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harrysmimi · 1 year

Note

Okay okay soooooo this is my request. You totally do not have to but I thought it was cute. So Harry is himself and YN is a teacher at an art teacher at a school and he comes to visit them and the kids react to them being a relationship with himmmmm👀

Also I love your writing and I think you’re amazing❤️❤️

Idk about art that much. But music counts as art as well. Hope you don't mind.

Lunch Time

Synopsis: One where YN's students are shocked to see her husband (WC 1365)

More of my work

"Oh my god! Ms. YLN, Harry Styles literally has the same jumper as you!" Mary, one of YN's students exclaimed as soon as she walked in.

"Oh my— that's literally the same thing!" John, the other one from the very corner of the classroom.

YN was a highschool Music teacher, she was a big part of the art department of her school. All students loved her for some reason she never can pin point.

Today she wore one of her husband's jumper, a old brown one with green designs on the hem and the above the cuffs of the sleeves. When she originally picked it out of her husband's side of the closet she never thought it was something he wore in public where he was pictured.

She's been having symptoms of common flu lately after she visited her mum who had flu as well. Her husband being away on a tour from past six weeks. Though he's returning home later today she still felt the meed to put on one of his jumpers. They are soft, they're warm and they smell like him even though they've been washed.

She could not take few days off as she had already taken all her paid leaves to go see her husband at his Manchester shows. She needed that money to pay off her students loans.

YN never in a million years thought her students, who are bery obviously her husband's hardcore fans to recognise his clothes. It wasn't her first time wearing his clothes to work, that's all she wears om days she doesn't feel like dressing up.

"Oh thank you Mary, it's a gift." YN said. "Okay class settle down now." She began with her class her music history lessons. Taking a small five minutes break to go bring her water bottle she forgot at her office like an idiot.

Just as was about to leave her office, she got a text from her husband. He was coming home early when she told him a yesterday that she was starting to feel sick. He'd seen her be sick just once and it was just awful. He took the first flight home immediately after his show last night from France, which was very late in his opinion.

Mister⭐

- Hiya my love.

- I just landed in London

- Will bring your fave lunch today and we can go see a doctor.

- I love you so much! xx

It warmed her heart to see that. She sent him her lunch time.

- Yes, please.

- I'll ask later if I can take rest of the day off.

Mister⭐

- Yeah, do that baby.

- See you soon!

YN went back to her class but dismissed them early to move onto her next class with her headache boring holes into her skull from inside out. Again she had her students pointing out her jumper.

......................................................................

"How is Mrs. Styles doing?" Harry asked as soon as he stepped into her office with a bag of food from her favourite place, he carefully placed it on her desk.

It had been over a good six months of them getting married and he's still obsessed with her calling that name, especially since she had been so adamant about wanting to take up his last name. He's smitten like a little baby kitten.

"I took a painkiller for my headache but I think I still need to sleep on it." She explained, getting up from her chair and metting him halfway around her desk to take upto his welcoming hug.

"Yeah? We'll go home soon, okay?" He caressed her hair feeling her shake her head in agreement to him. "Gimme a kiss before we eat and I take you to go see doctor."

"I'm sick, don't want you to get sick." She lifted her head up to look at him.

"I literally won't get sick." He counter and got his kiss, smearing his lips onto her.

"We can actually go now, I already talked about taking a sick leave for the rest of the day and tomorrow." She shared.

"We can eat first, I know you skipped your breakfast." He made her sit down and eat as he talked about the shows she misses, which were all of them except for the London and Manchester shows. About the One Direction shirts someone threw at him which he brought with him, the other one he saved for her. Just as she was about say something, there was a knock on her door.

"Ms. YLN do you mind if I come in?" It was Mary, from the class earlier.

YN's head shot to look at her husband who looked completely unphased chowing down his noodles with his best chopsticks using abilities.

"What?" He shrugged.

"She's your fan!" She whispered. Having him caught off guard.

"Go on, I don't mind." Was his answer to her surprise.

"You sure?"

"Positive."

"Come in, Mary." YN called but not before taking another glance at Harry.

"I'm so sorry to interrupt your lunch time, Ms. YLN, I needed help with this assignment that—" the girl with blue dyed hair was completely froze to surprise seeing someone at her professor's office she never could have expected. "Oh my god!"

Harry actually chuckled earning a glance from his wife though he had his shy kode switched on there, "What do you need help with, Mary?"

"I, uhhh... I actually forgot..." She stuttered looking back and forth between the couple, printed notes in her hands, "this, this assignment— I'll come in tomorrow."

"No it's alright, I'm taking a day off tomorrow." YN shared, "don't want your assignment to be delayed."

"Oh— okay." She gulped nervously.

YN went back to her chair behind the desk and had her students doubts cleared up. Though it took her long time to realise she probably did not get a thing.

"Email me your doubts, I'll and refer to the sites I recommended." YN said, writing down a couple of referrals for online sites. "It's okay, you can talk to him."

"Oh my god, Harry! I'm such a huge fan!" Mary bursted out pointing at her Fine Line hoodie.

"Thank you so much." Harry smiled shyly.

"Can, can I ask for a picture?" Mary asked but regretted it as soon as she spoke.

"Actually do you mind if we don't? I can write you up a note." Harry suggested instead.

"That's totally fine! Oh my god, I'm so sorry!" She freaked out.

"It's alright." Harry assured her. YN smiled and handed him a pen and her sticky note pad. Harry scribbled a sweet note for the girl and signed it for her. "Thank you."

"No, thank you so much." Mary smiled accepting the note Harry gabe her.

"Mary, please don't tell anyone just yet about this if you can." Harry spoke. "Maybe wait for a few days.

"Yeah, no I won't. I really won't." The girl was freaking out, she waved at him before leaving.

"She won't tell anyone Harry, don't worry." YN assured him getting back on her previous seat next to him.

"You think so?"

"I know so." She affirmed, "I've known her for quite a long time now. She's one of the nicest students I have."

"I'm gonna take your word on that." He smiled.

"Oh, and I got my new professor's ID today." YN reached for the ID kept on her desk face down. It had her name changed on her to Prof. YN Styles which had Harry smirking.

"Still won't be able to fathom we're actually married!" His cheek muscles ached from smiling so much in the moment seeing the ID card.

"Neither can I." She chuckled.

They'd known each other for only a year when he proposed and they got married a few months later. It wasn't rushed. But it was still surreal.

Harry was still anxious about Mary trying to post about their little interactions but she didn't. Harry never saw anything on the internet about them. He was relieved to say the least.

YN students liked her enough to not talk shit about her. Plus they needed their good grades to pass out of school.

......................................................................

Tag list:

@vrittivsanghavi @buckymydarlingangel @sweetwritingfanficfriend @theroosterswife24 @sleutherclaw @melllinaa @michellekstyles @sunshinemoonsposts @marialikescherries @japanchrry @onlyangelrain @harrysgirl-1d

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joels-darlin · 9 months

Text

Bad Day

Pairings: Pedro Pascal x f!reader

Warnings: hurt, angst, shouty Pedro (if that is even a thing), comfort, fluff, mentions of anxiety/panic attack, sad Pedro.

Summary: Pedro has a bad day and you bear the brunt of his frustrations.

Word count: 1.5k

Author Note: Appreciate that RPF isn't everyone's cup of tea so feel free to keep scrolling, I always make sure when writing for Pedro that I keep it to his true character and also respectful. Just a piece I've had in-progress for awhile and I've spent far too much time on it for it to go to waste. Enjoy and as always feedback is appreciated ♥ Special thanks to @ladybess-a03 for providing your beta reading services and wisdom, also for being a continued support ♥

AO3

It wasn’t hard to pinpoint where everything had gone astray. It was early, and he had woken up in a shocking mood; the bleak, grey, rainy weather outside and lack of sleep contributing to his miserable state.

It frustrated him to know that, of all days he had to leave the house, it was for something that could have been done over the phone. Next he couldn’t find any clean socks, and eventually had to forgo his mission to find some or else he’d be running late, and instead slipped on the worn pair from yesterday. Finally, upon entering the kitchen, he noticed they were out of coffee, so it looked like he was leaving even earlier than intended to stop at Starbucks for his fix.

So safe to say when you waltzed downstairs singing ‘Morning’ in a cheery tone it rubbed him the wrong way; irritated him, in fact. Pedro grunted in response, not in the mood for talking. Observing this straight away, you opted to retreating to the bedroom to change, giving him some space for five minutes.

┈

“Hey P, any idea where my laptop charger is?” you questioned as you reached the bottom step of the stairs. You were sure it was around here after working from home yesterday. Pedro was still in the kitchen, head down on his phone, thumbs stabbing away at the screen. No response.

“P? Do yo-”

“Oh my fucking god, WHATTT?…You know what, no wonder you can’t find it, this place is a fucking mess,” he said, lifting his arms to gesture to the various items haphazardly scattered across the room, his tone laced with frustration and anger.

“Have you even cleaned up in here this week? And, to answer your question, NO, I don’t know where the damn charger is,” he snapped back, continuing his tirade of anger. Bastard.

His venomous words hung in the air, coating the room with an awkward silence, and for the first time since you’d known him you were unsure what to say next. Yeah, okay, it had been a busy week for you both. Between your day job, Pedro between filming, costume fittings, and the constant interviews and photoshoots, trying to keep on top of the house in general was impossible. It wasn’t a huge mess by any means, just well-lived in. But every evening you found that you were both were too exhausted to even attempt chores.

You weren’t sure what audacity he had to assume the job of cleaning up was solely on you, to be honest. That wasn’t at all like the Pedro you knew.

“I’m going to work,” he grunted before grabbing his car keys, the door slamming behind him on the way out.

You stood frozen to the spot, partially in shock. Pedro had never raised his voice to you; he could be stern at times but never once had he acted like this. Glad it was a work from home day, you grabbed a glass of water before heading up to the home office.

┈

Today was one of the rare occasions where Pedro opted to sit in for his coffee, holed up in the dark corner of a Starbucks in the hopes that he wouldn’t get recognised. But in his haste to leave the house, he hadn’t bothered to check the time, and realised only once he’d started driving away from your home that he was at least two hours early for his first meeting of the day. Curling his hand around the now lukewarm cup of black coffee below him, sighing outwardly, his other hand came up to card through his already messy locks.

The events of the morning back at home were playing in his head on loop. Pedro didn’t mean to act the way he did, a complete and utter asshole. The feeling of regret pooled in his stomach as soon as the words left his mouth. Unfortunately he had woken up on the wrong side of the bed and taken it out on you which was completely unfair. In your case he knew how stressful work was at the moment spending your work from home days locked in the home office, constantly nattering away in meetings between trying to get your own tasks done to please managers.

What broke his heart the most was the look of sadness, and he supposed shock, that adorned your features when he spat those words out; eyes starting to well slightly with tears, your feet rooted to the ground almost in abhorrent horror at what he’d spat out. Only now, sat in this coffee shop, was he just beginning to realise the weight of his words and how they were directed towards only you. The onus of keeping things in check was on you both. Draining the last of his coffee he sighed again, leaving his seat and disposing of the cup on the way out. He had Hell a lot of grovelling to do.

┈

So far your day was not going smoothly after the events of this morning. Everything else then seemed to fall like fucking dominoes.

First your work laptop wouldn’t turn on, and only after two hours on the phone did IT decide it was broken and that you needed to come in for a replacement (brilliant, thanks for that. Real waste of time). Secondly, once getting a replacement, you had spilt once warm coffee all over the front seat in a rush to get home. The final nail in the coffin was on your commute back from the office. Focused on just getting home so you could attempt some work today, you nearly ended up in a crash.

Through no fault of your own (your head might have been all over the place on account of Pedro’s foul mood this morning, but you always paid attention on the roads), someone ran a red light. It just missed you, and nobody was hurt, but it was a close enough call that you needed to stop before heading the rest of the way home. Pulling over into the nearest petrol station for a breather, body shaking with fright, you had debated calling Pedro at this point. But knowing he was busy in meetings, and still being mad at him, you decided against it, eventually starving off the panic attack on your own. A massive sigh of relief left your lips upon parking the car on the drive. Knowing you were in for a long evening you hunkered down in the home office playing catch up with the pile of work that got pushed aside earlier in the day.

┈

All day you had played on his mind, especially during the fourth meeting of the day. Bored out of his skull, not really contributing and more listening and making script notes, this unexpected meeting was thrown into his schedule last minute which meant he was now home later than usual.

He’d missed you to the point where it made his chest ache, wanting nothing more than to rush inside and beg on his knees for forgiveness. Putting the car in park he sighed, glancing up at the window. The office light was still on which meant you were still working; he wasn’t surprised.

Locking the door behind him and placing the keys in the bowl by the entrance, he moved slowly in search of only you. His eyes doing a quick scan of the adjoining kitchen and front room. “Still upstairs” he thought, sighing loudly, hoping you would have heard his car pulling up. What he didn’t fail to miss - the place was now immaculate. That feeling of guilt again pooled in his stomach again like it did several hours ago. Pedro sat on the couch waiting; defeated and guilty, taking his phone out as a distraction. Eventually you made your presence known, coming downstairs. He stood to attention before your feet had the chance to touch the ground floor.

“Sweetheart…I-I-” he began.

“It’s okay, P don’t worry, I’m s-” you started, but couldn’t get anything out, his words interrupting yours.

“No, no! Querida, no, I’m the one who should be apologising, I was out of line. I snapped at you because I woke up a grump…it was uncalled for and I’m sorry…please come here” he said, begging in his tone, arms outstretched.

Padding along from the other side of the room you closed the gap, practically crushing against his warm chest. His arms came around your waist in a tight hug, placing a tender kiss atop your head. A few moments just to enjoy each other's embrace.

“I can’t apologise enough, mi amor” he said softly.

“Hmmm I might just forgive you…if I can get a kiss” Moving back from his chest so you could look at his face, Pedro leant down to meet you; foreheads now touching. His hand moved from your waist to cradle your head, thumb rubbing ever so gently over your cheek.

“Never have to ask sweetheart” he whispered softly.

Smiling down at you his hand moved down to your chin taking it in between his thumb and finger, gently guiding your lips together in a tender kiss.

There was one thing for certain the bad days were worth it if they all ended like this.

#pedro pascal #pedro pascal fanfic #pedro pascal fanfiction #pedro pascal fic #pedro pascal x reader #pedro pascal x you #pedro x reader

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lincolndjarin · 2 months

Text

Oh Honey. ✩ Chapter 5

chapter five : i'll decide where to go from here

series masterlist ao3 kofi main masterlist

a/n : happy last chapter of oh honey!!!! took a while to get out bc i was briefly on hiatus and then was in a slump (whoops) but here it is. this is another case of me writing an ending before the story so this has been the intended ending since i started and i hope you all like it as much as i do

pairing : monster!joel miller x mortician!reader

rating : 18+ mdni - explicit content, read all warnings

word count : 6.4k

summary : a look into the past and present of life in honey, west virginia

warnings, etc. : language, allusions to sex, angst & fluff, complicated relationships and people who are trying to handle them, an obscene amount of flashbacks, reader has hair and is carried by Joel, several timelines in no particular order.

“C’mere, bunny.” His stubble brushes against the back of your neck, his mouth is warm as you feel a kiss placed against your spine.

“Mmm, what’s on the agenda for today?” You hum, pushing back against him a bit, the camper’s freezing in the winter, your heater broke a week ago and the parts Joel ordered to fix it won’t be in for a week. So you’re stuck with a little space heater you’d bought at the hardware store.

“I was thinkin’ we’d just do this for a while.” His arms tighten around your waist and stomach with a sigh. “We could just stay in today, order food, watch a movie on your laptop.” He yawns before nestling close against you.

“It’s too cold to stay here, it’s supposed to snow all weekend, it’s only gonna get worse. Maria even closed the home early yesterday” You groan, rolling over in his arms to press your face into his neck. The tips of your nose and ears are freezing, the two of you are under all the blankets you own, bundled up, when you peer out the window you can see the snow falling and settling on the trees.

Joel mumbles into your hair, deeply inhaling. “Why don’t you pack a bag and we can head back to the house then. You can stay until Monday and can fix the heat while you’re at work.”

“I hate staying at your place, all of my shit is here.” You spend most weekends at Joel’s, it’s easiest that way, but packing up all of your things and bringing them back and forth is getting tiring.

“Just bring it with you.”

“I think you underestimate how much stuff I need for four days.” You’re already giving yourself a headache trying to make a mental list of everything you’ll need.

“Why don’t you just move in.” He mumbles with another yawn. “It would make it easier for both of us if all your stuff was there.” It isn’t until he realizes that you’re frozen in place that he opens his eyes. “Or not, just a thought.”

You stammer an excuse, hoping to alleviate the tension that’s suddenly lingering between you. “I just- I don’t know if we’re there yet.”

“I didn’t mean to rush you, just thought I’d offer.” He shrugs before pulling you close again.

“I’m sorry.” You whisper into his chest.

“Don’t be. You’re right, it’s too soon for that.”

You’ve been together for a year now, you almost never sleep apart, if anything you should have moved in six months ago.

What’s stopping you?

You’ve been distancing yourself from any concrete commitments for sometime now and even if he never says it you know it bothers him. When do you stop punishing him for something you claim you’ve forgiven him for? He doesn’t hurt people as often anymore, at least he’s trying harder not to. But it’s getting hard for the both of you to keep up this system of locking yourselves in his room for a week every month.

Sometimes your cycle syncs with Maria and Sarah has to drive in from out of town to watch Ellie, it’s just generally become harder to manage.

But you can’t leave him when he’s like that.

On the rare occasion that you’re too exhausted to stay awake and entertain him he’ll end up in the woods and a massacred corpse ends up on your table when you return to work.

Everytime you think you’ve found forgiveness and acceptance you’re reminded of the fact that you love a monster. A selfish choice that you make every day. And everytime you tell him you can’t live with the guilt he gives you the same option.

Kill him.

You’re sure he doesn’t mean to make it sound so grim, each of you have complicated relationships with death. You just don’t think you’ll be able to live without him, and it’s not like he expects you to kill him yourself, he always tells you he’ll handle it with Tommy but you always shoot the idea down and you’re back to square one.

“I just need a little more time, I promise this isn’t forever.” You mumble as you sit up.

“I’d do anything for you, anything at all. Just tell me what to do.”

You don’t doubt that. But he still doesn’t give you what you actually want, all you ask of him is options that don’t involve him, or any more innocent people, on your cadaver cart.

The bed is empty when you wake up.

You knew it would be when you went to bed alone last night but a part of you, after all this time, still feels incomplete when the sheets beside you are cold. The creaking under the floorboards is the only noise in the house.

Your alarm clock reads 6:58 a.m. and you know it’s only a matter of minutes before you need to be up so you throw the blankets aside, stretch your arms above your head, and stand. Right on cue you hear the familiar stomping down the hall before your door swings open, Ellie rubs her eyes before scurrying over to you. Her hair’s in disarray, having fallen out of the braid you put it in last night, you scoop her up into your arms, trying to smooth the mess down.

“Good morning, little monster.” You mumble, kissing her cheek before carrying her down the hall and into the kitchen. You can’t help but wonder how much longer she’ll be small enough to hold like this. She’s already almost too heavy for you to lift for this long, and the living room and kitchen are still decorated with banners and deflating balloons from her sixth birthday party yesterday.

Kids birthdays, elementary school, home owning?

Even after a couple years it’s still a little dizzying that this is your life now. You set her down at the table, retrieving the generic sugary cereal you’ve grown fond of from the cabinet along with bowls, spoons, and milk, setting them down on the table in front of her.

“Can I feed the sheep before we go?” She says before reaching for her spoon, you nod.

“If you brush your teeth without giving me a hard time.” You fill your bowls, you have to remind her to slow down a few times as she shovels cereal into her mouth, eager to go out to the barn. You’re only halfway through your bowl when she runs off in the direction of her room.

You hear the telltale sounds of her pushing her step stool across the tile of the bathroom as she rummages through the cabinet. As you finish up your own food and tidy up you make a mental list of everything you need to do today.

Get Ellie ready for school.

Tend to the sheep.

Drive Ellie to school.

You take your phone out of your sweatpants pocket, 7:16, and text Maria to make sure they’re still good to take her this weekend. Ellie hums as she brushes her teeth when you peer into the bathroom before making your way into your own room, changing quickly, you’ve got about an hour before you need to leave.

Drive Ellie to daycare.

Grocery shopping.

Oil change.

Making lists helps. You like knowing what you’re going to do and when you’re going to do it, you’ve had enough surprises in your life, you don’t like when the routine changes. Without your routine you’d lose yourself entirely. Ellie helps, she likes structure as much as you do, you stand behind her in the bathroom now watching her finish up and making sure she did a good job. The sparkling stone on the counter catches your eye, a reminder that you’re constantly forgetting your ring. It’s a bit much for your taste but it’s a family heirloom and Joel insisted. Sliding it onto your finger as Ellie hands it to you.

Check on Ellie.

Clean the house.

Make dinner.

Before she can run back to her room you gently pull her back by the collar of her shirt, grabbing a hair tie off the counter you tie her hair in a ponytail before letting her go get dressed. By the time she’s ready you’ve got your jacket on, holding Ellie’s coat out for her to stick her arms through the sleeves. She already has a toothy grin plastered on her face as you both step out of the sliding doors leading to the backyard. You take her hand, knowing she’ll run ahead if given the chance, you know better than to let her out of her sight.

Dangerous things live in the woods of Honey.

She’s pulling you along through the short path between the trees leading to the barn with a fence surrounding it. Once you’re in the clearing you let her run ahead, once you’re able to see everything around you. The air is icy and damp as you follow after her, opening the gate as she slips under the fence. The sun is just starting to break through the trees, it’s still too cold for the sheep to be out, there isn’t much exposed grass for them to eat anyway. You’ve been keeping them in the barn most days unless it warms up, today isn’t one of those days. With a high pitched giggle Ellie rushes inside, you hear the familiar sounds of bleating as she greets all of them by name.

You watch in momentary silence as you make your own way into the barn, enjoying her little smile that warms up the freezing barn.

“Did you turn in your project yesterday?” You sit on a hay bale, watching her run amongst the sheep before turning to you, nose red from the chill. You hadn’t gotten to ask her about it since you’d been so busy with her party, it wasn’t really a “project.” Just a little assignment for the kids in her class, to draw something important to them.

Of course Ellie had wanted to draw her father, something you were happy to help with until she held the crayon in her fist and began to draw the sharp angles and pointed claws that you realized she couldn’t show it off to her class. You let her finish the drawing. It’s remarkable really, how someone so small and vulnerable can portray such a frightening creature without fear.

She loves him, that’s why.

You love him too but that doesn’t mean he didn’t terrify you. No amount of strange magical connection was going to change the fact that he scared you. The difference of course is that Ellie doesn’t know what he’s done. You had encouraged her to draw a background, concealing the mass of flesh and teeth in darkness and trees until only the two of you knew what hid behind the blue and green. Together you decided that it was a drawing of her favorite place. The national forest on the edge of town.

“Good, Riley guessed what it was though.” She says as she pats one of the lambs gently on the back.

“She guessed it was the Manangahela National Forest?” You give her a skeptical smile as she fills a bucket with feed before emptying it into the trough.

“Monongahela.” She corrects you proudly.

After all this time, you still never get it right.

“Smart ass.” You grumble under your breath as she carefully lifts the hose, filling the water buckets.

“Ass.” She says with a grin.

“Don’t say that.” You point at her sternly, stifling a laugh.

With a small huff she turns the hose off and rushes over to sit beside you and watch them.

