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razzledazzledo · 2 months

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HELL AIN’T A BAD PLACE TO BE - PART ONE

CultLeader!Geto x Non-Sorcerer!Reader

This is my first fic, holy smokes! It's a bit shite, but I wanted to have a crack at some writing again (with added art made by yours truly!) I've got a number of chapters in the making, and I will continue to pump out the arty farty stuff too. There will eventually be sm*t so 18+ ONLY

Word count: 2k

Contents: angst to ? ;), enemies to ? ;)), geto being an ASS, reader taking it like a CHAMP, deffo no lovin' in this one (or the next few chapters most likely), introductions to the story premise, rusty writing and art lol, may be some inconsistencies in story compared to canon timeline

Warnings: depictions of violence, s*icide and d*ath, Geto's choice of words when describing non-sorcerers (monkey)

MDNI

The trickle of blood from the gripping of your palms makes this a reality - this was not a dream, rather a nightmare that you are unfortunate enough to call reality. The flesh of your inner cheek between your teeth keeps you somewhat grounded as you observe your surroundings. Thumping rings in your ears as you stand motionless on the exterior steps of his territory.

It appears that you have arrived at the gates of Hell.

Eyes trail you, as you trail them back, head unmoving as you do so. Keep your cool. They’re watching you - the followers - and intensely at that. You're sure you heard a snicker too. Fantastic.

You avert your eyes back to what's in front of you as you stiffly take the stairs up, ignoring the glares of others. A cobbled pathway appears that leads to his chambers, or rather, your eventual prison.

Breathe.

It could be worse - well actually this is pretty terrible - but reminding yourself of that may have a placebo effect, which you could use to calm yourself down right now.

You were cursed, but not in the literal sense (unfortunately. At least that would have been a more sane reason to be here than what you’re really here for). It's a sick joke - the first non-sorcerer to be born in your family of sorcerers, and you’re the one to appease him of all people? Yeah, this is terrible. The placebo effect isn’t working.

You have been assigned to that man for protection, so long as he receives funding from your family. It’s a liability that you are unable to use sorcery, thus to protect the family from potential dangers or threats, you stand in this disastrous position. They call it an agreement for the sake of your safety, you call it a public execution. You almost laugh out loud at the absurdity of the situation, but you hold out on losing your sanity for a while longer - clutching onto whatever shred of dignity you have left.

It's not even the fear of him that has you wavering. It's the uncertainty of what is to come, the unknown. It’s frightening to the point you have to force a cough out to gain control of the trembling. You’re having to prove yourself more than you ever have by walking into this territory and surviving. You’re used to it - being tossed aside, looked down upon. ‘No cursed energy, and you cannot even see them so what use is there for you?’ It's been a consistent reminder etched into your life. Regardless of the obvious restrictions, you continued to fight and train. But it was never enough, and it never will be. To them, and most certainly to him, you are worthless.

Breathe.

The aroma of bamboo on the sliding door brings you back to reality as you lean on it, palm sweatily resting on the latch. This is it. You squint your eyes shut, pull the door aside, and walk inside, and you can feel it: his aura. It is suffocating, like a thick sludge clogging your airflow and poisoning you in the process. It accelerates your flight response, but you know better: running was never an option. You open your eyes and focus on the floor before tentatively bringing your head up, only to be locked in his sight. Suguru Geto, one of the most feared curse users, is standing in the same room as you.

Passing comments throughout the years provided some insight into the monster in front of you; growing up in a sorcerer household exposed you to the world of curses in a way that few others of your kind had. You knew two things for certain: his cursed technique and his unfathomable hatred for non-sorcerers. It was not unusual to hear about his crimes, which instilled fear throughout Japan. He was cold, calculated, and meticulous with his leadership. Despite this, he was strong, arguably one of the strongest, and having his insurance would ensure your family's protection - you, however, disagree greatly to that perspective.

His gaze penetrates your soul; it's terrifying how unclear his expression is as you stare back silently. He talks after what seems like a lifetime, with a monotone and direct tone.

“I assume you’re the one that has asked for protection?” You swallow dryly, before responding.

“Not myself personally, but my family, yes.” You try to hide your disdain towards the situation, but he clocks the tension behind your words. The corner of his mouth lifts up slightly in what appears to be a smirk.

“Oh? You don't think you need protecting?” He sounds somewhat amused at your response. Great.

You pause before responding honestly “...I don’t.” The smirk from his lips widens and your stomach drops to the floor.

“How pitiful. Not only are you a mere monkey in comparison to us, but a delusional one too. You should know better coming from a family of sorcerers.” He tuts at you before shifting his stance by placing his thumb and index finger under his chin. “Tell me, why has your family come crawling to me for protection if you are so sure of yourself? Entertain me.”

You clench your fists slightly, not wavering your gaze towards him as you ignore his mocking tone. “I have my ways of fighting despite my limitations. They don’t believe me, which is why I’m here. It shouldn’t be their responsibility to protect me, I don’t want to be a burden-”

“And yet here you stand in my territory, abiding by your family's wishes. Delusional and spineless too? What redeeming qualities you have” he interjects sharply, huffing out a laugh before sighing “I suppose it's to be expected from your kind.” Your eye twitches in response to his comment, and he adjusts position again. He takes a seat on the tatami flooring, reclining on his side, holding his head up with one hand while pointing his finger at you with the other, closing his eyes. He speaks almost as if he were bored:

"If you didn't want to be a burden, you should have offed yourself instead of agreeing to this, no? At the very least, you'd have done something to make the world a little better."

His statement clearly reveals the shock on your face. He's not entirely wrong; you've considered doing that more than you'd want to admit. Regardless, you maintain your composure and answer harshly, standing up to your own beliefs and shrugging off any seeds of doubt.

"I want to survive. I want to show that I am capable of holding my own in this disgusting world.”

He looks at you calmly before smiling and opening one eye, pointing to the sky. "Well, if you're so sure that's what you want to do-" His aura shifts to something more sinister "-then survive."

The clap of force against your face and the spring air rushing into your nostrils makes you aware that you've been attacked, your body thrown outdoors into the courtyard. You fall to a shaky landing, still reeling from the event. The warm trickle of blood from your nostril puts things in perspective: Geto has unleashed a cursed spirit for you to combat. That fucker - you should have known something like this would happen.

You let the blood flow down past your lips and drop off your chin while you concentrate. You quickly reach behind you for your weapon, which is securely connected to your back. A four-part staff releases with a crack, chains clattering and angled blades on the ends gleaming in the sun. You swing them about, producing momentum and, at the same time, a barrier between yourself and the invisible force as you plot your fighting strategy. At this stage, you're relying on your senses and predictions of its strikes. You don’t even know what grade this entity is.

“If you die that’s not a problem, I have my ways of finding alternative funds.” Geto casually states as he walks out of his chambers through the hole formed by the propelled attack, arms placed in his sleeves. Some followers gather, clearly alerted by the commotion.

Now is not the time to concentrate on him, you reason as you close your eyes and focus on your senses. You sense it approaching from your right side and whip your beams towards the aura, hearing a solid smack - a decent hit. You turn about and aim for another hit with greater strength, now knowing where it is - it lands again, pushing the aura further away from yourself. If you can maintain this dynamic, you may have the advantage in the fight.

The fight continues in a similar manner, with you sensing the location of the curse and smacking it with your staff. It works initially, but after your last strike, it begins to learn your tactics and responds by redirecting your spears to the side, then landing a direct hit to the stomach, pushing you backwards once more. You stumble to the ground and wince at your injury, coughing up blood, before steadily returning to your combat posture. You slap your spears together, and they form a pole, holding it out in front of you in preparation for their next attack. Despite this, you were unprepared for what was to occur.

An abrupt shift in the fight throws you off-guard. A little girl runs into the battle towards you, completely unaware of the danger, while another girl of similar age gleefully chases her. They rapidly discover they've entered a dangerous zone and freeze behind you, but it's too late to back out. You hear the shrill cries of the followers, and you react.

The cursed spirit hits again, but this time you take a defensive stance, forcing the curse against your weapon. You're grunting from the strain of attempting to keep the spirit at away with your brute power. You shout, temporarily increasing the strength in your arms as you push the monster away from yourself and the children behind you. Once you believe there is enough distance between them and the threat, you immediately reach out to detour the girls away from the area, only to be confronted by Geto. He looms over you, standing between the children and you. He firmly grips your outstretched arm, squeezing your wrist tightly, and looks down at you with underlying rage in his cold, purple irises.

"Don't touch them" His voice is tinged with venom as he continues to look you down, feeling like prey caught in the predator's snare. You freeze in place, and then realise that the curse's aura has vanished; he must have released it. He throws your wrist to the side and turns his back on you, resting his hands on the girls' heads. The blonde girl is sniffling, and the other, brunette, is staring at you with an unreadable expression.

He speaks over your shoulder in a harsh tone, "Manami will accompany you to your chambers. Leave, now.” Before you realise, a lady appears beside you and it startles you. She holds a tablet in hand, and carries an intense blue gaze focused in your direction. She takes one look at you, noticing the twitch in her eye, before turning around and walking away. You assume to follow her, so you carefully disengage your weapon and walk (or rather limp) behind her. You look over your shoulder towards Geto as you leave the vicinity.

"Laure, take the girls to their rooms," he says unusually calmly. A male figure appears next to Geto, with blonde hair and an intense physique. He effortlessly picks up the girls and exits the area in another direction, nodding.

"Everyone else, please stay” He smiles. “It appears that some of you need a reminder on what happens when rules are broken.” You turn a bend, losing sight of the courtyard. All you hear in the coming moments is the spine-chilling screams from that direction, alongside the sensation of multiple monstrous auras, which makes your blood run cold. You turn to face Manami's back as you follow her towards your chambers, silently coming to terms with the reality that your life is in the hands of Suguru Geto from this point forth.

Breathe.

Thanks for the read guys <3 I will draw out readers weapon and some other scenes from this part alongside finishing off the second part - stay tuned and much love

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aprilisque · 1 year

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do you want it I hueningkai

Pairing: Stranger! Hueningkai x You

Rating: 18+, MDNI

Warnings: drinking, dirty talk, choking, thigh grinding, kai and y/n keep teasing each-other to the limits, implied sex, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it, folks!), mostly unedited.

Word Count: 3.3k words

Summary: you meet hueningkai at a party. the attraction between the two of you is undeniable and things slowly start to escalate into the night, a game of teasing which neither of you is willing to lose.

Recommended Songs: mi casa su casa (omar rudberg), tinnitus demo (ebby), party monster tiktok version (the weekend).

your heels clink against the marbled floor, following an even rhythm as you roll your shoulders back and keep your head high. it had been awhile since you'd been to a party and when the hotel you were staying it offered it as an event a few days ago, you were more than eager to participate. good music and alcohol? you were sold. your friends were sold too. you could see them seated on the bar, cocktails in hand as they giggle with one-another.

"hey," you greet, leaning on the counter next to them.

"you're late." yeji remarks, her cat like eyes taking in your appearance. after turning your closet upside down, you'd settled on a bodycon midi dress. the silky material is soft on the skin, hugging your figure just right, the shade of blue complimenting your undertones well. you look absolutely stunning and you know it, cocky smile threatening to tug at your lips as you wait for yeji to say something. but she looks just as good herself with her black mini dress and curled red locks.

before yeji can say anything, kazuha peers over at you from behind her, the red two piece dress striking against the color of her dark hair. "but she's always late. fashionably late."

you grin in response, satisfied to hear that they liked your outfit. "thank you, ladies. you both look stunning as well." eyes wandering to the cocktails on their hands, you nod at them. "so what did you order?"

"i got a cuba libre, while kazuha got the strawberry margarita." yeji explains, taking another sip. "they have tons of different cocktails on their menu over there."

"they offer the first drink for free, so just order whatever." kazuha says, swaying to the rhythm of the music playing in the background. the rooftop of the hotel doesn't seem as packed as you expected it to be. surrounded in glass railing, the shades of brown and green from the statement plants and furniture around you make you think of a tropical jungle. string lights are woven into each-other above your head, seemingly competing with the stars of the night sky and somewhere in the distance, you can faintly hear the sounds of the waves crashing. chatter and laughter surrounds you with some people already moving against another on the dance floor. you can't wait to join them, but you feel too sober to dance.

turning towards the handsome barista, you order three shots, ignoring the way yeji raises a brow and kazuha stares at you, stunned. it was so unlike you. but the past week had been quite rough and you were hoping for a quick stress release through drinking and dancing. and well, something else too.

"looks like we've got a real party animal over here." yeji remarks, watching you down the second shot in less than a second before grabbing the third one. the liquid burns at your throat, relaxing your muscles almost in an instant. maybe the alcohol hadn't hit yet and this was some sort of placebo effect. you associated alcohol with being relaxed after all. or maybe alcohol worked that fast. "slow down, tiger. i don't think drinking three shots with two seconds apart is a good idea."

"last time i drank like that, i spent the rest of the night throwing up in the bathroom. it was terrible." kazuha cringes, setting her now empty glass down. "you and yeji had to hold my hair back all night long."

"everyone thinks they can take a lot the first time they drink." yeji shrugs. "but at least you know your limits now."

"yeah, one drink and a half. i'm such a lightweight."

"drinking a lot isn't a party requirement." you clarify, before downing your last shot. the sweet aftertaste lingers in your mouth as a pleasant buzz spread all over your body. it feels as if you are feather light, the room around you feeling more like a boat than anything else. the chatter around you seems to disappear with only the sound of music being heard as you allow its rhythm to guide your body to the dance floor, letting it take over and move you whichever way it wanted.

yeji and kazuha soon join you, the three of you hyping each-other up and becoming one with the rest of the sweaty bodies on the dance floor. you feel amazing, confidence coursing through your veins as your moves become more sensual. the music drowns you, seizing you at once and making everything else around you disappear. only the euphoric feeling of each movement as you let loose, losing yourself in the dance floor.

and then, through the crowd of dancing bodies, near the sitting areas, you spot him. he's leaning back on the cream coloured couch, curly black hair long enough to almost cover his eyes. his features are quite sharp, but his hooded eyes seem to offset that - giving him this soft look overall, but there's this almost magnetic aura to him that has you slowly pulling away from the dance floor. the beer bottle in his hand is half empty when you walk over to him, his gaze taking you in in a way that makes you flush. he was insanely attractive and the curve to his lips only seemed to confirm that.

