#never before has a series been able to get me to drop several essays at th drop of a hat | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

thatmultifandomhoe · 3 years

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BTS - Master List

No word count = under 1k.

💞 = Fluff

🌩 = Angst

💋 = Smut

Updated as of 6-6-2021.

Click here to Return to the Main Master List.

Drabbles:

This is Girl Talk, so Leave 💞

Slice of Life AU

Do you think I’m scared of a woman? 💞

College AU

Slice of Life AU

Short Stories:

A Lifetime under Moonlit Nights 🌩 💞

God AU

Overview: It was a love story that began when Gods roamed the Earth, and lasted over the course of several centuries, always under the beauty of a moonlit sky. When one life cut too short, you realize how tiresome it is to constantly be reborn.

Series:

Dad Jokes and Spilled Coffee 💞

Book 7 in the Mated Love is Never Easy Universe

Hybrid AU

Overview: TBW

Sneak Peak: “I knew I was handsome, but now I’m just hot. And it’s not because of the coffee that you spilled on me either.”

Drabbles:

Please...love me 🌩

Have I mentioned, I fucking hate Halloween 💞

Safety First 🌩

Unrequited Love AU

College AU

Short Stories:

If you can’t sleep...we could have sex? 💞 💋

Slice of Life AU

Overview: You can’t fall asleep. So Yoongi finds an alternative solution to your problem.

A Slice of Forever 💞 🌩

Vampire AU

Poly AU

Featuring Namjoon

Overview: They were just stories. Werewolves, Witches, Gremlins, Vampires...they were all a story that thrived off of Halloween. At least, that’s what you thought. Until you met them.

Series:

Midnight Love Songs 💞 🌩 💋

Book 4 in the Mated Love is Never Easy Universe

Hybrid AU

Overview: TBW

Sneak Peak: “The stars are pretty, but there’s a moon that shines more brightly, and who I love quite dearly.”

Drabbles:

Tied Up 💞 💋

Date Night AU

Short Stories:

Man-Child 🌩

Idol AU

Stop Being So Cute 💞

Coffee Shop AU

Overview: Dating is never easy. So when your best friend sets you up on a blind date, you agree to meet up at a coffee shop. Only problem is, he never shows up, and a certain barista can’t help glancing your way.

Daydreaming About Dandelions 💞

Daycare AU

Overview: For the time that they were in your classroom, they were your kids and nothing meant more to you than them. Being a teacher at a daycare was your life, and to your surprise, the new teacher Mr. Hoseok, was going to be shadowing you for the day.

Hookup on an Airplane 💋💞

Traveling AU

Overview: You were finally achieving your dream of traveling the world, and the the first stop on your list was South Korea. After a stressful morning and with a long day ahead, all you wanted to do was sleep on the plane. But when your seat mate turns out to be cute, and offers to help you take care of a certain problem, well, the flight suddenly becomes more fun than you expected.

Series:

Strawberry Cream and BBQ 💞 💋 🌩

85k in total.

Book 1 in the Mated Love is Never Easy Universe

Hybrid AU

Completed

Overview: Your best friend knows that she can count on your for anything, so when she asks you to watch her hybrid while she’s gone for a study abroad trip, you can’t say no. But when these four months are over, things have changed in a way that no one expected.

Move in Day: A SC&BBQ Drabble 💞 4k

Drabbles:

Does he know about the baby? 💞

Slice of Life AU

Overview: Namjoon accidentally reads a text that wasn’t meant for him.

Short Stories:

My Everything 💞

Slice of Life AU

Overview: You go to a family reunion that only results in disaster with how your family treats you, so you go back home to seek comfort in your boyfriend.

Yellow Gerber Daises 💞

Slice of Life AU

Overview: It’s your birthday, but you’re the one who has a surprise for Namjoon.

Stop interrupting me 🌩

Slice of Life AU

Dear Diary... 💞

Soul Mate AU

College AU

Overview: The last thing Namjoon expected was to wake up in someone else’s bed, let alone with a stranger who he doesn’t remember in the slightest bit.

A Slice of Forever 💞 🌩

Vampire AU

Poly AU

Featuring Yoongi

Overview: They were just stories. Werewolves, Witches, Gremlins, Vampires...they were all a story that thrived off of Halloween. At least, that’s what you thought. Until you met them.

Brotið Hjarta 🌩💞

25k

Fantasy AU

Elf AU

Norse Light Elf Mythology

Overview: When a magical storm threatens to wipe out your home, you venture into the forest in search of someone - anyone - who can help end it. When an Elf takes you in after getting injured, you learn that those who live in the forest are not the monsters your village town has made them out to be, but victims.

Series:

Knitting You a Home 🌩💞💋

Book 2 in the Mated Love is Never Easy Universe

Hybrid AU

In-Progress

Overview: With questions far larger than either of you imagined, you can’t help but wonder if Namjoon’s let his past and old fears to come back and haunt him. You had shown him that it was possible to have a home and to be loved once before, but will you be able to do it again?

Drabbles:

I’m not going to be sympathetic until you see a Doctor 💞

Slice of Life AU

Welcome back. Now fucking help me💞

Slice of Life AU

Short Stories:

Dancing in Europe 💞

Idol AU

Overview: You and Jimin have only recently started dating when he he whisks you of to Europe on his days off, and surprises you with a date to go see a ballet performance.

Mon Amour 💞

College AU

Artist AU

Overview: You were Jimin’s muse. No matter what his materials were, his ideas, he always found you at the center of his latest art piece.

Memories of Old and New 💞

Christmas AU

Established Relationship AU

Slice of Life AU

Overview: It the first Christmas that you’re celebrating with Jimin, but the magical holiday isn’t the same after the unexpected passing of your parents.

Type 2 💞 🌩

10k

Established Relationship AU

Slice of Life AU

Medical Condition

Overview: You were diagnosed with Type 2 diabetes in high school and ever since then, you’re been able to manage it without a problem Sticking to a schedule and monitoring your blood was easy. Then came Jimin, and you suddenly you found yourself hiding it all from him. But when your blood sugar drops dangerously low in the middle of the night, Jimin’s the only one who can help you.

Series:

Snapshots of Our Story 💞

Sleep - Sleepless Nights - Pt 3?

Idol AU

Overview: With a once in a lifetime chance of hanging out with BTS for a week, you and Jimin unexpectedly end up growing feelings for each other. These are the snapshots as the two of you try to make it all work out.

Simply Baby Steps 💞 🌩 💋

Book 3 in the Mated Love is Never Easy Universe

Hybrid AU

Overview: TBW

Sneak Peak: “I don’t care if it’s just the two of us for the rest of our lives. I love you, and we’re going to figure this out, together. That’s what it means to have a Mate; supporting and being there for them when everything is going right, and being there when they’re hurting and loving them nonetheless. Because I’ll always love you, no matter what.”

Drabbles:

Tell me that you need me 💋

Vampire AU

I’m not buying IKEA furniture again 💞

Slice of Life AU

Short Stories:

Otherworldly Lovin’ 💋

Alien AU

Overview: Not only did he crash land into your yard, but he also crashed right into your heart...among other places.

Series:

Knowing You 💞 🌩

Late Night Bus Rides - A Missed Stop

Idol AU

Unrequited Love AU

Completed

Overview: You and Taehyung were best friends, feelings grew, and even when he went off to become an Idol, you thought nothing would ever change your friendship. But then life came knocking.

Running Wild 🌩💞💋

Book 5 in the Mated Love is Never Easy Universe

Hybrid AU

Overview: TBW

Sneak Peak: “I’ve always been told that I was runner. So I ran. From everything that was possible to run away from. With you, for the first time all I want to do is stay.”

Drabbles:

I lost our baby 💞

Slice of Life AU

Overview: Jungkook looses more than a game of hide and seek.

The ladies love a guy who’s good with kids 💞

Overview: Jungkook has an unlikely helper when trying to impress you.

Short Stories:

The Coffee Lounge 💞

College AU

Overview: Jungkook has had a crush on you since the semester started, and when he informs you about an essay that you knew nothing about and is due the next morning, he jumps at the chance to help you out with it. What he doesn’t realize, is that you share the same feelings for him.

Sorry isn’t going to help when I kick your ass! 🌩

Idol AU

Overview: All he wanted to do was surprise you, but when he arrives at your place, Jungkook realizes just how much work has interfered with his relationship with you.

One on One 💞

Boxer AU

College AU

Overview: He was a boxer, and you were a student. Two separate lives and yet, you were the one putting him back together.

Consequences 💞 🌩

College AU

Forbidden Love AU

Overview: You had dated one of his best friends - someone Jungkook considered to be an older brother - and even though were single and he never once stopped loving you, dating was an impossible option. The consequences of dating an ex of the leader? Life threatening.

Series:

Mistaken Identity 🌩 💋 💞

Book 6 in the Mated Love is Never Easy Universe

Hybrid AU

Overview: TBW

Sneak Peak: “I got sick of them calling me something that I’m not, that I pushed myself to prove to them who I really am. But without you, I’m right back where I started. Lost and incomplete.”

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starrybouquet · 3 years

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On Seasons 9 and 10 of Stargate SG1

A note: I wrote a series of essays several weeks ago, when I was feeling particularly crappy. I'm not particularly proud of them--they're pretty dramatic--but they do explain several of my more personal fandom feelings. I know I don't always tend to be the best at explaining things on the spot, so I'm posting these with the hope that I can refer people to them the next time that happens.

Um, I mentioned they're a little dramatic. I'm really, really sorry about that. But hey, if I can't be dramatic on Tumblr, in fandom, where else is that gonna go?

But still - if you're feeling a little sensitive today, maybe you wanna skip this. Or not. Just a light warning. :)

This piece is on seasons 9 and 10 of Stargate SG1, but they aren't all Stargate-related. I'll be posting them in the next few days, hopefully.

To those of you who like s9-10: I have nothing against you. Some of you I know better, some less well. In general, though, I like you, you seem like fine people. This is not about you, I hold nothing against you for liking those seasons. In fact, I envy you. This is more a personal post about why I'm an idiot. If you want, feel free to scroll down past this. I won't be offended. I'd put it under the cut but I'm on mobile.

Okay. Why, hello, those of you willing to read this rant...

No matter how much I denounce and ignore it, I cannot get past the pain of seasons 9 and 10 of Stargate SG-1. I've never watched them in full. Seen a few episodes here and there.

I cannot, repeat, CANNOT stand the thought today. It hurts.

It's an old pain, and it's not just SG1. SG1 is just one of the highlights in a long line of books and shows that have repeatedly broken my heart by being SO GOOD and then taking an, uh, precipitous right turn, shall we say. Because a hard right seems too kind, and a precipitous drop too harsh.

I love SG1. I love love love it. I like the plots and I love the science, but what I really fell in love with was the characters.

I loved all of them. I've said it before, and I'll say it again: if Sam, Daniel, or Teal'c had been on any other show, I guarantee you they would have been my favorite by far. Jack is just so...Jack that he has to be my favorite. That's SG1 for you.

I've never had super close friends. I have good RL friends, don't get me wrong. They're nice people. But we don't have much in common.

That's okay. That's been my experience forever--really nice folks who maybe didn't always get me or have anything to say to me, but were good, decent people.

And this is good. Really, it is. It's just that SG-1, for me, has always represented the promise that there *are* people out there that are your true friends, and you will do brave and brilliant things with them. It will happen.

It's naive, I know. But I haven't been able to let it go. Maybe someday. But not right now.

Which brings me to s9-10 of SG1. It hurts.

It hurts that SG1 scattered to the wind.

It hurts that they sent Jack away from a place where he was happy, where he'd found friends and meaning in life again, away to fucking DC. To be...what? A politician? I could write a whole post just about this. Actually, I have. I could still write more posts about it!

It hurts that Sam went to Area 51, and nobody seemed to mind, the 'Gate didn't spontaneously combust as we were always led to believe it would.

It hurts that Daniel's personality supposedly changed that much, in the absence of his friends. Though some of his lines are funny, they aren't the earnest, idealistic, thoughtful Daniel I fell in love with. I get the idea that new-look Daniel would roll his eyes at s3-8 Daniel, and beat up floppy hair Daniel. And floppy hair Daniel is my baby and anyone who doesn't appreciate his brilliance can face my wrath. That includes you, buff s9-10 Daniel, and also whoever decided/approved that change in characterization.

Really, the only one who doesn't hurt is Teal'c. Because it feels like he's moving forward, toward happiness.

So...here we are. Season 9. Mitchell, Landry.

I often say I hate Mitchell. Do I resent him for replacing Jack? Yes. I do. We can talk about plot reasons and all that, but at the end of the day, I was going to hate anyone who tried to be Jack.

This is true in real life, too. You can't try to be anyone else. You've gotta walk your own path.

Now, people say that I didn't give Mitchell a chance. I say that the way he was portrayed, in the few episodes I've seen, tells me enough.

I can think of lots of ways Mitchell could have been interesting. How would Daniel and Teal'c react to an old, actually bad tempered (not Jack bad tempered, actually bad tempered) hardass after eight years of their best friends leading them? Or--start with his actual character. Mitchell, he hasn't been at the SGC. Wouldn't he get some flack from the longtime team leaders of SGs 2-5ish? They'd be insulted, right?

Or we could've gotten a nice Daniel Teal'c episode arc and then we could've had one Samantha Carter as team leader, though we won't get into that.

Bringing me to my next point. Co-leads?? Seriously?? You're trying too hard, folks. Telling me Sam used to know Mitchell does not actually make me like him.

Same thing with Landry. Unlike Mitchell, I guess I don't really have an opinion on Landry. He's just....there? No character development for this man.

Anyway, back to the team.

One of the things I love about SG1 is how the humor and friendship was so damn natural. Other than a few episodes (Urgo comes to mind), the plots weren't intentionally humorous. They were campy sci-fi plots sometimes, sure. They were funny because Jack was funny, yeah. They were lower budget than some other sci-fi. But they were as serious as sci-fi gets. It was how the characters reacted that made it funny.

Similarly, we were never told SG1 were found family. We just Knew. Because of the way they acted with each other. Because of the way Jack would "order" them to do things.

And hey, by the way, they weren't always family. Sam used to be less willing to ignore Jack. Daniel used to be less willing to trust Teal'c. Jack used to be a little more stern.

So...they meshed together. Like all found families do.

Every time I see a photo of new-look SG1 in seasons 9 and 10, I can't help but feel that they're trying too hard. I don't get the family feel because they aren't a family, damn it. It doesn't matter how many times you *tell* me they're super close. One of the reasons the original team got so close is because they all needed each other. Jack was depressed, Daniel was grieving, Sam was alone and had lost her mom and wasn't speaking with her dad and had never opened up to anyone in her life, Teal'c was an alien fighting for freedom after spending 100 years essentially as a slave.

And partly because of that, by season 9? Daniel and Teal'c (and Sam, when she comes back) don't need a family the way they used to. They have each other. They have Jack, or at least they *should*. *Glares in angry at Jack in DC vibes*

So...they simply don't have the relationship with Mitchell they do with each other.

It'd be different if Mitchell needed a family. It's not that SG1 hasn't added people before--I think Jonas is a perfect example of this. He wasn't Daniel, and that always hurt. But he was young, and naive, and innocent, and he needed SG1 because he'd left everything he'd ever known.

And that worked.

Without needing family, Mitchell is just a coworker. He can be a friendly coworker. A friend. But if he wanted to become better friends, family, he needed to show depth and vulnerability. He needed to need SG1.

And he never does, from what I've seen and heard about and read about. Or if he does need SG1, he doesn't need them badly enough to show more than an occasional bout of thoughtfulness before returning to his normal pale-Jack-imitation ways.

Now, I don't know why that is. I lean toward bad writing. I haven't watched Farscape (it's on my to watch list) but it seems like Ben Browder is a fine actor.

So, seasons 9 and 10 are probably fine TV. I'm never going to watch them through, so don't ask. I've tried and failed and every time it just tears my heart a little more and I'm won't be doing it again.

Those seasons...they just lost everything I watch SG-1 for, and so...yeah. I feel the hate strongly. Not because they're bad--I think they're different, not necessarily bad. My hate is only because in creating those seasons, they tore down the parts of SG1 that I loved most.

So s9-10 show me a few nice hugs and laughs? That's nice. I like comedies, I do. However...that's not my Stargate. Not the one I love. I liked the sarcastic one, the one full of wonder, the one where they had to scrape and claw their way through the galaxy with naivety and courage and brilliance. The one where they ate together, fought together, died together, were resurrected together.

It hurts, man. It hurts when the things I love turn into something that's lukewarm. It leaves a bad taste in my mouth.

That's why we have fanfic. And, with any luck, I'll actually start that AU I've been talking about.

It's fanfic, and so it'll be my Stargate. The ending I wanted--which really wasn't an ending at all, more of a closure of one chapter of the story.

Damn, did that turn dramatic. Um, sorry about that, and also sorry for spilling my feelings all over you guys. Thanks for reading, if you got to the end of this.

#sg1 #stargate sg1 #fandom #sg1 meta #overdramatic fandom essays #my blogstuffs

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jazy3 · 3 years

Text

Thoughts on Grey’s Anatomy: 17X4

SPOILERS AHEAD!!!

This week we finally got the answer to the question that was on everyone’s minds: Who’s on the beach?!?!? And the answer was none other than George O’Malley! I was right! Ha! I love it when that happens. Yes George was on the beach and we got to see him have a lovely heart to heart with Meredith about life and death, how things were for her and the others after he died, and what life is like for her now.

I was surprised that the heart to heart meaningful conversation turned out to be between Meredith and George and not Meredith and Derek, but I feel like that is coming later. I think the meaningful conversation with Derek will happen right at the end of Meredith’s beach adventure just before she recovers and comes back to the land of the living.

I like that they addressed why Derek and George look older than they did the last time we saw them by having George say that maybe they look older to Meredith and by virtue the audience because that’s how she likes to think of and picture them. The sand isn’t real, the water isn’t real, and Meredith’s perceptions of them and their physical appearances aren’t real either.

We see Richard and Bailey join Meredith and George on the beach at the end sequence when the real life Richard and Bailey move closer to Meredith’s bedside and talk to her which establishes that the beach is neither here nor there. It’s not the afterlife, but it is. It’s not heaven or hell, but it can be. It’s all happening in Meredith’s head, but it’s not. It’s a dream, but it’s also reality.

I liked the call backs to how Meredith, Alex, Cristina, and Izzie laughed a George’s funeral at the ridiculousness of it all. We also got some introspection from Meredith when George asks if she still dances it out like she used to and she says no and that she hasn’t really since she lost Cristina. George gently reminds her that Cristina isn’t dead like him.

She’s still very much alive she just lives someplace else and that she shouldn’t give up on something she loves that makes her happy because Cristina lives in Zurich, Switzerland instead of Seattle, U.S.A. But we also get some insight here that to Meredith, Cristina moving an ocean away felt like a death and still does. She hasn’t danced it out like that since she left because she’s mourning that loss and to her not being able to see Cristina whenever she wants to is akin to not being able to see people like Derek, George, and Lexie like she used to because they’re gone.

Alex’s departure is different in that way in that once the pandemic is over and travel has opened back up and she’s done being mad at him she can go see Alex and Izzie and the kids whenever she wants. She doesn’t even have to get on a plane if she doesn’t want to. She can drive or take the train. The same holds true for Callie and Arizona. But the loss of people like Cristina, Derek, George, Mark, and Lexie is different because she can’t. Getting to Cristina means enduring at least two separate several hour flights across an ocean and she hates flying.

Seeing all of those other people is impossible because they’re not alive anymore. And she feels that loss everyday whether she’s able to verbalize it or not. I loved Meredith’s ending line about finding your people and holding them close because those are the ones that get you through the tough times. The fact that she made Richard her POA comes full circle in this episode when we see him trying to comfort her and make a decision at her bedside.

Richard is struggling about whether to enroll Meredith in the trial when he realizes she’s trying to say something. He gets closer and tells her he’s here for her only to realize she’s mumbling in her sleep and talking to George. Because Richard has seen Meredith and the others through it all he knows exactly who George is. He knows what the significance of that is and he realizes that she’s not trying to speak to him or get better. She’s talking to her friend George on the other side. She’s dying and if he doesn't do something soon she’ll join him. This realization causes him to decide to enroll Meredith in the trial.

I like that we also got an update on George’s Mom who we last saw in Season 8 talking to Callie about her marriage to Arizona and the birth of her daughter Sofia. George tells Meredith that grief is different for everyone and that his mother carries hers and that makes him sad and that sometimes he tries to shake it out of her and try to let her know that he’s still there and he’s still him even though she can’t see him anymore.

I loved how Meredith commented that he’s basically haunting her and George replied, “Well sure if you want to call it that.” The gentle teasing nature they had between them as friends was one of the things I loved most about their relationship and it was nice to see that here. I also liked their conversation about choices. Meredith asks if it’s her choice whether she stays or goes, and George says that it depends. Some people get to choose, and some don’t. He would have stayed if he could, but she appears to have a choice. On the one hand she’s worried about the kids and how losing her and becoming orphans will affect them.

On the other hand, she’s tired and has been through a lot and all the people she loves are on that beach. So, it’s a tough call for her to make. When they were sitting there on that beach and George turned to Meredith and said, “If you stay here you might break him,” and they turned to reveal Richard sitting next to her? Ugh that got me! Also watching Meredith shake convulsively from COVID while unconscious and talking to her dead friend was unnerving and a little scary especially since this is a real disease that is hurting real people. My heart breaks for anyone going through this in real life.

I also loved their exchange about the kids. Where he tells them how great they are and she says he never got to meet them and he tells her that he checks in on her and them from time to time. I also love that his comment establishes that all of the other people Meredith has lost are able to check in on her and the kids and that the other people that other characters have lost can do the same. It’s a nice image and something I think all of us in the real world like to imagine and believe when we lose a loved one. That they’re watching over us.

I loved how in Meredith’s Voice Over this episode she says that Medical schools often ask applicants for an essay describing a time they faced adversity and how they overcame it because they want to know how people will cope with the challenges they'll face as a doctor. And that some students worry they have nothing to write about because they haven't faced difficulty. She didn't have that problem. LOL!

Meredith is the main character, the lead star, and the anchor of the series and they introduced this plot in the premiere this season which mostly likely means that she won’t die or be sidelined by this permanently. And since the show is reflecting a real world disease and pandemic that means that if Meredith lives one of the other characters or someone else close to them will be dying from it most likely. Sadly, it looks like that might be Tom after this episode.

Tom’s got some funny dialogue when he tries to interrupt the staff meeting Richard is holding about COVID by tablet and with Helm when she comes by to drop off his COVID test. I liked how Jackson just walked over and knocked over the tablet to shut him up and everyone just laughed and carried on. His scenes with Helm were pretty funny too. The Zombie appearing on screen scared me though!

In the end we see that Teddy finally comes to talk to him and bring him soup after Helm tells her how bad he’s doing and how much he needs a friend as she desperately tries to save Meredith. When Tom didn’t answer the door or make a sound my first thought was that he had collapsed, but no it’s worse than that because as Teddy turns to leave the camera pans over and we see Tom cold and shaking in a blanket on the other side of the door unable to respond.

Which means his condition has worsened and he’s in pain, but he can’t communicate that to Teddy because he’s too weak to speak or he can’t make his voice loud enough to be heard over the pouring rain. Man that was some downpour! I wonder if it was fake rain that they created or if it rained that heavily the day they filmed that scene. Good to see Tom finally bought a house though! Seeing as last we saw he was living out of a hotel and then got Teddy a beautiful apartment only to find out at the last minute that she had gotten back together with Owen so he went back to living in a hotel again. Glad to see he got some digs.

I’ll be sad if they write Tom off as a character as I’ve really come to like him and he’s interesting and complex. Plus, I love seeing someone call Owen on his crap with such humour! We also got some good social commentary on how health practitioners often base treatment protocols and assessments on the standards of care and presentation developed for white patients, but that because diseases present differently in people of different races and genders that needs to be accounted for.

Especially because your race, gender, and where you grew up affects your predisposition for certain illnesses and can affect the presentation. Owen failed to catch something serious with his patient when they were initially brought in because he was using the standard developed for white patients which is different from the standard for Asian patients.

One of the new interns who is Asian brings this up to Nico who eventually says something to Owen who brings it up to Bailey who calls him on his privilege and reminds him that he needs to not only check himself, but because he is white and is the head of Trauma for the hospital it is his responsibility to update and improve protocols to make sure that every patient is getting the best care possible.

As Bailey says true equality means taking into account that we are all different. And when it comes to medicine conditions present themselves in different ways based on race and other factors. Giving everyone the exact same care based on a standard of care developed by and for white people is not equality because it means that people of colour like his patient receive a lower standard of care which can lead to unnecessary suffering and death.

True equality means providing equitable care that takes into account who a patient is physically when treating them. As Bailey says equitable care is not the same as equal care. One takes into account the reality and ensures true equal treatment while the other gives the appearance of equality while disadvantaging anyone who’s not a white straight cisgender man. While I like that they addressed that Nico was a complete jerk to everyone this episode.

He acted like the whole thing was no big deal when the intern brought it up and brushed off her comments about Anti-Asian racism from earlier in the episode that we’re totally valid. The intern was looking for some solidarity and for someone above her to back her up on some real issues. Instead Nico blew her off and talked down to her only to bring the issue up himself to Owen in the exact way he told her not to. Nico’s a good surgeon and he was right to say something, but he is a horrible human being, teacher, and boyfriend.

He continues to treat Levi horribly for no reason and as Jo says Levi deserves better. I liked Jo and Levi’s interactions this episode. They were funny and I love them! Also did anyone else think it was weird that Jo and Levi were having a conversation about how horrible Nico is as a person and how horribly he treats Levi when Nico was literally a metre or two in front of them and could hear everything they were saying? Nico’s an ass and apparently, he doesn't care that he’s an ass and that everyone thinks that of him.

I’m actually liking the whole Jo and Jackson friends with benefits situation. So far, its made for some good comic relief! I like too that we finally saw Jackson admit that he’s jumped from one relationship to another way too fast for his whole run on the show and that he needs to take some time and get some therapy and figure out what he wants. I love that Jo was immediately on the same page and laughed at the idea of them having a relationship right now. She needs a sex buddy, not a partner. He’s got work to do on himself and as she says she feels broken and is still trying to heal from the trauma she has experienced.

I also liked the scenes with Amelia and Link. I like that Amelia was able to express herself and her frustrations and that Link made the decision to support her. My best friend that I watch with made comment that she felt like under the same circumstances Owen would have just stormed back into the house whereas Link angrily moved some toys aside so that he could sit next to Amelia while she felt all her feelings and talked about them because that’s what she needed to do.

I also liked that when Amelia tried to push Link to talk later on he opened up about his process and was straight with her. Talking about all of her feelings out loud and in the open because if she bottles them up, she’ll wind up relapsing is her thing. Link’s thing is to focus on the positive and play his guitar. As Link says he’s happy to support her on her thing, but if she wants their relationship to work she has to support him on his thing. And she does.

My favourite line this episode? “What are you playing?” “It’s a song called ‘If The Virus Doesn’t End Us, Then Climate Change Probably Will.’” Too funny! And accurate! We also learn that Amelia loves to garden and is apparently quite good at it and they appear to have a herb and vegetable garden at Meredith’s house. We get some awkward dinner interaction courtesy of Maggie and Winston’s relationship this episode when he invites her to a virtual Birthday dinner for his beloved Grandmother which is then crashed by his estranged father.

His Grandmother invited him and within five seconds of being on the call he insults Winston and says that the idea that his son who is a Cardiothoracic Surgeon at Tufts is a genius is laughable because apparently he failed sixth grade. This man is an asshole and I can see why Winston hates him. That being said Winston exiting the call and leaving Maggie hanging there with his Grandmother, father, and some other relatives that she’s never met was not okay.

It was extremely rude. He should have told Maggie he had to go before signing off or said that they should both leave the call. Maggie is a class act for staying on that call and asking his upset Grandmother if there was cake. Side note: I did love Maggie and Winston’s conversation about what pencil nerds they both are! This is a match made in heaven so whatever issues they do have they’ll work through them because this is clearly meant to be.