“She said the forest was my favorite so it was easy.” She mumbles, briefly captivated by the sheep.

“She’s a good friend for knowing that.” You like Riley, you’ve watched the two girls play together several times before, she’s a good influence on Ellie as far as you can tell.

“Mhmm.” She hums, the silence returning between the two of you as you both watch the sheep.

You don’t tell her that you’re going to butcher one of them tonight.

You know that she can handle it. At this point in her life she can handle much more than any other six year old you’ve ever met but you just aren’t ready for that sort of thing yet. You haven’t been a parent long enough to know the proper way to go about that sort of thing.

“Time for school, kiddo.” You stand up abruptly and take her hand again, watching as she yells back to the sheep, saying goodbye to each and everyone of them.

The truck sits idly in the driveway but you ignore it, opening the door of your own car, Ellie throws her backpack in before climbing in herself. It was the first thing you’d bought with Darlene’s money. (The second thing you did was help Sarah with her student loans and put aside some for Ellie.) You hated driving the truck, it was too big and too loud, this just felt safer for driving Ellie around. Once she’s buckled into her seat you make your way over to the driver's side. The radio plays some rock song that immediately has her squealing in the backseat, with a grin you turn it up as you pull out of the driveway.

“Is she my mom now?”

You had been walking past Ellie’s room after your shower, wearing one of Joel’s flannels with the towel wrapped around your hair when her voice froze you in place, her bedroom door cracked open.

“That’s not exactly how that works, kiddo.” His voice has a nervous lilt to it you don’t often hear from him.

“Then why is she always here?” She sits up a bit and you hold your breath as Joel’s brow furrows.

“Is that a problem?” God you hope not.

“No, I like her.” The tension in his face relaxes with your own.

“I’m glad you do. I like her too.”

“So when will she become my mom?” Her persistence on the issue makes you feel as awkward as he currently looks.

“She’ll become your mom if she wants that. But that probably won’t happen until we’re married, and I don’t know if she wants that yet either.” There’s a beat of silence, you’re heart skipping a beat at the earnestness of the conversation. The silence is quickly interrupted by the little one screaming your name as you rush back to the bathroom, opening and shutting the door to try and make it seem like you hadn’t been listening.

“Yes, little monster?” You make a real show of stepping loudly down the hall as you push the door open. You’re greeted by the sight of Ellie trying to wriggle out of a rather flustered Joel’s arms, face red and flushed as he tries to shove her under her blankets.

“She’s just messin’ around.” He grumbles before throwing a pillow at the giggling mess.

Her voice calling your name from the backseat snaps you out of your thoughts.

“What’s up?” You turn the music down as you glance at her in the rearview mirror.

“Can Riley come over today after school if her mom says it’s okay?”

“You’re going to Uncle Tommy’s tonight, love. I’ll text her mom and see if she’s okay with picking her up from there if he gets you guys after school. Does that sound okay?” She nods happily when you look in the mirror before going back to singing along with the radio. When you pull up to the parent drop off you get out of the car to unbuckle her, kneeling down in front of her as she pulls her backpack straps over shoulders.

“Can we have a birthday party with Dad when he gets back?” She tilts her head to the side as she asks, you lean forward and kiss her on the cheek before pulling her into a hug.

“Absolutely we can.” You give her a soft smile before her attention is diverted towards a group of her friends. “Be good today, I love you.”

“Love you, bye!” She leans in to give you a kiss on your own cheek before rushing off, you watch her go, waiting until she’s in the building before getting back in the car. You send a quick text to Riley’s mom and Maria, scheduling plans for the girls before putting the car in drive as you head off towards a neighboring town. Honey has a grocery store but on days like this where you have so much free time you like to go to the nicer ones out of town.

You turn the radio off now that it’s just you, cranking the heat to keep warm as you drive in silence.

“We should get married.” You had brought the idea up, much to his surprise. About a year ago, as you were setting up for Ellie’s fifth birthday party, a year after you’d finally moved in.

“Are you serious?” He had been laying on his back, under the camper, working on the more technical aspects of the project. In his shock he’d rolled himself back out to stare at you.

Why wouldn’t you be? Sure, it took a lot of effort on his part but you finally feel like you’ve stopped holding everything against him. You had hoped that he knew that by now.

“Why not? Everyone already thinks we are, everyone at Ellie’s school calls her my daughter, Tommy’s been teasing me about it for ages-” He pulls himself to his feet, quickly putting his hands on your shoulders.

“Bunny, slow down.” He’s getting flustered, you swear his drawl is thicker when he gets like this.

“You’re the one who always says I take things too slow.” You frown, turning back to the flowers you’d been planting in the boxes under the window but he turns you back around to face him.

“You mean it?” His voice is a whisper and you quickly realize how much this means to him.

“Of course, I mean, we’re going to spend our lives together anyway, why wait.” You give him a reassuring smile as you tilt your head to kiss his cheek, briefly letting yourself indulge in the taste of his skin before pulling back. “As much as I’d love to talk about this more, we should get back to work if we want to finish this before she’s home.”

He doesn’t say anything else about it as he goes back to running the electrical under the camper and you can’t help but wonder if you crossed a line. Thankfully you’re on a time crunch to finish this and your mind is kept busy.

The two of you work in silence, almost synchronized as you move from task to task. He brings the cinder blocks out and lines the camper, creating a semi-permanent foundation as you string fairy lights along the outside and finish up planting flowers around the entire thing. Joel attaches the small porch he and Tommy made a few weeks ago that you had painted as you step inside. It’s unrecognizable after all the work the two of you put into it. The ceiling now painted a dark blue, glow in the dark paint dotted along the entire thing, when the sun goes down she’ll be able to see the stars from inside the camper. You painted the walls and changed out the curtains and sheets more to Ellie’s tastes. She’d always loved it here, when Joel was actually busy with work trips she’d stay with you in the camper. Even nowadays with you living with her and Joel she still often asks if she can play in the camper.

Just as you’re finishing up Joel steps inside as well, testing all of the faucets while wiping a bit of sweat from his brow.

“Think she’ll like it?” You ask, your fingers nervously twitch as you roll the hem of your shirt between them, he laughs as he leans back against the counter.

“She’s gonna love it, s’better than any gift I’ve ever gotten her.” You can’t help but smile as he holds his arms out towards you, you quickly step into them, leaning against his chest and taking a deep breath.

You open your mouth to speak, wanting to address your proposition from earlier quickly so it doesn’t hang in the air for too long but you hear the familiar rumble of Tommy’s truck pulling into the driveway and the two of you quickly rush out of the camper and down the steps. You straighten the bow on the door and quickly lock it. You hear Ellie’s laughter as she runs around the side of the house, Tommy and Maria walking up behind her.

She’s excited to see both of you, a paper crown announcing her birthday adorns her head as she runs up to hug her father. The second she sees the camper though she darts right past him.

“Why’s this here?” She yells excitedly, she knows exactly why it’s here instead of sitting stagnant on the piece of property you sold just a few days ago. You smile at Joel, nodding towards her as he leans down to pick her up.

“She got you a little birthday present, since you’ve been so nice to her and let her come live with us.” He points at you as she immediately starts squirming out of his grasp, tossing her backpack aside as she runs up the little porch steps. She turns around to look at you with a huge smile on her face.

“Are you fucking serious?” She screams. You can’t help it as a laugh slips out of you, thankfully Tommy can’t hold it together either as Joel immediately breaks into a lecture you nudge his shoulder as you hand her the key.

“It’s her birthday, she’s allowed to say it on her birthday.” You murmur through your continued laughter. She wraps her arms around your legs, hugging you tightly before turning around and unlocking the door. “Happy birthday, Ellie.”

She had loved her party, thankfully. And she loved her new playhouse much to your relief.

You and Joel laid on opposite sides of her as her little snores filled the camper, she had wanted a campout as a birthday treat and you were both more than willing to oblige. You’re staring up at the faintly glowing stars painted on the ceiling when he sets the box down next to you. You grab it, wanting to ask him more but not wanting to wake Ellie up you open it.

And you’re met with a ridiculously gorgeous ring.

Clearly an heirloom but he’s recently had it polished, one large diamond framed by two smaller ones on either side of it. Your eyes are wide as you stare down at it, shimmering in the moon light before sharply turning your head to the man with a dopey smile lying across from you.

“Been carrying that around for a while now, if I’d known you were ready I would’a asked sooner.” His voice is low as Ellie stirs a bit and you both freeze as she rolls over closer to her father.

Neither one of you speaks again, but the look on your face as you put the ring on was answer enough.

The beeping brings you back to reality as you scan every item in the self checkout lane.

You’re only feeding yourself while Ellie’s with Maria and Tommy, so you keep it simple. Another box of cereal, milk, an apple, a loaf of bread and deli meats. You’re pretty sure you have enough cheese and other essentials to get you through the rest of the weekend. On your way up to the checkout counter you grab a bag of dark roast coffee beans and a box of tampons.

You’re out of both.

You know you live in memories too often, especially without Joel to keep you in reality. You find him in the past when he isn’t beside you because something needs to fill the aching void that yearns for his smell, his taste, and his touch. And echoes of Joel are almost as good as the real thing. There’s a funny comfort you find in memories. Even unhappy ones. There’s no surprises in memories, you know what’s going to happen and you know you survived it.

Even the bad memories bring you comfort when he isn’t around to do it himself.

You pay quickly, loading everything into the cooler in the car as you head off in the direction of your mechanic. When you park you’re told it’ll take about fifteen minutes, nodding as you sit in the waiting room, where your mind inevitably wanders to one of the worst memories in the hours following your meeting in the Applebees that has since closed.

You didn’t pay attention to the road.

Instead you stared at your hands in your lap as he drove, not bothering with the radio, the two of you stewing in your silence as he pulled into the driveway. You didn’t even unbuckle your seatbelt, he had come around the truck and done that for you, pulling you into his arms and carrying you bridal style up the porch steps and into the house, only stopping to kick the door shut before bringing you to his room, clicking on the lamp he hadn’t bothered to remove, and setting you on the mattress.

He lays down beside you, taking your face in his hands but you immediately recoil, pushing him away.

“What do I have to do to earn your forgiveness? To show you I’m sorry? Cause I don’t see a point to any of this if it’s never going to happen, it’ll be better for both of us if we know where we stand.” He’s right, unfortunately. Neither one of you deserves to waste the other's time if this is going to mean nothing.

If you can’t forgive him.

“Can you at least let me love you? Do you think you can manage that?” His voice is dangerously close to cracking and you have to pray that he doesn’t break. If he can’t hold it together you know you won’t be able to either. “Neither one of us wants to deal with this but we don’t have a choice.”

“I don’t know.” You mumble, you really don’t know so why answer with anything else?

“I don’t even need a concrete answer, bunny. I just need to know if someday you’re going to be able to forgive me. I can’t live a life where you keep me at arms length.”

You hadn’t responded. Just slid closer to him.

And you let him hold you until you fell asleep, hoping that would be enough.

Your phone buzzing is what snaps you out of your empty thoughts this time. When you open the notification you’re met with a message from Maria, a photo of Tommy sleeping in the recliner, Ellie sitting in his lap, and Riley sitting on the arm of the chair, watching whatever movie they put on the T.V.

[ Made it back from school. Watching Treasure Planet. ]

[ love it ] [ thanks again for taking them ]

The mechanic returns shortly after, handing you your keys and telling you you’re good to go. The hour drive back isn’t terrible, you opt to listen to music on the way back. It’s quiet when you return home. Putting away the groceries and making yourself a sandwich as you look around the cluttering remnants of the party yesterday, the only sounds are your chewing and the soft creaking and scratching from under the floorboards.

Joel has so much pride for your home. He would hate it if he knew how dirty it was currently, the thought alone has you reaching for an empty trash bag once you’re finished eating.

You turn all the lights on as the sun starts to set, how much time did you spend daydreaming today? You try not to think too hard about it as you start cleaning up the plastic cups and paper plates that litter every surface of the living room, popping deflating balloons and sweeping up discarded streamers and confetti. There’s a feeling of solace that comes with cleaning the house, making it feel like home once more.

This isn’t just Joel’s house now, it’s yours as well, even if you thought this would never be the case.

“I know that you shot down the idea last time but I want to show you something.”

“Joel, I just don’t think…” Your voice trails off as you stare at the key ring he’s holding out towards you. If you can’t guarantee that he won’t hurt people you can’t share a home with him, it’s stupid and it makes you feel childish but you can’t come home to him knowing people are still dying, even if you can’t stay away from him.

“Just give me a chance to show you.” He puts the keys back into his pocket before taking your hand. Walking you down the hall towards his room, he stops briefly to check in on Ellie, still tucked into her own bed as you peer into her room before he closes her door quietly. “I don’t want you to think that a life with me is going to be only horrors, and I know that a part of you has already resigned yourself to such a thing but you don’t deserve that.” You’re about to interrupt him, tell him that’s not true despite the ache in your chest that tells you he’s right but he’s opening his own bedroom door and you’re too busy staring slack jawed inside.

It’s unrecognizable from the monster cage he’d created for himself.

Instead of resting bare and on the floor, the mattress has sheets and now rests on a low to the ground metal frame. The photos that were once taped to the wall are now in frames or pinned to a bulletin board he hung up.

He put a rug down that covers any claw marks on the floor and he’s done his best to hang up photos and paintings over the scratches on the walls. There’s even furniture now, a nightstand on either side of the bed with a matching dresser, lamps scattered around the room make the space feel warm and lived in.

“You- you did all this?”

“If you live with me I don’t want you to have to sleep in some sort of creepy homemade dungeon, you deserve an actual bedroom.” He whispers as you look at the paintings on the wall, all of them are Alice in Wonderland themed. “I borrowed those from Sarah’s room, we can change them out when- if you move in.” He quickly mumbles as you look up at a painting of Alice staring into a lake, her own image being reflected back up at her.

“It’s lovely, it’s perfect Joel.” You turn back to him as he rubs the back of his neck bashfully.

“This ain’t it, there's a few more surprises for you.” The shocked look remains on your face as he takes your hand once more, bringing you back into the kitchen and out the sliding glass door.

You had run outside without shoes on and took down the banner hanging on the camper before rushing back in and tossing it in the trash bag. When you look at the clock it’s just a couple minutes from 7:00 p.m. You bring the bag out to the porch before washing your hands.

You don’t bother taking a shower as you change into your pajamas, setting your ring on your nightstand, not wanting to risk damaging it as you pull up a pair of sweats you don’t care about being ruined and an old shirt you wore when you painted the bathroom a month ago. Grabbing the apple off the counter you shove it into your sweatpants pocket. Shooting Maria one last text and turning your phone on do not disturb, you tell her to say goodnight to Ellie for you before slipping your sneakers on and heading out the back door once more.

You don’t like going to the barn alone, and you should have put on a proper jacket, without the sun to warm you, your skin prickles with goosebumps. The dark doesn’t frighten you very much anymore, and it’s easy to follow the familiar path even in the dark. Your phone flashlight illuminates the ground in front of you as you walk, you’re trying to remember if there is a specific sheep Ellie isn’t attached to.

Most of the flock is sleeping save for a few stragglers, you decide not to overthink it, grabbing a lead and putting it over the head of the first sheep that’s brave enough to greet you. The unlucky winner is one of the older sheep, making its way over to you the second you open the gate. You reward her bravery with the apple in your pocket, the only sounds in the quiet night are those of chewing as you walk her back towards the house.

You swung your intertwined hands between the two of you as you walked through the trees behind his house. He must have worked startlingly fast to do that for you, no ones ever put in that sort of effort for you before.

The sun is just starting to set behind you as he takes a step back and covers your eyes.

“Hey-” You start to object with a giggle as he continues walking you forward.

“Oh hush, let this be a surprise.” He chuckles as he leads you further down the path before stopping abruptly and lifting his hands. “Surprise.” He whispers, taking a step back.

“Woah.” You exhale in shock as you stare at the barn in front of you. A white fence surrounding it.

It’s beautiful.

“Tommy and I grew up on a farm, we can raise whatever you want, pigs, sheep, chickens, anything you want.” He mumbles as he wraps his arms around you from behind, kissing your cheek.

“I love that idea, but can I ask why?” You let out a nervous laugh as you turn to raise an eyebrow at him.

“That’s actually a part of your last surprise.”

“Another?” Your voice pitches up, he built you a fucking barn, what else could he have done for you?

“I want you to know how serious I am about you moving in, I don’t want you to have any doubt.” He mumbles against your temple, inhaling deeply before pulling away and taking your hand one more time. “Come on.” He pulls you back towards the house as the sun sets for good, you walk in the darkness until he brings you to the basement entrance and pulls out the keys he’d offered you.

Several locks adorn the basement entrance, you sift through your key ring until you find each lock's respective key, letting them drop into the grass as you remove each one. When you swing the heavy metal doors open you’re met with the welcoming warmth that comes from below. Several lamps and space heaters create a warm glow that beckons you down the steps. Almost immediately the sheep pulls away, bleating fearfully. Animals are far more intelligent than anyone gives them credit for, they know when something is wrong.

You pull her down with you then reach up and let the doors slam down, sealing the poor thing in its tomb with you.

You drop the lead once the doors are closed, there’s no point in leading the lamb any closer to the inevitable slaughter.

“I have loved you since I first saw you in that bar. I have loved you every moment since, you could be cruel and terrible and I’d love you still and I’d probably deserve it. But you aren’t. You’re smart, and you care about everything, and you love everyone even if they aren’t worthy of it.” His hands caress your face as he whispers into the night air. “And you feel so much guilt for the things I do even though you shouldn’t. You can forgive me for all that I’ve done but it won’t change the fact that I’m still doing terrible things. I’ve done terrible things for so long that I didn’t really consider any other options, but you deserve other options.”

He pulls open the basement doors once all the locks are undone, and offers his hand to you.

“I want to show you that I can change, that I would do anything you need me to do, be anything you need me to be.”

It’s your choice, take it or leave, he won’t hold it against you if you crack and can’t handle it anymore. But you need him to keep yourself together in the first place so you take his calloused hand in yours and let him lead you down into the darkness.

The smell of vanilla and pine is dense down here.

As you descend further down the steps you see the familiar set up, a few lamps and lanterns are scattered throughout the darkness as well as a couple space heaters that are only there for your benefit. A mattress you insist on putting sheets on is pushed against one of the scratched up walls, the blankets and pillows scattered about the space, you walk over to the mess, picking up the scattered quilts as you throw everything back down on the mattress. You can feel the movement behind you, the scratching against the cement as you lay down, even with the heaters it’s cold. Thankfully you know you’ll be warm enough soon.

The panicked baa’s of the sheep are swiftly silenced, replaced with the wet tearing sound that once would have filled you with dread. It’s a bit morbid how comforting you now find them, you roll over as you pull another blanket up over yourself, watching the iron chains drag across the floor as the unseen figure pulls them in different directions.

You can see movement dancing on the edges of the lamp light, the smell of blood is almost as prominent now as the suffocating sweetness. A smile begins to tease the corners of your mouth as you hear him moving closer, the familiar, gravely voice that calls out from the dark recesses of the basement fills your ears like warm honey.

“C’mere, bunny.”

a/n : that's a wrap on oh honey folks, once again im sorry i made yall wait so long, i hope it was worth it <3

i no longer have a tag list but for fic updates follow @lincolndjarinnotifs !!

#lincolndjarin #joel miller #tlou #the last of us #joel miller x reader #joel miller smut #joel miller x you #joel miller fanfiction #joel miller fic #tlou hbo #joel tlou #the last of us hbo #monster fucker #monster lover #monster romance #oh honey #fic : oh honey

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jokeroutsubs · 9 months

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Joker Out between dreams and reality (Val 202: Music 202) - Part 1: Bojan and Jan

Today, 3.08.2023, Slovenian national radio station Val 202 broadcasted a recent interview with Joker Out members Bojan Cvjetićanin and Jan Peteh. Below is the translation of the interview, which you can listen in the audio file above, or on this direct link.

Interviewer: Joker Out, the five-man band that sent Slovenia into a frenzy and is well on their way to sending Europe into a frenzy too. After their Eurovision performance in Liverpool, a lot of doors opened to Bojan, Kris, Jan, Nace and Jure. And Joker Out are stepping through all of them with decisive steps. Massive crowds at their concerts at home and abroad, concerts until the end of the year in Serbia, Croatia, Poland, Scandinavia that sold out in minutes, and crowds of dedicated fans around the world who seem to know all the lyrics by heart, even though Slovenian is far from familiar to them. I talked about all that with Bojan Cvjetićanin and Jan Peteh, two of the founding members of Joker Out. To start with, I asked them whether they’re living their dreams.

Jan: Fortunately, we're living more than our dreams, we’re living our lives. Bur what’s happening right now was still a dream not so long ago, yeah.

Bojan: I passed the Museum of Modern Art yesterday and saw that they currently have an exhibition called “Don’t dream your dreams”, so… it’s better to live them.

How are you absorbing everything that’s happening right now? A Slovenian band that’s, let’s say, more “midstream”, has never managed to do what you’re doing right now. Are you watching that with excitement, wonder, maybe even fear?

Bojan: Yeah, it all definitely caught us a little unawares. It’s true that everything that’s happening now was absolutely our aspiration when we decided that we wanted to go to Eurovision this year. And what we secretly and not-so-secretly wanted really came true. But I’d say that you cannot be prepared for all that to really happen. It’s truly crazy to follow these moments when we announce a concert abroad in some city, often in cities we’ve never even been to, and before we can even all post “juhuhu”, it’s sometimes already sold out, so… I mean, damn.

Jan: Never in my life could I have imagined that I’d see a full venue in Glasgow or London sing our songs in Slovenian, so moments like that are definitely the highlight of every week and month. But then there’s a big contrast when you come from that somewhat surrealistic experience into the quiet of your own home, and you’re at home for a few hours. Because you don’t know if this is real life or just a dream, or if you’re shifting between them. So it’s unusual, but… I’m enjoying it immensely.

Jan has pointed out that even abroad, fans sing Joker Out songs in Slovenian. After one of their recent concerts in the UK, I saw a comment on social media that went something like this: “I didn’t understand a word, but that was the best concert in my life.”

Jan: That’s what Bojan says at the start of every concert, “prepare to not understand a word for the next hour and a half.” But people are screaming, enjoying themselves. And some even pretend to understand the songs, even though they probably don’t.

Bojan: Well, that’s the main point of music, right? Music is special exactly because you don’t have to understand it, you just have to feel it. But it is weird for us because we’re not used to this happening with Slovenian language. Especially because… really from the moment we started making music, everyone was telling us that first of all, with Slovenian you can’t even make it in Slovenia, second of all, absolutely no way you could make it in the Balkans, and we’re not even going to talk about breaking into other foreign countries.

Bojan says that even with the upcoming songs, and hence with the new third album, they will not forget their mother tongue. Especially because they recognise you can achieve a lot even if you don't sing exclusively in English. Their ambition to tell an even bigger story, to expand to larger venues and to have a new, larger fan base is turning things around.

Bojan: As you mentioned in the beginning, we are a mainstream band. In mainstream music it is always a good idea to include the masses and make your music easily accessible to them. We have witnessed an initial push of interest after Eurovision, with some fans genuinely drawn to us as musicians. They're really, really committed to learning the material, because they want to come to the gigs and enjoy themselves. They're taking it to the max and that's phenomenal. And it's also our aspiration to grow. After all, writing songs in different languages is, by definition, a kind of musical experiment.

Kris (in the background): And a challenge.

Bojan: Yes, absolutely a challenge. We're not setting off to write the third album as an English only album, of course. We've decided that we want to do a multilingual album, it will absolutely include Slovene, Serbian and English, and hopefully include some Spanish and French language as well. That is something we want to play with.

