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onlyyourhallucination · 9 months

Note

heeeey if your requests are still open i have one right here but ignored otherwise, it's totally fine!

anyways what if reader is jing yuan's sister? (could be older or younger your choice) who recently found out that she's being courted by none other than imbibitor lunae? would it be easy to get jing yuan's approval or if he would even get an approval at all?

also i have high cloud quintet era in mind when this scenario came up since they're closer friends and allies on that time.

thanks and have a good day!

Assistance

Pairing : Imbibitor Lunae x Reader

A/n : Genuinely, this took me a while to, understand. If this is going for the high quintet era, then it, IL, should be as Dan Feng now is it not, or am I wrong. Anyways, Thank you for requesting though!

As a younger sibling, of a certain young male, Jingyuan. You were so eager to learn how to fight, you have been asking for Jingyuan to teach you how to fight.

Well, he did. But not as much, until a certain man somehow, knew about you wanting to learn about it.

His beautiful long black hair, flows slightly as he watches you swing your weapon. He is very capable to teach you any type of weapon that you wanted to learn, but don't you ever wonder how did he know you wanted to learn how to fight?

And today is the day where the question hits you, you are in the training grounds, with him, he is called as "Dan Feng", his gentle also firm gaze watches you as you train.

You put down your weapon after training for awhile, you sat down under the shades, and Dan Feng approached you, "How are you feeling?" He asked as he offer you a drink, you whispered a thank you as you accepted the drink from him.

"Say, uhm.. Dan Feng Gege," He hummed softly as he stood near you, looking down at you, "How did you, know that," You paused for a moment, "I want to learn how to fight?" He stared at you for a second, he frowns, "Well your brother mentions you multiple times" he replied short, making you stared quite speechless.

"My brother did?" You earned a chuckle from him, "Yes, he did" but before he could continue, a familiar voice appeared in the distance.

"(Y/n)-!" Both of you turn your head towards the owner of the voice, It belongs to Jingyuan, who's now walking towards both of you.

"Dan Feng, why didn't you tell me about this!" He sounded quite disappointed of what's happening, you pondered. Wait, Jingyuan doesn't know Dan Feng trained you?

"Jingyuan, You didn't know?" Both You and Jingyuan had a little quarrel, while Dan Feng at the distance staring at both of you for one moment before trying to separate you both away, "Calm down, It is not (Y/n)'s fault, It is my fault for reaching out to her and teach her without telling you" Dan Feng admitted.

Jingyuan stared at Dan Feng in disbelief, he then sighed softly, "Still... Well, at least I know where and how you got that small scratches" He looked at you and smiled, "Promise me, you won't be too harsh on (Y/n)" Jingyuan said, earning a soft chuckle from Dan Feng, "Of course, don't worry"

"But next time, please tell me about this so that I don't get suspicious on why both of you are gone at a certain hour." Jingyuan massaged the sides of his head, "Sorry.." You apologized.

You didn't know that, Jingyuan didn't know your training with Dan Feng, so it's, not entirely your fault.

So, Dan Feng got a approval from Jingyuan. Though he would appreciate you telling him instead of keeping it a secret.

©onlyyourhallucinations ; do not copy/translate

A/n : I'm sorry it took awhile, I hope you enjoyed the fic! Also, if you said that you have sent a request, then I believe, you're the anon who sent the mute request? Apologies that I cannot fulfill the request since, you sent it when my requests are closed.

( 5/5 )

#honkai star rail x reader #honkai star rail x you #hsr x you #star rail x reader #dan heng #dan heng honkai star rail #dan heng hsr #dan heng x gender neutral reader #dan heng x reader #imbibitor lunae x reader #imbibitor lunae #dan feng

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ndjournal · 8 months

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Possible TW? But dw I don't talk about any specifics/details! Not trauma dumping.

So I like many others came to ND from LOA. I didn't have a ton of success with LOA, a lot of it was in vain (lol) but I did succeed in a 'major' way once, I "shifted realities" using LOA to one where a friend did not leave me on delivered for several days but replied almost immediately after I messaged him. The context is we had a falling out over a year ago and hadn't talked since and I really missed our friendship so much. So after the 'shift' we started talking again and it was really nice. Then I found ND and knew I would one day have to let go of this beloved friendship to realize Self too. Recently he suffered a personal loss and is in the process of grieving. I was really sad for him and let him know he could talk to me whenever and I'd be there for him. That was over a week ago. Then yesterday something bad happened to Vanessa. She could have fought it but she decided not to fight the dream. She surrendered and gave up. It was really unpleasant for her to feel all those feelings but I just observed..

***For clarity: I actually don't recommend just surrendering if your basic safety and wellbeing is at danger, guys. Please do use common sense. I don't entirely agree with ND teachers about surrendering when it comes to this part; literally none of the major ND books address anything about trauma/abuse. In practice, I told ego and body it wasn't real and surrendered but there was still a physiological trauma response that the body had to process, nothing was happening consciously in my mind in terms of thoughts but there were a lot of involuntary physiological responses. yes I was observing but was it necessary to watch the body to suffer immensely? I don't think so. Suffering is unnecessary for self-realization, don't impose that condition on yourself. I'm learning through personal experience to follow my own truth to Self and not just take on everything that the books teach at face value because I don't think some of their advice is all that practical***

Anyway, after what happened, I observed Vanessa and the body was really conflicted in many ways despite trying to distance Self from it. I thought of my good friend who was also suffering on his own and really wanted to reach out to him to check on him. I had held back on this because again, self-realization = letting go and letting things happen in the dream without doing anything? But how can it be wrong to have love for others and extend compassion? Vanessa didn't want to do it to gain anything, she just wanted her friend to be okay. That can never be wrong. I decided that teaching can fuck off in this case, I can do what I want so long I don't forget Self when I act.

So Vanessa reached out to her friend and he was surprisingly really open to her in ways he never was before? Something he never was before and she really appreciated it. Then he suggested catching up?? This is something that she had imagined and wanted to manifest for YEARS. And it just happened just like that? Things just happen on their own when you surrender.. Again guys, I don't recommend doing what I did for that specific scenario (I won't specify what happened). I'm only sharing to show the power of surrendering, I do NOT recommend surrendering in cases where your body's basic safety/needs are in jeopardy, that is unnecessary. PLEASE do not do that. I decided to surrender in that situation but you don't need to be in such a situation to surrender; you can surrender at any time.

Most importantly because of all that happened, I learned to listen to my own Self above any of the books. Fuck what the books/realized masters say if it doesn't sit right with you tbh; Ada said your greatest guru is your own Self and I 100% believe and trust in that above all else now. That would be my greatest advice of all for everyone from this experience. Not all of the teachings are actually practical or compassionate in taking into account any trauma/crisis management. It's fine for your body/mind/ego to protect itself as you observe, just remember you are Self and not what you are observing.

And if anyone's wondering, right now I am still observing my body process everything (mind never identified with it so mind is okay, but body stores trauma (not something I decided lol, just part of the dream) and reacted to it) but I am treating ego and body with gentle kindness and patience. *I* know all is safe, well and okay and we have learned a great lesson so it's all okay. This knowing has actually managed to speed up the healing and I don't think there's any long-lasting trauma effects either (Vanessa has used spiritual healing to help too though).

I used to keep checking for instant materialisation when I first started but I've given that up now lol. That just created too much pressure to realize Self and is backwards to letting go of desires and ego. It'll happen when it happens. Whenever that is. I just know all is perfect right now as I AM and am at peace to just be.

You said this journey isn't linear and that's true. And here's a reminder from Ada: "As long as you don't lose sight of your real self, you're always doing the right thing. When you catch yourself getting too involved with externals, just keep asking yourself ‘To whom it all happens?’. The final destination is the same, and the road there is shorter when you rely on your own inner voice."

So TRUST YOURSELVES ABOVE ALL ELSE, GUYS! And don't pressure your egos by putting time limits/deadlines on it. Just surrender and let go when it's practical and never lose sight of your real self. I'm sharing this in hopes that you learn from my experience and don't need to go through unnecessary suffering just for the sake of realizing Self.

Lots of love to you all <3

Oh anon, I'm so sorry you went through that.. :( but the way you handled everything is amazing and this lesson is so valuable. I absolutely agree with everything you said.

Ada said this to an anon who may have went through something similar:

I'm sorry such a thing happened, please do not allow anyone/anything to make you feel gross about yourself or any of your creations (thoughts/mind/body). Also don't feel like you have to live with that in any way and know you can change/revise it ever happening if it's weighing on your mind, this is your life and it's precious, and so is your body, nothing should happen against your will in your life ever, it is yours and yours alone to experience in the best ways. - 4dbarbie

Everyone please take care! Never take anything you read at face value and use it as a guide only, as a pointer. If something feels wrong, then don't ignore that. Follow and trust your inner voice above all else. Thank you so much for sharing. I'm glad you're safe and okay.

Lots of love <3

#applied #submissions

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hello-nichya-here · 1 year

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Been a long time since I sent an ask but I'm hoping for your forgiveness xD

Anyway, I've been in a Stannis staning mood recently and remembered a theory.

Apparently the reason Stan is popular is because he serves as the replacement Ned Stark due to his strict adherence to honor, law and morality. Any thoughts?

I do see similarities but I've always felt them to be different people. They had respect for each other yes, but were never really friends.

Plus their flaws and shortcomings are different. Ned could have prevented the war by not telling Cersei but he was too merciful of a person for that. Stannis greatest mistakes and vile deeds came almost always when he compromised on his code.

I guess what Game of Thrones teaches is that both good and evil deeds, both selfish and selfless actions can have negative consequences. People don't act in isolation, the results always depend on how other people react.

While they both are characters that fully believe that "What's right is right", the are some key differences between them.

The first and most important one can summed up in an exchange that happened between Davos and Stannis:

"What is the life of one bastard boy against an entire kingdom?"

"Everything."

Ned covered up the truth about Jon being Lyanna's son with Rhaegar, spoke out against the plan to kill Daenerys (who was 14 and pregnant at the time), and refused to just let Cersei's children be executed despite knowing that they were bastards born of incest. All of that was because his honor and his idea of what's right says that protecting the weak and innocent is his obligation - especially if said weak and innocent are children.

Stannis meanwhile was fully ready to kill Dany and Viserys as children, nearly burned Edric Storm alive, and will 100% kill any of Cersei's bastards if he ever comes across them. That is because Stannis's morals are all about the good of the real and the rules of society.

This isn't always bad - he is sexist and racist, but won't allow his men to rape women of the free-folk because to become a rapist is to become a dishonarable man, and he won't tolerate that kind of shit.

But it also means that he is fully okay with Melisandre burning people alive because her God told her to and (more importantly) plenty of said people were enemies of his that were breaking the law by supporting other kings. Why would he have a problem with that? What's the difference between burning people in the name of Rhollor and stabbing a bunch of them to death in the name of the Seven/the king? War is war, and sacrifices have to be made.

Ned meanwhile will NOT accept that kind of thing. He has killed people before, and he WAS willing to let Cersei and her children be executed if she didn't run away with - but he still gave her the warning. He gave them a chance to survive. To end this conflict without anyone's death being necessary. Stannis meanwhile fucked off to prepare for war.

Another key difference between them is that Ned is much more forgiving in general, and especially with the people he cares about. He killed the guy who deserted the Night's Watch, but only because he did not believe his story about the White Walkers attacking them - if he had, the guy would have lived and not suffered any punishment. Ned was also not okay with cheating, excessive drinking, or people neglecting their responsibilities - but he was best friends with Robert, the guy who full on said "Hey, be my Hand, so you can do all the work for me while I eat, fuck and drink."

Can anyone even imagine Stannis Baratheon EVER letting someone get away with saying that kind of crap to him? For fuck's sake, Davos is his best friend AND smuggled food to Stannis in a siege in which he nearly died... and Stannis still cut off Davos's fingers as punishment for the crime of being a smuggler.

We also have the fact that, while Ned didn't really understand the Game Of Thrones. Like, at all. He legit thought Cersei wouldn't stab him in the back after he said "I know about the treason, incest, and I'm also gonna accuse you of murder." Stannis never made that kind of mistake. He despises the empty flattery and courtesies their society relies on, yes, but he always makes sure he has some card up his sleeve that allows him to get away with not enganging on that part of the game.

This also connects to another thing: Stannis changed, Ned did not. Ned Stark died because he could not addapt to the place he was at, not even long enough to just get enough time to go back to Winterfell and leave Robert holding his dick. Stannis meanwhile addmited that Davos and Jon Snow were right - just going "Fuck you, I'm the king, bow to me!" was not working, would likely never work, and if he wanted people to support him, he'd need to change tactics and help them with their problems instead of focusing just on his. He went from the king that even rejected, and who despised his subject, to "the king who cared." Quite the drastic change.

Finally, we also have ANOTHER way in which Stannis changed, and that ties into something he does NOT have in common with Ned: the way they handle being the second son.

Stannis went from sleeping with Melisandre just because it was necessary (both in the sense of "the red God wants it" and "It will kill your rival in a second"), to not so subtly bragging about the fact that she is his mistress and that she scares the fuck out of everyone but is his loyal servent.

This "sudden" change happened because, while Stannis never really asked to be king, he was always the unloved child. The one who was too difficult to deal with. The one who just needed to lighten up a little. The one who didn't have Robert and Renly's charisma. The king NOBODY wanted.

And then here comes Melisandre, telling the is the literal chosen one. The most important man in the whole world. The one who will save everyone and be seen as a legend forever and ever. And he buys into that pleasant lie because it validates all the anger, resentment and loneliness he felt all these years, and tells him "It was not your fault, you were right all along. Everyone else was the problem, not you"

Ned meanwhile, despite loving Catelyn and the life they had together, would often get all melancolic over the fact that he was not supposed to be the heir, the ruler of Winterfell. And when Robert comes in offering to give him MORE power, MORE responsibility, MORE of a great status, he fucking hates it. Unlike Stannis, Ned doesn't resent the time he spent in his brother's shadow as the "least important one." He seems to miss it and the safety it brought to him.

Which is why he often refused to play the game, unlike Stannis. Playing is the only way to have even a CHANCE of winning. And when you play the game of thrones, you win or you die.

#asks #ned stark meta #stannis baratheon meta #ned stark #stannis baratheon

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nonokoko13 · 3 years

Text

Child!reader being adopted by spy x family characters Pt. 2

As I said in the previous part, these adoption headcanons are really specific, including your hypothetical pronouns and name; these two are extra so you can imagine yourself with your name and desired gender. You can ask for less specific headcanons if you want too. Part 1 here

Enjoy!

Sylvia Sherwood

How you met

She carries the responsibility of WISE, she needs to be committed to it. More than ever now that the peace was threatened every day by those who wanted war to arise again

She missed her family, but she overcame it. Just like the HQ she had to be impenetrable

At least, that's what she thought

Because right in front of her there was the question which answers she wanted to hear. A kid.

It would be normal to see one if she wasn't at the HQ

It didn't help no one knew there was a kid there until you spoke up

The camera system didn't record you and there wasn't any entrance to the agency that had been forced. You weren't any employee's kid either

After scolding them and order to search your parents she met you again

"Hello little one. May I ask you how did you get in here?"

You smiled, seeming to have been waiting her to ask

"Because I like to play and explore! And I'm really good at hide and seek"

Sylvia raised an eyebrow. No matter how well someone was good at hiding there was no way you could break into the HQ; it sounded surrealistic

"But how did you find this place?"

"Because it was easy to find"

"Don't you think you could end bad breaking into unknown places?"

"If I don't know what isthis place how I'd know that?"

Fair enough

That conversation wasn't going anywhere, yet she was angrier with the security staff than you. You didn't look worried though

You gave her an idea

"Do you want to play with me?"

Both entered in the nearest police station, she talked with the officers before telling you to count until 1000 while she was going to hide. You started the count facing a wall

She felt bad, but there were some traffickers she had to catch before they made the exchange

She was following their car; everything fine until she believed to see a small hand greeting her from the car's trunk

She returned to the police station to find out that moments later of her departure you disappeared without anyone realizing. She went to the point where the delivery would be made

Outside the abandoned warehouse there was no signal that you were there until she saw you getting out from under the car on the other side

Something caused a shooting that would make the police come and caught her at any moment. The bands kept shooting at each other while you were behind a transport container

"What were you thinking?! I told you to stay with the police!"

"I'm sorry, I counted until I know, then I saw you following the car, so I followed too. But before they caught me I hid in there...I'm sorry..." You pulled out a walkie-talkie

"I got two from the police station. I left one in there so the others thought the guys of that car were betraying them, it should have worked to scape with no bad guys seeing us"

She was impressed. However, there was no time to ask where you learn that from

Analyzing the situation the principal scape was blocked, fortunately they hadn't noticed you yet so–

You pulled her shirt, pointing somewhere else

"Let's get out"

General headcanons

Sylvia was still surprised that your plan of exiting through a rear window she hadn't seen and walk away without hurry could work

She stopped walking to watch you smash the walkie-talkie and take out some matches to burn it

"Now they can't find footprints!"