"liked what you saw out there?" you ask before you can stop yourself, taking the empty seat next to him before internally cringing at your choice of an opening. really? that was terrible. you know, this is part of the reason why you shouldn't drink before talking to people at parties. because you would say stuff like this. they would sound good in theory, but in practice they were cringe. it took only 3 seconds for you to ruin a possible hookup. maybe you should just get up and go.

to your surprise, he chuckles, amusement evident in his eyes. "hard not to when you look like that."

heat floods your body while he runs his eyes over your body, wolfish grin on his lips when he meets your gaze once again. "what's your name?"

"y/n. what's yours?"

"kai."

"so, kai," you begin, propping your elbow against the back of the couch as you angle your body towards him, your dress slightly riding up your thighs. "why aren't you on the dance floor?"

you don't miss the way his eyes graze at your thighs, throat bobbing before he looks back up at you, a lazy smirk on his face. "i'm more of a watcher than a dancer."

"is that so?" you ask, head tilting to the side as your eyes scan him. his legs in particular catch your attention due to the way he shifts, taking up even more room. slowly, you inch closer to him, monitoring his reaction as you place a hand on one of his thighs. you didn't want to be too much, ready to step back the moment he'd show the slightest discomfort. but he doesn't seem uncomfortable in the slightest, instead sucking in a breath as he waits for your next move. tracing circle patterns in his inner thigh, you look up at him with your doe eyes. "you look like you'd be a great dancer."

scoffing, a roguish grin settles into his face as he leans closer, the smell of pine hitting your nose. his hand settles on top of yours, stopping you from going up any further. "you're not playing fair." he exhales, hooded eyes gazing down into yours. "you do this a lot, huh?"

"no, not really. you're special." you coo, brushing your lips against his ear. the way his breath hitches brings a smile to your face as he turns to look at you, faces only inches apart. his gaze is almost piercing and you can feel it burning into your skin, demanding attention and captivating you at the same time. as his stare lingers, curving your lips upwards, you tap your fingers against his thigh once again, bringing him out of whatever trance you'd pulled him in. "so then, interested in joining me on the dance floor? i promise i won't bite."

"fine. lead the way." he smiles, setting the beer bottle on the table as he follows after you, hot on your heels. as you weave your way through the crowd, you can feel your body buzzing with each brush of his chest against your back. you're not sure if it's a coincidence anymore, especially not when his breath is hot on the back of your neck. shivering, you turn your head slightly to look at him. feigning innocence, he raises a brow, but you don't miss the way the corner of his mouth twitches, threatening to blow his cover.

eventually you make your way to the centre of the floor, turning around to look at him through the now dimmed lights. the music swells, coursing through your body and letting it take over as you move, not missing a single beat. kai follows, his moves hypnotising as he embodies the provocative vibe of the song. his dress shirt hangs loosely on his torso, the first three buttons undone to expose the smooth skin of his chest and yet, your eyes can't help but trail even lower, on the tight black jeans stretched across his thighs. it's almost devastating, how good he looks in this outfit.

closing the gap between you, he tilts your chin upwards. "eyes up here, angel."

flushing, you meet his amused gaze. the smell of pine is dizzying and so is the look in his eyes, filled with a heat you can't ignore. it's almost as if he's cast a spell on you, drawing you. your heart skips a beat as your body tingles with anticipation, arms moving to wrap around his neck as you flash a lazy smile. his hands grip at your hips, guiding your movements to match his.

electricity's in the air, skin sparking at his every touch in pleasure. and when he spins you around, you tug yourself backwards, pressing up against him in a way that makes him hiss, gripping your hips. the reaction alone sparks something within you as you begin to grind up against him. he grunts in your ear, the sound music to your ears as you continue your movements, teasing him even more until he spins you around, dipping you with ease. "you're bad, huh?" he whispers, lips grazing a path from your neck to your ear. your breathing is laboured as you tilt your head back, feeling your skin catch on fire on the places he's touched. still holding you in that position, the fingertips of his free hand trail down the bare skin of your thigh, hooking under your knee and pulling you to press towards him. you nearly moan, desire filling every inch of you as you stare at him heatedly, noting the same desire in his eyes as his stare lingers on your lips.

it's not until you spot yeji and kazuha looking at you from the corner of your eye, both of them giving you a thumbs up as they wear an expression that seems to say "good job" that you realise how long you've been standing there like that. turning a deep shade of red, your eyes meet kai's bashfully before you clear your throat and get out of the position you were in. confusion swirls in his dark brown eyes. just a moment ago you were almost willing to take him right there and then and now you're stepping away?

"let's get something to drink," you say in his ear and when he nods, you simply grab his hand and walk towards the bar with him. you're embarrassed your friends saw this side of you, but you guess it couldn't be helped.

the tension between you and kai is still there when you sit down. there's barely a gap left between the two of you, his arm stretched on the back of the couch behind you. with your drinks gone, only desire remains, hanging in the air like a palpable, electric current. it brings shivers down your spine as your heart picks up its pace in anticipation. there's a magnetism in kai's eyes, heat and temptation swirling in them dangerously. you can almost taste it - the sweet fragrance of a blooming flower, an alluring itch that demands to be satisfied.

leaning closer as if in a trance, you note the way his breath hitches, eyes landing on your lips with the same desire. he waits, gaze switching between your lips and eyes repeatedly, eyes fluttering shut when you lean to close in the distance. your lips press against the corner of his instead, willing to continue the teasing game from earlier in the midst of being overridden with the desire to kiss him with a force and passion that will leave you both breathless. you did enjoy teasing him after all, you think as you steal kisses along his sensitive pulse and sharp jaw while your hand moves back to the same spot on his thigh. a groan vibrates from his throat as he chuckles, throwing his head back at the predicament he's in. of course you would tease him like this. you'd been doing it this whole time tonight. but he'd had enough of it.

kai's hand tilts your chin to face him, thumb pushing past your lips and settling on your tongue. you still, feeling heat pool in your stomach as his gaze flares, hand slowly moves down from your chin and onto your neck. "this what you wanted?" he whispers, lips brushing against yours in a way that drives you insane, the slight pressure on your neck leaving you dazed. he notes that, smug smile playing across his lips. "you like that, don't you? you want me to choke you a little more, y/n?"

you pant in response, needily moving closer to press your lips to his, but he smirks, holding you in place. it seems he enjoys having you under him like this, drunk with the desire to chase after his lips and desperate to get a taste. "you're such a tease." you groan, unable to take it anymore as you bite on your lip.

"look who's talking," he grins before finally pressing his lips against yours. melting into the kiss, your hands slide up his silk dress shirt, tangling into his hair as you pull him closer. groaning, he cages you in against the couch, sweeping at your bottom lip with his tongue. you don't oblige, smirking into the kiss with each failed attempt to gain entry. maybe you were a bit petty from the earlier teasing and maybe this was your way of getting him back.

pressing you harder against the soft surface, you yelp when his fingers pinch at the soft flesh of your thigh, easily giving him access. rough and determined strokes have your head spinning as you moan into the kiss, pushing yourself against him. one of his hands has made its way under your dress, toying with the waistband of your underwear while the other massages your waist with his thumb. bitting on his lower lip, you break the kiss to catch some air while his lips trail down your neck, teeth scraping the base of your throat.

"fuck," you whine, rubbing your thighs together to ease some of the discomfort you were feeling down there. "you want to get out of here?"

"get out of here?" he repeats, eyes glinting as he notices the way you're all hot and bothered and it's all because of him. you were so cute with your reddened cheeks and swollen lips. feeling his pants tighten, he shifts once more, watching you rub your thighs once again impatiently. god, he couldn't wait to be in you and ruin you. he almost got up, ready to leave this party, but then an idea crossed his mind. gaze darkening, he tugs you closer whilst parting your thighs with his. there's a challenging smirk on his face as he waits.

there's absolutely no way, you think, staring up at him in disbelief. he isn't seriously asking you to ride his thigh in public? when you don't say anything, he smiles, tilting his head whilst pressing his knee against your aching core. "you seemed so eager to touch me here earlier, don't tell me you're all shy now?"

"you're insane," you whisper, almost sobering up as you nervously look around. it's not that you didn't want to, it's that he seemed to enjoy to see you in these positions, ruined and desperate for him and now everyone else would see that too. if they paid attention, you think, noticing the way the drunk ones are all dancing and the tipsy ones are flirting with one-another in other seating areas. still, it's quite risky to do something like this in an open space where everyone can see you, but it also gave you a thrill, pulse quickening as you stare at kai for a beat longer before pressing yourself closer. heart in your throat, you begin moving your hips up and down, the material of his black jeans providing that much needed friction. sparks fly up your body, producing heat as a layer of sweat glistens on your skin. you notice the way kai sharply inhales, hands moving to your hips to guide a more stable rhythm as you wrap your arms around his neck, whining into his ear with each roll of your hips. "this what you wanted? me fucked out on your thigh?"

"you're so fucking hot," comes his response, breath hot in your ear as your stomach tightens. you speed up your pace, throwing your head back in pleasure. you don't care anymore if anyone's watching you get off on kai's thigh while chanting his name like a prayer. you wanted him. you wanted him so badly.

"kai, please. . ."

"please what?"

you hiss, glaring at him as you continue your movements. you were starting to grow impatient now. it's true that you were the one that started this game of teasing, but you weren't expecting him to keep going. the smug expression on his face seems to irritate you even more. "god, maybe i should just fuck that smile of yours off your face." your voice is low, sultry enough to make him picture it clearly as you continue, your frustration showing. "you're being too cocky, stalling too much."

your words take kai by surprise. he looks down at you, lips parted as heat creeps up his face. raising a brow, you suddenly feel him pressing against your thigh and maybe it's your turn to be cocky. "you like that? me riding your face? using it to get myself off?"

"shit," he groans, pulling away, eyes hazy with lust. "let's go."

signalling to your friends that you're going to be leaving with him, you let him guide you to the elevator. as soon as the doors close, his mouth hungrily devours yours once more with a carnal greed whilst his arm hooks itself under one of your thighs, grinding himself against you almost impatiently. your teasing game had gone on for far too long, riling both of you up as you moan into his mouth, running your hands over his chest before beginning to unbutton his shirt. when the elevator dings and the doors open, you don't break from each-other, instead stumbling down the hallway and into his hotel room as you sloppily remove pieces of clothing from each-other. somehow, you make it onto the bed and kai's already in you before you can so much as say anything else.

𓈒⠀𓂃⠀⠀˖⠀𓇬⠀˖⠀⠀𓂃⠀𓈒

reblogs and feedbacks are highly appreciated!

#txt #txt imagines #txt oneshot #txt smut #txt hard hours #txt hard thoughts #hueningkai #hueningkai txt #hueningkai imagines #hueningkai smut #hueningkai hard hours #hueningkai hard thoughts #minors dni #hueningkai oneshot #hueningkai x fem reader #txt x fem reader #i've never written smut before so this might be messy #anyways hope you enjoy

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jbbuckybarnes · 8 months

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How Peter Parker would comfort and care for a depressed loved one

(don't mind me, just some self-indulgence I wrote when I was in the trenches of depression)

• "No, no, no, what we're not gonna do is feel guilty. This world is a depressing place when the rest of you isn't stable. And the world loves making people unstable."

• He'd meal prep for you, wake you up on time to keep your rhythm in check, bring you sleep tea, watch movies with you on particularly bad days.

• "What's your current take on going outside? Vitamin D might do you good." He'd ask cautiously.

• You'd tense up at the idea of spending more energy than you had but knew it was needed to get better.

• "I can...carry you to the rooftop?" He'd raise his brow.

• You'd do grabby hands at him from the bed.

• You'd chill on the sunny rooftop for 45 minutes every now and then, not talking much, just existing.

• "What are your thoughts on therapy?" He'd mumble a few weeks down the line.

• "The only thing my insurance covers is CBT. I fucking hate CBT."

• "What if we figure out a way to pay someone you can choose?"

• "I don't wa-" "Na-ah, friends help friends survive."

• Please imagine Spider-Man making a couple extra bucks by helping people install solar panels and carrying heavy stuff.

• He'd sit down next to you with a laptop and you'd search for therapy options.

• "DBT. IFS. EFT. The other EFT. Hypnotherapy. Logo Therapy. Integrative Therapists for Psychedelics. Somatic Experiencing." Even he was overwhelmed with the option.

• "IFS. Hypnotherapy. Maybe Logo Therapy." You mumbled and he decluttered the tabs.

• You landed on a woman doing both IFS & Hypnotherapy. Both things that intrigued you.

• "I mean if nothing else works...drugs still exist." You'd shrug and he'd smirk at that.

• He'd bring you to your first appointment giving you the biggest hug before you went in.

• The woman would explain to you that you needed to get mentally resourced first and that she'd try with a specific type of hypnosis to see if that helps.

• When Peter saw you get out of the building he'd instantly put his arm around you while walking.

• "I'm so tired." You'd mumble leaning against him while walking, trusting him to lead the way while you were spacing out, "Gonna tell you about it after a long sleep."

• You'd wake up the next morning with energy. Still depressed, but not quite as depressed as the previous days. He slept over to make sure there were no weird aftereffects.

• You would look at him sleeping and get up to make yourself something simple to eat.

• He'd peek his eye open before both of them were wide open seeing you standing in the kitchen.

• "Woah." He mumbled before getting up and hugging you.

• "How was it?" You paused for a second, "That's what he said."

• You told him what the hypnosis felt like and that you went back to the origin of your depression and did some inner child work thing. And the hypnosis took a lot more out of you than you expected. And now you had more energy and hoped it wasn't short-form placebo.

• "Even if it is, she can still do the other work with you." You nodded.

• "Can we go for a short walk?" He'd eagerly nod.

• Over the weeks you'd get better and better at coping with your symptoms and connecting to your inner parts. You'd figure out your triggers and how to calm yourself out of them.

• He'd love to see you flourish and take you on little friend (👀) dates all across New York City the more energy you'd have.

• He'd make sure you'd keep seeing the beautiful things in the world. He'd program your TV to not show news. He'd actually send you good news deliberately.

• "We should live together." You'd suggest.

• "If you can handle the feds searching the apartment at some point." He'd giggle.

• "I'd be good with that. I'd hide little things making it awkward for them." You both laughed.

