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flippythedoodle · 5 months

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hey can u give some tips for a beginner ambigrammist to refine her ambigrams and make the process easier?

i'll just put what ive learned from others and my own experience (i kinda put a lot so imma put it all under a read more)

1. you need to really know what letters look like

one of the talents an ambigrammist needs is to know the details of what makes a letter a letter, and what strengthens or weakens this reading. for example:

on the right are what i would say are very readable letters, almost instantly recognizable. on the left however are essentially the same letters, but missing the core elements of what makes them them. i recommend looking at fonts if you really want to fully understand, but as long as you know the glyphs, you can ambigram them!

additionally, there are so many other forms to choose from. we're all used to the simple, elementary alphabet we were taught, but there is a vast sea of different forms of letters you can try! things such as style, form, and mutations if done correctly will look cohesive in a design! experiment with cursive, square, fancy, blackletter, capitalization, italicization, the world is possible! for example, here are the many ways to write an r that i've collected:

14!!

14 for the LETTER R ALONE. the modifications may be subtle, but in the world of ambigramming where totally legible ambigrams are far and few between, every possible form counts bc you'll have more options at your disposal to choose from. as you see more ambigrams (and trust me, you probably will), you'll learn more about what's possible with them!

2. get feedback!!

the unique thing about ambigrams is theyre made to be seen by others, to be read and gawked at by onlookers, and so any outside feedback means the world to development. let family members, friends, preferreably people that mostly read normal words, try to read them, if they missed any letters, try and improve it. reiteration and tiny modifications help so much, even the tiniest of changes can help. sometimes we may be tunnel-visioned into thinking our ambigram is legible, because we know the word already, we see what it's supposed to look like. but when you get opinions from others, its almost like getting a new perspective, the ambigrammists equivalent of flipping a canvas. there are also communities dedicated to creating good ambigrams out there! (to name some, Ambigram Aficionados the discord server and ambigr.am the website, both of which are linked if you want :3)

3. know the methods!!

there are two main methods that ambigrammists "officially" recognize, downstroke matching, and shape matching

shape matching

this is the more freeform of the two methods, providing more space to do whatever, and thusly, maybe come up with either cool new stuff or bad new stuff. this matches "shapes" of letters, straight, curvy, half curve, spirally, etc etc. this one takes more experience to master, but if done well works wonderfully. heres an example with "greener"

(hey, look! weird R from earlier!)

downstroke matching

is one of the easier of the two, and most often than not yields the best results. in essence, letters are broken down into their vertical strokes, which are then "cut in half" and aligned to each other. this comes from the notion that people read the top parts of a letter more than its undersides. so, when flipping, all that crazy stuff that used to be on the top is now on the bottom, becoming flourishes and designs. this is kind of a precursor to shape matching, as if pretending all letters are squarish before actually taking into account their shape. an example with the word "Basket" would be:

this of course, has its downfall in curvy letters like b and o, as these have specific curves to follow, which may get lost in how strokes are made straight. i got lucky here with the e curving the same way the B would normally, but this isnt always the case.

the best ambigrammists tend to find a good balance between the two, making sure both form and style are as optimized as possible!

finally,

4. not all ambigrams are possible*.

*as a normal rotational

unfortunately, jojo, hello, uwu, and many more words aren't (currently) possible just because of how theyre built at words. so don't be disappointed if some seem impossible, because (like chloe *wink wink*) they might just be. you can then resort to different types of ambigrams, or different modifications!

here jojo works okay as a lake, uwu works perfectly and naturally as a mirror, and chloe and hello work as chain rotationals! another somewhat crucial element of making an ambigram work is flourishes. these help hide the modifications made to a letter, almost like camouflage, or even to hade a letter itself. here are some examples:

this one uses a curvy flourish for the hoops of the Ps, tiny dots for the i tittle and the Es midline, and a bit more flourishes to hide them like serifs and extra curves

this one turns a C into a drawing of a cockatoo! the flourish being the cockatoo, hiding the otherwise awkward C

this one's rather extreme, S and e being turned into flourishes. these are then surrounded by more flourishes to hide them, which works semi-okayly

thats all i think i know about ambigramming, i hope it was semi-useful!

(find me on ambigr.am at chump, and discord as shin_dig :3)

bonus resources: John Langdon (ambigram god)'s advice: https://www.johnlangdon.net/thoughts/advice-on-ambigrams/

Write Words Make Magic (who's also on here @writewordsmakemagic! makes much more in-depth videos on downstroke matching and ambigrams in general on youtube and tiktok)

#ambigram #art #calligraphy #digital art #my art #rotational #ambigrams

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weirdbabs · 1 year

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i will say, now that ive had time to ruminate on it a little, i dont really like what the show is doing with the fireflies. we havent seen much of them, just in the boston episodes, but what little theyre giving me and how theyre portraying fedra as well is making me 😬 a leeeetle bit sus

gonna put this under cut bc it got Long

i mean. right away theres a difference in how were exposed to them in that the game gives us news clips letting us know whats happened over the 20 years, how cities have been placed under marshal law, how riots have broken out as rations hit all time lows, how the fireflies started fighting back and how their public charter calls for the return of the branches of government, how fedras started holding public executions for “alleged fireflies”. the show doesnt give us anything like that, instead shows us that little boy who they let in and test, before promising that they were going to take care of him and he was safe now only to cut to the burn cart/pit where we find his body is. sure that lets us know that theyll lie and promise to protect you only to kill you but you can argue in their favor. he was infected, theres a short incubation period and who knows when he was infected, they did it in a gentle way (seems like euthanasia), they made an effort to help him. they saw this boy faint and they brought him inside the qz. the game fedra wouldnt have let him in even if there wasnt the chance he was infected, there were issues with rations as it was.

there are changes in what were shown of fedra too, little but they add up. we dont see them pulling people out of a condemned building and shooting anyone who tries to run/resist. we dont see any evidence of people being selected for “outside work duty”, but instead see people volunteering for work in hopes for extra ration cards. we dont see the ration line that hasnt opened yet, that people have been waiting in for who knows how long bc theyre running low. dont get to hear the guy telling his friend to keep his voice down when complaining about fedra bc otherwise he might die. sure they still have their public executions for unauthorized entry/exits of the qz, sure they still hold tess in a cell overnight bc they think she might be a firefly, but theyre still shown overall in a kinder light

and then we have the introduction of the fireflies. in the show theyre holding ellie, chained to a wall, who we learned they snatched off the street. they leave her like that, come check on her once or twice a day, take notes and leave. they dont even give her a change of clothes based on the fact shes wearing what she was when she was bit. i didnt see any bucket or anything so i dont know what they were doing for her bathroom situation cause they sure as shit werent gonna let her out of their sight. when we meet ellie in the game, shes free to move about the room shes hiding in as she wishes. shes hiding there by choice, bc she specifically sought marlene out after she was bitten. she knew for about 3 weeks that she could be the cure rather than finding out the day she was being shipped off.

when it comes to meeting “the queen firefly herself”, marlene is shown in show to be strategic and cunning. shes planning on how to get her troops out of the city by causing as much chaos as possible, spread the fedra soldiers thin and hope to keep them distracted so they can hopefully sneak out unnoticed. in the game theyve been planning on leaving the city for weeks (presumably from the moment she realized ellie was immune) and they went quiet. but fedra needs a scape goat, they need someone who they can blame the problems on, someone other than themselves who the qz can hate. so theyve been picking fights, hoping to rile them up. the fireflies are in a desperate situation trying to defend themselves rather than taking a stand

and then of course you have them changing it from the fedra hunting joel, ellie, and tess down under the assumption that they were fireflies (tying into what is reiterated throughout the game: that people are just as dangerous as the infected) to a hoard of infected chasing them, and removing the fireflies helping overthrow the pittsburgh kansas city qz (who wanted them to help take the fight to other qzs, and were instead captured and hung by the citizens)

and then in episode 7 they made one of the biggest changes yet in terms of the fedra/firefly dichotomy. in the show, the mall has recently been hooked up to the power when fedra opened a new block of buildings, which allows riley to show ellie the best day of her life. she knows about whats in the mall bc shes been stationed there by the fireflies, this 16 almost 17 yr old is stationed there alone in a building that hasnt even been properly cleared.

but in the game its a completely different story. the mall didnt suddenly gain powere, its had it the entire time. riley reveals this to ellie and we learn that fedra has the ability to provide power to every part of the city, they just say that it doesnt work as a way of controlling the populace. the fireflies dont have anyone stationed there, fedra do. a soldier named winston who was there to prevent people (and infected) from sneaking into the qz, who riley and ellie were sorta friends with and who taught ellie how to ride a horse.

by making those changes in left behind, suddenly you can make the argument that fedras not that bad. sure in some places like the kansas city qz theyre terrible but in others theyre actually trying to help the people! look how they expanded the qz! they got the power up and running and suddenly places like the mall work bc of that! look at the soldier who gave the warning to joel! sure he doesnt want to lose his supplier but he didnt have to give him the warning! and inversely you can make the argument that the fireflies are just as bad. look how they left a 16/17 year old alone with bombs! look how they open fire on the streets without care of whether they hit civilians! look how they view their personnel as expendable!

it feels like theyre gearing up to be like “actually the fireflies are just as bad as fedra” and im afraid if they go that route theyll have some shit take like “fighting your oppressors using aggressive/violent tactics makes you just as bad as the oppressor” or “if the fireflies make a cure theyll use it to ensure the people are under their control” or some shit like that

#putting it under a readmore bc its long and i doubt ppl want to have that clogging their dashes #also: apologies if this doesnt make sense. i tried to stick to a train of thought but. idk if it all came together if that makes sense #the last of us #tlou #it also feels like theyre setting up marlene to be the straight bad guy rather than the anti villian she is #true fact! i dont actually have any beef with the fireflies as a whole! i dislike the doctors for personal science reasons but like.#the fireflies as an orginization? no (altho maybe the ones that have been away from the qz for a long time. they seem to be Judgy imo)

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certifiedceraunophile · 3 years

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Hi! A fan of your writing here. I just love the way you write Caroline. An Avoidable Heart is my comfort fic and I am constantly in awe with the way you write and craft the dynamics in that story. Caroline's inner monologue is just priceless and God! I just love that intro scene where Caroline is walking into the Mikaelson compound with vampires and hybrids in the surrounding ready to pounce on her.

I would love to hear how you would have visualized Caroline crossing over into TO or not? Like in what season and why? How it would have likely gone?

Thank you!

First of all lovely anon gimme a moment to breathe, asdfghjkl why are people so lovely 😭😭🥺✨ It means sooo much to me that you’d take the time to jump into my inbox and send these kind words, like please I’m not worthyyyyy, But you make me smile and feel really freaking warm so *handcuffs your hand to mine* you aint leaving 💖✨💞🙃

But OK ALSO oh my god dude THAT CAROLINE WALTZS INTO THE COMPOUND AND TAKES ON A COUPLE HUNDRED VAMPIRES BY HERSELF SCENE???? Ughhhhh I’m sorry but I have SUCH a boner for Caroline in that, like my badass -I admit kinda op- QUEEN IS HERE and she’s fucking shit up, I’m sorry but I love that scene so much it’s so dear to me I was killing myself over how self-indulgent and grossly Over powered Caroline is but like idgaf man it’s such a hot scene and Caroline is practically invincible and we just love to see that, so seriously lovely anon, you telling me you LOVE that scene??? Puts the biggest smile on my face and reassures me a LOT bc I was whining and cribbing over how absolutely unbalanced that scene is to literally everyone BUT LIKE YOU JUMPING OUT OF NOWHERE and pointing that exact scene UGHH…...meant to fucking be the both of us 💖💞✨

And ALSO Caroline’s monologue is quite honestly the easiest inner monologue out of the three voices I wrote for that work, Klaus’s is the real pain in the ass tbvh like it is NOT easy writing pretentious besotted losers with a Kardashian complex especially when you need to make them sound cool when they’re the lamest OP dude bros to ever exist - and no I don’t hate Klaus although I seem to try my darndest to convince ppl I do- I just personally believe that a feral fucker like that with a thousand years of existence under his belt can grow a pair and graduate from his kindergarten level of emotional maturity to adult sometime soon, But then on the flipside he’s so grossly adorkably smitten and feral for Caroline plus hella horny for her all the time that its usually easy to write the trashed and devoted idiot he is into something pretentious and powerful and potent when relating to his unflappable arrogance and his narcissism, but sometimes I also need him to be *deep* and ffs profound for the sake of the plot and jfc my muse just wont work with me on that, she’s like I’m sorry I’m not about to bust my ass to make this mongrel intelligible like no sir all I wanna do is make him uncomfortably horny for Caroline and leave him like that.

So smh yeah the struggle is real….but lmao Caroline is just so precious and fiercely protective and just so achingly lonely in that story, so desperate for connection and trust and intimacy yet so guarded and impervious to everyone like it hurts me to write her like that but it really challenges me as an author to balance out her inherent light with the “void” I create in her and through her, so yeah it’s a very fulfilling task and I wouldnt change it one bit, and also I had to balance out her physical op-ness w half a millennium of the ugliest emotional trauma lol so I guess that figures, but the point being….once again I am overjoyed knowing that you liked a facet of the story that I tried so hard to make as authentically Caroline and achingly real and moving as I can and I cannot possibly feel more accomplished than rn for it so ty ty ty ty for reaching out to me and telling me *tackle hugs* It makes me GIDDY knowing that you enjoyed that particular part of the story like ugh stab me please you're too sweet.