My only real complaint about this episode was the absence of one Cormac Hayes. As my best friend said after we finished watching, “Did you notice who wasn’t in this episode? McWidow. Where the hell was McWidow?” I concur with this sentiment 100%. Hayes makes everything better and I’m sad when he’s not there. I get that Meredith was on the beach with George this episode and that was the focus on her storyline, but it would have been nice to see Hayes stand outside her window or sit next to her or talk to Jo about her condition.

That’s the other thing. Season 16 established that Jo and Hayes are friends and that she’s rooting for him and Meredith to be together and live happily ever after. So I’m surprised that they haven’t had a scene yet this season. We’ve seen Jo interact with Link who she’s close friends with and Levi who’s her roommate, but not Hayes. I’m hoping we’ll get that next episode. So far the majority of Hayes’ scenes have been with Meredith, followed by Jo, followed by Bailey.

If Hayes can’t interact with Meredith like he normally would because she’s unconscious I want to see him interact with Jo, Bailey, Maggie, and Richard more. The fact that we’re seeing intimate scenes with Jo and Jackson gives me hope that we’ll get to see those kinds of scenes for Meredith and Hayes. Although it’s entirely possible that those scenes were filmed last season before the pandemic hit so maybe not.

I also like that we got some important timeline information this episode. Jo mentions murder hornets (remember those?) which puts this episode at the beginning of May. She also says that her and Alex divorced the same year they got married which means that Seasons 14 and 15 span the same year. Which makes sense given the other information that we have and means that the relationship we saw in Season 15 only lasted a matter of months.

Which is good news in the sense that nobody really liked any of the ships from that season apart from Tom and Teddy and Amelia and Link and this establishes that all of those relationships were short lived and occurred over a matter of months, not a full year or more. Based on what I caught of next week’s promo it looks like Meredith’s condition is improving (!) while Tom’s condition is deteriorating, and Bailey’s Mom is in bad shape and is being admitted! COVID is no joke! Buckle up everyone!

Until next time!

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montosmadman · 3 years

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I was tagged by @soy-celeste ages ago. This was hard but also super rewarding because I really got to take a deep dive in the murky depths of my own music library. Thanks for thinking of me, Cata💕

Task: choose TEN SONGS that describe your personal aesthetic / how you see yourself. Bonus points if you write a little explanation for each song, that‘s not a must though.

List under a read more because it turned out really long and includes some very personal and possibly triggering mental health stuff.

I'm tagging @capitanogiorgio @hendos @furiousflamewolf @checoswin and @diegoalvesisgod

1. Nakashima Mika - 僕が死のうと思ったのは

The title loosely translates to "The reason I thought I'd die" or "The time I thought I'd die". Yes, I went there right off the bat.

Let's get something straight: I'm not suicidal. I have never been actively suicidal, despite struggling with depression and anxiety most of my teenage/adult life. However, what this song captures for me is the feeling when you're not actively thinking about killing yourself, but you do have this empty feeling when you think there's no point for you being alive. And that's something I'm very familiar with.

There are a couple lines I wanna highlight, even though the whole song hits me very hard whenever I listen to it:

その木漏れ日でうたた寝したら、虫の死骸と土になれるかな

If I lie down beneath the sunlight streaming through the trees, will I become like the dirt and insect remains?

あなたのような人が生きてる世界に少し期待するよ

If people like you are living in this world, then maybe it’s alright to hope a little too.

The first line does what I talked about to above: it's the feeling when you just lie down and wonder if anything would change if you just disappeared. The second line -- last one of the song -- has more hope. It's when you find a reason to believe in the future and realize there is still a reason to live. Personally, I'm trying to hang very hard on that last thought even when the world seems to be against me.

(Full translation in a pinned comment under the Youtube video)

2. The Ark - Little Dysfunk You

No essay here. I just needed to have The Ark on the list because they're the official soundtrack of my life, the first band whose album I bought myself, and who taught me it was okay not to fit in. I even have a tattoo that says "a little dysfunk" because my best friend and I have been relating to this song long before either one of us realized we weren't neurotypical. It's the very dysfunctional ode to our friendship, and I love it.

3. Elton John - Rocket Man

I feel like this might be a universal experience growing up neurodiverse and/or an outsider. You spend years feeling like you're alone in space, on another planet, and you want to connect with people but at the same time know that once you come back, you still won't be the person others want or expect you to be. The challenge is to accept that and realize it's okay and you don't need to change yourself for others. And it really is hard when you're raised in a society where the odds are stacked against you.

4. Sanni - Jos mä oon oikee

Look, I'm giving you something in Finnish too!

Sanni is one of the Finnish artists whose breakthrough I originally missed because I was living abroad. I only properly discovered her a couple years after moving back, when I was driving a lot for my work and hence listening to the radio much more than I used to. Her songs just kept standing out from the rest: her lyrics had this amazing depth even when she was singing about mundane stuff -- like, she was finding these painful truths I hadn't ever spoken but felt very clearly.

That said, I had to choose the one song that's actually very upfront with this idea of being an outsider and not feeling like a part of this world. The title translates to "If I am real" and that pretty much sums it up. It's a song about feeling lonely in the middle of a crowded room, feeling like no one sees you or cares what you do. I personally have this habit of taking a step back and observing people rather than getting involved -- and even when I do, it rarely feels like it's really me out there, because I'm so used to masking and acting like everyone else just to fit in, you know?

I'll finish this off with my favourite verse, translated by yours truly. The last line especially hits home super hard no matter how many times I hear it.

Rautatieasema maanantaina ruuhkaisa Kaikilla tuntuu olevan kiire ja suunta Mä oon ulkopuolella vaik seison sisällä Jos oon jo kotona miten voi olla koti-ikävä

The railway station on Monday is crowded Everyone seems to be in a rush and have a direction I'm outside even though I'm standing inside How can I feel homesick when I'm already home

5. Shobha - Last Exit To Freedom

Full disclosure: Degrassi has been one of my comfort series for many, many years. When this song was first introduced in Next Class, it hit me really hard because it was woven into this whole storyline about depression and suicide, which at the time spoke to me a lot. I repeat, I have never been suicidal, but I do get the headspace that could drive people into it.

However, listening to it again now, it's mostly the message of hope that shines through to me. It's a song that can take two very different readings depending on what your own baggage is. And the series actually acknowledges that later on, which I think is not only beautiful but also extremely important.

There's empty places in my life and I need to breathe There's empty spaces on the map waiting there for me

I've never felt more free than when I actually drop my responsibilities and just go where I want to go. I need that space to breathe, and that's why it has always been such a relief when I could just pack up and start over in a new place. Some might call it running away from my troubles -- and they wouldn't be completely wrong -- but that doesn't change the fact that I've always valued my own freedom above any arbitrary societal norms.

6. Scandinavian Music Group - Näin minä vihellän matkallani

SMG is another one of those bands I grew up on and have seen live several times, so they needed to be here. This song is more on the "aesthetic" end of scale than how I see myself. In fact, I've many times hoped I could be like the narrator of this song. I'll give you a couple of verses to explain:

Kun minulta viedään kaikki Autan kantamaan Ja kun lopulta kaadun Teen sen näyttävästi

When everything's taken from me I'll help them carry it And when I finally fall I'll do it with a flair

Minä vihellän matkallani Näin minä vihellän matkallani Jos sen on oltava niin Olkoon sitten niin

I'm whistling on my journey See how I'm whistling on my journey If this is how things have to be Then so be it

It's this carefree attitude. Laughing in the face of hardship and controversy. There's another amazing line about getting back to the saddle after you fall and swearing you'd do it all over again. I've never been able to do that, because I carry all my old failures and pains so close to the surface, and could never just shake them off with a shrug, no matter how minor.

But on another level, I keep hearing from people who I thought knew me that I don't seem depressed. And who can blame them: on the outside, it probably looks like I bounce back from hardships really fast, because I'm so used to masking my issues that the moment I'm physically capable of doing it, I will. So you might say this song is a picture of my outer self, though it hardly mirrors what's really going on.

7. Queen - Don't Stop Me Now

I'm a firm believer that if my life was a teen movie, this is the song I'd have playing in the final scene where I'd just go "fuck that" and started dancing with @mirkwoodstock in the middle of the parking lot of something. It's my ultimate party anthem, the one that always has me dancing and singing along no matter where I am.

Back when we were at the university, Nanna and I used to go to this rock'n'roll club in town and they'd always play Don't Stop Me Now close to the end of the night, and it really became our song. Like, no matter how shitty I felt, when it came on, I'd be there, and so would she. And that's why it also deserves to be on the list.

8. Blind Channel - Died Enough For You

Throwing a rare newer song into the mix. The moment I heard this song, I knew I'd be listening to it a lot. There's also an acoustic version if you're not a fan of the genre or if you just wanna have a different perspective. Blind Channel is also representing Finland in Eurovision next week, and I'm living for it.

Advertising aside, Died Enough For You takes me to some really dark times in my life. I've been in relationships, both romantic and not, where I've been carrying the other person and giving so much of myself, risking my own mental health (which was not that good to begin with) and not getting much in return. There comes a point where you have to prioritize yourself and admit that dragging yourself into the same abyss is not going help anyone. Unfortunately, usually it takes more strength to admit that and leave than to stay in the relationship that's hurting you.

I'm still talking to some of these people, but I've learned to give myself a permission to sign off when I notice that by helping them I'm only hurting myself more. Someone else's wellbeing cannot be my responsibility when I'm struggling to keep myself afloat. And I truly hope everyone who is supporting me also knows that.

9. Aqua Timez - 真夜中のオーケストラ

Title translates to "Midnight Orchestra". Yes, it's from Naruto. I discovered it back when I was still more involved in anime fandom stuff, and fell for it again year ago when I binged the anime when to lockdowns started, because I needed an escape.

And what an escape it was. Have you ever heard a song and immediately went "I need a tattoo of this", or is that just me? I'm probably not going to get a tattoo because I don't trust non-Japanese artists to get the kanjis right, but the song still captures something very real about loneliness that's not really visible but still very much there. Like, the moment when you meet a person you can truly relate to and for the first time realize you'd been feeling lonely all that time. That's what this song describes to me.

Below are a few verses towards the end of the song. I've bolded the one that first caught my attention (and which I still have as the title of my Japan sideblog).

真夜中の詩が叫んだ「僕ほんとうは独りが　嫌いだ　大嫌いだ」独りぼっちで　生きてゆけてしまうなんてこと

The song of midnight cried out "I truly hate being alone more than anything" I hate to go on living completely alone…

幸せなんて　小さなスプーンで掬えるくらいで充分なんだ分け合える人がいるか　いないかだけ

All I need is being able to scoop happiness with a tiny spoon so long as I have someone to share it with

(Full translation)

真夜中の詩は叫ぶよ「僕ほんとうは　僕ほんとうは　淋しかった」太陽の眩しさに　かき消されても

The song of midnight cried out "I was truly, truly… lonely" Even if I were to be erased by the sun's radiance

10. Jenni Vartiainen (Apulanta) - Mato

This song, named "Worm", was originally released by Finnish rock band Apulanta in 1997. The lyrics, while they might make sense as individual statements, are basically gibberish when you combine them into one piece and try to understand the meaning. There is none. Anyways, the version I chose is a remake by another artist, first performed on the Finnish version of The Best Singers format. It doesn't make any more sense, I just like it better because Jenni is hot and she made it so much fun.

And the reason it's on this list? Welcome to my brain, folks! Sometimes, especially when I'm overwhelmed by lots of external stimuli, my mind tends to just wander wherever the hell it pleases and make connections even I don't get. It also likes to forget the stuff I said just a second a go, so I can switch subjects on the go without even noticing. It's very soothing to have music that doesn't require me to make those connections when that happens.

And now, I shall close this massive post with the first verse of this masterpiece:

Minä tahdon ulos, tahdon ulos kattilasta Minä tahdon pelastaa vielä sinutkin kiehumasta Minä tahdon lentää ulos vessan ikkunasta Minä tahdon tietää kaiken teidän karkkimaasta

I want out, I want out of this kettle I also want to save you from boiling I want to fly out of the toilet window I want to know everything about your candy land

Stay safe and take care of yourselves my dears💕

#tag meme #long post #music #neurodiversity #mental health #tw suicide #tw depression #tw mental health #tw toxic relationship

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sildarmillionsays · 3 years

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One True Ace Pairing: The MCU

The Marvel Cinematic Universe, because of its nature of a shared universe, has a unique opportunity to feature a large number of strong platonic relationships. Superhero movies that came before the MCU didn’t have the space to develop these kinds of relationships, so they focused more on the romantic relationships and the hero-villain relationships.

The MCU, refreshingly, is able to spend as much time on the platonic relationships as they can on the romantic ones; and arguably the platonic pairings are more popular than the romantic ones. In fact, they can be more interesting than the romantic ones because these relationships can exist in a complex web, which is not possible for romantic relationships without getting uncomfortable.

I could delve into each relationship and each would require their own essay, but there is a channel called Implicitly Pretentious that already does that, so I will refer you there (and here is a link to the Marvel/DC playlist.)

In this piece I want to focus on the Clint/Natasha relationship, which is quite appropriate for my One True Ace Pairing series.

While we had already met Natasha (and briefly seen Clint) in previous MCU movies, their relationship was established in the first crossover film. The way it’s presented to us is, in my opinion, a tad over the top. Natasha is on a job (a drug bust?) in which the bad guys have her tied up when she gets interrupted by a call that tells her Clint is compromised. She immediately drops everything and goes to his aid. This scene serves 2 purposes: (1) to tell us she was a badass and was in control the whole time (but we already knew that from Iron Man 2) and (2) to spark interest in the Clint-Natasha relationship.

Of course, just because two characters of opposite genders have a strong bond doesn’t mean it has to be a romantic relationship. In fact Natasha shares a strong platonic bond with several of her male colleagues including Tony Stark, Steve Rogers, and Nick Fury. But part of me thinks that Joss Whedon did an intentional bait-and-switch with such an intentional over-the-top introduction to this relationship. It indicated that Clint was literally the most important thing in her life, period.

Again, just because someone is so darn important to you doesn’t mean your relationship has to be romantic. I just think it’s sad when the most important person ceases to be a major part of your life.

As far as The Avengers goes, it seems like Clint and Natasha are a huge part of each other’s lives. They work together, in fact they work very well together in a team, they are loyal and devoted to each other, and they care about each other a great deal. As much is clear when we see Nat rescue him from his mind control and later comfort him about it.

It is rare that we see two characters share such a strong bond and it’s not too stereotypical to hope two such characters will spend their lives together. So I can’t pretend that I was disappointed when I realized Clint had a secret family this whole time. On the positive side, Nat was not only aware of it, but also quite close with the family. We don’t know the details of their relationship. Perhaps Clint was already married when he met Nat. Or perhaps they didn’t get together because Clint was a family man and Nat couldn’t have kids.

I think Joss Whedon might have been going for the second explanation, although I personally prefer the first. Clint seems to have a loving relationship with his wife. When his paths crossed with Nat’s, it makes sense that he never let it take a romantic tone. After The Avengers, I remember Tumblr being abuzz wanting to know what happened in Budapest. We probably will never get to see that on screen. All we know is that he showed faith in her, brought her over to his side, and gave her a chance to "wipe the red off her ledger". But we did see a version of this in Avengers: Age of Ultron, when he essentially does the same thing for Wanda. That’s just the kind of guy Clint is. And in later films, we see that Wanda also has strong loyalty towards him.

But Clint and Natasha do go their own ways when he retires to be with his family and she goes to train the Avengers. Under the Russo brothers’ direction, their relationship takes on a very sibling-like vibe, which is a lot more comfortable for me as the viewer. Their relationship continues to be strong. They remain loyal to each other when they end up on the opposing sides in Civil War. And they come back together only when he loses his family in the Snap. He goes crazy and becomes a vigilante.

Natasha tries to rehabilitate him and this was one of the more touching developments in their relationship because she tries to do for him now what he did for her back in Budapest – a chance to wipe the red off his ledger. Clint and Natasha seem like a strange choice to send to retrieve the Soul Stone because they have no connection with it whatsoever, but they are the only pair who can possibly sacrifice someone they love in order to retrieve the stone. They fight each other to be the one sacrificed, but it is not only out of love for each other: it’s because they both want redemption for their past sins and now they have that opportunity.

In the end it is Natasha who wins and it makes sense to me as a narrative choice. In Avengers: Age of Ultron we learned that she feels like she can never be whole due to her sterilization and she fills the void of a family from her colleagues. But Clint does have the chance to go back to his family who love him and need him very much. A second chance with his family would be his shot at redemption. So she gets hers through her sacrifice.

I personally enjoyed their relationship arc. I was intrigued right away by the way Joss Whedon introduced it and then disappointed by the way in which he tried to complicate it (as he does). But the Russo Brothers took this relationship in a way that really resonated with me. In fact, I think the Russo Brothers did a great job with all of the relationships in the MCU and dealt with all the arcs so well that I feel satisfied enough that I’m not even particularly looking forward to whatever lies beyond Phase 3. But I think the Clint-Natasha arc is done because I guess she’s dead for now, and he will follow a new arc. But it was one of my favorite pairs in the MCU thus far.

Crossposted to WordPress

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kuroopaisen · 3 years

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@kacchand (i couldn't tag your main but i wanted to make sure you saw this fdlkjfdlkj)

hello dear! i’m sorry it took me so long to respond to this dflskjfdlkfdj i decided to answer your ask in a text post so i can link my thoughts to yours more easily! also, i know i'm going to Ramble, so i wanted to be able to keep it under a cut sdlkfjd

Hi rowan!! I've just finished the final chapter of aot and I just wanted to ask your opinion on it!

(SPOILERS THAT DEPICT MY UNDERSTANDING OF THE STORY'S MEANING AHEAD. READ ONLY IF YOU'VE FINISHED THE CHAPTER)

(FR )

(THERE'S STILL TIME TO BACK OUT)

(DO IT NOW. SPOILER ALERT)

I'd also like to ask a follow up question about it, because it seems that I've come to a different concl. from many of my friends and I'm feeling dumb abt how i feel w it.

first of all (and i say this as sincerely as possible, and if i'm coming off as condesending please let me know hh), please don't feel dumb because you've come to a different conclusion :(

we all read media at different levels (i’ve been told it’s ‘not that deep’ before fdljkfsdlkj) and identify different aspects in it, so the fact that you've had a different experience to some of your friends is absolutely not a reflection on your intelligence. and if anyone's making you feel that way, drop their @. i just want to talk :) furthermore, you’re not wrong for responding to something emotionally, especially if it really... makes you uncomfortable, you know?

i'm from the PH & I've put off determining whether i'm comfy w the manga til the last chap,,,, but is it wrong that I can't shake the feeling that it's a justification of japanese expansionism and genocide? ik this manga has always been in the grey area, and that's what I love abt it! It often shows that no choice they make is absolutely good or bad, and does such a good job at showing you how each complex character came to that understanding (role of environment, etc...) but this last chapter felt too positive abt the rumbling? Like it was justified because paradis was able to advance and there wasn't much choice? idk.

that's totally valid! some of the best think pieces on the show i read mentioned that the concern with the narrative is less "is isayama a nazi sympathiser?" (he most likely isn't), but if he's a imperial japan apologist. and...

well, let's just say that my father is british, and when i was trying to say that colonisation was bad, using british india as an example, he said "well, we gave them railroads." it's... it's uncomfortable and gross and i think it encapsulates how countries with imperial pasts tend to talk about them; even if they don't officially endorse it, there's often a lot of talk about how "well colonialism was good for this country, actually--"

and if the manga felt like it was justifying japanese expansionism, then chances are it had elements that very much did point towards that. i've had a lot of trouble grappling with reiner, annie and bertolt, because they've existed in this grey area of 'victim of oppression' and 'war criminal'; and their existence raises the question of "do people who commit war crimes simply do what needs to be done?" and by victimising them it... it plays into the whole nuremberg defense of "i was just following orders". it's making you feel bad for the people committing said war crimes (and similarly with eren, and all the awful things he's done). but i'll get more into this point later dsfkjfd

i haven't read the last chapter yet (and don't worry about spoilers! i've been approaching aot from a very... specific perspective anyway, so i actually don't mind spoilers -- i read a bunch of analyses of the series before i'd even watched it hh), but... i think if it came off as too positive about, you know... an awful thing that happened, then it absolutely makes sense that you'd feel uncomfortable?

the modernisation narrative in general is one that always skeeves me out. it's one japanese imperialists use to justify the invasion of korea (and even those infamous tweets from the one account purported to be isayama talk about how the population of korea boomed under japanese imperial occupation, which... stop.)

it's also commonly invoked in cases of development. certain members of society (usually the poor), just 'had' to die for the good of the future. who gives a damn if they consent to that? they have to.

similarly, the 'we had no choice' narrative. that's... a concerning one that crops up time and again with history apologists, the argument that "oh if x country hadn't done y, then someone else would've!" or that acts of aggression were done as pre-emptive self-defence, which is so... ugh. i just. i just hate it.

It also feels really weird w the ymir and the whole loving fritz thing. i wish we got to see more of her thought process and what conclusion she came to that led her to destroying the power of the titans.

i... hate this so much. i get that abuse is complicated and victims often have multifaceted feelings towards their abusers, but... most people would focus on that in their story? the story would be about that? but instead, it's just... a thing in the history of the world and that's... icky.

also having the genesis of the titans come from a slave girl in love with her captor... there's many levels of ick to it and i highly doubt it was handled with the appropriate level of grace and sensitivity.

honestly, this might be one of the things that pissed me off the most because of how... contradictory her backstory was with That One Chapter (you know, instead of ymir crying because she wants to be free or because she’s been trapped she........ wants to see mikasa kiss eren’s decapitated head? i guess? what the fuck?)

idk...I just think that context is sometimes everything. and i understand that media can portray incorrect things,,,, and that isayama likely didn't intend for it to become a global sensation, but i guess i'm just uncomfortable w the right wing nazis getting a comfort book ahaha.

i totally get that! even if attack on titan is meant to be anti-fascists, the fact of the matter is... a lot of fascists love it. and relate to it. which is... alarming. especially given just how popular aot is worldwide.

it’s hard because before the ending, attack on titan did feel like it was more grey; i remember saying that i wouldn’t know how to feel about it until the ending because the story was either saying “the military is corrupt and war is hell”, or it was saying “the military is corrupt and war is hell, but it is necessary.”

still sorting out my thoughts, but yeah. I think i'm having a hard time understanding what they really accomplished with the rumbling and how they gave eren a sudden lelouch role and a lot of how they made it out to be a happy thing? perhaps I'm too biased to see it fully but to me it gives a "woah. eren was a hero. he saved us from destruction. those people needed to die for us to achieve this temporary peace and new start". i suppose the rumbling gave them a levelled playing ground?

OH MY GOOOOOD okay. i haven't finished code geass. but i really don't like lelouch. i mean... i think i just don't like characters that sacrifice other people for a purported 'greater good' (i could write an Essay about how much i hate erwin smith looking at him is enough to send me into an unhinged rage), but where i'm up to in the anime, i don't like the direction they're going with eren? i mean, i've never liked eren, but... that whole "martyr for the eldians" is just. ew. especially when you see several eldian characters disagree and resist him.

why does this one guy get to make choices for everyone else? because he’s sPeCiAL? fuck off

sorry for not being coherent. maybe i'm basing this too much on feelings ahaha. trust aot to finish it's scandalous run with a scandalous end.

no omg you're being perfectly coherent :( also, if anyone's making you feel bad or stupid for how you experience media, they’re... definitely not as smart as they think they are fdslskjfdlk.

i'm of that mind that, while media consumption is in part an intellectual exercise, it is inherently very emotional; narrative media tries to make us feel as much as it makes us think. that’s what stories are for, you know? intellectual analysis is well and good but what’s the point of a story if it doesn’t make you feel anything?

that's to say, i don't believe there's such thing as basing your opinion too much on feelings :') especially since it's your personal experience with a piece of media; you don't owe anyone 'objectivity' (which is always a farce when it comes to this sort of thing) or 'logical analysis', because nobody's got any right to criticise you for engaging with media the 'wrong way'.

tl;dr I feel like the mood was too celebratory abt the rumbling, and didn't entail enough on the tragedy so much that it felt like a justification for genocide and expansionism. how do you feel abt it's ending and the message it leaves? is isayama responsible to give a morally correct answer to the cycle of hatred? you're not obligated to answer! and sorry for the rambling.

hhh yeah i guess that’s the thing at the end of the day... is isayama responsible for giving a “morally correct” answer? no, but the way the ending plays out is very telling.

like armin thanking eren? mikasa’s e n t i r e character boiling down to being in love with a mass murderer no matter how poorly he’s treated her? and one could argue that kind of ending is supposed to be unsettling, supposed to hint that the cycle will just continue, but...

framing is everything. and it’s framed like a Good, Emotional Thing, Aren’t We So Grateful Eren Did All Those Awful Things

YI think I would've been fine if we got to see more of Eren's or Yif you have a different perspective on how eren is being portrayed please do share! I just felt really yucky watching armin say "thanks for murdering all those people for us" with love,,, I suppose he was trying to make eren feel better. ach maybe I'm just overreacting. idk. im dumb ahaha . i'll send this in anyway cuz I'd love to hear your take!

HHHHHHH i just hate eren and i never got him. i felt bad for him in the beginning, but he's always been too... violent for me. there was a very short period of time in season 2 where i felt bad for him, but otherwise it’s just been... ugh. the main three have always been the weakest part of the series imo, so it’s really not surprising they’re part of the reason the ending was so. bad.

and... well, that one infamous quote pretty much sums up my issue with armin. he's supposed to be the 'intelligent' one, but he's hopelessly devoted to a homicidal maniac with whom he has a very artificial, unbelievable bond with.

at the end of the day, the "thank you for becoming our monster" thing just makes it seem like attack on titan's core message is "war is horrible, but it is necessary." it feels like it's justifying massacre. and while fiction is fiction, and sometimes it's as simple as that, i think something as politically loaded as attack on titan needs to be looked at with a critical lens when discussing what it’s trying to say or what it means.

do i think it makes someone a Bad Person for liking aot or being attached to it in some way? no, because that’s dumb, and what media someone likes =/= their Moral Goodness TM. ofc trends are a thing and certain pieces of media appeal to certain types of people, but it’s a false equivalency that misses the point.

but by that same breath, nobody is wrong or stupid or has Less Valid Opinions just because what they took away from it makes them uncomfortable.

i’m sorry this is So Long i have so many thoughts about this dskljfslkj

but at the end of the day,

levi sexy

#kacchan 💕#rowan rambles #rowan watches attack on titan #attack on titan spoilers #attack on titan tw

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hellzyeahwebwielingessays · 4 years

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‘The Absent Father and Spider-Man’s Unfulfilled Potential’: Rebuttal Part 2: Introduction Continued

Master Post

Fettinger continues that in his civilian life Peter’s life was a directionless disaster.

This is again profoundly unfair and untrue.

Peter’s life lacking direction was directly attributable to the life he led as Spider-Man.

And yet Peter managed to leave home, later get a place of his own, graduate collage, got married and was attended grad school on three separate occasions.

He only failed to finish grad school the first time around because he made the smart decision to put things on. He was struggling to juggle the increased workload, his social life and Spider-man activates. He passed the first year through the skin of his teeth and was aware the second year would be worse. At the time he’d gotten into a new relationship with the Black Cat who had been severely injured following a battle, recovering very gradually. Peter was also trying to help pay for her medical expenses. Felicia was also a reforming criminal who’s prior attempt at going straight had failed. In order to keep Felicia on the straight and narrow, in order to help her recover and build a future with her it made a lot of sense for Peter to put his education on hiatus whilst he got his affairs in order.

A quick successions of attacks upon his personal life occurred during his second attempt to complete grad school meaning he naturally dropped out again. These attacks were not his fault. Your best friend trying to kill you, your parents coming back to life, your aunt entering a coma and you having a mental breakdown all BEFORE your clone shows up and your wife gets pregnant are incredibly legitimate reasons to drop out of collage.

Only his third attempt was arguably illegitimate as he dropped out off-panel during the Mackie/Byrne run.

