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#it felt like forever since this story finally finished
axelthewonderer · 7 months
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SPOILERS FOR BOOK 7 CHAPTER 1
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THE CYCLE IS OVER!
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I mean yeah I get it Alfonse, but damn... that's cold.
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Me trying to resolve the plot
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whatsk-poppinhomies · 4 months
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Pairing : Boyfriend!Kim Seungmin x F!Reader TW : established relationship ; reader and Seungmin have only been dating for like 3 months ; Seungmin is a sweetie ; slight angst but mainly fluff ; Word Count : 1.7k Request : L ☆ : I was wondering if you could pleaseee do something fluff and sweet (just like him) with seungmin idk if you want to throw some angst in there, is up to you. thank u very much. A/N : slowly but surely making my way through requests! I got an offer for a job interview (at the time that I was writing this, I'm sure that I'll post about it before this comes out though) I'm so excited though!!
“I want to take you on a date…” Seungmin muttered through the phone, his voice quiet as if he were trying to hide it from the other guys that he was the sweetest, cutest, softest boyfriend in the whole world. “I’ll pick you up tonight. Make sure you bring a jacket, it’s cold.” He finished the call rather swiftly, and you were used to calls going like this, it made it easier for you, especially since you couldn’t get enough of his voice and your mind would always go fuzzy whenever you listened to him. 
As soon as you were sure that the call had ended and the line was disconnected, you allowed yourself a moment to let out a squeal of excitement, clutching your phone to your chest and jumping around in the center of your apartment. Some people would say that you were overly excited considering he and you had been dating for 3 months already, but you on the other hand found no issue in feeling like every date was like the first date. It just meant that you liked him, and you hoped that he felt the same way. 
///
“Dinner was nice, thank you.” You whispered as you walked beside Seungmin. The sidewalks were busy, lined with other couples who had the same idea. You kept close to him though, your fingers practically brushing along one anothers, but they never latched together. 
“Mmhm…” He hummed back, glancing down at you and then straight forward once again. Sometimes it felt like he was getting tired or bored, but you’d calm that thought just as fast as it appeared, reminding yourself constantly that he chose you, and if he didn’t truly enjoy being with you he could leave whenever he wanted. “Are you cold?” He asked when he felt your body shiver, a particularly strong gust of wind making its way through the fabric of your coat. “We can get hot cocoa?” 
“Mm… I’d like that.” You smiled sweetly up at him, unaware that he had been looking down at you again until your eyes met, and you saw the blush on his cheeks darken, although you were sure he’d blame it on the chill.
Seungmin nodded, leading the way to the cafe, making sure to still stay close to you though as the streets seemed to become more and more crowded. “Do you want to sit inside?” He asked when you both finally got to the small building, which hadn’t been that far, but in the sea of people it seemed to take forever to get there. 
“Yes, please.” Your voice was so soft, he had to lean in closer just to hear you, the proximity had you both heating up and Seungmin quickly pulling away as he obviously tried to hide the smile that was pulling at the corners of his lips. “I can order the drinks while you find a table?” You offered, but he shook his head, sending you a knowing smile.
“I invited you on this date, I’m paying for the drinks. Go find the table.” He motioned towards the empty booth at the back of the cafe, and if there was one thing you knew, it was to not try to argue against him, you’d never win. It wasn’t from personal experience, but the other guys had filled your ears with many stories. So you made your way over, shimmying out of your coat and playing it beside you before sliding into the booth and watching Seungmin make his way up to the counter. 
As he made his way over to the table, you could see that his eyes weren’t on you, not that you minded, you didn’t want him staring at you, but it’s like his focus was on something else completely. When you followed the direction of his gaze, you saw that it was perfectly pointed at a girl at the table that was right beside yours. She was gorgeous, and while you weren’t usually the type to be self conscious, you couldn’t help but feel that way when you looked at her. She was there with her boyfriend, but Seungmin was definitely one of the most attractive guys you had found yourself lucky to date. That and he was an idol, you were sure that if given the opportunity, any woman would jump at the chance to be with him. 
“Be careful… It’s hot…” He said a little too quietly, it was more like a mumble, like his mind was stuck in some faraway land while his body was unfortunately at the table in this cafe with you. It felt like he was uninterested, he might as well just pull out his eyes and place them at the table with the other girl since he couldn’t seem to look away from her. 
“I can go…” You mumbled, your head lowering to try to hide the embarrassment that you knew was clearly written across your face. Truthfully, you didn’t want it to be a suggestion, you wanted to leave. There was no one in their right mind that would enjoy sitting across the table from their significant other who couldn’t keep their eyes off someone else. Maybe this was his way of telling you that he wanted to see other people, he was just doing it in the most literal way possible. 
“Huh?” He slowly turned to look at you, his head tilted to the side and his eyebrow’s furrowing. “Why?” The fact that he could still act so clueless, like he didn’t know the exact reason for you wanting to leave, was just a little bit agitating. “Do you want to go? I can walk you back to your place… I just thought that you’d want to spend a little longer together.” His eyes were now burning into the top of your head that had been lowered with embarrassment. 
“I… I don’t want to spend time with someone who just wants to look at other women.” Your voice was quiet, far too quiet, and you wondered if Seungmin had even heard you over the music that was playing over the speakers. “If that’s what you want to do, fine… But… Don’t invite me out on a date and do it.” You hated how weak you sounded when you called him out, it definitely didn’t sound as strong as you wanted it to. You probably sounded just as pathetic as you felt right now. 
There was a silence that filled the small bubble that seemed to surround the table that you both were sitting at. It was tension filled, and you felt queasy just from being in it a little bit too long. “What are you talking about?” He asked, trying to keep his voice as quiet as yours was, but his worrying had his voice cracking and rising in pitch, causing him to be louder than he wanted to be. “I’m… God, this is stupid…” He muttered, running his hand through his hair as he leaned back in his chair, his head tilted back far enough to stare up at the ceiling. 
“It is stupid…” You agreed, grabbing your coat and folding it over your elbow as you got up from the table, unbothered by the nighttime chill that you knew would be just outside the cafe doors. You were already heated enough, you felt like you were sweating. “Enjoy the rest of your night, Seungmin.” You gave him the parting words, trying to sound unfazed, but the lump in your throat was building and it felt like your air was being choked off. 
Seungmin wasn’t one to make a scene, and that’s the only reason he didn’t get up and grab your hand to pull you back. He wasn’t into PDA, he wasn’t one to really outwardly show his emotions in general, but watching you walk away had him panicking. “Dammit!” He hissed, grabbing both cups of hot cocoa and rushing out the door after you, trying his best not to spill them in the process. “Can you listen to me, please?” 
He had caught up with you, it didn’t even take him long, he was far better at navigating through large groups of people than you were. Sadly, he had caught you at a moment when it had been just long enough for you to have started crying. “I don’t want to hear about how pretty she was. I know how pretty she was. I know that I can’t be her, and I’m sorry. I’m sorry that you have to be seen with me and not someone as gorgeous and perfect as she was.” 
His eyes were blinking rapidly as he stared at you, his mouth agape, sharp breaths coming out in little tufts of smoke in the cold winter air. “Oh… No… No! That’s… You’re wrong.” He said, his head shaking as the words rushed out of his mouth. “I’m stupid… And I didn’t want to tell you because it’s embarrassing… I wanted you to think I was cool and… And I… I was looking because I wanted to know what to do.” Now it was your turn to be confused, your eyebrows lowering as you waited for him to explain further what the hell it was that he meant by that. “I’m not… good. I’m not good at dates, I’m not good at this…” He motioned between the two of you, sighing dejectedly, his entire body seeming to hunch forward with shame. “I just wanted to do it right… I thought if I watched them I could figure out how to make you smile and laugh and be happy the way she was with her boyfriend.” 
“Minnie…” You whispered out the little pet name that always flustered him when you used it, and this time was no different, his cheeks once again turning a light shade of pink when you said it. “You don’t have to study how other couples are on their dates. You don’t have to be like other guys… If I wanted you to be like them, I would just be with them. I like being with you though, because you do make me happy and you make me laugh and you make me smile. You’re perfect… That’s why I was so worried… I don’t want to lose you…” 
“And you won’t… You’re not.” He reassured you quickly, like his entire life depended on those words leaving his mouth and being heard by you. “I’m sorry I made you worry… I’m sorry I was so stupid… Can we continue our date now? I really wanted to spend more time with you… If you’d like. It’s up to you though.” 
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fillinforlater · 5 months
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Friends that can keep a secret
Male Reader x Jo Yuri (ft. two male friends)
Length: 3.500 words
Tags: foursome, gangbang, MMMF, drunk sex, seducing, a faux game of spin the bottle, making out, sharing a girlfriend, rimming, face fucking, double penetration, anal, spanking, rough sex, anal creampie, riding, cowgirl, protection, not_your_girlfriend!Yuri
TW: there are other male OCs in this and you fuck a girl in all her holes, I dunno, if you don't like that, feel free to leave
Inspiration: @breach12 for the request/prompt
(A/N: here is something I promised to write quite a while back. It's finally finished. I changed the prompt quite a bit, but I hope the person who requested it likes it (and y'all too))
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“Should you knock or I knock.”
Daehwi grins and you roll your eyes. He can never make things easy.
“Dude, just fucking knock.”
You and your friends recently finished another semester in college. You really had to think, was it the fifth, the sixth, the—no, it was the sixth. It felt like forever since you enrolled in that university with it’s unimpressive name and even less impressive campus. In the end, you made it through this time without impressive grades or interesting stories, but maybe this is your ideal life.
Calm and uninteresting, at least to others.
Your friends are a bit different. On one hand there is Daehwi, the crazy one. He is like a wild animal, free from every and all constraints but a slave of his desires and instincts. He gets a lot of girls, hookups, relationships, break ups, scandals—nothing ever slows him down. No matter how stupidly crazy his ideas are, they always work out and in the end, even his grades pan out. Daehwi has either figured out how to live a perfect life or he is just insanely lucky.
But he is a good friend in time of need.
On the other hand is Junseo. He is one hell of a cutie-patootie, caring for every one of his friends, colleagues, even profs. No bad word ever comes from his lips and he is always punctual. Literally always. He trades loyalty for loyalty and is the perfect example for genuinity and consistency. It is only fair that he got the most beautiful girl as his girlfriend.
Junseo is a great friend, but sometimes Yuri takes up all his time.
Yuri is the rock star on campus. She can make the entire university fall on their knees by grabbing a mic and singing her heart out. She is talented, smart, gorgeous—the crush of many, until they find another girl to smash. Yuri was never ready for one night stands, and so it was only fitting that Junseo and her fell in love gradually. No hookups, just pure, romantic love.
Love without you. You watched from afar as your best friend fell in love with your crush. That crush on Yuri that everyone has at least once in their campus life, it still lingers in your heart. You have to suppress it almost daily, but it is a tiny stain on your otherwise good life. Suppress it for Junseo, especially today when you get to celebrate another successful semester at his place. 
"Oh hey guys, come in!" Junseo opens the door with a wide grin and a surprising pink hue on his cheeks.
"Yo!” Daehwi shouts until his chest vibrates. “We bought beer, let's celebrate—damn, did you start drinking without us?" Daehwi puts down the two six packs and starts to aggressively pinch Junseo’s cheek. You start to laugh as the two playfully fight like two lion cubs.
“I brought some snacks,” you shout and try to get their attention. Fun is good and all, but you’re still standing outside and the cold air is brushing past your sensitive calves. "I got them for you, but if you don’t move, I’ll eat them all alone."
The three of you finally make your way into the flat and onto the couches. You feel the good vibes radiating throughout the room and it only gets progressively better. The first step to make such a celebration unforgettable is good beer and surprisingly, the cans Daehwi bought (at least you hope that he bought them) are filled with it. You down two of them easily, Daehwi is already on his third while Junseo reaches for a Soju bottle to create an intoxicating mixture. 
“Damn, I didn’t know you got Soju,” Daehwi groans in ecstasy as he takes a swing straight from the green bottle. “Your grades must have been terrible.”
“Nah, it’s not that,” Junseo responds with a pout. “It's because this might be the last time we have a celebration like this.”
“Huh, how so?” you protest and get a handful of crackers into your mouth, not willing to accept that such a well-kept tradition would end tonight, without warning.
“It’s because, next semester, I’m done, so the party is gonna be bigger. And afterwards, with work and all, I don’t know if it will work out like this again.”
“Shit, life is really catching up to us.” Daehwi clicks his tongue and you can already see that his drunk, a bit more melancholic but still wild and direct self appears. After all, he can’t keep himself from downing liquor. 
“If only I knew,” you sigh, angry that you forgot that Junseo was already here when you started to study. He was always ahead and now he will be the first to leave behind college life and become a truly normal person. “I would have brought stuff to make this more memorable.”
Junseo grabs the hem of your shirt and there is this drunk grin on his face as he babbles: “Don’t worry, I have things planned.
“Yuri, dear, you can come in now~”
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Honest to God, you forgot about her for a split second—you will never for the rest of your life. Yuri walks in, the walk of a supermodel. Her high heels clack on the wooden floor, her hips sway in that stupidly short miniskirt, her eyes sparkle when she winks at you. You’re staring everywhere at once, to the point your throat goes dry again and you quickly need another drink. Luckily, Yuri brought more Soju and hands you a bottle.
“Congrats on beating another semester,” she says with a saccharine smile that stuns you, glues you to the couch, all to the amusement of Junseo beside you. “You gonna take it or not?”
“Su-sure, thank you.” Grab the bottle like an idiot and drink from it like one. Daehwi isn’t any better, dry lips stuck to his can while his eyes are glued to Yuri’s back. She makes sure to stick out her ass for him to see the nice curve. The green plaid skirt is barely long enough to hide her cheeks as she kneels next to him, hands on the table, searching for crackers or chips.
“Yuri, you are gorgeous,” Junseo compliments his girlfriend with a wicked grin and Yuri responds with an expression so sly and sexy, you almost drop your bottle and spit out its contents. Those two must have been drinking before Daehwi and you arrived, otherwise they wouldn’t be so bold.
“Damn, what the hell is going on with you two?” Daehwi bluntly asks them, but all he gets are glances from the couple and a confused shrug by you. “I bet you two are drunk already. Better stop now before any accidents happen.”
“There are no accidents tonight,” Junseo says firmly and makes room in the middle of the table for an empty Soju bottle. “No accidents, no boundaries, no questions asked. Do you two understand?”
“Well, that is a question,” you try to respond with wit, but it’s quickly forgotten when Yuri spins the empty bottle.
“Whoever this bottle lands on gets to have a free wish—kinda like truth and dare, except everyone else has to accept the dare and what you want to do to them.” Yuri’s words have your mind rotating faster than the bottle; is she for real? No limits, no boundaries? No one will ask questions? Can you just—go for it? Ask her to love you for this one night—no Junseo, just you?
Your wish fades to black when the bottle stops and points straight at Junseo, who does not hesitate and grabs his girlfriend at the wrist. Blink once, blink twice and she already sits on his lap, right next to you, and he is ready to stick his tongue into her eager mouth.
“My wish is that everyone fucking loosens up and just watches.”
The most tense thriller could not be more engaging for you. To see Junseo fondle Yuri, her tight little body, her covered boobs, her flawless back, down to the edge of her skirt has you sweaty all over. All over, again, he doesn’t stop and goes for that long, blonde hair and combs it back. Yuri moans and her nails dig into the back of the couch. Then they go back to making out, provocatively loud and Yuri’s top almost slips over her boobs.
You’re not the only one starring. Daehwi gets into position behind them, and he shamelessly looks under Yuri’s skirt—what he finds must be utterly mind melting, because he quickly grabs the bottle and points it at himself. He clears his throat to get everyone’s attention and for a second, the silence is heavier than a black hole.
“I-it’s my turn.” Daehwi gulps, the couple pants. “Can I pull down your skirt, Yuri?”
“Sure, just let me get up.”
With a final kiss on the cheek, Yuri leaves her boyfriend’s lap and stands in front of the kneeling Daehwi. She reaches for his hands and places them on her hips. This was the final straw, the last chain that held back the savage animal. Daehwi roughly yanks down Yuri’s skirt; with every gasp, more of her lower body is revealed until—nothing but a skimpy thong. You get to see it from behind only for a second, because Daehwi immediately spins Yuri around to knead and lick her cute butt cheeks. 
You’ve only heard stories of Daehwi’s sexcapades, the endless rounds of loud smashing, of groaning, of cumming—you never knew he could become so feral at the touch of two small round buttcheeks. It seems to work however, Yuri is definitely feeling herself, hands in her hair, head thrown back as she moans profanities towards the ceiling.
Suddenly, the head of a bottle crosses your vision. Juseon has the green thing pointed at you, on eye level and you don’t let him even start his sentence before uttering your own wish. It’s a bit desperate, but totally accurate to your situation and pent up feelings.
“Yuri, I—I want to make out with you, o-on my lap!”
“Oh yes, for sure~”
Followed by the still manically kneading Daehwi, Yuri climbs on top of you and goes straight for your mouth. Her tongue, still glazed in liquor and tiny chips particles quickly turns into the most delicious treat you have ever had. Yuri engages the kiss, starts off what could have been an equal dance but she quickly succumbs to your sudden dominance. 
Call it a return to your monkey brain, anything but civilized. You fuck her mouth with your tongue, play with her hair lovingly while tormenting her slender frame with rubs and squeezes. Yuri’s giggles urge you on more, you become bolder, reach into the top of her bra—there is no bra, just bare tits to fondle and knead the way only Daehwi would, though he has transitioned to eating Yuri’s ass, thong pushed to the side. 
You’ve lost sight of Juseon, but who the fuck cares when you can stick your hands down to where the sun doesn’t shine and find Yuri’s pussy. She is laughably wet, her juices dripping on your finger while your teeth move to bite her collarbone. She moans and hugs your body, pressing herself further down your length which has been an issue in the tight confines of your jeans for way too long—
“Yuri,” Juseon suddenly shouts. “I think you’re the last one to make a wish.”
You pull out your fingers from those drenched folds and even Daehwi backs off from the feast that is Yuri’s ass. Everyone listens closely when Yuri finally gets her wish out.
“I want you three boys to finally get your cocks out and fuck them into my tight holes until I can’t walk anymore. Don’t think, just fuck me.
“I’m your semester trophy tonight.”
Juseon suddenly stands next to you, feet in the cushions of his couch and his pants meet them quickly. He whips out his cock and as if her lips were magnetically drawn to it, Yuri starts to kiss and lick over it. From tip to base, she does not leave out one spot. Equally sudden is Daehwi, who’s pants you can’t even see anymore, but his cock is clearly pressed against Yuri’s cheeks and then on the ring in between them.
To your surprise—not that you ever actively thought about it—their cocks are just average in size, maybe even below that. Yours might be bigger, but they get girls and relationships all the time—your thoughts shouldn’t become so weird, especially because you have already pulled out your own dick and begun to stroke it to the hardest it has ever been.
Yuri, while her face is getting fucked slowly, her boyfriend’s cock entering and leaving her lips, gently places an unwrapped condom into your sweaty hands. Good thing that they are prepared, because you of course did not bring something like this to what could’ve been a harmless party.
Harmless college parties? Yeah, no, who are you kidding. Just roll the plastic contraceptive over your hard shaft and then try to find Yuri’s pussy. Those hot folds, they are right there—further down. You rub along her midriff, navel, even her crotch but are unable to find it.
Yuri pops Juseon’s cock from her lips and smiles at you while her hand continues to lazily jerk the throbbing, wet thing. She reaches in between your legs and finds your thing poking her belly. 
“Should I help you?” she asks and you avoid her eyes in embarrassment—only for a second thought. Something draws you to their sparkle, lewd and thrilled, while she tries to adjust on your lap until— 
“Ah, fuck, Daehwi, wait!”
“Wha-what is it?” he asks with a somewhat annoyed growl, hands wrapped around Yuri’s waist, cockhead perfectly aligned with her asshole.
“Give me a second. I want all of you to thrust in me simultaneously. I never felt something like that.
“It’ll be great.”
You gulp when Yuri gets you to the entrance of her light pink cavern. This is it, the moment you’ve been waiting for for a long time—not really waiting, just dreaming of. Luckily, you don’t need to dream anymore and just focus on not exploding the moment you—
“Now, fuck, now.”
The signal sends your hips upwards in a thrust. It’s not a full thrust, only half of your cock fills Yuri’s insides. You couldn’t commit to all of it; you need to flex your thighs to keep yourself from cumming too quickly. Daehwi and Junseo do not seem to care about that: both went all in from the get go, filling Yuri’s mouth and ass to the brim with their dicks and their thrusts don’t stop. 
Daehwi’s rough, feral pumping gapes Yuri’s ass and you feel every second of it. He is on the other side, careless, just like in the stories from the countless one-night stands that loved his enthusiasm. This is not enthusiasm, more unbridled sexual desire. He chases his own orgasm every time her ass meets his crotch.
For Junseo it’s similar. He seems to really enjoy Yuri’s drool running down her chin, sometimes even stopping the thrusts just to spread it all over her face with either his tip or a finger. You totally understand why he indulges in the way Yuri looks, all messy and silly, but you’d love to hear her moan louder—you want to see the strongest kind of bliss on her features.
Instead of your own pleasure, you try to find Yuri’s spots and poke your cock against them purposefully. You’re a lot slower than the other two, but your stamina does not decrease at all. Unlike Daehwi, you don’t need any brakes to catch your breath. You just continue to fuck Yuri in this mesmerizing rhythm that has her humming on her boyfriend’s shaft.
“Is this good, do you feel good?” you ask her in between deep breaths, arms around her torso, while she finds stability on your shoulder again.
“Yesh, yes,” she mumbles as Junseo flops out of her mouth. You see him shaking, losing his mind when she starts to twist his tip with two fingers. “You can go faster, harder—don’t think of me. I’m just the reward.”
“Too bad.” Whisper in her ear. “All I can think about is my reward.”
Yuri’s expression shifts, like she is trying to challenge you, like she doesn’t believe that you really care about her, like she—and then she can only think of Daehwi again, who goes on another rampage in her back entrance, while covering her ass with hard spanks.
A tender pain on your lower lip when she bites it. You halt your thrusts, but Daehwi makes it feel like Yuri bounces and rubs on your entire cock. You hear both the guys scream profanities while your own profanities are stuck, unable to come out because of Yuri’s bite.
“Yuri, babe, I’m—” Junseo can barely stand. “I’m so close.”
“In my mouth?” she asks, cutely-lewdly.
“N-no, I want to… finish on your ass.”
“Great idea.” Yuri jerks his cock harder and starts to stick out her ass which seems to trigger another orgasm. Instead of politely asking, Daehwi just growls like a wolf to the moon and Yuri feels his thick cum flood her rectum. “Yes, fuck! Fill that ass, creampie me!”
Now that wasn’t cute at all. Just lewd. Lewd like her fucking face when Daehwi’s cock loudly pops out and Junseo sprays his cum all over those red buttocks. She looks thoroughly satisfied with all the white on her skin, in her hole—maybe she isn’t thinking yet of the mess on her couch, the carpet or on her clothes. 
“Fuck, guys, that was—
“Why haven’t you finished yet?”
Yuri looks at you, as if she expects you to just burst from the look in her eyes. No, she underestimates you. Your stamina is still going strong and your enjoyment of her cunt hasn’t diminished by a single percent.
“I-I can still keep going!”
“Really? Let’s see about that.”
As if you had fucked a million times already, Yuri’s riding and your upwards fucking synchronizes instantaneously. When she crashes down, all of your cock fills her hole and when she rises, you’re right at her entrance, ready to repeat what can only be described as heaven—an entry to happiness. 
But happiness isn’t a dominant emotion right now, hell, you don’t even want it. You just want Yuri and her snug pussy always around you, hot and milking you with that flawless texture. The pink thing should accept you the entire night and with how eagerly she slams herself down on your manhood, she wants it too. 
Maybe Yuri feels happiness, maybe that is your wishful thinking blurring with her mindless expression, mindless moans, mindless tongue that suddenly searches for yours and you engage in a tornado of kisses that leads to Yuri resigning. Her body is all yours now, yours alone, and she is begging to cum. Trophy this, award that, in the end she has her needs and you will fulfill them.
Hold onto her waist and like in the final battle of a video game, use all your knowledge and skill to stimulate the inside of her pussy. Nothing can stop you, not the cum from her gaping hole that drips on your balls, not her weight laying on top of you, not the shocked gaze of Junseo—he must have never seen his girlfriend get fucked so well.
“Fuck, I’m-I’m,
“I feel so good, don’t stop.”
Yuri’s whine feels like a victory. You know she will climax before you do. This is all you’ve ever wanted. After this, you can let your feelings for her die in peace. But for these last few thrusts, she is all yours. Her entire body and mind is occupied by you, and so you claim her with a gentle kiss and a not-so-gentle flick on her clit.
“Who makes you cum?”
“You! You, you make me—ah!”
That scream is so long, so good; she is so tight, so perfect. Yuri trembles, electric shocks of pleasure surge all across her body. Her cunt is so tight and hot, you don’t feel the condom anymore and release your seed into it with lazy pumps. Yuri mewls when she feels the hot sticky mess which sadly misses her hot, messy holes and instead sticks to your dick.
“Okay, fuck,” Junseo sighs and sinks onto the carpet. “That was hot, that was crazy.”
“I knew you’d like it,” Yuri weakly says, a bright but tired smile on her lips as she looks back to her boyfriend. She turns back to you, face in adorable scrunches “Lemme, uhm… clean up.”
“Oh, yeah.” You quickly try to get your composure, because you’re still balls deep inside her. “Fuck, sorry about that.”
“Don’t apologize.
Junseo can never hear that. He never will. And Daehwi is long asleep. Those following words are just for you.
“That was the best thing ever.”
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putellasawfc · 4 months
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exposed !
jen beattie x arsenal!reader
( a/n: omgggg this has been in the works FOREVER, before jen announced leaving arsenal which i am still not over tbh. but it’s finally here! especially dedicated to @mccabeswife since she requested it ! i hope you enjoy ! )
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another media day at the arsenal training grounds meant a lot of bored footballers sat around waiting for their turn in front of the camera, the current youtube video being filmed was for three pairs only, another one of those ‘guess what the person is saying whilst you wear sound cancelling headphones’ videos that people went crazy over. the lucky girls who had been paired together for said video had been chosen at random, and you had ended up with leah with frida, manu with katie and viv with lotte which meant the rest of you were trying to entertain yourselves elsewhere.
which wasn’t really an issue when you were all shoved into a recreational room with an assortment of snacks, gossip and phones in hand. beth, the self proclaimed quidnunc of the group had been sat in between you and alessia for the last ten minutes, and had yet to stop telling you about the ongoing drama in the west ham team that she had found out about at an event over the weekend. you paid attention for as long as you could, sharing looks with alessia as you both struggled to keep up with the fast paced ramblings coming from the yorkshire woman but beth was none the wiser.
you felt a dip in the sofa to the left of you, the last bit of space being occupied by someone who threw an arm around your shoulder and when you got a whiff of the familiar perfume she sprayed on every morning, you knew exactly who it was.
you turned your head and smiled at the culprit, jen sat sporting her usual messy bun on top of her head and cheeky smile on her face. she pulled you further into her side and gently squeezed your upper arm, “she still talking your ear off?”
you huffed a laugh at that, looking to see if beth had heard but she was still too busy ranting and raving, now focusing her attention on alessia since you were now occupied elsewhere, poor girl.
“something like that.” you hummed, snuggling up to your taller girlfriend who was happy to let you lean on her. “you finished your influencer activities?” you teased, referring to the number of tiktok’s she had forced some of the girls to take part in since they all arrived.
“aye, i get a lot of love and appreciation from the fans for providing them with five star, behind the scenes content i’ll have you know.” she told you, “but yeah. letting steph take over for now, think she’s really getting into those football murder mystery filters.”
you glanced over to where she nodded towards, indeed seeing steph with her phone in her hand obviously recording herself, with kyra and vic sat either side of her laughing at the story that was unfolding on the filter.
“what happens when she steals your tiktok crown?” you asked with a sly smirk, knowing the older woman would have a meltdown if steph’s content starting getting more love than hers.
“don’t jinx it.” she shoved you lightly, “i’d have to post something outrageous to get me my title back. know i have some mugshots of you deep in my camera roll, i’m sure they’d come in handy.”
“you wouldn’t!” you gasped, sitting up slightly in your seat and the scottish woman laughed at your reaction.
you knew she had accumulated a hefty amount of embarrassing pictures of you over the year that you’d been together, ranging from you asleep with your mouth open to you pulling the ugliest faces whilst you awaited the impact of the ball to hit you during games.
“then you better hope steph gets bored quickly.” she shrugged.
you playfully rolled your eyes at that, finally relaxing back down beside her, grabbing ahold of her hand that was hanging over your shoulder, interlocking your fingers as you did.
“you’re so mean to me, sometimes i don’t know why i agreed to be your girlfriend.” you shook your head as if you were disappointed with yourself, trying your best to hold back the smile that was itching to come out.
that didn’t last long though, as only a moment later the defender jumped up from her spot on the sofa and leaned most of her body weight on you, her hands flew to grab either side of your face so she could get a good view of it as she began to lather every inch of your skin in kisses, her lips not leaving one patch of your face untouched. your squealed and thrashed wildly beneath her, your shoulder knocking into beth’s who finally halted in her gossiping at the interruption.
she kept going, stopping for a second to grin at your flushed state. “you fancied me too much to say no to being my girlfriend you goon.” and with that she continued her loving attack on you.
you wriggled around, laughing as you fought for breath and attempted to push her from you but she wasn’t budging.
“jen! stop, i can’t breathe.” you shrieked between giggles, hands gripping at her red jumper, “you’re right! you’re right, please let me go!”
finally deciding you’d had enough, jen let go of you and you caught your breath as you sagged against beth with a hand on your chest. “you could’ve killed me then, i hope you know.”
“so dramatic you are.” she tutted, pulling gently on your arm so that you were sat upright once again. “now gimme a proper one.”
you grinned, and gladly leaned in towards your girlfriend, giving her exactly what she wanted as your lips met halfway and you sunk into the display of affection almost immediately, your lips moving together in unison before you felt a harsh nudge in your side.
you yelped and pulled back, glaring at beth who only looked proud of what she’d done.
“not in front of the children please.”
-
the next day you arrived back at the training grounds, this time with a full day of practice ahead of you rather than a day in front of the cameras which you were very much looking forward to. media day was always fun, especially when you were partnered up with the right person and yesterday you were lucky enough to have gotten cloe as your pal for the day, so you had no complaints.
but you were excited to get back to doing what you loved, especially with an important match ahead of you. you wanted to get your head in the game and make sure you were one hundred percent ready to face the opposing team on sunday.
everything was normal for all of five minutes, you walked in and greeted some of the staff lingering near the entrance before you headed off to the changing rooms so you could change into your training kit, but before you even had chance to push the door open, a body came barrelling into yours, making you stumble on your feet and your arm fly out to steady yourself against the wall.
you looked to the person with furrowed brows, your jaw dropped in shock at the scare you’d just gotten. “christ steph, what’s up with you?”
she looked worried, as her hands gripped onto both of your arms and the aussie looked behind her where leah and lia were approaching, with much calmer demeanours. “i have to tell you something before you find out from someone else, but you have to promise you won’t be mad at me.”
you eyed her warily, your head cocking to the side before you looked over to the two other girls with narrowed eyes. “what is it?”
“no! you have to promise first.”
you rolled your eyes at that, beginning to panic a little as your mind ran wild with possibilities of what information steph could be withholding from you.
“fine, i promise. now tell me.” you told her, not really meaning it, you just needed her to spill the beans before you tired yourself out from overthinking.
“i kind of, may have, accidentally posted a tiktok that had you and jen kissing in the background of it.” she winced, waiting a beat to carry on. “but i promise it was a genuine mistake! if i had known it was in there i would’ve never, ever posted it i know you guys didn’t want your relationship to be public yet, and i am so sorry please don’t be mad at me.”
“what?”
a stupid question, most definitely but it was the only thing that you could manage to say at this moment in time. you didn’t know how to feel or what to say as you processed the information just given to you by steph who was still watching you carefully, as if she was awaiting some kind of wild outburst.
an array of different emotions passed through you simultaneously, you were annoyed at steph for outing your relationship on a platform that spread content like wildfire. no doubt screenshots and recordings of the tiktok had already been shared to the likes of twitter and instagram, posts made that couldn’t be taken back now. how could steph have let that happen? why did she not spot it before she pressed post?
you were also panicking. did jen know? would she be annoyed? would this change things between you? you’d both agreed when you first began dating, after months of mutual pining, that when you got together you would keep your relationship as private as you could, for as long as you could.
something that was unfortunately common amongst women’s football, was how invasive some fans could be in the players lives. you had seen how they could overstep boundaries and pry too deep into stuff they didn’t need to know about many times, which would then jump to them spreading their opinions without a care about who was on the other side of their sometimes vicious comments. you’d been witness to it ruining some of your friends relationships, and you didn’t want that to happen to you and jen. jen who you loved, who loved you back, jen who you could see yourself marrying one day in the future. so you had come to the smart, unanimous decision to keep it hush for as long as you could. but now, it was out there.
“does jen know?” you asked next, deciding that was the priority for you right now.
steph shook her head, “no. i was gonna tell her but she’s been talking to jonas since she got in.”
jen had set off an hour prior to you, with fans sometimes lingering outside the training grounds in hopes of getting a photo with some of you before you came in, you didn’t want to risk them seeing you and jen showing up together a few times too many and start to put two and two together, so more often than not you took separate cars and showed up at different times.
you nodded at that, and took in a deep breathe as you tried to think of what to do next. seeing as it was already out, there was no way you’d be able to backtrack or deny that you were in a relationship with jen, so the only real option you had left was to come clean to the fans about it all. you just weren’t sure how to.
“are you still my friend?” you were brought back into the present by steph’s quiet voice, her eyes were still scanning you warily and you probably would’ve laughed at how silly she sounded if you weren’t the person on the other end.
