#too personal w the anxiety looking back and forward

[sorenwuzhere]

The Day After

cw: dubcon, male reader, overstimulation, implied prior engagement in sexual activities, ooc, porn without plot A/N: I have never read or watched Jujutsu Kaisen and I don't think I will have time to do so anytime soon so don't expect an accurate writing of Toji. I just wrote this purely for the horny lol. This is also a pretty old draft I wrote this back in 2021 and haven't edited it, just wanted to get rid of it from my google docs. Anyway, enjoy or don't.

Toji’s eyes fluttered open just doing that seemed hard, a familiar ache in his lower abdomen and his ass. Memories of last night came flooding back, he opened his eyes fully and saw your naked body lying next to him, sleeping peacefully, it’s almost like you weren’t the person who fucked him until he passed out last night. He groaned in annoyance, partly from the pain that’s coursing through his body and the other from the fact that he wasn’t able to top you last night, there was also a bit of anxiety from you telling people about this, but it turned him on more than anything even though he was too prideful to admit it. He tries to get up but is immediately pulled down, he looks up and finds you pinning him from above

“Where are you going, To-ji” you asked the smaller man, saying his name mockingly, he tsked at you before answering

“I’m going to get something to drink” he replied

“Hm, why do you have to go anywhere for that? I have something for you to drink here” you replied slowly stroking your dick, smirking upon seeing the faint blush on the tips of Toji’s ears

“W-what the fuck are you saying” Toji replied after much thinking, silently cursing himself for stuttering, you smirked raising your eyebrows in amusement, you hold your dick on your hand jerking it off faster, Toji quickly catches you doing so and tries to hide the fear and anticipation 

“What- you’re-” before he could even finish you place your dick on top of his chest, pushing his pecs together, his pink cheeks blooms into a bloody red, words stuck in his throat

“Hah, so all it takes for you to shut up is a cock? I knew you were a slut” you spoke after a while, he opens his mouth to give you a snide remark but before a sound could even get out of his mouth, you thrust your dick inside him, his eyes widen in surprise and he gags from the sudden thrust

“There you go, just shut up and take it like the slut you are, yeah?” Toji closed his eyes as he unconsciously nodded his head, swirling his tongue on the tip of your cock to try and take a taste of you. You snort at his face, you haven’t even done much yet but he’s already so pliant, looks like fucking him dumb last night did the trick.

Again you thrust your hips to his mouth and he quickly responds licking your cock all over and bobbing his head the best he can, Toji brought up his hands to his chest and brought them together to give you more stimulation, he pushes his body up to rub you, you sigh in pleasure, breathing becoming more ragged as he continues, you continue on thrusting your hips in a slow steady rhythm, you stop for a moment and he looks up at you as if searching for an answer why you stopped but he didn’t have the chance to ask why when he felt your tip prodding his entrance teasingly, small whimpers escapes his lips while you tease him with your tip, he was getting frustrated he just wanted you inside of him already! 

“Are you putting it inside or not?” he glares at you, you hum amused at him for snapping at you, you snicker then finally snapped your hips forward to get your cock inside him, despite how much you fucked him last night his hole was so tight, sucking you in so eagerly.

Toji moaned at the feeling of your cock inside him, no matter how much you pounded him last night he couldn’t get used to the feeling of your cock inside him, it was just too much, your scent, your size, your stare, everything was so overwhelming and he wasn’t sure how to deal with all of these things at once, it was almost suffocating and although he would never admit it out loud he wouldn’t mind drowning in your presence.

You wanted to wait for him to relax but recalling how much shit he’s given you, you pushed the thought back and started thrusting into his tight hole. Toji was caught off guard. He didn't expect you to go immediately; he thought you’d at least be considerate enough for him to get ready, but he found it quite…hot.

“Hah, you’re hole just tightened, is this turning you on? What a slut" You asked the small man, he let out a choked moan, he couldn’t catch his breath from your pounding, how do you still have this much energy after everything you did to him last night.

Toji looked dazed, all you could do is chuckle at his expression, putting his legs on your shoulders and pressing his chest with yours, you trailed kisses down his neck and then bit onto his skin that was already full of bruises, he screamed as he feels blood trickle down his neck

“Ngh- not- AHH!” again he was cut off by his moans as you set a punishing pace, pounding into him roughly

“Haah! Agh Ahn~ W-wai- you fucking- ba- Hahh~ bastard” Toji kept getting cut off by his moans, it was actually quite impressive despite how fast you’re going, you wonder how fast you’ll need to thrust for him to shut up

Finally you stopped thrusting after a bit, he pants and tries to catch his breath propping himself up using his elbows to look at you

“What? Tired already? Thought you were going to shut me up with your dick? You ca-” Toji let out a silent scream, you thrust into him again this time harder, faster, rougher, he didn’t even know that was possible, what is with this inhumane speed? 

“Hmm? Why are you quiet now? Isn’t. This. What. You. Wanted?” you asked, thrusting harder into him to emphasize your words, all he could do as a reply was to moan and whine he couldn’t let a single word out because of the sudden shock of you thrusting in him

“That’s more like it, you’re prettier just being an obedient little slut so just stay that way, alright?” you taunt the man, he nodded dumbly too fucked out to register your words. You chuckle, he definitely looked better dumbed down like this. 

Toji suddenly shivered and you took that as a sign that you found his spot, you smirk at him and adjust his legs to hit his spot precisely, pistolling your hips you aim for his spot and thrust into him fast and rough, just how he liked it

“Mhh- Ahh! Ngh I- going to- ha- ack!” Toji tried to tell you that he was close but he was so fucked out that you can’t understand anything he’s saying but the tightening of his ass, his shivering, his lolled out tongue and his rolled back eyes spoke for itself

“Hah, cumming already? Aren’t you a certified whore how can you not take at least this much?” you said, getting cut off to breathe every once and again from how fast you were thrusting

“Ngh- can- please cum–!” he said again trying to warn you, opening his mouth wide a scream ripped out of his throat as he came all over his stomach and chest, some of it landing on your stomach, but even as he just came you still haven’t stopped thrusting, sobbing, Toji tried to push you away

“N-No mo– Ah~ ngh- plea- I- haah~” sobbing in between his words, you don’t bother trying to understand his words, just indulging yourself with his inside and chasing your own high you were even more turned on by him sobbing underneath you, Toji was terrified to feel you grow bigger in him, how was that even possible? 

“You- just now you- nggh~ I— haah~ wai-” Toji couldn’t let out coherent words anymore he was so drunk at the feeling of you, he can’t handle this any longer, just how much more will you keep going? 

Finally after what seemed like forever, Toji felt your cum fill him up and pushed him to the edge as he came again moaning your name. Toji pants, sighing in relief as he tried to catch his breath, his relieve was short lived as you pushed out of him and lift him up to make him lay on his stomach then push inside of him again

“Haah! Ngh~ Please I can’t anymore, no- m-ngh- haah~ more p-leashee~!” Toji’s begging fell onto deaf ears as you adjusted his hips, putting his knees on the bed and lifting his ass before pulling out until only your tip remained in him before slamming in again and again not letting him catch his breath.

Toji clutched the sheets and again tried to get away from you, crawling away, but your hard and fast thrusts made his legs wobbly and he couldn't find the strength to keep on moving.

You smirk as you feel him stop trying to get away and slowly giving in to your touch. You lean down to his ear and nibble on his earlobe 

“That’s it, did you figure it out? Below me is where you belong, so stay still~” you whispered huskily in his ear, Toji felt shivers down his spine upon feeling your hot breath on his nape and hearing your husky voice that’s a bit out of breath from how fast you were going.

Feeling his hole suddenly tighten you groaned causing his hole to tighten around you even more, ah did he find that hot? Toji was easier than you thought. Hearing you chuckle right beside his ear, Toji felt his face getting hot, what the hell is up with him? Why is he feeling this way? Over a chuckle? How fucking pathetic

“You keep on squeezing me Toji, what are you thinking inside that pretty little head of yours hm?” you comment, and to your delight that made him tighten around you even more

“Haha, you make me feel so good baby, let me repay the favor~” you whisper teasingly, adjusting your grip and the position of your thrusts, you thrust into him perfectly hitting his prostate, Toji gasped. 

You began hammering into him smashing his prostate repeatedly, the poor boy couldn’t even let out a whole moan as he keeps getting cut off from more of his moans, his eyes rolled to the back of his head as he clutches the sheets harder, he bites onto the pillow below him feeling ashamed of the loud moans he keeps on releasing. 

You brought your hand down his face and forced him to look at you before you went down and crashed your lips with him, your other hand going down to his dick stroking him rough and fast, Toji gasped as you had planned, you shoved your tongue inside his mouth, exploring the inside of his mouth kissing him feverishly.

Toji feels himself melt and become more pliant to your touches once he feels your tongue inside his mouth, gulping in his moans and kissing him as if you’ve starved and his lips are the only things that can satiate your hunger, and he wasn’t wrong— you have waited way too long for this, you’re going to take every chance you get and make sure he won’t be able to forget the way you touched him and played with his body as you please like no one did before.

Separating from his lips you place your hand on his tits, you start to squeeze and massage them, pinching his nipples and playing with it. Toji's breath becomes ragged and whines every now and then slips from his mouth, everything was so overwhelming, just then his vision turned white and again he came onto the sheets, tears pricking his eyes and falling down his cheeks onto the sheets, not long after you came inside him 

“Haa I- hngh~ are- mmh!” Not understanding what he’s trying to say, you caught his lips in yours and kissed again, Toji noticed a trace of gentleness and savored every single bit of it until it quickly disappeared. 

Feeling him stop from moving you separated your lips from him, seeing him passed out you quirked your eyebrow, you contemplated if you were going to continue or let him rest, glancing at his face to see his peaceful expression one more time, you came to the decision that you’d let Toji take a rest for now.

Pulling out of him you picked him up and laid him down on his back, taking out the sheets and venturing into the bathroom to fetch wet towels to wipe his body down with. After replacing the sheets and cleaning Toji and yourself up, you lay down beside him, pulling him close to you. You convince yourself it’s just because it was cold and wanted some source of warmth, before closing your eyes and falling asleep.

#smut #top male reader #dom male reader #sub character #sub Toji #dom reader

[samandcolbyownme]

This was originally going to be just a Sam one shot, but then i decided to make it a Sam and Colby one shot. I felt like Sam's cover was too good to change, so enjoy the buy one get one free deal lol.

Summary: Reader drives herself insane trying to think of this mystery man she cannot stop thinking about and completely caught off guard when there's two of them.

Warnings: SMUT18+, vampire!Sam, demon!colby, compulsion and mind reading from both Sam and Colby, mentions of blood and blood drinking, strong language, mentions of alcohol, reading feeling like they're going insane, hair pulling, biting, scratching, choking, fingering, oral (m&f rec), threesome w/ dp, dirty and cute pet names, unprotected sex, creampie, filth

Word count: 10.3k | NOT edited

Not a request

Bold italics are Sam and Colby speaking in readers head.Regular italics are scenes they create in her head & reader being compelled at times.

╔═══━━━─── • ───━━━═══╗

Have you ever tried moving on from something that hasn't necessarily happened, but no matter how hard you tried, you just can't?

Your mind, constantly replaying stuff in your dreams, random times throughout the day.

Hitting you when you least expect it?

Then, when you finally think you've gotten over it, gotten rid of the haunting thoughts, it comes back, stronger than it was before?

That was you. Right now.

You had this feeling of anxiety, feeling like something was going to happen. It's happened multiple times a day, even causing you to wake up in the middle of the night, sometimes gasping for air.

But, you can never remember your dreams and nothing ever happens.

You could never describe the feeling.

Your friends would ask if you're okay because you looked 'tired' or you said no to doing something you always have said yes to.

They knew something was up, and so did you, but you just didn't know what was causing you to feel like this so it was always 'I didn't sleep well last night' or some other lame excuse that they could see right through.

"Are you sure you're okay?" Your friend, Cami asks, "You've been, not sleeping well, for the last week or so." She tilts her head, "What's really going on?"

You take a deep breath, "I honestly.." you pause, leaning forward to set your coffee mug down on the coffee table, "If I tell you, you have to promise not to call me crazy."

She nods, leaning back against the couch, "Okay."

You pinch the bridge of your nose, "So besides me not sleeping well, I'll get to that in a sec, but it started last week, after we came home from Tara's party."

"Did someone h-"

You cut her off, "No. no. It's not that."

She sighs, "Oh fuck, okay good." She motions, "Continue. Sorry."

You bat the air, "When I came home I felt like I was forgetting something, but I had everything I took with. I also felt.. I don't know, almost guilty for going and having a good time? Like, almost like I shouldn't have gone? I'd don't know."

She furrows her brows, "That doesn't make any senses. I mean, I just.." she stops, "it sounds like you're feeling emotions you'd feel when you're with someone and you did something you know they don't like."

You shrug, "I mean, yeah. It kind of does feel that way, but at the same time if I really think about it, it still doesn't make sense. I mean, maybe I think about it way too much, but-"

She cuts you off, "Are you talking to anyone? Maybe someone who is a potential boyfriend and you felt bad for going out?"

You look up at her, "That's where it gets crazy."

She gives you a weird look, "Huh?"

"I feel like- okay. You promised not to call me crazy, so just.. hear me out." You stare at her and she nods and you continue trying to explain, "I feel like.. I already belong to someone."

She makes a face and you hold your hand up, "I know. I know. I just, I can't. I can't explain it really. I mean, I keep seeing this person in my dreams and it almost feels like they're who I'm-"

You shake your head, "That sounds absolutely fucking insane. I take back what I said, you can call me crazy."  

You laugh, slightly embarrassed at what you just said.

This is the first time that you've actually talked about it out loud, and it sounds a lot crazier than you originally had thought.

"You're into reading books, right?" Cami asks and you nod, "Yeah, I'm actually reading one right now."

"What's it about?" She brings her legs up, moving the blanket to cover up. You purse your lips, "It's a darker romance book, so it's basically about a guy who comes at the most random times but he has a big secret and all that."

"What's he described as? Like what does he look like?" She brings her mug to her face and you shrug, "Um. I mean, like a normal looking guy. Slightly tall-ish. Blue eyes. At first he had brown hair, then he bleaches it to blonde, what does-"

"Who's the guy you see in your dreams?"

You stare at her, "Oh shit."

She chuckles, "I don't know about you, and now when I say this, I speak from experience because I'm sure we've all have done it, but it sounds like you're experiencing fictophilia."

"What the hell is that?" You laugh slightly at the last word she said, "fictophilia?"

She nods, "Yeah, it's where people, real people like us, fall in love with fictional characters in a book."

"Can it be as strong as taking over how you feel?" You ask, tilting your head, "Because when I tell you, I could have puked from feeling guilty that night, I was-" you hold up your thump and pointed, an inch from each other, "-This close."

She shakes her head, "No, I don't think it can cause that. I think you just drank a little, too much." She smirks, "Those back to back shots definitely had something to do with it."

You sigh, closing your eyes as you nod, "Yeah, yeah no. You're probably right. I'm just definitely over thinking about it."

"And the not getting sleep will definitely play a part in that. You need to take a nap. A real nap." She smirks, "and stop being delusional."

You roll your eyes, smirking as you nod, "Yeah, yeah. I know. But these fictional men, Cami. They'll getcha."

She nods as she stands up, "No I know. I watched a movie the other day and thought about the one character for three days straight."

"See. My point exactly." She laugh as you walk her over to the door. She turns, "I don't think you're crazy. Fictional characters happen to us all."

She leans in for a hug, "But if it gets to the point to where you tell me you're dating someone who isn't real, I'm funny farming your ass."

You laugh, leaning back as you look at her, "I won't put up a fight."

You close the door after she walks out, turning around to look at your empty apartment. You flick the lock before you walk over to the couch, sitting down to switch on the tv.

You put on the show you were watching and you can't help but think about your conversation with Cami.

It felt like so much more than what you told her.

It felt too real, but you really didn't want her to think you were losing it. That you were crazy.

But you felt it.

After multiple days of trying to figure out who the guy in your dreams is and not having any clue whatsoever is maddening.

Constantly telling yourself, I'm going crazy, each time you try hard to remember his face and about lose it because you can't.

You have a feeling that he wasn't just the guy in the book.

He was so much more than that, to you, in your head at least.

But, little did you know, that he was a creature who had such a pretty face, a dark, dark soul - along with his friend.

You shake your head, laying down and getting comfortable on the couch so you can try and take a well needed nap.

.·:*¨ ✘ ¨*:·.

You reach over the counter, smiling at the barista, "Thank you." She nods, moving on to hand out the next coffee.

You walk away, heading towards the door. You go to push it open but stumble out when someone on the outside opens it before you.

"Oh, shit." The guy lays an arm in front of you, stopping your stumble. You stand up straight, looking up at the blonde.

He smiles slightly, "Are you okay? I'm sorry. I didn't see you coming out."

You nod, laughing slightly, "Y-yeah. Yeah I'm okay. Thank you for opening the door for me." You smile at him and he shrugs, "Call it fate."

A loud thump causes you to jump awake. You sit up, slowly turning to look back over the couch. You blink a few times, trying to get your vision used to the darkness of your apartment.

You call out slight groggy, "Hello?"

No answer.

Your phone ringing causes you to jump and you let out a sigh as you look at it. You debated on not answering, mainly because you seen the movies.

You know how it goes.

But it was cami, so you answer, "Hello?"

"Hey, a bunch of us are going out tonight. Wanna join?" She asks, "We're going to bar hop." You bite your lip, quickly turning around when you feel a presence off to your left, "Uh, yeah. Yeah."

"You'll come?" She asks, excitement seeping from her words, "Great. We can all just meet up in the parking lot of your place and we can walk to Bar Eight."

"That's fine with me. I need a shower, I just woke up from a nap." You stretch your arm above your head, "you can come over whenever. I'll be here."

"I have to finish getting ready, too but I'll be over within the hour."

"Okay." You nod to yourself, "See ya." You pull the phone away from your ear and stand up. You walk over to the lamp, switching it on and from the corner of your eye, you can see a figure disappear.

"Oh fucking hell." You rub your eyes and sigh. You mentally tell yourself that it's the sleep deprivation or that you just need to distract yourself.

Maybe having people stay over after a night out will help.

You walk to the bathroom, switching the shower on and it quickly fills with steam. You undress, stepping in and sighing as the hot water washes over your body.

It feels like hands slid over your shoulders and you zone out.

You're walking down the street with Cami, having a small conversation. You're oblivious to the people walking towards you on the left side of the side walk.

Someone runs into your shoulder, knocking your purse off. It falls to the ground and some of your things spill out.

As you bend down, what you assume, is the guy who bumped into you, bends down to help you.

"Here. Let me help."

You look up, tucking hair behind your one ear as your eyes meet a guy with dark hair and blue eyes, "Oh, um. Thank you."

He nods, handing you the strap of your bag, "No need, I should watch where I'm going more often."

You laugh slightly, "Yeah, that probably wouldn't be a bad idea." He stands up and holds his hand out. You felt oddly trusting of him, so you take his hand to stand up.

"I'm Colby." He smiles and you nod, "I'm y/n."

You turn around quickly, wiping the water from your face as you only remember the hands on your shoulders, "what the fuck!"

You pull the shower curtain back, peaking out as if that was the smartest thing to do, "Go away."

Nothing in response.

You lean back into the shower and fix the curtain before doing your routine. As you're rising the conditioner out of your hair, you feel like there's eyes on you.

Like someone is watching.

You finish up, quicker than you thought, and step out.

You tilt your head at the neatly folded towel on the corner of the counter and stare at it, "Did I do that?"

You think hard but can't remember.

You grab it, snapping it open so you can wrap up your hair and put the other one around your body. You open the bathroom door, and nothing else seems out of ordinary as you step out.

You turn, walking into your room and going to your closet. You shift through the hangers, finding a cute top and a pair of ripped jeans.

You toss the towel down, quickly getting dressed before taking your hair down.

A very faint, she's so pretty, causes you to snap your head towards the door, "Cami?" You slowly scrunch your hair in the towel and shake your head, it's just the tv.

After a while, there's a knock on your door and you get up to go open it, "Hey guys. Come in." You smile as Cami and your other friends walk in, greeting you with smiles.

"I just need to grab my bag then I'm ready." You walk into your room, grabbing your purse and turning to walk out when you suddenly stop.

You don't know why you stop, but you just do.

Your mind goes blank for a second and then suddenly you're walking back out to your friends like nothing just happened, "Okay. I'm ready."

.·:*¨ ✘ ¨*:·.

"So do you come here often?"

You try not to roll your eyes at the cringey, overused pickup line, "I mean.. kind of?" You laugh slightly and sip your drink, "I only live a few minutes away."

Why would you say that? You don't know him.

Your brows furrow, "That was weird."

"What was weird?" The guy still standing infront of you asks, making you realize that you now just thought out loud, "Um, nothing. Nothing sorry. Continue."

"No." He laughs, "I like weird shit, tell me."

You sigh, smirking slightly, "Do you ever.. how do I say this." He shrugs with a smile, "Just say it."

"Do you ever feel like there's someone in your head but it's not you?" The words roll off your tongue and you instantly regret it, "Wait. No. That sounds awful."

He shakes his head, "No I know exactly what you mean."

No he doesn't.

You close your eyes, "Almost like it's someone trying to talk to you, but it's just.." you laugh, "Confusing. Weird. I don't know."

The guy nods, "I'm so glad someone else thinks the same as me."

You smile and that feeling hits again. Like you shouldn't be there. Like you're about to be sick, which can't be from the alcohol, you've only had three so far and they weren't your usual double shots.

"If you'll excuse me I need to g-" you walk away, leaving your drink at the bar. As you're walking towards the bathroom, someone steps back from the bar, too quickly for you to dodge them.

You run right into them and sigh, "Excuse you."

"I'm sorry, sweetheart."

You look up and a blonde guy is standing there. Something about him causes your curiosity to spike, "No.. it's fine. I was just-" you shake your head, "I'm sorry, is this is weird, but do I know you?"

He shrugs, "My name's Sam."

"Sam. Sam. Sam." You repeat to yourself a few times quietly, "No, sorry. I don't think I know a Sam."

"Hmm. Well maybe we can call it fate that you just happened to run into me like you did." He smirks and for some reason, his words cause you to straight up your posture, "first off, you weren't paying attention."

You smirk and tilt your head, "Second off, I swear we've had a conversation before. I just-"

"Can't think of it right now? That happens to me all the freaking time." He chuckles as he sips his drink, "Are you drinking?"

"I mean, I was. I left mine back there with a guy, I was on my way to the bathroom."

"Oh, shit. I'm sorry, are you with someone?" Sam asks and you shake your head, wanting to say yes because it really feels like it, but in reality, you're not.

"No, no. My friend just left me there and he appeared and yeah. Nothing serious, I don't even know his name."

Why are you defending yourself to someone you don't know, you think, "I'm y/n. I guess I should have told you that when you told me yours."

He smiles, "Pretty name, y/n." He motions to the bar, "Can I buy you a new one?" You smile, "I think I'd like that a lot, Sam."

You step up to the bar with him and Sam flags down the one bartender, "Whatever she wants. It can go on my tab, Golbach."

As you look up at him, you get this odd feeling of déjà vu.

"What?" He asks with a smirk and you shake your head, "You just.. remind me of someone I can't really remember."

"What?" He laughs, "Sorry, I don't mean to laugh I just-"

"No, no please laugh. I'm so awkward." You cover your face with one hand and he shakes his head, "I'm sorry." He moves your hand from your face, "I think you're beautiful."

You feel your cheeks heat up and he bites his lower lip, "Can I ask you a question?"

You nod, "Yes."

He leans in, eyes focusing onto yours, "You will answer yes to my question and not question anything else. Can you follow me to the bathroom so I can have a taste of you?"

You smile, "Yes."

"That was easy." He downs the rest of his drink and slides his hand down into yours, "Follow me, princess."

You leave your drink, mind only focusing on one thing right now and you absolutely were not questioning it.

He leads you to the back, pushing the door to the bathroom open and lets you walk in first. He follows behind you, shutting the door and locking it.

He stares at you for a few seconds, the only thing he's focused on right now is listening to your blood flow through your veins.

"You're going to taste so fucking good." He moves in front of you within a second, hands on your hips which guide you back to sit you on the sink's edge.

His eyes focus on yours again, "Don't make a sound."

All you do is nod, moving your eyes from him to the wall behind him as he dips his head down to press his lips to the side of your neck.

Your eyes flutter closed as he gently sucks a spot into your neck, tongue moving over your skin before lifting his head ever so slightly.

His grip tightens on your waist as his fangs emerge, eager to be sunk into your delicate skin.

"Ready?" Sam whispers and you nod silently. He smirks and your eyes go wide, hands sliding up and gripping the collar of his shirt as his teeth sink into your skin.

His groan is muffled by your neck and his hands pull you in closer to him.

Your hand lays on the back of his head, mouth parted in completely silence as your eyes flutter closed.

The feelings you get is pain mixed with the upmost euphoric pleasure.

As you open your eyes, you see a man leaning up against the wall, watching. You can't tell who he is, as your vision is kind of hazy.

Sam lifts his head a little, "Go away Colby."

The guy, who you presume as Colby now, chuckles, "Come on, who says you can have all the fun?" Sam stands up, licking his now red lips. He lifts a finger, wiping away the blood drop that's rolling down his chin from the corner of his mouth.

"You can have your fun later. This was my idea, so I get first dibs, remember?" Sam glances back at him and he walks up next to him, eyes on you, "She is so fucking beautiful."

"Ain't she?" Sam grips your chin, "You can talk now, but you're still not questioning anything."

You clear your throat, swallowing to relieve it from the dryness and Colby sighs, "Clean her blood up, Sam."

"Why?" Sam teases, "Smells good doesn't it?"

Colby shakes his head, "You know I don't have control like you do." Sam sighs, rolling his eyes as he wipes the blood from your neck with his thumb, "Scaredy cat."

He smears some of his blood on the open wounds, getting them to heal faster so he can cover his tracks before he brings his thumb to his lips.

You watch as he licks the red liquid from his skin, "Mm." He leans back slightly before leaning back in, his voice going quieter, "So fucking good."

He presses his lips to yours and the metallic taste of your own blood washes over your tongue.

"Alright. You gotta get her back to her friends, they're ready to go to another bar." Colby moves back, leaning against the wall and Sam nods, "Do you have any questions for me, sweetheart?"

You smile slightly, reaching out to grab his shirt with your hands, "You're coming with me."

He raises a brow, "Is that a demand?"

"Only if you want it to be." You bite your lip, staring up at him as you continue to smile at him. He sighs, "I'll find you, babe. I promise."

You nod, sliding down from the sink, "You better." As you go to walk towards the door, Colby clears his throat, "Sam."

Sam sighs, "Shit, right." Sam quickly moves between you and the door, "I promise I'll undo all of this later, but for right now.." he cups your cheeks with his hands, looking into your eyes, "Forget about what happened and what you saw. You're going to tell your friends that you used the bathroom and only remember me as Sam Golbach. A regular guy from the bar down the street."

Within a blink of an eye, they're both gone and you're left standing alone in the bathroom, "Guess I'm done here."

You walk out and your friends are standing in a group by the door, "There she is. We thought you left." Cami says reaching out to grab your hand.

"No, I was just using the bathroom." You smile, "Are we going to another bar?"

Cami nods, "We're going to go hang out at Electric Avenue." You groan, "Oh my god, I love that place."

She laughs, "Then what are we waiting for?" She wraps her arm around yours and as you leave Bar Eight, you can't help but feel like you're forgetting something.

Something that happened, but you can't quite put your finger on it. That sick feeling returns, but this time it comes with heartache.

Even though you're with your friends, you feel extra lonely right now. In this moment you just want to go home, curl up in bed and cry because you're missing something so bad right now, but if anyone were to ask, you can't give them an answer that sounds sane enough for them to not laugh or think you're not crazy.

Because let's face it, the fact that you're obsessing over someone or something that you have zero knowledge about, is pretty insane.

"ID's please." The bouncer says as you walk up. You dig into your purse and pull out your wallet, slipping your id from its holder.

He checks it over, handing it back to you to move onto Cami. You wait for her by the door and when she walks through, you link your arm with hers, pretending that you're not ready to run home.

"Shots. Please!" She yells over the music and you sigh, "I'll do one, maybe two."

"We'll see." She giggles as she pulls you with her to the bar and rests her arms on the tall counter.

"Well hello ladies." The bartender walks up, "I'm Blake, anything you need I'll be happy to serve it to you."

Cami giggles, "Thank you, Blake. I think.. to start off, we'll do-" she pauses for a second, "Six teq-"

"No." You say quickly and she sighs, "Fine. Six vodka shots."

Blake smirks, "You got it." He winks at you before walking away and Cami leans in, "He is so hot." You shrug, "He's alright."

"Alright? Are we seeing the same guy? Y/n. He's into you!" She nudges your side with her elbow, "Get his number."

If he, as so little as it may seem, gets your number, I will snap his neck in front of everyone.

"No." You snap at Cami, "I'm not giving him my number. And you aren't either."

She scoffs, "Is this about the little crush you have on that character in your book because if so-"

"Cami." You roll your eyes, "no it's not about that okay." She turns towards you, leaning against the bar, "Then what's it about? Hmm."

You sigh and right as you're about to give her some bullshit answer, a guy comes up beside you and wraps his arm around your waist, "It's about me."

You look up and your mood instantly switches, "Sam! There you are."

"Here I am." He smiles as he looks down at you, "I told ya I'd meet you here."

Cami shakes her head, "Wait." She points to Sam, "Who is this and when did you meet him?"

"Cami, this is Sam Golbach. A regular guy from the bar down the street." The words seem scripted to you, but you didn't really pay attention to that.

You felt safe. Complete. Almost like this is the meaning to your obsessing and empty fantasies.

"Why didn't you tell me? I thought you were talking to that other guy?" Cami tilts her head and you scoff, "You make it sound like I'm a whore, Cami."

She laughs, "Oh god, no. No, I didn't mean it-"

"It's fine." You laugh, "He knows about the other guy I was talking to. It just.. didn't work out."

Blake comes back and delivers the six shots on the tray. His eyes move to Sam, staying on him as he speaks, "Six vodka shots."

He walks away and Sam can't help but laugh, "I don't think he likes me."

"Well maybe it's because he was eyeing up your girl before you showed up." Cami grabs a shot and looks around for the others.

She waves them down, motioning for them to come over and they do. Singing along and dancing mildly to the music that's bumping through the club.

"Heyyy. Who's this?" Your other friend asks pointing to Sam. He leans forward, "I'm Sam."

"Sam. Sam. Sam." She laughs, clearly reaching her alcohol limit, and fast, "You gonna stick around?"