Even this can be defended in-universe on the grounds that his aunt May had recently been revealed to be alive, thus justifying time off. Soon after he landed his dream job. Why bother finishing school when you have the occupation you wanted. Why try to juggle that job, your family and your studies all at the same time if it is unnecessary?

Moreover Peter’s dropping out was simply one of the many, many, many, many, many out of character moments that pervaded that run and the stories intended to lead into it. Fettinger himself would tell you that so they really shouldn’t count.

Not to mention, the series never actually confirmed for us if Peter did or did not drop out. He was attending grad school and then a time skip later he wasn’t. Realistically given how a Graduate School programme can last years he likely hadn’t finished earning his degree, but again that wasn’t confirmed for us.

At the time Fettinger’s essay was published, Peter had also taken on a job as a school teacher, joined the Avengers, had made (successful) efforts to reconcile with his wife, acclimatise his Aunt May to his superhero identity, was making more time for both ladies in his life and was working to try and help rehabilitation of some of the criminals he had captured.

Hardly ‘directionless’.

This is to say nothing of how quite frankly in the mid-2000s MOST people around Peter’s age (25-30) didn’t exactly have a clear cut ‘direction’ in their lives and this was even more true in the consequent decade.

I think this is a criticism equitable to incredibly old-fashioned thinking from older people wagging their fingers at ‘the younger generations’.

Fettinger continues by saying ‘His scientific prowess should have made him a peer of Reed Richards and Tony Stark, men who became prosperous and/or well-respected for their civilian achievements, but he seems to have squandered his potential. These men are not immune from the ravages of human frailty, with alcohol being Tony’s personal demon, and Reed’s neglect of his wife Sue nearly driving her into the Sub-Mariner’s arms more than once, but both have succeeded in balancing superhero careers, satisfying intellectual pursuits, and maintaining some semblance of an organized personal life.”

This was another ‘what the fuck moment’ for me when re-reading this essay.

Honestly, as someone who loves this character this statement made me angry and even made me question if Fettinger ever actually LIKED the character himself.

First of all, have Reed and Tony even succeeded at what Fettinger claims they have?

Tony’s life has often been pretty fucked up. Circa Civil War he and Reed were the pariah’s of the super hero community. Tony’s alcoholism had brought him and his company close to ruin more than once. Reed and Sue had separated in the past more than once and at one point Reed but their son Franklin into a coma. And both men have had their lives made exponentially more difficult by being heroes.

That’s not a ‘semblance’ of an organized personal life. Just because they’ve managed to invent things and be superheroes at the same time isn’t proof to the contrary.

More importantly, even if we accept Fettinger’s claims about Reed and Tony, this is a gigantic false equivalency.

The central reason that Peter has failed to balance his super hero career, intellectual pursuits and an organized personal life is because it is impossible!

Fettinger, despite being this so-called authority on the character is demonstrating a huge misreading of the intent behind Spider-Man’s creation.

He was created specifically to be a more realistic super hero. In that context his superhero life wasn’t allegorical for a real life job or responsibility. Rather the point was to explore how a (relatively) realistic person would believable handle being a hero. This is why Peter initially seeks to use his powers selfishly and needs to learn to use them altruistically.

In other words, Peter has to deal with all the stuff we deal with in normal life in ADDITION to being a superhero.

In real life, your job or family might be the most important thing you do. But for Spider-Man they are inherently secondary.

They are just as important to Peter as they are to anyone in the real world but he also has a huge burden even greater than they are to manage.

This is literally the central conflict behind the character. The constant struggle to juggle real life responsibilities against this grander calling.

You might argue he’s the equivalent of a cop, fire fighter or soldier, but that’s not true. There are similarities rendering those roles appropriate allegories. But that allegory breaks down when you consider he is unpaid for his services, has to maintain secrecy whilst performing them and still needs to earn an income. Imagine doing your job but then also being a cop/fire fighter/soldier who has to be potentially available 24/7 as well.

Reed and Iron Man were never treated with this degree of realism in mind. None of the classic Silver Age Marvel heroes were. Daredevil developed a similar (or arguably greater) degree of realism later under Frank Miller’s pen. And noticeably he too has struggled to find a balance in his life just as Peter has.

Even if we ignore this metatextual argument, the in-universe do not corroborate Fettinger’s point.

I’m no F4 or Iron Man expert so feel free to correct me on anything I get wrong.

But last I checked, circa 2006, Reed and Tony categorically didn’t operate as heroes the way Peter did.

Reed and the other F4 were not crime fighters, and never were. They might deal with crises that arose if they were made aware of them somehow. But they weren’t keeping an eye on organized crime or the drug dealers moving onto the local street corner. They weren’t actively going on regular patrols seeking out petty theft, car jackings, alley way muggings, bank robberies, etc.

IIRC nor was Tony. I think at most he was more concerned with industrial sabotage, the activities of international criminals like the Mandarin, foreign powers like the Soviets or larger scale crises. It wasn’t like he (with or without the Avengers) was responding to every bank robbery in NYC or sticking it to the Maggia or Kingpin.

Spidey though was going out almost every day and night specifically to seek out crime and directly intervene in it. He wanted to avoid anyone else losing their ‘Uncle Ben’ to a burglar because he was passive or complacent.

That didn’t just entail living his life and intervening if he happened to bump into any crime. He was proactive in actually going on the prowl for threats he could help resolve.

Fettinger is also disgustingly unfair because he’s neglected the context surrounding when Reed, Tony and Peter became heroes.

Reed and Tony were ALREADY financially secure and scientifically accomplished men in their late-20s-late-30s when they became heroes.

They’d already figured out effectively methods of playing the game of life, they already mastered scientific skills and had a foundation of accomplishments and money that could make their superhero lives easier if anything.

It’s simply easier to maintain those things as a super hero when you start off that way.

In contrast let’ consider Peter Parker.

He was 15 when he got his powers. He was at most lower-middle class and his family didn’t have much money. Unlike Reed or Tony he had an elderly, health challenged relative to provide care and support for. He was still in school and whilst scientifically gifted didn’t yet have a full education in any scientific field. To get one he’d need to attend college but his household wasn’t able to afford that even before the breadwinner (Ben Parker) died. Therefore Peter didn’t just need to pass high school but earn a scholarship simultaneously. And as for his social life he’d never really had any friends and was thus more poorly practiced at maintaining friendships or romantic relationships than even his fellow school peers. Even if he hadn’t been he didn’t have the same level of experience with such things Reed or Tony would have had due to his age. He wasn’t done growing up yet. Granted Tony wasn’t exactly wise in the ways of serious relationships, but he nevertheless knew how to play the dating game. Reed on the other hand was engaged (or on the cusp of it) when he got his powers.

These were men who had figured out a lot of life, accomplished a lot and grown up long before they began superhero careers.

Peter was starting out with MASSIVE handicaps compared to them.

He needed to simultaneously:

Figure out how to be a grown up

Do that faster than his peers

Care for his sickly aunt

Grieve his uncle

Figure out how to navigate the social scene of people his age, including the ways of romance

Maintain his school grades

Earn a scholarship

Educate himself in various scientific fields

Become the bread winner for his household or else risking them losing their home and May’s access to the medicine that was preserving her life

THEN he needed to be a superhero on top of that!

And what did that even entail anyway?

Figuring out how his powers worked and their limits

Figuring out how to fight

Risking his life against people who regularly wanted to kill him

Dealing with people who went out of their way to target his life, sometimes having that bleed over into his civilian life

Maintaining secrecy as best as he could out of fear of being imprisoned or even killing his aunt due to the shock

Dealing with some people who were actively trying to uncover his identity

For most of his career, never having anyone to mentally relieve his burden by sharing his secret

Figuring out how to seek out crime, track crooks, gather information, the structure of criminal organizations

Fending off deadly and often more powerful opponents

Being hated and feared by most of the general public, authorities and fellow heroes.

Fighting alone most of the time

Created and maintained his own equipment which he did out of his own pocket, despite the hit it took to his finances

Being accused of various false crimes by the press, public or authorities

Helping his boss smear his name because he was the only reliable means of income Peter had

NOBODY could deal with all that. It’s a miracle Peter merely maintained his sanity, never mind successfully kept a roof over his and May’s heads, lowered the crime rate and successfully built a long-term relationship with Mary Jane.

Sure, some of that stuff would get easier over time, but even if other things hadn’t arose to make life harder for him, it’s still an impossible juggling act.

And unlike Tony or Reed Peter rarely had access to much cash, resources or a supportive team to help him. Those things would make all the difference if Reed and Tony were engaged in that time of superhero work.

Reed could rely upon his family to handle a crisis to help out with his latest experiment if necessary, giving him more time to focus upon other things. Tony could delegate duties in his company to staff members whilst he zipped off to save the world or alternatively could turn to his Avengers colleagues to handle a crisis if he needed to attend to important business. And obviously this support network could greatly help if Reed or Tony had any sickly relatives to look after.

With Peter everything was riding on him. Aunt Anna could help out at times, but she wasn’t a full time caregiver. He had no teammates to help bear the burden of fighting crime. Even his partnership with Felicia entailed going on patrol together, not her going out instead of him.

He had no financial security. He lived from one pay cheque to another because he had no choice. Even when he got older and didn’t need to worry about May as much being Spider-Man critically undermined his ability to maintain a 9-5 job. Hence why Tri-Corp (and later HORIZON labs) gave him flexi-hours and why he needed to take so much time off as a teacher and was basically kept around because Midtown High was just that desperate.

It’s one thing to maintain financial security as a super hero when you begin like that. It’s another story entirely when you are clawing your way up the economic ladder from a lower class position whilst being a hero at the same time.

The same thing applies to his scientific pursuits. Where was he supposed to find the time, money and resources to invent anything that’d win him accolades?

Gee if only there was a story which illustrated how being Spider-Man fundamentally held Peter back from fully living his own life…if only that story had then formed the basis for a major motion picture in 2004…

But yeah, if only Peter had a father figure all this would be a none issue.

From a certain POV that’s true, but only in the sense that Peter would’ve had some of the burden lifted from him. He wouldn’t have had to be as concerned about supporting Aunt May. He wouldn’t have had to have spent as much time figuring out how to play the social game if his Dad had maybe been around to show him (although Aunt May was there for that too so would Ben have made much of a difference?).

But it wouldn’t have meant his life would’ve been fixed and his potential unfulfilled. Because being Spider-Man innately held him back no matter what. He was never going to be able to hold a 9-5. He was never going to be able to give his loved ones all the attention he owed them because duty would inevitably call. And unless his father figure was loaded he’d have never had have access to the resources necessary to invent shit. But that wouldn’t have happened regardless of Richard or Ben Parker dying or not. Peter needed a scholarship even before Ben died, so the Parker household was clearly not well off financially.

Let’s also consider that Reed’s home and hero life are functionally one and the same. His scientific pursuits go hand in hand with the work the F4 usually do. This arguably became the case with Tony as well once he discarded his secret identity in the 2000s. Even before then, he had a much easier solution to maintaining his identity considering it would be believable for a rich man like him to have a super powered body guard and his tech would have enabled him to remotely control the armour at times to maintain appearances.

Peter had neither luxury, with his two lives only overlapping in moments of crisis 9/10.

Not to mention Fettinger’s logic here is hurt when we consider neither Tony nor Reed’s Dad’s were all that great in the first place. It seems both of them succeeded in spite of their father’s not because of them.

Basically, father or no father, if Peter had the same circumstances he’d have been in roughly the same position he is now. He wouldn’t have become Reed or Tony.

So confession time.

I began writing this rebuttal at a time when I had no access to Fettinger’ essay sans the physical book it came in. I began writing down bullet points for his consequent points.

And just as a reminder Fettinger’s ‘thesis’ for this essay is that Peter is a screw up with loads of ‘unfulfilled potential’ because he never had a stable father figure in his life following Ben’s death.

· Peter flunked out of college and even failed to graduate with his class because he forgot to take a required gym credit.

Peter didn’t flunk Grad school and he made up his collage degree by earning the SINGLE credit he needed over the consequent summer, which is entirely different to truly flunking.

It’s also got jack to do with not having a father or failing to fulfil his potential. Like around that time Aunt May was in the hospital, had nearly died and he was kinda busy saving people’s lives.

· Two attempts at post graduate education failed.

Actually he tried three times and ‘failed’ is very subjective. See what I said in earlier instalments about the stuff around the early-mid 1990s and the Mackie/Byrne era. Those were the second and third times he tried for a post-grad. The first time he never failed, he simply decided to quit for perfectly practical reasons and return later.

· He made only a marginal living mostly as a freelance photographer because until recently (remember this was written in 2006) when he became a high school teacher, he couldn’t hold a steady job.

Notice how he acknowledges being a high school teacher and yet claims Peter is ‘directionless’.

And more poignantly NO ONE can be Spider-Man and hold a 9-5.

That’s literally the entire reason Lee/Ditko had Peter become a photographer. Because they were trying to tell the story of a realistic super hero and a realistic superhero couldn’t hold down a 9-5 when he might be on duty at any time; even matt Murdock has a partner in Foggy Nelson to cover for him if needed. So they engineered a method for him to earn a living whilst still being Spider-Man, by making being Spidey the means to that end.

· His friendships often failed because he neglected them.

This is not true, his friendships rarely ever failed. When they did it was often not due to his being neglectful. Even on the instances where this could be said to be true again he had a good reason for that. He was SPIDER-MAN!

· Any success with women, including his marriage to Mary Jane Watson (who left at least once) owes more to his partner’s Job-like patience than any effort on his part (and part of MJ’s devotion to Peter may be tied up in her own relationship abandonment and hero worship issues).

It is true MJ has the patience of a saint. But so do the wives of many police officers, fire fighters, soldiers, politicians, political activists etc. And I do not necessarily disagree that MJ’s patience was a huge factor (maybe the biggest) in keeping that relationship going. But Fettinger’s wording here combined with the wider context of his prior points make it abundantly obvious that he isn’t saying Peter put in effort but MJ’s patience happened to be a bigger factor. He is saying that Peter did not put in enough effort, that he slacked off.

Which is bullshit because again, he was being Spider-Man and more importantly with MJ and many of his OTHER relationships he plainly DID put in effort and consideration. Also it’s disingenuous for Fettinger to refer to MJ leaving Peter because he KNOWS that was OOC nonsense and wrote about it. See his 2001 Year in Review from his Spidey Kicks Butt website or this site.

As for MJ’s ‘abandonment issues’ and ‘hero worshipping’ issues, let’s unpack that.

MJ’s issues weren’t about abandonment. Not unless Fettinger is referring to MJ herself abandoning her sister.

MJ was never abandoned as a child. Yes, in ASM #292 MJ claims her Dad walked out on her mother but re-read her origin from ASM 259 or Parallel Lives. It was the other way around.

So MJ literally hasn’t got any abandonment issues in the first place.

Even if you did contort it to being about abandoning her sister that’s not a matter of her ‘issues’. That term refers to the idea MJ has unresolved baggage that, if she only addressed, she’d have not been with Peter or stayed with him.

That interpretation though is BS for two key reasons. Firstly, MJ resisted committing to Peter for the longest time which was also at the root of her leaving her sister high and dry. Her staying with Peter when Gwen died and helping him was an example of her GROWING as a person and becoming BETTER, not her doing it as some kind of weird repentance for her abandoning her sister in her time of need.

Secondly, MJ was only able to fully commit to Peter when she’d laid her demons with her sister to rest in ASM #292. There was still unresolved business between them and her own father but when she settled that she was more comittied to her marriage to Peter not less.

Maybe Fettinger’s intent was that her father’s abuse of her represented a form of abandonment. Or maybe he just phrased himself badly and meant the latter point regardless. Well that too doesn’t hold up to scrutiny.

Parallel Lives shows us MJ’s issues with her father was a motivator for her to steer clear of Peter not grow closer to him.

And more importantly if MJ’s romance with Peter has anything to do with her father it’s only because Peter is so unlike her father. In her mind her father’s traits =bad. Peter, in having the opposite traits = good, and therefore attractive.

By any metric MJ’s desire to be with Peter clearly has nothing to do with any ‘issues’ she had. On the contrary her not being with him was because of her issues. This was incredibly basic and laid out. Fettinger himself touched upon it in this essay.

Now for her hero worship…what hero worship?

Yes MJ respected and was attracted to Peter partially because he was a hero. But that’s not an ‘issue’ because most women would likely have been attracted to such traits. Doctors or firemen are a common turn on for many women and Spidey’s job is analogous to that.

In truth MJ was turned on more by his sense of responsibility embodied by his heroism as discussed in Web #6 (which Fettinger cited in the previously linked to essay). MJ doesn’t want Peter to be a hero out of concern for his health but also recognizes that if he wasn’t a hero he wouldn’t be the man she fell in love with. Stories like Spider-Man the Final Adventure and the MC2 universe though prove how MJ wouldn’t fall out of love with Peter if he quit being Spider-Man.

She doesn’t have hero worship issues!

· If we didn’t know Peter was Spider-Man we would probably consider him either “brilliant but lazy?” (see ‘Spider-Man 2’) or simply a loser.

Right except we DO know he is Spider-Man hence so many of the above criticisms are totally out of line, even ignoring many of the blatant inaccuracies to them.

· He appears to be a chronic underachiever in both identities.

Yeah no. That statement ignores then recent developments in Spidey titles. More importantly it ignores the fact that to ‘fulfil his potential’in either identity he’d have to have access to things (like money and team support) that he simply lacked or else dedicate himself to one life over the other which he cannot do. It isn’t that there is something wrong with HIM it’s that the nature of his SITUATION is rarely conjunctive to success.

· Why is this? What kept him from putting the disparate parts of his life together and becoming an even greater hero?

What further greatness does he really need?

Circa 2006 he’d become an Avenger, the premier heroes of the Marvel universe. He had won a Hell of a lot of battles against seriously powerful foes. He’d saved countless people in his time an lowered the crime rate.

I’m just going to give you the gist of Fettinger’s next several points.

He basically argues that Peter has always subconsciously sought out a father figure to replace Uncle Ben.

Which is TRUE.

But he goes on to argue that the reason for Peter’s unfulfilled potential is BECAUSE he’s lacked this father figure in his life. To be fair to him and give him the benefit of the doubt he does say a positive male role model ‘could’ have made the difference and qualifies that there are plenty of people who do fine without positive male role models.

The problem is that he’s set up this whole essay by being cynically over critical, inaccurate and disingenuous about Peter’s ‘failings’.

Meaning he isn’t clearly asserting that Peter’s lack of a father merely might be the cause for his ‘underachieving’. He is clearly saying Peter is an underachiever and lacking a proper father is the reason why. It’s also disingenuous because Fettinger earlier on in the essay called out Peter as an underachiever by comparing him to womanizing, alcoholic hedonist and weapons manufacturer Tony Stark who you know...had an awful Dad!

· Fettinger lists off the difficulties of growing up in general and how supporting Aunt May and being a superhero made that more difficult. And how it’d be especially hard when doing it on your own. Which is true and a father by his side to help him would’ve made Peter’s life much easier.

But to say that the complications he faced wouldn’t exist if he had a father is asinine.

Aunt May still could have died as she did repeatedly.

There is no assurance that Peter would’ve confided the truth into Uncle Ben or any male role model in his life.

And balancing normal life whilst being a hero is innately impossible even if Peter did have an easier time growing up because there wasn’t as much of a burden on him to support May or figure out how to socialize or be a man on his own.

His life would’ve been easier but her wouldn’t have achieved all Fettinger claimed he’s leaving unfulfilled.

Shit, Mayday Parker never balanced things even though she had it objectively easier than Peter ever did. And her Dad was literally Spider-Man!

· Fettinger writes that without May or MJ Peter would likely have fallen apart.

On this he is on the money.

· He writes that neither May nor MJ can relate to Peter as a genius, a superhuman being, a pursuer of justice nor simply as a man. Neither could substitute for a father figure.

Which is...kinda true....but also kind of not.

Yes MJ and May cannot directly relate to Peter in any of those ways. But, exempting being a male, neither could any given father figure. Other specific father figures (like the ones Fettinger goes on to discuss in the essay) potentially could though so I suppose he was just setting up the rest of his essay.

That being said Peter’s sense of justice didn’t come from nowhere so May could perhaps relate to this on some level. And MJ has shown that she has a certain sense of justice herself.

· Fettinger continues by listing off different potential father figures for Peter and examining the hypothetical end results of if they’d fulfilled their roles as father figures.

I’m going to dedicate an instalment to each one of them starting next time.

So with that I’ll leave it there.

Master Post

#spider-man #mjwatsonedit #mary jane watson #Mary Jane Watson Parker #Peter Parker #MJ Watson #Aunt May #May Parker #Ben Parker #Uncle Ben

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scrollingkingfisher · 5 years

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Gabriel Through the Seasons- Control and Self-Deception

An excessively long essay, by me.

Evening peeps! So the topic of Gabriel’s relationship with control came up in the discord last night and it resulted in an entire TED talk which I didn’t even know was in me. So here we go, all tidied up and ready for meta consumption!

So Gabriel’s complex relationship with control is written into his character from the very first time we see him on screen. In Crawford Hall, he orchestrates the whole thing- he punishes people, but it’s always from a safe distance, never getting his hands dirty. He's actively manipulating the Winchesters for the entire time they're there in a similar way. Illusions are one of the first ways that he uses to control situations and keep them at arm’s length- let’s call them his first line of defence. Through them he can distract and confuse, and it means he doesn’t have to get too close to the action, either emotionally or physically. He uses his illusions to give the Winchesters the impression they got the better of him, but really I think that was him sizing them both up, and using his persona as the trickster to keep some emotional distance from the situation- his second line of defence.

Next up- Mystery Spot. Gabriel's control complex comes out big time. The apocalypse is getting closer, Dean's played his cards, Gabriel's family-related trauma is rearing its ugly head from where he'd managed to stash it under all those layers of repression, and the situation is suddenly more immediate than he’d like. So what can he do, both to maintain distance from the situation, get some kind of control over it and to try and avert having to deal with his brothers? Oh look, a convenient vessel of the apocalypse! But he can't just tell him what's gonna go down, because that would require trust, and then the ball would be in Sam's court. Telling Sam what was going to happen would have meant relinquishing control of the situation, and he doesn’t want to get too involved either. Better to stay in his comfort zone of using his alter ego to teach Sam a lesson from a distance. It works out excellently, obviously. Sam is particularly good at cutting to the chase, over the seasons- probably because he has a similar (but not identical) relationship with control and autonomy. And that's the first time we really see Gabriel break character. Then we get to see what imo is probably closer to what he's really feeling. When somebody takes that control of the situation away from him, it makes him either scrabble to get his mask back on, or get incredibly angry and absolutely fucking lose it, or he gets overwhelmed and runs away from the situation. Which is exactly what he does on this particular occasion. Sam calls him out, Gabriel realises that he’s no longer in control here, he gives up on teaching Sam a lesson and he’s off.

Changing Channels is a whole ‘nother ball game. The complete control Gabriel takes over the situation- literally puppeteering them around his own sets- he’s eve controlling their environment. Throwing the Winchesters around and teaching them a lesson like he can't do with their angelic counterparts. Bullying them into playing their roles, because if he can't stop the apocalypse, he needs to feel like he has control over what's happening somehow, yeah? The angry outburst when Dean calls him out. And that anger when provoked is another recurring theme. If I had to guess, I’d say that the anger is another shield, his third and final defence- this time though, it’s a shield against himself, and his own emotions about his situation. Gabriel is not about facing his emotions head on. Repression is the name of the game, and like nearly everybody on SPN, he’s very good at it. And then, finally, the Winchesters know who he is and the layers of deception peel away. Gabriel can't hide any more; they know what he is. He can't run away. And he manages to keep it together, just, but I think it's a close thing, because the bitter resignation as he finally explains to the brothers what's going on? That's as honest as he gets.

Then we get to Hammer of the Gods, and this one's a little different, because as the audience we're seeing Gabriel's shields and attempts to control the situation from a slightly different angle. Gabriel is cool as a cucumber while he's with the other gods, because he NEEDS to be otherwise they'll slaughter him and he knows it (story of his life- he can never trust anyone), but as soon as he's alone with the Winchesters, he drops the act, if not the attempts to control the situation. Then he spends the rest of the episode desperately running around, trying to maintain a series of ever-more-convoluted deceptions, until he finally has to face Lucifer. And as much as I love Gabriel's return, it was absolutely in character here for him to pull one last layer of deception and nope out of the entire thing. He's stressed beyond belief. His brother just nearly stabbed him. He needs some RnR and several liquor stores.

Maybe that's why he lets his guard down with Loki and relinquishes control of the situation. And immediately it's proven why Gabriel can never let his guard down, even with his ‘allies’, because they fucking sell him. Cue eight years of torture.

Asmodeus was probably the literal worst thing that could have happened to Gabriel. Because if it had just been pure torture, I think he would have held up quite well. But Asmodeus stripped away Gabriel's control and autonomy. All of it. He’s a slave, but it’s worse than that, they condition him and break him until he doesn’t even run away. And that speech in Unfinished Business? Wow. He felt absolutely violated by what was done to him, and it's never explicitly talked about, but it's made fairly obvious what happened. When he comes back, he has no walls at all, no deceptions, no control over his situation or himself, and he spends the majority of the episode quivering in the back of his own mind. Sam eventually manages to coax him out, but not before showing weakness of his own by basically begging for help, and therefore handing Gabriel a little bit of control back. And then Gabriel finally at the end of the episode manages to gain back a bit of control over his life when he realises there's an opening to kill Asmodeus, and WHAM, the masks are back up, witty quip time, look at me I've got my powers back and I'm gonna burn you in a very Extra way because this rage inside has nothing at all to do with how you ripped my self-control away from me. And then Sam asks for help, and he sees a potential for someone trying to control him again, and obviously, he's gone.

Next up: Unfinished Business. Whoo boy there's a whole lot to unpack here. First off he's hunting the people who sold him. Not because they're posing a threat- they probably still thought he was still with Asmodeus until he started hunting him down- but because they caused him massive trauma and REVENGE SIDEQUEST has a better ring to it than fall-apart-alone-because-I-don't-dare-to-trust-anyone. And Gabriel has to have control over his own reactions even more than he likes to control the people around him. Gabriel never lets himself be vulnerable, even to himself. And he is hurt, and angry, so revenge quest it is! He starts before he's ready, because letting himself wallow is a no-go, so obviously he gets stabbed and ends up with the Winchesters again, because they're his least-worst option. He knows they're hunting for him, but he went to them, so he's in control, right? RIGHT! So he spins the Winchesters a story (dubiously realistic emotional mask of hot babes and decadence ahoy). But obviously Dean's that git who can't keep his fingers out of the emotional cracks, and he pushes a little too far and Gabriel loses control, and we see what Gabriel's feeling again. Or rather, what Gabriel's letting himself feel, and that’s all anger. But under it, reading between the lines, there's the emotions that he can't control, that feeling of incredible vulnerability and violation, of having your control taken from you. And that carries through to when Loki, who obviously knows him, who Gabriel has obviously confided in previously ("boohoo, Gabriel with his mean older brothers"?), uses his knowledge of that vulnerability to absolutely rip into him, to really grind in the point while he's helpless, and even after he's defeated (by Sam throwing him the sword, not by Gabriel being able to do it himself), there's no celebration, there's no witty quips, because Loki tore down Gabriel's self delusions of control. It's an empty victory. And we see that in the scene outside where he's talking to Sam. The shields are back up, he has control of the situation and himself, and he knows that Sam knows he's faking being "swell" but at least going with the Winchesters provides something to do, a little more control for a little longer. But inside? He's even more vulnerable now, because Loki took away any sort of internal defences he might have had with his little parting speech. This is where his descent begins. His expression when Sam turns away? Absolutely hopeless and dead inside. His self-defence of anger is gone, and that's not a good thing.

