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delicrieux · 3 years

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—MAKE YOU SAY “OH” EXTRAS: TINDER

extra meaning non-canonical occurrence; can be placed anywhere in the “make you say oh” timeline after couple (cha. 14) and before the final “oh”.

pairing—corpse husband x f!reader warnings—tinder profiles, tw: men, swearing. word count—2.6k. format— written. ─── ❥ req by nonnie: y/n makes a youtube vid/live stream where she's just swiping through her tinder acc and corpse literally blocks her lmao

author’s note—akldsljfs this was such a funny idea i could not not write it lmao

ultimate masterlist. myso masterlist

You have pulled the biggest brain move by setting up both a facecam and a screen recorder on your phone. All is beautifully displayed and visible during the stream. Your fanbase is particularly intrigued on what exactly are you planning on doing today, seeing as your tweet of “strea” had been a bit vague, if not downright ominous. No emojis. No elaboration. You couldn’t even be bothered to finish the word. Truly, a mystery. Everyone tuned in and are currently waiting with bated breath.

A few of your fans must sense upcoming doom because the overall mood in the chat turns from optimistically intrigued to...evil. It’s an entity all on it’s own now, clawing at you through the screen with various renditions of laughter and devil emojis. A few eggplants thrown in there for good measure, accompanied, naturally, by the scandalous water drops. At first the common consensus is that you’re biting the bullet and going through your camera roll on stream. Definitely an idea worth considering, though you frankly don’t know what lies at the start of the 11k photograph journey, and you are afraid to check in public. Could be a harmless meme, could be a salacious pic you had saved of an OF star. It’s really a gamble. Either way, you would definitely get banned. You might still get banned. Why do you insist on doing shit like this?

Because it’s funny. Because you’re kinda stupid. Because it’s just so absolutely laughably easy to do.

A smile quirks your lips, and while it is not explicitly smug, the look in your eyes sure is, “Greetings,” You utter lowly, dimming the lights--the budget for this stream! Ugh, you went all out, “my children.”

mother i crave violence

sensing evil energy rn!!

i do not claim the energy in this video for myself or anyone else watching this 💖💖

^with peace and love shut the fuck up

“I know y’all lowkey hoes-” Upon your words the chat splits into two: one side eagerly agrees (even shares a few OF accounts! How helpful, supporting small businesses!), whilst the other feverishly insists on innocence. You make a face stuck somewhere between offended and bewildered, “Now c'mon now-I know you. I know you all. We’re the same, don’t-what was that?”

You try to scroll back to the comment but it’s loss in the sea of incoming messages, “I swear to God I just saw-”

Corpse_Husband: i love late night streams it’s not like i have anything better to do.

“COOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORPSE!!!!”

rip headphone users

i cant feel my face when im with you by the weeknd but instead of face its my fucking ears

yall think full vol on pc is better?my parents woke up 😭😭😭😭

To think he’s spending his last waking moments for today with watching you (he probably still would have anyway, because you do not posses an ounce of shame or self-control and pester him relentlessly)! It makes your heart sing, and suddenly, a traitorous, fun hating idea barges it’s way through the crowd of incoherent buzzing and states: don’t do this. For some reason it also has the voice of Rae. As if that would work in guilt-tripping you- Rae never succeed, and her fictitious rendition in mind won’t fare much better either.

Still, you thought about it. That must count for something. Corpse will understand, won’t he? Why don’t you want to upset it in the first place? Men look so funny when they lose their shit, like hello, don’t you have anything better to do? But the image of Corpse just sitting there, hurt, distraught, leaving you on seen because he’s in his sad boy hours leaves a sour taste in your mouth.

queen rly went from 🥺😊 to 😕 u ok bbgirl?

Corpse_Husband: no pouts cutie

akjdjoeijdfse cUTIE??? deadass boutta r.i.p.

Well that succeeded in eliminating everything from mind, doubts included. If this was an anime, the scenery would shift into something roseate, with flowers and bubbles and sparkles all around you along with a halo or two. Alas, not an anime, rather reality. The led-lights, however, seemingly possessing a will of their own, slowly turn from deep violet to pink. You smile brightly, like the absolute dumbass you are, and you are met with a ray of heart and blushing emojis. You are just so cute, a real cutie! Still in your disguise adorable state, you swipe your finger on your phone screen, the grin never leaving your lips.

There, among the plethora of apps, nestled sits a red square with a white fire plastered on it. The delicate calligraphy on the bottom reads: TINDER.

The mood changes once again- you’re giving the roaches emotional instability by how quickly everything flips over- and the chat spams eggplants vigorously; some, of course, bravely fight against the thirst.

nooooooo i thought y/n is gonna stream in a god honoring way!!!

^pack it up girl defined

“So, Charlie and I-” You note a few awfully curious comments and squint, “-yes, we talk a lot. Charlie is a really good friend of mine. We’re best friends. Brothers. Sisters. Cousins. The whole fucking family tree-no, that sounds weird. Delete. Anyway, Charlie, being the absolute fucker he is, said, hey, you know what would be funny? And I was like, nooo, what would be funny, Charlie? And he says to me, he says, says, making fun of men on Tinder. And if y’all need any more proof that Charlie and I are platonic soulmates, then dunno, my children, my roaches, I dunno-I dunno what more to give you.”

You can’t be bothered reading the comments, there’s too damn many. You also need to save your reading comprehension for the actual bios. It has a time limit, that darn thing.

“Okay, so I made a profile earlier, but I hadn’t swiped on anyone yet-” Despite the fact, Tinder helpfully informs you that already 99+ people have swiped right on you, “So, this is me,” You show the pictures you have of yourself, and damn, not to be a conceited narcissist, but you look really good. Like if you saw yourself on Tinder, you’d super like instantly. “Uhm, so, my bio-my bio says: let’s sauce in the tub together, ya dig? splishy splashy, giggle giggle.”

i cant believe we are witnessing y/n trying to form a coherent sentence live

shes trying give her time

ya dig??? y not capeesh

what scene from the godfather is this lol?

“My anthem, is,” You laugh, covering your lips with your hand, “Corpsie, this is form you-” Proudly, you show that indeed, Corpse’s E-GIRLS ARE RUINING MY FUCKING LIFE is listed as your anthem on Spotify, “Hehe.” Yes, you say that aloud.

Corpse_Husband: you’re killing me Corpse_Husband: thanks baby Corpse_Husband: now delete tinder ❤︎

You ignore his last quip, deciding it’s finally time to get this show on the road, “Right, let’s do this shit. I’m not actually going to swipe on any guys that look, uh, decent? Yuck, can’t believe I just said that, uhm, because I-because I feel like some actually deserve a chance with someone? I don’t wanna get anyone’s hopes up, as I am currently in a long distance relationship with Chrollo. So I’m just gonna swipe on, like, frat boy assholes. Because I don’t care if I hurt their feelings. Quite frankly I don’t think they possess them in the first place.”

The chat voices their agreements. With the ground rules set, you, giddy, click on the first profile.

Does Tinder know what you’re doing, your plan? The FBI agent watching you through your phone must be working overtime, bless his heart. They must, because the the first guy to meet you is named Jason, and there he is, blond hair and blue eyes, holding up a fish the size of his torso. Marginally adequate in looks, pretty good muscles. A solid 7 bordering on 8. He’s the same age as you, 15 miles away, and he studies at some college you don’t care enough to look up. Bio reads:

I like to drive fast. Fishing is my passion, but if you can’t catch me by the ocean, you’ll catch me catching waves, bro! Love a good gym date. You do squats, and I’ll keep a close eye to make sure you’re doing it correctly ;) You probably saw me at a party. Leader of the The Phi Kappa Psi. I’m a Gemini, if that matters lol.

You, of course, read it aloud, dramatically; provide some constructive criticism-he seems nice, but he’s a Gemini, so naturally, you can’t trust him at all! Also, that gym date session leaves little to be desired. With your rant done, you swipe right, and shocker! (not), it’s an instant match.

“Okie, I still wanna swipe of some profiles, so I’ll see what he’ll text later-” For a second you wonder the legalities of this stream, but you’re having too much fun to think of it further, “guys, I won't get sued, right?”

NOW she considers it

well....

if you do, we’ll kickstart your lawyer dw <3

Onto the next profile. Kevin, 25, is seen fixing his car- or, you assume he’s mid-fixing it, you don’t really know why else he’d hold a wrench and be covered in oil. He’s shirtless, and the caveman part of your brain echoes something closely resembling AWOOOGA!, but...but!...blonde hair, blue eyes. You pout again, “I don’t...I don’t really like blond boys, ya know? With the blue eyes and all, it’s just not my thing, uhm, unless it’s like-like...Armin from Attack on Titan. Else I don’t care.”

Onto the bio:

You have to treat a car like you treat a woman: go on long rides, take the lead, but most importantly, keep her oiled up 😜

“What the fuck did I just read?”

The chat is equally confused. You swipe right anyway- another match. Too easy.

The stream continues without incident for a solid thirty minutes- all of your matches, expect a few that genuinely looked like normal dudes that really couldn’t write a decent bio to save their lives, had been blond hair blue eyed gym rats with ranging forms of misogyny. Some opened with asking for nudes out right, some asked about your day first before asking for nudes. You prefer the former. Straight to the point! You admire the gall.

But then, down the forty-five minute mark a profile popped up that made you still by your phone, your smile dying as your eyes bulged. Dear God. Lord in heaven. Who is this demonspiit lookalike and why is he so fucking hot? The neck tats, the skateboard, the clothes- holy shit, you gotta close your mouth before some drool dribbles out.

No bio, just his name, Tyler, and that he’s 23.

“He boutta be 23 in me.” You mutter, swiping right with lightning speed.

WHAT DID SHE SAYYYYY?????????

tyler is y/ns karma for relentlessly mocking that one guy that had a whole ass list on what his “female” partner should be

^he deserved it and also tyler seems like a typical fuckboi y/n grow a braincell

look at mom 🥺 her eyes are sparkling

It wasn’t a match right away. You somehow expected as much, but it still upset you. Simp behavior, pathetic. The stream continued bravely, and when Tyler messaged you a simple “yo” you totally didn’t sequel. You didn’t manage to text him back on stream: texting all those guys that you didn’t really find all that attractive was easy, but this...You’re a sucker for a man who radiates red flag energy. His whole profile is a red flag. He might just be a red flag himself.

What can you do? Suddenly becoming color blind is not easy. Once the stream ends, you unmatch with everyone expect Tyler. He you chat with for a bit, but a sudden craving for different company makes you abandon him, too. You don’t feel too heartbroken for him- you’re certain there’s already too many girls in his dms. You wish them luck.

Happily, you delete Tinder. You go to Twitter, notice you’re trending again- look at you go! Queen shit- and as you compose a thank you tweet, something strange happens. You go to text Corpse, but when you click on his profile you grow cold.

YOU’RE BLOCKED. You can’t follow or see @/Corpse_Husband ‘s Tweets.

...Pardon? You hop onto Instragram and-also blocked. Seriously? And you thought you’re one petty bitch. Corpse is seriously prissy about everything. Damn, if he didn’t like your stream, he could’ve just said so. Didn’t need to, like, block you from his internet existence. So not cool.

You try texting him but no text go through. Well how will you let him know you deleted Tinder just like he asked? You relieve your frustrations by punching your pillow a few times. Later, you apologize to her, you didn’t mean to hurt her, it’s not her, it’s you. Fuck, 5 minutes of exile and you’re already loosing your mind.

“Raeeeeeeeeeeee!” You whine loudly. It’s roughly 2am now, but you don’t care. You’re too heartbroken to care. There’s a thump from her room, but nothing else, “Raeeeeeeeee!!!” You wail, wallowing in self-pity on your bed. You hear a very loud, very annoyed sigh from her room, followed by angry marching. Your door is abruptly thrown open, and in the dim, colorful light you see her scowl.

“What?” She grits.

“Can you please tell Corpse to unblock me from everything?”

“What did you do now?”

“I made fun of men on Tinder.”

She pauses, “...That doesn’t sound so bad.” She surmises, voice laced with suspicion, “What else?”

“...There was one really hot guy that I kinda sorta talked to after--”

“Y/n.”

“-But I totally deleted Tinder and honestly he was pretty boring, so, like, uhm, please?”

She sighs, the servery of which implies she is holding the weight of the world on her shoulders, and instantly you know that you won. She taps away at her phone, “You owe me one.” She states, and before you can reply, she exits your room and slams the door behind her.

Grinning, you text his phone again. The message goes through, oh gosh, you’re so relieved you feel like crying. This has been, officially, the worst five minutes of your life.

You Y DID U BLOCK ME LOSER!!! MAJOR LOSER ALERT!! I DELETED EVERYTHING IT WAS A JOKE r u still mad at me? y u always mad at me i never do anything:(

my husband You’re my baby, how do you think I’ll react when I see you publicly simping for some asshole on Tinder?

Oh no, he used the words, he delivered the killing blow. You’re finished. Your heart can’t take such a workout.

Not that you would ever admit it to him, though!

You hehe ur jellyyyy u always dis jealous hehe?

my husband Not jealous.

Yeah, you might not be the brightest tool in the shed, but even you know that’s a lie. You send him an array of kissy emojis that he doesn’t have the decency to reply to. Then, completely unprompted and dead serious, you send him a simple voice memo, saying: “You really have nothing to worry about, you know? You’re my favorite, Corpsie.”

He responds via text, reiterating that he’s not fucking jealous and that he just doesn’t like when you show such outward interest in anyone but it’s not like he cares or anything. It’s just really, like, weeeeird to see his baby simping for another man like that totally ruins the whole dynamic!!! It was only natural that he should block you on every social media platform, including his personal number (which, like, was completely necessary! Doesn’t matter that his viewers can’t see it, it’s gotta be super believable!), and inform his followers of that, because it’s all a joke, like, for the dynamic, that Youtube grind, you know? Ya dig? No personal feelings were involved at all. He totally wasn’t upset that you found someone else cute, no way!

my husband I’m not jealous. Lol.

You ik u repeated tht like 50 times u trynna convince me or??? lmao

my husband No comment. ...You don’t actually talk to anyone else like we’re talking, right?

You no one else calls me their baby if thts wat ur wondering at least not to my knowledge lol im all urs

my husband That makes me very happy to hear:)

Yeah, it makes you very happy, too.

hope you liked it!! xx

#corpse husband #corpse husband x reader #corpse #corpse x reader #corpse husband x y/n #corpse x y/n #myso #make you say oh #imagine #imagines

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gb-patch · 3 years

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Ask Answers: May 15th Part 1

It’s been longer than usual since our last answer session, so I’m answering a ton of questions today! It’s so big I split it into two parts. Thank you for the patience on getting a response to these.

Thanks for reaching out to us with your questions and kind words ^^!

Sorry if this has been asked before or isn't something you can say but is there anyway for Cove to confess in step 4? I wanted him to confess in step 3 and followed all the steps to make him do it but ended up texting my family instead of Cove at the end.

Yeah, Cove can confess in Step 4!

Hello! I heard that Cove is on the spectrum, albeit undiagnosed. As someone who is ND, this makes me UNBELIEVABLY happy. I literally was brought to tears! Thank you for that!

Out of curiosity, will Cove be diagnosed in Step 4? I have a strong feeling y’all won’t make it a HUGE deal/make it out to be negative, so I’m not worried about that whatsoever! I’m just curious just he’ll off handedly mention it? Or will it just not be touched upon at all (which is ok!)?

Either way is ok, I’m just curious!

I’m happy it made you happy! Admittedly, Cove simply being someone with autism that grew up not being diagnosed was something I included for myself. I didn’t really think anyone would notice or ask about it, aha. But players did start to have questions about his traits, so I started to talk about it outside of the game. It’s great to see it get such a positive response and now I do feel like having it be a non-topic may have been the wrong choice and bringing it up would’ve been good in terms of having positive representation for that. I don’t know if I’ll find a way to mention it in Step 4 now, with how far along the game is, but I am at least thinking about it when originally it wasn’t something I really even considered.

Hey! Just wanted to say thank you for Our Life. It's been a bright spot and a needed escape in what's otherwise been a crummy year. I know you just did a Q&A post but I figured I'd ask anyway. Was just curious about Step 4. Will it be similar to the other Steps in that it consists of several different moments or will it just be one long sequence?

Step 4 is shorter than the prior Steps because it’s just an epilogue rather than a full arc of a story. It’ll consist of scenes that all happen in a set row one after the other. There won’t be a collection of Moments to choose from. But it’ll still be very sweet and fun.

¡hola!, you see, first I want to say that I love Our Life! (°◡°♡) and I have 2 important questions, would Cove cry watching titanic? and what is the saddest part according to him? (sorry for my english)

Titanic would make him cry. He’d probably think the parts showing people who aren’t able to make it to the life boats/are choosing to stay and go down with the ship were the saddest.

Hello, I wanted to ask how much you earn with creating games? Like is it possible to make a living? Thank you >< <3

How much I earn varies a lot month to month based on Steam sales, Patreon backers, and how many projects are in full production at the time. It’s also hard to say how much I make historically, since that also changes dramatically year by year. But I do earn enough to work on these games full time! I really appreciate all the support that allows me to do that.

Hey!! I was wondering for the 18+ Our Life moment, will there be an emphasis on safety/comfort for all involved? I feel like there would be just going off of what the rest of the game is like, but I wanted to ask

Yes! Cove is a nervous boy himself and also super cautious about doing anything the MC doesn’t like, so clear consent from both is absolutely needed for anything to happen. It’s a conversational sexy times Moment with stops/starts so the two can talk about how they’re feeling, rather than a heat of the moment just going for it kind of thing.

Hey!! I was wondering how long the wedding dlc would be? Will it be broken up into moments, or just one big event?

It’s one long series of scenes all in a row rather than a collection of Moments to pick from. It’s the shortest and the least expensive of all the DLCs. It’s not super crucial to get and those who aren’t into big weddings can totally skip it without worry.

HELLO AMAZING DEVS 👋 i am hopelessly in love with the worst guy ever (jeremy king) and because of this i have a really stupid question: does he really hate people who are nice to him? TvT he’s too cute to be mean to istg it’s a miracle JB held the urge to be consistently nice to him bc just look at his FACE he is so cute! thank you for jeremy’s route it’s so lovely (and awful bc he’s scum 11/10) it gave me so much laughs LMAO i hope you guys have a good day!!

Haha, thank you. He doesn’t hate them but he’s certainly not pleased with them. Jeremy is either uncomfortable with or annoyed by people being sweet on him, depending on how they approach it. He’s far more comfortable with jerkiness. It lets him relax and he can be himself without it being a problem, since he’s also a jerk. He feels a level of guilt being such a little punk to kind people, not enough to be a better person but still.