The police may not get answers about it but she had many questions for you

She lied to you about the HQ, after the shooting her lie was on the floor. Thenceforth Sylvia's not able to tell if you were playing along and keeping her secret or you have no idea what's all about

You thought her name was Handler. When you knew she was called Sylvia Sherwood you pointed your hoody logo and say "S of Super, you're superman–Superwoman!"

That's how she begun to be mistaken with an endearing mother and her son. She was superwoman and you "kid", because you said that's how you were called, along with child, shrimp, demon...

"That's unacceptable". She handed you lists of names to choose, unfortunately no one convinced you

It wasn't until you two went to a jewelry store that you found the name

The casual way you break in HQ when you want still frustrates her, how do you do it?? You don't see big deal though

Fullmetal lady didn't remember how tough was motherhood

Anyone would freak out if they found out about spies. Yet there you are, admiring flying guys in underpants

Sylvia asked you about your family, but you always tell the same: you lived with dad until he left you with a woman that he said was your mom

The Handler found out your father is a repeat offender, currently on a maximum security prison in another country. Both him and the woman without offspring legally

"Please, don't tell me one of his criminal records is jailbreaking"

The informant doubted "Actually, that's the main one"

"..."

The Forgers

Scenario where it's up to both of them to adopt you. To keep Loid's mental sanity safe it will be independent of the timeline where Yor has a kid on her own, feel free to imagine both kids being Anya's siblings at the same time. You can ask me to include that idea if I write more about this

How you met

As I said before Twilight wouldn't adopt anyone due his job, only one kid for Operation Strix and that was Anya. For now Yor didn't want more kids, she loves Anya and that's enough for them

Not for Anya. She wanted a little sibling

All started talking with Becky when Damian mentioned his brother. Back at home she brought the topic and neither Pa or Ma were giving her an answer of where babies come from

That's when she begun to feel like being a sister. Any plan helped her to convince her parents though

Anya remembered something Mr Henderson told them. "If you want something, take it into your own hands"

And she took it too seriously

Next day Anya and Bond disappeared, she was in the dogs park with Yor

While Mrs Forger panicked Anya had returned to the place she met Twilight

As the time passed the Forgers worried more. When they found Anya and Bond at their building's door they felt relieved

Your presence didn't make things better

They asked Anya where she had been and where did you come from. She said she adopted you

Of course Anya wasn't going to say she broke into an orphanage and took you

Loid's scolding made you cry

"Anya, we aren't adopting–"

"If she's not my sister I won't go to school ever again!!"

"Just for a trial period" that's what Loid hoped

General headcanons

Loid thought babies were easy because it's unnecessary (more impossible) communication with a living being that can't talk; after all babies only have basic needs. He was wrong

It would be easier if you could talk. Why are you crying? You have eaten! Are you sad? Cold? You dislike him?

Yor is not better either. Because her parents died when Yuri was a kid Yor didn't have experience with changing diapers, or anything related with babies

She was more scared than Loid to the point she didn't want to hold you. She broke Yuri's ribs with a hug when he was a toddler, what if she kills you with few contact?

In less than 24 hours you already had a crib and all kinds of things a baby would need. However, having three bedrooms and parents sleeping in separate rooms meant all your things ended in Anya's room

You cried at night until they discovered you calmed down when Anya let you a plushie to hug

She can't wait for the day pa and ma share bed to take back her bedroom

The second night Anya had an idea

Ma is scared of being your mom, solution? Leave you in her bed while Yor is asleep imagining that would work

Thanks God Yor doesn't move much when sleeping. On the other hand Yor is a light sleeper due not being used to sleep with someone so she woke up minutes later

She almost jump out of the bed, realizing that would make you cry made her contain. You groaned, did she wake you up? Yor wasn't sure of holding you, instead she laid down again and approached you to her chest

Seeing you so peaceful by her side melted her, thinking about it you looked a bit like her and Loid.. She blushed at the embarrassing thought

Bold of them to not imagine that's why Anya chose you

In the morning Loid discovered what happened and had a little words with Anya during breakfast before she went to school

Yor went to work and he decided to take a day off from his work to spend the morning with you. The Handler said the first days you should see them to recognize faces

Walks with Bond, buying toys, trying to teach you sign language...Normal stuff

Loid is glad you don't do anything but sleep and eat, except your obsession with munching. When you first kissed Yor he found it normal until you munched her cheek and now you do that to everyone; probably you're teething

Yor found it really cute, but you shouldn't go kissing and chewing cheeks. Anya thinks is funny just don't try to chew her hair again please

Another problem came with names. Loid was going through a list of 850 names in alphabetical order, meanings included; Yor didn't take it to the extreme

"Hum, what about Rose? I think it's a cute name, I mean it's both decision and I'm not good with names Loid–"

Welcome to the family Rose

A spy, an assassin, a telepath and... Well, a baby. Seems like a good mix

Yor Briar

As we know Twilight only would adopt for Operation Strix's sake. Yor became mother by marrying Loid, but what if she had already a kid before being Mrs Forger?

Inspired by this post of @say-seira

How you met

Long ago before Twilight adopted the identity of Loid Forger, the Briars moved to a flat in Berlint

While the eldest sibling had recently become an adult Yuri was only a kid, Yor decided to move to the city so he had nearer his school. It was possible due her proper salary as Thorn Princess

This change would make her job easier too. She had a new client which death could pay Yuri's entrance to a good university

There was a politician who negotiated with terrorists, helping them to get into Ostania and providing them with weapons in exchange to gain good propaganda abroad and getting rid of competition

Knowing this was enough to make Yor's blood boil. He deserved to die, she was sure of it

Struggling with the security around him, Yor finally killed the target without leaving trace

The only inconvenience was a bad injury made by a bullet that she received. After removing the bullet the wound got worse

She went to the hospital to avoid an infection. In the waiting room she met a kind lady, Yor swore that she had seen her before

The woman was scared, but Yor reassured her she will wait her

While Yor was attended the girl was taken to another room. As she promised, Yor waited in the hall after her wound was treated; with a buttoned medical gown on because she didn't want to attract more attention due the bandaged wound in sight

Time passed and many people enter and exit from the room, but she didn't. A nurse carrying something mistook her for one of the staff and scolded her for standing there

"Here, take the baby to the nursery"

"Me? But— wait! What about the woman? Is she okay?"

From afar she heard the answer, but before Yor could explain the error the woman had left. She was shocked, how? She seemed fine

Against her will the dark-haired looked at the lump she was holding: rosy cheeks babbling in dreams, you were in peace

Her shock grew when she saw you shared the username that the man she killed had. That's why the woman was familiar: she was the politician's daughter

Yor searched someone who hand the baby when she recognized the doctor that guided the woman to the room, he was talking with a masked nurse

The fact they went to a private place and maintained their voices low made her suspect

"Did you take care of the mother?" the nurse asked

"Yes, they got ahead of us with her father but I think they will pay us anyway. When they found it was a medical negligence we'll be far from here"

Yor understood they were assassins as well, probably paid by a rival. Luckily they hadn't seen her yet

"Heh, do you they will pay more if we got rid of the baby?"

Yor left the hospital with you, unsure of what to do. Did you have more relatives? The widowed politician didn't have more kids, and your mother came alone. What if they wanted to kill the rest of the family?

A small hand grabbed hers, and every fear disappeared. Looking at each other, she knew you were safer with her. Perhaps it was only guilt or sympathy, but she would try

General headcanons

The moment Yuri saw Yor holding you was in disbelief. Yor said she found you in the streets and he believed it

At first he tried to convince her sister to leave you in a orphanage but once scolding was enough to cease

Still disliking you for the first months. It took some time until he saw you like one of his family

Yuri helped, although they had a rough time because you refused to eat Yor's purees. Your endurance might grew up to make you the only person who can eat her food without bleeding but it doesn't mean you like its flavor

She viewed you as a sibling until you were two, being called mom made Yor too happy to correct you. Yuri was just Yuri, you never feel like using formalities with him or addressing "Uncle" everytime you talked

Yor decided to let your belongings, it was better that way. When you were older, and only if you wanted, she would tell you the truth

She's bad with names, Rose was the only name she could think of but you're a boy. Yor's parents loved that Yuri and her had matching names, therefore you would be the sweet addition to it

The only name I could think of is Yuu because it's gender neutral and means "you" sorry

During the first year of your life she didn't try to hide the blood of her clothes from you. Yuri never suspected either and you wouldn't remember it when you grow up

Your lack of childhood amnesia was something she didn't have in count. Not that she knows you know anyway

Yor has been training you since you were able to walk, if she wasn't there when you needed at least you would be ready to defend yourself. Proud to say you're her strong boy

That said, if the assassins that tried to killed you found were you lived it's something you ignore. Being the protective mother Yor is they could be dead by now

Six years later, it was still Yor and you against the world, with Yuri being the only paternal figure you had. Before one day she met a man and everything changed

She said he will help her by accompanying her to a party so Yuri stopped worrying about her. She said it would be one night, and the next morning you woke up with Yor waiting to talk with you

In part she accepted because of you; you passed the Eden exam before knowing you needed a dad for it. That requisite seemed stupid for you, as you reassured her you could go to any other school; now you would be accepted into the best school!

You agreed and started packing. What else you could do? The decision was made before you were asked anyway, and you didn't want to argue with your mom because she was doing it for your future too

Of course it affected you. No matter how nice they were it was a huge change; in one day you had to move to a new place which didn't feel like home and live with strangers who you'll have to share mom with isn't easy

Anya was nervous too, but for different reasons. She was so excited to meet her soon-to-be sibling! For her, who was an orphan last week, having a pa, a ma and a friend to play with was great

Her expectations went down when she read your mind. You didn't think bad of them, but excited wasn't the word to describe your emotional state either

Loid may not be good at understanding children, but it was clear for him you wasn't comfortable. For him would be weirder if you didn't seem affected at all

On the contrary, Yor seemed cool with all of this to you. Even without any idea of how to be a wife or mother for Anya she enjoyed her time as Forger, which confused you a bit

Yor is happier, not only because she didn't have to worry about the SSS or Yuri anymore. They make her happier, it's just matter of time she could fall for Loid and have a baby that was her own, real kid

Being sure Yor loves you and your new family want you to feel welcomed doesn't make disappear the feelings you carry with. Still, if mom is happy you prefer to keep it to yourself and try to maker her smile too

If it wasn't because Yuri hates the idea of her sister hiding her marriage for a year and sympathized your situation he would have laughed at the irony when you told him during your uncle-nephew walk the next day of his meeting with "Loiloi"

He doesn't know they got married before you attended school so he assumed you had been holding it for a long time. He passed his fingers through your hair

"I understand it's difficult, but I'll be for you whenever you need me"

+ Honorable mention to compensate you for the mild ansgt without warning

Daybreak

We don't know much about him but I included this dork for fun

Thinking about "Daybreak" and "parenthood" makes anyone's mind stopped working

Mainly because it's difficult to say which one would be the child

Not "How you met headcanons" because he wouldn't be able to adopt to begin with

From what we saw in chapter 27 he seems to live alone, depending on his amazing spy career to afford pork steak for dinner. So he must not live too good given that after his first mission he was fired

If he had a child, it would be likely because of a previous relationship he had and didn't end well

He didn't adopt you. You're his biological kid, the only not adopted of this gang

Sorry we can't choose our family good luck ig

Not necessarily ended bad, even remaining as friends, your mother took a different path and is happily married with another man

If she knew he wanted to be a spy either thought "it's a joke" or *sigh*

She was who brought money in the relationship, now you live with her and your step-dad but at the beginning you didn't want to

Daybreak talked with you and promised you could visit each other and even live with him when he could afford it

They don't get it

Who would take care of him? The idea of living on his own was frightening to you

Imagine being father and is your kid who worries about whether pops know how to pay taxes without mom

You took after him in terms of appearance. Any signal of intelligence was from your mother

Average smart but surely smarter than him

Probably he thanked God that you were a boy. He will love whatever you are but he was relieved of saving himself of buying female products when you were on that time of the month and guide you through puberty

As much as he says to be a charming man he's not good with women either so

Your name is Sunny. Guess who chose it

Probably you see him more on weekends than during the week

Until you showed him Spy Wars he didn't have no idea that existed such good series

Of course not cooler than the legend he is but Daybreak jokes about how reading that and seeing your cool pops in action would make you half as good spy as he is someday

Quite sad is that your common sense along with the things you see on TV are enough to be better spy material

You try to watch it with him to see if he learns something

Unsure of what you'll be in the future but in the mean time you had fun watching cartoons and liking kids stuff like dinosaurs and skateboard

Current status: Busy with your first year at school and getting him out of trouble

#spy x family #sxf headcanons #sylvia sherwood #the handler #loid forger #yor forger #anya forger #yor briar #thorn princess #daybreak #child!reader

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silverrstarrr · 3 years

Text

Headcanons of Eren with a Black s/o!🍡

(Happy black history month babes! Remember blm isn't just in this month but all year long :p)

‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿

• You guys most likely met in your high school years.

• I feel as if Eren would stare a lot at you during freshman year. Not in a bad way but in a Curious/adoring way. I mean all his friends are white lmao💀

• He probably approached you during a class period you guys have together.

• I don't think he would be ignorant? But he'll most likely ask to touch your hair.

• Maybe you have braids, locs, or passion twist or your natural curls out/4c Afro—doesn't matter, he'll ask to touch your hair.

• Of course you can decline and tell him no, he won't really fuss over it. He'll even apologize.

• But trust me, he's going to keep staring 😭 he thinks you're really pretty, don't worry ;)

• He won't care about your Skintone/shade, lightskin, brownskin, dark-skinned. He likes them all, I don't see Eren ever have a preference in girls in general.

• Whoever he likes, he likes.

• You guys hit it off in your freshman year.

• He'll ask a lot of questions about you and your culture and your hair

"Hey, why do you wear braids??"

"Is your hair really this long? Wow 😁"

• PLEASE LMAO, I TAKE THESE AS AN INSULT BUT I KNOW HE'S JUST HE CURIOUS 😭

• You'll have to explain to him about your hair.

• You guys most likely snapped and he sent a streak of him getting out the shower and his hair is wet.

• You'll go on about how you can't wash your hair everyday, that you have a certain wash day and his reaction is like "😲"

• Poor baby is like "woooow" and ever since then, he's been hook up to learn about your lifestyle, your family, cookouts, etc. He just wants to know you.

• He calls you pretty a lot.

• Not in a flirtatious way just because he thinks YOURE really pretttyyyy. He's just stating the obvious queen🙄❗

• He offered to go to the Beauty supply store once or twice to buy your weave/pick out the next color. Or he'll just accompany you.

• Also would pick out your next nail color, maybe hairstyle.

• He doesn't care if you wear lakefront, wigs, braids, or natural. He believes they're all beautiful. Plus he understands that our hair need protective hairstyles and can't really, yjehehejehwhww iykyk.

• During BHM, he would do the mossstt.😭

• He'll buy you food and buy you hairproducts.

• He'll constantly post about African American stories on his social media.

• Talked Armin into making a poem about discrimination and racism then made him read out loud to you in the hallway😭

• Would buy a BLM shirts for him Mikasa and Armin.

"Look y/n! We're supporting your people. Remember we're on your side. BLM!!"

• IM CRACKLING TOO MUCH LMAOOOO.

• Don't worry, he's has the right attitude but mann💀

• Depends on the type of person you are: you probably confronted them and told them to relax. Or, you dealt with it and the embarrassment 😭

• You most likely ask him for Reparations 🙄❗🤞

• He deadass would give you them.

• He'll be confused at first and probably wouldn't even understand the word 💀

• But he'll give you money though LMAO.

This was 15 year old Eren, moving on to when he's older.

‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿

• You guys are older. You've been introduced to the rest of his friend squad. Jean, Connie, Marco, sasha etc.

• Jean most definitely thinks you're pretty and fell for you at first sight. Eren didn't like this at all.

• Eren never really understood why he didn't like it when Jean played in your braids. Eren then started to purposely make you lay between his legs so he play with your braids before Jean could.

• They probably reacted the same as Eren about regarding your hair.

• Eren would take it upon himself to explain and even tell them about Lace fronts, sew ins, braids, etc

• He'll probably show off about how much he knows about your hair.

• Eren would ask to help you with your hair.

• He most likely looked up YouTube videos about how to plate hair or how to deal with your hair type in general.

• You could probably teach him. He wouldn't understand the first time but with practice, he's pretty good. Not better than you though 🙄🤞❗

• Carries Hair ties, brushes and combs on him just for you.

• You also carry hair ties for him because of his long hair.