“course i’m still your mate steph.” you told her, and the blonde visibly deflated in front of you. “just wish you had the common sense to check what’s going on in your tiktok’s before you posted them.”
you were half joking, half serious. but when steph tutted and shoved you playfully, you didn’t have the heart to be upset with her anymore. it’s not as if she had posted it on purpose, and with how she reacted when she approached you, you were sure she’d been beating herself up over it since she’d realised what she’d done.
“see! told you she wouldn’t be mad, got yourself all worked up over nothing.” leah spoke up, and then you remembered her and lia were still lingering in the back.
“yeah well, i wouldn’t have blamed her if she was.” steph said, and you pulled the aussie in for a side hug.
“it’s okay steph, just gotta find jen now and spill the beans.”
-
it was only twenty minutes later when jen joined you all in the changing rooms, already clad in her arsenal training kit and with her water bottle in hand, she spotted you almost instantly and her face brightened when she realised you had arrived whilst she’d been busy.
“when did you get here?” she asked, pulling you into a hug which you gladly reciprocated.
“not too long ago.” you told her, rubbing your hands up and down her back. “got something i need to tell you though.”
she pulled back a little at that, looking down at you with a raised brow. “should i be worried?”
you shrugged, “i mean, it’s not anything to panic about but … i don’t know if you’re going to like it.”
you nodded your head towards the door, gesturing to the empty hallway on the other side where you could both have the conversation privately with nobody there to eavesdrop. jen nodded in agreement, retracting from your embrace and pulling on your hand to tug you in the direction you had just motioned towards.
now standing in the vacant corridor, you leaned your back against the grey wall and watched jen as she stood in front of you with her hands on her hips as she waited for you to speak, which you did after a sigh.
“steph practically ambushed me this morning, she um, did something stupid.” you began, scratching your head as you thought about how to put what happened into words. “you know all those tiktoks she was messing around with yesterday?”
you waited for jen to nod, which she did a second later so then you continued. “well she posted some of them and in one of them, it has you and i kissing in it, in the background. and it’s definitely too late for us to do anything about it.”
you stood with baited breath, similar to how steph had been when she was breaking the news to you, all of a sudden wishing you had the power to read minds as jen’s poker face came out in full force, the brunette not hinting to how she was feeling at all. at least she wasn’t tugging at her loose strands of hair, or biting at her nails, two big tell tale signs that she was stressing which you’d picked up over the months you’d spent together, which was a small win you were willing to take.
“well i guess the secrets out then.” jen shrugged, her hands remaining on her hips as you looked at her slightly puzzled.
“you’re not bothered?” you asked, half expecting a bigger reaction from the woman who was always so careful with how you interacted in public.
“i mean, it’s not great is it?” she asked, “but honestly, a part of me is kind of glad its out there now. i love our little bubble, not having to deal with people we don’t even know deciding whether we’re a good fit or not and all that stuff. but at least now, we don’t have to stress over the littlest things everytime we go out together.”
you listened to the points she made, nodding along with pursed lips in agreement with what she was saying. one of the most annoying things about have a relationship that wasn’t public, was having to be on guard everytime you both wanted to spend time with eachother out of the house, leading to the two of you just ending up having most of your date nights at home instead, not having the energy to make sure there were no prying eyes wherever you went.
“and we don’t have to watch what we post on social media. no more making sure our stories don’t give away that we’re at the same place, or triple checking that none of our stuff’s in the background.” she added on, and your lips quirked up in amusement at the amount of times you’d had to quickly delete a story or instagram post when you realised there was a beattie shirt in the background, or anything else that gave away who you were with.
“so this is kind of like a blessing in disguise?”
she grinned, “yeah something like that. but don’t tell steph i said anything, she’ll be gloating for weeks.”
you laughed at that, finally being able to relax properly for the first time since steph had practically jumped you whilst you were on your way to get changed. jen approached you, clearing the few steps that kept her away from you and pulling you into her warm embrace, pressing a kiss to your forehead as she did. “at least now we don’t have to do any big, relationship reveal post. you know how much i’ve been dreading that.”
you hummed, “think we should get steph to do a big post for us? i’m sure her drafts are stacked with videos of us.”
“we can ask. but not yet, wanna pretend i’m really mad at her for a bit so i can bribe her into pampering me for a bit.”
you scoffed at that, giving the scottish woman a faux disgusted look. “you’re evil beattie.”
“you love me.”
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javierpena-inatacvest · 3 months
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Chapter 20 pt. 1- I Do
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Summary: It's finally here, the day you've been waiting for since the day Javi came into your life and changed it for the better- It's your wedding day, and things couldn't be more perfect. Except for the fact that you and Javi can barley contain your excitement as you wait to see each other.
Word Count: 11.4K (If this wasn't 2 parts, this would be 30k long and wouldn't be finished until May)
Warnings: SMUT (18+) oral (f receiving), vaginal fingering, praise kink, marriage kink (?), kind of semi-public sex (they're gettin' busy in the bathroom), Kind of getting caught (Steve needs to mind his own business), wedding things!!, family dynamics, mentions of death/grief, lots of emotions, Javi being an anxious, blubbering, hot mess, Javi being so in love and is so excited to spend the rest of his life with you that it physically hurts me (this chapter is lots of fluff and feelings and not as much smut, sorry!! Don't worry, there's PLENTY more to come next chapter 🤪)
A/N: Hi friends!!! Well, she's finally here, the moment we've all been waiting for- our two favorite idiots are finally getting married 😭💕 While I would have loved to make this one chapter, it literally would have been SO long, and Lord knows when I actually would have finished with it. So this chapter is the morning leading up to the ceremony, and part 2 will be the ceremony and reception!! I'm not even gonna lie, I bawled several times writing this chapter. These two mean so much to me, and I'm so honored that you care enough about them to be invested in my silly little story, too 🥺 HAPPY WEDDING DAY!!!
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For the better part of his life, Javier Peña was convinced there was nothing more soul-crushingly painful and miserable than a wedding. On a day that was supposed to be filled with happiness and joy, Javi had spent more years than he’d like to admit doing anything to avoid the occasion all together. Because for him, weddings had meant none of those things. Weddings had only served as yet another reminder of the failure he had chalked himself up to be. 
Leaving Lorraine at the altar and running away to Colombia. 
Watching the successes of everyone else’s blissful domestic lives play out in front of him, while he’d never felt so alone. 
Convincing himself that he would never be worthy of love because of the terrible person that he’d become. 
Weddings had been something that Javier Peña hated more than most things in life. 
But that was until he met you. 
Because today, on the morning of his own wedding, Javi was quite literally bursting at the seams with excitement, goofy grin stretched from ear to ear knowing that in a few short hours, he got to marry the most amazing, beautiful, perfect woman he had ever met. And even though the reality had set in that today was finally the day the two of you started your forever together, he was positive that he’d never get over the reality that you would always be his. 
As he pulled his truck up the driveway to your new home where he should have been sleeping for the better half of last night, there was a part of him that couldn’t have been more thankful he had been able to sneak in just a few more hours with you before sunrise, knowing the anxious anticipation of waiting to see you all day, let alone see you in your wedding dress at the other end of the aisle, was enough to already have his heart beating a million miles a minute at the ripe hours of the morning. 
While he should have known better his Dad would already be well awake by the time he snuck back home, Chucho’s welcoming grin from the front porch was already laced with enough forgiveness for Javi to hope he’d be spared at least some shit from his father. 
“”Morning, mijo.” Chucho chuckled, watching Javi’s sheepish stride up the driveway towards the house, slowly sipping on his cup of coffee with a boyish grin on his face, knowing damn well where his son had been without having to say a word. 
“I already know what you’re gonna say, Pops.” Javi sighed, shaking his head in embarrassment as he approached his dad, letting out a soft grunt as he took a seat next to his father on the top step of the front porch. 
“I haven’t said anything, Javier. Do you have something you want to say?” Chucho couldn’t help but snicker, raising his eyebrows at his son, as he watched his cheeks turn a petrified pink. 
“Nope, I am- oh, fuck me- nope I am, uh, all good.” Javi stammered, burying his hands in his face before running them through the sleepy curls of his hair and over the nape of his neck, his eyes still peeled to the ground, avoiding Chucho’s smug grin. 
“Then all I have to say is,” Cucho paused, taking another swig of coffee, “I hope you never stop loving her the way that you do now.” Javi looked up at his dad in confusion, wondering how his sneaking out wasn’t shaping up to be some sort of teenage scolding from his father. “I already know that you know you are a very, very lucky man Javier, but I also hope that you know you are going to make a wonderful husband. Eres un buen hombre. Estoy muy feliz por ti, mijo. Tu madre también lo estaría. Muy feliz.” (You are a good man. I am so happy for you, son. Your mom would be, too. So happy.) 
Letting his eyes shift off his feet where they had been stuck, Javi looked back up at his father, tears welling in his eyes at Chucho’s reassuring smile, reaching out to wrap his arm around his son, pulling him close enough to let Javi’s head fall on his shoulder, the two sitting for a quiet moment in silence. 
Javi couldn’t help but feel a twinge in his heart, thinking about the fact his mom wouldn’t be with him for the biggest day of his life. His mother had left this world when Javi was at his lowest- alone and halfway across the globe, fighting for a cause he wasn’t even sure he believed in. It had always haunted him that his mom had died worried that her son had become a broken man, and would never be proud of the person he’d turned out to be. When he returned home, he felt even worse thinking that his one living parent probably felt that way, too. 
But what brought him solace in a time that he needed it most, was you. You had given him a reason to make his parents proud, to make himself proud. While his mom would never be able to tell him the words he so desperately longed to hear, he knew in his heart that the life he’d built because of you was all the comfort he needed to prove to himself Lucia was smiling down on him when he needed it most. And as he looked up at the sky, the pink and orange rays of the beautiful sunrise beginning to spill over the horizon, he had never been more sure that even though his mom couldn’t physically be by his side, that Lucia Peña would still be with him every step of the way.  
“Fuck, I miss her, Pops. I wish she was here.” 
“She is, Javier. She always will be.” 
After soaking in a few more quiet moments together staring out into the shimmering sunrise, Chucho let out a content sigh, giving Javi a gentle pat on the back and rustling the dark curls of his son’s thick hair. 
“But, if there is one thing I know about your Mother, it’s that  I can practically hear her screeching at us wasting our time being sad about her on the happiest day of your life. Chucho, por qué piedres el tiempo estar triste? Basta de quejarte! Nuestro hijo se está casando, pendejo!” (Why are you wasting your time being sad! Stop moping! Our son is getting married, stupid.) Chucho mocked, shaking his head at the sky at the scolding he knew he’d be getting from his wife, making him and Javi burst into laughter. “And, if there’s another thing I know about your mother,” Chucho paused again, letting out a loud grunt as he pushed himself up to stand, resting his arm on Javi’s shoulder, “it’s that her and I would both agree there better be a nieto (grandchild) in our lives 9 months from now. Dios mío (oh my God), Javier, even on the night before your wedding you two can’t keep your hands to yourselves! I am truly surprised I don’t have 14 grandchildren already.” 
“Jesus fucking Christ, Pops….” Javi whispered to himself over his dad’s schoolgirl snickers, watching his son’s face fall flush once again, standing up to follow behind his dad back inside as Chuhco began to waddle his way across the porch. 
Although Javi could have tried to plead his case to his dad to prove his innocence, truth be told, today, he really didn’t care. Today, the only thing he cared about was that in just a few short hours, he got to meet you, his wife, at the end of the aisle and spend his forever with the woman he loved more than life itself. For the first time in his life, Javier Peña couldn’t have been more excited for a wedding. 
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You weren’t sure how many more times you had read the scratchy print scribbled across the bright yellow post-it Javi had left behind on his pillow before he had snuck out for the morning, but you did know that your heart beat faster and faster in anxious anticipation with every glance over his words, counting down the second until you got to see him again. 
You had kept yourself in your room, convinced that your excited impatience would have you awake well before everyone else still sleeping at the ranch, but as you heard clanging and bickering starting to echo from the kitchen, you should have known better that your mom and Connie would be up to something to kick start your wedding day. 
With a yawn and stretch of your arms above your head, you flopped yourself out of bed, exchanging Javi’s worn t-shirt and sleep shorts for the white pajama set your mom had insisted she buy for you to get ready in as a compromise for your adamant despise at the white silky robe that had “bride” stitched across it in big pink letters that she had begged to buy you. 
Shuffling down the hallway, the commotion in the kitchen only became increasingly louder, now realizing almost everyone must be awake for whatever antics were taking place for the early hours of the morning. As you turned the corner, you were greeted by an adorable “Happy Wedding Day!” banner that had been made by the girls hanging on the wall, decorated with adorable crayon drawings of flowers, you and Javi, and all of the horses of the Peña ranch dressed in wedding apparel. As your eyes scanned across the rest of the room, the kitchen table was already full of breakfast, balloons dangled from the ceiling, and your mom and Connie were actively working on filling up what was most likely one too many glasses of mimosas.  
“Happy wedding day, Auntie Bear!” A little voice cooed behind you, looking down to see a still very sleepy Olivia, hair still crazed and bed ridden as she wrapped herself around your hip, squeezing you in a tight hug. 
“Ahhhhh, there’s the bride!!” Your mom shrieked, her pitch enough to make everyone in the room wince as she barreled towards you, joining Olivia to engulf you in her grasp. After everyone had recovered from your mom’s shrill greeting, everyone else had soon joined in on squeezing you in a giant group hug, the gesture in itself making you smile, but the physical restraint in the middle of a human sandwich being a little too much for you this early in the morning. 
“Thanks guys. I uh, I would like to make it out alive for my wedding so maybe if we don’t squish me to death, that would be great.” You grunted, trying to wriggle out of the arms squishing your body, hoping that someone would get the hint. 
“Alright, I think she’s probably had enough.” Connie laughed, finally noticing the look on your face, prompting everyone to give you at least a little breathing room. 
“I’m just so excited for you! I can’t believe you’re getting married, sweetie!” Your mom, clearly not picking up on the hint, was now back to squeezing you in a bear hug again tight enough to make your eyes pop out of your head. “Okay, sorry, sorry, I’m done now, just had to get one last one out of my system… for now. Here, have a seat, honey,” Your mom gestured towards the kitchen table, pulling out a chair for you to sit in, “we have about an hour before we have to start doing hair and makeup but we have plenty of breakfast for you to choose from before we get the day started. How’d you sleep?” 
“Oh, um- fine, I um, I slept fine.” You lied, now sheepishly staring down at the overflowing plate of breakfast food your mom had set in front of you, taking a hefty bite of pancake before looking back up, your eyes meeting Connie’s, a suspicious smirk gleaming on her face as she stared at you, crossing your arms over your chest as you swallowed your food with a more audible than intended gulp. 
“Oh good!” Your mom replied, obvious to yours and Connie’s silent interaction as she meandered around the kitchen. “Well, eat up, I’m off to go check on some things outside, but by the time I get back in here, that plate better be cleared! Girls, come help Grandma, let your Aunt finish her breakfast!” 
“Okay!” Your nieces giggled, following behind your mom into the backyard, leaving you and Connie alone in the kitchen, hearing her silently laugh to herself as she sat down next to you at the table. 
“Good sleep, huh? Good sleep that definitely had nothing to do with Javi’s truck that left here at 6:00 AM this morning?” Connie snickered, giving you a little wink as your cheeks turned pink with embarrassment, letting out a defeated sigh. 
“I promise it’s not what you think. I actually couldn’t sleep and I called Javi and he ended up coming over so I wouldn’t be up the whole night. I told him he didn’t have to, but I was up and stressed and having him here was the only thing that was going to help. It was just sleep, I promise.” 
“It’s okay, I believe you. I couldn’t sleep the night before my wedding either. I’m pretty sure if I did what you had done, Steve would have slept right through the phone call, or still would have been too drunk to drive over.” The two of you quietly giggled to yourselves as Connie reached out for your hand, holding it in hers, “I hope you know that he loves you so much. It always broke my heart to see Javi go through what he did, and how hard on himself he was because of it. You really are the best thing that could have ever happened to him. I’m so happy for the two of you, I couldn’t be more excited for today, honey.” 
Reaching across the table, Connie wrapped her arms around you, squeezing you in another hug, trying to hold back your sniffles as you felt happy tears beginning to well in your eyes. 
“Thank you, Connie.” 
“Of course. Now, you better pick what you want from that breakfast and throw away the rest before your mom gets back, I don’t think either one of us wants to be responsible for telling her that her food wasn’t sufficient enough for you.” 
You snorted, rolling your eyes at the thought of the dismay your mom would be in thinking that you didn’t get enough to eat before your big day as you put a reasonable amount of breakfast on a new plate to eat, discarding the other heaping pile that your mom had left you. 
“You are a smart woman, Connie Murphy.” 
“So I’ve been told.” 
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The rest of the morning seemed to move by at an exponential pace- At the Pena ranch, hair and makeup was well underway for everyone, and running on time with incredible efficiency from the detailed schedule that your mom and Connie had put together. Even though your body was riddled with endless amounts of anxious anticipation and excitement as the clock ticked closer and closer to when Javi and the rest of the boys would finally get here, you were pleasantly surprised at how fun the morning had ended up being with all the girls, especially since your nieces and the Murphy girls had insisted on putting on a hilarious sing along spectacular for the majority of the time for entertainment while you got ready. 
Over at your new house, however, with the only getting ready that Javi needed to do being taking a shower and putting on his suit, the boys were convinced that he was going to put a hole in the floor from his anxious pacing as he counted down the minutes to leave. 
“Jav, have a beer, man, you just put this floor in, I think your wife’s gonna be pissed when she finds out she has to replace it before y’all even move in because you can’t sit still.” Steve chuckled, taking a sip out of his can before nudging your brothers sitting next to him on the couch as they watched their friend and future brother in law tread back and forth across the living room for what felt like the 117th time since they’d sat down. 
“I think I have to agree with Steve on this one, Javier, you are making me anxious and I’m not even the one getting married.” Chucho chimed in from the armchair seated next to the couch. 
“I’ll second what Steve said, man. Have a beer, Javi. You haven’t shut up all day about how fuckin’ excited you are, so what’s got you so worked up? You’ve seen her in a dress before dude, this one’s just white.” Your brother David snorted, his joke now soliciting some eye rolls from the rest of the boys, considering David was about single as they came, and was the only one of the group who wasn’t even remotely close to being married. 
“It’s a fucking wedding dress, you dingus, there’s obviously a difference.” Your dad groaned, walking up to your brother to give him a prompt smack in the back of the head, making your other brother Charlie snicker to himself, until he also decided to greet him with an equally harsh slap for good measure. 
“What the fuck was that for? I didn’t say anything!” Charlie winced, holding his hands up in defense. 
“Tell your brother to stop being an ass! She’s your sister too, for Christ’s Sake, you’re not gonna stand up for her either?! Jesus you two are the biggest idiots I’ve ever met. Even Patrick would have had enough common sense to keep that one in his head. Well, maybe not, but that’s besides the point.” That one at least cracked a little smile from your brothers, wishing that Patrick would have been here to see their sister’s big day, and to distribute the slapping pain more equally between the pair. 
“I just… Fuck, I just wanna see her. I can’t wait to see her. I’ve never wanted anything so bad in my whole life. The suspense is fucking killing me.” Javi signed, resting one hand on his hip before running his hand through his hair, anxiously drumming his fingers on his side, foot tapping on the well worn path he had been treading on the hardwood floor of the living room. 
Chucho chuckled, resting his hands on his knees and pushing himself up to stand with a low grunt, making his way over to his son, resting his hand on his shoulder as he looked up at him. “Eres como tu madre.. Impaciente. (You are just like your mother… Impatient). Mijo, I remember when I married your mother, she was so excited that she actually asked if we could start the wedding an hour early, just so we could see each other sooner. I can almost hear her laughing at the fact that her son is no better than her. How I wish she were here to see this. Soon, Javier. I promise.” 
“Do you think she’s gonna like the gift? You made sure she has it for today, right? And everything from her brothers too?” Javi asked, nervously biting at the tip of his thumb as he glanced down at his father before looking over at David and Charlie sitting on the couch, smiling back at him. 
“Yes, Javier. I triple checked last night. I’m sure that she will love it. I know she will love it. All of it. Now, why don’t you go put on your suit and we can leave a little ahead of schedule, I will just make sure to drive extra slow. Even slower than normal. I think if we wait any longer you may actually combust.” He teased, pulling Javi into a tight hug before releasing him, giving him a gentle pat on the back. 
“Alright boys, you heard the man, get your sorry asses moving and let’s get these monkey suits on, it’s time to get this boy married!” David cheered, holding up his beer to toast Javi before promptly chugging the rest of it down his throat and slamming it down on the table, soliciting another round of eye rolls and muffled laughter from the crowd. 
Silently nodding and smiling to himself, letting out one last reassuring breath before looking at the boys standing in front of him. 
“Fuck. I’m gonna get married.” 
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Back at the ranch, the last of getting ready was beginning to wrap up, all the girls' hair and makeup finally finished, and the youngest of the crew giddily dancing in their flower girl dresses, twirling and swirling in excitement at their pristine outfits as they gathered around you, patiently awaiting for you to get into your own wedding dress.  
For as long as you’d wanted to get married, you’d always known that you wanted your wedding dress to be simple- No excessive frills, poof, glitter, or anything that made you feel like you were playing dress up for the world’s goofiest fashion show, simply because it was your wedding, and your dress needed to reflect the extravagance of the event. Your style choice came as a surprise to no one, given the fact you had practically lived in your brother’s hand-me-down’s until the 8th grade, and even when your mom had flown down a few months ago to go dress shopping with you and Connie, she had even laid down the hammer with one of the wedding dress consultants that you wouldn’t even step anywhere near a dress that was an ounce too over the top. 
That’s why you were absolutely shocked that despite your firm parameters around what you wanted to wear for your big day, that you fell in love with the very first dress you tried on, and never looked back. 
It was everything you wanted and never you needed in a dress- a simple a-line skirt with thin straps that ran across your shoulders and scooped down your back, along with a delicate, lacy floral pattern stitched across your top that flowed down the wispy length of your gown. There were few times that you had ever admitted it to yourself, but you had truly never felt more beautiful than when you were wearing that dress, and when you had tried it on for the first time, only to turn around to see the tears welling in your mom and Connie’s eyes as you revealed it to them, it was every confirmation that you needed that this dress was made for you. 
And while you had been counting down the days in excitement, waiting to put your dress on for your big day, Javi had been counting down along with you, to the point where Connie had made the executive decision to keep the dress at her house to prevent any preemptive peeking, considering that Javi had spent every day since you had bought your dress telling you how he couldn’t wait to see how beautiful you were going to look in it, without even knowing a single clue about what you had boughten, besides your lovingly sarcastic and vague “It’s a dress, and it’s white, Jav.” 
But after all the time you had spent imagining what it would be like to finally put your dress on for your actual wedding day, you almost couldn’t believe that you were finally here, carefully taking the straps off the hanger where it had been resting, holding the beautiful, white fabric out in front of you with a goofy grin spread across your face, eyeing down the outfit that meant you got to spend forever with your best friend. 
“You ready to put it on?” Connie asked softly, her hand resting on your shoulder as she stepped behind you, excitedly gazing at your dress right alongside you. 
“Yeah.” You smiled, gently nodding your head as you looked back at Connie, taking one last deep breath before passing off the dress to her before shimmying out of your clothes, letting them fall to a pile on the floor before turning to Connie, stepping into the opening of the dress and carefully pulling each strap over your shoulders while she pulled the zipper along your back, letting out a little sigh of relief as it clasped at the top. With one more long inhale, you slowly turned around to face everyone, eagerly awaiting your reveal, picking up your gown with a little floof as it gently draped around you, meeting the tears and smiles painted across everyone’s faces while they gazed at you. 
“Auntie Bear, you look like a princess! Uncle Javi is gonna think that you look like the most beautifulest person he’s ever seen.” Olivia squealed, jumping up and down in excitement before running over to you, wrapping her little arms around your waist in a tight hug. 
“Oh sweetheart…. You look absolutely stunning.” Your mom sniffled through her tears, holding her hands crossed over her chest, soaking in your full wedding ensemble. 
“You look gorgeous. Like, seriously. I hope you know that Javi’s gonna lose his mind when he sees you in this.” Connie giggled, giving you a wink and a playful nudge, looking you up and down in astonishment. 
Stepping over to see yourself in the mirror, your heart skipped a beat to see yourself, your stomach churning with anxious, excited butterflies knowing that you were only getting closer and closer to finally seeing Javi and his reaction, trying your best to not your smirk grow too wide between your warm cheeks, thinking about his reaction. 
“You really think he’s gonna like it?” You asked, your eyes still fixed at your reflection in the mirror, gently swaying your lacy, floral skirt back and forth, running your hand against the delicate fabric. 
“Honey, I’ve watched that man ogle over you in a hockey jersey. I told the boys they’re in charge of making sure he doesn’t faint when you walk down the aisle.” Your mom teased, Connie nodding her head in agreement. 
“I’m gonna second your mom on this one, girl. Steve has a running bet with the guys on how long it takes Javi to cry after he sees you. I think the over/under is 2 seconds, but after seeing you right now, I’m convinced he’s all waterworks from the moment he lays eyes on you.” 
Connie’s comment made you laugh to yourself, shaking your head at the idea of Javi instantly bursting into tears from just the sight of you, but when you thought about seeing Javi in his tux (that you had already seen before, multiple times) and what a mess you were going to be, maybe the boy’s betting line didn’t seem so unfair after all. 
“Speaking of tears…” Connie smirked at your mom, nodding at her to signify some little secret they seemed to be in on, “There’s one last thing you need to see before… Well, we’ll let you open it up and find out.” 
With that, your mom reached over to one of the tables where a white box with a neatly wrapped bow had been hidden, your mom passing it to Connie before then passing it over to you, making you tilt your head in confusion as you took the box in your hands, looking back and forth between your mom, Connie and the box waiting for some sort of explanation. 
“What is this?” you questioned, still puzzled as you noticed the gift tag hidden under the bow, gently peeling it open, their suspicious smirks beginning to spread as you read the all too familiar scratchy handwriting inside. 
To: Osita
Love: Javi
Now even more confused, you carefully began unwrapping the bow from around the packaging, letting the ribbon fall to the floor, followed by the lid of the box, revealing another longer note from Javi, resting on top of a bed of neatly folded tissue paper. You sat down in one of the chairs close by, letting the box rest on your lap as you held the note in your hands, already beginning to tremble as you felt the tears start to well in your eyes as you began to read. 
Osita, 
I knew from the moment I met you, that I wanted nothing more than to spend the rest of my life with you. I can’t believe that day is finally here. I hope that this day is everything that you could ever dream it to be. 
I hope you know that if I could I would give you everything. The moon, the sun, the stars- if you wanted it, I would give it to you. 
But I know that no matter how hard I try, there is one thing I know can’t give to you, and that’s the presence of the people who aren’t with us anymore. 
And while I can’t bring back your brother or my mom to be here today, I hope that what’s in this box will remind you that they’ll always be here for you, no matter what. 
I know my mom would have wanted you to have this. There’s not a day that goes by that I wish she could have met you. She would have loved you so much. I hope she knows that you’re the best thing that could have ever happened to me. 
Your family was able to find something of your brother’s for you to have on here too- I wish I could have met him. I hope he knows how much I love you, and the beautiful and resilient woman you’ve become. I hope he knows how proud I am of you. 
I can’t wait to see you, amor. I can’t even imagine how beautiful you look right now. I’m the luckiest man in the world. 
I love you more than words, and I promise I’ll spend every day for the rest of my life making sure you know it. 
Happy Wedding Day, Osita. Soy tuyo para siempre (I’m yours forever). 
-J 
You could feel your heart practically exploding after reading what Javi had wrote for you, wiping away the wetness from your cheeks, you took a deep breath as you carefully set down his note next to you before ever so slowly peeling back the layers of tissue paper folded on top of one another, hiding the gift hidden beneath them. As the last layer of the delicate paper was shed, you let out a gasp, you hand covering your mouth in shock as you put together the pieces of Javi’s note and the present now sitting in your lap, looking up at everyone else in the room, nodding back at you with sympathetic smiles and tears in their eyes at your realization. 
Not only had Javi had given you his mother’s wedding veil to wear, but stitched in the bottom corner was a patch of Patrick’s old hockey jerseys, a small number 2 from his arm sleeve, the number he had worn for every jersey he had ever played in. 
“Oh my… Oh my god? I can’t, I- how did you- oh my god.” You whispered to yourself, your voice trembling in disbelief, tears now streaming down your face as you held the veil in your hands, your thumb gently tracing over the worn patch of Patrick’s jersey, truly too stunned to speak at what Javi had done for you, to make sure a piece of two people who were no longer with you could still be a part of the biggest day of your life.
“Can I put it on?” Your mom asked, smiling at you with tears in her eyes, walking towards you as you nodded, handing her over the veil as she gently nestled it into your hair, straightening it out behind you, even more tears streaming down her face while she watched your reaction in the mirror. 
Not only was Lucia’s veil absolutely beautiful, if you hadn’t known any better, you would have thought Javi had asked someone to see what your dress looked like to pick out a veil that matched it perfectly. Like it truly was meant to be.
Still too shocked to form any sort of coherent thought, you stared at yourself in the mirror, silently smiling and crying at your reflection until a soft knock came from outside the bedroom door, making everyone in the room whip their heads around to see all of the boys who had just arrived peeking through the door frame, waiting in anticipation. 
“Can we come in? We’re dyin’ to see you, Cubby. Well, the one who’s dyin to see you the most we banished to the outside so he wasn’t even tempted to come in, but the rest of us fools still wanna see you too.” Your dad’s voice chuckled from behind the door, making you break from your crying just enough to let a soft laugh escape from your chest, nodding your head as you turned around to greet the gang gathered at the door. 
Growing up the youngest of 3 brothers, sentimental wasn’t a term thrown around in your household very often. Of course you loved your family, and they loved you, but you and your brothers had often joked that it’d probably be easier to projectile vomit than to actually say the words “I love you” eachother. So that’s why when your dad and brothers walked through the door with awestruck looks on their faces, you couldn’t help but start crying even more. 
Well, until they actually got a chance to speak. 
“Don’t cry you dingus, you’re gonna mess up all your makeup. And god knows how long it took to try and make you look like you didn’t just crawl out of a garbage can.” David quietly snickered, pulling you in for a much gentler than usual headlock before wrapping his arms around you for a legitimate hug. 
“Fuck off, David. How many people had to help you put that suit on, huh? You use every last brain cell trying to do up those buttons?” You teased back, trying to wipe the tears that had been rolling down your cheeks before giving him a loving slap to the stomach, making the two of you laugh even more. 
“You know his dumbass needed all the help he could get.” Charlie joked, pulling you in for another hug before stepping back to look you up and down, “Not too shabby. You clean up good, Cubby.” 
“Thanks Charlie.” 
The last one to step towards you was your dad, who you could tell was trying with everything in him not to absolutely burst into tears, putting one hand on your shoulder as he smiled at you. “I’ll say it once and I won’t say it again because you know as well as I do I’m not good with the sappy shit. You look beautiful, Cubby. I’m so proud of you. I know Patrick would have been too. Although that motherfucker is probably pissed at us that we cut the number off of his favorite jersey, but I think he’ll forgive us.” Wrapping you in a tight squeeze, your dad engulfed you in a bear hug, quickly followed by your brothers and your mom, trapping you in the center of their bodies, knowing you all were wishing there was one more person there in your group to fill in your hug. 
“I love you guys. Thank you.” You whispered, just loud enough to make sure they could hear, but quiet enough that even though your brothers had heard it, just this once, they wouldn’t give you shit for it. And just this once, everyone seemed to silently agree that they really, truly, did love you too. 
After a few more seconds of your group hug, there was another soft knock on the door, followed by another familiar voice, Chucho and Steve now peeking through the doorway to say hello. 
“Is it okay if we come in, Mija?” Chuco asked, already halfway through the door in excitement. 
“Yes, of course.” You sniffed, breaking free from the middle of your group hug to greet Chucho, less than shocked that his hug was almost tighter than the 4 other members of your family combined. 
“Mija… Mija, you look so beautiful. Oh, goodness. I had always saved this veil one day, just in case. And even though it sat in the attic for years, I pulled it out the week that Javier first met you. I don’t think that there was ever a doubt in anyone’s mind that you weren’t the one for him. My sweet Lucia would have been so happy to know that you have given Javier everything he never thought that he deserved. Oh, how I wish with everything she could have been here today to see how happy you make him. But I hope that you know, she would have been so excited that you get to be a part of our family.” He grinned through his tears, stepping back to look at you with a soft smile on his face, gently reaching up to wipe away the wetness on your cheek before pulling you back in for another hug. “I hope you know that Javier is going to be a wreck when he sees you. Poor boy has been in shambles all day waiting to see you.” 
“I don’t think I’ve ever seen the man this anxious. And that’s sayin’ somethin’.” Steve chimed in, laughing to himself. “You look great, sweetheart. Chucho’s right, Javi’s ‘bout to be a goddamn mess.” 
As if your heart couldn’t feel any fuller from all of the love and warmth overflowing into the room, you had almost forgotten about the one person that had brought you all together in the first place- Javi. 
You could feel the pace of your heart begin to race, your stomach swirling in anticipation as the reality of the situation slowly began to sink in. 
Your future husband was here, and there was nothing more in the world that you wanted than to see him. Not soon, not at the end of the aisle, not waiting for you at the altar, right this very second. 
“He’s here, right? Javi?” You asked, biting down on your lip to contain the stupid grin growing between your cheeks, swaying back and forth on your heels in childlike impatience. Before you could barely ask your question, all eyes in the room were on your, giving you a collective look that seemed to scream “Seriously? You can’t wait either?” without having to say a word. 
As you could hear the beginning rumblings of protest, David stepped in as the most unexpected voice of reason, holding his hands up to the crowd in your defense, trying to silence everyone’s potential disagreement for what you were about to suggest. 
“Listen… Y’all know as well as I do that we could hold back these two with iron restraints, and they’d still probably find a way to see each other before the ceremony. And to be quite honest, I am pretty convinced if we don’t let them, one of them is gonna fucking combust, and I am not willing to be held personally responsible for any damages done before you two idiots can even get married.” 