Has Cove dated or been interested in someone other than MC?

Nope! He stays single over the course of the game if he’s not with the MC.

Is Step 4 more mature? Or it's gonna be set in similar atmosphere as Step 3?

Step 4 is a similar atmosphere as Step 3. Though, it’s actually kind of less mature-topic heavy than Step 3 since it’s just a ‘hey, let’s check in on the gang to see what they’re up to’ style epilogue rather than a story arc with serious issues.

will there be new music for now and forever?? or will the old our life music be reused?

It’s gonna be a brand new soundtrack. We’ll be opening up a job position for that soon.

Hi, is it okay if we use the assets in Our Life (like the sprites) for fanworks or fan content content, like edits?

Sure! Just as long as you don’t use the assets made by those artists to make money.

Quick clarification on Step 3 choices: I hope I didn't come off rude (because I LOVE the game, really!!), I was just curious because the intro threw me off at times. For example, you could choose how you felt about Elizabeth in Step 2 (Dinner), but during the Step 3 intro, it says that you got closer to Liz and I didn't get a choice in it.

For the example, it can’t be helped that you’re closer to Liz in Step 3 than you were in Step 2 because she’s inherently closer to the MC regardless of whether you liked her or not in Step 2. Her feelings are out of your control and the game isn’t so dramatic that you can push her affection away and not let her bond with you, haha. But ‘being closer’ can still be relative. For some people maybe that means you’re best buds now and for others it might just mean you’re not fighting all the time any more. If there’s other parts you want to mention, feel free to let us know.

Did the illustrator for Our Life change?

We have many OL artists! The main artists who set the game’s style haven’t changed, but there’s multiple other artists who help finish assets.

So Miranda's type is confident and outgoing, huh? So...does that mean Terri's her type?? 👀

Haha, sorry for the late reply on this. As you might’ve seen in our post yesterday- yeah that is her type.

Hey! First, I just want to say I've really enjoyed how detailed OL got with gender identity and sexuality and how respectful the topics were handled! It's been so wonderful to play since the experiences could be close to my own (I'd be lying if I said I didn't tear up at parts). Second, I was wondering, would future games explore the topic of polyamory? I'd love to see more visual novels allow room for that and I saw you've explored the topic before.

Keep up the amazing work! ♡

Thank you! We do want to include polyamory in at least some of our future projects. Floret Bond, which might be what you’re referring to when mentioning how we’ve explored the topic before, is on hold unfortunately. So right now I’m not sure when something might release or what will be the first game of ours to come out with poly relationships (we might do something else before FB is done). We’ll have see how things ends up coming together.

Hey um. I feel like im not allowed to ask this on the private discord cuz people will yell at me but why is there so much focus on OL2 and not finishing OL1 stuff? I like the new people but i kind of want to finish cove's story and get derek and baxter stuff first. didn't people pay for it?

I’m sorry, I don’t understand entirely what’s making that situation a concern. There’s a channel in the discord for critique where no one is allowed to comment back. People can voice things they’re worried about without any way for others to push back on it. And the two teams working on the OL games are different. We try to post pretty often about how we’re hiring brand new people to start on Our Life: Now & Forever. The OL1 team is all still working on OL1 like normal. There’s only more updates on the Patreon for OL2 because the expansions to the first game are mostly script-based at this point while OL2 is just starting to get all its art, which means there’s a lot more to show off as previews.

Also, there was a Kickstarter for the first Our Life, if that’s what you mean by people paying for it. But one of the stretch goals was to start Our Life 2 early, before fully completing Our Life 1, so that the new game could be out sooner. It wouldn’t make sense to stop doing OL2 work because that would be going against what backers were promised. Maybe you didn’t get the full story before and hopefully this clears it up!

Hello! I know it's up to every player but.. What is your recommendation for playing order? Did you ever had any timeline events planned?

I didn’t make the events with a planned timeline. The events got made simply as I had ideas for them and then I just kind of organized them from left to right on the screen in an order to space out more dramatic ones between more lighthearted ones. Any order the player wants to go with is totally valid!

Hi! It's Step 4 a paid dlc or update? And how long it's planned to be? Ps. Love the game!

The Step 4 epilogue is free! The Cove Wedding DLC does cost money, though. Those are planned to be shorter than the usual Steps/DLCs.

Will we have options for what sort of job the MC might have by the time step 4 takes place?

Yeah, you can. It’s not super exact or detailed, but there are options about it.

Is there a pandemic in Our Life world, or is it just in a better timeline with no pestilence?

Our Life is pandemic-free! That didn’t exist when we began working on the project and it’s not something we’d like to feature in this story now that it has unfortunately come along, aha.

Hi, you said that you can play tic-tac-toe or hangman with Cove in Boating if you're sick/scared but I keep getting tic-tac-toe. Am I doing something wrong?

After being sick/scared you have to continue to be upset/unwell. If you calm down and decide to just chill you’ll end up playing tic-tac-toe.

Hi, GB Patch! Since Lee was initially commissioned to only appear in two Steps does this mean she won't appear in the Wedding DLC? I really like her character so it'll be a little weird to not have our cousin at our wedding, aha.

She is gonna be in Step 4/the wedding DLC after all! We’re still working with her creator to make sure it fits with what they wanted.

Is Sunset Bird based on a real place? Asking for a friend, not trying to move there or anything. 👀

It’s based on small beach towns in So-Cal, but not one specific town you could go see in real life, I’m afraid. It’d be nice if it was real, though.

—– —– —– —–

We released a new FAQ! It answers common questions and we’ll keep adding more to it. Please check there before sending an ask. FAQ Also, if you prefer to just see the main posts without all the asks/reblogs, feel free to follow our side account instead: GB Patch Updates Blog

#our life #Our Life Beginnings & Always #Our Life: Now & Forever #ask #gb patch #gb patch games #xoxo droplets

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obeiii-mee · 4 years

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Hi there! Im back, tysm for doing my HC ;;/ it was super cute, i really liked Mammons and Satans!! If you dont mind if i ask for another? Hdjsks Recently, i slipped while walking home with some pals and scrapped my knee. It wasnt too bad, but it sure looked bad lmao If you can could you do HCs for the boys reacting to MC slipping and scrapping there knee while walking w them? Im sure Mammon would have a heart attack hfjd Tysm!! Keep up the good work♡

Thank you so much! I hope your knee gets better and that it wasn’t too painful! The brothers would all be panicking in their own way but I agree, Mammon would faint or something lmao.

Hope this was OK.

————————————

The Brothers with an MC who fell and scraped their knee:

Lucifer:

-It was a miracle you managed to convince him to come out on a walk with you at all

-The man doesn’t know when to take a break from his work

-He’s more likely to accept if it’s you asking tho, he has an obvious soft spot for you

-The others call him a suck up behind his back because of it

-You were so happy that you managed to pry Lucifer away from his desk, you were basically skipping alongside him

-Long story short, you tripped over your own two feet and fell

-Luckily, your knees and palms were the only things that got a bit scruffy

-Well, actually your right knee looked as if someone tried removing your entire knee cap with a scalpel, skin and all but adrenaline was kicking in and you couldn’t feel much

-You’ve never seen Lucifer freeze the way he did then

-His mind just drew a blank

-You were about to shrug it off and call it a day, get up and continue your walk but daddy Lucifer can’t have that

-He has six younger brothers (and a younger sister at some point) he is pretty experienced when it comes to treating injuries

-You aren’t walking for the rest of the day, let me make this clear

-He will carry you back to the House of Lamentation no matter how much you protest

-In case it wasn’t obvious already, Lucifer gives off massive dad vibes and now he’s bandaging your leg while you’re laying down on his bed

-While the rest of the brothers watch the two of you from behind the door frame because they are all equally worried

-Get ready for the three hour lecture coming your way

-He’s pissed and amused at the same time tbh

-Silly human, falling over like that and hurting themselves

-Lord Diavolo forbid you try to get out of that bed, he will drag you back and make sure you stay there until your knee is better (kinky)

Mammon:

-He was on his merry way to the casino to blow off all of Lucifer’s money and you tagged along solely for the purpose of making sure he didn’t spend all of Lucifer’s money

-You’d both be done for if he did

-But I guess fate really had it out for you on that day since your foot slipped on....something and you tripped

-Both of your knees looked bloody and damaged as hell but you were more irritated than anything

-Mammon on the other hand did a fucking double take and almost passed out

-He screeched his lungs out

-One look at your injured knees and he was ready to drag you all the way to the human realm on foot to find you a doctor

-“MC ARE YOU OK WHY THE FUCK IS THERE SO MUCH BLOO-HOLY SHIT STAY STILL DON’T MOVE! THE GREAT MAMMON WILL FIX THIS...SOMEHOW.”

-It was very dramatic, he cried

-You stood up to prove that you were alright because you thought he was going to have a seizure soon enough

-OK, that helped him calm down a little

-At least now he knew your legs weren’t about to get torn off and you weren’t on the verge of death

-Fuck the casino, you were going home

-Like Lucifer, don’t expect you will walk home by yourself

-He will carry you, a bit embarrassed by his initial freak out but still eyeing your wound, concerned

-As soon as you get home and the other brothers help you out because he’s shit at bandaging, he just sits in his own pool of misery and guilt

-Your poor knees wouldn’t be so jacked up if you hadn’t come along with him today

-He was so determined to make it up to you, he stayed by your bedside like a loyal puppy with a wagging tail (flashback to the animal event)

-Overall, he almost went into cardiac arrest and was too panicked to realise you were fine

-You thought he was smothering and overprotective before? Good luck for the rest of the week

Levi:

-“See, this is why I don’t like going out. There’s always some normie laying on the groun- OH MY LORD DIAVOLO, MC IS THAT YOU?? ARE YOU OK?”

-HIS HENRY ALMOST DIED ON THE NEWLY POLISHED FLOOR OF AN ANIME CONVENTION, HE HAS VERY MIXED EMOTIONS

-You fell knees first and hurt them quiet badly but you could stand, even if the pain made you twitch a little

-This confused Levi because you looked fine even though your knees certainly didn’t

-You told him you felt alright and it wasn’t that big of a deal and he absolutely rolled with it

-But you guys still went home after that

-He said it was because you bled all over your cosplay but that’s just him being a tsundere

-Levi is usually very shy when it comes to physical contact but he firmly insisted that he help you walk home

-I mean, he knows you said you were feeling OK and maybe humans just have a lot of tolerance for injuries like that

-But he still felt it was necessary that he took you home and checked out your injuries

-He kept the mood light while disinfecting you’re wound with some help from Satan by talking about how the convention went

-High low-key relieved seeing you walk around like normal two minutes after that

-He started bitching to you about how you made him miss his the event but he didn’t mean any of it

-“Stupid normie, making me miss my favourite Ruri-chan event. You’re lucky I love you and think you’re cute....did I just say that out loud??”

Satan:

-Oh dear, why would you go out for a walk in the middle of a rainstorm? What were you thinking?

-Actually, it was Satan’s idea

-He may be a demon and the prince of Wrath no less, but he is such a sappy, cheesy bastard at times

-He definitely thinks that walking and kissing in the rain is very romantic (bet he read something like that in an erotica)

-You know what’s not romantic blondie? Slipping on a very small puddle and potentially fracturing your leg

-It was just a scraped knee but you were frustrated enough to be extra

-He’s helping you up before you even have the chance to realise you fell in the first place

-Your knee was looking pretty bad so you guys went home just to avoid any further casualties

-He’s actually chuckling all the way back while you playfully glare at him because how dare he laugh at your misery?

-Date night was ruined but at least he got to take care of you

-He knew your knee must have hurt and he felt bad but he couldn’t help but giggle a bit to himself because your fall was so comical

-Ah but he does enjoy fussing over you for the rest of the night a bit too much

Asmo:

-You thought Mammon was melodramatic?

-Take a look at this fucking guy

-He actually screeches even louder than his brother and probably falls to his knees too (but not really because those pants were expensive)

-His screams definitely got the attention of at least 10 random passerbyers

-He’s actually on the verge of crying

-I mean, can you blame him?? Look at your beautiful knees!! They were ruined

-He felt so bad for you, he actually babied the hell out of you that day

-“Asmo, it’s fine. It’s just a scrap.”

-“A SCRAP, MC IT LOOKS LIKE YOUR KNEE IS ABOUT TO FALL OFF YOUR POOR SKIN-“

-It was just a scrap but Asmo’s secret talent is being extra as fuck

-He totally spilled all the tea to the rest of the brothers when he got home

-And then he ushered you into his room

-Funnily enough, he’s pretty good with injuries. Not as much as Satan and Lucifer but still

-He pampered you for the next few hours but that image of your skin being all grazed like that will forever haunt him

-How can you not be so bothered by it?? He’d die if he was in your place

-I love Asmo just because of how dramatic he is

Beel:

-Your shoelaces were undone and of course that meant a fun little trip to the floor of Hell’s Kitchen

-Beel didn’t notice you fell at first, he was concentrating on his food and assumed you were next to him

-But then he realised that you weren’t and for a moment he thought you disappeared or something

-Before he turned to find you laying on the floor, curled up because life was pain and you were suffering

-“Are you OK? Or are you just tired? Belphie does that a lot when he’s tired.” Or depressed one might say

-But for real, he’s good at identifying serious wounds and less serious wounds since he’s an athlete

-He can tell your knees were bleeding way more than they should have from just a simple scrap

-He slinged you over his shoulder and carried you, calmly, back home, with a burger still in his hand

-He’s actually really collective and talked to you while cleaning up your injury to take your mind off the pain

-He knows humans are a little more fragile than demons so even though he knows it’s not a big deal, he can’t help but worry

-It’s kinda hard falling around him tho because chances are, he will actually catch you even if he happens to hold something

-He’s sad if you’re sad so please don’t cry he will bandage your scraped knee do you want the last bit of his burger to make you feel better?

-Comfort hugs afterwards!

-Which is awesome because Beel gives out best hugs :)

Belphie:

-Ah yes, another beautiful day at RAD

-Walking alongside with your grumpy and sleepy boyfriend when a random demon bumps into you

-Wel not bumps, more like shoves you so hard you fall down and tear the fabric of your pants

-While the dude shrugs it off and speeds away

-You were a bit pissed off because rude

-But Belphie was fucking fuming

-He felt so offended on your part

-I mean, the nerve of him

-He was tired as shit but he wanted to chase after him and throw hands, possibly fill his pillow with rocks and hit him over the head with it

-He forced himself to focus on you first before hunting the moron down

-He was a bit concerned when he didn’t see you come back up after you fell

-Turns out, you scraped your knee pretty horribly and now you were bleeding all over the floor

-He’s even more quiet than usual as he helps you up and half carries you to your next class

-He starts taking care of your knee in the middle of DevilDom history he doesn’t give a flying fuck

-He’s still furious by the time he gets home and most of his brothers know to leave him be when he makes that scary ass face

-No talk to him

-He angy

-“Does your knee still hurt?”

-“A bit but it’s not-“

-“Come nap with me.”

-“Why?”

-“Naps shall cure your pain.”

-“...”

-“Nah but for real come take a nap with me.”

-Next day at school, the dude from yesterday walks by him and Belphie smashes his head against the wall

-Before walking away as if nothing happened

-I stan protective Belphie

These HCs are really bad but I love them anyway

Al~

#obey me #obey me asmodeus #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphegor #obey me imagines #obey me leviathan #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me satan #⭐️ requests #☂️ demon brothers #🌸 comfort #💞 Protective Bois

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threecrowsinatrenchcoat · 3 years

Text

Paint My Spirit Gold

Dukeceit Week Day 2: Green/Yellow

Fans of the YouTubers "Deceit" and Remus "The Duke" Sanders start to suspect that maybe, just maybe, the two of them are more than simple internet pals.

AO3 Link: [here]

Word Count: 2187

Warnings: n/a

@dukeceitweek <3

[ID: A screenshot of a Twitter post by user @CallMeDukie. It features a watercolor-style painting of a snake. The snake appears to be made of melting chocolate, and there is a large bite taken out of its tail. Cherries and jam are leaking out of the snake at the bite wound. The snake's expression of horror is overly-exaggerated to the point of comedy. The caption reads: "liked your snake boi, @SerpenThyme. thanks for the inspo." /end ID]

A notification ding cut Janus off mid-sentence.

“Wow, someone left their cell phone on, so professional,” he said, giving the camera a dramatic eye roll. That someone was him, of course, because he was the only one in the apartment- just him and the running livestream- but that was no excuse not to be a drama queen about it. He finished wiping flour off his hands and grabbed his phone to silence it; but the notification made him pause. He flicked his eyes up toward the camera and gave a slight smirk.

“My goodness, I’m famous,” he drawled. “The Duke himself has graced little old me with some fan art.”

Most of the comments in the chat wanted him to show it, so Janus opened up Twitter to see the full post he’d been tagged in. It was a watercolor painting of the coiled-snake chocolate sculpture- lovingly named Jake by his viewers- he’d made for his YouTube video last week; it was wearing an expression of such comedic horror that Janus had to stifle a laugh. He flicked his phone screen toward the close-up camera on his counter so his viewers could see.

“How kind of you, Remus,” he said. “All of you should go scold him for what he’s done to poor Jake here.”

Most of his viewers would know he was joking- after all, they were the ones to nickname him Deceit when he provided neither a real or fake name for his online persona. They knew full well what he was like by now.

The oven timer dinged. Janus silenced his phone and set it aside.

“And our first batch of cookies is done. You know, why don’t we show the Duke some appreciation?”

[ID: An Instagram post by user @SerpenThyme. The photo is an artistically-framed shot of a stack of sugar cookies with green, yellow, and pink icing. Propped up against the stack is another cookie, with an intricate icing-drawing of an octopus. The photo appears to have been color corrected to have high contrast, low saturation, and a dark vignette at the edges. The Instagram user @OctoDukie is tagged. No caption. /end ID]

“You know, I have often been accused of actually being a little old lady, what with my fondness for knitted jumpers, rocking chairs, and incredibly fucked up murder mystery books. Today I am doing nothing to dispel this accusation, by making soup.”

The studio was dark and empty aside from Remus' workspace. Everyone else had left long ago, even his own brother, which meant that it was officially ass-o'clock in the morning (or, as most people called it, somewhere between 1 and 2 a.m.) But Remus was stuck in hyperfocus, honed in on putting the last touches on a commission that he'd been putting off for weeks. It's not that it was a tough painting- once he'd gotten started, it was actually a very creatively satisfying piece- but man, executive dysfunction could go suck a dick

“French onion soup, specifically. Because while I do like to pretend I am a classy bitch, I am also, regrettably, a lazy bitch with a distaste for anything that takes longer than one bottle of wine to make.”

