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#especially if it’s one that’s just happening around me I that no one is letting me get words in anyway
tayytayy12 · 3 days
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Secrets | MV1 x Reader
Summary - Reader and Max have been in a secret relationship since the beginning of readers rookie season with McLaren, but all the pairs efforts to keep their relationship private almost go out the window when readers involved in a bad crash
Warnings - Mentions of car crash, injuries, swearing
Type - Written / small Smau at the end
Requested - No - Yes
Not been proofread
You didn’t remember exactly how your relationship with Max came around, you just kind of remembered it beginning and loving every second of it. You was halfway through your rookie season with McLaren, finally scoring some points and even a couple of podiums when Max made the first move and asked you out on a date, you was nervous obviously, but you said yes of course, and it was one of the best decisions you’d ever made.
The decision to keep the relationship a secret was a mutual one between the two of you, you because it was hard enough being a woman in a sport like Formula one without people saying you was only getting where you was because of your relationship with the reigning champion, and Max’s reasons were because he wanted you to make you happy and the PR would be a nightmare, every media outlet would be claiming he was the reason for your improvement over the summer brake, they’d even give him credit for your win in the Qatar sprint, and you wouldn’t let that happen.
It was now the weekend of the Las Vegas Grand Prix, and you were incredibly excited, you’d been on a high the last few weekends, and nothing could bring you down, especially because of Max’s dominance on the track, you knew most if not all of the other drivers were sick and tired of it, but you enjoyed to see how happy he got when he won, after every win when you would sneak into his hotel room (his were always bigger) and he’d have a huge grin in his face, he was achieving his dream, and it made you happy too.
“You’re going to do amazing, Schat, I can feel it.” Max whispered into your shoulder as the two of you were hiding in a corner of the paddock where no prying cameras or eyes could see you, the pair of you getting in a moment alone together before the race, you laughed into his chest as you tighten the hug the pair of you were wrapped in, “A p19 qualifying result isn’t a position for me to do amazing in, love.”
Max shrugged as he smoothed your hair down, “I think you’re capable of anything out on the track. You’ve got more talent than practically all of these guys combined,” he paused for a moment before grinning and saying, “well apart from me, of course.”
“You’re a wanker.” You laughed as you leaned up and kissed him gently, him returning it instantly without a second of hesitation, “I love you Schat, I’ll see you after the race, do great for me.” He whispered.
You smiled, “I love you more, win for me, yeah?”
“I’ll do anything for you.” He whispered before placing one last kiss on the crown of your head and leaving to go and finish prepping for the race.
——————
It all happened in a blur, it didn’t even register in your mind that you had crashed until you started fading in and out of consciousness from how hard you had hit your head from the impact of the crash, all you remember was making you way up to p16 and a car coming too close behind you, and then you was here, your head feeling light and fuzzy as you heard your teams voices practically screaming at you from over the radio, urging you to respond so they could know you was okay. The crash looked horrible and brutal, they didn’t know if you was okay, but by the looks of the car, it didn’t seem like you would be.
You tried to reach for the radio button, but you couldn’t respond, you couldn’t move, you couldn’t talk, all you could do was sit there as black surrounded your vision and you slowly faded into a world of the unconscious.
——————
“Red flag Max, box box.” Max sighed when he hewed those words over his radio, he already had a clear lead on the race, working his way up from his qualifying position of third back up to first place where he belonged.
“What happened?” He asked as he slowed down the car and drove into the pit lane and into his garage, as he heard a voice sound form over his radio again, “A pretty bad crash, not sure who it is yet.”
“The team?” He asked, making sure it wasn’t some like Daniel or Charles, or most importantly, you.
“McLaren, unsure if it’s Norris or Y/l/n.” His blood ran cold when he heard that, it couldn’t be you, you did t crash, you was stop good to crash, he knew it was wrong but he was silently praying over and over in his head that it was Lando in that car and he exited his own, but that hope came crashing down when he glanced down and saw Lando pacing up and down his garage, hands running through his hair, tugging at the short curly stands as he waited for word if you was okay.
Throughout your time at McLaren, you and Lando had become friends, incredibly close friends, he was the only person you had trusted enough to tell about yours and Max’s relationship, and he hadn’t told a soul, and in this moment he looked petrified.
Max’s eyes quickly darted over to the large screen, trying to see if you were okay, but when he saw how mangled and contorted your car was, he grew ten times more panicked instantly, you needed to be okay, he needed you to be okay.
They called the race to an early end, no one knowing if you was okay or if your injury’s were as severe as they looked, and Max took that as his opportunity to go tell Christian how he needed to see you, and when the older man heard Maxs erratic tone and his glassy eyes he dismissed him without a moment of hesitation, promising to cover for him if he had to attend any interviews or anything.
That’s how he got here, in a white hospital room, your hand wrapped up in his and he pressed constant tiny kisses against the knuckles of you as you lay unconscious, Lando on your other side, a stray tear in his cheek as he remembered how the doctor said that you hit your head hard and you had some internal bleeding in your stomach, the man looked unbearably sorrowful as he said that if you didn’t wake up within the next day or two, you might not at all.
“Max,” Lando whispered, shattering the silence that the room was coated in, Max just hummed in acknowledgment his stare not wavering from your body as Lando continued, “she um, she got you this. For when you won,” he said handing Max a small box that looked like it had some kind of jewellery in it, “she’d want you to have it.
Max slowly disconnected your hand from his as his shaky hands opened the lid of the box, and his breath stopped in his throat when he saw a silver necklace with a ring on the end, but what really got him was the inscription inside the ring, in small words it read, ‘my champion’, his eyes instantly became glassy and Lando cleared his throat and stood, “I’ll give you a minute with her.” Before leaving the room as max fastened the chain around his neck as he re-connected your hands.
“Please wake up, Schat,” he said his voice cracking and he whispered against your knuckles, “I can’t do this without you. I don’t want to do anything without you by my side. I want you with me every step of the way, when I win, when you win, I don’t want to hide anymore. I want to show people how much you mean to me, I love you so so much. So please, for me, wake up, don’t leave me.” He said as tears now flew down his face without even attempting to stop or slow them as he prayed that you’d open your eyes.
——————
Everything was so bright and loud around you when you woke up, your eyes adjusting to the white light as you come around to notice the extreme pounding in your head and the fact that you was in a hospital room and everything hurt.
Your eyes drifted down to the weight you felt around your waist where you saw Max sleeping, tear tracks on his face and the chain you’d bought for him around his neck, yous smiled, Lando must’ve given it to him.
Your finger slowly traced over his cheek, his jumping awake instantly at the touch and his eyes growing ten times wider at the sight of you awake, he yelled for a doctor as he stood a pressed tens of gentle kissed to the top of your head, “My god, Schat, never do that to me again, you hear me? I don’t want to know what anything would be like without you in my life. Don’t ever try and leave me again.”
You gently reached and pulled his head down so his forehead rested against your own, “I wouldn’t dream of it, My Champion.”
“You’re okay.” He said, his voice unbelieving as he placed his hands on your cheeks, you placed yours over his as you’re whispered back, “I’m okay, pretty boy. I’m okay.”
——————
Yourusername
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Liked by - Yourusername, LandoNorris and 2,972,197 others
Tagged | @/MaxVerstappen
Yourusername - IM ALIVE !!!! In a shit ton of pain but I’m going to be okay after a lonnngggg recovery, I’ll be out for Abu Dhabi but I’ll be right back in Bahrain 😙 oh yeah and here’s my bf Max, do you know him?
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User1 - EXCUSE ME?
User2 - WHAT WHEN AND HOW
User3 - HOW ARE YOU SO CASUAL ABOUT IT?!?!?
User4 - okay but the third picture? The bear hug? Y/n can I have him?
Yourusername - No sorry bby, I kinda like this one
LandoNorris - FINALLY. BEING THE ONLY ONE WHO KNEW WAS EXHAUSTING.
Yourusername - You’re a solider, Lan
User5 - Lando knowing is so them core.
MaxVerstappen - I love you so much, schat
Yourusername - I love you so so so so so much more my champion
User6 - BRB, raking a nap on the highway 💕💕
——————
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sunkissed-zegras · 3 days
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I’m just saying…. headcannons for paige with a bestfriend to partner who’s an introvert.
And I mean those introverts who seem quiet but the moment they get comfortable around you it’s over, but like only they get to see that side.
Paige seems like an extrovert that adopts introverts, like just imagine her having to drag her partner out of their room all the time cuz they’re a damn hermit.
-🐹
─ warnings | mention of drinking, teasing, fluff, nothin' else?
─ taglist | @xocherishxo @iienstein @yazmunson @euphternal and here's a link to my taglist if anyone would like to join!!
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honestly, you are so right in that assumption
she definitely gets closer with more introverted people, bc opposites DO really attract
when you guys first met it was your freshman year at uconn, at first you'd probably think she's WAY too much ─ maybe even cocky LOL (but who can blame her she's the best)
but when you spend more one on one time with her, you realize she's really funny and sweet
because you're so quiet, paige would be naturally drawn to you cus she gets to know you
so she just pesters you until you eventually give in and hang out with her
from that point on, the one is never seen without the other
you guys would always be together
but like... usually, you're just WITH paige so people don't really acknowledge you cus you're so quiet
but then paige would like force you to socialize
"this is y/n, i promise she's fun you just gotta put a little liquor in her-" "PAIGE."
she would push you toward her close friends the most, def like ice, azzi, nika and kk
ESPECIALLY kk!
and then you eventually would get really close with them, you all have your cute little friend group
you and ice would make fun of paige and kk together, you and azzi are kinda similar so you find yourself hanging out with her alone a lot more, and nika would force you out your shell a lot too
after a couple months of being friends, paige would definitely find herself catching feels
like i've said in my other headcanons, she just thinks you're such a big source of comfort for her and it slowly just becomes full-on adoration cus
she adores you
and you compliment her personality so well she is just like "i NEED to have her right now"
she ends up confessing one night after a really terrible game and then y'all kiss ...
and the rest is history 🤗🤗🤗
jk here's some relationship headcanons
again, you are so right nonnie
like i mentioned, one is never seen without the other
so you're always tied at the hip, especially at parties
at first she has to force you
like FULL force
she calls backup ofc ice and kk come and then its 3 vs 1
they end up winning
and this happens time and time again, you just get so worn down you'd rather just endure the damn party then listen to all three of them scream at you
which was the goal 🥰
and you're definitely the sober one 95% of the time so you will be taking care of a very drunk paige
(maybe some separate headcanons for her if yall want)
and sometimes even ice/kk but it's mostly just your girlfriend
anyway, yeah you take her home, take of her and then get her into bed
and when you try to leave she will be so dramatic, she forces you to stay with her
you don't mind cus you love cuddly paige
but the 5% when you're the one who's blackout drunk, paige is gonna take such good care of you
because you're so introverted when you're sober, you're probably gonna be such a rowdy drunk
yes im her shes me
so paige makes sure you don't get into trouble and gets you home safe and sound
but if you do something stupid, she will never ever let you live it down
"remember that time you jumped into the pool and-" "SHUT THE FUCK UP"
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↳ thank you for reading all the way through, as always ♡
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fyorina · 3 days
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ᡣ𐭩 I, CARRION
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FEATURING: beast dazai osamu
SUMMARY: the day of the event has arrived and dazai is second guessing everything, but it's too late for him to back out now.{wordcount: 12k; fem!reader; romance & tragedy}
AUTHOR'S NOTES: PART FOUR wow guys we're really getting into the meat of the fic now. HAHAH this is the chapter i had to split into two parts, initially it was going to be one big one but then it would've been a whopping 23k words and that's a bit much even for me. i didn't want to cross the 20k realm HAHAHH. anyway, this chapter really was a pleasure to write, the second scene was my favorite but the ending was SOOOO close to usurping it
GENERAL WARNINGS: again, i'll just leave this warning on every chapter - dazai struggles a lot with disassociation/derealization & losing himself in the pages of the book. as always please let me know if i forgot any warnings
SEE: UNREAL UNEARTH SERIES MASTERLIST READ: BADLANDS SIDE A
“Gin-chan, I’m so nervous.” 
You pace around Dazai’s penthouse anxiously, twisting your fingers in front of your body. The event is taking place tomorrow night. You still don’t have an outfit for it—Dazai told you not to worry about it, you’re still worrying about it because what does that even mean? You don’t know what to expect from the event, and Gin is evasive when you ask her about what will happen, just keeps telling you that it’ll be fine as long as you stay with Dazai.
“There’s no reason to be nervous,” Gin says, as she always does, still tapping away at her laptop. Glasses hang off the bridge of her nose and there are dark circles beneath her eyes. You feel a bit ashamed about constantly going on about your nerves when you know damn well she, Dazai and all of the other executives of his company have been working nonstop the past few days trying to finish preparations. “Dazai-san will be with you the whole time, and if he has to talk business, someone will sit with you until he can get back so you’re not feeling awkward.”
Somehow, you think that might be even more awkward because you doubt a random person is going to want to babysit you while Dazai is busy, but you don’t voice your thoughts, instead just withering as you circle the large room for the sixth time in the past five minutes. 
You’ve hardly seen Dazai all week. You don’t really mind, you know he’s swamped with work and you’ve been keeping yourself busy going out cafe hopping and shopping. Gin comes with you when she can, but it’s usually Nakajima Atsushi or Tachihara Michizo that joins you—Gin had introduced you to the two security guards a week ago when she’d been too busy to come with you to a cafe downtown. You don’t mind the company but you can’t help but wonder why Dazai is so insistent that someone comes with you.
Well. You can’t help but wonder about a lot of things, really. You’re pretty certain that Dazai is still hiding something major from you. You don’t know a lot about business, and you especially don’t know anything about his business, but something isn’t right. You’re not stupid and everyone is not as slick as they think themselves to be, you see how tense and anxious people get when you mention him to them, more so than the average worker would be at the mere mention of their boss, and everyone in the entire damn building is armed, even though they clearly try to hide it whenever you’re in the area. 
You and your friends have joked about the uber wealthy before, and how no one above a certain tax bracket obtains their wealth without some sort of blood money; you’re about 99% sure that’s what’s taking place here too, and it would certainly explain all of the secrecy. More so than trade secrets at least, you feel a bit dumb for that to have even been an explanation in your mind. You just don’t know the specifics. You don’t know if you want to know the specifics, you think you’d prefer to remain ignorant because 1) you definitely don’t want to have any sort of culpability, not when you’re on path to graduate school and hopefully a very prestigious job with the government, and 2) … you don’t want to face the reality of what that would mean. 
You like Dazai. More than like him. You’ve been slowly coming to terms with the fact that you really, truly care for him, and if you end up learning the… specifics of his job, then you’re going to be forced into making a decision you don’t want to make: preserving your future and morals or risking them for him. And you’re not going to sit around and claim to be some upstanding, virtuous person. You’re not. But you are ambitious, and you’ve had your mind set on your future since you learned how to pick up a pen and write. You’ve worked your entire life to get where you are now, slaved your way through a prestigious undergraduate school in Japan and spent months preparing for the entrance exams for graduate school, only to what? Throw it all away for some man?
God, you almost feel sick. Distantly, you wonder how awful of a person you must be for the threat to your future success to be the main reason why you’re questioning yourself, and not the fact that it’s very likely that Dazai and his conglomerate have some sort of business with Japan’s underground, maybe even direct dealings with the mafia itself. 
You pause from where you’re pacing around the room, eyes widening a bit as another realization hits you. You had thought it was odd that Dazai and Gin and all of the executives of the conglomerate have been so stressed and anxious over an event that they’re not even hosting, but what if… Your throat spasms a bit as you swallow, wondering if Dazai is about to bring you not to an event hosted by their rival, but to an event hosted by the mafia. You don’t think he would put you in danger like that, you don’t want to think he would put you in danger like that and you wonder if you’re just sending yourself down a spiral of unnecessary paranoia. 
But it doesn’t make sense. Dazai is enamored by you, and you don’t think you’re being conceited by saying that because he has made it abundantly clear. There’s no way he would ever put you in danger like that. Not unless… you feel a bit green remembering his reaction to you saying that you’d go out on your own and stay with your friend the weekend of the event. You could feel the anxiety radiating off of him for a split second before he asked you to come with him. You also remember how he always makes sure someone is with you when you go out, and god, you swear you’re not a conspiracy theorist but nothing is making sense when you look at it through your rose-tinted lenses but looking at it through these lenses. The lenses of a man who is obviously smitten with you, and who might have dealings with the mafia—of course he wouldn’t want you to go out on your own because he’d be scared that you might be targeted as a means to get to him.
Oh, you feel dizzy. What have you gotten yourself into?
“Are you okay?” Gin is looking up at you, brows furrowed in concern. “You look a little sick.”
“I’m fine,” you say, but the words sound pathetic even to your own ears and you know Gin doesn’t believe you from the way she tilts her head to the side to study you.
Luckily, you’re saved by the bell. Literally. 
Your head snaps to the side as the elevator dings, and ordinarily, you would be ecstatic because who else would be coming up to the penthouse besides Dazai and while you’ve certainly missed him over the past week with how busy he’s been, you’re not sure if you’re ready to see him right now with the way your thoughts have just spiraled, because you think you might blurt something out that you can’t take back.
But, for better or for worse, it is not Dazai that enters the penthouse.
“Good morning, ladies,” a familiar voice croons as the elevator doors slide open. Your eyes light up as you whip around, eyes falling upon a face you haven’t seen in almost two weeks. “I come bearing gifts.”
“Albatross!” you say, excited, a smile splitting your face, because yes, even knowing about the possible affiliation with the mafia, you’re still excited to see the blonde—he’s never been anything but sweet to you, and he’s really the only one besides Gin and Chuuya who doesn’t treat you weirdly because of your relationship with Dazai. 
“D’aw, look at it, Lippmann, told you the doll would still remember me,” Albatross grins, dark glasses hanging on the bridge of his nose as he tosses you a wink and then looks back toward the elevator.
Your gaze follows his, and your eyes fall upon a vaguely familiar person stepping out of the elevator and into the penthouse, carrying a few boxes. Pale hair cut into a bob, a pretty, androgynous face, dressed to the nines in a light purple waistcoat and matching pants—where have you seen him before? Wait-
“You’re-!” you begin, eyes wide and lips parting in shock.
“Walter Lippmann,” the man greets you with a kind smile and soft eyes, you feel a bit flustered, you can hardly meet his gaze. “Everybody just calls me Lippmann though.”
You try to speak, but you’re a bit starstruck—the last thing you’d expected was for a movie star to step into the penthouse. You’re looking between Albatross and Gin and then hesitantly back at Lippmann as you try to figure out what’s going on. 
Albatross cackles. “Looks like she’s gotta crush, Lippmann. Better not let the boss find out, he’ll get jealous.”
“Albatross,” you complain, hands flying to cover your hot face. “Not true, I’m just surprised. Am I allowed to be surprised?”
“Yeah, sure, doll, that’s it,” Albatross says, clearly not believing you at all as he throws himself onto the couch next to Gin, looking up at you. “The boss asked us to pick up a dress for you. Go try it on, I’m going to raid his liquor cabinet while you do—if he asks, you better take the blame.”
You see Gin roll her eyes. “You will not raid his liquor cabinet, Albatross,” she says firmly, but the man only winks at her.
You turn your attention back to Lippmann, who’s carrying the dress in a garment bag, a shoe box tucked under his other arm. He gives you a small smile and then motions for you to follow him; you’re still starstruck as you follow him into Dazai’s bedroom, pointedly ignoring the way Albatross snickers. 
You watch as Lippmann hangs the garment bag up on the closet, placing the shoebox down on the bed. He turns toward you after and says, “Try it on and make sure it fits properly. And make sure you like it.”
You nod, lips parting to speak but no words leave your lips. You look up at the garment bag, down to the shoes, and back to Lippmann and then you ask, “How do you… how do you know Dazai?” 
Lippmann gives you another gentle smile, tucking a strand of hair behind his ear. You notice, a bit curiously, that he seems to take a moment before he speaks, as if choosing his words carefully. 
“I knew Dazai’s father,” he says after a few seconds. “I work with the Mori Corporation sometimes regarding press and political matters. Like a spokesperson when Dazai is unable to.”
Hm, you think to yourself before nodding, a movie star as a spokesperson for a corporation, that’s a bit odd, isn’t it?
Your brows furrow slightly as you try to fit the new knowledge in with all of the rest you’ve put together over the past few weeks but it’s just another jagged puzzle piece that’s not fitting in anywhere.
“I’m a huge fan of your movies,” you finally tell him, rubbing the back of your neck as you toss him a sheepish smile. “Like, no joke, almost cried when you had your discussion panel for The Good Society three months ago because it was two days before my entrance exam to grad school so I couldn’t go.”
Lippman laughs, pale cheeks flushing as he looks down at the ground before back up at you. “Honestly, you didn’t miss out. The whole panel was a mess, and the AC broke twenty minutes before, so it was ridiculously hot.”
You don’t really know what to say to that, cursing the fact that you are 1) still half dazed on top of 2) already being naturally awkward, but Walter Lippmann is Walter Lippmann, so of course he knows just what to say and do.
He nods to the dress that he hung up on the closet. “Try it on and then give us a show,” he says, winking at you before he makes his way out of Dazai’s bedroom back into the other room with Albatross and Gin.
You sigh when you’re alone again, tilting your head up to look at the ceiling for a moment, wondering what your life has become before you make your way over to the dress. You unzip the garment bag, curious to see what Dazai had picked for you, and your eyes shoot open when you see the red gown within the bag. Smooth and silky, off-the-shoulder, it’s probably the most expensive thing you’ve ever laid your eyes upon; you feel like you shouldn’t even touch it, much less put it on. 
But Lippmann and Albatross and Gin are out there waiting, you can hear them talking through the door, so you force yourself to gingerly pull it off of the hanger, careful to not be too rough with the material. It doesn’t take you too long to get your clothes off and the dress on, but when you do, you can hardly bring yourself to move away from the mirror. 
You look beautiful. You do. The dress is a perfect fit, it compliments your skin, it compliments your hair. You look beautiful, but you feel like a fraud, like a clown in a ball gown, hoping that the beauty of the dress would draw attention from the fact that it’s not meant for someone like you. 
You don’t know how long you stand there, staring at your reflection. Too long, evidently, because you hear a sharp knock at the door and Lippman’s concerned voice asking if you’ve gotten the dress on.
“Yeah,” you say quietly. “I’m dressed.”
You hear the door to Dazai’s bedroom creak open but you don’t turn to look.
“I think this costs more than my student loans,” you breathe out, staring at yourself in the mirror. You smooth your hands over the silky material, eyes catching the way it clings to you perfectly. “God, where the hell did he get something like this? It’s like it was made for me.”
“Probably was,” Lippmann says from where he’s leaning against the doorframe, lips quirked up into a half smile as he tosses you another wink. “Perks of dating one of the richest men in Japan.”
You let out a noise caught between a whimper and a laugh, suddenly feeling very, very out of place.
Lippmann clearly catches your sudden change in attitude and his brows furrow. “Do you not like it?” he asks curiously. “There’s plenty of time for him to send for something else.”
“No, no,” you hurry to say, voice catching. Although you’re unsure how twenty-hour hours constitutes ‘plenty of time’, but you digress. “It’s perfect. It is.”
“What’s the issue then?”
“I just…” you trail off, eyes lingering in the mirror. “I feel silly, I guess. How obvious is it that I’ve never worn anything like this before?” 
“Silly?” Lippmann asks, amused, peeling off the doorframe to make his way over to you. You swallow thickly as he straightens your posture and then uses two fingers to make you raise your chin. “You look stunning. Like a woman who belongs on the arm of the most influential man in Japan… Like a woman who doesn’t need to be on the arm of any man.”
Your face feels a bit hot as you let out a puff of laughter. “Now you’re exaggerating.”
“I certainly am not,” Lippmann says firmly, taking a step back. “You’re only getting in your head. From what Chuuya has told me about you, you’re more than suited to outwit and outclass anyone in attendance at that event.”
Your face feels hotter now, smiling as you roll your eyes. “Flatterer,” you say, but you feel a bit better, chest lighter as your gaze turns back to look at the mirror. “... Do you-”
A sharp whistle from the door draws your attention from Lippmann; there’s a lecherous smile on Albatross’s face as he leans against the frame and looks at you, glasses hanging off the bridge of his nose. “Damn, if you weren’t the boss’s girl…”
Gin slaps him hard on the back of his head, glaring at him before turning a small smile to you. “You look beautiful,” she says softly. “He’ll be speechless when he sees you tomorrow.”
