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junipersramblings · 11 months

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An Aroace Perspective on the Problem of Playing "Hard To Get" (Vent post)

So, for those of you that don't know already, I'm an aroace cis female, and I'm a high schooler. Apparently, I'm also fairly good looking, but I don't really have any opinions on that and frankly don't give a shit about dressing to look nice unless it's because I want to.

As you can imagine, this is a great combination of traits /s

I'm putting the actual vent under the cut so if you don't want to read this you don't have to.

I've always thought the concept of playing "hard to get" was strange, even before I figured out that I'm Not Straight. My thoughts were always "why would you want someone who keeps asking you out after you say no? Wouldn't you want to date someone who just leaves you alone if you reject them?" and that remains my perspective today, knowing what I do about myself now.

As for why I'm making this post today? Well, I highly doubt he'll ever see this, as he doesn't know I have a tumblr, let alone my url, but if he ever does? Well, this one's for you (derogatory)

This all started near the end of Year 8 (I'm Year 10 now). We're in the same homegroup, and so we're stuck with each other for two hours a week, every week, until we graduate. We had an assembly and we were sitting in homegroup rows, the same way we always do. By pure chance, I ended up sitting next to him, and happened to overhear him talking with a couple of his friends about a girl he liked, until one of them saw me and said "dude she's right next to you".

His response to this was to ask me out to dinner. (Bear in mind, we're both barely fourteen at this point).

I said no, and he turned back to his friends, disappointed. One of them told him he "hadn't asked me out correctly". Nearly two whole years later, and I still don't know what that means. So he turned back, and he asked me out again. I don't even think he changed how he said it.

Shockingly, I said no.

After that, he asked me what my type was, and I said "uhhhh I dunno. Not you?", since I was still figuring out my sexuality at the time, and quite frankly had no fucking clue what my type was. He seemed disappointed again, but let it go, and that was it for a whole year.

Then at the end of Year 9, we were given the schedule for activities week, which was the final week of the year, and a way for everyone to relax. Everyone in Years 7, 8 and 9 would be split up into four roughly equal groups, and rotate through activities for the entire week. It was actually pretty fun tbh. We went to a water park and a swimming pool, and I ended up really enjoying myself.

But when we were given the schedules, I had the bad luck to be sitting next to the guy that this whole post is about. He asked me what my favourite colour out of the four options (red, blue, yellow and green, the usuals) was, and I said green, so he started talking about how we should both be in the green group, and it'd be like a date. At this point in time, we didn't even know if we could choose our groups (spoiler: no we could not). I completely ignored him, as by this point in time, I was pretty certain of my sexuality, and even if I was proved wrong, it wouldn't have been by him.

Once again, things were pretty chill for a while. A month or two ago, I overheard him talking to his friends about me again, and realised "oh great, he still likes me". Fun times.

Today was when everything went properly wrong though.

Him and his friends have developed this annoying habit of beating pretty much everyone, including the teacher, into homegroup, and locking the door once they're in, so I have to cut through the neighbouring room, which happens to be three of my closest friends' homegroup. (This isn't really necessary for the explanation, but two of these friends happen to be the ones mentioned in a minute)

So I walk in and unlock the door, my usual routine these days. In fact, I unlock, test if the mechanism that keeps it open is working, and prop the door open with the bin when it becomes clear that the mechanism is broken. While this is happening, the boy (who from now on will be referred to as Rat Man, since he kinda looks like one (but like the rats you see in new york sewers in animated films), and it's clearer than just referring to him as "the boy") and his friends are pretty much heckling me from the back of the class, telling me to be a rebel and lock the door, and then Rat Man calls out "DO IT FOR [FRIEND'S NAME]!" I stop and look at them, already pretty sure where this is going, and ask him what my friend has to do with any of this. He's not even in our homegroup for fuck's sake!

Our conversation goes pretty much like this:

Rat Man: You know, because there's a thing between you two, isn't there?

Me: What do you mean?

Rat Man: You're more than friends aren't you?

Me (to myself): Oh for fuck's sake.

Me (louder): There's nothing between us. [FRIEND] and I are just friends.

Rat Man and Co.: Sureeeeee

Me: We are!

Rat Man Sidekick 1: Oh he's just jealous.

Me: I can see that.

Sidekicks: OHHHHHHH

Sidekick 2: Wait, dude, if she's just friends with [FRIEND], then you have a chance!

Me (not missing a beat): No he doesn't.

Sidekicks: OHHHHHHHHHHH

And from there, they start suggesting anyone else I would go out with, starting with one of the other friends from the homegroup I cut through (who isn't even a boy, she's just not out to anyone except our friend group yet), then both of the sidekicks.

To absolutely nobody who has read this far's surprise, I said no to all of them, although I would happily be in a QPR with both of my friends that were mentioned.

The teacher's arrived now, and I get my name checked off on the role so I can go to the assembly about the snow trip that's coming up in a few months (big deal in Australia unsurprisingly).

After that finishes, there's about ten minutes of homegroup left, which I spend, in true Juniper style, writing a fic. (The Malevolent one!)

Afterwards, I confront Rat Man as we're walking to our next classes, none of which we share, thankfully, and tell him we need to talk. His friends respond to this by cheering and slapping him on the back because he's talking to me. They're mostly fairly stereotypical jocks, with the exception of Rat Man himself, who is one of the few people in our homegroup shorter than me (I'm 5'2) and wiry. Hence the rat comparison.

I don't even know how the conversation derailed so quickly, but in about a second, I'm being asked which of the three is the hottest, to which I respond with "None of you?" They insist I have to choose one, and I just shut up. They have to go a different direction to me, so I tell Rat Man we'll talk at lunch. I'm pretty sure I heard him shout "Love you!" as I was walking away, but I'm refusing to unpack that.

Lunch comes, and I eventually track him down, and ask him if he knows what aromantic and asexual mean. (Fuck you tumblr, aromantic is not spelt wrong)

I was prepared for a lot of different directions this could go, and so I'd made sure we were near a teacher if I needed the backup. What I wasn't expecting him to do was burst out laughing and nearly choke on his sandwich.

About thirty seconds later, once he's stopped almost fucking dying, and his friends have asked him what the fuck is wrong with him more than once, he manages to ask "Asexual? Isn't that what chickens are? You know, because they lay eggs?"

I'm starting to think he only passed Health and PE last year because he's good at sports and they count as one combined subject.

I explain what it actually means, and he goes "Oh, so you're rejecting me?"

Me: Yeah, for what, the second time today? Fifth time total?

One of his friends comes and pulls him away, and I'm already late for flute ensemble, so I go to where my friends are, we all have a mutual moment of "what the FUCK?" over what Rat Man thought being ace was, I eat my lunch, and go to flute ensemble.

Once that's over, I have Fashion Design, so I go to class and kind of just stare at the work I'm meant to do for half an hour, before the teacher asks me if I'm okay.

I ask if I can go to the wellbeing office, because I'm having a bad day.

I'd spent the entire lesson up to that point gradually feeling shittier and shittier about what had happened with Rat Man at lunch, since I REALLY hadn't wanted to come out to him, but it seemed like the only way I could maybe get him to leave me alone.

I don't even know if it worked.

I spoke to a teacher, they were really nice about it, and I'm feeling better now, but it still really fucked me up.

The thing about playing "hard to get" is it means that sometimes, some people just can't take a hint. They're so used to the idea of girls that mess around to find someone who will be loyal to them that they assume that's what everyone is doing, and then shit like this happens.

So yeah, fuck the whole idea of playing "hard to get". It's bullshit.

#junipers ramblings #vent #long post #tw aphobia #tw arophobia #tw vent

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marcholasmoth · 1 year

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OSRR: 3015

guess all i needed was to complain one too many times about not being able to think to be able to think. figures, right?

i was able to write a message to my classmates and start doing research and make a bibliography for my part of the capstone project. i'm glad to be doing things.

also?????? someone at northeastern's financial aid department was exuding major big dick energy today because my application for my student loan (the second one) (the one i submitted yesterday that got sent to the school TODAY) got approved and certified within half an hour of being submitted. i have dispersal dates, too. i'm gonna be able to get new tires. but more importantly, i'll be able to pay for my classes!!! i just need to accost someone to waive the healthcare bullshit for me. because for real???? i don't need northeastern healthcare. i don't go to the school. i don't live near campus. i don't go to campus. ever. the one time i'll go near campus is for graduation in may, and maybe once before that if i can't get my problems solved over the phone. but then i'll be their problem! i'll sit on a desk and cross my legs and get leaves and shit on their paperwork until they fix it! i won't actually do that, not literally because as my mom stated yesterday i'm "too nice," but it's a nice thought. i'm not like that. which is unfortunate for every problem i've ever had. but it's nice to have advocates and people who will help me not be abused and mistreated, whether at work or in general. it's nice to have people in my corner. which is fuckin wild.

also i sat and worked with nancy for a couple hours today on biology. it's a lot of words that definitely aren't english and concepts that are still foreign to me despite having taken it before, but i don't care. i'd walk across hot coals for nancy and her family. for real. she's a delight and deserves to do well in everything.

this morning i went with my mom to the quilt shop in goffstown, where we dropped off the quilt top she just made and picked the quilting design and the thread color. she has me go with her because i have a good eye for it and she can't see things in her head. for both the pattern and the string, we went with both of my first picks. i love being right.

after the quilt shop mom and i went to ihop where our waitress was also named molly and who ALSO applied to go to grad school at northeastern but decided to go somewhere else because of how expensive it is. i'm like "hah, yeah, it's expensive all right lmao." so that was fun.

so the day went awake, shower, dressed, quilt shop, breakfast, i had mom bring me to joel's so i could pick up my chargers and let the doggo out, we took the long way home, stopped to buy pumpkins, stopped to look for plants, stopped for ice cream, finally actually went home, sat down and worked, went to work with nancy, and then came back to town to hang out with the eggs. we went to shaws for ice cream sundae supplies and then the wilton house of pizza for dinner, and we stopped at home to eat with mom because we got her stuff too. we got back to the eggs and eggy and i watched the first six episodes of the dragon prince s4 which is SO GOOD. i'm yelling. anyway, it's really good.

but now i'm home and in bed and it's late and i am so excited to sleep.

but also since joel and his dad and MY dad are at the same convention, joel sent me a picture of my papa from the back and papa sent me a text saying he'd seen joel and his dad at a table playing. it was so funny to just see a picture of my dad at some random place from joel, who also happened to be there. 🤣🤣🤣

#molly rambles #operation srr #osrr #3000s #3010s #sunshine boy

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jamsofdeath0 · 2 years

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Proof qi could generate Riverdale plots, via ai generated Riverdale plots.

"Jughead's Disaster"

1. The biggest mistake I ever made was buying a house with a basement...

2. I was never really interested in anything until my senior year of high school. And then I became obsessed with becoming a lawyer.

3. I got pregnant at 17 years old! There were no abortion clinics back then, and I had to go to the only clinic in town, where they would tell me that if I didn't want to carry to term, I could have the fetus aborted.

4. After going through some tough times, I eventually decided to put myself through college, and graduated with a degree in Law Enforcement. I spent 10 years working for the police department before deciding to start my own business.

5. My first business venture was Jughead's Disaster, Inc., the world's largest and finest provider of disaster services. I hired a bunch of people who couldn't do their jobs and charged them an outrageous amount of money for doing nothing. Within 6 months, we went bankrupt.

6. The second time around, I started my own landscaping company. We did well for a while, but after a while, everything turned to shit again. So I took out loans I knew I wouldn't be able to pay off, bought a brand-new truck, and started a lawn care service.

7. That lasted about 5 minutes. When I tried to cut grass, I realized that I wasn't as good as I thought I was. Plus, our customer base kept shrinking over the course of the summer. To make matters worse, our customers kept complaining about the smell coming from our trucks.

8. In desperation, I decided to become a real estate agent, since I figured that I'd be good at selling houses. Well, I'm not great at selling houses, but I am pretty damn good at finding houses to buy. I've been looking for a house for 2 weeks now.

9. All I need is a place to sleep for the night, a bathroom, a kitchen, a job, and a nice home to live in. But I'll settle for any of those things right now.

10. If you're reading this, I'm probably still alive. I don't know what happened to that email I sent you guys. I hope you all enjoy the rest of your day.

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Jughead's fantastical day out

1. "The journey begins."

This line represents Jughead's way of starting things off. He always starts something at the beginning and finishes it off completely. When he's not thinking about his friends, he's worrying about them. So, we know where his headspace is right now. He probably got some good news, but isn't sure how to react.

2. What kind of car?

We know he loves cars. But what kind of car? Maybe he's been looking forward to driving around town with his buds on Saturday. That's pretty exciting!

3. "I've never done anything like this before. I'm nervous."

He's finally doing something he wants to do, but he's still nervous about it. That could mean that he's going to get caught. Or maybe he thinks he'll have fun without getting caught, but then again - who knows?! Jughead's just excited to go somewhere new, so he doesn't want to disappoint anyone.

4. "What if I don't like it?"

Jughead doesn't want to do things unless he likes them. If he hates it, he may run home early. But, if he does love it, he might stay longer than expected!

5. "But I'm supposed to meet my friends here..."

He knows he should be meeting his buddies, but he also wants to hangout first. We'll bet they're all worried about him, especially once they find out that he didn't show up to work.

6. "Maybe I can hang out with them later?"

If he gets bored hanging out with his friends, he'll go back home. If he really misses them, though, he might decide to stay longer.

7. "This is the last thing I need. A bad day at work."

His boss is probably mad. His coworkers are probably pissed off since they think he's messing up their plans. And his friends will definitely tell him about this later. Why is he even doing this?

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Jughead's disasters

1. A Weed Man Named Jughead

In his youth, Jughead was a member of a famous gang whose members wore blue jackets and were known by their nickname, the Blue Meanies. One day, he fell out with the gang leader, who told him to leave town. Jughead responded, "I'm going to kill you," and went home. He got drunk and shot his father dead. When police arrived at the scene, they arrested him for murder instead of being allowed to shoot him again.

Jughead's mother had been married before, and she divorced her second husband after learning about Jughead's crime. She then married a widower named Nuggety McSnooterson, who adopted two children who were also raised as members of the gang. Nuggety and his wife renamed themselves The Snoots and moved to a farm outside of town where they grew marijuana to help raise money for their adopted children's college education.

Nuggety's first harvest yielded only enough marijuana to pay off the mortgage on their house. Jughead learned about Nuggety's growing operation, and he decided to take over the business. He renamed himself Dr. Crippen (after the infamous serial killer) and began making plans to kill Nuggety and his family. Meanwhile, Nuggety's son Jack realized what was happening and tried to warn his parents, but Jughead had already poisoned them both.

Jack survived long enough to call the police, but Jughead took revenge on him too. After killing Jack, Jughead turned his attention to Nuggety's teenage daughter, Ginger. He kidnapped her and brought her back to his lair, hoping that she would witness her father's death. Unfortunately, the girl escaped and ran away from home. She eventually joined her boyfriend, a young man named Jeffy Jones, who had left school to work at the local factory.

Jeffy knew Jughead well, since they attended the same church. He was happy to see that Jughead had finally changed his ways, but the two men still did not get along. The night before Jeffy was supposed to go away to college, he came home to find Jughead waiting for him. Jeffy was forced to sit down while Jughead explained his plan to kill Nuggety. He said that he wanted to make a fresh start in life and asked Jeffy to join him in the drug trade.

Jughead offered Jeffy $10,000 if he agreed to become his partner. That night, Jeffy went to sleep on the couch, thinking that he would have plenty of time to decide whether or not to accept Jughead's offer. But when he woke up the next morning, he found himself alone. Jughead had fled without saying goodbye, leaving Jeffy to wonder just how much money he really stood to gain from the deal.

Jughead soon returned to his lair with a new partner named Sludge. Together, they planned to sell drugs to middle-class citizens in order to finance their elaborate scheme to destroy the entire community. Their first big job was to steal a shipment of cocaine from a nearby warehouse belonging to Mr. Biggs, who was a rival drug dealer.

The following day, they drove to the warehouse, where they waited until Mr. Biggs' truck pulled up. Then, they followed behind him and watched as he loaded the cocaine onto his truck. As he walked back to his office, they jumped out of their car and seized the drugs. When Mr. Biggs saw that his truck was missing, he called the police. Soon, officers from the sheriff's department surrounded the warehouse. They searched everywhere but could not find any sign of the thieves.

Later that evening, Jughead and Sludge were relaxing in their hideout when the police showed up again. They searched the premises and found some blood that had spilled onto the floor. They suspected that someone had been injured inside the building, and they rushed to investigate further.

Inside the warehouse, they discovered the bodies of Mr. Biggs and his employees. There was no sign of Jughead or Sludge anywhere. They had vanished. In fact, no trace of anyone had ever been near the site of the crime. All of the evidence pointed to the conclusion that Jughead had killed Mr. Biggs and stole his cocaine. The police arrested Jughead and charged him with murder.

When the trial date approached, Jeffy decided to testify on behalf of his friend. As he described the events of the previous night, he mentioned that he had never seen Jughead carrying a gun. He added that he had always believed in his friend's good intentions, so he could not understand why Jughead had tried to kill Nuggety (and his family). However, he admitted that he had seen the pair together many times before, and he remembered that Jughead had boasted to him about his intention to kill Nuggety so that he could inherit the family fortune.

This evidence seemed to undermine Jughead's alibi. Police searched his house and found several guns hidden under the floorboards. They charged him with double homicide and attempted theft. Jeffy testified on Jughead's behalf, explaining that he had lied about seeing the guns on purpose. He said that he had been afraid that Jughead would try to kill him if he revealed the truth.