Remus hated working in silence. It was stifling, almost suffocating. His brain needed noise like his lungs needed air. So when the studio had grown still and silent, Remus had flipped open his laptop and queued up some YouTube videos.

“So we have here three pounds of onions that we need to slice up, pole to pole. You’re going to cry no matter what, so if you have any memories you’ve been repressing since middle school, now is an excellent time to dredge those up.”

And if it happened to be 90% SerpenThyme videos, well. Sue him.

“Now the first rule of caramelizing onions: fast and sloppy is always better than slow and thorough… at least, that’s what every man I’ve ever slept with tells me.”

Remus choked and glanced over to his laptop screen just in time to catch Deceit's trademark smirk directed at the audience just for a moment. It was the deadpan delivery that always got him. Remus could barely hold onto a joke long enough to get through it without cackling mid-punchline, but this fucker could say the funniest shit like an off-hand comment.

He wiped his hands off on his jeans (what use were clothes if you couldn't use them as paint rags?) and pulled his laptop across the table. He typed out a quick comment, citing the timestamp of the joke, and after it was posted, he shut his laptop.

'Cause ass-o'clock was short for "get-your-ass-home-or-I’ll-kick-it" o'clock.

[ID: A screenshot of a YouTube comments section. The first comment is by user TheDuke, and reads: "10:42 wow, rude." The second comment is a reply by user SerpenThyme, and simply reads ";)" /end ID]

Janus plopped down on the couch with a slight groan. He didn’t need to stream today, but he really hated missing days. Besides… he was fine. Really.

He adjusted the camera until he was happy with the framing, and then checked the settings on his streaming software. Satisfied, he started the stream, and watched as his usual viewers rolled in.

“What do you mean I’m not in my kitchen?” Janus drawled, addressing the chat. He glanced around with an expression of faux-shock on his face. “My goodness, when did that happen?”

He chuckled, and then gestured to his surroundings. “Yes, we are in my living room today. If you must know, my closest and most trusted friend tried to murder me today- yes, Virgil, it was attempted murder and nothing less- and I survived with nary a scratch… and a broken foot, but that is beside the point. Anyway, I’m not allowed to stand for long periods of time, and I may or may not be somewhat inebriated by pain pills and couldn’t stand even if I wanted to. So we are cooking from my couch today.”

Janus paused for a few moments to read the chat messages as they popped up. A few get well soon’s, a few theories about the “attempted murder,” Virgil- who moderated his chat for him- vehemently denying the “attempted murder” but otherwise refusing to clarify the event, and a large volume of wtf why are you streaming today, take care of yourself comments, which made him smile. But one particular comment caught his eye, almost lost amid the torrent of an active chat: wait this kinda looks like the Duke’s living room?

“Oh, VampSuga,” he said, addressing that commenter in particular with a slight smirk. “I haven’t the faintest idea what you’re talking about. Anyway, since I can’t reach my oven from here, I thought some no-bake cookies were in order. For these you will need-”

[ID: A screenshot of a Discord conversation. The text reads:

“VampSuga: Ok ok hear me out. Dukeceit.

Starstruck96: who?

IneffableSnek: lmao

FeralBeauYasha: lol

VampSuga: Deceit and Remus Sanders! They’re totally dating. I will die on this hill.

FeralBeauYasha: Isn’t the duke w/ PatPat?

IneffableSnek: no thats his brothers bf

FeralBeauYasha: ohh

VampSuga: Did anyone see Deceit’s stream today? I swear that’s the Duke’s livingroom.

StarStruck96: idk that seems like a stretch

IneffableSnek: no wait i kno what u mean

IneffableSnek: im watching the duke’s old videos and that one where he shows off all his old weapons he’s in a living room kinda like deceit’s

FeralBeauYasha: They were acting all cute on twitter too

VampSuga: DUKECEIT” /end ID]

"Hey guys, been a while since you've seen my face and not just whatever my hands are busy with, when it's within YouTube's terms and conditions I mean. They used to be way more lenient…" Remus trailed off for a moment, then shook his head sharply and plastered on a grin.

"Anyway! In June me and a few other creators did a fundraiser for the Trevor Project, and y'all smashed the goal, so I let you decide what video I'd make this month." He paused, and gestured to the mountain of clothes piled behind him on the bed. "And you had so many juicy ideas to choose from, but you decided to dress me up like a Barbie instead."

Remus paused to scroll through his phone for a few moments. "Ah, ok, here we go. Twitter user YoonIsMyCat- oh, BTS, nice- sent in this first outfit. Uh… future Remus, put up the post here somewhere." He gestured vaguely to his right. "Y'all went with either a fuckton more clothes or a fuckton less clothes, which I respect. Apparently this outfit is called…” He squinted at his phone. “Amish chic? I take it back, no respect at all.”

Remus cycled through the outfits his viewers sent in, which ranged from the aforementioned “Amish chic” to “2008 rave attire” to “ok now you guys are just fucking with me” (which consisted of one of those big puffy snow coats, lime green in color; booty shorts with the shrug text emoji across the ass; fuzzy pink boots; and a yellow cowboy hat to top off the whole thing. It was awful. Remus loved it.) The mountain of clothes on the bed gradually became a mess of clothes spread across the floor instead, until there was just one outfit left.

“Ok so Twitter user VampSuga sent me this outfit that I’m gonna call ‘sexy librarian.’ I couldn’t find this exact sweater online, but-” he paused for dramatic effect, before brandishing a sweater toward the camera like a bullfighter. “My boyfriend had something that was close enough.”

Remus hopped up from the bed and switched off the camera so he could change.

“They’re going to lose their minds,” a voice drawled from the doorway. Remus threw his shirt at him.

“Shoo, I’m getting naked.”

[ID: A Twitter post by user @CallMeDukie. It features a selfie of YouTuber Remus “The Duke” Sanders, a Hispanic man with his hair dyed green and styled into a spiked mohawk. He is wearing a yellow knitted cardigan over a black button-up shirt. He is grinning widely at the camera. The caption reads: “my viewers pick my outfits! now live on youtube. go see what i look like as a sexy librarian!” /end ID]

DukeceitStan

first and only dukeceit shipper ig

DukeceitStan

wow there’s so many of you now! Hi!!

DukeceitStan

i want this to be canon so bad omg

DukeceitStan

i mean just look

[image]

how

[image]

cute

[image]

[ID: A series of three gifs featuring Youtubers SerpenThyme, aka Deceit, and TheDuke, aka Remus Sanders. Deceit is a black man with long, dreadlocked hair, and vitiligo patches along the left side of his face. Remus is a Hispanic man with green-dyed hair styled into a mohawk, many ear and facial piercings, and tattoos covering both arms. Each gif is edited so that the highlights are tinged yellow when Deceit is seen, and tinged green when Remus is seen.

The first gif depicts a close-up shot of Deceit’s hands as he carefully decorates a cookie with green and yellow icing. The cookie art he is working on appears to be a half-finished octopus. The gif then fades into a mid-shot of Remus, with his back to the camera, facing a canvas. The canvas is blank, and Remus appears to be laying out paints on a table to his left.

The second gif depicts Deceit seated at his couch, facing the camera. He has many ingredients spread across his coffee table (including oats, cocoa powder, and butter) and appears to be in the process of laying out several more. The gif fades to show Remus seated at a similar couch with a similar coffee table in front of him. The camera is angled slightly downward to better show the myriad of knives spread out across the table. Remus is gesturing wildly with a morning star held in his hand.

The third gif depicts Deceit in his kitchen. He is pulling on a bright, yellow knitted cardigan, and smirking toward the camera. The gif fades to show Remus in his bedroom, seated on his bed. He is holding up a similar-looking cardigan toward the camera and grinning. /end ID]

“Remus, it’s almost two in the morning. Come to bed.”

“I’m coming, sorry. Twitter distracted me.”

“Mm. I can’t believe the bird app is more distracting than I am.”

“You should try harder.”

“Come to bed and maybe I will.”

“Ok, ok, I’m coming. Hang on though, is it cool if I post this?”

“Sure. They figured it out anyway.”

“Sweet. Ok, Jannie, I’m coming.”

[ID: A screenshot of a Twitter post by user @CallMeDukie. It reads: “Dukeceit is canon.” /end ID]

#dukeceit #dukeceitweek #remus sanders #janus sanders #sanders sides fic #kye writes

18 notes · View notes

darthbecky726 · 3 years

Text

Bad Batch 1x01 spoilers

I've never done something like this before, but I figured I'd start. Reactions to the first episode of The Bad Batch. (This ended up being a lot longer than I intended, but whatever)

Spoilers under the cut

Red logo burning away starts strong

Yay narrator dude!!

Feels like clones wars

Animated rots scenes!!

And what grevious did after the rots beginning

HOLY SHIT DEPA!!!!!

And caleb right???

And we're in

Omg who voiced young caleb bc it sounds a lot like fpj but aged down and he def doesn't sound like the 14 I know he was when this happened

I like how we started out on familiar characters but not ahsoka or anyone from tcw. We started w young kanan and his master and we know what happened to them and all but if anyone watching hasn't seen rebels they wouldn't be lost as to who caleb and depa are, they'd just assume they're random jedi in o66

Good ol droid screaming as it falls off a cliff

Wow. Them.

I love crosshair

And wrecker

And tech

And echo

And hunter

B1's are so dumb

Lmao the salt from hunter

I feel like depas forehead pearls are a bit unrealistically large but I have no cultural standpoint to really know so...

Caleb's voice is too deep in the same way that jack frost from rotg's voice doesn't match his character model

Ah wrecker not really knowing what she means and echo, the one who has been trained to deal w people and hung out w ani and obi is just like 'thanks general'

Obes kenobes mention

Why is echo so pale

Depa and caleb feel a little too pale too tbh I wonder if it's the lighting or the whitewashing

Wow caleb is a lot like ezra, I can see why kanan wanted to train him lol

Is this what separates caleb and depa, leading to her telling him to run??? Do I need to read dume???

Oh no

Noooooooooo

Bb didn't get the order!

Oh caleb nooooo! Nooooooo they didn't receive that order, they can help you!!!

And he's gone

Oh I need an au where caleb stayed with bb and they helped him after depa died

Hunter sounds so much like rex it's weird like ik they're supposed to sound the same but it feels like wrecker is replacing rex or something. Even tho ik rex's story is over for the time being

Crosshair, no! Don't shoot at him! He's baby

Oh no did crosshair get o66???? It didn't seem to trigger anything in any of the rest of them, but is crosshair close enough to 'reg' for it to have triggered???

😭😭good soldiers follow orders

"sure thing, boss" "hey hunter got a sitch"

Crosshair acting sus

Oh I love watching padawans fight, they're so good!!

I hope that hit to the tree did a lil cognitive recalibration for crosshair, he was acting crazy

Caleb looks so scared!! He just watched his master get gunned down by his friends and now strange clones are trying to kill him/confusing him

Oh caleb

Oh no crosshair don't try to kill him!! Hunters trying to help!

Also hunter doesn't sound as much like rex w the helmet off, but it's weird bc most of the clones are distinguishable by voice even w helmets on. I guess it's the 'im in charge' voice

Star wars if caleb had gone w the bb

Oh hunter u sly dog lying to crosshair so he doesn't go after him. U gotta figure out why crosshair responded to o66 and no one else in ur unit did

Oh crosshair knows he's been lied to

I will always love coming-out-of-hyperspace shots

Ooh kamino, always nice this time of year

Echo is done w wrecker

Why hasn't crosshair taken his helmet off yet, lil bit sus

They better get his chip out on kamino, I don't wanna deal w this

Oof hunter

Oh who’s that, giving me cloud city vibes

Extreme cloud city vibes wow

Never realized how many clones are just on kamino

Coruscant guard?!?! FOX?!?!

The vibes here, omg

‘The war is over’ wow

Oh no who was that

A female jedi, doesn’t appear to be shaak, couldn’t see any montrals but never know, we don’t officially know how or where she died

Ok wow none of the bb has their helmets on except for crosshair, who got the order. The regs around kamino all have their helmets on. That scene in victory and death when ahsoka took rex’s helmet off-

And crosshair, he’s actins strange too

Oh tech, do u guys get bullied by regs a lot??

I love their barracks

Lol he finally took his helmet off only to stick a toothpick in his mouth, can he get anymore cliched?

Wrecker is seeming a lot more infantilized than he was in the s7 eps...

Yeah crosshair’s being sus

Ooh, he shifted his toothpick

Lmao ‘what programming’

Well documented my ass

Tech’s speech patterns are so stiff and robotic, it’s like he has to remind himself to talk in basic instead of binary or some shit

Tech throwing shade at crosshair

I can’t quite tell if we’re supposed to like crosshair at this point

Lmao we been knew

Oop ‘more machine than man’ the vader parallels are serving folks

Understatement.

Ugh sheev

Crusty ass bitch

Straight from rots wow

Who is the mystery child and why does he look mandalorian

Ooh he gone

Oh no, the beninning of the empire

Cheering?? Why?!?

That imperial march fade in tho

Thank you echo

Oh shit mystery child is female

Omega, I would not have guessed the pronunciation of your name by reading it wow

She def seems mandalorian

Ugh kaminoans

Oh the kaminoan pronounced it as it usually is, huh.

Omega’s character model def seems more masculine than female, I now headcanon her as trans

Ugh tarkin, I hate that crusty bitch

Empire politics ugh

I love how much shade is being thrown at tarkin and his stormtrooper proposal lmao

Why do all these clones have the standard haircut?? ik them boys like their variety, even if these boys are still under o66′s programming

Wrecker you’re being extremely loud

They’re all being loud in the mess, why

They remember, kid

Lol child

Oh my sweet summer children

The dad instinct was clearly passed genetically from jango lol all these clones got it

Why are background characters so mean? What about it, shiny? Why is ur hair regulation, reg??

The Sad Batchn omg the slander

Lol the food fight I’ve read about in the fics, its finally happening!

Is she.... australian??

The over-animation of character movements in this is reminding me of the looser style of rebels, as opposed to the more clunky style of tcw

Lmao he’s still got food on him

Food fight!!

‘Not again’???!!! Echo!! Wdym not again?! Food fights have happened before?!?? Wait. W bb or w torrent, bc I can see torrent having food fights on the resolute-

Crosshair’s just eating his food until someone messes

I like how echo still has his kamas

Oh no echo!!

Oh echo’s trauma, he doesn’t trust medical droids! Where’s kix when u need him, huh?

Lol, comically long name for a robot trope is alive and well, huh

Lmao the droid lowers his voice like ik this is a perceived bad thing, but I will not tolerate this slander, boys u need to get off kamino

‘The shock’ lmao whyyy

Lmao tech!!

Oh, echo recognized tarkin from the citadel!

‘When you blew up’ lmao

Oh they make me sad

Aaaaah fox!

Man the domino squad nostalgia

Those droids look cool

This is a neat scene, I like seeing them in action

Wrecker reminding me of hevy, but he’s got the training and success to back it up

Live fire???? No!!

Ugh I hate tarkin

Oh no wtecker

Did he just get shot!???!

Oh no crosshair, be careful!

Tarkin’s trying to kill them!!!

Lol wrecker I love you

Echo using his mech hand as a weapon, truly an arc

Now I wanna see what happened on felucia

I like how tech’s just sitting on the droid’s shoulders

And hunter just had a knife

These boys, I love them

Oh no tech bby

Hot damn that was cool

Wrecher things so too lmao

Tarkin’s like “why didn’t that work??’

Oh new baby clones

No tf they could not, they would never serve the empire and those bitches

I love that they have a window apartment lol

Ugh tarkin u shifty

They all stand at attention, only after glaring at tarkin

Oh no onderon

I hate tarkin, he’s a bitch

How quickly could bitch lord and darth sad have replaced the armory on kamino??

Crosshair still acting sus

Neither does echo, kid

No.

I like omega.

Crosshair, with the sassy hand on the hip-

What does that even mean?? Or elude to??

Lmao tech messing w wrecker, they rlly r bros

Its prob the vegetation

Oh, I missed onderon, but not this much

Lol the put-upon sigh

Its clearly saw and his rebels

Saw! Looking sharp, what’s w the hair....

That’s a very geometric beard, saw

They didn’t kill any jedi!

That’s not what happened, tech

‘The clones’ bitch that was rex and ahsoka, check urself

Aw, I’ve always like the design of imperial probe droids

Thank you, echo

It seems like crosshair’s o66 programming and his mutation are warring w his morals

Lmao the shade

I knew she was an enhanced clone!

Oh, so she is (at least on paper) trans! She’s a clone of jango, and yet she’s female! That must be her modification, but it makes me wonder why

Lol *flicks toothpick*

Aw, they have a picture of themselves! Recent-ish, too, its got echo!

Oh no, AZI!

The difference between them arriving earlier and now, the lack of escort...

Creepy how they had to open the hanger door themselves

Oh no! Everyone!

The coruscant guard, I wish they had gotten better

Tarkin u dramatic bitch

‘The brig’ this ain’t some tallship

Lol echo that shade

Their blacks are different from the ones seen in the past

Crosshair, stop being a bitch

Oh, I don’t like that phrase!! And the fact that crosshair screamed it in echo’s face makes me uneasy. Did rex fill echo in on why fives died?? I hope so...

Crosshair, ur chip hurting??

This child, I like her.

No! Don’t hit hunter!

No crosshair!!!!

I dislike this immensly

So they do still have inhibitor chips!

Tarkin you monster

Oh poor crosshair

ihatethisihatethisihatethis

Lol tech I love you

Wrecker you sweet pea

Lol that’s adorable

I love how they form a “wall” its so suspicious

He was about to say that, omega

Aaww, echo protective boi

Wrecker shut up tf

That was cool

Sneaky bois

This reminds me of rex and ahsoka sneaking around in v&d

Echo runs so stupid

Oh no they winter soldier’d him!

If he says who the hell is crosshar, I will lose my shit

Yes, he has. They took it from him.

The toothpick

I wonder how they’re gonna get crosshair back to normal

Not good that they nabbed the sniper

Oh, crosshair shot him in the same place he got hit during training!

Ooh, a kaminoan on their side!

I hope omega doesn’t die

Poor trigger etiquette, crosshair

Wonder if omega has any speciality training

They’re just gonna leave him there!?!?!?!?!

Nooooooooooo!!!!!!!