Your throat feels tight as your lashes flutter, a smile on your lips as you look down at the ground. Even though the concerns of your realizations from before still weigh heavily in the back of your mind, you can’t help but feel a bit giddy at the thought of seeing Dazai tomorrow.
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The giddiness is long gone.
You still haven’t gotten dressed.
You’re sitting at the edge of Dazai’s bed in your bra and panties, staring at the wall with your knees pulled to your chest. Your dress is hanging on the closet on the far side of the room, heels sitting on the floor beneath it. You’ve done your makeup and you put your earrings on already—pretty, dangly diamonds that are the most expensive thing you own, the last thing your brother gifted you before he cut you off entirely. You need to be getting dressed, Dazai will be up here any second to pick you up to leave for the event, but you just can’t bring yourself to put the dress on, anxiety eating away at you.
It’s not even because of the realization you’d come to yesterday, it’s because you think you’re about to make a fool out of yourself. Even if you’re wrong about the theory that you might be heading into an event hosted by the mafia and their associates, you’re still heading into an event that’s going to be attended by people who are much wealthier than you, and you already feel out of place and you’re not even there. 
The dress is beautiful, but you think you’ll look like a clown in it, everyone will know that you’re not from the same sector of life as them with a single glance. Lippmann’s words from yesterday are in one ear out the other now that you’re closer to the actual time of the event.
You’re so lost in your thoughts that you don’t even hear the bing of the elevator arriving at the penthouse, and you don’t notice Dazai until he pushes open the cracked door to step into the bedroom. And you feel like you should be embarrassed sitting half naked on his bed, rather than being dressed and waiting for him, but you can’t muster it, eyes dragging up from the wall to land on his concerned expression. 
And he’s a sight, you think. He’s so handsome. Absently, you think he might be more handsome than the last time you saw him but you think that’s a bit ridiculous because he hasn’t changed at all. He’s wearing the same long black coat and burgundy scarf, but the sleek, dark suit he wears beneath it is different, more expensive than all of the others that he’s donned the past few months you’ve known him. 
His lips are turned downward as he approaches you, placing a blue box down on his dresser, dark eye soft with concern, and you also can’t help but notice that he still wears the bandages around the upper left side of his face, covering his eye. You want to know what’s beneath them desperately, but you can’t bring yourself to ask, hoping that he’ll show you on his own terms.
He stands in front of you, and you rest your chin on your knees as you stare forward, staring at his abdomen instead of looking up at his face. But he doesn’t let your gaze linger there, bringing his right hand to cup your cheek so he can gently lift your face upward, forcing you to meet his eyes. You can feel the rough edges of his bandages scraping against your skin, and you instinctively lean into his touch. You try to remind yourself of all of the realizations you’d come to yesterday, tell yourself to not be as at ease with him, at least have some semblance of your guard up, but you fail.
“What’s wrong?” he asks you softly, letting you lean into his touch as he brings his other hand up to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear. “Are you okay?”
And you feel selfish, you realize, as you try to figure out what to tell him. You can’t even fathom the amount of money he spent on your dress and the shoes, and here you are being a baby because you’re self conscious. You don’t even want to reply to him, so you try to turn your face away but he doesn’t let you.
“Tell me,” he says quietly. “I’ll fix it, whatever it is.”
“It’s silly,” you finally breathe out, averting your gaze to the ground as you let your eyes flutter shut, turning your face in his hand to kiss his palm before leaning back into it. “I’m being a baby, I’m sorry.”
“It’s not silly if it has you upset,” Dazai tells you, and he kneels down in front of you to catch your gaze again and briefly, you think it’s absurd that you have such a powerful man at your whims like this, kneeling before you, willing to do anything to make sure that you’re content and happy. It makes your throat swell a bit, those inferior feelings rising back to your chest with a vengeance, because what the hell did you do to deserve this? There’s nothing special about you. “Tell me what’s wrong, let me help.”
“I just don’t understand.” 
Oh my god, your voice cracks, you can feel your eyes go a bit misty, and instantly, Dazai’s concerned gaze is narrowing, as if trying to calculate what exactly is the source of your distress so he can remove it, and it only makes you want to cry more because what did you do to deserve all of this? 
If you’re right about all of the assumptions you made the other day, and Dazai is bringing you to this event even though by all means he should not because there’s likely going to be a lot of shady business occurring that could incriminate him and all of the other people at this event, then why? Why would he risk that just for a girl he met a few months ago? You can’t fathom it.
God, you know better than anyone the effects imposter syndrome can have on a person in school, but the last thing you expected was to be dealing with it in love too.
Love, the word makes your stomach churn because you do love him, you realize, as he stares up at you desperately trying to figure out what’s wrong so he can fix it. And how scary is that, considering only twenty-four hours ago you came to the realization that he’s very likely involved in the underground, in some way or another, and you had to come to terms with the fact that you’d have to choose between your future and a man. But he’s not just a man, he’s a man that you love in spite of everything you’ve put together.
A tear spills over your cheek and Dazai’s gaze becomes alarmed as he instantly wipes it away with his thumb before caressing your cheek gently. 
“What don’t you understand?” he presses quietly. “Talk to me.”
Where do you fucking start?
You want to cry even more but you force yourself not to, you can’t afford to let your makeup get anymore messed up than it already is. Instead you sniffle a bit and try to blink away the tears. 
“This,” you finally say, and your voice cracks again, you take a wet breath. Dazai’s lips part a bit, as if he wants to speak but he’s not sure what to say, brows furrowing. “There’s nothing special about me, Dazai, and I don’t understand why you’ve gone to the lengths that you have for me. Meeting me at that club every Friday as if you’re not always swamped with work, indulging me whenever I want to do things. You gave me a place to stay after only knowing me for a few weeks, gave up your own room, your own bed, so I could be comfortable while you slept at your desk. You’ve made sure people are always with me so I never get bored or lonely. You’ve given me literally everything I could possibly ask for and I’ve just been freeloading off of you for two and a half weeks now. Now, I’m going to go with you to this event and end up embarrassing you because I’m going to stick out like a sore thumb compared to everyone else there. They’ll know I don’t belong there and I just-”
You cut yourself off, and you want to avert your gaze from Dazai’s but you can’t bring yourself to. Instead, you watch as something akin to amusement flashes through his eye. He takes one of your hands into his and brings it up to his lips, eye sliding shut for a moment as he kisses your knuckles. You let out a shaky puff of air as his lips linger for a moment before he looks up at you again through his lashes.
“Let me help you get dressed,” he murmurs, and you look down at the ground now as you nod, letting him help you to your feet and lead you over to where the dress is hanging up on the closet door.
He pulls it off the hanger and guides you into it, pulling it up and adjusting it so that it covers you properly. He steps behind you, and you realize that he also has you standing in front of the floor length mirror set up on his closet door. You sniffle a bit again as you look at yourself in the mirror. 
Your makeup looks a bit smudged beneath your eye from the tears gathering at your lash line, but somehow, you still look beautiful. You think it’s only because of the dress, the way it clings to your body so nicely and brightens all of your features. You take in another shuddered gulp of air when you feel Dazai begin to zip up the back of your dress slowly, each brush of his fingers against your skin lights your nerves on fire, and once he finally has it zipped to the top, he kisses the nape of your neck, hands falling to your hips to caress them gently. Your eyes flutter shut as you lean back against him, his comforting hold settling your turbulent emotions.
“I met you at the club every Friday because you were the only relief I had from reality,” he finally says, resting his forehead on your shoulder as he holds you. “I indulged your requests because I was indulging in you myself. Every moment I spent with you, I allowed myself to be Dazai Osamu, the person, and not the… Not what I’ve had to become to keep this organization running.”
Your breath catches, lips parting at his words but no sound escapes them. He kisses the nape of your neck one last time before he moves to stand in front of you, kneeling down again as he grabs one of your heels and undos the buckle. You watch with bated breath as he lifts your left foot from the ground to kiss your ankle before sliding the heel on, deft fingers fasting the clasp. 
“I gave you a place to stay because I was selfish and I wanted you around more,” he sighs, resting his forehead against your knee now as he lingers there for a moment before moving on to repeat the process with your other foot, kissing your ankle and slipping the heel on. He continues, “Likewise, I have kept you surrounded by people because I have been desperately afraid that you’re going to get bored and want to leave because work leaves me little time to be around. Unfortunately, I’m not the generous person you’re making me out to be, I’m horribly self-serving and greedy, especially when it comes to you.”
He looks up at you now from where he’s kneeling in front of you, gaze searching your face. You want to reach out and cup his cheek, so you do, and immediately, he’s turning his face to kiss your palm just as you’d done to him before letting his eye slide shut as he leans into your touch, as if basking in it.
“I would give you anything you want,” he admits softly, keeping his gaze shut as he holds your palm against his face. “Anything. And if it was something outside of my reach, I would make it in my reach. There’s nothing I wouldn’t do for you, no lengths I wouldn’t go to and no lines I wouldn’t cross.”
You think your lungs might be burning, you don’t think you can breathe as you stare down at him, heart thudding in your swelling chest, tears building in your eyes again but this time not out of insecurity. Dazai finally rises to his feet after placing one last kiss upon your knuckles, and he doesn’t say anything as he makes his way over to the dresser where he’d placed the blue box. 
You don’t move, watching as he opens it and pulls something out before making his way back over to you, standing behind you. He looks at you through the mirror as he lifts his hands to place a glittering diamond necklace upon your collarbone. You can’t breathe again, you realize, it’s cool against your skin and you think it might be the most expensive thing you’ve ever laid your eyes upon, dozens upon dozens of white diamonds shimmering in the mirror in front of you. Your skin feels like it’s on fire as his fingers brush the nape of your neck as he clasps it onto you. 
“You are beautiful,” he says, voice so raw that you almost shiver at the intensity of it. His fingers brush your hips as if he’s afraid to touch you. “You are beautiful, and intelligent, and everything I have ever wanted. You deserve so much more than me, more than you’ll ever be able to understand, and I’m sorry that I’m not a good enough man to do what’s right and let you go. The last thing you should ever be doubting is this.”
His eye slides shut again as he lets out a soft puff of air, the warmth fans across the back of your neck and you think you could spend forever in this moment with him, wishing that you could freeze time. 
“You said that you thought it was fate that brought us together,” he finally finishes, voice quiet as he references what you told him the first time you met. “Don’t ever doubt your place with me. Wherever I am, you belong, whether it’s a club, or an apartment, or an event.”
“I thought you hate the idea of fate,” you say, voice a bit choked as you try to force the tears back again.
“I do,” he affirms, “but if fate brought us together, then far be it from me to deny the one thing in this world that has ever made me happy.”
You love him.
You feel sick to your stomach—be it from butterflies or the implications of the realization. The words threaten to burst from your lips but you swallow them, instead, another tear trails down your face and he sees it through the mirror, lifting his hand to wipe it away before leaning a bit over your shoulder to press his lips to your jaw.
“I’m ruining my makeup,” you rasp, letting out another shaky breath.
He smiles against your skin.
“You’ll be beautiful still,” he murmurs before pulling back, admiring you for a moment before he asks: “Are you ready to go?”
You nod. “Yeah,” you say, a bit breathless. “I’m ready.”
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“Everyone is staring at us.”
You’re not wrong, exactly. As soon as the two of you had entered the room, all attention was sent your way, and though the music was loud enough to drown out most chatter (intentional, of course, so unsavory ears can’t overhear even more unsavory dealings), Dazai couldn’t help but notice the hush that spread through the room at the sight of you. The boss of the Port Mafia with a date on his arm was certainly a sight to behold to all of the rest of the occupants of the event hall,.
“Can you blame them? You look beautiful,” he says, voice laced with a teasing edge that is certainly not matched in his expression. Dazai knew people would be looking at you if he brought you here. Still, he wants to gouge their eyes out. 
His arm tightens around you as he tucks you into his side, cold gaze sweeping across the massive event hall. At least two hundred people are attending Nabokov’s event—an even mixture of pharmaceutical tycoons, technology barons, politicians and mafiosos. 
At first glance, he recognizes four different mafias in attendance. 
Mishima Yukio of the Sun and Steel stands by one of his associates, the president of Mitsubishi Chemical Group; the man’s dark eyes card over Dazai with lazy interest, before his head tilts to the side as he studies you.
Dazai thinks that the Sun and Steel might be the Port Mafia’s only allies in attendance, and even then, allies might be taking it too far. The extent of Dazai’s dealing with Mishima was a general agreement to not encroach the Sun and Steel’s monopoly over the narcotics industry—which Dazai never intended on doing anyway because the industry is far more trouble than it's worth—and an unspoken promise to protect Japan’s underground from foreign mafias. 
Dazai wonders if that unspoken promise still holds or if the Russians have cut a deal with him. 
Nabokov’s Pale Flame, obviously, is in attendance, along with the remnants of Leo Tolstoy’s Three Deaths. Tolstoy himself is sitting at the bar, a glass of whiskey in hand as he leans back on the stool, gaze focused on you. Nabokov is off to the left, making his way across the room to greet Dazai, a curious expression on his face. Dazai recognizes Cao Xueqin of the Red Chamber sitting near Kitazawa Michihiro of Fuji Electric, one of the Port Mafia’s closest associates; and Dazai thinks that might be a bit foreboding, both because of the presence of the Chinese and the company he’s keeping.
Dostoevsky’s House of the Dead is nowhere to be seen, but Dazai knows that they’re here. Somewhere. He just has to find him—and he will.
More eyes are on you than him, and although that was to be expected, Dazai can’t fight the doubt that suddenly swirls in his chest, wondering if he’d made the right decision. If you hadn’t been on people’s radar already, you definitely are now, and the thought makes him a bit sick to his stomach. He tries to console himself with the fact that this was the lesser of two evils—the mere chance of you being on the radar of any of the mafias in this room, no matter how slim it might be, was not something he could gamble with. There was no way he could let you go out alone and unprotected. People like them, people like him, would jump on the chance to take advantage of the weakness and he couldn’t let that happen. 
But is this really any better? 
He’s thrown you into a pit of snakes, and you’re ignorant to all of the threats around you. His gaze drifts back down to you, catching the way your brows are knit together slightly, the way your lips are pressed in a thin line. There’s an indecipherable look in your eyes as your gaze shifts over the room, and Dazai wonders if you know more than you’re letting on. That’s another scary thought, but he can at least find comfort in it for now because it’ll have you keeping your guard up around these people. He’ll just have to deal with the consequences later.
He dips his head down to your ear, speaking quietly before Nabokov finally reaches him: “Just follow my lead, you’ll be fine.”
The look you shoot at him is nothing short of withering, and Dazai can’t help the smile that curves at the corners of his lips as he lifts his head back up to subtly brush his lips against your temple. He catches sight of movement from the corner of his eye and any softness that might’ve been visible in his expression washes away instantly.
“Dazai,” Nabokov greets, beady eyes flickering between you and Dazai, partially curious about you and partially nervous about Dazai. Dazai tilts his head to the side, becoming increasingly more unamused the longer Nabokov’s gaze lingers on you. “I’m glad you came. I wanted to apologize for not being able to attend our planned meeting a few months ago.”
“So I heard.” Dazai’s voice is short and distant, more focused on the feeling of you tucked into his side than the conversation at hand. He has to force himself to keep his gaze steady on Nabokov, wanting to look down at you, but he contents himself with letting his hand slide down to your hip, rubbing absent circles against the silky material of your dress. 
Nabokov fumbles over Dazai’s clipped response, a bead of sweat gathering at the corner of his forehead. He wishes he could peer into your head and see what you’re thinking, about him, about this, about everything. He doesn’t know if he’ll be able to get through the night without you realizing who he is, what he is, and that thought scares him because he thinks that maybe he should have been the one to explain it to you, so he could at least try to paint himself in a better light. Although, he’s not sure what sort of light would make anything about him look better.
“Who is this?” Nabokov finally asks, turning his attention toward you. Dazai doesn’t like the way he looks at you, eyes raking over you like you’re a piece of meat.
“My partner.” To Dazai’s credit, his voice is much smoother than the turbulent emotions in his chest would suggest. “Where is your wife, Nabokov?” 
Nabokov doesn’t even respond to the question, laughing loudly. “Never thought I’d see the day you found yourself a lover, Dazai,” he chuckles and then holds his hand out to you. “Vladimir Nabokov.”
You shift a bit to take his hand, but Dazai is faster, lithe fingers wrapping around Nabokov’s wrist in an agonizingly tight grip. Nabokov winces, Dazai’s face is cold as he stares down at the man.
“Keep your hands to yourself,” he warns, keeping his voice low. 
Vladimir Nabokov. Invitation to a Beheading. An ability that grants its user to draw a target into an interdimensional space through physical touch—Dazai isn’t sure what the space entails because no one has ever left it alive.
Nabokov tries to laugh it off, weaker this time as he takes his hand back and shakes out his wrist. “My, Dazai, possessive, aren’t you?”
“Very,” Dazai agrees idly. “Be sure to remember that.”
Nabokov gives him another wavering smile, and Dazai can’t help but wonder how Dostoevsky could have possibly thought anyone would believe the man could head the tripartite alliance of the Pale Flame, Three Deaths, and the House of the Dead. Anyone with half of a brain would know that Dostoevsky is behind their union. Maybe that’s what he wanted, Dazai notes absently as he watches Nabokov’s gaze flicker to the upper left corner of the room. Dazai follows it to where a camera is positioned, encompassing most of the event hall. 
The smile on his lips is nearly as chilly as the air-conditioned room around him.
There you are. 
Dazai’s gaze cuts back to Kouyou, who’s standing a few feet behind you and Dazai with Chuuya, Ace and Piano Man. The woman inclines her head in recognition of his silent order as she fans her face lightly, taking a step away to make a call to Hirotsu, who should be stationed around the building with the rest of the Black Lizards by now, prepared to move in at the first sign of danger.
Nabokov looks as if he’s going to speak again, which inclines Dazai to believe that he’s seeking something out in particular for Dostoevsky, and from the way he keeps glancing at you, Dazai assumes it has to do with you. So as the man's lips waver, eyes darting as he tries to formulate another conversation opener, Dazai speaks before he can get the words out.
“If you don’t mind,” he says, voice cold and clipped as he all but dismisses Nabokov, who flushes a bit, nodding and apologizing before stepping away. 
Dazai realizes that he probably has not prepped you enough for this event, but in his defense, he’s been swamped with his own preparations and how is he supposed to prepare you when he can’t even fully explain all of the dangers? But now, it’s making him anxious, because at some point tonight he’s going to have to step away from you to meet with Nabokov in one of the backrooms, likely with Tolstoy, Cao, and Mishima. Dazai’s executives will have to be there with him, and Tachihara is supposed to slip from the shadows to join you while you wait for his return, but there’s likely going to be at least a good two to three minutes where you’ll be alone until Tachihara can get to you. That’s assuming he doesn’t get caught up on the way over.
He needs to talk to you, at least warn you about the ability users attending the event so you don’t accidentally stumble into a potentially lethal situation without him around.
If he goes to the bar, Tolstoy will take advantage to try to sweep you into a conversation, picking up right where Nabokov left off. If he goes off to the left side of the room, Cao will make his way over to interrupt. If he goes off to the right side of the room, Mishima is there. The only place… Dazai inhales as his gaze focuses on the massive dance floor of the event hall, dozens of couples are spinning around already, and it will be loud enough there for the music to drown out his conversation with you from unwelcome listeners. 
He turns his attention to you, holding his palm up and tucking one arm behind his back as he asks lightly, “May I have this dance?” 
Your eyes widen a bit in surprise, seemingly hyper aware of all of the hungry, curious glances of the other attendants directed your way, but he’s only focused on you, and the way your eyes glitter beneath the chandelier’s lights, and the way your dress clings to your body, and the way a soft smile tugs at your lips. He thinks that even if you hadn’t entered the event on his arm, all of the room’s attention would be on you still, because you’re beautiful, and captivating, and Dazai doesn’t think he’ll ever understand how he managed to pull you in one lifetime, much less all of them. 
You place your hand in his and Dazai guides you across the floor, intent on finding the perfect space. It’s hardly obvious the way that the other people on the dance floor would inch away as the two of you passed by, intent on staying out of Dazai’s way and letting him have whatever space he wants, but you pick up on it, he thinks, seeing the curious look in your eyes as your gaze sweeps around the people around you. He bites back a sigh, because he’s sure that you’re tallying everything up in your head trying to put it all together, and once you get that final puzzle piece, everything will be over.
His chest sinks at the thought of losing you, but he forces it away. He has to focus on the situation at hand because even a single slip up could be fatal—not only for him, but for you too. As soon as he reaches a suitable spot on the dance floor, he tugs you a bit closer to him, hands sliding down to your waist. Your own arms instantly come up to loop around his neck as you look up at him through your lashes and Dazai suddenly feels breathless, vision tunneling and heartbeat stuttering at the way you look at him.
God, how is he supposed to focus with you around? He can hardly concentrate on anything but you. He’s flying too close to the sun. Has been since the moment he met you. Drawing you into his life and keeping you there, now bringing you here, so many gambles, too many gambles… the heat is scorching, and it’s only a matter of time before his wings burn. If he was smart, he’d let you go so that you don’t burn with him, but his fingers only bite deeper into your waist at the thought.
The music is slow, and the two of you sway in tune to it. The other couples give a wide berth, some casting wary looks at Dazai, ones that he’s sure you’re catching. He doesn’t know where to start, or how to start; what does he tell you that doesn’t condemn him? Luckily, he doesn’t have to start the conversation because you do, for better or for worse.
“Was that man the rival that Gin mentioned?” you ask curiously, and Dazai can’t help but notice there’s a strange look in your eyes as you ask it, one that he can’t place.
He hesitates, but then says, “No. He wasn’t. I haven’t seen him yet.”
You hum lightly, fingers toying with the hair at the nape of his neck in a way that makes him shiver. But his eyes narrow when he realizes that you don’t look the slightest bit surprised by his answer. 
“You knew that already,” he accuses lightly, and he forces himself to swallow the lump that suddenly forms in his throat because if you figured that out on your own already, what else have you figured out? God, he knew this was risky, you’ve always been ridiculously perceptive—he just needs to get through tonight without you putting everything together, then he’ll be fine.
“I suspected it,” you finally affirm his accusation, gaze searching his face. “He was nervous talking to you. If he was your rival, I’d expect him to be a bit more… assured. And he kept looking up toward a camera, like he knew someone was watching that he’d have to answer to.”
Oh, you did pick up on a lot more than he expected. He doesn’t think that the smile he gives you quite meets his eyes, if the way your brows furrow have anything to say about it, but he distracts you by bringing his hand up from your waist to cup your cheek, thumb brushing over your bottom lip as he murmurs, “That’s my girl, always so smart.”
Your lashes flutter as you avert your gaze, a tell tale sign of you being flustered. His lips quirk up into a more genuine smile, hand dropping back down to your waist. He can do this, he tells himself, he just has to be careful, tell you enough to make sure your guard is up and you know to at least some extent that the people in this room aren’t to be trusted.
“There are a lot of ability users in here,” he finally warns, careful to keep his voice low even with the music covering his words. “Do your best to keep your distance from people. I’ll stay with you as much as I can, but I’m going to get pulled away sooner or later. Chuuya or Piano Man will stay with you when they can, and if they’re pulled away, Tachihara is going to come down to stay with you.”
“... That’s why you didn’t let him shake my hand,” you say, realization flashing through your eyes, another puzzle piece fitting behind your eyes and Dazai has to be careful because it’s only a matter of time before you’re given that final piece and everything comes together. “What’s his ability?” 
“... Nothing good,” he answers after a few moments of silence, but you’re not content with that, brows furrowing. He sighs. “No confirmation on it, we only know it’s lethal. Many are in here.”
Your eyes widen and then you look a bit skeptical. “And you think they would use it here? In public?” you ask slowly.
To Dazai’s horror, it is not skepticism tainting your tone, but rather, you’re fishing for information, trying to put more pieces together, and he doesn’t have much choice but to give you answers because he can’t risk you setting your guard down even for a second.
He chooses his words carefully. “... There is little they wouldn’t do to get ahead in our business.”
“Hm,” is all you say in response, something akin to understanding flashing through your eyes and Dazai dreads to know what his answer has just told you. He feels distinctly like he’s playing chess against an opponent he did not anticipate and he’s at a disadvantage because the opponent is you. He can feel your shoulders slump suddenly, an unfamiliar expression crossing over your face; you look tired, as if you’d aged twenty years in a matter of seconds. “What did you get me involved with, Dazai?” 
