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noirlevity · 1 year

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Scent chapter 25

Pairing: TadaAi Fandom: Sk8 the Infinity Synopsis: Ainosuke once loved Tadashi, but ever since he broke his heart, he decided to never have anything to do with him. But what happens if he meets him again after so many years and finds out a secret that will change both of their lives forever?

Chapter summary: They meet Tadashi's doctor. Still loveydovey.

Tags: Omegaverse, forced bonding, sorta angst, slow burn, sorta reversible but I am for top!Tadashi so maybe no explicit smut with bottom Tada in the future

They meet Tadashi's doctor. Still loveydovey.

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Ainosuke and Tadashi spent the entire trip talking and getting to know each other, just like they how they came. It’s a weird feeling for both. Tadashi didn't mind not knowing. His utmost concern was to make new memories that could rewrite the pain that he caused.

However, it was different for Ainosuke. Ainosuke wanted to know more about Tadashi's life. It felt like they picked up where they left off a decade ago. Now, he could do more than he's allowed to. Ainosuke was no longer the expectant teenager who was always waiting for Tadashi to come to the mansion. He was no longer the heartbroken child who cried himself to sleep remembering the hurtful words Tadashi had said to him. He was no longer a person who questioned his place in his beloved's life. Now they are happy and together. That was enough. He won't deny that this happiness also gives him anxiety, however, it goes without saying that he won’t allow this worry that is bubbling underneath his happiness to take over what they both have right now. He doesn’t know what Tadashi feels about this. Maybe he is worried as well. However, that is a topic for another time.

Tadashi talks in a voice that is gentle and soft. It is pleasing to the ears, even if it competes with the chatter inside the bus. Ainosuke gazes at Tadashi dreamily as he listens to him talk about his club activities in high school. Tadashi tells him about the astronomy club and about the constant stargazing events they had. He told Ainosuke he joined the club because it was chill and he liked learning about the stars and constellations. Apart from that, he liked how no matter where you are they are always there silently watching you. Since they are constants, looking at them hanging in the sky makes Tadashi feel closer to Ainosuke.

"We live under the same sky," Tadashi says. "That thought comforted me. It turned out that Japan and the US have different timezones so it was a bit pointless."

"It was not pointless," Ainosuke says. "Because I always wake up early just to gaze at the sky and wonder about how the night sky would look over here. So it’s not pointless." The smile that Ainosuke flashed at Tadashi made the older man blush.

"And you know, I did a lot of embarrassing things trying to forget you. Even if you didn’t cope with joining the astronomy club, I bet with the amount of time I spent thinking about you, you won’t be needing something to get me off your mind.

"All the people I dated wonder why I know a lot about roses. It was a shock to them because I don’t even have a garden where I live." Ainosuke pauses and leans towards Tadashi. "How can I not know? When you always talk about roses and how to take care of them every time there is an opportunity for it. If you’ve talked about horticulture in general, I would have been called a plant enthusiast but people think it’s a bit weird I only know about roses." Ainosuke chuckled.

"Some women think that I can’t get over an ex or something like that and confront me about it, and when I deny it, they always get angry. It’s true though. You are not an ex. I was just hopelessly in love and can’t move on." Ainosuke turns red and looks away.

"Running my mouth like this is unlike me." He lifts his eyes to hold Tadashi’s gaze. "But I know you won’t know how deeply I feel for you if I don’t say it."

After their conversations, it was clear that Tadashi tended to downplay his attractiveness. People had always told him he was gloomy and dull. With his disposition, he says it had been hard for him to have friends at school. That’s why Ainosuke thinks that Tadashi should have more confidence in himself. Even though it was obvious he didn’t care about what others thought, as his boyfriend, Ainosuke wants Tadashi to feel good about himself.

Ainosuke’s straightforwardness makes Tadashi smile. Ainosuke thinks if Tadashi could only smile like this, people wouldn’t think he’s dull. He is attractive. Tadashi’s charming, droopy green eyes are eye-catching when hit by light. It turns a deep emerald shade when it does. He has a small, oval-shaped face and a straight nose. If it weren't for how stressed and exhausted he appears when he puts his hair up, he could be mistaken for having a talent for j**ny's ent.Tadashi is slender too and hasn’t aged since he was 19.

His face is not the only attractive thing about him. Tadashi has many skills. He finished top of his class and was a student council president. Tadashi didn’t say this himself, but Ainosuke knew. He read his file fully after all. Quite literally, Tadashi can do anything. He can pilot a helicopter, do coding, and even garden!

The drone of Tadashi’s voice was soothing. This is probably the longest time Ainosuke has heard him speak.

"What about you, Ainosuke-sama?" Tadashi asks. Ainosuke had been asking him a lot of questions, so he’s been speaking all this time.

"There wasn’t much in America." Ainosuke began telling Tadashi about the parties he would go to, the scenery there, the food, and about his friend named Nico. When he told Tadashi that Nico knew about him, Tadashi couldn’t help but widen his eyes and flush slightly. Ainosuke confessed to the reason why he knew. That was because Nico says he has a type and it was having similar features to Tadashi. Every November he was always in a bad mood so his friend wondered why it was so.

Hearing all of this, Tadashi couldn’t help but clench his jaw. He felt a bit shy learning all of this.

"You’re not creeped out, are you?" Ainosuke asks. He wondered if this information made him look like an obsessed creep.

"No, but Yamamoto-san and I don’t look alike. He is a stunning beauty. Being compared to the likes of him… we are nothing alike." Tadashi looked a bit ashen when he finished speaking. He really couldn’t believe Ainosuke found similarities between the two of them.

"Nico said that too; that you and him look nothing alike. To me though he looks like you when in side view.

"Every time I see his side profile when we’re together, it feels like it’s you that I’m with." Ainosuke presses his lips together and whispers. "I’ve recently realized this. Don’t get me wrong though. I didn’t go out with him just because he looks a bit like you. I truly cared for him."

Tadashi giggles and rubs Ainosuke’s hand affectionately. He asks Ainosuke to tell him more about his experiences in the US. Ainosuke obliges and they end up talking about the places Ainosuke wants to take Tadashi to.

With how well they were getting along, Ainosuke thinks that love truly is sweeter the second time around.

Their conversation got interrupted when Tadashi remembered about his appointment with his doctor. Tadashi explained that he had contacted his doctor and informed him that he was going with Ainosuke. He informed Ainosuke that the doctor was looking forward to the visit and that he was glad that Tadashi finally told Ainosuke about their bond. Their conversation sizzled when Ainosuke fell asleep. Tadashi held his hand gently. Now alone with his thoughts, his mind wandered.

—-

"Kikuchi-san..." The doctor said with worry heavy in his tone.

"I know, doctor. You don't need to say anything."

"You shouldn't push yourself. Why don't you just tell him the truth?"

"It was just an accident," Tadashi says matter of factly.

"But, if this continues…"

Leaning back on his chair, the doctor sighed. "It would have been more convenient and practical if you had mated with Sato-kun instead. Talk about bad luck!"

"Look at that wound! It’s just a bit more acceptable than the wounds you usually come here for. Honestly, is this how pure-blooded alphas mark their partners? The last time…"

"It wasn’t painful." Tadashi interrupts.

"Unlike with…" Tadashi swallowed and took a deep breath. "I didn’t feel any pain when he bit me."

"Of course, it doesn’t. He is your fated pair after all!" The doctor said exasperated.

"To have endured this long. I can’t believe it. Do you not remember anything?"

"I don’t. The first time I confirmed he was my mate, I was surprised too."

The doctor gave him a side-eye.

"The number of medicine you’ve been taking is worrying.

"Sato-kun is worried. Your mom and dad do not know this thing you’re enduring. You’re lucky the medicine doesn't result in an addiction, but if this continues, you may have other medical complications." The doctor sighs again.

"You’re so stubborn, Kikuchi-san. I’m the one who wants to cry here.

"I won’t prescribe you suppressants for a while. I advise you to take a health break for at least a month."

"Yes,"

"I’m planning to quit. But not now."

The doctor sighs again.

"What will you do if he attacks you again?"

"He won’t. He would never. It was just that this time…"

"Kikuchi-san, don’t give yourself reasons to condone his behavior."

Tadashi freezes. He felt a bit insulted. He knows that the doctor is strict towards this kind of talk coming from him considering his history, but Ainosuke was not like Aichirou. He only bit him like that because someone drugged him and made him violent. Tadashi could only swallow the bubbling anger in his chest and listen.

"I’m planning to break our bond no matter what."

"But first," Tadashi says, lifting his gaze. "I want to make sure he’s happy."

A clutter. The doctor takes off his glasses and wipes them.

"You don’t need to. You don’t need to make amends. Nothing is your fault. Circumstances can just be cruel. It is he and his family that owe you."

The doctor knits his brows and continues, "He forced a bond on you. But if he wasn’t the one to do it, then you would have come here with his bite mark instead. You really can’t win.

"Kikuchi-san, you have to take better care of yourself. That is why you should not rush and should carefully consider your options. Rest for a while, you need it."

"Yes, doctor."

—-

The hand he was holding felt like an assurance. Tadashi leans his head against Ainosuke’s and closed his eyes.

When Tadashi and Ainosuke finally arrived at the terminal, it was nighttime. They were tired, but they still had to meet with Tadashi’s doctor. Earlier, Natsuno called Ainosuke. He said that his Aunts were wondering where he was and that they were scary so he should go home as soon as possible. Ainosuke replied that he was staying another night at Tadashi’s place.

They took a taxi to the doctor. After waiting for a few minutes, it was finally their turn to meet the doctor. Tadashi’s doctor was a small man of 45 with a stern disposition. When Ainosuke met him, the older man studied him cautiously. That look made clear to Ainosuke how much he knew about his and Tadashi’s situation. He didn’t mind it though. For him it was good, at least Tadashi had someone to lean on during the rough times he had endured until now.

They entered the office and sat across from each other. An assistant delivered Tadashi’s records. The doctor adjusts his glasses on the bridge of his nose and flips through it. After a while, he cleared his throat and began explaining about Tadashi’s heat cycle. Ainosuke was surprised when he knew that Tadashi’s heat came before his examination. It was not immediately identified as his heat because he only exhibited fever-like symptoms. When he was examined and identified as an omega all the pieces seemed to fit. One thing that was odd though was none of his alpha classmates had noticed that he was in heat. His heat cycle was studied thoroughly since he was a teenager and has been concluded to be mild. There were no problems. His heats were regular and consistent. Unlike other omegas, because it is mild, he can perform even when he is in heat, that’s why Tadashi has been living as if he was a beta. Only a few people know he was an omega.

This all changed after Ainosuke came home from the states. Tadashi’s heat started becoming irregular. That was also the reason why he started drinking a higher dosage of his medicines. The doctor explains that this reaction is normal, the two of them are fated pairs after all. He also explained that Tadashi has to stop drinking suppressants for now because if he doesn’t it would be detrimental to his health. The most common side effect was sterility, however, according to recent research findings, it may cause early onset dementia." Furthermore, the doctor said it can cause Tadashi to relapse.

"Relapse?" Ainosuke asked. The Doctor glanced at Tadashi to ask for permission.

"He was on pain medication before."

Ainosuke remembered that Tadashi had been enduring a lot of pain when Aichirou was still alive so he understood and just nodded.

"I suggest that the suppressant be done away with. You already know about his condition, Shindo-san. It’s your responsibility as his alpha to help his heats."

"There is no problem. I am prepared for it." Ainosuke pauses and adds, "Doctor, can we do anything to at least tone down Tadashi’s insomnia?"

"I’ve given him sleeping pills. We tried a higher dosage didn’t we, Kikuchi-san? But he says the scent Sato-san gifted him helped me more than those pills." The doctor sighs. His face lit up when he remembered something.

"Maybe it would be better to see a therapist too. I am no expert in that department."

The doctor wrote something on his prescription note and gave it to Tadashi.

"Here, I prescribed your vitamins. I’m glad you looked well now." Looking at Ainosuke he added, "Sorry I misjudged you Shindo-san. You turned out different from what I expected. I can see that you truly care for Kikuchi-san. He’s a stubborn one, so I hope you can guide him through the right path." The doctor giggles. It makes Tadashi blush. Ainosuke glanced at his boyfriend with a confused look on his face.

They waited for a taxi to get home, but Tadashi was a bit jittery. He grabs the hem of Ainosuke’s shirt.

"Why don’t we stay the night at a hotel?" Tadashi says, a bit shy.

Ainosuke widened his eyes. It seems like his boyfriend was the eager type. He felt a bit shy too at the realization that Tadashi wanted to do that.

When they arrived at the hotel room, Ainosuke and Tadashi found themselves sitting on the bed awkwardly not facing each other. It was their first time having sex at a hotel. Ainosuke had sex plenty of times in this kind of place but for him, it was still nerve-wracking. Tadashi whose back was to him was quiet. After a few seconds, Tadashi said that he will take a shower first. Ainosuke moves closer to stop him from leaving. He pulled Tadashi and wrapped his arms around his boyfriend.

"Let’s shower together?" Ainosuke pouts, his chin resting on Tadashi’s shoulder.

A sweet smell wafted in the air. Ainosuke could sense Tadashi’s lust as he stares at him.

"Ainosuke-sama…" Tadashi leans in and kisses Ainosuke’s ears.

"Hmm~" Ainosuke hums.

Tadashi nibbles his ear and turns to hold him. He peppers kisses on the side of his boyfriend’s cheek, earning a giggling from Ainosuke.

"What do you want to do?" Tadashi asks as his kisses trail down Ainosuke’s jaw. It was his idea to shower first, but now, it seems to be close to Ainosuke changed that.

"You know it already," Ainosuke’s voice was heavy with desire.

"You don’t need to ask, do you?" Ainosuke stares at Tadashi’s eyes, coquettishly. Tadashi pushes him down. Every gesture to take his top off makes the intensity of waiting higher. Tadashi takes his top off as well. Ainosuke could feel his lower half respond to the slow intensifying sweetness that starts to flood into the air. There is a certain stillness and tranquility in the act of undress. Usually, this stage was the fastest. Desperation always distracts the mind from the eroticism of being undressed. Now it was painfully slow and it made Ainosuke realize that this too could unveil all his vulnerabilities. He doesn’t mind it. Tadashi has always been the one to make him do the things he never thought he could do or ever allow others to do to him.

It’s always the feeling of being controlled in these situations that makes Ainosuke panic, after all, sex is where he can fully have control over himself. However, surrendering to Tadashi like this feels right. When he is kissed on the neck, Ainosuke can’t help but close his eyes to focus on the sensation of Tadashi’s mouth on his skin. This way it was easier to notice the wetness of his kisses, the way his bottom lip brushes against Ainosuke’s skin as well as how he pepper kisses down to his collarbone.

Ainosuke flinches when Tadashi puts his nipples inside his mouth. Tadashi licks it and then sucks the whole thing along with Ainosuke's areola. The wet sounds Tadashi makes as he continues to suck on his boob force Ainosuke to cling to Tadashi’s neck, moaning every time he hears the sound of mouth-sucking skin. It was not helping that the pressure Tadashi’s mouth gives his nipple was starting to send him tiny bolts of pleasure as the intensity increased. They did all of this before. The truth is, Ainosuke wasn’t expecting he would feel the same pleasure again but he does and it makes him worry that he could get addicted to this sensation. Before he could complain, Tadashi withdrew.

"What do you want me to do?" Tadashi asks. He looks at him with that puppy dog eyes of his and it makes Ainosuke feel even more concerned about his ability to deny this man anything.

Ainosuke’s thoughts are interrupted when Tadashi takes his dick outside of his pants.

"How do you want to feel good Ainosuke-sama?" Tadashi asks as he rubs Ainosuke’s cock.

They stare at each other for a while, holding each other’s gaze trying to figure out what the other was thinking.

"Do you want to hold me?" Tadashi says moving closer to invade Ainosuke’s face while still massaging the other’s hardening organ.

Ainosuke was a bit surprised at the question. It was like a wake-up call to bring him back to his senses. Now he got serious, a bit disheartened when he thought about how Tadashi wanted to be held too. He has fantasized about pinning him down at least once and he should be at least happy Tadashi was willing to let him hold him. However, Ainosuke sits up and bumps his nose with Tadashi. He gently runs his knuckles on Tadashi’s thigh. He can’t get the image of Tadashi’s troubled face from his mind. After hearing about what he had to go through the past years, he was afraid to make a mistake, so he lifts his eyes and says, "I want you to fuck me so hard I wouldn’t be able to stand."

Tadashi’s face turns red at his response. He didn't have much experience as a top. In his previous affair, he would be asked to top once in a while. He cannot deny that had tremendously enjoyed being the one in control every time it was like that, but having a partner that was aggressive even as a bottom left him with bruises from love bites. Redish marks would always be painted over his back. Sometimes nail marks are left there as well. This was not something he appreciates and hated once the effect of the medicine wore off. Ainosuke wasn’t as aggressive so Tadashi always enjoyed the few times that they’ve done it; of course, this is before guilt takes a hold of him to get a reality check. Tadashi doesn’t mind being marked and bitten like that if Ainosuke is the one doing it.

Having such a limited experience was difficult. He was still experimenting with things and is not confident he can give Ainosuke the pleasure that he wants. They still have a long way ahead of them. Exploring each other’s bodies. Knowing what the other wants will come in the long run. Now all they have to do is take it slow.

Tadashi plants a kiss on Ainosuke’s cheek. Like pressing a button, immediately, Ainosuke flustered like a tomato.

"Tadashi..'' Ainosuke stares at him with needy eyes. He hugs Tadashi tightly.

"You don't have to be slow or gentle with me.

"Fuck me the way you like. I don’t mind."

With that signal, Tadashi bites him on the neck. The bite sent shivers down Ainosuke's spine and made his whole body feel weak. He moans softly as Tadashi continues to kiss him. The kisses began to be accompanied by a hard lukewarm thing pressing inside his hole, trying to get in. Ainosuke was still soft from the intensity of their session the day before. The sensation made him remember the things they did and it resulted in his lower half getting erect to its full capacity. Tadashi whom he clung to, must have noticed because he mumbled a soft "sexy" right after.

As Tadashi continues to spread him, he feels his mouth water at Tadashi's sweet smell.

"You smell good." Ainosuke moans against Tadashi's ear as he tightened his embrace on his boyfriend. After a few seconds, he feels something larger enter him. When the tip tried to enter his hole, he couldn’t help but grab Tadashi by the shoulder as if he was afraid to be entered.

"You don’t want to?"

"Tada… wait…"

Tadashi tried to withdraw, but Ainosuke stopped him.

"I didn’t say I don’t want it!" Ainosuke said a bit desperate. His desperation surprised Tadashi a bit. He didn’t want to hurt him. If he thought he didn’t want to be penetrated this time around Tadashi would respect his wishes and retreat. Ainosuke was adamant though that he didn’t say he didn’t want it. His eyes, while glazed with lust were serious and honest.

"It’s just that, I’m afraid I’ll turn weird when you enter me again." A bead of tears starts to form at the corner of Ainosuke’s eyes. Tadashi found this devastating cute that he couldn’t help but lick the tear away. Ainosuke gasped at the gesture and shyly hid his face.

"Tadashi, you’re an idiot."

"Ainosuke-sama you were so cute I couldn’t help it," Tadashi says, happiness in his voice. Ainosuke could see an invisible tail wagging behind his boyfriend. He pouts and looks at him as if he’s forgiven him. Tadashi kisses the side of his eye again and thinks a bit. Why was Ainosuke afraid of feeling weird? After a few seconds, Tadashi understood. Sometimes things feel so good that you don’t want to do them out of fear of being controlled by it. He knew the feeling all too well and can relate to him.

"If you don’t want to, I won’t insist. I want us to feel good together."

"No. I didn’t say I don’t want to. I just… want you to enter me a bit slowly." Tadashi smiles and kisses Ainosuke on the cheek. He pushes himself against Ainosuke slowly but surely. Underneath him, Ainosuke feels like he is about to explode at how hot he feels as Tadashi enters him. Short breaths burn Tadashi's neck. Ainosuke opens his mouth and sucks on Tadashi’s shoulder. Tadashi winces as he feels Ainosuke's teeth scrape against his skin. Noticing this, Ainosuke withdraws and bites his lip instead, feeling a bit troubled that he hurt Tadashi. Tadashi looked unbothered though. Ainosuke rested his head on Tadashi’s shoulder and clamped his eyes shut as Tadashi continued to enter him. Ainosuke moaned a bit lewdly when Tadashi finally reached his sweet spot. It made Tadashi widen his eyes.

"Move…" Ainosuke said as he stares at Tadashi’s mouth and then ultimately grabs the other’s head for a deep kiss. It all felt too fast. Tadashi didn’t notice he was moving desperately against Ainosuke. He was distracted by how deep their kisses went and how everything felt good.

"Ainosuke-sama.. bite me." Tadashi pleads almost desperately when he finally was able to withdraw from the kiss to breathe.

"I don't mind if you mark me again and again." He adds. Ainosuke wasn’t sure he was aware of what he was saying. When it dawned on him, Ainosuke's flushed face flushed even more.

"Silly puppy~," Ainosuke says in between pants. The sweet scent Tadashi's skin was giving off was intoxicating. Ainosuke licks Tadashi's shoulder as he moves to complement Tadashi's thrusts, cowgirl style. The chiffon flesh made him feel like he was about to lose his cool. He licked Tadashi's neck and clamped his teeth down on the soft flesh, earning a surprisingly loud moan from the older man. Tadashi's moans were accompanied by spasms from the pleasure of Ainosuke's tightness. Ainosuke couldn't help but get off from that.

When he woke up he noticed that there was no one in bed with him. He searches for Tadashi and finds him on the balcony smoking. Ainosuke never actually saw Tadashi smoke. He walks to the balcony and stands beside his boyfriend. Close, but not too close to revealing how much he needed to feel loved right this instant.

The smoke from the cigarette wafted in the air. Ainosuke could practically smell the menthol in it. The sweet smell was no more, there was only a cold breeze and the far-off sound of the siren of cars that gave color to the stillness of the night.

Tadashi takes a drag and puffs. Ainosuke had no idea such an image could ignite unknown feelings in him. His boyfriend looked cool leaning over the balcony, taking a drag on his cigarette, and looking thoughtful. His pale skin seemed to glow as the streetlights illuminated him. The room where they slept together was dark in contrast to how well-lit the balcony was. Ainosuke sees the hickeys he left on the other's skin. There was some bruising on Tadashi's left shoulder. Ainosuke didn't notice he bit him there and felt somewhat guilty. He leans in and nudges the other's arm softly.

"You smoke too? I wasn't expecting that. Give me one. "

Tadashi gives a stick and a lighter to Ainosuke. Ainosuke takes the cigarette stick but instead of taking the lighter he grabs Tadashi by the back of his head and lights his cigar using Tadashi's cigarette. He takes a drag. The cigarette catches fire and sizzles. There was a kind of intimacy in this act. Without the cigarettes, it'd be like kissing. Ainosuke withdraws and puffs. When the smoke dissipates, he feels Tadashi wrap an arm around his arm. He studies him and finds that there is something like greed in Tadashi's green eyes.

"You still wanna go for another round?" Ainosuke teases. Tadashi shakes his head. His denial only makes Ainosuke excited. He faces him and points to his mouth asking to get a kiss. When Tadashi leans in, Ainosuke readily opens his mouth for his kiss.

There is a certain feeling that bubbles in his chest whenever Tadashi kisses him. It feels like every time he does, he's promising him forever. It's both freedom and a life sentence, with Tadashi shouldering the burden. Because the fact was, being with Ainosuke is probably going to be hard on Tadashi's part, rather than it being hard for him. This was one of the worries that randomly popped up in his head. His wandering thoughts are pulled down to earth when Tadashi stretches his mouth a bit forcefully to lick his fangs.

"Wait…" Ainosuke protests. Tadashi wasn't fazed, he continued to lick his teeth. After that, he prodded Ainosuke's tongue, and when he responded by raising it, Tadashi's tongue wrapped his tongue to kiss him more deeply. Ainosuke was caught off guard. Before he could get himself together, Tadashi withdrew leaving a wet plopping sound from the separation of their mouths.

Realizing that he was a bit aggressive Tadashi panicked.

"Sorry I just…" He stutters.

Ainosuke giggles and kisses Tadashi.

"Hmmm~ my little pup wants me."

Ainosuke bumps their noses together.

"You want to do it again?"

Tadashi nodded shyly.

—-

"Are you going back to the mansion?"

"Yes, I already called Natsuno."

"Then..." Tadashi steps forward and plants a kiss on Ainosuke’s cheek. "I’ll see you soon."

"Tadashi,"

"Hmm?"

"May I visit you?"

Tadashi was a bit surprised. He pinched Ainosuke’s arm softly. Staring into his boyfriend’s eyes he scolds, "What are you saying? Of course, you can come to visit me.

"I can’t go to the mansion yet until I sort things out with Take. But when it comes down to it…" Tadashi presses his lips.

"I won’t mind if you don’t work at the mansion anymore.

"You’ve done enough for our family." Ainosuke rubs Tadashi’s arm. "Maybe it’s better if you leave the mansion. We can become normal lovers who go on normal dates. It’ll be fun, don’t you think?

"I’ll miss you. I’ll miss sleeping beside you. But I can always visit you right?"

Tadashi takes a deep breath. "I don’t want that. I don’t want to be separated from you."

Tadashi presses his lips together. "I was just trying to be strong when I pushed you away. So don’t say we should separate. Now that we are finally together, we don’t need a reason not to be together. I want to be with you all the time."

Ainosuke sighs. "Okay. If my adorable puppy says so." He leans and plants a kiss on Tadashi’s mouth.

After a few minutes, Natsuno arrived. Tadashi waved goodbye but he was stopped. Ainosuke said, "We can drop you off at your place."

"Yes! Hop on Kikuchi-san."

Tadashi smiled and followed Ainosuke to the backseat.

Natsuno kept on glancing at Tadashi and Ainosuke in the backseat. They were talking in whispers but the air around the two somehow changed. Ainosuke sat closer to Tadashi. He didn’t notice this when he first drove them. His master was all smiley too.

When they dropped Tadashi off, his master waited until Tadashi disappeared into his condominium, before they left. He observed his master. There was no longer a heavy air that hovered about him. He seemed rather calm, and even content.

#fics #tadashi kikuchi #ainosuke shindo #sk8 the infinity #SK8THEINFINITY #sk8 tadashi #sk8 adam

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hollyhomburg · 2 years

Text

Before I Leave You (Pt. 29)

(Omegaverse au, Mafia au, Bts x Reader)

Summary: Jimin has three secrets, the first is that he’s a psychopath and the second is…

Tags: Flash back chapter, unreliable narrators, controversial characterization, psychopath Jimin, obsessive behaviors, yandere! jimin, morally questionable characters, guns, violence, gore, blood, murder, a brief drug reference or two, crime, first time smoking, depression, anxiety, hurt/comfort, medication for said depression, morally grey characters, Epilepsy, 4th wall breaks, vminkook focused, mild sexual content.