After hearing Jeffy's testimony, the jury acquitted Jughead of all charges. He and his accomplice had managed to fool everyone, including the judge and the jury and they felt confident that they could do the same thing again.

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#riverdale #ai generated text #ai generated #frase.io #side note i did like 10 of these and only kept my favorite. whys frase so upsseded with weed?

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vampkillr · 2 years

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The Yearbook — Peter Parker

male! reader — 2.7k words — slight angst — ambiguous peter (can be tom, andrew, or tobey) — reader's mom is dead — fluff — mention of sex but nothing happens it's only brought up srry — implied cis reader

Peter and I were the only two students in charge of this year's yearbook since the other students in the photography club had all graduated last year, leaving us as the only two people in the club. Since we were seniors and no underclassmen were taking interest in it, it fell upon us to make the yearbook really cool so it would hopefully reel in more club members before the club gets removed when we both graduate. It wasn't that big of a deal, but it really irritated me how he didn't show up to meet half of the time. Like right now, for example. I was being stood up once again, left completely alone save for the presence of the underpaid staff caring for other patrons checking in on me every ten-or-so minutes. Was he weirded out that I wanted to work on it over dinner? He could've just said something.

I sighed and picked up a menu, scanning the items. The menu itself wasn't very large, it was a single laminated page with a front and back to it. 'Breakfast served all day!' in a bold and particularly ugly font at the top of each side. The side I was looking at was their lunch menu, the other of course containing the multitude of breakfast choices. I didn't really want anything, but I needed to eat so I wouldn't have to make myself dinner by the time I got home, which would probably be some time at midnight with the way things were going. This diner wasn't very special or anything, it was small and had a few regular customers, but what I liked about it was that it was only ever packed during 'brunch hour' as everyone calls it. The workers were nice, the food was surprisingly good for a shabby downtown diner, and it was almost always near empty at this time of night— because no one eats breakfast or dinner at 8 P.M on a Tuesday.

"Hey man, you ready to order?" A guy not much older than me asked, grabbing a small notepad from one of his apron's pockets. I set the menu down on the menu stand at the side of the table that touched the wall and sighed.

"I'll just get some mozzarella sticks for now and I'll let you know if I end up wanting anything else." I spoke gently, not wanting to be a bother to the poor guy. He was very clearly on his wit's end and I made a mental note to give him a big tip when I go to leave. He wrote my order down and put on a smile.

"Anything else I can get you?" My eyes went to the water I was nursing, condensation building in pellets on the sides of the glass from not being touched in a while. I absolutely hated tap water.

"A glass of coke would be nice, yeah." We both sound exhausted in the same way. Tired of everything and just wanting to be finished with the day. I could see the look of recognition in his eyes as I sighed out my answer, a pitiful display of solace and relief that I wasn't going to be a difficult teenage asshole. As he left, I pulled my laptop closer to me and decided to call Peter instead of texting him. I hated calling people, so I usually don't do it, but I needed to make sure if I should design this yearbook by myself or not. We only had a week left and we weren't even close to being halfway done, which was mainly because I had been waiting for him to be with me to get any work done.

I pressed his contact from our messages and hit the call button, fully expecting to be sent to voicemail and being pleasantly surprised when he answered on the first ring. "Hello?" He sounded out of breath.

"I'm at the diner and you're not here, so I was wondering if you just want me to design this yearbook without you." I spoke almost bitterly. I was so sick of his shit at this point that the fact he answered was almost worse than it would be if he hadn't. The other end of the line was noisy, as if a car was on a racetrack right next to him, and then a few loud pops. "Where are you?"

"I really can't answer that right now," It sounded like he was running a marathon, only adding to my anger and confusion. "Just," A slight pause and more pops. "how about we skip school tomorrow and get it done? That sound good?" I sighed.

"If you manage to fuck me over tomorrow like you've done the past four times I'm doing it without you." I spoke and hung up before he could answer. The waiter came up to me with my coke and set it down carefully next to my laptop, which I closed and moved out of the way for safe measure.

"Anything else I can do for you?" He handed me a straw, and I shook my head as I opened it. I thought back to the phone call as I mindlessly put the straw in the cup and began to sip from it. What the hell was he doing, and more importantly, what were people going to think of us skipping school together? Would they even make the connection? I sighed and tried to focus on something else, but all of my thoughts found their way to Peter again. It was getting a bit difficult to ignore my crush on him. No matter how angry he made me or how abandoned he made me feel, something in me wanted nothing more than to love and trust him. It was ridiculous, but unfortunately you can't control who you fall for.

I scrolled through my phone for a bit and soon enough the mozzarella sticks I had ordered came, but my brows furrowed upon realizing there was was more than just the usual 7 sticks. "We needed to get rid of the rest of the ingredients, so I just made it so that you ordered the batch that was getting trashed after tonight anyways." The waiter spoke, and I'm assuming my face gave away my next question since he answered it. "On the house." He said with a tired smile.

"Thank you so much, that's really nice of you." He accepted my gratitude and left me to eat my food, which was still a little too hot to bite into. I stuck my pinkie into the sauce it came with, trying to see if the sauce was warmed or not, which thankfully it was. I checked the time on my phone. It was 9 P.M now. I needed to start heading home if I was gonna be up in time to play hooky with Pete tomorrow. I flagged down my waiter. "Hey, something just came up, can I get a to-go box?" He nodded and headed to the back and I pulled out my wallet. The total was probably gonna be about ten dollars, so I took out a twenty, a five, and then dad's credit card. The cash will be the tip, and using the card helps me prove that I was, in fact, at a diner in Manhattan.

I got home about an hour after the first subway ride. It was admittedly a long way back home without a cab, but I didn't want to shell out my weekly allowance on an overpriced ride that has a 70% chance of smelling like a rotting corpse. "What's that?" Dad pointed to the to-go box I had been carrying as I walked into the kitchen.

"Mozzarella sticks that you paid for, want some?" I opened the box and took out the sauce, putting the sticks in the microwave and letting it run for about 30 seconds. Dad seemed unimpressed.

"You look really bummed out, did that Parker boy stand you up?" My cheeks burned at this. "Do I need to call his father?" I sighed at his question.

"His mom and dad died a long time ago. And his uncle ben died a few months ago. I can't be mad at him while he's probably not okay." It all just poured from my mouth. I never was very good at keeping secrets from dad. "I'm trying to be as patient as I can for him, and I feel terrible every time I get angry at him for ditching me, but we need to get this yearbook done and he's not letting me work on it without him. Now I have to skip school with him tomorrow just so we can get this done on time when it was his fault to begin with." I took a mozzarella stick and tore it apart, stretching it for the inside to cool off before I bit into it, and dad followed suit after opening the sauce.

"Well, you like him, don't you?" He asked and I nodded earnestly. I really did. "I think you need to let him know that. If he feels like he has no one, and if he feels like you don't like him, of course he's not going to be very faithful with your plans. Especially since it's for school and not on your own volition. If you don't want to go at it from a romantic angle, at least let him know he has a friend." We stood in silence at the counter for a while, just eating while I thought about what dad said. Who knew a widowed attorney could have such good relationship advice.

"You're not mad?" I dipped a ripped piece into the sauce and popped it into my mouth, going to the fridge to pull out drinks for the both of us and coming back to where I was standing.

“That you're skipping school? A little upset.” He opened the bottle I was struggling with and handed it back to me, opening his own right after. “But I couldn't be happier that you like someone. It feels really good to be in love. I'm glad you get to feel that.” I sighed and took a sip of my drink.

“Doesn't feel good to get your heart broken.” He pat my shoulder.

“Losing someone you love hurts so bad because loving that person is the greatest feeling in the world.” I knew that dad knew this more than anyone else, especially after losing mom. “Anybody would be lucky to be loved by you, and I think that Peter could really need you to love him right now.” He wiped his mouth and began to leave. “I'm going to bed, I've got a case early tomorrow. Don't make a mess of the house and if you have sex, wear a condom–” I interrupted him.

“Ugh, dad!” I tried covering my ears but he yelled over my hand's ability to shield me from his voice.

“Or make him wear one, you know, free country! Love you!” I knew he was just joking around, but I'm also seventeen and so is Pete. Teenagers tend to do crazy stuff so I guess I can't fault him for thinking I'd be an idiot, but again Peter and I are both nerds and on the photography club so it's his fault for thinking either of us could score, even with each other.

I ate a few more mozzarella sticks and then put the rest in the fridge with the sauce, heading to my room and undressing for bed. I thought back to what dad said. He really did need a friend, and I could at least be that for him if not a boyfriend. I pulled my phone out and began to text him.

Me: i wanted to say sorry for being so angry at you recently. it's been frustrating for me being stood up every time i wanted to get this yearbook stuff done and we're almost at the deadline and it's making me really anxious, but i shouldn't have taken it out on you. i shut down when my mom died. i shouldn't have expected you to act any different and i'm sorry for putting that on you. i care a lot about you peter and i'm sorry for the way i've treated you recently because you don't deserve that at all.

Anxiety formed in the pit of my stomach the moment I pressed send, but thankfully I got a quick response.

Peter: Can I come over?

My brows furrowed. It was almost ten at night.

Me: like right now??? its 10 dude why would you come over rn

Peter: Because I'm already here and I have to tell you something really really really REALLY important

Me: YOU'RE ALREADY HERE????

Peter: Window :)

I opened my curtains and almost screamed when I saw Spider-man looking back at me, but then I just got upset. I opened my window for him. “You're fucking Spider-man?” My yell was hushed and at a whisper. He took his mask off and sure enough, it was Peter. My heart sank to the floor. I couldn't lose someone else, this wouldn't work. This wasn't fair. I sat down on my bed, very clearly dejected about the situation.

“What's wrong? Is this a bad thing?” He kneeled down in front of me to get me to look at him, treating me as if I wasn't in nothing but my boxers. “This actually wasn't even the important thing I needed to tell you.” He mumbled.

“Then what is it?” I fiddled with my fingers and he grabbed my hands, holding them in his own. Like it was natural to him, like he wanted to feel me just as much as I wanted to feel him. He said nothing, and only lifted himself off the ground slowly, leaning a knee beside me on my bed as his face moved closer to mine. I leaned back and one of his hands went to my neck to support me on the way down. He followed suit, not closing or furthering the distance between us and as I laid myself fully on the mattress, we stared at each other for a moment. “You've put me in a very compromising position, Parker.” I whispered. He backed up, but only slightly. As if he was afraid that if he moved he'd lose this chance forever.

“Do you not want me to do this?” He sounded deflated, clearly sad and bracing for my rejection. But unfortunately I couldn't bring myself to lie to him.

“I do,” He sank closer into me as soon as I said that, we were so close to kissing that I wanted to pull him into me, but I kept a grip on my morals. “that's the problem. I don't want to lose you. Now that I know that's a possibility,” I trailed off, resting one of my hands on the back of his neck and playing with the seam of his suit. “I'm scared, Pete.”

"I'm not going anywhere.” His voice was quiet and sweet, and within seconds he was finally kissing me. I wanted to stay like this forever, I wanted to hold him forever and feel him on my lips like this. My hands went to his cheeks and he pushed his body onto mine. I could feel the texture of his suit against my skin, and silently prayed to whatever would listen. I begged them to keep him safe because I knew there was no way I'd be able to turn away my feelings now. We separated and he leaned his forehead against mine, sighing contently. “I need to go before I fall asleep here.” He sounded reluctant, and clearly hesitated as he got up and backed away from me.

He put his mask on and was about to head out of the window, but I grabbed his wrist before he could. “Does this mean we're dating now? We're boyfriends now, right?” He laughed and lifted his mask above his lips, kissing me one last time.

“Yes, we're boyfriends.” After saying that he ran out of my window and swung off, leaving me to swoon over the fact I kissed my crush of five years.

likes, reblogs and feedback are appreciated. thank you for reading this far. my requests are open :) sorry that this fic is pretty bad i was kind of just writing to keep my engagement up.

#ao3 #fanfic #reader insert #writing #x male reader #male reader #spiderman x you #spiderman fic #spiderman x male reader #peter parker x male reader #peter parker x reader #marvel x reader #marvel x male reader #peter parker

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narutogwriting · 3 years

Note

Greetings! It I. Whomever the f*ck that is!

I don't know if anyone's every told you, but your writing is absolute Grade A Quality. And I, as in me, happen to nurse quite the interest for said A Grade writing. Shocking, is it not? Foolish! Of course it is not! Surprising. That is. It IS the best writing afterall! I- Hm... ఠ_ఠ

Okay, I'll stop horsing around, sorry,,,

I have come to make a request if that is alright with you and you do not have too many already!

I recently discovered the song "Heart Attack" by Deni Lovato and would really love a little story with boisterous and playful reader that's had the second longest-standing crush(after Hinata's, cuse, MAN, that girl be the inventor of pinning no jutsu) known to everyone, but Lee, where the crew could be out throwing one of those rare party where a majority of them can be present, eventually ending in a karaoke where the fuzzy warmth of what little alcohol the reader drank gives them the little bit of missing courage(or sensibility) to, just, climb on a table and spill all their feelings, love and frustration into this one song before loudly announcing that This One's For Lee, like a challenge.

If you would have the space/kindness to add the aftermath where the reader immediately sobers up after comfessing and just, absconds through a window, I would be the most grateful gal alive,,, >v<

I'll venmo you a goat.

Okay this was seriously WAY too fun to right Naruto is my one true love but Rock Lee was my first Naruto crush<3

HEART ATTACK

Pairing: Rock Lee x Reader

CW: good old fluff

Length: 3.6+

Summary: Rock Lee has been your not so secret crush for as long as you can remember. You’re determined to take it to your grave, but what happens when you’re drunk at a karaoke bar doesn’t stay at the karaoke bar...

The music was loud, the room was dark, and everyone was there. How long had it last been since everyone was able to get together?

The life of a shinobi was a busy, dangerous one. There was little time for laugh and play, especially as you all got older. It was easier when you’d just graduated from the academy. All of the missions given to new genin were level D to C, little things like gardening or finding lost pets that didn’t take much time or require you to even leave the village. It was easy for everyone to find time to get together and hang out.

But as time passed, things changed. Everyone’s ranks were different, some people like Shikamaru took up more political roles in the village. It was easy to drift apart without even realizing it.

So tonight was one of those rare moments where the stars aligned and the old group was able to get together to hang out.

The venue of choice; a karaoke bar.

It was the first time you were all able to drink together… Well, legally at least.

“Thanks, Kiba.” You giggled, giving him a flirtatious wink as you took the drink he’d just bought you, sipping it. Did you like Kiba? No. But was he fun to flirt with? Absolutely. And if that flirting led to him wanting to buy your drinks for you, well, who were you to deny him?

Kiba was cute; that wasn’t the problem. Heck, most of the guys from the Leaf were cute and way too easy to get along with. You’d known them practically your whole life, grown up together even, but despite all their great qualities, it was only one shinobi who had your heart, and he didn’t even know it.

The first time you’d seen Lee was before the first test in the Chunin exams. He had easily taken on Naruto and Sasuke without batting an eye. He was so swift, so smooth, you’d watched him in awe. He was a bit eccentric, but had a focus and prowess you’d never experienced before. You thought he was amazing.

You were content to watch him from afar until the preliminaries. During his fight with Gaara, you’d held your breath, watched in horror and amazement as he took on the demon of the sand. You didn’t think you breathed once during that battle.

Lee lost, was almost killed by Gaara before Guy stopped him, but it was the best you’d ever seen someone fight in your life.

Timidly and nervously, you visited Lee in the hospital that day. He was unconscious, but in stable condition. You didn’t know what motivated you, but you began to visit every day, leaving flowers and small treats for Lee to wake up to.

When he finally had woken, you were trying to slink out of the room quietly when you heard him speaking, causing you to freeze in your tracks.

“Who are you?”

Apprehensively, you turned to face Lee with a small smile. You’d never been shy, but there was something about Lee that made you weak-kneed.

After introducing yourself, you went back to his bedside. “I just wanted to tell you that I think you’re very strong. You’re so skilled and quick; I think you’re the best ninja I’ve ever seen…”

You were only thirteen, didn’t have much experience in the ninja world, so the words you spoke were true. You didn’t know if telling him that, as a total stranger, would make him think you were weird.

Imagine your shock when Lee burst out in happy tears.

It was the beginning of a beautiful friendship.

You supported Lee in his recovery, and even when he couldn’t go on missions himself, he cheered you on from the sideline.

From the very beginning, it was evident to everyone in the village that you were head-over-heels for Lee. Your quiet bashfulness when Lee was around was a stark contrast to your usual loud and confident self. Everyone knew about your crush.

Everyone except for Lee.

“Why don’t you just tell him?” Tenten asked you once. “You never know.”

But you’d only shaken your head. “He loves Sakura. Everyone knows that.” You told her. “Besides. We’re friends. I don’t want to ruin that friendship.”

So despite your friendliness, your flirtatious nature, and the fact that you could have just about any of the rookie nine wrapped around your finger if you so pleased, you weren’t interested in any of them.

Rock Lee was the only one that had your heart and he didn’t even know it. He never would.

Instead of focusing on that, or the cute way Lee’s cheeks went red after he took a shot, or how Lee spent a lot of time that night talking to Sakura, you took shots with Ino and Tenten and let Kiba buy you drinks and danced with Choji when he asked.