Not only Slovenian and English, the other languages represent a challenge as well, say Joker Out. Speaking of the third album, it's already, let's say, marinating, in the making. Joker Out is also a band that has not suffered the so-called curse of the second album. It was, dare I say it, was even better than the debut. Are you concerned about the possible third album curse?

Jan: Our Demons have obviously defeated the curse of the second album. As for the progress of the third album, we recently had our first really creative rehearsals since December, when we were working on Carpe Diem in Hamburg. From then on, we've accumulated so much creative potential, that it simply poured out of us during those few rehearsals. Now each time we get to our rehearsal space, our need to create becomes so intense that I think if we keep this up, we won't have to worry about the demons of the third album either.

As Jan points out, they are not lacking in creative inspiration. Bojan agrees, adding that in recent months they have often been 'emotionally shocked'. This means that emotions have boiled up and things that they were not used to before have been happening, which made it difficult to process certain situations. Last week, Joker Out parted ways with one of the members of their core team, who found himself under an avalanche of criticism, especially on social media, for inappropriate behaviour. The news of the termination of the collaboration was followed by many thanks from fans that the band members had not only heard the message, but had also taken action about it.

Bojan: Yes. We have really had a very, very complex situation that we have always hoped would never happen to us, but as we said in the statement, we hope and believe that it will never happen again. What has happened was that one of our team members has created an unpleasant atmosphere with our fans, with our listeners, in a repetitive, how shall I say... Pattern. He often chose the wrong words, and this in turn led to many feeling, I would say, unpleasant, uncomfortable. Both at our concerts and on social media. And that is something that is absolutely unacceptable for us. We have always tried to put 1000% positive energy out at our concerts and share it with people, and the people also gave that energy back to us, so any disruption of that process is, as I said, unacceptable to us. And we absolutely had to say goodbye to this member.

The singer of Joker Out says it was the right decision and the band stands by it, adding that they have learned a lot from this experience. If nothing else, they have realized the true power of social media. They have learnt that it can bring a lot of good things, but there are also a lot of bad things that you can't be prepared for.

Bojan: I have to say that, yes, I've withdrawn from social media now, because I want to make this album under positive influences, not negative influences, and really, on social media I feel like I'm trapped in a world that I don't really want to be trapped in. So, yeah, for example, let's say two days ago, I was really negatively shocked, or affected by a moment when... We had a concert in Ptuj, which was a really specific experience, because I was having a panic attack on stage for an hour and a half, and I was just thinking about whether or not I was going to faint or not. I don't know why, whether it was the air, whether it was too much coffee, or what happened, but it really wasn't a pleasant concert for me, so within 20 minutes after the show I was rushing home, right. But on Twitter there was this post, some girl who said that I... that some security guard or somebody on my behalf invited her backstage after the concert. Which, whoever was there, including the organiser, knows wasn't even remotely true, because as soon as I got out of the shower, hands shaking, I got into the van and went home, sitting next to Nace, bag in hand, so as not to throw up right there in the car. So, there are some things we are not prepared for. There are dimensions that are a whole new world for us.

In the second part of the interview with Joker Out on "Val 202" (name of the radio station, "Wave 202"), we're sticking to departures and leaving. Joker Out is a group where two band members were replaced in the past seven years. The drummer Matic was replaced with Jure and the bassist Martin with Nace. That's why I am interested in how replacements influence the group or rather the ahmosphere in the group. A music group has to breathe as one. Jan says that each member brings a different energy to the team. He's convinced that one half of the first album and the whole second album would have sounded totally different if the drummer Jure hadn't joined them.

Jan: At this point, I'm simply happy that it happened, and it goes for Nace as well. Because now, I can hardly imagine two better persons for this band or better friends.

Jure (in the background): Awww!

Bojan: The fact is, members leaving a band is definitely a very difficult thing. We've had five members in the band since its creation. And as Jan said, when the energy changes, the balance that was there gets disrupted. Now there are only two possible scenarios. One is that the new energy is less suitable for the collective and the whole balance is brought down. Or that it is more positive and elevates the whole thing. I believe the universe helped us somehow; in both cases the energies that joined us, pushed us into new realms of creativity, positivity, literally everything in a very short time. So, I know that everything happened here just the way it had to happen. Even if you ask Martin, who just left the band, because he wanted to pursue another path in his life. You can ask him now, I know, because I live with him, because we are roommates. He is the luckiest man because, in the same short time that we have started branching out in new directions, his personal spheres have taken off in the best possible way, and he is, as we say, kicking ass. We can say that by 2023, everything that went on has happened as it should have.

Everything happened like it was supposed to happen, says Bojan. Also in Liverpool on the Eurovision stage. Barely three months later, Joker Out are living the life they could have only dreamed about. Masses of fans, sold out concerts and a feeling that only the sky is the limit. Is the current success partly or solely due to Eurovision, that's our next topic.

Bojan: It's absolutely not just a consequence of what happened in Liverpool because that was just one big catalyst for everything that we've been doing as a band since the beginning. (It also has to do with) how we dealt with Liverpool. Because what is happening today, as I said, was planned. We didn't know to what extent it was going to be realized, but it was a plan. Liverpool has made a difference for us in a way that no other night in this world can make because it has literally brought us, in one night, bizarre numbers of new audiences that we could not have imagined before. So, in one sense, yes, that is what Eurovision did for us; we cannot deny it. But on the other hand, it was us who did it.

Jan: In harmony, Eurovision and Joker Out, hand in hand.

Bojan: Together forever Joker Out, hand in hand.

Jan: *singing* # Together forever #

Together forever. Behind the group Joker Out is 7 years of creating. For the very end, a question, where do they see themselves in 7 years.

Jan: Now I've had a couple of people ask me recently how do you handle it when there's so much going on. To me, it seems like a primary school experience, where every year, the new grade is a little bit harder, but you're also evolving from the previous years. So, if we were thrown from zero to where we are now, we wouldn't even know where to begin. We have quite a bit of experience behind us now. It's a very steep road, exponentially growing, mathematically speaking, and I'm glad that we are at a point where nobody is confining us to a certain determined path that we should follow, but it's all up to our own volition. Whatever we decide to do, we will do, and I think that we can be very happy about this kind of artistic freedom. So, I'm also very excited and eagerly awaiting to see where this will take us.

Bojan: Here, Jure is suggesting that in 7 years we'll be doing Wembley. There was an idea that we should book Wembley now for the year 2030 and we release the tickets today. It would be the first concert in the world, where the tickets would be sold 7 years in advance. Then we'll wait and see what happens. If something will happen, it'll happen; if not ... it will get canceled due to illness.

All: (laughter)

Translation cr: @kurooscoffee, @beeoftheanxieties, drumbeat, +2 anonymous jokeroutsubs members

#joker out #jokeroutsubs #bojan cvjeticanin #jan peteh #martin jurkovic #nace jordan #jure macek #kris gustin #please let us know if you notice any inaccuracies or mistranslations #we really tried to do our best while at the same time getting this done asap bc of its topicality

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nezuscribe · 2 years

Text

𝐟𝐚𝐧 𝐛𝐞𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐢𝐨𝐫

pairings: eddie munson x fem!reader

summary: it's not expected of the head cheerleader to go to the run-down bar to watch eddie munsons' band. but it's also not expected of the two of you to ever meet. and what can eddie do, ignore his number one fan?

fic warnings (mdni 18+): reader is over 18, smut, blow jobs, messy make-outs, oral sex (fem and male receiving), fingering, teasing, cum eating, unprotected piv, Eddie kind of having a corruption kink but when does he never

Friday nights. That’s when they play. Leather jackets, smudged eyeliner, voices all yelling in harmony as they play for their usuals, you included. Sometimes they were a bit off beat, or just completely forgot the lyrics, but it didn’t stop you from coming back every week, soda in hand as you giggled at their funny antics before and after the show.

And you’d also be lying to yourself if you thought that the only reason you were coming was because of their little jokes. Because deep down you knew that the lead guitarist had caught your eye ever since you first saw him.

You couldn’t lie, Eddie Munson was just irresistible.

And yes, by your school, (and society’s) standard, Eddie Munson was supposed to be untouchable, and not in a good way. You were supposed to avoid him like the plague, pretend like his sort never existed, and get along with your day. He was satanic, or so your mother would say as she angrily chopped her vegetables, and was the leader of your highschools so-called “cult”.

You called bull, but you knew it would take a lot more than logical thinking to convince the town of Hawkins that the Hellfire Club didn’t exactly keep true to its name.

So after a lucky mistake, you found yourself searching for cheap food and stumbled across the mangy bar, not expecting to find your school's most decorated student riffing on his electric guitar.

Unlike you, Eddie could still recall that night almost like it happened yesterday. It was rather crowded, meaning that there were more than five people filling the empty seats as he introduced the band and what they were going to sing. His eye scanned the crowd, almost like they almost did, but they stopped, widening for a second in recognition.

“This song's a cover from the one and only…” He trailed off, his hand wrapped around the microphone loosening when he saw you sitting in the crowd, Hawkins High’s golden girl, still in your cheer uniform from practice as he stammered, getting a hold of himself as he cleared his throat and mumbled out a quiet; “Black Sabbath.”

He thought that maybe you were here for a date, but you looked relatively cheery for being there by yourself, giving them encouraging claps whenever they’d start a new song, obviously enjoying your time as you munched on the complimentary chips.

Eddie thought it was strange, sure, but he figured that you came that night out of ennui. But you kept reappearing every Friday, getting familiar with the people as you stayed up to midnight to listen to them sing. He knew that while he tried to convince himself that this band was going places, he knew that they weren’t professional or all that good; so you must have been really bored to come here in your free time.

For him, it was definitely new. Out of all people to keep coming back to their shows, he never would have bet his money on you. You who always kept your shoes and clothing clean and painted your nails a light baby pink as you walked around school flashing everybody who passed you by a friendly smile.

It eventually became a standard for you to go, though, feeling almost as if it were rude had you been a no-show. Clad in that green skirt, your cheer logo stamped on the jacket as you walked through the door, giving the woman behind the counter a grin as she waved to you.

“May I have a diet coke?” You ask, leaning over the counter as you tap your shoes on the floor in a little beat, “Please?”

“F’course,” She gave you a kind wink as she slid it over, the drink already prepared because, at this point, everybody knew that you were coming and what you liked to order.

“Thanks Suz,” You pay, pulling out a straw from the holder as you make your way over to your regular spot, drinking a little bit to quench your thirst. You looked around, noting that it was emptier than usual, but maybe this Friday people just weren’t up for metal music and room-temperature beer.

But the more closely you looked, the more confused you got. The stage was empty, which wasn’t unusual, but none of their usual pieces of equipment were up there, instead replaced by a lone maraca resting on a stool. And you were sure that the last time you checked, none of the four members used that instrument.

Your forehead wrinkled in bewilderment,

“Hey, Suz?” You called out as you turned in your seat, looking over to see him cleaning out a cup, “Are they playing tonight?”

She opened her mouth to speak but paused as her gaze fell to something behind you, giving you a knowing grin, jutting her chin to something behind you as she went back to cleaning her cup.

“Sorry, but,” You perked in your seat at the familiar voice, glancing back to see Eddie Munson standing right there, hovering over the seat next to you as he gave you an apologetic look, “Gareth’s got carpal tunnel at the moment. Can’t really work any magic on the drums when the hand holding the wand is immobile.”

Your eyes widen for a second, mouth running dry as if the weeks of preparing yourself to just talk to him had fallen short on you. He leaned against your little table, staring at you through furrowed grows as you gaped up at him.

“Oh…” You swallowed, rubbing nervously at your nose as you gave him an awkward chuckle, “Well, that um, that - that sucks.” And you watch as Eddie grins boyishly at your stammering, clicking his tongue against his teeth.

“Tell me about it.”

You feel like your heart was about to beat out of your chest, the silly little crush that was growing on the boy surely about to be the death of you as you try to adjust yourself to look less gauche. It was stupid, really, just how minuscule you felt under his gaze, and even when he’d walk by you could feel your body heat up. You watched through nervous eyes as he silently motions to the empty seat next to you, a quiet question as you slowly nod.

“Fortunately, Per said he’d fill in on the, uh…” He motioned his hands to the maracas, “Cha-cha instruments.” A small giggle falls past your lips as you snort into your drink, some of the soda splashing on your cheeks as Eddie grins in triumph.

“Per?”

“Yeah, well, his name’s Casper but…” He shrugged, his nose wrinkling, “I can’t say that name without thinking of Casper the friendly ghost.” And your already contagious smile grows as you lean a bit on the table, your hand rubbing at the little beads of water falling down the sides of your drink.

He stared at you for while you took another tentative sip, your fingers drumming on the table as you rubbed at your nose. Yeah, he thought, you were really pretty up close.

“So…” You bit your lip as you tried to think of what to say, your leg bouncing up and down as you looked up at him, “When do you think you’ll be able to play?”

Eddie couldn’t help but feel his lips tilt upwards at your genuine curiosity, pursing his lips as he tried to think.

“A week, maybe two. Don’t sweat on it, Gareth’s got abnormal healing time.”

You nod, biting the inside of your cheek, trying to contain your smile. You glance away as you twirl the straw around in your drink, the afternoon sun lighting up your features as Eddie stares at you, unknowingly. He couldn't help it. He thought you’d be off-put by him, giving him a short answer as you slowly pretended like he didn’t exist, but he wasn’t prepared to be bombarded with the same treatment you give everybody else.

“What about you?” He sits up in his seat at the question as you take another sip, looking him in the eyes as you wait for an answer.

“What about me?” He says through a little laugh, tilting his head to the side as you duck your chin down in embarrassment, heat flooding your cheeks under his scrutinizing gaze.

“Your fingers,” You muttered as you pointed to his hand, “Don’t they hurt? With playing the guitar and all?”

He looked down at his fingertips, the little indents from the guitar strings still there even after days of not playing, but he waves it off.

“Soak them in ice-cold water right afterward and don’t feel a thing,” He pauses, scratching his chin, “Might be because my fingers go numb from the cold, but it works.” You laugh again, the sound sweet and soft as a bell as your eyes wrinkle around the edges, your cheeks pulled up in the fullest way and he can’t help but understand why everybody at the school loved you so much.

“Y/n.” You say, sticking out your hand, your palm facing the left as you sit up a bit straighter in your seat. Eddie huffs, his hand grasping yours as shakes it lightly, his fingers lingering on the back of your hand.

“Eddie.” He mirrors and you give him a sheepish smile, embarrassed as you nod.

“I know. I’ve been coming here, and it’s-” You swallowed as your fingers fiddled with each other, “It’s hard to miss your name.”

Eddie contains a grin, cocking a brow at you as he interlaces his hands together, leaning back in his seat as he rubs at the corner of his eyes, the little dimples on the sides of his face about to make an appearance as you wait for him to say anything.

“Yeah,” He shakes his head in disbelief as he lets out another chuckle, “Yeah it’s kinda hard to believe that if I’m being totally honest.”

Your little smile falls as concern fills in.

“Hard to…believe?”

He nods, his curls bouncing as he tucks some of his loose hair behind his ear, fidgeting with some of his rings as he clicks his tongue, leaning into the table as you nervously sip on your drink.

“Well, the golden girl of Hawkins High just never really struck me as the type of person to…enjoy metal music, with the, y’know…” Eddie explains as he imitated pom-poms and you roll your eyes as you twirled the ice around, watching as the bubbles of carbonation rose to the top and popped.

“You guys do play a lot of Ozzy for die-hard metal fans. I’d prefer a bit of Pantera or Anthrax but,” You shrugged, never breaking eye contact as you take a sip, “I guess I’m just not into it as much as you are.”

Eddie almost choked on his spit, his eyes widening as you innocently looked up, a teasing smile on your face as you soaked in his reaction. Fuck, he was a total goner now. The biggest fool to underestimate just how much a grasp you could have on him in seconds because you knew his music. Knew it well enough that he could barely think of a witty comeback that could save him from this embarrassment. And you were easily using that as leverage against him.

He hated how he thought that maybe he could twist you over, see just what you were up to because surely you couldn’t be coming to their gigs out of enjoyment. But maybe he was being small-minded, and maybe that small-mindedness was coming back to bite him.

“You’re just full of surprises, aren’t you?” He rubbed at his chin, perplexed by you who was sitting right there in front of him.

“I like keeping people on their toes.”

Eddie chuckled, shaking his head in disbelief as your hands fiddled with the delicate necklace you wore, moving the pendant around as Eddie tried his best to keep his eyes glued onto your face. But he felt as though you were teasing, maybe even testing him as his gaze dropped a bit, his eyes glazing over as you smirked consciously.

“Wanna see it?” He asks suddenly, and your brows instantly furrow in confusion. Eddie seemed to have been snapped out of his trance, happy to know that he caught you off-guard with his question.

“See what, Munson?” Though it could have been a genuine question, heat crawled up his neck as you used his last name, something ne never realized could sound so sweet falling off your tongue, and it took him an embarrassing couple of seconds to remember what the original question even was.

He stammered, and you tilted your head to the side, worried for him as he cracked his fingers, “The vessel that carries sound to showcase all that is good and holy with the world.” And damn you were fast to figure out what he meant because you waved off his exaggerated speech with a hand, your fingers grazing him as your shoulder shook with laughter.

“You mean your guitar?”

“Sure, if that’s what they’re calling it these days.”

Rolling your eyes you let out another giggle, ducking your head as you fiddle with the hem of your skirt, never expecting your little interaction with Eddie to go this far as he sat there waiting for your answer.

“Depends. Where is she?” Eddie smiles at your wording.

“This place is very accommodating to its attendees. She’s still in the backroom.” You purse your lips, your eyes giving away your pure excitement as you shrug unbiasedly, but Eddie could tell that you had already given in to his offer.

“Show the way,” You say, standing up from your seat as you pass Suz your empty cup, pulling at your skirt and uniform as you wait for him, “Rockstar.”

Eddie quietly groans, his eyes shutting for a second as he covers it up with a lame cough, missing the way you smiled triumphantly to yourself. Eddie muttered a couple of things to Suz, throwing her a thumbs up as the old lady sighed, shaking her head as she went back to cleaning the cups.

You felt a lingering warmth on your back, tentative and unsure as Eddie looked down at you, his doe eyes almost worried that you’d quickly change your mind and leave. But you just looked back up at him, almost defiantly as you squirm around, impatient as you wait for him to show the way.

“This way,” He jutted his chin towards one of the back doors, maneuvering around the sea of chairs and tables as he trailed a bit in front of you, opening the door with a happy little grin, seeing that they still hadn’t locked it yet.

You followed him down a small halfway, stopping at another door as he jiggled the knob around, a sigh of relief escaping his lips. Partially because he knew his guitar was in there and didn’t want to go through the trouble of breaking down another door to get it.

The room was cramped, with a tiny little couch up against one wall, a mirror, and a chair facing you as you looked around in curiosity. You saw Eddie head for a black case resting on the couch, and you quietly shut the door behind you, a little bit awkward as you wondered to yourself what you were doing.

“There she is…” Eddie murmured to himself, gently taking his guitar out while he proudly showed it off, his hands gentle as he watched your face break into a big grin. You walked over, crouching down by the couch to get a closer look.

“Holy shit,” Your fingers hovered over the gloss, careful not to touch it as you looked at him in approval, “Warlock. You’ve got taste, Munson.”

Eddie’s heart squeezed his throat in a grip because how could he talk to you now? Knowing that you could dominate over every single field and he’d probably have zero knowledge in comparison to you.

“Y-yeah, you could say that. Either that or I just hate my savings.” You giggle, shaking your head as you sit back down, careful that your skirt didn’t move that much as your palm ran over the carpet.

“You’re dedicated.” You correct him and Eddie gives you a goofy smile, putting his hair behind his shoulder as he stares at his guitar and then back to you. There was a beat of silence, and you tapped your shoe on the ground, debating on whether or not to tell him something that had been weighing on your mind.

“I have a question.”

Eddie cocks a brow, stopping as he was mid-putting his guitar back in the case as he looks down with interest.

“Shoot.”

“Are you self-taught? Private instructor? Anybody who’s helped you out?” You ask, stammering out as you nervously play with your fingers, bending them back and forward as Eddie huffs out another laugh.

“Self-taught,” His head tilts to the left as a ghost of a smile lingers on his lips, “Why do you ask?”

You shrug, pouting a bit as you sit on your calves, now in front of him as you glance shyly at his guitar.

“I’ve been interested, and I don’t really know anybody who can play.” You explain your voice dying off in the end as Eddie just stares, his hands twitching as he squints his eyes at you.

“There’s a guitar club at school, y’know.” You wave that off, shaking your head in frustration because you’ve already gone back and forth on that very idea. It just didn’t play out well in your mind, joining this late in the year.

“Who can play well.”

Even you could now see the bright blush that overtakes his face, he moves his hand to his mouth, rubbing at his chin to keep himself from looking like a total fool as you look up hopefully at him.

“If you’re trying to flatter me, it’s working very well.” He muttered, moving his guitar so that it lay over his lap. He motions for you to move up a bit, and you oblige, standing up as he tries to make room for the two of you on the small couch.

“Yeah?” It felt like the words were sticking to the back of your throat, caught on your tongue as Eddie nodded slowly, eyes darkening as you swallowed thickly. The air was getting hotter and you felt like you could barely breathe.

“Yeah,” He muttered, his voice as dim as yours moving around in his seat feeling little beads of sweat roll down his neck.

This was really bad, he told himself over and over as a reminder, you were untouchable.

But maybe you didn’t seem to wholeheartedly agree with that ideology.

“Eddie?”

“...yeah?” He loathed how his eyes kept falling down to your lips as if he couldn’t make his feelings any more obvious. You grinned a bit, trying to contain it as you hitched your leg up onto the cushion, your knees touching as Eddie felt his heart lurch around in his chest.

“How far does that flattery go?” He could feel your little puffs of air hitting his cheek, and he just realized how close the two of you were. This wasn’t happening, there was no way he was sitting with the queen of Hawkins High.

“Far.”

It was comically quick how quickly the two of you advanced, his hands almost moving fast than the speed of light to tug you closer into his chest as if the two of you weren’t close enough. It’s much more different than what the two of you are used to. He liked going fast, to feel your teeth clashing with one another as the two of you begin to run out of air, and the feeling is something that simply encourages him.

He could taste the chapstick that lingered on your lips, artificially sweet as they always were, but he still moaned helplessly into the kiss because he just couldn’t get enough of it.

Everything about him was driving you crazy; from the way he carefully held your thigh, to his hand smoothing down your skirt from where it had gotten flipped over. He had a cologne wrapped around his neck, and the more you moved onto his lap the more the scent flooded your senses.

Your hand moved up to his chest, wrapping around his leather jacket for leverage as you slowly pulled away, not missing how his eyes fell for a second in trepidation, worried that he was being too rough and that he’d pushed you away.

But much to his relief you gave him a small smile, your other hand coming up to his neck, fiddling with the curls of hair as you leaned down just enough so that your noses brushed up against each other.

“You alright? Too much?” He murmured gently into the skin of your jaw, his lips brushing against your cheek as you shivered in his hold, weakly nodding as you tried to regain some of your dignity.

“N-no, just fine.” And you knew you were lying to yourself because it wasn’t just fine. You could swear you’ve never been kissed like that ever before. Held so close to somebody this tenderly as if he actually wanted you there.

And before he could even continue you swooped in, some of that confidence from earlier coming into play as Eddie groaned into your lips, biting and nipping at them as they traveled down his jaw to the upper side of his neck, swollen as they attached to his pulse. His hands clenched as you sucked, licking at the spot every now and then as you made your mark on him.