#peter parker imagine #peter parker #Spider-Man #spiderman #depressed reader #peter parker x reader #Peter Parker x you #peter parker x y/n #marvel #mcu #marvel cinematic universe #mine #peter parker fluff #hypnosis #spider man no way home #spider man far from home #spider man fluff #spider man fanfiction

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miya-twins · 8 months

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sick rn so have some hcs of the twins being sick

they're both super whiny if sick. you'd expect it from atsumu but osamu is the same, he wants to be pampered!

atsumu learned his lesson from kita sending him home once, and properly rests whenever he feels sickness coming on, even if he'd much rather play volleyball

meanwhile osamu just puts on a mask and goes on working if he feels like he can. until the day kita comes to deliver him rice and scolds him for working when sick. he's never risking a stare that icy ever again

they always get sick at the same time. when they still lived together they never really wondered about it - they eat the same food, are around the same people in the same temperatures and breathe the same air all while sharing an immune system, obviously they'd both get sick if one of them does. but the first time atsumu is living on his own and gets sick he calls osamu like "hey you're a chef now and I'm sick come make me some soup" and osamu just coughs into the receiver like "forget it bro I can barely get up" so they just chalk it up to twin magic (aka they keep blaming each other if they get sick like "hey I have an important game coming up how dare you get sick and drag me down with you" "fuck off you went out in the cold with no jacket again and here I am, suffering" "that's because you took my jacket >:(" "that was always MY jacket you asshat!")

they always watch old movies from when they were little kids when they're sick. their mom put some on to shut them up when they were tiny, and now it's essential to them getting better. if they can, they'll watch together even after moving out, even if just through a voice call. and even if that means fighting over whether they should watch the third or the fourth pokemon movie. osamu likes daddy entei but atsumu always get emotional over the sammy oak plot twist

worst thing about being sick for atsumu is not getting to move around. like he'll enjoy laying in bed for a couple hours and then gets restless. worst thing for osamu is that food tastes weird when sick. his biggest joy taken away :(

atsumu is horrible at swallowing pills because he has a strong gag reflex, osamu is horrible at swallowing pills because they taste nasty and he spits them back out on instinct

if all else fails, they call their mom to make them her homemade soup, the placebo effect of that is so strong it'll cure whatever they have like a miracle

if left alone together when sick, they will bicker and fight until they're too exhausted to keep going, then cuddle up to each other and fall asleep like that

#miya atsumu #miya osamu #miya twins #kita shinsuke #haikyuu

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josephseedismyfather · 3 months

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Music (it's not) Monday (anymore)

I was tagged by @inafieldofdaisies for this a few days ago, but I miss it so much, I'm gonna go ahead and do one. It's been a hot minute since I've shared, well, anything really. Thank you for the tag! 🥰

Afflicted.

I love the way you look at me I feel the pain you place inside You lock me up inside your dirty cage While I'm alone inside my mind I like to teach you all the rules I get to see them set in stone I like it when you chain me to the bed But then your secrets never show

I need to feel you You need to feel me I can't control you You're not the one for me, no I can't control you You can't control me I need to feel you So why's there even

I love the way you rake my skin I feel the hate you place inside I need to get your voice out of my head 'Cause I'm that guy you'll never find I think you know all of the rules There's no expressions on your face I hope that someday you will let me go Release me from my dirty cage

I love the way you look at me I love the way you smack my ass I love the dirty things you do I have control of you

Parenesis.

Without a life vest, I'd be stuck again Wish I was much more masculine Maybe then I could learn to swim Like (14 miles away)

Now floating up and down I spin, colliding into sound Like whales beneath me diving down I'm sinking to the bottom of my- Everything that freaks me out The lighthouse beam has just run out I'm cold as cold as cold can be, be

Where is the coastguard? I keep looking each direction For a spotlight, give me something I need something for protection Maybe flotsam junk will do just fine The jetsam sunk, I'm left behind I'm treading for my life, believe me (How can I keep up this breathing?)

Not knowing how to think I scream aloud, begin to sink My legs and arms are broken down With envy for the solid ground I'm reaching for the life within me How can one man stop his ending? I thought of just your face Relaxed, and floated into space

Now waking to the sun I calculate what I had done Like jumping from the bow, yeah Just to prove that I knew how, yeah It's midnight's late reminder of The loss of her, the one I love My will to quickly end it all Sat front row in my need to fall

Into the ocean, end it all

Untitled Johnny WIP.

A friend in need's a friend indeed A friend with weed is better A friend with breasts and all the rest A friend who's dressed in leather A friend in need's a friend indeed A friend who'll tease is better Our thoughts compressed, which makes us blessed And makes for stormy weather

A friend in need's a friend indeed My Japanese is better And when she's pressed, she will undress And then she's boxing clever A friend in need's a friend indeed A friend who bleeds is better My friend confessed she passed the test And we will never sever

Day's dawning, skin's crawling Day's dawning, skin's crawling Day's dawning, skin's crawling Day's dawning, skin's crawling Pure morning Pure morning Pure morning Pure morning

Tagging, with apologies for doubles and no pressure! @wrathfulrook, @socially-awkward-skeleton, @trench-rot, @vampireninjabunnies-blog, @ladyoriza, @cassietrn, @redreart, @hotmessteaparty, @g0dspeeed, @v0idbuggy, @insanityofvaas, @simplegenius042, @malefiquinn, @strangefable, @noodlecupcakes, @chazz-anova, @aristomal, @ocdemon-747, @outlastic, @carlosoliveiraa, @la-grosse-patate, and anybody else who wants to share. Tag me! 😘

#music monday #afflicted: harley & jacob #parenesis: evangeline & joseph #untitled johnny wip #far cry 5 wip #wip playlist #music tag games #spotify #tagged 🖤#Spotify

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calpalsworld · 22 days

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I just realized Im over 6 months on T...!!!

My genuine review of T for others who may be considering or just interested in the topic.

Keep in mind that everyone will have different results on T. For me I am on a small dose because my T levels were already high to begin with.

Reasons why I went on T:

Was living out publicly as non binary but I would still feel upset when strangers would misgender me.

Had been wishing that I was more masc body wise and voice wise since at least high school.

Didn't have intense dysphoria but I felt very neutral about my body. It felt strange and like it wasn't progressing how I imagined it would. I had certain features that pissed me off, which I knew T would change.

Dysphoria was triggered in public interactions and when I had to acknowledge my body by myself. I felt like strangers weren't seeing me as me, and felt that I wasn't experiencing my body in the way I wanted to.

Pros:

Everything!!!

Voice that surprises me with how deep it is sometimes. When I lean back against a chair and speak I can feel my diaphragm rumble.

Menstruation stopped almost immediately.

(May be TMI but this is a major thing yet the only thing that I did not know was going to happen before starting). Rapid and significant genital changes. Psychologically helpful for me.

Hairier arms, stomach, and thighs.

Stomach fat and face fat increase. (potentially boob and thigh fat decrease but it may be placebo or just in contrast).

More facial fuzz.

Slightly veinier hands.

Slightly thicker/more muscular arms.

Looking at myself and seeing someone who looks good and confident and masc/butch and feeling great about it. Sometimes I look at myself in the reflections of building windows and get excited.

Being able to discuss T with other friends who are on T.

People misgender me as he/him and a man (Im non binary and go by they/them) more often than misgendering me as she/her and a woman now. This is still not ideal but it bugs me less.

Random queer strangers asking "are you on T!?" and being excited.

Knowing I dont have to live my life as a lie.

Cons:

My pre existing erotophobia (I'm triggered and obsessive over certain things relating to sex) has been activated as I experience new things.

My pre existing paranoia being rebranded into a trans related experience (I worry sometimes people are stalking me and planning to kill me for the slightest things I do wrong, now I worry that its because Im trans). This will go away once I work through my mental illness and internalized bigotry.

Voice hurt when the changes started (like a sore throat for a few weeks as if I was sick).

I cant do a lot of funny voices that I liked doing anymore, but I can do new voices.

New and strange sensations in genital area, during the first few weeks it was very painful (I have Pelvic Floor Dysfunction and Vaginismus so this may not be a universal experience).

Became slightly stinkier and oilier when I started, but it seems to have gone away.

I'm non binary and I still feel connected to women and I get anxious that people won't be able to comprehend that. (examples: others might not like me calling myself "butch" or sharing my experiences with womanhood). But this is internal rather than reflective of anything I've experienced. This may be entirely in my head.

Family awkwardness. Family members assuming crazy stories about how I feel. (generic things like: thinking i hate myself and am scared of men so i want to turn myself into a man?!?!😭😭😭). But friends and others do not assume these things.

(TMI but true) Thick buttcrack hair is annoying.

Future thoughts:

I feel very fortunate that my experience with T is going very well.

I know the best parts of T takes time and patience to become apparent so I am excited that I started at 21.

I am proud of achieving what I thought might only be a fantasy, and I hope I can have access to T for the rest of my life.

#transmasc #testosterone #trans hrt

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roxineedstosleep · 1 year

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Baby Trap... by Aemond Targaryen

I remembered a headcanon I have from Lucemond.

So, for no one in the fandom it is strange to think or consider possible that the Targaryens have a breeding fetish.

But, for some reason, I've seen several posts on Aemond having this fetish. How did they get there? I don't know, but he gave me sooo many ideas.

Which brings me to the next thing, I'm pretty sure Aemond would fuck with Lucerys' contraceptive methods to get him pregnant, thus trapping him with his baby.

so... there it goes. --------------------------------------------

Aemond, no matter what universe it is in, whether or not Lucerys can be left with a baby inside her... he would look for the ultimate way to trap Lucerys with him permanently.

Of course, Aemond knows that he will become a careful father and will not look after anything other than his family, he really wants to be a father. Only that he takes advantage of his wish to use it as a kind of secret letter to keep Lucerys by his side.

So, he barely has the opportunity, he's going to take it. Believe me when I tell you that he will do everything possible.

Within historical canon time, should they be able to have a baby of their own: Aemond will make sure Moon tea is modified, changed, or simply make Lucerys forget to drink it. Or he'll make sure Lucerys never properly learns about how babies are made, so he can manipulate his concept until the time comes when pregnancy is safe and there’s not rick at all.

At the time, I feel like Lucerys may know that babies come when both adults come together, but he doesn't know everything in fine detail.

In some Alternative Universe within the same situation of the possibility of having a baby of their own, especially the modern one: Aemodn will make its pills just placebos and change them for prenatals, condoms will always have holes or are already spoiled, and it will pretend that they broke on the spot , he will give his boyfriend hormone pills inside his drinks or inside his food to make sure everything is ready. Aemond will keep track of his fertile dates, and all.

In the modern setting it's the only scenario where Aemond can't keep Lucerys fooled about the process of making babies, as it's a relatively more educated environment and I doubt Lucerys doesn't learn abput it outside his home; like the school.

Sure, all dark, of course. We are talking at the end about how Aemond wants to make sure Lucerys can't leave him.

But only if Lucerys stays innocent about it.

What would happen if it was Lucerys not so? If our sweet boy actually, he thinks very similar to Aemond, but he didn't really take any active initiative about it.

Aemond does not realize that his boyfriend is always available on his most fertile days. He doesn't notice when his boyfriend avoids her leaving his bed or leaving it unfilled at all costs. Lucerys never peep about it, he do not mind at all.

He doesn't notice how his boyfriend takes half of the moon tea and throws the rest next to a pot inside the room. After all, boys cannot have babies, isn’t it? or simply the risk of having a baby is too low.

He doesn't notice how his boyfriend, his sweet boy, always lies in positions that facilitate the process of having a baby. Is just so¿uch a confy position.

As his little boyfriend never buys the condoms, even though Aemond always uses the broken ones every time or doesn't notice that he always asks him to use the old one found in Aemond's wallet. Those help in any way, right?

He never notices, doesn't notice when Lucerys always takes hormone pills "to stay on a regular cycle" that Aemond buy for him. Just do not tell Aemond that he might forget some of them.

#lucemond #lucemond imagine #ship: lucemond #lucerys velaryon #aemond x lucerys #lucerys x aemond #aemond targaryen #aemond loves lucerys #aemond has a breeding kink #lucerys has a breeding kink #These two idiots are going to bring old Valyria back to life... just because they like having babies.

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withoutyouimsaskia · 1 year

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Remember Me, Special Dreams

Part XXV. Epilogue

GIF: Originally posted by @thekingofkawai

Summary: Self-insert. You're having trouble with recurring night terrors and Morpheus pays you a visit. (Title from the lyrics of Placebo’s Special Needs)

Warnings: language, angst, mentions of night terrors. 18+ Minors DNI. Smut, AMAB oral receiving, penetrative sex (AFAB+AMAB)

Word Count: 2.1k

A/N: Hello there dearest readers. Here it is. The final chapter of Remember Me, Special Dreams. I won’t replicate all the sentiments I wrote about in my post here but just know that I love and appreciate every single one of you who has read this story. Until next time, all my love, Saskia ❤️

Sandman Masterlist

-----------------

5 Years Later

The weekend bag weighing down your dominant hand is what you focus on as you de-materialise in an eddying haze. Despite having travelled this way countless times, you still get anxious about doing it alone. Getting out of your head by connecting with your senses was a good way of diminishing the feelings but the only thing that could truly banish them was the sight of your destination, the heart of the Dreaming.

It had only been a couple of days but you had missed it keenly.

You taste the fresh, nurturing air as you gratefully inhale a breath. Welcome images of both pure realism and fantasy beam from your optic nerves to your brain. Faint sounds of ripples across the surface of the lake are a soothing soundtrack. Your tension from travelling melts away.

You journey across the bridge that leads to the front doors. Sure, you could have appeared inside the palace but you like the walk to soak in every detail of the approach and converse and check in with Dreamfolk that you see on your way.

You have timed your arrival to coincide with the end of Morpheus' audience hours in the throne room. You take the familiar route to the place now.

With a careful press of your palm, you noiselessly push one of the doors open and slip through the gap. While neither of you can see each other yet, you are aware that Morpheus knows you are here. He would have felt your presence as soon as you re-entered the Dreaming.

You leave your luggage to the side of the door frame and walk to the bottom of the curving staircase. The resplendent glass panels that serve as a backdrop eke gorgeous pastel shades over the marble that makes up the cathedral-like room.

As you look up to where Morpheus sits on his throne, a warm smile touches his rosy lips, one that you cannot help but return.

"My love," his voice oozes with the sweetness and warmth of honey and ginger.

"My Lord."

You ascend the steps, each footstep invoking a growing anticipation. To be close to Morpheus again is your only wish.

Once stood in front of him, he reaches for your hand and brings it to his mouth. His lips touch the ring on your left hand; a silver band set with a black opal. The iridescent speckles in the stone reflect colours of red, blue and green onto his pale skin.

He keeps his eyes locked with yours throughout, enhancing the intimacy.

You pull your hand away gently and rest it on the back of your neck as you are overwhelmed by the feelings blossoming in your chest.

Even after all these years, he is still able to make you giddy and delirious.

"Hi Morpheus," You say shyly.

"Hello, Y/N." He stands and puts his hands firmly on your waist. "Tell me how you are, how were your parents?"

You smile broadly as you mentally recall the weekend you had spent together. Afternoon walks and conversations that lasted long into the night. Wholesome food and non-stop tea drinking. Reminiscing and planning for the future. So much love and affection.