Overall, the night was going great. Everyone was having a good time and getting along and so far only Naruto had gotten just a little too drunk; everyone else was riding a nice buzz.

Shikamaru had just finished a less than enthusiastic rendition of “The Lazy Song” that had left everyone doubled over laughing at the irony. “Who should go next!?” Naruto yelled, looking around to see who still hadn’t sung a song.

And okay, maybe Naruto wasn’t the only one who had drank just a little too much. Watching Lee sit and laugh with Sakura the past hour had left you feeling just a tad bit jealous, leading you to drink more than you normally would. He’d barely said anything to you that, and the two of you were supposed to be friends.

“What’s so good about Sakura anyways? She’s really not that great.” You swished the liquid in your cup, mumbling the words you knew you would regret the next morning. Sakura had never been anything but nice to you; you knew she didn’t deserve to be the target of your jealousy.

Ino snickered. “Geez you’ve got it bad.” She commented with a roll of her eyes before hearing Naruto’s question. Her eyes lit up, and, grinning, she hurried to the microphone, looking through the book of songs available to sing. She flipped through for a moment or two before turning to Naruto and whispering something to him.

All of this escaped your attention as you were drowning in the misery of your own thoughts before you realized: everyone was chanting your name. You blinked, looking around to see everyone staring at you, pounding on tables and counters as they encouraged you to get up and sing.

Laughing, you shook your head nervously, not wanting to go embarrass yourself before Lee caught your eye. Even he was encouraging you to go up and perform. Well, if he wanted you to, then you would sing your heart out!

You downed two more shots before pushing to your feet, which was an obvious mistake.

The alcohol always hit hardest after you stood up.

“Woah, there.” Tenten laughed, standing to help you. Somehow, you made it to the stage. Naruto snickered as he passed you the microphone. He couldn’t wait to see this.

You held the microphone tightly in your hands as your eyes scanned the room with all your friends staring expectantly at you and cheering you on. You felt good. Really good. Your vision was blurry, head dizzy, stomach warm, and everything about you was giddy. It was your turn, and you were ready to make a statement.

Glancing at the screen, you saw the name of the song appear. Heart Attack by Demi Lovato.

“I’m gonna dedicate this song to someone very special to me,” You slurred into the microphone, giggling. Your friends in the crowd whooped and cheered as the music began.

“This one’s for you Lee!”

With that, you closed your eyes to block out the reactions of everyone and everything, and you sang. You sang your little heart out, put on the drunken performance of a lifetime. Your years of pent up feelings and nerves and fears surrounding Lee all went into that song.

As you sang the last word, you opened your eyes again, taking in everyone’s reaction. Glee, surprise, happiness. You were grinning; you’d killed it.

That was when your eyes landed on Lee. It was hard for you to gage his reaction. More than anything he looked… confused. And that was when the weight of what you’d just done settled on you. Oh shit.

You’d all but confessed your feelings for Lee… Drunkenly… In front of everyone.

The realization was all it took for you to sober up. Quickly, you shoved the microphone back into Naruto’s hands and fled the karaoke bar.

You weren’t really sure how you’d even made it home. Everything was kind of blurry. You remember running from the karaoke bar, a girl’s voice, probably Tenten’s, calling after you. You remember vomiting. A lot. That’s actually what you were doing now. You’d woken up with your head basically in the toilet.

You could have gone for some blissful moments where you didn’t remember what had caused you to sprint home from the bar, but alas, you couldn’t forget.

You’d confessed your years long crush through song.

How were you ever going to face Lee again?

You wouldn’t, you decided. You would spend the rest of your life in that house. You could have your groceries delivered, you weren’t going to need new clothes if you never went outside. You would just lay in your bed until you withered away into nothingness.

“You can’t stay in here forever,” Tenten rolled her eyes, tugging the blanket that you were hiding under off the bed.

“Watch me,” you whined in reply, holding a pillow over your head. “I totally embarrassed myself! He probably thinks I’m so lame!”

Tenten could only snicker at that. “Lee? Thinking you’re lame? Right.”

It took a bit of convincing, and you were basically kicking and screaming, but Tenten was able to drag you out of your home back into the real world. “No one’s going to care,” She assured you as the two of you walked. “We were all plastered. I’m sure no one will even remember!”

If only that were true.

“Hey!” Kiba called as he and Naruto approached you and Tenten. “Have you guys seen Lady Tsunade around here? I have this pain in my chest…”

Naruto grabbed Kiba’s arm in mock fear. ��Oh no! Kiba, are you having a heart attack!?”

The two of them doubled over in hysterics; tears were even streaming down their faces. You could feel your face burning red in embarrassment. You’d never wanted to disappear so badly.

“Beat it you two!” Tenten snapped, grabbing your arm and pulling you away. “Ignore them! They’re idiots!”

Head buried in your hands, you shook your head. “God! How am I ever going to live this down! I’m going home!” You pulled out of Tenten’s grip. “I’m going to move villages, change my name, and make sure Lee never sees my face again!”

“Uh, well, if that’s the case you better run…” Tenten said awkwardly, nudging you. “Because Lee’s coming this way…”

And there he was. In his green jumpsuit, bowlcut and all, Lee was heading straight for you. God you were sure you were going to vomit again.

“Good morning Tenten,” Lee greeted, though nowhere near in his usual upbeat tone. “Would you mind giving us a moment alone?” He asked. Tenten glanced over at you nervously.

“Yeah… Sure Lee…”

“I do not understand it, Sakura.” Lee sighed, toying with the drink in his hands as his eyes were locked on you drinking and laughing with Tenten and Ino. “I have never had any issue telling you that I think you are beautiful. But with her… It is different.”

Sakura giggled, feeling the drink in her own veins. “Because, Lee. You like her like her. You should just tell her!” Even drunk, Sakura would never betray your trust by telling Lee the obvious; that you liked him as much as he liked you. But it was infuriating to sit on both sides listening to the two of you cry over your feelings day after day and not tell you!

Lee shook his head, taking a gulp from his drink. “I cannot. I am not like Guy Sensei, as much as I try to be. I am not cool or good looking. I do not think I am smooth. I do not know how to talk to a girl I like.”

It took everything in Sakura not to burst out laughing. Guy Sensei? Cool? Good looking? Smooth?

“This is ridiculous. How much longer do I have to hear about how great you think she is before you finally tell her?!”

Rock Lee could barely hear Sakura; he was zoned in on you. Everything about you entranced Lee from the very first time he saw you trying to sneak out of his hospital room. You were beautiful, of course. Your hair always seemed to fall just right. Your smile brightened up a room. The kindness in your heart radiated from you. He loved how confident and outgoing you were and that you had an energy that could match his.

It wasn’t like Lee hadn’t tried to tell you before. There were plenty of times when it was just the two of you that he was tempted, but he could never get it out. There just weren’t many people that he connected so easily with. Guy Sensei was his idol; he wanted to be just like his sensei! But that wasn’t the same as having a friend. Even with his teammates, there was a level of professionalism to it all--maybe thanks to Neji--that kept him from feeling like he could truly be understood.

But with you, everything was so easy. Laughing came easily, talking and opening up about the things he struggled with… There was a naturalness to it he’d never experienced before. He was terrified to lose it.

So that night at the karaoke bar, he sat with Sakura whining about the same thing he had been for months now instead of doing something about it. That wasn’t like Lee at all, but that was what you did to him. You made him so nervous he couldn’t even be him.

He was sure you knew his eyes were locked on you all night, ogling like a total weirdo. He’d barely even talked to you. He had hoped that the alcohol would loosen him up and spur him into action, but he’d just shut down even more, causing him to wallow in his own self pity.

Why couldn’t he be more like Kiba? He was over there, so smooth and cool, grinning and chatting you up and buying you drinks. Lee wanted to be that guy to you!

“Oh, look! She’s gonna sing next!” Sakura nudged Lee, nodding at the stage where you were grasping the microphone. You were clearly inebriated, and the redness in your cheeks just made you look all the cuter to him.

“I’m gonna dedicate this song to someone very special to me!” Lee’s heart dropped into his stomach. He couldn’t even hope that he would be the one that you would devote a song to. So when it was his name that had left your mouth, he sat in there in a state of shock. It wasn’t even dawning on him. Sakura shook his shoulder excitedly as you belt out the lyrics to Heart Attack.

“Lee, she’s singing to you!”

It just couldn’t process. Was it the alcohol? Was it the absolute surprise at what was happening? Whatever it was, by the time you had finished, Lee had continued to stare at you, open mouthed. It was only when you’d sprinted out of the bar that Lee had come to his senses.

He’d done his best to follow you, but he was drunker than he thought and had stumbled around just a little too long. By the time he’d gotten himself straightened out, you were long gone.

He’d stayed up all night long thinking about it, thinking about you.

The whole night, he turned it over and over again in his mind; what else could that have meant other than you liked him back? It was too good to be true! But it was true? Lee drove himself mad.

The goal with his walk wasn’t necessarily to find you. Moreso, he had just wanted to clear his head, maybe get advice from Guy Sensei. But he’d ran into you and Tenten before he could do any of that.

As Tenten gave the two of you space, he stared at you bashfully. The longer the silence went on, the redder his cheeks became. Just as he was getting up the courage to say something, you broke the ice.

“Lee, look. About last night… I’m sorry. That was so embarrassing! I was just so drunk and… I wasn't thinking straight.” You were rambling on nervously, scratching the back of your head and avoiding his gaze, acting like you wanted to laugh the whole thing off.

Lee nodded slowly, letting your words sink in. So… He had misread the whole thing, then? The thought hit him like a blow to the stomach, taking the breath straight out of him. That sucked. “Right, of course!” He said quickly. “It is okay, really. I had drunk a lot as well!”

How did he get out of here? Lee was tempted to drop the weights from his ankles and take off running as fast as he could.

The discomfort was plain on his face, though. You knew Lee well; you could tell something was wrong.

You had to drop your playful facade. You felt like you’d really screwed things up. “Are… Are you mad at me?” You finally asked him quietly.

The question startled Lee. He frowned, tilting his head. “Why would I be upset with you? You are my friend.” You could only shrug helplessly. You were sad and embarrassed and confused, and now Lee was upset. Of course you thought it was your fault. You didn’t know that couldn’t be farther from the truth.

The silence was heavy, making you sigh and shake your head. “Well, uh, I should go meet up with Tenten again…” You mumbled, staring at the floor. After this, she definitely couldn’t drag you out of your bedroom again.

You lifted your hand, waving goodbye before turning away. You didn’t get more than a step away before Lee was grabbing your arm, his body reacting quicker than his mind. “Wait. Please.”

Of course you stopped, turning back to face him. You were too fearful to be hopeful, unwilling to get excited for something that wouldn’t happen, but you held your breath anyways as you stared up at him.

“I was not completely honest. I am upset, it is just not with you…” When you didn’t respond, only continued to stare at him with those earnest eyes, he had no choice but continue. He dropped your arm, his hand going to nervously rub at the back of his neck instead. He didn’t know how to do this, but he had the feeling it was now or never.

“The truth is, yesterday when you sang that song, and you said you were dedicating it to me, I believed it was because you had feelings for me. So just now, when you said you were not thinking straight, it made me upset because I have feelings for you. I was hoping that you would tell me that you felt the same…”

You didn’t think you’d ever seen Lee so red before. It was like a cartoon, the way it creeped up from his chin all the way to his forehead, shooting up like a thermometer. You could only imagine that you looked the same. Your face felt like it was on fire.

It took a moment for it all to sink in. There was a pause before it dawned on you; Lee just confessed that he had feelings for you! He liked you! The giddiness sent trembles through you as you broke out into a huge grin that you couldn’t stop.

“Lee, you idiot!” You laughed, smacking his arm. “I do like you! That’s the whole reason I humiliated myself in front of everyone yesterday!”

You know that look that Lee gets when he’s happy? His pupils dilate, glistening like googly eyes. The blush dusts the tops of his cheeks, he even gets a bit teary eyed.

All classic Lee and exactly what you got after your confession.

“I cannot believe it!” He cried, pulling you into a hug and twirling you around without hesitation. Now that he had confirmation about how you felt, any inhibitions he had been harboring were gone just like that. He wasn’t going to waste another moment not showing you exactly how he felt. “I have wanted to tell you for so long! I just did not think you felt the same way! This is fantastic!”

Lee’s enthusiasm was as contagious as ever. It didn’t take long before you were hugging Lee back and laughing along with him. When he finally calmed down, Lee released you, taking your hands in his instead and grinning at you.

“So does this mean you will go on a date with me?”

“Is that you asking me?” You giggled. Lee nodded enthusiastically. “Then yes; of course I will.”

Lee pulled you into another hug. “Would you like to know something?” He questioned, giggling childishly, so of course you nodded. “I almost had a heart attack asking you that question!”

The groan was immediate as you pulled away, smacking your forehead. “Lee!” You whined, cringing in embarrassment. “I am also having a heart attack trying to work up the nerve to do this…” For a guy that was so fast, he moved agonizingly slow as he leaned down to press his lips to yours. A heart attack, huh? Yeah, you were never going to live that down. But if this was the price to pay, well then, you didn’t mind all that much.

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theoriginalcarnivorousmuffin · 3 years

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So I was showing my sister your amazing Q-A posts, when I came across Peter's. I realized that you just keep mentioning the incompetence of the Order, and how they're just a bunch of babysitters who don't do anything throughout many posts, but never actually wrote a rant about them and their members. Can you do that, while stating all the things they did/didn't do and their uselessness to the Order? What can I say I love your rants!

Caveat that it has been a while since I’ve read books 5, 6, and 7 of Harry Potter. I have a fantastic memory but some things may slip my mind. If I grievously offend anyone and it turns out the Order does actually do something, anything, of any vague importance then feel free to let me know and shame me on the internet.

With that, the story of why I think the Order of the Phoenix is a ridiculous organization that was mostly there because Dumbledore felt the need to have a guerilla resistance group (you’ve got to have a guerilla resistance group! Or, if Tom has a secret cult, I must have one too! BUT WITH BIRDS! COO COO KACHOO TOM RIDDLE!)

First, let’s look at our lineup.

Yes, we have a few aurors in the midst, but even with them the lineup is... worrying. In the first war we knew that key figures had presumably just graduated Hogwarts and joined the Order (James and Sirius). For all we know, they were recruited even before graduation. This makes sense as James’ is a big financial win for Dumbledore and was probably, perhaps with Longbottom, in charge of funding most of their operations. That and he and Longbottom give Dumbledore a voice in the Wizengamot (which so far as I can surmise is the only real governing body in the country, the ministry exists, but it all boils down to the Wizengamot).

The point being, James, Sirius, Remus, Peter, and Lily are all barely squeaking out of Hogwarts not only when they join the Order but also even by the time they die. More, it could be because the books are from Harry’s point of view and he has a serious thing about worshipping James, but James in particular is made to sound very vital to the Order’s operations. A twenty-one-year-old who charged Voldemort without a wand (I really shouldn’t give James shit for this, it was a desperate situation, an attack they had not anticipated, he’s young, and panicking. I will still give James shit for this.)

Otherwise we have Mundungus Fletcher, who gives strong vibes of being an alcoholic and is just a generally unreliable, shady, dude who will steal your silverware and pawn it on the black market when you aren’t looking.

We have Molly and Arthur Weasley, whose only use I can possibly think of is being moral support and... I don’t know... providing safe houses maybe? Seriously, we have no indication they’re good at dueling (less so as Harry’s shocked when Molly takes on Bellatrix and miraculously wins). We know Arthur’s not a very intelligent guy. Arthur and Molly have no sense of... Well, suffice to say, if Dumbledore gave them any real information they’d run away screaming. They throw Percy out of the family for becoming Fudge’s secretary, I’m sure Dumbledore was just internally screaming and begging them not to do it so he can make Percy a spy. But he can never say as much as such a notion would horrify Molly and Arthur. Molly and Arthur are also presented as vital members of the Order by the way. Molly and Arthur. ARTHUR.

We have what remains of the Marauders in the second go around: Remus and Sirius. Remus, while a competent wizard, nobody can quite trust for the reason they couldn’t quite trust him last time: he’s still a werewolf and has no reason to support the current government. Sirius is recovering from ten years in hell and is in no condition to do anything, knows it, loathes it, and is clawing at the walls of the safehouse he was pretty much forced to provide the Order.

We then have the aurors. Kingsly seems competent enough but more than him we have Moody and we have Tonks. Tonks is young and seems very very green, she was a good enough duelist to get into the auror corps but we know she’s dreadfully clumsy and often seems to treat Order business as this very exciting super secret mission she’s on. Moody, is a paranoid wreck who is almost comical for his utterly ridiculous skepticism of everything and seems incapable of making any true plans or taking any real action.

Looking at the Order of the Phoenix is kind of like watching “Dodgeball”, you just have this really weird collection of people who try to dodge wrenches, only the Death Eaters aren’t much better, so it kind of evens out.

But onto why I think they do nothing... It’s because we see them do nothing.

We don’t get much information on the first war but at best it seems like there were a few minor skirmishes in the street now and then. I always imagine something like the Sharks and the Jets in Westside Story. They’re walking along the streets, spot each other, dramatic music ensues and a rumble begins, then they scamper away when the aurors come in.

Remember that these guys aren’t a legitimate organization and really don’t have the structure of one. Back in the day they were probably, essentially, a street gang.

We get a little more evidence of what we see them get up to in the later books. And it’s all just kind of sad.

