms of colour palette with refined looks.” During the show, White oversaw the key lighting with Young programming all the moves. This gave Bull the freedom to act as a go-between between both the lighting and the stage to ensure the integrity of the design for the broadcast.

“The main challenge for this show was to provide consistent lighting over the different shooting styles,” mused White. “On one hand, we needed to have soft beauty lighting for close-up shots and steadycam work, but we also needed to make sure that the stage was physically as clear as possible for all the wide room shots and overhead wire-cam.” To add a level of accuracy, most of the live show was programmed to timecode because the visual team were situated outside of the room during the shoot.

LIGHTS, CAMERA, LIVESTREAM…

Jim Parsons was brought in by Pulse Films to assume the role of Producer. “By the time I got involved, the concept had already been fairly well developed by Emma Bull and Paul Dugdale,” Parsons began. “From my side, it was a case of getting all the video and visual elements and working out some of logistics of how we’d get the event to the finish line.”

Parsons has collaborated with Horan several times over the years. “The fact he came from the TV world means he has much more of a grasp than many of his peers of what goes into this style of performance and how to connect with fans through a camera,” he enthused.

Speaking a few weeks after the event took place, Parsons reflected on what he and the team achieved with the livestream. “We always knew we had an opportunity to do something different with this show,” he commented. “The end resulted was big and beautiful, but it was still ‘live’. It had the feel of a real show and didn’t come across prescriptive or dull.”

Parsons went on to describe the collaboration between himself and Driift, having worked together several times during 2020 on shows for Kylie Minogue and Sleaford Mods. “Ric Salmon and the rest of the Driift team are the kind of broadcasters I really like collaborating with in that they just let you get on with your work,” stated Parsons plainly. “They were obviously interested in the initial conversations and in the creative, but once it was all in place, they left us to it.”

Driift CEO, Ric Salmon offered his two cents on the project. “The fact that Niall ended up selling 127,000 tickets for the event is such a huge achievement, made all the better as it was all for such an amazing cause,” he stated. Unsurprisingly, 2020 was a busy year for Driift as the company offered livestreaming solutions for several artists. “There are almost too many benefits with this format of show,” stated Salmons while discussing the progression of livestreaming solutions that have only expanded in the past few years. “As we move forward, I think you’ll find more people opting for this style of event over, say, music videos,”

Parsons described what it was like working in the RAH. “It’s a beautiful venue, but we have all seen it thousands of times and there’s no denying that making it look different is quite a challenge. So, hats have to go off to the visual team for making this livestream look so unique.”

A Luna Remote System Junior 5 Telescopic remote compact dolly on a circular track along with a Dactylcam Pro point-to-point wire camera system captured the magic of the livestream. The spanned the periphery of central stage to present virtual audiences with a 360° view.

Camera Supervisor and joint Owner of Luna Remote Systems, Dean Clish discussed what it meant to be involved in such a prestigious show. “It was an honour to be involved in Niall’s show,” he commented. “It was for such a great cause and it’s always good to be in the Royal Albert Hall – you can’t go wrong with such a beautiful location.”

He continued to discuss why the camera selection was ideal for this type of performance. “The Junior 5 and the Dactylcam Pro are perfect for this kind of shoot because of the need to socially distance and, of course, with this sort of intimate production, they are both really unobtrusive and discreet systems,” he explained. “We’ve rigged the Dactylcam in the Royal Albert Hall before. It’s a brilliant system to use in there as you can really capture the essence of the hall from a height, in flight, in a way that you can’t with static systems.”

SOUNDING OUT…

The production brought back the audio double act of FOH Engineer, Matthew Kettle and Monitor Engineer, Joe Campbell to oversee the mix for the livestream and the band on stage. Having started working with Horan on his first solo album cycle, Kettle gave an overview of his time with the artist. “I didn’t really know what to expect before I’d heard the debut record and, as I was more known for working with rock music, I wasn’t sure I’d be the right fit,” he commented. However, with Horan’s solo music citing influences including Fleetwood Mac and Bruce Springsteen, the Engineer explained how it had been a fruitful partnership over the past three years. “Niall is really quite involved with the audio production and often during rehearsals will listen to the mixes to get a feel of what is being produced.”

Having been put on a hiatus since the tour’s cancellation in March, Kettle described what it was like to pull the pieces back together for the tour. “It’s really quite a different process producing a mix for a livestream compared to a live show,” he mused. “I have always had massive respect for broadcast engineers as it is such a different craft. When you’re mixing live in a venue, if anything goes wrong, you can fix it for the next performance. However, with a broadcast, everything is under much more of a microscope and under a great deal of scrutiny. Not only that, but you only have one shot at a show.”

Kettle explained that once he and the team entered rehearsals, they soon found their rhythm. “The approach to mixing was not too dissimilar to what we had already been working on for the tour. Just like the visual department, we didn’t want the production to be too flashy, aiming to simply reflect the intimacy of the performance without too much embellishment,” he commented.

For this reason, both Kettle and Campbell virtually replicated their audio setups they had planned to use for the world tour, featuring two DiGiCo SD5 consoles for monitors and FOH, along with Shure Axient Handhelds with Sennheiser 2000 Series IEMs, d&b audiotechnik wedges and a V-Series for side fills.

The console setup was not significantly different from the touring configuration, with multiple inputs from various SD-Racks in different parts of the stage and performance areas going to the broadcast SD5, all connected by an Opticore loop and shared with Campbell’s SD5 in monitor world. “The SD5 is my favourite console in the world,” said Campbell. “I love it and, because DiGiCo products are well proven and rock solid reliable, we rarely have to include them directly in what we do.” Cambpell was initially concerned in the lead up to the show, having not touched a desk since March. “Thankfully, Wigwam had kept the desks in pristine condition – so much so that our show files were even still loaded on the desk from the tour. This saved a great deal of time in rehearsals and certainly made it easier to get back into the saddle.”

Campbell was keen to replicate the same stage setup for Niall and the band. “During the tour, although he uses IEMs, I still have a wedge and side fills just in case he wants to take out his ears to hear the crowd,” he explained. “Even though it was a livestream with no audience, I wanted the show to feel as familiar as possible for him and the band.”

Despite a relatively “meat and potatoes” band setup, Campbell had just under 100 inputs on his desk – the result of several reverb returns and an elaborate talkback system. “Each one of the band members have a talkback mic so throughout the performance they can talk to one another and me,” he noted.

Meanwhile, Kettle’s ‘FOH’ position was slightly further away, setting up in a corridor off from the main hall. “Wigwam prepared an acoustic treatment kit so I sat at the desk with several studio monitors to mix the show and then sent my audio feed to the Pulse team,” stated Kettle. “Before going into the RAH, I was concerned with how the room would react with no audience in there to dampen the sound, but from the first sound check it sounded fantastic.”

Discussing Wigwam’s involvement with the project, Tom Bush commented: “We were all extremely proud to be supplying Niall’s livestream, especially as it was addressing the We Need Crew and #WeMakeEvents funds and highlighting what goes into putting on a production with the unseen and behind-the-scenes rolls.”

Bush went on to explain the approach to this type of performance: “A slightly different thought process can be needed – the standard positions for mixing, for example. The package wasn’t too dissimilar to the one we had ready for the world tour, so we had a good starting point. A few additions and tweaks were needed to adhere to the show setup, but Matt and Joe’s attention to detail made sure the process was smooth. The need for trucks full of PA hasn’t been required yet, but soon hopefully. We currently have a few livestreams pencilled in that we’re all looking forward to.”

#WENEEDCREW…

Looking back at the slew of 2020 livestreamed performances, Niall Horan stands out among the crowd, not only for its aesthetic, but because of everything it represented – not to mention the sizeable pot of funds it raised for the live events industry.

As we enter a new year with the live events sector entrenched in the clutches of the COVID-19 pandemic, the hope is that more musicians will follow in Horan’s footsteps to shine the spotlight on hardworking crew members that are so often out of sight and mind to the average live music lover. In the meantime, more information regarding the We Need Crew initiative can be found on www.weneedcrew.co.uk

#niall horan #article #rah live stream promo #13jan21

136 notes · View notes

4stars-uswnt · 4 years

Text

Surprise Animal Trivia [USWNT x Reader]

requested by anon: I don't know if requests are still open but if they are can you do one where the reader just doesn't really talk a lot but they find out one way to have a conversation is to talk about animals since she loves them. Sorry if it doesn't make sense

A/N: this was super fun to write, and i actually learned some things about dolphins and discovered what an okapi is, so thanks for this request!

“Hey, kiddo! It’s good to see you again.” Kelley smirks, as she wraps her arm around your shoulder, ruffling your hair.

“You saw me two days ago.” You deadpan, rolling your eyes at your club teammate. At only 18 years old, you had been on the national team for the past two years. You were a naturally quiet, timid person, but you became even more shy when at camps, not only because you were surrounded by many of your role models but also because you were scared to mess up as the youngest on the team.

“You ready for camp?” She asks, as the two of you make your way to the team meeting.

You only nod in response. Kelley chuckles, opening the door for you.

Upon entering, you receive many cheers and greetings.

“It’s my favorite youngster!” Ashlyn calls out.

“(Y/N), come sit by me.” Pinoe waves you over.

“(Y/N/N)!” Sonny shouts.

You sheepishly duck your head and make your way to the front of the room. Although you were one of the best midfielders in the country, you always took team meetings and film sessions very seriously because you wanted to prove to the coaches that you deserved to be here.

As the meeting starts, you listen intently and keep to yourself, whereas a couple of your teammates were whispering and cracking a couple of jokes.

“Alright, well I’m excited to get started.” Vlatko claps his hands together. “I’ll see you all out on the pitch.”

—————

On the field, you were a completely different animal. Although you weren’t the most vocal or the most celebratory, you tore up the field, scoring goals and making your own teammates look like fools.

“Damn, kid. You did not come to play.” Kelley huffs, after you beat her and slot the ball in the lower corner past Ashlyn.

You look down, a small smirk on your face, as Vlatko blows the whistle, ending training for the day.

“Thank goodness you were on my team today.” Alex smiles.

“Jeez, (Y/N), you couldn’t take it a little easier on me.” Ash teases, pulling her gloves off.

“Uh, thanks guys.” You mumble, rubbing the back of your neck.

“(Y/N/N)! You were incredible! You’re definitely gonna play this weekend.” Mal jumps on your back, kissing your cheek.

“Thanks, Mal.” You blush.

“Alright you two, let’s get going.” Christen laughs, moving you along towards the bus.

You slide into your window seat, Kelley following right after you. As your scrolling through your phone, you can feel the defender staring at you with a large grin across her face.

“What?” You turn to look at the other woman.

“What’s going on with you and Mal?” Kelley smirks.

“Nothing!” You exclaim.

“You sure? Not even a little crush.”

“I’m sure.” You insist, your cheeks flushing.

“Mkay.” The freckled woman hums and turns across the aisle to talk to Alex and Allie.

You put your headphones on, contently listening to music for the rest of the bus ride.

—————

The team had decided to go out to dinner in downtown LA that evening, Christen and Alex knowing the best restaurants in the city. On the way there, you stuck with the youngsters not really saying much. Noticing your quietness, Mal drifts over to you.

“Hey.” She wraps her arm around your waist. “How are you doing?”

“Good.” You lean your head on her shoulder.

Mal furrows her eyebrows at your short response. “Are you nervous?” She asks, genuinely curious.

“Mhm. I’m just a little shy.”

Mal softens at your confession. “You’re cute.” She cheekily grins.

You blush, giving her a small smile. “Thanks.”

Mal nods, beaming, before she returns to the crazy story Emily was telling.

��————

As the team waits for their food, the table is filled with boisterous and energetic conversation.

“(Y/N)!” Ashlyn call from across the table. “Did Kelley really beat both Becky and Chris in Monopoly?”

“Huh?” You tilt your head, confused by the randomness of the question.

“We’re trying to settle a debate here. So did she?” Megan explains.

“No.” You bluntly confirm, resulting in a burst of laughters and howls from the veteran side of the table.

“So, (Y/N), how are you settling in with the Royals?” Tobin asks.

“I like Utah.” You nod.

The older forward chuckles. “You still a little shy?”

You bashfully shake your head.

“Tobes, you know (Y/N). She’s our shy little baby.” Kelley coos, pinching your cheek.

“Stop, Kel.” You mumble, swatting her hand away.

Once the food arrives, you immediately dig in. The team continues exchanging stories and cracking jokes, all while shoving food into their mouths. After the meal, as you’re all waiting for the check, Kelley pulls out her phone.

“Janice, did you see this post?” She shows the forward a photo of a dolphin with their nose against a pregnant woman’s stomach.

“Ha! Al, you should’ve done that.” Allie snorts.

“What is that even for?” Alex rolls her eyes at her best friends.

“The dolphin can detect the baby inside her stomach because of their echolocation. It basically acts like an ultrasound.” You explain, overhearing their conversation.

Everyone stops and turns to stare at you, surprised that you’d spoken more than a couple of words.

“How do you know that?” Megan asks.

“Uhh.” You shrink under the gaze of your teammates. “I just know a lot animals. Like did you know that dolphins don’t even chew their food? Or that they have two stomachs? Or that they only sleep with half of their brain?” You vibrate with excited energy.

The rest of the women smile at you, amused by your mini rant.

“I didn’t know you liked animals so much.” Mal pipes from next to you.

“Yeah. I mean, obviously, there are so many different kinds of animals, so there’s just so much to learn.”

“So what’s your favorite animal?” Christen asks.

“Hmm.” You purse your lips, considering your options. “Probably the Okapi.”