He was a fucking goner.

“S-shit, that’s,” His breathing was coming out choppy, and he threw his head back to give you more space, “That’s fuckin’ perfect, sweetheart.” The little pet name fell from his mouth, accidental in nature, but it still managed to give you little butterflies as you smiled a little to yourself.

Your hands mindlessly roamed his chest, ducking under his shirt as your nails grazed the skin of his stomach and you felt it clench underneath you, his uneven breaths cute as you giggled quietly.

His mouth fell open for a second as your fingers palmed at his growing length, his eyes shutting momentarily as he pawed it through the material of his jeans, acting like a total menace as you pressed your thumb deeper into it.

Eddie went to move, to tell you that you didn’t have to but you shook your head, tugging at his zippers as you glanced up at his beet-red face.

“It’s okay, Munson,” Your fingers tug at the elastic of his boxers, his eyes already giving away his true feelings even though he felt terrible for allowing you to do this, “It’s the least I could do as your number one fan.” You pull his underwear and pants down, his cock springing free as it hits your cheek. You press a quick kiss to the tip, red in color as you clench your thighs at the sheer size of him. Forgetting where you were, you go back to attending to his hard-on, your tongue running up and down his length, spreading the precum on your tongue as he gives up, his head falling back against the wall as he grips tightly at the cushion.

His hands moved on their own, gripping the back of your head as he looked at you, a silent question in his eyes as he asked you if this was okay. When you gave him a faint nod, grinning against his tip he let out another moan, guiding you to where he wanted your mouth.

Your tongue was so, so hot as it enveloped his cock, wrapping around it as you enveloped him in your mouth, bobbing your head up and down with the help of his hand as a flurry of curses followed.

“F-fuck that’s, that’s amazing sweetheart. You’re taking me so well, shit,” He groaned as you suctioned around him, his head almost hitting the back of your throat, causing tears to spring to your eyes as he cooed at your reaction, “You’re fucking amazing, yeah? S-shit, never felt this good before, god. You’re gonna make me cum if you keep d-doing that,” He’s trembling, his thighs shaking as you grip onto them for support. His hands curl around your scalp ever so gently to make sure he doesn't hurt you in the process.

His eyes glance over to the door, widening when he realized you two had forgotten to lock it, and the sheer thought that somebody could walk in on him fucking your throat sent him into a whining mess.

“Shit, it’s not even locked,” You don’t bother to care as your hands' pump and down the places your mouth couldn’t attend to, the extra stimulation causing him to see white, “But you want that, huh? Want people to see you getting wrecked? That your makeup’s getting all ruined because you’re my number one fan?” His words make you whine a bit, “S-shit, sweetheart, they’d never guess to see their golden girl on her knees, would they?” The thought of anybody just walking in on your tear-soaked face, eyeliner smudged as it trekked down your cheeks made you moan against him, the vibrations enough to push him over the edge as he spurts all over your tongue, his eye squeezing shut as a low groan escapes his lips.

“D-damn…” His chest heaved up and down, a lazy smile gracing his lips as he tugs you back up onto his chest, his fingers delicately running up and down the expanse of your arms as he pecks your lips, his thumb swiping at your cheeks to get rid of the tears, “You’re just as much of a freak as I am, huh?” It wasn’t a question so much because the way you smiled against him told him all he needed to know.

“I’m just a very devoted fan, Munson.” You reason with him and he lets out a weary chuckle, his hands roaming up and down your back, flying under your uniform as they travel up your navel. You whine slightly when his calloused fingers find your bra, tugging it down as they flicked your little nubs, smiling at him as you go limp in his hold.

“Don’t think it’s really fair that I’m basically naked while you’re all clothed up, hm?” He asks, his brows furrowing in mock annoyance, “And as much as I love your little uniform, believe me, I do, can I get this off of you? Please?” His weariness to approach just made you even more desperate, and you dimly nod as you let him slowly remove your top, his hands skimming your sides as you let out an airy giggle at the feeling.

“Sorry,” He whispers, smiling slyly against your lips as his fingers graze the same spot in a faster manner, “Didn’t know you were ticklish.” You shake your head as you let out another laugh, too focused on how he was making you feel, inside and out, to realize he had unclasped your bra in a single flick. However, what you couldn’t miss was how he tensed up a bit, his eyes dropping as his hands cupped your tits, groaning at how soft they felt against his rough skin.

“Can you sit up a bit sweetheart?” His hands moved under your thighs, tugging at the hem of your skirt as he looked at you with those damn eyes, and you nodded again, your words catching in your throat as you struggled to find something to say to him.

“Y-yeah, here…” You stammered, helping him move the flimsy material off your leg as you tossed it off somewhere to the side. His hand traveled up to cup your ass, squeezing it as you squealed, his curls tickling your bare chest as you fell deeper into his embrace, somewhat aware of how he was careful to take your panties off. You couldn’t see what he was doing but you melted when you saw him place the now-folded clothing somewhere where it wouldn’t get soiled.

“Don’t know why I waited s-so long.” You breathed out, your huff hitting his neck as he shivered, pulling away to look up at you to see your expression.

“So long for what sweetheart?” His voice was hoarse, coming up to straddle your hips as you squirmed around on his dick, the two of you groaning slightly at the feeling, almost forgetting to answer him as he rubbed against your swollen clit.

“To just talk to you, Eddie, to do this…fuck,” And the way you muttered his name, coaxing it out of your honeyed mouth made him almost go feral. Alongside the way you were grinding on him, he felt like he was slowly losing his mind.

“Don’t know either,” He kissed your neck, his wet lips trailing down to the crevice of your collarbone, his nose rubbing against your soft skin still scented with your perfume as the smell infiltrated his senses, “Seems weird coming from my number one fan, no? Where’s the devotion, sweetheart?” You roll your eyes, laughing as your head tilts back, the sound so genuine and pure that Eddie can’t help but feel his lips tug upwards to a gentle smile.

“You’re shameless Munson. Downright shameless.”

“D’you want me to stop then?” His fingers pinched your nipple, tugging on it as you wrung your eyes shut.

“N-no, don’t…just,” Your face heated up in embarrassment as he laughed again, his hand trailing down your stomach to find our mound as you sighed out in relief, the final gratitude you had been waiting for awarded as his thumb found your clit,” Y-yeah, perfect.”

Eddie laughed, dragging his thumb up and down your bundle of nerves, flicking it back and forth as your head fell into the crook of his neck, sweat lining your forehead and lips as you sucked onto his skin, not wanting him to hear your wanton moans as his finger rubbed against your slick entrance. He prodded at the skin of your inner thigh, teasing and testing the waters as he looked up for your approval. You gave him a small nod, your breath hitching as his cold rings dragged up the burning sensation of your pussy, something you longed for him to do again even though the first time was a total accident.

“You’re so wet, f-fuck,” He muttered, eyes in a trance as he watched his fingers disappear inside your pussy, groaning instantly at the way you clamped down needily on him, his fingers coming out glistening each time he went back to pump them in, “And so tight, fuck, let me know if it hurts, yeah sweetheart?” You nod limply against him, your hands cradling his neck, afraid to let go and become a total mess as he finger fucked you.

“Mhm…” You hummed, your hot lips pressing up against him, your hands playing and tugging on his curls as he huffed out a groan, “Fuck, f-faster Eddie, it feels so g-good, mm!” Your eyes snap open when he adds another finger, his thumb still on your clit as you moan loudly at the feeling.

“Shhh,” He said, clamping his free hand over his mouth as you rid his hand, his palm glistening with your essence as he kisses your forehead the act too innocent and sweet for the way he was ruining you, “Don’t want others to hear…do you?” He tilted his head, his answer rhetorical as you shook your head, not even knowing what you really wanted, “Or maybe you do…want people to hear the way you’re being absolutely fucking ruined, yeah? To see their little cheerleader soaked?”

He adds in his third finger, stretching you out, his motions never seizing and you feel like you're about to burst all on his hand when he stops. Your eyes snap open, whining as your climax dies down, and Eddie can only offer you a grin as he carefully slides you off of him, falling to the food as he lets you get comfortable on the couch as he lewdly spreads your legs open for him, his eyes darkening as he takes in your wet pussy.

“Fuck,” He moaned, whining as he glances up at you, “You’re so fucking pretty.” And it really shouldn’t make you heat up in the way that it did after everything he’s done to you, but you can’t help the warmth that quickly spreads through your chest.

He kisses your thighs, all the way up to your pulsing cunt as he smiles against your clit, giving little licks to the nub as your legs shake in his vice grip.

“F-fuck, Munson, h-holy shit…” You can barely speak as he continues, replacing his mouth with his finger as his tongue moves down to your pussy, his nose nudging at your folds as your words edge him on.

You move against his face, your wetness staining his lips and chin as you grind up and down, his tongue working at a faster pace than your hips can go as you tug his head even impossibly closer to your heat, guiding him where you wanted him most as he kneads the meat of your thigh.

His tongue is so skilled, his finger working on your clit as your climax quickly approaches and it’s not long until your back is arching on the sofa, your eyes squeezed shut as you see white, gushing all over his pretty face as your chest heaves with labored breaths.

When he pulls away you can see the sick that lines his face, glowing in the dim light of the room as you sling your arm over your face in embarrassment, groaning as he laughed, pulling himself up by the arm of the couch as he pecks your lips, his thumbs rubbing at your cheeks as he tries to coax you to let him see you.

“There you go,” He murmurs, fingers hovering over your cheekbones as he sees your fucked out and embarrassed smile, “Prettiest eyes in the goddamn world.” You turn your head to the side, swatting at his chest as he laughs along to your adorable reaction.

“You’re a lot of bark no bite,” You whisper, turning back so that you were facing him, your fingers trailing around his chin and jaw, pulling him closer as you kiss him, biting down on his swollen lip as he grunts in surprise, smiling as you run your hands along his back and up to his neck.

“Really?”

You would have argued with him that he was, that he liked seeing you flustered but did nothing about it but he never let you because he pushed himself into you in one thrust, the size of him making you choke on your words.

“F-fuck!” Your nails dig into his shoulder, and he hisses at the way you clamp down on him, “E-Eddie! S’big, f-fuck, you’re so big,” You wail, whining as his head falls into your shoulder, kissing your neck in his own form of an apology as his hands steady themselves on your hips.

“No bite, remember?” He murmurs and you would have pushed him at the audacity, but you could barely move as he slowly began to pull out of you, his tip still feeling your flutter around him as he pushes back in, your head thumping against the wall as he holds you tightly to him, moving you up and down on his dick as he pleased.

“S’tight, f-fuck, you’re m-milinkg me right now,” He groaned as he felt your heat wrap around him, the sinful smell of both sweat and sex swirling around your intertwined bodies as he got high off of it all.

His eyes rolled back into his skull in immediate pleasure as your nails left angry marks down his back, your walls fluttering beautifully around him as he continued to fuck you, rough but gentle in a way as he moved one of his hands up to the back of your head so that it didn’t hit the wall.

“Eds, please, please, hmmm…” You whined as he quickened his pace, his cock twitching inside of you as his brow lined with sweat. He watched as he disappeared back inside of you with every thrust, your slick staining his dick as he moaned at the sight.

“Shit, shit, you’re so fucking hot right now, I’m, oh my fucking god - you’re so tight…” His hands aggressively groped your breasts, and the two of you could feel how he stuttered, his hips faltering as he was getting closer and closer to his edge. And with the way you could barely let go of him, your hand trailing down your stomach to circle at your clit, you could feel your seconds release creeping up on you.

“Eddie! E-Eddie holy fuck, d-don’t stop, please! I’m going to - I’m going to c-cum oh fuck…” And you trialed off as the words slurred, your eyes rolling back, your mouth hanging open as your tongue rolled out, all of it rolling off of you as Eddie pulled out, coming all over your naked chest with a loud groan, falling onto you as the two of you tried to catch your breaths.

Your hand finds its way into his mess of curls, pulling them out of his face as you lean down, cupping his cheeks as you sloppily kiss him, overcome with a mix of euphoria and emotions as he chuckles into it.

You giggle as he pecks your lips once again, pulling back as he flicks your forehead, his eyes squeezing shut momentarily as he tries to pull his boxers up before he gets another hard-on by just staring at your tits.

“Can’t feel my dick right now.” He murmurs as he steadies himself, not missing how you snorted as he ruined the tender moment. He went to stand up before he momentarily behinds over, kissing your forehead as he smiths out your tears, kissing the corner of your eyes as he looks around the room for your clothes.

He finds your skirt and then your uniform, his nose wrinkling as he touched the scratchy material, feeling bad that this is what you’d have to wear after he just fucked you.

“Wait…” He turned around, going to the little closet in the back room, opening it up as he rummaged around old leather jackets and ripped jeans, his eyes widening in happiness as he found a comfortable enough looking shirt, (surely more comfortable than whatever that was).

He turned around to see you already tugging your panties and skirt back up, and he held up his finding, his face gleaming with pride as he waited for you to look up. When you finally did your eyes narrowed in confusion, mid-putting your bra on as your head tilted to the side as he wiggled the shirt around by the hanger.

“This looks a bit more comfier than your uniform, no?” He says, now nervous that he had taken a step too far into whatever had just happened, his smiling dropping as his hand fell, going to put it back, his mouth opening in an already forming apology before you ran over to him, taking the shirt into your hands as you grinned up innocently at him.

“You’re such a saint,” You take it from him, setting the hanger back in the closet as you tug the old band shirt over your chest, nodding as you smile contently. This was definitely better than your uniform, “Thanks, Munson.”

Eddie stammers, nodding his head as he mutters out a quiet no problem, not able to keep his eyes off of you as you try to tug your shoes back on.

“So…” Your hand's fiddle with each other, looking back to him as you give him an awkward smile, the air around you two heating up as his gaze follows the marks he sucked onto your skin, his bite marks, and everything that wasn’t covered up by the shirt and your skirt almost made him go feral again, “You still owe me a lesson.”

His brows furrow until he laughs, remembering just what started it all as he nods, tucking his hair behind his hair as he moves around something with the tip of his boot.

“Yeah, well, for my expertise, it’s gonna cost you, sweetheart. Can’t be giving away my secrets if I’m not getting rewarded for it.” You scoff, rolling your eyes as you play with the hem of your skirt, suddenly away from how soft his eyes looked in the afternoon glow and that he had the most kissable lips you’d ever seen.

“Oh yeah…?” You laugh, your cheeks tugging up as he mirrors you, the distance between the two of you becomes smaller and smaller as each of you takes a tentative step forward, still new to whatever this was, but still yearning for more.

“Yeah,” He grinned, twirling his rings around as he shrugged, “Otherwise you’d just be robbing me blind.”

You smile like an idiot, standing on your toes, your hand cradling his cheek as you pressed a gentle kiss to his lips, a reminder of what had just happened minutes ago as his hand curled to your back, not wanting to let you go even as you slowly pulled away.

“Think that would count as a downpayment?”

He pretends to think about it, his hands rubbing the back of your neck as he slowly nods. His rings clink against each other as they rub against your flaming skin, working both to cool you down but also rile you back up.

“It’s a start.”

“I’ll take it, hellfire.” And he smiles against your lips at the nickname, kissing your cheeks and forehead as he wonders who he appeased that’s working up there to give him such a miracle, to have you the most sought-out girl in your high school to be giddily laughing away in his arms as though you two had known each other for long. You kiss his nose, going to pull away when a loud knock interrupts you, both of you freezing in your spots as your necks snap over to the door.

“Hey, uh - Eddie? Is that you, man? Listen, it’s Casper. My shows in a couple of minutes and I f-forgot my headband there. I told you how it’s my good luck charm, right? A-anyways, I really don’t want to interrupt your hanky-panky time, really. But bro, please, for the love of god, don't have your dick out when I come in."

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hana-no-seiiki · 4 months

Text

☁️ . . . ⇢ ˗ˏˋ FIVE STAGES OF YANDERE ࿐: IDOL EDITION

“ 𝐘𝐎𝐔’𝐋𝐋 𝐆𝐑𝐎𝐖 𝐓𝐎 𝐀𝐂𝐂𝐄𝐏𝐓 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐒, 𝐉𝐔𝐒𝐓 𝐋𝐈𝐊𝐄 𝐈 𝐃𝐈𝐃. “

⟣┄─ ˑ 𝐈. ✧ yandere! idol! oc (jisoo han) x superfan/manager! reader

✧ tw/cw: yandere themes, reader is also yandere at the start, mentions of anxiety and self harm, honestly idol life is its own tw

HAPPY HANA NO SEIIKI ANNIVERSARY YA’LL!!

[ series masterlist ]

⟣┄─ ˑ STAGE ONE. ✧ DENIAL

“Oh gosh (oh gosh) this is so crazy. I’ve fallen in love again.

I trip so easily.

Adore new things, they sparkle.”

“Why are you so obsessed with him?”

“Dunno, just am.”

Your entire life revolved around Yesterday’s Dawn’s ace, Eve. The idol who had been in everyone’s lips. Whose name had been heard throughout nations you’ve never even heard of.

He was your sun, the reason you had the energy to wake up every single day, the light of your life.

Every waking moment you spent it either thinking of him or offering your services for name.

It was normal for you to spend hours looking at his schedule, knowing where he was, being around him most times, or staring at media of him.

Somehow, you were able to land a job as his manager.

You were finally closer to your god.

But you swiftly find out that no man should be likened to one for only disappointment can be found in such a path.

Eve was a lot more . . . burnt out than you expected. A lot less passionate and energetic than he was in camera if not irritable.

It was normal for him to harass workers when they didn’t meet a standard he imposed, as such, after the first few weeks of your employment everyone that you were with have already been fired, quit, and/or paid to keep their silence on the matter.

Yet your feelings for him only stayed; as your employment with the company. Your meticulous and proactive nature as a fan site owner allowed you to take much of the workload he threw at you.

The little admiration you have left for the man kept you standing.

And if only you were a little less stressed you’d notice his scarlet eyes providing stares of amusement, bewilderment, and growing affection.

You never complained (at least, in a place where he could hear you).

Whenever he asked for impossible items or schedules you’ll simply grin and work things out in your little way.

You adjusted to his turbulent temperament as quickly as an experienced pilot in a stormy sky, a sailor of uncharted, dangerous waters.

You were brilliant. Reminiscent of his times as a trainee.

Bit by bit he started lessening your workload. Allowing you to rest. Hell, even giving you his coffee if he didn’t want it. He never gives away his coffee.

You acquiesced to many of his whims but were never a pushover. Always doing your job perfectly. Keeping him in line.

He would have fallen for you already, had he not been in love with someone else.

⟣┄─ ˑ STAGE TWO. ✧ ANGER

“Peek-a-boo! It’s only love when my heart quivers.

All my friends yell at me, they say I have a problem.

I’m fine fine fine fine fine fine!”

“ For this comeback period, [L/N] will be assigned to Hayate instead. Eve will have his senior’s manager work with him instead.”

“Understood.”

You were assigned to another member around Spring.

Yesterday Dawn’s most hectic time of the year aside from fall as the group’s concept was as the name suggested, focused more on nostalgia and times of youth.

You were relieved.

You never thought you would have been able to say that after being separated from Eve, but now it was the only thing you had on your mind.

No more late night calls about wanting coffee but throwing the leftovers at you the moment he was sick of the taste, no more work being thrown at you and taken away at random moments, no more working around his schedule so that he’ll have time to meet that dear senior of his in private.

You were free.

Hayate was known to be the harsher one in the fandom, but much like Eve his image was a bit different from his actual self.

Sure he was demanding, but he was fair. He wasn’t controlled by whims and impulse. You were finally able to do your job properly til the end, and you didn’t always feel a judging stare from him like Jisoo would always throw at you.

You were finally able to smile.

However, you see, being a manager for another member did not mean you would completely be free of your original client.

Hayate and Eve worked quite closely, and as such, you’d often help with Jisoo’s requests even if you weren’t obligated to.

Eve immediately saw the change in you.

You were, a lot more bright. Less haggard. Your voice less hoarse. Relaxed.

You were already getting along better with his group member than you ever did with him.

Eve wasn’t really the type to show his anger actively. He was always more, passive.

The senior he was head over heels for was slowly forgotten as he’d spent countless of hours pouring his feelings into his music. What was supposed to be a bittersweet spring album turned out to be one of sour regret and frustration.

Of course, it was still a hit. It even scored him a collaboration with the senior he oh so wanted to have their eyes on him. But all he could think of as he went to bed early in the morning was the way you’d laugh whenever Hayate spoke to you.

Hmph, the guy wasn’t even funny.

⟣┄─ ˑ STAGE THREE. ✧ BARGAINING

“Hey you, do you wanna play a game? I already know what you want.

Close your eyes and count to 10. Don’t matter anyways

Cause I am going to find you.”

“Did you hear? Jisoo got his first scandal. Apparently he bullied a bunch of students during high-school.”

“Wasn’t he . . . homeschooled?”

Causing scandals was easy. Dealing with scandals was not.

All Eve had to do was talk to some people, had a few pictures edited and voila, chaos.

It was amusing really, his company superiors would ply him with reassurances and sweet words; telling him that everything will be fine and dealt with while his pr managers dropped down like flies trying to prevent the flames of hatred from spreading too far.

All of them, hopelessly unaware.

All but his stupid senior.

“Why are you doing this now, Ji?”

They always looked down at him almost. Like he was a petulant child that needed to be coddled or scolded depending on their mood.

“We should focus on the track.”

And like he expected, you were brought right back to him. As you should be.

The heads figured out that you were the only one capable of handling the shitstorm without falling into the hands of alcohol or other substances in grief.

And as they expected you did.

After all, you had a timeline of his entire life in a canva document. Even if it was only mentioned once in a concert interview before they went famous. You were an Eve superfan.

All you did was confirm the fact that Jisoo got homeschooled by contacting his parents and teachers, and the rest was easy. You even reactivated your fansite for such an occasion.

If only you hadn’t.

Maybe then Jisoo wouldn’t have a definite reason to pursue you.

⟣┄─ ˑ STAGE FOUR. ✧ DEPRESSION

“You’ll never get this concept, you might as well forget it

Just play again, bet it all, roll the dice

BLANCA”

Eve thought he was doing well in terms of romancing you.

Ever since he found out about your fansite instead of feeling disgust and horror he felt . . . great, amazing even. A high the stage could never give him.

Of course, you two were destined.

It was only his duty to protect you as your partner, to spoil you, dote on you.

Even if you don’t realize your intertwined fates yet.

. . .

Eve always hovered over you.

Usually managers took shifts with watching over the idols. Half of your time was supposed to be spent planning rather than overseeing his activities.

Yet you seemed to have a never ending babysitting responsibility.

Your past self would have committed several war crimes for the sake of this opportunity. But after a year or so under his ‘care’ you found yourself slowly veering off into the type of insanity you didn’t like falling in.

You felt a bit like Andy from the original Devil Wears Prada book, only that your resentment simmered slowly. Forming into a hideous red sludge of exasperation whenever he randomly wanted to take a vacation. Forcing only you to come with him. Which meant an even bigger workload, and even more people to talk to for flights, schedule conflicts, reservations and all that.

You snapped.

It was a calm afternoon.

The sun was burning you alive as Eve insisted you two would go on a ‘beach date’ for some summer fun.

He shoved a drink in your hand.

And you just broke down.

Tears fell from your eyes, your breath shallow.

You asked him if this amused him. If your suffering was funny to him. If making you fall over just to get his demands on time made him feel fulfilled as a person.

And before he could answer you ran.

