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cultleaderyoongi · 2 years

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Opposites Attract – pt.2 | myg

☆ pairing: Yoongi x f. reader, (Namjoon x f. reader)

☆ genre: s2f2l, e2f2l, love triangle • angst (not so much in this part), fluff, smut (here we go, guys)

☆ word count: 14.6k

☆ warnings: cheesy confessions; mentions of period blood, wearing someone else's underwear (not like that, folks); mature language; virgin!Yoongi, loss of virginity; explicit smut (half of this is smut, I'm so sorry...or am I?) – eating out, fingering, handjob, blowjob, slight breast/nipple play, penetrative sex, protected sex (wrap it before you tap it, kids); pillow talk (so much pillow talk, omg); mentions of alcohol

☆ synopsis: You're Namjoon's girl – kind of. So why does Yoongi, who has never been too fond of people in the first place, get that weird feeling in the pit of his stomach around you? And most importantly, why can't he seem to stop himself from falling for you when you're supposed to be off-limits anyway?

☆ navigation: pt.1 | pt.2

☆ a/n: Hello folks! Here we are, finally. Thanks for being so patient! I hope the ending does the story justice. This was kind of a filler-in story, but I had so much fun writing it still. I'm not sure where my creative mind will take me next and what story I'm going to tackle, but I hope I'll see you again soon. I also hit a milestone recently, and I just want to thank all of you, old or new followers, for reading my little stories ♡

As always, I hope you enjoy reading. If you do – thank you! Lmk how you like it. Tags, comments, asks. Doesn't matter ♡

☆ taglist: @bangtansjonas @larenelizabeth @lovebun-19 @magentamoons @heyitssarah63 @lemonadecandycandy

It's widely believed that the older children become, the bigger problems grow in return. In Yoongi's opinion, that statement never made much sense. Children are the core of all chaos – he was a child once, for God's sake. Therefore he knows exactly what he's talking about. Just take this incident, for example, when he accidentally stumbled over the console cable as an overly ecstatic, 9-year-old Seokjin was in his final boss battle in Super Mario 64, leaving the older one in tears for a good hour. Or when an insecure, 14-year-old Hoseok was asking for an opinion on his outfit and Yoongi told him he looked like a clown with his entire chest, a silent treatment from the former ensuing shortly. As a young adult, you're supposed to possess enough common sense for things to not escalate.

Now it's been two days since the incident – two sleepless nights for Yoongi full of tossing and turning, of staring blankly at the wall in hopes of relief in the form of both answers and sleep. But neither found their way to his bedroom, multiple calls and text messages to Namjoon remaining unanswered.

That night he finally confided in Seokjin, recalling every single second of your timeline. From the moment his platonic feelings for you flew right out of the window to the heart-to-heart talk in the back of the club. As the understanding older brother figure, he told Yoongi to try to sort things out with Namjoon first though with the proper amount of time for him to process as well. He suffered the most damage after all, being deceived by both his best friend and the girl he likes. With you, he advised to stay put for now until the air has been cleared with Namjoon.

Now with no response from Namjoon and no knowledge about you and your current state, Yoongi feels restless despite the fatigue infesting every fiber of his being, his mind running ten thousand miles per hour regardless of the lack of rest. So he does what he's used to in order to unwind, to stay sane.

Sweat drips down his spine as he shoots another shot at the hoop only to watch the ball bounce off again. Groaning out in frustration, he braces himself on his knees, the droplets falling from his forehead onto the court floor. He's tired, so tired, but stopping means his thoughts will come back to life. So he picks up the rolling ball from the ground, getting ready to shoot again –

"Hey."

The familiar sound of the voice has him missing the hoop by a landmark, his head turning to the source of it. "Hi." He's barely able to croak out the single syllable, overtaken by surprise and his throat dry from the exertion.

"Jin-hyung told me you'd be here," the taller male speaks, his steps drawing closer to Yoongi until he stands beside him. There's a short moment of silence that follows, awkwardness settling in between the two.

Yoongi's insides twist and turn, nausea coming in like a crashing wave. He's been fearing this moment, two days full of tossing and turning nearly not enough time for preparation. Don't think about it. Just speak from your heart. "Listen, man. I'm–"

"I'm sorry," Namjoon interrupts him, his head hung low and hands buried deep into the pockets of his cargo shorts. "I needed some time to think which is why I didn't answer any of your calls or messages, but..." He trails, lifting his head again to look at the shorter man. "I really acted out of line that night, and I wanna apologize for that. It was super uncalled for and right-out disrespectful. I'm so sorry."

Yoongi all but stares at him in silence, surprised at the younger man's sudden apology. Sure, the memory of Namjoon calling him out as a virgin in that way won't remain one of his favorites, but he understands where he's coming from. All he wants is to resolve the issue, and in his eyes the fact that he fell for his best friend's crush definitely warrants a freak-out. "I wanna apologize, too." Yoongi licks his lips, his hand coming up to rub at the nape of his neck. "I didn't want things to go that way, but they did, and I could've prevented that had I come clean to you first."

"I guess so. But I never confronted you two about it once I suspected things or made any moves on _____ either, so I'm to blame as well," Namjoon argues, his arms now folded in front of his chest. "None of us are innocent in this case."

"Yeah," the older male agrees, solemnly nodding his head. "I guess you're right." It's surprising how well Namjoon is taking things now, the shocking scene of that night still engrained into Yoongi's mind, but he doesn't question it any further as he's elated beyond belief with everything out in the open.

"On top of that"–picking up the forlorn basketball off the ground a few feet away from them, Namjoon elaborates further–"I made it out to be a bigger deal than it actually was."

Yoongi's brows furrow at that, his eyes following the line of Namjoon's hand dribbling the globe. "What do you mean?"

"I wasn't exactly sincere with _____ either. We talked earlier, and while she wanted to stick around because of you, I wanted her around just for the sake of it." He passes the ball to Yoongi. "When I figured something was off, it wasn't just her – it was also me. I realized I liked the idea of her and being with her more than her as a person, as an individual."

Yoongi holds onto the globe in his hand, his fingers tracing over the rubber pattern. A huge question mark appears in his head. This entire time, he thought Namjoon was all about you. The two of you seemed so into each other.

"It's dumb because she's so great," Namjoon continues. "Smart, pretty, funny – everything you could ask for really. But we just didn't click like I thought we would. And so that night I reached a full-on epiphany. Everything finally made sense, and I was angrier at myself for not appreciating her the way she deserves than the situation at hand."

The older male sends him an understanding nod. "It's fine if you don't feel a connection. It doesn't mean you appreciate her any less. Just that you don't see yourself in a romantic relationship with her. Love can come in all different kinds of forms."

At that, the younger one cracks a smirk. "Yeah, you're right. I still love her as a friend." Running a hand through his hair, he adds, "I mean we didn't even kiss. I tried going for it at the club, but she outright rejected me which was a good call probably. I was drunk and stupid and trying to prove a point."

A flashback of you and Namjoon on the dancefloor comes to the forefront of Yoongi's mind, the two of you too close to his liking, an unreadable expression taking over your features as the man leans in closer to you, his lips muttering out words the elder couldn't make out in the darkness. It all seems silly now with the newly obtained knowledge.

"So... Are we good now?" Namjoon's voice rings in his ears again, pulling him out of his daydream.

And with that, a huge weight lifts off of Yoongi's shoulders. He thought he lost his friend for good, countless of moments left to be forgotten in the past forever. Breathing becomes easier for him now, his lungs filling with oxygen again like it's the first proper inhale in a long time. "Yeah, we're good."

The corners of Namjoon's mouth curl into a small smile before he regards the elder with intent. "With that being said, you should go talk to her – asap."

Mustering the man with narrow eyes, Yoongi pushes back his sweaty bangs. "It just feels so wrong now after this whole fiasco. And she made it more than clear she didn't wanna meddle in our friendship."

"Hyung, don't be crazy. We're cool, she and I are cool... So why not you two?"

Yoongi ponders, his fingers picking at a loose piece of rubber on the ball. "I don't even know if she still likes me or if she wants to talk to me."

"Oh, she does – trust me. Nothing's changed. It's only been two days."

This is such a tricky situation. Although Namjoon confirmed that there's no bad blood at all, Yoongi can't help but feel like he's entering forbidden territory still. Too significant was the impact when things started on the wrong foot and then turned into this mess of emotions. A good friend would still stay away, right?

"Look," the younger one starts once more, "I've seen you two together, and you're perfect for each other. A match made in heaven if you will."

The elder scoffs at the comparison.

"Lemme ask you this then," Namjoon picks up again, "why do you like her?"

Humming out, Yoongi answers, "It's hard to describe, but she just gets me." There's a short pause as he gathers his thoughts. "She's genuine and attentive and such a sweetheart. It's odd when I think about it, but I feel so comfortable around her even when we're such..."

"Polar opposites?" His friend finishes for him.

A single nod of his head serves as a reply. "It helps that we have a lot of common interests, but yeah... I think about her a lot." All the time, to be exact.

Namjoon's face breaks out into a wide beam. "The fact that you admitted all these things without wanting to commit murder right after speaks volumes. I've never seen you like this before–"

Yoongi internally gags at the realization. It really is the first time for him to admit feelings of this kind.

"–which is why you need to talk to her. You gotta sort this shit out."

Yoongi remains passive, his frame rooted in the same spot ever since. Everything that Namjoon mentioned makes sense, but he's too self-conscious to take this step. He's never been in this type of situation before. What if he messes up – again?

"Alright then," the younger man speaks, monotonous yet with an underlying note of irritation. He stretches out his hands, signaling Yoongi to toss him the ball which he does. "If I make this shot from here"–his vision darts over to the basket–"you get moving and go see her right now."

"That's a 3-pointer," Yoongi huffs. "You suck at those."

"Well yeah," Namjoon simply replies, bouncing the ball on the ground, not an ounce of doubt evident in his voice, "which is why you shouldn't be too worried. Right?"

Gnawing on the inside of his bottom lip, Yoongi moves to the side without uttering another word.

Namjoon fixes his stance, his arms reaching above his head and his feet lifting off of the ground with a hop before he bends his wrist, the rubber globe flying high into the air.

Yoongi watches it with hawkeyes, his eyes bulging out of his head as Namjoon lands the shot in an almost perfect curve and the satisfying swish sound follows.

With a pleased smile stretched across his face, his friend turns back to him. "I guess luck is on my side today – or yours. However you wanna look at it."

"Huh..." Yoongi rubs his temples in disbelief. "Now I guess I have no other choice."

Patting the elder on the shoulder, Namjoon sends him a cheeky wink. "You really don't, hyung." The two share a heartfelt laugh before the younger adds, "Look at us. This was our first real fight, and it was over a woman, too. Have we officially entered adulthood?"

"Shut up," he mutters though with a chuckle.

Okay, this is it. There's no way back now. Taking a deep breath, Yoongi tries to mentally and physically prepare himself for what's to come. He has no idea what he's going to say, and no idea what you're going to say, but all cards need to be on the table in order for him to restore peace in his mind.

"You should get going. It's supposed to rain soon." Namjoon eyes him. "You got this." He follows up his statement with a thumbs up in support.

In return, Yoongi solely nods – and then he runs like he's never run before in his life. Everything passes by him in a flash, from people to vehicles to buildings. He doesn't even stop at red lights crossing the street, risking getting hit by oncoming cars on multiple occasions. It's when he passes the fifth block that he notices the clouds in the sky thickening, cloaking it in a dark gray blanket. Only seconds later does it start pouring the heaviest rain in existence, the droplets colliding on the concrete surface letting out a deafening lashing sound. The temperature has plummeted at a speed record, and it's not long before Yoongi is soaked to the bone, shaking to the core.

In the distance, he can already spot your apartment complex emerging from behind the relentless rain though. The picture becomes clearer every growing second, the sight of his destination spurring him on as he doesn't yield to his tired legs. He can feel the breath being knocked out of his lungs at an excruciating rate, but there's no time to rest yet.

With one final leap, Yoongi arrives at the doorstep, ringing your doorbell once, twice, thrice, in quick succession. Luckily, the buzzing sound of the front door opening sounds shortly after, so he gathers his last bundle of strength within him, sprinting up the stairs taking two steps at a time. Fuck taking the elevator. It'll take too long.

As his foot sets on the uppermost step of the fifth floor, his head whips around in search of your apartment. He's never been here before, he realizes, only having seen your residence from outside so far. When the clanking noise of a chain being loosened resonates in his ears, he follows the sound without any second thought.

He almost collapses onto the floor, the exhaustion finally catching up to him, so he clutches the wall behind him as he waits for the door to open. Another click of the door lock has him holding his breath despite the desperate need for air.

"Yoongi, what the fuck?"

At the sight of you and the sound of your voice, a sudden surge of hysteria overcomes him, his form retreating from the wall now finding balance by your door frame. "_____, can we talk? Please, I wanna talk to you." He shudders as the words leave his lips.

With furrowed brows, you inspect him from head to toe. His usual oversized clothes are drenched in dirty rainwater and sweat, sticking to his slim physique, and his infamous blonde, fluffy locks now lay flat atop his head, droplets upon droplets cascading down his face. "Did you walk all the way here through the rain?" you ask in shock.

"Ran actually," he corrects you still out of breath, "but that's not the point."

"Why did you–"

"I really need to talk to you," he repeats. Though his sight is slightly impaired by his wet bangs, his eyes never leave yours, patiently waiting for an answer. "Please?"

You look like you're about to say something, but refrain as you firmly pull him inside by the forearm.

Yoongi now stands with his back turned to you when you silently shut the door behind him, his focus drifting to the pool of water forming on the parqueted floor beneath his feet. "I'm sorry," he murmurs, unsure if he means the damage he's currently inflicting or the one from that fateful night he hasn't been able to shake off his mind ever since. Most likely both, he concludes.

Brushing past him, you retreat to another room, and for a second he's scared he pissed you off until you return with a set of towels and some clothes. "You should take a shower first," you speak, throwing one of the towels over his shoulders.

His eyes blink at you in disbelief. "I don't need a shower. I'll be fine."

"You just ran in the cold ass rain for God knows how long." Shoving the spare change of clothes into his now dry hands, you drag him further into your apartment. "Bathroom's to the right. I'll put a hamper outside the door, so you can throw your stuff in there and I'll put them in the washer."

A heavy sigh sounds from him. "The towels are enough. I just came here to talk."

"Whatever it is, it can wait."

"They probably won't fit." His head nods towards the neatly folded fabrics in his arms.

"You're a lanky dude, don't worry."

"I really just want to–"

"For fuck's sake, Yoongi! I'm not letting you get pneumonia like this."

The male is stunned at your sudden outburst of emotion, the stern look taking over your features severely contradicting your usually friendly exterior, the volume of your voice unraveling unheard depths of your character. He's never seen you like this before, not even during the events of that night he revisits every single second he can spare. So he resorts to listening to your instructions, murmuring out a small Thank you in shame before disappearing into the bathroom.

With a loud huff, Yoongi inspects himself in the mirror, arms propped up on the ceramic of the sink. "I can't believe this is happening." Peeling the dripping pieces of clothing from his body, he strips himself bare before wrapping one of the towels around his lower half. His face contorts in disgust when he collects his clothes in his arms, rolling them up into one giant mess of soaking wet fabrics to drop in the hamper as you told him to. It only dawns on him once he's entered the shower that he gave you everything to wash – everything including his boxers. "Fuck." He facepalms himself, the water trickling across his hand emitting a splashing sound that echoes off the tiled walls.

Despite his initial protest, Yoongi can't deny that the shower did wonders as he steps out refreshed and warmed up. Drying himself off with the towels, he picks up the change of clothes you handed him, opting for the pair of blue basketball shorts first when he notices another piece lodged in between the pile. Upon further inspection, he realizes it's black boxer briefs. "What the–" he mumbles to himself in surprise, wondering where and why you got these. With a cocked eyebrow, the male ponders what to do. It would be way weirder going commando and you must have given them to him for a reason, he rationalizes, so he slides them on followed up by the shorts.

Now with only the top left, he swiftly pulls it over his torso, and as his eyes land on his reflection in the mirror, he sports an even more perplexed expression than at the secret underwear. An all-too-familiar logo stares back at him, the red circle with blue letters reading out Tune Squad atop of it eliciting a slight chuckle from the man. What are the odds, he thinks to himself before moving on to blowdry his hair.

The air is chilly in the living room when Yoongi re-enters, the severity of the situation hitting him again when he spots you perched on the couch, your head turning towards him. "Hey," he manages out, awkwardly loitering by the end of the furniture.

"Hi," you respond, a weak smirk flashing over your features. "Feel any better?"

Yoongi gives you a timid nod, and he swears another smile passes your lips.

"I put your stuff in the washer." You scoot over, motioning for him to sit down. "There's like twenty minutes left on the counter, and then it's gonna be in the dryer for another half hour."

He nods at your words. "Thank you."

"It's nothing." Momentarily averting your gaze from Yoongi, you continue, "Listen, I'm sorry if I was too harsh earlier. I know it's not my usual tone, but I was worried you were gonna get sick this way."

"Y-you were worried?" he stammers.

A light chuckle comes from you. "Of course I was. You were drenched to the core. How couldn't I be?"

Yoongi steers his head to the side in an attempt to suppress a smile. "Say," he starts again to divert the attention, "where'd you get those boxers, by the way?"

"Oh..." An awkward laugh leaves your lips. "Funny story, so uhm... This one time I walked out of class feeling weird even though it was a few days too early – if you know what I mean." You eye him for a reaction, but seeing none you carry on, "Anyway, my friend I was with at that time didn't want me to go through the rest of the day like that. He plays on the ice hockey team and packed a fresh pair for after practice later that day. He always does that."

Yoongi is unsure how to react to your words, impressed at how easily you tell such a peculiar and personal story. There's no hint of reservation behind your way of recounting this event, and it has him wondering if it's because you trust him. The idea draws another smile onto his lips.

"Long story short, he handed me his unused underwear, and I used my flannel shirt as a skirt for the rest of the day." Taking a sharp inhale, you add, "It wasn't ideal since it was early spring and super breezy, but it was all I could do at that point. I had so many classes that day I couldn't miss, and not enough time in between to go back home to change. I also felt really bad my friend had to reuse his worn boxers after practice."

The corners of Yoongi's mouth turn into a frown, your suffering from that day an uneasy image on his mind.

"You have nothing to worry about though," you elaborate at the sight of him, hands extended in front of you. "There was a barrier in between, so no contact with any blood, and I've washed them like hundreds of times. And he promised me it was a brand new pair as well. But honestly, even if it wasn't, Jungkook is the cleanliest guy around I know. He's so fickle, it actually borders on insanity."

Yoongi would have let out an amused laugh, but at the mention of your male friend he feels his heart plummet in his chest. Hearing a name somehow makes the story more tangible, and he asks himself if this Jungkook is more than just a friend to you or vice versa. On top of that, the fact that he's wearing an ice hockey player's underwear right now renders him insecure. How could he ever compete with that? "Sounds like your friend is one hell of a guy," he huffs, a weak smile stretching across his lips.

"Oh yeah," you muse, "you have no idea. Though he always had trouble getting with the ladies for some reason. I literally had to play love doctor and hook him up with my friend Lisa he had a crush on. But they're my proudest creation so far. A perfect match, if I do say so myself." A poignant hair flip emphasizes your point.

If it was any other girl, Yoongi would have left long ago without even batting an eye, but he finds you so endearing. From your endless ramblings to your random actions. He's deeply infatuated with you – yet clueless about whether the feeling is still mutual or not.

"I'm sorry, I've been spewing nonsense." With a shake of your head, you avert your attention back to him. "You said you wanted to talk about something?"

Alright, here it goes. "Yeah..." Clearing his throat, Yoongi carries on, "I talked to Namjoon earlier – about what happened the other night." He hesitates for a second, gauging your reaction. "I'm really sorry about how things went down. I never wanted you to be caught up in some sort of drama. But it ended up happening, and it's because none of us had the guts to actually tell you how we feel about you or talk to each other and clear the air between us."

You send him a solemn nod of your head. "That's true, but I also should've stepped in and not let it get that far. Especially once I realized I didn't reciprocate Namjoon's feelings but still led him on so I could stick around. We're all guilty to some extent."

"Yeah, you're right. But I also understand where you're coming from. Just know that"–Yoongi focuses on his hands fiddling with the hem of his jersey–"what you did doesn't make you a...whore." His eye twitches at the memory of that word leaving your lips as you cried tears upon tears.

The corner of your mouth curls upward ever so slightly, a few strands of hair falling into your face as you let your head drop forward.

"Anyway," the man continues, "I would hate for things to break apart, and Namjoon and I are on good terms now." His eyes catch sight of yours, maintaining contact. "I know I wasn't the most welcoming person at first, but you've become such an important part of the group. It wouldn't be the same without you anymore."

"That's..." you start hesitantly, "comforting to hear. You guys have really grown on me the past few weeks."

Nodding at your words, Yoongi bites his bottom lip. "And also..." he trails, taking a deep breath, "I still stand by what I said – about what I feel for you, I mean." Nervously running a hand through his hair, the roots still warm from blow-drying it, he adds, "And I won't hold it against you if you didn't feel the same anymore after all this trouble. I just wanted it to be out in the open for my own conscience."

It's silent for a second before you release a light chuckle. "You really are oblivious, Min Yoongi." When all he does is stare at you stupefied, you elaborate, "I said I didn't wanna meddle in your friendship, but that doesn't mean I'm gonna stop liking you overnight. Nothing has changed for me – not even a little bit."

He can't fight off the smile forming on his face. "Good. That's good to know." Oh my God, are things actually going well for once? Your feelings are out in the open. You're free to do whatever. "Now," he starts again, "where do we go from here?"

With an arm propped up on the backrest, you regard the man. "Hm, I dunno... Where would you like us to go?"

Yoongi's lips pull into a tight line when he looks outside the window. "I don't think we'll be able to go anywhere in that rain."

"No, you idiot!" You let out a wholehearted laugh. "What do you wanna do about us?"

"I know what you mean." A mischievous smirk creeps up on his face. "I was just making a joke."

Though you shake your head at him, you can't hide the grin growing on your features.

"Maybe we can just talk for now?" He shrugs his shoulders. "Get to know each other even better."

The smile on your face broadens, baring your teeth. "Yeah, I'd like that a lot."

And so you both sit there and talk until the raging storm outside slowly subsides, the clashing sound of raindrops now turning into soft thuds against the surface.

"Space Jam is one of my comfort movies," you recall, resting your head on your folded arm on the backrest. "I think I was seven the first time I watched it, and I begged my mom to get me a Lola Bunny costume for Halloween although she didn't like me wearing such an unfitting outfit for such a cold season."

Yoongi chuckles at your childhood anecdote.

"Anyway, fast forward"–with a wave of your hand you gesture to the jersey that currently covers Yoongi's torso–"this is the adult version now. Well..." You timidly bite your lip, looking off to the side. "Not the adult version, if you know what I mean. I did get one of those, too, for Halloween last year. But yeah..."

Oh shit. Okay. His mouth runs dry at the mention of a more realistic, more revealing version.

A high-pitched beeping noise pulls both of your attention to the hallway.

"I'll go get your laundry." You muster up a meek smile before springing to your feet.

Yoongi watches you disappear into the small room next to the bathroom. You probably expect him to leave now that the rain has let up, and the thought has his face falling, the smile he's been sporting ever since you two had that heart-to-heart talk faltering. He enjoys your company so much, seeing your eyes crinkle and cheeks rise in laughter at one of his jokes even when he deems them not worthy of one. He wants to be around you. He wants to be with you.

"There you go," you sing-song as you re-enter the living room with his clothes neatly stacked and folded. "Nice and warm."

Reluctantly though with unexpected energy, Yoongi emerges from his seat taking the laundry from you. "T-thank you," he stammers. When it happens, it's not on purpose, but his hands linger for a while when they brush against yours, fingers slowly gliding across your knuckles. It's such a small gesture, but it creates so much tension – on top of the already pent-up emotions. "I should get going." Please don't make me go.

"Okay." The word comes out almost in a whisper, your arms wrapping around you as if to comfort yourself.

Yoongi's eyes rest on yours intently, never straying from their intensity even when a beam of sunlight emerging from behind the clouds illuminates them. He could stare at them forever, honestly, drink them in like they're meant to be. If he could paint them, he would though he's assured not even the most skilled painter out there could do them justice.

"Alright," you start again, awkwardly rolling back and forth on the balls of your feet. "I'll see you around then?"

"Yeah," Yoongi replies, his feet slowly traipsing towards the front door. I don’t wanna go. He's almost at the door when he turns around again. "I'll see you soon."

You look like you're about to nod your head, face turned solemn when you stop mid-thought. "You don't have to go if you don't want to." Dropping your arms to your sides, you add, "You can stay for a little longer if you like–"

"Oh, thank God!" It's as if a force takes over him once the words leave your lips, fueling him with bravery because the next thing Yoongi knows is he's stalking over to you in quick steps, his arms wrapping around your waist in a blink of an eye before his mouth is on yours.

There's a split second of realization happening, a moment where he comes back to his senses – he's kissing you. He's actually kissing you. Not only that, but he kissed you out of the blue, and so far you haven't shown any sign of participation with your arms still by your sides. Oh God. Did he read the situation wrong?

He's about to break it off when he feels the pitter-patter of your fingertips dance across his bare arms, traveling upward until they rest on his shoulders. Yoongi's chest swells with pride at your reaction, and when you draw closer to him with your limbs linking behind his neck, he takes it as his go to do the same, scooting closer until you're chest to chest. You're pressed in between him and the backrest of the couch, the clothes he's been holding sliding down onto the cushion as he drops them in eagerness, his hands finding harbor on your hips instead.

Words can't describe the thoughts and sensations surging through him. The feeling exceeds all expectations, his mind heady as he's intoxicated with your taste. It's an out-of-body experience, a high or a hallucination he accepts with nothing but open arms. As if on electricity, his fingertips tingle while exploring the softness of your skin, from the side of your neck to your jaw and your cheek. He's charged with another wave of energy when your hands find their place on the nape of his neck, nails raking across the short strands of hair there. Soon after, you pull apart staring at each other with bated breaths.

"S-sorry," he stammers, creating some distance to properly look at you. "I probably should've asked first."

Your eyes narrow in a playful manner, teeth gnawing at your bottom lip. "You can still ask."

"Can I..." His eyes dart from yours down to your lips and back up. "Kiss you again?"

"I think we can make that happen," you chuckle lightly.

As you look up at him in expectation with your lips curled into a sweet smile, he figures you're waiting for him to make the first move again, so he gently caresses your cheeks with both hands before cupping them, slowly pulling you into him until your lips lock once more.

They dance together in perfect harmony, a constant exchange of dominance happening, and when your tongue swipes languidly across the seam of his mouth, he grants you access to deepen the kiss. It happens involuntarily, but he hums out in satisfaction, the kiss becoming greedier by the second, and before he knows it your hands travel down to his shoulders for leverage as you hoist yourself up to climb onto the backrest of the couch. His hands follow suit, settling below your bare thighs to keep your balance.

And so you ravage each other's mouths like that, becoming more eager in your ministrations. It's not long before your kisses wander down to his jaw along the line of his neck, nestling there with fervor. To Yoongi's surprise, he's been holding up well so far, but the heavier the make-out grows, the more self-conscious he becomes. Thoughts of him and his inexperience guard his mind now – although him moaning out in pleasure when you suckle on a particularly sensitive spot would indicate otherwise. His doubts are hard to fight off though when he feels himself stiffening down south and you're right there. He has to address this before you can take things further.

"Hey..." he mumbles, moving his hands behind the bend of your knees.

"Hm?" you hum out in between kisses.

"Can I ask you something?"

Your eyes are level now as you lift your head. "Sure."

Taking a deep breath, he begins, "Does it bother you that I'm a virgin?" He bites his lip as soon as the words leave him.

"Why do you ask?" Fluttering your eyelashes at him, you probe further, "Are you planning on having sex?"

The male chokes on his saliva. "No!" Noticing your eyes narrowing at his retort, he backtracks, "It's not that I don't want to. I'm up for it if you are." He makes room for a frustrated groan. "What I'm trying to say is I dunno what I'm doing." And what I'm saying apparently.

"Yoongi," you coo, the tips of your fingers toying with the hair on the back of his head, "why would that matter to me? I like you for you and not for how good you are in bed."

The man has to suppress a sigh of relief. You're too good to be true.

"Besides," you continue, "I don't have a ton of experience either."

"You don't?" His eyes widen in surprise.

A shake of your head serves as your answer. "I only had one boyfriend before. Other than that, I'm not the type for hook-ups. Never took any interest in them." You underline your statement with a shrug of your shoulders.

Yoongi nods in understanding, his heart losing some of the heaviness it carried. He himself never got the whole hook-up culture, the idea filling him with dread. There's already a shudder running down his spine remembering having been forced into playing spin the bottle on more than one occasion. But with you – it's different. It feels right.

"So..." your voice drawls, "are you saying you would wanna have sex?"

"Yeah." His answer comes out like a pistol, sharp and resolute.

"With...me?"

"Yeah."

"Like...now?"

"...Yeah."

You regard him as if he just grew horns, but Yoongi barely has the time to respond when you suddenly lose your balance, your entire body tipping backward with a tiny yelp. His arms are fast enough to loop around your middle, but the man himself loses his footing in the process of you falling, so the two of you collide onto the couch cushion together. Your legs are tangled up with each other, his head snugly buried in the crook of your neck. There's a palpable silence lingering in the air as you both try to make sense of the comedic situation, but when you erupt into bellowing laughter underneath him, Yoongi follows your lead with a hysterical cackle of his own.

"Are you okay?" he inquires as he props himself up on his arms, watching your laughing fit with fondness.

"Yeah, I'm okay." You're out of breath when you answer, a hint of tears spilling from the corners of your eyes.

Yoongi detangles himself from your form, sliding back up the couch until his feet come into contact with the floor again. In his folded position, he grabs ahold of your middle again, pulling you back up with him into your initial position.

"Thank you," you huff, letting your legs slide down his side until you're standing. "I'm sorry, I'm such a clutz."

His hands rest on the small of your back, a smile impossible to fight off his face. He's so infatuated with you, he's about to burst at the seams. "Don't worry about it."

You look like you're deep in thought, taking a sharp inhale when you start again. "So...did you mean what you said earlier? About wanting to have sex with me?"

A nod of his head seals his answer.

"B-but this is so random, and I'm random, and y-you–"

Shutting you up with a sweet peck to your lips, Yoongi soothes your rambling mind. "You're not random. I don't wanna do it with anyone else, and I also don't wanna be with anyone else."

At that, you sport a smile that speaks volumes, levels of endearment and affection evident in it. With a chaste kiss to the corner of Yoongi's mouth, you release yourself from his grasp before taking his hand into yours.

He interlaces fingers with you, a gummy grin splayed out across his face, and then you lead him down the hallway to what he believes to be your bedroom.

The door closes behind you with a light click before you turn back around to face Yoongi. Rolling your bottom lip in between your teeth, you murmur, "So, here we are."

"Here we are," Yoongi repeats, standing at the edge of your bed. You stride over to him in slow steps, his eyes devouring every exposed inch of your arms and legs. He should be nervous – which he still is – but at the same time he has never been so sure about anything in his life before.

His hands grab you by the waist as your arms wrap around his neck. You pull him down towards you, determined yet tentative enough to create tension, and then your lips meet again in another passionate kiss. It turns heated fast thanks to the prior build-up, and through tongues and teeth you peel off his shirt, letting it drop to the floor.

Yoongi follows suit, fumbling with the hem of your tanktop before lifting it upward at a tantalizing pace. Your lips disconnect for a second to accommodate, but when he's met with your bra-clad chest his brain shuts down. Wow, okay. You're not wearing anything particularly fancy underneath, but your cleavage delicately spilling out above the cups still has him speechless.

Luckily, you catch onto his sudden blackout, clutching him by the sides as you continue kissing him. "We can stop anytime you want, by the way," you mumble against his lips, lovingly nibbling on the lower one. "No pressure whatsoever."

He furiously shakes his head at that, his hands coming up to cradle your face before engulfing you in another kiss. One of his hands moves to weave through your hair, holding you by the back of your head as he intensifies it, tongue lapping out from time to time. There's no way in hell he's going to let that chance slip from his fingers now.

As if you read his mind, you guide his other hand towards the back of your shoulder blades, helping him unclasp your bra before letting it roam around the side of your ribcage where it rests right under the curve of your boob. "Don't be shy." You smirk against his lips. "You can touch me."

Swallowing down, he follows your proposal, his hand slowly trailing upward until it cups the soft mound. Holy shit. Rolling it back and forth in between his fingers, your response comes in the form of gasps that grow more eager when he swipes his thumb across your nipple.

Your fingers glide below the waistband of his shorts, the garment falling to the floor in an instant. You repeat the same process for his boxers although there's some resistance due to the tighter fit and his boner. Once they slide past the swell of his ass though, they accompany his shorts at his feet – followed shortly by your own shorts and panties. Both pieces pool on the floor in the blink of an eye before you gently push him backward until his calves collide with the side of your bed.

At this point, Yoongi realizes he's stark fucking naked in front of you – but so are you. Holy fuck. His heart races in excitement. With an outstretched arm, he reaches for the surface behind him, his other arm wraps around your middle guiding you with him onto the bed as you straddle him. You're so lost in each other, lips locked and bodies melding together. Your heat brushes against his hard-on, the tip of it gliding back and forth in between your folds causing you both to gasp.

This is just crazy, Yoongi thinks to himself. Just yesterday, he was down in the dumps, the future of his friendship with Namjoon and you uncertain. And today, he got back both his best friend and the girl of his dreams – the latter currently maneuvering his hands down to her cheeks, humming out in satisfaction as he gently grabs a handful of each globe.

"Yoongi..." Your voice is coarse as you mewl his name. "I want you."

He mumbles against your lips, eyes barely open. "You have me."

"No," you whine with a pout, "not like that."

The man chuckles at your playfulness, peppering a small kiss onto the apple of your cheek. "Okay then." His hold around you is secure as he moves you both further onto the bed, but before he can carry on his mind starts racking – you probably need preparation. And he definitely needs skill for that. "Do you..." He trails as you look back at him in question, your striking eyes not making it any easier on him to avoid this. God, she's so beautiful. "Want me to do anything before we...do it?"

You immediately shake your head, pressing a kiss onto the corner of his lips. Gingerly, you guide one of his hands down to your center. "I'm so wet already. I can't wait any longer," you whisper into the shell of his ear.

Holy fuck. This must be a wet dream – no pun intended. Yoongi watches in awe as you glide his hand through your folds once, gathering some of the slick with his fingers.

"See?" you point out nonchalantly yet with a hint of pride.

He doesn't understand what's happening in his head, but at the sight of his fingers coated in your wetness, he can't help but bring them up to his lips, fascinated by the fact that you're this aroused for him. So he pops them into his mouth, his eyes intent on yours as he laps his tongue around them.

Your eyes turn more sinister at the sight, and something changes inside of him as well because all Yoongi can think about now is putting his mouth on you, his mind reeling from your taste. "Maybe just for a min–"

"Yes!" The word leaves you in a breathless manner, desperate yet demanding, and so Yoongi locks lips with you again, gently pushing you down onto the sheets.

It's not long before his kisses move further down across your neck to your collarbone. Once he settles on your chest, you can't contain your sounds, a single moan in the form of his name leaving you as his lips wrap around one of your nipples. With his hand he occupies the other, switching up and mirroring his movements as he either flicks his tongue and rubs his fingers across or delicately bites and pinches your pert nubs. His trail of kisses soon leads onward down the expanse of your torso, and if it weren't for the fact that you're so eagerly awaiting for him to pleasure you, he would thoroughly process the sight in front of him. You're heaven-sent, a gift he never knew he needed with the way you're spread out, wet and ready for him.

"Yoongi..." your voice pulls him out of his fantasy, so he forces himself into action before he starts getting lost in the scene.

Running a digit across your slit, Yoongi tests the waters. When his movement is met with a heady sigh, he draws closer until his face is level with your heat. Fuck, okay. Heaven has got nothing on the view before him. He gives it another shot, slowly circling the pad of his pointer finger around the entire expanse of your opening. You visibly shudder, granting him another audible sigh. "Give me pointers, please" is all he asks of you before he dives in, licking up a single stripe from bottom to top.

Your reaction is immediate, a choked-out gasp sounding from you, multiplying in quantity as he repeats the process a couple more times. "Keep going like that."

Your positive feedback spurs him on as he laps relentlessly at your core, growing more eager when your fingers card through his hair. He must be doing something right then. He watches porn from time to time and it's his only reference, but there must be some truth hiding in there. So next up, he opts for the nub on top of your slit after each lick, eliciting a high-pitched yelp from you as he encloses it with his lips.

"Fuck, Yoongi..." You're a moaning mess now, gripping the strands on the top of his head tighter. "Just like that."

The man takes huge pride in making you feel this heated, causing him to grin into your mound. Throwing small kitten licks into the repertoire, he switches between flicking your clit with his tongue and sucking it into his mouth.

"Right there," you order breathlessly. "More pressure."

Yoongi obliges, putting more pressure into his ministrations to be rewarded with a slight tug on his soft tuft of hair and the loudest moans yet.

"Yeah, that's it." Your voice is coarse from the exertion. "Please, don't stop."

He would never dream of stopping in this situation, so Yoongi sticks to the same action and speed, ignoring the ache starting to settle in his jaw and how tired his tongue is getting, dead-set on giving you the release you're asking for. From the looks of it, it might be not much longer until it finally arrives.

"I'm gonna cum soon," you huff out, your hands finding refuge in the softness of your sheets now as you writhe beneath him.

Fuck, okay. No time to rest. With fervor, his hands settle around your thighs for leverage and to keep you in place as he ravages your core, his eyes focused on the rising and falling of your chest. You look and sound nothing short of a fantasy, the noises that leave your lips have him almost bust his nut on the spot. How is he going to survive the rest of the act?

"O-oh God, I'm cumming!" you then choke out, your voice croaky as your thighs tense up around Yoongi's head before thrashing around at your release.

The man is too wrapped up in the way you grind your cunt further into his face to notice he's been doing the same, dragging his cock back and forth on the bunched-up blanket below his hips. God, he's so turned on, he might explode any second.

Pulling him up by the arm, you're eagerly waiting until your eyes are level before you speak again but not before sealing your lips with his, licking the remnants of you off of him. "Your turn now," you mumble against his mouth, teasingly gnawing on his bottom lip.

At that, Yoongi's eyes shoot open. "I-I don't think I'm gonna–"

"Just for a minute?" you bargain, repeating his words from earlier.

Staring into your eyes, blown-out and hooded, he complies with a nod. How can he say no to that? Apart from that, he's more than curious to find out what a blowjob feels like – especially from you. But at the same time, concern starts settling in as he figures this is going to be the first time he's going to be intimate with someone in this sense, and you're the first pair of eyes that are going to see him in this vulnerable state. He never cared much about it before, but what if you expect more from him down there? What if he's not enough? And what if this is all going to be over in a second?

With a gentle hand on his chest, you push him down onto the sheets, snaking down the entire expanse of his silhouette. You pepper small kisses all over his skin, from his pectorals to his taut stomach down to the trail of hair leading to his dick.

He's taken aback by the time and care you take for his pleasure, hands caressing his sides, lovingly drawing circles into the skin with your thumb. There's no other way but to feel loved and comforted under your touch.

Once you've reached his length, you look up at him through your eyelashes, a hand gently wrapping around it. "Is this still okay?"

The man can't manage out more than an enthusiastic nod, and with that, you stroke him in a slow up and down motion, your lips kissing his leaking tip before closing around it.