Omega reminds me of young boba

Oh, so its in her dna

Go back for crosshair!!

Holy fucking shit that was amazing! I didn’t expect it to be that long, but I’m not complaining! This ended up being a lot longer than I anticipated, but I don’t feel like cutting anything out, so sorry for the long post but at least I put it under a cut.

#bad batch spoilers #bad batch #spoilers #star wars #long post #play by play #sw #becky's fandom rambles

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appsa · 4 years

Note

thoughts on catra meeting huntara again?

Jdkzjdk now that we know for sure that adora definitely had a huge crush on huntara because of her Thing for muscles and mean girl sexy, i feel like the comic potential of this just sky rocketed

Catra immediately picks up on the fact that adora had a crush on huntara and is already prepared to not like her. U know that post where catras like "adora doesnt want me.... not the way i want her..... because im not swole 😔😔😔"?? yeah. Huntara is swole and catra hates it.

(Also... she doesnt like reminders of her time in the crimson waste. It just makes her think about things she could have-- should have-- done different)

Meanwhile Huntara knows this is the same five foot catgirl who took over the crimson wastes for a total of 5 hours, turned some of her allies against her, almost destroyed the world... yeah shes not a fan

Long story short they dont get along.

Adora being the goof she is, tries her best to make them get along but like. Zjshzjd it only makes it worse

Theyre just... too similar. Both are hardened from their time in the horde, both hate showing weakness, both get super defensive and angry very quickly

Caring for Adora should be smth they have in common but... lmao doesnt pan out like that

Yknow who does make a breakthrough for them tho??

Its Perfuma

Idk what it is about that girl but like she literally is magic with big bad mean lesbians

Perfuma is literally like "my connections with my friends make me strong" and "if you let yourself be vulnerable, there might be wonderful things waiting for you", and all these assholes who probably tumbled out of the womb with resting bitch face just go like 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

Im just picturing huntara and perfuma hang out together just to do like... idk self care stuff and so when she starts hanging out with catra she thought hey!!! Theyre similar enough maybe they'd get along

Shes wrong

The second catra and huntara lay eyes on each other theyre just pointing at each other like that spiderman meme and going "YOU!!!!!!!!!!" in a dramatic fashion

And basically they calm down and grudgingly decide to get along because the one thing that they agree on is that perfuma doesnt deserve to have a bad day

But that doesnt stop them from like making passive aggressive taunts at each other the entire time while theyre like... trying meditate or whatever

Eventually perfumas just like OK GUYS. U obviously have some issues with each other so just let it out.

"This is a safe space" says perfuma though its barely audible over how hard the other two are groaning at it

Anyway it actually IS a safe space because perfuma worked rly hard to make it so, so the truth eventually comes tumbling out

Huntara is like "Well I Think Adora Could Do Better Than You"

And to her utter mortification, catra starts crying.

"You think i dont know that??"

And basically it turns into a heart to heart. Catra admits that despite how much work she does as community service to fix the damage that happened after the war she still feels that it will never be enough to make up for what she did to so many people.

And huntara admits that the reason she feels like catra doesnt deserve forgiveness for what she did was because she herself was once a part of the horde and did terrible things that she thought she couldnt be forgiven for it. Its why she ended up at the crimson waste in the first place

And they both end up agreeing that it was adoras faith in them that allowed them to even think that they could be better people

And that maybe if they could learn to be accepting of each others pasts they could be more accepting of their own

Anyway it ends in a lot of cathartic crying and jock-like shoulder pats because theyre not quite at the hugging stage yet

Perfuma is just watching this unfold in amazement like.... damn i knew i was good but not this good

Anyway point is, if scorpia is president of the Perfuma Fan Club, catra and huntara are competing to be vice president

Anywaay ur welcome, that is the plot of season 6 episode 2 of she ra and the princesses of power

#this got LONG IM SORRY #spop #she ra #jsajhsdj #perfuma is just the mean desert lesbian whisperer #shut it apsa #ask #listen if ur gonna send asks u have to be prepared cause i dont like half assing these things zjdhjxjf #TBH WITH U i dont remember huntara and catra meeting in canon at all zjzjhajxj #cause xhzjhd i literally dont have the guts to watch s3 at allll #meta #until i think of another tag for these things lmao

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youngbugandtonystank · 3 years

Note

i just want to get something off my chest :( idk if someone else feels this way but i feel so angry and disappointed everytime tony would act so adamant in keeping morgan or protecting her in endgame...i just they teased irondad for so long and we were supposed to see tony grieve and fight for peter instead of seeing him protect a different kid. i know i sound childish but i dont like morgans storyline she was just created to make tonys death more sad and its unfair they took the last pt1

pt2 the lasts irondad moments from us to give morgan and tony scenes. Morgan is an adorable kid and i dont blame the actress but i wanted more peter and tony. they had the chemistry, the story, the emotions and the fandom. why would they choose morgan over irondad? i feel like the writers felt like peter wasn't important enough for tony to be sad about :( they felt like they needed to add a real reason for tony to fight im sorry for dropping this here

You don’t need to apologize, sweetheart. This is completely normal. Sometimes we get attached to some characters (the ones that bring us comfort) and it’s normal to feel disappointed when writers make a decision like that.

tony would act so adamant in keeping morgan or protecting her in endgame

Yeah, I understand this part. It bothered me a little bit too especially because we all know that the only reason Tony wanted to have kids was because of his experience and relationship with Peter. The thing is, the writers really made a big deal out of Tony and Peter’s relationship, just like you said, they teased it a lot. In posters and promos, Peter was Tony’s shadow or in a representative way, they would always let us know Peter was the one Tony was fighting for. We all made our theories and thought Tony would be in a dreadful state because of Peter’s death.

Instead, we got to see him playing around with Morgan lmao

This is why so many people are angry. It’s pepperony/tony fans (most likely) vs irondad fans. Pepperony fans feel like it was OOC and unfair that Tony decided to sacrifice everything he had with Pepper and Morgan for someone like Peter and irondad fans feel cheated by Morgan’s inclusion. There are other fans who just don’t care about this and feel happy that Peter and Morgan are like siblings.

And you’re right when you say she was created to give Tony’s last moments a more dramatic taste. I think they could use Morgan but not right now. If they used her character, she would need to be older and I highly doubt they’re going to do such a huge time jump only for her. And the kid actress can’t come back without Pepper, and Gwyneth said she was done with Marvel. Maybe she can come back with Happy, but I think the MCU is done linking Peter with Tony because they feel like he’s ‘in Tony’s shadow’ lmaooo Don’t you know? You can’t visit family or friends because that means you’re being Iron Man Jr. if you do lmaoooo

i feel like the writers felt like peter wasn't important enough for tony to be sad about

Not really. Peter was important enough for Tony to sacrifice everything and everyone just to bring him back. He was enough for Tony to create/make possible time travel. He was enough for Tony to leave all of his creations and equipment to Peter. He was enough to be trusted the title of the ‘next tony stark’. And many other things. Peter was family to Tony. They created Morgan as a way of ‘completing’ Tony’s arc. They thought that if they gave him a taste of ‘happy ending’ (marrying, having kids, building a family) then killing him would feel less inappropriate and harsh.

It’s ok to feel that way. I’m sure a lot of people understand how you’re feeling. You’re allowed to dislike certain storylines. The MCU is a disaster sometimes.

#tony stark #peter parker #irondad #morgan stark #pepper potts #pepperony #marvel #mcu #endgame #avengers

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jougogo · 4 years

Text

mascaras the haikyuu queens would borrow from my bag

based on my unhealthy obsession with mascaras (pls someone sponsor me)

also there’s a crack drabble at the end please read it im wheezing

shimizu kiyoko

bombastic by doucce: HAVE YOU SEEN THIS GIRL'S GORGEOUS LASHES im so jealous, anyways this mascara has a good wand and it's really good for achieving a more wispy/voluminous/full look IN LIKE ONE SWIPE WTF THIS IS A GODSEND. literally looks like lash extensions, i could go on and on about this mascara. not flaky and this will survive through workouts! doesn't give you raccoon eyes so it's good ! (coming from an athlete with an oily eyelids so dw i gotchu covered) a personal fav of mine teehee, ranked #1 in my bag.

hitoka yachi

it's real! benefit: this mascara is so so good at lengthening and giving off that natural look, which i think yachi would appreciate because she doesn't like too much attention and it's natural so she can sneak this by her mom nope def not speaking from experience it's really great for beginners, and also very reliable and trustworthy. this lil thing will get the job done, guranteed.

tanaka saeko

better than sex by too faced: this mascara just screams I N T E N S I T Y. it's super voluminizing and gives off the appearance of a fuller lash. on the more dry/creamy side so it's super great for beginners or if ur really hungover. also it's v v reliable, will give you wispy lashes every time! my go to when im late which is everyday but we don't talk about that

michimiya yui

bad gal bang! by benefit: another really natural one, good at separating, very VERY lengthening. dramatic enough so that it'll make you look more awake but still not enough to get daichi's attention rip. but this shi!t will stay all day until you take it off. a little more liquidy so you get some time to fix any lashes that are stuck together. also, thin wand so great for bottom lashes as well! 10/10, very much recommend.

shirofuku yukie

waterproof lights camera lashes by tarte: i feel like she's the type to be drinking her water but then when she puts it down too quickly the water just splashes right back in her face?? LMAO or does this only happen to me, but she needs her mascara to be waterproof! also bc of all the steam from the yummy food contests she's conquering! anyways the queen deserves the whole spotlight so she gets the beloved lcl by tarte! the wand is pretty thin but don't let that fool you, because this wand is so good at lengthening and separating lashes. really good at holding curls.

suzumeda kaori

lash sensational from loreal: pls give this poor girl a break i cant even imagine running around the fukurodani team with bokuto's antics, they've definitely broken into her bags more than once and messed up her stuff. so she had to get the cheap drugstore mascara just in case </3 but its okay because this is one of my top 3, the consistency is really good and the wand is so amazing gahh, it has like different combs on different sides so if you have that one pesky pair of lash that just sticks together it'll be super easy to fix. perfect for on the go

misaki hana

kush mascara by milk makeup: you can't convince me that this girl isn't exhausted from the antics of johzenji, which makes this mascara perfect for her! the consistency is on the creamy/dry side so a couple quick swipes will get you the full lash. plus it's infused w some cannabis oil so it makes ur lash healthier (but terushima will definitely try to do some experiments w this so please hana guard it safely)

amanai kanoka

lash next door by brooklyn and bailey: ok ok so my fav thing about this mascara is that it's not waterproof so it's easy to take off, but it's water resistant so that it won't come off when you're all sweaty!! literally perfect for intense practices, and the wand is similar to lcm by tarte so they wield pretty similar results; sweet, curled, lengthened lashes!! and DOES NOT FLAKE it's literally a life saver

alisa haiba

liquid lash extensions by thrive: this mascara definitely the one i use the most! It’s unique in the sense that it’s a tubing mascara, so it’s water resistant which is great for alisa because she keeps tearing up every time lev messes up a serve (we stan a responsible sis) BUT it’s also very easily removed! just splash some warm water and the mascara literally slides right off im not even kidding. she definitely takes really good care of her appearance and will be sad even if she sees one eyelash fall so this is really great for her bc waterproof mascara is such a pain in the ass to remove. also very lengthening

yamaka mika

lash multiplier by revlon: mika is a baddie!! but daishou makes her cry so much she has to rebuy a tube like every month. so our lovely mika gets something easy, cheap, and has a good effect for puppy eyes. this mascara is just like the liquid lash extension; a tubing mascara,,,HOWEVER this one is WAY CHEAPER. u can def find this at ur local drugstore for like 6-8 bucks. great for on the go since it's easy to apply super fast, will get u a nice full fringe in like 3 swipes.

nametsu mai

damn girl! by too faced: how could i forget our beloved date tech manager,,,mai is def the scariest on date tech and she will let you know!!! this mascara is essentially a sequel to better than sex; your lashes will be bigger, fuller, and more glamorous! also the formula is literally so light it's like whipped cream,,, you will not feel a thing guranteed. it's like extensions but m a g i c

extra:

after being scolded by yukie for not getting dinner on time, the boys of the 3rd gym strolled through the dimly lit hallway on the way to the cafeteria. "yo, you know, i heard the girls bathrooms have couches or whatever," kuroo said, noticing the girl's bathroom as they walked past it.

"what! thats not fair!" bokuto whined. "how come the girl's stuff are always nicer? the boy's bathroom always just stinks, and there's always pee on the ground for some reason. like why can't you just aim? it's not that hard."

"well, im sure for short people, like maybe yaku-san or shoyo it's easy. but it's hard to aim when you're very tall!" lev explained brightly. in the onsen somewhere, morisuke yaku felt shivers go up his spine and a sudden urge to punch someone.

"lev, are u sure ur not the one peeing the floor? c'mon, man this is why we don't get nice things in our bathrooms!" kuroo groaned, flicking the first year’s forehead.

"well, it's just a rumor," akaashi explained, lifting the hem of his shirt to wipe off the sweat on his face. "there might not be a couch in the girl's bathroom."

"why don't you go find out?" tsukki taunted with a devilish grin on his face.

"i don't think this is a good idea," akaashi remarked, albeit a bit too late as hinata, kuroo, lev, and bokuto already sprinted down the hallway.

"aww, no couch" bokuto disappointedly wailed when he stepped into the girl's bathroom.

"well, this is a school bathroom after all," kuroo admitted as he flipped on the light switch. the bathroom was cleaner than the boy’s, for sure, but after all the outrageous tales they had expected to find at least a little something out of the ordinary.

"hey, what's this?" hinata was pointing to a bright pink makeup bag that was lying open on the counter.

"ooh, one of the managers must’ve left it behind! whose bag is this, is there a name on it?" lev rushed over to the bag and turned it upside down. dozens of colorful tubes and compacts fell out, splayed across the counter.

"whats this tube?" hinata asked, holding up a metallic pink tube.

"well, what does it say on the tube, dumbass?" tsukki smirked from the door frame he was leaning on. akaashi hesitantly stood behind him, questioning if entering the girl’s bathroom was a good decision.

"better..than sex!" hinata read aloud, a bit louder than he had intended to. everyone froze, and stared at the little pink tube.

"wait what the fu- hold up lemme see that," kuroo aggressively grabbed the tube from hinata's hands and twisted it open

"oh it's just macasara," bokuto said. they shouldn’t have been surprised, considering it did come out of a makeup bag.

"do you think the name is true?" kuroo was actually curious about this. is the little pink tube of innocent looking mascara the reason that girls were refusing to go out with him?

"let's see," bokuto snatched the tube out of kuroo's hand and started swiping on the pigment on his lashes, his mouth agape and head tilted back as he intently stared at his reflection in the mirror.

"it's been 10 minutes since we called the boys, should we check up on them?" yachi said nervously. the other girls turned and looked as if she had just made a revelation. "you're right, bokuto always sprints up for dinner and he looked pretty eager when we gave him his notice," kaori said nervously. "and everyone knows that the nekoma boys shouldn't be left alone, they're chaotic," shirufuku remarked. "that's so true...lets go find them," the rest of the managers agreed, taking off their aprons and stepping out of the cafeteria.

however, they heard the boisterous laughs a floor away. cautiously, kiyoko led the group down the stairs and followed the sound. imagine their surprise when they found the noise coming from inside the girl's bathroom.

"um, we're the only girls here…" yachi whispered. they crept up closer and closer until they were right outside. kiyoko put her finger to her lips and motioned for the girls to line up against the wall just in case. "okay, we'll open the door in 3…" she put her hand on the knob. "2…" it seemed like time was in slow motion as everyone's heart pounded loudly. "1!"

kuroo and hinata have mascara on their eyebrows, streaks of black pigment under their eyes and all over their cheeks like some kind of war paint. akaashi is holding an eyelash curler, trying to curl bokuto's eyelashes all the while bokuto is smacking akaashi's hand away.

"it looks like a torture device!" he cried.

"bokuto-san, it's suppose the enhance the lengthening effect,"

lev is trying to give himself a mustache by swiping on hair-like strokes with the mascara wand, and ever the opportunist, tsukki is in the corner, taking blackmail pictures

"oh, hi!. . . girls" hinata trailed off when he saw the horrified managers through the mirror. every face in the room paled white as a sheet.

extra no.2:

"wait how do i take this off, it's not coming off with water!!" bokuto wailed, slumping against the sink

he had unfortunately, picked the waterproof mascara.

the managers agreed that they have all conveniently ran out of makeup wipes

#haikyuu!!#haikyuu crack #haikyuu kiyoko #haikyuu yachi #nekoma #karasuno #fukurodani #kuroo tetsurō #haikyuu kuroo #hq akaashi #akaashi x reader #akaashi #haikyuu shoyo #hinata #haikyuu saeko #bokuaka

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jean----ralphio · 3 years

Text

IT’S BoB LIVEBLOG TIME

Episode 1 is under the cut!

Warning, I swear a lot... and am very in love with RSJ so a lot of this was just me pointing at the screen and screaming RICH and then remembering you can’t see me so writing it down...

Episode 1: Curahee! Curaahhee? Curraahhee? I can’t spell so I’m renaming it Ross is a punk bitch

Buckle up my babies, this will be a carcrash!

00:01 Here we fucking go aw yis

00:11 Aw who’s this? I wish they named the gentlemen at the start of the episodes, I wanna know who is who :s

00:25 Shifty, is that you my angel son?

00:41 OMG you guys… these men are breaking my heart </3

01:06 Lord, men were committing suicide because they couldn’t go to fight? That mentality… man. Oh my God, you angels. Babies.

01:36 No jokes allowed, every man is <3

01:40 Now that I’m humbled and we’re all well and truly miserable…the credits, ugh, my heart. The score is amaziiiing. Some of the footage is actual war-time footage, I read, which is a brilliant touch.

02:01 DICK <3

02:13 DICK’S HUSBAND <3

02:18 RSJ’S NAAAAAME

02:27 JFC this music makes me so emotional. Look there’s Matthew Settle’s face. That makes me emotional too

02:48 Ah it’s Roe <3

03:48 I’m trying to pick them all out in the line-up but I can’t tell who is who. Are we supposed to be able to? There’s a short one in the middle, is that Harry?

03:49 I’m not drunk enough to handle this

04:10 Upottery? Ah it’s so English I love it. That’s not a name! Wtf is up with English place-names, you guys have the weirdest names. Upottery? Seriously? Is it only potters that live there? I’m so confused

04:22 Close up of Roe! Perfect. I approve.

