#the only person who wants me around for the holidays is my dad and ive got such a weird relationship with him | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

space-man2 · 4 months

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January Update

We look forward to a new year full of male-to-male body swaps, possessions, transformations, and other means of taking someone’s body for control! Despite a busy schedule, I am pleased to say that the last month of 2023 has been productive, with 26 shorts, stories, and chapter series. Stories on Discord now total 243 unique and compelling tales! As stated before, most of last month’s stories have a general theme based on the winning vote from my star subscribers. And it’s “Blessed/Cursed Gifts,” a story theme perfect for the holidays. Read these tales in the following shorts and stories.

✅ – SFW | 🔞 – NSFW | 🔒 – Subscriber Access

•·················•·················•

🔒🔞 Give me Back my Body "Fucker! Give me back my body!" Stan shouted when he saw his stolen body showering in the public gym. He didn't want to hurt his body, but damn! Seeing that asshole jerking off with his stolen cock made Stan see nothing but red.

🔒🔞 Replica I couldn't contain my excitement as I unwrapped my gift — a bodysuit replica of my cousin, Lee.

🔒🔞 Torturing My Brother Wasn’t the Gift I wished to torture my brother better and to be the only son. It seemed like an impossible dream, but the crone said she could do just that.

🔒🔞 Android Virus Outbreak Reports are coming in that android companions around Korea have been installed with personality modifying virus that turns them into sex-crazed and rabid maniacs. Take refuge in your rooms and barricade your doors. And hope to the almighty that there's a Police officer that could help you.

🔒🔞 Holiday gift What better gift to his boyfriend than ropes, a gag, and his homophobic uncle?

🔒🔞 It’s the damn Bodysuit’s Fault My boyfriend doesn’t want to have sex with me anymore, and it’s that damn bodysuit’s fault!

🔒🔞 The VR Headset I received a VR headset that lets me play a game that's a little too realistic.

✅ Apologies for Missing the Holiday [Tranformation]

🔒🔞 The Enchanted Camera [Bodysuit]

Other Stories

🔒🔞 The Demon Inside part 2 Commissioned by Valagon37 When the slivers of libido faded in his last set of hosts, the incubi, Valagon Raug, uses his demonic magick and charms to seduce a new batch of hosts in the modern world. With the promise of fame, money, and boundless pleasures, Alex, Chase, William, and Jared were lured easily into Valagon's world.

🔒🔞 Chapter IV: Left Alone Val leaves Alex and Chase for a demons-only event, leaving Alex and Chase competing on who Val loves more.

🔒🔞 Chapter V: William While in the event, Valagon’s desires prey on the husk of his rival demon. He’d hit two birds with one stone by making that handsome hunk his and pissing off his long-time rival.

🔒🔞 Chapter VI: Jared Val’s old cult comes with fresh meat to satisfy their lord’s unbound desires.

🔒🔞 Chapter VII: The Four Husks The daily shenanigans between Valagon’s four husks.

🔒🔞 Prison Payback Prisons have their rules. This prison has them, but the most important was you don’t fuck with Jason and his crew. The new inmate would soon learn why this was so.

🔒🔞 The Fun Barely Started All I wanted was to play an old video game from my youth. I didn't expect to be transported into the game and played by a man with sick and perverted fantasies.

🔒🔞 Bro Stole My Body I’ve always been a piece of shit to my younger brother. I mean well. I wanted him to be a football player like our dad and uncles. But that interest in nerdy ass book clubs makes him the black sheep of this family. If only I knew the measures he would take after pushing him so hard, then I would have pushed him at all.

✅ If You Were a Little Smaller "I told you, didn't I? If you were a little smaller, there won't be a day without my cock inside your asshole." Rhys said while he was in my body.

✅ Why I Named my Pecs “Jacob & Josh” It irks me when people put names on their muscles. Still... I gave my pecs names. It may seem hypocritical, but I have a story to justify why I named them "Jacob & Josh."

Other Shorts

✅ Skinny Dipping [Possession]

🔞 The Eyes Aren’t the Window to the Soul [Possession]

🔒🔞 Still Not Used to this Cock [Body Swap]

🔒🔞 No Return [Body Swap]

🔒🔞 Never Slept Naked [Possession]

🔒🔞 Comparison [Possession]

🔒🔞 Toning it Down [Possession]

🔒🔞 Stressed Out [Body Swap]

•·················•·················•

Head to my Discord and read these shorts and stories and 240+ other stories! If you want to access the NSFW stories, you can subscribe through my Ko-Fi and gain access to every story I’ve written. You can find the relevant links below.

We’ll welcome the new year by ditching story themes in favor of story scenarios. Based on the votes from Star Subscribers, the winning scenario is “My Friend Will Pilot Your Body.” See the main character befriend an invasive entity who will possess someone they know, be it a relative, a friend, a rival, or anybody. If you want to partake in the theme for February, join my discord and become a Star Subscriber🌟!

I thank my readers and subscribers for their continued support!

Access the Discord Server here >>> Link How to Subscribe >>> Link

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virtie333 · 4 months

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Day 30 - Life Day Damerey Celebration

Prompt: Life Day

Summary: Poe's thoughts of Life Day after personal loss

Notes: I wrote this the day after Christmas last year, the first Christmas without my mom, and it kind of sums up what the holiday was like for me that year. 2022 was by far the worst year of my life.

On the day before I posted this, I received a negative... well, not a review, but a comment... on one of my Modern AU stories.

It made me wonder how, when so many people are just trying to live their lives the best they can through horrors and depression and thoughts of suicide, why someone would take the time to hate on someone they don't even know. My writing and sharing of fanfiction has literally kept me going through all the above, so I want to thank those of you who take the time to say good things, nice things, and who understand exactly what I have been going through, because they have been there.

Thank you.

Warnings: Talk of the death of a loved one

AO3

Poe sat quietly by himself on the far side of the room, watching the many people that filled the space, but not seeing them.

He hadn’t wanted to come tonight, but Finn had begged him to, and he couldn’t deny the people he loved anything. Finn’s excuse was that it was the first Life Day since he and Rose had been married, and Poe supposed that was an okay thing to be happy about. Firsts were important. Your first Life Day married. Your first Life Day after a war. Your first Life Day after a child was born.

Your first Life Day since your father died.

Kes Dameron had passed away over ten standard months ago, and Poe had thought he was done grieving and mostly back to normal, but the holiday reminded him that normal would never be the same. He would never stop grieving. Not really. It would come and go, ebb and flow, but it would never end. As long as he loved his father, he would mourn his father.

Life Day had always been a big deal in the Dameron household. Even after his mother died, his father managed to keep the traditions they had all celebrated together the same. Only now did Poe realize how hard that must have been for his dad, and he knew the grieving man had only done it for Poe. Every year, Life Day was celebrated with traditional songs, foods, and gift giving. Even when Poe wasn’t home on Yavin IV, they still found time to connect and share with each other the events of the day. Only during the few years of the war had they not done this, if only because Poe didn’t dare contact his father; there was no way he was taking the chance that the First Order would find Kes and use him against Poe, who had been on their Most Wanted list for years.

But then the war had ended. Poe was able to go home, and he and his friends were able to celebrate Life Day together at the Dameron Homestead. Within two years, Poe was married, had become a prominent advisor for the New Republic’s Department of Defense, and had become a father. Life was perfect.

Until Kes informed Poe he had been diagnosed with lung cancer.

The doctors believed it was a result of Kes’ exposure to toxic gases used by the Empire during the Galactic Civil War. Though minimal, it had eventually caught up with him. Poe and his family took leave from their respective jobs and came to Yavin IV immediately. They were by Kes’ side when he died two weeks later.

Life had gone on. Slowly but surely, things became better. Poe had dealt with death many times. Two of his best friends, Muran and Snap, both died in their fighters right before his eyes. Commanders and those under his command, friends and former friends. The hardest death had been Leia’s, but the eminent attack from Palpatine’s fleet had prevented him from focusing too much on that loss until much later. He had loved them all in one way or another, but none had been his father.

Now it was Life Day, that special holiday that he and his father had always managed to share the same delight in. And now his father was gone.

He wasn’t mad at the people around him for celebrating. He wasn’t jealous of their joy. In reality, he simply felt nothing. No sorrow. No resentment. He was just… empty.

It was while the group in front of him started singing one of his favorite songs for Life Day, Gaudete, a familiar and beloved presence appeared next to him. He closed his eyes, letting the ancient High Galactic language play in his ears as the feeling of comfort and peace filled him. The Force. Sometimes he thought it was the only thing that had gotten him through the last few months.

He felt his wife, the bearer of that powerful Force energy, tuck her hand under his arm and lay her head on his shoulder. She he never strayed far from his side this past horrible year, despite the fact they both had obligations away from each other. Even when they were apart, if he started having a depressive episode, she would know, and come to him. She claimed she wasn’t using the Force to read his emotions, but that she could simply tell by his voice, his body language, the look in his eye even over a holocom. And when she was with him again, life became bearable once more.

Which told him that it wasn’t the Force that had kept him going.

It was Rey.

She never pushed him to talk, but she listened when he did. She never told him he should talk to a councilor, but she encouraged him when he chose to. She never pressured him to ‘just do it’ when he didn’t want to. She was his silent support, her strength and love palpable, even to a non-Jedi like him. He asked her once how she could still be there after so many months of his moodiness and disassociation. She reminded him that he had done the same for her during the months following Exegol. It was how she fell in love with him.

And as Poe felt her physical and mental warmth fill him, he realized with a strange certainty that he was falling in love with her, all over again.

He heard the familiar giggle of his daughter, and looked over to see Suralinda dancing to the music with the almost 2-year-old toddler in her arms. Little Leia had a huge smile on her face, her cheeks rosy red from the excitement of the evening. For the first time in days, Poe felt a real smile form on his lips, and a new determination in his heart.

He would grieve this first Life Day without his father, as was expected. But by next year, his little girl would start making memories of her own, and Poe was determined to make them as good as his own memories were.

He looked at his wife, letting is smile carry over to her. She smiled back, then picked up his hand and kissed the back of it. “Happy Life Day, Poe.”

“Happy Life Day, my love.”

#fanfiction #damerey #jedipilot #poe x rey #tw: death #life day #depression #comfort

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valleyfae · 2 years

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thinking about him. boyfriend's older brother who is a rockstar? forced breeding and lots of finger sucking and he LOVES humiliating. forced ball worship. spanks you with his drumsticks. bending you over any surface and humping you like a freak. he is very vocal very loud and into hair pulling both ways. love u x

also im loving the blog name

Thank you bub :( love you and am sending you many hugs

Oh gosh… rockstar!Bucky has me in a choke hold 24/7!!!!! Shy and quiet but secretly reads dark mafia pure smut books and fantasizes about getting aggressively gang-banged reader

I wasn’t planning for this to be a 1.1k word very slutty blurb-ish rant. What am I kidding, you can send me ‘dad’ and I’d flip out (I didn’t even re-read my sentences)

Feeling pressured to get into a relationship because all of your friends are in one. It’s not that you are 100% opposed to finding a hookup or even an exclusive relationship, but according to your friends, you “never spoke” and “shut down every single person who made a move or flirted in the slightest.”

Spring exams are over, and holiday around the corner, so you don’t have any convincing excuses to not go out with your friends.

Giving up, you hook up with the most annoying, vanilla, mundane personality of a tree stump, fratboy douche bag. You pray it doesn’t turn into something serious. Still, you don’t have the guts to decline when he invites you to his house for break, mainly because a couple of his friends will be staying over as well. He, as usual, gaslights you until you’re hiding in one of the bathrooms in his house, vigorously texting your best friend that you want to leave while your shitty boyfriend, who constantly cheats on you, and his friends get drunk downstairs.

He can’t stand his older brother. Partially because he is forty times more attractive than he is and also his thriving career as a drummer. As a teenager, he would make fun of his brother for how he dresses, listening to Deftones, Sonic Youth, and even fucking Nirvana, and mostly because he plays the drums and started a band with three of his friends. But now, he just shuts his mouth when around Bucky.

Walking downstairs, you think about walking out without collecting any of your things or saying a word.

“Come on, let’s just go. You said you wanted to go. It doesn’t matter if your brother’s playing there. He’s not going to be staying at your house anyways.”

Standing in the crowd, you’ve been left in a while your “boyfriend” and his friends do God knows what.

Yes, the other band members are hot, and there’s no doubt you’d let them use you like a worthless sex doll, but the tattoos, his shirt around his neck that exposes his perfect body, every single thing about him.

After their final song, you don’t move, just stand there, staring at Ben? Bucky? Brody? You can’t even remember his name, so infatuated by the perfectly sculpted man or maybe because your boyfriend who’s making out with a random girl refuses to talk about him.

“You doing okay there?” Bucky chuckles, bending down a bit to snap you out of your dreamy state. “Y/n, right? It’s Bucky, (I’m not putting a name because I can) ‘s older brother.”

IVE NEVER ONCE USED Y/N AND IM CRINGING AND THROWING UP

Fuck this I’m not trying in the slightest anymore and will rant and puke words elkjskska…

He brings you backstage to the private room he used to get ready. You’re hesitant but can’t resist. You sit on the couch awkwardly watching him as he wipes, then throws his sweaty black wife-beater on the table and lights a pre-roll. Bucky offers you his joint and smugly chuckles when you stumble to respond. “We got an innocent little one, now do we, bunny.” He starts conversation, but you can only respond with a nod and the occasional flustered hum. His eyes drop as you squirm in your seat and adjust your dress. “Not so innocent, huh? Flustered and humping the air like a needy slut” Bucky grins, gripping your thigh and slowly inching his hand past the hem of your dress…

Now for the said kinks >_<

Humiliation

Pulling up your dress and forcing your legs open, sliding his thick fingers through your folds, mocking you and collecting your wetness with his fingers. Rubbing your clit torturously slow, his pressure so light, but he can still feel the throbbing and heat radiating from your cunt, he brings his other hand to your face, fingers digging into your skin, and he forces your jaw to drop. Drool accumulates in your mouth; Bucky shoves his slick-covered digits down your throat. “Aw, you gonna be my dumb little whore? Want me to fuck you so bad, don’t you, bunny?” he slaps your face, nonchalantly gets up, and relights his joint. He sits not too far away from you on the couch. His thighs spread because MANSPREAD BUCKY I WANT TO SUCK YOUR COCK. His bulge is prominent, straining his black pants as he inhales the smoke. You wait for him to speak, just breathing heavily and rubbing your thighs together. Finally, he makes you strip and curses under his breath, palming himself over his jeans.

DONT LOOK AT ME RIGHT NOW IM HAVING A MOMENT… “Grab that pillow for me. Go on.” Bucky chuckles when you go and hand the pillow to him. “Always so clueless, huh? Haven’t been used before, is that right?” You respond with an embarrassed nod. “Well, then I know my needy little bunny will do just fine,” Bucky instructs you to sit back down on the couch but tells you to place the decorative pillow directly under you. “Don’t act dumb. Hump that pillow like you do after faking your orgasm. Hump that pillow like you do while thinking about getting fucked into oblivion, getting slapped and thrown around, go on.”

Hair pulling

Bucky is a sadist but has a little masochism in him as well. He gets so turned from your crying, tugging his hair from overstimulation as he slams into your cervix. The intoxicating pain from your nails digging into his skin or bitting his shoulder ensures him that he’s achieving his goal; to make you insane in the best way.

As much as he loves hearing your helpless whimper as you pull on his hair, he, even more, loves to clutch your hair as he roughly fucks your throat. Tears, makeup, and spit painted all over your face as he slams you down his cock with the grip on your hair.

What a perfect segue into ball worship and the good old faithful spit kink and maybe some rimming

Everything is messy. Spit, cum, tears, maybe even special water from his special water gun

He loves the spit that drips down your chest when you give him head. He loves the spit so much that he can’t contain himself and has to spit on your face and call you a “stupid little slut” and a “worthless messy whore”

What pushes Bucks over the edge is when you suck on his balls, innocently looking up at him as he holds your face down against him.

“Have you ever eaten ass before, bunny?”

Thrusting his hips and rocking against your face. He just can’t help but cum all over his chest and make you lick it up after tongue fucking his ass and sucking on his balls.

I could go on forever… breeding, spanking, voyeurism/exhibitionism, threesomes/foursomes, etc

Another I love you because I can <3 take care and don’t be mean to yourself you are the sweetest little angel ever <33

#fran's mail #fran’s concepts #rockstar!bucky barnes #bf brother!bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes smut

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moneymasnn · 2 years

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The holiday fling| Mason Mount Part 1/2

Notes: To start this off THERE WILL BE A PART TWO!! lol it will be posted on Saturday, so only two days! This has been sat in the drafts for so long until I though it was good enough to post lmao. I hope you all enjoy the fic, I haven't written in literal months, but I'm really happy to be back on mason Tumblr again!!! Ive missed u all, thank you for all the kind messages I love every single one of you! And also I wanna say another thank you for 1k!!! When I saw it I was so shocked I honestly cried lol... but anyways enjoy the fic my lovelies🤍 gif credits too @goalkepa

Blurb: One where y/n meets a stranger outside of a bar and they both decide to be someone else for the night, until this backfires on them.

Warnings: Just mild swearing!

The request

Fancy holidays weren't your thing. You didn't really fit in with what people call the ‘riches’. The constant cameras, lack of privacy. It was honestly the last thing you ever wanted to experience. But with your brother in constant limelight, you almost were forced into that way of life.

You had just finished your degree in journalism in London, and right now was a better time than ever to have a well deserved break.

Your brother had willingly been on the other end of all of the phone calls you had made. Crying in your university's toilets, telling him you were homesick and couldn't deal with the stress.

You loved your brother, and you knew he only ever wanted the best for you. But what you needed was words of encouragement, not “drop out and come say with me.”

Now, to anyone, yes I get it. That does sound like the life, am I right?