Holy shit, okay. His mouth falls agape at the foreign contact, a barely audible gasp leaving him. You're so wet and warm covering him like a blanket, so contrary to his previous concern, his fingers card through your locks in support fast enough as you swallow him further. "Fuck," he voices out his thoughts this time, another string of curses coming from him when your movements become faster.

You seem to enjoy yourself, the sparkle in your eyes and the muffled moans a sure indicator, but the audiovisual of your tongue lapping around him while your meticulously manicured hand covers the rest threatens an early end.

Releasing him with a pop sound, you seek eye contact. "Does it feel okay?" The inquiry comes out almost as a whisper, the exertion evident on your features.

"M-more than okay," he breathes out as your hand still strokes him in swift motions.

At that, you break out into a small smile before diving back down, swallowing him whole while your tongue laves over the prominent vein traveling from the bottom to the tip.

This contrast of images has Yoongi in a chokehold, that innocent little smile paired with this sinful action right after – it's heaven and hell at the same time. "O-okay," Yoongi groans out, eagerly guiding you back on top of him as his patience starts wearing thin. "That was a minute."

"Yeah, you're right." You chuckle at his antics, placing a small kiss on the apple of his cheek. "Sorry, I couldn't help myself."

He watches you stretch across the side of your bed, your hand reaching out for the handle of your nightstand drawer as you rummage for a while before pulling out a square, tin-foiled package.

"Are you sure you still...wanna do it?" Your eyes rest on his, your bottom lip pulled in between your teeth. "I mean it’s kind of a big deal for you..."

Yoongi senses your hesitation, the constant fiddling of your thumb along the toothed edge of the condom package a clear hint. Stopping your mindless fidgeting, he takes ahold of your hand, interlacing his fingers with yours as the small square plops onto his abdomen with a rustling sound. "I still want to. Do you?"

You look down at him from your straddling position, his erection prodding into the flesh of your bottom. Humming out in confirmation with a bright smile on your face, you tighten the grip on his hand, giving it a gentle squeeze before shuffling down his body.

He follows your movements with hawkeyes, from the way your fingers delicately rip open the package to the same ones slowly rolling down the latex onto his cock. A small hiss leaves his lips at the contact, his eyelids fluttering close for a split second. When he opens them again, your heat is already hovering above him.

"Are you ready?" A nod of his is all you need to finally sink down onto him, taking him inch by inch.

Holy fuck. How is he going to survive this?

"Is everything good?" you inquire, your hands rubbing comforting circles into his sides.

Good would be a word to describe it though not quite the truth either. In fact, it would be an understatement and an exaggeration at the same time considering how your warm walls engulf him so tightly that he can't form coherent thoughts – his entire brain power is spent on not cumming on the spot. "Y-yeah," Yoongi huffs out along with an incredulous chuckle.

"I'll be gentle," you inform him before your lips tug into a small smile, and then you slowly but surely start swiveling your hips in a back and forth motion to test the waters.

His reaction is immediate, a grunt resounding in his chest which he transfers outward when you produce a similar sound.

Your mouth falls agape with a plethora of gasps escaping you, rocking back and forth at a faster pace once Yoongi's hands search for refuge on your hips. With his help, you soon settle for a rhythm that has you both satisfied, turning the two of you into a moaning mess.

"Fuck..." He's at a loss for words besides the occasional curse, his eyes transfixed on your figure moving so effortlessly atop of him. It's still beyond him how he got himself in this position since he had no intention of getting involved romantically like...ever. He has no regrets though. This is where he wants to be – with you.

A bright grin graces your lips as you watch him drown deep in his thoughts. "Does it feel good?"

He mirrors your mien with a gummy smirk of his own. "Yeah, pretty fucking good actually." His hands explore your territory, traveling down towards the curve of your ass before sliding back up your sides. They halt under the swell of your breasts where his eyes stay fixated on his thumbs digging into the curve underneath. God, she's so gorgeous, he thinks to himself.

You let out a light chuckle at his hesitating state. "Don't hold back." Laying your hands atop of his, you guide them towards your globes, supporting him by giving them a gentle squeeze. "I know you want to."

Shit, okay. How can you say such things while wearing the most innocent of smiles? Without spending another thought, he complies by rolling the mounds in the palm of his hands, the pads of his fingertips grazing the little pebbles hardening under his touch.

His actions grant a reaction from you as you fall forward, an arm resting beside his head on the bed while the other plants on the wall above the headboard. Grinding harder into him, your mewls grow louder which in turn render Yoongi more eager in his touch.

Wrapping an arm around your middle, he draws you down closer to him until your chest ends up right in front of his face. You look downright delectable from this angle, your breasts bouncing and a sheen of sweat forming in between them. So Yoongi leans forward, catching one of them in his mouth, lovingly nibbling on your nipple as he sucks it in.

"Fuck, Yoongi!" you gasp out, picking up the pace of your thrusts.

He switches over to the other one while his hand travels towards the side of your neck, trailing further upward to cup your cheek. Releasing your pert nipple with a loud pop sound, his mouth moves along the expanse of your chest, his kisses following the line of your clavicle as he drags you down before he does the same to your neck.

You're basically breathing into his ear, heavy pants passing through your parted lips as you ride him harder, no rest for you in sight anytime soon.

Yoongi catches on to your physical exertion, pulling your face towards his to place a sweet peck onto your lips. "Do you want me to take over?" he asks, unsure of what that would entail for him. But you've been doing so great for him, so he wants to learn and return the favor.

"Are you okay with that?" you probe, slowing down your pace as you inspect him.

The man hums out a positive response, planting another chaste kiss onto your lips before deepening it, his hand carding through the strands on the back of your head to hold you there.

The kiss causes you to halt the movements of your hips, your form sitting still atop of him as you comply with his action, your own hands searching for a place on his shoulders.

Yoongi's entire focus is on you and the softness of your lips, so he doesn't notice your walls dragging upward on his length in slow motion until you're separated, a silent hiss leaving you at the loss of contact.

His hand is on your hip when you climb off of him to lie down, gently guiding you onto the surface. Your eyes stay set on his for the entire duration until you lay flat on your back, your stare now fleeting towards the spot where you used to be connected.

It's somewhat of an intimidating yet exhilarating feeling for Yoongi. He's unsure of what to do, having never been in this situation before, but when you look up at him with a small smile and an equally small nod of your head, he's certain everything is going to be okay. You've been beyond loving and patient for him so far, so he takes it upon himself to please you now, slowly burying himself back in between your folds.

Your mouth falls agape at the intrusion, a small gasp drawing out of you until he has fully entered you.

It hasn't been long, but Yoongi is already sure he's not going to grow tired of the sight of you like this anytime soon. "Are you okay?"

"Mhm," you reply, your eyes shutting close for a second before fluttering open again. "You can keep going."

Following your order, he props himself up on his forearms. His face is right above yours, and after placing a quick peck onto the apple of your cheek, he proceeds to pound into you, gradually picking up his pace.

Your pants become higher-pitched and quicker in succession, so when you pull Yoongi's lips onto yours they can still be heard as a muffled sound.

The kiss turns more heated as you wrap your legs around his middle, pressing him flush to your naked form. This doesn't make things easier for Yoongi at all. To his surprise, he's been able to manage well, but the sensation of your thighs around his hips and your tongue wrestling with his all while moaning out at his ministrations serves as a difficult task to keep his composure.

Pulling apart from the kiss, you inspect the man above you. "Are you close?"

It takes him a moment to think about how to answer. He's dangerously close to his release, but he doesn't want to disappoint you as he enjoys watching you writhe and whimper under him.

Before he can give you an affirmative answer, you take the words right out of his mouth. "It's okay, babe."

Babe. You just called him babe. The idea of a pet name always had him almost throw up in his mouth, but hearing you call him such an endearing term without even having settled on where your relationship is headed fills him with hope. Maybe you're actually going to be boyfriend and girlfriend after this? He would very much like that.

A particularly hard thrust of his hips has you moaning out louder than before, your face scrunching up tightly before softening again. "Oh, fuck!"

The audiovisual of you beneath him like that has the core in his stomach tightening, so incredibly tight that Yoongi thinks he might burst at the seams. "Shit! Okay." And with that, the knot finally tears as he releases spurt upon spurt into the condom. His face finds harbor in the crook of your neck, inhaling the scent of your perspiring skin.

The two of you remain in this position with Yoongi riding out his high though overstimulation starts creeping its way into his nervous system. He's certain he's never felt this fucking good in his entire life. Not even when he won the national basketball tournament back in high school after excruciating training sessions and an infinite number of mishaps during those.

"Hey..." your voice pulls him out of his delirious state. "Are you still with me?"

He musters you through hazy eyes. "Yeah..." His vision travels across your face, taking in the fucked-out condition of your features. Your lips are swollen from all the kissing, your lids heavy and your hair a mess. Remembering the situation you were in just mere seconds ago, a rush of realization suddenly takes over him. "You haven't finished yet," he murmurs out.

"Oh..." You lick your lips. "It's fine. You already took care of me–"

You can barely conclude your thought when Yoongi carefully unsheaths himself from you, laying down on his side where he rests his head on his propped-up hand. He already misses the feeling of being inside of you, but hopefully there will be another opportunity for that soon. His hand traverses the expanse of your torso before resting above your core. "Help me out here, please."

"Okay," you comply without hesitation, the single word coming out as a whisper.

Your eyes are trained on his digits when he inches his middle and ring finger through your slit, collecting some of your essence before entering.

There's an immediate response from you, a lewd moan leaving your lips as you throw your head back further into the feathery pillow.

Plunging deeper into your pussy, Yoongi soon finds a rhythm that has you keening under his touch, your hand grabbing ahold of his wrist in desperation as he repeatedly drags his fingers in and out of you. His gaze has been fixated on his hand disappearing in between your thighs this entire time, he doesn't notice yours lingering on him until he turns his head, meeting your eyes filled with lust and want. The image is so intimate, the two of you never straying your vision from the other. It has Yoongi remembering the times when your eyes would meet though the distance in between you was inevitable. There were always worlds separating you, emotionally and physically – but not anymore.

Your grip around his wrist tightens, angling his hand in a different manner so that the palm of it snaps into your clit with every thrust. "Shit! That's it."

Yoongi watches your eyelids flutter shut as you lose yourself in the feeling, so he heightens the sensation for you by bending forward and wrapping his lips around one of your nipples, suckling on it lightly.

There's an increase of volume to your moans, added by another string of profanities. Your hand cards through his sweaty locks, holding him by the back of his head. "I'm gonna cum soon."

Though Yoongi fears this whole act might leave him with carpal tunnel syndrome, he never lets up the pace of his hand, making sure his angle hits your clit just right. He can already sense your walls tightening around his digits, clenching for a split second before loosening again.

You gently pull him by the hair, guiding him towards your face as your hand travels down to his jaw. Your eyes are level again, staring into each other's depths before you pull him down towards your lips. The kiss is somewhat messy from the movement of Yoongi's hand, but it's passionate and hungry nonetheless.

Yoongi feels your lips part from his, and he ends up watching you from above again, admiring the way your brows twitch together and the corners of your mouth curl upward into a smirk.

"Okay, I'm cumming," you announce breathlessly, your smile shifting into an o-shape.

Holy fuck. The intensity of your pussy clenching around his fingers drives him insane. It's beyond anything he could imagine. That, along with your back arching off of the mattress and your legs locking around his hand, has his mind reeling. What would it feel like if you came around his cock? Oh my God.

"Oh God," your voice brings him back to reality. "That was..." You're unable to finish your sentence, an exhausted yet excited chuckle escaping you. "That was something."

"A good something?" Yoongi inquires with a cocky quirk of his eyebrow, slowly extracting his fingers from your cunt.

Letting out a loud huff, you run a hand through your tangled strands. "Yeah, no joke."

With a nonchalant nod of his head, he inspects the slick covering his fingers. "Okay, good." It was hot actually – beyond hot. He still can't believe he could have that kind of effect on you. Licking his fingers clean, he immediately relishes the taste but also regrets his action at the same time. He needs to stop doing that shit or else he's going to pounce on you again.

From his peripheral view, Yoongi can see your eyes set on his every move, so when he turns back to you, you take him by surprise as you immediately draw him in for a kiss. There's a fair amount of tongue involved, but it remains sweet and demure all the same. Once you pull apart, you lovingly pat his cheek. "Go clean up."

You press one last kiss to his other cheek before he climbs off the bed, sauntering towards the hallway down to the bathroom. It's gotten significantly colder, another storm brewing among the clouds when suddenly the first droplets of heavy rain can be heard in the distance again. Once in the bathroom, Yoongi checks his appearance in the mirror. His hair is disheveled, blonde streaks sticking up in every direction, and his cheeks and lips are rosier than usual, taking on a similar shade of pink as the blotches all over his neck. He just had sex with you – his first time at that. "Fuck." The curse comes out in disbelief as he carefully peels the condom off his dick, disposing of it in the trash.

When Yoongi returns to your room, you're already wrapped up in your blanket, longingly looking outside the window with half-lidded eyes. "Uh..." he starts, awkwardly standing in the doorframe.

Your head turns at the sound of his voice, a pleased smile forming on your face as you lift up the blanket patting the empty space beside you.

With a low chuckle, he makes his way over to the bed, slowly climbing in next to you. He's engulfed in comforting warmth as you both watch the drizzling rain outside, the droplets clashing against the cold glass.

It's silent for a long time when you speak up again. "People usually don't like rain, but I find it the most soothing when it's at its worst. It always helps me sleep better."

Yoongi nods at your words. "It's the same for me."

In your position, you turn on your side to face him, an arm propped up on the pillow to support your head. "How are you feeling?" you question, your eyes studying him with care.

A gummy grin appears on his features. If only I could put it into words. "Great."

"Just great?" you inquire with a raised eyebrow.

He repeats, his grin growing wider, "Just great."

"Okay." Letting out a light chuckle, you rest your head on your folded arm. "I think I understand."

At that, Yoongi can't suppress the giggle leaving his lips. You're really a dream come true, catching onto his thoughts without him having to reveal much.

"Do you feel any different at all?" you probe further, fixing a strand of hair Yoongi missed earlier.

It comes involuntarily, a loud cackle resounding from Yoongi. "Am I supposed to develop superpowers or something?"

"No, you idiot," you whine with a pout, hitting the man lightly on his biceps to which he reacts with another chuckle. "I mean emotionally – about us."

The space in between his brows furrows. "Why would I feel any different about us?"

"I dunno." Humming out in thought, you roll onto your back, gaze averting to the ceiling. "I guess I still can't comprehend you're actually into me."

"Why would you think that?" His tone is laced with concern. Did he do something wrong? He thought everything was okay. What happened?

"It's just..." you stall, rolling your bottom lip in between your teeth. "You are you, and I am me. You know? We're so fundamentally different. You're cool as a cucumber, and I'm all over the place. I never thought you'd like me like that."

Yoongi looks at you in confusion. He didn't know you were harboring the same worries as him, and if it wasn't for the fact that the two of you just committed one of the most significant acts of trust he wouldn't be sure how to respond now. "Hey." He catches your attention, grabbing ahold of your skittish hand that's tugging at the seam of the blanket, interlacing his fingers with yours. "I like you because you're so different from me." At that, you finally meet his eyes, so he continues, "You were willing to get to know the real me and not just this moody, closed-off image that people tend to stick with. You were open enough to see me for who I really am. I know I always preach this I don't care attitude, but..." The words trail off his tongue, the idea of revealing such personal thoughts to you for the first time rendering him anxious. "It feels pretty damn good to be understood."

His heart almost beats out of his chest as you solely stare at him, and seconds pass before you break the silence along with an upward curl of your lips. "I'm glad I could do that for you."

It somehow comes naturally to him, but Yoongi pulls your hand towards his lips, sending a light peck to the back of it. Everything is brand new to him yet it feels like he's done it a hundred times before, so comforted and assured in your presence. "If anything"–he lets out a sigh–"I should be wondering what you're doing with a grumpy old man like me."

You scoff with a slight shake of your head, a smile following shortly. "I thought we already established you're more than that."

A simple shrug of his shoulders serves as his reply.

"Is this your way of telling me you wanna hear nice things said about you, too?" With your hands still intertwined, you move them to lightly poke his cheek, stretching out your pointer finger.

Another shrug of his shoulders – this time with a mischievous glint in his eyes.

"Alright," you chuckle, turning back onto your side. "You're more than meets the eye, and that intrigues me. You possess so much love and care for the people close to you – no matter how much their personalities might clash with yours – in your unique kind of way, and you stand by that. I think that's really attractive."

Yoongi can't help but look at you in admiration, a spark in your eyes as you list all of his qualities.

"Yes, you might be mysterious," you continue in a heartbeat, "but you're like an open book when it comes to something you're passionate about. It's clear in your eyes because they have so much fondness in them – not to mention they're also insanely pretty."

When he watches you, Yoongi might experience said fondness in his stare. He can't help but want to dote on you now.

"And also"–your gaze lingers on his hand enclosing yours–"I have a thing for nice hands."

"Oh yeah?" A smirk stretches across his face.

You nod, rubbing your thumb over a prominent vein raking across his knuckles. "And I also"–shuffling closer to him, your eyes lock with his–"have a thing for nice lips."

His tongue laps out, wetting them. "Do you?"

A low hum leaves you, and then you close the distance, lips pressing against each other in a languid kiss.

Yoongi doesn't think he's ever going to get tired of this. He's like putty in your hands, your interlocked limbs lodged in between your transpiring chests mimicking how close he holds you to his heart. With his other hand, he trails a line along the underside of your jawline, cupping your chin to deepen the kiss.

It's not long before you break it off, grinning against his lips. "You're a really good kisser, by the way."

At that, a puff of air escapes him, brushing across your cheek.

"I'm serious," you encourage him. "Your lips are so soft, but your hands are rough. It's kinda hot, actually."

He laughs at that, a wholehearted laugh that echoes off the walls. You're one of a kind. "You're a charmer – and also not too bad yourself."

"Also," you continue, "I can't believe this was your first time. Like it seems impossible after all that."

The man loses himself in another fit of laughter. You seriously need to stop fueling his damn ego. "It's true though."

"Liar."

"Nope."

"It makes no sense."

"I did my best. That's all."

"Oh, that you did." A dark chuckle passes your lips. "I'm not gonna lie – I like that bold side of yours."

"Don't get used to it." Before you can barge in another smart remark, Yoongi places a chaste kiss on the apple of your cheek, As he regards you with intent, he gently brushes your tousled hair behind your ear. "We did things kinda backwards, didn't we?"

"What do you mean?"

"We straight-up jumped into things – which I don't regret, so don't take this the wrong way. But it all happened so fast." The man pauses, watching your chest rise and fall as you laugh at his antics. "I didn't even have the chance to properly look at you. Like–" Lifting up the blanket, he's met with your naked frame, soaking in the lines of your body like a sponge. "–holy fuck!"

Now it's your turn to erupt into bellowing laughter. "You're an idiot." You send a playful jab to his chest.

"No, but for real." He drops the blanket back into place. "I'm new to all of this, relationships and dates and stuff. But I want to try it – with you. I really do like you, _____."

"I like you, too, Yoongi." Placing a gentle peck on the back of his hand, you elaborate, "So much."

"Okay, cool." He can't fight off the gummy grin forming on his face. His heart is soaring, leaping into unknown dimensions. He should feel scared entering untouched territory, but with you he feels safe. He feels right. "So, what now?"

"Hm..." Peering outside the window, you proceed, "It doesn't look like the rain is gonna let up anytime soon, so I guess you're gonna be stuck with me here for a little longer."

"Ah, what a shame." Sarcasm drips off his tongue as he drags you on top of him, a tiny squeal escaping you. "Guess we have to find something else to do then."

You catch onto his drift, head dropping down to engulf him in a deep kiss before pulling apart again. His member already hardens though if you notice it you don't mention it. "I need a pit stop first – pee, clean up – and then I'm all yours."

Yours. Yoongi likes the sounds of that.

"Are you hungry at all?"

He's fighting the urge to reply with a lame joke about being hungry for you though his grin might give him away. "Starving, actually."

"By the way"–slowly sliding off of him though one leg stays still draped across his body, you muster him with warm eyes–"this gives me an idea. I think I know why we work so well, and I need to see if I'm right."

Looking at you in confusion, Yoongi lets you continue nonetheless.

"What's your take on pineapple on pizza?"

It doesn't take long for him to respond. "I like it."

"Okay, how about raisin bread?"

He nods without much thought. "Also okay with that."

"Seafood?" you pry further, your head resting on your propped-up hand.

"Namjoon is the biggest seafood antagonist, but I don't get why."

"I know, right?" you blurt out. "Things would've never worked out with him." As you squint down at the man below you, you catch sight of him trying to suppress laughter. "Don't tell him I said that."

Yoongi watches you fondly, endeared by your weird antics. He could spend the rest of the day with you like this, he concludes.

"Soft or hard peaches?" you continue your interrogation.

"Easy," he hums out confidently, his hand wandering down to grab a handful of your ass. "Both. I don't discriminate."

As you let out a flustered chuckle, you shake your head at his move. "You're lame, but you're right. They each have their pros and cons."

He spanks your cheek lightly, causing you to gasp. Don't get used to it my ass. Yoongi enjoys catching you off-guard.

"Okay, last one – and probably the most important one." You make room for a dramatic pause. "Crunchy or mushy cereal?"

His eyebrows turn into squiggly lines. "Mushy."

"Oh?" Your lips take on a circle shape. "Is this where we part ways?"

"What, why?" Yoongi pouts, sounding more desperate than he intends to. "Kendrick Lamar says it has to be soggy. A 60:40 soggy to crunchy ratio, to be exact."

"Who are you going to agree with? Kendrick or your potential girlfriend?"

Girlfriend. His brain rewires as soon as the word leaves your lips. Did you really just call yourself his girlfriend? Well, potential girlfriend. Talk about catching off-guard. "Y-you, of course," he gulps.

"Good boy." You playfully pat his cheek, pecking his lips. "I'll see what I can find in the kitchen."

This is an entirely new ballpark for Yoongi – the pet names, the compliments, the display of affection. He's still in awe when you finally set foot on the floor, even more so as you stand tall in your bare form.

"Do you want music?"

"That'd be nice actually."

"Anything else?"

The male ponders for a second, the edges of his eyebrows rising further into his forehead. "Maybe you in that Lola costume?"

"You're such an idiot."

Yoongi falls flat onto the couch, face-planting into one of the throw pillows. "Remind me to never play again when it's like 80 degrees outside."

"You never learn, do you?" Seokjin peers over at his roommate, one leg propped up on his thigh as he picks up a slice of mango from the small plate in his hand, practically swallowing the piece whole. "It's not the first time you say that."

The air hangs heavily in the room, sticky and thick, a few open windows contributing next to nothing to a – very much needed – natural air circulation.

"Yeah, but this time I mean it." The words come out as a muffled mess, the younger one's face still buried in the soft cushion when he feels several light taps on his butt.

"Come on, get up. You have guests around."

With a tired groan, he pulls himself into an upright position, reaching out for the person who disturbed his peace yet whose voice he loves so much. "You're not a guest though. You pretty much live here."

"She's talking about us, dude," Hoseok chimes in from the other couch, chugging almost half of his Sprite in one go.

Shooting a deadpan expression Hoseok's way, Yoongi explains, "You're barely guests either. You hang out here every other day."

The younger one doesn't respond to his friend's attitude, already used to it after two long decades of friendship.

Yoongi's eyes soften again as they land on the foreign yet well-known hands he's holding, pulling the person attached to them down onto his lap.

"Ah, you're all sweaty!" you whine, wriggling from side to side in Yoongi's grip as his arms remain wrapped around you.

"No, lemme hold you!"

"Take a shower first!"

"Usually you don't care."

"Okay, but today I do."

Your quarrel continues for a little longer when Hoseok clears his throat. "It's like you guys traded places."

As you give up and finally settle down in your lover's lap, you regard the man on the other side. "What do you mean?"

"Well," Hoseok sets his empty can down on the coffee table, leaning in closer, "not in a million years would I have imagined this dude"– his finger points at Yoongi–"to be so lovey-dovey with someone, and you, on the other hand, to be the opposite."

"Are you saying I'm soft?" Your boyfriend speaks up, his eyes narrowed into thin slits.

Hoseok nods his head, picking up a slice of watermelon from the plate in front of him.

Looking down at the male whose fingers are still interlocked with yours, you sport a bright beam. "Aw, babe. He says you're soft for me." You unclasp your hands to poke his cheeks only to cup them instead when he tries to escape. Ultimately, Yoongi stops fighting against your touch, letting you press a light kiss onto his lips.

He can't help it, the way his cheeks flush a light shade of pink and a hint of a gummy smile takes over him, so he sends a quick peck onto your bare shoulder before hiding his face in the crook of your neck.

"Did I miss anything?" Namjoon joins the rest of you in the living room, one of his hands occupying a cold beer while the other carries a six-pack composed of the same ones.

"Yoongi is soft," you announce gleefully, uncaring of how your words could be perceived.

Namjoon's eyes widen at your statement, and on the recliner next to you, Seokjin chokes on a piece of mango. It takes him a good ten seconds to come down from his coughing fit. "Can we please"–one last cough comes to the surface–"stop saying people are soft without giving any further context?"

"I don't even think I wanna know at this point," Namjoon grumbles, setting down the six-pack on the coffee table before crashing onto the cushion next to Hoseok.

Shrugging your shoulders, you rest your head atop your boyfriend's. "By the way," turning to the youngest, you interrogate him, "how are things going with Kris?" A mischievous smile stretches across your face.

"Oh..." Namjoon scratches the nape of his neck, a small chuckle leaving his lips. "I don't wanna say too much, but I think things are going great." His smile is impossibly wide although it's evident he's trying to suppress it to the best of his abilities. "Thanks again for introducing us."

"You're welcome. And from what I've heard–"

"Did she say anything?" Namjoon interrupts you, enthusiasm written all over him.

You crack a small smile at his antics. "Well, lemme just put it this way – she wouldn't say no to taking the next step."

The eldest lets out another light cough. "What's with all the sexual innuendos today?"

Mustering Seokjin with disbelief in your features, you clarify, "I meant asking her to be his girlfriend. Where's your head at, dude?"

"He hasn't gotten laid in a while," Hoseok states nonchalantly. "Do you have more friends you can hook us up with?"

"Yah! You're just as deprived, if not more."

"That's why I said us, man. Calm down."

With a shake of your head, you divert your attention back to Namjoon, drowning out the chaos in the background. "Anyway, I'm glad things are working out between you two. I think you'd make a cute couple."

"Agreed." Namjoon smiles with a small nod of his head. "All of this trouble had one good thing coming out of it at least – well, two." His hand motions towards you and Yoongi.

At the mention of the past events that changed the trajectory of some for you, Yoongi wakes up from his mental slumber. When he peers up at you, you're already looking at him with a fond smile.

"Yeah." Your smile grows in size. "I'm pretty happy with the way things turned out at the end." Unfurling your arm from around Yoongi's shoulders, you lean forward to grab a beer can, opening it with a crack sound as you plop back onto his lap.

His arms immediately find their way back around your waist again, holding onto you tightly despite your initial protest about his sweaty state. Namjoon has seemingly started engaging in conversation with the other two, so your boyfriend has your undivided attention now. "Can I have some, too?" he asks as he watches you sip on the drink. When you bring the can to his lips, he sports a pout. "That's not what I meant."

With a roll of your eyes yet a contradicting smirk, you bend down as you press your lips against his for a fleeting kiss.

"One more?" he pleads.

You comply with a chuckle.

"...One more?"

"And you're trying to tell us"–you give him another peck–"you're not soft."

"Shut up." His signature gummy grin appears at the thought of how infatuated he is with you. It's been a roller coaster full of new discoveries and experiences, but looking at you Yoongi realizes as long as you're there he would do it all over again.

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elphabaoftheopera · 1 year

Text

I posted 4,837 times in 2022

That's 933 more posts than 2021!

97 posts created (2%)

4,740 posts reblogged (98%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@theemeraldozian

@raven-curls

@coolkrispygardenstudent

@the-shark-is-a-mammal

@beautifulwickedness13

I tagged 825 of my posts in 2022

#goncharov - 61 posts

#unreality - 58 posts

#love fae and yero - 46 posts

#lfay - 46 posts

#wicked fanfiction - 40 posts

#fiyeraba - 38 posts

#fanfiction - 30 posts

#fiyeraba fanfiction - 28 posts

#goncharov 1973 - 24 posts

#wicked - 22 posts

Longest Tag: 140 characters

#it doesn't bother me enough to fight it every time i see my princess club episodes reposted all over the internet but it is never ever credi

My Top Posts in 2022:

In Defense of “Something Bad”

I feel like “Something Bad” gets a bad rep. No, plot driving songs aren’t the most fun to listen to out of context, but in terms of the story itself it’s one of the most important moments in the musical. The “Animals Should Be Seen And Not Heard” reveal never fails to knock the wind out of me, and it gives the context to the entire state of Oz and why Elphaba ends up taking the road she does.

Something that also never fails to break my heart is Elphaba’s innocence in the song. “Someone’s got to tell The Wizard, he’ll make it right. That’s why we have a Wizard.” That naivety and optimism in her is so beautiful and sad. She has such confidence in The Wizard and, by extension, in fairness, justice, and good things happening to good people (and vice versa). When the rug gets ripped out from under her, her disillusionment makes it all the more heartbreaking. Her line later on before “Wonderful”: “no one believed in you more than I did” hits home every time.

Furthermore, Elphaba cares for and respects Doctor Dillamond and he trusts her with this knowledge in return. I see them as kindred spirits and fellow outsiders. He was influential enough to her that his tragic fate left a big scar, as noted in “No Good Deed” when she mentions his name.

I’ve seen some comments along the lines of "I hope the Wicked movie cuts Something Bad” which I couldn’t disagree with more strongly. Yeah, when I’m just in my car jamming to the soundtrack I usually skip this one, but like it or not this is one of the most important scenes in Wicked in terms of character insights and real world application. That is worth the less than two minutes the song takes.

205 notes - Posted May 17, 2022

Person 1: we need to bury this body quick! it’s the only evidence that will ever tie us to the crime

Person 2: we take this to our graves!

Person 1: *phone pings* Oh...oh no....lord in heaven! Not here...not now!

Person 2: What is it?!

Person 1: *holds up phone with tears in eyes*

206 notes - Posted October 18, 2022

Theatre people— here’s a question that isn’t asked a lot. Put into the tags what your favorite Overture is!

279 notes - Posted February 8, 2022

"Feel like pure shit just want her back x"

See the full post

350 notes - Posted May 24, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Friday the 13th is good luck if you’re spooky

1,427 notes - Posted May 13, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review #Gonch gonch baby #yeah I don’t tag a lot sue me tumblr #I’ve posted almost 1000 more times this year than last #improving?#or sad

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amesstm · 2 years

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suna rintarou with a short!so

A/N: not me imagining what it’s like to hug this tall man and blushing so hard that my own father wonders if I’m thinking about my irl boyfriend -

- First of all, Suna was already a meanie in the first place

- You know it. He knows it. We all know it.

- So you shouldn’t have had such high expectations that just because you two were dating that you were off of his bullying list

- Let’s be real, you were higher up the bullying-priority list now

- “Hey! Give me my switch back!” You said, jumping to get your switch

- Unfortunately, this man was tall and your vertical was a bit too short to reach

- Rin had the aud👏ac👏ity👏 to snicker, “And why should I do that?”

- You huffed before posing with as much artificial sweetness as possible, “Because I’m absolutely adorable?”

- Stonewall Rintarou had to resist blushing 😳🤚🏼

- “As acceptable of an answer as that is, you didn’t give me a kiss when I came back from practice.”

- “Okay, okay, come down here you giant.”

- You stepped to your tippy toes and closed your eyes but his lips never met yours

- “I also just wanted to get onto my Stardew Valley farm.”

- You’ll get him for that later. Because let’s face it - you’re easily able to kick him where it hurts :))

- This man would never admit it to anyone, but he is the small spoon of the relationship

- Yes, I WILL SAY IT LOUDER FOR THE PEOPLE IN THE BACK

- He loves how you cling onto him like you’re a little koala 🐨

- However, this does not mean that he will give you piggy back rides

- “Up,” you say, reaching your hands up like it would mean anything to him

- “I’m too lazy for this,” Rin sighs

- “Up!” You repeat, clinging onto his leg

- “You’re so persistent,” he murmurs. “Okay, fine, get up.”

- Omg wait - I just had a thought (dangerous, I know)

- This boy leaves out his hoodies, jerseys, and shirts for you

- If it were dirty socks or sweaty shorts, you’d be annoyed, but they’re… clean and neatly folded hoodies just sitting on the floor???

- Yeah, you can’t help yourself

- He is a man of ✨comfort✨, so his clothes are baggy and big in the first place

- The way that these are LITERALLY dresses on you - adorable; 12/10; he loves to see it

- Especially when you show up to games wearing his spare jersey, all decked out in sports gear

- How do you expect him to focus on the game when all he wants to do is look at you?

- For such a short person, you were the loudest cheerer in the stadium

- He tries to hide it but seeing you makes him smile so much when he feels like he’s not doing enough on court

- As for how you two kiss…? He offered a stepping stool the first time 🤡

- You two managed, but he did actually bring a stepping stool in the back of his car (this is secret information and you do not know this and I did not tell you this)

- Most of the time, he likes to kiss the top of your head, your forehead, or your temple

- You have plenty of pictures of him kissing those places, especially with him resting his head on yours or on your shoulder

- Speaking of pictures - you know this mans is out here being your personal photographer

- He will get on one knee… so you can be tall in your pictures (haha, got ‘em)

- But his personal favorites are taking you from his vantage point so you look short af

- What’s funnier is when you two are in a photo together and he needs to crouch so he’s in the frame

- But when he does get on his knee… you will feel so tall like you can touch the heavens

- Periodt. This man is so sweet when he wants to be 😪

- “Hey, hey, you don’t need to cry so much,” Rin flusters as he wipes away your tears

- “It’s just so sweet!” You mumble out, incomprehensible to everyone. “I can’t - I can’t wait to m-marry you!”

- Atsumu wonders aloud, “So do ya think their kids are gonna be tall or short?”

- Osamu slaps his twin upside the head for you

©amesstm on tumblr // pls do not plagiarize, steal, or repost my content w/o permission!! BUT likes & reblogs are highly appreciated :)

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mythiccheroacademia · 4 years

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A/N: Thank you hottie❤️ Tumblr was fucking with the format, so I had to repost. Anyways, I looovveee this request. I’ve been waiting to be in the right mood to write this. Like, jealous muscular himbos completely head over heels for their s/o? Sign me up.

Sorry for the wait. I hope you enjoy this, sugar plum

All characters are 18+

Warnings: smut below the line!

Katsuki Bakugo:

SFW

bakugo doesnt get jealous

he usually felt secure in your relationship

yeah he got annoyed when kaminari would jokingly flirt with you

and yes, it made him angry when the dekusquad would literally stare at you with puppy dog eyes

and it pissed him off when kirishima suddenly became the funniest guy in the room when you were around

but he wasn’t jealous

how could he be? he’s bakugo katsuki

you agreed to go out with him. the strongest. the best. you couldn't get any better than him

right?

lmao no

the bigger the ego, the more fragile it was

bakugo doesnt handle jealousy well

there’s a small part of him that knows he can be an asshole

he’s not the most...affectionate person

but damn it, if he doesnt try his hardest for you

you notice that he gets quieter but his actions become a lot more aggressive

he’s glaring at anyone that smiles at you

it’s honestly scarier than his threats

forces you to hold hands

is suddenly into PDA??? when he kissed you in front of your friends you literally made a face

you didn't know what was up with him, but you were really confused when you told him to chill and he visibility wilted

once he came around to telling you that he wouldn't hold it against you if you wanted to leave him, you were quick to reassure him

give him a couple kisses and rub his ego just a tad, and he’ll be back to normal

acts like he didn't just look like he was about to cry two seconds ago

NSFW

there are two things that happen when bakugo gets jealous

at first, he’s very rough and handsy

he likes to talk big and say things like

“imma fuck you up when we get home”

“you like when daddy does that, sweetheart?”

“kiss it right there, baby”

“youre mine. tell me your mine”

he’s doing everything he can to get you screaming and thrashing

he’ll go down on you for hours, leave you trembling, only to tell you that was a warm-up

there’s this dark look in his eyes when he’s pounding into you, gripping the headboard so he can angle himself in the best position possible

it’s like he’s trying to prove himself by wrecking you

in the midst of your fucking, just when you feel like youre about to pass out, bakugo’s head falls on your shoulder

he’s still thrusting into you, but it gets slower and deeper

needier

now it’s not just fucking

looks into your eyes with the most adoring gaze and kisses the breath of out you

he can’t speak, too deep into your lovemaking to express how much he loves you

how he’s so scared of losing you

but you don’t need his words to understand

lock your legs around his hips and tell him how you’ll always be his and he will let out a moan that makes your toes curl

when you reach your high, it’s a vulnerable moment

lots of soft kisses and hugging

wont admit to the tears that sting his eyes but is willing to express his adornment for you through his embrace and aftercare

Todoroki Shouto:

SFW

todoroki doesnt have a lot of experience with jealousy

he knows what anger is

he’s felt insecurity

and he knows what it feels like to long for something or someone

but envy was a foreign concept to him

that was until he got into his first romantic relationship with you

don't get him wrong, he trusted you with everything

you gave him no reason to question your loyalty

and it never occurred to him that you would leave him for someone else because of how strong your love was for one another

however, his insecurities always got the best of him

he had a lot of baggage

he knew that

and when someone would approach you, someone that looked free-spirited and independent, he’d wonder if he was holding you back

even then, he can’t help but think that no one is worth the ground you walked on

not even himself sometimes

he never brings it up

but you notice that he started touching his scar a lot more

todoroki would try to act more extroverted thinking it would be better if he was livelier

youre deep talks about family matter diminished little by little

he tried to fill your comfortable silence with awkward conversation

you were so confused why your bf was acting so different

it took a couple attempts to get him to spill his thoughts

once he did, he’s stark quiet, looking away, fearing that you’d be so disappointed in him

but you just take his face in your hands and tell him

“you’re my whole world shouto. why would i ever give that up?”

he holds you in his arms for a long time after that

NSFW

behind his jealousy of onlooking eyes is a deep steed of low self-esteem

and you can feel it when you get intimate

he’s always looking to please you, but now he’s desperate, trying so hard to think of what will make you feel good

it makes you sad bc he already knows the answer to those questions

but he overthinks it

he’s noticeably shier

his touches are hesitant as he second-guesses himself

is continuously asking if you’re okay or if he’s doing it right

at one point, you have to take charge and push him down on the bed

“let me show you how much i want you. just you”

licks his lips as you kiss down his body

one of those guys that believes sucking his dick is a chore 💀

“you don't have to do that” face ass

so when you suck the soul out of him, he’s SPRUNG

would write a song about it if he could LMAO

quickly says he loves you before kissing you like the world depends on it as you ride him

twirl your hips in the way he likes and he’ll hiss out curses

run your hands through his hair and kiss his scar and he’ll give you such pretty moans

please tell him how beautiful he is and how much you love him

my mans will nut on the spot

after the first round, he regains his confidence and flips you on your hands and knees

before you even know what’s going on, he’s pounding into you, gripping your hips like a lifeline

now that he’s reminded that he’s your man, he spends the night realigning your spine

bc who could do it better?