I haven't watched the rest of the episodes quite as obsessively, but I'll still do the broad strokes. Getting it on with Rowena? Exercising power and autonomy over his own actions, with a healthy side-helping of "Could a depressed person do this??" He doesn't have as many problems with confronting Lucifer as one might expect, but then again, he's in control. He's got Lucifer drugged up to the nines before he even drops his disguise, and then he takes gleeful advantage of the situation to play with him for a little bit because finally, he's got control over that brother who caused him all that anguish! Revenge is almost second nature at this point. But he never breaks character through the entire confrontation. He maintains that emotional distance. Fast-forward into the apocalypse world, and I think Gabriel is genuinely deeply upset by his inability to heal Sam. One more time where he was absolutely helpless to do shit all, he has no control over the outcome, and he's not raging this time, but he's quiet and withdrawn, and that's a bad sign because he's nearly fresh out of coping mechanisms. Then Lucifer comes back. Gabriel spends the next however long scouting way way out ahead or skulking on the edges of camp, because he knows that this time, the ball will not be in his court, and at the end of the day Gabriel likes to avoid confrontation when at all possible, because why risk it? And we see him slowly sinking deeper into that depression, those thoughts that he'd managed to put off earlier through anger and revenge. He has no power. He has no control over what happens to himself or anyone else. But he manages to hoist the shields up reasonably well when Lucifer corners him, enough to get in a few good quips. But they're pretty damn transparent by this point. He's not cocky any more as he chews Lucifer out. He's just tired. And then Michael attacks, and, well. What do you do when you have no more power over your own trauma, no more leverage or self-belief, and the only control you have is which metaphorical train you throw yourself in front of?

Gabriel sees one last opportunity to take control of his destiny.

And he takes it.

#Gabriel #meta #supernatural #my metas #spoilers for up to s13 #implied suicide #because I don't think he ever intended on lasting long

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slytherinknowitall · 4 years

Text

Potion Fumes and Cauldron Leaks

Chapter 11: Just A Filthy Mudblood

(Click here for chapter 10!)

(Click here to start from the beginning!)

Disclaimer: I don’t own the “Harry Potter” book series. The story of “Harry Potter” is the property of J. K. Rowling, it is not my intellectual property. There is no financial gain made from this nor will any be sought. This is for entertainment purposes only.

Over the course of the following month, there was a noticeable cold distance between the Potions Master and his apprentice. Somehow, his snarky comments following the brewing accident seemed to have affected the young witch a lot more than any of his other equally mean remarks in the past. As a result, she stopped raising her hand during class and was always the last one to enter and the first one to leave the gloomy dungeon room – if she showed up at all, that was.

Severus knew that it was very much unlike her to skip class, of course; but he left it at deducting points whenever she did. At the end of the day, she was Minerva’s responsibility and not his. In fact, he was rather glad about the change in her behaviour. He was glad that her essays, which had used to be so elaborate and verbose, were now kept to a minimum and soon turned dull, reading no different to other students’ work. He was even more glad that she wouldn’t make eye contact with him and only gave one-word answers as needed, even during their private lessons. Her complete refusal to communicate with him made it a hell of a lot easier to get her out of his head. After a few weeks, he stopped having indecent thoughts about her all together which finally put his mind at ease – that silly infatuation had only been a phase after all.

Or at least that was what he believed until one fateful Friday evening in mid-October.

Snape was sitting at the cluttered desk in his dark office, grading papers about Lobalug venom and its uses in potions written by his third-year Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff students. The essay in front of him at that very moment was starting to turn into a sea of red ink and Severus rolled his eyes in frustration. While they certainly had their good qualities, he had yet to encounter a Hufflepuff with a single ounce of talent for potion brewing.

Just as he was about to write a particularly nasty comment at the bottom of the three-foot-long parchment roll, there suddenly was the sound of commotion coming from outside the door.

“Piss off!” the deep voice of a man could be heard resonating through the dungeon hallway.

“No!” Severus instantly matched the high-pitched tone of the second person to Granger. “As Head Girl, it is my duty to protect all students from any physical or emotional harm, and I clearly saw you use the Stinging Hex on poor little Stewart Ackerly as he was going up the Grand Staircase. So whether you like it or not, you will be accompanying me to your Head of House for appropriate disciplinary action at once!”

“Listen here, you minger!” the male retaliated angrily. “I will not be told what to do by someone like you, do you fucking understand?! I do not give a shit about what stupid little title that knobhead of a headmaster gave you or what idiotic principles you think you need to uphold – I will not be bossed around by a Mudblood! The war may be over, but don’t think for a second that you will ever be more than the scum of the earth! Your kind shouldn’t even be allowed at this school!”

When Severus then heard a loud bang directly followed by a squealing outcry, he finally jumped out of his chair and rushed to the door. By the time he had pushed it open and run into the secluded corridor, Theodore Nott had already cornered Granger in an alcove, pushing her significantly smaller frame against the mouldy stone wall as his wand was buried deep in the flesh of her throat.

“I should really just take you out here and now. Not that anyone would care about one less rotten Mudblood tainting –“

All the Potions professor needed was one simple hand movement to nonverbally and wandlessly disarm the Slytherin and catapult him several feet into the air, eliciting an anguished yelp upon impact with the hard ground. Meanwhile, the now freed witch dropped to the floor. Breathing heavily, she struggled to contain her tears as her hand shot up to rub her flushed neck.

“Miss Granger, would you please go into my office and wait there while I … take care of this situation,” Severus muttered, dangerously calm as he walked towards the young pure-blood cowering in front of him.

“But –“

“Now, Miss Granger.”

Out of the corner of his eye, he could see her frantically use the sleeve of her grey sweater to wipe her reddened eyes as she slowly got back up on her feet, throwing once last glance at her assailant before brushing past them and disappearing into the office.

Once Snape heard the lock latch, he grabbed the boy at his feet by the collar and violently pushed him against the wall, much like the wimp had done to the Gryffindor just seconds earlier.

“Mr Nott,” he basically spat the name into the lanky adolescent’s face. “Just what is it that you think you are doing?! Not only did you defy the orders of the Head Girl – someone who has nearly as much disciplinary power as any professor at this school, mind you – but you also just threatened and physically assaulted another student!”

He could practically smell the teenager’s fear. “But Professor, she deserved it! A Mudblood like her –“

“DO NOT EVER DARE TO USE THAT WORD IN MY PRESENCE AGAIN!” Severus roared, the veins of his neck protruding painfully. “Now that the Dark Lord is gone, I will no longer be tolerating this kind of behaviour at this school! Slytherin or not, you would do better to keep your idiotic prejudices to yourself – because if I ever hear you or anyone else use such terminology again, you will learn the hard way that there are worse things to go through other than the Cruciatus Curse, believe me!” With that, he pushed Nott away from him.

“To show you just how unacceptable your behaviour was, I shall deduct 250 points from Slytherin,” he continued, not giving him a chance to speak. “In addition, you will be serving detention twice a week for the rest of the school year; I do believe that Mr Filch could use some help scrubbing the toilets. You will also no longer be permitted to attend any Quidditch games or take part in any Hogsmeade weekend visits. Oh, and I shall also deduct another 50 points for your assault on that Ravenclaw boy.”

Giving him one last scowl, he pointed down the hallway. “Now, get out of my sight!”

Severus watched on in disgust as Nott hurriedly picked up his wand before scurrying off into the depths of the dungeons. Taking a few minutes to regain his composure, he remembered himself around that age.

An outside and a misfit, he had always tried so very desperately to fit in. He’d only had one real friend in his entire lifetime who had truly cared for him – Lily. But in his foolish arrogance, he had managed to screw even that up. It had been then that he had made the biggest mistake of his life: joining Voldemort’s ranks and becoming a Death Eater.

Subconsciously rubbing his left forearm, he felt disappointed in how ignorant he had been. Looking back, it was so easy to see the stupidity of it all – bitter witches and wizards who hadn’t been able to accept the fact that the blood purity they so frantically tried to cling onto no longer possessed any significance whatsoever and a maniac who had turned himself into a monster trying to become immortal. Severus may not be able to change the past, but he would be damned if he let this idiocy carry on any longer.

Shaking his head, he turned around and went back into his office. At first glance, he thought that Granger had somehow managed to sneak out while he had been telling her attacker off as he couldn’t detect her anywhere in the little room. But then he discovered her sitting on the old, rickety three-legged stool he kept in the back corner, her legs hugged tightly to her body.

“Miss Granger –“

At his words, she abruptly startled up, and Severus could see her tear-streaked face. She was a blubbering mess. An agonised sob escaped her mouth before she quickly hid her face behind her hands.

Stunned, Severus walked over to her and carefully placed his hand on her quivering shoulder, trying very hard to ignore how his heart seemed to skip a beat as he touched her.

“Miss Granger,” he repeated. But yet again, he only received more pitiful whimpers in response.

Snape let out a deep sigh before squatting down in front of her. While he had made many students cry in his days, he had never tried to console one before.

“Please look at me, Miss Granger. Why are you so distraught?” he asked in what he believed to be a soothing tone.

After a few more sniffles and sobs, her shaking voice could finally be heard coming from underneath the mountain of untamed curls.

“He’s right,” she said softly, keeping her face well-hidden.

Severus frowned. “Certainly not. Even though Mr Nott may be of a different opinion, the positions of Head Girl and Head Boy are important ones that have proven themselves useful for many centuries now and – “

“No,” she interrupted him hoarsely. “He’s right about me being a Mudblood.”

Severus was flabbergasted. “Don’t say –“

“BUT IT’S TRUE!” she practically screamed, her head shooting up to reveal the anguished expression on her blotchy face. “Voldemort may be dead, but things haven’t changed! In people’s eyes, I will always be worth less because I am Muggle-born. It doesn’t matter how hard I try; even if I’m the best at everything, I will never be more than a, a –“

A lone tear escaped her chocolate brown eyes. “A filthy Mudblood.”

When Severus didn’t react immediately, still too dumbfounded to speak, she grimaced bitterly before jumping up and bolting for the door.

“Miss Granger, don’t –“ he pleaded, grabbing her by the wrist which in turn caused her to lose her footing and fall back onto him. Unable to remain upright following the accidental collision, he soon found himself on the dusty floor, with the bawling girl lying on top of him.

Severus promptly tried to get back up again, embarrassed by the sudden physical contact, but Granger just sobbed even louder and buried her face in the crook of his neck.

Fuck. Fuck. What is she doing?!

He momentarily panicked, not knowing what to do. But then – following a sudden urge inside of him that could only be described as the basic human instinct to comfort the suffering – he awkwardly embraced her shaking frame and started to slowly stroke her back.

“Miss Granger,” he muttered gently, the words leaving his mouth seemingly involuntarily. “I might have to obliviate you after saying this, but believe me when I say that you are worth more than all of Britain’s pure-bloods combined. This school has never seen a pupil as brilliant and smart as you. It is not your fault that those backward-thinking fanatics cannot come around to accept that one’s blood status has nothing to do with one’s magical abilities, you being the best example for that. You are not worth less just because you were born to non-magical parents. If anything, you are superior to those of us who grew up solely in the wizarding community, as you can move around the Muggle world freely without causing much of a stir – you’ve got the best of both worlds, really!”

When his lousy attempt at a joke was met with only more wailing and trembling, he hurriedly carried on with his speech. “Besides, you are a war hero, Miss Granger! If it hadn’t been for your wits and resourcefulness, Potter would have been killed a long time ago; probably not even at the hands of the Dark Lord but rather due to a botched brewing attempt or the like. You played a key role in the downfall of the most dangerous wizard to have ever existed, and any Death Eater that is still left out there as well as those who continue to sympathise with that antiquated mindset would do better to fear you. I mean, none of my Slytherins were even brave enough to become my apprentice. Tell me how anyone could claim themselves to be of superior descent if they cannot even bring themselves to face the bat of the dungeons? Not that any of them would have been academically ambitious enough anyway …”

Severus made a small pause before he continued, “As hard as it may be, do not let their ignorant remarks get to you, and do not let yourself be consumed by hatred for them either, as there is already enough hate in the world as it is. If anything, feel pity for them. Their dim-witted pride occupies them so much that they cannot even get any joy from life. They let themselves be controlled by their fear of becoming insignificant, of losing the power they once held. They cannot admit to themselves that they have nothing left but their half-burned family tapestries filled with incest and tragedy. And once they come to their senses and realise their mistakes – which hopefully, they one day will – be the bigger person and forgive them. The heavy burden of their sins will be punishment enough. I –“

He struggled to find the right words. “I myself am guilty of such a shameful past, and I have spent the last 20 years paying for it. Unfortunately, some people do not seem to learn from history, and it truly mortifies me to see my Slytherins, the students of my beloved house, follow in the footsteps of their misguided parents. It’s … it’s just not right and it never will be.”

No longer audibly crying, the girl in his arms appeared to have at last been calmed down by his words, and Severus was glad about that; just like many men, he was absolutely terrified of a woman’s tears. Taking a deep breath, he finally did what he had done so rarely in life and never to a student at that: He apologised.

“My actions towards you were so often intolerantly mean, Miss Granger. Not only regarding the unfortunate incident with the Boil Cure, which was really caused by my carelessness rather than yours; but also all the years I let you and your …” Trying not to upset her any further, he searched for a neutral word to use for her dunderhead friends. “Peers suffer from my admittingly despotic teaching style. I had to uphold a certain façade, of course; considering that I was still pretending to be on the Dark Lord’s side. However, I often took it too far. Especially you, Miss Granger, should not have been put through all that, as you were an excellent, outstanding student. I know that I certainly do not deserve it, but I hope that you can find it in your heart to one day forgive me.”

Not daring to breathe, he waited for a response – but there was none. Granger remained completely quiet.

Sheer terror arose inside him. Had he gone too far? Did she feel cornered by his sudden confession? Oh, he knew that he shouldn’t have done that! Opening up to anyone – particularly a student – was just asking for trouble. Now she would undoubtedly go out and tell all of her moronic little friends about how much of a weak pussy he really was, and then they would never take him seriously ever again! Just the thought of it was enough to cause him to abruptly become irate.

“Enough of this nonsense,” he said in his typical cold and threatening voice. “For your pathetic behaviour, I shall deduct 40 points from Gryffindor. House of the brave, my arse! Now, get off me at once!”

Still, no response.

“Miss Granger?” Severus asked a bit less forcefully this time, a look of slight confusion appearing on his face. “Miss Granger! … Hermione?”

Just then, a loud snore escaped Granger’s lips – she had fallen asleep minutes ago.

Not wanting to wake her up now that she had finally settled down, Severus carefully readjusted her position on his body and let his head fall back until it came to a rest on the stone floor. He would wait a while to make sure that she was properly asleep before moving her off him and getting back to work. And meanwhile, he would just ignore that stupid feeling forming in his stomach.

Yes, that’s what he would do.

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When Hermione woke up the next morning, her body was aching terribly, but at the same time, she felt extremely well-rested. To tell the truth, she hadn’t slept that well since her fifth year. Sirius’ death had made it all real back then, and she had been battling terrible nightmares ever since. A faint smile appeared on her face – maybe those days were finally behind her!

Her eyes still closed, she snuggled up closer to the life-size teddy bear behind her which her older cousin had won for her at their town’s fair more than a decade ago. Only that teddy bears normally didn’t groan or pull you closer to them – and so the brunette was abruptly wide-awake.

Understandably shocked and confused, Hermione’s eyes flew open, but she immediately flinched in pain; for some reason, her eyelids were swollen and hurt when she tried to open them. How weird, had she been crying?

A quick wandless healing spell later, she was finally able to take in her surroundings. Not that this helped her confusion at all: All she could see was a dark room, dimly lit by a few magically enchanted candles fixed to a dark grey stone wall. Was she in the dungeons? If so, she certainly couldn’t remember how she got there. And why was she lying on the floor? The young woman was quite frankly baffled.

Just then, her “teddy bear” called attention to himself yet again with another loud grunt, reminding her of what had caused her to wake up in the first place. By now, she was certain that whoever was behind her wasn’t her beloved stuffed animal, of course; as it was not only a mere Muggle product without the ability to move or make sounds, but it had also been located on the bed in her childhood room the last time she’d seen it. So who was it that was holding onto her with that grip made of steel?

She frantically ran through the possibilities in her head and for a split second, she even believed herself to have been kidnapped by one of the few remaining Death Eaters still at large, but she quickly dismissed that thought; one of Voldemort’s fanboys surely wouldn’t be hugging her spoon-style.

The next scenario that her mind came up with was a drunken night that had ended in a make-out session with some random guy. Not that she had ever done anything like that before, but that was what always happened in the movies, right? She couldn’t remember getting drunk; however, Hogwarts was famous for its secret student parties. Normally, it would have been her job as Head Girl to prevent those, but what if she had got herself caught up in something just this once?

Hermione furrowed her brows. Oh god, what if it was Ron?! Had she finally given into his advances? She couldn’t help but feel sick to her stomach at the thought of his bloated lips kissing her mouth and his pasty hands roaming her body. If that was really what had happened, then their friendship would be over – there was just no way she could ever look him in the eyes again.

And so even though she would rather not know, she simply had to find out whose hands were holding onto her waist at this very moment. Gulping, she slowly turned her head towards the person behind her. But instead of seeing the expected ginger head of hair and the freckled face of her best friend, she was looking straight into the sleeping face of Severus Snape.

“Oh no,” the girl whispered, her eyes wide in shock. “Oh no, no, no, no, no! What the –“

When the sudden noise caused him to stir, she quickly covered her mouth with her hand – it wouldn’t do any good to waken the Dungeon Bat before she had figured this whole situation out.

After what felt like an eternity, the wizard finally settled down again, and it was only after her lungs started to ache that Hermione realised that she had been holding her breath.

Okay, Hermione, relax! There has to be a reasonable explanation as to how you and Professor Snape ended up like this. Just think!

Purposely avoiding looking in her cuddling partner’s direction, Hermione racked her brain – but she simply could not come up with a plausible reason for their current situation. She didn’t have any classes taking place in the dungeons on Friday evenings and she also couldn’t remember having any extra apprenticeship lessons scheduled with her tutor; not that she would have had agreed to one in the first place. So why had she come down here? And what’s more, what had led to her and Professor Snape cuddling on the cold floor of his office?

Already close to a panic attack, the previous night’s events finally came back to her: How Theodore Nott had attacked her. How Professor Snape had come to her rescue. How she had been able to hear him tear the Slytherin apart. How she had broken down crying. How she had tripped and fallen onto her teacher who had then tried to comfort her. How safe she had felt in his strong arms before drifting off to sleep.

Hermione’s relief about this G-rated explanation was short-lived, however, because she soon noticed how her professor’s face was just a mere inch away from hers. Being this close to him felt so embarrassingly intimate that she couldn’t help her face turning beet red. She made a feeble attempt to remove his arms from around her body, but that just caused him to squeeze her even tighter. Merlin’s pants, what was she supposed to do now?

Trying to ignore Snape’s soft snoring, she pondered for a few seconds before ultimately reaching down between them. After some awkward fiddling, she finally managed to extract her wand from the pocket of her skirt. A basic conjuring spell later, she was holding a fairly large white pillow in her hands.

She took a shaky breath – so far, so good. Now came the tricky part: In one swift movement, she slipped out from between his arms while simultaneously replacing her form with the cushion. While the Potions Master certainly didn’t seem too happy about losing his cuddly toy – Hermione could have sworn that she even saw him pout for a split second – he soon settled back down. His apprentice exhaled in relief.

Trying not to make a sound, she stood up and quickly made herself presentable again by smoothing out her rather wrinkly clothes and fixing her tousled hair. Checking her wristwatch, she realised that it was only 4.53 a.m. – with a bit of luck, it was still early enough for her to sneak back to her tower without anyone noticing.

But just as she was about to head for the door, Hermione took another look at the sleeping man. Snape looked surprisingly peaceful as he lay there, with a five o'clock shadow gracing his cheeks and a bit of drool coming out of the corner of his half-open mouth. He definitely didn’t look as angry or threating anymore, that was for sure. Not that Hermione had ever been scared of him; she had never truly believed him to be that mean monster all the other students – especially her fellow Gryffindors – made him out be. Yes, he had definitely intimidated her during her younger years and he had even made her cry once or twice. But knowing that he had been putting his life on the line trying to save the world from Voldemort, Hermione had always respected and trusted the Potions professor. He was one of the good ones, regardless of how grumpy and nasty he could be. And while he had deeply hurt her feelings with his mean words following the accident, she couldn’t be mad at him anymore after his actions from the previous night. He had not only saved her from an attack, but he had also tried to console her.

A small smile appeared on her lips as she stepped closer to his sleeping figure. Leaning forward, she examined his face. While he certainly wasn’t a classic beauty, he could still be considered handsome. His hair looked a bit uncared for and his nose was a little too big, but with that strong jawline and those prominent black eyebrows, that only added to his rugged and manly look.

He looked so calm and content in that moment that Hermione almost reached out her hand to touch his cheek. Instead, she swiftly conjured a blanket with which she covered his resting form. She then walked over to his desk, which was still filled with dozens upon dozens of documents and essays, and ripped a small piece of parchment paper off a blank roll. Using Snape’s golden quill, she quickly scribbled down some words before quietly moving to the door and leaving the room, the dark-haired wizard still sound asleep on the floor.

*************** *************** ***************

It was not even an hour later when Severus opened his black eyes. Still dazed, he let out a hoarse grunt as he propped himself up on one elbow. He wasn’t surprised about waking up in his office; he had oftentimes found himself there after being summoned by the Dark Lord and spending long nights at Death Eater raids. However, he had never woken up with a pillow underneath his head and a fluffy blanket draped across his body.

Following a brief moment of confusion, he remembered the previous night.

I must have fallen asleep as well.

After a quick scan of the room, he was sure that he was alone. Feeling a heavy migraine approaching, Severus let out a deep sigh before climbing to his feet. He didn’t even want to think about the Gryffindor’s opinion on him now.

With a simple flick of his wand, he swiftly sleeked down his jet-black hair and made his beard stubbles disappear before making his way to the desk. While he felt absolutely whacked physically, he had to admit that he had slept surprisingly well. In fact, he hadn’t slept that well since his own years as a student. Severus frowned. Not that that had anything to do with the little know-it-all, he told himself.

Slumping into his leather chair, he was just about to reach for one of the bottom drawers in search of some bottle of hard liquor to drown his memories of the previous night in when he noticed a short note written in that small, neat handwriting he knew all too well sitting on top of a pile of yet to be corrected essays.

Thank you. – H.

As he read the brief scribble, he could feel a strange, warm feeling that he hadn’t known in about two decades creep through his body.

Shit.

He was starting to like Granger.

(Click here for chapter 12!)

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patrickbrewerisgay · 5 years

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Your tags about David's romantic gestures are everything😍💖

we were just having this discussion in chat earlier about how a lot of people can’t see what patrick sees in david. i’ll admit that this is something i have also struggled with, only because david & i are SO similar & it’s difficult for me to find (or admit) anything lovable about myself. like david, i am anxious, dramatic, self-absorbed, judgmental, & catty. but the transformational arc that david goes through over the course of the series, & over the course of his relationship with patrick, shows us depths that we couldn’t see before.

for one thing david is fiercely loyal to those he loves, which we get early hints of in episodes like 3x10 sebastien raine, where he is so protective of moira. but it’s with patrick that we finally see david opening up & letting himself shed his armor to reveal the loving parts of himself that he was too afraid to show before. for one thing, he may be anxious all the time, but when a loved one needs him, he is suddenly a rock, an island of calm in a stormy sea. obviously the biggest examples would be 5x11 meet the parents & 5x13 the hike (& in 5x6 rock on! to a lesser extent, though his anxiety ends up getting the better of him [thanks alexis!]).

in meet the parents, david sets aside his own insecurities to fully be there for patrick. we KNOW how insecure david is about his romantic relationships being more meaningful to him than they are to his partners, & while at this point some of that worry surely has settled down in regards to patrick, his world is a little rocked when he finds out that patrick has been keeping him a secret from his parents this whole time. old traumas are hard to shake; however we see david suddenly transform into this fiercely protective, confident, resolute comfort blanket of love for patrick. he does everything to make things okay, including putting himself in a vulnerable position with patrick’s parents while still under the impression that they may not accept or condone their son’s relationship with him. we see him literally wrap himself around patrick & hold onto him for dear life when patrick admits his fears about his parents. david in this moment doesn’t care how long it takes patrick to tell his parents about david; his concern is patrick’s safety & comfort. he could get angry & take offense to being kept a secret, but he shows so much goddamn empathy towards patrick’s feelings & insecurities over coming out. then at the party he is THERE for patrick with a reassuring word & smile, & even though he knows at this point that patrick’s parents will be accepting, he is still thinking of patrick’s feelings & saying exactly what patrick needs to hear in this moment. he could trivialize patrick’s feelings, but he never does. without missing a beat, david rose drops all of his baggage & all of his worry when patrick is in need.

to me the hike is another perfect example of david’s protective & caring nature. he starts off being dramatic, bratty, & ungrateful, but when he sees the toll of his actions, he is immediately able to quit this behavior, acknowledge that he was wrong, & re-center the afternoon on patrick. he quickly transitions into seeing the day & his own behavior through patrick’s eyes, & he realizes that he hasn’t been fair or sensitive to what patrick wanted to do for him. then this boy who has been whining about a heavy backpack for the past several hours CARRIES HIS BOYFRIEND UP A MOUNTAIN without even getting winded, because he is just SO overwhelmed with the need to care for patrick that he becomes like one of those moms who gets a surge of adrenaline & suddenly develops super strength to lift a car off their trapped baby. & this isn’t an effort for him, he just automatically switches into caregiver mode when it’s needed. patrick doesn’t even have to ask.

i speak of this as growth, but i’m not saying that these are qualities that david suddenly developed because of schitt’s creek or because of patrick. the growth is in the vulnerability & the confidence to show these traits that have been there all along. david rose is nothing BUT love, he has SO MUCH love to give & is SO EAGER to give it, but because of how much hurt it has caused him in the past, he’s learned to switch it off. patrick gives him the security to finally love the way he was meant to, because he IS finally loved the way he was meant to be. it’s more than a throwaway joke when patrick refuses to return the “nice” compliment in 4x01: david rose may not always be a NICE person, but he is undoubtedly a GOOD person. but it is only through allowing himself to be vulnerable & to embrace joy that he is able to show it.

& yeah maybe i’m projecting a little, but dan has indicated plenty of times that we are meant to project. i may share david’s not-so-nice qualities, but i also share his good qualities, including his loyal & protective nature. not to get exceedingly personal (though my friends have already heard way too much about this), but before this show i had been through a shitty time being dumped by my fiancée & then losing all my friends in a really overblown & traumatic argument. after that i told myself i was toxic waste & wasn’t fit to be around other people; relationships only ever brought me hurt, so i figured i’d be better off turning off my need for companionship & just accepting that it wasn’t for me. i gave up on love, including for myself, & slipped into a nasty depression where i only left my house for school. i’m not saying sc cured me; i’m still clawing my way out of it, & i still don’t truly believe i’ll find love again (though i have found friendship again which i’m over the moon about). but through david rose, i have realized that i am worth loving & deserving of love. that’s why this show means a ridiculous amount to me.

so when people say they don’t see what patrick sees in david, i wonder what show they’ve been watching. patrick may be bold & capable, but david brings his humor & his passion & his LOVE, so much love, to the table. in david patrick sees someone who is smart, ambitious, creative, & talented, who just needs a little help gaining the confidence to put it all together. patrick does that for david with rose apothecary & then he does that for david in their relationship. they bring out the best in each other, not opposites but complementary pieces. patrick doesn’t have what david is missing, he just has a way to bring out what david has had inside him all along but has been too afraid to show.

& i guess that’s my essay on david rose. glad you liked the tags! :P

#david #david x patrick #chartreusebird #david rose

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pckarchives · 4 years

Text

beneath the cut , you’ll find random tidbits of info that i thought up at unholy hours of the night. took all day but tbh ..... this was therapy. i really said, “i’ll make my own damn self happy,” and it shows.

𝐏𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐄𝐍𝐓 𝐅𝐈𝐋𝐄 𝟎𝟎𝟎𝟏. › alicia marie levesque boyd-whitley.