04:32 Is that the guy from Line of Duty? I think it is

04:39 Lip <3

04:44 Ew. GTFO Cobb. He doesn’t even go here

04:47 IS THAT RICH? RICH. ILY. ILY RICH. Please note that 94% of this will be a Rich-watch

04:53 Lieb stop. I am sure you are not a certified hairdresser

04:56 RICH. SMOKING. SMOKING RICH. More like smoking hot do you see what I did there?

05:20 I can categorically say that I love Joe Toye. I do. I love him. But every time I see Kirk Acevedo, all I think of is Charlie my baby from Fringe (awesome show, please watch it). And I just. Charlieee <3

05:39 Aw. They’re so sad

05:55 They’re so despondent. Guys. It’s fine

06:05 Fassy?? FASSY!!

06:18 God Damien is pretty

06:25 Nix that’s not how you flirt

06:57 Lol at Dick noting its happy hour. Thinking about taking Nix on a date, are we? I bet you are. Now THAT is how you flirt!

07:24 OMG the fucking flirting! GUYS. “And give up all this?” NIX SAYS AS HE CHECKS HIM OUT

07:37 Yeah, Nix, you’ll take him ‘to Chicago’ huh? Is that what they call it nowadays.

07:44 Do you want to be that cigarette? ‘Cos there is nothing heterosexual about that lingering look, Dick

08:18 ‘Murica time

08:25 Ross, fuck off. Nice jacket though. “You PEOPLE are at the position of attention” ugh GTFO. Dick’s sideye tho lol

08:52 NGL Ross does a great job at being super unlikeable

09:05 Noooo you don’t want it with Johnny Martin. You wont win. Yeah, walk away Ross

09:15 Careful around Lip too, or Speirs will materialize out of thin air and snap your neck

09:33 RICH. Don’t be scared of that douchebag, baby

09:43 What kind of question is that, there is nothing Lieb wants more!

09:50 It’s weird hearing Ross swear tho

10:26 Don’t argue with Johnny, baby. Also Roe OMG <3 Shane is freaking fit

10:43 Wow Lip is ripped

10:48 Oh no, poor baby. Lip leave him be ☹ </3

11:10 LOL I just noticed the drum by the door. It says ‘butts’ and it took me a seconds to realise it was for cigarettes. I am an adult (31-year-old married woman). I’ll laugh at the word butts if I want.

11:11 RICH

11:18 Lieb omg lol

11:39 RICH BABY NO! FUCK OFF ROSS! LEAVE HIM ALONE OR I WILL HAVE SPEIRS CUT YOU

11:52 I can’t take Ross seriously in those shorts. Hi-ho GTFO

12:07 Ew fuck off running up that, I’d just nope out like nah babe imma go chill with that sweet baby back in the butts cabin

12:18 Aw Dick <3 The juxtaposition of Dick as a leader compared to Sobel who sure he might be honing them into something formidable and skilled but he’s an asshole. He’s not a leader. He’s a bullying, abusive scumbag. Dick is an actual leader who protects them and supports them and encourages them and IHAVEALOTOFFEELINGSOK

12:43 You don’t deserve that sick jacket, Ross. Seriously. That is a boss jacket, I want it

13:04 Have they not stopped fucking working out all this time? Ugh

13:23 Oh good, Dick gets a boss jacket too. He deserves it.

13:30 I wish people had to ask me for permission to speak.

13:53 I just. He. I can’t with Dick Winters, you guys. I cannot. I have lost the ability to can. Like they’re so upset and tired and low and just with that little joke he boosts their morale back up from where Sobel fucking beat it down into the mud and makes everything lighter and they laugh and are less tense and I just. Fucking love you, Dick.

14:00 Is that my angel son? I see you Shifty, love you baby

14:03 RICH. DON’T TOUCH MY RICH.

14:07 Oh my God, address them yourself you weirdo, Ross. They’re right there, you’re right there! I had a colleague that used to do the same, would get me to speak to my employees for her when they were right there in front of her like… ‘can you tell x to do y for me pls…’ … I was like wtf you know you CAN talk to them… you won’t catch poor just by speaking to people lower down the pecking order

14:22 Fassy! Wtf they’re not supposed to drink? Dehydration is legit one of the most dangerous things, how tf can you turn them into high-key supersoldiers if they’re dehydrated? How is this man so dumb? The guy in front of Fassy tho omg. I bet Fassy’s boss wife Alicia Vikander won’t like her husband being treated that way… she’s so badass tho right?

14:26 He’s so dramatic! Ugh

15:11 Piss off omg

15:24 oh my DVD flipped its shit here, only picked back up at 16:30 don’t @ me

16:52 RICH WHAT ARE THEY DOING TO YOU RICH

17:21 Shifty my angel son

17:46 so sweet

18:04 Sink, babe, no he is the worst, stop

18:20 LOL no, he’s jel as fuck babe

18:32 NO FUN ALLOWED. Im sorry, that tie is so ugly

18:44 Simon Pegg??!!

18:51 Ross is so dramatic God shut up. it’s not a conspiracy, weirdo

19:10 “It’s a can of peaces, sir.” Iconic.

19:11 Dick’s tiny smile is equally iconic.

19:17 SHUT UP ROSS

19:44 He wants to be punched, I think, like he’s goading them. The sick fuck.

20:47 DON’T TRUST HIM, DICK!

21:02 ROE <3

21:31 Hoobler, aw <3

21:37 I warned you not to trust him, boys

21:54 Ah boys, oh no

22:04 RICH. Kick him, baby

22:17 Bull, punch him, seriously

22:24 Oh Luz <3

22:26 Yeah GTFO, suck it, bitch

23:06 Who is this? Fella’s hot

23:40 RICH. FASSY. WEB. TAB.

24:19 Suck it, Ross

24:30 Real footage?

24:41 Lol you suck Ross

25:23 RICH. SMOKING RICH.

25:26 Bill omg

25:45 Perco, baby, no. don’t talk to Johnny Martin. Don’t look at Johnny Martin. Don’t so much as think about Johnny Martin. He will fuck you up with his gaze alone, baby

25:56 Ah Luz

26:06 OK. That’s hot. Joe/Charlie don’t be hot. It confuses me

26:42 Winnix being husbands in the corner

27:42 YOU’RE in the wrong position, dumbass, it’s no one else’s fault

27:46 Dick’s come to save the day

27:56 Ross knows nothing omg

28:05 RICH. Even my Rich is confused, Ross, you dweeb

28:20 Lol at Dick dropping down ready for a fight

28:36 Fassy isn’t happy. That means Alicia Vikander is coming for you. Joe/Charlie is definitely not happy. Lip is upset. Think about your life, Ross, think about your choices. You know you’ve failed when Roe is judging you

28:57 Nix is like lol where tf is the alcohol tho

28:59 Harry! Harry is here! But yes, baby, you’re interrupting the husband’s foreplay, leave immediately

30:00 Lol at the Nix vs Ross staredown. Nix won

30:17 RICH. GUYS IT’S RICH

30:33 Do it, Lieb. Drop the grenade. Just don’t upset my angel son Shifty

30:40 He is a literal angel. Don’t corrupt him Lieb

30:59 Nix is having another crack at flirting. “Going my way” so suave omg. Omg stop. No wait don’t

31:09 “I’m not the intelligence officer.” Neither is Nix half the time babe let’s be fair

31:14 “If I told you I’d have to kill you.” Nix is getting better at flirting! He’s been attending flirting 101 classes it seems

31:40 They’re legit such husbands prove me wrong

32:00 He’s not joking, Dick

32:06 Harry’s like oh yay yes please

32:11 Lol Nix

33:03 Ugh. Men. I feel like that hold smells so bad.

33:09 RICH. Naw, Rich is sad he’s missing out on the flamingos.

33:32 Joe/Charlie you deserve a day to commemorate you tbh. I love you.

33:46 “My brother’s in North Africa, he says it’s hot.” Bill is iconic.

34:34 Lieb, honey, don’t, please

34:49 I feel you, random hot guy. Tipper?

35:05 Eyyy this place is nice, let’s all move there.

35:17 Shifty, my angel son, my baby <3

35:26 Yay, Harry gets a boss jacket too!

36:22 Mum and Dad of Easy. I’m low-key living for Lip’s little worried faces.

36:33 THAT JACKET IS SICK AS FUCK I WANT 20

36:38 The fence is there, Ross, because you’re so fucking dumb

36:51 Guys, look, cows

37:06 He’s fucking useless. Hi Simon Pegg.

37:22 RICH

37:25 This whole scene gives me life and waters my crop

37:31 RICH <3. YOU GUYS. I CANNOT STRESS THIS ENOUGH. RICH RICH RICCCCHHHH

37:42 Poor Tip is so done

37:58 Simon Pegg is so confused

38:04 Good job, Tipper, I’m proud of you and your pretty face

38:10 Iconic

38:15 Keep it together Tip

38:54 The hand signals, no, I’d be like BABY. WHAT. I CAN’T UNDERSTAND YOU WTF. I’d last like a millisecond in the military lmao. Does my country even have one? Tbh probably not. Us Kiwis are too chill, cbf’ed with anything. Too busy watching rugby, drinking, and sulking that we can’t afford houses cos our housing market is fucked. But at least we beat Covid *shrugs*

39:06 ILY, old guy. You are the best thing in this episode, aside from Rich

39:22 But wait, there’s more weird Americans hopping out yo’ bushes

39:26 “Bloody hell!” Mood

39:47 “You’ve done it now, yanks, you’ve captured me!” He is such a mood. I love him.

39:54 FUCK OFF ROSS. “Would that be the enemy?” “As a matter of fact, yes.” DICK IS SO VALID I LOVE HIM THIS IS ICONIC.

40:25 Be free, moo-cows

40:40 LAMO GET WRECKED

41:00 Guys imma be straight with you. I’m on my third whiskey lmao.

41:10 Simon Pegg, please refrain from being a douchebag. Leave Dick and his husband to flirt in peace.

41:23 I love how Nix is like instantly suspicious. He knows.

41:39 Worried husband

41:45 “Misspelled court-marital.” Iconic

42:14 Ross, why you lying? So threatened and jel that you gotta lie omg.

42:50 God Damien is freaking hot. Guys.

42:57 Punk bitch Ross.

43:22 Dick is so BDE. It’s fucking hot.

43:30 Ross is shooketh tbh. Punk bitch.

43:36 AH! IT IS HIM! THE GUY FROM LINE OF DUTY S5!

43:50 That underbite must have hurt FJH a lot omg so committed.

44:02 Hey Lip <3

44:09 Johnny Martin has absolute BDE

44:22 God they’re willing to be killed just to not follow Ross. Same tbh.

44:57 This whole scene is BDE.

46:00 But Sink has the most BDE let’s be honest

46:44 The respect for Dick. Even after what they just went through. I AM EMOTIONAL.

46:58 He’s so worried like omg what have my troublesome sons done now

47:09 ROSS WHY YOU ALWAYS LYING??

48:09 Weak

48:24 Yeah, fuck off back to ‘Murica

48:34 Legit, can we acknowledge Ross did a great job (the actor). Really really well done, one of the best performances on the series tbh.

49:48 LMAO GET WRECKED PUNK BITCH

50:06 Dick just wanders about a lot on his own, huh?

50:50 What? What? I understand nothing of what the cockney guy is saying.

50:55 Me too, Hoob, the fuck.

51:00 RICH I SAW YOU

52:19 “Never put yourself in a position where you can take from these men.” Don’t omg I can’t, Dick, I’m weak, I can’t deal with these fucking feelings.

52:36 DAFUQ

52:40 OHHHH I get it. Right. Dick, you��re so smart. It’s a little sad they have to do all that just to get some answers and guidance but tbh it’s probably fair? Gotta be top secret so punk bitches like Ross can’t screw things up.

53:30 Hey Nix. Speak French to me any day.

53:48 Unf.

54:08 LMAO Lieb, how many cigarettes do you need!

54:10 NGL I paused here for a little while.

55:05 We could ALL use some brass knuckles, Joe/Charlie. Mood.

55:25 LOL Lieb is so nosy.

56:15 Oh no

57:00 Luz LMAO

57:10 Oh babies

57:13 Bill LMAO that’s not ice cream, yuck it looks like soup

57:28 God. All that effort. Not just logistically but emotionally, mentally, psychologically, to prepare, just to have it put off. Fuck.

57:38 That movie again. Poor boys.

57:47 That’s actually a really smart move, Johnny.

58:41 Oh no. I would lose it completely. Oh Bill </3

59:11 Naw, Dick dawdling around again

59:49 RICH I SEE YOU

1:00:08 AAAHHHH IT’S TOO CONFRONTING DON’T

1:00:48 NOOO I CAN’T aw Bill

1:01:09 Naww

1:01:16 RIIIIICH

1:01:20 It’s like they’re kiddies on a field trip and Dick is the teacher wrangling them lol

1:01:47 Lol their crap is so heavy Dick has to help pull them up. That’s actually really sweet.

1:01:51 I wish I could hold Rich’s hand

1:02:08 Oh God. I can’t. Like he’s helping them up BUT IT’S ALSO HIS WAY OF SAYING GOOD LUCK AND GOODBYE AND HAVING LIKE A MOMENT TO CONNECT WITH EACH OF THEM I CAN’T LIKE THE EYE CONTACT NO DICK STOP

1:02:19 LMAO at them having to shove each other into the plane

1:02:23 That look between him and Roe. Ugh. Like. You two gotta take care of your boys together. Brotp

1:03:22 Can someone explain the block on that guy’s helmet to me?

1:03:55 I’m sad. And scared. This series is so confronting. I’ve watched in annually since I was like 16 and I’m still so nervous for them.

1:05:37 Rich, I see you! I recognized his chin lmao

1:06:16 God, Dick be careful

1:10:00 This show. The feels. Every time.

#band of brothers #liveblog #episode 1 #Currahee #sp?#rsj #richard speight jr

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fruitylibrarian · 3 years

Text

quest of the spear live rewatch!

i already spewed my pre call to adventure flynn thoughts all over a text post but I would like to repeat: pre-canon flynn my beloved <3

yes he is a bit of a bastard but he just loves his books and he’s so genuinely just like. passionate and like…. Big? does that make sense? like i mean inside. not literally. bright

flynn’s mom is so fucking funny

and she’s Trying Her Best

you know one thing I don’t understand, I assume that flynn could afford to keep going to college because of like grants and scholarships since he’s all smart and like, even if his mom is well off, no one below the morally bankrupt millionaire line can pay for 22 degrees and not die of no-money-itis otherwise known as Starving

but like. why not become a professor or some other academia position?

you’d be incredibly overqualified and you’re a white dude, so while academia isn’t exactly bursting with new spaces to fill I’m sure you could find something???? and like. a professor in particular, while baby flynn might not be great at the connection part, seems like a natural progression to at least try for considering it keeps you in that comfort zone and familiar space just in a different albeit familiar role, and allows you to go on long lectures people can’t interrupt. and like, professors literally like, part of their job is research and to continue learning, so like. it seems like the natural choice for him to go for?

don’t get me wrong, baby flynn in particular might not be extremely well suited considering his lack of people skills, but plenty of professors are brilliant slightly odd smarties who give long, super engaging theatrical lectures (sounds like him!) but suck at one on one meetings and talking to people or may be accidentally insulting, but like, their class is genuinely interesting and they grade decently so like, I think he could get past that hurdle is what I’m saying

obviously he’d have to work at it and get the skills necessary but you know what that means? MORE SCHOOL, BABY! just in a different direction! like just? it seems like the obvious choice for his situation

ah yes!!! magic letter!!! it’s kind of funny they do this, it’s a great hook and way to make applicants go Uh Excuse Me and want to know more but also like, there’s no proof magic happened either?

although you’d think some people would get obsessive like let me tell you if i encountered real ass magic like that i wouldn’t stop until i had an answer

ah the Incredibly Long Interview Line. it’s kinda how funny how like. Not Special he is but at the same time he is?

“never been treated so badly in my entire life!” what did you say to him charlene

i’m sure he deserved it i just want to know

wait oh no i just realized

all these people are dead

every single one of them got murdered in the first episode of the series

jesus that’s dark

not gonna be able to stop thinking about that one huh

also love how it’s pretty evenly men and women

although it’s still mostly white

fuck that lady just left crying I know they’re doing this to turn up the drama but DAMN, charlene

god he almost gave up. remember the timeline episode where he never became the librarian? weird.

Gkjlfkgjhfglh Where Do You Think You’re Going? (weak gesture like “me?”) Yes You. Get In Here amazing how can she even see him she’s around the CORNER. camera? magical surveillance? why? just to freak people out? amazing.

i do so love charlene, it’s a shame she wasn’t in the show more

also she literally never explains shit. What Makes You Think You Can Be The Librarian he doesn’t even know what that means, charlene

He Doesn’t Even Have A Library Science Degree

oh wow he does actually have librarian qualifications lmao

why did i not remember that

DLKFGJDFG I did remember him sherlocking her tho

wait her MARRIAGE? to WHO?

i thought her and judson were a thing despite jenkins being into her or something?

huh

also why does this qualify him to be The Librarian™ like oh he can sherlock? ok?

maybe it’s just bc he had the balls to do it

well, the sherlock thing is also not completely unhelpful it just doesn’t seem central to his skills, or at least, not the way he uses it (do we see him use it like this again? he usually applies more obscure knowledge then ye classic deduction sherlockian skills if I remember correctly which I may not because my brain is smooth)

judson is such a fucking drama queen

LKDJFGLKDJFGLDKFJG I FUCKING FORGOT HE LITERALLY JUST FUCKING REPEATED HIS MOM’S LITTLE PHRASE AMAZING

also why did he seem to think her sending everyone home meant he didn’t get it why would she stop all interviews because you fucked up

he just fucking walked out of a wall judson you are so dramatic

also warehouse 13 vibes huh. welcome to a world of endless wonder

I could do a whole fucking thesis on warehouse 13 and the librarians or—well that’s a whole other tangent

anYWYA

this interview was remarkably easy tho, it’s not like he wasn’t impressive but it wasn’t mindblowing either????? this coming from a big fan of flynn

the big shiny wonderous eyes as the library lights up……flynn my beloved

also his floofy hair ldkfgjdlkfgj

he’s like this is too good am I being prank’d

why the mona lisa?????iIs the mona lisa magic??? It only became famous because it got stolen why would it be magic??? Is this one of those we make it magic by believing it or some shit things???