Togata Mirio:

SFW

mirio is one of the most confident people ever

not only is he secure in himself, but he’s secure in your relationship

he knows he bagged a baddie

ofc people would be all over you

he couldn't blame them! i mean, look at you!

when people approached you, he usually let you handle it

if they were persistent, he would just put an arm around your waist

“you’ve got good taste, but they’re taken! sorry!”

it’s so wholesome that the other person can’t even find it within themselves to be upset

there was only one time he recalled getting genuinely jealous

it was during the time you two weren't exclusively dating

just going on dates to see how things went

at the same time, he overheard from your friend that your ex was trying to get back with you

when he heard that, he started sweating

it wasn't jealousy, but more like fear

he was determined not to lose you

not when things were going so well

mirio literally goes above and beyond on your dates

mans deadass learns how to cook all your favorite foods to bring to you

youre crying bc the seasoning was just *chef’s kiss*

brings you flowers at random times of the day

sends you pictures of things that remind him of you

you’re just soaking up all the attention

he’s always been an extra person so you didn't think much of it

it wasn't until you two were cuddling and watching a movie in his apartment that he confesses to you

“i know that i’m competing against history between you and your ex, but i want you to know that my feelings for you are strong, y/n. and i’ll do everything to prove to you that i can be the man of your dreams”

you stare at him before bringing him in for a kiss

“there’s a reason my ex is my ex”

“but--”

“just ask me to be yours already, mirio”

he didnt have to be told twice

NSFW

it was actually that same night that cuddling turned into something a little nastier

honestly, from then on, if you cuddled for more than 20min, there was a 99% chance yall end up fucking lmao

but that night, when he was kissing your neck and grinding his dick against you, he noticed your phone light up on the nightstand

you were too caught up in his fingers between your legs but he saw the text from your ex

it read: “i know this might be out of the blue, but would you wanna catch up over dinner sometime?”

now, mirio wasn't one to be spiteful

but he couldn't help but get a little heated

knowing your ex was trying to get back with you was way different than seeing it

a tiny switch goes off in his head and now he’s ready to make it known that you and him are together

you’re in heaven as mirio’s lips suck and nip at your neck and body

his head game is immaculate

turns you on your stomach so he can massage your back and ass before sliding into you

mirio holds your neck and gives you sloppy kisses as his hips swim into you

your phone lights up again and you can barely think straight when he gets rougher

starts pounding into you like he’s tryna put a baby in you whether it’s possible or not 💀

youre grabbing for anything you can hold as he starts whispering sweet nothings about how he’s gonna take care of you

whew...what a man yall 🥴

the entire time he’s wearing a shit-eating grin

bc he knows he won

might have accidentally sent your ex a voice recording of you moaning his name

oops

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jadegrey711 · 3 years

Text

I Wasn’t Expecting That (Part 2)

Eric Northman X Fem!Reader

A/N: Hello my loves! So a while back I posted the first part of this oneshot with Eric Northman and I got a few comments saying they wanted a part two which I definitely wasn’t planning on doing but in one of my insomnia episodes I came up with the plot for part two! Be warned it’s super angsty which is a rarity coming from me.

*NOT MY GIF*

Word Count: 1487

If you like my stories you can check out my sideblog @jadegreywriting to see all of them and my masterlist without filtering through my main blog.

Soundtrack Inspiration:

-Cruel World: Active Child

-Cold: Aqualung, Lucy Schwartz

- I wish I knew: Shron Van Etten

I own all rights to this story and do not give permission for my stories to be published, translated or reposted anywhere else. The only places I have published my stories is here on Tumblr and on my AO3 account (LadyAuthor711)

Everything around you was dark. Dark and suffocating. You felt like you were coated in that darkness as it laid heavily over every inch of your skin, over your mouth suffocating you, and your eyes as it blinded you further. You felt the fear get the best of you as you started to claw your way out of the darkness, you felt it as it clung under your fingernails. You tried to blink it away as it got in your eyes but there was no use, you let your panic guide you through the cloying darkness as you finally broke free and saw the face of your own personal heaven; Eric.

You felt your chest relax a bit at the site of his smooth face, his blue eyes wide with worry. Maybe this truly was heaven and even here in this heavenly place, they let you have your monster.

He held his hand out for you to take, a small smile starting to form on his face at the sight of you.

“Eric.” You whispered, hearing just how rough your voice sounded to your own ears and reached your hand out to take his. But when you did you were startled at how solid it felt under your hand. With your hand still in his you turned his hand around examining it, his touch felt so real like he was actually here. Then you felt it.

Hunger.

A deep chest aching hunger rushed through you, you shook your head in confusion and watched as the small smile on Eric’s face faded as he watched you put the pieces together.

“Y/N.” He whispered softly, like you were a frightened animal he was trying to coax from falling over a ledge.

You let go of Eric’s hand and turned your head to look back at what he had just pulled you out of. A hole.

“No.” You whispered. Looking at the massive hole where you just clawed your way out of and then back to Eric. And you finally saw the dirt he was covered in.

“Y/N. I can explain but first you have to eat.” He said in a firm but still soft voice and pulled a blood bag from behind his back.

“Oh God, Eric.” You whispered, feeling tears coming to your eyes. And the memory of your final moments came back to you. The feel of the bullet tearing through your chest, your heart slowing, and Eric’s voice roaring as you faded into that sweet darkness.

You looked down at yourself and saw the blood that coated your shirt right where your heart was. You felt that panic washing over you again in waves as you frantically tried to find the bullet hole. You teared open your shirt and clawed at your chest trying to find it, hoping that this was some sort of sick joke.

Eric reached his hands out to stop you. But you slapped him away. “Y/N. Let me explain, please.”

“You didn’t Eric!” You shouted, feeling the tears stream down your face as all the pieces came together.

Shame crossed Eric’s face.

“Please Eric, tell me you didn’t. That you didn’t do this to me!” You screamed, rubbing the tears from your eyes but stopped cold as you looked at your fingers. They were covered in blood. You truly were vampire now, blood tears and all.

“Y/N.” He said, reaching for you again and this time not letting you stop him as he enveloped you in his strong arms. But you couldn’t stop looking at your fingers.

“Oh my God.”

“You couldn’t understand why I did it.” he said softly against your dirt covered hair. “One minute you were by my side and then the next you were jumping in front of me, taking a bullet in the heart. Pam told me you were too far gone, but-”

You cut him off, pushing at his chest and surprising yourself when you were able to push him away. “You were selfish.”

Eric looked pained at that. “I couldn’t just let you die Y/N! You had so much life left to live and… and I just couldn’t bear the thought of it being ripped away from you.” “And you call this living? Feeding off of people and living in darkness?” You watched as Eric ground his teeth. “I died saving you!” You shoved at his chest again and felt a small amount of satisfaction at watching him stumble. “I took a bullet for you and this is what you do!” You shouted and shoved at Eric again and he let you. He let you get all of your anger out as you continued shoving and punching his chest.

“I died a hero’s death and then you turn me into a fucking monster!” You screamed, giving Eric one last punch hard enough to knock him to the ground. You felt your shoulders sag and then you fell to your knees, letting your blood tears fall to the ground. You felt like all your energy had been sapped out of you, you knew it was the hunger but you dreaded knowing that you’d have to feed.

Eric was already back on his feet and standing in front of you. “I know I was selfish. But, there is no life for me without you, Y/N. There never will be and even if it takes years for you to forgive me I will be right there until you do.”

“What if I never forgive you?” You asked your voice calm and even as you looked up at his pained face.

“Then that’s your choice. I’ve taken enough of your choices.”

Both of you were silent as you stewed over your choices.

“Before you decide to hate me forever can you please just eat. You maybe vampire now but you’ve had nothing to eat and you're weak.”

You shook your head. “I don’t want that.”

“Y/N.” he said in a firm voice.

“Fuck Eric! Lay off! I’m covered in blood and dirt and I’m going to retch at the idea of drinking that right now. I just want to wash everything off of me. Okay?”

Eric just nodded and held out his hand again for you to take.

**** You sighed softly at the feel of the shower washing off all the dirt and blood that was still on you from last night. You watched as the blood swirled down the drain, the last remnants of your human life being washed from you.

You turned the shower up, feeling that your skin was still cold but you still didn’t feel the warmth of the shower seep through your skin. So, you turned it up hotter and hotter. But still you felt nothing as you stood there under the scalding water but you were still cold on the inside.

You don’t know how long you had been standing here in that shower, but without realizing it you saw Eric’s hand reach past the shower curtain and turn down the water before he stepped inside himself. He was naked but there was nothing sexual between you as he climbed into the shower and grabbed the shampoo and started washing the dirt from your hair.

He was gentle as he covered your eyes and washed the soap from your hair then grabbed the conditioner and began to repeat the process. All the while he whispered to himself in another language but you couldn’t be bothered to find out what he was saying.

There was a time when you dreamt about your life with Eric and how it didn’t matter how happy you were with each other there would always be a time when you’d have to say goodbye to one another. Whether it was a few years down the line or in death. But, now there would be no goodbye unless you decided to leave him and you were pretty sure that even if it would kill him he would let you go this time. Like he said, he had taken enough of your choices.

You were tired of being angry, tired of thinking about what your life would be like now. You knew why he did it, and honestly you couldn’t say that you wouldn’t do the same for him, you did take a bullet for him. You just wanted to enjoy the feel of Eric’s hands on you again, wanted to enjoy the fact that you could hold him again.

So, you turned in his arms and wrapped your arms around his waist holding him tight. You heard his small sigh as he wrapped his hands around your head and held you as he stroked your wet hair.

You both had a lot to discuss for the future and maybe that future didn’t include Eric but right now you wanted to enjoy the first spark of warmth in your chest you felt all night.

#eric northman x reader #eric northman x fem!reader #eric northman x you #eric northman #eric northman imagines #eric northman oneshot #true blood oneshots #true blood imagines #true blood #jade tries writing #jadegrey writes #my writing #this is angsty as fuck people #angst #eric northman angst

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matchamorphosis · 3 years

Text

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ 𝐡𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐲𝐬𝐮𝐜𝐤𝐥𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐧𝐞, 𝐦𝐲 𝐝𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐦𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐝𝐢𝐯𝐢𝐧𝐞

𝐦𝐲 𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐲𝐛𝐨𝐨𝐤 | ღ | 𝐦𝐲 𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭

𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲 || what seems to be a normal rich summer morning with the women who lives across the honeysuckle boulevard from his cottage lies something else. a buttery rich feeling that spreads deep within Bucky’s heart as he takes his neighbor, alongside Alpine to the farmers market for coffee.

𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞 || fluffy fluff! ➳ part one

𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 || retired!bucky barnes × neighbor![black//woc]reader

𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭 || 3K ➳ 𝐝𝐢𝐯𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐭 || @firefly-graphics

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 || if you think long walks with bucky and alpine in the sunny countryside are warnings then so be it but there is lots of food mentioned. ღ also reader owns a flower shop, not a warning thought just some info!

𝐬𝐨𝐧𝐠 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐭𝐬 || this version of cherry wine by hozier ღ this version of mystery of love by sufjan stevens ღ

𝐰. 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞 || eeeeep!!! so this is my first bucky with alpine fluff and i’m very glad to have it be the first for my fluffy mini series that i’m doing for this month! ღ I don’t describe reader too much throughout the story but what is clear is that I don’t specify on skin tone but yes the person in the moodboard is a woc! ღ anyways I hope you cherubs enjoy reading! ღ

+ p.s || do not repost, republish or plagiarize my work on any other fanfic platform such as: wattpad, ao3, tumblr, etc or steal my work all together. do so and i will rip your spine from your scumy asshole and shove it down your talentless throat. ♡♡♡

it was a lavish affair when Bucky found himself tangled with you in the bed of a million perennial petals.

clothing falling and bodies twisting themselves against each other in not lust but emotional apprehension. the soft petals of rose, carnation and violet keep pouring like blissful rain, entangling in his hair and in the crooks of your body.

enough to suffocate but enough to make him feel enveloped in the fantasy- the divination of you you you and only you.

for you are butterscotch benevolence that he will let pool like ambrosial nectar in the cavernous hollows of his collarbones. your tears of seventh heaven euphoria trickling onto his skin forming constellations- like the paint speckles on the forlonged artists canvas of his naked soul.

you are honey sunlight oozing from the basin of the candy floss sky, lacing with the shedding petals that continue to powder in their divine scent and morality. his fine pink sheets soft and silky as the rose petals of Heliogabalus, he’d sigh in heavenly pleasure to be buried alive in petals if she was drunk of the love he has for her.

he sees her playing, singing, dancing and bringing her virtuous spring song deep within the glossy shine of her honey hive eyes. love seeping in the melancholy streams leaking through the old creeky floorboards of his home and straight into the chambers of his heart.

so promising yet so grandeur as he feels his chest warm with her very touch, the ivory bow encased in the virtuous flowers of her emblem garden in his hands- he’d think that he was Cupid but oh how he’s been struck by his own arrow in great surprise. straight into the once extravagant chamber of his heart.

the spiraling golden arrow destined to pierce and rip through the tender muscle of breast to the beating vessel that writes a tragic tale of eternal ravishment in the movements of lyrical beats. muttering with languor-glazed lips, he’d keep her love like a an old locket against his chest for it’s what reminds him of home whenever he feels the cold element on his skin.

there are pieces of you scattered in the wonderous arteries of his heart.

nestled in the folds of the beating muscle, take heed.

for that is his home.

y/n is his perennial feelings left unsaid, exquisite pain yet ethereal serenity. his soft bed of roses and his deadly golden arrow, all meant to give his heart hope.

that he was- however it seems the bed of roses and all the lovely elements it holds have come to a staggering pause.

now as the sun hits the past super soldiers eyelids that dream of flower petals and the heavenly vision of you disappear. they flutter open to meet the single stream of sunlight that has slipped past the slit of the sheer bedroom curtains. brightening up the somewhat clustered space of the room with its single golden string.

Bucky sighs in defeat, this is the fifth dream he’s had of you in a month and he was barely pushing past the second week of May. before he didn’t mind the dreams, they calmed his mind while he layed in slumber during the thunderstorms of April but now they were resilient. it wasn’t no regular thing to dream about the women across the boulevard in the haven of flower fields and maple trees.

Bucky knew this but he couldn’t help but not treat these dreams sweetly. they were the definition of sweet torture, you never hurt him in those dreams as he did to himself but it was a pain to know that you probably don’t think of him the same way. for goodness sake ever since he and Alpine moved the only interactions he had with the maiden were just acknowledgments as they passed each other on their daily errands.

he shouldn't be this infatuated with someone who he's only met.

the soft hum of a purr finally awakens Bucky, his cats paw brushing against the half covered skin of his fleshed bicep. it takes a pat or two to make Bucky open his eyes to find Alpines blue hues staring back at his and he gives his furry friend a crooked smile. a chorus of meows welcoming him to another sunny morning in the peaceful and harmonious countryside.

“morning pal, ya slept well?” Bucky smiles as he lazily lifts his hand to scratch the right spot behind Alpines ear.

stretching out of bed till his feet touch the cool wood flooring, following the simple path from the bedroom to the kitchen he pours Alpine his dish of cream and gets started on his own breakfast. whisking hen eggs his neighbors from afar gifted him the day before and toasting the freshly baked loaves of bread he bought specially from the market yesterday.

Bucky normally didn’t take any gifts from anyone, he wasn’t that type of person to feel comfortable with those sort of things but as the days gone by the cheerfulness of the communities welcoming energy towards him has soften his doubt.

eating his simple breakfast paired with coffee, Bucky bites into his buttery egg toast whilst quickly scribbling down his to-do list for the day. of course there isn’t any tasks that the hundred and ten year old man has to get done but there were things that Bucky did look forward to ever since he settled in a month ago. the country was a lovely peacefulness he had forgotten about ever since he was a boy.

traveling to his grandparents farm away from the city for memorable childhood summers in the sun and fields. turning his head to meet the white linen sheets that draped over the kitchen panels, Bucky can see the herd of brown and black spotted cows from the distance. tapping the pencil against the shiny polish of the kitchen table he bites his lip on what else to add on.

his head lifts up to see through the other window that casts its lovely light against his paper. blue eyes meeting the toffee cobblestone path that led to her cottage, hidden amongst the shrubbery of acorn trees and flower budded bushes. hearing from lots of locals in the cobblestone village near the sparkling sea that she owns a little orchard of peach and cherry trees, a few strawberry patches amongst the vegetation.

it made sense why he sometimes finds a large wooden basket of those ruby fruits at his doorstep from time to time. a card inviting him over for some tea that he would agree to yet he would always call you the next day a stuttering mess canceling it over some important errands. nonetheless it made Bucky's heart swell how understanding you were, sweet just like the ripe fruits you pluck for him on Sundays.

Bucky would make copplers and sometimes pies out of them and if he wasn't so scared of the possibility of being too attracted to you he'd head over to your place so he and him would eat them in your gazebo. but of course he can't do everything his heart implores him to do. was it bad to want to get to know you and imagine what it would be like to befriend you?

maybe do lots more than just befriend you...

sometimes he would find a glimpse of your form in the distance as he headed for the lake neat the lavender fields up north to fish something for dinner. humming while you cared for your flowers, singing to them as you danced along the vintage radio. Bucky could see himself singing and dancing alongside you. caring for your precious tulips, primroses and other beautiful flowers that you sold.

those pretty flowers sweet and divine just as her lips and voice when the two first met, when he arrived in the too expensive car that stood out amongst the scenery. arms occupied with bouquets upon bouquets of trimmed flowers that practically shielded her face, his body ran straight into yours when he got out of his car. flower petals falling with the impact and him apologizing one thing led to another and he helped her with her bouquets all while being stricken when he got a clear look at her.

a clear look at you.

lovely in your sundress that flowed beautifully against your bodies soft planes, there was something about the sparkle in your eyes that made him start to stutter. something about you that made his heart bloom in a recherché flower he still can’t understand because he can still hear the velvety tone of your voice speaking your own name when giving each other’s your introduction.

from there on out a glowing ember of clustered stars burned in the pit of his belly when you spoke his name and he spoke yours. it was soft and innocent as the flowers in your arms but the introduction was cut off far too short for Bucky's liking but he promised you a coffee when he was completely settled in. having to do something so he could see you again cause oh how he wishes to hear you speak his name again and again and again till the flowers sprout, bloom and decay with each coming season.

maybe he should pay you a visit and bring up that coffee...

the music from the radio filling the bright cottage kitchen sweetly alongside the birds singing their song outside. Alpine takes his seat across from him, yawning over the new day that brings nothing but lazy laps and baked fish treats. forking a few honey drizzled raspberries in his mouth, Bucky walks to the front door and just in time the daily paper plops down on his feet from the passing paper boy whipping through the grassy roads on the shiny steel of a ringing bicycle.

bending down to retrieve the newspaper, he passes through the sidewalk of petunias and violets till he reaches his mailbox. the wood creaky and the metal rusty but the daisies that sprinted around the opening was a pretty site to see before Bucky grimaced at people from the outside world wanting to invade his privacy. grabbing the letters before smelling the sweet daisies, Bucky looks through the letters one by one. ripping some that had no use for to be used as fire food for his fireplace, grunting that even though he’s away from the tabloids and cameras there are still people eager enough to want something from him.

a soft voice from the distance pulls him out of his annoyance, it makes his eyes lift from his dreaded mail to the women a mile away singing her song as she reaches her mailbox. Bucky can’t help but look at her from afar; and maybe Alpine knows this to as he watch his lovesick owner admire the maiden from the kitchen windowsill.

with some obscene fortune he notices you checking your mailbox as well. heart pacing in his chest, he wishes he didn’t go outside before showering and at least brushing his hair for your waving to him from the distance.

“hello hello Bucky!” your sweet voice exclaims and it just adds onto the heaven that is the morning it makes his cheek hurt from how much he’s smiling.

“hello hello to you y/n. how is the shop coming along?” Bucky shouts and his heart sinks when you wave him over to you.

despite his mind telling him to not pursue closer his heart makes him walk his way to you standing next to your Valentine shaped mailbox. his worries slipping away when there's a underlying comfort in your posture and aura, alluring like the bees are to the flowers. welcoming and warm and he can't help but feel that way every time he's near you.

speaking of you, its reassuring to also know he wasn't the only one to wear pajama's out since your still in your blue silk nightgown. matching silk slippers adorning your feet, you sip from your tea cup as you read what he believes to be a Cosmopolitan.

“it’s coming along great, thank you! a bit slow the first week but that’s how any business starts but I just received my tenth loyal customer and i’m more than certain i’ll be selling lots of flowers today.” you spoke as you smiled to yourself then up at him.

checking your mail, Bucky’s surprised that you have quite a handful of letters and boxes. all written in lovely cursive and packaged nicely, almost like love letters and gifts. it makes Bucky’s heat sink, knowing that he might not be the only one who’s fallen head over heels for you. by all means you probably have the whole village under a spell with just the way you smile alone but he wants to see that smile the most.

he wants to be the reason for that smile.

“that’s sounds wonderful y/n, maybe I could stop by and pick a pretty bouquet or two," you only smile wider upon those words and much to his excitement you even brush your hand against his.

"oh really? have a special someone in your life who needs some loving?" you perk as you open an envelop but the question makes Bucky's throat dry on how he should answer.

you seem like the type of maiden who loves an honest man- yes, he should be honest.

"well... there is this one special lady." Bucky lingers and that makes you snap your attention away from the letters in your hands. voice dying in your throat at those words and heart beat hitting pause.

"I always thought Alpine was gonna be the only one to get to my soft spot- we sleep in the same bed together," he stops to laugh a bit, rubbing the back of neck with his metal arm and you laugh along with him.

"how is Alpine? i'm noticing he's getting into a routine with sleeping in my chamomile beds in the afternoon," you smile and bring your tiny tea cup to your lips. "would you care for a cup Bucky? this just so happens to be chamomile,"

"Alpine is doing good and thank you for bringing that up I was beginning to wonder where that rascal has been leaving for. will have an important talk to him once I get home and- I was going to ask you something," Bucky speaks while admiring how your thick lashes curtain your honey hive hues as you sip the steaming golden liquid.

no one should look that beautiful just drinking tea yet here he is, breathless on the simple action. if he truly wanted a cup he'd wish to drink from your tiny cup, to press his lips upon the porcelain rim where yours once brushed against. drink the sweet sunshine to experience the closest thing to your honey kiss...

"don't worry it's alright! I love looking over at him when I have tea at the back patio, he's quite a lovely guest. very well mannered, and yes Bucky is there anything I can help you with?" you cannot deny that your heart is practically skipping beats in your chest, fast and lively like the flutter of a butterfly wing.

Bucky runs his fingers through his hair, for someone who has done the simple thing of asking someone out for couple hundreds of times a hundred years ago from now it’s a disappointment that he’s lost his touch. however you don’t seem to notice or care but that doesn't mean he should give up. not when you're right here glowing in your morning dew radiance, anticipating the next words to slip past those lips.

it's now or never.

"h-how do you feel about that coffee I promised? today? I have a few errands to run in town and I was wondering if you would accompany me- on my errands... if that doesn't bother you,” Bucky rambles to a stop and he's thankful you're still smiling that closed lip grin against the porcelain of the cup.

"yes Bucky I would love that! there's a coffee cart near the shop I work at but what about your lady? she wouldn't mind us going out for coffee, would she?" you speak as you gather your letters in your arms. glancing up at Bucky to receive some conformation and Bucky bites his lips.

"I don't think she'll mind. in fact... I think she would love me to go out once in a while. I have a habit of only going out when necessary, coffee with you wouldn't hurt,"

"that's perfect, i'll see you at twelve then Bucky. you can help me open shop to," you smiled and Bucky returned an even warmer one back.

filling your heart with a rush of liason, like a tea cup filling with tea. something meant to be full and warm, embraced with someone's touch and lips as they drank each fluttering honey glazed sensation they have for one other.

something that seems to be happening right now before they break their strong eye contact, wiry- crooked smiles still embellishing their sun-freckled faces.

you wish you could kisses each one off his clean shaven cheeks right now, slightly rosy but oh how it would feel like peach skin against your lips.

Bucky wishes to kiss yours, the shine of your lips the form of heart shaped clouds and he just can't seem to get his head out of the amorous blue you cast him into.

"i'll be seeing you in an hour Bucky," you draw before walking away with a cheeky wink, your eyes still locking with his before you get to the rosy sunflower porch.

"and i'll be waiting for you doll,"

♡♡♡ thank you for reading part one! ♡♡♡ pretty please like, reblog and/or comment what you think and if you enjoy this join my taglist to be notified of my future works! ♡♡♡

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chooseyouovereveryone · 3 years

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10 Years Of Songbird: Brittana Fan Project

Hello my fellow Brittana lovers!

First of all, happy 10 years to the iconic Glee episode that is Rumours and the beautifully moving performance that is Songbird. Such a pivotal part in Brittana's story, and one that will forever be ingrained in my mind. Naya's voice still gives me goosebumps and reduces me to tears on that performance, paired with Heather's genuine tearful reaction.

Second of all, this is up slightly later than planned so apologies for that, but Tumblr glitched on me big time and I had to repost this all again which considering I had a draft built up for days, was rather inconvenient, but we’re here now and hopefully it was worth the wait!

Putting this project together has brought me so much joy in revisiting my favourite ship. I don't think I will ever tire of reading about them, and hearing from others why they love them so much and how this ship resonated with them.

For me, Brittany and Santana were the first positive representation I saw of a WLW relationship. I was shook to the core watching their story unfold, in how much it mirrored what was going on in my own life with my own denial and with my own relationship. I found myself clinging to that storyline like an anchor, as if it was going to give me the answers to my own story. Throughout all the confusion I had in my own coming out and realisation that I was a lesbian, the storyline gave me hope that one day, everything would be okay. Watching them go from confused and conflicted best friends to wives gave me so much hope for the future, and now as a 27 year old out and proud gay woman, I still look at this storyline with the same love-filled eyes.

Even as Glee ended and I stepped away from the fandom, Brittana have always been a huge part of my life, always there in the background, always my comfort storyline to turn to and rewatch a bunch of times. But losing Naya last year really brought me back to the fandom and the community and reminded me why I loved them so much.

I think what I love most of all about this ship is how organic it was. It came from the fans, and from Naya and Heather encouraging the writers to take it seriously. Because of this, I also wanted to add in some little touches of Heya, and include quotes from Naya and Heather talking about their fave scenes.

I'll forever be indebted to this storyline in what felt like a really hard and confusing time in my teenage years.

So thank you Naya

Thank you Heather.

& thank you so much to all of you for taking part.

Also a huge shoutout once again to @hopefulobjectmiracle for letting me use her idea and for providing help along the way. She came up with the concept for this project with Klaine, and I wanted to create a Brittana version, but I'd strongly recommend checking out her Klaine one if you haven't already.

I hope you enjoy reading it, as much as I enjoyed putting it together :)

Brittany & Santana Talk To Holly Holliday About Their Feelings- 2x15, “Sexy”

Choosing a favorite scene is hard so I'll choose one of my favorite lines: in the episode Sexy when Santana and Brittany first talk to Holly about their sexuality, Britt says "I don't know how I feel because Santana refuses to talk about it".

I love this line because most people would play it off as Brittany being a simpleton, but that's not the case. Brittany is saying she doesn't know if she's allowed to like Santana as more than her best friend. She doesn't know if it's right. Because if Santana isn't in to girls then Brittany could be crossing a line, a line where she could possibly be making Santana uncomfortable. Brittany obviously knows how she feels about Santana but she wants to make sure Santana feels for her in the same way before admitting to it, as not to ruin what they already have.

-@neversatisfiedwithlife

Landslide- 2x15, “Sexy”

It was incredibly difficult for me to choose my favorite Brittana scene. There are so many that I love and find important to me...some of these moments were even literally life-altering. Before Brittana, for example, I didn't know that girls could be gay, and I had no idea that what I felt for some of my female friends was anything other than platonic. I'm sure I would have realized I was queer eventually, but this ship and the fandom that I found myself in made the process so much easier for me. But I digress :)

I eventually narrowed it down to four choices—Landslide, Songbird, the Heart Locker Scene in New York, and Cherish/Cherish in Heart, and out of these I've decided to single out Landslide as my numero uno, as it was this very scene that started my decade-long love affair with this ship :)

There are so many things that I love about this scene. Earlier in the show we see Brittany attempt to talk about their relationship knowing that they were more than just best-friends-with-benefits, but Santana would instantly close herself off. Still, Brittany pressed on, determined to understand what they had become, while Santana began to realize that what they had—what they could become—was worth letting herself be vulnerable, worth the risk of getting herself hurt. The fact that Landslide was the product of this early struggle gives it so much meaning ;u;

The scene itself has all these details that make my heart ache in the best way possible...the way they look at each other throughout the song, Santana's eyes a myriad of emotions, full of sadness, confusion, conflict, longing, Britt's eyes filled with concern knowing how much it's taking her best friend to be so vulnerable, then the pride that shines through when she looks at Santana after the performance; the way that Santana's voice breaks singing "and I'm getting older, too"; when she stands afterwards and goes over to Brittany, and Britt opens her arms to hold Santana instantly like it's a reflex; the way that they fit against each other so perfectly, like they were made to be in each other's arms...even the visual composition of the scene was perfect ToT That instant of them hugging each other is a study in contrasts with the way Britt's flaxen hair shines against Santana's night-dark head, and with the way Santana's soft white blouse contrasts against Brittany's deep blue denim top ;u; It's gorgeous.

-@randomcanbian

My fav Brittana scene is when they sing landslide together, because it was one of the first times we got to Santana be so vulnerable

-@snowpickles

What is a landslide? Simply put, it’s defined as a collapse of a mass of earth or rock from a mountain or cliff. That’s the perfect way to describe the rocky relationship between Santana and Brittany in S2, and it‘s exactly why their performance of the infamous Fleetwood Mac song of the same name (Sexy; 2x15) is such a pivotal moment in time in for them.

Santana showed a side of herself to her friends, but most importantly to Brittany, that many would deem her incapable of ever doing. For that moment she allowed that brick wall she always had built up around her for protection to come slowly crumbling down. And the best part? She allowed that — wanted that — to happen. She needed to bare her soul to the person she loved most, but she wasn‘t sure how or when, or if she ever could.

Seeing Santana put her heart on her sleeve and confess her feelings of love and admiration for Brittany through song — finally — is one of the highlights of the entire series for me. We see her trap herself within a new world for a few minutes, one that contains only the two of them through her eyes, and let her emotions do the talking. Brittany understood everything without a single word being spoken to her. Santana hadn’t opened up to anyone at this point about how she felt, not even to herself, but so much was understood between them without saying nothing at all. My favorite spoken line is Brittany‘s, „Is that really how you feel?“

As a viewer, it was such an infamous moment because we now get to cheer for them. We see that they are on the same page with one another, that through it all, their attraction and desire for one another never wavered. They wouldn’t be a a couple for quite a bit more time, but they both now understood what we as viewers saw all along. Santana stopped denying her sexuality; she stopped denying what Brittany meant to herself. She still had a lot to sort out and wasn’t ready to free herself from the constraints of her sexuality, but she made the biggest move: allowing Brittany on the other side of that wall with her.

This performance let to the scene we grew to love known as the Hurt Locker, which is the scene that made the Brittana fandom sing praise to the high heavens. Santana felt like she could finally confess her feelings to Brittany. She was terrified, but she somehow found the courage within herself to stop closing the door on opportunities. So, I‘m thankful for Holly Holiday for being the person that Santana and Brittany felt comfortable enough to go to, and I‘m thankful for her willingness to perform with them, because it gave us much more than a song — it gave us hope. It gave us validation. It gave us Brittana.

-@TheWednesdayProject on Reddit

Hurt Locker-2x15, “Sexy”

"A lot of people have said that scene gave them courage to come out to their parents and their friends and their loved ones, so I think that it's something that's very important, and I hope that we handled it responsibly which I think that we did"- Naya (PaleyFest 2012)

Hurt Locker is my fave scene - just Santana finally coming to feel and admit the truth within. I've probably watched it a thousand times and I'll never get sick of it. The expressions and unspoken acting Naya and Heather put into it give me all the feels!

-@chasingseals

Okay so my favorite Brittana scene is probably the scene where Santana express her feelings for Brittany during “sexy” and says she’s afraid to be with Brittany because of the talks and the way people are gonna stare and that she wasn’t even afraid to what people would say to her face but to what people would say behind her back.

And that’s because I feel the same way. I’m not a lesbian, I’m bisexual, but at the moment I have a girlfriend and I am so afraid to come out to even the rest of my family (apart from my parents and sister) because I always hear them talking about these girls with names such as “dyke” or something, and it was good to see on tv someone with the same fears and it is so good to see that they had a happy ending and got married and that all this started when they decided “not to care” about everybody else’s opinions and be themselves and be happy.

-@wankybjtch

It’s so, so strange to do this without Naya, but here we are, and she and Heather made this all so beautiful. When I tried to answer this question about my favorite scene, I went first to Songbird - Naya has one of my favorite voices in this whole world - and then to Landslide, and then to Me Against the Music, and all those answers seemed really good. Brittany and Santana spoke to each other so much through music - voices and words and touch - and Heather and Naya gave themselves to their characters so much - and Naya to song so much, and Heather to dance - that they would disappear into Brittana, and would just seem like they were love, made visible. Brittana is love always seems like such a true thing to say, to me. But while what occurred to me first were three songs, I realized that my favorite scene - the one that hit me the hardest - will probably always be the Hurt Locker.

Naya was just so shining there, Santana so full of love and this terrible ache and this more terrible hope, all for Brittany, that you could see Heather glowing back, though so much more quietly. It was an absolutely tremendous thing to see a full-on love scene playing out in the middle of a crowded hallway. Naya and Heather were so beautiful together, as friends and as actresses and as onscreen lovers, and after seeing that scene for the first time, I cried every day for a week, always at these quiet, unexpected times. The love and the hurt and the fear and the hope were so raw in Santana - both in Naya’s performance and in the beautiful script - that it brought everything back about the confusion of starting out with that Oh, god. I am never, never going to be like everyone else. I love her way, way too much. But somehow, the scene made my whole world feel safer. I could see myself, and others could see me. There we were on the screen, worthy and beautiful. <3 Tess

-@venuscomb

Songbird- 2x19, “Rumours”

"I really enjoyed watching Naya sing Songbird. That's ingrained in my head, that time where I sat in the choir room and listened to her sing Songbird, because her voice is just of another world. It's always been my favorite. I will never forget that."- Heather (Entertainment Weekly 2021)

My favorite moment is Santana singing Songbird to Brittany because that is an all time classic romantic song, and Santana (Naya) sings it beautifully, and Brittany just sits there mesmerized. Plus I love what they are wearing, and how they look. i think it's signifcant that Santana sang her love for her here in the choir room, and it's where they had many of their big moments - first together, the break-up song, the flowers in 5, the proposal.

-@1908jmd

My fav scene is 100% Songbird. It’s always been my favourite song and to see it applied to a wlw relationship changed my life a lot because it made me realise that it could be me one day. Santana was always my favourite character too, so to see someone that i appreciated a lot come to terms with their sexuality made me really happy

-@illegally-luthor

My first fav scene out of two is Songbird of course because seeing Santana pouring her heart out to Britt is just the most beautiful thing ever. She was scared to accept who she really was and when it comes to her love for Brittany she’s not scared anymore because loving her is the easiest thing to do. Plus, seeing how Britt reacted was so beautiful. She knew Santana was scared and she was proud of how she confessed her love, through a song, because she knew Santana wasn’t good with words.

-@chloesnix2b

Heart Locker- 2x22, “New York”

My favorite Brittana scene is after Nationals in 2x22 by the lockers.

What I love most about this scene is Brittanys tell it how it is attitude. When Santana said that it clearly wasn’t about winning for her, Brittany looked right through her bullshit, knowing that Santana was getting defensive, because Santana knew what this year was really about for Brittany (and herself too of course), she just didn’t want to admit to it.

You can clearly see that Santana is still scared and hiding and that she still feels like she’s is going to lose Brittany any moment. But Brittany reassures her, tells her how much she loves Santana and makes her feel safe.

My favorite Brittany is always when she’s finally allowed to have feelings and say something. Often the writers didn’t give her anything to do or just made her a caricature of a person. But when she was allowed to express herself, it was in her truest, most vulnerable form. Due to writing, Brittana often seemed one sided, but it’s moments like these that show us how much Brittany loves Santana and how much she wants only the best for her.

For me, the scene felt like the real beginning. They have been taking baby steps before, treading the water. But now Brittany dove right in and her boldness made Santana follow her :)

"What about you and I?", "I love you Santana, I love you more than I‘ve ever loved anyone else in this world. All I know about you and I is that, because of that, I think anything is possible."

-@bolintheturtleduck

I absolutely love every scene that they’re in together, but my favorite is the one where Brittany and Santana are standing outside of the lockers, talking about the glee club. i feel like it showed a lot about Santana’s character at the time and it really inspired me.

-@hoodiestring

Officially Dating - 3x04, “Pot O' Gold”

Their first official date at Breadstix!

Santana and Brittany sitting in the warm lighting of their favourite restaurant in the almost comfortable awkwardness of their tender baby relationship melted something in my baby lesbian heart.

They're teenaged best friends who fell in love and this scene is just so fluffy and cozy and perfectly reflects their dynamic - they're so obviously head over heels for each other and everything about their relationship feels new and electric and full of possibility, but they've also been love each other forever. Santana's eyes lighting up at Britt holding her hand and Britt being so purely herself and everything about the scene just screams home to me and is the moment the show really became about them to me.

-@grassberry639

One of my favorite scenes is the Breadstix scene with the holding hand under a napkin because I could completely relate to it when I was dating girls that was still not yet 100% ready to come out.

-@charisadrastea

Rumour Has It/Someone Like You- 3x06, “Mash Off”

My other favorite is the Rumour Has It/Someone Like You scene because the performance was so beautiful and haunting.

-@charisadrastea

For me, it was the Adele Mashup (specifically the longing looks exchanged during it). I watched that scene over and over again when I was a kid because I felt like it did a great job of truly encapsulating what it's like to have feelings that you desperately want to pursue but can't do to your surroundings. The whole thing really stuck with me.

Naya's performance felt so genuine and, throughout that entire song, you could really feel what Santana was going through as a closeted lesbian who was terrified of losing everything. And the fact that Brittany was so close during the whole performance and, yet, instead of her singing one of the lead parts with her, they just exchange looks. I just thought it did a great job of expressing a trapped feeling.

-@aaverageperson

The First Time Ever I Saw Your Face- 3x10, “Yes/No”

My favourite Brittana scene would be the small flashback when the girls are singing The First Time Ever I Saw Your Face.

Santana sees Brittany’s face for the first time and she melts.

Their smiles are so soft and I love the instant connection they both have.

-@mostlygleethoughts

My favourite Brittana moment happens when Santana is singing, The First Time Ever I Saw Your Face. She sings the line, “I felt your heart so close to mine,” while a flashback of her and Brittany in the locker room plays. I get teary-eyed whenever I watch this scene. The love between them is so beautiful, and it’s so refreshing to see genuine sapphic love portrayed on screen.

-@sapphicbrittana

Cherish/Cherish- 3x13, “Heart”

It took me so long to decide on what my favorite Brittana scene is but i ultimately decided on the scene at the end of Heart. It’s just such a sweet moment for them. They are openly going on a date and even kiss in front of other people without caring about what anyone might say. They have come so far from the beginning of their relationship and it is just lovely to see them be so happy with each other.

-@sugarcarnation

Ok so my second favorite scene is in 3x13 when Santana asked the god squad to sing a song for Britt. So the scene at Breadstick at the end and the kiss they shared after Cherish/Cherish is just beautiful. Seeing Santana being so proud to call Brittany her girlfriend and singing her song for her is everything to me. Also Britt’s reaction was too cute. The love in her eyes when Joe told them the god squad was going to perform for her is the cutest thing ever. The kiss they shared at the end of the song was so passionate and it gives me butterflies every time I see the scene. It was also the first Brittana kiss we saw onscreen.