And ok NOW, coming to The Originals part of the ask, (also please note that when I say TO headcanon; Hope does not exist, Hayley is a dead in a ditch and ofc Klaus will stop being that lil bitch they tried to pawn off as Klaus in TO)

HEADCANON 1

Honestly my biggest headcanon when it comes to TO crossovers somehow always include non-humanity!Caroline like it’s just so perfect to me?? The opportunity to make shit BLOW UP b/w them like imagine the DEBAUCHERY, the heat, the SEXUAL TENSION, the repression of one Klaus Mikaelson, the EXPLORATIONS, and omg the role reversal when Klaus has to be the voice of moral reason between them and not bc he believes Caroline would not be able to stand herself if she does something heinous and monstrous but bc he wants her to be completely and utterly herself, and yk *aware*, when she DECIMATES ppl to the ground and is in full-on predator mode, like he wants her monster to come out and play with him when no part of Caroline is locked away or suppressed, so obviously when she is w/o her humanity KLAUS exercises restraint on her behalf, like can you imagine that, Klaus restraining himself and being the vague, extremely broken and just largely inaccurate moral compass between the two of them for ALL the wrong reasons- and the entirety of NOLA just standing there watching him herd this baby vampire who seems to be intent on riling him up and angering him when all she is doing is giving him a massive hybrid hard on, like IMAGINE THE GOODNESS of non-humanity Caroline wrecking NOLA and Klaus letting her wreck it bc he is helpless in the face of Caroline Forbes and also bc he is quite honestly *enjoying* the debauchery himself so why put a damper on the festivities.

-I might wanna add that I favour this headcanon a lot bc I genuinely do not even remotely *like* the idea of NOLA as Klaus's chosen place to set his roots so like I would love Caroline going to NOLA and destroying everything there just bc I detest NOLA and the storyline behind it in TO. (yes is it petty? Obvi, but like I am a petty soul and I make no apologies ma’am)

HEADCANON 2

So yeah that’s my main TO headcanon, but my other one being, one I talk about very frequently, scream about in tag rants to an obsessive level, and like this is a cracky one but still very valid, where Caroline rolls up to NOLA humanity intact and all, finds Hayley preggo and is just laughing her fucking ass off bc anybody ANYBODY, with half a brain and a two minute convo w klaus would know how UTTERLY stupid the entire baby shit is especially when it’s with an immemorable one night stand, and Caroline’s just losing her shit about how like an entire city is obssessed w this baby and she just straight up tells Klaus he’d SUCK as a dad (which he really does tho like he was a shitty fucking dad canonically too) and Klaus is just like *sigh* girl tell me about it. I mean basically he’s finally relieved that someone is on his side about the whole baby thing and how he definitely does not want his entire millennium of life to finally sum up to this one squalling leaking stinky infant/unicorn Hayley is apparently baking in her oven, and I say this headcanon is cracky bc klaus would never have put up w this mess long enough for Caroline to come in and sort it out, there’s this preferred method of disposal of his called heart ripping that would've been employed quite early on and honestly saved us all a lot of brain cells and minused years of life, bc let’s be real any Klaus who’s NOT a lil snivelling bitch wearing a Klaus skinsuit would’ve yeeted the baby and the mama first chance he got, and that’s just how I see it.

Lmao I really hope I didnt scare you away w my *strong* opinions Ik they can be a bit much but I enjoy having them so theyre not going anywhere, anyways this ask answer got WAYYYY too long but I’m hoping I answered your question well with this or atleast left you slightly confused and bemused over my feral screaming....either ways I’m really really really happy to have got your ask and the chance to rant so much bs, Twas cathartic and honestly I had nothing to do today so I was more than happy to dish this baby out for you. Thank you so much sweet anon for putting a smile on my face today I am absolutely HONOURED by your words you’sa cutie 💖💞✨🗣🗣

#first of all #LONG POST #second #I did rant a LOTTTT more than what was prolly expected but lmao am I sorry?#no #anyway so those are my general drivel-tastic thoughts straight from glitter graveyard brain #hope you enjo navigating through so much bs anon #and I hope someone puts a smile on your face that's as large and bright as the one you've put on mine today #anon asks #ask certified ceraunophile #anti the orginals #tvd headcanons #tvd #klaroline #anon youre the sweetest #shakes hand cuffed hand #you stuck w me lovely #💞💞

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thoughts-of-the-unheard · 3 years

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oh nothing in a book has ever made me as angry as fucking pissed off as i am now about the end of chain of iron and i have a lot to say on it (i have more to say on the last few chapters of chain of iron than i did on the entirety of the folk of the air series)

ill start with being glad lucie was able to raise jesse but definite reylo vibes there and im ignoring the end of that so watch me ignore if lucie dies ill be like yea ya know shes just,,, somewhere else but i hated how many secrets she kept from fucking everyone i mean she didnt tell a single person the whole truth of anything shes got secrets on top of secrets and thats not good but hey matthews drinking isnt good either and no one but the lucie and cordelia ever really say anything about that so theres that and im not counting james’ you dont love anyone as much as you love that bottle or w/e he said bc that wasnt talking to him to try to help and get him to stop drinking that was just a hit bc they were fighting and i hate that i hate that they were fighting bc they wouldnt have been if it wasnt for that fucking bracelet and which has caused so many fucking problems that i could cry in indignation bc its not its not fucking fair james spent the last what three years of his life in a fog not being able to feel and not being able to notice his parabatai slowly spiraling into a drunken depression from something thats not his fault at all i mean yes it is his fault that his mother took the potion but it is not his fault that the baby died thats no ones fault but whoever sold him the potion and yea he shouldnt have bought it in the first place but he was kid and he thought that was the only way he could get the truth and its unfair its fucking unfair and alistair god alistair he knows what he did in school was wrong but he saw it as the only way and now hes trying to make up for it and apologise and be a better fucking person and thomas sees that and thomas loves him for that and alistair wont let himself be loved and its not fair and anna oh anna talk about not letting yourself be loved she put on such a good front she did but she shouldnt have ariadne loves her and wants to be with her fully with her but anna has to understand the stigma of that and why ariadne cant come out yet hell thats still a problem today but we wont get into that because anna clearly loves ariadne but shes too afraid of getting hurt again and frankly she should just go for it i mean so what if you get hurt again at least youll finally feel something because i know she feels nothing for all those other girls i know theyre just replacements for ariadne and it isnt fair and speaking of replacements fucking grace fuck grace but fucking grace just casually destroying james life listen i dont give a shit how she grew up i couldnt care less about how tatiana treated her and how scared she was of her because if shed just fucking helped then she wouldnt have to worry about a damn thing from tatiana i mean theres a number of things grace couldve done she couldve told the merry thieves everything and they couldve defeated belial like they are now and then no one would be around to help tatiana and grace couldve told anyone in the clave about all of tatianas shit and then they wouldnt have underestimated her and she wouldve been in a proper prison and thus unable to escape so damn easily and thus not fucking able to get to grace okay shes a fucking idiot and i hate her and i hate reading about her and im fucking disappointed in her for not taking the damn bracelet off okay i had very fucking low standards for her but i hoped she would take the bracelet off and at the very least i thought she could fucking not manipulate him further like god damn girl james is a much nicer and understanding person than i am and he would try to protect her from tatiana if he knew that grace was being threatened by her if grace took the bracelet off and told him the truth he would help her i fully believe that but since he had to find out on his own he was furious as he should be but i dont think he had to be nice to her when she showed up at the end there i mean i wouldve just yanked her in the house and started yelling at her right there fuck pretending his still under that enchantment fuck talking to her in private okay id chew her out in the entryway its not like cordelia doesnt need to know she fucking does and i think her finding out by overhearing james arguing with grace is actually a fantastic way to find out because she gets to hear everything all of what james feels and all of what grace did completely unfiltered not that james would try to hide it from her but hed definitely try to soften the blow and i just think she needs to hear the whole truth and AND i really fucking hate when characters overhear only part of something and assume the worst and run away its so common and i hate it so much and i hate how she ran to matthews because i knew it was going to happen and i knew matthew was in love with her and that it was already straining their bond because no one fucking realised that james was madly fucking in love with cordelia because of that fucking bracelet have i mentioned have i mentioned how much that bracelet pisses me off i dont think i have lets get into it so how james was unable to feel properly for three years and how his head was so foggy he was unable to think properly too and how because of that he missed matthew becoming a drunk and how the merry thieves look to james as their leader so if james isnt saying anything about it then there must not be anything to say and how james was already in love with cordelia before the bracelet and thats part of why grace couldnt control him and how he loved her for years how he was in love with her for years how no one knew this not even him because everyone thought he was in love with grace how cordelia was in love with him but thought he was in love with grace how cordelia got married to him knowing she was in love with him and thinking he was in love with someone else how she could tell he wanted her but thinking he just wanted her body and that he was still in love with grace how she’d rather have some of him than none of him at all how he picked out everything in their house with cordelia in mind how he remembered that she loves chess and she never thought he would how he learned a whole other language for her how he immediately checks on her after every battle how everyone, especially cordelia, just writes all this off as who knows what because he cant be in love with cordelia if hes in love with grace and hes obviously in love with grace how no one could ever notice there was something wrong because they were feeling the effects too how james was so in love with cordelia that that love unintentionally broke an enchantment made specifically for james by a Prince Of Hell one of the most powerful beings the entire species will ever meet and i think that covers the gracelet situation but i keep thinking of the scene where the bracelet cracks when grace first went to curzon street and kissed james and james’ mind literally thinking it was cordelia because who else would he be kissing and afterward grace saying ‘i dont know who you think you were kissing, james herondale, but it wasnt me’ and im like damn right bitch get fucked but back to cordelia running to matthews okay i know she didnt know matthew was in love with her so she wasnt doing anything wrong going to him but i kept thinking they were going to kiss or something because we all know matthews in love with her and there were a bunch of hints that cordelia might be attracted to matthew and she was upset about james and i just kept thinking something bad would happen and i was right but shit i didnt think id be like that i had no idea matthew was leaving for paris and even less of an idea that cordelia would join him and the thing is i cant even be mad i cant blame her i would probably do the same thing hell id probably ask to go with and im very proud of her for saying she’d go If matthew stops drinking i really appreicate that and i hope he gets better but the all those misses how james left the house only minutes after cordelia and arrived at matthews only minutes after they left and how he could see them at the train station could see them getting on the train and leaving and leaving him behind because his sister is missing and he shouldve ran and caught them and begged them to stay if not just to help find lucie because they both think of lucie as a sister and they absolutely wouldve stayed to help her and then there would be the chance for james to explain the gracelet situation and everything would be fine it would fine eventually and everything would be okay but NO and ive said a lot but i havent even mentioned cordelia being a paladin for fucking lilith yet where did that come from i was not expecting that ill tell ya see i thought it was odd that wayland the smith would still be alive and that it wasnt mentioned in any of the other books and i thought it was odd that some apparently god-like blacksmith would be wearing such an elegant jeweled necklace and i thought it was odd that magnus would be back from the spiral labyrinth for just a day and would be staying with hypatia instead of ya know his own place but shit id never have put it together as one person let alone lilith and i cant say it came out of nowhere because it said that edom used to be liliths so it would make sense that she would want belial gone so she could have it back but still that was unexpected but im not disappointed i mean im obviously upset that cordelia is now pledged to the mother of demons and feels like she cant even touch a weapon speaking of which what did she do with cortana where did she put it she said she dealt with it which makes me nervous but we know she couldnt have broken it or anything a) because i dont think she physically can and b) emma has cortana later but i think cordelia should keep cortana close since its the only thing that can mortally would belial and apparently he only needs one more before something happens im guessing before hes like gone gone so she definitely needs cortana and lilith wants her to kill belial so i think she should and if shes stuck as liliths paladin after that and never wants to touch a weapon again so be it but get rid of belial first ya know anyway i think there was something else i wanted to say but i cant remember so if you read all of this holy shit im sorry thats a lot i hope it was entertaining at least and i hope i didnt also get you pissed off

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miscellaneouslover · 4 years

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Twilight, Rewritten

Bella is the new girl in Forks, but she’s gay. Like mega, mega gay. She’s in the cafeteria and she can’t stop looking at Rosalie Hale and Jessica is like “i know right theyre all hot” bc Jessica may prefer the dick, but if Rosalie told her to run away with her she wouldn’t hesitate

Edward is also really, really gay. Him and Bella become like the best of pals in Biology. Edward still wants to eat her, but he fights it off and instead talks to her and they become inseperable. The entire school assumes they’re a couple, but nah. They just besties.

The first book/movie consists of them bonding and Bella figuring it out early on what he and his family is and she promises not to tell. And it’s good. He invites her to play baseball and she immediately accepts. James, Laurant, and Victoria come along and James still sets his eyes on Bella.

Eventually he bites her and she turns before Edward could save her so New Moon is basically him training her to be a good vamp. Bella convinces them to not ‘kill’ her because it’d destroy Charlie. She tells them she’ll stay in Forks until graduation and then do it.

The Uley pack becomes aware that Bella was turned and it starts a war. Simultaneously, Victoria is out for blood for the murder of her mate. That’s the story for New Moon. Anyway, at this time, Jacob comes to warn Bella because he’s still her best friend and he wants her to be safe, even under these circumstances. Because, you know, he’s New Moon!Jacob and not an asshole just yet.

This is where he imprints on Edward and that just brings up another problem. For the first time in history, a werewolf imprints on a vampire. Now Jacob has to decide what to fight for. His brothers or who he is meant to die for and protect.