"It was lovely. They were on sparkling form, although they seemed a bit disappointed that you couldn't be there."

"Next time, I promise." He pulls you into an embrace. His clean, comforting scent is a balm.

You mumble your next words against his chest. "I think they might also be starting to notice that I've stopped ageing."

You are melancholy about this; their realisation means it will bring about change and you have grown quite accustomed to your life in its current guise.

"Do you regret your decision?" He whispers.

Pulling away, you cup his jaw with a hand. "Not at all. I promised forever in our wedding vows."

"And I promised to support you in times of difficulty.”

"It's okay. We always knew this day would come."

"We should decide what to tell them."

"I agree,” you lighten your tone. “But first, you must let me know how you have been."

Morpheus looks wistful. "I have missed you, My Queen, as I always do when we are apart."

"I missed you too. Especially at night."

You are referring to the necessary measure where you are shut off from the Dreaming when you spend a night in the waking world. It is something that you know saddens Morpheus, for it brings him great satisfaction to feel you enjoying dreams again after choosing to live predominantly in the Dreaming, particularly the dreams he makes especially for you.

"I thought about you a lot when I was alone," you confess in an afterthought.

Morpheus raises his eyebrows. "Did you think of anything in particular?"

"I think you can guess."

He chuckles with a playful smile. "I have an inkling but I would much prefer you tell me."

"I would much prefer to show you."

You push on his shoulders to get him to sit once more and then sink down onto your knees. Your long black coat, deliberately reminiscent of Morpheus’ own, pools about you.

“May I?” You ask as you trace an index finger around the circumference of the button on his trousers.

He nods and a little thrill electrifies your core. While it was not the first time you had done things in this room, you always find it exhilarating to be able to pleasure your King atop his throne, and even more so when you are the one taking charge of the situation.

You free his erection and steady it at the base with your hand. His tip is dripping with arousal; you lap at it with your tongue and he gasps.

His reaction makes you grin mischievously. You tease him with little licks and kisses until he is tense with need. He has never begged verbally yet you know that this state is the closest he will get to uttering the words and a cue that he is desperate.

The instinct to quell his torment is all-encompassing.

You open your lips and take him into your mouth. The groan he issues as you envelop him is guttural.

You take in as much as you can handle without bringing yourself discomfort and then look up at your husband. Lustful darkness glints in his eyes. You move.

Dragging upwards, you suck all the way to his swollen tip, swirl your tongue around and then dip back down. You repeat this at various speeds and pressures, and use your hands to provide extra sensation. Scandalous, wet noises and breathy panting fill your ears and turn you on.

You slow a little and peek up at Morpheus. His hands are gripping the arms of the throne, clearly showing the strain he is bearing in order to keep himself under control. You know that he wants to let his hips rise up. You tighten your lips and move faster to compensate. He begins to twitch.

“Y/N,” he calls.

You withdraw.

"I want you in my lap."

You stand, and as you do so the clothes covering your body dissolve into nothing. It is a feat that never fails to impress you.

Morpheus moves to sit further forward on the throne and you place yourself so your thighs are either side of his hips. His expectant expression and the feeling of skin on skin makes you quiver with delight.

You fix your attention on the enchanting, exquisite face that you adore, at the person you love so dearly and your heart stumbles. You sometimes wonder how the universe pulled this off however you are glad it managed to.

Morpheus draws your face to his and you kiss deeply, running your fingers through his wild, wispy locks. His own fingers massage your breasts and your nipples harden against his soft palms.

Without breaking the kiss, you position your entrance to hover over his cock. You pull back and look deep into Morpheus’ bottomless blue eyes.

"Do it," he says darkly, as his smouldering gaze consumes you.

You drop down with a controlled flex of your leg muscles.

The groan that rumbles in his chest is like the growl of a jaguar. Your own groan is higher in pitch but just as vehement.

You find a rhythm; a shallow yet sensual one that keeps you from knocking your knees or Morpheus' back into the upright of the seat.

You stare at each other with wonder. All that pent up longing seeps away, replaced by relief.

Your forehead falls to rest on his shoulder. From your new viewpoint, you have full sight of the place where your bodies are joined. You blink in surprise.

Literal constellations are swirling, dancing on your skin.

Shades of blue, purple and pink highlighted with twinkles of silver, they caress the insides of your thighs, hips. Everywhere that Morpheus’ skin is touching yours.

You have no idea whether he knows what he is doing.

You stop your rutting and raise your head.

"My love?" He questions with concern.

You look down again and he follows suit.

Morpheus sees the galaxies. His lips part in surprise.

He experimentally trails his fingers up your neck and across your jaw. You can’t see however you know that the same is happening because of his expression of fascination.

His hands are then everywhere. Brushing over your lips, eyelids, breasts, stomach, leaving stars in his wake. He's painting you with his very essence. Making you shine with the same radiance of the ceiling above you.

He then places a palm over your heart. “I love you, Y/N,” he intones delicately.

“I love you, Morpheus.”

You kiss again before you grip the back of the chair and lift yourself up a little. Morpheus' hands grasp your hips and making full use of the newly created space, he begins to pump up into you.

Burying your face against his neck, you gasp with every thrust as he hits a spot inside you that makes you feel like you are on the way to losing your composure.

You allow him to do it. You let yourself be swept by his currents, higher and higher into the boundless night sky above you.

He then makes a sound that has been echoing in your mind since the very first time you had sex. A deep, drawn out moan of pleasure that makes your walls start to constrict.

You relish the cooling flood of liquid that he spills inside you and the shuddering of his release triggers your own. Morpheus' long fingers then engulf your clit with sweet friction and your body arches with ecstasy.

You are suspended, floating in the vacuum of space. The stars that float around you, the same as the ones marking your skin.

Your lips are forming a single word. His name, but you can't hear the sound in your current orbit.

Morpheus' voice pulls you back through the atmosphere and down to somewhere more grounded.

He is murmuring praises that tickle the shell of your ear.

You are weak, unable to reply with anything but laboured breaths. Your legs shake so much that you are afraid you will fall if you try to get up. All you can do is cling to him like a koala on a eucalyptus tree.

Morpheus stands, still buried inside you. Your surroundings transform into your bed chamber.

You whimper when you feel your centre of balance shift as he goes to lay you down on the sheets. You don’t want to leave the safety his arms provide.

"Relax, my love," he murmurs.

He lets his cock slip out from your warmth. Pillows cushion the back of your head and cotton meets your bare skin. He clears his release away with a wave of his hand and drapes the covers over your exhausted frame. Suddenly, he is gone from your vision field.

"Morpheus?" You sound fearful.

"I am here, Y/N." He reassures.

He settles into the space beside you. You smile as you feel his hands stroking your face. Soothing you this way was something he excelled at.

“Is there anything I can get you?”

You shake your head, fighting to keep your eyes open. “No, thank you.”

He presses a kiss to your temple.

"Sleep, my love. I will watch over you until you wake."

It was such an inviting idea. The light in the room begins to dim, as if Morpheus has read your thoughts.

You give in to the lull, but before you are drawn under, you grab onto Morpheus’ hand.

"Don't leave me, please," you implore.

He lies down beside you and pulls you flush against his chest with his lithe arms.

His reply is a promise, spoken with his usual sibilance of storm clouds and sea breezes, a promise that would last for eternity.

"I wouldn't dream of it.”

-----------------

"So let me sleep where I live. With a murder of crows that live in the boughs of my brain. See me when I float like a dove. The skies above are lined with trees. I'm on my knees, I'm singing please. Come and take me away."

A/N II: A happy ending! Hope you enjoyed it. Would love to know your thoughts. Have a good evening ❤️

Also. Send help. I watched The Boat That Rocked and On The Road last week and I am now more in love with Tom than ever.

Taglist: @pinkcyclewitch @layla2-49 @shoidy-cat @silverhart93 @boofy1998 @dotieeee @ponysboy-sunsets @fangirlmary @littledollll @fatimakinney @jamiethenerdymonster @rosaren2498 @mr-sandman-bring-me-a-dream @madiebear @sandman-33 @sallysal9 @asiludida164 @elf-punk @grungeisntmything @sapphireonline @seninjakitey @emarich7

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cryoculus · 1 year

Text

— guard dog 05 ⟢

pairing: thoma x assassin!reader

summary: this isn't the first time you've attended a festival at amakane island. but why does it feel so different when you watch the fireworks with a green-eyed outlander?

word count: 5.3k words

notable characters: thoma, kamisato ayaka

tags: found family, enemies to lovers, slow burn, angst, eventual smut

warnings: allusions to past trauma

header art cr: ha__ze on twt

masterlist

“Have you been to a festival before, little one?”

Doctor Naoko’s voice was quiet amidst the rain prattling against the windowpane. You glanced at him curiously, sliding the minced lavender melons in a cooking pot with the blunt of a kitchen knife.

“No,” you told him, slightly miffed that he’s still calling you little one. “But Mother and I used to watch the fireworks from Narukami Island before…”

He nodded solemnly. “The Tatarigami.”

“The Tatarigami,” you repeated.

A thick silence filled the room as you watched a bright violet sheen bleed into the boiling water. You’d volunteered to make tonight’s batch of lavender melon soup, given that Doctor Naoko was preoccupied with something else. That being, a sturdy katana given by the village chief.

The samurai who owned it passed away earlier this week. He could no longer resist the effects of the curse, it seemed. But with no family to leave his katana behind, Doctor Naoko insisted that he keep it for now. While the prospect of a sword in the possession of a traveling doctor might’ve been odd, the village chief allowed it.

Now, there he was—diligently wiping the blade’s edge at the dinner table.

“Would you like to see the fireworks someday?”

You turned to look at him bizarrely, stirring the pot a few times before responding.

“And infect the people of Narukami in the process?” you laughed. “Doctor, you know what the rest of the locals say. If you’re born in Higi Village, you die in Higi Village. That’s even more true now.”

Doctor Naoko sighed, sheathing the sword before laying it atop the wooden table. There’s an…indecipherable look on his face as he processed your words.

“You’ve been taking the supplement, right?”

Your brow furrowed, gaze darting to the medicine cabinet near the entrance to his home. Though you couldn’t see it now, you knew there was a vial of that odd, pink liquid that the doctor asked you to test for him. He never told you what it was made from, and you didn’t ask.

Normally, one would be opposed to becoming a lab rat. But you’ve long accepted that one day, you’ll wake up with blood dripping from every orifice—the most definite sign that the Tatarigami had claimed yet another soul in its grasp. Your life had already lost its meaning the moment you’d been born here, and you owed it to Doctor Naoko to assist him with his research anyways.

“Yes,” you murmured. “The nosebleeds have stopped since you put me on the new medication. So have the migraines.”

He hummed. “And the nightmares?”

You bit your lip. He sighed.

“Well, progress is progress.” Doctor Naoko laughed. “If the new medicine proves to be effective, then we can stop giving that placebo to the villagers. We can finally give them a real cure. And maybe…we can take everyone out to Amakane Island to watch the fireworks. How’s that sound?”

Your eyes roved to the cooking pot, watching as bubbles broke through the rich violet surface. You knew that the worst lavender melon soup could cure was fatigue. Knew that Doctor Naoko had been deliberately lying to the villagers about its medicinal properties. But with how his research has been fairing, you decided to humor him. Just this once.

A kind smile inched past your face, hoping that one day, the doctor’s musings would become a reality.

“I’m looking forward to it.”

A few months after Doctor Naoko made the implicit promise, you’d fled Yashiori and witnessed your very first festival.

The experience had been underwhelming at best. As you weaved through the throng of visitors on Amakane Island, you couldn’t quite understand what was so exciting about festivals and fireworks and everything else the doctor had animatedly told you about. Not even the colorful string of lanterns and the jovial atmosphere could convince you.

But then again, your heart was heavy with the weight of grief. You came to Narukami Island, not to indulge in the festivities, but to find work.

Work fit for a scoundrel who let the doctor die right in front of her.

Before he passed, your biological father had been one of the guardian samurai of the village. Though he didn’t live long enough to teach you the art of the sword, you learned the ropes rather quickly once you’d taken Doctor Naoko’s katana and left. It was for that reason (among many others) that you chose to be a mercenary.

You found that building a name for yourself wasn’t as hard as you expected. Your methods weren’t confined to weapons alone. In this line of work, you had to learn about poisons, espionage, and of course, deceit.

There was a time when you’d considered using your…affliction to get jobs done. The Tatarigami curse didn’t play favorites. It spread indiscriminately to every sorry mortal it could get its hands on. If your target was around you long enough, you’re certain you could infect him in no time.

But the longer you took on all those odd jobs, you realized something.

You’d gone through the rest of Doctor Naoko’s supplements when you made the trip to the capital. Of course, they weren’t enough to last you for longer than you’d prefer. You only ever expected yourself to live for a few months more before the curse could fully take effect, but as you took one mission after the other, that’s when you noticed.

The Tatarigami couldn’t chain you to its grasp. Doctor Naoko’s supplements worked.

You were cured.

And that’s how, in spite of your blatant dislike for them, you started frequenting festivals more often. Whether they’re held in Inazuma City or Amakane Island, you’d be there—lingering in the shadows as you watched the colorful fireworks light up the sky.

After all, attending on his behalf was the least you could do for the doctor who’d saved your life even if his had been cut short.

“Milady! Miss Kira! You’re finally here!”

Your thoughts were abruptly derailed as a familiar voice hauled you back to the present. Just like he always did.

“Thoma,” Ayaka greeted her chief retainer with a smile. “I’m glad to see that everything seems to be in order.”

The blond laughed raucously. “Of course. I don’t want you to work any more than you already have. We all know those meetings at the Tenshukaku could be a bit much. Oh, you even brought Miss Kira along!”

You managed a tight-lipped smile. “Pleasure seeing you here, Master Thoma.”

“Miss Kira told me along the way that she’s yet to witness the fireworks show.” Lie. “And that she wanted to experience a festival firsthand.” Another lie. “But ah… As much as I’d love to show her around, I should look for Brother. Have you seen him?”

Thoma hummed in contemplation. “I could have sworn I saw the Commissioner discussing something with Mister Naganohara and Yoimiya at the top of the hill. Would you like me to escort you?”

Ayaka shook her head. “No. I have a more important task for you.”

“And that is?”

The princess smiled in a way that was just a tad bit mischievous before abruptly placing both of her hands on your shoulders.

“To show Miss Kira just how fun Amakane festivals can be, of course!”

Saying that you were appalled to be left alone with Thoma was an understatement.

To your utter disappointment, the chief retainer didn’t even express the slightest hint of refusal once Ayaka had issued the order. Thoma simply nodded along with that stupid, obedient smile of his before the rest of the guards led Ayaka further up the hill. You could only scowl as the princess left you in the dust—only to be tended to by your captor.