A week after that your schedule was finally normal.

Eve kept his distance. Not just from you but from everyone.

You knew of his anxiety attacks and depression before. But seeing those up close and personal scared you.

Things only get worse from here.

⟣┄─ ˑ STAGE FIVE. ✧ ACCEPTANCE

“So it’s too late you’re in the game now. If you keep up might not lose it.

The jungle gym of fun, like hell yeah

Makin the moon fall down down down.”

Eve spent most of his ‘hiatus’ watching your posts of him. Edits, fanfictions, photography, fancams.

Of course, it wasn’t to see himself perform again. He already did that on a regular basis to make sure he kept himself up to the standards of an idol.

It was to see your captions.

Your fanatic raving made him feel . . . loved.

Your previous thoughts on his performances made him feel complete. Like he found a missing piece of a puzzle he kept trying to put something else to fill it in.

Another part of his hiatus was spent preparing for his graduation. The termination of his contract.

It was clear you didn’t love him as an idol anymore. It was his fault really. He couldn’t see how he was hurting you with his work and desires.

If there was another thing he can thank his idol work for was the amount of money he had saved.

Now, he had a new home built far away from civilization. It was completely soundproof. The bed he ordered was custom made, tailored to your preferences this time rather than his. Food stocked to the nines. A few instruments here and there so he could compose even while retired.

He can always make a new song, a new life for you two to enjoy together.

“My voice, my body, my soul. It had always been yours. I just didn’t realize it.”

✧ [AUTHOR’S NOTE]:

For more EVE content check out the #hns.eve tag 🩵

Lyrics are a mix of translations from the og song and Mitch Joseph’s cover.

OFFICIAL EVE CHARACTER AI

©️ hana.no.seiiki - yun | 2024

#yandere #yandere x reader #yandere oc #yandere x you #yandere imagine #yandere fic #yandere oc x reader #yandere core #yancore #yandere male x reader #yandere boy x readere #yandere drabble #yandere writing #yandere scenario #yandere headcannons #yandere idol #yandere singer #yandere self insert #yandere x darling

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seeingivy · 8 months

Text

the sound of the applause

actor!eren x f!reader

**part of my method acting series

content: pain pre cursor.

an: songs mentioned - london boy by taylor swift, golden hour by jvke, girlfriend by avril lavigne. anyways. this chapter tame af. we are starting our demonic era. and no, you are not getting an eren pov until I say so. and I have covid so I am feeling extra evil and already writing the next one.

previous part linked here

You’re twelve years old the first time that you feel it.

You have hippies to thank for the entire ordeal. In your small, small town in Canada, there’s very little tension or importance on the arts. Singing, dancing, acting - like many places around the world - fall short to the highs and lows that come with sports.

Your middle school is no exception. A school that can barely spare money to fund a dying arts department, that begrudgingly offers one generalized art class that covers the basics of painting. Except when the hippy dippy parents in town petition, file a complaint with the mayor, they’re sequestered to include arts in all sectors that sports are included in.

A law that opens doors insanely. And creates the opportunity that exposes you to it. The singer showcase at the football pep rally.

And if you have to, you guess you have to thank food poisoning as well. Because Paulina, the original girl who was supposed to sing, was missing from first period that morning and you were all too quick to offer to take her spot.

They give you that pitchy, old black microphone and let you sing your heart out to one of your favorite old songs, At Last by Etta James. And when you open your eyes, the recollection of the performance is wiped from your mind seconds after you finish, and there’s only one thing you remember. It rings so hard, the sound so loud in your eardrums that it’s all you feel. The rush of the blood, the eyes staring back at you, and your cheeks burning.

When you think back, long and hard, that’s the first time it happens. The first time you feel it. It sits with you, that resounding pressure, that digs on you to give in. The need, the want, the infatuation with the rush you’re feeling.

And the obsession with the sound of the applause.

“Y/N. Wake up.”

You aggressively push your forehead into the plush of your pillow, creating a nice symphony of groaning songs in response to Danny, who is interrupting your beauty sleep.

“How long has it been?” you murmur into the pillow, the stinging in your head and the fatigue sitting in your body telling you it couldn’t have even been an hour.

“An hour. But I just realized, the bridge didn’t come out right when I was mixing so you have to record it again.”

“Can you come back in like three years? When I have the energy?” you groan.

“Y/N. I’ll see you in five down there.” he definitively states, shuffling out of your room.

Against every fiber of your being, you pull yourself out of the bed and drag yourself down to the studio, making it a point to glare at him as you re-record the bridge of the song you wrote yesterday. You give it a few tries, messing with the octaves and inflections, until you get a shining thumbs up, and wrap yourself into the blanket left on the couch.

“You write anything new?”

“Shut the fuck up.”

You hold out your green book to Danny, opening it to the page marked, at which your producer is already wrinkling his nose. He hasn’t even read the lyrics yet, but you’re sure the title - Cry - is already setting him off.

“You didn’t even read it yet.” you respond, frowning.

“I don’t have to read it to know it’s brilliant. But you were there in that meeting last week and you know this isn’t what we can push out.” he responds, turning back to his soundboard, half-pulling his headphones back onto his ear.

“Danny. I-I just haven’t been able to write songs like that lately. This is what’s coming out.”

After nearly a year of writing music and touring, Danny and Sareen have leaned heavily into your Lover Girl branding. An affectionate term used by your fans, but now the entirety of the breadth that you work with. You’re widely known for the lovey dovey, sweet songs you write so when anything that falls outside of that mold, it isn’t stuff Danny and Sareen appreciate.

But you haven’t been able to write any of that lately. Which only makes that resoundling, crackling, heavy pressure in your head worse. Like you’re defective.

He turns around in his swivel chair, taking the little bound book you’re holding out for him, as he starts flipping through the pages. The worn down book you were gifted on your birthday years ago is filled with every mess of lyrics you’ve written, though none of them are meeting the game plan that was set weeks ago.

That announcement sent everyone on your team into a frenzy, which was so far from your initial reaction.

First of all, it was a rumor. That you were one leg away from being a triple threat. Second, if it’s true, you’re ecstatic. Enthralled and honored and every feeling in between. That you were even in the consideration for being a triple threat, let alone a few feet away from it.

No one else on your team saw it that way. Your producer, Danny, saw this as a sign that you need to be making more music and faster. The songs you make take you weeks to write at this point, no thanks to the perfectionism that comes with writing the lyrics and working out the sound. He’s set a goal for you - to write one song everyday. It makes it - that impending doom in your head - ten pounds heavier.

Your manager, Sareen, is no better. She only took this as a sign that you need to start being more vigilant. A hard-assed woman in her forties, Sareen is all about work ethic. That staying determined is the only way that you will get through this. And she’s extremely blunt when she tells you so.

Stars don’t take breaks. If you want it that badly, you have to work harder. There’s six thousand things working against you, take it as a note that you need to be running faster. That you aren’t trying hard enough. Those are equivalent to dumbbells for that rock on your head, that you’re sure is responsible for pinching all your nerves.

And it’s a matter of proving yourself. To Sareen, Danny, Eren, and everyone who watches you.

You appreciate the push. It’s extremely draining, but worth it when your song releases are so anticipated that you’re selling millions of copies before the song comes out. Have sold out stadium tours, and are shortlisted for awards nearly every time you do something.

You wake up. Get ready for the show. Memorize lines in between shows, film when you don’t have shows. Write songs on flights, produce through voice memos since you’re hardly in one place at a time.

And when you think about it all, finally being a triple threat, finally getting to hear Eren say that he told you so like you said that first night on set together, it’ll all be worth it. It’ll be over.

You can stop running. You can stroll, swim, make the music you like. So you oblige. This is part of the process, you just have to push through. There’s an end goal in sight. And being near Eren is a part of it.

“Have you ever thought about writing a song about…Ricky James?” Danny asks, swinging around in his chair as he smiles at you.

You wrinkle your nose as you throw the closest thing, an empty CD case, at Danny as he laughs back.

“Ew, Danny. That’s so not a thing.”

Ricky James, an infinite, insurmountable amount of talent, was your co-star on your last movie, Little Women. A British singer-songwriter, who virtually blew up over night.

He was nice - definitely the charismatic, flirty type of co-star. You’re positive half of it is the accent. After the two of you started doing press for Little Women, everyone was swooning over the two of you together. At how you guys had a handshake, did your famous kiss scene in one take, and how in almost every interview, he made it a point to joke that he was in love with you.

You get it. It works well for the press, gets people talking about the movie. But you could never like a guy like Ricky James. Or anyone who wasn’t Eren, for that matter.

“I know it’s not a thing. You’re all goo goo ga ga over loverboy. But it’s the same thing that we did for Little Women. He used the fact that people like to speculate to his advantage. It wouldn’t hurt to do the same.” Danny responds, shrugging.

“I already do use that to my advantage. It’s no secret that I earned my whole Lover Girl branding from writing love songs about Eren.”

“Yeah, but you know how it’s been for Eren lately. Maybe it’s not the best thing that your name is attached to him anymore? For both of you?” Danny states.

Eren’s had a rough go of it lately. After Satellite Port failed and the joke they made at the awards show last year, he’s all but resigned into what you call hiding. He said that he’s just busy, focusing on landing new roles and getting more credits under his belt. You know that he recently signed a deal with Scott Clarkson to film five movies with his studio, which is promising.

But you know Eren too well. He’s retreating, hiding in all senses of the word. From you too. The texts he used to send you - good luck before every show, a good morning even though you were on different sides of the world - have ceased all together. And the few seconds you do catch him, he seems worlds away.

And it’s not just you who has caught onto it. The last time you saw Historia, when she came to watch your show, she mentioned that she was concerned about him, that she thinks he’s being a little bit self destructive by working with Stone Studios. That Scott Clarkson is not a good idea.

Granted, Scott Clarkson is buddy buddy with John. You know that’s a touchy subject for her and made it a point to bring it up to Eren. To see if he was okay. But you were flying out for a tour and forgot to. And then he started showing up in the press again, hanging out with the cast he’s been working with, so you figured it was fine. That he’s going out again, smiling in photos.

“That-that’s not true. He’s on the come up - he’s going to be the lead in the Gatsby remake that Stone Studios is doing. I’m sure he’ll get an award for it.”

“There’s no need to get defensive. I’m just saying it doesn’t hurt to expand your horizons. Triple threats are awarded for being versatile, not sticking with what’s easy. Maybe you just need to push the boundary of what you think you can do.” he says, giving your forehead a tap.

“It kind of feels like cheating to write a song about someone that’s not him.” you murmur, looking down at the pages in your hand. Eren’s handwriting is scribbled onto the invisible string page. Hell was the journey but it brought me heaven.

“You know, Sareen’s not too keen about this relationship. And I know that Eren’s team isn’t either.” Danny states.

“Who are they to tell us who we can date?”

“It’s not about who you can date. It-it’s about the image. Tying your name to his doesn’t exactly always work in your favor, Y/N. There’s no loyalty in an industry like this. And for Eren’s case, you’ve never really helped him in that sense. When you stand together, with the success you’ve had, all they see is a failure in Eren, when he’s really not even that bad.”

“People’s comparisons aren’t my fault. And Eren’s doing fine, he-he’s okay.”

“Now, he is. But a few months ago, it was your name next to his that was dragging him down. If it comes down to triple threats and it’s between you and him, are you telling me that you would really pick him over you?”

Yes. One thousand times, yes. Though you know that’s not the answer Danny wants.

“You have to be more selfish, Y/N. And maybe that’s selfless for Eren's sake too. There isn’t room for the both of you, right now. I know you love him, but Sareen has a point. Is working this hard worth it if you don’t get what you want out of it? You and Eren have all the time in the world to be together, just focus on your career before him.”

You frown, staring at the wrinkles pressed up against his forehead.

“You can have what you want - have your cake and eat it too, write all these corny love songs about him after you make it. Stop running when you’re actually there, kid.”

You look down at the pages, the thoughts floating through your mind, as the lyrics start spilling out. For your first song that’s not about Eren.

London Boy.

You try to make a point to call Eren before releases. Key word, try.

But it doesn’t happen that way. Because Eren’s in Los Angeles and you’re in Tokyo and the time difference messes the two of you up so bad that when they surprise drop London Boy, you don’t get to warn Eren beforehand.

And when he texts you about it, you can feel the guilt creeping into your chest. Because you know he’s too nice to say what he actually thinks about it. If it were you, you’d wring Eren’s neck out for writing a song like this about his co-star he’s rumored to be dating. But Eren is Eren and he would never.

eren: “he likes my american smile?” babe, you’re canadian.

eren: i like the song. really.

you: i have dual citizenship.

you: eren. i’m so so sorry. i meant to tell you before but the time differences, we just kept missing each other. you know i don’t mean any of it, right?

you: it’s just a marketing thing danny and sareen planned. the song will be a hit if people are speculating who it’s about and stuff.

eren: i figured. you don’t have to explain yourself to me!!!!

eren: you’re a pop princess <3

eren: and currently number one on the billboard hot 100 for the fourth time in a row!!!

You nearly throw your phone across the room at the notifications, the frustration building so hard that it’s all pouring out of your head. You can see the stack of gifts at the front of the room - candies from Falco and Colt, as well as Marco, Historia, and Reiner - for the release.

And it’s moments like this, when you’ve been running so fast and pushing so hard, that you resort to one of your worst tendencies. Because the only thing that helps you when you feel like this is being a masochist. Feeling bad only makes you want to feel worse. Like you deserve it.

So you inflict it on yourself. By reading what people say about you online.

You reach back for your phone - ignoring the messages from Armin, Bertholdt, and Levi - as you scroll to Twitter, hiding the light of the phone under your sheets as you look through the app.

You look at the trending tab. Y/N L/N, London Boy, Ricky James, Eren Jaeger, and love is dead are trending.

You press your bolded name and swipe to the recents tab, scrolling through every tweet, each one categorizing, sticking in your mind as you scroll. A mix of the good, the bad, and the ugly.

That you’re pretty. That you’re ugly. That you have no personality, that you write mediocre songs, that you’re the best actress from Attack on Titan. That you’re lucky for bagging Ricky James and Eren, that you’re too good for Eren, that you’re horrible for writing the song.

You place the phone flat on the sheets, the absence of light making your eyes sting, as the tears string out of your eyes.

You want to make your cake and eat it too.

But is it even worth it if this is how you have to get there?

You stick your hand out, swinging it in the air with Ricky as you do your handshake, and plop onto the couch. Danny and Sareen called a meeting with Ricky’s team before you guys went to the wrap party for The Proposal, which is the only thing on your calendar that you were actually looking forward to this month.

Because Annie and Armin are the leads and because you know Levi and Hange are going to be there.

“This is Michael and Nancy. They’re my talent managers.” Ricky states, pointing out the two people across from you.

“Sareen and Danny. Sareen’s my manager and Danny’s my producer.”

“Is he behind the genius of London Boy?” Ricky asks, smirking at you.

“Shut up. London Boy isn’t about you, Ricky.”

“Oh, shut up. I know I’m your muse.”

The line sits in your stomach wrong, because all you can think about is Eren. Seventeen year old Eren, shimmering green eyes on that empty set when you wrote New Year’s Day. You shake your head as Danny turns to the two of you, a smile on his face.

“We have an idea.” Danny states, a smile on his face.

You and Ricky nod as Nancy and Sareen start laying out the plan, each consecutive word twisting horribly in your stomach.

Surely they can’t be serious.

“We think that the two of you should date, as a PR move.” Sareen states, handing over a folder to you.

There’s dates listed out, public places where they want you and Ricky to meet at, and songs they want you to release about each other. All down to the slated releases, ideas for album covers, and interviews they want you to do.

“This is part of Y/N’s triple threat campaign. I think putting in this whole ruse of a relationship and writing songs about it, especially if there’s some part of it that will be drama because of Eren and Lana, it’s even better.”

“Lana?” you ask.

“She’s Ricky’s old girlfriend. They aren’t dating anymore, which is something that we should capitalize on. For the both of you. This should get Ricky into the leagues for the Album of the Year award when he releases next year.” Nancy states, flipping through the pages.

You look over at Ricky, ready to fully shut down the idea. But when you turn your head to him, he’s flipping through the pages, writing down his own ideas in the folder.

“Ricky. You’re not actually considering this, are you?” you whisper.

“You aren’t?”

“I’m dating Eren. No, I’m not considering fake dating you for the press.”

“Eren, who was seen on a date with Myka yesterday? Right.” he states bluntly, flipping through the pages.

“That’s just tabloids, Ricky. Be serious.”

“And so is this. Myka and Eren are in a movie together. You and I are musicians. You can do the same thing as him and I bet you he wouldn’t even care. And he shouldn’t, because your career comes first.” Ricky states, leaning forward on his knees to discuss more with Danny and Sareen.

You flip through the folder again, each consecutive page filled with more and more details of how they want you and Ricky to pretend. And the last page has the words bolded, little stars around them.

Y/N gets triple threat status! Ricky gets Album of the Year!

“Y/N. Have your cake and eat it too.” Danny warns, a reminder of what you’re supposed to be prioritizing.

“This is the time to run, Y/N. You’re almost there.” Sareen affirms, the two of them nodding as they look at you.

And by the way five of them are staring at you, big eyes filled with anticipation as they wait for your response, you know you can’t say no. That insurmountable pressure - to please, to be successful, to be the best - wins out, every time.

Danny’s produced for three different hit pop stars. Sareen’s managed some of the biggest names in the industry. And you have no idea who Nancy and Michael even are, but if they’re working with Ricky, they’ve got to be in the big leagues.

You put the folder down, giving all of them a nod, as they all erupt into cheers. Ricky leans forward to give you a kiss on the cheek, which you tell him to save for the cameras, as you take the folder and walk out.

And figure out how you’re going to tell Eren.

You head to the wrap party three hours later and any excitement you had about the event is immediately drained when you know that Eren’s going to be there and you have to talk to him about it. Break up with him.

“Y/N!”

You turn around to find Armin and Annie, the two of them wrapping their arms around you as they press kisses to your cheeks. You try to stifle the literal tears that are making their way to your eyes at the sight of them, their blue eyes the same soft ones you’ve always known.

“Annie. Armin. I’m so excited for the movie, I’m sure it’s going to be great.” you say, squeezing both of their hands.

Two of your shyest friends still, they’re both blushing at the praise as Connie and Sasha walk up. You’re wrapping your arms around all of them, as everyone else - Reiner, Mikasa, and Jean - join you.

“So Y/N. London Boy, huh?” Connie asks, smirking.

“Did you guys know that Eren is from London?” Sasha says, sarcastically.

“Oh, quit it. It’s just one of those PR things. The triple threat thing made them all go crazy.” you respond.

“We respect the hustle, Y/N.” Connie states, mock saluting you with Jean.

“There is no press better than you and Eren releasing Medicine and Dress on the same day.” Mikasa states, earning a bunch of laughter from the group.

“Oh god. Don’t remind me. Whore move, from the both of you.” Reiner says, pinching your cheek. Connie mocks the ah ah ah, from Dress, which has you all laughing.

You smack his hand off as Marco slings his hand around your shoulders, squeezing hard and smiling at you so big, in earnest, that it makes your chest hurt.

“Can you believe it? You’re so close to it, Y/N - I can feel it.” Marco says, leaning forward to press a kiss onto your cheek.

You reach up to squish the plush of his cheek as Marco mimics your movements, the two of you smiling at each other. And then you feel two warm hands on your shoulder and turn around to see Eren, soft green eyes looking into yours.

And it makes you burst into tears. Soft green eyes, albeit a little tired looking, and Eren’s hair all grown out. When did Eren grow his hair out to his Season Three length? The last time you saw him, it was so short. He looks the same. He feels far away. And that pressure in your head is resounding.

“Yeesh.” Connie says at the sight of your spilling tears, earning quiet laughs from everyone.

Eren brings his hand up to your cheek, swiping the wetness away, as he glares at Connie.

“Connie.” Eren warns, the tone in his voice threatening.

“Sorry. Just missed him, that’s all.” you respond, wiping the last of the wetness off your face as they all smile at you.

“Man, every time I see one of you, you’re crying.” Hange says from behind you, the group of you turning your heads and immediately tackling them and Levi into hugs. Eren reaches for Hange first and you go for Levi, his stupid minty smell making your tears return.

You look up at Levi, who's glaring at you, and can’t help but smile.

“Levi. You could at least pretend you’re happy to see me.”

“I am happy to see you. But not when you’re crying in public. You two are going to give me an ulcer.” he states, frowning as he glares at Eren at your side.

You look over at Eren, the end of what Hange said catching up with you.

“You cried in front of them? About what, Eren?” you ask, voice soft.

“Ah. Nothing.” Eren responds, cheeks lightly pink as he runs his hand through his hair.

You both let go of Hange and Levi as Armin and Annie take to the makeshift stage, giving a little speech about their time on the film and how grateful they are for everyone in the room for supporting them. And as they do, Eren jabs his elbow into your side.

“Ow. What gives?” you whisper.

Eren places hand on his chest, feigning shock.

“Don’t tell me you forgot our secret hand signals already?” he whispers.

Jab in the side. Meaning, you need a second to talk, away from everyone.

“As if.” you respond, giving a nod to his sign.

He gives you a smile as you both turn your heads back to Annie and Armin, who are playing the trailer on the screen now. And when they finish, the resounding noise of the claps are the last thing you and Eren hear when you go out to the balcony, the cold air surrounding you both.

You wrap your hands around your arms, which Eren picks up on too fast and suddenly he’s taking his coat off and wrapping it around you. Making a point to pull your hair out of the collar, hands focused on fixing your hair around your face.

“Eren.”

“Yes?”

“I-”

The words die on your tongue. Because here he is, the perfect green eyes you fell in love with staring at you in the lamplight of the dark, and you can’t say it. You can’t shatter his heart into pieces or be the one to let him go.

When he’s one of the only things you’ve wanted.

“I know how you feel, Y/N. You don’t have to say it.” he whispers, hands tucking your hair behind your ears before letting go.

You can feel the tears spilling out of your eyes as you frown at him, the look on his face so pained that it hurts.

“I’m guessing they don’t want you to see me, at least not for right now?” Eren asks.

You nod, aggressively wiping away the wetness on your cheeks as you reach for his hands, squeezing three times. You hate that he knows. That Danny and Sareen think he isn’t good enough for you. When you’ve always been the one who was never in the same league as him.

That Eren was the one who defended you when you were there, but no one’s letting you do it for him.

“I still love you, Eren. You-you know that?”

“I know that.” he whispers, nodding. His eyes are focused on your hands, interlocked with his. He reaches in for your bicep, fingers tracing over the fish tattoo right above your elbow.

“Fishbowl, Y/N. We’ll come back to each other when it’s time. Just don’t be a stranger.” he says.

You nod, reaching forward and wrapping your arms around him as you nearly sob into his chest, his voice soothing your hiccuping, even though you’re the one who just smashed him into pieces. And when Eren wraps his hands around your cheeks, giving you one last lingering kiss, before walking away, you can’t help but sit there in the cold, his jacket wrapped around you and letting the tears bite on your skin.

You close your phone, giving Ricky a glowing smile, as you both settle into your seats at the Institute Music Awards. The two of you officially went public earlier today, though you’re both still denying any rumors that you’re dating.

“How does Ricky compare to Eren?”

You try to hide your scoff as you answer, trying your best to stay neutral in your response to avoid becoming a headline the next day.

“I’ll always have so much love for Eren. We grew up together and really came into this hand in hand and no one could ever really take that away. And there’s no bad blood between us, we’ll always be best friends.” you respond, giving them a polite smile as you walk away and swallow hard.

