#Harry potter incorrect quotes | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

handledwithgloves · 2 days

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draco: i dont want to die a virgin!

harry: me neither!

draco: wait , that gives me an idea.

ron: no! no!

#drarry #harry potter #draco malfoy #ron weasley #harry potter incorrect quotes #drarry incorrect quotes

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crackishincorrecthp · 3 days

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Harry: I found a note in one of my old potions notes that said "Note to self: Get revenge on Malfoy"...Except I couldn't remember what I was supposed to get revenge for Harry: But I trusted my own judgment, so I went with it Draco: Hmm... I don't know what you were supposed to get revenge for, either Harry: I can only assume you got what was coming to you. Not 100 percent sure, though Draco: Well, whatever I did, I guess I deserved it Harry: Let that possibly be a lesson to you

#harry potter incorrect quotes #incorrect harry potter quotes #incorrect hp quotes #incorrect drarry quotes #harry potter #harry james potter #draco malfoy #draco lucius malfoy

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the-great-1989-cheese-disaster · 20 hours

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James: Bonjour, Regulus. Voulez–vous coucher avec moi?

Regulus: No, I don't want to sleep with you.

James: Is that what that means? Oh, man, I had a really gross tennis instructor.

#hp #harry potter #harry potter incorrect quotes #hp marauders #james potter #harry potter marauders #marauders incorrect quotes #marauders fandom #marauders #james incorrect quotes #james potter incorrect quotes #james #james x regulus #jegulus #regulus black incorrect quotes #regulus black #regulus

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loz-tearsofahomo · 3 months

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James: and so I'm pretty sure I'm in love with Reg-

Evan: I'm sorry?

James: Well hes-

Evan: No I'm just sorry.

Barty: yeah mate praying for you

#marauders #hp #Slytherin skittles #jegulus #james potter #starchaser #regulus black #barty crouch jr #evan rosier #the slytherin skittles #the marauders #marauders era #marauders incorrect quotes #harry potter incorrect quotes #harry potter #loz posts #rosekiller

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valentinetypewriter · 8 months

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Marauders x Y/n incorrect quotes

Can be read as poly or as platonic

Masterlist

—

Y/n, setting down a card: Ace of spades

Sirius, pulling out an Uno card: +4

James, pulling out a Pokémon card: Jolteon, I choose you

Remus, trembling: What are we playing

—

*Y/n is cooking*

Sirius: Any chance that’s for me?

Y/n: It’s for Remus. I’m planning on making some bad choices tonight, and I need him on my side

James: I never realised the planning that went into being a disappointment

—

Y/n: Dammit, Sirius!

Sirius: What?! It wasn’t me!

Y/n: Sorry, force of habit. Dammit, James!

James: Not me either

Y/n: Oh...Then who set the common room on fire?

Remus: *whistles*

—

James: I sleep with a gun under my pillow

Sirius: I sleep with a knife

Y/n: Both of you are pathetic

James: Oh yeah? What do you sleep with?

Y/n: Remus

—

James: What’s the announcement, Remus?

Remus: It’s a lecture. Sirius’s gonna tell us everything he knows about sex

Y/n: It should be an enjoyable 60 seconds

—

James: I spy with my little eye something that begins with the letter “s”

Y/n: *looks over at Sirius and Remus*

Y/n: Is it “sexual tension”?

—

Y/n: Hey Remus, wanna third wheel on my date with James tomorrow

Remus: Sure

Y/n: Sirius! Wanna third wheel on my date with James tomorrow?

Y/n: Great! I've always wanted to go on a double date!

Remus & Sirius: ...

James: Y/n…

—

Remus: Bad news—James locked us out of our dorm room

Remus: Good news—we didn’t have to wait around for a professor

Remus: Bad news—Sirius finds it very concerning that I know how to pick locks, and tried to unlock my tragic backstory. I was too embarrassed to admit that the reason I learned it was because, at thirteen, I figured that was the kind of skill that would impress cute girls

Remus: Good news—a cute girl saw me do it

Remus: Bad news—it was Y/n, and since she's already seen me fall out of several trees, cry because I saw a fawn that was just too damn small, and knows I can ride a unicycle, she'll never think I’m cool no matter what I do. It’s too late

—

James: Sirius, you'll be working with Remus and Y/n

Sirius: Alright! My fantasy threesome!