During this time, Jacob becomes attached to Edward and the two come together rather quickly. Bella is v supportive but she doesn’t have the heart to tell them both she think Jacob smells like shit. Like during the whole book/movie her thoughts consist of how cute they are but Jacob smells bad

Sam becomes aware they can no longer hurt the Cullens under these new circumstances and, instead, they turn their heads to the common enemy that is Victoria. New Moon ends with a meeting between Sam and Carlisle. It’s very tension-y

Eclipse is where we see the pack and Cullens come closer as allies. Don’t mistake it for companionship. At this point, Bella has complete control over her abilities and she’s now one of the strongest assets her new family has, other than Emmett. Jacob and Edward are going strong with little issues other than Edward’s brooding ass and Jacob worrying about Victoria.

Carlisle and Sam are constantly away trying to discuss what is needed to do, especially with newborns appearing now and having to deal with two problems at once, unbeknownst that it’s all Victoria’s doing.

This is where Bella and Leah finally meet. Leah is spiteful and angry still, but she imprints on Bella when the Cullens go to meet the pack at the border. Bella just considers her attractive, but she’s wondering why Leah is glaring at her so badly and wonders why she seems to hate her. Jacob catches on right away.

Now Leah is over more often as discussions over what to do with the newborns commences. Bella is still unaware the imprint happened because she’s a dumbass. Her mind is also overwhelmed with all of her issues: Victoria, the newborns, having to ready herself to ‘die’ for Charlie to grieve, and the looming battle with the Volturi, who she has yet to meet.

In Eclipse, the Volturi is talked of constantly in a bad light. Edward explains they are deadly and corrupt, Aro being extremely dangerous. He’s afraid he won’t be too happy about the Cullens mingling with werewolves, which is why he and the others are so determined to stop the newborns from coming to Forks before Aro comes down and see what has happened.

Eclipse ends with the battle, Bella gaining the ability to fight for the first time after long training sessions with Jasper. She’s a natural. She was frozen in shock when she saw the vampire nearly kill Leah just before Jacob came to her rescue. That is when she finally realizes that Leah imprinted on her. Unfortunately, the two aren’t able to discuss their feelings because Jacob is writhing in pain with broken ribs.

A new treaty is created after Carlisle saved Jacob. Edward had to be comforted by Bella and Alice as he waited to see his mate. Jasper had to try to calm him with his ability, but Edward was forcing himself to hear Jacob’s thoughts, trying to feel the pain in a way that they both could be hurting because Edward was so warped with guilt.

The Cullens and the pack were officially allies after Victoria’s demise and Jacob’s aid. Edward runs in to comfort his mate, leaving Bella to talk with Leah about what was going on because keeping those feelings bottled up was not good for either of them.

Leah admits she has feelings for Bella, but she’s been trying to resent them because Bella was a vampire. Bella doesn’t take offense, saying they could take it slow.

Eclipse ends with Alice having a vision that the Volturi would discover their big secret. And they were coming.

Breaking Dawn starts out happy and fluffy. Jacob and Edward prepare for a wedding and Leah and Bella are finally going strong, happily revealing their relationship to their loved ones. Everything seems to be falling into place but Carlisle explains it’s time to tell Charlie the truth, which meant they would need to leave soon, bringing Leah and Jacob with, of course. Also, they needed to leave to avoid the Volturi since the vision was still fresh on their minds.

In an attempt to keep his son in Forks, Billy tells Charlie about the pack and the truth. He tells Charlie Bella is different as well. Not a werewolf, but she was something. Jacob was furious, but he understood why he did it. Charlie still loves Bella nonetheless, but Edward says he’s constantly trying to guess what she and the Cullens were.

Just as things are beginning to settle down, Alice has another vision. Laurant has gone to the Volturi, and he told them everything. They were on their way. They needed to be ready to fight.

Breaking Dawn consists of the preparation of a war, Edward and Jacob having to put their wedding on hold so they could be ready.

When Aro finally arrives, Bella is in awe at the turn out because he brought all of his followers. He is engulfed with rage upon seeing them and the wolves. He swears to wipe them out. But Bella knows, now after Edward explained to them, he is truly after him and Alice. He wants their gifts, and he will do anything to have it.

The war is bloody and deadly. They lose people on both sides(y’all can decide who dies), but eventually, the Volturi falls. And the field they fought in is engulfed in flames as they put the vampires to rest. It’s not exactly the picture perfect ending, but they won.

Breaking Dawn ends with Edward and Jacob’s wedding. It’s small, only involving close relatives and friends. In the end, Leah and Bella declare they don’t want a wedding. They’d just prefer to stay together forever.

In the end Bella returns to the field that they fought for the war and she has a few last thoughts to herself. She is happy she decided to befriend Edward Cullen. She is happy she decided to be content with her changing. She is happy she fell in love with Leah. If she would’ve gone back, she would’ve done the same.

OH YEAH AND THERES NO FUCKING RENESMEE

Twilight Rewritten . . .

#twilight #twilight saga #bella swan #edward cullen #alice cullen #emmett cullen #carlisle cullen #esme cullen #rosalie hale #jasper hale #charlie swan #jacob black #leah clearwater #seth clearwater #sam uley #paul lahote #the volturi #laurant

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neon-junkie · 4 years

Text

The O’Driscolls Daughter - Chpt.1

Summary: You're Colms daughter, stubborn and temperamental like him, but you've got a kind heart and a soft spot for the poor stableboy that Colms gang torments.

Pairing: Kieran Duffy x f!Reader

Word Count: 3468

Rating: NSFW

Tags: Gang war, Colter, Grizzlies west, Strangers to friends to lovers, Slow burn, Flirting, Masturbation, Fantasies, Arguments, Fights.

Notes: UGH, more kieran stuff? yepppp. I knooooow Colms gang has been around for only a decade but lets just pretend they've been around since before you were born :^) also, I think the Del Lobos don't appear at Lake Cairn till after Chapter 1 buuuut lets pretend theyre there for the sake of this fic.

NEXT CHAPTER | Read on AO3

Colm O'Driscoll has laid with many women, though most were not consensual. You were the product of an odd affair, your mother actually falling for the man in his early years. She left you on his doorstep after Colm turned his back on her, calling her nothing more than a 'whore' and 'pity-fuck.' You had no idea who she was, and wouldn't be surprised if Colm had killed her long ago.

To everyones surprise, Colm actually took you in and raised you within the gang. He was a lousy excuse for a parent, barely being there for you throughout the years. You had no treasured memories of him, nothing normal like reading bedtime stories to you, playing games with you, spoiling you on your birthday. There were memoried you tried to treasure, like him teaching you how to shoot, hunt, and kill, but they were definitely not normal. Unfortunately, you had picked up a few of your father's traits, but thankfully not all. You were short-tempered, not afraid to snap, and would shoot first, question later. Oh, and you were just as wanted as Colm. You saw your first ever personal bounty poster at the age of ten. Colm had framed it in his cabin; that was one of the few times you'd seen him so proud.

You're in your early twenties and arguably second in command within your father's gang. Colms other right-hand man, Tom, considered himself to be next in line since he had known Colm since before you were born. Yours and Toms' relationship was... heated. Colm knew the two of you didn't get along, yet would snap at the two of you to 'put your fucking differences aside' whenever he needed you to work together. Colm would usually have to pick one of you to take charge, taking it in turns. Fairs fair, I guess.

Here you are, returning from a failed mission. Colm had asked the two of you and some other disposable men to track down the Del Lobos hideout and clear it, seeing as your hideouts were far too close together. You approach your gangs current hideout, a camp just southwest of Lake Isabella. Yes, it was fucking freezing up here, but Colm ran up here to escape the Pinkertons on his tail. Sadly, his gang wasn't the only one with that idea, but it seemed to work. No one had found you all, yet.

You dismount your horse just as they're riding into the stable, leading them into a pen and hitching them. Tom follows behind, hitching his in a pen beside you.

"You better clean this nag good, boy," Tom shouts over to the stableboy, currently cleaning another horse.

"I will, Sir," he responds.

You don't know his name, he's only been with the gang for a few months. He seems like a bundle of nerves, constantly shaking and flinching around everyone. The men loved to pick on him, they loved watching his tail shake in between his legs as they torment him. You'd seen him get hit over the pettiest of things; their saddles not being clean enough, the horses having a tiny knot in their manes, a nail on their hooves being a centimeter out of place.

You remembered the only time one of the men tried to hit you. You were in your mid-teens, starting to find your role within the gang. One member had challenged your authority, claiming you were just a child and that 'Colms daughter should get no special treatment.' He had gone to hit you over some petty thing you barely remembered, but you did remember the look in his eyes when you gripped hold of his hand just as he tried to swing for you. His wrist felt like it was going to break as you'd tightened your grip. To everyones surprise, you kicked the back of his knee, causing him to fall to the ground. You then let go of his wrist, shoving him forward so he lay flat on his front. Without thinking, you stomped hard, feeling the crack of his bone as you snapped his arm like a twig. It all happened within a matter of seconds. You weren't thinking, enraged that not only was this man constantly picking on you, but had tried to put his hands upon you.

Colm had stormed out of his cabin after hearing the commotion. You were quick to explain what'd happened, the other men watching backing you up. Colm scoffed at the man crying on the ground, telling him to 'get out of my sight.' The guy quickly got up, gripping his broken arm, and ran as fast as he could. Your father seemed proud of you, putting his arm around your shoulder as he lead you into the cabin, fixing you a drink to 'celebrate.' The only other man to pick on you was Tom, though he mostly just said small petty comments behind Colms back. You'd called Tom out in front of your father many times but Colm never seemed fussed, probably not wanting to pick between the two of you.

"You fuck up like last time and I'll beat you till the snow turns red," Tom threatens him.

"Lay off, Tom," you order him. Tom snaps his head over to you.

"Oh oh oh! You soft for this pipsqueak?" Tom laughs, pointing at the stableboy who looks rather uncomfortable. He stays silent, watching the two of you bicker.

"I'm soft on no one. You just pick on anyone you view as lesser than yourself. You must have a lot of confidence issues, Tom," you smirk at him, heading out of the stables with him on your tail.

"I ain't the one with confidence issues here, girl. Just cause you got your whore mommas ugly looks don't mean you can take it out on me," Tom replies, following you over to Colms cabin.

"Why you usin' my insult against me? Can't think of your own?"

"I... what? No. I ain-" you cut him off.

"There there, it's alright, poor little Thomas," you taunt. That was a name that always made him turn red. You look over your shoulder to see that exact expression growing on his face.

"Now you better stop with al-"

"Tom. Shut up," Colm says as the two of you enter his cabin, Tom barking down your ear, not giving Colm a good impression.

Tom huffs but remains silent. Colm looks at the two of you for a moment, sat down at his table. The three of you remain silent until Colm snaps.

"Well? How'd it go? I'm gonna guess from the arguin' and silence that you fucked up," Colm half-shouts.

"Tom fucked up. Again." You state. Colm draws his gaze away from you, over to his right-hand man.

"Now hang on just a damn minute. There's a good fucking reason to why we fucked up."

"You, not we," you correct him.

"And that reason is...?" Colm's losing his patience.

"Well, we took out most of em, till THE Flaco fucking Hernández showed up. Killed all those men we took with us. We bolted just in time."

Colm can't be angry at either of you for this. Flaco was one of the world's most famous gunslingers, the 'Terror of the Grizzlies.' Just about anybody would lose a fight against him, including Colm himself. Colm sighs, rubbing his temples in frustration.

"You're sure it was him?" Colm asks, looking down at the table.

"Not unless you know any other giant Mexican outlaws, yes," you sarcastically respond.

"Great. The two of you, get outta my sight. I gotta think about how to deal with this."

Both of you turn and leave, no one saying a word as you exit the cabin. Tom sulks off, probably going to join his little gang of friends. You make your way over to the stew pot, grabbing yourself a bowl of whatever was on the menu today. You're quick to eat, wanting to check on your horse after today's shootout. You heard them whine during the fight but didn't see anything as you were checking on your ride back.

You find your way over to the stables, looking around for the sun to figure out what time it is. She's getting ready to set, her rays peeking out from behind the many mountains that surround your camp. You enter the stable, stomping the snow off your boots as you shut the door behind you. The stableboys not here for once, which is fine as you weren't in the mood to make awkward conversation.

You approach your mount, feeding them a few pocketed treats as you begin to check for any signs of pains or discomfort. You're quick to notice a bandage on their lower leg, your heart dropping as you begin panicking. You kneel down, peeking under the bandage to see how bad the wound was. The stable doors quickly open and shut, the stableboy returning. He huffs into his gloves, trying to blow hot air onto his face to warm his reddened cheeks up. The two of you notice each other at the same time, looking over your shoulder to watch him stand in his tracks, eyes wide. He looks like you've just caught him doing something he shouldn't have. The two of you are awkwardly silent, both staring at each other.

"Hello," you say. You really had no idea what else to say to break the tension.

"Evening, Miss," he responds, calming himself down as he makes his way over to his own horse.

"You taken care of my horse?" you ask him. He looks a little puzzled till he realizes you're on about their wound.

"Oh. Yes, Miss. It ain't nothin' to worry about, just a little scratch but I didn't want nothin' rubbin' against it," he informs you.

"Thank you," you say as you stand up. "Are they okay to ride?"

"I mean, you could, but they ain't gonna be too happy about it," he responds, feeding his own horse a few pocketed treats.

"You ain't gotta answer me like I'm one of them boys. I wanna know the brutal truth, I ain't gonna snap at you for bein' honest and doin' what's right," you inform him. You have a gut feeling that you shouldn't ride, but you want to hear it from the horse master himself.

