#'correct and based and cool and stunning and correct and being the only person i respect' grian at mumbo sorry

[weaselishmcdiesel]

"Sorry for always making everything about grumbo" never apologize for being correct and based and cool and stunning and correct and being the only person I respect

this is legitimately the affirmation i needed thank you anon asjkdhfs

#'correct and based and cool and stunning and correct and being the only person i respect' grian at mumbo sorry #ahehehehe #weasel speaks #asks! #hc #hermitshipping #sorta #fuck i really dont want to keep maintagging hermitshipping like that #but i want for it to be blocked for those who dont want to see it OTL

[jamespotterthefirst]

You & I (3/3)

Book: Open Heart, beyond Pairing: Dr. Ethan Ramsey x F!MC (Dr. Lilac Allende-Ramsey) Word count: 1.7K Rating/ Warning: Teen/ Language

Series: You & I | Part 1 | Part 2

Premise: Her husband’s colleague seems a bit too interested in him. Things take a turn for the worse when she finds her in his hotel room during a work trip.

Note: Thank you so much to everyone who read and supported Part 1 & 2! This is based on a really old anon who asked: “has anyone every come between Ethan and Lilac?”

The two women looked at one another in stunned silence. The seconds stretched into eternities until Heather recovered first, schooling her pretty face into an unreadable mask.

“Dr. Allende.”

“Dr. Allende-Ramsey.”

The correction went ignored.

“I didn't realize you had been invited to the conference,” Heather said in a casual voice, as though she wasn't standing in a married man's hotel room semi-naked. “I thought only the most senior physicians at any given hospital got to attend.”

Lilac, for her part, barely caught the jabbing words with the deafening pitch ringing in her ears. Pulse pounding against her ribcage at an alarming speed, she urged her senses to focus.

“What are you doing in my husband's room?”

Her voice was surprisingly cool and collected.

“The hotel mixed up our reservations. They accidentally put us in the same room.”

Lilac almost laughed in her face at the feeble excuse.

“Bullshit,” she returned.

“It happens more often than you’d think. You would know.”

Heather's eyes sunk into Lilac's, sharp with implied meaning. With an icy twist of her stomach, she caught on. Somehow, Heather was referencing Miami and the mishap that had forced her, Lilac, to share a room with Ethan.

Lilac's legs were shaking at this point, but she held herself with dignity. “You can drop the act. The hotel got a request to accommodate an extra person. That was you, wasn't it?”

The blonde's face remained unreadable.

“What are you suggesting, Dr. Allende? That I willingly wanted to room with a married man?”

“Yes.”

From her peripheral vision, she saw someone approaching them. It wasn't until the figure was a few feet away that Lilac recognized it as her sister.

“I forgot to pack perfume! You think you could—” Laurel stopped dead, eyes falling on Heather. Surprise melted into confusion which finally gave way to anger. “What the fuck?”

Lilac ignored this, eyes boring into Heather.

“Tell me, did you pretend to be me when you changed the reservation? His wife? Because that must've been humiliating.”

“You have no idea what you're talking about.”

“Really? You think I don't see the way you look at my husband? And all your petty little jabs at me? Which I'm not even upset over, by the way. You can hate me and insult me all you want, but the minute you disrespect my husband's privacy like this, then we have a problem.”

“You're being a paranoid b—”

“Finish the sentence,” Laurel challenged, filling the space between Lilac and Heather. “I fucking dare you.”

Heather's composed features flickered slightly when she stared down at the feisty brunette. Anyone with working brain cells would see that Laurel meant business when it came to defending her sister. And Heather, it appeared, was a smart woman. She backed a few steps, pressing her mouth shut despite looking as though she wanted to say more.

Lilac, meanwhile, remained stoic and composed behind her sister. Her eyes sunk into Heather, as though she was a puzzle that had been too easy to decipher up until the last, missing piece.

“What were you hoping for, exactly? An affair?” she asked, her voice cool and level.

Heather's eyes moved from Laurel back up at Lilac. Instantly, her pretty features lit up with amusement. And Lilac could see the exact moment all pretense crumbled.

“That's not uncommon for a man like Ethan.” The blonde replied with surprising confidence. “Powerful men like him have many affairs and no one bats an eye. I wouldn't be the first nor the last. You're naïve if you think otherwise.”

Laurel scoffed, outraged. She advanced, ready to pounce but Lilac stopped her with a hand to her shoulder.

“I'm sorry you don't trust anyone in your life unconditionally,” Lilac started, “but my husband would never be unfaithful.”

The blonde laughed derisively but Lilac ignored her.

“And I think you know that, too. Otherwise, you wouldn't have snuck into his bedroom.”

“Pathetic,” Laurel spat.

Heather spluttered, aware that the sisters were right. For the first time since she opened the door, she looked embarrassed. The sheer humiliation of this fact made her angrier.

“It's just sex!” she shrieked. “You two act like I wanted him divorced and remarried by next week.”

“Listen to yourself,” Lilac returned quietly. “Do you have any self respect?”

“Ha! Don't talk to me about self respect when everyone knows how you snatched him up. Sleeping with your boss? That's not any better.”

This time, Laurel closed the small gap and went straight for Heather's damp hair. Both women screeched, one in rage and the other in surprise. Lilac, for her part, pulled her sister back, doing a commendable job of restraining her.

“Laurel, no!”

“You're lucky I don't press charges!” Heather bellowed, disheveled and on the verge of tears.

Laurel opened her mouth to reply but another voice intervened.

“Lilac?”

It was the deep, rich voice of her husband, strained with surprise. His blue eyes moved over the scene, expression tensing with increasing shock as he took it all in. Finally, his gaze fell on a sobbing Heather and then immediately darted to Lilac.

The shocked, tense silence was only broken as another figure joined the fray. A breathless Tobias came to a stop beside Ethan, looking equally as surprised by the chaos before him.

“Baby?” Tobias said, spotting Laurel. “What's going on here?”

“This little homewrecker here snuck into Ethan's hotel room hoping he'd fuck her.” Laurel replied, no longer fighting against her sister's restraints.

Ethan flinched at the last few words. The shock on his handsome face had diminished to its usual neutrality, but Lilac could see the gears of his mind working. It was as though he was trying to solve a complicated case without having all the facts yet. Once again, his piercing blue eyes rested on Lilac, as though asking her for an explanation.

“Heather, what the fuck?” Tobias asked, shell-shocked.

The blonde's response was more uncontrollable sobbing. As both men surpassed the initial shock and regained their senses, the hallway erupted with noise.

So much noise.

Questions, accusations, and more sobbing— all of it echoed in Lilac's ears, drilling into her skull, pinching every last nerve. Someone said her name but it sounded distant. Someone else threw a jacket over Heather’s shoulders. Laurel cried out in indignation.

It was all too much. Lilac’s head throbbed, threatening to explode…

And then her feet were carrying her away.

“Lilac!”

Several voices called her name but she didn't stop until a gust of fresh air hit her face like a welcomed caress. The blare of New York City echoed from somewhere below the canopy of the purple sky. Despite the faint bustle, she found an odd sense of peace in the abandoned hotel rooftop. Her eyes roamed over the spectacular skyline, taking in the glistening lights that appeared as the last rays of the sun sank behind the horizon. Peace settled over her, easing her body from the stress of the day’s events.

She wasn't sure how long she stood there.

The creaking of the door behind her, followed by a set of footsteps, broke her out of her lull. Seconds later, someone settled next to her. She didn't have to look up to know who it was.

“I had a feeling you'd be up here,” Ethan commented softly.

She didn’t reply. The soft fabric of his jacket swept her skip and he draped it over her shoulders. His scent enveloped her, bringing more warmth to her body than any coat ever could.

“I just got off the phone with the HR department at Mass Kenmore. I explained what happened with Heather today. They'll be opening an investigation.”

Without tearing her eyes from the horizon, she nodded. The sun was fully gone by now, casting the city into an inky blue haze.

“I hope something comes of it,” Lilac said at last. “What she did today was unacceptable.”

More silence followed. As the night breeze picked up, she stole a sideways glance at her husband. He, too, watched the glittering skyline, his jaw tight. He looked almost serene, but she knew him better.

“I'm sorry about all of this, Lilac,” he said quietly, finally looking at her. He opened his mouth to say more but she shook her head.

“There's nothing for you to be sorry about.”

“I should've listened to you,” he pressed on. “You told me your hunch before I boarded and I ignored it.”

“Even if you did take my word for it, there was no way for you to know she'd do this.”

“I know that, love,” he assured her. “I should've still listened.”

Tentatively, he closed the miniscule distance separating them. Even more gently, his hands fell at her sides, his blue eyes carried hesitation, as though he was afraid she’d pull away. When Lilac’s hand moved up to sweep his cheek, he closed his eyes against her touch, relaxing with relief. They stood like that, basking in the peaceful silence for a few minutes.

“What happened to Heather?” she asked after a while.

“Hotel security escorted her to her room. She is to leave the premises tomorrow morning. It's lucky for her since it places distance between her and your sister.”

That made her smile, but only briefly. Ethan was watching her with a quiet, pensive look.

“Did you ever doubt me?”

“Never. Not for a second, Ethan.”

He nodded once.

“Good,” he said before bringing her hand to his lips. “There will never be anyone but you, Lilac.”

The words made her feel weightless. Unaware of the way her heart stammered for him, he leaned in and kissed her softly. It was a short and gentle kiss, a perfect summary of their sweet moment on that rooftop.

A biting breeze made her shiver. Wordlessly, Ethan readjusted his coat on her shoulders. Then, his arms pulled her close for good measure.

“Ready to go inside? The hotel manager was so embarrassed about changing the reservation for Heather that he upgraded us to a suite.”

“That sounds heavenly,” she sighed, finally realizing just how exhausted she truly was. “Can we also get dinner? Your baby wants food.”

An incandescent smile was her reward at the mention of their child. His hands moved from her sides to the barely visible bump of her stomach.

“I meant me,” she joked with a laugh.

Ethan rolled his eyes but chuckled softly.

“How does room service sound? I don’t know about you but I don’t want to be around people.”

“Even better. Just you and I.”

He lifted her hand to his lips again, pressing the softest of kisses there.

“As it should be.”

Note: As I was getting ready to post this, YT Music decided to play:

It could’ve been because I’m playing a Harry Styles radio station but I’m going to interpret it as serendipity!

In all seriousness, I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart if you read three parts. Your support means the world to me! I really hope you liked this mini-series.

I will be back soon with more mini-series, YBF, and one-shots this summer! Love you all,

Bree 

#open heart #ethan ramsey #ethan x mc #playchoices

[dameronology]

you have my number {bucky barnes x reader}

summary: bucky barnes' memory is a little selective, thanks to all the brainwashing - but one thing he'll never forget is his love for you, even if you're a complete & utter pain in the ass. his ass. (based on deja vu by olivia rodigro)

^even tho this fic refers to bucky as having a new gf, the reader is still g.n :)

this is spoiler free! enjoyyy

- jazz xx

Your relationship with Bucky Barnes had been nothing short of a train wreck.

And frankly, that was putting it nicely.

It had been a short & passionate affair; intense and sweet and filled with so much emotion in such high concentrations that you'd both almost drowned in it. For every euphoric moment, there had been one so low that you'd scraped your knees on the ground. Climbing a ladder to heaven whilst simultaneously digging your own graves had taken its toll on you both, and eventually, you had no choice but to go your separate ways. It had been for your own sanity, really.

So there he was, tucked away in a neat little box in your brain, labelled don't touch, ever. Even when you were completely wasted, surrounded by your friends and their respective lovers, you never dared to venture back down that particular memory lane. Forgetting all the bad parts and selectively remembering the good parts was easy enough to do, but you had the common sense to remember why you'd broken up in the first place. Because Bucky Barnes, despite being easy on the eyes and having a charming sense of humour, was a pain in your fucking ass. He managed to press every one of your buttons without even trying and his ability to bring out the best in you was completely and entirely wiped out by his tendency to bring out the worst. That wasn't even getting started on his emotional hold-ups; a can of worms neither of you had dared to open until it became the very reason for your demise.

Six months had passed, and you'd managed to expertly avoid him. You worked different missions and Sam Wilson, god bless his sweet soul, went the extra mile to ensure your paths never crossed in a professional sense. On a personal level, however? That was a little more difficult. New York City felt a lot smaller after your break up. You found yourself occasionally ducking under your hood when you saw him on the F-train, or rushing to cross the road when you saw him coming towards you on the street.

That was when you had the whole city to lose yourself in; streets and shops and little food carts to distract yourself with should you need to. Being confined to the same room for a work party was a different story entirely, and one you didn't want to read. Yet, thanks to some insistence from your boss and a little grovelling from your colleagues, you found yourself rocking up to the former Avengers tower on a Friday night.

"So you do exist outside of your work uniform?" Sam Wilson greeted you with a quirked eyebrow.

"Yeah, yeah - nice to see you too, Wilson."

Despite your initial attempts to elbow him in the rips, he wrestled you off of him and pulled you into a tight hug. Sam was one of your favourite colleagues and oldest friends - he'd witnessed the rise and fall of your relationship with Bucky, and been there for you both during the break-up. That had been an exhausting few days, running between your respective apartments in an attempt to offer emotional support to you both.

"D'you want some champagne?" He asked.

"I'm good, but thank-"

You froze, eyes widening at the sight of James Barnes across the room. He looked quintessentially the same, bar for the fact his hair was a little longer and he had a fresh, pink scar under his left eye. Having ditched his usual attire for a black blazer, he looked good. Annoyingly so, in fact. It made you secretly grateful that you'd chosen to dress up a little more than usual too.

"- on second thoughts." You took the flute of champagne from Sam, also grabbing a shot of vodka from the same trey. It was gone in seconds.

"Need I ask?" Sam gave you a playful frown. His brown eyes followed your gaze over his shoulder, landing on the man you'd been staring at. "Ah. I need not."

"Sorry." You murmured. "We haven't actually spoken since, y'know."

"Since you had a break-up that made Ross and Rachel look good?"

"I don't think Bucky has ever seen Friends." You quipped.

"His loss." Sam shrugged. "You should talk to him."

"Nope." You snorted. "Absolutely not. I don't even know if he's moved on."

"Judging by the pretty blonde on his arm, I think he has," Sam replied. "Would you look at that! They're headed right for us."

That was a lot of information to process at once. You would have needed a week alone for your poor, tired brain to deal with the fact that Bucky had someone else on his arm, and a further three days to big yourself up enough to talk to him. Alas, that was not the case tonight. Instead, you had about five seconds between Sam finishing his sentence and your ex-boyfriend reaching you. It was just as well you found the energy within that timeframe to down your champagne.

You could see the woman on his arm clearer now. To give credit where credit was due, she stunning. She looked like the sort of girl who smelt of strawberries and Chanel, and grew her own vegetables on the fire escape. The kind of person you swore to be with every New Year that came, but quickly ditched after a week, returning to drinking coffee from the Starbucks under your apartment rather than going to the organic, vegan place a few blocks over. There was an ethereal glow about her and fuck. You were mad.

"Sam!" Bucky called out to his friend - for a minute, you thought he was ignoring you, before you realised he genuinely didn't recognise you. Your name rolled off his tongue with a tone of uncertainty, as though he was learning a new language and still learning how to pronounce things. "Wow. You look...different."

"So do you." You shot back. "Who's your friend?"

"This is Katie." He awkwardly smiled. "My...my girlfriend."

"It's nice to meet you." You forced an equally pained grin, taking her hand in a shake.

"How do you and Bucky know each other?" She asked.

"Work." Bucky quickly said. You thinned your eyes at him, almost in disbelief.

"So you're an Avenger like these two?" Katie asked, clearly not picking up on the tension. "That's so cool."

"Not in an official capacity." You replied. "But they'd be fucked without me."

--

The night only got longer from there, really.

There wasn't enough champagne in the world to help the void in your soul. It was a gaping wound that Bucky Barnes had both filled and widened - and tonight, he was doing the latter. It sounded as though him and Katie were having a grand ol' time of it. From the parts of the conversation that you'd actually bothered to listen to, you'd gathered that she'd arrived in New York from London just over three months ago. That meant she had a fucking accent. Of course she did. It made everything she said a thousand times more interesting.

"We were in Paris, in this little cafe. What was it called, babe? Maison de vie?"

"Maison de l'amour, doll." Bucky corrected her. It had only sounded right when he was calling you that.

Your eyes shot up from your drink, immediately staring daggers at them both. The slimy bastard. You had been the one to show him that place. You'd been in Paris for a mission, and after realising it was your four-month anniversary, you'd taken him there for pancakes. It had been a slow morning, filled with hazy eyes and pink skies, and it had ended with him dropping the L-bomb for the first time. The photo you'd taken of Bucky, sat beside a pile of pancakes the same size of him and with whipped cream on his chin, had been your phone background until the day you broke up.

"I've been there." You didn't break away from his gaze, holding cold blue eyes in a trance that he found to be almost suffocating.

"Oh, nice!" Katie beamed. "Did you enjoy it?"

"Yeah." You sniffed. "The company was shit, though."

"Oh, man." She replied. "I'm sorry to hear that."

"It's not your fault." You gave her a sweet smile - to Bucky, it was a look of venom. "So, tell me more about your trip to Paris."

He quickly cleared his throat. "We didn't do much. Just a weekend getaway-"

"- are you forgetting that we saw Billy Joel?" Katie cut him off with a laugh. "The Billy Joel!"

"Right." It looked as though his mouth had gone completely dry.

"He told me he loved me for the first time to Uptown Girl-"

"-excuse me for a moment." You shoved your glass in her hand, before backing away from your little huddle.

Your brain was focused on getting away and only on getting away. The room suddenly felt a thousand times hotter, and a thousand times smaller too, as though the walls were closing in on you. Maybe that wouldn't have been so bad if they'd just collapsed around you and swallowed you fucking whole. Anything to get away from this situation.

Making a beeline for the balcony doors, you elbowed them open and stepped outside. The cold air of the rooftop gardens was a welcome contrast to the stuffy indoors, biting, night air hitting your face like an icy hug. The sounds of the city rung below you - sirens and yells and tourists - and tangled into the faint sound of the music, all parts of a world that your brain was working overtime to block out.

You focused on the city instead, using the bright lights of the surrounding buildings to anchor you to reality. None of it really even made sense - you were over Bucky. Had been for a long time. It was just the thought of him doing all the things that he'd done with you, with someone else. It made you feel a little bad for Katie, too.

"I was going to tell you about Billy Joel."

You glanced over your shoulder, giving a derivative snort. "Piss off, Bucky."

"I'm serious." He ignored your demand, cautiously approaching you.

"I brought you those tickets!" You turned around to face him. "We were meant to go together. Billy Joel was our thing."

"We broke up!' He reminded you. "Like I said, I was going to tell you that we went together-"

"- I don't care." You cut him off. "I genuinely don't care."

"That was a lot of storming off for someone who doesn't care."

"Okay, maybe I care a little bit." You huffed, taking a seat on a bench. "It's not even that you're with someone else, it's that you're doing all the things we did. The nicknames, the pancake place, the concert."

"I..." Bucky took a seat beside you, pondering for a moment.

"And declaring your love for someone to Uptown Girl is fucking weird." You muttered.

"Do you have a better suggestion?"

"Vienna, obviously."

"You're such a pain in the ass." Bucky replied. "But for what it's worth, I wasn't thinking of Katie in that moment."

You glanced up at him, frowning. "What do you mean?"

"D'you remember that morning when we were in New Orleans?" He asked. "And we had a few hours to kill before our flight, so you started dancing around the hotel room to Uptown Girl?"

"I remember." You softly smiled.

"That was when I realised I loved you." He admitted. "I was replaying that in my head at the concert, and it just kinda came out, and Katie heard."

"Damn." You muttered. "Sucks to be her, huh?"

"I like Katie." He said. "Truth be told, doll, I'm still stuck in the past a little bit. With you, and with what we had."

"We fucking hated each other by the end, Buck."

"I know, but I mean all the stuff before that." He explained. "You were the first person who saw me for who I am and not what I've done. The first person that actually made me feel loved and worthy."

"I do try."

He lightly elbowed you "I'm serious. I think I'm just projecting my longing for what we had onto my current relationship."

"You're being painfully honest tonight." You observed. "It's fucking weird."

"Who taught me to be painfully honest?"

"Right." You rolled your eyes. "So this is how Frankenstein felt when he created his monster."

"You're the worst," Bucky muttered. "I genuinely am sorry, though. I shouldn't be recycling our memories. I should make new ones.'

Dusting off your trousers, you stood up. "You're right."

"Thank you, though."

"For what?"

"For finding me first," He replied, "and for teaching me what love is."

"Well, if you ever need to be reminded? You have my number."