Traveling around with your brother, he's a F1 racer, so the traveling would be set to a maximum, amazing views, beautiful cities, everything paid for. Yeah it was very appealing, but you weren't going to settle for that. You wanted to do it on your own.

So let's say hypothetically you did go travel the world with your brother, you wouldn't have anything for yourself other than following his career and you don't think you could deal with another phone call from your parents asking you what you were going to do with your life.

But now that you have finished university, you have some jobs on hold. But for the time being you decided to join your brother on his lads holiday to mykonos, fun.

That's also how you ended up in the situation you were currently enduring. You and Lando had left the villa a while ago to go have some well needed drinks, and to celebrate the fact you actually managed to graduate.

But long story short, like everyone else in your life, Lando had brought up the dreaded question, “what are you doing with your life now you have finished uni?”

A question you couldn't exactly answer...yet.

“All i'm saying is-”

“I get what you're saying, lando, but I want to do something for myself.” You couldn't help but let out a sigh of desperation, fiddling with the black straw in your drink.

“I could get you a job with mclaren? You could be an interviewer or something, and on the plus side you'll be with me for a year, traveling the world.” He smirks at you, bumping your shoulder.

He would love that, for him to be the hero. He's had everything handed to him on a silver plate, and you hated that. For once in your life you just wanted to be your own person.

“Oh because mum and dad would love that.” You mumble rolling your eyes.

“I'm sure they would, finally being able to see their child with a stable job, and maybe a stable life.” He snaps back at you.

You let out a breathy laugh. You might not be stable, but who is after they've just finished uni?

“You're being unreasonable? I don't want to live in your shadow, lando.”

“And you're being ungrateful.”

His words hit hard. You hated passing up his incredible opportunity, but you just wished he understood why you were doing it.

“I'm not being ungrateful, but you making one or two phone calls to get me this job defeats the point of what I'm trying to tell you. I want to get a good job because I'm talented and smart, not because Lando Norris is my brother.”

You watch as Lando rolls his eyes at you before he waved over the bartender to probably order another drink in hopes it kills the tension.

A silence loomed as you sat back in your chair, playing with the rings on your fingers.

The thing is, he doesn't get it. You love that he wants to help, but he needs to let you figure things out on your own.

You watch as some of landos friends start to approach him from the entrance,all dressed in fancy over-priced shirts, crisp white shoes and embarrassingly sunglasses on in the club.

You eye up the men that only acknowledge your brother, ignoring your presence completely, and you suddenly think that going for a walk and getting drunk by the beach sounds like a good idea.

Lando wasn't paying any attention to you as his back was now turned, greeting the young boys that had just walked over.

You grab your drink, smiling at the bartender before swiftly getting out your chair and walking out of the bar, leaving Lando with his friends. He was too distracted to notice you had gone anyway.

You really should keep your head up when you're walking, fiddling with the black straw in your drink, it becomes a slight distraction as you go to make it to the exit door. Although, for you it wasn't only the cold mykonos air that hit your body.

Your body collided with another that was also trying to make it out of the door, you smiled up at the young boy, he looked about in his twenties, gorgeous brown eyes, eyes that complemented his dark brown hair and his short, stubbley, beard.

“Sorry, you go.” he said.

“No, it's fine you go.” You ushered him with a quick smile.

“No honestly, you can go first.”

Your eyes narrow at the man, he swiftly smirks, scratching the back of his neck as you take up his offer and walk through the door first, smiling as you soak up the warm fresh air from outside.

“Sorry, about that.” he catches up to you, deciding to stand next to you.

It took you a moment to catch what he was on about but then you realized that your drink had split when he bumped into you, luckily missing your outfit, but your toes looked kinda sticky.

“Wait here?”

“What?” You look up at the odd stranger in disbelief, before he takes the now empty drink from your hand, pointing to the concrete slab that was made to look like a bench by the door.

“Just sit and wait, please.” Honestly, your day had been awful, and I don't think Satan could say no to his eyes.

He goes to push the door to the club before he turns around again, “Vodka lemonade?” You silently nodded before he wisped around the door.

You stood for a second before deciding to actually sit and wait.

The back of your legs hit the cold concrete slab as you sat, crossing your legs staring at the palm tree that calmly swayed above you.

You didn't have a moment to contemplate what the hell just happened with the stranger when your phone dings in your pocket.

Lando

Where did you go? Sent 22:15

Y/n???????? Sent 22:16

Did you go back to the villa? Sent 22:17

I'm sorry if i've upset you i was just trying to help Sent 22:17

Y/n

I'm fine, don't worry. Gone back to the villa i wasn't feeling too good talk 2 u tomo. Sent 22:20

Lando

Get back safe x sent 22:20

You couldn't help but roll your eyes, but you knew you needed to get out of here in case Lando notices you haven't actually gone back to the villa, but your trail of thought crashed when an almost familiar body was lingering over you.

It was the guy from earlier.

But this time he was holding a black round tray with a set of drinks on it, a wide grin plastered on his face as he placed the tray down next to you with what looked like two vodka lemonades, and two shots of tequila.

“Drink?” He asks you with a smile. “The least I can do after I practically spilled yours.”

“How do I know you won't spike me?” You squint at him, he didn't seem like the type to be honest, but what do you know, he's a stranger.

He furrows his brows before placing a hand on his heart, before smirking and picking up one of the drinks, he sips from the straw, before taking a dramatic gulp. He lets out a breathy laugh before passing the glass to you.

You tried not to giggle at the stranger's antics, but the couple drinks you had with Lando earlier were already doing you dirty as you quietly slipped the drink the stranger had bought you.

“Also the ice is floating.” He added, taking a sip of his own vodka lemonade.

“What?”

You turned to face him, his cheeks tint a pink shade before he pointed to your glass, “When a drinks been spiked the ice usually sinks.”

You stare at your floating ice for a moment, if he is a serial killer he's pretty damn good at luring in his victims, because it's been roughly six minutes and this boy has you captivated.

“So what's your name?” he smiles, passing you a shot.

The smell of strong tequila invades your nose as you watch him lift up his shot to cling it with yours.

He can sense your closed off demeanor as he sighs, but his smile never fades, “Fine, okay then, maya.” He winks at you with his shot in the air as you copy his actions in swallowing the tequila, the sensation burning your throat.

You winced slightly at the taste, before slamming the shot back down on the tray.

“Maya?” You question him, wiping the dribble from your bottom lip.

“Maya… Everdeen? Yep, you definitely look like Maya Everdeen.” He nodded to himself as he placed his shot glass back on the tray.

“Been watching the hunger games have you?” You smirked at him, picking your drink back up to fiddle with the straw.

He smiled before his cheeks turned pink again, he was kinda cute when he blushed.

“Hmh, if we're being serious, you definitely look like a charles.” You added, gazing over his long brown hair and his gorgeously glossy brown eyes. Your gaze linkers around his neck for a little while, noticing the small chain loosely hanging down the tip of his chest.

“I don't think I grew up posh enough for my mum to call me charles.” He smiled down at you.

“Where did you grow up?” Your eyes were watching your floating ice, as he giggled at your question.

“Trying to get to know your victims?”

“Simply making conversation.” The corners of your mouth slightly moved upwards.

“Portsmouth.” He replied, he did have a south east england kinda accent. “You?”

“Bristol.”

“You don't have a bristolian accent though?” He questioned.

“I did a lot of traveling growing up, I live in London now so it's not like I'm around the accent a lot, it really pops out when i'm with my parents though.” You smile up at him, but when your eyes meet he was already looking at you, the silent moment of eye contact was cut off when your phone screen lit up.

Lando

Did you get back to the villa alright? Sent 22:41

Shit.

“Hey Charles, fancy getting out of here?” You quickly stand up, brushing off the dirt from the back of your thighs.

“Go where? Somewhere quiet so you can murder me, i dont think so.” He smiles, you roll your eyes at his attitude before looking at the glistening reflection from the moon on the sea.

“Exactly that, the beach will do perfectly.” You smile already making way to cross the road.

This was very out of character for you. You don't do one night stands, not that this was a one night stand, or even anything close, but you knew it wasn't the safest of situations to have put yourself in. And the fact your brother would be pissed if he could see what you were doing right now.

You pulled your heels off on the side of the road, watching ‘charles’ pull off his socks and shoes as you both took a stroll along the beach.

You spent the long walk talking about everything and nothing, it was nice, talking to a stranger. You and the boy never once spoke about your own life or its problems. You just spoke about the world and had an odd conversation about planes. He told you about his fear of heights while you compared it to your fear of spiders. You spoke about the future and how one day he hopes to have a family, you couldn't say the same, sure you would love to have a family, but you wouldn't do that with just anyone. After the conversations died down, ‘charles’ had suggested a game he liked to call ‘rapid questions’.

“Summer or winter?” he asked you.

“Autumn.” You quickly say.

“Good answer.” He smirked as he looked down at you.

“Okay I have one, are you a cat or dog person?” You asked him.

“What do you think?”

“You look like a dog person.” You bump his shoulder, smiling up at him, watching how his eyes lightley shone from the reflection of the sea..

“Correct. One place in the world you would love to visit?” He asks you.

“New york. You?”

“Vegas.” He sheepishly smiles.

“Best present you've ever received?” You asked him, he smiled as he thought about his answer.

“Hmh, my great nan she knits jumpers for all the grandkids every year at christmas.”

“That's your best gift you've ever gotten?” You question him, trying to suppress your smile from his answer.

“It's the same routine every year, but the best part is the smile on her face when she sees you wear it on christmas day.”

“That's cute.” You bump his shoulder as you continue to walk along the sandy beach.

“What about you?”

“The best gift I've ever received… probably flowers.”

“Flowers?”

“Yeah, I love getting fresh flowers.” You shrug.

There was something about you that the boy couldn't help but be captivated by, he wanted to walk along this beach all night and ask you questions.

“Something you hate?” You said, interrupting his thoughts.

“Losing.”

“Competitive are we?” You smirked at him, your eyebrow furred as you watched him scoff slightly.

“Very.” He winked.

“Not a sore loser are you?”

He laughs, “I try not to be.”

“What about you? what's something you hate.”

“Expectations.” You shrugged, facing forward as you threw your head back slightly, feeling the sea breeze on your neck.

He looked at you confused, you took note of the expression so you decided to elaborate on your answer.

“There's nothing worse when you try your hardest and someone still expects more of you.”

“Yeah, that sucks.” he smiled down at you, but his smile widened as he thought of another question.

“Favorite swear word?”

“Bolacks.” You said with a confidant smile.

“Really?” He laughs,

“It can mean so many different things, good food, it was the bollocks, just kicked you in the nuts, sorry about your bollocks?” The stranger couldn't help but laugh at your answer.

“Mines definitely bastard.” He said.

“Bastard?” You repeated back to him.

“No, you've got to say it with sass, like bastard.”

You both walked along the sand for a while longer, giggling as you both kept repeating the word bastard.

Your empty glass was still clutched in your hand as you both continued to slowly walk, you had no idea how far you had both walked, but judging by the complaining from Charles it was probably quite far.

You turned around at the noise of Charles groaning, he fumbled down on one of the sunbeds laying across it as he looked up at you.

“I don't really drink a lot, so I'm basically a light weight. I just need to sit down for a moment.”

You can't help but giggle at him as he sprawls out along the sandy sunbed.

You situate yourself at the bottom of the sun bed, your eyes focused on the view of the sea and moon rather than the clearly drunk man whose head was now placed on your leg.

“Maya?”

“Yes charlie.”

“I thought my name was charles?” He smirked, his eyes never leaving yours.

“It is, but charlies a cute nickname.” You had to take a second to look away, even with the alcohol his stare was intense to you.

He turned his head so he could look into your eyes better. But you broke eye contact again by pulling out your phone, you checked the time and it was currently one am. You knew you should probably get back to the villa soon, really risking it with Lando going home and not finding you all tucked up in your room.

“Tell me about maya.”

You smiled down at the boy, fiddling with your fingers for a moment, as you leant forward, gently leaning on his thigh.

“Well for starters, she loves books. Oh, she's a dog person. Her favorite color changes every week.” You pause for a second to think about what else you could say, but your mystery man was just soaking it all up.

“And she can't tell you what her job is or she will get assassinated, and so will you.”

The stranger fake gasps at your words.

“Tell me more.” He sits up, cross legged as he faces you.

“Hmh, she works for the FBI.” Your heart melted at the boyish smile plastered on ‘Charles' face.

“I've already said too much.” You say dramatically, hiding your face on his leg before you look up again.

“What about you, what does Charlie do?”

“Okay, but you've got to promise not to tell.” You silently nodded before taking his pinky finger in yours, he leans forward to whisper in your ear.

“I'm spiderman.” He smirks.

You pull away and gasp slightly, trying to keep it serious before you burst out in giggles.

“Why are you laughing?” He frowns at you, but you can see the smile behind his eyes.

“Shoot a web.” You demande though your laughs.

“I cant.”

“But your spiderman?” You whine at him.

Charles huffs as he sits up more, “It's the suit, it doesn't come out of me, duh.”

Your initial thoughts to this man was that he looked kinda sporty, like an athlete, a little bit cocky too, but the more time you spend with him the more you realize he's a literal nerd.

Your heart swelled as you wanted to spend more time with him, but you knew you had to get back to the villa soon.

“Thank you for trusting me with your secret Charles, but duty calls, i've just been made aware of a threat against the queen, i have to leave mykonos as soon as i can.”

You sit up but the boy gently grazes your legs.

“Wait, Maya.”

You stand up in the sand, looking down at the boy, especially his hand that was clutched around your knee.

“Meet me again tomorrow, please.” You thought about it for a moment, you leave in two days, and his company had made you smile more in the last few hours than you have in months.

“I can't make any promises, the jet leaves in an hour.”

“Well, the queen can wait, she's about to kick the bucket anyway. Tomorrow, should we say six?” You can't help but laugh at his comment.

“Where?” You ask him, watching how he lets out a sigh of relief at your answer.

“The caster hotel.”

“I'll see what i can do, spiderman.”

“But you were fine this morning?” Lando questions as he follows you through the hallway.

“That's because I didn't feel sick this morning, and now I do.” You huff.

“Why don't you want to come?” He leans in the doorway to the room you were staying at, he knew you weren't ill, but he would never suspect you sneaking out to meet a man whose name you still don't know.

“I just don't.” You sat on the bed, your arms folded as your dressing gown was tightly wrapped around you, hiding the dress you had on underneath.

“Are you depressed?” He cocked his head to the side, a questionable look on his face.

“Lando, for fuck sake, i have a headach, and your making it worse!”

“You left the bar early yesterday y/n, and you don't want to come again today? After everything you've put me through, sorry that I'm worried about you.” His words hurt, but not as much as the time on your phone that read 5:46.

“You don't need to worry about me.” You mumbled.

“But I do, I'm your older brother?”

You sigh before raising your head to look at your brother.

“I'm fine, just please let me have the night to myself.”

“No.”

It was times like this where you felt like just crying, crying until the floor swallowed you up. It was currently 6:22, you were sitting in bed with lando. You were both watching old love island episodes with some snacks that were left in the fridge. Lando canceled on his mates for dinner, meaning you couldn't sneak out and see charles. You were going home tomorrow, and the chances of bumping into your mystery man were slim, but you let it go. Guess it wasn't meant to be.

Part two will be posted on 16/7/22

#mason mount x reader #chelsea #england nt #chelsea fc #footballer imagine #football #footballer x reader #mason mount #mason mount blurb #mason mount imagine #mason mount smut #mason mount fanfic #footballer fanfiction #mason mount fluff #cfc #footballers #ben chilwell #lando norris sister

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bibbawrites · 3 years

Text

Family Ties - Charlie Gillespie x Reader (16+)

Request: Can you please do one where either Charlie is meeting your family or you’re meeting his and he keeps trying to be touchy/wanting to have sex but you/him don’t want to get caught xx

Word Count: 1721 words

Summary: your annual family trip gets a little bit more hands on when your boyfriend Charlie and his family join you

Warnings: heavy makeout, touching, a little bit of grinding, swearing, mentioned and implied sex

A/N: sorry if this editing is shit my brain is not working lol hopefully y’all like this one, ive been debating on rewriting it for what feels like years but fuck it i dont have that motivation lol also idk if theres beaches in canada like what we have here in aus but if there isnt oh well in this fictional version of canada they have aussie beaches anyways, enjoy!

Tag List: @happinessinthedarkesttimes @littlemissaddict @vicesvsvirtuesfanfic @headheartbellarke @lovesanimals @bartok-the-magnificent @juliefromaustralia @multi-universe21 @rangerelik @kaitieskidmore1 @katrina765 @fandomxreaders @ifilwtmfc

It had all started when you had jokingly suggested that you should invite your boyfriend Charlie and his family along on your annual family trip to the beach. Your mother had agreed, and before you knew it she was on the phone to Charlie’s mother working the whole plan out.

Your family lives in Quebec, and Charlie’s in Dieppe, so your mum’s quickly decided that your family would drive to his house, and then the two families would continue the rest of the way together.

So that’s how you ended up in your dad’s old truck, pulling into the driveway of the Gillespie house at 6am in the morning after almost 8 hours of driving.

You jumped out quickly, wanting to get away from your brother’s annoying rap music and your sister’s constant whining about being bored as quickly as you could. The front door of Charlie’s house swung open and within a few seconds you were being pulled into the arms of your boyfriend, inhaling his familiar scent.

“God I missed you.” He murmured into your shoulder and you grinned.

“I missed you more handsome.” You replied, exchanging a soft kiss.

Charlie’s family joined him outside and after a few quick introductions, you were on your way to the beach, this time tucked away in the passenger’s seat of Charlie’s car.

Once you arrived your families spent the day at the beach, and Charlie couldn’t keep his hands off of you. By the time you finally headed off to bed you were certain that every other person in the house was sick of his touchy behaviour.