"Oh.. I err... Well, no. You should let 'em rest a little while. If you take em out in that snow it could get infected," he tells you.

"The honest truth. I love it. Thank you, Mister...?" you trail off, wanting to know his name. You make your way over to him, leaning back against one of the pen fences, watching him fuss his horse.

"Oh, no, I'm just Kieran. I ain't no 'Mister' somethin'," Kieran looks away, looking defeated.

"Yes, you are. You're a man, ain'tcha?" You ask him.

"The last time I checked, I was, yeah," Kieran jokes. You let out a laugh. This stableboy was funny.

"Well then, Kieran, who are ya?"

"Duffy," he responds.

"Kieran Duffy, that's a real cute name," you tell him. "I'd introduce myself but everybody knows who I am," you shrug.

Is he... blushing? Or still flustered from the sudden change of temperature? A wicked part of you is eager to find out how red he can really go, in a flustered sense, not a bloody one.

"Thank you," Kieran sheepishly replies, stuttering a little. "Yeah, I know you is Colms daughter." Kieran seems nervous as he tells you that, which isn't a surprise. You'd had many people cower once they find out whose daughter you are. Sometimes you enjoy it, liking the little power trip you get, but other times you wished you were just some normal girl that lived a normal life.

"Yeah," you laugh. "Don't remind me."

"Oh... Well, I'm sorry, Miss. I don't wanna tread on no ones toes," Kieran replies. He watches you as you climb up and sit on the pen's fence, your legs resting on the wooden plank below, keeping you in place.

"It's alright, darlin'. You ain't doin' anything wrong," you turn to see him going red again. Darlin'? Something tells you this man doesn't get much attention, especially from women.

"Well er... that's good to hear," Kieran lightly laughs. He looks away, pulling out a brush so he can clean his already overly-groomed horse. You watch him, noticing how his eyes flick over to look at you every now and again, face going redder as he meets your gaze every time.

"You're real good at carin' for these horses, you know that?" you ask him, breaking the silence.

"Oh, thank you, Miss," Kieran replies.

"Do my fathers men not compliment you on your work?"

"I'm sorry to sound so blunt, but all your fathers men do is use me as their punchin' bag." Kieran has sadness in his eyes, trying not to look at you.

"Which ones?" you sternly ask, taking Kieran back.

"W-what?"

"Which ones do that to you?"

"I... I don't know many names here, Miss. But you seen it earlier, that Tom fella is one of the main ones. Most of 'em do it. Usually one will start and the others will join in, bit of a gang thing, you know?" Kieran sheepishly replies. He's internally screaming, worried he's just chucked himself under the bus. He can see rage on your face, yet he's not sure if you're going to snap at him for being a tattletale, or snap at them.

"The next time they do that, you come tell me, alright?"

"Yes, Miss," Kieran says under his breath, giving his head a little nod.

"I'm serious. You work harder than most of those idiots, especially Tom. He's a real fuckin' clown."

"Thank you, Miss. I really appreciate it," Kieran sincerely replies, giving you a little smile.

"I'd tell you to keep up the good work but I know you will," you say as you shuffle off the fence, slowly making your way out. "I'll see you later, sweetheart," you say as you exit.

Kierans glad you've left, only because his face is redder than a tomato. Kieran hears you trudge away through the snow and once he's certain you're gone, he turns to Branwen.

"Sweetheart?! You hear that, Branwen?" Kieran asks under his breath, trying to keep his voice down. He talks to Branwen all the time, but only in private. God forbid anyone ever heard, they'd probably hang him for being so 'weird.'

"She called me darlin' too, and cute. And she complimented my work... and she's got my back. What in gods name is goin' on?" Kieran asks, his face still flustered. He picks at his scarf, trying to let some air in to cool himself down.

"What the hell am I meant to do? That's Colms DAUGHTER, and there she is bein' sweet on me! This must be one big joke. I bet them fellas were listenin' in the whole time, gigglin' to themselves," Kieran huffs, trying to make this situation as negative as his mind will allow him.

Branwen gives Kieran a look. If horses could talk, he'd be saying 'don't be silly, this ain't a prank. That woman's clearly got eyes for you.'

"No way," Kieran responds. "There ain't no way a woman like that would go for a boy like me," Kieran folds his arms, leaning back against the fence. He thinks to himself, going over what just happened in his head. He's trying to pick away at it but everything you said seemed so sincere, so kind, so gentle.

Kieran slumps about the stable, lighting a few lanterns dotted about the place. He gets himself ready for bed, lying down on a pile of hay at the back of the stable. His arms are folded under his head, one ankle over the other. He's still thinking about you, trying to convince himself this is all a joke.

It can't be. It was far too kind.

Kieran puts his hands over his face and lets out a small scream, angry that he has no idea what to do. He's had a soft spot for you the second he laid eyes upon you, but quickly buried those thoughts as soon as he found out who you were. Colm will definitely chop his dick off and force him to eat it if he ever caught even just the tiniest hint that Kieran liked you.

Kieran decides to do what he does best, bury his feelings. He rolls onto his side, facing the wall. He tries to force himself to sleep but as soon as he shuts his eyes, all he can see if you.

Kieran then feels the worst thing that can happen to himself right now.

Kierans rock hard, solid.

His boner rubs against the inside of his jeans, urging him to at least get it out so it's not painful. Kieran sits upright, shuffling so his back is pressed against the stable walls. He undoes his jeans, letting his cock spring free and rest against his white shirt. He wants to touch himself, he really does, but he's telling himself off for getting this hard over such a small conversation. The guys so deprived, it's amazing how just a few kind words have made his heart flutter and his cock hard.

Kieran huffs, crossing his arms, frowning with his cock out, waiting for it to go down.

'I ain't... I ain't jackin' off to her. Again.' Kieran tells himself

There's no denying it. Kierans has gotten off to the thought of you many times, though he's not proud of it. He can't help it, you make him feel so dizzy every time he looks at you. He sits there a little while longer, trying to think of anything but you. He looks around the stable and the first thing his eyes come across is your mount, making him huff. How was he meant to not think of you?

'Fine.' He sighs, talking to himself in his head. 'You're pathetic, you know that? Gettin' off to some poor woman just cause she called you a few sweet names.'

Kieran pulls his gloves off, his warm hands wrapping around his cock. He starts slowly, trying to think of anything else to jack off to, but everything flicks back to you. He eventually gives up, allowing himself to really think about you.

'This is the last time you're doin' this,' he tells himself.

Once he's happy with his little self-discipline talk, he lets his mind wander. Kieran allows himself to get as dirty as he wants, but the first thing that comes to mind is how good your ass looks in that tight pair of jeans. Yes, he's checked you out many times, usually as you're mounting your horse. He's often wanted to pull you off your horse, bend you over the pen's fence, and fuck you there till your knees are weak.

Kieran picks up the pace, letting his eyes fall shut and mouth part slightly. He thinks about earlier, how he wishes you'd have called him over to stand in front of you whilst you were sat on the fence. He wishes you'd grabbed a hold of him by his O'Driscoll scarf and pulled him against you, letting your lips meet. He wishes you'd have wrapped your legs around his waist as you made out with him, uring him to grind against you. Kieran doesn't wish for much, but you're top on his list.

Kieran lets out a small whimper, quickly opening his eyes to ensure himself that yes, no one is around. He shuts them again, huffing and trying to remain silent as he continues, starting to feel himself get close. The only person he wants around is you, fuck the rest of the gang. He'd love for you to come in here and put your lips around his cock, he'd probably cum the second your lips touch him.

Kieran lets out a sharp gasp as he cums, quickly lifting his shirt so it doesn't ruin his already tatty clothes. He rests there for a moment, suddenly realizing how absolutely fucked he is. He's got the hots for you real bad, and he knows that if you decide to keep being sweet on him then Colm will find out sooner or later. Kieran reminds himself that it was probably just a one-time thing, or that you were just messing with him.

Kieran wipes himself down on the hay, not having anything else to clean up with. He chucks it away from him, shuffling back over to his usual sleep spot after pulling his pants back up. Kieran lies back down facing the wall, falling asleep a lot faster this time, still thinking of you.

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leverage-ot3 · 4 years

Text

notable moments from The Lost Hier Job

leverage 2.09

(Sophie opens her curtains and looks out the window. A knock comes to the door and she goes to look through the peep hole, then immediately opens the door)

Sophie: Who's dead?

Nate: No, no. Everybody's okay. Can I...

Sophie: Huh?

Nate: I-I...

(Sophie lets Nate into the room)

Sophie: Oh. Y-You scared the life out of me.

HER FIRST FEAR IS THAT SOMEONE DIED OR GOT HURT

SOPHIE IS THEIR MOM FIRST BEFORE EVERYTHING

- - - - -

Nate: Oh, yeah. No, we're doing fine. I mean, yeah. Everything's, I mean, it kind of went from a quintet to what we are now, a quartet. I mean, it's like, we still know how to play. We sound good, you know. But something is, uh, sounding a little bit, uh, you know, wrong.

Sophie: Huh. Well, I hope that I’m, I really hope I’m not the violist because when I was little, my mum made me have lessons, and I was rubbish. I was completely rubbish. I can't play a note. Not a single note

- - - - -

Tara: Either I am in, or Ruth is out. It's your choice. (walks away)

Nate: They are gonna hate this.

[Leverage HQ]

Eliot: I hate this.

Hardison: You do not let Vicki Vale into the Batcave ever.

Nate: First, this is my home, not a cave. And, second, we're not gonna allow her up here.

Parker: Sophie would never approve. Call her.

Nate: We can't just keep calling Sophie.

Hardison: Oh, okay. I see how it is. We can't call her, but you can go off and have a little secret meeting with her.

Nate: Secret meeting? What are you talking about? I was in Harrisburg, researching a client.

Hardison: Wow, ‘cause you know what? (hits remote and pulls information up on monitor) Your passport got dinged going through Heathrow airport yesterday. Heathrow's in London. I guess you couldn't get a direct flight over to Harrisburg.

Eliot: Well, it's hard when you do the same-day booking.

Hardison: Yeah, 'cause you had to go with the -- Did you realize that London is the home of the most surveillance cameras in the world?

Parker: Really?

Hardison: Who feels like playing "where's Waldo"?

Parker: Oh. Yeah. (raises hand)

Hardison: I do. (hits remote to show video on monitors) Oh. There's Waldo right there. Waldo Ford. Oh, oh. Is that big Ben and you? Wow. You got twins and triplets everywhere. And looky there. 11:18 am standing outside of Sophie’s apartment, Looking quite pensive.

Parker: Aww. He's rehearsing what he's gonna say. I've seen him do that.

Nate: All right, all right, all right, guys. Okay. Yeah. You caught me. I went to London. Yeah. I saw Sophie. And she's not coming back.

Parker: Not now or not ever?

Nate: I don't know. And I don't, I don't think she knows either. So, uh, that's that. Could you please take the...

(Hardison darkens the monitors)

parker wearing that bright yellow flannel? adorable

parker and eliot look DELIGHTED as hardison fucks with nate it’s great

- - - - -

Hardison: Tara Carlisle. She checks out. Civil-Rights lawyer, does a lot of pro bono work. Collects lost causes like kittens.

Eliot: Well, she's honest.

Hardison: Crusader. Incorruptible.

(Tara pulls up and gets out of her car)

Hardison: And one sexy librarian

I saw a headcanon that Tara did actually do this on the side for a living, because, if you think about it, could she really fake a file THAT GOOD to fool hardison, the best hacker in the world

- - - - -

we love to see parker in the vents

- - - - -

EVEN IN P R I S O N HARDISON GETS HIS ORANGE SODA

- - - - -

(Frank slides the back from a photo to find a Nazi flag and a photo of Hitler. He carries it over to where Orson is standing between Hardison and Eliot)

Hardison: My god, he is Aryan nation

LMFAO

- - - - -

(Blanchard enters room reading a file. He looks up to see Nate on a ladder tearing pages from a law book and clears his throat. Nate looks over at him)

can someone PLEASE make a compilation of nate’s characters being obnoxious and chaotic pretty please

- - - - -

parker’s sMOOTH exit from the vents into a flip I am in LOVE with her

- - - - -

Hardison: I tied the adoption-Reference number to the medical records of one of Parker's aliases. Social security, taxes, long record of drug offenses. Anybody short of the CIA is gonna believe that is Kimball’s daughter.

he’s so good at this I love it

- - - - -

(hiding behind a broken crate, Lind points a gun at Parker and Hardison. Eliot sees this as he approaches)

Eliot: Nate!

(Lind fires, shattering the passenger’s side window. Eliot runs forward, bends to pick up a rock, and throws it at Lind, hitting him in the head. He fires again, shooting out the tire as Nate runs around the car. Lind swings the gun at Eliot, who catches it. Lind punches Eliot in the stomach and Eliot hits Lind in the face with the gun. Eliot throws the gun down as Lind stumbles back for more)

Eliot: Come on!

(Lind swings, Eliot ducks and hits Lind in the ribs, then pushes him away. Lind turns around and swings but Eliot blocks his punches, grabbing him and throwing him to the ground. Lind gets up and looks at the gun. Eliot picks up the gun)

Eliot: You want this?

(Lind holds up his hands and moves away, running. Nate and Parker move out from behind the car. Eliot unloads the gun and tosses it aside)

when eliot sees the sniper and is terrified? when he manages to pick up a rock and nail the sniper in the face with it while running? his FURY when he’s fighting him? he’ll do anything to protect his family

- - - - -

(Eliot and Parker walk past a sunglasses vendor. Eliot bumps a table for a distraction and Parker grabs two pairs of sunglasses, handing one to Eliot)

Eliot: Are you kidding me? (puts on the glasses) Look at this.