Giving you a silent nod of approval, David stepped back to pat your back with the loving force that only a brother could, as everyone else in the room seemed to very quickly agree with his sentiment, joining with head bobs of quiet agreement. 
“I’ll go let the big man know you’re comin’. Gotta find some way to redeem myself before I bust his balls in my speech later.” Steve snickered, giving you a quick wink before quickly disappearing out the door to find the man behind it, waiting half as patiently as you. 
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To say that Javi was disappointed when the boys booted him to the outdoors while everyone else got to go in and see you was the understatement of the year. Even though he couldn’t have been sitting on the front porch of his childhood home for more than 10 minutes, it felt like he had been waiting for hours, counting down each second until the moment he finally got to lay his eyes on you. After about 2 minutes of sitting in his dad’s rocking chair, nervously swaying as his hands shifted between his fingers drumming on his legs and balling up in anxious fists, he pushed himself up to stand, walking off the steps of the porch to pace in the front yard under the warmth of the late June sun. 
He had been so preoccupied as he meandered the front of the home, picturing just how breathtaking you would look as you walked down the aisle to greet him- how gorgeous you would be in your dress, your hair, your stunning smile, everything about you that made him look at you and know that he was the luckiest man in the world. That you were his. That you were everything that made him feel like home. It wasn’t until after a few careless steps too far around the corner of the house, that Javi was catching himself from tumbling to the ground as he tripped over a larger than suspected rock underneath him, quietly cursing under his breath while he tried to steady himself, peering down at the ground to see what had almost caused his fall. And when he finally read the words etched into the round stone beneath him, he couldn’t help but laugh at the fact the thing resting below him was none other than the heading that read “Lucia’s Garden”. 
“Jesus Christ, Ma, you’re not even here and you’re gonna take me out before the wedding even happens.” Javi chuckled to himself, gently tapping his foot against the rock, staring at the worn and weathered letters of her name. “You know, the very first time Pops met her, he let her work on the garden. I couldn’t believe it, because he barely lets me within 10 feet of here without worrying I’m gonna ruin something. But uh, I think that he knew. I think before he even met her, he already knew that she was the one.” 
Letting out a soft sigh, Javi crouched down, squatting next to the stone, gently brushing his thumb across the grittiness, carefully tracing each letter back and forth, praying with every ounce of him that one way or another, she could hear what he had to say. 
“I really wish you could be here, Mom. I really miss you. I really wish she could have gotten to meet you. I know that you’d love her.” Javi paused, his eyes beginning to well with tears, letting out a long, shaky exhale to try and compose himself. “She’s so good to me. I don’t know what I ever did to deserve her. She’s made me a better man. A man that I’m proud of. A man I hope you’d be proud of, too.” He paused again, pinching the bridge of his nose before wiping his wet cheeks with the back of his hand. “I know that uh- I know before, um you were gone, that you really worried about me. I know you’d never say it, but um, I could tell. And I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry, Mom.” His voice was now barely above a whisper, years of guilt and anger bubbling in his chest for the person he’d been, the life his mother had lived to see him play out while halfway across the world, fighting for a cause he wasn’t even sure he believed in anymore. 
“But, I um- I just- fuck, I just want you to know that I’m okay. I’m more than okay, now. This is the happiest I’ve ever been, all because of her. We’re gonna build a house, we’re gonna have kids, we’re gonna be so happy, Mom. So fucking happy. Te amo mucho, Mama. Siempre lo hare (I love you so much, Mama. I always will).” 
So focused on the quiet conversation with the simple stone sitting beneath him, Javi hadn’t even heard Steve’s hurried footsteps creeping up behind him, making Javi practically jump out of his skin as Steve’s hand met his shoulder. 
“Hey, buddy. You ready to-” 
“Jesus, fuck Murph. You scared the fucking shit out of me.” Javi gasped, thoroughly startled as he shot to his feet, quickly trying to wipe the tears from his face as he faced his friend. 
“Sorry, man, I didn’t mean to, promise!” Steve laughed, holding his hands up in defense before letting his expression shift to concern at Javi’s face. “Hey, you okay, Jav?” 
“Yeah, yeah, I’m- No, I’m good, sorry. Just um- Just wish my mom could have been here for this, ya know? She would have really fucking loved her.” 
“Hey, it’s okay, man. My dad was gone before my wedding, too. Fuckin’ sucks.” Steve smiled sympathetically, “Truth be told Jav, that girl you’re gonna marry, I think it’s hard for anyone not to love her. Your mom would be really happy for ya.” 
“Thanks, Murph.” Javi huffed, a small smile spreading across his face at Steve’s genuine sympathy, a trait he didn’t see very often. 
“C’mere, buddy.” Without giving him a choice, Steve wrapped his arms around Javi, pulling him in for a hug with a few stiff pats on the back before pulling away with a nod, hands on his hips as he stared down his friend with a shit eating grin, knowing the news he was about to tell Javi would instantly turn his mood around. “Speakin’ of your future wife… You wanna see her?” 
“Wait, like, now? Like, actually?” Javi’s mood instantly shifted, his entire body lighting up at the prospect, looking at Steve with relief glistening in his dark brown eyes. 
“Yeah, actually. Thank God your wife is just as obsessed with you as you are with her. Jesus Christ, I think the both of ya would have fuckin’ exploded if we made you wait ‘till the ceremony.” Steve chuckled, grabbing Javi’s shoulder and giving it a playful shake. “Alright, you turn around so it’s a surprise when she gets out here, lemme go get her. And Jav?” Steve asked, turning his head back over his shoulder to look at his friend as he began to walk away back towards the house. 
“Yeah, Murph?” 
“You’re losin’ that bet. No way in fuckin’ hell you ain’t sobbin’ like a baby the second you lay eyes on her.” 
As Steve disappeared back into the house, Javi couldn’t help but quietly laugh to himself, because as much as he wanted to dish shit back to Steve, he knew his friend was right- He was about to be a fucking mess. 
“So? Are we good? Does he wanna see me?” You asked, anxiously waiting at the door, feet tapping on the floor hidden underneath your dress as you waited for Steve’s return. 
“No offense, Sweetheart, but that's just about the dumbest question I've ever heard. What do you think? Of course the bastard wants to see you. I’m just gonna warn ya though, that man is a hot mess, and I really think ya just may kill him the second he sees you.” The two of you laughed to yourselves, feeling your heart beat faster and faster in your chest with every passing second, using all of your self restraint to keep from bolting out the door past Steve to see Javi. “Alright, I won’t keep ya any longer, go get ‘em, killer.” 
Before you could get yourself out the door, you embraced Steve in a hug, catching him off guard for a moment before he hugged you back, smiles spread across both your faces. 
“Thanks, Steve.”
“Sweetheart, you ain’t got nothin’ to thank me for. If anything, hell, I should be thankin’ you. You two lovebirds are a match made in fuckin’ heaven. I was real worried about that old bastard for a long time. Glad to know I don’t have to worry about him anymore. Well, at least too much more. Now, enough about my sorry ass, go see your husband.” 
With a silent nod, you gave Steve one more quick hug before you were turning the knob to the front door, quietly stepping out to the front porch to see Javi’s back to you at the bottom of the stairs, already trying to fight the tears welling in your eyes without even seeing his face. As you closed the door behind you, Javi instantly perked up, turning his head back over his shoulder just enough to speak, but not enough to see that it was you who was walking to greet him. 
“She good to come out, Murph? I’m fucking dying out here.” Javi laughed, making you giggle at the fact that he had no idea it was you who was standing behind him. 
“Hate to break it to you, but unfortunately, I am not Steve. So sorry.” You snickered, practically feeling Javi’s eyes roll at your sarcastic comment, even though the both of you were thankful for a little humor to break the anxious anticipation that had been festering in your stomachs since this morning. 
“God, you’re such a dork.” He laughed, his back still turned to you as you took your final steps down the stairs with your dress in hand, trying to fluff it back out as you settled yourself behind him. 
“Hey, you’ve got me for the rest of your life, babe. Lucky you. I’m not gonna lie, don’t think I cleaned up half bad, ya know, if you wanna see.” You teased, giving Javi a playful poke on the back as you bit down on your bottom lip, so excited to see Javi’s reaction you truly thought your heart was going to explode out of your chest. 
“Baby, you have no fucking idea. C-can I, can I see you?” Javi stammered, his voice already beginning to tremble. 
“Well, I think I’m gonna implode if you don’t, so yeah.” You took one last long inhale in, holding your breath as Javi slowly began to turn to face you, feeling like everything was suddenly moving in slow motion when Javi’s eyes finally locked with yours. 
Javi couldn’t even get a word out before his hands were covering his mouth, his jaw dropping open in absolute awe to see you standing behind him. The tears he swore to himself he’d try to fight back were already streaming down his face, his eyes looking you up and down over and over again, trying to soak in every ounce of you, only crying harder as he noticed each and every new detail of you standing before him. 
“Osita… Oh my god. Oh my god.” Javi’s hand stayed glued over his mouth to try and keep his jaw from dropping any further than it already was, absolutely mesmerized by your beauty, barely able to get out any sort of coherent thought out of his brain. “Baby, you, oh my god, you look so beautiful. You look so fucking beautiful.”  
While you figured that Javi would cry and be excited to see you, nothing could have prepared you for the reaction that you were witnessing in real time, watching your future husband become a complete, blubbering mess at the sight of you, making it damn near impossible for you to hold it together yourself, considering the fact that you were also busy trying to take in the ridiculously handsome sight of Javi in his tuxedo- his broad body filling out every inch of the black fabric perfectly, hair and mustache impeccably groomed, and sweet, teary brown eyes sparkling in the sunlight, making you melt, tears rolling down your face as your heart bursted at the seams over and over again, wondering how in the world this wasn’t all some sort of a perfect dream. 
“You like it?” You managed to choke out through your happy sobs, your cheeks straining from the stupid grin that had spread across your face, the both of you radiating in the blissful glow of your excitement. 
“Like it? Osita, are you fucking kidding me? Do I like it? Holy shit, baby, you are the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen. You look... Osita, you look incredible.” Javi laughed through his tears, taking another step back to grab your hand, looking you up and down again before holding your arms up to twirl you in a circle, your dress flowing around you, making you giggle as you finally finished rotating to lock eyes with Javi again. “Hermosa, I knew you were gonna look amazing, but I- I never, I never could have imagined that you were gonna look like this.” 
“Coming from you? Jesus, Jav, I’m convinced you’re trying to kill me in that tux before we can even get married. You look so good. Javi?” You paused, grabbing his other hand so your fingers were intertwined, his thumb automatically tracing soft circles on your skin. 
“Yeah, baby?” Javi replied, biting down on his bottom lip as he gulped, trying to hold back the lump resting in his throat from his happy tears as he stared down at you. 
“Javi… We’re getting married. We’re getting fucking married.” 
“Fuck. We’re getting married. Holy shit.” As if the smile on Javi’s face couldn’t get any wider, his boyish grin gleamed between his cheeks, wrapping his arms around you to engulf you in a tight hug against his chest, the two of you laughing to yourself in disbelief that you had finally made it here- that only a few short moments, the two of you got to begin the rest of your forevers together. “Can I- Can I kiss you?” He asked in a soft whisper, pulling back to tilt his head towards yours, sliding one of his hands up to gently cup your cheek, shifting your gaze up towards him. 
“What kind of question is that, you dork?” You teased, bringing your mouth close enough to his to let your lips barely ghost over one anothers, butterflies swarming in a sea of excitement. 
“Because I’m afraid if I start kissing you, I’m not gonna be able to stop.” 
“Do your worst, Peña.” 
As if time began to move in slow motion, your mouths met with an electric and tender intensity, slowly becoming a mix of tangled tongues and teeth, your hand sneaking under the opening of Javi’s suit jacket to wrap around his waist as the grip around your face began to tighten, your bodies melting together as one in a nearly magical moment- Well, as magical as it could get before being interrupted by all your friends and family that had gathered on the front porch to share in the moment with you. 
“Hey! Lovebirds! Jesus Christ, save it for the ceremony!” Steve shouted, a chorus of laughter erupting behind him, startling you and Javi. 
“Good Lord, Steve, give it a rest. They missed each other!” Connie sighed, shaking her head at her husband’s loud interruption. 
“Yeah, that’s our sister, you pervert!” David chimed in, the familiarity of his taunting voice making you roll your eyes, putting your hands on your hips as you stared back at the crowd. 
“Will you can it, you dingus? It’s their wedding day for Christ’s sake!” Your dad groaned, slapping David in the back of the head. 
“Daddy, what’s a pervert?” Olivia asked, looking over at Charlie as Chucho held her against his hip, grimacing as he tried not to laugh at the exchange. 
“Seriously David, really? Grow up! They’re so adorable, let your sister have this.” Your mom scolded, promptly giving him another whack to the stomach, you and Javi now laughing to each other at the scene that was unfolding in front of you on the porch. 
“Well,” You giggled, giving Javi a playful nudge, “It seems like everyone else has been able to solve the ‘you not being able to stop kissing me’ problem.” 
“Jesus Christ…” Javi sighed to himself, running his hand over his face as he stared back into the crowd watching you and him, “Can we get a few more minutes to ourselves before the ceremony? Please? I haven’t seen her all day.” 
“C’mon, let’s give the two some privacy. Lindas (cuties), why don’t we go look to make sure all the flowers are ready. Maybe we can practice walking down the aisle again?” Cucho smiled at the two of you, giving Javi a subtle wink as the girls began to giggle with delight, racing off to the backyard in a fit of squeals of excitement. 
“We’ll do another check of everything, too, I wanna make sure everything’s in place before the ceremony. Do you mind helping, Connie? Boys, will you go check to make sure all the food and drinks are ready for cocktail hour” Your mom asked, picking up on Chucho’s hint to give the two of you some space, now trying to rope your dad, brothers and Steve into that equation as well. 
“Can I have a beer if I help?” 
“Jesus Christ, David.” 
Everyone's conversations began to trail as they headed their separate ways, leaving you and Javi standing in the front yard alone, once again,  looking at each other with mischievous grins- Yours from knowing damn well that Javi had something up his sleeve, and Javi’s from the something stored up there. 
“What’s that look for, Jav?” You smirked, crossing your arms over your chest, raising an eyebrow at Javi as you waited for him to let you in on whatever plan he had brewing in his brain. 
“I think… I think that I really have to go to the bathroom.” Javi replied, boyish grin glowing between his cheeks as he wrapped his arm around your waist, pulling you close to his chest. 
“And you’re really making it seem like going to the bathroom is a two person job.” You snickered, rolling your eyes at Javi, knowing exactly what he was implying. “Baby, the ceremony is gonna start in an hour, everyone’s here and I don’t think there’s gonna be enough-” 
Before you could finish your thought, Javi was swallowing the rest of your sentence in a long, deep kiss, only pulling away to quietly rasp in your ear. 
“Is that a challenge, Osita? I promise I’ll be fast, baby, you just look so fucking beautiful, and I don’t think I’m gonna make it if I can’t have my wife all to myself, even if it’s just for a few minutes. ” 
“God, you’re such a drama queen.” You sighed with a snicker, heat creeping in your core knowing that you had just as little self control as Javi did, peeking your head to make sure that everyone had dispersed before they watched you and Javi sneak inside together. “We have to be quick, okay? I just don’t want-AH! Javi!” You squealed as Javi was scooping you off your feet mid sentence, very fittingly carrying you bridal style across the front yard and up the steps of the porch, nudging the door open with his hip, the two of you all giggles and smiles as he whisked you through the house, stopping at his childhood bedroom, promptly setting you on the ground to shut the door behind him. 
With a click of the lock and a rattle of the door handle to make sure they were safe from intruders, Javi’s hands were all over you in an instant, his mouth crashing into yours as he walked you back towards the ensuite attached to his bedroom, hoisting you up onto the kitchen sink as he shut the bathroom door behind him for an extra layer of protection. 
You could tell how hard Javi was trying to keep himself in check, considering the amount of time and effort that had gone into your hair and makeup, and the delicacy of your dress, but it was taking every ounce of self control he had to not rip it right off you. Softly letting his kisses trail down your body, Javi began to sink to his knees, smirking up at you with his awestruck gaze as he carefully began to lift up the layers of your dress, running his hands up and down your bare thighs. 
“Do you know how fucking beautiful you are, Osita? Fuck, I can’t believe you’re gonna be my wife. My beautiful, amazing, perfect wife.” The hot breath of his words danced against your skin as Javi peppered soft kisses up the inside of your thighs, his head almost disappearing underneath your dress as he creeped closer and closer to your core, already soaked with your arousal waiting for Javi’s touch. “You’re mine forever, Hermosa. Fuck, I’m so lucky. I love you so much.” 
“I-I love you too, Javi.” You whined, your breath already shaky as Javi’s fingers hooked around the waistband of your underwear, tugging them down your legs and letting them drop to the floor below you before letting his fingers glide through your folds, already glistening with your arousal. 
“Fuck, you’re already so wet, baby. Can’t believe this perfect pussy is all mine forever too. God, you’re so fucking perfect. Everything about you. Mmmm, I know we don’t have a lot of time, but I have to taste you, Hermosa. Can I, baby?” Javi mewled, making you gasp as he gently slid two fingers into your aching core, curling them to bump against the spongy spot inside you that already had you fisting at the edge of the bathroom counter to try and keep your composure, and better yet, your voice down. 
“Javi… Oh, shit. Fuck, Fu-ahhhhh.” You moaned, feeling the strong arch of Javi’s nose bumping against your clit, placing a soft kiss there before the flat of his tongue licked a long, broad stroke across your cunt, putting just the right amount of pressure on your sensitive bundle of nerves as his fingers worked in tandem to send the sweet tingling sensation to start building in your spine. 
While Javi would have loved to take every second of his sweet time to savor in watching you fall apart on his tongue, he knew just as well as you that he was working on a limited schedule, and wanted, no, needed to make sure he could get you off at least once before his luck ran out. 
Javi began to work his tongue against your clit, circling and flicking in fast and firm motions as his fingers curled deeper into your heat, his free hand hooking around your thigh and draping it over his shoulder, digging his fingertips into the meat of your flesh, like he was trying to ground himself more than you. 
You could already feel the coil in your stomach beginning to tighten from the way Javi was working so relentlessly to make you come undone, drinking every ounce of you up as, his lips now latching around your sensitive bundle of nerves, making your back arch and mind go blank while that all too familiar tingle began to creep through your core, cunt beginning to clench tighter and tighter around Javi’s fingers with every movement of his mouth against you. 
“That’s it, mi amor.” Javi cooed, peeking his head out from under you just enough so that his sweet, brown eyes were locked with yours, the hot words of his breath dancing against your pussy as his fingers continued to rock in and out of you. “I’ve got you, Osita. Forever. I’ve always got you. Promento (I promise).” 
Before you could respond, your jaw dropped open and face scrunched in pleasure as Javi dove back in, burying his face in your cunt as each press of his tongue became more firm and precise than the last, feeling your pussy begin to flutter as you clutched tighter around the edge of the counter, trying to keep from screaming out in pleasure and raise any suspicion. But as your legs began to tremble and heart race, teetering on the brink of collapse, it was taking every ounce of willpower you had left to make that happen 
“Fuck, Javi. Oh shit- Baby, I’m so close, I’m so close, I’m so cl-ooohhhhh.” You whimpered, feeling your orgasm crash through you, pleasure radiating in your veins as you fell apart, losing all inhibitions to keep yourself quiet as you threw your head back in all consuming bliss. With his fingers still buried in your cunt, gently working you through your high, Javi shot back up, his mouth engulfing yours in an electric kiss to try and capture your ragged moans that had been coating the walls of the bathroom, the tangy taste of you still lingering on his lips. 
Your heartbeat finally began to slow, your chest heaving in long, heavy breaths as you slumped into Javi, your head resting on his shoulder, shuttering at the loss of Javi’s fingers inside you. He carefully pulled them out, bringing them to his mouth and sucking them clean with a devilish smirk of satisfaction on his face. 
“Tastes so fucking sweet. My wife tastes so fucking sweet. Fuck, I don’t think I’ll ever get over that.” Javi chuckled with a boyish grin, gently cupping his hand under your chin as the other wrapped around your waist. 
“Get over what? Calling me your wife or eating me out?” You giggled, still trying to catch your breath as you came down from your high, biting down on your lip as your arms draped over Javi’s shoulders, your fingers tracing soft circles at the nape of his neck. 
“Both. Fuck, I love you so much.” 
“I love you so much too, you menace.” You smiled, tilting your head back to kiss Javi again, so blissfully lost in the moment, that the two of you both about jumped out of your skin when you heard a loud knock coming from the bedroom door. 
“Jav? You in here, buddy?” 
“Goddamnit, Murph…” 
The familiar twang of Steve’s voice made you freeze in fear, Javi quickly helping you down off the counter as he cursed to himself before the two of you were trying your best to fix yourselves up in the mirror to try and hide any signs of the horny whirlwind that had blown through the bathroom. 
“Javi?” Steve called out again, continuing to knock on the door. 
“Yeah, I’m here, just uh- Just give me a second, Murph.” Javi sighed, the two of you trying to keep from laughing at your current predicament, wondering how the hell Javi was going to talk you both out of this one. 
“What’s the plan, Peña?” You giggled, giving Javi a playful nudge as he carefully turned the knob to the bathroom door. 
“To tell Murph to fuck off if he tries to give me shit.” The two of you quietly snorted, feeling a little less guilty than you would have if it wasn’t your wedding day. “You stay here, okay? I’ll take care of him.” He smiled, pressing a soft kiss on your cheek as he opened the door. 
“God, I love you.” 
“I love you too, Osita.” 
Closing the bathroom door behind him, Javi took a few deep breaths as he ran his hands through his hair, turning the knob to open up his bedroom door to be greeted by an unamused Steve leaning in the door frame. 
“What’s up, Murph? We were just, uh-” Javi asked, trying his best to stay casual. 
“I fuckin’ knew it. Don’t ‘what’s up’ me, you horny bastard.” Steve groaned, rolling his eyes at his friend. “Y’all haven’t even made it to the ceremony yet! Jesus Fuckin’ Christ. Everyone’s been lookin’ for y’all. I had a fuckin’ feeling this is what you two were up two, and as your Best Man, I’ll cover for your ass now, but I sure as shit ain’t doin’ this all night for you two rabbits. Now c’mon, Casanova, go get your wife from in there and come outside. Remember that thing y’all gotta do where you actually go get married?” Steve teased, slapping Javi in the chest before shaking his head at his friend, his cheeks pink in embarrassment as his eyes darted to the floor. 
“Yeah, yeah, we’ll be out in a second.” Javi grumbled sheepishly, quietly accepting defeat. 
“An actual second, ya hear? Not a horny Javier Peña second, or I swear to God.” Steve groaned, raising an eyebrow at Javi. 
“Promise.” 
“Alright then. Chop, chop, Mr. Peña. Let’s go get your ass married.” Steve laughed, grabbing Javi by the shoulder before giving him a little shake and disappearing back down the hallway. 
Hearing Steve’s voice and footsteps fade, you slowly peeked your head out of the bathroom door to see Javi standing by himself, head buried in his hands, pinching the bridge of his nose before turning back to see your face, equally embarrassed as his. 
“... He knew, didn’t he?” You grimaced, now fully opening the door and walking through to meet Javi on the other side. 
“Yup.” Javi sighed, adding an extra emphasis to the “p” with a pop. 
“Well… Either Steve has the world’s most unlucky timing, or he just needs to do a better job of minding his business.” The two of you snickered, crossing your arms over your chest as you stared up at Javi. “Or maybe someone needs to stop being such a bad influence.” You teased, poking Javi in the chest. 
“Me? I’m the bad influence? Okay.” Javi chuckled, teasing you right back. “Sorry I’m getting married to the hottest woman alive and I can’t help myself. My gorgeous wife is one not making it any easier on me.” 
“Still not technically your wife yet, you dork.” 
“Close enough.” 
Grabbing you by your waist, Javi pulled you flush against chest, tilting his head in for a long, tender kiss- the kind that made heat creep through your cheeks and butterflies churn in your stomach, the kind that made your heart beat a million miles a minute, the kind that seemed to make everything else in the world stand still, even if just for a moment. The kind of kiss that made you know without a single doubt that you had never been more in love than you were at this very moment. 
“I love you, Javi.” 
“I love you too, Osita.” 
“You wanna go get married?” 
“Mrs. Peña,” Javi grinned, grabbing your hand to interlock it with his, “There’s nothing I’ve ever wanted more in my fucking life.”
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punkshort · 7 months
Text
look what we've become - ch.1
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Chapter Summary: Tommy asks for your help proposing to Maria, causing both you and Joel to reflect on your own relationship.
Chapter Warnings: language, mentions of alcohol, fear of commitment, smut (18+ MDNI), fingering, oral (f receiving), p in v unprotected sex, dirty talk
WC: 6.1K
Series masterlist | Next Chapter
A/N: hi everyone! if you're new and didn't read the first story, this follows a slightly different timeline. Essentially, Joel and Tommy had a very successful construction business in NYC and reader worked for them pre-outbreak, so I've written in this story a slightly younger version of Joel given the timeline.
Thank you to everyone who loved the first one so much that it encouraged me to write a sequel! I really hope you like it, and I want to emphasize there will be a happy ending to this story. Thanks for reading!
June 2007
"Can't thank you enough for your help, darlin'," Tommy said, his voice trying and failing to hide the anxiety that plagued his mind.
"Don't mention it," you told him, finishing up the final touches on the bouquet of flowers, wrapping a beautiful satin ribbon around the stems before handing it over. "What's the occasion?"
"I'm gonna ask her to marry me," he blurted out, and your hands instantly flew to your mouth, covering your excited gasp.
"Tommy!" you squealed, bouncing on the balls of your feet, trying to contain your energy before giving up and rounding your workstation to wrap your arms around him, being mindful not to crush the flowers he was holding. "I'm so happy for you, oh my god!"
"Well, thanks, but she ain't agreed, yet," he said, running a shaky hand through his long hair.
"She's going to say yes, don't be silly," you told him, a smile permanently etched on your face. You and Maria have been close friends ever since you met three years ago. You considered her to be your closest friend in Jackson, and you were thrilled at the idea of your best friend about to experience the happiest moment of her life. Tommy had come a long way from the man you knew before the outbreak, his days of chasing every girl that tossed him a smile long behind him.
"So, how are you going to do it?" you asked excitedly as he shifted back and forth on his feet. He paused and flicked his eyes up.
"Uh," he said, growing shifty. "Well, I dunno. Do I gotta plan somethin'?"
"Yes!" you said, rolling your eyes. He rubbed the back of his neck anxiously.
"Well, shit, I didn't think that far ahead!" he exclaimed, turning to pace around the greenhouse.
"Don't stress, we'll figure something out," you assured him, scooting back so you could lift your hips and sit on your workstation tabletop. "Did you find a ring?"
"Yeah, I got that, at least," he said, his shoulders relaxing a bit as he dug it out of his pocket. You plucked it from his fingers carefully so you could get a better look at the three round, shiny diamonds set on the center of a gold band.
"It's perfect," you told him warmly, handing it back. He allowed a small smile as he shoved it back into the safety of his pocket.
"Will you help me figure out how to do it?" he asked.
"Of course I will," you told him. "She doesn't like a fuss. It should be private. Small. Romantic. And you need to come up with something thoughtful to say." He nodded, his gaze traveling to the wall, lost in thought before he shifted his eyes back to you.
"Like what?"
"Tommy! Come on!" you scolded him, shoving his shoulder.
"I ain't good at all that, cut me some slack!" he said with a grin. "I need an example. What would you wanna hear?"
You paused, your smile frozen on your face as you felt your blood run cold. Your smile began to slowly slip as your heart slammed in your chest, anxiety creeping up your neck, ears ringing. Naturally, you were thinking about Joel bending down on one knee, professing his love to you and begging you to be his forever. A thought that should have filled you with warmth, but instead, scared you shitless. And your reaction itself made it even worse. Why would the thought of Joel proposing scare you? You never wanted anyone else. Once you met, it just wasn't a question anymore. You were his, and he was yours. An understanding, it didn't need to be said. So why does the thought of him saying it make you feel like you're falling down an endless hole in the ground?
"Um," you managed to squeak out, but Tommy had already moved on, wrapped up in his own dilemma.
"I think I know what I could say," he said, not noticing your sudden paralysis. "Can you do me a favor, though? Could you round up any candles you ain't usin'? Preferably unscented, don't need the whole place smellin' like a mix of cookies, pine and roses."
"Yeah, of course. I'll look when I get home and bring them over," you mumbled.
"Great, thanks again, darlin'! I'll see you in a bit," he said with a more confident smile, rushing out the door to leave you with your thoughts, your legs swinging mindlessly over the edge of the workstation. The workstation Joel had thoughtfully built for you because he insisted you needed somewhere proper to work in the greenhouse.
And he also broke the only desk you had.
You hung your head, feeling shameful and confused. Why hadn't you ever thought about this before? What would you have done if he proposed and you never sorted out your feelings about marriage? About kids?
"Shit," you whispered, the mere thought of kids making your throat squeeze shut. Bringing a child into this world? He wouldn't want to do that, would he?
Maybe you were getting ahead of yourself. Maybe he felt the same as you. Why change something that's working so well? You both loved each other, what difference did it make? But the devil on your shoulder threw back a counter argument.
If it didn't make a difference, then why didn't you want to do it?
You rubbed the heels of your hands into your eyes aggressively. You really needed to stop making problems out of nothing. This wasn't about you and Joel, it was about Tommy and Maria.
You sighed and made your way down the long aisle towards the door, deciding it was close enough to the end of your shift.
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"Hey, I was callin' your name, didn't you hear me?"
You nearly jumped out of your skin and turned around to find Joel leaning against the doorframe of the spare bedroom. He eyed up the half empty box next to you on the floor and looked back at you questioningly.
"No, sorry, guess I was lost in my thoughts or something," you told him, turning back to rifle through the plastic storage tote. Joel took a few steps into the room and sat down on the spare bed, the springs squeaking under his weight.
"What're you thinkin' about?" he asked as he watched you pulling out each candle and giving them a sniff before deciding which pile to add them to.
"Huh?" you asked him, still jumpy from your revelation earlier. "Oh, it's nothing, really." Even to your own ears, the excuse sounded lame, so you weren't surprised when Joel didn't buy it.
"Must be somethin' if it's got you all distracted," he urged you gently. You shook your head and gave him a believing smile.
"No, really, it's nothing. Just thinking about work. I left early today, I'm just thinking about what I need to do tomorrow," you lied as you finished up going through the candles, snapping the plastic tote lid back on and shoving it into the spare closet.
"Why'd you leave early?" Joel asked with his eyebrows knit. "Feelin' okay?"
He's always so thoughtful, so concerned about you. It made the pit in your stomach worsen, the guilt flaring.
"Oh, yeah, fine. I just told Tommy I would get him these extra candles as soon as possible, so I'm gonna head over there real quick," you explained. As you leaned down to pick up the box, Joel's hand shot out to stop you, choosing instead to lift it up himself.
"I can do it," he said, then looked back down at the open box curiously. "Why does he need so many candles?"
"Well," you said, turning to leave the room so your face wouldn't give anything away when you told him. "He's going to propose to Maria. He has some special thing planned, involving candles, I guess. We should probably standby in case he lights the house on fire," you joked over your shoulder as you made your way down to the kitchen. You knew you were rambling a bit, but you hoped Joel didn't pick up on your nervousness.
"He's what?" Joel exclaimed, stopping dead in his tracks in the hallway, still holding the box of candles. You turned your attention towards him again as you leaned against the kitchen counter.
"Yep, he told me today. He asked me to make a bouquet for him at work," you told him, studying his face carefully. Joel looked stunned as he stared out the window behind you while he processed the information.
"Well, goddamn," he said, finally snapping out of it with a smirk. "I'll take these over so I can give him shit for not tellin' me sooner." He readjusted the box in his arms before he turned around towards the front door, his reaction giving you a bit of relief. He was just happy for his brother, and didn't appear to be overthinking your own relationship, like you couldn't stop doing.
Naturally, you worried about nothing. You were both perfectly content with the way things were. Feeling silly for even being nervous in the first place, you followed him to the front door and stopped him before he left.
"Hey, wait," you said from the door, causing him to turn around just as he was about to descend the stairs. "How about a kiss before you go?"
He grinned and, dropping the box in a chair by the front door, reached forward with both hands to cradle your face and pulled you towards him, his lips pressing firmly against yours. Your fingers gripped the front of his T-shirt as you sighed contentedly against him, his usual scent of gunpowder, sweat and something uniquely him filling your nostrils. You opened your mouth and licked gently at his lips, causing him to smile and slide his tongue alongside yours with a quiet groan while one of his hands released your jaw to get tangled in your hair. He gave your head a gentle tug backwards in an attempt to get you to open your mouth wider, but when a soft moan escaped your lips from the sensation, he felt himself stiffen in his jeans. He pulled you back further so you lost contact and he looked down at your flushed face, his hands still in your hair and on your jaw.
"I'll take these later," he said huskily, nodding to the candles next to the door as he walked you backwards inside the house.
"No, no, you have to take them now," you giggled as his mouth latched onto your neck. "He needs them before Maria gets home." He growled against your skin and begrudgingly pulled away, his eyes raking up and down your body before he stepped backwards.
"Don't move, I'll be back in ten minutes," he told you, grabbing the box and jogging down the steps. You laughed and closed the door behind him, wondering why you let yourself get worked up over nothing. Everything was great between you, you were never more sure of anything in your life. In the back of your mind, you knew you had to figure out why you had such a negative reaction to the thought of marriage in the first place, but you decided to put that off for another day.
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"Can't believe you didn't tell me, you little shit," Joel teased with a smirk the minute Tommy swung the door open. He pushed his way into the house and glanced around quickly to make sure Maria wasn't there before turning back to Tommy.
"Heard you needed some mood lighting," Joel said, raising an eyebrow when Tommy ruefully snatched the box from his arms.
"Yeah, thanks," was all Tommy could manage, his nerves getting the best of him the more time passed.
"Nervous or somethin'?" Joel asked his brother as he casually took in the half-done scene he was setting in the living room. Candles were randomly dispersed throughout the room and two empty wine glasses were placed on top of the mantle.
