#this week was pretty weak in the fashion department

[marvellfashion]

Favorite Looks of the Week

(June 3)

Frank Castle in Revenge of the Cosmic Ghost Rider (2019) #5

#this looks shit on mobile #this week was pretty weak in the fashion department #anyways this were the only looks I enjoyed 🤷🏻‍♀️ #marvel comics #marveledit #comicedit #frank castle #the punisher #cosmic ghost rider #ghost rider

[erika-being-erika]

More levihan reccomendations!

Part 1

• One Last Time by PiercingThePage

[Multi-chapt || on going]

Summary:

Levi & Hanji have been dating for about 3 years in highschool. He starts to have feelings for one of the pretty girls names Petra Ral. After he starts cheating on Hanji with her, he decides he wants out of the relationship. Until the day he decides to tell her, ends up being the day she tells him that she's pregnant. Will they make it out well, or will Levi start to realize he is becoming his own dead beat dad

• Having My Baby by Countess_Dorkula

[Multi-chapt || on going]

Summary:

Another SNK Kink Meme fill. Follow Levi and Hanji as they go through the marvelous adventure towards parenthood.

• catch me if you can by fanmoose12

[Multi-chapter || on going]

Summary:

The Ackerman duo. Just the mention of this name filled Hange with so many feelings. Mostly, when she reread the files of their cases over and over, until her eyes watered, she felt pricking annoyance. Sometimes, when she stared at the dead bodies of those scarce unfortunates who stumbled upon their crimes, she was filled with hatred and a pushing need for revenge. Hange couldn't deny, however, there were times when she marveled at the impudence of their crimes. And, when she was investigating the Ackerman's cases and saw just how meticulously planned they all were, she couldn't help but feel something close to fascination.

No one knew who they were. No one had seen their faces, no one knew their true names. Almost everyone knew of their crimes.

Hange was determined to unravel every last one of their secrets. She will put an end to their crimes and then she will get the elusive Ackermans behind bars.

• Partners by fanmoose12

[Multi-chapt || on going]

Summary:

When Petra was promoted to a detective and partnered up with legendary Levi Ackerman, she felt like the happiest person in the world.

But, as she soon found out, detective Ackerman she used to admire so much was actually a far cry from the ideal policeman Petra thought he was. He was rude, harsh and easily annoyed.

And, in addition, he still hadn’t moved on from the death of his previous partner - detective Hange Zoe.

• can't keep my hands off you by fanmoose12

[Multi-chap || completed]

Summary:

Hange, Levi and their not so secret relationship.

• Looking for You by fanmoose12

[Multi-chapt || completed]

Summary:

Returning from a long mission, all Levi wanted was to spend sometime with Hange. But instead he got a message from Erwin, urging him to come to HQ. There he found out, that Hange was missing for over a week and that his new mission is to partner with Moblit, Hange's loyal assistant, and together find and bring Hange home.

• A Tale of Two Slaves by TundrainAfrica

[Multi-chapt || on going]

Summary:

"Soulmates don’t exist. Fate doesn't exist. Everything's a choice. And Levi could only watch as she made the choice for him."

Levi remembers everything from their past life. Hange doesn't.

• Free-Falling by djmarinizela

[Multi-chapt || on going]

Summary:

Skydiver and tea shop owner Levi Ackerman meets the town’s resident mad scientist and tries to convince himself that he's not falling for her.

• All of Me by MannaTea

[Multi-chapt || completed]

Summary:

By the time they reached the trees, Sylvia's sides were heaving, her flanks covered in sweat-foam, but they couldn't afford to stop; two titans had become more. Hange refused to look behind her, but she could tell by the way the ground shook that one of them was at least a 13-meter class.

And all she had with her was one blade and a horse who was about to drop dead of exhaustion.1

• Dreams May Not Come True by MannaTea

[Multi-chapt || completed]

Summary:

Levihan. Hange knows something is wrong when she goes down to breakfast one morning and the smell makes her stomach churn.

• Something Like Destiny by MannaTea

[Multi-chapt || completed]

Summary:

Reincarnation AU. Zoë doesn't have dreams; she just knows.

• A Dangerous Game by just_quintessentially_me

[Multi-chapt || on going]

Summary:

A snk 1920′s AU:

Sina is wild, crowded, bursting with industry. Home to jazz, fashion - and corruption. Crooked politicians, dirty police, and powerful gangs have turned the city into a cesspit of violence where the powerful rule. At the center of the chaos are the Ackermans - one of the most powerful gangs in the city, Mayor Fritz - who is as corrupt as he is wealthy, Erwin - a police commander determined to weed out the corruption in his own department, and Hanji - a journalist willing to risk everything to expose their city’s darkest secrets.

• A Simple Choice by just_quintessentially_me

[Multi-chapt || completed]

Summary:

The rain had started up again. Fat droplets drummed over her hood, drenching the fabric. Her horse’s reins were wet and cold; though her fingers, numbed from continued exposure to the elements, could hardly feel them.

Following the sound of the explosion, they’d arrived at a clearing. It was a mess of blackened, shattered wood, and the wagon, a skeleton, was little more than a smoking husk. Beyond the wreckage, a titan lay prostrate. Felled, its limp, hulking form was barely visible through the rain.

As soldiers shouted, pointing at the creature, one of the horses still tethered to the ruined wagon, writhed. When the beast screamed a broken, panicked wail, her own horse shifted, flanks twitching with unease.

Hanji barely noticed.

The soldiers' voices, the poor beast’s screams, even the heavy, even thrum of rain - had silenced as she looked to the river.

A body lay at the edge of the dark, white-capped water.

• License to Science (And Kill) by just_quintessentially_me

[Multi-chapt || completed]

Summary:

When International criminal organization, TITAN, successfully steals an arsenal of missiles along with their encrypted launch codes, Code Blue is initiated. It up to Agent Levi Ackerman, a spy in a class of his own, and Research scientist Hanji Zoe, the premiere authority on the organization, to halt a global catastrophe in its tracks.

She lowered her glasses, brown eyes blinking over the rims. “Does this mean I have a-” One brow lifted. “License to Science?”

“No. But I do have a License to Kill. Don’t tempt me to use it.”

• Aftermath by just_quintessentially_me

[Multi-chapt || completed]

Summary:

Levi rushes to the wall in the aftermath of the Armored and Colossal Titans' attack.

“Are you worried about your wife?”

The question shocked him out of his musings.

Levi looked up, “My what?”

But the pastor was already speaking, “You’re obviously beside yourself with stress – and it’s understandable. Not knowing if your wife has survived-”

Levi cut him off, “My what?”

The pastor hesitated, apparently realizing he’d made some mistake, but misunderstanding precisely what it was. “Your…wife? The woman we traveled with before? She’s ah – forceful. You two uh – have the same, er – strident personality. When we first met, she dangled me off the wall.”

• Terrible Things by someonestolemyshoes

[One-shot]

Summary:

The first time he tells her she’s pretty, Hange is all kinds of filthy - sweaty, dirty, twigs in her hair and mud on her shoes and a great big disgusting ball of everything Levi hates.

She is also crying.

It isn’t like he’s never seen her cry before - they’re nine and crying is just what kids do, especially kids like Hange who like to play with things they probably shouldn’t play with and like to climb trees even though they’re kind of clumsy and so the crying, in it’s self, isn’t all that weird.

What’s weird is that Hange - Hange, with her print-smudged glasses and ratty ponytail and clothes two sizes too big for her - is crying because a boy called her ugly.

• Acquiescence by 3LevisInATrenchcoat

[Multi-chapt || on going]

Summary:

On Judgement Day, the tide brought someone strange.

• My soulmate by a_golden_hearted_snk_fan

[Multi-chapt || on going]

Summary:

When your soulmate gets injured or hurt, their injuries show up on your skin with a slight sting then slowly fade. It was a rare thing to occur, but Levi and Hanji were the lucky ones.

• SOS by djmarinizela

[Multi-chapt || on going]

Summary:

Levi is a reclusive senior student who shares an apartment with Mike, Nanaba, and his best friend, Hange, who he's secretly in love with. Oddly enough, they also belong to the same secret club with a special operations squad. The 104th cohort is a bunch of freshmen misfits they've taken under their wing, Moblit is Hange's lab partner also vying for her affections, while Erwin’s the newest instructor who doesn’t know how to teach. And they say school is fun.

• the moon is dark by alteirkay

[Multi-chapt || completed]

Summary:

His face was wet.

“What the hell?” He murmured touching his face to see if he was mistaken. He was not. His hair was damp with sweat. There was an uneasiness invading his whole body. He was filled with it like he had drunk it straight from a bottle. His chest was heavy, his breaths were uneven, and his right eye was throbbing like a hammer was hitting at it continuously.

He was feeling like he had just lost someone.

• The Experiment by KakashiSensei

[Multi-chapt || on going]

Summary:

After a public brawl between them, Commander Erwin confines Captain Levi and Zoë Hange to barracks. When the Survey Corps next heads out, they are left behind as a punishment. Soon bored out of her mind, Hange turns her scientific curiosity towards the most interesting specimen within her reach: Levi. When his past reaches out to him to claim him back, she joins him on a dangerous journey. Do budding feelings have a chance in the most desolate of places?

• windmill by alteirkay

[One-shot]

Summary:

Here is the thing about Levi, his heart is a windmill in the middle of a wilderness where there was no wind to make it twirl, there was no wind to make it beat, pound and feel. Just feel.

Until one day he got hit by a storm so wild, so rare and so incredibly terrifying but in the most beautiful and breath-taking way that it left him defenceless, vulnerable and weak. Like a tiny little flower which had long passed its day of blossoming in a fierce, winter dawn yet it stood erect with its fragile body, challenging against the merciless winds and the brutal frost.

He fell in love.

• In Your Shoes by Neighborhood_Nori

[Multi-chapt || on going]

Summary

Levi, Paradis Studio's strict ballet instructor, can't stand the newly hired hip-hop instructor, Hanji. As a ballet dancer with his own complicated history with hip-hop, Levi only has respect for the more refined forms of dance. Can Hanji change his mind about her and her style of dance through determination, persistence, and her passion for dance?

• Distractions by Rookblonkorules

[One -shot]

Summary:

Hange’s love for pop culture interferes with her and Levi’s work.

It’s annoying.

• Leave You Whole. by zerothecreator

[One-shot]

Summary:

Levi spends his last moments in Hangë’s arms.

• Moments by Anonymous

[Multi-chapt || on going]

Summary:

Levihan Modern AU

She's a long-legged, sun-kissed beauty with tattoos in hidden places and multiple piercings.

Her leather jacket's on his bedroom floor, her ripped jeans too and she's pretty sure one of her heeled scarlet boots got left in the living room in their haste last night. At least her glasses are on top of the bedside drawer- they managed that, at least.

• more baby snacks by argethara

[One-shot]

Summary:

Levi tries to find out how and why boxes of Udo's biscuits are gone.

• Anniversary by EllePellano

[One-shot]

Summary:

AU One-shot: Erwin and Levi have a short conversation about the woman they both loved

• All We Are by TundrainAfrica

[One-shot]

Summary:

"We’re what’s left of the old survey corps Levi. We’re all alone.”

“We can’t be alone if there’s two of us.”

“So what do you suggest Captain Levi?”

“We stick together…” Levi answered. “We stick together, Commander Hange.”

During the time skip, Hange and Levi's relationship develops.

• Thin Ice by Xenobia

[Multi-chapt || completed]

Summary:

Takes place between events in chapter 90 of the manga. Hange, now commander of Survey Corps, commissions Captain Levi to scout territory in the mountains to search for a supply tower she believes may still be stocked. The scouts need all the supplies and currency they can get in order to carry on with their goals. Against his better judgment, Levi joins her on this excursion. The bitter, early winter makes their mission harder than expected, however. The pair find themselves relying on each other to survive, and they find it increasingly difficult to treat one another as comrades in arms and nothing more.

• Hidden Meanings by WhatHistoryForgets

[Multi-chapt || on going]

Summary:

Hange never thought a materialistic item could mean so much to her until she lost it.

• Of teacups and stale bread

[One-shot]

Summary:

Five times Hange prepared tea for Levi, and the one time that he did.

• Unintended Consequence(s) by Ella3982

[Multi-chapt || on going]

Summary:

Not all of the Anti-Personnel Control Squad died when the cavern collapsed. Some of them escaped through the tunnel Hange, Moblit, and Armin used. When the two parties meet, the Anti-Personnel Control Squad takes the three Survey Corps members hostage with the intent to force the Survey Corp's hand. However, when they find out that Kenny Ackerman has died, they become more desperate.

If the Uprising Arc had ended a bit differently, how would it alter the course of the story? What would change, and what would stay the same?

• A Fire in the Shadows by free_pancakes

[Multi-chapt || on going]

Summary:

LeviHan in an Avatar the Last Airbender AU - a side story occurring alongside the events of ATLA

Levi, the nephew of a fire nation captain, stumbles upon a ragtag group of 5 known as the Scouts, formidably known for foiling the plans of local fire nation control, living in the forests a few miles north of Ba Sing Se.

• Speak Your Dark Pleasures to Me by Lamia of the Dark (VisceraNight)

Summary:

A collection of drabbles and oneshots exploring a sexual relationship between Levi and Hanji.

• Tips & Tricks by Sleepyheadven

[One-shot]

Summary:

Eren’s brow was furrowed forward in confusion as he spoke. “I thought you said that staring at people isn’t nice?” He said after a few moments, gathering his thoughts. He seemed genuinely bewildered as to why she was intensely staring down a stranger when she had told him countless times before that it was impolite to do so.

Oh, lord, was her only thought as she quickly scrambled for an excuse. “I - Uh - well, sometimes people stare at other people because -” before she could even begin to form a proper sentence, Eren interjected. She wasn’t sure whether to be grateful or dismayed by his actions.

“Is it because you think he’s cute? My friend Ymir stares at my friend Krista that way all the time, she says it’s because she’s so pretty!” Eren babbled happily, oblivious to the way Hange’s grip around the handle of the cart tightened. Her brown eyes darted back and forth between the stranger and her son, hoping that he couldn’t overhear their conversation seeing as Eren wasn’t the softest of speakers.

• A drunk man always tells the truth by krissixh

[Multi-chapt || completed]

Summary:

Levi finds out that Hanji is engaged to a rich man. He gets drunk that night and confronts her his feelings. The two have to confront a lot of difficulties to be able to end as a couple.

• Relapses by Oreotragus

[Multi-chapt || completed]

Summary:

Despite having become a great asset to humankind, Captain Levi still has some trouble adjusting to his post-crime lifestyle, especially the social aspects of it. One extremely badly coordinated step out of his comfort zone creates a grand mess that he has to clean up.

• Weight of Survival by otterbeans

[One-shot]

Summary:

Hanji gives birth to Levi's unintentional child. She pretends to be surprised when he shows up for it.

• Don't drink the kool-aid by smallblip

[One-shot]

Summary:

Think of a number between one and ten. Because that's how you love in this world. First you toss out the word love. You tell it to its face that Commander Erwin Smith says “love is the ultimate cult of men... A sect... A dirty ploy by the whatever god is up there to make us all vulnerable..."

And then, everything falls into place.

• until another thursday evening by pinkweirdsunsets

[Multi-chapt || on going]

Summary:

and ever since they were only five, Levi had protected her, whether it was from the daily shenanigans she came up with or the criminal background he came from. She was his sunshine, messy and grinning, and he shielded her away from all terrible things.

until zeke yeager came along.

• Make It Make Sense! By cznpai

[Multi-chapt || completed]

I can't add the summary cause I've reached the limit. Welp i still have a lot of fics here so ill make a another post of reccomendations... HAHA bye!

#levihan #levi x hange #levihan oneshot #levihan fanfic #levihans #pls tell me if i putted the wrong link #guess im gonna make a part 3 👁👄👁 #i thought all of them will fit in here #guess im wrong lol #k bye!

[delicioussshame]

Socialite AU, last part! I finished a thing! Also posted on AO3 now that it’s done.

Shen Yuan had expected that the beginning of the school year would have kept Luo Binghe too busy for them to see each other more than, oh, about once a month, but it doesn’t seem to be the case. Luo Binghe is obviously very smart, so maybe that’s why he can keep up so easily. His studies sure don’t seem to stop him from having Shen Yuan over at least once a week.

Luo Binghe says it’s because he cannot trust Shen Yuan to feed himself properly, something Shen Yuan himself has profusely denied. First, he’s a fully grown adult, he can cook! Second, if he doesn’t feel like it, he can order in, or pay someone to cook for him. There are no issues there! He doesn’t need to be minded.

Not that he minds being minded. Shen Yuan has eaten more than his share of delicious food, and Luo Binghe’s stands above the rest. There are worst things than travelling to Luo Binghe’s apartment and eating a freshly cooked meal.

They don’t talk about novels as much though. This is an area where Luo Binghe had to step back in favor of reading assigned manuals. Shen Yuan has spent more than one evening reading trash by himself while Luo Binghe sat nearby, throwing the occasional question his way as he studied. Not that it seemed like he needed the help.

When does he see his college friends, Shen Yuan has no idea. Luo Binghe always waves away any concern of his on this matter. Seriously, Shen Yuan is a bit worried. Does he not fit in? It seems impossible that someone as charming, not to mention as affluent, as him would be ostracised. Even Shen Yuan had managed to gather a small group of friends during his college years. Luo Binghe must have done the same, no?

If he hasn’t, his fellow students are missing out.

In that case, Shen Yuan will take him out it their place. It wouldn’t do for Binghe to be lonely.

Not that that’s likely, considering how popular he is in their circle. As far as his female compatriots are concerned, Luo Binghe is now Beijing’s most eligible bachelor.

It’s a role that suits Luo Binghe’s public persona to a tee. He flutters between ladies as if he were born into in, flirting with one and laughing with another one with an ease Shen Yuan cannot help but envy, considering his own limited contacts with the other sex.

If those interactions often ended with a pretend fight between them, neither of them would complain about it. It was fun. Much better than insulting real people and wondering later if he’d gone too far, if he’d seriously hurt someone whose crime had only been to be born in a shitty family and raised in a similarly shitty fashion. He and Binghe sometimes rehearsed lines late into the night before a party, sentences that were meant to be biting insults turning into uncontrollable laughter.

Everything was going well. Shen Yuan’s reputation was becoming so toxic it had been weeks since the last time one of his fellow socialites had dared to speak to him, which is how Shen Yuan liked it. As for Luo Binghe, he was both admired for standing up to mean Shen Yuan, and pitied for always being the receptor of his ire. Binghe was more than talented enough to use all of it to his advantage.

All in all, everything was going perfectly.

Until now. “Excuse me?” says Shen Yuan with the coldest, most disparaging tone he has managed yet.

Sha Hualing, sadly, doesn’t seem impressed. “You can deny it all you want. It’s obvious. It must drive you crazy, seeing him with us and knowing you’ll never have a chance. He’s so good, too. Made me scream so loud I’m sure the neighbors heard. Not that you’ll ever find out yourself. Keep pulling his pigtails. He knows, he’s just too nice to tell how pathetic you are.”

Shen Yuan cannot convey to Sha Hualing how utterly from left field her theory is, and how completely baffled he is, without breaking his carefully maintained aura of disgusted condescension, but he really wishes he could. “You’re insane. How could I be attracted to… that.” He winces in his head. Too much? There are probably zero people that don’t feel at least a little attracted to Luo Binghe in this room.

But if there was one, it would be him. Luo Binghe is his cute disciple and friend, not his meal ticket. Leave that to Sha Hualing and her posse.

Her answering laugh is haughty. “Not even you believe that. Anyway, I just wanted to rub it in, but now that that’s done, I got better things to do than talking to you, like him. Fuck off.”

He flips her off as she leaves. Not his most elegant moment, but not the most elegant situation.

How the fuck did she get into her sick mind that he was into Luo Binghe. She should have thought they hated each other! That they wanted to tear each other’s throats open, not tear each other’s clothes off!

… Holy fuck their characters have ust, haven’t they? Danmei isn’t his playing field, but some things are universal across gender. There is an undeniable pull to seeing two hot people seeming like they’re two seconds away from punching each other when it also seems like they might be two seconds away from… something else.

It’s the only possible interpretation. They haven’t been careful enough, and now their roles are tainted by bad tropes!

Shen Yuan is going to have to adapt his persona a bit. Let himself run even colder. Less hate, more indifference, maybe? Or maybe he could just leave Luo Binghe alone for a few parties.

It wouldn’t work! It would seem like he chickened out after Sha Hualing confronted him! It would make it appear weak!

Could he make up a girlfriend?

Nah, no one would believe it.

Fuck, he’s going to need Luo Binghe’s help on this one.

_________________

“She what!?”

“Thinks I keep picking fights with you because I’m trying to get your attention and that I’d really like for you to bend me over something, probably.”

Luo Binghe blushes bright red.

Shen Yuan restrains his mirth. Nice to see he’s not the only one terribly embarrassed by the situation!

Yes, pinching those red cheeks would only make things worse, but he’s still very tempted.

Shen Yuan soldiers on. “Binghe shouldn’t worry about things too much. His reputation is safe. Considering how well he gets on with the fairer sex,” and yes, now Shen Yuan knows way more than he ever wanted to know about Sha Hualing’s sex life, but that’s life,” no one will doubt him. If he has no idea, I’ll think of something. It’s not his problem.”

“Shizun’s problems are my problems! He wouldn’t be in this situation if it wasn’t for me!”

Aww, Binghe, why is your indignation so cute!” Don’t blame yourself. We both agreed to the plan. It’s no one’s fault.”

Luo Binghe looks down, obviously still embarrassed. “I really have no idea where she got that. Shizun never appears to be attracted to me.”

“Who knows how Sha Hualing thinks. She probably watches too much porn.” He wouldn’t be surprised, considering how low-class she acted.

A second later, he catches his mistake. If Luo Binghe is… seeing her, he shouldn’t be that mean to her in his presence. “Sorry for insulting your… friend.” He doesn’t think they’re officially dating? Sha Hualing would never shut up about it, and anyway Luo Binghe wouldn’t have as much time for Shen Yuan if he was serious about someone. It’s probably just hormones raging.

Luo Binghe shakes his head. “Shizun shouldn’t apologise! She’s the one who was this rude! Implying Shizun doesn’t know how to court someone, or that he’d need such a ridiculous approach when a few words would be enough for him to have anyone! What a stupid woman.”

It’s Shen Yuan’s turn to be embarrassed. Luo Binghe is pushing the hero worship a little too far here. He’s got way more experience in that department than Shen Yuan will ever get, probably. “Well, if you don’t like her, maybe choose someone better as a partner? You could have anyone. I know it’s none of my business, and I guess she’s attractive, but really, so are many others who don’t share her… fiery temperament.”

If he were honest, he’d just tell Binghe he deserves better.

Much, much better. Didn’t he see her chatting with Liu Mingyan the other day? Now that’s a woman worthy of his Binghe, almost his equal in all fields.

Not that he needs to find someone just yet. He should take his time, and find someone he likes.

Luo Binghe snorts. “I would never choose her.”

Shen Yuan blinks. “Didn’t you?”

Luo Binghe looks wounded. “Why would you think that? I would never be with someone this cruel to Shizun!”

“But she said… oh.” Shen Yuan is an idiot. Why, why did he, even for a second, believe what that snake said? “Binghe must let me apologise. I’ve been stupid and have believed her when she said you and her were… involved.”

“Shizun mustn’t believe her! She lies!”

Shen Yuan pats Luo Binghe’s back gently. “I don’t! I don’t. She lied. I don’t believe her anymore. Of course Binghe has better tastes than this. I should have known.”

Luo Binghe raises his chin. “I do. I have the best tastes.”

Shen Yuan lets a smile appears on his face. “You do. After all, you have chosen me to guide you.”

Luo Binghe nods with almost comical vigour. “Yes!”

So! Cute! Shen Yuan wants to give him a hug!

He won’t, because he’s the dignified older friend.

Who reads bad online novels, but let’s not linger on that. “So, what do we do about her imagination? Because she cannot keep a secret to save her life, so I expect people will talk about it the next time we attend the same event.”

“…Does Shizun want… a girlfriend?”

What does that have to do with anything. “If I meet the right person, sure. Why?”

“Does it matter what they think? They never cared about Shizun to begin with. Who cares if they think he’s attracted to me. It doesn’t change a thing.”

Well, yes, but. “It makes me look pretty pathetic. It’s not exactly a fun reputation to have.”

“What does?”

“That I want someone and the best thing I can do about it is insulting them? It does make me look like a kindergartener.”

An unholy light appears in Luo Binghe’s eyes. “So what if that wasn’t the best thing you had done?”

“I’m sorry?”

“Shizun feels pathetic because he doesn’t like the idea that people think he wants someone and he doesn’t know how to get them, right? But what if he did?”

Shen Yuan is very confused right now. “Binghe?”

“We knew each other before that first party, right? So I let them know that. We could be bitter exes!”

Shen Yuan looks at him, completely frozen. “Binghe, no.” That is 100% a terrible idea.

“Why not? It would explain everything! Why we’re so mean to each other while I’m nice to everyone else, why you’re worst to me, and why there’s tension between us!”

There is no tension between them! They’re playing characters! “People would think you’re gay!”

“I’ve been flirting with women all the time. People would think I’m bi.”

“You’ve just told me you haven’t been dating! What if they think you’re hung up on me, who, by the way, is a man!”

“Is it that bad? I wouldn’t mind. Shizun is someone I would certainly be hung on if he had left me.”

“So I’m the one who left you now? That makes even less sense! Why would someone like me leave someone like you! Of course Binghe is the one who left!”

“If I were dating Shizun, I would never leave him! He has to be the one who left me!”

Shen Yuan rubs his temples. He knew the conversation wouldn’t be simple, but it has reached unprecedented levels of nonsense. “Let’s forget who left who. We’re not doing that. Binghe would ruin his reputation to only slightly better mine. That makes no sense.”

Luo Binghe pouts. “It would have worked. I would have made a very good ex-boyfriend.”

Shen Yuan pats his back again. “I’m sure you would have. I, on the other hand, would probably have been terrible at it.”

“Why?”

“How could I have pretended to not only have dated Binghe, but to have separated from him? No one would believe it. My talents aren’t up to the task. I can’t make myself look like a plausible boyfriend to Binghe.”

Luo Binghe sighs. “That’s stupid. Shizun might as well have been my boyfriend lately.”

Shen Yuan feels a headache coming. He can barely follow the logic of this conversation. “Binghe, I don’t understand.”

“Shen Yuan spends most of his evenings with me. I cook for him. He takes me out. We’ve been writing to each other for months. He’s been carefully curating my reading lists for most of those months. He has plenty of reasons why I would be dating him.”

Okay, let’s just ignore most of that. “Nothing you listed has anything to do with the character we play for those society functions? High society Shen Yuan probably only reads classic literature, when he’s not working his high-power job and, I don’t know, checking stocks or playing the guqin. Nothing appealing there. How would we have even met?”

“Via work? Maybe you had a meeting with some executive of my father. Considering my reputation, we probably just had sex and ended up dating later on.”