#why am i low key in love with katie? #i want a tall woman who smells of strawberries :( #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnes angst #bucky barnes fluff #bucky barnes x gn!reader #bucky barnes x y/n #avengers x reader #avengers x you #avengers fluff #avengers angst #avengers imagines #avengers imagine #marvel imagines #marvel imagine

[razorblade180]

I have watched all of Bleach

That is currently available. Personally one of the funniest things throughout my entire time watching was looking at Carmine, my oc, and realizing I had basically made a soul reaper. Not surprising considering this show is full of cool anime stuff

I don’t know anyone’s opinion on Bleach when it comes to the arcs but personally everything after the Espada arc felt like a 10 to me. Probably because one arc is just 13 court squad team mirror matches with a villain that has broken powers. Also Kon had importance and I never expected that. It was actually really touching. While the Fullbring was also really fun to watch.

I laughed every time a new subset of abilities were introduced for a group, and they are functionally the same as the other groups because for some reason Flash Stepping has to be Soul Reaper exclusive so Hollows, Quincies, Fullbringers, etc. have to call their high speed movement anything besides that. It felt like Ichigo changed job classes but continued to invest in the same stats so the only thing he got was cooler outfits and maybe three new moves. I honestly enjoy that a lot.

Rukia had my heart from being to end. No one told me Toshiro’s VA in English is Neji Hyuga, so there was a never a moment he wasn’t the coolest guy to me. Even when he was losing I was like “god he’s so cool.” My two favorite characters use ice; very on brand. I always knew Ichigo was based and had many transformations so Liking him a given.

Surprisingly, not a fan of Renji. He jobs so hard I kinda feel bad. I was stunned seeing him be and look so cool in the Fullbring arc, but that’s like two episodes! I’m upset my friend told me Orihime was Hinata but she matters, because that’s absolutely correct. Don’t get me wrong, I like Hinata, but Orihime is so much better that I got upset as a Naruto fan. I already know the ending ship to Bleach and while I still can’t believe it considering the amount of moments I’ve witnessed Rukia and Ichigo be each other’s emotional support and hype man, I already know I’m not bothered by canon.

All in all, watching Bleach has been like eating chocolate. Even the bad parts weren’t so bad for me. The only thing I noticed watching Bleach that was consistent was no matter what problem came up, you better believe the people that would trivialize it were not there until the end. I should’ve counted how my times I said “Where’s Yoruichi?” Then she shows up later to clown an enemy we’ve been fighting for four episodes before leaving! They use her like a get out of jail free card for the plot and it’s both funny but also a little silly. Kinda feels like those people who put their strongest Pokémon in the last slot so everyone else gets to grow and things look dicey for them; then they send in the max lvl legendary.

Bonus:Aizen is hilarious. Grimmjow and a few others have some pretty dumb lines, but nothing will ever match any character talking about how they planned something, while various actions around him beg to differ; all the way until he’s like “What is this!?” When Ichigo is done with his nonsense. The X-cution plan felt more like a calculated chess maneuver then Aizen losing all his men and getting stabbed. I feel bad like his catchphrase should’ve been “I course corrected.” 😅

Also yeah I watched the fillers. The bount arc is painful, but everything else was fine. I can’t decide if it’s better or worse than Naruto filler.

#bleach #anime #razor rambles

[wishingtobeinadifferentuniverse]

My Lady (Boromir x Fem!Reader)

Warnings: Fluff, fighting

Word Count: 1719

Requested: @thespiritoflife

A/N I really liked writing this, and I hope you enjoy it! I figure it was about time to write for Boromir. For some reason, my first thought went to the Rohan, I don’t know why, so yeah, enjoy a person from Rohan falling for the captain of Gondor lol. Also, screw canon, Boromir lives y'all.

“So, this is the Captain I’ve been hearing about lately, fighting in all those battles,” I leaned over the counter, handing a mug to the rugged, handsome man across from me. He shook his dirty blond hair out of his face, smiling. 

“I suppose that would be me,” He said modestly. “But really, you should see my companion Aragorn in action, he is the best out of everyone.” I was surprised with the way he talked about this other person, rather than talking about himself. Most of the men I have talked to were like that. I looked into his eyes, searching for any hint of malice or dishonesty, but he was being truthful. He meant it. I was surprised, but after all, I should expect nothing less from a man of honor. 

I smiled cheekily. “Well, I guess I should then. Tell me, a fine man like yourself must have a sweet lady at home. She’s very lucky to have someone like you,” I blurted out without thinking.

He choked a little on his drink and wiped his mouth before smiling again. “Well my lady, you would be surprised to hear that this is not the case. I wish I had something like that, but not just one that sits at home.” He winked, and I hid a giggle, still embarrassed about what I said. 

  “Now, go enjoy your drink, Captain.” The minute he turned around, I cursed myself for being so forward. This was one of the reasons I wasn’t married yet, and my mother definitely liked to tease me about it. Very well, I went back to cleaning mugs, as the joyous noise swelled. Everyone was celebrating, for good reason, after all, these men helped to save us from ruin and despair. It was terrifying at Helm’s Deep, all of us women and children were shoved into the caves. Well, most of them...

The night began to draw to a close as the noise dwindled down. But there was still the hint of celebration in the air, and I smiled for the sake of it. A few people came back for their last drinks, and drunken steps followed. One person came back, that I had hoped to not see again. Alas, the Captain of Gondor stopped in front of me, not quite taken by drink and exhaustion. 

“Enjoyed the party?” I asked, cleaning up the last of the drinks. He grinned and nodded. “Glad to hear it,” I said, avoiding his gaze. I was still embarrassed about what happened earlier, and I really hoped it wouldn’t come up. 

Instead, he brought up something else. “I never got your name,” he said, moving his hand on top of mine. My stomach flipped over, how was his touch so intoxicating? I barely knew him. 

I swallowed the butterflies, and replied confidently, “My name is y/n. And I must admit, I have heard so much about you, but I’m not even sure as to what your name might be. It is Boromir, am I correct?”

“Yes, that would be me. Y/n, such a beautiful name.” He spoke thoughtfully, and my breath caught in my throat. We talked a bit more, but I slowed the conversation down. 

I withdrew my hand from his and went back to cleaning mugs. I couldn’t get involved with him, he was basically a prince after all. An emotion I couldn’t quite interpret flashed through his face, but he quickly stood up, understanding I wanted to be alone.

“Well, my lady y/n, I do hope we meet again.” He nodded his head and walked away. 

As soon as he turned a corner, I slumped down behind the counter. I knew that I could not be with him. I was just a woman of Rohan, nothing else. But there were so few men like him. Far too many would look down upon me, and there were only a few that would be respectful. But he was something completely different. It was such a short conversation, but I already regretted sending him away. At this point, there was nothing left I could do.

---------------------------------------Time Skip-------------------------------------

Death. Destruction. The ruins of Gondor loomed over me. Eowyn is missing. So many dead. I whirled around, trying my best to defend myself. Exhaustion wore me down. An orc hit me from behind, sinking its blade into my arm. I cried out, and with the last strength I had, I sliced its throat. I clutched my arm, trying to stop the blood from running down to my hands. I collapsed, curling up. As the world became dark, I could have sworn I heard someone yelling my name.

My head was ringing as I slowly opened my eyes, adjusting them to the light. I moved sluggishly, still trying to figure out what happened. I felt a cloth around my arm, binding it, and my face felt clean. Free of the blood and dirt that had been caked on it. But where was I? I sat up, breathing in the cool air. It looked like a healing ward, and someone else was here.

“Excuse me? Miss?” I called out to the other woman. She walked over briskly and set some pillows behind my back.

She flittered about, changing my dressings, all the while talking. “Oh I’m so sorry dear, I didn’t see that you were awake yet. I was told to give you the best treatment and to get you your own room, so here we are. I wasn’t sure when you were going to wake up, oh dear me. You should probably lay down for longer, you still have circles under your eyes. My you had a bunch of blood on you. I was so surprised to see such a young lady like yourself in such a horrid place. Bad luck I say, bad luck. Although I am so old, I have seen so much, but not something like this!” She babbled on, much to my amusement. She was a mother hen, pecking and poking into other’s business. But she was sweet. 

I interrupted her on another spiel, trying to get a straight answer. “I’m sorry, but who gave you these orders, to take care of me and such? I don’t mean to pry, I just want to know. Also, do you know how long this will take? I need to find some people.”

She smiled. “Oh dear, you have a lot in store for you. You’re fine to go walk around and find some people. However, I do suggest you take the path to the gardens, it is quite beautiful.” She winked, and exited the room, leaving the door open. I was slightly stunned, this was a lot to take in. I could not tell what she was hinting at though.

I pulled on some shoes and slowly began my way down. It was a clear path to where I was supposed to go, but I hesitated. What was with all this secrecy? I felt a knot in my stomach as I continued, wary of my surroundings. I knew there were no orcs, but something seemed off.

I turned a corner and heard a voice I did not expect. “I see your injuries have begun healing. I am glad to see it.” Boromir spoke softly, his gaze moving over me.

“Boromir?” I whispered, shocked to see him. “Wh-what is this? What’s going on?” He motioned me to sit next to him on the bench, and I did, a healthy distance away from him.

“I found you. On the field. I didn’t believe it was you at first, I thought my eyes were deceiving me, trying to give me what I wanted most. But it truly was you, and you were lying there, still, bleeding. I assumed the worst. I know we don’t know each other that well, so it must seem odd for me to care so much. But dear, you mean so much to me. More than you know. I’m not mad like the others for you being out there. I admire your bravery and the skills it must’ve taken to slay all the orcs around you. I wasn’t there, but based on the number of bodies around you, I would assume that would be your work. Well, I’m going on and on here, but what I’m really trying to say is, stay. Stay here, with me.” Boromir took a breath, his cheeks full of color. 

At this point, my stomach was exploding, I could feel that I was shaking a little. Sure, it wasn’t some love confession, but I didn’t need that from him. The fact that he wanted me to stay was enough. 

“I think I will stay, as long as we can visit Rohan often,” I said nervously. His cheeks grew even darker, and he held my hand and pressed the lightest kiss to it. I giggled, and he drew me into a warm hug. I nestled into his chest, hearing his heartbeat. Now, this is what I was missing out on this entire time.

“Wait,” I said, remembering what had happened at Helm’s Deep, what I hadn’t told anyone. “There is something you should know.”

Boromir cocked an eyebrow, obviously confused. “What do you mean?” He asked.

I looked down. “I, uh, might not have been in the caves with everyone else. In fact, do you remember the soldier that you saved from the spear? That might have been me. Possibly.” I smiled, and his face brightened.

“Oh yes, I know exactly who you’re talking abo- wait a minute. That was you? My lady, you are a brilliant warrior. The spear was a minor setback, you did amazing that night.” He gushed, and I grinned at how sweet he was being.

“Boromir, this does not bother you? That I was out fighting? That I, a woman, was part of a battle?” I questioned. 

He started laughing, his smile lighting up his eyes. He really was handsome. “No dear, not at all. In fact, it makes things even better. You are an amazing fighter and an amazing person. No, it doesn’t bother me one bit.”

The sun moved through the clouds, the rays hitting us perfectly. We sat and joked in the warmth all afternoon, forgetting the looming war for just a little bit.

Everything taglist: @hey-its-nonny 

#Boromir x reader #boromir #boromir x you #boromir x y/n #lotr #lotr writing

[angelanimedesaray]

Wings in the Dark Chapter 11: Rumors

AN:  Ahhh yes...we’ve passed the discovery bump...now...relationship building.

Why not start off with a bang :P  That in my defense, I feel like kind of makes perfect sense, considering animosity with past peers and what their arrangement might look like to outsides...especially outsiders with animosity... O.o

Also, yes, Hange eventually will be incorporated, just give me a bit, I’m slowly incorporating people XD

Characters:  Levi, Vampire!Fem!Reader, Petra, Eld, Gunther, Oluo, Erwin (Mentioned), Various Background Characters

Pairing:  (Eventual) Levi x Reader

Warnings:  Language, Mentions of Sexual Acts, Vicious? Rumors (Couldn’t pick the right word for it, settled with Vicious)

Word Count:  5320

<----Previous Chapter    Masterlist    Next Chapter---->

*Reader’s POV*

While the one on one training with Levi had not been at all what you were expecting when he pretty much ordered you to do it, it ended up being the most profitable training you'd had in a while.  For one, you had someone you could actually spar with, and despite his current status as undefeated among everyone else, he was taking his losses in your matches in stride.  If he lost, he would at least have some critiques in techniques, or what move would have worked better in such and such position.

He seemed to be approaching with the logic of 'just because you have superior strength and speed, doesn't mean you're good,' and was focused on refining talent into skill.

As well as improve and refine his own abilities, perhaps.  What better way than to repeatedly take on you, with your natural talents?  He'd managed to pin you a few times already.  You had the raw strength and speed, but his abilities weren't that far behind, and he had the skill.  He just needed a bit more knowledge on how to fight a vampire despite his disadvantages, and he'd probably be set.

Right now, the two of you were in the middle of a spar, hands flying in a quick back and forth of action and reaction, trying to get in a hit just to be parried, then trying to make that parry work to your advantage.  A punch in towards the chest resulting in the arm getting pushed aside, just for that hand to grab at the arm that had pushed it, to pull and try to throw them off balance, a foot coming in to try and sweep the feet at the same time, resulting in a side step, moving behind to try and put them in a choke hold, just to have them duck under the arm and go for a quick jab between the ribs, abandoned when an elbow came flying through the air to crash where their head was at, the attacking arm raising instead in defense.

These kinds of quick and fluid movements were what made up most of your sparring session, both of you constantly trying to catch the other off guard and gain the upper hand, raw talent with some tempered skill against a skill forged in fire.  Your heart pounded, excitement running unbridled in your veins now that you could have this spar without prying eyes, without having to hide the full extent of what you could do.  Of course, this also let Levi get a better look at the extent of your abilities, but you didn’t pay that part much mind.

Your eyes caught something that wasn’t so much of an opening as it was an opportunity, something you could exploit as a vampire.  Feeding off the thrill coursing through you, you took the opportunity, forcing your arm with your strength past his guard so your hand could grasp the front of his shirt, your other arm grasping somewhere that was much easier to reach as you went low.  Levi realized what was about to happen and tried to shift his weight, to make it more difficult, or perhaps twist himself out of your grip, but you were already lifting him in a throw over your shoulder, taking care to make sure he landed on his back and not his head before you whipped around and attempted to pin him, your knee on his gut, a hand on his chest, your other hand pulled back ready for a finishing strike if this had been real.

Levi froze up underneath you, staring up at you with a hard glint in his eyes that didn’t match his usual defeat.  There was even a spark of fear you hadn’t seen yet during these spars, and he seemed to tense like he was ready for a real life or death struggle.

You were confused for a few moments, breathing coming a little shallower than normal--yes, even a vampire could get tired, the stamina wasn’t limitless--as you held his gaze, trying to figure out what was wrong, the hand raised for ‘attack’ having dropped on instinct to show less of a threat.

Your emotions.  They were unbridled right now, all over the place, and channeled directly to the fight.  Which meant he wasn’t just holding your gaze because he was staring you down.  He had frozen because of your eyes.

You looked away, releasing him and backing up, feeling a rush of shame for giving him a scare like that, that you’d let yourself go that much that you weren’t even keeping control of your appearance.  Maybe during the fight he could forget, even for a moment, but when he was pinned with your eyes glowing red and locked on yours, it was a harsh and alarming reminder of what you really were.

“Sorry,” you murmured, a hand rising to your cheek as you kept your face turned away, waiting until you had a firm hold of yourself again and you were certain that there wouldn’t be so much as a red glint in your eyes when you did face him again.

You really hoped this little slip of yours wasn’t going to cost some of the trust that the two of you seemed to be building between each other with these training sessions.  Maybe not trust specifically, maybe more of rapport, but at the same time, there was far more trust that went into this than you’d realized.  These moments where you beat him, where you had him pinned...the two of you were alone in the woods, if something happened, no one would know, no one would be able to intervene.  And when he lost, for those few moments, he was at your mercy.  He might not be able to do anything if you lost control or simply decided to bite him one of these days.  Yet he continued to carry on the lessons despite that possibility and the level of risk in having these training sessions be private.  Then again, if they weren’t private, you couldn’t exactly train as much as you could now.

“I thought you had control over your bloodlust?” Levi asked sharply as he got to his feet behind you, notes of that distrust you used to hear from him creeping back into his voice.  You hadn’t heard it in a while, since the start of this training, so hearing them creep back in now…

“That wasn’t bloodlust,” you murmured, rubbing softly at your eyes and wishing you had a mirror to make sure the red was gone from them.

“When your eyes are red--” Levi started to argue, but you cut him off, turning to face him again since you were certain you had a clamp on your emotions again.

“That doesn’t just mean bloodlust.  It happens for multiple reasons,” you corrected him, fighting to keep your voice from anger or impatience.  You could understand the confusion, the only times he’d seen your eyes red had been in moments of bloodlust.  Never the other moments.  “Sometimes emotions running rampant can trigger it.  Especially in the middle of a fight, because a vampire’s instincts are already riled in a fight.  I could do it on command, I suppose, if I felt threatened or wanted to threaten--like when a cat’s hackles rise.  It’s not...just bloodlust,” you finished in a murmur, looking away again.

Still, even if it had been a misunderstanding you’d just given Levi quite the scare in that moment.  He might have thought you were a second away from actually ripping his throat out or something similar.

As a way to make it up to him, you decided to take the position of teacher for a moment, while you were both letting the mood cool from that spark towards danger a few moments ago.

"Listen, when you're fighting a vampire, it's not about strength and speed, it's about leverage and making each shot count," you started to say, pushing hair out of your face as you explained semi-nervously in lieu of an apology for giving him a scare like that.  "I'm far from the strongest vampire out there.  Even your strength and speed is only going to get you closer to even footing with them, you'll still have to be smart about it.  Get them off their feet, stun them, go in for what would normally be a kill shot if you're close enough and they're not expecting it.  Even if you know it won't kill them permanently and they'll come back, it will put them down long enough to escape...or find something to properly kill them with."

You didn't know why you decided to suddenly make this a lesson about killing vampires, but here you were, information running out of you like water from the spout.

"And if you're in a really bad spot, and they've already got their teeth in you...make them choke up.  Got for the throat.  Especially right here…" you touched a spot on your upper throat that made you feel strange just touching it with a bit of pressure, and then a little lower, closer to the base of the throat, where some pressure made you feel like you might throw up.  "Or here.  At the very least, it should get their fangs out of you.  But with a vampire, it's all about fighting smarter, not harder--like when you fight someone much larger than yourself."

Levi studied you for a moment, the on guard position he'd been holding draining from his body as he slowly relaxed in front of you, nodding to himself as he made his way back to the center of the clearing that acted as your starting position.

"We're not here to train me.  We're here for you.  Keep a hold of yourself and I won't have to do anything," Levi said, falling into an at the ready stance, hands up in front of him as he waited for you to approach so you could resume your training.

The other half of your personal training with Levi happened the same way every day.  Namely, he had you run the same maneuver at the exact same pace over and over and over again, until it all became muscle memory--pace included.  The theory was that if the pace could be ingrained into your muscle memory, then you wouldn't accidentally execute it too quickly for the gear to keep up when you acted on instinct in the field.  And, just so your abilities could still come into play and help with your execution, the first thing you did with every maneuver was figure out how fast you could pull it off without breaking the gear.  After that, you walked it back a step or two in speed so you didn't strain the gear and wear it out too quickly, but you were still able to pull off the maneuver with startling speed.

While those practices were much of the same, with you doing it over and over under Levi’s supervision and occasionally learning a new move from him at the start so that he was still teaching you, they were arguably more exhaustive than the morning training--at least mentally.  Levi didn't have to do much except observe, so he didn't look remotely bothered while you would look exhausted when you entered the mess hall to eat afterwards.

Since you two would come from the same place, and would usually enter when almost everyone else had received their food, you would end up in the line together, though Levi’s tray always wound up looking different from yours.  Because he was an officer, plus he was actually eating the food while you were strategically picking things you could pawn off on the horses or birds and squirrels later.

"Are you even going to eat half of that?" Levi asked critically.  You both knew you didn't need to eat, so the rations were kind of wasted on you, but you needed to keep up appearances, and what you did eat would help with cravings.

"Most of it is bribes for the horses.  Namely yours.  I think he likes me now, but he might feel betrayed if I don't give him a treat with everyone else," you teased him with a soft smile on your face, tossing an apple up into the air before putting it back where it belonged.

Levi rolled his eyes.  "Stop bribing my horse, he's going to get fat," Levi grumbled, pushing on with his tray.