You made yourself comfortable on the bed, watching Charlie as he entered the room, shutting the door behind him.

“I don’t think your dad likes me that much.” He said with a giggle, flopping down onto the bed. You rolled over to look at him.

“He’d like you a lot more if you stopped looking at me and touching me like you want to fuck me at every free moment you have.” You stated, and a light blush appeared on Charlie’s cheeks.

“You think he noticed that?” He asked, pressing his nose against yours.

“I can’t imagine he wouldn’t. You haven’t been subtle at all. We’ve only been here for the day and you’ve tried to jump me three times and that’s not even counting the shower sex.” He grinned cheekily at your words.

“I can’t help it, you’re just so hot.” He whined, and you rolled your eyes.

“But we’re on a holiday with both of our families. You gotta tone down the horny.” You said. He sighed dramatically.

“Fine, I’ll try to be better tomorrow. But for now, we’re all alone... and it’s our first night...” He trailed off, pouting, his eyes dark with lust. You nodded once and that was all the consent he needed, crashing his lips against yours and making quick work of climbing on top of you and sliding his tongue into your mouth.

You moaned, your fingers scraping down his back as he grinded his hips into yours.

“Fuck.” You mumbled against his lips, your hands finding a place in his hair. You tugged lightly on his hair causing him to moan into your mouth.

“Hey Y/N?” Your mum’s voice called.

“Shit.” You exclaimed, pushing Charlie off you. Not expecting the reaction, he jumped slightly, falling off the edge of the bed with a thud.

You giggled as your mum opened the door, frowning as she took in the sight.

“Charlie, why are you on the floor?” She questioned. You laughed harder.

“Fell.” He replied simply, rolling over to stand up, climbing back onto the bed.

“What’s up Mum?” You asked, hoping that you didn’t look like you had been making out with your boyfriend only moments ago.

“Did you remember to grab the bag of board games? We were going to play Monopoly.” She said, leaning against the door. You nodded.

“I put it in the little den room.” You told her and she smiled.

“Thanks Hon, you two are welcome to join us if you’d like.” She invited. Charlie shook his head.

“We’re good thanks Mrs Y/L/N. My mum is scary good at Monopoly so I’d rather not lose to her again.” He grinned and your mum returned the smile.

“Well the offer is there if you want it.” She said, before leaving the room. You let out a sigh of relief.

“That was a close one.” You mumbled. Charlie nodded, leaning in to kiss you again. You pulled back, giving him an incredulous look.

“Really? You’re still horny after being interrupted by my mum and monopoly?” You asked. Charlie pouted.

“A bit.” He admitted. You rolled your eyes at him, pushing him away. He whined but gave in, curling up next to you instead.

“Tomorrow night.” You said, flicking the tv on. Charlie snuggled his face into your upper back.

“You promise?” He mumbled against your skin. You nodded.

“I promise. But only if you’re good during the day.” You bargained. He thought for a moment before humming in agreement.

“Deal.”

“This is not being good.” You whispered to Charlie as his hand crawled up your thigh at lunch the next day.

It was tradition for your family to get lunch at your favourite restaurant on the second day, and you had barely been there twenty minutes when Charlie started to get fidgety.

“I’m not doing anything.” He lied, giving you an innocent smile.

“Bullshit.” You muttered in reply, and Charlie shook his head, making a disapproving sound.

“Language.” He faked disappointment.

“Fuck you.” You rolled your eyes. He gave you a flirty smile.

“Oh I wish you would.” He teased, his voice deepening slightly.

“Charles.” You warned, and he sighed, sitting back up again, his hand returning to your knee.

“Remember our deal?” You said quietly, and he nodded.

“How could I forget, I’m so sexually frustrated I might explode.” He admitted. You stared at him in disbelief.

“We literally had sex yesterday evening.” You whispered, your voice hushed. Charlie nodded, eyes wide.

“Exactly! It’s almost been a whole 24 hours.” He sighed.

“A whole 24 hours since what?” Meghan questioned, and you choked on a mouthful of fish, grabbing your glass of Coke quickly to wash it down.

“None of your business.” Charlie retorted. “Stop eavesdropping.”

“Don’t have private conversations around other people then.” Meghan bit back, but dropped the conversation anyway. Charlie gave you a relieved look.

“That was close.” You muttered.

“You’re telling me. Almost enough to get rid of the semi in my pants.” He winked and you hit his arm.

“Charles. Stop it.” You reprimanded. He grinned cheekily.

“You love me.” He sung, placing a wet kiss on your cheek. You couldn’t help but roll your eyes.

“I’m reconsidering.”

“So what were you and Charlie discussing at lunch that was so private?” Meghan questioned, once you, her and your sister Isabella were alone sunbathing later that afternoon. You cringed slightly.

“You don’t want to know.” You replied.

“Oh god was it a sex thing?” Isabella gasped, and Meghan’s eyes widened in fear. You blushed.

“I told you that you didn’t want to know.” You said simply, and they both squealed in disgust.

“Do mum and dad know that you’re sleeping with Charlie?” Isabella asked after a pause. You rolled your eyes.

“I’m a fully grown adult Bel, I don’t need parental permission to have sex with my boyfriend.” You told her. Meghan fake gagged.

“Can we not talk about this? I do not want to think about my brother having sex.” She begged. You grinned slightly.

“You were the one who brought it up.” You said. Meghan sighed.

“If I’d known it was a sex thing I would have never.” She replied.

“With Charlie it’s always a sex thing.” You answered.

Meghan and Isabella groaned in unison as you giggled, flopping back into your chair.

You really needed to get some girl friends who weren’t your sister and your boyfriend’s sister.

“Was I good today?” Charlie questioned, jumping onto the bed next to you as you scrolled through Instagram that night.

You put you phone down, pretending to think.

“Well, you tried to tease me at lunch and then tried to discuss it, which then led to me having a very awkward conversation with our sisters about our sex life. So I’m gonna go with no.” You said. Charlie’s eyes widened.

“Y/N!” He gasped. “You can’t do that to me.”

“Why not? I told you to be good and you weren’t so that’s on you.” You replied, returning to scrolling on your phone. Charlie placed his head on your chest, pouting.

“But...” He trailed off. You raised an eyebrow.

“But what?” You questioned. He sighed loudly.

“But I’m so horny.” He complained. You rolled your eyes.

“That sounds like a you problem.” You replied.

“Baby.” Charlie whined, dragging out the ‘y’. “I’m gonna get blue balls, do you want that?”

“You’ve got hands. And I know you know how to use them.” You said. He sat up, giving you his infamous puppy eyes.

“Please?” He asked. You stared at him, not wiling to budge.

“Your sex drive is frankly disturbing Gillespie.” You told him.

“I know.” He agreed, batting his eyes at you. “Please?”

You groaned.

“Fine.” You said. His eyes widened.

“Really?” He questioned, a grin appearing on his face.

“Yes. Quickly, before I change my mind.” You nodded. Charlie moved forward but paused.

“Wait.” He said. You frowned.

“What now?” You questioned, your tone clearly showing your exasperation.

“You want to do this, right? I’m not making you do anything you don’t want to be doing?” He asked, suddenly serious, and your frown fell as your heart filled with love for the boy in front of you and the fact that he was still asking for consent despite how desperately horny he claimed to be. You lent in, kissing him gently.

“I promise you’re not forcing me to do anything I don’t want to do.” You said softly.

“You’re sure?” He checked. You nodded.

“Positive.” You reassured him. He grinned.

“I love you.” He whispered, leaning closer.

“I love you too.” You replied.

And with that Charlie pulled you towards him, ready to show you just how much he really loved you.

#charlie gillespie #charlie gillespie x reader #reader insert #charlie gillespie smut #charlie

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melancholyblues0 · 3 years

Text

𝓌𝒽𝑜 𝓃𝑒𝑒𝒹𝓈 𝓎𝑜𝓊

𝒸𝒽𝒶𝓅𝓉𝑒𝓇 𝓉𝒽𝓇𝑒𝑒 : 𝒽𝑜𝓂𝑒 𝒶𝓁𝑜𝓃𝑒

brian may x reader series

warnings : swearing, that’s it rlly tbhh

a/n : so i was planning on posting last week but i got completely caught up in my new job lol so im only just posting now !! so sorry about the wait. ive already started the next chapter, and i was planning on spice but we’re going for a plot twist instead 🤨 the smut is definitely coming i promisee, im tryna build up the courage bc smut isnt my strong suit but im practising (that sounded a bit odd but you get what i meann). so. voilá :)

‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾　　☽༓･*˚⁺‧͙

y/n groaned, rubbing her head as she sat up in bed. her pager lit up beside her, grabbing her attention. she scrambled over to read the notification she'd been sent - from brian. she immedietly smiled as she swiped the hair from her eyes, as she reached for her phone to ring him.

"y/n ! hi - i need to ask you a favour. anita is going away for the weekend with the women, and i'm supposed to be at the studio with the guys. it would be absolutely amazing if you would be able to babysit the girls tonight for me ? jimmy is completely unreliable and i can't leave them by themselves."

you'd completely forgotten about the 'women's trip". you'd managed to uninvite yourself, claiming you had homework due in. this would be the perfect opportunity to spend some more time with brian. granted, he would be out tonight, but you had all of saturday, and if you were lucky, at least until sunday evening with him. you quickly checked the time - it was almost eleven am, meaning the ladies had most definitely already left for the holiday home down south.

"hey, of course i'm free tonight. you're lucky i'd spun a lie to get out of that godforesaken trip." you laughed, hearing him chuckle also down the line. "i must be a very lucky man. the girls are already at school, and i'm at the studio just now. i've left a key in the flower basket near the door, just let yourself in at any time. i should have enough time to pick them up later, but i won't be able to stop for long. they really want this bloody album finished soon." he sighed. y/n chuckled, before letting him know she'd head over soon. "will you be back tonight ?" you asked, hoping he would. "yes, definitely late. you're more than welcome to crash at mine. i know you're only over the road, but i worry about the girls." he replied scratching his forehead as he leant against the doorway. you smiled; it was nice to see that he genuinely cared for his daughters' safety, unlike your father. "of course. just let me know when you're way and such." you replied, beginning to get out of bed. you both said your goodbyes, and hung up.

- - -

after slipping on a pair of shorts and a jumper far too large for you, you packed a small overnight bag and wrote a note for xavier, telling him where everything was. knowing your father, he wasn't exactly reliable, and whether he would actually come home was a mystery. you and xavier had bets on who he was cheating on your mother with - his secretary, or florence. you personally were betting on florence. you'd seen the looks they gave each other at gatherings, and how the so often ended up being absent at the same time. you didn't really care, but you also didn't blame him if he was. your mother was an absolute nightmare, and an absolute bitch to everyone (to put it lightly). you walked over to brian's place, and opened the door after finding the key amongst the dirt, and stepped inside. it was almost exactly the same as yours, but seemed bigger almost. it could've been the open planned ground floor, though. you set your bag next to the sofa, and sat down, and making yourself comfortable. you glanced over at the array of women's magazines sprawled on the coffee table - obviously anita's doing. there was something about her entitlement that annoyed you. the little side glances and once overs she'd give you when you went within a five mile radius of her husband. that day at the country club seemed like almost a trick, a game. after he'd defended you from mark. he wouldn't have done the same for her; not for the past five years anyway. they'd drifted long before you'd been in the picture, if you were even in the picture in the first place. to most, you were just the innocent but rebellious neighbour, simply doing a favour for brian. but to anita, you were a home wrecking, conniving little bitch who needed putting in her place. you were just a naive little girl to her, trying to take something that wasn't yours, not even to look at. you'd gotten bored quite quickly thinking about anita, and what she so clearly thought of you. you got up to look around the house; the kitchen, the girls' rooms, the toilets, and brian's room. you smiled as you saw a small section of the wall covered in polaroids. you looked closer, and realised it was every city he'd visited while on tour, all the way back to their first ever tour. you smiled - he looked so happy, and so young. he wouldn't have been much older than you in some of the pictures from the early 70's.

you left the room quickly, not wanting to seem weird if he turned up with the girls and found you looking around his bedroom. it was almost four, and realised that the girls would be back any minute. you heard the door open, and louise and emily walked in, brian not far behind them. "dad, i don't need a baysitter. i'm fifteen-"

"only just, lou. it's just one night. just think of it as extra company."he laughed, before catching your eye. "nice to see you, y/n," he smiled, before walking over to the kitchen. "and yourself. how's recording going ?" you asked, although by the look of brian's face, it wasn't going well. "don't ask. freddie and roger both have a stick up their arses today, and keep biting each other's heads off. we're no where nearer to finishing the album than we were two weeks ago," he groaned, setting the glass of water on the table before sitting next to you. "sounds rough. i'm here all night, so take as long as you want. you're more than welcome to go for a cheeky pint before you come home, if you want."you smiled, nudging his shoulder. he shook his head, laughing good heartedly. he explained the girls' usual routines, and also added that louise would be fine, she's just being a 'teenager' as he'd put it. you'd gotten on well with lou at the party last week - you were sure she'd be fine. "i'll try and get home when i can, but i'll give you a ring when i'm on my way." he smiled, kissing your temple. you blushed furiously, smiling to hide your panic. he headed out, leaving you with the girls. you thought of calling your mother - you never did, but she usually had some good gossip on these trips. you had a good half hour before the girls would be back downstairs, so you dialled her number and waited for her to answer.

#brian may #brian may x reader #brian may smut #brian may x y/n #queen band

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aestheticallyunaesthetic17 · 3 years

Text

100 questions and answers

Who is your hero? Probably future me, i want to be able to grow up and be the better person that i hope they are, and the only way of knowing that is by making it happen.

If you could live anywhere, where would it be? New Zealand, Canada or USA. I lived in TX for 3 months and loved it there and I have family in NZ and Canada.

What is your biggest fear? Wasps, 100%. Not being stung but the way they look scares me.

What is your favorite family vacation? When we went to Krakow in Poland.

What would you change about yourself if you could? My skin color. I hate it so much.

What really makes you angry? People hating others or stopping others from being themselves.

What motivates you to work hard? To make future me happier than I am now.

What is your favorite thing about your career? I want to be in cabin crew, so probably the traveling.

What is your biggest complaint about your job? Being away from family.

What is your proudest accomplishment? Getting through the shit 2020 brought me without killing myself.

What is your child's proudest accomplishment? No kids rn.

What is your favorite book to read? Noughts and Crosses by Malorie Blackman

What makes you laugh the most? My boyfriend.

What was the last movie you went to? What did you think? Freaks. I was a bad movie, a little like the scary movies franchise. My friend was scared at parts which was super funny to watch

What did you want to be when you were small? An actor. Typical Leo ;)

What does your child want to be when he/she grows up? They can be anything they want to be.

If you could choose to do anything for a day, what would it be? Visit Edinburgh alone.

What is your favorite game or sport to watch and play? To watch, American Football. To play, archery.

Would you rather ride a bike, ride a horse, or drive a car? Drive a car, it's peaceful and warm. I would blast music.

What would you sing at Karaoke night? no idea.

What two radio stations do you listen to in the car the most? Heart and Capital

Which would you rather do: wash dishes, mow the lawn, clean the bathroom, or vacuum the house? Dishes or vacuum.

If you could hire someone to help you, would it be with cleaning, cooking, or yard work? Yard work!!!

If you could only eat one meal for the rest of your life, what would it be? Tandoori Prawn curry.

Who is your favorite author? Jacqueline Wilson or JK Rowling (only her books, not her)

Have you ever had a nickname? What is it? Just Em. But id like to be called Millie.

Do you like or dislike surprises? Why or why not? Depends on the surprise tbh, I like to plan a lot.

In the evening, would you rather play a game, visit a relative, watch a movie, or read? Watch a movie.

Would you rather vacation in Hawaii or Alaska, and why? Hawaii. I was meant to go this year but covid and leaving the US fucked it up.

Would you rather win the lottery or work at the perfect job? And why? Work the perfect job, id get bored sitting around all day.

Who would you want to be stranded with on a deserted island? my boyfriend.

If money was no object, what would you do all day? Travel and see the world.

If you could go back in time, what year would you travel to? 2012. To see my Nana again.

How would your friends describe you? Stupid.

What are your hobbies? Traveling, photography, music and shopping.

What is the best gift you have been given? Forgiveness from myself.

What is the worst gift you have received? Sixe XXL jacket when im an XS

Aside from necessities, what one thing could you not go a day without? My macbook.

List two pet peeves. - Breaking trust - Bad table manners

Where do you see yourself in five years? Hopefully working my dream job, maybe moved to a different country and traveling the world.

How many pairs of shoes do you own? too many, roughly 16

If you were a super-hero, what powers would you have? Invisibility or teleportation.

What would you do if you won the lottery? build my own house

What form of public transportation do you prefer? (air, boat, train, bus, car, etc.) Train, its so relaxing. Then planes.

What's your favorite zoo animal? Lions or tigers.

If you could go back in time to change one thing, what would it be? My time in America.

If you could share a meal with any 4 individuals, living or dead, who would they be? - My nana - my bf - Princess Diana - Obama

How many pillows do you sleep with? 4, two on each side.

What's the longest you've gone without sleep (and why)? 26 hours, traveling to Texarkana from Edinburgh.

What's the tallest building you've been to the top in? Idk tbh

Would you rather trade intelligence for looks or looks for intelligence? looks for intelligence because then you can earn enough for plastic surgery.

How often do you buy clothes? 1/2 a month

Have you ever had a secret admirer? Idk I guess so.

What's your favorite holiday? Summer vacation Christmas for an actual holiday

What's the most daring thing you've ever done? Moved half way across the world and lived with strangers.