• You're the person who even puts his hair into that sexy ahh man bun🤨❗

• Most likely help you on wash day. Massages oil into your scalp.

• Supplies you with hairproducts.

• Likes it when you play in his hair. During PE, you guys would sit on the bench. Him between your thighs relaxing as you caress his hair.

• You guys look so cute and perfect while doing this. Connie and Sasha would always tease you about being Eren's gf.

• Loves your food! Like literally, he's in love with it.

• During the summertime, you invited him to a cookout. A lot of your family members stared at him but you know, they're accepting and gave him some food, chatted him with etc.

• Ever since then, he would always ask your mom to come over for dinner or save him a Plate lmao😭

• Sometimes if you were to cook, he'll be in the kitchen watching you

"Why are you watching me?"

"I wanna watch you so I can learn to cook your food and surprise you one day with it."

"Suurree but you can't out-cook me."

• He'll then smirk and accept that challenge.

‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿

Sorry I just realized I've only been talking about yall friendly part, lemme get into more intimacy 🥲

• He always have his hands on your hips, waist or ass.

• Maybe you're cuddling in the library or something, his hands are on your ass.

• Black women naturally have curvy bodies In my opinion. And curvy can mean thick, skinny or in the middle. They're still curves.

• He loves kissing your lips. Either that or your neck.

• When you're walking together he always have his hand around your waist.

• Eren seems like the type to hug you from behind and kiss the top of your head.

• I dont think he's big on PDA but that doesn't mean he won't do it.

• You're talking to Jean? Wraps his arms around your waist from behind and places his head on your shoulder- kissing your neck.

• If you so happen to have thay dump trunk in the back, he'll always caress it, give it a pat or smack it. But in the most sly way ever.

You're in the hallway, chatting up with Jean. You guys are discussing the topics of what was recently covered in class. Jean cracks a joke about how the teacher was talking and their looks. You laugh at the small insults he was throwing at your professor. Eren recently just left his class a few doors down from where you and Jean was. He notices your long box braids from down the hall and sees a tall male walking alongside with you. Eren quickly caught up with you guys. As he walked passed you, his hands slides over and grabs a good squeeze from your ass. Naturally you wouldn't mind but for some reason you got embarrassed and flustered. Most likely it was because Jean was there. Before you could respond and complain to him, he leans over and places his lips against yours. Obviously, you kiss him back as his free hand grabs your chin, deepening the kiss. It was passionate. The kiss was probably to make up for his sudden actions but it was also because he missed your presence and touch. The way your lips felt against his own, his hands grasping and holding your hips rolled, everything. Jean rolled his eyes,

"Okay lovebirds, I get it." You break away from Eren with a small smile. You turn towards Jean with an apologetic look, since he did just kiss you in the middle of a conversation.

Jean nodded and said his goodbyes, he'll catch up with you another. Watching as his figured faded within the crowd, you turn towards Eren and smack his arm. He let out an "ow" in response.

"Eren, what was that for? I usually don't mind it but we were chatting."

He lets out a soft groan and buries his head into your neck. He released the grip on your rear and just lays it there as his other hand slips down and does the same. You tap his back and he raises his head from it's previous position. You give him a few quick pecks, wrapping your arms around his neck, he quickly to returns the small kissed back. You both smile at one another, letting out a small giggle.

"Its okay baby, I miss you too." You peck his cheek for the last time.

"We can walk home together after school, meet me at my last period class."

Eren face brightens up when you say those words. Mann, this boy was in love. The bell rang and you notice all the kids scrambling to get to class. He releases his arms from you and grabs your hand as you both scurry along to your next period class.

He drops you off and waves at Armin and Marco that happens to be in your last period.

"Remember your promise y/n!!" He said as he walked off to the direction of his class.

You rolled your eyes jokingly and settled in to class.

‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿

Okay bonus:

I feel as if Eren would talk you into making those tik toks that beautiful darkskin/brownskin woman do with makeup and their cute ass hair. Of course you'll end up doing it because he kept hyping yo ass up and wouldn't let it down.

The video actually goes viral and gets a decent 345k likes with 1.1m views. Some of the kids in school came across the video and started chatting up with you. Even some guys you never knew before started to hit you up but Eren gets so Jealous and has you hold his hands always in the halls 😭

Okay thank you loves! Please request/suggest things for him. I don't mind doing one of these for Jean, Connie, etc. Next up are my jjk men 🤨❗

#eren headcanons #eren x reader #eren yeager #eren jeager #eren yeager x reader #eren yeager x you #x reader #attack on titan #aot x black reader #eren x black reader #levi ackerman #eren smut #eren fluff

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elles-writing · 3 years

Text

Enchanted - Fili x fem!reader - Cinderella AU

A/N: I recently seen there was Cinderella (2015) in TV, my favourite Cinderella story! (But they are all kind of smashed together, so🤷‍♀️)

This is mainly for lovely @guardianofrivendell , I hope you will like it!

(Also, c'mon. Kili wouldn't even come here.)

This is different style from what I am writing - this is more a fairytale-telling style, but I tried. I'm quite happy quite the result, so I hope you will like it too!

Once upon a time, there was a lovely, beautiful maiden, named Y/N. Though her life wasn't a fairy tale at first glance, sometimes things change the way it seems like one.

There wasn't a time when Y/N didn't thought about her old life, and when did it changed. But she remembered her mother's last words.

The two things that you truly need in your life, are courage and kindness. Remember that, my dear.

Life with her two step-sisters, who argued almost all the time (except for when there were trying to provoke Y/N), and the evil woman who married her kind and selfless father, was, well, interesting, to say at least. It wasn't very exciting, either - her life was constant routine of doing all the chores, and then falling asleep in her little room.

She dreamed of magic, that would make life exciting, and every night, when she looked up for the stars, she would think about a prince, who would run away with her and never come back.

Little did she knew, her life was about to go into a different direction very, very soon.

The day they got the invitations, her sisters were excstatic. One of them told Y/N to prepare them dresses, along for their mother. Y/N thought it was one of birthday partiest of their many friends, and didn't thought much of it. She spended the whole day by sewing and measuring, cutting and measuring once again.

However, when she decided to take a stroll in the evening void of darkness, soft light was coming out of the post box. She curiously stepped closer, and opened it. Her eyes widened when she noticed envelope in heavy, good quality paper. The name and adress on the letter was in beautiful calligraphy, perfect, as if it was made by...

Y/N shook her head. Don't be naive. But the tiny little spark of hope and child-like wonder in her believed it was something magical about it.

She opened the envelope, and took out an...invitation? She curiously red futher, and her eyes widened. It was an invitation for a ball!

With greatest joy, we are happy to announce that prince Fili is ready to find a wife. In occasion of Prince's birthday, there will be thrown celebration, where is invited every daughter of our beautiful kingdom, who is interested in being Prince's wife.

There was also a date and time. Y/N couldn't believe it. She got her invitation. A dreamy smile stretched across her lips, and she started to dance.

She hid her invitation in the pocket of her dress, and quickly hidded it into the back of her drawer.

When the day of the celebration came up, she realized she forgot to make her own dress. She worked on her sisters' and mother's dresses she didn't got enough time to work on her own.

They left, and she was there alone, in the big house. It used to be place full of joy, but now it was empty and sad. Y/N looked around for some dress she could use or alter, but she wasn't that lucky.

She sat to the garden, and her good friends - three cats, who stayed there, and sometimes slept in her room - came with loud meowing.

As if they could talk. It sounds like they are mad, Y/N thought. One of the cats - black cat with golden orbs - studied her face, as if she wanted to give her piece of her mind. But, instead, she started cleaning her paw.

"No, of course not. They aren't home? Oh, as if that - alright, I won't swear, but that woman living here and making her her maid-" Y/N frowned and stood up, carefully walking into the direction of the voice. She found an old woman, talking to little mouse.

"Good evening, c-can I help you?" The woman turned to her.

"Oh, do you happen to have a piece of bread and some milk, dear?" Y/N nodded, remembering the leftovers from dinner.

"Oh, of course we have. I'll be back in a moment," she said. She knew the woman from somewhere - but where did she knew her from?

When she came back, she gave the piece of bread and cup of milk to her. The old woman thanked her, and ate it as if it would be the most delicious thing she have ever eaten.

"What is happening, Y/N? Why that long face?" Y/N looked up on her, and sighed.

"Do you know about the ball, in palace today?" The woman nodded, and Y/N sighed.

"Well, I got an invitation, but...I don't have any decent dress." The woman let out a humming, deeply in thought.

"Well, perhaps I could help you out," she said. Y/N frowned.

"How?" The woman jumped up.

"Oh, I forgot to introduce myself, my dear. Let me just-" she stood up and all of sudden, there were tiny little sparks, then falling down as a sparkling dust.

Stardust, Y/N thought.

A young woman stood there, in simple dress with flowing skirt, a wand in her hand, and happy smile on her lips.

"I'm your fairy godmother," she introduced herself. Y/N blinked.

"But they don't exist. It's all just a fairytale," she said. Her fairy godmother furrowed her brows.

"Oh, dear! What are you teaching you these days, tsk," she let out and looked around.

"Do you happen to have, uhm, pumpkins?"

"Oh, uhm, yes, we do, over there-" She pointed to the corner of the garden, where a few pumpkins grew. Her fairy gotmother walked there and curiously eyed each one of them. Then, she took one of them.

"This one will do!" Before Y/N could argue, her fairy godmother tapped the pumpkin by the tip of her wand, and stepped aside.

Y/N's eyes widened, as there wasn't a pumpkin anymore, but a beautiful coach instead. Her fairy godmother looked around once again, and spotted the three cats.

"We also need horses, and stagecoach man..." The cats wanted to run away, but it was too late. All of sudden, there were standing three horses. Y/N runned to them.

"James! Oh, look at you!" She turned to face her fairy godmother, wonder in her face.

"How did you-you really are my fairy godmother," Y/N sighed out. Her godmother proudly smiled, and pointed towards a lizard, sitting on edge of fountaine.

"Well, now we also need...lackey!" She looked around, and spotted a bird, who was eating some tiny bits of leftover bread.

"Now, let's go, my friends, we don't have much time left!" She said with a proud smile on her face.

"Let's go dear! It's going to be really fun, I've heard they have chocolate cakes and-" Y/N catched her hand.

"I would love to, but-my dress, it's-" her fairy godmother turned to her and nodded with serious expression.

"Oh, you're right! Hm, yeah, this could work," she said and the tip of her wand created glittering ribbon in the air as she moved her hand. Little sparks danced across her dress, hair and face, and soon, she had dress she would never imagine even in her wildest dreams. Y/N gasped.

"They are beautiful! How did you-how can I thank you?" Her fairy godmother smiled and tapped the tip of her nose by her wand. Little sparkles fell across Y/N's face, and she let out a giggle.

"You, my dear, will have fun. Thanks to this, your mother and sisters won't recognize you," Her smile became a frown as she looked down.

"What about the shoes? You can't wear these!" Y/N looked down and blushed.

"Well, um, alright, but please no heals, I can't walk in them," the girl admitted rather shyly. The godmother thought about it for a moment, and told Y/N to close her eyes. When she was done, she said she can open them. Y/N gasped - they weren't shoes on heals, they were simple and comfortable, but lovely to look at.

"Now, if anyone asks you your name, tell them you're Cinderella. And remember - the spell will wear off exactly at midnight. Then, everything is going to be just like before." She explained carefully while they walked to the coach. When Y/N stepped inside, she noticed the details. It was surely the most gorgeous coach she've ever seen. She looked out of the window and waved farawell to her fairy godmother. The answer were just tiny little sparks.

When she arrived, there was a music playing already, and she could tell the celebration was in full swing. She peeked inside by the corner of one window, and noticed the Prince - he talked to his brother and seemed rather bored and terrified. Y/N giggled at that thought of the Prince being terrified of dancing with all those women and girls, trying to figure out who will be his future wife.

Prince Fili was rather nervous. He wasn't sure if he should be really there - but as much as he wished to be with his horse on a ride through forests and meadows, he also knew he was doing a favour to both the kingdom, and perhaps himself too. His brother found a lady he was happy with on similar celebration, though the other part of the story was she was the only one, who wasn't falling to his feet after he winked at her and said something flirtatious. Now, he was trying to calm Fili down. Or tried, at least.

"Look, Fee, all those ladies are here, so don't worry. There is a big chance you will find one that will like you for you, and you'll like her too."

"Or not. How did you made it last time?" Kili's face scrunched.

"Well, um, tripping over your feet after you've been trying to flirt with her whole evening, and pouring red wine on her light dress isn't the best way to start a courting, if you ask me." Fili chuckled.

"But it worked out."

"Now I'm not sure which one of you is the older one," their mother said and they both turned to her.

"Fili, dear, don't be nervous. Just be yourself. There is no reason to worry. And you," she turned to Kili,

"Try to not walk while you drink wine," Fili chuckled and Kili rolled his eyes.

"Now, the celebration will start soon, so remember what I said," she added and disappeared into crowd to talk to some of the ladies and their mothers personally.

Y/N walked through the palace, and nobody asked her for her name. Everyone was in awe - who was she? Who was the gorgeous princess?

When she walked in, she was making sure she won't trip over her feet. The whole room went quiet, the musicians stopped playing - and one question filled the air.

'Who is she?'

The Prince turned his attention to where everyone looked - and he realized all those surprised gasps and looks of awe were right.

A beautiful maiden, a young woman perhaps, he couldn't tell, stood there, with soft silver - golden dust on her nose and cheeks, creating sparkling freckles, her hair in soft waves falling over her shoulders, her dress looking as if they were made of stardust itself. Her hands were covered in long white gloves, up over her elbows, with little silver flowers around the edge, and soft smile was spreaded across her face. She started slowly walking down the few stairs, hoping she wouldn't trip over her dress.

She was almost there...

It was all quick - she was suddenly falling down, but instead of meeting the floor, she was met with a pair of strong arms, and deep chuckle above her.

"Careful here. The stairs are tricky," He helped her to stand up and her cheeks burned.

"Prince Fili," She said. A smile spreaded across his face.

"At your service, m'lady," He softly kissed the top of her hand, while looking his blue eyes, deep into her eyes.

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Prince Fili," she said with pinkish cheeks. Perhaps the magic gave her courage to say something?

He smiled.

"The pleasure is all mine, my lady. May I ask you for a dance?" She nodded and soon, they were dancing across the dance floor. The music was playing again, and other pairs joined them soon.

"Your dance skills are excellent, my lady."

"You aren't bad yourself," her eyes widened at her sudden courage, but he only laughed.

"Have we met before? I'm sure I'd remembered as good dancer as you, my lady."

"I don't think so, my lord." Fili looked down at her. She was just turning around, as it was another step in the dance.

"Would you tell me your name, m'lady?" He blurted out. He wanted to talk to her whole night. He wasn't interested in all those other women and girls - especially now, when there was her, who he could actually talk to.

"You may call me Cinderella," she said. Fili thought about it. He've never heard this name before, but it was nice to finally adress her properly.

"Well, in that case, lady Cinderella - would you like to slip out to the gardens, so we could talk more in private?" He was waiting for her answer, and when she nodded and said,

"I'd love to, my prince," He breathed out in relief.

"Call me Fili, please," He said, and when they were near the glass doors, leading to gardens, they slipped out without anyone noticing.

They walked through the gardens, and talked about the ball, Fili's life and what not. When they walked around daisies, Y/N carefully picked one up. Fili's eyebrow rose in curiousity.

"There are many other flowers you can pick in the garden, my lady," She shrughed her shoulders.

"I like daisies. They are beautiful, and yet delicate and simple. They may seem ordinary, but I love them," He hummed in response and picked one too.

"May I?" He asked. Y/N nodded, curious what he was about to do. Fili placed the daisy to her hair behind her ear.

"Done," He smiled. He took her hands into his, and she gave him a curious look.

"Can we dance? Just us two, without etiquette," he shrugged his shoulders to make it seem more casual.

"I'd love to," was her answer.

They silently danced for a while, when Y/N frowned.

"Sorry, I just stepped on your toes-"

"It's okay, I actually happened to step on, uhm, all those ladies' toes and..." He looked away with embarassed face and Y/N giggled. Fili gave her a dreamy smile.

"My lady," he said and interwined their hands. Y/N hummed.

"You've been my best company through the whole celebration. I know this may be a bit too fast, but-" A sudden clock strucking sound caught Y/N's attention.

First.

"I-I'm very sorry, Pri-Fili. I've had an amazing time with you, but I have to leave now," She muttered before running through the gardens and around the castle.

Second.

One of her shoes slipped down, but she didn't got the time to take it back. She kept running.

Third.

Her dress were getting lighter and shorter, she noticed soft sparkles in the air around her.

Fourth.

She quickly came into the coach, and they barely made it through gates, before they were closed.