“Soooo…” he drawled, that familiar, knowing look settling once more on his face. “I take it that this isn’t your first time witnessing this at all?”

You rolled your eyes. “Just give me the tour so we can get it over with.”

“Hey, the only way you can enjoy a festival to the fullest is if you don’t rush things,” Thoma tutted. “I’m sure a brooding assassin such as yourself wouldn’t have the time for that sort of appreciation anyways.”

“Okay Mister Festival Connoisseur, can we get a move on now?”

The first stop was a takoyaki stall with a handful of visitors crowding the vicinity. The scent of fried squid and smoke filled your nostrils, and you squinted ahead just to catch a glimpse of the man filling orders up front. But before you could even ask Thoma how long the two of you had to fall in line, one of the owners was already calling out to him in welcome.

“Master Thoma, it’s you!” spoke a woman with graying hair. “You’re here to fulfill your promise to offer us your patronage, I take it?”

Thoma chuckled earnestly as he tugged you by the elbow. “Miss Reina, I had no such intention to leave you hanging! I was just waiting for my companion here to arrive is all.”

You eyed him bizarrely but Reina again spoke before you could even put a word in.

“Oho? Companion, you say,” The woman stared at you in a way that you knew was meant to tease. “So, what’ll it be tonight, Master Thoma?”

The chief retainer hummed. “How about…two Amakane specials?

Reina nodded as she scribbled the order before another one of the patrons blatantly shouted hers right next to your ear. The crowd was getting more and more congested and you instinctively leaned away just to grant yourself some more breathing room. But in the process, you accidentally pressed yourself closer to Thoma’s side.

Damn it!

“It's getting quite busy tonight,” Reina sighed apologetically. “How about the two of you look around for a while and I’ll deliver your food once it’s ready?”

You gulped. “That won’t be nece—”

“Sure,” Thoma interjected. “See you later, Miss Reina.”

Surely enough, the chief retainer took it upon himself to drag you to the next booth over without another word. Once you’d gotten away from the rest of the hungry visitors, you shot him a scowl.

“You were totally abusing your privilege,” you hissed, fisting his jacket. “Just because you’re a hotshot from the Kamisato clan, doesn’t mean you get to abuse the people’s kindness like that!”

Thoma shrugged. “It’s not abuse if the kindness is willingly offered in the first place, Miss Kira.”

“You—!”

“Master Thoma!”

Startled, you glanced at the man who addressed Thoma with the same enthusiasm as Rina from the street food stall. He stood right in front of an array of festival masks with varying designs. Fom tengu to oni to kitsune—he had them all.

“Sanden!” Thoma greeted in earnest. “Got any new designs we can get our hands on?”

The vendor, Sanden, nodded. “You’re just in time, actually. My daughter has been going on and on about these two fox spirits from a storybook Miss Yoimiya had given a month ago. Here, take a look! They’re a matching pair.”

He gently lifted two black kitsune masks off the display board—both adorned with metallic patterns that contrasted with their obsidian sheen. One was lined with golden accents, while the other, a glittering silver. Sanden gave the former to Thoma, and the latter to you.

“Interesting,” your companion doled out, studying the craftsmanship rather intently. “If you don’t mind me asking, what’s the story behind them?”

Sanden smiled. “Well, those two fox spirits actually represent the sun and the moon. The story goes like this: the sun spirit runs across the horizon for hours on end, in a futile attempt to chase the moon. And come nighttime, the moon spirit does the same in hopes of reaching the sun.”

“That seems a little too tragic for a children’s book, doesn’t it?” you asked dryly as you checked out the mask in your hands.

“Not at all, miss.” The vendor shook his head. “Because the two spirits long to be together, they gave birth to the cycles of night and day. Knowing that our realities are borne from the love the spirits have for one another is rather comforting in this age of chaos. Don’t you think so?”

“But that’s just a legend, right?”

Sanden shrugged, one eye dropping into a wink. “We can never really know, and that’s what makes it all the more enchanting.”

“Here.”

Blinking in confusion, you jolted slightly as Thoma plucked the silver-sheened mask from your grasp. But your expression softened when you realized he’d already adorned the golden one at the side of his head. He fastened yours in place, and you were too stunned to protest.

“Whatever tale they’re based off of, masks are a staple in festivals,” he murmured, smiling at his handiwork once he pulled away. Thoma then turned to Sanden. “How much for these two?”

The vendor shook his head. “I almost didn’t make it in time to set up shop, and you helped me sort everything out, Master Thoma. It’s on the house.”

“Master Thoma! Little miss! Special delivery!”

Just in time, a lively looking Reina carried two plates containing a vast assortment of street food. Egg rolls, dango, takoyaki, rice balls, sushi—they were all plated so neatly, you couldn’t believe your eyes. So that was the Amakane special.

“Just like old Sanden’s masks, your food is free of charge.” Reina winked before handing you your orders. “This is the least we could do for the person behind the festival.”

For the first time, you bore witness to Thoma with his face flushing at their words. Dear Archons. You didn’t know it would bring you such relief to know this man was actually capable of becoming embarrassed.

“You lot give me too much credit,” he sighed, nibbling on a stick of dango. “I’m only doing as I’m told, you know.”

“And we’re just thanking you for your hard work,” Sanden chuckled, patting him on the shoulder. “Well, go on! Find a comfortable spot to eat with your date. Miss Yoimiya’s fireworks show is about to start soon.”

You nearly choked. “I’m not his—”

“We’ll go ahead and do that then~”

Two times. This man just interrupted you two times today. You were sure to make him pay for it later, but for now, you were going to go along with his whims and eat. You’re starved.

In spite of how crowded the island has gotten, you and Thoma managed to secure a table near the venue’s edge. The indistinct noise and chatter from the visitors were still present, but this far off, you could at least consume your dinner(?) in peace.

“So how are you liking the Thoma Festival Experience so far?”

Swallowing a mouthful of onigiri, you blanched at him. “Did you just call this the Thoma Festival?”

He shrugged, poking holes into his takoyaki. “It’s just like everyone said. I was in charge of organizing the whole thing, so it’s only proper to call it as such.”

“...You’re despicable! And everyone gave you all this stuff for free, too.”

Thoma merely responded with an infuriating laugh, which you decided to tune out as you observed your surroundings.

You didn’t know if it was just you but…Amakane Island looked a bit more lively as opposed to the previous times you’d decided to drop by a festival. Despite the fact that spring was still a few months away, the cherry blossoms were in full bloom. Their petals wafted around gracefully, like they knew exactly how to set up the perfect atmosphere alongside the bright glow of the lanterns.

And then, there were the people.

Before your unfortunate ‘capture’ at the Kamisato estate, you used to avoid ordinary citizens like the plague. Even if the actual plague that had infected you a few years ago had long gone, you still felt…dirty. Unworthy to bask in their company for too long.

Hell, you killed people for a living. If all these visitors knew who you were and what you did, you were almost too certain they’d run you out of town with torches and pitchforks. That’s why you always preferred to work in the shadows.

It was easier that way.

“Hey, you feeling alright, Miss Kira? You look like you’re attending a funeral.”

Glancing up from your plateful of street food, you met Thoma’s viridian gaze. He was gazing at you curiously as he suckled on a dango stick, which made you scoff in disgust. But when a few sakura petals landed between his hair and his headband…

“What are you…?”

You leaned forward, bracing one hand on the wooden table as you brushed the petals away—caressing some tufts of his golden hair in the process. Thoma simply stared in stunned stupor as you took your seat again. But before you could even tease him for his sudden silence, your eyes landed on someone else.

It was Ayaka. Looking even more distressed than she did earlier today. She and the rest of her guards were hastily making their way down the hill, with the Commissioner, Ayato in tow.

“Milady!” Thoma called out, probably having followed your line of sight. “Anything wrong?”

Stopping in her tracks, Ayaka turned to Thoma with a tired smile. “Something just came up at the Tenshukaku again. Hold the fort while we’re gone?”

“...Alright. You can count on us.”

You shot him a look. “Us?”

“Thank you,” Ayaka sighed—the relief in her voice evident to a fault.

Before their retinue could make a swift exit though, you managed to meet Ayato’s gaze in the heat of it all. Those startling blue eyes, almost silver in the moonlight, were the same yet so different from Ayaka’s. In spite of having lived with him for about a month now, you still had a hard time telling apart his expressions.

You couldn’t tell what he’d been thinking at that moment, but it was clear that the Commissioner still didn’t trust you. Not one bit.

And it was awfully smart of him not to, really.

“Gods, I wish those two would catch a break soon.”

In front of you, Thoma had already finished his Amakane special and was resting his head against the palm of his hand—sighing almost wistfully. You couldn’t help but agree.

“Did you know that Aya—ah, milady collapsed on her way to her room earlier?” you asked.

Obviously, Thoma did not know about this.

“What?” he spoke sharply. “You didn’t do anything underhanded, did you?”

You crossed your arms. “She’s obviously well enough to stress about the Tenshukaku meetings again, isn’t she? I’m a criminal but I still have some tact.”

Just as quickly as it came, the alarm on his face melted back into a warm smile. Warm enough to make you feel uncomfortable.

“It’s just as I suspected. I successfully house-trained Inazuma City’s most notorious assassin.”

You flung a ball of takoyaki at his face.

The rest of the night went by in a flash.

Just like with everything else he does, Thoma had a knack for festival games. This one booth held contests for which person could successfully catch the most goldfish in under one minute. Which was no easy feat, given that the nets were made out of flimsy parchment paper instead of, well, actual nets.

You were already struggling with catching one goldfish, yet Thoma managed to fling at least ten into the damn basket.

“That’s Master Thoma for you,” hollered the game master, handing Thoma the prize for his seemingly unbeatable record: a handmade bake-danuki plush. “You can try your luck next time, newbie!”

You grumbled something about rigged festival games and biased judgement.

“Aww, no need to look so down in the dumps,” Thoma chuckled as the two of you strolled up the path—manipulating the bake-danuki’s little plush arms in an attempt to cheer you up. “Mister Danuki will be sad if you continue sulking.”

“Tell Mister Danuki to mind his own business,” you growled.

The chief retainer gasped, placing Mister Danuki’s hand above its chest in mock offense. “That’s a bit impolite even for you, Miss Kira… Oh?”

Glancing at whatever caught Thoma’s attention this time, you feast your eyes upon a lone wooden board with colorful charms strung together on display. The chief retainer slowly made his way closer, and in spite of yourself, you followed suit.

For a moment, he was quiet—green eyes scanning the dreams and wishes the visitors wished to take up to the gods. You didn’t quite understand the prospect of using these charms, in all honesty. From all the news of the Vision Hunt going around, you weren’t sure if the Raiden Shogun was in the mood to grant anyone’s wishes.

Yet Thoma was staring at them like they were the most important things in the world.

“Did you know that milady has never been to a festival?”

You were visibly confused. “What? She was just here a moment ago.”

The smile that tugged on his lips had a hint of sadness in them—an emotion that you never would have associated with Thoma until now. His gloved hand inspected the charms with great care, like he was afraid they would break.

“Well, she’s always in attendance, that’s true. It’s expected of her as the Lady of the Kamisato house,” Thoma explained. “But in spite of all the talk of business, the occasional fan dances she beholds to the people of Inazuma… She’s never been to a festival, the way the two of us have.”

You contemplated his words for a moment, realizing that the moment you had arrived, Ayaka immediately thought about discussing business with her brother instead of enjoying herself.

“Do you…” you began, clearing your throat uneasily, “want to make a wish, then? With a charm?”

Thoma turned to you with a puzzled look, blinking once, twice, before bursting out laughing.

“I didn’t take you to be the type to believe in such superstition, Miss Kira,” he snorted.

Your cheeks heated up. “I-I do not! It just seems to me like you’re the one who’s into this sort of thing… I’m not always an asshole, you know?”

His laughter stops—expression morphing into something calmer. More sincere. Thoma raised a hand and you were instinctively on alert for any tricks he might pull, but all the chief retainer did was brush away the flower petals that got caught in your hair. The same way you did with him earlier tonight.

“I know.”

You didn’t know where you should look. For some reason, his emerald eyes smoldered too much for comfort, and you hadn’t the slightest clue what to reply. But it’s as if the gods had heard your internal cry for help when Thoma finally snapped out of it.

The endearing look in his gaze vanished in a flash, replaced by something similar to panic.

“Move. Quick.”

He seized your hand in his, pulling you along as he led you to the shore. You were about to protest his sudden gesture, but when you glanced behind you, you spotted a couple of uniformed soldiers emerging from the entrance.

Soldiers from the Tenryou Commission.

“You know you don’t have to act like I’m a rebel from Sangonomiya when we’re alone, right?” you huffed, minding your step as Thoma led you further down. “I’ve been pretty…chill with the Tenryou Commission for the past few years.”

Thoma laughed breathlessly as the two of you made it underneath the jutting cliff of Amakane Island—far from the festival, far from the noise.

“It’s better to be safe than sorry,” he reminded, taking a seat on a mossy patch of rock. You sat down next to him with your heart beating erratically in your ribcage.

He still hadn’t let go of your hand.

“And besides, the fireworks show is about to start.”

“The wha—”

The sound of ballistas going off above you nearly scared you out of your wits, until you realized that the source of the noise weren’t ballistas at all. Fireworks of all shapes and colors shot up to the sky at breakneck speed before blooming beautifully into the night. You tilted your head further for a better view—mouth hanging loose as you marveled at the display before you.

That was strange. This wasn’t the first time you’ve watched the fireworks, yet…

Even if the show was still underway, you managed to peel your eyes from the sight. Instead, you affixed your stare on where your hand was pressed against Thoma’s on the cold, mossy rock. You dared to rake your eyes upward.

Unlike you, Thoma had been fully engrossed with the fireworks. A childlike grin played on his lips as the colors flashed before his green, green eyes. But in spite of the bright hues that reflected on his face every few seconds, you couldn’t help but train your gaze on the plump swell of his lips instead.

There it was again. The odd stutter in your heart.

Though the fireworks show lasted for no longer than five minutes, it felt like those few moments had been unspooled from a seemingly endless eternity. You knew better than to cling to a memory as insignificant as this one but…

The warmth of Thoma’s fingers on top of yours. His silly bake-danuki plush sitting comfortably on his lap. The golden accents of his kitsune mask glittering in the night. And the smile he flashed you when he finally caught you staring—

You burned it all in the back of your head, hoping that even if the fireworks lasted mere seconds, the time you spent with him would stretch across lifetimes.