Sam nods, "I mean, yeah. I planned on it. At least until one of us-" he nods towards you, "- is ready to leave."

Your friend laughs, "No, no. I meant sticking around as in dating my girl here." Sam's brows raise and he nods, "I mean, yeah. Yeah. I plan on it, I mean. That's if she wants me to."

Your arm tightens around his waist and he smiles, "I think that's a yes." You nod, resting your head on his shoulder. As you're standing there, waiting for the shots to be distributed, you spot another oddly familiar face.

"Who's that guy over there?" You ask pointing across the bar. Sam leans down, "Which one, sweetheart?" You lean over slightly, "The guy next to the girl in the pink top."

"Oh that's Colby." Sam turns his head to look into your eyes, "You recognize him from back at the bar, he's a good friend of mine." Sam looks at you and you nod, "Oh okay. Yeah that makes sense. Maybe I do remember him."

Sam smiles and kisses your temple. He closes his eyes as he takes a deep breath, remembering what your blood tasted like on his tongue.

His hand grips your hip tight, loosening as he takes a shot glass from Cami, "Thank you."

You take yours and wait for Cami to tap hers against the bar. Everyone follows, tapping each glass against the wood before knocking them back.

Everyone cheers, pulling each other onto the dance floor. Sam takes your hand into his, pull you with him before spinning you around to press his chest against your back.

His hands slide down, gripping your waist as you move to the beat of the song. Your head rests back onto his shoulder and he rests his cheek against yours.

Your arm slides up, wrapping around his neck and you spin around to face him, your other arm moving up to interlock your hands behind his head.

"You're so beautiful." Sam says which causes you to smile. He brushes hair from your neck, subtly inspecting the now healed bite mark. He lick his lips, tilting his head as his eyes meet yours again.

"Does your friend need a dancing partner? I can send Cami over to talk to him?" You tilt your head and Sam chuckles, "Nah, I think he'll be alright."

"Girlfriend?" You ask and Sam shakes his head, "No."

"Oh, is he gay? My friend Curtis ca-."

Sam laughs, "No, no. He's not. He just.." he brushes hair from your face, "He has his eye on someone very special already."

"Good for him." You smile, pulling Sam closer. Sam nods, "Yeah, it really will be good for him." He leans in, lips connecting with yours and its sparks.

Bright sparks, hell. Those are fireworks.

"I don't want to leave you." You admit, "Sorry if that w-"

"I don't want to leave you, either." Sam cuts you off, lips connecting right back with yours. You lay your hand on the back of his back, sliding the other one down his chest and pushing away from him, "They're all coming back to my place, so I hope that doesn't change anything."

Sam shakes his head, "doesn't change a thing, baby."

.·:*¨ ✘ ¨*:·.

You giggle slightly to yourself as you dig for your keys, "I hope I grabbed them."

"I'm sure they're in there." Sam says giving you a smile. Cami pushes between the two of you, "Do you have them?"

Sam glances at her and back to you, "She's looking for them."

You look up at her, "Can you move your head, you're blocking the light." You try not to laugh but fail, causing her to laugh which spreads throughout everyone else.

Sam shakes his head and you pull out your keys, jingling them as you look back, "Found them."

They all cheer and you unlock the door, pushing it open before you drag Sam in with you.

You set your bag and keys on the counter before turning to face Sam, "Do you need a drink or anything?"

He licks his lips, brushing hair from your neck, "I do, but I'll get it then."

"I can get it fo-"

He cuts you off, "I'm fine, sweetheart." He smiles, "Come on, let's go sit." He takes your hand into yours and pulls you towards the couch.

You sit on his lap, looking back at Cami and your other friends who are raiding your fridge. She gives you a look and nods towards your room.

She walks over stopping at the door way, "Y/n, can you come help me unzip my dress."

You look back at her, "Oh yeah." You get up, sliding your hand along Sam's shoulders as you walk around the couch.

Cami pulls you into your room and shuts the door, her voice is quiet, "Don't you think.. Sam is.." she trails off and you tilt your head, "Sam is? What, Cami?"

She waves her hands in a circle, "I don't know, he seems a bit.. controlling."

You laugh slightly, "What do you mean?"

"The way he just pulled you over to the couch, I mean you were just trying to offer him a drink." She shrugs, "I don't know, it just.. you just met him, we just met him, and he's already back at your place?"

"I don't understand what you're saying? You do this all the time, cami." You cross your arms, "Do you want me to kick him out?"

"That's not what I'm saying at all, y/n. I'm just saying that I get a really weird vibe from him, he just.. he seems cold." She shrugs, sighing as she turns around, "Can you unzip me quick, though please?"

You roll your eyes, reaching up to quickly unzip the dress, "I know you're just trying to look out for me, but something about him just feels.. right."

She turns around, leaning down to grab her bag, "ultimately it's your choice at the end of the day, but I'm just saying be careful. I just didn't like the way he drug you over to the couch."

"I think you're being a little dramatic." You laugh, "Now change, and come out so we can watch a movie."

You walk over to your door, opening it to walk back over to the couch. Sam greets you with open arms as you sit back down on his lap, "Everything okay?"

You nod, "Yeah, her zipper was just stuck in some loose string from her dress."

You didn't have to lie, Sam already heard everything.

"Dress okay?" He asks and you nod. He plants a kiss to your cheek, "Good."

Cami walks back out, coming over to sit next to you, "So, what movie are we watching?"

"Something funny. Oh!" Cami snaps, "Why don't we watch Vampires Suck? Have you seen it?"

"Isn't that the movie that's based off of Twilight? Doesn't actually suck?" One of your friends say, and Cami nods with a smirk as she leans forward to grab the remote, "Yes, it is, and it's supposed to suck on purpose. That's the whole point."

Sam chuckles shaking his head, the thought of watching a bad vampire movie was so cliche to him.

Cami turns his head, leaning out to look at him, "Is that alright with you?"

He looks at Cami and nods, "Why wouldn't it be?"

"Cami." You sigh, "Just play the stupid movie." She sighs quietly and presses play, tossing the remote down next to her.

A little bit into the movie, you lean in to Sam, "I'll be right back, I have to go to the bathroom." He nods, giving you a smile as you get up.

You walk to the bathroom closing the door and as you look at yourself in the mirror, your mind shifts from Sam and you zone out.

"You're just.." Colby smiles, brushing hair from your face, "So pretty."

You smile, a blush rising onto your cheeks, "Thank you, Colby." He leans in, "I've honestly never come across anyone as pretty as you."

"Okay, now you're just saying stuff." You laugh and he shakes his head, "No, I'm not. I'm being serious. I've seen hundreds of faces, and yours is my favorite one of all."

You look away, laughing slyly, "Colby."

He grips your chin, turning your head back to face him, "I'm being so serious right now. I'd risk fighting Lucifer himself to be with you."

"Lucifer?" You question and Sam's voice pops up, "Colby. That's enough. Knock it off."

You look around, unable to spot Sam..

Your eyes focus on your figure in the mirror, blinking a few times before you continue to do what you went in there for.

You open the door, flicking the lights off as you walk out.

"Hey I think I'm going to head out." You look up at your friend as you sit down next to Sam and Cami, "Are you good to drive?"

They nod, "Oh yeah, I feel fine. I'll text you when I get home."

"Okay. Be careful." You smile and they nod as they walk out.

A little bit later, two more friends leave, then another one, leaving you with just Sam and Cami.

"Is it just me, or were they acting kind of weird?" You look between them and Sam shrugs, "I know they were getting tired, probably didn't want to have to sleep on the floor." He teases them reassures you, "I think they were good."

Cami yawns and stretches as she leans forward, "Yeah, I think I'm going to head home. I forgot I had an appointment early in the morning."

"But it's Saturday?" You question and she shrugs, "Yeah. There's one that has certain hours."

"Oh." You nod, "Okay." Your eyes follow her as she gets up, walking over to grab her back, "I'll talk to you tomorrow. Love you!"

"Yeah, okay. Love you, too." You watch her shut the door and then you slowly look over at Sam, "That was so weird."

"Maybe they just settled down, got tired from the alcohol?" Sam suggests and you shrug, "I mean, yeah. You're right." You laugh, "Sorry I'm just-"

There's another thump, almost like the same one at earlier on in the day.

"That happened earlier." You look back, "Hello?"

"Maybe it's your neighbors?" Sam stands up, "I'll go check, maybe someone else did leave."

You nod, turning around to watch as he walks back to check the rooms. He comes out of your room and shakes his head, "No one's here."

You nod, continuing to watch as he then gets this annoyed look on his face and he sighs, "Fine."

"Sam?" You slowly get up, "Who are you talking to?"

"No one, I just-" he laughs, "I have something to tell you."

Your heart starts racing and you feel like your chest gets heavy, "Oh god." Your mind starts racing through every single idea that could potentially happen.

He had a plan this whole time. Gain your trust, get your alone, murder you.

He chuckles, "Relax, sweetheart. I'm not going to murder you."

Your head snaps towards him and you point, "H-how did you-"

"I can read your mind."

His words catch you off guard, "Y0u ju- you can r-" he pause, closing your eyes as you rest your forehead in your hand, "What the fuck is hap-"

You look up, gasping when Sam is right in front of you, "Shit." You go to step back but Sam grabs your wrist.

As scared as you want to be, when he touches you, it's like all your fear washes away and you want to do anything in your power to keep him with you.

"Listen to me." Sam's voice is soft, "I have to tell you something, but I need you to not freak out." He looks into your eyes, "Okay?"

You nod your head, "Y-yeah. I guess I can try."

"Come." He motions towards the couch, "Have a seat."

You walk over, sitting down. You turn your body towards him and rest your hands in your lap. Sam leans back, casually extending his arm over the back, "I made your friends go home."

"Huh?" You tilt your head, "What do you mean you made them leave?"

He shrugs, "Because we were getting impatient and they were just being massive cockblocks."

You sit in silence as you try to process his words, "We?"

Sam nods, "Yeah, remember Colby from the bar?" You nod slowly, "um, yeah. Yes." Sam nods, "Well he's here, too."

You whip around, looking for him, but you don't see him, "Where?" You turn back around, heart racing faster, "Why is he here, too?"

Sam stares at your chest, biting his lip as he pushes the thirst for your blood out of his mind, "You can't see him, he's hiding himself."

"Hiding himself?" You run your hand through your hair, breathing out a quiet, "Fuck."

After a moment of silence, Sam speaks up, "Do you want to know what happened at the bar?"

"I know what happened at the bar. I met you, we talked had a drink, I went to the bathroom then came out and walked with my friends down the street to another club." You look at him and he smirks, "No, sweetheart. Do you want to know what really happened?"

"What really happened?" You question and Sam leans forward, looking into your eyes, "When you remember, you won't make a big deal about it."

You nod and Sam tilts his head, eyes still on yours, "Remember."

You freeze as your mind plays what actually happened at Bar Eight.

Sam compelling you to say yes to his question. Following Sam to the bathroom. Sitting on the edge of the sink and being told not to make a sound.

His teeth sinking into your neck and you can almost feel the pleasured pain he caused you as he sucked your blood from your neck.

Colby emerging from behind Sam as your vision goes hazy.

Everything flows if, filling the cracks with missing information and you're left speechless.

You blink, your eyes moving to look at Sam. The only words you can form leave you more shocked as they leave your lips, "Y-you're.. a vampire?"

Sam smiles, nodding his head as he leans forward to rest his elbows on his knees, "Correct."

"And Colby?" You raise your brows and Sam tilts his head, "He's a demon."

"A de-" you shake your head, "No. I'm dreaming I can't- this can't be real." You stand up, placing one hand on your forehead and the other on your hip, "I'm having a really, really weird dream."

"Hate to break it to ya, babe." Colby's voice startles you as he walks around from behind you. You jump, stepping back as you look at him. He holds his hand out, "I'm sorry. Didn't mean to scare ya."

He chuckles, "But you're not dreaming. You're awake, and we're here."

You slide your hand down, resting your fingers over your lips and your mind starts racking up questions.

"Yes, we're why you felt guilty after going to Tara's party." Colby nods, "And why you felt so obsessed over, well.. nothing really."

"It wasn't really nothing, y/n. We made it so you were, what? Colby. I don't even know what you'd call it." Sam looks to Colby and Colby purses his lips, "Mm."

He snaps his fingers and looks to you, "Love sick."

"We made you love us, without even knowing us. That's why you felt so comfortable with me at the bar, we'd basically manipulate your dreams so you'd know who we were, but someone.." Sam trails off, glaring at Colby before looking back to you, "Thought it would be best if we made it so you couldn't remember when you woke up."

You can feel your legs shaking below you, "And the making me do things? What.. what's that?"

"Oh the compulsion?" Sam nods, "Yeah, that's my favorite thing about being a vampire." He laughs, "I can make anyone do anything I wanted."

"So you.. compelled me.. to.." you point to your neck and he nods, "Yes."

"Why?" You stare at him and he shrugs, "Come on, if a stranger came up to you and said follow me to the bathroom, I want to bite your neck and drink your blood, would you have honestly, willingly gone with?"

"I mean, no but- wait." You point to Colby, "You don't like my blood?"

He sighs, "Ah, yeah. That."

"He could rip you apart if he really wanted to." Sam laughs and Colby rolls his eyes, "So could you, Sam."

Sam nod, leaning back to bring one of his legs up to least on his other one, "That's true. I could tear you apart if I wanted."

Sam is in front of you within the blink of an eye and you lean back slightly. His arm snakes around your wait, hand planting on the small of your back, "But I think you are just.. the sweetest thing."

There is absolutely no fear in your body, and they both know it.

"Why me?" You ask, your breathing growing faster as Sam slides his other hand up your arm to push your hair out of the way, "Why not you?"

His fingers run over the spot he had previously drank from before, "You have such a pretty face, on a pretty neck. You drive me crazy."

He leans in, lips gently pressing against your skin before tilting his head up, "Tell me you don't want me right now. Tell me you don't want us.. right now."

"I-I." You gasp as you feel Colby appear behind you, his hands sliding onto your waist. You bite down on your lip, "Are you going to hurt me?"

"Not unless you want us to, baby." Colby chuckles, "We're here to pleasure you. Make you feel things you've never even thought of feeling."

Colby presses his chest against your back and Sam tilts his head, "We don't take orders from anyone.." his thumb brushes over your bottom lip, "But you."

A rush of excitement washes over you and they both chuckle, "she's excited." Colby whispers, "I can feel it."

"This is so fucking weird." You laugh, still slightly in shock, "Oh my god."

"What do you say, sweetheart." Sam looks into your eyes, "Will you let us be your sickening desire?"

Your lips part open as Colby's lips attach to your neck, sucking a mark into your neck.

You had to admit, the devils voice is so sweet to hear.

Along with them being pretty cute for being, what others would consider monsters.

"You think we're cute?" Sam teases and you sigh, "My thoughts aren't safe anymore are they?"

Sam shakes his head, "Not at all, babe."

"You share them with us now." Colby whispers, "So are you going to answer Sam's question. Are you going to let us show you what an exhilarating ride it is to dance with the devil?"

After taking a moment to think, your eyes meet Sam's and you nod, "Take me."

"As you wish." He lifts you up, walking over to the couch, "But before we start. Can I have that drink now?"

"So that's what you meant?" You bite your lip and he nods, "Uh huh. Exactly." He looks over at Colby and when you look over at him, he's gone.

Sam turns your chin back towards him, "He's not too far off." He winks and slides his hand to the back of your neck, pulling you in closer to him as he leans up, mouth close to your neck.

Your hands grip the collar of his shirt, preparing for the initial piercing of your skin.

"Tell me when. You call the shots." Sam whispers and you nod, "Go."

You let out a whine, tilting your head to the side as his fangs sink into your neck.

Your fists tighten with his collar still balled up in them, and a moan slips through. Sam wraps tightens his arm around your waist, groaning against your neck.

The euphoric feelings rushes in, causing your arousal to spike.

You need him, and you needed him bad.

Your mind dances off onto the topic of Colby, thinking about how good he looks in the black leather jacket.

How his dark demeanor intimidates you, but also turns you on more than anything.

"Fucking hell, babe. You taste fucking good." Sam leans back, fangs still out as his licks the blood from his lips.

Your eyes gaze over his face as you slide a hand up, wiping away a bead of blood that's getting ready to drip. You drag your finger up his chin, slowly placing it in his mouth and you gasp when his lips wrap around it, sucking your flood off your finger.

"I know I should be scared but.." you bite your lip, pulling your finger from his lips, "I'm not."

"We don't want you to be scared." Sam whispers, "We love you."

Without any hesitation, "I love you both."

"That's the way we want it." He smirks, looking over your shoulder, "You good, Colbs?"

"Oh yeah." Colby answers from behind, "Clean her up. I want my turn with her." Sam smirks and licks his lips again before leaning forward.

A shiver goes down your spine from Colby's words and Sam's tongue gliding over the fresh puncture wounds.

A little whimper leaves your lips, "Please."

"Soon baby." Both say in unison.

"Stand up for me, princess." Sam says and you stand up, slightly wobbly. Colby moves behind you, sweeping you off your feet, "You'll get used to that the more it happens."

You stare up at him, captivated by how a demon can look so pretty.

"I'm not in my true form, sweetheart." Colby smirks, walking you into your room, "Maybe one day I'll show you."

"What do you look like?" You ask and Colby lays you on the bed, "Let's not talk about that right now." He licks his lips, pressing them to yours.

Your hands move to his neck, moaning quietly against them. He slides a hand down, slipping it under your shirt, earning a moan as he toys with your nipple.

You tilt your head back, arching your back as he pinches a bit harder.

You wonder where Sam is, and he instantly appears next to you, "I'm right here, princess." He smirks down at you and you bite down on your lip.

You had so many emotions flooding through your mind and body.

You have never, never felt like this before and that was part of their goal.

Colby slips his hand out, gripping your shirt at the top and tearing it with a smooth glide, exposing your chest, "Mm. Naughty girl, not wearing a bra."

You bite your lip, looking down at him and he smirks, "I like it better when you don't." He winks and leans down, attaching his lips to one nipples while his fingers find the other.

A moan leaves your lips as you lay a hand on the back of his head, "Fuck."

Sam leans down slightly, laying a hand on your head and brushing it over your hair, "We've been watching you for a while now. Did you know that?"

"N-no." You whimper and Sam chuckles, "Of course not. We didn't want to make you love sick, we just needed a way to make you ours before we told you who we truly are."

Colby leans up, "You're the only sense of humanity we have."

"Really?" You look from him to Sam and Sam nods, "Really." You look back to Colby as you feel your jeans being unbuttoned. You lift your hips, eager for them to be off quicker.

Sam stands up, unbuttoning his shirt as Colby works on undressing you fully, "Shit, this is so fucking hot."

Colby smirks, chuckling as he slides his hands up your bare legs, stopping at the band of your panties, "You're more than ready for us, aren't you?"

You nod quickly, "Yes." You move your hips up and down, "yes."

"Taste her, Colby." Sam commands and with that, your panties are ripped from your body, tossed like nothing to the floor.

"Fuck." Colby groans, quickly getting into position with his head between your thighs. Your lips part as you watch his inch closer to you, biting down on your lip when he glances up at you.

He closes the space, his tongue gliding up and down your folds, groaning against you as he finally tastes what he's been anticipating.

Sam's eyes are heavily focused on Colby, watching as he eats you out, "Fuck." He whispers, hand sliding down to palm himself.

You slide your arm towards him while placing your other hand on Colby's head, moaning as your back arches, "S-Sam."

Sam's eyes move to you, instantly picking up on what you want to do for him. He discards his pants, his boxers quickly following, leaving him naked as he climbs on the bed.

He sits on his knee, resting back on his calves as he reaches down. His fingers wrap around your wrist, guiding it to wrap around his cock.

He lets out a relieving moan, bucking his hips as you squeeze and gently stroke him up and down, "F-fuck."

His chest rises and falls quickly as his eyes watch you touch him.

You look over, locking eyes with him as you moan. He focuses on yours, "Cum."

Your body tenses up as a wave of absolute pressure washes over your body, screaming out as you tug on Colby's hair, which earns a deep groan from him.

"That's it, princess." Sam moans, "Fuck."

You catch your breath, watching as Colby sits up. He moves up, attaching his lips to yours and you moan at the taste of yourself on his tongue that moves against yours.

Sam grabs your wrist, pulling it away from him as he moves to the end of the bed. Once Colby climbs off, Sam grabs your ankles, easily pulling you down so your legs hang down.

You watch as Sam drops to his knees, hooking his arms under your knees as he moves in. His tongue slips into you, groaning as you gasp, "Sh-it."

Colby gets onto the bed, biting his lip as he watches you take his cock into your hand without being told, "Such a good girl." He reaches down, running his thumb over your bottom lip.

You part them, taking his thumb into your mouth and sucking. He tilts his head, watching the sight below him.

He looks down at Sam, watching him devour you before looking back, "Use your mouth, baby."

You comply, you don't need any kind of compulsion to do anything.

It's all you.

You push his thumb out of your mouth with your tongue, lifting your head to allow the tip of his cock to replace it.

He gasps, moaning as he lays a hand on the back of your head, "More, baby. Take more of me."

You swirl your tongue, coating him in saliva before you push your head onto him more. You moan around him as Sam slips a finger into your soaked cunt, tongue swirling around your clit.

Colby fights to keep his eyes open, "Shit." He pushes your head down, holding it there as he thrusts his hips, "Doing so fucking good."

Your back arches and your moans are muffled. Colby holds still, allowing you to have control again.

You bob your head, pausing as Sam slips another finger in, curling them slowly as he sucks your clit.

"Fuck." Colby glances down at Sam and back to you, brushing hair from your face. You tilt your head back, taking a deep breath as you moan loudly.

Colby moves back a little, leaning down to whisper in your ear, "Cum."

You whimper as your orgasm rushes in again, ripping loud moans and screams from your throat as you cum around Sam's fingers.

"Does that feel good?" Colby asks stroking his hand over your hair, "Looks like it does."

"Yesyesyes!" You scream out, "Fuck yes!"

Sam pulls his fingers out, standing up to lean down over you. Your eyes lock into his as he slips his two fingers into your mouth, "lick them clean for me."

Your tongue swirls around his fingers, sucking them clean like he said. He drags them out, pulling your bottom lip down slightly as he leans down to kiss where he bit a not, too long ago.

He reaches up, gripping your chin as he studies your face, "I want to drink from you while Colby fucks you from behind."

You nod, "P-please, Sam."

"You don't have to beg, princess. Not this time." He smirks and stands up, walking around to lay on the bed, "Come here."

You sit up, turning around to crawl up the bed, straddling his lap. Colby moves behind you, hands on your hips as you lean down to connect your lips with Sam's.

You feel spit run down over your center, followed by Colby's cock rubbing it in before slipping the tip of his cock in.

You gasp into Sam's mouth and both of their hands hold your body still, "Feel good?" Sam asks lowly and you nod, eyes closed as you moan, "So good."

Sam kisses down the front of your neck, licking back up to under your jaw, "Think you can take both of us at once?"

His words surprise you and he chuckles, "Only if you want to try of course."

Colby pushes his cock into you, groaning as his fingers dig into your hips, "Shit." He bites down on his lip, slowly pulling out before starting to thrust at a slow pace.

You moan, looking down at Sam. He watches your face scrunch up as he slides his hand up to your neck, slowly squeezing.

"fuck, I can't fight it anymore." Sam groans as he pulls your hair back into a make shift ponytail, holding it with his hand, "Stay as still as you can for me, okay?"

You whimper in response, moaning from Colby's cock thrusting in and out of you.

Sam licks his lips, tilting his head to get to the side he hasn't bit yet. He pulls you in close and sinks his fangs into your neck.

You let out a small yelp, quickly covering it up with a loud moan. You fist the sheets next to Sam, pulling in them as you try to stay as still as you can.

Colby's grip on your hips is tight enough to where you know you'll have small round bruises from his fingers digging into your skin.

Sam sucks your neck, moaning lowly as lifts his head slightly. His eyes flick down to your neck, "I'll never get enough of you."

"I'm yours." You moan out quietly, "Both of yours."

"Who do you belong to?" Colby asks, "Say it louder."

Sam reconnects his mouth to your neck, making your vision go blurry, "Y-yours." You moan, screaming out, "Both, I belong to you both."

"That's our girl." Colby groans, "Our fucking girl."

Sam lifts his head, licking your neck clean and lays his head back. You stare down at him as Colby's thrusts come to a stop.

Sam reaches down, grabbing his cock to slide it into your cunt along with Colby's.

You let out a whimper as you feel yourself stretching to accommodate them both, "F-fuck." You hang your head down, whimpering as they both start to thrust, quickly finding a pace.

Sam slides his hand back up, cupping your cheek, "Tell us how good you feel."

"So.. fucking.." you gasp, "Good!"

"Do you want to cum?" Colby asks and you answer him immediately, "Yes, yes. So bad." A string of whines and moans leave your lips non-stop.

"Little bit longer baby." Colby rubs his hand up and down your back, "Doing so good for us."

Your eyes scan quickly over Sam's face. There's just something about the blood covering his chin that turns you on even more.

"Thank you." He groans out with a smirk. You smile, biting your lip as your brows furrow, "Oh fuck. Fuck."

"Think she's had enough, Colbs?" Sam asked eyes not leaving your face.

"She's earned a break." Colby answers and Sam pinches your chin between his pointer and thumb, "Look at me, princess."

You open your eyes and he locks his onto yours, "Cum."

Pleasure washes over you, causing your body to shake as it feels much more powerful than the last two orgasms you had.

You feel their cocks slip out of you and you cling to Sam, moaning and whining as you work your way through your high.

"That's it, baby. That's it." Sam whispers as he plants kisses on your face, leaving little spots of blood.

You slowly relax, breathing heavy as you roll off of Sam to lay on the bed.

"You know. You look so cute with blood on your face." Sam leans over and smiles down at you. You laugh slightly, too tired to even care.

You feel someone one wiping you off and Sam comes back with a clean face and something to wipe yours off with.

You didn't think they would do this, you thought they were just going to have their way with you and leave.

"Just because we're labeled as not good doesn't mean we don't care about the aftercare part." Colby smirks slightly and you smile, "Sorry."

"Don't be sorry, sweetheart. You have a lot to learn." He winks and pulls the blankets up over your legs, "And yeah, that means we aren't going anywhere."

"Mhm. We claimed you." Sam says lying next to you, he brushes hair from your face, "so does it all make sense now?"

You nod, looking between them, "oh yeah. Everything is so much clearer now."

"You're still in shock aren't you?" Colby asks and you bat the air, "not at all." He raises a brow and tilts his head, "We can tell how you're feeling, babe. No need to lie."

You sigh, "Okay, fine. Maybe a little bit."

Colby lays next to you on your other side and rubs your arm, "Do you have any questions for us?"

"Were those thuds I heard earlier, you guys?" You ask as you pull the blanket up a little more. Sam laugh, "Yeah, that was Colby accidentally knocking stuff over."

You laugh, "This is just.." you sigh, "I'm sure I have more questions, I just.. my brain right now is so scrambled."

"You're fine, princess." Sam smiles, "You need rest."

"Will you be here in the morning?" You ask and look between them. Sam nods and Colby smiles, "We're always with you."

Sam smirks, "You have claim on us now."

.·:*¨ ✘ ¨*:·.

I hope you enjoyed this as much as I did and let me tell you, it was A LOT. So let me know how I did!

Likes and reblogs are majorly appreciated!

Taglist: @fawned01 @theblackcatwitch @jaeyuns-world @littlec0ffeegirl @rosie-writings @nikkiwastaken

#samandcolby-ownme #sam and colby #sam and colby one shots #colby brock #sam golbach #dirty one shot #smut #sam and colby smut #one shot smut #colby brock smut #solby x reader smut #solby smut #vampire!sam golbach x reader #demon!colby x reader #vampire!sam golbach #demon!colby brock #dirty colby brock oneshots #sam golbach dirty one shots #colby brock dirty one shots #sam golbach dirty #smutty one shot #smut writer #Love sick #updates #original one shot

[luveline]

ooh yay okay short blurb idea!! stevie comforting anxious!reader with back rubs? I feel like he gives the best calming back rubs ever!!! need him to help me w my anxiety :( 🤍🤍🤍

It's not that Steve's presence alone can stave off your anxiety, he's not a miracle, though he is miraculous, but it doesn't take long without him to fall into unhappy thoughts. He leaves to shower and you worry about everything one ache at a time, hands braced on your knees, begging your body to just let it go this time. Just this one time. 

You listen to the shower running, glad for the noise to hide your breath as it begins to wind, but Steve is quick. A minute later he's turning off the water, and a minute after that he's propping open the door to the ensuite to let out the hot air. His hair is still dry. He only wanted a refresher after the hot weather. 

You squeeze at nothing, your hands aching from the scrunch and unscrunching of your fingers. Steve must sense it, your quiet hurting, because he looks up with that resigned concern already lining his mouth, lips pulled down into an unfortunate frown. 

"Hey," he says, pulling the last sock on, "I'll be right there." 

The distance between you is relatively small and huge nonetheless. "It's okay," you say. 

You're wheezing. Steve's eyebrows furrow, and he grabs his glasses off of the night table as he sits down beside you. They slip down his damp nose and fog a little from the heat of his skin, which is a nice distraction until you realise it's a distraction. 

"Can I touch you?" he asks quietly. 

You nod quickly. Sometimes the panic is too much, and anyone's touch feels like a burn, but right now it's the one thing you want. Steve slides right up to your side, thigh to thigh, elbow to elbow. He slides the arm closest to you behind your back to hold you, and the other comes over his lap to your leg, where he squeezes the soft fat of your inner thigh. 

"What is it?" he asks. 

"I think…" you breathe in until your chest feels like it'll pop. "An attack." 

"Okay," he says, pulling you that last bit closer. You're like one person.

You lean forward away from him without thinking. Steve doesn't follow, but his hand tracks a heavy weight on your back. He starts to draw as he usually does when this happens, long fingers and a soft palm roving up the length of your spine and down again, filling the dip of your back as his voice melds to a whisper. "It's okay. We have to ride it out, that's all. You know that already. Keep breathing, babe." 

You cover your face with your hands. Steve makes a small sorry sound and takes your wrist, pulling your hand from your mouth.  

"Just breathe, honey." 

It's not easy. Not as simple as just, but you breathe. Steve's hand is dutiful and loving as it goes, tracing the same path over and over again. He whispers every now and then when you hold your breath or show signs of cracking, and when your eyes fill with tears his touch turns especially tender. 

People forget how full of love Steve is. He wants to love people, even if he does get annoyed at everything. Everything, and yet never at this. This is where his patience lies. 

Your back starts to feel ticklish from his touching. It works better than intended, one uncomfortable feeling replacing the other slowly. Steve puts his second hand on your chest to feel your pulse, his pinky finger sliding under the neckline of your shirt. He counts under his breath. 