It was nice that you could tease and joke with him now, even if it was just the brief, lighthearted stuff.  He really was making an effort to be more accepting with you.  When you weren't dragging the vampire stuff front and center, you could almost say he was comfortable around you.

Of course, until something reminded him what you were, or you talked about it, and he was on edge again.  He was going to need much more time to come to terms with the vampire side of you.  There was too much about it that made him uncomfortable and ill at ease.  That wasn’t something he would be able to get over just by spending more time around you--that was going to take some time and reflection of his own.

As you followed behind Levi in the line up, you spaced out slightly, listening in on some of the conversations going on around the mess hall, ranging from sore muscles from training today, to an upcoming shipment of fresh supplies, to how bad the food tasted.  And then, through all the meaningless chit-chat, something caught your attention.

“...definitely sleeping with Captain Levi.”

You paused, centering in on that one conversation, a bad pit in your stomach.

“Are you kidding me?  Captain Levi’s hardly the type.”

“I’m sorry, do you know anything about him?  Nobody really does, other than his irritable attitude and his reputation.  For all you know, he is the type.  And I’ll bet he is.  There’s no way she’s climbed the ranks that fast unless she’s climbed on someone’s dick along the way, I don’t care how skilled she is.”

“That’s foul.”

“It’s true!  There’s advancing because of your skill, and then there’s going from a fresh recruit to part of the elite squad in a couple days, to private lessons with Captain Levi not long after.  We’ve just gotten placed in Squads and barely started training with the squads.  And it’s a position they literally made up so she could be in Levi squad.  That’s beyond favoritism.  I’ll bet you when they come out of those woods every morning all sweaty and flushed and tired, it’s after she’s given him a good fuck to get on his good side.”

“Maybe they’re just sparring--hand to hand lessons…” someone else suggested weakly.

“If it was a spar they could do it on the training grounds like everyone else.  What they’re doing they have to hide.  They get up so early so no one will see what they’re up to, and I’ll bet that means they’re out there for hours.  It’s gotta be one hell of a blowjob she gives, that’s for sure.”

“Hey--what’s that look for?”

You snapped yourself out of the revolted and disturbed focus you’d found yourself in at Levi’s more immediate sounding voice trying to get your attention, eyes focusing on him as, for a moment, you found yourself at a loss of words for what to say to him after hearing...that.

And he had no clue.  Because besides the people /in/ that conversation, you’d been the only one to hear it.

He looked concerned, maybe even worried, his mind probably coming up with a bunch of worst-case-scenarios for what you felt or heard that gave you whatever expression you currently had.

You shook your head, sliding your tray to the side to get him to keep moving or else risk their trays crashing into each other with the contents spilling everywhere.  “I heard something I did not want to hear.  Just keep going,” you said dismissively, trying to brush it off as someone having a roll in the hay in the stables or a quickie in the supply closet--whatever kept him from even getting a hint of what you actually heard.

If it was just your reputation they were trashing, maybe you wouldn’t mind so much--you knew it wasn’t true, that it was as far from the truth as they could get.  What made it really worry you was how it also dug at Levi’s reputation.  Maybe he wouldn’t care, but maybe he would.  You hoped if the rumor reached the rest of Levi’s squad, that they wouldn’t believe it.  They knew Levi better than most people here, surely they’d know it wasn’t true?  But you could also see how that was a rumor that would burn like fire through the ranks.

Behind Levi’s back as he continued down through the line, that worried look lingered in your eyes, wondering if you should do something about the rumor, or just leave it alone.  Normally you would just leave it alone, but this one seemed...insidious to you.  Or at least, you didn’t like the thought of people spreading it further, even if you knew the people that mattered knew better, or might know better.

You ended up breaking away from the line before Levi did, heading for the table that the squad usually sat at and trying to shake off the concerns and worries eating at you in the back of your mind, giving them a shy smile as you took the seat next to Petra.

“So, newbie--private training with the Captain, already?  Someone moves fast,” Oluo said conspiratorially before you could even sit down.

Had they already heard that damn rumor?  Was it already making its way through the ranks and you just hadn’t heard it yet?

“Oluo, don’t be an ass,” Petra scolded him in answer.  “And she’s not much of a newbie anymore.”

“She’s a newbie until she’s been out on a few expeditions, Petra,” Gunther commented.

“Whatever--you’re really getting private lessons with the Captain?  Two a day, from what I hear?” Oluo asked, cutting past the debate over whether or not you were a newbie.

“It would explain where you disappear to in the mornings and just before dinner,” Eld added quietly from where he usually just observed these back and forths between you, Eld, and Petra.

“None of us get one on one training with Captain Levi,” Oluo stressed, leaning forward in his seat.  “How’d you do it?”

At that moment, Levi appeared at the head of the table, setting down his tray with an agitated sigh.  “She needs someone to kick her ass into the dirt every now and then,” Levi said simply in answer to the debate bouncing around you.

Petra turned to look at you with a slightly apologetic look on her face.  “You are pretty infuriating to spar with.”

“So I’ve been told,” you answered, feeling yourself start to relax again as the conversation started to drift into what you considered safer waters.

“Sometimes, I swear you’re letting us win,” Gunther added, clearly agreeing with Petra on that matter.

“Because she is,” Levi said bluntly from the head of the table.  You gave him a sharp look that clearly asked why the fuck was he outing you, but he didn’t even glance in your direction as the rest of the table fell awkwardly silent.  “It’s why she trains with me in the mornings--she needs a tougher opponent.”

You blushed, feeling the attention shifting to you.  “I wouldn’t put it that way,” you muttered under your breath, worried it might come off as Levi suggesting the other four weren’t good enough to spar with her, that they weren’t at her level, that she needed someone who actually presented a challenge.

All of those could be taken rather insultingly, considering you were apparently still new enough to be considered a newbie by most of the squad.

Levi held your gaze from across the table.  “How about next time you spar with them, you don’t hold back and let them see for themselves.”

“Put that effort into sparring with your comrades, and they might learn something.”

The first thing he’d ever tried to teach you, back when he’d first encountered you.

You nodded, deciding not to question his judgement on this.  He knew the other members of the squad better than you did.  And not he was aware of your secret and could properly assess risks.  You were going to trust his judgement on this one, despite your own confusion or reservations.

“Yes, sir,” you said with a nod, turning back to the food in front of you with a slightly thoughtful frown.

*Levi’s POV*

After shooing Y/N away from taking care of the horses like she usually did, Levi was spending some much needed time with his horse, brushing down the black steed’s coat and gently rubbing his neck, forehead, and muzzle--whichever he could reach.

“You’re putting on a bit of weight,” Levi remarked lowly, eyes roaming over his horse’s frame.  “If she’s going to give you so many treats, she could at least make sure you get the exercise to keep from gaining the weight…”

The horse just snorted and tossed his head, settling back down when Levi gave him a disapproving look before Levi continued brushing him, taking a moment to let the sound of the horses moving around and nickering softly in the stables soothe him away from the bustle of the Scout’s headquarters.

The stable door opened, and Levi glanced out the stall to see who it was, half expecting it to be Y/N again and for him to have to shoo her away again so he could have quiet time with his horse.

It was Petra, actually, and she went right by the stall that her horse was kept in and made a beeline for where Levi was standing by the entrance to his horse’s stall.

“Captain, I need to talk to you about something,” she said seriously, a flush of nervousness coloring her cheeks as she came to a stop in front of him.  Levi’s eyebrows rose at her demeanor, but he didn’t say anything, intending for her to continue without further prompting from him.

“There’s a rumor that’s been going around…”

Levi snorted softly, turning back to his horse.  “You know I don’t give a damn about what’s going through the gossip chain for the week.”

“I know, and normally I wouldn’t say anything, but...this one’s pretty bad.  And it’s only getting more out of hand.  And I thought I should give you a warning before someone tries to do something about it.”

That caught his attention.  People throwing rumors around was one thing.  A nasty rumor that could stir people to action, though, that was something that he might want to give a bit of attention to.  And considering Petra was coming to him about it as a warning, it involved him.

“People have been saying that Y/N has been getting her promotions and placements by sleeping with superior officers...namely you, and that it's still going on right now.  Now, the rest of the squad and I don’t believe it, but there are some people who believe it’s true to the point they’re planning on bringing their concerns to Erwin,” Petra told him nervously, the slight shake in her voice getting worse when Levi’s expression darkened considerably.

That was quite an accusation.  And apparently one people were believing enough to try and take action about.  But to think some people would believe he was actually the type to be bought with sexual favors.

Well, actually, he was used to people thinking lowly of him, but this was a line he’d thought it was clear he wasn’t ever going to cross--either falling into the trap of accepting sexual favors in return for promotions, or exploiting someone in a lower position for them.  It was a filthy rumor, and Petra was right, this was one he preferred to have a heads up on so he could do something to shoot them down before they got any further.

This wasn’t a rumor that could be combated with words--no one was going to believe it no matter how insistent Y/N or he got, but maybe, at least for a little while, if it was more out in the open that they were just training, and it was for good reason, maybe it would help abate the rumors.

Maybe letting them go to Erwin was a good idea.  Erwin knew what was actually happening--hell, Levi gave him regular reports on her progress, since the man wanted to keep a close eye on his new asset while he decided how best to use her in the grand scheme of his goals.  Then again, Erwin might have to be forced to investigate anyway, considering the seriousness of the claims, even if they both knew it was just a nasty rumor that had gone too far.  And Levi and Y/N were spending plenty of time alone and out of the public eye where no one knew what could be happening--besides the three who knew exactly what was happening, but their witness wasn’t there, physically.

Petra was watching his reaction in tense anticipation, staring at him as his eyes roamed around at something only he could see, considering his options and how best to handle the situation.  He went back to his horse, giving the almost perfectly shining coat another few brushes before he answered.

“Thank you, Petra.  I’m sure if it does get to Erwin, he’ll know better--he knows what I’ve been training her on and when, so it shouldn’t be much of a problem.  But if it does become one, it’ll blow over,” Levi reassured her, exuding an outward demeanor of calm after deciding on a few minor moves to help dispel the rumors.

*Reader’s POV*

About a week after you had overheard the rumor in the mess hall, and well aware that the rumor was only getting worse, Levi called you into his office to discuss that very rumor.  Apparently, Petra had told him about it, including the lovely fact that there was a group that was going to go to Erwin to have him take action about it like it was possibly true.  Besides letting you know that he knew, the only thing Levi was requesting that they do in order to try and combat some of the rumors, was to move their just-before dinner training with the ODM gear onto the training field so there were witnesses that they were just training, and at least once in the upcoming days, the two of you were going to do your hand to hand training on the training field where there were witnesses to see that you actually did need to train with him for the sparring.

You would, of course, have to refrain from doing something openly vampiric, even though normally during your morning spars you could cut loose, but the two of you sparring and being rather evenly matched would probably be plenty of evidence to show that you had earned your spot on Levi’s squad (Even if the circumstances had been unique).

However, something about him going to these lengths sort of bugged you.  You understood how serious it would become once people took it to Erwin, but at the same time…

“Thank you, Captain Levi, but...you don’t have to do any of this for me just because of some rumors.  I don’t really care what they think of me,” you said hesitantly.  The only people that mattered were the ones that didn’t believe the rumors, from what you were aware.  It was mostly people who had some kind of a grudge against you from the training cadets or simply out of jealousy that were pushing it further than just a rumor and willing to actually believe you and Levi were the kind of people to be doing something like that.

“What makes you think I’m doing this for you?” he asked, possibly a little sharper than he’d intended.

He had a point, though.  This didn’t just hurt your reputation, it could hurt his credibility as well if it made it to the point of a legitimate investigation, whether the two of you were cleared or not.  No one would forget that there had been enough to question him, that he had still been investigated for accepting sexual favors, whether it had been true or not.  You were both in the same boat in this mess.  He didn’t seem like the kind of person to normally care about petty rumors, but this one was going too far.

“Okay then...but on one condition,” you said firmly, sitting up in your seat.  Levi leaned back, studying you for a moment, looking a little confused that you even had a condition for going along with trying to clear your names up even a little from these rumors.  “No matter how the spar goes, you have to be the one to win it when we’re in front of everyone.”

Levi stared you down for several long minutes, the silence almost getting painful as he seemed to be trying to read you, to glean why this was your condition, why you were so insistent about it.  Maybe he was also thinking back to how you’d thrown your first match with him even though you were about to win, and how that one had been in front of everyone...while you had never thrown a fight when it was just the two of you, and you’d even beaten him a few times.

“Why is it so important to you that you lose to me when we’re in front of everyone?” he finally asked.

“The same reason I threw the fight when we met.  You’re Humanity’s Strongest.  I know it might not even matter to you, but it does to me.  I don’t want that title, I don’t deserve it--I’m not even human.  You do--deserve the title, I mean.  I can’t take it, I refuse to, even if it’s bestowed by people who don’t know any better.”  You licked your lips, heaving a soft and somewhat tired sigh.  “That’s why you can’t let me win when it’s not just the two of us.  I can’t even risk the thought entering their minds that you’re not Humanity’s Strongest anymore, because that’s not true.  Not that they’d ever know.”

“I really don’t give a damn about whatever title they want to try and fit me with,” Levi said, his voice surprisingly not betraying anything about what he thought--not yet, anyway.

“But I do.  I hate to sound superficial, but it does matter to me that you stay the one they see as Humanity’s Strongest, and it doesn’t get passed on to me.  So that’s my condition.  You have to win the spar at the end.”

Levi nodded slowly, getting to his feet.  “All right, then.  I’ll win the spar,” he agreed, gesturing for the door.  “I’d invite you to have some tea with all this shit going on, but we probably shouldn’t be spending any more time by ourselves until this whole mess blows over.”

“Of course,” you said, getting to your feet and ready to leave.  You paused by the door, turning to look at him.  “And Captain…”

He looked up from where he was getting his jacket off the chair, looking at you expectantly.

“Thank you.  For training me, and...giving me a chance.  Despite everything,” you said, feeling awkwardness drip into your tone and a blush color your cheeks before you hurriedly left the room, shutting the door before you could see his reaction or he had the chance to answer with a snarky or sharp reply.

Next Chapter---->

Levi Tags:  @clary-quinn​ @humanitys-hottestsoldier @whalerus​ @sunny-flo​ @thirstyforsometea​ @hauntedhousecat​ @peaches-and-clouds​

Wings in the Dark Tags: @regalillegal​ @animeluver23​ @theshylittleelfgirl​ @queenthorin1​ @dilucs-thighs @sociallyanxiousmouse @subtlepjiminie​ @hakunamatatayqueen​​ @queenofcurse​ @linxiajei17​ @levisbebe @toni-jones​​​ @pinkberrymilktea​

#levi #levi ackerman #captain levi #levi aot #aot levi #levi snk #snk levi #Levi Heichou #reader insert #vampire!reader #fem!reader #vampire!fem!reader #levi x reader #levi ackerman x reader #captain levi x reader #aot levi x reader #levi x vampire!reader #captain levi x vampire!reader #aot levi x vampire!reader #levi ackerman x vampire!reader #levi fanfic #levi fanfiction #levi fan fic #levi fan fiction #levi ackerman fanfic #levi ackerman fan fiction #levi ackerman fan fic #levi ackerman fanfiction #captain levi fanfic #captain levi fan fiction

[mirai227]

How to go from beginner to intermediate in a language!

Hi! I recently reached an intermediate level in French, and I am on my way to reaching an intermediate level in Spanish too, so I thought I would try to offer some tips and ideas about how you could reach an intermediate level in your target language as well.

What does an intermediate level feel like?

So from what I can gather, the beginner level (about A1/A2 on the CEFR scale for languages) is where you can communicate on a very basic level, and can only really understand beginner learners' content. Native material is kind of a no go (except maybe for children’s content). You can understand about 30% of what natives say at natural speed, and can struggle through some basic articles with key vocabulary, as long as you are already familiar with the subject and the key vocabulary. You can express yourself in quite a limited way, and can speak about familiar subjects, while being able to provide some simple explanations why. This self-assessment grid can tell you more about what you can and can’t do at these levels.

At the intermediate level (about B1/B2), native material is slowly but surely becoming more easy for you to understand. For me, it usually means that I can understand enough words and phrases when native speakers speak to piece together what they are discussing, though I can’t really provide specifics. You can understand about 50/60% of what natives are saying about a relatively wide range of everyday subjects (though specialised language for complex adult discussions on things like science and philosophy is usually too difficult at this stage). You can express yourself quite well on a wide range of subjects, though in an often clumsy and simplistic manner. At this level, you should be able to survive in a country where the language is spoken, and operate fairly well in a professional setting (if the language required is not too complex). You will definitely make a lot of mistakes, but not too many, so you should be understood by natives. This self-assessment grid can tell you more about what you can and can’t do at these levels.

What should your goals generally be here?

Greatly expand your vocabulary.

Improve your grammar to a passable conversational level (watch this video clip to understand what I mean).

Get comfortable speaking with native speakers.

Make sure that most of your study time is spent consuming or using your target language. Minimise contact with the languages you already know, except maybe for grammar.

Spend a minimum of around 1-2 hours a day on your target language.

How should you reach intermediate level?

Use a textbook for around that level. For me, I used the higher tier textbooks for GCSEs, which is about the level that I wanted to reach. I went through the whole textbook, learnt all the vocabulary that I came across, and did all the practice questions that I could find. This helped me immensely. Textbooks are usually organised to provide the base of what you need to reach an intermediate level. However, they should not be used alone.

Find a native speaker to talk to! Seriously, this helped me so so much. Before, I was not comfortable speaking to natives in French at all, but I started to speak with a friend of mine twice a week, and I was absolutely stunned by how much more smooth and confident my speaking became. I looked up words that I needed to know while I was speaking with her, and this really helped me fill in the gaps of my knowledge. I also learnt a lot of the nuances in French and and discovered some really cool and useful phrases. Try making a habit of speaking either with someone, or by yourself every day. If you don’t know something, then google translate is your friend! That way you can learn really cool set phrases. You can usually find someone to talk to on discord servers if you join some language learning ones, though be very careful about revealing any personal details or your face. Arrange a fixed time a few times a week and stick to it!

Study every day. Seriously, I really dropped the ball with my Spanish and because of this, my progress has been really slow. I could be at the intermediate level in Spanish already, but because I’ve been so slow, I’m not. Figure out what time of day you are most productive at (for me this is the early morning) and set a fixed time for studying your target language. It’s okay to experiment a little, and for it to take some time to figure out your schedule. With languages, at this stage, it is very easy to forget things, so going a long time without studying (longer than a month) is really going to hinder your progress. Still, you should always be your first priority, so if things are too busy for your studies at the moment, then it is fine to put your studies on hold for a while, or even stop them altogether. Just make peace with the fact that your progress will be a little slower than you might like.

Do lots of practice questions for grammar. It is all well and good to hear about the rules and write notes down, but if you cannot use it in practice, then frankly, you do not know the rule. Find a grammar workbook, like this one, or this one, and work through it. You can use HiNative to find corrections if you do not know the answer. Then, try making sure that you actually use it in your writing or speaking. Experiment, and learn from the corrections that people make.

Keep a journal in the language, and post it on websites like Journaly. Write about subjects that you already know about, and make sure that you use as many grammar rules that you know as you can. Try to elaborate on your reasons and opinions on things. It will be difficult at first, and you will make absolutely loads of mistakes, but as time goes on, you will gradually start to improve. Look up words that you don’t know, and write them down so that you can learn them later.

Try listening to intermediate content. Yes, it will be difficult, and you won’t be able to understand much, but as time goes on, you will slowly become more accustomed to the vocabulary you need to reach that level. Make sure whatever podcast you are listening to has a transcript, and highlight and learn the new vocabulary that you have discovered using Anki, or any flashcard app. Listen whenever you have time to kill, like on the train or when you are doing the dishwasher - it’ll really help!

Text natives on apps like Tandem or HelloTalk. It’ll get you used to forming the written language more quickly, and will let you practice more conversational phrases.

Make sure that you have the basics of grammar down, like all the essential tenses and basic particles, before moving onto harder things. Find a list of grammar, or a textbook that specifically covers intermediate level, and do lots of practice questions on each one.

Watch some native content on YouTube on subjects that you are familiar with and really like. Again, this will be difficult, but helpful! Make sure the videos have subtitles in the target language so that you can follow what it is about. Do NOT use english subtitles. It is vital that you get used to understanding the language without the crutch of the languages you already know. Look up the words that you do not know, and learn them using whatever vocabulary learning method that you like.

Read children’s (like, young children) stories and books to practice reading. It will be surprisingly difficult, because the grammar used in children’s books is usually for around a certain degree of fluency. Learn the vocabulary you don’t know, and try to practice when you can.