W/c: 13.0k

A/n: Several people guessed Jimin’s second secret in my ask box! but no one has guessed the third yet! i hope you enjoy it, i’m posting this immediately after getting my wisdom teeth removed~ so wish me luck! if certain parts of this this chapter seems like it’s intentionally vague or intentionally misleading thats the point- i try to write each character differently and jimin’s pov is written mostly in reference to tae- if it doesn’t involve tae (or one of his other loves) why mention it you know? this chapter is stylistic to say the least.

Previous Chapter - Masterlist

(Before you. Jimin, Tae, and Jungkook)

~-~

Jimin's second secret is that he has always known who Yoongi is.

Hang on, maybe we need to back up a bit.

There is a liminal space between good, evil, and the law. The spot where light becomes a shadow, between things that are right and wrong and non-necessarily unjust. The everyday average person likes to ignore the line for simplicities sake, say that there’s just one or the other- good and bad- but the truth is a lot more grey than that.

The truth is that people find their place on that line- build a home out of the in-between, people conduct whole lives without ever picking a side.

Jimin is one such person, a line rider with morals as grey as his hair.

As a psychopath, Jimin felt as though he was uniquely qualified to decide what was good and bad. If something was good; then it barely crossed his mind. And if it was bad then Jimin’s first thought would be that Taehyung could never know. His soulmate is his moral compass in every meaning of the word.

There is a lot of bad that Taehyung doesn’t know. Will never find out about if Jimin has anything to say on the matter.

As for Yoongi’s secret- Jimin isn't an idiot.

It stands to reason if some alphas and omegas exist above the law- that whole packs and people like Jimin road that fine line- then there must be betas that lived that way too. Jimin knew that men like Yoongi had to exist, that there had to be a beta at the top of every mafia hierarchy the same way that there was a beta in charge of every fortune 500 company and government from here to the equator.

After all, every kingpin needs their puppet master.

He just never expected the head beta of the most dangerous pack in the country to be someone he loved. He didn’t expect the highest-ranking member of the mafia- the one who had the final say in all decisions- to also be the man he teased by snapping the band of his underwear every morning.

The most powerful man in the underworld is also the man Jimin see’s pealing tangerines and fixing bookshelves in exchange for forehead kisses. The same man who snuck extra snacks into Tae's workbag and always made sure that jimin’s jacket was well scented by every member of the pack before that same trip too. the man that owned the name hovering on the edge of Jungkook’s lips whenever he was sad or in need of cheering up.

Jimin tastes the secrets on Yoongi's tongue every time he kisses him, feels them press overbearing on the edge of every rough laugh that the beta shares with them. A blessing and a curse to be loved. To be loved by people like Jimin and Yoongi. Neither good- nor bad, maybe that's why Jimin had never been able to blame him fully for leaving.

Good people can also love bad people, no one knows this better than Jimin.

(Hang on- am I skipping a chapter? Or is it you that skipped events? All I've ever asked of you is to pay attention- hang on- maybe we should back up a bit- No- this will due just fine.)

The older Jimin gets the more he understands the division between himself and others; the things that make him a little less human. Maybe there's a reason why he’s different; if you believe in things like fate.

There had to be a reason why he was born without a conscience and why the world made sure to give him one in the people he loves. Jimin will try to be a good person for them, for as long as it takes the good intentions to stick. Until Jimin learns how to be a real person- he has them.

But before then? Well... Jimin has a job to do.

Maybe I should back up a little bit- see, the thing is- Jimin hadn’t set out wanting to be an assassin but he hadn’t exactly avoided it when the opportunity came to him either. Most sane people would have run for the hills, but not Jimin.

When they graduated high school and Tae went off to university Jimin had been desperate to get out of their hometown and his closet-sized apartment above the martial arts studio. Cut off from their parents after the unfortunate events that had lead to both of them being outed unintentionally to their very conservative parents a week after graduation.

He’d been too poor to afford college let alone a one-bedroom apartment in Tae’s city. Tae had enough trouble sneaking him into his dorm room for extended weekends when Jimin scrapped enough money together for a train ticket, he could easily get thrown out of school for less than that.

The city of bright street lights and endless indulgences that Tae showed him in pictures was a tantalizing promise of everything Jimin wanted for his soulmate. There were few trees, unlike their home town with all its mountains and animals. A city full of hidden alleyways that Tae says he wants to write about, will one day when assignments aren't pinning down his free time like a butterfly between two peins of glass.

There are whole little worlds lined up neatly in rows of brick houses crammed on either side of uneven cobblestone streets. In Tae’s mind, they could hold anything; secret hidey holes of tawdry spies or magical menageries brimming with adventure and secret societies. Streets full of their fantasies and full of apartments that Jimin could not afford, not making minimum wage, not without a college degree, and not on his own.

It would be easier next year when Tae didn't have to live in the dorms like all the other freshmen- that way he and Tae could go 50/50 on rent (but even that wouldn’t be enough. Jimin’s alpha instincts demand that he should be the one to pay for most of it; he’s Tae’s pack alpha after all). For now, they’re doomed to daily calls and hourly texts, endless selfies, and making the 4-hour train ride back and forth.

Being separated from Tae always hurts, even when it’s just for a minute, it seems silly and too classic alpha- too possessive- but even when Tae goes to the fucking bathroom sometimes Jimin misses him.

A love so all-consuming it leaves Jimin baffled and hoping one day he won’t feel it all so much. a love that goes almost too deep, a love that has him counting the seconds and wanting extra.

(But it won’t get any easier when his obsession increases. If anything, having more people to love will only multiply Jimin’s frustrations. But you understand what it’s like to be in love with seven people so bad you can’t stand it, don’t you?)

Jimin clicks a stopwatch on his phone every time Tae slips from view at the train station. It doesn’t matter if he’s the one riding the tracks back or if he’s left standing alone at the station- being separated hurts either way. The longest they've ever gone without seeing each other is 41 days 18 hours and 32 minutes.

It’s harder than either of them let on. Maybe Jimin would feel better about it, would know to reign in his overactive imagination and heart if it wasn’t clear the distance didn’t bother Tae just as much. If his soulmate didn’t still call him every day and every night. If Tae’s breath didn’t get so heavy when he calls like he’s been dying to breathe, can’t without Jimin’s voice in the air.

“There’s this stinky alpha that sits Infront of me in anthropology lecture that I just can’t stand, he smells so gross, like rotting orange peels- you’d hate it.”

“I’m sorry I can’t be there to make it smell better baby” he can hear Tae’s pout through the phone, nearly feels it pressed to his own lips.

“Your sweatshirt barely smells like you anymore.” Jimin traces Tae’s side of his bed, his fingers finding imaginary hovels that could be from the few times Tae has slept in this bed, not like his old childhood bedroom where the foam topper and the room had soaked up traces of Tae’s cinnamon scent so that it smelled like him always. He wonders if his parents threw out his bed and his things, wonders what happened to Tae's book collection too, and if the old books in his collection that smelled like Jimin's scent were likewise discarded.

God- he’s about to go buy some spices just to get his scent a little closer, only his love for Tae would have him huffing a fucking spice rack.

“I'm looking for someone who doesn’t mind getting violent.”

There aren’t many martial arts studios in their small town, just this one and another that specialized mostly in kid's after school activities. The whole reason why Jimin was able to stay in the upstairs apartment was because he worked so many hours downstairs- enough to pay for his tiny room and the use of the showers whenever he might need them.

He’s been on his feet since opening, taught half a dozen classes even the pup classes which thoroughly took the last of his energy. Now he’s listing into a mop bucket, cleaning up the smell of sweaty alphas trying not to fall asleep standing because he stayed up too late talking to Taehyung again the night before and was liable to do the same tonight.

“Jimin!” his boss calls from the front, Jimin’s hands are so numb from punching the bag during boxing lessons that he drops the mop. He's blinking dumbly at the man in the front, nice suit, expensive BMW parked out front. (or at least expensive to Jimin, anything that wasn’t falling apart was more than he could afford)

“I think this man wants to talk to you.”

Jimin’s entrance into the world of private security was as easy as that. It never mattered much to him who he was guarding and if their fears for their safety were real or imaginary as long as they paid.

The pickings were admittedly slim in their small town, with no more than 100,000 people and very few who were willing to pay for something as frivolous as a bodyguard. After the imaginary danger passed with his first client and Jimin was left once again- penniless and without a job.

But he’d learned to use other aspects of himself to get hired. Pretty winks and being attractive was just as much a cultivated skill set as disarming moves and complicated achilleas locks. Jimin would never ever in a million years think of cheating on Tae (literally it's not in his DNA) but fixing that pretty smile on his face that Tae likes so much to charm potential clients is a necessary evil.

Thank God Tae taught him how to employ the delicate cadences of the upper class. How to tame his hair and how to look the part of 'handsome'. His good looks regularly decimate his employer's better judgment and did especially well paired with his cherubic grin that said, "yes I actually am worth that much an hour. And if I'm not at least you have something pretty to look at."

He'd shown Tae his first suit, black and a size tighter than it should have been to give the look of nice tailoring. "How do I look baby, like someone out of a spy movie?"

Tae had been choking on his words, stretched out in his narrow dorm room bed, a sight that any other day would make Jimin stammer and stare. throaty growl coming out like a tiger's purr. "Honey, you put James bond to shame."

It had only taken a few days for Jimin to realize that it was the easiest most boring job on the planet. In all reality being a bodyguard to people who only think they’re important is a lot of walking, a lot of standing, a lot of making sure you look threatening.

And all Jimin has to do to be absolutely chilling is peel back the version of himself that has learned to be normal for Tae. Letting the mask drop is easier then blinking and as thoughtless as making his heartbeat. Most people don't like it when he goes still and quiet, even the simplest of smiles doing nothing to get one in return.

(Most people don’t like it because Jimin grins like a monster showing his teeth, grins like he’s planning on ripping your throat out with his lips, and claim your blood and viscera as collateral for bothering him. He’s intimidating when he’s without Tae to soften his edges).

Jimin can’t blame them for being unsettled, he is a psychopath after all.

Jimin didn’t think much of it the first time he beat up a client’s ex-packmate because he’d slept with another omega. Free of guilt because he’d seen the alpha harassing other omegas multiple times. Was it really so bad to give the man what was coming to him? Was it really against the law to take from people who had so much?

It was easy to take on a little more work, intimidation, and a little bit of thievery here and there. The small things, and it only escalated from there.

Jimin gained a reputation in no time, a pretty face, and an even prettier pair of hands that you’d just love to see around someone’s throat. Not murder- not quite yet- but the world of the elite will always go soft and fond for a pretty alpha and throw scraps his way.

“Jimin, I have a favor to ask of you. Of course, I can trust you to be discrete, your recommendation said that you’d be…amenable to requests of certain standards as long as you’re properly compensated.”

“I seem to have lost my limited edition Berkin at my ex’s house, could you fetch it for me, Mr. Park?”

“It’s rather unfortunate that an alpha like that gets such a nice car, can you make it disappear for me Jimin?”

“He looked at my omega a little too long, I want you to hurt his pretty face.”

“Of course Mr. Delabruyere,” Jimin flashes a sympathetic smile, “Whatever your heart wishes Mrs. Schiffe,” a deep bow and his hand over his heart, “Right away Xiansheng.”

At first- when he and Tae were just barely scraping by crime was a necessary evil. Jimin used every extra penny to help pay Tae’s college tuition. After the first time, he’d gone to visit his soulmate after the second semester started all but cemented his decision to partake in a life of crime. He’d never seen bruises like that under Tae’s eyes before, never felt such shame when he learned that Tae had to take on 3 jobs just to pay what his scholarship didn’t cover.

Jimin caught him waking up early one morning, dabbing a bit of concealer under his before he started to work on one of his assignments. Had searched and found the tiny hidden in an empty bottle of shampoo. makeup to hide his tiredness, to make Jimin less concerned about his wellbeing

(at least, that's what Jimin thought- you and I know better).

Jimin hadn’t been able to say anything to him about it, the apology for not being a better alpha lodged in his throat like a too big bite of happiness. Jimin has been so obsessed with the idea of moving to Tae and curing his loneliness that he hasn’t really been worrying about easing Tae’s other discomforts. He’d apologized in the best way he knew how, by fucking the other alpha quietly to sleep, not stopping until Tae was so fucked out he slept for hours without even stirring. The insomnia worn out of him by a few blessed orgasms.

Growing up poor won’t ever quite leave them, the frantic nature to their love and their wanting. Jimin wants it all for Tae, every single minuscule bit of happiness, Jimin daydreams of a world where Tae gets everything he wants gets it and knows nothing of hard work.

But Tae’s lack of sleep also took away points and points off of his exams, so many little notes of “come and see me” “your ideas are a little too fanciful, focus them a little more and you might be able to get an A.” countless other little harsh notes that weren’t meant to hurt Tae- but undoubtedly had. Jimin has considered keying and/or stealing his professors cars as payment for such insults.

Mean people don’t deserve nice things in Jimin’s opinion, and people who make taehyung sad deserve even less.

After Jimin had seen how close Tae was to losing the little scholarship money he got, paying for Tae’s college became the sole focus of Jimin’s life. Tae loved learning, genuinely never missed a single lecture, and tore through the assigned reading material to ask his professors for more words to consume. Tae has always been a flagrant erudite- Jimin can’t see his dreams crushed, wouldn’t be able to bear it.

Taehyung just believed he’d been selected as the recipient of a very generous scholarship after his first year. 40,000 dollars a semester for tuition, 2,000 for books, and 5,000 for other living expenses which was more than enough to live on.

Or in Jimin’s language, about three or four favors for his clients and maybe a stolen car here and there every 6 months. Jimin wasn’t picky about what crime he committed as long as it was going to help pay to keep Taehyung happy. Jimin will do anything for the people he loves, and that’s part of the problem.

The first time he’d killed someone it hadn’t been on purpose.

Transporting his clients is easily the most dangerous and time-consuming part of his job, with long flights and long drives where Jimin finds it hard to relax. He’s used to it, used to plying his time and waiting until transport stops and he’s awarded a bit of free time which he can fill with texts to Tae.

Usually forgotten about near the back of the plane while his clients harass the stewardesses and get drunk near the front. Jimin always declines their offers of age-old whiskey and Cuban cigars in favor of his favorite drug.

“Send me a picture out the window! I want to see what it looks like from all the way up in the clouds!”

It’s dangerous to fire a weapon inside an aircraft, downright suicide if you want to do it while you’re flying, but luckily they haven’t taken off yet when the gun is being fired. The jamming pressure makes his fingers numb, gunpowder stings his nose. The percussive shock makes the muscles in his arms tingly for a second with the memory of the recoil.

Jimin has never smelled his own angry scent before, but Tae tells him he smells like gunpowder sometimes, something out of a James Patterson novel ‘an alpha that smelled like vengeance’ which was his favorite book for a brief stint in high school before Tae grew tired of the puffed-up adult versions of novels people like his father thought where the epitome of fiction- and found his true favorites in the fantasy and romance section of their local library.

But Tae always liked to imagine Jimin as the face of the protagonists, the good and bad, the morally grey characters, and the sympathetic villains that weren't villains at all.

"But didn't he like, kidnap her Tae?" "yes but! she really needed it, her fiance was like- the evilest dude, you'll just have to trust me Minnie it makes sense for the story, and their banter! its so so good i wish i could write like this."

Any and all love will always share Jimin’s face. Usually, the only time Jimin’s unhappy scent comes forward at all is when people cut them off in traffic or when someone accidentally brushes up against the two of them when they're in public. It feels strange to have it thrown back in his face even now, the smell of gunpowder and blood so thick he might choke on it.

Jimin doesn’t get angry often. But his angry scent smells like this, gunpowder and death.

Firing a gun is messy business even without the blood- Jimin can already feel the powder thick and coating his fingers. Jimin’s memory is a little shoddy, but he remembers the clamor. The scream when one of the flight attendants got stabbed and the crack of her neck breaking when the assassin put his hands on her neck in a way that seemed practiced, just a twitch of his wrists and she was gone. He remembers the knife, it coming at him but not at him as the man ran past him in the direction of his client.

The gun in his hand is hot enough that it burns his fingertips, He’d have to use gloves next time, or maybe he'd file down his fingertips so that he never leaves any trace behind. He’s only had his concealed carry license for barely a month and only gotten it at the request of his current employer, an old director who liked the privacy of the countryside and had apparently earned her fair share of enemies and required it of all her bodyguards.

Jimin had scoffed, writing her off as paranoid. But now he stares down at one of her enemies the whole back of his head blown out from a threw and threw 45 caliber bullet, and finds his assumptions corrected.

The man on the floor is non-descript. Brown hair and brown eyes that stare listlessly at the wall forever now. Assassins never look the same way twice.

This was supposed to be just a trip to an award show- this director's first one in a while. Something about a prestigious award stolen right out from under a competitor's nose He’d heard conversations about it from the director and her posy enough times to know the loose story behind it. Certainly not enough to kill over in Jimin’s opinion- but then again he is the one who’s going to end up killing people for money so who is he to judge?

He hadn’t even second-guessed his decision to fire the gun, hadn't spared an inch of thought before he'd pulled the trigger. But now with the man dead in front of him, terror thunders through Jimin’s entire being.

So this is it, this is how he and Tae are finally separated.

This is worse than what happened in grade school- Jimin is probably going to go to jail for this. Well, maybe not if the self-defense charges stick but at the very least Tae will know. Will realize for the first time that Jimin- Jimin isn’t like him, and then he might not love him and Tae would go off and live alone and- he can’t. He can’t be without Tae.

His chest is heaving with the idea of it, the fear. Tae’s love is the only thing that keeps him human, his one tether as sure as a red string of fate.

The bullet didn't just take that man's life but Jimin’s world with it too.

Jimin can't breathe, can't think through the tightness in his chest, the off-kilter tilt to the world thinking about Tae- TaeTae- always Tae. Not being able to touch him, not being able to hear his voice whenever he needs to, not having Tae in his life at all wouldn’t be a life worth living at all.

Will Tae still love him? When he finds out that Jimin has taken a life? Will he still want to touch his cheeks stained with the soul of another? Will he still kiss at his bruised knuckles if he knows his hands are soaked with blood?

He looks down at the man and feels no lurching in his stomach, no fear or shame or guilt directed at the life extinguished. There’s a weird sense of impermanence to it, Jimin pulled that trigger- and the man on the other side died. A cause and effect. Nothing more than that.

While Jimin's whole life spirals down the drain, His employer drops onto the couch at the back of the aircraft, wiping out a cigarette and lighting it. She’s equally as unaffected by the sudden screeching quiet but then again- betas are always a little hard to read.

She blows out the first puff of smoke once she really gets the cigarette going and it joins the haze of gunfire. The man on the floor gives a gurgle and then goes truly silent. There is a perfect fleck of blood or lipstick left of her nose. The rest of the cabin is not so lucky, it's wrecked. The ceilings are stained with blood and most of one wall drip with it- but at least the seats are leather. That will be easier to clean.

His heart pounding in his ear is the only indication that anything happened at all. He waits- waits for her to call the police. The echoes of the pilots and the omega flight attendants still ring in his ears. The pilot's commotion is distant. Jimin re-holsters his gun, he feels like that might make them more comfortable.

He wonders if this is what it’s like to be without a soul- what kind of person doesn’t feel anything when they kill another? What kind of monster is he? Jimin waits- willing himself to feel something- anything at all but panic at the idea of being separated from Tae. But there isn’t anything in his chest. He feels absolutely frozen.

He wipes the blood from his face and doesn’t look at the wetness on his palm.

His client just sighs, He waits for her to call the police but she only enjoys her cigarette, finishing the first and lighting another. Her eyes flicker up to Jimin's impassive, Jimin can usually see past that thin veil of pleasure or pain that most people have, see the hatred or the fear but not with betas.

She waits for a quarter of a moment, or maybe it's a full minute, either way, Jimin holds his breath. Eventually, she sighs, “I guess we’ll have to call the clean-up crew then.”

Jimin splutters, voice startlingly flat. “You have a cleaning crew?”

She scoffs, tossing him her phone. “It’s on speed dial, press 7.”

The conversation is short and perplexing, the dial tone beeps three times before someone picks up. The woman on the other side of the line exhales with a tired sigh, "la Famiglia pizzeria, pick up or delivery?”

"Uhm, are you-"

The woman’s voice grating, long island accent thick and annoyed, "Pick up or fucking delivery kid?"

"Delivery I think?" the tired sigh on the other end, like this woman has dealt with too many newcomers tonight. Too many people that don’t know how to order crime scene pick up and be discrete about it.

"How many are you feeding tonight?"

"one- just-" his boss gestures to the dead flight attendant like she's waiting for Jimin to finish up already. "Two! two actually."

"I recommend our classic cheese, how much sauce do you want?"

Jimin casts a glance around the cabin and its wrecked interior, "alot, as much as one person could physically put on a pizza."

He gives her the address, "our delivery times are good tonight, please wait 3 hours for us to get to your location." He listens to the dial tone for a few breaths. During the time which his boss scoffs again, putting out her cigarette on the leather seat with a faint hiss before she lights another.

"You could have just asked for the special. Would have taken 30 seconds tops."

"I don't want to know what that means."

Jimin flops down onto the couch next to his client. Tipping his head back against the couch, his nose and his body aching for someone who is halfway across the world and will never know about this.

Tae can never ever know about this.

He holds out his hand, “give me a puff of that.”

That had finally made him nauseous, his first cigarette and first-time smoking anything. He’d coughed and coughed and his boss had laughed when he pulled a face. DNA hadn't mattered she'd told him after she'd poured him a shot, The cleaning crew will take care of everything, and the pilot and flight attendants compensated and threatened to purchase their silence.

When Jimin asked her why, why was she doing this, why was she saving him from near-certain jail time- she'd only shrugged.

"I have 22 hours until I need to be in Los Angeles so you might as well enjoy my good graces while they last." She reaches for the cigarette but Jimin holds it out of her reach, she huffs and lights another. “And I guess you did just save my life so you’ll have it for a good few hours if you’ll lucky.”

They’d spent the next 3 hours getting drunk, Jimin had drunk so much that he hadn’t even realized when he’d blacked out. When he’d woken they’d been touching down in La, the whole plane jostled as they hit the tarmac.

The inside of the plane scrubbed so clean that he’d half questioned if he’d just dreamed it up. but then he looks down at himself and found his shirt missing. his boss laughs at his confused expression, “you had a bit of blood on you, I hope you don’t mind. i’ll have a fresh one delivered for you before we hit the red carpet, do you like Dior or Versace better Mr. Jimin?”

Jimin had tried to scrub away his hangover with the back of his hand. his boss is still drunk, high too from the looks of her pupiles dilated. one of the flight attendants- the only one left alive is passed out in a nearby booth. Jimin hopes her memory is as foggy as his when he wakes.

“Neither, whichever, do you have any water?”

He doesn't remember anything about the clean-up crew or the body bags. the only hints that remains of the crime is the faint smell of bleach filling the cabin. Though he does find a business card in his lapel pocket.

Neat little gold writing, ‘Min family group; Business Consulting’ and a number that he doesn’t call because Jimin can have nothing to do with this, not if he’s to stay by Taehyung’s side forever.

The rest of the weekend had gone off without a hitch, Jimin had tolerated the blinding lights of the paparazzi. Waited in the wings of the stage for his client to collect her award, and then babysat her through his pounding headache and another night of debauchery In which she’d tried and been unable to convince him to drink again.

“You’re a lot less stiff when you’re drunk you know? Did you ever punish the dude who put that stick up your ass or where you born with it Mr. Jimin?”

Jimin had kept his voice purposefully dry, “born with it I’m afraid.”

Jimin has a feeling that saving her life had done more to endear his current to him than he'd ever imagined. She still sends him a Christmas gift every year, usually a pair of heavy designer gloves and a simple Christmas card that always said, ‘don't ruin these too quickly.’

Despite his failure to contact the ever allusive Min family consulting group, they’d eventually contacted him. Because anyone who can make such a shot between the eyes at a moment’s notice was worth being on someone’s payroll, and apparently the disposal company regularly handed off the information of their killers in case they were likely to do that on a contract basis.

They’d done their research, and according to their analysts- Jimin’s talents were lost to the world as just a simple bodyguard.

Jimin has to admit that even on a good day his job is boring- but safe. Safety and staying alive for as long as he can for the people he loves matter more to Jimin than just about anything else.

It just matters a little bit less than keeping them all happy and plied with the comforts of life, nice apartments and good food, nesting materials, and courting gifts for Jungkook when he comes into the picture.

Maybe you’re only a psycho if you don’t care who you kill, and Jimin- Jimin cares. If not for the sake of his own soul then for those he loves. Jimin doesn’t believe in heaven, but if he did he’d want to be with them forever. If the gods above decide Jimin is not worth heaven, he will claw his way through the back door. Slither and seep under the pearly gates.

For Taehyung- he’d do anything.

Maybe death won’t be like the pearly gates at all. Maybe it will be more of a weighing of the hearts. And Jimin feels light enough with love to cancel out his own sins- their love makes him feel lighter than a bird.

(But Jimin is not a bird, he is not small and gentle and soft- that would be you. Jimin is something that eats soft and small things, a feather hanging from his mouth with fangs- no- Jimin is a snake. Particular about where he makes his den, a killer- but one who needs the warmth of others to survive properly.)

It’s easy to fit his occasional hits around his usual clientele, especially once he gets hired by the entertainment company and their rookie idol group. He doesn’t kill for them, they’re too pitiful- a bunch of scattered divas to Jimin, but it’s reliable and the simple work lets his mind wander. It's is a fine cover for what he actually does with the amount that they trave).

The weeklong assignments never arouse too much suspicion in Tae either since most of them are interspersed with legitimate trips. Jimin’s even started making enough that he doesn’t have to excuse the extra income and hide it as well as he used to. He’s almost as well-known as a bodyguard as he is an assassin with an impressive list of recommendations.

Jimin has a stare that would top would be stalkers in their path, Jimin’s smile is so creepy that even my dog doesn’t like it, hire him and you won’t regret it. I only feel safe when Jimin is near.

Maybe we need to back up a bit again, third time's the charm.

Every mafia keeps at least one assassin on its payroll and Jimin is only one of five other people that he knows kills for the family. Not just any family but the family, the one who runs 90% of the drugs from Miami to Portland. The one that owns the fighting rings in Georgia and manages the omega trafficking through Washington dc.