THEYRE SO IN SYNC I LOVE IT

also married complaining about the style of the sunglasses? we love to see it

- - - - -

(Eliot and Parker run through a hallway)

Parker: We're cut off. We're gonna have to get rough.

Eliot: I ain't hitting cops.

(a noise from behind has them looking back)

Parker: I look forward to seeing you explain that

remember that one commentary with john rogers where he said in this scene beth changed her lines/energy to more of a kinky vibe that made the scene that much better? because I do and boy was this scene charged with something interesting

- - - - -

Eliot: All right. Be cool.

(Eliot unloads the gun and catches the bullet)

Eliot: All right. Nothing's gonna happen to anybody. Just settle down.

(The officer raises a stun gun that Eliot knocks out of his hand and Parker catches)

Eliot: You’re not using a stun gun either

(Eliot pushes the officer back and Parker points the stun gun at the officer)

Eliot: Hold on. Stop. Chill. All right? Nobody's gonna get hurt.

(another officer steps out behind Parker, his gun raised)

Officer: Drop it!

(Parker points the stun gun under her arm and hits the officer, knocking him down)

Eliot (to Parker): Seriously? What are you doin’?

Parker: Mmm.

Eliot (to officer): Listen, it's probably best if you pretend that you never saw us. Okay?

(Eliot and Parker move down the hall past the fallen officer. Parker triggers the stun gun again)

Eliot: Stop

parker loves tasing people and eliot is exhausted

- - - - -

Nate: Hey, Parker, forget about the hearing. I need you to do something else.

(Parker pulls files from the safe in Blanchard’s office, proudly kissing it)

SHES BABY YOUR HONOR

- - - - -

Blanchard: What the hell is this? Hey, you don't understand!

(the officers drag Blanchard to the exit)

Blanchard: These people are thieves! I don’t even think that one’s a lawyer!

someone also make a compilation of their marks swearing they’re not who they say they are. I just think it’s funny and chaotic

- - - - -

parker hardison and eliot all walk in together (TOGETHER)

also both parker and eliot are wearing flannel

- - - - -

Parker: I bet you're not even a lawyer.

Tara: Oh. Sophie was right. You are adorable.

Parker: Excuse me?

(Eliot, Parker and Hardison talk angrily at her for several moments as Nate reads what’s in the envelope)

some highlights that I was able to hear from all of them talking over each other:

- Eliot: Don’t comment and say that kinda stuff. You don’t know us at all.

- Hardison: Woah, you’re overstepping here

- Parker: You don’t get to call me adorable. You don’t get to say that.

basically the boys jump to her defense and I love it

also SOPHIE CANONICALLY TOLD TARA PARKER WAS ADORABLE THATS SO SWEET

- - - - -

Hardison: Whoa, whoa, hold up. Mnh-Mnh. Hold up, hold up. What is this?

Tara: Oh, it’s a bill, for my cut of the inheritance. Hey, I’m not a candy striper. This is my job.

(Eliot, Hardison and Parker look at Nate, who nods)

Tara: There. See? We're getting paid already. It's gonna be fun.

#leverage #leverage season 2 #season 2 #leverage 2.09 #leverage 2x09 #notable moments #mine

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the100hurtme · 3 years

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Lol so I finished the second book a couple days ago but here were my thoughts cause I remember them clear as day lollll (this series makes me emo) soooooo A Court of Mist and Fury pt.1:

I KNEW I TAMPON WAS SUS

My autocorrect knew before I did and was trying to warn me 😒

I mean I didn’t like him that much anyway he was so bland and I swore he only communicated in grunts

She’s not a FREAKN toy oh my gosh 🙄

Wait it’s been months and Rhys hasn’t shown up??? How serious is this bargain thing

Wow these Books are🌶🌶

Awww poor Feyre 🥺 can no one here her puking her guts out at night????

Tampon just chillin on the bed can’t even hold her hair 😒

This “protective” stuff is def gonna be a bad shade on him

Who tf is Ianthe

Well Atleast she has a friend even tho sis just popping up out of nowhere

Noooooo Feyre doesn’t seem like herself is no one noticing how this she’s gotten??? Do they not have therapy in Prythian?

Ugh this writing is so good I can actually feel how hurt she was

Damn how do you cope with actually dying and seeing urself and turning into something you once hated???

Where tf is Rhys

Ok like I can cope with them being engaged, but are they really gonna get married???

OH THEYRE GONNA GET MARRIED

SHIT THEYRE GONNA GET MARRIED

SOMEONE SAVE HER NOT ONLY FROM THE MARRIAGE BUT THAT FUGLY DRESS

Awww it hurts reading her cry for help

YES DONT DO IT

FUCK YES FINALLY TAKE HER AWAY RHYS YES YES YES

oh shut up tampon 🙄

Ianthe sus sus for dippin like that

Awww yes rhys take her away from this bitches 🥺

Ok like I know that I want rhys to take her away but seriously tamlin isn’t gonna put up more of a fight?

Ugh yesss Lucien must have been tired for carrying the sass of the book for so long

FINALLY SOMEONE NOTICED SHES BEEN WITHERING AWAY PHYSICALLY AND MENTALLY

Wait how deep is this bargain bond (I’m still so confused about how that thing works)

I still stand by the their mates theory but idk how that works either and he hasn’t mentioned it

She’s so broken she can’t even push back at him damn her fire is really gone

Who’s the girl??? Pleaseeee no competition...

Lol Bruno Mars would def love the night court clothes

He’s having her read and put up shields wow. Also why did no one at spring court teach her how to read??? Like it’s not threatening or physically dangerous... lowkey annoyed with Lucien like the dude almost died cause she couldn’t read how come he’s not gonna teach her...

OH SHES HIS COUSIN aight that’s cool

Wow he’s actually giving her space idk I thought he would bug her a ton that’s really nice

LOL OF COURSE HES HAVING HER WRITE THAT

Nooooo don’t make her go back she’s actually eating and sleeping 🥺

DUDE WHAT WHY ARE YOU INTERROGATING HER

Bruh 🖕

Oop you just know something us about to go down at the tithe

Also for someone who said he doesn’t keep slaves the tithe is a bit sus there 😒

Dude that’s so glutinous to just keep taking and taking like that... if you have all that money why can’t you reduce their taxes!!! Also why is the Tithe so frequent tf

Are they not gonna discuss the wedding thing

Yeah what how are they supposed to pay in three days when there’s nothing??? Like most of the kingdom was under a damn spell

Is Feyre just supposed to be decoration???

Yes! There’s the backbone that we hadn’t seen from her in the last 7 chapters!

Damn tam don’t get your panties in a twist

Oh they are def gonna save her ass later

LOL I LOVE HOW SHE GAVE AWAY THE JEWELRY HE GAVE HER

Sis should have given them her engagement ring 😌

Wait how many powers does Feyre have??? I need a catalogue to list which court can do what... like if autumn can do fire how come dawn and day don’t get fire??? Like I’m sure it makes sense but my mind is tired

Lolllll Alis is a whole mood

Yeah you better be saying sorry tampon 🙄

Does the mans not see she hasn’t painted anything in months??? Like read the room omg

Awww she has PTSD badddd someone come save her :(((

WTF YOU CANT JUST DO THAT DUDE WTF

Atleast he shielded her somehow

HE WASNT THE ONE SHIELDING HER

Bruh wtf is Rhys?!? Or even Lucien or Ianthe do they not like Feyre or something

BRUH WHY CANT YOU JUST HOLD HER WTF fIng horndog 😒

Sis you don’t owe him anything, but she’s so nice for trying I would have dipped so fast

YES RHYS YAYYYYYYY

Dang the clothes are even looser than before 😞

bruh these two are just wrapped in trauma aren’t they :(

Well that picture show must have kept him up at night oof

HOW DOES NO ONE CHECK TO SEE IF SHES ALRIGHT LIKE ITS NOT JUST THAT SHES NOT PAINTING THE GIRL IS LITERALLY WASTING AWAY

I expect if from tampon but damn Lucien is on some thin ice

Bro everytime I read “looks at me with worry” it physically hurts like ouch

Is this just gonna be a thing where she only gets checked on and fixed one week a month just for her to wither away again?

Yeah where is Mor? On the map the night court is so big how many Fae are in this court

The whole invading other people minds thing stresses me out.

Bruh Amarantha was bad and controlled all those courts how can something be worse than that

can someone find out what books Feyre is reading??? Like what kind of books would the High Lord of the Night Court give her to read?

Please don’t let her fall apart Rhys

Dang this book is so realistic that going through that shit can actually haunt you for a while. Most books just skip over it I like that she’s actually going through it thoroughly

WTF TAMLIN

Dude why can’t he train her??? Like she’s losing control of it might as well teach her how to wield it on purpose

Yes Lucien talk to him 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽

They really don’t let her do anything at all, idk how do you live life when you feel utterly useless

Why can’t he just tell her where they’re going???

Ok Lucien earning some brownie points I guess for trying

HE DID WHAT

Bruh WHAT

RHYS WHERE YOU AT

I knew I liked Alis

How come Mor is the one getting her? Ohhhh some other weird court rules I dont understand

Damn that must have been so traumatizing for Feyre

Lolllll Rhys is about to lose his shit and I’m here for it

YES DONT GO BACK YES

YAYAYAYAY SUCK IT TWMPON

WE’RE GONNA MEET RHYS FRIENDS I think he has friends I hope he does

awwwww city do starlight sounds nice

Lol they must not know about this city if they think Rhys is terrible

HOW DOES SHE WRITE THIS WORLD my imagination isn’t even that big!!!

Aight so since this book is hella long expect multiple parts of your actually following along with this!

#acotar #a court of mist and fury #feyre archeron #rhysand #Lucien #tamlin #spoilers #lollllll these books will be the death of me

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mousehole5000 · 3 years

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this is it... the final post.... 226 through THE END!!!!!

this shit with mu qing and the river of lava is SOOOO dramatic im loving it

oh my god theyre on a FUCKING bridge of course they are okay let’s go boys

“You’re right. We’re alike. You think me odd, I think you to be rather weird too.” - so what im getting from this is that xie lian and mu qing are the only characters in this book with working gaydar okay yup got it this checks out

god... the fact that xie lian is ready to be like “look mu qing we can just forget about the past it doesnt matter we dont have to be friends i know you dont like me but im not gonna let you die over it” and then mu qing is like “.... god i really do admire you huh”

“You...certainly...are rather amazing. You’re...also...a better person...than me. Long story short, I...very much wanted...to become your f-f-friend.” - going to think about this for the rest of all time im about to become utterly unintelligible im overcome with emotions

“And, at the end of the white silk band, Feng Xin was gripping Ruoye with one hand while the other was holding on to a steel-faced Mu Qing, and he shouted towards him.” - the fucking IMAGE of this im gonna cry this is everything i could have asked for im so happy also mu qing dangling there like “ welp. guess ill live“

“Feng Xin was almost burnt by that pillar of fire, and he shouted in outrage. “WHAT’S WITH THIS BAND OF DOG SHITS, ATTACKING PEOPLE WHILE THEY’RE DOWN, SO VILE! FUCK YOUR ENTIRE FAMILY!” Xie Lian responded, “IF THEIR ENTIRE FAMILIES ALL LOOK LIKE THAT, YOU SURE YOU WANT TO FUCK THEM??” - theyre so funny!!! and theyre best friends!!! theyre joking together now in the middle of all this i could cry theyre back!!!

“Using sticks as arrows, he held the bow with one hand and used his teeth to bite back the bowstring.” - no clue how practical this is but okay archer boy. hot

i actually have so many little quips between the three of them highlighted but we’d be here all night if i included them all. im literally so delighted by this omg worth the wait

“Each sabre strike slashed to the bone. It wasn’t like Xie Lian had never seen Hua Cheng use the sabre before in the past, but his style had always been easy and leisurely, nonchalant and casual. Rather than say he was handling a weapon, it was more like he was toying with a small knife. Yet those blade marks were filled with killing intent. It was easy to imagine just how skilled the one exchanging blows with him was, and how perilous this battle.” you have no idea how mad i was when i read this and thought we missed witnessing the fight between hc and jw omg

“Behind him, Feng Xin muttered, “Dear fucking god, may all the gods and buddhas grant their blessings, that better absolutely be Crimson Rain Sought Flower, otherwise he’s gonna go mad!” “Stop your rubbish,” Mu Qing berated. “We’re all the gods and buddhas ourselves and we can’t grant shit, just keep up with him! Look at the stumbling way he’s running, he’s gonna trip and fall to his bloody death before he even sees the man!” - okay i know i said no more quips but this is literally too funny i just wanted to read it again

“ However, for whatever reason, that vicious ghost, in its muddled state, took that large group of live mortals under its wing and fled for many days. In the end, they were still surrounded by millions of ghosts, trapped in a dead end, and it was going to be eaten along with those humans.” [...] “That vicious ghost almost made a move against those humans, but for some reason, in the end, it didn’t. It instead used one of its own eyes as the price to forge a blood weapon. That vicious ghost was already forcibly hanging on with its last breath; after digging out its eye it should’ve broken apart completely. Yet somehow something had shocked it, and it instead woke to its senses completely. “ - THIS IS AMAZING ARE YOU KIDDING ME???? IS THIS ALL WE GET ABOUT HIS GHOSTLY LORE?????? HUA CHENGGGGGGGG

“What a terrible offence, his old habit had come out, and he quickly apologized. “I’m sorry! You don’t have to listen to me!” Hua Cheng, however, only smiled happily. “Everything gege tells me is the best advice, so why wouldn’t I listen?” - this isnt the fucking time afjdkfjsdkl they really never stop

“So you can hold the illusion of a perfect Crown Prince of Wuyong to face and dismiss the Jun Wu now. Isn’t that your objective? Did you think I don’t know what you’re thinking?” “THAT’S NOT IT!” Guoshi cried. “Stop getting tied up in right and wrong, victories and defeat, I’VE NEVER THOUGHT THAT WAY BEFORE!” - jun wu only being able to see xie lian as his successor and believing that thats all anyone else sees too... okay

honestly this whole final showdown was a blast i cant put everything in but it was so much fun to read. the DRAMA the LAVA the SHOUTING t

“Hua Cheng had poured too much spiritual power into him. There really was too much, so much that it was completely outside the amount the cursed shackle could withstand.” - okay.... okay... the love you give will set you free... okay....