Fifth.

The lizard and little bird were now inside of the coach, the bird flying away.

Sixth.

It's been a short while, before the coach was getting smaller, and Y/N noticed soft smell of freshly cutted pumpkin.

Seventh.

She looked out of the little window. The night was bright, the moon was full, too.

Eight.

Her dress were almost back to how they looked like before, the sparkling dust was out of her hair and away from her face.

Nineth.

Her glowes were away, and the pumpkin crushed. Y/N and the lizard fell down to the ground, where were two cats, but still one horse. Y/N sat up and took all of them with her.

Tenth.

Y/N could see the roof of the house she was coming back to.

Eleventh.

The horse was smaller and smaller, and then he stopped - and Y/N quickly placed them all down, when the horse was a cat again. James.

Twelveth.

And everything was the way it was before. Except for...

Y/N looked down and picked up the shoe. The only thing that stayed the way it was.

The following days, Y/N couldn't stop thinking about the prince. Sure, he was kind and handsome - and that was probably enough for him to stay in her head ever since. But there was something else, which made her sad. He didn't knew her real name.

In palace, Fili was going through all the adresses, just to find out there was nobody with the name 'Cinderella'. He looked up when someone entered the door. It was his younger brother, Kili, who was more likely to catch attention of many maidens, also thanks to his shameless flirting and straight-forward attitude. But he was already courting now, the lady had both sharp tongue and mind, and soft heart. Fili was watching his brother, because he usually didn't had this expression on his face.

"What happened, Kee?" Fili asked. Kili looked over the table, full of mess.

"I will help you to find her," He said.

"I've got an idea." Fili's brows furrowed. This was never a good sign. Kili noticed his expression, and sighed. Fili could tell something was troubling him.

"I know it may be stupid, but what if we would just let all the ladies to try on the shoe?" Fili's eyes widened.

"Kili-"

"Nah, I know it was stupid, sorry Fee-"

"That is the best idea you've ever had!" Kili's eyes widened.

"Wait, what?!" Fili hugged his brother, but soon both their faces scrunched.

"That will take a while," Kili muttered and Fili nodded.

"I will start sooner then. We need to find her!" Fili said and started ordering to get his horse ready.

He won't give up.

It took days, and no maiden fitted the shoe on so far. It was as if the shoe itself was either becoming too big, or too small, so it wouldn't fit. But Fili was determined to find the woman of his heart.

Y/N was living her normal life, back in her old routine. Her mother and sisters would complain about the woman who danced with the prince, that she had him for whole evening and neither of her sisters got to dance with him. She smiled when they couldn't see her.

When after a few weeks Fili found the last house, he had a little spark of hope left. She could be there, but also not.

When they entered the house, two young women were right there. Fili didn't thought much of them, but he let them to try the shoe on. It didn't fitted to any of them, and they were about to leave, when he noticed a person hiding behind the corner.

"Come out, don't be shy," he smiled. When she stepped out, his surprise grew.

"Try the shoe on, m'lady," he said. The young woman nodded, and, surprise surprise, it fitted perfectly!

"So, lady Cinderella," He smiled.

"I'm-my name is Y/N, my lord," She looked down, but he softly lifted up her chin, so she would look at him.

"Only Fili, Y/N. For you always Fili," He stood up, and they stepped out, hand by hand. Y/N could hear her sisters and mother to yell, how was it possible - but it felt like it was far, far away.

Fili and Y/N came back to the castle, where they had beautiful wedding. When the time came up, they ruled the kingdom with kindness and justice. The people of the kingdom couldn't wish for better King and Queen.

And that all thanks to kindness and courage of heart, but also some sprinkles of magic...

#fili x reader #filixreader #fili #the hobbit #the hobbit fanfiction #cinderella au #kili #au #kili x reader #the durins au #kili durin #fili durin #dis #fili fluff #fili friday

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obxcunt · 3 years

Text

Love bites || (4)

pairing: jj maybank x reader [eventually] || rafe cameron x reader [currently]

warnings: cursing, typos.

summary: it was supposed to be a good summer for you, the last one in the obx before going to college, the last one with your friends and family. Unfortunately, a sudden and mysterious death is about to completely change your life, pushing you directly into a brand new world and into a very sexy vampire’s arms.

A/N: thank you so much guys, comments, likes, notes and dms means so much to me i’m glad you are enjoying my story! Love you all.

part three || masterlist || part five

“I can't see you right now, Rafe.” You said, holding the phone. “I— I need to help my mom with something at home.” You lied, glancing at the blond vampire next to you.

“Are you okay?” Rafe asked, concerned by how distant you've been recently. “Is it because of me? Shit, Y/N. I’m sorry if my—”

“Relax, it has nothing to do with you, Rafe.” You cut off, closing your eyes as you sat down on the ground with your guest, head falling back in a sigh. “It's just— It's just complicated for me to be around anyone right now. I need to be alone, but i’ll text you tomorrow, alright?”

He sighed. “Okay, i’ll see you later.”

You both hang up at the same time, guilt still occupying your mind as you threw the phone away. You looked at the horizon, the view from your backyard always calming you down when you need it. The last time you were there: Rafe and you were sharing your first kiss after a party: the heated memory making you smirk. But today you were sitting next to a vampire, discovering a brand new world.

“I don't like lying to people, especially my friends.” You said, breaking the silence, the nature’s noises accompanying your words. “They're also in danger—”

“Trust me, they know way more than you think.” JJ said, looking at the grass, his black-painted fingers wandering through it.

You ignored his sentence, too busy looking at him, examining his normal appearance: tanned skin, muscles, bright blue eyes, nothing seemed different. You weren't expecting vampires to look this good.

“What happened to you?” He briefly glanced at you. “You look so—” You paused shrugging your shoulders. “Human.”

He chuckled. “Remember my birthday party at John B’s, last year?” You hummed, he had invited you for some reason, but you couldn’t make it. “When everyone left, i decided to go home. I don’t know why, but i really wanted to see my dad on my eighteenth birthday.” He paused, a sad smile appearing on his face. “He was really high and drunk, we fought about it.” Your lips parted, guessing his next words. “My dad beat me to death.”

“JJ...” Your voice cracked, tears emerging once again. You couldn’t believe it. Everyone knew his father’s reputation and bad habits, but this was something else. “I— I don’t even know what to say. I’m sorry, you deserved so much better.” The blond boy looked at you, giving you a tiny smile. He wanted to wipe away the sad expression you were wearing. “But, how did you—”

“It happened outside, he left my body there.” He said, sniffing and looking at the rings on his fingers, nervously playing with them. “Marcus found me, he smelled my blood from miles away.” He smirked. “He felt extremely sorry as soon as he saw me, he knew my father and quickly understood. He thought i deserved a second chance. So, he saved me.”

“Who’s Marcus?” You asked. “Wait, are you talking about the old drug dealer?” JJ nodded. “He’s a vampire?” You raised your brows. “Wow... I always thought he was strange.”

“Yeah...” JJ continued. “He turned me, right in time.” Your eyes widened, imagining the scene. “It wasn’t easy, especially the first week. Marcus teached me how to survive, to control myself and everything i needed to know.”

“But...” He looked back at you, smirking at your confused face: you looked adorable. It was both surprising and comforting how easy you were to talk to. You were surprised too, feeling strangely good and safe with him. “What about, Luke? He killed himself, right?” You asked, remembering the event from last year. “Was it because of— Or did you?”

“I didn’t kill him.” He cut off, you nodded a bit reassured. “He killed himself a few hours after killing me. He really left the house, drove to Barry’s and shot himself. The cops didn’t even question it, since he had a poor reputation. They looked for me, obviously. I wasn’t in a good shape, dealing with the whole turning thing. Marcus lied to them, by saying that i was sick and they believed it. I think they just wanted to close the case. I’ve been living at John B’s since then.”

“Right.” You nodded, chin resting on your knees as you held your legs against your chest, trying to memorize everything. “Your friends know about you, don’t they?” He laughed. “Of course they do.” You added, feeling stupid for asking. “And, wasn’t it a bit awkward at first?”

“The hardest part was definitely accepting my death and what happened to me. I disappeared for a few days, ignored their calls and texts before telling them everything. I had to learn how to behave in public first, which wasn’t easy for me. I’m still struggling sometimes.” He explained, sighing. “But, since Kiara is a witch—” You chuckled at the irony, you ignored so much things. “They took it pretty well. Pope asked a lot of questions though, he was a bit nervous around me but mostly intrigued.”

You smirked. “I do have many questions as well!” You said with excitement, sitting down properly. “Like, why aren’t you burning right now?” He chuckled, enjoying your reaction to his condition. “We’ve been outside for hours. Also, how do you feed? Do you have powers?”

He sighed, smiling. “Okay, let’s start with this.” He pointed at the ring on his finger. “See this one? Well, Kie made it for me. It protects me from the sun.” You nodded, looking at it attentively. “I don’t feed on humans, but on animals and sometimes we steal blood-bags from the nearest hospital.” He looked at your neck, licking his lips just to tease you. “But, you look delicious.” You rolled your eyes, smiling. “Let me guess, type O?” He teased again, laughing as you smacked his arm. “My favorite...”

“Fuck off, JJ.” He laughed.

“And, we are not in Twilight. I’m far from Edward Cullen, even though we both share the same strength and speed.” You looked at the intriguing boy. “I won’t read your mind. Unfortunately, it’s not on the list.” You smirked, narrowing your eyes at him. “That’s too bad, i’m sure your thoughts are very interesting.”

“What about—” You sighed. “The other one, the vampire who killed my friend.” JJ hummed. “Do you know him?”

“No, that's the problem.” He replied. “And it seems like he's not alone. We think they are from another state, just passing by.” You looked around the garden, wondering if they were around here. “Don't worry, they won't bother anyone during the day. They're not coming out, which means they probably don't know any witches. They're either old school vampires or newborns, who don't care about consequences. They took so much risk by killing Kelce.”

“The police department knows about it, right? They know it's not an animal.” JJ nodded, chuckling. “I knew something was wrong the other day.”

“Vampires used to be a massive problem around here, in the past.” He explained. “That's when the slayers came around and eradicated them. It's a family thing, only touching the sons.” You frowned, rethinking about your conversation with Ward. “We were safe for a while. We are a small group, not messing around and respecting the rules. But, Kelce’s death changed the game.”

“They called the slayers back and now, they're all looking for vampires to kill.” He nodded. “That's not good…”

“Yeah…” He laughed. “Especially since you're dating one of them.” You frowned, jaw dropping. “Ward Cameron comes from one of the most famous families of slayers of all time. Which means that his wonderful son is going to join them anytime soon.”

“Holy shit.” You said, laughing nervously and running a hand through your hair. “The other day, while we were throwing a party for Kelce at their place, i heard a weird conversation he was having on the phone with someone. He was saying a lot of things, but nothing really made sense to me, until now. He seemed really nervous.” JJ wasn't surprised. “Peterkin was also there, she was supposed to meet him.”

“They're obviously preparing something.”

“I’m not dating him, JJ.” You added, annoyed by his comment. “I don't know why you keep—” He chuckled, interrupting you.

“Alright, Y/N.” He said. “You might not be dating him, officially. However, you were still having sex with him that night.” He smirked at the sight of your heated cheeks. “I saw it, while searching for the other vampire. Unfortunately, it was already too late for Kelce. I still managed to save you though when you walked back to the—”

“Wait!” You snapped. “It was you, behind me?”

“Technically, we were both behind you. He was looking at you and clearly enjoying your fear, he wanted to mess with your head. I chased him away while you were calling 911. He wanted to kill you too.” You remained silent, in shock. “I saved your pretty ass two times already, Y/N.” He joked, the hidden compliment making you blush once again.

“So, you can’t read minds?” You asked, wanting to switch subjects. “Or see the future? I thought vampires had more powers.” JJ smiled, standing up and offering you a hand. “What are you doing?” You asked, accepting it and standing up in front of the blond boy.

“I can't read minds or see the future, but—” You looked at him in the eyes and pouted, his heart melting at the sight. “I can do some other things though...” You raised a brow, curious.

In one second: the blond boy disappeared. You turned around, searching for him everywhere. “JJ?” He screamed your name and you looked up, noticing him sitting down on the roof with a playful smirk on his face. “How did you—” He moved again, making you laugh.

You tried to turn around, feeling his presence behind you. “Don't move.” He murmured close to your ear, both hands resting on your hips. “We can sense your blood from miles away.” He murmured, caressing your forearm: making you shiver against his body. “We can also hear your heartbeat from miles away.” His hand slowly moved up to your shoulder. “Even your moans…” He smirked against your ear: a silent moan escaping your lips.

“Stop it!” You whined, turning around to face him and smack his chest while he laughed at you. “Idiot.” He stopped, calming down. “I’m sorry, for calling you crazy earlier.”

He scoffed. “You’re adorable, but you don’t need to apologize. It was a normal reaction.” You nodded, smirking. “Anyway.” He continued. “I need your help. I'm pretty sure Ward is preparing something.” You crossed your arms. “I need to get access to his office, where he’s hiding shit.”

You frowned. “Wait, what?” You both started walking back to the front porch. “But, you're a vampire, you're way more discreet than me.”

“Probably, it seems like you have clumsy tendencies.” You stopped walking, rolling your eyes. “But it's impossible for me to get access to his office, since i'm not allowed to enter their mansion.”

“What do you mean?” You asked, following him. “Are they putting way too much Holy Water on the door handles or something?”

He laughed, gently pushing you. “That's very funny.” You smiled, taking the few stairs leaning to the porch before sitting down on the bench. “Vampires can't enter houses without getting invited in first.”

“Oh.” You said. “What about Sarah Cameron? Aren't you guys friends? And i’m pretty sure you came to a party at their house last year.”

“Kiara doesn’t want her girlfriend to be involved in this for now. And, this was before my death. I don’t think Ward Cameron the slayer wants me on his property anymore.” He said, sitting down next to you. “But, since you’re close to Rafe—”

“Shut up...” You whined, rubbing your face, your reaction making him laugh. “Wait, is this why you don’t want me to invite you inside my house? So, you can’t get any access?” He nodded, looking at his black combat boots. “Why not? I don’t understand.”

“It’s for your own safety.” You sighed. “I’m not gonna hurt you, it’s not in my intentions but—” He paused, clearing his throat. “Anyway, Ward and Rafe can’t know about this, obviously.”

“I won’t say anything to anyone.” You promised. “But i don’t think Rafe knows about any of this, JJ.” You said, trying to rassure him. “Don’t worry.”

“Not yet.” He sighed. “Ward is gonna have to inform him, at some point. Rafe won’t become an actual slayer until he kills a vampire by himself, that’s a part of their ritual.” He explained, visibly worried. “I don’t want my new family and friends to die. We— We need to take care of those vampires before anyone else dies.”

Shit, you thought. You didn’t want to lie to anyone, especially your family and friends but you had to. You also didn’t want to use Rafe but you couldn’t help feeling bad for JJ, who didn’t deserved to suffer either. He already went through enough shit.

JJ didn’t want to force you, he wouldn’t. But there was something about you, something telling him that he could trust you. You both remained silent for a moment, until you had made up your mind.

“Okay, fine.” You said, making him look back at you with a smirk. “I’ll help you, if you promise to not hurt anyone, especially Rafe.” He opened his mouth, ready to object. “He’s still innocent, we might not need to fight. We could do this before he turns into a slayer, okay? He’s still my friend and—”

“Okay, we won’t do anything to your boyfriend.” He cut off, the nickname making you growl. “Unless he starts attacking us first.”

“Don’t call him my boyfriend, or you’ll have to find someone else.” He rolled his eyes playfully. “Alright, what do you need, JJ?” He smirked, knowing you were both about to jump in a risky and exciting adventure together.

A/N: If you guys have any questions regarding the fic, feel free to ask me, requests are open!

———————————————————————

tag-list: @prejudic3-deactivated20201112 @starkeyrafe @thestorysofargone @ifilwtmfc @callmeimpetuous @katiaw2 @your-local-candle-addict @iccyyyybitch @agirlwholovescoffee @hvrcruxes

[tumblr won’t let me tag some people, comment if you wanna be add]

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azazelsconfessional · 3 years

Note

**she rests her head against the tree and she tries to remember more**

Alasandra: I remember hearing of a tale.. In my world about a painting.. The forlorn were drawn to it's cold, dark, and gentle presence.. But I guess I found my own painting.. Haha.. This, I find.. It much more pleasant..

And to answer your question.. no.. I didn't serve the lord of light.. No one remembers who he was.. We just know he existed..

But.. As for we humans, we come from the dark.. Born of the dark soul and humanity.. I learned that the lord of light was scared of us and caused this curse.. By banishing the age of darkness.. By linking the fire that cause us all life in the beginning.. "The first flame"..