► hobbies ➔ painting and decoration, primarily. for the most part, this is due to the nostalgia of doing it with her moms. she’s not awful at it, but she’s not van gogh levels of good, either. it’s just for fun, as all things should be. she’s also incredibly creative, so things like renovation ideas come easy to her. she did ballet for several years, but dropped it before she moved to beacon hills. ► social media handles ➔ she’s aleesha on just about everything. ► conventional or creative contact ids ➔ mostly conventional, with a series of emojis attached to every name. ► favorite color ➔ green. but sea foam-ish green. ► favorite video game ➔ animal crossing new horizons. she’s a simple bitch; she sees cute animals, she plays the damn game. ► favorite song ➔ style by taylor swift. ► favorite scent ➔ pumpkin spice! not to be totally cliché, but that scent is unbeatable. she has a million candles with that scent alone. ► favorite band/artist ➔ taylor swift, of course. ► favorite place to be ➔ nana’s house! ► favorite season ➔ winter! she had so much fun with lucy over this past winter and if that’s the way lucy acts every year for christmas, then alicia looks forward to it! ► favorite word ➔ squishy. ► favorite meme ➔ maybe so.gif ► if they were an animal ➔ cheetah! ► if they were a color ➔ beige. no longer the pure white she once was, but not the tar pit that she could have been, either. a beautiful mixture of purities and imperfections. ► if they were a vine/tiktok ➔ *going through the five stages of grief* HHHHHHHHH !!!!! someone just slid in my dms and *voice cracking* this is what they said.... *sobbing* gIRL.... *sniffle* HNNNNNN..... you should sell hoT DOGs.... ‘cause you know how to make a weiner stand. hNNNNNN.... HNNNNN!!!!!! ► if they were a taylor swift song ➔ shake it off. ► aesthetic ➔ paint-stained overalls, tear tracks covered in glitter and flower petals, crooked fingers snagging the last slice of pizza out the box, thick-framed glasses with the lens popped out, it’s for the aesthetic, sharpie’d converse kicks and open hearts doodled onto the palm of your hand –– darling girl, someone will really love you one day. ► motto ➔ “it really do be like that sometimes.” ► theme song ➔ lights up by harry styles.

𝐏𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐄𝐍𝐓 𝐅𝐈𝐋𝐄 𝟎𝟎𝟎𝟐. › amari rose kent.

► hobbies ➔ writing, mostly out of spite. in middle school, she had a meeting with the principal, during which he told her she was at risk of being expelled, due to how many teachers had issues with her. this was the same principal who told her she would never get anywhere, hanging off of tate’s coattails, so she wrote a 50-page paper in the span of one week, shaming the school for its discrimination and unethical practices when it came to students. instead of giving the paper to the principal, she submitted it to the board of education and got the man fired. not only did the essay make it onto local news, it also got her a scholarship to devenford prep; lucky, since tatum had already been offered a scholarship and was on the verge of turning it down because she wouldn’t go without amari. though she hasn’t spitefully written anything that huge since, she is still not afraid to thinkshame. also dabbles in poetry and collage-making. ► social media handles ➔ amari_rose on twitter and instagram. she surprisingly does not have a snapchat! ► conventional or creative contact ids ➔ conventional. at best, she’s giving nicknames. ► favorite color ➔ black. ► favorite video game ➔ she doesn’t play video games, so she doesn’t know. ► favorite song ➔ bad guy by billie eilish. ► favorite scent ➔ not to kinkshame, but.... leather. ► favorite band/artist ➔ billie eilish, she is not ashamed! ► favorite place to be ➔ wherever tate and owen are, honestly. ► favorite season ➔ summer. ► favorite word ➔ bullshit. ► favorite meme ➔ thA’TS MY OPINION !!!! ► if they were an animal ➔ panther. ► if they were a color ➔ silver. black is a hard color to obtain and she hardly comes close. she’s got all the darkness she doesn’t need, but the world put that in her. still, she’s close to light, too; close to breathing in sunlight. ► if they were a vine/tiktok ➔ to the mIDDLE SCHOOL TEACHER –– yes, YOU, you know who you are –– who said EYE would never be shit, LOOK AT ME NOW, WHORE ! LOOK AT ME NOW .... not shit. and HOW YOU LIKE IT ? *twerks belligerently* ► if they were a taylor swift song ➔ sad beautiful tragic. ► aesthetic ➔ messily chopped hair in the bathroom sink, tongue poked out to lick ketchup off of nimble fingers, rushed words in a lost diary, a bottle drifting out at sea, cigarette smoke and tequila-coated daydreams, harsh breaths in and out and in and out, bruised knuckles and bleeding lips, we’re not done here. ► motto ➔ “chin up, chest out.” ► theme song ➔ all the good girls go to hell by billie eilish. alternatively, kiwi by harry styles.

𝐏𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐄𝐍𝐓 𝐅𝐈𝐋𝐄 𝟎𝟎𝟎𝟑. › camden wesley layton lahey.

► hobbies ➔ he took up woodworking a few years back. therapy and whatnot. he likes making little birds and figurines out of wood, keeps a box of them in his nightstand. ► social media handles ➔ he’s not on social media! he’s old, leave him alone. ► conventional or creative contact ids ➔ very conventional. again, he’s old, leave him! ► favorite color ➔ grassy green. ► favorite video game ➔ he’s always going to be a sucker for mario party. that game is unfairly frustrating, but he would ride or die for it. ► favorite song ➔ i of the storm by of monsters and men. ► favorite scent ➔ peppermint! it used to make him sick, because it’s such a strong smell, but it’s now his absolute favorite thing in the world. ► favorite band/artist ➔ gorillaz. ► favorite place to be ➔ he honestly prefers closed spaces? tight spaces where he can see every corner, every entrance, every exit, every tile on the floor. whenever he starts panicking, he will sneak away to the nearest closet or something. ► favorite season ➔ spring. rebirth, babyyy. ► favorite word ➔ dammit. ► favorite meme ➔ it’s free real estate. ► if they were an animal ➔ german shepard. ► if they were a color ➔ light pink. this strange mix between the pure white of being a blank slate and the awful red of having spilled more blood than he can even remember. ► if they were a vine/tiktok ➔ AWWWWWWW 😍😍 awww, i’m gonna die alone 🤗🤗🤗 awww !!! i’m never gonna know what it’s like to be LOVED, AWWWWWW !!!! ► if they were a taylor swift song ➔ holy ground. ► aesthetic ➔ sweat-dotted skin, racing heart, jingling dog tags, checking the locks on the door once and then again and then again and once more just to be sure, hesitant hands and wet eyes, a smile that’s easy even when nothing else is, sunlight pouring in through a cracked window, a step closer to an answer, five steps back. ► motto ➔ “sure, jan.” ► theme song ➔ clint eastwood by gorillaz.

𝐏𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐄𝐍𝐓 𝐅𝐈𝐋𝐄 𝟎𝟎𝟎𝟒. › charles gerard argent.

► hobbies ➔ someone should tell him that working out isn’t a personality trait, but it really is his hobby. your depression can’t catch up to you, if you’re getting these gainz. ► social media handles ➔ he’s charliecharlie on everything, because he’s funny. ► conventional or creative contact ids ➔ it used to be creative, but man, that depression hit him hard and he switched to conventional. ► favorite color ➔ white. ► favorite video game ➔ fortnite, shut the fuck up, liam, he doesn’t want to hear it. ► favorite song ➔ perfect ruin by kwabs. ► favorite scent ➔ salt water. ► favorite band/artist ➔ clairo. ► favorite place to be ➔ at the beach. he takes frequent drives up to the closest beach, ► favorite season ➔ summer. beach time! all the time! ► favorite word ➔ yeet. ► favorite meme ➔ y E E T. ► if they were an animal ➔ raven. ► if they were a color ➔ a myriad of colors; there are so many facets to charlie and until he figures out exactly where he is in life, he’s going to keep creating a puddle of colors. ► if they were a vine/tiktok ➔ *dancing and singing to the tune of under the sea* ptsd 🤪 anxiety 🤪 crippling depression, there is no question, you should kill me !! let me be with HARAMBE 😤✊ i feel like shit every day ! i’m asking nicely, do it by drowning, under da sea 🌊🌊 ► if they were a taylor swift song ➔ getaway car. ► aesthetic ➔ that damnable water’s edge, the view from the top of a mountain, gnawed fingernails and scraped skin, 11:11 and back again, holstered knives and picturesque smiles, droplets of blood spilled into cold coffee, palm grazing the door to happiness but not quite opening it yet ––– another day and you might just make it. ► motto ➔ “que ce sang protège ceux qui ne peuvent se protéger.” ► theme song ➔ broken bones by kaleo.

𝐏𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐄𝐍𝐓 𝐅𝐈𝐋𝐄 𝟎𝟎𝟎𝟓. › cora vienna hale.

► hobbies ➔ lowkey has a love of mechanics. she doesn’t trust anyone else to repair her bike, so she learned how to do it herself. also learned how to fix cars, because scott is always messing his up. also still plays soccer when she has the time. ► social media handles ➔ she’s just corahale on everything. it’s more “professional” than what she had before. which was... a series of expletives that made lydia blush. ► conventional or creative contact ids ➔ conventional, unless she really hates you. then she can get creative. ► favorite color ➔ black. ► favorite video game ➔ detroit: become human. ► favorite song ➔ hold on just a little while longer from d:bh. luther snapped. ► favorite scent ➔ pinecones. ► favorite band/artist ➔ bryson tiller. ► favorite place to be ➔ the hale house. it feels good to be able to go there again and not be assaulted with all of the reminders of what she lost. ► favorite season ➔ winter. ► favorite word ➔ buttercup. look her in the eye and tell her it’s not the cutest word you’ve ever heard. exactly, you can’t. ► favorite meme ➔ looks into the camera like she’s on the office. ► if they were an animal ➔ lion. ► if they were a color ➔ gold. pure and beautiful; maybe not innocent, maybe not for everyone. but royal and bold and unrelenting. ► if they were a vine/tiktok ➔ sO... .i just went to starbucks and i got my iced coffee and i was standing in line and these little girls were looking at me. *sniff* and i was like, “okay, funny joke.” so i, um, i’m s–– i’m waiting for my coffee, uh, at starbucks, and these other little girls were just, like, LOOKING AT ME and they kept on staring and then this DAD kept on looking and then he kept on staring. and *uncomfortable laughter* ....... *more laughter* ..... *turns on music* *keeps laughing* *turns music off* what kind of sick fucking joke ? .... *uncomfortable shrugging* ...i EXIST ? *more laughter* ► if they were a taylor swift song ➔ clean. ► aesthetic ➔ a horrid red fire meets a river of blue, gasoline stains on faded tees, an unexpected smile on a rainy day, the way the forest breathes after a rainstorm, skintight dresses and haughty gazes, a smirk that rests for no one, the innocence of a white wolf in a prom dress. ► motto ➔ “flectere si nequeo superos, acheronta movebo.” ► theme song ➔ big god by florence and the machine. alt. the man by taylor swift.

𝐏𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐄𝐍𝐓 𝐅𝐈𝐋𝐄 𝟎𝟎𝟎𝟔. › daniel nahele mahealani.

► hobbies ➔ he no longer loves hacking or music, because... whew, high school killed everything he cared about. mostly sticks to being lydia’s dress up doll. ► social media handles ➔ he’s d-annyboy on all things, because it’s easy! ► conventional or creative contact ids ➔ conventional, unless he’s trying to hide something from jackson and lydia. lydia is not afraid to go through his phone, which he genuinely doesn’t mind, that’s why she knows all of his passwords and stuff. but he does not need her to know how many guys he’s fucked that she didn’t like, he’s not here for the lectures. ► favorite color ➔ red. ► favorite video game ➔ wii sports still outsells, he is not taking criticism or debate on this topic. ► favorite song ➔ magic in the hamptons by social house. ► favorite scent ➔ hot chocolate. ► favorite band/artist ➔ childish gambino. ► favorite place to be ➔ at the risk of being gay, wherever theo is. ► favorite season ➔ autumn. ► favorite word ➔ pack. he loves feeling loved, sue him. ► favorite meme ➔ kermit spreading his asshole. ► if they were an animal ➔ elephant. ► if they were a color ➔ orange; just on the cusp of happiness, but always holding back. ► if they were a vine/tiktok ➔ hEY GUYS, i’m just really co–– really confused, ‘cause what does fall have to do with fuckboys 🧐🤔 ‘cause I’VE been fucking boys .... EVERY MONTH, winter, fucking februarymarchaprilmay, june, december... dULY ... *someone taps on the trunk of the car* *looks back* ...that’s my dad *frantic zoom-in* ► if they were a taylor swift song ➔ afterglow. ► aesthetic ➔ scar-littered skin and callused hands, abandoned hobbies and hopes and dreams, all stashed to the back of the infamous closet, dimples cheeked and optimistic eyes, high school jerseys folded in the drawer, letterman jackets treated like sacrosanct, the memory of when things were simpler and the rain didn’t last so long. ► motto ➔ “this could be worse.” ► theme song ➔ clementine by halsey.

𝐏𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐄𝐍𝐓 𝐅𝐈𝐋𝐄 𝟎𝟎𝟎𝟕. › derek alexander hale.

► hobbies ➔ book collecting. as their lives continue to not make sense, he collects books on any and every odd ‘myth’ out there and just waits for the day it comes in handy. ► social media handles ➔ lydia has made him dhale on everything, because he’s boring. ► conventional or creative contact ids ➔ very conventional. he now has a lock on every app in his phone, because fiona and lydia will happily break into his phone to change his contacts, if he’s not careful. ► favorite color ➔ black. ► favorite video game ➔ he doesn’t often play video games, but he will school these youngsters in a game of yahtzee! ► favorite song ➔ when doves cry by prince. ► favorite scent ➔ something baking in the oven. ► favorite band/artist ➔ prince. no, he is not talking about it. ► favorite place to be ➔ the hale house, when the entire pack is there. close second is the loft, when everyone is there. he’ll complain until he’s blue in the face, but everyone knows he’s secretly weak for that. ► favorite season ➔ winter. ► favorite word ➔ no. ► favorite meme ➔ blinking white guy. ► if they were an animal ➔ i... a wolf. ► if they were a color ➔ tree bark brown; steady and stern and stable. ► if they were a vine/tiktok ➔ *standing at the bathroom door, glaring* if it breaks. one more time. don’t ––– shut your mouth. if it breaks while i’m sleeping, i will grab you by the neck and shove you down the shower drain. *continues to glare* ......... i’m going to take my shower now. *slowly and threateningly closes the door* ► if they were a taylor swift song ➔ daylight. ► aesthetic ➔ shattered handcuffs, ashes spread across the floor, delayed inhales and painful exhales, a pool of flowers at your feet ––– begin again. ► motto ➔ “no.” ► theme song ➔ sinnerman by nina simone.

𝐏𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐄𝐍𝐓 𝐅𝐈𝐋𝐄 𝟎𝟎𝟎𝟖. › dominic joseph kim.

► hobbies ➔ yoga, meditation, brewery, skin and haircare routines, and swimming! a king stays busy. ► social media handles ➔ he’s domkimi on snapchat, instagram and twitter, but he’s baddiebbarbietingz on reddit. he has a tumblr account, but he refuses to tell the pack what his username is. ► conventional or creative contact ids ➔ creative. feel free to look through his phone, but good fucking luck figuring out who is who. ► favorite color ➔ gold. ► favorite video game ➔ sims 4. he gets the chance to actually build a sustainable life? with a family? in a house? with cheat codes? and love? and aliens? and lovers who become plants? sign him the fuck up. ► favorite song ➔ would you mind by prettymuch. good form by nicki minaj is a close runner-up. ‘cause he do, in fact, be the baddie b barbie tingz banging body b, everybody be on his d, cause he gotta be in reality–– ► favorite scent ➔ pizza! if it’s not good for you, why does it smell so good? make it make sense. ► favorite band/artist ➔ prettymuch. ► favorite place to be ➔ tate’s lab! it’s where he and owen do most of their brewing, aside from their field trips to the greenhouse to get more ingredients. it’s basically where dominic does his best and calmest work. close second is his own apartment, because he does yoga in the living room each morning. ► favorite season ➔ summer. ► favorite word ➔ cecelia. ► favorite meme ➔ who said that.gif. ► if they were an animal ➔ a turtle! specifically, one of the turtles from finding nemo. ► if they were a color ➔ blue. calm and collected. ► if they were a vine/tiktok ➔ so i said i’m a switch on tiktok, right ? and now all these ladies are comin’ out of the woodwork like, “hey, i got a strap-on and a dog collar with your name on it ! ” 😳😳 and i’m like... you put my name on it ? 😍👉👈 /// alternatively: theee necklace my boyfriend bought me just came in the mail *zoom in on necklace* ....I’M my boyfriend ! i bought this for myself ! EEE *excited grin* ► if they were a taylor swift song ➔ style. ► aesthetic ➔ the push and pull of a tidal wave, a dash of eyeliner here and a bit of mascara there, collared shirts and wrinkled jeans, overrated pop over a bluetooth speaker, a fascination with milkshakes and musicals, a heart that beats out of rhythm but never misses a step. ► motto ➔ “the birds work for the bourgeoisie.” ► theme song ➔ good thing by zedd and kehlani.

𝐏𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐄𝐍𝐓 𝐅𝐈𝐋𝐄 𝟎𝟎𝟎𝟗. › elliot james aldridge.

► hobbies ➔ aside from his bathtub poetry and crime, he has revived his love of cooking and music. is masterful at the piano, guitar and harp, dabbles in cello and flute. he likes his music pretty, okay, sue him. ► social media handles ➔ redacted by the fcc. ► conventional or creative contact ids ➔ depends on how much he likes you! if you’re kosher, you get a creative name. if not... you get your own name. ► favorite color ➔ blood red. unironically. ► favorite video game ➔ he’s a poker man, but if he has to choose a video game, meet him in super smash brothers. ► favorite song ➔ say so by doja cat. ► favorite scent ➔ blood. ► favorite band/artist ➔ hozier. ► favorite place to be ➔ no offense, but the french quarter in new orleans. ► favorite season ➔ summer. ► favorite word ➔ self-care. ► favorite meme ➔ why would you say something so controversial, yet so brave? ► if they were an animal ➔ hyena. one of the asshole ones from lion king. ► if they were a color ➔ red. he’s not hiding that. ► if they were a vine/tiktok ➔ i’m not falling, i’m not falling, i’m not falling, i’m not falling, i’mnotfallingi’mnotfallingi’mnotfalling, i’m not f a l l i n g, i’m not FALLING, i’m not falling, i’m not falling, i’m not fALLING....... !! *deep breath* oKAY, i’m falling. /// alternative: the oNLY reason i have not destroyed the world is because i have not had ice cream in a while, i want some ice cream. but tRUST ME, when i get some ice cream ? your ass is grass and i’m the lawn mower ! ► if they were a taylor swift song ➔ ready for it? ► aesthetic ➔ a hoop of sterling silver, initials carved into dying trees, tempting eyes and a charming smile, cufflinks left on the nightstand, a prison cell and a funny story, top three buttons left undone, far too aware for his own damn good. ► motto ➔ "excuse me, i'm new in town and it gets worse." ► theme song ➔ sunlight by hozier.

𝐏𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐄𝐍𝐓 𝐅𝐈𝐋𝐄 𝟎𝟎𝟏𝟎. › erica juliet reyes.

► hobbies ➔ tracking deucalion and peter, for one thing, but that’s more of a job than anything else. does raving count as a hobby? she’s officially taken up rock climbing, by the way. a huge slap in the face to her epilepsy. ► social media handles ➔ she changes her handles frequently, because she’s indecisive, she can’t decide–– but she’s currently reyofsunshine on everything. shoutout to fiona. ► conventional or creative contact ids ➔ creative and often explicit! ► favorite color ➔ sand brown, don’t @ her. ► favorite video game ➔ until dawn. understand the palm of my hand, bitch.... jesus hot sauce christmas cake.... what were you tweeting, hashtag there’s a freaking ghost after us? your fave could never! ► favorite song ➔ hot girl bummer by blackbear. ► favorite scent ➔ lucy or fee’s baking. she’ll come home just for that. ► favorite band/artist ➔ blackbear. ► favorite place to be ➔ at a party. she’s very into raves. ► favorite season ➔ summer. ► favorite word ➔ motherfucker. ► favorite meme ➔ respect the drip, karen. ► if they were an animal ➔ a horse. enticingly beautiful but will also kill you. ► if they were a color ➔ gold. not as pure as cora’s gold, but twice as inviting. ► if they were a vine/tiktok ➔ all i’m gonna say is that i didn’t take ap classes in high school, escape the friend zone, graduate with honors, get cheated on, go to college, mentally deteriorate, become addicted to nicotine, sign a year lease, drop a sorority, fail chemistry and dye my hair purple, just to cry over the frat boy leaving me on read that smokes weed for breakfast, lunch and dinner 💁🏼 ► if they were a taylor swift song ➔ false god. ► aesthetic ➔ push-up bras covered in black lace, smeared lipstick against the bathroom mirror, jeans that leave nothing to the imagination, a wolf that lies in wait and fears no god, the epitome of poison. ► motto ➔ “meanwhile, back at the ranch...” ► theme song ➔ needed me by rihanna.

𝐏𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐄𝐍𝐓 𝐅𝐈𝐋𝐄 𝟎𝟎𝟏𝟏. › fiona evelyn porter.

► hobbies ➔ baking, pinterest, cheer, volleyball and softball. truly depends on the season. ► social media handles ➔ feezypeezyporter stays true to her brand. ► conventional or creative contact ids ➔ creative! her contact ids are indecipherable, the only people who can understand them are katie and cass. dom gave up. ► favorite color ➔ light green and light pink! ► favorite video game ➔ beat saber! ► favorite song ➔ love again by carly rae jepsen. ► favorite scent ➔ is.... is it gay to say cass? ► favorite band/artist ➔ carly rae jepsen. ► favorite place to be ➔ the loft! it really is her happiest place. alternatively, wherever cass is, ‘cause that’s home, babey! ► favorite season ➔ spring! baby sticks to her brand. ► favorite word ➔ braggadocio. how on EARTH is that a real word? ► favorite meme ➔ let me see what you have. a kNIFE! NO! ► if they were an animal ➔ cardinal. ► if they were a color ➔ green. the color of grass, covering everything, everything, everything. ► if they were a vine/tiktok ➔ *crying and sipping tea* it... is ver .... very b... bold of you to assume ............. ! *pained smile* /// alternatively: ONE OF YOU FAT BITCHES UNFOLLOWED ME !!! *manic laughter* i’m not mad, but like...... *climbs onto bathroom sink and leans in very close* what was the last straw ? ► if they were a taylor swift song ➔ me! ► aesthetic ➔ bare lips passing over green leaves, a lullaby to a struggling orchid, spanks and sweat drops and a desperate need for approval, a digital scale blinking red numbers back at you, pills of white and blue and yellow, maybe tomorrow you’ll be happy again. ► motto ➔ “team work makes the dream work!” ► theme song ➔ work this out from the high school musical 2 soundtrack.

𝐏𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐄𝐍𝐓 𝐅𝐈𝐋𝐄 𝟎𝟎𝟏𝟐. › hayden louisa romero.

► hobbies ➔ she has a love of sports. got into lacrosse before her imprisonment, though she was a little too fragile to play a real game. was a soccer star as a kid. also puts on glamour shows for the kids and the dogs, if they ask. ► social media handles ➔ she doesn’t have social media. imprisonment tingz. ► conventional or creative contact ids ➔ conventional. at best, you get an emoji or two at the end of your name. ► favorite color ➔ ocean blue. ► favorite video game ➔ will forever be weak for pokémon. ► favorite song ➔ 1985 by bowling for soup. timeless. ► favorite scent ➔ french vanilla. ► favorite band/artist ➔ she’s getting into melanie martinez. ► favorite place to be ➔ bias goes to being with the ito pack, but the preserve is pretty much paradise. ► favorite season ➔ winter. ► favorite word ➔ covenant. ► favorite meme ➔ and i oop––– ► if they were an animal ➔ manta ray. harmless babey. ► if they were a color ➔ prism clear. a maze of reflections, but so fucking breakable. ► if they were a vine/tiktok ➔ you mess with ME ? w ..... ! y...... ! *vague hand movements* you probably aren’t gonna experience any problems, because i’m afraid of confrontation !! /// alternative: *struggling to place lamp inside of another lamp* i JUST TOOK A TEN HOUR NAP ??? *panic* ► if they were a taylor swift song ➔ it’s nice to have a friend. ► aesthetic ➔ scars lifted among tanned skin, wary glances to read every room, crop tops floating above your belly, a lack of cares for a world that cares a little too much, marked skin and glossed lips, wanna make a deal with an angel? ► motto ➔ “my priority is me.” ► theme song ➔ i know by pink sweat$.

𝐏𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐄𝐍𝐓 𝐅𝐈𝐋𝐄 𝟎𝟎𝟏𝟑. › judith wendy mayer-argent.

► hobbies ➔ biking! she does it primarily for work, but she also does it for fun. also, huge gamer. and protestor. baby keeps busy. ► social media handles ➔ mayerjude. she can make so many jokes out of her own last name, don’t tempt her. ► conventional or creative contact ids ➔ creative! unless it’s someone important or authoritative. then they get their own name. ► favorite color ➔ sunshine yellow. ► favorite video game ➔ fornite. ► favorite song ➔ sunday candy by donnie trumpet and the social experiment. ► favorite scent ➔ cupcakes! the frosting! the delicacy! ► favorite band/artist ➔ maroon 5. ► favorite place to be ➔ in the middle of a protest, rally or march. if she’s not in action, then what is she doing? ► favorite season ➔ spring. ► favorite word ➔ audit. ► favorite meme ➔ surprised pikachu. ► if they were an animal ➔ dolphin. ► if they were a color ➔ sunset orange. no, i will not elaborate. ► if they were a vine/tiktok ➔ *walking down the street* so we were peer reviewing papers in one of my classes aaaand this girl goes, “you use some FANCY LANGUAGE ! ” and i was like, “what word ? ” and she was like, “perpetuate.” .........on GOD, we gon’ get you a dictionary. ► if they were a taylor swift song ➔ don’t blame me. ► aesthetic ➔ sunflowers pushing up from freshly dug graves, a smile away to keep the doctors away, sprained wrists wrapped in inappropriate laughter, bruised knuckles and black eyes, drink in hand, swinging your hips to that voicemail left by your toxic ex-boyfriend. ► motto ➔ “just keep swimming, just keep swimming, just keep swimming, swimming, swimming...” ► theme song ➔ modern love by david bowie.

𝐏𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐄𝐍𝐓 𝐅𝐈𝐋𝐄 𝟎𝟎𝟏𝟒. › kali kaira laghari.

► hobbies ➔ knitting. she has abandoned all of her self-care and therapy ideals, now knits and talks to ghosts. mind ya business. ► social media handles ➔ she’s not on social media, either. ► conventional or creative contact ids ➔ conventional. she has no times for games. ► favorite color ➔ red. she’s a scorpio, what do you expect? ► favorite video game ➔ not to be controversial, but she’ll take mortal kombat any day. ► favorite song ➔ nintendo game by alessia cara. ► favorite scent ➔ tea! ► favorite band/artist ➔ alessia cara. ► favorite place to be ➔ aside from wherever rohan is, she prefers the bookstore. confrontations aside, it’s a very small space, quiet and relaxing. ► favorite season ➔ winter. ► favorite word ➔ goddess. and yes, for exactly the reason you think. ► favorite meme ➔ as a treat. ► if they were an animal ➔ scorpion. ► if they were a color ➔ smoky grey. everything’s a little hazy with this one. ► if they were a vine/tiktok ➔ *staring at the food on the table, slowly losing her mind while everyone else argues over murder* *holds head in hands* *bangs hands on table repeatedly, screaming* WHAT ARE WE THANKFUL FOR !!! ► if they were a taylor swift song ➔ i did something bad. ► aesthetic ➔ cross-legged sitting in the middle of the road, waiting for a new thrill, fingertips grazing the harsh blade beneath your skirt, popcorn and wine with a man you could’ve loved if you were both a little less fucked up, a question that should never be answered, a world-view that should never be defiled –––– and you did it all. ► motto ➔ “i don’t need permission or advice; just help.” ► theme song ➔ simmer by hayley williams. you should see me in a crown by billie eilish.

𝐏𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐄𝐍𝐓 𝐅𝐈𝐋𝐄 𝟎𝟎𝟏𝟓. › kira fuyuko yukimura.