Remus is sent on the world’s most ridiculous and hopeless quest to recruit werewolves. Why do I say ridiculous and hopeless, what the hell does Remus have to offer these guys? Werewolves are ridiculously oppressed by the current government, they cannot obtain an education, they cannot hold jobs, they’re desperately unemployed and people routinely talk about wiping them out. Remus comes up to them and says, “Hey guys, come support the guerilla movement that supports the government that talks about killing you all the time! It’ll be great!” They’ll either put Remus’ head on a pike or if they’re nice just laugh at him until he leaves. I’d say it’d be worth it, except that it’s an exceedingly dangerous task that probably would end with Remus’ head on a pike. As it is, it ends in embarrassing failure. And this is one of the more legitimate Order missions.

Hagrid, similarly, is sent to talk to the giants and it ends in equally embarrassing failure for the same reasons (why would the giants ever support the ministry and or Dumbledore who promises them nothing). Also, sending Hagrid to talk diplomacy, with anyone, ever. Surely, there’s no way that could possibly go wrong.

Otherwise their big task seems to be to babysit Harry and transfer him from the Dursleys to the Burrow/Grimmuald Place. The first, they fail at, Mundungus gets put on the job the one day something actually happens and it’s a complete disaster. The second, they also fail at, as I never understood why they couldn’t just portkey him where they needed him to go or at least closer by. The polyjuice flight across the sky was... really unecessary.

You can tell by the seriousness with which most Order members, i.e. Tonks, take the babysitting Harry duty that this is a very serious task for very serious people. Given this, Tom’s lack of overt action in the fifth and sixth books, the fact that we don’t seem to see them do anything even in the seventh book... Yeah, this and keeping an eye out for that prophecy are their most exciting jobs.

Remember that rescuing Harry from the Department of Mysteries wasn’t really Dumbledore’s idea. That was an emergency situation where he had to pull out the stops, more, I suspect Sirius went “CHAAAAAARGE” and gleefully rushed out into glorious battle with the Order directly behind him and Dumbledore going, “Well, shit.”

I guess the last thing I’ll say is that we also see that Dumbledore has very little confidence in the Order. He gives them nothing important to do and, more, gives them virtually no intelligence.

He never tells the Order about the horcruxes (their existence or Harry, Hermione, and Ron’s super serial mission to track them down and destroy them). He never relays to them that Harry himself is a horcrux. He never reveals the suicide ploy with Snape or that he was in fact dying before that point. He never reveals Malfoy’s assassination attempts. Dumbledore doesn’t tell them jack shit.

If he relies on anyone, usually when he’s forced to, it’s Severus Snape. This I think is not only because Snape is forced in a way to be loyal thanks to the life debt to Harry as well as his own overwhelming sense of guilt but also because he’s the only really intelligent and competent one there.

The Order’s just... if you need someone to pick up Harry or else keep an eye on him when Mrs. Figg is busy: they’re your guys. Otherwise, they make Dumbledore feel good about himself?

#ask #anon #the order of the phoenix #harry potter #headcanons

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spacecatchako · 3 years

Text

i don't want to be alone anymore (sfw)

you and daichi have been best friends since your first year of high school. now that you're in love (and adults) where will you go from here?

pairing: sawamura daichi x reader

wc: 3,373 words

contains: seemingly unrequited love, confessions, covers the nationals arc, friends to lovers, angst, hurt/comfort towards the end, fluff, reader literally has a breakdown and daichi comforts them, reassurance, cuddles, petnames (baby, princess, doll)

a/n: no, i didn't have any idea how to tag this. this fic is a little all over the place and there are several timeskips. the reader is implied to have issues w family and friends so keep that in mind lol. also i marked diff sections of the fic with ✨ this emoji so if u want to skip over certain parts and go straight to the hurt/comfort feel free babey

you were used to being lonely. sure, you worked hard and you had dreams, but there was some part you that remained unfulfilled. it was like a void that gradually dragged you down. you'd managed to supress it for most of your life up until high school, until all of a sudden something changed.

you met sawamura daichi. he was cute, a first year player on the volleyball team. daichi was kind to you. the two of you became fast friends after meeting on the first day at karasuno. during your breaks in between classes the pair of you would talk about anything and everything- volleyball strategies, your latest sketches, even other classmates that were giving you a hard time. you could be silly with daichi. there was no pressure with him, no need to pretend to be perfect.

but there was something scary about this too. by your second year of school you'd been friends with daichi for about a year. it was then that the realization hit- you had never felt this safe, this accepted, or... this loved by another person. when you'd get anxious because of classes or have issues with your family daichi became a shoulder for you to lean on. he'd go out of his way to send you check up texts and leave you little handwritten notes. the first one that you received was a little post-it note that said "you'll do great on your test today! i believe in you- daichi." he'd blushed like crazy when you confronted him about it. it was new to see your usually sturdy and level-headed best friend blush over a silly note that he'd left. there was something different between the two of you after that first note. instead of walking you home like usual he started to keep a hand on the small of your back.

you hadn't been looking. you'd been talking about how awkward your family was when a stray cat slunked into front of the two of you. you almost walked straight into it before the cat bounded away, crossing the empty street and looking back once to meow at daichi and you.

"sorry, is that too much? i just... want to make sure that you don't trip."

you were confused until you realized what had happened. daichi had steadied you by putting his hand on the small of your back. it felt good, for some reason, to trust him to steady you. trust wasn't an easy thing to come by.

you smiled a tad awkwardly before steadying yourself on your own two feet. "not at all daichi. i don't mind."

daichi smiled and the pair of you kept walking. his hand had stayed where it had been. you felt... guilty for being so touch-starved. and for your best friend, of all people?

"how ridiculous" you thought to yourself. when you came home you knew that no one was there. time to start dinner before your family came home. you'd probably retreat to your room and text daichi when that happened.

daichi was so good and so nice, and by your third year of high school the tiny, lingering bit of attraction that you had had for him flourished into a full-blown crush. you felt embarrassed and guilty. never had you let someone get this close to you. never had you ever let anyone write you notes, check in on you, give you genuine-sounding compliments. it was the little things like "are you okay y/n? you seemed a little quiet this morning. are you getting enough sleep?"

graduation came and went. the notion of parting with daichi and your other friends- asahi, suga, and kiyoko- left a pang of grief in your stomach. you were attending a local university and daichi planned to join miyagi's fire department after nationals. you'd still be close to him and he'd still be living at home, but it was weird to think that you'd be seeing one another a lot less.

nationals was when everything boiled over. you'd promised daichi that you'd be in the stands at every game of the competition, cheering him on.

"id love it if you were there, don't get me wrong. but don't feel like you have to jump through hoops for me! it's a bit of a long trip, i don't want you tiring yourself out." he confesses sheepishly. but you really wanted to go- his mom and siblings couldn't because of school and work, but they'd given him their best wishes.

"I'll hitch a ride with saeko and the crew. she and i work at the same restaurant on the weekends. we already talked and she said she'd be more than happy." you chirp. daichi seems a bit less worried about you after this, but then he remembers.

"um. y/n. you know that saeko drives... well, not badly, just... scarily?" he only seems to be partially joking.

you laugh at his worried expression. "I'll be okay pal. we'll make one of saeko's taiko buddies take the wheel."

daichi mock sighs in relief and you laugh together. this was the last moment that daichi had before nationals where he wasn't laden with anticipation over whether karasuno would succeed or not. he felt relaxed, with you. he thought you were cute, and awkward sometimes, and smart, and... good. so good. you didn't always look to him like he was an authority figure and you were small. he didn't feel the pressure to make sure you behaved or kept you in line because you were good at putting up a front and keeping yourself "in order." sometimes daichi wished that you would let him take care of you, let him listen more often. he wished that you would let him love you.

oh.

oh shit.

"daichi? um, daichi?"

daichi blushed and was snapped back to reality. he... loved you? that's what that care for you was all of these years. that's why he wanted to know if you were taking care of yourself, if you weren't burning yourself out with pleasing your family and school and work. sure, he thought you were cute. he picked up on all of your idiosyncrasies, even sometime pointing them out to you. he had had an inkling that *maybe* he had a little crush on you... but the care that he had come to find that he had for you was so great. he had to do something- everyone was leaving for school and the championships would be over and then when would he see you again? there was this great, big fear of losing you due to confessing. but that fear was minuscule compared to you, his studious and independent friend, pushing him away and forgetting.

"sorry. i was just lost in thought."

✨

yes, you, saeko, and the taiko group arrived a *tad* late and missed the tokonami match. yes you felt guilty for missing it. but when karasuno won against inarizaki and you saw daichi and the team celebrate the win, it was all worth it. you cheered as loud as you can, and once the players cleared from the court, you scrambled to greet daichi.

you see him in the lobby and almost leap into his arms. he laughs. "aaa, hey y/n." he croaks.

you giggle. "hey daichi. congratulations. you were amazing out there."

he's smiling through the sweat and fatigue. you notice, out of the corner of your eye, asahi and suga slowly backing away to leave the two of you alone. suga clicks his tongue, making daichi whip his head around, and he gives the captain a thumbs up." daichi sighs and sets you down, and the two of you are left in the stadium lobby. volleyball players and spectators mingle around, getting food and shopping for merchandise. daichi runs a hand through his hair and turns to you.

"do you want to go outside? there's something that i have to tell you."

anxiety shoots through you. if it's daichi, it can't be bad. of course not. that's one of your best friends. right?

the two of you make your way to the front doors of the stadium and get some fresh air. the sky is blue and the wind is refreshing against your skin. daichi, still sweaty and tired from his game, seems to enjoy it too.

you giggle as he stretches. daichi sits on a nearby bench and gestures for you to do so too. you notice a little shake in his hands as he does so. he's fiddling with the zipper of his karasuno jacket in that cute way that you know he does.

there's a sense of unease, and it's up to you to break the silence. you're alone with sawamura daichi, your best friend and longtime crush.

"daichi? what's wrong?" you ask, concerned.

daichi looks to you, a flush on his cheeks and a light in his eyes. he looks so cute, even when he's tongue-tied and tired from a game.

he takes a deep breath, and the words come out.

"i like you a lot, y/n"

you blink, confused. then it hits you. your crush, sawamura daichi, likes you. like, the boy that you think about way too much, the boy that you feel safe with, the absolute gentleman who cares about you and respects you instead of walking all over you, likes you.

you realize that you haven't said anything before you stutter.

"i-i like you too, daichi. so much."

he's blushing. your face is growing hot despite the winter air. the two of you, literal adults, are reduced to awkward messes because of this confession.

"o-oh. that's... good. i think that that's good." daichi awkwardly says. he laughs a little, then it turns into a full-blown bellow. you can't help but laugh too at how ludicrous the situation is. two friends who have known each other for years, caring about each other, eventually falling for each other. who knew?

"also suga made a bet and told me to confess to you if we won against inarizaki. he told me after the tokonami match. i agreed." daichi huffs after the laughter subsides.

"of course he did. im glad that he did it though." you joke.

"yeah. because then i wouldn't have you." he smiles, getting up. he extends a hand to you, helping you from the bench

"let's go back to the group. i don't want to miss lunch."

✨

it's been months after nationals. you and daichi are in a relationship, happy to be with one another. he's taken you on so many wonderful dates and his family seems to love getting to know you more. but there's still something that's missing. you've always struggled to open up to people completely. even daichi doesn't know what you're like when you completely break.

that changes one day when you have to travel from your dorm, to your parents house, then to daichi's for a date. it was supposed to be casual- just you and him in your pajamas, watching movies and eating takeout. but after being berated by your family for your career choice it triggered something in you. you felt like a little kid again, being told that you're not enough, being slowly manipulated by your family into burning yourself out. dachi helped the loneliness subside, but you knew that, inside, you were still the same little kid. that thought made something inside you recoil, but you pushed it down and made your way to daichi's.

you settle into his bed, your partner beside you. you take a good look at him- your man, sturdy and stronger from work at the fire department. suddenly, you can't help but break for some reason. tears flood your eyes and they won't stop for some reason.

"baby? baby what's wrong?"

you didn't deserve him. why were you even friends with him? someone this nice, this gentle with you, this kind? you wanted him to kick you out for crying. you wanted him to break up with you, because good things don't last.

you were so embarrassed and you'd felt so weak and stupid. you'd never been allowed to cry before, you'd always been told that it was a sign of weakness. good children didn't cry, so now that you were grown up you shouldn't either.

daichi hadn't judged you. he just set the tv remote down and moved in to hug you. other people's touches usually made you flinch and swat them away, but it was never like that with him. not when he supported the small of your back when you fell, not when you jumped into his arms, not when he took your hand after your mutual confession.

the two of you were hugging now, your chin on his shoulder and his head tucked into your side. you could stay like this forever. he was so warm. you could feel the two of your heartbeats almost sinking into one as your sobs quieted down and your breathing slowed to normal. this was the effect that he had on you. it was in this moment that you realized that you loved him- you truly did. the brown-eyed, sturdy, kind, careful, gentle boy that you'd met on the first day of high school had become your friend. then he was your crush. now that you two were adults, he was your first partner. the first person that you had ever fallen truly, deeply in love with.

you felt weak for desiring a love that was this tender. pessimistic you has you thinking that maybe all of the bad things that happened when you were growing up- your family being distant, friends leaving, you feeling alone all of the time- were a sign. a sign that you didn't deserve love. but if you were undeserving, if the pessimistic side of you was right, maybe you could have this moment to keep instead. is that it? if a whirlwind kind of love was too much to ask, you could just keep these moments with daichi close to your heart. if it was possible to take this feeling and keep it in a bottle, you would.

in between sobs, you vent.

"everything sucks, daichi. my family has always been so critical of me. i never get to see any of our friends anymore. im trying to succeed at school but my family won't get off my back. i feel so alone."

daichi pulls away to look at you. his palm is cupping your face and uses his thumb to wipe a tear away. you sniffle. you struggle to meet his beautiful brown eyes, averting your gaze. but you can feel his gaze on you, and when you do finally find the courage to make eye contact, he looks at you with nothing but affection. for some reason you don't feel judged by him. you don't feel... bad for crying in front of him anymore. he's looking at you with nothing but acceptance, nothing but care.

"hey." he starts in a small, gentle voice. "i know how you feel about crying, doll. but it's okay to cry. no matter what your parents say about you, you're a good person. a lovely person, even. you're a good friend too. what they think is stupid." he smiles a little. you love that smile- the way that his eyes crinkle a little and his cheeks dimple. he holds one of your hands in both of his. "i love you. you're good, and smart, and kind, and hardworking. you forget to take care of yourself sometimes, but i think that that's okay. while you're learning how to show yourself more compassion I'll take care of you in the meantime. whatever you need, doll. you're safe with me. no matter what. okay?"

you're crying again. great. you don't stop yourself this time and you throw yourself into his arms. he's there, waiting for you. you let yourself sob into his chest while he gently rubs your back. he holds you in his big, strong arms and hugs you closer. you don't feel suffocated and you don't feel humiliating to be crying. you feel safe. it sucks to cry over what your family thinks of you and it sucks that you don't feel like enough. it sucks that you've felt alone for most of your life. it sucks that you feel guilty for wanting love and it sucks that sometimes, you feel guilty for loving daichi so much. but as he holds you and presses a kiss to the top of your head, nuzzling your hair, all of the pain is tinged with something warm. something safe. something so, so safe. a feeling that you'd never felt before.

it's in that moment that you know- daichi isn't a whirlwind. he isn't a storybook prince that will whisk all of your problems away. no, he's somehow better. he's a pillar of support, a source of comfort, a prince in his own right. no, he won't save you- you still have to take care of yourself. but he'll support you, fill in the gaps, love you unconditionally. maybe a fix-it-all is too much to ask, but you couldn't care less about that now. all that you want his daichi. he takes care of you. he respects you. he loves you, despite your flaws and your feelings of weakness and those moments like now when you just need to be held. he loves you.

when you've stopped crying your voice is croaky and you feel gross. you look up at daichi and he hands you a box of tissues from the nightstand. you're an ugly crier, you know that. but daichi doesn't seem to judge as you dab at your eyes and look to check your reflection in his room mirror. it feels wrong to leave the comfort of his arms, but it also feels like instinct to check your composure. when you're done you turn around to face him, eyes tired.

"do you want to talk about it doll?" you're about to object, in a prefunctory sort of way, but he cuts in. "baby, i don't mind. really. i just want to know that you're okay. i just want to know that you feel safe. you've endured a lot and the way that you feel matters."

you sniffle. "im fine not talking for now daichi. im... tired. just tired. from crying. i just want to sleep." when he shows you nothing but understanding, you stutter out one last request

"ww-will you hold me?"

"of course, princess. ive got you."

you clamber back to bed. daichi and you shift positions so that he's laying down and you're against his chest. he smells like that nice, crisp soap that he always uses. you bury your face in his chest once more, before laying on your side to the sound of his heartbeat.

you sigh. "i love this sound. it lets me know that you're here with me. it let's me know that you're real."

daichi chuckles warmly. you can hear the sound reverberate throughout his chest and it tickles your ear. he's so sweet. it's then that he promises something to you.

"im here, darling. and i am not going anywhere."

your eyes water a little at that. "i love you, daichi. you're my best friend."

he sighs, and it's like you can feel his warm, gentle smile from where you're resting. "i love you too, doll. so much. you are the most precious thing in the world to me."

you know in that moment that you are loved- genuinely, indellibly loved. the roughness and loneliness that you once endured is no more. despite everything, you're learning how to love yourself and to take care of yourself. it feels so, so lonely sometimes and the work seems endless. but whenever you need someone to catch you when you fall, you know that your love, daichi, will be there. forevermore.

his heartbeat relaxes you as you snuggle deeper into his chest. the last words that the two of you utter to one another are ones of love before you both drift off to sleep. you love him- so, so much. and he loves you.

tagging some folks in the longest fic that ive ever written because aaaaaa. if u want to be added to my taglist or taken off plz send me an ask!