What was the last thing you recorded on TV? Nothing

What was the last book you read? 1984

What's your favorite type of foreign food? Indian

Are you a clean or messy person? Both, but relatively clean

Who would you want to play you in a movie of your life? Millie Bobbie Brown probably

How long does it take you to get ready in the morning? 1 hour

What kitchen appliance do you use every day? Kettle

What's your favorite fast food chain? Chick fil A (i know, i cant buy it now tho)

What's your favorite family recipe? Nana's bacon and egg pie

Do you love or hate rollercoasters? LOVE

What's your favorite family tradition? Opening gifts on Christmas Eve

What is your favorite childhood memory? I dunno really, Ive forgotten a lot of my childhood.

What's your favorite movie? Ferris Bueller's Day Off or Beautiful Boy

How old were you when you learned Santa wasn't real? How did you find out? Probably 7/8 but I dont remember.

Is your glass half full or half empty? Half empty.

What's the craziest thing you’ve done in the name of love? Said i'd come back one day.

What three items would you take with you on a deserted island? A boat and food. Yes i am that person.

What was your favorite subject in school? Scottish school, geography. US school, government.

What's the most unusual thing you've ever eaten? Haggis

Do you collect anything? Foreign coins

Is there anything you wished would come back into fashion? Skinny jeans, my ass looks gooood in them

Are you an introvert or an extrovert? introvert that likes being sociable

Which of the five senses would you say is your strongest? hearing

Have you ever had a surprise party? (that was an actual surprise) nope

Are you related or distantly related to anyone famous? my dad is well know in the whisky business. Has his own prime tv show

What do you do to keep fit? Walk a lot and swim.

Does your family have a “motto” – spoken or unspoken? nope

If you were ruler of your own country what would be the first law you would introduce? everyone is equal.

Who was your favorite teacher in school and why? Scottish School, my geo teacher. US school, my english teacher.

What three things do you think of the most each day? My bf, my mum and America

If you had a warning label, what would yours say? Sad, angry and anxious

What song would you say best sums you up? 17 again

What celebrity would you like to meet at Starbucks for a cup of coffee? Timothee Chalamet or Tom Holland

Who was your first crush? a boy called Finlay who i rode the bus with

What's the most interesting thing you can see out of your office or kitchen window? sheep or cows very often

On a scale of 1-10 how funny would you say you are? 5

Where do you see yourself in 10 years? kids, married, settled down and happy. moved countries 100%

What was your first job? never had one

If you could join any past or current music group which would you want to join? 5sos

How many languages do you speak? 1 - english

What is your favorite family holiday tradition? opening gifts on Christmas Eve

Who is the most intelligent person you know? my mum

If you had to describe yourself as an animal, which one would it be? a cat probably or a tiger

What is one thing you will never do again? trust people fully

Who knows you the best? my bf.

#100 things about me #questions #100 questions

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myarmsaretoolong · 3 years

Text

so apparently i had a brainwave for a scene from my ironhusbands/bio-dad/riri fic and felt the need to write it down so uh... here i guess

very much unfinished and just a first draft but idk i think it’s a decent go

When Tony was a young boy, he still believed in family. That fate could throw together a handful of people who loved each other to the point of idiocy, and who would always have each other’s backs.

He believed in family right up until he realised Howard cared more about some long dead Super-Soldier fantasy than his own wife and son. Howard would always talk about Steve, about what he achieved and how he gave his life to save the world. Usually in the same breath in which he berated Tony for accidentally short-circuiting the lab. Nothing Tony ever did was good enough for Howard. How could it be when Steve’s legacy hung over his head?

Then there was his mum. She tried, god knows she was a saint compared to Howard. She’d watch movies with Tony, tuck in him at night, cuddle him as he held back tears after Howard’s last screaming match. But so much of her energy was spent dealing with Howard that she had little to give to Tony. It wasn’t her fault, he didn’t blame her for it, but that didn’t make up for much.

No, it was Auntie Peggy and Jarvis who really raised Tony. He’d spend his holidays from boarding school at Jarvis and Ana’s when he could get away with it. Auntie Peggy would visit when between SHIELD missions as often as she could.

But they weren’t family, they were just people. A small part of him realised that he wouldn’t let them be his family, but that was something he’d unpack later. Save it for when he inevitably got himself a therapist. Or, more likely, when Pepper and Rhodey dragged him kicking and screaming to a therapist.

Pepper and Rhodey, they were some more people. And the Parker’s, too. Just a handful more people. His people, but just people.

Fact: the closest he’d ever felt to having a family was when he’d brought Rhodey to his house for Thanksgiving. Howard was away on business, and Rhodey’s parents were on a cruise - they were going to celebrate together when they got back. So the three of them cooked together, laughing and singing along to the radio, then ate as much as they could without throwing up.

Of course, Howard showed up early the next morning. It was meant to be a surprise, but he’s seen Rhodey sleeping on Tony’s floor and flipped out. Within an hour, the pair were on a plane heading back to MIT. That was the last time Tony let Rhodey near his parents.

Another fact: this moment is probably the second closest he’s felt to having a family.

Ben and Richard’s deep laughter mixed into one sound. Rhodey tried his best to hide a smirk behind his hand, and Mary didn’t try at all to hide her eye roll.

Tony leaned forward, elbows on his knees. He didn’t like being on the outside of the joke. “Am I a chef?”

“Absolutely not,” May grinned.

Ben and Richard howled louder, leaning on each other and wiping tears from their eyes.

Tony drummed his fingers on the post-it note stuck to his forehead. “Not an actor, not a sportsman, not a chef…Are you sure I’m even famous?”

“Definitely famous.”

“Can’t be if I haven’t heard of them,” Tony muttered. He plastered a scowl across his face and folded his arms.

Ben and Richard reached the point where their laughter turned into silent gasps for air, faces turning bright red. Maybe they’d had one too many to drink, but everyone else was just as tickled by the game. Happy even cracked an all too rare smile, though quickly wiped it away.

“I think I know this person far too well,” Mary grinned, one hand resting on her belly.

That’s what brought this group of people together, one night back in February that led to an unexpected pregnancy. At first, Tony has been terrified by the prospect of being a dad, but now… well he still was terrified, but also excited. A few weeks later, Mary met Richard, then Tony met Richard, then Tony met Richard’s brother and his wife May, then finally the Parker’s met all of Tony’s friends. And the rest, as they say, was history.

Pepper quirked an eyebrow, trying hard to keep a straight face. “I think we all know this person too well.”

Tony slumped back with a sigh. “I quit, it’s a stupid game anyway.”

“We all know you just hate losing, Tones,” Rhodey smirked. He gestured for everyone to quiet down, waiting patiently until Ben and Richard got themselves under control. “Guess some people and we’ll tell you if you’re hot or cold.”

“Okay,” Tony rubbed his hands together. “Um… Gandhi?”

In a split second everyone in the room, bar Tony, cackled with uncontrollable laughter. Rhodey clutched at his stomach and doubled over, Pepper hid her face in Mary’s shoulder, Happy and May giggled away in their own corner.

“Cold, cold,” Rhodey managed eventually. “Like Arctic cold.” His comment only sent another wave of laughter around the room.

“That’s it.” Tony ripped the post-it from his head and turned it over, reading the two words that adorned it. TONY STARK. “Oh for the love of- Really?”

Rhodey threw his head back. Come to think of it, that handwriting was definitely his.

“That’s right, Platypus, laugh it up. I can take it.” He screwed the paper into a little ball and threw it across the room, then sagged back into the sofa, defeated. Soon, though, the sound of his own voice joined in with the laughter. “I suppose it is a little funny, in a sadistic kind of way.”

The laughter stopped as abruptly as it started when Mary let out a little gasp of pain. All eyes in the room went to her.

“Just a kick,” she waved away their worry. “Nothing I can’t handle.”

Richard quickly sobered up. “I think we’ve got a footballer on our hands,” he said with a goofy grin. Tony would have said it was sappy if he didn’t have a matching one of his own.

Though his baby was biologically Tony’s, Richard was just as much it’s father. The three of them had sat down and discussed how their co-parenting arrangement would work. Ironing out the details as the months wore on. Neither wanted the other to be cut off of the baby’s life, and they all got along plenty well enough for the unconventional parenting setup to be a problem.

Tony was glad for Richard’s input. He didn’t know how to be a father, had hardly had one himself. He had a whole list of what not to do, but the rest was a mystery to him. Which is exactly where Richard stepped in, helped fill the blanks and make difficult decisions - like what colour was best to paint the nursery and which buggy is the safest.

um yeah, that’s what ive got. this is partly just proof im still working on this, and partly me trying to get over my recent writers block on the aladdin au

let me know what you think?

#my writing #ironhusbands #rhodey #tony stark #mcu #marvel #mcu fic #marvel fic #tony stark fic

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ieattaperecorders · 3 years

Text

Notes on Causality - Chapter 4: Gerry

A favor for an old friend.

Read on Ao3

As he fell away for the final time, he felt that all-consuming fear, and his only thought was to cry out for his mother. But with the last vestige of his stubborn will, he refused. She would not claim his last moment. He was silent.

And so Gerard Keay ended. But there would be no rest for him.

The recitation came to an end, the agony of being pulled through his own demise faded into dull awareness. He remembered himself, the negative space where a person had once been. Gerard had never liked ghost stories. He liked them less now that he was one of them.

The man holding the book was a stranger. He was old, though probably not as old as Trevor. His hair had been black once but was far more salt than pepper now, and his face was creased around the forehead and mouth. A pattern of scars on his face and neck made Gerard think instinctively of filth, and of burrowing things.

So. Either this was someone who’d taken the book from the Van Helsings, or more likely someone they’d threatened into using it so they didn’t have to look at him directly. Pricks.

“. . . Are they dead?” he asked tiredly.

“You mean the hunters?” the man shook his head. “No, I sincerely doubt I would have been able to manage that. But I took pains to cover my tracks.”

“You stole the book from them?"

“Well, it was stolen to begin with, wasn’t it?”

“Hmm,” Gerard tilted his head, smirking grimly. “Condolences to your family, then. Aren’t many in the world who can cover their tracks enough for those two.”

“I’m well aware,” the man sighed. “I’ve done what I can, nothing left but to wait and see now.”

They were in a small bedroom, inside what was probably a cabin. Gerard saw dark wood walls, oil lamps, and a tattered rug that bore some kitschy pattern he couldn’t be bothered to identify. Any view there might have been through the window was obscured by white-out snowfall. There was a fire in the fireplace, not that he could feel it.

“Who’re you, then?”

“My name’s Jon. I used to be the Archivist, until I took your father’s way out.”

He gestured towards his face, and Gerard finally noticed the scars crossing over his eyes -- false ones, probably. The implications sank in.

“Hard to tell how much time’s passing in here,” he said. An echo of an emotion, something that was almost sadness. “But unless you’re a hell of a lot older than you look, I don’t think you’re Gertrude’s predecessor.”

“No. No . . . I was her successor.”

“So she’s dead?”

“I’m afraid so,” Jon said. “She died holding a can of petrol, daring a man to shoot her.”

The thought warmed something in the absence of Gerard, and he smiled. “. . . Good.”

For a moment, he pictured Gertrude standing on a chair to disable the alarm in his hospital room so that he could light the cigarette she’d snuck in. A phantom ache came from where the IV had been in his arm. The hole was still there, still unhealed. It would never have the chance to be otherwise.

He took another look at Jon, tired resignation coming over him.

“So . . . ‘used-to-be-Archivist,’” he sighed. “You went to the trouble of getting the skin book from a pair of homicidal maniacs. I’m guessing you have questions.”

“Not really. I assume you want me to burn your page, I suppose I just wanted to talk to you first. Tell you what’s coming, and confirm that it’s what you want.”

“. . . It is,” he said adamantly. “Being like this hurts , there’s no real life in it. Whatever else there is, even if it’s nothing? I’ll take it.”

“I understand.” Jon paused. “I . . . if you want, I can let you go. Get it done right away.”

To his surprise, Gerard hesitated. He didn’t know what made him do so. Maybe it was fear, the thought of facing a second end, one that would hopefully be final. Maybe it was reluctance that he sensed in Jon, what was left of him reflecting the emotions of the living like the moon to sunlight. Or, hell, maybe now that he knew it would all be over soon he just wanted to linger a bit longer. He didn’t know, and he supposed it didn’t matter.

“Nah. I’ll stay a while. Got all eternity to not exist, right?” he shrugged. “Don’t suppose you’ve got a cigarette . . .”

“Sorry. Quit some time ago. And you couldn’t smoke it anyway, could you?”

“Guess not.” Something occurred to him, and he frowned. “Hey, how’d you read it?”

“What?”

“My page. You said you took my dad’s way out, right? He had to blind himself, and the book’s not exactly in Braille. How’d you read the page?”

“Oh! That’s uh . . . sort of a long story, actually.”

There was a pause, during which it became clear that he wasn’t going to follow that with anything.

“Well, summarize then,” Gerard said. “I’m not going anywhere.”

“All right . . . I’ve actually met you before. I lived through a, hmm ---” he sighed, looking annoyed. “Well, Melanie insists on referring to it as an alternate timeline, which I really don’t care for. But I have to admit it’s a useful way to conceptualize it, so . . . .”

“Right, right,” Gerard waved a hand. “The whole ‘it’s not really this but we’re calling it this’ thing, I got it.”

“I was trying to continue Gertrude’s work of stopping rituals, which is how I met you originally. I burned your page that time as well . . . which, incidentally, did not go well for me. They did notice it was missing.”

There was a snippy edge to Jon’s tone, and Gerard smirked, unable to shake the feeling that he was on the receiving end of a cross-timeline ‘I told you so.’

“Better luck this time. Maybe the Van Helsings have gone soft,” he said without conviction.

“Oh yes, clearly they’re winding down to retirement,” Jon’s voice dripped with sarcasm. “Regardless, things got pretty bad in those years. And, um . . . the world ended.”

“. . . Fucking hell.”

“More or less, yes.”

“Was it as bad as we thought it’d be?”

“Worse. Whatever you imagined, it was worse,” he said grimly. “Eventually, I found a way to pass my own memories onto my past self, and with that knowledge I’ve changed the course of events so that none of it ever happened.”

“Hence the world still being here.”

“For the time being. It took a long time to find the Hunters, even longer to put a plan together to get the book from them without leaving a trail. By the time we’d worked out what we’d be doing they’d moved on and we had to find them again, and so on,” he waved his hand. “But eventually . . . well, here we are.”

“Huh.” Gerard paused. He ran all that over in his head again. “Didn’t really answer my question, did you?”

“Oh, right,” Jon laughed softly. “Well. As it turns out, holding the book and reciting from memory is good enough. If that hadn’t worked, I’d have had to call my husband in here.”

“. . . Where is here, anyway?” Gerard looked around at the small room. “It feels strange. Couldn’t quite tell at first, but this place isn’t normal, is it?”

“It’s not, no. We found an artifact of the Vast, a snow globe that traps you inside if you look at it too long. Time passes at a different rate here . . . minutes become decades, hours multiple centuries. You don’t age or die, but you feel the passage of time, and you’re only released if the globe is broken. By then if there’s anything left of you you’ll return to a world you barely remember, a blip in your memories that are now eons long.”

“Right. And you’re here on purpose?”

“A friend of ours was holding it when we went in, she’ll have let it go the instant we disappeared. A few milliseconds for reaction time, then a second or two of freefall before it hits the concrete floor. Time enough to erase any trail that the Hunters might follow.”

Gerard frowned. “How does that work? Won’t it be just a second for them too?”

“Well, yes. But whether they find us has more to do with us than with them? You know how these things are.”

“Inside-out dream logic, yeah.”

“While we’re here we’re not running, and we’re in the grasp of another power that will greedily consume any fear we feel. If our theory's correct, when we return our tracks will be obliterated, and any breadcrumbs eaten by birds.”

“Yeah, I get it. What d’you think it is about the Hunt that makes everyone go for the fairy tale metaphors, anyway?”

“Couldn’t say. We should be here a few months, maybe close to a year if it doesn’t break immediately and Tim needs to use the baseball bat,” he smiled wryly. “We brought quite a few board games.”

“Sounds like a cozy holiday.”

“Yes! We’re trying to think of it that way,” he smiled, perking. “It’ll still be rough near the end, I’m sure. These things don’t come without consequences, you can’t throw yourself into something touched by the Vast without a taste of the horrors of eternity. But we’re good at keeping each other grounded. And I consider this worth it.”

“Unless something goes wrong and you’re trapped for all eternity.”

“True. It would definitely not be worth that. No offense.”

“None taken. Eternity’s a long time.”

Gerard tried to think of the last time someone had done something for him, with nothing to gain for themselves. Then he started to wonder if it had ever happened.

Something in him became still, then. Quiet, and cold.

“I . . . think I’m ready to go.”

". . . All right,” Jon hesitated, as if he might say something else, then nodded. “All right, then. Goodbye, Gerry. I dismiss you.”

Something flickered in him, and then he felt himself fade. The room slipped away, and he was once again nowhere and nothing.

He felt himself being torn from the book, felt leather split, waxed linen strain and snap as he was pulled from the binding that held him. There was a moment of breath, there was relief, and then there was only the fire.

It was nothing like being burned alive, and he would know. The pain was more insult than injury. What he felt instead was a frightening dissolution. Whatever was left of him – his thoughts, his memories, his feelings – he felt them disappear as he was being burned away.

The fear of his own end, the terror he had been bound in for so long threatened to return and drag him into oblivion screaming. But as the last vestiges of what had once been Gerard Keay were consumed, his mind drifted away from itself. He thought instead about Jon, about the last person he would ever speak to.

He didn’t think much, really. Just wondered if his plan would work, if he and his husband would escape the trap they’d put themselves into voluntarily. If they did this sort of thing all the time – burning Leitners and making enemies of Hunters – or if it was even remotely possible that they’d done it all for him.

Then Gerard Keay was gone. For good, this time.

---

Martin dropped the quartered logs in a pile next to the door, pausing to stomp the snow off him, take off his boots and brush the worst of it off his clothes. The endless snowstorm being what it was, he supposed there wouldn’t be much wandering around outside. Cabin fever was the whole point of this place.