"Yeah, I'm fuckin' nervous, 'course I'm nervous, shit," Tommy said as he raked a hand through his hair and got to work sifting through the box.
"Well, it ain't like she's gonna say 'no'," said Joel in a poor attempt at easing his brother's nerves.
"Don't matter. I gotta do it right. It'll mean a lot to her, she's probably got some fantasy in her head already 'bout how it'll go. I can't screw this up," Tommy said as he pushed past Joel to balance more candles on the bookshelf.
"Nah, you're overthinkin' it, they just like the ring so they can show it off," Joel replied, thinking back briefly to the time when he was engaged before the outbreak. Amy hardly cared about the effort he put into the proposal, but her eyes lit up like a Christmas tree when she saw the huge diamond he picked out.
"Oh, brother, you couldn't be more wrong. Your own girl told me I need to do somethin' thoughtful. Somethin' romantic. Shit, you're lucky you got me before you swiped the biggest rock you could find and think that'll be enough to make her happy," Tommy grinned as he nudged Joel's shoulder playfully, making his way back into the kitchen to pick out a bottle of wine.
Joel chewed on his lower lip and cracked his knuckles before scratching his beard, his eyes flicking around the room, lost in thought, while Tommy began to light the candles. Tommy noticed the sudden silence and paused, straightening up and raising an eyebrow at his brother.
"You already got a ring, don't you?"
Joel met his gaze for a moment before clearing his throat and running a hand through his hair.
"I've had it for months," Joel admitted, bringing his thumb and pointer finger up to rub his eyes.
"Holy shit, Joel! Why didn't you say anythin'?" Tommy exclaimed, walking over to clap his brother on the back.
"I don't know. You never said anythin', either," he said with a shrug.
"Well, when are you gonna do it?" Tommy asked, turning back to light the candles, grateful for the distraction.
"Don't know. Never seems like the right time," said Joel as he picked up the bottle of red wine Tommy placed on the mantle, scrutinizing the label. "And it's a good thing, too, seein' as I need to rethink how I'm gonna ask her, apparently."
"Yeah, well, one of these days I can ask Maria for advice, if you want," Tommy said, brushing his palms on the sides of his jeans as he made his way to the window, peering out to make sure she wasn't coming home early. "Least I could do, since I got help from your girl."
"Yeah, maybe," Joel replied as he distractedly ran his palm over his mouth.
"Alright, get the hell out of here, I gotta change and put the flowers in a vase before Maria gets home," Tommy said, pushing Joel towards the front door. He opened the door but Joel paused, turning around quickly and enveloping Tommy in a rare, quick hug.
"Congrats, brother. She's gonna love it," he said, gesturing vaguely around the living room. Tommy grinned and nodded.
"Thanks. Now leave, I mean it," he said, giving Joel a shove. Joel laughed and shook his head.
"I'm leavin', I'm leavin'," he said with a wave over his shoulder. He shoved his hands in his pockets as he made his way slowly down the street.
He was telling Tommy the truth about the ring. He hadn't gone out looking for it, but one day, months ago, when he was on patrol with Eugene, he just happened to see it. They had been exploring an abandoned shopping mall, and when he walked by the jewelry store, he had glanced inside at the broken glass display cases and spotted what he thought was the perfect ring for you. It was an oval diamond set on a delicate, white gold band. He had picked it up and examined it thoughtfully, imagining what it would look like on your finger. He briefly looked at the other choices, and none of the others seemed to resonate with him the way that one did. So he pocketed it before Eugene noticed he was lingering, and hid it in an old shoe he had in the closet when he got home.
When he first came home with the ring, he couldn't stop fantasizing about how he would ask you, what he would say, what you would say. But he hadn't been in any rush to ask, and he hadn't really thought about it much after that, he just knew he wanted to spend his life with you. He had almost forgotten all about it until you told him about Tommy's plan earlier that day. But now that his brother had him thinking about it again, the idea of officially making you his and calling you his wife made him feel excited.
He walked through the front door and kicked his boots off before he made his way down the hallway and into the kitchen, where he saw you drying some plates and putting them away. You glanced over your shoulder when you heard him enter the room before turning back to your task.
"Little longer than ten minutes," you teased. You were drying your hands on the dish towel when his arms snaked around your waist and he buried his face in the back of your neck. You squirmed, his grip loosening so you could turn around and gently circle your arms around his neck. "What took you so long?"
He shrugged and leaned down to press a chaste kiss where your neck met your shoulder.
"Just got to talkin'," he murmured, pressing another kiss in the same spot. You hummed and tilted your head to the side a bit, closing your eyes.
"I was thinking, maybe we should throw them an engagement party," you whispered, trying to stay focused as his lips brushed along your neck, his scruffy beard giving you goosebumps. "I can ask Carrie to help, she loves that kind of thing."
"That'd be nice," he mumbled in agreement, flipping his head in the other direction so he could continue his torture on the opposite side of your neck. "We can have it here."
"Yeah," you sighed as you shifted your weight, trying to ignore the ache growing between you legs. "I thought we could - "
You inhaled sharply when he pinched the skin of your collarbone between his teeth, leaving an angry red mark there. Your fingers found their way into his dark curls, gripping them tightly as your breathing became shallow.
"Hm?" he asked, hiding his smirk against your skin.
"Thought we could do it outside," you mumbled, quickly finishing your thought.
"Whatever you want," he said, his voice gravelly as he pulled you into him roughly, earning a small yelp from you. His lips latched onto yours, softly humming against your mouth, the warm exhale from your nose fanning gently over his face. You pulled away, breaking the kiss as he began slowly walking you backwards towards the stairs, his eyes dark as he stared you down.
"Maybe Julia's class can make decorations. I think Maria would like that," you said breathlessly, gazing up at him, meeting his heated stare. "What do you think?"
Joel gave you half a smirk when the backs of your legs bumped up against the lowest step.
"I think you better get up to bed right now before I toss you over my shoulder and do it myself," he said lowly, sending a shiver down your spine.
A playful grin spread across your face as you turned on your heel and raced up the stairs, Joel following hot on your trail, taking them two at a time.
You barely pushed the bedroom door open before his hands were on you, eagerly skirting over your hips and up your arms before coming to rest on your jaw, cradling your head in his hands tenderly as his tongue slid between your lips, reveling in your warmth. Being with you always felt like home to him, it was where he was always meant to be.
"So beautiful," he mumbled against your mouth before he pressed his lips against yours again, his fingers gripping your head a little tighter, like he was afraid you would float away.
Your fingers deftly worked on undoing his jeans as he continued to walk you towards the bed. Just as you were about to reach below his waistband, he scooped down to pick you up, your legs instinctively wrapping around his hips, clinging to him as he softly placed you both down.
He lifted his head up a fraction to look down at you underneath him, his thumb gently stroking your cheek, looking at you with admiration. His eyes flicked up to the open closet door, the urge to confirm the shoe with the ring in it was still in its rightful place, that you hadn't accidentally found it.
"What is it?" you asked him breathlessly, noticing how his attention had been stolen away. He quickly brought his gaze back down to you with a sly smile.
"Nothin'," he said with a shake of his head, then leaned down to part your lips again with his tongue, curling his fingers along the back of your neck, deepening the kiss with slow, leisurely licks inside your mouth. Your fingers danced over his broad shoulders for a moment before you made your way down his chest and stomach, pausing to gently rake your nails through the coarse hair at the top of his boxers, then plunging down to wrap your hand around his stiff cock.
He groaned softly into your mouth when you gave him a squeeze, his hips shallowly thrusting forward into your hand as you stroked him up and down.
"Slow down," Joel gasped, tearing himself away from your mouth and flexing his fingers around your wrist, stopping you. "Wanna take my time with you tonight," he drawled, taking your hand away and pinning it lightly into the mattress.
"Joel," you whined, lifting your hips up from the bed, frustrated. He tutted and shook his head.
"Don't worry, I'll take care of you. You know I always do," he said huskily, his mouth latching onto your neck. "Wanna take care of you for the rest of my life," he added quietly, his voice muffled against your skin and lost in the sounds of your moans. You tipped your head back, your free hand sliding through his thick curls, fingernails raking against his scalp just the way he likes.
He let go of your hand so he could lift your shirt over your head, followed quickly by your bra. Slowly, his eyes swept over your bare chest, his knuckles brushing against your nipple and watching as it perked up in response, then once he was satisfied, did the same to the other.
"So soft," he muttered to himself before diving down and sucking one into his mouth, the tip of his tongue flicking against your nipple before he flattened it against your sensitive skin, licking slow, hot stripes up and down. He lifted his mouth from your skin and blew gently over the wetness his tongue left behind. You gasped at the sensation, your cunt clenching around nothing as he switched sides, giving the same attention to your other breast while his fingers roamed around your waist, then dipped down to squeeze your ass and hips.
You whined his name and tugged on his hair, begging him to touch you, vaguely wondering why he was in the mood to take things so painfully slow, but you were unable to form a coherent thought other than why are my fucking jeans still on?
"Joel, please," you whimpered, pathetically jutting your hips upwards, trying to find friction against him to no avail. He finally released your breast and looked up at you, your chest heaving, hair a mess and your eyes glazed over, already looking completely wrecked. He smirked at the sight and pushed himself up, hovering over you.
"Alright, sweetheart, I'll give you one," he said, much to your relief as his hand came between you to pop open your jeans. He pulled down the zipper and you hooked your thumbs into your belt loops, helping to pull them down as quickly as you could and kicked them off. His eyes glanced down, feeling his cock twitch when saw the dark spot leaking through your panties.
He looped his fingers around the sides of your underwear and pulled them off, then flattened his palms on the insides of your thighs so he could admire the mess he made of you. He ran his middle finger up the length of your seam, testing the waters before dipping inside, marveling at how soaked you were already. His eyes drifted up to your face, mesmerized as you writhed underneath him, your eyes screwed shut and your brows pinched as you focused on his second finger entering your aching cunt.
"Oh, fuck, Joel," you whimpered, snapping your eyes open just to find him already gazing down at you, his eyes dark and filled with want. You rocked your hips forward, trying to make him go faster, but he continued to slowly pump both fingers in and out, in and out, curling his fingertips as he reached inside, brushing against the spot that he knows makes you fall apart.
"That feel better?" he breathed, and you nodded, clutching the sheets in your fist as the fire in your stomach began to burn, the warmth creeping up your chest and neck with every plunge of his fingers. His thumb brushed gently over your clit and you cried out, your body stiffening underneath him as you felt your orgasm steadily approach, your breath coming in short gasps when he finally began to circle the swollen bundle of nerves.
"Faster," you croaked, tipping your head back, but he shook his head and continued his torturous pace.
"It'll feel better this way," he said, and you groaned. "Do you trust me?" he asked, and you brought your head back down so you could look at him again.
"Yes," you whispered, watching as his eyes lit up and a smug grin spread across his face.
"Then let go," he ordered. You inhaled sharply as you felt your walls clench down and your release drip down his fingers, your orgasm slowly ripping through you with a strangled moan. You reached out and grabbed his wrist when it became too much, your body relaxing onto the bed and your eyes fluttering shut.
He slid his fingers out, earning a hiss from you before he popped them into his mouth. You opened your eyes weakly as you watched him suck his fingers, his other hand palming his erection over his jeans and looking down at you panting beneath him, his gaze dark.
"I need more," he murmured as he shimmied down the bed to settle his face between your legs, his hands sliding up your shaky thighs to pin them down to the mattress.
"Wait, Joel," you told him breathlessly. "Too soon, I - it's too much," you said, pulling feebly at his hair. He ignored you, too lost in his own thoughts, the fantasy of making you his and calling you his wife consuming him.
He licked a stripe through your folds, his tongue plunging inside briefly before taking another long, slow drag. You wiggled under his hold with a gasp, your body involuntarily trying to squirm away from overstimulation, but his large hands pinned you down as his tongue probed further inside you.
He knew he was pushing you to your limits, but he couldn't stop. He felt like a man possessed. He alternated between licking and nibbling at your sensitive cunt, trying to avoid your most sensitive area until he knew you could handle it. Only when he finally felt your legs relax under his palms and heard your breathy moans of encouragement did he venture up to press his tongue flat against your clit. Your fingers tugged at his curls, his eyes rolling to the back of his head with a moan. He always loved it when you pulled on his hair. He sucked your clit into his mouth, swirling it around his tongue slowly, trying to drag out the pleasure as long as possible.
Tears pricked the corners of your eyes. The pressure building inside you too intense. You felt like you were vibrating, Joel's expert hands and mouth making your body pulse and thrum, your breaths shallow and sharp.
You tried to say his name, but it came out as a pathetic whimper instead. The way he lapped at your fluttering cunt was making you dizzy. You were hyper aware of how rough his facial hair felt on your raw skin, a stark contrast to how soft his tongue felt on your folds. The muscles in your stomach began to clench as you felt yourself rocketing towards your second orgasm.
Joel felt you twitch under his forearm and knew you were close. He pressed his face further into you, thrusting his hips into the mattress to find some relief while he sucked and nibbled on your swollen clit, your moans morphing into high pitched cries, fingers frantically grasping and slipping through his curls.
Your back arched off the bed, tears trickling down your cheeks as you fell over the edge, your body jerking underneath him while you screamed his name. His hands clutched your legs, trying to keep himself attached as he worked you through it.
He finally pulled back with a gasp when you managed to writhe away, desperate to give your trembling body a break, completely overwhelmed. You each panted for breath as you stared at one another for a moment, your legs still shaking from the aftershock.
"Christ, Joel," you rasped, your voice hoarse as you wiped your tears away with the back of your hand.
"Sorry, sweetheart," he said, running a hand through his hair before wiping his mouth, his gaze softening as he took in your wrecked state. "Can't get enough of you."
"I can see that," you teased, the corners of your mouth turning upwards into a smirk. Your eyes flicked down to his pants, noticing his cock straining painfully against the denim. "Come here," you whispered, beckoning him with your arms. He grinned and quickly pulled his shirt over his head before kicking off his boxers and jeans. He crawled up the bed slowly, hovering over your body. You ran your hands gently over his arms, sending a shiver down his spine, before grasping the back of his neck and pulling him down for a deep kiss. He moaned against your mouth, his lips gently massaging your own while his tongue gave you a taste of your arousal.
"Are you sure you can handle it?" he asked, looking down between your bodies where your hand was directing his cock to your entrance.
"We're gonna find out," you said with a sigh, feeling his thick head notch against you. He pushed forward and you gasped at the familiar sting of being stretched open. Your nails dug into his shoulders as he pressed on, slowing giving you every inch of him before bottoming out with a groan of relief.
"Fuck," he whispered, resting his forehead in the crook of your neck while he took a moment to just appreciate the feel of you. You wiggled your hips slightly underneath him to get more comfortable as your body relaxed and adjusted to his size.
"I'll never get tired of that feeling," you murmured into his hair.
"Hope not," he said, lifting his head up with a smirk. He held your gaze as he slowly dragged his cock in and out, in and out until your head tilted back and your eyes slid shut, your lips parted as you gasped softly each time he pushed back inside. He nibbled tenderly at your jaw, fucking you with deep, long strokes while your legs wrapped tightly around his waist, pulling him closer each time.
"God, you feel so good," you moaned, yanking his face up and kissing him messily, your fingertips digging into his skin. He kept up the slow pace, savoring the feeling of just being close and intimate, while each powerful thrust caused tip of his cock to make contact with the most sensitive spot inside you, stoking the flames and pushing you to the edge.
"Fuck, I love you so fuckin' much, you know that?" he gasped, his lips hovering above your open mouth as he gazed down at you, watching your eyes glaze over with each slow drag, in and out. "D'you - shit - d'you see what you do to me? Huh?" He gripped your jaw when he saw your eyes begin to flutter close, fingers pressing into the soft flesh of your cheeks. "Look at me, sweetheart. Need you to look at me," he begged, his climax quickly approaching but he refused to pick up the pace, enjoying the slow way he was fucking you way too much.
"Yes," you whispered, forcing your eyes open to give him what he needed. He nodded, loosening his grip on your jaw and letting his hand fall limply. He looked down, watching as his cock disappeared inside you and coming back out, coated in your slick. He groaned at the sight and glanced back up at you, your gaze still transfixed on his face, just as he asked.
"Can't believe you're really mine," he muttered to himself in disbelief with a small shake of his head, his eyes roaming over your face and chest. "Can't believe I'm the one that gets to fuck you."
"I'm yours," you whimpered, biting down on your lower lip as you felt your body begin to tense up, like a band ready to snap.
"Yeah?" he asked hopefully, his wide eyes locking back onto yours. He knew you didn't mean it the way he wanted to hear it, that it was just something you said in the heat of the moment, but he didn't care. He allowed himself to have the fantasy, anyway.
"Just you, only you," you babbled, knowing exactly what he liked to hear. He clenched his jaw and took a deep breath, fucking into you a little faster now.
"Keep talkin', just like that," he said through gritted teeth, his arms wrapping around your ribs as his hips snapped into you, eliciting a low moan from your throat.
"N-nobody else, all y-yours, only want you," you rambled before the band snapped and your vision went spotty. You cried out and clenched down around him, the intensity of a third orgasm depleting all your energy and almost immediately, your muscles went slack.
"That's right, good girl," Joel said, watching you fall apart under him. "All mine. Mine - mine - mine!" he grunted, each word punctuated with a harsh thrust before pulling out just in time to come all over your stomach, watching in a daze as each burst of his hot spend coated your soft skin.
He collapsed next to you, both struggling to catch your breath. Your arm draped over your eyes and you contemplated falling asleep just like that, not even sure you had the strength to stand anyway. After a moment, he reached over to his nightstand to snatch up a handkerchief, and he gently cleaned you up as your breathing stabilized. Gingerly, he lifted your arm away from your face, brushing his thumb over your cheek, then your swollen lips before pressing a soft kiss to your forehead.
"Wow," you whispered hoarsely, finally opening your eyes. He chuckled and nodded in agreement.
"Yeah, wow," he said, laying back down next to you. "That was somethin' else," he added, rubbing his palms roughly over his face.
You rolled onto your side, wincing at the soreness in your legs and hips already, and draped an arm across his body.
"Where did all that come from?" you asked sleepily, nuzzling your face into his chest. He shrugged.
"Don't know," he lied as he rubbed small circles across your back. You hummed, accepting his response without a second thought. His eyes drifted back over to the closet briefly before reaching over and turning off the light, tugging the sheets over your bodies and resuming the circles on your back until he heard your breathing slow, confirming you were asleep.
He stared in the dark at the ceiling, thinking about how and when he should ask you to marry him. He didn't want to take away from Tommy and Maria, so he figured he should put it off for a while, but that didn't stop him from closing his eyes that night and dreaming about what it would be like to be your husband.
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Tag List: @chiogarza, @sparklejumpropequeen-777, @shotgun-shelby @partyofone3413 @nana90azevedo @ninaminaromina @untamedheart81 @taz-97 @nastiasnow - lmk if I missed anyone or if you want to be removed
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554 notes · View notes
vanilladove · 8 days
Note
hiii hello vani<3 may i request smt angsty with dazai and reader in which he’s acting neglectful/unfaithful as a partner and you just deal with it? but you don’t hate him or anything you’re just really sad about it hehe tysm ╰(*´︶`*)╯♡
☾⋆.ೃ࿔* ghostin
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gif creds fybugoustraydogs | divider creds benkeibear
₊ ⊹☁ pairing: dazai x gn!reader
₊ ⊹☁ genre: angst :,)
₊ ⊹☁ content warnings: distant/neglectful relationships; canon mentions of double suicide bc dazai lol...i couldn't bring myself to write a cheating dazai i'm sorry T~T inspired by ghostin + better off by ariana grande!
₊ ⊹☁ word count: 1.9k
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You shivered under the cold sheets when your alarm had woken you up. The space next to you was empty, your lover nowhere to be found.
It had been like this for months now, but it was nothing new due to the nature of his job. Dazai always became distant right before handling a new enemy for the Armed Detective Agency. He only disclosed vague details to you, explaining that withdrawing himself was a way to protect you since he didn’t want enemies knowing about you. Before leaving, he’d muttered something about keeping you away from “the demon”.
But you had to admit, the feeling of being 'safe' from a far away, unknown enemy didn't compare to being wrapped in your lover's arms, the soft kisses on your forehead, gently running your hands through his brown fluffy hair, and whispering sweet nothings to eachother. You missed his corny jokes and the nights you two would have together after drinking too much sake, giggling on the floor and watching the stars on your open balcony—Dazai always pointing out the constellations and telling you the stories and lore behind each one.
He had been staying at a secret location far from your shared apartment, so the sheets didn’t smell like his musky, warm cologne anymore. The space felt ghostly now, and hanging out with your friends barely helped. Stirring a sugar cube and cream into your morning coffee, the things they said repeated in your head.
“Just break up with him..."
"You don’t deserve someone who ignores you—especially if he puts work above you…”
"He's definitely cheating on you with all the travel he's always away on..."
Your friends didn’t understand though. They didn’t understand the depth of your relationship or how Dazai loved you. He was a reserved man; he didn't let anyone into his heart, always putting on a flamboyant front to mask his true self. Even becoming his partner and finally moving in with him was a feat in itself and was something he'd hesitantly accepted. You knew he had a traumatic upbringing and that the ones he cared for eventually left his life, often in a tragic way; the last thing his broken heart could take was losing you.
Which was why you put up with the cold sheets in the morning, the single serving meals, and all the sad movie nights alone—because deep down, you knew he cared about you. Your lonely conscious couldn't handle any other explanation.
You tiredly shaped the triangular onigiri filled with snow crab and placed it in the wooden bento box, along with some tamagoyaki and salad, savoring the momentary heat in your hands. It was Dazai's favorite lunch—something you used to pack for him everyday. You forcibly dragged yourself out of bed to make it for him after receiving a text—from an unknown number, of course—that he was stopping by the apartment to grab something. You knew it was futile waking up early; it wouldn't stop him from leaving with no explanation, from not being targeted by the port mafia, the hunting dogs, or "the demon". How silly and lovesick you were.
Closing the lid, you put the dishes in the sink and placed a piece of bread into the toaster, staring intently as you waited for it to finish, which seemed like forever. You took a sip from your mug, cringing when the lukewarm liquid touched your tongue. Shit, your coffee had gone cold. That never happened when he was still there.
The lock clicking snapped you out of your somber thoughts, and you turned your head around to face the self-inviting visitor. Gaze softening, you admired the tall man in front of you, wrapped in a tan trench coat, which you instinctively slipped off from behind him, his tense shoulders relaxing under your fingertips as you draped the coat on a nearby chair. Wordlessly, you both exchanged melancholic glances before Dazai made the first move, stepping forward to close the space between you two. His slender fingers slowly came up to caress your face, the foreign touch making your cheeks heat up. Leaning forward, he closed his eyes and placed a soft kiss on your cold lips, "Hi, bella."
Forcing yourself to open your lids again and not overindulge in the much needed contact, you smiled at your lover, but it didn't quite connect back to your eyes, "Welcome hom—errr—back...You needed something from here, right?" You replied, choosing your words carefully so he couldn't hear your evident desperation.
Dazai blinked carefully, "Yeah, a flash drive. It's in one of the kitchen cabinets. Is it fine if I look around for a bit?" You nodded, looking down at the tiled floor and smiling at nothing. Dazai was always like that, hiding important things in the most impractical places as a precaution. As he fished through the cabinet, he turned his head briefly to look down at the abandoned mug sitting on the counter, "Is that for me?"
You wiped the nostalgic grin off your face, reaching for your coffee, which you'd made in Dazai's usual mug, "A-Ah, no. It's mine, sorry," Dazai raised an eyebrow at you, "I made it earlier this morning, but it's cold now. I'll make you some more." You offered, trying to brush off his suspicions and the strange looks he was giving you.
He sighed, stroking your hair lightly, "It's fine, darling, brew yourself a new cup, and I'll drink this one." He gave you one last reassuring pat before picking up the mug and slipping away into your shared room to look for something else, giving you no time to protest. What seemed like a sweet gesture really had a double meaning: I'm not staying long enough for a new batch of coffee, so I'll just take the cold cup.
A pit formed in your stomach as you dumped out the used coffee filter and reached for a new one. Your vision started to blur, stopping you before you could open the lid of the coffee grounds. Wet drops falling on the back of your hands made you realize you were crying. Instinctively, you brought your hands up to cover your mouth and block any sobs from Dazai, who was still next door in your bedroom.
Stop it.
You tried to coerce yourself, but you couldn't help it. The despair was too agonizing; to have the one you needed most close to you but not being able to tell them to stay, to hold you, especially since you knew how precious you were to him—if you asked, he'd drop everything to stay the night with you. Everyone at the ADA was aware of that, which was why they'd sat you down and conveyed that you couldn't dote too much on Dazai. You understood that and had stayed by his side anyways, knowing that being with him sometimes was better than never. Even if it broke your heart in the process. Even if it meant crying silently in the kitchen while your lover was in the next room, oblivious to the tears wetting your sleeves.
Deep down, you wished he would notice the pain you were in. You wished he would text and call you more or at least take you out to dinner and do special things when he'd finally come back, but he always resumed your daily routines almost like he'd never left. It made your heart ache, feeling like he disregarded his long leaves and their effects on you. You sniffled quietly and quickly wiped your tears away upon hearing rustling from the bedroom doorway signaling that Dazai was almost done grabbing what he needed.
Inhaling deeply, you breathed in and out slowly to calm your frantic heart and turned to the side to face the counter as your partner walked back into the kitchen.
"Found what you were looking for?" You asked, trying to cover your face with your hair and sneakily wipe away any residual tears.
Dazai swiftly passed by you, going towards the chair to slip his trench coat back on and grab the lunch you'd made him. "Yeah, I found it. Thanks for the bento and coffee by the wa—" Your eyes widened as he trailed off mid-sentence, all of a sudden feeling his presence next to you. He bent down to peer over at your face, evidently still swollen and a bit red from crying.
He rotated your body towards him and pushed the stay hairs from your face, intently observing your features. "Bella, have you been crying?" He stroked your cheeks delicately, "And your eyebags are so dark...have you been getting enough sleep?" He looked genuinely worried, peering into your eyes for any sort of insights, but it was too hard to maintain eye contact with him.
"I'm fine...I—" You muttered, words trapped in your throat.
Tell him you miss him. That you don't want him to leave you again.
No, don't! Let him walk out as usual. Your sadness isn't worth letting a countless number of innocent people get harmed or killed.
Thoughts conflicting and wearing your tired soul out, you only mustered a weak smile, placing your cold hands on top of Dazai's. "If I died now, would you still die with me?"
"What?"
"You promised we'd commit a double suicide together. Would you still—" Dazai's arms wrapped around you, pulling you into him, his warmth and comforting scent making tears fall again, not knowing the next time he would be back. You cursed yourself internally for breaking down in front of him, but you couldn't hold your emotions in any longer. He only held you silently, running his hands through your hair as you sobbed into his chest. You felt lightheaded, crying for several minutes, the only condoling things being the scent of Dazai's cologne and the way he held you to remind you he was still with you.
You looked up from his chest, gazing into his chocolate brown eyes, which were swirling with uncertainty. A pained expression was on his face, no doubt from your actions. "I'm sorry, my love. I'm so sorry..." He lifted your face up to kiss your lips gently and kiss away your salty tears before pulling you back into his chest. "I was selfish to think you wouldn't be hurt by me always being away. I tried to turn a blind eye to focus on work, but..." He exhaled shakily, "...somehow I always hurt the people closest to me...even the one I love the most."
Dazai squeezed you tighter in his arms, "I love you, and I know we'll get past this, darling. I don't expect you to forgive me, but please, please don't think of resorting to that." He cradled your face, forcing you to look up at his broken eyes.
This was the power you had over him. Prison, criminals, and even the mafia couldn't break him anymore, but your tears could melt his gaudy, confident facade instantaneously and bring him to his knees. Exactly what everyone warned you about.
You nodded slowly, the last of your cry session being wiped away by Dazai's thumbs. You hugged him back, listening as his rampant heartbeat went back to normal, staring off to the side.
"Listen, bella, I'm going to be gone for a few months. I suspect I'm going to be arrested and sent to a high-security prison...probably somewhere overseas. We won't—we won't be together for a while." You heaved, holding your breath, "But," He turned your head to face him, "I'm going to stay here for a couple of days until then. Is that okay?"
Before you could think, you crashed your lips on his, and Dazai only happily kissed back, smiling, grateful to have cheered up his love again.
"Y-Yeah, that's fine. I love you, Osamu." You sniffled back. He could stay forever if he wanted to, but you'd take a few days.
"I love you, too, bella. I always will, even when I'm not with you. Enough for the both of us."
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lustfulslxt · 7 months
Text
Taking of the Virginity - Matt Sturniolo
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summary : you and your best friend, matt, decide to lose your virginities to each other.
warnings : are we paying attention here? helloooo, sex.
a/n : another one of my ao3 stories <3
matt and ari were home alone at her house. her parents were on a little anniversary trip and matt's brothers were too busy to hangout. so, the two just did what they normally did; went on a walk, watched movies, scrolled through tiktok, and played games. they didn't have to do much to have a good time with one another.
"wanna spend the night?" ari asks her friend of 6 years.
"i would love to." matt smiled at her.
the two kicked back on the couch, music playing on the tv and they just talked and vibed with one another. matt was sitting normally, and ari was laying across the couch with her head on his lap as he played with her hair.
"let's play a game." she speaks.
"what game?"
she thought for a minute, "hmm. i don't know."
"you don't know?" matt repeats, laughing. "do you at least know what kind of game you want to play?"
"nothing that involves getting up. i'm comfortable." she grins up at him.
"like what? ispy?" matt teases.
ari scoffs, playfully rolling her eyes, "that's actually a great game while you're tryna be funny."
matt just giggles at her, but agrees nonetheless. "how about 21 questions?"
"we know quite a bit about each other already, but i'm down."
"we don't know everything." matt points out.
"i didn't say everything, matthew. i said quite a bit." she retorts, "you go first."
he ponders for a moment, "what do you wanna be when you grow up?"
ari gives matt a look before bursting into a fit of giggles. just the sight and sound of her laughing, matt can't help but join in, especially since it was a silly question.
"when i grow up, i want to be an artist. you know this, matty."
"i don't know what else to ask!" he exclaims in defense.
"we do know everything about each other." ari concludes.
matt sheepishly rubs the back of his neck, avoiding eye contact as he states, "well, not everything."
"what's that supposed to mean?" she asks, raising an eyebrow.
"um, well.."
"spit it out, matthew."
"i can't!" he explains, "it's kind of dirty i guess."
"like sexual?" she questions, to which he nods. "do you have something you want to ask?"
after what felt like forever, matt finally caves, "are you a virgin?"
ari pauses, quite unsure of how to answer that. "i don't really know."
her response threw matt off by a lot. either you've had sex or you haven't. what's there to be unsure about?
"okay, now i'm confused. what does that even mean?"
"well," she starts, sighing, "there was this one time where i guess we started to, but he was making me really uncomfortable and being rough, not caring that it was my first time, so i made him stop."
realization then dawned on matt's face. that's why her and her ex boyfriend randomly broke up, she never wanted to talk about it so everyone kind of just let it go.
"basically, he was inside me for a minute. but neither of us finished and we didn't actually do anything, so i don't know if i'm still technically a virgin or not."
"do you want to be?" matt asks her.
her eyes widened, suddenly feeling a little self conscious. "wait! it's my turn!"
matt sighs, before putting his hand out and gesturing for her to proceed.
"are you a virgin?"
"you can't ask me the same question!"
"why not? i wasn't shown a rule book where it said that. were you?" she retorts, squinting her eyes as she knew the answer.
"well, no, but." matt pauses, before giving in as he knew she'd keep pestering him. "i am a virgin, yes."
it wasn't that he didn't have the chance to lose it, he just didn't want to. well not that he didn't want to, he just didn't want to with the girls that gave him the opportunity.
"really?!" ari shouts, extremely surprised at his revelation.
"why do you sound so shocked?" matt asks, defensively.
ari shrugs with a little grin, "you just seem like you've already had sex."
"i don't even know what that means." he laughs at her.
"why haven't you had sex?" ari asks him, "you've had girlfriends before, and i know at least one of them has wanted to."
matt shrugs, "i don't know. they didn't really pique my interest like that."
"who does?"
matt just looked at her. he could not answer that question. not because he genuinely didn't have an answer, but because the answer scared him and would most definitely scare her. the person who piques his interest is her, his childhood best friend. for some reason, the only time he can see himself having any kind of sexual relations with someone is if it's with her, which blows his mind because he knows it would never happen.
it was just something about her though. and sex wasn't just sex to him. he doesn't think he could just have sex with whoever. sure, the pleasure is there, but he feels there's more to it. like there's a connection that is more than just pleasure, he needs that. saying that, maybe that's why he could only ever picture it with her; because they've got a strong relationship and they love each other.
he clears his throat, "i get to ask 2 questions, since you did."
ari rolls her eyes with a smile on her lips, but still shrugs.
"if you could do it right now, would you?" he asks her.
"i guess it depends." she responds, honestly.
"on what?"
"depends on who it's with."
ari knew exactly who she would give herself to if she could. matthew. he was always so soft and gentle and loving with her, she knew he would be the same in bed. finding out he's also a virgin, made her want it even more. not only was he also inexperienced, but she could be the first one to make him feel good. not that she would ever get the chance, seeing as they're only friends, but it was wishful thinking. and now that the thought has entered her mind, it wouldn't leave.
same goes for him.
after a moment, matt speaks up again, his voice slightly nervous. "what about with me?"
ari couldn't help but stare at him with wide eyes and her mouth agape. she couldn't tell if he was just teasing her or if he was being serious.
"sorry, i didn't mean to make you uncomfortable. i don't want it to be weird or anything, i just thought—well i don't know what i thought. i guess i was just thinking that, maybe, since we're both virgins, we could lose it to each other. but if that's weird, just forget about it." he rambles on.
ari was still stunned, not expecting the suggestion in the slightest. once she recovered from the shock, she stood up from the couch. matt's stomach dropped, thinking he just ruined everything between them. however, ari just reaches her hand out to him.
since he only sat there, looking at her unsure, she says, "do you want to go upstairs with me or not?"
he almost leaps off the couch, grabbing her hand and following her to her bedroom. both of them were nervous, yet excited. once she shut them in her room and locked the door, she turned to face him. the two stood there kind of awkwardly.