Learner’s material and articles are usually quite good for reading as well, as they are frequently quite challenging. You can find some in your textbook, or online if you google “[language] intermediate reading exercises”. You can probably also find reading comprehension books online if you try hard enough.

Learn vocabulary in context instead of memorising lists of vocabulary. Find the vocabulary you don’t know in all the content you are consuming, or look up words that you want to use yourself, and write them down with example sentences. Then, learn them using flashcard apps or websites like memrise, quizlet and anki.

For your pronunciation, shadow native speakers. Listen to how they say words, and imitate them. Personally, I use Easy Languages videos for this, along with random YouTube videos with subtitles in the target language. If a certain sound is difficult for you, then be proactive! Look up YouTube videos and articles on how to pronounce the word, and keep on practicing until you eventually get it.

Engaging with people on social media can be a fun easy way of practicing your TL. You can read or listen to posts and leave comments.

That’s it! That’s all the advice I can possibly think of. I hope you found this post helpful!

Here are some articles that I have found useful in the past:

How You Can Become Fluent in a Language - In Just One Year By Ramsay Lewis

9 points about language learning and how I’m learning 20+ of them By @ravenclawhard

Language learning tips for beginner & intermediate learners 🌍 By Lindie Botes/ @rinkodesu

[oldjane]

So this friend of mine, whose tumblr handle I don’t even know, so Imma link to their ao3 profile instead, was going feral about some movie they saw, and about a JoeNicky AU for it, and I haven’t seen the movie, don’t even remember the name of it, but well.

Here is... Some AU (unedited).

“We have to get out of here!”

Nile’s panicked voice spurs him on. He is running to the dock, hoping the emergency pods are not too badly damaged by the ravage going on around them. Joe is half a step in front of him.

Nicky doesn’t know where everybody else is – most of the inhabitants got evacuated late yesterday afternoon, but there will still be dozens of people who didn’t make it onto the evac shuttles. Nobody expected disaster to strike quite so soon. Nicky knows pods have been leaving all day, but they thought they had at least two more days. There will be people trapped, families who are desperately trying to make it to the pods –

Nicky stops, tries to turn around, but Joe notices and grabs his wrist.

“Nicky, no! We need to go, now!”

“But there might be others, we should –”

“No!” Joe’s voice is sharp, and he tugs at Nicky’s arm desperately. “There is no time!”

His eyes are huge, and his curls stick to his sweaty temple. His shirt is dirty and there is a gash on his arm. It is a far cry from the cool and calm engineer who arrived almost three years ago, introducing himself to Nicky with a wink. But he is still the most handsome man Nicky ever saw.

He fell in love with Joe at that first wink, and somehow, Joe didn’t seem to mind Nicky being painfully shy and blushing fervently as he awkwardly managed to introduce himself. Over the next two months, Joe simultaneously managed to draw Nicky out of his shell and make himself a fixture in Nicky’s comfort zone. They’ve been the best of friends and Nicky kept his feelings firmly under lock, afraid of losing Joe completely.

“Come on, Nicky, please!”

Nicky throws one last look over his shoulder, and Joe almost dislocates Nicky’s shoulder, he is yanking his arm so wildly.

There is nothing Nicky can do, and so he follows Joe. He would follow Joe everywhere.

The dock is in complete disarray. A lot of the stations are empty, and Nicky is glad that so many people got out. The far side of the dock is completely destroyed, and some of the remaining pods seem too damaged to risk the journey.

Nile yells at them to hurry. They run to where she found a pod in a good state.

“I don’t know – I never used these things –”

She is trying to enter the correct code with hands that tremble terribly, and Nicky looks at Joe. Joe nods, and he covers Nile’s hand with his own.

“It’s really easy,” he shushes, and he turns her towards him while Nicky makes quick work of unlocking the pod and firing up the systems. He hears Joe talk to Nile, explain to her how the pods work, what will happen. His voice is soft and calm, and Nile sniffs away her tears as she nods.

Nicky’s heart could explode. Here is Joe, taking care of one of their friends, as if this is just another day and they are not minutes away from being completely wiped away.

Nile steps into the pod, and without hesitation, Nicky and Joe strap her in, as if they have done this a thousand times. Their hands brush. Nicky feels the usual combo of heart flutters and a sense of belonging whenever he and Joe touch, but there is no time for that. He keeps running the procedures, and Joe keeps talking to Nile.

“You will get to the surface, and we will be right behind you, okay? I promise we won’t leave you alone. A beacon signal will alert home base, it will be no longer than thirty minutes before the chopper picks us up. You can open the hatch as soon as this light comes on, okay?” He points to the clear indicator. “The systems are all working perfectly,” he continues, when Nicky reaches the final check. “Tell me what you have to do.”

“Enter my personal code and the take-off code – seven-nine-four, enter, three-nine-three. Then the green button. Close the hatch.” she says, sounding almost normal, ticking it off on her fingers. “When I get up, this light will come on and I open the hatch. You will be right behind me. The chopper will be there not long after.”

“Good,” Joe replies fondly. “You’ll be fine, Nile. Keep your eyes on the screen, the counter will start as soon as you take off. We will see you up there in fifteen minutes.”

As Joe reassures Nile one last time, Nicky scans the stations. They can’t go back to the main section anymore, they need to find undamaged pods here and they need to be fast. The warning signs for critically low oxygen levels have been blasting for at least twenty minutes now. They could run out any minute. But most stations are empty, and the pods that are still here are broken and rusty.

There. Nicky sees one, and as soon as Nile closes the hatch, he pulls Joe along.

He opens the pod, and he breathes out in relief when it reacts immediately. It seems to be functional, and he pushes Joe in, entering the launch key.

Joe goes along, strapping himself in.

“Leave it, Nicky, I can do this myself, get to a pod –”

Nicky knows exactly when Joe notices what Nicky already knew. He starts unstrapping, but Nicky is faster. He locks Joe’s chair in place, keeps working on the take-off checklist.

“Nicky, stop, we can find you one further along –”

“There is no time, Joe,” Nicky says calmly. “We will run out of oxygen in seconds.”

“Come in, then, I won’t leave you –”

“There is not enough oxygen for two, Joe, you know that.”

“We will breathe as little as possible, hold our breath, something! Nicky, they never even tested that stuff, we could –”

“We are not risking it, Joe. One of us has to make it up there alive for Nile. You promised her.”

Joe is frantic now.

“Not without you, Nicky, stop, please!”

He reaches for the touch screen, trying to override Nicky’s commands. Nicky slaps him full in the face, and Joe falls back in the chair, stunned. It gives Nicky just the seconds he needs to complete the final procedure. He knows Joe’s code, of course, they’ve been friends for years, and he doesn’t make a mistake. Then the same numbers Joe told Nile, seven-nine-four, enter, three-nine-three.

“Nicky, no,” Joe begs, and –

Nicky presses the green button, not looking at Joe, not listening to his pleas.

Nicky will die here. He will die, within the next minute, while Joe is travelling up, and –

Nicky grabs Joe’s face between his large hands. One cheek feels hot where Nicky slapped him, but he doesn’t pay attention to that.

He stares into Joe’s beautiful, beloved eyes, and he bends closer to press his lips on Joe’s.

It is too short, too chaste for three years of pining, but there is no time – a crash, close by, vibrates through the structure, and Nicky pulls back. Joe starts saying something, but Nicky shakes his head and closes the hatch, gently but determinedly.

He hears Joe’s voice, calling out for him, but then the pod is sealed hermetically. It takes off smoothly, and Nicky’s knees buckle.

 ***

The fifteen minutes before Joe reaches the surface are the longest and the shortest of his life.

He screams himself hoarse in fifteen minutes, he bangs his fists on the inside walls of the pod until his knuckles burst, and then he touches his lips, where Nicky’s were but the blink of an eye ago.

Almost three years of dreaming about Nicky’s kiss, and –

And now –

He curses himself. He should have known Nicky would make sure everybody else got out before him. He should have seen right through him, should have forced him to go first –

He should have told Nicky he was in love with him three years ago. He should have kissed that man every chance he got, because now he will not ever get to again.

He is too distracted to pay attention to the screen or the indicators, and only when a robotic voice announces he needs to open the hatch because oxygen is low, he mechanically unstraps and enters the correct code.

Nile is floating right by his side.

“Oh, thank God!” she says as soon as he stands up. “Your pod arrived but you didn’t open the hatch, I was freaking out here, I didn’t know if there was a problem or – wait.” She takes a look at Joe, and she cuts herself off.

Joe doesn’t know how he looks – his eyes feel puffy and tears are streaming over his cheeks and his hands are bloodied.

“Wait,” Nile says again, unsteady. “Your pod arrived at least five minutes ago. Why isn’t – where is Nicky?”

Joe can’t help himself. A fresh wave of tears springs to his eyes, and he screams to the heavens.

He wants to dive back into the water, swim down, every meter a meter closer to Nicky, until he drowns as close to Nicky as he’ll ever be again.

Nile gasps.

“Joe, Nicky – Nicky made it out, right?”

He doesn’t answer, just sobs, his lungs burning, his throat choked up.

Nile reaches her arms out for him in a futile gesture, since they are both confined to their pods, and anyway, hers are not the arms Joe wants around him right now.

“I am sorry,” he hears Nile whisper, but it doesn’t help either. It feels like nothing will ever help.

If you asked him two days ago, he would have said feeling the sun on his skin again would make him the happiest man ever – it would have been a lie, of course. Kissing Nicky would make him the happiest man ever, and he got to do that, and the sun is reflecting from the water, but nothing will ever make him happy again.

The water has exactly the same colour as Nicky’s eyes.

He should say something to Nile, praise her for making it up here, assure her they would be picked up any minute now, tell her he loves Nicky with all his heart – though she might have some inkling of that by now – but he cannot bring himself to do any of it.

Then he hears the rhythmic sounds of the helicopter blades, and he will be brought to home base, and he will be further away from Nicky than he ever has been since they met, and –

Nile is winched up first, and then Joe. Somebody is interrogating Nile when he is pulled into the chopper.

“Anybody else coming?” a rough voice asks, and Joe curls in upon himself on the floor as he shakes his head.

“We were the last people at the dock,” Nile says hesitantly, “The two of us and – and Nicky – but we were out of oxygen –”

“So we are still waiting for this Nicky then?” the pilot asks, and Nile looks at Joe.

Joe doesn’t answer, can’t speak, wants to get to the base and be left alone for a week – a month – maybe a lifetime.

“I – I don’t think so,” Nile says. “There were not many pods left, and most were damaged, and – and we’ve been up for ten minutes, and –”

She doesn’t finish, but everybody knows what she’s not saying. There was not enough oxygen left for ten minutes. Nicky isn’t coming.

“Sorry,” the first speaker says. “Let’s go, then,” he directs the pilot, and they swerve off. Joe stares to the window, to their floating pods. A boat will come by later, tomorrow or the day after, to retrieve the pods. Somewhere, miles below, is Nicky.

Did he suffer? Did he regret kissing Joe as he died all alone?

Another sobs wrecks through him, and Nile does pull him closer this time, and Joe buries his face against her shoulder as he cries his heart out.

And then suddenly a harsh beeping fills the cabin.

“What the –” the pilot mutters, and the other guy’s voice is hard.

“You said there was nobody else!”

Joe’s heart leaps into his throat.

Nile speaks up.

“We thought – we didn’t know –”

“Could be something else too,” the pilot mutters. “Let’s check.”

The chopper swerves again, and two dots appear as they get closer, but no –

There is a third pod there, and the beacon signal gets louder, almost deafening Joe.

“Joe – Joe, look,” Nile says, and Joe does.

The pod is battered and cracked, an older model by the looks of things. It’s a miracle it made it, any of these fractures look like they could tear the thing in two any second, and –

Nothing.

The hatch doesn’t open, and Joe dies a second time that day. Is it just an empty pod that managed to launch itself somehow?

They get closer, and still no sign of life. The diver is winched down, and he pries open the hatch so agonizingly slowly.

Then they hear his voice through his comms system.

“There is someone in here. Male, unconscious. Twenty-five, thirty, maybe. Brown hair.”

“That your friend?” the pilot asks.

“Yes, maybe,” Nile says, hope dripping from every syllable.

“Older model pod,” the diver continues. “Takes longer to come up. Amazed it even got here, seems to have not been maintained in years.”

The winching up is silent, and it seems to take so much longer than when it was Joe hanging there. Every second is a lifetime.

“He has a mole on his chin,” the diver then says, and Joe doesn’t believe his ears, asks Nile to repeat, but she just hugs him, laughing and crying at the same time.

“It’s Nicky, Joe! It’s him! He made it.”

And then the diver is pulling him in, and it’s Nicky, and he is breathing, and Joe is sobbing again, from joy this time.

The diver puts an oxygen mask on Nicky, and Joe crawls over, cradles Nicky close, kisses his jaw, his hair, his hand.

He’s gonna do that for a long time, if Nicky allows him to. As soon as Nicky wakes up, he will tell him he has loved him since he first saw him, competently bandaging up somebody who had fallen off a ladder, setting a broken bone and wrapping up a deep wound on their temple. He had been talking softly the whole time, reassuring the woman it would be fine, distracting her from the pain, and at the same time managing to keep the woman’s young child calm. He’d been so effortlessly competent and kind and so damn attractive. Joe had introduced himself and Nicky had been adorably shy, and Joe had been hopelessly lost.

And then he’d wasted three years.

And he’ll be damned if he wastes another second.

Nicky opens his eyes, and blinks. Joe smiles, but he must look a freight. And yet, Nicky pulls off the mask, and he mouths Joe’s name, though no sound comes out.

“Nicky,” Joe stutters, and then he decides talking is overrated.

He softly, gently lays his hands on Nicky’s face. He stares into Nicky’s beautiful, beloved eyes, and he bends closer to press his lips on Nicky’s.

There is nothing short about it. They have three years to make up for, and the rest of their life to do it.

#I write things #The Old Guard #JoeNicky #Kaysanova #fanfic

[torterrachampion]

A completely unhinged discussion about every one of Chloé's outfits and how I feel about them:

under the cut because it's too long

First up, Chloé's childhood outfits. I will admit the details are hard to make out. In the first image she's pretty much covered completely in a cloak. All we can really see of her dress is the sleeve but I think the sleeve is cute. Solid 5/10 Chloé outfit. Nothing noteworthy but perfectly serviceable and I think she looks cute bundled up in a cloak.

Then we have the dress she's wearing while her father promises to make her human. I like dark colours on Chloé and the dress does suit her but again, not many details that can be made out. I like the collar that can be seen briefly in one panel but I'm not a fan of the headpiece really. It's cute though 6/10

Next up, this outfit is only seen very briefly in one panel. It's what Chloé wears at her father's bedside when he dies. Chloé's wearing a light shawl/cloak and a dark dress, neither of which can be seen particularly clearly. 0/10 this makes me sad and there aren't even any cute/pretty details.

Then there's Chloé's mourning outfit after her father's death. It's a simple black dress and a veil. I really like the veil honestly, it looks super pretty in my opinion and the dress isn't bad either, I like the detail on the collar and the little white ruffles at the sleeves. It's probably Chloé's simplest outfit and that makes it stand out as quite unique and interesting. Still, -100/10 this makes me even sadder than the last outfit I never want to see her wear anything like it again.

Next up the dress she was wearing when she met Ruthven! I love when she has ribbons tied around her neck so that the ends can billow dramatically behind her! Top notch for when she's being more threatening. The ribbon does lose points though for looking potentially scratchy/uncomfortable according to my sensibilities anyway. Of her outfits this looks like one of the warmest ones, potentially because she's carrying a really lovely shawl most of the time when wearing it. I like when she looks comfy and the shawl is very good for that! Maybe this is just a manifestation of my desire to wrap Chloé in a warm blanket? Anyway, the details on the bottom of her sleeves and around the white part at her shoulders are a nice touch that I'm really fond of. I like the puffiness of her sleeves too and the little flower on the front of her dress is cute. 8/10 great outfit, very pretty.

This one only appears in a few very small panels but nonetheless I am unreasonably fond of it. It shares some elements with the previous dress but is clearly a different outfit. The sleeves of this dress are pretty, I like any that have ruffles at the bottom and the neckline of her dress also pleases me. The shawl is nice and again plays on my desire to see her rugged up and safe. I am extremely in love with the little bow around Chloé's neck, it's incredibly appealing. 7/10 love this but can't see enough of it to rank it higher since these are the only panels it shows up in.

Next outfit! From the time she met Jeanne and one of the outfits she was most consistently drawn in! Point one in its favour, it's dark and I've already stated that I'm biased towards dark dresses on Chloé. Really I love everything about this to be honest. The necklace and choker combo is so pretty and it may be my favourite of Chloé's many neck accessories. I like the lacy collar of her dress and the bow with the rose in the middle too! I absolutely adore the sleeves on this dress, they just look so cool to me! The sleeves are potentially my favourite thing about this outfit ngl. I also think the dark cloak she wears on top of it briefly looks quite nice, it seems really soft and warm. Also there was a very brief flashback that I think involved this outfit (based on the sleeve) in which Chloé was wearing gloves and I don't know why but I'd really like to see her wearing gloves more clearly now. I just think she'd look cool. Overall this outfit is 10/10 perfect I am incredibly enamoured with it.

I've said I like darker colours but regardless I still think this one suits Chloé perfectly well and am not docking points for colour. First off, my favourite Chloé shawl, it's so big and flowy! Looks warm and is still very pretty. The skirt of this dress is really nice. I love all the bows and the way the layers are separated. It's beautiful! Chloé's choker is one of the ones I'm less fond of. I think I just dislike the beads over the top of the fabric? Not sure. It's still very pretty regardless. The sleeves on this dress are awesome too! I like how wide they are at the ends but also the beaded bits higher on the arm that match her choker. This outfit is very well coordinated and it looks amazing! 9/10 superb

Next we have an outfit that upfront is being judged more harshly because it is solely associated with Chloé in one of the worst states she's ever been in and therefore gives me bad vibes. I enjoy the cape attached to this dress, it's very dramatic and adds a cool flair to this. Also stands out because neither Chloé nor any other character has worn anything else quite like this to date as far as I can remember. I like the bow around her neck and all the bows running down her chest too. They're cute! But also they may be a bit much for me? Makes the front of her dress look very busy. The sleeves are top notch though. I love them. Some of the prettiest sleeves Chloé's worn. Not sure if this is just me but something about this dress doesn't feel Chloé enough. It looks good on her but somehow feels like it suits her personality less than some of her others. 7/10 gorgeous but the vibes throw me off.

Next up is pretty much all she's drawn in throughout the part of her backstory connected to JJ. The only instance in which she wore this without a cloak was when she was still putting it on to go help Jean-Jacques after he became the Beast but I haven't included that panel. She wore a few different cloaks with this outfit that looks pretty similar, though my favourite has to be the one with the ruffles on the hood. I just love it! Though the one with the soft looking hood and bigger bow is a close second. I enjoy the sleeves on this dress, the ribbons tied around them are cool and I'm partial to how they flutter around. The dress itself is pretty, I like the darker part of the skirt in the middle and the details at the bottom of the dress. The bodice of the dress is also nice, I appreciate the buttons running up it. I don't have any particularly strong feelings about Chloé's choker in this outfit but I like how it matches the rest of what she's wearing. A strong 8/10

We have three panels of Chloé in her nightgown and all of them make me sad. It looks cute and the detail around the collar part that I can see is nice. Unfortunately, this is hampered by the fact that Chloé was in a terrible state of mind while wearing it and there aren't any super clear pictures. If Mochijun ever drew Chloé in a nightgown again and she didn't look horribly depressed it would go up the rankings greatly because it would be very cute and I'm weak for Chloé looking cute. For now though 2/10 is the best I can give it because it upsets me.

Last up Chloé's main outfit. I love the ribbon at her neck that billows behind her dramatically and I'm equally enamoured with the big bows at her shoulders and waist. They're so pretty and they blend in with the rest of the dress seamlessly. The lacy parts around the sleeves, the bottom of the dress, the neckline, etc. are really cool, I like how they flutter around and they just generally look incredible. I love the skirt with the little roses and the slightly lighter coloured parts that break up the blackness. The rose on Chloé's chest is also very pretty, I adore how Mochijun coloured it in the volume 6 inner cover. This outfit also has the best Chloé shoes, I love her boots so much (no, I did not talk about the shoes in her other outfits. Yes, I could have. But these shoes are the only ones that matter!). The sleeves on this dress are top tier as well! I like how they flare out at the bottom and the bits at the shoulders. It's just so pretty! This outfit is stunning, jaw-dropping, the pinnacle, 100/10 I am in love with it. Is it boring to pick the main outfit as the best one? Maybe, but it simply is the best. Objectively. Because all my Chloé opinions are correct.