I thought this was all myth.. But.. My recent master.. Lord Aldia.. Was right after all..

And no.. He was no god.. But another scholar himself..

**she closes her eyes and balls her fists as quiet tears stream down her face**

Why did humanity deserve this.. Shackled like this..

"As much as I enjoy art, the real thing is often much better." He runs his hand over her hair. “If only for the experience.”

Well, at least she didn't serve a cruel god. . .as far as he knows anyway. But as she tells the story of humanity. . .mourns humanity's bondage. . .he twists fingers into his own chains.

He is not of her world, but. How familiar it all sounds.

"Why, indeed. . . ." He pulls her to his chest, leaning her head against the fur of his ruff. Sure it's warm out, but that may be better than the tree. He wipes her tears with his fingers. "I'm sorry. It seems like humans are often unified across worlds in their suffering.

"But. . .though I'm no lord of darkness, in my own world the supreme God, a being of light, created humanity. But their purpose and their freedom was limited.

"I saw this as tragic and cruel--you humans are such beautiful creatures with so much potential. Even if you come from the dark, your soul is bright and stunning.

". . .So I encouraged the first woman to eat from the tree of knowledge of good and evil--of which they'd been forbidden by God. But God considered my giving humans greater awareness and knowledge a sin. Ultimately, she was punished worse than I; I was still allowed to give knowledge to her replacement and the first man as well, and she had been ejected from the Garden that housed humanity's beginning before the rest had, and eventually Exiled from our world entirely. It was simply part of my Role--our Roles--as sacrifices to the System that runs our world.

"I cannot speak for the darkness from which you came or the fire which gave you life. . .but if the Lord of Light feared mortals, I wonder if the 'Dark Soul' acted out of love just as I did. And if the Lord of Light feared life having knowledge, lives, memories, that could rival his own capabilities, threatening to topple his influence."

He doesn't often go around telling everyone he was present for the creation of the first humans in Eden, even when he teaches it. He certainly doesn't say he was the serpent who gave the first humans the fruit of knowledge. But generally the people he tells would hold a harsh bias against him if he were to say so. He hopes that the suggestion would, instead, be of a comfort to her--that the world's suffering could have been an act of love that ultimately went wrong.

Though who's to say she won't find this more upsetting than comforting.

"Ultimately, after insisting upon teaching knowledge of the heavens to humanity, I was bound with these chains." He gives them a jingle. "But living despite them, with the changes brought with them, taking pride in the 'crime' which bound me. . .I don't believe it was deserved. It was no act of your own that bound you to the ‘losing’ side.

"But have you not made it so far in your life, and done so much, despite it all? Knowing this outcome, you persisted through life and accomplished much. Perhaps this is not the end for you--just. . .a time you get to rest."

Like transients taken by the light who ultimately return once they've regained their energy. Perhaps if there's a way to restore her mind, she'll simply get to take a much-needed rest from using it.

"Light banishes the dark--but without light, there can be no shadow. Perhaps the light is not taking your memories and your mind, but making you blind to them within you instead. In which case, perhaps all you’ll need is more of the darkness that made humanity to remember yourself again.

“. . .” Her memories. He needed what was left.

“I will remember you, Alasandra. But for that to work best, I need to hear what you remember of yourself. The things that most make you who you are. In particular, perhaps if you remember wrongs you’ve done--I have the power to retain the memories of others, in the form of their sins especially. If the humans of your world are beings of darkness, perhaps your life can be preserved in the form of your Shadow.

“So. . .please tell me whatever you can remember. It doesn’t need to be detailed.”

They’re not in the dark of the confessional. She might see the Infernal energy of her sins, from her Shadow, leaving her and go to him to keep. That’s part of why he has that dark space to hear people out in--so they don’t know just what is happening when they confess to him in particular.

But if she believes humans to be born of some dark entity. . .that could be used in his favor. . .and possibly her’s. But he’s only speculating. Desperately speculating, because he hates to see humans suffer.

#long post #charles157 #answers #((i told my brother who loves the souls series about this thread))#((he said he's gonna take her on his journey lol))#((in some world she'll get some Humanity and get to keep living))#((in this one. . .there may be a workaround. it's up to you really))

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nessamaurice · 4 years

Text

Simple Ch. 6 (Loki x F!Reader)

Masterlist

Summary: Tony and the Avengers are in desperate need of something like a “babysitter” to have an eye on Loki and teach him “how to human”. He decided to stay on Midgard over the dungeons of Asgard as punishment for his deeds in New York. That’s where you swoop in. A simple receptionist at the Avengers compound. You have to share an apartment in the compound with Loki and damn, he’s a really tough nut. With your open and kind character it seems that you are slowly cracking his shell. But suddenly things are getting twists that will change your life and your relationships there irreversibly.

Story rating: M

Chapter trigger warnings: harming

Words: 2108

It turned out the tests Bruce made with you seemed to be alright, nothing you didn't knew or that wasn’t indicated before. The following days passed without anything special happening, except your relation with Loki. You tried to pick up the conversation with Loki again but apparently the moment was over. He shut himself off again. But you didn't miss out that he continued to feel more comfortable around you. The next day he accepted your tea offering for the first time. That made you ridiculously happy and you couldn't hide the big grin appearing on your face.

"What's so funny?"

"What? Oh, no, nothing." After a few moments of silence you couldn't hold back, "Do you like my tea? Today I chose a rose flavored green tea. I love the scent of roses. I don't like the flowers themselves, they are everywhere you look, being pretentious, I'm just weary of them, but their scent...“ You let out a little, soft moan. „Wonderful."

Your rambling was met with silence and you almost gave in, disappointed. But before you looked away you could see a small smirk tugging on his lips.

A few days later you just couldn't contain yourself anymore. You turned in your winged chair to Loki.

"How are you feeling today?"

"...What?"

"How do you feel? We've been sharing these rooms for quite a few days now and have barely spoken to each other. Tell me something. Anything. Or ask me something! Just let us interact in any way. I can't take it any longer."

He looked you straight in the eyes, the dimmed sunlight making the green-blue almost glow. Then a question seemed to pop up in his mind.

"What are you reading?"

You looked down at the book on your lap. "What I’m reading? Oh, that is something specific. It's called Antiquitates Iudaicae. It's not that easy to read, it's not like a novel or something, it is more like a history book. The text is about 1900 years old. A roman-jewish historian named Flavius Josephus tries to explain his beliefs to the Greek to help them understand his culture."

"Why are you reading this, since it is not easy to read?"

"I am a faithful person and it helps me a bit understanding the setting and the time when the bible was written. There are no other ancient Jews from the first century left around here, so I wanted to know how he tried to explain his culture to persons that have no relation with it."

"So, you believe in god? Then you must be humbled to be in the presence of one." A lofty expression appeared on his face, but was wiped away the second you started laughing.

"I'm sorry, really. Don't want to be disrespectful. But do you really think you are a god? Just because you have access to other dimensions and live a few thousand years? Not that this wouldn't be highly impressive, honestly. But you are as far away from being a god than I am. You are a creation, not a creator."

Loki wanted to say something but the words kept stuck in his throat. His face turned sly.

"You have no idea what I am capable of." His voice was low and husky.

"You are completely right. If there was some sort of food chain, I'd clearly be beyond you because of your many skills and knowledge. But they don't make you the summit, neither. Look, I totally see why the ancient Norse people thought of you as gods. What you can do is really admirable. But I would never give you this title. I got too much respect of it."

Loki tried to swallow down his anger. He really wanted to behave but even more he wanted you to explain that. "So, what do you think deserves this title?"

"Love. Compassion. Mercy. Omnipotence. I think, nothing in the whole universe happens without him allowing it to happen. Even the bad things. For the most people it's hard to accept that. They blame him for all the terrible things. It's not like that he would cause the bad things to happen. But he knows exactly what's going on. He knows every outcome of every move. And, I believe, he leads us on the tracks we should go. Not like we are just marionettes and he sets every move, but at some points, big decisions that give our lifes a turn, he may give us a certain push. A lot dreadful stuff happened to me in my life, but who knows that it couldn't have been even worse? Who is able to say the way it went is not the best of all possibilities? Even if it is hard to cope with, I know he gives me the strength to get through. Whether it is some sort of energy that comes from within me or he puts people in my life that will help me with whatever comes my way. But that is my totally personal point of view. The nice thing is, I don't have to persuade anyone to believe the same. My faith is individual. Nobody has to agree with me. This is what helps me get through life. Not to give up.... What sort of faith do you have? ...if you have one at all?"

Loki listened carefully and his face slowly softened as he followed your thoughts. He seemed a bit surprised as you addressed the question to him, like he was asked for his opinion for the first time in his life.

"That is a very interesting point of view, I have to admit. I can imagine that it is not very popular, but interesting, though. I... I never really developed something you could call faith. My culture is full of myths and legends. I learned everything about our Allfathers and Gods, but never took it really personal. I was not attracted to do so."

He stopped talking and started pondering on that thought. You watched his face, his eyes getting lost. You used the opportunity to take a closer look and studied his face. It was edgy and delicate at the same time. His bright eyes pierced right through you every time he looked at you. He was very concentrated on what he wanted to say next, so you simply kept quiet and waited for him to form his thoughts into words. It was rather beautiful to watch his mind work.

After a short while he continued, "I think there might be something like a higher force that has impact on our lives. But that started just recently. I long thought that I am the master of every of my own steps and if I place them right, everything will work out just fine. I will get what I want if I only fight hard enough for it. So that's what I did, I fought for my own purposes. But all I got was misery, sorrow and hatred."

You could literally see his pain boiling up from the inside. It was tearing him in two. You reacted out of instinct and reached out to lay your hand on his cheek. His eyes darted at you immediately, turning glassy. Softly you stroke over his cheek with your thumb. You wished you could just pull him into a tight embrace and help him let go of all expectations towards himself. To put down his guard. It was like you could literally feel his inner need of ease and solace. But he was just too much of a proud man. He pressed his lips together and pushed your hand away, abruptly stood up, stepping towards the window front, staring outside with his arms crossed.

"I'm sorry." Was all that came to your mind. Pathetic, you thought. And he thought that as well.

"You have no idea what you are talking about." He hissed turning towards you. "Don't act like you would understand. YOU HAVE NO IDEA!" He shouted at you and disappeared right in front of your eyes. You sat there in your winged chair, nonplussed. You looked around the room, but no sight of him.

Far beyond puzzled, you started to talk with the air. "I... I don't if you are still here? But, I wanted to say that you are right. I have no idea what you've been through. What it feels like to be in your skin. If I were, I know I would have done the same that you did, because you are the only person that feels this way. I am no one to judge. I never judge. Well, at least I try. The big truth is that it's simply impossible to compare individuals with each other. We are the summaries of our experiences and we all have our very own way of perceiving the world around us. So, I have to add as well that you also have no idea what you are talking about. I do understand. Traumata are a serious thing and everyone reacts differently to that, but don't treat me like I had no empathy. Maybe everyone else treated you like you didn't even had the right to speak your mind, but I'm not like this. You are intelligent and attentive and if you haven't noticed that by now, you are obviously blinded by some kind of rage and hatred. And pride. But I don't want to push you. Just know that I won't let you treat me like this. I will not leave you because I can imagine that you've been left too often in your life, but I will not tolerate it. Okay, and because it feels like I have a serious conversation with myself outside of my head I'm gonna go into the kitchen to get me a drink because that's fucking strange. Feel free to join me there."

You sat on a barstool and looked out of the giant window front at the other side of the even bigger room. You felt the cold sweat of the glass condensing in your hand, running over your fingers. Totally lost in your thoughts you didn't notice Steve sitting down next to you. He really tried not to startle you but failed.

"Sorry Y/N. Just thought you looked like something was on your mind you'd like to talk about?"

"No problem. Ah, no, it's okay. There were just some intense emotions between Loki and me."

Looking at his raised eyebrows you awkwardly cleared your throat as you explained yourself, "Oh no no no, not something like that. Totally not. No no." Somehow you dwelled in that thought a bit too long.

"Well, that were lots of 'no's but okay." Steve laughed and pushed you slightly with his shoulder to the side.

Before you could blush too obviously you changed topic, "Have you seen Tony? The last time I saw him was when were having pizza. Is everything alright?"

"To be honest I haven't seen him, neither. Well, at least not in person. I walked by the lab and saw him video chatting with Bruce, so he must be okay. But don't worry, wouldn't be the first time he disappears for a few days without telling anyone. ... Are you sure you don't want to talk about what's weighing you down?"

"Thank you Steve. Everything's fine." You conjured a smile though you didn't felt like smiling which made it totally implausible. But Steve accepted you didn't want to talk right now. He assured you can knock on his door whenever you wanted before he left the open kitchen of the common room again. You really, really hoped Loki would show up in the kitchen. You imagined both of you together having a drink, talking, enjoying each other's companionship... But you were pulled out of your day dream by a polite voice.

"Miss Y/N, your presence is demanded outside of the personal rooms."

"What? Me? For what?" You thought JARVIS sounded differently than usual.

"I am sorry, Miss, but I was not given further information than it being important and urgent."

"Uhm, okay. Sure. Just a sec." You gulped down the rest of your Gin Tonic and jumped off the barstool. For a moment it felt like someone was slightly brushing your arm as to hold you. You stopped, looked around, but didn't see anyone, so you went on.

After you slipped into your shoes and a coat you were going down to the ground floor with the lift. The doors opened and the blood in your veins froze. Two giant, black-suited men immediately entered the lift. One grabbed your arms and pulled them violently behind your back and the other one pressed a strongly sweet smelling piece of fabric on your mouth and nose. You felt a sharp sting right into the side of your neck just before everything went limp and dark.

Taglist: @it-jinxed-us, @humbledarkness, @lunawitch19

#loki #Loki Laufeyson #loki x reader #loki x female reader #loki fiction #loki slow burn #slow burn #marvel fan fiction #marvel #fanfiction #fanfic simple #nessa maurice

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bts5sosempire · 5 years

Text

BTS Reaction: friends + accident kissing = a couple (Hyung Ver.)

A/n: so myself deadass thought of something at like 3am and I'm like why don't I just write it down and work on it tomorrow morning. When I woke up and check my draft I write something along the line "just kiss him" as the headline and was like wtf before I try to remember what I am really aiming. Long results too.

Kim Seokjin:

Jin had invited you over to celebrate Hoseok birthday and now you guys were playing an Uno game, by drinking shots. You watch as Jungkook skip Taehyung and you were next to Taehyung and it was you who had to drink a shot.

You were getting so tipsy and drunk as you only had one more card in the game and you look at Jungkook who had a smudged look on his face. “Jeon, I hate you so much right now, after all these years I protected you from the rest of Bangtan and this is how you repay me?” Slurring out the words, you slammed down a card. “I'm done!”

You lay on the ground and roll away to go outside, to get fresh air.

It took another hour or so for the game to finished and everyone is shit face drunk, besides Jin, who come to check up on you who was hunching over the railing as you were making a long whining sound.

Jin came over to pull you back in case you fell over. “Hey, are you alright?” He asked and you look up at him. Your face was flushed red from the alcohol and you were hiccupping. Shaking your head, you try to push Jin aside, but got caught with his feet and tangle them up. The both of you fall on the ground together and you end up kissing him.

Jin was rather surprised and he hastily pushed you back. His face became flustered he was about to stutter out an apology, but you went to besa him first. “Jin you know I like you right? Not as a friend, but more than that. Maknae Jungkook has been encouraging me to confess to you but I really can't do it, b-but- wait forget about what I just say.” Your words sent his heart flying. You stand up but stumble, so Jin decides to carry bridal style.

“I-I like you too!” He declared looking away. You tap his face and force him to look at you.

“Why are you looking away? Are you being honest? Do you like to play with my feelings?” With your questions attacking at him at all angles, Jin feels his brain went dead. Your eyes squinted at him. Jin blush at your intensity.

“Stop looking at me like that or I'll have to kiss you again!” He hurriedly carries you inside and ran to his bedroom with the members eyes lingering at him and you in his arms.

“I told you he likes her!” Jungkook shouted before knocking himself out as he plopped back onto the hard ground.

Min Yoongi:

Yoongi somehow convinces you to do a fake date with him to throw off some girl who has been chasing after him for about three months now and she had been bothering and distracting him also.

You were worried as this isn't something you would just randomly do, but if Yoongi needed help, you would help him. After all, you do like him as a crush even if he doesn't like you that way. And even if this isn't like a real date, this would be the closest thing you would ever get with him.

Yoongi came to find you while wearing all black with a leather black jacket and cap. He entered a secluded shop to where he knows that people won't be there. You wore an opposite outfit from him, soft pastel colors to bring out your warmth.

“Um hi,” you awkwardly wave at him and he comes to sit down across from you. “So how are we going to plan this out? Did she follow you?” Asking with a discreet look, you look out the window at the corner of your eyes and see the lunatic woman right across the street who was looking here and there for Yoongi.