“Yoimiya outdid herself again this time.” He sighed once the show had come to an end, rising back to his feet as he untangled his fingers from yours. You couldn’t help the prickle of disappointment in your chest. “Well, what do you think?”

You ignored his question. “Thoma, why are you so nice to me?”

His smile fell. You pressed on.

“I take it that you’re nice to anyone and everyone you meet but… I’m not just some random girl from the city you decided to take here on a whim,” you elaborated, feeling your throat close up with every word. “I’m a murderer. Someone that’s been hired to kill Lady Ayaka of the Kamisato clan. Yet you’re…doing all this? What’s the point?”

With one hand holding Mister Danuki, Thoma reached up to touch his pendant with the other. It seemed like an unconscious action, but you elected not to ask.

“I’m sure you know I’m not from around these parts, yeah?” he remarked. “I’m an outlander. Born and raised somewhere else, until I found my sorry ass washed up on the shores of Ritou.”

You arched an eyebrow. “I figured as much.”

Thoma chuckled. “That makes things easier to explain then.”

“Even before the Sakoku Decree, the Kanjou Commission didn’t take kindly to foreigners. I had nothing but the clothes on my back and the dog tags I’m wearing now. To survive, I had to steal just so I could eat. In short, I was a criminal for quite a while, too.”

“How does this correlate to you taking it easy on an assassin?” you wondered.

“I’m getting there, hold on.” The blond laughed, sitting next to you once again. “I lived like that for a few weeks but then…milady’s parents found me. Her mother is very kind. Even if I didn’t know how to speak the language, she didn’t send me to jail when she caught me nabbing her purse. Next thing I knew, I’d been adopted into the family.”

“Long story short, I know what it feels like to be alone. That kind of loneliness drives us to do all sorts of unimaginable things,” he murmured quietly. “But that doesn’t have to be the end of the line. The late Lady Kamisato showed me as much. And even if Lord Ayato practically threatened to have me executed if I ended up being wrong about you, I still insisted.”

You were silent for about three heartbeats before—

“You’re a fucking idiot.”

The sand began to trickle into your sandals with how heavy your strides fell across the ground. Thoma was hot on your heels as you ditched him, but it wasn’t like you’d been walking fast enough to evade him.

You were just…pissed. Beyond belief.

You reminded him of himself because he used to be a fugitive, too? That’s rich. As if someone loved by the people of Inazuma knew a fraction of what you went through. As if a person who never had to taint their hands with blood could understand.

“Hey!” Thoma called out, seizing your wrist in an iron-tight grip. “You’re still prohibited from wandering around unsupervised, Miss Kira.”

“I’m still going to do it, you know.”

You’d uttered the words so quietly, he barely caught what you were saying. But the chief retainer wasn’t an idiot. He knew what you’d been pertaining to right away.

“Why?”

“Because I was paid to do it,” you said, which wasn’t exactly true. You will be paid was the more accurate wording, but you needed to stand your ground right now.

Thoma nodded slowly. “Okay, but why?”

“What are you getting at?”

“I mean, why would you do that to milady, who hasn’t given you a single reason for you to kill her?” he wondered, sounding genuinely curious. “I’d understand if she was some ruthless tyrant that’s out to seize all the Visions in Inazuma, but we both know that’s far from the case.”

You stared at him incredulously. “...Because that’s what I was paid to do?”

“Hm? So if I gave you six-hundred mora right now to do a little dance for me, you’d do it?”

“Fuck you.”

In spite of it all, Thoma laughed. Laughed right in your face as he used Mister Danuki to wipe the tears from his eyes.

“Archons, you have such an unreasonably foul mouth, you know that?” the chief retainer pointed out with a grin. “You’re angry because you think I’m taking pity on you. Is that it?”

You tried to pull your arm free, but he refused to budge. “That’s none of your business.”

“Oh, but it is,” Thoma insisted, pulling you closer until your faces were mere inches away. “As my personal captive, it’s exactly my business to gauge your emotional constitution. I can’t exactly change your mind about taking milady’s life if I’m riling you up every other minute, yeah?”

“But isn’t that what you’re doing right now?” you bit back, ignoring the way his breath fanned your face. “That’s what you’ve been doing since you held me prisoner at the estate, you dumb guard dog.”

He chuckled breathily and you felt the reverberations in what little distance sat between you. This close, you could see just how much more green his eyes could get—entrapping you in a swirl of jade and viridian, until you’ve completely forgotten what you’d been arguing about in the first place.

You most certainly didn’t miss it when those eyes of his flickered to your lips.

“That, I have…” he admitted quietly. “You can even say I’ve taken quite the liking to you, dear Miss Kira.”

Before you could even hope to ask him to clarify, Thoma was already peeling himself away—taking both the warmth of his touch and the smolder in his eyes. The chief retainer was on his merry way, walking back to the festival without a stutter to his step. You replayed his words over and over in a span of ten seconds before:

“What do you mean by that?”

He stopped in his tracks, loose ponytail swaying as he abruptly turned around to meet your eyes. Thoma was silent for only a moment before giving you his reply.

“It means what you want it to mean.” He smiled. “Come on. I’m sure the folks from the Tenryou Commission have long left. We still have a festival to clean up after.”

“We?”

Thoma gave no further response. Your eye twitched.

But you found yourself trailing after him anyway.

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#genshin impact #genshin #genshin fanfic #genshin smut #genshin fanfiction #genshin x reader #thoma smut #thoma fanfic #thoma x reader #genshin scenarios #genshin headcanons #genshin thoma #cryoculus #guard dog

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hiimblurry · 2 years

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slow-motion suicide | eddie munson oneshot fanfiction

synopsis: When Eddie disappears after Chrissy's death, you and your friends go on a mission to find him. Since you're the closest to him, you're the one to go and talk to him, to calm him down. What your friends don't know is that your relationship with Eddie is... complicated.

word count: 5.1k

pairing: Eddie Munson x female reader

warnings: 18+ (MINORS DNI) smut, oral sex (both female and male receiving), penetrative sex, unprotected sex, BDSM, choking, mention of death, suicide, violence

disclaimer: please keep in mind English is not my first language, feel free to point out any mistakes!

spoilers: this takes place at the end of s04e02 vol1, so spoilers for the first two episodes of season 4!

inspo: this fic is inspired by the song "Julien" by Placebo, listen along as you read to enhance the experience;)

„I got him!”

You were all staring at the screen over Robin’s shoulder, watching her search through the database, your breaths heavy with anticipation.

“That must be it. Riffer Rick’s”, she said, pointing at the screen that now showed an address.

“He must be there!” Dustin jumped, grabbing his backpack.

“Whoa, whoa, hold your horses, Henderson.” Steve grabbed his arm, stopping him from jumping over the counter. “We can’t just go there.”

“And why the hell not?” Dustin asked, already annoyed with Steve.

“If he’s actually there, he’s, let me remind you, hiding. He ran for his life. He must be totally freaked out and five people just showing up, three of whom he doesn’t really know, might, I don’t know, freak him out even more?”

Dustin didn’t look happy, but by looking at his eyes you could tell he knew Steve was right.

“What do we do then?”, you asked.

“I say we all go, but only one of us actually goes to see him. The rest of us wait outside so that this one person can calm him down and we only all go when he’s ready”, Robin said. “And, given that, as Steve noticed, Eddie barely knows me, him or Max, it’s either Dustin or Julien who has to… deal with him.”

You froze, hearing your name. You started to breathe faster, hoping none of them notice your nervousness.

“I suppose he trusts you more. You know him way longer.” Dustin’s words were exactly what you were afraid to hear. You looked at him, hope in his eyes. You knew he cared for Eddie. So much.

And it wasn’t like you didn’t care for him too. Of course you did. You wouldn’t be here if you didn’t. You were worried, worried sick about him. It was just that… you didn’t know how to tell them that the thing about him trusting you might not be true anymore.

“Do you think you can do that? Talk him down a bit?” Max asked and you forced an encouraging smile.

“I sure hope I can,” you said, trying not to let your voice shake.

“Are you guys close?” Steve asked in a weird tone.

“Why, Harrington, you jealous?” Dustin laughed.

“Oh, shut up”, Steve rolled his eyes. “Asking for… the mission’s sake.”

Dustin mumbled something that sounded like a very convinced ‘sure’.

“I… I suppose you could say that”, you answered Steve’s question.

Why did you feel the need to lie to them?

You all got in Steve’s car. The whole ride you just stared out the window, trying to calm your nerves. It made you feel a weird sense of guilt, to be nervous now. Eddie was being accused of murder, he most likely witnessed something from the Upside Down kill Chrissy. Who knows what horror has played out right in front of his eyes? He was hiding, running from the cops, from the jocks trying to get him, hell, maybe from whatever creature got Chrissy. He must be scared for his life. Hell, you didn’t even know if he was fine. What if he was hurt? What if, while you were taking forever to figure out where he was, he was out there, bleeding out? Or worse, what if he was already…

No. He was fine. He must have been. Your heart ached, thinking about how, if he… if he was really gone, the things you said to him last time you saw him would be the words he took with him to his grave.

You were stupid. So, so fucking stupid. You promised yourself so long ago you wouldn’t be saying things you didn’t mean. Yet you did.

Pushing him away felt like the right thing to do. You thought it was better for both of you if you never saw each other again. That it would make things easier, so much easier. So that’s what you told him. Now, that the reaper was around the corner again, all of this felt so irrelevant. Who the fuck cared what other people thought, who the fuck cared about school, about obligations, about all the things that made you think you were better off alone?

All you could count on was that he would still want to listen. And that he was still there to listen.

Steve parked the car and you saw a house that looked as if it was abandoned. No lights were lit, but you knew it didn’t mean he wasn’t there. Of course he wouldn’t have the lights on. He wasn’t stupid.

“Julien, you ready?” Dustin’s voice barely reached you, your heavy heartbeat muffling your ears. “Jules?”

“Yes, sorry”, you snapped out of it, grabbing your bag.

“Do you have your transmitter?”

You just waved with the device before putting it in your bag.

“Good. You go there, talk to him, and when he’s ready, you call for us, yes? We’ll discuss. We… we’ll figure it all out”, Robin reviewed the plan. It was hardly a plan, really. But a starting point, definitely. And that was better than nothing.

You left the car, catching the last encouraging looks from the group. It got dark already, the air crisp, the wind making you regret not wearing something warmer. You tucked down your skirt and held the sleeves of your sweater, making your way towards the house.

If this whole town was forgotten by God, he must have wanted to forget this place with some special passion. The stairs to the front porch creaked as you made your way up them, using your flashlight to see where you were going. You looked into the house, dirty windows making your light barely pass inside.

“Eddie?” you said, probably not loud enough, knocking lightly on the glass. You knew it would have to be a miracle for him to hear that, but your guts were squeezing at the thought of making a louder sound.

You knocked a couple times more, hoping that somehow he’d react to that. You made your way around the house, looking through and knocking on every window of the building. Nothing.

You were about to get your shit together and just storm into the house when you noticed a small shack. The house was near the lake so Rick must have kept a boat and probably some fishing equipment there. Definitely a less obvious choice for a hideout than the house near the road.

“I don’t think he’s in the house, but there’s a shack down near the lake, I’m gonna check it”, you said through the transmitter.

“Okay. Be careful.” You heard Steve’s voice.

“Always am”, you said melodically before putting the device back in your bag.

The moist ground made squelching noises as you walked down to the shack. There were no windows to check. You just had to get inside.

The doors creaked and the sound felt incredibly loud in the eerie silence of the night. You looked around the shack, scanning it with your flashlight. It did, indeed, hold the fishing equipment: rods, oars, nets, life jackets. In the middle, there was a boat, covered with a tarp.

“Eddie?”, you tried again, a bit louder, now that you were in a closed space. Your hands were shaking as you walked around the place, placing your steps carefully on the screeching wooden floor. “Eddie, please—“

You couldn’t finish. All of the sudden you heard the tarp rustle and before you knew it, the flashlight fell out of your hand and you were being pushed onto the wall. A strong body pinned you to the wooden surface and you felt something cold and sharp on your neck. A hand squeezed your arm, keeping you in place.

“Eddie, Eddie, please, it’s me, it’s Jules”, you said, panic barely letting the words come out of your mouth, the sharp object scratching your neck as you spoke.

Eddie was staring at you with no recognition, pure fear in his eyes, his left hand on your arm, his right hand holding what you now realised was a broken glass bottle. He was breathing heavily, his nostrils wide as he scanned your face.

“Julien?” Your name fell out of his mouth, his brow furrowed.

“Yes, it’s me, it’s Julien. I’m here to help you, Eddie, please, I’m not going to hurt you. Please, put the bottle down.”

He took a few more seconds before he dropped the bottle. You squeezed your eyes as the glass shattered on the floor, the sudden noise triggering the panic that still hasn’t let go of you. His grip on your arm loosened as he took a step away, only now letting you take a deep breath. You watched as he leaned his back on the wall, sliding down to sit on the floor. You kneeled next to him carefully as he stared into the void in front of him.

“What are you doing here?” he asked, his voice weak.

“I had to find you. I heard about everything and I was worrying sick about you.”

“How did you know I was here?” He finally forced his head up to look at you.

“I didn’t. I did some… research. This seemed like the most probable hideout for you. I had some help”, you answered. He nodded lightly. You were glad he didn’t ask more questions about that now.

“I didn’t do it”, he said all of the sudden.

“What?”

“I didn’t do it. I didn’t… kill… her. I didn’t kill Chrissy”, he said as if it ached him to just say those words out loud.

“Of course you didn’t”, you exhaled.

“And why are you so quick to believe me?”, he snapped. “You heard the fucking news. She was found in my house, there was no one else there, and me? I ran like a fucking coward! I basically fucking confessed!” He threw another bottle you didn’t realise he was holding across the room, the shattering sound making you jump again.

“Eddie, please calm down. I believe you, because I know you.”

“Do you now?”, he smirked, a sad laugh escaping his lips. “Why do I have a mere memory of you saying that you wish you didn’t?”

You closed your eyes, taking a deep breath. You knew this was a bad idea. You should have told Dustin to come. Whatever distance the two of them had would be way easier to get over with than… this.

“Eddie, now’s not the time…”

“Oh, no, I think this is a perfect time for that”, he said, standing up. You slowly stood up too, watching him now walk around the shack nervously. “Because you know what? All this shit going on, literal people dying in front of my eyes, some weird ass satanic shit happening to a poor girl that just needed a distraction, shit that would be fucking wild in DnD, let alone in real life!” His voice was shaking as he started to scream the words out, kicking whatever was in his way. “People thinking not only that I killed her, but that I’m a fucking spawn of Satan of sorts, I mean, hell, who the fuck knows, maybe I am fucking possessed?” A wild, fake smile grew on his face, madness in his eyes. “That groomed fucking boyfriend of Chrissy’s and his disgusting crew now being on a fucking hunt for me probably, and my uncle, my poor uncle being told I did it, and I can’t even fucking go back and talk to him.” His voice went softer. “All of this, Julien, all this fucked up shit happening and yet what I think about here, being alone in this nasty, dark place, hiding for my life, is you.”