Shen Yuan tries to imagine being the kind of person who would see Luo Binghe and think he could just hit that.

Impossible. Does not compute. “Look, I’m just going to ignore it. It’s always worked before. We probably shouldn’t change it.”

“But things always staying the same is bad! They must evolve!”

Shen Yuan shrugs. “Not necessarily. My life has mostly remained the same since I’ve graduated, and it’s perfectly fine.”

Luo Binghe flinches like a kicked puppy. “Is my arrival so unimportant to Shizun?”

Fuck. “No! That’s not what I meant! I mostly meant my romantic life!” Not really, he meant his life his general, but it is quite insulting to Binghe to imply he had no impact on his life, not to mention just an outright lie.

“That, too, should change.”

“It sure won’t if everyone thinks I’m gay.”

Under Luo Binghe’s breath, barely audible to Shen Yuan, “It’s not exactly an impediment.” Then, louder. “Let’s tell them the truth, then.”

Shen Yuan instantly panics. “Binghe, they can’t know the truth, it’ll fuck everythin-“

And that’s when Luo Binghe’s tongue finds its way into Shen Yuan’s mouth.

Shen Yuan’s mind freezes completely.

Luo Binghe keeps on kissing him.

Shen Yuan’s mind keeps trying to reboot.

Luo Binghe pushes back and sighs. “Does Shizun understand now?”

Nope. “…We can’t be exes if we’re kissing?”

“Forget the exes. Let’s just tell them we’re having sex. That’ll be the true part. We’ll just tell them it’s hate sex. I’ll tell them you’re just that good and I can’t resist you. That way, you won’t be pathetic, right?”

Shen Yuan’s slowly rebooting mind cannot decide if the “reputation for being gay” part would outweigh the “reputation for having seduced Luo Binghe” part.

Wait. “We’re having sex?”

Luo Binghe falters. “If you want to? Because I want to. A lot. But we’re pretty much dating and Shen Yuan didn’t seem to realise, so I thought maybe he’s not attracted to me, but you keep acting like I’m the best thing that ever happened to you when really, the reverse is true, and can we date already? Please?”

Shen Yuan opens his mouth.

Shen Yuan closes his mouth.

Shen Yuan tries to understand that, apparently, Luo Binghe has been trying to date him? Him? Luo Binghe? And him? As a couple? That is a thing that is apparently on the table?

Wait, Shen Yuan actually is a person who could have looked and Luo Binghe and have hit that!?

Woah.

“I…”

Luo Binghe’s eyes grow even wider as he waits for Shen Yuan’s response.

As if Shen Yuan ever had the capacity to tell Binghe no.

As if he ever wanted to. “Okay. Let’s try it.”

A second later, he gets an armful of overenthusiastic Binghe trying to choke him with too much tongue.

“But we’re not playing bitter exes.” Shen Yuan really has no belief in his ability to pretend he left Luo Binghe.

That he had him and is devastated he doesn’t anymore, sure. But that he’d manage to be cruel to Luo Binghe about it? There’s no way.

“That’s fine. I like the one with the hate sex much better anyway.”

To be honest, so does Shen Yuan.

_________________

Shen Yuan positions himself in such a way that he can track Luo Binghe’s movements across the room without looking like he’s doing more than reading on his phone.

He can tell from Sha Hualing’s particularly vicious grin that she’s about to deliver what she considers to be a crippling blow to his reputation.

He thrills when the expression melts, replaced by horror as Luo Binghe’s face turn sheepish. He can almost hear his embarrassed tone as he admits to the moral failing that is sleeping with Shen Yuan, universal pariah.

He can distinctly hear the cries of dismay and what he knows are roars of utter jealousy.

None of it shows on his face, but Shen Yuan grins.

#The Scum Villain Self Serving System #Scum Villain #BingQiu #the AU where SY and LBH are both online friends and fellow socialites

[hinaaspanda]

...and they were (more than) roommates! | njm

Pairing: Campus Pretty Boy + Roommate! Jaemin x Dancer! Reader

Warnings: Swearing

Genre: Fluff, Angst

Word Count: 9576

Your easily distracted mind had made it maddeningly clear; no song, no matter what the tempo or melody, could take your mind off of your one and only roommate, Na Jaemin. 

a/n; hi! for this fic i tried adding my own oc (Hina) just to spice things up!! lol totally not to insert myself as jenos love interest or anything ahaha anyways please enjoy!

Huang Renjun never thought that breaking off one college relationship would be so detrimental to your heart. 

It really was such a small relationship, just one month of innocent pecks on the cheeks in between classes, weekend dinner dates, and trips around the city on your breaks. It was such a minute thing, yet your heart couldn’t get enough. You grew invested, never wanting to let go. Becoming dependent on mere goodbye kisses. And after one month of being together, you were stuck watching him drift away, fingers intertwined with that of someone new. Now, of course, one question remained; if it was such a short relationship, why in the world did it hurt your heart so much? 

You sat under the brisk afternoon sunlight, gnawing at the cafeteria food as your campus friends began bickering over god knows what. You tune out the ruckus before you, your mind wandering like a lost child between the aisles of a supermarket. An image of him swims into your mind as you curse under your breath. It didn’t matter how healthy your break up was, or how put together your persona must’ve seemed. The only thing you wanted was to be in Renjun’s arms once again. 

Suddenly, you felt the stares of a concerned Hina and Shotaro burning through you. Your shoulders shivering at the sudden thrust into the spotlight. Was your thinking face that miserable-looking? You sent a half-assed chuckle in the hopes of diverting their attention.

“Is something wrong-”

“You were thinking about him again, weren’t you?” Your childhood friend, Hina, began rather harshly, throwing off your more laid-back classmate, Shotaro. “About Renjun?” 

The soda that slid down your throat almost shot out of your lips, straight into the air as Hina stared you down, interrogating you. How obvious were you? You pondered for a little bit, your eyes now meeting Hina’s and Shotaro’s concerned ones. You couldn’t defy the truth to your overly caring friends, even if you tried. “...Yeah. I was.” 

The somber air around you thickened with each passing minute as you finished off your lunch for the day. You wince, fearing your friends would, out of disappointment in your inability to shut up about your failed love life, cut ties with you right then and there. You wouldn’t blame them, though. Even you were starting to get tired of your weak, measly heart. Shotaro breaks the silence, a sweet grin plastered on his face. 

“Don’t worry about it, y/n! You just need to find something to get your mind off of him!” Shotaro chirps, his upbeat demeanor infecting Hina beside him. Hina continues, a grin now lining her lips.

“How about another date? With someone new!” 

You almost scoff out loud. “Another date?”

The bold figure of Hina crossed her arms in disbelief. “There are other guys out there, y/n. What about your roommate? Isn’t he single?.”

“My roommate? No! We’re just friends, nothing else!” You quickly retort, waving your hands in a very strong denial. Hina’s head tilted in persuasion.

“You’ll never know until you try, y/n.” Your head hung low as you let out the fifth sigh that day. You loved Hina, you truly did, but with these outlandish ideas protruding from her head, you were convinced she was going crazy. 

...

“What? You gonna chicken out or something?” Donghyuck scoffed through a disgusting amount of food stuffed in his mouth. “You’re telling me the campus hottie’s too scared to go on a date?” Jaemin’s eyes sent nothing but death threats to the aggravating college student, sipping on the vending machine drink destructive to his health. He was offended, to say the least. Offended at how inaccurate his so called ‘friend’ was being, anyways. 

Na Jaemin had it all.  A decent fashion sense, heavenly proportions, good grades and work ethic. A face most people would classify as attractive, and a bright, luring smile to tie it all together. Some say he was the whole package, driving the women of the campus insane as they line up to get a simple glimpse of the school’s resident hottie. He was the campus pretty boy, but one question remained; why was he still single?

It’s been theorized by many, some believing in his virtuous desire to focus on his studies, while others believe he might just swing another way or simply not interested in the idea of romance. But one thing stayed true, Na Jaemin was not some coward who couldn’t get a date. 

The pretty boy sat before his set of now intrigued college friends, Donghyuck, Jeno, and Yangyang, all riddled with such an irritating curiosity it made Jaemin cringe. It was only Tuesday, Jaemin had a tower of school work waiting for him back at home, and the last thing he needed was three idiots challenging his love life. He reached for another sip of his drink, cursing at lack of said drink in the can. 

 “Don’t be stupid, Hyuck. I could get a girl if I wanted to. I’m just...busy right now, with schoolwork and stuff” 

“Oh really?” Donghyuck’s sly voice ticked a flame in Jaemin’s soul. He huffed out a disbelieving scoff as he leaned back on the cheap, plastic chair.   Was he really doubting him? He quite literally had the entire female population of the school at his grasp, and Donghyuck was doubting him? Lee Donghyuck was bound to eat his words, as gross as a child to their ice cream. 

“Yeah, I can get any girl around here, just watch. And if I don’t?” Jaemin’s eyes scour around, searching for a way out another stupid idea before finally landing on the trash pile that was Yangyang’s homework. “...I’ll do your guy’s homework for a week.” 

Everyone’s eyes widened at Jaemin’s proposal, a proposal that stunted even the slyest of prankers, Lee Donghyuck himself. Was he really going all out? Sacrificing a week of freetime for some measly bet? Even stupefying the once unbothered Jeno, trapped in his own, unexpectedly unfortunate love life. 

“Dude are you serious? Deal!” Donghyuck and Yangyang practically hollered, both sending Jaemin a crisp slap on the back. Na Jaemin, how much of an idiot are you?

“So, who do you think you're gonna go for?” Jeno gripped the strap of his school bag as him and Jaemin trotted away from their final class of the day. Jaemin huffed out what felt like the 100th sigh that afternoon. His eyes grazing the trees peeking through the campus windows. Surely he needed a plan, right? No matter how many girls relished in his good looks, he wouldn’t possibly survive without one. Jaemin’s palms grew cold, pupils shaking in a sudden fear. God, maybe he would be stuck writing Yangyang’s overdue essays for the next week. 

“What about that y/n girl?” Jeno suddenly chirped. “The quiet one from the dance department?” 

Jaemin froze in his tracks, looking synonymous to a deer caught in headlights. He tilted his head, puzzled, to say the least. “...y/n?” 

“Yeah, I heard she got out of a relationship recently.” 

Jaemin’s once boastful voice soon grew into a stuttering mess as Jeno walked past him, sending a heartwarming chuckle. Jeno turned around, giving one final look to Jaemin, currently bathing underneath the small snippets of evening sunlight. 

“It’s just something to think about, Jaem. Don’t worry about it too much.” 

...

Your legs were anything but stable as you stepped off the city bus that night. You loved to dance, but you wouldn’t be lying if you said it drained you faster than a mosquito sucking out your blood. The mustard streetlight effortlessly cascaded off of your frame as your wobbly figure began its long trek to your apartment. Sudden buzzes from your phone shook you awake一a sensation your exhausted self clearly needed一before you clicked on the notification. 

Roomie :) [7:34pm]: I bought us some dinner before I got home

Roomie :) [7:34pm]: sorry it’s frozen pizza lol I’m too poor :((

Roomie :) [7:36pm]: oh also I got a favour to ask when u get here

Your mind trails back to lunch, with a familiar phrase replaying in your head for the umpteenth time that day. 

 How about another date? With someone new?

You huffed out another somber sigh, something you found yourself doing a lot, lately. Could you really do it? Could you finally let go of the dead weight? Finally free yourself of the heartbreak tainting you? You feel your heart clenching inside you as you fumble with your house keys. Could your heart handle another simple date?

What about your roommate? Isn’t he single?

No, your roommate didn’t deserve that. He didn’t deserve being bombarded with the atrocity that was your failed love life. He was too sweet, too caring to deal with anything of the sort. Besides, with how gentle and pleasant he is, it was certain you didn’t deserve him. 

This wouldn’t have been the first time you held your roommate in such high regard. He really had it all, a kind personality, decent looks, and an exquisite taste in cheap, diabetes inducing food. He knew all the best coffee places and knew the perfect times to surprise you with your favorite drinks. He wasn’t just some rando who split the rent with you. He was your friend. A sudden rush of unwanted blood heats up your cheeks as you stop in your tracks. 

He was your friend. Nothing more. 

The golden light of your apartment blinded you as you strolled in. The figure of your roommate was cast before you, dawning his classic ivory shirt and grey sweatpants, paired perfectly with his undone hair, and a plate of steaming hot pizza, straight from the microwave. It looked nothing like the pretty boy image he left your apartment with before class this morning. It was surreal, really. Only you got the luxury to see him like this. It was one of the strange perks of being roommates with the one and only, Na Jaemin. 

“Welcome home!” Jaemin chirped to your sleepy figure. He thrusted the plate of pizza to you, a smile wiped across his cheeks. “Pizza?” 

...

Your heart almost leaped out of your chest.

Your trembling, sweaty palms couldn’t stop shaking since dinner, almost breaking one of your scarce dinner plates in the process of washing them. You couldn’t blame yourself, though. Na Jaemin’s proposal was nothing but calming.

“So, what were you gonna ask me, anyways?” You spat through your mouth full of rubbery pizza. God, you need to eat properly before practice. You glanced at our roommate, currently fiddling with the tips of some miscellaneous fork as he suddenly dodged your eyes. 

“Uh, yea, that.” He stuttered. So timid, it was unreal to you. Usually this man had no fear of asking for favours. Whether it was doing his laundry or fixing up dinner on his assigned day of the week, he would never show any hesitation on asking you to do anything. 

“Okay this is gonna sound weird, but…” Jaemin started, breaking into a cold sweat. “I need you to go on a fake date with me.” Jaemin finally exhaled before connecting his eyes with yours. The whites of your eyes spilled out, along with the juice that almost had the chance of successfully slipping down your throat. He wanted... what?

“Don’t worry! It’s just gonna be one date! I made this stupid bet with Hyuck, and if I don’t get a date soon, I need to do their homework for a whole week!” He gripped the locks of his hair as he slumped onto his side of the dining table.

You shuffled back to the dining room, clenching your paper towel tightly in your palm. Anything to help calm your rapid heart down, just for a moment. “And, you can use this as a chance to distract yourself from that Renjun asshole.”

A sudden pain struck your chest like a lightning bolt to a lanky tree, barren in a grassland. You wince at the sudden calling of that name, your taste buds growing sour. You let out another soft sigh. You really need to get over him, fast. You stretch up from your seat, hoisting up the now empty dinner plate as you trudge towards the sink. But not before stopping in your tracks, tilting your head in Jaemin’s direction. 

“I-uh-I’ll think about it.” 

Oh, you thought about it, alright. Screamed into your poor, innocent pillow about it, at least. 

It all zoomed too fast for you, too swift for your brain to handle. Your breathing grew short and shallow. You felt as if you could die, right then and there, gripping onto your bed sheets while freaking out about Na Jaemin, your bold roommate. No, you couldn’t take up his risque offer. You were in no shape to go on another date, even if it did have no actual meaning behind it. You were too tangled in your mess of a life, and this stupid move would only fan the fire. 

You can use this as a chance to distract yourself from Renjun. 

The phrase rang through your head more time than you would’ve liked. No matter how much you shielded yourself from his claim, Jaemin would still be right in that manner. You needed to distract yourself, sure. But was this the way to go? 

Another sigh escapes your lips as you rush down the hall of your apartment. Your steps, hesitant as ever, dripping in a mix of confusion, exhaustion and nervousness. It’s official. You are the worst at well thought-out decisions. 

“Hey” you huffed at your roommate, eyeing him timidly as he washes the dishes. Something your shaken figure couldn’t properly complete without breaking a glass that night. He shifts to face you, a slightly nervous expression painting him. You clear your throat before continuing, hoping that small cough would stop time in its tracks. 

“I-I’ll go on that date with you.”

His classic boisterous smile spreads across his face once again. If your mind wasn’t rushing around in four different places at once, you could probably admit that you found it the slightest bit cute. 

“Really? Thanks so much! How does this Saturday at 7 sound?”

You only had the mental energy to swiftly nod your head as you zoomed back into the confines of your room, your safe space. You couldn’t help but notice the heat rising back to your cheeks as you plopped back onto the bed, vigorously scrolling through your phone to find your saviours.

the gorls and shotaro [9:48pm]: guys I need help with something

the gorls and shotaro [9:49pm]: let’s meet at hina’s after class

...

“I don’t care if you’re just going on some fake date to lie to his friends, I still wanna make you look hot!” Hina never failed to leave you, Shotaro, and probably some people passing by her house, shaken by her booming voice. With her small, fragile looking frame, she was the last one you’d expect to have such a bold personality. 

“Please, that’s the fifth dress in your closet she’s tried already. It’s just a fake date, we don’t even need to try hard!” Shotaro challenges, his attention leaving a now grumbling Hina as it turns towards you. “Why did you even say yes, anyways?” 

“I dunno, I’m stupid?” You murmur, the hint of bitterness caught in your breath. You give a subpar twirl to your audience, a deadpan expression shielding your face. “I guess I wanna help him? It would suck to do all that homework for a week.” 

“Yeah, but he could easily ask any other girl on the campus. This is freaking Na Jaemin we’re talking about!” Hina once again hollered. An action that would guarantee her a slap on the head if you didn’t love her so much.

“Are you sure it's just for that stupid bet?”

You slip into the makeshift change room, which was really just blankets hung on coat hangers, propped across two sides of a corner in Hina’s room. After making your final decision for your outfit of the night, you change back into your own clothes, stalling your response to Hina’s question. You never knew why you felt the need to stall, though. You should know your answer by now, right?

“Yeah, it’s just for the bet, nothing else.” You find your voice trailing off at those last words of yours as you emerge from the corner, holding the destined outfit that made the cut. Hina sighed, plopping onto the bed like the main character of those dramas after they finally find out they’re in love. 

“Just make sure you aren’t lying to yourself, y/n. It could hurt you.”

“Oh really? Isn’t it time you listen to your own advice??” Shotaro provoked, Hina now shooting up from the bed in irritation. “How are things going with that Jeno guy, huh?” 

“I am going to murder you.” Hina’s voice stayed low, barely trembling before zooming through the door, chasing a now escaping Shotaro and his incredibly fast feet. You, however, couldn’t pray for Shotaro’s survival. Not with your mind stuck in it’s own rut, and your cheeks now glowing a violent pink. 

This was just for a bet, nothing else. You reminded yourself once again.

...

“This wasn’t too bad, right?” His soothing voice swam through your ears softly, but it did absolutely nothing to calm down your heart, which was currently pacing anywhere but your chest. You mustered up all the courage in the world to glance back at his eyes across the restaurant table, your breaths stopping in an effort to hide the sudden rush of blood flowing to your cheeks. With his unbothered eyes locking onto yours in an instant, Na Jaemin sent you another one of his heartache-inducing smiles. “Thanks for helping me with this.” 

This shouldn’t be affecting you this much. After all, the only thing you and Jaemin really did was sit under the restaurant roof, order dishes deemed perfect under the social media lens, and take pictures with said dishes, becoming the perfect pieces of evidence to show that Na Jaemin was no coward. However, with the romantic, first date type outfit draped onto your figure, and the general ambience of the room, you couldn’t help but feel just the slightest bit flustered. You shot him another smile, one hiding the forest fire that was your mental state. “Uh, yeah! No problem!”

Silence fell over the two of you as you listened to the clinks of glass sounding off from the dishwashing station behind you. A silence that you wanted to hold onto more than anything. But alas, Your roommate breaks it, glancing up from the ground. 

“You look great, by the way.”

Your cheeks flush a deep vermillion. They’ve been doing that a lot lately.

“Thanks, Jaem.” You barely muster out, dodging his eyes. “But you don’t have to say stuff like that, this is all fake, remember?” You took the time to remind him, not fully sure who truly needed it. You fiddled with your fingers as your ears picked up the sudden ruckus of obnoxious college students coming from down the dining hall.

“You should ask her out, Jeno!” a voice chirped

“No! Are you crazy? She probably thinks I’m weird or something”

“I doubt it, you’re hot! Plus, she’s in my department! I can alway ask-”

“Guys, quick, look! Over there!”

The voices grew closer and closer, the whites of your eyes spilling more and more in utter shock. You can’t help but check on Jaemin, the same expression now burning through you. You mirrored each other so much, you could tell the exact words running through his mind right now. Mostly because they ran through yours, too. Oh Shit.

“JAEMIN!!” The voice of an irritating Lee Donghyuck rang through your ears at an alarming, and unwanted rate. The hollers of an equally aggravating Liu Yangyang from Jaemin’s class, swiftly followed, leaving behind the only tolerable one, Lee Jeno behind. “I didn’t know you’d be here!” 

“Ahaha, hey!” Jaemin stuttered, panic overflowing in his eyes as the three intruders squished into the already occupied, two person booth. His eyes scanned the restaurant, grasping for any way to escape. Afterall, this was certainly not part of the plan. Donghyuck’s curious eyes scanned, too, his pupils finally focusing on you. “And who might this be?”

“I-I’m y/n” You stuttered out, your wrist feeling heavy as you began gesturing to the date in front of you. “I’m his da-”

A lightbulb jumped from Jaemin’s head, his shoulder jolting in response. Na Jaemin wasn’t one for outlandish pranks, especially if you were at the receiving end, which only made your thumping heart wonder; what the hell was he trying to pull now?

“She’s my date.”

Suddenly, your once isolated and vacant hand was tugged to the center of the dinner table before softly getting encased in his. His fingers, notably bigger than your nimble ones, interlocked with yours. Heat began to creep up at your ears. Who knew your hand fit so perfectly in his? You looked down, foolishly hoping that your cheeks would stop flushing into that embarrassing red if you hid it well enough. “See?”

“Oh!” Donghyuck lined his lips with a stupid grin, his eyebrows wiggling as he scoffs in disbelief. Yangyang riled up with excitement beside him, and even the calm Jeno couldn’t stop his jaw from falling to the floor. Na Jaemin did it. He really pulled it off. “I guess we’re disturbing something, then?” 

“No worries! We were just about to leave, anyways” Jaemin still held onto that panicked tremble in his voice as the two of you shuffled through the restaurant booth. He stalked behind you before handing you your coat. “See you guys tomorrow!” 

Your mind couldn’t help but focus on the light touch Jaemin’s palm left on the lower, small of your back as he gently escorted you from the restaurant. You felt like a princess, protected by your knight’s brute strength, as you tiptoed on your path of feathers.  That darned flushed heat wouldn’t leave your cheeks. Na Jaemin, your one and only roommate, was driving you crazy.  

The wind roughly brushes against your cheek as the two of you finally exit the restaurant. The breeze was the last thing you would’ve classified as comfortable, which was why you felt just the slightest twinge of disappointment once the warmth of his hand snaked away from you. His palm hugged the nape of his neck as his eyes softened from their former panic. 

“Sorry about that, I didn’t know they’d show up so randomly.”

No, he had nothing to apologize for. It was your fault for being so greedy. You instinctively widen the distance between you, saving yourself from a wave of embarrassment.  

“It’s fine.”

It’s official, you hated your weak heart more than anyone. 

...

Three. There were three instances in which your heart was set on fire the next day, by none other than the infamous Na Jaemin, of course. 

[10:49 am]

A violent GAME OVER! blasted through your ear drums as you slumped on the couch, watching your roommate die for the 70th time that evening. He let out an equally jolting groan, throwing the controller to the depths of your living room carpet before rushing to check if it was okay. You sat promptly on the couch he leaned against, mindlessly scrolling through your phone as if last night you didn’t experience the most heart-collapsing date in the 19 years of your life. 

Your heart still hasn’t properly healed from it, either. Every time you pass by him in the halls, whether it be a quick snack or a glass of water, your heart never fails to tense up, your throat tightening up in a cruel response. You swear, Na Jaemin was out for your blood the moment he asked you to stay in the living room with him, even if it was to simply watch him fail play. 

“Aw fuck me!” Jaemin suddenly blurted out as he examined the now loosened control button. As if on cue, an army of redness storms through your cheeks as you listen in, his simple word choice setting you off. Your head shakes vigorously enough to give you a pounding headache, before you get the chance to fill your head with certain spoiled thoughts. Wow, you really are evil. 

You didn’t spare him the explanation for your sudden departure from the living room couch. All you knew was that your mind and heart were running haywire, and the only thing that could stop you from thinking about your roommate as anything but your roommate was a deep rethinking of your own morals beside your castle of stuffed animals. 

[2:45 pm]

“Here, I’ll get that for you.” Jaemin’s towering figure shielded your back from the apartment kitchen as he stretched over, retrieving the ranging dish your pitiful frame couldn’t reach. He closed the air between you, his extended chest grazing your shoulder as you stood frozen, your mouth gaping open. He sends you a playful grin as he hands you the plate. “You should try growing a little more, y/n!”

You were too stuck in your questionable haze to tighten your grip on the glass plate, so it was only natural to feel the glass slip through your fingers, shards of the crisp material scattering around your bare feet. Frightened, Jaemin scurried below you, the gentleness of his fingers as he picks up each shard of glass sending butterflies to your stomach. 

“Oh my god! Y/n, are you alright!?” You wanted to scoff at his face. Of course you weren’t.

“Uh, yeah. I’m okay.” 

He glances up from below you, his fingers circling the new scratch on your foot that only surfaced from your astound clumsiness. 

“Be careful next time, alright?” 

You nod hesitantly, staying frozen as Jaemin swiftly works around you; throwing out the dangerous glass shards, running away to retrieve your first aid kit, and patching up your pathetic wound in what felt like one swift heartbeat. God, how pathetic were you?

[8:22 pm]

“Have you seen my hoodie? The blue one?” Jaemin showed no mercy to your innocent door as it swung straight into the wall beside it. You let out an award-winning shriek, your once calm figure jumping from its curled up position. “I think it’s in your laundry bin.”

What he actually had on was...minimal. Nothing but tousled, damp hair and a white towel hooked around his waist. You would let out another shriek if you wanted to, but the lack of air reaching your lungs, all from the utter shock of a half-naked Na Jaemin in your wake, stopped you from spitting out any kind of noise imaginable. You dig your fingernails into the flesh of your poor teddy bear as you shield your eyes from your door frame. 

“Gahh! What are you doing?”

“Huh? Oh.” It finally clicked in his mind that his current appearance was not for the faint of heart. Not for yours, at least. You let out another ear- piercing wail. “Put on a shirt already!!” 

Jaemin let out a boastful, childish laugh. He leaned over, digging for your eyes, which were currently finding anything else to lay their attention on. “What, are you getting flustered?”

Your eyes finally meet up with his as he keeps you hostage with his stare. A familiar heat storms up your cheeks for the millionth time that evening as you grip the limb of another one of your stuffies on standby. With one final whine, you chuck the plush at his direction. Your lack of looking back all in an effort to hide your glowing red face, out for revenge. “Get out!”

“You’re so cute, y/n.” Jaemin teasingly hums as he slips out of your door frame. You let out an exhausted huff, your chest loosening so much, you’re convinced you haven’t been properly breathing before then. 

Na Jaemin will seriously be the death of you. 

...

You knew it was cowardly, but you just had to run away. Your weak heart wouldn’t be able to survive otherwise. 