The sounds of muffled conversation from behind the bedroom door had stopped just before he went out to the woodshed, and they hadn’t started up again. He decided to give the door a knock.

“Come in,” Jon’s voice came from beyond. “I’m . . . it’s done.”

Opening the door, Martin was greeted with the sight of Jon knelt in front of the fireplace, wrapped up in the soft flannel blanket from the bed. The book sat on the floor beside him, and he was shifting the logs with a long, metal poker. He turned in Martin’s direction and smiled. Lit by warm firelight, nestled in the blanket and one of Martin’s old jumpers, he made for a remarkably homey sight considering where they were.

“How’d it go?” Martin asked, coming to sit beside him.

“I think . . . Well. I hope that he got some peace, in the end.” Jon reached a blanket-swaddled arm across Martin’s back, pulling himself closer and drawing the warmth around him. “Thank you for doing this. It . . . means a lot.”

“You’re welcome,” Martin kissed the top of his head. “But it’s not just for you, you know. It’s a good thing we’re doing, setting them free. It’s the right thing to do.”

Jon nodded, nestling into him. "Did you take a look at the other pages?"

"Yeah. There's only a couple in English, so I figure we'Ll do them first, then I'll start breaking out the books and tapes we brought. If reciting it from memory worked, I might not even have to properly learn Sanskrit if I can pronounce it. Could be fun to try anyway, though."

"I'm still doubtful there'll be anyone who wouldn't rather have their page burned."

"Maybe, maybe not. Seems rude not to ask. And it's not as if we're on a tight schedule here."

"True enough," Jon smiled. "Time is something we'll have lots of. And . . . you're right to want to give them a choice. Even if they choose staying bound to a skin book for eternity."

"Mmm," Martin tried not to think too much about what the pages were made of, knowing he'd need to be handling them. "Anyway . . . looked around the place a bit while you were having your reunion. Whole cellar full of canned goods downstairs, easily a year's worth."

"I doubt they'll ever run out . . . fear of starvation would just distract from the dreadful creep of the endless aeons, after all."

"Mmm. Can always count on you to dispense these little nuggets of sunshine."

"Sorry. Too grim?"

"S'fine."

"We won't be here that long. A few months, a year at most. The others will get us out."

Martin looked into the fire. Any trace of the page thrown into it was long gone now. He hoped that whatever came next for Gerard Keay, it was kinder than what he'd been through.

"Well, if they don’t," he said, wrapping an arm around Jon. "I can't think of anyone I'd rather slowly go mad with than you."

"Nor can I."

#tma fanfic #tma #final update in this big honkin story!#because I always wonder about loose ends like these

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cursedbag · 4 years

Text

cry

Tamaki Amajiki x Todoroki! Reader (This is a fluff I promise!)

I opened my eyes to see a white ceiling. Where am I? "Y-you're a-awake!" A familiar voice said which instantly made me smile. "Good morning Tamaki~" I cooed as I looked over at him. "W-well it's 1 in the afternoon..." He trailed off a bit. I giggled at his awkwardness which in turn made him turn to me with a small grin plastered onto his face.

"where are we?" I asked as I held his hand between mine. "o-oh! Y-you were part of a car accident and while you were mostly unharmed your body did go into shock and kind of shutdown on itself, y-you've been in a coma for..." Tamaki stopped before he said how long I was in a coma. "Tell me," I whispered as I got closer to his face. I saw a blush rise as he scooted away from me. "four months..." my eyes widen in shock. "So I missed Christmas and Valentine's day?!" I asked in shock.

"I-it's really not a big deal, y-you were injured and in a comatose state!" Tamaki defended quickly and he started to cover his face. He's so cute when he's flustered. "I'm going to spoil you rotten today baby," I said, I added a little wink before moving my hand towards my IVs and pulling them out. "ow..." I muttered before getting up. Tamaki was freaking out over what I was doing. "Tamaki, sweetie," I whispered as I walked over to the wall that he deemed fit for his sulking, "If I drop the holidays will you feel better?" I asked quietly. He nodded quietly. "Alright, I won't plan anything TOO crazy."

I filled out the necessary paperwork and walked hand and hand with Tamaki. Unfortunately, I didn't have clothes so I was only wearing sweats and the hospital gown. The snow fell gently onto our cheeks as we approached his car. "What did you do on valentine's day?" I asked as he started to drive. "W-well with you of course..." He said sheepishly. My eyes widened as I felt my heart squelch at how adorable he was. "I changed my mind when we get home I'm going to smother you with love, gift, and affection. And before you protest I'm doing this because I love you." I said before he could protest he pulled up to my dad's house and said to me quietly, "I have to run some errands today but I promise that'll be back at like 3." And with that, he left.

I approached my childhood home, I unlocked the front door and stepped into a much warmer environment. "I'm home!" I called out as I hung up my coat. I walked into the living room to see Shoto and Natsuo sitting on the couch playing some sort of game. "Hey," I said as I leaned in between them. "Hello," Shoto said nonchalantly, this made my eyebrows furrow.

"You have no reaction to me being alive after being in a coma?" I questioned Shoto as I placed my head on top of him. "He was crying when he heard the news," Natsuo teased as he poked our younger brother's cheek. Shoto swatted his hand away. "Well, at least I know you have a heart under that cold, daddy issued exterior." I teased him slightly.

"Anyways, who wants to go shopping with me?" I questioned with hope in my tone. "Didn't you just come from outside?" Shoto asked as he looked up at me. "Yeah, but I missed Christmas and Valentine's day with Tamaki and I really want to make it up. He spent Valentine's day by my side rather than staying home." I said I felt a blush rise on my cheeks just thinking about how sweet he was to me. "Alright, just don't start crying again like the last time you were talking about your boyfriend," Shoto said as he got up quickly.

We exited the house armed with warm coats and my father's debit card. "So Shoto," I struck up a conversation, "I've been gone for 4 months, got any juicy gossip for me? Like anyone at U.A?" I asked excited to hear what my younger brother was going to say. "It's the same old thing for me and I'm not telling you who I like," he said quickly.

I cracked jokes now and again as we went around the store. I was glad to spend some time with him, even if most of it was me making jokes about our daddy issues which only made him exhale through his nose.

"Maybe I should propose to him," I said as we passed a jewelry shop, "Will that make up for it?" I asked Shoto hopefully. "Didn't Amajiki want something not extravagant? Maybe take it down a notch Y/n," Shoto reasoned as we entered the store. "So maybe a promise ring? ooh, do you see that one?" I said as I pointed to a sterling silver tentacle ring. It was almost too perfect not to give as a promise ring.

"Isn't that a bit cliche of you? Getting him an octopus based ring?" Shoto questioned as he peered at the ring himself. "N-no! We went to an aquarium on our first date, which at this point was like 3 years ago, and he kept trying to make jokes about how he has eaten every animal there at least once but he kept stuttering and ruining his joke. I think it was just so sweet of him." I said as I thought back to the past. "See that's cute and all but you already told me this 3 years ago," Shoto said as he rolled his eyes.

"You make fun of me now but just you wait, Sho, one day you'll fall in love and you'll tell me about how cute they are and how you want to spend the rest of eternity with them. Just like how I want to spend the rest of eternity with Tamaki because he's just so kind and thoughtful and sure he gets nervous but he takes me out on dates regardless which is just so sweet and I wish he would stop being so negative about his abilities because he's amazing and I love him," I felt tears well up in my eyes. "I thought we agreed that you wouldn't cry over him," Shoto whispered a bit embarrassed at his older sister crying tears of joy. "I never agreed to those terms."

We bought the ring and quickly went back home where I waited patiently for Tamaki. I held the box in my hands nervously as I watched my brothers play their game. I felt all my worries return when I heard someone ring the doorbell. "I'll get it!" I said as ran to the door quickly. I nearly fell as I slid down the corridor to the front door. "Tamaki!" I said with excitement and anxiety laced into my tone. "H-hi, Y/n..." He said awkwardly as he entered my father's residence.

"I need to tell you something..." I said as I held his hand and lead him to the living room. "Y-you're break up with me aren't you? a-and right in front of your brothers too? Everyone always said that you were too good for me. Alright, Todoroki-chan have a good life without me-"

"Oh, no baby I'm not breaking up with you," I said as I grabbed his face with my free hand, "And who said that I'm too good for you? I'll kick their ass over that bullshit." Tamaki's covered his face with his hands and mumbled a quiet "I want to go home." I giggled and sighed.

"So Tamaki, we've been dating for almost 3 years now and I've loved every about 912 days with you and I honestly can't imagine my life without you. You always try to do better which makes me want to do better. I'm not the one who deserves you in the long run because you're just so kind and thoughtful and even though you hate being the center of attention you date me despite the news always up my ass about being a Todoroki. I love you so I just wanted to ask you," I got on my knees, "Will you take this promise ring as a sign that I will love and cherish you for the rest of time or until you don't love me anymore?" I opened the box to reveal the ring inside. I looked up at Tamaki to see him crying and covering my face. "Y-you don't have to answer now! Or ever actually! It was stupid, let's just go back to the dorm." I said a bit shocked and overwhelmed by his sudden burst of tears. I waved goodbye to my brothers as I walked Tamaki out of the house and to his car.

I took his keys and drove the car to the dorms. The drive was silent except for the few quiet sobs that Tamaki let out. We walked to his dorm and we were about to enter his room when I heard Mirio's voice from down the hall. "Hey Roki it's great to see you functioning again-" he stopped when he saw the state of Tamaki. "What did you do to him?!" Mirio asked with slight anger in his tone he grabbed the collar of my jacket slightly.

"N-nothing I just got out of a coma and realized that I missed Valentine's day and I wanted to do something special but I think it was too special and I know he told me not to make a big deal out of Valentine's day but I just wanted to show him how much he meant to me but now I feel bad and wish I was still in that coma so that he wouldn't be crying!" I said as tears started to fall down my face as I held up the box that held the ring. Mirio let go of my jacket and looked at the box.

"He's crying because you proposed to him?" He asked as he raised an eyebrow. "Y-yeah but he hasn't given me a response yet so now I'm just going to wrap him up as if he was a caterpillar in a cocoon and maybe wait till tomorrow," I said as I opened the door to Tamaki's room and walked him over to his bed. I grabbed one of the larger blankets and wrapped him up into a tight cocoon I laid him down on his bed. I closed the door and grabbed one of Tamaki's shirts to change into. Tamaki was still sobbing when I laid next to him but it was a lot quieter than it was before.

"I'm sorry if I overwhelmed you if I knew that you freak out like this I would have done it later and I'm sorry that you felt like I was going to leave you for someone else but really Tamaki the only guy for me is you and I did mean every word that I said in my proposal and I was just so excited about finding someone that I love because my parents didn't love each other so I thought that if I didn't do what my dad forced my mom to do I would do just fine in a relationship and one of the things that my dad did was force his marriage for his own personal gain and not for love. So I'm not going to force you to accept my promise ring proposal and if you want to just be my boyfriend then I'll be happy with just that as I'm just happy to be with you-"

"Yes, " Tamaki whispered, "I am willing to spend the rest of eternity with you."

I hugged him tightly. At that moment I felt calm. It felt as if it was just me and Tamaki.

For the rest of eternity.

#mha x reader #mha headcanons #mha fluff #mha #tamaki amakiji #bnha tamaki #tamaki fluff #amajiki tamaki x reader #amajiki headcanons #bnha x reader #bnha imagines #bnha #my hero x reader #x reader #bnha fanfiction #tamaki amajiki #my hero fanfic #fanfiction #fan fic

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rfamess · 4 years

Text

This cured my boredom for a little bit. Was making a few new music playlists and thought.. hmm. I wonder what kind of music the RFA listens to? So, I made this. For no reason at all.

What Kind of Music the RFA + V/Saeran Listen To:

Saeyoung/707:

- (I always see people writing that he’d listen to all star or other cringe meme songs because that’s what seems to be his entire personality, but I like to think he has more substance than that and listens to songs that don’t have to do with memes.)

- He definitely listens to rap/hip-hop.

- Can you not imagine him driving down the road in his cars, windows down, music blasting?

- He listens to his music uber loud in his headphones while working.

- His favorite artist is probably Tyler the creator, i mean, how could you not love him.

- Listens to Mac Miller when he’s sad :(

PLAYLIST:

Who Dat Boy - Tyler the Creator

Stutter - Freddie Dredd

Evil Fantasy - Freddie Dredd

Sweatpants - Childish Gambino

Bounce - Logic

Dead Wrong - Notorious B.I.G.

Movement - Oliver Tree

Stick to Your Guns - Watsky

Both - Gucci Mane

No Sleep Till Brooklyn - Beastie Boys

Can I Kick It - A Tribe Called Quest

No Limit - G Easy

Circles - Mac Miller

Broke Bitch - TMG (lol)

Bonfire - Childish Gambino

I THINK - Tyler the Creator

Good News - Mac Miller

I - Kendrick Lamar

FACE - Brockhampton

King Kunta - Kendrick Lamar

Lovely Things Suite: Knots - Watsky

Zen:

- (Similar to Saeyoung, I don’t believe Zens entire personality revolves around musicals, he probably doesn’t listen to them that often imo.)

- I like to think he’s a... well rounded individual when it comes to music

- Listens to anything and everything.

- I could see him listening to the same music as Seven, but is also very into 70s-90s rock like the Red Hot Chili Peppers and the like.

- He runs listening to all of his music on shuffle and doesn’t have a specific playlist so there’s never a certain vibe to it— it really is all over the place.

- In addition to Seven’s playlist, here’s Zen’s

PLAYLIST:

Funny Face - Red Hot Chili Peppers

Santeria - Sublime

Badfish - Sublime

The Luck You Got - The High Strung

Dedicated to the One I Love - The Mamas and the Papas

Heart of Glass - Blondie

Come as You Are - Nirvana

Brown Eyed Girl - Van Morrison

Machu Picchu - The Strokes

Dirty Harry - Gorillaz

Love of Your Life - Red Hot Chili Peppers

The Adults Are Talking - The Strokes

Bailee - The Licks

Where is my Mind - Pixies

Hurt Like Mine - The Black Keys

Gap - The Kooks

Give it Away - Red Hot Chili Peppers

Take Me Out - Franz Ferdinand

Hoops - The Rubens

Conquest - The White Stripes

Ten Cent Pistol - The Black Keys

Yoosung:

- Yoosung likes more upbeat music, maybe more new age/alternative pop

- Listens to music every time he tries to study, but usually get distracted by it and starts to sing along instead of actually doing his work

- Is probably trying to branch out of his style, Seven and Zen try to convince him to listen to their favorite genres

- The three of them always argue about who has the best taste in music lol

- He’s constantly wondering if his music is “manly” enough (it’s okay yoosung it’s just music)

- If this dude gets drunk and hears any of this music he goes absolutely wild and dances all over the place

PLAYLIST:

Bambi - Hippocampus

Turn - the Wombats

Paris - Magic Man

Chronic Sunshine - Cosmo Pike

Death of a Bachelor - Panic! At the Disco

Silvertongue - Young the Giant

Brazil - Declan McKenna

Unbelievers - Vampire Weekend

Baseball - Hippocampus

Australia - The Shins

Prune, You Talk Funny - Gus Dapperton

Honeypie - JAWNY

Alien Boy - Oliver Tree

Satellite - Guster

So Young - Portugal. The Man

Blinding Lights - The Weeknd

Circles - Post Malone

Unbearably White - Vampire Weekend

Tiny Umbrella - Coast Modern

Way it Goes - Hippocampus

Electric Feel - MGMT

Jumin:

- this guy has 2 modes and that’s it: classical bitch or music that has words

- He appreciates the fine art of classical music and listens to it when he has work to get done or when he’s trying to relax.

- If he’s in a good mood he’ll put on a playlist that includes “music with actual lyrics!”

- It’s a dad playlist. Billy Joel, Billy Joel, Billy Joel, Elton John, The Beatles, Billy Joel.

- He likes Billy Joel. Jumin has a dad personality you can’t convince me otherwise lol

- He tried to branch out but can get very picky in his interests. “I don’t like this guitar riff— change it”

- Either way his 2 modes are apparent in his playlists

PLAYLIST:

Dreams - Fleetwood Mac

California Dreamin’ - The Mamas and the Papas

Don’t Ask Me Why - Billy Joel

Starman - David Bowie

Miss You - The Rolling Stones

Dancing in the Moonlight - King Harvest

Come and Get Your Love - Redbone

It’s Too Late - Carole King

Movin’ Out - Billy Joel

A Horse With No Name - America

I Want to Hold Your Hand - The Beatles

Honky Cat - Elton John

Vienna - Billy Joel

The Stranger - Billy Joel

Waltz in A Minor - Chopin

Hungarian Dance No. 5 in G Minor - Brahms

Waltz No. 7 in C Sharp Minor, Op. 64, No. 2 - Chopin

Souvenir de Paganini - Chopin

Solfeggietto in C Minor - Bach

Prelude in B Minor, Op. 32, No. 10 - Rachmaninoff

IV. Allegro Molto From Quartet - Yo-Yo Ma

La Fille Aux Cheveux de Lin - Debussy

Porz Goret - Yann Tiersen

Carnival of the Animals: VII. Aquarium - Camille Saint-Saëns

Carnival of the Animals: XIII. The Swan - Camille Saint-Saëns

Jaehee:

- We all know her obsession with Musicals (specifically zens)

- Other than this she listens to...well honestly I don’t know

- Her music doubles as something she can get hyped up with and something she can listen to to relax.

- She loves to dance, so a lot of her songs and just songs that she’ll never be able to refuse to move her feet to!

- She likes the old classics and then she likes Doja Cat. Lizzo? Queen.