“What the hell is an Okapi?” Emily calls out.

“It’s the only living relative to the giraffe, but it looks like a cross between a deer and a zebra.” You elaborate, as you search up a picture to show the table.

“Aw, it’s kinda cute.” Rose coos.

You nod in agreement. “What’s really cool is that they have scene glands on the bottom of their hooves to mark its territory!” You wave your hands enthusiastically.

“Ha, I guess we should just bring up animals if we wanna hear you talk.” Kelley teases.

“Uh, I guess. I mean I could go on about animals.” You scratch the back of your neck and chuckle nervously. “And I’m sorry I don’t really talk a lot. I’m just really shy and wanna impress you guys.” You mumble out a confession, looking down at your fidgeting hands.

“Kid, you impress us all the time.” Tobin assures.

“Seriously, (Y/N). You’re one of the best midfielders in the world right now, AND you’re not even twenty years old yet!” Alex exclaims.

The rest of the woman add their own comments, boosting your confidence

Mal smiles softly and takes your hand into hers, giving you a comforting squeeze. “You are an amazing person and player, (Y/N), and we love you just the way you are, so if you don’t like talking a lot, we’ll still love you.”

You feel your cheeks redden and your heart burst. “Thanks you guys. I really do see you guys as a second family, having practically grown up with all of you.”

“AWWWWW! We see you as family too!” Kelley cries, placing a wet kiss onto your cheek.

“OK, that’s enough, Kel.” You scrunch your nose, playfully wiping your cheek.

“But you’re my little kiddo, and I’m your team mom.” The defender pouts.

“Hey! I thought I was her team mom.” Christen interjects.

“Both of you are my team moms.” You roll your eyes at the two women. “And Becky.” You look at the blonde woman, acknowledging her with a small smile. Beck nods, a silent thank you.

“(Y/N/N), you ever been to the LA Zoo?” Alex asks.

You shake your head. “I’ve actually never been to a zoo before.”

Many of the women’s jaws drop, especially since you’d just revealed your immense love for animals.

“You’ve never been to a zoo?” Ali blurts.

“No.” You murmur. “My parents were always working when I was growing up, so we never really did any of that kind of stuff.”

“Well, we have the day off tomorrow.” Alex sings. “Wanna go?”

“Yes!” An earsplitting grin breaks out across your face, as you nod eagerly. “Can the whole team come?” You sheepishly request.

“Duh!” Kelley responds, causing you to smile and the rest of the table to cheer.

You can’t help but shake with excitement, bouncing in your seat. You were looking forward to the trip to the zoo tomorrow and couldn’t wait not only to learn about the animals you were so passionate about but also spend time with the women you loved so much.

#uswnt x reader #uswnt imagine #uswnt imagines

298 notes · View notes

komkommertijd · 3 years

Text

F1 2020 Grid as German rap songs

Since the 2020 season has come to an end, I thought it might be a good idea to finally share this thing that I’ve been working on since June. I have no idea as to why or how I had this idea, but I’m sure I’m not the first one to do this, anyway. I’m sorry to all my fellow Germans in advance <3

Disclaimer: I translated all of the lyrics myself so some things might not be completely accurate, for which I can only apologize. I do not agree with the way some rappers portray women, so I made sure to steer clear from those lyrics.

(post under the cut because it got kinda very long whoops)

Lewis - Vintage (RIN)

Oh Lord, wo soll das Ganze enden? Fahr' so schnell, ich wechsel' jede Woche Bremsen

[Oh Lord, where is this supposed to end? Driving so fast, I’m changing brakes every week]

It’s a song about being a champion, living a luxury life, nice clothes, and well...driving fast cars. Any more questions? Rin is one of my favorite German rap artists, so I just had to include his songs, and this one makes you feel like a real badass, just like our king Lewis 😌

Valtteri - In meinem Benz (AK Ausserkontrolle, Bonez MC)

Du siehst mich im Benz sitzen, so wie Lewis Hamilton

[You see me sitting in a Benz, just like Lewis Hamilton]

It’s kind of obvious why I chose that song, right? Other than that specific line there are some more parts about how much the rapper apparently loves his Mercedes and this song just screamed Valtteri to me.

Charles - NENENE (Fero47)

Sitze bald in roten Ferrari Geben Gas in der Hood Ruf' ich danach, "C'est la vie!"

[I’ll soon sit in a red Ferrari Rev up in my hood Shouting “C’est la vie!” afterward]

Ignoring the entire part about Monte Carlo and all the French words, this specific part just always reminds me of Charles when I listen to the song. More badass vibes but less seriously so because I can’t take Fero’s voice that serious at all, which fits Charles.

Sebastian - Ferrari (Eno, MERO)

Roter Ferrari Ich gebe Gas in einem Ferrari Roter Ferrari Yeah, ich sitze tief in einem Ferrari

[Red Ferrari I rev up in a red Ferrari Red Ferrari Yeah, I’m sitting deep inside a Ferrari]

There’s a part about “rolling with [a] bro in a white Mercedes” and my brain said Sewis rights. Other than that, this is once again a rather obvious choice, if not all that up to date anymore. Some lines about racing on the German highway, so of course I had to go for Sebastian with this one.

Max - Fame (Apache207)

Die Rapszene ist nur ein Affenzirkus In dem kleine Kinder gern mit Waffen hantieren Ich steh', wo ich steh', weil ich bin, wer ich bin Und nicht weil hier irgendjemand Apache platziert

[The rap scene is a madhouse Where little kids like to make use of guns I stand where I stand because I am who I am And not because someone places Apache]

This simply gives me Max vibes, I don’t have much more to say as an explanation. It just feels right, with criticism towards mentally “weaker” individuals and the confidence in making a name for oneself based on own achievements and hard work. Also, Apache has become a rather popular musician in the past year(s) (especially to obnoxious 5th graders, all tea no shade), which is just...Max, I won’t elaborate.

Alex - HONDA (Ansu)

Hold on, kommt was Schnell – Konter Dreamer, besonders – Willy Wonka Auto – Honda

[Hold on, there’s something coming Fast - Counterattack Dreamer, special - Willy Wonka Car - Honda]

I mean, it’s a song about a Honda driver? I struggled quite a bit with finding a song for Alex, but when I first listened to this song, my mind threw his name at me in blinking neon letters, so this is the vibe we’re going with - a funky fast Honda driver <3 (PS: I have no clue what the Willy Wonka thing is about but....why not)

Carlos - Habibi (Casar)

Sie schreibt: "Habibi", denn sie vermisst mich Ich fahre weit davon mit mein'n Hermanos

[She texts me “Habibi” because she misses me I drive far away with my hermanos]

I can only listen to the word “hermanos” so many times without my mind associating it with Carlos, so this one was a rather obvious choice for me as well. Also, there are some parts about Spain in this song so I had to be lame and do the obvious with this one.

Lando - 500 PS (Bonez MC, RAF Camora)

Ich drück' aufs Gas, hör' die 500 PS Fahren durch die Stadt, GTA Los Angeles

[I step on the gas, hear the 500 HP Cruising through the city, GTA Los Angeles]

This one’s a solid mainstream German rap song (not that I’d call Lando a mainstream person), liked to some extent by most people, and it gets you moving, which reminds me a lot of Lando. Cars and mentions of a video game make for a hit and Lando unites just that in person as well.

Daniel - Emotions 2.0 (Ufo361, Céline)

Baby, nimm einen Schluck Dom P. für die Emotions Ich erhöhe deine Dosis So viel Schmuck Mehr Drip als ein Ocean

[Baby take a sip Dom P for the emotions I’m increasing your dosage So much jewelry More drip than an ocean]

A bittersweet love song with rich boy summer vibes and one of my favorite German songs to be released this year, in fact, it’s my most listened to song on my phone, make for a combination that just screams Daniel to me. This song hits different when driving into the sunset in a fancy car or when biking through town at 1:30 am on three cans of Red Bull (believe me, I tried), and always reminds me of better times. It’s the ideal song to sing and rap along to, so that matches Daniel just fine.

Esteban - Einsneunzig (Brown-Eyes White Boy)

Bin fast einsneunzig, stell' mich auf die Bündel, das' ein Weltrekord Lass' die Zeit Revue passier'n, selbe Jungs und selber Ort

[I’m almost 1.90, stand on a wad of cash, that’s a world record Let’s recall the past, same guys and same place]

1.90 meters as a reference to Esteban’s height, obviously, simply made sense to me, once again. The second line reminds me of his feud with Pierre, so I had to choose this song. It’s better than Ratten im Hof (rats in the yard), and this reminds me of a wannabe gangster, which just screams Esteban to me, I’m sorry <3

Pierre - DAS RENNEN (RIN)

Ich hoff', eines Tages, wir gewinn'n das Rennen Wie bei Red Dead Redemption Irgendwann der Letzte wie Shanks Spinner Rims glänzen

[I hope one day we win the race Just like in Red Dead Redemption One day the last like Shanks Spinner rims are shining]

I know no one will believe this story but I started working on this post like half a year ago and I chose that song for Pierre back then and uhm, manifestation worked, I guess? Once again, I’m a big fan of Rin’s music, so choosing this song for Pierre is a bit like selfcare. The lyrics mention changing the world and well, so far Pierre has as least changed my world 😌

Daniil - One Night Stand (Capital Bra)

Ty moja ljubimaja Takaja diwnaja, krasiwaja-ja Sprawjedliwaja, njepobjedimaja Ty moja-ja, Baby, ty moja-ja

[You are my darling Such a wondeful, beauty Fair, invincible You’re mine baby, you’re mine]

I really hope I got that translation more or less right but other than that, I didn’t simply choose that song based on the Russian part. It’s a song we used to listen to a lot a few years ago and one of those from the days where Capital Bra was famous but less so than he is today. It reminds me of simpler times and it’s a pretty vibey song that, if you allow it to, draws you in and makes you dance. I have a soft spot for Daniil and the song reminds me a bit of him.

Lance - Bronx (Veysel)

Du musst doppelt zahlen, deshalb krieg' ich es umsonst Audemars, Yves Saint Laurent, eine Villa irgendwo Audemars, Yves Saint Laurent, ein paar Villen irgendwo

[You have to pay double that’s why I get it for free Audemars, Yves Saint Laurent, a mansion somewhere Audemars, Yves Saint Laurent, a few mansions somewhere]

This is a song that you have to listen to on high volume in a fast car, one that once again has really badass vibes. It’s nice to rap along to and hard not to move to. The rich boy vibes in the chorus that I’ve included in this post are pretty inevitable and logically, I had to associate that with Lance. When I turn this song on, everyone enjoys it, and I think Lance deserves to evoke that emotion in everyone as well.

Sergio - AVENTADOR (Dardan, Eno, Noah)

Roll' im Aventador Ich fahr' grad vor Gebe Gas, sag': "¡Adiós!"

[Roll in an Aventador I hit the road Step on the gas, say “¡Adiós!”]

I mean yeah, I could have chosen that song only because of the Adiós but that’s a bit lame even for me. Instead, the entire fast car vibe reminded me a lot of Checo. I’ve always had a bit of a soft spot for him and this year he once again showed people ([coughs] my brother) that he’s been severely underestimated. So stepping on the gas and outpacing everyone else felt like the right vibe.

Kimi - Sorry Not Sorry (Monet192, Takt32, badmómzjay)

Was du für Karriere machst, mach' ich als Hobby Was du für Probleme hast, interessiert keinen

[What you made your career, I do as a hobby What problems you have, no one cares]

The title itself embodies Kimi and so does the entire song. The not giving a shit vibe, paired with the mention of the hobby thing as an indirect reference to the famous Kimi quote about seeing his job more as a hobby, are just 100% Kimi. I really couldn’t have found a better song for him.

Antonio - Maserati (RAF Camora)

Capo dei capi Trip noch im Alfa, doch bald Maserati

[Capo dei capi Trip still in an Alfa but soon in a Maserati]

I did very much not choose the song because “capo dei capi” (the boss of bosses) is a mafia related thing, but because of the Alfa part, duh. Roadtrips in an Alfa along the Adriatic coast are cool and all but a Maserati is obviously the main goal, and that reminds me of Antonio quite a lot ~for some reason~. The entire part about making it far in life without a “serious” job is just very F1, so the vibes are there. Happy very belated birthday Toni <3

Romain - HOCH (CRO)

Alles holt dich down, lass es einfach los Und die Dinge unter dir sind gar nicht mehr so groß Ich schau' nach oben und auf einmal geht's hoch

[Everything drags you down, just let it go And the things below you are not as big anymore I look up and suddenly it goes upwards]

This song is just very peaceful and calms my mind when I listen to it, which radiates the same comforting vibe as Romain. The topic of rising despite things dragging you down are a very prominent topic here and reminded me a lot of him, especially with him leaving Haas and everything around that. It just feels nice to listen to a bit of an uplifting song once in a while, and this one does it in a way that still allows you to feel calm and safe, which is something I associate with Romain a lot.

Kevin - Vorbei (Nico Rosseburg, Sierra Kidd)

Sag mir bitte, wie passe ich die Zeit? Der Augenblick war schön, doch es ist vorbei

[Please tell me, how do I pass the time? The moment was nice but now it’s over]

With Kevin leaving F1, I had to go for this song for him. It’s a bit more of a sad topic (so am I with the knowledge of him not being there next year) but without making the entire thing sound melancholic. I only really learned to appreciate Kevin this year and I’ll miss having him around, so this song kind of fits that idea for me.