@ceo-of-daichi @honeybunny-sawamura @daichis-kitty @goldenshoyo @daichidaichidaichi @kingtamakimurder

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latte-fairytaekwoon · 3 years

Text

𝚈𝚊𝚗𝚍𝚎𝚛𝚎! 𝙰𝚝𝚎𝚎𝚣 𝙿𝚛𝚘𝚏𝚒𝚕𝚎𝚜: 𝙹𝚞𝚗𝚐 𝚆𝚘𝚘𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚗𝚐

Disclaimer: In no way am I condoning, promoting, encouraging, justifying nor romanticizing yandere behavior or lifestyle. This is all a work of fiction and not meant to represent real life scenarios.

Warnings: Mentions of toxic relationships, yandere behavior, bullying, harassment, blackmail, sexual scenes, abusive relationship, manipulation, verbal abuse, abortion, attempted murder.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

𝐁𝐚𝐬𝐢𝐜 𝐈𝐧𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧:

𝙽𝚊𝚖𝚎: 𝙹𝚞𝚗𝚐 𝚆𝚘𝚘𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚗𝚐

𝙳.𝙾.𝙱: 𝙽𝚘𝚟𝚎𝚖𝚋𝚎𝚛 𝟸𝟼𝚝𝚑, 𝟷𝟿𝟿𝟿

𝙷𝚎𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝: 𝟷𝟽𝟹 𝙲𝙼/ 𝟻'𝟾 𝙵𝚝.

𝙰𝚐𝚐𝚛𝚎𝚜𝚜𝚒𝚘𝚗 𝙻𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚕: ■■■■■100%

𝙾𝚋𝚜𝚎𝚜𝚜𝚒𝚘𝚗 𝙻𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚕: ■■■■□90%

𝙼𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚊𝚕 𝙸𝚗𝚜𝚝𝚊𝚋𝚒𝚕𝚒𝚝𝚢: ■■■■□80%

𝙾𝚟𝚎𝚛𝚊𝚕𝚕 𝚃𝚑𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚝 𝙻𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚕: 𝙷𝚒𝚐𝚑

𝚈𝚊𝚗𝚍𝚎𝚛𝚎 𝙲𝚕𝚊𝚜𝚜𝚒𝚏𝚒𝚌𝚊𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗: 𝚃𝚘𝚛𝚖𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚘𝚛

𝙱𝚎𝚑𝚊𝚟𝚒𝚘𝚛𝚊𝚕 𝙰𝚗𝚊𝚕𝚢𝚜𝚒𝚜:

𝙰𝚋𝚒𝚕𝚒𝚝𝚢 𝚝𝚘 𝚙𝚎𝚛𝚏𝚎𝚌𝚝𝚕𝚢 𝚖𝚊𝚜𝚔 𝚑𝚒𝚖𝚜𝚎𝚕𝚏 𝚊𝚜 𝚊 𝚕𝚘𝚟𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚜/𝚘.

𝚃𝚑𝚛𝚒𝚟𝚎𝚜 𝚘𝚏𝚏 𝚙𝚊𝚒𝚗 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚜𝚞𝚏𝚏𝚎𝚛𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚘𝚏 𝚘𝚋𝚓𝚎𝚌𝚝 𝚘𝚏 𝚒𝚗𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚎𝚜𝚝 .

𝚄𝚜𝚎𝚜 𝚋𝚕𝚊𝚌𝚔𝚖𝚊𝚒𝚕 𝚊𝚜 𝚖𝚎𝚊𝚗𝚜 𝚝𝚘 𝚐𝚎𝚝 𝚠𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚑𝚎 𝚍𝚎𝚜𝚒𝚛𝚎𝚜.

𝙳𝚎𝚜𝚙𝚒𝚜𝚎𝚜 𝚠𝚑𝚎𝚗 𝚘𝚋𝚓𝚎𝚌𝚝 𝚘𝚏 𝚒𝚗𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚎𝚜𝚝 𝚛𝚎𝚏𝚞𝚜𝚎𝚜 𝚝𝚘 𝚘𝚋𝚎𝚢.

𝙽𝚘𝚝 𝚊𝚋𝚘𝚟𝚎 𝚒𝚗𝚏𝚕𝚒𝚌𝚝𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚙𝚑𝚢𝚜𝚒𝚌𝚊𝚕 𝚙𝚊𝚒𝚗.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

You had known him for the longest time, probably since you were both learning the alphabet.

Even back then he was a troublesome boy.

Loved to dip your hair in paint, pour glue inside your backpack.

Or always pushed you off the swings cause he wanted to play in it.

This didn't really faze you back then.

Most of the boys that age played such tricks on almost all the girls.

They all had a specific target and you were Wooyoung's.

You remember telling this one day to your mom, who simply chuckled.

"Honey, boys tend to tease the girls they have a crush on."

You remember looking at her with confusion.

How could they treat someone they like with such utter disrespect and rudeness?

"Because they don't know how to express their feelings."

Like an idiot you believed that, and being the naive little girl you were, you kinda started developing a crush on him.

You remember the first time you talked back to him, it's engraved in your head because it was the first time of many to come where his words, and actions, hurt you.

"Just admit you like me Wooyoung! You only tease me cause you're in love with me."

You remember the rage and disgust in his eyes as he shoved you to the ground, making you scrape your knee on the pavement.

"Get this through that dumb brain of yours Y/N....

No one will ever love a dirty little rat like you."

You came home crying that day. Hurt physically and emotionally at his words.

And the years to come weren't better, as you grew up, Wooyoung's bullying towards you escalated.

You hoped that after you graduated high school and started going to university, you'd be free from him, never see him again.

You could finally be happy for once in your life. Focus on your goals and career.

Everything was going great for you!.......

Until you walked into class and found out not only had Wooyoung been accepted to the same university...

He was majoring in the same field as you!

"Hey dirty little rat. Missed me?"

His cocky smile sent shivers down your spine, you were already fearing what he had in store for you.

If you thought high school was hell, it was nowhere near as awful as the torment Wooyoung was now putting on you.

Tripping you down the stairs to the point you had severe injuries.

Writing nasty and derogatory names on your desk that now wouldn't come off and you'd be forced to look at every time you went to class.

One time he went as far as stealing your assignments, ultimately leading to failing an entire semester.

You were so heartbroken and just done with his shit. You felt no more motivation to even continue studying.

Until a cute boy named Yeonjun transferred and took an interest in you.

He was super nice, friendly and not to mention good looking and hella tall.

It was more than obvious too that he wanted establish a relationship with you, anyone and everyone could see that.

Especially Wooyoung and he did not look the way someone else was making you happy.

So he devised a plan, not caring how messed up it was.

He made sure someone convinced you to go to a party he'd be at.

You found it odd that he was suddenly acting super nice to you, not even calling you those mild nicknames he called you in front of others.

And it shocked you even more when he suddenly apologized to you for everything he'd done to you, even offering to talk to your professor about your assignment.

His eyes seemed so sincere, you actually believed him.

Perhaps he finally decided to change, realized his behavior was unnecessary and immature and of course, like an idiot you accepted his apology.

You got wasted for the first time in your life that night and could not remember anything at all.

Until Wooyoung was 'kind' enough to brief you in on what happened.

He pulled out his phone and made you watch a video he had filmed of you two that night.

Your stomach hurled over as you realized it was a fucking sex tape, you and Wooyoung had actually fucked that night.

"What! No no! This couldn't have happened! There's no way!" You refused to believe it.

Wooyoung just smirked at you.

"Oh but it did happen kitten. You were so eager too as the video displays, you kept asking me to go harder, begging me for another round and wanting my cum all over you..."

"I wonder what would the whole school say if I posted it online....especially Yeonjun."

Now you realized what his game was. He was never sorry. It was just another form of him to torture you, and this tipped the scale.

You were so shaken up, you got down on your knees and begged him not to show anyone the video.

"Please Wooyoung! I'll do anything! Anything!"

"Anything?......really? How about becoming mine then?"

And now you were forever tied to your worst nightmare.

Wooyoung especially enjoyed seeing Yeonjun's disappointed and heartbroken look when he announced that you two were now dating.

Now he couldn't even look at you anymore, feeling somewhat betrayed by your actions.

You wanted to tell him you were sorry and explain to him what was going on, but Wooyoung had eyes on you 24/7.

He even made you move in with him and now even your free time had to be spent with him.

You hated living with him.

He not only made sure to verbally abuse you, but actually seemed to have fun causing tiny accidents to happen around you.

His favorite was when he'd peer over your shoulder as you tried to study.

He scoffed. "Why even bother if all you'll ever be good at is spreading your legs?"

Those were his favorite insults: "whore" "slut" "bitch".

One time you were just so fed up with him, that you ended up snapping back.

"Shut the fuck up Wooyoung! You're such an insufferable piece of shit, no wonder your mom left you and your dad back in middle school."

As soon as the words came out, you wanted to swallow them back in.

Wooyoung was livid at your words.

He not only yanked you up by your hair, but he actually threw you to the floor and started kicking you harshly.

He didn't kick you for too long though, he did not want to risk anyone questioning when he told them you fell down the stairs.

And especially not take you to the hospital.

You had no choice but to stay home as you tried to recuperate.

You remember one of those days, you came home from a quick trip to the convenience store and found some girl blowing Wooyoung on the couch.

You weren't fazed. He often brought girls home and fucked them right in front of you.

You just sighed and decided to ignore the shit eating grin he'd give you whenever you caught him.

You decided long ago it wasn't worth it.

You two weren't even dating cause you wanted to.

He just loved controlling you, having power over you, holding something over your head.

He had this obsessive need to make you miserable.

And you hated that you had no choice but to allow it.

Even when there were things you didn't want to do, you had to or he'd once again blackmail you.

The one time you adamantly refused to was when you found out you were pregnant.

Wooyoung was just as shocked as you.

"And you're telling me I'm the father?"

"Uh......I can't have sex with anyone who isn't you, obviously you're the father."

Wooyoung couldn't let you go through with the pregnancy.

"Get rid of it." He told you.

You wrapped a protective hand around your bump.

"No! This is my baby and I won't allow you to harm it!"

You weren't going to budge though.

"Show the tape to everyone! I don't give a fuck anymore! But I'm not killing an innocent child who has done nothing wrong. "

Realizing he was losing control of you, Wooyoung knocked you out unconscious, deciding to take matters into your own hands.

You woke up a day later, feeling sore and aching in your inner thighs and lower abdomen.

You immediately panicked and sensed something was wrong.

You didn't need Wooyoung to tell you, you knew he had taken you to a clinic and had the baby removed.

You were so shaken up, cried your eyes out and no longer had any will to fight against Wooyoung.

You felt like it all all your fault, the death of your baby was your fault.

You weren't strong enough to save it and it was killing you inside.

You no longer trusted anyone, and you didn't have the heart to talk about it to anyone. Not like they'd believe you or care about you.

But someone did notice, Yeonjun never stopped caring about you and although he was hurt you went with someone else, he still had feelings for you.

And he was very observant and noticed that ever since you started dating Wooyoung, you were skipping a lot of classes....

And you were having a lot of accidents...too many in fact.

And now he just saw you completely lost and like a walking dead.

"Hey Y/N, are you ok?" He asked you one day.

You were going to respond, but the devil made an appearance by your side.

"She's fine and was just coming home with me. Weren't you baby?"

To everyone, it looked like a sweet and caring smile from your doting boyfriend, but you knew it was all fake.

Nonetheless you just kept your head low and went home with him.

Yeonjun noticed the way you trembled when he put his arm around you, noticed the frightened look in your eyes and he knew something was wrong in your relationship.

When you got home, Wooyoung was pissed off at you and immediately struck your face.

"I thought I told you not to talk to him! Can't you obey a simple order you fucking bitch?!"

When he pulled out a knife from the kitchen, you were now scared for your life.

You tried to fight back, but Wooyoung was stronger than you and you were still in pain after the abortion.

He knocked you to the floor and managed to land 2 stab wounds into your right side.

You could never forget the wrath and hate in his eyes as he told you:

"I'm going to fucking kill you."

By some miracle, someone taller and stronger than Wooyoung got him off you, that someone being none other than Yeonjun.

He felt glad about following his hunch and followed you both back home, otherwise he'd end up reading about you in the newspaper.

He had no trouble in subduing Wooyoung and calling the police.

The only thing on his mind was getting you to the hospital as soon as possible.

"It's ok Y/N. You're going to be fine." He assured you

Your physical injuries were easy to recover from, but the emotional trauma and abuse Wooyoung put you through was not.

Yet Yeonjun was there every step of the way, going with you to therapy and just listening to you and your terrifying story.

For the first time in your life, you felt truly loved and happy....

And safe.

A year after the ordeal, you were doing much better and were nearly fully recuperated.

Yeonjun and you rented a place together and were completely in love with each other.

Everything seemed to be going perfect....

And then one day your phone rang.

Picking up, you asked "Hello?"

"Don't think it's over yet you dirty little rat."

272 notes · View notes

eulchu · 3 years

Note

listen i fully agree with you. twitter is just a cesspool and it's best for people (not just creators, the fans too) stay off of it tbh. I'm not gonna pretend dream is perfect, but he sure isn't the person the internet makes him out to be. Controlling 23 million people that have just introduced themselves to you in the past year is literally impossible. I do like how the trend today, however, is trying to be used to lift up black creators. That's the best use I've seen of one of those things ever. The rest of it is just gross. And the situation with Karl genuinely upsets me. The boy didn't do anything. Literally the internet just wanted to bully an energetic, neurodivergent dude because he's not exactly what they want him to be. When they couldn't find anything he actually said that would be "canceleable", they made him answer for other people's actions and made up conspiracy theories. I can tell Karl is super sensitive to the way he can affect people and the idea of hurting someone is probably his worst nightmare, so I was (and am) genuinely worried for him. He gets shit no matter where he goes. I feel like Dream at least has a pretty solid support system. I'm just worried Karl may not have the same thing. (Sorry for the long message, I just wanted to talk about this a little lol)

ohh where do i start!

1. dream is flawed! and there's nothing wrong with admitting it. everyone is. i'm not gonna lie, you know i haven't been into the dreamsmp for the longest time but from what i can see i really admire his eagerness to do better and apologize for the things he's done wrong VERY thoroughly (mostly. once he's cooled down. he's not very good at dealing with confrontation). i'm not gonna pretend that i know everything that's been going on since he rose to fame nor am i a black person NOR know enough american culture to understand the correlation between his tweet and the (unintentional??) racist undertone, but i will say that today crossed a line, overall. i agree it was nice to see the poc cc threads (that's the only good thing that happened today) but man...

not only as a neordivergent person but also (as of right now, days away from graduating) a psych student, the hate and harassment he got for the "normal pills" is ridiculous. i'm not gonna get into it because i could write another whole essay about it, so all i'm gonna say is: ridiculous. and from what i've seen that's usually how it goes? same thing with the pride merch! he only did it because his fans asked for it. he has the Trevor project permanently linked to his sm accs. he's donating a shitton of money and people still tried (and ARE trying) to cancel him because his intentions are "fishy". everything he does has to get twisted into something that wasn't inherently hurtful.

and god don't even get me started on the doxxing and harassment and body shaming.... and people making a joke out of it because it's just so fucking funny! isn't it? i'm glad he's taking a break. i would've quitted everything months ago.

2. about the karl situation, this is an interesting one - you see, the first member of the dsmp i took notice of was mr karl jacobs! unlike w the rest of the dsmp, i've known karl waaay before christmas. i always had a spot for him, back when i only knew him through corpse's videos. you can imagine how that's amplified since i found out he's part of the feral boys. it was actually videos of a call between tina and karl that caught my attention and eventually led me to a lot of dsmp recs. honestly? i kinda hate that karl's lowest moment was what made me notice this whole community.

i cannot stress how awful i feel about this whole situation. and all for what? to this day i still don't know what made people be so goddamn horrible and mean to the kid. i knew almost nothing about him, except that he was friends with corpse and had met up with sapnap, and i remember when i heard about all the awful things that had been said to him on stream i went on a rage rampage and turned into the control police in yt comments. it just... doesn't compute. people kept saying 'stop saying this karl stops eating when this happens' and everyone??? went 'good'???? what the fuck? how can you sleep at night knowing you destroyed someone's mental health. i was so worried i even sent him a dm on instagram. i don't send dms. ever.

i get what you mean about the support system and yeah, i feel like dream has a big thing going on with sapnap and george? like everyone's close with everyone of course but i feel like the three are ride or die. i do however think that for karl, that's sapnap too. just based off on his personality and his relationship with karl, i like to think that he's a very strong support system for karl too.

overall i'm so glad i got to know them and i love their content but i really really wish someone would get them off the internet. they're gonna be ruined by 25 if people keep it up.

#long ask you say :) may i interest you in a long answer #i'm sorry i totally ranted my way through this #dreamwastaken #karl jacobs #dream neg #karl neg #eating disorder tw #ask #kraken45

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syinisuga · 3 years

Text

Begin Again [MinYoongi]

Pairing : Yoongi x Reader

Word count : 5.2K

Genre : Fluff and Angst

Description : Friends to lovers, Long Distance relationship, Lovers to (?)