“What do you think?” Yoongi retort back at you, and you smack your lips together and mouth out an ‘Okay’ before looking back at him.

“So the original plan as it is.” Sliding over a cup of coffee at him, you both walk out of the shop. Yoongi hand slides into yours and you look at his hand in surprise. You try to tug it away with a blush on your face.

“Act natural.” He whispers into your ear, before tugging on your hand and tightens his hold. The woman saw Yoongi and ran across the street as multiple cars were honking at her.

The woman grips on Yoongi's arm and tore him to look at her. “I've been following you, and why aren't you answering your phone?” The woman then looks at you before sneering then her eyes went lower and saw the both of your hands interlock with each other. “Let go of my Yoongi's hand you wretched witch!” The lunatic woman tries to tear both you and Yoongi apart, but the man got in front of you.

“I appreciate if you don't harass either me or my girlfriend or I'll have to take action against you,” Yoongi warns her before walking away with you.

“Girlfriend?” The woman mutter before she let out a screech and tries to attack Yoongi. You look behind you and saw her charging at Yoongi with a weapon. Pulling the man aside, you both stumble as coffees fly into the air and lips happened to lip-lock with each other. The both of you were both wide eyes.

“Did that crazy woman try to stabbed the Min Yoongi and his girlfriend?!” A bystander shouted and two men were restraining the crazy woman down as she was shouting and kicking like hell while trying to bite their hands. “Someone called the police and inform BigHit!”

You shove Yoongi aside whisper a shy sorry, “I-I didn't mean too, u-uh she was charging at you and I didn't want you to get hurt or anything...” Your words trail off and your face gets redder and redder.

“I like you too (Name),” Yoongi told you and you look at him with your mouth agape as words left your mouth. “I like you for a long time actually.” He stands up and dusted himself off before pulling you up from the ground, “Why don't we go on a real date this time?”

Jung Hoseok:

You were friends with Hoseok and the rest of the boys for a long time. You were one of their unofficial dance teachers and their little cheerleader, according to the rest of bts. Jin had like you more than Hoseok when it comes to teaching them how to dance and everyone runs to you for help whenever Hoseok gave them a glare when they forgot a step in the choreography.

Everyone calls you ‘Mrs. Jung’ teasingly since you are very caring and very affectionate with Hoseok even though the both of you are friends. But everyone knows how you both really feel for each other. Hoseok often gives you gifts and stuff whenever you come over and you always run to help Hoseok when he's in trouble.

And today is just one of those days. You and Hoseok were leading the dance routine for the boys since everyone had literally begged and ask Hoseok to call you for help. No one likes it when he gets stern, but when you came over its like Hoseok is a different person. He became softer, but with your head turn behind him he glares at them.

“Alright let's relax!” You shouted as the music stops, everyone dropped to the ground in exhaustion and you went over to Hoseok and swing a tried arm at him. He playfully uses a finger to cup your chin before pinching your cheeks and you move away from him. Hoseok comfortably slings an arm over your shoulders and let you drag him away to a couch.

Hoseok lay his sweaty head on your shoulder before poking your cheeks, “Have you lost some face fat?” He pokes them again, “They are not pudgy anymore.” You patted your own face a few times and look up at the ceiling in wonder, before looking down at him in confirmation to which Hoseok just poke them. “Have you been eating well?”

“Yeah I did, it's just that I recently had been hitting the gym so I guess it's normal for me to...lose them?”

“(Name) noona you go to the gym too?” A Jungshook ask before he comes sprinting at you at full speed and sat next to you. Hoseok tries to shoo the younger one away from you. “Do you mind going with me next week, I want to see your workout regime.”

“Jungkook you had Jimin to help you with that and you still want my little (Name) to go with you? Aren't you a little selfish?” Hoseok latches his arms around you tighter. He made a little sound effect which sounds like he was offended, and pull you close to him.

“Hyung you always talk with her and you never let us have her phone number too and I'm not about to let go of this opportunity to go away. Plus we all know how you feel-” A shriek left Hoseok's mouth as he lung over with you in his arm and cover Jungkook whiny and big mouth.

“You shush about that!” He warns and the boy's eyes crinkle in amusement to which his eyes are smiling for him. He wiggle his brows.

“Hoseok what is he saying?” Your heart is pounding and you don't want to believe it, but your face is heating up. You loosen the man's arm and sat in front of him with your back turn against the younger boy.

“It's nothing!” Hoseok shout before the younger boy pull Hoseok hand away and was about to say it, but Taehyung came flying forward and crash into Jungkook from behind and Jungkook lurches forward and push you into Hoseok with such force that you fall so fast forward and kiss your friend/ crush.

Everything went quiet as Taehyung mutter an ‘oh shit’ and you pull back from Hoseok so quick that you didn't look at him and you fled the scene with a worried Hoseok right behind you. “Wait (Name)!”

Your face burns with embarrassment. You just kissed Hoseok! Jung fricken' Hoseok, aka your long-time crush!

Running away down the hall, you didn't think Hoseok would catch up so fast. He grabs your arm to stop you and tug you forward to him. “Look I'm sorry, I'm sorry about their action and what just happened.”

“Don't mention about it please,” you didn't look up at him.

“Do you hate me now?” He asks you and you suddenly look up at him. Hoseok was worried you won't see him the same ever again as that accident just happened. He doesn't want to lose you.

“Hate you? It's quite the opposite of hate, to be honest.” You breathe out a sigh of nervousness, and you were going to tell him. It's all or nothing now, “I like you for quite some time now.”

“Oh God, I do too!” He brings you to a sudden embrace. “Let's go out tomorrow as a real couple!” And what just happened was forgiven and forget.

Kim Namjoon:

You had just confessed and kissed your friend Namjoon and you had run away from him without saying goodbye or anything. You want to die, you want to be buried alive, and you want to be killed. You just want to forget what you had done. Now Namjoon won't ever look at you the same again.

Laying in your bed, you had been avoiding any kind of outside contact and communication. You don't like confrontation and that sucks too, but you have to face it somehow if that is going to make you move on. Dreading in bed you roll over to the other side of the bed and pick up your phone that you had it on silent.

Checking the notification, you saw the messages from the boys and Namjoon stood out to you the most since you put him as ‘Crush’ so you just scream into your pillow and toss your phone aside. Letting out those pent up embarrassment, you went to read all the messages before reading Namjoon and everyone was worried about you. “I'm such a horrible person...”

After reading Jin's message you hesitate on clicking on Namjoon's messages. Sucking in a breath you click on it and see about 5 messages but one stood out from all. But this one just happens to be right now.

‘Are you home?’

You send him a quick ‘yeah’ before the doorbell of your apartment was being rung and it resonates inside your entire apartment. You got scared for a second and cautiously get out of bed to check the peephole and saw Namjoon there with his secret blending in attire.

Opening the door, Namjoon walks in. “Um, we need to talk.” You nervously nodded at him before telling to go sit down on the couch as you prep food and drink.

You walk in moments later and set down the snacks and sit across from and as far as possible. “So where do we begin...?”

“Let's start with the day you left.” Namjoon went direct to the point and he didn't want to beat around the bush. Your face went a silent ‘Oh’ and anticipation was building up in your throat. “I never get the chance to tell you how I feel and you did your part, so I thought it was fair for you if you know how I feel too.”

“Uh, you don't have too! I already know you don't feel the same way! It's better if you forget any of my words and action...” You awkwardly laugh and look away from him in an uncomfortable manner-- scratching behind your ear. “I-It's fine really...”

“What if I tell you that I return your feelings?”

“That's not possible-” stopping what you were doing, you look at the serious man across from you, “-wait, what?”

“I had like you more than a friend (Name).” Namjoon stood up from the other side of the couch and walk over to you who slowly try to move away from the towering man. Namjoon grabs your wrist and pulls you close to him and your face burns from the sudden closeness.

“Well...then, I guess I'm not going single this year.”

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dragunjk · 5 years

Text

we're artists, baby | kth

→ synopsis ; taehyung was incredibly, unbelievably talented in any medium you could offer him. y/n ? she couldn't draw a stick figure if she tried.

→ word count ; 2011

→ genre ; fluff ?? angst if u squint ?? idk

→ pairing ; street artist!taehyung x art hoe!reader

→ a/n ; this is for my MF BOYFRIEND TAEHYUNG’S BIRTHDAY bc he's the love of my life my angel my world and he deserves nothing less than the mf best okay okay ik it's late don't BULLY me

There are worse things in the world, Y/n believes. Having your life turned into a Law and Order SVU would be worse, of course. Hoseok could be inviting her over to blindly set her up with another one of his endearing friends who she would much rather be good friends with.

That would definitely be worse.

Unfortunately, Y/n can't help but feel a bit self conscious. How couldn't she, when a masterpiece sat in front of her, nearly taunting her with talent she so greatly wanted to obtain yet couldn't even find in herself. She looked at the mural, an art piece by one anonymous ‘Vante’, the tagging artist that has been taking the internet by storm.

If you ask Y/n, she wasn't jealous. Not at all.

If you ask Namjoon, he could tell you about the nights where Y/n got a little bit too tipsy and poured her heart out about her insecurities and jealousy swimming for the artist she didn't know.

Y/n gazed at the piece again, wrapping her arms around herself due to the sudden chill. Cocking her head, she tried to put the piece together. Hues of yellows and golds sprouted from a detailed portrait of a young child, tall against the blacks and grays sprouting from two parent figures.

What did it mean-

“Y/n, come on we're gonna be late.” Hoseok hummed, shivering at the wind that was picking up. Nodding, Y/n comfortably grasped his hand, letting him maneuver through the large crowd around the new art piece. “You think this movie is gonna be good? People think it's gonna be shitty.” Hoseok turned towards Y/n, who seemed lost in her own thoughts.

“Earth to Y/n-”

Y/n flinched at his loud tone. “Huh- sorry.” She ducked her head sheepishly, and Hoseok hummed, rubbing his thumb over her knuckles. “It just- how does someone have that much talent? It isn't fair-”

“Stop- You have talent in other places. I’ve never heard someone with a voice like yours, now-” Hoseok tugged Y/n into the movie theater. “-we came here to have a good time.” Smiling brightly at Y/n, she couldn't help but mimic it, as he led her through the crowd. “I hope Aquaman is good, I just want to watch a good DC movie, you know?”

Y/n couldn't help but laugh at her friend’s distress, forgetting about her worries even if it was for a moment.

Yoongi was going to kill him.

Well, kill him, scold him, same thing. But Yoongi doesn't have much room to talk, so Taehyung sneaks out anyway, a backpack filled with spray paint and stencils in tow. Except this time, Jungkook was tagging along for the first time.

One day Taehyung will teach himself not to give into Jungkook’s big doe eyes, but tonight was not that night.

“Hyung- Hyung! Where are we going?” Jungkook whispered, sneaking behind Taehyung with a camera in his hands. Clicking record, the younger man pointed the camera at Taehyung, a little smile on his face as Taehyung shook his head in amusement.

“Kook-ah, I told you not to record this-”

“Hyung why do you hate me.”

A sigh escaped Taehyung’s lips, as they both boarded the last bus at twelve am, the glare of the lights messing with the camera in Jungkook’s hands. “Exclusive interview with the world’s most famous tagging artist, Vante-” Jungkook purposely shoved the camera in Taehyung’s face, causing the elder to laugh and swat him away.

“We're here-” Taehyung hummed, getting off the bus with Jungkook following closely. Approaching Los Angeles’ City Hall, Jungkook gasped.

“You can't paint here, you’ll go to jail-”

Taehyung laughed, pulling out his stencils and placing them properly just before the steps of the building, quirking his eyebrow playfully at Jungkook’s concern. “I’m not afraid of jail.” He stated simply, and Taehyung guesses that was enough for Jungkook, as the younger male found comfort in just recording his work.

It wasn't long before Taehyung was almost done, and Jungkook was actually impressed at how fast his friend could get a piece done. “Wow, hyung-”

Taehyung simply smirked, spraying ‘VANTE’ in sharp, jagged letters.

“Vante?”

Both Jungkook and Taehyung froze, heads rising to meet a pair of eyes that stared back at them. It was a woman, maybe around Taehyung’s age, staring with a mix of awe and surprise. “Oh my god, it's you- Your work is so good! I can't believe-”

Taehyung was quick to stand up, grasping her wrists in his hands to stop her from taking a picture. “Hi, yeah-” Jungkook quickly shut off his camera, gawking at the pair. “-I'm gonna need you to keep this a secret, okay- what do you want, money?” She scoffed, pulling her hands away.

“You don't need to bribe me, I won't tell.” Her eyes shone beneath the dim streetlights. “I would, however, like to be friends with you. I want to know why-” She gestured to the piece before her.

Taehyung hummed. “I can do that.”

She smiled. “I’m Y/n.”

“Taehyung.”

“This is hard-”

A groan escaped Y/n’s lips as she let her head hang, canvas blank as she refused to taint it with her horrid skills. A chuckle escaped Taehyung’s lips as he stood behind her, hands setting on her shoulders as his thumbs rubbed soothing patterns into them. “Just come up with an idea, and bring it to life.” Taehyung hummed.

Y/n scoffed. “Oh, easy for you to say. You're like, the world’s most famous street artist. I can't even draw a straight line.” She groaned, putting the palate aside and setting the brush down. “It doesn't matter how hard you try to teach me. This is the third week, Tae. I’m not going to be good at art.” Y/n mumbled sadly, getting up and throwing herself on Taehyung’s bed.

“You're so dramatic.” He hummed fondly, taking her spot at the easel. Y/n whined in response, shielding her eyes with her arm as she gazed at Taehyung paint. “Maybe art isn't your thing then. But you could be talented in so many other mediums. It just, doesn't have to be something you can see.” Taehyung spoke, strokes of pink coating the canvas with ease. “Like music. Music is an art.” Taehyung finished, and Y/n sat up.

“Yoongi-hyung makes music. He's more of a producer than anything else, but he could rap really well and even carry a little tune. He's filled with musicality. He's still an artist. Or cinematography. Jungkook likes filming and editing things so that the end product is almost like a movie, or a music video. He's an artist too.” Taehyung rambled, eyes never leaving the canvas.

“You don't have to be good at the basic art itself to be an artist.”

Y/n laid in silence, pursing her lips at his words.

“Do you really think so?” Y/n asked after a moment.

Taehyung nodded, and Y/n sighed contently, shifting in his bed to face him. He smiled, that was a much better angle to paint her in.

He looked at the canvas again.

It wasn't too long until Y/n invited Taehyung late over the studio one night, eyes bright with promise. “Okay so, it's really rough but you said art isn't really just paint, and since I’ve seen so much of yours, I want to show you mine.” Y/n hummed, clicking a few buttons before pressing play.

“It's like, kinda a Christmas song because I wrote it recently but-”

A music box seemed to play, and Taehyung quickly closed his eyes, as he often did when Yoongi asked him his opinion on music.

A beat picked up, blending nearly perfectly with the light instrumental of the bells and music box, then a voice flowed in, soulful and sweet. Y/n gazed over at Taehyung as the song played, and she smiled fondly at his state. Eyes closed, head tilted back, a little smile on his face as his fingers danced along to the music.

“Your voice is beautiful-” Y/n ducked her head, and Taehyung smiled, wrapping her up in a hug. “-see? I told you everyone has their little talent. Why worry about something you struggle with when you have such a beautiful talent right here?” Taehyung rested his chin on Y/n’s head, ignoring her protests of ‘stop you sap’ and ‘shut up’.

“Thank you.” Y/n hummed after a few moments of silence, and they pulled away. “Don't you have a mural to put up, Tae? Don't keep your fans waiting.” Y/n hummed, smoothing his jacket over his chest.

“They can wait, I’m here with you.” Y/n flushed at Taehyung’s words, shoving him away slightly.

“Then I’ll come with you, I don't want to waste your time-”

“Ah- you can't come with me. It's supposed to be a surprise to everyone.” Taehyung hummed, smiling slightly. “Even you, Kitten.” He spoke, and Y/n sputtered at the pet name, face heating up quickly. “I knew you’d like it. Now, I’ll go. Don't follow me, I want it to be a surprise.” Taehyung smirked slightly. He pressed a chaste kiss to her forehead, leaving Y/n in silence.

Taehyung left, and Y/n let a sigh escape her lips.

She fell. Fell hard, and Y/n doesn't think she could get out of it.

“Y/n, you have to get up right now-”

Y/n groaned, focus hazy as she pressed the phone to her ear. Waking up to Hoseok screaming in her ear wasn't ideal, but it wasn't like she wasn't used to it. “Hoseok? It's early-”

“Y/n get your cute ass up right now- Vante put up a new piece-”

“Okay I can wait until everyone is gone-”

“Y/n it has you in it.”