George - 20 Zoll MAE (Celo&Abdi, Bonez MC)

Ich fahr' mit Schrittgeschwindigkeit, so wie ein Don Hättest gerne meine Felgen, aber wirst sie nicht bekommen

[I drive at walking pace like a Don You’d like to have my rims but won’t get them]

Making this solely about driving at walking pace would be a bit mean but there’s a part in the song soon after about looking beautiful in a Mercedes, so that’s pretty much George. The song just carries that fun vibe and the subtle (not really) flex, which makes it great to listen to if you want to get in a happier mood. It’s a song about Mercedes rims, of course I had to choose George 😔

Nicholas - Standard (KitschKrieg, SFR, Trettmann, Gzuz, Gringo, Ufo361)

Treff' mich in Miami, fliege nur noch First-Class Nur noch unterwegs, kriege Heimweh

[Meet me in Miami, only flying first class anymore Only on the road anymore, getting homesick]

More ~rich boy vibes~ and a song that has been playing what feels like 24/7 on MTV Germany the last two years. It got so bad that some people around me still reply in the trademark Gzuz voice when someone uses the word “standard”. Anyway, I associate this song with Nicholas because just like KitschKrieg did with their first “own” song, Nicholas has joined the game and left an impression on everyone, in one way or another, and I’m willing to see/hear more of that :)

35 notes · View notes

merakiaes · 4 years

Text

Unexpected, But Loved All The Same - James Conrad

Pairing: James Conrad x reader

Requested: Yes.

Prompts: #7 from the angst-list.

Warnings/notes: Not proofread so apologies in advance for any possible mistakes. I hope you like it, let me know what you think.

Wordcount: 1783

Summary: James comes home from Skull Island and is greeted with a surprise he was not expecting.

Getting a man like James Conrad to settle down was not an easy task. Many women had tried, and failed miserably.

He was simply not the kind of guy to settle down. He never thought about marriage, or having a family. The only thing on his mind was following in his father’s footsteps, to serve as a soldier whether it was in a war or in more private affairs.

He never really returned from the war, even after he resigned, and no one had been able to change his goals in life, until you came along.

Your first meeting took place in Malaysia, at a bar. You were there with your best friend on vacation, and he was there on a mission – one that had gone terribly wrong.

Your friend had run off with some guy she barely even knew, leaving you to drink your depression away all by yourself, and he was shaken up and regretful about the failed mission.

In short, you were both in dire need of a warm body to hold, and you ended up spending the entire night with each other. You were both heavily intoxicated, but that didn’t make it any less meaningful – for the both of you.

You didn’t think much about it back then. Not at all, actually, as you simply slipped out of his room when he was sleeping early the next morning and he went about his life like nothing had happened.

But then you ran into each other again. Once again, after your friend had left you alone for a man on what was supposed to be a girl’s trip, and James had come back from a job.

You ended up spending another night together, this time in your room, and much to your surprise, he was still there when you woke up, lying beside you flat on his back and staring into the ceiling.

You didn’t really know how it happened, but you just… stuck together, getting married, rather spontaneously, during a trip to Las Vegas and moving in together and settling down.

He put his old life behind him and you dropped your so-called best friend, finally realizing how badly she had neglected you and what a bad person she was when she tried moving in on James, who sternly turned her down and came right to you despite her pleas not to tell you.

You lived a pretty basic life. You worked as a nurse at the local hospital and James kept taking on fairly safe jobs every once in a while to make it all go around.

You didn’t like it, not one bit, but you couldn’t control him, and at the end of the day, you knew he could hold his own, and he was only gone short periods of time at a time, so you were never too worried.

He always returned to you when he said he would. All of the times but this one, that is.

He had been gone for a job in Saigon for four weeks now and he was supposed to come home tonight, but when you were standing in the kitchen preparing dinner for his homecoming, you got a call from him, telling you that he had been offered a lot of money to go on another mission and that he would be gone three more weeks.

You would’ve been okay with it any other time, but not now. Not when you had found out that you were pregnant the day before, which you were planning to tell him over dinner.

Now you were forced to wait for three entire weeks to tell him, and while you wouldn’t have been too worried in any other case, you were worrying for two now.

You were worried that something was going to go wrong and that your unborn son or daughter would never get to meet their father, and also that you were going to be forced to raise him or her on your own.

You had no living family left and neither did he. Without him, you would be all on your own, and now that you were controlled by pregnancy hormones, that thought literally never left your mind.

The only thing that momentarily took your mind off of it was to distract yourself by preparing for the baby’s arrival, even though you had seven months left until your due date.

So soon enough, your entire house was littered with baby stuff. Clothes, toys, blankets, diapers, pacifiers, everything you would be needing.

You did a decent job putting it all away so that the house didn’t look like a pigsty, and also because a part of you feared that James would spot something upon arriving back home and that it would give it up.

You wanted to tell him yourself, face to face.

What you didn’t think about, however, was that the crib you had assembled in your bedroom was still on full display, obviously, as you weren’t able to hide it.

You were completely oblivious to it, carelessly humming along to the music playing from the record player in the living room where you were sitting on the bedroom floor, folding baby clothes into a drawer you had cleared out to make room.

You were so distracted that you completely missed the sound of the front door opening and closing, and the volume of the music entirely drowned out the sound of your name being called from the hallway, too.

Not until James was standing right in the doorway, asking you: “Are you having a party?”, did you finally notice him, jumping with a surprised yell leaving your lips and whipping your head around to face him.

Your eyes met his and he pushed himself off the doorframe at that, chuckling in amusement as he approached you.

“Sorry, darling. I didn’t mean to startle you.” He said, and you quickly scrambled to your feet, your foot discretely kicking the rest of the unfolded baby clothes under the drawer.

“I didn’t hear you come in.” You said and, again, he chuckled.

“Clearly.” He replied, finally reaching you and wasting no time in taking you into his arms. “Hi.” He mumbled as he looked down at you, and you smiled, wrapping your arms around his neck and bringing your face close to his.

“Hi.” You whispered back, the two of you leaning in to kiss.

Before you could meet each other in the middle, however, he stopped himself, his eyes narrowing slightly. “There’s something different about you.” He pointed out, and your heart instantly dropped in your chest, your mouth turning dry.

“Is there?” You asked, forcing yourself to smile and not make it too obvious that you were lying.

He hummed in return, inspecting your face. “Did you get a haircut?” He asked, and you wasted no time in nodding.

“I did, yeah.” You confirmed, the words slipping out easily as it was, in fact, the truth.

His lips pulled into a smile again at that. “Ah, well, that’s probably it, then.” He agreed, and moved in to kiss you again.

This time, you successfully met each other in the middle, your lips pressing together, and you smiled into it, your eyes fluttering shut.

James was about to close his eyes, as well, but just as they were shutting, he spotted something behind you; something that made him pull away quicker than you’d ever seen him move before.

You let out a small sound of surprise at the sudden movement, and your eyes opened wide when you saw his eyes, sparkling with disbelief, knowing already what they were looking at.

"There's a... crib." He struggled to get out, and you nodded, pulling a hand over your face.

"Yeah." You sighed, slowly stepping up to his side to watch it with him.

He took a moment to collect himself, his arms crossing over his chest and his hand moving up to his face, where he pulled it over his mouth and chin, taking a deep breath before asking, “How far along are you?”

You swallowed, averting your gaze as his eyes met yours for a brief moment. “Two months.” You replied quietly, and your words caused him to draw in another breath.

“So either you got together with someone else right after I left, or you-“

“James.” You quickly interrupted him with a glare, looking back up at him. “The baby. It’s yours.” You told him sternly and clearly, and watched as his head nodded and his jaw tensed.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” He asked, and this time it was your turn to sigh.

“It didn’t seem like appropriate news to deliver over the phone.” You confessed. “And I didn’t want you to be distracted, because I know you would be.”

He pulled his hand over his mouth again, having to take another moment.

“Are you keeping it?” He asked after a moment of silence, and at that, you could only scoff and cross your arms over your chest, a glare once again rising to your face.

“Well, obviously.” You deadpanned, and his face instantly fell, his eyes becoming regretful.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it like that.”

“Yeah, you did.” You quickly answered, and he shook his head softly.

“No, I promise you, I didn’t.” He repeated, slowly stepping up to you and gingerly taking your upper arms in his hands.

You glanced down at his hands, your face softening as you looked back up at him. “So you’re not mad?” You mumbled, and again, he shook his head, his lips pulling into a gentle smile.

“No, this just wasn’t what I was expecting to be greeted with when coming back home. I’m a bit surprised, is all.” He told you.

“Are you sure that’s all?” You asked back, still doubtful, and he gave you a nod.

“Yes, I’m sure.”

This time, you took his word for it, lowering your gaze and slowly beginning to calm down, especially so when he brought his hand up to your face to catch your chin between his fingers and make you look at him again.

“I love you.” He told you sincerely, keeping one hand on your cheek and moving the other down to your stomach. “And I’m going to love him, too.”

At the sound of his words, your eyebrows shot up in surprise. “Him?” You asked, the corners of your lips twitching upward.

But he said nothing else, simply connecting his lips to yours and pulling you close, showing you that he had, truly, meant what he said.

All of it might have been unexpected, but you knew that the life you had created together would be loved all the same despite it.

(If you want to be tagged for James Conrad stories, let me know in a comment, ask or private message)

#james conrad #james conrad x reader #james conrad imagine #reg slivko #reg slivko x reader #reg slivko imagine #slivko #slivko x reader #kong skull island #tom hiddleston #tom hiddleston imagine #tom hiddleston x reader

234 notes · View notes

mentalpolaroids · 3 years

Text

GH | 28. Not Official

GH 27 GH 29

I was sitting on the balcony appreciating the last minutes of golden hour. It had been three days since Rudy and I kissed and, even though we hadn't talked about it, we were both aware that there was undeniably something between us. Something that went beyond a special friendship. But we were taking things slow, see where it lead us and just enjoying the moments with each other. Our fellow roommates had noticed our proximity and took every oportunity to point it out and make a joke about it, but I knew they were happy and rooting for us. I had caught them several times watching us with a tender smile on their faces when Rudy and I were either goofing around or cuddling on the couch when we all watched movies after dinner. They also made it clear on social media. But there was another potential couple in the house, so the teasing from Drew and Austin was split between Rudy and I and Chase and Madelyn, which made me feel relieved for escaping the spotlight for a while. Maddie joined me on the balcony, taking a seat on the chair next to mine. She groaned and I looked at her questioningly. "It's so quiet out here. Those boys can be really exhausting sometimes." I laughed, agreeing with her. "Yeah, there's times where I really can't stand that much testosterone." "For real!", she laughed. We stood in silence for a few minutes, enjoying the light breeze and the last rays of the sun, that was beginning to set. The boys could be heard from inside, doing God knows what, and it brought me a sense of comfort. Being with them felt like home. I wasn't close to my family, barely spoke to them, so I really appreciated the company of these people. They really felt like family to me, that's why I was so stoked when I was invited to quarantine with them. "So, any progress on Kudy?", Maddie asked, wiggling her eyebrows. I blushed immediately, remembering our makeout session a few days ago and that was enough of an answer to her question. "Oh shoot there is progress, isn't it?" "Maybe." "Sis, spill." I took a glance behind me to make sure no one could hear us. "We kissed." She gasped and started banging her hand on her leg in excitement, making me laugh at her reaction. "Ok I actually suspected that something like that might've happened because of how closer you two have gotten but I didn't want to say anything because I assumed that you would tell me if something happened." "I thought about telling you but I didn't want to make such a big deal out of it. I mean, we're not official yet, we're taking things slow, so, you know, I don't want to think way to ahead." "You said 'yet'." "What?" "You said you're not official yet, that means you want it to be official, right?" "I mean, yeah, but I also said that we're taking things slow. So I don't intend on acting like we're a thing." "Honey, you already do." "Your point?" We both laughed. I also asked Maddie about her and Chase and she ended up confessing that she liked him, to which, obviously, I wasn't surprised. I really wanted them to be together, I was sure they were made for each other and that's rare to find, so I was strongly rooting for them. Our conversation was interrupted by the boys stepping outside and joining us on the balcony. The six of us watched the sunset together, talking and laughing and enjoying the moment. My thoughts were drifting again to my family and how I never had this with them. They never supported my life choices and all family dinners were like a roasting session about my goals and dreams. I don't think they noticed how much their words affected me growing up and I couldn't wait to be old enough to get my own place and build my life away from their negativity. Moving to LA was a fresh start and I was forever grateful from what I achieved so far, and one of the best things that happened to me was working on the OBX show and meet the people I now considered my real family. I was taken away from my thoughts by Rudy, who sat on the floor in between my legs. He was leaning his head back, looking up at me. I smiled at his adorable face and caressed his cheek with my hand, the other one going to his hair, massaging his scalp. "Watcha thinking about?", he asked, his eyes closed, enjoying my little massages. "Nothing special.", I smiled reassurancely, pretending he could see it. The others were too busy to notice our exchange of lovey dovey looks, which was kind of embarrassing if you ask me, but, it was Rudy, I didn't really care how ridiculous we looked.