You say it so softly that Dazai barely hears it himself, and he knows. He knows that you’ve figured something out, he doesn’t know what and he doesn’t want to know what. He wants to evade it as long as possible, because the moment he has to have this conversation with you, he knows he’ll lose you. He can’t think about that now, it’ll throw him off and this is the last place he can allow himself to be thrown off.
Instead, his grip on your waist tightens again, gaze averting down toward the ground. 
“I’m sorry,” he murmurs. The words weigh heavy on his tongue, not just an apology for tonight but an apology for accepting your offer for a drink two months ago, knowing he wouldn’t be strong enough to let it be a single night of indulgence; an apology for seeking you out again afterward, knowing that he would be sentencing you to death.
He feels sick. 
What is he doing?
Why are you here?
What has he done?
“Dazai.”
You say his name but Dazai hardly hears you. God, he can feel it happening, where his fingers are pressed against your body, the skin suddenly goes cold and stiff, his surroundings are blurring, the people fading into the background. This isn’t the place. Nabokov. Tolstoy. Mishima. Cao. He can’t lose himself, not now, but his grip on reality is starting to waver, the pages pile around him. 
“Dazai.”
What has he done?
Everything he’s planned for, seven years of careful calculations and planning gone down the drain. How does he even fix this? Can he fix this? His mind races, but he’s not even sure he’s thinking coherent thoughts, trying to ground himself to the present because he needs to stay here, he can figure out how to fix it later, when you’re not in danger but-
His vision swims. Not now. He can see it—he can see you. Still on the ground. Sometimes there’s blood, so much that he can hardly recognize you (but he can, of course, he can always recognize you, even when your body is littered with more gaping wounds than not). Sometimes it looks like you’re sleeping, so much so that Dazai kneels next to you, begging you to wake up (he knows in his heart that it’s futile. he can’t stop himself from trying). His head spins, he loses track of where he is and then-
“Osamu.”
His breath catches, gaze zeroing in on you. You. Alive. Your brows are furrowed in concern, searching his face to try to draw him back to reality. He thinks his grip on your waist must be painful but he can’t bring himself to loosen it at all. He stares at you, still desperately trying to keep himself grounded because although you’ve brought him back mostly, the corners of the pages still linger in the edge of his vision, threatening to consume him again.
“You can’t leave me,” you tell him quietly. “You brought me here. I need you here with me. Don’t go off somewhere I can’t follow.”
Oh.
He lets out a breath, slow and maybe a bit more shaky than he would’ve liked, but he tries to focus on the situation at hand. He loosens his grip on your waist, rubbing a gentle circle over your hip in an apology.
His gaze drifts around the room, Nabokov is in deep conversation with Cao, hardly paying attention to anything going on, but Cao’s sharp, dark eyes are pointed over Nabokov’s shoulder, scanning the dance floor. He’s looking for someone—not Dazai, which is a bit worrying, and he becomes all the more attentive to everyone in the vicinity, trying to make sure none of the Red Chamber’s assassins made it through the security. If any organization would be able to pull it off, it would be them. 
Once he’s decided the coast is clear, he turns his gaze back to the bar. Tolstoy is looking at him—blue eyes sharp, blonde hair hanging in them, a curious expression on his face as he sips at his drink and watches as Dazai dances with you. As soon as Tolstoy notices Dazai has caught him, his lips curl up into a smirk and he raises his drink. Dazai’s expression is cold as he looks away, seeking out Mishima only to find the man nowhere to be found.
Hm.
Chuuya and Kouyou are entertaining idle conversation with two executives of the Sun and Steel, both keeping a sharp eye on where you and Dazai sway on the dance floor. Piano Man is entertaining several politicians, doing a good job at ensuring that none of the other foreign executives get any chance to get their ears. Ace, Dazai notes, is in deep conversation in the shadows with one of the executives of the Three Deaths. 
Interesting.
He finally draws his attention back to you, a small smile on his lips as he recalls what you’d said to drag him from his spiral.
Osamu,
“You called me Osamu,” he murmurs, a warm feeling spreading through his chest as he focuses on that instead, trying to ease himself back into reality. Technically, he’s heard you say his given name before. Well. Not technically. It was never you and it was never him, rather it was vague memories of other yous and other hims, but it was nothing in comparison to hearing you actually say it.
You look embarrassed, averting your gaze. “I didn’t know how to get your attention, I’m s-”
“Say it again,” he whispers, lifting his hand back up to your chin to tilt your face back up, forcing you to look at him. His eyes search yours, watching the way you can hardly hold his gaze. You look hesitant, so he continues with, “Please.”
“... Osamu,” you say again, breathless, and god, Dazai wishes the two of you were anywhere but here. He wants to press you back against his bed, run his lips up and down your body, map out all of your curves with his hand. He wants to watch you come undone on his tongue and on his fingers—he wants you, he wants you more than anything else in the world. Every time he’s tried to take the next step with you the past few weeks, he either got interrupted by work or he ended up getting cold feet, nervous about making a mistake. 
Before his thoughts can spiral even more, the music picks up to a faster paced waltz. Your eyes widen, watching as all of the other couples shift into the respective dance. You look up at him, a bit panicked, clearly not sure what to do, and his lips curl up in amusement, beckoning you to lace your fingers with his to take the stance the other couples were taking.
“I don’t know this da-” you begin, voice hushed.
“Just follow my lead,” he repeats the same words he spoke to you when they entered the hall. “You’ll be fine. Trust me.”
You exhale, studying his face for a moment before sighing and mimicking the stance the other women took with their partners. He can feel your fingers wavering against his as he interlocks your fingers and he rubs his thumb over the back of your hand soothingly.
“Keep your eyes on me,” he tells you, just as the music finally picks up for the dance to start. 
He thinks you’re worried for nothing. You moved smoothly in line with him and in tune with the music, gliding across the dance floor as if you’ve danced with him hundreds of times before, your body so in sync with his that the two of you put all of the other couples to shame. Not that any of them matter, of course, you’re all that Dazai can focus on. Your eyes never leave his, not even for the sparest of moments, and Dazai feels like he’s caught in a trance, lost in your eyes and the feeling of your body so close to his, hyper aware of the way your your hand rests on his shoulder and the way your fingers are wrapped tight around his.
God, there’s something so otherworldly about you. Doesn’t know if it’s heavenly or supernatural, if you’re his angel sent to lead him to salvation or his very own siren singing a sweet melody to lead him to ruin. Doesn’t think he cares either way—salvation, damnation, none of it matters as long as he has you.
“Not so bad, hm?” he murmurs, sweeping you out into a spin before pulling you back to him, closer this time. He can feel your chest brush his and he prays you can’t feel the way he’s lost control of his heart, painfully cognizant of the erratic thumping. His hand slides from your hip to the small of your back, holding you close to him. He could stay in this moment forever, surroundings drowning out; all he can see is you, all that matters is you.
“Yeah,” you say softly. “Not so bad.”
His lips part to respond but he’s interrupted when he sees movement from the corner of his eye, freezing.
“Dazai.”
Dazai stiffens as a familiar voice speaks from behind him, shifting to stand partially in front of you as his gaze cuts to the side to see Mishima’s familiar figure standing a few feet away. Turning to face him, he asks, “Do you need something?”
“I’d like to speak to you before we meet with Tolstoy, Nabokov and Cao.”
Mishima’s voice leaves no room for argument, dark eyes absent of any emotion as he waits for Dazai to follow him. Dazai’s jaw tightens, eyes drifting back to you as he tries to figure out what to do. He can’t leave you here, not with Cao’s hawk-like gaze trained on the dancefloor and Tolstoy waiting for the opportunity to make a move. But he does need to talk to Mishima, have some idea of where he stands with the Sun and Steel before facing all of the foreigners. 
“May I have this dance?” 
Dazai hadn’t even heard Chuuya approach, turning to the side to watch as he holds a hand out toward you expectantly, quick to step in to take Dazai’s place so that you’re not alone. You shoot Dazai a concerned glance, brows furrowing a bit, before you place your hand in Chuuya’s.
Chuuya leads you back onto the dance floor, Dazai’s gaze lingers for a few moments, a bitter feeling spreads through his chest because that should be him, and it’s wholly unfair that he has to deal with all of this unsavory business when he should be spending time with you.
He should just kill them all here and be done with it.
The words ring through his head, echoing, tempting. He inhales and forces himself to look away as you loop your arms around Chuuya’s shoulders, swaying in tune to the slow song playing. He turns his attention back to Mishima, voice cool and expression void of emotion:
“Speak.”
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Dancing with Nakahara Chuuya is awkward. Awkward is even being generous. It’s not like he’s a bad dancer—in fact, it’s clear that he’s a very good one. He’s smooth on his feet as he spins you around the dance floor, but he’s so stiff. He’s careful to keep space between the two of you, hands never dipping lower than your sides, lips pressed together. He hardly even looks at you, his attention is more on where Dazai had stepped to the side to speak with the dark-haired man who’d interrupted the two of you, but you’re grateful for it, because it’s giving you a chance to gather your thoughts.
You think Dazai might’ve inadvertently confirmed your suspicions from yesterday. You don’t know who these people are, but there’s no way any ordinary business event would be dangerous enough for Dazai to genuinely worry that someone might kill you in a room crowded with two hundred people. A part of you wonders if it’s just different for ability users, that they’re not scared of committing crimes in public because they have an ability that prevents them from getting caught, but you know you’re just trying to make excuses at this point.
Your gaze drifts back over to the older, light-haired man with dark eyes who’d approached you and Dazai when you walked in. He’s off to the side talking with a Chinese man dressed in a red suit—your gaze lingers, trying to piece together the puzzle in your head desperately, but all of the edges are jagged and confusing, you can’t seem to figure out where they each fit with each other. 
You’d thought maybe that Dazai and his business was somehow affiliated with the mafia, because no one with the amount of money and success that he has gets it cleanly, but now you can’t help but hesitate, reconsidering your original theory. Vladimir Nabokov had been scared of Dazai. And it’s not like you haven’t noticed the effect that Dazai has on people. Whenever you’re around people with him, they get tense and on edge, but it’s different seeing the effect he has on someone who doesn’t even work for him, a foreigner supposed to be one of Dazai’s associates if you understood what he meant about not showing up to a meeting. 
Who are you, Dazai?
You don’t even know if you want to know. You love Dazai. You do. You knew it earlier in the night. You know it now. It’s something you can no longer hide or deny. You remember the concerned look on his face when he saw how upset you were. You can feel the way his lips brushed the nape of your neck as he explained why he kept meeting you at the club, the way he kissed your ankles as he knelt in front of you and told you how he was selfish for keeping you around, how he kissed your palm and leaned into your touch as he promised you anything you want. God, you love him, you don’t think anyone has ever looked at you the way he does; no one has ever spoken to you the way he does. 
You love him, and it scares you because you’re realizing you still don’t know anything about him, not really, and you’re also realizing that there’s a high chance he’s been lying to you about what he does. It scares you even more that your first instinct isn’t to run. Because you should run. This should make you run. He brought you to an event with people so dangerous that he’s afraid they might try to hurt you, or worse, but you don’t want to run, because you’d be running from him and you don’t want to run from him. 
Could you sacrifice everything for him though?
Fuck your morals—everything you’ve worked for, all of the years slaving away to put yourself on the path to success. You’ve told yourself your entire life that it would be all you would focus on, that it would all be worth it in the end. You convinced yourself that maybe if you proved yourself enough, your brother would return to your life; he’d be proud of you and he’d come back to you. You know he’s still out there somewhere, you get letters with no return address every month—the only thing in the envelope is a check with a dubious amount of money, but it’s in his hand writing, so you know it’s him. 
A part of you wants to cry, frustration clawing at your chest: the future you’ve worked so hard for, or love? The question you’ve dreaded since your epiphany yesterday is finally thrown right in front of your face, and you need an answer. The two are mutually exclusive—you will not be able to pursue the career you want with Dazai Osamu, not in the way you want at least. And you don’t want to do all of this work to just end up being another shady politician.
“Penny for your thoughts?” 
Your gaze snaps up to Chuuya, who’s suddenly looking at you, and you don’t really know how to respond. 
I’m pretty sure you guys are part of the fucking Mafia and you’re all hiding it from me, but also I don’t want to know if you are because that’s going to force me to make a decision that I don’t want to make so I’d rather live in ignorance. 
“My thoughts are only worth a penny?” You deflect with a grin instead, hoping it meets your eyes.
It doesn’t, evidently, because Chuuya’s eyes narrow a bit, and then he tilts his head to the side and hits you with a more direct: “What’s wrong?”
“I’m just worried,” you finally say, not entirely lying but also not telling the truth. 
“About?” Chuuya presses and you sigh, exhaling a bit.
“He mentioned that there were dangerous people here,” you tell him quietly. “I’m just nervous for when you guys go to your meeting… I’m guessing it’s going to be soon.”
Chuuya’s brows furrow and you can see the thoughts racing behind his eyes before he speaks again. “You’ll be fine,” he tells you. “We have people all over the event hall, and Tachihara is going to sit with you until you Dazai can get back. Dazai shouldn’t have worried you with all of this. He shouldn’t have even-”
He cuts himself off, jaw tightening, but you know what he’s going to say: he shouldn’t have even brought you here.
“I don’t know what he’s thinking,” Chuuya says quietly, and you think he might be talking more to himself than anything else now, but you listen anyway. “He’s always been hard to read but this is…”
He stops speaking out loud, as if he’s realized that you’re there again, and instead he shakes his head. “You’ll be fine. Back at the headquarters before you know it.”
You aren’t so sure.
Your gaze drifts to the side as you watch Nabokov and the Chinese man make their way over to Dazai and the man he’s talking to. The blonde at the bar that Dazai kept looking at also stands up, drink in his hand as walks in the same direction. 
Chuuya spits out a curse under his breath and gives you an apologetic look. Your heart sinks and your throat feels a bit tight—he doesn’t abandon you right away though, pressing his hand to the middle of your back as he guides you across the dancefloor to the bar, all the while keeping a keen eye on what’s happening on the other side of the room.
He pulls the barstool out for you, eyes still trained on where Dazai is standing with Kouyou, two men that work for him you haven’t met yet, and the four men you assume are business associates of his. Dazai is looking at you, an indecipherable expression on his face. You’re looking at him, suddenly anxious at the thought of being left alone, a bad feeling sweeping over you. 
“Tachihara will be over here soon,” Chuuya finally says to you, tearing his gaze from his coworkers to look back down at you. He flags down the bartender to order a drink for you. “You’ll be fine. Knowing Dazai, the meeting won’t last long anyway.”
Your shoulders only slump a bit as you nod, thanking the bartender quietly for your drink as he hurries to bring it back to you, taking a sip of it. Chuuya doesn’t say much else—once you’re settled in your seat and have your drink, he squeezes your shoulder before making his way back over to the intimidating group of people standing on the opposite side of the room.
Your gaze meets Dazai’s conflicted one one last time before he’s forced to turn away and disappears down a side hall deeper into the building. You sigh as you twirl your drink around, the clear liquid sloshing dangerously close to the brim of your glass as your eyes twist around the event hall, seeking out Tachihara, or Atsushi, or anyone that works with Dazai because you’re feeling distinctly vulnerable alone. You find none of them. You can feel eyes on you—most you’re sure are harmless curiosity, wanting to know who exactly came in on the arm of Dazai Osamu, but you know some aren’t nearly as harmless, you can feel the hungry stares of vicious opportunists directed at your back and you don’t feel comfortable sitting alone.
You don’t even get five minutes to yourself.
“Is this seat taken?” 
You’re startled by the unfamiliar voice, head snapping to the side. Your gaze focuses on a pretty man with soft features, shoulder-length black hair and gentle purple eyes. Your lips part to speak, but no words leave them, caught off-guard by his sudden appearance. He looks harmless enough, but there’s something about him that has you on edge—something simmering beneath the surface of his deceptive eyes that you can’t quite place but you know you don’t like.
“I mean no harm,” he says smoothly, lips curving up into an amiable smile. “I’m an old friend of Dazai’s. I only want to talk.”
An old friend. You don’t buy it, but you don’t want to risk antagonizing him, Dazai’s warning about the many lethal ability users prowling the event ringing through your head. You just hope that Tachihara shows up sooner rather than later as you finally shake your head.
“It’s not taken,” you say quietly, motioning to the stool as you take another generous sip of your drink.
The dark-haired man smiles at you as he takes a seat at the bar next to you, teeth glimmering like knives beneath the lighting of the chandelier. Instantly, you feel like you’ve made a mistake, a chill running down your spine as your eyes meet purple ones that are not quite so gentle anymore. Sharp and shrewd instead. Calculating. Dangerous. 
“Fyodor Dostoevsky. A pleasure, truly.”
314 notes · View notes
waterlilydrops · 2 days
Text
Archive
It’s part 2 of THIS :)
pairing: Lewis Hamilton x fem!reader
summary: your new sex routine with Lewis: having sex while watching your sex tapes.
word count: 2k
warning: 18+ only, nsfw, explicit sex content, sex tapes, oral sex(m received), P in V sex, dirty talk, slightly Dom/Sub, spanking, praise kink. If you feel uncomfortable, please exit promptly.
note: Italicized text represents the content and dialogue from the video. That idea was sparked by an anon, thank you! As always, welcome any advice or suggestions.
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“Baby, which one should we watch today?”Lewis took out the videotapes and placed them on the cabinet, looking at the marker-penned labels as he asked, “The Christmas one? Or the one I made you cum with my fingers?”
You lightly tapped his shoulder. “Hey, that wasn’t just about me.”
He gazed at you intently, black eyes filled with earnestness, “But you looked especially beautiful when you cum.” As if to say tonight’s dinner was particularly good.
That time was really intense. What happened again? Oh, you think it was because you both had a bit to drink. Does alcohol-free tequila also make people drunk? Once in a tipsy mood, after a few kisses, desire surged like a tidal wave.
Lewis turned off all the indoor lights, leaving only a floor lamp on.
“Hey, today was dd/mm/yy.” In the scene, a gentle flush colored your cheekbones, and your eyes sparkled with a radiant smile.
Ah, how did we get into that state? Did we have a few drinks then?
“Here is... Lewis.” The next second, like a beacon of charisma, Lewis’s face emerged in the frame, his beautiful brown skin radiant under the lights.
The video suddenly paused.
“What’s wrong?” You turned to look at him.
“Can we have a competition?” Okay, his desire to win extended beyond the race track.
“What are we competing in?”
“Whoever initiates the kiss first loses.”
As the video resumed, his arms wrapped around your middle as he hugged you tightly into his chest, and one of his hands slid down between your legs.
“Take your clothes off, Lewis.”
Were you always this direct when you were tipsy?
Sure enough, the next moment his palm rested on your mound. But surprisingly, he just left it there, without making any further moves.
In the video, the two of you had already started stripping each other’s clothes off. The camera was placed on the bedside table. With rustling sounds, you hastily removed your clothes, letting them fall to the floor, and without a pause, you began kissing passionately.
As the camera zoomed in on the intense kiss between you and Lewis, you shifted in your seat, feeling your tongue moistening your lips in anticipation. Your inner thighs brushed against his wrist, nestled between them, and you sensed a delicious dampness beginning to seep through your panties.
You couldn’t get wet that soon. Otherwise, it would seem too eager.
You stole a glance at Lewis’s profile beside you. the contours of his strong nose and the hint of a well-groomed beard were illuminated softly by the ambient light. He was completely absorbed in watching.
The sound of kissing in the video was accompanied by a soft, wet noise.
Damn, regretting it now. Why did you make it a competition? He should be kissing you right now. You really want it, your whole body is tense, wanting to be devoured by him.
Your eyes stared fixedly at the video, how could Lewis be so whole-heartedly in just a kiss?
You were pulled closer by Lewis, his hand on your neck, while his other arm wrapped around your waist, kneading your butt.
The hand between your thighs finally reacted a bit, pressing down on your mound at an extremely slow pace. You squeezed his hand between your legs, grinding against his hips while reaching out to touch his chest. Your palm, through his T-shirt, gripped tightly, eliciting a soft moan.
The camera zoomed in, revealing his abs tensing and relaxing. Your throat involuntarily swallowed drools as your hand slid down from Lewis's chest to his thighs.
With a few swift movements, his underwear was pulled down, and his semi-erect cock sprang out. Your smaller hand grasped it the next second, stroking it gently up and down.
“The way you get hard is so sexy...”
“well,” his strong arm appeared in the frame, probably caressing your face from the angle, “but you, baby, are even sexier.”
A rush of heat surged through your body. His low laughter, filtered through the speakers, only made it itchier, so you discreetly rubbed against the bedsheet, your hand slipping into Lewis‘s waistband. After a few strokes through his underwear, you couldn’t resist anymore.
That weighty thing was too enticing, and you wanted to feel it now.
You relenting and tugging his boxers down. Your mouth waters as his hard cock springs free, slapping against his navel with a lewd sound. You don’t hesitate to wrap your hand around the base, angling his pretty length towards your mouth.
No kissing. that’s mean I can kiss his cock?
You lean your head down, suck just the tip into your mouth, swirling your tongue over his sensitive head. satisfied, and deliberately squinting your eyes as you looked up at Lewis.
“you’re breaking the rules...”
“Rules—” You slowly opened your mouth, allowing the head of his cock to slide into your mouth, and let your tongue swirl around it. “are meant to be broke, right?”
As you finished speaking, you performed several deepthroats, emitting soft moans as your lips hugged the base of the penis, causing Lewis to gasp urgently. You were quite satisfied with the current situation, able to both suck his cock and escape the video, at least for a while.
“You like that, don’t you?”You asked in a muffled voice because your mouth was occupied.
“Didn’t your family teach you not to talk with your mouth full?” Lewis shot back in a cross between an annoyed and sexy tone.
All Lewis received for his effort was you caressing his sacks, and the gentle touch of you cheek against his throbbing member made Lewis clench his fists as he growled.
You raised your eyelids, meeting Lewis’s gaze. The non-kissing contest came to an immediate end.
You were pulled up by the arm and your mouth was covered, Lewis devouring your lips as if starving for days.
There we go. That’s more like it.
“You lost.”
“Yeah, what reward do you want?”
“Spank me.”
The eighth.
You inhaled deeply, silently counting in your mind.
Kneeling on the bed, your buttocks raised high. The only downside is that with a slight lift of your head, you could see the tangled couple on the screen (Currently, you were making loud noises because you were being fingered). Lewis deliberately positioned you facing the screen. Your ears were filled with your own moans and gasps. You momentarily buried your head in your arms in an attempt to escape. Both cheeks were burning with heat, but there was a subtle sense of satisfaction in your heart. Lewis indeed fulfilled his promise, delivering firm strikes with gusto, not holding back at all.
“Feel good?”Lewis laid you back, your head dipping between the pillows.
He was quick to get you out of your panties, he was quick to press his cock to your twitching clit. A steady hand dragged his cock up and down your folds, the cock catching on your bud each time. 
“Sir…” You whined, you needed his fat cock so bad. You needed to be plugged up before you sprang a leak. when your drippy cunt squelched, the slick, gushy sounds went straight to his cock as it jumped.
Up and down, up and down. Lewis guided his cock over your clit, and past your fleshy folds, teasing your needy hole by stretching you out with just the tip. Then he pulled out. When he finally fucking pushed into your warmth, you squeezed him tight, he sank in till all of him was wrapped up in your cunt.
The momentarily neglected video suddenly emitted the moans of you two. You reflexively raised your eyes to see Lewis fully inserting his shaft into your pussy.
“It’s all in.”
The feeling of the cock entering you made you toss your head back and moan, bit your lip and didn’t breath as Lewis inched deeper.
“Mmm...You’re so big, ahh, I like it.”
“You were so honest about it... Is alcohol really that magical?” Lewis teased as slowly pulled his dick out and then pushed it back in making your wet pussy sputter out the sound you both loved hearing so much.
Fuck... Is it because of doggy style? Lewis were particularly vigorous today, thrusting exceptionally deep.
“Ahhhh! O-Ohh god!” Your eyes rolled back when Lewis’s hand held onto your waist as he moved inside you in a fast and rough pace as his other hand pulled your hair making you arch your back making him hit a really good spot.
You felt him slightly pull his cock out before ramming back inside making you moan out loud because of the sudden pleasure, his shaft reached so deep because of a one deep thrust.