► hobbies ➔ she trains to keep herself calm. often talks with her fox nowadays; she wants to build trust. and given that kira is doing fuck all to deal with her issues, she needs someone to talk to her. she and her fox get along a lot better these days. she also runs, practices lacrosse maneuvers on her own and plays with lightbulbs. ► social media handles ➔ she’s a simple woman: kyuki. cut the fluff, cut the extraness. also, kyuki is what she’s named her fox. ► conventional or creative contact ids ➔ conventional, save for people who warrant a creative one. aka those whose names she doesn’t know. you would be surprised at how many there are. ► favorite color ➔ purple. ► favorite video game ➔ also a fan of animal crossing! ► favorite song ➔ ahead of myself by the ambassadors. ► favorite scent ➔ cinnamon. ► favorite band/artist ➔ the ambassadors. ► favorite place to be ➔ it’s dorky to say, but she likes being with her parents! they’re still in new york, so she doesn’t get that chance as much. however, her second favorite place to be is.... her bed. ► favorite season ➔ autumn. ► favorite word ➔ poppy. ► favorite meme ➔ guess i’ll die.png ► if they were an animal ➔ truly a fox. ► if they were a color ➔ steel blue. baby is electric. ► if they were a vine/tiktok ➔ i might be a BIG, DUMB, GAY BITCH ................ !! *smirks at camera* ► if they were a taylor swift song ➔ cruel summer. ► aesthetic ➔ a thunderstorm in your bedroom, leather gloves pulled over dainty hands, quick footwork and sly gazes, untied shoe laces dragging across the floor, leggings beneath skirts, quiet meditation before bed, sharp teeth poking into bruised lips. ► motto ➔ “yeah, this isn’t weird at all.” ► theme song ➔ fall in line by christina aguilera and demi lovato.

𝐏𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐄𝐍𝐓 𝐅𝐈𝐋𝐄 𝟎𝟎𝟏𝟔. › liam stephen dunbar.

► hobbies ➔ lacrosse no longer counts as a hobby, considering he made it his entire life. does training with allison count as a hobby? does texting gwen bad jokes count? ‘cause that’s all he does, my guy. ► social media handles ➔ he’s dvnbcr on everything. ► conventional or creative contact ids ➔ conventional, until fiona gets her hands on his phone and changes his ids again. ► favorite color ➔ red. ► favorite video game ➔ he’s that guy who plays all of the 2k nba games. like, he has to stan. ► favorite song ➔ i don’t care by fall out boy. ► favorite scent ➔ turf. he’s a loser, what do you expect? ► favorite band/artist ➔ fall out boy and kendrick lamar are tied. ► favorite place to be ➔ the lacrosse field. he does not stray from his brand. ► favorite season ➔ autumn. lax season! ► favorite word ➔ shit. fuck is a close runner-up. ► favorite meme ➔ i’ve won.... but at what cost? ► if they were an animal ➔ rhinoceros. ► if they were a color ➔ gray; that perfect intersection between white and black, good and bad, wolf and bomb. ► if they were a vine/tiktok ➔ *talking to his mom while she’s watching tv.* hey, mom? will you pause that? you know that guy i’m talking to is 6′4″? can’t wait to get my shit wrecked. so you are a bottom. ...wait. okay, i.... that’s not what you’re supposed to say! what am i supposed to say? don’t –– not that! *goes to sit next to her* i’m 👏 not 👏 a 👏 bottom 👏. bullshit. *confused look of betrayal* is this legal? have you ever done anything for anybody else? no, you’re a taker. /// alternatively: *trying to start a fire* hope so ! you gonna let the fire breathe or you gonna fuckin’ suffocate it ? i will end your goddamn short ass piece of shit useless life. ► if they were a taylor swift song ➔ this is why we can’t have nice things. ► aesthetic ➔ a rage that you can never quite tame, hand broken from too many punches, the green of fresh cut grass, car mileage piling up, miles and miles and miles left to go, bashful smiles and reddened skin. kid, you’re not nearly as bad as you think you are. ► motto ➔ “i blame scott.” ► theme song ➔ dr. whoever by aminé.

𝐏𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐄𝐍𝐓 𝐅𝐈𝐋𝐄 𝟎𝟎𝟏𝟕. › lydia charlene martin.

► hobbies ➔ sewing clothes, throwing parties, picking up new languages, ruling the world, saving this pack from falling apart, doing everything in this goddamn house! ► social media handles ➔ queenlydia, but who’s surprised? ► conventional or creative contact ids ➔ convention meets creativity in lydia’s phone. everyone has their first name, with a lord/lady/duke/duchess/etc. attached to it. jackson is the only one with king, obviously. you know you’re in trouble when she attaches peasant to your name. good luck climbing your way back up the ladder. ► favorite color ➔ pink. ► favorite video game ➔ not to be controversial, but dead by daylight is that bitch. ► favorite song ➔ honey by kesha. ► favorite scent ➔ strawberries. ► favorite band/artist ➔ kesha. ► favorite place to be ➔ in jackson’s arms, she is not taking that back. ► favorite season ➔ winter. ► favorite word ➔ throne and jackson are tied. ► favorite meme ➔ why are you booing me? i’m right! ► if they were an animal ➔ swan. ► if they were a color ➔ purple. royalty is not a game, kids. ► if they were a vine/tiktok ➔ not a vine or tiktok, but yes, it’s me 💅🏽 & you guys are mad about it ohmygod i make y’all feel that 🤢 well, i just wanted to pop up here & show y'all how i'm doing ! i'm doing great. i'm looking great, i'm feeling great, y'know 💇🏽 i'm obviously over here very booked & busy, while you bitches over here are still looking raggedy & not doing shit ! hahaha ! WOW ! 💁🏽 but anyway, um, i just wanted to let y'all know i'm not going anywhere. so talk your shit, you shitholes ! you can't defeat a bad bitch ! you just cannot do that ! i rise above that ! EW 🤮 so i just wanted to say hey ! & that i'm here to stayyy ! & you gon' be mad everydayyy ! HAHAHA ! SUCCESS ! ► if they were a taylor swift song ➔ paper rings. ► aesthetic ➔ a crown that fits just perfect, newly manicured nails, breakfasts at tiffany’s and on decorated balconies, the picture on the altar, damp curls and loose braids, tight dresses and sinful heels, brave but never fearless. ► motto ➔ “i’m lydia fucking martin.” ► theme song ➔ okay, okay by alessia cara.

𝐏𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐄𝐍𝐓 𝐅𝐈𝐋𝐄 𝟎𝟎𝟏𝟖. › scott lucas mccall.

► hobbies ➔ video games! he also likes helping the pack renovate whenever they decide to. though he has put fiona on a limit. after she redesigned her room five times in two weeks, he finally had to put his foot down. ► social media handles ➔ he is the most disorganized of the bunch. he’s scootermccall on snapchat, scottymccall on instagram, scotthewmccall on twitter because he’s weak for whatever fiona asks. it’s a mess, but he’s not changing. ► conventional or creative contact ids ➔ conventional, but with lots of emojis to show he cares. ► favorite color ➔ red. ► favorite video game ➔ he wants to say mario kart, because that’s his and lucy’s thing and, um, he’s in love with her. but other than that! life is strange. he hasn’t figured out how to win yet, but gosh dammit, that’s not going to stop him from trying. ► favorite song ➔ dna by lia marie johnson. ► favorite scent ➔ lucy’s perfume! ► favorite band/artist ➔ panic! at the disco. ► favorite place to be ➔ at the vet! he’s so happy when he’s around animals and it feels good to know that he’s helping these animals get better? ► favorite season ➔ summer. ► favorite word ➔ lucy. ► favorite meme ➔ i’ll be honest, i can’t read. ► if they were an animal ➔ golden retriever. ► if they were a color ➔ yellow. speaks for itself. ► if they were a vine/tiktok ➔ i had an essay that was due at 11:59. instead of being a smart, responsible student, i decided to wait until 11:40 .... to START my essay. i finished the essay on time. but the gag is............. it was a five-page essay. and i got it done in sixteen minutes. *dancing* they gon’ hate me regardless, that’s why i do what i do ► if they were a taylor swift song ➔ state of grace. ► aesthetic ➔ a lighthouse drawing in the lost, the open door of a sunken ship, wrongly buttoned plaid shirts, clumsy fingers and stumbling feet, saddened eyes that follow healing hands, the suspension of disbelief ––– whatever that means. ► motto ➔ “everything will work out!” ► theme song ➔ only the young by taylor swift.

𝐏𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐄𝐍𝐓 𝐅𝐈𝐋𝐄 𝟎𝟎𝟏𝟗. › tatum coretta bellfleur.

► hobbies ➔ nanotech mechanics! she learned as a way to make things for owen and amari that they couldn’t afford to buy. won a few competitions, got a few scholarships, got into programs that taught her how to do greater things than she’d ever imagined. took up baton twirling at devenford, but gave it up when she got to college. fiona is trying to convince her take it up again next year. ► social media handles ➔ she’s tatertot on everything, courtesy of one judith mayer. ► conventional or creative contact ids ➔ conventional. keep it simple, thanks. ► favorite color ➔ silver! it’s so pretty. ► favorite video game ➔ death stranding. no, she will not elaborate. ► favorite song ➔ mo money mo problems by notorious b.i.g. ► favorite scent ➔ flowers! ► favorite band/artist ➔ tupac. yes, she is that bitch. ► favorite place to be ➔ her lab. ► favorite season ➔ winter. ► favorite word ➔ free. ► favorite meme ➔ you know i had to do it to ‘em. ► if they were an animal ➔ doe. ► if they were a color ➔ white. no matter how much she hates being protected, she’s the picture of purity. ► if they were a vine/tiktok ➔ *sitting in front of a mirror.* maybe.......... i’m the problem 🤨 ► if they were a taylor swift song ➔ out of the woods. ► aesthetic ➔ a blanket of snow covering the grime and pain of yesterday, contained explosions and soft humming, tight ponytails breaking cheap rubber bands, tongue poking out the side of your mouth, the sun peeking through the slits of your blinds, wondering where you’ve been these last couple’a days. ► motto ➔ “i’ve lived through this before, i’ll live through it again.” ► theme song ➔ 100 years by florence and the machine.

#ii. study. › a. boyd .#ii. study. › a. kent .#ii. study. › c. argent .#ii. study. › c. hale .#ii. study. › c. lahey .#ii. study. › d. hale .#ii. study. › d. kim .#ii. study. › d. mahealani .#ii. study. › e. aldridge .#ii. study. › e. reyes .#ii. study. › f. porter .#ii. study. › h. romero .#ii. study. › j. mayer .#ii. study. › k. laghari .#ii. study. › k. yukimura .#ii. study. › l. dunbar .#ii. study. › l. martin .#ii. study. › s. mccall .#ii. study. › t. bellfleur .

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sapphic-robyn · 4 years

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why Quinn’s Lie is the best high school mcrp ever

in this essay I will convince everyone to watch Quinn’s Lie and stan the absolute living fuck out of it

if you haven’t watched Quinn’s Lie, I highly recommend it. if you don’t want spoilers, don’t read this until you’ve finished the season.

REASON 1:

Quinn herself is a beautiful main character.

Quinn is a character with more inner conflict and problems than any Aphmau character I’ve ever seen. the main thing I love about Quinn’s Lie is how realistic it is: every event that happens in the story can and absolutely could happen to any highschool kid. A lot of the same stuff has even happened to me.

Quinn is an amazing and relatable main character. she doesn’t feel like she fits in with her friends at all, as she likes to stay holed up in her room and play video games all day. whenever she talks about her interests, her friends playfully tease her about it, but they don’t know that their teases are actually hurting her. this has happened to me so many times, and I’m sure it’s happened to other people too.

Quinn finds solace in new friends who really do understand her, and she begins to make bad decisions because of it. she starts seeing Malachi, even though he makes her skip school and get in trouble. she’s making bad decisions, but can’t see past the fact that these people she’s hanging out with are making her happy. she’s willing to risk her wellbeing for a scrap of happiness.

REASON 2:

The friend conflict.

I touched on this in the last reason. Quinn doesn’t feel like she fits in with her friends because they judge and tease her about her interests.

This happens to me and probably a ton of people a lot. I really enjoy mcrp and several series of books, but my friends always make fun of me for liking stuff that should be “meant for kids.” I never tell them about my cosplays or anything like that. the only people I tell about that kind of stuff are a certain group of people on Instagram. sometimes it feels like you have to drop your old friends just to be happy. it isn’t always the case - you can always have friends in multiple circles - but balancing the two can be extremely stressful and make you anxious, like seen in Quinn’s Lie.

REASON 3:

It handles mental health beautifully.

Trigger warning!!!!! mention of suicide

Hayley has never come out and officially stated that Quinn was suicidal in episode 6 when she runs away, but it’s heavily inferred. When I first watched The scene where Quinn goes up to the rooftop after she runs out of school, I genuinely thought she was going to attempt to kill herself. Quinn has a panic attack after getting sent to the principal’s office and runs away, not bothering to tell her friends or Malachi where she is.

When Bowen finds her on the rooftop, she’s recounting all the reasons she’s a bad person. Bowen seems panicked, eager to get her to come with him. It’s all what would be found in a speech given to stop a person from killing themselves. Bowen gets forceful near the end, shouting in an effort to tell Quinn that she’s beautiful even without Malachi’s intervention.

Quinn is also able to have a very open and relaxed conversation with her mother about how she’s been feeling and about Bowen. Phoebe and Quinn have an extraordinary relationship, similar to best friends that can tell each other anything. Quinn spills out her feelings to her mother, something that is rarely seen in MCRP and real life alike. I’ve said this before, but Phoebe is a rockstar mom to have raised Quinn all by herself without Markus, and to raise her so well. it’s only until Quinn meets Malachi that the tight bond between Phoebe and Quinn starts to break.

REASON 4:

Believeable and well rounded characters.

Every single character in Quinn’s Lie has a consistent personality and understandable motives. here’s just a few for starters:

Kalea, after finding out that Asher was cheating on her, lashes out at Quinn. Usually, when characters are told they’re being cheated on, they break down and cry on the spot. Though Kalea after rashly and in the moment, this shows that she has a strong loyalty to Asher and it keeps theme with her personality. In fact, the fact that Kalea says that she wants to apologize to Quinn is amazing. Kalea admits what she did was wrong and wants to make it up to Quinn.

Teegan stands with Quinn through everything she goes through. Teegan is always looking out for Quinn, and will really do anything for her. Teegan is the first person Phoebe calls when Quinn goes missing. she immediately helps Quinn when she thinks she’s pregnant. The girl goes out of her way to go to a party - which, she isn’t comfortable with, mind you - and NOT hang out with the love of her life. She isn’t there for Wesley; she’s there for Quinn. Teegan is a definition of chicks before dicks. She does what’s best for Quinn, even if Quinn doesn’t listen.

Bowen is a stellar character and Prince Charming. Hayley has said that she doesn’t exactly like the ending of Quinn’s Lie because of how cliche it is, but we’re not talking about that. From the moment Bowen meets Quinn, he’s thinking ahead about her future if she began to hang out with his friends. He’s fully aware about how bad Malachi is and what a bad influence he is on her. Bowen tries his best to do what’s right for Quinn by not talking to her, even though it means hurting her feelings. He takes into stride Quinn’s feelings and future over his. Bowen is fully aware of his feelings for Quinn, but pushes them aside because he doesn’t want her getting hurt more than she already was.

These are just THREE of the characters from Quinn’s Lie. They get a lot better in Riverside U, too - Sierra is a feminist, Jocelyn is a bisexual/lesbian, and Faye, despite being an emo loner for all of high school, breaks out of her shell and becomes a cheerleader. Every single character in Quinn’s Lie is beautiful and well rounded. I could go on forever talking about how great each one is.

this concludes my late night ted talk about Quinn’s Lie. It’s a beautiful mcrp, and I highly recommend you watch it. 💕✨

#quinn’s lie #atmosphere #atmosphere minecraft roleplays

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rwbyconversations · 5 years

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Dante, and Vergil’s Impact on His Character Arc

I’ve been a long-time casual fan of the Devil May Cry games, though my skills at them are woefully inadequate. I’m more a fan of the crazy action that the series strives to provide in each of its entries and the wonderful misadventures Dante keeps getting dragged into, to say nothing of watching in awe high-level players pulling off combos so wild and energetic that they add years to my life expectancy.

But while it’s never been a main draw to the series, I feel like Devil May Cry is, at its best, a series that does manage to generate enrapturing characters and create fluid arcs across its games, and I feel that this comes across in what might go down as the greatest unintentional character arc in gaming, that of Dante.

While Dante in the first two games didn’t have much character, especially in DMC2, Devil May Cry 3 is when Dante’s characterization was finally solidified, not least of which because of the vocal talents of Reuben Langdon being added to Dante that gave him so much character across his future appearances. It’s not an exaggeration to say Dante is one of the most well-received and iconic protagonists in modern gaming, and I think that was solidifed thanks to the work of Itsuno, the Capcom team and Langdon in DMC3. What also helped was the introduction and solidification of Dante’s relationship with his brother, Vergil. This relationship has gone on to have major impacts on Dante’s character not just across DMC 4 and 5, but also in retrospect allows for Dante to develop an arc through DMCs 1, 2 and even the Animated Series.

As such, in this essay I’d like to look at Dante’s character across all five main Devil May Cry games, in particular focusing on his relationship with Vergil and how it impacted him across his life. Please note this essay will contain spoilers for Devil May Cry 5.

1) Pre-series and 3

Dante was born alongside his twin brother Vergil to Sparda and Eva, a demon who woke up to justice and sought to defend humanity from his demonic kin and a human woman who he fell in love with. The boys before they were eight were granted two halves of the Perfect Amulet, which when combined could open the path to the demon world. Sparda would die of unknown circumstances when the boys were young, and when Dante was 8, the family home was attacked by demons. Eva hid Dante away in a closet, telling him that if she died, he was to escape and assume a new identity. Eva went on to die trying to find Vergil (Dante assumes he is dead as well), with her death shaping Dante and Vergil into the men would become later in life- Dante would swear vengeance on all demons, while Vergil would develop the mindset that had he been more powerful, he could have prevented Eva’s death, which would cause him to seek out Sparda’s sword, Force Edge.

While growing up, Dante has become a freelance mercenary operating under the name of Tony Redgrave. Before the games, he spent time working with Enzo Ferino, who would pass along jobs to Dante, and Nell Goldstein, a gunsmith who made Dante’s signature pistols, Ebony and Ivory. Dante in a manga set right before 3 has learned that Vergil survived the attack on the Sparda Manor, and while he is initially ecstatic to learn of Vergil’s survival, the two quickly realize that they are both driven to accomplish goals that the other would get in the way of. Vergil defeats Dante in a duel, but lets him keep his half of the Perfect Amulet.

When 3 starts, it’s been a year since their first meeting. Dante is 19 and has nearly finished work on his new office, determined to follow the phrase “If you’re good at something don’t do it for free” to the logical conclusion in making demon hunting his job. After a mysterious man named Arkham offers Dante a chance to see Vergil at the top of a tower that arises from the earth named Temen-ni-gru, Dante sets out to confront Vergil and have an “interesting time” fighting the demons along the way. Vergil meanwhile, is drawing Dante to Temen-ni-gru to acquire Dante’s half of the Amulet and acquire the powers of Sparda hidden within, along with Sparda’s blade Force Edge.

Dante doesn’t take the whole affair seriously at all at first, joking all the way up to his first meeting with Vergil that this will all be a large party- and that the lack of food, drinks and women shows that Vergil knows how to throw a stinker of a party. Vergil takes the jokes in stride and even makes one in return, apologizing to Dante since he was so eager to see Dante, he “couldn’t concentrate on preparations for the bash.” Dante is quick to make a fight out of the conflict, drawing a gun on Vergil which... goes well for Dante.

It probably shows how bad Dante’s day is going when this isn’t even the first time today he’s been run through the chest.

Vergil slaughters Dante in their first fight, showing a complete lack of regard for any of Dante’s attacks. This attitude reflects into gameplay as well- Vergil is a challenging boss fight this early in the game and will defeat you if you drop your guard for even a second, forcing you to adapt to his fighting style and making it so you can’t just spam the same tricks over and over. There is a deliberate power imbalance between Dante and Vergil in their first fight, and Vergil even angrily calls Dante on refusing to tap into his demonic power. Dante’s blithe response that “I have no father,” and that he’s not tapping into his power just to spite Vergil only further enrages Vergil, and he wastes not time winning the battle by running Dante through- first with Yamato, then with Dante’s own sword Rebellion.

Vergil gives a look into his mindset here as he talks down to Dante. "Might controls everything. Without strength, you can't protect anything... Let alone yourself." It’s a look into Vergil’s psyche that shows that just like Dante, he never got over Eva’s death and likely why he’s never formed a serious relationship beyond a one-night-stand in Fortuna. It’s almost like Vergil’s afraid of opening up his heart in case it gets broken again. But yet it’s in him running Dante through that he forces the lesson onto Dante- that Dante will not be able to overcome the remaining trials in his way without tapping into the power granted through Sparda’s blood in his veins. And as such after reclaiming Rebellion, Dante forcibly triggers his Devil Trigger for the first time, embracing the demonic monster he had spent years rejecting.

This is Dante’s lowest point in the game- ironic given how this happens at the top of the tower. He has no allies, he’s lost his amulet and Vergil has made a mockery of him in their first duel. But slowly, Dante gets back up and steels himself for round 2, punching a pillar in frustration only to watch as his energy causes it to explode from the force. And upon realizing the power he now wields, Dante cuts loose in a glorious cutscene showing his drive and refusal to give in as he freefalls down the side of the tower and defeats a swarm of enemies, all while Devils Never Cry kicks into high gear.

Bless me with your gift of light Righteous cause on judgment night Feel the sorrow the light has swallowed Feel the freedom like no tomorrow

From this point on, DMC3 shifts focus and becomes a race between Dante and Vergil to see who can uncover the secrets of the tower and unlock Sparda’s power first, both unaware that they and Lady, a human woman trying to hunt down her father, that Arkham is playing everyone so that he can swoop in and steal Sparda’s power at the last second.

Dante and Vergil fight again fight after Vergil has unlocked the last barrier holding back Sparda’s power. Along the way Dante slowly comes to terms with his demonic heritage and learns to embrace its power more, all while Vergil rejects his humanity, believing that true strength will come from the power of a demon. What Vergil doesn’t know however is that Devil May Cry’s humanity possess a power that no demon could ever dream of possessing- something Vergil learns the hard way in 3 and 5, while Dante rubs it in Agnus’s face in 4. Devil May Cry 1 director Hideki Kamiya would eventually confirm on Twitter that what humans possess is simple- heart. The heart to get back up after a crippling defeat and prepare for round 2, or to simply never accept defeat, is in fact one of Dante’s greatest weapons, greater even than his sword, guns or electric bat guitar.

... Man Devil May Cry 3 gets weird and I love it.

It’s through using his heart along with his demonic powers that Dante is able to grow as a fighter, represented in-game as the player not just upgrading Dante’s styles and weapons, but becoming better with the tools provided and taking the time to become more stylish and visually exciting with each new fight being an opportunity to pull of a new stylish combo.

Dante’s second battle with Vergil occurs in the basement of the tower, with the fight ending in a draw as before either can strike a finishing blow, Lady and subsequently Arkham intervene in the fight, Arkham having planned for Dante and Vergil to wear themselves out fighting each other so that neither of them had the power to stop him from stealing Sparda’s power for himself. And despite being a lowly human, Arkham is able to play Dante, Lady and Vergil like chess pieces and take the power of Sparda for himself, before the power mutates him into a giant blob monster that threatens the world.

Vergil disappears for much of the rest of the game as Dante races after Arkham to stop him, defeating several more demons within and absorbing their energy to create more Devil Arms (alongside taking Beowulf off Vergil after he dropped it). Dante initially fights Arkham alone, but even as a giant blob Arkham proves a significant threat to Dante until Vergil offers some backup. Putting aside their mutual differences, the two brothers decide to honor their father by beating the ever-living crap out of the man who stole his power, delivering the finishing blow through a combined Ebony and Ivory shot while saying Dante’s signature line.

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A moment so good I had to include it twice

It’s also notable that this is the one time Vergil gets over his aversion to firearms-

I’m sorry DID I STUTTER

After Arkham is defeated and sent away for Lady to deliver the killing blow on, there’s a moment of silence between Dante and Vergil. The Jackpot scene and its immediate aftermath really does sum up a lot of their relationship- they may have been fighting almost every time we’ve seen them thus fat, and there is genuine aminosity between the two, but Dante and Vergil are ultimately just brothers who ultimately respect each other and might have even been more permanent allies were it not for their ideological differences... differences which directly cause the game’s final boss.

Vergil dives in after the Perfect Amulet, landing on the edge of the Demon World itself with Dante in hot pursuit. Vergil bluntly orders Dante to give him his half of the amulet, and when Dante refuses to and challenges Vergil on what he’ll do with the power, Vergil snaps at him, charging with his newly acquired Force Edge. Dante has none of it, catching the sword and insisting that his soul is saying it wants to stop Vergil. It’s disheartening that both brothers come to blows so soon after their effective teamup, but neither of them will compromise on their goals.

Vergil’s final fight is a perfect climax of the game, both emotionally and mechanically. As Dante and Vergil keep fighting, two facts remain the same- the location of the fight is geographically lower and lower each time, and Dante gets better with each bout, losing in the first round, drawing with Vergil in the second and in the third, after having embraced Sparda’s heritage, coming ahead of Vergil and winning conclusively. It’s still a difficult bout for the player but after all their time in this hellish night with Dante, you’ve mastered the game and are able to meet Vergil beat for beat.

Dante wins the final clash of swords, with Vergil stubbornly refusing to accept defeat and hand over his half of the amulet. He encourages Dante to leave him in the Demon World, before letting himself fall of the side in an effective suicide. Dante tries to reach out to him, but Vergil slashes open his hand as he falls, bringing his half of the amulet with him. Dante doesn’t say a word for the rest of the scene, but his face and body language betray how emotionally compromised he’s become by Vergil’s loss. He glumly brings Force Edge with him to the surface and meets up with Lady, whose attempts to lift Dante’s spirits coin the name of the series- “Maybe somewhere out there, even a devil may cry when he loses a love one.” Even though it does lift Dante’s spirits and gives him a name for his shop, Vergil’s suicide haunts Dante for years, and the first signs of it are present even in the ending of DMC3, where his final taunt before the credtis fight scene sounds like he’s trying to convince himself that he’s ready to take everything the world can throw at him.

In a post-credits scene, Vergil squares off against DMC1′s main villain Mundus. Vergil cockily decides to take him on, but the results of the battle were already known in DMC1, where Dante fights Vergil as Nelo Angelo.

2) DMC 1, 2 and Animated Series- Depressed Dante

In advance, I am going to say this: obviously enough, DMC 1 and 2 were written before DMC 3 and any attempts I make at retroactively making 3′s narrative tie into both of them is weakened as a consequence as it falls into headcanons more often then not. Being blunt, DMC 1 and 2 didn’t have as much focus on story as 3 so any attempts I make to connect their stories might come off as trying to connect threads while wearing cooking gloves. Just keep that in mind for this part barring anything I say on the anime.

Nine years after the Temen-Ni-Gru incident, Dante has set up Devil May Cry and takes extermination jobs for anyone who calls his shop with the elusive password. While he’s making dry quips and nonchalantly dealing with the threats he faces while fighting Mundus, he’s notably less energetic compared to his younger self. Dante is more somber and reflective almost as a direct consequence of his dealings with Vergil, and while he’s still cracking wise when he confronts the demons Mundus has scattered around the island, he’s far less talkative than he was. One of his more talkative moments comes after Mundus kills Griffon, who had genuinely earned Dante’s respect through their repeated encounters across the game. Dante is quite livid at Mundus killing one of his own soldiers in such a callous way, as he tells Trish:

“Mundus... His heinous ways make me sick; killing his own like they were nothing. He's the one that took the life of my mother for sure. My mother always used to tell me that my father was a man who fought for the weak. He had courage and a righteous heart. In the name of my father I will kill Mundus!"