Of course, an organization that large and embedded into society would need a killer or two, or 5 regulars. Jimin's only ever heard the name of the others in passing always by alias and never by their real names (That kind of thing is kept under wraps). But he knows enough about the wolf, the spider, the swan, and the bee to make his own blood curdle.

Each of them has their own specialties- their own use to the family. Jimin is nothing more than the muscle; a violent, quick, and efficient killer meant for deaths that don't need to be perfectly hidden or cultivated to happen at the right time; his kill is so occasional and a rarity so simple that the others might as well not dirty their hands with it.

Jimin knows he costs 1/3 as much as the others do, a bargain-basement variety assassin, the on-sale version, the cheap replica. He’s the lowest assassin on the pack's totem pole and he needs it that way.

He won’t kill lay people, people who haven’t done anything wrong or were just in the wrong place at the wrong time. It’s his own morals- however slight but if Jimin cares who he kills it’s just because he thinks it would matter to Taehyung. The family was surprisingly understanding of Jimin’s own squeamishness; on his entrance interview Jimin had even filled out a checklist of the kind of targets he'd preferred.

They were terribly organized and terribly corporate, more business-like than anything the media could dream up. Jimin had expected to meet with his potential employer in some back room- not a corporate office in the middle of downtown. There were no racks of guns or rooms full of contraband just rows of grey cubicles and secretaries answering phones.

Women, children, cats, dogs, alphas who were evil, and omegas that weren’t. The man who had facilitated Jimin’s hiring had looked down at the papers jimin had signed, only two boxes checked out of the two dozen descriptions of possible targets. ‘omegas who have committed serious crimes’ and ‘alphas who have committed serious crimes" checked off. He hadn’t seemed displeased at all giving Jimin a small smile, saying “We can work with that.”

There isn’t anything more dangerous than a pissed-off or unhappy employee- especially when it comes to an assassin.

Over the years he's pieced together information about his contemporaries; none of them seem to have the same squeamishness that Jimin does when it comes to killing. The wolf doesn’t mind killing children, or innocents. The swan was better at killing in public than even Jimin and pretty too apparently earning her name.

The Bee was a fan of the quiet kill; the needle in pillowcases, the poison laced into a biscuit at the local coffee shop that a target frequented with a delayed release so that they were miles or countries away by the time a target was dealt with. A drop of a paralytic in a favorite bottle of whiskey. Heart attacks are so excusable these days with the rise of so much toxic food. The kind of kill the coroners didn’t often catch.

And the spider handles mass casualties, gang wars, an expert at all kinds of killing and getting out alive. he handles kills that aren't done with guns at all; the kind that needs a particular flare; that needs to be loud and send a message. Bombs and arson are just so much fun for men like that- men who relish in the bloodletting.

From what Jimin knows, the wolf, the swan, and the spider do most if not all of the pack's contract kills, you get a better price if you don't hire out to hitmen, and they're less likely to talk to the feds too.

Maybe Jimin is a little bit of a psycho but he's not stupid, he compiles a list of everything he knows to cover his ass. The only way to really hide information is if you never write it down but Jimin recites the long lists of facts that he knows about the others before and after every hit.

And sue him, he finds murder impressive, it's his career after all.

In all reality, Jimin isn’t needed most of the time, only when the deaths don’t need to happen quietly or quickly, and don’t need to look like an accident. The rare kind of death that doesn’t need to be a complete secret, the lazy kills that are absent of glamor or notice.

Not an accident, just another casualty of those lawmakers that do too little to keep guns off the street and have too much blood money lining their pockets. How many politicians are in the pocket of the family after all? How deep does the organization go? It could be none and it could be everyone and it wouldn’t make a difference. They’re still all going to get away with it.

The mafia trains him too, gives him weapons, teaches him how to use a sniper rifle, how to use an m12 accurately without actually making a fool of himself. teach him and give him more weapons than he could even dream of keeping at their apartment.

Even if it's not required of him jimin doesn't like to make a fuss. A bullet to the back of the hea while a target sleeps will do most of the time, and if that doesn't work then a knife to the chest in a crowded train station does just as well, or pushed in front of a train period if jimin feels like being messy.

But Jimin prefers the kind of deaths that happen on the long end of his sniper scope. The ones that don’t feel personal and up-close so he doesn't have to feel them before they die.

Maybe his soul isn’t completely damned if the people he kills only deserve it and he doesn’t seek it out more than he needs to. Killing people has always been something to pad the pack's pockets with, getting them through from one busy time to another. It was his first contract kill that allowed him to finally move to Taehyung, get them a pretty apartment with bay windows and built-in bookshelves for Tae’s collection.

Jimin was nothing if not the classic alpha- protect and provide, protect and provide on repeat in his head. and the killing felt worth it when he and tae finally moved back in together again, finally under the same roof where they never had to hide good night kisses or keep a careful distance cuddling on the couch. a place that was just theirs- a place where they where free to love.

it felt like it was worth it when he got to spin Tae around in circles in their little kitchen. when got to curl up with him on their big king sized bed, neither of them had ever had a bed so large to themselves before- used to squeezing together on singles. Somehow they always find themselves just as close- Tae says he can’t sleep without feeling Jimin all over him.

And then Jimin came home one morning a day early from his last job and found an unrecognizable pill bottle on Tae’s nightstand- usually tucked away in the safety of his school bag, a place where Jimin would never think of snooping because Jimin respects Tae’s privacy.

Citalopram, 50 milligrams. He snoops around and finds some records, a shitty school psychologist and Tae- struggling to cope with the stress of college. It’s easy to plant microphones in her office. To steal her personal files on Tae. Jimin respects Tae’s privacy enough to not search through his things- but not enough to let it go when it’s clear Tae must be hurting- that there must be something wrong. something that jimin can do to make it better.

Planting a microphone might be just an edge over the line, but Jimin justifies that it's just for taehyung. Just to make sure he's okay.

“I feel like I can’t be enough for my-” he stumbles the way he always does whenever someone asks who Jimin is to him, alpha/alpha phobia is still too present in society to be entirely transparent about their relationship. “-my packmate anymore, I feel like we barely see each other and sometimes when he goes on his trips, I get so lonely that it hurts. I feel like one day he’s going to leave me behind, I can’t stop thinking about it, him gone and me alone, it keeps me up at night.”

The other notes written in the files are just as concerning; depression, anxiety, childhood trauma, insomnia written in small little writing that Jimin tears up with his fists, it makes him so angry he can’t see through the tears in his eyes, a deja-vu feeling of wetness at his cheeks.

And Tae- always Tae- lonely. Tae- sad. Unforgivable and despicable. If God was real Jimin would tear him limb from limb. No matter how much Jimin wants to tell Tae that he could never- ever in a million years leave him. He can’t let Tae know what he’s done.

No matter the blood money and his budding crime career, Jimin is a fucking failure. He tries to stay home more often and tries to make the trips as quick as possible. But Tae can only go to sleep on his own so many nights in a row before he can’t sleep at all and planning murders takes 3 days minimum. There is only one solution that Jimin can think of.

Jimin would do anything for Tae to make him happy, including letting another person into their home.

Jimin already owns Tae in every way that matters and Jimin- Jimin is Teahyung’s monster threw and threw. Alphas are supposed to want omegas after all, they’re supposed to need them- that’s the whole point of ruts and heats. Neither of them can biologically sate the itch in each other’s brains, neither of them can make a nest.

Not in the way an omega can.

Jimin does some research in his spare time and finds that there are even psychological journals and scientific studies on the effects of nesting on alpha physiology. Alphas that have access to omega nests have a reduced likelihood of heart disease and higher self-reported rates of happiness. A slew of other positive effects, less anxiety, longer life spans, and lower levels of cortisol.

All Jimin wants is for Tae to be happy, he can put up with a weak ditzy omega for a while, forever maybe, if it means they put a smile on Tae’s face.

If there's one thing that Jimin's learned about managing his tendencies it's that he needs to work out. Even if he's not working he at least needs something physical to run the rat race of his brain ragged to the point where he didn’t think about getting evicted if he didn’t kill someone next month, or how Tae was even more stressed now in his senior year than he’d been in his junior.

He hadn't been looking for an omega for Tae. But when he first saw the black-haired omega at the gym squatting as much as he Jimin weighed, the smell of honey dripping across his forehead and filling the room with the scent of an omega all he thought was, ‘Tae would like this one.’

But Jeon Jungkook is not a ditzy omega, and he’s not a weakling either. The strength in his arms is both an added benefit and a potential threat. Though Jimin spends more time staring at the muscles in his legs and ass than the ones on his arms. At least maybe, if Jimin's not there and something happens there will be someone to protect Tae.

It’s a little funny how quickly Jimin becomes fixated on the idea of jeon Jungkook. How quick his gaze gravitates toward him and how quickly he starts to fantasize. he breaks into the gym after hours and finds jungkook’s employee files, finds his address, his age, his everything. It’s too easy to run a background check on him after than and find that he’s disarmingly normal, not a single red flag.

Jimin makes sure to time his workouts with Jungkook’s hours, makes sure not to wear scent blockers and watches as the omegas nose wiggles cutely whenever Jimin hovers near. He knows he smells good when he's happy and it's easy to let his thoughts wander to Taehyung whenever he's around Jungkook.

Its easy to approach him one day, “I'm not sure I know how to use this machine, would you mind showing me…”

Jungkook had licked his lips, eyeing Jimin up and down- “Jungkook- my name's jungkook.”

It's probably bad to admit that his initial interest in Jungkook had only gone as far as his ulterior motives. It had been easy enough to flirt with him after their casual comments turned them from acquaintances into gym buddies. Jimin knows how to be seductive, knows how to charm omegas by bringing Jungkook sugary muffins and coffees just cuz, knows by the way that Jungkook’s scent sweetens whenever he grows near that the omega is attracted to him.

Whenever Jimin holds the bar for him during his squats or the way his hands smooth down his back to correct his posture a faint blush forms on the omegas cheeks, enough that Jimin lets his hands Linger a second longer than they should. The omega jokingly picks him up when Jimin complains his legs are turned to jelly by their squat circuit, nuzzling into his hair before he thinks better of it and gently puts Jimin down.

“Sorry, my heats soon, you just smell so nice hyung.” Jungkook is terribly transparent. And Jimin knows Tae likes it when people wear their hearts on their sleeve, he’s perfect for Tae.

And Tae does like the omega, he likes Jungkook’s scent when Jimin steals his black sweatshirt under the guise of switching theirs ‘accidentally’ knowing that if Jungkook brought his scent back to his nest he’d think about Jimin for his entire heat.

Tae liked him even more when he accompanied Jimin to the gym one afternoon- because Jimin actually had ended up talking to Tae about the medication, not hurt and not accusing him of hiding anything, just worried about his soulmate.

exercise only goes so far to help depression but Jimin can’t not try, “It will help, I promise if it doesn’t help you fall asleep tonight we don’t have to come back.”

But Tae was honestly just happy to spend time with Minnie, and Jimin might have sent a cautious smile to Jungkook, Jungkook whose heavy eyes flitted from Jimin to Tae, and spread into a tentative smile. Showing his teeth, rounded and not at all sharp, like a kitten with cut claws.

cute

As Jimin had predicted- they hit it off, talked on the treadmills until Tae’s legs had started to shake, talking about game of thrones and other media that they liked. Tae doing his usual “the books are so much better, I'm still holding out for the ending of course, and the fight moves in them are so cool- jiminie likes to act them out when he wants to be sexy for me.”

And then Tae- noticing his mistake, “not that we’re-“

Jungkook’s smile makes Tae’s heart beat fast, Jimin can tell from the way his alpha straightens up at it; Posturing, however slight. moving to protect jimin from a perceived threat. “It’s okay, my roommate’s an omega and she’s coupled off with another one, how long have you and Minnie been together?”

Tae’s smile is wrapped around their love, “Since forever.”

Jungkook acted in similar approval when the topic drifted to Jimin’s job “you didn’t tell me you were a bodyguard hyung! And you didn’t tell me about Tae Tae either, do you save all your best secrets for last?”

“Guarding rich brats isn’t as fun as it sounds, but if you find it impressive then I guess it’s the most dangerous job in the world pup.”

Jungkook’s eyes flitter up and down Jimin’s body, appraising with a calculating eye, but not a judgmental one. Very few people seem to know the difference between judgment and calculation, and Jimin finds himself unintentionally endeared. If he had to use one word to describe Jungkook it would be honest.

And that might just be an asset where Tae’s concerned- especially given the secret therapist meetings and pill bottles. (maybe jimin’s not as smart as he thinks he is, seeing as the pill bottle was the first time he’d ever considered that taehyung could be lying to him). Jimin could use an ally, especially one he doesn’t have to worry about lying to him.

“I bet I could take you, I might be an omega but I promise I'm strong.” A flirtatious scuffle, where jungkook let himself be pinned, tilted his neck in a practiced way. This omega didn’t mind getting riled up around alphas, didn’t mind submitting, and even wanted it. It made the tiny infinitesimal part of Jimin that felt guilty for using him to make Tae happier just a little bit better.

When Jimin had looked up, he found Tae watching them, eyes wide and pupils dilated, his chest heaving a little, his scent turning from cinnamon to sweet spiciness in the way jimin knows he gets when he's turned on.

Tae had gasped through an orgasm later while they talked, chanting, “you like him- don’t you Minnie? fuck he's-” and Jimin had growled into his ear while he set a punishing pace. “I like him if you like him Tae,”

Tae’d started going with Jimin to work out after that, but the habit had only stuck long enough for Jungkook to start coming home with them after for takeout. Just like Jimin predicted Jungkook and tae where quick friends, and fast lovers.

Tae deserves legions of people to love, endless attention, and endless kisses, he deserves jungkook, who smiles pretty and wakes up all stretched out and ready for a knot or two when their flirtations finally turn from just that into a real romance.

But jungkook also has more devilish needs, kinky needs that Tae cannot fulfill. And really- Jimin’s good at scratching that itch in him the brutal pace and hurtful words that Tae has always been too gentle for, too unsure of himself to conjure up.

Jimin doesn't mind being a dom for Jungkook as long as he stays around for Tae. Even if it’s selfish, he doesn’t mind putting a pretty little collar on Jungkook’s throat if it keeps him sated. even if Jimin has to admit that sometimes he likes it a little more than he should, that it settles something in him when he comes home and finds jungkook already waiting by the door, his collar around his throat.

but it's more than that, Jimin doesn't mind the way it feels when jungkook lies his head on his lap and asks for Jimin to run his fingers through his hair. Jimin doesn’t mind the countless little freckles that coat the omega's body and doesn’t find it strange when he stops to count the freckles there because he counts Tae’s freckles all the time.

Jimin dosen’t mind jungkook at all. Likes him even, searches for him around the apartment in a half-asleep stupor on the mornings he leaves early for his classes at the gym.

Jimin even starts to look forward to getting videos of the two of them when he's on his work trips; taehyung cuddled up in Jungkook’s nest on their too large bed which is just the perfect size with the three of them, holding jimin’s pillow to his chest, dead asleep. The omegas soft voice lulling jimin into a sense of security; at least tae is taken care of this time, while he’s gone. at least taehyung has jungkook when Jimin’s not there.

"took me a second tonight hyung, but operation make Taetae sleep more is a success!"

"Thank you puppy" Jimin's day had been full of planning, walking circles around a target's apartment block and marking out cameras and lines of sight. tomorrow, tomorrow another life will be snuffed out by Jimin's hands. But for tonight there is only jungkook and his love, in a nest two states away.

The video shows Jungkook running his fingers through tae's hair, and Jimin's heart swells with love, it grows thicker when jungkook giggles, watching jimin’s eyes flutter through the phone. "you call me puppy alpha when you're the one falling asleep on me hyung."

Jimin yawns, "Sorry, these hours always kick my ass,"

"Do you miss us alpha?"

"Of course I do pup," it's not a lie. Jimin does miss the two of them, enough that his heart thuds with relief the next day when his plan goes off without a hitch and before he knows it he's on a plane home.

Jungkook serves his purpose well. Jimin was right to choose him for Tae.

Who is Jimin to deny his favorite person more love, especially because Jungkookie is so ready to give it? The nest he makes in their apartment has Tae sleeping a full eight hours for the first time in months, the nest makes him throw away his pills after the 3rd month they court him because he doesn't need anymore. He doesn’t have room to be anxious about anything anymore because as much as Jimin won’t admit it- he’s fucking good at courting and Jungkook will be theirs, it's only a matter of time.

There had never been a need to court Tae because Tae had been his from the beginning. But courting Jungkook becomes something of a game. Jimin creates fake raises, plucks the expensive leather jacket off a Dior shelf, he tells Tae he lucked out at the thrift store and tries not to feel a little proud when Jungkook wears it everywhere. Asks them both to scent it so that it carries them with him wherever he goes so that all those stupid alphas at the gym know jungkook’s spoken for.

There are other gifts, sugary donuts and coffees brought in just after Jungkook’s first class so that jimin can scent mark him before he goes off to his clients (mostly other alphas). Food sates the itch in Jimin’s skin and takes care of the provide part of protect and provide.

Teasing jabs of “Are you trying to fatten me up hyung?” turns into “I want to make you ready for our pups kookie- have to be healthy enough for Tae and I to breed.” Hissed low during Jimin’s rut.

A rut that Jimin makes sure jungkook knows he doesn’t have to help him through- Tae’s rut is one thing, But Jimin has never enjoyed his ruts, how the haze makes his mind all buttery. How his instincts seem too close to the surface, makes him want to write 'mine' with his teeth all over Jungkook and Tae.

Is possessiveness the same thing as love? Jimin’s instincts seem to think so.

“What are you talking about alpha? Of course I'm gonna stay for your rut? You’re acting weird Minnie.”

Tae had been a good diversion, “Jimin just doesn’t want to scare you off, the truth is- he gets a little crazy in his ruts, just about throws me over his shoulder and sniffs me down like a puppy. Maybe he doesn't want you to see how soft he gets in the after.”

Jimin's rut does go off without a hitch, and he ends it by lying his body over both of them, one arm around either of their waists, pinning them to the nest with his body so that neither one of them can move.

Dates that they go on separately and together are also ripe for showing Jungkook what they have to offer as a pair. Jimin rents a motorcycle for an evening and drives jungkook around the city on the hottest night of the summer. Wind whipping in their faces and tearing a wildness from Jungkook's chest, the freedom he hasn't yet seen hasn't yet tasted but shouts to the wind at the feeling. Jimin's body Relaxes a little more with every minute Jungkook’s arms are around him, just a little.

Later jungkook will confess that that moment is when he fell in love with Jimin. Drawing a satisfied smirk to the alpha's face. “Really? A little bit of adventure is all it took?” the same kind of teasing that always makes Jungkook melt.

The thing is, Jimin didn't expect to incorporate another obsession into his life.

It hadn't taken him long to learn Jungkook's favorite take-out orders, to learn that he might be capable of looking after himself but he didn't necessarily want to all the time. to learn the way he liked to have his clothes folded, to stare and stare at the way his hair curled over his forehead while he napped and nested.

He hadn’t expected to obsess over another person, to have his brain filled with images of jungkook and Tae kissing, Jungkook and Tae playing with each other's hands on the couch, jungkook nuzzling into Tae’s neck while he was still asleep, or sitting in his lap over breakfast, and the way that the blush on his soulmates neck had traveled slowly down every time they kissed.

Jimin obsesses over the kiss of Tae's pink-tipped cock nudging at Jungkook's soaking hole. Obsesses over the sweet honey slick dripping in slow motion. Wants to take photos to better remember jungkook lapping up Jimin’s cum from Tae’s stomach and the way the omega had let out a visible shudder at the taste of both of them on his tongue. He savored the way jungkook looked after cumming once on Tae’s knot once and twice on Jimin’s.

He devours jungkook sneezing, Jungkook’s cute little nose scrunch, the way he shifts his weight from one foot to the other when he's under stimulated, that time he’d gone to pack his lunch and found an entire bag of carrots in there- earning him the pet name of bunny. Jimin's bunny and Jimin's taehyung. jungkook with his soft bunny soul that Jimin will keep safe forever.

Jungkook- Jungkook- Tae and jungkook- jungkook and Tae. Tae- Tae Tae-

Tae and Jungkook are Jimin’s two obsessions. Jimin's mantra of Anything for Tae easily became anything for Tae and Jungkook.

Jungkook, who stands up one morning, teetering on his feet, dizzy enough that Tae has to catch him, a few days before their relationship was bound to change forever- in more ways than one. the first time he’d had a seizure and the firs time they’d meet their future alpha.

"sorry, I stood up into one of the machines yesterday and banged my head a bit,"

taehyung had been more concerned than Jimin, "Are you sure you're okay bunny?"

"Yeah! there's not even a lump, I'm just clumsy hyung."

If they had to pinpoint the start of the seizures, maybe it would have been there.

Jimin was used to fucking Jungkook into overstimulation and regularly rung as many as 5 or 6 orgasms from him in a single session. jimin will never get used to it- this need- this need to make his packmates cum and cum so much that they're begging for less and not more. jimin likes to hide the fact that it strokes his ego when Tae and Jungkook call him the best they've ever had- but he has to live up to that each time.

He didn’t notice the first twitch- writing it off as just another peak to the many highs he was giving the omega. But then the second twitch happened, and then a third, Jungkook’s eyes rolled into the back of his head that made Jimin realize the twitching wasn’t... predictable- that it wasn’t normal.

It takes Jimin a handful of seconds to realize it's a seizure- that the trembling in his limbs doesn't time itself with Jungkook’s body clenching on his knot, Taehyung had reacted quicker, jumping onto the bed and screaming at Jimin to help him turn Koo on his side so that he doesn't choke on his tongue.

No- no- not jungkook- not their kookie. Neither of them can live without him. and he’s dying, face turning blue and teeth mashing together. limbs not moving right- not moving the way they do when he’s alive and.

And then he’s still- but breathing, cheeks going from blue to sallow white then pink, and Jimin is screaming his name.

He remembers looking down at kookie in his hospital bed after an enigmatic man named Dr. Kim had told them an overnight stay was necessary to monitor Jungkook for any more unusual brain activity.

(Dr. Kim was a little annoying in Jimin’s opinion- maybe it was the fact that Jimin’s instincts just wouldn’t shut up around mind you, every time the man looks at him Jimin’s internal clock feels like it’s being spun, like time is going too slow and too quick all at once, seriously it's so annoying).

He'd been hooked up to censors, neat little white tabs under his hair, and the beeping machines an uneven lulaby. It's not the first seizure and not the last according to doctor Kim after a preliminary brain scan and Jimin watches them- waiting for another to happen.

He remembers being surprised at the tears that fell onto the back of his hands, touching his cheeks and finding them wet. Jimin rarely cries, he doesn't have enough human in his body for something as simple as tears but his hands are shaking and he's sobbing, stifling his tears by biting the back of his hand so he doesn't wake them.

Jungkook looked grey-faced in the hospital bed, in need of his rest; Jimin’s love- sick. Jimin’s lovely little omega- nearly dying. Tae had already cried himself to sleep sprawled across Jungkook's lap, his eyes puffy. Holding Jungkook around his waist softly, puffy cheek pillowed against the thin sheets. His skin turned grey with sadness, face pinched with pain.

Jungkookie can't go- they can't take him from them. He can't go he can't go-he can't. He and Tae, they have to stay here, they have to stay by Jimin's side or else- or else he wouldn't know how to function.

Jungkook had stirred, his mumbled words not making much sense but Jimin had soothed him effortlessly with a scent gland pressed below his nose. The omega had settled back under the covers, and for the rest of the night, Jimin had remained firmly between them and the door, their protector- their pack alpha.

Until that moment, Jimin hadn’t really been sure if he really loved Jungkook or if his heart just automatically gravitated to what Tae loved. But no- he’s thoroughly doomed. His brain repeating the same words over and over again- holy fuck- not two- I can't love two people. It’s too much. Jimin’s heart breaks from the love overflowing it.

But he can’t protect Jungkook the way he protected Tae, there are no bullies with fingers to break- only blood money in his pocket and expensive treatments that might keep him alive and operating at full bunny capacities for as long as he can. Jimin gets the first hospital bill and immediately doubles his yearly kill count.

And so two became three. jungkook moved in fully immediately after the seizures, since he needed someone around his basically constantly to make sure he didn’t die. Gone where the days of bringing him donuts and takeout to the gym just cuz, and here where the days where Jimin and taehyung poured over articles and tried recipe after recipe to help jungkook adjust to his new lifestyle.

Jimin found him one day, sat on the floor in their bedroom an empty bag of chips in front of him crying, scared out of his mind, but it had been so hard to resist- to accept that his life had changed. the omega had been crying- “hyung don’t hate me- please don’t hate me i know i’m so much work for you and tae- i know i’m not the same but-”

Jimin did his best to kiss away jungkook’s tears, “it’s okay kookie- im not mad, im not upset we’re just worried, here, here come sit in the nest, let’s just lie here for a little bit okay? Why don’t you call Dr. Kim he always makes you feel better baby,”

with tae done with school, killing people became a way to pay off Jungkook’s copious medical dept, and a way to search for a cure (even though there isn’t one).

Jungkook didn’t have insurance when his epilepsy started and now that it qualifies as a pre-existing condition it’s nearly impossible for him to get it. Jungkook has to get monthly brain scans, an MRI, and a CT scan each- just to make sure that he’s not getting long-term brain damage.

Jungkook and the whole pack still think they’re gifted assistance by the government for that, They don’t know that it's blood money that keeps Jungkook alive and healthy. They don’t know that Jimin has been paying it off slowly- going straight to the hospital to reduce the medical bills greatly, a private donor.

Each visit costs at least ten grand not to mention the occasional overnights that he has to go in for when his seizures are bad and last too long. In the beginning, Jimin had to do a hit once a month just to keep them from going underwater.

The same words are a mantra in his head; anything for Jungkook, anything for Tae. Jimin's shoulders ache with that responsibility- because if he thought looking after one packmate was too much, having two will be twice the responsibility.

But he doesn't have to worry for long because Dr. Kim- Namjoon will take that weight and help him bear it too.

Jimin was ready to accept the medical professional into their lives in the same way he’d originally sought out jungkook for Tae. It helps alleviate some of the anxiety when Jimin has to leave- that he's not leaving his two special people unattended. Dr. Namjoon is simply the best person for jungkook to be around- the safest person for jungkook to love.

The fact that namjoon considered jimin as also his isn't something he considers, not for a long while.

When they first merged packs with Namjoon, and it became clear that Yoongi's scent and genetics were able to keep Jungkook's seizures at bay ever so slightly jimin was happy to accept them into their ranks. Jimin is happy to bend to Jin’s will when he keeps his two favorite people happy.