Summary : when you thought the friendship you once had with him died away after one silly mistake, and you thought you would never have again what you lost;

But it blossoms back unexpectedly stronger and is slowly growing to be something more beautiful than you ever had

"I've been spending the last eight months thinking all love ever does is break and burn, and end;

But on a Wednesday in a cafe i watched it Begin Again"

--------------------✨📖✨---------------------

It was the start of a new year and you weren't particularly happy about being moved up a few classes into an entirely new class with relatively new students you haven't personally met yet. You were still grateful for your good results in the past year to have you land in such a good class. In all honesty though, you did miss your friends from your old class, all of them being scattered in the back classes however changed your mind about being thankful that you're at least in a better one. The first few days of getting used to the classes went by rather slowly as you were listening to the introductions of the other students and teachers half mindedly, till around your 4th day into the classes that is.

You were randomly seated in the Chemistry lab by the teacher as she familiarised herself with the rest of the class. Not paying much attention you were spacing out, resting your chin on your palm, tapping away at your cheek.

" Um, hey there"

The voice from the stool next to you spoke. You turned your head to the direction of the voice, being met with warm brown eyes looking right at you. He had soft black hair, eyes slightly puffy as if he hadn't slept well the night before, lips curled up in a slight smile as he looked at you.

"Oh, hello"

you answered, trying not to sound overly shocked at the first human interaction you've had in this new class.

"I'm yoongi, what's your name?"

"I'm y/n, nice to meet you Yoongi"

"So what are your interests? What do you like to do y/n? Any hobbies?"

It definitely took you by surprise when this boy you've never really met before was suddenly making an interest to get to know you more. Something about him felt raw and not shy but in a good way.

"Well i really love listening to music and i do indulge in art as well. Spend most of my time listening to songs while drawing. Draw the mood of the song you know?"

"Damn, haha you sound kinda like me. Not tryna be cheesy or anything but i love listening to music too, I'm shit at drawing tho, i can barely draw a stickman"

Both of you exchanged a little chuckle at his open confession about himself. And even though it had only been a few minutes of words between the two of you, you felt at that moment that he wasn't like the other boys who popped up to talk to you first. This one genuinely seemed interested in you just to make a new friend.

-----------------------🤝------------------------

"Yo y/n you wanna ditch PE and hang out in the library? The new Resident Evil movie came out we can watch"

"You know what, yeah let's yeet"

You don't know how it went from spending lunch times together, to skipping the most boring subjects to hang out and hide. It'd been a few months since you started your new friendship with Yoongi, and by now you were known as the inseparable duo, funny enough both of you became the class representatives. Somehow you two got closer and closer each day, the more you talked the more you felt like you've known each other for years, yet some part of you knew that there was more to Yoongi than he was showing to you.

On a particularly slow day at your classes, you and Yoongi had pre planned to sneak out to hang out at your usual spot in the library. Sitting at the back of the library the both of you laughed at a joke Yoongi made about how almost the whole school shipped the both of you.

"You know y/n, I envy you"

"Oh well, I know I'm fabulous" you playfully said as you flipped your hair back, earning a little grunt and a harmless eye roll from Yoongi.

"It's not that you loonatic, i envy you...cause you have such a nice relationship with your family"

His sudden statement caught you slightly off guard but you gave him a look, clearly eager to know the reason behind his words. Flashing half a smile towards you he starts his story.

"Growing up for me was, well, it was an experience. I grew up under the care of foster parents who constantly reminded me that my parents gave me away cause i was a burden, all my life that's what i was told. Never had a father figure or mother figure to help shape my emotions? Guess that's why I don't show it if I'm sad or depressed, which is actually most of the time"

he looks down at his hands and chuckles softly.

"But you know something y/n? Being with you makes me feel like I could be myself, like I don't have to be afraid of being judged. And that's why I wanted you to know the truth but i understand if you don't wanna get involved or-"

You cut him off by placing your hand on his, giving him a reassuring smile.

"Yoongi, i want you to know that I'll always be here for you and you can talk to me about this anytime okay? You're my best friend now! And I'm hoping I'm yours too?" You ask in a more playful tone making yoongi giggle.

"Of course you are"

"Good! Cause i come in a package deal of crackhead and supportive as well as a no return contract"

"Sounds perfect to me bestie"

-----------------------😚------------------------

Over 2 years had passed and the whole highschool down to the teachers were sure the two of you were in a relationship, as everyone saw the two of you being practically stuck together almost all the time. Yoongi and your friendship became stronger than ever since that day he decided to open up to you. It became a regular thing where you'd confide in each other for emotional comfort as well as motivation and support. Not missing the fact that your level of crackhead together had become an all time high.

Your finals and exams blasted through and you had spent all your study weeks with Yoongi in the library. As sketchy as it was you and your best friend actually did sincere studying. And as it would, your hard work together paid off earning the both of you high marks in your finals. The two of you didn't miss to make a trademark crackhead scene at the receiving of the scroll ceremony when you accidentally tripped on your shoelace and Yoongi cracked up laughing and clapping before helping you up. The two of you celebrate with drinks and a lot of food that night and Yoongi paid for everything to make it up to you for laughing when you fell.

You looked at yourself one last time in the mirror before heading out to your highschool's hall. It was your graduation party but more importantly to you it was Yoongi's birthday. Coincidentally the two events had fallen on the same day, and what better opportunity than to get dressed up to party at your graduation ceremony together. It had been a heck of a ride these last two years, and you were going to make sure this last school event would be memorable.

Upon arriving you scan around the hall of students in search of the familiar face.

"Looking for me?"

He makes his presence behind you known by clearing his throat. You turn around to give your usual playful comment back but the words were caught in your throat as your gaze landed on your best friend. He was dressed smart, in a suit that looked like it was custom made to fit him, his hair in a side part and bangs neatly framing his face. You were so used to seeing him in his casual hoodies and ripped jeans that seeing him in formal wear made you choke on your words.

Too focused on getting your senses back in check, you don't notice how Yoongi's train of thought was stopped dead in its tracks as he watched you turn around to face him. He never pictured his crackhead of a best friend in something other than t-shirts and track pants. Seeing you in a dress that hugged your figure in all the right places and taking in the sight of you, with your makeup and hair all done to suit the dress you were wearing nearly made him pass out from how he was holding his breath to admire you.

Clearing the silence between the two of you, Yoongi speaks up first.

"Well well, you don't completely look like the satanic spawn of hot cheetos and depression today. You actually look pretty good"

Smirking a little smile you bite back at his comment.

"Well same to you too Mr. I'm a millennial emo teen. You actually look, presentable today"

The two of you exchanged a playful giggle and assumed your seats at your class tables as the ceremony went on.

You don't see the small glances Yoongi takes in your direction, the thoughts gushing through his mind about how you looked at the moment and cursing himself for not realising your features sooner. He admired the way you had chosen to dress up today, seeing the way you had styled your hair so your curls would frame your face, the way you had done your makeup in a more natural looking way that he thought suited you perfectly. Yoongi didn't remember when the unlabeled feelings for you came but the longer he looked at you the more he was starting to put a name to the feelings he had. So much so that he had completely spaced out in his thoughts of you like that he didn't realise you were speaking to him.

" -don't you think so Yoongi?"

"I'm sorry what did you say? The umm, the music is so loud"

"I saaaaiiddd it's beginning to get a little dull at this graduation ceremony, we need a little surprise, don't you think?"

"Surprise?? What kind of surprise?"

Flashing a smile his way you get up and walk towards the front of the hall where the ceremony host was finishing up their ending speech. Whispering into the host's ear, he gives you the microphone and you confidently stride to the front. But you accidentally go too close to the speaker and it lets out an unpleasant squee, making you move back and away a little. You look up and around finding your best friend's eyes looking back at you giggling at the scene that just occured.

"Well that's one way to get everyone's attention" you chuckle earning muffled chuckles and words from the hall.

"So firstly congrats to everyone on graduating y'all did it. But that's not why I'm up here right now. Today is a special day for someone, and since it's the last day we'll all be gathering I wanted to make this memorable for him. So everyone I would like to wish out here, HAPPY BIRTHDAY MIN YOONGI"

you started to sing happy birthday and the rest of the hall joined in singing with you.

In all this happening, Yoongi could only focus on you, the way you just boldly got up to sing out loud and wish him Happy Birthday in the most "you" way possible. So he didn't know if it was the moment or if it was his unlabeled feelings overflowing for you, that he got up and walked towards you as the song was ending. He couldn't tell what came over him at that moment but he knew for sure he wasn't going to stop what he was about to do next. Cupping your cheeks in his palms, he leaned in, pressing his soft lips to yours. Kissing you with deep feelings overtaking his mind. The moment his lips touched yours he knew what those unlabeled feelings were, it was Love.

You couldn't process fast enough that your best friend was striding towards you with a goal, a desire. And you surely didn't expect for him to suddenly kiss you. Registering the feeling of his lips on yours, your eyes closed on their own as if on automatic response. You sank into the feeling of his lips, and it was then you felt the spark that ignited your own unlabeled feelings for Yoongi. You had definitely asked yourself countless times before if what you were feeling for Yoongi was more than just friendship. On the countless nights he had cried on your shoulder or when you cried on his, on the many occasions where you were both always partners in crime, you would always glance at Yoongi and wonder what more could there be to the feelings between you.

As the both of you slowly pulled away from each other a roaring sound of cheers erupted as it seemed to be that the two of you were the last ones to know you two were actually in love with each other. Taking your hand in his, Yoongi and you ran out of the hall that night knowing well where the two of you stood from that moment on.

-----------------------❤️------------------------

"No babe I think you should definitely take the opportunity to study there, I know it's far but it'll be really good for you, plus it's something you really like! It'll take some time for you to get used to the new place but i know you'll fit right in. In fact i know your wack ass would stand out"

You giggled at his comment but you wholeheartedly took his motivation and advice. But the question and thoughts still lingered in your mind as you heard Yoongi chuckle on the other end of the phone.

"But Yoongi, this means we'd be in a long distance relationship, with you going off to study in the opposite direction and all. Even our breaks don't match Yoongi.. what'll we do" the worrying tone in your voice didn't go unnoticed by Yoongi as he answered you in a calm reassuring tone.

"It'll take some work, but i know we can get through this okay? We'll make it, we can make it. I love you" you smiled at Yoongi's voice uttering the sweet words of love as you felt yourself calm your thoughts.

"I love you too Yoongi. Well then, keep me company while i pack?"

"You bet"

It had been a few months since you started dating, and honestly it didn't feel any different from when the two of you were in your phase of friendship, everything was going relatively smooth apart from the little fights and misunderstandings you had now that you were a couple. Sometimes you sit to think to yourself if moving into a relationship with Yoongi was the best choice, it would feel as though sometimes he would act differently and not like he always would but you just shake of the thoughts. You just figured with all these future college studies and intakes coming about that he was just as stressed as you were. You assured yourself that the two of you would be alright and that you'll always have each other.

A few more months pass and the two of you have already started your college lives. Yoongi being in a campus almost 8 hours away from you with minimal transport for him to even go home let alone plan to meet you. It was going smoothly, settling into orientation and getting to know the layouts of the campus well, meeting new friends and truly taking in your next step in education. You and Yoongi would exchange day to day text messages about how orientation and the first days of classes went.

All well and good till Yoongi's texts became slower and less frequent, he would always say that he's busy with his friends there, or straight up not giving a response at all. You became more and more fearful at how this long distance thing was going to work out for the two of you.

28th Tuesday

[12:27am] hey Yoongi! I hope you had a great day, I miss you and hope you sleep well, love you!

[08:40am] Hey Babe, good morning! I'm in class now, wishing we could skip like old times haha, hope you have a great day! Text me soon

[6:48pm] Hey i just got back to my dorm after classes, it was super fun! How was your day??

[8:11pm] Yoongi?? Are you okay? Are you busy babe?

[8:24pm] I miss youuuuuuuu :(

[10:16pm] Yoongi :(

You tossed your phone to the side of your bed as you felt your tears well up, why was he suddenly avoiding you? Is he okay?? Did he get hurt? Your thoughts were spiraling, getting messier till you heard the familiar ping from your phone. You scurried to your phone to see Yoongi's name pop up on the screen. Your smile quickly faded, replaced by disappointment at his reply.

[10:43pm] Hey, was busy with friends today, going to bed now ttyl <3

You frowned and wouldn't let him go this time. The days of short texts to unreplied texts and this is how he replies now? In a fit of fury you call him.

"Hello?-"

"Yoongi what's wrong? You haven't been replying to my texts as usual are you okay??"

"Mmh I'm fine, just busy with classes and my new friends y/n"

"Well I can't accept that answer Yoongi, I'm busy with classes and friend's here too but I take the time so why can't you?"

"Hey it's not that big of a deal y/n, we're in new environments now and it'll take me some time to settle in"

"Yoongi surely you have at least 5 minutes a day to text me??"

"Yeah of course I do, I just texted you didn't i?"

"That short ass reply was what you call a text Yoongi? It really sounds like you're avoiding me"

"You know what y/n I don't have time for this right now I'm tired"

"No Yoongi, I haven't talked to you properly in days come on don't you miss me Yoongi?"

"To be honest I've been enjoying the new company here that's I haven't missed you much"

"What do you mean Yoongi? You don't think of me?"

"Not all the time no, i have other things to think about here y/n i have new responsibilities here I can't be thinking about you all the damn time, just be happy I texted you back"

"Are you threatening to not text me anymore Yoongi? Is that what you're saying? You don't wanna talk to me anymore?"

"Oh god for fucks sake y/n stop being so clingy alright? Just grow up a little!"

The sound of his voice in heightened frustration made you choke on your words, you silenced yourself as his words rang loud in your head.

"You know what y/n I don't think this will work out, I'm going to get even busier and this will just be in the way of it all"

"Yoongi…"

"I'm sorry y/n but clearly this distance is proving that we won't work out"

"Are you... breaking up with me Yoongi?.."

The pain in your voice and the soft shaky exhale doesn't go unnoticed by Yoongi. Yoongi takes a deep breath, realising he spoke too fast in frustration. As much as he did feel for you this distance was tearing you apart and Yoongi didn't want to believe it but it was the truth. He spoke softer this time giving his side of his explanation.

"Y/n, you've been nothing but amazing to me, but I realize that we were more compatible as friends, I mean think about it, we've had so many petty fights that we never had before we dated. Our growing college life will further hinder our relationship. I don't want to hurt you like this by not giving you the love and attention you deserve. I'll always love you y/n, just not as more than friends I suppose"

You couldn't believe what was happening right now, your world felt like it was crashing down on you hard and fast, you could feel the sharp stinging in your chest from how your heart was breaking the more reality hit you. Yoongi's words had reason to them, but you were still in a state of confusion. Why could you make time for Yoongi but he couldn't for you? Maybe it's because the two of you are pursuing different fields of studies? Maybe he really had better things to do? Yoongi didn't want to hurt your feelings by making you feel abandoned so he was in fact abandoning you? No? But he said he'll still love you?? Your head was spinning a bunch of thoughts ran through your head.

"Okay Yoongi...if that's what would be the best for us..then okay"

"Don't worry okay? We'll still text as usual, talk when we can okay? I won't let you go, you're still my best friend y/n"

You didn't know if his words would be comforting enough, but at that moment you took what you had and calmed your thoughts for now.

"Okay Yoongi.."

"Good, I have an early schedule tomorrow. I'll talk to you later okay? I'm going to bed now. Goodnight y/n"

"Good night Yoongi"

-----------------------💔------------------------

As it will, Yoongi and you slowly drifted apart. You would often see his social media updates about how he was actively participating in clubs, and how he had taken up new responsibilities, going to camps and hosting events at his institute and he definitely seemed to be doing well. You on the other hand fell more and more at war with your emotions, it didn't hinder your studies. Thankfully you could keep those two apart. But whenever it got a little too quiet you'd think of him, the days in highschool when you were inseparable. You missed his laugh, his endearing way of calling you the most heinous nicknames. You definitely missed his comforting arms, his words of encouragement when you were down, you wished nothing more that in this moment you were crying to him instead of because of him.

You couldn't believe that you were sitting here, broken and feeling alone by the guy that made his way into your life, and had now made his way out in the most painful way possible. You were left there clueless and confused. Did he do it for you? Was it the right thing? Did he really think of you? Why was this happening? What would have happened if you didn't date? Would things be different? Would your best friend have stayed? All these questions playing through your mind, countless nights you spent crying yourself to sleep. Thinking of how you felt almost betrayed, you cursed at yourself for sending texts to him that were only left on read or replied with a simple "I'm busy, text you later".

Slowly days turned into weeks, and weeks turned into months as you hadn't spoken much to Yoongi. You became stone hearted from all that had happened and slowly you got back into yourself. You were more and more active in your college life and you were growing to be better at controlling your emotions. Sure some little things remind you of him now and then, but it was much easier by now to brush his thoughts off. As sadly as your situation was you learned to move with it and not let it consume you. Every now and then you'd see Yoongi piston updates on his progressively active life and you'd feel happy for him, you wondered if he ever felt the same for you when he saw your updates on how well you were doing.

----------------------🍃-------------------------

It had been a total of 4 years since everything happened, you were on a roll and you had graduated college. You had a few job applications pending and you were more stable with your life by now. All the questions you once had were stored in a box collection dust in the far corner of your mind.

It was a relaxing Saturday evening, you were in your apartment lounging on your bed. As you were chatting away with your friends a familiar ping aroused from your phone. The name that popped up on the screen made your heart heavy and you breathing shallow, a true ghost from your past…

"Yoongi 🥀"

Your screen read. Taking a deep breath you opened the chat.