-@chloesnix2b

I Wanna Dance With Somebody (Who Loves Me)- 3x17, “Dance With Somebody”

"Watching Heather dance is fun in this number, I never get tired of watching her dance."- Naya (BTS Dance With Somebody)

"They put us in twinzies outfits. We've been singing to each other like crazies"- Heather (BTS Dance With Somebody)

My favourite Brittana scene would have to be dance with somebody (the song). I love how happy they both are and how much fun they’re having together!!! The context is romantic, but they’re also having fun as best friends, which is the root of their relationship. I just think it’s really sweet and I’m a sucker for happy pretty ladies dancing around and making each other ridiculously happy. That’s all!!!

-@kurtanaaa

Tongue Tied- 3x21, “Nationals”

Q: What’s your favourite Brittana moment? A: The slow motion celebration smooch when we won Nationals

-Naya (Twitter Q&A 2012)

Mine- 4x04, “The Break Up”

It might seem strange, to choose a breakup scene for a couple's best. It's a scene that broke thousands of hearts and continues to make us cry, even after having seen the whole journey unfold and even after knowing that Brittana will, in the end, be okay. But to me, it's a scene that encapsulates much of what I love about these two and what they mean to each other. "Sophomore year, I used to sit in this back row and secretly watch you. I counted the number of times you'd smile at me, and I'd die on days that you didn't." Half the reason why I chose this scene is this quote. The sheer power of it still shakes me whenever I hear Santana utter these words. The sincerity behind them makes me stop and truly consider what it is she’s saying. It’s a summary of their journey so far. It’s a moment of incredible vulnerability, the confession of a girl who fell in love with her best friend and was terrified of the consequences of that love. Not as much as she was terrified of what it would mean to not be loved back, though.

But Brittany loves Santana with the same passion, even if it manifests differently. It’s why she holds on as long as she can and why it’s even harder for Santana to face their issues. Because you see, I understand that many dislike the reasoning behind their breakup and that it only happened here because everyone else was doing it. But there’s something so deeply caring about the way they consciously make the decision not to hurt each other by leaving themselves in this in-between state of long-distance relationships. Something so genuine about the way they say they would never cheat on each other but also something so mature in realizing that they can’t be what the other needs right now. That, to me, displays such a pure form of love. As pure as catching glances and counting smiles in the back row. As pure as words of encouragement and saying to someone: I'm yours.

Even though they were already inseparable in sophomore year, Brittany smiling at Santana during Glee practice is an intimate moment that meant everything to her. And even though it hurts, Santana letting go of Brittany before they can even think of hurting each other is such a deep declaration of love. What makes it bittersweet yet hopeful instead of just being heart-shattering is the way Santana turns the otherwise optimistic and romantic song “Mine” into a sad one, creating one of the show’s most gorgeous solo performances in the process. Because when she sings Brittany is the best thing that’s ever been hers, we all know it was true in sophomore year, it is true now and it will be on the day they exchange vows. Because Santana’s right when she sings they’re gonna make it, even if it takes a while. Even if they are (and we are) crying right now, even if it takes a few more days of dying in the absence of Brittany’s smile lighting up her world. Because even when they’re breaking up, Brittana reaffirm that they’ll always love each other the most.

-@tuiyla

Santana Walks Brittany Out Of The Auditorium One Last Time- 4x22, “All Or Nothing”

“I really liked the moment in the last episode, when we knew that Brittany was going away and it was a really sad vibe and Santana showed up and just took her hand and walked her off, I thought that was sweet.”- Naya (Perez Hilton 2013)

Valerie- 5x12, “100”

My favorite scene by a pretty wide margin is “Valerie” from “100”. It’s got that palpable backstage chemistry that Naya and Heather had that shone through so clearly in season 1, it’s poetically choreographed, and the songs even more lyrically significant than before.

I believe that Santana and Brittany are at their best and most smitten when they’re doing what Naya and Heather love the most: singing and dancing, respectively. This is no exception. Just look at Brittany trying not to smile at the beginning. When the shot is on her after Santana starts to sing, you can see her face change from smiles to grimace as if she had forgotten herself. You can’t tell me Heather didn’t break there for a second.

Every little mannerism throughout the whole sequence is laced with that fun, alarmingly pure energy. It could’ve been just excellent acting, but it felt so real. And why wouldn’t it? Naya had to learn Heather’s dance from “Sectionals”. Watching your best friend pull off some of your most iconic moves and then joining in, that’s gotta be fun.

Yeah, Santana’s dancing the choreography from their sectionals with Mike. Within the capacity of an untrained dancer, of course. She’s trying to get Brittany back into the groove by dancing probably the most involved number that the New Directions have ever done. And one that Brittany probably had the most fun with because she choreographed it with Mike. That’s some good writing. And it works, and it’s cute, but once Brittany joins in, the sequence deviates from the original.

We get this just wonderful moment of Brittany dancing solo centerstage fully embracing her passion. After she gets her moment, she and Santana dance either with each other swing-style or towards each other. You can’t forget about that embrace at the end when Santana sort of dips her. They’re not even back together at this point. Santana doesn’t want to get back together at this point. But I feel like I’m watching them dancing at their wedding 3 hours into the reception.

And I mean what an appropriate song to use given the circumstance. “Valerie” is about missing an ex after coming back to your hometown. When we heard Santana solo it at sectionals, it wasn’t super meaningful. It was an excellent way to show off Santana’s vocals and Brittany and Mike’s choreography somewhat independently. But here? Let’s talk about line distribution.

First verse, Santana sings solo. Notably, Brittany is harmonizing behind her piecemeal. By the chorus, she’s joined with Santana fully. Second verse, she’s soloing, joining the dance and by the end they’re dancing together. They’re singing and dancing about missing each other together.

But the song’s not my favorite part. Not even the dance. Not really. My favorite part is the culmination. Santana and Brittany are participating in each other’s disciplines and passions.

That’s an awesome couple right there. They went from singing and dancing somewhat removed from each other to singing and dancing with each other, and even when they were broken up, they still shared their respective passions with each other effortlessly.

-@leatherzaddy on Reddit

My favorite Brittana scene is Valerie S5. It just feels so significant to me that Santana chose this particular song to get Britt out of her funk. Valerie is special to both of them, it’s the first competition solo Santana ever got and it was the first time we ever got to witness the dance skills of one Brittany S. Pierce.

It was the first time Brittany got to show off how talented she was and how she was so much more than the dumb blonde everyone thought she was. Now, however, no one thinks she’s dumb. Now everyone sees her as just another statistic for MIT.

Santana, however, sees right through that and sees her for who she really is - not dumb, not just a genius, but Brittany, the girl who loves to dance. So Santana picks the same song from the first time Brittany got to show off her dancing to prove to her once again that dancing is what she’s meant to do.

-@hopefulobjectmiracle

Churros Kiss- 5x12, “100”

The infamous churros scene lives in my head rent free. Why? Because we saw a level of confidence in Brittany that we had never seen before and, in that moment, we were all rooting for her for giving us what we knew was right and what we knew we needed. The fans knew Brittana was endgame, Brittany knew, and we just sat back and waited for Santana to realize it as well. (Let’s give her credit: she knew.) We had waited 1.5 seasons for more and we finally got it, mouthful of churros and all.

I love this scene because we see Santana and Brittany a bit older and a lot wiser; Brittany knows that after all the time they had spent apart, Santana is the only one she really wants and she felt like she needed to tell her, to show her, before it was too late. I feel like everything Brittany did in this scene was very spontaneous and on a whim, and it makes it that much hotter.

The kiss. It’s my favorite kiss between the couple by a mile. Brittany put her heart on her sleeve and risked everything and just went in for the kill. You can see the twinkle in her eye right before she leaned in and she didn’t hesitate to show Santana what she wanted. I do appreciate Santana’s hesitancy because of their storyline at the time, but I don’t doubt for a second that she didn’t want Brittany back, too. She was just incredibly cautious, and no doubt, caught by surprise. They had been through so much and had finally found a place in their friendship/relationship where scars were healing and hearts weren’t as broken as before.

You can see in the way Santana looks at her after being kissed, the way in which she listens to her, that the wheels in her head are already turning. We know she knows what Brittany is saying is true. She just has to process what this means for her, for them, for her life back in New York. She’s just putting the scattered puzzle pieces back together, but she knows what the picture already looks like.

The kiss on the cheek? The delicious cherry on top. Brittany, having already been pushed away, one again doubled down on how she felt and so quickly, and respectfully, reminded Santana of that. You can see Santana’s breath hitch during this moment when their faces are so close together, and it’s obvious that her love for Brittany never wavered. As she always was, smitten is her middle name.

Brittana’s entire relationship from S1-S6 can be summed up, for me, with one infamous line spoken by Brittany during the churros scene, “You can’t recreate what you and I have.”

-@TheWednesdayProject on Reddit

The Lilies Scene- 5x13, “New Directions”

I will always remember being a curious and scared teenager. I was almost in high school when Brittana became official and it suckerpunched me. The fear, the anxiety, the angst, the love, all of it was so relatable. Brittana had so many trials and tribulations and they always came out better and stronger both as individuals as a couple. My favorite Brittana scene is the lily scene because it was the beginning of them consciously choosing each other. The growth <3

-@yesandmusicals

My favorite Brittana scene is when Brittany fills the room with lilies for Santana. It really proves that the connection between them is incredibly strong and they understand each other better than anyone else. Their chemistry is off the charts and you can really feel their love for each other through the screen. The way Santana sinks into Brittany like she’s coming home and the way Britt runs her fingers up and down Santana’s arm <3 Everything about it is perfect.

-@santinacedes

I think my favorite Brittana scene is the one in 5x13, where Brittany fills the choir room with lilies for Santana, because that was the biggest time when I could truly feel their love for one another and their support of each other.

-@allweseeisskyforever

The Bedroom Scene- 6x03, “Jagged Little Tapestry”

It's hard to pick one favorite scene because I just love them all. But I'm gonna go with the scene that made me the happiest and that's the bedroom scene before the proposal because it's such an intimate moment between the two of them. They talk about their future together, about how happy they are and of course "I will love you until infinity". I've wanted a scene like that since I started shipping them in season 2. And watching that scene for the first time was one of the happiest moments in my life. And when I'm feeling down I just watch this scene again and everything gets better.

-@brittanaaresoulmates13

Santana proposes to Brittany- 6x03, “Jagged Little Tapestry

My fav Brittana scene is the proposal bc it means so much to both of them. It takes place where they fell in love and there’s so many parts in the song that remind me so much of their past

-@arf128

My favourite Brittana scene is probably Santana proposing to Brittany because the number they do before is fire🔥 and BRITTANA GETS ENGAGED!!

-@pennywarbler

Hallway Scene- 6x06, “What The World Needs Now”

I LOVE THE ‘did I ever tell you that I love you’ MOMENT. The little kiss and the way Santana nudges her head in Brittany’s neck. I love the whole episode, it’s so powerful and as a lesbian I really felt seen and represented.

I love that Santana reminds Brittany of heaven. I love that Brittany loves Santana so unconditionally, that she would do anything to see her happy. Brittany knows that Santana is super happy right now, but she also knows that she really misses her abuela and that she’s sad she’s not coming to the wedding. Britt’s really doing her best for Santana, and that really shows how much she loves her.

I love that we see Santana’s vulnerable side in this episode and I love to see Brittany’s protective side (especially during and after Alfie). Although abuela said she wasn’t coming, I love how the episode ended because it really shows how much Santana has grown and how much love she has in her life right now.

-@sapphosongbird

Brittany Confronts Santana’s Abuela- 6x06, “What The World Needs Now”

After Santana sings “Alfie” to Abuela López as if her life depended on it in hopes that her Abuela would be a part of her life again, we have my favorite Brittana moment. At first, Abuela is confused and shocked to find out that she’s been tricked into seeing Santana sing. Brittany quickly confessed that she did trick her and informed Abuela, but also informed Abuela not only that she is Santana’s fiancée but that she loves her so much that she would do anything for her. Santana is quick to look at Abuela to gauge her reaction. Santana is hoping she has an opportunity to explain and to try to make her see how much she loves and needs Abuela in her life. Santana brings up how much Abuela means to her and how much being raised by this woman has made her a strong woman.

It’s likely that Abulea immigrated from another country. Like many children from immigrant families, they know the sacrifices their family took to her there. Santana likely heard from father (as i think Alma is her paternal grandmother) about the importance of doing good in school (and her education as she values it) and likely heard stories about the many jobs her grandma took. Likely those that are stereotypical like agricultural work, working in restaurants, or working as a cleaning lady. Jobs that were all she could get because of the limits society places on her (Abuela). ( Santana really admires this woman. She lets her know how much in the coming out scene. )

Santana embraces being Latina and holds no apology for being so, and admits that she is bigger and better than the limits society places on her. Santana wants to continue to be bigger and better. She admits that she can’t (or doesn’t want to) do that without Brittany and Abuela. Santana feels she simply exists without them. Perhaps also saying that they give her the strength she needs to be bigger and better. She is oh so hopeful that reminding her of all that will make her Abuela come along.

Unfortunately, it is not enough for Abuela. She reminds Santana that she loves her, but not enough to attend the stop following her beliefs. She adamantly says that girls marry boys and not other girls. It’s a sin in Abuela’s eyes, and she refuses to attend the wedding. What happens next in this scene makes me so proud of Santana. Before this moment, Santana was this scared little girl who hid behind this HBIC persona. In short, Santana struggled to love and accept herself. She dated guys for status. She rejected Brittany for so long and told her she was using her and didn’t love her. She had beards and even wrote a song about a boy. She had confessed to Brittany that she was scared about all the talks and looks she would get from others. She hid her feelings and love for Brittany and pushed her away into another person's arms. While doing so, she was more angry and miserable than she had ever been. She had to witness the girl she loved more than anything be with someone else because she was too scared, and it hurt her. It would take some more time for her to embrace herself fully. Even then, she didn’t have much choice. She was forced into accepting herself because she was outed to everyone in her school, in Lima, and in Ohio (and anyone who stumbled across that campaign ad online). Still, she did eventually get there. It was not easy for her at all, but she got there. She was happy. She surrounded herself with the love of her friends. She grew as a person. She became friendlier, was happier, and she allowed herself to love others (Brittany, Dani). Moving to New York was scary for her, but she did it anyway (with a little shove from Brittany (again, she thinks they helped to make her bigger and better). She helped her friends get a job, auditioned for Broadway, went to auditions, held various jobs, and attended school.

Santana remembered how Abuela taught her to be bigger and better than her school, her city, and her state would ever allow her to be when she was in New York. She was even bigger and better than the limits she had placed on herself, especially when she was in high school. She was determined to make something of herself. Sometimes even doing things that weren’t even her dream.

No matter the years that had passed, Brittany knew that despite Santana saying she was okay and choosing Brittany over everyone, including the woman that meant so much to her, Santana still missed her Abuela. In this scene, unlike the last time when Santana bravely confessed to Abuela about her feelings and was gay by herself, Brittany was there alongside Santana. Brittany quickly stepped in to protect the woman she loved. Despite being upset that things aren’t going as they had hoped, she puts on a brave face and tells Abuela that it is okay if she doesn’t go. With a smile and some spunk, Brittany tells Abuela they don’t want her there. Santana is surprised that Brittany spoke up at first, too.

Brittany, who usually is kind and sweet, had her claws out. She used her genius mind to give statistical facts she’d read about to tell Abuela off. Usually, Santana would know not to speak to Abuela in such a manner. This is likely because Santana knows better. Her Abuela likely taught her to respect her elders or at least always to respect her. When Brittany finishes talking, Abuela expects Santana to apologize and stick up for her, but to Alma’s surprise, Santana doesn’t. Instead, Santana, the girl who was scared to tell her Abuela she was gay because she feared losing her, stood by Brittany, the woman she loved and who had told her Abuela to go on and love herself in a way Santana likely never has and would never dare to.

Santana doesn’t just defend Brittany or stands by her. Santana refers to her relationship with Brittany as love. She uses their love as an example of what love is. Santana, the girl who told Brittany she didn’t love her and that she was nothing more than just sex because Puck was in the slammer, the girl who refused to talk about feelings, and the girl who panicked when Rachel referred to their duet as sapphic romance, told her Abuela that what she and Brittany share is love. She uses the words “real love” to describe their relationship and what they had.

The choice of Santana words is significant. Likely, Abuela empathized the importance of love when it came to family (even if Santana experienced a lot of tough love from Abuela, her dad, and likely other family members like her mom.) all her life. Santana likely had seen a lot of it.

The choice of the word “real” may indicate just how deeply Santana was hurt when Abuela disowned her. We did see her cry in season 3 when Santana came out to her. Still, the choice of words makes me think that Santana felt deceived about family sticking together and loving each other no matter what (something Abuela mentions in this very same episode in the Queso Por Dos segment) because of how quickly things changed when she came out. All it took was a confession and a few seconds for that love to disappear.

It’s possible she viewed what she knew as love before, as fake love, or love that was not unconditional. Santana choosing to use “real love” to describe her relationship with Brittany is Santana saying, “We stick together and love each other unconditionally, unlike you and I or my own blood.”

Santana then says that Brittany is her family. Again, Santana reminds us that she chooses Brittany over anyone. Again, she’s touching on her previous statement that she and Brittany are an example of “real love” or (as Santana believes with all her heart) a family that sticks together and loves each other no matter what. This is a big deal for Santana.

She is coming full circle because, in the early seasons, Brittany didn’t always come first. She often came second or last to status, beards, prom queen, people’s opinions, etc.

Santana, a girl that misses Abuela, the person she wishes would love her again, has reached a point in her life where she loves herself and Brittany so much that she no longer needs her Abuela or her support, love, and approval. Santana knows she has a lot of that already. A lot, a lot.

The next part in this scene is parallel to Abuela and Santana’s previous scene some years prior from season 3 when Santana comes out to her. In season 3, Abuela told Santana to leave her house with no other word after Santana came out. Despite Santana’s pleas, Abuela had had the final say. In this scene, things are different. Instead of faltering and hiding, Santana puts her foot down and stands her ground. She keeps her head high and has the final say (something that I believe Abuela taught her when teaching her how to be bigger and better than what the world was going to give her permission to be), and Abuela had no choice but to walk away without another word.

To finish this scene, Santana leans into Brittany. Brittany comforts her (like I’m sure Brittany did the first time Santana came into Abuela the moment she could (which I believe was as soon as Santana got into her car where Britt was waiting (just in case Abuela wanted to meet her))). Santana knows she can count on Brittany. She is her family now. They stick together and love each other no matter what, even if it means being disappointed when things don’t go as planned.

Had Abuela and Santana never made up, I would have been completely okay with it because this scene shows a lot of growth in Santana.

It makes me feel so proud of Santana. She cared so much about others' approval. She had been so scared of her feelings for Brittany that she let herself be miserable and made others feel that way, too. Santana ended up being bigger and better than the limits she and society places on her. In doing so, she learned to accept and love herself, Brittany, and their family. Proudly so. While she wanted Abuela in her life, she decided to let Abuela go and instead surround herself with her new family, one that had plenty of “true love.” A lot, a lot.

That is freaking beautiful, and I absolutely love it.

(Also, protective Britt is 😍🥰).

-@lylyluvda916

Pre-Wedding Scene- 6x08

Q: Favourite Glee scene ever? A: My wedding! -Naya (Twitter Q&A 2015)

“My favourite scene to film was the wedding with me and Naya. It’s just a beautiful memory that I am so thankful I have during this time. It happened at the same time as I was getting married, and it just felt like a double wedding, if you will, because that was the title of the episode. It just kind of summed up our entire relationship on the show and it felt so real, and so magical, to do that with one of my best friends.”- Heather (Cameo 2015)

After too much thinking, I’ve decided that my favorite Brittana scene is the pre wedding when they’re getting ready and Britt freaks out because Santana sees her before the wedding, thinking it’s a bad luck thing. And then Santana says to her that rules don’t apply to them and that they make their own luck. After that they kiss in the most perfect way. It’s my favorite because by saying that to Brittany, Santana made it clear that no matter what traditions say or people believe, everyone can choose how to be happy.

-@awesome-shipper

My favourite Brittana scene would have to be just the whole wedding episode if i’m being honest aha (i love all the Brittana scenes lol its soo hard to choose haha) because it shows that love is love and that anyone can get married if you love one another doesn’t have to be man and women, it can be women and women or even man and man! Love is love! I love the episode also because they are just soo cute in it lol, like Brittany having all the pre wedding worries and then Santana calming her down, ahhh its just soo cute aha.

-@elmamacca

It’s so ridiculously hard to pick my favourite Brittana scene, when they all mean so much. Each one means something different for them in terms of their story. Though they may lack screen time compared to other couples on the show, their scenes are filled with so many firsts. First time Santana admits her feelings, first time they mention their officially dating, first kiss, first I love you in a relationship when they're both happy...so they’re each special for different reasons. Even the break up has Santana admit for the first time that she had feelings for Brittany way back in Sophomore year (S1). Something that was implied but never verbalised before that point.

It's hard to pin it down to just one. I love 2x15 for the obvious reasons of getting to see Santana admit what was already clear to see. That she loved Brittany. Seeing her finally admit that was just really poignant for me.

Landslide and Songbird hold such special places in my heart. The bravery. The love. Everything. I felt it all.

Heart was the fluff we so sorely craved for 3 seasons, and they finally we got it in the best way, and we got our first on screen kiss (3 times over).

5x12/5x13 had me feeling euphoric because finally after a season of absolute crap they finally got back together. The kiss was amazing, and we got to see Brittany lay it all on the line for Santana and make it clear who her top choice always was deep down.

6x03 was like a treasure trove of pure joy. The softest bed scene ever which I love for, my fav duet from them and ofc the proposal. Seeing Santana so boldly (I felt so proud of her in this moment) declare her love for Brittany in front of everyone (something she once thought she'd never be able to do), and for Brittany to be able to see that after their rocky start of "I'm not making out with you because I'm in love with you and want to sing about making lady babies", was everything! The call backs to Landslide were just ugh, and it really showed how far they had come. Santana’s speech and how nervous she is, plus Britt’s tears and the way she snatches the ring, lives in my head rent free.

6x06 is also like, incredible, and one of my fav ever Brittana episodes. Just the whole damn episode and how domesticated they are, Santana’s bravery, Brittany’s protectiveness, all the soft af dialogue that looks like it’s been plucked straight from a fanfic. The “did I ever tell you that I love you?” “tell me again” scene is one of my all time favourite scenes from them ever, and I can’t with how utterly adorable and playful and in love they are. Essentially, my love for the ship holds no bounds so there are too many “fave scenes” to count. Truthfully, I could write an in-depth analysis about every single one one of their scenes and how it touched me in some way, but I think if I had to pick just one I'd go with 6x08 the pre-wedding scene.

It's their last major "two-shot" scene and I honestly think it captures everything. Not only is it just contextually sweet the way Santana can't wait any longer to see Brittany and the words that she says, and the way Brittany is nervously freaking out, it ties up a lot of their story. Santana says with confidence "you love me, and I love you" after what seems like a lifetime of self-doubt, finally she knows Brittany loves her and no longer has to question that. This is the same girl who begged Brittany to say she loved her back as a scared closeted teenager, and now she's standing in front of her on their wedding day knowing that Brittany loves her without even needing to hear it. But regardless we do get an "I love you so much" from Brittany, unprovoked by Santana, which again is a callback to that heartbreaking 2x15 scene. It was all Santana ever wanted to hear back then, now she gets to hear it so freely on their wedding day. Their wedding day guys!? Nothing can ever top that for me, for them to have that ending to such a imperfectly perfect story, after all the erasure, the angst, the break-up, seeing them with other people, watching Brittany go off to MIT and thinking yep...this ship is done because Heather's never coming back now.

The way Santana manages to calm Brittany and make her see clearly, is everything, and it really shows that yin/yang dynamic that I love so much about them.

Being someone who felt like I was living vicariously through them and seeing them get the ending of all endings and get married which is such a rarity (or certainly was at the time) for WLW ships was EVERYTHING. There's also the kiss (my fav kiss of there's) and the fact that moments later Abuela comes in and finally makes amends with Santana. It was the perfect, happy, full circle ending to a rollercoaster of a story, and nothing will ever get more satisfying than that.

-@chooseyouovereveryone

Full List Of Scenes & YouTube Links

Brittany & Santana Talk To Holly Holliday About Their Feelings

Landslide

Hurt Locker

Songbird

Heart Locker

Officially Dating

Rumour Has It/Someone Like You

The First Time Ever I Saw Your Face

Cherish/Cherish

I Wanna Dance With Somebody (Who Loves Me)

Tongue Tied

Mine

Santana Walks Brittany Out Of The Auditorium One Last Time

Valerie

Churros Kiss

The Lilies Scene

The Bedroom Scene

The Proposal

The Hallway Scene

Brittany Confronts Santana’s Abuela

Pre-Wedding Scene

Top 5 Scenes

Each of them had 3 responses each.

Landslide

Hurt Locker

Songbird

Lilies Scene

Pre-Wedding Scene

Season Breakdown

Season 2, Season 3, Season 6 (5 scenes each)

Season 5 (3 scenes)

Season 4 (1 scene)

Season Popularity By Number Of Responses

Season 2 (12 responses)

Season 3 (9 responses)

Season 6 (8 responses)

Season 5 (6 responses)

Season 4 (1 response)

Thank you all so much for reading, participating, sharing etc. I really hope you’ve enjoyed it!

#brittana #brittany and santana #glee #gleeks #glee brittana #glee brittany #glee santana #santana lopez #brittany s.pierce #brittany pierce #rumours #10yearsofbrittana #10yearsofrumours #brittana fan project #brittany x santana

112 notes · View notes

saxxxology · 3 years

Text

Freedom | oneshot

PAIRING: Sam Winchester x Reader WORD COUNT: 2,446 WARNINGS: spoilers for “Inherit the Earth,” character death, drinking to cope, minor trauma processing, smut, post-sex feels, stress/anxiety NOTE: This fic is set post 15x19 - “Inherit the Earth.” Do not save or repost my work without my consent. This work is 18+ only.

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“So we’re free.”

Sam glances up, casting his eyes over the rim of his beer bottle to where you’re perched on the edge of the counter. Legs slightly parted under the hem of your knee-length nightshirt, back slouched, eyes boring into him like you can see right through his skin and into his soul.

“Yeah.” He clears his throat. “Chuck’s gone, Jack’s… doin’ his thing, I guess. There’s nobody calling the shots for us anymore.”

You hum, tipping back your bottle of vodka to take a long swallow. The clear alcohol burns your throat, and you let out a sigh that turns warm in your chest. “Where’s Dean?”

“Holed up in his room.” Sam swipes his tongue over his teeth. “He hasn’t really been able to process Cas, I figured we could give him a few days.”

“Yeah.” You swallow thickly and raise the bottle to your lips again. “Fuckin’ Cas, man.”

“I know.” Sam chuckles. “He was one of the good ones.”

You nod in agreement. “I’ll second that.”

There’s a long silence, interrupted only by the dull clink of glass on metal, the swish of liquid in an almost-empty glass, and a repetitive shuffle of paper as Sam flips absentmindedly through a two-day-old newspaper.

“How are you?” you ask, eager to break the quiet. Sam’s eyes flicker up to you once again, and you shift a little on the counter. “I’m just asking because you haven’t said much since we got back.”

Sam tightens his lips and takes a deep breath. “I don’t know, really. I feel numb. Like, I don’t know if it just hasn’t hit yet, but… yeah, I feel numb.” He rolls his shoulders back and downs the rest of his beer in a single swallow.

“Same here.” You sniff, screwing the cap back onto the tall vodka bottle and setting it aside. “I’m so tired of it. Dean said Cas died and I felt nothing.”

“You’re in shock,” Sam excuses, “and we’ve been dealing with so much shit, we can’t process all of it at once. Cas deserves to be… he deserves for us to grieve for him, without thinking about anything else.”

You chew on your lower lip, surveying him as he rubs his forehead with one hand. He’s tense, the relief of having Chuck gone only half-there. All three of you are used to things being too good to be true, only for shit to hit the fan right after you’ve booked a beach vacation or a weekend in Vegas.

But hell, you deserve to take a little bit of this newfound freedom for granted. Besides, it’s been a while since you had the time or energy to get laid. Sam’s hot, you’re needy… one night of not considering fallout from anything might be nice.

“Sam?”

“Hmm?”

You take a quick breath, leaning back to brace one hand just behind your hip. “If I asked you to fuck me, would you?”

He stiffens, unable to keep his gaze from drifting over to you. He looks beat; tired and lost and just a little scared of the world. For a second you regret asking, thinking he might just say no and get to blame it all on the alcohol.

“I…” he blows air through his lips as pink stains his cheeks. “Are you drunk?”

“Not really.” You speak a little too soon, as your focus begins to drift and you blink twice to clear your vision. “Well, maybe not enough.”

“No, don’t drink any more.” Sam stands up, abandoning his empty bottle on the table as he shuffles over to you. The toes of his boots drag on the polished concrete floor; he’s so cautious about it, like he’s scared to indulge in something other than people prying him for answers or questions. He hates selfishness, and taking this, taking you… it’ll be the ultimate self-indulgence that he may or may not come out of feeling like he deserved it.

“You scared of me?” you tease, tipping your head back as he leans a hip against the side of the counter.

“Never.” He chuckles softly. “You really okay? You want this?”

You lick your lower lip. “Am I ever okay?”

“That’s true.” He sighs heavily, raking his eyes down the column of your neck, over your nipples pressing through the dark blue fabric of your shirt, your stomach, the rise of your thighs, and then right back up to yours…

It’s like he’s a virgin all over again, you think to yourself. He needs a little help getting into it.

You reach for his hand. He lets you take it, guiding his fingers under the hem of your nightshirt. The tips of his fingers are still cold, chilly from his beer, and you shiver a little when he guides them against the inside of your thigh, creeping closer and closer to your core.

He inhales sharply through his nose when his fingers slip against the smooth, warm lips of your pussy. Your thighs part a little more, and you let out a little sigh when he takes the lead, nudging the tip of his index finger down into wet heat.

“Why are you not wearin’ any panties?” he asks.

You arch an eyebrow. “Why are you questioning it?”

He chuckles, bracing his free hand on the metal countertop next to your hip, and slips his fingers a little farther into your folds. You shimmy a little to encourage him, and he lowers his head, the tip of his nose pressing against your cheek to nudge your head back.

He kisses you hungrily, humming against your lips as you reciprocate eagerly. You can taste the beer on his lower lip, and he deepens the kiss, licking into your mouth as his fingers explore deeper between your legs. He finds your clit, targeting smooth, gentle rolls over it as your hand wanders over the front of his jeans.

“Fuck me,” you whisper, “please, Sam, I need you.”

He growls, stepping quickly between your thighs. “Not here.”

He scoops you up, striding towards the steps and feeling his way into the hall. You wrap your legs around his waist. The door to his bedroom is open, and you giggle when he kicks it shut, lips still glued to yours. He lowers you to the ground, waiting for you to stand still before running his hands under the fabric of your nightshirt.

“Get this off,” he murmurs, stripping it roughly over your head and tossing it to the floor. He palms your tits, thumbs rubbing over your nipples, and you arch into the sensation, pulling at the buttons of his flannel, popping each metal clasp until he can shrug it off. He cups your face with both hands, pushing his hips closer as you tug at his belt. His jeans fall to the ground with a dull thud, leaving him in just a pair of navy blue boxers.

He pulls back when you slide a hand into the waistband of his boxers, wrapping your fingers around the hard length of his dick. His pelvis jerks into your touch, and you grin up at him, stretching up onto your toes to claim his mouth in a deep, dirty kiss.

“Condom,” he whispers, “in the nightstand—”

“No,” you reply breathlessly, “I’m on the pill.”

Sam smirks, his hands sliding down to grope your ass. “That works, too.”

He kisses you hard, lifting you up just enough to dump you on the bed. He crawls over you eagerly, reaching down to stroke himself, and you whimper when the thick tip drags through your folds.

He sinks inside with a loud sigh, fisting his cock to push deeper as you squirm underneath him. Your knees fall open, giving him as much room as possible, and his hand falls beside your waist to brace when he gets himself deep enough to thrust comfortably.

Your nails dig into his hips on the first deep, desperate grind. He hisses at the sting and presses an open-mouthed kiss to your lips, panting hard as he thrusts into a rhythm that has the frame of his bed shuddering under the force.

He feels like heaven. Thick and hot and hard as his belly slides against yours, skin already dotted with sweat. His hand comes up to cup your face, fingers curling against your hair as his lips dot a line down your throat, over your chest, and then wrap around a swollen nipple. Your head falls back against a pillow, and you plant your toes firmly against the mattress for leverage. He grunts when you push up against him, allowing him to move even deeper inside until he bottoms out.

“Stay right there,” he mutters. He heaves himself up in one smooth motion, eyes locking on your face as he drops his entire weight into his thrusts. The loud slap of flesh on flesh echoes through the room, and you’re unable to stop your gasps and moans when you feel the ache of it. He grabs your wrists when you try and touch him, pinning them down on either side of your head, and you let out a long sigh of his name that earns a feral growl in reply. The roll of his hips changes when you squeeze around him, deep scoops that have your belly clenching.

“Oh my God, don’t stop,” you breathe, “make me cum, baby, please…”

“That’s the fuckin’ plan.” Sam dips his head to kiss you, and you wiggle playfully in his grip, the tease only making his fingers curl tighter. “You need to touch yourself?”

“No.” You catch a breath when he pauses, lips feather light against yours. “Just keep movin’ like that.”

He chuckles, shifting his weight for balance before resuming the same delicious, expert strokes. His eyes drift down your body until they land between your legs, and he groans at the sight of his cock plunging in and out of your cunt, shiny with your slick.

“Yeah, that’s it, honey,” he murmurs, “c’mon and cum for me.”

You push up against his thrusts, mouth falling open as the hot skin above his dick rubs against your clit. You’re almost there, you can feel it brimming in the pit of your belly, and when Sam’s thrusts turn into hard, bestial shoves, you spiral into bliss, convulsing between Sam’s body and the mattress as he fucks you through it. His grip on your wrists loosens, and you wrap your arms tight around his shoulders, dragging him down on top of you. He slows, then stops, lifting his head from the crook of your neck to press a lazy kiss to your cheek.

“Good?” he asks.

“Yeah,” you reply breathlessly, “you didn’t—”

He stops you with a kiss. “I will. C’mere.”

He rolls onto his back, keeping you close with an arm looped around your waist. You situate yourself on top of him, eyes falling closed as your head spins.

“Whoa, there,” he chuckles, “here, baby, put your hands right here.”

“I know how to ride a dick, dummy.” You arch your back, leaning forward far enough to brace your palms over his shoulders, tits just inches away from his kiss-swollen lips. He huffs, fingers splaying out on your hips as you begin to ride him, rolling your hips and bouncing down on his cock. He grunts, mouth opening in a soft O, and you moan when he gives an instinctive little push of his hips, meeting you halfway as you find your own rhythm.

“Fuck,” he moans, craning his neck to lap his tongue against one nipple. You pull back before he can get a real taste, scraping your nails over his chest as you work him harder, faster, until his soft pants and grunts turn into full-fledged moans.

He cums with a strangled groan, fingers digging into your hips hard enough to bruise. You keep moving, giggling when he arches and bucks underneath you, breathing high in his throat as he crosses the brink from pleasure to overstimulation. Unable to take any more, he pushes you off with a hoarse laugh, and you collapse beside him, giggling with your lower lip between your teeth.

“Fuck, I needed that,” you sigh, turning your head to gaze at him.

“Me too.” He stretches one arm under your head, allowing you to scoot close into his side and rest your cheek against his chest. His heart is a steady beat, thumping slower and slower as his body calms, and you tip your head back to kiss under his jaw. He smiles, allowing his eyes to flutter closed, and skims his thumb over your shoulder.

You lie together in silence for a long time, calming down with soft kisses and touches. You’re the one to break the silence, running a hand over a small scar on his opposite shoulder.

“I don’t know why we never did this before,” you comment.

“Me either.” Sam kisses you tenderly. “It was good.”

You sigh against his lips, gazing up into his eyes as an ache suddenly builds in your throat. “Cas died.”

He nods slowly, exhaling long and slow through his nose. “Yeah. You wanna talk?”

You shrug. “I guess.”

“Tell you what.” Sam props himself on one elbow, leaning down to nuzzle your shoulder. “How about we take a shower, put something on the TV, we can take our time.”

“Uh… yeah,” you sigh, trying to keep your voice steady. “You go ahead.”

Sam gives you a soft, sad smile. “Don’t take too long, ‘kay?”

“I won’t.” You let your head roll back onto a pillow and close your eyes. “I just… I need to cry for a few minutes and I wanna be alone.”

He clicks his tongue and grazes his fingers over your cheek. “All right. I’ll save some hot water for you.”

“Don’t steal it all.”

“I won’t.” He kisses your cheek. “It’s gonna be okay.”

You sigh deeply. “I know. Go on, I’ll be there soon.”

“Okay.” He slides out of bed, and you watch him tread slowly to the door and disappear into the hallway. Rolling onto your side, you bury your face against his pillow, sucking in a deep, shuddering breath and holding it.

Your strokes of luck lately have been too good to be true, and there’s a weight in your stomach that usually only means one thing. All the big, heavy-hitting players are gone. It’s just you, Sam, and Dean now, left alone to form your own little path in the world for the first time ever. It’s terrifying.

Shit’s going to hit the fan, and when it does, this time, it’ll be the worst thing to happen to you.

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seita · 4 years

Text

— little miss perfect | tamaki amajiki (m.)

pairing: tamaki amajiki/f!reader

genre: angst, fluff, smut

wordcount: 𝟼,𝟷𝟻𝟷

tags: forbidden love!au, high society!au, rich!au, arranged marriage!au

note: i posted this a little bit ago but tumblr took it out of the tags so i had to delete it ): i hope it doesn't do it again...

— the life you lived was one of rules; who you hung out with, what you ate, how you sat at the dinner table. nothing was under your control. but when you find yourself falling in love with a man you shouldn't, you find yourself desperate to break the rules.

masterlist | rules

You sighed, letting your eyes wander around the ballroom packed with pretentious people wearing expensive gowns and suits. The chatter was too loud to hear even your own thoughts and you scowled, feeling a headache coming on.

Out of the corner of your eye, you saw the familiar looming figure of Enji Todoroki making his way in your direction. Before he could reach you, however, you slipped between the numerous people to make your way to the bar that was set up on the opposite end of the room.

Glancing over your shoulder, you let out a sigh of relief when you realized the man wasn’t following you.

The bastard had been trying since you turned 18 to arrange a marriage between you and his youngest son Shoto Todoroki ― even though the two of you were vehemently against it. But the man didn’t know how to take no for an answer and proceeded to harass you every chance he got, which was typically at functions such as the one you were currently attending.

You had long since lost sight of your parents, not that you cared. Typically they would keep you by their side to show you off and introduce you to potential suitors in hopes of making connections through marriage.

The very idea made you scoff.

As you took the drink offered from the bartender, you gave him a soft thanks before turning around. Spinning on your heel, you let out a sharp gasp when you bumped face-first into a firm chest. The jolt caused your drink to slosh over the rim and onto your hand.

You cursed, stepping back as you looked up at the wide-eyed man before you. He wore a rapidly reddening blush that burnt all the way up to his cute elf ears.

“I-I’m so sorry!” he cried, reaching into his pocket to fish out a handkerchief, taking your glass from your hand to quickly wipe the mess on your skin away, “I didn’t realize I was standing so close, I’m sorry.”

“I-It’s okay…” you whispered, your tongue feeling heavy in your mouth at the sight of him.