Flynn Do Not Open The Random Box In The Library Of Incredibly Dangerous Artifacts

oh hello excalibur !!

oh rip flynn immediately being like “oh im not worthy, trust me” with 100 percent certainty im hurt oof

KSJFLGKDJGLKDJG THE APPLE “the apple from the garden of eden…….” *judson takes a bite* “actually I just left this here”

excalibur hello properly!!!!

judson is such a fucking DRAMA QUEEN he’s so casual!! and cal you too you slippery bitch!

ah the jetpack.

DLFKGJDLKFGJ “it usually takes a new librarian four hours to find the jetpack. you did it in three! congratulations” love the implication that every librarian (at least since it was added to the library) has done this no matter how serious like the bad guy of this movie… *checks notes* edware wilde? jetpack. darrington dare, probably? jetpack. i like to think jenkins did it too (not technically a librarian, but you know)

flynn thinking of himself as embarrassing… ☹

HIS MOM IS SO PROUD OF HIM

part sweet, part funny, part rip

I don’t know what she was expecting when he said librarian tho like. originally he literally looked at shit for FRY COOk degrees don’t always mean shit you know

and librarian is up there with professor in Perfect Jobs For Flynn like what did you expect??? Like even if he’d become an archaeologist (a “cool” job) it’s not like that pays super well either as far as I know??

he was never going to be Traditionally Successful

he’s still the same person he still has the same strengths and passions of course he would go into academia and do something like librarian like????? her reaction saddens me.

just be happy for him!! look at him!!!

ok first of all even normal non magic librarians don’t just put books on shelves and that’s a condescending reduction of the job, and second of all, he is so happy!! he has a job, he’s taking responsibility, he’s meeting people, isn’t that enough??? isn’t that literally what you wanted??? even if it WERE what you think it is why couldn’t it just be a good first step??? like??? fuck??? you did been know that he was doing all those fancy degrees because he loved them not because they’d get him some super fancy job??? I mean egyptology is not the most profitable field you know this isn’t med school or whatever

god.

flynn’s mom, visibly not proud and very upset: of course im proud of you!

ok im being a little unfair, she’s trying and clearly she’s been supportive of him, if not straight up enabling of him, but like this is clearly being presented as like. normal person who is normal forced to take care of freakish strange son who is so nerdy and strange and a loser and she is so tired of his shenanigans and all that WORK she put in and he’s NOT FANCY AND CHANGING TO CONFORM TO HER IDEALS OF A GOOD SUCCESSFUL SON/MAN?

and that’s just all very. sigh.

the snake brotherhood are such obnoxiously cheesy villainous villains they’re even called the snake brotherhood

also I think we’re supposed to recognize him as the previous librarian from the painting but if I didn’t already know that I for sure would not know that

smartass flynn is a smartass

I never got people bringing someone coffee to impress them unless they knew their order like there’s no way you know who she likes her coffee so you could so easily get it wrong—like even if you don’t know exactly how much sugar she wants, you could also just get it entirely wrong like assume she likes black coffee but she likes it super sweet, or vice versa, or whatever. it can go wrong so easily!

or she could go “I Hate A Kiss Ass”

she did take it anyway tho so.

ah i did forget (or just not actively think about) how much like… christian mythology there is in this show :/ I mean we did been knew (excalibur and arthurian legend are pretty important to the mythology)

not that christian mythology is inherently bad it just gets a) annoying, b) boring, and c) y’know, very western centric and all

but then trying to reconcile di—you know what that’s a tangent for another time

then again I do assume no one is going to read this

the library really does just throw new librarians into death and go “hope this is fine!” huh

did they just imply god is canon in the “the librarian” universe

you were so cryptic with the no one thing!! just say NOONE

he’s scribbling in his notebook and mumbling out loud what a mood and I love him. what a nerd

ldfkgjdlkjg god sexy jazz music and a breeze this is so dumb

I do hate the forced love interests in all these movies it’s always like Some Hot Girl Is There And They Get It On!

like he really had chemistry with eve and banter but here it kinda feels like that wish fulfilment and then the nerd gets the hot chick the end and im saying that as the nerd

it doesn’t help that each movie has a different one who immediately is dropped as if she never existed afterwards

maybe it’s not as bad as I remember but. sigh

my instant impression of her is to not like her sorry nicole :/

she’s just so rude? she’s like. hot (derogatory)

i get there’s gender politics here with like. she’s used to being treated like a piece of meat and generally like, why not reap the benefits when you are going to get the creeps too, but like, also she’s just so unnecessarily rude—I mean rejecting his clumsy flirting is one thing but you know—ok I won’t even get into that the point is I just don’t really like her that much even tho I don’t think she’s necessarily a bad person or anything you know

but to be fair I think she got better and I remember her being compelling in her return to the show

and like. I do like how the trend in this franchise is “smart little nerd librarian and badass lady guardian kicks ass” but I do wish that it turned around occasionally. we do get cassandra but like. more lady librarians

wow an air marshal? aren’t they rarely even on flights?

sorry im being nitpicky there for sure lmao. please delete the cinamasins ding my words probably summoned from your brain

I get why shoving him out was necessary but also Wow

Gjklhkjfgh imagine sitting next to some mumbling nerd the whole flight and then you see him fly past the windows

LFKGJDLKJDFG he brilliantly lowers our expectations then jumps without a chute! remarkable!

hilarious or commentary on men getting credit for womens’ competency? why not both

i really thought that she was going to be a lying liar the first time I watched this

ah naïve boy. “uh that’s against the law”

flynn’s greatest strength isn’t just his knowledge but his like. breadth of different topics, just like, passion for learning of any time, and like. the ability to not just know a lot of different things but cross-reference and apply them to each other and use them in tandem to understand a greater whole

and we love that for him!

ah flynn therapizing himself lmao

why would she take him going “this bridge is rotting and physically cant support our weight” as a challenge

or him being cowardly like THE STRUCTURAL SUPPORTS ARE ROTTING

YEAH WHAT DID YOU EXPECT OF COURSE HE FUCKING FELL

ok i lied i like nicole i just don’t love their dynamic

i get what they’re going for i just. not my thing

like with eve there was still a clear mutual respect? i guess? idk

maybe it’s just because i’m more sensitive to mean banter? i don’t like mean banter, even when it’s like, def 100 percent well meaning and not mean spirited and no one is actually offended or hurt

although despite not liking their Thing I do a) think it’s very cute how he looks at her, b) their vibe as they start to get to know each other is Better, c) the end of the movie scene where she rides in for maximum drama? now that was good shit.

oh he’s sherlocking her in a shy attempt to impress her but it’s only going to piss her off, right?

oh she’s just sherlocking him back

KSGFJLDKFGJ LMAO “nerd” and that’s it. fair

Cutting Off His Head damn that’s hardcore

hmmmm cringe,

and more cringe

and cringe.

her waking up to him gone right after telling that story about waking up to her librarian gone and then killed—oof

love the serpent brotherhood lady being like wow!! he’s SO COMPETENT!! (cuts to him screaming)

do these ancient traps just have infinite arrows?

also I do love the whole waltzing across trope what can I say im a sucker

DFLKGLDKFGJLDKJG fucking CHUCKS SOMETHING AT IT and immediately where he would be standing is crushed by a huge rock amazing

he literally just chucked a rock at it and it fell over

ah the classic “let the hero get it for us” move

oh there he is! rip

why does he look like macpherson

not really but kind of

also contrast between the lady always being like “omg the librarian is so smart” and him assuming nicole is the one who did the smart thing

“your tears were perfect” how much more of an asshole can you get

They really could have played him as more sympathetic—“oh, we’re always around these powerful artifacts but we never use them for good! I had to do it, I was sick of sitting back and doing nothing” or like “all those years of danger and guarding powerful things and what good did it ever do me? what do I get for my service?” or anything but nah hes just like “mm power good babes. anyway I love sex and being mean”

to be fair flynn he was the librarian too—a real librarian? I mean yeah edward was corrupted and ultimately failed his duties but he had to have been qualified and actually got the job for a reason

flynn I know you think you sound badass but you really don’t

god not shangri-la again. everything the show did with that was. Bad. yikes

why is—god, I should really learn her name [checks notes] lana fangirling so much?

also following the lamia tradition of “serpent brotherhood second in command who is more interesting than the main evil white guy and also a pretty woc” huh

never got like “this is literally impossible” “well do it or I [generic bad guy threat]” like usually that means nothing lmao

LDFKGJLDKFJLDKFGJ ok first of all god is me? bitch?

second of all. me in english? on this fucking ancient very much not english thing? I mean I guess a) it might not be literal, even though he did say “m, e” by letters, b) it is a christian myth so maybe planted later??? but like?????

dude. giving the super powerful artifact to your prisoner? bad idea. if you’re worried about booby traps have a minion do it.

oh yes your gun is so scary in the face of a temple collapsing

why do heroes always think the whatever is safer with them than the temple that’s guarded it for a thousand years

I get it’s been discovered but like. fuck. still

You Are Going To Crash This Helicopter

SLKGJ HORRIBLE HIGH VELOCITY PIE OF DEATH

flynn and judson…..wholesome

oh here comes more forced romance

just let them be friends who grow to mutually respect each other blease

it is very fucking funny that the mom is like ….. oh my god…. oh my god,,, a WOMAN AJUST ANSEWREDM Y SDONGS PHONE?????????OH MY GOFD?????

he is bisexual. but it’s good he’s getting out

ah floofy hair

cahooting,

Yes You Do Need Clothes

that’s a teleporter sir

god eddie wild is such a boring fucking villain and person

and his plan SUCKS

also the serpent brotherhood (why BROTHERhood?) sucks and hates the library why would they just let this guy, a librarian, literally be their new leader

wow he just stabbed a guy on his OWN TEAM for no reason

great going asshole

love how lana is just like…. O-O

we stan lana. she hasn’t done much and she’s technically a bad guy i just love her

“at last we can be one” what does that even mean

why would lana or any of them want to help him he just killed one of their own for no reason hes clearly tripping on power and leaving yall to die

lfkgjdlkfgj flynn dodging so hard while the others is fight and then PUNCHING A GUY

dfglkjdflgkj wait it’s the professor dude why is that so funny

is he WITH THEM??? I think I just missed something

hold on a sec

yeah I think he just appears??? And flynn just fucking broke his nose iconic

wait so was he with them or is he just here going WHY ARE THERE RANDOM PEOPLE IN MY PYRAMID????????????

oh right he built the—ok I got it

Wait what

I mean I did think lana was neat and she seemed impressed with flynn but what shes just like, in love with him now? that makes zero fucking sense why would she want them to Be Together

Is it just so there can be a catfight between the two hot chicks?

seriously tho? morally pure blonde blue eyed girl versus Evil Asian Chick? really?

for the record NOT THAT IT MATTERS but lana is way cuter im just saying

ah badass judson

THE COMEDY OF THE CAPSTONE CRUSHING HIM DLFKGJDLKFGJ

oh………….pulling out excalibur…. predicable but so good

oh the painting….the very Parenty way of revealing it…… wholesome

oh did NOT like that transition

oh here comes the badass fucking entrance with his gf busting in on his mom trying to set him up with girls

HER ENTRANCE IS SO UNNECESSARAILY DRAMATIC I LOVE THEM

I just love the mom’s face ldfkgjldfkgjdlkfgjdlkfjgd shes like WHAT THEGUFVCJK

again I don’t love the vibes of “oh my weird loser son is finally normal!” but to be fair im exaggerating a bit from just facial expressions it’s just. sigh

but ngl the vindication of him being able to be like. yeah that’s right im a badass now and my gf is cool as fuck is still good

him and nicole do have not terrible vibes at the end but if I remember correctly that mission (time travelling ninjas and hg wells’s time machine) is the one that separated them so rip I guess

overall: good movie! as cringe as I remember but I still love flynn so much

#flynn carsen #the librarian: quest for the spear #going to bed now. perhaps the others tomorrow

6 notes · View notes

waveypedia · 4 years

Text

complete and utter chaos [ducktales group chat fic] - Chapter 3

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Ao3 Chapter 4

let kids be kids

6:04 am

TheWebbedWonder: hey guess what

adefinitelyrealboy: Isn’t it before the approved technology time set by Mr. Uncle Donald?

TheWebbedWonder: brilliance waits for no rule, Boyd!

adefinitelyrealboy: Okay!!

Junior-Woodchuck74: you’re corrupting him, webs.

Lou: eh let her

TheWebbedWonder: whatever

TheWebbedWonder: it’s been a while since we had a sleepover…

lenaonme: oh yeah!!!

ICanDeweyIt: and Boyd’s never been to one!!

adefinitelyrealboy: you’re right!!

adefinitelyrealboy: what does one do at a sleepover?

TheWebbedWonder: They’re super fun!!!

TheWebbedWonder: we watch movies and have pillow fights and discover family mysteries and summon supernatural creatures and fight said supernatural creatures and eat lots of junk food!!!!!

adefinitelyrealboy: Sounds fun!!!

Lou: lmao i love our family

ICanDeweyIt: @Violet-Sabrewing you up? Important convos happening here

Violet-Sabrewing: I am now

lenaonme: vi you’re not fooling anyone

lenaonme: we all know you get up at sunrise

Lou: yeah she’s crazy

Violet-Sabrewing: True, but I was reading.

Junior-Woodchuck74: fair!

lenaonme: omg nerds

TheWebbedWonder: Ok so are we on??

TheWebbedWonder: what about Friday night?

ICanDeweyIt: what’s happening on Friday night?

TheWebbedWonder: it’s the two thousandth anniversary of the Magical Battle of Demogogorna!!!!

Lou: ok hear me out

Lou: can we PLEASE have a sleepover that doesn’t consist of crazy dangerous magical shenanigans for once

Lou: I just wanna sit on the couch and watch scary movies

Junior-Woodchuck74: you do that every day anyways

Lou: yeah but I watch other stuff like Ottoman Empire

Lou: there’s a difference, hubert!!

Junior-Woodchuck74: whatever

Violet-Sabrewing: Thursday night works for Lena and I, but we should check with the adults.

TheWebbedWonder: yeah I’ll ask them when it’s okay for us to be texting

Lou: lmao what a rebel

Family Group Chat!!!!

7:00 am

TheWebbedWonder: good morning everyone!!

mutant-krill!!!!: good morning Little Della!!

Blathering-Blatherskite: gm!!!

TheWebbedWonder: exciting things are happening

Adventure-Pilot: ooh like adventure exciting?

Adventure-Pilot: are you planning an adventure?

TheWebbedWonder: no but I am now!!!

green-sharpie: oh boy

TheWebbedWonder: @Tea Time @aw-phooey @Adventure-Pilot @Scrooge-McDuck @Indy_Sabrewing @purpleisforthegays @dr. mad scientist CAN WE HAVE A SLEEPOVER???????????

Tea Time: At McDuck Manor, I presume?

TheWebbedWonder: yes!

Adventure-Pilot: fine by me!

Scrooge-McDuck: aye, as long as you don’t trash my house again.

Tea Time: It’s not like you were the one cleaning up, sir.

green-sharpie: It wasn’t us!! The ghost Webby, Lena, and Violet summoned had no sense of hygiene.

dr. mad scientist: why did you tag me

TheWebbedWonder: Boyd!!

dr. mad scientist: blathering blatherskite

adefinitelyrealboy: <3

aw-phooey: Webster.

TheWebbedWonder: yes, Uncle Donald?

aw-phooey: it’s 7 am.

TheWebbedWonder: actually, it’s 7:03 am now!

aw-phooey: Webby, you and the kids can’t have planned a sleepover in three minutes

aw-phooey: I told you guys no phones before 7 am!!

green-sharpie: you couldn’t have waited ten minutes webs?

TheWebbedWonder: brilliance waits for no rule!!

aw-phooey: but it does wait for parental punishments

TheWebbedWonder: Oh I almost forgot

TheWebbedWonder added DosCaballero and blackmagica

aw-phooey: !!!

aw-phooey: THE BOYS

blackmagica: WE’RE THREE CABALLEROS

DosCaballero: THREE GAY CABALLEROS

aw-phooey: WE’RE HAPPY AMIGOS

blackmagica: NO MATTER WHERE HE GOES

DosCaballero: THE ONE TWO AND THREE GOES

aw-phooey: WE’RE ALWAYS TOGETHER

green-sharpie: …

aw-phooey: but Webs you’re still in trouble you can’t distract me with my boys

ICanDeweyIt: i thought we were your boys

aw-phooey: you are

aw-phooey: you’re all my boys

Junior-Woodchuck74: 💖💖

Scrooge-McDuck: @blackmagica NO MAGIC IN MY HOUSE

TheWebbedWonder: …

Violet-Sabrewing: …

lenaonme: …

Scrooge-McDuck: okay point taken

Scrooge-McDuck: NO BLACK MAGIC IN MY HOUSE UNLESS YOU’RE BRINGING MY NIECE BACK FROM THE SHADOW REALM

lenaonme: Aww im your niece?

Scrooge-McDuck: yes lass

lenaonme: sldfkdskla;sdlfkhdksl;asldkfhgbfkdl;s

moonlander-general: you worry me.

lenaonme: awww penny you charmer you!!!

moonlander-general: …

Scrooge-McDuck: @blackmagica change. your. name.

green-sharpie: good job using internet speak Uncle Scrooge!!

Scrooge-McDuck: I still only vaguely only know what that means.

Scrooge-McDuck: But I picked up many various languages adventuring. I’m a polyglot!! What’s one more?

TheCrashiestCrash: Good for you Mr. McDee!! Glad you finally found the courage to come out. Love who you love!!!!

Adventure-Pilot: wh

lenaonme: SKDFGHDSKALDKFHDKS

lenaonme: LAUNCHPAD ILY NEVER CHANGE 💖💖

TheCrashiestCrash: okay!!

Scrooge-McDuck: ah, his heart’s in the right place.

Scrooge-McDuck: wait, finally???

green-sharpie: yeah i think webby infested launchpad with the scrooge theory bug

TheWebbedWonder: you make it sound like it’s a bad thing

Scrooge-McDuck: oh curse me kilts

Scrooge-McDuck: I’ve never really felt the need you young people need to label things…

TheWebbedWonder: THEORY CONFIRMED

TheWebbedWonder: thanks uncle scrooge!!

Scrooge-McDuck: ah you’re welcome lass?

Lucky-Gander: haha same Uncle McDunkle!!

Scrooge-McDuck: tattle me tartan, I’m like you!!

Lucky-Gander: lucky you! The Gladstone life is pretty sweet if I do say so myself

green-sharpie: eh he’s not wrong

Scrooge-McDuck: I cannot believe a member of my own family would say something so heartless!!

aw-phooey: oh shoot did i miss the scrooge roasting session

Scrooge-McDuck: Please. I can handle a little heckling!!