You can see Eren twenty feet down, in a specially designed suit that he looks wonderful in, smiling for the cameras. He’s standing in between Hyla and Myka, since their film is premiering in a few days.

“You look green, doll.”

You turn around to find Sukuna, who you fake punch in the shoulder and glare at, before pulling him in for a hug.

“You sure you’re not talking about yourself? That’s your girl down there.”

“Jesus, Y/N. Don’t ever associate me with her again.” Sukuna mutters, rolling his eyes.

“Oh? Was it not you saying she wasn’t that bad when we were kids?” you tease, poking into the soft of his cheek.

“Well, that was before I found everything out. I’d say a prayer for your boy over there, he’s about to get himself into a gnarly mess he won’t be able to get out of.” Sukuna responds, eyes focused on Eren and Hyla posing together a few feet down.

“What do you mean?” you ask, linking your arm with his as the two of you walk down, past him. You make it a point to attempt to make eye contact with Eren, but he’s too focused on Hyla that he misses you all together.

“I just mean…he’s about to get himself involved in things he shouldn’t. And you should stay far away.” Sukuna states, giving Ricky a polite smile as he joins you at your side. Sukuna gives you one last kiss on the cheek before Ricky links his arm with yours, dragging you to your seats.

You both settle into the seats, giving Marco a big smile as he sits next to you.

“Hey. Where’s Hisu? I saw her name card here earlier but it’s not here anymore.” you whisper, as the lights start dimming ahead.

Marco winces, giving you an awkward smile as he puts his hand over yours and squeezes.

“She doesn’t want to sit with Ricky. Or you.”

“Oh.”

“Just for today, Y/N. Because of the history and all that, you-you know that.”

You shake your head, ignoring the stinging, as you give Marco a half-hearted smile, nodding.

“No yeah. I get it. I’ll talk to her soon.”

“Okay.” Marco responds, giving you a smile.

You make it a point to do your best throughout the awards show, fake whispering in Ricky’s ears every time the camera is on you two, holding hands and comparing hand sizes, letting him tuck your hair behind your ear once and a while.

And it’s all going great and peachy, until Hyla gets called on stage to perform. You crane your neck back to find Sukuna, giving him a warning glance as he rolls his eyes, making the motion that he’s choking himself.

One of the most insane things about Hyla and Sukuna’s beef? The fact that they perform and write songs about each other, that are so insanely written, that they trend for weeks.

You’re sure Hyla and Sukuna are what Danny and Sareen dream about in their free time.

Hyla gets on stage, giving everyone a soft smile as a few of the girls join her on stage, adjusting their microphones. You can feel Ricky squeezing your hand hard, his jaw clenched.

“You good?”

“The lineup. Hyla, Myka, and Lana.” he responds, glaring at the three of them.

You focus your eyes on the third girl, Lana, who is Ricky’s ex-girlfriend. The only reason he wants to fake date you. Apparently, the two of them broke up after you and Ricky started trending, her insecurities about the people’s words overruling any reassurance that Ricky could give her.

“This is my new song, it’s called Girlfriend. I hope you all like it.” Hyla says, giving a smile as the upbeat music starts.

Hey, hey, you, you I don’t like your girlfriend No way, no way I think you need a new one Hey, hey, you, you I could be your girlfriend

You lean back as you observe the visuals and the line of backup dancers supporting the three of them singing, their performance extremely upbeat and punk pop star that you can’t help but tap your feet to the beat of the song.

That’s until they reach the bridge. When Hyla pulls one of the back-up dancers from the background to the front and Lana pulls Eren on stage, the two of them are seated on the makeshift chairs on the stage. Hyla’s singing around Eren, rolling her eyes at the back-up dancer.

Who's wearing the exact outfit that you wear on your tour, a sparkly, billowing pink dress. And when you take her in properly, you realize that she’s supposed to be you. The same hairstyle, eye color, skin tone. You can feel your throat dry as you watch Eren’s cheeks tinted pink on stage as Hyla sings around him, the entire audience erupting into cheers.

(Oh) In a second, you'll be wrapped around my finger 'Cause I can, 'cause I can do it better There's no other, so when's it gonna sink in? She's so stupid, what the hell were you thinkin'?

You feel Marco’s hand on yours, squeezing hard, as you focus in on the performance, trying to ignore the fact that the big, black camera is shining on your face and that everyone in the room is looking at you. And that millions of people must be talking about it at home. You turn back to give Levi a look and he shakes his head, mouthing don’t cry which you halfheartedly nod in response too.

Jean and Armin have switched seats with the two girls behind you, their hands on your shoulders, squeezing, as Eren and Hyla walk off stage, hand in hand past the back up dancer who’s supposed to be you - who's crying fake buckets of tears now.

And when it’s all done and over, you skip the afterparties and let Mikasa drive you home. She tucks you into your sheets, making it a point to help you wipe all your makeup off and leave a bottle of water by your bed, you sink into your sheets and do it again. Let that overwhelming, embarrassing, deep rooted hatred sink in.

And pull up Twitter. Read about how everyone hates you. Relive the most embarrassing thing that’s happened to you yet. Stare at pictures of Eren and Hyla and ignore the resounding sound of the applause the two of them received.

next part linked here

taglist:

@k0z3me @kayleegomez @yihona-san06 @bsenpai @sweetenertea @mykyoon @violetmatcha @rebeccawinters @cutiejg @bokutosthings @bookwrmm @mblrrr @wheredidmycrowngo @somethinginyoureyes7 @chilichopsticks @okaystopwhore @you-always-made-me-blush @itzmeme @firelordazulaaaa @whoami-72 @g-ghostly @intimacywithceline @erensmoodygf @cocomellxn @princess-ackerman @jaegerfiles @cacapeepee @squirrelspoetry @rui-0836 @moonmalice @invisible-mori @sofiasberr @bbybeeb @timetobegone @tee4str @ttokki2 @leave-rae-alone @ec3lipsy @officialsimpp @gojojang @yookayyo

pls comment on this post or any of the chapters if you want to be added to the taglist <3

297 notes · View notes

creelteeth · 2 years

Note

i. need. more. bestfriendbrother!steve.

oh. my. fucking. god ! this was so GOOD.

bestfriend’s brother!steve is my kryptonite i swear !! i’m not sure yet if i’m gna do a part two to that particular piece but here’s a lil thing!!

it’s been a few weeks since you and steve began this… entanglement.

it was almost as if steve couldn’t stay away from you now that he had a taste of you. he did a fairly good job at keeping up his poker face when his sister was around. lucky for him, she was far too wrapped up in her own little world to notice how much he’d been hanging around lately.

however she did pick up on the fact that you changed your wardrobe a bit. your skirts had gotten shorter, tops tighter, you even rolled into first period with a poorly covered hickey on your neck this week. she was convinced you’d taken her advice about jason carver, and to keep her off your trails you didn’t deny it. you’d mastered the art of answering her vaguely enough to where she’d leave it be.

today was no different from the last few, steve had started taking his lunch break at work around the same time you had free period. lucky for the both of you, there was only a small patch of woods that separated the school from the family video parking lot.

there was a giant oak tree in the middle of the wooded area, that being the place steve designated as yours. eventually, he planned to bring a knife out to carve your initials into it but he didn’t wanna seem too gung ho about this whole arrangement you had going on. even though, his excitement showed when you rolled up to the tree every single day. he was always five minutes early, leaned up against the bark with that annoyingly charming lopsided grin on his face.

“there she is.” he sighed, opening his arms up for you to walk right into them.

you practically crashed into him, unable to contain your giddiness. he had only just gotten his arms around you and you could feel yourself weaken. heat washing over your entire body.

“missed you.” you muttered into the red fabric covering his chest.

you wanted to stay like this forever, but you two didn’t have that long.

when you calculate how long it takes to walk there and back you have exactly thirty minutes to spend with him each day. it wasn’t a lot, in fact it was not nearly enough but you two made it work.

“i’m here now, pretty girl.” he assured, leaning back to look at your face, examining it like anything would’ve changed since yesterday.

the way his eyes scanned over you made you want to slink away, but the grip he had on your waist made that impossible.

steve hated the fact that he never got to take his time with you, though you never seemed to mind. in fact, most of the time you showed up already soaking wet just from thinking about him. he thought it was precious the way you were so eager, so willing to share this dirty secret with him. though, he had no idea what he was gonna do with you when it finally came to thinking you were ready to be fucked. he wanted to give you move than just a cold pile of leaves in the woods or the backseat of his car, however; he didn’t know how that was going to work.

he did his best not to dwell on those things, as did you. instead he focused on what he could have with you. he’d grown very fond of your hands and your mouth, you were always so pretty when he stuffed his cock down your throat. he made sure you knew it too.

today, he wanted to make it about you though. he began by planting a line of wet kisses down your neck, licking over the faded purple marks he left on your skin from prior meet ups. he contemplated making more but remembered how much his sister went on and on about you and jason carver’s supposed relationship. steve felt ridiculous for being upset with that, he knew they came from him, but for some reason he hated seeing someone else get the credit for it.

he settled for kissing you sweetly, lips and tongue making their way around your neck before moving up your jaw and eventually finding your mouth. he kissed you until he couldn’t breathe, your soft wet lips moved against his like velvet.

“gonna let me make you cum today, sweet thing? you did so good for me yesterday I feel like you deserve little something extra.” he chimed, both hands sliding down your back to grab your ass cheeks, kneading them loosely.

you practically melted against him, nodding weakly at his words.

“ah, we talked about this didn’t we? need you to use your words for me.” steve reminded you, his grip tightening just a bit.

there was something so embarrassing about having to say these things out loud, but steve liked to push it out of you.

“yes, steve.” you mustered the words out.

“yes, what?” he questioned.

“yes.. i want you to fuck me.” you admitted through your bashfulness.

the words you spoke made him groan, he wanted to so bad. he wanted to stretch your perfect little hole open with his cock more than anything but you were still new to this and he was dead set on making it special. his fingers and tongue would do for now.

“well, since you said it so politely..” steve joked, moving you so that it was your back against the trunk of the tree.

he watched over you intently, hands beginning to roam and grope you everywhere. planting one final kiss on your lips before lowering to his knees, the tip of his chin gliding down the front of you. he paused at your stomach, kissing the soft areas before moving down to where he wanted you most.

“you know..” he paused, lifting the perfectly ironed pleats of your skirt up for him to examine you. “i wonder what your friend would think if she knew you’d been wearing panties to match the color of my shirts.”

his words taunted you, the mention of getting caught always made you throb a little extra. you pushed your hips forward, whining in response.

it was a cute way of showing you off, secretive enough that no one would know besides the two of you. when he proposed the idea you couldn't help but get butterflies. he wanted to lay claim on you, in as many ways as possible without getting caught.

"stevie" you huff, hands finding his hair combing through the brown locks.

"don't have time, just, please. " you were a bit more desperate than normal.

your reminder that you were operating on borrowed time made him wince a bit but he shook it off. he leant forward to nuzzle his face in against your covered cunt, licking a few stripes over the red lace.

just a few licks over the cloth and he could already taste you, god— he loved the taste so much.

big warm hands grabbed at your thighs, bringing one of your legs up to hang over his shoulder.

once he finally pushed the panties aside he took a second to look over you, eyes landing on your already engorged clit. it was beautiful to him, swollen enough to poke out past the hood that held it.

"you've no idea how much I love this pussy of yours." he exhaled, fingers spreading you apart to watch your slippery folds come apart.

you were practically dripping already, needy hole desperate for more than just his tongue this time. he knew you were getting use to feeling him, so you were not granted as much warmup. Steve dove directly in, tongue sliding about your folds. making languid movements with his tongue, starting at the opening of your cunt going all the way up to your swollen clit and back down.

steve had the right idea giving you his shoulder to hold yourself up with, the minute his tongue was on you, you were spent. knees becoming wobbly at the feeling of his nose pressing against your swollen button.

you kept a hand in his hair while the other attempted to muffle your cries, though you could hear both the sickly wet slurping coming from Steve as well as the pitiful whimpering that fell from you.

"oh, oh my god- steve!" your words coming out muffled against the fabric of your sleeve.

he spent some time on your clit before moving down to your leaky hole, shoving his tongue inside. when it slid in with ease, he decided you might be ready for something bigger. warning up the opening a bit before bringing his index and middle finger up to the hole.

he spread some of your arousal around the tips of his fingers to help them in with ease. detaching his mouth from you so that he could watch and let you get use to the new feeling. the stretch of his fingers burned a bit, but the minute he curled them to hit against that sensitive spot you mewled. your hips bucking forward to push them deeper into you, the new found fullness making you quiver.

steve couldn’t help but groan at the way your pussy tightened around his fingers. he couldn’t wait to watch that tiny fuck hole get spread wide open from his cock.

“hey, look at me. how does it feel, hm? my fingers deep in this pretty pussy of yours.” he taunted you between licks, his fingers working mercilessly inside you.

his words coupled with both his mouth and fingers made you see stars. you struggled to keep your eyes open, jaw slack, the most pitiful whines spilling out of you.

your hips rocked forward, body heating up with that familiar burn.

“cumming. steve— i need to.” your words slurred together, an unintelligible sentence coming out of you.

he smiled against you, sucking harshly on your swollen clit.

your legs nearly gave out when orgasm hit. fingers tugging on steve’s hair, hips stuttering in attempt to hump against his face.

“fuck! oh my god- steve. fuck me.” you hiccuped, slippery wet walls clenching repeatedly around steve’s thick fingers.

once he was sure you were finished he pulled them out. the sudden emptiness making you wince. your fucked out hole dripping with your mess.

he stayed on his knees for a minute, looking over the glistening wet swollen mess that was your pussy. giving it a few final licks to clean up the remnants of you.

“ just so fucking pretty. “ he praised, kissing the sensitive bud before placing the thin fabric back over it.

“steve.” you sighed, voice weary.

he only nodded, looking at the watch on his wrist to see how much time you two had left. he did his best to not frown when he saw it was nearing the end. hands coming up to smooth down your outfit again before pulling you into his arms.

“you did good, pretty girl. ‘m proud of you. “ he offered, but you only hummed.

the worst part about these get togethers were the endings. you never wanted to let him go, but you also felt incredibly annoying for being so attached to him despite how fresh this all was to you.

it wasn’t just you who got bummed out by the way these seemed to be going. steve wrapped himself around you, wracking his brain over the guilt he faced for going after the one person his sister begged him not to.

“two minutes.” steve sighed, giving the warning like he always did.

that warning only prompting you to squeeze him tighter, your face nuzzled into the dip in his chest.

no one had ever made you feel like he did. even if all you got from him was messy sex in the woods.

“hey, “ he spoke, leaning back to look at you. “movie night tomorrow , right? i’m bringing home risky business.”

he wiggled his eyebrows at the seemingly fitting title. that goofy grin on his face making you smile half heartedly. you were excited to be at the harrington house again, hopeful that you’d be able to stay up long enough to sneak a few kisses once your friend hit the hay.

“do you think she’ll notice if you sit next to me on the couch? maybe even share a blanket?” you blinked up at him, wondering if he’d be on board.

“i dunno about one blanket but i’ll sit by you. might even hold your hand in the popcorn bowl.” steve winked, you knew he was joking but the idea of having such sweet intimacy with him made your stomach flutter.

those flutters quickly went away when the clock on his wrist began to beep. time was up for now.

he pulled you in for one more hug, leaving a kiss on the top of your forehead.

“i’ll see you tomorrow, kid.”

#casey writes #s.h.#steve harrington x reader #steve harrington smut #best friend’s brother!steve #hvreticz

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rubyreduji · 2 years

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Office Hours - csc

summary: you show up to professor choi’s office hours looking for help

tags: smut (minors dni!), college!au, professor!seungcheol warnings: explicit unprotected sex, reader calls him sir but in an unsexual way, age gap, cockwarming, praise, daddy kink, choking, fingering, return of seungcheol’s breeding/impregnation kink wc: 2.4k an: some people were asking me to expand on this universe and ngl i kinda love it so i caved haha. also i took one (1) biology class four years ago so i have no fucking clue how college biology works so dont hate me LOL

pt. 1 | pt. 3 | pt. 4

“Professor Choi?” You stick your head into his office after knocking on the door.

The man is sitting at his desk, his eyes closed, muttering to himself. When he hears your voice he opens his eyes and the pinched look on his face relaxes and he smiles tiredly at you.

“Ah baby girl, come in.”

You follow instructions and close the door as you do before going to sit in the faux leather chair across from him. Weariness still shadows Seungcheol’s face and you frown at this. You don’t like when he looks so exhausted, so different from his normal composed persona. “Is everything okay sir?”

“Oh don’t worry about me,” he lets out a small chuckle. “I think I’m just getting old.”

“You can’t be that old sir,” you insist. “You look too good.”

“I’m nearing forty, that is old enough for me. You’re what? Twenty-two?”

“Twenty sir.”

Seungcheol’s eyebrows shoot up at this. “Aish, I am getting old.”

“Age isn’t everything, professor,” you assure him.

“Maybe not, but enough about my old age. You’ve come into my office hours, what can I help you with?”

“I’m struggling with the out of class work you’ve assigned,” you explain. “Specific yesterday’s worksheet, the one about genetics and heredity.”

“Ah yeah. How about you come over here and we can look at it together.” Seungcheol gestures you over to his side of the desk. Daintily you pick up your worksheet and walk over to him. Once you lay the paper down in front of him you’re about to lean down to look at it but Seungcheol’s rough hands grab at your hips and pull you down onto his lap.

“O-oh!”

“That’s better, isn’t it doll?” Seungcheol says huskily in your ear.

“Y-yes daddy,” you respond.

“Good girl. Now let’s look at this homework.” Seungcheol’s arm wraps loosely around your waist, his hand resting on your thigh, while his other arm rests on his desk. He scans the page and then makes a humming noise like he remembers the assignment. His hand massages at your upper thigh as he looks over your work.

You shift a bit in his lap and you feel his dick rub against your ass. He’s already half hard and you whimper.

It’s been almost a week since you and Seungcheol have had sex, which in theory isn’t that long, but when he fucks you on an every other day basis it feels like a lot. On Monday he had a faculty meeting he had to run off to and then yesterday you promised your friends you would go out with them and they chose the time right after your biology class.

You’ve taken to texting Seungcheol though. Rarely is it ever about school work. It’s mostly pictures, whether it’s a picture of you cuddling with your favorite stuffed animal in bed or the brand new lingerie set you bought with your friends. It always keeps Seungcheol on edge when you text him but he’d never tell you to stop. It only fuels his hunger for you.

“How about this baby girl? If you can listen to me explain this and get five questions right, I’ll fuck you. Do we have a deal?”

“Yes daddy.” You nod at the man enthusiastically.

“That’s my good girl. Now listen while I explain this.”

Seungcheol starts to re-explain the whole lesson about carrying genes and mothers and fathers, but all while he does his fingers flit over your crotch and start to play with you. A singular finger trails across the inseam of your shorts before dipping under the hem and touching you over your panties.

You try to focus on what Seungcheol is telling you and you catch maybe every five words but most of your attention is on the way he’s dampening your panties with just a simple tight circular motion. You’re trying your best not to move around in Seungcheol’s lap so he doesn’t have to punish you. You like being good for him.

By the time your professor is finished talking your panties are drenched and the area between your legs is aching. A small high pitched keening noise comes from your throat when Seungcheol removes his fingers from your clit and runs them along your slit.

“So wet for daddy,” he hums. “I hope you were paying attention though because you have your five questions now.”

“Daddy~” you whine. You’re too needy to focus on the paper.

“I see. Hmm, take your shorts and panties off.” You quickly stand and do that, exposing your bare pussy to the room. As you do that, Seungcheol unzips his trousers and yanks his dick out, fisting it a bit to get it up to full mast. “Now sit on my dick and do your homework.”

“Yes daddy!” You quickly clamber onto his lap and you’re already so wet that you’re able to sink down on him with ease. You both groan at the feeling of his thick cock inside your tight walls and Seungcheol thrusts up into you a couple times before stopping.

“Lee Jimin was in here before you for office hours,” Seungcheol starts, “and just seeing him set me off.” Is that why he was so tense before you came in? “He’s a pervert, staring down your shirt and trying to look up your skirt every day in class. I wish I could just fail him.” His hands knead at your bare hips as he talks, distracting you from the worksheet in front of you.

With shaky hands you pick up your pencil and look down at the first question. You read it at least five times trying to understand. Finally you think you understand.

“B-because only the dad is affected, and i-it’s a, a y-linked inh-heritance, only those assigned m-male at b-birth can be affected,” you can barely stutter your words out, too focused on the way Seungcheol’s dick twitches inside of you.

“Good girl,” Seungcheol purs. “I knew you had it in you. Now do the next one.”

You stare at this one for even longer. After a while you feel like you’re about to cry. You still don’t understand and you just want Seungcheol to fuck you because you’re just so needy.

“I, I don’t understand daddy,” you sob.

“That’s okay baby.” Seungcheol’s large hand rubs over your stomach. “Let’s think about this a different way. I have brown eyes, which is a dominant gene, so when I put my babies inside of you, just from me alone, they will most likely have brown eyes. Would you like that doll? Babies that have my eyes?”

“Yes daddy, would like it so much.”

“So let’s look at this problem again, okay?”

You nod and start to fill out the punnett square and answer the question. Your handwriting is sloppier than normal but you don’t care because you know Seungcheol is going to give you an A anyways.

“Doing so good for me baby girl, you have three more.”

The next three questions are hell. They take far too long to figure out and that’s even with help from Cheol. At one point he just blatantly tells you the answer and has you repeat it to him just so he can claim you figured it out. The whole time he keeps referencing his genes in relation to yours and it floods your mind with thoughts of Seungcheol filling you up with his cum. It doesn’t help your focus, but you think Seungcheol knows this.

It takes you nearly thirty minutes to complete the three questions and by then your pussy is aching for Seungcheol. His hand rubs circles into your skin comfortingly, whispering praise to you everytime you answer a question. When you answer the final question Seungcheol’s hand automatically connects to your clit and he starts to rub at your nub.

“What a good girl. You were so good for me finishing your homework. I’m so proud of you, my pretty girl. I’m going to make you feel good now, okay?”

“Thank you daddy.” Pleasure spreads through your body and you lean back against Seungcheol’s body as he wraps his arm around your waist. He presses a kiss into your neck before shifting his hips under you a bit.

“Daddy is going to fuck you now, okay?” You nod and Seungcheol grips your hips tight and starts to pull you up off of him only to drop you back down. Over the time it took you to do your homework your pussy had molded to the shape of Seungcheol’s cock and he’s able to move freely in you, his tip sliding all the way to your cervix.

“Feels so good daddy~”

“God you fit around me so nice baby girl. Your pussy was made for me and nobody else. All mine.” His hands snake up your shirt and he grabs at your tits through your thin bra. You arch your back into his touch as you continue to bounce on his lap. “Heredity is interesting to think about because it can help you theorize about what your future children might look like. If they’ll have my eyes and your hair color. Or your eyes and my hair? Either way, we’re going to have such pretty children, aren’t we baby?”

“Oh yes daddy,” you whine. “Such cute babies.”

“Just like their mommy,” Seungcheol whispers into your ear, his warm breath fanning over your ear and sending goosebumps down your arm. “You like that as much as I do, don’t you, pretty girl? You wanna carry my babies just as much as I want to put them in you? Am I right?”

“So right daddy,” you tell him as you continue to split yourself onto his cock. “I want you to fill me up with your cum.”

