The Calming
No one but myself will know the hurt, anger, and violence it took for me to become the calm and peaceful person I am today.
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Everything in this world costs:
Whether that be time, energy, effort, finances, love, patience or so much more - everything has a cost. Don't go into debt for anyone.
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Love yourself first, for it's the secret to a full heart. From this foundation of self-love, every other love flourishes more beautifully.
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You know what? Fuck you. I'm not gonna be sad or miserable this time just because we won't talk anymore. I don't even care if you hate me or whatever. I'm actually glad we became friends again and now I'm the one dumping you instead of you just stopping texting me one day. I'm done with you. You say you are so mature then why is your only friend a 22 years old girl? I'll tell you why. It's because no one with self respect can tolerate you and I had zero self respect untill yesterday. Now I think I may have some. I deserve more than being treated like that and I feel so free right now. You told me I was smart and I'm making the smart choice right now. I gotta put me first now. And I hope this is just the start of me realizing my own worth. I'm not gonna waste my time with people who make me uncomfortable anymore. I even left the group chat, just like that! After saying that I didn't want others to see that I did. I'm proud of that. I just did that. And I don't care what they might have thought. I've got me. I can still do what we did together on my own. Even better. And without the constant anxiety that you cause me. Just fuck off!!!
✨✨✨ I'M PUTTING ME FIRST 💫✨✨
I'm loving this glow up btw. Just last year when we stopped talking I was sad for days, now I couldn't be happier 🤪
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I always chose you, but you would always choose everyone else. Although that was an undescribable pain it taught me to choose myself, always.
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Heaven is not fit to house a love like you and I
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I’m not an expert, so I may be way off, but I think we all need a vacation sometimes. And when you can’t have one (can’t afford it or whatever), manifest it.
I’ve decided to take 7 days and treat myself in little ways every morning. Yesterday I got a cheap trim in my hair, but I felt lighter after. Today is a coffee date with myself. Both of these things cost between ten and twenty dollars, but I feel more at peace. Calmer. Relaxed.
Did I brush my teeth yesterday or take a shower? No. But today I did and it wasn’t a battle.
Maybe it’s the nice weather for the first time in months, but this feels like a fresh start. I’m embracing this new me. I’m forgiving myself and wiping the slate clean. I can’t wait to see what I do for myself tomorrow.
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