________________________________

kellyinwinterland

Liked by madelyncline, rudeth and 13,997 others kellyinwinterland I want to marry golden hour ☀📸 @madelyncline (who's such a good photography student and will take my spot one day)

user OK SERVE madelyncline MY BEST FRIEND YALL, MY BEST FRIEND RIGHT HERE 😍🔥❤ -kellyinwinterland @madelyncline I love you betch ❤ user1 stunning obx You invented golden hour. You OWN golden hour -kellyinwinterland @obx 🥺🥺💕 rudeth yo 😍 -kellyinwinterland @rudeth 😳❤ madisonbaileybabe Passed out 🔥🔥 -kellyinwinterland @madisonbaileybabe I MISS YOU BAILEY BABE -madisonbaileybabe @kellyinwinterland I MISS YOU KELLY BABY madisonbaileybabe Rudy just put a ring on it already -rudeth @madisonbaileybabe Well that's fast -madisonbaileybabe @rudeth waited long enough user2 MADISON KNOWS WHAT SHES TALKING ABOUT user3 RUDY LISTEN TO MADI user4 KUDY OWNS MY HEART AND ITS NOT EVEN CONFIRMED

#rudypankow #rudy pankow #outerbanks #outer banks #obx #netflix #rudypankowfanfiction #rudy pankow fanfiction #fanfiction #socialmedia #social media #social media imagine

17 notes · View notes

legionofpotatoes · 3 years

Text

alright here’s ma thoughts on that flick I mentioned

we hatewatched a*my of the dead because we were CONVINCED “zombies in las vegas” would be an impossible concept to screw up, but in so assuming we obviously invoked a holy wager with the universe and got reminded, once again, that hoping for improvement from someone who’s dependably put out bad art is never a wise choice 😐

but we were honestly kinda roped in by the marketing??? and expected a goofy fast-paced flick with the odd traditional undead metaphor thrown in, framing some sort of relationship drama maybe or hell even nothing at all! we’d have taken pure indulgent storytelling, idk italian job with zombies in las vegas, I don’t know fucking anything but??? whatever this was???? spoilers below for it is time for One Of My Rants

I mean the main reason I really want to write all this and complain. this film here probably has the most unappealing cinematography I have ever experienced in my life and that is saying something. who the fuck signed off on that CONSTANT shallow-ass depth of field that imprisons your eyeline and turns every shot into bokeh paste???? and I mean every shot almost!!!! I promise if you think I am overreacting just throw a dart at the seek bar and watch twenty seconds from wherever it lands. it is horrifying to look at. at least it gave my girlfriend a good visual shorthand for what it’s like when I lose my glasses

why was sean spicer in this movie. did they pay him to be here. was sean spicer paid hollywood money for his scene in this film because fuck everyone who was involved in that decision

the legitimately baffling hints at the extraterrestrial origins of the infection that went absolutely nowhere and had no dramatic or plot-level bearing. we love to see the franchise sprouts fellas

yet another big budget waste of everything hiroyuki sanada has to offer. and bautista too I guess? I like him but man was this an odd career move

what was the crux of his conflict/resolution with his daughter btw. I understand it was rooted in miscommunication over their forms of grief irt mom but uhh… it was all rather clunky and didn’t land for me. I tried I really tried to buy in but something was wrong fundamentally with the groundwork there, it did not click and their catharsis felt unearned. I know there’s massive amounts of tragic baggage being projected there from the author so I’m not slapping any judgment down really;

but again it would be an easy thing to wave off if they just had a vibrant cast of lovable simpletons with good chemistry and the kinetic sense of plotting the trailers promised (and this premise never discounts good drama, either). but instead it was just two and a half (!) hours of meandering into situations the filmmaking instincts had no idea how to flow in and out of

to wit. I know talking about “bad pacing” is associated with armchair bullshit but consider the example of the scene were dieter does an out of nowhere little dance after childishly screaming but then still-killing a zombie, with the film framing this as a micro character triumph, and not a second later the bg soundtrack instantly fades into an orchestral score dramatizing a nearby mcguffin reveal, completely 180 degreeing the tone without a semblance of deft insert shot stitching or even I dont know a fucking jump cut maybe. now imagine this whiplash for 2.5 hrs uninterrupted

I will keep complaining about the length yeah because this was not a story requiring this much real estate to be told. Uhh in my humble and personal opinion, of course

[man sees zombie tiger] “this is crossing the line!” you can in fact write dialogue that is not utter nonsense that falls apart once you drill down its single fickle layer of referential meta winking. what line are you talking about. you have rules in this insane situation you’re in? total nitpick moment I know but it got burned in my brain for some reason. like a microcosm of the mismanaged dramatic instincts paired with weird writing that dots this movie. I am sure the director calls this either satire or genre deconstruction. I am SO sure

tumblr domino meme that goes from “dude getting sucked off while driving” to “entire las vegas literally nuked”

tig notaro is always great to see but once you know she’s been filmed as a separate greenscreen plate months after photography wrapped - cause she had to apparently replace some abusive asshole but that’s a whole other pig not worth fucking - it becomes impossible to unsee her odd detachment from everyone else in the movie lmao. it doesn’t really “ruin” anything on its lonesome but it is hard to unsee

why. was. sean. spicer. in. this. movie

a very simple key ingredient missing from fully turning lip service sympathy for main uruk hai dude into actual empathy that would generate meaningful conflict with hero family would be to spend a bit more time articulating what he internally wanted the most. because he was obviously trying to do something here with pointed agenda. a family, to have kids, build a caste system, save his wife’s head, return to his planet??? all of these could represent the bigger context in his psychology that spurred his vengeance but none of them are dramatically emphasized long enough for you to cheer him on. I’m not asking too much I promise. Articulating interiority of a mute character is pretty doable with deft cinema language, just gotta linger and hold a shot here and there for a few seconds, frame as his POV, donezo. I know this is also one of those like. “who cares” moments but the movie does, very evidently so, in making this guy an actual character. you can kinda piece it together and create a framework of sympathy for him, sure, but then again he ultimately becomes a foil to be killed and not defeated, so. Ehh whatever

quarantine zone stuff was not a wildly childish covid allegory quarantine zone stuff was not a wildly childish covid allegory quarantine zone stuff was n

the rooftop helicopter fakout at the end was such an ass-backwards, manufactured moment of what could be a simple setup/payoff it just pissed me off??? you gain nothing by giving sad dad five seconds of pointless crisis that flips right back to previous status quo ANYWAY, except for a weaksauce waste of runtime, which could be used instead to get inside notaro’s head and actually SHOW the remorse form as she took off, literally maybe even a frown playing on her face as she’s headed for safety right before we cut back to drax and the kid. just a simple-ass, minimal, momentary setup for what is the most basic filmmaking trick of creating macro catharsis moments. Just???? g o d if you can’t even land that shit why are you even doing any of this

that lil run final pam did was very very charming and super choreographed in a way that was the tiiiniest bit overdone

the whole intro with the simul-backstories and posing with family photos was just… oddly motivated. what was the goal? “here’s what we’re fighting for” vignettes? why? it’s not a functional setup in that vein. what was all that

also I am sorry if this is insensitive but the reasons most characters end up articulating to justify going back into the hell that destroyed their lives makes them sound seriously insane

I dont like complaining about CGI (honestly) but so much of it in modern movies can achieve higher fidelity if the animation is simply subdued. Do not overengineer and over-apply 2D cell methodologies and kinematics to each tiny twitch and movement in a hyper 3D model and I promise you. it will look a thousand times more natural. look at thanos in those last two movies. your rendering and detail are absolutely perfect with the tiger you just have to let stuff sit instead of constantly simulating swaying hair strands and firing off all facial muscles at once. great moment at one point where makeup zombie horse and CG zombie tiger are both in one shot together and just by unnecessary amounts of movement alone you can tell who doesn’t belong. again; detail, rendering, compositing, lighting, all picture-perfect; but y’all just gotta let the animation breathe sometimes, and chill it out

plot holes don’t really matter to me but it was kinda funny how lilly decided not to mention the enormous wrinkle in intel pertaining to an actual territorial tribe of intelligent zombies that require human offerings to let you pass, just so that reveal could play out in real time through the joyous punishment of the cartoonishly misogynistic dude

total chad move for mister uruk hai and final pam to rule from a rusted swimming pool complex

the ending with vanderohe oh my god. with the. cash stacks at the airport register. and specifically them working in his favor. that is literally something you do to get arrested under suspicion of theft. it was almost played for laughs and I respect that. coulda been goofier. make these movies goofy ya dorks

anyway, weird, weird movie. bad marketing. message unclear (something something sins of the father???), baffling editing instincts, literal worst-looking cinematography I ever laid eyes upon. Confidently dying on that last hill

#text #long post #aotd spoilers #aotd critical

9 notes · View notes

tanoraqui · 4 years

Text

AU: Hányǐng-jūn

(”Shadowbearing Lord”, translation by @lyratalus)

(see, this is my problem. I decide, “yes, damnit, I AM going to write this longfic!” and then 0.0003 seconds later I’m absolutely swarmed by other plot bunnies.)

anyway, Yiling Patriarch!Lan Wangji but, like...better

Lan Wangji gets out of seclusion and 3 days later takes a mostly sleeping Lan Yuan, a couple days' worth of provisions, and leaves for Yiling. Lan Xichen somehow catches him just outside of Cloud Recesses and LWJ freely admits that he's going to Yiling - the city, not the Burial Mounds themselves - and he's going to raise A-Yuan there and cleanse the Burial Mounds like Wei Wuxian was starting to do with the life he brought back to them

Lan Xichen lets him go, doesn't even bother to play the "shouldn't A-Yuan grow up somewhere healthier and wealthier" card, bc a) cheap shot, b) he knows Wangji has already thought of it (he's right), and c) this is doing NOTHING to convince him that his brother won't commit some sort of passive suicide if he doesn't get to keep that child. God damn, he thought they were over this phase of mourning but Apparently Not

so Lan Wangji gets a house in Yiling, has to deal with 50 tons of gossip - of a new variety; he's used to political gossip and "isn't he hot" gossip but wow he was not prepared for small town "ooh new hot single dad" gossip with a side order of random advice from elderly women about how to care for a six-year-old

(he is, in fact, very grateful for the advice)

(there is no way in hell that Lan Wangji knows how to be the sole provider for a six-year-old)

in the internal war between "do not let A-Yuan out of my sight" and "do not take the vulnerable child to the death mountain", I think the former wins, considering the small child already lived on the death mountain for about a year, and seemed fine except for malnutrition. Which was...well, yes it was a problem with the death mountain, but not directly. Lan Wangji has money and they live in town and commute to the Burial Mounds each day for LWJ to play Cleansing while A-Yuan runs around catching imaginary butterflies or practicing reading; it's fine

...though possibly the nosy grannies convince him to get a babysitter

and maybe to take a break?

oh no i would want so many OCs of just Lan Wangji's neighbors in this

anyway, it doesn't take long for it to become clear that even playing Cleansing all day every day is like being a bird scraping its beak once a millennia on a mountain. Sure it works, technically, but...not really. Frankly, the resentful energy grows back if he stops for a single day. And even Hanguang-jun only has so much power and endurance

he's going to have to handle the resentful energy himself. If he wants to do this, wants to leave some sort of positive legacy for Wei Wuxian, he's going to have to demonically cultivate himself. Siphon the stuff off, and do...something with it. It won't just vanish. Subdue corpses and monsters, probably? Go back to night-hunting?

I dunno how or how fast word gets out, but I guarantee you Jiang Cheng is the first person of note to hear about it and come furiously flying. The fight that follows is raw and possibly literally bloody, and 99.99% about Wei Wuxian (of course.) I think the only reason it stops is that even though they took it outside, A-Yuan wakes up (as does most of the neighborhood) and pokes his head out the window to ask what's going on, and Jiang Cheng puts two and two together with the kid he saw when he visited to disown Wei Wuxian and-

He can't quite bear to destroy something even halfway adjacent to family He wants Wei Wuxian to have a slightly good legacy, too He storms off.

the only reason he doesn't pass Lan Xichen in the air is that they aren't quite coming from the same direction. This night is becoming very long but Lan Wangji is happy to explain himself to his brother: the careful methods he's started to use, never very much resentful energy at once, and the careful checks he has on himself, meditation and Cleansing and purification rituals. Lan Xichen isn't happy, but he has to concede that it all seems sound, and the goal is certainly a righteous one, and...there are worse ways to mourn

so when an emergency sect leader cultivation conference is called, because the news that Hanguang-jun has not only moved to Yiling but started practicing demonic cultivation has spread like wildfire, Lan Xichen calmly stands forward and defends his brother, states that Lan Wangji is working on noble goals with careful precautions and the full support of GusuLan, he can confirm it himself as Sect Leader but of course any who wish are welcome to visit Yiling as well and judge Hanguang-jun's precautions for themselves.

I cannot put in words how close Jiang Cheng comes to punching him in the face

So that’s what happens: people visit, see what careful measures Lan Wangji has in place, and are convinc- ha ha lol no it’s politics. But it works out. i wish I could say that it's some sort of tie between who Jiang Cheng hates most: Wei Wuxian for everything, but particularly for not even bothering to try to make it safe like LWJ clearly is; Lan Wangji for thinking he can just get away with this shit; Lan Xichen for helping him do it; everyone else for going along with it when they couldn't give Wei Wuxian and Jiang Cheng and YunmengJiang a single shred of goodwill; or himself for not standing up for either Wei Wuxian (a la Lan Wangji, however post-mortem)/his brother (like LXC)

but we all know it's nowhere near a tie

so...Lan Wangji doesn't plan to teach Lan Yuan (he's still a Lan! They're both still Lans!) any sort of demonic cultivation, but no matter what he does there's still So Much Dangerous Stuff around here, and they have no backup nearby, and demonic cultivation is just so much easier for those without a well-developed golden core yet -

so he teaches him, you know, some basic chords to make a ghost or corpse go the fuck away

(to start)

UNFORTUNATELY I'm pretty sure the timing is such that the Yi City Affair happened mostly while LWJ was in seclusion? Or at least, the start of it, such that the finding of Xue Yang by the side of the road happened either shortly before or shortly after he got out (and, in this case, went to Yiling)

and they have no reason to visit Yiling, so...all that...plays out. as in canon

no reason to visit Yiling, that is, until Xue Yang is sitting on the floor of the coffin house clutching a bag containing the shards of Xiao Xingchen's soul and feeling something like remorse for the first time in his life and he HATES it, he hates it SO GODDAMN MUCH, he wants to burn everyone who contributed to this to the ground and then torment their ghosts for centuries

so, he might then visit Yiling and the man said to be some sort of inheritor of the Yiling Patriarch's power. He almost certainly tries to play nice and helpless, just a good young man who made bad choices and lost his friend, and Lan Wangji probably tries to give him the benefit of the doubt and...yeah that does not last long.

especially if A-Qing has anything to say mime about it

Xue Yang has a fierce corpse on call and the won't-stay-down attitude of a feral weasel on crack who hates you personally, but Lan Wangji has a the home court advantage, including extensive practice siphoning and applying power from the Burial Mounds, and he's fucking Hanguang-jun.