He was tall with indigo hair that stuck up messily on the back of his head. Typically such a thing would be frowned upon ― people in high society desire to look their best, after all. Despite that, he wore a perfectly tailored tux and an expensive gold watch on his wrist. As he gazed down at his task of cleaning your hand, you noticed how long his eyelashes were as they brushed against his cheeks with every blink.

“There...I think I got it all,” he breathed, tucking the handkerchief away into his pocket without a care that it was wet with wine. At least it was white wine and not red, you mused, “You should probably wash your hands or it’ll dry your skin out or something.”

You raised a brow, not sure if such a thing could really happen. Still, you smiled and thanked him, breezing past him to find a bathroom. You still smelled like alcohol now so you needed to wash it off anyway.

When you returned to the ballroom, there was no sign of the attractive indigo hair colored man anywhere. Part of you was disappointed but you brushed it off as something silly. No point in pining after a man you spoke 10 words with after all.

You brushed off that chance meeting, not even paying it a second thought. In fact, you were certain you were either never going to meet him again or that you wouldn’t remember him even if you did.

It was wishful thinking on your end, however, because at yet another pointless high-society function, you caught sight of the messy haired man once more.

“Hey,” you greeted, making him turn away from the conversation he was having with a pretty periwinkle haired girl and tall, blonde man.

“Oh, it’s you,” he smiled, gaze softening from the guarded look he held when you’d greeted him.

From that look alone, you knew he was from a prominent family similar to yours. The type of family where you had to hold your tongue and be on guard for any shit that might come your way. It was an unpleasant, stressful existence.

“It’s me,” you smiled, nursing your glass with two hands, unsure of where to go from there, “I um...wondered what your name might be?”

He looked surprised for a second before smiling an ever-so-gentle smile, “Call me Tamaki.”

“I’m ______,” you introduced, reaching forward to shake his hand.

His grip was firm and practiced but his hand was a bit calloused from what you didn’t know. It still felt nice. His hand was bigger than yours, strong with long longers.

“These are my friends Nejire Hado and Mirio Togata,” he introduced, motioning to them.

You smiled in greeting, recognizing only the Hado name. Her family owned one of the biggest shipping companies in Japan. You wondered what Mirio and Tamaki did.

“Can I ask what your last name is?” Nejire asked.

Just as you were about to open your mouth to answer, you heard your name being called. You felt your blood freeze in your veins. You cringed, your distaste clearly written on your face to the three people standing in front of you.

“Mr. Todoroki,” you beamed fakely as you turned around, “How nice to see you!”

“My Shoto is looking for you,” he grumbled, arms crossed over his chest as he glared down at you.

“I doubt that,” you breathed.

“What was that?” he asked, brows furrowed.

“I said that’s great, I’ll go find him!” you bowed briefly before brushing past him to disappear into the crowd. Looking over your shoulder, you rolled your eyes when you were finally out of sight.

What a pain in the ass that man was.

You hummed as you swung your shopping bags by your side, enjoying the setting sun beaming on your skin. It was a rare day you got to have completely for yourself with no escorts or stupid functions to be seen. In celebration, you went out shopping with your parent’s credit card ― not that they’d ever even notice.

“Excuse me!” a soft voice called from behind.

On reflex, you paused and turned around, eyes wide as you caught the familiar form of Tamaki jogging towards you. He seemed surprised as he stopped in front of you, realizing who you were.

“You…” you mumbled, “You’re not stalking me or something right?”

Immediately his eyes burst red, shaking his head wildly, “N-No of course not! Why would you think that? It’s just coincidence I swear―”

“I’m kidding!” you laughed, patting his shoulder to calm him down, “What’s up?”

“You dropped this back there,” he sighed, scratching the back of his head almost nervously as he held up your folded handkerchief.

“Oh! Thank you!” you beamed, taking it from his hands.

There was a beat of silence, both of you standing there awkwardly unsure of what to say or what to do.

“Hey, you wanna get dinner or something?” you asked suddenly, obviously startling him.

“Wh-What?”

You shrugged, “You don’t have to. I figure since we’re both here, it’s almost dinner time...why not?”

He was quiet for a second, thinking it over before smiling with a soft nod, “Sure. Lead the way.”

“Oh, a gentleman,” you teased, enjoying the way his ears turned red in response.

He was a cute thing, wasn’t he? Shy and soft spoken yet still holding a strong disposition due to no doubt being raised in high society.

By the time the two of you were seated in the fancy restaurant, the sun had dipped beneath the horizon. The sky was cast a deep orange that was rapidly vanishing by the minute. The bright chandelier in the center of the room cast a relaxing light over the both of you. You moved automatically to fold the napkin over your lap with your hands folded over it. Tamaki moved the same way, flashing you a sheepish smile once the two of you were left in silence.

What you planned to be a nice, pleasant dinner ended up in a way you hadn’t expected.

In his bed.

His hand felt like heaven wrapped around your throat, giving just the smallest bit of pressure that made your head rush. He stared down at you with heated eyes, lip tucked between his teeth as he listened to the way you whimpered beneath him. You squeezed around his cock so tight he swore every time you came you almost took him with you.

Sweet Tamaki turned out to be one of the best lays of your life.

Little did you know, it was that little tumble in the sheets that would send your entire way of life ablaze.

You had no idea how it happened; what went from a casual one-night stand grew into weekly outings together to have lunch or dinner, sometimes breakfast if you could manage it eventually morphing into what you could only describe as love.

Whenever you laid your eyes on the messy-haired man, your heart raced and you felt a smile that you had no hope of fighting grow across your face. He seemed to be in the same boat, always having a deep need to touch you ― holding your hand in his, pressing a kiss to your forehead, or simply holding you in his lap.

The night you brought him to one of the famous, high-society functions as your date was the biggest mistake of your life.

“Are you nervous?” he asked teasingly, squeezing your hand in his larger one.

You beamed up at him, shaking your head, “No, of course not!” In fact, it was the opposite ― you were more than a little excited to finally reveal your relationship. Truthfully, you hadn’t thought about the possibility of it being something that could end badly. Your parents hadn’t known you were seeing anyone, it’s not like you were close enough to them to actually reveal much personal information about yourself.

Usually whenever you did, it turned into a lecture that ended with you crying into your pillow feeling like shit with their harsh words echoing in your mind.

However, that night, you found yourself torn from Tamaki’s grasp. Your parents held the most hateful scowls you’d ever seen them wear as they regarded Tamaki’s parents who glared in the exact same manner.

“What do you think you’re doing?!” your mother hissed, yanking on your arm to pull you away from your boyfriend.

“Wh-What?!” you cried, struggling to get out of her iron grip, “Let go!”

“Don’t make a scene,” she hissed, tugging you harsher.

“We’ll talk when we get home,” you father hummed, voice colder than usual.

You glanced over your shoulder to see Tamaki being dragged in the opposite direction with a similar look of despair on his face as he watched you vanish from sight ― the both of you locked in a state of confusion.

Once home, the air around both of your parents was terrifying. Instinctively, you sat on the couch in the lounge with your head down as the two of them paced back and forth, collecting their thoughts.

“How dare you make a fool of us like that, _____?!” your mother cried, making you flinch.

“I-I’m sorry but I don’t understand,” you muttered, keeping your voice meek to keep from angering them further.

Your father scoffed, “Do you even know who that boy was?!”

“Tamaki Amajiki…” you replied quickly.

“Are you dating him or something?” your mother grilled, hands on his hips as she halted her pacing in front of you.

You nodded, not seeing a point in lying, “W-We’ve been together for about 6 months now…”

Your father scoffed, “You are never to see that boy again, do you understand me?”

“But why?” you asked, finally looking up.

Your parents looked bewildered, “You know we have nothing to do with that damn Amajiki family, ______. You are never to speak to their kind again.”

With that, they both stormed out of the room, leaving you more confused than before. You didn’t know that you were supposed to have nothing to do with them. It wasn’t like your parents told you anything, your older brother was the one in line to take over the family business so you rarely ever even got word of the goings on behind the scenes.

Your heart was aching as you went to bed that night, not sure what it was you were meant to do. You had texted Tamaki, seen he read your text but he never responded. It only made you hurt that much more and before you knew it, tears were dampening your pillow.

You had just about cried yourself to sleep when the sound of your balcony doors clicking open startled you upright.

“It’s just me,” Tamaki whispered, closing the doors as quietly as possible, drawing the curtains so no one could see in.

“Tamaki!” you whimpered, bolting out of bed to wrap your arms around his middle. He immediately wrapped his own around you and pressed a kiss to the top of your head, “They said I can’t see you anymore!”

His eyes softened, cupping your tear-stained cheeks to press a kiss against your forehead, “I know. Mine said the same to me.”

“I don’t understand why!” you whimpered, fresh tears falling down your cheeks.

He shook his head, “Our familiar apparently had...some old rivalry that turned sour.”

You scoffed, “That’s stupid. It doesn’t affect us, why should we suffer for it?”

He sighed, leading you towards the bed, “I agree. All we can do is fight it, right?”

“You mean…?” you looked hopefully at him with wide eyes and he smiled.

“I wouldn’t let something like this take you from me, _____,” he promised, moving to lay beside you, pulling the blankets over your forms, “I’ll be gone before the sun rises but for now...sleep, okay?”

You nodded, burying yourself in his chest, taking in the sweet scent you grew to adore. With his heart hammering rhythmically in your ear, you fell into a peaceful sleep you were sure you weren’t going to get that night.

Tamaki’s effect on you was just that; a sense of security. You weren’t sure if you’d ever be able to live without it now.

Things were a bit different with you and Tamaki once you discovered you weren’t supposed to be together. It was more difficult to get away in secret, your parents for once paying actual attention to what you did. Tamaki’s were doing the same.

You found yourself sneaking out of your window in the dead of night more than you ever thought you would. It was worth it, to see the sly grin on Tamaki’s face when you texted him to warn him you were outside.

The two of you made it work, though. Six months blossomed into ten; the two of you edging on a whole year together.

One night, however, as he crawled onto your balcony, you could tell something was off.

“What’s the matter?” you asked as he sat stiffly on your bed, your hand held tightly in his trembling ones.

“______,” he sighed, head hanging low.

Your heart ached in your chest through your anxiety. You waited for him to talk, watching the way he opened his mouth several times only to close it when he changed his mind.

“This is…” he sighed, shaking his head, “This can’t work anymore.”

Those words shattered your heart in your chest and you pulled your hand from his grasp. He didn’t fight to get it back, avoiding looking at what he knew were your tear-filled eyes.

“Wh-What happened?” you whispered, voice trembling.

He shook his head again, “All this sneaking around...what’s it going to get us?” he stood up, his back to you, “Whether we’re together for a year or 5 years...are we going to sneak around forever? We can’t do that.”

“You’re...you’re breaking up with me?” you asked pitifully.

He hesitated for a moment before nodding, “Eventually I need to be with someone I can be with. Our parents won’t let us do that...so there isn’t a point anymore. I’m sorry, _____…”

He moved to make his way to your balcony doors again when you bolted out of bed, wrapping your arms around his middle to keep him in place. He halted, letting you sob into his back, his heart breaking at the sound.

“Please don’t do this, Tama!” you cried, fisting his shirt, “I don’t want to lose you. You’re the only good thing I have ever gotten in my life. You know what this life is like! Everything about it is controlled and revolving around a stupid image but...with you I don’t have to worry about anything. I’ve never felt more free with anyone than I feel with you...Tamaki...please…”

Your brokenhearted confession spurred him into turning around, cupping your cheeks to pull you into a loving kiss. It made your head swim, your eyes fluttering shut as you deepened the kiss, losing yourself in the feeling of his arms around you.

He held you so desperately, like you would slip away from him any second. Part of you knew that that was exactly what would happen. Once the sun rose, that would be it ― he wouldn’t get to hold you in his arms ever again.

You pushed that thought out of your head, instead choosing to slide his shirt up until he had to break away from the kiss to tug it off.

He picked you up by the waist, spinning to deposit you on the bed. He crawled on top of you, burying his face in your neck to press soft kisses there. You angled your head back to give him all the room he needed.

He wanted so badly to mark you up, to leave you with something of his, but he couldn’t. Squeezing your eyes tight, you fought back tears as you clung to him, nails digging into his shoulders.

He reached down, pushing the hem of your silk nightgown over your hips. Sucking in a breath, he felt his cock harden rapidly at the sight of your pretty panties.

“You’re so pretty,” he breathed, meeting your lips for another kiss.

You cupped the back of his head, pulling him even closer, arching your hips up to grind against him. He let out of stuttering breath, gripping your hip to urge you to grind rougher.

“Please, Tama,” you begged, breathing ragged at the teasing pleasure you were receiving.

“What do you need?” he breathed, a tone you knew only you got to hear.

To everyone else, he was a timid and shy young man who had trouble maintaining eye contact for too long. But with you, being closed doors, while you shared sweet kisses and heated touches, you got a side of Tamaki no one else would get to experience.

“I need you, please,” you begged, reaching forward to pull at his belt.

It was obvious he had come straight to your place after being somewhere — perhaps dinner with his parents.

He nodded, leaning back to clumsily strip himself of his pants. He stumbled a bit, making him mutter out embarrassed apologies with bright red cheeks. Soon enough, he was on you again.

With experienced fingers, he helped strip you from your own clothes. Your nightgown came off to reveal your bare breasts, a sight Tamaki couldn't help but whimper at.

Leaning down, he enveloped one of your perked nipples in his mouth. You tugged at his head, letting out soft sighs as he switched to the other one. Wet with his saliva, the cooler air caused them to harden even more.

Feeling impatient, you began to push your panties down your hips. Tamaki, sensing your urgency, helped pull them free of your ankles, tossing them to be lost somewhere in the darkened room.

He cupped your cheek, bringing you in for yet another kiss. His lips were so soft, his kiss pouring every ounce of love he felt for you. His free hand found its way between your legs, parting your folds to graze over your clit.

You gasped into his mouth, arching your hips at his teasing touch. He smiled against your lips, circling the bud until your thighs trembled before easily sliding two digits into your clenching hole. He paused, letting you adjust to the minute stretch before angling his fingertips up to hit your sweet spot. He had long since memorized your body ― every erogenous zone, every sweet spot, it was all committed to memory.

Your body was a temple just for him and he treated it with so much care.

You were sure you would never have anyone like Tamaki Amajiki again. The thought made your heart ache and you squeezed your eyes shut to keep from crying.

He pulled his fingers free, holding them up to his face to see the way they glistened with your slick. Popping them in his mouth, he whimpered at your taste, wishing he could get on his knees and eat you out for this last time.

But the way you reached between his legs to bring the tip of his cock to your entrance let him know how desperate you were for him. Not wanting to keep you waiting, he easily slipped in with your assistance.

He sunk in to the base, let out a sharp groan as your walls squeezed him. Neither of you were willing to wait long ― he set a quick pace that brought you both great pleasure. Sweat coated your bodies and caused you to stick together. Neither of you really care, however.

You reached down to grab his hand, bringing it up to your breast. He smiled, thumbing your nipple before descending down to envelop its twin between his lips.

His tongue swirled around the bud, relishing in the way it made your walls squeeze him.

“F-Feels so good!” you whined, clawing at his back, no doubt leaving behind red scratches.

“Yeah?” he breathed, making sure to angle his hips just right to hit that spot he had memorized.

Your reaction was instantaneous, a sharp cry so loud he had to reach up to cover your mouth with his hand.

“Can’t be too loud,” he warned, his cock throbbing at the teary, pleasure-filled gaze you fixed him with.

He could feel your moans vibrating beneath his hand as he continued his sweet pace. Your walls squeezed him tight and he groaned, dipping down to press his face to your neck.

“Gonna cum,” your words were muffled but he managed to catch them.

He nodded, sitting back on his heels. His grip on your mouth moved to your throat, the long digits wrapping around your neck just the way you liked. In an instant, his pace doubled and his other hand found purchase on your pelvic bone, thumb extending out to rub at your swollen clit.

The hard bud throbbed beneath his touch as he circled it in time to his thrusts. His hand tightened against your throat, feeling your moans vibrate against his palm as you reached your high.

Your back arched and your eyes rolled back before fluttering closed. The pinch in your brow and the way your mouth hung silently open sent him over the edge, your own euphoria being enough to make him cum.

You squeezed his cock tight, milking everything he had to fill you up.

Everything came to a slow halt, Tamaki slowed his grinding before allowing his softened length to slip free. His cum dripped from your still spasming entrance, making a mess of your bedsheets. Neither of you cared, however, as he laid beside you.

“I love you,” you whispered against his chest, eyes fluttering with sleep.

“...I love you too,” he replied, kissing the top of your head.

As you drifted to sleep, you missed the flood of tears that dripped down his still flushed cheeks.

The next morning, the birds chirping from your open balcony door woke you up. Immediately, images of last night came to mind. You sat up, holding your sheets to your chest as you looked around.

Your nightgown and panties Tamaki had stripped you of were folded atop your dresser and there was no sign of your boyfriend.

Or rather...ex-boyfriend.

The thought made your heart clench and you couldn’t stop the stinging in your eyes.

It was really over.

Your parents miracuously, and unfortunately, noticed the rapid change in your demeanor. They grilled you on the cause, although they already knew it was related to your feelings for Tamaki. Over the course of the month since he disappeared from your bed without another word, you’d grown more withdrawn and lonely. The everyday, boring rule-filled life you lived losing the tiny glimmer of happiness Tamaki once provided.

“Is this about Tamaki’s engagement?” your mother asked one evening, making everything around you come to a screeching halt. Your eyes fell to her at the other end of the table. She wasn’t looking at you, shaking her head as she cut the steak on her plate, “It’s silly to be upset over something like that. I would have expected you to be over him by now.”

“I love him…” you confessed tearfully.

Your father scoffed, “don’t be ridiculous. Love is pointless, you know that.”

“But I…” you were cut off by your mother’s sharp glare.

“You think your father and I love each other?” you fell silent at those words, “You’d be wise to let go of that stupid fantasy of marrying for love right now.”

“We’ll take care of that soon, don’t you worry,” your father threatened with a glare that let you know the conversation was over.

The man certainly lived up to his threat because the following week, you found yourself sitting at a table with Enji and Rei Todoroki. Shoto Todoroki sat stiffly to your right, fisting his dress pants with a cold look on his face.

“I’m glad you’ve finally seen reason,” Enji spoke in that ugly, superior tone that made your face morph to one of disgust. Glancing at Shoto, you saw his eyes narrowed at his father.

At least he seemed to hate him as well.

“Well, our daughter seems to need it,” your mother spoke in a sickly sweet tone, “She’s got this foolish idea of love in her silly head. So we decided your offer for marrying young Shoto couldn’t have happened at a better time!”

Enji nodded with his arms crossed over his puffed out chest, “Excellent. You won’t regret your decision. I’ll have the proper paperwork filed as soon as this weekend and we can begin the proper preperations.”

You heard Shoto sigh beside you as he stood up, placing a hand on your shoulder. You looked up to find a sorrowful look in his eyes that almost made you cry, “I’m sorry…”

With that soft sentiment whispered soft enough that no one could hear him, he held his hand out to you. You sighed and took it, allowing him to help you to your feet.

“_____ and I will take a walk,” Shoto announced, “I’d like to get to know her a bit more.”

“Excellent idea, dear,” Rei praised, though you couldn’t help but think the smile on her face was more than fake.

Shoto squeezed your hand, leading you out of the room. Once the two of you were safely away from the prying eyes of staff, hidden away in the garden, he released your hold.

“You fell in love with someone you weren’t supposed to, huh?” he mused, making you look up at him in shock. He chuckled softly, “Don’t worry, whatever you tell me is safe with me.”

“Yeah…” you whispered, frowning at the cobblestone ground, “I didn’t know I wasn’t supposed to be with him until we were already together. My parents keep telling me it’s stupid to be in love…”

“I understand,” he sighed, starting a slow pace walking around with his hands clasped behind his back. When you looked up at him, he was gazing at the moon, the light making the glassiness of his eyes even more visible than you would have thought, “I did the same thing.”

“Really?” you couldn’t help but ask.

He nodded, chin wobbling slightly before he spoke, “Her name was Momo. We were together for almost 3 years before she was married off to some guy before I even knew it was happening. She told me that it was never going to work between us anyway so we shouldn’t have even bothered,” he sighed, “I was pretty heartbroken.”

“It seems you still are,” you mused softly.

He chuckled, looking over at you finally with a sad smile, “That’s the life we live, isn’t it? Sad and lonely...nothing is truly ours, not even our love.”

Those words resonated in your heart, making you bite your lip to fight back tears. He stopped, taking your hand in his similar to how Tamaki had that last night you were together.

“Regardless of whether we are married or not,” he breathed, “I will never expect you to love me but...I will make sure you at least enjoy my company. I won’t let us become like our parents. We can at least have that bit of happiness to ourselves, right?”

“Shoto…” you breathed, the tears you had been fighting back finally coming forth.

He cupped the back of your head, bringing you in for a sweet hug, “Who knows...maybe if we’re lucky we’ll be able to love each other in the end…”

Those words faded into the night, neither of you sure if such a thing would ever be possible. Both of your hearts already belonged to other people. It was a painful existence but you could have wound up arranged to be wed to a worse man.

Shoto wasn’t bad, you knew that. He managed to make you feel happy when you were together ― which became more frequent the closer your wedding date grew. Of course, he didn’t make you anywhere near as happy as Tamaki did.

You desperately missed the closeness you felt with him. How it felt to be wrapped up in the strong arms of a man who loved you. Almost every night, you found yourself sleeping on a wet pillow.

The night before your wedding, you found yourself sitting in your bedroom with a dual haired man standing in the middle of it. It felt so strange; he was going to be your husband in just 12 hours but you still had another man on your mind.

You remembered how it felt to have Tamaki sneaking into your room late at night too.

“What’re you doing here?” you asked softly.

“You’ve been crying,” he pointed out, making you wince.

“I’m sorry…” you apologized, unsure what for.

“Why are you saying sorry?” he chuckled softly, walking closer to you.

“I’m crying because I’m marrying you tomorrow, that can’t feel very good,” you sighed.

He shook his head, hands tucked in his pockets, “I get it. That’s why I came here.”

“What do you mean?” you asked, wiping a stray tear away.

“_____,” he sighed, “Is it really worth it? What do you get out of doing what they say? You’re an adult...there’s nothing they can do to stop you from leaving. You have a good education and I’m sure Tamaki does as well,” his words had you pausing, “You might not wind up with as much money as you have now but at least you’ll have the freedom to be a person. I lost my chance by letting my parents control my life and take Momo away from me. But you still have a chance.”

“Are you saying…?”

He smiled, placing his hand on top of your head, “Be with Tamaki. Even if it’s just for a few months or a few years, you’ll know what it’s like to live your own life. I can’t even imagine what they could feel like. Aren’t you tired of living like this? With all these rules...they tell us who we can be friends with, what to eat, how to sit at the damn dinner table...we’re barely even people. We’re just a means of obtaining power. Our parents marry us to the most powerful families they can in hopes of getting an heir worth a damn. It’s bullshit.”

“Shoto…” you whispered, a new sense of life flowing through you, “What if he’s not willing to leave it all?”

He shrugged, “Then at least you can say you tried and...in the morning if it didn’t work then you can marry me and we’ll adopt a damn dog or something.”

“I’m allergic to dogs,” you countered.

“A fucking cat then,” the uncharacteristic curse had you giggling into your hand.

“Thank you, Shoto,” he took a step back as you stood up, “I’ll see you around.”

“We’ll see,” he replied, watching as you wrapped a measly bathrobe around yourself, not a care in the world about getting properly dressed.

You were out of breath by the time you made it to Tamaki’s. Your car was parked down the street to avoid attracting any attention. Tamaki’s bedroom light was on and you eagerly climbed the lattice that decorated the side of the house.

Peeking into his room, you could see that he was sitting at his desk, writing something. He tensed when he heard his balcony door open, spinning in his chair to gape at you.

“_____?” he gasped, jumping to his feet to shut the door and close the curtain. He gripped your arms, hissing when he felt your temperature, “It’s freezing out what the hell are you doing wearing that?”

You beamed at his care for you, throwing your arms around his shoulders. Immediately, his hands found purchase on your hips to hold you against him.

“Run away with me, Tama,” you breathed.

He froze, pulling away from you with wide eyes, “Wh-What?”

“Run away with me,” you repeated, fisting his shirt, “What’s really keeping us here? We can make it on our own, we have good educations and can get good jobs. We can be together and be happy without outside voices whispering in our ears. We can be normal people, Tamaki.”

He was quiet, loosening his grip on you to take a few steps back. He ran his hand through his hair with a sigh. The happiness and confidence you had built up quickly crashed and you found yourself feeling foolish.

Why would he want to leave everything behind for you? He was in the same position as you; due to be married soon. Hanging your head, you let out a sigh.

“It’s alright,” you whispered, shrugging your shoulders, “I get it’s something really big to ask. You don’t have to take me up on it. I just thought...I would see.”

He still didn’t say anything and you turned on your heel to make way for the balcony, “I’m um...getting married tomorrow so...I just thought you should know that I love you so much, Tama. Being with you was the best thing I ever had...even when I’m married with Shoto, I’ll never stop thinking of you, okay? I wish you the best in your own marriage.”

You got out to the balcony, swinging one leg over the rail to climb down when two strong arms pulled you back. You gasped when you fell to the ground, your weight pressed against Tamaki as he buried his face in your neck. It didn’t take you long to realize he was crying. His tears wet your shoulder as he squeezed you tight.

“Don’t go,” he cried, “The idea of you being with another man...it’s too much.”

“Tama…” you whispered, holding onto him in return.

“Let’s do it,” he sniffled, pulling back to gaze into your eyes. He leaned forwards and pressed his lips to yours, “I’ll pack a bag. Have you got a bag?”

“No,” you replied sheepishly, “I wasn’t sure if you would say yes so I didn’t want to assume.”

He chuckled, untangling himself from you before moving back into his room, tossing all sorts of clothes and valuables into his suitcase. You laughed as he talked about selling stuff for money.

Before long, he was packed and ready to go.

Once you were sitting inside your car, the heat blasting as you warmed your cold skin, he reached over and took your hand in his. You looked at him, finding that familiar look of love in his eyes that never failed to make your heart soar.

As he squeezed your hand, you just knew that everything was going to be just fine.

#bnha x reader #bnha smut #tamaki amajiki x reader #amajiki smut #bnha imagines #mha x reader #mha smut

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jtargaryen18 · 4 years

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All Heaven in a Rage (The End)

Chapter 33

Story Rating: Explicit, 18+ only Warnings: Non-con, Kidnapping, Stalking, Explicit Sexual Content, Dubious Consent. References to torture. Please read responsibly. Relationships: Steve Rogers/Reader

On AO3 SnowQueen79/JTargaryen18

A request for a dear friend. This takes place after the Infinity War but before Avengers 4. Steve Rogers has lost most of those he had left to the snap and loneliness is battle he’s losing. What starts out as an honest intention to help a girl who has caught his eye in daily life becomes a dangerous obsession where the lines of what’s real and what’s fantasy are blurred.