He finally stopped walking around nervously and just stood there, looking at you as your heart froze. Tears formed in your eyes as you noticed the pain written all over his face.

“Eddie, I—“

“No, Julien, I don’t want to fucking hear any of this again. Just go, okay? I can manage. I’ll be fine. I’ll… run. That’s what I do now. Maybe we do have something in common after all”, he said with a bitter smile.

“I didn’t mean any of it”, you said, putting all the power you had left into your voice.

“What?”

“I didn’t mean a word of what I said to you that day. I don’t think we’re better off alone. I don’t think we shouldn’t see each other. I don’t think we’re bad for each other. I— I don’t”, you spit the words out before anything could stop you from saying them.

Eddie furrowed his brow, confusion in his eyes as he just stared at you, lightly nodding his head.

“Why would you say that now?”, his voice cracked. “You really think you can just, what, manipulate me to trust you again? What is this, Julien, you have some fucked up case of saviour complex or what? I told you, I’ll be fine, you can stop feeding me lies…”

“These are not lies, Eddie”, you interrupted him. “I thought it would be easier this way, because I got scared, because I cared for you so fucking much that it started to hurt, because I was convinced it could never work and I just couldn’t bear the thought of us being friends anymore, because I was fucking in love with you!”

You own words shocked you and you went silent as the echo of you confession filled the room with indescribable tension.

“You’re going to be the death of me”, he whispered, making his way slowly towards you. “I was dying by your side every day, loving you from the distance, convinced you’d never want more, only for you to prove it to me, prove that you want nothing to do with me.”

Your breath stopped.

“Loving me?”

“Yes, Julien, fuck, yes, loving you. But I could never say anything. I was just deteriorating, watching you distance yourself from me. You’re my doom, only I still stayed, I chose to love you still, so it’s my fault, really… You’re not killing me, Julien, you’re… you’re my slow-motion suicide.”

He was only a step away from you now and you could see fire burning in his deep, brown eyes, his jaw clenched and nostrils moving fast to the rhythm of his breath.

“Why… why wouldn’t you say anything?” you just whispered.

“Why wouldn’t you?”

Your breaths were the only thing disturbing the silence now.

“I guess we’re both just fucking cowards” you let out a sad laugh.

He looked you deep in the eye, as if thinking deeply about something, a glimpse of hope on his face before he said:

“Well, in that case, I’m done being one.”

Before you could catch the meaning of his words his lips crashed with yours. Only the initial shock prevented you from kissing him back immediately, but as soon as you understood what happened, you returned the kiss, both of you holding onto each other for your dear lives, as if it was the only thing in the world right now, just the two of you, finally doing what you both wanted for God only knows how long.

His kiss had you out of breath, but none of you dared to let go for a second. He held your cheek, as if afraid you’d want to back away. Your hand travelled up to his head, your fingers tangling in his hair as his free hand explored your body down, brushing your waist, going down to your ass, his thumb going under the material of your skirt. His touch, the slight brush of cold from his rings made you shiver.

“This is not how I imagined it would go”, he breathed out.

“What do you mean?”

“I never imagined us fucking in a nasty old shack”, he said and you could feel his smile against your cheek as he now proceeded to kiss your face, your chin, going down to your neck.

“That implies you did imagine us fucking”, you laughed.

“Hell yeah I did”, he grinned.

“What did you imagine then, if not the shack?” You forced yourself to speak properly as his kisses reached your collarbones. You looked down, the sight of him kissing you, praising your body, with your hand still in his hair, making the tension build in your abdomen.

“I imagined riding you on my bed, making you scream for the whole park to hear… I imagined you spread on the table in Hellfire Club, completely at my mercy, like an offering ready for a ritual… I imagined us fucking in an empty classroom while we skip classes, you bent over the teacher’s desk” he enumerated, putting the images in your head. “I imagined eating your pussy at the back of my van, then you sucking me off, then you laying down, letting me cum inside you”, he kept going, breathing heavily, each confession coming from in between the kisses.

He looked up at you, as if suddenly snapping out of a trance. “I’m a fucking creep, huh?”

You just smirked.

“I imagined you tying me to my bed, gagging me with that sweet little bandana of yours so that my parents don’t hear us as you fuck me senseless, I imagined your hand on my throat. I always imagine your tongue and fingers on my clit as I touch myself”, you said, returning the favour, kissing down his chin.

“You’re a little freak too, aren’t you, Jules?” he grinned before taking off your sweater with one, smooth move, smiling as it revealed nothing under it.

“They’re gonna have to hunt us both down”, you said, getting rid of his jacket, following it with his shirt. “Because I ain’t ever leaving your side again.”

As if to prove this confession, you kneeled down, carefully, your last remaining piece of reason making you make sure you don’t kneel on any of the shattered glass. He looked down at you, his hand now in your hair as you undid his belt, taking his pants down to his ankles, quickly making his boxers follow. His cock was now right in front of your face, hard and ready, making a little smile appear at the corner of your mouth.

Eddie put his hand on the wall to steady himself as the mere sight of you kneeling down for him made his legs weak. He swung his head back as you started teasing him, your tongue touching his tip ever-so-slightly.

“Fuck, Julien—“

“So impatient already”, you smirked, intentionally making the vibration of you voice tease him even more.

“I’ve waited months for this, god damn it, don’t you call me im—“

He didn’t finish as you put his dick in your mouth, words escaping him in a breathy moan. You started to slowly work him up and down, one of your hands joining by his base, the other squeezing his thigh. His grip on your hair tightened as your moves became faster.

You looked up to see him with his head still back, his hand desperately trying to hold on to something, scratching the wall next to you. He let out another moan as your hand, previously exploring his thighs, now slightly squeezed his balls. His sweet sounds made you need to rub your thighs together, the pressure becoming too much to hold in.

As if he couldn’t fight it anymore, he started to move his hips to the rhythm you imposed, making his dick hit the back of your throat. You gagged as he went faster, his hand in your hair speeding your moves too.

“Fuck, Julien, you’re sucking me so good, way better than I could ever imagine…”, he gasped. “But I— I don’t want it to be that simple”, he breathed out. “I wanna come inside you.”

He let go of your head and you let his cock slide out of your mouth. You stood up and he brushed your face with his hand, smearing the mixture of spit and pre-cum all over it. He then licked your neck, up to your chin, collecting some more liquid with his tongue.

He kicked his pants off of his ankles before he pushed you back, leaning you against a wooden table in the corner. He brushed all the stuff laying on it with his hand, making the clutter hit the floor. The sound of breaking glass filled the room again.

“I would fuck you on the floor, but hell, it’s way too nasty, even for freaks like us”, he laughed before lifting you by your hips, sitting you down on the now objectively clean surface.

“The table will do just fine”, you responded, grinning.

He lifted your skirt, teasing your pussy through the thin material of your panties.

“So wet for me”, he whispered against your skin as his lips made their way to kiss your chest, nagging at each of your nipples, slightly biting and pulling as his fingers massaged you, pushing the material more and more to the side. Finally, both his hands slid your panties down before he held your thighs, squeezing them, the rings probably leaving scratchy marks on your sensitive skin. You spread your legs as he lined his dick with your entrance, teasing you by brushing it up and down.

“For fuck’s sake, Eddie—“

“Well, look who’s impatient now”, he grinned before pushing himself into you. The feeling of him inside you made a moan escape your mouth as your eyes travelled up. He, too, made sweet noises as he started to impose a pace. Your legs wrapped above his ass as you desperately wanted to feel him closer, feel him more. Your hand went to grab the back of his head again, loving the feel of his locks as your hips thrusted harder, making the two of you work in perfect rhythm. You both kept going, the wood of the table squelching under you, the noise accompanying your moans and whimpers.

Eddie’s hand travelled up your body, cupping your breast, then higher, to your throat. You breathed in sharply as it tightened around your neck. He pushed you down, making you now lay on the table, not stopping his thrusts. His hand, squeezing your throat, pinned you down, making the sensations cloud your mind.

“Say you’re sorry”, he said suddenly, his voice definite.

“Wh-what?” you mouthed more than said, his hand barely letting any air into your throat.

“Say you’re sorry for running away from me”, he clarified. “Say you’ll never do that again. Say you’re mine.”

His thrusts became harder and his hand kept squeezing your throat, the intense emotions taking over him. There was anger in his eyes, anger, desperation and lust as he waited for you to respond, his face making you believe he was ready to punish you if you didn’t obey.

“I— I’m so— sorry”, you said, your voice weak, barely making any noise as you struggled through the tight grip he had on your neck, his rings burying deep into your skin. “I— I’ll never— I’m yours, only— only yours.”

He threw his head back, as if thriving in your confession. His moves were so fast and deep that for a split second you thought that maybe a demon of sorts did, in fact, possess him. But, shit, if the devil was this fucking good, you’d gladly burn in hell.

“Ah, fuck, I can’t—”, he whimpered, his grip on your neck now loosened, but his hand still there.

“Come on, fill me up”, you groaned. He didn’t have to hear it twice. Your voice his last straw, he came to his release, his cum exploding inside you. The warm feeling drove you closer to the edge.

Taking just a second to catch a breath, he slid out of you, leaving you dripping with his cum from in between your legs, your pussy desperately wanting to tighten around something.

“I quite liked one of those little fantasies of yours, you know”, he said, suddenly making his way back to where his pants were. Your body trembled when he reached to a pocket of the jeans and picked up his bandana. “What do you say we test it out?”

You licked your lips, the thought of him doing what you imagined him do so many times making you shake with excitement.

“Use your words, princess. As long as you still can.”

“Yes, please”, you managed to say, your voice shaking.

“Good girl”, he grinned as he approached you, folding the bandana into a flat strip. “Open up”, he ordered and you obediently opened your mouth. He brushed your lips with his thumb before he put the material in your mouth, tying it at the back of your head tightly. You struggled to swallow as he made sure the gag sits well. “Very well”, he smiled, looking at you as if you were a piece of art he just finished creating. “I’m gonna make you regret you can’t beg.”

Before you could digest his words, he pushed you back down so that you were laying on the table again, your legs spread before him. You bit down on the material as he started to kiss his way down your body. Your hand went to grab his head, wishing to guide him exactly where you needed him.

“Ah, nope”, he let out a dry laugh, grabbing your wrist. He took the second one too and placed your hands above your head. “You keep them there or I stop. Understood?”

You nodded, grabbing the edge of the table.

“Words, princess”, he gave you a vicious smile.

“Understood”, you tried saying, the bandana muffling your voice almost entirely.

“That’ll do”, he said, your struggling voice clearly working miracles on him.

He continued down, his kisses reaching your thighs, his lips sucking your skin, surely leaving bruised marks behind. Your breath was heavy as you fought your urge to touch him, even more so when his fingers slid across your folds. His two fingers teased your entrance before sliding inside, making another muffled noise fill the room. His lips now went to your clit, his tongue licking and massaging your most sensitive part, sucking on it as his fingers worked you fast from the inside. You were practically screaming into the black material when he added the third finger, his hand and mouth working you perfectly. You whimpered when he rested his free hand on your lower stomach, pressing slightly.

“What is it? You wanna cum?”, he asked teasingly.

“Yes, please—”, you tried saying, but what came out was a desperate cry.

“Oh, I’m sure you can hold it a little longer”, a devilish smile grew on his face as he went back to working you with his tongue. Your body arched as tears started to fall down your face, the sensation too much to hold in. “Just a little longer.”

A primal cry escaped your mouth, the bandana now soaked with your spit as you held the edges of the table, your whole body trembling.

“Please, Eddie, fuck—”, you tried saying, miserable noises coming out of you.

“Very well. Cum on me, you little slut”, he said, burying his face in your folds again. Your pussy tightened around his fingers once more as you finished. He licked you, gathering your cum with his tongue as he took his fingers out of you, straightening up.

“Such a good, good girl”, he praised as he leaned over you, kissing your chest, his face wet with your cum. “You can now touch me.”

Your hands reached for him desperately, cupping his face as you rose to sit. Eddie’s skilled hands untied the bandana, taking it out of your mouth. As soon as it was out, you leaned in for a kiss.

It was now soft, long and passionate. As if you both wanted to seal this, make it last, make it real.

“I did mean it now. With my whole heart”, you whispered.

“Mean what?”

“That I’m yours.”

A soft smile grew on his lips.

“I’m not letting you do it alone, Munson. I won’t let you go down.”

He brought you in for a hug.

“The two of us against the world it is”, he said.

The two of you. Yes. Wait, no. It’s not just the two of you!

“Fuck!”, you exclaimed.

“What?”, he asked, half amused, half shocked as you jumped out of the table and started to nervously pick up your clothes.

“Get dressed”, you breathed out.

“No need for modesty now, love, we just—”

“Remember when I told you I had some… help?”, you asked and he nodded. “Well, that help came here with me. They’re waiting in the car for me to… talk to you and… calm you down.”

“Well, that you certainly did”, he smirked.

“They’ll be worried sick why it’s taking so long—”

As if summoned, you suddenly heard an aggressive knock on the door.

“Julien, I swear to God—”

“Dustin!”, you said, opening the door. “I was just about to call you guys…”

“Henderson?”, Eddie said, surprised. You turned around to see that he only managed to put on his pants, still buttoning them up.

“Eddie, man, good to see— why the fuck are you half naked?”, Dustin suddenly retreated from his way to hug him. “And why the fuck are you both all greasy and sweaty?”

“Well, you know how these thigs go, running from authorities and shit. Fucks you up, man”, Eddie said, giving him a dumb smile.

“Sure… well, find something to cover up, dude. We gotta talk about how we gonna get you out of this shit.”

“Appreciate that, man”, Eddie gave him an awkward thumb up as he pretended to have a hard time finding his t-shirt.

“Whatever took you so long anyway?” Dustin looked at you suspiciously. “We tried reaching you on the transmitter, but you wouldn’t answer. We were worrying sick, I would have barged in here way earlier if it wasn’t for Robin…”

“We got caught up…”

“In the conversation”, Eddie finished for you. “Took her a minute to, you know. Calm me down.”

“I see.” Dustin didn’t look convinced. “Anyway, since you’re good now, I’m gonna go get the rest”, he said, making his way out of the shack.

As he closed the door behind him, you both burst out a childish laugh. You quickly made sure that there was nothing left in the room that could have revealed the characteristics of you calming Eddie down.