Result: Lan Sizhui gets a sad fierce corpse uncle and a cheerfully-refusing-to-pass-on ghost-jie

HARD CUT uh...10? Ish? Years later? Wei Wuxian aka Mo Xuanyu is quickly giving up the idea of subtle launching fierce corpses at this hand bc at this point it's either out himself or people die, and the latter is not acceptable. He's just about to whistle them in when a ghost whips in and probably saves someone's life by knocking them out of the way. One of the Lan babies shrieks and hides behind another one - but a third points excitedly to the sky and shouts, "Oh, it's Lan Sizhui! Sizhui, over here!"

and who should descend by sword but one Nice Young Man(TM) with a guqin that he plays while switching effortlessly back and forth between spiritual and resentful energy, which, damn, Wei Wuxian didn't even know that was an option. I mean, it wasn't, for him, but...damn! What a clever kid! Did someone teach him?!

oh yeah, imminent danger of death by angry left hand -

Wei Wuxian does have to openly intervene, or at least, obviously intervene by fierce corpse and shouting some instructions at the kids, and then letting this Sizhui kid take the credit for the fierce corpses and trying to book it but, uh...getting caught. By aforementioned Sizhui kid. Who is polite and formal and, Wei Wuxian points out, extremely un-GusuLan-like, what with the bothering him and also the demonic cultivation. There's probably still the ghost of a teenage girl following them and making rude gestures at Wei Wuxian for insulting her little brother

"That's because I'm from the Yiling branch," Lan Sizhui admits, a little shame-facedly except that it's definitely fake shame.

"Hmm?" says Wei Wuxian, like he knows what that means but is curious for more information (as opposed to have no goddamn idea what that means and desperately wanting more information)

"I, ah, study with Hanying-jun" says Lan Sizhui, who doesn't want to make a big deal out of his parentage.

"Hmm?" says Wei Wuxian, who is fucking Dying here "I thought I might escort you home with me, so you can get properly cleansed after manipulating those corpses. One must be careful, of course." He sighs in a slightly teenagerish way. "It'll take most of a day, probably, after that arm. I try to use only spiritual energy on night hunts, but that was...pretty bad."

Wei Wuxian, internally: okay, CONS: getting spiritually cleaned by Lans, even possibly Cool Lans - ugh, why are Lans always like this. PROS: finding out who the fuck this "Hanying-jun” is, bc...what the fuck. In Yiling? Is he stealing MY schtick?? And I can't just ASK, because clearly this kid expects me to recognize the title, which means Mo Xuanyu would probably recognize the title, and even a Lan who practices some sort of resentful energy manipulation isn't just going to be okay with suddenly meeting the Yiling Patriarch...And i can always run if I have to.

WWX: I mean...okay! I don't have anything else to do!

except they do detour to Dafan Mountain a little because Lan Sizhui wasn't raised quite Lan enough to beat out the rebellious teenager streak and he wants to fight a big monster, and Jiang Cheng nearly fucking draws Zidian on sight bc he really. Hates. The Yiling Lans. And then Lan Wangji shows up just bc he heard about a ruckus and figured it was a good place to find his son

and then goddess statue, Wen Ning, terrible bamboo flute...

it's definitely not 'til after Lan Wangji and Jiang Cheng have started and maybe finished fighting before Wie Wuxian finds out that the mysterious bastard who totally stole his spot as Dark Lord of Yiling is Hanguang-jun

or, you know...different title now

apparently

and then LWJ takes him and orders him bathed and - wait actually if they've developed elaborate formal spiritual purification rituals to balance handing resentful energy, he. he probably does order Wei Wuxian bathed

and then brought to his room

oh wow

beautiful

AND THEN PLOT RESUMES AS NORMAL?!? except possibly several questions of romance and Lan Sizhui's history get cleared up much faster

also Lan Wangji - Hanying-jun - doesn’t have as peerless a reputation to trade on. Public opinion is probably fairly split between camps of, like, “he’s doing a good and noble thing, cleaning the Burial Mounds” vs. “the Lans say it’s okay so it must be, but wow that seems dangerous and/or useless” vs. “demonic cultivation is always eeeevil!” Among cultivators specifically, it’s more the first two, but...performatively more the first, genuinely more the second.

#mdzs #the untamed #lan wangji #lan sizhui #lan xichen #jiang cheng #wei wuxian

109 notes · View notes

gwydionae · 3 years

Text

The One Behind the Curtain

Who is behind the TVA, and what is Renslayer's deal? These are two questions I have seen and heard a lot of people asking before the finale episode, and I, like everyone else, have got some thoughts on both.

Let's start with Renslayer. We know she is working with someone other than Mobius based on the various trophies he doesn't recognize (note: even a variant Mobius would count as "someone other than Mobius" in this case, just to be clear). On top of that, she obviously knows more than the average TVA worker as she knew about them all being variants and that pruned individuals don't actually die. She also didn't seem too surprised at the fact that the Time Keepers were androids and claims she wants to find out who is really behind the TVA. This seems to be genuine. She did state as much to Sylvie, but the fact that she then talked with Miss Minutes alone, asking for the files from the beginning of the TVA in order to protect the people responsible for creating it, is what really implies that this is true. If she did already know their identities, there would be no reason to keep up the act with only Miss Minutes around to hear.

So what is her goal? I don't think she wants to destroy the TVA like Sylvie otherwise she'd actually try and work with her. Instead she is keeping everything running as she's supposed to, claiming the TVA "needs stability" to Hunter B-15. But she wants the answer to who's behind it all for some reason, and my guess is that she's trying to find out the information for someone else, someone she's working for. Perhaps someone who brings her snow globes and pens. If I had to guess, she was sent on this mission by someone who knew of the TVA and wanted to rule in place of whoever is currently running it. Maybe they knew that variants were taken as workers, having her do something to get taken in. And even if she may have forgotten for a time (as Mobius and B-15 forgot their past lives), knowing that everyone is a variant would imply that she knows about her own past now, and she remembers what she's supposed to do. And with all this time having built herself up as a trusted worker, she is now making her move.

Maybe that's even why Sylvie was able to get away from her so easily as a child. Maybe she allowed her to, hoping that Sylvie could be the catalyst to her own plan someday. It could explain why Renslayer seemed so hesitant to send Mobius to Roxxcart to stop Sylvie and the real reason she was kept alive after being caught on Lamentis-1 to instead be executed in front of the Time Keepers, a fact both Sylvie and Loki find strange.

Speaking of Mobius, her conversations with him, especially in episode 4, feel off, and not just because he is starting to have doubts. Her reaction to having him pruned is that of genuine loss, so I believe that she was indeed trying to protect Mobius from finding out the truth, or at least from finding it out in a way that would turn him against her. She asks him about where he would go if he could go anywhere, and he states that he likes being there with her, doing the work. And then when she goes on her speech about how their friendship is uncommon, she focuses in on fighting to keep their relationship, only very quickly at the end adding a line about the importance of the Sacred Timeline. I think this shows that she does genuinely see the two of them as friends and wants him on her side, the Sacred Timeline more of an afterthought. I believe this is the reason that he gets invited to oversee Loki and Sylvie's pruning. I think she wants Sylvie to expose the false Time Keepers, and she wants Mobius to be there to witness it with her so that he can join her in her secret mission, sparing him from whatever fate may befall him otherwise. Mobius finding out the truth from Loki and siding with him, however, puts an end to all of that.

There is also one other character that Renslayer has some interactions with that I find strange - Miss Minutes. First, Miss Minutes is the one to offer up the lie about the void ship when Sylvie says that she has no more need for Renslayer. Renslayer doesn't instantly try to talk her way out of it, but Miss Minutes does, lying and buying them time until the Minutemen arrive. This makes me wonder if Miss Minutes suspects that Renslayer does know of a way to get past the void and didn't want her to be intimidated into giving up such information. After all, it would be strange if the only way to get past Alioth was by going to the void and enchanting him. My second point stems from this, and that's Miss Minutes' reaction to Renslayer asking for all the files on the founding of the TVA after talking with Hunter B-15. She doesn't immediately go to find the files, instead simply stating that it's a "mighty tall order". Renslayer is the top of the TVA workforce food chain - if Miss Minutes is hesitating to give her information, it seems likely that it's because she doesn't trust her. I'll talk about this a bit more later, but this seems to support the idea that Renslayer is hiding something from the TVA itself.

With all that said about Renslayer, let's look at the question of who is behind the TVA. There are two theories that seem the most prevalent: 1.) another version of Loki and 2.) Kang. As Kang has connections to Renslayer in the comics, let's start there. I don't know anything about Kang personally, but I have heard a lot about him from the comic-reading fans watching this show. And, yeah, it does seem like there are a lot of Kang connections, not to mention the fact that he's confirmed the villain of the next Ant-Man movie. So why DON'T I think it's Kang?

Well, for one, all of these connections are things that people who haven't read the comics would never have caught on their own. Had I not heard all the theories about him, I would never be able to look back on the season and notice the solely comic-based breadcrumbs hinting at his inclusion. And that's not good storytelling. Introducing someone as important as him in episode 6 would just be jarring at this point.

But saying all that, I do think all of those tie-ins are there on purpose. I believe that Kang does have a role in the series, but it's less "main villain" and more "ominous shadow", and rather than Kang himself, we will deal with the one living in that shadow. To put it simply, I think that Kang is the one who sent Renslayer to find out who is behind the TVA.

For one, Kang and Renslayer have a relationship in the comics, so it makes sense for them to have a connection here, especially since he's a confirmed upcoming entity in the MCU. For two, he is someone who wants to rule time, so it makes sense that the TVA would be in his way of that. And for three, apparently the big cloud thing, Alioth, in episode 5 actually acts as a sort of obstacle or even rival for Kang in the comics, making its use here as the "guard dog" of the true creators of the TVA feel very symbolic and purposeful, if perhaps severely toned down. So, yeah, I think that Kang wants to overthrow whoever is behind the TVA so he can rule it and therefore bend all of time to his will. So I believe that he does have connections in this series, but I don't think he is currently running the TVA. I also don't think we'd see more than maybe a glimpse of him at the very end, in perhaps a teaser à la Thanos in the first Avengers movie if anything. Instead the focus will be on Renslayer - as it was with Loki in "The Avengers". This would set him up for Ant-Man without actually ruining anything for that movie or making "Loki" a 100% necessary watch beforehand, something I don't think Marvel would want to do with their new TV show format just yet.

The other often theorized secret head of the TVA is a version of Loki. I admittedly cannot wrap my head around how this could work, especially after episode 5. If you want to argue that one similar to President Loki, for example, would probably create the TVA simply because he wants to rule all, then my only response is that we've just seen that. Why have a character like that introduced - and made fun of - right before introducing another one in the finale? How would that be satisfying to see again? Just because he'd be less silly doesn't mean he'd be any more interesting or compelling after seeing President Loki get his hand bitten off by an alligator. So going the "evil" Loki route would seem like a retread.

But going for a more "noble" version doesn't work either. Whoever is behind the TVA clearly wants all Lokis to be alone, not allowing them to ever change to be a good person. You could make the argument that this is because it makes everyone around him better, and such things are needed for the greater good, but then you have Classic Loki's story. He got pruned long after he was supposed to because he dared to want to see Thor again, after he had already served his purpose in the Sacred Timeline. What would the harm be in letting him return after Thor had done what he needed to do? It feels like the person overseeing this timeline is genuinely against Lokis having connections. Why would a "noble" version of Loki do that to other versions of himself even after Thor and the rest of the Avengers have matured to the point of being able to defeat Thanos? It just winds up feeling cruel in that instance, and that doesn't sound "noble" at all. So having a Loki be at the end of all this just doesn't seem to fit, in my opinion.

Ok, so if not Loki or Kang, then who? As I mentioned with Kang, it would be weird to just introduce someone completely new in the very last episode that hasn't even been hinted at yet. So it would have to be someone we've either met or have heard about already. I have seen speculation about Mobius or even Sylvie thrown around, but neither of these would fit what we know of the characters without a huge out-of-left-field twist (or variants of said characters, which I suppose shouldn't be ruled out, but just seems unnecessarily convoluted, but it IS Marvel, so...).

So who's left? There doesn't seem to be a lot of options to fill this role out of the people we've already met. But there IS someone running a lot of things within the TVA that we have seen several times now and I've already noted has acted a little odd. Whether as a joke or not, I have seen others throw out Miss Minutes as a possibility, and I have to say that she is the character I am currently leaning most towards.