Jimin's a little pissed off when his initial reaction to the omega is to roll over and show his belly, his stupid instincts having much the same reaction that they’d had to namjoon. no wonder why they where so close, why namjoon’s hand seemed permanently glued to jin’s lower back.

but jimin can’t help but let out a small happy grumble when the older omega runs his fingers through Jimin's hair and comments dryly. "Now- you're nothing more than a pup, I don't know why Joonie called you intimidating you're just a cutie."

Cutie, jimin’s never been called a cutie by someone before.

Jimin hadn't been able to stop his blush, most people find him creepy, but not Jin. not Jin who fusses with Jimin's jacket every time they leave, scolding him for not wearing a thicker one. Not Jin who sends them off with trays and trays of seizure-friendly food who takes to cooking for jungkook as easily as namjoon takes to loving him.

Jimin asks why the other omega is doing so much for them, and Jin replies so naturally, "you spend so much of your energy looking after your pack jiminie, who looks after you? who takes care of you?"

Beyond Taehyung and Jungkook, no one has ever wanted to take care of him. not even his parents loved him like that. Jimin is not someone who anyone should invite in, not some pretty stray pup (that would be Hoseokie) but a snake hiding outside the back door searching just for a little bit of warmth to hide in.

And yet- Jin is so so giving. Really, he should be more careful with whom he gives his love to. If he doesn't have enough sense to be careful with his heart than Jimin will be the sense for him.

Of course, Jimin had been nearly irate when his obsessions expanded, because if having two people to look after was too much then having five was defintly too much for one alpha to do. Jimin never expected to find other obsessions the same way it started with Tae, but it's possible apparently, for a snake to find 7 separate dens to sleep in.

Jimin finds himself kissing off Jin’s pout because he wants to, finds himself craving Namjoon’s scent because it makes him feel all gooey inside, safe in a way that Jimin didn’t know he needed to feel safe. He finds himself picking Yoongi up and kissing him silly on the countertops just to taste his chocolate scent a little closer. To get them all in him and not just outside of himself.

It’s easy to love all of them. It's easy to love Hobi when he comes along, it's easy to get just as obsessed with them as he is with Tae. Jimin recites each of their favorite things in his head much like he recites the facts of his contemporary assassins. learns them the way he'd learn targets and escape routes.

Namjoon loves plants almost as much as Hobi does, the gentle alpha sniffs the ones by the roadside when Jimin walks him home which he also really really likes, Namjoon might be a pack alpha but he loves remembering that the pack bond goes two ways. He always acts happy when Jimin takes pictures of them and sends them to his group chat when he’s away. And likes it even better when he takes an interest in their health and backs Namjoon up with his concerns.

Jin- Jin likes it when Jimin cleans up after dinner without having to ask, likes it even better when he takes the initiative and sets out the banchan on nights when he’s missing his family. It helps the sadness at their passing feel just a little farther away. Jin likes hearing his opinions on things and having a second voice in his head to decide, not because he doubts his own point of view but because he values Minnie's different perspective.

Jin might not nest as much as jungkook does- but he certainly likes nesting materials and having ample amounts readily accessible. Pastels preferably. he's more color-focused than jungkook is.

Hobi- Hobi likes to feel included and in on special secrets, likes it when Jimin takes him on special one-on-one dates. Likes it when Jimin tells him small little secrets of how they operate. “Don’t tell Jungkookie- but it really makes Tae crazy when he steals his cream cuz he uses it everywhere not just on his face. And Jin knows so he always makes sure to buy an extra container so that when jk uses all of it, Tae doesn't have to scold him.”

And Yoongi, Yoongi likes it when Jimin doesn’t ask too many questions, likes it when he just pulls the beta onto his lap for some cuddling, scenting him. Likes it when he teases him for small things and praises him too, "your knees are do pink hyung, do you ever get any sunlight? Hasn't Namjoon given you talking too about vitamin D."

"Yes but he also teases me about the other vitamin d" he likes the way that Jimin can get possessive sometimes. The way that their sex life is half a joke and half Jimin staking his claim on the beta.

"Well, we should make sure you've gotten your daily requirements huh?"

Yoongi likes the softer sex more than he likes the rough stuff, likes it when jimin rocks slowly into him or laps at his cute little beta cock, “you’re our special packmate, don’t you know that hyung? I don’t know what we’d do without you baby.”

Maybe Jimin's just greedy. Maybe he wants as much love as a regular person so he's fooled them into thinking that he's good enough for them- that he's worth their love. He’s lied and bartered and killed to be here so fooling them into thinking that the hands they touch and cradle aren't covered with blood isn't much of a stretch.

Jimin knows if they knew, they wouldn't love him, but he needs them too badly to be truthful. Couldn't risk losing them even if-

Even if every time he kills it gets a little harder, that every time he fires his gun he see’s their faces. He's always worried that somehow the death on the other side will hurt them. Jimin doesn't have anxiety- couldn't have it he's just not built that way-but when he shakes awake in jin's arms, the omega cooing at him and telling him it's going to be alright, that he just has to breathe- Well, the Shoe fits.

Jimin doesn't want to be a killer, even if he is one.

But once you’ve earned your name in the underworld it’s hard to distance yourself from it. It’s hard to stop killing once they’ve made you start. Jimin doesn’t need the money as much as he used to anymore. Doesn’t need it period by the time that their packs join for real.

He Lets his other contemporaries pick up enough work that his unwillingness is barely noticed by the main family. For all they know Jimin is just lazy and in love. He does maybe three or four murders a year- nothing more.

Snakes take a long time to digest their kills and Jimin is no different. But Jimin’s bosses aren’t the kind of people you can say no too. he cannot dodge their requests or turn down contracts indefinitely, his will must bend to theirs.

Every time he kills he gets a little closer to losing them- he doesn't know why it feels that way but he knows, everything has an expiration date. It's an unfortunate truth but-

Jimin will be a killer for them until the day he dies.

~-~

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fill-me-with-your-memes-daddy · 3 years

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Watching the Rise of the Titans movie and I'll be documenting all of my thoughts/reactions here. [Spoiler Warning]

So instead of reblogging every new update, I'm just going to have this post up on my phone as I watch and type my reactions in a bullet list format.

Nari's human disguise is so cute. As someone who does have a cottagecore aesthetic, I want to cosplay her so bad

Are Skrael and/or Belroc non-binary coded? Regardless, I'm also obsessed and I want to fuck Skrael and be Belroc.

STEVE CARING ABOUT JIM BEING HURT YESSSS!!! My god his redemption has probably been one of the greatest there is because he doesn't just suddenly go from being a bully to a completely good person. You can see the gradual shift in learning better throughout the shows which is awesome.

IN NEW YOOOOOOORRRRRRRK!!!!!! CONCRETE JUNGLE WHERE DREAMS ARE MADE OFFFFFFFFFFFFF!!!!!

The mugshot montage reminded me of season 1 of trollhunters when toby and Jim were arrested at the museum.

STRICKLER PUT A RING ON IT??? HE'S THE ONLY DILF IVE EVER ACTUALLY AGREED WAS HOT WYM I CAN'T HAVE HIM??? well I'm still really happy about his arc over the series probably one of my favorite character growths.

Eli my guy got his growth spurt!!! As an 18 year old who is still 5'0", I'm happy but envious for him

So I went into this movie without watching any trailers or promo, but I doubt anything could have prepared me for the existence of mpreg. In fact, I wasn't going to document my reactions until I saw that.

NAMURA!!!!!!!!! MY BELOVED!!!!!! I CAN STILL THIRST FOR YOU WITHOUT GUILT

The coach teacher just called the kids zoomers so I have to dock one point from my final rating just because of that. Unforgivable

Those husky animation models suck lmao

Oh fuck the titans got power ranger zords!!

God why did they include the mpreg??? This movie would have been perfect without it.... After that plot point being revisited only one time I'm already beyond done with it

Like it's bringing me back to the v*ltron days where they're was a suspiciously high amount of klance omegaverse and mpreg fics and art created and it physically hurts because Steve and Keith's voice actor is the same person meaning this is especially cursed to me since I was unfortunately in the v*ltron fandom and remember all of that

But like on another note, how old are these characters again??? I haven't checked any wikis because of spoilers but is Steve an adult??? I know aja might be technically a lot older than 18 because alien but is whatever age she is equivalent to an adult as far as emotionally and physically in Akaridion development??? IS THIS A TEEN (M)PREGNANCY IN A KIDS SHOW????

Like bruh I saw a singular post on here before going into the movie that was like "rott spoilers without context" and there was a pregnant belly but I was absolutely not expecting the actual context of it. I'll find the post after I finish and edit this post to tag the creator right here: @makoden

This entire post is just gonna be me ranting about mpreg huh

Anyway I love the whole roundtable allusion to the legends of king arthur (not the toa version but the one he's based off)

THERE'S 3 TO 5 BABIES????? I need to take a break bruh this is just too much

Alright I've taken a 30 minute break got some food and did some things i love (decompressed by tactile stimming with some owl plushies and watched some videos on my favorite owl, Garu. He lives in Japan with his owner and is a domesticated eagle owl who basically just acts like a sky cat. If anyone else needs some eye bleach, here is their YouTube channel)

Blinky and ARRRGHHH!!! saying their "if one of us doesn't make it" talk my god one of them is going to die I can see it and I will be utterly crushed. Jim can't lose another father figure and Toby can't lose his wingman again I will riot if this happens

On a similar but unrelated to the movie note, can we just talk about how toa started with Jim having 0 dads and (if strickler and blinky live to the end) will end with 2 dads? Like I just really feel happy for him that he has two dads who actually figured out how to put the past behind them to not have any infighting between them so that both of them are healthy father figures. Jim has already been through literal hell and back losing his actual humanity in the process so if he loses one of them, I'm going to be really pissed because at this point, this is just Jim torture porn. Y'all know how as SpongeBob SquarePants went on, the show just became Squidward torture porn? It's starting to feel that way for toa and I really hope they cut the shit by the ending

Jlaire is such a good ship but like I feel like it's too perfect they never disagree with each other

YESSSSSSS Someone finally doesn't treat toby like a fat waste of space who messes stuff up!!! I think out of all the characters that would have been most deserving of a rewrite, it's Toby. Sometimes I just feel he's only comic relief and any heartfelt moments he's had in the series was also born of stupidity (ie his flour baby project being unharmed was seen by him as divine intervention from his parents but was actually just Eli and Steve behind the scenes).

Ohhhhh yesssssss Archie's father!!! I was hoping I'd see him again because we got so little of him last

Ooooooooooh Asian trollmarket!!!!!

Oh never mind slavery trollmarket

Bruh titanic camelot

I feel like we're not seeing enough of the villains because I completely forgot about the power ranger zord things

NAMORA NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO MY LAST CRUSHHHH

STRICKLER NO NOT YOU TOO PLEASE

WHAT THE FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

THE ONLY TWO CHARACTERS I SIMP FOR ON THIS SHOW DIED WITHIN FIVE MINUTES OF EACH OTHER

THAT WHOLE ASS RANT I WROTE IS COMING TRUE FUCK THIS MOVIE THIS SERIES IS JUST JIM TORTURE PORN

WAIT JIM'S SPERM DONOR INFO?

Oh thank God I don't want to know anything about that person

For the record, I call that man Jim's sperm donor because he has no business being called a father to him. All he did was donate some swimmers to the creation of him and give him abandonment issues

Oh another blind troll elder???? This fucker is just if vendel was a bad guy

Bruh I was grieving

PACIFIC RIM WITH GUN ROBOT VEX AND THE BELROCZORD? I've never seen that movie but I know the reference

Bruh Blinky doesn't read horoscopes? Does he realize conspiracy theories are just the manly version of horoscopes?

NO DON'T KILL VEX STOP KO-ING FOUND FAMILY MEMBERS

Oh thank God he's okay

NO NOT ARCHIE AND CHARLEMAGNE OH MY GOD

oh never mind they're just gonna coup de tat I believe in them :))

But I want to see him again

But I'm glad to see vex

Yay they're in arcadia!

But yeah I wondered why the trolls and Merlin didn't keep the whole "daylight doesn't hurt trolls" feature from the eternal night but now Guillermo del Toro I see you were playing the long con in that just to kill my girl Namora :(((

Oooooh I love the animation of the Narizord over Chihuahua!! It looks very good and realistic (if only they could have put some of that into those huskies from before smh)

Bruh the character designs of the arcane order are so good I want to be them

Nari making sure the Skraelzord doesn't crush the bus

DAMN DOUBLE HOMICIDE

Bruh I'm just glad we finally have an answer on why arcadia had everything going on as opposed to literally anywhere else!! I always found that as a weird coincidence for plot convince.

BRUH WERE BACK TO THE MPREG IM SO JEALOUS I FORGOT ABOUT THAT EVEN THOUGH IT WAS BECAUSE I WAS GRIEVING THE LOSS OF MY LOVELIES.

Oh that's real convenient that the ninth configuration meant all of them. Way to not decide which character gets more attention. Though it probably was a smart way to not have any infighting in the fandom between each character's stan group.

Bruh I just realized where is Barbera did they just ditch her on the Camelot ship???

And where are the other trolls that migrated at the end of trollhunters s3? They said something about new jersey but obviously Jim and the other main characters got on Camelot instead.... This feels like a plot hole

And we never learned the process of how changelings are made and bonded to humans and stuff. We just know it's super painful but I'm curious ffs!!!!

THE DONT THINK BECOME HERO SPEECH ALL SAID TOGETHER!!!

BRUH THEY REALLY HAD TO SHOW HIM GIVING BIRTH??????? WAS THAT AN ABSOLUTE MUST??????

Plus the main audience for this series is little children (the rating for the movie is literally TV-Y7) so even though my adult ass is not in the target audience, I STILL DONT UNDERSTAND WHY WOULD MPREG AND ANAL BIRTH WOULD BE AN IMPORTANT THING TO 7 YEAR OLDS???? THIS IS A LITERAL FETISH HIDDEN IN KIDS CONTENT ITS ELSAGATE ALL OVER AGAIN Y'ALL 😭😭😭😭😭

Though it's probably hypocritical of me to think fetishes don't belong in kids tv when I've openly admitted to thirsting for strickler and namora

HUZZAH

NEW AMULET WAZ GOOD????

STAB THAT BITCH JIM

WAIT NO I SAID STAB NOT GET STABBED

Alright good job just missed the directions at first but you fixed it

SEVEN KIDS?????????

T O B Y ????????????

W A I T NO

N O

IS HE ACTUALLY

OH MY GOD THERE'S HOPE

NO THERE ISN'T

F U C K THIS SHIT THEY REALLY JUST HAD HIM TO BE BULLIED THEN KILLED

Y'ALL IM ACTUALLY CRYING THIS NEVER HAPPENS

I NEVER ACTUALLY GET SO EMOTIONAL OVER MEDIA THAT I CRY IT ONLY HAPPENED ONCE AT THE END OF VOLTRON BUT AHHHHHHHH

W A I T

HE'S GONNA BE BROUGHT BACK?????

HOLD UP THEY'RE JUST GONNA BRING ALL THOSE DEAD PEOPLE BACK??????

WAIT IS HE

BLINKY CALLED HIM A SON

HOLD ON IS THIS GOING TO BE A CLIFFHANGER???????????

BRUH THEY REALLY JUST CAN'T END THE SERIES WITHOUT CLIFFHANGERS like there's always an open ending

TROLLHUNTER TOBY????? You know what forget the whole rants I had on how toby was written they just redeemed it all

And that's all! I'd rate it a 6.5/10 because it's definitely the weakest of all the sequels but still had amazing animation and some good plot points. It's just really hard to look over the bad stuff enough to rate it any higher.

#tales of arcadia #rise of the titans #trollhunters #rott #rise of the titans spoilers #rott spoilers #toa #3 below #athena's own original post!#jim lake jr #claire nuñez #toby domzalski

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isabellehemlock · 2 years

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End Of The Year Creative Wrap-Up

Thank you to the lovely @nade2308 for tagging me for this fantastic wrap up 💕

I'll go ahead and tag some authors I've enjoyed this year - both in the joy of reading their content, as well as getting to know better as people: @tobebbanburg @boutiquetraveltravelboutique @82tweeder @ao3-arkada @bewires @beepbeepsan @mekana47 @katt5673

Though of course no pressure to do!

And because this got long, I'll put it under the cut

What is your favorite thing you created? Which work are you proudest of?

I did a super fun end of the year fic ask round and covered these in a few posts I compiled here 😎

Is there anything you are proud of that you achieved this year?

Gosh that word 'pride' makes me cringe . . . Let's call it, uh, something that made me smile?? So how about the amount of words I wrote this year:

Though that doesn't include one fic and a chapter update I'm working on right now. So this might go up an additional 10 to 20k before the end of the year 🙈

Did you explore anything new this year? (A new way to be creative, a trope you didn’t write before, or an idea you hadn’t thought of earlier, etc.)

I dived into digital art! Fanart, and manips ~ and for writing: crossovers and even omegaverse. Definitely did not expect to do any of those things! Was a wonderful way to stretch myself creatively 💕

Which work gave you the most difficulty? What was your biggest creative challenge this year?

Honestly I'm not sure if anything comes to mind when I think 'difficult.' Like some chapters have brought me to tears, but the necessary, processing kind? So yeah, I got nothing for that first question haha -

For the second one, I'd probably say the digital art! I've never even used a stylus before, so it was a smidge of a learning curve but it's a very relaxing thing for me - I can have the Liturgy of Hours playing in the background, and color and it helps my fidgeting :) Though for the NSFW art I listen to random playlist shuffles lol

When it comes to writing, the biggest creative challenge was diving into a precanon fic that would include the First Crusade. I wrote about my hesitation in the introduction chapter, but the idea just wouldn't leave me alone - so I had to work the hardest past any posting anxiety when it came to that one.

Which work brought you the most joy?

Honestly, and I know this sounds like the easy answer, but all of them? In various ways, on various levels, but I don't post anything that didn't mean something to me in one way or the other - even the pwf, because of the feelings lol - so I'm not sure I could really pick one?

Which of your works do you think people should check out?

I think it depends on what they’re looking for? I've enjoyed writing across multiple genres, sometimes it's just self indulgent stuff, sometimes it's something I would have loved to have read when I was younger - sort of like making a gift to your inner child ❤ So, are we looking for escapism, or processing something? Something to dig into for a while, or a quick one shot?

If you're ever curious and would like to see my fics sorted by canon, alternative universe, crossovers, etc, you can check out this post here for an overview (including rating, length, status, and summaries)

And happy to talk to anyone who would like to know a bit more before diving into something - I 100% have reached out to authors for this, and even have had a friend who checked a tag for me, etc. I seriously am more than happy to chat anytime about a tag, or content, because I know how subjective those can be.

Do you have creative plans for next year? Is there anything exciting you’re currently working on?

I am so hyped to be working on my precanon fic right now, like seriously, I've made memes of it lol. I also am diving deep for the most angstiest thing I've ever written - though I would like the majority of it written before I post it.

And both of those will go into next year - where I have no less then seven more projects I'm looking forward to (and potentially two more I'm adding to the list, a Stripper AU and an Outlander AU that I've made farrrr too many manips and moodboards for already).

Lastly, any words of wisdom or anything else you would like to share?

My words of wisdom from personal experience as a content creator in a fandom is . . . curate your online experience early on. At the end of the day, people are still people - both good, bad and everything in between, and fandom is both a source of creativity and escapism from a flipping pandemic going on around us. We are living in a historical event and though balance is key, it’s alright if you need to curate and set digital boundaries in your shared spaces online.

Give the benefit of the doubt first - so much is lost in communication without body language and hearing verbal tone - and remember the person behind the screen, but also believe people when they show you who they are. Consistent actions will reveal long term intentions over time, and lean on that as you filter things to protect your own mental health.

Be a good person, but don’t waste your time trying to prove it - and though not everyone deserves your kindness (much less vulnerability), civility is always a good option. I 100% know how hard it is to sit in the discomfort of having set a boundary to protect yourself, and I promise it’s still a hundred times better than the alternatives of giving access to things and people that wound your psyche.

Make the content you want to see in a fandom - because though it’s a joy to create, and share - and it’s natural to wonder if anyone is also enjoying it, I can assure you there are! You never know the impact of happiness we might be giving someone, or something we made brought a smile to someone’s face, helped them feel seen, processed something. The great thing about having so many free online platforms for fandom, is that there’s room for everyone! Someone out there will enjoy it!

#tag game #end of the year wrap up tag game

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genuine-firefly · 3 years

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Sk8 the Infinity Fic Recs

I had an itch to make a fic rec list. I’ve never made one before and atm I’m super into Sk8 the Infinity. It’s not in any particular order or anything. There’s a lot of omegaverse on here, so take notice if that’s not your jam. Also mind the major warnings. Here we go!

“Wind” by a_bit_batty (WIP)

Rated: E

Words: 22,900

Major Warnings: Graphic Depictions of Violence, Rape/Non-con

Summary: Langa's upstairs neighbours are LOUD, and he has work early in the morning, so he pays them a visit intending to give them a piece of his mind. But the man who answers the door looks almost... Scared?

https://archiveofourown.org/works/30425268/chapters/75014250

“Not All Surprises Hurt” by Anxious_Valentine (WIP)

Rated: M

Words: 57,240

Summary: Kaoru wasn't always so cautious or a planner, but certain events throughout his life knocked the spontaneity right out of him and made him fearful of the unknown. He assumes that's why he's maintained his long-standing friendship with Kojiro, even if he was an obnoxious, thirsty gorilla most of the time. But recently, something's shifted between them, something Kaoru's never experienced before, and he's at a loss for how to respond to the changing circumstances.

Kaoru's about to learn though that not all surprises hurt, and even some can be a catalyst for a life he never thought would be possible for a person like him.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/31679624/chapters/78403592

“Fragile Things” by dia_dove (WIP)

Rated: E

Words: 27,570

Major Warnings: Graphic Depictions of Violence, Rape/Non-con

Summary: In one night, everything in Reki's life falls apart.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/30220290/chapters/74466492

“Fading Scars” Series by DrearyBanana (Complete)

Rated: M, E

Words: 129,999

Major Warnings: Creator Chose Not to Use Archive Warnings

Summary: Reki is trying to get his life back together after crossing Adam and spending three years suffering for it. With the support of his family, he's getting back on his feet and rediscover his passions. The mysterious skater with light blue hair who skates in the park near Reki's house starts to reawaken his interest in skateboarding.

Langa has stumbled his way into being a pro skater after moving to Okinawa, but his heart has never been in it. Everything feels like something to pass the time, and all he wants is to feel that joy he used to get from snowboarding. Slowly, the mysterious redhead who watches him skate starts to make Langa feel like he might be able to get back to that heart-pounding feeling after all.

https://archiveofourown.org/series/2307053

“You Make It Better” by i6uooh_uiw (complete)

Rated: E

Words: 7,112

Summary: after kaoru's race with adam, he and kojiro have some things to talk about. at least, kojiro would really like to talk.

(or: kaoru doesn't like facing his feelings, kojiro and kaoru can't stop bickering, and kojiro's dick is really very large)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/30028944

“The Makings of a Home” by Insertsomethingwittyhere (WIP)

Rated: E

Words: 10,112

Major Warnings: Creator Chose Not to Use Archive Warnings

Summary: A drunken night and missed medication leave Kaoru between a rock and a hard place. He had always been careful to keep his dynamic known but out of the way. What better way to prove that being an omega wouldn't affect his performance then to rub his success into the face of an ex thus proving him wrong about his dynamic? Unfortunately, it only takes one too many drinks at Sia la Luce for his world to take a turn into the wacky and stressful -and that's with Adam still at large- as he steps into the uncertainties of parenthood, not with the rag tag pack he'd become part of, but with a child of his own. A baby born of him and Kojiro who he'd always had a crush on, but knew who could never love him back.

Of course now with a baby on the way he only has so much time to decide what to do. So the worries start to pile on.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/30696920/chapters/75748676

“The One with the School Festival Trope” by LaurelNymph (Complete)

Rated: T

Words: 26,534

Summary: The good ol’ School Festival is here, and Reki gets to use his handyman skills to help his class pull off their event. They’re impressed.

Especially the girls.

Langa is Not Happy about that.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/31745821/chapters/78577891

“All Was Golden (When the day Met the Night)” by MissLightBright (Complete)

Rated: T

Words: 113,642

Major Warnings: Graphic Depictions of Violence

Summary: Reki was just a beta. He was boring and unappealing. He had no chance with Langa and he knew it.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/29303079/chapters/71960559

“Local Skate Dads Adopt Three Sons and a Hooligan” by miyaji_08 (WIP)

Rated: M

Words: 79,779

Major Warnings: Creator Chose Not to Use Archive Warnings

Summary: Cherry and Joe are NOT parents, thank you very much, and they would appreciate it if you could remember that the next time one of their idiots get in trouble.

Or: They don't mean to adopt all these kids, except for the part where they very much do.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/30478317/chapters/75158904

“Summer Twilight Ricochet” by mousapelli (Complete)

Rated: E

Words: 10,439

Summary: Being almost but not-quite boyfriends with Langa is fun, but Reki's ready to move it along, if he can just figure out how much of it Langa's ready for. (Alpha Langa, Omega Reki)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/30378327

“Sunrise Eyes an Sunset Hair” (Baby, We’re a Pretty Pair) by Orphan_account (Complete)

Rated: E

Words: 9,600

Summary: "Kaoru," Joe moans and even though it sounds so breathless, he doesn't grant himself the pleasure of fresh air in favor of kissing Cherry again and again and yet again. "Kaoru, Kaoru – what are you doing to me?"

If he could, if only his brain worked in synch with his lips and vocal cords, Cherry would probably ask the same question, turn it on him and demand an answer so desperately because he knows he won't last much longer with this uncertainty in his life. It's already a lasting decay in his mind, he doesn't need it rotting away at his body too.

Cherry is certain Joe will just make him another number in his hook-up statistics if he gives in to his feelings.

Joe is certain he's in love with Cherry.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/32388481

“Nothing has to Change (but What if I Want it to?) by p_istachio (WIP)

Rated: NR

Words: 17,068

Summary: Langa is the mildest alpha in every sense of the word, and Reki is the most unreserved omega you’ll ever meet. With secondary genders being the last things on their minds, it’s no surprise that both of them are convinced that the other is a beta. How will their dynamic change when they inevitably find out the truth?