You wisp into the barren walls of the dance studio, the flickering lights blinding your vision as you switch them on. You shuffle to the corner of the room, dropping your bag before fumbling with the music station. A soothing song swims through your ears as you settle down in the center of the room, an eye keeping watch of your posture. You close your eyes. Maybe this will finally calm your heart down. 

You start slowly, an arm traveling artistically through the air as your legs twirl around the floor. The melody of the music carries your limbs away, leaving your mind alone to think. 

They were just simple interactions, a simple slip up ending with a broken dish, a simple choice of words, a simple clasp of the hands to keep up with some measly lie. They were such small things, so why did your heart light up in flames everytime? Why did each instance leave a staining image of Jaemin in your mind, everytime? 

You think back to the man that held your heart, before brutally smashing it with his own fist. Huang Renjun. He hasn’t grazed your mind for quite some time now, but this familiar feeling wasn’t exactly pleasurable. Your heart soaked itself in that same lonely feeling, the desire to cling back. You froze from your dance, expecting full well your mind would submerge in a pool of sorrow. Yet, this week was just full of surprises, wasn’t it?

Another image of your horrid roommate flies into your mind, your head mentally swatting it away like a pestering insect. Nonetheless, it’s trailed back, persistent as ever, as you grumble your way to turn off the music. Na Jaemin, wins again. 

You could admit, Jaemin kept his promise at shielding your mind away from your failing love life, but he never warned you about the repercussions that were of him seeping into a corner of your heart. His risque, almost flirty behaviour, his teasing remarks, a smile that would brighten up a barren world. He just wouldn’t leave your mind. Yet, you knew you couldn’t have him. If your forest fire of a romance with Renjun had taught you anything, it was that you couldn’t love. You were too clueless, too childish to properly hold someone’s heart. You didn’t deserve anyone’s love. 

After gathering your belongings, you trek out the door. You were so lost in your thoughts, not even the thing you held to your heart so dearly, dancing, could pull you out of your rut. You were in no state to go back home just yet, so your fingers trace your phone screen to look for Hina, your resident childhood friend and therapist, apparently. And you wished you had the luxury of plopping onto Hina’s bed, screaming out all your anger into her pillow as she sneaks snacks up to her room, but your horrid life had other plans. 

A familiar figure stop’s in their tracks, their bag swaying in their grasp一a grasp that was almost loosened in pure shock一 as they connect their eyes to yours. You stay frozen, your breath hitching as you search for anything to say. And by the looks of it, they were doing the same. 

“Y-y/n?” The voice of a flabbergasted Huang Renjun rings through your ear. “W-what are you doing here?”

...

It didn’t take Jaemin long to realize you had left early that morning. Your dance bag left an awkward space beside your night stand in its absence, the dish drying rack was already occupied, with one simple plate and a glass turned over. But more importantly, Jaemin woke up with an empty, lost feeling rumbling inside him一something he only felt when you weren’t around. 

It first occurred during the third week of splitting rent, when you joined the school’s dance team. You had left the room without a trace, leaving Jaemin to search for you like a lost puppy to its reluctant owner, instead of getting ready for his afternoon class. He tried his best to brush it off as simple boredom, but with the way his vision simply lights up in your presence, even he started to get suspicious of himself. 

He couldn’t quite pinpoint it at first, the very reason you always trailed in his mind. It could have been anything. Your immense amount of talent, the wisp of anonymity that surrounded you, one he strived to break to get to know you better. The angelic personality he was first greeted with once he did break down that barrier. Anything about you could’ve easily pulled his heart closer to you. He was in love. 

Nevertheless, he clearly wasn’t obvious enough, as within weeks of beginning your college career, your figure was cradled in the arms of another man. Huang Renjun, resident A+ student and Jaemin’s childhood classmate.  

As the days pass by, and he becomes bombarded with endless homework, the two of you slowly drift apart, returning to the simple ‘roommate’ label on your contact lists. He resorts to the abundance of girls around the campus. Hoping each one he’d fool around with could finally get his head away from you. Yet, as he always comes home just to see your face, so did his heart, apparently. 

Don’t get him wrong, he felt terrible the night you trudged home in tears, the fresh sadness of a break up welling through you. And he tried everything in his power to make you feel better, though it never worked. But一 and he would rather kill a man than ever let this slip from his tongue一he couldn’t help but feel the slightest bit relieved that you were finally in his grasp once again.

“So, how serious are you? About her?” Jeno quizzed through the phone, a now distressed Na Jaemin on the other side of the line. Jaemin fell onto the bed, dust particles jumping into the air. 

“I really like her” Jaemin huffed.

“So? Then go tell her! You should be with her, not here blabbering about her to me. Look, you don’t have anything to worry about, Jaem. It’s not like she’s in a relationship anymore.”

Jaemin's eyes widen and Jeno’s nonchalant words. That's right. You weren’t taken anymore. Not trapped in the confines of another man’s arms. It was what he was fighting for, all those months ago. Na Jaemin finally had a shot with you. 

“Are you sure you like her?” Jeno pulled Jaemin back to reality as Jaemin scrambled to the bathroom. He placed the device down on the bathroom sink, his eyes locking in with his reflection from the bathroom mirror. “Yeah.”

He chuckled to himself before ending the call, an image of you rolling into his mind. ‘Like’ would be a deep understatement. He was in love, has been for months now, and he was finally ready to tell the truth. He probably looked like a little kid hungry for ice cream, but he didn’t care. He paced out the door. He was going to finally have you, once and for all. 

...

“She and I are good, yeah.” Renjun stuttered out, not looking past the drink he hastily purchased before the two of you sat down in the campus cafe. “What about you? How have you been?” 

With all your might, you stopped your throat from belting out a petty laugh. How have you been? Was he being serious? You’ve been pleasant, aside from all the inner turmoil ringing through your heart at the moment. You sent a bogus smile at the man in front of you. “I’ve been...alright.”

The awkward silence suffocated you, squeezing your throat so tight, not a single sliver of air could slip through. Why did he come across you now of all times? And why did he have to be so much more emotionally sound than you were? Renjun shifted around, clearing his chest with a small ahem! You knew he was always a man who would never beat around the bush, and today was no exception. 

“I’m sorry…” His sudden confession shook you to your core, the liquid inside your glass mimicking your shivering movements. Your eyes, out of pure shock, finally take the courage to graze across Renjun as he continues. “I’m sorry for leaving you like that, I know I didn’t give you that much of an explanation back then.” 

Your eyes retire back to the wooden table in front of you. He didn’t need to apologize. He didn’t need to explain himself at all, not when your greedy heart was at fault. “I knew I couldn’t give you what you wanted. I wasn’t enough for you.” 

“You don’t have to apologize, Renjun.” You were having enough trouble forgetting him as it is, you didn’t need this. 

“I didn’t wanna lie to myself, so that’s why I left you so abruptly like that.” He explains, his fingers turning white from his grip on the coffee cup. Your breaths grow short, your mind scurrying to find the hidden meaning behind his words. All this time, your mind retired to the idea of him running away from your clinging figure, claiming that now rash narrative as valid; correct. Tearing your heart up into little pieces in the process. 

“So we didn’t break up because I was being...selfish?”

“Selfish? Of course not.” He comforted. “You deserve someone else, someone way better than me.” 

Your mind trails back to your roommate once again, his smile growing more contagious. You find your lips sneaking in a small smile at the thought of him. Except, this time, no twinge of sorrow had followed. Like a bag of bricks lifted off your shoulders, you were finally free. You shined a genuine grin, your first in a long while. “So, we’re good?”

“Of course, y/n.”

You were so trapped in your own childish thoughts, you didn’t notice the hasty booming steps crash through the cafe door frame. 

“Y/N!” The voice of your roommate flew through your ears, striking you like a deer caught in blinding headlights. His volume was so loud, you wouldn’t be surprised if someone heard him from the outside of the cafe.  “I’ve been looking all over for you!”

...

Usually, Na Jaemin was laid back. Generally unbothered with a smirk lining his lips every now and then. It was one of the ways he stayed on top of the collective campus hierarchy for so long, he was always calm, cool, and collected. He always was, except for today. Instead, he was scrambling at his feet, thumbing through every inch of the school, looking for the infamous y/n. 

He finally skips to the cafe, the faint scent of coffee and flavouring overtaking him. He was a panting mess, his hands gripping at the bolts of his knees as he leaned over in pure exhaustion. It was weird, Jaemin always considered himself to be decently fit. It must’ve been you, suddenly turning his world upside down. 

She’s gotta be here. 

As if on cue, your head pops up on the corner of his eye, basking under the afternoon sunlight which generously seeped through the cafe window. Your eyes weren’t on him, but that wasn’t the worst of his problems. His eyes travel further down your direction, his limp legs mindlessly following like a puppet on two strings. Your eyes weren’t on Jaemin. They were on someone else. 

Renjun.

A familiar clenching feeling pulls on his heart harshly, so much so, that his hands reach up to palm the pain through his chest. He’s only felt this rude awakening one other time in the 19 years of his life; the moment you left the house on your first ever date with Huang Renjun. A flame ignites within him as he stalks up to the table. With his heaving breaths and awkward, stiff posture, it was inevitable he'd summon a couple of stares from various customers, but he couldn’t care less. 

Usually, Na Jaemin was laid back, but because of you, he became this gross, jealous, poor excuse of a man. 

“You didn’t have to be so loud, you know!” You found your voice peaking at the end of your sentence, probably gathering more attention than what you were currently lecturing Jaemin for. A blush stained the circles of your cheeks, though you were never quite sure whether it was the embarrassment of being the center of attention, or the fact that Na Jaemin came rushed and disheveled, looking for you. You cleared your throat to hide your obscene thoughts一a practice you’ve been getting the hang of, lately. “What did you need from me anyway-”

“Why were you with him.” Jaemin cut in. Although, with his stone cold frame now towering over you, his eyes; unassuming and distant, and shallow, hitched breaths, you weren’t even certain this was the same roommate you couldn’t get out of your head for the past week. You simply wave your hand away. 

“We just happened to meet up by accident, and we got to talk some stuff out, that's all.” You prayed that your calm voice could soothe the currently tempered man before you. Of course, however, it didn’t. 

“Was it really?”

“Yes! Okay, Jaem? What’s with you today?”

“Don’t visit him anymore.” His voice boomed towards the end of his sentences, startling even the finest of nature as two innocent birds fly away in fear. 

Something didn’t click, didn’t sit right in your head. Since when was he so demanding? So rude? You found yourself slowly backing away from his figure, an action you thought you’d have to do in your life. Before, he was always a safe space for you, even without your confusing feelings for him. He was always there for you. But now, the air around turned gray, and you were scared more than anything. You scoff, throwing Jaemin off. 

“Are you telling me what to do?” 

“I’m only worried for you, y/n.”

“Worried about what, exactly? That I’d get back with Renjun?” You stand firm before him. Y/n, what the hell are you doing now. To your own dismay, you continue. “Why would you care about that anyways?”

“Am I not allowed to care about you!?” He practically hollered at the top of his lungs. A fire welled up inside you, with no way of fanning it down. Who does this guy think he is?  

“Last time I checked, we didn’t have anything real! Everything between us was all a damn lie! So no, maybe you don’t!” 

You lay one final blow straight to Jaemin’s chest, knocking him down like a line of concurred dominoes. Your heart clenches in a cruel response. You were right, factually correct, but the truth always came with a price. Spectators began to crowd around the scene, as a fuming Jaemin stalks towards you, closing the distance between your shoulder blades and brick wall behind you. 

“WELL MAYBE I WANTED SOMETHING REAL!” Jaemin retorted, eyes holding a flame you never thought your calm roommate could ignite within him. The air around you grew cautious, the only things sounding off were the weary engines driving past the scene of the crime. His breath grew shallow as it brushed against your skin, your trembling figure watching as he let out an aggravated sigh. His fingers, laced in irritation, comb through his hair as he softens his voice into one final whisper. 

“But you don’t want anything like that, right? ‘Cause you’re still caught up with that Renjun asshole?” 

“Jae-”

“Forget it” Jaemin spits, his eyes finally dodging yours. He backs away from your trembling figure, his hands buried in his pockets as he quickened his pace away from you. Jaemin hissed under his breath, everything finally clearing up in his head. You didn’t want him, You were never ready to move on. It’s official, Na Jaemin couldn’t have you, and he never will.  

...

Your brain always had a knack for remembering things, keeping random nuggets of knowledge stored deep within random crevices of your head. Your brain always had a good memory, and today was no exception. 

Forget it.

You could probably liven up a lifeless desert with your endless tears that stained Hina’s pillows that night. It would be life or death to retire properly to your own home, not with the atrocity that was this afternoon still thriving in your wake. One more bottled emotion, and your body would simply burst out of existence. You could only properly pinpoint three of them; exhaustion welling up in your feet, confusion tearing through your brain, and guilt overflowing in your heart. 

“What am I gonna do?” you weep through the flesh of Hina’s teddy bear. After tossing the empty pop can into her makeshift trash can, Hina plopped onto her bed beside you, drilling a finger straight into her temple. “You need to tell him how you feel, y/n, you can’t just leave him in the dark like that. That’s probably why he got so riled up.”

Your eyes shake as they stay on the ground. Hina shuffles around arms crossing in a full interrogation. “You do know what you want, right?”

Slowly, and without much thought pulling at your strings, you slowly nod. “Well then, what is it?” 

An image of your roommate shines into your head once again. The kind roommate you had the great luxury of coming home to, the one always saving you a slice of frozen pizza for when you arrive, the one who reaches the irritating dishes at the top of the cupboard, the one you couldn't get out of your mind. His heartwarming demeanour, his charming smile, his everything. You can’t lie to yourself anymore. With a twinge of determination, you lock eyes with Hina.

“I want it all to be real. I wanna be with Jaemin.”

Hina rested her back onto the plump mattress, a smug grin lining her lips as she crossed her arms in pride. “So you’re finally gonna start listening to me, hm?”

...

“Are you sure about this, Jaem?” Yangyang has never一in Jaemin’s two years of knowing him一sounded so concerned for his friend’s wellbeing. It sent shivers down his spine, how pitiful Jaemin must’ve looked right now. His fingers grasped the horrendous stack of papers; one wrong move could easily decorate the floor with the homework, and Jaemin was...concerned, to say the least.

“Why are we even doing this? You won the bet!” Donghyuck hugged his own stack close to his chest as the three boys watched Jaemin’s head sink low to the floor, and watched his heart sink even lower. “Yeah, about that...”

Even if the truth hurts, it needs to be said, right?

“...Y/n wasn’t my date at the restaurant. I never asked anyone out, actually. The truth is… she’s my roommate. I only asked her out on a fake date so I could keep the bet going.”

Jaemin felt the confused, yet somber stares of Jeno burn through his skin. It only made sense that Jeno had a few questions; Na Jaemin’s beaten up, hunched over figure was nothing like the lovestruck, head-over-heels Jaemin he’d witnessed just a couple of days prior. “But it didn’t work out that well with her, so here I am, ready for the punishment.” 

It struck Jaemin’s chest more times that could count, slashing at his heart, his pride, everything he loved. How could he be so foolish? Convincing himself his simple crush could ever reciprocate his feelings. Could ever love him back. Nevertheless, it was more clear now than ever before. To you, he would always just have one label; a simple roommate. 

“Jaemin-” Donghyuck reluctantly brushed his palm on Jaemin’s shoulder, his best excuse for a peace offering. Jaemin, however, finally snapped, shooting a glare through the eyes of his rather persistent friends. 

“What? You were right, okay? I can’t get any girl I want. I really am just a coward, so I deserve this!” Jaemin slumped his figure一drenched in a sorrow he’s gotten quite familiar with, as of late一into a cheap, cafeteria chair, his heart leaping through his throat. 

“She was the only one I wanted, anyway, so what’s the point?” 

“I think you got a few things wrong there, buddy.” A familiar voice rang through Jaemin’s ears. The whites of his eyes spilled out of their sockets as Jaemin shot up. You couldn’t blame him, though. The last thing he expected to see was his childhood classmate, Huang Renjun, before him. “You still have a chance with y/n, Jaemin.”

Jaemin sent a rough hiss at Renjun before slowly backing down at Renjun’s unnaturally calm demeanour. “What?”

“I’m not after her anymore, nor is she after me.”

Jaemin’s eyebrows wrinkled. “Then why-”

“It was an accident, we didn’t mean to meet up like that. And that talk at the cafe? It was all for closure. It was something she and I both needed, a lot, if I might add.” 

“So… you weren’t trying to get her back?”

Renjun squinted at the utter dumbassary currently blinding him at the moment. “No, are you stupid? I have a girlfriend. And besides, when she first saw you barge into the cafe, her flustered reaction tells me she feels the same way, so I wouldn’t worry too much.” 

Heat rushed over to Jaemin’s cheeks, the cause being a 50-50 blend of pure embarrassment一from letting his jealous heart take over his mind一and the simple, but beautiful thought of you. Everything started to fall back in their rightful places. His head was finally cleared, his anger had finally wisped away. And more importantly, you were moment’s away from being his. Moments away from retiring the ‘roommate’ label. 

Donghyuck leaped from his seat. A directing hand pointed towards the dance department wing as Donghyuck shifted into his ‘fight or flight’ stance, riling up with energy. “WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU WAITING FOR? CONFESS!!”  

Without any further hesitation, Jaemin shot from his seat, his eyes etched with determination, and his heart moments away from bursting through his chest. Donghyuck let out a defeated sigh, arms crossing in disappointment. “God, I can’t believe the campus playboy is such a wuss!” 

...

Your easily distracted mind had made it maddeningly clear; no song, no matter what the tempo or melody, could take your mind off of your one and only roommate, Na Jaemin. It also didn’t matter that you spent a whopping one night without his bedroom just across the hall from yours; as your heart was still drenched in the guilt you couldn’t seem to get rid of. However, one thing was made clear that night. Your heart purely and utterly belonged to Na Jaemin alone. Only one thing stayed in your way; he may more may not hate your guts now. 

Your palms dripped in a cold sweat as your limbs begrudgingly swam in the air. It was bad enough your dance instructor gave not one, but two lectures about getting distracted to blow your ears dry, but even after that public display of embarrassment, your head couldn’t stop recounting the different ways you could finally tell Na Jaemin the truth; the whole truth. 

I want the real thing with you

I don’t just want something fake, Jaemin

I wanna be with you

That last statement threw your cheeks into a heated, rosy frenzy. You cup your hands attempting to hide your horrid thoughts as your dance instructor, with a few deadpan words, sets your class free for the evening. You scurry to the corner, peacefully shoving your things into your bag when Shotaro’s voice suddenly rings behind your ear. 

“Y/n? Oh yeah, she’s right over there.” 

“Great, thanks.” 

  You freeze on the spot. You could recognize that voice from a mile away. It was almost concerning on your part. 

“Y/n!” The voice yelps, in a tone you hadn’t heard in a while. You smile under your breath. You missed his cheerful voice. You slowly prop up, dropping your bag to the depths of the dance room floor. You pivot on your heel, your chest coming face to face with none other than Na Jaemin, in the flesh. “I need to tell you something.” 

After scrambling out of the dance room, certainly not attracting the attention of any unwanted instructors, the two of you hide behind the studio entrance. Jaemin stood just centimeters before you, his breath shivering despite the warmer weather. Although, and you wouldn’t be surprised, but this warm sensation could simply be deriving from your cheeks, which was nothing new. 

“I’m sorry I lashed out at you yesterday, I never wanted to be mean to you or anything, I was just… heated, yeah.” Jaemin finally began, scratching the nape of his neck. You didn’t like the fact that he was the one apologizing to you, when you knew it should’ve been the other way around. “You don’t need to say sorry, Jaem. I lashed out too and-”

“I was being all selfish, when I really should’ve been thinking clearly. I-I was jealous when I saw you two together, and I couldn’t take it.” 

You stopped dead in your tracks. Jealous? He was jealous?

“Truth is… I’ve liked you for some time now, probably ever since we first met. And while the fake date was really fake…” His eyes finally lock yours up, keeping them hostage in his determined glare. “...I really wanted something real between us.” 

Jaemin’s hand reached down, cupping your nimble fingers in it as he kept his eye contact tight. His breath hitched as he eyed you, all flustered and adorable with your eyebrows furrowed in a hopeful confusion. Everything about you made him want to cradle you in his arms, never letting go, forever. 

“Can I be more than just your roommate, y/n?” 

You stayed frozen, mouth gaping wide open at every confession he threw at you. You stayed so still, the only thing visibly moving on your body was the rapid blush zooming through your ears and cheeks, except this time, you didn’t feel the sudden urge to hide such a sensation. Your mind didn’t carry the necessary brian capacity properly function, so naturally, your arms did the job for you. 

Your palms cupped the edges of Jaemin’s jaw, a sudden confidence surging through you as you pulled him closer. The tips of your noses collide moments before the surfaces of your lips. You melt into a passion filled kiss, a kiss that’s been pending since the day you first moved in together. Jaemin hugs the small of your waist as you hug his neck. Instinctively, your stomach tucks itself, hiding the embarrassing butterflies fluttering within it. You felt like a celebrity, kissing the campus’ pretty boy; Na Jaemin. Your eyes flicker open. 

“Of course you can.”

Your’s and Jaemin’s world crashes back into reality at the sound of a pestering holler, one which Jaemin could only sigh in grief to in response. You turn around only to find a snooping crowd right behind you. Shotaro, joined with two of Jaemin’s friends you first met at the restaurant; Yangyang and Donghyuck, jump for joy at the sight of you two, while a distressed Hina rips her hair out at the fact that she missed the most world shattering confession scene known to man. Jeno, to the right of her, calms her down in a heartbeat. Those two were really perfect for each other. You turn back to Jaemin, a wide grin now taking over his face. He tightens the grip around your hand, a hand that you noticed he’s never let go since he first arrived at your department. 

“Do you have another class after this?” “No, why?”

A sly smirk lines his lips as he raises an eyebrow. “Then, shall we go home, darling?” 

Gosh, he was such a dork. “Of course.” 

…

The long awaited kiss between Hina and Jeno was much more dramatic than any first kiss you could’ve imagined. In fact, it was practically ripped right out the current episode of the drama you and Jaemin had settled down to watch. The air was filled with cheerful hollers roaring from Yangyang and Shotaro and the pathetic wails of Donghyuck realizing that一with Shotaro’s crush on the new girl on campus and the random girl Yangyang met online一he would be the last one standing in the terribly single committeeTM. Jaemin grumbled beside you, his head tucked under your chin as you sat cradled in his arms

“Jeez, Jeno’s stealing my thunder!”

“Let them live, Jaem. They’re in love.” 

Jaemin huffed with over exaggeration. “I can’t believe Jeno would betray me like that!”

You pulled Jaemin’s chin up, his face now inches from yours. “Why don’t you forget about them, alright? Just focus on me instead.”

The two of you lean into a kiss, basking in the afternoon sunlight that was peeking through the campus roof. It didn’t matter who was around you anymore, whether they were random strangers or your annoying yet close knit friends. You had already won at life, being the girlfriend of the infamous Na Jaemin; your very special roommate.

#nct dream #nct #nct u #jaemin #na jaemin #jaemin na #nct jaemin #nct dream jaemin #jaemin x reader #nct x reader #nct dream x reader #nct dream x you #jaemin x you #na jaemin x reader #college!au #roommates! au #friends to lovers #uwu #boyrfriend jaemin #boyfriend jaemin #writers #my writing #writers on tumblr #bday fic! #happy bday addison! #pls this is so cute #imma cry and i WROTE IT #shdgjssdgh jaemin boyfie material wbk #enjoy!

[cybernaght]

Guardian rewatch: Episode 5

I thought this would be a shorter recap. Ha!

Every now and then throughout this show we are getting CGI wide shots of the Dragon City, mostly establishing the time of day. They have three settings: nighttime, daytime, and sunset/sunrise. While quality-wise those wide shots would not feel out of place in a video game from ten years ago, with buildings looking all rubbery, I actually really like this sunset sky. I also appreciate that they firmly establish that this is city is not, in fact, a real place. I almost wish the architecture was a little bit less familiar, but making the city look truly otherworldly here would make location scouting much harder. As it happens, the buildings on the forefront have a very 60’s art deco revival inspired feeling, and there are some distinctively neoclassical buildings peppered around as well. We can also see that the roads are very wide, and generally there is a hint of Stalinist grandioseness about the downtown. Unfortunately, it looks nothing like the locations and sets the characters are running in; we also get a feeling that the Dragon City is very large, which is not entirely consistent with the very few locations that were available when shooting the series. This shot does, however, remind me the city I grew up in (Moscow).

The actual plot of the episode centres around Huang Linqi and his fiancé, Li Jiaqi, going missing - it will be important, because their disastrous wedding will produce the most Clark Kent moment that Shen Wei will ever have. We also meet the parents of the couple, who are stinking rich and extremely unpleasant. It also introduces us to Butler Wu (Wu Tian’en) and his son, who will become important in later episodes. Butler Wu is not actually the villain of the piece, despite this shot clearly telling us otherwise. 

Back at the university, Shen Wei is having a morning tea with his dean. He holding his teacup with almost god-like elegance, very close to actually covering his mouth when he drinks, which is extremely old-fashioned. This is in stark contrast with him brazenly and un-gentlemanly showing his ankles. 

Shen Wei is asked to move off campus, because, apparently, having a chief of the special task force showing up at your office is bad for the reputation. Since the professor does not look surprised, and states that he has already found a flat, I’m guessing that he was clever enough to have predicted this turn of events, and used it to secure the place a breath away from Zhao Yunlan. It is up to speculation as to when he started scouting for an apartment: it could not have been more than a few weeks since he met Zhao Yunlan, and finding a flat can take a while. 

At the SID office, we are treated to a lovely moment between the team members, crowding around Lin Jin’s new invention: a popcorn-specific microwave.

It’s very sweet to see the team indulge in some nonsense outside of their case work, made even better by Wang Zheng being there. The fact that Zhao Yunlan is on board with his department’s time and resources being spent on a popcorn maker only makes this scene better. He is crouching on the table, because chairs are for the weak.

After inspecting the crime scene, Zhao Yunlan is spending some time outside chatting to Buttler Wu, and comments on Li Jiaqi’s good looks, since Zhao Yunlan is a man who can appreciate beauty.

As Xiao Guo is awe-struck at his boss’ ability to note someone’s prettiness from a distance, Chu Shuzhi literally rolls his eyes calling those “instincts of a beast”, and Zhao Yunlan fails to reprimand him for the remark, because… fair enough. Very fair enough. It’s hard not to relate to Zhao Yunlan, a self-admitted bi disaster. 

Shen Wei is being shown his new apartment. He does not even look around it, staring instead at Zhao Yunlan’s front door across the hall from him.

Moving here is a completely senseless thing to do. How on earth is he planning to hide his Hei Pao Shi persona while being a next door neighbour to the chief of SID? My conclusion is that from a character stand-point, it’s nothing but an act of desperate devotion; from a narrative stand-point, this codifies that their relationship is about to get very intimate indeed. 