#vnc #vnc manga #chloé d'apchier #I've been feeling deranged about chloé lately so have this #vanitas no carte

[lokis-army-77]

If You Please

Chapter Sixteen

Bucky Barnes x Reader

Word Count: 4790

This is technically a reader insert but without the (y/n) and all that. She also has no name mentioned so feel free to imagine as you please.

Follow the reader through the events of the Captain America movies and experience her love for Bucky Barnes.

Warnings: Alcohol, abuse, angst I think.

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Masterlist

We had been living in Romania for two months since that first night, and it wasn't easy, especially for Bucky. The nightmares still plagued him and in the hopes of warding them off, he would stay up days on end, only to crash out in the quiet dark hours of the night. I would always wake up when he started to thrash about and shout, always ready to comfort him. I wish I could say they are getting better but that would be a lie.

I had finally gotten the mattress cleaned a few weeks into our stay and tried to get Bucky's to sleep on it, instead of the hard floor, but he refused, only giving a curt response saying that he brought it for me. If I fell asleep anywhere other than on that mattress, I would wake up on it later on.

Bucky wouldn’t stay away for as long now, only choosing to leave the apartment when we needed food or other necessities. I saw this as him building trust with me, which I was glad to have. He even started to ask me questions, writing everything I would tell him down into the small notebook I gave him a few weeks back. I knew writing things helped when Steve and I came out of the ice so I thought that it may help him to uncover some of his memories. From the questions he would ask me and the short stories he would sporadically recall, I knew something had to be working.

Today had been like any other day, we both went out to gather some things that we might need and then quickly made our way back to the apartment. I was lounging out on the raggedy loveseat we had brought back about three weeks ago, reading a book when my attention was pulled away from it by the sound of my name.

“Uh-huh?” I confirmed while flipping the page.

“Can you come here for a second?”

And that's when it clicked, Bucky said my name. “Wait a second, you just said my name,” I observed astonished, slamming the book closed and looking at him.

“I know, I need you to come here” he replied back, turning his body in the dining chair to look at me in annoyance.

“No, hang on. You’ve been calling me ‘hey’ for the past two months.” The only time he called me by my name was when he was deep in a nightmare, he never consciously said it.

“I-” he stopped to think. “I think I just remembered it, it just came out.”

“That's great, Buck. It’ll take a little time but I know soon you’ll be remembering things that I can't even recall.” He gave a faint smile at that. “Now what is it that you needed?”

“Uh.. never mind, I think I’ll ask you about it later.” He said, withdrawing back into his shell somewhat.

“Are you sure?” I asked. He didn’t answer, just turned back to scribble in his notebook. I gave him a soft look before opening my book back up and continued to read.

Later on that same week I was humming a song while cooking some eggs and bacon on the stove. Bucky was still somewhat peacefully asleep on his floor pallet. Carefully I grabbed the bright green spatula on my right and scooped up the crispy bacon from the pan to place it on two plates. After dumping most of the grease out I turned the heat to low and cracked a few eggs into the pan, scrambling them as soon as they started to turn white. Thankfully they didn’t take that long and I was able to scoop them up and plate them in just over a minute. I wiped my hands off on the small towel on the counter. Picking up both plates and their silverware, I quietly made my way to where Bucky was sleeping and knelt down. I sat the plate in my left hand on the floor beside his head and he slowly opened his eyes. Groaning, he lifted the heels of his palms to rub the sleep from them.

“Good morning Buck, I made your favorite.” I waited for him to sit up before handing him the plate in my right hand.

“What was that song you were humming earlier? It sounded familiar,” he said as he carefully took the plate of food. I grabbed mine off the floor and maneuvered myself so I was sitting on the ground beside him.

“It was ‘If You Please’, a Bing Crosby song. We used to dance to it during the war.” I watched him as he nodded while also shoveling eggs into his mouth.

“Oh,” he looked at his now empty fork, “I don’t remember how to dance.

An idea came to me as I picked up a piece of bacon. “What if, after we eat breakfast, I show you.” Then I bit into the piece of bacon, chewing as he looked at me with wide eyes, almost as if he thought I were being crazy.

“But-” He started.

“No buts, I think this will be good, it may help you remember if you can do something that you used to do, maybe it will help to jog your memory,” I said as I started on my eggs.

“Okay.” he let out, sounding very unsure.

After we had eaten and the dishes had been stacked into the sink, we both worked on moving the mattress and his cot out of the middle of the floor. When the floor was clear of anything that we could somehow trip over I dragged him into the middle and placed my hands onto his shoulders.

“Okay, now you put your hands on my waist,” I instructed. He hesitantly placed his hands a little high on my hips, I smiled at him before moving my hands down to correct his placement. “Let's move them down a little. There,” I said, as I brought my hands back up to his shoulders.

“Um, now what?” He questioned, looking everywhere but at me. I could see a tinge of pink rising to his cheeks.

“Now, I’ll sing the song and lead the dance, you just follow my movements,” I told him softly before straightening my back and hooking my arms around his neck. I then began to quietly sing the words to the song, humming at the parts where words were not needed.

The dance started off slow as Bucky looked at both of our feet and copied each step that I took. He took small unconfident steps, but he was still as graceful as he was in the past. Looking up at his face I noticed how concentrated he was. His brow was pulled in tight, looking almost like he was angry, and the very tip of his tongue was visible through his lips as he bit down on it.

We danced until I was finished with the song, but Bucky kept going. I felt the shift of when he took control of the dance and I was no longer leading him. His left hand removed itself from my waist and up to grab my right one from around his neck. His right hand wrapped around my waist, pulling me closer to him. My heart sped up a little at this, we haven't been this close in years and it almost felt like the forest time we went dancing together.

I started to hum another slow song as Bucky led me around the living room, through a series of spins. At some point, my head came to rest on his chest while my left arm wrapped itself under his as we held each other close. His chin was barely resting on the top of my head.

“Thank you.” I heard him barely whisper. I faltered in my steps and hummed, but he kept me from tripping.

“What are you thanking me for?”

“Just- thank you for helping me remember some of the good things.” he choked out. “This,” he moves his head to reference what we were doing, “this has helped. I don’t remember it all, but flashes of us dancing are coming to mind. There’s someone with you in a stunning blue dress in a bar somewhere, I think it’s in London, I could be remembering wrong.”

I smiled widely, knowing exactly what he was remembering. “You're right, it was London. That was right after we found you-” I trailed off, realizing that if I said more about finding him in the HYDRA base it might ruin the moment.

The dancing slowed until we were just standing in the middle of the room completely still. Bucky coughed awkwardly and then let me go before walking over to the dining table and snatching up his backpack. “I’m- I’m uh going- out. I’ll be back in a while.” He let out before quickly rushing to the front door and down the stairs. I watched after him with a woeful look.

It had been almost six hours since Bucky had left and the apartment was getting more boring by the minute. I had already put the mattress and Bucky’s pallet back in their spots, I had cleaned and even showered. When I realized he wasn’t going to be home any time soon, I decided to go on a run. Something I hadn’t done in a while.

Bucky and I had decided that until the news of what had happened with SHIELD and the fact that all of their secrets were out in the open, including ones that had both of us included in them, died down, we probably both shouldn't leave the apartment at the same time. That way it would be less likely for us to be spotted.

It had only been two months but it had been a while since I had seen any news or heard any talk of us or the events in January. So I quickly got dressed in some warm running clothes and a blue beanie to keep my hair hidden, in hopes that it would help keep people from recognizing me.

Then I was off, bounding down the several flights of stairs and out the side door of the very old apartment building. It was almost one-thirty and the streets were busy, so I wasn’t able to go at full sprint. But the average run was wonderful. The cool air hitting my face was just what I had needed after being cooped up all day.

I had only been running for maybe twenty or thirty minutes when I started to feel the hairs on the back of my neck start to stand and goosebumps started to cover my arms. Nothing ever crossed my mind other than it being super cold out, so I paid no attention to it. Running some more I came to a long dark alleyway between several tall buildings. Right as I turned off of the sidewalk and into the alley I felt something grab my hand.

I turned in surprise, swinging my free arm to try and take out whoever had placed their hands on me. The attempted punch was futile as that hand was caught by a large gray metal hand. Looking up at the person, I recognized Bucky. His hood was up over his ball cap and his hair was dangling in his face.

“Oh, it's just you,” I let out a sigh of relief. I tried to take my hands out of his grasp but he only held on tighter.

“What the hell are you doing out here?” he almost yelled.

“I went on a run because I was bored and alone.”

“We agreed to not go out at the same time.” He was looking at me furiously and I swore if he were any madder, smoke would be billowing from his ears.

“I’m sorry but you have been gone for six hours.”

“I came back and you weren't there. I looked everywhere and then I spotted you, running.” He softened for a second.

“It’s okay, I wasn’t leaving you. I just needed to get out of there for a while. I was being careful, nothing would have happened.” I smiled up at him, but it quickly fell when turned away from me quickly.

“YOU DON’T KNOW THAT,” he bellowed out, slamming his metal hand into the bricks right next to us. I flinched at that as old memories flashed behind my eyes. “You don’t know that,” he said more calmly. He reached out for my hand and started to lead me back to the apartment. “Come on, let's get off the street.” I just followed him silently.

After getting back to the apartment, I went straight into the bathroom without a word and started running the water for a shower. When the water was scalding hot I took my clothes off and stepped in. The water hit my chest and neck before I turned around to wet my hair. I stood under the running water for what felt like forever before I felt my eyes start to burn and tears started to spring out and mix with the shower water.

I hated how I felt at the moment like I was back to being the helpless little kid that I used to be. Huddled under the dining room table, clinging onto Steve as I cried. I hadn’t had the slightest relapse in years and just the way that Bucky had yelled and slammed into the wall had flung back to when I was five.

I slowly washed myself off and continued to let the water rush over me until it began to run cold. When I finally got the tears to stop flowing, I turned the water off and stepped out, grabbing one of the towels off of the rack and drying off. I dressed in a sweater and a pair of sweatpants I had grabbed before coming into the bathroom. After that, I wrapped the towel I had used around my wet hair and then stepped out into the cold air of the living area.

I slowly padded my way to the fridge, I paid no mind to Bucky, who was sitting across the love seat. Opening the fridge door I rummaged through what we had before settling on grabbing the milk container. I sat it on the counter beside me as I reached above me to grab the box of half-empty cereal from the top of the fridge. Then I went over to the sink to wash one of the two bowls we had before making my dinner.

When I had finally finished making my bowl of cereal, I noticed it getting darker, which made me realize the earlier event had drained me more than I thought.

Settling down into the mattress, I laid on my side and gathered the extra length of the blanket into my arms. Bucky was fast asleep behind me on his pallet and pretty soon I fell asleep as well.

I opened my eyes to the sun shining straight into them. I could hear loud banging noises coming through the door of the tiny room I was in. I realized quickly that it was my childhood room back in New York. Steadily I flung the covers off of me and slid myself off the bed and onto the ground. Looking over at the mirror next to the bed I noticed I was a child again, I paid it no mind as I fixed my nightgown before walking to the door of my room. Gently I reached up to grab hold of the knob and twisted. As soon as the door was open, the banging sounds became louder. Sticking my head out into the hall I looked down to the kitchen where the noise was coming from before completely stepping out of my room.

Tentatively I walked down the hall to the barely closed kitchen door. Before I could place my hand on the door to push it open, Steve stopped me. He bent down to my height and looked me in the eyes, shaking his head. I didn’t really understand what he was trying to convey so I rushed forward past him and into the kitchen, only to stop short. There, laid out in the middle of the kitchen floor was our mother with blood dripping down her face onto the wooden floor. Father stood over her with a bottle in one hand and blood covering his other fist. My heart pounded as I ran to my mother's side, crying loudly. As I came to her side I felt a large hand snatch my upper arm and a second later I was flying into one of the kitchen chairs. The tears came faster after that. They blurred my vision so much that I hadn't noticed Steve coming into the kitchen as well until he was helping me sit up.

“Shh, it’s okay, let's hurry and get back to bed.” He tried lifting me to my feet, but I fought.

“Mommy,” I cried. Escaping from Steve's hold I crawled my way back to her. And that's when I felt the hand slapping my face.

“Oh stop crying. You aren’t a baby.” I heard my father say as I brought my hands up to cup the side of my face and just cried more. He didn’t like this so in a fit of anger he threw his beer bottle across the room and into the wall. It shattered into hundreds of tiny brown glass pieces. Then he took his belt off and wrapped the buckled end of it around his hand and then headed straight for me. I blurted out of his way when he took his first steps towards me, but soon I was backed up into a corner. “Come here, so I can give you a whooping for not listing.”

“No Daddy please.” I cried harder as he came closer. That’s when Steve ran in between us.

“Dad stop, she's only five.”

“You get out of the way Steve or I’ll give you one too.” He took another step forward but Steve stood still. Through my tears, I could see Father's eyes becoming darker with anger at each passing second. When Steve still didn’t move out of his way after the next few steps, he started swinging the belt, catching Steve violently on the left cheek then back again across his right arm and around to his back. The force of the blow knocked him away just long enough for Father to reach me in the corner and take me up and start walking. The pain I felt all around my body from the sting of the belt was excruciating. I cried even more which in turn made Father angrier.

I let out a relieved sob when Mother grabbed hold of the hand that was wielding the belt, halting the onslaught of whips.

“Joseph, stop it, please. They’re both just children, leave them out of this.” she pleaded with him, which only made him turn back to beating her. I ran to hide under the table, soon after that Steve came to hide with me. I calmed my tears but I was left numb, the only thing I could hear were the sounds of Father hurting Mother. And then finally they stopped. Slowly crawling out from under the table we were met with the swollen, bloodied face of our Mother and Father was nowhere to be found.

“It’s okay children, he’s gone to bed now,” she said calmly as I made my way into her lap.

“Mom, why did you get back up?” I heard Steve ask shakily.

“Because, and both of you listen well because you always get back up. No matter how much it hurts, you stand up. Stand up for yourself, for those weaker and even stronger than you, and for each other.” She said as she gently rubbed my back.

I woke up with a start after that. Chest heaving for air, sweat covering every inch of my body, despite the room being freezing cold. There was shuffling behind me and then something cold was placed on my shoulder, I flinched away from it and turned around quickly, fear clouding my vision. I relaxed when I noticed that it was only Bucky. Letting out a shaky breath I let the dam of tears break away.

Bucky hesitantly scooted closer to where I was sitting and gently, but hesitantly, placed both his hands on the upper part of my arms and rubbed up and down.

“Are you okay? You were screaming in your sleep and then you just shot up out of nowhere,” he asked, concern dripping from his words.

“I’m okay now,” I replied shakily. “It was just a bad dream.”

“Do you- do you want to talk about it?”

I nodded slightly, knowing it would be best to get it off my chest than to keep what had happened bottled up. So for the next little while, I related to Bucky what had happened in my dream and told him bits and pieces of the abuse that had happened in my childhood before my father passed away in nineteen twenty-six.

“I’ve been in violent situations before and was fine, like in the world war, but when you slammed your hand into the wall today it triggered something in me that hadn't been triggered in a very long time,” I said, wiping the now drying tears from my cheeks. After the words left my mouth I felt Bucky slowly remove himself from his spot on my mattress and back onto the floor. “Thanks for listening, we should go back to bed now,” I yawned.

“Good night.” He whispered.

I reached down my bed to grab at the covers that were bunched up on the floor. Dragging them up, I laid back down as I covered myself with them. “Good night,” I whispered back to him. I closed my eyes, but I never did go back to sleep.

Over the next few days, after I had had the nightmare, I saw Bucky less and less. He would avoid me all day, the only time he was ever really directly next to me was when we would lay down for bed. I honestly had no clue as to why he was so diligently keeping me at a distance, but it was starting to worry me a bit. We had worked so hard to get to the place we were and now it was falling away.

He had left early in the morning like he had been but when he came home I had made a peace offering of sorts, hoping that food would be the way to stop avoiding me. I had spent quite a while flipping through a Romanian cookbook trying to figure out what I was going to make for dinner before settling on creamed chicken, which looked a lot more appetizing than it sounded.

I gathered all the ingredients I would need and then got to work. While the oven was preheating I chopped all the vegetables and placed them in a large dutch oven along with the chicken. After that I covered it with the lid and placed it in the bottom rack of the oven, I left it there for an hour.

While the vegetables and chicken were cooking slowly, I pan-cooked the mushrooms I had chopped earlier until they were nice and browned. This didn’t take long so when I had finished with the mushrooms, I sat down to read while I waited on the food in the oven to finish.

After the hour was up I took the chicken and vegetables out of the oven and poured a mixture of two cups of cream and a few tablespoons of flowers into the pot, along with the mushrooms from before and a tablespoon of paprika. I mixed it up a little with my wooden spoon to make sure everything was well incorporated, then I stuck the lid back on and placed the pot back in the oven for another thirty minutes.

When the thirty minutes were up, I took the food out of the coven and turned it off. I spooned some of the chicken and creamy broth into two separate bowls just as Buckey walked through the door. I looked up and smiled at him as he sat his backpack down on the dining table.

“Hey, I’m glad you got here when you did. I just finished making dinner, but I’ll only let you have it if you promise to tell me why you keep avoiding me.” I said jokingly as I walked to place our bowls down on the table. He just looked at me then turned, heading into the bathroom.

Seconds later I heard the shower turn on and I let out a huff. I sat down and ate my serving of food while I waited on him to finish up in the bathroom. It felt like hours before he finally opened the door. I abruptly stood up from my spot on the dining chair, determined to get some sort of answer from him.

“Bucky, why do you keep avoiding me?” My question was met with silence as he strode his way to his pallet and laid down like he was going to bed, even though it wasn’t even seven yet. “Bucky, please answer me. It’s been almost a week”. I paced my way to stand directly behind him, he turned his back to me. I bent down and slowly placed my hand on his arm. He jerked it away from me and scooted away.

“Don’t touch me.” He let out in almost a warning tone.

“Okay, I won’t, but I just want to know why you’re ignoring my existence completely.” I backed away from him. “I deserve even the smallest of explanations.” But still, nothing came. I stood up then and went back to the table to pick up my empty bowl and his full one and headed over to the kitchen. I dumped the contents of Bucky's bowl back into the pot and then covered the lid so I could place it in the fridge to eat later.

“Dinner’s in the fridge whenever you decide you want some.” I paused for a second, “Can you at least say something?”

He let out an exasperated breath, shooting up to look at me. “Fine you want to know why I’m avoiding you, then here it is. You shouldn’t have followed me here. I’m dangerous, I could hurt you or anyone else for that matter. The other day was testament enough of that. So just stay away from me.”

I stood there silently, a little confused by his words. “Bucky you could never hurt me, I know you wouldn’t.”

“Maybe not knowingly, but I could. Like you said, I scared you the other day, made you remember things your father did. It wasn’t physical but I still hurt you.”

“So that's why you were avoiding me? Because you thought that I was scared of you? Bucky I would never be scared of you, you’ve never given me a reason to be. All I said was that it triggered something, I was caught off guard. Someone else could have easily been the one to trigger it instead of you.” I said as I made my way back over to him.

“You don’t know that. You don't know that I wouldn’t hurt you.” He said shakily.

“Yes I do, Buck. I know you wouldn't, because two months ago when you were the Winter Soldier, you had plenty of chances to finish me off, to hurt me, and you didn’t. I know you, and I know you would never seriously hurt me. There is some part of your past still alive in you that's why you’re afraid you’ll hurt me now and that's why you wouldn't hurt me then.” I assured him as I tentatively placed my hand on his and gripped it tight. “I trust you Bucky, whether you trust yourself or not.”

His head bent down to look at our hands and then he looked back at me, his lips twitching into an almost unnoticeable smile. I felt him grip my hand tightly before letting it go. “I think I’ll take some of that chicken now,” he said as he heaved himself up off the floor.

I backed away up onto the loveseat behind me in order to let him pass by me. I said nothing as I picked up my book from the cushion beside me and started to read where I had left off earlier in the day.

Authors note: If you are confused, Steve's father was an abuser in the comics so that's what's going on. I don't think he was one in the MCU, but the MCU version died in WW1 right after Steve was born, so I added the comic version to fit in with the timeline of Reader's birth and some other plot stuff for this chapter.

Tag List: @ginger-swag-rapunzel @underc0vercryptid-reads @geek-and-proud @intothesoul @leyannrae @starkleila @andy-is-gay

#james buchanan barnes #bucky x y/n #bucky barnes #bucky x reader #bucky x female reader #bucky fic #bucky fanfic #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x rogers!reader #winter solider x reader #marvel fic #marvel fanfiction

[muffinrecord]

Who to Roll For?