“That’s my good girl. Letting me breed her slutty little pussy. Gonna fill your womb up with babies,” Seungcheol says. “Fuck Y/N.” All of a sudden Seungcheol is pulling you off of him. Your wobbly legs land on the floor and Seungcheol is turning you around and pushing you up onto his desk.

He spreads your thighs with his thick hands and sheaths himself back into you. At the new position he hits into you at a different angle and you have to stop yourself from actually drooling at the feeling.

As Seungcheol’s hips buck into you, you stare up at the man and take in his features. His high cheekbones and full cherry lips and prominent nose. To most people his face would look composed and neutral, but you’ve spent enough time with him to tell he’s concentrating. His eye brows are a bit furrowed and his lips are pressed together more than normal. Your eyes trace against his jawline, looking at the way the muscles are a bit clenched, and then trail up to his eyes. When you finally meet his warm eyes with yours you realize he’s been staring right back at you, his eyes narrowed as they stare down his nose at you. When he realizes that you’ve finally made eye contact with him his face shifts as he smirks.

“So pretty for me,” he murmurs.

He reaches his hand out to grip your jaw. His thumb brushes against your bottom lip before he pushes it fully into your mouth. You close your lips around the digit and suck on it as he presses down on your tongue. The feel of the rough pad in your mouth has you clenching down, your hand shooting up to grab Seungcheol’s bicep.

“Shit baby girl, it drives me crazy when you squeeze me like that.” You can tell he’s close by the tenseness in his voice. His thrusts get more pointed as he snaps into you and his grip on you gets tighter. “Fuck. Sometimes I hope that you miss a day of taking your birth control, just so I can get you pregnant. You’d look so sexy with your belly plump and your tits heavy. I’d have no choice but to dote on you and take care of the woman carrying my babies.” Seungcheol pulls his thumb out of your mouth and drags his hand down your chin so he can grab you around the neck.

“‘M so close daddy,” you whimper out. “Please breed me.”

Seungcheol’s cock digs deep into you until he’s painting your insides white with his seed. The feeling of his semen shooting inside of you tips you over the edge and you clench down on Seungcheol, your back arching off his desk and your legs scrambling around to find purchase. Seungcheol’s grip on your throat is the only thing that grounds you as you climax. When you both finally come down from your orgasms you barely get time to catch your breath because Seungcheol is pulling you to sit up so he can press his lips against yours.

Your lips move in sync with his and he holds you tight against his firm body. His hand tangles into your hair while the other presses into the small of your back. Seungcheol tastes like coffee and mints as he licks into your mouth. Your body is still a bit unstable and you tremble as he kisses you lovingly.

When he pulls away you fall into his chest, finally able to catch your breath. “My good good, so beautiful.” As gingerly as he can, Seungcheol pulls out of you. Some of his cum spills out of you as he pulls out and he reaches down to scoop it up and finger it right back into you. You squirm around as his digits breach your entrance but soon he’s pulling them back out again. He presses the tips to your lips and you wrap your mouth around them, cleaning them off.

When he pulls them away you speak. “Thank you daddy. Always makes me feel so good.”

“Of course baby. I love taking care of my pretty girl.” He leans down to kiss your collar bone before he pulls away from you. As always he hands you your clothes back and helps you get dresses before he hands you one of the water bottles he keeps in his office mini fridge just for you.

You’re curled up in Seungcheol’s lap, sipping on the water, when you look up at the time. “Oh! I have to get going daddy. I’ll see you tomorrow!” With that you press a kiss to his cheek and quickly scramble off his lap before you’re out the door.

Your worksheet is forgotten on Seungcheol’s desk but it was ruined from your guys’ escapades anyways, so it didn’t really matter. Seungcheol is just going to give you an A anyways.

As you rush off to go meet your friends you think back to Seungcheol’s words and start to plan what day to stop taking your birth control.

taglist: @pandorashbox @billboard-singer @leejihoonownsmyheart @soonhoonietrash

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heesdreamer · 1 year

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SILENCED (4)

MASTERLIST

GENRE ➩ enhypen zombie apocalypse au!

SUMMARY ➩ navigating life 1 year post end of the world was already difficult as you avoided rotting corpses with hefty appetites and groups with various bad intentions. things get harder when you run into a group of survivors, 7 boys who make it impossible to run away.

WC ➩ 6k

WARNINGS ➩ death gore blood um zombies and everything the apocalypse brings…

AUTHORS NOTE ➩ Hello, me again lol Sorry it’s been so long since the last update on this I’ve had other stuff I was prioritizing but thank you to the people following and enjoying this story! The updates are a lot smaller than my usual works and that bugs me a bit but I have a lot planned and it won’t be such a long gap between each chapter from now on lol. Reminder to check out the playlist for hints and general vibe! NOT PROOFREAD but u knew that

“What are you even talking about dude, I beat you five to one easy. It wasn’t even close.” Jake’s voice was laughing out as he rested back on the couch, swinging an arm forward in emphasis towards his friend.

“No you don’t get it, if we had a rematch I’d whoop you.” Jay was quick to respond, a gloomy look on his face from losing so terribly and the younger boys broke into a fit of giggles at his attitude.

The day had been quiet, picking up each other from school one by one and heading back to Jake’s place. His mom had been out of town for the month on a business trip and it’d become their official club house for the time being, messier than it should’ve been with blankets covering any surface that could serve as a temporary bed.

Heeseung was pushing through the front door with a strange expression on his face, glancing behind in the hallway before locking the deadbolt and peaking out of the peephole. Sweat was coating his face and the other boys stopped laughing as they looked at him.

“It’s that bad out there now?” Jungwon was asking in a soft voice and Heeseung jumped a bit before glancing at him and giving him a solid nod.

News stations had been buzzing for weeks but nobody paid too close of attention outside of the people with particularly raging anxiety. Reports of cannibalisms, first in America and then the neighboring countries.

The boys hadn’t thought much of it, some crazy new drug that would never make it this far or mass hysteria. Then it was announced that it was a disease, something that couldn’t be helped and borders could not stop and things started to get a bit more wary. Some stores were shutting down, families leaving to their summer houses out in the country and yesterday Jay had been cut from work early.

“I don’t know, I don’t think we can wait anymore.” Heeseung was muttering and Jake sat up on the couch, raising an eyebrow in bewilderment.

“You mean like leave? Where would we even go?” He was asking and his question made them all fall silent, knowing he was right and they didn’t have a safe haven to disappear to like others did. They all had families but they weren’t extremely close now that they were older, spending most of their time together and only coming home to get scolded for poor grades.

Heeseung was shaking his head and turning towards them fully to scan the room, freezing up slightly when his head count came up one short. “Where’s Riki?”

“He.. had that exam I think. Must’ve had to stay late.” Sunoo was saying it slowly to try and explain but a feeling of dread settled over everybody at the realization he was out there alone, not yet realizing how quickly things were falling apart.

“Is it really that bad Heeseung?” Jay was asking in confusion, just yesterday they all were walking around casually outside of the few religious nut jobs screaming about the end of days.

Heeseung didn’t say anything for a long time, like he couldn’t decide if he wanted to relay what he had saw or if he just wanted to let them think things were okay for a few minutes longer. He knew he had witnessed stuff that wasn’t going to be fixed anytime soon, stuff that would change how they lived from now on and he wasn’t sure he was ready to fully embrace that.

He was clearing his throat to speak but the words fell short and he made his way over to the kitchen counter instead, taking Jungwon’s moms keys and glancing at him for permission.

The younger boy looked confused but he gave him a small nod, eyes widening a touch when the oldest hesitated before going back into the kitchen and returning with the largest cooking knife available.

“Woah, you can’t go out there with that. You’ll get arrested dude.” Sunghoon was rushing out, suddenly paying attention and alert now as he sat up off the couch and raised his hands towards Heeseung.

“I don’t think there’s anybody left to arrest me.” He was spitting out but he wasn’t angry at his friends, just stricken with fear and anxiety at the thought of returning back outside but he couldn’t stand the idea of Riki being out there alone.

“Well I’ll come with you.” Jay was announcing and standing up, wiping off the chip crumbs from his sweater. Heeseung almost denied him and demanded he stayed here and kept the doors locked but he figured he might not be able to make it alone and Jay was definitely the most capable of the two of them, strong and sturdy despite his carefree personality.

“The rest of you need to stay put. I don’t care what you hear, or how long it takes for us to come back, you can’t open that door.” He was warning the group and they all paused in fearful hesitance before slowly nodding, the idea of not searching for their friends after a period of time leaving them unsettled.

The two eldest were making their way out of the apartment building, stopping at the entry door to push a vending machine in front of it. Jay looked confused when Heeseung asked him to do it but he followed suit anyways, not wanting to deny the orders considering the fear in his friends face.

Jungwon’s moms van was large and loud, rattling when you pressed too hard on the gas pedal and squealing every time it forced its large frame to a stop. They didn’t drive it often, outside of trips to the beach and going through drive thru’s, and Heeseung was grateful that the roads were uncharacteristically empty as he amateurly made his way through the city streets.

It was complete silent as they pulled up to their youngest friends school, both holding their breath as they leaned forward to see out of the driver side window and try to catch sight of any sign of life.

Heeseung’s heart was throbbing and he felt sick, almost too scared to go and find the boy in case he saw something he wasn’t able to ever forget, something he wouldn’t be able to move past. Jay’s hand was reaching forward to take his arm and he glanced at the other boy, seeing him give him a firm nod with a look of determination. Heeseung gave him a weary smile in return but it was the boost of strength he needed to open the door.

There was debris around the area from the days of mild chaos leading up to this and Jay bent down to grab a particularly long piece of metal, steadying it in front of him like a baseball bat as they got closer to the school doors.

They were unlocked and they quickly realized something was wrong judging by the papers scattered along the hallway, backpack’s abandoned in classrooms like they had to evacuate fast and Heeseung could smell something foul that caused his nose to turn up in disgust.

“Riki.” It was a yelled whisper echoing through the halls, carrying the noise all the way down the silent building until it was reaching the end and bouncing back towards them.

“Hyung? Is that you?” A scared voice was coming from the end of the hallway, shaky and muffled like he was hidden behind something and the two older boys let out a sigh of relief at the confirmation that he was at least okay enough to respond.

They were swift in their approach towards the room the voice had come from, forgetting to be cautious because of their relief and rush to get out of there but they quickly froze when a figure was coming out of one of the classrooms in the middle of the hallway.

Heeseung automatically recognized the signs of the creatures he had seen earlier, staring at the man who was staggering into the hall and turning towards them with his nose in the air. His eyes were yellow and vacant and he had dark liquid around his mouth, still moving his jaw like he was finishing a large meal. The man groaned loudly in their direction, bordering on a screech and the boys could do nothing but stare.

“What the fuck?” Jay was rushing out in an anxious tone, glancing over to his friend who was remaining still and watching it carefully. “Dude what’s wrong with him, what the fuck?”

“He’s got it.” Heeseung was stating matter of factly and Jay paled at the realization, shaking his head in disbelief and faltering backwards a few steps.

Heeseung was approaching the creature slowly and they both jumped when it reared its head and roared in agitation, sloppily approaching them and not faltering even when it almost slipped and crashed into the floor. They watched it approached speedily and when it got near they both circled around it’s back, confusing it momentarily but not long enough before it was attacking again.

The creature pinned Heeseung back against the wall, his hands flailing in front of him as he tried his hardest to shove it away with cries and groans of fear. It’s strength was double what a normal man’s would be and he was seconds from giving up when it was slumping to the ground.

Heeseung dropped off the wall and scrambled over to Jay who was panting with the piece of scrap metal in front of him, dripping thick syrupy blood now that he had smashed it into the figure.

They both watched in horror, attempting to catch their breath, as it begun to rise off the floor again. Shakily standing back to its full height and snarling again at them, seemingly angrier now.

“Oh you’ve gotta be shitting me.” Heeseung was panting out as he stared up at its cracked skull, half of its face sliding downwards and a bloodied mess from the force of Jay’s swing mixed with days of decay.

Both boys watched it as it started to approach again and then Jay was letting out a loud scream, taking a few steps forward and swinging the metal back down on its shoulder. They both froze in anticipation and then fear when the creature didn’t react to the hit at all.

“Oh what the fu-“ He was cut off as the creature swung at him and he dove out of the way with a grunt. “How do you kill this thing?”

“Why the fuck would I know?” Heeseung was screaming back in bewilderment, glancing around in confusion to try and find a way out of the situation but coming up with nothing as he turned back to keep his attention on the man who kept getting more and more unhinged the louder they avoided him and his gaping mouth.

The creature wasn’t getting winded whilst the boys were barely managing to swing their arms anymore, using this to its advantage and catching Jay off guard. Heeseung watched in horror as it pinned his friend to the hallway floor, listening to his screams of terror and gasp of air from under its heavy frame.

He didn’t think twice before he was rushing forward, and throwing the entirety of his weight into its body. He let out a guttural scream and pulled his arm back as far as it could go before driving the knife forward into its softened skull. Jay was, thankfully, getting the memo and rolling out of the way before the creature slammed onto the floor, now fully lifeless.

Both boys collapsed to the floor in fits of gasps and pants. Nobody spoke for a few minutes from shock and then Jay’s tired voice was ringing out. “Dude… you just totally saved my life.”

It was silent again for a few seconds before Heeseung was letting out a soft chuckle, launching the other into a fit of delirious laughter until they were both cracking up with the body in between them.

“Holy shit.” Both boys were pausing at the sound of Riki’s voice, a lot closer now as he pushed his way out of the classroom and was watching them from the end of the hallway. “You guys totally killed Mr. Kim.”

“And then what?” Your voice was completely enthralled as you spoke, leaning forward towards the campfire so your elbows were on your knees and you thought you saw Jake’s lips curl up from the corner of your eye.

“Well… we went back to get the others. We tried to get to family but..” Jay was trailing off but you nodded in understanding and he gave you a grateful look before sighing and continuing with his story. “Heeseung found a map in the pocket of a dead guy on the highway out of the city and he had circled the general area that you found us in, so we assumed it was safe.”

“And it was.” Jake was adding and it was some of his first words of the night, having remained mostly silent and to himself throughout your trip.

It had been two days since you left and you knew everybody was feeling unsettled by the fact you were heading back home now to the unknown. It was a mostly uneventful journey, not stopping much or sleeping more than a few hours with a shared determination to get there and back as soon as humanly possible.

You felt like the universe had cut you a break when you arrived to the veterinary hospital Jungwon had seen on the map, only encountering a handful of walkers and finding some medicine that should do the trick fairly quickly. But you knew the universe wasn’t kind nor was she fond of handing out breaks so your stomach clenched with the idea of what could be waiting for you back at the camp.

Sunghoon could’ve died from blood loss and infection and passed along the traumatizing act of putting him down before he turned, or he could’ve turned in the night and taken out a few of his brothers before anybody was awake enough to put a stop to it.

You knew the two boys with you were thinking similar things so you’d ask for a story to try and keep their minds off of it, listening to Jay carefully as he recounted the first time they’d killed a walker and how happy Riki was that it was his mean teacher that often stuck him in detention.

“Heeseung was our leader before he was ever our leader.” Jay was remarking as he finished his story, scooting down more into the dirt so his back was fully pressed against the rotted log he was resting on.

Jake hummed in agreement and you didn’t say anything, thinking about the statement and the conversation you’d had with the eldest boy about the weight of his responsibilities. You felt a longing for him suddenly, missing him and the others more than you thought you would and you could tell the two with you were thinking the same thing now that it was falling silent again.

You didn’t say anything as you were standing up to stomp out the fire, knowing it was already a risk to strike it up in the first place but especially to sleep with it roaring.

The three of you followed the same routine as the past two nights, stringing up cans in a circle around where you were sleeping so if anything, dead or alive, bumped into it you’d have some form of warning before it was coming down directly on top of you. You laid your head down in the pile of leaves and tried to ignore the sticks sitting uncomfortably under your shoulder blades, falling asleep to the sounds of the forest and the two boys breathing.

——

You’d been walking for a few hours before seeing anything familiar but your body was alert to the fact you were getting closer to the camp again, this time with a backpack full of supplies and a prayer in the back of your mind that things would be okay.

It didn’t take long for you to realize something was off about your surroundings, the woods unusually silent and resting like all the animals and trees were holding their breath. You raised your hand and folded it, a silent signal for the boys to stop walking and fall into a crouched position behind you.

Your eyes were hurriedly scanning over the forest floor and your heart sank when you noticed multiple pairs of tracks and footprints that wouldn’t have been from your group, having no reason to venture this far out. You waved Jake and Jay closer and they quickly shifted forward in their crouched position.

“Is it a hoard?” Jake was whispering to you when you pointed out the shoe prints in the mud, glancing at you with a worried expression. Jay’s eyes were dark with concern and his face was hard, glancing in the direction of the others and frowning.

“I don’t think so.” You were shaking your head and sighing softly as you trailed your finger around the indented mud to explain to them. “The steps are too direct and pointed, if it was walkers they’d be messy and all over the place.”

“So it’s people then.” Jay was saying matter of factly and you all feel into a heavy silence, knowing you had no choice but to continue on the path back home, regardless if there was anybody left waiting for you or not.

You didn’t bother wasting anytime, falling into fast and silent footsteps and you maneuvered your way through the woods, guns drawn and knives out of your holster in case any of the people were still around and surveilling the surrounding woods.

Jay caught sight of something long before you did and you were grateful for his hand that shot out to stop you from rushing right into the view of the man you could now see, pacing back and forth in the center of the little houses and keeping an eye out for anything out of place.

You lip curled up in a sneer but you weren’t exactly sure what to do. If it was up to you, you’d simply take him out from a distance but you didn’t know how many were inside with the boys and if any more were not here, not wanting to risk the safety of the others or the three of you by acting on impulse. Jake seemed to be thinking something similar considering he was tapping your shoulder to get your attention, indicating down to your knives after you looked at him.

You understood what he was implying but you stared at him for a few seconds to make sure he was certain, realizing you hadn’t yet discussed the groups morals when it came to the living.

His eyes were hard as he gave you a solid nod and he mouthed for Jay to have your back as you moved in silent towards the patrol. The man didn’t have time to react before you were behind him, listening to the sound of Jay whistle and bring his attention forward before you were wrapping your hand around his forehead and tilting his head back so his neck was fully exposed to you.

He let out a gurgled shout as you slid your knife across his throat, grunting softly under his weight as you tried to lower him to the ground as silently as possible.

You looked up at Jay after he was on the ground, watching him carefully as he gave you a small nod of acceptance and you sighed softly before returning it to him and waiting for Jake to come out of the woods and meet you. The three of you ducked against one of the houses, your backs pressed against the wood as you listened to try and get a guess of how many people were inside.

“I say we just kill him already.” It was a woman’s voice and she was speaking in a nasty rasp like she was a heavy smoker, your heart pounding at the sentence she spoke. “He’s half dead already, I’ll be pissed if he turns on us and takes a chunk out of my arm.”

You glanced at Jake after she was done speaking and he was already looking at you, both of you relieved to hear that she was talking about Sunghoon still being alive, immediately followed by the dread of what she was implying they should do.

“Touch him and you’ll have bigger problems than him turning.” Heeseung’s voice was speaking now and it was dropped to an octave you’d never heard it in before, cold and serious and he threatened her in a deadly tone.

You heard an annoyed scoff from a male voice before it was followed by the sound of low groans of pain that you made out to be Sunghoon’s, wincing slightly at the hurt in his cries.

“Do something then.” The males voice was speaking in a teasing manner and you heard Sunghoon groan again, likely being hit or kicked by somebody inside to prove a point towards the other boys helplessness. “Oh.. you can’t, that’s right. I forgot.”

There was more sounds after that but you couldn’t fully tell what they were, feeling sick and helpless where you were sitting until Jay was snapping his fingers and getting both of your attention back on him.

He was making signals with his hand and you swiftly understood that he was implying he wanted to rush inside and take them out before they had a chance to react or take any hostages, using the element of surprise to your advantage. Jake seemed more hesitant in the idea although you figured it was only the two of them inside the small house, seeing the car they had arrived it and doubting it could fit more than four people.

Your eyes wandered over to the body on the ground and you steadied your footing in the dirt before nodding softly to Jay and patting Jake on the back.

It went extremely fast, your mind on complete autopilot and devoid of any extreme emotion to help you get through the terrible act without hesitating or missing your shot. Jake was kicking the door open roughly and then stepping back to allow you and Jay to rush forward, relief rushing through you at the confirmation it was only two people and then followed by horror considering how easily you were able to sink your knife into the skull of the woman.

She’d barely had a second to process your arrival, eyes widening in fear and letting out a painful gasp of shock before her face was lifeless and she was crumbling to the floor.

You felt slightly sick that it had been so easy for you to kill two people in the span of minutes but you glanced up at the scared boys huddled around the house and you realized that you didn’t regret it, that you’d do it 100 times again if it was necessary.

Heeseung was tied to the radiator next to Sunghoon, clarifying the reason he hadn’t even able to stop their assault on the boy and you glanced at him to see him far paler and more lifeless than he had been when you’d seen him. He was still alive however and you were rushing to grab the supplies from your bag when you noticed the horror on the boys faces, eyes over your shoulder.

You froze up but before you could turn to see what they were seeing, a shot was ringing out close to your ear and you were completely disoriented for a few seconds.

It took awhile to process what had happened, turning your body in a panic to see a fourth man laying in the doorway of the house. His knife was still rattling against the floor from where he’d dropped it and you saw the exit wound coming out from the backside of his head. You spun back around and your heart crumbled when you saw who it was that had killed the man, saving your life by taking another’s.

Riki was holding the gun in shaky hands, barely able to keep it steady and his eyes were wide in shock and horror, keeping it pointed in your direction despite the threat being gone now.

“Riki.” You were saying softly, still frozen but raising your hands in surrender and taking a small step towards him. You didn’t necessarily think he would hurt you but he clearly wasn’t thinking straight and his fingers were still dangerously tight around the trigger. “Riki, it’s okay. You got him, he’s dead.”

His eyes shot to yours at the words and his face softened slightly, letting you approach and take the gun from his rigid hands.

He was dropping his shoulders in relief once the metal was out of his hands, shocking you by pulling you in for a tight hug that knocked the air out of your lungs. You returned it after a few seconds, wrapping your arms around his shoulders and squeezing him tightly with your eyes shut. You could hear the others moving around, untying Heeseung and greeting the others.

After Riki let you go and went to sit down in the corner and calm down, you quickly administered the medication into Sunghoon’s veins and sighed softly at the heavy breath he took at the feeling of it entering his system. You pushed his damp hair off his sweaty forehead and smiled softly at him even though he couldn’t see it, happy he had managed to fight for this long.

You were standing up again and immediately bumping into another frame, pausing until you realized it was Heeseung.

His hands were coming up to cup your face and you smiled at him in relief despite the cuts on his face and the noticeable black eye that you imagined had come from the struggle with the looters that had led to him being the only one tied up. “You gave them hell didn’t you.”

He laughed softly at your words and nodded his head, eyes gentle as he looked down at you and you felt your heart clench uncomfortably at both his expression and how much you had missed him.

You thought this about them all as the night continued on, telling them how your run had gone and listening to them laugh and tell funny stories that you didn’t fully understand but you still felt a lightness in your heart just from how excited they sounded about remembering the smallest details of things that had happened to them together in the old world.

Riki was still a but subdued after what had happened, not speaking much and staying in the corner as you all ate dinner and took sips from the liquor bottle the three of you had found on the trip. He seemed a bit out of it and your heart felt heavy after Jungwon had leaned in to whisper and explain to you that he had never killed somebody before.