During sex, Lewis was very good at praising. Or rather, he was someone who frequently gave compliments even in everyday situations, but during sex, he was more straightforward with his praise, saying exactly what he felt. Even in the current video, his compliments were non-stop—
“Your pussy is so good…”
“You’re so delicious babe... I could fuck you all day…”
“Look at you, my beautiful gooey slit…”
These deep, seductive whispers, like the voice of a god of desire, swirled around in your mind, turning your rationality into chaos... There’s no need to even look at the video; just the sound alone was enough to intoxicate you. You closed your eyes drowsily, involuntarily matching Lewis’s pelvic thrusts, chasing after pleasure, indulging in the sensation...
“You’re silent today, huh?” Lewis bit down on your neck, leaving it all puffy. His pace slowed, focusing on giving it to you slow and deep, circling his hips so you felt every inch of him. The slow, sticky grind made a wet noise.
Your legs were now shaking as you were already nearing your climax. You tightly gripped the sheets.
“Ohh! D-Don’t hit me there t-too much!”You exclaimed as he continuously hit your favorite spot. He leaned on your back and grabbed your chin making you tilt your head to his direction. His big hand grabbed your tits as he pinched your nipple.
“You’re making me cum, little slut.” Lewis whispered and his thrusts became sloppier, you held onto his thighs, burying your nails in them. “A-Ahh! P-Please! Please! Ohh god!”
"Please what baby?" He teased.
“P-Please let me cum… Let me cum sir—ahh!” You loudly moaned when he moved inside you ruthlessly as his other hand found its way to your clit.
“Then cum. Cum with me.” Lewis sucked on your neck while thrusting as deep and quickly as he could to bring himself to an orgasm. His grunts of power echoed through the room and mix with yours. As you were fucked to an earth shattering climax, he erupted inside of you.
“Y/N, open your eyes.”
Your eyes barely opened, and you saw yourself on the video squirting gently, your legs convulsed spasmodically, your pussy continued dripping.
Your ass was still red, Lewis spread you open to see how your cunt gaped, empty without his fat cock, his seed dribbled out as your pussy contracted, spilling down your ass crack.
As your breathing gradually calmed, the room became quiet.
“Can I film your little hole?”
Both of you instantly turned towards the only source of sound in the room. On the video was an obviously just-squirted you.
The camera shook for a moment, and Lewis’s voice came through again:
“Oh, it’s twitching...”
You weakly emitted a groan. The camera shook again, and your ass and thighs appeared in the frame. Lewis’s fingers, coated with cum, entered the frame, gently stroking the entrance a few times before spreading it open with two fingers, aiming the camera there.
You leaned into Lewis’s embrace, burying your head in his neck, refusing to look. Meanwhile, the voice on the video, now synced with him nibbling your earlobe, said:
“I really love you. I love you the most.”
The video ended there. Lewis gently kissed the top of your head, his hand smoothing over your back. From his neck, a muffled voice emerged:
“I love you too.”
“Yeah, that’s it, the boys are gonna lose their minds.”
“Suck on it, good girl…”
“Ahhh, you are so hot, looking up at me like that, choking on my cock…”
“Ohh, when the boys see this, they are going to get rock hard…”
“Do you like that? my friends watching a video of you sucking me?”
324 notes · View notes
katsukisbimbo · 3 days
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Silver haze: Peach Ringz
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- pairing: ryomen sukuna × reader, gojo satoru x reader, getou suguru × reader, (slight gojo × getou)
- synopsis: who knew letting your fuck buddy roll on your back would lead to sweet forehead kisses and naps
- wordcount: 2.7k
- warning: fem! reader, she/her pronouns, squirting, car sex, use of drugs, smoking, mentions of marijuana, oral, throatfucking, slight dubcon, unprotected sex, degradation, sub/dom themes, creampie, slight size kink, mention of panty sniffing, mention of panty tasting >.<
part one and two
- note: after 3 years of hiatus, i birth this. please enjoy. also for my weed smokers, try the strain peach ringz, it tastes like peaches!
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Your eyes widened in fear, the voice startling you to the point where you felt as if your heart was going to jump out of your mouth. You scrambled to cover yourself, Sukuna watching in amusement as he did not move to even protect his decency.
“Why do you always have to fuck things up Yuji?” Sukuna sighs, palm slapping the top of Yuji’s head.
Yuji swats his hand away and grumbles under his breath before speaking. “If anything I’m saving our sweet soon-to-be manager from your corruption.” He points accusingly. “She’s so sweet and you’re taking advantage of her!”. His words echo through your mind, various thoughts rushing from the back of your head as you start to overthink. Has he been using you? What did you even expect from your little excursions with him?
“Hey, if anything, she’s using me.” Sukuna rolls his eyes, wrapping an arm around your waist to press you tight against his warm body. Yuji turns to face you now, eyes filled with concern and a hint of sympathy.
“Would you like me to take you home? My car’s just around the building. I bet you’re feeling a little cold right now.” His eyes soften. “I can turn on the seat warmer for you. I promise I’ll get you home safe.”
You slowly just nod your head, body and mind on autopilot as you slowly slip away from Sukuna’s grip and he lets you. Disappointment fills his entire being but he doesn’t let it show, but you’re too distraught to notice anyway.
Yuji takes you by the hand and quickly takes his sweater off to place around your shoulders, securing it before wrapping an arm around you and walking away from an irritated Sukuna, his cock now flaccid.
___
The car ride home was a blur, the event had left you feeling dismayed and a tad humiliated. It was your first day meeting Yuji and he had seen you in such a compromising position with his teammate, and in public as well! Thoughts of leaving the country and changing your name were heavy on your mind, but you knew it wasn’t the wisest decision especially when you have Suguru and Satoru to care for.
“Babe? You home?” a voice calls out.
Satoru probably, you think. You take your comforter and pull it over your head, dread filling each nerve of your body. This whole day has been a weird blur and all you’d like to do is sleep and pretend it never happened.
“Baby? What’s wrong?” Suguru asks, voice brimming with concern. He knew, they both knew, but they wanted to know what you would say. If you’d keep your little shenanigan up and lie to them once more.
“Please leave me alone.” You mumble, voice muffled by the thick comforter still covering your head. You feel comfortable and safe, but it is at that moment when Satoru decides he’s had enough and rips away your comfort and safety straight through your fingertips.
Before a yelp even leaves your throat, you’re being tackled by two oversized grown babies, each at your sides. Their limbs are long and wrapping around you, fingertips desperately but gently digging into whatever skin they can find. And their faces are close, so close you can smell the skin of their necks and cheeks, their pheromones causing you to sigh in delight.
“You both smell so good.” You sigh once more, eyes shut in absolute bliss as Satoru slowly starts mouthing at your neck, a trail of pecks with the occasional tongue darting out to taste you. But it was okay, Satoru always did weird things like this.
Suguru placed his large hand on top of your chest, palm cupping your breast, but even that was normal too. You three just had a close and affectionate relationship. There was nothing wrong with that. At least that’s what they both had told you.
“I know. You’re a weird little freak who likes to sniff me.” Suguru laughs, index finger tracing around your nipple and smirking when he sees your little bud stiffen up from a mere touch. Your breath hitches, maybe his finger just slipped.
“No, I’m not, I’m not Satoru.” You huff.
“Yeah, he’s worse. He likes to sniff your panties when you’re gone.”
“Are you fucking serious? Satoru!” A loud smack echoes through the room followed by obnoxious laughter and yelling.
“I was just sniffing it but HE was tasting it!”
“You both better be fucking with me!”
“Of course we are, we’re not crazy.”
They were.
___
A few days had gone by without seeing Sukuna, you decided that it would be better to turn down the position you were offered. In your opinion, Sukuna hadn’t done anything wrong, you’re a consenting adult and you liked it.
But it was just the embarrassment as well and his indifference to both of you getting caught in the act. You knew your relationship wasn’t serious, but you at least thought he would’ve cared a little more about your well-being and feelings.
You are human after all.
“Hey beautiful,” A familiar voice whispers in your ear. “Haven’t seen you in a while. Was that on purpose?”
You suppress the urge to roll your eyes to the back of your skull. Of course, it was on purpose and he knew that. He wasn’t stupid. “Take a guess.” You grumble, not even sparing him a glance as you speed up a little. His large hand grabs your forearm and spins you to face him, pulling you against his body, an odd habit of his.
“Can we at least talk? Maybe sit down in my car so we can have a private space? I’ll drive us somewhere quiet. I just wanna apologize.” You look at him with a raised brow and he sighs, raking his free hand through his unruly pink hair. “Jus’ hear me out, princess.”
___
You watch him as he rolls a spliff on his lap, his little weed bag containing jars of weed, a grinder, papers, and a pen. You weren’t sure what the pen was for. Maybe for emergencies.
“Do you have to smoke every time we sit in your car?” You grimace as he lights it, the pungent smell hitting you quickly. He smirks a little and wraps his pink lips around the filter, taking a long drag before turning and blowing it towards your face.
“Yeah, I do. What else am I gonna do? Not smoke?” He raises a brow. You roll your eyes. He offers you a toke and you gladly take it, needing to expel the irritation and stress coursing through your veins.
“I’m really sorry pretty girl, I am.” He starts and looks down at your lap, unable to meet your eyes as you take a few more hits. “I was a dick. I still am. I should’ve covered you up n shit.” He sighs. “Yuji ripped me a new one after he dropped you off. I feel really bad ‘nd I jus’ wanted to say I’m sorry baby.”
The weed in your system causes you to just lightly nod your head, eyes nearly fluttering shut as the familiar feeling of being high rolls through your body in what feels like waves. Your eyes shut and you feel the spliff being taken from your fingertips.
“Say something, princess.”
“S’fine. Don’t worry ‘bout it. Just have some respect for me, that’s all.” You whisper lightly.
“I promise I’ll respect you so good baby.” He grins, handing you the spliff to take the last few tokes. “So…” He starts. “We’re good now right?”
“Yeah. Why?”
“Can you suck my dick?”
“…Yeah.”
He quickly discards the roach, a giddy smile on his face as he hastily unzips his pants, not even taking the time to lower them and only pulling his stiff cock out, giving it a few strokes. You watch, entranced by the way his precum pools at the tip.
You can’t help the way your thighs squeeze and your mouth fills up with saliva. “Taste it, baby, I wanna see your slutty lips around my tip.” He speaks huskily while stroking the base of his fat cock.
You find yourself leaning over, seatbelt off in a flash and his cock in your mouth, tongue licking up his leaking cock. Sukuna throws his head back in bliss, a shaky sigh escaping his lips. All he can think about is fucking your slutty mouth ‘til you’re choking down his cum. He can’t decide if he wants to cum down your throat or cum all over your pretty face.
“Yeah, you like that? You like the way my cock tastes? Throat that shit baby, I wanna feel your throat squeeze my cock.” You feel his large hand on top of your head pushing you down, and you let him. You like it, you hate to admit it but you like the way he treats you. It feels so lewd and so wrong but it makes your pussy wet anyway.
“Fuck my dicks already numb baby. I need another fucking spliff.” He mumbles before reaching for his little bag once more. “Keep sucking my dick baby. I’m jus' gonna roll on your back so don’t go too crazy yeah?” You garble out a response, throat tightening around his cock.
You continue to slobber and lick at his cock, careful to not move your back too much as you feel his jars lined up on your spine, his grinder and tray placed carefully on the left side of your back. “You’re so fucking good for me baby, my dirty little slut sucking my cock. Fuck. You look so fucking good.” He groans, licking the paper and smoothening the sides to make the perfect cone. He then uses the pen to lightly push the contents inside, making sure to not stuff it too much.
“Almost done baby. Lemme get all this off of you and I’ll face fuck you.” You moan in response, feeling yourself relax a tad when you feel the pressure taken off of your back. He lights his spliff and you take that as a moment to catch your breath, pulling off his spit-soaked cock.
He whips his head and glares at you. He wants to be mad, but seeing your face streaming with tears, covered in precum and spit. He feels like he wants to give you a baby right then and there.
“Did I say you can stop sucking? You’re my sex slave. You do whatever the fuck I tell you to. So fucking do what I say or else I won’t fuck you.” He growls, his heavy hand smacking your ass swiftly and pushing your head back down on his throbbing dick.
“Show me you’re sorry baby. I wanna see how fucking sorry you are.” You nod tearfully. Your hand cups his balls, squeezing and playing with them in your palms. “Oh fuck.” He moans, head thrown back with his spliff held between his lips.
You relax your throat and swallow his entire cock, your face pressed tight against his pelvis. His fingers dig into your scalp, loud moans leaving his lips. “Shit. Fuck. Stay down there. Keep it down your throat baby.” You start gagging, your untrained throat failing you. “Imma cum baby, imma give your throat a fat fucking load ‘cuz you deserve it.” He moans, shallowly fucking his cock down your throat.
You feel his entire body go stiff, a loud moan breaking the short silence. You feel his cock twitching down as well as his cum going straight down your throat, his cock lodged so deep inside that swallowing was unnecessary.
He wasn’t lying, he did have a big load. You pull your head back, coughing and spitting out his large load. Your chest heaves as you catch your breath. Everything feels wet and sticky. Your saliva had dripped down your chin and soaked your shirt. You’ve soaked through your panties and you can feel your thighs sticking to the leather of the seat as you sit back down.
“Tissue?” You croak out, looking at him as his chest heaves. His eyes snap open. “No.” He states bluntly. “What do you mean no? Look at me! I’m so messy!” You complain, feeling the remnants of his cum drying on your skin.
“Get in the back. I’m gonna fuck you.”
“Can I at least clean—“
“Get in the fucking back.”
___
“Suguru, she’s not answering her phone.” Gojo whines. He was a petulant child indeed. Getou sighs, irritation building. He knows where you are and who you’re with. He’s just not sure what to do about it. He wants you. Both of them do.
Sure, Gojo’s a bit more straightforward and spoiled, always expecting everyone to bend to his will. But Getou knew that if you made your choice, there would be no changing your mind.
“Hello? Suguru? Are you ignoring me?” Gojo whines once more, stomping his foot like once again, a petulant child. Getou sighs in annoyance.
“Stop acting like a kid. You know where she is, and you know what she’s doing.” He pauses. “What do you wanna do about it?”
Gojo smirks.
“I have an idea, I’m just not sure you’re up for it.”
___
The world's spinning. At this point, you’re ready to leave the earth. Your body’s gone numb and you’re struggling to breathe once more as Sukuna tightens his grip on your throat.
You’re laying on your back in the backseat of his car, legs hooked over his shoulders as he fucks into you, slow but rough. His cock batters against your cervix causing your toes to curl in both pain and pleasure.
“You’re so fucking creamy holy shit. I’m gonna have to detail my car after this.” He laughs lightly. “Every time I squeeze your throat your pussy gets tighter.” He moans, fucking into you harder.
“I wanna see you squirt on my dick baby. You think you can?”
“M-Maybe, I’ve never squirted before.” You squeal when his thumb slides down your entire abdomen and presses against your clit, the rough pads of his fingers expertly playing with your sensitive parts. He watches your facial expressions attentively, figuring out what feels good and what doesn’t.
He craves to have you lose yourself on his cock. He wants you completely dick-drunk and bending to his will. He knows you can. You’ve been so good for him, it feels as if you could be the one for him.
“Sukuna!” You moan. You feel the pressure building in your abdomen. Your pussy grips his cock tighter and you feel as if you’re about to cum, eyes rolling back into their sockets. “‘M g’nna squirt!” You mumble, too far gone in your pleasure.
“Yeah? Squirt baby. I wanna feel you soak my cock. Squirt for me and only me.” He groans, his fingers digging into the plush of your thighs as he feels your cunt squeeze around him. He doesn’t know how much longer until he loses himself. But he knows he wants you to cum first.
The pressure in your abdomen snaps and a string of whines and moans fall from your lips. Your whole body trembles as you squirt, soaking your entire bottom half as well as Sukuna’s. But he’s not satisfied. He wants much more. He continues to bully your clit with his thumb, synchronizing each thrust with a roll of your bud.
“S’kuna! I can’t! Too sensitive!” You squeal, hands gripping his forearm tightly but he doesn’t let up. He knows what he wants and he’s gonna have it.
“I’m gonna fill this fucking pussy up. I don’t give a fuck about your two bodyguards.”
“Wait! Don’t!”
“I don’t care.” He smacks your hands away. He grips your wrists in his large hand and pins them above your head, his other hand occupied.
“I’m cumming baby~” He moans, thrusting his dick as deep as his can, grinding his tip against your bruised cervix as his cum paints your walls white.
You’re both left trembling and heaving, his cock still twitching and emptying itself inside your cunt. You wonder if you’ll be able to experience this type of sex with anyone else. Or if you’ll think about the way Sukuna makes you feel your entire life.
“Wanna go back to my place and nap? We can pick up some Wingstop.” He gives you a toothy grin before kissing your forehead. You can’t do anything but nod tiredly, throat still sore from Sukuna’s abuse.
But you wonder, was it normal for fuck buddies to kiss each other's foreheads so gently?
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© katsukisbimbo 2024 — all rights reserved. please refrain from modifying, translating, reposting of any kind. plagiarism will NOT be tolerated. please be kind and enjoy
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barcaatthemoon · 2 days
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red || jenni hermoso x reader ||
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you ask jenni to stop.
minors dni, 18+, smut ahead.
it's not really smutty, but still.
jenni's hands were gripping your hips so tightly that you swore you could feel the bruises forming already. she had been rough with you all day, starting before the two of you had even gotten out of bed. then, it had been more of a playful rough housing. now, she was thrusting her hips into you as hard as she could to make sure that you could feel every inch of her.
it wasn't what you had expected whenever she had taken you back to the bedroom. you were no stranger to jenni's moods, but she wasn't usually this rough for no reason. jenni wasn't jealous, nobody had been around either one of you today. it had been a bit of a lazy day, with the exception of jenni trying to annoy you throughout the afternoon. if anything, you should have been the one to be a bit aggressive in bed.
and in a way, you had been. you had held jenni's head down in between your legs earlier. that wasn't enough to warrant jenni fucking you like this though. it was fairly indulgent, and usually, you'd be fine with that, but it didn't feel right.
"jenni, red. i'm red," you whined. it was quiet, just barely a whisper. you hated interrupting jenni whenever she was focused, but you couldn't take any more. a part of you had said it so quietly that you thought she wouldn't hear you, but jenni was pulling out of you and rolling you onto your back as quickly as she could.
"what's wrong?" jenni asked immediately. her eyes were wide with fear, and you immediately were engulfed in guilt. you hated making jenni feel bad, especially whenever you didn't even know what was wrong. "did i hurt you?"
"n-no, it's not that," you reassured her. jenni looked absolutely distraught as she mentally combed over every little thing she had done that day. you had been a bit snappy with her before dinner, but that wouldn't have caused this. jenni had apologized to you long before the two of you made your way back here.
"is there anything that i can get or do for you?" jenni asked you. she was gentle as she reached towards you. you let her hand come to rest on your arm. slowly, jenni began to pull you into her arms. you hummed happily at the feeling of her holding you. it was soft and nice in all the ways that you realized that you had been craving jenni.
"i'm sorry," you apologized. jenni pulled back a bit. there was a puzzled look on her face. her eyebrows were furrowed deeply as she pouted a little. it was something you usually would have teased her about, rubbing out the furrow as you joked about wrinkles. tonight, you didn't feel like joking, instead going straight for clarity. "i stopped us. i don't think i can keep going. i'm sorry, jenni."
"you have nothing to apologize for, my vida. i'm sorry for not paying better attention to you, okay?" jenni pulled back just enough to force you to look at her.
"but you wanted this. it's been so long," you whispered.
"you tell me to stop, and we stop. i don't care what's happening. all i care about is you. do you understand me?" jenni asked you. you nodded, having completely understood her words. whether or not you took them to heart was a completely different thing. "i need to hear you say it and mean it."
"you care about me. if i need to stop, it's okay to tell you. you won't be mad, because you care." it wasn't word for word, which jenni appreciated. the two of you had been working on properly communicating needs, something that jenni felt was testing her patience. she didn't understand how someone so lovely and caring could be so unkind to themselves.
"thank you. i love you," jenni muttered against your forehead as she pressed a kiss to it.
"i love you too," you told her. jenni was absolutely beaming at your words, and you didn't have to see her to know. the way that she shook you a little as she hugged you told you everything that you needed to know. "what now?"
"that, my dear, is up to you. what would you like to happen?" jenni asked you. you thought a lot about it before deciding on just laying back with her. jenni got out of bed and grabbed some clothes for the two of you. she fished through her side of the closet for a sweatshirt for you to sleep in, along with the softest pair of underwear that jenni could find. you happily accepted the boxer briefs, not commenting on jenni only grabbing a sports bra for herself.
"can you hold me please?" you knew not to be nervous, but it wasn't easy for you to ask for things. jenni smiled as she climbed into bed with you, clad in a black sports bra and a pair of grey joggers. you were pretty sure that the pants were yours since they were both a little loose and too short on jenni.
"of course. i'll always hold you. you don't even have to ask." jenni pressed a kiss to the top of your head as the two of you positioned yourselves comfortably. you laid with your head on jenni's chest and your leg thrown over her body. she was completely trapped between the bed and your body, covered by the comforter, just how she liked it. "good night, mi amor."
"night jenni," you hummed happily.
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effetsecndaires · 3 days
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— 𝐭𝐨𝐤𝐫𝐞𝐯 𝐦𝐞𝐧 (+ 𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐣𝐮) + 𝐧𝐬𝐟𝐰 𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐤𝐬. (𝟑)
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➺ INCLUDES: south terano, shinichiro sano, keizo arashi (benkei), takeomi akashi, mitsuya takashi, senju kawaragi (all of legal age, timeskip or bonten) x fem!reader
➺ CONTENT WARNING | this post contains explicit porn links!! you may need to have a twitter account or change your privacy settings to be able to see them. Please do not interact if you are under 18.
➺ NOTE | i’ll be taking a break from twitter links after this one. I want to focus on actual writing rather than straight up porn lol
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SOUTH.
If there's one thing South loves more than pounding your pussy, it's shoving his cock down your throat. He’ll have you laying on your back with your head hanging off the side of the bed, his cock stuffed deep inside your throat. He’ll wrap his hand around the large bulge and jerk it before withdrawing just long enough to let you breathe, quickly going back to pushing himself all the way down your throat, watching as you swallow him down effortlessly.
↳ LINK ↲
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BENKEI.
Benkei is always so gentle with you. Because of this, you’d think morning sex with him would also be gentle; soft whispers exchanged in each other’s mouths while he gently pushes his cock into you, his hand on your clit helping you reach your climax faster. While this scenario does happen, it doesn't always go the way you think it will. Most times when he's been awake for longer than you have - he'll have you laying down on your belly, one of your legs dangling off the bed as he takes you from behind, your face buried deep into the pillow to muffle your moans, fists twisting the sheets. His hands grip onto your hips and the plump skin of your ass as he chases his high, each thrust bringing the two of you closer to your limit.
↳ LINK ↲
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SHINICHIRO.
Days where Shin has the house to himself are rare, but when he does, the two of you always make the most of it. Those days usually consist of cuddling, making out, and, well, lots of sex. It's the only time when you can be as loud as you want — and most importantly your only opportunity to fuck whenever and wherever you want. You’ll be preparing breakfast in the morning and Shin will have you pressed against the counter before you can even begin to light the stove, his hands pushing your skirt up so he can bury his face between your thighs, starting his day with his favorite breakfast.
↳ LINK ↲
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TAKEOMI.
This man will lose his fucking mind if you give him head, especially if you do it out of nowhere while the two of you are relaxing in bed or watching a movie on the couch. It’ll start with you palming him over his sweatpants, teasing him just long enough to get him hot and bothered, his mind becoming too cloudy to focus on anything outside of you. He’ll lift himself up and push his pants down to his thighs, your lips immediately wrapping around his thick cock, sucking and stroking what doesn't fit in your mouth.
↳ LINK ↲
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MITSUYA.
Mitsuya much prefers giving rather than receiving, which is why he always insists on eating you out before fucking you. You don’t even have to return the favor — he doesn't need it. Don't get me wrong, he does enjoy getting head and he obviously won't refuse a blowjob when you offer him one, but watching you moan and squirm as he coaxes orgasm after orgasm out of you has to be his favorite sight in the world. All he wants is to make you feel good, his hands resting on your ass as you circle your hips and hump his face, pushing his tongue deeper and fucking yourself on it as you sit on his pretty face.
↳ LINK ↲
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SENJU.