The SID members are interrogating Buttler Wu: as is often the case, instead of bringing him in, like they did with Shen Wei, they hijack a cafe nearby to have a more relaxed conversation. As they talk, Shen Wei is making his way past the cafe, which both Wu Tian'en and Shen Wei notice. 

Shen Wei proceed to follow Butler Wu, who calls him out on it. This leads to a removal of his glasses so epic it warrants a jump-cut to close-up, on top of the dutch angle used mere seconds prior to it.

Instantly recognizing Shen Wei as Hei Pao Shi, Wu Tian’en sinks to his knees in reverence. Again, fair enough. After having a brief conversation about their shared history, Shen Wei states that Butler Wu is not allowed to lay a hand on Zhao Yunlan. 

“Chief Zhao? You’re stalking him?” 

“You don’t need to know more.”

That is not a no. Mostly because that is a yes. 

Shen Wei promises to not take Wu Tian’en away before the man resolves his current problems, adding that he hopes his old acquaintance won’t have any regrets when that happens. As Shen Wei walks away, he muses “Then how much time is there left for me?” 

(And I have to fight an uncomfortable sinking feeling in my stomach, which is occurring a lot as I rewatch those series.) 

The same evening at the SID offices the team is struggling with the case so much Da Qing suggests asking Hei Pao Shi’s help. Zhao Yunlan bristles at the idea, and… calls Shen Wei instead. Of course he does.

To be fair, he does so to check whether the other man is stalking him, but he also calls him by his given name rather Professor Shen, reinforcing that he makes this enquiry as a friend, not at as the chief of the Special Investigations Department. 

During the phone call Shen Wei is absentmindedly playing with the corner of the publication he is reading. 

While Yunlan does not deny that he still thinks Shen Wei is potentially up to something dodgy, he still proceeds to ask his advice on the case. This continues the dynamic from the previous episode: it’s not that Yunlan is completely blind, it’s just that he trusts Shen Wei regardless of the secrets he might be hiding. 

Moving on, here’s what I have to say on he topic of bad CGI. There are several reasons in the world for a piece of visual media to have a poor quality computer animation. It could be laziness, or it could be absence of imagination, both of which are inexcusable. It also could be absence of funds, as is the case with the Guardian. And, honestly, I am alright with that. It’s not their fault, and I would much rather see this drama as it is - bad CGI and all - than none at all. 

And, the quality of CGI here has energy similar to Live Action Sailor Moon (PGSM), which I honestly find both nostalgic and endearing. 

That show also has a talking cat, but it’s performed by a literal plush toy on strings, so Guardian certainly wins here.

While Huang Linqi and Li Jiaqi are being kept together (possibly in an alternate dimension, seeing as how they have emerged from the lake completely dry), they talk through their relationship issues, and the audience finds itself with a sugar-sweet take on the arranged marriage/strangers to lovers trope. I feel a little bit bad about their disaster wedding now. 

At the same time, Xiao Jun and Wu Tian’en’s story is a tiny echo of Shen Wei end Je Zun: the son thinks his dad left him to fend for himself when he was young and vulnerable, and distrusts the very concept of love because of that perceived abandonment. Unlike Je Zun however, he stops to have an actual conversation, which ultimately forces him to quit his senseless act of revenge, and make the first step on the path of reconciliation and redemption. This is Guardian telling us that communication skills do, in fact, matter. 

He also drops this bombshell of a line, which hurts my heart a lot.

“In the face of death every love in the world is mere foam”

On an entirely separate note, I am very glad that the actor who plays Butler Wu is wearing nice thick knee pads. 

They are very visible, and they make a little “boing” when he hits the ground, but the actor has to fall to his knees twice in this episode, both times on hard surfaces, one of which is literal gravel, and I’m happy that the production is being considerate of their actors’ physical well-being. 

While this episode does not mark the first time Zhao Yunlan is being understanding to the Undergrounders in pain, this is the first time anti-Unvergrounder bigotry is explicitly framed in a negative light. The two evil businessmen, who cast a child aside just because he has special powers, are shown as unquestionably in the wrong. Xiao Jun is lightly scolded for his rash actions, but he is not brought back to SID in cuffs, and he is not immediately given away to Hei Pao Shi. Far from that: he is brought in softly, to spend some time at his dying father’s side. 

As Butler Wu slipping away, we once more see Guo Changcheng being recklessly heroic, as he is prepared to use the Longevity Dial to share his life force. Instead of letting him do it, Zhao Yunlan snatches the Hallow away and decides to perform this particular miracle himself. This is the same man who will later sacrifice his eyesight to bring people’s lives back. Bai Yu’s acting in that moment is utterly phenomenal, showing a whole range of emotion from horror to determination to dismay in mere seconds. 

Hei Pao Shi teleports in, and, without a preamble, scolds Zhao Yunlan (the first episode in the series-long “don’t touch the Hallows” saga), and then asks him whether it’s worth shortening his life for an Undergrounder. This is in equal parts a provocation and a test, because I’m fairly certain that Shen Wei was going to save Wu Tian’en anyway. 

As SID members beg Hei Pao Shi to save Butler Wu in perfect unison, Zhao Yunlan states that a person is a person, regardless of their origin. Shen Wei notes inwardly that SID had changed, and, as expected, heals Butler Wu, while Yunlan stares at his power with relief and awe.

Since I have talked about the wide shot of the Dragon City, let’s talk about its counterpart in the Underworld. 

I have failed to notice before that there appears to be a vast city next to the volcano river, some way away from the royal Palace, looming over it. Geographically, this makes little sense: we will see characters leave the Palace and instantly end up in a city square throughout the series, but I still really enjoy this wide shot. It is also interesting to see the architecture of the place. It is somewhere between (western) medieval abodes and futuristic shipment container blocks, with living spaces built on top of each other, crammed-in, and unpleasant. I also love the lighting here, contrasting blue and red.

Hallows random power #n: projecting their brethren. Imagine how useful it would be if they also did that for the Brush and the Lantern.

The next day, Zhao Yunlan and Da Qing are on a leisurely morning jog, while Yunlan is wearing bottoms that my partner refers to as “sheggings” (as in, shorts + leggings)

They are talking about Shen Wei, naturally. In my head-canon, Zhao Yunlan is driving his colleagues nuts because can’t help himself but bring the good professor up every goddamn minute of every goddamn day.

As they turn the corner to go home, they bump into the subject of discussion, who informs them that he moved into the building, and leaves abruptly looking more than slightly pleased with himself. 

Finally, we are treated to Guo Changcheng’s surveillance exam. I don’t know why he thought this outfit would make him look less conspicuous. 

Eventually, the SID will learn that some of their staff members don’t have to be fighters or detectives. In Xiao Guo, they have found the heart of their team, and that is enough. 

Next up, Episode 6: The Coat Zhao Yunlan Will Buy

—

PS: I have mentioned earlier, that I have a sinking feeling as I watch Guardian, and I would like to elaborate on that. You see, I am very scared of flying. It’s an irrational fear, but it is the one I nonetheless have. There is a very specific feeling I get just as the plane starts gaining speed on the runway: there is joy, because at the end of this journey they is something to look forward to (my parents’ hugs, a drink with a friend, a favourite place, a new city to explore), but there is also a painful anticipation, as I brace for the moment the aircraft will tilt upwards, knowing that I will be pushed back into my chair by gravity, battling against an onslaught of a panic attack, shaking, learning to breathe, fighting with everything I have to keep my heart rate down. Watching Guardian from the beginning, knowing where the story is going, mirrors that feeling perfectly.

PPS: The following conversation happened with my partner as I way typing this recap.

My partner: Do you think Shen Wei ever wears sheggings?

Me: Sweetie, I think he would rather die. 

#guardian #shen wei #zhao yunlan #weilan #rewatch #recap #please help I can't stop rambling

[coffeeflavoredcookies]

Krbk OS (SFW) Fic Recs

These are all mostly SFW, even the ones rated M aren’t very graphic but do check the tags to make sure you know what you’re getting into. 

The order doesn’t matter.

Enjoy !

Little are the things we learn by newamsterdam. (probably the thing that got me into Krbk, just an analysis of their relationship through their classmates’ eyes)

It’s ideal by newamsterdam. (angels AU, very very good)

Cotton candy hands by Chonideno. (soft. So so soft. Just. Very soft)

Neon Season by Chonideno. (Road trip AU. Very very VERY good. The pinning, the feels! It’s just. GREAT. Also they shared a cookie and I died)

Avian by Chonideno. (they meet in an airport, it’s so so sweet).

Do you need me by All_My_Characters_Are_Dead. (Established relationship, Bakugo had doubts. very soft)

I’ll be your dead sea, you’ll never sink when you’re with me by Claus_Lucas. (Bakugo is very in love with Kirishima, and in awe of how amazing he is.)

There is going to be a party when the wolves come home by Claus_Lucas. (Domestic fluff with a little bit of angst because it’s Claus_Lucas)

One to ten by Crunchrapsupreme. (ten steps to get to Baku’s heart. Very funny)

How they got detention for a week by eggstasy. (Kami is worried about his bro dating Bakugo, hilarity ensues)

Downhill by eggstasy. (Kiri is the mom friend)

Marketable by eggstasy. (A girl from the management department gets interested in Baku’s career. Jealousy ensues.)

Give it rest by ellieb3an. (Kirishima pushes himself too much, baku is there to stop him)

The thing I wanted to say by ellieb3an. (aged up, pro heroes, confessions, fluff. Very soft)

Waiting for some peace of mind by ellieb3an. (Baku and Kami are worried for Ei and their friends)

The view from the peak by ellieb3an. (Aged up Bakugo thinks back to the road he took to make it where he is, and he’s happy Kiri’s there with him, at the top of his priorities)

And he might yell (they’re in love) by misilia. (we don’t talk nearly enough about this beautiful masterpiece, basically everyone is doubting krbk’s relationship, and it’s taking its toll on our angry boy. It’s really good)

This is getting kinda out of my hand (this is getting kinda out of my head) by multiclassmaps. (marriage proposal. Happy and fluffy)

Dream where you are now by multiclassmaps. (Bakugo makes Kirishima fly. They’re both very happy)

And I thought I was so smart by Slumber. (Bakugo looks at Kirishima. Set after the “I’m gonna make you eat my Horowitz” it’s very soft)

And my heart went boom by Slumber. (Kiri is a mechanic, Baku is weak and Deku is his best friend. It’s all very good. Like REALLY good)

Domestic life was never quite my style by Slumber. (they cook for each other, their classmates spy)

I think we’re alone now by tauontauoff. (they just make out after training, but this is the fluffiest softest thing ever. They’re in LOVE)

What to do about this and you by tauontauoff. (Bakugo tries to say what he feels, very soft)

Stay with me by tuslee. (Basically Kiri and Baku are perfect for each other with a side of shipper Deku)

Pop rocks by dynapunk. (Bakugo catches feelings, very soft, very good)

Peace, Love and Happiness by kkyojing66. (this is more of a mido/baku friendship centric, with hippies and a dead cactus (curtsey of Midokun) and hickies (curtsey of Kiri))

The hard easy by dirtbag. (kissing lessons, they catch feelings)

Wild blood by qactus. (Street Racing AU, I won’t be able to describe how good it is with my own words. Go read it)

A trial in patience by Meadie. (Kiri loves his husband, even at 50, very soft)

A soft morning by Teararesalty. (Kiri is just really in love with baku. They have a cat)

Things soft and precious by gloop. (mama bakugo watches her son fall in love with sunshine fashion disaster. It’s really sweet and good)

Fools by paxus. (Kiri and baku are in love, except bakugo bolts. It gets better)

Cheesy boritos by Mariano. (the boys are cuddling and happy and it’s very soft and sweet)

The force and the object by umisabaku. (a very short comparison of their relationship to the force and the object)

Bakugo can’t feel by Clocklessnight. (Bakugo doesn’t get feelings, he seeks help and it’s chaos)

Just want my head on your shoulder by littlelionvanz. (Bakugo is touch starved, Kiri is there, very soft)

I woke up in love this morning by tuisku. (Bakugo doesn’t wake up grumpy when he’s got a boyfriend to kiss him good morning. Very soft)

Cultivating something so divine by redriotinggg. (Vet AU. It’s a slow burn and it’s REALLY good, like nobody talks about it and idk WHY it’s so good!!!)

Touching and Touched by Plus3Charisma. (soft and sweet, kirishima just wants to love his Baku)

Legitness by generic_handle. (BakuCamie brotp, hilarious)

Matches by Rued. (Soulmate AU, it’s so cute)

Nobody but you by SlitherinsInSpace. (They get married as soon as they legally can. They’re in love, your honor)

Quake by MixBerkaan. (Kiri suffers the aftermath of a mission gone wrong where he accuses himself of not having done enough. A woman is there to offer insight. It’s very very GOOD. krbk implied)

oh shit, I’m the grown up by ohlookatthestars. (Established relationship fluff and humor, with todo as a neighbor. Very funny)

Solid and warm by justlikeswitchblades. (Baku is jealous of a tattoo. just soft and sweet future fic)

Beating in time by patster223. (Kiri is a vampire, Baku is oblivious. It’s Hilarious!)

Lay to rest by Cazuki. (Kirishima is not okay, and Bakugo tries to make his night a little better. Established relationship, pro heroes.)

Help me, Help you by cambarryshortcake. (they’re so in love and it’s very fluffy)

The tap of your fingers by peregrin_took. (they learn Morse code and communicate with it, it’s very sweet)

Wrap Me Up by zizira. (Kiri hurts his hand on his punching bag, Baku takes care of him)

The bound that hold us together by Punkakess. (Fantasy AU! Bakugo remembers the day they met when he’s in a pinch.)

10080 minutes and counting by starlitdreamscapes. (Kirishima tries to convince Bakugo that he should date him in a week.)

Even present; odd future by shizuumi151. (Bakugo and Kirishima head to the pool together, after Midoriya contacted them. Set in the pool episode in s3)

You’re mine by aheartbeatlikehurricanes. (Pirates AU. Kiri gets drunk and rambles. It’s very cute!)

Fermata by HuaFeiHua. (inspired by the “drop what you’re holding and catch me” thing. It has kmjr and it’s very cute and funny)

As long as it’s you by Ireokee. (established relationship. They go on a trip, and they’re in love and happy. Very soft and fluffy)

A tenderness you can’t let go by punchmonk. (it’s so so sweet, the pinning is so good, and you’ll never look at oranges without shedding a tear <3)

Built to last by Heronfem. (Bakugo gets the shovel talk, but really, everyone loves him. It’s very good)

Curry and PDA by CharWright5. (third year baku holds kiri’s hand under the table and it’s so sweet <3)

Five Times Bakugo Pretended To Date His Classmates And One Time He Dated A Classmate For Real by songofsunset. (hilarious)

Glow by argentConflagration. (Baku is very in love with Kiri, and they get together. It’s really sweet)

I adore you by a heartbeatlikehurricanes. (they watch fireworks as they cuddle on the sand. So soft, so fluffy)

Raise me up by Exborodokills. (soft kisses, so many kisses)

Say you like me by gasmask. (Baku thinks his crush on Kiri is unrequited, until he’s proven wrong. Very sweet)

Sleepless by Megasheep. (soft todoroki, with side tddk and krbk)

Such a funny pair by Ellieb3an. (Fantasy AU where little Baku runs from home for one afternoon and meets small dragon kiri and they become friends. It’s really cute)

Tag, you’re it by awareoftheconcept. (Established relationship, lots of teasing, they’re all having a game of tag and it’s very funny. The interactions are all really good)

Take my hand by imatrisarahtops. (Kirishima loves Bakugo’s hands, and Bakugo wonders how Kiri understands him so well. It’s really sweet)

The colour of youth by katarasvevo. (No quirks AU where they grow in the same neighborhood. It’s really good)

Words of affirmation by imatrisarahtops. (Bakugo tries to tell Kiri how he feels. Very soft)

You’ll have to take me down by pickledbrows. (Bakugo is a workaholic, Kirishima ain’t having none of it. domestic fluff, aged up, pro heros)

A matter of chance by Poteto. (Kiri wants to wait for his soulmate, until he meets grumpy boy. With a side of disastrous friends Mina and Tetsu. It’s so hilarious I actually cried)

Heaven has nothing on you by PoutyBats. (Angel and demon AU. It’s really sweet and amazing. A must read)

I’m going to the forest to kick my own ass by WannabeMarySue. (Todo slips a book on emotional intelligence for dummies under Baku’s bed. It’s very funny)

It’s not like that by Falahime. (Kiri is a little jealous of how Bakugo is always looking at Deku)

More than okay by imatrasarahtops. (Baku tries to grab Kiri’s hand as they go hiking together. It’s so sweet you’ll melt)

My worst enemy by Paperficwriter. (Bakugo and Kiri like kissing, but never bothered to put a label on their relationship until hot lion boy comes and Baku starts panicking)

So far, so good by lkaminaris. (Kami tries to match up Kiri and Baku, except they’re already together. It’s hilarious. Side kmjr)

Your warmth is all I need by drinfting_i. (fantasy AU. Baku saves a dragon, and they slowly build a bound. It’s very beautiful. Like, so beautiful I’m sure I shed a tear or two)

Blisters by eggstasy. (Bakugo learns to deal with feelings slowly, the way his dad thought him to deal with his quirk. It’s so sweet, and the way the story sort of flows, like every little detail matters. I’m in awe of eggstasy’s writing. I’m pretty sure I cried. Honestly, it’s eggstasy, like do you need any more convincing)

Against all odds, thriving by jettiebettie (Shiozaki and Bakugo end up working together on a photography project, Ibara ships krbk, it’s very soft, also quality Ibara content <3)

And quietly, easily, you’ve made a home out of my heart by earlygrey_milktea (kiribaku don’t realize they’ve been dating for years, it’s SO good)

At the beginning (with you) by EnchantedEmmeline (krbk get married, it’s absolutely hilarious!)

Battle Wounds by imatrisarahtops (“I’m mad at you because I love you”, so SO sweet)

Boys are stupid by deviance (that one where kiri gets a bf and bakuangst and pinning happens)

Distracted by Ellieb3an (baku’s new costume happens. The boys are so in love. I’m soft)

Guaranteed chemistry by mechanicalUniverses (they run through the rain and confess and it’s so soft and GOOD)

How to play hard to get according to bakugo katsuki by Claus_Lucas (he leaves kiri a map and makes him look for him to confess.)

Is there sunlight on your bed by poetic_leopard (kissing practice! Super poetic and sweet!)

It started with a kiss, so glad we end up like this by crackalackin. (social media au where kiri and baku are famous and their fans ship them)

Life’s a drag(on) by PurplePersnickety (baku meets a dragon and falls in love with his cute neighbor. It’s sweet and funny !!)

Lights, camera, love! By mobs (I read it a while ago and I remember this fic like in a dream? I remember it’s super soft, and domestic. They’re married and happy and everything is great)

Not even close, not even a little bit, not even at all by theroyalsavage (the 10 things I hate about you AU. Kiri fake dates Baku to help Todo get Deku. Very good)

(Not quite) proposal by imatrisarahtops (baku gets drunk and asks kiri to marry him in a funny way).

Once upon a dream by bleukitsune (kiri and baku meet in their dreams and fall in love. It’s perfect)

Past by imatrisarahtops. (“I came back to win you back”, really soft. Really good)

[please don’t] think of me by detectivelion (kiri gets hit by a mind reading quirk and everything hurts. But baku makes things just a little bit better)

Purple’s Kiribaku drabbles by PurplePersnickety (very soft drabbles, guaranteed to make your day)

Rotten work by theseourbodies (kiri misunderstands bakugo and deku’s talk, bakugo reassures him. It’s really sweet)

Seeing red by Ellieb3ean (a piece about Bakugo’s character growth and his friendship/relationship with kiri. It’s absolutely amazing. It’s my all-time favorite thing in the whole world. It’s so beautiful, I am IN LOVE)

So come one come all and see the show tonight by roxashighwind (krbk new year kiss from pinky and cellophane’s pov, so so sweet)

Social Climb by onceandforall (the media is sure hero partners Bakugo and Deku are dating, it’s hilarious, even Kiri and Todo think so. It’s just, really good!)

Sun send me the moon by Ellieb3ean (another masterpiece. Dragon and werewolf AU where krbk are star-crossed lovers! It’s so bittersweet and perfect)

the dawn is surely coming by Notspiderman (amazing take on the fantasy AU, with an immortal bakugo, and his life through the centuries. It’s. really good. I’m not kidding, it’s AMAZING).

The misadventures of pinky and blasty mcsplode by beebuzz (abslotely hilarious modern AU, where Mina sets fire to baku’s kitchen and kiri is the firefighter on call. It’s really funny and Mina makes things 1000x better)

The most opportune robbery by IronicVeghead (the one where Kiri is the MVP, saves the day on his way home after buying flowers for his Baku. Really soft and also cool, since Kiri gets to shine)

This mess is mine by QuirklessWonder (soft day out with Baku and his daughter, it’s so sweet, I melt)

Till death do us part by codename_bewareofthefangirl (the reincarnation AU that’ll tear your heart apart and fill the void with so many feels. It’s really good)

Unleashed by Mysecretfanmoments (Baku skips a class outing, then sees a vid of Kiri. He realizes he doesn’t want to miss anything from Kirishima’s life. It’s really good)

Yours, forever by MissPlacemat (Kirishima and Bakugo run away from their own wedding. It’s really good!)

Achromatosia by PurplePersnickety. (Soulmates AU where you only see colors after you meet your soulmate, but Bakugo is color blind!)

Almost by Julietwasanidiot. (Established relationship. Pro heroes. Bakugo gets seriously injured in a fight against a villain and Kiri takes care of him while being super angry at him. The end is super soft.)

Brain melties by PurplePersnickety. (Kiri catches a cold and Bakugo takes care of him. It’s really soft)

The best medicine by chezca. (Bakugo laughs and Kiri falls in love. It’s so soft and it’s canon compliant and makes everything 100% softer and better. An absolute must read)

If we jump farther by Ellieb3an. (Kiri and Baku meet in the wild a few times and then decide to stick to together and love happens. But also, the way she writes their relationship is always *chef kiss*. And the ART is so good. Honestly, go read it.)

Almost by Julietwasanidiot (Bakugo almost gets killed, Kirishima is pissed as he tends to him)

When a rock an a hard place love each other very much by Shizuumi151 (Bakugo and Kirishima talk about their feelings to Kaminari who finds himself stuck in the middle and he cares for them both so much. It’s perfect.)

It’s pouring out here by Shizuumi151 (man read the author’s name that’s all you need to know)

Silvermoon's Sparkling by roxashighwind (indirect kisses and dumb boys in love)

Quietly by chezka ( the softest friends to lovers fic ever. Also it’s chezka my friends)

the world you keep erasing by Slumber (the soulmate AU where they chose each other.)

done with having dreams (the thing that i believe) by futurehearts (it’s new years and the new hero rankings come out and Bakugo’s got an extra surprise for Kirishima. It’s very soft)

just you wait by Slumber (this one’s about the Bakusquad growing together and loving each other. It’s. super good)

neither rain nor sleet nor all these feels by shizuumi151 (it’s, as Kaminari describes it, the premise of a porn movie with mailman Kirishima and stay-at-home Bakugo hitting on him, except it’s just the fluff and humor)

A Creature Made Out Of Stardust by Stylish_Racoon (Bakugo saves a Merman who in turn (spoiler alert) saves his life. Very good)

Soul Impact by JinxedForever (Soul Eater AU where krbk are partners!)

Heart Made For Taking Flight by timetoboldlygo (Bakugo is royalty. He ran away from home and met Kirishima with whom he formed a soul bond, add some family drama and a dragon swiping in to get his husband back. It’s perfect)

Sometimes We Fall in the Dark by timetoboldlygo (no quirks college AU where gets into photography as a hobby and falls in love as he takes pictures of Kirishima)

astrum by popcap (soulmates AU where Bakugo’s in denial about not caring that his soulmate won’t like him because of his Mom. Really good)

No Secrets to Success by kingdoms (Kirishima’s a little late to joining UA so he befriends Bakugo before he gets there and it’s very sweet)

The Only Word by PurplePersnickety (krbk through the years)

Love language by cyanlana (they love each other in their own way. Kirishima by noticing the smallest little things, and Bakugo by taking care of him. The confession is really really sweet <333)

Things Unspoken by deviance (content and happy Bakugo, loving his friends and being loved, and also, he’s so in love with Kirishima, he just never thought Kirishima wanted to talk about it. It’s so soft)

Scales Ain't The Same As Feathers by Julietwasanidiot (Bakugo is an idiot who thinks a whole ass dragon is a chicken. Mitsuki and Kirishima play along. It’s funny and sweet)

Breathing Half A Breath (Since You're Away) by Julietwasanidiot (krbk got their separate ways after graduation, but they keep in touch. The longing, the craving, in this fic is like no other. By the time they’re standing next to each other again, you’re gonna feel as happy as they do. It’s a really good fic)

Renegade Quirk by threesipsmore (Bakugo’s hit by a quirk that colors people according to their moods. He realizes things. Very good. VERY very good. The getting together part is *chef kiss*).

Prove Me Right by MonocerosRex (Bakugo overhears Kirishima talking about his crush on him and wonders about what he feels regarding that. So he sets out to find out! It’s very very good)

What We Deserve by ThreeNicotinePatches (Bakugo gets the shovel talk from Kaminari and realizes he maybe hasn’t been treating Kirishima as well as he deserves. When a peek at his diary confirms that his boyfriend isn’t sure of Bakugo’s love, he sets to change that. It’s good)

Ocean of flame by Heronfem (Bakugo’s a captain and Kirishima’s a Master and Commander and they fall in love and are badass and they get married what more do you need)

slow to launch by evvi (krbk lose contact after UA but then they meet again and it’s a sort of meet cute and it’s very sweet) (Rater M)

Keeping score by indigonow (kirishima likes bakugo when he’s pleasant but really, kirishima just likes bakugo in general. It’s very good)

Don't ever put me second by cyanlana (they’re both a bit dumb but they figure it out, it’s a getting together fic and it’s sweet)

lionhearted by dearwormwood (Kirishima thinks they’re fakedating, Bakugo thinks they’re dating for real. It’s very good) (rated M)

come on crash into me, 'cause i want us to collide by rronanllynch (Bakugo’s an idiot who thinks his problem with Kirishima kissing other boys is him suddenly contracting homophobia. Turns out he’s just in love).

If You Can't Say Anything Nice, Don't Say Anything At All by Falahime (Bakugo gets hit by a truth quirk and he starts avoiding Kirishima. It’s vert good !) (rated M)

come home to me by aloera (krbk get hit by a quirk that lets them hear each other’s thoughts. Very noice)

Stitches (Three) by Stylish_Racoon (Bakugo’s a doctor and Kirishima comes for stiches and god, they’re so cute. Listen, it’s Stylish_Racoon why are you waiting to read it)

FBO by Falahime (there are attempted proposals, a date crashed by villains, and sweet sweet established krbk. Very soft) (Rated M)

It's Not Like That by Falahime (Kirishima is a bit jealous of Bakugo’s attention on Deku)

By Dawn, Promise Me by chezka (It’s chezka and it’s hanahaki. Do I need to say more)

u got smthn i want by fruti2flutie (Bakugo thinks Kirishima is dating Poney, but turns out she’s into him. He gets a new friend out of this deal, and a boyfriend. It’s very good!)