Here’s a dumb post if you’re wondering who to roll for in the upcoming banner. Please do further research too!! Don’t just base it on my half-assed crap ;_;

Also please feel free to correct me if I get something wrong!

First off, make a decision on if you want to choose a character for gameplay or because you love them. BOTH ARE EQUALLY VALID. I don’t think I need to help a person pick a favorite character, so I’m going to give advice based on gameplay.

Available characters:

Madoka Kaname

Madoka (Haregi ver)

Mami Tomoe

Mami (Holy ver)

Mami (Swimsuit ver)

Kyoko Sakura

Kyoko (Swimsuit ver)

Sayaka Miki

Sayaka (Haregi ver)

Cool Homura

Homura (Swimsuit)

Generic advice: 

Look at who you have already. Getting more slots for a character is always a good thing! If you want to fill in missing gaps, look at your elemental lineups and see what you’re missing. Not enough Flame? Pick a Kyoko, ect. Also, look at your lineups for strategy and see what you’re missing too. Madoka will be great for Magia teams, Mami is good for Bind cheese, Kyoko is good for blastin’, ect! If you don’t have everyone, consider your future plans with saving. Will you be trying to get one of these limited girls later? If not, then choose an unlimited, so that if you get spooked you can at least increase the girl’s slots. If you are considering rolling for someone in the future, then go ahead and get a copy of them ahead of time to make it easier on yourself!

Specific Character Advice:

Madoka Kaname: Extremely good for Magia teams. She’s still one of the best (I think?) for getting people to 100 MP and beyond and her light status makes her really versatile. I still think that Madoka is one of the best choices for new players. She’s not going to carry you in damage though, so keep that in mind! Additionally, personally, I find that Double Doka cheese isn’t really needed as much as it was on NA due to SE on other characters making other options easier to work through. Additionally, I don’t think Madoka is as necessary these days as she was in NA either-- characters like Mikage and the easily accessible Kako have filled Madoka’s niche a bit.

One slot isn’t great, but it’s enough for her to use her Accele Draw personal memoria at least, so that’s nice.

Haregi Madoka: She’s been powercrept by other characters in the game. She’s a support and will deal more damage than Regular Madoka, but she also doesn’t deal as much damage as an actual attacker. A lot of her support is based around preventing damage (Attack Down, Darkness) which can be pretty nice-- healing is good, but preventing damage is also great. But otherwise, I feel like regular Madoka is better than Haregi Madoka.

With regard to slots, Supports are kinda similar to tanks in that you want them ideally to have more than one slot. This is because they can load up on active memoria and really take advantage of that skill quicken passive from spirit enhancement they can get. 

Mami Tomoe: She’s good imo, but she’s not as much a must-have like she was on NA, because a lot of characters can bind/charm/stun the enemy now through connects. As a Forest type she does a lot of good magia damage and she has a great amount of Attack. Her disks can work for or against her-- on Magia teams she’s good, but for general attacking maybe not so much. Don’t forget her magia will debuff herself! 

She’s... fine at one slot, but more is always better. She’s really squishy though so keep that in mind-- if bind doesn’t work, then she’s fragile.

Holy Mami: Her disks make her sort of charge team/blast team oriented. She does have a lot of MP gain up nodes + mp regen (at 12mp per turn??), so she can magia, although that sort of focus on her SE is a little weird. Her magia itself is really confusing?? IMO Swimsuit Mami is a better forest unit if you have to pick a limited.

She’s fine at one slot, but still-- more is better.

Swimsuit Mami: One of the best Forest units in the game, and she’s going to be really good for the upcoming Kimochi too. Her Spirit Enhancement, Magia, and Connect are all pretty good. She has the highest attack of the three Mamis available, and she has MP Regen per turn, letting her get to magia quickly-- which is good, because she gives herself Magia Damage Up when she does so.

One slot isn’t great, but I don’t think she suffers as much as other characters do on this list for it. Keep in mind that she’ll probably be a lot better if you could get her to two slots at least.

Kyoko Sakura: One of the OG Blast gorillas, Kyoko is great for any sort of blasting business. Interestingly, she’s kind of more tanky than Swimsuit Kyoko? Regular Kyoko gives Damage Cut on her connect, while Swim Kyoko gives Attack Up, and regular Kyoko has more Defense too. She’s going to be excellent for farming stuff if you want to use Blast, though blast is sort of out of the meta when it comes to hard content.

It’s always good to have more memo slots, but Kyoko is pretty good for farming even at one. If you have Ranka and are really pressed for options here, you can skip her if you like.

Swimsuit Kyoko: Kyoko and Swim Kyoko both have very similar SE-- in fact, it’s the same with some different percentages. Swim Kyoko has a higher evade chance at 20%, while regular Kyoko has a higher Anti-Evade at 45%. Swim Kyoko has a weaker active SE in my opinion (it gives lower blast damage up but also magia damage up?); however swim kyoko has a much better connect and waaaay better attack stats. She’s very fragile though! Like regular Kyoko, she’s going to be excellent for farming stuff with blast but not as good for actual hard content.

I’d say Swim Kyoko is prob the best to have here at one memo slot. She just has super high attack and can make up for the lack of second passive slot.

Sayaka Miki: Unless you have Sayaka at a slot or two already, I’d skip her for consideration. She’s sort of... eh? Some folks have made good tactics of using Attack Up when max health memoria + Sayaka’s HP Regen, but that depends on you having good Attack Up when max health memoria in the first place. As a tank she’s great, but as a damage dealer... meh.

She suffers the most here from having one slot. She’s a tank, and I still think tanks benefit from having three slots, even considering Spirit Enhancement. It’s true that SE will make up for a lack of memoria slots, but you also have to consider that the content you’re facing is going to be harder in antipcation of SE too.

Haregi Sayaka: She’s not in the meta, and suffers from a few flaws but she’s also very cool. Tanks generally want AACCB (especially these days) so that they can get to magia quickly and help support their team-- Haregi Sayaka has ABBCC though, which is more attack-ish focused. Despite being a defense type she actually has decent enough ATK stats. Her connect gives Defense Pierce along with other stuff, which makes her a bit rare and REALLY helpful for some hard challenges. As a tank she does kind of suffer a bit when it comes to drawing aggro, but she’s also very sturdy, especially with her 100% Regen HP SE Active.

The number of slots here depends-- if you just want a good attacker, then she’s better than regular Sayaka and can work with one slot. However, as a tank you’d want more slots because her magia/doppel/active SE does not give her a provoke/guardian. 

Cool Homura: She’s a decent blast gorilla. She’s not as good as Ashley, but she’s cool Homura, so I mean, she’s still pretty cool, right? If you don’t have any elemental neutral blast gorillas (aka light, dark, void), then Cool Homu is a good choice. Her Spirit Enhancement kind of lets her down though compared to other characters-- why does she only have one blast damage up node??? Also, her magia damages all enemies while her doppel damages random ones, for some reason. But overall, I mean-- it’s cool homura. Blast isn’t meta atm, but she should be good for farming and maybe Mirrors?

Like Kyoko and Swim Kyoko, she’s probably one of the better options to have at one slot due to her blast nature.

Swimsuit Homura: IMO Swimsuit Homura is a much better version of Moemura. She has EXCELLENT attack at 11k (cool homura has 400 more attack than her at 11.4k to put it in perspective), a better type than moemura (Support versus Magia), and her active SE skill is better too. Honestly so is her connect-- it feels like a better improvement over the old one because she gives Attack Up + Skill Seal with the evade (instead of Magia Damage Up). She basically feels like an updated, more powerful-version with much better disks. However, when compared to other limited light characters, she falls a bit short (Sakurako Hiiragi is a much better unit than SwimHomura is).

She’s not great at one slot, but she’s not as bad as some people on this list. 

#Muffin Record #Magia Record #PMMM 10th Anniversary #Long Post

[y2fandom]

Spanish. — Diego Hargreeves

Summary: Diego decides to help (Y/N) after seeing her struggle with Spanish at the library.

Word Count: 1.9K

A/N: Gosh it's been like, a million years since I wrote something pls go easy on me but feel free to tell me what you think feedback is always welcomed! (Also i lowkey based this of Sunrise from In The Heights so listen to it if you wanna)

I tried adding a read more but i don't have a computer so,,, yeah don't hate me if you come across this in your dash

—

Diego didn't frequent the library. He was honestly more of an action person than a sit-down-for-hours-reading person but he'd been stuck on a case and figured a little bit of background information wouldn't hurt. He'd come to find out not everything could be found out interrogating people on shady alleys. 

He just needed to use the computers, there was a very slim chance books would have the information he needed.

Diego went to turn on the machine when something stopped him. 

A groan. A deep and miserable groan followed by what sounded like thuds against wood.

Diego furrowed his eyebrows. He wouldn't have really minded if the noise hadn't come from directly in front of him. He stood up from the uncomfortable library chair to peer over the computer. 

There was a table on the other side and a lady had her forehead pressed against the wood. Diego would've thought she was asleep if he didn't witness with his own two eyes how she resumed banging her head against the table. It was a wonder how her book stayed propped while the furniture moved.

It wasn't his business, but he'd caught the cover of the book by mere chance. Spanish 101.

"¿Necesitas ayuda?" What was he doing? He just needed some information and that was it, yet here he was talking to a stranger. Selfish motivations, he told himself, I only want her to stop the noise so I can concentrate.

The lady rose her head. Her hair was disheveled from her previous attempts at becoming one with the table. She looked cute, if not a bit confused. She looked at Diego. 

He repeated his question. 

She nodded slowly. "Yeah, I– sí."

Diego approached her table, slightly cringing to himself at how he looked. He hadn't had a good night's sleep in at least a week and he was dressed in all black. Not exactly a comforting sight.

"Name's Diego," he said, suddenly feeling awkward as she glanced up at him, "I saw you struggling with Spanish?" 

She nodded, a shy smile creeping on her face. "I'm (Y/N), sorry if i disturbed you with my suffering, I know it's a library and you expect silence-"

Diego chuckled. "What made you want to learn Spanish?" 

"I just wanted to learn a new language I figured it would be useful…" she trailed off, before adding under her breath, "if only it wasn't this hard."

Diego smiled. "I could help you, it's my mother tongue," or it would be, he added in his mind.

(Y/N) perked up at his suggestion. "You would do that?" 

Diego nodded, ignoring the thoughts about work and information. He could afford to help someone who needed him. Work could wait. 

She motioned for him to sit down.

"What are you having trouble with?" 

(Y/N) let out a humorless laugh. "Just about everything really."

"Do you know how to introduce yourself?" 

She bit her lip for a second before nodding, "Mi nombre es (Y/N), uh, soy (age)-" 

"Tengo."

"Right, tengo (age) años, me gusto aprender-"

"Me gusta."

She nodded, surprising Diego. He'd expected her to be annoyed or to ask for a different method.  Instead, she took his corrections in stride, applying them without any protest. "Me gusta aprender y conocer nuevas personas," 

Diego nodded. "You're very good, actually."

A pinkish tone dusted her cheeks. "You think so? I feel like I still have a long way to go and vocab is so hard-" 

"I'm a little busy right now," the way she seemed to deflate at that made him feel a pang of guilt, "but i can help you study some other time?" 

She brightened up again at the suggestion.  "Yes! That would be perfect!" 

"Do you have a number?" 

She handed him a small piece of paper after writing in it. "Call me when you can Diego." 

《 . . . 》

“No English?” 

Diego nodded. He was trying to stay serious but her shocked expression made the corners of his mouth twitch. “No ingles.” 

She whined. “But–” The look he gave her made her reconsider her wording, “pero Diego.” 

“No buts.” He gave her a look. “The best way to learn is to practice.” 

“Apesta,” she huffed. 

“Esto apesta.” he corrected, a smug smile in his face in response to her pout. 

“Bueno,” She sighed after a small silence, “I won't change your mind, right?” 

“¿Qué?”

“I won't-”

“No hablo inglés,” he deadpanned.

(Y/N) glared at him. “Tú hablas inglés." 

He smiled at her, proud that he didn't need to correct her. “Si hablo inglés.” 

“Tú eres el peor," she groaned. And he was the worst, but he didn't care if he got to make her smile and learn.

“You still like me that way,” he teased. 

Her cheeks tinted a lovely shade of pink but before he could comment on it her eyes gained a determined glint. "Quiz me." 

Diego ignored her blatant disrespect of the rules he'd set. "Are you ready?"

(Y/N) nodded. "Creo." 

"Esquina?"

"Corner."

"Tienda?" 

"Store."

"Bombilla?"

"Lightbulb."

"Are you sure?" 

She bit her lip, but nodded anyways. "I'm sure."

Diego smiled. "All correct."

(Y/N) mirrored him and smiled also, standing up in a swift motion. Yet whatever she had planned on doing was stopped by her phone ringing.

She gave him a quick glance before picking up. A few affirmative hums later she set her phone down. (Y/N)’s apologetic smile made his heart sink.

“Tengo que ir.” She seemed reluctant and it made Diego wish he had the words to convince her to stay. Instead, he said:

“Irme." 

(Y/N) huffed, but the smile threatened to return to her face. “See you later, Diego." 

And then she hugged him. Diego felt breathless for a second. She had never hugged him but she was doing it now. It was like nothing he'd ever felt before. She was warm and smelled so sweet it made him want to never let go. Then, too soon it was over. (Y/N) pulled away taking the warmth with her.

She smiled up at him. “Hasta luego, Diego.” 

Diego watched her walk away.  wondering how she had managed to take with her the warmth of the embrace but not the fluttering feeling on his stomach.

《 . . . 》 

The sound of books being set on the table made Diego snap his head up. (Y/N) was wearing the biggest smile he'd seen on her and it made his stomach flutter. 

"Hola Diego," she said, her voice sweeter and lighter than usual. Every syllable made his heart do somersaults. 

"Hey."

"I have good news," she sing-songed, setting herself on the chair across him, "buenas noticias." 

Diego nodded, letting her continue. 

"He asked me out," she whisper-yelled, her eyes shining. 

Being the receiver of that look full of warmth didn't help Diego; he froze. "Wuh..?" 

(Y/N) pretended to hit her head. "Cierto," she said, "Remember I told you I had joined a class? To practice Spanish even more?" 

Diego nodded, he'd felt slightly hurt when she had announced it. It felt like he wasn't enough. But instead of saying that Diego had smirked and told her she had taken long enough. 

"Ok so, there's this guy in class, who I'm really into, his name is Marcus." The way she breathed his name felt like he was being stabbed with his own knives. "He's one of the most advanced people in the class and kind of the reason why I've wanted to improve so much in these last few weeks…" 

Diego felt like she'd just punched him on the gut. All this time a small part of him had harbored the hope she was doing so good because he was teaching her, not because she was pushing herself to be good for someone else. He looked down to his coffee before nodding at her again. 

"And now he's invited me on a date," she squealed, her smile growing bigger, "una cita." 

He nodded again. "That's, uh, that's really cool." 

Her smile softened. "¿Eres bien?"

"Estas." He corrected teasingly. Diego nodded. "Estoy cansado. I've been, uh, working late this last few days." 

Her mouth parted in a "o" shape, the same way it did any time he mentioned his vigilante work. (Y/N) looked at him with a serious gentleness that reminded him of how Grace looked at him when he was younger. "You need to take better care of yourself, Diego, please." 

How could he say no to her pleading eyes? Diego nodded. Getting ready to start their study session when his radio made a hissing noise. He glanced to (Y/N) and found her already looking at him. She nodded him to go. 

“It's important.” she reassured him in a hasty hug. "We can study later, go save em." 

He wanted to hate the way her voice made him giddy, he wanted to hate how he did a better job this time to make her proud of him, he wanted to hate that she had a date; but he couldn't. Diego was happy for her.

《 . . . 》

Diego waited in the agreed meeting spot. He cringed at himself at how fast he'd arrived, (Y/N) wasn't even there yet. He wanted to convince himself he wasn't far from the area but in reality, it was just that something seemed off. (Y/N)s voice had wavered a little when she'd called. 

The sound of a parking car caught his attention and he looked at it until someone came out of it. (Y/N).

His heart’s first instinct was to leap and his stomach burst in a million butterflies. She looked stunning. Diego firmly believed she looked good in anything but the way her outfit made her look almost made his jaw touch the ground. That was before he noticed her expression.

She smiled sadly at him, her watery eyes reflecting the lights of the street. It was almost like she could see him realize. 

“Hey.” 

“Are you okay?” Diego asked, concern thickly coating his tone.

(Y/N) went to nod but stopped herself. She opened her mouth and then closed it again.

Diego reached for her, engulfing her in a hug. “You can tell me."

(Y/N) was silent for a second and then, "how do you say pain?" 

Diego felt like she had a hand on his heart and she was slowly squeezing. "Dolor." 

"Tonight?"

"Esta noche."

She hesitated. "Stood up?"

Anger started to simmer underneath Diego's skin. "Plantada?" 

(Y/N) nodded against his chest. She look him in the eyes. the way the streetlight caught her tears made all the anger evaporate and be replaced by anguish. Who could've done something so rude to her?

She must've been able to read his expression because she said, "Marcus, he didn't show up." 

"I'm sorry, (Y/N)."

She laughed a little but there was no mirth behind the sound. "It's okay, it's not your fault." She sniffed, not bothering to pretend she wasn't crying. "It's lame but it hurts because I wanted him to love me—"

"Perhaps I do…"

Her eyes widened. "Diego?"

"Lo siento, (Y/N). I have feelings for you and i know it's not the time but I just wanted to tell you because it hurts seeing you feel unloved and-"

And she kissed him. Just a small, almost-on-the-lips-but-not-quite peck. (Y/N) giggled at his shocked face. 

"I like you, Diego."

Diego stuttered trying to find the right words to express what he was feeling at the moment. Nothing seemed to come out. Instead, he leaned over her and kissed her forehead. 

"It's guh-getting cold, let's get you home."

#diego hargreeves x reader #tua x reader #diego x reader #diego tua x reader #the umbrella academy x reader #number 2 x reader #diego hargreeves #diego tua #tua #the umbrella academy #x reader

[countessofbiscuit]

all this devotion

Shaak Ti/Rancor Squad, Mature, 2600 words, 1/2 chapters . . .

Three things are certain in life: death, the Force, and the insistence of a togruta’s heat. Stationed on Kamino, Shaak Ti can now add rain and the dedication of ARC troopers to that list. 

View all tags/warnings and read on Ao3 or find chapter 1 below the cut.

“Are you alright, General?”

The map on the viewscreen expanded. Shaak Ti stared at the dispersal of the Second Army, pointedly, more bothered than she cared to admit by how closely Blitz had chosen to stand. “Yes, Commander, quite,” she lied.

Blitz was one of the more solicitous Alphas, all of whom married intuition with professional pride in a way that said they wouldn’t want the Force even were it offered. He did not accept this untruth. “Lama Su called you mistress three times. You didn’t correct him.”

“There are battles enough, some days,” Shaak Ti said. Tackling the Prime Minister’s insistence on outdated titles was not one for today.

“And you never shy from any.” Blitz hadn’t moved, but somehow his presence grew with his confidence in being right. “You’re very hot.”

The bottom of Shaak Ti’s stomach puddled into her groin. Her stripes flushed. It was the worst thing he could have said. “Excuse me?” she demanded, finally turning to face him.

“Infrared doesn’t lie, sir.”

Shaak Ti felt incredibly exposed. Unfairly observed. She swallowed the impulse to tell him not to flag her with his senors, just as Commander Colt had firmly requested her not to flag them with the Force. Blitz was trying to be helpful. Kamino was their home, their area of responsibility. And although she was trying to be helpful, too, she was an interloper, a stranger whose character and peculiarities needed to be roundly understood in order for them to do their jobs.

And her body was candid.

It was determined to make an honest togruta out of Shaak Ti. She was more than warm. The burn was beginning. The kindling was there, dry and licked into flame by pheromones. The best air-scrubbers in the galaxy couldn’t hide some things from a predatory plains species. She’d smelt the lust on them for weeks, here in this bleached city where sterility was an art form, where nature was scoured clean. But where virility could not be controlled. Her arrival had caused a flurry of activity among the clone staff that had nothing to do with the presence of a Jedi or an outsider in their midst. It was in the unreserved awe of their deep eyes. In the damp patches on their training blacks. In the lingering ache in their wrists. Shaak Ti’s many senses had discerned it all.

Her heat was upon her, and it was inflamed. And she wasn’t in the Temple, anymore.

“Alright. I will own it.” She lowered her voice. “I’m not well, and I'll be even worse for the next day or two.”

Blitz’s helmet canted slightly to the left. He stepped even closer. “What’s wrong?”

How much I want to bite you. “That’s personal, Commander.”

“With respect, sir, we’re in a heightened state of readiness, and anything that may compromise your health — ”

“Command devolves the same.”