- She’s a barb let’s be real please. you can never convince me that she’s not

PLAYLIST:

Adore You - Harry Styles

She - Harry Styles

Call Me - Blondie

Starships - Nicki Minaj

Hey Mickey - Toni Basil

Juice - Lizzo

Say So - Doja Cat

Voulez-Vous - ABBA

Waterloo - ABBA

Cuz I Love You - Lizzo

Killing Me Softly With His Song - Roberta Flack (LOL the memories associated with this song after Killing Stalking..... hahahaha BUT ITS STILL A GREAT SONG!)

Only - Nicki Minaj

Boss Bitch - Doja Cat

Go Your Own Way - Fleetwood Mac

Beez in the Trap - Nicki Minaj

Woman - Harry Styles

9 to 5 - Dolly Parton

Blame it on the Boogie - Michael Jackson

One Way or Another - Blondie

Tia Tamera - Doja Cat

Truth Hurts - Lizzo

- indie boy indie boy indie boy indie boy

- Cmon just look at him he’s an indie boy

- If you’ve ever met a film student that gatekeeps music, they have the same exact taste but V won’t say shit to make you feel stupid. It’s just music bruv

- If you’ve ever been to an indie concert you know the fuckin dance you know what I’m talking about. he does that.

- Rolls a joint, pops the music off and he paints, does photography, whatever. Either way he straight vibes every single time the tunes come on.

- Low key thinks he has the best music taste. that’s just how dem indie kids roll let’s be real here.

- For some reason knows everything about every type of music. will spew facts about artists and songs at random

PLAYLIST:

Shuggie - Foxygen

Necessary Evil - Unknown Mortal Orchestra

Homage - Mild High Club

Another One - Mac DeMarco

Plants - Crumb

What Once Was - Her’s

Heart and My Car - Summer Salt

Cottage Roads - The Walters

Moonlight on the River - Mac DeMarco

Work This Time - King Gizzard and the Lizard Wizard

Like Yesterday - Paul Cherry

Call it Fate, Call it Karma - The Strokes

Knowhere - Nick DeLaurentis

Escargot Blues - Guantánamo Bay Surf Club

A Side / B Side - Tipling Rock

Dark Red - Steve Lacy

That I Miss You - Vansire

Top Tier Love - Lonely Benson

Driving to Hawaii - Summer Salt

Taking Up Space - Mustard Service

She’s the Only One - King Guru

Saeran:

- emo boy emo boy emo boy

- We all know it

- As much as I’d love to say he listens to heavy death metal, there’s a part of my mind saying NO he’s not like that.

- Well he is, but he’s got more than a few single interest

- Probably listens to Nirvana, Cage the Elephant, anything similar

- Is always trying to listen to new music

- Kind of sick of Seven blasting his music all the time and listens to the opposite of hip hop whenever possible

- Honestly enjoys all types of music, but sticks to his favorites

PLAYLIST:

- All Apologies - Nirvana

- Angel of Small Death and the Codeine Scene - Hozier

- Soma - The Strokes

- Black Madonna - Cage the Elephant

- Hysteria - Muse

- Why’d You Only Call Me When You’re High - Arctic Monkeys

- I Got Mine - The Black Keys

- Supermassive Black Hole - Muse

- Under the Bridge - Red Hot Chili Peppers

- Back Against the Wall - Cage the Elephant

- Creep - Radiohead

- Heart Shaped Box - Nirvana

- Demon Days - Gorillaz

- Bulls on Parade - Rage Against The Machine

- Matador - The Buttertones

- Holiday - Green Day

- RIP - The Licks

- London Calling - The Clash

- Loser - Beck

- What I Got - Sublime

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fragmentedink-archived · 3 years

Text

Hell to Pay: Chapter Fifty-One

I, II, III, IV, V, VI, VII, VIII, IX, X, XI, XII, XIII, XIV, XV, XVI, IX, IX, XX, XXI, XXII, XXIII, XIV, XV, XVI, XVII, XVIII, XVIIII, XXX, XXXI, XXXII, XXXIII, XXXIV, XXXV, XXXVI, XXXVII, XXXVIII, XXXIX, XL, XLI, XLII, XLIII, XLIV, XLV, XLVI, XLVII, XLVIII, XLIX, XLX

cowritten by @lux-scriptum

A/N: Happy Holidays fuckers

A/N: also trigger warning for Nik's pos dad, and,,,,, nah i think that's it. Enjoy <3

Not a day after Lev was officially banished, Biela showed up. She was brisk, not even giving Lev the chance to acknowledge the two people she’d brought along. He was to be on house arrest, enforced by a spell that the witch she’d brought along would place on him. The fact that he was allowed up to fifty feet away from the house caught him by surprise; he’d fully expected to be confined to the inside. At least this way he could follow the kids in the pool or out into the yard, though Biela had made it clear he wasn’t to be outside alone.

She’d concluded this meeting by warning Lev that the house arrest would last until he proved he wasn’t a security risk. That meant Lev needed to learn how to defend himself, to Biela’s standards.

Lev understood. There was no third chance. If Lev got killed by a demon, it’d be detrimental to Cameron’s functioning. Not to mention Lev wasn’t sure how he’d handle being kidnapped by one. All of that aside he did want to know how to protect his children.

Biela had left with the witch when it was all done. The man she’d brought, who Lev learned was her brother Caius, stuck around long enough to exchange a few words with them, though Lev got the feeling it was more to get a good feel for who Lev was as a person than anything else.

Once all that was done and over with, Lev realized he still had a full day. Cameron had Eden, and Lev didn’t have the energy to fight him while Cameron reestablished his schedule. Instead, Lev ventured downstairs, something else on his mind.

He found Sazra in her room, like he’d expected. He knocked on the doorway when she didn’t look up right away, but having her silver eyes pinning him in place didn’t exactly put him at ease.

“Hi,” he said lamely, unsure of where to start.

“Can I help you?” she clipped out.

“I hope so,” Lev said, trying not to fidget. “I wanted to ask you about suppressants. I don’t know if demon suppressants will work for me, or if I need to get angelic suppressants, but-”

“And you’re asking me why?”

Lev blinked. “Because you’re a healer?” He said hesitantly. “I figured you out of everyone in the house would know about the way I’d react to demonic suppressants.”

Sazra lifted a brow. “Why would you think that when you think your healing is superior to mine?”

Oh. Lev fidgeted for a moment, before, “I’m not versed in medicine,” he started, and then hesitated. “If I’ve offended you...” He trailed off, looking for the right words. “It’s what I was taught,” he finally said, honestly. “And I never stopped to check my bias. I just parroted what I've been told for my entire life. I didn’t think about it at all.”

“I can see that. It’s rather arrogant of you.”

Lev didn’t think he’d ever been called arrogant before in his life. She wasn’t wrong though. “I’m sorry,” he finally said. “It was.”

“Hm.” She thrummed her long nails against the wooden table, but didn’t offer any more words other than that.

Lev stared at her for a long time, unsure of what to say. In the end, he said simply, “Can I try to make amends? I was out of line.”

Her nails clicked on the table. “I’ll help you. Not because you apologized, but because Cameron is my boss and I owe him my life. Anything else?”

“No,” Lev said. “Thank you.” He paused halfway out the door, and turned back. “I haven’t had a heat in about a month and a half. If that helps anything?”

“I am aware. You can go now.”

Lev took that dismissal and slipped back upstairs.

---

After some searching, Lev found Nik in the back with Eden. He had her in the pool, in a cute black swimsuit with pink polka dots and ruffles. Eden was screaming happily as she splashed Nik. Lev padded to the edge of the pool, sitting down and dropping his feet in the water.

“Hi,” Lev said, smiling slightly.

Nik paddled over, dragging a giggling Eden with him. “I had to put sunscreen on her,” Nik said solemnly. “She probably burns faster than Cameron does.”

“Probably,” Lev agreed. He reached out, patting Nik’s hair. “Nik... do you want to talk about it? Any of it?”

“What part of dragging a screaming infant out to the pool suggests I want to talk about anything?”

Lev shrugged. “I thought I’d offer. We probably should eventually.”

Nik dunked under, though he kept Eden above the water. “Sure.”

“Are you okay?” Lev asked.

“Why wouldn’t I be? I have you, I have Eden, I have Cameron. Everything is going back to normal.”

“You’re pregnant, I’m exiled, and I told you I lost my pregnancy in the worst way possible.” Lev hesitated. “A lot has happened. And... it’s easier to worry about you than it is to deal with everything right now.”

“Well as you can see, I am the picture of health.”

“Physically, sure,” Lev agreed. “I don’t think anyone in this house is mentally healthy.”

“Hm. Well.” Nik moved Eden to his hip, not even blinking when she smacked his face. “Is that your professional opinion, Doctor Lev? I had not realized you had gotten a psychology degree in Ghost Land.”

“Nik, please,” Lev said softly, but he really didn’t have it in him to fight. In the end, he just gave a small sigh. “Fine. We can talk about it later.”

Nik went back to playing with Eden, so Lev splashed a foot lightly and watched Eden grabbing at the water. Lev would have been content to watch, but Nik grabbed his ankle. “Nik, don-”

Nik yanked Lev in the pool, clothes and all. After sputtering at Nik while Eden shrieked, first in surprise and then in delight, Lev glared at Nik. “I’m dressed.”

“Oh?” Nik said innocently.

Lev swatted his shoulder gently. “You could have let me go find a swimsuit. Now I’m soaked.”

Nik simply hummed. “Yeah... Oh well. Better luck next time.”

Lev huffed, and reached for Eden. “Give her over. I want a turn.”

“Mm. My baby,” Nik said, kissing Eden’s cheek. “Isn’t that right, baby?” Eden shrieked, grabbing at Nik’s hair. “See? All the ladies want me.”

Lev huffed, wading closer. He grabbed Nik’s sleeve when Nik tried to pull back, but was distracted by Cameron appearing.

“Phone,” Cameron said, looking annoyed.

Lev patted his pocket, and then held up the waterlogged device. “Nik pulled me in,” he offered apologetically. He set it down on the side of the pool. “I forgot I had it in my pocket.”

“I’ll get you a new one,” was all Cameron said. “Don’t do that again.”

“Tell Nik to not to pull me in,” Lev mumbled, before looking up at Cameron.

“I’m not his mother. You do it,” was all Cameron had to say before left.

“Yeah,” Nik parroted. “He’s not my mother.”

Lev splashed him and Eden both. Eden screeched, slapping the water herself. A laugh bubbled up, real and genuine. Lev turned away long enough to take off his sopping sweater and drop it beside the ruined phone.

This was worth it, he decided, dropping a kiss on Eden’s cheek. It was worth all of it.

---

Nik spent the next few hours getting a restless Eden under control and unconscious while also wandering around the house. Cameron seemed to be off in his study, doing Cameron Things and Lev was doing Lev Things. He was about to go see if he could bully Cameron into making stuffed peppers, when there was a knock at the doors. He was this close to ignoring it, and letting one of Cameron’s lackeys get it themselves, but he was closest to the door.

When he pulled the doors open, he felt his stomach drop. He had no idea why his father of all people decided to stand right in front of him, with that irritatingly neutral look on his face, especially in Demonic Territory. But he was. “Papi.”

Az’ril looked Nik up and down slowly enough Nik folded his arms over his chest, trying to hide his stomach out of sheer self-consciousness. Though it was completely useless and they both knew it. “You are pregnant.”

Nik felt heat rise in his face. “It’s Cameron’s,” he said, instantly.

“Hm.” He looked past Nik for only a second before saying, “Are you going to let me in?”

Nik took a wordless step back and to the side. There was no point in arguing, not when he was pregnant and he wasn’t going to risk the safety of either himself or his baby just when he decided he was going to keep the little leech who decided to continuously steal his food.

His father wasn’t even two steps in the house before both Cameron and Lev decided to come into the hallway from two separate directions.

Well that was just fantastic.

“Az’ril,” Cameron said, mildly. “To what do I owe this unannounced visit?”

Az’ril’s golden brown eyes flicked Cameron’s way. “I was not aware that I needed an invitation or to announce myself to visit my youngest.”

Cameron lifted a brow and stopped right behind Nik, close enough Nik could almost feel Cameron’s body heat. “How would you be aware when you do not ask? Or visit in the last year or so, but I digress.”

Lev stopped next to Nik and tried to take his hand. Nik only shoved his hands in his hoodie pockets and said nothing. Az’ril’s eyes narrowed ever so slightly, but completely dismissed Cameron and turned his full attention back to Nik. “Let’s speak. Alone.”

“Nik,” Lev said, quietly.

He could feel Cameron’s gaze on him, letting him take the lead on however Nik wanted to move forward. Nik only lifted a shoulder. “Yeah, sure. I think we can find a room.”

He shouldered past Lev, without so much as a glance, aware his father was right on his heel without needing to be told to follow. He found the nearest office space and went in, immediately going to open the windows when he heard the door click behind him.

“So,” Nik said, leaning against the wall, with his arms folded over himself once more. “You wanted to talk…?”

Az’ril made himself at home by sitting in the desk chair. He glanced around the orderly office, taking note of the very sharp, immaculate furniture. “He seems to have inherited a great deal from his former station,” Az’ril noted.

“Yeah,” Nik said. “I imagine being raped every day for five hundred years, a fancy house was the least they could give him. But what do I know.”

The vaguest look of distaste crossed his father’s features. “Your crassness is bound to lose its charm,” he said, leaning back. “Especially now that you are pregnant. Even if it is with a demon’s spawn, and an illegitimate one at that. That cute attitude isn’t going to get you far much more.”

“I’m sure my cute looks will make up for it,” Nik said.

“We’ll see.”

The tightness in his chest didn’t let up a single bit, if anything it just reached further into his throat, making it that much harder to keep an unruffled appearance. The razor sharp look in his father’s eyes suggested Az’ril was more than aware. And he was unimpressed.

“How does the demon feel about your pregnancy,” Az’ril said. “Doesn’t quite seem the paternal type. As far as I’m aware, demons tend to eat their young.”

Nik chewed on his lip piercing. “He’s fine with it.”

“Is he?”

“That’s what I said,” Nik said, not able to keep the irritability out of his voice. “If you’re wanting a birth announcement, I’ll be sure to ship you one in the post. Is there anything else you wanted?”

“Actually there is,” Az’ril said.

Nik waited expectantly, trying to not squirm under that golden look.

“I do not think your demon is equipt to adequately care for a pregnant angel,” he said. “And I do not wish for a disgraced outcast to be caring for my child.”

Nik blinked. “I- what? Then where, exactly, do you expect me to go?”

“Your rooms are being set up as we speak,” his father replied. “A nursery as well, as you’re obviously keeping the child. Even if it’s part demon, your status is of mine, and I will not be having it or you here any longer. It’s about time you stopped playing house and returned to where you belong.”

“...I belong with Cameron and Lev,” Nik said.

Az’ril stood fast enough that Nik’s spine straightened on sheer instinct. “You need to stop with these convoluted fantasies of yours,” His father said, sharply. “You will come home, even if I have to drag you by your ear to do so. It’s for your own good, Nikolas.”

“But- what about them?”

“They are not my concern.” He crossed the desk. “This is my own fault,” he said. “I gave you too much freedom and left you unchecked and now your inability to take responsibility for any of your actions has led you unmarried, unmated and pregnant. So now, you will be coming home, and you will be letting me take care of you. End of discussion. Are we clear.”

Nik’s eyes trained to the ground. “Yes sir.”

“Better. Now go get your things, because we need to be leaving.”

Nik pushed off the wall and left the office as fast as he could go without sprinting out of the room. He shoved open the bedroom doors and went for the closet. He stopped dead in his tracks outside of it, anxiety clawing at his throat, but he forced himself forward to get his shit so he could get out of here.

“What’s going on?” Nik heard Lev ask from the doorway.

Nik stopped dead in his tracks before resuming once again. “Going home,” was all Nik said, going to toss a few of his jackets onto Cameron’s bed.

“This is home.”

Nik chewed on his bracelet and went back into the closest for more clothes. “Yeah, and so is Tullum. Papi is insistent on me coming home so he can take care of me while I’m pregnant.” He tried to keep the irritability out of his voice. It wasn’t Lev’s fault that Nik’s omega decided to kick into self preservation mode now.

Horrible timing, really.

“He won’t take no for an answer,” Nik said, dropping the rest of his clothes on the bed. “So I’m going home.” He fixed a smile in place. “That’s what’s best for the baby, am I right? Got to get the special angel healers and- and it’s a family thing. I’m sure you wouldn’t get it.”

Lev stared at him for a moment. “You can’t go with him. It’s not what’s best for the baby and it’s not what’s best for you.”

“And you devised that in what, the five minutes of interaction with him?” Nik asked, sharply. “Family clearly does not mean the same thing to you as it does to me and mine. There are traditions and- and I just.” Nik exhaled sharply through his nose and muttered under his breath in spanish and went back to packing. There was no point. “I don’t have a choice and it’s not like you can stop him.”

“Nik,” Lev said softly. “I know people scare me all the time, but... not like him. Not like that.” He crossed the room, trying to take Nik’s hand as he said, “I won’t let him take you.”

Nik shoved his hands in his pockets. “Do you want to die again?” Nik demanded, voice cracking. “You seem to forget that I am the only one in my family without magic. My family deals and trades in death and he has the power to absolutely obliterate anyone. Especially someone with no ties or protections offered by angels anymore. You literally just defied the laws of nature. Don’t get between us and ruin it for nothing.”

Lev’s face was the fiercest he’s ever seen from him. “You’re mine, and I’m not going to let him take you from us.”

Nik bit into his lip so hard he could taste the honey sweetness of his blood. He didn’t have an argument for that, especially when Lev’s head was annoyingly big when he was being annoyingly protective. It clearly meant he couldn’t listen to reason or fact. His father was just… he was death.

He put his head on Lev’s shoulder, not saying another word.