Just You, Me, and the Breaths Between Us by haha__gay (Bakugo’s got a sleep walking problem and Kirishima finds out and tries to help)

dancing girls (and snapping rubber bands) by gummyconcrete (a lot of feelings going on in this one. Don’t know how to explain it, but it’s GOOD) (rated M)

to have and to hold by aloera (krbk are married and own a restaurent together but their friends are dumb and don’t know they’re married. It’s very soft and sweet)

what we deserve by aloera (soulmate AU with timers. Full of Bakusquad loving and some good getting together)

pickup lines and valentines by aloera (krbk are dating and nobody believes them. Very good)

a godless society by aloera (the one where krbk are disgustingly affectionate and 1-A has had enough. It’s VERY good)

sugar cookies by aloera (krbk get married and they think it’s platonic. It’s REALLY not and it takes all of 1-A exasperatedly repeating it for it to sink in. Hilarious)

can't take my eyes off of you by aloera (Kirishima wears leggins and Bakugo loses his mind It’s very cute Kirishima isn’t as oblivious as he seems ;) )

Doodling the Daydreams Away by loki_dokey (Aizawa catches Bakugo doodling -ehem- things on his essays and well, it’s hilarious)

hero worship by amaranthinecanicular (This is one hell of an amazing fic. there’s no way to describe what it’s about without spoiling. It’s tagged as “creator chose not to use archive warnings”)

Breathe by CitrusVeins (A mission goes wrong and Kirishima proposes to a dying Bakugo, it’s very emotional)

symphony number nine by gummyconcrete (It’s soft. It’s so good and the krbk flavor is just, exquisite.)

my own soul's warning by obiter (future Bakugo barges into the present and Bakugo, who’s rejected Kirishima is jealous of their proximity. PH!Bakugo helps him figure out some shit. It’s very good and I really loved how they wrote Kirishima. It isn’t actually tagged as “creator chose not to use archive warnings” but I think it should be)

The Way We Love i_write_shakespeare_not_disney (This is just, so good. Krbk's interactions are so good and their friendship is just so damn important and they're so in love and so stupid (especially bkg tbh) and it's just. perfect. please, do yourself a favor and read it, it'll inject happiness straight into your veins).

#wow #this one is a monster #well i mean it IS the result of 4 years of non-stop fic hunting #krbk #kiribaku #bakushima #krbk fic recs #fic recs #be careful of the ones tagged as creator chose not to use archive warnings because it means there can be literally anything in them #and it wont be mentioned in the fic's tags #it basically means big surprise #that could be good or bad #so be careful

[classic80sand90smovieloves2]

Meeting and Dating Angel Guzman

(My crap gif)(Requested by anonymous)

- You meet Angel in Mr. Escalantes class. But you knew of him before then, let’s just say he had a reputation around the school. Before your class together you thought Angel was just another gangbanger. He got into fights, he acted tough, hung around the boys who started trouble; what else were you supposed to think.

- You weren’t particularly excited when he walked into your math class; very late might you add, with his buddy. You also werent excited when he arrived the next day and was sat a seat behind you in the row next to yours.

- Things get better when his friends stop showing up to class. You see a different side of him and one that you like much better.

- Angel’s had a crush on you for a while but never had an excuse to talk to you or the time to approach you without his friends catching him. He’s pleasantly surprised when he sees you in class on your first day.

- A big part of his uncomfortableness with Escalante teasing him is because of you. He doesn’t want to be made a fool of in front of you; or anyone in the class for that matter.

- One day you laugh at one of his smartass comments, the next day he asks you for a piece of paper, and before you know it the two of you occasionally speak to each other.

- He would definitely loiter around the hallways, standing behind a corner he knows you pass and waiting there until he sees you. He’d quickly put out his cigarette before catching up to you and starting a short conversation.

- After you’re on somewhat friendly terms he’d make sure to get to Escalante’s class early so that he could be there before you. When you arrive he’d open the door for you and try to speak with you a little before class.

- Mr. Escalante takes note of his behavior and gives him looks whenever he sees him trying to get closer to you. Before Angel actually asks you out I can see him approaching Escalante with “hypothetical” questions about girls/dating.

- Angel catches you after school one day in his usual fashion except this time he asks if you’re doing anything and if you’d like to come over to his house since his mother and grandmother are making *insert food here*.

- His family is really important to him, the town you live in isn’t exactly filled with things to do, and he doesn’t want to stumble across his friends out in public (neither do you). So honestly it’s the perfect place for him to bring you.

- He also doesn’t exactly call it a date so you go there as a “friend from school” which makes things a lot less awkward and gives you time to warm up to the older women. Even though he doesn’t say it, you know from the way he acts that it’s not just a platonic hang out.

- Things go really well, you have a great time, his family embarrasses him, and they love you as much as he does. His grandma almost pulls out his baby pictures but he’s thankfully; for him at least, able to stop her.

- As he’s walking you home from his house the two of you stop under a streetlight for a minute and he makes his move. He tilts your face up and softly kisses you.

- He continues to walk you home while the two of you struggle to stay composed. You just can’t seem to keep the smile off your face and neither can he. When he gets home himself both his mother and grandmother are waiting for him and tease him about his lovestruck face.

- Ever since then the two of you were a couple.

- He likes to act tough but he’s a big softy at heart. When you’re alone you get to see just how sweet he is.

- He’s showing you affection constantly although he keeps it on the down low when you’re in public.

- You’re almost always going to have to pluck a toothpick out of his mouth so that you can kiss him.

- Neck and jaw kisses.

- In all seriousness he can turn your legs to jelly when he kisses you. You’re thankful that he keeps you pressed close to him because you’d probably swoon and fall on your ass if he didn’t.

- Handshakes; they always end with him kissing your knuckles.

- Tracing his tattoos with your fingers while you play with his hands.

- Going to sit with him as he smokes; he always makes sure to blow away from you.

- Surprisingly enough he’s quite the gentleman, always opening doors for you or giving up his seat.

- Swearing is a form of endearment in your relationship except around his family. His mother would lose it if she heard him lovingly call you a bitch.

- Dodges when you try to touch his hair.

- There isn’t a lot of things for teenagers to do in your city, not only is there not much to do but the two of you are kind of broke so you usually just wind up hanging out somewhere like one of your houses or a park.

- He insists on paying for dates, he won’t let you spend your money on him unless it’s like his birthday.

- Hugging and cuddling him is the best because he smells sooooo good.

- You switch things up everytime you cuddle. You swear the two of you never lay/sit in the same position twice.

- Gets jealous when other guys talk to you; he doesn’t trust them. He tries to catch as much of what the guy or you say before he decides to interject (depending on the situation).

- He quietly does what you tell him to do without much of a fight, like if you ask him to get you something or ask him for a favor he doesn’t hesitate to do it or make a big deal out of it when he does.

- Speaking Spanish, if you don’t know Spanish him and his family would most likely take advantage of it; in a nice way. Like his grandmother would comment about how pretty you are to him in Spanish.

- Kind of embarrassed by his tattoos. He tries to hide them from you and even more so your parents.

- As long as it’s not Mr. Escalante’s class he doesn’t really have a problem cutting it with you.

- Helping each other study. He’s actually really smart when he puts in the effort which he often does so on the down low.

- He likes having the excuse that he’s carrying something school related of “yours” so that he doesn’t need to worry about if his friends catch him (at least when they were actually friends).

- He quietly gets your attention in class to show you how one of your classmates is sleeping or doing something equally as amusing.

- Gets attached quickly; you show him some affection/attention and he’s yours for forever. He’s not touch starved but his life has been lacking in the romance department.

- Momma’s boy; its a good thing she loves you.

- Helping him take care of his grandmother when you go over to his house after school.

- Since he takes care of his mother and grandmother you can rest assured that he wouldn’t be embarrassed to pick you up anything period related.

- Would want to take care of you when you’re not feeling well. He feels bad when you don’t let him help you, he knows you just don’t want him getting sick because of you but it’s a habit of his to worry about and be there for his girls.

- Subtly showing your disapproval of him staying out all night. He knows what you’re getting at and agrees himself that he should stop but he tiredly makes a joke instead of saying so.

- Though you might be a slight hypocrite since you’ve snuck out to be with him during the night more than a few times.

- Lending him supplies when he doesn’t bring them to class.

- Makes kiss faces at you especially after saying something sarcastic and/or you scoffing at him.

- He looks over at you whenever he makes a joke. You try your best to stifle a laugh at his smartass jokes and antics.

- Sharing food, especially oranges and drinks on a hot summer day.

- Trying to stop him from fighting. He loves you and wants to make you happy but sometimes you won’t be able to succeed.

- Very protective; he isn’t keen on you taking public transport or walking the streets alone. He always walks closest to the road when you’re walking on the sidewalk together.

- Hes completely ready to start a full on fist fight with someone for disrespecting you.

“What? I’m doing this for you.” He says all worked up as you try to hold him back from the person. 

- Feeling bad for thinking he looks hot when he’s angry... and when he spit’s at people. 

- Smoothing out his hair and wiping any blood from his face after he gets into a fight. It helps calm him down and gives you time to give him that tsk™.

- Trying to help calm him down after a fight. Depending on how angry he is there’s a few way that you can... help.

- When he gets angry he gets angry. He never gets as furious as he can be at you but you’ve seen your fair share of moments when trying to calm him down. He often slams his head on things when he gets mad but he’s also been known to throw or flip things.

- Comes to your house uninvited...a lot. Be ready for him to show up without any warning.

- Your parents would probably care more if he wasn’t so sweet to them and didn’t help with things around the house as much. When a kid fixes your car, takes out the trash, helps with the dishes and mows your lawn for free every week it’s kind of hard not to like him.

- Hes got a lot of balls, sometimes he genuinely shocks you with the shit he says or does.

- Sitting in random positions together or on things you usually wouldn’t sit on. A lot of the time he just chills on your kitchen counter while you cook.

- If his grandma knows he’s going to see you she makes him take food or flowers.

- The both of you take turns insulting each other...lovingly.

- Lowkey muscular. When he took off his shirt in front of you for the first time your eyes nearly fell out of your head; all you could do was gulp.

- If you get hurt or sick then prepare to be called stupid and blamed while he takes care of you. It’s just a reflex of his; he has trouble voicing the feelings he has that make him feel weak. 

- Doesn’t like pictures; you have to fight him to take one with you.

- He has quite a few pictures of you though. His grandmother keeps a framed photograph of the two of you in the living room.

- Has and will take his clothes off instead of getting them dirty or wet. You were washing your car and he just straight stripped in your driveway when you asked him to help you a little.

- Can and will fix your car if there’s a problem with it. Him and his boys probably “steal” it for a little while and make it look and run like it’s brand new.

- Jokingly makes a cross at you with his fingers whenever you mess with him or look like you’re about to voice your disapproval over something he’s done.

- Kind of just sits down and takes it when you get angry with him. He usually rolls his eyes or bulges them out a little when you turn your back to him.

- You don’t fight very often, there’s only been a few actual fights in your relationship. The biggest fight you’ve ever had was about him not wanting people knowing about your relationship(in its beginning). He just wanted to protect you and keep you away from the shit he gets himself into; you understood that.

- But let’s be honest, a secret relationship is hard, not being able to acknowledge your boyfriend in front of people is hard, hearing other girls say he’s attractive is hard. And that isn’t lost on him either, he hates seeing other guys flirt with you or not being able to walk you to class like a proper boyfriend.

- He’s really good at apologies. It’s so hard for you not to forgive him especially since you can’t stand being upset with him in the first place.

“I may be a sinner but I’m willing to pay for my sins.”

- He introduces you to Chuco who really doesn’t care. He does kind of hit on you though. After the two of them stop hanging out he flirts with you just to piss him off and tries to get answers out of you.

- Trying to cheer him up after the whole scandal and after he cuts ties with his gang. He’s a bit of a pessimist in general and you try your best to change that, he thinks it’s cute.

- Supporting him and his ambitions.

- He wants to prove himself to you even though you assure him that he doesn’t have to and that you love him no matter who he is.

- He says “love you” often, anytime the two of you say goodbye he’ll say it as though it’s the easiest thing in the world for him to do.

- If he didn’t marry you; which he in all seriousness plans on doing, his mother and grandmother would never let him live it down.

#angel guzman #angel guzman imagine #angel guzman headcanons #angel guzman headcanon #80s movie imagine #80s movie headcanons #80s movie headcanon #80s movie imagines #80s imagine #stand and deliver #stand and deliver imagine #stand and deliver imagines #stand and deliver headcanons #stand and deliver headcanon

[keirangoldenwatch]

WIP Wednesday

It's that time of week again! When I put a chunk of a chapter here to keep my brain focused on my fics instead of whatever-the-fuck-else I've got on it. Whee.

Onward!

-----

“We were gone for thirty minutes,” Rezhek said wearily, speaking up so her voice carried down the hall. The taller of the two silhouettes hesitated by a couple of steps. “I’m going to assume that wasn’t enough time to get into more trouble, but please, feel free to prove me wrong.”

“No trouble here, General Grumpy! It was just some harmless shopping!” Tivvea cheerfully replied. She didn’t break her stride until she was in detailed range of Rezhek’s sight, or more accurately close enough to go in for another arm-around-the-shoulder lean. Rezhek dodged.

Tivvea snorted and used the missed momentum to turn on her heel, facing the pair of soldiers with a big smile. “Clothes shopping, specifically! I don’t know about some of you, but some of us like to wear stuff that isn’t several tons of metal,” she met the glower Aric gave her with absolute shamelessness, “Not that you don’t rock it! Corso, get over where Rez can actually see you. I need to show you off.”

Corso was already darker around the cheeks when he, too, stepped into Rezhek’s field of vision. That wasn’t the only deviation from his standard appearance, though--then again, his blush was becoming more common on his face than not, thanks to somebody. The heavy Mantellian armor he’d sported since they’d met had been replaced with a set that was a bit more form fitting than the former’s blocky, simple design, and atop it was a long, leather duster with that accentuated his shoulders and arms. It certainly looked more fashionable, but Rezhek wasn’t much of a judge on that aspect of clothing. Rather, she had to wonder how practical a coat that long might really be in a firefight, or if some of the leather straps on the chestpiece and legs were actually doing anything functional or if they were just there to make it look “pretty”. Tivvea extended her arms towards him and did a little jazz-hands gesture.

“Ta-daah! Living proof that everyone looks better in leather.” She sounded so proud of herself. Corso raised his hand to rub at the back of his neck. Tivvea either missed or ignored his embarrassment, because when nobody gave her the immediate response she wanted, she pouted and closed the distance between herself and Corso and started pulling and preening at the coat. “Pssh. All of you wouldn’t know fashion if it shot you in the ‘cargo hold’.”

“The coat doesn’t look very practical,” Aric said what Rezhek was thinking, and about as bluntly.

Tivvea let out a huff of hot air. “It’s armored! And it’s got a lot of compartments for holding extra weapons or medikits or kark like that. Besides,” she reached up and adjusted the heavy collar around Corso’s neck, which put her fingers right near his jaw. Rezhek kept the twitch of her lips still when his face grew darker from that. “My first mate has to look the part, you know? Mercenary armor just isn’t going to cut it when you’re flying on a ship as classy as mine. You’ve gotta look the part! And that part has to be as hot as me. So it’s a high bar. But he pulls it off!”

Corso mumbled something that Rezhek thought might have been “You think I’m...?”, before he trailed off. He was grinning like a fool behind the coat’s collar.

Rezhek sighed and placed her hands on her hips. “Alright, yes, fine, it looks good on him. I’m sure it’s very color coordinated as well.” Tivvea’s grin came back and she nodded. Corso just took the compliment with a weak chuckle. “But we have work to do. One of Tavus’ team was spotted on Taris.”

“Taris?” Tivvea’s grin weakened. “Oh, great. I’ve always wanted to visit a planet completely destroyed by orbital bombardment. So many smuggling opportunities there.” The sarcasm was strong with that line.

“It’s not about your smuggling,” Aric gave a sharp shake of his head, “We got permission to make your ship Havoc Squad’s official charter. So you’re going to go where we need you to, when we need you to. Understood?”

“That comes with pay, right? Because Risha’s plan was kind of lacking in the ‘steady income until the big pay-off’ department, but I could find other ways.”

“Captain...” Corso started, somewhere between a warning and imploring her not to poke the Cathar.

“The Republic will compensate you, if you keep your end of the deal.” Rezhek interjected, before Tivvea could get the rise out of Aric that she was digging for. Tivvea stuck her tongue out at her, but Corso mouthed a word of thanks over her head. Aric’s scowl lessened slightly. “They’ll also provide us with requisitions. Food, ammunition, medical supplies, etcetera. So you get paid, and you get free supplies.”

Tivvea drew back her tongue and cupped her pointy chin in her hand, acting contemplative. “I do like ‘free’ stuff.”

“You’d also get to shoot Imps, assuming you still like to do that.” Aric added, entirely deadpan. Rezhek failed to catch the small snort that triggered.

“I would have done that anyway, but--!” Tivvea stuck the hand holding her chin out towards them, her thumb up and her smile back to it’s full beam. “Let’s karking go! And you guys remember that I already agreed to this, like, earlier today, right? My memory’s not that bad.”

“You could have changed your mind,” Corso said with a slight grin, “Or grown some sympathy for the Empire in the last half hour.”

Tivvea grimaced back at him. “I’d ask you to shoot me if that ever happened. But, like, in the knee or something. Even if I went crazy I’d want to still look good.”

#my writing #swtor #swtor fic #Surprisingly Good Judge of Character #wip wednesday #corso riggs #aric jorgan #aric 'grumpy cat' jorgan #rezhek iaseed #tivvea easdel

[im-a-space-gay]

Some Notes for the Mix-Matched AU (aka the slow burn Analogical AU where Logan’s the school punk and Virgil’s the school nerd)

Logan Croft-

Resident punk

Tol boi, and I mean real tol with the muscles

He wears contacts because he’s found some people don’t take him serious when he wears glasses

When he was younger, he was very smart and wanted to learn everything, but he found out it wasn’t smarts that would help him survive, but being intimidating, and most people didn’t find it intimidating when he kept correcting them. Therefore, he stopped trying to learn and just went with the flow

Somehow hasn’t been kicked out of a single school despite allegedly “starting” fights and always being disruptive

Anger issues for daaaaaayyyyss

He has ear piercings, nose piercings tongue piercings, you name it, he’s got it.

Also has a couple tattoos which are awesome

He has somehow got in a group with people from different teenage cultures and will gladly die for them. He even brings lil babey nerd into the group and yay they’re all happier!!

Can and will debate about anything and everything, which is really fun

Virgil Storm-

The embodiment of not only all knowledge in the world, but the panicked thoughts of swear words repeating

He didn’t really care if he wore glasses or contacts, but found glasses more manageable and has a giant pair he pushes up constantly

See tol boi Logan? Well I present smol boi Virgil. He was just barely the average height, and literally had noodle arms

As a kid, he once almost failed a class because he thought learning would be boring, and therefore didn’t try. When he realized he was about to flunk, he studied hard and found the stuff he was learning... interesting?? And he remembered it?? Then he started doing the same for all his classes and wow learning was incredible!! There was so much to learn and see and do and mark his words he was going to learn it all!

After he started getting bullied for being smart and weak, he wore makeup so nobody saw the bruises. If nobody knew, nobody would bother him, so he could read for longer!

Not really used to people caring about him, so it was a big shock when this big punk came out of nowhere to help him out, and then let him hang out with his ragtag group, filled with more caring people.

He also didn’t really talk a lot at first, because he has a really bad habit of info-dumping or ranting, and nobody wanted to hear what he knew. Then one day at lunch, Patton asked him why the periodic table of elements was arranged the way it was, and what was supposed to be a small answer became an info-dumping session, and when he snapped out of it, he realized how everyone at the table was staring at him in shock. Apparently they didn’t know he could talk so much, so they’ve made it their mission to try and trigger sessions like that because Virgil seemed really happy when he did it

Also when he reads, he has a habit of either not hearing what’s happening around him at all, or having a conversation without realizing. (Not only have the others found this as a good way to trigger a rant, but also Roman quotes musicals and plays and sees if Virgil finishes it so he knows how many Virgil knows of)

Janus Smith-

Snek emo boyo

Wears an unholy amount of makeup and black clothes

Suicide jokes baaaaaabyyyy

He sometimes wears a symbol of a two headed snake, and when asked about it, gives an answer completely unrelated to it

Sometimes, he wears colorful clothes to trigger other emos or to throw everybody off

Beneath all the emo-ness, sarcasm, suicidal tendencies and black, he was a gentle, kind soul

And even further beneath that was a giant asshole

Patton Hart-

Skirts and dresses? Yes. Pastel colors? Yes. Floral print? THOSE WERE TO DIE FOR!!

A fashionista inside and out

Tried to wear boy clothing once. That is a day that shall not be named nor referenced, as it was traumatizing for all involved

Big round glasses, because those go with everything! (He even has versions of his glasses with colored lenses because those were so pretty!!)

Freckles on his nose, and as cute as they were, he will not hesitate to cover them in makeup if they didn’t fit with the outfit for the day

No, he is not a girl, and would appreciate if guys stopped mistaking him for one

Sweet and lovable, but he can and will kill a bitch with his heels if you insult or hurt anyone in his crew, including himself because he mattered

Speaking of his crew, he tries real hard not to help them with their horrible fashion tastes. Logan? Did everything need to be ripped and have bold statements on them? Janus? Beautiful face even with heterochromia and virtilago, but he keeps covering it up with tacky, horribly applied makeup that was ONLY BLACK. And don’t even get him started on when he wore colors!! What is this, a Disney Channel movie? Roman sometimes wore old costumes from school productions he did, which no. Remus was relatively fine, EXCEPT HE WORE THE SAME THING EVERYDAY AND DIDN’T TAKE IT OFF UNTIL THE WEEKEND, WHICH SMELLED HORRIBLE, MIND YOU. Virgil only wore jackets and jeans, and by far drove Patton the least insane with fashion, but the jacket he wore was black, torn up, oversized, and the worst thing, PLAID (he was planning on replacing it, secretly)

Does he cry?? No one knows

Roman Royal-

DISNEY AND THEATER KID, LET’S GO

Quotes from many different things, and bursts out into song randomly

“Not to be gay, but...”

Does many things in theater from playing a part to running around on backstage. He is theater god.

Sometimes he wears costumes from old productions (the ones in a more modern setting though. He’s not gay enough to walk around the halls in a prince outfit. He only does that at home)

Can’t fight for the life of him, but he can sure gossip

Way too loud, but can you blame him?

Remus Royal-

“I am but a mere jock, making fun of my fellow jocks and basically beating them up, being a delinquent but seen as a hero.” “I only asked what your favorite color was.” “Oh. Green.”

Acts as childish as you’d expect

Signs up for any and all sports no matter what

As much as he loves being an idiot with his fellow sports players, he much rather prefers hanging out with the group of misfits purely because they can all be themselves without judgement (he stands corrected. Apparently it was weird when he triggered Virgil into explaining the sex of unicorns and penguins)

Weird ass nicknames for his friendos on his phone. Roman was Ronbow, Janus was Kill or be Killed, Patton was Stabby-Feet, Logan was Propagayda, and Virgil was Answerkey

Dabs

THE HOUSE IS ON FIRE, WHY DID WE LEAVE REMUS TO COOK OH GOD OH NO HE TRIED COOKING ONE OF ROMAN’S PROPS WITH PATTON’S MINI PINK SKIRT AND OH SHIT OH FUCK VIRGIL’S ON FIRE SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT (this was an actual event, and Remus got the fury of Roman for charring his favorite sword, Patton for ruining his skirt, Logan for somehow setting the nerd on fire, had to deal with Virgil being nonverbal for three weeks thanks to the trauma, and a Janus who recorded the entire event without showing a single emotion)

#sanders sides #virgil sanders #logan sanders #thomas sanders #roman sanders #patton sanders #remus sanders #janus sanders #sanders sides au #analogical #creativitwins #tw cursing #tw mentions of fire #tw bullying #mix matched au

[qqueenofhades]

Could you expand a bit on the "death of expertise"? It's something I think about A LOT as an artist, because there are so many problems with people who think it isn't a real job, and the severe undercutting of prices that happens because people think hobbyists and professionals are the same. At the same time, I also really want people to feel free to be able to make art if they want, with no gatekeeping or elitism, and I usually spin myself in circles mentally thinking about it. So.

I have been secretly hoping someone would ask this question, nonny. Bless you. I have a lot (a LOT) of thoughts on this topic, which I will try to keep somewhat concise and presented in a semi-organized fashion, but yes.

I can mostly speak about this in regard to academia, especially the bad, bad, BAD takes in my field (history) that have dominated the news in recent weeks and which constitute most of the recent posts on my blog. (I know, I know, Old Man Yells At Cloud when attempting to educate the internet on actual history, but I gotta do SOMETHING.) But this isn’t a new phenemenon, and is linked to the avalanche of “fake news” that we’ve all heard about and experienced in the last few years, especially in the run-up and then after the election of You Know Who, who has made fake news his personal brand (if not in the way he thinks). It also has to do with the way Americans persistently misunderstand the concept of free speech as “I should be able to say whatever I want and nobody can correct or criticize me,” which ties into the poisonous extreme-libertarian ethos of “I can do what I want with no regard for others and nobody can correct me,” which has seeped its way into the American mainstream and is basically the center of the modern Republican party. (Basically: all for me, all the time, and caring about others is a weak liberal pussy thing to do.)

This, however, is not just an issue of partisan politics, because the left is just as guilty, even if its efforts take a different shape. One of the reason I got so utterly exasperated with strident online leftists, especially around primary season and the hardcore breed of Bernie Bros, is just that they don’t do anything except shout loud and incorrect information on the internet (and then transmogrify that into a twisted ideology of moral purity which makes a sin out of actually voting for a flawed candidate, even if the alternative is Donald Goddamn Trump). I can’t count how many people from both sides of the right/left divide get their political information from like-minded people on social media, and never bother to experience or verify or venture outside their comforting bubbles that will only provide them with “facts” that they already know. Social media has done a lot of good things, sure, but it’s also made it unprecedently easy to just say whatever insane bullshit you want, have it go viral, and then have you treated as an authority on the topic or someone whose voice “has to be included” out of some absurd principle of both-siderism. This is also a tenet of the mainstream corporate media: “both sides” have to be included, to create the illusion of “objectivity,” and to keep the largest number of paying subscribers happy. (Yes, of course this has deep, deep roots in the collapse of late-stage capitalism.) Even if one side is absolutely batshit crazy, the rules of this distorted social contract stipulate that their proposals and their flaws have to be treated as equal with the others, and if you point out that they are batshit crazy, you have to qualify with some criticism of the other side.