“With Jun Wu in his grip, he carried both their bodies and forcefully slammed into the incomparably-solid rock wall! He used all of his power in this smash, and in the rumbling and crashing of rocks, he also heard the sound of something breaking.” [...] “A moment later, Jun Wu suddenly asked, “That move. What is it called?” “...” Xie Lian raised his sleeve and wiped away the blood on the side of his face. “Shattering boulders on the chest.” YES!!!!! YES!!!!! xie lian actually lived that life!!!!!! i loved this detail so much

“After a moment of silence, Xie Lian took off the bamboo hat carried on his back, took it in his hand, and covered it over Jun Wu’s face.” - xie lian... good... another detail i love. a hat that protects from the rain, given in a moment of need, even to someone who has caused you hardship... we do not forget the kindness granted to us

“There was gratefulness, there was shame, there was heartache, there was wild joy, but above all else, there was incurable love.” - :pleading: i wish it was just that easy tbh. “i have to tell you about the worst parts of myself” “ive already seen them and i dont care i still love you“ truly the dream

“ It’s been so long since anyone listened to me talk, won’t you stay? Don’t...actually do this. I won’t be able to take it. Twice, it’s been twice already! I really don’t want there to be a third time!!!” - the bit about just wanting someone to listen to him talk... xie lian... :(

emily corpse bride moment.... i knew it had to happen.... butterflies.... death and rebirth.... inevitable

xianle trio bickering about ruoye..... mu qing complaining but not letting anyone else fix it... im so happy

“The Rain Master sat down on the spot, looking like she was going to perform a passing service for her. After all, Xuan Ji was the only one left of the Kingdom of Yushi besides herself.” - xuan ji you sure the hell were... a character. this little moment tho..... yushi huang... many thoughts

“ Who hasn’t made promises, or swore to the mountains and the seas when they were young? Talking of affection, of love, of forevers. But, the longer I hang around in the world, the more I understand, something like ‘forever’ is impossible. It’s never going to be possible. Having it once was already good enough. No one can truly achieve it. I don’t believe in it anymore.” - jian lan im happy for you bummer it didnt work out with feng xin but yeah that was looooong ago. also this quote me same mood kin but its chill. having it once was already good enough

although yeah tbh if theres anyone who can have a forever like that... it would be a ghost and a god

fasdfjadklfj GOD... pour one out for ling wen.. but is that not the truth of this world? the one can be pardoned for being good at paperwork that no one else wants to do? isnt that the plot of the shawshank redemption?

okay but the fact that all xie lian’s friends come to visit him while he waits for hua cheng is making me feel all warm and fuzzy inside.... fengqing coming together to try to get him out of the house but get scared off by his cooking... amazing

“Last time, they spent eight hundred years running towards each other. This time, it only took an instant to fall into each other’s embrace.” - im completely unaffected by this. im not lying i swear (i am lying im very emotionally affected)

okay i love this final wrap up chapter party its so fun. mu qing moving on from the broom thing!!! good for him!! the beggars get their reward!!! the fun ghost city chefs!! SQX!!!! and he xuan is?? here too??? he’s hungry??? fjadlkfjsdl

“The grounds that Feng Xin and Mu Qing had just swept were once again filthy from that giant crowd of muddy feet. Mu Qing gripped his broom, looking like he felt someone had infected him with fleas, and his eyes were wide.” - me when my dad comes into the kitchen when ive just finished washing dishes i get it king

the little folklore bit... fun!!! oh my god its over..... :(

that was really fun i had a blast reading it and on the whole really liked it i WISH soo badly that hua cheng had gotten more outside of being cunty and devoted even tho those are both important i just wish there was more about like how he got by during those 800 years and like did he ever have doubts? what shaped his worldview was it all xie lian or was it his experience as a mortal as well? why is he so mean to e’ming? theres bits and pieces here and there and i know it was already SO long but that really would have been great if there was more about hc cuz tbh by the end, at least for me, the hualian relationship didnt actually feel as fleshed out as the xianle trio relationship like i still liked hualian’s dynamic and it was really sweet how much they clearly really liked each other and everything but i kind of wish some of the other subplots had been dropped or diminished in favor of more hc development i think that would have been cool

but anyway thats some of my thoughts and i really did enjoy the hell out of book 5 that was a riot and uhhh thanks to everyone who read these or commented *lends you spiritual energy through a high five*

#tgcf liveblog #it is Complete i can move on now #i actually have a lot more thoughts about hl because i uhhhh relate. to things. and have opinions due to my experiences #but its also quite Personal soooo i might just keep them tucked away #anyway im freeeeeee #mouse mumbles

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killrockabill · 3 years

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azula redemptive

so this isnt a full redemption more of a setting her on the path. azula is a character i kind of identify with. i grew up in a chaotic environment and learned to “play the game” manipulate lie and occasionally throw people under the bus. at first it was just a way to get through life but then it kinda just became who i was. i have gone to counseling etc but still occasionally wonder if my feelings are real or if theyre just what theyre supposed to be. i was lucky to have people in my life. my uncle irohs but she didnt seem to. here it is.

Azula was never the type for brooding, that was more zuzu’s territory. Tonight was different. She was tired. It had been a few years since the avatar ended one hundred year war. she had barely kept track of the actual amount of time. In the time since however; she had not grown complacent. she couldn’t.

Zuzu had become the fire lord and seemed to be decent enough at it. At least he was capable of not destroying the fire nation with incompetence. While they were never close there was a hint of something in her that could almost be considered pride. No. Pride was the wrong word the feeling was more that of acknowledgment. He and the avatar won and that was the end of that story.

For a time azula was unsure of her place in the universe. She had lived her life to be the true heir, to be ozai. He was a wrathful and petty god and she was his disciple.

“ Why was that again?” She pondered. “Well what else could i be? Zuzu?” She knew she was smarter than that.

Zuko was soft and too stupid to play the game, so she used him. Every misstep, every weakness was a way to save herself from being him. Did she ever feel bad about it? Perhaps a long time ago, not that it mattered. You do something long enough you get used to it and when you get good at it you start to enjoy it. Every maneuver, every manipulation was a victory and nobody played the game like her.

“My shadow lord” a shaky voice called from behind. The cult of ozai must have sent him. They had been useful to be sure, but she hated that name. It reminded her of the darkness within her, the same darkness her mother saw.

“Yes?” Azula spoke finally in an exasperated tone. “What is it? i have no use of any of you right now.”

“F-forgive me. I-I have come to warn you.” he stuttered as though he were shaken by the earth itself.

“You? Warn me? I may not be the fire lord anymore, but i am still one of the most powerful firebenders of this generation. What could be coming that I need worry?!” That was a bit more intense than she intended, but anyone who knew her knew it was her default state.

“N-nothing that i'm sure you cannot handle, b-but as your loyal servant it’s my duty. The ozai followers t-they doubt your intentions. They believe you don't intend to restore ozai to power.”

That was a fair thought seeing as she had no intention of restoring ozai to power. She had used them to challenge zuko and make him grow into the strong leader the fire nation needed. He was soft on enemies, azula being a perfect example, and not wary of friends that could turn on him as they do.

“Hmph, well I suppose i owe you thanks. Tonight you will leave and discard any sign of joining the movement. Live a life well or not it doesn't matter to me” she hated being in debt to someone. Azula could manage some over privileged fanatics, but knowing she’ll have to get her hands a bit dirty is nice.

“M-my lady i-i-i apologize i meant no offense. please i-“

Azula cut him off. “ you misunderstand. Tonight there’s going to be a … discussion, between the rest of the group. Take this and go do whatever it is you people do.” She flipped a gold piece. She couldn't be bothered to remember if he was one of the wealthy members and what's one gold piece. It was his duty to her to report and that should be rewarded. Flies and honey; perhaps if she did that back then those two. NO we are not going there azula scolded herself. Focus.

The man was still sitting there mouth agape like a fool. Was he processing what just happened? Regretting exposing his comrades? If he betrays her and lets them know she's coming she will live up to the darkness that earned her the title shadow lord.

“I don’t know what you are waiting for, but go. I have an appointment.” Azula walked past him. Ordinarily any threat of a stanger betraying her and leading her to a trap would be subdued by their fear of her. Azula learned that was not a guarantee the hard way. Her shoulder aches like an old woman from ty lee’s strike. That wasn’t what azula had heard about chi blocking, but maybe this hit was deeper.

“FOCUS” azula chided herself “her of all people. Yes, I did use fear to keep them in line but I was good to her. I tried at least. There weren’t many who’s tears could get to me. Fuck, enough. You need to deal with these fools”

Azula had reached the door to where the cult of ozai held their meeting. A Modest wooded shack near where Azula was. It benefited them to be out of the way and not get attention. Azula paused and thought “alright put on the scary eyes” before making her entrance. You could hear the conversation screech to a halt.

“My lady! Welcome, what brings you? New plans rid us of your brother?” One finally broke the silence. The fool that was their leader before azula had seized control.

The gaul to pretend like they werent just talking about turning on her. Did they know who they were dealing with? She was no longer princess azula daughter of ozai; she was the god now.

“Its come to my attention that some of us feel breaking my father, ozai out of prison. Let me clear ozai was a fool who bit off more than he could chew trying to conquer the world. He’s weak now spoiled by everyone's fear of him he lost to a child.”

“You speak out of turn little girl. You wouldn’t be so brave as to say that in his presence!” One of them burst out.

“Ah, yes the withered old man that has been in shackles for how many years?” Azula genuinely could not remember anymore. “I am a prodigy trained by the finest benders this nation has to offer. The bender that conquered ba sing se. Even with his bending he lost to an avatar that I beat. “

Azula wasn’t bragging. This was the fight. Subduing them without having to lift a finger. What happens when azula needs to lift a finger? Well, let's say azula would oblige in earnest. She could tell most of them had already seemed to understand. Any of them try something it’ll end one way. She’d won the fight before they could even try; perhaps she should write a book azula mused. “Azulas art of war”.

The only one not to flinch was their leader. His smile from when he greeted her did not waiver. He must have something in mind, as he would have no way of defeating her in single combat.

“My princess, perhaps you’re right there is something unclear about our partnership.” He started, as calm as can be. “ you are a talented bender to be sure, but without your father’s backing you’re simply an unstable little girl. Your usefulness is only in name and furthering our reputation.”

Usefulness? This commoner did not just reference her as a prop in their machinations. This was when azula began to get heated, literally. Around her the air began to warm until the air around her blurred like that of the air around an open flame. The room had become unbearably hot for the others, but azula the dragon she was, could handle much more.

Azula let out a sigh. “Unstable?!? Lets be clear you work for me! Not the other way around. I have seen and done more in life let alone for the fire nation than you will in what is about to become a shortened life!”

Parts of azula began to catch fire as her rage seethed. Zuzu may have been a lame turtle duck of a brother, but he did show her the usefulness of adapting different bending styles. The fire on her crawled across her body into a sphere in her hands. Though the leader had prepared for a direct strike; azula had something else prepared. She slammed her hand on the floor and allowed the fire ball to be pressed on the ground exploding out in a circle around her.

The cabin had caught fire and many of the cultists were sent flying into the walls and scattered like the insects they were. Azula had practiced that move for some time and understood why strong earth benders would use an impact like strike like that. It was an effective way to combine offence and defense, and not to mention oddly satisfying.

Azula may have been willing to kill if necessary but leaving them broken was the better choice. She snuffed out the fire leaving the smoke cloud to cover her exit. That should be a clear message to anyone. Princess azula is done.

Fire lord zuko did not need his shadow lord anymore. Azula hated to admit zuko had become a passable fire lord. The land prospered, and while zuko is about peace hes is firmer on asserting influence in world. The fire nation is still a force to be reckoned with and she was as influential in it as the avatar or that slob of an uncle. There wasn’t much to do here. Azula wasnt sure what the next move was, but there were things that needed to be drawn before action could be taken.

The palace at the fire nation capital. It was much like she remembered less a gaudy statue of her father. The way the paths lead by lantern fire flowed like a living flame. It was soft enough to have a cozy warmth like that of the hearth. If she missed anything the most of the old princess lifebit was how home loosened tension. This unfortunately was not a vacation.

Her brother liked to sit near the water where the woman and him sat. Only two kyoshi to guard him, I suppose if azula was an average attacker that would do. Azula could already feel the exhaustion this is going to come from this

She waited seated at the spot he typically stops at.

“AZULA” ah that raspy broody voice is never, not funny. He growls like a cub caught without a mother. “What are you doing here?! Trying to cause more trouble for me to clean up? Trying to take the throne?

“Oh zuzu all I’m doing is sitting here. Come I wish to speak to you, as civilly as possible. I’ll even allow one of your fangirls chi block my arms.