Senju eats you out so good, it’s almost embarrassing how quickly she manages to break you into a moaning mess and pull multiple orgasms out of you with just her tongue. She knows exactly what you like, what to do and where to focus in order to get a specific reaction out of you or have you pull her hair just a bit tighter — your moans like music to her ears as she devours you.
↳ LINK ↲
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churipu · 9 hours
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Hellooo! I saw ur reqs wer open and I wanted to know if its oknif ok if u can write abt the jjk men being their for their gf's performance/exhibit for school or work when their family or friends can't make it?
(I love how how the way you write them as well! I found u through the nanami oneshot and I've just been on ur masterlist reading through all of ur fics and drabbles, esp now with me going through the same thing as above 💛)
𝐒𝐎𝐋𝐀𝐂𝐄 𝐈𝐍 𝐀𝐑𝐓 .ᐟ
❪ jjk men showing up in your art exhibition when nobody did ❫
────── 𝕴 . featuring. gojo satoru, nanami kento, itadori yuuji x fem! reader
────── 𝕴 . warnings. none :)
note. hi nonnie :( thank you so much for the love, i'm so sorry for the delay, i'm so sorry that happened to you. i'm 100% sure whatever you were presenting to everyone was awesome! i love you <33
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𝜗𝜚 . GOJO SATORU
gojo has received your heads up regarding an art exhibit a week prior. he'd notice the way you've been very very excited about having your art work presented for people to see. and he's happy to see you happy.
he made it extra clear he wanted nothing with the jujutsu world the day your exhibit was held — all he wanted was a nice and peaceful day to spend with his partner. gojo woke up extra early to send you off, helping you get ready.
the way your smile lit up his morning, he couldn't even get back to sleep right after, seeing how happy you are with today. gojo can't even wait for the time to struck twelve for the exhibition opening, and so he got there an hour early.
he was silent with his movements, a beautiful bouquet of flowers in his grasp as he paced around the crowded area — blue eyes averting everywhere to look for you. with his height, finding you wasn't too hard for him.
pushing through oceans of humans, he stood right in front of you. the solemn look on your face doesn't go unnoticed, "hi, baby."
you look up to see him and crack a smile, "you came."
gojo grins down at you, "of course i did, can't miss my girl's exhibition, can i?" his large hand covered the top of your head, "why the frown? are you not happy to see me?"
chuckling, you shake your head, "no. my parents couldn't make it, they were too busy with work."
and you were so excited to show them your art work too. gojo didn't forget the way you rambled on about how your parents were going to love it — especially when it was dedicated to them. and they butchered it up by choosing work over you.
this time, gojo frowns along with you, "they didn't show up?"
with a shake of your head, gojo pulls you into his embrace, "i'm sorry that happened, show me everything? i arrived here an hour ago to see you, you know?"
"one hour? so early and for what?"
"to see you, silly. i couldn't wait to see all your works," he pressed his lips onto your forehead, "and this is for my beautiful girl."
he handed you the bouquet and laced his fingers with yours, "let's get some food after this? it's a date."
"it's a date!" you smiled, no longer feeling upset.
𝜗𝜚 . NANAMI KENTO
people always tell you to never get excited over small things, but you couldn't help it — the slightest things made you really happy, but at the same time, the slightest things made you sad as well.
i'm sorry, can't come to the exhibit. something came up, i'll try to swing by next time y/n! maybe next year? sorry :(
you read the text over and over again. this should be fine, (friend) was probably just busy with their day so they couldn't drop by — no matter how hard you try to convince yourself that it was fine. you didn't feel like it. they promised.
"i'm sorry i'm late, y/n."
turning around to look at the source of the voice, there stood your boyfriend. sweat dribbling down the side of his face, hair disheveled with shallow and rapid breaths. he looked like he just ran a marathon.
"kento? i thought you couldn't make it—"
nanami shook his head, "i made time for you, i will always make time for you," he gave you a small smile.
"you're not late, just in time actually," you switched your phone off, shoving it inside the back pocket of your jeans, "thank you for coming for me."
he wiped his sweat, standing up straight, stepping towards you, "where are your friends? they should be here now, are they not?"
the corner of your lips tugged downwards. it was embarrassing as it is, and now you had to tell him that they weren't coming. it's like a slap to the face, "um . . . they aren't coming. something came up, and i guess they couldn't come."
nanami's eyebrows twitched slightly, but he said nothing. his hand reached out for yours, giving it a slight squeeze, "spend the rest of your day with me?"
you blinked, "how about work?"
"don't worry about my work, you come first, understood?" he brushed his fingers through your hair, pulling you in for a brief kiss.
𝜗𝜚 . ITADORI YUUJI
maybe the fact that your parents were workaholics made you a better person. maybe the fact that your parents were workaholics pushed you to do better — like a cry for attention. but for some apparent reason, they never seemed to be satisfied with what you're doing.
"art brings you no good, what are you going to be? an artist? do you know how much they earn a year?"
don't be an artist this. don't be an artist that. it was pretty expected that your invitation for them was discarded with no thoughts behind. hell, they didn't even spare it a glance.
and yet, the little girl in you still hoped that they'd show up — even just for a while.
they didn't, it should be obvious. you saw it coming, but it still hurts anyways. however, itadori yuuji showed up; and he was like a ball of sunshine, so you couldn't help but to be happy as well. especially with how packed his schedule is, he still made the time to stop by.
"baby!"
"yuuji!"
he wrapped his arms around your waist and pulled you into a tight hug, carrying you around with ease, "sorry i came a little late, kugisaki needed me to bring her shopping bags back to the cab. where are your parents? they should be here, right?"
right. they should have.
"no, they didn't come," you murmured into the crook of his neck before pulling your head back with a sad smile plastered to your face, "but i'm okay, you're here now!"
yuuji puckered his lips out slightly, "i'm going to pester gojo-sensei to let me off for the rest of the day, i need to be here with you."
you shake your head, "you can't, what if you have a mission?"
"fushiguro can take over, pretty. don't worry about my missions," yuuji replied, nuzzling his nose to the side of your face, "plus, how can i leave you alone here, huh?"
"you're the sweetest, yuuji. but what if it's an important mission?" you pinched his cheeks gently, pulling them.
"fushiguro can take over, he's strong. and there's kugisaki, and the second year students. they'll manage," he retorted, pecking your cheek before letting you down.
"you're too nice, yuuji."
"i love you. and show me your works, i can't wait to see them, you know? kugisaki wanted pictures!"
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© churipu 2024 , do not copy or repost anywhere
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misc-obeyme · 20 hours
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cc. your tags on the boudoir post. MAMMON recieving an album of those photos. i'd love to hear your thoughts on his reaction (and everyone else's, if you're feeling particularly inspired?)
Ah, Daisy, my dear, thank you for asking!
I apologize for this late response, but I knew I was gonna be getting wordy with this one. Because I looove the boudoir photos idea in general and OH MAN just thinking about all their reactions is making me crazy lol. I was going to just do my regular sort of response, but this turned into full on headcanons oops.
So just in case anyone missed it, here is the original post!
My thoughts change a little bit depending on whether MC is present when the characters receive the pictures, so I included both! I only did the bros but I might be willing to do the rest upon request!
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the brothers react to MC giving them an album of boudoir photos
NSFW MDNI
Warnings: suggestive but that's about it, nothing explicit
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Lucifer
When you're with him, Lucifer is calm and courteous, but with a flare of arrogance. Of course you would give him such a special gift. It's only natural that you would trust such intimacies to him.
He asks you if you're trying to tell him something. Has he perhaps been neglecting you, MC? Did you give him this so that he wouldn't be able to help himself? He's onto you.
No matter your reason, he can't look through too many of the pictures before wanting the real thing that's sitting right next to him. Tell him you still have some of that lingerie in your possession. Especially if you happen to have some in his colors.
If you aren't with him, he's going to be a lot less arrogant in general. He will find you later, make no mistake. But he's honestly so touched by your gift that he spends a lot of time looking through the album, simply admiring you.
Mammon
Mammon is freaking out no matter where you are the time. If you're with him, it's definitely a lot worse. Blushing profusely. Opens the album then slams it shut because he can't handle looking at it for very long.
You can't help but giggle at his reaction and then it's all stop laughin' at him MC!! You'll need to take his hands or maybe kiss his cheek, let him know that you genuinely just wanted to give him a nice gift, you aren't trying to tease him or anything.
Ask him if he likes it. You'll get a serious response. Calms down enough to say 'course he likes it. Likes it so much, he suddenly can't keep his hands off you.
If you aren't with him at the time, he buries it under his pillow or otherwise hides it because this is now one of his treasures and nobody gets to see it but him!
Leviathan
Levi is another one who'd be a blushing mess no matter what, but if you're there at the time, he might retreat to his room and not let you in. He needs that barrier between you because if he sees you right now, his heart will explode.
He'll let you back in eventually, but it might be a minute. He needs to calm down. Are you trying to kill him, MC?! Even when he does let you in, he can't look at you directly. He's probably covering his face with his hands.
Reassure him that you gave these photos to him because you trust him with them. They're personal, intimate, and you want him to be close to you. He's going to calm down the more you talk to him. Pull his hands away from his face and when he sees the sincerity in your eyes, it flips a switch. Might even slip into demon form just to wrap his tail around you possessively.
If you're not with him at the time, he's going to need to take care of that raging boner of his right away. He won't be able to focus on anything else until he does. He's so embarrassed, he has to watch several episodes of Ruri Hana to recalibrate.
Satan
He will try to keep his expression unreadable. He's not having any over the top reactions, but as he flips through the photos, he keeps getting redder and redder. You're sitting right next to him, how can he not react? At some point, he has to close the album because he feels like he's looking at something he shouldn't.
Satan is quiet about how flustered he is, but he's having a hard time looking at you. He tries to say something and incomprehensible lines about how beautiful you are fall from his lips. He sounds like a broken record of spoken word poetry or perhaps a very drunk beat poet.
Recovers himself after a minute. As soon as he's composed, you're in his arms. You knew what this would do to him, didn't you, MC? You'll find yourself pressed up against the nearest wall in moments.
If you're not with him, Satan will tuck your album into a stack of his other books. He thinks it's well hidden there - in plain sight. But he's hyper aware of it. Keeps coming back to look at it. Ends up having to put it on the bottom of a stack behind a different stack to make it more difficult to get to.
Asmodeus
Thrilled. Absolutely thrilled in every way. Oh, wow, MC, you look amazing. He's breathless. He's entranced. He's even blushing because he knows what it means that you've given these to him. He's so in love with you, he can't stand it.
Asks you about everything you may be wearing. Comments on the skill of the photographer. Tells you that next time, you should do one together. He has so many ideas. He wants to do one where all you're wearing is jewelry - bright and sparkling, just like your soul.
Covers you in kisses. He's not shy about how this is making him feel, how much he wants you. He just wants to see your beautiful figure here and now in real life, MC! Won't you let him worship you?
If you're not with him, he will find you immediately so he can say all of the things he needs to say in that moment. You can't leave him alone with all these feelings, both physical and emotional. He brings them all to you without hesitating.
Beelzebub
It might take him a minute to understand exactly what he's looking at, mostly because he's never even heard of this. He doesn't know what a boudoir photo shoot is, so you might have to explain it to him. Once he understands, he starts lightly blushing as he looks through them. His expression is serious because he's beginning to see just how special this is.
Honestly surprised that you would give him something so intimate. He's touched. He's going to hug it to himself and look at you with tears in his eyes because he can't believe how lucky he is.
Give him another couple minutes to look through them and then he's having different feelings. He's not sure if he can hold back, MC. Tell him it's okay, that you don't want him to, and you'll find yourself on your back on his bed in zero seconds flat. You're quickly reminded why he's the Avatar of Gluttony.
If you're not with him at the time, he will figure things out on his own, though he'll have a plethora of questions for you later. He keeps it close to him at all times until you answer them because he knows one thing for sure - he doesn't want anyone else seeing these.
Belphegor
Oh, he sees what you're playing at. Trying to fluster him, are you, MC? Trying to rile him up? Are you sure you can handle him when you do that? He's so wound up by the gift he can't act normal about it. He's actually very touched by it, but he's not sure how to deal with the feelings, so he comes on too strong.
You laugh because to you, this is expected. You understand that this is Belphie's way of dealing with his own shyness. You respond by meeting him with just as much intensity. It's all kisses and touching and fumbling in the dark.
It's only later, when both of you are calm, when you're nestled in his arms, that he admits to you how much it means to him. That he tells you how he'll cherish the album you gave him. That he says he's stunned by how gorgeous you are, even more brilliant that the stars in the sky.
If you aren't with him at the time, you'll be dealing with a petulant but horny demon later on. He's going to be annoyed at you for leaving it for him and then not being there when it inevitably turns him on. Just as possessive as his brothers, he hides it in the attic where no one is likely to find it.
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masterlist | Thank you for reading!
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stxrvel · 3 days
Text
tis the damn season
a season of sadness wanted to come to an end. 'tis the damn season and you thought maybe you could go home and live with your mate the way it was meant to be…
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pairing: azriel x f!reader
wc: +3.5k
warnings: pure angst, cuss words and slight (or light? soft?) unprotected (wrap it up) smut. no happy ending, sorry
note: hi guys! :)- i wrote and published this one some time ago, but i deleted it because it was poorly received and that disappointed me a bit. but now that i was able to read it again, i feel it's a good job and that should be enough for me. i hope you guys like it :). see u next time!
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Azriel was your mate. You had known for a couple of months. He knew it long before that, too. The bond snapped first for him, but he never tried to get close to you. You didn't know if it was out of fear or if he never agreed with what was chosen for the two of you by the Cauldron. 
Likewise, you never had time to ask. The battle against the King of Hybern almost cost you your life. You didn't know what things had been done outside of your consciousness to keep you alive, you didn't know what boundaries Rhysand had crossed to bring you back to life, and you never wanted to ask either. You never asked anything, living in that ignorance gave you a sense of peace you didn't want to get rid of. 
But things were never the same after that. From the day you woke up, everything felt different. During that time, you didn't allow yourself much time to delve into what the recent bond between you and Azriel meant, and he always agreed to give you your time. 
However, one day, out of nowhere, it all became too overwhelming. And you decided to run away.
You never said anything to anyone, and you closed the door so Azriel couldn't feel you. You knew it must've been painful for everyone, especially your mate, but being with all of them after everything that had happened was unbearable. You lived under a constant reminder of suffering, violence and blood. You couldn't stop seeing your hands full of blood every time you closed your eyes, guilty for the lives they had taken as if you had had any right to do so, but having to know daily that it was all justified. Velaris and the permanence of the rest of Prythian justified it.
So, you went far away, to the other side of the world, to the east. To the Continent. 
And life was not easy at all. You knew Azriel wasn't having a good time. After a while, the wall you both had built around the bond was beginning to crack and his emotions were seeping through those tiny cracks. You could sometimes feel his sadness, his pain… his anger. After a couple of minutes of heartbreaking grief, the pangs of anger would appear. You could tell what he was going through and, selflessly, you tried to think that your decision was for the best. 
Rhysand wrote to you almost daily. Paper with his handwriting constantly appeared around you and, although you never answered him, he always made it a point to let you know everything that was going on in Velaris. 
The first few days were the hardest. 
There was a heavy snowfall on the Continent when you arrived, something that had never been more than a welcome, tearing at your skin. The cold was so deadly and the gales so lethal that you couldn't leave the apartment you were renting for a whole week. Apparently, at that time, that was normal. The cold that fogged up the windows, that froze your limbs, and that made all signs of life disappear. 
Where are you? Azriel is very worried
Please, answer me 
Y/N 
WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU???? 
Cassian and Azriel are flying over Velaris. Can you just tell me, please? 
Y/N, we are very worried. Please.
Please.
You had a lot of tugging on your bond from Azriel. You could feel his desperation even through the walls of silence. Those were difficult days. The cold days were not comforting at all. 
However, as the months passed, with the cultural difference and the harshness of reality outside of the family you had known for as long as you had memories, so many hundreds of years ago, you gave in to Rhysand's wishes to return to Velaris on the night of the Starfall.
And that night… well, you hadn't told anyone you were going. 
But as you expected, Azriel was the first to know you were there. 
You heard the flutter of his wings before you saw him, towering in the moonlight against the dim lighting in the city in anticipation of the biggest celebration of the year. He stumbled as he fell, being one of the few times you had seen him unable to control his strength, staggering with his feet and hands to get to a safe distance from you. His breathing was rapid, almost erratic and his eyes were bright, crystallized. The stirring movement in your chest brought tears to your eyes. 
Azriel was there in front of you from the moment he had the slight feeling, because he knew the bond wasn't wrong. And his gaze reflected everything. Everything he wanted to say and everything he preferred to keep silent. You had never felt so strongly the need to be close to him; you hadn't even accepted the bond, but you felt as if you had just done it. His eyes roamed the features of your face, his expression contracting as if he was slowly processing that you were really there in front of him. 
You saw him raise one of his hands, the hands that had so often held you in the darkness and through the sadness. If you focused really well, you could almost notice how his body trembled at the closeness, with anticipation, just as your body shuddered at his presence. 
The effects of the bond were powerful. But that hadn't been what made you fall in love with him. 
Azriel took a tentative step forward, reaching out his hands as if in a trance, seeking to touch you to make sure it was really you in front of him and not some kind of hallucination. Your voice stopped him on his feet. 
“Hello, Azriel,” you could barely speak, that suffocating feeling of being close tightening your throat. His eyes moved quickly back to yours and watered once more, his breathing quickening again. You didn't know what you had awakened in him just by speaking to him once more after so long without seeing him, but it must've been the same thing that ignited in your body when he spoke. 
“Y/N,” he elongated your name, like a plea or a prayer, you weren't sure. Electricity coursed through your body in a matter of seconds and you felt your feet move before you could stop them. The emotion rising in your chest matched your mate's expression, nostalgic because it had been so many months since you had last been so close and yet more pained and suffering because you had been the reason all that pain now surrounded you both. 
You stopped just inches away from him, your hands itching with the need to touch him, to feel him close, to once again have that warmth that would warm and thaw your soul. His huge, beautiful wings were taut behind him, being that all his attention was focused on your every move. You saw him hold his breath as you approached, struggling hard to hold back the tears that welled up in his eyes. 
“Are you okay?” you whispered the question, the air stealing your confidence, perhaps feeling a little silly and embarrassed about it. Suddenly, you felt too small under his gaze. 
“Okay?” the change in his voice was hardly imperceptible, sending shivers throughout your body, the panic of fear making its way into your chest, the bond tightening as if both ends were being pulled at the same time. “You left for a year without telling anyone. We went months without knowing if you were okay. I couldn't… I couldn't… feel you.” 
His voice became shaky, each word brimming with a tinge of suppressed anger. 
“Do you think I'm anything close to okay?” 
Yes, it was a stupid question. The knot in your chest grew rapidly, the back of your throat burning with pent-up tears. 
“I can't even enjoy the relief of seeing you now because… I'm so angry.” 
“I know…” you barely mumbled, lowering your head. How could you look him in the eye? Why did you think you had the right to go back as if nothing had happened? It was clear that things weren't going to be like they were before. You weren't sure about the others, but it seemed you had taken some of Azriel with you by disappearing like that. Proud you weren't of your actions, but you didn't know how to explain to his shattered features and cheeks wet with tears that, at that moment, you believed it was the right thing to do. 
The tears in his eyes prompted your own and you sobbed unable to contain the feeling. You tried to regain your composure, because you had no right to show such sadness when you had created it all. But Azriel was faster and you didn't even manage to put your hands under your eyes when his arms wrapped around your shoulders tightly. His wings also surrounded you and, although you had hardly noticed it because of the darkness, you felt his shadows dance around your feet. 
The warmth of his body was automatically welcome. How many times had you imagined that scene in your cold bed on the Continent, all alone and devastated from time to time, with memories invading your mind. Not many times did you regret your decision, except when you thought of Azriel. 
He sobbed too, his hands tightening on your arms, as if he was afraid to let you go again. He probably was. 
“I don't understand what made you think you'd be better off away from us… away from me, but I'm sorry.” 
His words surprised you, but a flood of feelings greeted you from the other end of the bond as Azriel let go and you couldn't think too hard. Crying swirled in the back of your throat. The level of pain and sadness that your mate was handling and had hidden from you for so long was so uncontainable that you almost doubled over, leaning over Azriel's body as you felt it rushing through you. 
“I thought you needed space. I know what happened with Hybern was too much for you and I didn't want to overwhelm you. But if I had known that decision would've made you decide you'd be better off away from me…” Azriel gulped, his voice full of feeling breaking off between words. “If I had known I promise you it would've been different.” 
You couldn't believe Azriel was telling you that. And the feelings coming from his end through the bond confirmed it to you. Azriel felt guilty about your departure. From moment one, when the panic and fear dissipated, Azriel never stopped feeling that it had been his responsibility that you decided to leave. And he couldn't have been more wrong. You loved him, had loved him long before the bond appeared, but the things that happened after Hybern, that affected you, had nothing to do with him. 
“Azriel…” 
“I'm supposed to be your mate. I'm supposed to support you, help you when you're down. I don't understand how I could fail at that. I'm sorry,” his voice was muffled as he spoke with his face hidden in your neck. At no time did he let go of you and his wings kept you warm. At that moment, that was home. 
“I promise it's not your fault,” you managed to speak, your face pressed against his chest. 
“I was supposed to be with you, accompanying you, but I-” 
“Azriel, you didn't do anything wrong,” you fought against his tight grip so you could look him in the eyes and the tears running down his cheeks broke your heart once again. 
“Then why did you leave?” 
You didn't have an answer for that and Azriel realized it when your lips pursed. He sighed, as best he could, and drew you back into his arms. Maybe he didn't need an answer at that moment, just having you by his side was more than enough. 
With the others it wasn't much easier. 
Rhysand and Feyre almost wept at your feet. Cassian, on the other hand, didn't hide it and deliberately filled your shoulder with tears and saliva. Mor lifted you into the air and almost didn't let you escape when Azriel started begging her to let you go already. Everyone cried. Possibly even Feyre's sisters shed a tear or two. 
You felt calm for a while. Complete, as if you were back in that house, in that home, before Amarantha and Hybern destroyed everything for you. 
But things couldn't be perfect. After the Starfall, you began to feel that anxiety again. Azriel could only tell by your body language, because you still kept your end of the bond completely closed to him and he couldn't feel the swirl of emotions coursing through your body. You had barely had time to get used to the familiarity of the situation when all the memories came flooding back. Perhaps you had blocked them out during your absence living on the Continent, you weren't sure, but the cries of war began to haunt you from the back of your mind. 
Azriel's shadows were also restless and that was another way he could tell something was going on. He was almost glued to your side all night, watching you out of the corner of his eye when you stepped away to talk to some friends. He never let you out of his sight. You knew where this behavior was coming from, but it never occurred to you to comment on it at any time. 
So, by that time, Azriel knew what was going on and you were sure you couldn't escape him. When he approached you and extended his hand in silent invitation, with the sound of conversations and drinks in the back of your head, you almost didn't hesitate to take it. His darkness enveloped you and, within seconds, you appeared in your room at the Town House. The party was now an imperceptible murmur. 
“Would you like to rest?” Azriel spoke, after spending several seconds standing facing each other. One of his hands ran over your face barely perfunctorily, but the warm sensation ignited too many things in your body. He arranged the strands of your hair that hid your face behind your ears with delicate, almost invisible movements. 
You only moved your head in response, up and down, under his watchful gaze. 
He almost crawled away, moving to your old bed that didn't have the same sheets as when you left. In fact, when you took a quick glance around the room, it looked too neat considering the amount of time that, presumably, no one used it. 
You shrunk at the thought of Azriel coming in regularly to clean it. 
With crystallized eyes you watched him move the comforter to make way for the clean white sheets waiting to be used once again after so long. 
Azriel turned to look at you, expectant. You didn't know if he was waiting for you to move to lie down or to ask him to leave so you could change into comfortable pajamas, but you did neither. Not when the emotions in your chest moved you, when they were more uncontainable now that you shared your mate's. Not when he opened up to you in such a vulnerable way, when he let you know that which for so long he kept to himself. Not when he gave you to understand that he was always waiting for you, even though it hurt him terribly that you had decided to spend all that time alone. 
So, for some reason, whether it was feelings or rationality, you approached him. You let yourself be carried away by nostalgia, by the silent desires of your heart, and you approached your mate with long strides. 
His expression went from neutral to confused as you got closer and you only remembered seeing it turn to surprise when you cradled his face in your hands and kissed him. 