This is where you get white people posting “Neo-Nazis and Black Lives Matter are the same!!!1” on facebook. They are a) often racist, let’s be real, and b) have been force-fed a constant narrative where Both Sides Are Equally Bad. Even if one is a historical system of violent oppression that has made a good go at total racial and ethnic genocide and rests on hatred, and the other is the response to not just that but the centuries of systemic and small-scale racism that has been built up every day, the white people of the world insist on treating them as morally equivalent (related to a superior notion that Violence is Always Bad, which.... uh... have you even seen constant and overwhelming state-sponsored violence the West dishes out? But it’s only bad when the other side does it. Especially if those people can be at all labeled “fanatics.”)

I have complained many, many times, and will probably complain many times more, about how hard it is to deconstruct people’s absolutely ingrained ideas of history and the past. History is a very fragile thing; it’s really only equivalent to the length of a human lifespan, and sometimes not even that. It’s what people want to remember and what is convenient for them to remember, which is why we still have some living Holocaust survivors and yet a growing movement of Holocaust denial, among other extremist conspiracy theories (9/11, Sandy Hook, chemtrails, flat-earthing, etc etc). There is likewise no organized effort to teach honest history in Western public schools, not least since the West likes its self-appointed role as guardians of freedom and liberty and democracy in the world and doesn’t really want anyone digging into all that messy slavery and genocide and imperialism and colonialism business. As a result, you have deliberately under- or un-educated citizens, who have had a couple of courses on American/British/etc history in grade school focusing on the greatest-hit reel, and all from an overwhelmingly triumphalist white perspective. You have to like history, from what you get out of it in public school, to want to go on to study it as a career, while knowing that there are few jobs available, universities are cutting or shuttering humanities departments, and you’ll never make much money. There is... not a whole lot of outside incentive there.

I’ve written before about how the humanities are always the first targeted, and the first defunded, and the first to be labeled as “worthless degrees,” because a) they are less valuable to late-stage capitalism and its emphasis on Material Production, and b) they often focus on teaching students the critical thinking skills that critique and challenge that dominant system. There’s a reason that there is a stereotype of artists as social revolutionaries: they have often taken a look around, gone, “Hey, what the hell is this?” and tried to do something about it, because the creative and free-thinking impulse helps to cultivate the tools necessary to question what has become received and dominant wisdom. Of course, that can then be taken too far into the “I’ll create my own reality and reject absolutely everything that doesn’t fit that narrative,” and we end up at something like the current death of expertise.

This year is particularly fertile for these kinds of misinformation efforts: a plague without a vaccine or a known cure, an election year in a turbulently polarized country, race unrest in a deeply racist country spreading to other racist countries around the world and the challenging of a particularly important system (white supremacy), etc etc. People are scared and defensive and reactive, and in that case, they’re especially less motivated to challenge or want to encounter information that scares them. They need their pre-set beliefs to comfort them or provide steadiness in a rocky and uncertain world, and (thanks once again to social media) it’s easy to launch blistering ad hominem attacks on people who disagree with you, who are categorized as a faceless evil mass and who you will never have to meet or negotiate with in real life. This is the environment in which all the world’s distinguished scientists, who have spent decades studying infectious diseases, have to fight for airtime and authority (and often lose) over random conspiracy theorists who make a YouTube video. The public has been trained to see them as “both the same” and then accept which side they like the best, regardless of actual factual or real-world qualifications. They just assume the maniac on YouTube is just as trustworthy as the scientists with PhDs from real universities.

Obviously, academia is racist, elitist, classist, sexist, on and on. Most human institutions are. But training people to see all academics as the enemy is not the answer. You’ve seen the Online Left (tm) also do this constantly, where they attack “the establishment” for never talking about anything, or academics for supposedly erasing and covering up all of non-white history, while apparently never bothering to open a book or familiarize themselves with a single piece of research that actual historians are working on. You may have noticed that historians have been leading the charge against the “don’t erase history!!!1″ defenders of racist monuments, and explaining in stinging detail exactly why this is neither preserving history or being truthful about it. Tumblr likes to confuse the mechanism that has created the history and the people who are studying and analyzing that history, and lump them together as one mass of Evil And Lying To You. Academics are here because we want to critically examine the world and tell you things about it that our nonsense system has required years and years of effort, thousands of dollars in tuition, and other gatekeeping barriers to learn. You can just ask one of us. We’re here, we usually love to talk, and we’re a lot cheaper. I think that’s pretty cool.

As a historian, I have been trained in a certain skill set: finding, reading, analyzing, using, and criticizing primary sources, ditto for secondary sources, academic form and style, technical skills like languages, paleography, presentation, familiarity with the professional mechanisms for reviewing and sharing work (journals, conferences, peer review, etc), and how to assemble this all into an extended piece of work and to use it in conversation with other historians. That means my expertise in history outweighs some rando who rolls up with an unsourced or misleading Twitter thread. If a professor has been handed a carefully crafted essay and then a piece of paper scribbled with crayon, she is not obliged to treat them as essentially the same or having the same critical weight, even if the essay has flaws. One has made an effort to follow the rules of the game, and the other is... well, I did read a few like that when teaching undergraduates. They did not get the same grade.

This also means that my expertise is not universal. I might know something about adjacent subjects that I’ve also studied, like political science or English or whatever, but someone who is a career academic with a degree directly in that field will know more than me. I should listen to them, even if I should retain my independent ability and critical thinking skillset. And I definitely should not be listened to over people whose field of expertise is in a completely different realm. Take the recent rocket launch, for example. I’m guessing that nobody thought some bum who walked in off the street to Kennedy Space Center should be listened to in preference of the actual scientists with degrees and experience at NASA and knowledge of math and orbital mechanics and whatever else you need to get a rocket into orbit. I definitely can’t speak on that and I wouldn’t do it anyway, so it’s frustrating to see it happen with history. Everybody “knows” things about history that inevitably turn out to be wildly wrong, and seem to assume that they can do the same kind of job or state their conclusions with just as much authority. (Nobody seems to listen to the scientists on global warming or coronavirus either, because their information is actively inconvenient for our entrenched way of life and people don’t want to change.) Once again, my point here is not to be a snobbish elitist looking down at The Little People, but to remark that if there’s someone in a field who has, you know, actually studied that subject and is speaking from that place of authority, maybe we can do better than “well, I saw a YouTube video and liked it better, so there.” (Americans hate authority and don’t trust smart people, which  is a related problem and goes back far beyond Trump, but there you are.)

As for art: it’s funny how people devalue it constantly until they need it to survive. Ask anyone how they spent their time in lockdown. Did they listen to music? Did they watch movies or TV? Did they read a book? Did they look at photography or pictures? Did they try to learn a skill, like drawing or writing or painting, and realize it was hard? Did they have a preference for the art that was better, more professionally produced, had more awareness of the rules of its craft, and therefore was more enjoyable to consume? If anyone wants to tell anyone that art is worthless, I invite you to challenge them on the spot to go without all of the above items during the (inevitable, at this rate) second coronavirus lockdown. No music. No films. No books. Not even a video or a meme or anything else that has been made for fun, for creativity, or anything outside the basic demands of Compensated Economic Production. It’s then that you’ll discover that, just as with the underpaid essential workers who suffered the most, we know these jobs need to get done. We just still don’t want to pay anyone fairly for doing them, due to our twisted late-capitalist idea of “value.”

Anyway, since this has gotten long enough and I should probably wrap up: as you say, the difference between “professional” and “hobbyist” has been almost completely erased, so that people think the opinion of one is as good as the other, or in your case, that the hobbyist should present their work for free or refuse to be seen as a professional entitled to fair compensation for their skill. That has larger and more insidious effects in a global marketplace of ideas that has been almost entirely reduced to who can say their opinion the loudest to the largest group of people. I don’t know how to solve this problem, but at least I can try to point it out and to avoid being part of it, and to recognize where I need to speak and where I need to shut up. My job, and that of every single white person in America right now, is to shut up and let black people (and Native people, and Latinx people, and Muslim people, and etc...) tell me what it’s really like to live here with that identity. I have obviously done a ton of research on the subject and consider myself reasonably educated, but here’s the thing: my expertise still doesn’t outweigh theirs, no matter what degrees they have or don’t have. I then am required to boost their ideas, views, experiences, and needs, rather than writing them over or erasing them, and to try to explain to people how the roots of these ideas interlock and interact where I can. That is -- hopefully -- putting my history expertise to use in a good way to support what they’re saying, rather than silence it. I try, at any rate, and I am constantly conscious of learning to do better.

I hope that was helpful for you. Thanks for letting me talk about it.

#history #long post #anonymous #ask

[phantomphangphucker]

Ectober week Darkness/Poison - Sinners Are We Chap.2: The Prince Of Poisoned Hope And The One Lurking In The Shadows

Even monsters can make a family. That’s no reason for the world to get its hopes up though.

History books will always show you how one simple change can change everything. Alter the course of History forever. And while that was true, today’s history books didn’t have much to tell. The universe had fallen to ruin in a matter of years after all. There were some who would say that this was the best possible outcome though. Even wrote books on it. That if it had been just one or the other, instead of the two of them together, that there wouldn’t be a universe left standing. Because together they changed one another, gave each other something other than obliterating things to focus on, and a heightened interest in the future.

The universe watched those two walk out on stage vengeful and angry, sadistic and carefree. One acting out of a twisted version of retribution and spite, the other who was more just a destructive force of nature. And as their show went on, one became more uncaring and unbothered by her past and the other grew even fonder of the idea of ‘irony’. The two former arch enemies in the eyes of anyone who knew of how they were before, now coupled together and encouraging each other in different was.

Their wedding was a Zone-wide and universe-wide celebration. Not because anyone was happy for them, no, because not celebrating might get you killed. Those two were incredibly flaky over who they would and wouldn’t kill, maim, or torture now-a-day’s. But it was also officially a holiday. Because the king and queen were to be wed.

The King Of Ghosts and the Queen Of Mortals. And though the latter hadn’t actually been a thing until her, no one was about to oppose. Lest she sic one of her metal machines on you or came after you herself. If she was in a mood, maybe he would come after you instead. Which while promising a likely quicker death, also would likely get everyone around you killed or maimed too.

The living were overall more fearful of her but would rather suffer at her hand than his. Something similar happened with the dead. A ghost didn’t care much about the collateral around them, and loved chaos. So while they feared him more, they’d take his destructiveness over her torture any day. And arguably, when it came down to it? They fulfilled their conquered roles well. When he wasn’t running amok destroying areas of Zone, the place flourished and they had a leader that was feared. That meant a lot to those of the dead. Being feared was their bread and butter. And the places he destroyed, if he left them alone long enough, reformed better than before. Like a fire had raged through it and the new growth was coming back stronger. Similar went for her, her existence alone deterred crime and planets simply couldn’t survive without other planets help due to all the destruction and loss. The living were more connected than ever and better behaved. And the living and dead hardly harmed each other anymore, because doing so was a great way to get the two tyrants' attention. Which was very seldom a good thing.

Of course there were plenty who were genuinely loyal and fond of the pair. Often working as assassins, knights, or subordinate rulers under them. In fact, anyone with large amounts of power or sway could reasonably be considered at the very least sympathisers. Not that anyone could do anything about that. Most people just busied themselves with survival and enjoying every day as much as they could, it very well could be their last day at the drop of a hat after all. Though everyone paid attention and gaped when the firstborn Gray-Phantom was announced. One Russet Julius Gray-Phantom, the middle name wasn’t recognised for the warning that it accidentally was. Most actually genuinely celebrated because maybe, maybe, this would take up more of their time and attention. Maybe the kid could be a positive influence on them. Be a poison that could dissolve the ice and hatred around their heart and Core. Maybe they’d actually consider their own kids' opinions and wants; they didn’t care about anyone else’s after all.

At the same time though, lords know how fucked up this kid might be or get.

The second-born Gray-Phantom, one Orrin Jasper Gray-Phantom, being announced only four years later gave everyone genuine hope that maybe the two’s focus had genuinely shifted to building a family. That they would stay with their family and exist more in the shadows of the two Realms rather than tormenting them on the forefront. Which could be good or very very bad. The realms could end up with a whole family of violent psychotic monsters. With generations of them. A lineage of brutality. And yet at the same time, both realms had gotten used to the king and queen. The dead didn’t want their king to lose his touch, his fearsomeness; and him destroying things was a reason to socialise with each other more, they might need to stay at another ghosts lair after all. The living worried that crime might increase or that they might start nipping at each other’s throats; she had made the living more inclined to violence and survival of the fittest yet more tight-knit community wise.

Then the elder prince went and ripped a bunch of the living apart limb from limb while laughing like a mad man at thirteen years of age. The boy was an absolute demon child, and his parents had no interest in leashing him. Heck, those two probably enjoyed it. But this incident was also when the Mortal Realm learned halfas were a thing. In suitably dramatic fashion when the human-looking elder prince transformed directly in front of the police force before shooting into the sky cackling. Which was news that spread through the universe at breakneck speed, faster than any poison, both for the oddity of that and the impossibility of that. Plus, gossip surrounding the high royals always stirred up interest. Out of morbid curiosity and pure survival.

At least they knew what the elder prince looked like as a human now, so they wouldn’t be caught so easily by surprise. Which did result in him getting attacked by ghost hunters in human form once, which very noticeably pissed him off... and got the hunters killed. But people understood why they tried, it was a test to see how strong the teen was. Which was to say he was definitely not as strong as his father or as smart as his mother; and he had very little in the way of tenacity. Which was good for them, meant he could be easily deterred; running off to huff like a petulant child.

The younger prince was more of an unknown, an uncertainty. But those that did run into him or spot him from afar said he looked at people like he was judging their worth and made them feel small. Like they were staring into a black smokey void, So he was clearly intelligent. Him leaving an area, especially to ghosts, felt less like he was running off and more like he had decided that the place or person could be useful to him. But for the most part, he stuck to the shadows, or maybe just seldom left Phantom’s Keep. It was quite possible he hung around in his human form, if he was a halfa too; no one would know after all. Though there were rumours that he went and stopped some war in the Ghost Realm at some point. No one was sure if that meant he had been peaceful or just went and obliterated both sides. The second being more in line with the behaviour of the rest of the family. Regardless, both the living and dead preferred the younger prince. He wasn’t actively dangerous to them and seemed less wild. But considering the king’s and queen’s history, the fact that they had both been heroes and champions for good once hadn’t disappeared into forgotten history; the younger also made them more nervous. Russet’s motives and feelings were obvious, if you saw him you knew he was up to something that would get someone hurt or make him stronger; it was obvious by the time he hit adulthood that he was power-hungry. By twenty, everyone was pretty sure he would have tried to off his parents for the throne if they weren’t in a totally different league than him in the power department. The king and queen seemed to enjoy mocking him for that and were gleeful over him trying to make himself stronger. They viewed that as them trying to push him over the edge, push him even further into violent darkness. At least that distracted the man some.

While Orrin, even at sixteen, was still effectively a mystery. Based on him ageing the same as his brother everyone decided he was definitely a halfa too. For a short while they tried to pin down his mortal form, but even the dead had no luck with that. As a result the amount rumours about him were almost endless. The most popular was that he was a thief and trickster. That he would pop up randomly in houses and lairs, scaring or creeping people out and then something went missing. That might have been born out of the fact that Russet clearly didn’t get his father’s humorous side, so maybe Orrin got all of it.

So one was like a poison that ran around destroying things and causing mayhem; even a couple societal collapses. While the other stuck to the darkness and no one really knew what lurked in that darkness.

And then, the third Gray-Phantom was born. A little girl they named Dove Jay Gray-Phantom. Just like her brothers, she was born looking like a six-year-old and she caused a stir. Because she was beautiful. Many of the more poetic types likened her to a rose blooming in a field of thorns. Of course, roses had thorns of their own; but she literally looked like the feeling of innocence. The living were as relieved as they were willing to let themselves feel when it came to the high royal family, but the dead viewed her as a possible weakness. And so they went to ‘test’ her, or more accurately ‘attack her’ while the king and queen were busy dealing with their handful elder son.

But that’s when Orrin’s protective side came out and the realms got to see his thorns for the first time. Russet lashed his thorns around like an animal full of pride, but when Orrin’s burst out from the shadows everyone immediately knew who the stronger bother was. He completely annihilated the ghosts that went after Dove with a straight face and seemingly without effort. Dove, meanwhile, seemed clueless and reportedly hummed softly the whole time.

The younger prince and princess weren’t seen for a while after that, and the elder prince seemed more volatile than normal. It could be because Dove hadn’t protected herself, which for a Gray-Phantom was absolutely unacceptable. They were supposed to be God’s amongst men whose reach seeped into every facet of the universe after all. And the elder brother was likely foaming at the mouth over being shown up by the younger. Most of the realms honestly hoped that maybe the adorable princess would change things, doubtful. But images mysteriously leaked of her wielding a sword with puffed out cheeks inspired more hope than worry.

#ectober #ectober week #ectober week 2020 #danny phantom #phandom #dan phantom #valerie gray #dark gray #implied/referenced murder #ghost king Dan #mortal queen Valerie #villain! Valerie #altrernate tue #fan fic #phan phic #my writing #have a fic suck my dick #phantomphangphucker #me taking the prompt and stretching it as far as it will go

[chickensarentcheap]

Best Part of Me -Chapter 88

Warnings: none

Tagging: @tragiclyhip, @innerpaperexpertcloud, @c-a-v-a-l-r-y, @alievans007

The final attempt at sleep had been successful. Although the road ahead of him is destined to be long and extremely difficult -and no doubt agonizing- his brief moment of wakefulness had done wonders to life Esme’s spirits. That chance to speak to him; to see him open his eyes and know -with one hundred percent certainty- that he was able to acknowledge her. It wasn’t a drug induced incoherent rambling or hallucination. He actually saw her and was able to engage; giving appropriate responses and showing concern for her and the baby. Able to express how he was feeling and that telling her he loved her. No one could ever possibly understand how just incredible that small moment was, or what an enormous impact it had on her state of mind. She knows it won’t be easy. There will be weeks, even months, of healing; tremendous pain and more hard times than easy ones. A full recovery could take as long as a couple of years; countless rounds of physical rehab will be needed and most likely therapy for mental health and addiction issues.  But he’s already shown just how tenacious and strong he actually is; his will to live a lot more powerful than the agony he’s experiencing. With so much to live for, his desire to be with his family again is his main driving force, and she knows he’ll be willing to do whatever it takes to get back on his feet again.

Nathan may have been able to break his body, but he hadn’t made a dent in his spirit.

The burden she’s been carrying -the fear, worry, and uncertainty- had been lessened, and she’d been able to drift off; both body and mind allowing her to rest. So soundly in fact, that she’d only briefly stirred in the wee hours of the morning when Julie had come in while on her rounds. Merely lifting her head from the pillow; quietly observing as the nurse switched empty IV and medicine bags with full ones. Then she’d simply rolled over, pulled the blankets over her head, and easily drifted off.

Her sleep once again had been filled with dreams of the past. Millie’s first steps and how ecstatic and proud Tyler had been; never getting to experience many of Austin’s milestones because of deployments. How tearful he’d been the morning he’d walked into her room and Millie -who’d  been standing up in her crib, excitedly bouncing up and down at the mere sight of him- had called him ‘daddy’ for the very first time.  And the way he’d broken down in the delivery room when the twins had been born -even harder than he had when his daughter came into the world- and the nurse had given him TJ and said “Here’s your son”.   He’d lost his first, and getting that moment again -a baby boy presented to him- had profoundly affected him  A man that rightfully shouldn’t even have been alive. Who’d been given a second chance and at times didn’t feel as if he deserved it. There are still times he thinks that way. When the demons of the past resurface and play havoc on his brain; convincing him that the mistakes of a younger man and the amount of blood on his hands has turned him into a monster. It’s the nightmare of living with mental health issues and PTSD; those dark moments where he questions his mere existence and openly states that he doesn’t deserve the life he has now; a wife and children that love and accept him unconditionally.  

It’s hard for people to understand. How a man that is so big and so strong -and often intimidating- can have those kinds of thoughts and vulnerable moments. But they don’t know everything that he’s battled. His childhood is one of his best kept secrets; only her and Koen know the full extent of his father’s behaviour, the abuse inflicted, and the long term damage it has caused. It’s not something he readily talks about; even with her.  That toxic masculinity still gets the better of him at times. His father’s attempts at beating into him that a man -a REAL MAN- doesn’t show emotion; it means that he’s weak and there’s nothing more pathetic than being weak. And she’s tried to break him of it; years spent assuring him that he isn’t a weak man.  A weak man would have given up in that storage facility. In the same way he would have given up on the Sultana Kamal Bridge seven years ago.  And he certainly never would have survived the nightmare of his upbringing. Nor would he be so determined to be a better man; the kind of husband and father that a wife and kids can brag about and proud of. Who never have to live in fear of him ; cowering every time he raises his voice or even comes too close to them. Who know -beyond the shadow of a doubt- how much he loves him.

Tyler Rake is anything BUT weak. And he’d shown that the night before.  Somehow finding a way to battle his way through this thick haze of multiple medications; gathering the strength to not only open his eyes, but actually think coherently and communicate. He was right. He DOES do whatever he wants.

When she finally wakes, it’s to the patter of rain against the window and the sounds of hospital life trickling through the half open door. Doctors being paged, the shrill ring of patients’ using their call buttons to summon for help, the loud rattle of gurneys being pushed through the halls. It’s a harsh reminder of her current situation; stuck in the ICU of a private hospital in Dhaka, thousands of miles away from her children and the comforts and security of her own home.  She misses it. The sound and the smell of the ocean. The morning breeze and sunshine as she stands out on the back deck enjoying that first cup of tea, watching her husband as he helps Millie and the twins search -and dig, at times- for shells, rocks, and beach glass. Often wondering who is enjoying the quality time more; father or children. The  dinners cooked on an open fire down by the water; the smiles brought to their faces -and that unconditional love and immense pride in his eyes- as they watch their children play and listen to those little voices and musical giggles floating on the air. And those strong, protective arms wrapped around her from behind as she sits between his legs. Her head resting against his chest as they quietly marvel at the sky; painted vivid shades of orange and pink as the sun sets.  

It’s a life she had never even dared to dream about; a beautiful home in an even more even more beautiful place,  amazing children and a husband that is faithful and loyal and only has eyes for her.  All those things that she’d come to believe SHE didn’t deserve and had long ago given up on finding. How poetic in a way; two broken people coming together to make a slightly dented whole.

Sighing heavily, she rolls from side to back; eyes closed as she stretches and yawns The morning sickness has returned. With a vengeance. More than likely made worse by lack of food and the stress and worry that have accompanied the last twenty four hours. When she manages to quell the threatening nausea and brief spell of dizziness, she opens her eyes and sits up, finding a small paper bag sitting on the extra pillow beside her; name written on the front of it in black marker. And the contents bring the first genuine smile since yesterday morning; aside from Tyler’s brief period of consciousness. A bottle of prenatal vitamins, a small carton of chocolate milk, and an enormous blueberry muffin. Accompanied by a handwritten note from Julie; asking Esme to promise she’ll look after herself AND the baby, assurance that she’ll be back on in the evening, and her home phone number. The latter being offered as not only a ‘helpline’ if she feels overwhelmed and scared and needs someone to vent and cry to, but so she can give the nurse a list of some of her favorite foods. Julie vowing to bring a selection when she clocks in for her shift. It’s refreshing; having someone WANT to take care of her in that motherly fashion. Especially when her own has been anything but.

She shoves her feet into her sandals and climbs off the bed; returning  it to its couch form. “Hey baby,” she greets as she stands at the side of Tyler’s bed; combing her fingers through his hair and pressing her lips to his temple. “Good morning.  I hope you slept god. You didn’t snore, I know that much. That’s a first, huh? Me not complaining about your snoring? Must have been a really good sleep for you to be THAT quiet. You deserve it; that kind of sleep. Your face looks a little better, I think. Not as swollen. Pretty bruised though. And you’re going to have a couple wicked scars at the end of this.”

Her fingers gently touch the stitches below and above his eye.

“You’d probably joke about how it balances your face out; the right catching up with the left in the scar department.  I think they’re going to make you even sexier. Which should be illegal, if you ask me. One man being that sexy?  No wonder you’re a DILF. The thirsty ladies may drive me crazy, but I can’t really blame them. Right now I’m kind of mad at you though. I am so nauseous. And I swear, the bump is even bigger this morning...look…”   she pushes her fingers through his, then draws their joined hands through the safety railing and places them on her stomach.  “...bigger, right? You can’t tell me this is normal. None of the other ones were this size so soon. Not even Declan, and he was over ten pounds when he was born. And you better not be thinking multiples; one is all we can handle right about now.  Let’s not bite off more than we can chew, alright? Six is more than enough. And speaking of babies, I’m going to ask Ovi to bring Addie here. She’s tiny still, Tyler. She shouldn’t be away from us this long. Especially me. She needs to be with her momma. And I think it would do you some good, too; having at least one of them here. So that’s my decision and you’re just  going to have to live with it.”

She moves his hand back inside the confines of the bed, gently setting it on the mattress

“I love you,” she says, and presses a kiss to the corner of his mouth. “You keep sleeping, okay? And I hope if you’re dreaming, it’s good things for a change.”

****

She gives a small start when she exits the bathroom and finds Koen sitting in the bedside chair. Sipping from a take out cup of coffee and freshly shaven;  his face bearing its own fair share of bruises and a handful of  butterfly bandages keeping small, superficial wounds closed.

“Morning, sunshine!” He cheerfully greets, and nods to the cup of tea and a bag of fast food breakfast sitting on the window ledge. “I finally get to see you in your sexy jammies.”

Esme gives a derisive snort. “You DO have issues if you find sweatpants and an oversized shirt sexy,” she says as she journeys over to the window “I was going to give you shit for scaring the crap out of me, but seeing as you come bearing gifts, I’ll let it slide.”  She peers into the bag, a grin tugging at her lips. “Either it was just a lucky guess, or you somehow know that when I’m pregnant, I always crave breakfast burritos.”

“There’s a lot I know about you. Someone talks about you. All the time.  Mostly about shit I don’t need to know.”

“Well I’m glad you listened. Because this is a very nice surprise. Thank you,” she lays a hand on his shoulder and presses a kiss to his cheek. “And what’s up with this?” She lightly taps a hand against the side of his face. “All cleaned up. Smooth like a baby’s bum.”

“I thought there might be some hot nurses walking around. Want to put my best foot forward. Maybe you can hook me up; put in a good word for me.”

“Why would you want to hook with someone here? You’ll be going home soon.”

“Exactly.”

“Ewww…” she grimaces. “...I don’t need to know that you’re a ‘pump and dump’.”

“Considering the things I’ve had to hear from you and him?”  Koen nods in Tyler’s direction. “What I said is tame. I’ve actually had to listen to you two….”

“I thought you were moving on from random hookups?”  Esme remarks, and she perches on the arm of his chair and delves into one of the burritos. “I thought you were getting too old for that shit?”

“Excuse me, who are you calling old?”