Adventure-Pilot: where were you Don?

aw-phooey: in PMs with Zé and Chito.

TheWebbedWonder: those nicknames are so cute omg 🥺

DosCaballero: I am very cute, thank you!!

mutant-krill!!!!: Why don’t Donnie’s and José’s nicknames correlate with yours?

green-sharpie: yeah that’s kinda mean Uncle Donald

green-sharpie: abandoning your friends’ beautifully compatible nicknames

lenaonme: huh cold

lenaonme: i didn’t know you had it in you. I’m impressed uncle d

aw-phooey: oh kids

DosCaballero: Do not worry! Donald didn’t abandon us!

aw-phooey: mine used to but I changed it when the band broke up. too dangerous to keep it ngl

aw-phooey: (you should really change your name, chito)

blackmagica: And I had… other activities that required my attention.

Scrooge-McDuck: You lose more and more of my favor by the minute.

aw-phooey: my friend had your favor?? You’ve gone soft, old man.

blackmagica: Well I have a brilliant idea to appease everyone!!

blackmagica changed their name to TrêsCaballero

aw-phooey changed their name to UnoCaballero

UnoCaballero: how’s that?

DosCaballero: !!!!!! <3

TrêsCaballero: We love you too.

Junior-Woodchuck74: awww!!!

dr. mad scientist: spare me.

Blathering-Blatherskite: Gyro play nice

Adventure-Pilot: yeah Gyro!!!

dr. mad scientist: oh my god shut up.

TrêsCaballero: I did not mean to offend you, Dr. Mad Scientist!!

green-sharpie: he really said duckscord user dr. mad scientist

moonlander-general: But we’re not using duckscord?

ICanDeweyIt: it’s a joke Penny

ICanDeweyIt: wait do you have duckscord???

moonlander-general: Della made me set it up

ICanDeweyIt: FRIEND ME

ICanDeweyIt: I CRAVE VALIDATION

green-sharpie: we know

ihaveahead!!!: we know

lenaonme: we know

Junior-Woodchuck74: we know

Tea Time: we know

ICanDeweyIt: fine :( be like that

TheWebbedWonder: It’s because we love you 💖

ICanDeweyIt: sldkfghdks Webs how dare

ICanDeweyIt: ily2

ICanDeweyIt: IM GOING IN KIDS CHAT WHERE WEBBY LOVES ME

ICanDeweyIt: LET THE WORLD BURN

Blathering-Blatherskite: ...what???

Scrooge-McDuck: leave it, he’s being dramatic

let kids be kids

10:02 am

ICanDeweyIt: >:(

Junior-Woodchuck74: dewey are you done moping

ICanDeweyIt: give me one minute

Junior-Woodchuck74: ...fine.

10:03 am

ICanDeweyIt: okay i’m back

Lou: smh

TheWebbedWonder: PARTY PLANNING TIME

TheWebbedWonder: what snacks do we want? Granny’s gonna do a grocery run soon

ICanDeweyIt: cheeto puffs

ICanDeweyIt: because SOMEONE ate them all

Lou: hey, don’t look at me! The rats love fake cheese dust!!

ICanDeweyIt: Beakley did her weekly rat clean the day before they went missing

Lou: ugh okay fine they’re good okay????

Lou: shut up

Junior-Woodchuck: also, HEALTHY snacks!

lenaonme: lame

Lou: seconded

ICanDeweyIt: thirded

Junior-Woodchuck74: Viiiii back me up here

Violet-Sabrewing: I look forward to eating an ungodly amount of junk food and having an impressive sugar crash with the rest of you.

Junior-Woodchuck74: dangit

Junior-Woodchuck74: webby?

TheWebbedWonder: SUGAAAAAAAAR

Junior-Woodchuck74: Beakley never let you near anything sugary so fair enough

Lou: I mean that was for good reason

Lou: she’s almost as bad as you hue

TheWebbedWonder: SUGAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAR

Junior-Woodchuck74: oh boy

Junior-Woodchuck74: Boyd?

adefinitelyrealboy: Getting ice cream with you in Tokyolk was fun, Huey! Let’s do it again at the sleepover!

Junior-Woodchuck74: dangit i’m soft

Junior-Woodchuck74: please put some healthy snacks down there anyway Webby. At least for me.

TheWebbedWonder: already done!!

Junior-Woodchuck74: <3

lenaonme: do Vi and I need to bring anything over aside from the usual?

TheWebbedWonder: idk yet

adefinitelyrealboy: what’s the usual?

Junior-Woodchuck74: we have sleeping bags and pillows but if you want your own you can bring it. Same with plushies and stuffed animals. Toothbrush and hairbrush and that kind of toiletries, but I don’t know how much you use. Your phone, obviously, and anything else you’ll want for the night. But we have a lot of supplies.

adefinitelyrealboy: okay!

adefinitelyrealboy: I don’t have a lot of personal items like that. Most of what I have at the Drakes is just hand-me-downs from Doofus

lenaonme: get in loser we’re going shopping

lenaonme: for personal trinkets for you

ICanDeweyIt: omg <3

ICanDeweyIt: lena you’re my new favorite person

lenaonme: as I should be

adefinitelyrealboy: That’s sweet! Dr. Gearloose and Lil’ Bulb I have been doing that periodically, though. Sometimes Mr. Manny the Headless Manhorse and Dr. Crackshell-Cabrera come along too!!

Lou: I really want to know what’s up with Fenton’s invalid doctorate ngl

Violet-Sabrewing: Me too

Junior-Woodchuck74: 👀 good to know

lenaonme: don’t overanalyze anything hue

TheWebbedWonder: but overanalyzing is the BEST!!

lenaonme: okay you’re the only valid overanalyzer Webs

TheWebbedWonder: 💖💖💖

TheWebbedWonder: Lena and Violet can you come over on Tuesday to help me set up the magical activities?

Lou: oh boy

Violet-Sabrewing: I’ll ask

lenaonme: do you need us to smuggle in anything again?

TheWebbedWonder: no that’s okay! I still have all the books you brought last time, and I think I can get any herbs we need for spells without suspicion as long as it’s not too close to the sleepover date

lenaonme: 👍

Lou: well I staunchly refuse to participate in any more magical adventures than I need to. Tuesday I have a date with some Pep and Ottoman Empire!!

Junior-Woodchuck74: ugh.

TheWebbedWonder: You don’t have to! This is a strictly Team Magic adventure!!

ICanDeweyIt: aw man :(

TheWebbedWonder: uhh that’s okay Dewey you can come if you want!!

ICanDeweyIt: eh it’s all right I just want validation

lenaonme: understandable. see you tuesday!

ICanDeweyIt: 💙💙

Team Uncle McDunkle (les parentals)

10:43 am

Indy_Sabrewing: Violet just asked if she and Lena can go over to McDuck Manor on Tuesday to prepare for the sleepover with Webby

purpleisforthegays: fine w/ me

acepilot: us too

22: so we’re all good with the sleepover at large, correct?

Dadnald: Aside from the fact that the kids were obviously planning it in their own group chat before the agreed tech time minimum

Moneybags: ah let them

Moneybags: they’re just excited

Dadnald: Unca it’s the first day of that rule

22: I agree with Donald. It’s good to lay down a solid foundation for rules. Let the children know we will enforce them.

acepilot: okay but I vote we still let them have their sleepover. It is Boyd’s first sleepover. Excuse me, important life milestones happening here!!

Dadnald: okay fair

Dadnald: It’s been approximately two weeks since we all met Boyd and Della’s already imprinting on him

acepilot: like you’re not

Dadnald: shhhhh

Dadnald: you’re right about the sleepover. I don’t want to take that away, and they all seem so excited.

Dadnald: let me figure out something else though, at least for my kids

Indy_Sabrewing: we’ll do it together

purpleisforthegays: Any adventures between now and the sleepover, Mr. McDuck?

Moneybags: just a small day trip to the Sands of Time on Wednesday. should be an easy one.

Dadnald: I think we should just assign them extra chores until then

22: fine by me.

acepilot: hahah same

Moneybags: Gyro?

worldsgreatestinventor: I don’t think I have that kind of relationship with Boyd yet, to be completely honest.

worldsgreatestinventor: but it’s fine he’s a good kid

acepilot: oh I know

Dadnald: I’m picking up Huey and Boyd from their Junior Woodchuck meeting tomorrow; I can talk to the Drakes then

Moneybags: good thinking Donald!

Moneybags: you’ll get there, Gyro

PM between Junior-Woodchuck74 and TotallyNotGizmoduck

11:47 am

Junior-Woodchuck74: Boyd says you’ve been shopping with him and Dr. Gearloose!!

TotallyNotGizmoduck: yeah!! It was an infallible excuse to get Gyro out of the lab

TotallyNotGizmoduck: He really cares for Boyd.

Junior-Woodchuck74: And Boyd really cares for him!

TotallyNotGizmoduck: I can see that! Boyd is a sweet kid.

TotallyNotGizmoduck: I just wish Gyro would realize that. For a genius, he can be surprisingly dense.

Junior-Woodchuck74: he’s not the only one

TotallyNotGizmoduck: Oh cease whatever scheme you’re planning and help me figure out how to make Gyro overcome his anxieties about parenthood!!

Junior-Woodchuck74: oh I’m down

Junior-Woodchuck74: I’m not dropping this, but I’m down

TotallyNotGizmoduck: I expected nothing less. Now, any brilliant ideas? Come on brain, think!

Junior-Woodchuck74: I think Boyd would be overjoyed to receive parental affection from Gyro. He doesn’t need any meddling; it’s just Gyro

TotallyNotGizmoduck: True

TotallyNotGizmoduck: I believe Gyro’s mostly scared, but he’ll never admit it. Least of all to himself.

TotallyNotGizmoduck: Also, the Drakes are two experienced parents with a stable, large home and income. They have an unending amount of time to spend with their children, and they easily fit society’s heteronormative mold of the perfect nuclear family.

TotallyNotGizmoduck: they’re everything Gyro is not, and that intimidates him.

Junior-Woodchuck74: The Drakes spent the majority of their parenthood enslaved in their own home and terrified of their son. They’re not exactly the pinnacle of perfect parenthood.

TotallyNotGizmoduck: ha, nice alliteration.

Junior-Woodchuck74: thanks!

TotallyNotGizmoduck: However, I’m not the one you need to convince here. You’re preaching to the choir.

Junior-Woodchuck74: Fair.

Junior-Woodchuck74: Let me ask Webby; she probably has some convoluted scheme to get Dr. Gearloose and Boyd to be a family.

TotallyNotGizmoduck: That makes sense

TotallyNotGizmoduck: I don’t know her very well, but she’s a sweet kid.

Junior-Woodchuck74: she scares you, doesn’t she.

TotallyNotGizmoduck: Oh she totally scares me

Family Group Chat!!!!

2:03 pm

UnoCaballero: @DosCaballero @TrêsCaballero you know what time it is

UnoCaballero: We’re three caballeros

DosCaballero: Three gay caballeros

TrêsCaballero: They say we are birds of a feather!!

UnoCaballero: We’re happy amigos

DosCaballero: No matter where he goes

TrêsCaballero: The one

UnoCaballero: Two

DosCaballero: And three

TrêsCaballero: goes, we’re always together

UnoCaballero: We’re

DosCaballero: Three

TrêsCaballero: Caballeros

ICanDeweyIt: I can’t believe the adults did a songchain before we did

lenaonme: oh shoot we gotta do one now

TheWebbedWonder: what song should we do?

green-sharpie: CREEPER

ICanDeweyIt: aww man

Junior-Woodchuck74: aww man

Junior-Woodchuck74: darn it

lenaonme: so we back in the mine

Violet-Sabrewing: swinging our pickaxe from side to side

green-sharpie: side side to side

lenaonme: This task a grueling one,

ICanDeweyIt: Hope to find some diamonds tonight, night, night

TheWebbedWonder: diamonds tonight

Blathering-Blatherskite: Heads up, you hear a sound,

Junior-Woodchuck74: FENTON

lenaonme: omg another meme child rises

green-sharpie: not exactly a child skdfhdksla

dr. mad scientist: are we done fangirling yet

Junior-Woodchuck74: not all of us are girls, Dr. Gearloose.

Junior-Woodchuck74: That only perpetuates the ingrained societal mindset that liking something is cringey, and girls are cringey and inferior because they’re tied to that negative connotation

lenaonme: go off

TheWebbedWonder: ^^^^

wreathedingold: Well said!!

Junior-Woodchuck74: Dang I think that’s the first thing Aunt Goldie’s ever said to me 😳

wreathedingold: I’m not your aunt kid

TheWebbedWonder: just you wait

wreathedingold: well that’s ominous

wreathedingold: time for me to bounce then

TheWebbedWonder: Noooo Aunt Goldie come back!!!

ICanDeweyIt: Don’t worry Webs, we’ll get her soon enough.

Scrooge-McDuck: Should I be worried or…?

TheWebbedWonder: nah everything’ll be just fine Uncle Scrooge!!

dr. mad scientist: RED NEPHEW.

dr. mad scientist: STOP SPAMMING MY PMS.

dr. mad scientist: one more message and I block you, capishe?

UnoCaballero: You can’t block Huey for emergency purposes

Junior-Woodchuck74: I’m just making sure you get the message Dr. Gearloose

dr. mad scientist: okay okay

dr. mad scientist: it was more of a drag against Fenton anyway

Blathering-Blatherskite: hey!!

TheCrashiestCrash: nooo, we love you fenton!!

Junior-Woodchuck74: yesss Fenton positivity hours!!

Ihaveahead!!!: Fenton positivity hours!!

mutant-krill!!!!: Fenton positivity hours!!

TheCrashiestCrash: Fenton positivity hours!!

TheWebbedWonder: Fenton positivity hours!!

UnoCaballero: Fenton positivity hours!!

moonlander-general: well that’s creepy.

ghostbutler: it’s best not to question their antics.

Tea Time: Oh dear, Duckworth is making logical sense! He’s been replaced by a fake!

ghostbutler: You wish.

ICanDeweyIt: LONG LIVE THE HIVEMIND

lenaonme: Fenton positivity hours!!

DosCaballero: Fenton positivity hours!!

Violet-Sabrewing: Fenton positivity hours!!

Lucky-Gander: Fenton positivity hours!!

purpleisforthegays: Fenton positivity hours!!

adefinitelyrealboy: Fenton positivity hours!!

Lil’ Bulb: Fenton positivity hours!!

Blathering-Blatherskite: <3 <3

dr. mad scientist: betrayed by my own inventions…

Lil’ Bulb: ily2

dr. mad scientist: which one of you kids taught him that

Junior-Woodchuck74: dewey

lenaonme: dewey

green-sharpie: dewey

ICanDeweyIt: oh shut up

ICanDeweyIt: I’m not sorry

Violet-Sabrewing: as you should be

ICanDeweyIt: and I would’ve gotten away with it if not for you meddling kids!!!

Lucky-Gander: haha

Adventure-Pilot: lol

UnoCaballero: sdfghgfds

lenaonme: dewey getting that Adult Validation

ICanDeweyIt: it do be like that 😌

ICanDeweyIt: anyway back to the song chain!!

ICanDeweyIt: yall adults are welcome to join us just don’t mess it up

Lucky-Gander: wouldn’t dream of it

lenaonme: creeper

ICanDeweyIt: aww man

Junior-Woodchuck74: that’s not where we were in the song

ICanDeweyIt: AWW MAN

Violet-Sabrewing: So we back in the mine

TheWebbedWonder: rocking our pickaxe from side to side

UnoCaballero: side side to side

green-sharpie: This task a grueling one

TheCrashiestCrash: Hoping to find some diamonds tonight

DosCaballero: night night

Blathering-Blatherskite: Diamonds tonight

Violet-Sabrewing: heads up

purpleisforthegays: you hear a sound

lenaonme: turn around and look up

Lil’ Bulb: total shock fills your body

TheWebbedWonder: Oh no it’s you again

Junior-Woodchuck74: I could never forget those eyes, eyes

TrêsCaballero: eyes eyes eyes

ihaveahead!!!: cause baby tonight

ICanDeweyIt: DISCORD

green-sharpie: The creeper's trying to steal all our stuff again,

ICanDeweyIt: IM HOWLING AT THE MOON

lenaonme: SLEEPING IN THE MIDDLE OF A SUMMER AFTERNOON

Junior-Woodchuck74: dewey i hate you

ICanDeweyIt: can’t help it i’m a wild child

Junior-Woodchuck74: last week you cried because the supermarket was all out of blue rock candy

ICanDeweyIt: WILD CHILD, HUBERT

Junior-Woodchuck74: IT’S JUST SUGAR AND FOOD COLORING

ICanDeweyIt: SHUT UP IT’S GOOD

lenaonme: ok shut up nerds hash it out later we’re going back to singing

lenaonme: DISCOOOOORD

green-sharpie: whatever did we do

dr. mad scientist: is this the hecking mlp song

Adventure-Pilot: hah hecking

dr. mad scientist: DONALD EDITS MY TEXTS

UnoCaballero: as i should

UnoCaballero: don’t swear around my kids

TheCrashiestCrash: TO MAKE YOU TAKE OUR WORLD AWAAAAAAAAY

TheWebbedWonder: Discord, are we your prey alone

TrêsCaballero: or are we just a stepping stone to taking back the throne

Blathering-Blatherskite: Discord

Violet-Sabrewing: We won’t take it anymore

DosCaballero: So take your tyranny away!

purpleisforthegays: discoooooooooord…

Junior-Woodchuck74: discoooooooooord…

green-sharpie: discoooooooooord…

moonlander-general: wha

ICanDeweyIt: shh penny we’re singing

adefinitelyrealboy: this is quite an interesting phenomenon!!

mutant-krill!!!!: agreed, it is quite fascinating!!

green-sharpie: OH SHOOT BOYD DOESN’T KNOW ANY MEME SONGS

lenaonme: 😔😔👊

ICanDeweyIt: YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS

TheWebbedWonder: I’m adding it to the sleepover agenda now!!

Violet-Sabrewing: Della and Penumbra should join us, since they don’t know either

Junior-Woodchuck74: good idea! but what about Uncle Indy and Uncle Scrooge? And Dr. Gearloose?

Blathering-Blatherskite: Gyro knows meme songs he’s just not participating out of spite

dr. mad scientist: shut up fenton

Violet-Sabrewing: there’s no hope for them

wreathedingold: HAH

TheWebbedWonder: oh Aunt Goldie!! I thought you left!!

wreathedingold: shush pink niece

TheWebbedWonder: omg she knows who i am 🥺💚❤️🥰

green-sharpie: uhh not quite webs

Scrooge-McDuck: Excuse me!