Nik was snapped out of his trance the moment he heard the sharp order in spanish to hurry up. His head lifted and sure enough his father was standing in the doorway with his arms folded over his chest. “We need to get going.”

Lev looked at Az’ril. “He’s not going with you.”

Cameron appeared like a wraith in the doorway behind his father, eerily silent and perfectly unruffled as he sidestepped Az’ril as if he were little more than a stool in his way. “Nikolas can take his time,” he said, coolly. “As much of it as he wants.” His pale eyes slid towards Nik, looking for his stance.

Cameron was going to follow Nik’s play, no matter what he wanted for himself. He’d let them all make their decisions and damn themselves, but it would always be their decision. He’d have no part in shaping it.

When Nik looked down at the ground, Cameron then said, “Of course, if I wanted, I could keep him here. He’s pregnant with my child and as it would be my property, so is Nik.” The sheer, so very faint distaste in those words in Cameron’s tone didn’t go unnoticed by Nik. “I’m sure you, someone of such high political standing, would understand that.”

Nik didn’t dare say a fucking word, even as Lev positioned himself between Nik and Az’ril.

His father locked eyes with Cameron. Cameron was several centuries younger than his father, even if Cameron felt eons older in the icy, composed stance he was taking. “My son is not your property,” Az’ril bit out.

“By demonic law,” Cameron said, mildly, “he is. The moment you decided to send your son into spy on me and mine forfeited your right to Nik, and made him mine.” Cameron looked over at Nik and Lev, gaging the both of them with calculated stillness. “Come here.”

Nik was frozen in place for a split second before Lev gently took his arm and nudged him over to Cameron’s side. If Lev hadn’t made him move, Nik would have been torn between standing still and being at Cameron’s side in a split second with the sheer Alpha in his tone.

Cameron fixed his eyes on Nik, and then Nik’s throat. “Of course,” he said. “I am speaking in demonic terms, and not angelic terms. So let me be very clear about this.” A chill rippled down Nik’s spine when Cameron's very sharp teeth sunk into Nik’s throat.

Lev ushered out of Cameron’s way, but Nik could sense his eyes were still trained on Az’ril as Nik instantly went limp at the claiming bite being branded into his flesh. Cameron caught him easily before he collapsed onto the ground from the amount of hormones being flooded into his body.

Nik whimpered when Cameron’s teeth came out of his skin. He caught the golden sheen of blood still on Cameron’s pale lips before pushing his face into Cameron’s chest. Cameron’s arm held him firmly in place as Nik reached for Lev’s hand.

Lev took it but didn’t take his eyes off Az’ril.

Cameron didn’t blink at the way Az’ril’s eyes narrowed. Angels held mating bonds to one of the highest standards in their lands and Cameron knew it. “You know where the door is, yes? If not I’m sure someone can show you out.”

Nik didn’t dare look up from Cameron’s chest, but he heard his father retreat from the room, and hopefully the house. “I’m sorry,” Nik mumbled against Cameron’s chest.

Cameron tugged on his hair. “Quiet,” he said, not harshly. The order did mellow the anxiety curling in his chest.

Lev lightly bit Nik’s shoulder. “You’re staying with us,” Lev mumbled against his skin. “You belong with us.”

---

Breakfast the next morning was quiet. Though, admittedly, most of their breakfast lately were quiet. Nik couldn’t drink coffee and so it took even longer for him to wake up. Cameron rarely had much to say in the morning, and Lev was always tired nowadays so quiet it was.

However, this morning, Lev had something on his mind. “Cameron?” he asked. “I had a question.”

“Hm?”

“Can we start working on a nursery? I imagine it’ll take some work, and...” He shrugged.

Before Cameron responded, he walked out of the kitchen. Lev stared after him, and looked to Nik. Nik was still staring at his decaf coffee, face blank and definitely not awake. Cameron reappeared, book in hand. Lev lifted the cover as Cameron went back to fixing breakfast.

Inside the book was... plans. Color swatches and crib options and even a sketched layout or two. Lev traced a picture of a crib made of dark brown wood and with little sea stars carved into the headboard. “You already started planning without me?” he asked, trying to not sound petulant.

Cameron flicked a look in his direction. “You were sleeping.”

A low blow, but a fair one. Sleeping had been preferable to being awake. “Point,” Lev finally muttered. “Well can I help with the rest?”

“If you want.”

“I do,” Lev said, flipping back through the book carefully. He would have called it a scrapbook if it hadn’t been so brutally efficient. Besides. If he had, Lev had the feeling Cameron would have been offended. “I’m guessing an ocean theme?” he said, peering at the options Cameron had deemed acceptable for baby mobiles.

Cameron placed a plate of bacon down in front of him. “It seemed to fit Nik’s tastes.”

“This isn’t my coffee,” Nik suddenly complained, rubbing his face.

Lev looked over. “Looks like coffee to me?” He wrinkled his nose. “Gross.”

Nik frowned. “This isn’t. My coffee.” This time he sounded more irritable.

“You’re not supposed to have caffeine, if that’s the problem,” Lev said, taking a bite of bacon.

“Says who?”

Lev offered him a piece of bacon. “Ash, probably. But also every pregnancy health book I’ve ever read. And I’ve read a lot.”

Nik slammed his mug down. “Well Ash isn’t here, and you’re not my boss.” He pulled out his phone, muttering in Spanish. Lev only got another piece of bacon before Nik startled him by shoving the phone in his face. “See? I can.” He was practically yelling, mostly from excitement from what Lev could tell.

Indeed, Ash had typed out a terse, “1.” Period included.

“Somehow that feels coerced,” Lev mumbled, before pointing out, “You have to convince Cameron too.”

Cameron sipped his tea calmly. “No,” he said. “Sit down.”

Nik plopped down, defeated. He stared at the counter sadly. “You’re all monsters.”

“Well, four more months and you can have caffeine again,” Lev encouraged.

“This leech is taking everything from me,” Nik mumbled.

Lev reached over, brushing his hair from his face. “Soon,” he promised, kissing Nik’s cheek.

Nik wrinkled his nose. “So what were you talking about before you decided to ruin my life?”

Lev closed the book carefully. “Nursery plans. Which- Cameron, do you think Nate would come paint the walls for us? I bet he’d do something pretty.”

Cameron put a plate of eggs and fruit down in front of Nik. “I already called him. He’ll be here tomorrow to start working on it.”

Lev huffed. “You’ve already thought of everything, haven’t you?”

“It’s easy. You’re both predictable.”

“What the fuck is this?” Nik demanded. “You give Lev bacon, and I get rabbit food? I’m a growing boy. I deserve bacon.”

Lev decided not to comment on the fact that he’d offered Nik a piece and Nik had decided to bemoan his coffee instead. “Eggs aren’t rabbit food,” he pointed out instead.

Nik took Lev’s plate. “Well fine then, you eat it. I’m eating your bacon.”

“Hey!” Lev reached for his plate. “Nik! Give it back.”

Nik just put his hand in Lev’s face, but Cameron switched the plates anyway. Nik whined, and all he got in response was a baring of Cameron’s teeth. Despite that Lev put a single piece of bacon on Nik’s plate.

Before any more bickering could start, a knock sounded. Lev peered over his shoulder in time to see a sentry leading a short woman into the room. She was hauling bags with her, though she set them down when she set eyes on Nik.

Nik had been in the middle of grumbling as he picked at his food, but when he saw her, he dropped his fork. “Mami?”

Lev watched them, mystified. He’d never met Nik’s mother, but when he looked to Cameron, Cameron just shook his head subtly like he knew what Lev was thinking. That left Lev even more confused, but he just looked back to see her cupping Nik’s face and fussing at him in rapid Spanish. In Nik’s defense, he looked pleased.

“Hello,” Lev offered when she seemed done. “I’m Lev?”

“I’m Mami Coco.” She looked to Cameron. “You can call me Socorro. I’ll be sleeping in a room next to Nikolas.”

Lev could see the annoyance flickering in Cameron’s face, but Nik looked happy, dark brown eyes shining as he got a hug from Mami Coco. Somehow Lev doubted Cameron would be irritated enough at the disruption in his plans and schedule enough to upset Nik over this. Instead, Cameron filled a plate for her too, and said, “Sit.”

There was a certain look to her that promised much headbutting in the future, but she sat beside Nik with a simple, “Okay.”

Tagging: @incandescent-creativity @solangelo3088 @lil-miss-red @halstudies @littleyellowdinosaur @caelisis @idreamonpaper

#writeblr #writers on tumblr #wip boost #my writing #original writing #ch: cameron #ch: nik #ch: mami #hell to pay #cameron and nik and lev

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oimoi-op · 3 years

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when were you diagnosed with t1d?

Ok, so storytime! Short answer is, as of today, barely over two months ago.

(Very long post warning y’all, contains hospital mention and extensive, possibly upsetting descriptions of health conditions, specifically DKA)

My family doesn’t really have a history of T1D or even T2D, though my second-cousin-once-removed has had T1D for over a decade now. So, there was never any reason for me to try and get tests done for it. The only sign I really had up until last semester was two copies of a variant of an HLA gene that I knew about from a 23andMe report (which, according to the report, put me at a higher risk for celiac’s and nothing else), but of course at that time I had no idea that that could mean anything serious; after all, that sort of thing only happens to other people, right?

My college started in-person classes in the latter half of August. By October, I started feeling tired, having a lack of appetite, and needing water very, very badly. I actually went to my school’s clinic, and my erratic heartbeat prompted the doctor to recommend me for a Covid-19 test. My school’s protocols meant that I had to quarantine at my home (since I live within two hours of campus) until I got a negative test result. At home, I was drinking water all the time and sleeping constantly, and my parents had commented on how I’d been losing weight. I thought these were all good things. I had been slightly overweight at my high school graduation, and I’d always heard that drinking a lot of water is good for you, so I thought I was actually in excellent health even if I kind of felt like shit most of the time.

Well. Uh. I was wrong.

When finals came around in mid-November, I was just fucking tired. I’d get a decent eight hours of sleep and still have to take naps during the day. Hell, I was even late for work because I slept through one of my nap alarms. Studying was a pain in the ass. Attending classes was a pain in the ass. Staying awake for Zoom classes was a pain in the ass. I was waking up at 5 am to go to the bathroom, and then I would drink the rest of my water, refill it, drink half of it again, and then go back to sleep. Finally, November 20th rolled around, and I got to leave campus. It was my birthday (yeah I am a Scorpio and that weirds all of my friends out lol), and my parents took me to Fusion. And I just...couldn’t eat at all? I love hibachi, but I couldn’t even eat half of my food. The chef even got me a delicious banana split that I had to basically bully my younger sister into eating with me.

For the next week, I was sleeping about 18 hours a day. I didn’t think this was weird because I’d just had finals so yeah, it makes sense that I would be tired after exams and whatnot. I went shopping with my mom, sister, and sister’s bff. We were only out for a few hours, but I was fucking wiped out y’all, like in pain. Thanksgiving arrived, and again, I love food, I love eating, but I was not hungry in the slightest. I basically had to force myself to eat some of my favorite holiday foods just so I wouldn’t offend my mom, and then I didn’t eat for the day.

The very next morning, I was puking my guts out.

This started a pattern for the next few days: I would eat chicken noodle soup or some other food, sleep like the dead, and throw up every morning and every night. I started chugging large bottles of Gatorade constantly (which, if you know about diabetes and its health complications, did not help my situation in the slightest). I started breathing erratically after very little exertion. Like, I’m talking standing up and stretching brought about heavy, labored breathing. I weighed myself on my parents’ scale, and I was under 130 lbs. Now, for some people this might seem like a lot, but due to my height and build I could fucking see some of my ribs. That was when I started to realize that something was very, very wrong, but “losing weight is good” and I didn’t want my parents to laugh at me for voicing concerns (though, for all their faults, in hindsight, I doubt they would’ve). Yeah. Don’t do that, folks, that’s not a good mindset to have.

On Sunday, my mom took me to town to get tested for Covid. This was despite me saying that I didn’t have symptoms (which I knew very well due to some of my friends catching it at school). Rapid test came back negative, so I did a culture test. Hell, while I was sitting in the damn chair, I was about to pass out. I asked for a nausea pill but my mouth was too dry for it to dissolve. I got a cup of water, downed it all, and felt like my throat was on fire. For the rest of the day I felt so, so awful. At some point I was walking toward my bed in my room and I fucking fell. I’m fucking lucky there was carpet.

Regarding the rest of that night, things start to get blurry, for the lack of a better term. I legitimately cannot recall everything that happened that night or the following two days, so I will just try to explain it in the way I remember it best.

Around...midnight or one??? I was on fucking fire, so I went to my bathroom and decided to lie on the floor. The floor was hardwood and not at all cold, and it wasn’t fucking comfortable even in that state, but I was just in so much pain I didn’t even care. My mom must’ve heard because she found me there and asked me what I was doing. I said something about the floor. She asked me to go back to bed, but I must’ve scared her because she asked me if I wanted her to lie in the bed with me. I don’t remember what I said to her, but we were in the bed and she was trying to hug me, but she was too warm and so I told her to stop. I kept feeling this burning just below my chest, like there was acid in me (which I guess wasn’t too far off), so I would randomly sit up to try and alleviate the pain and not cry. I remember asking my mom to take me to the hospital in the morning.

My mom put me in the truck (I think around 5 am is what she told me). I remembered hearing my dad. I was lying down. Then I was awake, but I was on the floor. I thought this was wrong so I tried to tell my mom that but I guess I couldn’t talk. Then I was in a hospital bed, the ER I assume. My mom gave me some water with a sponge, and I was just so fucking thirsty. Then I was in the ICU hooked up to a bunch of machines. I didn’t know what was going on, but my mom kept giving me water with that sponge. That is all I remember from Monday.

I remember a little bit more from Tuesday. My mom said something about diabetes, but that didn’t make any sense to me because I wasn’t “fat” and I’d been losing weight, even! What had I done to get diabetes? I was thirsty and tired, so I slept a lot. At some point I really needed to use the restroom so I unhooked my IV???? (I mean I must’ve disconnected myself somehow but I can’t remember the details) which set off a shit ton of alarms and people were Very Concerned and kept asking me Why Did You Do That? But I just needed to go to the restroom, and they told me to use the Red Button to Call the Nurse (it was already there, and I now realize that we’d probably had a similar conversation about the Red Button to Call the Nurse possibly multiple times before this) in the future. A Chopped Teen Tournament from 2017 was playing on the TV nonstop. There were commercials for CGMs. I thought that God wasn’t being very funny about the whole thing.

As of now I remember even less of Wednesday, but I know that felt better. There was this diabetes specialist who kept talking about insulin and life at college moving forward, but I wasn’t really there, either because of being so out of it for health reasons, disassociating, or a combination of the two. My mom told me she had emailed a professor so he would give me an extension on an assignment that was due by then, and I remember crying because I thought that was just so nice of him. That night, this guy got me in a wheelchair and put me in another room, which I would later learn was the ACU. My night nurse was this nice woman named Tanya, who had a very thick Eastern European accent. She got me orange juice to take some potassium pills, but it felt like swallowing rocks. I didn’t really get a lot of sleep, so I was awake when the nurses changed shifts. I remember one of them expressing surprise that I was out of the ICU so early.

My mom took longer to come that day because nobody had told her I’d been moved. I’d had plain Cheerios and orange juice for breakfast, but I couldn’t really eat because my throat hurt so badly. I talked to a lot of doctors. I guess at this point or somewhere near it I accepted that I had diabetes, but it wasn’t really real until the same diabetes specialist was going over carbs. I thought I was never going to eat shit I liked ever again. I really wanted a fucking McChicken sandwich. I signed some papers for Medicaid because I had aged out of the CHIP while in the hospital. I finally texted my friends and explained to them what had happened. I was so fucking tired.

I got out the next day, so that was Thursday. Normally, I would’ve been in the hospital much longer (especially because my Medicaid hadn’t been approved, meaning no insurance had approved of my insulin yet), but Covid cases were on the rise and the hospital wanted me out of there. The diabetes specialist and one of my nurses snuck me two fast-acting and two basal insulin pens, and I was out. I ate half a McChicken, a small fry, and drank my first Diet Coke. It tasted like diesel mixed with piss.

That’s the gist of it. The hospital staff was very nice and thoughtful the entire time, I think. I felt as though everyone involved cared about my health a lot.

For those of you who aren’t T1D or just don’t know, what I experienced is called DKA, short for diabetic ketoacidosis. To simplify, I was very close to entering a diabetic coma. My sister later told me that our dad had said (I assume a doctor had told my mother, who, in turn, had told him) that I was “approximately 45 minutes” away from death. DKA happens when a diabetic (usually a T1D like me) has too much blood sugar in their body due to them lacking the insulin necessary to break the sugar down, so their body breaks down their fat reserves and muscle to get the energy it needs. This is why I lost around 50 pounds over the course of a few months (I was 118 lbs. when I entered the hospital, the lowest I’ve been since grade school). I was officially diagnosed with T1D on November 30th, just ten days after my 19th birthday, which is a little older than normal I believe. It’s...well, it’s not fun, but I feel very grateful for my large support system, and tomorrow I’m trying out a CGM for the first time and applying for both it and a pump, so things are really looking up

#personal #iamapincushion #t1d #type one diabetes #type one diabetic #dka #diabetic ketoacidosis #tw hospital #tw dka #i don't think you meant me for to respond with such a long answer #but #well #it's something i've been wanting to post for a while now and this seemed like a good opportunity

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katblu42 · 3 years

Text

The End?

This is something I wrote for a creative writing competition. The challenge was to write something (within a week) starting at the end and working back to the beginning. For some reason the prompt/challenge sparked this little piece, which is pretty much non-fiction. I guess it came at a time when the subject matter was on my mind. I wanted to post it now because a related anniversary is coming up.

There are warnings!!! Please heed the tags. Death, Sickness, Hospitals, Cancer. (If more warnings/tags are needed please let me know so I can make appropriate edits!)