Does that mean that I think Miss Minutes created the TVA? No, I don't. But I do think she is currently running it. I believe that someone - possibly the original Time Keepers - created her in order to help them run everything, either in case something happened to them or just simply as an extra hand. From here I believe there are two possibilities. Either the original creators died, and Miss Minutes has dutifully been carrying on their work as she was created to do, or said creators, for one reason or another, decided that the "Sacred Timeline" was a concept they no longer believed in and Miss Minutes - who was programmed specifically to uphold said timeline - decided that the creators needed to be disposed of in order to keep fulfilling her duties. Either way, without them, Miss Minutes would need help to continue her work, and so she would start employing variants for that purpose, all the time keeping up the appearance of "Time Keepers" in a very "Wizard of Oz"/man-behind-the-curtain scenario. This would mean that the identity of the original creators wouldn't be important, because the one stealing the lives of variants and employing them against their will would be Miss Minutes herself. So no one new would have to be introduced at the last minute in order for the audience to feel satisfied with the overthrowing of the TVA, Miss Minutes and Renslayer both having antagonistic parts to play.

I could obviously be very wrong on all of this. Maybe Renslayer herself wants to take over the TVA and Miss Minutes is nothing more than a cute, animated helper. Maybe it is simply another Loki variant heading the TVA. Whatever the outcome, as long as it's pulled off well, I'll be satisfied. But it's fun to theorize and see what does ultimately fit the Sacred MCU Timeline and what winds up just a heartfelt, fanmade variant.

#loki #loki series #loki series spoilers #loki spoilers #mcu loki #loki laufeyson #mcu #spoilers #gwy writes a literal essay #oops i did it again #let's see how long is THIS loki essay...#oh only 3 and a half pages that's nothing XD #nice little mini essay then lol #i just have a lot of thoughts on this show #maybe i'll finally get around to writing up that loki character analysis essay i've been thinking about #...you know a new one to go with the series and not the old one that was for the movies XD #but i tell you what typing this up i came to a whole lot more conclusions about renslayer than i had previously #i tried really hard to condense her stuff buuuuuuut that didn't go so well so sorry for rambling a bit XD #my guess at the end winds up feeling more like a footnote in comparison LOL #oh well

3 notes · View notes

natsukitakama · 4 years

Text

Headcanon : Having a crush on John Constantine

Author note : I didn’t forecast to fall for the blondie hot demonologist but it happen. This headcanon takes place during Legends of tomorrow’s event from season 4 (I didn’t see the movie or the series Constantine my apologize for that)

Maybe I'll make a sequel of this ?

i do not own the gif credit to the owner

Warning : slight mention of NSFW (you can skip it) / Gender neutral

To begin with you didn’t plan to fall for the English demonologist : Sure the man was quite attractive even sensual but he is especially a piece of work. The man is alcoholic, unprofessional, rude, carry-free in short : the very definition of people you should avoid.

Of course you couldn’t forecast he will become like a permanent member of your crew.

First you did everything to not be in the same room as him but clearly the man has decided to take up all the space and since your ship was quite small. Well let’s say you couldn’t make a move without seing him.

The worst was at the morning cause he used to praticable so Naked-yoga or whatever that thing is on the library : your favorite space of the space (won’t be fun). One day you forgot about his habits and went to the library to just chill without the place became a mess like it used to be. Of course John Constantine has to be here stretching himself while being very naked : you never thought you could gasp that loud before this event.

« JONH CONSTANTINE FOR FUCK SAKE WHAT ON EARTH ARE YOU DOING NOW *you turned yourself so you were back to him* » « How does it look like luv ? » « Of course you have to be naked » « part of the process luv »

You swore the man did everything to get you crazy

One day you two were working on some researches for another demon to track : you didn’t why he did this but he put his head on your should while reading some book.

« W-What are you doing ? » « Your shoulder is quite comfy luv’ ».

Another day he used your head as an armrest » or you were reading a book to him he inclined his body very close to yours so you practically felt his warmth around your body : you noted how good he smell despite all cigarettes he used to smoke. But again everything was bothering you at least that what you thought.

Sara had a talk to you : she understood you couldn’t be friends with everyone but try to not eye-killing him everytime you were near to him. It wasn’t good for the moral of the crew

You started to talk to him, like a real conversation : first about superficial things but then you got deeper. You discover a new Constantine, a new man behind the whisky and cigarettes. Turns out he was quite charming.

But it didn’t stop here, you started to find him attractive : not like he wasn’t attractive but you force yourself to no lust on someone you couldn’t bare. His puppy face the way he looked so handsome while smirking or just his hair or maybe it was his beard or his hand and his muscled arme. You watched yourself stare at the man back or face while he was working. The las thing you wanted was him thinking you were some weirdo.

The moment you discovered about your little crush, you couldn’t have some physical contact with him even if it was light touch like his torso against your back when he was reading above your shoulders.

Again it couldn’t be that easy, while you were forcing yourself to not stare at the man or acting awkward around him : your subconscious him had different goals for you. It was like the more you were distant with man while being concises the more you were closed to him while being unconscious.

To be clear you started to dream about him, first it was very cute story like you two get on a date, dancing together and on home’s ride he gave a long kiss. Now you couldn’t fall asleep without having wet dream about the man : it seemed that being kissed hungrily by John Constantine back on the wall, him carrying you easily was a fantasy of yours. One day you even dreamt about your first time together : You were arguing about something quite stupid, you told him he was an idiot while he was staring at you smirking during your whole speech. When you were done he put both of his hand on your cheeks and gave you the most passionate kiss you never had on your life. Yours hands went on his shoulder holding him for dear life while he was holding you against a wall. The kiss became quickly heat, and you were mess, but it didn’t stop the blondie demonologist cause he was kissing your neck, giving you a lot of small peck and small bite. In a betting of eye you were on your underwear just like him, you couldn’t describe his look : this man was incredibly handsome and hot but the look he gave was a huge turn on for you full of lust and passion. Again quickly, you wee both naked on his bed, you were on his lap while the two of you gave to each other. You just could feel it, the way your body was moving against each other as if you were linked and became one human. His hands were on your waist helping you while yours was on his shoulder trying to stabilize yourself, you were sure to never experienced something that powerful before. Your head was posed against his shoulder while all you can do was moan, he was a mess just like you only groaning and holding even closer to his body. Unfortunately, while you were about to have the best come of your life you have to wake up.

That was the begging of the worst struggle of your life, since your dream you couldn’t be near to the man without thinking about your dream and him loving you in every room of the ship. Worst, he couldn’t flirt with you without you being a blush-mess.

You decided to talk to an expert of romantic things, obviously you had a talk with Ray palmer : the sweetheart of the crew, he told you what you already knew, you were in love with the man (of course you didn’t tell him about the identity of your crush but he figured out quickly just by seeing you)

The question was now to know if the man shared the feeling or was even interested by you : getting to know him, you knew he had great taste when it cames to relationship. Without being self-concious, you knew you couldn’t stand against Sara Lance (even if she was with Ava now). There were no way the man was interested by you.

Hell, you even started to get jealous at Gary for sharing a kiss with John Constantine : you will do nothing to have the taste of his lips on yours.

For a couple a days you became more cheerful, the crew was worried about you and so do you. You knew you have to do something about it.

So before doing anything you won’t be able to fix, you decided to talk with Sara since she seemed to be close to him. Of course you didn’t tell her you had a crush on him.

Here is what happened : You were on the library waiting for Sara to come.

« Can I talk to you for a second captain ? »

« Sure Y/N what’s going on ? You seemed upset by something »« Yeah about that I wanted to ask you something, something personal it will help him »

« Alright ask me »

« How did you know you were in love with Ava ? I mean you two were hating each other but at some time you realized how much you cared for her … How did you know ? »

« Wow that a huge question Y/N … I can’t explain it I just felt it the more I talk to her the more I wanted to be closed to her to get to know her. When she wasn’t there I started to miss her… I don’t know if this can help you Y/N cause I think you already know the answer … You’re more afraid about Constantine not sharing your feelings right ? »

« *blush* how did you know that ? » « Please Y/n, it’s not like you weren’t very discreet plus I am your captain my Job is literally to check on you»

« Fair… So… What do you think ? » « about what you and him ? »

« Yeah do you think it’ll work ? Will he even interest on me ? » « I can’t answer but I can tell you that if you don’t go you’ll regret it during your entire life and we’re time-travelers so it’s going to be long »

So you did, after that long talk with Sara you decided to confess to him : she was right no matter how hurt it’ll be if he doesn’t share the feeling at least you’ll know.

His answer was up to him : what would be his answer ?

#john constantine #hellblazer #John Constantine x reader #Hellblazer x reader #Jonh Constantine headcanon #Hellblazer headcanons #John Constantine imagines #John Constantine x you #Hellblazer imagines #Hellblazer x you #legends of tomorrow #Arrow #Legends of tomorrow headcanon #arrow headcanons #dc tv series

70 notes · View notes

mateasha · 3 years

Text

rendevous 18.6y

summary: chikage shows up at the front door of MANKAI after disappearing from the face of the Earth for 3 years. itaru is not happy. fandom: a3 pairing: chikage x itaru word count: 6882 tags: original characters for the sake of plot, friends to strangers to lovers, angst, fluff, flashbacks, mentions of death, bad attempts at action, bad attempts at comedy

chapter 6: confusion

There’s not much to think about this late at night, when he looks up at the ceiling and everything is done for today. His brain feels like TV static— or better yet, the hum of a microwave warming up his frozen pizza. He wishes he could toast it so it’s better quality (as “quality” as a frozen pizza can get) but he wants that pizza now, and fast. At least, that’s what he would do if he was home, but he’s not...

He’s again sleeping in the bed on this slightly cold spring night, which is odd, because he’s in LA, where it’s supposed to be warm. It’s not like he necessarily minds the cold, but he’s just a bit confused. But his brain is telling him to just go to sleep, but his body is still jittering as if he’s being electrocuted.

Which comes up as a problem (obviously, regardless of prior obligation) when it’s 6 fucking am in the morning, and he has a flight to catch at 9.

He gives up, and goes over the list of things that happened yesterday.

He went to the meeting.

They got the deal, which he was surprised about.

He hugged Chikage.

Wait. He hugged Chikage?

He jolts up after remembering what seemed to be a crucial detail on an important day, which he doesn’t understand. Maybe his brain was trying really hard to forget it. (thanks, brain) But unfortunately for him, he remembered that detail. Fuck.

Well, looking back on it he doesn’t think that Chikage particularly disliked it. Chikage just… may or may not have hugged him back for the most awkward 4 seconds of his life. Scratch that, he definitely did, when tracing back the events of this afternoon, which is unexplainably vague to him for some reason. Which he could definitely attribute to his brain starting to re-realize all the events that happened, rolling over in his bed and groaning, before looking to Chikage’s side of the room, which is in a state of a little disarray, which he is a bit out of character for him, who brought basically nothing but what he needed, where at least Itaru brought a couple extra things. Mostly skincare, but Azami would hurt him, and his skin would basically revolt against him.

Itaru gets up, rubbing his eyes a bit, taking one last look at the night city, looking like grids of lights that remind him of pixels on a screen, the streets actually looking a little empty compared to their first day. The window seems a bit cloudy, and he can see his reflection in the glass window, which he observes for a bit, looking at the slight pimple or bump on his jaw, then rubbing over it as if he was fidgeting with it. The moon seems to be coming right through the window, but this time, it’s a new moon that barely has any light shining on it that would reflect, but it feels as if the moonlight is extra piercing. The clouds have seemed to clear the way of the moon from the angle that he’s looking at, like someone shot an arrow through it.

He walks away from the window, getting his glasses from the nightstand, and goes over Chikage’s side of the room. The bed seems freshly made, like something hasn’t settled down on it, with the slight wrinkles in it, which gives it a sense of chaos, like the rest of his side. Should he? He doesn’t, and takes a couple strides over from the foot of Chikage’s bed to the bathroom, checking to see if the light is on. It isn’t.

Where has Chikage gone? Well, fuck if he knows. He doesn’t know shit about where he is. Probably. There’s nothing for him to do in LA, right? Frankly, he doesn’t car— Care? He thinks to himself before finishing the sentence in his mind, which he doesn’t. He is aware of how he cares. Now he’s really glaring at the laptop and the bag that’s still open on the side of his bed. Should he? Maybe. He ends up doing it.

Well, he knows he won’t find anything. Chikage isn’t stupid. Maybe it was foreseeable that he would try snooping around which— wait. The laptop comes back from sleep mode, which is on a browser tab.

Ah. What did he expect?

—

Chikage knows it isn’t good to be out here so late.

But he still is for some reason, which confuses him to no end, when his thoughts have been occupied for so long for no reason.

He shouldn’t be confused.

He knows he shouldn’t be confused, but still is, which he guesses is basically inevitable, and comes with his “humanity” which he wishes he could do away with, but for some reason, no matter how hard he tries to do it he can’t. Maybe in a sick, twisted way, he still wishes to keep his humanity, which he just does not understand about himself. He can’t have it both ways.

But he definitely knows why he’s in such “emotional turmoil”, if that’s what you can call it.

Itaru hugged him.

And if he’s being honest, it’s the warmest hug he’s felt since— Yeah. He can still feel the phantom pressure caused by Itaru’s arms which he’s basically just berating himself for in his mind that’s only a bit cloudy from the grogginess that you get from staying up till 3 am, which he didn’t even know it was till he checked his watch.

He feels lost in time, in a vague area as he looks out on the pool that ripples in the wind against the fluorescent lights that seem to light up the bottom and top of the pool, with circular lights lining it. No one is here— just how he likes it— and the staff have seemed to call take a rest for the night. Which is understandable, of course. But it’s good. To have no one here. The wind feels like it’s howling at him, even when the leaves on the trees aren’t rustling in the early spring breeze that still has the bite of cold from the winter, with only just a slight movement as the air isn’t completely stale here. It still feels like it is though, with some of the air pollution, but what does he expect— it’s a large city.