Everyone else: *blank stares*

Sirius: ...Of people on a team

—

Remus: Sorry I'm late, I was doing stuff and got distracted

Y/n: I'm stuff!

Sirius: I'm got distracted!

James: We had sex

#the marauders x reader #poly!marauders x reader #the marauders era #the marauders #harry potter #Harry potter x reader #marauders imagine #marauders incorrect quotes #incorrect quotes #harry potter incorrect quotes #james potter #sirius black #remus lupin #James potter x reader #Sirius black x reader #Remus lupin x reader #poly!marauders #poly!marauders imagine

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redadidassneakers · 14 days

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Wolfstar raising Harry

Harry: *watching Remus pour Coca-Cola down the sink* what are you doing?

Remus: I’m using this to dissolve whatever gunk is clogging the drain

Harry: cool, do you think it will dissolve the screwdriver that’s down there?

Remus: the fucking what?

#wolfstar raises harry #the marauders era #incorrect quote #the maruaders #sirius black #remus lupin #harry potter incorrect quotes #toddler harry potter #baby harry potter #harry potter #wolfstar textpost #wolfstar raising harry #wolfstar

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hxuse-xf-black · 6 months

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[Deathly Hallows] Hermione: Harry- Harry, sighing despondently: Ginny used to call me Harry. Ron: Because it's your fucking name.

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apparentlytheproblem · 1 year

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falling asleeep om malfoy

𝙧𝙖𝙘𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙝𝙚𝙖𝙧𝙩𝙨

fandom- Harry Potter

pairing(s)- draco malfoy

a/n: this isn't the best but it's something i wrote to one of my favourite bois, the gif sounds like he's saying my favourite- requests are forever open luv, tiya

requested- yes

currently playing- forever favourite

warnings- none i think-

"don't fall asleep on me, darlin" Draco cooed

his voice oh damn the lord, it sounded so pretty calling you darling. you'd want to hear it roll of his tongue over and over again. just wanna play it on a loop.

even against his misguided words, he had his hand around you waist, letting you lean on him with your head on his chest. you could hear his pretty heart beating so quickly.

why was he so nervous talking to his friends huh?

he had gone back discussing something about Potter again. maybe that's why his heart was beating so fast. Him and his bloody Potter for Merlin's sake. it was as if he was in love with him.

pottah this, pottah that, potta breathes, potta looked.

Malfoy on the other hand was having a whole panic attack inside his head.

is she comfortable? where do i keep my hand?

am i comfortable for her?

their droopy eyes slowly closed and they'd gone to sleep.

draco malfoy couldn't even pay attention to whatever they were talking about, his favourite subject in the world was in his arms.

his world was in his arms.

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itstheghostofmypast · 9 months

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Y/N reading in peace.

Draco glaring at her

Y/N: *ignores*

Draco continues to glare

Y/N sighing: What?

Draco: what are you reading?

Y/N: shhh, I'm at a good part, he's talking about his crush.

Draco: THAT'S MY JOURNAL!

Y/N: You mean your diary?

Draco: No, my journal.

Y/N: Right...also, it's best to tell your girlfriend how much you like the sound of her laugh instead of writing it in a secret diary.

Draco: I'll hex you, I swear.

Y/N: Aww~ Like how you wrote in this last entry about me being able to hex your heart-

Draco malfunctioning

#draco fluff #draco imagine #draco x reader #harry potter incorrect quotes #harry potter #draco malfoy #draco x hufflepuff!reader #draco x y/n #draco fic #draco lucius malfoy #X you #Incorrect quotes #slytherin #ravenclaw #gryffindor #Fluff #Nah im sure he calls his diary a journal #He the type to do that

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yourgalgremlin · 2 months

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From this

#incorrect shameless quotes #harry potter #draco malfoy #lucius malfoy #drarry #incorrect drarry quotes #incorrect hp quotes #harry potter incorrect quotes #incorrect harry potter quotes #harry x draco #draco x harry #draco and harry #harry and draco #hp

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incorrectly-mischievous · 9 months

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Harry: people who sleep with their phones on silent really don’t care about anybody

Draco: if you decide to have a problem after midnight, that’s between you and god

#remus lupin #sirius black #the marauders #wolfstar #hp #harry potter #james potter #lily evans #peter pettigrew #the marauders’ era #drarry #harry potter incorrect quotes #draco malfoy

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punkharryp0tt3r · 6 months

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Sirius: Say Padfoot!

James: No, say dada! Come on!