(Aka an unconventional ABO au bc renga heals my soul)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/30692324/chapters/75735359

“Summer Fox and Winter Wolf” by RoseLoveBunny (WIP)

Rated: M

Words: 10,404

Major Warnings: Creator Chose Not to Use Archive Warnings

Summary: Langa an artic wolf alpha just moved with his mom back to her home country of Japan from Canada after his alpha father died last year. After his death Langa refused to pick up a snowboard something that they both enjoyed so when an fox omega came running after him to take back his skateboard maybe he can try something new with someone else.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/29947413/chapters/73716159

“Kiss the Rain” by SKayLanpher (WIP)

Rated: E

Words: 122,373

Summary: When Langa takes a trip to visit family in Canada, both he and Reki find themselves despairing at the distance. Though neither is apt to admit their true feelings for the other, they miss each other desperately and so start exchanging texts whenever they can. Texts that turn rather scandalous when Reki accidentally sends a nude that he knew he never should have taken in the first place.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/31294271/chapters/77367743

#sk8 the infinity #fic recs #fanfic recs #personal #renga #matchablossom

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nessinborderland · 3 years

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Be Mine (03)

Pairing: Niragi x Reader / Chishiya x Reader

Genre: Smut, Angst, Fluff, Omegaverse

Word Count: 4.8k

Summary: You were able to stay unbounded throughout your life. You didn't want an Alpha; you didn't need one. You would rather die than to give yourself to some random male. But the man that saved your life thinks differently.

Warnings: Alpha/Omega, Dubious Consent, Vaginal Sex, Vaginal Fingering, Finger fucking, Rough Sex, Rough Kissing, Unprotected Sex, Creampie, Breeding, Pregnancy Kink, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Drama, Developing Relationship, Past Abuse, Scars

Notes: Would like to thank everyone that has been liking, reblogging and commenting on this fic, I see ya’ll and I love you. It means the world to me <3 I’m so glad people are liking my lil Niragi work. My dm’s and ask box are open if you ever feel like saying hi and/or scream over stuff in general with me lol. Enjoy!

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You had woken up to an empty bed the next morning. You had laid there, staring at the ceiling and rewinding every moment of the last twenty-four hours in your head, over and over. How things had changed so fast. How so much had happened already. You didn't know if you should feel sad or relieved by Niragi's absence; you weren't sure if you wanted to face him after what had happened last night. You still remembered the look in his eyes, his promise, how he made you feel. It was all so...overwhelming.

A week has passed without you speaking with Niragi. You barely caught a glimpse of him beside the occasional moments where you see him from afar with his group of militants, usually coming from or going on raids. You tried to talk to him on several occasions, but he was out of sight before you could get close enough. You also changed rooms after that first night, and part of you was hoping to see him barge in to take you back to his room. But it never happened.

He is avoiding you.

That or maybe he is usually that busy. Either way, you don’t like how this whole situation makes you feel. Yeah sure, maybe you aren’t exactly being the most approachable person either, but you are...scared. This is all so new for you. His scent has practically disappeared from your skin, and you can feel yourself getting restless again. Especially when he is close.

You don’t see him, but you can feel his eyes on you. You can smell the peppermint in the air every time he is close. You usually walk around the hotel alone or just stay in your bedroom. Walking around by yourself is nerve-wracking; the constant whispers, the stares, the way people either avoid you or get way too close to you. But you can feel him always close by, watching you.

Chishiya.

You honestly don’t know if you should feel safe or afraid. Afraid that he will use his influence as an Alpha to take you as Niragi did the first time you met. At least Chishiya hasn’t tried hunting you down yet. Even though stalking you around like a cat chasing a mouse isn’t much different.

You’re now in a car with Ann, exhausted, wet from head to toe, but alive. Another game where your skills were evaluated; another game where you won without particularly impressing her. You always feel like you’re alive out of sheer luck and the help of others. It bothers you more than you dare to say. You have already been evaluated in games of Clubs and Diamonds, and you’re sure you would be dead if it wasn’t for Ann and the other players.

You can’t understand how people can be so smart at these hell games. Yes, you were successful at solving the riddle that allowed you to win the game of Diamonds, but since when was that impressive? You would still have been eaten by that shark in the game of Clubs without everyone else’s help.

“How are you holding up, Kenji?” you ask the young man sitting beside you. His arm is bandaged with a t-shirt already drenched in blood and his face is pale. He turns to you with a half-smile.

“Alive, thanks to you,” he says, moaning in pain when the car rides over a bump. “Thank you for that, by the way. For coming back for me.”

“It was the right thing to do.” you shrug with a smile, “Besides, I almost got eaten too.”

You can feel Ann’s eyes on you through the rearview mirror. You wonder what she’s thinking. It’s like you’re back in high school, waiting for an important evaluation. You hate it.

The car finally parks in the Beach’s parking lot and you get out, helping Kenji to his feet before two men come to take him to the infirmary. You’re walking away to get inside when Ann calls your name.

“A lot of people wouldn’t have done what you did,” she says. “That was brave of you. And stupid.”

“Uhh, thanks?” you stand there awkwardly as she seems to assess you through those big sunglasses of hers. “I just-”

“What do you see in him?” she asks after a pause, interrupting you. “You have nothing in common.”

You don’t know what to answer; shared interests and personality traits are not exactly what attracted you to each other. You shrug, “Wolf things I guess.” It’s not exactly something easy to explain. You also would rather not give it too much thought.

Ann hums, shaking her head. “Just be careful,” and walks away before you can even think of an answer.

You’re about to make your way inside when the sound of tires screeching makes you look back. The militants arrived from the games. You instantly see Niragi as he gets out of a vehicle, and you desperately want to approach him. He makes his way to the entrance at a fast pace, rifle on his shoulder as he’s followed by the rest of the militants. His pace falters when his gaze falls on you, but he doesn’t stop as he passes by you without a word.

“Niragi!” you’re calling before you can think twice.

He stops in his tracks, making everyone behind him stop too. More than twenty pairs of eyes lock on you as you stand there, heat growing on your cheeks. Why the hell did I call him, you think to yourself before clearing your throat.

“Hmm, could I speak to you? In private?”

He sighs. “I can’t right now. I’m going back out,” he says in a dismissive tone. You can’t help but notice the dark circles under his eyes; you worry if he’s been getting enough sleep lately. “We’ll talk when I get back.” and with that, he turns his back on you and walks away, followed by his group.

He’s definitely avoiding you. You wonder why; was it all the rejecting? Maybe he finally realized you are more trouble than pleasure. Maybe he regrets his promise to you, made in an inebriated state?

It was your disgusting scars, a mean voice in your head whispers.

You flinch. Whatever it is, you hope that he will at least be straightforward and honest with you. Eventually.

You try not to overthink it as you get to your room and go straight to the bathroom, getting rid of your wet clothes before jumping in the warm shower. The thing you probably like the most about the Beach is the showers. That and the good food; there’s always a tray of delicious meals delivered to your room three times a day. You can definitely get used to those small luxuries.

You finish your shower just in time to receive your dinner tray. You eat your meal in bed, a book you found while outside laying open on your knees as you take occasional spoonfuls of your rabbit stew. The sound of laughter and loud talking makes you frown for the third time in half an hour. One of the things you dislike the most about the Beach; the constant partying.

You give up on the book and decide to sleep, hoping that your exhaustiveness will win against the noise of your next-door neighbors.

It does not.

You’re knocking on their door moments later. A man opens the door, clearly beyond drunk, if his breath and slurred speech are anything to go by.

“Could you guys please keep it down?” you ask. "I'm trying to sleep." The man stares you up and down with a smirk, and you give a small step back.

“Yo, guys guess who came to pay us a visit!” he says behind him. You can see three men sitting at a table, playing what you guess is poker, several beer bottles scattered around them. You think you recognize one of them as part of the militants. Maybe coming here wasn’t a good idea after all.

“Isn’t that Niragi’s bitch?” “Ask her if she wants to join us!” is what you hear them say above the laughter. Yes, bad idea. You put your arms around you, wishing you were wearing something more besides your cotton shorts and Niragi’s shirt.

“Listen, just keep the noise to a minimum, that’s all I’m asking.” you quickly say before turning around to walk back to your room. A hand grabs your arm before you can take more than a couple of steps.

“Why don’t you join us?” says the man. His friends stand behind him, a look in their eyes that makes you shiver with apprehension. “We could show you a good time.”

“Thanks but no, thanks, I’m just trying to get some sleep.”

“You can sleep here, we don’t mind.” he retorts with a pull to your arm. “C’mon-”

“Haru, this isn’t a good idea,” warns the guy you had recognized. “She’s with Niragi.”

Haru laughs and pulls you closer, ignoring your struggle. He sniffs your hair. “Then he has been doing a shitty job at fucking her.” he pulls at your shirt, “Isn’t this his? She doesn’t smell like an Alpha at all,” he chuckles, “And didn’t you say that he ignored her today? I don’t think he’ll care if we get his sloppy seconds.”

“Let me go!” you pull your arm from his grip and face the taller man. “Niragi is not here to kick your asses, but I am.”

“Oh look at this, the little Omega has claws!”

“So do I.”

You freeze. So do Haru and his friends.

You smell him before you see him. Peppermint and rain.

You turn around to see him a few meters behind you, standing casually with his hands in his pockets. He looks bored; like he’s just passing by and there’s an inconvenience on his path. But his eyes…

“Chishiya-”

“You aren’t very smart, are you?” he interrupts, walking slowly towards you. “Harassing an Omega when there’s an Alpha around. It’s not acceptable back in the real world, what makes you think it’s acceptable here?” his eyes flash with something you recognize. You also notice the golden ring on them, giving them a more animal look. “Now you can either let her go or-.”

Haru releases his grip on your arm and takes a step back before Chishiya can finish his sentence.

“We didn’t do anything to her, man,” he says, hands raised. The man trembles slightly, eyes cast on the ground. “We were just messing around, that’s all.”

Chishiya chuckles and nods, “Of course, of course. Just remember what can happen if you mess with her again.” one of his hands leaves his pocket to scratch his neck, almost mindlessly. You gasp when you see the claws, the changed hand. “I would hate to get blood on my white hoodie.”

The men scatter back into their room without another word, tails between their legs. You stand there looking at him, involved in his scent. After more than a week without an Alpha, having him so close is not doing you any favors. His presence is unmistakably wolf, his scent stronger by his show of dominance. He barely had to try; Betas just instinctively know not to mess with Alphas. You start feeling hot, and you curse yourself; please not now.

“Are you okay?” his voice gets your attention.

“Uh-hm, yeah I am,” you stutter a little, “Th-thanks for the help.”

He takes a few steps closer to you, his eyes never leaving yours. You feel hypnotized; like you’re under a spell. He smells so good, and you’re so horny, and he’s the only thing making you feel safe now. You think of Niragi for a moment, until your wolf pushes the memory aside with a huff; Niragi is not there, you’re still unclaimed, and there’s an Alpha right in front of you.

You jump into his arms before you’re able to overthink things even more. His arms envelop you as your lips touch, and you feel that amazing electrifying sensation every time you touch an Alpha. His lips are soft on yours as he kisses you. His hands are surprisingly warm against your skin.

“Alpha- ” you moan into the kiss.

“Bedroom,” is all he says as he pulls you with him to your room. His lips are still on yours as he closes the door with a kick before making you lay down on the bed. His body covers yours in an instant, his hands roaming your body while his lips suck the skin of your neck. Even his kisses make you feel pleasure, and you whine as his hands go under your shirt to fondle your breasts. “Your skin is so soft,” he whispers with a pinch to your nipple. “I have been wanting to touch you since I first laid my eyes on you.”

“I- I want more,” your pussy clenches around nothing as you feel him hard against your stomach, “Please, Alpha...more,” you don’t care about how you sound. You just want that sweet release only an Alpha can provide. Niragi’s face shows up in your mind’s eye, but you ignore it; he wasn’t there for you when you needed it. Chishiya was.

His hands move to untie your shorts, sliding them down your legs to uncover your wet cunt. He sits back on his heels, hand on your thigh as he stares right at your naked core. He’s more expressive now than you’ve ever seen him before; his eyes burn with lust, his bottom lip between his teeth. You whine as he stays still, pushing your hips up; you want him to fuck you, not to stare at you.

He chuckles and licks his lips. “Open your legs wider for me,” you immediately do as he says, craving his touch. His hand slides lower until his fingers are tracing your slit in up and down movements, making you moan and instinctively close your legs. “Open,” he says with a glance at your face before leaning over your center. His breath is warm against your swollen clit.

You shiver as he flicks his tongue over your sensitive bud; it feels so good, and you want more. Your hands grip your pillow as you moan in time with his licks, almost letting out a scream when he sucks on your clit. No man had ever touched you like that; they were all inside you and over after a few minutes of thrusting. Even Niragi had gone straight to business. But fuck, does it feel good.

“Chi- Chishiya, oh my god- “ you manage to say before you’re interrupted by two of his fingers entering you. They curl inside you as his tongue keeps working wonders on your clit. You can feel an orgasm growing, toes curling at the pulling sensation in your core. You’re so close. “Please keep going, don’t stop.” you practically beg as he finger fucks you.

He stops.

You open your eyes with a displeased grunt to catch him looking at you, lips glistening with your juices. He smirks, “We’re just getting started,” he says, pulling you by the legs so your center is pressing against his crotch. You moan again at feeling him hard against you with only his swim shorts in the way.

You sit up to undress him off his hoodie, something he lets you do as he devours your lips. He suddenly pulls you up against him until you’re practically sitting on his lap. You grind against him, trying to put out the fire inside you. His mouth kisses down your neck to your breasts, without fully undressing you. You try to take off the shirt, but he makes you pause.

“That’s his shirt, isn’t it?” you nod and he huffs out a laugh, unbuttoning the first buttons only, “Keep it on,” he says before closing his lips around a nipple. You close your eyes and just enjoy the sensations he provides you. Your mind goes back to Niragi; how his tongue piercing felt against you as he sucked on you too, or how his hands never stopped pleasuring you. You almost grunt in frustration at the memories; he doesn’t matter now.

“Alpha, I want you inside me,” you beg as you keep grinding on him. It’s starting to feel like torture. Your hands slide down to work on his shorts, “Please...please.”

“Easy there,” he chuckles, pushing you back down on the bed. “We have time. Be a good girl and stay still,” he says as he gets rid of his shorts in a swift movement, now completely naked in front of you. You glance at his cock, hard as wood in between his pale thighs, a bead of precum sliding from the tip. Your mouth waters; you desperately want him to fuck you, you think as your pussy clenches around nothing.

You open your mouth to say something but hesitate, trying to follow his command. You wonder how can an Alpha have so much self-control; he should be deep inside you by now. It’s beyond frustrating. He finally covers your body with his, and you smile at the sensation of his skin on yours; it feels so good. You wrap your legs around his waist, pulling him closer as you kiss him with ferocity. It hurts how much you need him.

You finally feel his tip at your entrance, and then he’s inside you with a sharp thrust of his hips against yours. You scream at the sensation; so warm, so full, so unbelievably pleasurable. His thrusts are slow but firm, each hit of his pelvis against your clit making you see stars. His face goes to the side of your neck, and you feel as his teeth graze the skin, sucking and biting; right over the fading marks Niragi left on you a week ago.

“Go faster,” you whine as you push your hips up against his. You want him to fill you up to the brim; like Niragi had done. “Please Alpha, fill me up. Make me yours.”

He doesn’t say anything, but his pace gets faster, and you finally hear him make a sound since he started fucking you. His face is still hidden in the curve of your neck, but his hands clasp around your thighs, pulling them up until you’re practically folded in half. You finally feel him deeper, hitting your g-spot as his shoves get gradually harder.

“Tell me how much you want me to knot in you,” he grunts against your ear. “Tell me you want me.”

“I- I want you,” you whine. “I want you to knot in me, and fill me up with your cum. I want you.”

He kisses your jaw, thrusts getting even faster. You can barely think; all you want is to come and for Chishiya to do the same inside you. You want to feel him as he shudders, hear him as he moans and you milk him dry. His hand goes to cradle your cheek, and you finally see his face as he locks eyes with you; his white hair sticks to his neck and forehead due to sweat, and his eyes are more gold than the usual dark brown. However, an uncomfortable realization sparks in you; there’s only lust in his eyes. No care, no adoration, no imitation of something resembling love. Nothing like Niragi’s eyes had looked at you. Your wolf pushes those thoughts aside once again, and you close your eyes as you focus on the man currently thrusting in and out of you. He’s what matters now.

Your orgasm hits you like a wave, toes curling behind his back as you clench around him in pleasure. You feel him as he comes too, hands squeezing your thighs with enough force to leave a bruise. However, you gasp when you feel him pull out with a hiss, and he finishes spilling on your belly and breasts.

You lay there as he finishes with a grunt before laying down beside you, both of you panting furiously. The fog in your brain soon evaporates, and you have to control the impulse to run out of your own bedroom. Why do you keep doing this to yourself? First Niragi, now Chishiya. All those years of self-control wasted. They meant nothing. You were just pushing back the inevitable; the day you would be claimed with no real ability to even choose by who. Your wolf doesn’t care, but you do. The last thing you want is a relationship like the one your parents had.

But you still ended up fucking two different Alphas in a week; it’s not like you have a choice.

Chishiya moving beside you pulls you out of your thoughts. He’s looking at you with his usual expression; cold and with a pull at his lips that gives the impression there’s something that only he’s smart enough to understand. It annoys you just a little. You guess it shows on your face because he’s full-on smirking as he sits up.

“Feeling regretful, are we?” he says as he retrieves his shorts, putting them on, “I figured you would.”

“Then why didn’t you stop me?” you say in a low tone, sitting up with a moan. His come sticks to your thighs and runs down the skin of your breasts and belly. You sigh when you notice it stained Niragi’s shirt too.

“Why would I?” he shrugs, putting his hoodie on, “I can’t control this thing much more than you do. Besides- ” he says, shooting a glance at your torso, “Thought it might be fun.”

You furrow your brows at him. “This isn’t about me, is it?” you ask. Things kind of start to make sense now; his constant presence near you, the shirt he wanted you to keep, “This is about Niragi.”

His eyes lit up with something like amusement. “If I get to claim an Omega while pissing off Niragi then I’m doing something right.” he starts walking towards the door, “Don’t misunderstand though; I will fight to claim you when the time comes.” He closes the door behind him.

What have you done? You feel a sudden urge to cry, but push it back; you are done crying about this. So you just let a few tears fall before standing up and heading to the bathroom, wanting to get cleaned up as soon as you possibly can. You groan when you see yourself in the mirror, covered in love bites and cum.

You wonder how Niragi will react when he finds out; because he inevitably will. It wasn’t unheard of Alphas to fight to the death over an Omega; you just wish that isn’t what is about to happen. You don’t think you can live with that.

You step in the shower for the second time that night and vigorously rub your skin, trying to erase any and every sign of Chishiya off your body. Mission impossible, of course; his scent is still all over you as you get out of the shower. Next, you try to clean Niragi’s shirt. At least that one still smells faintly of cinnamon and wood.

As you should too, remarks the voice in your head.

You barely sleep that night.

You feel like a zombie the next morning and, as per usual, you stick to your room. You’re particularly into avoiding people today. Well, two people. So you keep to your room and jump between reading, to napping, to overthinking until you get a headache and then fall asleep.

A sudden knock on your door wakes you up, and you notice it’s almost night outside. You trip on your way to the door, opening it to reveal Chishiya on the other side. You scowl and move to close the door in his face, but his foot stops you.

“What?” you ask.

“We’re in the same group tonight,” he says, raising a piece of paper. “And before you say no, remember that you’re still under evaluation.”

“I have enough visa days,” you say, forcing the door on his foot. He doesn’t budge. You sigh and count to ten. You can do this; just another game. “Fine. But tell Ann that after this I’m only going out when I need to.”

You grab your jacket and get out, following Chishiya. You don’t say a word and neither does he. Your body feels his presence though, and you’re sure he can smell it in you. Smell himself in you.

You get in a van with your group, a bunch of people you faintly recognize but know no names. Chishiya seats right at the front, and you cringe as everyone else in the vehicle clearly knows everything that happened between you two. You hear Niragi’s name being whispered around, but try to ignore it, focusing on the road outside as you drive around looking for a game.

“Look there!” someone exclaims.

Koishikawa Botanical Garden.

The whole place is completely dark as you walk through the main gate, the familiar sound of the barrier closing behind you making you tremble with apprehension. A sign at the front says no weapons allowed, and you watch as two of the people in your group leave their weapons behind. Not really a good sign.

A single street lamp casts light on a table right next to the reception. You follow your group as they approach the table, but your attention is focused on your surroundings. You remember being there as a kid; hard to imagine that the beautiful open space full of trees and flowers of every species is now a game arena; a place of death. You wonder what exactly is the game that awaits you.

You focus your attention on the table, retrieving a phone and staring as it does the facial recognition thing it always does. It’s apparently a big game; there are already more than ten people waiting to play, and at least fifteen phones are still on the table.

You sit on a park bench while you wait, bracing yourself against the chilly night air. Chishiya is leaning against a street lamp right in front of you, and you know he’s staring, even though it’s dark and he has his hoodie up and covering his eyes. Your mind keeps rewinding the last twenty-four hours and you try to focus on something else with no success. If you’re not thinking about that, you’re thinking about the imminent game; both make you want to cry and run.

People slowly keep coming in, and you notice as the phones vanish one by one that the game is almost at its full capacity.

A sudden ruckus at the gates snaps everyone’s attention to the entrance, and you swear your heart stops as you see Niragi running in your direction with the most terrifying expression you’ve ever seen on him. He looks furious. Absolutely terrifying.

“I’m gonna rip your fucking heart out!” he screams as he gets closer. You notice his eyes are locked on Chishiya. His eyes; they aren’t human. Neither are his hands, now curved into claws. The other man doesn’t seem scared in the slightest; on the contrary, he looks like he’s having fun.

“Niragi, don’t- “ you scream as he lunges himself at the shorter man. Chishiya is fast though, swiftly dodging the punch before kicking Niragi in the stomach and stepping away.

Niragi huffs and doubles over before standing straight with a growl and trying another swing at the other man. Two men that got in with him try to corner Chishiya, but he just dodges them like it’s the easiest thing in the world.

“Not so bad without your gun, are you?” asks Chishiya in a mocking tone.

“With or without a gun, I’m still going to fucking kill you.” Niragi growls, “You fucked with the wrong wolf.”

Chishiya huffs a laugh, “Actually,” he says with a smirk, nodding in your direction, “I fucked the right wolf.”

Niragi’s eyes finally lock on you, and it’s like he’s seeing you for the first time. Only now his eyes are filled with something that resembles betrayal and pain. You hate it. You look down, trying to make yourself small; you don’t want him to look at you like that. Never.

“I’ll deal with her later,” he says in a cold tone, and you can’t help but flinch. He approaches the table and retrieves the last phone, eyes still on you. “Now I- “

You’re startled when cheery music starts playing all around you and the big screen you hadn’t noticed at the roof of the reception lits up.

“Registration has closed,” says a feminine robot voice, “The game will now commence.”

You look at your phone as it lits up.

Difficulty, Ten of Spades.

Game, “Akazukin: Red Riding Hood.”

Next Chapter

#alice in borderland #alice in borderland fanfic #niragi suguru #niragi x reader #chishiya shuntaro #niragi fic #chishiya x reader #also on ao3

349 notes · View notes

inevitably-johnlocked · 3 years

Note

Hey steph!! This might be a specific ask but could u like recommend me some fic thats like slow burn, unresolved sexual tension, and some bottomlock. And please please please let it be long so that it hits the sweet spot of satisfying your fic needs but also not stupidly long. Also I love your blog

Hi Lovely!!

AHHHH I’m glad you enjoy!! I try my best, LOL.

AHH I’ve SO MANY slow burn fics, it’s ridiculous, and I do have separate lists for bottomlock, so I can direct you to those.... BUT I DON’T HAVE A LIST FOR MY U.S.T. FICS YES. So can I do that??? Please??? ANY EXCUSE TO START A NEW LIST :| Hee hee. Forgive me???

AND as per usual, all my fics are in word-count order, so you can start at the bottom and work your way up, hee hee. CHEERS!

As usual, add your own, friends!!

First, here’s the lists you asked for:

Love Confessions / Slow Burn / Dev. Rel. (Fluff Version)

Falling In Love / Slow Burn / Dev. Rel. || [MOBILE POST] (April 2019)

Platonics & Domestics Pt 2 / Hugs, Cuddles & Kisses Pt. 3 / Tooth-Rotting Fluff Pt. 5 / Love Confessions, Slow Burn & Dev. Rel. Pt. 2 / Established Relationship Pt. 3

Slow Burn / Dev. Rel. / Falling in Love Pt. 3 (Nov. 2019)

Slow Burn / Dev Rel. Pt. 4 (Apr 2020)

Bottomlock (April 2019)

Bottomlock Pt 2

And now, check out my UST/URT list :)

UNRESOLVED SEXUAL / ROMANTIC TENSION

The Other Shoe by thewaitwasworthitlove - (NR, 1,053 w., 1 Ch. || Pining Sherlock, Angst, URT, Post-TSo3) - Sherlock realizes how deep in love he has fallen for John. Only Sherlock Holmes would manage to be more shattered than crystal dropped on concrete.

Clarity by socomessnow (thoughtfulwishing) (NR, 1,283 w., 1 Ch. || Post-HLV, POV Sherlock, Pining Sherlock, Tarmac Scene, Stream of Consciousness, URT, First Person Present Tense, Implied/Referenced Drug Use) - During-and-post-HLV piece tracking Sherlock’s thought process from his phone call with Mycroft to his return to the airfield. Part 1 of Rifts

Untouchable by greengrapegaze (T, 1,368 w., 1 Ch. || Pre-S3, UST/URT, Oblivious John, Lonely Sherlock, Angst with Happy Ending, Emotional Hurt / Comfort, Emotional Sherlock, POV Sherlock, Pining Sherlock) – “He never would. Petty, childish, immature-bitter. Jealous. She had all that he wanted. All he could never have.” Part 1 of Steps to a Bittersweet Symphony

Love Hurts by Grac3 (T, 2,215 w., 1 Ch. || Magical Realism, Pining Sherlock, One-Sided Pining / URT, Sherlock / John Whump, Angst, Ambiguous Ending) – In a world where someone's physical injuries manifest themselves on the person who is in love with them, John didn't think that there would ever be anyone who was willing to risk falling in love with him - until he got shot on a case, and it didn't hurt. Unrequited Johnlock.

The Dance Lesson by bittergreens (G, 4,596 w., 1 Ch. || TSo3 Missing Scene, Dancing, Pining Sherlock, URT/UST, Romance, Angst, POV John) – Sherlock teaches John to dip. Part 1 of Goodnight, Vienna

There's Something Living in These Lines by teahigh (orphan_account) (M, 4,676 w., 1 Ch. || Mutual Pining, Love Letters, Angst, Mutual Pining, UST / URT, Dirty Talk) – Two men, complete opposites in almost every way, who speak only in letters and pages torn from books.

You Can't Always Get What You Want by hubblegleeflower (E, 4,804 w., 1 Ch. || Pining, Sexual Tension, UST / RST, First Time) – John wants. He always has, but now that he's living with Sherlock again, it's all he can do to hold it back. And Sherlock isn't helping...