"um, so how do you want to do this?" she asks him.
"ari, if this is uncomfortable for you, we don't have to do anything. i promise, it's not a big deal. i won't be mad, we'll still be friends. it's okay."
"no!" she quickly blurts out, her cheeks flushing with color at her outburst. "i really do want this."
both of them knew this was something that should come easy and not feel forced, and it didn't feel forced, but they were both scared to make the first move. that was until, matt stepped closer to her.
he grabbed her hands, interlocking their fingers, and as he stared into her eyes for any sign of hesitance, he leaned closer to her and asked, "can i kiss you?"
ari felt her breath catch in her throat and only now realized that this is something she's been longing for. she wanted matt in a way that she was now getting, it felt surreal. to answer his question, she gives him a nod, and with that, he softly grabs her face with one hand and places his mouth on hers.
the two moved in sync, their lips lapping one another's perfectly. matt placed his other hand on her lower back and pulled her closer to him, their bodies flushing together. ari's hands move towards his neck, playing with his hair. their kiss soon turned more heated as he licked her bottom lip for entrance, which she gave him. their tongues fought for dominance, matt won and began exploring her mouth with his tongue.
they were blending so perfectly. this was something the both of them had been yearning for and they couldn't get enough. matt pulled away from her, slightly out of breath. their lips were plump and red, saliva coating the both of them.
he placed his forehead on hers, "are you sure you want to do this?"
"i promise you i've never been more sure of something." she swears.
he nods, and his hands find the hem of her shirt. "would you mind if i took this off?"
she smiles at his nervousness and thoughtfulness, pulling her shirt over her head before grabbing his hand, "matty, i want you to have all of me. as long as you go easy, i'm yours."
"okay. just let me know if, at any point, you want to stop. and will you be vocal with me? not saying like put on a whole pornographic show, but can you tell me what you like and what you don't?"
ari giggles at him and nods, pulling him closer. she plants a soft kiss on his lips and looks him into his eyes. "i promise i will tell you what i do and do not like. so long as you do the same."
after he gives her a nod of agreement, he walks her over to her bed. he softly pushes her down, then pulls his shirt off, and the two stare at each other.
ari couldn't help but blush under his intense gaze. she felt a little self conscious, only ever being in this predicament once and it went completely opposite of the way she wanted. however, matt's stare gave her butterflies and made her feel good. she felt beautiful under his eyes and he hadn't even commented on her appearance.
matt couldn't help but admire her. there she laid, in nothing but little shorts. her hair was spread out over the bed and she looked up at him with a bashful smile. her boobs were bare and laid perfectly on her chest, her nipples hardening with every second. she was a masterpiece and he never wanted to forget was she looked like. he was mentally taking thousands of pictures, in hopes of remembering her this way forever.
ari felt cold and bare, so she hooked her fingers through his belt loops and pulled him on top of her. the two laughed a bit together, and matt couldn't help but stare at her some more.
"what?" she asks with a slight frown. "do i not look right? we don't have to do this if y-"
matt cut her off with a deep kiss. he kissed her like it was the last time he'd ever see her, like he was putting every ounce of love he's ever had into it. it left her breathless when he pulled away.
"ari, baby you are so fucking beautiful and there's nothing more that i want right now, than to make you feel good. but i'm gonna take my time and admire you along the way. okay princess?"
her face turned beet red and she couldn't help but pull him into her, smashing her lips on his. everything about him was turning her on. not just her body, but her soul. his scent, his smile, the way his eyes sparkle when he looks at her, the way he kisses her so passionately as if he can't breathe without her, the way his touch feels like it's burning her skin in the most satisfying way.
matt pulled away from their kiss and moved his face to the crook of her neck. his lips trailed soft open mouth kisses up and down her neck, causing goosebumps to flare on her skin. she couldn't help but let out soft quiet moans, basking in the tenderness of his lips. just the sound of her whimpers and heavy breathing was enough to get him rock hard.
his head moved lower and lower, showing love to her boobs. he squeezed and sucked and tweaked her nipples, leaving dark purple and blue bruises on her skin. the feeling of his mouth on her had her panties already drenched, she couldn't help but buck her hips up into his.
matt's hands were roaming up and down her body, squeezing in all the right places. he was taking his time with her, softening her up and making her as comfortable and into it as he could.
"can you take off your pants?" ari asked him, a blush washing over her cheeks.
he looked up at her with a grin and kissed the corner of her lips, "yeah. do you wanna take yours off too?"
she nods and they both take their bottoms off, leaving them bare naked. ari crossed her legs to hide her core, somewhat self conscious as it's her first time being with matt this way. she couldn't help but watch him as he slowly stroked himself, he was very big and hard.
matt then opens her legs, giving her soft kisses on her navel. "you don't have to be shy, baby."
her stomach was in knots, twisting in anticipation. she was still a little nervous, but she wanted it so bad. matt continued to kiss lower, his mouth now working on her inner thighs. he could see her arousal dripping from her pussy and his mouth watered at the sight.
"you're so wet for me." he grinned up at her. "can i taste you?"
she quickly nods, her hands running through his soft hair. the second he places soft kitten licks against her heat, she can't help but grip his hair. he then pushes his whole tongue flat against her, wiggling it up and down.
"oh wow." she moans out, "mm, it feels really good."
her words only encourage matt and he keeps going, devouring more and more of her. his tongue laps her folds, sucking every bit of her. ari was trembling underneath him. her grip on his hair was tight and she couldn't help but push him more into her pussy.
"you taste so good, i could eat you forever." he moans against her, the vibrations going right through her.
she was soaked, from her own juices on top of his saliva, it was like a slip and slide. while matt focused his mouth on her clit, his hand travels up her thigh, massaging along the way. her eyes looked down at him, feeling his hand go further up. they held eye contact and he paused, making sure she was comfortable with it. when she gave him the green light, he brought his hand closer to her entrance.
she was a moaning mess underneath him, her legs were shaking and her hips were bucking. he dragged his middle finger up and down her folds, causing her to let out another breathy moan. while his tongue worked on her sensitive bundle of nerves, he slipped his finger inside her. she slightly jerked as he moved it in and out, clenching around him. she could feel her climax coming soon. matt continued to pump his finger, adding another after a few moments.
"does this feel good?" he asks her.
"yes, matty." she moaned out, her toes curling. "i'm so close."
he could feel her legs tightening around him, one of her hands gripping his hair while the other gripped the sheets beneath them. she was now simply melting away into a puddle.
"cum for me, darling." he says to her, his voice holding a light rasp to it. "i want you to cum in my mouth."
she felt like all the breath was sucked out of her, in the most blissful way possible. her legs stretched out, tightening enough to get a charlie horse. both of her hands were in his hair again as she pushed his face more into her core. she was trembling under him. full moans were slipping from her lips as she released.
matt watched in awe, absolutely in love with the way she looked. how she quaked and quivered, involuntarily shaking from the pleasure coursing through her. he enjoyed every drop of her, licking and sucking all of it up.
"do you wanna taste?" he asks her, his tongue wrapping around one of his fingers.
she bashfully nods, pulling him up to her. she placed his middle finger in her mouth and sucked. he could feel his dick twitching at the sight alone. as soon as she pulled his hand away, he smashed his lips on hers. their kiss was heavy and rushed, both of them tasting her on their tongues.
"do you still want to..?" he asks, trailing off.
he knew she just had an orgasm and didn't want to push her if she changed her mind about doing more.
"i promise, matt." she assures him once more. "i want this. i want you."
with that, he was back over her and between her legs. he lined himself up with her entrance, looking at her for approval again. with an exasperated sigh, she pulled him into her, hard. she didn't want to wait anymore. she's given him confirmation multiple times, and she appreciates his need to constantly make sure she's still okay with it, but she just wanted him so bad. 
a sharp gasp left her mouth as he pushed himself further in, it felt like she was tearing. he stopped about halfway, letting her adjust. after a moment, she gave him a nod for him to keep going. matt let a groan slip from his lips once he was fully buried in her pussy. she was so hot and wet, and the fit was tight.
"oh my god." he shudders, already wanting to cum. he took a deep breath before continuing, "let me know when you want me to move."
only a short moment later, she whispered, "okay, im ready."
his thrusts started off slow, and his hands traveled from her hips up to her face, cupping it as he plants soft kisses on her lips. he could feel her moans against his mouth, showing him that he was doing it right.
"faster." she moaned out, her legs wrapping around his waist.
he didn't want to just obliterate her, well he did. but he wasn't going to, he knew to control himself. he interlocked their hands as he picked up the pace. he was thrusting in and out of her so perfectly, both of them couldn't help the moans that escaped their mouths.
"you feel so good wrapped around me." he moans out, his hands squeezing hers.
"i love when you talk like that." she smiles, breathless from pleasure.
"oh yeah?" he smirks, his hands finding themselves on her boobs, squeezing them tenderly as he slightly quickened his thrusts. "do you like this? do i make you feel good?"
hearing matt speak to her like this, when he's fucking her the way he is, had her stomach twisting. she was so euphoric right now. she wouldn't want this any other way, everything was exactly right.
"yes, oh fuck!" she moaned loudly, "right there, matty."
"let go, baby. just let go." he whispers against her lips.
he continued drilling her exactly the same, knowing that would drive her over the edge. and it did. she was practically convulsing below him. her face was contorted, her eyes squeezed shut with her eyebrows furrowed. her mouth was hung open, moans spilling out left and right.
"good girl."
he kissed her deep. she looked so beautiful to matt, and the sight of her orgasming, brought him to his edge. he couldn't help it, his dick twitched and hot spurts of nut shot into her. their juices blending together as he continued pumping in and out of her. both of their breathings were heavy once he finally pulled out. he slowly flopped down next to her, both of their eyes connected.
"oh my god." ari whines. "that was simply the best thing i've ever done. thank you."
matt giggles, "it was perfect, but you don't have to thank me."
"no, honestly. you were perfect. you were so loving and gentle, you cared about my satisfaction. you checked with me multiple times. it couldn't have been better, and i appreciate the way you fucked me."
both of them were giggling now. matt pulls her closer, his body wrapping around hers perfectly. he put his lips on hers, kissing her soft and passionately.
"i don't want to make things weird, but is this gonna change anything?" he asks her.
"do you want it to?" she responds.
"would you hate me if i do?" he stares at her so intensely. "i definitely don't want you doing this with anyone else."
she let out a loud laugh, pulling him in for another kiss. "i'm all yours, matty."
he smiled, brightly, and planted another kiss on her lips. "good." another kiss. "and i'm yours." another kiss. "and i promise i will get plan b for you in the morning. sorry, we didn't use a condom."
surprisingly, ari didn't even care. she was just happy with everything that took place the entire night. it was definitely something she would never forget, and something she couldn't wait to experience again. over and over.
a/n : not proofread, what's new? i've got one more one shot on ao3 and it's chrissyy pooh <3 please keep sending requests! i live for this shittt. like fr, i'll do whatever bby
427 notes · View notes
half-bakedboy · 2 months
Note
for the buck/tommy prompts — “you’re an idiot.” “yeah, but i’m *your* idiot.”
A few months into dating, Evan asks Tommy to a family dinner at Sergeant Grant and Captain Nash’s house. Tommy’s never been nervous when meeting a significant other’s family or friends, but he sure as Hell is terrified to meet Evan’s pseudo-parents. 
You know, the ones Tommy hijacked his own helicopter for because they saved an entire ship of people from being murdered by pirates, blown up, and drowned in the middle of the ocean where they’d probably never be found?
It didn’t matter that he had met them before. How is he supposed to feel normal about meeting two people like that? 
“I can practically hear you spiraling, and I feel like that’s supposed to be my job,” Evan interrupts his, well, spiraling. Tommy turns toward him from the driver’s seat with furrowed eyebrows. 
“I’m meeting your entire family together for the first time. How is this about you again?” Tommy asks. Evan must know he means well because there’s a soft smile on his face and he reaches out to grab Tommy’s hand. If he was a lesser man, they might have been shaking. He feels like he might start when Evan’s face turns more serious. 
“You know I haven’t had the best track record with women…” Evan begins.
Tommy can’t help but interrupt. “Good thing I’m not a woman…”
“Not a woman, I know,” Evan finishes the inside joke with him. He’s running his thumb in soft circles over the back of Tommy’s hand, spelling out words Tommy wishes he could decipher. “You’re different in more ways than that, though.” 
Tommy doesn’t speak even though Evan expects it if the long pause he allows says anything. 
“You might not be part of the 118 right now, but you’re as good as family. You’ve worked side-by-side with Hen and Chim, you were part of the first team that Cap led in L.A., and your friendship with Eddie has only grown since we got together.” Evan sighs. “I’ve always been terrified of not being enough so I’ve pushed people like you away. People who I respect, who I envy, who I wish I could be like so that they can’t replace me.” 
“No one can replace you, Evan,” Tommy inserts, even though he knows he doesn’t have to. Evan knows that, but Tommy will never stop reminding him. 
“No, they can’t,” Evan says confidently. Tommy squeezes his hand with pride. “But that makes this—us—all the more serious to me. You’re sticking around for as long as we’ll have each other, and probably after that.” Evan takes a deep breath and, with vulnerability bursting out of his blue eyes, says, “I guess, this is my way of saying that I want you in this family whether you’re with me or not.” 
Tommy practically melts at the words. It’s what he’s wanted since he first hopped in that helicopter, since before his friendship with Eddie or his relationship with Evan. He’s missed Hen and Howie, and he wants to laugh with their wives about stories from their pasts. He wants to get to know the first Captain he met who deserved to be in his position, and say thank you to the first cop to shake his hand when he finally—and accidentally—came out in a fit of frustration. 
Evan knows exactly how much the sentiment means to him, and to hear him say it out loud, makes emotion swell up in his throat. He knows it’s too soon to talk about forever, but he’s never felt something so close. 
“Plus, if they’re your family, too, they can’t be mad at me for not telling them I was bringing you because the invite was implied.” 
With the moment thoroughly broken, Evan jumps out of the car and runs around to open Tommy’s door. Tommy sighs as he exits, but reaches out to hold Evan’s hand anyways.
“You’re an idiot,” Tommy mutters with a shake of his head. 
There’s so much fondness in the words, that he might as well have said I love you. 
Evan’s grin barely falters, and he kisses Tommy’s cheek quickly but firmly. “Yeah, but I’m your idiot.” 
It’s not an I love you, too but one day, Tommy thinks it might be. 
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axnrxn · 1 year
Note
if you're comfortable with it; 141 team (+ maybe konig/alejandro) accidentally hurting their partner??
Accidentally Hurting You (141, Alejandro Vargas, and König x GN!reader)
Dark fic, angst and some fluff (varied ratios depending on the character), declarations of love
TW: Angst, ptsd, mentions of graphic violence, war stories, mentions of death/blood.
Simon “Ghost” Riley
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You wake up at the sounds of whimpering from the man next to you. Simon has been having vivid nightmares since Las Almas. You felt helpless, you hated seeing him suffer. You got hurt and it’s haunted him ever since.
“Simon” you whisper softly, gently touching his cheek.
Suddenly, his eyes snapped open and he crushed your lingering hand in his own. You yelped from the excruciating pain.
“It’s me, baby, it’s me!” You yelled, unable to hide the immense pain you were in.
Finally, Simon’s fearful eyes were transformed by guilt.
“Shit- fuck. I’m so sorry, love. Fuck” His voice broke, finally realizing what happened.
“It’s okay, babe, I’m here.” You repeated it like a mantra, attempting to soothe him and yourself at the same time.
Your hand throbbed, but you didn’t attempt to move it just yet. His hand began to shake, his breath ragged. Then he sat up quickly, letting you collapse onto the bed where he once was under you.
“Fuck- I… M’sorry, love. Fuck.” He whispered, unable to look you in the eye before rushing out of the bedroom.
Finally, the pain in your hand set in. You let the tears fall silently, the throbbing in your hands too intense to ignore. It was best if Simon didn’t see you like this.
You stifled your tears and left your room as well, deciding to get an ice pack to soothe the pain. You saw Simon on the couch, arms resting on his knees, hunched over. You could hear his sniffling as you reached into the freezer for ice.
You sat down next to him and slowly draped your arm behind his back. He tensed, freezing under your touch. But then his shoulders slowly dropped back down. He still avoided your gaze, his head in his hands.
"I'm sorry. 'M gonna keep hurting ye, love. That's all I do, hurt people. Hurt you." His voice was small and breathy, like he struggled to push out enough air.
"This isn't your fault, Si. It isn't who you are, you're just hurting. And you'll keep hurting if you don't believe you can stop. You'll get there. It just takes time, baby." You assured, maintaining your composure as he broke in front of you.
You crawled into his lap, under his hunched form, and buried your face into his stomach. You felt his tears pelt your cheeks as you laid under him, keeping your eyes closed as the storm passed. You spared him from your gaze, knowing that it would only push him further over the edge. Finally, the rain on your face ceased, leaving quiet sniffles and shaky sighs above you.
"I don't think 'm gonna ever be okay. I don't know why you're with me." He said quietly.
"I'm going to be with you forever, Si. I know what you've been through, I would never expect you to be okay 100% of the time." He looked at your hand as you spoke. "And that's okay. I'm strong, too. I know what I've gotten into. Let me be strong for you, you're not alone in this anymore." You finished your mini pep talk by taking his hand in your injured one, doing your best to ignore the twinge of pain that the contact initiated.
He sighed and leaned back, pulling your hand to his heart. "I don't deserve you..." he said, slowly regaining his composure.
"Because I love your ass, obviously." You teased, trying to lighten the mood.
He grumbled a bit before letting your hand go. "I'm gonna get you a new ice pack and some Advil." He said, standing up from the couch.
"And I love you too," he added as he walked away.
"I love you more than anything, Simon Riley." You whispered to yourself. But you knew he heard it.
Johnny “Soap” MacTavish
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Shrapnel from one of his blasts hits you
"Fuck, love, 'm so sorry." Soap apologized breathlessly above you, chest heaving from running to you so quickly.
"'M okay, Johnny, it was an accident. Just shite luck," you grimaced, pressing harder on the gash in your side. It had just missed your ceramic plates, entering your side where there was only soft material protecting.
"I shoulda made sure you were far enough, fuck, I thought you were, dammit" he scolded himself as you bled.
Ghost had begun to use his emergency medkit to patch you up, no longer concerned about enemies nearby as Johnny's blast had wiped a pretty large area. It would take at least 15 minutes before any reinforcements arrived, so stopping the bleed temporarily would be the goal.
Johnny finally bent down, shielding you from the sun as he took your hand that had previously pressed into your wound.
"'M sorry for this, love. Eyes on me while L.T. patches ye, 's gonna hurt." He demanded, keeping your hand firmly in his.
"Good news, Soap, 's just a bit of shrapnel, nothing major. Just a nick, lots of blood, though." Ghost announced. "Sorry about this, (c/n), ain't giving ya pain killers til we're outta here. Need you sharp." Ghost said, before you felt your side light up in pain.
You couldn't help crying out, Soap immediately provided his sleeve for you to bite down on.
"Shh love, yer doin' so good." Soap's accent thickened, comforting you. His voice always making you feel safe.
You closed your eyes, focusing on the sound of Soap's voice rather than his words as he attempted to talk you through it.
"Good job, (c/n), it's over. Ye did good, it's okay." Soap said, finally getting your attention.
You sighed, feeling your side throb. You didn't look, feeling Ghost place medical tape over some gauze. Soap grabbed your arm opposite the side of your gash and supported your entire weight as he stood with you, his hand around your torso. You leaned into his neck as much as you could, trying to steady yourself as your blood loss finally reached your head.
"I got ye, love. Lean on me. L.T.?" Ghost grabbed your other arm, slinging it across his own shoulders, crouching to make sure he didn't force you to extend to his height and pull on your wound.
Soap leaned his head towards your ear and whispered "I ain't gonna let anything happen to ye. I love ye so much, 'm dyin' before you, dammit."
You smiled a bit at his silly promise at the end and replied "I love you, too, Johnny," with your remaining energy. You can't remember what happened after that.
Kyle “Gaz” Garrick
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"Fuck! Dammit, they got (c/n)." Gaz shouted into his comms.
You leaned on Gaz's shoulder as he dragged you through the narrow side streets of Amsterdam.
"(c/n), how copy?" Price asked you through your earpiece.
"Pretty shite, Captain," you replied through gritted teeth.
"Get (c/n) to the car with our cartel friend, Gaz." Price ordered.
"Copy" Gaz replied as he readjusted his grip on you.
You could see him poorly hiding the stress on his face, his eyebrows furrowed as he tried to drag you towards Price and Laswell.
"I'm gonna get you out of here, (y/n). C'mon, just a bit further." Gaz urged, talking to himself more than you.
"Fuck, I'm sorry, Kyle." You panted, struggling to stay semi-upright as the blood loss blacked out your vision.
"Stay with me, (y/n)" Gaz pleaded, letting you fully rest your weight on him.
Noticing you were on the verge of passing out in the street, Gaz picked you up bridal style and continued making his way to the car.
"Talk to me, darling. Anything. Say anything, keep your eyes open."
"Mmm , can't" you groaned into his shoulder.
"C'mon, you can do it," worry lacing his voice as he attempted to pick up his pace.
"Well, I love you lots. And I'm not hungry anymore," you declared, not fully coherent.
He laughed a bit at your last remark, "I love you, too, darling."
"I'll marry you when this is all over, promise." you said, fully a puppet to your subconscious.
"What was that?" Gaz said, not able to process your words. Then it hit him.
"Well, shit, I'd better ask you when we get out of here, yeah?" He said, finally in range of the car with Laswell and Price.
John Price
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Gets you shot by not calling your shot in time
You grasped your shoulder tightly as you hid behind cover, your back pressed against the rooftop door you had shut behind you.
"(c/n), how copy?" Price asked over comms.
"I'm hit, right shoulder, 0-6," you replied, already using your free hand to rip open your medkit as you bled all over the stairwell.
"Stay put, 2-6, on my way."
You began to strip off your vest, peeling away layers until only your undershirt was left on your top half. You maneuvered around your shoulder, refusing to move it for the fear of aggravating the burning sensation even further.
The lower stairwell door opened, you grabbed your sidearm immediately in your functioning hand.
"Just me, (c/n), stand down." Price announced, knowing you were a sitting duck after being shot from your perch.
"Fuck, John, what were you waiting for? I could've taken that shot, why'd you wait so fucking long?" You asked breathlessly, frustrated with your captain.
"Laswell ordered it, not me, love. I'm sorry, at least let me help you out of here." Price replied, his voice low. His eyes were filled with guilt as he got closer to you. "I've got Gaz on the lower entrance, so I've bought us some time. Let me have a look at you." He assured, wavering between captain and partner mode.
His personalities blurred together, it was both a command and a loving insistence. You loved his commanding nature, but hated it at the same time. How you felt both like his soldier and his partner. It made your stomach do uncomfortable flips.
"He got me good, right through my shoulder." You said, scooting towards him to give him a better look.
Price studied your shoulder for a minute, inspecting the entry wound and looking behind you for an exit wound. After wiping away the copious amounts of blood, he located an exit wound. It wasn't too bad considering you'd been shot by an enemy sniper. You got lucky.
"Just clipped the top of you, luckily. Took a chunk, but didn't make a big hole." Your captain stated.
His gaze softened as it met yours. "I'm sorry about this, love. I am so sorry. It's on me."
"We've all got our orders, yeah? You couldn't do anything." You tried to reassure him, but he wasn't having it.
"I shouldn't have waited for the call. I should've made it anyway," he muttered, starting to focus on patching you up enough to escort you out before you lost too much blood.
"Well, you're here now to piece me back together, at least. I expect special treatment when we return to base, Captain." You teased, causing Price to shake his head, amused.
"You'll be getting bed rest, love. What more could you want?"
"Breakfast in bed, obviously," you replied coyly.
"I'll see what I can do, then." He said with a laugh.
"John?"
"Yeah?"
"I love you."
"I love you too, (y/n)."
König
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You rolled around the grappling mat with König on top of you. You straddled his waist, attempting to lift his right arm to slide your foot under it and roll into an arm bar. His strength threatened to topple you over as he bucked his hips, attempting to throw you off balance. Eventually, his attempts succeeded.
"Ahaha, yes! I've got you now!" He declared excitedly. His thighs caged you, long enough to engulf your entire torso, as his hand pinned both your wrists above your head, effortlessly.
Your pride bubbled within you, refusing to tap out. You began to struggle under König's weight, unable to even move him an inch as all 200+ pounds pressed onto your middle.
You huffed, kicking your legs wildly and trying to twist onto your side to throw him off of you. You didn't want to lose again. In one of your twists, you succeeded to turn to your side, but failed to throw König off. His weight was shifted entirely into your side, causing you to yelp.
"Scheiße! I'm so sorry, liebling." König panicked, immediately getting off of you like you were the most fragile piece of glass and he had just cracked you. You could see the panic and guilt in his eyes immediately as he assessed you.
"Fuck, I'm okay, 's my fault." you hissed, your pride wounded anyway. You wanted to curl up into a ball.
"Liebling, you can't keep going like that, I don't want to hurt you." König insisted, still too afraid to touch you.
"I just can't keep fucking losing, I can't be weak." You whispered, frustrated and on the verge of tears.
"And you won't be. That's why you train with me, ja? I'm the strongest, so if you beat me, you beat everyone." König assured you in a matter-of-fact tone.
You knew he was right, but it still stung. You felt like you didn't have enough time, which just made you want to train with the goal to win rather than to learn. He sensed it, so he finally mustered the courage to lightly brush your cheek with the back of his hand.
"I'll make sure you're safe, liebling. Always. Are you okay to try again on me?"
"Yeah, but can you just hold me for a bit?" "Ya, of course."
You scooted your back towards his chest, his arms and legs completely encircling you as he let you curl into him.
"I love you, König," you mumbled into his sleeve.
"I love you, too, liebling," he replied, resting his cheek lightly on top of your head as he hugged you tighter.
Alejandro Vargas
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"Again." Alejandro ordered.
You turned back to your target, firing your sidearm. You barely hit the target last time, but this time, you completely missed. You huffed in frustration, dropping your clip and reloading it with a new one.
"I can't fucking do this, Ale." You complained, starting to feel tears well up in your eyes.
"You can and you will, cariño." He reassured you, his eyes hard with determination to push you to success.
"I fucking can't!" you shouted. "I just fucking can't anymore." Your voice broke as the tears flowed.
His eyes softened as he noticed he pushed you too far. He quickly made his way towards you taking the gun from your hands and setting it on the table beside you.
"Hey, hey, look at me. You could do it before, so you can do it again." He said softly.
You hadn't been able to shoot properly since breaking your wrist and receiving a concussion from a particularly nasty car accident you were in while chasing narcos. You were lucky to be alive and to have only escaped with the injuries you did.
"But what if I can't? What if I'm permanently fucked up, Ale?" You asked, unsure if you'd ever fully recover.
"Then you're fucked, cariño. I need you to try for me. I need you to be able to defend yourself again. Las Almas is no place to be defenseless, yes?" His voice was serious, low and demanding.
"Fuck, I know." You replied.
"So come on. Again,” He ordered, only this time he positioned himself behind you, guiding your stance. He widened your feet and turned your shoulders, his hand stablizing your wrist with one hand as he peered over your shoulder.
You pulled the trigger. You hit nearly directly in the center.
"See? Just need to get back into it." Alejandro smiled at you as you turned towards him.
"Thank you, Ale. I love you so much," you professed, your eyes glossy.
"Te quiero también, cariño." (I love you too, sweetheart.)
A/N: Sorry for the delay! I'm taking a lot of exams and working on some quantum physics total wavefunction equations (aka crying over math about an electron that literally no one cares about). I'm taking care of the requests in my drafts before I work on my draft of the fic from the poll.
If my Spanish is terrible, I’m sorry. I’m still learning, so if I fuck up just let me know how to fix it.
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monarcascension · 9 months
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louder than bombs | y.h
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summary : You and Yunho’s relationship was a complicated one. But not as complicated as the relationship you both shared with Choi San, your “ex” and his ex-best friend. After ending things with him years ago, you and Yunho embarked on a situationship of your own, however things between you begin to spiral out of control putting your relationship in danger. Will your feelings for each other help you salvage what you have? Or will you lose him forever?
pairings: jeong yunho x fem!reader
tags: MINORS DNI, nsfw, smut warning, unprotected sex, asphyxiation, guided masturbation, domxsub, creampie, violence, blood warning, vulgar language, sensual language, sex talk, rough sex ♡
*DISCLAIMER : This story is mainly for entertainment purposes. This is not a representation of the artists themselves or their actual personalities and is only created to be a work of fiction. Their actions are only for storytelling and literary purposes.*
[ AVOID SPOILERS — READ PART 1 HERE ] ㋛㋛㋛
[ User Tags: @simeonswhore @hopetiger10 ]
word count: 13K
——
Regret was like a vicious toxin. Eroding you from the inside out until there was nothing left other than the thought of what could have been. Desperate clings to the paths you chose not to take prior. Ever since San, you lived with many of them. You wished you never met him. You had a desire to rewind time and make it so he was never a part of your life to begin with. You were tired of being tangled in all of this pain that his selfishness had caused you, but you loathe yourself for letting it get this far.
Now to add onto the declaration list of your compunctions, you stood in disbelief from what you just let slip out of your mouth to the man you had previously shared a piece of your heart with.
“I…I think I fell in love with Yunho.”
The sentence looped in your head; echoing like bats trying to echolocate their way through a dark cave. Those were words that you never thought you would ever utter to yourself, let alone anybody else. You swore free from the spell of “love” or whatever those feelings meant to you, and kept them under a stiff lock and key even from Yunho who you had grown into this semi-functional situationship with. The two of you, however, had a deal. You both were aware of what you were stepping into when you decided to share a bed that night—making it clear that feelings would never be involved in what you had. It kept things from being complicated between you— the one barrier that protected you both from one another, from the disappointment that could be brought on from any physical adventure— had been ruined because of you.
Because you decided to fall in love yet again.
Your heart was thumping so roughly against the cage of your chest that it was beginning to pierce skin. Your forehead was moist with beaded sweat. You wiped it away, curious to know if it was from the immoral activities the two of you had just finished, or from the anxiety you felt at what his response could possibly be. The silence was too much for you to bear so you cleared your throat, hoping to subtract from the awkwardness.
All you could hear was his rough, ragged breath intermingling with your broken sighs. You were too scared to look at him, afraid of what might reflect back at you if you did. The sudden need to explain yourself arised, feeling it to be your responsibility to mitigate whatever hurt you had just caused. But what could you possibly say to fix everything? Words weren’t enough in this instance.
Your brain finally cleared from the high you were on, giving you full autonomy over your thoughts. “San I-” You stammered, but a hand and a low tone hushed you within moments.
“You… love him?.” His voice was calm, but his words were harsh. Deserved at the least. “So, why did you kiss me? Why did we just do anything that we just did?”
The last thing you ever though you would do if you saw him again was fuck him the first chance you got. You believed that it was the guilt of knowing that you could never love San the way he wanted you to. Engulfed in the inability to properly explain what it was that you felt with words, you said with action. Though, it may have been the wrong action considering the circumstances. The realization that the two of you never shared a real emotional connection and could only communicate through physical means was the main source of your confusing relationship with him. One thing you learned however was that sex didn’t always mean love or an invitation into something serious. Sometimes sex was just that. Sex. Sometimes it was a physical love letter. Sometimes it was a goodbye.
You wished you would have discovered that sooner rather than now.
You swallowed a clump of saliva in your throat and moved away from the door that you both were propped up against. “I’m sorry. I can’t give you what you want, San.”
San scoffed at that comment. “You can’t? Or you’d rather give it to someone else?”
You bit the inside of your cheek, running your fingers over your forehead like you were trying to make sure your brain was still there and functioning. “This was a mistake.”
You paced the bathroom floor. The words sounded more heartless and cruel leaving your mouth than it sounded in your head.
You fetched your phone and purse that clattered to the floor and tucked them underneath your arm, striding over to the bathroom sink to fix whatever damage your look had undergone.
Your lipstick had smudged a bit because of the inopportune display of affection, and you quickly fixed it with a facial wipe that was tucked inside the depths of your bag. You readjusted yourself; affixed your dress straps back into place and refluffed your hair until you looked a little better than you had moments ago. It wasn’t the same but it would do for now. The final touch was just masking the scent of sex that was practically etched into your skin with the perfume that you always carried with you. Your hair would hide the light bruise on your neck that San left from canvassing your flesh with his mouth.
“Wow.” He sounded hurt. You could not blame him. “ A mistake, huh? So, you're saying you still felt something for me— was that a mistake too?”
“Look, this is too complicated for either of us. It always has been, and I think we have collectively had enough complicated relationships to last us a lifetime.” You inhaled with a sharp breath. “Let's just end it. Once and for all—on a good note this time.”
“No, this isn’t complicated for me.” San stood to his feet now, tugging on the dress shirt he had on to straighten it back out again. “This is complicated for you.”
“I don’t want to fight about this, San. Just drop it.”
He continued anyway. “Am I wrong? You’re confused. You don’t know what you want! Who you want.”
You didn’t bother to look at him directly, only stared at the silhouette of his figure in the corner of the mirror. There was a noise rising in your throat, breaking through your closed lips and out into the air. You started to laugh.
“What? You wanted me to choose you? After everything you put me through.” You chuckled again. “You’re out of your damn mind. I’d rather be with someone who actually knows how to love me.”
“Love you?” San snickered. “You don’t know Yunho as well as you think you do, if you believe he’s actually capable of loving you. Believe me when I say, he’s not the guy you think he is.”
You almost gave yourself whiplash from the force of the twirl as you turned to look at San, shooting an incredulous look at him. What was that supposed to mean? You’ve spent years being around Yunho and he was just as sweet and gentle as he had always been. He was caring and open and.. you wanted to believe that the stream of affections that he had shown you came from somewhere deep down. Came from him possibly loving you. At least you hoped.