“If you expect to be incapacitated in any way, Commander Colt should be informed.”

Oh, please don’t name him, too. An idea was germinating in Shaak Ti’s mind, rooted in biology and matriarchal instincts — and in the kindness the command cadre had shown her when she’d stepped off that shuttle, Geonosian dust still clinging to her robes. Commanders Colt, Blitz, and Havoc had removed their helmets unbidden, in unison. They were the first fresh clone faces she’d seen, not bloodied or twisted in agony. And they were very handsome.

On Shili, she would’ve had a harem to protect and cherish and serve. And who would have served her in turn —

She banished the thought before she flared whiter in Blitz’s HUD.

The Council had sent her here that she might grow confident in her ability to teach and nurture success once again. To oversee a programme she feared rife with ethical abuse. To counsel the Kaminoans on sapient integrity and encourage them to regard the clones as something more than product. She was not here to satisfy herself with her subordinates, singly or otherwise.

She was a Jedi Master. If she couldn’t master herself in this, after all these years, how could she claim mastery of the Force that flowed through her? A Jedi had to rise above base needs — and be humble enough to admit problems and devise solutions with peers. Historically, the solution to this issue involved much meditation and a temporary relocation to a sealed chamber at the distant end of the itinerants’ hall.

Shaak Ti returned her attention to the commander still lingering with unnerving focus. “Fine. I will inform him.”

“Fine,” clipped Blitz. “Thank you, Mistress Ti.” He turned heel and left her gaping at his nerve.

And at the sway of his patterned kama below his belt. And the subtle smell of rain-damp wood he left behind him.

Later, when the ache between her legs gnawed at her brain, Shaak Ti hurried to the medbay to beg soporifics from a droid. A familiar lightness had set into her limbs, as her inguinal organs sponged up blood. Her awareness tunnelled. It became harder to hold onto the serenity of the Force — it was sensitive and slippery like that, like trying to grip a current of water. Existing in the moment, too, demanded great effort. She had to concentrate on exchanging a cold nod with Hina Me, on acknowledging the waist-high salutes of a cadet company, their backs straight against the bowed walls.

Shaak Ti finally reached her room. Tipoca City wasn’t warm, and still she blasted the air cooler in the colorless, compact space, made larger by the transparisteel wall that overlooked the ocean; a meditation stool, Fe’s beads, some cacti from the Temple Gardens — a reminder of rain’s blessing, not its ubiquity — formed the sum of its personal effects. She began to strip with trembling hands.

Maturation brought much relief. Her biannual cycles weren’t as long, nor dangerous; she’d been in the habit of meditating her way through them, though she always crashed afterwards, bandwidth of mind and body maxed out. When that failed, downers, a device, and some do-not-disturb instructions could set her right after a day or three. That would be her method here, where the Force flowed thinly and the air was thick with androgens.

Commander Colt was not told. Not explicitly. As her tool warmed in the nanowave, Shaak Ti fired off a simple message to him: she was seriously unwell, and he was to consider himself in temporary command of the Grand Army stationed on Kamino, along with its reserves and training facilities. She was on comms for emergencies, but was not to be physically disturbed for love or credits.

Alphas were headstrong. They were never satisfied when they’d found the end of a problem; they had to pull it up by the roots with both hands and ask the grass why it grew. She had come to appreciate this about them. Her respect had been earned three, four, five times over by their blistering competence that ran circles around her own sluggish climb up the learning curve.

But when they knocked on her door just as the nanowave dinged, Shaak Ti wished she’d never met them at all.

There were two of them. They had moved in step down the quiet hall, but her montrals weren’t fooled, picking up the mass of their footfalls. The Force practically shouted their signatures. Blitz she knew best: cool and supple, yet columnar, like the limb of some great, unseen god; and Havoc, gritty and shifting, the scree slope of a mountain. Shaak Ti had the disconcerting feeling that they could smell her — not in any conscious way, like she could smell them. Just enough that it reinforced a need to roam in pairs, which they never did. It was Havoc’s shift now. But it wasn’t her place to question their duty rostering, just as it wasn’t his place to come here as shift commander and order her from her quarters. Only the Prime Minister could do that.

“Sir, Commander Colt insists we escort you to the medbay.” Blitz’s voice was full and clear, without the canniness of a helmet.

Shaak Ti frowned. “My compliments to the Commander, but that’s not necessary,” she said, affecting an authority she didn’t feel. She felt drunk. It was a heavy intoxication that sagged in her lekku, not the giddiness that bubbled in her tips after one too many passes at the punchbowl.

The silence was mighty. If they were discussing next steps, it was in handsign.

“We know,” Blitz finally replied. “We’re here to help.”

Shaak Ti stood stunned, keeping her distance from the door. She would not open it. But she called her shimmersilk robe to hand, all the same.

Jango Fett, the Clone Template, their progenitor, had ordered the Alphas to obey and serve the Jedi. That was their prime directive. Shaak Ti wasn’t even sure what oath they’d taken, if any. But she was bound by many things; she’d spent nights committing the Republic Code of Military Justice to memory. Ill-treatment of subordinates and misapplication of service property came presently to mind. If she accepted their help, they would ask all manner of questions and seek her direction and would be bound to comply. It would not be right.

She gathered herself against the want clamoring in her body. “I’ve made myself clear, gentlemen. No assistance is needed. Medical or otherwise. Goodnight.”

Blitz spoke up again. “With respect, sir, we know about your condition — ”

“We may be Alpha planks, sir,” Havoc cut in, “but we can read. And you’re a textbook example of a togruta in estrus.”

Shaak Ti stifled a mewl in her fist. She hadn’t made a noise like that since her feral teenage years. She sagged against the wall. How did they ... ? It wasn’t a secret phenomenon, true — as mundane as any bodily function, really. But they had conspired! They had bored a peephole into her life. For the second time that day, she felt rudely observed.

It was, however, rather rich to be affronted by that, when she’d come here to oversee, monitor, inspect and otherwise snoop.

“Let us help you, sir. Isn’t it better that way?” Blitz offered.

So much better: gorged on pleasure, in throbbing harmony with all life, magnified by her own gifts. She’d done it once, with a clan on Shili during her maturation rites. It’d been almost enough to sway her from a different kind of service, as she’d lain there, an open vessel for every feeling, carnal and uncomplicated.

These men were under no duress, not in this moment. They were consenting, volunteering freely. Outside of Shili, no one had done that for her before, not even fellow knights; certainly no masters, even when she’d reached their ranks. Was it not a honor to the Force, to offer a kindness unbidden to someone in need? It would be over sooner, too: just a standard day, if they kept up the pace. She was well-matured and no longer in the prime of reproductive life. And there was more of them, in every sense ...

Shaak Ti’s hand had slithered between her legs, fingering into her wetness. She didn’t have to imagine how big they’d be. With the height of scientific pride and the depths of indelicacy, Hina Me had paraded four naked clones before her, one of each patented Fett type, bemoaning that she had no sample from their first test batch, for though deranged, the viable half had been remarkable specimens of human physicality. Their statures differed subtly, but Shaak Ti couldn’t help noticing that they were uniformly well-endowed. All eyes front, but only the Alpha clone had met hers, deliberate and defiant. Asking his name seemed inappropriate, and her embarrassment had only compounded with time, to still not know which officer had been made to endure that humiliation.

Had it been one of hers who thickened before her, until he hung heavy in her peripheral — ?

Shaak Ti squeezed her eyes shut. She skirted around her bed to the far corner of her room, under the cooling air duct, and stared out at the roiling deep. The silk glued to her, dampening with her heat. It would be fouled. So much the better, perhaps: it was a strange and shameful gift from Halle Burtoni.

“You cannot help,” she said, more to her reflection than to the men in the hall. What would her peers say? The opinion of the Kaminoans didn’t concern her, but they would surely go red in the fin and sniff at her. “I am responsible for you. As a — ” She didn’t want to say Jedi. It seemed unfair. A brevetship of chance, when they were more capable in many respects. “A representative of the Republic.”

“An administrative detail,” Blitz countered. “We were no one’s responsibility until you came along.”

Heat surged down her lekku. The primal excitement of a threat. “You question my authority?” Her white brow scowled back at her in the pane. Fett might have ordered them to obey, but had clearly said nothing about holding their tongues; they took grumbling and constructive criticism as an act of religion.

“No, sir. We respect it,” said Blitz. “Just as we respect your ability to act responsibly towards us when this is all over. Do you think we can’t do the same?”

Surely this constituted some form of entrapment. But Shaak Ti couldn’t find the logic to argue. Not when she felt like a besh with a body attached. “I cannot ask this of you,” she said. When the silence stretched, she realized she’d whispered it to the waves. She repeated herself, louder. “I cannot ask this of you.”

“You aren’t,” Blitz clarified for the record. “We’re offering.”

Havoc spoke up. “Honestly, sir, you’d be doing Blitz a favor. He’s been rutting into his cod ever since you got here.”

Shaak Ti wheeled round, lekku spinning, feeling the pressure wave of something imminent.

Then came the thunderclap of armor against the door. A scuffling ensued. They were fighting. Something absolutely unheard of in togruta males, and it was not attractive. At the same time, it was also potentially embarrassing for everyone involved in this bizarre negotiation.

If only her door had been locked from without, too. It was altogether too easy for Shaak Ti to slide it open with a flick of her wrist, allowing two clone officers to stumble into her room and out of sight.

Blitz and Havoc clipped halfway to attention in their confusion, shuffling their helmets under their arms. Their pauldrons kissing, their eyes not diverted. They looked surprised — youthful, like two Padawans whose Force antics had granted them access to the larder.

Or maybe that was her.

The room was suddenly so much smaller. Suffused with their scent, too: musky, undisguised, and mouthwatering.

Shaak Ti's loneliness burst its buried dam. She worked in separation, she lived in isolation. Nala Se was courteous, as welcoming as any Kaminoan could be, but she was not a fellow master. There was no community here that she might join. There were the troops and there were the natives with their rigid caste system. She understood a cadre of off-world trainers had lived here alongside the Prime Clone, but his death and the outbreak of the war apparently ended their contracts; a handful remained in the Special Operations wing, but they were Mandalorians — they made the Kaminoans look friendly.

These persistent men had changed everything. They’d just shifted the center of gravity. Shaak Ti’s every thought rolled down into her besh, hungrily. She needed to consume and be consumed.

She let her robe slip, giving in, only if for a night.

#shaak ti #rancor squad #alpha arcs #commander blitz #arc troopers

[four-loose-screws]

An Interview with Mr. Toshiyuki Toyonaga about Fire Emblem (Claude‘s Japanese VA), Pg. 9

Asking More About Previous Titles

Have you played Thracia 776?

Toyonaga     I have. It is another game my aunt had downloaded on her Nintendo Power cart.※

For her to go that far, she must really, really know a lot about games!

Toyonaga    The story takes place in the middle of Genealogy's timeline, and when I heard that Leif is the main character, I thought, ‘Oh, wow, the main character is Leif!?’ I was happy to see Finn in the game. I used Orsin a lot.

It’s known as being one of the most difficult games in the series, so did you get all the way to the end?

Toyonaga     I did. ...No, wait, did I? I remember there being an excruciatingly difficult map towards the very end of the game. Laughs. Thracia is the one where one of its basic mechanics is being able to steal from the enemies to advance, right? You can steal their weapons, and such. So I remember feeling really lost about when to use silver and special weapons. I think I remember feeling that I always wanted to immediately see if there were any enemies wielding Killing Edges, so I could steal them. I kept stealing and stealing as I continued on… So even though Leif’s army said “We will defeat all of the bandits!”, as I played the game, I was left with the impression that they were the ones more like bandits. Laughs.

After that, the next game was on a handheld system, so you had your own Game Boy Advance to play The Binding Blade, correct?

Toyonaga     I did! The first one released was the purple one, right? I had that one.

Yes, it was called “violet.” And that’s when you finally owned your own Fire Emblem game.

Toyonaga     That’s right. I’ve owned the Fire Emblem games myself since then.

We talked about how you were moved by the improvements to the UI in the GBA games, but could you tell us some specifics about that?

Toyonaga     I remember that the combat forecast box, where you can see whether or not your character can attack twice, has been in the games since “The Binding Blade.” I thought as I played that the way it was laid out, and how easy it was to understand, was a really kind gesture!

Before then, you had to look at your character’s and the enemy’s stats, and confirm each one’s speed yourself, huh.

Toyonaga     We did, we did! So I thought it was really kind of the developers! Other than that, the combat screen graphics and animations really felt like those fit for a handheld. The characters didn’t fight within a scene, but in a space that popped out and looked like the game’s tiles. It was really easy on the eyes. I thought, “Wow, this is so cool! Is this handheld game graphics, or a scene from a play?” It left a huge impression on me.

(above) An example of the stunning graphics unfolding on a battle screen in “The Blazing Blade.”

The battle screens looked just like the work of a stagehand, didn’t they?

Toyonaga    They really did! When I played the games when they first came out, my initial reaction was that the features were really kind of the developers, but as I grew up, I came to feel that the comfort of being able to play a level and think it is a bit kind Is really impressive. I think the game developers are really amazing.

Can we ask you about which characters you liked?

Toyonaga    When Roy’s father, Eliwood, made his appearance in The Blazing Blade,* I was very surprised, and thought something along the lines of “Oh, so these two games are connected!” Flips through the character illustration book. I didn’t remember until I looked through this, but I really used Florina a lot. It’s part of my standard play style to use flying units a lot, because they are helpful in so many different situations. After that...Sue! That’s right, SUE!! ...I’m sorry, that was a bit loud.

Laughs.

Toyonaga    I remember now, I used Sue all the time, too. That’s right, this is when the nomadic archers of the Sacae Plains first appeared in the series, who could use longer and shorter range bows. Depending on which exact weapon they had, they could attack from two or three spaces away. I thought, “Three spaces away is really dangerous!” And they’re on horseback! I remember creating strategies based around Sue’s mobility and Chad’s abilities.

(right) Sue, a nomad of the Sacae Plains who appears in The Binding Blade

Then, I believe you said you weren’t able to play Path of Radiance or Radiant Dawn, and you weren’t able to thoroughly play Awakening or Fates, either... 

Toyonaga    That’s right. My workload increased as I got older, and I think those games came out around the time that I devoted myself to my work and didn’t have much time to immerse myself in games any more. Still, I did get to play Awakening…

So then Awakening was the first FE game you did voice work for, correct?

Toyonaga    Yes, it was.

How did doing voice work for a series you like feel?

Toyonaga     Hmm, how did I feel… It’s hard to put it into words, but to be honest, it was really complicated. This is due to the nature of my work, but as an actor, when I voice a character, I listen to the voice acting much more as a “play” than becoming engrossed in that world, and end up analyzing it however I found myself doing so. Asking myself, ‘If it were me, what kind of play would I make?’ and similar questions. I have a tendency to look at it like that. Of course, to just a normal player, I think the inclusion of voice acting probably increases the immersion for them, but I was very worried that I would wind up seeing the “play” as I played the game.

That’s probably normal for all voice actors. So you’re probably thankful for games with an on/off option for the voices, huh?

Toyonaga     Personally, I’m very thankful! Especially recently. I’ve been hearing all the voices as my work friend’s voices. When you hear the voice of someone you know, you can’t help but think of them.

It is a point to worry about as someone who likes games. Laughs. You also talked about how some of Echoes: Shadows of Valentia' features, like the 3D dungeons, left you with a lot of memories, right?

(above) Echoes featured 3D dungeons the player could freely run around in and explore, a first in the FE series. Whenever the main character collides with an enemy, the game enters a battle map.

Toyonaga     Echoes, being a remake of Gaiden, also made me feel nostalgic at many points as I played it. The villager’s class change loop feature was still there, so the game was really fun for me. Echoes’ unique feature is the introduction of multiple 3D dungeons. Moving around a dungeon and entering a battle whenever you touch an enemy is a standard system for an RPG, but in Echoes, the moment you touch an enemy, you enter a simulation map instead. I think that’s really, really revolutionary. I felt that such battle scenes would worry some people that it would break the immersion in the FE experience, but instead, the battles feel like the battle maps that we’ve always played in FE until now. I think it’s really amazing that the change to the formula happens without it feeling out of place at all!

That’s very much the perspective that someone who plays games a lot would have!

Toyonaga     Only around three or four units can deploy in one battle, but those numbers strike a balance between difficulty and skill. ‘This makes me want to level up all my units!’ I thought as I played. And when I pushed the A button to attack and started battles, I felt that this progress of battle would put me at a little bit more of an advantage, and things like that. Starting very far in the back and having to come up close and attack was also a very fun system.

Do you like to level up your characters in general?

Toyonaga     I do! I’m the kind of person who likes to gradually and untiringly max out all of my units.

※Nintendo Power cartridge: A service where one could use a terminal set-up in Lawson locations to download games. Thracia 776 was first released as a download only title.

* T/N: This is the game that was released as simply “Fire Emblem” in the West.

#fire emblem #fe #fe16 #three houses #switch #nintendo #nintendo switch #toyonaga toshiyuki #toshiyuki toyonaga #nindori #nintendo dream #japan #japanese #translation #localization #claude va interview

[translations-by-aiimee]

Dig a Grave to Dig Out a Ghost - Chapter 16

Original Title: 挖坟挖出鬼

Genres: Drama, Horror, Mystery, Supernatural, Yaoi

This translation is based on multiple MTLs and my own limited knowledge of Chinese characters. If I have made any egregious mistakes, please let me know.

Chapter Index

Chapter 16 - Game

Ten minutes later, Lin Yan appeared on the stage awkwardly wearing a silver-grey robe with a small dragon pattern embroidered on it. All ten participants took their seats. Even the Professor File Folder put on a traditional teacher's outfit. The buzzing activity coming from the crowd made Lin Yan blush. It felt like he was sitting on pins and needles; it was uncomfortable no matter how he tried to adjust himself.

This whole situation felt like a melodrama between Liang Shanbo and Zhu Yingtai. He couldn't help but glance back at Xiao Yu several times. The only real ancient man in the audience was standing behind him with a frown. Looking at him with a serious stare, he pressed his hand against Lin Yan's shoulder, like he was trying to comfort him.

When he changed his clothes, he noticed that something was wrong with Xiao Yu, or maybe it was just everything that was wrong. In the dressing room, the ghost had wrapped himself around him and hugged him. He pushed and shoved the other around the narrow room, creasing his costume. Just as Lin Yan was about to start fighting back, Xiao Yu suddenly stopped tugging him around. He pulled him over to the mirror, put his chin on Lin Yan's shoulder and he stared at the person in the reflection. For the first time, his chaotic eyes seemed calm, even holding a quiet sadness.

The mirror surface swayed, like a droplet hitting a calm pool of water, waves rippling away from the center. Standing in the brass mirror was a young man standing with clear eyes, hands resting beside a cloud brocade waistband, and a face exuding pride. Lin Yan backed away in horror. He almost screamed. The person in the mirror wasn't him. Although he had the exact same face, life had done a number on him and he wouldn't be able to make an expression like that anymore.

The scent of agarwood incense in the room was intoxicating. The young man's eyes softened. The tall man in the traditional Chinese clothes adjusted his chin on his shoulder, raising his long eyebrows. His voice was slow and hoarse, as if he hadn't spoken in a long time: "I've been waiting for you for so long. . ."

Lin Yan's head snapped back to the mirror. He staggered forwards and leaned against the mirror. The person in front of him had hair as black as paint, and his mottled blood coat didn't match his eyes that seemed so sad and hopeless. . .

I have been waiting for you for a long time.

Lin Yan scrambled out of the dressing room.

"The break is over. Please quiet down and we'll get started with our next activity." The girl in the red jacket skirt read.

Lin Yan sat in the chair in a daze. The bright stage lights and the dark crowd in the audience made him feel like what just happened in the dressing room was a hallucination, and Xiao Yu was no different. Lin Yan looked back at him, panicked. Xiao Yu leaned down and held his trembling hand. On the table were a small whiteboard and a soft black marker. Xiao Yu motioned for him to pick it up and he moved his hand across the whiteboard: I'll help you.

Lin Yan was stunned and wrote out: Do you remember something?

Xiao Yu didn't seem to want to answer. He shook his head and let go of his hand. He still stood behind him holding onto Lin Yan's shoulder for support.

The audience quieted down, and bright white chasing lights hit the mahogany silk box on the centre of the stage. The red jacket skirt girl stepped forward to open the silk box, revealing the glass box within. The audience let out a few exclamations, and Lin Yan's eyes lit up. It was a beautiful moon flask with two handles. The maiden leaned against the tree art, the linework was meticulous, the enamel fully covered the flask, the piece was still intact, and the overall flask was in good condition.