A laugh broke the tension “that's even funnier the second time around azula” that cheery pitch could only be one person. Azula perked up in her seat.

“Ty lee, im glad you’re here too. Wait that sounded ominous. I mean the sight of you is pleasant.” Not exactly how she thought things would go they were supposed to be separate. “Well that’s best anyway it’d make the noodle arm treatment feel less awkward when it’s someone you know.”

“Hey that makes this easy” with two jabs azulas arms and therefore lightning wre off the table. “I just want you to know. I am still scared of you, but that fear makes me want to stop it.”

“Ah-um ty lee… i don’t expect you to and ill understand if you say no but i'd like to speak with you after.” Azulas voice was gentle when it reached ty lee.

Ty lee paused to glance back. She was shaken at the thought. Of course she would be what else should she be? Happy? She said it herself she was scared of azula and you cant have friends with that or they betray you.

“Lets try this one first.”

Azula was impressed at how ty lee could not only give a non answer and still leave someone hopeful. After the war, thinking through things during training sessions, azula had a new perspective on ty lee. Azula never doubted her prowess for a second, but being such a skilled people reader and least suspect of manipulation. She was everything azula was not and then some. Where azula scanned for weakness ty lee scanned the person. Where azula would use fear to bend to her will ty lee was playing the long game with positive reinforcement. Azula needed her to know that and more.

“There.” Zuko barked. “Now state your business.”

“Zuzu, you’re not meant for impressions, that was the worst ‘father’ i've ever heard. I'm leaving the capital and maybe even the fire nation. “

“Why?” Zuko was confused, what would be her next move. other nations aren’t helpless and its not like Zuko would leave them to her.

“What is there for me here? Zuko, youre the fire lord ive made my peace with that. You were too soft when you first got the throne, and while not all of my actions were always so benevolent; after a while it was about keeping you on alert dealing with the changing world. Making sure you had fangs. Father, ozai, had beat you to submission for so long and only at the end of the war did you begin standing.

“You think you were helping me? Training me in some insane way?!” Azula knew he’d be this way.

“Heavy lies the crown on the head of the ruler zuko. I should know i had it for a couple hours and lost my mind.” Azula chuckled at the memory. A foolish child who had nobody left to manipulate and nobody she trusted, of course shed crack. “You don't have to believe me. Im not sure I believe me. If i couldn't be the fire lord, I'd help mold him, I thought. You're still too soft with other nations in my opinion but you can manage. You’ve proven that.”

“And why tell me instead of just going?” Zuko had began to calm down, perhaps the avatar was rubbing off on him.

“The very reason i had to have my arms chi blocked. You fear me. Sure, you could fend me off with your friends but you know i am not something you would want to face. Now you know you dont have to look over your shoulder, at least not for me.”

“You expect me to believe that?” Zuko lowered his tone. If azula were plotting it could’ve worked here.

“No. I expect the next few weeks you’ll be on high alert. You’ll be upping security in cities and in constant communication with smaller settlements. Most importantly, you will be training. You Want to know that if we cross blazes, you will win. That is why i am leaving that response to an unseen threat? Exactly as a fire lord should be.” He won't look at it practically, at this point what is there for azula to be here. the only reason to keep this up is to take that throne, the one that broke her, it may be rightfully hers but she was not rightfully its. It was owed to her but she was not owed to it.

“Listen zuko, we’ve both seen ozai for what he is. The man who needed his teenage daughter to take ba sing se because he never could. The shortest reigning fire lord who faced an avatar that had only one year of training on the day he was at his peak. He called you a loser, and always asserted dominance because that was the only way to get people to not see the pathetic incompetent man with good enough luck to have me. Looking at you now he missed an opportunity at a useful tool.”

“People aren’t tools azula.” The father talk began to itch at zukos emotional scabs.

“That was the way of the house, and you never learned that. You were too blind or stupid to think ‘whats the right answer’. That is why i was favored. Not luck, i played the game. Not unlike my friend ty lee, there did with me. She saw me.” It appears that azula had some scabs still too. She felt like her skin was raw and each word was hard to spit out.

“It doesnt matter” she took a breath “it would shame the fire nation anyway having to change leaders every few years. Just take my words and do what you will with them.” Azula was done, this had already been more a spectacle than she cared for.

“Ok, now what you stroll out the front door? We should take you in. That’d interrupt your trip. What now?”

“Oh zuzu, you are so on guard still. Good. I’ve an exit lined up out if the way so nobody questions my presence. If you take me in? Why? So i can escape THEN leave? Just extra steps. I dont mind waiting however. I think we both got something from this conversation.”

The air was warm. Unseasonably warm, its him. Azula wondered if this was coincidence or if he made hes own version of her technique. Now azula was tense. Impressive brother, but these are your options.

Finally, a high pitched intervention. “Uhum, fire lord zuko she also wanted to have a talk with me too. Maybe while you think about what to do with her I can see what she wants to say.”

“Are you sure? If she tries something.” Big brother of the year hm. Hopefully mai watches her back azula mused.

“Zuko im a big girl. Plus you’ll be in holler distance. Just keep an eye out.” Ty lee turned to azula. “Im going to sit next to you now, and if you try to bend at me or kick me i will be very upset.” There it was. Azula looked in awe at how she managed to channel a determined child while making it clear there will be consequences for any transgressions. Azula truly was a fool like her father before her, failing to see what’s right in front of her.

“Hi azula. You wanted to talk?” She tried to keep the pep but ty lee couldn’t help but be nervous. Azula was one Of the most dangerous people in the fire nation.

“I did. Thank you. Even though you know there’s a chance i could actually be up to something leading to you or something or someone you care about because all youve ever seen from me is wrath. So, thank you.”

“Ppft, im sorry azula I really am and you’re right i wasnt sure but that awkward rambling reminded me of that day at the beach.”

“ARE YOU MOCKING ME?! I came here and let you chi block me. Do yoy you know what this feels like? Limp noodles where my arms should be.”

“No, no, azula i swear it just shows there's still some of the good in you. Your aura is less vlack more a...deep watertribe navy blue. Theres also the temper still i see” ty lee tried not to give azula a reason to get heated.

“Oh. I see. Well regardless of the context tgat was rude”

“Yes it was, sorry.” She gave azula the eyes that always got to her.

“Its fine. I may have also been a tiny bit intense there.” Azula hated this. She was a prodigy. Which meant apologies and social interaction were unnecessary.

“Ok. Lets try again. ‘Now state your business’” imitating zukos growl of a voice. It got a genuine laugh iut of azula. It had been a while since she laughed at all.

“How do you do that? Just lull people into a state of placation and lowering their guards.” Azula regrouped.

“Its not a trick like you said. Well, mostly not. I do watch people and learn what i can, but its so i dont do anything to start upsetting people. And the rest is just i have a calming aura”

“So you’re just a pure sweet roll in this terrible world?” Azula was proud. She made a quip that didnt sound threatening. That practice wasnt for nothing at least.

“I dont know about that. All I do know is that if we try the world doesn’t have to be terrible. You’ve changed azula. I can see it. Not just your aura either. You meant at least half of what you said i can feel it.”

“Half? That's more generous than i would be in your shoes. I appreciate that and would love to girl talk i think time’s coming so ill jump to it. I want you to know the same as zuzu. I dont have plans for revenge for the prison. I also wanted to say… im sorry. You may have noticed my opinion of my father has changed and as his heir, his duplicate its making me think i need to redefine me. Clearly our way didnt work. I held you and mai by a leash and when it came down to it who do you side with the leash wearer or holder. I’m sorry it happened that way and what it’s probably done since, but there it is.

Ty lee remained silent.

“I don’t expect you to forgive me or even believe me. I just thought, you of all people deserved that much even from a monster like me.” The silence coming from ty lee was worse than any words she could have said. Each second of waiting for any kind of reply was tourture. Ty lee was never the silent type, so as expected she probably won’t accept it. That's fine azula didnt need her to; she didn’t need her or anyone for that matter. Beasts dont always have packs, especially the most vicious ones.

Ty lee stood up and took a few paces. Azula watched and simply thought ‘there she goes. She may be giving azula an out as a courtesy, ehich is more than she expected.

“You're not a monster.” Ty lee's silence finally broke. Her tone was quiet and somber.

“Youre not a good person. Youre Probably one of the worst friends I’ve had, but we were friends. I dont know how much to believe you, but you’ve apologized for hurting my feelings before in more casual moments. The time away may be good for you. I tell you what, I’ll accept your apology for the both of us. I’ll know i gave you one last shred of trust and if how things ended truly bothered you it can stop now.”

Azula was stunned. She shouldn’t have been. That reaction was as textbook as azula threatening a subordinate. Azula should be a little more at peace now, but she isnt. It hurts. Here was a kind strong woman who managed to make something of herself and azula was nothing anymore. A vagrant who couldn’t do what she was raised to do for a few hours. Kindness and compassion were underused thongs for azula but clearly they’re good for something.

“Ty lee” azula choked on the words. How pathetic. How embarrassing. On the verge of tears because she was not a monster to ty lee.

“ thank you ty lee. I didnt and still don’t deserve your friendship, but i think you did something to me. I dont know what, but something. You may go if you wish. I think i want to wait and see what zuko has to say”

“I’ll put in a good word for you. You called him ‘zuko’ most of the time you talked to him. You're a bit confusing right now but I think that might be a good thing.”

“Ha, oh ty lee you have too much faith in people. I could still be the monster in your closet. Don't ever change that.” Azula needed everything in her to not cry, not in front of them. Not again. Never again

Ty lee turned back to face azula. “And you have too little faith. That's ok though, i may not need to change but I really hope you are.” She smile md at azula. It was a soft smile like the glow of a candle in the night and just as warm. How she could manage a real smile towards azula was beyond her. It was beautiful and it had a way of crushing azula.

Ty lee was gone. Not far, as zuko still had to be in the garden somewhere. Azula was glad for that she could breath and focus on the next hurdle. Getting out with noodle arms would be difficult but not impossible. They were so put at ease about the arms they didnt think of any attacks she could do with her legs. If it came down to it she would set enough of a blaze to keep them occupied and run to her escape location.

Zuko and the others returned. He had a stoney look on his face more grim than broody. Azula cant be surprised its bad news, but it was less than ideal. Ty lee stood next to him. Had she kept her word and gave her a chance? Or was that just to encourage me to stay. She had been bitten once and was twice as shy nowadays.

“Ty lee mentioned your talk went well. Im glad you didnt try to kick or bite her.”

“Zuzu, what do you take me for a platypus bear or something?”

“Or something” zuko remarked. It was a fair enough jab azula decided.

“She told me you seem lost in the world. If this is true, we can help. Theres the beach house so you dont have to interact with people unless you want to. We can get you treated like someone in our family should be. You can help us do good for a change.”

“Where do you people get this faith?! I do not intend on being a ward or high end prisoner. I do not belong here, and cannot promise you I’ll be what you want. For all we know i'll turn on you like i have a dozen times over.” Azula could not tell if he really was that foolish or if she should be offended at the patronizing proposition. “No, if im to become something, someone, else it has to be away from here.

Zuko stood silent for a moment. “Very well, but i want you to know that any action against a fire nation citizen is an action on me. the way you and i have been going for years seems to only have one end so i hope you mean all of this. You may go on the condition a kyoshi warrior shadows you for a while.”

“The ones in the elaborate dresses, white, make up and golden fans? Im sure theyll be like a shadow in the night. Though I suppose it could be worse. If i get left alone they will be left alone, just so we’re clear.” Azula hated being followed, but if its just for a while she can put up with it.

“They’ll watch and see if you're just up to old tricks. You'll get a head start and they'll catch up so you won't be sure they are present. If they determine youre no longer a threat they will leave you.”

“Interesting proposal Zuko spoken like a benevolent leader. I accept.” Azula stood up, and was a little off balance because of the arms but they began to come back to her. “I… suppose that's it then brother. I’ll do you a favor and make it so my way in cannot be used again. We may not see eachother again, so farewell. remember, you are the dragon not some toothless herbivore. Dont embarrass us.” There was an awkward melancholy to azulas voice. They were never siblings in the traditional sense and she did try to kill him. A lot. Still, it’ll be sad to not get under his skin anymore even just a little.

“Goodbye azula. I hope you find whatever you’re looking for. If all of this is true my offer will stand.”

Azula had nothing to say. She couldn’t. She fully intends to be gone, and yet he leaves the door open? It’s embarrassing, its offensive, and somehow its cruel. Azula living the rest of her days in a place designed to make her complacent? No. She may not want the throne but she will not be a pet.”

Azula nodded and walked away. He was as good a brother as you could get in this family and she was as bad a sister as you could get in this family. That bridge is burned whether he realizes or not.

Now all that was left for azula was to decide where to go. That entire exchange left her raw and exhausted. Zuko may have had a point, the beach wasn’t far and a small coma would be nice. A stop off there get some nation neutral clothes and see where the wind take her. It was as good a plan as any for now.

When she finally reached the shore and looked up the stairs to the childhood beach house the exhaustion set in. How long had it been since she slept? More than 24 hours to be sure. Azula dropped to her knees and felt the sand beneath her. Soft, like ty lee's smile.

“No.” Azula dismissed. Now was not the time to reminisce. This sand was once a rock. It could have been a rock that punctured war ships sinking them to their doom, or a smaller rock cutting the food of an unwitting beach goers foot. Azula was that rock. Was she being worn down into sand? Was that ok? Everything in this world wears down, so why not her? If she could be half of what this sand was, pleasant soft and comforting perhaps that wouldn't be so bad.