"Good," he murmurs, pulling out his hand. "Good job, baby. You're okay." 

The attack ends, the shaky aftermath begins. You feel weak from hyperventilation, hands still shaking. Steve wraps you up in his arms now you're in no danger of suffocation to hold you together, pulling your face to his neck, his cheek turned from you as he sighs in relief. "You're okay," he says again. "That was a sudden one, huh? You okay?" 

You manage a soft laugh. "I thought you already decided." 

"It's two different okays." He rubs the top of your shoulder with his thumb, leaving warmth in his wake. "I know from your heart that you're okay, but are you okay? You know. What do you need me to do?" 

You hug him weakly. "Nothing. I don't need… Thank you, Steve." He's done more than you could ever ask for. 

"You're welcome," he says, kissing your cheek twice, his words warm and quiet against your skin. "Don't mention it. Just glad you're feeling better." 

#steve harrington x reader #steve harrington x you #steve harrington x y/n #steve harrington #steve harrington fic #steve harrington blurb #steve harrington drabble #stranger things x reader #stranger things fic #steve harrington imagine #steve harrington fanfic #steve harrington fanfiction #stranger things #stranger things 4

[chosos-mascara]

a piece of advice

𝙮𝙪𝙪𝙩𝙖 𝙤𝙠𝙠𝙤𝙩𝙨𝙪 𝙭 𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙙𝙚𝙧

𝘀𝘂𝗺𝗺𝗮𝗿𝘆 - after you offer condom advice to yuta, you put forward a second suggestion.

𝗰𝗼𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗻𝘁 𝘄𝗮𝗿𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴𝘀 - condom + lube use, fem reader, soft sex, yuta has a big p

2.6k words

Yuuta wasn't a virgin. In the midst of his twenties, he'd had enough encounters and experiences, times in which protection had been of course used, though provided for him. There was one thing on his list of sexual endeavors that he hadn't done, and that had been purchasing his own condoms. 

With that in mind, he'd been standing with basket in hand, pacing the medicine isle within his local supermarket - an embarrassing buy he'd felt inclined to make. Toge had been encouraging him into the dating scene after strings of one night stands and situation-ships, a promise of setting the raven haired male up with his cute friend. There was only one hurdle until his scheduled date, and that had been within one of many boxes before him. He needed to prepare. 

One step over the other, an antsy stumble as an uncomfortable sheen of sweat coated his body. Yuuta sighed when looking up to the shelves, eyeing options and colourful packages decorated in awkward phrases; for her, ribbed for pleasure... the list continues. Each helpless reach toward a decision had been disrupted almost as soon as his clammy hand would lift, a person edging too close to the isle he'd been panicking within A swift withdraw and turn to opposing direction would be the result of his anxiety, and Yuuta would be left back at square one. 

Through this routine, Yuuta's stresses focused elsewhere, he hadn't noticed a recurring face passing every few minutes, the same pair of eyes watching as his brow furrowed over, as his fingers grazed shiny cardboard and gaze locked onto one package. 

At first, you'd watched the stranger through morbid curiosity; an attractive guy around your age looking at condoms? It had been that of human nature that had driven you to watch him make a decision, to fantasise over his fingers as he'd roll it over himself, positioning his ache to soothe yours. 

Would he buy ribbed, or focus on her pleasure? Or, with his anxious nature, you'd guess there'd be a chance he'd go for extra safe. When watching him finally reach out, you'd clenched your thighs in anticipation, a giddiness within you to witness his choice first hand, anticipation pooling with arousal within the pit of your stomach as his fingers had almost wrapped around a box - though he'd ripped them away much faster when another stranger had turned the corner. His black head of hair had blurred as he span into the other direction, raised arm flying to the back of his neck as his fingers scratched at the skin nervously. 

It had been the fourth failure that had finally driven you to take a step forward - to put him out of his misery and allow the situation to rest. At first, he'd watched your movements from the corner of his eye, though as you'd grown closer to his personal space than previous strangers had, he'd cautiously met your eye. The nervous look painted on his face had accompanied a thick swallow and sheepish smile as he stepped backward, hoping you'd simply pass by. 

"Are they for your girlfriend?" The question had been spoken with confidence as you'd turned to him, an arm crossing the other as he tensed up, forced smile dropping to a frown.  "W-what?" He'd stuttered in shock as he followed your raised finger with hesitancy. You had in fact pointing toward the rows of condom boxes shelved before him. "Well, there's a lot of choices, aren't there?" You'd spoken with ease, a light hearted tone to soothe his worries. "Have you used one before?"  The male's face relaxed with your friendly demeanour, though it had felt as if the ground was swallowing him whole. 

"Uh," He cleared his throat, hand returning to the back of his neck once again, meeting the spot you'd watched him rub raw over the course of his endeavour. "I've used them before - just never bought them." The statement had ended in a raise of your brow, and a churn in the pit of his stomach.  "Hm, can I offer advice?" You gestured toward the more elaborate forms of protection; ribbed, thin, dotted and heated. "You don't need things like this. If you care about her pleasure, just learn where the clitoris is." Your finger moved, pointing at flavoured condoms with a frown. "Personally, I don't get the appeal, unless you're planning on only having oral." 

Yuuta swallowed back a thick lump within his throat at that statement. 

Finally, you placed a palm over box, fingers wrapping around edges and lifting package out, facing it toward the attractive stranger. His dark blue eyes drifted over the writing, body slouched.  "These are fine for your first buy. They're standard, lubricated, and safe." You pushed the pack toward him, and finally, he held it between his fingers. He glossed over the back before clearing his throat and glancing back to the array of condoms before him, stray orbs finally slowing over bigger sizes, pointing toward a black box with gold writing, large written clearly on the front. 

"I think these might be better - they're normal too, right?" A pink tint had tickled his skin as he spoke, the smile over your face causing his breathing to pick up a pace, heart racing. You hadn't meant to let the giggle pass your lips, but it had, and Yuuta had appeared all the more uncomfortable.  "Size doesn't matter, you know? The normal ones will do fine." You'd tried to reassure him, though he'd opened his mouth, a quiet stuttering before he'd fought back.  "I don't think they'll fit." 

"Uh," Now, it had been your turn to shift uncomfortably, fingers finding the hem of jumper before contemplating your next question, and the appropriateness of asking a complete stranger for their dick size in the middle of your local supermarket. You'd wondered how to approach the inquiry, instead opting to take the box back from his grasp, fingers ghosting his. "It says on the back that they're 7 inches long. You should be okay."

Yuuta stirred, a dry cough pushed through throat as heat rose his body. What had already been an extremely embarrassing interaction had somehow grown worse as his brain had buffered, lips unmoving. When he'd watched the pretty girl pass his isle, he'd felt slightly uneasy; but when she had in fact stopped to approach him with advice he'd felt a thousand times more humiliated. And now, having you insist on a condomsize he'd known wouldn't fit both girth and size he'd endowed had left him with two options: the first had been to blindly accept the recommendation and buy the incorrect size, or the second; to tell you he'd been above average. 

For whatever reason, he'd decided on the second. 

"Well-" He'd stammered, before specifying. "I'm eight and a half." Yuuta hadn't been aware that his protest had caused your thighs to clench, tight muscles causing friction as a startled hum left your lips. You hadn't been entirely sure if the outward sound had been that of pleasure or surprise. 

"Oh." A short response to voice your surprise and detract from the small sound you'd made a few seconds before had been the only thing you could muster, mostly relishing in awkwardness.  

In reality, the honesty he'd spoken had only led you to feel more attracted to him. His relaxed outfit and pretty hair had been the first thing to catch your eye, and then a cute face - but now, you'd felt your little crush morph into desire, a need to have him between your legs to help fill an ache he hadn't known existed.

The black box had been dropped into his basket, a readjustment of the other items to retain some modesty as he'd finished his shopping. You'd smiled as he thanked you for the help, and watched him walk to the other end of the store while you'd taken your, in comparison, sparse basket to the tills, paying up and leaving.

When outside, bag over arm, you'd contemplated two options. You had felt desperation to speak with him once more and to get his number in your phone, or maybe it had been to have his face between your thighs. In thought, you slumped back to the store's outer wall, a sigh leaving chest. Were you really going to embarrass yourself like this? To ask a man you were almost sure had been in some sort of relationship considering his purchase history - would you milk the slim chance of him being single?

Minutes had passed, and with time, rational thought had taken hold of you, gripping each shoulder to scream into your face. What were you doing out here? 

Pushing from the brick, shaking head, you took a step forward to make your way back home - most likely involving an evening of yourself and vibrator. Only, two steps forward with your head down had you close to lunging into another person - him. 

"Are you following me?" He had asked with small smile, another scratch to the back of his neck. Your expression of shock had seemingly concerned the raven haired male, his forced laughter dying out as he placed his hands into his pockets, a white plastic bag hanging from wrist. 

"Do you have a girlfriend?" The contents of his bag had been all you'd needed to spark the question, and he'd been goggling awkwardly once more.  "No - why?" The awkward laughter had returned at the end of his sentence, eyes trailing from yours to instead ghost over the pavement at your feet. 

"I-" You cleared your throat. "You were buying condoms, so I thought..." Trailing off, you'd mentally cursed yourself for the situation at hand.  "A friend of mine wanted to set me up with someone he knew." The stranger's explanation had been realistically unneeded, though you'd appreciated his specification - enough to prompt further questioning.  "So - do you have anyone to use those condoms with?" 

His gaze left the pavement and met yours before he'd replied.  "No." 

"Want me to help you with that?"

Yuuta followed you into your bedroom, white shopping bag still over hand as you turned to face him. The accessory was cute, but had served as a reminder of both his awkwardness and the fact you'd let a stranger into your home with only the promise of sex. 

You'd stepped forward, closing the gap between each of you with your palms first, laying them flat over his cheeks. In this light, you could see the true grey of his eyes, soft and harsh tones making up his vision. He looked at you through both nervousness and curiosity before your slow movement forward had connected your lips in his, a drawn out kiss to test the waters. 

His hands had immediately came to press over the small of your back, bringing you closer while displaying the largeness of his palms. His grasp had taken more space than than other men's had, while somehow much gentler, calmer. He'd been a good kisser too, locking of lips molding perfectly to your own, and when introducing a swipe of tongue, he'd responded with a slide over yours. He felt good, a divine play between each of you as he moved with you, a gentle push toward the bed before you'd laid on your back, his grasp over your hips and the bag landing beside. 

Yuuta pulled back first, hands sliding upward to lift your shirt and graze smooth skin beneath, scaling the length of stomach before pulling cotton over your head. You giggled, a warmth on your face as he dug through the bag beside you, retrieving the box needed before tossing the white plastic to one side. The oversized hoodie he'd been dressed within had soon been thrown to the floor beside your garment, and through languid movements and kisses, the remainder of garments had been discarded. 

"Do you have lube?" Yuuta's voice was low, mouth against neck as he'd asked. At first, your response had simply been a hum in appreciation to the vibrations against your skin, teeth over lip to suppress a louder sound, though when he'd drawn back entirely you'd been left to process the question. A quick glance toward your bedside table had been enough, Yuuta's vascular forearm reaching over to pull the top drawer, a small bottle with a pump pulled from the mess. 

The black box had been opened, a condom retrieved by long fingers, the foil resting between teeth as he tore it open. You'd giggled and he'd looked toward you in sheepishness, the small smile you'd seen throughout your limited time with him returning.  "Do you do that for all the girls?" Your question had caused his eyes to roll, his smile and laughter answer enough before an apology. But, you'd reassured him.  "Don't apologize, it was hot."

He pulled rubber downward, shaft covered in the thin layer before he'd pumped a few globs of the thick substance over two fingers, a draw over slit to make your back arch. Yuuta watched your expression soften when he'd inserted them, slow pumps and heavy breaths. When he'd added a third, you'd shifted and he'd paused, but your hand moving to envelop his wrist and pull it toward you had caused him to continue, the care in his actions making for an easier experience. 

When he'd finally pushed the head of himself inside your walls, he'd groaned, a relief to ache he'd felt within himself when using only his fingers. He pushed in further, your tightness hugging him while you'd moaned beneath, arms lowering to allow himself closer to you, chest to chest.  "This okay?" He'd whispered gently and you'd nodded, eyes half lidded watching as he moved again, hips plush to your spread thighs before he'd draw himself back. Lips agape, moans passed through involuntarily, the stretch of his cock buried deep within you and his skin brushing yours to share warmth intoxicating. Your legs had moved from the loose spread position to instead wrap themselves around his torso. 

Yuuta groaned softly, finally pressing his mouth to yours after watching your expression contort beneath him with each thrust. A whimper against his skin, he'd rocked himself closer to release, your walls fluttering over the length he'd endowed to milk his length into the latex cover. Part of you had wished you'd taken him bare, envisioning his release as you'd taken his load, though instead he'd groaned and stuttered to climax within bounds of protection. 

Yuta's forehead had pressed against your own, fingers clutching the pillow behind your head in one hand and your thigh in another, squeezing over both cotton cover and the thick of skin as he allowed himself to experience his euphoria. He'd pushed himself furthest into you while coming undone, your walls squeezing him as he fizzled back into the bedroom around him. 

When he'd finished, the latex taken to the small trash can within your bathroom. When you'd returned from a quick shower he'd been propped against the headboard of your bed, clothed and phone in hand. 

"You're still here?" You laughed, damp towel hung over the white bedroom door as you'd made your way back into your room. His sight had lifted from his phone as he'd stood, smile over face.  "I was thinking we could go and get dinner?" The request had caught you off guard, heart skipping a beat when your eyes had scanned his. He'd have to let Toge know he wouldn't be meeting his friend, after-all. 

#yuta okkotsu x reader #yuta okkotsu smut #jjk smut #jjk x reader #jjk x reader smut #yuta x reader smut #yuta x reader #yuta okkotsu x reader smut #jjk yuta smut #jjk yuta x reader #jjk yuta thirst #jjk yuta fic #yuuta okkotsu x reader #yuuta okkotsu x reader smut #yuuta okkotsu smut #jujutsu kaisen smut #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jujutsu kaisen x reader smut #jujutsu kaisen fics

[kichiyosh1]

Me or my mother?

scaramouche/kunikuzushi x reader

slight angst/comfort

w//: if you squint (or even if you don't) I would say this counts as a yandere kuni aswell! just cuz he is really jelly and possesive of you in this one

Let's say Ei did keep the puppet and had given him a new purpose to live freely, but due to her busy schedule, she has you keep him company. Soon, Kunikuzushi begins to realize how frequent you are to leave him for when his mother calls for you, and from there his anxiety grows. Is it jealousy or insecurity? heck if I know!

Kunikuzushi was free to stay in his mother's estate, same as he was also allowed to visit the streets of Inazuma if he ever so wishes, but that currently isn't his main objective of the day.

"Kunikuzushi!" Ah, what great timing you have.

Right from the moment he opened his eyes after what felt like a long dream, all he was able to recall from the scene was that you had stepped forward bowing your head.

"I would be honored to serve you both, my Archon."

"Excellent, then you shall be entrusted with this task."

It had only been a few weeks since then, but the puppet had already grown very attached to you, to the point you can see the visible frown on his adorable face whenever there were other duties you had to attend to. The longing looks and the hesitant grip he'd have on your sleeve along with how meek and tiny his voice would get, it really was an effective way to keep you rooted into place, and the fact that he did all this unbeknownst to even him? It really showed how innocent of a person he was. Just wants your attention is all.

"y/n! good morning, how nice of you to drop by," yeah, like he wasn't already anticipating your arrival. "Good morning to you as well, oh, I came here to drop off a few things." In your hands was a tray of food, and despite his unecessary need for it, he was insistent on trying your cooking, even willing to choke on some sweets and desserts if it meant he'd be eating food that you made just for him. "Mhm smells good, say, why don't we share the meal, I think you deserve to eat a portion of your own cooking too, right?" Giddily taking hold of the tray, ready to lead you to his place in the estate when he sees you're not following him.

"Is something the matter?"

"Nothing that should concern you too much, the Electro Archon has called me in for the day to discuss matters concerning—" His mother called for you? "Oh, unfortunately I didn't have time to prepare your food since I was busy arranging my materials, so I had one of the maids make it for you. Please go on without me, it won't take long I promise." You were already facing the opposite direction before you could finish your sentence. "Eat well kunikuzushi!" you turned your head with a wave, while all he could do was stand there, his eyes switching between the tray in his hands and your disappearing figure.

He was confused by two things, one: how could you leave him there so quickly? and two: so this ISN'T your cooking?

"Why would I eat something prepared by a stranger? blegh." He set the tray down and stuck his tongue out in a childishly manner, displeasure written all over his face and gesture with his hands curled to his chest, like he was scared the food would jump out at him or something.

"I-I wasn't hungry anyways, I'll just wait until you get back." he says to himself nodding his head, since there was no y/n in the vicinity for him to say that to. What a silly little man.

He's come to the realization that your meetings with the shogun have become more frequent, more than he would like

It was cutting off his quality time with you

Sure that's his mom you're meeting with and you basically work for her but you were also assigned to him weren't you? Which means you should be here by his side right now attending to HIS needs, not hers >:(

Why did she have to pick you of all people anyway? there are plenty others in the estate that are at her beck and call, so why did it have to be his dear y/n :(

You said it was nothing to worry about, oh but it was worrying HIM very, very much

He's tried different methods so you wouldn't have to attend those stupid meetings, latching on to you and blocking your path, the most desperate one of his attempts was probably locking you up in his room, it didn't last long though since you threatened him you'd ask for a transfer if he continued acting like this (which you meant playfully but it almost gave kuni a heart attack)

It was like watching a puppy stand by it's door waiting for it's master to come home

and everytime you would return, you would always have something to say about ei. "she was in a good mood today"," she thaught me techniques in order to do my work more efficiently." the meeting was already over so why were you still mentioning her?

With how much time you had gone from him, he was starting to think you enjoyed his mother's company more, was that it?

Was his childish personality to immature for you? do you prefer if he had that same strict and authoritive demeanor his mother had? Were you really going through with that threat of yours? wanting to transfer?

Do you really like her more than him?

Now he just HAD to be in one of those meetings, it was a must he got to the bottom of this before he goes absolutely crazy, and to his suprise you agreed to bring him to your next one

So there he was, sat a little way from you.

Oh, so was it usuall just you and his mother alone during these? which means all your attention would be on her right?

oh hell nah, she's trying to steal you away from him wasn't she?!

Kunikuzushi was quick to shoo you out of there once his mother dismissed you

cue sad ei noises because her son didn't eat any of the deserts she prepared

When you asked him why he was so quick to leave you were thrown with the most sudden question

"...what was that?"

"Me or my mother? It shouldn't be hard for you to decide right?" He was obviously the only right answer, so why was it taking awhile for you to reply?

"Are you really contemplating this...?" He had repeated this question many times in his head, and he swore everytime that he wasn't going to cry, but now that it was out there in the open he could feel liquid pulling in his eyes. Were these what you humans called tears? a product of ones sadness and frustration?

"What reason would I have to choose between-"

"You've been 'hanging' out with her more recently! we used to spend all day together but we barely have time for that anymore because you're always quick to leave me when it concerns her. Is it because you've already grown tired of me? you like her more than me..?"

The amount of hurt written on his face and heard in his trembling voice had you grimacing at your actions. You never intended for him to feel this way, you had no idea he was hurting on the inside because of your ignorance. So you took a step, slowly to not startle him as if he were some corner creature, handling it with the utmost care you've always had, reserved only for him.

"My sweet, darling kunikuzushi." You start, craddling his face so that he'd meet your eyes, letting him know he had your full attention.

"I apologize for my actions. I had failed to see the pain you felt and made you feel neglected, but know that I would never choose anything or anyone over you, no matter what or who they might be."

His tears have fallen, but not even a sniffle was let out, as he made sure he was able to hear your voice, the voice he had missed speaking to him, loud and clear.

"The reason for this is because her personal attendant hasn't been present as of late due to a sickness they caught. Your mother thought i'd be good to fill in for the meantime, and this way I would also be able to report to her regarding your wellbeing."

That was the genuine truth, and he believes you, and as you continued speaking he slowly let his arms engulf you, a sigh of relief escaping him as you continued giving him words of reassurance.

He was content with your answer, but before he could be truly satisfied he needed to hear you say it.

"You still didn't answer my question."

"Which one?"

"Me or my mother? This time I'm only giving you three seconds to-"

"You, kuni. I'll always choose you, but do keep in mind I still work for her."

You let out a chuckle as kunikuzushi let out a pout, puffing his cheeks and crossing his arms, back to his usual self you see.

"Hmph, I should still be your top priority, always, the same as you are mine."

"Alright, alright, you really can be childish sometimes, but that's one of the things I love about you."

and with that, kunikuzushi could finally sleep peacefully, knowing his chances of having you to himself are high up there, so goodluck getting to your next meeting.

(I DIDN'T PROOF READ BUT I DON'T THINK IT'S THAT BAD)

#genshin impact x reader #scaramouche #scaramouche x reader #kunikuzushi #kunikuzushi x reader #wanderer #wanderer x reader #kabukimono #kabukimono x reader #scaramouche x you #scaramouche x y/n #yandere scaramouche x reader #yandere scaramouche

[vnusoki]

⋆⑅˚₊ THE ALIEN STAGE . . .

⊹ ࣪ ˖ synopsis. sing or die. the alien stage determines your fate, but what if you lover was your opponent ?

⊹ ࣪ ˖ warnings. satoru gojo x reader. hint of suguru geto x reader. death. angst. hurt/no comfort. fluff. consists of flashbacks and recalling memories while singing. kissing. making out, and illusions to intercourse. based on the world of alien stage. death ( obviously 👩🏽‍🍳 ) not proofread

⊹ ࣪ ˖ notes. wc. 1.1k this is based off of alien stage. i remember seeing a vid back in 2022 and i forgot about it. seems fate that it’s my new obsession currently. sorry if I get stuff wrong <3 might make a suguru version.. idk..

The light is blinding you, you think, as you bring a hand to block its ray’s shining from the stage lights above. The platform you stand on is slowly raising and you can finally see your stage for the first time in what seem like a few hours.

You are not glad. Anxiety is a knot in your stomach that with the seconds passing by, only tightens further. You have done this before, you tell yourself. There is no reason to be afraid but the bead of sweat tricking down your forehead is testament to the lie.

The fear of death clouds over every round you play, every song you sing, and every person you were set to face against.

Last round, you faced against Suguru Geto. His black hair and mesmerising eyes had captivated the audience the moment you emerged on stage. But you’d been better. Your singing skills soon took the crowd by storm and it was only a matter of time before you won.

You were thankful. Or that was what you would’ve liked to say as you gazed at the dead body of your friend. His eyes ever still mesmerising but the light had long left them. Or maybe it’s always been like that, you just never noticed.

This time, you face against Satoru. Your white haired, blue eyed friend. He had always garnered the attention of his crowds. It was like fate for him to always win with his attractive looks. Nonetheless the fact that his skills were great.

He sounded angelically, his voice hitting high notes and dipping for lows in just the right places. It was as if he had trained his whole life for this.

Your platform finally stills as you stand on your floating platform. The microphone stand infront of you is white, as is the floor you stand on but your dress?

It is wine red and hooks to your figure, the eyeliner anointed on your face is also red and the lipstick too.

You look to your side as the sea of spectators lights up. Satoru stands, back pin straight, blue eyes dark and looking forward. You wish he would look at you.

He wears a suit of white and you are puzzled. Whys would they make you wear a red dress but not hsv w you match with your partner. You laugh at the thought. It wouldn’t matter since you’d be dead in a few minutes.

The music starts in the background and you open your mouth, lips quivering for the first time ever. Nothing comes out and it seems your throat has closed up from horror.

You can hear Satoru’s voice all around you and this time when you look at him, he is turned towards you, blue eyes glistening in the light and he is as beautiful as ever.

You remember when you first met him. You were both young when you attended anakt garden but you would always remember the defiant look on his face as you all stood in a row presenting your voices.

He had been stubborn then, but it soon slowly withered away like a rotting apple from the harsh slaps and beatings he would get for it.

You’d thought, even with the bruise on his cheek, that he looked as pretty as ever. And even more so now as you can see the light purple bruise on his cheek again.

He looks at you, lips moving to a beat you neither recognise nor care for. He is mouthing words you do not understand, a language you have forgotten and you only see him.

Your feet are moving before you know it and you are once again reminded of your first real talk. Satoru was laying on a bed of grass, the newest injury of his, on display on his cheek for all to see. Light drops of blood litter the top of his white shirt.

You think he looks cute pouting.

You take a seat next to him. Eyes trained on the blue sky that you all know is too fake to be real.

‘‘…you mess around too much, y’know?’’

Your hand is lightly grazing his swollen cheek. You watch as a blush seeps into his skin and runs towards the tips of his ears.

‘‘yeah, yeah I do…’’

He wouldn’t ever tell you that he does it to make himself look more better in your eyes. To gain your attention and approval. Shoko has already teased him enough about his crush.

You now stand infront of Satoru and time stills for a few moments. The light is making his face shine, the beads of sweat glisten as they run down the length of his gorgeous face.

You still haven’t sung and sorry claws at him. He doesn’t want you too die, he can’t live with you dead.

‘‘why aren’t you singing? Sing!’’

He pleads with you but you can practically feel the timer slowly coming to a close, the last few seconds ticking down.

‘‘…you know I won’t.’'

Of course you won’t. You swore it to him only a day or so ago and he’d begged you not to as you lay together. You trace shapes on the length of his bare chest, watching as it rises and falls.

You try to distract yourself on what you have just done but the repetitive twitch in your legs and the liquid you can feel running down your inner thigh is evidence enough of what you have just done.

Satoru kisses you again, this time slow and passionately and he lingers too long for the taste of his sadness and fear not to be tasted by you on his tongue.

‘‘…promise me you’ll sing.’’

You don’t reply, instead running your hand through the back of his hair, you bring his face once again closer to yours, bare chests touching. His hands are roaming everywhere, from the expanse of your thighs to sweeter and more intimate areas.

Satoru opens his eyes but the memory has ended too soon. The music has stopped and your feverish look, the pure bliss and love in your eyes is gone.

You stand for a few moments, swaying on your feet and he hears your final words fall off your red lips.

‘‘…you know I can’t promise you that…’’

You fall to the ground, red dress pooling around you like blood. A thin trail escapes your mouth and falls down your chin.

He looks down to his attire and now Satoru knows why they put him in a white suit instead of a red one. He sees the blood splattered from you on his blazer and he thinks he’s going to vomit.

But vomiting won’t bring you back and he watches as guards he didn’t know were there, come and drag you away. He watches the red, bloody trial you leave behind and he wishes he wore red.

© VNUSOKI 24 do not copy, repost or plagiarise my work !

#jujutsu kaisen x reader #jujutsu kaisen angst #jjk x reader #jjk angst #gojo satoru x reader #satoru gojo x reader #jujutsu kaisen #gojo x reader #gojo satoru x you #jjk x you #gojo satoru angst #gojo satoru #gojo satoru fluff #gojou satoru x reader #satoru gojo fluff #jjk gojo #jujutsu gojo #gojo smut #gojo satoru smut #jujutsu kaisen smut #suguru geto x reader #satoru gojo #alien stage #alien stage au #alien stage round 1

[aphroditelovesu]

The Lost Queen - XII

— summary: You woke up near a military camp without remembering how and why you got there, you didn’t understand why they were dressed like ancient Greeks, all you knew was that you weren’t safe and you needed to get out of that place as soon as possible. Too bad for you that you found yourself attracting unwanted attention from the Macedonian King and he won’t let you go so easily.

— genre: yandere, dark!au.

— warnings: time travel, obsessive and possessive behavior, murder, mention of torture, kidnapping, angst, fluffy (very rarely), dub-con, possibly smut.

— pairing: yandere!alexander the great x female!reader, yandere!generals x female!reader.

— word count: 3,070.

— tag list: @devils-blackrose, @faerykingdom, @hadesnewpersephone, @mariaelizabeth21-blog1 , @kadu-5607, @zoleea-exultant, @borntoexplore11-blog, @silmawensgarden.

— the lost queen series masterlist.

Chapter 12

When you regained consciousness, you were no longer in the Macedonian war camp.

You knew this because your body was lying on something soft and comfortable, softer than your cot and far more comfortable than anything you had experienced during your time here.

Your eyes looked around, looking at everything with fear and curiosity. You quickly realized you were in some kind of tent and a luxurious one at that. There were exquisite tapestries and gold, lots of gold. It was a richness that you could only imagine, seen only in old period films and something you never thought you would ever witness.

It was beautiful. And disturbing. Absolutely disturbing.

You were no longer with the Macedonians, you knew just by looking at the wealth that tent had. Not even Alexander's tent had so much wealth, he preferred to maintain a more Spartan style, a way of getting closer to his soldiers and generals. You respected him for that.

You had no idea where you were and who you were with. Genuine dread and fear filled your insides and you had to try to hold back the rising bile, the imminent urge to vomit that took over your aching body.

Now was not the time to vomit. You needed to find out where you were, what had happened and how to get out of there.

You carefully got up from the small bed you were half-sitting and half-lying on and began trying to walk through what appeared to be the opening of the tent. You stopped abruptly when the flap opened and you had to stay strong when the person you least expected appeared in front of you.

"Perdiccas." You whispered his name, your legs shaking weakly and your heart beating wildly. You were about to have an anxiety attack and needed to try to stay alert.

Perdiccas looked at you, concern shining in his dark blue eyes. He stepped forward and gently held your shoulders.

"Are you well?" He murmured, looking at your face, searching for any sign of a bruise. You shook your head in denial, trying to understand what the hell was going on.

You were no longer in the Macedonian camp, that much was obvious, so why was Perdiccas here too?

"W-Where are we?" Your voice cracked a little.

Perdiccas shook his head, "You will find out soon enough. You must rest now."

"What do you mean by that? I..." You felt yourself being pulled more and more by the panic that was growing inside you. No, you didn't want to go through all that shit again.

"Everything will be fine." Perdiccas assured, "They swore to me that you would not be harmed."

They? Who were they?

"Who are you talking about? Perdiccas, what's going on? Who are they?" Your mind seemed to spin with every question you asked.

Perdiccas pursed his lips and sighed heavily and after a moment's deliberation, he replied, "The Persians."

"The Persians." You repeated his words, trying to make sure you heard him right. The Persians, yes. You were with the Persians. You and Perdiccas.

Perdiccas just nodded, unsure of what to say. He had thought during the hours when you were blank on what exactly to say to you, but everything he had rehearsed had gone to waste.

"Why are we with the Persians?"

Perdiccas bit his lower lip as he contemplated your words. He didn't seem to want to tell you but you were going to find out one way or another.