It was rough and awkward at first, because your mate was completely transfixed for a few seconds. Maybe out of anxiety you counted ten. But, whether he was born from the same place as you or not, Azriel melted under your touch and as soon as he came to his senses he was kissing you back. It was just the kiss of an unaccepted bond, of a separated couple who held too many melancholy memories in their chests to bear on their own. 
Azriel wrapped his strong arms around your waist and bent his head to kiss you more deeply. You could feel the desperation and desire hovering tentatively in his demeanor, but he held back to give you a sweet, soft kiss; a kiss that said welcome, a kiss that urged you to stay by your side and never be separated from him again, a kiss that made you wonder why you had left in the first place. 
The softness of his movements were a direct contrast to your own. You cradled his face tightly, moving your lips over his as if second nature. Then you circled his neck, pressing him against you as if somehow you could hold him that much closer. You wanted him closer. 
But Azriel broke away, breathing in and out between gasps, and looked up at you with dark, glowing eyes. 
“Do you want this?” 
His hands on your skin burned. 
“Yes,” you answered quickly and tried to move closer again to kiss him, but he broke away again. 
“And are you going to stay after this?” 
Your eyes met his worried expression, thinly disguised. Ever since he'd opened his end of the bond for you, shedding any obstacle on his part that wouldn't allow him to feel you, everything you'd seen from him had been genuine. So you knew that concern was genuine and the mere conception generated pain in your heart. 
“I will stay,” you assured him, forcing your lips into a tight smile. 
Azriel studied your face trying to convince himself of your words, for he was an expert at knowing your body language, and you had no idea what he saw that convinced him and led him to pounce on your mouth once more. 
When the lightness settled into the bond, you were thankful you had never lowered your wall. Guilt suffocated you. 
But you kissed him back and followed your heart's desires, if only for one night. 
Azriel moved his hands along every curve of your body before removing your dress. If you hadn't stopped his movements, he would've surely ripped it off. His eyes followed every part his hands had explored and then his lips were on every inch of skin. Against the soft mattress and with your wrists held by his hands, you could only sigh and moan slightly at the way he explored your body. And yes, Azriel took his time. 
Before long there wasn't a single cloth separating the two of you and your mate simply couldn't keep his hands and lips still. Not that he wanted to, either. You moved your hands along his back, trying to avoid his wings, and moving your lips down his neck when he would let you because it seemed like all he wanted to do was eat you up with kisses. 
It wasn't long before he had you panting against him, with the sound of bodies colliding being the only thing your head could process at that moment. The tingling that coursed through your body was like no other you had ever felt; the wonders Azriel was doing with your body were unparalleled. He was panting too and every time he met your eyes it seemed to you that they were darker than the last time, but he never stopped holding you at any moment, never stopped hugging you as if his whole life depended on it. Maybe it did. 
The feel of his body against yours was indescribable, the movement and rhythm almost unbearable. You had never felt pleasure even remotely close to what he was making you feel at that moment. 
“Azriel…” you moaned his name, gripping his shoulders tightly, burying your nails as if it were your only stability. 
He cursed between gasps, increasing the pace and the force with which he held your waist. 
You were never going to get to touch the sky like you did that night, that much was clear. Even though your head was split in two, you looked into his eyes as you went through the most shattering, sweeping orgasm you'd ever had, reveling in the sounds that came from his mouth as he followed you to paradise. 
You thought it was going to be hard afterwards, but you fell asleep almost instantly. 
When you opened your eyes again, your mate's arms and legs were wrapped around your body and one of his wings was covering your nakedness and keeping you warm. You were facing him, chest to chest, and just looking at his peaceful sleeping face made you want to cry. Life was here, next to him, why couldn't you accept that? 
Getting out of bed without waking him up was quite a battle. Not as much as it was to sit at the foot of the bed, watching him rest, completely unaware of what would await him when he woke up. This time you were being selfish, you knew it, it was too cruel. But in your head there was nothing but disaster, pain disguised as stability. You couldn't have a good life with Azriel now and you didn't know if you could bear to see him to tell him after you promised to stay. You shouldn't have told him that, but how could you tell him otherwise? Maybe if he woke up at that moment you would stay… maybe that's why you sat there for so long. 
But finally you left, just like last time, in the middle of the silence, with his shadows following your feet and trying to keep you company. You felt a deja-vu as you stood in front of the door, thinking about how on both occasions you were thinking about what would happen if someone showed up to stop you. 
It didn't, in either case, and you knew the next day the exact moment when Azriel realized you had done it once again. He didn't try to hide his pain, he didn't have to, you deserved to know how you had made him feel. 
On the ship, on the way to the Continent, you fell to your knees as his pain stole your breath. 
147 notes · View notes
milf-murdock · 21 hours
Note
Hi!! I love love love your writing! Especially your 141!Reader series <3 I don't know if you take requests, but your last post about Simon and baby Joseph made me so angsty and I would love to read more angst from you. Could you please write about Simon thinking 141!Reader was KIA on a mission? Thank you!!!
Anon....who....who hurt you???? I’m kidding 😆 mostly 👀 But for real, this one HURT. Like. OUCH. This man has been through so fucking much…but let’s put him through a bit more 😈😈😈 also, I did very much hurt my own feelings with this one. So I’m thinking we might need a part two reunion because I don’t know if I can leave our Ghosty boy in shambles like this
Drip. Drip. Drip. 
The rain patters against the window in a steady rhythm.
Simon watches the fat raindrops roll down the small window pane, one foot anxiously tapping against the concrete floor. He didn’t know why he was called to Price’s office, but there was an ominous charge to the air. Call it a premonition, or maybe an instinct, but he knew in his bones that something was wrong. 
The click of the door handle pulls Simon from his thoughts as Price enters the office, a heavy silence filling the air. 
“What’s happened?” Simon's voice has a hard edge to it, cutting straight through the bullshit. Watchful eyes appraise every detail of Price’s body language, and Simon notes the deep sunken look of his captain’s eyes accentuated by a somber expression. 
Price avoids Simon's gaze, staring down at the oak desktop before him as he takes a seat. The captain wasn’t one to mince words or beat around the bush, but even he was having a hard time wrapping his mind around the situation despite his many years in the service.  
Simon's heart hammers in his chest, every second in the unknown feeling like an eternity. This isn’t right, he thinks to himself. 
Price steels himself with a deep inhale, pulling his gaze from the desk to face Simon head on, looking past the mask, speaking to the man he knew laid beneath. 
“I wanted you to hear this from me, son. You…deserve to hear this from me.” 
Simon stops breathing. 
With practiced determination, Price continues his speech, having rehearsed the words in his head the entire walk down to his office. 
“Reconnaissance mission, Operation Blackout, suffered multiple casualties after a long-range detonation by enemy action. There’s been no contact with the team, and rescue attempts were unsuccessful due to the extensive damage caused by the explosion. All team members are presumed KIA. The official course of action…”
The rest of Price’s speech is drowned out by the dull roar in Simon’s ears; his blood runs cold, his rigid body barely breathing. 
This can’t be happening. Not again. Never again. 
Simon's thoughts grip him by the heart, squeezing painfully. 
I can’t do this again.
He had already lost everyone once. Had built impenetrable walls, designed to protect him from this type of pain. 
But you. You and your goddamn charm, and your soft smiles, and your relentless fucking attitude. You broke down those walls brick by brick, made Ghost–no, made Simon– feel more like a man than he had in years. You slipped past his ironclad defenses and took his heart without him even realizing it. 
And just when he had finally opened up, just when he had finally convinced himself that maybe he could be happy–that you could be happy together. It all came crashing down. 
In the distance, Ghost could hear shouting. A chorus of denials piercing the air, heavy ragged breaths filling the silence between. 
A heavy hand fell on Ghost's shoulder and he found himself back in his body, looking up at Price, voice raw. 
With a stark realization, Ghost realizes it was him. He was the one shouting, the one gasping for breath. 
The world tilted out from under him. 
____________ 
Ghost left Price’s office a different man–a mere shell of the man who entered. With every step he took, he felt himself slipping further and further into the familiar safety of Ghost, an unpierceable facade moving through the world. 
Everything felt wrong. Every step. Every breath. He felt like he was moving underwater, every action taking twice the effort it should. 
The next few hours pass in a blur. The official order that he was being sent on leave. The ensuing argument with Price over the orders. He eventually just gave up. Leave, no leave, it didn’t fucking matter. 
None of it fucking matters. 
Johnny tries to see him before he leaves, meeting Simon on the tarmac. He tries to be there for his lieutenant, his friend. 
The red rim around Johnny’s eyes reminds Simon that he wasn’t the only one who had lost you. They had all lost you. But even that which should have been a comfort, a sort of kinship in the grief, meant nothing. Simon didn’t give a singular fuck. He turned away from Johnny mid-speech, leaving the Scotsman to sit in his grief alone as he watched Ghost disappear into the aircraft. 
____________ 
It takes every ounce of strength Ghost has to make it through the flight. To make it through the drive back home. To make it through that door. 
Keep it together, soldier. Don’t you dare fucking lose it, Simon Riley. Just a bit longer. 
His belongings crash to the floor as the door slams shut behind him. He doesn’t even bother turning on the light, instead using the faint glow of the moonlight through the curtains to guide him to the cabinet. 
Ghost pulls the bottle of bourbon from its resting spot, not even bothering with a glass as he pulls off the corked top and takes a hearty swig. 
The burn of the liquid is invigorating, filling Ghost with a quiet simmering fire. 
He takes another drink. And another. 
He walks through the flat in a daze, the amber liquid dulling his senses, sending him even deeper into the haze of his grief. 
Ghost finds himself in front of his dresser, staring at the wooden drawers. 
Taking another drink, he steels himself as he yanks open the top drawer. Rummaging beneath the pile of socks and t-shirts, Ghost digs out the small velvet box. He grips it tight in his hand, the small object groaning in protest as waves of rage and pain overtake Ghost, threatening to pull him under. Hot tears slide down his face, but he doesn’t even notice. 
With a roar he throws the velvet box across the room, the impact fracturing the drywall. Ghost’s knees go out from under him and he crashes to the floor, his heart shattering into a thousand pieces. There would be no repairing this. No amount of time could heal this type of heartbreak. 
You were dead. 
And as far as Ghost was concerned, Simon Riley died with you. 
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little-sleepy-owl · 2 days
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𝐀𝐥𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐫 𝐱 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫,
who is a virgin and wants him to be their first. gender neutral, not so much explicit, but still smutty, as usual. Alastor is his own warning. kinda.
this one took me a while for several reasons. mostly because life is a bitch, but also because it was a really hard piece to write. I'm asexual myself and this is heavily self-indulgent. I wanted to maintain this treat of his, but still explore the sexual aspect of the relationship and the way asexual people might participate in it. so... yeah. proceed with understanding of this.
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oh? so, you're just like him.
the only one who is not surprised whatsoever. isn't it supposed to be that way?
though there are a lot of vulgar people around. he might even praise you for keeping your chastity for so long.
but… becoming your first?
“Truly, my dear? That's quite the favor to ask a gentleman!”
it's less about being repulsed by the idea of intimacy (it doesn't sound bad if it's with you) and more about not wanting to step into a completely uncharted territory.
that's a first for him too, after all.
give him time. he needs to research some things before he's ready to try.
a week or two later he suddenly appears out of the shadows in your room with loud static noises, scaring the shit out of you, and announces that he would be very pleased to take the offer!!
hooray..? (please come out from under the bed, darling.)
now, just like Husk, he is an old-fashioned man. for him, this could only happen after a nice date.
he prefers a simple stroll around the city arm in arm, and having some coffee with you.
you can sense that he's a tad nervous, but also deeply thrilled. his posture is a little stiff while walking, ears, usually unmoving, twitch slightly here and there. it's cute.
you also notice he's more physically intimate with you today than usual. sitting a bit closer to you and leaning in subtly, so you can feel his warmth. gently covering your hand with his own. reaching to fix your hair, touch feather-like and making your heart pound in your chest.
none of it is sexual in any way, but the difference in his demeanor doesn't let you forget your plans for the night even for a moment.
judging by the sly curve of his smile and very attentive gaze, this is one hundred percent intentional.
inclined to take you into his own room after the date. if you're not against the living forest in the background.
(I suggest you accept the offer. fireflies would be a very romantic addition to your night.)
he needs to talk things out first.
“Let's discuss some rules of our… little arrangement.”
the rules are quite simple, although you might find them odd.
he will not take all his clothes off. especially not the lower part. pants stay on no matter what.
his hands, his mouth? all for your pleasure, darling. no limitations here.
and maybe, if you behave yourself and ask nicely… his shadows, too, can participate.
he merrily refuses to elaborate on what “behaving” means for him exactly. it's simply more fun that way, isn't it?
jacket tossed inside, sleeves rolled up. honestly speaking, it already feels too revealing. you don't think you ever saw so much of his arms or his neck before.
he is in a white shirt today, clean and pure, like the snow on the mountaintop. pristine even.
you never saw this, either.
he follows your gaze and his smile turns a little unsettling. you shiver, suddenly feeling like you are the one who's exposed here, even though you haven't taken off anything yet.
“No blood to stain it today, my dear,” he coos, adjusting the shirt slightly. oh, so usually he wears red for–
you don't want to continue this thought right now.
he's very insistent on undressing you by himself.
he uncovers you like you're his birthday cake in a cute present box. slowly removing every ribbon, carefully taking off the wrapping, anticipating what's underneath.
his hands are cold, but his eyes are heated, even somewhat hungry. and so, so intent.
he drinks on your every shiver, on the way your lips parts ever so slightly to let out a small gasp, on the goosebumps that run on your skin, when he leans in to nibble on your pretty neck, right beside the quicked throbbing of your pulse.
he hums an old tune, seemingly lost in exploration of your body and the way you respond to his touch.
he's eager to learn and very observant. he changes the pace the moment he notices you feeling uncomfortable. he discovers what makes you respond well and uses the knowledge without any shame.
but he also does very much love you telling him what you want him to do with that cute trembling voice of yours.
that's what eventually earns you the shadows taking part in the whole fun. if this is something you desire.
if you weren't satisfied before, you most certainly are now.
expect him to restrain you. he likes to see you squirming under his touch, unable to set the pace. he does everything deliberately slow, so you would beg him to give you more and do it faster.
he's very controlling in general, and although he takes into account what you want, he will also act on his own whim.
it honestly seems that he likes teasing and tormenting you to see your reactions much more than the physical aspect of it all.
humor him, and he will reward you accordingly.
but don't let him get too lost in it. he has a tendency to forget that you're not merely a toy to play with.
set some boundaries and you'll be alright.
once you both decide it's enough, he's a thoughtful gentleman again, bringing a glass of water for you, and helping you clean yourself up.
will let you rest your head on his lap, gentle light of fireflies surrounding you.
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he sings a shooting melody, letting you peacefully drift off to sleep.
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fearful-quartet · 2 days
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So I've been listening to The Magnus Protocol, and managed to get my dad into TMA last year so he's now listening to Mag Protocol too. So last night we were listening in the car to the latest statement, and I was half-jokingly saying which fear the statement sounded like mostly, to which my dad starts talking about how he doesn't think these statements and the O.A.I.R are connected to the Fears at all. I'm gonna try to put a cut for anyone not caught up but here's how this led to a theory of mine:
So Lena said to Gwen that there's good and bad forces that need to be balanced, but she never said which side of that the O.A.I.R. is part of, if any. I was noting this when it hit me.
Every single Magnus Protocol Statement so far has been about misfortune coming around due to perceived fortune or a fortunate opportunity becoming misfortune.
Let's break this down ep by ep so you see what I mean.
Episode One: It's a little hard to figure out what the fortune is to the misfortune, especially since it's mostly getting us used to the characters and the overall setup of the show, but for the first statement I think it's not the statement giver, but the husband. Harriet (the one emailing) says he sounded excited in an unsettling way (I am assuming the "he" she is talking about is her husband since she doesn't mention anyone else). When she meets him, or what has him, she describes that he laughed and laughed. Her misfortune was his fortune, his joy.
The second statement in that episode of course is about the Institute, but by way of a bunch of spelunkers looking for something intriguing to discuss. I haven't quite figured out the connection here but I am sure there is one, even if it's through the characters (aka Sam) finding something within it.
Two: A lot easier to connect to this. Daria is finding joy through getting this tattoo that allows her to change how she looks and alter her appearance immensely (and grotesquely). Enough said.
Three: This statement is one that overall I just don't understand tbh, but I think it shows the opposite? As in the victim is experiencing fear and discomfort the entire time, but towards the end you'll notice he gets much more happy and calm about the situation.
Four: This is again easy, it's about a violin that needs blood but will give you amazing talent if you pay that price, and horrible bloodshed if you don't. Self-explanatory.
Five: The guy is trying to make a living off watching and reviewing horror movies, gets excited at a live showing of one just for him, then realizes it's not what it seems and posts everyone should see it. Easy enough. (Very Grifter's Bone in energy)
Six: The introduction to infamous new tumblr sexyman, Needles. I shouldn't have to spell out how he gets pleasure from others in pain by needles.
Seven: All I gotta say is it's "all for a good cause" and you should get the picture.
Eight: Utilizes that uncanny fear of false hospitality if you ask me, but either way this statement is clearly taking something associated often as comforting and twisting it.
Nine: The dice literally affect fortune and misfortune and likely make the statement giver into the embodiment of fortune. 'Nuff said.
Ten: Bonzo needs no explanation for this in his introductory episode so let's move on.
Eleven: This one goes more into obsession territory than anything, which is another running theme of the show and another theory, but it also talks about how the sea brings comfort so that could be part of it. (Also I noticed the sneaky possibly Dr. David reference in there lol)
Twelve: Now I know what you're gonna say, "How is this one connected to fortune at all, Cal? It's about some woman being traumatized at a strip club!" Well think about this: what if it wasn't supposed to end in Bonzo? Gwen gave Bonzo an "assignment," didn't she? And Lena pretty much outright says that this statement was that assignment. So it's possible this is what happened after stopping the initial outcome.
Thirteen: The latest episode as of typing this, and the most clear with evidence. The man literally gains a fortune from his own misfortune, so ya know it's right there.
So every statement is a good thing turned bad or a bad thing turned good. So what? Magnus Archives had plenty of statements similarly framed, so why am I focusing on it here?
Because what is the tagline for Magnus Protocol again?
Fear takes many forms.
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megalony · 7 hours
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Baby-Trapped - Part 3
Here is the latest part in my Evan Buckley series, thank you all for the amazing feedback and the ideas which have helped me keep going with this series so thank you.
Feel free to send in any more ideas and let me know what you think.
Taglist: @justagirlthatlovedtoread @musicistheway @avada-kedavra-bitch-187 @luula @missdreamofendless @bradleybeachbabe @woderfulkawaii @amberpanda99 @daggersquadphantom @marvel-and-chicago-fan @angryknightstatesmantrash @minjix @lyjen @kmc1989 @itsmytimetoodream @noonenuts @hiireadstuff @ashie-babie @classyunknownlover @jayyeahthatsme @sp1ritssz @dumb-fawkin-bitch @oliverstarksbae @gimatida @heart-35 @supernaturalstilinski @stefansalvatoresgf @kyky9103 @wutheringhearts2275 @gay4hotmilfs @itshamleth @chaoticnosleepinfluencer @gs29 @wh0reforsmutstuff @mel-vaz @natashamea18 @chrisevansdaughter @alexandra8484 @deena-beena-weena @targaryenluvs @shelbygeek @kpoplover-19 @marvelmenarebeautiful @gillybear17
@zoeybennett @mrspeacem1nusone
Evan Buckley Masterlist
Series Masterlist
Summary: (Y/n) distances herself from Evan when the people at her college believe he shouldn't be with someone younger and inexperienced like her. But things change when she falls pregnant.
Enjoy.
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"I do believe that's mine." Folding his arms over his chest, Evan grinned and crossed one leg in front of the other as he leant against the wall.
His eyes drifted up and down (Y/n)'s frame a few times and he felt his heart jumping in his chest when she tilted her head back and looked over her shoulder at him with wide eyes. He loved the way her lips parted in surprise and she froze, caught red handed.
(Y/n) turned away from the mirror in the corner of the room and looked across at Evan like a deer caught in the headlights. But the way he smiled at her and didn't hide the lust in his eyes made adrenaline pool in her stomach.
She glanced down and looked up and down her attire which Evan was referring to.
She was wearing his shirt.
It took a few seconds for (Y/n) to tear her gaze away from Evan who looked so casual leant up against the wall. His short-sleeved shirt showing off the tattoos littering his biceps which were tense and taut. And his work shirt clung to his chest and showed off every ridge and crevace.
Turning her head, (Y/n) looked back at the reflection staring at her in the mirror. She was wearing a pair of black leggings and Evan's white button up shirt with vertical beige stripes all over. The shirt hung limply off her shoulders and hung down near her knees due to the height difference between the couple, but Evan would admit she looked great in his clothes.
"Why're you stealing my stuff, hm?" Pushing off the wall, Evan padded across the carpet until he was stood behind (Y/n).
He looped both arms around her neck and leaned down to kiss the top of her head while (Y/n) gave his forearm a squeeze.
Evan loved her wearing his clothes. He thought she looked amazing in any of his things. Especially his shirts that she went to sleep in or his hoodies when she was cold. But she was going to class now. Evan wasn't used to seeing (Y/n) go to college wearing his clothes. She usually wore his stuff when they were lounging about at home or when she wanted to wind Evan up.
"I thought it might help… but I don't think I can pass unnoticed anymore." (Y/n) trailed her hands down from Evan's arms to cup her stomach wistfully.
She hoped wearing something of Evan's might do her image a little good. That because his clothes were always baggy on her, (Y/n) could get away with another week or two of going to class and not showing that she was pregnant.
Not that it really mattered either way because Sandra had told the entire campus and (Y/n) had to tell their class teacher, just to be safe in case anything happened. Everyone in their class knew the rumours and (Y/n) wasn't embarrassed, but she liked sitting in class and not having a reason for people to stare.
When she started to show, people were going to stare and (Y/n) hated being the centre of attention. Unless it was Evan's attention she was getting.
"Good."
A gentle smile pulled at (Y/n)'s lips when Evan loosened his arms from around her waist and moved his hands down to her stomach. And she tilted her head back into his chest and giggled softly when he raked her shirt up and bunched it just below her bra so he could see her stomach.
His fingertips tickled her skin as he moved his palms to cup her stomach and started to draw patterns into her stomach.
They were just about twenty weeks along now and (Y/n) was properly beginning to show.
Evan was infatuated.
He loved the new shape of her stomach and the fact that her shape proved they were going to have a baby. He was bouncing off the walls, waiting to feel the baby move and start to feel them kicking.
"I wanna see our baby and show them off." Evan tilted his head to the right and attached his lips to (Y/n)'s neck which made a shiver course down her spine.
He grinned against her skin and dragged his teeth along her neck when (Y/n) kissed his temple. And he felt her hands move down to cup his wrists as she leaned back into him. This was what made it worth it. (Y/n) knew she would be able to handle the stares at college and any remarks people threw at her. Because at the end of the day, she was coming home to Evan and they were both desperate to have this baby. That was all that mattered.
"Babe?"
"Hm?" Evan opened his eyes enough to lock gazes with (Y/n) in the mirror so she knew he was listening. Before he closed his eyes again and went back to biting her neck.
"I think we can find out the gender today… what do you want me to do? Should I wait?"
(Y/n) almost felt bad when Evan groaned into her neck and pulled her back into his chest with his palms flat against her stomach. He was on shift today until late tonight and he couldn't get a shift swap so he could go along to the scan today.
The only bright side Evan had was this wasn't (Y/n)'s first scan. He had been to her first two scans with her and had heard the baby's heartbeat for the first time. Missing this scan was going to grate on his nerves and play on his mind, but it wasn't as bad as not being there for the first one or being there if (Y/n) was unwell.
But (Y/n) knew they would be able to find out the gender today and they had both agreed that they wanted to know before the birth. If Evan wasn't going to be there with her, (Y/n) wanted to know if she should wait until he was at their next scan to find out.
"I could surprise you, do a gender reveal just for you, if you like."
(Y/n) knew the moment Evan grinned into her neck that he liked the sound of that. And she felt his tongue dart across the mark he'd just bitten into her neck, soothing the slight burn he'd created beneath her skin.
She could find out the gender today and get something to do a little gender surprise for Evan. They had already said they didn't want a gender reveal party or anything like that. (Y/n) didn't even want a baby shower. They would tell the station and their family the gender when they found out, but it wasn't going to be a special occasion or anything like that.