“And you think you’re better? You think you know everything, San, but you don’t. We didn't want any of this, it just h-”
“Happened. Right?” He finished your words like they were his own.
The two of you stared at one another. You could feel the heat rising to your face, your skin– although burning with the anger that was manifesting– felt cold.
“You say you love him and he loves you, blah blah blah, but what do you think he’ll do when he finds out what happened between us?” San said with a sneer.
All you could do was stare at him for a moment. Your eyes darted around his figure wildly, trying to reveal whatever secret meaning was behind his words. Or was it a threat? You tried not to think of that possibility as you turned back to face the mirror, focused on the goal that you were trying to achieve. You heard some minor shuffling from behind you, but paid no mind to it. The bathroom door squeaked open with a shrill, and you awaited the moments that the door closed, telling you that San was gone, but it never came. There was the loud chatter from outside where the rest of the party was, and the classical music being played from the live band.
Then he spoke again. “I was really hoping things would be different between us this time, but I guess you chose the wrong guy to love, again. Right?”
You paused for a moment, sitting on the last words that San left you with before he walked out of the bathroom— leaving you completely and utterly alone. Again. That simple word stung you more than you were willing to admit; feeling almost uncomfortable in your own skin as the sentence dug deeper into your flesh causing you to writhe and shift in place. However, he was right.
What did you really know about love anyway except the part of it that hurt the most? How would you know if Yunho was really even the right one to love you in the first place? What if you couldn’t love him as you say you did? Stuck in the perpetual cycle of pain all over again because of an inadequacy that you lacked within yourself. You loved San once, didn’t you? Wasn’t everything you put yourself through with him for the sake of love? Or was it something else? So many questions clouded your brain, it was overwhelming. You could not answer them all at once, for the answers never offered themselves to you in the first place.
Everything you thought you knew, came crumbling down in a matter of seconds, leaving a wake of unregistered feelings and unsolved emotional turmoils.
You spent the better part of the last four years in anguish over San. That night you found him in the arms of another woman, haunted you. The words “I love you” hurt you more than they healed you, carving a wound so deep in your heart that you felt it would never mend itself. You despised those words, and could never bring yourself to say them. Questioning yourself on what love really is all over again.
플래시백
You loved Seoul Forest Park. In fact, other than Namsan, this was the park you visited more frequently. It was more peaceful. Your sacred place. However, this is the first time you came with someone else, and the atmosphere was just as calm and serene as you had left it months ago. The trees dance in a contemporary style swaying elegantly in the wind, telling a story of their place in this reserve. The leaves shuffled against one another, forming the instruments for the performance; since it was coming upon the Spring, they were just as bright and healthy as you could have hoped. The sky was a pale blue, brushed with sparse, but fluffy clouds overhead. The sun hid its blinding rays behind the tufts of white that passed over it, protecting both you and Yunho from the unforgiving heat.
The two of you were sitting at the pond, surrounded with beautiful stone tablets. Some of them even crossed the water like a small bridge. Yunho was skipping rocks that he found nearby, while you watched a family of ducks run across the stone with its brigade of ducklings. One of them fell into the water clumsily. You smiled more happily than you usually would have at the sight as the other babies attempted to stick their stout beaks into the water to help their sibling up. The mother took notice and tried to see what the commotion was about. You giggled a bit to yourself, but possibly louder than you thought. Yunho perked up and followed your gaze to find the source of your laughter.
“Have you ever had a duck before?” He asked you, quite randomly.
You turned to him with raised eyebrows, but readjusted to engage in the sudden conversation. “No, not as a pet, but.” You thought about it for a moment, trying to recall your childhood. “Since I used to live by a bigger lake, we saw a lot of ducks come and go. My dad and I used to feed them together.”
“They’re funny little things, but they always seem to be on the move— never stay in one place too long.” There seemed to be something that Yunho wanted to say, but he wasn’t sure how to say it. So, he continued. “I used to have one named Oli. I feel like he only used me for my bread, but he was a real pal. I think I missed a Summer seeing him since I was inside playing video games most of the time, and he was probably expecting me to come and feed him, but I forgot… never saw him again after that. I wonder where he is now.”
You closed your eyes and sighed, shaking your head in that same disappointed manner you always did and laughed against your will. “Maybe those are his kids.”
Yunho grinned and laughed, considering the possibility. “Maybe, but those ducks don’t have his feathers.”
You chuckled and sighed all in the same breath. “It feels so easy for animals to just pick up and move on after being disappointed. I’m jealous of Oli.”
Yunho smiled at you for a moment. His gaze shifted towards the grassy slope you both sat on, twiddling with the blades at his side. “Yeah, I probably really let him down, but I don’t think it’s that easy for them to move on. When you spend a lot of time in one place, you get accustomed to it. If I was Oli, I would like coming home to that nest or that pond everyday, but then have to pick up and move again every winter? That’d be so bothersome. So, if I was used to getting fed at one house and then have to find another? I’d be pretty pissed.”
You thought about his words, piecing together whatever analogy he was trying to prove in your head. You looked over again at the family of ducks only to find them now swimming in the pond together.
Yunho spoke up again after clearing his throat. “What I’m trying to say is: moving on isn’t easy for anyone or anything. It’s a process, and it takes time. Maybe Oli was disappointed in me for not being there, but overtime, I know he found something else. He never stopped moving just because he was hurt by someone.”
Your eyes stayed latched on the duck family that paddled around the lake in a circle. Always moving and still enjoying it. You let a deep breath escape you. “Moving on can be lonely sometimes, though. At least they have each other.”
Yunho nodded, looking out at the vast sea of green grass and trees on the other side of the lake. “It can be. Nobody said you always had to do it alone, though. Birds and ducks and things like that, they're not always alone when they move down South. They always have people that love them by their side, so why can't we?”
You glanced over at Yunho, looking at the small squint in his eyes as he gazed up at the sky; trying to shield himself from looking directly at the sun that was beginning to peak from behind the clouds. His once pink hair had now faded into a light blonde, blowing messily across his forehead. He caught your gaze and stared back at you. That goofy grin pulling at his lips as you turned away shyly; the both of you sharing a brief laugh.
“What?” He asked. “You were staring at me first. I can't look at you?”
“It’s not that.” You chuckled, pulling your lips into your teeth for a moment. “Just trying to figure out when you got so philosophical.”
“There’s a lot of things about me you don’t know.” He started moving closer to you. His hands reached up towards your face and used the knuckle of his finger to brush a stray piece of your hair from your forehead.
You only watched him, being sure to not make any wayward movements. His eyes searched your face intently, trying to glean some kind of answer from you. “The one thing you should know though, is that I’m always going to be here with you.”
His fingers caressed down your cheek, stopping at your chin. That same, singular finger tilted your head upwards and pulled you into a soft kiss. Your relationship with him was still confusing, but you never questioned it. It was merely yours. No one else's. No one had to define what you were. You just… were.
Your lips curled up into a smile once Yunho backed away from you. You brought your knees up to your chest and hugged them, rocking yourself over to the side until you landed flush against Yunho. Your head tucked just underneath his chin. He adjusted himself closer to you and wrapped an arm around your shoulders, planting a kiss on the top of your head.
The two of you didn’t say anything else while you sat there engulfed in one another. Ever since that night the two of you shared, Yunho had not left your side. Of course, he would still give you the space you needed, but when the two of you were together. It really was just the two of you. When he held you like this, you took in the comforting fragrance he had on— smelling similar to apple— and would fall into him with ease. Yunho always possessed this calming energy about him and that's always how you felt. You loved and cherished every moment you spent with him.
There was a warmness growing in your chest. That deep, bleeding, gash that San left on your heart slowly began to close.
계속하다
You had to find Yunho. Your mind slipped the fact that he had miraculously disappeared into the thicket of the party. Jamie also had to be confused as to where you went, considering you had been gone for almost twenty minutes with no correspondence. You checked your phone as you exited the bathroom, hoping for something. Jamie had texted you asking where you were and you quickly responded, telling her that you simply got lost in the magnitude of the hall. But nothing from Yunho.
I’ll undo the lie later. Sorry, Jamie. You said to yourself, clicking off the device and stumbling back into the party. It was just as lively as you had left it, but urgency filled the air instead of the fun you were promised. All you wanted to do was find Yunho and get out of here, and put this whole shit show behind you. So, you continued your search. This time, you called out for him.
You searched the perimeter first. You only found big wigs with their companions sitting at round dining tables with their share of dinner and drink. The ballroom floor was not as crowded now as many had found seats to sit in and were engaging in conversation elsewhere, giving you enough space to trek forward without bumping into anyone.
“Yunho!” You called out, fruitlessly. No answer. You searched amongst the semi-sparse group in the area. Seeing no familiar faces yet. The live band was drowning you out this close up. It would be impossible for anyone that happened to be out of earshot to hear you.
But then a voice called out to you. “Hey! Over here.”
You spun around quickly, a few groups away was Mingi. He raised his drink high in the sky so you could see him and his black and blonde streaked hair, and you sighed in relief. Happy to see a friendly face, even if it wasn’t the one you were hoping for. Beside him were Hongjoong and Seonghwa, Yeosang, Jongho. Wooyoung and Veronica were missing and- Your heart caved, but rose again from the elated feeling as your eyes landed on the tall blonde.
“Yunho.” you murmured softly.
You quickly made your way over to them, saying your pardons to those who were in the way and squished yourself between the rather large group of men that you had come to call your friends. “Hey everyone. It’s good to see you, y’all look great.”
“So do you. You look like you’ve been running a marathon, though.” Seonghwa said, looking at the guys.
“Yeah, are you alright?” Yunho cooed softly, more concerned.
No. “Yeah! I was just um… Yunho. I’ve been looking for you, everywhere. We think we’re going to head out.”
“Already?” Yunho looked at his watch. “Why? Did something happen?”
“Well-“
“I hope y’all aren't skipping out so soon!” A voice chimed a little bit away from where you stood. “The party’s just getting started.”
A hand clapped around Yunho and Yeosang’s shoulder suddenly and his head jerked to the side to see San rounding around the man’s tall figure. Wooyoung in toe with a jovial grin on his face. Everyone in the group, including you, shifted uncomfortably where they were standing. They were fine when he was with them earlier, laughing and joking like everything was peachy, but that changed now that you were with them. They all knew.
You and Yunho exchanged brief glances before he rolled his eyes, folding his arms across his chest. “San.”
He sounded agitated; trying to mask it behind that smooth and cool voice of his. You never really questioned him about his relationship with San. Nor did you ever ask him. You knew he always hung around the guys regardless of if he was there, but the only thing you knew about their situation was that Yunho had moved out with Yeosang a few months prior and San, Seonghwa, and Mingi all lived together now.
“Good to see you, buddy! It’s been a while. You look good. Nice suit.” San almost sounded believable, if it weren’t for the fact that you knew he was pissed at both of you.
Yunho looked at you again, and you stared back at him practically mortified. He squinted at you looking for answers.
Is he the reason you wanted to leave? Yunho seemed to ask through eyes alone.
San didn’t even seem to acknowledge your presence yet, but he knew you were there. He only looked at Yunho, who was trying his best to ignore him. Seonghwa stepped forward towards San, placing a hand on his shoulder like he had done Yunho, and spoke low into his ear, trying to tug him away at the same time. San brushed him off almost instantly.
“Nah, Nah, Nah. Wooyoung and I already had a drink. Three, actually.” He said, trying to recount the number in his head. “Oh! I saw Jamie over there too. She did not look happy to see me. Didn’t even say a word. I would have loved to catch up with her. We were friends once, just like Yunho and I. Right bud?”
He smacked him on the back, and Yunho only shifted slightly in his spot. He chewed on the inside of his mouth, annoyed. Upset. The others looked amongst each other, confused at what was going on, but they knew better than anybody.
“Alright, that's enough.” Yunho said, straightening himself, rising to his full height as he shrugged out of San’s grasp. “You’re drunk.”
“Maybe we should get out of here too.” Yeosang chimed up, trying to keep that happy smile he usually possessed. “We have something to do tomorrow morning anyway.”
The group all spoke in agreement with the statement, trying to shift out of the group with San, but he resisted. Suddenly, another body joined the commotion. You looked beside you to see Jamie looking wary of the situation. She looked to you and then Yunho, seeing the visible distress on your faces.
“Where the hell have you two been?” Jamie’s voice was almost in a whisper. “What’s going on?”
“I’ll explain later.” You reached out to Yunho and grabbed the crest of his arm. “Yunho. Let’s just go.”
“It would be really nice if we all had a chance to catch up, really.” San continued. He seemed happy, but his face was just flushed with red and his eyelids lower than before. It was clear that he had drunk much more than he said. But he was coherent enough to cause problems as always.
San finally looked over at you and shivers ran down your spine. He smiled, “You and I did enough catching up. Don’t you think?”
Your stomach turned. Yunho glanced over at you and then back at San. “I think it’s best if you listen to the guys. You need to go.”
“Tell him. We had a lot of fun catching up a little bit ago didn’t we?” San took a step towards you and Yunho quickly intervened. His frame towering over the both of you, and all you could see was the way he glared at San.
The vein on the side of his neck wriggled beneath his skin. San did not shy from him though. Whatever liquor was running through his system had made him brazen and unafraid. The smile that lined San’s face had dwindled like the flame of a candle at the end of its wax. He took one courageous step up to Yunho who kept his eyes on him the entire time. Hongjoong and Seonghwa tried to pull him back. Jongho told him it wasn’t a good idea and encouraged him to leave, but he shrugged off all resistance. Yunho was unwavering in his defense. You anxiously looked between the two of them and your body moved before your mouth did.
“Yunho. Come on, let’s just go home.” You tried to reach out for him again, but Jamie pulled you back, catching you by the arm.
You looked back to see her sternly shaking her head. The people beside you were beginning to gawk in your direction, whispering to each other about the sudden fuss.
San stepped up to him again until they were mere inches apart. “Yunho. Yunho. Yunho.” He mocked. “Everybody just thinks you’re the greatest guy. Jeong Yunho: can’t ever do any wrong. Can he? But they don’t know, do they?”
Everyone looked around nervously. Your palms were beginning to feel moist with sweat. Your heart pounding against your chest; out of its usual steady rhythm. Jamie even perked up at the comment.
“What the hell are you talking about?” Yunho snipped.
San’s hand came in contact with Yunho’s shoulder and he pushed him back with just a few of his fingers. Yunho barely budged, his shoulder falling out of its original place before stiffening back. San took another step. “Tell them.”
Hongjoong stepped in, gripping San’s shoulder. “San, man. Don’t cause a scene.”
San ignored him, shaking free of his hold. “Tell them, Yunho.” San had more bass in his voice now. He pushed him again. The look in his eye was almost evil. He pushed Yunho back again, this time Yunho took a step behind him as he did.
San tried to press him again, but Yunho wrapped his large hands around his wrist, stopping him in midair. You could see the pain lurch onto San’s face for a moment as his nose twitched. Yunho bared his teeth and got closer to him, squeezing his fist around his arm. “Touch me again, and I’ll break your fucking hand.”
“Tough guy. Then you’re brave enough to admit that you’ve been fucking the girl I loved behind my back. All of our backs.”
Yunho looked over to you for a moment. There was a brief panic in his eyes, but he hid it well enough. You wanted to help him, but San was relentless. Still, Yunho said nothing, standing firm against San’s sudden aggression.
“So what if I am?” You shuddered. Everyone’s eyes turned to you suddenly. Including Jamie. You could feel her green eyes burning a hole in the side of your head.
“What?!” Jamie said, “You two- is he serious? Is he telling the truth?”
You turned to her, tears beginning to line your eyes. You couldn’t bring the sound out, so you mouthed “I'm sorry.”
Yunho threw down San’s hand. Seeing him reeling for a moment. “Happy now?”
He started walking away from him, seemingly unfazed, but by the look on his face you could tell that he felt bad for putting the both of you on the spot. Neither of you wanted it to come out this way mere moments from being in your arms again.
San smiled. “Don’t feel too bad, bud. We’re not the only ones who fucked someone else behind someone’s back.” He turned to look at you this time. “Isn’t that right?”
Yunho looked back at him, following San’s mischievous gaze directly to you. Fear overtook you. Your face fluttered with shame as you watched the realization hit him on what happened. He knows. A tear streamed down your cheek.
“Let me tell ya’. She tastes just as good as I remembered-“
A few heavy gasps filled the room. Shocked and frightened shrieks left you and Jamie’s mouths as Yunho’s fist cracked across San’s jaw. Completely knocking him off balance. He was so fast that you hadn’t even noticed Yunho lunge at him in the first place. Before you or the guys could scramble to stop either of them from retaliating further, San was already recovering from the punch. He spat out blood that had gathered in his mouth from the sudden appearance of a cut on his lip. He turned on his toes, dealing back the same blow to Yunho’s face despite his size. The hit was much more vicious, sending crimson spattering across his cheek. But he did not stop. He swung blind again. Yunho was fast but San was faster. He stepped back just in time. The crowd backed away as well, scared of the fight ensuing.
“Guys, enough!” You screamed out but they hadn’t heard you, or they did but just didn’t care.
The two of them were scrapping like they were in the streets. One punch more lethal than the last. The once beautifully polished floor was now ruined with the droplets and spatters of their blood. And they didn’t stop, despite the efforts of their friends trying to pull them off of one another. Yeosang and Jongho grabbed desperately at the back of Yunho’s suit. Seonghwa and Mingi tried to grab San. Wooyoung was in the middle and tried to pull them both apart with the help of Hongjoong, but they didn’t budge. It was chaos. They were yelling and the people were screaming, but drawing closer to see the fight while others fled. Somehow Yunho had toppled over San. He straddled him, dealing blow after blow. San tried to fight back but to no avail. You couldn’t watch this anymore.
You fought out of Jamie’s hold on you and rushed into the middle. You moved Hongjoong aside just in time before Yunho cocked his hand back.
Both of your hands latched around his forearm and you pulled. “Yunho stop!”
Yunho quickly craned his neck back to see who had grabbed him. He was completely blinded by rage that he hadn’t even noticed it was you for a second. His cheek had been cut and was bleeding. His bottom lip was also split and there was a small cut above his eyebrow. His hair was a slight mess, leaving a few strands dangling in his face, stuck to his forehead from sweat.
You reached out to touch his face, brushing across his cheek lightly coming in contact with the blood that was dripping. “Please.”
His vision slightly began to clear as the scowl he had on his face diminished and his breathing slowed. Someone came pushing their way through the crowd at that moment. You were sure someone called the police, but it was a lone woman in a long, gold ball gown style dress. Dark hair fell down her slender shoulders and there was a look of annoyance on her face.
“WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE?!” Veronica boomed.
She looked down at San who was sputtering and laughing all the same, Yunho who was pulling himself off of him, standing beside you weakly. And then over at you. Veronica’s eyes sparked between yours for a moment and you could see understanding in them. Not empathy, but a realization that this was somehow your fault, which wasn’t too far off in hindsight. All you didn’t calculate was that they would start fistfighting in the middle of the ballroom. Veronica moved over to San, dropping even elegantly, beside him to see how badly he was hurt.
Yunho wiped the blood from his lip with his own thumb before turning to Veronica. “Nice party.” He said before slinking away into the crowd that parted ways for him.
You looked down at San who also watched him leave, trying to sit up slowly on the floor with Veronica and Wooyoung’s help. Bright red bruises were all over his face.
“You were so tired of being miserable alone that you had to bring everybody else down with you. Well, congratulations, San. Now we’re even.”
Jamie rested a hand on the side of your arm, pulling you back the way Yunho had gone. “Come on, he isn’t worth it.”
“Yeah… he isn’t.” You and Jamie followed after Yunho, sure not to lose him again this time.
You had never seen Yunho so angry before. You’ve never seen him snap like that much less hurt anyone in the process. Especially someone he once called a friend. He simply just exploded. Your mind was beginning to run with everything you had heard about Yunho up until this point; trying to comb over every moment you spent together to see if you missed something—anything— that could make his impulsive aggression make sense.
There’s a lot of things about me you don’t know.
Believe me when I say: he’s not the guy you think he is.
Did you really miss something? You shook the thought from your mind and continued to chase after him, following his figure as he made his way outside. Jamie called after him, but he didn't stop. His current state was earning him some terrified sideways glances from passersby who were curiously heading inside to see what all the racket was. Yunho had not stopped his trek until he reached the valet who rushed off as soon as he came.
Yunho was pacing back and forth in the still night. The heels of his shoes clicked across the stony pathway as his hands rubbed across his face. You could see now the red marks that were on his knuckles. Some were minorly scraped, but most of them had dark wounds on them. If they would have undergone any more damage, they would have started bleeding even worse. You were happy that you stepped in when you did.
“Are you okay?” You said in a soft whisper as if you were afraid of awakening a beast of some kind.
“I’m fine..” His voice was almost as soft as yours, but without emotion.
“M-Maybe we should go to a hospital or something. Those cuts can get infected.” Jamie suggested.
You nodded your head in agreement. “Yeah. Yeah. Maybe that’s best. Are you sure you're-”
“I said I’m fine.” He snapped. You and Jamie instinctively took a step back. He had never raised his voice at either of you and you could tell that he instantly regretted it, but the anger was still there so he didn't think to apologize for any of it.
“This is my fault.” You spoke up, putting your face in your hands as you plopped down on the steps of the hall. “This wasn't supposed to happen. I’m so stupid.”
Jamie went to comfort you, rubbing her hands across your backside.
“I wasn’t supposed to find out, you mean?” Yunho interjected, his words accusatory.
Lifting your head from your palms you looked at him. He had stopped pacing around now, only stood gawking at you. He looked extremely disappointed, hurt, angry. At you. At San. Probably the world. You deflated on the steps.
“No.. that’s not what I-”
“Do you still love him?” He asked suddenly.
“No!” You said defensively. “No. Of course not.”
“So, you just had sex with him for old times’ sake? Jesus..” He rubbed his hand across his forehead. You sank further.
“Yunho, calm down.” Jamie said. “Let's just hear her out.”
“I’m not hearing anything worth listening to.” Yunho scoffed in disbelief at their current circumstance. “I can't believe this..”
“We just ran into each other while I was looking for you! Everything happened so fast, I wasn't thinking. We were talking, and things got heated, and-” You slowed yourself, trying to gather the right words. “and it happened. I wanted to tell you myself, but I didn't think he would blow up like that after I-”
“After you what?”
Yunho and Jamie had given you their full attention. They were looking at you expectantly, waiting on the next part of your story. Something that would be the final puzzle piece to the mystery of how this whole thing started in the first place. Your eyes found Yunho’s; wet with your tears. You tried to blink them away, but they stung as they fell down your cheeks. You licked them off with your tongue, tasting the saltiness of them.
“After we were done talking… I told him about us.” You said, your voice cracking under the weight. “I told him that I didn’t love him. I couldn't.” Your eyes dropped from Yunho’s, looking into your lap while you toyed with the fabric of your dress. “Because I’m in love with you.”
Both Yunho and Jamie looked at you, eyes wide. Yunho appeared like he was going to speak, but was stopped by the valet who pulled up in his vehicle. The man walked around the car and hesitantly handed the keys to Yunho and stepped away back to his post. Yunho fuddled with the keys in his grasp and tossed them over to Jamie who fumbled them for a moment, but righted herself.
“Why are you giving these to me?” She tilted her head to the side like a bewildered puppy.
“I need to clear my head. You two can head to the house. I’ll pick the car up later.” His tone was more commanding than anything. He started to walk away and you stood to your feet.
“Yunho, come on! We can just talk about this at home.” You pleaded, sounding more desperate than you wanted to, knowing that his leaving was your fault.
“We’ll talk later. Maybe.”
He walked without another word around the line of cars that wrapped around the building. The darkness engulfed his figure until he was completely out of sight. You felt a pain form in your chest; having to catch yourself to breathe through the discomfort. The feeling you felt was similar to someone snatching a stool out from underneath your feet when it was all you had to keep you balanced. A sound louder than tearing metal as you heard your heart shatter into pieces—the same heart that he had helped you mend, had also been destroyed by him. If it weren’t for Jamie who held onto you dutifully, you would have collapsed right there in the dirt. Physically and emotionally exhausted from the night.
Jamie softly touched your arm and motioned for the car. “He’ll be okay, let’s go home.”
The car ride was silent for the most part other than the late night radio that played at a considerably low volume. Your head rested on your arm whilst you stared out the passengers’ side window, letting the wind from outside brush against the dry tear stains on your cheeks. The buildings you drove by whipped past, their shapes melting into one another. Their lights were only blinding for a moment, but it was better than staring down at your phone and hoping that you would get a message from Yunho.
Occasionally, Jamie would peer over to look at you. Maybe afraid that you would take your previous jokes of jumping out of the car in the middle of the freeway more seriously this time. Though, it wasn't something you hadn’t considered. There was so much that you wanted to say to Jamie, but you didn’t know where to start. You knew she was curious, but she didn’t press you for information even against her better judgment.
“Hey.” She started. “About… what happened back there? I hope you don’t blame yourself for all of that. You can’t control people’s actions ya’ know.”
“It was my fault anyway. I provoked San. I… slept with him. What happened between them is because of me.” You admitted, your gut wrenching at the words.
“You didn’t know he would try and pick a fight with him though. Plus, he was drunk. I don’t even think he’ll remember any of it. Well, with the way Yunho left him, maybe he will in the morning.” Jamie sighed, stopping briefly at a red light. “Look, I don’t know how you feel right now in great detail and maybe I’ll never get it, but don’t let this bury you. I’m sad that you felt like you couldn’t come to me with this— believe me I’m shocked, but not as shocked as you think. I just wouldn’t have figured that everything with you and Yunho had gotten as far as it had. I knew he liked you from before San, but-“
You perked up. Turning around to face Jamie in your seat. “He what?”
“He didn’t tell you? Whoops..” Jamie gritted her teeth and inhaled sharply. “Maybe I shouldn’t have said anything.”
“Well, you kind of already did! He liked me before San?” You prodded for more information.
“Look, hey! I don’t know all the details, but I was friends with Yunho before you, so naturally we told each other everything. Then, when you came along, he didn’t say much, but he told me he liked you. A LOT. Then when you met everyone else, including San, well… the rest was history.”
“Why didn’t you tell me?!” You blurted.
“Why didn’t you tell me you were having sex with him?!” Jamie bit back.
You slinked back into your seat. “Fair point. I’m sorry about all of this Jamie. I really wanted to tell you everything from the beginning. It was just so much to unpack, I didn’t know what to say.”
Jamie let out a soft breath through her nose, gearing up the car again as the light changed to green and continued driving down the street.
“I’m not mad at you. More left out, I guess. Trust me, I don’t need to know that two of my best friends were bumping uglies and how or where, but a little heads up would have sufficed.”
“You’re right. I’m sorry…” You reached your hand out towards Jamie’s hand and grabbed ahold of it. “You’re my best friend. You always have my back, and I’m grateful for you.”
“Yeah. Yeah. I’m not going anywhere. So, what are you going to do about Yunho?”
“I don’t know. I feel like he hates me now.”
“He could never hate you. Maybe he just needs time for now. Don’t give up on him, that boy can’t live without you.”
You nodded and turned to look out the window. “Yeah..I hope so.”
계속하다
Two months later…
Work was just as tedious as always. The boss was getting on your nerves about some paperwork you had already filed a month ago, but he never bothered to check and probably lost it. It was getting late now, you and a few of your other co-workers had been the last stragglers and all you wanted to do was finish up the work you needed so that you could get home. You and Jamie had planned to meet up for dinner at a local tteokbokki spot that you had yet to try, but she was still stuck in Jinju for business. So, you decided to pick up some extra hours at work as well.
You clicked away on your keyboard; unmotivated and robotic in your approach to the case file you were working on. You took steady sips of your energy drink, which was probably a bad idea in the grand scope of things but that was how you got things done nowadays. You barely slept ever since that night, and you couldn’t work well otherwise so you depended on energy shots and caffeine to keep you alert.
Your phone chimed suddenly and you almost knocked over your tumbler cup trying to retrieve it. You scrambled for stability, dropping your head as a relieved, but anxious sigh exited your mouth. Righting the cup, you hurriedly checked your phone only to see a message from some clothing company you shopped at before text you about a new sale. Disappointed, you went to your other message threads, scrolling to his name, which wasn’t far down. Tapping on it, you saw all of the messages you had sent him over the last two months since that night, but there was never an answer. Some of the messages in the beginning were paragraphs, some short and some long. You apologized to him over and over wanting to explain everything. Some were you lashing out in frustration over the fact that he wouldn’t answer you or give you the time of day. The lengths of your text to him dwindled over time. You messaged him about festivals in the area, movies that were coming out soon, or video games you think he would be interested in. You sent texts wishing him well. Texts asking how he was. Still nothing.
Jamie tried to keep you hopeful, telling you that he was just busy traveling or work got in the way, but you knew the truth: he was done with you. Your last message to him was a week ago.
I’m really sorry for everything, Yunho. I wish I could take it back, but I can’t. I want to fix it. I miss you, but if you don’t feel the same then…I don’t blame you. I’m sorry again, but I don’t think I can go without you anymore. I guess this is goodbye.
Just reading it again felt like someone was using your heart as target practice and you quickly swiped out of the message. You didn’t expect him to forgive you for what happened, at least not right away. But you had not expected complete radio silence either. The way you two had left things wasn’t ideal, and you desperately wanted to fix them with him, but he just wouldn’t let you. Like you said before, you couldn’t blame him for the way things were now. You just wished they were different.
You finished up the last of your work and printed everything out, stuffing it in a manila folder and depositing it in the mailbox on your boss's door for him to check in the morning. You gathered your things and tidied up your workspace. You could do your timesheet later when you were home, you just wanted to get out of here. Saying your goodbyes to your coworkers, you stepped out of the office and took the elevator down to the base floor.
The security guard was mainly the only one in the area, watching over the front desk. The two of you said your goodbyes as well as you stepped out into the night air of Seoul. There was a small trickle of rain, but you weren’t bothered by it too much. You jogged to the end of the street corner and raised your hand for an oncoming taxi to take you home. Once he stopped for you, you climbed inside and let him drive off, telling him your desired destination.
You followed your new set routine with Jamie and let her know that you were leaving work and heading home. Since you two were primarily separated these days for work, it was a good update strategy. She answered within minutes.
제이미
Be safe. Wont be home until tomorrow! Know you didn’t eat anything so I ordered you food. Should be outside by the time you get there. enjoyyyyy ♡
You smiled down at your phone and thanked her. You don’t know what you would do without Jamie. She was probably your only constant in this ever changing world and you loved her for it.
The ride lasted another fifteen minutes and you were outside of your apartment building. You slid the driver cash and thanked him before getting out of the car. The rain was starting to pick up, so you placed your bag over your head and ran to the entryway. You punched in your apartment code and the door buzzed, granting you entry into the nicely decorated and warm foyer. There was a large front desk where two people sat watching monitors. A single overhead chandelier illuminated the space around you in a bright orange, and there was a white carpet that stopped just halfway info the center of the room. The ones at the front desk greeted you kindly as you passed, slightly damp from the oncoming storm, walking further into the building where the first four sets of elevators were for your wing. You pressed the button to go up to the tenth floor and waited as the elevator came down from its last stop. When the machine chimed, the doors opened and a few people stepped off leaving you to enter the elevator alone, which you didn’t mind.
You just had another large space to yourself. The elevator rose higher and higher and you watched each floor change one after another. Finally, the tenth floor came and you skipped off of it. You walked down the hall, spotting your door, which was just in the center. The stairwell was not far from it, and you were reminded that you should start using the stairs more often. There was also a man leaning over the railing, jet black hair blinding you from his face. He had on a dark coat and rings, and looked like he was in deep thought, letting his thumb toy with his body lip. You didn’t really pay him any mind, but you didn’t recognize him either. Probably just another tenant. You came to stop at your door where a bag of food was laid at the foot of the wood. You bent over to pick it up and punched in the alarm lock pin. The door’s mechanism whirred and disjointed. You pushed down the handle to enter and stopped at the sound of your name. Startled, you whipped around. The man had turned around to face you, an anxious glance in his eyes. Your irises adjusted on his face for a moment and your heart dropped into the pits of your stomach.
“Yunho?” You almost had not recognized him without his blonde hair. It threw you for a moment, but more so that he was at your front door. “I didn’t know it was you, you look different.”
“In the flesh..” He straightened himself and cleared his throat, stuffing his hands in his pockets. “Can we talk?”
Irritation grew in you. “Now you want to talk to me?” You spoke roughly. You didn’t mean to give him an attitude, but a part of you wasn’t sorry for it. He had ghosted you for two months and now he wanted to talk about that night?
“Please.” He said. It sounded more like he was commanding you, than requesting you even in that soft voice of his.
You stared at him and sighed, defeated. You couldn’t be upset at him, no matter how angry you were deep down. You turned and opened the door, setting your things down on the table in the hall and motioned him to step in. He did so without hesitation, walking slowly into the apartment like he hadn’t been here a thousand times over. The both of you kicked off your shoes and you closed the door behind him, letting the air thicken with the sudden tension. It was so thick that it was almost impenetrable. You felt uncomfortable walking around your own home.
You offered him something to drink, but he declined. He instead took off his thick coat, revealing a black short sleeve shirt with some design on it that you could not fully make out. A gold chain was hidden behind the collar that went up to his neck and now glimmered in the light overhead. You walked over to the kitchen island and leaned against it, Yunho sat on the back of the couch, rather uncomfortably due to his long legs, but stayed there anyway.
“I’m sorry for popping up unannounced. I should have told you, but..” He folded his arms. “I had just come off a flight, and it would have been rude if I didn’t answer everything else you sent.”
So, he did see them.
“You ignored everything else anyway. It wouldn’t have made much of a difference.”
Yunho nodded. “I deserved that.”
“So you’ve been traveling this whole time?” You asked, slightly unconvinced.
Yunho shrugged. “Not the whole time, but for most of it. I was in the US for work.”
“I see.”