"Because I brought us here." That's all he said.

You nodded your aching head, trying to stay calm. Perdiccas brought you here.

"Why?"

"Because then we can be together." He murmured, looking at your face calmly.

As his words registered in your mind, you replied weakly, "You betrayed Alexander." It wasn't a question, but a statement.

"Yes," Perdiccas began to walk in a circle, "I did it for you. For us."

You looked at him, your eyes flashing with anger, "Do you realize what you did? Alexander is going to kill you!"

"I did what I had to do. Darius offered me a good deal and I couldn't say no."

"W-What did he offer you?" The words were louder than a whisper, but he heard them well.

Perdiccas approached you and placed his hands on your bare shoulders, "That you would be mine in exchange for information about Alexander."

Your heart began to beat painfully inside your chest and a wave of nausea took over your body. You pushed Perdiccas away and unable to hold back the bile, you vomited on the floor of the tent and some on Perdiccas' boots.

Perdiccas just looked at you with cold, hard eyes. He didn't seem disgusted but rather irritated.

"So it is true."

You looked at him confused, your breathing labored and the bad taste of vomit on your lips. How you wish you had a toothbrush now.

"You are pregnant." He said, clenching his fists.

You didn't respond, you just closed your eyes, trying to hold back another wave of nausea.

"It's all good." Perdiccas said, placing a hand on your head, "Soon you will be free of this burden."

You opened your eyes quickly, scared of what those words could mean.

"Don't worry, I'll take care of you. Now come, let's get you cleaned up and you'll be introduced to Darius."

When Perdiccas helped you straighten up, you didn't fight it. Fear paralyzed you. Perdiccas seemed very calm about the news of your pregnancy and something told you that what he was planning would not be good. But you wouldn't let him hurt your baby.

You would kill him before that.

A few days after your wedding night, at the Macedonian War Camp.

Perdiccas was in his tent, with a cup of wine in his hands and the other gripping his sword tightly. He was livid. The wedding was over but the sounds of the festivities still echoed through the camp for days. The soldiers all seemed excited about their choice of Queen.

Although you were clearly a foreigner and an unknown, you had earned their respect during your time there. You helped the injured, helped save Cleitus, and worked with the doctors to heal them. You were a kind of hero to the soldiers and they adored and respected you.

Perdiccas liked knowing that you wouldn't have any problems with them, but he hated the fact that you married a man other than him. He felt sick just thinking about your wedding night, about Alexander taking your virginity, about him entering you and hearing the sweets sounds your lips would produce. And in the nights that followed, he pretended not to notice that Alexander seemed to spend most of his nights in your tent.

Perdiccas wanted to gut Alexander for this.

Gripping the cup of wine tighter, Perdiccas' knuckles turned white. The more he thought about it the angrier he became. He needed to control himself or he would end up walking into Alexander's tent and doing something he would regret.

Well, maybe he wouldn't regret it so much, but he didn't want to die now. Not when he had you to conquer.

Sighing heavily, he stood up from his chair and put away his sword. He wanted to sleep, he didn't want to think about you in Alexander's arms.

But the gods had other plans for him. Perdiccas frowned when a messenger entered his tent without asking permission. He didn't recognize him as one of his men. Maybe it was a message from you? He was excited by the prospect.

"General Perdiccas?" The messenger asked in broken greek. Perdiccas heard a strong accent and he didn't like it at all.

He quickly reached for his sword and in one swift movement, Perdiccas cornered the man.

"Who are you?" He growled, his sword pressing into the man's throat.

The messenger gasped, "I-I bring a message from King Darius." His words were harsh and scared, but Perdiccas understood them perfectly.

Darius. The fucking King of Persia.

Darius send him a letter. Why?

"Why?" He asked, still not removing the sword from the man's throat.

"A proposal." The messenger murmured and pointed to the sword, "Can you take it out? I just want to talk."

Perdiccas stared at him with a raised eyebrow but nodded and slowly removed the sword from the messenger's throat. The man stood up and introduced himself.

"I am Aslan."

"I don't care who you are. Just tell me why you're here and why I shouldn't report you to Alexander."

Aslan muttered something in persian and said, "Darius has a proposal for you.

"Which proposal?"

"One that might be of interest to you. One that involves your new Queen—" Aslan couldn't even finish the sentence before Perdiccas had him cornered again.

"What about her? Is she in danger?! ANSWER ME!" Perdiccas growled furiously in the messenger's face. Aslan swallowed.

"She's not in danger!" Aslan managed to choke out, "She'll be fine. I just came to talk."

Perdiccas narrowed his eyes and slowly walked away, "Say it at once."

Aslan straightened his robes and said, "Here is a letter from Darius." He handed him a papyrus envelope.

Perdiccas took it suspiciously and said, "I can't read persian."

One corner of Aslan's mouth turned up, "It's written in greek."

Perdiccas sighed and opened the letter, reading its contents.

''General Perdiccas,

I address you in this correspondence to propose an agreement that I believe could be of great interest to both of us. I have been aware of your feelings towards your new Queen, as well as the supposed tension towards your King since he married her.

I therefore present my proposal: if you are willing to share information that could contribute to the success of our endeavors in this war, I undertake to assist you in fulfilling your wishes in relation to the Queen. She will be entirely at your disposal, whether to join you in marriage or to be taken as a concubine, as you wish. I assure you that all measures will be taken to guarantee your well-being and safety.

If you agree to the proposed conditions, I will take the necessary steps to transfer you from your camp to mine. I await your response.

Yours sincerely,

King Darius III.''

Perddicas's eyes widened as he read the bold content of this letter. When he finished, he took it to a candle and set it on fire. Destroying any possible evidence.

Aslan watched him with interest.

Perdiccas turned to the persian messenger, his eyes shining with determination and mischief, ''Tell your King that I accept his proposal.'' There was no hesitation and not an ounce of remorse. He had made his choice.

Aslan smiled mischievously and nodded.

Perdiccas stared at the candle with a dark expression. You would be his. It was everything he needed. He knew he would be turning a traitor, but he didn't care. The prospect of living a life with you was more than he could have wanted.

Maybe he would be cursed by the gods for this choice but it would all be worth it if he could hold you for a moment, feel the taste of your lips again, touch your body, join you as one.

It would all be worth it for you.

A few days before your kidnapping,

You walked around your tent bored and distressed. It had been a few days, weeks in fact, that you had been feeling increasingly anxious and this was due to several reasons. One of the main ones was that you noticed a significant change in the story.

You were supposed to go to Sogdian Rock, where Alexander would meet Roxanne and marry her, but instead, he was preparing for a battle against Darius that you knew was Issus's. This was wrong, very wrong indeed. You had already changed history too much and you feared what those changes might mean for the future.

You needed to leave soon before you screwed everything up once and for all.

You took a deep breath and thought about your other problem. Your period was late. Okay, you didn't keep track of your menstrual cycle here, but you knew it should have come to you by now. You thought maybe this was due to the fact that you were no longer a virgin and that this could have changed your cycle, but that didn't make any sense.

The truth was what you feared. A few days ago, you started to feel strangely sick and had some nausea.

You assumed it was the food that was bad, but when those symptoms only increased, you knew the truth.

You were pregnant.

This was bad, very bad. You shouldn't be pregnant. You could not. Alexander should have taken years to have a child with Roxanne, not you. The idea of pregnancy was scary for you, what it could mean. This could keep you permanently stuck in the past but could also be catastrophic for the future.

You needed to find a way out. But you had no idea how to get back. Your only clue was that strange man in the market but you never saw him again, which left you with no way out.

''(Y/N)? Can I come in?'' You were startled when you heard a voice outside your tent. You took a deep breath and replied,

''Yes. Come in.''

The flap lifted and you smiled gently when you saw Leonnatus enter, dressed in a simple white chiton. He smiled widely and ran to hug you, pulling you tightly and crushing you in a bear hug.

You laughed softly and hugged him back. A few days ago, you found yourself very close to this officer, he seemed to like you and you liked him. He reminded you a little of Perdiccas, due to how kind he was to you.

''How are you?'' He asked when you separated.

''I'm fine.'' You mumbled and he raised his eyebrow.

''Tell me what's wrong.'' His voice was slightly harsh and you looked at him, ''Please.'' He added when he saw your incredulous expression.

''I...'' You sighed and sat down in a chair, ''If I tell you something, will you promise not to tell anyone?''

As soon as you uttered these words, the tent flap was opened again and Seleucus entered unannounced. You frowned and he gave you a guilty smile.

''Sorry. I couldn't help but hear you talking and I want to know too!'' Seleucus said, approaching you.

Leonnatus raised his eyebrow, ''You are a gossiper.''

You laughed when Seleucus looked at you indignantly. Oh, these two were comedy and you loved them for it. You were happy to have found an unlikely friendship in them.

''I am merely concerned for the well-being of our wonderful Queen.'' Seleucus defended himself.

''I'm sure you are.'' Leonnatus scoffed.

''Okay, okay! I'll say it but you two have to promise, no, swear to me that you won't say anything to anyone, you hear?'' You said nervously. Noticing your nervousness, both men nodded quickly.

''I…'' You took a deep breath, gathering courage, ''Well, I think I'm pregnant.''

Leonnatus smiled widely and Seleucus even jumped for joy.

''Ah, by the gods! That's great!'' Leonnatus said, very excited.

''YES! You have to tell Alexander! He's going to be so happy!'' Seleucus added, joining his fellow officer in his joy.

You quickly stood up, ''NO! You swore to me not to say anything!

They stopped celebrating and looked at you confused. That was good news, wasn't it?

Leonnatus approached carefully and placed his hand on your shoulder, ''Why?''

''Because I don't want him to know yet. I'm not sure if I'm pregnant or not, but I want to know for sure first.'' It was a half-truth and thankfully they seemed satisfied with it.

''Alright, let's not say anything.'' Seleucus said and placed a hand on your other shoulder, ''You have our word.''

You smiled in relief, ''Thank you.''

Leonnatus and Seleucus hugged you in a group, making you squeeze between them. You didn't push them away, instead feeling calm about having friends and allies who clearly cared about you. That was good and it hurt a part of you to know that you would have to leave them eventually.

But for now... You would just make the most of this time as much as you can.

Present day, at the Persian War Camp,

True to Perdiccas' words, you were washed and dressed by servants. You looked like a doll in the hands of these women and you hated this feeling of helplessness.

When they finally finished dressing you, you found yourself sitting in a chair, waiting to be called to meet Darius. A part of you was apprehensive, while another felt a twinge of excitement at being about to meet another historical figure.

Sighing, you grabbed a glass of water, drinking it slowly as you reflected on the gravity of the situation you found yourself in. It was clear that big problems lay ahead.

You stood up abruptly as the tent flap was pulled aside, your heart beating wildly as your eyes locked on the figure entering. The glass of water slipped from your shaking hand, falling to the floor with a muffled pop, the liquid spilling onto the carpet.

A chill ran down your spine as you recognized who stood before you. You instinctively stepped back, your hesitant footsteps echoing softly in the tense silence of the tent as the figure approached.

"It's... you...", Your words came out in a fragile, almost inaudible murmur, your body seeming to weaken in the face of the imposing presence in front of you.

It was him, the man from the market. The same person who, in some inexplicable way, had been the catalyst for your journey through time. Disbelief and fear intertwined in your mind as you tried to process the significance of this unexpected encounter.

''Hello, (Y/N). It's good to see you.'' The man said, smiling broadly, ''We have a lot to talk about, don't we?''

— lady l: It took me a while to bring it but my days are busy and I barely had time to write! BUT, I hope the wait was worth it with this ending... Hahaha, what do you think will happen? 👀

I hope you enjoyed it and we'll see you in the next chapter, which won't take so long! Love you!! ❤️❤️

#the lost queen #tlq #history #yandere historical characters #yandere history #alexander the great x reader #yandere alexander the great #yandere alexander the great x reader #long fic #fanfic #yandere au

[svmjaeyvn]

love maze, s.jy.

chapter one pairing: jake x afab!reader word count: tbd (series)

masterlist

add yourself to the taglist here!

genre: college!au, mutual friends, fake dating, smut.

synopsis: an unfortunate encounter, drunken mistakes, and a sort of (definitely) stalker leads jake sim ‘dating’ his best friend’s childhood crush.

or, your life gets intertwined with a rich boy’s in attempt to not get sued by his crazy personal fangirl and like with all good cliches, sex overcomplicates things.

contents: smut, sort of strangers to fuck buddies to lovers pipeline, childhood best friend!jay, mentions of best friend! yunjin, curly haired & mixed reader, uni!au, rich nepo baby!jake, enha frat boys, lots of kissing, fake dating turning into fwb real quick, totally way too into it for it to be fake early on, big booty reader that’s jake’s obsessed with, partying and alcohol use, slight violence, he fell first and harder trope, stem bf & writer gf, (kinda overly) possessive jake, some angst to spice things up, daddy issues, hyper independent reader who struggles with her feelings, fluff and happy ending!!

a/n: hello~ i’ve never been a tumblr girly but i have went through my w*ttpad era back in 2018 so bare with me y’all. this will be a series but not that long (i hope) so pls look forward to it. warning tags will be placed before each “chapter” to specify what to expect. pls pls reblog and interact, i’d love to have feedback and see what your thoughts are. okay! yay, for now enjoy and thank you sm :D

MDNI, 18+

tap below to continue

CHAPTER ONE: PINEAPPLE

masterlist next

word count: 2.5k

warnings: alcohol, partying, creeper in a store, bestie jay, already stepping up to be a fake bf jake duhhh

a/n: short and sweet intro

"HEY SORRY, JAY's busy—”

"Hey baby!" You smile brightly, attempting to seem causal but emphasizing the conversation rather loudly. Wandering through the isles aimlessly, stopping to pretend to browse the selection of cereals while peeking through the corner of your eye, you keep watch on the unfamiliar man that seemed to be following you.

You've been at the store for 15 minutes, around 10 of those ago you noticed the same man over and over, passing by each other with first polite smiles which morphed into a sort of anxiety feeling on your end noting how he began to linger around more obviously, far enough away to not seem suspicious to those around but definitely setting off an alarm in your head to stay alert.

It was a Friday night, after finishing up with your last minute shift due to a coworker calling out, you decided it was time to finally grocery shop, something that you've been putting off all week due to laziness but now you wished you opted to eat eggs for the third day in a row rather than be here. Typically, you and Yunjin went to the store together, but with her out on a date, that left you alone for the night.

"We're still cooking for dinner right? I'm at the store right now picking stuff up," You continue after meeting confused silence on the other end. Due to the increasing gut feeling and you desperate for someone to come to your aid in at least knowing where you were if you did end up missing and on the news, you called the only person you knew in the area that would come. Jay Park, an extended family friend that you practically grew up attached to each others hips, had followed you along to the same Uni two years ago. With a three hour car ride being the distance to your home town, you and Jay depended on each other as a sort of familiarity and unspoken acknowledgment that there was support for one another.

University created a sort of distance in your relationship, both studying different majors and finding your own friend groups outside of one another but you still talked every other day through text and hung out occasionally. Jay, being a well know frat boy around campus, became a sort of gossip topic of him and his other frat members. His admittedly attractive looks that he grew into helping with his popularity along with his love for the party scene.

You on the other hand, were a home body more than anything. After your first year, you had moved into an apartment about 5 minutes away off-campus with your previous dorm-mate and newly founded best friend. You and Yunjin became close relatively fast and being able to get through freshmen year living together in the tiny space meant you'd work perfectly well moving in a place where you both got your own rooms and a private bathroom.

Thus, your routine consisted of lectures, homework, your part-time job, and sleep. It was quiet and comfortable. Not that you were opposed to a night out and getting drunk off your ass every once in a while but being a party girl didn't seem like your cup of tea to do every weekend.

"Sorry, ___ it's Jake. I don't know where Jay is, he just left his phone with me earlier," Jake speaks into the phone, making his way out of the booming house to better hear her. The muffled music and loud voices heard from his end causing a slight panic to rise in your stomach but also nearly face palm. It's a Friday night, of course he was partying.

You rake your brain to put a face to the name. You've met Jay's frat friends on occasion, though they mostly consisted of when you were all drunk so it was sort of a blur.

"Yeah I'm at Target," You nod, specifying your location and hoping that whoever Jake was, he was sober enough to comprehend that something was wrong and that he'd remember your words. "Do you want anything else specifically?" From the corner of your eye, you can see the man beginning to pace, seemingly growing antsy with waiting on you to move. Deciding it was best to make your way toward the front where more workers would be, you completely disregard your near empty cart and pushed it along while holding your phone to your ear.

"... Are you okay?" Jake inquires, his brows burrowed together in confusion but feeling the underlying feeling of the call. The only reason he answered was because he knew you and Jay were close, having met less than a handful of times but the contact picture Jay saved you under allowed him to remember who you were. The three spammed messages you sent prior to your call being unable to be read due to his phone being locked. He intended to only inform you of the reason the said boy wouldn't respond for a while but it ended up to this rather weird conversation.

"Uh... no I don't think so," You answer, acting as if you were responding to a question. Jake straightens up slightly, unaware if that was an actual answer or if you were still on the one sided random talk through the phone. He sort of hoped it was the second option for your sake. "Okay I'll look. I'm sure they have pineapple,"

Jay was an overprotective guy, especially when it came to those he cared about. Early on, whenever they'd go out, he told everyone that their emergency code word was pineapple. Jake, along with the other boys, found it utterly ridiculous and never once had to actually use it but he did remember the word loud and clear even months later. The conversation was far too random and specific for you to just casually be saying that, and thus Jake assumed the safe word was something Jay used universally.

"You're at the store in town right?" He asks, now heading back into the house, weaving his way through the bodies in search of his friends.

"Yeah," You nod disregarding that he couldn't see it. There was two Targets in the area you lived it, though one was undeniably farther away from the University. In town referred to the one you stood in, absentmindedly staring at the electronics assuming there had to be more cameras in this area. "Okay, well, I'll be home soon then,"

"Give me ten minutes," Jake said into the phone before handing up the call, not giving you time to respond. Scrunching up your nose, you felt significantly smaller without the comfort of another voice on the other line. From the opposite isle, you could see the man lingering around the corner, now staring directly at you but quickly looking away upon making eye contact.

With a slight pit in your stomach, you take a second to breathe. Attempting to seem inconspicuous, you glance over your items and visibly pale. The only things consisted of body wash, a bag of lemons, and ice cream bars that were now melting. You had circled the food department a near three times and hadn't picked up much even though you made it rather clear on the call you were meant to be getting dinner. Silently praying that the man wasn't keen enough to pay that much attention, you shake off the shiver that ran down your spine.

Meanwhile, Jake ran through the house collecting his friends one by one. Luckily, with it being only 7:30 and rather early in the night, no one was near hammered yet, barely started on a buzz when he interrupted. Not much was shared in the process, the urgent way Jake pulled them along was enough for them to follow but Heeseung finally questioned it once they were packed in the car driving away from their own party.

"Where we going man?" The eldest asked, running a hand through his hair lazily.

Jake, being the only one with less than half a bottle of beer in, was in the driver seat. He drove fast, weaving through the lanes occasionally but still safe enough to not seem suspicious.

He glanced back at Jay through the rearview mirror, said boy tilting his head back in confusion. "___ called you, she's having an issue. Said something about pineapple and wasn't having an actual conversation with me so I'm assuming someone was following her,"

Jay straightened up, leaning closer from his seat while the other two spared glances. "When?"

"Right before I went to find you, told her to give me 10 minutes," Jake answers, partially relieved that Jay seemed concerned by the matter meaning he interpreted the call correctly but that only meant you were actually in trouble. "It's been 6,"

"Drive faster," Was all the other boy said, the few shots of liquor seemingly gone as he sobered up almost instantly. Though, the panic and overwhelming anger that brewed in the back of his head indicated that he was being influenced by the intoxication. Not that it would be a problem, especially if you were in danger of some sort.

Heeseung and Sunghoon sat quietly as Jake drove, connecting the dots for themselves due to the conversation. A minute later, the four were barreling out of the car and into the building. The bright lights contrasted against the dark outside, the boys looking around for sight of the girl.

"Give me my phone," Jay tells Jake, holding out his hand expectantly while he pulls it out of his back pocket. Tapping through the screen for a moment, Jay hold up the device to his ear waiting for you to answer but it goes to voicemail.

"She was talking about food so maybe she was over there?" Jake offers, leading the way toward the back of the store which held all the groceries.

Jay tries once more, holding the phone up as it dials. This time, there's the faint chime of an incoming call that was further away. Sunghoon nodded in the direction it came from, heading toward the area which consisted of books, music, and other miscellaneous things.

"No, thank you, I'm alright," Your voice was recognized first by Jay. Speeding up his steps, he rounds the corner to see you backed away toward the far end of the isle, the cart in between you and an unfamiliar man who had his back toward the four. Your eyes widened seeing the familiar face, slightly relieved but still in a sense of panic considering the man that was following you grew the courage a minute ago to actually say something now, keeping you tucked away in the corner as he did.

Attempting to step away, you shift to the right but the man matched your movement, staying directly in your path and blocking it. Moving to your left, he matched that as well causing you to purse your lips. He smiled, seeming as if it were amusing to see you becoming undone with his actions which sent a chill up your spine. Aside from his creepy stalking, he seemed and looked like a regular guy, which made it even worse because of how normal he seemed upon first glance.

"Teenie," Jay spoke up, making his and the rest of their presence known, using a nickname rather than your actual one. The guy turned at the sound, his face morphing from the smile into one of annoyance, a  clear grimace on his features at the interruption. "Come here," The space between where you stood and Jay was a couple of feet, having to go around the man in the process as he had backed you into the wall moments ago.

Expecting for him to allow you to move without resistance this time, you go to step around him but he still continues to block your way. Going as far as grabbing hold of your arm causing your eyes to widen and pull back instantly. The anxiety that grew in your stomach elevated significantly, it was wishful thinking that having four grown and tall men would have the single one back down but it seemed he was crazy enough to not care about that.

"Stop being a fucking creep dude," Heeseung spoke up, growing rather frustrated and particularly peeved that he had the audacity to grab you. If they hadn't shown up he couldn't imagine what he'd attempt.

"We're not done talking," The man sneers, the tone of his voice causing the hairs on your neck to stand up, goosebumps forming along your skin though your body felt like it was burning up inside. "You the boyfriend?" He adds, nodding toward Jay who faltered, confused by the sudden question.

Jake lets out a small sigh, growing tired of the back and forth. Stepping forward, he holds out his hand to you without a word. Now a mere foot apart, he stares down the guy, almost taunting him in attempt to do something. Quickly, your hand latches onto his, albeit clammy from your nervousness but as he pulled you into his side, you felt significantly safer than before.

Tucking you behind him, Jake walks you both back a few steps, returning to the rest who had moved up closer. Still holding tight onto Jake's hand, you grasp onto his arm as well, holding it as if it were a security blanket and would make everything better.

"I am," Jake answers, taking the rest of you by surprise. His fib was believable, you clinging to his side playing the part and the boys merely went along with it. "We done here?"

The man didn't say a word, the silent stare down that occurred between Jake and him more than enough. Finally, he looked away, accepting there wasn't anything he could do to win in this. Whatever that was. Turning around, Jake began to lead you away, not bothering to look back as the other three followed behind, ensuring he stayed in place as they went.

You let out a shakey sigh, deeming it far enough away as you could see the exit. Feeling the ever-growing tears weld in your eyes, a few began to slip from the corners painting soft streaks down the apples of your cheeks. Silently, Jake allowed for Jay to pull you into his embrace, presuming having the one you were closest with to comfort you would be best.

A quiet sob slipped past your lips upon being wrapped into his arms. Jay let out a small shush, one of his hands rubbing small circles with his thumb against your back, visibly upset by how affected you were as he tucked his head down toward your ear, whispering words of reassurance that everything was okay and nothing would happen.

Heeseung tapped Jake's shoulder, nodding him along to give the two of you a minimal amount of space but also linger close enough in case the crazed man decided to have second thoughts and come back. Meanwhile, Sunghoon had made his way over to one of the cashiers, explaining the situation and how the female staff should be cautious until security had eyes on the man.

Jake glanced over as Jay had pulled back from the hug, his hands on either side of your face as he wiped away the tears that kept falling from your eyes. His heart tugged at the sight of you, looking utterly disheartened with a slightly red nose and your mascara beginning to smudge.

He's glad he answered.

#jake #jake sim #sim jaeyun #enhypen #jaeyun x reader #enhypen jake #smut #jaeyun smut #IM SO EXCITED THIS IS FUN

[hueningshaped]

★ between the two of us | c.bg

▰ genre: f2l-uni au w lots of fluff and angst

▰ word count: 10.7k

▰ synopsis: you and beomgyu have to cross new checkpoints everyday it seems when it comes to your friendship, one that has overcome the barrier of being online to real life. being friends in person is hard for you but you realize you love beomgyu enough to brave your own hardships: all for the better — ft the tubatus

warnings: mild cursing, fire in building briefly mentioned, insecurities/struggles and thoughts of body/face dysmorphia, face mask use but not in covid way but in the 'words bubble up like soda pop' way, severe anxiety, burnout, some depressive thoughts, details of eating (habits), arguments, someone gets a stress induced cold, RUSHED RAMBLING

dedication: this is for the one i adore greatly, to my infinitely loved apple of my eye, @gyurecs ! i finally finished it…. never saw this coming… while there are a thousand things i could tell you, i’ll just say that i love you ! i love you so much there aren’t enough words to describe; you are the light of my life and you deserve everything you’ve ever wanted and more ! 

▰ tag list: just @tyunlatte B) my beloved

ACT I.

Nothing beat the feeling of returning to the refuge of your own dorm, free from prying eyes, annoying people, the summer heat, and in today's case, psychotic professors who want to risk your life for the sake of an exam. 

Everyday when you came home from your tiring classes, it became tradition to do chat with your online and dearest friend. It was one of the things you looked forward to everyday. Sure, you both texted every second of everyday, but just to know that you shared the same screen, got to unload and refresh, while watching some silly videos — it meant a lot to you. No matter the weather, no matter where you were on any single, given day, you always made time to do so, and so did he. 

Your dearest friend, Beomgyu. 

Back to the new twist in your day, today, you came in hot with quite a story to tell, on how the fire alarm had gone off during an exam in your biggest class but your crazed professor, in fear of having anyone possibly cheat, had made everyone remain in their seats. Everyone’s phones had been taken away, so you couldn’t even call authorities. 

Long story short, the doors were broken into by other staff, your devices were returned, your professor was suspended, a fire had actually burned the student center, and everyone received an A on the test, on the class overall, but details were still being worked out. 

Despite the craze and near-death experience, you were oddly happy, but you think it’s because you get to retell the story to your favorite person.

from: beoms

I HAVE THE CRAZIEST STORY TO TELL YOU

from: you

YOU WILL NOT BELIEVE WHAT HAPPENED TODAY

Your phone vibrated as soon as you sent it, making you chuckle, but the startling realization of you both texting the same thing, at the exact same time aligned a bit too coincidentally. That thought was brushed off quicker than you had even realized. It was funny that what had occurred had even happened at all. Life just liked to be silly, and you were more than thankful for the few times it chose to direct its strange happenings on anything but you.

It had roughly been three years since you’d officially befriended Beomgyu, an internet friend that you’d met over the bonding of the beloved IU on a Twitter page, then coincidentally through the comment section of some TikTok, leading to the further exploration that you were the same user that you’d previously met as. Again, all those coincidences. Happenstances. It was fate, a matter of it that was just funny, nothing serious. Just like the two of you.

Talking to each other had been the easiest thing, even now, it was one of the things you looked forward to the most. Your friendship was a serious one, but not once had you ever considered ever meeting — much too afraid of him being disgusted or scared off by the real you. Only once or twice had you seen pictures of the other, never facetimed (again, too scared to do so), but he never pressed. Disgust was a rather harsh word that you never really confirmed in your head, but it wouldn’t be a lie to say it didn’t exist with regards to you. 

He’d send videos of himself with his friends, of his beloved parrot, Toto, he’d make his brother or his parents record him doing the random-est things, of him playing a few written melodies or covers on his guitar, even on a recorder (he’s sent you videos of him playing these instrument to wish you a happy birthday), of him simply talking about his day, and it became violently apparent of how fond he was to you to the point that every time you heard that soft, tender lisp of his, sweet and winding inflections in his tone that never quite sat still, your cheeks would rise to your eyes and ache with how hard you smiled. He had been your dearest friend throughout all the years just the way you were to him. 

Throughout your friendship, Beomgyu never quite stayed in the same place: having to move around a lot, too. Despite events that would knock you and him from being able to communicate, nothing could tear your friendship. Not distance, not life-shaking events, not even homework, but you’d made it a point to study as much as you could, alongside your work, to make time to talk.

This was why you dropped your bag down in its same spot, peddling to your desk to text Beomgyu now that you’d returned safely from school. You had tripped over a few things, stubbing your foot, gaze buried deep within your phone, navigating through your newly organized home screen so that it’d look cute, and then at last, you finally accessed your messages. 

from: beoms

WHATTWAAHTHTH YOU GO FIRST

from: you

NO YOU

from: beoms

BFFR

from: you

GYU U GO FIRST

from: beoms

fine 😒you’re so rude ….jk BUT ANYWAY ITS A LOT BUT THERE WAS A FIRE AT MY SCHOOL AND MY PROF MADE US STAY IN AND WE WERE GONNA DIE I SWEAR Y/N I S2G THE LAST THING I WOULDVE SAID TO YOU WAS ‘im so hungry im gonna start chewing on my sleeve’ LIKE HUHHHHH

Your stunned silence was thick enough that it permeated through the screen. You did have your read receipts on, and Beomgyu was definitely not a fan of being left on read. It surely just must be a coincidence. Sure, some things here and there have hinted at the slightest, thinnest possibility of you and him being in the same timezone, let alone the same area, but this was just the higher powers of life arranging life in a silly way to blast coincidence. Surely, that was the case…right?

from: beoms

IM OK THO I PROMISE!!! no need to cry and sob and d word over me almost dying a fiery death at the worst place possible

Y/N? are u still there? :0

from: you

freaking beomgyu 😭 if ur going to say dying u might as well not use d word in the same sentence ur sooooo 

from: beoms

ok AND???? ur not even worried about me almost dying and the fact that the fire was bad enough it burned down our student center, ur sick!!!!!! ur going to h-e-double hockey sticks….

The more he talked, you felt like the closer you were to falling sick.