[9:57pm] Hey y/n it's been a long time… are you free tonight? Can I call you?

You didn't know what exactly to think right now. Every cell in your brain telling you not to. That you shouldn't give into him again, and that you should just talk to him over text no matter what it was. But your heart was screaming for him, the familiar feeling of longing for him returning in a massive tsunami, washing over your thoughts. You took a deep breath to centre your thoughts and decided you'd listen to him and talk to him again.

[9:59pm] Hey Yoongi, yeah I'm free to talk.

As soon as the message was read by him, your phone rang. You took one more deep breath and answered the call.

"Hello y/n, how are you?"

You cursed in your head at how much you missed his voice, the way he spoke to you at this moment had a hint of the same longing you had for him.

"Hey..Yoongi, I'm good. How are you?"

"I've been good too.. congratulations on graduating"

"Thanks Yoongi, congratulations on graduating too.."

"Thanks…"

The silence that fell had you both reflecting on everything that happened and how fast it all went by. The box of questions in your mind burst out once again whereas Yoongi on the other hand was feeling guilt and hate towards himself for everything that he put you through. Little did you know that these last few months Yoongi was hit with the hard realisation that he had lost not only his best friend but the person he cared about the most. His family certainly did not improve and the one person who was there for him when he needed it, he had left broken hearted and abruptly once he found a new escape. Yoongi was slowly flooded with memories of you as he neared his own college graduation. He remembered your highschool graduation and how he felt for you there in that moment of time. He spent a few nights crying at the realisation that he had thought of what's best for you but didn't think of how you felt and how he had left things between the two of you.

"Why Yoongi…."

Was all you managed to say out loud before your emotions caved in. Understanding what you were asking he answered.

"I was so caught up in the new environment of growing up and moving on that I did what I thought was the best to not hurt you...but I didn't think far enough that doing so will indeed hurt you.. and I wasn't there for you like i was supposed to. It took a hard hit to my head to realise that I was wrong y/n… you were always there for me and stupidly I made this mistake… I thought i was thinking of the best for both of us, when in fact i was thinking of myself.. I was selfish and I realised that…so many things reminded me of you y/n, the clouds, the sun, the sight of roses, the smell of hot cheetos.."

You giggled a little at his last comment earning a little muffled one from Yoongi.

"I understand if you hate me for what I did to you y/n… and I don't know if it'll ever be the same between us again.. but I'm willing to try to bring back what we had... if you're willing to give me a chance…"

You exhaled softly before letting out everything that you've been feeling.

"I don't hate you Yoongi, I never could and I never will. You're everything to me Yoongi and I was just really hurt by what you did and how you ended things. So many thoughts went through my head and I won't even talk about how much you made me cry….you dipshit" the playful cursing nickname made Yoongi chuckle a little, slowly making him feel reassured at the directions of the conversation.

"I'm willing to give us a chance Yoongi..and you're right, I don't expect it to be the same as what we had, I just hate that I lost my best friend.."

"I know..i understand that..and I'm sorry..for everything"

"It's okay Yoongi, I'm sorry too… maybe I should've been more understanding…"

"Hey… do you.. wanna hang out Tomorrow night?"

"You wanna hang out?"

"Yeah, i wanna see you and catch up with you"

"Sure Yoongi that'd be nice"

"Great!! I'll meet you at the café by our old highschool?"

"Sure Yoongi, sounds great"

"Right then, I'll see you tomorrow?"

"See you tomorrow Yoongi"

You could hear the smiles in each other's voices as you both bid goodnight and hung up the phone. You didn't know what it was exactly but you knew just from that phone call that everything was going to be alright. You felt like you breathed much easier now, your mind much lighter. Yoongi felt the same, he was smiling more now filled with the excitement of meeting you again tomorrow after years.

-----------------------✨------------------------

You made sure to check yourself out in the mirror a few more times before heading towards the café. You had chosen to wear a simple yet stylish outfit, your hair tied back in a low loose ponytail, your short hairs framing your face. You were nervous yet excited to be reunited with your best friend again. And as you approach the café, there he was. Standing outside the door of the café waiting for you. The now slightly more mature looking, dark fluffy haired man, wearing a long black coat was looking just as nervous and excited as he was looking down at his feet.

"I didn't know you needed glasses to see now"

your voice made him turn his head fast in your direction. The moment his gaze landed on you, it felt like highschool all over again. The way you looked standing there, just centimetres away from him. He took in your slightly matured face yet he told himself that you hadn't changed one bit.

"It's official, you're old Yoongi"

He chuckled and playfully scoffed at your comment.

"Well at least i don't dress like the satanic spawn of depression and hot cheetos"

"Sure thing Mr. I'm still a millennial emo teen"

The two of you laughed, and the world seemed to slow down. The feeling that nothing ever really changed between the two of you was knowing, however this time something felt entirely different. Both of you could feel it for sure. It was the feeling of a bond stronger than both friendship and love. You didn't know what the feeling was exactly, all that you knew was that you're never losing each other again. All this while you've been sitting there watching the feelings you had burn and crash in the worst way possible, but today right here at this café, right in front of your eyes you watched everything Begin Again.

#bts #bts fanfic #bts fanfction #bts au #yoongi fanfic #bts min yoongi #min yoongi #bts yoongi #kpop fluff #bts fluff #bts angst

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jordluna · 4 years

Text

Meeting Clint Barton

Natasha x daughter!reader

You weren't one to mention the beginning of your childhood. Up until the age of six, you never played on the playground, had play dates with friends, or went to school. In fact the closes thing you had to that was the education they gave you in the red room. The only normal thing you would ever have was having a mother.

"Why do we have to go again?" You ask Natalia as she loads a whole lot of guns and other various weapons into a duffle bag. The two of you were currently going to a mission. The location happened too be in the United States. Luckily for you English was your second language so you and Natasha fit in like a mother daughter duo there just perfectly.

"You know why Y/n. It's either complete the mission or be killed. Do you want to die?" Natalia asks a little to harshly then what she meant but she needed to make sure you knew that this was no joke. You quickly nodded your head.

You were created by the red room during the graduation ceremony. Madame B had been telling her ever since she was a little girl that she would never be able to have kids after that. She should have known it was all a lie.

Natalia and you were not at all close back then. You can thank Madame B and the other instructors for that. You knew she was your mother by the obvious resemblance. Still your small self couldn't wrap around the fact that she was your mother. Neither could she. Everyone knew the Black Widow was not in any way mother material. Or so everyone thought.

Madame B quickly opened the door as your mother zipped the duffle bag. You stood behind her carrying your small suitcase.

"The plane taking you to your location will be departing soon. Better hurry up."

"Yes Madame." Natalia said.

*****

You've been on a couple of missions with your mother before but never one in America. Washington D.C. to be more specific. The red room always thought it would be a good idea for you and Natalia to be somewhat murderous partners. The cold hearted assassin and her daughter.

What everyone didn't know was Natalia wasn't as cold hearted as people thought. This also included you. She did have a weakness and that was her love for you. All though she never really showed it, she did care deeply for you. She wished that she could give you both a better life together. Where you could have friends, go to school, have a loving home. She's even dreamed about it before.

Natalia knew though that those things would most likely never come true. You both were going to be stuck in this hell hole that you couldn't escape.

Once you two landed you guys almost immediately went to work. The two of you side by side would take down whatever of the red rooms enemy's. Although you could kick anyone's ass you were still six and some people were still to strong and experienced for you.

After a couple of days when you finished the mission Natasha wanted to get you something nice. You were a little surprised when she took you to the nearest park not expecting it at all. She watched you very carefully as you try the new play equipment for the first time. Natalia wouldn't know what she would do if something happened to you when she wasn't watching.

What surprised both of you is that you were able to make a couple of friends around your age there also. When they first approached you, you were almost ready to attack them if they stepped a few feet closer. However they asked you if you wanted to play a game called tag with them, which you happily agreed with. They explained the rules and you had a blast with them. Your mother enjoyed seeing you act like a normal six year old for once.

When she took you back to the abandoned warehouse you two were currently staying at, you told her how much fun you had. She smiled while nodding on as you told her how you felt so fast as they chased you around the playground and the joy mixed with excitement. You both wished deeply you could experience this moment again.

"Natalia, when do we have to go back to Russia?" You asked, with a deflated look across your face. She gave you a sad smile while rubbing your back, something she has never done before.

"We have to leave tomorrow morning. I wish we could stay and go to the park again though." You just agree with her knowing there was nothing else you could do.

"I will be back in an hour." Natasha says to you. You nod and wait for her to return. What you didn't know was Natasha was on her way to buy you a stuffed teddy bear. Something that you've never had before. She went to the nearest shop and even though she barely had anymore American cash she was able to buy you the teddy bear.

*****

"You got eyes on the prize Barton?" Fury says into Clint's ear piece.

"Damn right I do." Clint repeats back, as he stands on a buildings roof close to the shop your mother was in. Shield had sent him to go assassinate the famous Black Widow. He had immediately recognized the vibrant red hair, he had only seen in a few photos when she walked in.

"To many civilizations. I can't kill her just yet Fury. Are you even sure this is the right Black Widow we want to kill? She looks like she in her early twenties. How deadly can she be?" Clint says noticing Natalia's young features and sweet fake smile she gives the cashier.

"Clint Barton this woman is credited with almost 2,000 assassinations. Trust me, this is her. and finish the target needs to be killed before she can hurt anyone one else."

"Copy that Fury. I will kill her when she's in her hideout." Clint says. He looks through his binoculars again, and sees something interesting. The widow with a teddy bear in her hands? No it can't be. He pushes the thought of who it might be for out of his mind as follows Natalia from a far.

When Natalia comes back into the warehouse she's met with your saddened face awaiting to be talked back to that terrible home. Your smile comes back when she sees what she's holding in her hands.

"Is that a teddy bear?" You ask her hoping it is meant for you.

"Yes it is Y/n." she says kneeling to your level lifting her hand up to give you the bear. She sees your smile light up even more as you hug the teddy bear tightly. "I'm sure there's a way we can hide it from the rest of the red room."

"Thank you, thank you, thank you Natalia!" You say with joy, which makes Natasha give a smile. The first one that's not fake.

"Your welcome." She puts her hand slowly on your shoulder as a small sign of affection. However it means the world to both of you having to grow up to show no emotion unless it has to be plastered on.

You and Natalia's sweet moment though is interrupted by a bow zooming into the warehouse. It lands on the ground but your eyes grow wide to the bright red flashing light, with numbers slowly going down.

Before you can process what's happening your mother grabs you and uses her body as a shield while a loud bast fills the room and you two are crushed by rubble.

"Mama!" You scream in your terrified state. The smell of smoke fills your lugs as Natasha gripes her arms tighter around your body, afraid that if she let you go, something terrible will happen. You obviously hadn't meant at that moment to call her mama but she wasn't mad at all. It was in fact one of the best feelings she's felt in a long time.

"It's okay baby, I'm here, I'm right here." You immediately start to feel more safe as you hug your mother tighter.

As Clint watches the explosion happens he hopes that he's completed the mission. He knows that it was a quick death. Probably better than she deserved. He hisses as he sees rubble move from underneath the ruins of the warehouse.

"Shit." He whispers.

"You just had to make this more difficult." Fury says knowing exactly that he hadn't necessarily finished his work.

"Guess this is going to be a little trickier than I thought."

You and Natalia both pushed the last piece of rubble blocking you from the night sky. You took a deep breathe of the air and looked around to see your surrounding everything was on fire. All your clothes they gave you and the spare food. All you had left was your gun, the teddy bear, and your mom.

"Y/n!" Natalia screams while grabbing you forcefully again and pulling you into her arms. An arrow almost slices through your skin but misses as you move swiftly. You can feel the overbearing weight on your chest get tighter. "Y/n you have to listen to me. You have to run far away to the woods near here alright? I will come get you as soon as I can."

"No Natalia, I can help you fight the arrow guy! I don't want to leave without you." You say as tears well up in your eyes terrified of loosing her.

"I know you do, but I don't want you to get hurt baby. Whatever happened to calling me mama?" Natalia said hurt that moment would only last for a second.

"You like it? I thought you would be mad at me."

"I'm not Y/n. Now please go!" She says hearing more explosions coming from near by.

"I love you." You say as the tears finally roll down.

"I love you too. I love you so much." Natalia says raising her hand to your cheek.

You start running as fast as you can and take one last look at her before going off into the woods.

*****

As Hawkeye wonders around the ruins of the warehouse he has his bow already ready waiting to see if his target had been killed already. He takes one more step but feels the cool metal pressed behind his head.

"Hawkeye." The Black Widow snarls angrily at the man.

"Widow." He repeats.

"So here to kill me I see. Sorry to tell you but your mission isn't going to be fulfilled today."

"I doubt that." Just then he takes his bow and strikes your mother in the thigh forcefully making her groan but nothing more. She aims a punch in his gut that is affective and uses her legs and wraps them around his neck. She throws him to the ground but he somehow manages to use her strength against her and pins her down.

"I think your mission to live long isn't gonna be fulfilled." Clint says as Natalia tries to escape but Clint has a firm grip.

"I will make it a quick death." Clint says aiming an arrow at your mother.

Just then he hears the sound of a gun being fired but no ammunition comes out. He looks to the sound and sees you holding a unloaded gun shaking vigorously at him. He notices the grimy teddy bear your holding in your other hand.

"You brought a child to the scene Widow?" Natalia looked at you and practically motioned for you to run off before you would meet your death also. Or worse witness hers. However you just stood there dumbfounded knowing if you made one wrong move your mother would have an arrow through her skull.

"Leave baby, please leave for me!" She yells in Russian.

"I'd rather die trying to be with you again mama." You say to her. You see the fear in her eyes then look to Clint. He doesn't understand Russian but was now putting the pieces together that the Black Widow has a child.

"She's got a kid." Clint says in his ear piece.

"That's not possible. There are no records of the deadly assassin bearing or with a child." Fury says back.

"Well she does. A little one. Probably no more than 7." Clint looks at Natalia then you.

"No! Don't hurt her! Spare her life I'm the one you want dead!" Natasha begs from her position on the ground.

"How about you two come with me?" Clint asks confusing everyone.

"What the hell did you just say?" Fury questions angrily. Clint though just ignores him.

"Wha.. what? Natasha says.

"Come to Shield where I work at. I'm giving you this opportunity because I've been in your place before. People can change. You can change."

"I don't know about this... You did try to shoot my daughter with your arrows." You give in a little smile.

"Mama, I don't want to go back to the red room. I wanna stay in America with Shield!" You squeal excitedly.

"My name's Clint." He says while extending his arm to help your mother up.

"I'm Natalia, but that will have to soon change I guess. This little one right here is my daughter."

"Hi, Clint I'm Y/n." You say shyly hiding behind your mothers back. She however nudges you forward gently to get you to come out and shake his hand.

"I'm not sure where you're going at Barton but oh well." Fury says.

May have a part 2!

#natasha x daughter!reader #natasha romanoff x daughter!reader

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fayeimara · 3 years

Text

Meant To Be || One For Every Billion

6. By My Side | Pt 4

"You've got to be kidding me."

Your group has already grabbed a table on the second floor balcony, overlooking the crowded paths below, at one of the nicer restaurants at the heart of the park's main food district and you've been checking updates on your phone after messaging Tobio and Hiro when Oikawa's unamused voice breaks through your thoughts.

You glance up to your left at him to see a look of disbelief on his face and when you follow his line of sight, you see the two stragglers everyone has been waiting on heading your way, weaving through the tables to reach you all.

"Tobio!" A smile breaks across your face at your cousin's grumpy visage. He seems a little closed off, studying the additions to your group with what you think is apprehension.

"Tobio?" Toru's head literally snaps towards you in question.

You turn to him as Tobio and Hiro come to a stop and pull out the two empty chairs at your table.

You hear Iwa murmur a low, "Oh shit." but you have to dismiss it because you're clearly missing something.

"Yeah," you watch Toru with a question in your own eyes, "My cousin, Kageyama Tobio. And Hiro, Hana's brother.."

Iwaizumi is actually facepalming while Maki and Mattsun are chuckling, but you can't see what's so funny so you continue with the introductions, "Tobio, this is-"

"We already know each other, Y/n. I went to school with Oikawa-san and Iwaizumi-san until they graduated this year."

Okay, small world. All you can really say while you digest this information is, "Oh."

But then, "Hiro doesn't know them... right?"

"No, not yet!" Hana's a lifesaver that steps in to make introductions with the rest of the guys while you chew it over. There's clearly history here, right?

Then, you kind of get an answer because Toru turns to speak with you while the others greet each other, "So let me get this straight. Ushiwaka and Tobio-chan are both your cousins?"

"Um. Yeah. Pretty much." You watch his eyes narrow on your response.

"Pretty much?"

"Yeah, Tobio's actually Shin's cousin but they're both more like brothers to me. I guess it's the same situation with Toshi but on my dad's side... we're not directly related either."

You can see the understanding light up his eyes for a moment, "You choose them, huh? As family?"

"Exactly."

"Interesting taste. So family but not."

"No. They're definitely my family, no question. Nothing will ever change that."

You and Toru stare at each other for a moment as you both try to work out what's going on in the other's head and where the lines are. When he doesn't reply back, you raise an eyebrow and prompt, "So.. you and Tobio..?"

He lets out a laugh that might be just a little bitter, "Please, there's no me and Tobio."

"Hm." You let it sit there because you're not one to pry more than that when someone is clearly somewhat unhappy. You'll get it out of Tobio later anyways.