“Look, it may not mean much now, but I’m sorry. I just didn’t know what to say to you after everything that happened. I really tried to, but I couldn’t express what I was feeling well enough. I’ve never been good at that stuff. I read everything. Even the last one. It took a lot for me to come see you to say this, but I’m not here to hear you apologize anymore. I’m here to apologize.”
You listened to him, swallowing the thick clump of saliva that was stuck in your throat. “Why now?”
“Because it was wrong of me to leave how I did, twice.” Yunho said. “I tried to forget about you. I was so upset and confused by everything then, and what you said to me only confused me more. I didn’t know what to think. As time went on, I realized that I wasn’t even upset that you and San… you know. I mean I was, for a while, but the more I thought about it, it wasn’t just that. It was because I thought I lost you to him, again.”
“Lost me to him?” You stopped yourself to think. The conversation you had with Jamie in the car coming back to you in waves. “Because you wanted me before he did.”
Yunho’s eyes flickered up to you. “How did you know that? It was Jamie, wasn’t it?”
You nodded. Yunho laughed and shook his head. “Yeah. I wanted to ask you out. He knew it, but he swooped in. The rest well, you know. I have always hated that son of a bitch since then, but for the sake of the friendship, I buried it and the feelings I had for you.”
“So, did you plan to sleep with me that night as some kind of revenge or something?”
“No. Same reason you slept with him: it just happened like that.” Yunho said confidently. It was a dig for sure and you felt it, but he wasn’t wrong.
“I deserved that.” You stared down at the ground, admitting your wrong in the situation.
“I hate to say that I read your last message a little too late. I should have just taken some time and gathered my thoughts and talked to you, but I was being childish, selfish. I didn’t consider how you felt at that time. And I’m really sorry.” Yunho moved off of the couch and started making a beat towards you, slowly. “But I don’t agree with what you said.”
Your eyes returned to his. “What?”
“You said you think this is goodbye. It’s not.” Yunho was only a few steps away from you now. You tried to mesh yourself with the kitchen island. “It can’t be because we’re not saying goodbye.”
Yunho was looming over you now. His size alone was intimidating. The way he gazed down at you through the strands of his dark hair was enough to send a tingle down your back. You had to completely look upwards in order to see him.
“Maybe we should.” You didn’t even believe that, but with everything that had happened between you. Maybe San was right. Maybe you didn’t know him as well as you thought. Maybe you didn’t love him. Maybe he didn’t love you. “We don’t need anything complicated anymore .”
“I don’t want anything complicated. I want you.” Yunho placed both of his hands on either side of your body, locking you in the center of the counter. Past images flashed in your head. His scent. That same familiar scent wafting against you. Those eyes that stared daggers into your soul. The way his lips felt against yours. The way his hands caressed over your body like they were searching for something important. “I want to hold you when I want to. Kiss you. Touch you. I don’t want to sneak around with you anymore. I don’t care about anything that happened before. I just want you.”
You shut your eyes for a long moment as he pulled you into him with his words alone. He was so close to you that you were almost afraid to breathe, scared that if it took you too long to think that it could be the very end of this moment entirely. You didn’t want it to end. You wanted Yunho— you wanted to be with him.
“What if I’m not right for you?” You muttered.
“You’re perfect.” Yunho rested his forehead against yours and spoke softly as if he were pleading with you. “I need you, baby. Forgive me.”
You felt yourself unravelin his hands. Your convictions held no weight against the feelings that were churning inside of you again just from being in close proximity with him. The days and weeks without being with Yunho had blended together in a messy, and misconstrued mixture that you had lost track of time. Four years ago, San had stopped the clock on your existence, but Yunho had made time move again. You felt alive with him. Your heart pumped with enthusiasm and longed for your next meeting. Your hand reached towards his face that was now free from the cuts and bruises that you remembered. You ran your thumb over the spot just below his eye, feeling the tenderness of his skin. Traveling down to his lip, remembering where the thin cut was.
“I forgive you..” You whispered back to him.
Yunho did not want to waste more time and neither did you as he took the opportunity to erase the small gap between you. Especially with his wing span, he had no problem scooping you into his arms and crashing into your lips. Your feet had left the ground in a moment’s notice, and you were clinging to him for dear life with your legs flung haphazardly around his small waist. But with his hands gripping onto your ass, you felt stable enough to continue. His lips were exactly how you remembered them. Sweet and soft, fluffier than before, but that fiery passion was the same. Though the kiss was deep and filled with longing, it was only obvious the hunger that underlined every blissful embrace. Yunho carried you off somewhere away from the counter, but you were unaware of where he was headed considering you were handling other matters.
For a moment, your back collided gently with a wall. Yunho pinned you against it, while your fingers entangled themselves in his hair. His tongue pressed against your lips, asking for entrance before you parted them, letting his snake-like appendage traverse the depths of your mouth. You delightfully sucked on his tongue, The sloppy, wet kiss deepening with each go. You mewled approvingly and then suddenly you were on the move again. Yunho kept you steady against him as he pushed through one of the two bedroom doors in the apartment, hoping that yours was the right one.
“God, I want you so bad.” You cooed breathlessly, breaking the kiss for just a moment.
“Don’t worry baby, you’ll have me real soon.” His words were smooth, and you felt a twinge between your thighs.
Yunho walked a few more steps into the bedroom. Yunho tossed you on the bed and you laughed slightly as your body bounced from the impact. He was on top of you again in seconds, caging you inside his arms yet again; his fingers digging into the fabric of your linens. His lips collided with yours again, every peck more calculated than the last. One of Yunho’s hands cupped your face, before sliding from your cheek down to your jaw and clasping around it, holding you still while his tongue dived deeper into your mouth. He had a naturally gentle nature, but he could also be controlling when it came to the bedroom and you loved it. He gave you enough power and control for him to instantly take back when it suited him. With his lower half laying flush in between your thighs, he ground himself into you slightly. You moaned quietly against his lips, feeling the stretch of his jeans pressing against your folds. The friction sent waves of sensations through you and you could feel moisture trickling beneath the layers of your clothing.
Your hands scavenged across his body; feeling his biceps, his broad shoulders, the wideness of his back contrasting with his regularly slim build. You fisted his shirt, pulling the fabric free from it being tucked inside of his jeans, feeling the light pop in your palms once it was free. Yunho broke the kiss for a moment, still straddling you beneath him and sat up into the air, removing the bothersome piece of clothing from his body and tossing it away. The true length of him was free. His abs like ripples against the original build of his skin and you couldn’t help, but touch them. Licking against your own lips like you had come across a new meal to divulge in. The only thing that remained were his pants and that singular chain that laid lifeless against his collarbone. Yunho stared down at you the whole time, keeping your attention focused on him.
“This has to come off too,” he commanded, nodding towards your work shirt. You looked down and watched as Yunho fit a single finger into your shirt and popped every last button like it was nothing. Your chest now exposed to the cool breeze, revealing your black bralette. A sigh escaped Yunho’s lips. “Fuck, you’re so beautiful.”
The tip of his fingers grazed against your neck, running down just where the dip of your collarbone met the lining of your breasts. Your skin bristled at his touch. His hand opened and clasped around your throat; thumb digging into your skin just a bit with the applied pressure on your jugular. He pulled you up to him, even though you were a quarter of his height sitting down, and he kissed you again. You shook yourself out of your long sleeved shirt and tossed it aside as Yunho had, not sure where it landed in the room, but you didn’t care. The hand around your throat unlatched suddenly, almost hesitant, and it was already sliding into your hair, grabbing a handful and pulling. You whined out to him, but he didn’t care. It felt good to you, like a juxtaposition to the sweetness of the kiss, and you wanted it to stay there, just a little while longer. You wanted to stay here with him forever.
The next thing you knew, you were undoing the clasp in his pants. Fiddling with the belt strap until you felt some give. It had been so long since you felt him—you wanted to have him devour you from the inside out, digging so deeply inside of you that he may strike gold. To call his name like he was too far away to hear, for him to claim you like you were his. You wanted him. You needed him.
You kissed him harder, erasing the softness from before, but dousing your kiss in hunger and desperation. Through frustrated grunts, and Yunho’s help, you managed to undo the latch on his pants, tugging them off of him. Yunho kicked them off haphazardly, keeping his focus 100% on you.
He grinned between kisses. “You’re so desperate for me to fuck you, aren’t you?”
There was a throbbing between your legs as he said this. A beat that was calling out to him, and you were aching more and more. You nodded, looking up at him pitifully.
He pushed you back against the bed, the look in his eye darker than before. Your breath hitched in your throat as he crawled back on top of you. You searched his face wildly, wondering what he was going to do next.
“Did you miss me?” He asked you softly. His hand copied the same motion as before, caressing your face first, then your neck, your chest, rubbing circles around your breast before he came to your stomach. You winced slightly, not from pain, but a slick ticklish feeling— your stomach caving under his touch.
“I missed you everyday.” You responded.
Yunho seemed to like that answer because a large smile tugged at his lips. He looked down to follow his hand making sure it was going in the right direction then back at you. His slender fingers fit right between the space in your pants and your groins, running over the mound that was concealed to him. You shifted in his grasp and sighed softly. The pad of his finger came in contact with your clit and you jolted slightly, sliding down to feel the wetness ruining your panties. He rubbed there for a while, watching you squirm and writhe beneath him.
“I can tell. You’re already soaking and I barely even touched you yet. You were always such a pretty little whore for me.” Yunho pulled his hand out and brought them up to his lips, tasting your secretions and groaning in approval of the flavor. “You taste so good, baby.”
The sight must have reached something deep in the pit of your stomach because you were even more turned on than before. You wanted him to take you right there. Not feeling embarrassed to show how much you wanted him to fuck you. For Yunho, however, that fact was obscenely obvious.
“Please Yunho,” you begged. “I can’t take it anymore.”
Yunho chuckled at your pleas, readjusting himself at the foot of the bed now. “I guess I spoiled you too much before.” He reached down and dug his fingers on the inside of your work pants and tugged you towards him, you yelped as you slid against the framing of the bed, your pants loosening from around your waist and exposing your panties. “You’re such a brat when you’re horny.”
He swiveled your pants off of you completely, raising your hips so that it could help him more. He stared down at you, looking at the wet spot in your panties and the fragility of your body. His tongue swiped across his bottom lip and he smiled, dastardly. Like he was thinking of something. You on the other hand were growing slightly impatient. Your inner walls were pulsating like crazy. Your mind was whirring with all the possible ways that he could fuck you and how horribly you wanted him go do so. The feelings you felt were agony, and you knew he felt them too with the hard-on forming beneath his boxers. You watched now as he rubbed himself dutifully, caressing his size beneath the fabric; you felt a moan coming just from watching him. You went to touch yourself as well, but Yunho smacked your hand away.
“Not so fast princess. You only touch yourself when I say so.” He almost seemed like he was going to bite you the way he spoke so roughly. It did not deter you, but you could see he was irritated. It made you want to press him further.
“So, why don’t you touch me?” You asked in a coy voice.
“Punishment. I may not be mad at you, but it’s the least you deserve for now.” He said, finding the smile in his words again.
“You’re cruel.”
Yunho shrugged. “It’s the way the world works. Since you want to touch what belongs to me so badly, go ahead, but when I say stop. I mean it.”
Your eyes sparkled. Watching Yunho as he freed himself from his boxers, never taking his eyes off of you, who followed the bounce in his girth. It had been so long since you saw his mass, you wondered if he had grown. He looked bigger than before. Your cunt pulsed again. You spread your legs and slithered your hand down to your panties and pulled the moistened fabric aside, letting it crumple between your inner thigh. You ran your hand down the center folds, watching Yunho intently. He was completely in a trance watching you fondle yourself. You played with your clit, circling your fingers around it and moaning softly. Yunho ran his hand along his shaft, pumping himself, eyes locked on your body. You imagined his hand there touching you again, your juices pouring out from you and onto the bed sheets; overflowing like a running sink.
“Shit..” he mumbled under his breath. “Keep touching yourself like that. You look so sexy..”
Per his command you continued, sliding your fingers inside of yourself now and listening to the squelch of your insides. Another hand played with your breasts, grabbing and circling around each of them, giving Yunho a full show, which he seemed to utterly enjoy more than he thought. The two of you stayed like that for a while. The sensation was too good, you thought you would make yourself cum right there in front of him. You shut your eyes for a second and moaned out to the sky, calling for whatever powers there may be, but a hand stopped you from going forward, stealing your pleasure from you.
“You’re such a good girl.” Yunho said in an exasperated voice, “Now it’s my turn to make you feel good.”
He grabbed one of your legs and pushed it back towards your shoulders as he laid himself into you. You only had a brief moment to adjust as you felt Yunho rub his thick member between your bottom lips, and he watched your face as he did so. He knew you were still sensitive from how you touched yourself just a few moments before and was using that to his advantage. He knows your body too well. He knew what made you tick and that’s what made him dangerous when he was in control. He smacked his girth against your wetness a few times before slipping into you without resistance.
“Oh my god,” Your brow furrowed. Eyes rolling towards the ceiling as the pressure inside of you built up all over again.
The moan you pushed out was loud. Too loud. You thought about the fragility of the walls around your apartment, knowing they weren’t thick enough to contain your passion. You absentmindedly apologized to them, but Yunho didn’t seem to care nor had he ever. He continued pushing himself deeply inside of you, grunting and trying to hold back his own moans. You gripped onto Yunho’s arm that was locked by your head, your nails scraping across his skin.
“Fuck, you feel even better around me than I remember.” He spoke, his voice more scratchy and gravely now.
Then he started to move. His strokes were fluid, but monstrous. Like he was doing push ups inside of you, but letting his pelvis do most of the work. His arms held him upright, bulging as he came down inside of you, plus with him holding the weight of one of your legs on his shoulder as well, he was not sparing a single motion to ensure you felt everything.
“Yun-ah..” you tried to call his name but it fell short with the moans falling through your lips.
“Look at me.” He growled, grabbing your jaw like he had earlier and forcing your gaze to him while he fucked you. “My pretty girl.”
Your eyes were locked on his, but would occasionally be distracted by the gold chain that was bouncing in your face as well. It was hypnotizing, but liberating in the sense that this was your reward for all of your efforts being good for him.
“You feel so good… fuck.” You pleaded, wrapping your other leg around his waist to deepen his strokes.
“Yeah? You miss me fucking you like this?” He asked.
You nodded weakly.
“Use your words baby.” He said with a sly grin, moving his hand from your jaw to your throat and squeezed. “Speak.”
The grip he had on you made you lightheaded. You couldn’t think properly with the way he was fucking you, more less form an intelligible sentence. Suddenly, a small but searing pain rose in your cheek as you glanced back at Yunho who had slightly popped your cheek, forcing you to pay attention to him again.
“Don’t make me repeat myself baby. Talk to me.” He said.
“I missed feeling you inside of me. I feel good with you in me.” You managed to speak through half breaths.
Yunho continued to work his magic, digging himself deeper and deeper inside of you to get you worked up. Your pussy gripped and released him, trying to keep up with his pace; gushing with the juices that he fucked out of you. Your body responded to him so well as if he was the one controlling it. He swiveled his hips and kept his strokes in a wave like motion, whilst he pounded into you, sending bursts of his aggression through your needy cunt and out through your mouth in the form of guttural moans. You held him close, clawing at his back muscles with your nails. Yunho grunted from the pain, but took it anyway. Fucking you harder than before.
Your stomach pulled. You were almost at your limit. The room was filled with the raunchy sounds of your sex, sounding like music to your ears, but probably like a fight to others. Yunho was relentless, pumping into you everything he had without mercy.
“You take me so well, like a good fucking girl.” He huffed, slamming into you forcefully. The jolts could have sent you slamming into the mattress, but they felt good.
Yunho hissed as his pace was beginning to falter. He gritted his teeth and dropped his head on the side of yours, rutting himself into you. You held him still, fingering his hair to calm him as the two of you belched your moans. His skin felt damp to the touch, but so did yours. The heat clung to your bodies from the overexertion. He was starting to sound more desperate. You were hanging on a thread of insanity. Feeling like you were going to burst at any second.
“Yunho, I’m close..” You murmured.
“Hold it, baby..” He struggled to say. “I want us to cum together.”
You nodded, trying to force the feeling down for just a little more. You didn’t want it to end, but you weren’t sure how much more you could take either, which wasn’t much at all. Yunho rolled his hips against you, sliding in out of your bundle with ease. His pace quickened for a moment and you jumped as he cursed out in your ear.
“Fuck!” He bellowed through nashed teeth. He pumped himself a few more times. “I’m about to cum. Cum with me.”
You did not hesitate to listen this time. With unleveled and shaky breaths, your eyes roll closed and you ride out the rest of his orgasm on his dick. The two of you rocking back and forth until you finally burst. You climax on him, and Yunho fills you to the brim with his cum. His groans were muffled as he hid himself in your neck, gnawing at the flesh there like it was something to hold onto. You could feel him flowing into you, covering your insides with his seed. You tried to catch your breath, letting your juices intermingle with the others. You breathed heavily together. Yunho’s back rose and fell in a broken rhythm for a moment before righting itself. He placed a kiss on your neck and sat up, still hovering over you. Your head fell back from the exhaustion.
Yunho brushed your hair from your face and looked down at you with a tired smile. There was a new found glimmer in his eye, and it sparkled much more than the chain around his neck in the light. He said nothing, only stared at you like there was nothing else in the room.
“What?” You asked softly.
He shook his head, softly caressing your hair and face before he spoke. “I love you.”
Your heart skipped a beat for a second. The two of you exchanged glances and a large, and loving smile was shared between you both. For the first time since you heard those words being said, your heart felt free. No longer locked in the cage you had put it in so long ago as you finally and confidently could mutter those same words back to someone else.
“I love you too, Yunho.”
“I think we should name our kid Oli.” He said suddenly.
You rolled your eyes and groaned, hitting him in his shoulder.
“Ow what?! I’m just saying.”
“You’re so unserious.”
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ciaonicole85 · 2 months
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Waiting on my AO3 invite. Here's a one shot Sydcarmy story. Canon compliant. Post season 2. Please excuse the grammar/spelling mistakes. I need season 3 to get here quickly!
Title: Won't You Be My Neighbor
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It was her break and for the 89th time in the last three days Sydney reassessed the apartments within 15 minutes walking distance from The Bear. As CDC she no longer wanted to depend on the train should there be some kind of accident, strike, or weather event. There were three that she could afford on her own and many more options if she were willing to become a roommate. She wasn't. If inspiration for a recipe struck her at 2am she wanted to get up and cook if she wanted. She loved the freedom of walking around naked after a shower, picking out her clothes or getting a snack. Most of all she missed turning up her music and dancing like an inflatable tube man in private.
She had sent a message to each leasing office to schedule an appointment next Monday and two of the three had confirmed a 10a and 11a showing. It had been more than 48 hours since she messaged the third so she called. The leasing agent informed her that the specific unit she wanted was no longer available, but they had a gorgeous 2 bedroom for $3800 a month if she was interested. "Okay, now that's just two options" Sydney muttered after getting off the phone.
"Hey mija, what you looking at?" Tina asked sitting down to eat lunch.
"Just apartments. I finally have the funds to move" Sydney answered with a sigh.
"What's wrong? Aren't you happy to be getting out on your own?"
"Oh, yeah for sure. It's just I'm really picky"
"Well, it doesn't have to be forever. Just make sure to read the reviews. You don't want roaches or bed bugs".
"Oh, I can't stand bugs! My dad still has to kill them for me, but I better get a fly swatter and spray now that I'll be on my own soon."
Break was over and Sydney stood up to resume her duties. First she needed to talk to Natalie about the upcoming private party. A celebrity had reserved the entire restaurant next Thursday evening. The names of all staff members on duty that night had to be submitted ahead of time with signed NDAs. It was all happening so fast and The Bear's debt was likely to be paid less than a year after opening. First there had been a Grio article about her being a rising black chef. That led to Keith Lee, the TikTok restaurant reviewer, raving about his to-go order that included the T-Bone and the Michael cannoli. It went viral and suddenly, they were booked for the next three months with a waiting list. She was working harder than ever, getting paid pretty well, and she deserved a place of her own.
After talking to Natalie, she found Carmy working on her prep.
"Hey, thanks! I can take over that now if you want"
"Actually….it's done. I wanted to take you somewhere for like 30 minutes" he said finishing up and cleaning the station.
Sydney folded her arms, her eyebrows raised high.
"Okay, where are we going?"
"I know you've been looking for a place and I think know the perfect apartment for you. Just a 10 minute walk from here. The landlord gave me the key so I could show you today" Carmy said trying to sound casual, but a deep pink flush rose in his cheeks.
"Why is he being weird?" Sydney thought but simply said "Okay, that's dope."
The Chicago air was soft and warm, the clean sunlight making everything look new. Summer afternoons like this made you forgive the brutal winters here. Carmy directed Sydney when to turn left and right, but refused to tell her where exactly they were going. Soon they were standing in front of his building.
The reason for his weirdness was now perfectly clear to Sydney and she felt so flattered that she had to avoid looking at Carmy when she said "So, there's an open unit in your building?"
"Uh, yeah. The people who lived just above me moved and I, uh, thought you might want to see it".
The apartment was on the fourth floor. Carmy unlocked the door and let Sydney go in first. The walls were freshly painted in "Cloud White" and the oak hardwood floors creaked comfortably under their feet. The layout was the same as Carmy's apartment with plenty of windows to let in natural light and a shockingly large kitchen for a 1 bedroom place in Chicago. As Sydney inspected the appliances and bathroom, she decided that if the rent was going to eat up even half of her check it was worth it. She had always admired Carmy's spacious apartment and with her sense of style she could make hers, a cozy bohemian oasis filled with plants, wall art, and actual furniture (eventually).
Carmy had let her roam around in silence for a few minutes, muttering and emitting tiny sounds of joy to herself. When she met him in the living room again, he said trying not to grin too widely, "If you like it, it's already yours."
"How? I know places like this are snatched up fast" Sydney said her eyes finally able to meet his again.
"The landlords, they're a couple, and their 20th wedding anniversary is coming up. They want reservations at The Bear." Carmy explained, desperately hoping to sound nonchalant about it.
"Oh, that's nice work, Carmy."
Then Sydney squealed and cried "This is just what I wanted!!" and she flung her arms around his shoulders in a wild hug. Carmy commanded his body not to shudder as he hugged her back. She was just wearing a t-shirt and without her usual layers of clothing he felt her delicate frame, her slim shoulder blades imprinting on his fingers.
In a moment Sydney pulled back shly and let her arms fall to her sides, her face burning. She made a mental note: Hugging Carmy. Not a safe activity for those who want to cook along side him using sharp objects or sleep peacefully at night dreaming innocent thoughts.
"Thank you. Thank you. Thank you!" Sydney said taking another step back and making another turn around the room.
Carmy nodded and concentrated on not melting into the floorboards.
"You're okay with this? We already spend 60+ hours together at the restaurant every week and now I'd be in your building! And literally living on top of you."
"Yeah, well, I want you to. You deserve everything you want, Syd."
"Then I'll take it! Just a warning though. If you hear someone belting out Kpop and an occasional thud, that's just my weekly one woman concert, which will be over no later than 10pm. I'm not being murdered."
Carm was no longer unable to contain the width of his smile. This girl is so cute, his body physically ached. How would he get through service tonight?
With a happy shake of his head, he replied, "Thank you, for the heads up!"
With that Sydney marched towards the door and exclaimed "Take me to your landlord!"
Carmy floated behind her.
Cue: Maxwell's "Whenever, Wherever, Whatever"
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ghostiequill · 30 days
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Mihawk x Librarian Part 2
Since some people requested it (AHHH oh my gosh thank you for all the love <3) here's a part two :3
You’ve learned overtime how exceedingly romantic Dracule Mihawk can be
He would place his heart into your hands and do the embarrassing couple things without flinching. You want matching bright pink keychains? Sure, he’ll even buy them for you. You want to feed him in public? His eyes linger on you as he slowly takes the spoon in his mouth. 
Mihawk made sure to show off in subtle ways, his dexterity in sword fighting transferred to gracefulness when he decided that right then was the perfect time to dance to the old record in your shop after hours. He would subtly show off his muscles when you helped restock large boxes of stock, knowing you secretly admired his strength
Just because he showed off doesn’t mean he couldn’t be a gentleman. Constantly opening doors for you or offering protection in the form of an arm ghosting on the small of your back when you were out wandering the town. 
He would collect little knick knacks for you every time he came to visit. Something small but it warmed your heart to think you were on his mind so much that he thought of you when he saw these objects as you thought of him when you saw them in your shop
He would send you letters, completely unnecessary when he had your number but Mihawk was an old fashioned lover. They would always start with “To my (your name)” a sense of possessiveness, but they would always end with “yours, Dracule Mihawk”. They would be about his daily life, obviously avoiding the more violent parts, but would wax poetic about the serene view of the sea or the bustling islands he visited that he would wish for you to be there with him
That didn’t mean he didn’t love teasing you as well
Moments where he would touch your back were met with your face turning to fire, he would notice and you could barely make out a smirk. Every time his touch would linger when he would hand you something he would insist to get for you or when he would compliment your abilities, whether it be bookkeeping or a particular idea he hadn't thought about before in a book just to see you stutter and smile
You loved to talk books with him. He was shockingly insightful to the depth of the shitty romance novels that only he and you seemed to see. You would both talk for hours about the deep connection between characters and the subtle exchanges between them that would make you go insane. It reminded you of someone else in real life.
“So, did you finally finish that book I recommended? You’ve only had it for forever” you whined to him
“Oh yes sorry, I was too busy actually doing my job unlike those who just read at theirs” you could almost see his amused face on the other line
You met with his ward when he would bring you to his castle for an at home dinner date. Perona would always try to steal you away to dress you up or gossip but Mihawk was always there to make sure you weren’t overwhelmed. With just a glance in his direction your eyes could communicate what you felt
The best part of being at his castle was when after supper he would gently grasp your hand and lead you into the forest. The gentle sounds of owls hooting and crickets chirping serenaded your walk to the clearing he always brought you to to gaze at the stars. Laying down a blanket and guiding your hand to lay down, he would point out the constellations and their stories to you, waxing poetic about stories of lovers who couldn’t bear to be apart, forever entwined in the embrace of the sky. You couldn’t help but imagine what that all consuming love would feel like
Mihawk was not one to give his heart lightly, which is why you felt so special to be in this moment with him. It was during one of these moments where you were both sitting up, gazing at the universe laid out before you when you turned towards Mihawk. He was already looking at you. With your previous partners you’ve never seen such softness and devotion, but with him-he made you feel like you were floating amongst the stars, the air sucked from your lungs as the background disappeared from your view.
He glanced down at your lips before slowly bringing a calloused hand to your jaw, a hand that could bring such destruction and death but was always so careful around you. You couldn't help but lean into its warmth.
His thumb brushed over your bottom lip. “May I?” he whispered, his voice barely audible against the drumming of your own heart. You somehow managed to gain back control of your body as you nodded furiously, before you could mentally curse yourself for looking so eager, as his lips meet yours. You feel a spark of electricity as your lips connect. It was like lightning had struck you. All powerful and all consuming. Your eyes widen before they close as you lean in closer, trying to meld your bodies into one.
His lips brush your forehead before he pulls away, his touch confident but gentle as he holds both your jaw and your heart in his hands. Beneath the canopy of the stars, he envelops you in his arms and it feels like every thought, every worry disappeared as long as you were with him
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wwbtsdty · 1 year
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What Makes You Sweat | 18+
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Summary: You’re really getting tired of how much time your boyfriend spends in the gym when you have so little time together on his days off. So one day you decide to join him to see what really makes him sweat.
Rating: 18+
Genre: idol!au, smut, fluff
Pairings: Jungkook x Reader
Status: Oneshot
Word Count: 4.2k
Warnings: Explicit language, dom!jungkook, sub!reader, smutty smut, sexual tension, big dick!jungkook, unprotected sex(wrap it before ya tap it!), oral sex, cocky!jungkook, multiple orgasms, overstimulation, praising, dirty talk, creampie, rough sex, spanking, bondage, squirting, begging, cursing, fingering, biting, did I miss anything haha.
Author’s Note: This has been sitting in my drafts forever, mainly because I was so upset I lost all my edits to it one day. Sooo I’m just gonna release it, with the premise that its extremely rough because I can’t find it in my heart to edit it again. So here it is, take it for what it is.. a quickie, dirty, unedited short story haha.
This is all fictional. 
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You sigh deeply staring up at the ceiling in boredom, you had tired of playing games on your phone or scrolling social media an hour ago. Glancing at the clock on the nightstand, 10:44 PM... he’d been gone for two hours. Just what the hell does he down there for so long?
Surely most people didn’t work out this long every single day, it seemed excessive and it was starting to get on your nerves. You know he promised to keep his washboard abs for ARMY, but surely he didn’t need to work out every damn day to maintain those bad boys.
Grabbing your phone again you sent off a quick text to him.
Did you fall off the treadmill? Are you seriously still working out?
You and Jungkook had been dating for over a year now what he did for so many hours every day in that gym was still a mystery. You had never been tempted to join him before, when he was finished with you for the night you could barely move, let alone go workout. Meanwhile he was the energizer bunny, ready to go again and again until you finally caved and told him to go work off some steam.
The past few days though you’d had to work late because of your bosses stupid mistake. So you weren’t able to get home in time to soothe the bunny, he was always off at the gym so you would pass out on the bed.
Tonight though you’d had to listen to one of your coworkers gossiping about their sex life with their new younger boyfriend. Which of course in turn, got you thinking about how much you happened to miss your boyfriends delicious body, anxiously waiting all day to get home to him.
So here you sat, waiting on his bed, Bam having had long since given up on waiting for his dad and crawling into his crate to go to sleep. Your phone chimed suddenly causing you to practically lunge for it.
I’m just getting started babe, don’t wait up. 😘
Just getting started? What the hell does that mean? What exactly has he been doing for that last two hours?
You groaned, rolling onto your stomach in frustration as you stared at the text on your phone.
Don’t wait up he says! I hardly get to see him anymore, not with working full time and him getting ready for his next comeback, it seemed like their time together was becoming less and less these days—yet all he wants to do is spend time in the gym!
Jumping off the bed you squared your shoulders as you raided the closet for a pair of leggings and a sports bra.
Fine, if he wanted to work out then you were going to join him, sure it was the last thing you felt like doing, but if it meant you could spend time together then so be it!
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Jungkook had just finished up running for his cardio workout the last hour, pulling up the bottom of his shirt to wipe the sweat that had accumulated on his face.
Now that cardio was done he could start on weights, he needed to work his lower body today since he did upper body yesterday. Then of course abs as always to finish off the workout.
Taking a swig from his water bottle, his attention diverted as the door swung open, you walked in wearing what he guessed could pass as workout clothes.
But really there wasn’t much there, he sure hoped you didn’t wear that shit in public to workout or else there was going to be a conversation later.
“Hey, what's up? I told you not to wait up, i’ll probably be a while still.” He eyed you suspiciously, you had never come to workout with him. Not that it ever bothered him, it was more of his thing and that was totally fine by him.
“Well... you spend so much time here, I thought I would see what you get up to for once. Maybe you could give me some pointers as well, I should probably workout more anyway. I’ve been stuck at a desk all week.”
You shrugged trying to act nonchalant, but your eyes gave you away as you took in his appearance. It wasn’t fair how beautiful this man was, even coated in sweat--no, not even, of course coated in sweat this man was absolutely sinful. All you could think about was stripping that shirt off his delicious body and raking your nails down his chest.
You bit your lip, rubbing your thighs together for some sort of relief. You weren’t sure just how long you stood there ogling your boyfriend, but it was obviously enough for him to take notice.
“Hmm... you want to work out?” He sauntered up to you, eyes darkening as he crowded you against the wall, hands coming up to rest on either side of your head behind you.
Your held your breathe as you took in the sudden change in his demeanor. This was the man you had come to know all too well every night, the one that bent your body to his will.
“I missed you, feels like I haven’t seen you in weeks,” You whispered, tucking a strand of his hair back behind his ear. He smiled brightly, bunny teeth on display as he cupped your cheek leaning down to kiss your forehead sweetly.
Stepping back, he booped your nose cutely with his finger. “I always miss you.” Sighing sadly, “When this comeback is done I promise we will take a vacation, just the two of us. We can spend every waking moment with each other. We don’t even have to leave the bed.” He raised his eyebrows suggestively.
God, You loved this man so much. How you had gotten so lucky to land Bangtan’s golden boy, he was anything and everything you could ask for in a boyfriend.
“I was about to start some weights, you wanna start with some cardio?” Just like that your tender moment was gone and Muscle bunny was back. How did he just flip a switch just like that, was it part of being an idol or something?
Huffing loudly, you made your way over to the treadmill he had just vacated, turning it on the lowest setting. You walked as slowly as possible, staring aimlessly at the little television blasting some random entertainment show before you. Behind you sounds of grunting and heavy weights clinking filled your ears as he began his workout again.
It was about 16 minutes later, according to the treadmill, when you had finally reached your breaking point. His grunts and groans were driving you crazy, you could hardly walk for fear the slick coating your core would drip down your legs.
Stopping the treadmill you spun around to find him doing sit-ups on the floor, each time he sat up he gave a soft grunt. You bit your lip as an evil plan hatched in your head.
Two could play this game.
You sashayed over to the rowing machine, plopping down loudly on the seat as you fastened your legs in. Wrapping your fingers around the handle to pull back fiercely, you let out a whisper of a moan. You saw his head swivel around towards you at the noise.
Ha, take some of your own medicine Kookie!
You smirked, continuing to pull on the rowing machine. Arching your back with each tug so your breasts thrust into the air alluringly.
His gaze zeroed in on the way your breasts proudly displayed as you rowed, suddenly his grey sweats felt all too tight. He knew you were purposely trying to rile him up, and it was working. But his competitive nature would never let him give him.
Plus, he was actually enjoying having you here with him for once, and he had to admit seeing you working out made him proud.
Not like you needed to work out, eyeing that perfect ass he loved so much. Having you ride him reverse cowgirl was one of his favorite positions, he loved watching that ass bounce up and down on his dick.
Reaching down to adjust his hardening length, he pulled his gaze from your body to refocus himself. At this rate he was going to lose this game you had decided to play and turn this into a whole other kind of workout.