And now he needs to think, when he can’t distract himself from the scenery anymore. Think about specifically the events of this afternoon.

Itaru hugged him.

There’s not much to say other than that. Well, he hugged him, and then broke away super quickly before saying sorry, quickly packing up before walking out quickly after beckoning to him in a meek voice.

He’s not going to say he didn’t like it though.

He definitely did— he’s not going to lie. But he should. Some people are such good liars that they begin to believe their own lie, which genuinely is what his end goal is— even if he doesn’t state it himself.

Life is so difficult. Too difficult for what it’s worth to him anyways. But for some reason he’s still here. He could’ve just found some place to stay. A coworker. A female coworker, because they always seem to welcome him in. But he didn’t. Why? Why is he so compelled to come back to MANKAI, to come back to Itaru. He shakes off the thought, already heading back inside, setting his mind on the walk back to the hotel room.

—

Itaru isn’t hurt at all, really. It doesn’t matter. It didn’t matter to him in the first place but it still stands— the fact that Chikage is looking for another job isn’t too detached from reality. Chikage doesn’t really have the best relationship with him anymore. Well— they never had the best relationship ever since he came back but that’s beside the point.

Itaru is not hurt.

He refuses to be hurt. I mean, there was no reason to get his hopes up obviously. It’s not like Chikage was going to get up one day and decide magically that he liked him. Right? Well, it seemed like that sometimes when they went to work together this week. Even if it seemed forced.

But it does hurt. It strikes him right in the heart, like he was stabbed with a needle in the heart; nothing too hard to create a health complication, but enough to where it would sting a bit. Itaru definitely can’t sleep. He closes Chikage’s laptop quickly when he hears footsteps that sound as if they would be Chikage’s, and goes back into bed with his phone tucked away. He hears the click of the lock of the door, and the creaking of the door when it opens. It’s Chikage. Probably. It really can’t be anyone else, but he can’t help but open his eyes just a little bit to peek at him.

He’s disheveled. But not particularly hurt, just his hair looks a bit like a bird’s nest, and he’s not wearing his glasses. His eyebags seemed to have gotten bigger, but that might just be a trick of the light, as he comes back into the same dark room. He sighs loudly, ruffling his right hand through his hair slowly, stretching before picking up the laptop and moving it over to the desk.

Itaru is not hurt. Definitely not.

It’s not like he was expecting much from him— it’s Chikage Utsuki for fuck’s sake.

But maybe there was just a little hope.

Just maybe.

Which is just him affirming himself— or trying so hard to convince himself it doesn’t hurt, when it does. He was hoping. Maybe he would stay, or maybe he would have a change of heart, but he obviously got his hopes up. Just like he always has, from highschool to now, when he’s 27 long years old. So why the hell does he still get his hopes up even when he already knows how everything is going to end? Asking the questions he knows the answer to already, but he refuses to answer them in his head, so what was even the point of asking them?

He gets his hopes up because he cares. That’s what he knows.

He cares so much for certain people (like Chikage) that it begins to hurt.

But caring isn’t really a thing he can afford, can he?

—

The drive back home is completely silent, but Chikage isn’t nearly enough of an asshole to just drive off without Itaru, leaving him stranded until he finds a cab. Does he even have the money to pay for a cab to drive him back home?

Never mind that, does he have the money to pay for an Uber to take him home?

Itaru and him step out of the car quickly, to be greeted by Izumi.

“Welcome home, Itaru! Chika—” Chikage quickly walks by Itaru and Izumi, opening the door and taking a brisk walk inside.

“Hey, Director.”

“Have you been.. studying your role?”

“...No.”

“Itaru.” Izumi can already tell something went wrong. “...Let’s head inside. Never mind the role. That doesn’t matter right now.”

“Thanks.” Itaru shoves his hands in his pant pockets, and follows Izumi closely behind. It’s night time on a weekday, so most people are asleep, excluding the people who are basically adults and decide their own bedtime because Sakyo can’t really yell at them, can he? Well, he could, but it’s not like any of them would listen to him. Scratch that, they would. Sakyo is loud and a bit fearsome.

“Take a seat. I have some tea brewing. I was going to head to sleep after I welcomed you two home, but we can talk.” Izumi gets up. “Of course, if you want to talk. Tea?”

“No, no, I can talk. I can go for some tea too.” Itaru laughs. “It wasn’t too bad, if that’s what you’re asking.”

Izumi is in the kitchen when she responds, the stream of tea pouring from the teapot adding a nice bit of white noise to the environment in a relatively silent area. Just what he needed. “It obviously was pretty bad though. Chikage didn’t even say hello. Like, even when he just came here he was at least polite! Not like he needs to be polite with me, but just at least a greeting would be nice. Just… recount the events that happened.”

“Well… First day was fine. Well, relatively fine. I texted you about it anyways.”

“Yeah, I know.” She comes back quickly, holding two mugs, handing one to Itaru. Izumi takes a big whiff of the tea before taking her first sip.

“Second day was the first meeting, which wasn’t too bad, I just fucked up. But for some reason, he consoled me? Which was weird, of course, because he hadn’t treated me like that in a long while, but he consoled because I just couldn’t answer one of the easy questions. So I asked him, are we friends or not because he kept treating me like one.” Izumi nods. “He said no, this is just for work. And of course, reasonably I got mad!”

“Well, you’re definitely right in how you reacted. It is an asshole move of course, but is that it?”

“No. Last meeting which happened on the last day, I hugged him because we made the deal.”

“You hugged him?!”

“Yes, I did, which I do regret, but it’s not like he particularly disliked it, like he didn’t push me away.”

“I see. So why is he so pissed?”

“I don’t know.”

“Well, do you need him out still?”

“It’ll be awkward… but I’ll be fine. I’m used to it by this point.”

—

Walking into the office, there’s not really much of a difference between a week before today, which does make sense, considering that it’s only been a week, but now there’s a framed photo of his daughter on his desk. It’s not very ornately decorated on the outside, but he can see his boss stare into it very softly, before looking up at them, and telling them to sit down. “I saw your report, you two!” Their boss greets them with a wide grin on his face, which just seems a bit brighter than it usually would be.

“Ah, yes.” Chikage starts to respond to him first, a stern look on his face, as he fixes his glasses, pulling them back very confidently in one, deft motion. “Did you need anything explained? Everything is up to your standards, of course, but me and my coworker here would be glad to explain anything that you’re confused by.” Coworker is tinged with a hint of venom, just enough to cause him discomfort, but not so obvious that it notifies everyone else that Chikage does not like him.

“No, no, the report was extremely good! I’m proud of you two. Maybe it could contribute to later pay, haha... “ He tries to lighten the serious mood set by Chikage, who’s obviously a bit irritated at the new mood that’s been set. Chikage and Itaru forcibly laugh, even when they’re far too tired to laugh in the first place, because they’re just so jetlagged from the flight that it hurts. “Anyways, let’s drink! It’s on me! After work! Some bonding would be nice with my two best workers!”

“Oh, yes, definitely!” He gives a smile to him that could fool even him if he wasn’t paying attention.

“Great! Itaru, how about you?”

It’s silent for a bit again, causing him to panic because he isn’t responding to him. “No, no, I’ll be fine. I have… things to attend to.” Itaru does not have anything to attend to. Which was obvious as a blatant lie, as Chikage gives him a look that just screams “that was a terrible lie.”

“Like?” He seems to have bought it, but now he actually has to think of a good excuse, so he compiles a quick mental list to try to pad out the time.

Groceries.

Why does he keep thinking about groceries? He mentally bonks himself on the head to punish himself. “Um… Just things.” Now he’s fucked.

“C’mon! I insist!” His boss gives him a big grin which is unsensible when he’s at work. He wouldn’t doubt him if he said that he loved his job though.

Itaru darts his eyes around the room to try to come up with something, but it’s pretty much obvious that he doesn’t have an excuse, so what even is the point of it?

Itaru is basically trapped. “...Okay, okay, you’ve convinced me. I’ll come.”

“Great!” Itaru has never seen someone so excitable by a small drink outing. “I’ll meet you at the entrance once your shift is over!”

Itaru is not convinced.

—

Ah. He’s here. He’s really here. Sitting here. At the entrance. Next to Chikage. But this time, he doesn’t even try to start a conversation. He just doesn’t understand why his heart is beating so fast next to him. The entrance of the building is a bit too sterile for his liking, with muted greens and oranges that color block the wall, with the same vibes as the office building back in LA, with the generic office plants that don’t take as much maintenance to keep alive, and the weird abstract paintings that look almost like a smattering of paint, which he doesn’t think is so bad, as some people do, but it feels a bit pretentious with the plaques that are plastered onto the bottom of the bigger ones that have the title, the author, and the date it was made.

Not to shit on anyone’s work, of course.

The lounge chairs he’s sitting in at the front entrance are at the weird intersection of uncomfortable and comfortable, where you shift your position every 5 minutes to accommodate your spine, but no matter what you do, you still just can’t find that right position. (without getting into some weird ass one that makes you look like a complete fool) The glass table has slight finger markings, maybe from a child of a coworker, but the janitor comes quickly to wipe it down, with a quick excuse me, making it seem more spotless, with a citrus scent coming to fill his nostrils.

But other than that janitor that came in and is already out like a ninja, there is no one else here, excluding Chikage. The receptionist has already gone home, and the light of the sign that would be over her has already turned off. The office building seems to have gone to sleep.

And onto Chikage. Chikage. What a character, Itaru would call him, neither negative or positive, because of course he still harbors some feelings towards him. Some feelings. Nondescript, but already aware of what he’s getting at. Chikage is dressed in his same salaryman suit, but a different color, still with a bit more wear and tear on it, with some stains on it that aren’t so obvious that you could see them from conversation distance, but based on how close they seem to be sitting (probably like a foot) he can see them on his sleeve. Nothing seems to have frayed though, and it’s still relatively spotless.

Itaru hasn’t studied Chikage like this. Or anyone like this, if he wanted to become more specific than Chikage. His skin seems to be a bit rough with tiny scars on his face that are, of course, too small to be noticed from conversation distance, but if he was close like a lover, it would be obvious. It’s almost like it’s beckoning to be traced over, but he knows he can’t do that. His skin is still spotless though, with basically no acne scars, and his pores so small that if he were to take his skin and use it as a strainer, the liquid coming out would be so smooth that it would rival the clarity of some fancy water.

Time is weird. Time truly is weird, because for a moment, he forgets that he’s been gone for three years, so it makes sense why he’s beginning to pick up on all these details and how they’ve changed over the years, because he means— you eventually do pick up on these.

He’s not fidgeting at all, his hands still deft as ever, but still with the same “problems” as Chikage’s face does: A bit rough with tiny scars. He’s holding a magazine, which Itaru already knows he’s not reading, but just looking at the photos, trying to distract himself from the slightly awkward atmosphere that Itaru and Chikage have created around them, which… may be a little out of character for him, but he doesn’t want to state that.

Itaru takes out his phone because he doesn’t want Chikage to notice that Itaru has been staring at him for a solid 5 minutes at this point, clicking on the KniRoun app that he’s been grinding, his phone muted this time because unfortunately, he does not have his earbuds with him to be able to listen. Gawain greets him with a “Hmph.” and something aloof which would not be out of character for him, and he opens an area and starts playing, which is a period of time which is shortly ended by the laughter of what he assumes to be his boss, and people from the other departments.

“Ah! Itaru! Chikage! My star workers! Are you two ready to go?”

“Ah, yes, of course.” Itaru already has fatigue beginning to take over his voice slowly, which is barely masked by the slight chatter that follows his boss.

Chikage doesn’t have to respond, as he closes the magazine he was reading about home life which— what would he know? And gets up and follows closely behind, Itaru trailing behind. “I already know a good bar that’s in walking distance. We can go. Did you guys take your cars here?”

“I have my own. Itaru took the subway here.”

“Got it.”

—

He definitely was right in saying that it was a pretty quick walk, but god, this bar is a bit too fancy for his taste, with classy decor which makes it feel like a speakeasy, but it’s nice. The alcohol is nice. But he may have drunk too much.

Itaru and Chikage are laughing together, and it almost seems like old times when Chikage mentions something funny and Itaru adds something onto it. They’re talking about the time Misumi got lost with a crow and was thought to be the god of it by the priest for some reason, which everyone doesn’t seem to believe— which, understandable, because Misumi is basically a cryptid in the flesh— and the showing the video of Misumi dancing in the middle of the shrine is basically all they need to prove their point, as well as show an article about the Sankaku Shrine.

“He made that?”

“Technically!” Chikage and Itaru chuckle together. “Everyone in the dorms was looking for him, but my fri…” Chikage stops talking, but Itaru quickly finishes the sentence.

“Our friend Hisoka helped us out with everything.”

The scenery seems a bit blurry, clouds seemingly gathering over his eyes as he tries to take in the bar’s atmosphere once more. It feels comfy somehow, but mostly because it isn’t too loud, and it’s softly lit with an amber glow that gives everything a warmer hue. It’s a little more fancy than he’s used to, but it’s okay, because it’s at that fine intersection of fancy and far too casual for his taste. It’s not quiet, but it’s not too loud, given how small the bar is. He’s not mad at it though. There’s not too many people here, not even full for a work night that closes in the week, and allows people to escape into the weekend, which he’s grateful for— meaning that he doesn’t have to try nearly as hard to be a sociable person.