"Okay baby, you surprise me." Evan moved one hand to cup the side of (Y/n)'s face and he tilted her head in his direction to get a kiss.
His tongue swiped at her lower lip, begging for entrance while his right hand started tracing letters and aimless swirls across (Y/n)'s stomach until she was squirming against him.
"Are we going now, then?" (Y/n) kissed him again and sucked on his lower lip before she pulled out of his arms and rolled his shirt back down over her stomach.
But her eyes rolled and she huffed when Evan leaned down and yanked the shirt back up again and pulled her closer by her hips. Her hands fell to his shoulders and she could of swooned, feeling her knees buckling when Evan leaned down and attached his lips to her stomach.
"We'll be late." Her fingers dragged through Evan's hair and she ruffled his curls, brushing them back on his head.
(Y/n) knew by now that it was pointless to tell Evan he didn't have to drop her off at college. He wanted to and (Y/n) loved the fact that he wanted to take her and pick her up and look after her. And it was easier than walking down there and working up a sweat. And morning sickness didn't combine well with a long walk from home down to college since (Y/n) was now officially moved in with Evan.
"Remember Maddie's picking you up later." Evan straightened up and pecked her temple while he curved his arm around her waist and walked behind her towards the stairs.
"Babe I can get the bus to the hospital, it's only ten minutes away." Evan dropping her anywhere was different, but (Y/n) didn't want to start bothering anyone else. And she didn't want Maddie to feel obligated or like she had to take her anywhere.
"No, Maddie's taking you. She's excited."
(Y/n) nodded and rolled the shirt back down, again, and smoothed it out around her thighs as they headed downstairs. She wouldn't refuse a lift if Maddie was happy and willing to take her, as long as she wasn't putting Maddie out of her way or ruining her day.
And it would be good to have some company at her scan, (Y/n) didn't want to go to that alone.
***
Closing her eyes, (Y/n) looped her bag higher on her shoulder and pushed ahead out the classroom door.
She was never usually the first to leave but today, (Y/n) didn't care. She wanted to go. She was a mixture of bundled nerves of excitement and panicked nerves that people were looking at her.
Arriving on campus had felt fine, it had felt great in fact, because Evan had dropped her off and he had put up a fight to get her to stay in the car and give him 'just one more kiss'. He boosted her spirits and as she left the car, (Y/n) could still feel his fingertips touching all over her stomach and she could hear his voice in her ear telling her she looked great. She looked sexy. Pregnant was a good look on her. He was addicted to her.
His words made (Y/n) feel elated and she made it to class feeling happy with herself and how she looked.
Sitting with Tina through both classes had been fine right up until (Y/n) could see Sandra aiming for them.
She didn't want to hang around and hear whatever slurrs or insults she decided to throw at her today. (Y/n) made sure she was the first out the classroom so she could leave campus before anyone tried to talk to her or Sandra tried to insult her.
Her eyes dithered between the hall and the corridor on her left and after a split second, (Y/n) turned left and sprinted to the girl's toilets.
It was a relief that the toilets were empty.
(Y/n) slumped her bag down on the cubicle floor, kicked the door shut behind her and crouched down just in time to throw up her lunch. It would be best not to tell Evan she had thrown up again when she next spoke to him. He wouldn't be pleased and he would start to worry. (Y/n) didn't want to worry him while he was on shift.
She would make sure she ate something substantial for tea and had some fruit and sugar to boost her system.
A groan tumbled past her lips and her knees shook as she slowly tried to push herself back up when she was done throwing up. She wiped the sweat from her forehead and rummaged around in her bag for the chewing gum she stole from Evan for this very reason.
Leaning her back up against the cubicle, (Y/n) chewed the gum and sighed quietly to herself.
Her hands moved down to cup her stomach and she glared down as if she could see through her stomach to the baby that was making her body this disorientated. But as (Y/n) danced her hands around her small bump, she huffed and dropped her arms down. It didn't feel the same as when Evan touched her stomach. It didn't feel as good.
She put the gum in the bin and hooked her bag over her shoulder but when she walked out the cubicle, she gasped and stumbled on her back foot.
Carla.
One of Sandra's cronies was leaning against the cubicle wall with her hands clasped behind her back and a sickly sweet smile on her face. She wasn't as bad as Sandra, but (Y/n) didn't get along with any of their little cliché. Carla was nosey, she was the one going round telling everyone that (Y/n) was dating an older man
"Are you okay?"
"I'm fine." Bypassing Carla, (Y/n) quickly washed her hands and moved towards the door. She wasn't hanging around for an insult.
"So it's true then. Should I say congratulations?"
Carla caught the door before it slammed in her face and she hurried to keep up the pace with (Y/n) who stormed down the hall. She wanted to leave. She had to hurry up and see if Maddie was outside so they could get to the appointment on time. (Y/n) was tempted to just run straight to the bus stop and be done with everyone here if it would get her out of this conversation any quicker.
"Does your fireman know yet? Must be a shock, being tied down to you-"
"I think my fella knows by now, don't you?" Stopping in her tracks, (Y/n) turned to the left and looked at Carla with raised brows. She moved her hands down and cupped her stomach, pressing Evan's shirt down into her waist so her bump was evident.
Evan would have to be pretty distant, clueless or pain silly if he didn't know by now that (Y/n) was pregnant. Not that it was anyone's business but theirs, but (Y/n) was tired. She was tired of the questions and the looks and the petty remarks.
No more loose clothes. No more worrying. They can all see what they like.
If they were all so interested, (Y/n) would revert back to wearing her clothes and only wear Evan's clothes when she had nothing else that fit or when she wanted to tease him in the bedroom. She would come to class in her tight, stretchy tops that showed off her stomach. She would wear her jeans and smile when they didn't zip up over her bump anymore.
She wouldn't look or panic if the girls could see Evan dropping her off at college. And she would smile and feel her heart ignite when he attached himself to her and whisper how sexy he thought she looked.
If they were this interested, (Y/n) would let them all stare. It would be better and much easier than trying to explain herself when she didn't have to.
This was her baby and she was happy to be having Evan's baby, there was no reason for (Y/n) to feel worried or embarrassed about what people would say.
"Go bother someone else Carla, I'm busy." With that being said, (Y/n) pushed ahead and hurried out the doors onto campus.
She wasn't sure what type of car she was supposed to be looking for. Evan neglected to mention what car his sister drove and (Y/n) suddenly felt too awkward to try and ring Maddie and ask if she was here and what car to look out for. But her panic was all for nothing when she got towards the drop off lane just outside the campus.
(Y/n) could easily see a familiar face grinning through the window and a hand waving and beckoning her over. Problem solved.
Hurrying over, (Y/n) opened the door and slid down into the passenger seat. It was a change to have to lean down to get into Maddie's car rather than how she had to hike up to get into Evan's jeep.
Evan had started joking that in another two months or less, he was going to have to start lifting (Y/n) in and out of the jeep.
She hoped that wasn't going to be the case.
"Hi." (Y/n) smiled softly and placed her bag down in between her feet, forcing herself not to look out the window in case any of the girls were looking. She wouldn't give them the satisfaction of knowing they were upsetting her. They couldn't bring down (Y/n)'s mood. Not today.
"Hey, are we ready?" Maddie reached across and gave (Y/n)'s thigh a squeeze before she pulled away from the curb.
Her smile was enough to brighten (Y/n)'s mood and make her feel more at ease and comfortable. She had been surprised how quickly Maddie had taken to her and accepted her as a sister. (Y/n) thought it would of been harder than this to win her over, knowing how close she and Evan were.
"You didn't have to do this, you know." (Y/n)'s voice was soft and quiet as she looked across at Maddie.
She wanted her to know she was grateful for the lift, she wasn't taking this for granted. (Y/n) didn't expect Maddie to take her anywhere, she wasn't used to having siblings or a close family connection like Evan had with his team. It was strange, but it was also lovely to meet people and find she could talk to them and maybe even rely on them.
"I told Buck I'd be happy to drop you off or pick you up. Besides, we're not having you walk all that way to the doctors, we need to look after you."
A spark of adrenaline fluttered to life in (Y/n)'s stomach and she dipped her head down, glancing at her stomach for a few seconds. She was very lucky. (Y/n) couldn't begin to imagine what it would feel like if her fears had come true and Evan's friends and family thought of her the same way the girls in her class seemed to think of her.
It didn't take them long to get to the hospital and (Y/n) sucked in a deep breath, trying to hide her smile when Maddie looped their arms together as they walked inside.
When they headed into the maternity ward and sat down in the waiting room, (Y/n) turned to look at the elder girl.
"Would… would you come into the scan with me? I don't wanna go in on my own."
She could see the surprise on Maddie's face, but it was as if she started to melt. Her brown eyes softened and her cheeks puffed up as she smiled and reached across to take (Y/n)'s hand.
"Of course I will."
(Y/n) had been into both her other scans with Evan. She didn't fancy going in on her own. She wanted someone there by her side to share the joy and the anticipation and help her feel calm.
Maddie ran her hand up and down (Y/n)'s arm for a few seconds since their arms were still locked together. But when she looked (Y/n) up and down, her smile changed into a smirk and she trailed her fingertips over (Y/n)'s shoulder and gave her collar a small tug.
"I thought I recognised that shirt." She muttered softly. She realised after a few seconds that it was Evan's shirt. That was why it looked so familiar and hung off of (Y/n)'s frame like she had shrunk and lost weight. But it did suit her. It made (Y/n) look a little small but very fashionable.
"Doesn't really hide it, does it?" (Y/n) murmured wistfully, moves her hands up and down her bump.
But she grinned when Maddie leaned over her and dared to rub her hand up and down her stomach for a few seconds.
"You don't have to hide, you're not a teenager, you've got nothing to be worried about. You look lovely, show it off."
"Evan said something similar."
It was only college and the girls in her class that were making (Y/n) uneasy about showing off her stomach. But she could feel her resolve ebbing away each day and Carla had topped it off today. (Y/n) didn't have to hide. She wasn't a young girl still in school wondering how she was going to bring up a child.
(Y/n) was in college and she was nearly done with her degree. She was in a stable relationship with someone she loved. She and Evan lived together, they were happy and they were doing this together. There was no reason for (Y/n) to feel worried or ashamed. Other girls on campus already had children and were taking their degrees at the same time.
And all the timing was working out. If (Y/n) passed her classes and got her degree on time, she would be done with college just before the baby was born. Then she could have some time off before she found herself a job at the hospital or a local doctor's office. (Y/n) could have her degree, have some time to herself to be with Evan and their baby and then get a job and be in the swing of things.
When her name was called out, the girls got up together and walked through after the nurse.
It didn't take long to run through the usual little tasks when they got in there. (Y/n) hopped on the scales, answered a few questions and then rolled her shirt up and tucked it into her bra so the midwife could check and measure her stomach.
"That all looks in order, shall we take a look at baby?"
(Y/n) kept her shirt rolled up and she smiled softly when she realised Maddie was looking over at her stomach.
She sat up on the bed and was grateful when Maddie took her hand and stood beside her. Both their eyes locked on the monitor and (Y/n) gave Maddie's hand a squeeze when the grainy grey and black image appeared on the screen.
It had been the plan for Evan and (Y/n) to get a scan photo, find a good frame and give it to Maddie as a present. That was how they were going to tell her she was going to be an auntie. That all went up in the air when (Y/n) wasn't well and (Y/n) still hated how Maddie found out, even if she had still been so excited and thrilled when she found out. Their original plan would have been much better.
But having Maddie here to witness the scan felt like they were making up for that failed plan and it made (Y/n) feel better.
"Oh, look." Maddie pressed her free hand to her chest and tilted her head to one side as she looked lovingly at the screen. That was her little niece or nephew. That was the child Maddie was going to spoil when they arrived. That would be the baby she would parade around and tell everyone was her little brother's first child.
She would take them out shopping and to play centres and to the cinema and on little dates out and about. Maddie would do anything and everything for them and she just knew they were going to have a much more loving and fulfilling home than what her and Evan had grown up with.
Maddie had tried to make sure Evan had felt loved and appreciated when he was growing up. She became his mother rather than his sister and she knew Evan was going to make sure his child knew he loved them to the end of the Earth. He would do everything for them that Maddie had done for him.
"Baby is a healthy size, and everything looks to be in order. Do you want to know the gender, or is it a surprise?"
"Can we know, please?"
(Y/n) gave Maddie's hand another squeeze and leaned up on her elbows, unable to look back at the monitor. Her gaze was solely focused on her stomach as she waited to know if she was going to be having a baby boy or a girl.
"Okay… it's a baby girl, congratulations."
A shiver coursed down (Y/n)'s spine while her lips curled into a wide smile. It was a little strange to hear a sincere congratulations after Carla's little remark earlier, but (Y/n) couldn't focus on that anymore.
She was having a girl. She was going to see Evan with a daughter in his arms. He was going to spoil her rotten. (Y/n) knew he had secretly been hoping for a little girl, although seeing him with a boy would have been a treat to see if a baby boy would look and take after him.
"A niece!" Maddie whispered triumphantly as she gave a small tug on (Y/n)'s hand and squinted at the monitor.
Sitting herself up, (Y/n) cleaned the gel from her stomach and slowly rolled her shirt back down. She gratefully took the scan copies the midwife printed, barely listening to her say about her next appointment in three weeks. All she could think about was going home and waiting for Evan to come home so she could tell him.
How was she going to tell him? What would be the best way to surprise him with this?
She looped her arm back through Maddie's as they walked out the room, both in a daze, staring at the scan photos they each had in their hands.
"Oh, Buck's going to be so excited. How are you going to tell him?"
"I don't know, I wanna surprise him somehow… what do you think?"
(Y/n) had never seen such a grin spread over Maddie's face and she seemed to pick up the pace as she steered them both back towards the car.
"I think we need to go shopping."
***
"What about this?"
Turning to the left, (Y/n) looked across at Maddie to see what she was holding out.
The pair of them had gone into town to look for a few things to get for the baby. (Y/n) had decided on doing a little gift bag for Evan with a few items inside to surprise him with the fact that they were having a girl. And so far, (Y/n) had found a dusty pink knitted blanket with roses stitched into each corner. She decided that once they'd settled on a name, she would embroider the name onto the blanket to make it more personalised.
Maddie had already found a lovely pair of purple dolly shoes. They just needed a few more things and then they would be all set to surprise Evan.
(Y/n) looked over to see what Maddie had found and she couldn't help the wide grin that spread across her face when she read it.
It was a men's large, jet black shirt with a circle of flowers in middle and 'Girl Dad!' written in cursive across the centre. It was a novelty shirt but it was definitely something Evan would wear and it would be a dead giveaway that they were having a baby girl.
"That's perfect."
Maddie looped the shirt over her arm and did a quick sweep round the shop and moved towards the baby clothing. "What about some of the Disney stuff?" They both knew Evan was a sucker for Disney movies so a little outfit would be perfect to add to the gift.
(Y/n) held the basket out so Maddie could place the shirt and shoes in there and smiled before she moved over to the other rack of baby clothes.
It felt good to be out and about with someone other than Tina. (Y/n) didn't have a lot of close friends and Tina was the only person (Y/n) felt comfortable going out with, other than Evan. But having Maddie as a friend and now as a big sister was comforting and (Y/n) was gaining a lot of close friends in the people Evan worked with.
She felt herself becoming lost in her thoughts and it took a lot of effort for (Y/n) to stop her hands from moving down to her stomach. She was bubbling over with excitement about telling Evan. It was all she wanted to do. She wanted to see him grin and move to touch her stomach and say how happy he was.
"Oh look, it's mummy-to-be."
That shrill voice sent shivers crawling down (Y/n)'s spine. She didn't dare turn around.
Her breath caught in her throat and her blood ran cold and dwindled down to her feet as the baby did a summersault in her stomach.
Why did they have to be here? Why did Sandra have to be here at the exact same time as (Y/n)? Wasn't it bad enough they shared the same classes at college and Sandra thought she had the right to follow (Y/n) around and tease her? Why did she have to carry it on outside of college?
Couldn't she just ignore (Y/n) and carry on with her day?
(Y/n) could feel tears prickling in the corners of her eyes already and she deadlocked her hand around one of the onesies she had pulled off the rack. She tried to push away the tears and swallow down the lump in her throat before she dared to look over her shoulder and see who was walking up towards her.
It was Sandra and two other girls, Mary and Ebony. It was strange to see Sandra without Carla, but then again, (Y/n) had never bumped into them outside of campus before. She didn't know who they hung around with and she didn't want to know either. (Y/n) wanted nothing to do with them.
"Where's your fireman?" Ebony leaned her head to one side and did a quick look up and down (Y/n)'s frame, scrutinising her.
It took all of (Y/n)'s strength not to bind her arms around her stomach to hide her daughter from their prying eyes. She didn't have to be worried or ashamed. This was none of their business.
Trying to hold her head up and keep a calm, unphased expression, (Y/n) pursed her lips and gave them one glance before she looked down at her basket.
"At work. Where's your partner?" If they thought asking these type of questions was normal then (Y/n) would throw them right back. If they could ask her and prod and be nosey then so could (Y/n).
"Will he be at graduation?" Ebony pestered, totally ignoring (Y/n)'s question.
But there was no time for (Y/n) to respond before Sandra cackled and tossed her head back as if she'd heard something funny. She looked (Y/n) up and down again before moving her hand towards her stomach. (Y/n) wasn't sure whether Sandra was just trying to point towards the baby or if she wouold actually dare to reach out and touch her, but she didn't want to find out. She took a step back before Sandra could get too close.
"Be realistic, Eb. He'll be babysitting to save the embarrassment."
That hurt.
(Y/n) could feel her stomach twisting again and she sank her teeth down into her lip to stop herself from making a noise or crying. She couldn't let them see they were getting to her. It was only a few words from people who didn't know her. People who had the nerve to talk about Evan as if they knew him intimately and knew what was going through his head.
If they only spoke to him they would realise how thrilled he was and how angry he would be if they spoke like this in front of him.
"I'm sure you'd know all about embarrassing moments." (Y/n) nodded at Sandra before she stepped around her and moved to walk away.
She wasn't sure where she was walking or which direction she wanted to be going in, but she just wanted to be away from them. Today had been a good day. Two easy classes, a capable workload to take home and work through, an amazing scan. And now she was out with someone she classed as her sister trying to have a fun, stress-free afternoon. They couldn't walk in and ruin it.
"So, you're going through with it then? Trying to keep that fireman tied to you with a baby. It'd make him look horrid if he walked out on a little girl when she's having his kid- presuming it's his, of course. Not like he's got much of a choice but to stay."
Her hand balled into a fist at her side and she spun back around to face the three gargoyles that wouldn't leave her alone.
"Why is this any of your business? Why don't you go speak to my fella, see for yourself how happy he is so you can stop worrying about him so much." Her voice wobbled and rose with the spite she could feel crawling up her throat.
This was nothing to do with them. If they were so concerned about how Evan was feeling about all of this (Y/n) would gladly introduce them to him so they could see for themselves that Evan was overjoyed.
They could find out that Evan had already told his parents and everyone he worked with. They could see that he had sorted his annual leave with Bobby so he could be home when the baby was born and spend two weeks with (Y/n) after she gave birth and be with her and the baby. They could talk to him and see that he was already starting to get things ready for the baby's arrival.
"He's happy that an inexperienced girl's having his baby? Can you even look after a child, or is that gonna be his job too?"
A shudder ran down (Y/n)'s spine when she felt a hand on her shoulder and for a moment, she coiled in on herself and shrunk down.
Panic surged through her veins at the thought of Carla or another one of the plastic squad appearing behind her out of thin air to gang up on her. They wouldn't hurt her, that wasn't their style. But their belligerent yapping and snarky, rude and hurtful words were getting too much now.
But when (Y/n) looked over her shoulder, she sighed and leaned back into Maddie.
She felt Maddie's hand tighten around her shoulder while Maddie placed her other hand down on her hip and glared at the three girls in front of them. She looked them up and down with narrowed eyes and huffed as if she thought they were nothing much to look at. She did not look impressed.
"And just what experience do you have to be talking to (Y/n) like that?"
When none of them answered, Maddie gave them another look up at down before she turned (Y/n) in the other direction to guide her away from those girls, whoever they were.
But two feet away, a sudden thought came over Maddie and she leaned over near (Y/n)'s ear. "Are they from your class? The girls Buck talked about?"
She'd almost forgotten the fact that Evan had told her (Y/n) was a bit anxious going to classes. She remembered he said some girls in class found out about (Y/n)'s private life and were teasing her because of it. Maddie couldn't believe they were in college and acting like they were little school girls who thought it was okay to pick on someone just because she was choosing to life her life the way she wanted.
"It doesn't matter. We just need something for the baby and a gift bag." Reaching behind her, (Y/n) gave Maddie's wrist a squeeze.
She felt better already now that Maddie was back with her. She felt confident having her sister with her. The snotty girls wouldn't dare say anything to her or torment her when she was with family. If Evan was here they wouldn't have approached (Y/n) at all.
But (Y/n) spun round when she felt Maddie let go of her and her heart lurched up into her throat when Maddie walked back towards the three of them.
"Excuse me."
Maddie placed her hands on her hips and began to tap her foot against the floor until all three of them turned to face her. She was older than them. She and (Y/n) were the mature people here and Maddie wasn't going to let them get away with this. If they wanted to be children, Maddie would scold and treat them like little girls.
"You do realise that to be a nurse, you can't be judgemental? I pray for the teenage mother who goes to the hospital and gets you as her nurse, passing judgements left right and centre. You won't make it very far with so little wit and understanding. Grow up."
With that being said, Maddie turned on her heels, her hair whipping over her shoulder, and walked back over to (Y/n). She linked their arms together and guided them both towards the other baby section. They were here to look for things for Maddie's niece and she was going to be proud of that.
Leaning her head on Maddie's shoulder, (Y/n) gave her arm a squeeze and cuddled into her side. "Thank you."
***
Opening her eyes, (Y/n) tried to clear her blurry vision. Her cheek nuzzled into the pillow and she strained her ears to listen to the noises she could hear.
The front door being locked. Loud, thudding footsteps going into the bathroomand then retreating a few moments later.
Evan was home.
(Y/n) found herself grinning into her pillow and her arms wrapped around Evan's pillow that she had been hugging for the last few hours. She wasn't sure what movie was playing on the tv, she had been drifting in and out of sleep for the last two hours but (Y/n) didn't want to lay and go to sleep yet. Not when she knew Evan would be home at some point late into the night. She didn't like sleeping without him.
She could hear Evan mulling about downstairs before she heard him jogging up the stairs. His height and stocky build made Evan heavy-footed and easy to hear when he was milling about the apartment.
She moved her hand to rub her eyes and lifted her head to look for Evan.
He moved faster than (Y/n) anticipated.
A gasp bubbled past her lips and she grinned when Evan practically ran to the bed and climbed on top of her. He crawled up the end of the bed so fast (Y/n) didn't see him move and he flopped down on top of her, hovering with his nose just barely touching her own.
"Hi," (Y/n) laughed and reached up to cup Evan's face while she felt his hands slipping around her frame.
She wriggled around beneath him, huffing as she turned to lay on her back instead of her side so she could look up at him. And Evan settled himself between her legs, pushing his hips down into hers like he was trying to imprint her into the mattress.
"Hi baby. How'd it go, you and bubba okay?" Evan leaned up a little so he could look down at (Y/n)'s stomach before his eyes went back up to hers.
He could see the tiredness washed across her face and how hard it was for her to keep her eyes open, but she was livening up now that he was home. He had been bouncing off the walls all shift today. Evan just wanted to get home so he could know how the scan went and know what they were having.
He'd messaged (Y/n) mid-afternoon and he tried to get her to ring him so he could find out how it went. All he got told was he'd have to wait until he came home for 'his surprise'.
"It went well, bubba's fine and healthy."
(Y/n) groaned and dug her fingers into Evan's neck when he kissed her so deeply he was pushing her back into the pillow.
She wriggled around, squirming and trying not to giggle against his lips when he tugged the cover down and wedged his hand between them so he could try and find her stomach. His fingers danced across her stomach and started making aimless patterns while he stole every ounce of air from (Y/n)'s lungs until she was seeing stars.' "So… can I find out the surprise now?" Evan spoke breathlessly against her lips, stealing another kiss and swiping his tongue across her top lip. He nudged their noses together and looked down at (Y/n) eagerly like a child waiting for Christmas.
He watched (Y/n) flop her arms down beside her on the bed and she tilted her head to the side to glance at the bedside alarm clock.