Wasted Hours by songlin (E, 4,973 w., 1 Ch. || Omegaverse || O!John/A!Sherlock, Pining, UST, Angst & Porn) – John is respectful. John keeps his distance. He doesn’t look at Sherlock when Sherlock decides trousers are for dull people. He doesn’t breathe in and savor it when Sherlock flings himself onto the couch first thing in the morning, wafting alpha scent, dressing gown settling around him in a cloud of blue silk. He doesn’t linger when he’s piecing Sherlock back together after a fight, even though he’s half-dressed and beautiful and right there. He can ignore it. He can control it.

Captain John Watson, Genetics, and Other Crazy Things by cyerus (M, 5,581 w., 1 Ch. || Torchwood Crossover || Humour / Crack, Jealous Sherlock, Sexual Magnet John, Captain John, UST / RST, Three Continents Watson) – The explanation for John "Three Continents" Watson? Jack Harkness is his father. Sherlock doesn't know whether he's going to die from jealousy or sexual frustration first.

No Light, No Light (in your bright blue eyes) by orphan_account (G, 5,915 w., 1 Ch. || Angst, Pining, Songfic, Mutual Unrequited Love, Unresolved Tension, UST/URT) – Relates to both Sherlock's and John's feelings for each other and highlights select moments of hurt and inner turmoil starting from right before the fall all the way to HLV.

Drawstring by May_Shepard (E, 7,412 w., 1 Ch. || Post S3/TAB, Friends to Lovers, UST/RST, Fluff and Smut, Post-TAB, John POV, Sherlock’s Pyjamas, Rimming, Wanking) – John is bothered by Sherlock’s slowly-falling jim-jams… as in hot and bothered and he is trying to deal with a sexy dishevelled Sherlock while also keeping his pining in check.

High and Tight, Soft and Loose by cwb (E, 7,429 w., 1 Ch. || Jealous John, Miscommunications / Misunderstandings, First Kiss / Time, BAMF John, Insecure Sherlock, Clueless Sherlock, POV John, Embarrassed John, Adorable Sherlock, Junk Size, UST / RST) – John pressed the knuckle of his index finger against his mouth and sighed. “So, you're coiled like a spring and ready to be ... sprung?” “If you want to be pedestrian about it, yes.” “Like I said, you should do something about that.” “And like I said, pedestrian. What would you have me do? Take up jogging? Yoga? Oh! Unless you mean –” “I don't mean anything. Let’s drop it.”

Alone On the Water by Mad_Lori (G, 7,725 w., 1 Ch. || MCD, UST/URT, Angst, Euthanasia, Love Confessions) – Sherlock Holmes never expected to live a long life, but he never imagined that it would end like this.

All the Times Something ALMOST Happened by allonsys_girl (T, 9,049 w., 6 Ch. || POV Sherlock, Pining Sherlock, Canon Compliant, Angst, Friendship/Love, UST) – John and Sherlock dancing around what they dance around in canon.

Someone I Love by hudders-and-hiddles (M, 10,002 w., 2 Ch. || Canon Compliant, HLV-Filler Fic, Pre-Slash, Jealous John, PIning Sherlock, Angst & Fluff, UST/URT, Dog Tags) – John gets married and Sherlock finds comfort in wearing John's identity tags around his wrist.

Ravish Me by amalnahurriyeh (E, 10,025 w., 1 Ch. || UST / RST, Makeup / Lipstick, Sympathetic Sally, Experiments, Pining John, First Kiss, Face Fucking / BJ’s, Cuddling) – Sherlock is experimenting with patterns of wear on lipstick in daily encounters. John is going to go insane.

Their Great Reward by BeautifulFiction (T, 10,095 w., 1 Ch. || UST, First Kiss, Fluff) – Boxing day, in John's opinions, is the worst day of the year. Christmas is over, the tree is wilting and stripped of gifts, and there's a week of dead-time until the clean slate of the new year. However the combination of a blizzard, a power-cut and Sherlock might just make it a day to remember.

The Five Stages of Mourning, Plus One by SunnyRea (T, 10,557 w., 1 Ch. || MCD, Pining / Grieving Sherlock, URT, Heavy Angst, Sherlock’s Mind Palace, Drug Use, Graphic Death, Depression, Unhappy Ending) – Sherlock did not want this, did not want another stalemate with John in the middle, a gun in Jim's hand. This cannot have happened without a sign. There has to be something he missed anything which said today is the day I kill for real.

Absence Makes the Heart Grow Fonder by cypress_tree (E, 10,669 w., 1 Ch. || UST/RST, For an Experiment) – John helps Sherlock with an experiment: for an entire month, they are not allowed to touch each other and must remain at least one metre apart at all times.

I'm content as we are (but) by inqui (The_Circus) (E, 13,086 w., 1 Ch. || Jealous John, UST/RST, Pining, Victor Trevor, Minor Whump, First Kiss / Time, Misunderstandings) – In which John Watson sees something unusual, becomes jealous, and makes too much of a small thing as an old friend of Sherlock's shows up in the middle of a case.

Say For Me, Love by MirabileLectu (T, 13,147 w., 1 Ch. || UST, First Kiss, Drama, Pining John, Victor Trevor) – If you had asked John this morning what the result of his quiet afternoon at home would be, discovering a truth about Sherlock's past startling enough to shift the foundations of their friendship would not have been his first guess. So naturally, that was what was bound to happen.

Barricade by stitchy (M, 14,127 w., 1 Ch. || HLV Fix It, Friends to Lovers, Angst, Happy Ending, UST, Mary’s Not Nice, First Time, Pining Sherlock, Time Skip Filler, Drunkenness) – Sherlock has been struggling to keep his feelings at bay for everyone's sake. Part 1 of Barricade

Second Chance by SilentAuror (E, 15,816 w., 1 Ch. || Post-HLV, Post-Divorce, Friends to Lovers, UST, Romance) – Now that John's divorce has gone through and the dust is settling, Sherlock thinks that he would very much like to see if there is any possibility of moving their friendship in another direction. The only thing is, he has no idea how to go about doing that...

Anytime by SilentAuror (E, 17,995 w., 1 Ch. || UST, Porn With Feels, POV Sherlock, Romance, UST/URT, Happy Ending, Drunken Endeavours) – Sherlock blinks and attempts to focus. There is a little too much vodka in his veins at the moment and it’s having an unfortunate effect on his brain and retinas both. There are two Johns sitting across from him, and both of them are frowning at him. “You’re drunk,” the Johns tell him. Sherlock blinks some more. “Says the man with Mrs Hudson’s doily on his head.”

John Watson doesn't have a Boyfriend by naughtyspirit (E, 18,932 w., 7 Ch. || UST / URT, Fluff & Smut, Voyeurism, Masturbation) – John's date has gone very well. Sherlock requires tea. John wishes he hadn't resolved that their relationship was strictly hands off and isn't about to address it. Unless he has to. Smut, fluff and shower time for a naked John Watson.

For you, there's only me by shock_blanket (E, 19,557 w., 7 Ch. || Jealous Idiots, Virgin Sherlock, UST/RST, Pining, Miscommunication, First Kiss / Time, Insecure Sherlock, Masturbation) – Sherlock realizes he has fallen in love with John, but believes he is unlovable. Cue lots of pining and jealousy on Sherlock's part, followed by our favorite cuddly marksman making it all better. Because for Sherlock, there's only John.

Love Is by SilentAuror (E, 21,508 w., 1 Ch. || Angst, UST / URT, Post HLV, Romance) – At Mrs Hudson’s urging, Sherlock finally decides to tell John how he feels about him. Part 1 of Love Is

Brief Conversations with the Woman by May_Shepard (E, 21,906 w., 20 Ch. || Pining, Love Fairy Irene, Filler Fic, UST/URT, Drug Use, Clueless Sherlock, Relationship Advice, Angst w/ Happy Ending) – Sherlock has a puzzle to solve, and his name is John Watson.

Sonatina in G Minor by SilentAuror (E, 22,574 w., 1 Ch. || Case Fic, POV Sherlock, Angst, UST, Sherlock’s Violin, Post-S3, Romance) – John has come back to Baker Street, but Sherlock doesn't understand the strange tension between them, even after he begins teaching John to play the violin at John's request.

Knotted by naughtyspirit (E, 23,166 w., 4 Ch. || UST/URT, Cuddling, Sharing Body Heat, Confessions, Kissing, Masturbation, Frustration, BAMF!John) – John has to cancel a date because of Sherlock's case, which leads them to be tied up in a basement from which they have to escape. They get wet, get tied up close and John has to step up and save them. Because he's pretty. And hot. And just a little bit of a BAMF.

Hellfire by testosterone_tea (E, 28,596 w., 9 Ch. || Fantasy / Magic / Mages / Elementals AU || Mage Sherlock, Elemental John, Developing Relationship, Torture, Powerful / BAMF John, POV Alternating, Dark / Blood Magic, UST, First Kiss) – Sherlock is a Mage that gets involved with a case involving Dark Summoning rituals, leading him to John Watson, a man with Berserker blood. The only thing is, Berserkers have been extinct for centuries. And of course, nothing involving Mycroft and his interfering ways is ever simple. This time, even Sherlock may have bitten off more than he can chew.

That Partitioning of the Things of Youth by wearitcounts (E, 35,353 w., 7 Ch. || Humour and Angst, Post-TRF, Fake Relationship, UST / RST, Friends to Lovers, Jealous John) – Victor Trevor is in town, and nobody's happy.

The Case of the Vanishing Pants by SwissMiss (E, 44,025 w., 6 Ch. || Five and Ones, Post-TRF, Case Fic, UST, Homophobia, Friends to Lovers, Pining John, Showering Together, Couple for a Case, Sherlock’s Bum, Fantasies, Jealous Sherlock) – Five times John and Sherlock lost their pants in the course of a case.

Wars We Fought, Things We're Not by blueink3 (M, 55,204 w., 10 Ch. || Post S3 / Post TAB, Parentlock, Fluff & Angst, Kidnapping, Whump, Post-TAB, UST/URT, 3G, Mild Peril, Slow Burn, Couple for a Case, Protective Mycroft, Infant Death Pre-Story, Friends to Lovers) – Five months after John's world has fallen apart, Mycroft sends the consulting detective and his doctor on a case that neither is prepared for.

A Hundred Crimson Sols by elldotsee (E, 55,536 w., 16 Ch. || Astronauts AU || Mars Exploration / Space Travel, Slow Burn, Shy Sherlock, Scientist Sherlock / Biomed Engineer John, Alternating POV, Mutual Pining, UST, Angst with Happy Ending, Domestic Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Injuries, Suicidal Ideation, Zero-G Sex) – Will Holmes is a chemical researcher recognized widely for his contributions to the new Mars exploration program. Thanks to his ground-breaking developments, the IMMC (International Mars Mission Corporation) is one step closer to Martian colonization. Will and his team of scientists are headed out on the first of three manned missions before the first group of settlers arrive. Three days before launch, one of the crew has to be replaced. Will panics because...new people. The replacement is of course one John Watson, biomedical engineer and space hottie who was pretty sure he had retired from actual space exploration and was now content to work in the nice, quiet research lab. Can the crew survive this TOTALLY ROUTINE trip? Will they be able to endure each other for the looooooong trip in close quarters? Gonna be a wild ride... prepare for blast off. Part 1 of SpaceBois go to Space

The Baker Street Nativity by SwissMiss (E, 99,662 w., 23 Ch. || Nativity! AU || Teacher Sherlock / TA John, Pining, Sherlock POV, UST, Angst, Christmas, Music/Song Fic, Anal / BJ’s, First Kiss / Time) – Fusion between Sherlock (BBC) and Nativity! (2009 movie starring Martin Freeman). Sherlock is a primary school teacher and John is assigned to be his classroom assistant. Together, they are charged with putting on the school's Nativity play. What could possibly go wrong? Part 1 of The Baker Street Nativity Verse

A Further Sea by i_ship_an_armada & ShinySherlock (E, 125,492 w., 23 Ch. || Historical Pirates AU || Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Doctor John / Pirate Captain Sherlock, Sailing, UST / RST, Masturbation, Action / Adventure, Mild Angst & Peril, Romance, Shaving, Molly/Janine, Bottomlock, Hand / Blow Jobs, Past Drug Use, Slow Burn, Mild Violence, Facial Shaving, Happy Ending) – Here be a tale of adventure for both body and soul, but beware if ye be not of stout heart, for this be piratelock, ya savvy? Luckless ship's surgeon John Watson takes a chance, and finds himself eye to eye with The Ghost, the scourge of the seven seas and a definite thorn in the side of the blaggard, James Moriarty. But when John finds there's more to this most cunning pirate than be meetin' the eye, he has to choose... is it a pirate's life for him?

The Adventure of the Silver Scars by tangledblue (NR [M], 142,458 w., 41 Ch. || S3 Fix-It, Post-HLV/ Post-TAB / Canon Compliant, Case Fic, No Baby, Angst, Humour, UST, Slow Burn, Angry John, Reconciliation, Not Nice Mary / Leaving Mary, Dependent Sherlock, Pining Sherlock, Caretaker John, Fist Fights, It’s An Experiment, Virgin Sherlock, Dancing, Drugging, John Whump, Pet Names, Sherlock’s Mind Palace, Scars) – It’s been thirteen months since Mary shot Sherlock and John finds he’s still pissed off about it. Sherlock had thought everything was settled: John and Mary, domestic bliss. But when John turns up at Baker Street with suitcases, the world’s only consulting detective might not be prepared for the consequences. A new case. Some old scores to settle. Certain danger. Concertos, waltzes, and whisky.

Midnight Blue Serenity by BeautifulFiction (E, 151,907 w., 19 Ch. || Friends to Lovers, Gay Bar / For a Case, Drugs, Pining, Case Fic, UST) – When Sherlock infiltrates a club in order to track down a serial killer, his altered appearance is enough to make John question his assumption that Sherlock is beyond his reach. However, is he the only one who appreciates his flatmate's charms, or is Sherlock at risk of becoming the next victim?

#steph replies #johnlock fic recs #my fic recs #ust fics #urt fics #babyyoushouldseemeinacrown

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youarejesting · 3 years

Text

Mania.4

[MASTER LIST] [Mania Master list]

Beta: N/A Rating: Mature 18+ Pairing: BTS OT7 Genre: Fantasy, Romance, Comedy, Omegaverse Words: 1.3k Blood types: Namjoon, Jhope, Jungkook, Yoongi (A) Taehyung (AB) Jin, Jimin and Yoongi (O) (Jimin in real life is an A blood type)

Summary: At eighteen everyone takes a blood test to find out their blood types. A, B, or O. Each blood type represents the person’s secondary gender Alpha, Beta or Omega and can be Dominant (+) or Recessive (-).

When small thin Yoongi receives his letter he doesn’t expect A+. There was no way he was an Alpha especially not a dominant. But as time passes he shows no Alpha nor Omega tendencies and frankly he doesn’t care. Working in his father’s electrical business helps pay the bills but Yoongi’s real passion is music.

One very hot day in the roof space of a luxury apartment that Yoongi is rewiring an intoxicatingly pleasant smell churns his insides and he finds himself in need of something to quench his thirst.

[First] [Prev] [Mania] [Next]

Yoongi almost felt normal, well his ‘normal’ before everything he knew turned upside and inside out. He was back to working in his father’s business and all he had to do was take one small pill. Pulling on his jumpsuit, he called his father just to confirm, he was perfectly capable of completing the work he missed.

Grabbing the keys, the bottle of pills, he decided against the stronger dose as the mild one worked perfectly fine yesterday. Getting into the van he put the address into his GPS and drove to the gated estate in which the famous band members stayed. It was a long drive but Yoongi couldn’t even bring himself to be tired, he wondered if it was the iced americano that made him happy. He repressed any thoughts that it might have something to do with the fact he was heading back to the apartment filled with the impressive Alphas and beautiful Omegas.

He would be lying if he hadn’t felt his heart flutter when he thought about seeing Seokjin and Jimin again in the flesh and a tiny flutter in his tummy when he thought of the Powerful Alpha’s each with a delicious scent that haunted him.

Yoongi pulled into the driveway and stopped before the Barrier Arm his window in line with the security booth, he leaned over showing his ID and giving his business.

“You aren’t on the list?” Yoongi frowned and called the number Seokjin had given him and it went through on the third call.

“Hello, this is Kim Seokjin,” the omega answered, making Yoongi take a sharp breath, his mouth feeling dry.

“Hey, it’s Min Yoongi, your electrician, I am out the front to finish up the repairs but I can’t get in, I can come back another day if it’s not a convenient time” Yoongi flushed as the security guard watched him, it was awkward.

“I will come down, wait there” the phone line went dead and Yoongi forced a laugh.

“Have you had a long day?” it was such an awkward question on top of an awkward situation, Yoongi wanted to leave quickly. His savior came in the form of Kim Seokjin who slipped into the car and the barrier arm was lifted.

“Why are you so pink?” Seokjin asked, placing the back of his hand on Yoongi’s forehead.

“I just made an absolute fool of myself with the gatekeeper,” Yoongi huffed his lips pursing, “I am never coming back here again,”

“Oh, that’s a shame,” Seokjin laughed “I enjoy your company and I wouldn’t mind seeing you again, well that’s it you can never leave, if you see him again you will turn into a tomato”

Yoongi laughed wholeheartedly, something about Seokjin’s expressions was so lively and comical and it made Yoongi feel giddy just seeing it. Like he could play around and not be judged, not that Yoongi had ever really cared what people thought of him. It’s just he usually had a stone-cold exterior and found it awkward to speak about anything outside of a professional setting.

So it was easy to laugh and joke around even embarrass himself in front of the omega when it couldn’t compare to what had happened during his heat, this man had seen him at his worst and yet still wanted to be friends and that's what gave Yoongi the confidence to relax.

“Come on in, let me help carry some things,” Seokjin said, “Oh, I forgot to warn you, Jimin is in heat but he is in his bedroom and that shouldn’t affect anything right?”

Yoongi shrugged unsure if it would affect him or not, he hadn’t been exposed to anyone in a heat, hell he had only had a heat once. “I’m not sure,”

“How did the appointment with the specialist go, you were available, I didn’t know if you were busy on that day so I just guessed, I hoped you could make it, it’s not easy getting into seeing the specialist there as she is very good.” Seokjin said

“She doesn’t take new patients either so I am wondering what strings you pulled to get me an appointment?” Yoongi huffed the stairs and took a lot out of him and the two stopped halfway on a small landing to catch their breath. The two laughed at one another, “I am getting too old for this?”

“Tell me about it, everyone else seems to be spring chickens and I am over here taking afternoon naps,” Seokjin laughed “The only thing that doesn’t age is my pretty face and my attitude.”

“I want a nap,” Yoongi mumbled, getting to the top of the staircase and walking down the hall until they reached a familiar door.

Seokjin opened the door, with a cheeky grin, “You can take a nap and finish the work in an hour if you want?”

The house was as luxurious as Yoongi remembered, he declined the offer to rest wanting to get his work finished. He stepped in hesitantly and the scents lingered in the walls carpet and floated in the air like pollen. It was captivating and safe and for the first time since he left he relaxed.

Taking out the clip board, Yoongi went over the details of where he was adding new powerpoints and light switches that he had run through the roof the last time he was here. He switched off the power as he always did for his own safety and got to work. It was easy and with every breath he felt his body relax calmer and calmer until his eyes shut for a moment.

“Jin, the air conditioner isn’t working,” Yoongi caught the most delicious scent drifting down the hallway and when he turned he saw a very naked and extremely sweaty Hoseok in his boxes.

“Oh, I am sorry, I didn’t know we had guests?” Hoseok said, Yoongi didn’t want to admit it but the band members had left a strong impression on him and he spent his time researching their music and finding out about each member's personality.

Yoongi was captivated by Jimin his singing and dancing, the way he moved was honestly so captivating that Yoongi could admit he had fallen in love with Jimin when he performed. But, his eyes were often stolen by Hoseok, in interviews he stole the spotlight and made Yoongi laugh, and in his dance he could be a total wild card. Was he sweet, sexy, tough, romantic, bouncy and light, or soft and passionate?

Hoseok seemed the total opposite of Yoongi, Hoseok was outgoing and loud by nature, and well that intrigued Yoongi a lot more than he wanted to admit.

“The power is out, because Yoongi is finishing up the electrical work,” Seokjin said exasperated, “maybe try not to…”

Seokjin dropped his voice and Hoseok giggled, “You know Jimin whines if I don’t give him what he wants.”

Moving to the fridge which was right beside Yoongi. Yoongi tried to focus on his work as he leant over the counter to reach the back wall where he was attaching wires for a powerpoint.

Hoseok moving closer pushed his scent in Yoongi’s direction making his stomach churn and his knees weaken. He reached into his pocket and took the mild pill and he sighed in relief, knowing he was safe.

What he didn’t expect was for Hoseok to slide past him, he put a hand on Yoongi’s waist as a preemptive warning that he was stepping behind him, and he reached up trying to grab a glass from the cupboard above Yoongi’s head.

Yoongi felt the churn in his stomach again, this time heavier, his legs shook and he gripped the counter a small whimper falling past his lips. Yoongi tried to lift his chest from the counter but it was a form of submission and his body automatically doubled over the bench for the dominant Alpha behind him. His earthy scent was intoxicating, grapefruit, pepper and cedar. He was fresh, spicy, and warm.

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sourestlemon · 3 years

Text

So. I made a bet with my friend that I could get through Omegaverse Haikyuu fanfiction because he says I can’t so if I read https://archiveofourown.org/works/13330632/chapters/30514041 that I’m going to get free icecream and twenty bucks.

But still, Bokuaka! Bokuaka is beautiful, I should rant about it more actually

This is me talking about this fic as I read, so it’ll be updated until I finish

Note, I’ve finished and it’s very very long. You’ve been warned

There’s my review and meta at the end of this as well as some critiques

Spoilers ahead.

“The Jewel of Seijou”

THE WHAT NOW

IWAOIIII

Bokuaka is so fucking cute dear god.

Oh. It’s sinful now

Ushijima better stop throwing shade at my boi’s

“"I can't believe you all think that you can go against the crown and live!" Ushishima says silencing them all. The alpha was slowly emitting his pheromones wanting to show them all his superiority. No one said a word against him. "Toru! I didn't know you'll be as lowly to use your family name to gather us here!" The alpha seethed to the omega that could have been his wife. Iwazumi hackles raised and bared his lips at the beginning of a growl. "And you!" Ushijima turned to Bokuto full on emitting his pheromones making the rest of the alpha's shoulder hackle cautiously and Oikawa to cling at Iwazumi. But Bokuto meet Ushijima calmly, unfazed by the bloodlust while Akaashi was frozen to his spot but didn't show any emotion.”

So what we get out of this paragraph is

1) Bitchy Ushi. I love Ushijima don’t get me wrong he’s precious but like. This fic Ushijima? Son of a bitch walking up in here like “Toru! How dare you be so lowly—“ and fucking trying to dominate everyone.

2) Protective Iwaizumi. Protect the precious Seijou Jewel. Do it, fight for him, protect him he’s scared.

3) Is Ushijima salty because Oikawa didn’t choose him? Oh god, he is isn’t he.

4) Akaashi’s go to emotion isn’t emotion.

5) Shits about to go down, Bokuto is gonna flip eventually, if Ushi threatens anyone—it’d probably be Oikawa or Akaashi seeing as they’re omega’s—I can see Bokuto and Iwaizumi just flipping their shit.

God I’m way to invested. Why did I read this

USHIJIMA IS A COWARDLY LITTLE BITCH IN THIS FIC, STAB HIM HINATA

D O I T

Awww Kageyama cares, Tsukki cares

OH MY GOD TENDOU!

More people came surrounding them. "What the hell," Akaashi recognized Iwazumi's voice.

Iwaizumi’s reaction is the only respectable reaction.

Wait this has major character death in the tags

Fuck

Everyone has decided that Oikawa and Akaashi must be defended but just once I want them to flip their shit and kill someone. Just once.

Bokuto, Lev and Iwaizumi all want to protect Oikawa but Iwaizumi doesn’t even fucking trust em.

Why does everyone act like Nishinoya not wanting to move on so quickly is a bad thing? It’s perfectly reasonable and I hate how everyone is like “What’s wrong with you, do you not like us?” And getting super standoffish or snappish simply because Nishinoya loves Asahi so much and doesn’t want to feel like they didn’t need him.

I really don’t like how Nishinoya/Tanaka/Ennoshita became a thing in this fic. It would be cute if it didn’t just happen because Nishinoya was desperate and if he wasn’t he wouldn’t have fucked Tanaka.

Oh dear god I don’t want Kenma to die.

Oh thank god it’s okay.

Fuck I forgot they had boobs

Did Bokuto almost name the Kuroken baby Oya but changed last minute?

BO ISN’T COMING BACK IS HE?????????

I’m feelin a little sniffly. I might fucking cry over an Omegaverse fic. Oh how the mighty have fallen

Oh my god the stars. I don’t think Bo is coming back y’all. I’m so nervous

The fuckin royals aren’t getting Keiji. No. Nuh-uh FUCK THAT SHIT

THAT’S BOKUTO’S MATE STAY AWAY FROM HIM

-cue mac worrying about oikawa because seijou is allied with fukurodani and an easy way to tear seijou away from the alliance is to kidnap oikawa and iwaizumi might split to keep him safe and ushi fucking knows this and possibly tendou also oiks is pretty as fuck-

BOKUTO IS OKAY!

Iwaizumi making Bokuto promise to save Oikawa if things went to shit makes me so worried but the same time his lil speech made my IwaOi heart so happy.

Suga bby...

BOKUTO JUST KILLED A FUCKING CHILD

Tendou, Ushijima I never thought I’d say this but I fucking hate them right now. They better not hurt the other best Boi’s.

Ushijima is salty as fuck confirmed.

"You truly are a piece of art," Ushijima said gently ...."But not as beautiful as him," the alpha muttered as he threw the omega to the floor.

So, this little snippet sent disgusting shivers down my spine for two reasons.

1) Ushijima just yeeted Akaashi, my son and

2) Any reader knows who the ‘he’ Ushi is talking about is, the only person in this book who is said to be as beautiful as Akaashi. You guessed it, the boi who rejected Ushi-fucking-jima, Jewel of Seijou himself Oikawa Tooru.

The thing that grosses me out the most about this paragraph just on its own is that Ushijima is either guessing about what Oikawa looks like, or he actually knows which overall just gives me the heebie jeebies because Oikawa definitely didn’t want that. What makes my skin crawl in this little snippet is what Ushijima would do when if he got his angry little hands on Oikawa—or Iwaizumi, but Iwa would probably be killed or used as a bargaining chip.