“I thought Tyler was rubbing off on you. That he was some sort of inspiration to you and Rata; convincing you two it was time to stop sowing your wild oats and settle down once and for all.  Didn’t you say it gave you hope? That if...and I quote…’someone can put up with the likes of him, that’s proof there IS someone out there for everyone’.”

“I did say that.”

“So what gives? Why are you looking for a random? You deserve more than that”

“Well if he was awake and could tell me where to find another one of you, I’d be all set.”

“Sorry. I’m limited edition. And I’ve already been claimed. A couple breakfast burritos just aren’t enough to make me divorce my husband and run away with you. It definitely takes more than that.”

“I knew I should have gotten you hash browns too.”

“That would have done it! Boy, did you ever blow that.  I would have for sure ran away with you. Right this very second.”

“You know, as much as I enjoy our little banter, I don’t think I could handle you.”

“Oh, you definitely couldn’t.  It takes a special breed of man, believe me. And I’m serious; aren’t you tired of NOT having someone to call your own? Someone to go home to at the end of the day? Someone that is your ‘be and end all’? Your ‘ride or die’?. You deserve to be happy. I WANT you to be happy.”

“I think Tyler took all the happy and didn’t leave any for anyone else.”

“When we get home, I am finding someone for you. I don’t care what it takes; I will put you on every dating site out there.”

“What about your sister? Or step sister. Whatever she is.”

“Riley? Are you serious? She’s twenty three!”

“And?”

“And you’re thirty years older than she is!”

“How old do you think I am?”

“I know you’re eight years older than Tyler. He’s almost forty two. So I lied; you’re only twenty seven years old than she is.”

“And?”

“And that’s fucking disturbing!”

Koen shrugs. “She’s cute”

“She is. You know who else finds her cute? Women. Who she is into. And she’s not a switch hitter.”

“Doesn’t take after her older sister, huh?”

Esme frowns. “He told you THAT, too?”

“He’s told me a lot of things, sunshine. You forget; he’s a chatty drunk. Until he’s a depressed and weepy drunk, that is.”

“There are many sides to him you don’t get to see. Sober sides. And don’t worry; my sister isn’t in contention, but I WILL find someone for you.   And speaking of someone, where’s your sidekick?”

“He saw something downstairs he liked.”

“Really…” she playfully wriggles her eyebrows. “...blond or brunette?”

“Something in the gift shop. For the baby.”

“He knows?”

“EVERYONE knows.”

“Yaz has a big mouth,” Esme grumbles. “We weren’t going to tell anyone until we got home and found how far along I am. It’s what Tyler and I wanted.”

“I could gather a guess. About how far.”

“Sure you could,” she mutters. “And why do you keep looking at me like that? Why do you keep staring at my crotch?”

“I’m looking at your stomach. Where’d that come from?”

“It’s been there. I’ve just been hiding it because no one was supposed to know! Now that everyone does,  I guess I don’t have to wear baggy clothes anymore.  And it’s big, right? The bump? Bigger than any of the others?”

“How should I know? I only saw you pregnant with Millie and Addie. Never saw  you with any of the boys.”

“It’s never been like this so soon! How big IS this baby?”

“Look at the size of the kid’s father. Maybe it’s taking after him. Or maybe there’s more than one.”

“Why would you do that? Why would you think it? Don’t put that out into the universe. There’s just one. That’s it. That will make it six. A nice even number.”

“Number six must be pretty damn big then.”

“You know what? You’re off my Christmas card list. There’s no way we’re running away together. You totally shit the bed. No second chances for you.

“What if I bring you chocolate?”

“Not even then. You just had to jinx the entire thing.”

Koen gives an over dramatic pout.

“Buddy, I have seen better pouts on a much bigger man. That won’t work on me. You have nothing on Tyler’s pout.”

“He doesn’t pout.”

“He sure as shit does. I’m going to prove it one day. I’m going to catch him doing it and take a picture. Then I’ll have the evidence. Tanner has the EXACT same pout; he mostly does it when he’s sleeping.”

“Speaking of pictures, I’ve got a little something for ya.”   Koen reaches into the side pocket  of his cargo pants, pulling out his cell and then thumbing through the gallery; choosing the image he wants and offering the phone to her. “Thought it would make you smile. The world’s a shitty place when you don’t. You got yourself a pretty nice smile.”

“You’ve been taking ass kissing lessons from the best, haven’t you,” she chides, then pops the last of her breakfast into her mouth and wipes her hands on her thighs. “Oh...my...god…”  she breathes, and almost squeals in delight at the sight before her. Her husband long before the hardness and weariness brought on by his time in the military, substance abuse issues, and the dangers of the job. Before all of those demons took hold of him and he’d yet to go under a tattoo artist’s needle and no scars marred his body.  Tall and lean; broad shouldered and bearing the start of the strong and solid physique of a soldier. A brush cut and a smooth, clean face; the smile -genuine and pure- making his eyes crinkle and sparkle.

“Back when he couldn’t even grow a proper beard yet,” Koen muses. “When he was still wet behind the ears. Nothing hard ass about that bloke in the picture, is there.”

“Where did you get this?” Esme can’t explain it; the tug at her heart and the emotion choking at her and the tears that well in her eyes. There’s something so surreal about it; seeing the person you love long before a hard and unpredictable life got a hold of them.

“Found a box of old pictures when I was going through some stuff back home. Meant to show it to him, but never got around to it. You mentioned before that you’ve never seen what he looked like before...well...before all of this.”

“I’ve only ever ever seen one picture of him. When he was five; with his mom on his first day of kindergarten.  He doesn’t have any other ones; he says it’s not worth the grief he’ll get if he asks his dad if he has any.   This is…I don’t know...it’s amazing. You have no idea what this means to me; seeing this. ESPECIALLY right now. This is everything. You can’t possibly understand what this does for me.”

“I think I do. I know how you feel about him. That you’re just as much a fool in love as he is.”

“I certainly am,” she smiles. “How old is he here?”

“Nineteen. Hadn’t been out of basic long; a couple weeks maybe. When he was a cocky little shit and as green as fresh baby shit.  Cute, ain’t he?”

“Very cute. It’s weird seeing him like this. I’ve only seen MY Tyler. The one I’ve spent seven years with.  I’ve never seen THIS Tyler. I know that sounds strange.”

“I’ve heard stranger.”

“Fourteen year old me would have had a huge crush on him.”

“What was fourteen year old Esme like?”

“Awkward. Geeky. Short as fuck and chubby.  I had braces and jet black hair and I dressed like a goth. Big old Doc Marten boots that went up to my knees and everything.”

“Now THAT I’d like to see.”

“I don’t even have pictures of ME when I was that young. Tyler’s never seen old photos of me, either. I think the youngest he’s ever seen me was when I was twenty-three and just got into the Corps.  It’s what happens; when your family is toxic and you’d rather not deal with them. Can you send this to me? I’d  love to have this. And I’d love to show the kids. Especially Millie. She’d like to see her daddy when he was young and cute.”

“I’ll send it to ya. And when we get home, I’ll bring that box down and we can go through it. I’m sure there’s more you’d love to have. “

“Thank you.” She can’t hold back the tears. “You have no idea what it means to me. Even just having one picture. And I’m sorry; that I’m a whiny bitch baby. I would like to be able to blame it on the baby and my hormones, but it’s not those things. It’s just me. I’m not exactly having the best twenty four hours. I miss my kids. I hate being so far away from them. Especially Addie. But I can’t leave Tyler here. I just can’t.”

“I could stay,” Koen offers. “He wouldn’t be alone, you know that.”

“And I appreciate it, I do. But I need to be here with him. I didn’t leave him seven years ago, and I’m sure as hell not leaving him now. It’ll be better; when he gets sent to a hospital back home. Closest one is an hour from the house. It’ll be better than.”

“Well I’ll stick around as long as you need me to. Sort of made a promise that I’d take care of ya. I ain’t breaking it.”

“You’re all heart, Koen. You can pretend to be surly and hard ass all you want. I’m onto you.”

“Yeah, well I kind of like that giant, dumb ass bloke you’re married to. And you’re growing on me. So I figure I might as well step up and take his spot and treat like you like the queen you are.”

“You smooth talker,” she teases, ruffling his hair and pressing a kiss to his cheek. “Thank you. For the picture. You really don’t know how grateful I am for it. And thanks for being here; for both of us.”

“Anytime, sunshine.”

“And thank you for being with him yesterday. I could tell he was scared and in pain, and when I think what would have happened if he’d been alone…”

“Well he wasn’t. Alone. So don’t even think about that.”

“Thank you for getting him out of there. At least if he DID die, he wouldn’t have been left there. I don’t think I’d ever get over that; if I had to leave him here. I couldn’t cope with that.”

“Let’s not think about that, yeah? He got through it. He got out of there and it’s only uphill from here.”

“He really thought he was going to die, didn’t he.”

“Honestly? We all thought he was going to die.”

She releases a long, shaky sigh and blinks back tears.  “I’m glad you were there with him. At least if the worst happened, he wouldn’t have been by himself. That is my biggest fear when it comes to the job; that if it DOES happen, he’ll be alone. I don’t know why it bothers me as much as it does. I just don’t want him to be alone...you know...IF…”

“Can’t dwell on stuff like that. You’ll drive yourself insane. Or give yourself gray hair.”

“Bold of you to assume I don’t already HAVE gray hair.”

“I don’t see anything.”

“I appreciate you feeding my ego, but I know you can see it. And believe, every one of my gray hairs has Tyler’s name on them. Maybe TJ too. Go figure; the junior being a TRUE junior.”

“That kid is his dad through and through. Tough on the outside, all heart on the inside. And that Millie…”

“Female version of him.”

“Exactly. It’s fitting if you ask me; him having a girl first and her being just like him. Gonna have his hands full with her.”

“She called last night. Wanting to talk to him. She had a bad dream and he always makes her feel better after a bad dream. Daddy’s the one that chases all the monsters away. She has so much faith in him; she knows he’d never ignore her. She’s already questioning why she can’t get a hold of him. I have to tell them; I can’t keep lying to them. And I’d rather they hear it from me than someone else. They’ll take it better if it comes from me, I think.”

Koen nods in agreement.

“But on the bright side, he had a really good night. An amazing night, actually. He woke up. Twice. Once for the nurse, once for me.”

Koen frowns.

“What?”

“He woke up?”

Esme nods. “The first time, Julie...his night nurse…said he woke up and   wanted to know who the hell she was and that he asked for me. And he even told her he was feeling sick and she gave him some meds for it.”

“Hmm…”

“Second time, he opened his eyes and looked right at me. Told me to not cry. He said he wasn’t in any pain and that he was just tired. And he asked if the baby was okay and he said he loved me. It was amazing; to see him open his eyes and hear his voice.”

“Are you sure? That this happened?”

“What do you mean am I sure? Of course I’m sure. Why wouldn't I be?”

“Thought the doctor said they weren’t going to bring him out sedation for a few days? At least.”

“Julie said it isn’t uncommon; moments of wakefulness and some lucidity.  It’s just sedation, it’s not a medically induced coma  like last time.”

“He actually woke up? After everything he went through during the day? All the surgeries, the amount of meds they’re pushing into him? He opened his eyes and talked to you?”

“That’s  exactly what happened. Why are you questioning it? I wouldn’t lie about this.”

“I’m not saying you’re lying. Maybe you were dreaming. Maybe you were hallucinating from lack of sleep.”

“I wasn’t dreaming and I wasn’t seeing things. He woke up, looked at me, and talked to me. It happened. It was real.”

“Esme, don’t take this the wrong way, but maybe it was wishful thinking on your part and…”

“It happened,” she insists. “I was there. I witnessed it.”

“And I was there in that storage and in that van. I know what kind of shape he was in; I know how close he was to lights out. Permanently. And you’re telling me, after all the injuries, all the surgeries, all the meds, he just woke up? The same day?”

“I know it sounds crazy. And I wouldn’t believe it if someone told me either. But I SAW it. With my own two eyes. And you know how tough he is; how damn stubborn he is.   Does it really surprise you that of all the people who would fight THIS hard, it’s Tyler?  You know him; you know how strong he is.  You know he’d do anything for me and the kids. So is that big of a stretch that he’d wake up like that? Even if it was just to give me some hope?”

Koen sighs.

“He woke up AND he talked to me. And you know what? It was incredible and made me feel better; to know his brain is working and that he’s not giving up. I needed that; some kind of sign that he’s going to be okay And he gave it to me.”

“So why isn’t he awake now?” Koen challenges.

“Maybe he used up all his energy last night and he needs to build it back up again.”

“If he’s got it in him to wake up last night, he should be awake right now.  I’ve got some shit to say to him for scaring me as bad as he did. How come he’s not up now and talking to me?”

“I don’t know. I only know what happened last night. I only know…”

“Maybe I don’t want to talk to you,” Tyler’s voice -weak, groggy, and slightly slurred by the effects of medication- pipes up. “Now shut the fuck up. You’re given me a headache.”

“See!” Esme smiles triumphantly.  “I told you.”

****

When she returns from taking a much needed shower, she finds Rata outside Tyler’s room tightly clutching a gift bag from the shop in the front lobby and pacing at a near frantic rate. It’s odd to see him this way, clearly frazzled and nervous shoulders tense;  chewing on his bottom lip and occasionally stopping and peering into the room. Normally he’s the ‘life of the party’; clueless in an adorable way, always acting far less intelligent than he actually is  just to get a laugh. Possessing an air of confidence without an ounce of cockiness; quick with sarcastic comments and witty comebacks. The ‘uncle’ that always sits at the kids’ tables during Christmas dinner and then helps build lego sets and put together toy car race tracks instead of socializing with the adults.

“Hey you,” she warmly greets, and lays a comforting hand on his back. “You okay?”

He responds by wrapping her in a huge; strong, muscular arms noticeably trembling.

“You alright?” Esme asks, as she runs her hands up and down his biceps.  “You don’t look so good. What’s going on?”

“I don’t like hospitals much. Especially a place like THIS in a hospital.  Where people are really bad.  EXTRA bad.”

“He’s a lot better than anyone thought he would be. Especially so soon And he doesn’t look THAT awful, I swear. He’s even waking up for a little bits at a time. A person who is ‘extra bad’, wouldn't be doing that, would they?”

“I just don’t know if I can go in there just yet. I mean, I was there. Yesterday. In the van. I saw what he was like; how bad he was. And I’ve never seen Tyler like that. I’ve seen him shot a couple times during our tours in the Middle East, but those were nothing. Just flesh wounds, you know? But that? Yesterday? Those weren’t just flesh wounds. And by the time he got back home seven years ago…”

“He was already somewhat on his feet and in rehab.”

Rata nods. “He was almost back to himself. It’s going to be a long while before he gets back to himself this time.”

“Yesterday was pretty awful, huh?

He releases a small, shaky sigh. “Wasn’t so much how he looked. All the blood and what not. I mean, that was bad, don’t get me wrong. It was fucking awful. Pardon my language.”

“I hear and say worse all the time. You don’t have to filter yourself around me. You’ve met my husband, right? You can’t be easily offended AND stay married to him. It just won’t work.”

“It was terrible. A fucking nightmare. To see a friend of yours THAT messed up. But the worst part? It was what he SOUNDED like. When he was talking to you. I’ve never heard him sound like that. Ever.”

“Neither have I,” she admits. “Not seven years ago, not even the two times he tried to...well, you know.  He never sounded like THAT.”

“Like he was going to die.”

“Yesterday I tried telling myself he didn’t sound that way. That he was just tired and scared and in pain and he just needed it to end. I convinced myself that he didn’t sound THAT bad. Near death. Now I realize I was just trying to make myself feel better, know what I mean?”

Rata nods.

“He was a lot closer to it than I want to admit. I thought nothing could be worse than seven years ago. I was so wrong.”

“It was what he said to you. How he said it. He was pretty sure he was never going to see you again.  That’s the only thing he was really scared of; the thought of not getting to be with you anymore.  You and the kids. You’re his entire world. I didn’t think I realized how much he loves you all until I heard the things that came out of his mouth.   Opened my eyes; made me see him a different way. A good way, just different. He’s lucky. He’s got someone that loves him as much as he loves them. That’s something I think we all want but never seem to find.”

“Sometimes I wonder what I ever did right to deserve him,” she confesses. “And he’s here because of you guys. You and Koen. You did whatever you had to go get him here alive. So thank you. I know it wasn’t easy; what you had to see and do. I was there myself. Seven years ago. I know how hard it is.”

“I feel like such a dick. For not being able to go in there. Like a total pussy.”

“You’re not any of those things. People handle stuff like this in different ways. But you should go in there. He’s really not that bad. And he was awake and talking a bit to Koen. I don’t know if he still is, but I do know he’d like to see you. I know how much he appreciates what you did to help him. I’ll go in with you if that would help.”

“It would. A bit. But first,” he offers the gift bag. “ I have something for you. And the baby.”

“The baby won’t be here for months. You didn’t have to do that.”

“I wanted to. Just a little something.”

She reaches into the bag, smiling at the stuffed tiger that she pulls out of its confines. “How did you remember the tradition? Every Rake baby gets a stuffed animal?”

“Just something that stuck with me, I guess.”

“It’s adorable. Thank you. Better not let Millie get a hold of it. That girl and her stuffed animals, I swear.  You didn't have to do this. You didn’t…”  her voice trails off, fingers reaching for the familiar object tied to the ribbon around the tiger’s neck. Eyes narrowed at first, then slowly widening when the realization sets in it.   “Where did you find this? Where…?”

“I didn’t find it. Tyler gave it to me. Before we got to the storage place. He asked me to give it to you if something went wrong.”

“He did?” Esme unties the thin piece of fabric, sliding the ring off of it and then cradling it in her palm.

“He wanted me to make sure you got it. If he didn’t make it. Said it was important that you got it.”

“I thought it was lost,” her voice cracks with emotion. “I thought maybe he took it off beforehand and put it in his pocket and it fell out. Or that the ER staff misplaced it. I didn’t think I’d ever see it again.”

“I should have given it to you right away. Yesterday. Please don’t cry.”

“I’m not crying because of what you did or didn’t do. I thought it was gone. Forever. And I know it’s not much; it’s not expensive or fancy or anything like that. But it’s his. All the dents and scratches that he’s on it over the years. Sounds weird, but they all mean something.  I really thought I’d never see it again. And I didn’t think  I’d be as torn about it as I was. But it killed me inside; when I couldn’t find it. It felt like a piece of him was gone and I was just waiting for all the other pieces to disappear too. Thank you; you have no idea how much this means to me. To have this back.”

She hooks the handle of the bag around her wrist, then reaches around to the nape of her neck and removes the necklace -the custom made piece with the beach glass Millie had found- and slips the ring onto the chain.

“I’ll do it,” Rata offers, and steps behind her. Large fingers clumsy and struggling at first, but then manage to secure the clasp.

Esme lays a palm over the ring, firmly pressing it into her chest. Feeling the smooth, cool   metal with its many imperfections, the familiar weight of it against her. And the relief that simple piece of jewellery brings is profound, stifling sobs with both of her hands as she turns and tightly embraces her friend.

#Tyler Rake #Tyler Rake fan fiction #Tyler Rake fan fic #Extraction fan fiction

[tearsofthemis]

Tears of Themis : Chapter 2 “Unbearable Love“ Part 6

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▌Location- Exhibition Hall

(The nameless student I met earlier brought me to the new exhibition hall, and it was there that I met Mo Yi by chance.)

Mo Yi: “Good morning, MC.”

MC: “Good morning, Dr. Mo.”

???: “He’s the one that invited you?”

(Mo Yi noticed the student standing beside me, and his smile waned.)

Mo Yi: “Lu JingHe, you came. Well, that’s to be expected, considering the art gallery is hosted at your school, you’ll surely be in attendance.”

Lu JingHe: “Mo Yi…” MC: “Lu JingHe!?”

(Our firm’s collaborator, PAX Group’s acting CEO, Lu JingHe?! This is my first time seeing Lu JingHe in person, although his pictures have been plastered all over entertainment and economics forums.)

MC: (So this is Lu JingHe. The same person that was being talked about on the news app?!)

(I guess my shock was pretty evident. Mo Yi looked at me and seemingly read my mind.)

Mo Yi: “That’s right, it’s the same Lu JingHe that you’ve heard about on the news, in the flesh.”

MC: “You two… know each other?”

(I looked between Mo Yi and Lu JingHe and noticed that… Lu JingHe’s behavior expressed his desire to be anywhere else but here, near Mo Yi.)

Lu JingHe: “Who in their right mind would be excited to see their private tutor?”

(Private tutor? Mo Yi is younger than Lawyer Zuo, so Lu JingHe must be in his twenties. That’s not much of an age gap…)

Mo Yi: “He just came back from studying abroad. He graduated ahead of his class and is in the process of completing his masters at Stellis University. His father stressed the importance of understanding human psychology, and thus, I became his private tutor. His father thought he wouldn’t listen to an old professor, so he requested for me.”

MC: (Am I just too open with my thoughts, or are you guys just that observant? You just answered all my questions without me even asking…)

Lu JingHe: “Hiring an older professor sounds great right about now.”

Mo Yi: “Thank you for showing my partner the way, but we’ll be departing for the art gallery now. Have a good day.”

Lu JingHe: “I wanna see the gallery too. Let’s go together?”

Mo Yi: “...Kids these days sure are clingy.”

(Lu JingHe’s raised his eyebrow but didn’t say anything. However, Mo Yi’s expression, on the other hand, changed.)

MC: “Dr. Mo, what....”

(I followed Mo Yi’s line of vision and noticed a police officer approaching us. Lu JingHe’s back was facing the officer. He was armed and not just any ordinary officer.)

Mo Yi: “It would appear that our plans to visit the gallery will be cut short.”

MC: “Lu JingHe, behind you…”

(He must have guessed from my pale complexion that something was up. With a raised eyebrow, Lu JingHe turned to face the officer currently displaying his badge to us.)

Yan Wei: “I’m Yan Wei, Captain of Stellis Criminal Police Task Force. Are you Mr. Lu JingHe?”

Lu JingHe: “That’s me.”

Yan Wei: “Saturday, that is, yesterday from 9 PM until 2 AM, where were you?”

Lu JingHe: “I was attending a business reception at Manney Hotel. I left at around 7 PM and went home. Once there, I retired to my art studio.”

Yan Wei: “This business reception at Manney Hotel, was it hosted by Venus Fashion?”

Lu JingHe: “Yes, the event was hosted by Venus Fashion’s owner, Shen Xi, eldest daughter of the Shen family, and located in a neighboring province.”

Yan Wei: “During the reception, did you interact with Miss Shen Xi?”

Lu JingHe: “Of course. Yesterday’s reception was in celebration of Venus Fashion winning the Gold Design Award at Stellis Fashion Week. Out of courtesy, of course, I would congratulate Miss Shen. I also gave her a box of liquor-filled chocolates.”

Yan Wei: “With that said, you admit to the fact that you were the one who gave her the box of chocolates?”

Lu JingHe: “Why would I not admit to something that insignificant? Officer Yan, you’re not asking these questions just to stir up media, right?”

Yan Wei: “This morning, police received a report that someone in room 1818 of Manney Hotel was harmed.”

Yan Wei: “The deceased was identified as Shen Xi, female, twenty-six years old, and from a neighboring province. After preliminary autopsies were completed, forensic has determined her time of death was between 9 PM last night to 2 AM today. The cause of death was tetrodotoxin poisoning from ingesting laced liquor chocolates. Lu JingHe, since you already admitted to giving the chocolates to Miss Shen, you are under suspicion of her death. Please come with us.”

Lu JingHe: “Shen Xi was harmed? For real?”

(I don’t know what he was thinking, but Lu JingHe smiled and barked a laugh.)

Lu JingHe: “So now, are you asking me to cooperate with the investigation, or are you here to arrest me?”

Yan Wei: “This is only standard protocol. Do you think you’ll receive special privileges just because you’re a CEO?”

Lu JingHe: “How could I afford such heavy scrutiny, Officer Yan. Of course, I’ll cooperate, but surely I have the right to a lawyer at the very least?”

Yan Wei: “If you believe you require one, yes.”

(Lu JingHe nodded, seemingly content with Yan Wei’s response. Then spun around to look at me as his lips curved up in a devious smile.)

MC: (Is he thinking of…)

Lu JingHe: “MC, then can I ask you to represent me, as my lawyer?”

MC: (I guessed it!)

MC: “You must be joking…”

Lu JingHe: “I would never joke around with such a big issue.”

(His expectant gaze almost had me agree impulsively. Fortunately, reasoning stepped in and stopped me.)

MC: “My experience handling criminal cases is quite limited, Lawyer Zuo from our firm may be…”

Lu JingHe: “Zuo Ran, yeah I know him, he’s famous around here. But his fees are too expensive and I can't afford it. Don’t forget, our little accident from earlier, your fifty percent of the shared responsibility is still unaccounted for.”

MC: “And here you are still taking everything as a joke. Do you not understand how serious these allegations are! Lawyer Zuo can-”

Lu JingHe: “Do you think I’m the murderer? Do you trust me?”

MC: “Of course I-”

(Subconsciously, I wanted to admit that I trusted Lu JingHe. And I truly believe he didn’t commit the crime, but I don’t have the evidence to back up my claims. Perhaps this way of thinking carried over from my job, and I quickly rescinded the other half of my sentence.)

MC: “I believe in evidence and facts.”

Lu JingHe: “Makes sense, though it looks like you’ve agreed to represent me.”

MC: “H-hey! I did no such thing!”

Lu JingHe: “You said you believe in evidence, right? If you don't look for it, how can you find evidence? The way I understood it, you just said that you’re going to help me find evidence.”

MC: “That’s not what I meant!”

Lu JingHe: “I don’t care what you mean, that’s how I understood it.”

(Lu JingHe called Officer Yan over and emphasized again.)

Lu JingHe: “Officer, this lady is my lawyer. Can you take us to the crime scene so I can personally see these so-called troublesome chocolates.”

MC: “I’ll say it again, I never agreed to help!”

(Officer Yan didn’t comment on our argument and proceeded to lead Lu JingHe away. He didn’t handcuff Lu JingHe, as if he needn’t worry that Lu JingHe would attempt to escape.)

Mo Yi: “In psychology, this phenomenon is called ’The Halo Effect[1],’ or sometimes referred to as ‘The Halo Error.’ The initial impression that one may leave is affected by the emphasis of one’s strong points to cover one’s weaknesses. Lu JingHe is PAX Group’s successor and one of the wealthiest people in the world. He has an impeccably clean history. To accuse him of murder, hehe... in reality, even Officer Yan himself doesn’t believe he did it.”

MC: “So all I can do is accompany him to the crime scene.”

Mo Yi: “There’s nothing to lose from taking a look. Shall we then?”

MC: “We?”

Mo Yi: “That’s right, I’ll go with you. Since I specialize in criminal psychology, perhaps I could be of assistance.”

MC: “H-how can I ask you for such an important thing? Especially since you came here on your day off to check out the art exhibit. I think I should-”

Mo Yi: “A homicide case versus paintings on the wall, naturally I would pick to see the one that pertains to my area of expertise.”