The moodboard is by the awesome @gumikon

I do not consent to have my work hosted on any third party app or site. If you are seeing this fanfiction anywhere but archiveofourown or tumblr, it has been reposted without my permission.

~~~

The days that followed were… interesting.

It started when you were released from the medical unit at the compound. Steve was bringing the SUV around as Dr. Helen Cho went over care instructions with you. You were to come back for a follow up at the compound in two weeks. If Helen wasn’t there for some reason, you’d be talking to Dr. Woods.

Dr. Woods.

Why did you know that name? You were even picturing someone in your mind with Steve standing right behind him…

Speaking of Steve, you were sitting on the edge of the bed when he strolled up.

“Are you ready?” His smile was dazzling.

You nodded. The dull throbbing at the back of your head smarted as you walked and he noticed. It only got worse when Steve scooped you up and placed you in the back seat of the SUV. You couldn’t help but feel like you’d done this before.

Steve climbed into the driver’s seat, looking over his shoulder at you for a moment. “Are you okay, Sweetheart?” he asked.

You nodded. “I’m fine. Just tired I guess.”

Nodding, he put the SUV into gear and drove you away from the compound. The entire time your mind was scrambling. What was happening to you?

Steve pulled up in front of your apartment building. “Are you okay heading up?”

“Yes.” Then you stopped to study him. “You’re not coming up?”

Steve grinned. “I’m going to find a place to park and then I’ll be right there.”

You felt relief because after what you’d been through over the last couple of days, you didn’t want to be alone. Claire and Bette had really hit it off and Claire’s boyfriend was also a consideration. You didn’t know if she was up there or not.

Climbing out, you headed up to your apartment. The sight of countless boxes of your things greeted you. You almost felt tired looking at them. It was clearly marked which were yours and which were Claire’s. Still…

“Hey,” Claire heard you come in and smiled. “How are you feeling?”

“I’m better,” you admitted. “Just gotta get back into the swing of things.”

“I know, right?” Claire smiled, grabbing another box of her things and carrying them into her room.

“How are you?” you called, peeling off your jacket and hanging it up on its peg.

“Good,” she told you. “I’m going out with Michael later.”

Leaning in the doorframe of her room, you smiled. “Things are going well there, huh?”

Color flooded her face and she smiled. “They really are. He’s very good for me. I enjoy spending time with him.”

“I’m happy for you.” You meant it.

“How are things with you and Steve?” Her smile was genuine. “He apologized to me you know. For the last few days. Like that was his fault.”

You weren’t surprised.

“He’s wonderful,” you told her. “He did feel terrible that the three of us went through all that.”

“Michael thought it was the coolest thing. Honestly, I was surprised that you wanted to move back in here with me,” Claire went on. “I kind of expected you to move in with him. Can’t say I wouldn’t.”

You laughed with her.

“I wouldn’t do that to you.” You wanted her to understand that. “It was bad enough that Brian pulled the stunt he did when we got this place. It was supposed to be the three of us. I wouldn’t leave you high and dry on the rent.”

There was something Claire wasn’t telling you. You could tell.

“What?” you prompted her.

Steve walked in at that moment, grinning at you as he came up behind you and wrapped his arms around your waist.

“Well, Michael’s actually… I know it’s too soon but…” Claire finally blew out an exhale and said, “he’s trying to talk me into getting a place with him.”

Steve squeezed you just slightly. While Claire’s explanation left you panicking a little – you couldn’t afford the apartment by yourself. You just knew that Steve would have a solution for you and exactly what it would be.

“I’m happy for you,” he said over your shoulder. “Do I get to meet him at some point?”

Steve had both Claire and Bette completely wrapped around his finger at this point.

“Yes, maybe later actually,” she told him sincerely. “I wouldn’t just cut out on you though. Even if it means I’ll stay until the end of May.”

You nodded. Shit, she was serious. And Bette was moving in with Nat.

After talking for a few more moments, Steve steered you back towards the kitchen, eyeballing all the boxes there.

“Where do you want to start?” he asked with a smile.

The three of you spent the day reorganizing and cleaning the apartment until Claire was ready to go out on her date. Michael must have been given a head’s up Steve was there by Claire because he came up to the door and was introduced to Steve. He was dressed nice, had flowers in his hand. You tried not to laugh.

Michael, who was indeed very handsome and well-mannered, did his best to try to and get the Captain America seal of approval. Steve didn’t say anything but if he’d found something really wrong with Claire’s boyfriend, you would have known.

Once they’d left, you grabbed menus from the drawer next to the over and sighed. Hungry now and ready to get takeout.

Steve was working on fixing a broken door hinge on one of your kitchen cabinets. That same déjà vu hit you. Steve working on something with tools in a different time, different place. You thought it was a door before…

“What do you think of Michael?” you asked him after a moment.

Steve nodded. “So far he seems like an alright guy.”

Though he hadn’t said as much, you knew Steve wasn’t happy that you were moving back into your apartment. Steve wanted to find another place and you knew it was because of what happened before. And he wanted you to live with him.

“We’ll get married before too long,” his voice echoed in your memory. “And I’d like to have a couple of children.”

Were you remembering things from that other time? It occurred to you that you were seeing things in your mind, but they weren’t your memories.

Maybe they were.

Putting down the screwdriver, Steve rose from the floor and pulled the menus out of your hand. He tipped your chin up with a finger.

“Are you okay?” Steve’s gaze locked with yours, his expression one of concern.

You nodded slowly, not sure you wanted to share with him what was going on in your head. But you also didn’t want him to worry about you.

“I guess the concussion has me feeling a little off,” you explained. “I’m sorry.”

Cupping your face carefully in both hands, he pressed a gentle kiss to your lips.

“Hey, no,” he said meaningfully. “You need time to recover. We’ve been at this for hours. Let’s stop for the day and get some dinner. How about that? Maybe you can turn in early.”

Wrapping your arms around his waist, you pressed yourself against him. “Are you staying the night?”

Steve’s hold tightened on you and he sighed above you. “I really wish I could, Sweetheart. We’ve got a mission tomorrow. Leaving first thing in the morning.”

Why did that send you into a mild panic?

“Where are you going?” You asked as you pulled back to gaze up at him.

“Eastern Africa.” Steve ran a finger along the side of your face. “It’s close enough to Wakanda that we can set up base there, get their help and shelter. Hopefully, it will be a quick mission.”

You nodded and you knew that he’d be sent away to save the world because that was what he did. You just didn’t expect it to bother you when that day arrived.

But yeah… it did.

“How long will you be gone?” You hated the slight whine in your voice.

Steve, on the other hand, couldn’t have looked happier. Why? He had to realize that you were crazy about him, didn’t he?

“A couple of weeks,” he told you, dropping a kiss on your forehead.

“Will I hear from you?”

“Not a lot,” he explained. “Contact is complicated when we’re out in the field.”

And you wouldn’t want to distract him and put him in danger. You nodded your understanding.

“You know that I’ll check in any time I can,” he assured you. “If you need to get a message to me, I’ll tell you who to contact and they can reach me. Okay?”

Pulling him against you again, you began running your hands up and down his back.

“How much?” you asked your thoughts on giving him a good send off.

Steve blew out an exhale, placing his hands on your shoulders and pushing you back slightly. The pained expression on his face spoke volumes.

“Sweetheart, you just got out of medical,” he said gently. “As much as I’d love to spend the night with you, I don’t think it’s a good idea right now. Let’s save it for when I get back. It will be something to look forward to. I know I will.”

Frustrated, you pouted a little.

Steve chuckled.

“Don’t be like that,” he told you. “I’ll make it worth it when I get back.”

You frowned up at him. “Make sure you come back.”

“I have every reason to now,” Steve assured you.

You had Chinese food delivered and as you had not long ago, you loaded up plates and ate in the living room, watching a couple of episodes of Band of Brothers. After a little while, you both put your plates on the coffee table and at the end of the second episode, he pulled you into his arms and kissed you senseless. That turned into a make-out session that ended when he finally pushed you slightly back, his excitement obvious at the front of his jeans.

“If I don’t stop now, I won’t stop,” he told you with a smile, rising from the couch and helping you up. “I’m going to head out and get ready for tomorrow.”

Pulling out a card, he pressed it into your hand.

On the front embossed was Nicholas J. Fury. Wow.

“If you need to get a message to me, this is the only way you’ll be able to do it,” Steve told you meaningfully. “Okay?”

You nodded.

“Please take care of yourself,” he went on. “I know you’ll be visiting Bette and Natasha and you can spend as much time with them as you like.”

You smiled. Natasha was his friend and ally and she was off missions until well after the baby was born.

“Okay,” you told him.

“If you want to help me with finding a place in Brooklyn, please feel free,” Steve said, leaning closer.

That reminded you that Bucky had just gotten finished with his evaluation.

“How is Bucky?” you had to ask.

Steve appreciated that you recognized Bucky’s place in his life.

“He’s going to be okay,” Steve told you. “In fact…”

Taking back the card he’d given you for Nick Fury, Steve pulled a pen from the cup next to your fridge and wrote Bucky’s number on the back.

“If you need anything while I’m gone,” Steve explained, “call him. He’s out of missions for a little while. But while he’s home…”

You nodded, liking that better. Nicky Fury intimidated you. Bucky? You thought you could comfortably approach him.

After another mini-make-out session, Steve made himself leave and you eventually found your way to bed. But you had a headache, cramps, and strange dreams that kept you up much of the night.

***

The next morning one good thing happened. You had a text from Steve before he left.

SR: I love you. I can’t wait to get back to you.

You couldn’t help but smile at that and wish he were there, in your bed. You had no idea how much you were going to miss him.

Michael had come back with Claire and stayed overnight. You awoke to the sounds of him and Claire laughing as you got a shower and got ready for your day. And on top of all that, you felt sick. Your tummy felt unsettled, your head ached, and you were heading back to work and school today.

And as you headed back to your room from the bathroom, only in your towel, you passed Michael.

Great.

Claire caught you before you left, a little embarrassed at the fact that Michael was there.

“Is this okay?” she asked you.

You nodded and told her you’d see her later, not really having a response for that. You couldn’t say anything given how many times you’d had Brian over.

Brian. You didn’t even know where he went. As much as you’d thought you’d loved him, Steve occupied your mind now. And he was out somewhere on the other side of the world, putting himself in danger to save other people.

You were an hour into your job at the coffee shop when the first clear memory hit. You’d been standing there talking to Spencer about his course load for the next semester and in your mind, clear as day, you could see Spencer in Steve’s house. Having dinner?

That never happened. Spencer hadn’t been to Steve’s house.

Wait.

When things were slow and Spencer took a break, you dug the letter out of your purse and scrambled to read through it to see if anything had been said about Spencer coming to dinner at Steve’s house. It didn’t take long to find the reference.

Steve did end up letting you invite Spencer over for dinner last night. It was nice. Of course, Spencer had tracked you down to Steve’s house – that’s how good a friend Spencer is – and had the police do a welfare check on you. No kidding. I played along, told them I was fine and grateful to be there with my boyfriend.

You shook your head. Were you going to remember everything from that time now? How hard had you hit your head?

“You okay?”

Natasha, Steve had you calling her Nat now, leaning on the counter in front of you, her beautiful smile warm.

Blowing out an exhale, you tucked the letter back into your purse. She saw you do it, so you weren’t in a rush to move. That would only hurt your head and make your stomach worse.

“I think so,” you told him. “How are you?”

“Thought I’d pick up a coffee and see if you wanted some company on the way over to campus,” she said.

Well, it was almost the end of your shift.

With coffee for each of you, you were struggling today, you were actually happy for the company.

“So, what’s going on today?” she asked when you were quiet. “First day back?”

You nodded politely.

When she cast those sympathetic eyes at you again, it all just came out. The more you knew about the beautiful spy, the more you realized she probably knew everything you were going to say anyway.

Nat smirked as you mentioned the first day back at your jobs, at school, in your apartment and with Michael staying over no less. Your head hurt from the concussion and you’d been feeling sick at your stomach…

You missed Steve.

“You’ve already said that,” she pointed out, her grin widening.

“How’s Bette and the baby?” You hadn’t had a chance to talk to her since everything with Rumlow had happened.

Nat’s smile was brighter than the sun. “Did Bette tell you…”

“That you’re adopting the baby?” You couldn’t help but smile. “She did. I’m so happy for you.”

“Thank you.” She flashed suspiciously shiny eyes at you. “I don’t think either Steve or myself would have ever expected you to do what you did. You knew everything from the letter and you still introduced Bette to me. You still… I’ll never be able to repay you. Either of you. You don’t know how much this means to me.”

“I think I might,” you told her.

A flash of Nat walking into a room where you were reading a book on the couch in a white nightgown…

You didn’t immediately realize that you’d stopped walking. Nat drew you out of your head with a hand on your shoulder.

“What is it?” she asked carefully.

Tears pricked the backs of your eyes. “Ever since I hit my head when… I’m… I’m remembering things… At least I think I’m remembering things… from that other time. It’s so strange. None of them are moments I’ve ever experienced but they’re in my head like…”

Her red brows knitted. “How long has this been going on?”

“Since the day of the attack,” you told her the truth. “I haven’t told anyone else… Some of the things I’m remembering…”

Nat’s eyes were clouded with concern.

“You shouldn’t be alone through this,” she told you.

“I’m not. I’ve got Claire… and Michael.”

“Who I’m guessing know little able post-traumatic stress,” Nat went on. “Why don’t you come stay with Bette and me for a few days. I have experience with this. I can help you.”

You started to tell her you’d be okay out of hand, but you knew she wouldn’t take no for an answer.

“I’ll pick you up at your place around seven, okay?” Natasha smiled. “Bette will be happy to see you and it will be for the best. You’ll see.”

Afraid that she might be right, and about what you might end up remembering, you agreed to the time.

***

A week passed and while you’d had no word from Steve, Nat assured you everything was fine. You checked in with Claire each day and apparently while you were staying with Nat, Michael was staying with her. Thinking about Claire moving in with Michael was stressing you out too.

You didn’t know what you would have done without Nat and Bette. You were remembering everything from the other timeline, you were pretty sure. You remembered waking in the hospital from the mugging, the bath incident, Spencer coming to dinner at Steve’s house…

One night you’d dreamed about the break-in and Nat woke you gently, quieted your screams. Her presence had been comforting because in the dream, she’d been there with Steve to rescue you. Once you calmed down, she confirmed everything that had come back to you. She’d translated it into a happier thought, explaining how you and Steve had stayed with her for a few days and told you that three of you had gone on a fun shopping day.

“The three of us?” you asked her.

When pain clouded her expression, you regretted the question. But then an image of a happy little face formed in your mind.

“Kara,” you whispered. “Oh God, Nat… What happened to her?”

A tear slid down her cheek. “She went home when her family came back. I watched them carry her out of the hospital that day… I didn’t see how I was going to be able to go on.”

You weren’t the only one who had suffered. Nat had lost the baby girl she’d raised for months and unlike you, remembered all of it. The pain had to be incredible. And here she was taking care of you.

You held onto each other for a long moment. You heard nothing but the shoulder of your sleep shirt was wet from her tears. When she pulled back from you, she smiled.

“I did a terrible thing,” Nat whispered. “I can tell myself all I want that Kara’s family was gone and there was no one left to care for her. I can try and convince myself that if we’d never reversed the Snap, she would have had a better life with me than in the system. Maybe that’s true… But she was still never mine to take.”

Swiping at her tears, Nat went on. “My actions encouraged Steve’s. I knew that. When he told me about you and your circumstances after the Snap, I encouraged him. When you escaped, I took you back to him. I hope one day you can forgive me... Do you remember that at all?”

You shook your head. You just knew about it from the letter.

“You will,” she promised me. “I just hope you’ll still be my friend when that day comes.”

Your heart was breaking for her. “Nat –"

“I remember trying to convince you that he deserved someone good for all that he’s done. And I still believe that. He deserves so much… But, honestly, neither he nor I deserve you.”

“But—”

“After all of that, you introduced me to Bette and now, I’ll hopefully have a daughter again,” her voice was choked with tears. “I’ll get a second chance that I… don’t deserve. I’ll be able to keep her.”

Nat didn’t realize that her remorse for the wrong she’d done, the true regret of her actions, made her worthy.

“I have to ask you something,” Nat went on. “The worst parts of the letter… The worst things you told yourself Steve had done. Do you remember those?”

You nodded. You thought you had. You remembered the bath incident. You remembered the first night he’d had sex with you… You remembered the time he’d really been rough with you, leaving marks.

“Do you still… care for Steve? Even after knowing everything? Even after seeing it in your mind’s eye?” Her eyes were intense on you and you knew she’d catch any lie you told. So you didn’t…

“I love him,” you said simply. “Maybe I shouldn’t but… I do.”

Nat nodded knowingly, running her hand through your hair. “You’re perfect for him but he knew that when he chose you. You make him so happy… He shouldn’t have taken you as he did. He shouldn’t have followed my lead. But a part of what he did was just… Steve. When he gets an idea in his head, you’re not going to make him change his mind. There’s never going to be a time when he doesn’t push for what he wants. Especially with you.”

You had to smile at that. That was the truth.

“That doesn’t mean you have to be the sacrificial lamb here,” Nat’s tone grew in strength and determination. “You love him. You want to be with him?”

Again, you didn’t see the point in lying. You slowly nodded.

“Then make it on your terms and don’t leave everything to his control,” Nat was serious. “He wants you to live with him. You know that.”

“I do.”

“He wants to marry you, have a family with you. He told me that,” she went on.

You weren’t surprised.

“But that doesn’t mean he gets to control what happens and when, does it?” Nat pointed out. “As long as he knows he’ll get these things at some point – and that’s if you want them too – he’ll let you set the pace. He might even let you have your way sometimes.”

“Sometimes,” you said with a chuckle. This was Steve you were talking about. “I think I would like to live with him. My roommate is probably moving in with her boyfriend. Don’t know what I’ll tell my parents. They’ll probably like him… I may want to get married and have kids at some point. I’m not ready for that yet.”

“But it’s not a hard no?”

You shook your head. Married? Yeah, you could see yourself marrying Steve one day. Children? Maybe.

“Make him yours,” Nat told you. “Take control of the situation. Steve will be gone on missions for weeks at a time, like he is now. From a certain point of view, it’s an advantage for you.”

The simplicity of the notion floored you. It made you stop and think about how Steve had been with you, in this timeline. You’d initiated your first kiss in the kitchen of your apartment. The first time you’d had sex, he’d let you lead the entire thing. He’d been hesitant to even touch you. He’d only gotten dominant with you when you’d explicitly asked for it.

He’d helped you move back in with Claire, hadn’t he?

Maybe Nat had a point. Maybe he would let you set the pace. Maybe he’d feel guilty about how things went before.

Maybe just because he loved you.

Nat knew the moment you took her words to heart. Her smile was beautiful.

“I could really use your help then,” you began. “Steve said he wants to look for another place in Brooklyn. He said if I wanted to help with that while he was away but… I have absolutely no idea what I’m doing.”

The evil glint in Nat’s eye made you laugh. “Oh, you’ve come to the right place. I’d be more than happy to help with that. And see? Normally, we don’t have much time for things like house hunting with our lives. I’ve only got it now because of the baby.”

Nat’s mind was going a mile a minute. “If I know Steve, he’s hoping you’ll find a house that you like as an incentive to share it with him. He’s not going to care where he lives as long as you’re there.”

“So you’ll help me house hunt?” You were hopeful.

“We’ll start tomorrow,” she told you with a grin.

You talked a few minutes more and then she left you to sleep. To your surprise, you slept better than you had in some time.

***

Steve had been gone for two weeks now and you were still staying with Nat and Bette. You’d been for your follow-up doctor’s appointment. Dr. Woods had taken care of you and he looked exactly as you’d imagined. You had known him before.

While you were busy with school and work, Nat was setting up appointments with realtors for really nice properties around Brooklyn. And you were grateful. She knew Steve’s tastes in houses better than you did and most every house she’d arranged for you to see was more modest than lavish but had more room than you thought you’d need. Each house you could see Steve living in.

Most of them you could see you living in too.

Nat often had a lot of questions for you and at first, you told her it mattered more what Steve thought. But who were you kidding?

You loved Steve. Would you end up living with him?

You hoped so.

Today you were struggling. You missed Steve. You just felt off. You’d had no focus in school. Spencer had pulled most of the work at the coffee shop. The rest of the day hadn’t gotten better.

When you walked into the nice Brownstone Nat had booked a tour of today, the heavy scent of artificial lilac hit you hard, made you feel nauseous. When you ran back outside, covering your mouth and breathing heavily, she dashed right out after you.

“You okay?”

You nodded, your forehead breaking out in a sweat.

“You’re sure?”

“Yes,” you managed. “I’ll be okay. That lilac was just… strong.”

Nat regarded you curiously but waited with you. When you had a grip on your stomach again, she followed you back into the house to continue the tour.

The realtor was a woman with bright red hair and a pleasant face. She smiled sweetly at you when you returned.

“How far along are you?” she asked with a wink.

You knew your mouth had dropped open but damned if you could do anything about it.

“What?”

Nat’s expression held a note of curiosity. She thought you were pregnant too?

You shook your head and tried to smile.

“No, I’m not,” you told her, not sure who you were trying to convince. You were most definitely not pregnant. How could you be? “Let’s see the house.”

The woman cocked an eyebrow at you but continued as if she’d never asked the question.

The house was roomy and there were things you liked about it, but it wasn’t your favorite. Afterward, Nat helped you into her car and dashed around to the driver’s side.

“You’re still hung up the one down from my place, aren’t you?” she asked as she buckled in.

You grinned at her. “It’s roomy, it’s unique, and it would be in walking distance of yours. What’s not to like?”

“Was she right?” Nat asked, taking you off guard.

“About?”

“Are you expecting?”

You couldn’t look her way. Just stared straight ahead, watching the neighborhood bustle all around you.

When you didn’t say anything, Nat did. “Talk to me. Are you okay? Because you’re white as a sheet right now.”

You had nothing to say and when you finally reached her house, Nat turned off the car.

“Do you –”

“I don’t know,” you admitted, feeling your face heat up. “I just happened to think about my last contraception shot and I think it’s way overdue. They tell you those can take months to wear off though. So I should be okay. I wouldn’t think I would be…”

“But you don’t know.”

You shook your head.

Nat’s right hand reached over to cover yours. It was warm and calm.

“Can I ask you something?”

You were pretty sure you had an idea of what it was. You nodded.

“What if you are?” she asked. “What are you going to do?”

Tears began to sting the backs of your eyes even as you laughed. “Well… I’m going to have to rethink my schedule. If what Bette said was true, I’m probably not going to feel like working two jobs and going to school.”

The hope in Nat’s eyes when her gaze swung to you had you smiling. “You’d keep it?”

“Yes,” you said without thinking about it. “Not really looking forward to explaining that to my parents if I am but…”

Nat chuckled. “Has Steve even met them?”

“No. Not yet.”

“He’d marry you tomorrow,” she went on. “You know that, right?”

You nodded.

“I won’t say anything.” Her fingers squeezed yours.

“I know.”

“You want to run back out and get a couple of tests?” she offered.

It was a lot to ask but you nodded. You’d almost felt guilty for relying so heavily on her.

You both went in and caught up with Bette. When Bette went to her room to do homework, Nat told you to let her know if you needed anything including a shoulder to cry on.

And cry you did. The first test had you dissolving into a puddle of tears. The second test confirmed your result.

You were not pregnant.

You felt more than a little foolish sitting on the closed lid of the toilet, a negative pregnancy test in each hand, bawling like a baby. You couldn’t even put your finger on why exactly you were upset. Had you wanted to be pregnant?

***

Another week went by and your anxiety only grew. Was Steve okay? Bucky and Natasha both assured you that you’d know if something was wrong. As you sat in Natasha’s living room that Tuesday night, she studied you in that way that only a world-class spy could.

“Are you okay?” she asked finally.

You nodded but she wasn’t fooled.

“What is it?” Her smile was kind. “You know he’s okay.”

“I trust you on that.”

“Was it the test?” she asked.

“I’m not…” You hadn’t told Nat or anyone they’d been negative.

“Wait.” Bette wasn’t dumb as she bustled back from the bathroom. “Did you have a scare?”

“It wasn’t a scare so much…” You knew Steve would have probably been happy if you had been pregnant. Might have proposed marriage. You still had to introduce him to your family. Mom, Dad, this is Steve Rogers. Yeah, Captain America! We’re having a baby, too. "I got my contraceptive shot updated."

“Look at that mind work,” Natasha still studied you. “What about the house that’s down the block? The realtor let me know someone else made an offer on it.”

Natasha was reading you while Bette managed to look concerned.

“You want that house,” Natasha said slowly.

Oh, you did. Nat was certain Steve would really like it. It was close to Natasha which you both would like. Well, Steve would like, you corrected.

You weren’t going to be living there.

“It’s not for me,” you told her. “I can’t do anything about it if someone else wants to buy it.”

When she cocked a brow at you, your heart skipped a beat. Were you wrong?

Bette’s phone hummed and she blew out a frustrated exhale – she’d just managed to sit down – and struggled to her feet to go to another room and take the call.

Natasha stared at your harder.

“You remember that timeline now.” It wasn’t a question.

You nodded.

“Has it changed anything for you? How you feel about him?”

“No,” you admitted. “Not really.”

“Have you thought about what I said?” she asked meaningfully. “About taking some ownership in this relationship. You can love him on your own terms, share that house. A happy life together.”

It was a pretty picture.

“Do you want that house?” she asked you again.

“Yes, I do,” you admitted.

“And Steve?”

“Yes,” you said emphatically.

“What do you think you should do about it?” Nat asked you carefully.

“What can I do?”

“Let’s review your options,” Nat began.

***

Steve texted you three days later, and your heart flew as you read his simple message.

SR: I’ll be home tonight, Sweetheart. I’m sorry the mission took so long. We’re all okay. I can’t wait to see you. I’ve been looking forward to it.

You’d been shelving books in the young adult section. You blew out a careful breath before you answered. You remembered what Nat told you to ask.

You: When will you be arriving at the compound?

It took a few minutes before you got an answer for that.

SR: It will probably be around 9 when I leave there. Do you want me to come to the apartment? Or would you be comfortable coming to mine? Do you have work tomorrow?

No, you didn’t have work tomorrow. You had the entire weekend off. You’d had a time arranging that, but you hoped it would be worth it.

You: I’ll have you brought to me. It’s a surprise.

Again, there was a pause. Five minutes later he wrote back.

SR: Okay, still looking forward to it.

You couldn’t keep the smile off your face.

You: I can’t wait to see you.

Nat picked you up after your shift at the library ended, drove you to the house that was temporarily Tony Stark’s property. Helping you with all the bags, Nat grinned at you.

“You have everything?” she wanted to know.

You nodded, hugging her tightly. “Thank you for everything.”

The spy was all too happy to help you execute the plan she’d helped you come up with. “Good luck,” she told you before driving off.

You had just enough time to get dinner going and to get dressed up. The four of you, Bette and Claire included, had gone shopping one evening and Nat had helped you select the right outfit. You’d remembered Steve liked you in red and had a thing for stockings. From there you’d found a great dress, slinky heels, the right lingerie.

You were going to give this your best shot.

The table in the dining room was set. The bedroom was ready.

It was a twenty-minute ride from the compound to the house and damned if the car didn’t show up at 9:20 PM exactly.

You watched from the window as Steve climbed out of the car with his bag, taking a long look at the house that was lit up from soft lights in the yard. He looked tired which made you pause even though Nat would have you believe that he wouldn’t be too tired for what you wanted.

You dashed to the door when he began climbing the front stairs. You opened the door slowly, smiling at him.

Maybe Nat knew exactly what she was talking about. The moment he saw you, the wariness dissolved, and his gaze swept you up and down. Slowly, he smiled and walked in through the door.

“Are we alone?” he asked, his gaze heated.

You nodded. “It’s just you and me.”

Faster than you could think, he’d dropped the bag, slammed the door shut and had you pressed hard against it.

It wasn’t how you planned things, but you really couldn’t care about that when his lips were scorching yours and his greedy hands were all over you, his powerful body holding you in place. When his mouth blazed a path to your ear, he had you gasping as his lips teased that sensitive shell.

“Do you have any idea,” his voice was a low purr in your ear, “how many times I’ve imagined this? Coming home to have you waiting for me like you are right now? You look beautiful…”

Pulling back, he pressed his forehead to yours. His breath was coming fast.

“Well, it’s not home,” you said slowly, trying to catch your breath. “But it could be. You said you wanted another place… in Brooklyn.”

Steve’s gaze didn’t move away from you. “I’ll look at it later. Right now? I just want you.”

You leaned up to kiss him as his hands grabbed your thighs, hauling you up to straddle his waist. When his fingers slid under your dress and found the edge of your stockings, he growled, nipping at your lower lip with his teeth.

“Sweetheart, you can tell me how to get to a bedroom,” he leaned in to steal another kiss, “or I can take you right here… Your choice.”

You wrapped your arms around his neck and hung on after pointing the way. The bedroom was lit up by soft candlelight and the king-size bed was done up in clean, soft bedding.

And you’d expected to be tossed onto it, but he surprised you when he gently put you down at the foot of the bed. Taking your hands, he spun you around until he had his back to the bed and took a seat on the edge of it. You stood in front of him, not sure what you should do.

“You look so beautiful,” he whispered. “Strip for me… I love that dress, but right now I want to see what’s under there.”

The way he looked at you gave you confidence. You could do that. But you needed a little help. While the skirt flared out, the bodice was form-fitting and you weren’t sure you could easily reach the zipper at the top of your back and make that look sexy.

Turning your back to him, you swept your curled hair over one shoulder. “A little help, Captain?”

His fingers slowly pulled the zipper down to where it ended at the bottom of your spine. Glancing over your shoulder at him, you turned around and let the dress slide down to your hips before you made a show of pushing it down to the floor.

When you straightened, he got an eye full of the red satin bra and panties you wore. And they were skimpy. There’d been garters but you’d gone with thigh-high stockings with lace tops instead. Steve took his time looking you over, licking his lips.

You were about to ask him if he wanted you to take the rest of it off when he got his hands on you, slinging you onto the bed on your back in one quick, calculated movement. Steve was on you then, his leather jacket hitting the floor with a thud just before his shoes hit. His mouth was teasing the sensitive spot just beneath your ear while his strong hands worked their way under you, unfastening your bra. It went flying a second before his mouth and hands were on your breasts.

Steve was greedy and impatient with you. Your nipples were diamond-hard and aching when his fingers began yanking your panties down. They caught on the strappy heels you wore and that had Steve pulling them away, his large fingers working at the small leather straps of the shoes so he could remove them but he left the stockings on you.

He looked hesitant but he roughly pulled off the t-shirt he wore, working on his jeans next.

It was the injuries to his torso that stopped you cold. He’d just worked his jeans off when he noticed your reaction.

It was awful. His arms and chest were covered in bruises, scratches. One long cut extended from his right pectoral down to the bottom of his ribs on his left and you winced, pulling yourself up to get a closer look.

“Sweetheart,” he said gently, “It’s okay. It’s just like last time… It’ll be gone by morning.”

You were on your knees in front of him, taking a close look at his injuries and knowing that they had to hurt.

“Steve,” you couldn’t keep your alarm out of your voice as your fingers traced the one, long cut across his body. “What happened?”

“Doesn’t matter,” he whispered.

Lowering his head, he chained kisses down the column of your throat, across to your shoulder in a way that made you shiver even as you were trying to look him over. He wasn’t having any of it. One rough hand slid down to your hip, slid further until you felt his fingers slide between your thighs, into your slick folds.

“I can’t wait, Sweetheart,” he whispered against the tender flesh where your neck and shoulder met. “I just… can’t…”

The room spun as Steve flipped you onto your stomach, your face landing in the pillows. Rough fingers grabbed your hips, pulling them up. You cried out when his mouth dove into you from behind, your fingers clutching the pillows as he devoured you with lips and tongue. He teased your clit with wicked lashes of his tongue, over and over again. He used his tongue as he would his cock, teasing it in and out of you until your inner walls were clutching in need. You came on his tongue, gasping for air the first time. He made you scream the second time. When you were growing sensitive and he wouldn’t slow down, you tried to wiggle away from his grip. A firm hand pressed down on your back, keeping you from going anywhere.

When you thought you’d pass out, he stopped and you felt his weight drop over you. You loved the way his heavy thighs pushed yours open. When you felt the large, smooth head of him running along your pussy lips you thought you’d lose your mind.

“Please,” you begged him. “I need you… so bad.”

“Not as bad… as I need you,” he whispered by your ear as he began pushing into you.

Your body stretched to accommodate him, and the burn was everything you wanted, pleasure and pain blended into an ecstasy that left you clawing at the sheets, struggling to breathe. Sliding a hand under you, his fingers quickly found your clit and began to tease that bundle of nerves in a maddening gentle way. You felt more of him drape over you, holding you in place as he bottomed out, filling you in a way you weren’t sure you’d ever get used to.

With your aroused lower body trapped between his teasing fingers and the heavy drag of his cock as he began to move within you, you weren’t sure you’d keep your sanity. His hand swept your hair away from your left ear and you shivered when he ran his tongue up your neck to your ear.

His hot breath filled your ear, making you shudder.

“I thought about you every night,” he whispered, his lips teasing your ear lobe. “I couldn’t wait to get back to you… inside you…”

His torturous mouth stretched your sanity even farther. He knew your shoulders and neck were your weaknesses and he didn’t hesitate to use them against you. His lips and tongue teased that sensitive flesh until another orgasm swept you away for a few seconds, had you tightening around him as he drove in and out of you in a firm, intoxicating rhythm.

“Yes, baby,” his voice was low in your ear, “come for me… Squeeze me…”

You didn’t have a choice. But your release had him fighting off his own. He hung on long enough to work you up again. Your thighs shook as he plunged in and out of you in a heated cadence. His grip on you tightened, his thrusts came harder. Steve shouted out into the room as his own release claimed him, shaking him as he worked himself through it.

Your body still hummed when you felt him roll off you to lay at your side. His eyes were closed, his breath a harsh rasping sound. You slid your own hand beneath yourself, your fingers where his just were. You were on the edge. It wouldn’t take much to finish you off.

The man’s senses really were that enhanced. Within seconds, his eyes opened, and his gaze found yours.

“No, you don’t,” he whispered, pulling himself up on the bed and rolling you onto your back before you could blink. “Not on your fingers. Mine…”

Steve batted your hands away, sliding two long fingers into your aching channel and easily finding that special spot he knew would tear you apart. When he began to brush his fingertips against you, it took your breath. When he lowered his mouth to your clit, within seconds you came screaming. And he dragged it out until you were left a trembling mess on the bed.

The world faded from you, but you knew you were safe. You felt soft covers being pulled over you. You were pulled back against his warm, muscled body.

Slowly the world came back to you. You felt Steve’s warm breath against your shoulder and neck, making you shiver. He hummed just under your ear.

“I could get used to this,” he whispered, one hand smoothing over your hip.

“Could you?” You smiled in the soft light of the room. “There’s dinner too.”

You didn’t know how much time had passed and hoped it was all okay.

Steve sat up behind you, stretching. “Dinner sounds great. If I don’t get up now, I’m not going to.”

You understood that. You fished your panties from the floor and put them on. Grabbing the robe you’d brought for yourself, you pulled it on too. You went to take the stockings off and his hand stopped you.

“Not yet,” he whispered.

Steve dressed behind you before following you to the kitchen. He smiled while you served everything. Nothing was harmed amazingly.

“That smells wonderful.” He placed his hands on your shoulders. “You made this?”

“The recipe is Bucky’s,” you explained. “It’s Chicken Cacciatore.”

That it had anything to do with Bucky only made him happier. He helped you get everything to the table and the two of you enjoyed the meal. After a few moments, you noticed him glancing around at the house.

“So you like this house?” Steve asked you with a smile. “It’s not far from Nat’s at all. It’d be easy to walk there.”

“I know.” You grinned. “And yes, I really do. Nat and I both thought it might… suit your needs.”

“Yeah, I kind of thought Nat was involved in this somehow,” he said though he didn’t seem to mind at all. “Did they let you just try it out for the night or…?”

“The weekend,” you explained. “I have the weekend off. The house? It temporarily belongs to Tony… unless you want it.”

“It’s a nice house,” Steve told you. “But I’m looking for a home. And it’s not a home without you in it… Claire wants to move in with Michael.”

You knew he’d latched on when Claire told him that.

“Live here… with me,” Steve said gently. “Say you will, and I’ll buy it from Tony. I’ll take you to work and school. If I’m not here, I can arrange for someone to get you there.”

You were trembling under that gentle gaze. He wasn’t asking for anything you didn’t already want. Your heart was pounding so hard you knew he could hear it.

“What about my parents?” you threw in there. You doubted once they knew who you were living with they were going to mind too much.

Steve grinned. “You know where I stand on people living together. I’m probably more old-fashioned than your parents are. If you want me to put a ring on your finger, Sweetheart, all you have to do is say the word.”

Nat’s words ran through your mind. He’d marry you tomorrow. You know that, right?

Steve was dead serious, his beautiful blue eyes lit up with love and hope.

Instead of focusing on what you were and weren’t ready for, you remembered what Natasha told you. You wanted him to be yours. On your terms.

“I could live here,” you said before you lost your nerve. “I’m not ready for anything else… yet. But… I like this.”

There wasn’t a hint of displeasure in Steve’s expression. If he was disappointed by your tentative offer, it didn’t show.

“I like this too,” he told you, his eyes shining in the candlelight. “So is that a yes?”

There was so much hope in Steve’s face, you might have said yes even if you didn’t mean it.

But you realized that you did.

“That’s a yes to living with you,” you clarified.

Steve’s smile was triumphant. “When?”

You laughed at his enthusiasm. “When do you want me?”

“Right now,” he said gently.

You worked together to put the dishes in the sink, to put away leftovers. Then you let him lead you back into the bedroom, pull you back into the bed. You’d assumed that he’d be ready to sleep after the injuries he’d sustained and being gone on a three-week mission, but he wasn’t done with you quite yet.

This time he made love to you carefully, gently.

You lay sprawled across his body afterward, trying to breathe, but you could tell his mind was still going.

“When do I get to meet your parents?” Steve asked with a smile in his voice.

“Soon,” you told him, ready to drift off to sleep and happy with where things were.

You’d just nodded off when the deep timbre of his voice startled you awake.

“When you said you weren’t ready for anything else yet—”

“Steve,” you cut him off, lifting your head and kissing him softly. “I love you. Night.”

That line meant to mark your exit into your dreams, you snuggled against his chest and got comfortable again. His arms tightened around you and he blew out a soft sigh, his heart a steady, strong beat in your ears.

You’d just nodded off again when he went on.

“How would you feel about a ring?” Steve said quietly. “Doesn’t have to mean anything specifically but…”

Shaking your head and grinning, you gave up and headed off into your dreams. Of course, you knew he was going to follow you there too.

Your villain. Your hero.

Your Steve.

The End

#All Heaven in a Rage #AHIAR #Dark Steve Rogers #Dark!Steve #Captain America #Steve Rogers #Steve Rogers x Reader #Steve Rogers x You #Avengers #MCU

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cultleaderyoongi · 2 years

Text

Opposites Attract – pt.1 | myg

☆ pairing: Yoongi x f. reader, (Namjoon x f. reader)

☆ genre: s2f2l, hints of e2f2l at first if you squint (one-sided sentiment though), love triangle • angst, fluff, eventual smut

☆ word count: 12.7k

☆ warnings: bro-code violations (it's up for debate if reader is fair game); mature language; mentions of alcohol; virgin shaming to some extent; the word wh*re being mentioned

☆ navigation: pt.1 | pt.2

☆ a/n: Hi there! I'm back after an almost 6-month hiatus, and this was supposed to be out for Yoongi's birthday, but I guess this is my gift to you in celebration of my birthday now as well lol though also a week too late to that lmao And since it's gotten kinda long, I spontaneously decided to divide it into two parts which also gives me more time to finish up the last few lines oops As always, I hope you enjoy reading. If you do – thank you! Lmk how you like it, I love feedback ♡

(P.S. special shout-out to whoever can guess which album they're talking about in the record shop scene!)

(also P.S. I'm part of a fun, little Discord server created by the dearest @kooala where we share our favorite fics, simp over our biases, etc. and we'd love for it to grow. If you're looking for a cool place to connect with people and discuss anything K-pop, feel free to join here ♡)

☆ taglist: @bangtansjonas

There aren't a lot of things in the world that catch Yoongi's attention. He's most interested in music, creating his own little world as the beat becomes one with that of his heart. Basketball is another interest of his, the satisfying swish of the rubber globe falling through the hoop like music to his ears.

One thing is for sure though, and that is people aren't at the top of his list – meeting new people, that is. There's only a handful of people he actively cares about in his own aloof kind of way. Human interaction isn't his forté, so he's more than thankful that the people he does hold dear to his heart understand his weird antics. He would have a hard time admitting it, but losing even one of them would tear him apart. Breaking his hand-signed vinyl copy of Kendrick Lamar's DAMN. in half would hurt less, he concludes.

Having his set group of friends also means that the idea of adding another person fills him with frustration. For as long as he can remember, it has always been him, Namjoon, Hoseok, and Seokjin. No one else but him and his three best friends since childhood days. He convinces himself it's already too late to add another person into the mix anyway, almost two decades of friendship making it impossible for anyone to feel remotely comfortable among the four of them. But not everyone shares the same belief from the looks of it.

"I hope that's okay," Namjoon probes, hands buried in the front pockets of his chino pants as he leans against the red-brick façade of the faculty building behind him.

"More than fine by me," Hoseok drawls while running a hand through his chestnut hair. "Maybe you should worry about Grumpy Cat over here." His lips pull into a half-smirk.

At the mention of the all-too-familiar nickname, Yoongi peels his gaze from the concrete steps he's sitting on, turning towards his friends. "Why? Think I'm gonna rip someone's head off with my sharp fangs?"

"The risk is minimal, but never zero," Seokjin states in amusement, the hand curled around his iced coffee lifting into the air in emphasis.

The eldest's comment draws a scoff out of the man in question. Yoongi has grown used to the light punches at his reserved persona and granted, he would feel weird if the teasing stopped at some point. No matter how old the jokes have gotten.

"What am I? The mom in the group that tells you no all the time and grounds you for no good reason?" he grumbles, fixing the snapback covering his platinum-blond tresses.

"No," Hoseok retorts, "you're more like the uncle with the shotgun that everyone's secretly afraid of."

The group exchanges words in agreement leaving Yoongi with nothing but an annoyed glare. As the commotion dies down, he sighs in defeat. "It's fine or whatever. You already invited them anyway."

Namjoon nods, his face lighting up ever so slightly. "Okay, cool. You won't even notice she's there."

"She? You invited a girl?" Yoongi exclaims in confusion, loud enough to catch the attention of other students lingering around.

"Ah, Yoongi... You weren't paying attention again, were you?" Seokjin playfully nudges his friend in the elbow with the tip of his suede shoe. "Namjoon invited this girl to hang out tonight because he has a thing for her but is too afraid to ask her out on a proper date."

"Hey! That's not what it is," Namjoon grumbles, adjusting the black-rimmed glasses sliding down the slope of his nose.

"But you think she's hot?" Hoseok probes with a raised eyebrow.