If Y/n wasn't awake, she was now. She sat up, eyes widening as she threw her blankets off and slipped on her pink Champion slides. Throwing on her white coat, she brushed her teeth and left, pulling her hoodie over her mess of hair.

“Hobi where is it?” Y/n stepped outside, ignoring the chill on her legs.

“Near the new art museum.”

Y/n hung up quickly, breaking out into a run towards the museum that wasn't too far from her house. It wasn't too long before Y/n was before the museum, out of breath, looking at the piece.

It was her, a replica of when she laid distressed on Taehyung’s bed, lips pursed and eyelashes long. Hues of tans and pinks wove to make her up, the word ‘Kitten’ written in small cursive at the corner of the piece, right beside his usual violent ‘Vante’. A choked laugh escaped her lips as Hoseok approached her, cursing as he tugged off his jacket to wrap it around her bare legs. “Hobi that's me-” Y/n whispered, as Hoseok stood up.

“Yeah, it is. You know Vante, don't you.” Hoseok hummed, and Y/n nodded. Before she could apologize for keeping him in the dark, her phone rang. ‘tae ♥︎’ her phone read, and Y/n sighed, eyes watering.

“Hello?” She answered.

“Do you like it?”

A choked sob escaped her lips, and Hoseok was quick to wrap her in his arms, ignoring the chill on his skin.

“Taehyung, why did you- It's so beautiful I don't deserve it-”

“If you didn't deserve it I wouldn't have made it.” Taehyung hummed, voice rough with lack of sleep. “I wanted to make something for my favorite girl. I figured it's a more creative way to ask you out other than just taking you out to dinner.” He muttered.

Y/n gasped. “Like, be your girlfriend ask me out?” Taehyung laughed softly.

“Like be my girlfriend ask you out, Kitten.”

Y/n sniffled, wiping her eyes. She gazed up at the piece again, and smiled widely, nearly splitting her face. She looked up at Hoseok, who smiled down at her knowingly.

“Of course I’ll be your girlfriend.”

masterlist

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supernatural-book · 5 years

Text

Second Chances

Title: Second Chances

Pairing: Gadreel x Reader (my first not sam, cas or dean fic!)

Word Count: 1,591

Summary: Gadreel is trying to get the boys to trust him, and while they don’t, the reader believes they should give him a second chance, and stands up for him during the conversation. Gadreel isn’t used to people seeing past his mistakes.

A/N: Hey, sorry if it’s not all following canon. It’s been a while since I watched this season, but I really wanted to try to put the reader into the show, and so this is kind of changing the canon plot. Oh well. Also, this is unedited. I’ll check in tomorrow to reread it, but I’m about to pass out.

Over your years with the boys, you've met many different people- seeing people come and go after hunts were over was part of the job, but you're never met someone quite like this angel. All the angels you have encountered, with the exception of a select few, were completely royal dicks. But this angel whose name had only recently been revealed to be Gadreel, was different.

You knew his story. After learning who he was, you sat with Cas, listening to him tell you Gadreel's whole, infamous tale. You couldn’t imagine the guilt he must feel after what happened. He’d spent thousands of years in Heaven’s prison after being tricked by Lucifer and letting him into the Garden. He’d been dishonored, and his mistake had led to Humanity being corrupted. And now, once God’s most trusted, he stood before you asking for redemption.

“You don't trust me, fine. I understand. I've...made mistakes. But haven't you? Haven't we all?” His words struck a familiar chord inside you. You have made mistakes. What were you thinking, about to deny him his chance at redemption, when you had been in his shoes before? Your arms uncrossed, your stance relaxing. He looked back and forth between the boys, and his eyes settled on you for only a moment longer. “At least give me a chance.” You exchanged glances with the boys. None of them seemed to care, but you stepped forward.

“I’ll give him a chance.” The three of the boys looked over to you in shock, as if they couldn’t believe you would even consider. Gadreel locked eyes with you, and you could feel a wave of pity wash over you. He truly meant well, you could tell.

“Really?” Dean sounded as if you had just betrayed him. It hurt you, but you believe in second chances. You turned to Dean.

“How many times have you or Sam or Cas fucked up or worked for the wrong person, and needed a second chance? Hell, even a third chance! Why is it any different now?” They boys exchanged glances.

“He lied to us. He told us his name was Ezekiel!” Dean raised his voice, and you stood taller, defending your ground.

“Of course he did! If he would have said he was Gadreel, you would have never trusted him in the first place! Sam would probably still be in the hospital! Remember when Cas lied to us? Or what about recently when you lied to Sam about what was happening in his own body? How is anything we’ve done any better than Gadreel lying about his identity?” Dean took a step towards you, furious now.

“He’s working for Metatron!”

“He was. And he wants to help us now!” You glanced at Gadreel, who nodded in response. “Think of how much help he could be. He already helped Sam get better and he resurrected Cas and Charlie for fucks sake! I think he deserves a second chance.” The boys seemed to relax, only slightly.

“What about what he did to Kevin?” Sam forced the words out. You took a shaky breath.

“Well, that I won't forgive. I can't. But I'm sure he regrets that.” Dean still didn't seem pleased with this answer. It's the mark. You told yourself. Dean would normally be more open to giving people another chance. He saw Gadreel kill Kevin, and now the only thing that matters to him is that Gadreel pays for it. “Guys, you always say you trust my guesses. It’s like, my sixth sense. So trust me this one time.” Finally, Cas stepped forward.

“I agree with (Y/N). Gadreel truly wants to do the right thing.” Silence settled in the bunker while Sam and Dean considered this. You smiled at Cas, thankful that someone was finally hearing you. It felt like another million years before Sam sighed.

“Alright, (Y/N), I’ll trust you.” You smiled, and looked over to Gadreel. He was watching you with a look of pure thankfulness in his eyes. You almost melted seeing the man who was so desperate to be redeemed that he was willing to risk his life. Suddenly, all eyes landed on Dean. He still didn’t look happy, but he took a step towards Gadreel, holding his hand out in what you assumed to be acceptance.

You assumed incorrectly.

It all happened so quickly. With Dean holding Gadreel’s hand tightly in his own, he lunged forward, revealing the First Blade. Before you could even process what was happening, there was a large gash in Gadreel’s torso, and he was stumbling back. “Dean!” Sam and Cas rushed forward to stop him from inflicting any more pain onto the angel. They held Dean back, and you cringed at the feral noises he was making. Sam looked at you and nodded in Gadreel’s direction. Knowing that Sam and Cas had Dean under control, you turned to help Gadreel, but were shocked to find out he wasn’t there. Your first instinct was to follow the bloody handprints on the wall. He must have stumbled outside, holding the cut on his chest in pain.

You picked up your pace and exited the bunker. There was no way you were letting him get away. Not after building up your trust like that.

“Gadreel!” You called as soon as you came in contact with the world outside the bunker. You heard quiet grunting and saw him leaning all of his weight onto the tree not far from the entrance of the bunker. “Gadreel.” You reached out to him, supporting him and lowering him to the ground slowly. “Cas will come out and heal you, don’t worry.” He looked up at you, his eyes full of awe, as if he couldn’t believe someone was being nice to him. After a few moments, he opened his mouth.

“Why did you come after me? Why do you trust me?” You paused, thrown off by the question. How do you answer to something like that? Here he was, lying injured in the grass and asking you to explain the reason you found a way to give him a second chance. Asking you to bear your heart to him. You sat down on the ground next to him.

“Will you be okay until the boys comes out?”

“I will.” He was obviously in pain, but there wasn’t anything you could do at the moment but wait for Cas to come out and heal him.

“Well, um, to answer your question…” You met his eyes and found it difficult to hold eye contact. “I think you really do want to help us. And I believe you deserve to redeem yourself.” He didn’t say anything, so you continued, your hand absentmindedly playing with the string of the hoodie he wore under his jacket. “I don’t think the events that you were punished for were your fault. I don’t think you deserved that.” You waited for a few moments and he still didn’t respond. He watched you in silence with soft green eyes. You couldn’t pinpoint the emotion behind them, but what you could see was surprise and a hint of awe. “Please say something.”

"You really believe I am innocent? You do realize that the blame for all of the world's sins can fall on me, do you not?”

“Well, I wasn’t there, of course. But, from what I’ve heard, it sounds like you were manipulated. So yes, I don’t think you deserved the sentence you received. The boys may not believe me, but I’ve seen you heal my friends, hell, even animals! You’re a good person, Gadreel.” He was quiet for a few moments, but this time it was different. Whereas before it was a troubled, awkward silence, this time he looked happy. “I believe in second chances..”

“(Y/N).” You took in the way his lips pronounced your name, realizing it was the first time he had spoken directly to you. “I am wholeheartedly thankful.” He spoke with the same polite, serious tone he’d always used, but there was something different there. Something more intimate. As if there was a friendship sparking between you two already, as if you had finally gotten him to open up to you, as if he felt like someone finally cared for him. It was sad to think about, but after thousands of years in prison, he must have lost faith in himself. He must have come out craving redemption, and had forgotten what it feels like for someone else to finally care about him. “Now I promise you, I will not let you down.” You smiled.

“Good.” Before you could say anything else, Cas and Sam came out. Cas kneeled next to Gadreel and reached out to heal the injured angel.

“No. Your Grace. Healing me will only weaken you.” Gadreel pleaded. You smiled. You were right, and almost felt like turning to Sam and saying ‘See? He is good.’ But for now, you’d just keep it to yourself. You gave Gadreel a hand and helped him to his feet, and he lent you a smile smile in appreciation. It warmed your heart to see him show happiness. Ever since you’d known him, he seemed to only think about redemption, honor, and the mistakes he made. You were glad you were able to lift the weight from him. There was so much more you wanted to tell him, so much more you wanted to teach him about human customs, so much more you wanted to do with him. But unfortunately, there were more important things at hand right now. Maybe tomorrow you’d hold his hand more. Even give him a hug.

You smiled. Yeah, tomorrow.

Taglist!

@thecurlyhairedwinchester, @solis200213, @music-lockscreen, @bella-ca, @totally-not-gadreel (here ya go!)

#tomorrow he dies #woops #spoilers?#first gadreel fic!#supernatural x reader #spn #gadreel #gad #supernatural #x reader #reader insert #gadreel x reader #gadreel x you #gadreel x y/n #imagine dragons #songfic

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jisunwithtaeandkookie · 5 years

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I walked home in the cold night, it having been a busy day at work. Well, not exactly busy, just weird: all kinds of people came in everyday. Today a girl came in looking all kinds of confused, and the reason, which she told when I asked, was weird too: she was worried she was going to mess her order up. That's like the safest thing to mess up if you know my story, I very clearly remembered thinking to myself at that moment.

I pulled my coat closer to me as I walked more swiftly. It was a really cold night.

It had been a very uneventful week for me, and by uneventful I meant quiet. I didn't really have any friends here, all my friends were back in my hometown. Well, I had friends here, but I actually didn't deserve to call them my friends anymore.

I passed by a building with a big screen on it, and being displayed on the screen was the group which everyone gave their full attention to and I was trying to avoid.

I stopped, focusing my gaze on the screen.

Looking at their happy faces gave me a sense of happiness and then nostalgia. I wondered if they were okay. I wondered, because I actually didn't know..I couldn't. Over the past week, I had tried to find out, but it hadn't gone exactly as I planned. All because every one of those seven had a different opinion, a different way of looking at things. It was both a gift and a curse for me, as there were some people who didn't want to see or talk to me, and some who wanted to but at the same time didn't want to, while there were also some who didn't blame me at all.

Were they going to be okay?

The picture on the screen changed, and now it showed the picture of a recently debuted but very famous girl group. I smiled as I stared at the picture of the gorgeous looking girls: were they having a bad day as me, or did they have no trouble at all?

"What a coincidence." I heard a voice beside me, and immediately recognised my best friend's voice. Hearing it gave me mixed emotions...for a second I didn't know how to react, or what I should do. They don't even teach this stuff in schools; it's all French Revolution and all kinds of different equations which, by the way, are going to have no use in everyday life in spite of what our teachers say. This is what they should teach. This is the important stuff.

"Kookie." I decided to turn around and look at him. He had a cap on which covered half of his face (oh, so he was intending to go incognito) which he immediately pushed up to reveal his whole face, showing a look of surprise evident on his sharp features.

"Y/N-ah!" He said, his voice a little dull. "What are you doing here?"

"I thought you knew I was here." I frowned.

"No I just...stopped to look." He looked back up at the screen with the girl group displaying on it. Oh, so that was what he stopped for, not for me. Not everything is about you, you know. I was such a selfish person sometimes.

I looked at the screen, following his gaze, before dropping my gaze down to him after a second. "See something you like?"

He gave a dull, emotionless laugh, looking down. "Not something I like," he looked up at me. "But yeah, now I do."

"Is everything good between you guys?" The question came out involuntarily, and I was dumbfounded at how socially inept I was. "I'm sorry if that question is awkward to answer at the moment." I said, trying to correct myself.

"No, it's not." He replied.

"Did you...answer my question or my apology?"

He looked sideways. "Both, actually."

"I'm sorry." I said, not knowing what else to say. My eyes began to water.

"Stop saying that now, really." He said, stepping closer. "Don't blame yourself too much. Why don't you give yourself a break?" He gave me a brief smile.

"I will when all of you are okay." I said. He opened his mouth but closed it back after a second, sighing.

"Will you?" I asked again.

"We will." He looked back up at the screen which was showing the picture of BTS again. "We'll be okay."

"How are you so sure?" I asked. "Did they forgive you?"

He shook his head. "No, but...I don't know, we just will. Somehow."

I smiled. "Because you aren't a group...you're family."

He smiled, nodding. "Yeah. Yeah, we are." He cocked his head to the side, letting his normal, childish self come out a little. "I'd like to believe that, but...I just don't know, Chocolate. I don't know if things are ever going to be like they used to. Even if everything's okay...I don't know if it's going to be like before."

The look in his eyes was killing me; I hadn't seen him as sad as this ever before. He had lost his hyungs, who had made him what he was today; I had so easily taken it all away from him. Even though I didn't know this many secrets were being hidden in the group, I was the centre of all this: the root cause of all the branching problems.

"It will...I promise you." I gulped down the tears that were choking my throat. "Once I leave your lives." I whispered slowly.

"Chocolate, you can't-"

"I'm sorry Kookie, I have to." I smiled ruefully. "This is the only way. It's either me, or them."

"Don't make me choose, Y/N. I can't."

"I'm not making you choose. I'm telling you they are more important right now, and I'm saying we need to take a break from our friendship."

"I can't live without you, Chocolate." He said. His eyes were watering up as well. "I can't live without you telling me how your day went, I can't live without you calling me in the middle of the night because you had this crazy idea for a prank. I can't live without you telling everyone about my embarrassing moments in high school while I try to shut your mouth up. I can't live without you pestering me everyday about any girl I look at, and I can't live with the fact that I can't talk to you in my darkest moments..when I need you, you won't be there...I can't live with that." His voice cracked.

"I'm not going anywhere, Kook." I smiled a little between the tears that were starting to fall down. "I promise you, I'll be here. I'll message you everyday...I'll tell you about how my day went, I'll tell you about every idea that I have. I'll ask you every question that I have. But...you just can't message me back."

"Y/N-" he gasped.

"This is not a request, Kook." I said in a stern yet soft tone. "Promise me."

He stared at me for a moment, then nodded. "Okay, Y/N...I'll do it for my best friend."

I smiled. He returned it back, and stepped forward. He was going to give me a hug, I knew it.

"Jungkook...here you are! I've been looking all over for you." Tae's voice came from behind, and I immediately turned my back to him. "What's taking you so long?" My lower lip quivered as I couldn't control my emotions at hearing his voice.

"I was just looking at...that." Jungkook pointed at the picture on the screen, which had changed back to the other group.

"SEAZONS...hmm..well, I wish hyung was here to see this." Tae laughed a little. I bit my lip to keep myself from breaking down; I longed to talk to my friend, to my Taehyung.

Jungkook looked at me for a second, not letting Tae know that he was looking at me, or that it was me. "Hmm..let's go."

"Yeah, sure." I heard Tae walking away, and Jungkook, sighing, followed him after a second. From somewhere far away, I could hear Spring's beautiful voice coming into my ears...it had become my favourite song these days.

"Now that you know, wherever you go, Everytime you think about me. I know your words, you know it hurts, Everytime you think about me."

I hung my head low. Tears started falling from my eyes, and I stood there, sobbing, helpless, alone.

All of a sudden, I felt someone hugging me from behind, and immediately knew it was Jungkook. I turned to him to hug him back, sobbing lightly.

"I'll miss you, Y/N-ah," he said, his voice telling me he was about to break down himself. "I hope we'll meet soon."

I looked up at him and nodded. He gave me a reassuring smile, and gave me a little peck on my forehead, before whispering lightly.