Scrooge-McDuck: we had this conversation earlier today. I am a polyglot.

TheCrashiestCrash: And I told you Mr. McDee!! Love who you love!!

Scrooge-McDuck: Oh tatter me tartan.

wreathedingold: quite the enthusiastic brood you have there, Scroogey!

Scrooge-McDuck: I can’t believe this.

Indy_Sabrewing: That’s it Violet; no reading for fun.

Violet-Sabrewing: No!

lenaonme: 😔👊

TheWebbedWonder: Oh no!!!

Junior-Woodchuck74: We should invite Uncle Fethry too, if he can make it

mutant-krill!!!!: my schedule is full of traveling the seas with Mitzy and cataloguing our scientific findings and experiences!!

mutant-krill!!!!: But I will check.

adefinitelyrealboy: I can hardly wait!!

Tea Time: And when is this?

ICanDeweyIt: Well we were planning on showing Boyd at the sleepover, but it seems my dear class has grown…

ICanDeweyIt: PROFESSOR DEWFORD RISES

Junior-Woodchuck74: @Tea Time Wednesday will work.

Tea Time: Wonderful. I’ll mark it in the family calendar.

lenaonme: mrs beakley ily

Tea Time: Thank you, Lena.

ICanDeweyIt: P R O F E S S O R D E W F O R D

green-sharpie: oh boy

Junior-Woodchuck74: you don’t have a Ph.D idiot

ICanDeweyIt: Neither does Fenton but do you see that stopping him?

Blathering-Blatherskite: why must you keep bringing up my lack of a doctorate?

lenaonme: it’s funny

green-sharpie: yeah pretty much

green-sharpie: you know we’re only going to bring it up more now right?

Blathering-Blatherskite: oh blathering blatherskite

Blathering-Blatherskite: What has my life come to? I’m being mercilessly mocked by a bunch of children.

dr. mad scientist: HAH

Tea Time: That’s just what children are like.

lenaonme: mrs beakley says this as if she doesn’t tease everyone mercilessly too

Tea Time: That goes without saying.

Lil’ Bulb: it do be like that 😔👊

dr. mad scientist: OH COME ON

dr. mad scientist: WHICH ONE OF YOU TAUGHT HIM THAT

Lucky-Gander: dude you literally just had this conversation

dr. mad scientist: I’LL KILL YOU KIDS

UnoCaballero: NO

Adventure-Pilot: I’LL KILL YOU FIRST

ihaveahead!!!: i dont doubt that

dr. mad scientist: WHOSE SIDE ARE YOU ON MANNY

ihaveahead!!!: della’s

dr. mad scientist: typical.

lenaonme: nearlythrewhandswitha13yearold.png

Violet-Sabrewing: yes pretty much

TheWebbedWonder: sldkfhdskl;a

Blathering-Blatherskite: oh how the tables have turned

dr. mad scientist: i hate you all

Adventure-Pilot: we love you too mwah <3 <3

dr. mad scientist: ewww

TheWebbedWonder: commence operation: SMOTHER DR. GEARLOOSE IN LOVE AND AFFECTION

Adventure-Pilot: HECK YEAH

Blathering-Blatherskite: Sounds like an interesting scheme with a potentially volatile reaction from the subject, but with likely a desired outcome!!!

TheWebbedWonder: aw thanks Fenton <3

Blathering-Blatherskite: anytime!!

lenaonme: lol get him

dr. mad scientist: I TRUSTED YOU WEBBIGAIL

TheWebbedWonder: THIS IS FOR YOUR OWN GOOD

TheWebbedWonder: TIME TO HEAD OVER TO THE LAB EVERYONE

dr. mad scientist: no

TheCrashiestCrash: I’ll drive!!

dr. mad scientist: NO

dr. mad scientist: FENTON STOP THEM

Blathering-Blatherskite: :3

ICanDeweyIt: S’DLFKDSL;KDKFHSKLASKEISKAGSKASKD

dr. mad scientist: YOU WILL DIE PAINFULLY

TrêsCaballero: This chat is… interesting

ICanDeweyIt: Get used to it Uncle José!!!

TrêsCaballero: I am… Uncle José?

TrêsCaballero: What an honor!!

ICanDeweyIt: sure you are!! you’re close enough to uncle donald

TheWebbedWonder: and we love you!!!

ICanDeweyIt: yeah and that

UnoCaballero: awww kids

TrêsCaballero: you must meet my biological nephews, Zico and Zeca!!

TheWebbedWonder: NEW FRIENDS!!!

Junior-Woodchuck74: Uncle Scrooge

Scrooge-McDuck: Yes Huey?

Junior-Woodchuck74: On an unrelated note, can we take an adventure in Brazil?

TrêsCaballero: 🥰🥰

Scrooge-McDuck: ugh

Scrooge-McDuck: I’ll look into it

TheWebbedWonder: I’ll help you Uncle Scrooge!!

Indy_Sabrewing: Is this the adventure you promised Della?

TheWebbedWonder: Nope!! My lips are sealed on that one

lenaonme: huh you’re actually doing that

TheWebbedWonder: Yep!! And it’s gonna be amazing!!

Adventure-Pilot: I bet!!

TheWebbedWonder: 💕💕💕

TheWebbedWonder: I love you!!!

Adventure-Pilot: aww I love you too honey!!

DosCaballero: Not to interrupt this adorable declaration of love but

green-sharpie: you’re an uncle too

DosCaballero: !!!!!

UnoCaballero: I’m proud of you guys

purpleisforthegays: are you talking to your friends or to the kids?

UnoCaballero: up for interpretation

PM between Junior-Woodchuck74 and TotallyNotGizmoduck

4:35 pm

TotallyNotGizmoduck: Huey

Junior-Woodchuck74: Yes Fenton?

TotallyNotGizmoduck: I scrolled up in the major group chat and your uncle said something odd about his nickname

Junior-Woodchuck74: Wait, why were you scrolling up in chat?

TotallyNotGizmoduck: Manny and Lil’ Bulb roped me into taking out of context screenshots.

Junior-Woodchuck74: Oh hey Dewey and Lena do that too!!

Junior-Woodchuck74: What did you find?

TotallyNotGizmoduck: screenshot-2020-08-06-4.24-PM

[aw-phooey: mine used to but I changed it when the band broke up. too dangerous to keep it ngl]

TotallyNotGizmoduck: Why would it be too dangerous for him to keep his Three Caballeros nickname?

Junior-Woodchuck74: Yeah that’s definitely weird

Junior-Woodchuck74: Especially since Uncle Donald’s account is private

TotallyNotGizmoduck: this chat service only has basic security. It is easily hacked if someone has the means.

Junior-Woodchuck74: That means they’d have to want to find Uncle Donald

Junior-Woodchuck74: Fenton I’m scared for Uncle Donald now

TotallyNotGizmoduck: I’m sure he’s okay! He knows how to protect himself, if nothing else.

Junior-Woodchuck74: true

TotallyNotGizmoduck: Besides, you have me, a literal superhero, on your side if anything goes wrong!!

TotallyNotGizmoduck: and your family is exceptionally good at fighting off threats. You’ll be okay, Huey.

Junior-Woodchuck74: i’m not worried for me

Junior-Woodchuck74: but thanks, Fenton

Junior-Woodchuck74: i think i’m gonna sleep on this and then do some DuckDuckGo searches on the Three Caballeros tomorrow, okay?

TotallyNotGizmoduck: Of course, Huey

Junior-Woodchuck74: talk tomorrow?

TotallyNotGizmoduck: wouldn’t miss it!!

Junior-Woodchuck74: and you should really change your name

TotallyNotGizmoduck: I will

PM between TheWebbedWonder and TotallyNotGizmoduck

7:43 pm

TheWebbedWonder: Hi Fenton!!

TotallyNotGizmoduck: Hello Webby!!

TheWebbedWonder: I realized I never added your mother to our group chatTheWebbedWonder: Can I have her username?

TotallyNotGizmoduck: Of course! I figured something was up

TotallyNotGizmoduck: Not that you can’t contact me casually!!

TheWebbedWonder: I’ll keep that in mind! 💖

TheWebbedWonder: Your mom is really nice but I don’t know her that well

TotallyNotGizmoduck: Oh you two will definitely get along

TotallyNotGizmoduck: There is a 93% chance of it

TotallyNotGizmoduck: The 7% is if she catches wind of the illegal activities Lena drags you into

TheWebbedWonder: It was ONE time and that guy deserved it!! It was justice!!!

TotallyNotGizmoduck: Webby, you set a citizen’s apartment ablaze!!!

TheWebbedWonder: He was being a jerk

TheWebbedWonder: He purposefully misgendered Dewey and Violet

TheWebbedWonder: and he made some really gross comments about Lena

TotallyNotGizmoduck: Webby, I understand that

TotallyNotGizmoduck: M’ma and I have to deal with our fair share of jerks

TotallyNotGizmoduck: And in all honesty, she would probably respect the karma of your actions. I definitely do.

TheWebbedWonder: yeah I get it

TotallyNotGizmoduck: I became a superhero to help people

TotallyNotGizmoduck: And that person deserved what came to them, but sometimes there are better ways to help people

TheWebbedWonder: sure okay

TheWebbedWonder: I mean you should probably give Lena the lecture

TotallyNotGizmoduck: I’ll keep that in mind

TotallyNotGizmoduck: but you’re a good kid webby

TheWebbedWonder: awww thanks 💖💖

TotallyNotGizmoduck: You and M’ma will get along

TotallyNotGizmoduck: You’re both kind, powerful, passionate women who scare me

TheWebbedWonder: Aww, I scare you? That’s so sweet!!! Thank you!!!

TotallyNotGizmoduck: Uhhh you’re welcome?

TheWebbedWonder: 🥰🥰

let kids be kids

8:03 pm

TheWebbedWonder: Fenton is lecturing me about when we set that guy’s house on fire

lenaonme: hah that was awesome

Lou: ew lectures

Junior-Woodchuck74: I told you that was a bad idea

Violet-Sabrewing: It worked out, though

TheWebbedWonder: he’s so nice but also I want to set all bigots’ houses on fire

ICanDeweyIt: as you should

Violet-Sabrewing: *as WE should

ICanDeweyIt: you’re right vi!!!

lenaonme: *cracks knuckles* aight i got this

TheWebbedWonder: wait no lena don’t be mean

lenaonme: shhh it’s just a little bit of good-natured teasing

TheWebbedWonder: Lena

Junior-Woodchuck74: Lena

Violet-Sabrewing: Lena

adefinitelyrealboy: Don’t be mean to Dr. Crackshell-Cabrera!! He has to deal with a lot of their comments anyway. And he’s a superhero!! He knows what he’s doing!!!

Violet-Sabrewing: Fenton is a superhero?

lenaonme: khdskalksdf HE’S gizmoduck????

Junior-Woodchuck74: oh no

Violet-Sabrewing: I did think of this hypothesis a couple months ago

adefinitelyrealboy: Oh no!! I didn’t mean to reveal Dr. Crackshell-Cabrera’s secret identity!!

ICanDeweyIt: not much of a secret tbh. he has a whole journal entry for people who know he’s Gizmoduck

TheWebbedWonder: Guess he has two more names to add to that list

Lou: to be fair, his username is TotallyNotGizmoduck. That’s pretty sus

Junior-Woodchuck74: he really needs to change that.

ICanDeweyIt: yeah

PM between lenaonme and TotallyNotGizmoduck

8:24 pm

lenaonme: ay yo

TotallyNotGizmoduck: Hi, Lena!

lenaonme: be gay do crime

TotallyNotGizmoduck: Lena no

lenaonme: lena yes

TotallyNotGizmoduck: I suppose Webby talked to you?

lenaonme: yes

lenaonme: also vi and i know your secret identity now

TotallyNotGizmoduck: darn it

lenaonme: seriously change your name that’s kind of pathetic ngl

TotallyNotGizmoduck: I understand you like fitting the image of “rebellious teenager” and all, but are the insults completely necessary?

lenaonme: oh thank webby she convinced me to only lightly tease you

lenaonme: it’s with love~ 💖

TotallyNotGizmoduck: Not quite sure if I buy that

TotallyNotGizmoduck: I don’t want to have to apprehend you if you commit crimes, Lena

TotallyNotGizmoduck: and my M’ma wouldn’t either

lenaonme: i don’t even know her

TotallyNotGizmoduck: You will tomorrow!!

lenaonme: i can’t decide if that’s ominous or just overly preppy

TotallyNotGizmoduck: I’m just a little excited

lenaonme: lmao lame

TotallyNotGizmoduck: :(

TotallyNotGizmoduck: I hate teenagers

lenaonme: blanket statement huh

TotallyNotGizmoduck: sorry

TotallyNotGizmoduck: I wouldn't be forced into negative feelings if you weren't mean to me!

lenaonme: it's because i love you

TotallyNotGizmoduck: you keep saying that, but I'm not so sure I believe it...

Science Gays

8:48 pm

fentonium: why are kids like this

worldsgreatestinventor: agreed, very negative feelings indeed

adefinitelyrealboy: :(

worldsgreatestinventor: except for you Boyd

Junior-Woodchuck74: It’s because we love you

adefinitelyrealboy: what about Huey?

worldsgreatestinventor: ehhhhhhh

Junior-Woodchuck74: disappointed but not surprised

Junior-Woodchuck74: let me guess you talked to Lena?

fentonium: yes

worldsgreatestinvention: she’s cool

worldsgreatestinvention: she taught me memes

worldsgreatestinventor: WHAT

worldsgreatestinventor: red nephew!! your lot told me that was dewey!!

worldsgreatestinvention: just for those specific memes

worldsgreatestinvention: it was a group effort

Headless-Mannyhorse: good for them

worldsgreatestinventor: they will rue the day!!

fentonium: oookaay

fentonium: you know what I prefer Lena to this

Junior-Woodchuck74: she knows

fentonium: oh no

Junior-Woodchuck74: that’s one of the reasons she likes it so much

fentonium: oh no

Family Group Chat!!!!

4:55 am

lenaonme: b͈̻̙͕̲̭ͦͦ̾͛l͉͒a̱̳̠̳͈͎̖̓ͪc̆͒k͎͖͈͓̎̌͒p̝͈̌ͫͥͦi̩͙͙͕ͫ̋͛ň̦̌k̟͐̾ ̟̼̥͎ͣͫ͛̂i̞͓̰̜͇̜̪ͧ͑͌̓s̙ͤ͛ͩ ̩̞̖͖̺̐̈͋͆́̈́ͅt̙̥̄ͨͭ͐h̩͇̮̙̬̉͂ͫe͕͚̳̩̞͚̜ ̞͕̰̇͛̏̍ͨ̄r͉̹̱̬͑̄̾͐ḛ͖̘̇̆v̺̱̇̽͒o̤̮̤l̞̯̪̳͕̿͆͌ͭͅu̮̼̝̤̅̑ͬ̾͑͂̍t͇̲̺̘̀i̘ͦ̿͗o̪ͣ͐̓̇ͦ̎ͬn͙̱͔̩͙͒́̋̽̎̎~

dr. mad scientist: oh my god shut up

Huey: Junior-Woodchuck74 Dewey: ICanDeweyIt Louie: Lou / green-sharpie* Webby: TheWebbedWonder / Ultimate_Scrooge_Fangirl* Donald: aw-phooey* / Dadnald / UnoCaballero Scrooge: Scrooge-McDuck* / Moneybags Della: worldsgreatestadventurer* / Adventure-Pilot / universesgreatestadventurer /acepilot Beakley: 22 / Tea Time Launchpad: TheCrashiestCrash Lena: lenaonme Violet: Violet-Sabrewing Duckworth: ghostbutler Gyro: worldsgreatestinventor* / dr mad scientist / wildlymisunderstood Fenton: TotallyNotGizmoduck* / Blathering-Blatherskite Manny: ihaveahead!!! Lil' Bulb: worldsgreatestinvention* / Lil' Bulb Gladstone: Lucky-Gander Fethry: mutant-krill!!!! Indy: Indy_Sabrewing Ty: purpleisforthegays Goldie: Wine-Aunt* / wreathedingold Penny: moonlander-general Boyd: adefinitelyrealboy Panchito: DosCaballero José: blackmagica* / TrêsCaballero

*main

i listened to a bunch of various blackpink while making this (on if it's your last rn) so that's why that ending moment is there lmao. it's just a glimpse into my life i guess. it's also a fitting reference since i wrote a bunch of this during a writing sprint with friends (and i lost :( ) and they introduced me to almost all of the blackpink songs i know!

there's a moment in which dewey called himself a "wild child" which is inspired by another friend calling me a wild child the other day. it just be like that i guess. (tragically, neither this friend nor the blackpink friends are into ducktales so they won't read this. but moon, silv, viper, rose, if you're out there... ily)

peep some sexuality headcanons!! I tried not to make them too overwhelming since I know a lot of people have different hcs, but they slipped in. It didn't make it in, but I hc that in addition to the no-label thing for genders, Scrooge is also demisexual and demiromantic!! I'm aroace so that means something to me. Also re: the bigot Webby and Fenton were talking about, I hc Violet is trans and Dewey is nb (thank the duckfalls server for that one). and lena is gay. but all headcanons are cool n valid and i'd love to hear some of yours!!

i unexpectedly got a really good response to this fic last week and i just want to say thank you!! it means so much to me that people like this fic and that people like my writing in general. i love all of you <3 i haven't responded to comments from last week yet cause energy but i promise i will i just need energy. but i read all of them and they were so sweet!! so thank you!!

in a similar vein, no penny pokemon plot this week cause the week slipped by and i forgot to message ppl about pokemon but i definitely will do that. it'll probably be back for next time. thank you so much to everyone who offered!! i'll probably take you guys up on that.

also thanks to the people on tumblr who gave me scrooge phrases. @just-sinag sent me an amazing video of all of scrooge's catchphrases from dt87 (which i didn't get to use this time unfortunately but definitely next time) which was really helpful, but everyone who replied to my post is really awesome and i appreciate it!!

in other news, my cat just meowed at the door while i'm writing this author's note and then jumped very cartoonishly when the door bumped against the wall. she's a little freaked out right now, poor baby. but i love her.

Chapter 4

#ducktales #ducktales 2017 #dt17 #ducktales fanfiction #wavey writes #my fanfic #complete and utter chaos #fenton crackshell-cabrera #huey duck #webby vanderquack #gyro gearloose #della duck #lena sabrewing #violet sabrewing #dewey duck #scrooge mcduck #manny the headless manhorse #jose carioca #panchito pistoles

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