And, cue lightbulb, "You were on the volleyball team together."

A cavalier smile spreads across his face at your question, it's definitely not sweet, teasing, or nice. It seems carefree but the expression in his eyes is almost telling you to back off. However, he still answers, "We were on the same team once, sure."

"Okay."

"Okay?"

"Yeah." You smile with what you hope is the kindness you want to relay and not the awkward uncertainty you're feeling, "Why? Do you have more you want to say?"

He studies you a moment longer before turning away to pick up his menu and study it instead. You still hear his quiet answer, "No."

You look away as well and your eyes fall over Tobio, who's looking back at you. His expressionless gaze doesn't convey much but, for once, even you can't read beneath it, and then the connection's cut when he glances away to the rides in the distance.

Okay.

The lunch goes surprisingly well considering the amount of tension around the table at the start. Mostly between Toru and Tobio, but even Iwaizumi seems more... engaged in the situation. Everyone else continues to get along fairly well and make up for those three, however, and the atmosphere eases out eventually. It probably helps that Tobio is quiet as per usual and Toru is unerringly good at pretending all is well in Oikawa-land.

When everyone heads out for the rest of the rides, you do catch Toru watching you interact with Tobio and Shin but you don't know what's so curious about your relationship with your cousins. What you do think is curious is his interest and attention when you're joking around with Karu or talking to Hiro. See, he doesn't seem to mind if you sit with your cousins, his friends or Hana, but somehow always manages to slip into the seat next to you if it looks like one of Hana's brothers will.

It's so obvious that you can't help but bring it up as you exit the picture booth at one of the rides, "Not that I should have to ask you permission, but are you going to let me sit with Karu or Hiro?"

"Do you want to sit with one of them?"

"Don't answer my question with a question."

"I like having you by my side."

"Still not an answer to my original question."

"Do you not want me next to you?"

"Stop avoiding my question or I'm going to assume you're jealous."

"Sounds like you want me to be jealous."

"I didn't say that."

"You also didn't deny it, Angel."

"Toru." You mean to admonish him for the little games he's playing but when his first name slips out and you see the wide grin start to spread across his face, you have to close your eyes in defeat.

It's with your eyes closed, as you're taking a breath to find your calm, you hear a soft smile in his voice as he calls to you, "Y/n."

And when you open your eyes he's holding up a printed picture from the ride you were just on. You and Toru are sitting next to each other, your hands interlocked between you again and you're trying to hold your hair down with your free hand, while strands still fly everywhere from the wind, to look over at him. Your expressions are caught in that moment, now eternal, as you're laughing at the cute pose he's trying to make for the picture but he's looking back at you and not the camera, with the happiest grin on his face.

"Why this one out of all the others?"

"I've been getting those too, just electronically. I wanted you to have this one."

"It's for me?"

"So you can remember how much I like you by my side."

You can only smile and take the picture from him, responding with a soft, "Thank you."

"Say my name again, Angel."

"Oikawa."

"My first name."

"No."

"Please." He's giving you the cutest puppy eyes, but-

"I said no." And you turn to walk away before he can actually convince you, the smile still stretching your lips as you carefully tuck the picture into the hidden pocket, between your phone and cards to keep it from crumpling as much as possible.

-x-x-x-

Your group and Toru's end up going separate ways after an early dinner, which Miwa and her friend joined you all for. She got along famously with the unexpected additions to the group which you found pretty ironic. So did Toru, you guess, since he made it a point to state his delight at meeting a better Kageyama. No comment, you're biased.

You did have to promise Toru that you'd see him again before you left the park which, oopsie, you guess you never mentioned you'd also booked rooms to stay overnight. Haha. Yeah. You wonder if that means you can message him in the morning?

No, he'd just message you tonight if you don't first. He's already texting every so often and it's just been about fifteen minutes since you both went separate ways. So you end up texting him back to promise you'll see him in an hour or so, after some quality time with your cousins.

Back with the original group consisting of just your family, you all head over to one of the themed lounges to grab desserts and drinks. Tobio, of course, sticks with milk, while Miwa is all about getting her drink on with Sakepolitans - a cosmo made with sake.

Ren manages to convince her to order him an old fashioned or two, stating he's almost legal anyways - you roll your eyes at that - but you and Shin decide to experiment with the house recommendations. He goes with the Uji Matcha Latte while you go your typically coffee route with the café mocha.

An hour flies by fast as you all catch up on your day and make plans for the next but, by the end of it, Miwa is definitely in need of a bed, maybe with a trashcan by the side, and Tobio might actually be asleep on the table.

After telling Shin to stick with you and Tobio, Ren hauls Miwa away to get some sleep, letting you both know he'll be meeting back up with his friends after she's tucked in so to call if any of you need him. He does hesitate briefly, glancing between you and Shin, and you swear he mutters, "Just how much trouble can they get into here?" before shaking his head and leaving.

Hm. You throw a look over to Shin as he shakes Tobio awake and state, "Why don't you get him back to his room while I finish my coffee?"

He eyes you warily, considering your offer, "Right. Like you'll go to your room straight after?"

"What? Don't tell me you're not meeting up with Karu after you drop Tobio to bed."

His mouth opens but literally no words come out. Yeah, that's what you thought.

"What about you? Meeting up with your boyfriend?" Never mind, he found his words. Well, you can too.

"Why do sound like a elementary school kid? Oh right, emotionally you are one."

"I'm telling Ren that you're sneaking out." Rat. He would never, would he?

"You're literally just proving my point. Please, keep going."

"Why are you like this?" Ah, there's the crack. But you need to push a little more.

You lean back with a mocking smile, "Better than you at everything?"

Yup, now he's pouting. "Mean."

"It's genetic. You should know, you are too."

"Wow, I can't believe we're related."

"Me neither. Now, should I let you do your thing and have fun with your friend? Or do we call Ren and both end up stuck in our rooms for the night."

"How do you always...? Never mind." He grimaces in complete defeat, "Fine. Just keep your phone on and answer me right back if I message or call."

He's about to turn away but stops and adds, "And obviously old rules apply. You call immediately if you run into Ren so I can have my story together or make sure I'm back."

"Obviously." You smirk up at him over the mug before taking a sip.

But he didn't even have to say it. Whatever shit the two of you pull on each other, you also have each others backs when it counts. Especially with your older siblings. That was the pact those of you within a one to two year age range made with each other when you were all kids, as if any of you even had to. It's kind of cute you guess, but you'd never say that to any of them or they'd never stop harassing you.

As he heads off, you pull out your phone to message Toru and then decide to drop a picture of your drink on your twitter while you wait for his response. Which is unnecessary because the boy responds almost immediately. What, was he waiting by his phone?

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Masterlist

Behind The Scenes!

-Y/n also stopped to get pics... at all the rides

-Toru might have been telling the truth and got them all lol and he was def caught looking at her in more than just that one ;)

-Not that she wasn't... I don't know about you, but I definitely think I know which ones they'll both get printed :)

A/N: Really getting there.. one more part left in this episode! Buckle up, it's the longest one <3

Taglist: @delusivist, @prettyinblack231, @kac-chowsballs, @sakusasimpbot, @hawkthekinnie

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bngtanah · 4 years

Text

The Difference Between Boys & Girls | o3

summary: Sam & Erin are university students who share a cheap one bedroom apartment above a shitty takeaway restaurant. Due to the limited space, they’ve grown accustomed to sharing just about everything, including the occasional kiss.

pairing: Jung Hoseok (Samuel Park) x Named OC characters: meet the cast.

genre: angst, smut, fluff

chapters: o1| o2| o3| o4| o5| o6| o7| o8| o9| 10| 11| 12| 13| 14

warning: boyfriend!hoseok, jealous!hoseok, friends to lovers trope, college au, angst, sexual themes, slow burn

a/n: still a fool. still reuploading.

"So did he take you home and bang you?"

Erin groaned, knowing that this would be the only thing Kasey would be concerned about when she decided to tell her about what happened between her and Sammy two nights ago. Kasey had always been a straightforward kind of girl and that trait was one of the many things Erin admired about her friend.

She had no problem making her many opinions known and heard by whoever was in earshot, not that she was rude; the girl just appreciated being heard. Erin always wondered how she managed to find a home in a country so strict on ways to manner yourself with everyone you met when the Kasey she knew was not a fan of censoring herself for someone else's benefit. Then again, she had been here for over four years now so clearly something was working for her.

"No, he did not take me home and bang me" Erin answered in a hushed voice, glancing around at the groups of people sat near them in the tiny cafe. They didn't seem like they were eavesdropping, but the second Kasey alluded to sex Erin saw a few nosey Ajumma's slowly turn in their direction.

"We just went home. I took a shower, called Brian then went to bed. I think Sammy fell asleep watching TV."

"So that's just it? You didn't even bring up the fact that he tried to kiss you?" Kasey asked, sounding dumbfounded.

"Not that night. I mean, he was acting weird the entire walk back to our apartment and when we finally did get home, he just kicked off his shoes and laid out on the couch," Erin sighed and leaned forward to take a small sip of her Green Tea Latte "I brought it up the next day though."

"And?" Kasey was as impatient as she opinionated, the two seconds Erin took to clear her throat was just too much for her.

"You need to cool it on the expresso, and he just apologised. His exact words were 'Ah, noona! I'm so sorry I was a little drunk and I shouldn't have tried to take advantage of you, it won't happen again'. Then he did some annoying aegyo, kissed me on the forehead, I went to class and now I'm here with you and honestly I'm just over the entire thing."

Erin sounded confident, but her best friend knew that couldn't be further from the truth.

"Is that so?" Kasey asked with a catlike smirk as she attempted to catch Erin's eyes.

"Yup! totally over it" Erin replied while staring out the window.

"Erin."

"Alright, fine I'm not over it!" She groaned as she crumbled like a house of cards and rested her head against the table. "I can still feel his breath on my skin and every time I look at him I just wanna push against the wall and make him finish what he started." The ajumma's seated a table across from them pursed their lips and got up.

"Then why don't you do that?" Kasey stated like it was the simplest thing in the world.

Erin picked her head up and looked over at her best friend who was currently mutilating the foam cat floating on top of her hot cocoa. "Because.... it's not that easy. We've been friends for so long and we live together and that would just complicate things. There's also the fact that I don't know if he feels the same way."

"Oh c'mon Erin you can't believe that"

"I'm serious, Kas. I don't."

"So you think he was just trying to keep you from getting a cold with his lips the other night?"

"No, but that means nothing. I know that I'm pretty, I know that I was wearing a sexy dress that night and I know that we were both a little tipsy and our inhibitions were lowered. He's my friend, but he's still a guy so I get that he's gonna be attracted to me sometimes. What I don't know is if he wants to be with me the way I want to be with him."

Kasey raised an eyebrow and pushed her mug forward so that she could rest her palms against the table. "I thought you just wanted to screw him."

Erin shrugged and adjusted the beanie on her head, gnawing at her bottom lip between her teeth "I do...I mean. I did, but it's different now. I want to hold his hand and snuggle up on the couch and watch pride prejudice together, go for walks on the beach..."

"So basically, all the shit ya'll do now but with sex?" Kasey pointed out.

"Well. Yeah."

It was Kasey turn to sigh now, and she did. Loudly and dramatically, she loved Erin to bits but there was no way she could be this clueless. "Then why don't you tell him that? What's the worse that could happen, he says nah and you two go back to being weird like you are now"

"I don't wanna risk it" Erin reiterated "Plus now Brian's in the mix and that's throwing me off because one part of me wants to wait for some kind of sign from Sammy but the other part of me really wants to see what could happen with Brian."

"I've been meaning to ask about that, are you really going to go out with him? He doesn't sound like your usual type; unemployed, flirty, short."

"We met for coffee yesterday, actually. He is not unemployed; he's an artist, his flirtations aren't creepy, and he's not short! He's like a full inch taller than me," Erin pouted in Brian's defense.

"Whatever, did you tell him how deep in love you are with your roommate?"

Erin glowered at Kasey and flipped her off "We didn't stay too long because he had an emergency at his studio. He's taking me out tomorrow night though I don't know exactly where but he made it sound nice." She mused with a small smile.

Kasey shrugged gently, choosing to give up the chance to berate her friend again she wasn't going to make any headway until Erin was ready to truly confront what she was feeling for Sammy.

"All jokes aside you really should talk to him about it, E." Erin's mouth opened to refute her, but Kasey held up a hand and continued speaking "You don't have to tell him you're in love with him, even though I know you are. At least tell him that you're attracted to Sam. It wouldn't be fair for you to let him jump headfirst into this without being given the option to back out if he doesn't want to deal with that."

Erin was silent for a few seconds. She knew that Kasey was right in some sense, but that didn't make the idea any easier to swallow. She didn't want to end up hurting Brian in the future, but there was such a slim chance of anything happening between her and Sammy. Would it really be worth it to put her budding relationship to the test over a something that had such a small possibility of being an actual problem?

"I know.."

"I was this close, dude! So close to kissing her, I could taste the tequila on her breath," Sammy exclaimed as she tossed a soft felt basketball into the air.

"So why didn't you?" Du-jin asked, though he wasn't particularly interested since he was currently enthralled with an RPG on his phone.

Samuel sighed heavily and pulled the plush toy close to his chest once it fell back into his hands "That guy she met at the gallery called; ruined the whole mood" He grumbled then turned to look down at his classmate who was seated on the floor in front of the couch Sammy was lying on. "Are you even listening to me?"

"Huh? Yeah, a gallery shooting ruined the mood" Du-jin replied, his eyes never leaving the screen.

Sammy frowned and reached down to pluck the cellphone from Du-jin's hands before quickly hopping off the couch and running around the to the back before Du-jin had the chance to stand up and catch him. His friend was taller that he was, with much longer arms and legs, but he was nowhere near as coordinated as Sam was. Sammy had seen him stumble and trip over his own two feet too many times to count.

"Just listen to me for two minutes and you can have your phone back." Sam bargained once Du-jin started complaining and demanding his possession back.

"You are so damn needy," Du-jin grumbled but returned to sit on the floor anyway "What is this about? You're making out with your roommate now?"

"Almost," Sam corrected as he hopped over the back of the couch and relaxed again "You know Erin, she came with me when we went out for noraebang a few months ago."

"Oh, the black girl? I thought she was your girlfriend," Du-jin said, as his eye squinted together in confusion "You two barely talked to anyone else the whole night and that duet you sang...."

"We're close" Sammy responded before he had a chance to bring up any more evidence.

"I have close female friends too.... I don't touch any of them," Du-jin rebutted.

"Maybe you're not as close as you think."

"This isn't about me. If you're such close friends why do you want to kiss her?"

This question gave Samuel pause, and he sat up slightly before answering "I don't know... she's cute" He said after a beat "And it wouldn't have been the first time we've kissed."

"So she was your girlfriend."

"No, not like that. Just teenage shit when we were kids, nothing serious. Well, there was that time on the beach..."

"You've got sixty seconds left, so I'd make this quick."

Sam puffed his cheeks out and pouted before explaining himself “When we were kids were snuck out after my graduation and ended up making out. If we hadn't been caught we probably would have done a lot more than that.” The young man sighed wistfully as pleasant memories flooded his mind “I remember being so excited when we got back to my house I thought I would finally get the chance to confess, and she'd be my girlfriend, but she just told me she had to go home then she went back to university and she was so busy we didn't even get to talk for the rest of that week. I don't think we've ever talked about that since it happened.”

"What's stopping you from bringing it up now?" Du-jin asked while peering at his watch.

"I-Well it’s different now," Sammy stammered "She seems happy and I can't just bring up the past and ruin something that could be good for her with these uncertain feelings"

"Wow, sounds like you've got a problem" Du-jin's voice was flat and monotone as he reached for his cellphone and quickly opened the game again.

"Ah, hyung. I'm really frustrated here, give me some useful advice." Sam whined.

"What do you want me to tell you? You waited too long to make up your mind and now you're in an awkward position. You can either ruin her new relationship before it starts and piss her off or stand by and hope that they break up soon." Du-jin advised from the floor.

Sam frowned and began to speak before the sound of the door unlocking made him shut up. Once his roommate was inside and in his eye view Sam rushed from his seat to embrace her.

Erin's knees nearly buckled from the sudden contact but she regained her composure after a few seconds "Hi Sammy" She laughed and wrapped her arms around him to return his hug before quickly stepping away, "Uh-have you eaten? I stopped to get some food before I came home" Erin asked while she sidestepped Sammy and moved toward the kitchen. The boy seated near their couch caught her attention and Erin bowed instinctively "Hello, you're... Doo-jun right? You're in one of Sammy engineering classes."

"Du-jin but you were close enough" Du-jin smiled, the deep dimples in his cheeks becoming more noticeable.

"Ah, I apologise. I'm not very good with names, are you hungry? There's enough food here for all of us," She asked while placing the bag full of containers on the counter.

Du-jin nodded and offered to help, but Erin only waved him off, stating that she could handle a few plates of food as she began preparing everything from the containers.

Samuel had moved from the door and was currently hovering near the entrance of the kitchen, watching Erin from behind with an affectionate smile. The longer he stood in silence and watched her interact with his classmate, the smile that spread across her face when she laughed making his heart swell. Sam realised that his 'uncertain feelings' where Erin was concerned were not as uncertain as he once thought.

In fact, he was certain that he was now in very big trouble.

#hoseok x oc #hoseok x reader #j hope fanfic #j hope smut #jung hoseok #hoseok fanfic #dbbg #bngtanah

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