Hmmmmm, I’m pretty sure Ushi is in love with Tendou but the beauty statement still stands possibly???? Unless specified otherwise, because Akaashi and Oikawa are canonically considered the most beautiful people in the fic.

Also this entire chapter just makes me feel so gross, fuck Ushijima man. Fuck him.

My Ushijima loving heart hurts reading this fic.

I just want Akaashi and Oikawa to straight up kill someone. Please, anyone who I don’t care about

I FUCKING SEE THE MAJOR CHARACTER DEATH WARNING AND I DON’T LIKE IT

FUCK

NOT BOKUTO

WAIT IS HE ALIVE

I WANNA SEE MY LITTLE BOY

HERE HE COMES

I WANT TO SEE MY LITTLE BOY

"I came right on time," Bokuto forced out his voice cracking with emotion. "Now I can engulf you in my arms and brighten your days despite the absence of the sun. You will no longer have to endure the cold winters alone. I'll be with you, I be there for you and our child," The alpha vowed his hands itching in need.

"Are you going to leave us again?" Akaashi needed to know. The omega already knew that he wouldn't be able to survive being apart from the alpha. He knew that he wouldn't win the battle with the overwhelming loneliness.

"The seas could dry up, the mountains could turn to pebbles, the trees could die and the whole world could be on fire and I still won't leave your side."

That was all Akashi needed to hear as he leaped into his alphas arm and let go of all the pain he has held in

I’m not crying I swear

They walked together side by side and Akaashi finally faced them. They were both beaten, bloody, and torn butinstead of feeling satisfaction he felt remorse. They both looked at him with soft, wide eyes, and he realized that this was the moment they were waiting for. They wanted to see the child that they both desperately wanted and Akaashi decided to give them a parting gift.

Akaashi had won, he had won from the very beginning and he held his trophy who was a small babe with golden orbs, with mutant white and black hair. He hadn't lied to Tendou when he had said that the baby looked exactly like his father.

OH MY FUCKING GOOOOOOOOOOD I’M SOBBING DON’T TOUCH ME

Meta and Review

So I just read A/B/O for the first time and I knew absolutely nothing about the entire trope that Mpreg existed and to stay the hell away from it. Please remember this in the meta and tell me if there way of dividing characters is ever specified or if it’s just decided by top-bottom dynamics.

Wow.

The story was pretty good outside of what I’m about to talk about. I liked the ships and most of the buildup, the worldbuilding seems solid, the war and UshiTens situation was really interesting to me and it made Ushi and Tendou a bit morally gray and could’ve talked about how people could do bad things for what they thought were the right reason and everything was clean cut.

Overall? Eh. Could’ve been done better

Not onto the rest

This doesn’t seem as toxic or inherently bad as most fics I’ve seen, I didn’t really like how Omega’s are always inherently feminine—the dresses, jewels, how they’re seen as inherently weaker and sometimes helpless, how they’re always referred to as “my lady”—and aren’t really given another choice because they might have the ability to reproduce in A/B/O but they aren’t women. It’s okay if a man is really feminine but for all of them to be? It rubbed my the wrong way.

I wish that the power structure was handled different in A/B/O in general. Omega’s seem to be treated like they’re helpless and I just...don’t like it? Omega’s might be submissive but that doesn’t make them physically weaker and if it did, I would’ve thought they would have picked up some other useful skills like diplomacy or strategy.

As usually, my example of how a character could’ve been handled better is Oikawa.

He’s my favorite character and I adored him but he just didn’t really deliver. It felt like he was being treated like a kid throughout this entire fic, it didn’t seem like he was doing anything during the war. Even if Omega’s don’t have a lot of physically prowess and abilities, what happened to Oikawa’s strategic and analytical nature? Why was it never mentioned in any of Bokuto’s POV sections because out all the leaders of the Allied Kingdoms, Oikawa is the best strategist—Kuroo is the exception, not the rule and I thought they should’ve been working together because smort boys—but he was simply hidden away.

Now I have no problems with all the protective IwaOi scenes when they’re in immediate danger—it makes perfect sense if Omega’s are physically weaker but have other usable talents that are taken seriously—and Oikawa simply can’t talk his way out of said problem.

I do however, have a problem with cowering Oikawa. That feels so OOC at the beginning of the first scene I cited, where is all of the quick wit and worthless pride from the show? Now, it makes sense for Oikawa to start getting scared and simply slip behind Iwaizumi once Ushijima tries to dominate everyone and all the Alphas start freaking out if Oikawa is at an actual, physical disadvantage—I feel like the alpha’s their have similar frames, or at least most of them do. Bokuto, Ushijima, Kuroo and Iwaizumi are jacked and beefy, everyone but Iwa is relatively tall too. Now, Oikawa’s tall too but he’s much thinner and leaner. I’d be scared too if everyone could break me like a twig if it came down to it—but no ??? Apparently at the first sign of any conflict he just gets scared??? He doesn’t know what’s going on in his own fucking kingdom ???

This is not Oikawa.

I didn’t like how they treated most of the Omega’s actually, it felt like they were just reverted to helpless damsels in distress. What happened to Kenma’s observation skills? Nishinoya’s everything?

More importantly, what decides Alpha’s and Omega’s? Is it up in the air like gender is? What are Beta’s then? It can’t just be who’s top and who’s bottom, that would mean the alpha-beta-omega- status wouldn’t be decided until you had a mate

From what I’ve seen in the fic, it goes by ship dynamics but what if the characters who had more strategic, cunning, observant traits and weren’t as buff and muscly would be Omega’s and had the brain power while characters who relied more on physical prowess would be Alpha’s and dominant in a purely physical way sometimes while characters who were an odd combination of the two would be Beta’s.

Going by my logic, instead of the top being the alpha and the bottom just being an omega without any personality it would be...

Bokuto- Alpha, like he was in the story. He’s definitely more physically inclined then Akaashi.

Akaashi: Omega, same as in the fic. Not to say he isn’t athletic but he relies more on his mind.

Iwaizumi- Alpha, like in the fic but from a purely physical standpoint and because he can rein Oikawa in when his friend starts going nuts.

Oikawa - Beta, he’s quite powerful but he’s also manipulative, strategic and his mind is scary as fuck.

Kuroo- Beta, he relies on his physical prowess and dorkily perfect brain a lot so he’s also a mixture of both.

Kenma- Omega, physically he’s a twig but his mind is what makes him the brain of Nekoma

Hinata- Alpha, he doesn’t use his brain a lot and has a lot of physical power

Kageyama - Beta, he’s pretty smart when it comes to volleyball and he’s also physically strong

Suga - Omega, he’s quite clever and his brain power out ways his physical prowess by a landslide

Daichi- Beta, he firms strategies and relies on his brain, plus his killer thighs

Tsukishima - Beta, he has his hue fur and athleticism but his brain power is also strong as fuck

Yamaguchi - Beta, he seems to be really people smart and eventually his serves are pretty good.

Can Betas get into a relationship with other Betas? I don’t know or care, we stan Alpha-Alpha, Beta-Beta and Omega-Omega ships here

I DON’T KNOW IF THIS IS HOW IT WORKS THO

do I have to read more

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noirlevity · 2 years

Text

Scent chapter 23

Chapter summary: Ainosuke confronts Tadashi about the truth.

Tags: Omegaverse, forced bonding, sorta angst, slow burn, sorta reversible but I am for top!Tadashi so maybe no explicit smut with bottom Tada in the future

A/N: They are so cute together! T.T

Read: AO3 || 1 2 3 4 4.5 4.6 4.7 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23

Tadashi takes the eco bag he dropped at the entrance and takes it to the kitchen. After putting the dry goods inside the cabinets, he put away the vegetables, fruits, and other things that needed to be refrigerated. After a while, he thought about what to cook for dinner. Should he wait for Take to decide? While he waited, he decided to make rice instead.

As he worked, Tadashi's mind could not help but remember the sight of Ainosuke's naked flesh and aroused face. It was so intrusive a thought that poor Tadashi could not help blushing up to his ears as he put the groceries away. What they did earlier felt too surreal.

Never in a million years had Tadashi dreamt of a day when Ainosuke would beg him to fuck him. Sure, he had fantasized about doing it with Ainosuke multiple times. They already did it. But having sex after clarifying their feelings for each other and knowing what they mean to each other gave a new flavor to the intimacy of their sex. The scent that enveloped them both was tantalizing. The hunger they had for each other deepened the more they touched.

Tadashi was embarrassed at what he had done and how he had reacted when the reins that held him back were finally loose. The very thought of it makes Tadashi's pale cheeks burn even hotter. His hands shook as a wave of excitement rushed through his heart. There was no mistake. They were going out now. No matter how Tadashi tried to keep their relationship friendly and professional, they ended up in a romantic relationship anyway.

Romantic relationships is a topic foreign to Tadashi, as his dating history did not allow him to stop and think about what they truly meant. Consequently, to his mind, having sex and being intimate with his master would now be on the regular. He finds relief in this since it would allow him to manage his heat properly. It would help him be at ease every time it came. The thought of being free from such a burden put a faint smile on his face.

The aftermath of his bad decisions was worse than he thought. When he went to see his doctor, he learned that abusing suppressants might cause complications like heart disease, memory loss, and infertility. Tadashi doesn't care about the consequences of his actions, and nor does he regret doing what he did. To him, being able to stay by Ainosuke's side was worth it.

A click on the door makes Tadashi look over his shoulder. Take returned with a noticeable frown on his face. "What's wrong?" Tadashi asked.

"Nothing. I'm just tired. "

Take's eyes shifted to Tadashi's hands, which were preparing the rice. Take walked to the kitchen and opened the refrigerator.

"I already started. I haven't decided what to cook though."

"Since your boss is here, why don't we make hotpot? It's also the weekend and we bought a lot of beers, right? I think we also got snacks. It's perfect."

"You're right." Tadashi smiles faintly.

As they made hotpot, silence naturally settled.

"He doesn't like me, does he?" Take broke the ice.

Tadashi, who was cutting some onions, paused.

"I don't think he hates you."

The way Tadashi said it sounded like he truly believed this. Take was expecting this kind of reaction. Sometimes his friend can be oblivious to other people's affections. It was not a surprise he would be unaware of Ainosuke's displeasure when he was intimate with others. Natsuno had told Take about what happened when Ainosuke first came back from the state, about Ainosuke throwing him a death glare when he was fooling around with Tadashi.

"Because he likes you."

Tadashi's eyes widened in utter shock. He couldn't speak. His reaction only made Take giggle. Take poked him using his elbow. "Your face.

"It's easy to see it, you know."

The words made Tadashi speechless. He doesn't knowhow to respond. Now he was feeling nervous. Should he tell him they were going out? Nervousness was borne with clenched fists. Tadashi managed to fool Take that the reason why his neck down to his upper back was injured was because something fell heavily on him. He wonders how long he can keep lying about Ainosuke.

Tadashi was guilty of lying, but he didn't have a choice; he wasn't ready yet. He didn't know why it was hard for him to tell Take about this when usually he could tell him anything. Once they were finished preparing, Take told Tadashi he could sleep in his room. Take was teasing him when Ainosuke appeared in the kitchen. The master was wearing a hard to ignore frown on his face.

Ainosuke cleared his throat. It forced the two to halt what they were doing. Tadashi looks over where the sound came from and saw the person that had just become his boyfriend. Wearing Take's clothes from head to toe, the style didn't fit with how Ainosuke usually looks when he was about to sleep. The usual luxury pajamas he often wears was now substituted by cotton jogging pants and a somewhat baggy long-sleeved shirt.

His hair loose this time, he didn't look like the well-put-together, slicked-haired Ainosuke on tv and at work. Today he looked like an ordinary man trying to unwind after a long and busy day.

It was a rare sight. Tadashi would have loved to let Ainosuke wear his clothes, but he got so shy at the last minute that he decided to grab Take's clothes instead. Looking at his boyfriend in a different style made Tadashi's heart squeeze. His Ainosuke-sama was so good-looking. So heartwrenchingly cool. The stern facial expression he directed at both him and Take was cute too.

"Shindo-san, you can have Tadashi's room all to yourself. He can sleep with me in my room." Take said beaming, hands perched at his hips. Tadashi panicked. Immediately he interjected, "Take it's fine! I can sleep on the couch."

The two of them were conversing back and forth. Take was saying that Tadashi should sleep in his room. Irritated, Ainosuke snaps, "It's fine I can sleep on the sofa."

"You don't need to treat me differently. I'm here as Tadashi's friend, not as his boss. So I don't mind."

"What are you saying, Shindo-san? You're our guest, so of course, we have to accommodate you well."

The way Take said it ticked Ainosuke off.

"Then I don't mind sleeping with Tadashi." Take paused, and then burst into a laugh.

"Eh? Did you hear that, Tadashi?" Take leans over Tadashi and rests his arm over his shoulder. He leans in on his friend and squeezes him.

"Shindo-san doesn't mind sleeping beside you."

Ainosuke clenched his fists. Take was starting to get on his nerves. Take flashes him a smile. Feeling the tension in the air, Tadashi could only sigh. For some reason Take was always trying to stir things up with Ainosuke. Every time the two meet, it was clear Take was being overly touchy feely towards him.

"I'm fine sleeping on the sofa. There's no need to make a fuss about this."

Take paused and then patted Tadashi on his belly. He said, "If you say so."

The touch was a test. Take takes a glance at Ainosuke and finds the other man looking elsewhere. His eyes shifted to the other man's hands and saw the strength of his grip. Ainosuke had clenched his hands so forcefully that it was enough to make Take think that he was ready to throw his hands at him. Rather than be wary, Take only smiled softly. Ainosuke tried to help make the hotpot. His disdain for what he thought was Tadashi's plus one cannot be hidden. He purposely bumped his shoulder against him to force him to scoot away from Tadashi. Ainosuke believed he had more tolerance to bullshit than this. But alas, he hated Take with a passion. The possessiveness over his boyfriend made it difficult for him to hold himself back. He glared at Take, intimidating him using his alpha aura.

Intimidation was common to alphas. The more pure the alpha blood is, the denser the intimidating aura is. However, despite coming from one of the purest alpha lineages, Ainosuke does not use it. He was not even aware he was using it. Take who was the recipient of this felt uncomfortable. Finally he understood what Natsuno was talking about when he said Ainosuke was scary. To his mind, there was no mistake about it. Ainosuke was attached. In fact, deeply attached to Tadashi that Take isn't sure if this attachment has a deeper meaning. He was an alpha himself, but he is bereft of territorial tendencies over someone. He had never experienced it, even though it was supposed to be common for their gender. Somehow he is jealous how Ainosuke can wear his heart on his sleeves.

Ainosuke was surprisingly adept at cooking. It was not something that Tadashi could have expected. His green eyes sparkled, and he pressed his lips in anticipation of what Ainosuke would do next, completely forgetting they were not alone. Ainosuke smiles softly at his lover.

Once the hotpot finished, they started preparing to bring it to the small table in the living room.

In the middle of preparation, Take's phone rang. He was talking for a long time on the phone. In the end, he had to leave for an emergency. When Take was gone. Ainosuke and Tadashi were finallyleft all alone. Everything got awkward all of a sudden. They usually spent time alone together, but this time it was different. Ainosuke was at Tadashi's home for the second time. It felt too intimate a situation, but it fits their current relationship status.

Tadashi tried to not think about anything too much. It can't be helped. Being alone with Ainosuke like this, after everything that has happened, makes him feel a whirlwind of emotions. Excitement, anxiety, happiness. It was a mix of these things. On the other hand, for Ainosuke, it was just happiness and satisfaction. There was also excitement there. Being in this space made Ainosule finally fit into something. He had always thought that he didn't belong anywhere. Now, he was sure that to be by Tadashi's side was where he truly belonged. He couldn't be any happier than that.

He was truly satisfied and happy. Finally, he was with him. His old pain still exists. Maybe it would never be erased. Maybe he'll carry it forever. But his longing finally eased. That was enough.

Ainosuke steals a glance at Tadashi and notices how red the other man's ears were. He smiled and played with the soft flesh of Tadashi's ears. The touch made Tadashi raise his eyes coyly. Caught red-handed, he shyly presses his lips together.

"Puppy. You say I'm cute but aren't you the real cutie here?"

Ainosuke paused, his expression darkening. He added, "Does he always cling to you like that?"

"Eh? Don't mind him. He's always like that."

Ainosuke pouts. When Tadashi saw the pout, he kissed him on the cheek.

"Don't sulk. He's a bit mischievous, but overall he respects my boundaries.

"Now that Take is gone, we can enjoy each other's company." Tadashi trails off.

Ainosuke blushes as he feels a brush of a finger and then another. All the heat in his body went to his face as Tadashi held his hand under the table. Tadashi flashes him a sweet smile.

After planting another kiss on Ainosuke's cheeck, Tadashi went to get them both a zabuton. He was about to stand up to turn the TV on when he felt a tug. Ainosuke pulled him down to sit beside him. The tug caught him offguard that he lost his balance. He was expecting to fall. Rather than fall, however, he landed against the precipice of Ainosuke’s mouth. The soft peck on his lips made him feel shy. Kissing someone like this was something new to him. His first urge was to push him away. Like he always does when getting a surprise kiss like this. It was on instinct; something he didn’t manage to completely get rid of, no matter how much he was forced to forego it. But the urge was softened by the warmth the kiss gave him. Ultimately, Tadashi succumbed to its hypnosis and kissed Ainosuke back obediently.

It was scary how the feeling of bliss can eradicate all human defenses and make one completely vulnerable. The feeling was not tainted with any unnecessary feelings like guilt or doubt. This time, Tadashi was completely at peace. The kiss felt right as it felt good.

Ainosuke didn't know what came over him when he kissed Tadashi. What they've done earlier that day should have been enough, and yet the truth was he wanted more. While they flirted until he fell as sleep, it was not enough. Ainosuke still didn’t get the cuddle he wanted. Feeling a bit childish and needy, Ainosuke withdraws and tries to hide the red painted over his cheeks. Tadashi looked at him with an expression softer than he had ever given him; softer even compared to how he looked at him before when they were younger. The older man leans in and kisses him on the forehead. He hugs Ainosuke tightly and says, "I love you, Ainosuke-sama." "I love you very much."

---

End notes:

It's been a long long time since I last updated! Something came up that I decided to be inactive for a while. I initially planned to consistently update since most of the chapters are already written but sometimes the trajectory of a fic suprisingly changes to an extent that it gets a life of its own. The fic becomes an entirely different animal. haha. I had a lot of doubts especially concerning my OC Take. The truth is, I'm quite attached to this guy, and want to write more of him. He is a bit annoying now since he's sorta a third wheel but he's cute and a true friend to Tadashi. Why am I even talking about him here? XD I want to focus more on TadaAi but Take will keep appearing from now on. This thought keeps bugging me since the beginning so I'm letting this out now.

A lot of things happened. This is actually not related to this fic, but I'm really happy that the athlete I admire finally went pro and is free from the pain and suffering ISU and his federation caused him. I feel like I can also move forward with strong feelings. XD

The editing of this chapter might be a bit messy and the fic itself and its chapters may have a lot of flaws, but I hope somehow it made you enjoy it as much as I enjoyed writing it.

Ayee, I really love tadaai, and I hope to make more fics and art for them in the future!

#tadaai #fics #tadashi kikuchi #ainosuke shindo #sk8 the infinity

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hollyhomburg · 3 years

Text

Before I Leave You (Pt.4)

(Omegaverse au, Mafia au, Bts x Reader)

Summary: Yoongi makes his choice, so does Moonbyul.

Pairing: Beta! Yoongi, Omega! Reader, Omega! Jungkook, Omega! Seokjin, Alpha! Namjoon, Alpha! Hoseok, Alpha! Taehyung, Alpha! Jimin,

Tags: Graphic material, Death, Murder, Dead bodies and dying described in detail, brief suicide attempt, suicidal thoughts, depression, DARK THEMES, guilt, blood, a touch of blood kink? drugs, murder/crime themes, guilt, kinda fuck or die vibes? finally fluff at the end, mating marks,

W/c: 7.1k

A/n: here is the moment you’ve all been waiting for! the big d word moment!!! my carpal tunnel is acting up, I will probably not be able to get the next chapter out for a few days or until next week. Chronologically the next chapter continues after part 1.

(PLEASE READ TAGS FOR CW BEFORE YOU PROCEED)

Previous part — Masterlist

Part 4: If I Have You

Pulling the trigger is the easiest thing you’ve ever done.

Geumjae’s body flinches back from the force of the bullet. The ceiling splattering with the spray of his blood. It hits the side of your face too, your white shirt crested with red at the shoulders, dripping down your throat along with the blood from your mating bite. It’s a percussive splatter, noisy as it hits the wall.

People never talk about how blood gets everywhere during a murder. Yoongi is unable to stop his flinch when Geumjae’s brain matter and viscera splatter against him, just a little.

Yoongi didn't think you'd actually do it.

He watches you shove the body away from you, hard, what's left of his head, an empty vessel, hitting the floor with a hollow thud. His hands leave you for the last time, but the pain isn't finished.

Yoongi barely has the forethought to lunge forward, knees scraping, wrestling the gun out of your hand before you can turn it on yourself. The barrel of the gun is hot when Yoongi's hands close around it and yank it away from your own temple. The smell of burning skin joins the metallic scent of murder. Your scent is a mess- it’s barely had a chance to mix with Geumjae’s burning wood-burning bread and wrath, rainstorms, and gunpowder.

He shouts your name but you don't respond.

Yoongi yanks the gun from your hands, probably hurting your fingers but panicked when he hurls the gun to the other side of the room and takes your hands in his, wrestling with you and screaming your name until the fight goes out of you.

You’re hyperventilating when you stop struggling. Both of your wrists pinned above your head in both of Yoongi’s hands, his knees pressing your legs to stillness in a way that could be sexual but isn't- it's the easiest way for him to restrain you- both sprawled on the bloody floor. Yoongi’s crying, tears dripping down his nose, every other drop shines pink from what's on his face.

“Yoongi please- please just let me go- I don’t want to become a ghost- I don't wanna become a walking corpse.” The way you look breaks his heart, your neck so bruised and bloody, your face swelling too from Geumjae’s hits. The way your eyes hold only darkness and no warmth as you look at him and beg- beg him to let you take your life. Your pupils are so small he can't see them at all.

“Let me die Yoongi- please just- if you do one thing for me- let do this. let me go."

Yoongi looks at your mating mark and can already see the thin tracery of ink spreading under your skin- inky blackness spreading from your mating bite and up your throat. A piece of someone who’s dead inside of you, shot through with silver to make it stand out more.

It’s like some silly zombie bite in a bad horror movie but it’s so much more haunting, The veins in your eyes are even starting to discolor. You have maybe a few minutes before the mating bite takes you over completely and you’re mated to someone dead.

Zombie movies were nothing more than fear of this taking root in common culture, everyone fears losing their mate. What else is more terrifying than something that takes your humanity in the way that this has taken yours. This is every person’s worst nightmare- a death sentence.

‘Ghosts’ are what society has dubbed the women and men who live after losing their partners. Most of the time they live without alpha or a pack- unable to bond to anyone else ever again once their mates are dead. Mating bites are a one-time thing.

When one-half of a mated pair dies- a person's body has a peculiar way of letting outsiders know how to treat them gently- The mating mark turns black like a brand. A mark to let everyone know that they would never have another person to take care of them- to love them.

But you aren’t alone- you’re not alone because you have Yoongi and he’s right here with his wide palms on you. Hands that where always made to fix things, but you aren’t just some broken toy that needs a bit of glue. He’s too late, just seconds too late and only inches away.

He grips both of your forearms in either of his palms hands, pulling you closer. Making you sit up, dragging you into his lap like carrying your weight in his arms will fix this. Anything to hold onto you- to not lose you too soon.

"Stop- just stop, I've got you- I've got you," Yoongi repeats it more for himself than he does for you.

But there are wounds in your body that can’t be fixed by simple hoping. There is a limit to what one person can take. Despair is one hell of a drug and while Yoongi fights and fights there is no undoing what Geumjae has done to you.

But maybe…

Yoongi dares to hope; “It’s only a half bond if we-“ he falls silent as the idea settles over him like a bucket of cold water. His brain rushing over everything he’s ever learned about mating bites and beta’s; all of the statistics and articles that Namjoon had shoved down his throat when Jungkook had first stopped having seizures.

The medical mystery that betas were; how they were able to heal unseen hurts and maybe- maybe this was like that. Maybe the solution to this problem lays in Yoongi’s veins, in his mouth.

His jaw aches at the very suggestion of it. “I’m a beta- and betas don’t usually mark- because- because they’re stronger than alpha and omega bites.”

It’s the only truth that makes sense. All of the stories of omegas and alphas going crazy after being bitten by betas, not being able to move from them too far, extreme clinginess- a bond that was too close, too strong, stronger than anything else in their life. You weren’t supposed to bond with someone so deep, the bite almost seemed to do more harm than good.

But you’re already dying and there isn’t much worse that could happen to you.

You don't have anything to lose but Yoongi does. You shake yourself free from his arms and pull back. Recoiling from what he’s offering to do for you; tether him to you forever when you might not make it.

You can already feel the mating mark taking hold- It's already starting to cloud your judgment, deep down, the part of you that cares if you survive this is already winking out. The blankness sinking through your every inch, The emptiness. You’d be surprised if you lifted your hand to your chest and found your heart still beating.

“Yoongi- No- you don’t have to- you’ve already got a pack and don’t- don’t bind yourself to someone like me.”

It’s the same argument that you had before but there’s no force behind it- every stupid excuse you had for him not to love you is moot now that your husband is dead next to you. But you're done; Every breath takes more effort than it should and you feel so heavy. You look down at your lap and feel the lethargy sinking beneath your bones like lead. Hidden hands gripping around your throat cutting off your words.

You feel like you’re choking on something.

You’ve felt depressed before (how could you not have given what your life was like before Yoongi). And having a mating mark from someone deceased feels like that but worse, like it's turned up by a factor of three. A weird mixture of dizzy, absent, and dissociative. You have never felt less connected to your own body, it feels foreign.

You are nothing but a soul inside a body, craving release. A thread of black that wants to tug you down to where ever Geumjae is now.

The sinking sadness says to you with gentle hands- this is a fine spot. You can just sit here, It’s okay. You don’t have to move, you can just sit here until you die. As long as no one bothers you and hurts you again, you could just sit here, as long as it was quiet and peaceful. Things don't even have to be good, you don't need good things, you just need it to not hurt anymore. Until the earth reclaims you like it takes abandoned buildings.

A sharp pain that goes through your heart, an ache so deep that it speaks to cavernous places, wakes monsters that you didn’t know where there.

You’ve never really wanted to die before, maybe as a passing thought- but didn’t everyone think that way? it’s so different now- where the thoughts are all consuming, running over your words in your head like oil spreading and staining cloth.