Dante has an unexpected family reunion when he fights Vergil, covered in armor, as Nelo Angelo several times over the story. Nelo Angelo provides some of the tougher fights in DMC1, managing to disarm Dante during their first bout and neatly delivering a killing blow before Nelo spots Dante’s amulet and retreats, as if Vergil refuses to give Mundus the satisfaction of having Vergil kill Dante for him. Dante admits grudging respect for Nelo Angelo, saying he didn’t expect to find anyone with “guts and honor” in the castle.

Their second battle sees Nelo removing his helmet, revealing Vergil’s corrupted visage underneath. Despite the enhancement of the armor, Vergil loses again to Dante, this time seemingly dying as he explodes in a flash of lightning, leaving nothing but Vergil’s half of the Perfect Amulet. Dante stops to recollect a childhood memory of himself and Vergil wanting cake for their birthday, before combining the amulets and using it to reawaken Sparda and have it resume its true power.

The rest of DMC 1 has Dante suffer from Trish’s betrayal and subsequent redemption, but while he ends the game on a victorious note after having beaten Mundus and saved Trish with a variation of Lady’s line to him, he’s also despondent at the loss of Vergil yet again, which leads to Dante being more sullen in the animated series and DMC2, which both take place five years later when Dante is 33.

Dante’s characterization in the DMC Animated Series is often considered divisive due to him being rather mellow and sullen compared to his more distinctive appearances, especially since Reuben actually provided Dante’s voice under a false name. However, intentionally or not, Dante’s characterization in the anime bears a lot of symptoms consistent with depression: Dante is even more of a slob than normal, frequently is tired and sleeps all day, eats only comfort food (strawberry sundaes in the show) and only ever comes alive while working. But since Dante is so powerful in the anime, he’s lucky if a fight lasts more than a few seconds. When looking at the anime in the context of DMCs 1 and 3, it gives the impression that Dante is just worn down after losing Vergil in 3, only to then kill him in 1. This leaves Dante as the last member of his bloodline, which drags him down. Fortunately, Dante has Lady and Trish to keep dragging him out of bed and getting him to care, and he seems to slowly be recovering from his depression by the time of DMC2.

Devil May Cry 2 has no real plot and Dante has been stripped of almost all the characterization in 1 and 3 which made him such an iconic character. Like nearly everything else wrong with DMC 2, this largely comes down to the disaster of a development cycle that the game had- director Hideaki Itsuno admitted in an art book that when he was brought on to direct DMC 2, he was replacing a director who had botched the project so hard that Itsuno only had four months to essentially develop the entire game, including the script. As such, Dante’s character is very flat. Barring one line (“King? Here’s your crown.”), Dante has no memorable quips or dialogue, with most of the development being handed off to Lucia instead. Dante’s one significant character trait is his habit of flipping a coin to choose events for him, a trait that has rarely been acknowledged since. While this Dante does fall into the line of thinking we’ve used so far, that Dante is suffering from depression for much of his late 20s and early 30s, it’s hard to even consider this as a possibility when Dante’s stoic nature is just because of a rushed script and weak writing, and it feels almost dirty to try and tie in the depression theory to this.

Thankfully, Dante’s character would like much of the series get an extended redemption thanks to DMC3, but the next entry in the timeline put him back on track..

3) DMC 4 and the reclamation of hope

For a long time, DMC 2 was the final point in the timeline, in part because of Capcom’s shame for the game being so great that they are actively reluctant to acknowledge the existence of DMC2. Before DMC 5 released, Executive Producer Matt Walker confirmed that the timeline had been changed from 3-1-4-2 to 3-1-2-4, and one of the consequences of this was that Dante’s character arc began to flow naturally.

While there are several scenes in DMC4 set before the game begins, most notably the explanation of why Trish gave the Order Sparda’s sword which also leads into the intro cutscene for Trish and Lady’s route in Special Edition, a long-standing fan theory is that Dante begins DMC4 with some vestiges of his Anime/2 depression remaining, hence why he fails to exhibit any of his typical stylish moves during his assassination attempt on Sanctus- he just jumps down the window and shoots him point-blank in the head. It’s only when Nero attacks him and subsequently lasts longer than most of the Order guards that Dante begins to treat the fight with his usual charm. It’s made clear that he’s not taking the battle against Nero too seriously, and it’s evident that if Dante wanted he could turn Nero into a smear on the pavement in a heartbeat. But the Devil Bringer, along with Nero’s refusal to let Dante get away, impress Dante enough to let Nero go, which leads to Nero spending much of his route hunting Dante down until the two finally meet again and have a rematch at Fortuna Castle.

Even with his new upgrades, including Vergil’s sword Yamato and his new Devil Trigger, Nero is barely able to keep up with Dante, who in gameplay is a nightmare to fight due to having access to all four of his DMC 3 styles at will and being played by an AI seemingly designed to wreck your day. To little surprise, Nero loses and is disarmed of Yamato. Dante is eager to reclaim Yamato, telling Nero “It belongs in the family,” but chooses to let Nero keep hold of Yamato for now due to having become less hot-headed and wanting to use the weapon to help save Kyrie. However, Sanctus is revealed to have been revived and traps Nero in the Savior (an artificial demon the Order created that requires Sparda’s blood and sword) before it marches on Fortuna City with Yamato. Dante races back through the route Nero took, determined to reclaim Yamato and destroy the Savior.

Dante doesn’t develop much during his playable segment of the game, barring the new Devil Arm cutscenes confirming that he is back to his usual jovial and eccentric self. Much like with Nero, Dante’s power means that the threat of the Savior is quite small in the grand scheme- Dante can defeat it in a head to head fight and the story doesn’t try to convince you that this threat can top the one presented by Mundus. Dante eventually returns to Fortuna and after confronting Agnus in one of the greatest cutscenes in human history, reclaims his brother’s sword and then frees Nero. Between the two of them tag-teaming the Savior and Sanctus from the inside and out, Dante and Nero bring a stop to the Order’s plans and destroy the Savior, Dante reclaiming his father’s sword.

With that, Dante leaves, job complete. Nero confusedly asks if Dante wants Yamato back, but Dante blithely tells him to keep it, confident in Nero’s abilities now as a Devil Hunter.

Nero: "What...? I thought this meant a lot to you...?" Dante: "That's the only kind of gift worth giving. I want to entrust it to you, and so I am. What you do from here is your call."

Deadly Fortune (the Japanese only DMC 4 novelization) and DMC 5 would go on to confirm that Dante allowed Nero to set up a new branch of Devil May Cry in Fortuna. Nero asks Dante if they’ll meet again, but Dante only shoots a wave over his shoulder. Little did they know that meeting again would take eleven long years, before they got to join up back together for more hijinks.

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By the end of DMC4, Dante has finally gotten over the trauma and baggage he’s been carrying since Vergil’s death. Seeing the new generation of demon hunters in Nero has reignited the spark that laid dormant inside of him for so long. Dante’s 38 by the time of DMC4, meaning he carried those dark emotions inside him for over half his life, but with Nero wielding Yamato, Dante has finally become able to let go and become the cool uncle/mentor figure Nero needs.

4) DMC 5- Acceptance and peace

... so of course just five short years later, everything goes right back to hell for Dante. He’s still not great at managing the financial side of his business, but the arrival of a mysterious young man named V with a promised contract that will provide cash up front gives Dante all the drive he needs to get into gear to confront Urizen. But unfortunately, Urizen proves far stronger than anyone feared, and he effortlessly defeats Dante, Trish, Lady and a late to the party Nero who lost his Devil Bringer two weeks prior. Dante, desperate, breaks out his Devil Trigger and orders V to get Nero out of there, deriding Nero as “dead weight.” Soon after, Urizen beats Dante out of Devil Trigger and shatters Rebellion, sending him flying out of the Qliphoth and into a coma for a month.

V eventually finds Dante by the ruins of an old manor, the demons having not found him because of the Devil Arm Sparda having hidden Dante’s presence. After a little fakeout stab, Dante is restored to fighting form and immediately goes to get ready for Round 2 with Urizen, all while Nero, now armed with the Devil Breakers, desperately tries to kill Urizen himself. Dante first gets himself some sick wheels and makes for the ruins of the Sparda Manor where his life got flipped on its head over thirty years prior.

Somehow, this isn’t the craziest weapon in the game.

After lamenting on how he always seems to get a sword through the gut, Dante impales himself on the Rebellion like Virgil did back on the top of Temen-Ni-Gru. And just like then, Dante unlocks a new level to his demonic abilities, gaining the Sin Devil Trigger and a new Devil Arm, the Dante. Armed and ready, Dante makes for Urizen to show him whats what. While Urizen makes a hasty retreat, he is able to supercharge himself with the Qliphoth fruit before Dante arrives, but even this increase in power isn’t enough to stop Dante, because not only has he gained more power through Sin Devil Trigger, but Urizen, just like Vergil, has failed to learn the important lesson of humanity in Devil May Cry.

Side-note, this is the greatest cutscene in the history of video games. I don’t really have any way to tie the Faust Hat to this analysis but I thought we all needed a reminder that this was a glorious thing.

Dante, unlike the audience, has always been aware that Urizen was Vergil or at least his demonic half. Urizen is literally Vergil's ambition and greed manifested into a malevolent, power-hungry demon, and much like Vergil himself, Urizen fails to realize that through sacrificing his human half, he’s lost the true power within himself. It takes until Dante lays the smackdown on Urizen even after being supercharged with the Qliphoth root. In Urizen’s eyes, Dante hasn’t sacrificed anything to achieve this power and fights Urizen simply because it’s the right thing to do, and that desire to protect others

Urizen: How... How are you so powerful?! You never lost anything! Dante: It's not about loss... Strength is a choice! Fighting like hell to protect what matters! You threw away everything you ever had! No wonder you have no true power! Urizen: Danteeeeee!

Ultimately, Dante defeats Urizen and leaves him a dying husk on the ground. But before he can deliver the killing blow, V tricks Dante into letting him finish the job, allowing him to merge with Urizen and become Vergil, brought back from the dead.

All of the main characters in DMC5 have their own subtitles along with their name when introduced, and Vergil’s is perfectly fitting from a meta angle- he was Dante’s first major opponent in DMC3, and now here he is at the end of the Sons of Sparda saga, the final boss for the last hours of the game.

Dante immediately freaks out at Vergil’s return and goes to kill him, but due to expending so much energy on Urizen, Vergil is able to push him back with ease, telling him to heal his wounds before trying to face him. Dante stubbornly begins climbing back up the Qliphoth, even as Nero tries to dissuade him until Dante tells Nero the truth that Vergil is his father, before pressing on alone and leaving Nero to escape the tree. Dante and Vergil both never even consider the possibility of not fighting to the death. The last time they tried to talk things out at the edge of the Demon world, both Dante and Vergil proved their ideologies were just too different for them to peacefully co-exist. The tragedy of DMC 3′s climax stretches on more than twenty years later for these two, and neither are of the mindset that this can end in any way that’s not one of the twins standing over the other’s body. .

On the way, Dante finds V’s three Summons- Griffon, Shadow and Nightmare- who reveal themselves to be the manifestations of Vergil’s traumatic memories from his time as Nelo Angelo. The familiars force a fight against Dante, warning him that if he can’t beat them he doesn’t stand a chance against Vergil. Though Dante makes no note of it, eliminating the familiars has likely ensured Vergil will be able to live without the trauma from his time under Mundus. Dante is particularly respectful to Griffon, the servant of Mundus who he never got to properly defeat in battle and the one he almost respected. It feels like Dante finally being allowed to have the fair fight with Griffon that the demon deserved more than a decade prior.

Ultimately, Dante makes his way to the top, with both the brothers pausing for a moment to ponder how many times they’ve exchanged blows. Dante even admits that them fighting is the only memories of the two that he can remember since they were children. Ultimately they draw their weapons, and begin their final clash.

It’s ultimately a desperate knockout brawl, with both fighters giving it their all and using everything and anything they’ve learned over the years to gain an edge in the fight, but it ends on a draw with both stopping to catch their breath after a fight that canonically goes on for more than twenty minutes. Vergil finally realizes that Nero is his son. The two stop for a second, Dante gently ribbing Vergil for being young once as well, but even then it loops back around to their deathmatch. Despite both being clearly exhausted, they fire up their Devil Triggers and prepare for another charge, only to be interrupted by a new demon- Nero, having gained the strength to activate his own Devil Trigger and regrow his lost arm, now determined to stop the two twins from killing each other once and for all.

Throughout DMC5, starting with the “Dead Weight” line, Dante has had a habit of disrespecting Nero. Granted, Dante is canonically stronger, but he bluntly tells Nero multiple times that he effectively doesn’t care what Nero thinks of a situation, Dante will do it his way. Yet again he tries to assert dominance over Nero, but this time Nero, now armed with a new Devil Trigger and at the peak of his strength while Dante and Vergil are both exhausted, bitch slaps Dante out of the fight and promises to make Vergil submit to him. Vergil in turn doesn’t take Nero seriously, but promises him a fight when Nero bluntly repeats that neither of the brothers are dying today. What follows is an extended curb stomp as Nero pays Vergil back dividends for ripping off his arm at the start of the game. While Vergil normally wouldn’t be so easily defeated by Nero, his exhaustion from fighting Dante and expending so much energy on maintaining his Devil Trigger have drained him of the stamina he needs and as such, Nero canonically dominates the fight.

This, Ninja Theory, is how you make your protagonist screaming “Fuck you!” look insanely cool and not pathetic

Nero makes Vergil take a knee, but the situation changes from the immediate battle. Dante and Vergil resolve to descend into the Underworld to cut the Qliphoth's roots. When Nero counters that this potentially leaves the two stranded, Dante quietly tells Nero that it’s because of him that they can make this risk. With Nero on this side of the barrier ready to protect humanity, Dante is comfortable potentially trapping himself on the other side of the dimensional border with Vergil. And as such, the two brothers fly into the Underworld and destroy the Qliphoth once and for all, leaving Nero, Lady and Trish to safeguard the human world.

When we next see Dante and Vergil, they’re in the depths of the Underworld. Just like when Vergil lost to Dante in DMC3, he asks Dante to go back to the human world- Vergil wants to atone for Urizen’s sins and that involves ensuring the destruction of the tree. But Dante doesn’t want to leave his brother alone this time, noting that someone needs to keep an eye on Vergil- if only to ensure a repeat of the Nelo Angelo incident doesn’t happen. As Qliphoth tree roots begin to form around Dante and Vergil, we play as Dante one final time in a playable credits sequence.

When we cut back to Dante and Vergil for the final scene, they’re locked in yet another battle. But this time, it’s a friendly spar with no malice or aminosity between them barring normal brotherly bickering. Dante even quips that he’s one up after winning while Vergil counters that Dante miscounted and that they’re even. As they ready for another round, a new wave of demons emerge and without breaking stride, the two begin clearing house. As Vergil snarls at him not to say it, Dante shoots the camera a triumphant grin before uttering his catchphrase one last time as the game concludes.

“Jackpot!”

5) Conclusion- Devils Never Cry

While it likely will never be listed as a primary reason for the character’s critical acclaim in favor of his charm or bombastic personality, Dante’s character arc across the Devil May Cry series is an overall well-written arc of a character, and this is complemented extraordinarily well by Vergil serving as his rival in two of the games. Despite only physically appearing in 60% of the numbered games canonically, Vergil has a huge role on Dante’s life, starting when they were barely children before traumatic circumstances separated them. Then when they met on the tower when they were just 19, Vergil humiliated Dante and forced him to embrace his demonic heritage so he could keep up with Vergil in a straight fight. Ultimately though, while also maturing as a person, Dante not only fought Vergil to a standstill but went on to defeat him in a straight fight. But Vergil’s deaht would haunt Dante for years to come, and that misery would intensify upon fighting and killing Nelo Angelo, driving Dante into a deep depression that lasted years until Nero reignited the spark in Dante and brought him back from the brink. Through Nero, Dante regained his purpose and drive, and when Vergil threatened to come back as Urizen and then as himself, Dante was swift to try and destroy this at the root- Vergil had upended his life and mental state twice already and he refused to let it happen a third time. It took Nero moving past his own trauma and literally bitch-slapping sense into him for Dante and Vergil to begin to reconcile, and by the time of their final scene, the two brothers are now finally united as a demon-slaying team that will last the ages. Itsuno not only saved Devil May Cry (from himself, but again, four months) after DMC 2, but retroactively tied the first two games together with the third and subsequent games to give Dante a (largely) coherent character arc across the series. For that, Itsuno and writing team, along with Reuben Langdom, deserve massive respect for accomplishing what many wouldn’t consider doing for a “dumb Japanese action game.” To say nothing of the work done to turn Vergil from a one-note villain in DMC 1 to one of the greatest rival characters in gaming, and particular praise must be given to Dan Southworth for his work as the character over the last decade. Character content like this is what will ensure that Devil May Cry as a series stays relevant not just because of its near-perfect gameplay, but its surprisingly touching character moments between these goofballs that makes me always eager for more adventures in this universe.

Thank you for reading.

(also who expected the Subhuman redux to be so good? All it took was getting rid of the kid-touching creep and getting an actual musician in the book, who’d have thunk it)

#devil may cry #dante devil may cry #vergil devil may cry #devil may cry analysis #devil may cry 5 #dante #vergil #nero #nero devil may cry #devil may cry 2 #devil may cry 3 #devil may cry 4 #devil may cry the animated series #reuben langdon #dan southworth #hideaki itsuno

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jobrosupdates · 5 years

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Nowstalgia: Jonas Brothers' Second Coming

Story by Jael Goldfine / Photography by Robin Harper / Styling by Britt McCamey

On a conference call, the morning after the Met Gala, Nick Jonas divides his and his brothers' career in two: before and after Disney Channel first aired the "Year 3000" music video in 2007. Before "things weren't working," afterwards "it all came together." In the infamous clip, a 15-year-old Nick, 18-year-old Joe and 20-year-old Kevin, dressed in Converse and graphic tees (Joe in camouflage, Nick and Kevin in Ed Hardy) fall into a portal in a suburban living room, shimmering with CGI sparkles like an Instagram filter. They emerge enthused to find that, among other developments, in the future they are rock stars wearing matching suits, with a pile of magazine covers and a new album that outsold Kelly Clarkson.

We are on the phone, along with Joe and Kevin, to talk about The Jonas Brothers' surprise reunion and their first album in six years, Happiness Begins. Much like the rest of the world, however, I am fascinated by their past.

Like The Jonas Brothers' second coming, "Year 3000" is an intoxicating orgy of nostalgia for anyone who lived through their genesis: malls were in their heyday, technology was magical, not terrifying, Instagram was a prototype on a jewel-colored Mac desktop in Silicon Valley, and Kelly Clarkson was the gold standard for album sales. The prophetic song feels self-congratulatory now, but at the time, it represented a fantasy. The Jonas Brothers didn't know that they'd spend much of their adolescence in matching suits, or that their next album would, indeed, crush Clarkson's corresponding My December in sales that year.

Without that video — a cover of British pop-punk band Busted, whose original lyrics envisioned a future full of triple-breasted women, instead of cute space girls with Star Wars buns — we might never have met The Jonas Brothers. Their debut album It's About Time had middled out on Columbia (it would later become a fan favorite), while they spent a couple years opening for their teen idol forbearers: Jesse McCartney, the Backstreet Boys, Jump5 and The Cheetah Girls. It was only after "Year 3000" went "viral" (in the way things did in 2007, conducted via hallway chatter and YouTube-binging sleepovers, alongside clips like "Salad Fingers," Shoes" and "Charlie Bit Me") that Disney realized Nick, Joe and Kevin, with their unthreatening good looks, nuclear New Jersey normalness, and formidable skills with guitars and microphones, were the perfect raw material for their cottage industry of boys and girls next door.

They released their breakout second album The Jonas Brothers on Disney's label, Hollywood Records later that year. Quickly, they saturated the Disney multiverse and the lives of early-to-mid 2000's suburban youth. They made a guest appearance on Hannah Montana that broke cable records. Their songs could be heard in Aquamarine, Zoey 101, on Cartoon Network's Friday program, and leaking out of iPod minis, mall speakers, high school gyms and 100,000-seat stadiums. The Camp Rock series, entanglements with other famous teenagers, various concert films and their sitcom, Jonas, followed.

Nostalgia is an inescapable fog hanging around Nick, Joe and Kevin, as the world watches them tease each other on TV hosts' couches and jump around in matching suits again, for the first time in six years. It's not just about them. That bedazzled, low-rise moment is on everyone's minds. An avalanche of blog posts about their reunion begin with some iteration of the pseudo-incredulous question: "Avril Lavigne, JoJo and Ashley Tisdale are dropping albums, Amanda Bynes is back, Lindsay Lohan is making TV and The Jonas Brothers are getting back together. Is it 2019 or 2009?" PAPER recently debuted a column, called "This Week In 2009," to feed our appetite for photos of Rihanna with a momager haircut, andSpencer Pratt and Heidi Montag making out in surgical masks during the swine flu panic. The Jonas Brothers have already made it into several installments. The guys confirm they did not engineer their reunion to sync up with our cultural nostalgia cycle, but due to it, talking about the good old days will be an extra compulsory aspect of their press tour. At 26, 29 and 31, The Jonas Brothers aren't unwilling, but a bit ambivalent about rehashing their adolescence.

"We're not really defined by those years," Nick claims, when I ask the trio about how they look back on the fever pitch of the JoBro craze. But when I nudge, he admits the period was undeniably influential. "We had a lot of fun... you know, it was sort of a rocket ship to the moon during that time. When Disney played our video for 'Year 3000,' everything changed. It all started to happen when Disney got on board. Our years doing Camp Rock and TV shows were really formative."

It's not that The Jonas Brothers are at odds with their origin story. They'll soon release a glossy Amazon documentary reliving it, and this past weekend, gave a euphoric rendition of their 2008 hit "Burnin' Up" at their first SNL performance in a decade. But they've previously indicated otherwise. "I don't feel as frustrated now as I did then," Joe says of a candid as-told-to essay he gave New York Magazine in 2013, a few months after the band's break-up. He wrote then, "Being a part of the Disney thing for so long will make you not want to be this perfect little puppet forever." He detailed an authoritarian, image-obsessed company culture (recalling that High School Musical's Vanessa Hudgens was put on lockdown in the Disney offices after her nude photos were leaked), and how the band became stifled under Disney's tutelage, forced to maintain an increasingly awkward and false teen marketability as they grew eager to sing about more complex topics than crushes and homework. Joe and Kevin were required to shave every day, and allusions to anything sexier than a kiss or darker than a minor bummer were "sugar-coated." The essay is emotional, but not scornful, simply trying to make people understand the many factors that led up to 2013, when The Jonas Brothers cancelled their tour, scrapped their fifth album, and stopped being a band.

Joe doesn't walk back anything he wrote. But with the anxiety he faced back then as a newly unemployed solo act now largely evaporated, he speaks to the same topics with adult, big picture complexity. "We were having to censor ourselves, I think any artist could relate. That's not fun. We were at a standstill with our TV show and the movies. We were young adults, having to pretend like we're young teenagers," he reiterates, but explains that to be frustrated with the company was "such a weird mindset to get into, because we have Disney to thank for so much, they got us started in our career."

Nick bristles at the cartoonish idea that he and his brothers were victims of Big Bad Disney, or anything besides mutual investors in their image and success. "Before this becomes an indictment of Disney and Disney culture, I think it's important to say that, though we felt limited at times, bottom line, Disney was really good for us; really good training wheels for anybody that wants to become a musician or entertainer, as far as work ethic and all the rest. There was a balance to it all, and we could have had it a lot worse." They seem acutely aware there was no cost to their relationship with Disney more valuable than what they gained: "[Those years] are a major part of our story and a big way that our fans connect with us and continue to today." If it were the case that the world couldn't move on from their childhood, Nick says, "It might be tougher to accept... But we have to continue to make new statements and push ourselves to create who we are, every day."

"We were young adults, having to pretend like we're young teenagers." — Joe Jonas

Why would they be inclined to dwell on the past? Since their break-up — when Nick was 21, Joe was 24 and Kevin was 26 — each Jonas has transitioned into an entirely new life. Following his Married To Jonasreality TV show, Kevin retreated into his family and pursued real estate development, satisfied to spend his days as a non-famous. Joe and Nick each rebelled, a little. Joe, "the bad boy," experimented with the archetype he'd been cast in as a teen by dating famous models and growing a beard. Seeming to find the role ill-fitting, he then opted to become the frontman of fun dance-pop band DNCE, of "Cake By The Ocean" fame. Baby Nick tripled in girth, made a vulnerable, sexy R&B record, landed a few underwear billboards, and emerged as a Hollywood heartthrob following his effective performance in blockbuster Jumanji. As you might have heard, the latter two have also recently gotten married, attaching themselves to famous and successful women who, aside from appearing to make them genuinely very happy, also brought them back into the fold of A-list celebrity even before the reunion was announced.

Instead of reminiscing about the highs and lows of their days sketching Mickey Mouse's ears with a CGI wand or picking at scabbed-over angst at the behest of a pesky writer, The Jonas Brothers would rather talk about all the good things in their lives, now. For instance, how sublime it feels to be The Jonas Brothers, again.

"It's been incredible, being back together after the longest time apart and spending this amount of time together in the studio, not to mention actually announcing this stuff and the response to the music," gushes Kevin. "It's been so overwhelming and so exciting. It means so much to us to be able to do this again as brothers. It's just beyond..." The words "incredible," "exciting," "amazing," "overwhelming," as well as "crazy" and "surreal" are repeated over and over in our conversation, as they describe getting to know each other as brothers and musicians again. "It had been four or five years since we spent any time by ourselves, you know, just hanging out."

Today, The Jonas Brothers are poised to become a bigger force in music than they ever were in their Disney days. They've achieved this — despite re-entering a radically different pop landscape than the one they departed, now ruled by rappers making country, bearded scumbros making rap, and teen girls making ASMR — by doing exactly what first made them a sensation: clean, universal, good vibes pop songs.

"We take what we do seriously, but we don't take ourselves seriously." — Nick Jonas

Both of their new singles, "Cool" and "Sucker," radiate an unforced joy and playful confidence that seems to be the defining quality of The Jonas Brothers' second coming. "It's all about having fun," says Nick. "We take what we do seriously, but we don't take ourselves seriously."

The sound of The Jonas Brothers not taking themselves seriously is so pleasant that "Sucker" — a carbonated love song that sounds the way Pop Rocks fizzling on your tongue feel — has become their first ever No. 1 on the Billboard Hot 100. It doesn't sound like old Jonas Brothers, but it also doesn't sound like much else in pop right now. With the help of OneRepublic frontman, songwriter and producer Ryan Tedder (as well as popcraft overlords Max Martin, Greg Kurstin and Justin Tranter), The Jonas Brothers have shed their pop-punk-curious crunch and Disney sing-along sugar, while staying faithful to the drums-and-guitar roots and tactile storytelling that made a generation fall in love with them. The effect is a flavor of blissed out pure pop, that both sounds both refreshing next to today's deluge of morbid pop cyborgs and comfortingly familiar.

"We had a real sense that it was important for us to stay authentic to who we are," Nick explains when I ask how they resisted the urge to abandon their rockist roots for pop's current greener, genre-scrambled pastures. "When you go back and and listen to Jonas Brothers records, they're written and produced as rock and roll records." However, he says "that doesn't mean that we can't try out other sounds, or go on a journey to get there," and promises there's at least one trap beat and one yeehaw moment on Happiness Begins.

Despite the above, let's be honest: a No. 1 Jonas Brothers single in 2019 doesn't make complete sense (a glitch in the simulation, as they say). The Jonas Brothers belong in the past: in the childhoods of a generation now in their mid-twenties, and in a normcore, suburban fantasy that feels like it should have lost its appeal in our increasingly conscious times.