The youngest barely responds, a breathy chuckle and a hand scratching at the nape of his neck enough of an indicator.

"That answers that."

Yoongi absentmindedly toys with a pebble, creating white marks as he scrapes it across the concrete surface. Who in the world invites a random girl to hang out with a bunch of strange dudes? he thinks to himself, the scratches becoming harsher until there's nothing but wild scribbles.

"Can you stop fussing around already?"

Namjoon mumbles out a quick apology to Hoseok beside him, immediately halting the shaky movement of his leg.

It hasn't even been five minutes since the quartet arrived at the movie theater, awaiting the arrival of the youngest's secret date.

"It's not a date," he fends when Seokjin teases him again, a hand running through his short – notably freshly cut – hair. "She's a friend, and I invited her out because– Oh! She's here." As he practically jumps up from his seat on the black leather couch, Namjoon storms towards the entrance.

"Not a date my ass," Hoseok comments, earning an affirmative chuckle from the eldest.

With the rest of the group rising from their seats, Yoongi reluctantly follows lead, hands immediately finding harbor in the pockets of his jeans.

"Oh, she's pretty," Seokjin muses to which Hoseok hums out in confirmation.

As Yoongi's focus finally shifts from the dark blue carpeted floor to his friend and the stranger standing next to him, he raises a brow. Yeah, she's pretty, he thinks to himself. At first glance. Yoongi isn't one to be easily swayed by looks though, so he mindlessly trails behind the other two.

"Guys," Namjoon turns towards the others, "this is _____. _____, these are my friends."

You beam a friendly smile at Seokjin who is the first one to extend his hand out to you, shaking it lightly before letting you move on to Hoseok.

Yoongi is slightly taken aback when your eyes land on him, nothing but warmth emitting from them. Usually, no one ever even dares any attempts at approaching his cold exterior. When he gives you his name, he swears your grin grows impossibly wider. Who in the world has the energy to be this friendly?

"Alright," Hoseok starts, "why don't you guys"–he nods towards you and Namjoon–"go get some snacks while we buy the tickets?"

The group separates as suggested with you and Namjoon heading towards the snack bar while Yoongi follows Hoseok and Seokjin to the ticket booth. Stealing a glance at his friend, he silently scoffs at the sight. You're deep in conversation, head lolling back in laughter at something Namjoon says. He finds your reaction so over the top. Sure, Namjoon can crack some jokes from time to time, but it almost looks like you're losing it. It's such a weird sight, and your clashing outfits underline that. You stand out in your yellow, ruffled top and cherry-red Vans against the beige and white hues of Namjoon's ensemble, the same shade of red showing up on your nail beds and the tint on your lips. This is definitely a date, he concludes. And now we have to play wingman. Great.

When the group gathers again to exchange tickets and snacks, Yoongi slightly flinches in surprise as someone thrusts a bag of popcorn in his face.

"Another salty popcorn enthusiast, I heard?" You smile up at him, the telltale rustling noise of popped kernels sounding as you lightly shake the bag.

Taking it with hesitant hands, Yoongi manages to muster up a nod, murmuring out a quick Thank you.

"Salty popcorn is barbaric," Hoseok's voice blares, breaking the unknown tension. "All it does is make you thirsty."

"Oh, allow me to prove you wrong," you counter with a wicked grin, eliciting a laugh from the man.

Throughout your discussion on why salty popcorn is superior, Yoongi doesn't realize he's been behind you this entire time until the five of you are looking for your respective seats in your assigned row. Now he has no other choice but to sit in the middle with you to his right. Fantastic.

Once the movie commences, the entire room falls silent lest the occasional rustling and crunching noises surrounding Yoongi. Absentmindedly taking a big gulp from his blueberry slushy, he proceeds to put it into the cup holder compartment of his chair when suddenly his hand comes into contact with another one.

"Oh, I'm so sorry!"

As he retracts his hand in a flash, he turns his head towards the source of the voice, the outlines of your facial features becoming visible via the blue flashes reflecting off of the screen. "Ah, you're fine," he manages out, the hold on his plastic cup tightening.

His focus is back on the opening sequence when someone invades his space once again.

"Do you want some?"

With furrowed brows, Yoongi's vision steers to the side, your hand holding a package of strawberry flavored Pockys coming into sight. "Uh..." Hesitantly, his eyes flicker from your hand to your face, then back to your hand. "Y-yeah, sure." He takes two of the chocolate sticks, mumbling out a stunned Thank you while he munches on them.

It's an unusual scene – not once has Yoongi come across someone this unhinged and outgoing without inhibition towards him as a stranger with what people call a resting bitch face. Usually, people don't even dare an attempt at building some sort of a connection with him. This leaves him wondering about you: are you always like this or is this all an act in order to stay in Namjoon's good books?

The setting sun outside serves enough light to guide the group through town, yet not enough to cause any discomfort after having spent the last two hours in complete darkness. Namjoon with his sensitive eyes in particular is thankful for that.

"Anybody else hungry?" Seokjin inquires, craning his neck as he takes a look at everyone individually.

"How can you be hungry again?" Hoseok blurts. "You had part of my half of the popcorn after annihilating yours – and then an entire pack of...what was it? Skittles? M&Ms?"

"Both," Seokjin announces proudly. "These were to tend to my sweet tooth though. Now it's time to satiate my savory needs."

Hoseok rolls his eyes at the eldest's response. "Can you believe this guy?" He turns to the rest before a sigh passes his lips. "Alright, I could go for something."

As everyone else hums out affirmative answers, the group settles on their go-to diner for classic burgers and fries.

"So, _____," Hoseok starts, a hefty sandwich haphazardly lodged in between his hands, "how come you know this guy over here?" With a tilt of his head, he gestures towards Namjoon.

You hum as you take a bite of your portion of fries. "Oh, we have the same major. We're also tutoring a class together this semester."

"Someone who matches his intellect, I see," Hoseok answers, a hint of a smirk hidden behind the large patty.

You don't get a chance to chime in when Seokjin continues, "Do you have a boyfriend?"

How subtle. It comes like second nature to Yoongi, a roll of his eyes a common reaction in a situation like this. It's when your eyes meet for a second, the corners of your lips curling upwards in an amused manner that he realizes his rather obvious slip-up.

"No," you chuckle with a shake of your head.

"Girlfriend?" the eldest follows up shortly, several expressions going around the table ranging from awkward laughter to annoyed sighs, the latter most notably sounding from Namjoon and Yoongi.

"Also no," you simply reply.

Seokjin shrugs his shoulders. "Can't hurt to ask."

"Why? Are you interested?"

Yoongi can't help but cackle at how the words leave your lips in such a deadpan yet entertained way, and for a second he's worried the others notice his change in demeanor. Your counter has the eldest choking on his drink though as he erupts into his characteristic windshield-wiper laugh, catching everyone's attention as Seokjin furiously wipes the bottom of his chin covered in soda.

"What happened to the standard ice breakers like What do you like to do in your free time or What's your take on mint chocolate ice cream?" you probe further, lips curling around the straw of your drink.

"Mint choco? Not a fan," Hoseok retorts, his face contorting into a disgusted grimace.

"Also hate it," Seokjin chimes in now with Namjoon following suit, the youngest going as far as mimicking puking noises.

As Yoongi makes no move of joining in on the conversation, you carry on, "Am I the odd one out here again? Guys, this could determine the future of our entire friendship if there's ever gonna be one."

The group erupts into laughter at that until Yoongi decides to come to the rescue. "I like it," he mumbles out nonchalantly with his arms crossed in front of him on the table.

"Thank you!" You turn to him, eyes sparkling in surprise at his sudden contribution. "At least someone with taste."

For the rest of the night, Yoongi can't help but steal glances at you and his best friend across the table, studying your interactions. They look cute together, he thinks to himself. As far as I can tell. And from what he can see it's easy for you to engage in conversation with the other guys as well, effortlessly exchanging quips and revealing facts about yourself. Yet, Yoongi can't seem to figure you out. Namjoon invited you out to hang out with his friends. Of course, you're going to be nice to everyone including him. Nothing to worry about, and as far as he's concerned if you happen to fake it he doesn't care. He never cared.

When you catch sight of him inspecting you, your lips curl into a small smile causing him to avert his eyes as fast as humanly possible. Awkward.

After everyone finishes their meal, you step back outside to say your goodbyes, the cold breeze of the night air brushing past.

"You sure you don't want me to walk you home?" Namjoon inquires, his stare set on you.

"Nah, it's fine," you decline, shaking your head as a shiver runs through you. "My friends are around in the area. They said they can pick me up."

He solemnly nods at your words, pulling you into a half-hug before stepping aside.

"It was really nice meeting you, _____. And hopefully, we'll get to see you again soon," Seokjin notes.

You send the eldest a pleasant smile, waving him off before doing the same to the other two.

When your eyes land on Yoongi, the man in question musters up a meek smirk and when you practically outshine him with a bright beam, he catches himself almost cursing. How are you so fucking friendly?

"So," Namjoon turns to the group once your silhouette disappears into the backseat of a black car pulling up at the curb, uncertainty clear in his features, "what do you think?"

"I like her," Hoseok is the first one to answer.

"Yeah, me too," Seokjin joins in.

It's quiet for an instance before everyone's eyes turn to Yoongi in anticipation.

"What?" the man grumbles, hands burying into his front pockets. "You need my blessing or something? She's alright, I guess."

Hoseok huffs, patting the youngest on the shoulder. "That's the most you're gonna get."

The mellow sounds of some lo-fi hip-hop song paint the perfect atmosphere while Yoongi scours around the store. It's like a safe haven for him, a place where he can replenish his power after a straining week of classes and assignments, unbothered and undisturbed. With swift fingers, he browses through the plethora of record sleeves in search for –

"Oh, hey!"

A somewhat familiar but also not-so-familiar voice startles him. Lifting his eyes from the rows of vinyls before him, you come into sight, cheeks risen into globes as you send him a bright smile. "H-hi," he croaks out, slightly confused. For some reason, the record shop is the spot he least expects to run into you. He's not sure why, but you don't strike him as a person to enjoy these things – though he knows little to nothing about you.

"Any good finds?" you inquire, head tilted to the side as you roam through the selection on your side.

"Uh..." he trails, "yeah, actually." Eyeing you for an instance, he ponders whether to elaborate or not. But why would you ask if you weren't interested? "I was looking for"–pulling out the record in question, he holds it up for you to see–"this one."

"Oh my God!" you exclaim as your eyes land on the colorful cover, splotches of pink and orange mingling with blue and purple hues. "It's such a good album. I waited ten years for this, but it's so worth it."

Stunned, Yoongi sends you a look he's sure he's never given anyone before. "You know it?"

"Yeah," you answer nonchalantly, "track number seven and eight are my favorites. Oh, and also–"

Yoongi flinches slightly when you lean forward until he catches onto your action, flipping the record around to let you check the tracklist on the back of the sleeve.

"–track number four. I'm a sucker for movie sound clips." You beam him a bright smile before continuing, "I'm a fan of Act I and II especially, and the features are expertly chosen." Retreating to your initial position, you finish, "Overall, one hour of excellence I can only recommend."

Yoongi regards you as if you just found the solution for world peace. He didn't expect you to be so enthusiastic about music – let alone hip-hop. You don't strike him as a person to enjoy this type of genre, but who is he to judge a book by its cover? "More of a reason to check it out then," he finally replies with a light chuckle after listening to your rambles. When you grant him another smile of yours just to return to your own business, he continues, "What have you got there?" A little small talk shouldn't hurt, right? After all, you're being exceptionally nice to him, so he should reciprocate.

Your eyes dart down to the vinyls lodged in between your folded arm. "Oh, just a random mix. Some rock, some pop, some R&B." Pulling your shoulders up into a shrug, you finish, "All kinds of things."

He nods in understanding. It's such a superficial thought, but he never imagined you to be so enthusiastic and versatile with your music taste. Not that he ever wondered in the first place, but he knows essentially nothing about you. Hearing about your interest in music piques his interest in you in turn though – on a friendly level, of course.

It comes naturally, falling into conversation about your favorite artists and albums, giving each other recommendations, and it's not long before you step out of the store together after paying for your purchases.

"Which way are you going?" you ask with a hand shielding your eyes from the midday sun, the light adorning your face in a yellow glow.

Yoongi hums out in thought. "I gotta stop by Namjoon's and Hoseok's, so this way." With an outstretched thumb, he points to his right.

"Oh, okay," you answer, cracking a small smile. "Is it fine if I walk with you part of the way? I'm supposed to meet up with Namjoon for a project tomorrow, and I need some books from the library."

"Uh..." The male studies your features, your eyes set on him expectantly, lips slightly pursed yet not losing their curved shape. Despite your outgoing and to him somewhat outlandish nature, you seem to make sure not to overstep any boundaries. He grows fond of the thought, letting out a light chuckle at that. "Yeah, sure."

Throughout the entire way to the library, the two of you converse mostly about music. Yoongi is specifically interested in the fact that you own vinyls as well.

"My brother got me into them," you explain, fingers carding through some strands of your hair being swayed by the breeze. "He has this huge collection he's been accumulating since he was like sixteen."

He listens attentively to your words, soaking them up like a sponge. It doesn't dawn on him at first, but there isn't a single moment of silence – and he doesn't hate it. Usually, it takes him a great amount of effort to stay energized during social interaction, to not feel like he's either faking or half-assing it, or even the need to take flight. As soon as you arrive at the library though, he figures the contrary is the case here, a huge power drain suddenly coursing through every crevice of Yoongi's body.

"I guess I'll see you around?" You turn to him, hand curled around the iron door handle of the entrance.

Yoongi nods leisurely, a small smile forming on his face.

You mirror his mimic though tenfold in vivacity, offering him a wave of your hand in addition. "Tell them hi for me."

Lifting his own hand into the air, he answers, "I will."

And with that, you're gone and an indescribable feeling follows Yoongi to his friends he can't seem to shake off.

"Dude, that was whack!" Hoseok's shrill voice blares across the court, harvesting the attention of several onlookers.

"Yeah, okay. I know," Namjoon fends, watching the basketball bounce off the backboard onto the ground. "Everyone and their dog knows. Fuck!"

The group grows silent as they watch the youngest strut over to the bleachers, rummaging in his backpack.

Seokjin scoops up the ball from the gravel, shuffling over to the remaining boys gathered in the middle of the court. "What's up with him?"

Hoseok sends the eldest a simple shrug of his shoulders.

"What's up with you?" Seokjin shouts across the place but receives no response from Namjoon as he plops down on the bench, swallowing his water in big gulps.

"Okay, water break," Hoseok huffs out, trudging over to his friend followed by Yoongi and Seokjin.

As they reach Namjoon, said man simply shoves his water bottle back into his backpack before springing back into a standing position.

"So, are you gonna tell us what your problem is?" Seokjin tries again, locking eyes with the taller man.

Namjoon sighs in defeat, running a hand through his sweaty strands. "I'm a little on edge, I guess."

"You don't say," the eldest retorts, taking a swig of his water bottle. "But what's the reason?"

It's quiet for an instance before Namjoon continues, "I'm not sure how to go about things with _____."

"What do you mean?" Hoseok takes over this time, drying off the droplets of sweat on his forehead with a towel.

"We've been meeting up here and there. Sometimes for school, sometimes to hang out. But..." He stalls, crossing his arms in front of his chest.

"It's not going anywhere?"

The youngest nods, his jaw set and tongue pushed into the inside of his cheek.

Yoongi zones out halfway through the conversation. Over the course of time, get-togethers with you and either Namjoon or the whole group have become a frequent occurrence. Whether that be in between classes to have lunch or hang out later that day for a drink or two – Namjoon has been making an effort of incorporating you into the clique. And from the looks of it, you and the guys are getting along well.

In addition to that, Yoongi ran into you at the record shop again once or twice. He wouldn't necessarily deem it a notable fact as you parted ways to go on with your days every time, but the moments spent in there remain valuable nonetheless as both of you walked out with new discoveries each visit.

"Have you made any moves on her?" Seokjin questions now, leaning back onto the row of benches behind him.

The man in question tilts his head to the side. "Not per se, but I give her signals."

"What kinda signals?"

This entire time Yoongi remains silent, watching the scene unfold in front of him like an outsider. It's somewhat of a familiar sight, a memory of Namjoon trying to confess to his high school crush coming to the forefront of Yoongi's mind. The boys practically had to push the poor guy into her arms before he could chicken out for the umpteenth time. And though the course of their relationship neared its end sooner or later, Namjoon has at least gained the experience instead of giving in to his doubts. What a shitshow that was, Yoongi thinks to himself.

"I compliment her whenever she's wearing something nice or did her hair and make-up differently, and I bring her coffee and snacks." Namjoon's voice pulls Yoongi out of his daydream.

Hoseok musters his friend with furrowed brows. "You're doing the bare minimum, man."

Seokjin agrees with the former, adding, "You could spare all the second-guessing and straight-up tell her."

At that, Namjoon exhales loudly through his nose. "But she's not showing any signs, you know? At first she did, but now not so much."

Yoongi can see the disappointment in his friend's eyes, and if he could help him he would. But the others are only right – Namjoon has to stop playing around and come clean about his feelings. Yoongi knows he would if he were in Namjoon's shoes. Even with the nearly non-existent experience and abysmal enthusiasm for romantic relationships he has.

"We're not sixteen, seventeen anymore," the eldest blurts out. "If you wanna get the girl, you gotta tell her."

"I know, I know. But..." Namjoon trails, his hooded eyes darting towards the distance. "I dunno. It's obvious something's off. Maybe I came on too strong? Just gimme some time to figure it out, and – oh shit! She's coming."

All heads follow Namjoon's line of sight, a familiar figure coming into vision.

"Hey!" You greet them with a wave of your hand and your signature bright smile. "Heard you guys were here, so I thought I'd come with refreshments." As you pull out a cup carrier from behind your back, the boys let out sounds of surprise. You hand out the drinks to each individually. "I hope I did okay. I got the usual for Joonie,–"

The man in question accepts the beverage from you, a wide grin splayed across his face at the gesture – and most likely the nickname as well – as if the conversation from mere minutes ago is already forgotten.

"–watermelon for Hoseok, pink lemonade for Seokjin, and–"

As your hand curls around the last cup, Yoongi blinks up at you with wondrous eyes.

"–I remember you mentioned Iced Americanos once, so here you go."

Yoongi's lips part, closing and opening again before he mutters out a small Thank you. His hands shake slightly as he takes the cold drink from you. He remembers pointing out his go-to order about a week ago when you joined the clique for a quick coffee break after morning class. You wore your hair up in a bun, minimal make-up yet your face looked as bright as ever, and an oversized–

Hold up. Why does he remember all of this and why does it matter? What the fuck? Yoongi mentally slaps himself on the back of the head.

"So, who's winning?" You plop down onto the bench in between Yoongi and Seokjin, the former going rigid when your arm shortly comes into contact with his.

Everyone's eyes go around the group before landing on Namjoon.

"Last time I checked, we were on a losing streak," he sighs, nodding towards himself and Hoseok.

The remaining boys raise their eyebrows in confusion, not expecting the youngest to paint himself in a bad light in front of his crush.

"I'm the problem though," his teammate follows up quickly, defusing the situation. "I pull him down like a rock. Today's just not my day."

Your lips pull into a pout before curling upwards again, giving him an understanding nod.

"But hey," Hoseok continues, snapping his fingers as if he came up with the perfect idea, "how about you two play together? I could use a break, to be honest."

You lean in further at the proposition, your elbows propped up on your knees with a mischievous smile creeping up on your face. "I'll tell you what – you two go 1v1 and I'll play with whoever wins against these two." With outstretched thumbs, you point to Yoongi on your left and Seokjin on your right.

Hoseok's eyes widen ever so slightly and his lips curl into the shape of a circle.

"Please? I just wanna see you play, Joonie," you add with a slight lilt to your voice, gaze lingering on the tall man.

Yoongi almost spits out his drink, splurting a little as he sucks the caffeinated liquid through the straw. That's not showing any signs? My ass.

"Okay then," Namjoon states cooly though a hint of a smile can be spotted on his features. Retrieving the abandoned ball from the floor, he tosses it into Hoseok's hands. "First one to score ten points."

The two exchange looks with each other before jumping into action, jogging back to the court.

"Oh, thank God," Seokjin sighs loudly from beside you, head slumping sideways onto his shoulder. "I needed to catch a breath. My legs are killing me." He stretches out his limbs as a means of demonstrating his fatigue.

"How can you be tired? I did almost all the work, old man," Yoongi suddenly chimes in, a hint of annoyance yet amusement laced in his tone.

"Yah! I'm only three months older than you," the older male retorts, hoisting himself into an upright position. "I'm exhausted because you're hopping around the place like a rabbit on steroids. You always play like your life depends on it." Seokjin lets out several other humorous remarks that have Yoongi chuckling when a muffled vibrating sound interrupts him. Reaching into one of the pockets of his backpack, he pulls out his phone. "I gotta answer that real fast. It's my mom."

"Tell her I said hi," the blonde comments nonchalantly, adjusting the headband holding back his bangs.

Seokjin gives him a confirming nod before standing up with a groan, finger hovering above the screen ready to accept the call.

It's silent for a few seconds once Seokjin disappears down the line when suddenly a low cackle leaves you.

"What?" Yoongi asks, eyes shifting from Namjoon dribbling past Hoseok and landing a lay-up to you.

You shake your head slowly. "Your friendship dynamic is kinda weird but cute."

"Cute?" he blurts out in disbelief, repeating the word in his thoughts like an echo. Cute... Not in a million years would Yoongi have thought anything remotely in regards to him could be described as cute. "Care to elaborate?"

A shrug of your shoulders serves as part of your answer. "I dunno. I just find it interesting how different you are around each other, but all fuse so well." You rest your head in the palm of your hand. "You and Seokjin, for example, are the bickering type yet you treat each other with so much respect."

Yoongi laughs at your analysis. "Yeah, I guess so."

"It's kinda endearing to see," you add with a small smile.

He reciprocates it with an equally shy smirk. Wow. No one has ever made the effort to look beyond his quote-unquote stone-cold persona. People usually write him off as rude and aloof, and most of the time it doesn't bother him – but hearing someone point out the opposite fuels him with pride.

"Hoseok matches your coolness, but he's more of a happy-go-lucky type compared to you which is a good balance."

Yoongi just smiles to himself at this point, listening to your ramblings. Cool. You called him cool.

"And then you and Namjoon–"

He clears his throat, unsure of what to expect next.

"–are more on the same wavelength intellectually. Like you talk about this and that on an equal level, but he looks up to you like an older brother."

The man regards you with utmost attention, rendered speechless. He's unsure what it is about you as he would usually brush it off, pass the words off as bullshit, but looking into your eyes he can see the honesty, the truth behind them. A mix of emotions comes crashing in like a storm, settling in the core of his stomach, nestling there and leaving him nauseous. What is this feeling?

Before Yoongi can make sense of things, you speak up again. "I can't give you a full breakdown of our friendship yet."

His eyes widen as he lets your words sink in. "Our f-friendship?"

"Yeah." You lean back on the bench behind you. "I'd like to think we're friends." When he doesn't answer, you probe further, "Don't you?"

It doesn't go unnoticed, the barely significant change in volume and pitch of your voice, and it has Yoongi in silent panic. "Yeah n-no, of course we're friends," he stammers, his hand shooting up to brush through some damp strands of his hair.

At that, your signature smile returns, serving as a stark opponent to the orange light of the late afternoon sun. "Okay," you simply reply, licking your lips as you drop your gaze to a patch of grass on the ground. Yoongi does the same when your voice grabs his attention again. "How'd you like that Bryson Tiller I recommended, by the way?"

Swallowing down the lump in his throat, he muses, "It was really good. R&B isn't usually on my radar, but I really liked it."

You beam him a grin that grows wider by the second. "For real?"

Yoongi hums out in confirmation, accompanied by a nod of his head. "I can see why he's one of your favorites."

It's apparent you're trying to form words to speak when a loud roar sounds from across the place, followed by Namjoon sprinting towards the two of you. Hoseok trudges behind him defeatedly, seemingly out of breath.

"I did it," Namjoon announces proudly, pectorals on full display through his sweat-soaked shirt.

You spring up from your seat, cheering and clapping for the male before you engulf him in a tight hug.

The sensation in the pit of Yoongi's stomach intensifies, growing into unbearable stages when he watches Namjoon wrap his strong arms around you. This is unfamiliar territory for him, the force of this inidentifiable feeling brewing inside of him, the unexplicable longing for an answer to something he has never experienced before. Is it possible that he's... No, he can't be. This can't be, Yoongi tells himself. No.

Then he realizes that he hasn't spared one single glance at the game – and neither have you.

"Why the fuck would you do that?" Seokjin utters, his torso pressing further into the backrest of the sofa with each passing second, tightly clutching a pillow in comfort. "Don't look back! Run for your fucking life!"

Everyone's attention is on the lead actress of the movie, her struggle to escape the creature chasing her leaving the group on the edge of their seats.

For tonight, the boys decided on drinks and movies at Yoongi's and Seokjin's place, and despite a democratic vote against a horror movie, you managed to convince the opposition – most notably Seokjin and Hoseok – otherwise.

In his peripheral view, Yoongi can spot the latter grabbing onto his hair in tension the longer the chase continues, mouth falling agape when the main character barely dodges falling into the hands of death.

"_____, why would you make us watch this?" Hoseok whimpers, leaning closer to Seokjin beside him, the elder clawing onto the other as they both cower in fear.

With a lifted pointer finger to your lips, you signal him to shut up when suddenly a loud screech sounds from the speakers, causing you and everyone else to flinch.

Yoongi's hands clench around the armrests of his recliner in shock, a low chuckle leaving his lips once the aftereffect of the jumpscare subsides. When he turns his head to the side though, his expression falls just as fast as it came.

Your hands are clutched around Namjoon's biceps, your forehead resting on his shoulder before you look back up, sharing a laugh with the man seemingly embarrassed at the frightening scene.

Throughout the remainder of the movie, Yoongi's mind wanders elsewhere, the horrifying acts happening on screen serving as mere background noise for his thoughts. Why does he feel so hollow witnessing you together with his friend? He shouldn't care about any sort of physical touch between the two of you. He should be cheering for him now that he's becoming closer with his crush instead. So why is Yoongi internally conjuring up an image where he's the one sitting beside you in Namjoon's place? Why does he wish it was him that you're looking at so sweetly with that sparkle in your eyes? Why– No, stop, he mentally slaps himself. Stop it – now.

The ending credits roll when Seokjin springs up from his seat, a slight wobble apparent in his legs. "That was...something. I'm gonna need another beer. Anyone else?"

Hoseok is the first to give an affirmative answer, followed by you and Namjoon which forces Yoongi to opt for one as well.

"Let's watch something more lighthearted next?" Hoseok pleads as he scrolls through the plethora of movies, and once everyone is equipped with another cold beer, you agree on a comedic drama this time.

Yoongi has a gradually harder time trying to ignore the soft whispers and the glances stolen at each other, so he accepts sleep with open arms once he senses his eyelids growing heavy – the last thing he sees being your eyes facing him.

About an hour passes when Yoongi wakes up from the flickering lights of the TV screen as it shows recommendations after being inactive for so long.

Rubbing his eyes, he looks around the room. Everyone is dead asleep with Seokjin having settled for a makeshift bed on the floor, leaving an entire couch spare for Hoseok. Namjoon occupies one half of the other couch, legs resting on the coffee table – and then there's you next to him, hugging a pillow almost as big as your body in your curled-up state. Yoongi can make out the folded fashion of your legs covered under the throw blanket. You can't possibly be comfortable in this position, he concludes, but yet you look so peaceful, so tranquil – so beautiful.

He barely registers your eyelids fluttering open, deep in thought yet no thoughts at all, so he finds himself flinching once your focus sets on him.

Confusion seeps through every crevice of his being when all you do is stare at him, eyelids still heavy from sleep, wispy eyelashes brushing your skin with every blink. Yoongi should feel uncomfortable locking eyes with you so intently, so intensely, but all he feels is a meaning behind it.

Neither of you break eye contact, the tension growing palpable in the silence of this room, only the ticking of the clock on the wall and the light breathing of your sleeping friends to be heard. It's like only you and him matter at this moment, and when your lips curl into a small smile, he reciprocates the same, watching your eyelids fall shut again.

Yoongi wakes up once more to the now black mirror of the TV screen an hour later – and a light fabric draped atop of him. Running his fingers across the knitted pattern, he realizes it's the blanket you were wrapped up in from before. As his head whips around to the spot to his right, you're nowhere to be seen.

She might've gone to the bathroom, he tells himself, running a hand through his tousled hair. As his throat feels somewhat dry, he rises from his seat in the recliner, trudging over to the kitchen to find the lights on.

You're sitting facing the door, so when Yoongi enters, you're quick to greet him, surprise evident in your features. "Oh, hey."

"Hey," he replies, voice still thick from slumber. "You're up?"

"Mhm," you mumble. "Couldn't fall back asleep."

With shaky hands, he pours himself some water before settling down onto the chair adjacent to you. It's quiet for a while – not the same kind of quiet as back in the living room though. This time, the buzzing sound from the ceiling light and the droplets of water from the tap render Yoongi queasy, the scene transpiring just an hour ago playing on a loop in the forefront of his mind. To break some of the tension, he says the first best thing he can think of at the moment. "Thanks, by the way." When you look at him in confusion, he clarifies, "For the blanket."

"Oh." A light chuckle escapes your lips. "Yeah, I figured you might need it." Fiddling with the cup you're cradling in your hands, you continue, "I don't get why you always walk around in short sleeves."

Yoongi lets out a low hum. "It's not like I'm immune to the cold, but I'm less prone to it."

"Really?" you question him with interest. "I feel like I'm freezing all the time. Here, look."

"Ah–" Yoongi winces in surprise when one of your hands curls around his, the surface of your palm frigid against his skin. Like hypnotized, his eyes are fixated on your fingers laying loosely atop of his, the delicate flesh of your digits brushing against his calloused ones, your meticulously manicured nails a shocking juxtaposition to the rough edges of his. He's taking in the soft pink of your nail polish, a similar shade to the tint on your lips and a stark contrast to the prominent purple veins raking across his knuckles like vines.

Despite the clear collision of different worlds, all Yoongi can think about is how this looks right and how this feels right. Your hand might be freezing cold, yet he's fighting the urge to intertwine fingers with you until the temperature of your limb matches his – but then he remembers who you are. "Yeah..." Slowly retracting his hand from yours, Yoongi's vision steers to a cracked tile on the floor, the memory of a clumsy Namjoon in drunken stupor coming to the forefront of his mind. "You're really cold," he murmurs.

As if some sort of spell was lifted, you empty the remnants of your water in one go before slowly rising from your seat. "I should probably get going."

"W-what?" Yoongi stammers with a slight delay, processing your words. "It's like"–he squints at the clock on the wall–"two in the morning."

"Yeah, well..." Placing your used cup in the sink, you turn back around to face him. "I have some things to do tomorrow, so I should probably get some good rest in my own bed instead of breaking my neck sleeping on your couch." You finish your explanation with a hint of a smile.

Yoongi watches you with caution, searching for any sign that might give away your innermost thoughts. He doesn't remember you talking about any plans earlier today. "Let me walk you home then."

"Oh no, it's fine. You don't have to." Vigorously waving your hands in front of you, you politely deny his proposal. Why are you so adamant about it?

"I think I do." He's unsure where his assertiveness is coming from, but the thought of you returning home in the dark all alone renders him with discomfort.

"Really, it's not the first time. I'll be fine."

The male scoffs at that. Even more of a reason now, he thinks to himself. Who in their right mind ever made you walk home by yourself? "I don't think so."

"It's really not that far and I have–"

"_____, I'm not letting you walk home alone at this hour. Over my dead body." Pushing his tongue into his cheek, Yoongi declares, "It's either that or I'm waking up one of the guys to take you instead."

When you look up at him with wide eyes, he's concerned he might have overstepped a boundary – but he's merely being sensible. What if something happened to you? The thought alone sends shivers down his spine. He would never be able to forgive himself.

Your small voice softly rings in his ears, barely noticeable but enough for him to be able to finally breathe again. "Okay."

The walk to your apartment is dead-silent most of the way except for when you mumble out directions. Once you arrive at your apartment complex, you send him a small smile, thanking him before turning on your heel without wasting another breath.

"_____!" Yoongi calls after you.

You halt in your steps, facing him again.

"Did I do something wrong?" He knows he didn't, but something must have happened that caused your change in attitude. There's no way you can be angry with him for wanting you to arrive home safe and sound.

When you walk back towards him, a weak smirk stretches across your face before you shake your head. "It's nothing," you reassure him. "It's not you."

The space in between his eyebrows furrows at your words. What do you mean by that? He's trying to study your face under the dim streetlight though all he can see is the faint outlines of your features.

"Thank you for walking me home."

The action catches Yoongi off-guard, but when you wrap your arms around his waist, cheek coming to a rest on his collarbone, he acts as if on autopilot, leisurely draping his limbs across your back. Man, despite you laying it down on him so strongly that you're cold all the time the hug feels pretty damn warm and cozy. He can sense your heartbeat through the layers of fabric, the swell of your breasts pressed against his chest –

Oh God.

Unfurling his arms, he releases you from his hold, stumbling a step backward before things can escalate any further. He's not supposed to have these thoughts – not about you.

You take the hint, your own limbs dropping to your sides as you send him one last look, the corners of your lips tugging upwards ever so slightly. And then you turn on your heel, leaving for good.

He waits until you've entered your apartment, a light igniting on the fifth floor an indicator that you have, but even then he can't seem to set foot until several minutes have passed.

It's still pitch-dark inside when Yoongi returns, the slivers of moonlight shining through the windows serving as his sole guide. Silently hanging his set of keys onto the keychain holder, he shuffles his way back into the living room.

In the meantime, Seokjin must have moved to his bedroom as no traces of him or the pillows and blankets on the floor are to be seen. He usually does that when the boys are over and they end up falling asleep with not enough space for everyone.

Steering his gaze to the left, he witnesses Namjoon's tall stature splayed out on the now entirely vacant couch, back turned towards him.

Realizing there's no need for him to retreat to the recliner, Yoongi stealthily moves past the sleeping bodies of his friends in search of his bedroom.

"Thank you, hyung," the deep timbre of Namjoon's voice suddenly sounds, just above a whisper but enough to startle him.

"What for?" he inquires, confused at his friend's words and the fact that he's still awake.

"For taking care of _____."

Clubs aren't Yoongi's terrain. He avoids them like a disease, the sole thought of being surrounded by sweaty strangers grinding on each other to shitty, repetitive music so loud it almost bursts your eardrums forcing him to gag. Yet here he is, sulky though dressed to impress – in his eyes – as he patiently waits for the rest of the group to finish up. He's well aware that he could have declined, but at the same time he didn't want to. She's gonna be there.

It's minutes later when the front door finally opens, revealing Hoseok first, followed closely by Namjoon – and then there's you.

This has to be some sort of fever dream. He's at high risk of being caught, but Yoongi can't take his eyes off of you. Your pearl-white dress paired with the matching heels sends his head reeling, the hemline of your skirt stopping about mid-thigh causing a blush to creep up on his cheeks. But he can't lose his cool in front of everyone. That would be stupid and weird – and not to mention outright treacherous.

"Ready to go?" Seokjin questions, clutching his car keys as the designated driver of the night.

Everyone quickly assembles at the front door except for Yoongi who takes a second to gather his thoughts.

"Are you coming?"

Yoongi lifts his head at the inquiry. When he realizes it's you who posed the question with your frame turned towards him, his heart starts pounding in his chest like a pump gun. If only you understood the insinuation behind those words... "Y-yeah, sure," he chokes out before clambering off the couch, and so the group steps outside to Seokjin's car.

"Hyung." Hoseok puts a hand on Yoongi's shoulder. "We already pre-gamed a little. You gotta sit in the back, or I get car sick."

Yoongi peers behind Hoseok's form, eyes landing on you. They're gonna make you sit in the middle because Namjoon would block the view through the rear window. He's fucked.

Without posing any further questions, he climbs into the right backseat. When you settle down next to him not even a second after, it's like all signs of lifeform leave him – his breathing becomes shallow, his heartbeat flatlines. Not even a single muscle moves.

Your bare thigh comes into contact with his when you squirm around in search of the buckle. "Oops, sorry." A small smile flashes across your face when you notice. "I think it's on your side."

Yoongi tries his hardest to avoid eye contact with you. He wouldn't survive it in this close proximity. "A-ah, yeah..." he mumbles, maneuvering his legs closer to the door, giving you enough space to fumble.

The entire ride to the club he remains silent, his racing thoughts drowning out the chatter in the background. He's so unbelievably fucked.

The majority of the time Yoongi spends at the bar, downing beer after beer to wash away the chaos inside his mind – though what he deemed his remedy at first turns out to be his poison instead. After the third beer, it's impossible to ignore the way your hair sways along with your movements, how well your snug dress hugs your silhouette, and how smooth your bare arms and legs look.

"Alright," you pipe over the loud music after swallowing your shot of tequila, "I'll be back on the dancefloor again." Sliding down the bar stool, you shoot a look at the boys, both Hoseok and Namjoon tagging along with you.

Seokjin sends an affirmative nod your way before turning back to the bartender, engaging in their current conversation.

Even among the crowd it's easy to spot you, the satin fabric of your garment causing you to stand out like a sore thumb. In Yoongi's eyes you easily lighten up this sleazy place though, this pit of hell where everyone devours each other with indecent looks. You're like an angel among demons, wearing that sweet smile of yours like a halo, glowing with understanding and genuine interest – only it isn't directed at him but Namjoon in this scenario instead.

He watches your face turn into something darker though when his friend leans in closer towards you, whispering something in your ear.

Oh... Fuck.

He can't do this right now. Not now, not like this.

Without giving it much thought, Yoongi gets up from his seat. "I'm gonna step out for a second," he informs Seokjin before trudging towards the backdoor.

Once he sets foot onto the asphalt of the back alley and the door shuts behind him with a loud thud, an exasperated sigh escapes him. The air is cold and crisp with a hint of humidity from a prior rain shower. "Fuck..." The curse comes out audibly this time. Walking around in circles, his hands come up multiple times to run through his tousled locks. Why does he feel so strongly about this situation? You're just a girl, some random girl, that one of his closest friends since childhood happens to have a crush on. Yeah, you're kind and you're smart, beautiful and funny... But why does all of that matter to him? Why does it bother him so much seeing you with him that his insides churn at the sole thought of it?

He fell for you. He actually fell for you.

The realization has Yoongi forcing out a laugh in disbelief.

"There you are."

A familiar voice brings him back from his manic trip.

"I found you."

Looking over to the side, he almost regrets his decision. Even underneath the dim streetlights and the red hue of the neon sign plastered on the concrete wall you look stunning. Pull your fucking shit together, he tells himself. So he musters up the faintest of smiles at the source of the voice.

Your heels click on the asphalt as you make your way over to him, the surface still wet from the rain as it emits a splashing sound with each step. When you lean next to him against the wall, you let out a soft whine along with a chuckle before retracting from the surface in lightning speed. "Ah, it's cold."

Yoongi can't help but react with a soft chortle. "And wet," he adds, shrugging off his leather jacket in an attempt to throw it over your shoulders though you don't comply.

"Oh no," you fend. "I'll just go back inside where it's warm. I only wanted to cool off for a bit."

For some reason, your words render him even more eager in his proposition. "Don't be ridiculous. Put it on, please."

"Really, I came out for a breather, and that's what I got. Besides," you gesture towards him, "you're wearing short sleeves again–"

"And you're practically half-naked, so don't try to argue with me." It takes him a second to register what came out of his mouth, so when you look up at him with a dumbfounded expression, he immediately backtracks from his statement. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean it like that. I'm just–"

"You're just trying to be nice. I know," you finish for him.

Even though he would usually word it this way, there's more to it that he refrains from revealing. The alcohol coursing through his veins serves as a strong opponent though, clouding his senses.

With outstretched arms and pouty lips, you let him drape the heavy clothing over your torso, carefully looping your limbs through the sleeves. The sight of you standing there like a sulky child has him suppressing laughter.

"What?" You eye him, a glint evident in your glare before it softens again.

A small smile stretches across the man's lips, hinting at a confusing blend of endearment and disappointment. "Nothing," he simply states. He's in it – deep in it – with no way out. God, he wants to tell you that you're the most beautiful thing he's ever laid eyes on even though it would be wrong to admit.

"Can I ask you a question?" you finally break the palpable silence.

He gulps, unsure of your possible inquiry, but ultimately nods his head yes.

"It's two questions actually." Licking your lips, you shift your focus to a nearby puddle, the reflection of the light coming from the neon sign gifting it with more depth than it probably possesses. "Does Namjoon happen to have a crush on me?"

You come in straight with the facts, so Yoongi is taken aback, confused over how to go about it. "Uh..." he stammers, hand shooting up to scratch at the nape of his neck.

There are so many possible outcomes to this conversation. If he tells you the truth, things end right here, right now. Do not pass Go, do not collect 200 dollars. Does he think Namjoon should've confessed a long time ago? Yes, absolutely. Does he have it in his heart to shorten the process and do it himself instead? Absolutely not. First of all, it's Namjoon's wish to keep it a secret until he musters up enough courage to do so (which Yoongi can only so much as scoff at but still respect), and second and most important of all, there's this lingering fear of you reciprocating his friend's feelings – which isn't too far off of reality from the looks of it.

Realizing he hasn't given you a proper reply yet, Yoongi continues, "Well–"

"So it's true then." You cross your arms in front of your chest, your eyes finding his again boring into them with intent.

"I didn't say that," Yoongi counters, his glare holding yours in an attempt to ignore that glimpse of your cleavage framed by his jacket. It's not an easy feat as your folded arms give it an extra push, the pendant of your necklace sitting neatly atop of it.

"Yoongi, it's not like any of you are exactly subtle about it."

The words leave your lips in such a deadpan way, that trace of indifference within your answer shocking Yoongi as if you don't share the same sentiment. "Then why do you ask if you're so sure about it?" he fends in retaliation, finding no energy in himself to fight against your rebuttal. There's no reason to backtrack now. "Why do you ask me and not Namjoon?"

"I guess I..." The space in between your eyebrows creases. "I don't wanna have to break his heart."

Now it's Yoongi's turn to look at you in confusion. "W-what do you mean?"

He doesn't miss the way you roll your bottom lip in between your teeth, your eyes once dead set on him now avoiding the intensity of his. "Don't get me wrong. I like Namjoon, I really do – just not in that way."

For a second the world seems to stand still, your words slowly sinking into Yoongi's mind. He had it all wrong this entire time since you were dead convincing. Were you just playing some sick, twisted mind game all along?