"Babe, it's nearly midnight… you can't wait until morning?" (Y/n) reached out to card her fingers through Evan's hair and started to untangle his curls. She smiled when he leaned into the touch and a deep groan passed his lips when she gave a small tug on his hair.
"Baby," He whined, tilting his head back while those puppy-dog eyes worked magic on melting (Y/n)'s heart and turning her stomach to mush. "I've waited all day, and Maddie knows, she's been messaging me all day. Please? I wanna know."
"Okay."
She had made him wait all day and she had no idea Maddie had been messaging Evan, clearly trying to wind her brother up because she knew before him. And Evan was wound up tight and hyped up like a kid on sugar. He wasn't going to be able to sleep for a while yet and he was desperate to find out.
Tilting his chin up, (Y/n) kissed him and sucked on his lower lip before she gave him a nudge and slowly sat up with him.
She swung her legs over the side of the bed and heaved herself up to her feet, feeling like she could sleep standing up. Her back clicked into place and shivers rolled down her arms but she grinned when Evan's hands found her hips.
He groaned something incoherent against her neck and squeezed her hips as he climbed off the bed behind her. And (Y/n) realised he must have said something referring to what she was wearing. She had a pair of his loungewear shorts and cotton shirts on, both of which hung off her frame and showed off her stomach.
Evan glued his chest up against (Y/n)'s back and pressed his lips down against the top of her head. He followed her lead as she headed over to the stairs and guided him down, turning the lights back on as they walked.
(Y/n) dragged her hand through her hair, brushing a few locks out of her eyes as she led Evan through into the living room and over to the sofa.
She flopped down on the sofa and curled her legs up beneath her, sinking back into the cushions while she pointed at the sparkling silver gift bag on the coffee table. It was quite lucky that Evan had gone straight upstairs when he came home. If he had come into the living room first and saw the bag, (Y/n) knew he would have ended up opening the gift without her because he was so excited.
Evan excitedly perched down on the end of the sofa and motioned to the bag with such a wide grin he could barely see. "Can I?"
He rolled his lips together and reached out for the bag, pausing for a moment when (Y/n) shuffled over and leaned up on her knees. She wrapped her arms loosely around his neck and kissed the back of his head, leaning against his back so she could look over his shoulder.
His hands were trembling from excitement as he opened the bag and took a peek inside, reaching in to take out the first item he saw.
It was a knitted blanket. The material was soft and stretchy and felt like it had been made with cotton rather than with knitting wool. The colour was blushing pink. It had a dark red velvet ribbon sewn around the edging and in each corner there were crocheted roses, mostly red but two were dark fuchsia.
Folding the blanket carefully, he placed it down on the coffee table beside the bag, unable to refrain from smiling as he looked back in the bag.
Purple boots. So small they barely fit in the palm of Evan's hand, with little bows tied neatly on the front.
The next item made him laugh. (Y/n) tucked her face into his neck and kissed the junction beneath his jaw, feeling the way his throat vibrated as he laughed and held up the shirt to read it. A jet black shirt with roses and flowers, some of which looked similar to the tattoos Evan had on his chest and up his arms. And right in the centre, it said 'Girl Dad' in bright cursive letters.
He looked back into the bag and took out the last item laid at the bottom. A pale silver onesie with a crown in the centre and the words 'Daddy's Princess' written across the middle.
(Y/n) sucked in a deep breath when Evan twisted round so he was facing her. His hands moved down to cup the back of her thighs and he pulled her over until she was sat on his lap with her arms curved around the back of his neck.
She could see tears in his eyes and shivers ran up and down her nerves when Evan moved his hands up and as quick as anything, he pulled her shirt off. He tossed it somewhere across the other side of the room so there was nothing in the way of her stomach.
"We're having a girl? I'm gonna have a daughter?"
All the energy Evan had seemed to push through into his voice and leave his body oddly calm. He waited for (Y/n) to nod and he grinned against her when she kissed his lips.
He couldn't wait to tell everyone. He could go back to the station and tell them all that he was having a baby girl. He was going to have a daughter. He could tell Bobby he was going to have a granddaughter, since Evan thought of Bobby and Athena as his parents. He could see Eddie and Chris tomorrow and tell them he was having a girl, that Eddie would have a niece since Evan was Uncle Buck to Chris and he wanted Eddie to be a godparent to his daughter.
If someone on a call asked Evan if he had children, he could proudly tell that that he had a daughter. At the end of each shift, he was going to have two girls to go home to.
Pulling back, Evan wormed his arms back around her waist, pressing his palms flush against her skin while he leaned down until his lips and nose pressed against the top of her bump.
"Hi baby girl."
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elllisaaa · 1 day
Note
loved the bf!beomgyu!!! <3 could you perhaps do bf!taehyun as well? :)
the bf!txt agenda is not doing any good for my delulu hours but here we go !!
BF!TAEHYUN who is not the most talkative, but that is the most caring and observant boyfriend ever.
for example, he knows exactly what your coffee order is, he knows what your favourite snacks are, and he knows which song from your long ass playlist on spotify is your favourite. and these are things you don't even have to tell him, just because he always has an eye on you, and because he wants you to feel like a princess. and that's how taehyun makes you feel everyday. whenever you need something, bet he would hand you his card so you can pay for it. and don't even think about paying something for yourself or the both of you when you two are going out. but that's just because he wants to treat you like the queen you are.
"oh and i left my card for you on the kitchen counter, since you're going out with your friends this afternoon. i know you will do some shopping so get yourself something nice for our date tonight angel."
even if you don't workout, taehyun will bring you to the gym with him. he doesn't need you to do anything else than be there for him. it's maybe not what some would call quality time, but it is for both of you, especially when his schedule is so packed. he steals some kisses between his sets, lets you vent to him about your annoying coworkers, and smiles everytime you take his towel to wipe the sweat from his forehead. and yes, he also loves it when you gush over his muscles and how strong he is. he's often the one praising you, and when you compliment him, he always finds a way to turn it back and fluster you. so sometimes, you make it your life mission to make him blush instead. and he lets you do so because you have him wrapped around your finger.
"you're very pretty today angel." - "but you're prettier tae, the prettiest boy in the world." - "what did i do to deserve you ?"
you know that your boyfriend sometimes struggles to talk about his emotions and feelings, and you're always here for him no matter what. but when he finally opens up to you, he's never backing up. everytime he feels bad or tired we would've kept it to himself and stayed alone before. but now, after a long day at work, all he wants is to come back home to you and hold you close to him. sometimes he needs to tell you everything that happened, and sometimes he just needs you to soothe him into your embrace. either way, he feels the most at ease, the most loved when he's close to you. in the mornings after these nights, he wakes up before you to make you breakfast as a thank you, even if you insist that he doesn't need to and that it's your job as his girlfriend. but the princess treatment never ends with taehyun, and he will never take you for granted.
"just eat angel, i did it because i wanted to and because i love you."
BF!TAEHYUN who pays for everything just so he can literally ruin you for any other men when you come back home.
because the reason he let you borrow his card to pay for your hair, your nails and your clothes, has some ulterior motives. he loves it when you're all dolled up for him, when you take up so much time to look even better than usual for him. he especially loves it when you're wearing skirts or dresses, because it gives him an easier access for when he bends you over the couch and fucks you from behind. he loves it when your makeup runs down your face because you're crying from how good he's making you feel. taehyun loves it when your hair are all tangled and messy because he's tugging on them when you're sucking on his cock. and he loves it when he sees the scratching marks your brand new nails he payed for had left on his back.
"that's it princess, cry for me. feels good ? i know it does."
taehyun is always willing to give you everything you want in bed, as long as you're good for him and doing everything he's telling you to. one of his favourite ways to torture you a little is by edging you. you can choose how he's pleasing you - his mouth, fingers or cock, whatever you want, he'll give it to you - but you have to warn him every time you're close, and he'll stop. and when he finally lets you cum, he's telling how proud of you he is, how good you are for him, and how good he's gonna fuck you as a reward. and he does fucks you good, so good you're going dumb and can only whine and cry out for him.
"my good girl, i'm gonna take care of you, hm ? gonna reward my angel."
but when you're not following his orders, or when you decide to be a brat and act out, he has no other choice but to discipline you, right ? his go to punishment is to bend you over his lap and spank you. taehyun makes you count each slap he gives you, finding it cute how red the skin of your ass gets with each new one. he loves it when you stumble over your words, moaning and crying out when he slaps your butt one more time. each time, you take your punishment so well he cannot do anything else than rewarding you with his cock, because after all, you're his princess and he just wants to give you the best. and obviously, he loves it when you're all cute and innocent, but the best moment is when you become nasty and desperate for him and he gets to lovingly degrade you.
"my pretty little slut, acting like a saint and whoring yourself out for my cock."
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kpop---scenarios · 19 hours
Text
Whiplash (3)
Tumblr media
Pairing: Felix x Reader x Hyunjin
Genre: Street Racing, Gang, Friends to Lovers
Warnings: Violence, Language, Smut [18 + Minors do not interact!]
Word Count: 3.4k
Tag List: @sheala--marie @kayleefriedchicken @chartrucewhore @cookiesnmilfx @thicccurls @aznstoner
Part One | Part Two
“You absolutely are not.” Hyunjin deadpans. “It's not safe.” You look at him and Felix with a less than impressed look.
“You guys hid this from me for years, I want to see what it's about.” You tell them. “Not to mention if it's not safe, then neither of you should be going.”
Both men look at each other as you look at Felix with a cute smile on your face, and of course, he caves, in record time too. He grabs your hand, pulling you towards the door with a frustrated Hyunjin in tow. You slide into the backseat of the car as Hyunjin gets into the front with Felix. You were nervous, but you were also excited to see what was going to happen.
You did your best to try and ignore the sinking feeling in your stomach as Hyunjin drove to the spot. You had assumed it would be on some busy street, making it even more dangerous, but it wasn't. The three of you pull up to an abandoned road that is hidden by some trees. It went on for miles with a few curves, so to the racers, it was absolutely perfect.
“Y/N.” Hyunjin starts as he parks the car. “Stay behind us, please. There's a lot of dangerous people that will be here, and if we're not around, find one of the guys.” He says. The three of you get out of the car, walking towards the large circle of people that has gathered. There were even more people than at the party, you couldn't believe how popular this was.
“Who's racing?” You ask, linking your fingers with Felix and Hyunjin on the other side of you. The two men glance at each other, avoiding your question as they pull you through the crowd and into the middle of the circle, where San and his group stand across from the group of your friends. your stomach sinks as you watch each of them eye each other up. They all looked like they were ready to start and all out fight.
“Racers, step forward.” Someone yells. You watch as San steps away from his group, standing in front of them, with another man you didn't know. Chan and Changbin turn to look at Felix and Hyunjin, they both let go of your hands, each one giving you a small kiss before stepping out in the front, standing in front of San and the other man.
“They're racing? No, Chan, please. What if something happens?” You ask. He looks at you with an apologetic look. “Look, They're the best. They'll be okay, promise.” Chan half smiles, wrapping his arm around your shoulder, giving you a small squeeze. You watch as Hyunjin and Felix get into a car you didn't recognize, Felix sitting behind the steering wheel. The cars start, both revving their engines as they wait for the flag to drop.
Seconds later, it drops, and all the tires squeal as they peel down the road, the cars drifting from the force. They leave your sight almost in a blur. You could barely hear the cheers of the crowd as your heart pounded in your ears. You were terrified something was going to happen to them. That couldn't happen. You had just gotten them. You needed more time. You reach down, grasping to Chan's hand as you listen to the revving of the engines, sounding so far away. Your grip doesn't loosen, especially in the minutes you stand there waiting to hear something, anything. You wanted to hear a motor, an engine, as long as it wasn't a crash. Please, don't let them crash. You close your eyes, taking deep breaths as you hear the cars coming closer. Your eyes shoot open, seeing them just around the corner, the red car Hyunjin and Felix are in, now taking the lead. Your grip tightens on Chan's hand as you watch them come closer and closer. You can see San screaming and swearing inside the car, hitting the steering wheel as Felix and Hyunjin cross the finish line seconds before him.
Felix and Hyunjin exit the car, victory grins spread across their faces. Seconds later, a crowd gathers around them, cheering them on. You let go of Chan's hand, running towards the group, pushing your way through the crowd, standing in front of them before they both wrap their arms around you. As everyone celebrates, you can vaguely hear San yelling about something.
“Nah, fuck them man, they fucking cheated.” He yells, pointing to Felix and Hyunjin. As you look up, San pushes through the crowd, shoving people out of his way until he stands face to face with Felix and Hyunjin. He doesn't say anything to them, just stares at them, fuming and vibrating with anger.
“How the fuck did you cheat?” He yells, shoving Hyunjin, which almost knocks you down but Felix catches you.
“What the fuck is your problem?” Felix yells, grabbing onto your wrist, guiding you behind him.
“You two are my fucking problem.” He snaps. “There's no way you should have fucking won that, it's bullshit.” San snaps.
“Take the loss man, next time, just try to make sure you're better.” Felix smiles, patting San on the shoulder which very clearly pisses him off even more. San lunges for Felix. Felix is pushed back by San, hitting into you, knocking you into the ground. Felix turns his head, glancing at you quickly to make sure you're okay before he looks back at San. Before he can do anything, Chan is grabbing onto the sleeve of Felix to pull him away. “Cops!” He yells, pulling Felix and Hyunjin who is now helping you up. You're all running to the car, sliding in without seat belts as Hyunjin speeds off, kicking up rocks as he leaves the parking lot. The three of you pass 4 cop cars with their lights on and sirens blaring as they head towards the abandoned street. Worry fills up your stomach as you look back at them, watching them turn, and hoping they don't turn around to come after you.
the three of you pull up to the house, and you feel like you can breathe. While being stressed out, you also felt an amazing sense of adrenaline rushing through your body.
“Wow!” You exclaim as the three of you walk into the house. “You guys do that all the time?” You ask. They nod nod their heads.b
“I was so fucking nervous when you guys started racing, but the scattering before the cops got there was such a rush!”
“We get that all the time during the races.” Felix laughs.
Your eyes go wide. “Can I be in the car during one?” You ask.
Both men look at each other, unsure of how to answer. “Let us uh, think about that.” Hyunjin smiles.
“Thank you for bringing me and letting me into your world.” You smile, kissing each of them on the cheek. “Where are the others?”
“Probably at the clubhouse. They stay there often.”
“You have a clubhouse too!? What the fuck.” You laugh. “Anything else you wanna tell me?” You ask, letting out a big yawn.
“Come on, let's go to bed.” Felix says, guiding you to his room. You wondered how this was going to work, especially between the three of you. You walk onto the room, Felix begins rummaging through his drawers and then hands you a large t-shirt.
“You can wear this to bed.” He smiles as he and Hyunjin take off their shirts. You swear you would have started drooling if you hadn't stopped yourself.
“fuuuck.” You whisper as you wander to the bathroom to change.
“You know you don't have to change in there. We are your boyfriends.” Hyunjin yells through the door.
“Is that what you are? I thought we were friends.” You joke back. Yes, they were your boyfriends but it had just happened that night. You were going from best friends who had only seen you in your underwear and a bra by accident to being with them and being fully naked. It felt surreal and you would need time to remember that you're not just friends anymore. You come out of the bathroom, Felix’s shirt hanging off your body. Both men smile at you as they lay on opposite sides of the bed, your spot in the middle waiting for you. You let out another big yawn as you crawl into the bed, getting under the covers. You lay on your side, facing Hyunjin as Felix scoots closer to you, spooning you.
You want to talk to them more, be awake with them but you're exhausted, the adrenaline wearing off now. You close your eyes, only wanting too for a second but you fall asleep almost instantly with two men wrapped around your body.
The next morning you wake up, feeling slightly empty. You open one eye, seeing Hyunjin was already out of the bed and gone. It was just you and Felix, whose hard chest was pressed right up against you, along with something else that was hard, pressed against your ass. You close your eyes again, wiggling yourself against him, listening to his breathy moans in your ear as you press against him harder.
“Fuck. Do you have any idea what you do to me?” He groans, rolling himself over, pinning your hands down to the best. He leans down, pressing his lips against yours. You take no time deepening the kiss, opening your mouth to let his tongue slide in. Felix lowers himself onto you even more, rubbing his hard cock on you, teasing you. You break the kiss, looking at him with pleading eyes.
“Please.” You gasp.
“Do you need more, baby?” He asks, a smirk on his face. You nod your head as he moves his body down yours. He lifts up your shirt, exposing your naked pussy. “I've been wondering how you taste.” He whispers as you lift your legs and spread them for him. Felix positions his face between your legs, moving in to lick a small strip up your pussy, causing you to gasp and buck your hips. He holds you down as he uses the tip of his tongue, gently flicking your clit, making you desperate for more.
“Please.. more.” You cry out, trying to grind yourself against his face. You can hear him chuckle into your pussy as he starts rolling his tongue against you, managing to get an almost perfect suction. You lift up your shirt, exposing your tits. You roll your nipples between your fingers as Felix uses the flat part of his tongue to lick you hard, moving up the length of your slit until he latches his lips to your clit, sucking hard.
“Oh fuck.” You cry out, trying harder to grind against his face. You could feel your orgasm bubbling up inside of you and you needed him to move faster. “Faster. Please. Fuck.” You gasp, your hands moving to his head, grasping onto a clump of his hair. Felix's tongue moves faster switching between swirling, licking and flicking your clit. He easily slides two fingers inside of you bringing your orgasm faster.
“Fuck, I'm gonna cum.. I'm cumming.” You cry out, your hips buck up as he continues sucking on your clit, helping you ride your high just a little longer. You let go of his hair, running your hands through your own hair as you try to catch your breath.
“That was so fucking hot.” Felix says, licking all the cum from his face. He quickly gets rid of his boxers, sitting down on the bed. You crawl over to him, licking your lips at the sight of his large, hard cock standing up for you. You wrap your mouth around the tip, swirling your tongue around it, licking up the pre-cum that had been dripping from him. You inch down his cock, little by little until he hits the back of your throat. Felix groans, thrusting his cock deeper, making you gag. You pull your mouth off of him and he leans back, leaning against his headboard. You move closer to him again, crawling up to him, squatting over his cock. You line yourself up, slowly sinking yourself down on him. You gasp loudly as he stretches you out. You throw your head back as you sit on him, slowly rocking back and forth. Felix places his hands on your hips, rocking you faster. He leans forward, wrapping his lips around your already perky nipple, sucking hard as you begin to bounce on his cock. He releases your nipple, holding you up to instead quickly thrust inside of you. You moan louder and louder with each thrust.
“Be louder for me, baby.” Felix groans, feeling his own orgasm coming quickly. You moan louder, crying out in pleasure as he fucks you harder and faster.
“Shit I'm gonna cum.” He grunts.
“Cum in my pussy. Please fuck cum in me.” You cry out, your own orgasm exploding through your body, tightening yourself around his cock. Seconds later Felix cums deep inside you.
You sit on his cock for a second, catching your breath until you finally roll off, your legs feeling like complete jello.
“I need to shower.” You breathe, trying to crawl out of the bed. You slowly make your way to the bathroom, only closing the door behind you before you turn on the water to hot.
As you wet your hair and rub the water all over your body, you hear the bathroom door open and then shut.
“Hello?” you call out. No one answers. The shower curtain is pulled back, revealing a naked and hard Hyunjin.
“Can I join you?” He smirks. A grin plasters on your face as you nod your head yes. Your pussy was sore, but you would never say no to either of them and if you ever did, something was wrong with you.
Hyunjin walks into the shower with you, grabbing your body and pulling you into him. He leans in, kissing you on the lips for a second, before moving to your neck and chest. As he peppers you with kisses you reach out, grabbing his cock. He moans in your ear as you gently jerk him, his head now resting in the crook of your neck. He pulls your hand off of him, turning you around and bending you over. your hands are on the wall of the shower as he shoves two fingers inside of you, making you cry out.
Fuck you felt needy. You desperately needed his cock to slide inside you right at that moment.
“Fuck me, please Hyunjin.” You beg.
“Mhmm that's what I like to hear.” He groans. He lines himself up with your entrance, slowly pushing his cock inside of you.
“Holy shit.” You cry out, holding onto the wall a little harder. For a second he starts out slow, but then he pulls out of you before ramming his cock back inside of you, over and over again. He reaches around you, grabbing your tit as he thrusts deep inside you. His hand moves down your stomach, making its way between your lips, to your clit. He begins rubbing you, he loves feeling you squirm from it while his cocks inside you.
“Your pussy feels so fucking good.” He groans, rubbing your clit a little faster. You can feel your orgasm building quickly.
“Shit.. harder.” You cry out. He manages to fuck you harder and faster, until you finally cum, all over his cock.
“That's my girl.” He groans, his hands now on your hips as he rams his cock deeper and deeper. Your arms were getting weak from holding the wall now, you were exhausted and ready for a nap. Hyunjin rams himself into a few more times before pulling out, jerking his cock until he cums all over your back.
“Fuuuck.” He moans, as he milks himself for all his cum. You're breathing heavily as you stand up, your whole body shaking. Hyunjin quickly cleans off your back for you, making you laugh.
“Why did you cum on my back?” You ask.
“I just.. wasn't sure.” He chuckles.
You lean in, your lips brushing against his ear. “Next time, cum inside me.” You whisper, turning off the water and getting out of the shower. You wrap a towel around your body and your hair, stepping out into the room, Felix nowhere in there. Hyunjin comes out behind you, kissing your shoulder before heading to his own room to get dressed.
You put on your outfit from the night before and head out into the living room. The boys are all sitting around, while Chan is on the phone. Changbin, Han and Seungmin look at you, wiggling their eyebrows and snickering.
“Oh whatever.” You scoff, laughing with them. You had been a little loud this morning.
“Everything okay?” Changbin asks Chan, who sits in a chair, looking annoyed.
“San has requested a rematch. He wants to race you two again at a different spot.” He explains.
“We're not betting the mods again.” Felix deadpans.
“Nah, $50k this time.” Hyunjin and Felix nod their heads as you stand there with your mouth hanging open.
“I'm sorry.” You say. “Fifty thousand.. as in dollars?” You ask.
“Yes..” Chan replies. “Dollars.” He looks towards Hyunjin and Felix. “He sent the coordinates. Google it, check it out and make sure you know the route.”
“When's the race?” Han asks.
“Tonight.” Chan sighs.
**
Hours later you return to the house, in a fresh set of clothes and a pair of pj's and another set of clothes ready incase you end up staying the night again. Both Felix and Hyunjin insisted that you sit this one out tonight but there was absolutely no way you were missing it. As you, Felix and Hyunjin drove to the spot, the car was quiet. You were slightly worried that they were mad at you for not listening but you didn't speak up. You didn't want to upset them more before the race. An hour later, the three of you pull into an empty parking lot, drive through to the woods to find a very large crowd of people waiting.
San and his group were already there, drinking and being rowdy and you were nervous.
“Are you mad at me?” You blurt out before getting out of the car. They both turn their heads to look at you.
“What?” Hyunjin asks.
“No?” Felix answers.
“Okay, just wanting to make sure.” You smile, hopping out of the car. You make your way through the crowd, finding Jeongin and Lee Know, grabbing onto their hands as Felix and Hyunjin stand before San.
“No fucking cheating this time.” San yells, pointing at the two. They just laugh, heading for the car that Han brought, the same one that made them win last time.
You watch all they rev their engines, waiting to be able to go. You see before the flag drops, San has already started moving. It drops and Felix and Hyunjin go, already behind San. You were worried now and wondered if you were the only one to notice that San cheated. You hear the squeals of the tires as they turn corners. It felt like a lifetime before they came back into view, Felix and Hyunjin in first place. They pass the finish line, with San only seconds behind. You run through the crowd to greet them and congratulate them but that worried feeling hasn't gone away. San comes storming over, again, yelling about them cheating. As he raises a fist, not even letting them talk first you step up.
“Why are you trying to pass the blame, San?” You yell. “I saw you. You started going before the fucking flagged dropped.”
You can hear everyone murmuring, talking amongst themselves about what you said. San looks around at everyone glaring at it.
“I didn't fucking cheat!” San yells, looking around at everyone.
“Did anyone record it?” You ask. Someone puts their hand up, bringing their phone to you.
“Why don't you just shut the fuck up!?” San screams, shoving you hard. You fall back, your head cracking on a large rock that was behind you. Hyunjin and Felix are at your side, you're unconscious, blood spilling from your head.
“Someone help her! Please!”
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