“We gotta fight whatever that is, Eddie. We gotta save the world, ‘cause, hell, I refuse to let it end now that my life has only just begun.”

“We’re never running again, love”, he whispered in your ear. “We fight. To the death.”

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ecoamerica · 2 months

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Watch the American Climate Leadership Awards 2024 now: https://youtu.be/bWiW4Rp8vF0?feature=shared

The American Climate Leadership Awards 2024 broadcast recording is now available on ecoAmerica's YouTube channel for viewers to be inspired by active climate leaders. Watch to find out which finalist received the $50,000 grand prize! Hosted by Vanessa Hauc and featuring Bill McKibben and Katharine Hayhoe!

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nolongeractive-lol · 1 year

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My Mega-Ultimate Guide To Law Of Assumption!

If I miss anything feel free to reblog and tell me :-) this is my first post so I’m a bit nervous lmao

Table Of Contents

LOA TERMS W/ MEANING

LOA MEANING

WHAT YOU NEED TO MANIFEST

IllOGICAL MANIFESTATIONS

WHY THE LAW WORKS

MOTIVATION

HOW I MANIFESTED WIND POWERS USING UNKNOWINGLY USING THE LAW

LIST OF THINGS TO MANIFEST

EXTRA INFO

1. LOA TEMRS W/ Meaning

(Got some of these off Google lmao)

3D = The reality that we see

4D = The reality in our heads (our imagination)

Affirmations = positive statements in the present tense that relate to what it is you want to manifest

Wish Fulfilled = A state where you know your wish has been granted

Placebo = Every time you do something/Something happens it makes your desire happen (Example: Every time I touch my skin my skin becomes 10x clearer)

Scripting = Writing about your desire as if they have already been reached

Repetition = Repeating

2. Law Of Assumption Meaning

(Again, off google)

The Law of Assumption states that whatever you assume as true becomes your reality. So the key to using the Law of Assumption to manifest your desires is to assume the feeling of your wish fulfilled

So basically if you assume you get 500 dollars every day, you’ll get 500 dollars everyday!

3. What You Need To Manifest

NOTHING BUT YOUR MIND!

You literally need nothing else but your mind to manifest! You don’t need to talk, twerk, write (you can but it’s optional), read a dictionary, nah, nope, not even close! You literally, literally, LITERALLY don’t need to lift a finger! All you really need is a desire in mind! Then just KNOW it’s yours! Because it is sweetheart!

4. Illogical Manifestations

But I want manifest something illogical! Can I still do it?

Yes! Like who tf said you couldn’t? I get it, because we are taught from a young age that superpowers and shit don’t exist, but I’m here to Tell you…they do, if you believe they do! Now I know what your thinking “THATS BULL!” but let me tell you, there are many, many, many success stories of people manifesting so many illogical things! Superpowers, Being not human, hell! I heard someone manifested being able to stay alive without eating! If THEY can manifest all that shit, why can’t you?!

5. Why The Law Works

Because it’s the law…like dude, it has to work

Think about this…

Robbing banks is illegal, so we don’t want to do that! It’s against the law. If we do we will be wanted for the rest of our lives!

Same thing with the law! Not getting our desire is against the law! So we HAVE to get our desires! No matter what!

6. Motivation

Look…

Take what I just told you, let it sink in…

You can get anything you want with your mind! Sounds crazy right? But it’s real! So why aren’t you applying what you know into your life?! Don’t be afraid of your desires! You want them for a reason! Also! (For the people that do this)

👏🏿 STOP 👏🏿 OVER 👏🏿 CONSUMING 👏🏿 INFO 👏🏿 AND 👏🏿 JUST 👏🏿 START 👏🏿 APPLYING 👏🏿

Like dude! You already know everything! JUST MANIFEST IT ALREADY! ITS LITERALLY AS EASY AS 123!

7. How I Unknowingly Manifested Wind Powers

This was way fucking before I know about the law, or any laws…

So I believed in magic and powers and shit because I wanted to, it seemed fun! That was until my friend’s introduced me to superpowers!

So then I decided that I wanted wind powers (since I’m a Libra). So every single day I would go outside and practice. No matter what my mom said or anyone said, my one belief was.

I have wind powers, and if I keep practicing I’ll strengthen them!

So after a while I was able to do wind blasts (in a way) it was so cool! Of course it took a while because another belief I had was that it would take a while…see where I’m getting at?

My beliefs had an impact on my manifestation

But no matter what the limiting belief was

I still got my desire (my wind powers)

8. Ideas Of Things To Manifest (Won’t Update)

Glow up

Go to Hogwarts (in your cr, it’s possible)

Time travel

Fame

Being a siren/mermaid/merman

Being a vampire

Being a fairy/pixie

A new season for your favorite show

Manifest any illness away

Revise the death of a pet or human

Revise your grades

Manifest a certain video game

Manifest being a billionaire

Manifest your reality shift

Manifest your respawn

Revise your trauma (if you have any)

Manifest magic into your life

Manifest a fairy godmother or fair godfather

Manifest being a decedent of royalty

Manifest a magical wardrobe

Manifest a secret room in your house

Manifest a lucid dream

Manifest your dream skills

Manifest a palace/castle/mansion/house (works even if your underage)

Manifest stranger things

STAR IN STRANGER THINGS!

Manifest a superpower

Manifest going into the void

Manifest meeting a celebrity

Manifest your LIFA APP

Manifest infinite currency in your fav game!

9. Extras (quick info)

You can manifest as fast as overnight or even faster!

It doesn’t matter what it is! You can breathe in space if you want to!

Do what you need to do to manifest (script, methods, meditate, repetition of affs, subliminals, ignoring the 3D, etc) no matter what, your desire is there! It’s yours!

It doesn’t matter what anyone else says about manifestation, they aren’t manifesting your desire! You are!

Don’t depend on others, you know what to do already!

So with that out the way

👏🏿 START 👏🏿 APPLYING 👏🏿 RIGHT 👏🏿 NOW! 👏🏿

This was my mega ultimate guide on manifesting! I hope you learned something! Happy manifesting!

#3dolc x roe #law of assumption #manifestation #48hc #neville goddard #void state #10k affirmations #sammy ingram #Vladia Speaks #self concept

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kaiasky · 29 days

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i dont smoke anymore but it did actually take me like 5 or 6 separate sessions before i ever got high. idk why but it didn't matter how much i smoked my body just did not have a reaction to it. maybe there's some literature on that? but if it's something you wanna pursue i'd recommend buying some gummies or something and taking the recommended dosage a few (different) times until you do finally feel a buzz, and then u can start experimenting with like. what you like, what you don't like, etc

oh interesting!

yeah i can see that, i definitely like... I feel like the more i do a drug the more I'm able to identify the ways in which it is altering. (e.g. my first time Really drinking i was like oh i guess i don't get drunk on 3 drinks, i am so coordinated and normal. (granted, i was more sober than the rest of the room.) and then i jump kicked a door and stumbled up the stairs. Where now I'm like oh yeah i feel the tipsy feeling of 0.5drinks balcohol)

i don't think I'm particularly interested in learning to get high solo, ive kinda served my time as a solo psychonaut making myself feel weird in my room to seek the secrets of the universe and/or feel dizzy.

gotta say though it's (assuming the original ask was re: the placebo reblog) not helping your case that weed isn't a fake placebo. keep trying this oregano i swear it'll kick in soon :pp

#thanks for the ask!#drugs

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apocalypticavolition · 9 months

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Let's (re)Read The Eye of the World! Chapter 45: What Follows in Shadow

What do I even need to say at this point? There's going to be spoilers for the whole Wheel of Time series in this post? Block the tags? Some kind of quip about the picture here being the result of seeing spoilers and/or protection against it? Not so. This place is far too decayed to be much of anything, anymore.

Not so for the chapter though! It starts with an icon of the Flame of Tar Valon, another reflection of how the crew would have died so many times in these early days if it weren't for Moiraine keeping them going.

“I had not dreamed the decay had gone so far. If the bridges themselves are breaking, it may be that I cannot find the path you want. It may be that I cannot find a path back, either. The bridges could be falling behind us even now.”

It's cute that Loial assumes any amount of significant decay means the whole thing must be collapsing as they speak. Everything must seem hasty to an Ogier.

Rand took the bay up beside the Ogier. “When this is over, Loial, you show me your stedding, and I’ll show you Emond’s Field. No Ways, though. We’ll walk, or ride, if it takes all summer.”

I hope that they do get to do this, after everything is over. Loial absolutely deserves to know Rand is alive - once he's published his book - and getting to be road trip buddies is exactly what they'd both love.

The Aes Sedai rubbed her fingers against her palms distastefully. “You feel the taint, the corruption of the Power that made the Ways. I will not use the One Power in the Ways unless I must. The taint is so strong that whatever I tried to do would surely be corrupted.”

Was it even safe to channel in the Ways back before the corruption? The place is so orthogonal to normal reality that you'd think the Power would be weird here as a general rule.

“People there mentioned a gleeman, but they said nothing of him dying. They would have, I think, if a gleeman had been killed. Whitebridge is not so big as for a gleeman to be a small thing. And Thom is a part of the Pattern that weaves itself around you three. Too important a part, I believe, to be cut off yet.”

No body = no death. It's a trope that's about as old as storytelling, so Rand should be ashamed of himself for not being sufficiently genre savvy.

Rand found himself grinning back. Burn me, if I didn’t come out best for a change. I wish I knew as much about women as Perrin.

This is possibly the only time that it makes sense for one of the boys to assume that another boy is more of an expert than him, what with Perrin being solely responsible for this victory by mentioning Aram while Egwene's getting jealous about Min. I'm really glad we're basically done with this because this version of Egwene is annoying. I miss likable Egwene.

As she passed from him to Mat, he wondered if she thought it was that simple, that she could tell him he was safe and he would believe it. But somehow he did feel safe—safer, at least. Thinking that, he drifted into sleep and did not dream.

Sounds like it is that simple, Rand. Placebos are powerful things!

Lan pushed the bow down before Mat could nock another. “Stop that, you village idiot. There’s no way to tell who it is.”

Let's just all appreciate how wonderful life can be when Lan snarks. I am willing to pardon the show for most all the rest of its Episode 7 & 8 awfulness that couldn't be helped because of COVID and Harris leaving but that was no reason for them not to steal Disney's CGI actor insertion tech just so that we could hear Daniel Henney say those words.

“If you fall behind, Warder,” Loial said firmly, “you’ll spend the rest of your life in the Ways. Even if you can read Ogier, I have never heard or read of a human who could find his path off the first Island lacking an Ogier guide. Can you read Ogier?”

Didn't humans make this place, Loial? Surely those dudes were able to go between the first steddings to connect them?

The Aes Sedai faced them calmly. “Trollocs.” She ignored their frightened gasps. “Or Fades. Those are Trolloc runes. The Trollocs have discovered how to enter the Ways. That must be how they got to the Two Rivers undiscovered; through the Waygate at Manetheren. There is at least one Waygate in the Blight.” She glanced toward Lan before continuing; the Warder was far enough away that only the faint light of his lantern could be seen.

Moiraine is normally so subtle and here she's just going, "Great job to your family for making our lives so much harder, Lan. Shame they couldn't hold Malkier for just five more decades. It only lasted a thousand years before they fucked it up."

Moiraine might not have believed a trap could be set for them, but for all the haste she spoke of, she made them travel more slowly than before, pausing before letting them onto any bridge, or off one onto an Island. She would step Aldieb forward, feeling the air in front of her with an outstretched hand, and not even Loial, or Lan, was allowed to go ahead until she gave permission.

I really wonder what she's up to here. She says she's not channeling in the Ways unless absolutely necessary, so it can't be any active probing with saidar. Moiraine also can't sense anything happening with saidin at all, so that doesn't work. Are the circumstances so dire that she's channeling a very small weave of the power, wiggling it around in the hopes of finding somewhere it can't go because there's already saidin, and then letting go as quickly as possible?

Loial pulled his horse up just short of the next Island and cocked his head to listen. Slowly his face paled, and he licked his lips. “Machin Shin,” he whispered hoarsely. “The Black Wind. The Light illumine and protect us. It’s the Black Wind.”

Machin Shin is that delightful third ingredient in the inhuman cess pit that Padan Fain is about to become. It's another standout bit of weirdness in that like Mashadar we don't really get any hint as to why metaphysical evil should suddenly take animate form. There's lots of theories about where the wind really comes from, both semi-credible (another Ba'alzamon project, since the Ways only started going dark around the time of Hawkwing) and bizarre (a parasite that infected the Ways even though most parasites need some kind of reason to exist), and we get neither answer nor (unlike mashadar) resolution. Perhaps Jordan intended for the Ways to be cleared out during the Last Battle as part of some desperate gambit to save Caemlyn? We'll never know.

Moiraine raised her staff and flame lanced from the end of it. It was not the pure, white flame that Rand remembered from Emond’s Field, and the battle before Shadar Logoth. Sickly yellow streaked through the fire, and slow-drifting flecks of black, like soot. A thin, acrid smoke drifted from the flame, setting Loial coughing and the horses dancing nervously, but Moiraine thrust it at the gates. The smoke rasped Rand’s throat and burned his nose.

Pro-tip should you ever find yourself in an extra-dimensional singularity with keyed points of egress: Do not try to burn through the barriers! It will not end well and depending on just how badly you bork space-time it may not appreciably end.

The wind shrieked in agony; it screamed in rage. The thousand murmurs that hid in the wind roared like thunder, roars of madness, half-heard voices cackling and howling promises that twisted Rand’s stomach as much by the pleasure in them as by what he almost understood them to say.

It's interesting that Rand's first true taste of madness isn't from channeling at all, huh? If I'd told you this paragraph was part of his Callandor sequence in Path of Daggers, wouldn't you have been pretty likely to believe me?

Flesh so fine, so fine to tear, to gash the skin; skin to strip, to plait, so nice to plait the strips, so nice, so red the drops that fall; blood so red, so red, so sweet; sweet screams, pretty screams, singing screams, scream your song, sing your screams. . . .

Another great mantra for meditating to! Always sing your screams folks!

“There is worse to be faced yet,” Moiraine said softly. Rand did not think she meant it to be heard.

She meant for you to hear it Rand, just not any of the others, or the political queen here woulda kept her mouth entirely shut.

And now it's time for me to close my mouth, folks. See you next time as we finally make it to Fal Dara and get the real dangers going!

#let's read #wheel of time #wot #robert jordan #wheel of time spoilers #wot spoilers #rand al'thor #loial #nynaeve al'meara #moiraine damodred #perrin aybara #mat cauthon #egwene al'vere #lan mandragoran #padan fain

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