Below the cut for length and warnings.

This was not how their story was supposed to end. There were still so many chapters they had hoped to write together, so many journeys toward possible futures that they had imagined spending side by side. She never anticipated being a childless widow before she had even turned forty-two. She’d never considered being faced with a hopeless situation, or the unenviable decision to allow them to stop treatment and let him slip away. Treatments that could prolong his life a little, but not fix him. Their plans had never included his hand desperately clinging to hers as she tearfully told him it was okay for him to let go and leave her behind.

He had wanted to fight. It broke her heart that there was nothing the combined efforts of all the medical staff could do to support his fight. It was a losing battle. His body was giving up on him, organs shutting down even though his mind was not ready to give up. The three weeks he lasted in the ICU had left him battle-scarred and exhausted, but he had still not wanted to give in, or let her down.

His Forty-second birthday was less than a week before the end. It was spent with family, visiting two by two according to ICU visitor limits. He was barely able to communicate by then, his lips scabbed and bloody, and a ventilator tube in his throat inserted by tracheostomy. The medical team had not wanted the tube to remain in his mouth any longer, but he was too weak to breathe on his own.

He had been off the ventilator for a while, during one of the hopeful moments. They’d been able to remove the breathing tube, and they had been able to reduce the blood pressure medication for a while. His temperature had stabilised and she’d focused on the improvements, encouraging him to think positive. Facing the alternative had been unthinkable.

She had put such hope in the drug she’d had to sign permission for them to administer – one that had to be shipped urgently from interstate, that had approval for use in the US, but not here. They had told her it was possible too much time had passed for the reversal drug to be fully effective. It had been more than five days since the chemo treatment which now needed reversing had ended.

Hope was all she’d had at that point. Seeing him finally settled in Intensive Care with all the monitors and their beeps and alarms, the ventilator with its click and hiss, the hum of the heat pump regulating his temperature, the blood transfusion and IV lines all keeping her unconscious husband alive, she had to cling to every scrap of hope she could. His immune system was so compromised she had to wear the gown and gloves and mask just to sit in the corner of the room and let the silent tears fall.

The ICU waiting room was deserted during the wee hours. She and her Mum stayed until dawn before buzzing the door intercom to enquire about seeing him. His Dad had left after the surgeon had spoken to them all some hours before, explaining that in his current state surgery was not a viable option for the infection in his gut. The previous wait in Emergency had been shorter, and the waiting room slightly more comfortable, but the constant worry and the lack of information had been excruciating.

Two ambulances had attended their tiny unit in answer to her call, such was the seriousness of his condition. Despite having four uniformed people fussing over her husband, she had not been given much information about what was happening. She’d been instructed to get all his medication together to bring with her to the hospital, then left to change out of her pyjamas while they loaded him into an ambulance. All this happened in a blur of action and confusion. Less than 20 minutes before they all headed to the hospital she had been performing chest compressions on him on the tiled floor of their cramped bathroom.

The Emergency Services operator on the other end of the phone had talked her through the CPR procedure. She’d learned it years before in first aid training, but having to actually perform the chest compressions on someone she loved was still horrifyingly daunting. He hadn’t stopped breathing, but the ES operator had assured her CPR was necessary because his gasping breaths had been so far apart.

She had never had to call an ambulance for anyone before, but it didn’t take a genius to see she needed help. His level of responsiveness had decreased so rapidly after she’d found him slumped forward sitting on the toilet, unable to sit up unaided. The yellow tinge to his skin had startled her. He had cried out to her in such a way that instinct had brought her rushing from the loungeroom without taking a moment to process anything more than the feeling that something was very wrong.

He had just wanted to sleep, so she tried to give him space to do that, sitting quietly in the loungeroom while he stayed in the darkened bedroom. He had refused to let her bring him something to eat, which had concerned her. She’d offered to call the hospital for advice, knowing he was uncomfortable and wanting to make sure he was okay, but he had refused to let her, insisting that there was no need to make a fuss. She’d arrived home from work around five, and suspected he had been in bed all day, “just feeling a bit yuck.” Later she would feel so much guilt for not trusting her instinct to get help for him then.

For the first couple of days after his chemo treatment ended he had seemed okay, feeling upbeat, acting normal. He had been in high spirits despite the prospect of months of treatment still ahead. There had been a little grumbling about feeling a little bit off, but that was to be expected, right?

His first (and only) round of chemo had been a five day affair. Three medications, two of which had been administered within a day at the clinic and the third he had carried around in a little pack while it slowly released over the five days. The plan had been laid out by the oncology team, with lots of consultations and discussions during the preceding weeks. He was to have two or three rounds of the chemo drugs, then radiation treatment would begin. Combination therapy to treat the cancers in his mouth and throat.

There had been months of discomfort, reducing his ability to eat properly, or enjoy food. He had lost a considerable amount of weight before she had been able to convince him to finally go and see a doctor and find out what was wrong. He’d always been the type to avoid going to a doctor unless he was literally at death’s door. She knew that part of what had held him back for so long was the fear that it could be something serious.

He didn’t want to ruin their holiday, but he promised he would see someone about the sore throat when they got back from the Gold Coast. It was only a week spent away, but they had visited all their favourite haunts. This was one of their regular holiday spots during their ten year marriage. They always felt like big kids, visiting the theme parks and the beaches, playing mini golf, messing about in the resort pool.

The two of them had been lucky to share many little trips away over the years. They’d had many more days of laughter and smiles than they’d had of tears and troubles. There had been precious gifts exchanged between them – but not many in a physical form she could lay her hands on. Each of them had broadened the other’s horizons, sparking interest in new experiences, sharing the activities and pass-times they loved.

Their wedding day had been filled with fun and friends and family. She had seen then how many people his bright and generous personality drew to him. So many people had wanted to share in their joy, and had told her she would never find a more loyal and loving mate. All the elegance and finery, the colour and music, the celebration of their union had been a wonderful way to begin their journey hand in hand to the future.

His proposal on the beach, early in the morning in a place he had been holidaying with his family every year since he was tiny, had taken her by surprise. He had asked her to come with him for a walk. They had travelled quite a long way up the beach, just watching the waves crash on the shore, listening to the shrieks of the gulls and making small talk. Then he had dropped to one knee and asked the question. She needed a moment to take in what was happening. His heart just about stopped, thinking she was hesitating. She had said yes, and put him out of his nervous agony.

Their first “proper” date was a walk to the local McDonalds for burgers and sundaes. Neither of them had much money, so neither had wanted to go anywhere fancy. She had been happy with the little things – like the way he always walked beside her on the footpath placing himself between her and the busy road. He was not rich, nor did he have impressive style or a brainiac’s intelligence, but he was open and funny and kind and she wanted to spend time with him.

She hadn’t ever been to the trivia night at the local bowling club, so she wasn’t sure what to expect, or how it all worked. The lady who hosted the quiz gave her an answer sheet and steered her towards a table, telling her the young man with the twinkle in his blue eyes, and the dimpled smile would look after her. That was the moment their story had begun.

#creative writing #tw death #tw hospital #tw cancer #tw sickness #two years without him come Sunday

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followyoursecretsmutblog · 4 years

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the lies you tell IV.

Summary: You and Henry dated for 2 very happy years, when it all came crumbling down. Protection was the only thing on your mind. And now, 3 years later, on a lunch with a common friend, you are hit with the lies you told.

the lies you tell. the lies you tell II. the lies you tell III.

“Chris, are you fucking kidding me? You just find out that I dated someone, and that he was just in my home. And you set me up with someone? Are you out of you fucking mind?” I shout, pulling my hair.

This man cannot possibly be this dim!

“Ava, you said it yourself. You guys can’t be together. You are one of my best friends, I can’t just stand by and see you slowly killing yourself because you are too scared to look for love again.”

“I’m not scared.” I mumble, folding my arms across my chest.

“Yes, you are. Or you would have already dated other men. Or women.” I shoot him a glare, he holds his hands up in fake surrender.

“There is no one else I want. Henry is all I want.” I say, my voice cracking, arms falling to my side.

“Don’t take this personally babe, but if he wanted you, he would have fixed the problem as soon as you told him what it was.” Chris points out.

I look down, not able to meet his gaze. “But, I love him.”

I hear movement, and arms wrap around me. “I know. But sometimes love isn’t enough.” Chris whispers, kissing the top of my head.

I burry my face into his chest, his shirt soaking in my tears. He just holds me, as if he is keeping me from falling completely apart.

Pulling away, I look at him with tear stained cheeks, red eyes and a runny nose, “Do I still have to go on this date?”

Chris chuckles, pushing my hair from my face, “Yes. You aren’t getting out of it.”

“I hate you so much.” I groan, hitting my forehead against his hard chest.

“I love you, too, Ava.” With one last kiss on my head, he spins me around and shoves me toward my room, slapping my ass.

“Who is this dinner with?” I ask, smoothing my hands over my dress, check myself out in the mirror.

I look good. Well, as good as I can.

“It’s a surprise.” Chris replies, poking his head into the bathroom, looking at me. “You look beautiful.”

A smile blush covers my cheeks and I smile at him in return.

“Everything will be fine, I promise. He isn’t some crazy person who is going to kidnap and kill you. He’s a friend of mine. I think you even met him once.” He explains as you two walk out of your apartment and to his car. “Sweet guy. Totally awkward around pretty girls.” He chuckles.

I turn to face him, stopping dead in my tracks. “What have you told him about me?!” I shriek, eyes wide.

“That you are helplessly in love with someone and in need of a good night out.” He looks me dead in the eye. “And then some.” Wiggling eyebrows included.

I don’t know what my face was doing, but Chris’ response to it was hysterical laughter.

“I hate you with everything in me right now.” I huff, stalking toward his car once more.

“Come on, Ava! I told him nothing but good things. I swear!” He laughs as he follows behind me, unlocking the door and opening it.

“The date isn’t with you is it?”

“First, why do you say that with such distaste? I’m wounded, honestly. Second, no. I will not be there. I am only an escort.” I slide into the seat, adjusting myself comfortably.

“I will kill you. I promise.” I grumble as he slides into the driver’s side and starts the engine.

“I would like to see you try.” He chuckles as he pulls away from the carpark.

The time spent driving goes fast. We talk about new projects, vacations and the upcoming holidays.

“You know you are more than welcome to come home with me. My family loves you.”

“I actually think I’m going to go home this year. I miss my family, I haven’t seen them properly since I left.” A sad smile falls on my lips at the thought of when I last saw them. Mum and dad were so supportive of me leaving, thinking it would be best if I were to leave London and start fresh. “But thank you, I know I will have a place in your home and that means everything to me.”

Chris just smiles as he changes lanes. “You are always welcome.” There is a beat of silence. “It’s right up here. Having any second thoughts?”

“Yes.” I answer honestly, “But you are right, I need to get out and try something new.”

“Everything will be fine. Just let loose and be yourself.” He pulls up to the curb, signaling to the attendant to hold on for a moment. “The reservation is under my name.”

“Okay. Thank you, Chris.”

“Ava.” His voice sounding a bit strange, I look up and meet his eyes. “If for any reason you feel uncomfortable, or want to leave you call me, okay? I’ll come back and get you. Okay?”

“I will. I promise.” I give him a smile and lean over to kiss his cheek. “You are an amazing friend, thank you.” He nods and my door opens.

I step out to Chris calling out the window, “Use protection!” I just flip him off, my smile never faltering.

The restaurant is nice, a little to posh for my liking, but nice none the less.

“Hello, Miss, can I help you?” The woman at the hostess stand asks.

“Yes, I’m under the Evans reservation. Chris Evans.” I say softly, trying not to bring attention to myself.

Damn having famous friends.

“Ah! Yes, your other guest had arrived just before you. Please follow me.” With a fake smile and swaying hips, she leads me deep into the heart of the room.

There are so many people here, some that I recognize from tv and magazines.

“I ordered the 1957, not the 1959!” An older gentleman hollers, causing the poor waiter to tremble slightly.

Ohhhkaaayyyyy, a little too rich for my blood.

I turn my attention back to the hostess as she makes a left turn into a nicely lit corner. “Here you are ma’am. Enjoy your dinner.” She says, gesturing toward a table with a candle in the center.

I let out a small thank you and walk closer, trying to see who the man was before he saw me. But he is facing the window, watching everything pass by in a blur.

Come on, Ava. You are a big girl, you can do this. If anything, it’s just one night. Breathe in and out.

I close my eyes for a second, take a deep breath, and open them back up, taking the final step toward the table.

“Hello, I’m Ava.” I say sweetly, my accent making the ‘Hello’ come out as ‘’Ello’.

He turns his head, a nervous smile on his face.

I can’t help but giggle at him, “If it wasn’t Chris, of course it would be you.” Shaking my head, he stands up.

“You know how he is. Like a dog with a bone.” He chuckles, kissing my cheek.

“He’s a child, and we both know it.” I kiss his cheek in return.

With a nod, he pulls away to pull my chair out. Once I sit, he tucks me in and takes his own seat.

“Are you disappointed?” He asks, taking a drink.

“No, of course not. I honestly didn’t know who to expect. But I am happy to see a friendly face.” I look up, meeting the bright blue eyes of Sebastian Stan.

“Chris said this would be your first time out in a while.”

“I am going to kill him.” I roll my eyes as he laughs.

“You know he means well.”

“I could sell him on the black market. Get a pretty penny for him.” I muse as the waiter brings me a glass of wine. “He is very sweet, but sometimes he needs to know he can’t fix everyone’s problems.”

“That won’t stop him from trying.”

We watch the waiter leave after we order, as if we are children waiting for the adults to leave before running amuck.

I turn back to him, his dark hair and blue eyes reminding me of someone else.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Sebastian asks, settling back in his chair.

“About what?”

“Chris asked me to this dinner for you because he knew I was safe. I’m friends with him, and every time we are together we get along. But, I see that every time you look at me, a piece of you isn’t for this.” He answers honestly.

“Seb, I’m sorry. It’s not that I don’t want to be here. You are a great person, and I care for you deeply. I just...” I trail off, looking out the window.

Breathe.

I turn back to him, seeing no judgment in his eyes. “I haven’t gone out on a proper date in years. I dated a guy and now it’s over. First heartbreak sucks.” I laugh at myself, downing half of my glass.

“I get it. So, why don’t we do this.” He sits forward, arms on the table. I watch him, a sneaky smile playing on his lips. “Fuck the idea of this ‘date’, why don’t we just eat, drink a few beers and talk about whatever we want?”

A genuine smile comes from me, “That sounds perfect.”

“Good.” He nods his head, motions for the waiter. “Two beers please.” And turns back to me. “Now, wanna play twenty questions?”

“I swear to you, he did!” Sebastian says as I laugh so hard my stomach hurts.

“There is no way! You have got to be lying!” My sides hurt, I have no idea how I am standing up right. “I know he is a free spirt, but to go skinny dipping? In the middle of winter with all his cast mates? He wouldn’t.”

“I have proof.” I look at him, eyes wide.

“No.” I lean against the wall outside my apartment door, a hand over my heart.

“I do.” He fishes his phone from his pocket, trying to find the video.

“You have a video of Chris. Naked. On your phone?” I wheeze, tears falling.

He stops scrolling, looks at me and nods. “Of course, I do, he’s my friend.” As if it was the most normal thing in the world. “Here it is!” Turning the screen to face me, I watch my drunken friend get undressed and decides to go for a swim.

“He is an absolute nut-case!” I lay my head on Sebastian’s shoulder, both our bodies shaking from laughter.

“I was lucky to get it on camera! I was actually trying to get me singing, but this was way better!” He howls.

We stand there for a moment, one of his arms loosely wrapped around me and my head on his shoulder.

“Thank you, Sebastian. Tonight, was wonderful. Better then I could have imagined.” I say as I pull away.

“Of course. I enjoyed tonight as well.”

“Maybe we can do it again?” I ask, uncertain if he would even want to.

Why would he? I already told him I am emotionally unavailable. He can do so much better.

“I would like that. It was nice getting to know you. Maybe next time it can be more casual.”

“Yeah, not a huge fan of lavish things.” I giggle.

“I’ll call you.” He smiles, leaning down and kisses my cheek. “Until next time, Ava.”

“I look forward to it.” I put my key in my lock and turn, watching him at the elevator doors close.

I sigh as I push the door open. Tonight wasn’t bad at all. It wasn’t awkward or uncomfortable.

I close the door and kick my shoes off as my phone rings.

Chris.

“Isn’t it past your bedtime?” I answer.

“I just wanted to make sure you made it home safely.” He defends.

“I did, thank you. Sebastian was nice enough to walk me to my door.” I pick my shoes up and walk to my room.

“That’s good. How was it?”

“It was fine. We decided to just hangout instead of making it a big deal.” Tossing my shoes in my closet, I start on unzipping my dress.

“Well I’m glad. I knew he was a good choice!” Chris laughs, I can hear Dodger barking in the background.

“Yes, yes. Seb was a good choice.” My straps fall down my arms, “At least you picked someone I had something in common with.”

I turn around, dress falling to the ground, phone slipping and landing with a sharp crack as a small scream falls from my lips.

“Ava? Ava! Are you there? Answer me!” Chris shouts, his voice getting increasingly louder and more aggressive. When I don’t answer, he curses, “Fuck it, I’m on my way!”

I don’t move, my body trembling at the man sitting in my desk chair. I open and close my mouth, trying to say something, but nothing comes out.

The man stands up and take a step toward me.

Tag-list: @thiccgeralt - @mary-ann84- @omgkatinka - @suueeeeeee - @hell1129-blog

A/N: Can you tell I’m a whore for dark haired men with blue eyes?

Also, feedback is greatly appreciated!

#henry cavill #henry cavill imagine #henry cavill one shot #henry cavill x reader #henry cavill fluff #henry cavill smut #the lies you tell #your local human disaster here #yoursecretsmutblog

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