#avatar #avatar the last airbender #atla azula #atla #atla fanfic #ty lee x azula #azula avatar #princess azula #prince zuko #azula and zuko #atla zuko #fire lord zuko #ty lee #ty lee atla #fan fiction #fanfic

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guidedbygunpla · 3 years

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Gundam REDUX Sidestory chapter 2- Funeral for a Prince

“due to the ongoing land war, I unfortunately cannot send you back to the homeland for Garmas Funeral service, unfortunately not even the high command will be able to leave. Even I must stay behind and make preparations for our Temporary Capital here in New York to be moved to Mendocino California. I do apologize to both of you.” Dozle says across his desk to the two in the room with him, Garmas wife Icelina, and Garmas ex lover Char. “I understand completely, we would be far too easy a target for the federation. We need to fortify our positions, and push forward with the invasion of Jaburo.” Char said, sitting up and walking towards the exit to Dozles office. “but what of the man who killed my Garma…..what will we do about them? Chars report said they were loading an airship when he Gram and Garma got there, cant we send a fleet of Gow after them? Avenge my beloved” Icelina stood, shouting at Dozle

“Icelina, you must understand the federations warship out guns any ship we have earth side, its main cannon was able to knock a gow out of the air with a single shot, and our guns do not even scratch its hull, and we are too far away to stage another run on Arnold Airforce base, and even then we have thrown dozens upon dozens of our best mobile suit pilots at them there, and everyone of them have been wiped out…..our hands are tied” Dozle said, sitting back in his chair, tears welling up in his eyes. He too wanted to avenge his little brother “all we can do now is try to complete Garmas dream, and finish the conquest of the Americas, once we take Jaburo we will have South America under our command, then Zeon will control from the archipelago of northern Canada to the tip of Chile in the south. That is all we can do now to avenge Garma” Char said turning to face them again

“and what of the Princes Killer, this sniper? Can we put a bounty on his head? Something to inspire the troops to stop him?” Icelina said tears rolling down her cheeks

“that is a fine idea, honor and glory to Zeon” Dozle said, his voice cracking as tears continued to well in the giant mans eyes. ____________________________________________________

Gihren stood in front of a massive portrait of Garma, and behind that a giant mound of Chinese bellflower, symbolizing Garmas eternal love for Zeon, and his new wife. his speech was more to rile the troops and demand action in his brothers name, his uniform was different though, no longer the red uniform of an officer, but now a black uniform, with gold fringe, and the Zeon coat of arms stitched into it. The arrow the flower and the hawk, all in gold leaf. Char sat watching it at the bar inside the great ball room of the former presidential palace, wearing the only civilian clothes he had, a white suit. The lights off save the screen of the television. He had pulled a bottle of UC0061 Wild Turkey whiskey from the shelf and made himself one whiskey and water after another. He was sipping through his second glass when Icelina sat next to him

“white is a poor color to wear to a funeral Charles” she said grabbing the bottle from Char, and pouring herself a glass, no water or ice, straight up. “I’m not attending a funeral, I am drinking alone at a bar” he said sipping at his drink “I felt that was obvious.” “that tone is far too rude…… figured you would at least bother to show a small amount of respect” “I paid my respects when I saw his suit fall in Kentucky and as I walked back to Civilization. I said and felt all I could on the way back.” He sipped again “right now, all I want is for this charade of Gihren stealing the reigns away from his father to be off this television, and to get back to work.” “he talked about you a lot you know” Icelina said, sipping at her drink

“I assumed, we were very important to one another” Char said turning to look at her, his eyes obscured by his red sunglasses, a tiny smile appearing as he thought of Garma

“so….if you don’t mind me being so frank, were the rumors of you two being…..well, I mean he was my husband, I feel like I should know” “he still is your husband, even in death your marriage bond is not broken, that is one of the core tenants of a Zeon Marriage.” “oh…” “and yes we were together for quite a long time. We met eachother while at the academy, and at first it was just teasing and exploration, but it evolved over time. I would say that before the war started I genuinely loved him…..but those days are over, and that ship has sailed. War changes a man, I am not the same man I was when I shipped out of Zum city and neither was Garma. When we met again at the party to celebrate your wedding, we were to eachother like strangers. Still, my soul aches to know he is gone forever now.” “I’m so sorry for your loss Charles…” she said, setting a hand on his arm “no, it is I who is sorry for your loss Icelina, Garma was a wonderful man, and we were both lucky to have loved him….I am sorry that your marriage, your futures together were cut so short, if only I had seen that sniper before it was too late.” the two sat in silence as the chants of seig zeon called out over and over again, echoing so loud the TVs speakers crackled and popped. “why do you wear sunglasses all the time? It makes you look like you have something to hide” Icelina said, a small girlish laugh in her voice as she finished. The strong alcohol obviously new to the young woman

“they aren’t sunglasses, I’m colorblind, theyre corrective lenses polorized red blue and green lenses so my eyes can better distinguish the colors” “oh so the propaganda about you having been nearly blinded by cosmic rays was true then? A soldier made of Zeons advanced Science” “hardly, I was born like this. It’s a common malformation among those who were exiled from the earth. The rods and cones in our eyes don’t develop correctly due to a genetic abnormality, and without these glasses, green and red, blue and yellow, they all look the same to me. On the battlefield, being able to distinguish between colors of enemy ships and mobile suits can be key.” “is that why your suit is bright red? Picked it by accident or something? Thought it was green like the rest of the boys” she said with a small snort in her laugh

“what? No….I picked it because Red is the color of an officers uniform, also because I just like the color. Reminds me of those old legends of the Red Baron from World War 1, a single pilot that no one could stop. Just seeing a red plane would cause fear. I loved that idea” “that’s romantic Charles”

“….Garma said the same thing when I told him about it” the broadcast of Garmas funeral ended, and the news cut back to the talking heads of the earths media. Talking about how blasphemous it all was, false kings, false prophets.

“Charles can I ask you something….I have studied the Contolistic religion, but I have never understood the seig Zeon thing, I know that Seig is victory in old german, but are we calling for victory to Zeon Zum Deikun? To the organization of Zeon? To the Zabis?

“it’s Victory to the organization of Zeon, named after the man who called himself Zeon Zum Deikun.” Char said as he finished his whiskey and water, and reached over and grabbed the bottle from Icelina, pouring himself a third glass “Zeon Zum Deikun isn’t even the mans real name, he took on the moniker of Zeon, its an old term, it means Boiling water in Greek. It was a term used to describe a rite they used during old church services. Youd take a chalice full of warm water, symbolizing christs blood during the crucifixion, and mix it with wine. He said he was the warm water, the blood of christ, the blood paid by those who were shoved off of earth into space, and he would one day mix with the world again, forming a more perfect whole.” “do you know his original name, I didn’t know it was like the pope, he would just take a new name like that” Char took a long drink of his whiskey “no, I don’t think anyone ever told me his real name, I feel like he let that man die a long time before I was even born…..if you know what I mean”

#gundam #charma

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themeed · 3 years

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damn allowed myself to want things for a day and all i want is a van to live in, knowledge, freedom, weight loss, and a bass guitar.

im. happy with that i think. im proud of me, no jokes. im proud of being able to want things and care about them and vibrate towards them with longing. im... pleased with that. its fulfilling in a way Not Wanting For Anything isnt, because thats... kinda hollow. empty. in a vacant, lonely, yearning and grieving and SAD way. maybe because i Couldnt Want then. i Couldnt Desire or it would be used against me or taken away. that sucks. that sucked.

and now. im free to want again. and comparatively???? i think im very much never going to aim for buddhism or that weird Not Desiring Not Attached Nirvana mindset. like good for u but been there out of trauma and its not fun theres no reason to truly Live. u just float endlessly and experience and it aches so badly!!!! it hurts to want to want and not be able to. and i guess that is different from not wanting at all but... its not different enough for me to justify ever going back to that. or going forward to that. i just got this back and screw enlightenment if it means i have to give up on my passions i dont think life is worth living without it.

and anybody who looks down on that from a spiritual tower has yet to examine their own pride and how empty they feel without it.

anybody who looks down and smiles and wishes me luck on my journey? good for them. im glad theyre living their best life, on their journey as they see fit.

and i feel the need to protect myself because ive been hurt by the pride- the arrogance of others before. a lot of my hurts and traumas stem from my mother being too prideful to recognize that she can be wrong and someone under her power could be correct over her. and it was an uncomfortable truth. so she denied it was one at all and hurt me. i know the reason could be elaborated on. she didnt want to confront her own internal logic. or trauma. or even doublethink. that doesnt excuse her hurting a child for the sake of her sense of pride, of comfort, of self-worth. a child under her power, that she claimed to be parent of. teacher of.

not owing anyone anything is not the same as not hurting anyone. i havent reconciled that yet. oppressors should be held accountable for their mistakes, and give reparations if the harm is physical at LEAST. and i think that applies to politics, yes. privately though? if i beat up a nazi, i dont want to pay for his hospital bills. my personal philosophy struggles between equating people and ideas as a worth measurement, and realizing that that line of thinking is... similar to oppressors. but. its based on something people can change. the question is, do i think "if given the opportunity" is a good enough reason to stop and question a racist that runs their mouth? and do i think pre-emptive violence is okay? if say, a nazi walks into a bar and doesnt say anything but is wearing all the red flags and bells and whistles. i dont think that justifies a beatdown. being asked to leave, sure, but the beatdown doesnt start til the first remark flies.

once the intent is given OR the action is taken, the line is drawn. doesnt matter if they Havent Had The Chance. if theyre starting shit outside of debate spaces like that, and not, say, asking questions, theyre not looking for new perspectives, and it is NOT my job to educate people. its not my job to Show People The Light. a quick fucking google search could tell them why theyre wrong. if they havent put even the most basic energy into questioning their beliefs, thats on them.

it sounds like im trying to absolve myself of blame here. largely because. i think i should go out and help educate people because theyre inherently complacent if theyre, yknow, in a position of power. aka white folk and men and rich folk and cis folk and on and on and on. these people dont live my reality. they dont live the reality of a gay black man in the south, or a genderqueer lesbian in the west, or an indigenous woman whose nation is being targeted, or a muslim woman who cannot wear her headcoverings in the face of danger of death, or an asian immigrant who cant get a job because of COVD age discrimination resurging. we will never live each others realities, but we can become aware of them.

they wont come into awareness without someone asking or telling, and then doing something to change them.

we shouldnt need to go running to people in power for them to be aware of problems in the populace, govt is supposed to help and solve issues like this. like. actively. thats the whole point, make life better for the countrys citizens. and individuals in a position of social power...

are individuals who didnt take on a responsibility to protect and serve or otherwise care for the populace of a nation. i personally think they SHOULD care, but they are not obligated to. i cant make them care about others.

and honestly, on some of them, it would be a waste of time. there are people who want to change or question things and yknow what? they seek out answers. in people or places or online usually. stats and stories.

so like. i dont think someones Potential as a person matters when theres a throwdown about to happen. it really isnt my responsibility to save people from themselves or try to change their sides against their will. if they want to chat about it they can ask questions first.

not throw insults or punches or hatred.

what people have been taught is worth analyzing and trying to correct IN SOCIETY but i cant fix every broken white boy that comes to me. PSAs, fliers, outreach, online videos, debate spaces. those are things i already have access to and can be a part of if i really want to go around changing minds. or yknow. get involved in legislation and be myself around others to change their perceptions of whats socially acceptable or normal. maybe protest, maybe call congressfolk, etc.

but not every comment has to be analyzed or a learning opportunity. im allowed to shut it down, and people can respect that or stop talking to me. this isnt my parents house where i had to justify everything that i said or did when scrutinized, and doubly justify any criticism i had of mother, or any joke i frowned at instead of smiling.

these people dont have that power over me. they arent my mother. they arent my boss, and if they are i can fuck off and get a new job if necessary. they dont have financial control over my living space and food and schooling and physical control of where i can go and with who and for how long. I CONTROL THAT. I do.

Huh. maybe thats why i want a van so bad. i mean... when this lease ends if nobody is gonna end up living with me...

i could just... live in my car and shower at truck stops. get a storage unit for my stuff. save by driving jobs. like 40 to 60 a day. tear out my cars back, insulate it, and install my mattress pad there. water on the floor, cooler next to it, wooden cutting coard, knife, single camping plateware set, and another little shelf for spices. maybe a hot plate i can hook up to the car battery? get a long enough usb and it might be doable. i could go camping and open the trunk to just... vibe.

because yeah, honestly? i dont plan on having a solid apartment for a bit. like a long bit. and i still have like 70000 miles on my car before itll want to go. and by that point, even at like 100 miles a day, thats like 2 years, less if i go cross country in that vehicle. i could save up SO MUCH for a better vehicle, or like. college. live on campus, get some credit, continue working after i figure out want i want to do.

i think thats a solid plan, even if i dont get another apartment and put everything in storage. work as i need to instead of all the time for rent, really only paying for gas, car repairs, car ins, food, and phone data/hotspot internet... that would bring my monthly expenses down to like 500 a month max instead of like 1400. id only need to make some 1000 a month doing contract stuff to save for taxes and stuff. anything extra would be just that: extra for savings and things. holy shit.

depending on how this next month goes for my friends, holy s h i t.

i. i might do this. legitimately.

i. dont think i can yet. i need proof of address to get my license im pretty sure? but hey, thatll be my 21st this year, so. once i have that i wont need a new address for a While. i dont know if ill want one, really.

i could always just ask a friend or family member if i could use theirs for mail that cant go to a PO box.

anyway. yeah. wow.

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