You had quietly crept over his way once he went back to finishing his sit-up, the slight sway of your hips driving him to distraction once more. He stopped, arms behind his head as he laid back looking up at you suspiciously, “You done already?” He questioned, regarding you as a smirk lifted his lips.
You weren’t going to give in that easily, sure you’d been annoyed he hadn’t come over at your show earlier while rowing. You couldn’t miss him adjusting himself and the tent in his pants though. You were getting to him too. It was time to change tactics.
Throwing your leg over his waist you straddled his stomach, hands splayed out across his chest as you nestled your core above his hardening length. Your fingers sliding slowly down his chest to push yourself back to lay against his knees causing your breasts to jut out towards his face tauntingly. “Nope. Just taking a break…”
His brow raised quizzically, thrusting his hips off the floor bouncing you in the process to signal you should move. “Alright princess, well I just finished sit-ups… so how about you give me some motivation to finish my pushups?”
His hands encircled your waist when you didn't move, hoisting you up into the air like you weighed nothing. He let your body slide painfully slow down his until your feet touched the floor, “Lay down.” His voice held a hint of command forcing you to lay down where he indicated unbidden. You watched as he knelt down at your feet, hands moving to either side of your head, his body hovering above yours.
“Now be a good girl and stay still.”
You bit your lip at his deep voice, his face coming closer before moving past yours, his breathe tickling your ear.
“One.”
His whispered breathe across your ear sent a shot of arousal straight to your core, nipples suddenly standing for attention as he pulled back up.
Just as quickly he was pressing back down, this time you were more composed, your head swiveled around to nip at his earlobe.
“Two…” He groaned, pulling back with narrowed eyes.
The third time he decided to press his body flush against yours, hips rolling into your core for you to feel his now fully hard length.
You moaned loudly, frantically thrusting your hips up as he pushed up just as quickly. You glared up at that cocky bunny smile plastered on his face.
“Three.”
You'd had enough of this game.
You grabbed that taunt ass with both hands as he came down for the fourth push-up, rolling your hips seductively against his.
He growled, letting his body collapse atop yours in response. “Naughty girl. I told you to stay still, you can’t even obey one command? Am I going to have to tie you up so you don’t move?” His voice was pure sin in your ear, hands sliding slowly up your arms causing goosebumps in their wake, bringing them up above your head where he captured your wrists in one hand.
“So, we're done playing already? Just when the game was getting interesting...”
His right hand moved quickly down your stomach to cup your heat without warning. Your eyes flew open in surprise, arching your back sharply as you let out a groan of satisfaction at finally being touched, tugging desperately at his grip on your wrists to break free.
A soft moan escaped his lips, “So wet for me already? Does this pussy want to be filled so badly by my cock?” He trailed wet kisses down your neck, he bite the spot where your neck meets your shoulders quickly laving the tender spot with his tongue.
He sat back on his heels, admiring the way your breasts looked barely confined by your sports bra as your chest rose and fell rapidly. Taking your breasts in each hand to squeeze them together, dipping down to taking one of your nipples and then the other into his mouth through your sports bra, tongue circling it teasingly before biting playfully.
“Jungkook!” you gasped, hips thrusting against his hand in reflex, chasing some kind of friction. You could feel just how embarrassingly slick your panties and leggings had become at this point, providing barely any barrier.
Jungkook smirked, pressing the palm of his hand down hard against your clit through your leggings. "Is this what you wanted baby?"
Nodding frantically, "Yes! Yes! Please!!" You should be embarrassed at the way your hips followed his hand as he pulled back, but you were already past caring.
He released your wrists, sitting back on his heels as you whined at the lack of contact. Palming at his hardened bulge as he motioned to the bench behind you. "Go sit that pretty ass down on that bench."
Jumping up to obey, your body trembled in anticipation as you spread your legs displaying the large wet patch that has formed in the crotch of your leggings.
He quickly shed his shirt as he approached you, dropping to his knees between your thighs.
Your mouth watered as you admired that amazing body, eyes catching a drop of sweat dripping down his chest that you suddenly wanted to catch with your tongue. And those damn grey sweatpants, always showing just enough to drive you crazy. His hard dick filled them out so well now, you could practically feel it inside you already.
He made quick work of your leggings, peeling them down your legs. God you were practically soaking that bench already and he’d barely touched you.Grabbing your thighs to tug you down to the edge of the bench roughly. He admired your beautiful pussy for a minute, the material of your panties sticking to your lips making them practically transparent.
He slid his fingertip down your slit, pressing just the tip inside your pussy the material of your panties creating resistance from going in any further.
"All of this just for me? How long has my poor baby been suffering? If you’d just said you wanted to be fucked we could have ended this game quickly. But now I feel like making you wait… I won after all.” A smirk quirked his lips, leaning down to suck your clit into his mouth over the fabric.
“Fuck Jungkook!!” You squealed at the feeling of his mouth, the material of your underwear aiding the sensation. You slid your hand into Jungkook's hair, the other gripped onto the bench beneath you as you rolled your hips against his mouth.
Without removing his mouth from your clit, he grabbed your flimsy underwear tearing it off your body and flinging the offending material away. His mouth moving over your now bare pussy, tongue delving into your folds greedily.
You sobbed in relief, squeezing your thighs together at the sudden onslaught of pleasure that was almost unbearable.
Jungkooks digs his fingers into your thighs, keeping them open for his onslaught. "Ah Ah, don't hide from me." He quips smartly, sending a sharp smack to your pussy that causes you to jump, a whine escaping you at the stinging sensation as more arousal seeps from your lips.
He begins lapping at your clit teasingly, his fingers massaging your thighs as he enjoyed the whines escaping your lips.
“Kook, stop teasing!”
He takes your clit into his mouth once more, sucking strongly. At the same time slowly inserting one finger, curling it as he begins thrusting in and out of your sloppy cunt, rubbing that sweet spot each time.
You could already feel that familiar knot forming in your stomach and he’s barely touched you. Turned on beyond belief from their game earlier and not seeing him the past few days, or more specifically not seeing his cock.
"Tell me this isn't what you came down here for?" He remarks, pulling his digit from your pussy and bringing it up to his lips to taste you.
You screamed in frustration at the sudden emptiness, leaning up on your elbows as you regarded him between your legs not moving.
"Jungkook!" He just laughed at your situation, removing his finger with a pop from his lips, his tongue prodding his cheek. He reached down palming at his dick which had become so painfully hard. Your gaze followed his hand, jerking his length over his pants a few times in relief. He couldn’t wait to finally feel you wrapped so tightly around his cock, it had been so long, he was tired of using his own hand for relief. It was a poor excuse for that tight pussy he had come to love.
"Fine, okay! I came down to get fucked okay? I couldn't wait for you any longer… Jungkook! Please just fuck me already you idiot! I need to feel you!" you sobbed, throwing your arm over your eyes in embarrassment at your confession. Even after so many years you could feel embarrassment at how badly you wanted him at times.
He smiles all teeth at your confession, "Good girl, that wasn't so hard now was it? Did you really think I thought you wanted to work out? Unless you were referring to this workout." He motioned to himself with a cocky smirk, tongue running along his lower lip.
Before you could make a smart ass remark he plunged two fingers inside your pussy, thrusting them quickly in and out of you.
Shoving your sports bra up to reveal those beautiful pert nipples. Taking one into his mouth, his tongue lavishing attention on it as he scissored his fingers inside you, stretching you out for him.
"So fucking tight. How are you still so fucking tight!" He grunted, slipping a third finger inside of you.
You winced at the slight burn, your body already having forgotten the shape of his dick. As the burn ebbed, a delicious pleasure spreading in its place as your thighs quaked from the sudden orgasm approaching. Your hips thrusting in tandem with his fingers, chasing your high.
"Yes, Yes! Jungkook harder!!" You tugged at his dark locks, forcing his mouth harder against your breast.
He rubbed at your clit with his thumb, curling his fingers to continually hit your spot as he increased his speed. His fingers moving so fast you could barely keep up.
Suddenly you felt that cord snap inside of you, your back arching off the bench as you screamed out from your orgasm. A rush of liquid flooded Jungkook's fingers, spraying his chest as he dove down to taste your release. Tongue fucking your gaping hole as it quivered around his mouth, you tasted so fucking sweet he couldn't get enough of it.He pulled his fingers out to rub your clit as his tongue delved deeply inside of you prolonging your release.
"Ah, Jungkook no more.. please..."
He forced your thighs to wide as you tried closing them from the overstimulation, squirming away from his mouth. Your fingers tangled in his dark locks as you tugged at his head trying to stop him.
"I know you can, don't even think about stopping me."
He continued lapping at your sopping pussy, filling you with two fingers again as he sought that spot inside you.
You could feel the overstimulation already turning to pleasure again, moaning loudly as you thrashed on the bench with your fast approaching second release.
Jungkook sucked your clit into his mouth, fucking his fingers harder inside of you until you felt that damn break once more. "JUNGKOOK!!" you screamed his name loudly, black flashing behind your eyes as you squirted all over his face this time, your thighs shaking with the intensity of your orgasm.
You lay back panting as he removed his fingers, watching your gaping hole quiver at the emptiness. He licked his lips glancing down at your throughly fucked out face with satisfaction.
"Good girl, I knew you would do it." He sat back on his knees, chest glistening with your release. Standing up, he quickly kicked his sweats and briefs off, his cock springing to attention against his stomach. He wrapped his hand around his painfully hard length, sliding his fingers up and down a few times before his eyes caught on something in the corner.
You were so out of it, currently basking in your post release, you hadn't even noticed him move to the corner of the room. It wasn't until you felt something cold wrapping around your wrists that you startled to attention.
"What..?" you questioned, giving a measuring tug of your wrists to find them tied together with something.
"You were very bad tonight, trying to stop me from enjoying my prize earlier." He gave a sharp tug making sure your wrists were secured with the jump rope.
"So now your going to lay there and let me fuck you however I want." He whispered in your ear before standing up, he lifted your body up from the bench forcing you to now lay on your stomach.He eyed that beautiful ass now on display, delivering a harsh smack to your left cheek enjoying the red marring your skin.
You jumped at the sudden stinging of his hand, a new flush of arousal spreading throughout your body.
He knelt down at the end of the bench, adjusting some knobs. You suddenly found your feet leaving the floor at the same time the rest of your body leaned down closer to the floor. You felt incredibly vulnerable suddenly, ass up in the air, pussy quite literally on display for his viewing pleasure. You couldn't see where he was or what he was doing.
"Fuck, you're so perfect."
He eyed your position, having risen one side of the bench to lift your ass up to the perfect height, while the other was lowered for your comfort so you wouldn't be at a weird angle. He could see just how wet you were from this angle, your pussy dripping on the bench as your hole twitched with anticipation.
He ran his index finger through your slick, "Just for me."
You suddenly felt the head of his dick teasing your core causing you to thrust yourself back against him, you wanted to feel him filling you up so badly. But instead he kept teasing you, tapping his dick against your clit as he pressed a hand down against your lower back to hold you in place delivering a shark smack to your ass.
"Stay still." He growled under his breathe, pushing forward until the thick head of his cock sinks inside you, just as quickly pulling it out.
"Jungkook!" You screeched, wriggling against your confines in frustration, you feel a new wave of wetness seeping from your pussy. "Please, Jungkook, please fuck me! I need your cock.."
His fingers spread out across your ass, massaging at the reddened cheeks. "You look so amazing like this, bared just for me, pussy just waiting to be filled." He pulled your cheeks apart, groping as he watched the way your pussy twitched, admiring the mess you made of the bench already. He strokes his cock once before lining it up with your heat, coating it in your cum before suddenly thrusting forward sinking balls deep inside of you.
"Fuck!" you screamed out, suddenly feeling so full as he sunk so deeply inside you. You swear you could feel him all the way to your stomach. You clenched around him inside you, wanting to keep him inside.
He slowly pulled out until just the tip was left inside you, letting you feel every ridge and vein before harshly thrusting back in as your ass jiggled with the motion.
Suddenly his thrusts sped up, hips plunging into you as the bench jerked beneath you at the strength of his motion. Loud moans left your mouth as your body fought to keep up with his pace. Pleasure wracks your body, fighting against the orgasm already approaching.
He watched your ass bounce against his hips as he took your hips in his hand, forcing your body down to meet his thrusts. Your orgasm hits you as soon as he presses his thumb down on your clit, thighs shaking as your body releases for the third time tonight.
Jungkook continued thrusting through your orgasm, chasing his release as you felt him swell even bigger flooding your insides with his cum. He gave a few more lay thrusts as his cum started leaking out between your bodies soaking the bench below. He slowly pulled out from the warmth of your body, cupping your heat to keep his cum inside.
“Don’t let even a drop escape.” He commanded moving your hand to replace his as he went to slid his boxers and work out shorts back on.
You squeezed your legs together trying in vain to keep his cum from running down your legs as you to went to find your underwear and leggings he had thrown haphazardly. 
He gave your ass a firm smack once you had finished getting dressed, pushing you towards the door.
“Now be a good girl and let me finish my workout.” He flashed you a cocky grin before heading back over to the weights.
Your jaw dropped at his request, “Seriously?!?” 
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ghostlytide · 2 months
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For Business Only | One
I hope you like it ^^
Vincent Renzi x Fem! Reader----1.6K
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MASTERLIST -> Next
Synopsis:
After the whirlwind affair Vincent and you shared years ago, he was sure his goodbye was definitive. A fleeting memory filled with both regret and a peculiar ache that he can’t quite place. But life wishes to scorn him once again when his newest case obliges him to seek out your help. Though this case isn’t the only complicated thing in this strictly professional relationship—not with the way his heart seems to jump at your proximity, or the already familiar tune of your voice. For all the things that had changed, would this mean your story could have a different ending now?
General Tags: Second Chance/Exes to Lovers; Slow Burn; |They were Coworkers; Denial of Feelings; Pining & Longing; Idiots in Love; Eventual Friends (?) with Benefits (?); English isn't my first language so watch out for typos;
It was a late spring night when Vincent said his goodbye to you, so it was only fair that your reencounter would occur in another.
Life played both hommage and karma at him, remembering his words: You may forever hate me, but I promise you that you'll never see me ever again. I've bothered you enough.
That night, he had regained the common sense that had slipped out his grasp since you entered the law firm as an intern; eager to learn from whoever would spare you a glance for something more than to request their thousandth cup of coffee.
Of course, he did.
And how could he not to? When you were so bright and cheerful, all the opposite from those seniors who had seen the worst, to experience who knows how many times the balanced and blind justice's weight to tip at the wrong side. To have to face the client's hopeless expression.
Of course, you'd probably be sheltered from such a dark world at your station once you reached juniorship. But that wasn't the point right now.
Just as it wasn't the point to reminisce. He felt as ashamed as it could be possible while climbing the stairs of the skyscraper, which on the inside was decorated with pieces of steel, glass, and contemporary art that combined perfectly against the simple columns and the frescoes painted in the dome of the main hall.
Vincent shouldn't be overwhelmed by the sight, but he'd never been inside the Building of the Société Générale, white marble walls against a dark mosaic creating a cube to showcase the colorful paintings hung on the walls.
The secretary at the front desk showed him the way to the elevator behind the reception, polished black walls against the metal door as Vincent felt a pull in the pit of his stomach—either for the sudden upward movement or for nervousness, he didn't wish to dwell much on it.
Walking much faster than he wanted to, the secretary passed through an empty, quiet hallway in which Vincent could read a myriad of plaques varying from Accounting Department, all the way to Human Resources.
Finally, she stopped at a door labeled as Banking Associate: Cultural Department. Calling your name, she said: "Monsieur Favrè has sent his lawyer impromptu to meet you."
A muffled voice—your muffled voice echoed in the still hallway, stirring old memories inside of him he wasn't aware of keeping in the first place. "Alright. Let him come in."
A simple nod and the woman was gone. It was only the two of you now.
He took his time, a skipping beat. At the same time, you finished writing away at your keyboard. Then the door was closed with a gentle click.
"Monsieur Delaroux, what can I do for y—" A tentative pause, your bright, smart eyes locked into his. "Vincent?"
This hadn't been the deal planned out in his mind; he was almost hoping you'd ask, with a puzzled voice, who he was as if memory could morph at will rather than being one's source of torture.
So many years passed since he heard his name coming out of your soft lips, that if he remembered quite well, would taste like mocca and vanilla. But why was he remembering that now, from all times?
"Hello," he said, an awkward smile shining in the well-lit office. He put one of his hands inside the pocket of his dress pants, suppressing the childish urge to wave.
You blinked. "What… what are you doing here?"
"I know this isn't what we agreed on," he started, using small steps to get closer to the desk, as if you were a deer likely to run off, or a lion ready to pounce. Vincent had no idea which of the two could be worse. "But I need your assistance for a case. You're the most capable person I can think of, so I had to come and ask for your help."
Reclining from your seat, he let the words simmer into you, using the little time he had to look around your office, part of him was curious to see if he could still recognize a glimpse of the old you, and what he could learn from the present.
"How did you find me?" you asked, hands gesturing from him to sit in front of your desk.
"There are not many art lawyers with your name," he said, slightly flustered he had to admit about searching your name among colleagues, prying into your life when his promise was all the contrary. It wasn't the first time he felt like a fool, yet prideful because he was here for work.
And solely for work.
"I have a case linked with a small private art collection." His voice was plain, devoid of any emotion. He wasn't Vincent right now, the man that tried not to break your heart but failed terribly; he was Maître Renzi one of the talented lawyers from the before small law firm that now was rising like smoke after every case taken. "A murder. Probably linked to the growing art stock. I need an expert in the subject to conduct the required procedures."
"Since when do you take cases about private art collectors?" you hummed, eyes almost twinkling with amusement from all those times he had shit on the upper class and their slippery ways around the judicial system.
It was a good sign that you weren't bringing up his words last spoken, the past that at this moment felt too much aflush despite the time trying to bury it.
"This one is an exception." He couldn't help but get defensive, feeling like a stupid teenage boy being teased despite you being quite some years younger than him. "The owner of the law firm assigned me this case directly. We need to win so the firm can have an expansion." Which meant more law specialties, and more hired lawyers. And then it was… "They're even considering putting an Art Law department."
You could join, he almost said foolishly. Why would you like to be coworkers with him again, when that exact professional relationship prompted all the rest?
You seemed to be thinking the same. "It'll pay well," he added before you could say anything that derailed from his sketched conversation. "And it can help with your curriculum." Vincent signaled to the plaque in front of your computer, reading Junior Consultant. "It could be the case that turns you into a Senior."
There it was the ghost of you, biting your bottom lip in a pondering manner while your gaze was glued to the empty seat next to him.
"What makes you think you're going to win?"
"Have some faith in me, will you?" He chuckled, though deep inside he knew what you meant. It was a question that always lingered at the bottom of his mind, the one that stole his sleep some nights.
"Vincent—"
"Trust me. This is a high-profile case, very important for all people involved. I need your help. I know you're the only person that can help me." He couldn't make another empty promise. To never see you again? Vincent just broke it, and the opposite of that, to be partnered with you as colleagues didn't sound appropriate either. "You're the only one I can trust to remain on my side even if everything goes to shit," Vincent muttered after a while, blue eyes searching for yours as he tried to convince you with pity, even. Because you could never say no to him, and because this case was obliged to use all the desperate, creative measures he could think of.
Though Vincent wasn't lying about said statement. And you knew it.
You looked at him in a long, silent gaze that felt strangely, annoyingly charged inside the medium-sized office, silent so thick he heard the moment you chortled, a breathy, contained laugh that blessed him with the tiniest of smiles.
"Send me the generalities of the case so I can give it a glance tomorrow and write the protocol to follow."
"If tomorrow is one of your free days, we can discuss it over lunch," Vincent found himself saying before his brain could tell him to do better. "I'll give you a printed copy of everything so you can revise it easier. I apologize, but due to the nature of this case, I don't find myself comfortable with sharing this information via remote."
You put away the pencil you were playing with, settling it against the wooden desk with a thunk. "Breakfast. Tomorrow at 9 AM meet me at the Fontaine Saint-Sulpice. We can go to a nearby café once there." Looking from your computer to him, you arched an eyebrow. "Something else you need? You should go before the receptionist notices that you aren't Monsieur Favrè's lawyer."
He shrugged. "I showed her my card, she didn't say anything."
"Well, I'm not allowed to take private clients while on my shift."
"I'm not a client, we're colleagues."
You gestured away. "Wording. You know what I mean."
"You're a lawyer, Mademoiselle, wording matters."
"I write contracts and track art exhibits, Vincent," you told him in a familiar tone he recognized from when you two engaged in a well-needed, unwinding banter. "The one asked to give speeches is you, not me."
"Well, then you better prepare for an exception, because you will have to declare at court about your findings." Vincent heard your sigh and took in the sight of your angry pout, one you dedicated at him when it was time to get out of his office and help other junior lawyers while on your time as an intern. He was surprised to find it as charming as it once was. "I'll see you tomorrow, then."
He stood up, torn between walking facing you or just striding toward the door. He did the last one, turning to smile at you while his hand tapped to feel the door's handle.
It was his time to call your name. "Thank you. Truly."
You nodded, one of the locks of your hair falling toward your brow, obscuring your view. "I'll see you tomorrow, Vincent."
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lovingperfectionsblog · 3 months
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For What It's Worth - Chapter 6
Max Verstappen x Reader
Chapter 6: What line is he willing to cross? 
Chapter summary: Carlos flirts and Max is willing to risk it all to make sure he figures this out properly. 
Warnings: Swearing. 
Word Count: 2791
Authors note: Hello, I’m back, life is slightly less hectic so hello :D This chapter is slightly shorter, it has taken me forever to write and it is a little more hectic, but I am really excited with where this story is heading :D I can’t wait to hear what you all think :)
Previous Chapter | Next Chapter
______
Lando could hear people shouting for him as he sprinted through the paddock, panting as his feet hit the ground below him, pushing him forward. He would never admit it, but you and Max had made him believe in true love, that there was someone for everyone in this world that so often made you feel alone, that maybe all of those rom-coms might actually be on to something, and since you had made him believe in that, he was going to make sure he played a role in getting you and Max together. 
So he ignored the burn in his lungs and how hard Carlos’driver room door was as he ran into it, forced to spend an extra precious couple of seconds, which Max really depended on, trying to get the door open in his panic. 
Both Lando and Carlos flinched as the door hit the wall from the force that Lando swung it open and from the moment that Lando recovered from the shock, Carlos was subject to an onslaught of information that there was no way he could possibly follow. 
“Slow down!” Carlos attempted to calm his friend down all while rapidly trying to process the information coming from Lando, “Did you just call Y/n hot?”
This finally shut Lando up. 
“Like Max’s Y/n?” The nod surprised Carlos, no one ever called you hot, well, not unless it was in whispered tones far, far, far away from Max. 
“Yes, Jesus, just, were you not paying attention to anything I just said?” Lando swiftly closed the door behind him, strategically standing in front of the slight chip in the wall that now existed.
 “How can anyone pay attention-” he was getting sidetracked, he needed to understand exactly what was happening with you and Lando, “Are you seeing her?”
“Who?” A confused look instantly adorned Landos face as he tried to catch up to Carlo’s question. 
“Y/N, You know, Max’s girl? I gotta know, is it like a shared agreement between the three of you or are you actually seeing Max’s girl behind his back?” Carlos couldn't help the unamused look on his friends face and he couldn't help the small laugh that escaped him as he continued, “Or is this you asking me how to make a move on Max’s girl?”
“Actually, I’m here to warn you that she’s coming to make a move on you.” A smug grin spread across Lando’s face as he watched the panic spread on his friend, “She’s wearing a cute little sundress on top of it, determined to get her man.”
“And she thinks that man is me?” Lando shrugged before relenting and sharing a small amount of information with Carlos. 
“She isn’t sure who it is.” The frustration seeped off of Carlos, “You going to listen to me this time round?” 
“Hurry up or get out.” And so Lado began to explain the entire story, start to finish, rushing through the parts that specifically made Max look really bad, with Carlos asking him to repeat those parts too many times and finally, between the two of them, they came up with a plan. 
One that would be kind to you and let you down easily and maybe get Max to actually make a move on you, and now all they had to do was wait until they ran into you. 
_____
Max could feel his face heat up as he watched you leave the motorhome and he was ushered into yet another meeting. He was torn between desperately trying to get your attention and not wanting to look at you for a second longer because every part of him was losing the battle of not just telling you exactly how he felt. 
How had he gotten himself into this mess, how had he finally been brave enough to say how he felt and then subsequently ended up helping you look for the love of your life? A man that you clearly were more interested in than him. 
“You’re staring” Daniel nudged him as you finally slipped out the motorhome doors, dragging his attention back to the meeting. 
“How can I not? This might be the last time I ever see her without the love of her life on her arm.” Dejection filtered through his voice as he allowed his thoughts to escape him, finally allowing himself to begin the grieving process. 
“Oh, you mean you’re finally going to tell her the truth?” Ever the optimist, Daniel couldn’t help but try and be positive about the situation, knowing deep in his soul that if any two people belonged together, it was you and Max. 
“I need you to stop.” Max couldn’t handle it. 
“Stop what?” Daniel could have guessed what he meant, but he was also willing to take advantage of any opportunity he could to convince Max that all he needed was to be a little brave. 
There was a long silence as Max picked at his nail beds, seeking out any distraction from the truth. 
“Giving me hope.” The loudest Max could get out was a whisper, not risking the crack in his voice. Not risking breaking the waterline of the first tears, of many he assumed, when he truly thought about the ramifications of the situation he could only blame himself for. “Please don’t give me hope when I'm about to watch the only woman I will ever love end up with another driver.”
“All you have to be is honest Max.” The glassy eyes didn’t surprise Daniel like he thought it would, but for the first time Daniel realized just how broken Max was in this situation. What had seemed so obvious, so simple, to Daniel, was completely lost on Max. He truly did not realize that you and him were it. You were always going to be together in the end. To Max, this was the end, and he wasn’t in it with you. 
Before Max could protest an alert sounded on both their phones, the exact same message brightening their screens. 
NoRizz: Okay, don’t be mad. 
NoRizz added Chili.
Maxie: Why would I be mad? 
Chili: Because I’m standing here looking at your girl in that sundress, kind of glad you fucked up. 
Maxie: I’m going to kill you. 
NoRizz: He isn’t going to do anything. 
Chili: You didn’t tell me she looked this good. 
NoRizz: HE ISN’T GOING TO DO ANYTHING. 
BigRicc: Carlos, stay away from her until we get there. 
NoRizz: Too late. 
Maxie: What do you mean too late?
NoRizz: She saw him and now they’re talking. 
BigRicc: So stop them? Get involved in the conversation!
NoRizz: Please don’t make me do that right now. There’s a lot of touching. 
Maxie: So you’re just going to let him take my girl?
NoRizz: I mean, technically she isn’t your girl. 
BigRicc: Jesus Lando.
Maxie: I’m going to kill you. 
Maxie: Both of you. 
Daniel could literally see the water in his glass splashing over as the table shook. Max’s leg bouncing rapidly underneath the table from a combination of anxiety and rage. 
Not a single second of this meeting has been absorbed by Max and it took less then a second before Max was moving out the door of the motorhome with Daniel hot on his heels when Horner dismissed them. He rushed through the paddock frantically searching for you amongst too many people. Normally it was like you were a beacon in any space, he was always drawn to you, like you were inexplicably connected somehow, but now Max felt as if that had been severed. He couldn’t see you. He couldn’t feel you. 
He was suddenly lost. 
Suddenly your laugh rang out through the crowd and Max couldn’t help but stop for a second and admire you.
The sun on your skin as you tilted your head back, laughing at whatever Carlos has said. It didn't even matter that it wasn’t him making you laugh, you just looked so beautiful. 
Maybe he could live with you ending up with Carlos if it meant that he got to see you this happy? 
That goddamn sundress really did look good on you. 
“Carlos! There you are.” Daniel made his way past Max and over to you, glaring at a skittish Lando in the distance. 
“You were looking for me?”  Carlos didn’t even bother taking his eyes off you as he addressed the two other drivers making their way over. 
“ Yeah, I wanted to wish you luck for qualifiers, Max over here is looking pretty angry so I think I’m a little nervous for all of us out there today.”  It was both a threat and a warning to the other driver, one Carlos couldn’t help but laugh at. 
“You’re angry? Why? What's wrong? Did something happen with Horner?” Max softened entirely the moment you turned towards him, concern detached in your brows, his heart fluttered as you placed your palm to his chest, a subconscious habit you had now developed whenever Max was feeling angry or anxious, finding that the physical touch calmed him completely. 
He loved how well you knew him, even if you weren’t completely conscious of just how much you did. 
Suddenly you had turned away from him, leaning closer towards Carlos as he moved to comment. 
“I can only assume he is upset over this whole flower situation.” Confusion replaced concern on your face as Carlos couldn’t help but laugh at the cute expression. 
“Why would Max be angry over the flower situation?” Despite Max’s anxiety, he couldn’t help but smile at the exact same thing Carlos was. The tilt of your head and furrowed brows as you tried to piece together everything that was being said. 
“Because whoever sent those flowers shouldn’t be a coward and just say how he feels instead of making you run all over the grid trying to figure out who it is.”  Daniel offered up as an explanation. 
“So it wasn’t Carlos?” Max was looking directly at the driver just mentioned, the question a lot more layered than what you understood? 
“I did not get her the flowers,” a breath of relief left Max, his hand coming up to wrap around yours, anchoring himself even more in your presence, in your reality. 
He still had a chance. 
“But I did tell her that I had a pretty good idea of who it was.”  Daniel couldn’t help but feel proud of Carlos, this is what Max needed, a little bit of pressure, and they were going to make sure he was getting it from all sides. 
“And he has decided to be cruel and make me wait till he tells me just exactly who it is.” Not even your pout could distract Max from the stare he and Carlos were locked in. Carlos was going to make you wait, which meant Max had some time. 
“He has two weeks.” Two weeks. Max could do two weeks. That was enough time for him to figure this all out, “Unless he pisses me off on the track.” Another threat and warning disguised as a joke. 
Max just gave a slight nod as your head was turned away from him, a promise that he would confess in the next two weeks, a promise that he’d let Carlos win whatever he wanted if he just gave him this time to figure it out.
Max couldn’t help but think about how easy it was to get into match fixing because this entire situation has him willing to throw the entire championship out the window if that's what it took. 
“You're technically Max’s PA right?” Suddenly Lando had popped back up into the conversation. 
“I am, why?” No one liked where this was headed. 
“Could you get us all coffee?” A slap to the back of his head was followed quickly by admonishment from the entire group. 
“My PA, not yours, and she’s not the type of PA to get coffee you dick.” Max had subconsciously moved between you and Lando, challenging him. 
“Redbull, whatever, can she just please?” There was a slight desperation in Lando’s voice prompting Max to give you a pleading look, knowing that he was apologize a million times over after this.
“4 Redbulls coming up.” You rolled your eyes as you moved away from the four men, not missing the very short words Max was having with Lando regarding your treatment.
“Listen, this isn’t about, just, wait, Carlos, why did you flirt like that?” Suddenly all the attention was off of Lando and back on Carlos. 
“You flirted with her?” Daniel let out a sigh so deep it could have only come from the very depths of his soul. 
“After the way Max treated her, she deserved to have her ego boosted a little bit,” it was so obvious and so nonchalant that none of the other drivers could even say anything against it, “Plus, Jesus, that dress.” A groan left Carlos tat every single one of them couldn’t help but agree with, none of them scared of admitting it in front of Max at this point, knowing he had absolutely no leg to stand on until he made a move. 
“At least you can flirt with her.” Max couldn’t help but feel sorry for himself. 
“I mean, you could if you weren’t such a pussy.” The deadpan look he received was physically painful in its truth. 
“And she is really fun to flirt with, she gets this very rosy cheek when you do, at least it starts at her cheeks, eventually her entire chest is pink the more you -” 
“I advise you shut your mouth right now.”  Max couldn’t be damned if Carlos told, he wasn’t prepared to let him sit there and talk about you like that. 
“But apparently Carlos is so good with his mouth?” You blew a kiss towards Carlos and before he could even pretend that he had caught it, Lando had stepped in between you two, wildly moving his arms in the air, an attempt to usher off your blown kiss in another direction. 
“Don’t be gross.” All except Max and Lando laughed at his response. 
“Weren’t you just checking out my boobs all morning at breakfast?” Lando whipped his head towards Max, hyper aware of how red Max’s neck was getting. That was pure rage and Lando did not want to stick around for that. 
“You’ve done me dirty, and now since you have, I am leaving for my meeting early.” He made a big show of huffing as he turned around, urging Carlos to follow him off, all but ready to run if that's what saved his life from Max’s wrath. 
And then there were three of you, silently all deciding that it was time you made your way back to the motorhome. 
“Quali starts soon, I assume you boys need to get ready?” It was more of a statement than a question, you knew they needed to go and you were thankful for a moment to lick your wounds. That was your third rejection of the weekend and you’re not sure how many more of them you could go through. 
Before either of them could nod, you’d made your way to your work studio, ready to get this day over with, leaving Max and Daniel to get ready in their respective drivers rooms. 
As soon as Max had closed the door to his, he fully rested against the table in the middle of the room, attempting to figure out his next move as Carlos’s threat played over in his mind again and again. 
______
“Explain to me exactly how Carlos got that close to you in q3?” Daniel didn’t want to believe Max was willing to actually throw these next two weeks to keep Carlos quiet. 
“The Ferrari is quick.”  Max didn’t feel like talking, instead continuing to shove his clothes into his bag so he could just find you and get back to the hotel. 
“Not that quick. Max, you can’t let him win over some girl.” That stopped Max. 
“Not some girl.” Daniel knew what you were to him so why would this surprise him? 
“This is illegal.” Daniel couldn't believe his ears. There was no way Max was actually going to go easy on Carlos for the next two weeks. 
“I got P1, nothing illegal happened.”  He shoved his wallet into his pants and pulled out his phone ready to call you. 
“And what happens when you get closer to the deadline?” Daniel stopped him just before he could leave, stranded between the safety of the drivers room and the world outside. Stranded between a line that if crossed, he would never deserve to be a driver again. 
“She’s not some girl.” 
_____
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