(Mo Yi was speaking truthfully, and his golden eyes shone with warmth and sincerity. I don’t want to decline his offer as having an expert with me on the case would help give me more confidence.)

MC: “Then, I’ll have to trouble Dr. Mo.”

Mo Yi: “Let’s go, Lu JingHe is waiting for us.”

(Not far away, Lu JingHe stood with a scowl on his face. Judging from his depressed air, he looked like a child who just had his toys taken away as he stood pouting. I couldn’t help but think that perhaps he looked cute. Then I recalled something Lu JingHe had just said to me.)

MC: (Lu JingHe said he couldn’t afford to hire Lawyer Zuo?! CAN’T... AFFORD?!)

——-

T/N: [1] Halo effect (sometimes called the halo error) is the tendency for positive impressions of a person, company, brand or product in one area to positively influence one's opinion or feelings in other areas. (Source: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Halo_effect)

——-

[Previous Chapter] | [Masterlist] | [Next Part]

——- 

 《CREDIT》 Translator: @humi-and-co​​ Editor: @cL QC: @hallowsivy​ 《未定事件簿》Tears of Themis is a 2020 Chinese otome game by 米哈游Mihoyo. All original credits go to 米哈游Mihoyo. 

 《 VOICE ACTORS 》 Mo Yi | Jiang GuangTao: https://weibo.com/jiangguangtao  Lu JingHe | Yang Tianxiang: https://weibo.com/u/1745507755  Yan Wei: https://weibo.com/lengquanyeyue

——-

Ivy: Ahaha I don’t usually put MC’s face in here but that last sprite was too good to not add.

Humi: Fun Fact: Tetrodotoxin (the poison used to kill Shen Xi) is the neurotoxin found in pufferfish, and can cause cardiac arrest and/or asphyxiation. Very cool!

#tears of themis #tears of themis translations #otome #weiding shijian bu #未定事件簿 #tears of themis mo yi #tears of themis lu jinghe #otome game #otome game translations #lu jinghe #mo yi #莫弈 #陆景和

[holylulusworld]

Blue-white-red and grey

Summary: Steve saves you but the case ain’t over and you have to find a way to catch the bad guy while pining for the golden boy...

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Reader, Natasha Romanoff, Tony Stark, OFC’ Scott Porter

Warnings: a hint of angst, awkward situations, bad flirting skills, tension, mutual pining, two idiots in love, comforting, fluff and a hint of making out

He looks like a Greek god as he picks you up to carry you out of the building. Strong muscles, chiseled jaw – the golden boy closer than you ever thought possible.

“I can walk, Captain.” You protest. “My colleagues need help. I appreciate you want to bring me out, but I’m still able to walk. Let me help the civilians.”

Captain America shakes his head. He can see the deep cut at your lower abdomen, you can’t and he can hear your heart is pumping way to fast – not only due to the adrenaline rushing through your veins.

“I need to bring you to the quin-jet. Natasha, Sam and Tony will help your colleagues, Detective.” The tall Avengers rumbles and you lean against his chest. The last thing you see before unconsciousness drags you away is the star on his chest. “You’re going to make it…”

----

“Fuck!” You curse sitting up in a foreign bed. A worried Captain America is looking down at you gasping as you moved too fast.

Now without his helmet, shield, and uniform, he sits next to your bed in normal clothes, like a normal guy. Eying him for a moment you wonder if he always wears dress pants and a dress shirt if he’s not Captain America.

“Is something wrong, Detective?” Steve asks as you look up at him. “No…I just never saw Captain America in civil clothes, sorry. I guess I was staring.” You stammer and he chuckles lightly, as his hand squeezes yours.

“I’m only a normal boy from Brooklyn without my uniform and shield.” Steve rumbles. “How do you feel? Dr. Cho said the wound should heal soon. Something about Starks technology and genetic manipulated…I forgot.” Steve shrugs giving you a shy smile.

“I feel good. Nothing hurts but I guess I got some painkillers. I’m sorry I was stubborn.” Your eyes meet Steve’s blue ones and he gives you a bright smile in return.

“You remind me of myself, Y/N. Sorry…I mean Detective Y/L/N…” Steve seems to be nervous out of the blue.

“Y/N is fine. You saved me after all. I owe you my first name or a steak.” You tease and Steve, he nods. “I’ll take the steak too. I’m old-fashioned and would pay at our first date but you can buy me a steak anytime.” Steve’s face is slightly flushed as he leans closer, clearing his throat.

“Anytime, Captain. I owe you a beer too…” You shrug and he nods eagerly, still this smile on his lips. “How are my colleagues?”

“Tony and the others were able to free all other hostages. Only one got shot. He’s in a coma but Dr. Cho is taking good care of him. Surgery was successful and all.”

“Thank you, Captain.”

“Please, call me Steve. I’m only a normal guy…”

This time it’s your turn to flush red as he leans closer, placing a soft kiss to your hand. “Also, it’s an honor to meet the Detective catching the Brooklyn strangler. I wish I could’ve been a help with the case but I’m better in breaking through a wall…” Steve sighs.

“And saving hurt people, Cap…I mean Steve. Without you and your fellow Avengers, I and my colleagues would be dead. We never assumed one of our colleagues would attack us. It’s a shame, we all trusted him…” Your eyes water remembering the moment your former colleague and friend started to shoot people in your department.

“I’m sorry, Y/N. We are investigating this incident. So far we know he was not on his own. We are sure someone gave him instructions and his family is gone…” Steve explains, and your eyes widen.

“Fuck. Scott…he said that he doesn’t want to do this…” You gasp trying to get out of the bed only for Steve to catch your fall as your legs are too weak right now. “Easy there, young lady. If someone was blackmailing your colleague Tony will find out. Now back into the bed.”

“Uh-huh. I think you should buy me a steak first, Captain.” You tease and Steve looks flustered but there’s a hint of a dirty grin on his lips. “I’ll do it anytime, doll.”

“Sorry. Sometimes I tend to flirt to break the ice. I didn’t want to make you feel uncomfortable, Cap…I mean Steve.” Now you glance at his chest while he holds you in his arms, strong arms. You can’t take your eyes off his neck, wondering how it feels to wrap your arms around him or how his skin would taste…

“UH…Steve? Care to explain why Miss Y/L/N or rather Detective Y/L/N is not in her bed?” Natasha asks glancing at you in Captain America's arms.

“She wanted to storm out of the room, and I had to catch her, Nat,” Steve explains.

“I tend to fall lately, and Captain America was luckily around to catch me once again. I mean the fall from the balcony would’ve killed me for sure…”

“You’re welcome, Detective. Steve is good at saving people and we need your help. Scott Porter, the colleague attacking your department refuses to talk to anyone but you. Can you help us?” Natasha’s eyes meet yours as you nod, looking around the room to find your clothes.

“I got a bag with clothes for you, Detective. It’s in a spare room next to Steve’s. We ask if Dr. Cho agrees you can leave the hospital bed for two hours. Steve can carry you if you prefer his arms instead of a wheelchair.” Natasha teases and Steve glares at her, but a smile is creeping onto his lips.

----

“Scott, I’m here. If you want help - if someone is holding your family hostage tell me now. Only me and you as it used to be.” You say as Scott glances at your wheelchair.

“I’m sorry you almost got killed. This wasn’t my intention. I thought they want me to hack the system, give them needed information and leave the department. Then someone called me, telling me that I have to get the gun out of my trunk and enter the department.” Scott whispers shaking by now.

“What else, Scott?”

“This man, the voice promised if I kill you, Masters and McKenzie I’ll see my family again. That they would let them go. I went in and you know the rest…” Scott’s eyes meet yours and you know he didn’t lie.

“Anything you can tell me about the man? Did anyone else contact you?”

“No. Three days ago, I came home and Theresa along with Paul was gone. I got a call. This voice told me to remain silent and wait for instructions. Then they sent me a picture of my family, tied to a chair, guns aimed at their heads.” Scotts voice cracks. “They are dead…aren’t they?”

“We don’t know so far. Mr. Stark and his team search for your family and the people behind all of this. Did this voice tell you why we shall die?” You ask.

“A case, I guess…dunno. He only told me I must kill these three people. The guns were in my trunk. I entered the department and the voice told me to wait till 2 pm before starting to fire.”

“2 pm exactly? Why?” Pinching the bridge of your nose you look toward the door as Steve steps in. “As Nick Fury, Tony and I would be close by at 2 pm. We had a meeting in the building next to your department, at 2 pm exactly. Only for the person calling us to not show up. This smells like a trap…” Steve mutters pacing around the room.

“I don’t get it. Why telling Scott to kill us knowing you and the others would be there? The guy at the end of the line must’ve known you would stop Scott and save me and the others…”

“Crap. We brought all injured cops to the tower, Y/N.” Steve’s eyes meet yours and you gasp at the realization. “Someone might sneak in, fuck…” Cursing you try to get up as Steve shakes his head, picking you up once again to rush out of the room, yelling for Jarvis to warn every Avenger and to initiate security alert.

“Uh, Cap. I can walk…” You mutter as he runs toward Tony’s office to let him check every person they brought into the medical bay.

----

“Okay. All critic areas are locked. No one got in.” Tony explains. We locked the medical bay too.”

“Maybe we are wrong?” You ask glancing at the monitor. “Or not. Can you show me, everyone, you brought in? If someone sneaked in I can tell you who is not one of my colleagues…”

“Great,” Steve exclaims carefully placing you onto Tony’s chair. “Let’s start then.”

----

“Last four.” You yawn. “That’s Miller, he’s an ass but one of the best cops I know, good instinct and all. Next.” Looking at the monitor you zoom in, shaking your head. “That’s Detective Becker,” Tony says but you shake your head.

“No. Becker retired three weeks ago. He’s over 62. That guy is barely 32 or younger.”

“You sure?” Steve asks.

“More than sure, Cap…” you mutter as Tony watches you and Steve. “I just wanted to be sure before I rip this guy apart for hurting you…” Clearing his throat Steve corrects his words. “…and your colleagues…”

“I don’t know this guy, but he’s for sure not Becker.”

“Great. Tony, keep her safe…” Storming out of the room Steve can’t see the smirk on Tony’s face or the eye-roll you give him. “He likes you…”

“I think Captain America likes everyone. He’s just a good guy…” You shrug.

“First of all, Steve doesn’t like everyone and believe it or not I can see if a guy is into someone. Give him a chance. We need to get our Captain out of his bachelor status…” Tony smirks as you roll your eyes again.

“I think Steve can handle this on his own. He’s a grown man…a tall man…with muscles and the bluest eyes, I ever saw, and his voice does things to me…” Trailing off you glare at Tony who is looking at you with a smug grin all over his voice. “Well, fuck me…”

“No swear words while being around Captain America and I have to decline this offer as Steve will rip me a new hole if I try to hit on you, Detective.  He’s a fan after all.” Tony chuckles.

“Fan?”

“Yeah. He saw you in the news and won’t stop swooning about how tough you must be, how smart and how pretty your smile is…”

Mouth agape you watch Steve dragging the fake Becker into Tony’s office. While the guy struggles against Steve’s strength Captain America doesn’t even sweat.

“I think Natasha will have some fun interrogating this guy,” Steve mutters dropping the cursing man to the floor.

“Good job, Cap.” Tony chuckles. “You better bring Detective Y/L/N to your room, ahem…I mean her room. She must be exhausted…”

----

“What a day. I almost got killed. Met Captain America and solved a case with the Avengers. Not bad for a small-town girl…” You chuckle as Steve carries you back toward the medical bay.

“I had fun too…uh…would you…I mean…” Clearing his throat Steve carefully places you onto the bed. “Detective Y/L/N would you give me the honor to go out with me…I’ll pay. You can buy me the steak later.” Steve stammers.

“It will be my honor, Captain. But, I prefer Y/N…”

“Steve…”

“God, Rogers. Tell her you are fangirling for months.” Tony mutters from the hallway. “Just get yourself a life, a girl and maybe some sex.”

“Tony!” Steve warns.

“I wouldn’t mind…uh…” Your cheeks heat up as you look at Steve, flustered. “I mean the date…”

“Same…” Steve is nervously glancing at you.

“I mean sex is not out of the picture but not after a first date, Rogers.”

“I would never…I’m a gentleman.”

“I know you are but is there a dirty man hidden underneath this righteous suit?” You whisper as Steve gives you a dirty smirk. “A gentleman doesn’t kiss and tell…”

“Hmm…then just kiss me and tell no one…”

His lips are on yours in a blink. Soft and gentle he moves his pillows against yours, careful…deliberate. The complete opposite of the strength he shows during fights.

“Okay…this was…” Steve moans against your lips.

“I’m sorry to disturb you but we got a problem,” Tony says clearing his throat. “According to the information this guy gave us Porter’s family is still alive, held hostage and they won’t let them go except for we give them the whereabouts of all imprisoned members of an organization called Red Storm.”

“Never heard of it.” Steve mutters not amused Tony disturbed your intimate moment.

“These people kidnap and sell young girls. They are specialized in human trafficking. We blew up one of their covers and arrest at least fifteen members. Masters, McKenzie, Porter and I were the ones storming the building in cooperation with Director Fury and Shield.” You explain.

“They are selling girls?” Steve curses not believing people can be that cruel some. “Sadly…yes. One of the girls was barely ten. We came just in time. These girls were as these bastards called it ‘fresh meat’.” Sighing you slam your fist into the mattress. “We can’t let one of these monsters go, Steve. They will do it again.”

“Don’t worry. Now you’ve got the Avengers on your side. Tell us everything you know about this organization, Detective.” Tony exclaims dialing Fury’s number. “This guy wanted to hack Fury’s computer to get the needed information. The attack was only a red herring.”

“Steve…I can’t let them go back to ‘work’.”

“We won’t. You and I will take them down and after, you’ll buy me this steak.” A grin on his face Steve squeezes your hand.

“Sounds like a plan, Captain.”

“Believe me…blue-white-red and grey – perfect combination…”

“Grey?”

“You wore a grey pantsuit when I saw you in the news…”

“I like it…lets get the bad guys then and I’ll wear the suit for you again…”

“Guys, no flirting…” Tony groans watching you and Steve pining for each-other. “We got work to do. Fury will meet us in thirty…he's pissed...”

To be continued...

All works Tags

@yolobloggers, @meganywinchester​, @shikshinkwon​, @miraclesoflove ​, @mogaruke, @shatteredabby, @soryuwifeyxx, @letsdisneythings, @i-love-superhero

Marvel Tags

@stuckys-whore, @notyourtypicalrose, @voltage-my2dlove, @thedoctorscamanion , @officialmarvelwhore, @randomgirlkensy, @juniorhuntersam, @lumar014, @doctorswife221b, @badboysdoitbetter2​, @sister-winchesters99, @sweetkingdomstarlight-blog

Steve Rogers/Chris Evans Tags

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#marvel fanfiction #marvel masterlist #marvel one shot #marvel tag #natasha romanoff #tony stark #steve rogers #steve x reader #steve rogers x reader #steve rogers x you #steve rogers x y/n #steve x y/n #captain america #captain america fanfic #captain america oneshot #captain america x reader #steve rogers one shot #steve rogers fanfiction

[isabelisfun]

canada’s drag race commentary

ilona was annoying but i do think she seems really sweet

lemon just looks so cute in her pageant outfit

wth is on jbc’s face and wth is on brooke’s head

ooh yay puppets!!

the way priyanka and lemon are paired up even when it was random

priyanka is the narrator of the season and i love it

ooh good scarlett finally won something i think that’s deserved

oh i love them using rainbow railroad

aw scarlett played fair with the pairing up that’s so sweet

ooh wigs and grace that’s pretty legit

aw omg that’s literally the cutest thing that elton is already a fan of priyanka 🥺

pri’s confessionals make me laugh every time istg

omg i love lemon naming her daughter lime that’s iconic

i think it’s really important that they had refugees come on as opposed to fans or friends or whatever, cuz this really reminds us of why it’s important to have shows like drag race and how it’s a privilege to exist freely

brooke lynn’s hair is giving me queen of the clowns realness

jbc’s makeup literally looks like that one vine of a little girl in makeup (y’all know the one)

okkk priyanka and electra look amazing and electra really has the energy down, scarlett and violet’s outfit is not it for me, lemon and lime look so cute, AND RITA IS A CLOWN THATS NOT A GOOD THING- but they do look good, jimbo and her daughter look amazing and jimbo shocks me with her versatility every week

aw pri’s crying 🥺

eh ig lemon’s energy maybe wasn’t great but i love the looks

scarlett and violet’s makeup looks really good, i’m just not a huge fan of the looks

too sexy i- what kind of bs critique is that

i like rita’s looks but yah it’s not super cohesive

oh so we’re finally realizing rita is not the strongest in the fashion department

electra lowkey looks like bob the drag queen

god pri is so hot

i can not get over this hair from brooke i just hate it that’s all

these jimbo critiques do not make no sense to me

YAYY PRI WON IM SO PROUD OF HER!!

oh FINALLY rita is in the bottom

this is such a weird choice for a lipsync song idrk who’s doing better i hope lemon stays but also they’re both doing pretty good ig

ok lemon started kinda weak but she was really good at the end and rita was pretty good

ok well i didn’t really want rita to stay but ig she lipsynced well

aw i’m gonna miss lemon she’s such a cutie

omg michelle is the guest host next week!!

#canada’s drag race #drcan #drag race canada #rpdr #rupaul's drag race #drag race #cdr

[waterfall-mirage]

So I wanted to write some theif Chat Noir and Marichat and came up with this

Sorry if the spacing is off this is being Sent from iPhone™️

A criminal.

Explained simply by the dictionary: a person who has committed a crime. A lawbreaker, delinquent, villain, culprit. These are all words you’d associate with someone who lived a life of crime.

So clearly- speaking in an obvious term- one should not get themselves into any trouble of the outlaw type. Yet somehow the bad luck seemed to find Marinette everywhere she went. She didn’t know when the infatuation had started, but she could remember seeing him on the news a few weeks ago when she had gotten home from her internship with Agreste fashion. She had to stay late as Natalie had requested her to revise some upcoming fall designs. As tired as Marinette was there could possibly be no way she could turn down an opportunity to add her own touch to such a massive collection.

Stepping through the door she lazily threw on some sweatpants, let her hair down from a tight headache inducing bun, and flicked on the small box t.v that sat on her kitchen counter. There was a low humming noise from the device as it tuned to find a channel. Marinette rolled her eyes, she needed to save up for an appliance that wasn't almost older than her. She turned away grabbing the pink kettle off of her stove filling it with some water. Another classic dinner for a starving artist, instant ramen. Pulling her bowl and chopsticks from their designated spot she listened into the news channel. Chat Noir had struck again, this time a watch store. The helicopter cam followed him as he seamlessly bounced between the roofs of homes. Marinette stepped forward from her position of leaning on the stove trying to get a better look at the tiny screen. Dressed clad in black as usual the unknown street cat did what he does best vanishing in between two buildings, a considerably dark alley even for seven o’clock in late summer. The helicopter hovered for a moment before the screen changed back to Nadja Chamack. Marinette let out a breath she didn’t know she was holding. Turning back to the stove to finish her meal. Chat Noir was a force to be messed with, he had already stolen three paintings from the Louvre successfully, rumours saying his fourth was nearing soon. The police have no clue on where to look or how to find him. Nicknamed by the public Chat Noir was “the vanishing kitten”. The name undermined his work, so he claimed he was going to step it up a notch.

Although Marinette never agreed to be a part of it.

The sweetest of dreams were brought to her that night. A wonderful extravaganza of her showing off her very own fashion line at Agreste fashion. The theme was 1960’s era mixed into modern fashion. Blissful, teals, reds, ivories, yellow, pinks dancing along with patterns, skirts, and thigh high boots washed over her. An Airy white translucent button up blouse with bell sleeves paired with a deep red pencil skirt. She could feel her dreamself twitching to start the sketching process. However, instead of witnessing her dream unfold she was unfortunately startled out of it in her dark room. Marinette rubbed her eyes as the sirens of Paris’ police department whizzed by flashing red and blue lights briefly through her windows. Groggily she reached over smacking her night table until her hand came in contact with her phone. Squinting at the brightness the phone displayed the time of two in the morning. She groaned pulling the pillow over her head to try to drown the noise out. Until she heard a thud from her balcony. Blue eyes opening behind the soft pillow Marinette’s heart dropped at the sound.The wind must’ve knocked one of her plants over, that's all. She sat up peering over to her french doors there was nothing to be seen in the pitch blackness of the night. Marinette let out a sigh of relief, what was she thinking? She placed her pillow back in its original position laying back down.

“C’mon, Marinette” she whispers to herself. “Get a grip”. She closed her eyes once again.

Chk. Chk. Chk.

Then she hears it, a slight rattle. A familiar rattle, the same rattle she’d dealt with when she first moved in trying to unlock the door. She now knew there was a slight left turn jiggle she had to do to get it to unlock. But clearly this intruder isn't one of the friends Marinette told this trick to. She panics jumping out of bed, she has no place to hide in a studio apartment. In the dark she blindly reaches for any sort of weapon. Her small hand grasps the baseball bat her dad had given her as a defense weapon when she moved out. Of course at the time she laughed at it but still hugged her papa anyway, joking that she’d take up baseball soon. Her blood goes cold, what an awful thing to come true, she thinks.

The rattling stops Marinette lets out a mini sigh, maybe it was a Chat Noir copycat that just wasn’t cut out for the robbing life. She lowered the rod down her shoulders sinking a little. “Whew” she manages to let out.

Then the door swings open. Marinette holds back a scream lifting up her weapon “Whoever is trying to get in here I don’t have much but I will defend my life for it!” She pathetically calls out in no particular direction. Marinette can’t see much of anything until she spots them. Two glowing green eyes in the darkness of the room. She lets out a tiny shriek waving her bat around, she feels a “thwoop” in her hands. In fear of the unknown Marinette swings her arm frantically towards the wall her fingers just barely smacking the light switch. The baseball bat which she thought she had acquired was actually an umbrella, that was now spread. Still holding her guard Marinette lifts the “weapon” pointedly towards the black figure in her partially lit apartment.

A chuckle leaves the cats lips as he walks towards her. “Aw, Princess opening up so soon? We just met” he smiles coyly at her. The hairs on the back of Marinette’s neck rise. Up close Chat Noir is handsome, which Marinette decides is very unfair as she’s currently being robbed by him. However, she’s also certain he couldn’t be much older than her as well. Which gave her a bit more confidence to tell him off. As he approached she jabbed the umbrella at him which humoured the cat as he lifted his hands up in the air as if he had been caught in the act. A devilish smile displayed in amusement. Chat Noir began to move in closer and she got a better look at the thief. His golden hair disheveled in front of his face casting a slight shadow over his viridescent eyes which seemed to glow. There was a black mask covering his upper face from cheek bones to brow. Black cat ears were perky twitching as he moved as if picking up on things. He had a small black pouch tied around his waist which seemed to be full. Marinette speculated it was used to stash smaller items such as jewelry or watches as he had stolen earlier that day. His boots were somehow quiet as he maneuvered towards her. She tried to keep distance with the umbrella at arms length but quite true to his cat nature he slipped through the barrier. Red and blue lights flashed outside her apartment once again. Marinette left with only a few options left resorted to the cry for help. As she parted her lips the cat seemingly doubled his speed to prevent what he knew was about to happen his leather clad hand covered her mouth in seconds.

“Shh they’re coming.” He coo’s pointing upwards and winking as the sound of a helicopter chopped past them. Marinette noticed a puff of air that had left his chest. A sigh of relief most likely. “Chat Noir, charmed to meet you” He turned to her, sneaky green eyes burning a permanent image in her mind. He gently removes the umbrella from her grasp lifting her hand to place a kiss on her knuckles. Marinette makes a face in disgust retreating her arm back to her side.

“You are?” Chat continued on pretending Marinette had not just clearly shown she wanted nothing to do with him. A smile so sweet perked up his features even the baker’s daughter felt her stomach protest. Marinette confused, and quite frankly still scared gathered the courage to fiercely bark back at the mangy cat. “None of your business, now leave!” She crosses her arms over her chest. He sighs in a feigned love sick kind of way placing the back of his hand against his forehead gloved fingers curled. “Such a shame I don’t get to match such a pretty name to an even prettier face” his body language shifts and a devilish glint in his eye shows he’s toying with her, playing with his prey before he feasts. “However, I think Princess suits you well.” Chat practically purrs. Marinette can’t help the shiver that runs down her spine. Her cheeks heat up and she curses her body for being weak to even a compliment from a criminal.

“Relax, okay?” He spins the now closed umbrella between them. “I’m not here to rob you, i'm here for refuge” Chat states matter of factly before turning away from her and walking around her apartment like he owns the place. Spotting the kitchen a little “oh!” leaves the self proclaimed non-burglars mouth as he struts over to the fridge. Marinette who was previously frozen to her spot comes back to reality. Well who does this mangy cat think he is? She stomps after him shutting the fridge. Chat Noir mewls pulling his thumb out of the closed fridge door suckling on the injured digit. “I don’t know who you think you are, but you don’t just go around taking refuge in random peoples homes!” Marinette whisper yelled pointing at him. Chat rolls his glowing eyes still sucking on his thumb. “Now look at me im involved in your stupid crime” she pokes his chest which she refuses to admit is very hard at the moment. He gives her a deadpan as if to say “yeah, yeah, i’m listening”. This enrages the bluenette further.

“And give me my umbrella back!” She swipes the black umbrella from his greedy paws. Marinette marches over to the still open french door the cool August night breeze flowing into her apartment. “Out!” She calls pointing with the umbrella. Chat grins a cheshire smile appearing ear to ear. Marinette isn’t completely sure how to feel about his demeanor. A snicker leaves him and his shoulders bounce as if to show his amusement.

“Oh, i’ll go” Chat smirks walking towards her from the shadows of the kitchen.

“But I like you princess” he firmly states. Chat Noir saunters towards her in true cat fashion in long strides of his legs. Marinette's heart rate picks up as he nears. What is going on with her? He’s close, too close Marinette decides. When she takes a step back it’s into the door she realizes she can’t get enough distance between them. His nose mere centimeters from her face she blinks, once, twice, his glowing eyes still boring into hers.

“So I'll be seeing you again” he whispers. Marinette’s breath hitches, hands pressed to the glass door behind her. He salutes her with a wink “Goodnight, Princess, see you soon!” With that he leaps off of her balcony and into the night. Wide blue eyes stare at the bright white moon. Her hands clutch her chest wrinkling her newly made pyjama shirt. “Oh Marinette what have you gotten yourself into now” she whispered into the night. Marinette slid down the door continuing to keep eye contact with the moon. Safe to say she didn't sleep well that night.

#miraculous ladybug #i have more to post the word doc is 5k #just testing the waters loll #i havent written in a long ass time #sorry if its bad but it needed to be out of my word doc #marichat #marinette dupain cheng #chat noir #maricat #adrien agreste #miraculous tales of ladybug and chat noir #theif chat noir #ml fic #ml fics #mlb fic