 

from: you

stop..talking….

from: beoms

HUH ???!! if u hate me jus say it 🙂 i can take it 🤧 no but fr i can take it now that my uni gave me an a for the whole class since my prof got suspended hehehehe anyways WHAT HAPPENED TO U PLS DONT TELL ME ITS A BETTER STORY THAN MINE

You laid your forehead against your cold desk, nose and mouth hanging over the floor. Every probability of every possibility didn’t seem plausible. There was no way that fate worked that way, but you had to test the waters out before you truly allowed your heart to pound right out of your chest.

from: you

beomgyu what is ur professor’s name…..

from: beoms

for why

from: you

oh thats really his name? 

from: beoms

u deserve cruel and unusual punishment btw oh and his name is dr. mathias something rey 😻 he’s got a king name and sorry Y/N can’t remember crap

You gasped once your eyes found the name of your own professor’s name on the syllabus that was loaded on a different tab. There in fine print: Dr. Mathias Flores Rey. The same person who’d jeopardized your lives over cheating…both your lives… yours and Beomgyu’s… a person you never thought you would have met at least any time soon. 

from: you

im going to need u to not freak out with me bc i already am……… but im 99.999999% sure we go the same school bc we have the same prof and we have the same class and we had the exact same thing happen to us…….. but idk maybe its just a coincidence lol hahaa could be mandela effect lol haha sorry i had to discover this sorry BEOMGYU LAUGH WITH ME PLE A SE

It was his turn to leave you on read. 

This freaked you out definitely a lot more than it should have. The logical part of your brain chided the anxious part, which was the majority, saying, ‘This is a good thing! You’ll finally be able to meet! Isn’t that what you’ve wanted?’

But the anxious part was a bit more in control. It for sure had a hand in just about every part of your brain, as it had for so long. So, rather than be able to enjoy this discovery, this wonderful surprise has made you come face to face with the struggle you’ve had your entire life.

Violent buzzes pulled you suddenly from your thoughts, breathing a bit seized but deflating as soon as your eyes you found the culprit of sound: Beomgyu’s contact name and picture taken over the entire screen with an incoming call. 

Hesitantly but with a shake of your head that whisked such delays away, one swipe and his thunderous giggle-scream filled the air of your silent room. As joyous as you felt about the potential lack of distance with your longtime online friend, a part of you felt weary. In the reflection of your screen, you could see your lips pursed, the bottom tucked between your teeth, set on peeling the skin on it. The sunshine, which had blinded you for much of the day, was hidden behind the black out curtains, tinting the world dim and gray. Just the way you felt inside.

“Hello?! Y/N, I’m so mad at you… how dare you even think for a second that you should apologize for discovering this,” you forced out a laugh in response, which in turn made his voice lower. “Is it really true, though? I-I don’t want to get my hopes up… I mean, I’m over the moon right now, but I mean-well… you know what I mean, right?” 

While a tide of doubt swirled in your mind at the possibility of him being disappointed by you, which you felt was inevitable, the exhale that drafted from your lips registered as a sigh for him.

“Y/N, you alright? I didn’t bother you, did I?” Because of the years you had behind your friendship, you knew Beomgyu well, especially what he needed. Immediately, your voice thinned out and you made sure to reassure him to the best of your abilities. 

“I’m good, Gyu. I promise you didn’t bother me. I’m… well, yeah, it’s all true unless you don’t belong to an introduction to linguistics class that meets from 12:30 to 2:15 every Monday, Wed—”

“Holy shit.”

“Wednesday, Friday, and our prof is named Dr. Mathias Flores Rey, and he’s most likely getting his doctorate taken away, then it’s not true.”

“It is true! It is true!” Beomgyu barked into the speaker incessantly, screaming then laughing loudly, which made you smile contagiously. He just had that effect. The birds chirped and the sun bled in the room from behind the curtain as you joined in laughter. Brief moments like this lowered the volume of the anxiety that pulsed through your veins. They were nice. Brief but so nice. That was what made them special.

“So, when can I meet you? You live on campus, right?” He asked, still full of excitement, and your wavering breath brought reality back to the film of your eyes. “Yeah, I do, and um…” Back and forth, your head turned to look around at the room, almost like you needed to be reminded of where you were. Of who you were.

“I’m still on campus, Y/N. That is if you wanna meet up still. I mean, it’s been a long day for both of us, so we can do this another day. No pressure.” He sang out the last word but a part of you still ached for him even if he possibly wasn’t bothered by your possible decline. Like an inkling, you felt like you needed to reassure your dear friend and always make sure his feelings were good, that his heart felt safe, and that he felt okay at the very least. None of this could even be close to a job; you loved Beomgyu dearly. He had become your close friend throughout all these years. 

He lived off campus in a shared apartment with his four other friends. Beomgyu went on to surprisingly give his exact location, disclosing his address much to your laughing shock with repeats of “Beomgyu, come on!” He went down to the apartment building and room number, giggling along with you. Back and forth of his apartment and his friends, you could feel that he was aware that you were dodging the question. 

It wasn’t too far, probably a thirty minute walk from your dorm, so you could do another day, but you also thought about the sun that was setting, the last attempts of sunlight shooting through the dips of the horizon that were soon to die down to let the dark become of the sky, and how little light would work in your favor.

“Y/N?” Beomgyu called due to lack of response to whatever he said.

“I can meet you now if that’s okay…” your heart pounded loudly in your ears, above your own voice it seemed. The person you’ve known for the past three years was soon to meet you, to see you finally, to put a face to the name, and that terrified you. 

Instantaneously, you could feel his smile through the phone. “More than okay. It’s perfect. When and where, Y/N?” 

⋆｡ ﾟ☁︎｡ ⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡ ⋆

Now, this seemed like a bad idea. Or, an idea that was born to fail.

Walking through the park, eyes flitting from your Maps app to the unfamiliar surroundings on the one part of campus you never quite visited — mainly because it was a hang out area, lots of seating areas, and well, it would be a nice place to be to read and listen to music and just relax, but it was never empty — you couldn’t help but feel like you wanted to be sick. Your slip on shoes scraped against the concrete under your feet, a painful rhythm to the thundering of your heart. 

How long do you think you can keep doing this? Thoughts like these filter through your ears, rounding your mind as sharp as a hiss but as light as a breeze. 

Beomgyu had said he’d be waiting, messaging you with live updates of where he would be and when he would arrive, and three minutes prior to this moment, he had texted:

from: beoms

IM ALIVE I MADE IT BY MYSELF ID LIKE TO THANK MY MOM AND DAD FOR RAISING ME SO BRAVE IM A SOLDIER 💪💪

You knew what he looked like, so you knew what to look for. However, it didn’t make it less strenuous on your heart. You felt like it was going to give out, your hands trembling from around your hold on your phone. He had no idea what you looked like. That scared you.

But what scared you more was—

Unruly hair, boba-like eyes, long eyelashes, pretty lips. Even with half a glimpse, you still stopped in your tracks at the knowing of who was before you. Beomgyu.

You swear you almost dropped your phone and fled the scene, but surprisingly, your anxiety had some semblance of restraint for you. 

Beomgyu really was right in front of you, seated on a bench, feet rolling left and right on the skateboard, gazing down at his phone rather pensively like he was looking at it and not looking into it. You wanted to run off.

But your feet carried you over to him, keeping some distance between you and this very guy. Voice perked up, all functions from the surprising courage of your body, all for you to try his name, “Beomgyu?” 

He looked up immediately, blinking a few times, like he had forgotten what he was doing, and it made you worry, ready to flee and forget this whole thing had even happened, but then, things clicked. It was a visual story. 

Realization slowly became of his face, from the widening of his eyes, mouth forming an ‘o’, the skateboard nearly slipping right from under him as he scrambled to stand, and his mouth stuttered on some word that you later realized was your name. Beomgyu seemed to know you even if he had no confirmation. 

“Y/N?” He asked for the fourth time, all while you pocketed your phone to nod shyly. A joyous screech from him made you flinch as he pedaled over to you, arms opening and for a second, you were sure he was going to tackle you, until he paused just mere inches from you, the proximity making you sweat even more than you already were. So close. 

It felt like a dream. Silly to say of which you’ve had many. Of meeting, of navigating the end of the world together, of being in a zombie apocalypse together, of all the craziest scenarios your dreams can create, but there were also nightmares. Of this. Of him seeing you for the first time and being grossed out by what he sees. Of him refuting your friendship because of what you look like. 

Beomgyu’s boyish beautiful smile paralyzed you, pretty features absolutely enthralling, dark rounded eyes that were full of wonder and joy that had to look down for you, curtained by long eyelashes, grown out brown hair that you’d seen through recent pictures, and the light but generous scent of his fragrance — something like lavender, linen, musk, and some other earthy scent that you swore you’ve smelled on your mom or something like that — with sun kissed skin even in the low light of the lampposts.

Your eyes just scanned everywhere, unable to resist the canvas before you. It shocked you. It pleased you. It overwhelmed you.

“Y/N,” you heard and blinked back to the anxiety that palpitated in the pit of your belly. Your eyes locked with his, that same smile on those lips. “Is it… is it okay if I hug you? Y…you’re not sick or anything, are you?” He laughed minutely at his own question, but it was moreso out of pure glee like he was unable to believe even his own eyes. 

Beomgyu didn’t seem to care too deeply about you wearing a face mask, which steadied your heart. At least that was what you had told yourself then and there. With a quick nod, pause then head shake, and some reassurance of a lie, some distorted truth to enable the disguise, you felt like a fraud who didn’t deserve to be embraced by your best friend after so long, after having been convinced you’d never even meet. Your half-covered face just smushed against his clothes as he squeezed you tight in his arms, enveloping you in quite a bear hug. Hints of flowers, of soap, of tea, of a fresh breeze were in his clothes in his scent, something you found yourself wanting to stay forever in. How spoiled were you to let yourself be here in his arms? 

Like a bomb, your rapidly beating heart ticked faster until you were the first to pull away, lowering your head but trying to make eye contact. A shimmer was in Beomgyu’s eyes, but he still smiled. 

He always smiled. 

ACT II.

One thing about you was that you had never really showed Beomgyu how you looked, and another thing about you that you didn’t know was that it scared the crap out of him. At some point, he had even told his friends about how it worried him. One of them had even suggested calling Nev and Max from Catfish, but everything, he felt, everything about you was real. You showed pictures of other things but not one ever exhibited your face, in any shape or measure. You were real. Genuine like a priceless gem. And meeting you, well, that had only immortalized that idea. 

But, you didn’t know that. 

from: beoms 

do u think it’s too early for me to tell u that i already miss u? 

After having showered and well, cried extensively while showering, you came straight to your phone to find this text from Beomgyu. Words like this from him weren’t new; he could say the darnedest things, some of the most heartfelt pieces in between the silliest, most unserious phrases. That was how his heart was: naïve in the way a child loves but just overall so pure, tender, and intelligent. 

After your hug, you both chatted about the aftermath of the fire during your class, about your schedules, about your days ahead, and it was getting darker, so Beomgyu had walked you back with the promise of plans tomorrow.  None of it had been done as smoothly as you'd wanted: you struggled to look in each other's eyes, laughed nervously, blushed, sweat, and awkwardly sauntered away from the other when the night became of day.

from: you

absolutely not :( i miss u too 

With that commitment of hanging out tomorrow, unable to quite say no when both your hearts unraveled through and through each fired up text message, time bled into the swing of things. Bidding each other good night like you always did to bidding each other good morning, again, like you always did. 

You only had one class for this brand new day, but you met up for study group, wherein you never actually said anything, but it was easier for you to learn when it was your classmates’ talking up the lectures. 

Of course, none of the content soaked in the sponge of your mind. It was dense with its own precipitation of your preoccupation of seeing Beomgyu. Again. 

It pained you. 

Because no matter how over the moon you felt about finally existing in the same time and space of your best friend, your insecurity didn’t let you enjoy it. 

And it was one thing for you to be friends online, but to be friends in real life? Wouldn’t things change?

“Wow, since when has that guy belonged to our class? He’s really cute…” while copying a few formulas for the study group lab, whispers caught your attention, making you look up, and freeze to find Beomgyu walking as naturally as can be for someone who was clearly not a part of the class. He wore a simple blue sweater, his wired headphones loosely hanging from around his neck, backpack hanging off one shoulder, and a plain, handsome smile on his face. He looked in his element. Like he belonged in any scene. Wouldn’t it be tarnished if he came close to you?

Plans to hang out together had been made for after your study group, but here was Beomgyu, joining you halfway through, coming over to you, a grin that only got bigger and bigger, with what you noticed was a coffee in one hand. Here he was coming to sit next to you, where no one ever sat, where you’d made sure no one could ever get near. 

You simply watched him in amazement, blinking, letting your classmates whisper among themselves, and allowing him to settle beside you. The process came with a cheerful greeting of your name, passing the drink directly in your hand, rubbing your fingers as he exchanged it, shrugging off his backpack, and whipping out his phone to simply place down in front of him. He even started getting out his laptop, noisily doing so, which got even more attention. Beomgyu couldn’t help but laugh at your growing sheepishness. 

“What?” He asked like he wasn’t aware of the angelic halo that shimmered off him from his dazzling aura. He must really be loved. And he was. By you.

“Nothing…!” You whispered out between breathy giggles, making room for him, and anxiously fidgeting your hand because your body felt downright stumped to be next to him. “Here’s your drink, Y/N. Sorry, I almost took a sip out of it since it looked so good.” He nudged the drink closer to you, patting the backside of your palm to give you a sweet smile. Only reason he added emphasis was because he knew you were anxious. Hesitantly, you nodded and grabbed onto it, looking into the drink before looking back up to see he hadn’t looked away from you yet. 

“Thank you, Beomgyu. You didn’t have to get me anything. Didn’t you get anything for yourself?” Everything sounded like you were out of breath, but he shook his head, shaggy hair bouncing healthily. “No problem, Y/N. Technically, it’s not a coffee but a tea refresher, so drink up and enjoy. And I finished my tea earlier then ordered yours once I was on my way.” 

A refresher that you have loved since forever. He remembered?

“Hmm…” you hummed and tried to balance giving your attention to Beomgyu, calming down, and scarcely trying to focus on the class conversation. Beomgyu’s palm wrapped around the back of your hand and squeezed in a way that made you wiggle your fingers. 

Your eyes moved from your laptop screen to his hand on yours back up to his face. “Just breathe…” he mouthed over to you. Beomgyu was typing with the other hand on his opened up document, things that didn’t even apply to him or his major, simply for you. 

As the dullness of your anxiety drifted away, you slowly were able to think a bit easier, to narrow down the “problems”. 

You had to take off your mask to drink the tea in front of him, or else you’ll look like a jerk. That was the main concern. Secondly, you wanted to make Beomgyu happy and spend time with him. Third, you wanted to get everything written down so you could study later.

It seemed like he was helping you out with that last one, and your heart quivered with the hope that you weren’t making Beomgyu unhappy, but rather the contrary. You just had to take it off to take at least one sip to show your gratitude. Just a little sip, even. 

The study group eventually died down with documents and flash cards being distributed via your group chat, but you and Beomgyu remained. One of your classmates had even turned around to give you a wink, giggling with a ‘you think they’re gonna kiss?’ under her breath to her companion. You hoped to God he hadn’t caught that…

“You ready to go?” Beomgyu closed his laptop after having basically typed all you needed; his fingers worked fast. Deadly fast. All this time, you had waited to see this skill up close. Awed as you were, you still couldn’t think straight. You hadn’t taken one sip yet. He stretched to pop his fingers, swiveling to face you in the chair. 

“Yeah,” you cleared your throat to come back to reality, eyebrows knotting and curving with worry. “Sorry… didn’t mean to shut down on you this entire hour… And you didn’t have to meet me here. You must’ve been so bored having to type up all this nonsense.” His smile appeared relaxed but kept widening with every word of yours. 

A part of you wanted to apologize for the very obvious lack of sips to your gifted drink. But, then that meant that you’d have to apologize for your appearance. But, then that would mean he’d have to look at you. And then, that meant —

“Hey, come on already~ I told you: you don’t have to apologize for anything, Y/N. This was so much fun. I got called cute today and I got to hang out with you before the real hang out. This was like a delicious appetizer, to be honest!” You surprised yourself with a laugh, making him do the same. 

“We can get some real food right now, though if you’re — ” “No!” You slapped a palm over your mask-covered mouth, blinking in shock and apologies. Beomgyu’s eyes only spoke from his expression: another blinking stare. “S-sorry… I um, can’t stomach anything right now. We can just… do what you had planned already.”

He arched an eyebrow with a suspicious face, furrowing one eyebrow and pouting. 

“If you say so, Y/N! We… um… we don’t have to do anything if you don’t feel well though.” He was standing up now, backpack on his shoulder, brave smile on his face but he looked worried. 

“I promise I’m well enough to hang out. Just have chronic tummy ache.” You commented, moving to follow him out the door with your own packed up backpack, too preoccupied over the idea of the reality that you’re going to have to show him how you look like at some point, maybe work on makeup during time apart… 

“Wow, you’re a real warrior.” He giggled under his breath as you both walked out the building onto your next destination. 

And the drink? Long forgotten by you. 

⋆｡ ﾟ☁︎｡ ⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡ ⋆

Sadly, you both were shy with each other. Sheepish, struggling to hold eye contact, giggling and blushing madly at the pace of conversation, at the gift of being in each other's presence. Still, despite the bumps in the road, it all came together because hanging out with Gyu felt natural very quickly. Like scarily fast.

For that day, his suggestion had been perfect! You’d gone out to the bookstore then the Music Store, where you each bought things: you, two novels, and Beomgyu, two CDs. After that, you’d gone to the fields to just sit and relax, Beomgyu whipping out a small quilt from his backpack. You’d teased him for his Mary Poppins dupe, asking where you could find one. He thought that comment was funny, evidence in his squeaky laugh echoing off the hills around you. Beomgyu had whipped out a portable CD player and gave you a headphone and silently read with you, hovering over your shoulder to read, and making you wait on him because he read very slow. At some point, though, he felt too close, perhaps at an angle where he could see in your mask, so you had slammed your book shut and moved to sit across from him to give a ‘what’s in my bag’ haul. Beomgyu seemed down for a moment after that, but before you could even ask, he was back to normal before you knew it. 

Interestingly enough, you both were new to the area; while you and he dormed in this area, it was new territory for the two of you, meaning new sights to see, new things to conquer. Really, that just allowed the two of you to start off on the same page. Though, it was beginning to look like Beomgyu had to put in the work for both of you.

He always texted first.

But, it probably wasn't that big of a deal.

The next day, you and he had to attend a meeting with everyone from your linguistics class that you’d both been emailed about the night before. Your professor had been fired, just like the student center, but rather than giving an A for the course as promised, you were instead to take the reminder of the course through a different instructor, who was much, much harder on you than that professor who’d nearly gotten you all killed. 

To fight off the blues of knowing the tough journey ahead, you and Beomgyu both ditched your second classes to go to the local amusement park, where you both ventured on nearly all the rides, ones that you’d never have gotten on by yourself. Due to being throttled around in the air, your mask had nearly flown off, but it stayed on, your fingers tightly knit on the sides. It was fun to scream at the top of your lungs with Beomgyu, who’d gripped tightly onto your hand for each and every one. You paid for Beomgyu’s turns at the stands to play games; the natural skilled guy he was won handfuls of plushies, one of them being a teddy bear that he generously gave to you. He’d insisted on giving you all his winnings, but that had been the compromise you came up with. 

It felt like a friendship that had always existed because it was. 

That night, he invited you over for dinner with his friends, but you’d turned him down. 

It seemed like, without even knowing, you were going to be doing that a lot — letting him down. It was strange because for someone who was severely anxious and strived to be self aware all the way down to the cells in their own matter, you were also hopelessly clueless. 

And judging by the way things turn out, it wasn’t the good kind. 

ACT III.

After a week of goofing off with the other, hanging around campus and off campus, things took a wide turn when your linguistics class started up again. You and Beomgyu decided that you’d arrive at the same time in order to sit with each other; you'd thought it through. Having each other was going to ensure your success. 

For a while, it worked out because you endured this god awful class together.

Life fell into a routine: going to class together, spending time together afterwards either studying or simply doing nothing, and outside of that, texting sparsely and FaceTime-ing also sparsely. Your workload with this new professor seemed borderline torturous with pop quizzes, strict deadlines on frequent and lengthy assignments, overlapping group projects, online and in-class discussions, and not to mention the extra work put in to reading and understanding the textbook and lectures, which hardly made sense when applied to the exams. It felt like Hell, and it was only less than the second half of the semester that you endured since the fire incident.

Beomgyu took the weight of the course change and all his other course work like a champ, visibly drained but cheerful as always.

Sometimes he'd bring you breakfast that he painfully knew you wouldn't eat in front of him but he secretly hoped you'd eat behind closed doors. Other times, most really, you brought him coffee, tea, snacks, and breakfast. You'd even formed your own study group with him, but due to his popularity and the overwhelming amount of classmates, you never showed up after the first time.

For midterms, you'd both barely made it out alive.

When Halloween had come around, Beomgyu had wanted to hang out with you to watch bad scary movies, but then you had a bad acne breakout and you also caught the flu, isolating yourself for an entire weekend.

When it came down to fall break, you and he were supposed to have sleepovers, but you'd declined that suggestion pretty hard. There was an awkward lull for a day or two after that, but you'd found something else to blame it on. Lying.

Right before finals, you'd helped him dye his hair. Messily and not professionally, might you add, but Beomgyu loved it. He sent you a selfie every morning after that.

You didn't hang out everyday since he needed his days in, especially with his boys (who you continued to decline meeting), just the way you did. It was a wonder to you both as to when you'd finally open up. There was no rush, so he said. So he said.

These past few months have been fun! Lonely and painful and ugly as your life may be, meeting your best friend in person definitely made everything better.

Yet, even after all this time, not once had you shown a glimpse of your face to Beomgyu. Sure, lots of good times and moments were shared between you. None of it ever involved eating. Sadly, this meant that you'd have to give up meals so as to not eat in front of him. A part of you still felt like a fraud no matter how much you tried to ignore it, because by hiding your face, you couldn't help but feel like hiding other parts of yourself that you felt were ugly. Sure, having been online friends with him for two years had led to you two being incredibly close, but even you were smart enough to see that not everything had to be shown, not even to someone you loved.

Sometimes that meant shutting them out...

It happened a lot, or rather, he was used to not receiving the usual responses, as were you for the other — only sending a thumbs up emoji every few days to make sure the other was at least alive.

He had sent you a thumbs up emoji a day after the big linguistics final, which had, in short, brutally kicked your guys' asses. Like badly. You had yet to see if you'd both passed the class.

That had been a week ago. You'd sent the thumbs up two days ago. And, well, since finals were done, you'd expected him to be back to normal. If he was going through something, wouldn't he have just told you? That's what you both did before physically meeting. It made you worry about him.

Because he hadn't double or triple or whatever texted you? No. Because he wasn't reaching out? No. You just worried. Wondered. Dreamed. About him. Was he doing okay? Was he eating well? How had the workload been on him for midterms? Did his roommates go through the same thing? Did they give him a hard time? You doubted it with the way he loved them visibly, audibly.

from: you

hey gyu sorry for the super late reply 😭 but how did finals go for u?

The longest it had ever taken Beomgyu to reply to you was eleven hours, and that had been a year ago when he had had a full blown family day, meaning he stayed up drinking with his dad, his brother, and his best friends. Today, he broke that record, and you couldn't help but worry. Worry in a bad way.

Maybe he stayed in to game the entire day. It didn't sound ridiculous since he had told you he gamed for hours and hours, and maybe as soon as his last midterm was done, that was what he wanted to do to relieve himself.

Throughout September, during the recesses of your daily routines, you and he would go over to each other's houses. When you'd gone to his, his roommates would always be gone (so as to not make you uncomfortable) and you'd watch him game, idly on his bed: sometimes watching a show on your phone, studying, or reading. Nevertheless, something about watching him game felt nostalgic. The thought of it did.

Piles and piles of 'you're selfish' flooded in your mind as you fought the urge to reach out physically. It wasn't even for your sake. You just wanted to know if he was okay considering the last time you'd seen each other, he had hardly said a word to you, only his face spoke: showing a tired, vacant expression. You had been too broken in your own way to do anything but give him a hand squeeze right before the exam that had taken three hours. Beomgyu had finished earlier than you, giving you a few tired blinks and a smile that somehow stretched to his eyes, before officially walking out the door.

You just wanted a real life thumbs up emoji. That was what you needed.

The measure to acquire such a sign took the impossible. It meant that you had to go to his apartment. Thus, why you had been standing at his front door for the past four minutes, fiddling with your sleeves and your face mask, fingers fidgeting in attempts to calm down enough to even knock. So much anxiety that you failed to pinpoint what it was stemming from. Beomgyu? Did he finally admit to hating you? Was it his friends? Is Beomgyu okay? Who would open? Would they ridicule you and laugh at you?

A couple of voices grew closer to the door until ultimately, curiosity collided with reality, and the door swung open to reveal a couple of very tall guys who simply stared down at you with soft, wide eyes.

"Um..." the tallest of them said while the other two just glanced between you and the others, making your heart thunder in your ears. Another person seemed to be behind them. "Why are you guys still standing here? Aw, waiting on me, aren't you guys? Oh." The owner of that voice parted through the other three like the sea, blinking at you. You recognized him through the one of the photos Beomgyu had sent you. Yeonjun.

He blinked at you carefully, slowly glancing down to your tapped lock screen where he saw Beomgyu's selfie. (Beomgyu did that, and who were you to have changed it?) It all came together on his face at that.

"Ah! Oh, my God, you're Y/N?! Come in, come in!" Yeonjun immediately shouted and stepped back. It was at your name that the others got it, too, making shocked expressions and overall ecstatic features. You were practically ushered with their hand waves, and you were also touched at how they backed up to make space for you. After briefly introducing themselves to you, they suddenly began whispering. You neared closer so as to get closer to their volume.

"Okay, Y/N, so happy that you're here first of all, may I just say, and anyway, we were about to go get food and come to bring it to Beomgyu. Still can't get over how you're the Y/N..."

"Focus, Soobin!"

"Shhh!"

"You shhh!"

"Y/N," Taehyun garnered your attention, speaking softly under the umbrella of Kai, who merely chuckled. You nodded, doing your best to see how this pertained to your best friend. He smiled warmly at you. "Beomgyu's been burnt out lately. He's had a cold for the past few days, but it's because he hasn't been taking care of himself. He's told us lots about you, but since he's been by himself, he's kinda refused to see anyone, and this whole time... well, we wondered if he would be open to seeing you. We never knew how to contact you."

"Maybe it's fate that you found us. Thank you for showing up." Kai whispered, closing his eyes gently for a smile. Had your mask not been on, they would have seen how hard your frown trembled your lips. Your hands by your sides formed determined fists. If the situation was different, Yeonjun thought he would have cooed.

"Did you come over to see Beomgyu?" Soobin asked, having to look down at you even crouched slightly. You fumbled in your gaze. It took so much to even speak now.

"Well, yeah," your voice worked. "He... he hadn't responded to me, and it's... easy for me to get in my own head, and I just had to see for myself. It's um, nice to finally meet you all. I'm sorry I never said yes." You bowed your head in shame, and they quietly booed, disagreed with little 'no, no, no''s.

"Please don't be sorry, Y/N. Everything happens at its own time. We are just happy you are in Beomgyu's life." Taehyun added, and something behind your eyes wished to give way, but there was more important matters at hand. So, you smiled and thanked them, mustering up the courage to be strong for your best friend.

⋆｡ ﾟ☁︎｡ ⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡ ⋆

Stress-induced colds were not new to you conceptually. You'd probably had one during midterms, but seeing someone you love go through something you have suffered by yourself with made the pain a lot more tangible.

They told you not to knock, letting you know they'd be in the living room if you or he needed anything, and you'd stepped in as you'd gotten a hold of the knob. Beomgyu was sleeping in a way that showed you he'd only dozed off due to fatigue. His head was dropped onto a pillow, cheek smushed, a controller loosely in his hand, a blanket haphazardly around his legs. His under eyes were sunken in. It looked like he formed a little nest around himself.

"Beomgyu..." You whispered once you had came to the edge of his bed, a hand running through his sweaty locks, and that was all it had taken to make his eyes flutter open, dazedly taking you in his sleep-ridden sights. "Y/N? No way..." he blinked as you tried to show a smile through your eyes.

"What-what are you doing here?" His voice was hoarse, almost two dimensional in its deep pitch. Red rimmed eyes and nostrils, flurry of tissues tossed right where your feet were, minute shivers — it was true he was suffering. You blinked a bit, playing with a frilly corner of his sheets, the ones you found a second refuge in throughout these past months. "I wanted to check on you."

"Why?" Through the thick of his sinuses, he sounded sad. You blinked, trying to decipher the true tone.

"Wh-what do you mean 'why'? Beoms — "

"Y/N, please... please don't hurt me more than you've already hurt me..." he muttered tiredly through weak coughs. He looked so frail curling in on himself. Your frown hardened, bottom lip wobbling, ready to surrender to a cry. "Huh?" This was becoming a nightmare somehow. "Beomgyu, what do you-how can I fix this? I'm-I'm lost, please..." he shivered, weakly trying to sit up but still doing it. On his own, having refused your help.

"Look. The semester's done and over with. You... you don't have to pretend anymore. I've tried my best to ignore the way I feel, but to me, with the way you just... I know you're the kindest person , but you can be really careless, you know?"

You blinked rapidly in attempts to divert the oncoming tears.

"Me?" Your pain came out a color you had never thought could bloom.

"Yeah!" He raised his voice a little. A part of you figured much of this was from the cold, but why did it answer your some of your biggest fears?

"I'm sorry, but I know we've been friends for the past two years, but why do I feel like you're becoming a stranger on purpose? I feel like you dislike me secretly. Detest me even. It hurts so much more to pretend, Y/N. Just come out and say it. I mean, you don't let me near you, it's like you're grossed out by me. I thought, I don't know, you'd noticed by now. I know you're hyperaware of lots of things, but it feels like you choose to ignore it. Like you wanna be cruel." You wanted to word vomit, deny everything, explain it all, but you could only stare at him.

"Are-are you seriously this pained by me not being comfortable with you?" Your voice shook, sniffles bundling. "You know, I'm not comfortable with anyone, not even myself."

"But, I'm not just anyone. At least I shouldn't be. You treat me as if you're constantly getting ready to leave but never do, can never get close enough, and it's fucking torture." Beomgyu spat, crossing his arms and looking at the wall.

"What point are you even trying to make? I don't-I-I don't understand it! All I hear is that you don't want me here!" You raised your own voice, too. He sat up at that to look at you. This was something you've never wanted to see: Beomgyu upset or mad with you.

"Because I don't! I'm telling you how I feel and being sensitive with you — "

"I am being sensitive with you!" "No, you are fucking not!" "You're the one who needs to be sensitive!" "You're the one — "

At this point, the argument was beyond you, and you both were just letting out steam on the other, like two windly taut kettle pots. It seemed like some petty fight that you both had no interest in even winning anymore, feeling the loss in the looks of each other's eyes.