You continue, "He's a great guy and everything, and I'm probably stupid for not seeing something that could potentially be there. But it's not him I'm interested in." Running a hand through your hair, you let out a loud huff. "I know I'm gonna have to tell him eventually. The thought already stresses me out."

"Namjoon appreciates honesty. Just right out tell him how you feel," Yoongi explains calmly despite the chaos raging inside of him. Honesty. His and Namjoon's friendship has never been of the complicated type, built on nothing but trust. Now he's committing the biggest crime in their twenty years of brotherhood, his eyes lingering on the sparkly sheen of your lips for a second too long wondering what they would taste like contradicting every principle he's trying to uphold. But wait – what do you mean it's not him I'm interested in?

"Yeah, you're right." Your words pull him out of his trance. "I'll talk to him as soon as I can."

Yoongi mirrors that weak smirk spreading across your face. "What's the other question?"

"Huh?"

"You said you had two questions," he recalls.

"Oh, yeah..."

It's quiet for an instance as he watches you deep in thought, struggling with whatever occupies your mind before you shake your head.

"Nevermind."

"Come on." His brows furrow at your curt reply. "Tell me."

"No, it's stupid," you counter, an embarrassed expression taking over your features.

"Nothing you say could ever be stupid." He doesn't think twice about the words leaving his lips, ignoring this weird mixture of regret and shame surging through him. "You brought it up, so just–"

"Do you have a crush on me, too?" you blurt out, eyes set on Yoongi's like your life depends on it.

It's almost as if all sense of being leaves him, his limbs growing rigid and his breath being knocked out of his lungs. How the fuck is he going to go about this? "What?" he merely responds, still in shock.

You blink up at him a couple of times, lips trembling as if you're about to elaborate – though you retract instead. "Forget it." Still facing him, you take a step backward before turning on your heel.

It can't be more than a split second, but within that time frame a million thoughts cross through Yoongi's mind. You have to suspect him for you to ask this question in the first place which poses several questions: how obvious has he been this entire time and why would you want to know the answer? Is it to ridicule him? Is it something entirely else? Whatever the answer may be, Yoongi needs to know – no matter the cost. "Don't," he croaks out, almost unconvincing in the way his voice wavers. "Don't go."

You watch him with wistful eyes as you turn around again, arms still crossed in front of your chest.

"What would you do if I said yes?" Usually, he would set the record straight right away, but this is unlike any other situation Yoongi has ever experienced before. Your presence alone renders him insecure yet the alcohol coursing through his veins causes him to come up with somewhat courageous statements like these.

Taking another step closer towards him, you lean against the wall beside you, one leg leisurely resting in front of the other. "I guess you're gonna find out."

With an incredulous chuckle, he mirrors your movements though his hands bury into the pockets of his jeans instead. You're not even two feet apart from each other, enough for him to feel the heat radiating off of your body. "What makes you so sure about that?"

Despite the shake of your head, the man can still make out the smirk stretching across your face. "Two things: one, you're stalling. If you wanted to say no, you already would've said so. And two," you lick your lips before drawing them into a thin line, "simple intuition."

"Intuition?" he repeats.

"Mhm," you hum out. "Maybe."

Another chortle escapes him. How has this turned into a cat and mouse game? And who is who?

"Or maybe you're just insanely obvious," you fend, a mischievous grin finding its way onto your features.

"Me?" He scoffs. "Obvious?"

A sole nod of your head seals your answer, and maybe his mind is playing tricks on him, but Yoongi swears he can sense some sort of chemistry brewing in between the both of you. But then again, why would you show any signs of interest in him? He's him and you're...you. Perfect, stellar _____ whom his best friend is pining for. He's stuck between a rock and a hard place, unable to deny his feelings yet the idea of Namjoon's heart being crushed comes to the forefront of his mind. Although the sheer thought of losing you tears him apart equally as bad as hypothetically losing his closest companion since childhood.

In hindsight, he wonders if things would've turned out different, if things could've been avoided, had Namjoon confessed to you and had you reciprocated. Yoongi wouldn't have developed feelings for you – at least he believes so. Now he's so deep in shit he doesn't see any way out of it without someone getting the short end of the stick. Either way someone's going to get hurt, and he decides it rather be him instead.

"Cat got your tongue?"

Yoongi comes back to life at the sound of your voice, the soft lilt alluding to your ignorance.

"Would it make things easier for you if–"

His brows furrow in surprise when you step closer to him, so close that you're almost chest to chest.

"–I said I liked you back?"

Did he hear you right? Did you just imply that you– There's no way. This can't be real. "What kinda sick joke is this?" The words leave his lips without much thought.

Now it's your turn to look at him in confusion, eyebrows creased with a deep-set frown. "What?"

Huffing out in frustration, Yoongi declares more deadpan than he prefers, "You're right – I like you, _____. And you say you like me, but..." He stalls, the residue of alcohol complicating the process of keeping his emotions in check. He can't have an outburst happen in front of you. The situation is already complicated enough as is. "Why do you act like that around Namjoon? I don't understand."

You look like you're about to reply with the way your bottom lip quivers, a hint of tears forming in the corners of your eyes, but a rusty creak along with a loud slam of metal and an all-too-familiar deep voice have you both turning your heads towards the door.

Shit.

"Namjoon," you two mumble in unison before rushing back inside.

Yoongi can already hear the commotion when you enter the hallway connecting the back entrance with the main room.

"Dude, calm down. What's going on?" Hoseok holds the younger man by the arm to stop him from storming past the crowd.

Namjoon looks back at the two of you. His nostrils are flared and his jaw set – Yoongi is scared he might pounce on him any second.

When his friend finally releases himself from Hoseok's hold and stalks over to you, he instinctively pulls you behind him. He knows Namjoon would never hurt anybody, but the thought of you being in this mess in your vulnerable state sends him into protector mode.

"I should've known," he starts. "It was crystal clear this entire time, but I didn't wanna accept it. Well," running a hand through his dirty blonde strands, he continues, "now I have proof."

"Joon, let me explain." Yoongi tries to defuse the situation. "It's not–"

"It's not what it looks like? Is that what you're trying to say?" Letting out a scoff, his stare shoots even more daggers at the shorter male now. "So I didn't see you confessing your feelings to the girl I like just seconds ago? This was all in my imagination then?"

Yoongi's mouth turns dry, a lump forming in his throat. "Joon, just hear me out–"

"Oh, I think I've heard more than enough." Clasping his head in his hands, he continues, "I didn't think you would stab me in the fucking back like that."

"Namjoon!" It's Hoseok's voice now calling the male's name in warning.

Another curse escapes him before he leans in closer towards you.

He might be mistaken, but Yoongi's hand suddenly feels heavier, another set of fingers weaving their way through his in search of comfort.

"Good luck with the virgin," Namjoon snarls, his eyes traveling from you to the male beside you.

"Kim Namjoon!" Seokjin steps in this time, fury evident in his face before said man can make his way to the exit, leaving everyone in shock.

Yoongi's ears fall deaf after that, a pit opening in the depths of his stomach, every fiber of his being becoming numb. He's neither particularly ashamed nor proud of this fact, but the way the words came out of Namjoon's mouth has him almost toppling over in disbelief.

He doesn't understand what's happening around him, but when what he believes to be your head drops onto his shoulder, he comes back to his senses. The contact is fleeting though as you detangle yourself from his grip.

"I'm sorry," you murmur, and without taking a look back, you disappear within the crowd, someone calling your name over and over again without an answer.

It's then that Yoongi realizes he and Seokjin are the only ones left.

"Stay here," the elder signalizes him, following your trail through the club.

Fuck. Fuck! How could things have gotten so uncontrollably out of hand? There's an uncomfortable tightness forming in Yoongi's chest, wrapping around him like a rope. Is this going to be the end of his and Namjoon's two-decade-old friendship? Is he going to lose one of his closest confidants because of a girl? The thought leaves a bitter taste on his tongue. You're not just some random girl – you're far more than that. He despises himself for even thinking of diminishing your worth, his heart clenching in disgust, yet there's no way this can be the end of things. He should've never fallen for you.

Your mind must be racing as well though, Yoongi concludes. You basically confirmed that you have feelings for him as well – if what you said was the truth because, after all, you have been heavily flirting with Namjoon in front of Yoongi. If so, how are they going to hold up after this mess? And – the idea has him swallowing down hard – are you turned off by the fact that he's a virgin?

His priorities are all over the place right now. Is he going to have to make a choice between you and his friend? Or are you both going to abandon him maybe? Fuck...

"Yoongi!" The familiar sound of Seokjin's voice appears at the perfect time, catching him before he can fall deeper into despair. "Let's go home."

"What about _____?" he inquires, not realizing your name slipping off his tongue first instead of Namjoon's.

"She's in the car," the elder explains. "Hoseok and Namjoon are taking an Uber home."

There's nothing much Yoongi can offer besides a solemn nod before following Seokjin outside to the parking lot.

The dusty green of his roommate's old Honda Civic comes into view, and for a second Yoongi considers taking the seat next to you when he catches a glimpse of you through the window, head hung low and hair falling in front of your face. The sight has him opting for the passenger seat instead.

Most of the car ride remains calm, not even the radio playing any sort of music. An incoming call from Hoseok informs everyone that he and Namjoon arrived at home safely and that the man – though still somewhat in distress – will be alright and won't do anything stupid in his drunken state. Yoongi is more than thankful for the eldest's sobriety and clear mind in this situation though it only does so much easing the nervous shaking of his leg and the incessant picking of his cuticles.

It's not long before you arrive at your apartment complex, once the car comes to a halt your fragile voice filling the silence. "Thanks for the ride. Goodnight." And without sparing one single glance, you climb out of the vehicle, shutting the door with a loud thud.

Silence settles again, no one daring to speak until Seokjin moves to ignite the engine again. It comes to life with a spluttering roar when suddenly the door to the passenger seat opens.

"Yoongi!" Seokjin calls out for the younger male only to be answered by the door slamming shut again.

You're already rummaging around for your house keys when his voice stops you in your tracks.

"_____, wait." He breathes out, a cloud of mist forming in the air. It's only then that he realizes how cold it has actually become – and that he's still without his jacket.

You slowly turn around, your arms wrapped around you for comfort.

The look you send Yoongi hits him straight in the chest. It's dim under the light of the entrance to your apartment complex, yet he can spot the streaks of runny mascara around your eyes. "Are you okay?" he asks, his voice small and unsure.

Your arms fall to your sides lethargically. It's quiet for a long time before you speak up. "I didn't mean for any of this to happen. I'm sorry, I messed everything up."

Yoongi vehemently shakes his head at your apology. "You have nothing to apologize for. It's not your fault."

At that, you mimic his gesture, a small whimper resonating from you as fresh tears start to form again. "Earlier, you asked me why I act that way when I'm with Namjoon..." You stall, visibly swallowing down a lump in your throat. "At first it was because I wanted to give it a serious shot. I could tell he liked me, and I was actually considering it. But my heart just wasn't in the right place."

The first tears trickle down your cheeks. "So I thought if I ended things early I wouldn't have a reason to stick around anymore."

The space in between Yoongi's brows furrows at your explanation, but he lets you continue without interjecting.

"I was scared I wasn't gonna be able to be around you anymore, so instead I led Namjoon on and then this whole mess happened." In between heavy sniffles, the tears flow uncontrollably now.

Never in his life has Yoongi been so dumbfounded, so struck to silence by a hurtful truth. Words don't even come close to describing what he's experiencing in this moment, a mixture of frustration and disappointment concentrated in the core of his body, but something tugs on his heartstrings at the sight of you. Your presence comes across as frail, that damn black leather jacket almost swallowing you up entirely, engulfing you in darkness. It's kind of ironic, this comparison of images: Yoongi in his initial head-to-toe black attire if it wasn't for the white, slim-fit t-shirt on his torso, and you in your skimpy, white dress as your centerpiece though it's now being dominated by that foreign black piece of clothing. It's as if you traded pieces of each other, innocence and corruption cohabitating within the two of you – no one entirely good, no one entirely evil.

"God, I feel like such a whore!" you suddenly exclaim, your whines becoming louder. Burying your face in your hands, you cry with reckless abandon.

Yoongi is stunned at your response – and heartbroken that you would call yourself names like that. It wasn't an ideal approach, but at the end of the day everyone had their wrong-doings. He should've never given in to your advances, and Namjoon should've confessed to you.

It takes you a while to regain composure, and Yoongi feels compelled to console you though he refrains from it when you strut over to him, shrugging off the jacket in the process. "I'm not sure what kinda outcome I was expecting, but I didn't think it would tear you two apart like this." A huge question mark appears in Yoongi's head when you elaborate, your fist thrusting the heavy leather towards him which he takes with a slight delay. "I don't wanna take part in this if it means your friendship's on the line."

His soul leaves him in an instant, that unsettling feeling in the pit of his stomach tightening, tenfold in severity now. The worst-case scenario has come to life – he lost his best friend and he lost you.

"I'm so sorry," you murmur for the umpteenth time this night, and with that you turn around, unlocking the front door and leaving Yoongi alone in the dark as it clicks shut behind you.

Seconds upon seconds pass by as Yoongi tries to come to terms with what happened, a lightheaded sensation creeping up on him, causing him to collapse at the knees. Now he's in a crouched position on the concrete platform, dismissing the freezing cold nipping at his exposed skin. His elbows come to a rest on his bent joints, his hands clasping around his head as if to shield himself from the outside world. Fuck... Fuck! There's no way things are going to go back to the way they were. Everything's fucked.

"Hey, man." Yoongi discerns Seokjin's voice beside him. "Come on, let's get you home."

The elder hoists him up by the shoulders, retrieving the leather garment that lifelessly lies on the ground to throw it over his shivering form.

"Hyung..." Yoongi mumbles out. "I fucked up."

755 notes · View notes

01solarsmiles · 3 years

Text

01solarsmiles’ kitchen nightmares: [day off]

a/n: it’s like a commercial break. easy on the eyes and quick for me to bullsh*t my way through.

warnings: suggestive at the end.

w/c: <0.7k

tag list; @stayinzencity @floraljae @thoreeo <3

You finally get home, after a long shift at work and a an even more tiring week of work, and throw yourself onto your sofa, throwing caution to the wind as you somehow fling your bra across the room without hooking your fingers properly at the clasp.

Face first in a pile of pillows, you breathe out a groan, praying not to have to deal with customers for the next 42 hours.

Your feet are barely alive, throbbing from walking around all day. Briefly, you think about staying here in this position but decide against it when you remember you have things to be doing -- like sleeping for the next twelve hours before anyone would be successful at stirring you. Besides, your bed was far more comfortable than the sofa, no matter how much your limbs screamed at you, begging to rest for a few minutes longer.

“Just a few more minutes,” you whisper to the dark, not having bothered turning the lights on, “I’ll shower and then go to bed. I have to.”

Your eyes remained closed while you felt your way around your nightly shower routine. Afterwards, you hesitated at putting on an oversized shirt, thinking that it would be easier to go without, but decided against going nude for the sake of not getting a cold in your sleep as your hair dried.

Returning to your bed, you notice that your phone screen was lit-up, a notification from the work WhatsApp group chat. Sungchan was complaining (on main!) about his job title.

“For heaven’s sake,” you mutter, wondering why he couldn’t have double checked the job being advertised or even saying something at his interview when he first joined.

Without thinking twice, you tap out a response.

you bro why are you incapable of clearing some dishes like fr it’s not that deep

fullsun fr fr yn always spitting straight fax this why we love yn

taeyongie (manager) sungchan, we have discussed this. like when you first joined -- and it wasn’t a problem then so i’m not following as to why it would be now?

jofam he didn’t read his job description,, can’t have someone who doesn’t do the bare minimum on jcc… tune in next week for model mcshizzle or classroom stuff; ion remember

you well i thought we were all capable human beings here

“chef” doyoung :| i’m on jcc next stop telling every to leak my newds on twt

kun (half manager) this is why i only deal with like two of you on a daily basis

chef yuta i can’t order food and i have qualifications so why do you think sungchan was gonna read his job description bahaha

sungchan how do i

sungchan delete myself

sungchan from this gc

At this, you giggle. It’s been a long day for everyone and despite your initial thoughts of this conversation going in the complete opposite direction, you were pleasantly surprised.

Sometimes the people you worked with were the sole reason you paid any attention to what was going on around you. Days have been wishy-washy recently, you head all over the pace but finally somewhere much better than it had been in months.

Next steps: get your gp to spell your name correct when they text you about appointments.

Tonight, you know you’ll lay, thinking about the deliverboob guy that shouted at you for telling you his number would be ready in ten minutes after he had waited the first ten minutes you had told him, knowing that he was probably going to be mad but also just telling him what you were told by the managers dealing with takeaway, and you think, Yeah. Tomorrow will be just about the same.

At least Jaehyun was a good flirt in and outside of work.

You quickly take a snap that you deem teasing enough to grab his attention but innocent enough to pretend you didn’t know what you were doing and caption it with something suggestive.

You got the fastest response you’d had in a long time from that man.

He’ll be over in ten, he says. You know he lives a twenty minute electric scooter ride away but don’t question it.

Which reminds you, Yuta didn’t prepare the meat like he said he would for marinating overnight.

Sighing, you sit up and change into a night shirt, knowing you'll be sewing the buttons back on tomorrow morning before work, “At least someone’s meat is getting marinted tonight.”

taeyongie (manager) need you at work tomorrow. soz you can have the day after off :D

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wendimydarling · 4 years

Text

Hello! I’m so very grateful that you’ve stumbled upon my blog and have chosen to read my stories. In this list you’ll discover all of my works, both big and small, and my hope is that you’ll find some healthy escape for awhile within these digital pages, and perhaps some sound advice along the way.

I do not lay claim to any of the characters or Henry himself (as much as a girl can dream, right?), however all ideas, plot lines, original characters and writing is my own. I EXPRESSLY DO NOT GIVE PERMISSION FOR ANY OF MY WORK TO BE COPIED OR REPOSTED. That shouldn’t have to be said and I hate doing it, but unfortunately, that is the world we live in.

Small key:

* means fluff ** means smut *** means dark smut, please heed warnings and tread lightly - All of my readers are female; being female, that is what I write best. So sorry to anyone looking for male/male! - All Henry photos are screencaps that the lovely @demivampirew took for me, and any other photos are stock photos found on the internet. I claim no ownership to any GIFs I’ve used either, all credit goes to the OG poster.

And now, onto the goodies!

~ No Mercy** - Henry’s girlfriend has a silent surprise in store for him at home. (Henry’s POV, fem!dom hinted switch)

~ Don’t Touch** - Henry receives a lesson on how his girl likes to be touched. (Henry’s POV, fem!dom)

~ Sucker** - Henry gives the reader an extra special birthday present. (First Person Reader, fem!dom switch, birthday gift for @luclittlepond)

~ Brat Tamer** - Henry teaches the reader a lesson in patience. (First Person Reader, male!dom) | Part Two |

~ I Miss You** - Henry and the reader have phone sex. (First Person Reader, Long-Distance Relationship, Angst)

~ The First Time*&** - A collection of Henry’s firsts with the reader. (First Person Reader, fluff)

~ I’m Glad You’re Here** - The reader takes care of Henry while he’s sick. (First Person Reader, a smidge of innuendo)

~ Day One*&** - A catalog of events on the day Henry’s kids are born. (First Person Reader, mostly fluff, some smut)

~ The Thirst is Real** - What happens when our own @littlefreya and Henry meet to discuss the happenings of Tumblr? (Third Person, smutty fluff, birthday present)

~ Please Don’t Leave Me* - The reader finally opens up about her past trauma with Henry. (First Person Reader, angst, fluff, birthday present)

Appreciation:

~ His Laugh* ~ Fire* ~ Have You Noticed?* ~ Elmo’s Got a Crush* ~ He Can Wear Anything* ~ Kissing* ~ Favorite Look* ~ Dear Henry*

Imagines/Drabbles:

~ Kal and His Pup* - Kal looks after Baby Cavill. ~ Piano Lesson* - You teach Henry a simple song on the piano. ~ Reassurance* - Henry comforts you. ~ Dancing* - Henry entertains you while you make dinner. ~ Jealous Justice** - Henry reminds you who you belong to. ~ Gym Pampering* - You give Henry a massage after leg day. ~ Horses* - Henry take your mind off things with a ride. ~ Quaran-tash* - You try to get Henry to get rid of his mustache. ~ Surfaces** - You and Henry test every spot in the house. ~ Prisoner** - Henry gives you oral. SONG DRABBLES: ~ Rock You Like a Hurricane - Two-sentence drabble based on the second stanza of the song. ~ Ride All Night - Henry takes the reader on a beach picnic for her birthday. ~ Sucker - Henry gives the reader an extra special birthday present. ~ Tenerife Sea - Henry answers an interviewer’s question about his fiance. ~ Rewrite the Stars - Henry and the reader have a tense moment. ~ Peer Pressure - Henry is edged by his girlfriend via a long distance phone call. ~ Hold My Girl - Henry consoles his pre-teen daughter. ~ The Sound of Silence - Henry takes a walk with Kal and thinks about his life. ~ All About That Bass - Henry and his girl have a bet at the gym.

~ Ground Sparring** - Syverson finds a worthy opponent in a wrestling match. (First Person Reader, OFC, Shower Sex) | Part 1 | Part 2 |

~ Sweater Weather** - Syverson and the Reader spend a weekend away in a cabin after he gets back from tour. (First Person Reader, Oral Sex, birthday gift for @cavillryarchive)

~ Weakness - After a fight, Syverson teaches his wife to mind. (First Person Reader, Tickle Fic)

Imagines/Drabbles:

~ Oral** ~ Lactation** ~ I Want to Watch You*&** SONG DRABBLES: ~ Trumpets - Syverson watches his wife get ready for bed. ~ Motivation - The reader helps Syverson cope with PTSD. ~ Toxic (Sir, Yes Sir) & Love is A Battlefield (That’s An Order) - The reader and Syverson have private thoughts about the other.

~ Revenge*&** - Walter gets revenge on his wife. (POV switch, First Person Reader, Tickle Fic)

~ Tomorrow (Walk Me Home)* - Walter gets home late from work and comforts his Little after she has a nightmare. (Walter Third Person POV, OFC, dd/lg)

SONG DRABBLES: ~ Closer (Miranda) - Walter frisks the reader. ~ Say Something - Walter has a difficult choice to make. ~ Walk Me Home (Tomorrow) - Walter gets home late from work and comforts his Little after she has a nightmare.

~ Who Do You Work For?*** - August is captured and tortured for information. (August’s POV, ffff/m fem!dom)

~ The Chair*** - An additional scene from Trapped, takes place after Part Seven. (First Person Reader)

~ The Hammer and The Widow** - August and Alanna spend the eve of the big heist battling for dominance. (Third Person Reader, fem!dom/male!dom switch)

~ Cover the Mirrors*** - Vampire!August has his sights set on new prey. (First Person Reader, OFC, DARK)

SONG DRABBLES: ~ A Man Alone - August watches his lover sleep. ~ Sexy and I Know It & Hungry Like the Wolf - August stalks a night club to find a snack. ~ Like A Virgin - August plays with his lover during aftercare. ~ Smooth Criminal (Mine) - August watches as his wife tortures and kills someone for sport. ~ Earned It (The Hammer and The Widow) - August and Alanna spend the eve of the big heist battling for dominance. ~ Summertime - August watches his lover and their newborn. ~ Chasing Cars - The reader muses about solar mythology and August. ~ Work From Home - The reader’s thoughts about August when he’s away.

~ Who’s in Charge?** - Napoleon discovers who is the alpha in his relationship. (Illya Kuryakin x Gabby Teller x Napoleon Solo, fem!dom, Third Person Reader)

~ Convenience** - Clark finds a place to sleep for the night. (POV switch, Third Person Reader, OFC, Angst)

SONG DRABBLES: ~ Blue Jeans (Convenience) - Clark finds a place to sleep for the night. ~ Wrecking Ball - Lana talks about her first boyfriend.

SONG DRABBLES:

~ When Doves Cry - Temperature play with Geralt. (First Person Reader drabble; smut)

~ Highway to Hell - Geralt watches a family have a picnic. (Third person drabble; Geralt’s POV; fluffy angst)

~ Toss a Coin to Your Witcher - Geralt allows Yen to have her way with him. (Third Person drabble; Geralt’s POV; fem!dom; smut)

~ Sexual Prowess** ~ Hogwarts House* ~ Ticklishness* ~ How They Tickle*&** ~ Kissing** ~ Handling a Breakup* ~ First Date* ~ Love Languages* ~ Greek Gods* ~ Necking**

~ 500 Event - Song Drabbles*&** ~ Sex Tips**

~ How I Got Started ~ Why Do I Write? ~ Ultimate Fantasy

~ Advice on Writing Smut ~ Where Do I get Inspiration? ~ Tips for Finding a Beta Writer ~ Building Relatable Characters Off Personal Experience ~ First, Second, and Third Person Usage ~ Different Types of Story Length

~ Raspberries* - @littlefreya - Henry Cavill takes his sweet time with you. (Second Person Reader, tickle fic)

~ Say It*&** - @thelastsock - Henry Cavill makes you beg, and you get revenge. (Second Person Reader, male!dom/fem!dom switch, tickle fic)

~ Be Still For Daddy*** - @brexrif - Geralt of Rivia throat-fucking filth. (Second Person Reader, male!dom, heavy smut)

~ Talented Tongue** & Heaven in Your Mouth** - @ladyreapermc - You and Henry take turns pleasuring each other. (Second Person Reader, oral sex)

#masterlist #fics

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sleepless-rain · 4 years

Text

Seijoh’s graduation trip plans

Translator: Leo | Sleepless-rain | Leoppii Editor: Troy Esaki | Kahluaplusmilk

“Continue on unwaveringly.”

Those were the words that Iwaizumi Hajime had said to Oikawa Tohru, who had stopped to turn back and look at him. It was fall at the time.

“You’re my partner and an utterly amazing setter.”

On this day, Aobajousai High School had lost in the semifinals at the Miyagi representative game of the spring volleyball tournament. And starting from that lost match, the third years were to retire.

Iwaizumi and Oikawa weren’t only the captain and vice-captain of the volleyball club. They had been together through junior high school and elementary school, more than half of their lives—up until now— was spent together on the courts as partners.

Iwaizumi’s words were blunt, unembellished and held no lies.

“Even if this team changes, that will not change. When the time comes I will take you down.”

Oikawa straightened himself and accepted Iwaizumi’s words of passion and friendship head-on.

“…Bring it on.”

And this story takes place a few months later.

TRANSLATORS NOTE: Please do NOT repost this translation ANYWHERE. If I see the whole thing elsewhere I will stop translating novel chapters and delete this one as well. Sharing small snippets are okay but not the whole thing. Please link back to this tumblr post if you want to share it.

“I want to eat curry… So how about India?” said Iwaizumi, wiping the sweat off with his arm.

“You serious?”

“The bar is suddenly set way too high.”

Matsukawa Issei and Hanamaki Takahiro grimace, sweat dripping from their chins.

It was followed by, “But I like naan.”

“I totally get you.”

“When you want to eat naan, you drop by the curry restaurant.”

“I don’t get you.”

A stream of consciousness about curry overlapped with one another until Hanamaki cut in, wringing out his towel, “But you know…Hawaii would be good. How about we go snorkeling?”

“That sounds good, ‘specially in this situation. Deciding between curry and the sea, the latter sounds far better,” Matsukawa answered, ceaselessly wiping his sweat and wringing out his towel.

Iwaizumi, who had suggested India clicked his tongue, “Tch.”

It was hot in here.

Actually, rather than hot it was boiling hot. Yearning for the cool blue sea over a curry filled with spices was no surprise.

As to why they were in a highly acclaimed sauna.

***

In their third year of high school, winter.

With no classes to attend and it being a long time since retiring from club activities, the former volleyball club third year members of Aobajousai High School, Iwaizumi, Hanamaki, and Matsukawa were left in a daze, and with so much free time they made their way around to various large bathhouses.

After making a big fuss over the electricity bath* with a waterfall feature* they headed into the sauna together. While sweating, the brainless discussion of “where would you go for your graduation trip? Assuming that money wasn’t an issue” blossomed: a way to occupy their free time.

“But you know I’d like to go to Las Vegas.”

“Because you want to gamble?”

“But it’s only fun if you actually have money.”

“Ah, there it is: the forbidden word,” Matsukawa pointed out in response to Iwaizumi’s frank reply, but he thoughtfully considered an alternative.

“If it isn’t a casino… there isn’t really any other place I’d want to go there. Okay then… hmmm, ah. Pandas. A tour of the panda’s homeland, China.”

“Well, if its pandas,” Hanamaki replied to Matsukawa’s panda suggestion, clapping his hands together. “Did you know there’s a whole tonne of pandas at the Wakayama Zoo? I saw it on TV recently.”

“Wakayama?”

“Oh, I bet you don’t know where Wakayama is, Iwaizumi.”

“Shut up.”

Wincing at Iwaizumi’s lack of affection, Hanamaki pulled himself together: “Anyway, even my towel has gotten hot so I think it’s about time to get out.”

“Same here, I can’t stand it anymore.” Matsukawa stood up, “What about you Iwaizumi?” he asked.

“I’m staying.”

“Okay, don’t push yourself.”

“Cold bath?”

“Cold bath.”

The two friends agreed whilst pushing open the heavy wooden door and exiting.

Left alone in the sauna, Iwaizumi crossed his arms, staring at the thermometer on the wall. There was nothing else to do.

He wasn’t sure how long he stayed like that, sweating buckets until he muttered, “Las Vegas, huh?” before taking his towel and violently wiping his face and his head. “I guess I really am a bit like a kaiju.” He said to himself, standing up and leaving the sauna drenched in sweat and in search of water.

***

After enjoying the baths and the sauna, the three tired boys found themselves in the large tatami room. Lined with tables and sitting cushions the room doubled as both a resting and a dining area.

An old fan swung its neck unsteadily, blowing a breeze in their direction. There seemed to be a TV somewhere in the room, as the sounds of the golf match commentary could be heard faintly. There were people watching the TV with a few beers, people lying down reading the comic books provided, and children playing the games they had brought.

Everyone in this bathhouse resting area was relaxing and doing as they pleased. And as for these three boys, they were testing the limits of their stomachs.

Of course, it didn’t start off as such a vicious scene. It was meant to be a light meal but there was a reason as to why it turned into a bloodthirsty battle.

After getting out of the baths and slipping into the jinbei* resembling pajamas, the three ordered a light meal, curry, and ramen, while resting. The place ran on a self-serve system, where you went to get your food from the counter when the number buzzer you were given went off. However, the pork cutlet curry Matsukawa had ordered still hadn’t been called out.

“You two eat first, or it will get cold and soggy,” Matsukawa, who was lying on the ground reading manga, told Iwaizumi and Hanamaki who had gone and returned with their curry and ramen.

“Then I’ll dig in.”

“Sorry.”

Without holding back the two took their spoons and chopsticks in their hands and began eating.

“I knew it, curry is the best.”

“That’s not even Indian styled curry! You’re okay with that? ”

“Yeah, because it’s curry.”

The boys continued to talk at the table, and everything was still alright. The trouble was yet to come.

Slurping his ramen Hanamaki called out to Iwaizumi beside him, “You were in there for a real long time.”

“Hm?” Iwaizumi responded with the spoon still in his mouth.

“You know, in the sauna.” He replied.

“Oh that. Isn’t that amount of time normal?”

“Are you serious?”

Their conversation ended there. Both of them focusing on the curry and ramen before them. It was just a meaningless conversation however someone reacted unexpectedly.

“Normal, huh…?”

It was Matsukawa, lying on the tatami.

Matsukawa couldn’t let their conversation – Iwaizumi’s “normal” - slip from his ears.

“‘Normal’ he said. Doesn’t that mean that the two of us that left earlier are weaker than normal?”

At that moment his buzzer went off beeping.

Matsukawa got up, “Oh, it’s finally done.”

Hanamaki eyed him whilst sipping the ramen broth from his spoon and asked: “Yours is the only one that took so long, what did you order?”

“Me? Pork cutlet curry.”

“Oh, one of those things that take time to fry… wait, that’s not something you eat after getting out of the sauna!? Your stomach must be strong.”

Upon hearing that Matsukawa glanced at Iwaizumi who was drinking water. And as if he were waiting for it, a smug smile crossed his face, “You think so? Having pork cutlet curry is pretty normal.” He taunted, picking up the beeping number buzzer to get his pork cutlet curry, ambling towards the counter. Someone glared at the figure strangely overflowing with confidence.

“‘Normal’… you say?” It was Iwaizumi, spoon in hand. “Normal? Then me eating plain curry means I’m weaker than that?”

The golf commentary from the TV, the manga, the faint breeze blowing intermittently, the curry and ramen, all of it relaxing and warm. This heaven-like peace enveloping the resting and dining area unfolded into a sudden battlefield.

Iwaizumi stuffed the remainder of his curry into his mouth vigorously before slowly standing up. “I’m going to get extra gyoza,” he said.

Taken aback by the sudden dangerous aura emanating from Iwaizumi, Hanamaki winced “S-sure…”. His hands stopped over his ramen, the atmosphere created by former ace Iwaizumi could have easily been mistaken for the middle of a match.

And soon after Matsukawa returned with his tray of curry.

“Huh, where’s Iwaizumi?”

“Mm? Oh- uh seems like he went to get some gyoza.”

“…I see.”

Seating himself leisurely onto a sitting cushion, Matsukawa took his spoon in his hand and sighed, “Facing off pork cutlet curry with gyoza, pathetic.”

“What? What are you talking about? Both of you have been acting really weird since a while ago! Is this some kind of inside-joke?”

Hanamaki put down his chopsticks without thinking and upon noticing change in Matsukawa’s attitude Iwaizumi had returned with a “hey.” The clear plastic container in his hand contained eight gyoza. On top of that, another box stuffed with 200grams of chicken karaage. Seeing the extra meat, Hanamaki just feigned a smile.

“Hey, I know you went to all the trouble of buying that but I’m full from the ramen, I can’t eat that.”

Iwaizumi didn’t even spare Hanamaki a glance, staring down unblinkingly at Matsukawa who was eating his cutlet leisurely in declaration of war, “All of it is mine.”

Matsukawa stared back, putting down his fork and rising to his feet to accept Iwaizumi’s challenge, “Bring it on.”

“What is it with you guys!? Matsukawa, why are you standing? Sit down!”

The downside of war is that there are always innocents who get dragged in. And without listening to the confused Hanamaki, the pointless battle began.

Thirty minutes had passed. After eating his pork cutlet curry, yakisoba, grilled onigiri, Matsukawa now sat with what he claimed ‘dessert’, slurping down tapioca filled milk tea.

An exhausted Hanamaki asked: “Isn’t tapioca made from some sort of potato, doesn’t that make this more of a food than a drink? Why are you eating little balls of potato after a meal?”

“Because they were selling it.”

“Even if you want to look cool drinking that, you don’t.”

“I’m not trying to look cool.”

“You are! I heard you when you said ‘pathetic’ and all that other stuff. ”

While Hanamaki and Matsukawa were going back and forth, Iwaizumi returned with another plate piled high with freshly made fries.

“Potatoes! More potatoes! Why are you both eating piles of potatoes!? It’s practically another meal! What’s with you two?! My stomach hurts just watching you. I’m begging you both, please stop!”

The bystander Hanamaki had given up and Matsukawa, who was probing for pearls with the end of his straw, and Iwaizumi, who was throwing a handful of fries into his mouth, stopped. They looked at each other and nodded.

“Let stop it here then since you’re insisting.”

“Right.”

“You’re pretty strong.”

“Same to you.”

Hanamaki glanced at the two shaking hands over the good showdown they had had, clutching his stomach and rolling on the tatami groaning, “The damage runs deep…”

Having mercy on Hanamaki, who suddenly gave in, and having come to terms with the power they both held, both of them turned back to the table. Instead of eating at top speed they ate at the pace they pleased, sipping tapioca and munching on fries. This peaceful scene is what you would have called a warriors break.

“I think I ate a bit too much.”

“It’s because we haven’t been exercising recently.”

“I guess so.”

“How about we show our faces at club practice tomorrow?”

“Sure.”

After eating and drinking until they were full, they leant against the wall, satisfied. It was a warm, comforting moment. Taking a hot bath, unwinding in the sauna, eating a good meal, the fan gently carrying a breeze towards them— It was a moment of bliss.

Eyes closed and exhaustion finally settling in, everything was disrupted by music playing loudly through the speakers in the resting area.

“Huh? Seems like something’s starting…” an almost asleep Hanamaki woke up, startled.

“Look at that…!” Eyes wide, he pointed out at the open area outside.

Iwaizumi and Matsukawa stood up to look over.

A low stage had been unknowingly set up, a group of elderly people who had just gotten out of the baths and enjoying a beer gathered around it, microphones held gleefully in their hands. The sound of unknown old men singing enka songs roared through the resting area.

“I didn’t think they’d have karaoke here.”

“I can’t sleep like this.”

“This blows.”

For these three high school boys with little life experience, and it was a little too early to be battling it out in enka songs. Slipping past the old men excited by songs of mountains and waterfalls, death and killing, the three boys shuffled out of the resting and dining area, leaving it all behind.

***

Escaping the enka hell the three boys, wearing the indoor slippers, stumbled upon an arcade.

“Oh, they have the alligator game.*”

“Ready for the hunt.”

“Don’t you think it’s a bit cruel to hit their heads?”

“That crane game has a PS4 in it.”

“There’s no way you could win it.”

Familiar sounds and music filled the room. The three wandered aimlessly around the to all the old crane machines until Iwaizumi suddenly called out, “Oh! Let’s play this! Have a showdown!”

In front of the eager Iwaizumi was a punching bag machine. But Matsukawa wrinkled his brow at the effort of it all, “No way, I hate these power type games. You’re going to thrash us anyway Iwaizumi.”

“There’s no winning or losing in punching. It’s to test yourself.”

“You said showdown before.”

It seemed like they were about to break down into another fight but Hanamaki, blue-faced, cut in, “Sorry… but I… the moment I use any force I think I’ll have ramen spewing out of my mouth.”

“Don’t wanna see that.”

“If that’s the case, how about we head home? Since we’re tired.”

It was when the three went to check the time that they saw it.

“Oh.”

Hanamaki pointed to the back of the arcade.

“Damn, air hockey!”

“Huh?”

“Oh, it really is! Air hockey! Air hockey!”

At the back of the arcade was an air hockey machine, old and clunky like the rest of the machines.

“Oh crap! How long has it been since we played air hockey?”

“I haven’t played since junior high!”

“Hurry up, let’s play! How much is it?”

“I won’t lose!”

“Who versus who for the first game?”

Wanting to spew ramen from his mouth, whether someone was going to win or lose, all of that was forgotten as the three hurriedly rushed to stuff one hundred yen into the machine. And thus the first round of the air hockey tournament began.

***

“The bathhouse was unexpectedly interesting.”

“We’ve discovered a great place.”

“Right?”

They had eaten to their heart’s content, played around like children before heading into the baths once again to wash off the sweat. With satisfied faces, they headed home on the free shuttle.

“I didn’t even think it would be this interesting.”

“We spent all our money on the air hockey machine though.”

“We exchanged for so many coins.”

After reminiscing the day using only the words “sick”, “seriously”, and “fun” they eventually quieted down. Whether it was the swaying of the bus, the fatigue from the baths, their full stomachs, or the soft orange light of the setting sun filling the bus that had the three nodding off, no one was sure.

Staring blankly out the window Iwaizumi mumbled, “... If only he had come.”

Upon hearing those words Hanamaki and Matsukawa’s eyes flew open, despite almost falling asleep.

“Huh, by ‘him’ you mean… Him?”

“If you say ‘him’ there’s no one but him.”

“Him… yeah him…”

The three of them exchanged glances nodding in agreement “Him”, “yeah him.” And bursting out into laugher but it only took a moment before they stopped.

“No, it’s better that he wasn’t here.”

“I guess.”

“It would be pretty wild if he were.”

“But he definitely would have stolen the microphone out of the old lady’s hands.”

“Gotta do a duet I guess.”

“And then he’d get a tonne of candy and mikan.”

“Definitely.”

Right in the middle of their heated talk about ‘him’, the phone in Iwaizumi’s pocket rang out.

“Hm?”

Iwaizumi glanced at the notification, letting out an “ugh” and leaning back, the other two asked what it was and Iwaizumi showed them his phone.

“It’s from him.”

It was a message from him – Oikawa Tohru.

“Really?”

“Hell, he might be hiding in here watching us.”

“Surveying us huh.”

Of course, it would have been unlikely, but perhaps it wasn’t with the person called Oikawa. You could say that he was mysterious, or rather incomprehensible, whichever it was he was inexplicably terrifying.

After looking around the windows and the bus to confirm that Oikawa wasn’t there, Hanamaki let out a sigh, “So what did he say?”

“He just asked ‘Whatcha doing?’ Doesn’t he have anything else to do?”

“Tell him we’re in Las Vegas, send ‘In Las Vegas now’.”

“Idiot.”

“That’s stupid.”

While they bantered they took a photo, bathed in the setting sun, and sent it a message along the lines of “Coming back from Las Vegas with Matsukawa and Hanamaki”. And a reply came back immediately, obviously addressed to all three of them.

“Here we go, ‘ Is this Las Vegas at Naruko Hot springs*?’. Why Naruko hot springs? Is it the kokeshi? ” Hanamaki laughed before his expression changed, “Wait how did he know we went to the baths? Is there a place called Las Vegas in Naruko?”

Both Matsukawa and Iwaizumi replied immediately with serious faces, “Of course not.”

“Oh but hot springs sound good too,” Matsukawa added, stretching in his seat.

“Hot springs, huh…That means table tennis and not air hockey.” As Iwaizumi smirked his phone rang again.

“No fair! I want to go!” came another message from Oikawa.

This time Hanamaki replied, “Air hockey warrior Iwaizumi was seriously something.” and a reply from Oikawa came immediately.

“He said, ‘I’d beat him no sweat’. What are you gonna do Iwaizumi?”

“As if I’d lose.” Iwaizumi replied casually, but his fighting spirit burned deep in his eyes.

“This is going to be serious.”

“Yeah.”

Hanamaki and Matsukawa looked at one another.

Would there really be another round of the air hockey tournament? Who knows?

The three of them thought about the days ahead of them on the swaying bus.

For the three years of high school, if not the years of elementary school and middle school, the boys that had spent more time bonding with their volleyball teammates than their parents or siblings, were now about to walk different paths. Away from their schools, their hometown.

“God, I’m getting bus sick,” Matsukawa said blue-faced and Hanamaki laughed.

“You’re so weak… wait I don’t feel so good either.”

“Don’t look down, look outside!” Iwaizumi pointed, putting his phone away in his pocket.

“What are you going to do about Oikawa?” Hanamaki asked, “You still haven’t replied to his ‘I’d beat him no sweat’ comment.”

“Just leave it.”

The other two laughed at the blunt reply.

“Amazing, he’s not even here and he managed to barge in.”

“His presence is too strong.”

“That’s why it’s a good thing he isn’t here with us.”

As they laughed amongst themselves the bus approached the station. They knew it well, this twilight town they always walked through together. The bus winded through, this small journey was almost coming to an end. As each small journey ends, the days slowly pass by. The match ends, retiring from club activities, graduating from high school.

The time to part ways will definitely come, but this won’t be a problem for them. The time spent together, the sweat and tears they shed, all of it is part of their bodies and souls. Along with the things that they built up together, their strength, technique, confidence, and trust, all these things make up their bodies. And each of them will walk a new path to a place they haven’t trekked.

As all roads are connected, although separated, for now, they will surely meet again. And so for the when they meet again so that they can hold their heads high and laugh, they will continue to take on each challenge.

How about you?

Are you moving forward?

A motivation that can only be gained from friends pushes them onwards through fatigue. If friends are what keeps one going when they’re apart, then not having them by their sides will be all right.

“Continue on unwaveringly.”

That’s all they needed.

***

While the three began to head their separate ways home after hopping off the bus, Oikawa was hunched in the corner of the clubroom staring at his phone, “Why did they leave me on read? Damn it!!”

TRANSLATION NOTES:

Electricity baths: Pretty much a bath that has panels running down the sides that shoot electrical pulses into the water. I’ve been in one and it’s kind of tingly at first but it feels kind of like a massage if you get used to it. It’s not all that common in Japan so even then it’s a sort of novelty to Japanese people.

Waterfall feature: I didn’t know how to translate this but it’s basically a pipe at a height where the hot water comes out. You can sit under it to hit your back and it’s basically like a waterfall/massage.

Jinbei: Traditional Japanese top and bottoms. The kind you see babies wear to summer festivals (I guess like a two-piece, yukata top and pants). Made out of a thin material and made particularly for hot weather.

Alligator game: in English, this game is Alligator hunt, but in Japanese, it’s called (ワニワニパニック) waniwani panicky, alligator panic, Matsukawa follows with a “What a panic” to finish Hanamaki’s sentence but I changed it a bit so English readers could get the reference.

Naruko hot springs: One of the most popular hot springs in Miyagi is also known for their wooden dolls, kokeshi. If you ever go to Miyagi, Naruko is beautiful in fall!!

As a small disclaimer: I have taken some liberties in translation to make the novel read smoothly. So please don’t quote specific words as canon. that being said I tried my best to stay faithful to the original. For this reason I will not allow translations into another language using this as the base text. I apologise to anyone who is keen on sharing it in another language but please do so using the original Japanese text.

Anyway, if you enjoyed this chapter please consider supporting Haikyuu and buying a copy of this novel (volume 11) ! I may consider doing more novel translations in the future!

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