Die- want to die- want- want- want die- wanna go- wanna be quiet- wanna fall asleep and not wake up- want to-

But if you decided to lay here and not get up again, Yoongi would stay too.

He would try and get you to move, probably beg and try to get you to live. Even if he never bit you, he’d stay next to you until the end, just to hold your hand so that you didn’t have to be completely alone. You thought dying would feel more lonely, But maybe it doesn't feel that way because Yoongi’s here.

His hand closes around yours, his thumb rubbing soothing circles as he cries. And you think if you want one thing; it's for him to stop crying. Out of all people- Yoongi doesn't deserve the hurt (but maybe you're biased because you love him).

That tips the scale in his favor.

Geumjae’s blood is pooling on the floor. His body gives a twitch, the last remnants of his misfiring nerves as he dies. You feel the painful jerk in your mating bond. Yoongi watches the muscles of your neck twitch.

Neither you nor Yoongi pays him any mind.

"You don't have to do this Yoongi." Yoongi’s hand on your cheek- is like a balm to those words, pushing them out of your head. “You can’t take it back. If I die- you could die too.”

“But I want to” he kisses your cheek- and the contact lights a flame down your neck to your touch starved heart. The heat flares to light and the next second your body and your mouth are aching to bite. Your instincts an avalanche around you begging you to complete the bond that’s tearing through you making you shake. He kisses a little closer to your lips, cheeks wet and cool against your skin.

Geumaje and Yoongi were related by blood at all, maybe your instincts can’t tell the difference.

“I don’t care if it does- I can’t- I’m not going to just let you die” his voice breaks on the last word. Not when it was me who was too slow to save you; He won’t say the words or whisper his guilt into the open air.

“Please sweetheart- let me.” He kisses your lips. So soft- achingly soft, Your first kiss, you wish it had happened under better circumstances.

You hate that the first kiss you and Yoongi share tastes like blood.

But there would be more- there could be more kisses if Yoongi manages to do what he’s saying he can. The mark on your shoulder is already healing, the blackness stretching to scar treacherously fast. Normal mating bites usually take a day or so to heal, but not yours, it’s already scabbing and sealing in the poision.

If you’re going to try this- if it’s going to work- it has to be now. The bond is advancing, regardless of the fact that Geumjae is barely dead, barely cooling beside the two of you.

It’s barely been 10 minutes since you shot him. And if you listen carefully- you can hear sounds in the rest of the house, maybe someone else from the gang here- about to come upstairs and discover the mess of you three. muffled voices and heavy footsteps grow louder by the second.

Yoongi is safe but you’re not. “Yoongi,” you say, his name a broken hymn on your mouth. Musical- and Yoongi can’t think of a time when he wouldn’t want to hear it. Hoping for more of this closeness and maybe one day, a love that doesn’t hurt.

You get the feeling that even if you are broken beyond repair, this man could fix you. Wide hands and careful fingers that rub the blood away from your skin, hands made for making things and mending things when they break. And maybe you’re selfish enough to let him bind himself to you- broken as you are.

You press your forehead to his, you have to ask one more time. "Are you sure Yoongi?"

He nods, quick and small, "I'm sure." there isn’t anything in his eyes that makes you doubt him.

"Okay," you say softly, tugging him closer, tilting your chin up to the sky, your skin stings where it stretches around the mating mark. "okay. Come here then."

Your hands tangle in Yoongi’s hair as you guide his mouth to your throat, and his mouth sliding into the space where Geumjae was just minutes ago. He lingers for just half a breath before sinks his teeth over the mating mark, a little deeper- his mouth a little wider. He makes the bite a tiny bit offset.

Your breath hitches, back arching. His hands-on your waist go hard, holding you closer to him, as close as he can get you. Unlike before when Geumjae’s bite was agony, this feels like heroin- like every drug mixing together sending you up and up.

If you looked down and saw your hands were tipped in gold you wouldn’t be surprised. For a second you think you can taste colors, and then the chocolate sea salt of Yoongi settles over your tongue delicious, like ambrosia- fuck it’s so strong, it’s halfway between a headache and a high. You gasp when you feel it, feel Yoongi all over, Goosebumps rising on your arms as he touches you. The smell of ocean breeze and chocolate filling you in a way that Geumjae’s scent didn’t.

Geumjae’s bite was nothing compared to this, a whisper to a symphony.

This must be what a mating bite feels like when you want it. You cry out. Gripping the lapels of his coat. Yoongi’s heartbeat thunders in your ears, the only thing you can hear, until the beat matches to your own, heartbeats pumping in sync.

Your blood tastes sweet and he wonders what it says about him that he likes the taste. He gulps at it- once- twice- and then a third time just to make sure the mark sticks, maybe he could suck a little bit of Geumjae out of you.

His kisses get feverish, lapping up your blood with wide laves of his tongue, moaning a little. and this time when you kiss- with your blood in his mouth, they get hurried and rushed like he can consume you, each one sweeter than the last. There is one moment of nausea, only one moment where Yoongi sees the black tracery receded and feels it dim.

Maybe it’s not gone, but at least it's buried.

Yoongi can almost feel you, can almost feel the bond, but not yet. Your scent, it's all cake-sweet now. You kiss him until your jaw aches until your lips feel bruised. Until you know the sounds below actually are people, rushing around trying to find Geumjae. Calling out your names.

Yoongi is the first to break apart, the room spinning. “Do me” he lifts the edge of his shirt, picking out a spot that he likes, the meat just above his hip. A spot is half-hidden by his shirt and his pants.

Not everyone likes to have their mating marks on their neck (you certainly would have chosen to have yours another place had you been given the chance). And Yoongi stretches out so that you can get your mouth on him, your mouth on the spot he wants to bind your soul to his.

He holds one of your hands in both of his hands so gently as you cup his hip and bite down, even as you begin to make out the noise of gang members coming up the attic stairs. Yoongi bites down a moan, lets you take one gasp of blood into your mouth before your teeth leave his skin.

The high rushes over him and he knows his pupils are mirrors of yours, black and dilated. He just has time to wipe his blood from your mouth and get you as close as he can, before the attic door creaks, the barrel of a gun pushing it open. And the gangsters enter the room with practiced steps.

Yoongi pulls his shirt back down just before they have a chance to see.

You play the part, slumping against him and letting him take the reigns. the people must take it for pain even though you’re shaking not with sobs, but from the feeling of Yoongi’s soul intertwining with yours. Full body shivers and something solidifying between the two of you.

Together you shake, Yoongi is barely aware of the gangsters clearing the room.

You feel like you can taste his thoughts, though you can’t actually hear what he's thinking. You can feel the way they tumble like small waves over each other. You feel concern and something else, something that feels an offal lot like love shoot down the fledgling bond as Yoongi’s arms pull you up, firmer against him.

It makes shivers rise on every inch of your skin, the pleasure he feels when he touches you that you're now hyper-aware of. It's what your body has been craving- the completion of the bond.

You both bleed- your blood dripping onto the floor. One part sacrament and sacred love and another part poisonous longing for a man you hated so much more than you ever loved him. This feels strange, it feels wrong, and that you have one part of you reaching out for something that’s not there. And then this- with Yoongi, right and front of you and inside of you. Completely occupying your heart and your mind and your body.

Accept for that one poisoned inch; you might not be completely his, but it's enough now, the bond with yoongi occupying those thoughts you'd had minutes before.

The gangsters don’t touch Geumjae, at least until Moonbyul enters the room, unarmed. Yoongi’s cousin eyes Yoongi from the door. There isn’t enough room in this torture room for the 12 or so gangsters and the three of you, they press against the walls, guns at the ready.

Moonbyul approaches Geumjae’s corpse, turning him over with her foot to see his blankly staring face, turning it towards the heavens instead of hell. For a moment, Yoongi thinks she might actually kick him. She plucks her pink handgun from the floor. Someone passes her a rag and she wipes it free of blood and fingerprints.

Her eyes on Yoongi are hard; a bit of mirth playing on the edge of her mouth as she plays her hand. A queen in a room full of pawns and knights, and the king underfoot. Her hand of aces.

Betting it all on a simple game of roulette- red or black- will Yoongi challenge her or not. Yoongi doesn't miss the way her finger hovers on the trigger.

“I suppose this entire situation would be concerning to me- if you hadn’t already named me as Don.” she nudges Geumjae's body again with her foot. "I guess he didn't take it well?"

She lies effortlessly, taking the moment to seize power. So this was what she was waiting for. Yoongi doesn’t challenge her words for fear of what she might do right now, not that he really would anyway.

Yoongi tips his head forward in difference, “No he didn’t,”

Moonbyul tucks her gun back into her waistband, and holds out her hand to pull yoongi to his feet.

Yoongi takes you with him, small and still a little high in his arms. You hide your face in Yoongi’s shoulder, Holding onto him tight. You don’t know if you could take it if they tried to separate you now.

Yoongi has to swallow to continue, struggling to think before he speaks with so many new sensations shocking his body. He's intimately aware of the way you shift in his arms, arms tightening around you at the very idea of you moving more than an inch away from him right now as you settle onto your own two feet. still a little unsteady.

“He- he mated her against her will, and then he tried to kill us when I told him I wouldn’t- and- and after-” It’s not a lie- not really, but it still feels that way. Moonbyul doesn't need to do anything more than that to nod to call her men off, and they all relax around the room.

They instantly fade from engaged concern to understanding. The other heads of household will probably grill Yoongi more. But you’ve both got time to get your story straight. For now, they need to clean up the body.

It helps that threatening the beta is a punishable offense; no one will question Yoongi killing him- especially since they’re brothers. Most of the families tend to think that inner house spats that family's business. Yoongi doesn’t know which of his relatives will inherit the title of head of the Min family, but it won't be Yoongi.

You’re small and silent in Yoongi’s arms, so vulnerable, he keeps you a few paces away from any of the mobsters, bites down a growl whenever any of them come too close to his mate. It’s just the mating bond making it’s self-known. You are his. No one can touch you.

Yoongi has never been a possessive man, but now he is. The mating mark tearing through him and screaming at him to protect, to provide, to nurture, and keep safe. He strokes down your back as his cousin quietly orders the others to clean up the mess and Geumjae’s body. The family has cleanup crews on call for this very reason.

They quietly offer to burn the house down to stage the death but Yoongi doesn’t care. He guesses it belongs to him now or maybe you. It depends on which bond the family will consider more important; the bonds of a half mating or the bond of brotherhood.

“I’ll handle it-“ his cousin has the good grace to offer comfort to Yoongi that way when he gets you into her car. she doesn't say anything about the dents in the side.

Yoongi doesn’t quite hate her for any of this, but he doesn’t trust her the same way he did before either. She’s gotten what she wanted- the Don position. Plucked it from Yoongi’s hands.

“You haven’t had a chance to call the heads of house and tell them about your decision yet, but after that, you should be free to go” she reads him easily as always, The only other manipulator up to par with Yoongi himself in the gang. She knows that not an inch of Yoongi wants to stay in this house or this city a second longer.

At the idea of leaving you to straighten up in Yoongi’s lap to listen in a little more, you share a look with Yoongi. Your mate, your body sings the eye contact makes you shiver in your seat. Yoongi pulls you closer, stroking up to your arm mistakenly thinking you’re cold. You pull yourself closer to him- but it feels like you can’t get close enough, He makes a dissatisfied noise in his throat.

Yoongi will have to get used to this feeling. Like his soul is walking outside of his body. It feels incredibly vulnerable and intimate- He can feel your panic, how physically you’re being torn apart right now, every few minutes you shake. Yoongi puts your legs over his and holds you close. Watching your face closely for every twinge of pain as the lights of the city flicker over you two.

The meeting with the heads of house is tense, though the usual group of is two short now, standing only at eleven members now that Geumjae is gone and Moonbyul is named Don. You cannot be Don and a head of house at the same time.

It takes every bone in Yoongi’s body to let you be taken into the other room by Moonbyul’s mate to check over your injuries. He stops her with a hand on her shoulder. He catches Moonbyul’s nostrils flare, but she doesn’t say anything. “Would you look at her bruises for me?”

Later Yoongi will check them himself, again and again until he's sure you're all right. But the sooner you get ice on the nastier bruises the better off you’ll be. Someone should look at your ribs and your head too- he has half a mind to take you to the hospital before you leave the city. He doesn’t know how long it will be before you’re stationary again. He’d stay in the city tonight if you needed to. But he can feel your panic down the bond, The sooner you both get out of here the better.

With Geumjae dead there is no true opposition against his cousin's rule. She stands at the head of the table like she’s meant to be there. And still- the heads of the families talk through the night, kicking the non-proverbial dead horse into the ground. There is little mourning for Geumjae, one granny who cries faintly in the other room while the heads argue. Yoongi supposes he should look more upset, but no one pays attention to him now that he’s made his choice.

No, what they spend most of the time discuss is you. Sat in the other room, able to hear all of this, the men and woman weighing your fate and deciding what to do with you. If Yoongi listens, he can hear Hyejin’s quiet voice. Can feel your discomfort as the ice hits your ribs, maybe broken, definitely badly bruised.

Yoongi flinches every time he feels the pain pulse down the bond. Maybe in time, it will feel less sensitive but right now- Yoongi can feel your hurts just as bad as he can feel his own. A part of him is reaching out into the other room, screaming in his ear to go comfort his mate.

He has a mate. Yoongi can scarcely believe it.

The gangsters around the table remain blissfully unaware of that fact. Most of the heads are on the same page, and he won’t reveal his mating mark unless he absolutely needs to, he will let that secret stay secret unless necessary. It’s a good bargaining chip. They wouldn’t kill you if they knew it was going to kill him too. But still- it’s hard to hear them argue over your fate when he can’t intervene.

“You know the rules- no divorces and no separations,” one alpha says, he’s older- nearing 60, but Yoongi can’t excuse that cruelty with age. The youngest, the head of the Ahn house does the rebutting for Yoongi, and he bites his tongue.

“But it wouldn’t be a divorce; she’s his widow now and his ex-mate technically.”

“Yes but that’s only a half bond.” There is only one omega head, and the woman snubs her long cigarette out on the table leaving an ashy circle

“It’s only the alpha bite that matters- or have you forgotten?”

To her credit, the omega doesn't back down. “Chances are she’ll die anyway why are we even talking about her, we should start transitioning already.”

“That’s easy to say- if she’s got nothing left to lose what’s to stop her from going to the police.”

“I can keep an eye on her,” Yoongi volunteers, jumping at the chance to turn the discussion to his favor. They can all go fuck themselves if they ever dare to try and hurt you. “You say she’s as good as dead anyway. So you shouldn't mind if she comes with me.”

The likelihood of anyone living after their mate dies is in the teens. Yoongi knew that and even then he bonded to you anyway. He can only hope that with his bite coursing through your veins and your body confused that you’ve got better odds than that. Yoongi did what he promised to do, now your odds are both 50/50. “I’ll make sure she doesn’t go to the police.”

Through the bond he can feel your curiosity and a little bit of fear too, you’re listening in. And he does his best to let his calmness comfort you too. Your panic instantly relaxes and he senses you reaching out. If you were next to Yoongi you’d be holding hands, and it kind of feels that way. If you could ever hold hands with someone’s soul.

“You realize that if you make her your responsibility, anything bad that happens will fall on your head as well” their betas might be sacred- but they aren’t free from the rest of the laws of the gang.

“I understand.” The Don lifts her head, regarding Yoongi with a heavy look. “She’s his widow and whether we want to address it now or not, the law says she’s inherited his wealth.”

It's met with immediate opposition, several heads of house start speaking over each other at once, but Yoongi speaks up again, shouting over them. A beta raising their voice is about as strange as one giving or getting a mating bite, everyone falls silent. “Give it to me or her- I don’t care.”

another few minutes and they’re ready to let you go. they vote on it, and only 3 out of 11 heads vote to have you killed. Moonbyul gives the all clear, “Then you’re free to go.” Yoongi doesn’t even say goodbye, going to you in the other room just as quickly as he can without outright running. The Don’s mate is crouched in front of where you sit. Your body is mostly clean of blood and you’ve been put in other clothes; a pair of sweats and a baggy shirt.

Yoongi can see all the bruises on the side of your face turning purple and Yoongi wants to cup your face and bring it to his, kiss away the pain coloring your skin like watercolors, but can’t do it here. “Do we need to go to the hospital?”

“Not for her but maybe for you, no ones checked you over yet, have they?”

yoongi grits his teeth, seconds away from snapping at hyejin, he wants her to get away, get as far from you as possible. “i asked if she needed the hospital.”

Hyejin stands when Yoongi crouches. shaking her head when it becomes clear yoongi isn’t to be argued with right now. “There’s something wrong with her- but I think you know what” her eyes hover on Yoongi’s hip.

So at least she’s figured it out. She has the good sense to utter the words quietly. Though the people in the other room aren’t concerned with Yoongi anymore, they’ve already launched into discussions about transitioning power and re-defining responsibilities. It seems Moonbyul had a plan on how she wanted the family to run from the beginning.

He shakes off his annoyance, “Thank you,” he says to the omega, holding out a hand to you, which you take, still not saying anything. Tiredness holding you down to the chair. The same kind of look you’d had when Geumjae had died. The mating mark has been taped over but some of the blackness is still there. Yoongi wonders when it will fade, if it ever does.

“I wish I could say I’ll see you soon but I don’t think I will.” You and Yoongi nod, your hands twined between the two of you. She knows that neither you nor Yoongi has a love for the gang. No one stops you and Yoongi when you leave the house. Immediately hailing a taxi. You stop only at Yoongi’s safe house for a spare 20 minutes, while he packs up a fraction of his belongings in a hurried rush, anything to get out before someone tries to change their mind.

If Geumjae had any hidden loyalists the beta that killed him and his runaway wife would be the first targets. Let alone their reaction if they knew who had really killed Geumjae. The quicker the two of you get away from the city the better.

You end up at the train station, Yoongi breaks the bracelets off of your wrist- the same ones that he saw you wear on you the first night- and the ones that he’s always thought looked like shackles. He yanks at them as hard as he can until they snap; kissing your wrist after each one is off. You throw them over the side of the chain-link fence and into the darkness- to be lost forever you hope. The symbols of all you’ve lost.

When you get on the train, you cuddle close under Yoongi’s jacket and into his warmth. He’s a protective barrier between you and the third seat that thankfully remains empty this late into the night it’s so late it’s nearly early morning. Most of the train is empty besides an elderly couple at the front. Regardless, the two of you sit behind them. Yoongi can’t take his eyes off of the potential threat. Actually flinches when the conductor comes around to stamp your tickets.

You head off into the night- your little box of light in a sea of street lamps and hidden dangers. You almost fall asleep a few times, head bobbing as you catching yourself before it hits his shoulder. After the third time this happens he pulls you in close, tucks your head close to his scent gland, and commands “sleep” in a voice that you cannot disobey.

Eventually, you wake, the car is bright with the midday sun and the car is half full. Yoongi’s eyes are bloodshot as they train on every passenger who comes in and leaves your train car. Yoongi holds your hand, rubbing his thumb up and down the back in an endless trail. A conductor opens the door of your train car to pass through, bunching a few tickets here and there from the new passengers who have boarded the train.

He passes by where you're bundled and Yoongi flinches so hard it wakes you fully. his shoulder accidentally nudging a bruise on your cheek, He murmurs his apologies, panicked hands fussing over you. He could feel that he hit one of your bruises and the horror of hurting you make him wide-eyed and worried. You catch his hands, pressing the pads of them to your lips. Yoongi's hands shake as they touch you, hours later, he's still high on adrenaline.

“You need to sleep Yoongi” it’s been a long few days for both of you.

He doesn’t answer with more than a grunt. But you get off the train at the next stop and it’s nearing noon by the time the two of you stumble across the street to a motel, and it’s shitty and smells like cigarettes and the lady at the front desk asks if you need the hourly rate or the daily rate. Though she does give you a discount because Yoongi’s a beta. Eyeing the blood-soaked collar of his jacket and the bloody bandages on your neck.

You should be holed up somewhere safe away from prying eyes to adjust to your new mating bite- not in a hotel where the smells of other people assault your nose. Making you press close to Yoongi because everything smells so new and scary. Like your senses have been turned up and only Yoongi can quell their sensitivity.

you don’t realize that the attendant gave you two beds until you get to the room. you both stare blankly before you cough and separated. the closeness too much now that you’re alone and free from threats. Though it doesn't feel that way.

you hate it- you don’t want to curl up across the room from Yoongi- you want to be next to him. you almost whimper when he He steps away to the other bed to set down his backpack. You want to cry, your skin feels irritated and itchy without his pressed to yours. You want him to touch you but you can’t stay it. Don’t know how to ask around the thickness in your throat.

He gets a clean shirt from his black backpack and helps you put it on so that you don’t irritate the mating bite. You can’t lift either of your arms much and neither can he but he pushes through the pain for you. He only has 2 or three sets of clothes that he grabbed from the cottage, and it’s all you’ve got.

“We’ll get some more clothes for you tomorrow.” He doesn’t say that you should have grabbed some of your clothes- because you both know you couldn’t handle staying in that house a second more than was necessary. You barely thought to linger long enough to grab your purse, which thankfully had everything you really need in it.

Somehow he has athletic tape in his bag, and he spends a few minutes changing out your soaked through bandages, bundling up toilet paper, and taping it over your mating bite. Only after yours is taken care of does he let you do the same for his bite on his hip, and the burns on his hands.

You pull his pants off and then his boxers down just enough so that you can get at it, small from your mouth, the skin around it irritated and pink. You try not to let your eyes hover on the small happy trail that traces from his belly button downwards. The band on his boxers is stained with blood- and you wonder how much it hurt to have it dig into it all day.

You curl up in separate beds, and only when you’re under the covers do you slide off your pants. leaving you only in a large shirt that smells like yoongi. Yoongi does the same, says “goodnight” and shuts off the light but doesn’t turn away from you, keeping his eyes on you in the darkness.

You’re silent for a few minutes, but you can tell that neither of you is falling asleep. Your bed feels cold and you wonder if he feels the same, you let the distance hurt for a minute before you give in.

"Thank fucking god-" He peels back the blanket for you the second you make the move and dash across the cold room. you scoot into his warmth and he lets out a little ‘oof’ when you collide. Letting him pull you closer, put the blanket over your back, and make sure all of your skin is covered.

It’s not enough for Yoongi and he pulls you sideways so that he can get some of his weight on top of you. A growl building in his chest at the thought of anyone walking through the door right now.

He needs to check the lock, make sure that no one can possibly disturb you. Needs to- the instinct filling him so harshly he can’t breathe. He tries to pull away, but your hands tighten on him, and you let out a whine so heartbreaking that instantly has him releasing comforting chocolate, flopping back on top of you nuzzling under your chin, you feel like you’re drowning in it.

Your love with Yoongi is still too new and raw to be close like this without feeling shy- and yet you can’t resist, your mating bond is like a fresh burn that you can’t stop picking at because it hurts. (Like there’s something dead there that you need to get rid of, you can’t heal around, you need to tear it out so that it feels more like bleeding rather than something that was carved out by hungry heat.) You fiddle with the bandage at your neck before Yoongi takes your hand in his, lacing your fingers together.

For a moment, you crave the release that blood might give you- and like he can feel it. Yoongi presses a kiss to the back of your hand. “Couldn’t sleep?” Yoongi says. You shake your head. The motel creeks and overhead you can hear someone else moving in an adjacent room. Yoongi gets his head on your pillow and adjusts his hand around your waist so that he’s not hitting the vicious bruise that Geumjae left with one of his kicks.

The last 24 hours have been such a tangle. It feels weird to not move now. Yoongi’s heart is still hammering; you can feel it under your palm. You’re both unwilling to relax and close your eyes even for a second even though you’re both exhausted.

You’re worried if you close your eyes you’re going to see Geumjae's face.

Yoongi left the light in the bathroom on for you. Sensing that the shadows would be too thick with nightmares for you to handle for long. You look at each other in the darkness before Yoongi lets out a shaky little giggle.

“Do you know what I just realized?” he says, the words quieted against the too scratchy bedspread. “We could have gotten a better hotel, we easily have enough money for it now” and that’s true.

If Yoongi’s orders were followed and the gang's accountant really did transfer all of your inherited wealth to your name then- fuck- both of you saw the bank statements. Both of you know how much money Yoongi’s family had amassed- the same wealth that Geumjae had inherited and now you.

“Fuck you’re right,” you say, ducking in so that you don’t have to meet Yoongi’s eyes. Geumjae used to hit you sometimes if you did that- and trained habits die-hard.

yoongi kisses your brow, slow little pecks that travel down your cheeks, as unhurried as they are sweet. It's strange to be close to him now when it’s all you’ve wanted for the last few months. You never thought you’d get this. It feels like a daydream and a nightmare all at once.

“We could buy a whole house- or three” and even then you’d have more than enough money to live on after. For the rest of your days, comfortable and cozy even if you were foolish with the money. Yoongi still gets his stipend from the gang. No doubt to be greater now that he’s the only beta.

He stops his kisses, mouth hovering on your cheek, “We could do that.” he sounds like he’s barely containing his excitement.

You’ll both be fine. Neither of you will ever have to worry about money again and it makes you feel sick and happy with something that feels a terrible lot like grief.

Even if you got that- the last 24 hours haven’t been worth it. You’re not entirely out of the woods yet. The mark on your shoulder is scabbing over and inky. But every few hours of closeness that the two of you have- Yoongi think’s he sees the color fade- just a little bit.

You don’t know where the giggle comes from but one moment it comes out of your mouth and you laugh, and Yoongi joins in the sound startling out of his chest. He presses his forehead tight against yours and sighs at the sound. You see the moment clarity falls on him and an idea settles into his mind the second it hits. And dim happiness settles over your bond.

Yoongi lifts your hand to his mouth and kisses your bruised knuckles. “Let's buy a house.”

You smile- tired from today but still willing to placate him. “Okay Yoongi, we can do that.”

Now finally, his eyes are starting to droop, every few seconds he tries to keep them open, but you know he's seconds away from sleep. His words slurred when they whisper, his sweet chocolaty breath tickling your cheeks. “Goodnight sweetheart- love you.”

“Love you too,” it’s the first time you’ve ever said those words to each other. It feels like the first of many times you’ll say it. Forever- you and Yoongi will be mated together until you both die. And who cares if that happens tomorrow or months from now. Who cares? Because you have him and that’s all that matters.

Yoongi holds you and knows- that he will love you- as long as he can.

He watches you sleep, waits until your eyes are closed. Until he can make sure you’re safe and warm. A gentle purring fills the hotel room, soft and peaceful. yoongi hears it louder when he presses his ear to your chest. He tries to keep his eyes open, but somewhere around the second hour- they fall closed.

Neither of you dream.

—————

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