"Get out of here, Y/N!" At that sharp yell of his, you'd flinched but remained strong, now glaring. No room for you to even kneel and cry. No room for you to show the true weak link in your already decrepit being. No room for you to try and fight for an agreement. No room for you to even defend yourself more than you already had. You didn't deserve it.

Just as you were ready to stomp out, fist shaking, lips sputtering in attempts to curb your cry, you found a little wiggle room.

One hand on the knob and you turned to see Beomgyu's shimmering eyes, his own mouth curling with a cry.

"Beomgyu," your voice was full again, even and calm. "If you knew... I think you'd understand."

"Yeah, but I don't." His wet, hoarse tone indicated his level of temperament.

"But, you will."

⋆｡ ﾟ☁︎｡ ⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡ ⋆

Everything else followed pretty seamlessly. The walk out the apartment came out a lot easier than you thought, considering how you avoided their eyes, apologized as you sped out the door.

The ghosting part was not.

In fact, it absolutely sucked.

You didn't lose your online friend. You lost your best friend, too, even maybe four, new friends. No goodbye or anything. Sure, it was cowardly to accept fate this way.

But, it didn't matter. Hardly anything did. There was one week left for you to remain in your dorm before you'd head home for the holidays, and even then, your plan was to continue the Bella Swan New Moon-era act you had been pulling since a few days ago. Somehow not even your insecurities that had ruined your friendship with your best friend mattered. You didn't care to look in the makeup, let alone get up to take care of yourself.

Since the downfall, you'd been lying in bed all day, rotting practically, with a sitcom playing over and over again on your laptop.

There was hardly anyone on campus since everyone had left because they finished their courses early and who wanted to be out during the cusp of winter?

The year was ending. It had been an eventful past few months. The friendship having lasted nearly three years now... You had only wished for it to last longer, for it to end better though selfishly you had never once wanted it to.

On the day before the campus closed, you decided to write Beomgyu a letter, allowing him to wield the power to throw it away or read it. Even going so far as to deliver it inside his mail slot at his apartment. Inside, you apologized for every thing you could think of, including the basis of your argument, wishing him well, reassuring him in the best way you can of your love for him, and had you been born looking like someone else, perhaps you would have been able to love entirely the way he deserved.

Funnily enough, later that day, dead in the night, despite the lack of a stamp, that letter was returned to sender by Beomgyu himself, who nearly broke your door down with how hard he had been pounding. Like the freaking police...

from: beoms

OPEN THE FUCGINK DOOR RNJNJNTRN

OPENNFNNNN!!!!!! 👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍

THIS IS THE CIA!!! FBI!!!! NCIS!!!! LAW AND ORDER!!!!! CRIMINAL MINDS!!!!!! THIS IS THE PRESIDENT!!!!!!

IM SO SORRY I WAS SUCH AN ABBY LEE MILLER PLEASE IM SO SORRY I DIDNT MEAN SHIT THAT I SAID ESPECIALLY SINCE IM JU ST DUMB PLEASE OPENNENUPPPPPP

If only you could check your phone...

ACT IV.

The truth was that nothing scared you more than being seen. You were terrified, obsessed, haunted, tortured by the way you looked. It seemed silly that at this age, you could be so afflicted by such a thing, but it had been true for much of your life, even as a child.

It seemed natural to try and avoid the discovery of such an ugly sight to the one you loved. Wasn't that what love is? This was how you protected him.

"Okay, okay! I'm here! I was in the bathroom!" You hollered on your way to the door, wondering if you'd gotten in trouble with the RA.

Once you open the door, revealing a very out of breath Beomgyu whose fist was ready to have fallen back on the door but had paused as soon eye contact was made. Those round, angelic eyes just took you in. Your own did the same, but not quite as majestically. All words eluded you.

It was freezing cold outside considering his reddened nose and cheeks, sparse melted snowflakes on his long eyelashes and dyed hair.

"Y/N," Beomgyu finally voiced.

"Beomgyu," you said calmly, in the same tone as his to tease, though it didn't do much to cover your disbelief that he was here.

He threw his head back to exhale, still catching his breath, pointer finger up in the air. You almost felt bad. Worse than how you already felt.

Wordlessly, you gently pulled him inside your dorm, shutting the door behind him as he did his best to muster up to say what he had to say.

"Do you love me?" He managed, arching a thick eyebrow, and combing his hair back away from his face. His thick lips formed a pout: adorable but so concerned.

"Of course, I love you." You said like it wasn't a matter of question. He sighed, leaning against the wall.

"No, I know you love me. I'm asking if you love me love me. You know..." It was evident that he grew shy in the way he had said it: sounding so sure in the beginning but voice lowering as if he had never admitted it to himself before then. You could feel your heart pounding in your brain, in your ears, in your eyes, screaming in your pulses.

"Do you love me love me?" You couldn't help but ask, stepping over his question, which made him groan lightheartedly. "I asked first!"

That made you both grin, ignoring the heat in your faces.

Beomgyu's eyes doubted. There was always a hint of it in his pretty eyes that reflected wonder. And you'd caught it from the moment you both collided, even before through video calls. He was real. You had never known love before Beomgyu; it felt silly, immature even. It seemed foreign, but it was because it was new.

"I do." You nod through glimmering eyes, vision getting blurrier and blurrier. It was a confident answer through body language, your ever fidgeting fingers now clutched tightly in your sleeves. "I love you. I love everything about you, Beomgyu."

There it was. A shaky breath followed by a laughter wet with tears. Beomgyu even laughed with his throat, hearty and strong, looking up at the ceiling to blink away his tears.

"God, finally..." he said under his breath, and you couldn't help but laugh at that.

"I mean it," you assured, voice thinning out. "I adore you."

Beomgyu looked giddy. He kept grinning at the ground. Despite your thundering heart, a part of you relaxed at the way he just looked so happy, simply at the prospect of your love for him. The other heavier part wailed in silence at the lack of reciprocation. He had valid reasons to not —

"Y/N, will you let me tell you how I feel about you?" His sweet but gravelly voice suddenly resounded near you, now that he had taken a step closer to you. Beomgyu smiled easily, warmth radiating from his eyes. Oh, this guy liked you liked you. Your face and body was practically engulfed in flames of intense heat and sweat. Your insecurities and fears were just a cry far quieter to the disbelief of Beomgyu just being within reach. Back. Yours.

"Gyu..." you sniffled from behind your face mask, blinking away the tears that pooled and pooled. "You don't even know what I look like. You're going to change your mind." This warning you gave him secretly felt like a plea to 'please don't change your mind' and 'please don't go'. Beomgyu made you watch him wordlessly as he brought a hand to cup your jaw through your mask.

"I don't think I could change my mind even if I tried," he whispered. "But, would you let me at least take a glance of the one person I've loved for so long?"

Your hesitance was met with absolute patience. A nod accompanied by errant tears began the process of you bringing your hands to discard, Beomgyu's hands gently covering them to help you. It was a slow process that made you nearly see stars from anxious you were for him to see your face. You hid your face, looking away to breathe in and out for the sake of yourself and for Beomgyu. And when you turned to look back up, your wet, teary eyes streamed a little more with a sob from your lips.

"My God, you're so... You're just..." His eyes did not hide the way they scanned all of your face: all your imperfections, quirks in your skin or facial composition. "I'm what?" You held your breath with rapt attention, lungs and heart seized in impatience, in fear, in everything in between.

Beomgyu sighed a big one, rubbing your jaw with his thumb and lowering his face down more to yours to tell you, "you're beautiful".

He held your face in his hands as if it was fine china, admiring each and every feature with an overwhelming love in his eyes and sweet words that dripped from his mouth so easily. "I love your nose, your eyes, look at these eyelashes, I love this beauty spot right here, you are just so beautiful. I wish you knew just how lovely I find you..."

You cried and cried at that much to Beomgyu's sad "no, you're supposed to stop crying!"

He craved to meet your lips with his, to come in and truly meet the face of the one he adored the most. Just as he was slowly zooming in, after calming down enough to cease your tears, your hand cupped his own jaw to stop him.

"Not so fast, Beoms. I have to take you out on a date first." You teased, but it was an idea way within what you wanted to accomplish. He visibly lit up, a small excited squeal resonated from his throat. "Yes, please. This time, I get to to be the girl who gets taken out on dates with flowers and stuff."

Blinking away his comment, you nodded. "I don't know what that means, but sure. I've been meaning to ask you on a date, pretty boy." You blushed at the way you could just say it freely, your face in his hands, and his in yours. His eyelids fluttered at your words.

"All for me?"

"All for you. You have planned every hangout. It is the least I can do. I want you to feel just as special as you make me feel." Beomgyu nodded dreamily at that. He felt like he was on cloud 9, having to calm himself down for the date and the kiss while openly being in love with you. All for him.

ACT V.

He could not wait a second more, so the date was the very next day.

Although you had never been good at gaming, that didn't stop you from making an appointment for a slot at a PC room that served his favorite kind of food and desserts, even beer. Seeing his face light up at the realization of where you'd brought him was enough joy to have lit up the sun. He was so beautiful, and he was yours. It was in the same area as his apartment, one that now was like your second home — now that you had four, new best friends.

You both tried playing a two person game on one PC, but since you were ridiculously terrible, the date soon turned into you watching him play. Of course, he played his games with a big pout, upset at how he missed your loser skills. His teasing laugh only sealed the deal, leaving you to resume your unfair matches in his games.

Beomgyu was a real gamer. His commentary and reactions so endearing and hilarious to watch; he just possessed such contagious positive energy. You felt so happy. The date lasted hours and even after leaving the PC room, you took him to a small arcade to play some more. He helped won you a few giant prizes, sort of as pay back for one of the first times you'd hung out at an amusement park.

Once you were on the walk back, full of snacks and arcade food, stopping by for candy for a movie night with the guys, Beomgyu led you to a stop right over the bridge that you and he would take every morning to walk to that dreadful class.

"Yes?" You arched an eyebrow and jutted out your lip in confusion. Beomgyu had insisted you not wear your face mask, if you were comfortable, and with his endless praise, you did just as he had asked. It was a miracle.

He held your hand in his, locking fingers with you and his grin turning to a smirk.

"Y/N, I just wanted to thank you..." his ears burned red. You smirked in turn this time, eyes soft and tender for him. "What for, pretty boy? You're the one I should be thanking..." he giggled heartily at that, squeezing your hand.

"Y/N darling... I just wanted to thank you for having been there for me always. And for never giving up on me, and caring for me, and reassuring me all the time, and just taking me out. I feel so special and... good... when I'm with you," his shy confession made your eyes prickle. You nodded in encouragement, so he could keep going. He obliged, leaning down to press a kiss to your knuckles.

"Especially for taking me out with gaming. It really, really means a lot to me. Not-not as much as you, but... it's just that the reason I game is because I don’t have anywhere to go. All this time, I’ve been waiting for someone to invite me to go shopping together or something like that, just something. I’d look out the window and think to myself ‘wow, I really want to go out’ because the weather is so nice, but there’s no one that’s invited me to go. Even if my friends invite me out, it’s usually night time... and then, I met you." Your lips trembled into a pout. With a chuckle, Beomgyu's thumb caught your tears that were waiting to give at your bottom lashes. "I just really love you, Y/N. I'm so lucky to have you."

"I love you, Beoms." Your words came out muffled with the way you dove in to give him a bear hug, which he accepted generously.

Being in his embrace made you feel like you were a real person in a real home; it was safe. Perhaps you wouldn't be so easily free from the weight of your insecurities and he with his own doubts, but between the two of you, you would always be together, and you could always find home.

#i finally did it mwhahhah #txt imagines #txt x reader #txt scenarios #beomgyu x reader #txt angst #txt fluff #tomorrow x together imagines #tomorrow x together x reader #beomgyu imagines

[kissingmilfs]

my darling lamb!au | lottie matthews

summary: cult leader, lottie matthews, finally finds the perfect prey for the hunt. a sweet, innocent lamb to make all hers. introduction to this universe.

cw: 18+, primal kink, oral (r receiving)

a/n: moonstone symbolizes fertility, innocence and linked w/goddess energy. dedicated to my girlfriend @pocolottie

⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡⋆

the blind fold’s lifted from your eyes and you can’t really make out your surroundings. your feet are bare on the damp, cold ground. the sound of crackling fire and owls hooting fill your ears. once your vision starts to clear, you see you’re in the middle of a circle.

everyone around you is dressed in purple. they’re all staring, expectantly. you look down at your white dress that’s brushing against your ankles. you can’t even remember how you got here. or why you’re here. your memory is still foggy and missing vital pieces.

you hear the crunching of dry leaves from the distance. the group all redirects their eyes towards the person walking down the path. at first all you can make out is her waist length hair, and her floor length red dress. the circle opens up for her the closer she gets.

the woman smiles brightly at you like you’re supposed to know who she is. the smile is familiar and warm. she extends her arms towards you. you curiously stare at her. someone gently pushes you towards her. understanding the hint, you walk forward until you’re only a feet or two apart. the mysterious woman’s smile widens even more.

“we’ve all been waiting for you, my darling lamb.”

the woman’s voice is mellow and sweet with a touch a raspiness. it’s a hint deeper than most women’s voices you’ve heard. nonetheless it stirs unfamiliar yet warm feelings in your stomach. you look around the circle again then back at the woman. searching for answers but finding none.

you feel a soft touch on your cheek. the woman’s hands are slightly calloused but not too noticeable. it certainly doesn’t take away from the warm sparkle in her eyes. or how she’s holding your face like you’re a porcelain doll. fragile, delicate, and innocent.

“we have to start soon. you’ll figure it out.”

the woman drops her hand from your face then proceeds to address the group.

“my faithful acolytes, the time is upon us. we’ve secured our lamb, our sacrifice. now the hunt can begin.”

the words incentive panic in your body. you nervously look around the group but no one else seems worried. this is what they were waiting for. you’re the lamb heading to the slaughter. you search for an escape but the circle is too tight. someone walks behind the woman with antlers. they’re decorated with a mesh cloth passing her shoulders, flowers, and leaves. the woman looks mystical, other worldly. she’s transformed right before your eyes into a queen.

someone stands behind you, jostling you out of your trance. a necklace is fastened and secured around your neck. looking down a cylinder shaped pendant made out of moonstone nestles perfectly between your cleavage. it’s half wrapped in a purple metal the shape of a flower. it’s a rather stunning piece of jewelry. maybe unnecessary if these people are about to kill you.

the circle starts breaking then a gong is hit in the distance. the woods become eerily quiet. your breathing picks up as anxiety creeps over you. the woman steps aside so you have a clear view of the deep woods.

“the hunt commences.”

she looks over at with a pleased smile.

“run.”

the word is uttered so softly, you might have missed it. but it’s too quiet. it’s like everyone is holding their breath. the command hits your ears and your body responds. you hold the hem of your dress darting off into the unknown woods. your feet hit the damp forest floor over and over. leaving behind footprints you’re unaware of. the only light guiding you is the half moon and the abundant stars. these woods are unfamiliar. everything looks the same when you’re running, scared for your life. it’s all a blur as you run deeper and deeper into the woods.

the antler queen hadn’t made any effort to follow you. that may have surprised you if you knew. or was even listening for someone behind you. instead the woman is preparing to find you. she knows these woods better than any one of her followers. the woman haunts these woods every night. aimlessly walking them when the moon is high. she knew, eventually, you’d tire of running and opt to hide until sunrise. it’s a logistically sane solution. it’s what she wanted you to do.

you were needed helpless and fearful. hope seeping out of you every second you ran. she needed you desperate for salvation and rescue. then the woman would appear. a beckon of hope. she had it all planned out. leading the scared, innocent lamb into the jaws of a very hungry queen.

someone presents the woman with a phone. it’s tracking your frantic movements throughout the woods. it wasn’t necessarily needed, but it would make the hunt end faster. the tracker is imbedded in the pendant snug between your bosom. the group waits and waits until you have no option but to rest.

the adrenaline coursing through your body can only last so long. soon your feet start to feel raw and your head throbs. your dress snags on a branch causing you to stumble over your feet. you land painfully on your elbows, scrapping your knees and hands in the process. the pain is exaggerated by how tired, cold and scared you are. you have zero survival skills for this situation. the thought of death frightens you. yet you cannot will yourself to continue running. your back is parallel to a tree. all you can do is sob and wait for someone to find you.

you stopped a lot earlier than expected. that’s not a problem for the woman. the blinking dot alerts her exactly where in the forest you’re resting. the woman has no further need for the device or her acolytes. she sends everyone away then starts her journey into the woods. your footsteps are embedded on the soft dirt floor making it even easier to track you. the woman follows them meticulously, putting her own feet in the tracks. your cry starts to echo the closer the queen gets. the cry of a defeated and lost lamb.

you’re found crying with your head buried between your legs. even then the cries are hard to muffle in the outdoor space. the woman’s soft footsteps aren’t heard over your tears though. she squats to your eye level and lightly touches your shoulder. you jump in fear. your watery, swollen eyes meet the woman’s face. she offers you a sympathetic and understanding smile.

“shh…it’s okay, little lamb. i found you.”

your body trembles with fear. more tears spill down your cheeks. the woman coos at you replacing the hand on your shoulder to your cheek. her thumb rubs soothingly across your skin.

through your tears and sobbing, you manage to choke out, “are you…are you gonna kill me now?”

your captor’s face contorts in confusion. “kill you? why would i do that? i’ve waited far too long for you. no, no, my darling lamb. that’s not what the hunt is about.”

the woman stands once again to her full height. she extends a hand to help you up. once on your feet she steps forward forcing you to step back. her eyes sparkle mischievously.

“no need to be scared, my sweet angel. i promise i’ll never hurt you. i have no intentions on hurting such a precious thing like yourself.”

“what do you want from me?”

the woman chuckles. she doesn’t answer your question at first. instead her hands meticulously remove the antler crown from her head. once it’s set aside, she positions her hands on your waist. she leans into your neck taking a sharp inhale of your scent. your innocence is practically seeping out of you. the smell is refreshing yet provocative. her lips brush against your skin but barely. the sensation replicates a soft breeze tickling your neck.

“isn’t it obvious? i want you. my precious little lamb—all mine.” she whispers near the shell of your ear. “the hunt isn’t over quite yet.”

you’re about to ask the woman what she means but she’s faster than your thoughts. without hesitation she sinks to her knees in front of you. a soft gasp escapes from you. the woman lifts the skirt of your dress, revealing your naked cunt. throughout the whole experience it never dawned on you that you were without underwear. the woman tips her head back slightly to stare up at you. her brown eyes are brimmed with excitement. you both maintain eye contact as her lips press against your thigh. an immediate moan vibrates in her throat.

you stare with inquisitive eyes. you’ve never witnessed such a sight before. the unadulterated hunger written all over her face. her arms wrapped around your legs as if she’s scared you’ll escape. you’ve never had anyone kiss you elsewhere but on your lips. you think you should be telling her to stop. or maybe protesting and fighting. yet your body relaxes the more her lips leave heated kisses on your chilled skin.

the woman’s nose finally bumps against your bare pussy. you jerk forward but find your balance by holding her shoulders. she presses her hand against your stomach, pushing you back against the tree. her tongue cautiously parts your folds taking her first taste of you. you sharply inhale at the new sensation. she waits for you to say, stop, but it never comes. instead your legs partly open wider, silently asking for more. you feel her tongue slowly drag down the length of your cunt. it’s agonizing yet addictive. your body senses there’s more to be done with her tongue. more the woman is holding back on. your timidity and inexperience prevents you on asking for more.

it’s all the same for the woman on her knees. even if you’d work up the courage, she needed to savor the experience. cherish every inch, memorize your taste, document your sensitive spots. the tip of her tongue curls over your clit, slowly lapping at the sensitive bud. her warm tongue juxtaposed with the cold night air enhances the sensation. your entire being feels her tongue on your cunt. you let out a shaky whimper once the minstrels turn into long licks. her tongue presses flat heading downward then the tip teases your clit as she lazily drags it upwards. she interchanges between concentrating on your clit to the long, gradual licks.

it felt wrong to have a queen on her knees, worshiping and drinking from you. every time you glimpsed down this woman is staring back at you which such adoration and marvel. even when her tongue pushes inside you and she starts bobbing her head to drive it deeper. the moans spill out of you like a hushed prayer.

“oh god…”

the woman peels back only by an inch to finally utter her name to you.

“lottie will suffice, dear.”

#yellowjackets #adult lottie #lottie matthews x reader #lottie matthews x fem!reader #lottie matthews x you #lottie matthews #lottie x reader #lottie yellowjackets #96yellowjackets

[seoheesoo]

What if Sakumo was alive and managed to save Duy from death?

[Part 4]

"Kakashi!" - a loud scream deafened at least half the village.

"Him again?" - Obito rolled his eyes and folded his arms over his chest. - "Can he live at least one day without running after you?"

Kakashi didn't bother him with a response or a glance. He turned in the direction of the scream and immediately realized that something was wrong. A moment later he was next to the teenager.

"What's happened?"

"W-we were on a mission", - Guy said breathlessly, concern sparkling in his dark eyes. - "It was a trap. We were surrounded by Seven Swordsmen…"

"Seven Swordsmen?" - Obito shouted in shock from behind, followed by a quiet shush from Rin.

"Go on", - seeing how nervous Guy was, Kakashi involuntarily turned on his commanding tone.

"Then my dad came running", - Guy clenched his trembling hands into fists. - "He told us to run away.. He.."

"That’s not all", - Kakashi interrupted him sharply.

"On the way back we met Sakumo-san. He went there too."

Kakashi met Guy's eyes and nodded to him. Without saying a word, they headed towards the exit from the village. They had almost reached the gate when they suddenly heard a voice behind them.

"Guy, Kakashi", - a firm voice made them freeze in place.

A young guy appeared in front of them, blocking their path.

"Hokage-sama!"

"Minato sensei!"

Minato looked at both teenagers with a sympathetic look.

"I’ve already sent reinforcements to them", - Minato walked up to the boys and put his hands on their shoulders. - "They'll be fine. Now go home."

"Nii-san!" - Kakashi stubbornly took a step forward.

"No, I can’t let you go", - Fourth shook his head. - "Duy-san and Sakumo-san will never forgive me if something happens to you. Now please go home."

Kakashi knew that Minato would keep his word. They had no chance of sneaking out of the village unnoticed. Hatake took Guy by the elbow and led him towards the house. Guy was silent the whole way. This unusual silence was beginning to weigh on Kakashi's shoulders. He had no idea how to deal with Guy like that. To begin with, he brought him into the house and sat him down on the sofa. Then he went to the kitchen and made jasmine tea. As Guy took a few sips, he began to look less nervous. His favorite tea always calmed him down. They sat in silence until dusk fell over the village. Kakashi took the mug from Guy's hands and put it on the table, and then sat down next to him. Guy clung to him and laid his head on his shoulder.

"I’m scared", - Guy whispered barely audibly in a trembling voice.

Kakashi had a lot of thoughts in his head. He knew that in such situations other people try to calm the other person down. But Kakashi could not utter such words, they would only seem empty and groundless. So he let the truth fall from his lips.

"I'm scared too."

At some point, they dozed off, consumed by anxiety and excitement. Kakashi instinctively pulled Guy closer to him, trying to give him warmth and ghostly calm. After some time, Hatake emerged from his slumber, hearing the heavy, metallic smell of blood. He opened his eyes and saw his father's tired face in front of him. Kakashi exhaled heavily, his heart pounding wildly in his chest. Feeling this, Guy moved and opened his eyes.

"Sakumo-san!" - the boy immediately exclaimed. - "Papa.."

"He’s fine, he’s in the hospital now", - the man answered in a hoarse voice.

As soon as he heard these words, Guy threw himself on Sakumo’s neck, hiding his hot tears on his shoulder. The man gently hugged the boy, stroking his back soothingly.

"Thank you", - Guy whispered in a completely broken voice.

"No need, kid."

Sakumo smiled softly at Kakashi, reaching out to touch him. The boy squeezed his hand tightly in his hand and returned his father's smile.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 5 Part 6

#kakashi hatake #might guy #kakagai #sakumo hatake #might duy

[peanutpinet]

You Belong with Me - Idol! Jaemin x staff! fem reader

A/N: I don’t know if I’ve mentioned this before but if you follow me on my Instagram, you might have seen my Instagram reel where I mentioned that Jaemin is definitely my comfort idol. For some reason, no matter what I’m feeling that day; whether it is good or bad, whenever I see Jaemin’s comforting yet encouraging messages, seeing him work so hard to make nctzens happy yet he himself is able to be so mature and still prioritizing others before him is just another level of my respect towards him and it just brings comfort to me and hopefully to many other nctzens

Dedication: To all nctzens who feel lost and anxious, this one is for you

Main Pairing: Idol! Na Jaemin x staff fem reader x slight idol! ex Jaehyun

Warnings: mentions of cheating, “unintentional” cheating act, violence, swearing, angst, slight possessiveness, light fluff, comforting scenes, anxiety

Additional Info: This is a slight spin-off of “Try Again” (a Jaehyun angst fic)

Disclaimer: this story is completely fiction and not a defective representative of what the members are actually like. Please take everything with a grain of salt

[08:16pm] - don’t expect too much. Don’t let your guard down. Everything seems too good to be true. Those were all the warnings that your mind was trying to tell you. But just like a hypnotized person, you were blinded by the good things of being together with someone whom you thought would be your significant other till death do you both apart.

It wasn’t until it was too good to be true that it instantly went downhill. Just as you were reaching your one-year anniversary with Jaehyun. You thought that your life was finally being put together and that you can finally see the end of the tunnel as if you were on a train and finally reaching your destination until the train took a “wrong” turn.

You, Renjun and Chenle were going around the company after a photoshoot for a Chinese magazine when you heard an unfamiliar female voice was ringing around the NCT floor’s hallways; confusing you, Chenle and Renjun.

You didn’t think much about it because you were more focused on surprising your boyfriend of almost 1 year. You were more than thankful for the universe to be able to let you to have such a caring and supportive boyfriend. Someone who was willing to risk his career for you. To take care of you when you yourself never did. To be able to give you more than you could have ever wished or hoped.

But the universe clearly had other plans because when you made a turn, there you saw your boyfriend’s back with an unfamiliar woman right in front of him who was kissing him and your boyfriend didn’t even pull away but you felt that your heart did.

Lost for words, you turn around to avoid the scene unravelling before you as you walked away with Renjun quickly following you whereas Chenle took a quick look at what you saw before following both you and Renjun.

When the three of you have gotten to one of the unused recording studios did you finally break down in front of your two friends. You dropped to the ground pulling your knees close to your chest as you slowly sobbed that you passed out.

When you did regain consciousness, you noticed you were in one of Chenle’s guest bedrooms since you have stayed at his house a couple of times just to hang out with the other dreamies. Sighing, you thought that it was all just a nightmare but when you grabbed your phone and Jaehyun’s parents’ message was the first thing you saw, you remembered that you were currently living with Jaehyun’s parents and that it was already late at night.

You quickly texted Jaehyun’s parents that you had some work to do so suddenly that you decided to stay over at Chenle’s place because the shoot ran pretty late and you had to quickly go over the shots and video before forwarding it to the head content manager. Lucky enough, Jaehyun’s parents believed you and told you to get more than enough rest and to let them know whenever you were free because they wanted to take you out.

Sighing, you take a deep breath on how to face Jaehyun and confront him. Frustrated, confused, sad, all those negative emotions started to swallow you down. Especially whenever you close your eyes, your mind would consciously replay the scene over and over again even though your heart is still holding on to that last bit of hope that it was all just some misunderstanding.

As your thoughts slowly tried to take control, you started to sob once again until you felt a warm arm wrapped around you. Startled, you almost pulled away while also kicking the person but when the person’s voice came out, your whole body immediately recognizes it and slowly lower your guard because who else would be able to calm your nerve-wracking state other than Na Jaemin himself.

“It’s not good to check your phone in the dark” Jaemin softly pointed out, taking your phone out of your hand and placing it on the bedside table

“D-did Chenle or Renjun…” you asked but Jaemin beat you to it

“Chenle told us in the dreamies’ group chat. Don’t worry, nothing was spilled to the other group chats. Rest assured that it’s just us that know” Jaemin softly replied, patting your head as you sigh in relief

“How about we go have some dinner first? You probably haven’t eaten since morning. Chenle made some hotpot for us to eat. Do you want me to bring the food to you or…” Jaemin asked but I held his hand

“No. It’s alright. Let’s go out to eat with the others. It would be rude of me to ask you to bring the food that Chenle made. I’ll be ok” you reassured Jaemin who extended his arm for you to grab

Both you and Jaemin then head out of the room and saw the other Dream members in the dining room, gathering around. Renjun, Mark and Haechan were playing whereas Chenle and Jeno were cooking and Jisung just brought out some of the cooked meat onto the dining table.

“Oh?! Noona?! You’re awake?” Jisung stated, putting down the plate of food, grabbing the other dreamies’ attention

“A-are you okay? You passed out for a long time” Renjun asked, walking towards you along with the others

“Y-yeah. I’m fine. Thank you, Renjun, Chenle, for bringing me back here” you replied back, hoping that none of the dreamies would question you just yet

“Hey, why is everyone standing? C’mon, let’s sit and eat. Chenle and Jeno worked hard in cooking for us tonight” Mark stated as everyone sat at the living room and ate together because the dining room was too small

“Thank you for cooking, Chenle, Jeno” you stated as you sat on the couch, Jaemin handing you a plate of rice and meat already

“No worries about 姐姐. Eat lots of it. No dieting in this household” Chenle joked, dividing the hotpot equally

You were more than thankful that you were closer to dreamies’ age because at times like this, you just feel more comfortable talking with them or even doing some mundane things with them because it reminds you of the times when you were in school and was having a sleepover with your friends.

Being around with friends around your age who were not judging was another level of comfort and it even made you forget about what actually happened until Haechan brought it up which the other dreamies glared at him.