Baby Harry:

Lily, watching them: Stop pressuring the baby please.

James: We are not pressuring him!

Remus: Yes you fucking are.

James, gasping: Remus!

Baby Harry: Remus

Everyone, staring at Harry:

Remus: Holy shit-

Baby Harry: Shit

Everyone: REMUS!

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crackishincorrecthp · 3 days

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Draco: Being smart has never stopped me from being a complete fucking idiot

#harry potter incorrect quotes #incorrect harry potter quotes #incorrect hp quotes #draco malfoy #draco lucius malfoy

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the-great-1989-cheese-disaster · 20 hours

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James: I spy with my little eye something that begins with the letter “s”.

Peter: *looks over at Sirius and Remus*

Peter: Is it “sexual tension”?

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incorrect-drarry-quote · 3 months

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Draco, eating breakfast: Oh, hello again. We really need to stop meeting like this.

Harry, who walked out of his bedroom in his house into his kitchen: Maybe we would, if you would STOP BREAKING INTO MY FUCKING HOUSE

#harry potter #draco malfoy #harry potter incorrect quotes #incorrect harry potter quotes #drarry #drarry incorrect quotes #incorrect drarry quotes #incorrect drarry #drarry incorrect

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loz-tearsofahomo · 5 months

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Sirius & Barty bored in azkaban

Sirius: bart

Barty Crouch Jr: ...

Sirius: pssst barty

Barty Crouch Jr: ...

Sirius: BARTEMIUS CROUCH JUNIO-

Barty Crouch Jr: WHAT.

Sirius: Truth or Dare

Barty Crouch Jr: cant bloody do dares in here can we?

Sirius: TRUTH or DARE

Barty Crouch Jr: only if I can ask first-

Sirius: no-

Barty Crouch Jr: yes-

Sirius: -fine

Barty Crouch Jr: Truth or Dare

Sirius *rolling his eyes*: truth

Barty Crouch Jr: did you and that lupin kid ever get round to fucking

Sirius: ...

Sirius: How the fuck did you know that-

Barty Crouch Jr: My gaydar never lies-

Sirius: your WHAT

Barty Crouch Jr: -the horny levels were through the roof-

Sirius: OKAYMYTURN

Barty Crouch Jr: -I mean really it was obvious

Sirius: are you fucking done now

Barty Crouch Jr: right, truth

Sirius: You didn't even let me ask

Barty Crouch Jr: This might surprise you pretty boy but I don't actually care.

Sirius: ugh whatever

Sirius: ...

Sirius: Who was Reg's most surprising kiss

Barty Crouch Jr: ooo hoo hoo

Sirius: what

Barty Crouch Jr: Oh get fucking ready for this, god Reg is gonna murder me from the grave

Sirius: well it couldn't have been that bad-

Barty Crouch Jr: It was potter.

Sirius: haha funny joke now cmon-

Barty Crouch Jr: I'm not joking.

Sirius: ...

Sirius *looking up* : JAMES FLEAMONT POTTER SO HELP ME GOD YOU ARE GETTING A FUCKINT BEATING IN HEAVEN OH MY-

Barty crouch jr *looking down* : Reggie please don't kill me

Sirius *still yelling at james from the grave* : ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME, YOU GO AND DIE ON ME THEN NEXT I FIND OUT YOU KISSED MY PERFECTLY INNOCENT LITTLE BROTHER-

Barty Crouch Jr: I mean- he was a death eater not exactly innocent-

Sirius: oh shut up will you I'm having a bad day

Barty Crouch Jr: well what do you fucking expect this is azkaban

Sirius: doesn't mean you have the right to make it worse.

Barty Crouch Jr: well I mean he did betray the dark lord so there's that-

Sirius: WHAT

Barty Crouch Jr: well duh you didn't know

Sirius: WHAT DO YOU MEAN DUH OF COURSE I DIDNT KNOW

Barty Crouch Jr: fucking stupid gryffindor, yk i got twelve Os on my NEWTS

Sirius: NOBODY CARES!!! ALSO I'M HAVING A CRISIS RIGHT NOW

#barty crouch jr #sirius black #marauders #hp #the marauders #the slytherin skittles #the slytherin boys #harry potter #wolfstar #jegulus #long post #i dont expect this to get any notes #i did this instead of a crack fic bc thats too much work #marauders incorrect quotes #harry potter incorrect quotes #loz posts

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