He’s not technically drunk but he will admit, he’s tipsy, and his eyes are glossed over making them extra shiny, but not to the point where his eyes are red and look like he’s a complete drunk. He doesn’t even like the taste of alcohol, and would much rather prefer a fruity drink, but at the risk of seeming weird to his coworkers, he got some weird craft beer that he can’t even pronounce the name of, and it doesn’t even taste that good. Itaru swears people drink this shit to get drunk.

He’s not particularly against getting drunk though.

It’s a fine escape for a short amount of time, but he would much rather be home playing games.

Itaru is sort of aware of what’s coming out of his mouth, but a conversation about work while drunk would not be the best decision to make, so he’s relatively silent, and pretty good at keeping his mouth shut.

“Hey! Itaru…! Another round?” His boss looks at him and his empty glass with just the ice in it.

“No, no, I’ve had too much alread—”

“Another round! C’mon! It’s on me~! You can’t just pass up some nice beer!”

“...Fine, fine, okay.” He was not aware that he said that, but he said it anyways, which he already knows might fuck him over. This is the last one, and then he’s done.

But onto Chikage, who’s still talking, and already done with his drink, and doesn’t seem nearly as affected as Itaru who’s teetering on the borderline of drunk and tipsy, and so far, it is almost obvious that he is going to be drunk if he drinks this last one. Which he will have to. God, how will he get home, he thinks, interrupted by the next round of drinks served by the waiter. Chikage isn’t even flushed for some reason, which doesn’t exactly aggravate him, but rather confuses him to no end, as this is expected. Someone’s alcohol tolerance doesn’t change just like that, right? His movements are a little less sharp, his tone a little less pointed, and his shoulders relaxing just a bit more than they would usually when he’s sitting down. He doesn’t seem nearly as on guard as he usually is, which is a welcome change, even when he knows him and Chikage won’t be talking.

“Thank you!” His boss passes it around, the chattering still going on, which he comprehends none of, nor does he want to occupy his thoughts with it. It is odd for him to be silent during these times though, so he lets out a little quip in response every now and then, Chikage, for some reason, staring at him but without Itaru’s notice, probably acknowledging that Itaru’s eyes keep drifting back at him. Itaru throws back the last gulp of it back into his throat before standing up, and saying, “Thank you very much for the drinks. However, I must be… uh… going!” He doesn’t even know how he’s gonna get home. He definitely cannot drive in this groggy state— which is more than obvious, even to him, the person who he’s criticizing. Itaru isn’t too drunk, but he’s definitely not sober enough to drive. He’s just… somewhere on that spectrum.

He’s not even sure if he can find his way to the subway though, which might just be a little bit too much of a struggle for him for him to do, so he’s probably just gonna get himself an Uber. He still has to be wary of those, but at least he knows what his ride is now. His boss frowns at the statement, almost giving him puppy eyes. “Ah… what a shame. Maybe next time, hm? This isn’t going to be the last time right?” He wishes it were going to be his last time, but he knows that he’s going to have to do this stuff again. It’s just for the social footing and getting that raise he really wants.

“Definitely.” Itaru slowly gets out of the booth, losing his balance slowly, but obviously, which Chikage notices and gets up to catch him when he finally falls down. Chikage catches him in his arms quickly, able to support his weight, standing him up straight.

“Are you okay? Chikage sometimes actually sounds like he cares, which Itaru doesn’t even know anymore, and the line is even more blurred by the amount of alcohol that’s in his system currently.

“Haha… yeah. I’m okay. Thanks, Utsuki-san.” Itaru’s speech is a little bit more slurred than usual. He slouches back down again. “I’ll call myself a ride.”

“I’m taking you home.” His tone is stern, as if he was going to wag his finger at him.

“What?”

“I’m taking you home.” God, he’s serious.

“No, you aren’t. The hell?” Itaru looks at him in disbelief in his eyes.

Chikage just ends up making the decision for him. “I’ll be taking him home, okay?”

“Ah, Chikage. You’re going as well?” He’s not particularly phased by Chikage leaving, which he wasn't nearly as whiny as he was with Itaru, mostly because he’s probably realized it’s 7 pm, and he needs to get back home.

Chikage quickly makes up an excuse which shows that he isn’t drunk, and also gives him a free pass to get out. “Yes. I’m not feeling particularly well with all this alcohol I’ve consumed, so I hope you understand.” Not like he needs this excuse, he probably could’ve just left and after saying he’s leaving.

“It’s completely understandable!” He’s borderline yelling out the words which he doesn’t need to when this bar is just way too small for that. “I’ll see you guys at work next week, okay?”

“Yes. See you guys.”

He drags Itaru out by the wrist quickly.

“You drank too much.”

“Not really. I just don’t want to be there for too long.”

“Yeah. I know. Let’s go. My car isn’t too far.”

There’s not anything remarkable about the car ride, except for the deathly silence that seems to have taken over the entire car after that “scene” that they created in the bar, which was relatively convincing. Well, it’s not like they were specifically trying to make it convincing, as it was basically just a scene between him and Chikage, which weirdly affected how he perceived Chikage. For some reason, Chikage looks a little mad, or just feels like he’s mad, even with the hardest poker face he’s seen come from someone. Maybe that’s just his face. It doesn’t look like he’s particularly focused on the road, even with the fair share of complications that come from driving.

Itaru’s vision is a little bit clearer, but his brain is a little hazy with the fogginess that comes with alcohol, now just being a tipsy fog rather than an almost-drunk fog that seems to coat his brain in a condensation of water. He’s just a little bit more aware of everything. The highway seems to be getting longer and longer for some reason, even when he is driving oddly fast, even for Chikage. He’s not angry at that, because he does want to get home. He’s tired. But the sun seems to be almost setting, and it feels just a little bit late for it to be setting. The scenery slowly gains more greenery, which is beginning to grow back its leaves for the upcoming summer as they get later and later into the season of spring.

But aside from that, Itaru’s just a little mad.

Not even a little, but maybe just a moderate mad.

He’s pretty mad for multiple reasons, rightfully so. He lists them down for later to tell Izumi.

He does not want to be with Chikage right now.

Chikage forced him into this car.

Chikage said that it was just business, but this is definitely not business.

Itaru breaks the silence. “Why?”

“What?”

“Why are you taking me home?”

“None of your business.”

“Well, it obviously is my business. I’m the one being taken home here.”

Chikage goes silent, no response, which is another reminder of how the trip went. Itaru decides to speak up again. “Are you going to respond?” Chikage seems like he’s thinking, but a little slower because now he’s focusing on driving, as he lifts his foot a little bit off of the gas pedal as they make a right turn to exit out of the highway. The silence in the car is almost suffocating, too thick that it becomes almost tangible for him. He weaves quickly through the roads, and quickly reaches the dorms.

Chikage stops and pulls into the driveway with his rental car. “We’re here. Let’s head inside.” Itaru gets out of the car, just a little bit more heated than usual. The living room is open as Chikage fiddles around with the lock to get in, opening it slowly, and closing it slowly, and they both head quickly to their dorms.

The dorms are quiet again with only a few lights on, but no loud noises, even for a weekend. Nothing is really going on, even for a Friday, when he’d expect it to be just a little bit more loud. They both enter the room, which was practically untouched, except for when he sees his fridge with a note from Banri saying, “I wanted the soda in the fridge. Sorry for taking it, I’ll be sure to pay you back later.” He looks at the little signature in the bottom from Banri, scoffing at it, and then throwing it quickly on the floor.

Itaru is more than just a little bit mad, obviously, when he throws it on the floor with half anger and half carelessness for the cleanliness of the room, but he starts talking, resuming their conversation from where they left off.

“Is everything just business to you? Do I mean nothing? Chikage.” No response from Chikage, who just continues to unpack his little to no luggage quickly. He takes out his laptop, still ignoring Itaru, not even looking at him. He doesn’t even break a frown, a twitch of the face. Just completely neutral. Itaru places his luggage quickly near the desk underneath his loft bed, already procrastinating on unpacking.

Itaru continues on. “Chikage, I missed you. I know I sound fucking insane, but I seriously missed you, Chikage. I missed you so fucking much and I can’t just let you go again, not without hearing you say that you hate me. Enough with that bullshit, ‘it’s just business’ excuse.” Chikage opens his laptop already, and is already typing something up quickly, which only agitates Itaru more and more. He takes a step towards Chikage’s desk, underneath the loft bed. “You didn’t need to be nice to me on the trip. Who the fuck was there to see you be nice? Who was there to see you be caring when you just completely threw me away after you were nice to me. Say it. Say that you hate me.”

Chikage finally responds, almost meekly, but his voice still seems to reverberate around the room with power. “Listen. I don’t… hate you.”

“Then what?” He walks over to Chikage.

Chikage gets up. “I just can’t deal with you. This.”

A switch goes off in Itaru that turns what he means to be a straight question into a one sided yelling match. “Deal with me? What the hell? What the fuck?” He places his fingers on the bridge of his nose in stress. He can already feel the heat of crying reach his eyes slowly, the tears already starting to creep into his vision from the bottom lid.

“I didn’t mean it like that, I—” Chikage is swiftly interrupted by Itaru’s sudden assertiveness.

“You didn’t? You didn’t? Just fucking say it, Chikage! Say that you hate me!” He keeps taking steps forward, the first teardrop falling down his face.

No response.

“Say that you hate me, and then I’ll let you go.” He takes another step forward, more tears streaming down his face.

No response.

“Say that you hate me, and I’ll go away. I’ll stop.” He takes more steps forward, imposing more and more on him while the tears reach his chin and practically drip down, hitting the floor almost theatrically because he didn’t wipe them away.

No response.

“I’ll stop caring so fucking much about how you think about me and how you’re feeling. I’ll stop loving you!”

No response.

The room reaches complete silence, as if you could hear a pin hit the floor. The wind outside is rustling the leaves of the trees oddly loud, and the dorms are quiet too, so he’s sure that the others can hear him through the walls. God, he doesn’t even want to think about the conversation they’re going to have because of this argument.

Itaru and Chikage stand in complete silence, Chikage watching the streams coming out of Itaru’s eyes fall down his face, and Itaru staring back with almost desperate eyes. Chikage seems like he’s in shock as he walks over to the couch quickly putting on his sweater that was draped over it, and walking to the door.

“Wait, Chikage, where the hell are you going?”

No response.

Itaru runs to the open door quickly, seeing Chikage almost run to the driveway, Izumi heading to their dorm, looking back at Chikage run, and looking forward at Itaru.

“Itaru, what happened? Wait. Don’t tell me. Just… tell me what you need right now.”

“We need to reach him. I know where he might be, just… drive me.”

—

When Itaru and Izumi reach the cemetery, the sun’s already down, but there are still slight bits of light popping out of the horizon, tinting the sky a little orange at the bottom, when it’s mostly just night sky already. He can still see though, because the lights that line the walkways of the cemetery are on, but he already knows where he’s going without light.

“Izumi, drop me off.”

“What?”

“You can drop me off here.”

“Okay. Want me to come?”

“No. I’ll be fine.” He wipes away the last of his tears before opening the door and heading out.

The cemetery feels a little odd with the lack of light coming through from the sky, but the little to no moonlight doesn’t supplement the oddity of being here. He already knows where Chikage is. And he’s already found him.

“How’d you know I’d be here?” He doesn’t look back, but just continues to look down at Hisoka’s grave, reading his name over and over again as if he’s trying to memorize it, as if he’s going to forget it the second that he stops looking at it.

Itaru speaks up shakily, trying hard to push the words out. “Intuition.”

“Sorry.”

Itaru continues to walk towards him. Chikage is still looking down at the grave, looking at the bag of marshmallows that he placed down there last time he was here. It almost hurts to stay here for Chikage, with how much emotion it harbors. “Sorry for what? What is there to be sorry for?”

Chikage doesn’t respond to that, but quickly changes the topic. “This is unlike me, Itaru. Just… leave. I’ll be gone soon anyways. I have another assignment anyways.” He sounds melancholy, as if he’s saying farewell again, or like he’s doing to die.

Itaru already feels like he’s going to cry again just standing next to Chikage, looking down at the grave. “I’m not letting you go without a goodbye, Chikage. Just some sort of answer.” Itaru sounds almost desperate for him. “Do you hate me?”

No response, but this time, the silence feels different. It doesn’t feel like the silence that used to distance them, but as if this silence is pulling them together.

“Do you like me?”

Chikage opens his mouth, and closes it again, not knowing what to say. It feels like they’re stuck, unable to speak, until Chikage finally seems to work up the courage to speak. “Listen, Itaru… I just can’t be with you. I can’t be with them. Itaru, I like you. I like you, and I like the others, even if this emotion is irrational. I know that even if we started dating, it wouldn’t work out.” Chikage says it like he’s warning Itaru. “I know it won’t work out. I can’t lose you again. I can’t lose you for real. As long as I know you’re still alive, I’ll be fine. Just being around me is dangerous, and I just can’t lose you. I wouldn’t be able to walk the Earth knowing that I hurt another one of my loved ones. It happened to Hisoka. What if it happens to you? What if it happens to the others?”

“You know I don’t give a shit.”

“What?”

“You know I don’t care if I get hurt, and I don’t care if I die just by sticking around you again. I can’t do this again. I can’t lose you again. I don’t care if I die. I’m not letting you go without a fight. Just stay.”

He takes a breath.

“Just… stay.”

“Listen… Itaru. I think I like you. Not in the friendly way.”

“Then that’s all I need to hear.”

chapter 1 / chapter 2 / chapter 3 / chapter 4 / chapter 5 / chapter 6

#a3 #a3!#a3!chikage #a3!itaru #a3! chikaita #ckit #chikage utsuki #itaru chigasaki #a3 fanfiction #a3! fanfic

5 notes · View notes