Plus, boy bands don't often get number ones. The last time one accomplished the feat was in 2003, when B2K's P. Diddy-assisted "Bump, Bump, Bump" hit number one (overtaking Christina Aguilera's "Beautiful" and Justin Timberlake's "Cry Me A River), according to Billboard. Even unfathomably famous ones: One Direction's highest entry on the Hot 100, 2013's "Best Song Ever," peaked at No. 2, lagging behind "Blurred Lines." Their own hits, 2008's "Burnin' Up," "Tonight" and "A Little Bit Longer," never made it past No. 5 during the reign of Katy Perry's "I Kissed A Girl" and Rihanna's "Disturbia." Their new trophy signals the JoBros have begun to transcend the silos of a traditional boy band audience, and thus, our general disdain for the culture young women tend to love.

So how did they do it?

There's a strong cinematic mythos to The Jonas Brothers' reunion story, which, indeed, will be soon available to stream. It went like this: Nick, the architect of the reunion, had started occasionally slipping JoBros songs into his solo sets and realized he was craving their brotherly magic. As they began spending time together on the set of their documentary, the seed in Nick's brain broke ground, and became an explicit conversation. Then, there was the spontaneous jam session of "Love Bug" in Cuba that reminded them of the magic of playing together. Then came the "intervention," when Kevin and Nick flew to Australia where Joe was hosting The Voice to address the baggage left over from their last run as a band, which they'd realized would be a prerequisite for a successful reunion. They did so with a series of conversations that Kevin describes as "the kind probably only brothers can have without wanting to throw a table at each other" ("they're in the doc, and they're heavy," he promises). During these talks, they decided that this time around, it would be all about having fun. Kevin adds: "The choice to do this wasn't out of need, it was more, 'This is something we really want to do together.'"

The Jonas Brothers' break-up went like this: the flame was Nick's solo ambitions. The gasoline was burn-out, the colliding egos of a band with two frontmen, diverging tastes (evident in the forked road of DNCE and Nick Jonas), and general paralysis. "We lost touch with what we wanted to say, because we were trying so hard to say something different from what we said in the past, musically and creatively," Nick explains. Plus, instead of becoming deluded by their preternatural fame, it had given them imposter syndrome and anxiety. "We understood that our level of success and fame had reached a point, where our musicianship and writing and performing abilities needed time to grow and catch up to it."

When I ask what kept them humble enough to realize this, Nick admits: "I think it was a combination of humility, and just being scared that it was all going to disappear." He references what he recalls as a Coldplay soundbite, that helped them through that choice: "I don't want to misquote, so you might want to fact check, but something about the fact that, they had become too big, you know, for their level of musicianship, so they worked harder than ever and went even deeper creatively. We really related to that." I'm unable to confirm the words belong to any member of Coldplay, but wherever The Jonas Brothers came across it, it must have been a comfort to know they were navigating charted rockstar waters.

Listening to the brothers reflect, it seems that the pyre underneath The Jonas Brothers' flame-out was simply the reality that Nick, Joe and Kevin are genuinely skilled, creative musicians, who were always going to clash with their cramped confines. Maybe the demises of commercial boy bands aren't a product of personal dysfunction at all, but rather, of their artistic health — evidence that they're composed of living, breathing human beings, rather than attractive androids positioned in the right spots on a music video set. If a group of kids in The Jonas Brothers' position forge ahead cheerfully into the complex chaos of their twenties without craving autonomy from each other or Disney's iron fist, someone should probably check under their curls for lobotomy scars.

"I think it was a combination of humility, and just being scared that it was all going to disappear." — Nick Jonas

"It really took the last six, seven years to figure out who we were as people and what kind of music we wanted to make." Nick says. He mentions tactfully that "a lot of young performers find this transition into adulthood really challenging," and implies pushing the bounds of their wholesome, juvenile aesthetic while still operating as The Jonas Brothers might not have been pretty: "If we had continued to try to push things forward the way we were operating, it might have been difficult. Perhaps we would have had to make bolder statements... shocked people into understanding who we are. I think the world is more accepting of us as adults than they would have been if we insisted, 'This is who we are now, accept us.'"

If they hadn't abandoned their spot at the top, and taken the time to grow up and chill out, avoiding many of the more excruciating personal and professional pitfalls of young pop stardom, The Jonas Brothers might have found themselves somewhat tragic figures in 2019, doomed to a career mired in nostalgia. Instead Nick, Kevin and Joe are having the time of their lives on their prodigal pop homecoming. I doubt they'd have this moment if they'd staged their return, however, by attempting to make the world see them as more than "just a boy band." With no ambitions beyond "trying to bottle happiness" and bringing "positive vibes to the world," as Nick explains of the album title inspiration, The Jonas Brothers, against the odds, have plucked themselves out of our "Week in 2009" column and earned a place in the living, breathing cultural fabric of 2019.

Maybe the key is simply prioritizing what's always been at the core of The Jonas Brothers: the fans — their palates and desires, giving them new lyrics to tattoo on their ankles, Easter eggs to mine for the details of their lives, and concerts to scream at with their friends.

"The reunion... felt like getting my best friend back after a long time," one fan, whose handle is @jonasbr0, says on Twitter. Another, whose display handle reads "Kat LOVES the Jonas Brothers," claims "I'm the most excited that anyone has ever been about anything," revealing "When I graduated high school I decorated my cap to say "I'd rather be at a Jonas Brothers concert." "Their music has brought some of my best friends into my life. We've all grown up together with the boys" says @taylaxo, whose pinned Tweet is a photo of herself in a sweatshirt printed with a Tweet from Joe announcing the reunion.

Nick muses, "The best part of this go around, is the fact that those fans have lived with our records for so many years that they're part of their lives, and they're really meaningful to them. We can feel that energy. All those years of fearing it was going to disappear are now kind of..." he trails off.

Source: PAPER Magazine

#jonas brothers #joe jonas #nick jonas #kevin jonas #paper magazine #text #article #interview #2019

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hillnerd · 6 years

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THE LEAD UP TO HARRY/GINNY

So, I see a lot of people saying Harry Potter/Ginny Weasley was ‘forced’ felt ‘rushed’ etc.

Hinny was lead up to for 5 books, son! :) In no way is that rushed.

Harry and Gin’s love story is basically one of bad timing, where themes, foreshadowing, language and characterization have been used to slowly establish Ginny as special in Harry’s life, and forge the foundation on which their relationship is built in book 6.

I have receipts. :D

LONG ‘ESSAY’ ABOUT H/G BUILDUP IN BOOKS 1-5:

Book 1 - first girl he meets

she’s the first weasley kid/first nice kid he even hears speak actually

And there’s this brief description of him watching her I find very poetic:

The train began to move. Harry saw the boys’ mother waving and their sister, half laughing, half crying, running to keep up with the train until it gathered too much speed; then she fell back and waved. Harry watched the girl and her mother disappear as the train rounded the corner.

Book 2- giant book of foreshadowing

So, this book ties Ginny and Harry thematically, establishes certain patterns with them, ties Gin to the main themes of the books very inextricably, ties her to Harry in a way no other character is tied, and also establishes her as a future love interest for Harry.

In NO way am I saying Harry had romantic notions about her at this point in the series (heck no! He’s just 12!)- but rather from a writing perspective, things were put in place to establish future H/G goodness.

From the get go, she is described, again, in somewhat cute/‘poetic’ language

At that moment there was a diversion in the form of a small, red-headed figure in a long nightdress, who appeared in the kitchen, gave a small squeal, and ran out again.

Harry just caught sight of a pair of bright brown eyes staring at him before it closed with a snap.

Ginny seemed very prone to knocking things over whenever Harry entered a room. She dived under the table to retrieve the bowl and emerged with her face glowing like the setting sun.

“Oh, are you starting at Hogwarts this year?” Harry asked Ginny. She nodded, blushing to the roots of her flaming hair, and put her elbow in the butter dish. Fortunately no one saw this except Harry’

So she’s this adorable little winsome gal who Harry (established as pretty effing rude about most girls/women he describe), is giving language I’d love to have written about me even now, as a full-grown married woman.

So, of course we start off book 2 with Ginny being a shy little sister, who has a crush on her brother best friend/is enamored with the boy hero. Even though she could have been written as burdensome or annoying to Harry- he never once feels that way about her (even when tackled by that cupid dwarf with her singing valentine.)

To the contrary, he’s always quite sweet with her, giving her his books, notices when she’s out of sorts, pulls out his wand to expelliarmus Draco when he’s taunting Ginny by holding her diary (which mirrors Ron’s going after Draco when Draco was calling Hermione mudblood), and then he freaking saves her.

Also, let’s point out a silly things: Draco calls Gin Harry’s girlfriend in book 2. ;) How’s THAT for romantic foreshadowing? :)

“Leave him alone, he didn’t want all that!” said Ginny. It was the first time she had spoken in front of Harry. She was glaring at Malfoy.“Potter, you’ve got yourself a girlfriend!” drawled Malfoy.

The language when he saves her, again, has emotional resonance than he had for almost anyone else in the series for the first few books- THIS IS NOT ROMANTIC- just establishes a theme of how Harry considers her and has a soft spot for her (seriously, read this, then go back and read his underwhelming reaction to Ron possibly being severely injured in PS/SS with the chess match… like… for reals):

He couldn’t not go, not now they had found the entrance to the Chamber, not if there was even the faintest, slimmest, wildest chance that Ginny might be alive.

And between the feet [of the statue’s robes], facedown, lay a small, black-robed figure with flaming-red hair.

“Ginny!” Harry muttered, sprinting to her and dropping to his knees. “Ginny — don’t be dead — please don’t be dead —” He flung his wand aside, grabbed Ginny’s shoulders, and turned her over. Her face was white as marble, and as cold, yet her eyes were closed, so she wasn’t Petrified. But then she must be —

“Ginny, please wake up,” Harry muttered desperately, shaking her. Ginny’s head lolled hopelessly from side to side.’

Also, in this book, though it’s quick little bits here and there, they establish also how Harry and Gin instinctively ‘get’ one another, despite their lack of interaction- like when she defends Harry to Draco with ‘he didn’t want all that’- or when he keep Ron from prying after he saves Gin

“I’ll explain when we get out of here,” said Harry with a sideways glance at Ginny, who was crying harder than ever.

“But —”

“Later,” Harry said shortly. He didn’t think it was a good idea to tell Ron yet who’d been opening the Chamber, not in front of Ginny,

This is how their dynamic works later in the series- they just get each other’s motivations/needs. Even this early on, hints of their dynamic is established - as hey, some people just get one another- even when they are platonic childhood friends.

So on top of all the above, she’s connected to him in that she knows horcruxes and Tom Riddle basically better than anyone, really. (I was sort of bummed they didn’t use this more later, though DAMN is she doesn’t sass Harry out of yelling in book 5 over it :D). She introduces one of the most important things in the series- needing to know Voldemort, Voldemort’s soul imprints, and how to defeat horcuxes.

Only four characters have ever had the mental influence of a horcrux, that we know of- Harry, Ginny, Ron and Hermione. Of them all, only Harry and Ginny ever really got perspective on Riddle/Voldemort- vs Ron and Herm were influenced, not sharing back and forth. This makes Ginny stand out thematically from any other character in the series- that she shares this connection with Harry.

Harry saves her in probably the most traditionally romantic/fantasy driven/fairy tale way- literally the hero saves a damsel in distress from a giant reptile with a sword- but Rowling subverts this by having them literally have no romance build from there for another 4 books- because they are kids.

So yeah- she’s established early on, writing-wise, as a future flame for him, and tied them very closely.

Book 3 - briefest of shared moments

Ginny is barely present in this book, but despite her crush making her rather mute in front of him- they have a share moment of humor (which seems to be a big connection for the two of them- the two always catching each other’s eye and smirking at eachother later in the series.)

“Ah, there’s Penelope!” said Percy, smoothing his hair and going pink again. Ginny caught Harry’s eye, and they both turned away to hide their laughter as Percy strode over to a girl with long, curly hair, walking with his chest thrown out so that she couldn’t miss his shiny badge.

Both are deeply affected by dementors (along with Nev, though his is just mentioned as being pale along with Gin) on the train.

Ginny, who was huddled in her corner looking nearly as bad as Harry felt, gave a small sob; Hermione went over and put a comforting arm around her. “But didn’t any of you — fall off your seats?” said Harry awkwardly. “No,” said Ron, looking anxiously at Harry again. “Ginny was shaking like mad, though…”

And she gives him another card when he’s in the hospital (which he keeps, even though he hard to literally keep it under a fruit bowl so it won’t sing anymore- he’s dispassionately thrown out Hagrid’s rock cakes and Ron and Hermione’s gifts he actually enjoyed before- so here he is, still having a tender (but platonic) spot for Ginny.)

Book 4- character establishment and missed opportunities

So, again, Ginny isn’t around much in this book. She still blushes around him a little, but is able to smile and talk with him much more easily, especially about the twins’ joke shop endeavors, and definitely has a lot more of her sass come out (fleetingly saw a couple of times of it in book 3).

She’s still not included in any of the trio’s antics (not even being told about Sirius’s innocence)- and they mainly establish that she has a great sense of humor like her brothers, laughing a lot at things Harry and Ron do (while Hermione can’t bring herself to laugh, b/c it’s hermione), and being compassionate as per usual to people and animals alike (as in book 3).

Anyways, the main thing that stands out in this book- is the missed opportunity for all the main characters to go out with their future romantic partner/s.

Ron and Hermione don’t go to the ball.

Harry and Ginny don’t go to the ball.

Harry and Cho don’t go to the ball.

It’s a big missed moment for them all, really. :P

So yeah- we all are very aware of all that yule ball, who is going out with who drama-

Anyways, another moment I like is Weasleys are always his escape - and she’s a part of that. :

Fred, George, and Ginny came to sit next to [Ron and Harry] too, and Harry was having such a good time he felt almost as though he were back at the Burrow; he had forgotten to worry about that evening’s task, and not until Hermione turned up, halfway through lunch, did he remember that she had had a brainwave about Rita Skeeter.

Book 5 - Establishing the foundation through interactions, themes and language.

So, this is where we get to see full-out Ginny. No longer is it just hints at her sass, pieces of her compassion, tiny shared moments between her and Harry- oooh no. This book is where we finally have Ginny’s full glory out and about, and it’s awesome. She is ballsy, she is cool, and lord help me, I love her so much. JKR establishes a very very firm foundation for a romantic relationship between them to blossom in this book.

From the get go, Ginny is on point.

So a quick exploration of how awesome Ginny is:

The door opened and a long mane of red hair appeared. “Oh hello, Harry!” said Ron’s younger sister, Ginny, brightly. “I thought I heard your voice.”

This is after he was screaming, and had just been teased by the twins for it. Again that poetic language is used for her, and she’s now part of his gang- and intimate along with Ron and Hermione (or as close as anyone can get) with his plans and life.

Like, I could go on forever about how cool Gin in this book, but I’ve literally written pages at this point. Suffice it to say- she kicks arse - like, she’s hangin with the twin and being cool in Grimmauld place, she’s kicking butt at quidditch, she’s flying into Smith when he’s an arse, she’s known for her bat bogey hex.

“Yeah, size is no guarantee of power,” said George. “Look at Ginny.” “What d’you mean?” said Harry. “You’ve never been on the receiving end of one of her Bat-Bogey Hexes, have you?”

And she’s compassionate too, as she’s kind to Luna and Neville a whole bunch in this book

“I’m nobody,” said Neville hurriedly. “No you’re not,” said Ginny sharply. “Neville Longbottom — Luna Lovegood.”

She and Harry share grins and laughs throughout the book

Well, hello there!” [Lockhart] said. “I expect you’d like my autograph, would you?” “Hasn’t changed much, has he?” Harry muttered to Ginny, who grinned.

So yeah, Ginny is amazing, so it’s not really a surprise that the next book, when Harry is no longer crushing on Cho, he takes notice.

The main points of connection between Harry and Gin are that: a few times in this book he relies on her to help him emotionally, or she just steps up to do it- at times she does it better than any other pier of his, including Ron and Hermione.

The first moment where she really helps Harry out is on the Hogwarts Express:

The train was gathering still more speed, so that the houses outside the window flashed past and they swayed where they stood. “Shall we go and find a compartment, then?” Harry asked Ron and Hermione. Ron and Hermione exchanged looks.

“Er,” said Ron.

“We’re — well — Ron and I are supposed to go into the prefect carriage,” Hermione said awkwardly. Ron wasn’t looking at Harry; he seemed to have become intensely interested in the fingernails on his left hand.

“Oh,” said Harry. “Right. Fine.”

“I don’t think we’ll have to stay there all journey,” said Hermione quickly. “Our letters said we just get instructions from the Head Boy and Girl and then patrol the corridors from time to time.”

“Fine,” said Harry again. “Well, I-I might see you later, then.”

“Yeah, definitely,” said Ron, casting a shifty, anxious look at Harry. “It’s a pain having to go down there, I’d rather — but we have to — I mean, I’m not enjoying it, I’m not Percy,” he finished defiantly.

“I know you’re not,” said Harry and he grinned. But as Hermione and Ron dragged their trunks, Crookshanks, and a caged Pigwidgeon off toward the engine end of the train, Harry felt an odd sense of loss. He had never traveled on the Hogwarts Express without Ron.

“Come on,” Ginny told him, “if we get a move on we’ll be able to save them places.”

So back to school they go, and poor Harry is all alone and a bit lost as to what to do with himself when Ron and Hermione leave him for prefect stuff. Ginny immediately takes charge and is super sweet, finding him a compartment, hanging with him and Neville and Luna. I’d like to point out, she didn’t HAVE to help him out at all. She has her own friends in her year (who hail her over the second they’re in the great hall) and a boyfriend- she’s just being awesome.

She then comforts him about Cho for a sec (as she gets the whole trying to look cool

Harry slumped back in his seat and groaned. He would have liked Cho to discover him sitting with a group of very cool people laughing their heads off at a joke he had just told; he would not have chosen to be sitting with Neville and Loony Lovegood, clutching a toad and dripping in Stinksap.

“Never mind,” said Ginny bracingly. “Look, we can get rid of all this easily.” She pulled out her wand. “Scourgify!” The Stinksap vanished.

Ginny, unlike the other young ladies in Harry’s life, has the ability to bring calm to the storm at times with pointed humor. Like the first DA meeting, when Luna and Hermione break into a fight that derails the whole thing:

“Yes, he’s got an army of heliopaths,” said Luna solemnly.

“No, he hasn’t,” snapped Hermione.

“Yes, he has,” said Luna.

“What are heliopaths?” asked Neville, looking blank.

“They’re spirits of fire,” said Luna, her protuberant eyes widening so that she looked madder than ever. “Great tall flaming creatures that gallop across the ground burning everything in front of —”

“They don’t exist, Neville,” said Hermione tartly. “Oh yes they do!” said Luna angrily.

“I’m sorry, but where’s the proof of that?” snapped Hermione.

“There are plenty of eyewitness accounts, just because you’re so narrow-minded you need to have everything shoved under your nose before you —”

“Hem, hem,” said Ginny in such a good imitation of Professor Umbridge that several people looked around in alarm and then laughed. “Weren’t we trying to decide how often we’re going to meet and get Defense lessons?”

Ginny is able to calm him where no one else can when he’s afraid after he’s had the dream with Mr Weasley- not only de-escalating him, but also cheering him up, while standing up to him full on and able to snap him out of it and make him listen:

[Hermione] sat down next to Ginny, and the two girls and Ron looked up at Harry. “How’re you feeling?” asked Hermione.

“Fine,” said Harry stiffly. “Oh, don’t lie, Harry,” she said impatiently.

“Ron and Ginny say you’ve been hiding from everyone since you got back from St. Mungo’s.”

“They do, do they?” said Harry, glaring at Ron and Ginny. Ron looked down at his feet but Ginny seemed quite unabashed. “Well, you have!” she said. “And you won’t look at any of us!”

“It’s you lot who won’t look at me!” said Harry angrily.

“Maybe you’re taking it in turns to look and keep missing each other,” suggested Hermione, the corners of her mouth twitching. “Very funny,” snapped Harry, turning away.

“Oh, stop feeling all misunderstood,” said Hermione sharply. “Look, the others have told me what you overheard last night on the Extendable Ears —”

“Yeah?” growled Harry, his hands deep in his pockets as he watched the snow now falling thickly outside. “All been talking about me, have you? Well, I’m getting used to it… .”

“We wanted to talk to you, Harry,” said Ginny, “but as you’ve been hiding ever since we got back —”

“I didn’t want anyone to talk to me,” said Harry, who was feeling more and more nettled.

“Well, that was a bit stupid of you,” said Ginny angrily, “seeing as you don’t know anyone but me who’s been possessed by You-KnowWho, and I can tell you how it feels.” Harry remained quite still as the impact of these words hit him. Then he turned on the spot to face her.

“I forgot,” he said.

“Lucky you,” said Ginny coolly.

“I’m sorry,” Harry said, and he meant it.

“So … so do you think I’m being possessed, then?”

“Well, can you remember everything you’ve been doing?” Ginny asked. “Are there big blank periods where you don’t know what you’ve been up to?” Harry racked his brains. “No,” he said.

“Then You-Know-Who hasn’t ever possessed you,” said Ginny simply. “When he did it to me, I couldn’t remember what I’d been doing for hours at a time. I’d find myself somewhere and not know how I got there.”

Harry hardly dared believe her, yet his heart was lightening almost in spite of himself.

[Herm and Harry give input on how he was in bed the whole time and no one apparated into hogwarts]. I’m not the weapon after all, thought Harry. His heart swelled with happiness and relief, and he felt like joining in as they heard Sirius tramping past their door toward Buckbeak’s room, singing “God Rest Ye Merry, Hippogriffs” at the top of his voice.

So yeah- Ginny was able to bring him peace of mind in a way LITERALLY NO ONE ELSE COULD.

She goes on to bolster him about his quidditch ban (and is the only person to really do so, it seems) and then again shows her ability to ‘get’ him:

“Good catch,” Harry told Ginny back in the common room, where the atmosphere closely resembled that of a particularly dismal funeral.

“I was lucky,” she shrugged. “It wasn’t a very fast Snitch and Summerby’s got a cold, he sneezed and closed his eyes at exactly the wrong moment. Anyway, once you’re back on the team —”

“Ginny, I’ve got a lifelong ban.”

“You’re banned as long as Umbridge is in the school,” Ginny corrected him. “There’s a difference. Anyway, once you’re back, I think I’ll try out for Chaser. Angelina and Alicia are both leaving next year and I prefer goal-scoring to Seeking anyway.”

Harry looked over at Ron, who was hunched in a corner, staring at his knees, a bottle of butterbeer clutched in his hand. “Angelina still won’t let him resign,” Ginny said, as though reading Harry’s mind.

Then she inspires hope in him, yet again:

“It’s Easter eggs from Mum,” said Ginny. “There’s one for you… . There you go… .” She handed him a handsome chocolate egg decorated with small, iced Snitches and, according to the packaging, containing a bag of Fizzing Whizbees. Harry looked at it for a moment, then, to his horror, felt a hard lump rise in his throat.

“Are you okay, Harry?” asked Ginny quietly.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” said Harry gruffly. The lump in his throat was painful. He did not understand why an Easter egg should have made him feel like this.

“You seem really down lately,” Ginny persisted. “You know, I’m sure if you just talked to Cho …”

“It’s not Cho I want to talk to,” said Harry brusquely.

“Who is it, then?” asked Ginny.

“I …” He glanced around to make quite sure that nobody was listening; Madam Pince was several shelves away, stamping out a pile of books for a frantic-looking Hannah Abbott. “I wish I could talk to Sirius,” he muttered. “But I know I can’t.” More to give himself something to do than because he really wanted any, Harry unwrapped his Easter egg, broke off a large bit, and put it into his mouth.

“Well,” said Ginny slowly, helping herself to a bit of egg too, “if you really want to talk to Sirius, I expect we could think of a way to do it… .”

“Come on,” said Harry hopelessly. “With Umbridge policing the fires and reading all our mail?”

“The thing about growing up with Fred and George,” said Ginny thoughtfully, “is that you sort of start thinking anything’s possible if you’ve got enough nerve.” Harry looked at her.

Perhaps it was the effect of the chocolate — Lupin had always advised eating some after encounters with dementors — or simply because he had finally spoken aloud the wish that had been burning inside him for a week, but he felt a bit more hopeful… .

So on top of ALL THAT- there are literary themes tying Ginny and Cho together. His current flame is somehow always getting cocurrently talked about or written about with Ginny flitting around in there. Ginny and Cho’s lives mirror each other, or they are inexplicably linked in scenes. We see scenes where they intersect, Ginny and Cho are in competetition (note, Ginny always wins), and their love lives seem to twist into one another’s. Coincidence?! I think not! :D

“Ginny used to fancy Harry, but she gave up on him months ago. Not that she doesn’t like you, of course,” she added kindly to Harry while she examined a long black-and-gold quill. Harry, whose head was still full of Cho’s parting wave, did not find this subject quite as interesting as Ron, who was positively quivering with indignation, but it did bring something home to him that until now he had not really registered.

“So that’s why she talks now?” he asked Hermione. “She never used to talk in front of me.”

“Exactly,” said Hermione. [hermione shops]

Ron still breathing down her neck. “Ron,” she said severely as she turned and trod on his feet, “this is exactly why Ginny hasn’t told you she’s seeing Michael, she knew you’d take it badly. So don’t harp on about it, for heaven’s sake.”

“What d’you mean, who’s taking anything badly? I’m not going to harp on about anything …”

Ron continued to chunter under his breath all the way down the street. Hermione rolled her eyes at Harry and then said in an undertone, while Ron was muttering imprecations about Michael Corner, “And talking about Michael and Ginny … what about Cho and you?”

Somewhat to Harry’s disappointment, it was Ginny who managed to find Cho Chang and her friend first

“The Defense Association?” said Cho. “The D.A. for short, so nobody knows what we’re talking about?”

“Yeah, the D.A.’s good,” said Ginny. “Only let’s make it stand for Dumbledore’s Army because that’s the Ministry’s worst fear, isn’t it?” There was a good deal of appreciative murmuring and laughter at this.

“All in favor of the D.A.?” said Hermione bossily, kneeling up on her cushion to count. “That’s a majority — motion passed!”

Harry glimpsed Ron and Ginny skimming over the stands and felt a horrible pang that he was not up there with them… . “You really miss it, don’t you?” said Cho.

“Yeah,” said Ron slowly, savoring the words, “we won. Did you see the look on Chang’s face when Ginny got the Snitch right out from under her nose?”

“I suppose she cried, did she?” said Harry bitterly.

“Well, yeah — more out of temper than anything, though …”

Harry looked around. Cho was passing, accompanied by Marietta Edgecombe, who was wearing a balaclava. His and Cho’s eyes met for a moment. Cho blushed and kept walking. Harry looked back down at the chessboard just in time to see one of his pawns chased off its square by Ron’s knight.

“What’s — er — going on with you and her anyway?” Ron asked quietly.

“Nothing,” said Harry truthfully.

“I — er — heard she’s going out with someone else now,” said Hermione tentatively. Harry was surprised to find that this information did not hurt at all. Wanting to impress Cho seemed to belong to a past that was no longer quite connected with him. [paragraph about Sirius’s death]

“You’re well out of it, mate,” said Ron forcefully. “I mean, she’s quite good-looking and all that, but you want someone a bit more cheerful.”

“She’s probably cheerful enough with someone else,” said Harry, shrugging.

“Who’s she with now anyway?” Ron asked Hermione, but it was Ginny who answered.

“Michael Corner,” she said. “Michael — but —” said Ron, craning around in his seat to stare at her. “But you were going out with him!”

“Not anymore,” said Ginny resolutely. “He didn’t like Gryffindor beating Ravenclaw at Quidditch and got really sulky, so I ditched him and he ran off to comfort Cho instead.” […]

“Well, I always thought he was a bit of an idiot,” [Ron] said, prodding his queen forward toward Harry’s quivering castle. “Good for you. Just choose someone — better — next time.” He cast Harry an oddly furtive look as he said it.

“Well, I’ve chosen Dean Thomas, would you say he’s better?” asked Ginny vaguely. “WHAT?” shouted Ron,

SO THERE YA GO- ALL THAT BUILD UP- :) was it fast and out of nowhere? no way! Reread and see it right there in the books, mates!

Like, you can not like their ship- but there is no denying the buildup.

#hinny #harry/ginny #essay #shipping #REPOSTED from a reply

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