“So, did you actually see Jaehyun-hyung’s face or was it from behind?” Haechan asked, earning a glare and smack from Mark and Renjun

“Dude. Can you be more sympathetic?!” Mark scolded Haechan

“Ya!! You think she was there alone? Don’t you remember who brought her back here?” Chenle argued

“Whatttt? I was just curious. I’m sorry okay!” Haechan tried to defend himself. “You’re lucky that (y/n) is nice. If it were me, I would duck tape your mouth and only open it when you have to sing” Renjun threatened

“Hyung, I don’t think that we should be arguing or even touch on that subject. Noona is probably still sensitive about this…” Jisung tried to stop his hyungs from arguing. “See, even Jisung understands the situation” Chenle argued back

“YAAAAA” Jaemin growled, grabbing everyone’s attention, slightly scaring you but Jaemin was quick to wrap his arm around your smaller body, rubbing your shoulder with his thumb. “Can’t you all how uncomfortable (y/n) is with all of you arguing? Hasn’t she gone through enough today?” Jaemin reminded the others who instantly fell silent and apologised

“I’m sorry (y/n). I shouldn’t have asked because it should be you who would tell us first whenever you’re ready” Haechan apologised and you shook your head

“It’s alright. Jaemin-a, don’t get angry at them. Everyone but Chenle and Renjun were just curious” you defended the other dreamies as Jaemin sighed, giving your shoulder a light squeeze to let you know that he’s here to support and defend you

“But yea. Though I did see his face from a side, I didn’t get a closer look at what actually happened. Maybe, I was looking at a wrong angle and just assuming….” you started but Chenle was quick to correct you

“You weren’t hallucinating, 姐姐. I also saw what happened after you turned and left. It was clearly him and that weird girl was clearly kissing him but he didn’t pull away” Chenle bluntly stated

“Ya! Zhong Chenle! Enough okay?! It’s been a long day. Let her breathe” Renjun scolded the younger Chinese as Jisung tried to get both his hyungs to calm down

“Renjun. It’s okay. Chenle is right. I wasn’t hallucinating even if I wanted to. What happened, happened. I just have to accept it” you softly muttered, all the dreamies looked sad and worried upon hearing what you said

“Let’s not discuss that further unless you want to, okay?” Mark mentioned as you nodded slowly and all the other dreamies prepared the living room to be a mini theatre

Jisung got to pick the movie because everyone was sure that he wouldn’t really choose any kind of romance film. In the end, you guys ended up watching Spirited Away because it was one of your comfort films. Towards the end of the film, everyone was slowly drowsing off and you then suggested to Chenle that everyone should stay over.

Though you were alright with sharing with any of the dream members, Jaemin debated that it was not right and you should have your own space after what happened but you argued back that it was pretty late and you felt bad that you made the others stay and if anyone had to sleep like a can of sardines, you would instantly feel worse

“It’s really alright if the rest of us have to sleep in Chenle’s room or even on the floor” Jaemin debated

“I know you guys might be alright with it. But not me. The other guest bedroom isn’t as big and probably could only fit 3 people max. Chenle’s bed could also only fit another person which leaves 2 more of you and the bed I have can fit 2 more” you argued back as the rest of the dreamies were far too lost in the debate

“one of us can sleep on the couch. I wouldn’t mind doing so. Or the other 2 can sleep on the living room couch. Perhaps even on the floor. Really. We’re practically used to it” Jaemin reasoned with you but you stood your ground

“Jaemin, if you or anyone sleeps on the couch or floor without some surface between your body and the floor, you’re going to wake up with a sore back and I don’t want that to happen to any of you. 2 of you sleep on my bed and that’s final or I’ll sneak out to the living room to sleep on the floor if any of you don’t sleep on my bed” you argued and Jaemin sighed, pulling some of his hair out of frustration

“Fine. But that 2 people should be me and Jeno because I would never touch you and I’ll be between you and Jeno so he wouldn’t touch you either” Jaemin made his final statement

“I don’t mind either of you all because I trust you guys. Now let’s just get ready for bed” you mentioned, helping tidy up the shared blanket that you guys used

“姐姐, if you’re hungry or can’t sleep in the middle of the night, we bought some of your favourite biscuits and snacks in the fridge and cupboard. Feel free to take and eat anything, alright? Good night” Chenle mentioned and you thank him

Right before you, Jaemin and Jeno head to your room, Mark called out for you. “Hey, (y/n). Don’t worry so much about what happened alright? Me and Haechan won’t say anything to the 127 hyungs but we will try to find out what happen. Don’t feel obligated to have everything figured out because you’re not alone, kay? Also, don’t feel obligated to tell everyone about your situation and that includes hyung’s parents. Take care of yourself first and foremost because I know that everything will be alright” Mark rambled whilst patting your head and slowly wiping the tears that were threatening to spill like a waterfall

After the short talk with Mark, Jaemin wrapped his arm around your shoulder and directed you back to your room where Jeno was already setting up some pillows for him and Jaemin.

“You alright, (y/n)?” Jeno asked as he saw you sniffle

“Am okay, Jen. Sorry, let me just go to the bathroom and change” you replied, grabbing your things and heading to the bathroom to change

Once you’ve changed, you saw Jaemin and Jeno were talking on the floor which made you worry that they were planning to sleep on the floor until Jaemin stated what was on your mind.

“I promise you that we’re not sleeping on the floor. We were just talking down here because it would be rude for us to sit on your bed” Jaemin mentioned and you just chuckle at his politeness

“It’s not rude at all. C’mon, let’s just sleep” you mentioned as you went towards the side of the bed that was closer to the wall

Both Jaemin and Jeno followed you shortly with Jaemin laying in between you and Jeno and Jeno who was sleeping closer towards the other edge of the bed that was closer to the floor.

“Jeno, are you alright over there? You guys can move closer, it’s still quite spacious” you mentioned, peeking your head as Jaemin softy pushed your head back down, indicating you to just lay down and sleep

“I’m fine (y/n), don’t worry about me. Thanks for letting us sleep on your bed. Good night” Jeno mentioned right at the same time Jaemin turned his head and faced you

“You sure you’re alright? You know that I’m here whenever you need a talk or vent out your feelings” Jaemin softly mentioned, stroking your hair, looking at you softly

“I know, Jaem. Thank you. For taking care of me today. You should rest. You have a full day of schedules while I have to try and ask your manager if it’s alright that I get assigned more work for you guys instead of the others” you yawned because of how soft Jaemin was patting your head

“I’ll tell my manager about that. You just FYI to him. Get some time off and just figure it out slowly. If you want to go back to your home country and take a break from here, I’ll help you. Just know that you're not alone” Jaemin cooed at your sleepy state

Once Jaemin was sure that you were asleep, he leaned closer and gave a soft peck on your forehead. “Whenever you find yourself needing someone to lean onto, come to me. Let me be the one to take care of you as you’ve taken care of all of us” Jaemin whispered, softly stroking your cheek until he fell asleep as well

For the next few days, Jaemin and the dreamies have been helping you talk to the NCT manager to help you switch your job to work more for dreamies which resulted in you not having to meet any of the other NCT members, especially Jaehyun. Not only did Jaemin help you to get your mind off of the incident, but he has also been helping you to finish some paperwork for the company so that you can go back to your home country and work for the SM branch there.

Unfortunately, the universe was once again disagreeing with you and have you meet the person that you have avoided for the past week, Jaehyun.

You had just finished one of dreamies’ new photoshoot and was waiting for them outside of the studio when you saw Johnny, Jaehyun and Doyoung walking in the hallway which made you turn around and about to avoid them but Johnny had seen you first.

“Oh?! (y/n)?! Is that you?!” you heard Johnny mentioned. Footsteps coming closer to you when suddenly Johnny was right in front of you, blocking your way and crouching down to see your face

“It is you. It’s been a while. Are you okay?” Johnny asked and you shyly looked towards the floor

Before you could answer, a familiar deep baritone voice called out to you, sending an alert to your body. “(y/n)…where have you been?! I tried to reach out to you for the past few days. Do you know how worried I have been?!” Jaehyun’s voice was firm and was holding both your shoulders to face him

Instead of replying to Jaehyun, you kept looking down, avoiding both his and Johnny’s gaze. “Why are you avoiding me?! Answer me (y/n). My parents told me that you have been working overtime. Is that true? You know that I can tell the manager if you are overloaded with work. Don’t ignore me, (y/n). Did I do something to upset you?” Jaehyun ranted, gripping his hair out of frustration

Did something wrong? You were already upset about what Jaehyun did but now, you were equally frustrated and annoyed at him. Sure, it was wrong of you to not tell him or his parents about your whereabouts but did Jaehyun even consider the chance that you know what he did?! Frustrated with the whole situation, you failed to contain your tears and it spilled out before anyone could even comment anything.

“(y/n)…let’s go have some lunch toge—hyung?! What did you do?!” Haechan interrupted and rushed to your side, slightly pushing Jaehyun away from you

“Haechan-ah…” you cried. “Ya, Lee Haechan, what’s wrong with you? I didn’t do anything. Yes, I might’ve raised my voice a bit but I was worried because (y/n) didn’t contact me nor my parents for the past week” Jaehyun defended himself but Haechan just glared at him

“Didn’t do anything, my ass” Haechan scoffed, shielding your sight from Jaehyun

“Haechan, what are you talking about? (y/n) didn’t contact any of us nor was assigned to work with any of us the past week” Johnny tried to reason

“Maybe not either of you” Haechan mumbled but was clearly heard by his hyungs

“Haechan…don’t start” you mumbled. “Is there something going on between the two of you? Like, is there something that happened that only the two of you know? (y/n), did someone threaten you? Was it something that Jaehyun did?” Doyoung asked, trying to make sure the situation doesn’t escalate

“Yea. Being angry at her when he’s the one at fault here” Jaemin growled, grabbing everyone’s attention

Not caring about the older members around, Jaemin went towards you who still not dare to actually face anyone. But Jaemin didn’t mind because he and the rest of the dreamies knew the actual truth. And that was that you were hurting yet Jaehyun doesn’t seem to have any feeling of guilt for what he did.

“What did say to you? Say the word (y/n), I’ll make him regret it” Jaemin uttered, cupping your cheeks gently; completely the opposite of his venomous words

You honestly didn’t want any of them to fight and want this moment to just pass by without any casualties that you just remain silent and only mumbled “I’m okay, Jaemin. Please drop it”. As angry as Jaemin was at his older member, he knew that comforting you and getting you out of here was his number one priority.

Just as Jaemin held your arm and was about to walk in the other direction, Jaehyun grabbed your other arm, making you stuck in between the 2 Jae who were having a stare-off with each other. Neither of them let your arm go nor avoid eye contact with each other.

“Let her go. She clearly doesn't want to be here” Jaemin warned, not wanting to stay another second longer

“You should be letting go. Holding onto her makes me think that something actually happen between the two of you and I’m guessing that you were the one that started it, Na Jaemin” Jaehyun taunted which angered Jaemin

“You know what? I feel sorry for you. Because to think that the Jung Jaehyun fans worshipped turned out so wrong because it was you who neglected her in the first place. I was the one that took care of her when you didn’t. You can call a backstabber for all I care because we both know who the real cheater is, am I right?” Jaemin taunted back, the conversation was heard by everyone in the hallway

Angry at Jaemin’s statement, Jaehyun didn’t hesitate to let your arm go but immediately launched himself towards Jaemin; both of them tumbling down on the ground, making you jump and back to the wall.

Seeing the younger men tumble and fought with each other, both Johnny and Doyoung tried to get the two to stop fighting whereas Haechan immediately shielded you from the gruesome scene unveiling before everyone.

“C’mon, let’s get you out of here” Haechan suggested, gently grabbing your wrist but feeling responsible for the situation, you yanked your arm from Haechan and rushed to get in between the two men who were now shoving each other towards the wall

Though you managed to get in between the two, neither man, especially Jaehyun actually stopped. Sure Jaehyun knew what Jaemin meant when he was called a cheater. But Jaehyun wanted to argue that he was being forced by the girl he kissed. But upon seeing you getting closer to Jaemin, not making any room for him to explain, angered Jaehyun. That thought alone was enough for Jaehyun to strike Jaemin. But instead, it was you that got hit and fell.

Seeing you stumble, Haechan was quick to rush to your side whereas Jaemin got angry and punched Jaehyun to the point he fell. Before Jaemin could launch another blow, Doyoung stopped him and told him to relax and that it wasn’t worth it.

“Don’t. Take care of her first. We’ll handle this. Especially since you’re the only ones that know what happened. We’ll ask from his point of view” Doyoung reminded, trying to stop Jaemin

“What’s the point of hearing his point of view, anyways? Did you not see that he has already hurt her emotionally and physically? He doesn’t deserve to be heard” Jaemin scoffed, backing away from Doyoung, staring into Jaehyun who was being helped by Johnny

“Jaemin! Enough!” Haechan exclaimed, making Jaemin look back and saw you being held by Haechan

“Know that I’m only leaving because I’m going take care of someone that you clearly neglected and hurt. Don’t think that I would let her go this time” Jaemin warned, turning away and helping Haechan get you back to Chenle’s place.

Arriving at Chenle’s house, Haechan allowed Jaemin to take care of you while he cooks dinner and lets the other dreamies know what happened.

“You shouldn’t have jumped in like that. I was already angry at how he treated you and how he didn’t admit that he was wrong. But seeing you get hurt because of him? At that moment, I didn’t care about either of our reputation or the fact that we were in the same group. I would give him a good beating for all I care” Jaemin admitted, slowly putting the ice pack onto your cheek

“You might not care but I do. Once images of his bruised cheek spread out, fans will start some sort of rumour. Or you never know what staff might be lurking around and spreading exaggerated rumours of you both” you replied, holding the ice

“Why do you still defend him?” Jaemin asked, pulling a chair and sitting across from you

“Why are you helping me?” you asked back, not answering Jaemin’s question, making him sigh

“Because, as cliche as it sounds, you’re a wonderful person. Your cute self, your selfless side. You’re smart even when you think you’re not. You’re caring and pay attention to the small details that not everyone might. Not to mention, you always put your effort into things even when it might seem like nothing. You deserve someone that would be that shoulder for you to lean on. Someone to be the ear for you whenever you want to ramble. Someone that is warm, safe and comforting to be your home. Someone who loves you for you and never ask you to change or do anything for them” Jaemin confessed, holding your hands in his

“Jaemin…” you whispered

“Let me finish, okay? I like you. I cared for you. It was just wrong timing. How you met him first. How he got close to you first. And how I didn’t even try to put up a fight. How I trusted him to take care of you when I should be that person. I should’ve been the one to get close to you first. I should’ve been the one to take care of you. I should’ve been the one to make you smile and be your first kiss. Call me selfish but I’m glad that his shitty behaviour was revealed because I can finally take care of you the way you deserve. Because you belong with me, not him. Even if you’re not ready to open up now. At least let me take care of you and treat you well” Jaemin softly confessed and kissed your knuckles

Somehow, despite what happened, despite how messed up your feelings and situation was, you still allowed your heart to open up to Jaemin. You allowed him to do as he promised. To take care of you, to shower you with the love and care that he promised. To reassure you every day that there is completely nothing wrong with you and how he has become your shoulder, your ear and slowly become your new home.

A/N: hi!! Your author here. Yes, I have not updated for nearly a month and I apologise because so much has been going on at work and I finally gave my one month notice and will officially resign next month.

Honestly, it wasn't really a big nor hard decision. Okay, maybe I was contemplating on it because I don't have a full backup plan on what I want to do. I really want to dive into becoming a full-time makeup artist but that really takes time and I was thinking of doing another full-time job for 1 more year (with better work-life balance and salary). I won't dive deep into why I'm leaving because out of respect towards the company (maybe next time, lmao). But I hope that I would be able to relax for once and not stress out about what might happen in the future.

Also, who tf manages NCT's schedule?! Like, yes I'm quite happy that I'll be getting smtown in my city but!!! An NCT DREAM fansign the day before and another afterwards?! When will MarkHyuck get some rest :') pray that I get the tickets to smtown because I have yet to see DREAM irl :') I miss them 5x?!?!?! I mean, if this means I'll end up with someone in dream, then by all means. lmao!!

Anyways, hope you enjoy this fic as I slowly go back to the shadows and try to come up with another fic. If you guys have any requests, do send me a request and I hope that you have a great day! Stay safe and always be happy :) xoxo vinet

#nct #nct scenarios #nct imagines #nct x reader #nct angst #nct fluff #nct dream #nct dream imagines #nct dream scenarios #nct dream angst #nct na jaemin #nct dream jaemin #na jaemin #jaemin #nct jaemin #na jaemin scenarios #na jaemin imagines #na jaemin x reader #nct jaemin scenarios #jaemin scenarios #nct jaemin imagines #jaemin imagines #jaemin x reader #jaemin fluff #jaemin angst

[spiriteddreams]

sometimes, being in love can hurt. w/ bakugou! :D warnings: angst, hurt/no comfort, ambiguous ending

"i love you." he swallows thickly, "you know that right?" bakugou stares at you from where you stand at the other end of the room, your arms hugging your body as if it was the only comfort it could bring you in the cold, tension filled room. two candles flicker in the corner of the room, side by side on a mahogany table where papers threaten to catch fire and burn, the same way your eyes burn as tears begin to sting the longer you keep your eyes open. blinking means letting the tears rush down your cheek, blinking means crying, blinking means breaking. and the last person you want to break in front of, is bakugou katsuki.

"i know." your voice is surprisingly steady, far too calm for his liking. but the tell-tale signs of your nervousness are present: a shaky inhale, lip pulled between teeth, and shaking hands you curl into fists. you refuse to meet his gaze, no matter how hard he silently begs, and he can feel that anxiety creeping into his chest.

for once, he sucks up his pride, that same explosive pride that drips from his words like pretty poison, sinking beneath the skin until it burns. he swallows thickly as he stares at you and for the first time, he can't tell what's going through your mind. it scares him, more than he'd like to admit. his mind screams at him to do something, do anything that might offer some sort of comfort. but his limbs refuse to move, the mere thought of you moving away being enough to render him still.

so where did it all go wrong? when did coming home start to feel like anxiety crawling up your arms when you twisted the doorknob to enter a space that was once filled with love. bakugou katsuki rises to the top with a triumphant grin, baring his fangs for all to see as he shows off the skills that have gotten him so far. and still, he refuses to stop, brandishing scars like medals, roaring for victories as he grins at the sight of villains cowering just at the sound of his name.

you take a shaky breath, "it's just, sometimes— sometimes, bakugou, you can be so cruel." bakugou. bakugou. not katsuki. not baby. not any of the sweet nicknames that have tumbled from your lips with such laughing adoration. just, bakugou.

"you say you don't mean things when you're upset." your voice cracks and his brows furrow. his hands twitch at his sides but just as he's ready to move forward, you look up at him and let him see the tears that are threatening to fall. "so why doesn't it feel that way?"

instantly, he's brought back to the night before, when he greeted you after a long day from work with nothing but an irritated grunt. you had tried, as calmly and patiently as you could, to coax him to open up, stepping on eggshells in the warm space of your living room until he snuffed it out. words bounced around the walls as voices rose, desperation in your tone as you refused to back down from him.

this is what it meant to fall in love with bakugou katsuki. it's harsh words and cold sneers, putting up a front and reminding yourself, after your tears had dried, that he still cared. he shows his love in different ways, and he tries his best to show that he cares.

"i'm sorry." he says hoarsely. he doesn't know what else to say anymore. he can feel the thread about to break and the thought of that terrifies him. he sees the first tear fall and his chest lurches. you brush it away as quickly as it fell and look away, up at the ceiling in an attempt to blink away the rest that have started to spill down your cheeks.

"i need to cool off." you take a deep breath and take a step back. "i've already texted mina. i'm staying at her place tonight."

he remains frozen in place, unable to move, only to whisper, "okay," as his voice breaks.

perhaps in another time, in another world where the stars were honest and the moon didn't tell lies in reflection pools, things would be different. and as you walk out the door, a candle dies out.

reblogs and comments are greatly appreciated! <3 a/n: this was supposed to be a tighnari fic but i felt like it fits bakugou better!

#bnha #bnha x reader #bakugou katsuki x reader #bakugou x reader #bakugo katsuki x reader #bakugo x reader #bakugou katsuki #bakugo batsuki #boku no hero academia #my hero academia #spiriteddreams writing #spiriteddreams

[smutracha]

Volume XI

rewind <3 fast forward

Mafia!SKZ Yandere!SKZ Afab!reader Poly!SKZ

tw: violence, blood, guns, knives, nicotine, drugging, alcohol, ptsd, sexual harrasment, mentions of self harm, depression, anxiety, bipolar disorder, depictions of death and gore

smut warnings: anal, oral(f), sex toys, filming, pet play, degradation, praise, squirting, shower sex

Monday – Minho

Waking up with Minho was always so pleasant, he would softly wake you up with a gentle voice and a light hand rubbing your back until you looked into his eyes and he could kiss you. He never said good morning, he would just kiss you before he climbed out of bed and piggybacked you into the kitchen where he would sit you down at one of the barstools so you could watch him cook. He’d always make you something extra when you woke up with him.

Partially to show his affection without having to say anything at all. Partially because it meant that you could take your pills and be fully functioning by the time the rest of the boys joined the two of you. Today it was apple and cinnamon oats, something he noticed you particularly enjoyed.

As you finally started coming to your senses, Chan walked into the kitchen in nothing but gym shorts. Hi princess, hi Lino. What’s breakfast today?” “I got oats and veggie sausage and mushrooms and an egg.” “Ooh the oats look yum.”

Minho went to grab a bowl for Chan to have what was left. “Mm, she’ll need the energy.” “Oh yeah, good luck little princess, he’s a bit of a sadist. And a major ass man.”

After breakfast, Minho led you to the shower where he washed your body with gentle flicks at your nipples every so often but when he decided he couldn’t handle just looking anymore, his mouth followed. His lips sucking and biting and gently teasing you had you whining for more. “Ask properly, little kitty.” “Please give me more, need more.” “Master, that’s what you will call me.” “Master, please give me more.” “Good kitten.” He was on his knees before you in no time, hooking a leg over his shoulder so that your wet, puffy folds were right in front of his eyes. “So wet already kitty.” “All because of master.”

He slid his tongue gently over your slit, repeating the process again and again. Tongue starting lower, every time. And like that he sat there, lapping at your ass, while his fingers toyed gently at your clit. The feeling sending you to a newfound bliss. “Master, please.” ”Please what, kitty?” “Fingers please, master.” “Where? Where do you want your master’s fingers?” “In my…” you were too shy and ashamed of yourself to even say the word. “Where, kitty? Could it be here?” he says poking gently at the hole his tongue had been so focused on just before. “Say it, kitty. Say it for your owner.” “Please put your fingers in my ass, master.” it was a shy whisper. “Say it properly, dumb kitten.” “Please finger my ass, master.” “Good kitty.”

“Here you go.” He snickered, plunging a finger inside, the feeling making you cum immediately. It was a whole new world of pleasure. “Oh poor kitten. My dumb little anal whore kitty. Did you cum from just that? Perfect.”

He shut off the shower, quickly wrapping you in a fluffy towel before picking you up and taking you to his personal room. “On the bed, all fours.” You got into the position he wanted, facing the headboard. You couldn’t see as he rummaged behind you but soon enough he came over to sit next to you. He set down a plush cat tailed butt plug, some lube and a dildo. “This dildo is special, my pet. Wanna know why?” you nod with large eyes staring at the blue cock. It was long and curved and an average girth. It had you drooling already, “Drooling over your master’s cock already? Dumb whore, this dildo is special cause it’s modelled after me. We got these so that you could have us when we aren’t able to help you. But look how handy they are.”

He wandered back to where he was and came back holding a pair of cat ears and a collar with a bell. Black and pink. it was all so co-ordinated. He adorned you with the items as he settled his hand roughly on your throat, digging the leather of your baby pink collar into your neck. “You’re gonna suck on this cock while daddy gets you used to your new tail, kitten.”

He placed the fake cock on the headboard for you to suck and drool on. After settling in behind you he pumped some lube onto your sensitive hole. The sudden cold making you jerk forward in shock but the second you felt his fingers rubbing over it, you moaned around the beautiful dildo in your mouth. “Good girl. Just relax.”

But that’s as far as his sweetness went it seemed. Without any warning, he had two fingers pumping into your ass, stretching you open before he spat into it. A wave of cum spilling from your pussy. “Oh dumb kitty, you must love this. God you’re just so perfect, can’t wait to fuck you.” You were already cock drunk; his words hardly even registered. Immediately after his last word he added another finger, landing a harsh slap to your clit to wake you up, he laid out an instruction “From now on, you only cum when I allow you to cum.” You moaned out an agreement around his fake dick. He stretched and pumped and fucked your ass into oblivion with his fingers.

He pulled his fingers out after some time. You were so far gone that you hadn’t noticed the butt plug disappearing from beside you. The cold push of metal against your ass causing a shrill shriek to sound in your chest. But the sound was muffled, and he scoffed at how pathetic you were. He pulled your hair to bring you off of the dildo, “Wanna hear you.” the plug pushed halfway in as you moaned at the sensation. Then it was pulled back, he kept half-fucking you with the plug. He lowered his head and his lips wrapped around your clit, making you scream in pleasure. You could feel yourself getting closer and closer. “Master, master please. Need to cum, master. Master, wanna cum. M good kitty, cum.” You were a babbling, drool covered mess as he popped his lips off of your clit and yelled “Cum!” before shoving the plug fully inside of you. You squirted on his chest, colours dancing in your vision as you let the orgasm wash over you. “God kitty, might need to shower again. Let’s get you cleaned up.” He rushed off to get a cloth to wipe you down, before doing the same for himself. “Come on, let’s get you some cuddles. What do you need?” “Wanna watch Daria and want water and sweets.”

He'd dressed you in a tiny skirt that barely covered your plump ass, allowing the tail to be seen perfectly. As well as one of his comfy knit sweaters. “Oh my god, you’re so cute my little kitten.” You stopped by the kitchen on your way to the screening room. Turns out the boys had gathered there for lunch.

“Oh, oh my. That’s-“ “Hot” “Did anyone else just nut too?” “Ew” “Man you ruined it” “Yeah”

“Okay if you could stop being weird, maybe you could come join us for aftercare.” “How is it aftercare when my little Pixie’s ass is stuffed like that, she’s still new.” “New? Hah.” He scoffed leading you out of the room while the rest followed. “she came thrice, just from me playing with her ass. She’s just an anal kitty now.” You blushed as he fawned over you and how happy you were making him, if that wasn’t enough, the feeling of being so full and the plug moving with every step had you practically dripping.

“Gonna have to do something bout the mess she’s making.” Hyunjin adds while watching your slick thighs rub and jiggle with every step. “That reminds me, I gotta have my sheets cleaned.” You reached the room, and he led you to sit in his lap while he instructed I.N what to put on for you. Sitting in his lap only pushed the plug further into you, making a moan spill from you. The pleasure brought tears to your eyes. “Holy shit, that’s hot.” “We’re only halfway through the training kitten, you’re already so broken.” You mewled at his hands running up your sides as his lips found purchase on your neck. He broke away as the intro song started. 5 episodes later, he decided it was time to finish his training on you.

“Remember baby, cum when I say so.” You were on the bed once again, set in what he told you is called ‘humble’ position. You were to put your ass on display while your back arched as you rested with your arms stretched out before you. He tugged lightly at your tail. Sending a shiver through your body and making you mewl loudly while he started pulling the plug out. You felt the way your aching hole stayed open, he groaned at the sight. “God, baby. At this rate m gonna lose my mind. You’re really made for me, aren’t you. I need to have this ass.” “Master, m yours. All yours, please fuck me. Need master.” “Fuck kitty, you’re making this so hard. I’ll give you my cock soon enough. For now, you’ll have to take a copy.” He rounded you to stroke your cheek gently while his fingers pumped your puckering hole. “is that ok, kitten?” “Yes master.” “So good for your owner, here let me lube you up.” He went to look at your ass again. You felt his spit land on and mostly in your ass just as you heard the sound. Your hips bucked backwards at the degrading action. God he really had you a mess so soon. “And to think you were so innocent, so unbroken only a few hours ago. What happened, pixie?” You could only whimper in shame at his degradation, what was more is that you loved every second of it. “Did your owner do this, baby? Did I really turn you into a cock-dumb bitch?” “Yes, master.” “Well then, let’s give you more. Let’s really break you.” He suddenly shoved the dildo into you. The feeling was amazing. The way you felt every ridge, the subtle curve and the head of it brushing your wall with every thrust. You were gone, drooling and whining. Not a single thought in your head. He stopped for a second, the pause making you open your lust blown eyes, only to find his phone set in front of your face. “I wanna show the boys just how pretty you are, how good you are. And all this just for a plastic cock, whore.” He went back to viciously fucking you with his dildo. “Who owns you baby?” You could only whimper and whine in response. His thrusts only became more volet. “Answer me you cock-hungry slut.” You were screaming with the cruelty of his actions, the pleasure overwhelming every cell. “You own me, master!” You screamed out. “Cum for your owner. Cum for me kitty!” And like that you blacked out in bliss. White flashes bursting behind your eyelids as you squirted all over his arm.

“So good, baby. So good.” He gently rubbed your back, pulling you up into his arms as he picked you up. He grabbed his phone too before carrying you into the bathroom. He sat you on the bathmat. “Gonna run us a bath ok, angel?” He opened the faucet, while the tub filled he held you gently. “You did so good baby, so good.” Soft kisses peppered your face as you giggled in spite of the drowsy state you were in. He stripped himself of his clothes and you of your ears and collar.

As you both settled into the tub he laid you on his shoulder. “It’s ok baby, go to sleep.”

You were wakened as the sun settled over the horizon, to a gentle voice. Met with Minho’s soft smile, he told you it was time for supper. “Come, I’ll carry you.” And indeed, he did. The boys sat chatting amongst themselves as you entered the kitchen, being brought to a seat. Only your food was left at the table. Minho placed you on his lap so that he could feed you while the boys watched. Their soft smiles making you feel warm. “Why you all staring?” “Just heard some screams earlier. You have fun with Minho, little fairy?” Hyunjin asked you.

They all laughed at the blush you tried to hide in your hands. “You must be a bit tired huh, baby? Who you cuddling tonight?” “Want Seungie” “Me? Really? I must be the luckiest guy in the world.” “Minho just had her ass dude; I think that trumps cuddles.” “I haven’t had her ass till I’m actually fucking her full of my cum.” An unanticipated moan filled the room as you felt the wetness rush to your pussy. “Wow she really is cock-hungry for her master, huh?” Changbin chuckles at your state. “Oh my god, you showed them that?!” “I said I would little kitty. By the way, they lost their minds. I’ve never seen Felix so desperate before in my life.” “She doesn’t need to know, Minho.” “Look at you, but I couldn’t get a coherent word out of you while you lost yourself on my cock. All of that from one clip of your precious pixie taking it up her ass. My pretty Lixie.” “Hyune, you know that’s not fair; you really know how to use me.”

“Seungie, sleep?” You found yourself drifting off even as the boys teased and argued about their sexual habits and performance. “Come little pup. Let’s go.”