"No more secrets."

I gave a little laugh. He gave me his patented bunny smile despite the tears in his eyes, and ran to catch up to Tae, who was completely oblivious to the fact that Jungkook had run back to me.

I couldn't let them break at any cost. Even if it meant me going away from their lives forever, I wouldn't hesitate for a second. The time I had spent with them was beautiful; those memories weren't going anywhere anyway. So it was time for me to go. For the greater good.

"Don't be broken because of me." I whispered, looking at Taehyung and Jungkook, the two members of the most famous 'family' of the world.

Can You Keep A Secret? Pt.11

Part 10//Part 11//Part 12

SERIES MASTERLIST

Next part coming up on 29th November at 17:30 GMT. Stay updated, and happy reading!

Summary: Your close friend Taehyung, shares a secret with you, a big secret: You have had a crush on Jimin for the past 6 years. But what he doesn't know is that you have done something bigger than that, something that could destroy many people's lives in seconds. That's a secret for you to keep. But something even bigger is floating in the air: what you have done could destroy BTS's friendship forever...but that's a secret even you don't know yourself.

Pairing: Reader × Jimin/Taehyung ft. Other Members

Genre: Angst (varies with each part)

A/N: The lyrics used here are not from any song, they are my own lyrics from a song that I wrote.

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justgotham · 7 years

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Not since the Joker and Harley Quinn has Gotham City seen a not-quite couple so villainous and yet so ‘ship-worthy as Butch Gilzean and Tabitha Galavan. But can these two crazy, murderous kids ever find true love together?

With “Gotham’s” final Season 3 arc underway, questions linger as to whether two of the pre-Batman-set series’ original creations — the loyal-to-a-fault mob henchman, and the whip-cracking Catwoman prototype — share a bond deep enough to qualify as love. Actors Drew Powell and Jessica Lucas recently joined the press for a peek at the Butch/Tabby almost-romance, and whether it actually might have a future,

On what’s ahead for them and where their loyalties lie:

Drew Powell: Whoever he’s with is probably going to win. That’s been the case of late, until they don’t. I think the back half of this season is all about Butch and Tabitha. For Butch, it’s about Tabitha. He’s head over heels in love with this girl, for better or for worse, and he’s trying to convince her that Barbara’s no good for her, Barbara doesn’t care about her, and that Barbara doesn’t deserve her loyalty. So it’ll be this evolution of him trying to explain that to her. Hopefully for her sake, she figures it out before it’s too late.

Jessica Lucas: She’s still furious at Nygma for cutting off her hand. As the alliance between Nygma and Barbara grows, I think it makes her more and more furious as time goes on. You’re going to see her really pushed, and really, really upset, and that’s going to keep growing and growing, and the tension between her and Barbara is going to keep growing and growing, and eventually will have to play out in some way, come to a head in some way.

On whether the fractures in their Barbara Kean relationship will prompt either Butch or Tabitha to make their own play for the top spot:

Lucas: I don’t think so. Not right now. She wasn’t raised that way. Coming from the Galavan family, she’s used to loyalty. She’s the protector, right? She’s a bodyguard of sorts. So I don’t think she has as much desire for power as a lot of the other villains do – which is interesting, because most of them are vying for the throne, but she doesn’t really care about that. She’s too reverent to care about that.

She’s smart enough to know that alliances are important. You don’t want to piss off the wrong people. She’s a bit more of a snake in the grass that way… I think we could both teach Barbara some things. Barbara’s a little bit too self-involved at the moment to be too concerned about helping anyone else. I think by the end of the season, Tabitha will be in a really vulnerable place. So she’s needing to start again. That’s sort of where that alliance comes from, or how it starts to form.

Powell: Here’s the thing: Butch had a moment at top in Season 2, and he didn’t like it. The whole point of Butch is, he’s a survivor. He grew up in Gotham, he knows the nooks and crannies, he knows all the buttons to push, he knows the dark corners, and he knows enough to know that if you’re on top, there’s a much greater chance that you’re going to get knocked down.

I think that’s one of the cool things about he and Tabitha and their bond, is that she’s kind of the same way. She always works better as an off-sider, as a second in command, because she can kind of work in the shadows and creep. So that connection between the two of them I thought was really neat, and great job on the writers’ part. So what I hope to see moving forward is to find out that backstory. Who is Butch really? Who is this guy? Where does he come from? What’s his story? He’s got this random nephew, Sonny. What’s he really about? I’m hopeful that’ll be the case going forward.

On the actual depth of Tabitha’s feelings for Butch:

Lucas: I don’t know that she knows what real love or intimacy really is… But loyalty is so important to her, so for Barbara to turn on her any way, or to be disloyal — that’s where her affection lies, so if that doesn’t exist, there is none. For Butch, I think that she has a lot of affection. He’s like a puppy dog. It’s an unrequited kind of love. I think she’s cares about him more than she lets on.

As Fish Mooney returns yet again, will she pose a challenge for Butch’s ties to Tabitha:

Powell: When she came back the first time – other than when he ran away when the ghost Fish showed up – there’s really no interaction between the two of them. [Now], there’s a scene that we shot that we’re all in. I feel like there’s this closure that’s needed. So we try to address that a little bit when she comes back this time. I think the fans will appreciate it. I would have liked to really get into that. But yeah, there’s this particular scene that I think people will dig.

On the joys of building characters without comic book backstories and fan expectations:

Powell: I took Bruno Heller at his word when he said early on, he’s like, “Look, this Butch character’s going to take time, and he’s going to grow, and people are going to underestimate him until it’s too late. There’s going to be a life here, you’re just going to have to trust me.”

It’s been fun because I’ve kind of known, particularly at the beginning, I knew what was coming, but fans didn’t. So they’re like, ‘This henchman…” Then to see them slowly — I see these Tweets, they’re like, “I don’t know if it’s weird, but I’m really starting to like Butch.” “I can’t believe I’m saying this, but Butch it one of my favorite characters.” It’s like each one of those was like a fist bump for me, like, “Yes!”

I think Butch would be a great fit for the comics. I think he would be a great addition to any parts of the canon, because he’s written from that. There is this element of him. How is there not a Butch doll? He’s got the hand, he’s got the scar, he’s got the suits, he’s got the gun. How is there not a freaking Funko with a bazooka? I don’t get it. I do not get it! They’re missing the boat. Hopefully it’ll come.

Lucas: I very much modeled her after Catwoman, honestly, because I was told that she was the precursor to Catwoman and that there was going to be a mentorship there. So I wanted to take elements of that character, especially physically, so that when you looked at her, you thought, “Huh, kind of reminds me of Catwoman.”

But then everything else, as far as developing Tabitha Galavan, I just took things as they came. I’m really, really open to whatever the writers want to write and bring to it. I don’t feel as much of a responsibility as I think some of the other actors do to get these things right, these elements right from the comics. I don’t really have that feeling.

#Butch Gilzean #Drew Powell #Tabitha Galavan #Jessica Lucas

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thekevinwright · 5 years

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My First Round of Agency Submissions Has Ended in Failure (But I Won't Give Up)

As someone who has always known rejection, it wasn’t anything new. However, with my quest to find theatrical, commercial and commercial print representation here in Los Angeles, I can’t say I wasn’t somewhat disappointed. I sent out over 40 emails followed up by additional forward emails. After all was said and done, I had struck out over 80 times over the course of 2 weeks.

When I tell you my motivation and self-confidence took a hit, it was like being ran over by a truck. This massive amount of failure in such little time had spilled over into my personal life: missed auditions, trying to stay tucked away from all life, and just dive into content creation. Because if I create my own content, and projects, that’ll show all them right?

That’s what I thought, but recently I remembered something my dad would always say while I was growing up: Failure is the First Attempt In Learning. When I came to terms with my dad’s lessons, I called him up and thanked him. Then we had a 2 hour conversation on the phone.

I had struck out over 80 times over the course of 2 weeks.

So, if it was the first attempt, what did I learn? I learned several things from taking my job seriously, caring about my appearance, getting past self-confidence issues that started in high school, internal motivation vs external motivation and a lesson on integrity.

Self-Confidence (Getting Out of My Own Way)

I’m someone who has had difficulties in my life. I was heavily bullied in high school, which has caused lasting effects in my life. The town that I grew up in had an extremely active KKK sect in the 1920’s and 1930’s. Not to give a history lesson, but as we are coming up on a decade of activity, and some of the grandparents are still alive that were in the group had passed down those feelings down to their descendants. Some of these people that have that sort of mindset nowadays have stayed in their city, never venturing out too far from their comfortable zone.

Since I was different, I felt the need to work harder than even the hardest worker in the room, talk about the goals that I have in life, and made a point to be friendly with everybody. That didn’t go so well. I felt that I had no one to talk to; parents, teachers, and peers were against me. At one point, I was so depressed, that my school put me into counseling. Rejections from women I liked, and negative re-enforcement were the norm for every day of my high school life. I even had one woman say that dating me would “ruin their reputation.”

That was about 10 years ago. Now: I have a degree in Fitness & Sports Management, I played college football, I joined the great Iota Phi Theta Fraternity, Inc., traveled to multiple cities (even New York City where I lived for a time), moved to LA and I’ve become an actor. I’ve also had one girlfriend, but who’s keeping track?

With new experiences once I’ve left my hometown, my self-confidence soared. I was still the hardest worker in the room, but now I was also extremely talkative, and laughing, whereas before, I was moody, and serious.

To sum everything up, I had gotten out of my own way, and had to remind myself that every now and then, especially with my previous stint with homelessness. With the rejections from the managers, all those negative feelings came back to the surface.

Now, I feel the need to say that they didn’t directly cause it, but I subconsciously attached them to the high school bullies. Which is extremely unfortunate, and I feel bad for. But because of my recent self-reflection, and epiphanies, I realize that I may not be a good fit for them for various reasons. Which brings me to…

Caring About My Appearance

It goes without saying that the entertainment industry cares about appearances. These are people who will be portraying heroic, and villainous characters, with some of them even being gods, and getting paid the big bucks for it. If you’d like to know the average amount that people get paid on syndicated TV shows, not including negotiations, and everything else, that number comes out to be about $20,000 a week. That is literally life-changing money right there.

But, in order to make money like that, they give it to those that look the part. Go into an audition, kill the audition, and the callbacks, get booked, and the show gets ordered for a season (or two, or 9 like Wild ‘n Out). When you look at the lead characters and even some of the supporting characters on shows, they look like they’re born with great genetics, chiseled features, and can never do wrong, unless the plot dictates it so.

We know real life is different. At my heaviest, I was 310 pounds, and even when I was homeless, I didn’t care much for going to the gym, because I was so unmotivated to do anything else but survive. I put on a good 30 pounds when I was living in my car last year. Buffets, fast food, and water were the norm. But now, things are different.

I have an apartment now, I don’t work at my physically exhausting and extremely strenuous day job anymore, and most importantly, I’ve lost weight. On April 15th, 2019 I weighed 301.2 pounds. Now, I’m at 281 pounds. I was tired of my belly protruding through my shirt so much, and I was tired of always being tired.

I now practice portion control, I limit fast food intake to less than 1 meal a week, and I don’t buy so much food. In an effort to help my cooking, and keep my food bill low, I’ve started buying ramen (yes, that college ramen we’re so used to), but I always use spices and fresh ingredients congruently with it. Heck, I just buy the regular, no meat or veggie flavor ramen so that I can use the most ingredients. But I rarely eat them, and will eat them if I’m not in the mood to cook, or need a quick meal to eat.

I train at my local 24 hour fitness 5 times a week, and do active recovery on my rest days. When I do cardio, I kick the treadmill into a -30% decline, and the speed to about 4.5. Right near the end of the cardio session, I burn myself out by turning the treadmill to a 70% incline, and increasing the speed to 6.5. By the end, I’m sprinting on the treadmill, with sweat flying all over with a satisfying gulp of fresh air afterwards and a heaping scoop of whey.

I’m sleeping a lot more, eating a lot less, and learn as much as I can about looking and feeling good every day. I care about myself, and who I am when I walk out the front door every morning. It’s a nice change of pace. All of this has come from me comparing…

Internal Motivation vs. External Motivation

I have so much positive re-enforcement nowadays it’s scary. I’ve got so many people saying great things about me, and I’m getting compliments from girls and guys alike almost every day. I’ve had an acting buddy of mine tell me that she’s impressed with my persistence, and another tell me that I have the most untapped potential out of anybody that she’s ever known. Quite big shows to fill. But I never truly believed myself to be the person they were talking about. After all, I was someone with self-esteem issues, and felt I was broken. But their compliments motivated me to continue moving forward.

Tyrhee, for instance has always told me about creating my own content again. Shooting, editing, posting and all that. But for the longest, I felt that I was inadequate and couldn’t bring myself to the level that he’s currently at. Although I had reservations, I started writing content again. It was difficult because that creative muscle hadn’t been used for so long. Plus, who was going to shoot my content? I was a person with only 4,600 Instagram followers. But Tyrhee assured me that it’d be okay. One of the reasons he gave was that I had shot so many flames for him and others that they had said “when you shoot, let me know, and I’ll be in it.” I didn’t believe them, until I shot my first piece of content about a month ago.

People held the camera for me, and I was able to direct them on how to shoot, on top of Tyrhee being in it, and also helping me punch up the script. It was a great experience, and the one experience I truly needed to realize that I’m no longer alone in my quest to work my way up the entertainment ladder. I had a new support system here in LA that wasn’t based on familial ties.

Working my way through my issues, shooting, writing, and producing my own content, plus not liking who I saw in the camera or in the mirror caused the external motivation of others to eventually become my own internal motivation. I started working out hard, caring about my appearance, my brand, and not wanting to be a weak link.

I’m waking up early these days, make sure to get a training session in (yesterday, I reduced my 2 hour workout to 30 minutes with 10 minutes of cardio and ab twists and kicked up the intensity to near limit-pushing levels), work as much as I can, and submit to casting notices. I gotta look like someone who will get booked, if I want these agents and managers to take me seriously. Thankfully, this has started teaching me about…

Integrity

I’m always trying to do my best, but because of so many things going on, stuff falls through the cracks. Missed auditions, missed bookings (even though they’re just background roles), and stuff life throws at you.

Recently, I shot a radio show for a working acting friend of mine. Everything was great during the show. Afterwards though, it was all excuses for why I didn’t have it edited. That weekend was an extremely heavy shooting weekend for Tyrhee and I, where we knocked out about 15 sketches after everything was said and done. I forgot all about the radio show, but then I started getting it done Monday night. Then came the very annoying situation of the editing software I had not being able to bulk-render videos, since the guy told me break it up into segments. Then I lost my prized Duo-Link, which is still a critical step in my workflow, and making sure people can get their footage. I said that I would get it to him Monday, and by the time he had the files, it was Thursday. Not a great look if I do say so myself.

If I couldn’t stay on top of stuff like that, would that transfer over to my acting? I’m inclined to say yes. I wouldn’t sign me either with that old mindset, with an emphasis on procrastination.

My friend with the radio show told me that he does what he says. With everything that’s going on in his life that he tells me about, from his projects to his radio show to his content creation, I’ve never once thought that his integrity is an issue. He had so much motivation to push forward that he puts my own integrity to shame. But he and I had a deep conversation about that, where I had asked him about it. When people say that actors don’t help each other, that’s a big fat lie.

The talk we had flipped a switch in my head about everything that I was doing wrong. I was overextending myself, and trying to do everything but nothing at the same time. For the first time, I had realized that I was forcibly holding myself back from the potential that the person say they saw in me. That night, I gave him updated files and he had the full set of his radio show in his hands, edited and ready to be posted.

It’s still a challenge, but I’m giving myself realistic deadlines now and if it’s ever too much, I’ll let people know, and I’ll also say no if I don’t want to do something. This all boils down to the most important thing…

Taking My Job Very Seriously

To be an actor is to shoulder extreme rejection, and going through emotional highs and extreme emotional lows - including depression. But, it’s the path that I felt like was naturally chosen for me.

The A-Listers of my industry got to where they are because they care about their craft. They care about entertaining millions, and some even give back by creating acting schools, or charity. They care about the betterment of the world through entertainment. They’ve interalized their lines, and do extensive workout programs to keep themselves in icon shape.

A great person that displays these qualities is Dwayne Johnson. He admitted to depression and confidence issues, but continually strives to be his best self. Another person is my friend Tyrhee Spivey. He recently had that switch flipped, and has been pushing himself so incredibly hard it’s impressive.

Closing Thoughts

I’ve learned these lessons at the time when I started looking for representation. They weren’t easy or comfortable to learn by any means, and I was pretty frustrated when everything was going down. But, after a month of concentrated effort, and a newfound willingness to make mistakes, I know my second round of agency submissions are going to be better.

Comments Question of the Post: What are some of your failures, and what have you done to work past it?

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