This authentification wasn't difficult for a student studying cultural relics. Lin Yan carefully looked at the glaze texture and enamel of the flask's body. He wrote his answer on the whiteboard after double-checking that it was correct. When the time was up, the host walked past the square table and stopped when he reached the PSP guy, holding up her mic and asking: "You, what's your answer?"

The PSP guy’s whiteboard turned out to be empty. He was leaning on the table and his attention was focused on his game. When the host asked the second time, he raised his head as if he had just woken up. He glanced lazily around and sarcastically twitched the corners of his mouth into a smile. "It's genuine," he spat out. Then he brushed the host off and lowered his head to continue playing the game.

Lin Yan knew this guy was arrogant, but he didn't expect him to act this to everyone. The girl in the red jacket skirt was embarrassed by PSP's attitude. After putting a polite expression back on her face, she nodded and walked to the next student.

"Well. . . There were nine students who got the answer right, might as well switch it up for the last one." The audience let out a good laugh, and the boy three places down from Lin Yan grinned and left the stage. The professor briefly spoke about the flask. Lin Yan cleaned off the whiteboard and waited for the next question. His mind couldn't get over what he saw. He thought that most people wouldn't make a mistake on such a simple question. It seemed that the people on the stage were not as professional as they thought.

Professor File Folder also seemed a little disappointed. He took a sip from his stainless steel cup and turned his attention to the laptop, not knowing what he was looking at.

The brocade box in the center of the stage was swapped with a smaller one. After the mysterious sound effect, the box slowly opened. It was an ancient book. The host motioned everyone to take a closer look. Lin Yan stood in front of the glass box for a while and returned to his seat to write the next answer: "Genuine, the Southern Opera "White Rabbit" published in the Ming Dynasty, unearthed from the tomb of the Xuan family in Jiading."

He had seen this thing in the Shanghai Museum. Lin Yan thought, this lecture is like an antique appreciation meeting. No wonder it attracted so many people. After they all answered the question, another person left the stage amidst the applause and whistle of the audience, leaving another armchair free.

The questions were asked one by one, gradually getting more and more difficult. A fake yet elaborate sunflower gold hairpin inlaid with gemstones stumped three people, and then a bucket-colour fine-grained water chestnut bucket imitation with a "grinding" technique even had Lin Yan hesitate with his answer. After the authenticity of each item was announced, the professor simply added a few points on the piece, which could count as educating the audience on the topic. The seats were vacated one by one. When the eighth object was brought out, there were only two people left on the stage. Lin Yan glanced to the right, and it was the PSP guy who had toughed it out until the end.

He looked careless, but he didn't expect that he understood the field so well. Lin Yan put his cold palms on his face to cool down and took a long breath as he waited for the next question.

The red jacket skirt girl was holding a delicate paper box in her hand. Instead of showing it to the audience first, she walked over to Lin Yan and the PSP guy, signalling them to come forward. She opened the paper box and carefully took out a fan.

The ink on the front of the golden fan wasn't very visible; it wasn't well-preserved. The ribs of the fan were slightly damaged, and there are signs of water damage on the ink-painted mountains. With this kind of condition, it would be difficult to fetch a good price in a private auction if it wasn't made by a famous artist. But when the inscription on the face of the fan was exposed, Lin Yan and the PSP man couldn’t help but breathe a sigh of relief. On the front, a few lines of the unruly inscription were written on the fan: “Wildwater Bridge Road, The Village of Barren Chickens and Fallen Leaves. Returned to Hou Xidu, The Child Sweeps the Firewood Door." What surprised the two of them were the three small characters following the poem: by Tang Yin.

Lin Yan's heart sped up. If this was Tang Yin's authentic work, then the fan in front of him was worth at least 500,000 yuan. Wasn't he afraid of being robbed bringing such a valuable thing to school? Then a clear picture of the fan was shown on the big screen. As expected by Lin Yan, an exclamation sounded from the audience, and even the host's voice was drowned by the buzzing discussion.

Professor File Folder grew impatient and coughed into the loudspeaker to signal the audience to shift their attention back to the event.

Lin Yan carefully looked at the light brown fan in front of him. He couldn't help but take his time with his answer. Tang Yin's paintings were extremely difficult to distinguish in the field of calligraphy and painting. His style of painting changed throughout his pieces, and he rarely indicated the year on the paintings so it was difficult to guess the painting based on its creation year. Therefore, there were countless counterfeiters and imposters on the market. To be honest, judging this kind of work could only be based on the painting style, date and seal inscription. The most important thing is the eye and inspiration of the connoisseur. Being extremely familiar with the author’s style, the first time he saw the work, he could only make a guess. This wasn't just an answer determined by years of study, but it was also just a luck-based gamble.

In the early years of the founding of the People’s Republic of China, many collectors relied on this ability to make money at auctions overnight, but it was too difficult for students like Lin Yan who hadn’t even finished school. He frowned and thought carefully. Regardless of the painting style, the date and the handwriting of this fan were almost flawless. Although there was a slight deviation from Tang Yin's other landscape paintings, the vigorous and unrestrained spirit of the brush strokes clearly distinguished this piece.

It should be the original one. . . Lin Yan bit on his pen and hesitated. Halfway through writing out his answer, his wrist was suddenly grabbed. Xiao Yu bent down and studied the fan carefully. His fingers lightly tracing the red seal and he seemed surprised. He shook his head at Lin Yan and crossed off the half-written "true" on the whiteboard with his hand.

"After so long, you still haven't figured it out?" PSP guy leaned over to Lin Yan casually with a disdainful expression. Seeing Lin Yan still holding the pen hesitantly, he couldn't help but sneer, "I thought you were so awesome."

The file folder-like professor was staring at his notebook in a daze. Hearing these words, he couldn't help turn his head around and looked at the two with interest. Lin Yan just focused his attention on the painting instead and had forgotten to be nervous. As soon as he raised his head to meet the professor's gaze, his cheeks became hot again. He couldn't help but cry inside. He originally planned to wait for the end of the event to ask the professor backstage regardless of whoever won the contest. Now he feels like he wouldn't be able to ask him anything if he lost to this guy in this activity.

"Hurry up, hurry up." PSP guy tapped the table with a pen and made some muffled noises. "Just go home already, you aren't qualified for this."

When the professor heard this, he couldn't hide his amusement and turned his face to take a sip of water to cover up his expression.

That was rude. He hadn't finished yet. Lin Yan clenched his fist and asked Xiao Yu as quietly as possible: "Are you sure?" Xiao Yu nodded, his pale fingers stroked his throat, and frowned. After a long time, it seemed that it took a lot of effort to say slowly and hoarsely: ". . . I drew it."

Lin Yan's eyes widened. He looked at Xiao Yu in disbelief, and then at the fan. In ancient times, there was no perfect reprinting technology. Famous paintings and calligraphy were often copied by literati and calligraphers. Some were for practice, some were to give to friends. Some were for selling, and the prices of those high-quality copies were even comparable to the originals. But Xiao Yu's counterfeit actually appeared here. . . Wasn't this too much of a coincidence?

"Dude, if you don't know what it is, stop wasting our time." Seeing Lin Yan's hesitation, the PSP guy shook his head impatiently. He lowered his head and continued to play his game, pressing the buttons with his thumb, clicking them loudly.

Lin Yan was also irritated but by this person's attitude. He took a deep breath and wrote his answer on the whiteboard. The crowd in the audience couldn't wait. The people in the nearby seats pointed at the PowerPoint. Someone nodded gently, seeming to recognize the authenticity of the painting.

The sound effect of a gong sounded, and when the host read out the answers of the two, Lin Yan heard a commotion in the audience and even a disdainful sneer from the corner of the room. However, the PSP guy completely ignored the audience’s reaction and crossed his legs. He glanced at Lin Yan, touched the pimples on his face and raised an eyebrow with a chuckle: "You're right, not bad."

The same answer was written on both whiteboards: fake.

The professor showed an appreciative smile on his face for the first time. After he said the right answer, he grabbed the microphone and explained to the audience: "Tang Yin's fan "Xiqiao Going Back to the River", a work made during the Ming Dynasty Chenghua period. The author is unknown. The two students answered correctly."

There was a sigh from the auditorium. This time, most of the people who had thought they were right about their guess couldn't help pointing at the screen to discuss the flaws in the fan. There was even a school official wearing a black suit in the front row who had turned around and argued fiercely with the guests in the back row.

Author unknown? Lin Yan wasn't focusing on the fan, instead looking back at Xiao Yu. His hands still rested on his shoulder, but he didn't respond to anything Professor File Folder was saying. Instead, he frowned as if immersed in memory. He seemed really lost in thought. Lin Yan looked into Xiao Yu's eyes, no longer as wild as a beast like when he first saw him. Now, his dark eyes were like the surface of the river after sunrise, and the turbid fog was slowly burned away in the sun, revealing a hint of clarity from within the chaos.

"Now that the first nine rounds are over, please give your attention to the last round with these two classmates, which is also the most difficult round today." The red jacket skirt girl raised her voice and signalled to something behind her.

#dig a grave to dig out a ghost #chinese bl #chinese novel #english translation #yaoi #danmei #yaoi novel

[puddygeeks]

Dusk Till Dawn - Dragon Age Inquisition - Cullen/Inquisitor

Masterlist

Rating: Suitable for all

A/N: This is actually my first ever piece of writing from the perspective of an existing character, especially a male so cut me some slack whilst I experiment with this new venture. I also do not tend to write in the 3rd person, so this piece has been a learning curve for me. However, I felt hugely inspired to write a fluffy piece about my fluffy boy, so enjoy! Let me know if you’d like to see more DA based content from me in future.

Summary: Commander Cullen struggles to maintain a professional, working relationship with the Inquisition’s fearless leader. As the realisation dawns on him that his thoughts linger on her, he begins to question whether the feeling is mutual.

Fandom: Dragon Age

Pairing: Cullen Rutherford/Lavellan

My writing is entirely fuelled by coffee! If you enjoy my work, feel free to donate toward my caffeine dependency: will work for coffee

Warnings: Perhaps some mild spoilers?

Standing across the war table, hand placed comfortably on the hilt of his sword, Commander Cullen focused on remaining professional. 

Their fearless leader assigned missions and plotted political manoeuvres that would shape the very fabric of all the Kingdoms in Thedas. Despite being plucked from relative obscurity, she rose to this responsibility as if made for it and led the rapidly growing Inquisition with grace and wisdom. 

Without warning, her large, almond shaped eyes met his and he felt his very spirit stir at the subtle connection between them. Buried in the deep hue of her eyes, he could always sense some hidden power that was disguised by her petite frame and seemingly harmless appearance. 

He felt himself fidget on the spot, an involuntary movement that had escaped his carefully controlled facade and he noticed a slight smile lurking in the corners of her mouth. 

There was a hint of playfulness in the way that she viewed him, he thought, before she swept from the chamber, leaving it notably colder by her absence. Surely he must have been mistaken. She was an icon, a force of nature in the crumbling world and would never view him as anything more than her lieutenant.

“My, my. Are you blushing, Commander?” 

Leliana’s sickly sweet voice drifted from his side, tainting the drafty space with her sly implications. 

It was not the first time that suggestions of this nature had been made about him, but each time caused him to bristle with embarrassment in a manner that was entirely more revealing than intended. He made a sound that almost resembled a scoff at the absurdity of her statement, but it strangely combined with an awkward splutter that filled the bard’s usually pale face with a smug satisfaction. 

“I do believe you may be correct, Leliana. Our dearest Commander certainly does seem rather flustered. Why, I could not possibly suggest a cause for such a reaction.” Josephine taunted, her words coated in a barely concealed enthusiasm as she studied him over the top of her papers. 

Cullen cleared his throat in a joyless bid to regain some composure, as his colleagues gazed past him at each other with mischief gleaming in their eyes.

“Surely you both have other matters to attend to? Nobles to pamper, or spies to train?” He countered, a poignant lack of authority in his voice, as the women crossed their arms and met his suggestions with a blatant disdain.

The Inquisitor inspired courage and determination in the recruits, each viewing her as a symbol of hope and light in the darkness. For Cullen, however, she was a constant distraction and a trigger for his most regretful, tense behaviours. 

As time passed, he found that he was able to recognise traits within her that others were blind to. He was stunned by the depth of her kindness towards him. Regardless of the shame that he felt when presenting his issues with addiction for her judgement, he was always met with understanding and compassion. These were new experiences for Cullen and the emotions that they provoked in him were completely unexplored territory.

On the battlements of Skyhold, he embarked on his regular stroll to examine and assess their sustainability, when an unfamiliar sight caused him to pause in his tracks. Standing by the edge, staring out into the mountains with an intense expression was the Inquisitor, clearly deeply lost in thought. 

She didn’t seem to notice Cullen’s arrival, as her gloved hands gripped onto the stone wall and he recognised that the usual strength that radiated from her was absent. In what she believed to be a solitary moment, her defences were lowered and she had allowed herself an opportunity to be vulnerable. 

Cullen felt awkward witnessing this, feeling the familiar sensation of invading upon a sacred space as he’d often experienced throughout his youth in the Chantry.

“Are you going to stand and stare all day, or would you prefer to join me, Commander?” 

His stomach churned as her words cut through the tense silence and she turned to glance at him over her shoulder with a gentle smile. He blanched at her casual offer, feeling pressure compressing his chest and she returned to her pondering, blissfully unaware of the nerves that her presence summoned in him.

“I apologise, my lady. It was not my intention to intrude, nor to stare.” He managed to force the words out through the block in his throat, but as they left his mouth, he acknowledged the deeply ingrained formality in the way that he addressed her. She smiled fondly at nothing in particular. 

There was a stifling atmosphere as he realised that there was not another soul in sight and inwardly, he scolded himself for not recognising the absence of guards earlier. He knew that they had likely already shifted their positions out of respect, to allow her a moment of peace and he felt embarrassed at his perceived social blunder.

“You’re not intruding. You don’t need to tiptoe around me, you know. I don’t bite.” She commented idly and Cullen tightened his grip on his sword in stress. 

The instances of flirtatious remarks were mounting, an overpowering suggestion in his already cluttered mind and each new addition increased his difficulty in denying their presence. They were an ever present force, haunting him at all hours of the day with their desire to be acknowledged. He pushed it away, desperately pleading with his heart to allow him to remain focused and appropriate. The Inquisitor regarded him with an amused disbelief, as he remained at his cautious distance.

“Do you ever simply stop patrolling, or working, and allow yourself a few moments of peace? Our surroundings are idyllic. It’s wasteful not to appreciate them.” She urged, gesturing for him to join her and, unable to deny her request for a second time, he reluctantly marched over to her side with his legs feeling as heavy as led.

The view from the battlements was breath-taking, but it was difficult to fully realise it’s wonder beside the simple splendour of her beauty. She sighed wistfully, the pleasant sound causing a flutter in his stomach and he relished the circumstances that allowed him to witness her in a more relaxed state than he’d ever been entrusted with in the past. 

Surrounded by snowy mountains and without the usual bustle of demands pressing against them, the silence was no longer tense and Cullen allowed his shoulders to gradually lower into a comfortable slouch.

“We filled this empty shell with purpose and belief.” She began, breaking the silence in a sour manner. 

“The halls are bustling with people determined to bring change to our world and the courtyard has become a home to the faithful. Undeterred by all theories to the contrary, we’ve proven it possible to unite mages and templars against a common enemy, under a single, inclusive banner that fights for the freedom of all.” She detailed, as she listed achievements that should have filled her voice with pride, but instead the words rang hollow and her tone remained lacklustre. 

Cullen was unnerved by her raw, unenthusiastic demeanour that existed in stark contrast to the invigorating personality that she displayed in the company of her comrades. 

“And yet, at the head of this mighty cause is a single elf. Inquisitor Lavellan. Despite all of the titles, followers and respect, I am still merely a Dalish with a strange light imbued in my palm. My value is awarded as a result of missing memories that humans have interpreted as a symbol of divine intervention. Tell me, Commander Cullen, what certainty can you possess that I am worthy of such duty?” Lavellan turned to face him, her eyes alight with a storm of emotions that blazed from the inside and he was lost under the intensity of her doubt.

Words failed him as he floundered in search of an answer that could provide her with the peace that she so desperately desired. 

In his heart, he knew that his belief in her was greater than any other within this fortress, or indeed all Thedas itself. He knew that if he allowed himself to be honest, he could list all of the admirable qualities that he had long admired about the awe-worthy being before him. 

Regretfully, his terror of unveiling the depth of his devotion prevented him from granting her with honesty. Instead, he beheld her with a barely concealed state of adoration and she sighed in disappointment.

“I’m sorry. I’ve posed a question that you couldn’t possibly answer. I suppose I should know better than to burden others with my own insecurities.” She excused, turning her face from him with an unsatisfied void in her eyes that would remain with him for as long as he lived. 

The cool, crisp air tore through the gaps in their defences, carrying the loose sections of her silver hair out behind her like wings and only exaggerated her appearance to him as some kind of ethereal being. 

As his gaze explored her features, he noticed that her nose and cheeks glowed in a delicate shade of pink that spread to the tips of her gracefully pointed ears and he wondered how long she had been standing here, allowing her exposed skin to grow cold. He ached to lighten her burden, to remove the knot that formed between her brows as she battled the responsibilities that threatened to crush her beneath their weight and against his better judgement, his answer began to flow freely from his lips.

“In all of my years as a templar, I have followed leaders of many different titles. Each of them possessed their own approach, their own qualities that influenced their choices and shaped their time in power.” He recounted, uncertain of the confessions that might escape his lips as he spoke without restraint.

“Never have I known any other to rise from the ashes as you have, nor for the people to elect them with such fervent belief. They follow you with unshakable faith, as do I, not because of your origins, your race or your rumoured holiness. They follow because of your decisions, because you lead with a grace and wisdom that comes from deep within and is unique to your formidable soul.” 

“You are the Inquisitor not because of the anchor that you wield, but because there is no other who could fulfil this duty as you have. You are indisputably, unfathomably, exceptionally more than ‘merely a Dalish’, Lady Lavellen.” He spoke with conviction and with every shred of reasoning, he observed her becoming increasingly humbled by his confession. 

Of course, Cullen knew her name, but he wouldn’t dare to address her by it, believing that it disrespected her journey and consequent struggles to earn the title which she now held. Her eyes grew wide and it was clear that she was shocked by the passion of his words, whilst he waited in a terror ridden state, fearing that he had absolutely revealed too much.

“It is incomprehensible to me that you are capable of such earnest insight into others, whilst believing yourself to be scarcely more than a failed ex-templar.” She surveyed him with a sympathetic, yet frustrated expression and as often would occur in her company, Cullen found himself lost for words. 

When under her gaze, he felt unworthy of the praise that she often bestowed upon him and could not fathom her unwavering faith in him. Even when he had suggested that Cassandra replace him, Lavellan refused to allow him to relinquish his position and insisted that he could defeat his demons to abstain from the use of lyrium once and for all. There was no doubt in his mind that she made him a better person, but in spite of all his improvement, he still could not even begin to imagine himself as deserving of her fondness.

Lavellan turned from the wall to face him fully, closing the distance between them until she was nearer than he’d ever had cause to be. In such proximity, he could smell the natural scent of flowers and herbs on her skin, admired the sun that glinted in her eyes and his face flushed with a heat that exposed his exhilaration. 

For longer than he could ever truly admit, he had laid awake at night, imagining what a privilege it would be to touch her, but he would never be so bold as to attempt such a sin. Involuntarily, he gulped as she pouted her plump lips thoughtfully and his heart pounded with such intensity that he felt concerned that it could cease to function at any given moment. 

She leaned forward at a painfully gradual pace and had to shift her balance onto her toes in order to reach him. With ice tinted lips, she placed a single delicate kiss on his cheek, contrasting sharply with the burning of his skin. 

Instead of immediately moving away she lingered there, her breath tickling his neck as her mouth brushed his ear.

“Your faith extinguishes my fear, unlike any other.” She whispered, her words burning into Cullen’s mind like a brand from an iron that could never be compromised. 

All of his senses seemed to be intensified, as he committed every minute detail to memory for fear that this experience may not occur more than once. When she leaned back into his field of vision, her features glowed with fondness and he simply gawped at her in amazement. 

“You put my heart at ease, Cullen. Thank you.” She admitted with a relaxed sigh and without a further word, or any indication that she would explain the meaning behind this statement, she parted from him. 

As Lavellan’s delicate steps echoed down the stone staircase, Cullen remained rooted to the spot, obsessively analysing the conversation and wondering if he’d perhaps misunderstood. Perhaps the mountain of comments in his mind that he’d long considered to be indulgent, self-delusion had accumulated into something more significant than he’d ever dared to imagine.

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