#skz ot8 #yandere skz #poly!skz #skz mafia #stray kids x you #stray kids #stray kids mafia au #mafia!skz #stray kids smut #stray kids yandere

[onceuponastory]

give me thunder, give me lightning - the winter soldier x reader

Part Five of my Ghost Story AU - Find the series masterlist here

Plot: In the aftermath of HYDRA's return, things are rebuilt and redefined. Pairing: The Winter Soldier/Bucky Barnes x Female!Reader Warnings: Mentions of death/murder, violence, injuries/bruises (not too graphic though), weapons, nightmares, trauma, anxiety and angst. Once again, everything Bucky did as TWS and had done to him by HYDRA is a trigger. As always, if I miss any triggers, please let me know. Notes: We made it to part five! Technically the final chapter? As always, thank you for enjoying this story so much. Here's a link to the song this chapter is named after, Take Me Dancing by The Maine. You'll need it for later ;)

Not beta’d, so any mistakes are my own.

“W-What did you just say?” Y/N asks. She hopes this is just a mistake, something she misheard. Even the possibility of Bucky playing some cruel practical joke on her crosses her mind.

For a moment, she wonders if she was the one who got shoved backwards, who slammed her head against a table and is now lying against a cold, hard floor. If this is merely a dream, or a hallucination in a damaged mind.

Because Bucky, protective, loving Bucky, who looked at her like she hung the moon and stars in the sky, who listened to every single one of her stories about growing up and her family, even the boring ones, hanging onto every word, who at least said something when she spoke to him… now stares back at her like he doesn’t even know her. 

Even death would be better than this.

As Bucky begins to walk towards them, she registers Steve saying: “Y/N. You should go. Let us handle this.” but she ignores his words.

“Bucky?” Silence. All Y/N can hear is the pounding of her heart. No recognition comes from him, and he continues to move forward, keeping his stare fixed on the trio. He’s like a completely different person, a shell of his former self. HYDRA must’ve wiped his memory again, or activated his trigger words again.

And that thought scares her to death. Not because of what Bucky could do to them, but what it means to him. Even as he bears down on them, all she can think about is how much this has messed up his healing, and how they could ever possibly fix this.

Steve and Sam try to fend him off, to break through his programming once more. And they put up a good fight, but Bucky’s moves are fluid and rapid, too calculated for them both. Whilst they’re cautious about harming him, he's not. He blocks every one of their attacks with ease and quickly deals out ones of his own. He shows them no mercy, dealing out punch after punch. Finally, Y/N sees the full extent of what Bucky’s capable of, the soldier HYDRA trained him to be. 

And although she knows (or at least hopes) that Bucky wouldn’t hurt her, seeing him like this terrifies her.

“Y/N. Get out of here. Run.” Steve repeats, but she has no time to respond before Bucky throws him down.

And then, there’s nothing to protect her, nothing separating them both. Bucky stops in front of her, panting. The same pair of silvery blue eyes, now empty and cold, stare back at her. Immediately, she’s back in her grandma’s house again, facing Bucky for the first time. And now, she must fight for her survival again. But this time, it hurts even more. This time, there’s so much more at stake. For all the times she used to worry about Bucky trying to hurt her, she never actually imagined it would happen, or thought about what she would do if it ever did.

So now, she has no idea what to do, or how to save herself. 

“Bucky, please.” The words leave her mouth as a strained gasp. As if her words could undo the decades of torture and suffering HYDRA put him through. But that's all she can do. It’s all she has. Steve and Sam, they’re superheroes, with weapons and other resources at their disposal, and that didn’t even work. All she has is her love for Bucky, and her want to bring him back.  

And this time, she’s not sure it’s going to be enough. 

But she has to try. She’s the only hope they have right now.

“Bucky. I-It’s me, remember? Y/N?” She’s aware of her voice cracking, a sign of the fear and pain of the last god knows how many hours finally taking their toll on her. And she hates it. She wishes she could be strong. Show Bucky that she’s not afraid, and that they’ll get through this together. But she can’t. “You met me at my grandma’s house, remember? It was a lot like this, actually.”

He’s silent. All he does is stare at her, calculating his next move. HYDRA told him to eliminate all their enemies here. He’s already fended off two of them with ease, and now it’s her turn.

So why hasn’t he done it yet?

“Everything’s different now, though.” She chuckles awkwardly. “But I know you’re still in there, Bucky, and I’ll bring you back, no matter what I do.”

Why won’t she stop calling me Bucky? He thinks. Why is she staring at me like that?

Yet, just as soon as his programming kicks in once more, and he readies his arm to eliminate this threat, another voice sounds, breaking through HYDRA’s orders. Fight it. Fight back. She’s right. Trust her. And he feels compelled to listen to it.

“Your name is James Buchanan Barnes. We all call you Bucky. You used to love it when I’d play my grandma’s records for you. You loved The Rolling Stones, but I think Ella Fitzgerald was your favourite.” His broken brain tries to put the pieces together, tries to find the song she means… but all that comes through is a garbled mess. The clearest part, though, is HYDRA’s programming. Fight it. The voice says again. Don’t let them destroy you again. But their programming is just too strong.

“Stop it.” He hisses. “Shut up.” She’d be lying if she said his coldness and cruelty don’t hurt, and she has to remind herself that it’s not actually him saying those words. She just has to persist. She has to bring him back.

“Remember the night I fell asleep, and you covered me with the blanket?” There’s a tingle up his human arm then, a feeling of soft cotton tucked around a sleeping form. Of the golden rays of the sunrise flooding into the room, warming his body. His heart starts beating faster. She looked so beautiful then… so radiant. “I was so afraid of you. I thought you were dangerous, and that you’d kill me right there and then. I must admit, a part of me thinks that, even now. But I know you won’t. I know it’s not you, Bucky. You’re not a monster. You never were.”

He registers shouting in his ear, furious voices ordering him to go out and kill everyone who stood in their way. Despite being reactivated by HYDRA again, he knew something was wrong, that some part of him didn’t want to do this. Suddenly, the mask shifts, and Bucky Barnes starts to break through. “Y-Y/N?”

Unfortunately, almost as soon as it shifts, HYDRA’s programming kicks in again, and he’s back to the soldier he once was. ���Stop it.” He hisses.

“Never.”

“Why are you doing this? Why are you trying to save me?” He demands. Yet, his face shows no anger. It's more sadness than anything. As if he remembers just how brutal his life is, and that he’s already accepted he’s not worthy of love.

“Because I love you.” She wants to say, wants to shout it from the rooftops. It’s what she almost says, but the words get stuck in her throat. “Because I know it’s not you. It never was. You don’t want to do this, I know it. Please, Bucky.” She steps forward, closer to him, into the line of fire.

“Stay back.” He orders, pointing his gun, but she doesn’t stop. 

“Bucky, this isn’t you.” She repeats. “Come back to me.” She’s crying now, hot tears streaming down her cheeks. Her tears register something in his mind. This isn’t the first time he’s seen her crying, or pointed his gun at her. 

How does he know her? 

Why does he know her?

“Say it’s only a paper moon, sailing over a cardboard sea.” She sings, her voice soft and quiet at first. For a moment, she notices something in Bucky’s expression. It’s as if his programming slips again, and he hears her words. And they mean something to him. It’s almost as if the real Bucky comes through once more.

He’s sitting in a house, laughing and singing along. A happy warmth fills his blood. That was a wonderful memory. He felt… safe. He felt loved. Finally, he sees the girl he was with again. And she’s standing right in front of him.

His blue eyes look over her again. Like he’s discovering her for the first time again. “Y/N?” He whimpers. He seems shocked and confused, as if his true identity, his humanity, coming back was merely a switch being flicked. She smiles, a huge, wide smile as bright as the sun. And this time, Bucky recognises it.

“Hey Bucky.” He glances down at his hands, dropping his weapon to the floor immediately. 

“W-What happened? Why am I holding a gun? D-Did I hurt you?” He panics, looking around wildly for any injuries.

“No, it’s okay. Shh. I’m here.” She soothes, clasping his hands tightly in the hopes they stop shaking. “And I’m okay.” Bucky breathes a sigh of relief. Then he smiles, chuckling softly.

“Y/N… It’s so good to see-” But suddenly, he groans softly, his eyelids fluttering shut. 

“Bucky?” she gasps, trying to hold on to the super soldier’s body as he begins to slump forward. The weight of his body almost knocks her over, but she keeps a grasp on him as tightly as she can. “What’s going on? Talk to me.” And once more, he’s silent. “Bucky!”

Sometime later, Bucky awakens, wincing at the bright light suddenly flooding the room. He groans, and his head pounds. 

“He’s waking up.” Immediately, he’s on edge, expecting to see another HYDRA agent in front of him. Yet, thankfully, he recognises the voice. It’s Sam. Although, despite that, Bucky knows he can’t be too careful. This could be a trap to lure him into a false sense of security. It’s only when Steve and Sam step in front of him that Bucky slowly starts to relax. He tries to get up, but realises that something is pinning his metal arm down, preventing him from using it. 

“Sorry. We had to be sure you were fully immobile.” Steve informs him. With a sigh, Bucky nods. They’re right, it is the best thing to do, especially when he’s still so unpredictable. But he’d be lying if he didn’t say that the fact that even his closest friends don’t feel safe around him didn’t hurt him deeply.

“W-What happened?” He frowns. He tries to find the memory, but like most of his memories, there’s just an empty space. 

“We were hoping you could tell us that.” Bucky wracks his brain, looking for something, anything, to help.

“All I remember is we were trying to escape, but I got separated. I tried to get back to Y/N, but I got lost. And then, out of nowhere, these agents surrounded me.” The insignia on their uniforms jumps out at him, as clear as day. A final, sick reminder. “It was HYDRA.” 

Suddenly, memories come flooding back. Not of HYDRA, though, or of Steve and Sam. Of Y/N. And he realises that she’s nowhere to be seen. His stomach drops, and he begins to panic once more. “Y/N! Where is she? Is she okay? Oh god, don’t tell me I’ve… please don’t tell me she's ....”

“Y/N’s fine.” Steve reassures him. “She’s resting.” And Bucky breathes the heaviest sigh of relief he swears he ever has before.

“Resting? From what? What happened?” Steve and Sam look between each other, and Bucky raises a brow. The longer they go without saying anything, the more worried he feels.

“You’re right. It was HYDRA who found you. We’re not entirely sure what happened, but they must have reactivated you and sent you out to stop us while they escaped.”

“Oh god.” He sighs, burying his face in his one free hand. “How bad was it?”

“Well, you definitely tried to stop us.” Sam begins, and from his tone, Bucky senses he shouldn’t press him on that any further. Guilt floods through him, and he groans. 

“I’m sorry, I-”

“It’s okay Buck.”

“No, it’s not. You two don’t have any idea what it’s like to be responsible for so much pain and carnage, but not even be aware of it. To have to question yourself every time you wake up, wondering what you did in the night. If you really were sleeping, or if you were out there, killing innocent people. You’ve never stared at yourself in the mirror and wondered about the true scale of what you’ve done, and how you can ever repent for it. And you haven’t had to worry about the people who did this to you finding you and doing it all over again, like today.” He snaps. When he sees their shocked faces staring back at him, he sighs. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that.”

“It’s okay Buck. All things considered, it wasn’t too bad, actually. Surface wounds at most.” Steve replies. Another small sigh of relief sounds from Bucky. That’s good. Not great, but good. They can work with this. Hopefully.

“Thank god. And thank you for bringing me back.” He sighs.

“Oh, that wasn’t us.” Sam informs him. The pair step aside, and Y/N steps forward.

“Bucky!” She smiles, immediately rushing over to him..

“Y/N. I’m so sorry.” He gasps, his voice full of sorrow. Will she ever be able to look at him again? Or will she always see him trying to kill them? He tried so hard to show her he’s not a monster, and this has just undone everything. Y/N kneels down in front of him until she’s eye level with him. Her eyes are so beautiful. How did he never notice that before? His only choice is to hope and pray that she’ll forgive him, and that she’ll ever be able to trust him again. A strand of Bucky’s hair falls down into his face, and Y/N reaches out and tucks it behind his ear. 

“What are you saying sorry for?” She whispers. Bucky scoffs, shaking his head. There’s no way she can be this kind and forgiving. Especially after that.

“I tried to kill you.” She shakes her head. 

“But you didn’t, remember? Just like before, you stopped yourself, and you came back.”

“Because of you. You’re amazing, Y/N. I don’t deserve you. I deserve to be alone. It’s not safe to be with me.” She cups his cheek, gazing into his eyes. And Bucky feels a warmth growing in his stomach once more. 

“Well, that’s tough, because I’m not going anywhere.” She insists. “I know it wasn’t your choice, Bucky. It was HYDRA’s.”

“And what if they come back? They’re still out there, and the last thing I want is to-”

“Then we’ll be ready for them.” She finds his hand, squeezing it tightly. He feels so comforted by her grasp, so safe. He stares back at her, his heart pounding. No matter how hard he tries to convince her to leave, he knows she’s not going to listen. She’s stubborn as all hell, and she definitely isn’t going to give up anytime soon. But it’s so wonderful to have someone care about you so much that when they stare into the depths of hell with you, instead of running, they refuse to leave your side.

“You’re incredible.” He gasps, not even thinking. A light pink dusts his cheeks, and Y/N smiles, giggling a little.

“Besides,” She continues. “You promised me we’d be back in my grandma’s house, remember?” That feels so long ago, an entire lifetime ago. Bucky doesn’t even know if he’ll make it to tomorrow, let alone till then. But as he watches Y/N beaming over at him, and realises just how much he loves her, he knows he has to keep his promise to her. And he'll do his best to make it happen, no matter how long it takes.

In the aftermath of the attack, Y/N and Bucky are soon called into multiple meetings to find out how this could’ve happened, why it happened, and how to stop it from ever happening again. And Y/N hates every minute of them, especially how she has to see Bucky’s face as he has to relive his trauma over and over with every question they ask him, and how they keep prodding him for answers he clearly cannot remember enough to give. When they ask him if he had any knowledge of what HYDRA was planning, or if he had helped them do it, Y/N swears she could’ve thrown the table across the room in anger. Thankfully, they both have Steve and Sam in their corner defending them, and Fury and Maria help in their own… ‘special’ way. 

When it is all finally over, the small matter of where Bucky should stay comes into question. Although the HQ looked alright from the outside, the attack raised so many questions on allegiances and safety that Bucky can no longer stay there. Neither Y/N nor Bucky wanted to ask if it was because they still thought he was responsible.

Thankfully, everyone in charge somehow seems to agree that the best place for Bucky wasn’t in a cell in Avengers HQ, but with Y/N in her safe apartment. Of course, Y/N is more happy to have him stay with her, but she’s confused why she was chosen first. Maybe they noticed the way she looks at him, and how hopelessly in love with him she is. But in all honesty, she doesn’t care about their reasoning. She’s just so thrilled to have Bucky back that she’s going to take every chance she can to be close to him after he’s been locked away for so long. 

And the idea of living together with Bucky again is great. They're used to being together, just the two of them, and immediately felt happy to be going back to it. However, that happiness is very quickly shattered when the pair realise that SHIELD and the Avengers don’t exactly pride their safe houses on comfort or size. Or on having more than one occupant. And that means there’s only one available bed for them. Immediately, Bucky offers to take the couch. Both to be a gentleman, and because deep down, he’s still terrified that he’d scared her away from him for good.

“Bucky, I’m not letting you sleep on the couch. Especially not after all this.” Y/N insists, ignoring his attempts to argue that he was fine, and that he’s used to this sort of thing. In return, her insistence that she would sleep on the couch caused just as many protests from him. After some deliberation, the pair eventually decide their only choice is to share the bed.

“I’ll um. I’ll just stay over here, okay? I just want you to be comfortable.” Bucky murmurs, scooting as far as he can to the edge of the bed without the risk of falling out. He sees a flash of disappointment across her face as she sees him trying to get as far away from her as possible, and his stomach twists with guilt. He hates being so far from her, but he still can’t trust himself around her yet, and this is the best way to ensure her safety.

When he wakes up in the middle of the night with another nightmare, screaming and thrashing to thwart the HYDRA agents he’s sure are coming for them both, Y/N is right by his side, wrapping her arms around his crying, shaking frame. Just like before, she stays by his side, whispering reassuring words into his ear and staying awake with him until he calms down enough to try to get some sleep. “Thank you.” He whispers into the darkness.

“Of course.” Her voice replies. 

The next morning, she wakes up in his arms. And for the first time in a long time, Y/N finally feels safe. In his sleep, Bucky reflexively tightens his grasp on her, pulling her closer. Whether for her safety or his own comfort, she doesn’t know. But she loves it all the same. Being here, in Bucky’s arms, just the two of them, is perfect. Everything finally feels right. She looks up at him, his lips parted slightly as he softly snores. He looks so at peace, finally free after god knows how long. His hair falls in his face again, and it takes everything in her to not reach up and tuck it behind his ear once more. Despite how much she wants to be closer to him now, Bucky deserves this rest, and she won’t ruin it for him. 

And besides, looking isn’t so bad, right?

As they’re both under strict orders to stay where they are until the investigation is over, Y/N and Bucky have plenty of free time to do whatever they want. And Y/N takes it as her opportunity to show Bucky some more of the things he’s missed over the years, like her favourite movies and books. She also makes sure to give Bucky the care he deserves. One night, when he feels comfortable enough, she runs him a bath and washes his hair for him, gently massaging the shampoo and conditioner into his scalp. Although Bucky flinches at her touch a few times, he soon feels safe and comfortable enough to relax. And besides, he knows Y/N could never hurt him. Even after everything he’s done, she’s stayed by his side and fought for him when it seemed like nobody else would. 

Honestly, Bucky thinks he could thank her every minute of every day for the rest of her life, and it still wouldn’t be enough appreciation. As she gently rinses his hair, he glances over at her. And the familiar feeling of butterflies in his stomach starts all over again. She’s so beautiful. So caring. Even if he never tells her how he feels, that whenever she laughs, his heart grows three sizes bigger, and that he thinks she is the most beautiful woman he has ever seen, even when she thinks she looks like a mess after waking up… he’s so grateful that he got to know her, and be cared for by her. 

“That’s you all done, Bucky.” Y/N smiles. “Do you need anything else?” Bucky almost laughs at that. Because what else could she do for him? She’s done so much already. Too much, some would argue. 

“No, thanks.” He smiles back, just as bright as Y/N’s. He wonders if she ever notices how he only seems to smile around her… or at least, even more than he does when he’s with Steve and Sam. Little does Bucky know, however, that Y/N has noticed. And every time she remembers it, it sends her heart into a spiral all over again.

“Okay. I’ll leave you in peace then.” As she gets up to leave, Bucky almost stops her, not ready to stop this moment just yet. But then he remembers where they are. How the hell is he going to explain why he wants her to stay to watch him getting out of a bathtub? Even though she’s just washed his hair for him, she’s never seen him like this before. So… undressed. It feels too intimate, too different for them both.

So he lets her go. As the door clicks shut behind her, Bucky sighs, leaning his head against the cool tiles. He can’t keep going on like this, of having his chest tighten every time he sees her, or have his heart beat faster and faster whenever she smiles. He has to tell her. He’s just too damn terrified.

Later that night, Y/N and Bucky sit together listening to music, like they do most nights. Somehow, though, tonight is different. There’s a different atmosphere in the air surrounding them, one neither is willing to mention. Because once that’s broken, and their feelings are out in the open… It changes everything. And despite the hell they’ve both been through, somehow admitting their feelings for each other is the scariest thing either of them could imagine. There are no take backs, no do overs. Once it’s done, that’s it.

“How’s your neck, by the way?” Bucky asks, gesturing to the bandage on it. A cruel reminder of the last few days.

“It’s, um, good.” She nods. “They said it won’t scar or anything, thank god.”

“That’s great then.” Y/N nods again, curtly. She’s never felt so strange around Bucky, even when they first met. Say something. Anything. 

“Do you wanna dance with me?” She asks, her voice coming out so quickly that Bucky has to ask her to repeat herself. God, this is torture. Thankfully though, Bucky says yes, and pulls her up. Y/N presses shuffle on her phone, and soon the all too familiar guitar intro to Take Me Dancing by The Maine begins to play. Immediately, Y/N’s cheeks burn. “Oh god, I’m sorry, this is a slow song. I-I can change it.” She stammers, hating herself for being so obviously flustered.

“No, please don’t.” Bucky chuckles. “It’s been a while, but I was a pretty keen dancer back in the 40s. I could use a refresher.” He holds out his hand, scarred and bruised. “May I?” Y/N slips her hand into his, interlinking her fingers with his and gently running hers along his bruises. But he can see no judgement or fear in her gaze. She looks at him with the same comfort as she always has. Y/N moves his hand to her waist and takes her other hand in his.

The apartment wasn’t exactly made for slow dancing, but honestly, Y/N doesn’t care where they are. Because wherever she and Bucky are… that’s home. Bucky twirls her under his arm, holding her close as he sways her to the music. He really is a wonderful dancer. He definitely kept his skills from the 40s. She used to wonder what it’d have been like to know him then, and how different it would have been from their life now. Obviously, there’d be a lot less fear and violence, but honestly, she doesn’t care about that anymore. She’s so in love with Bucky that she’ll always take him as he is. 

“Give me thunder, give me lightning, And I will give you every part of me.”

As John O’Callaghan’s voice fills the room, Y/N almost finds herself laughing at the lyrics. In a way, it’s a perfect representation of her life with Bucky. He was the storm that blew into her life, destroying everything she once knew. And for a moment, she was terrified he’d destroy her too. But now, they’re slow dancing together, finally safe. And she’s head over heels in love with him. Bucky steps closer to her without even thinking, pulling her even closer to his chest as his grasp tightens on her. 

Even as the music fades out, Bucky keeps a hold on her, gently swaying her to their own rhythm. The warmth radiating from his body envelops them both, and she can hear his heartbeat through his chest.

“You know.” He murmurs, his stubble lightly grazing her cheek. “I don’t think I ever properly thanked you for what you did for me. What you continue to do for me.”

“You don’t have to thank me, Buck. You never did.” 

“I do.” He disagrees. “I really do. You saved me, showed me what more there is to life. You may have given me my old life back, but you’ve given me something wonderful and new, too. Hope.” He looks at her properly now, light blue eyes staring into her soul. “And I can’t thank you enough for it. You’re a real angel, you know that?” She can see tears building in his eyes, and no doubt she’s close to tears, too. Her heart swells, and she smiles.

“You’re welcome, Bucky. But I wouldn’t say I’m an angel. I just saw you needed help, and I gave you it. Anyone else would.” Bucky blinks in surprise, unable to believe how this wonderful, beautiful person is undermining herself so much, especially when he owes his life to her. But he’ll tell her how special she is for the rest of his life.

“'Anyone else', is not you, Y/N.” He whispers, his breath hot against her cheek and sending a shiver down her spine. “And you are an angel to me.” Sniffling, Y/N nods.

“Thank you Bucky. I wish it could be like this all the time, just me and you, together.” She sighs.

“Me too.” Her eyes flicker to his lips. So pink. So soft. Have they always been so pink? God, it’s like I’m noticing him for the first time all over again.

“Y/N?”

“Mhm?”

“I have something I need to tell you.” Bucky takes a deep breath. “I’m in love with you.” Despite how often her heart beat increases around Bucky, in that moment Y/N swears she feels it stop. For a moment she thinks she misheard him, but when he continues, saying: “I don’t know when, o-or how it happened. But god, Y/N, I’m tired of pretending. I love you so much. And I want you to know it.” She’s too stunned to reply, and Bucky’s heart sinks, thinking she doesn't feel the same. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said that, I-”

But a comforting hand on his forearm stops him. One he knows all too well. “Bucky.” Y/N smiles softly, tears already running down her cheeks. “I love you too.”

“You do?” He gasps. Gingerly, he raises his metal hand, wordlessly asking her if it’s okay to continue, and Y/N nods. Bucky cups her cheek with his metal hand, cool against her skin. He never thought something responsible for so much death and pain could hold something so beautiful. “Can I kiss you?” When she nods again, Bucky gently leans in close, pressing his lips to hers. The kiss is firm, yet soft. It’s nothing like Y/N has ever experienced before. She pulls him closer, deepening the kiss. When they pull apart, Bucky’s cheeks are a soft pink, and he chuckles, no doubt trying to maintain his cool facade from the 40s, but completely failing. He gazes back at her, unable to stop smiling. “That was… perfect.” Y/N leans in, pecking his cheek.

“You’re perfect.” She whispers.

“Are you trying to get me to kiss you again?” He raises a brow, yet still can’t keep the grin off of his face. “Because it’s working.” And then he pulls her close once more.

“It’s not going to be for too long…. I hope.” Bucky reassures Y/N, squeezing her hand. Yet, as she glances over at him, she can tell he’s trying to put on a brave face himself. A few weeks after she and Bucky admitted their love for one another, King T’Challa, The King of Wakanda, and an ally of Steve and Sam’s, heard of Bucky’s plight and offered to take him in and use their technology to help him break free from HYDRA’s programming. Obviously, they both jumped at the chance. And now, the day that Bucky’s going to leave has finally come. 

Y/N knows this is the best place for Bucky to be, and she’s incredibly glad that he finally gets the chance to heal, and grateful to T’Challa for giving him this chance. But the fact that Bucky’s leaving her is tearing her up inside. Thankfully, T’Challa was incredibly kind and understanding, telling her she can visit him whenever she wants, and that she can even stay there with him for a while if she wanted to.

And whilst she wants that more than anything, Y/N said no. At least, for the first little while. She loves Bucky more than anything in the world, and because of that, she wants to give him the best chance to heal. And to her, that means stepping back and letting him take as long as he needs to process this on his own. That doesn’t mean she’s going to completely stop talking to him, though. She’s going back to her grandma’s house for a week or two to assess the damage and deal with things there, and then she, Steve and Sam are going to Wakanda to visit him. She sighs, looking at Bucky. 

Yet it still feels like she’s never going to see him again. Bucky pulls her into a hug, as if he senses her nerves. “I’ll see you soon, alright? And like T’Challa said, I’m sure we’ll be able to keep in contact somehow.”

“I know.” She manages a smile. “Just don’t forget about me, alright?” Bucky chuckles, giving her a quick, yet passionate kiss.

“Like I ever could.” They stay like that, in each other’s arms for a while, until T’Challa approaches them both.

“It’s time.” He smiles. 

“Well, this is it.” Bucky chuckles, but she can see the tears shimmering in his eyes. Y/N surges forward, grabbing him and squeezing tightly. 

“I love you.” She whimpers, and Bucky sniffles.

“I love you too.” 

And with one last kiss, he’s gone.

Y/N makes the trip back to her grandma’s house in silence. Steve and Sam offered to go with her in case any rogue HYDRA agents were there, but she declined, still too emotional from saying goodbye to Bucky to even think about saying goodbye to them, even if it is just for a few weeks. The time she spent with them was so fast-paced and frightening, and it’s hard to believe it’s over, and how things are changing between them all. 

The house still looks just as imposing as it did before, and the front steps still creak as she goes up them, advancing towards the front door. Her hands brush against the doorknob, and she braces herself for what she’s about to find. The memory of the last time she was here enters her mind once more, and Y/N sighs. If only she knew what awaited her the last time she opened that front door, maybe she wouldn’t have opened it. But deep down, she knows that if Bucky would’ve been there on the other side, she’d do it all again in a heartbeat.

Strangely, the house seems more or less the same since they left, only a few things out of place here and there, presumably caused by the wind blowing through the window Bucky broke. It’s like nobody has been there at all. Despite her footsteps around the house, it’s eerily quiet. Last time, she sensed Bucky’s presence, and knew she wasn’t alone. Now though, she can't feel a thing. Not even a ghost.

Every time she enters a room, a part of her expects to see Bucky sitting there, waiting for her. Like he was the last time she came here. And every time she realises he’s not there, it breaks her heart all over again. Finally, after she’s checked every room, the reality that everyone is really gone hits her, and she breaks down in tears.

She’s never felt so alone.

This is NOT the end of this story! There's still going to be an epilogue (that may turn into a final chapter depending on how long it is). They will get their happy ending, I promise!

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[prettyrealm]

ateez san reputation reading

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female idols:

they see him as someone honorable and friendly, they think he’s smart and he may offer up good career advice or tips (most likely unprovoked) & have the impression that he’s always willing to help out (without ulterior motives, they feel he’s genuine even if his advice can be unsolicited at times), they make view him as quite serious, some may see him as very loving or as an ideal partner and want to date him - maybe even projecting romantic fantasies onto him, they gossip about it him quite a bit, they may see him as more modest and humble than other men in the industry and think that he has his head on straight (he could come off as more serious and career-oriented than most - they probably don’t see him at too many social events outside of work and in turn view him as less rowdy or fuckboy-ish), they see him as super devoted and dedicated to whatever he believes in and believes he wants to empower others, but at the same time, they may think he’s elitist about this (only helps those he deems worthy) or that he only acts this way for praise, or that he can be too one track minded in this sense. they definitely see him as different and not the type to conform or fall victim to peer pressure, they think he’s practical in his approach to things, they don’t think he’s going to change any time soon & may think he has more self respect than other men in the industry.

male idols:

some may think he’s flaky or hard to get in contact with (it’s like he’s like “yeah we’ll hang out friday… or next friday.. or next next friday” and then it becomes weeks of them just never linking up), they think he may have funny reactions to things, they think he’s emotional, some may think he has anxiety or is on the verge of some kind of breakdown (or he has had one that they know about), they think he’s really stuck in the past and or is really upset about something he lost and focuses on this a lot, they think he was much happier back then and that something happened that dimmed his light - an obvious shift in personality or behavior, they think he moves too fast and isn’t living in the moment (like he wants to fast forward life), maybe he talks about moving on and growing past things to the point where it sounds like coping and they just know he’s actively going through something, they think he’s disciplined and not the type to self sabotage, they think he flirts with people a lot, they think he likes to mentor people and share his knowledge (helpful to other idols behind the scenes), but at the same time, they may think he likes to keep people indebted to him in this way or only does this with the assumption that they’ll have his back or like him more.

staff:

motivated and goal-oriented, they think he’s gone through something bad and is still working through it, they see him as someone who had has learned a lot of life lessons in his idol career, which in turn has made him colder, but more realistic about the industry he’s navigating, they think he can be emotional & moody or temperamental (they think he can have extreme feelings that quickly go from high to low), they think he’s a slave to a certain mindset or code that doesn’t allow him to truly make his own choices & that it has made him obsessed with living his life a certain way, they think he doesn’t really do what he wants and isn’t truly thinking as freely as he may claims to, (i don’t think this is his company controlling him or anything, it’s like something or someone got into his head, maybe a motivational speaker that he looks up to or self-help/motivation books. idk exactly what but it’s along those lines), they see him as someone with a lot of willpower and determination who will have a prosperous future because of it, they think he can be a bit wishy washy and not loyal, they think that he may judge people harshly and only help those who he deems worthy but even with this, they think that he is a good mentor to other idols because he knows how to do his job well.

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