You felt guilty that he had done something like that to save you, your own mistake for not assuming there was another person still outside or checking the tracks more carefully because you were too worried about them and too focus on getting inside as soon as possible. Your care was making you stupid and making you weak, leaving the youngest to lose a piece of himself to fix your mistake.

It was this that made up your mind for you, solidifying that you couldn’t stay here with them any longer or else things like this would keep happening. You’d have to continue to risk yourself for them and vice versa, you couldn’t take watching them hurt themselves in the name of saving you or each other and you knew now that they were always going to put the others and you over themselves individually.

You kept reminding yourself this as you silently packed your bag, waiting for the others to fall asleep and leave you on watch duty before you were preparing to slip out.

You’d stay in the woods outside the camp for the night and make sure nothing hurt them during your watch cycle and then you were going to disappear into the dark cover of the trees once the next person on the rotation woke up and found you missing. You left them all of the medication and food, taking nothing but your change of clothes and your knives.

The crickets were extra loud as you made your way outside, having carefully stepped over the sleeping boys and left a note with detailed instructions on which medications to give to Sunghoon and when. You included a small goodbye sentence just so they knew you hadn’t been taken and didn’t get hurt trying to find you, although you had a feeling they’d try anyways.

You were barely off the porch, your foot hitting the dirt softly and feeling the cold chill of the night when a voice behind you was causing you to jump and spin around.

“So that’s it then?” You whipped around with wide eyes but your face crumbled when you realized who it was, seeing Heeseung come out of the shadows with a hurt expression and hooded eyes. “You’re not even going to say goodbye?”

You froze as you looked at him, words falling short as your mouth open and closed in silence. He scoffed as he looked at you, turning his head away as his eyes teared up slightly but he shook his head in anger before taking a few steps in your direction with a raised accusatory finger.

“You’re just going to leave after all this?” He was spitting out at you and the tone of his voice, the disgust lacing his words, made your heart drop into your stomach with a crushing weight.

“I have to.” You replied back with desperation, your face curling up in anguish and you tried to get him to understand even slightly what your reasoning was. “Sunghoon almost died Heeseung, and Riki he… these things will keep happening.”

“He didn’t die.” He was almost yelling now and you flinched back at the volume of his voice, having half a mind to shush him softly and watching the way his face curled up in anger at the sound slipping through your lips. “He didn’t die Y/N, and you were the one who made sure of that. You care about us, I know you do.”

You didn’t know how to reply to that, not wanting to correct him especially when he wasn’t wrong.

You did care about them and it was making your skin crawl every time you found yourself smiling affectionately at one of their offhanded jokes or paying extra attention to their wounds and bruises. Even more so with the boy in front of you with the gentle way he touched you to make sure you weren’t injured, when his face was lit up by campfires or his determination to lead a group of boys through a world he himself didn’t understand.

“I can’t watch it happen.” Your voice was breaking and your shoulders sagged in upset, exhaustion wracking through you both emotionally and physically. “And it always happens, Hee.”

“It won’t happen this time.” He was taking more steps towards you and his hands were shakily coming up to hold your face, staring down at you with his own sense of determination to try and help you see his side of things. “Why didn’t you say bye to me?”

He was asking but you knew he already knew your answer and you tried to pull out of his touch to avoid answering, stopping when his thumb was gently rubbing your cheek and shaking his head to try and stop you.

“Because you wouldn’t be able to leave.” He was answering for you, filling in the blank and giving you a soft sad smile that made you break into a sob, your first time allowing yourself to cry for as long as you could remember. “Right? Tell me I’m right.”

You didn’t say anything but you didn’t need to, feeling him pull you in tightly against his chest as you fully let yourself feel the wave of your emotions, restricting them for so long in the name of survival and fighting to make it through the day.

Heeseung was keeping you in his embrace even when your legs were giving out and you were sinking to the floor in his arms, your hands hitting the dirt and feeling it mold between your fingers. You hooked your head over his shoulder and shut your eyes tight when your gaze fell on the body of the man you’d killed so easily earlier.

You let him hold you like that until your sobs were slowing down and the blood was drying in the grass.

You stayed like that far longer than you’d realized, sitting still and frozen until your cries slowed down and his blood had fully dried in the grass.

536 notes · View notes

loubouskz · 2 years

Text

who's going first

(3racha x afab!reader)

part 2 for: your moans would sound nice

description: y/n comes back to the studio to hear the song the boys have been working on...and to fuck as well.

warnings: smut, foursome, unprotected sex, slight switch!reader(only to jisung), dom!changbin, dom!chan, dirty talk, praising, petnames(baby(girl), sweetheart, sweetie, etc.) prepping, reader back talks chan- so slight brat!reader, jisung being impatient, oral(fem and male receiving), deepthroat, multiple orgasms, overstimulation, creampies, some aftercare

wc: 3,000+(somewhat proof-read)

a/n: long time no see! how is everything going? you doing well, eating, sleeping, drinking some water? for me...I've been okay. the last few months I stopped writing because a lot of devastating things happened and I wasn't in the right mindset for a while. but now I'm slowly coming back. as you saw above this is part 2 to my 3racha fic(FINALLY)! I'm so happy that I've finally finished it. and I couldn't have done it without the help of a friend who stayed on the phone with me, yesterday and today. I had about 1,000 words already written, but with my friend. I wrote 1,000 yesterday and 1,000 more today. I'm so happy that this is finally finished. but enough talking. I hope you enjoy this part 2.

also fill free to comment or inbox me about this fic or upcoming ones, I love read the things you guys have to say!

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I knocked on chan's studio door, waiting for one of the boys to answer. jisung had texted- with a whole bunch of emojis that the end might I add, saying they wanted me to hear the finished product of one of their new songs, and to bring some drinks. it had been a few weeks since everything happened, I felt my body become warm just thinking about it. the door opened to a smiley changbin in a pink hoodie and joggers.

"good evening y/n." changbin said, opening the door wide enough to let me enter. I saw jisung and chan sitting on the couch, looking very comfy man-spreading on the tiny couch. "hey guys." I said, sitting the drinks I brought with me on the desk. "hi, y/n-nie, did you get my favorite?" jisung asked, standing up to grab his cup. "of course I did." I said, grabbing his and putting it in his hand. he immediately took a sip, "hmmm, every time it feels like I'm drinking it for the first time again." he said, throwing his head back then taking his seat back on the couch. I laughed as I handed chan and changbin their drinks as well. that's when I looked at what they were wearing. chan wearing his iconic black muscle tee and shorts. jisung wearing a black hoodie over and jeans with rips in the knees.

"you boys look nice today." I said, sitting in between jisung and chan. "thank you, y/n." changbin said with a wide smile as he took a sit on the chair in front of the desk, spinning around. "you don't look too bad yourself." chan said, with blushed ears. "you mean the one of the five whole outfits that I own, that look good together that I've worn multiple times." I said with a laugh, making the boys laugh too. "yes." chan said. "okay enough small talk!" jisung said, grabbing the attention. "I want y/n to hear the song." he continued, while slightly bouncing in his seat and bumping into my shoulder. "jisung, she just got here. we haven't asked her about her day." changbin said, kicking jisung in the foot. jisung whined and looked at me. I laughed and told them about my day.

"so you didn't do much? okay! SONG TIME!" jisung yelled. chan laughed and changbin rolled his eyes. "damn, yes I want to hear the song now. impatient brat." I said towards jisung, who just stuck his tongue at me and I stuck mine right back at him. changbin turned around and clicked around on the laptop, till an alluring melody and slow bass filled the room. I leaned back and closed my eyes, letting the music enter my body.

a r&b intro started with changbin singing including chan in the back, then fell into the first verse with jisung rapping. I felt the boys' eyes on me, watching my reaction. soon the chorus began, the same as the intro, just more full and enticing. my head bobbing the music. next was the second verse, changbin fast rapping the first part then chan slow rapping the next. the mixes of the two different rap styles, feeling more and more captivating. then was the bridge of the song, jisung was singing then chan was next. that's when I was caught off guard with familiar sounds in the background, right in the middle of the two voices. I stopped moving, my eyes snapping wide open as I felt my cheeks heat up. jisung started smirking at a giggly chan and changbin. soon the song ended with chan vocals and the same slow r&b beginning.

“wow” I said, not really having any words. “what’d you think of it y/n?” chan asked. I looked at him and smiled. “It sounded amazing like always channie.” I said. chan laughed and looked down. “what about the bridge?” jisung asked. I whipped my head to jisung. “it sounded sexy, you pervert.” I said. “you’re just as much.” jisung said. “did you invite me here to listen to the song or just to fuck me again?” I asked, looking at all three boys. “both.” changbin said, leaning forward, resting his arms on his legs, I laughed. “alright then.” I said, “who’s going first this time?” I continued with a smirk.

“jisung.” changbin said, nodding his head to him.

very quickly, clothes met the floor while kissing jisung as I got on top of him. I ran my fingers through the back his hair, pulling on it a little. his hands exploring my body, giving squeezes here and there. I moved my hips to feel some more of his hard on that was growing under me. he groaned into my mouth as our tongues fought over dominance. I made my way from his lips to his neck, leaving a wet trail in the process. I sucked right where his neck and collarbone meet, making him moan loud.

“fuck, that feels nice baby.” he said, pressing my body more into his. my hands traveled down his chest and brushed over his nipples, down his abs till they made it to his cock. I quickly got off jisung and sat on my knees in front of him. keeping eye contact with him as I did a bold long lick up his length. jisung’s head fell back as he groaned, keeping eye contact though.

“don’t tease him too much, y/n.” changbin said. I looked back at him and smile at him. “of course not. I want to feel him inside me this time.” I said as I jerked jisung off with a firm grip. I turned back around, kissing the tip of the head. slowly pushing him inside my mouth, not stopping till I made it almost completely down to his pelvis. jisung’s hips bucked up out of pleasure. he ran his fingers through my hair and started to guide me how he wanted.

“you’re doing so good. getting it all nice and wet.” jisung said, making me whine on him. “want me to prep her for your cock jisung?” I over heard changbin ask. “yeah.” jisung groaned out. changbin left his chair and shuffled close to me, kneeling down at the level I was at.

I felt changbin’s hands grab my waist and trail down my legs, making me spread my legs naturally. changbin’s hand cupped my sex, groaning at the feeling of how wet I was. “baby is already so wet.” he said as he pushed one finger into me. I moaned around jisung’s cock, bucking my hips into changbin’s hand. “focus on jisung, baby. I’ll do the work here.” changbin said, rubbing my ass. I closed my eyes as jisung guided this hand to my hair, pulling on it a little.

“you’re doing so good baby.” jisung said through his moans. I hallowed my cheeks harder around him at the praise. I felt changbin add a second finger, scissoring inside me making me pop off jisung and jerked him with my hand. “god, do I make this hard every time you see or think of me?” I asked jisung, making him groan and changbin stop his movements below.

“oh she’s feeling bold this time.” i heard chan say in the background. I turned my head to him, “yeah, and what can you do about it? nothing as of right now, it’s jisung’s time.” I said, looking back to jisung. “right baby?” I said, with fake innocent eyes and a firm grip on his cock. “yeah, fuck off chan.” jisung said. “watch it.” chan said, I giggled and was about to take jisung back in my mouth.

“come on y/n.” jisung said, grabbing my hand to help stand me up. changbin removed his fingers and sat back down in his seat. “let’s get a move on baby.” he said, making me sit onto his lap. with my legs on either side on his, he grabbed a hold of his cock and slowly pushed down inside me. feeling his length fill me up nicely, so firm and hard in me,

“feels so fucking nice. god damn.” jisung said, grabbing my hips. I moaned as my pelvic bone met his. rolling my hips in a circle to get used to his size. “you feel good too sungie.” I said, looping my arms around his neck before kissing him on the lips. jisung squeezed my hips as I slowly brought my hips up and going back down. breaking the kiss as I was working up the pace with each bounce. “fuck you’re so tight y/n. shit, i’m not gonna last long.” jisung said. “that’s fine sungie, you be good and cum whenever you need too.” I said out of breath, making jisung throw his head back once again. “just keep bouncing like that and i’ll cum in no time.” he said back with his eyes closed. I closed my eyes too, focusing on the feeling of his cock inside me.

“angle your hips a little more y/n.” I heard chan say next to us. “be quiet channie, it’s jisung’s time.” I whined out, but I did what he said anyway and gave out the biggest whine.

with the new angle, jisung’s cock hit my g-spot perfectly every time I came down. “oh fuck.” I said, pushing my head into jisung’s sweaty neck. i pressed my lips on his ear and whispered in it. “you’re doing so good baby. I love how you feel inside me. I can’t wait for you to feel me up.” I said, before leaning back and holding his head up- making him open and lock eyes with me. “you can do that for me right sungie?” i asked as I bounced harder, feeling my first climax coming fast. “I’m about to cum.” jisung said, as he started pushing his hips up to meet mine. “please cum for me jisung.” I said as I felt myself tighten around him. with one final thrust from him, he came inside me, triggering mine at the same time. both of us moaning and whining at the feeling. jisung held on to me tight, not letting go. taking some time to calm down as I messed with the back of his hair as we waited

after some minutes, jisung slowly pulled me off him, making me hiss. i sat down in the middle of the couch, between him and chan. “wow, that was amazing. i loved everything second of that.” jisung said in his hyper self again, like he didn’t just get down fucking me. making the other boys laugh.

“still need a few minutes y/n or we start my turn.”changbin asked, with a smirk. “i just need a sip of my drink and I’ll good.” I said. changbin handed over my drink that was on the table, “you better be for me.” he said as I grabbed the drink from him. I felt my cheeks heat up at his comment.

I took a few sips from my drink before standing up and walking over to the table to place my drink down. I turned to changbin and smiled at him, “hey there.” he said. “hi.” I said as i sat in his lap. he tilted his head up and place his lips onto to mine. soon the simple kiss turned into a heated makeout session. changbin pushed his tongue into my mouth, making me groan. his soft lips left my lips to my jaw, down my neck. leaving sloppy wet heavy kisses all over, sucking hard in areas that made me whine. I pressed down into his crotch, trying create friction.

“no sweetie, stay still for me.” changbin said, holding on to my waist. I quickly stopped moving and waited for changbin to do or saying something. “take my clothes off me baby.” he said as his hands slid down to my body, onto my thighs. i slid my hands under his hoodie and felt up his body. he leaned his head back, till holding eye contact with me. I pushed his hoodie up, slowly working up his body. he lifted his arms up as the hoodle came off. I leaned down and kissed down his chest. I got onto the floor and pulled at his joggers, making him lift his hips. his underwear came off along with his joggers. I looked at him as my hands slid between his thighs as I pressed them apart. I kissed his thighs as I made my way to his hard on.

“just get it wet enough for me to slide right in.” changbin said as I kissed my way on his cock. I took my tongue and licked up and down a few times before taking him slowly into my mouth. bobbing up and down each time coming up, circling my tongue around his tip. changbin bucked his hips up, making me gag on him. "will you let me fuck your throat?" changbin asked, I nodded my head with my mouth on him. he carefully stood up and grabbed the back of my head. bringing his hips back before thrusting into my mouth, quickly picking up the pace. I closed my eyes and focused on not gagging. I felt my spit coming out of my mouth down his cock, falling to the floor and my thighs and hands.

“she takes cock in her mouth so well, doesn’t she changbin?” jisung asked in the background. “yes she does, fuck.” changbin answered. “you’re gonna have feel her mouth.” he said to chan. “i’ll have to next time, when I’m not fucking last. I won’t last if I feel that pretty little mouth of hers.” chan said, I whined hearing his low voice enter my ears. changbin removed his cock of my mouth and sat back down in the chair behind him. he patted his lap, making me standing up. “turn around baby. face the boys, I want them to see your pretty face as you ride me.” changbin said. I turned around and went to sit on his lap. he grabbed my waist with one hand and I felt him pushed his cock into me as I sat on him. my head fell forward, hair falling into my face and moaning at the same time. I placed my hands on his knees and looked back up at jisung and chan.

jisung was still naked, slowly playing with his dick in hand. chan had his tank top off now and pants just down enough for the cock to be out. chan spat in his hand and jerked his cock off, watching me carefully. “come on baby.” I heard changbin say, pushing his hips up, making me gasp. I lifted myself once and back down. “oh god.” i said as I picked up the pace. not too fast, but enough to feel the knot building up inside. “you look so good.” I heard jisung said. feeling their eyes on me, hearing the wetness that was being made from me and changbin. I tightened up around him. “shit, you’re already about to cum?” changbin said, but I didn’t respond. “huh baby?” he said, grabbing my waist. “yes binnie.” I whined out. “open your eyes y/n-ie.” I hear chan say. my eyes snapped open and looked at both the boys with watery eyes and a wide mouth. I was starting to lose my pace, changbin quickly noticed and started helping me- guiding up and down.

“cum all over me y/n.” changbin said in the low voice, his hips thrusting up as mine pace down. mind went out as I came all of him with my thighs shaking. “oh fuck.” changbin said as he kept going to reach his high. “cum in her bin, just like jisung did. make her even more messy for me.” I heard chan say. I let out a high pitched moan as changbin filled me up with his cum. changbin groaning with a tight grip on my waist. “shit.” changbin said, rubbing his hands up and down my body. “your tits looked amazing as you were riding him y/n.” jisung commented, I busted out laughing. “thank you sungie.” I said. I looked over to chan who was already looking at me with smirk. I slowly lifted myself off of changbin and slowly made my way to chan. he hugged me as I sat on him. I brought my lips to his and gave him a heated kiss. before it could go farther.

“I gotta use the bathroom guys.” jisung said as he quickly stood up. we watched as he put back on his clothes in a mess and left the room. chan chuckled and looked at me. “you’ll be brave with jisung and a good girl for changbin. how are you going to act for me?” he asked with his head tilted to the side. “I don’t know. how do you want me to act?” I answered back, tilting my head with his. chan smiled before he flipped me into my back on the now open space on the coach, I yelped at the fast movement. he climbed over my body, hands on other side of my head, “how about you lay there and take my cock like a good girl I know you can be.” chan said before pecking my lips and heading to my neck. kissing down to my chest, taking my right nipple into his mouth. “ah channie.” I said as my hands ran through his hair and stayed. he kissed down my navel til he was right above my clit.

his eyes locked with mine as he brought his hand up my slit, gathering the mixture of cum that was spilling out. popping his fingers into his mouth, groaning at the taste. his fingers slid out and quickly into me as his mouth came in contact with my clit. I cried out at the overstimulation, pumping his fingers in and out at a slow pace as his tongue played with my clit. “chan.” I moaned out. I arched my back and rolled my hips into his face. his left hand gripped my thigh tightly. the sounds in the room would make even the devil turn a blind eye. “fuck, I wanna cum channie.” I said, as I gripped got tighter on his head. he moaned with his mouth on my clit, curling his fingers into onto my g-spot. I tightened around his fingers and my high hit my like wave. he took his mouth off me, “good girl.” chan said, taking his fingers out before hitting up.

he grabbed my legs and lifted them up, slipping right between my legs. he brought one leg down as it fell off the side of the couch and held the other up to his shoulder. chan grabbed his cock, stroking it once. “think you can held my cock today babygirl?” he asked. I nodded my head as I grabbed his hips and rolled mine into his. “please.” I begged. chan rubbed his cock over my slit before pushing in, moaning at the feeling.

“so tight still, after being used twice before me. but also messy for me.” chan said as he pulled out and pushed back in. I closed my eyes, loving the feeling of how full i was. “feels so good channie.” I said, digging my fingertips into his skin. he hissed at the feeling and snapped his hips quickly into me, making cry out. “take it baby, I know you can.” chan huffed out, hanging on to my thigh, picking up a fast pace. my head fell to the side to see changbin watching the show. I moaned and tightened around chan. “so good.” chan said, placing one hand next to my head again. I turned my back to him and slid my arms up to his back.

chan placed his forehead on mine as we kept eye contact. “I’m about to cum channie.” I said, dragging my nails down his back. “oh shit, hold it a little longer for me.” he said closing his eyes, giving me harder and faster thrusts. I nearly screamed, chan quickly brought his left hand to my neck, giving it a light squeeze. my eyes rolled to the back of my head as my orgasm washed over me. chan gave some more hard thrusts before cumming hard, deep inside me.

chan laid his body on mind with head in the creek of my neck. after a few seconds of silence, the door opened up. we snapped our heads to the door to see jisung poking his head in. “just saying I heard you scream.” he said as he walked in, closing the door behind him. I blushed and hid into chan’s chest as the boys chuckled. chan sat up and slid his cock out of me, making my whence. “changbin, hand me some tissues please.” chan said, holing out his hand. changbin grabbed them and placed them in his hand. chan cleaned me up and help me sit up. jisung helped me put on his hoodie he wearing that he had over his shirt, kissing my forehead once my head popped through the hole. I stood up and put my underwear and pants back on as chan and changbin put their clothes back on. we all sat down in our original spots, I laid my head on jisung’s lap and brought my legs up on chan’s lap. “take a nap y/n for a few minutes.” jisung said, running his fingers through my hair. “you sure?” I asked, looing up at him. “yeah, we have to review a few songs before we leave for the day.” chan said, rubbing my legs, massaging them a little. “okay.” I said, closing my eyes and almost falling asleep immediately.

“y/n-ie.” I heard as someone was rubbing my arm. I hummed out and turned my head. “we’re done here. we can leave now.” the voice said. I opened my eyes and saw changbin. I smiled and sat up and stretched my arms and back. we stood up grabbing our things we had laying around.

“let’s head to the dorm and watch a movie with some take out, I'll pay for it.” chan said, smiled sweetly as he picked up the left over clothes on the floor to bring with us. “that’s sounds good to me.” I said, looking at jisung and changbin. they nodded their head, “hell yeah!” jisung said, opening the door. changbin threw his arm around my shoulders as we followed jisung out the building.

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mostly-marvel-musings · 2 months

Text

Typical Stark - Epilogue

A/N: Now we can say goodbye to this series. This was such a treat to write. I’ll miss this series! Leave a comment, like and reblog if you enjoyed it!

Pairing: Tony Stark x Fem! Reader

Warnings: Death by domestic fluff.

Word count: Just a bit over 1k.

Typical Stark Masterlist

“Tony, not like that!”

“You know, one of these days you’re gonna have to start trusting your husband, Y/N.” Tony sighed, watching you hunch over to redo all of his work in your garden.

“Oh yeah? Say that to my peonies you killed last week.” you huffed, brushing hair out your way before staring pointedly at him, quieting any further arguments.

It was a sunny day at the lakehouse. Your house that Tony surprised you with right after you came back from your honeymoon.

It was away from the city, still close enough to commute to the Avengers compound. Surrounded by nature and all the calm and quiet you didn’t know you needed. A throwaway detail you never realized your husband picked up on. You’d mentioned to him once how it had been a dream of yours to have a house by a lake, a big garden where you could grow your favorite flowers and vegetables.

The man never ceased to surprise you.

“Mama!”

You heard your five year old cry before her tiny but urgent footsteps caught up to you two, her brown hair billowing in the breeze as held up a glass for you.

“We made you lemonade.” she explained with a proud grin, making you smile adoringly.

“Did you now? Thank you, my love.” You’d been wanting a drink to cool down anyway, stomach grumbling a little with hunger as you stood up. The sudden movement made your head spin a little as you stumbled, reaching out to hold Tony’s arm.

“Whoa. You okay, hon?” he rubbed your back, eyes full of worry.

“Yeah. Just a head rush. I’m fine.”

You took a big gulp of the drink, feeling better already before picking up your daughter and settling her on your hip, giving her a big kiss. You settled her on your lap as you sat on a wooden bench in your garden.

“Is it good, mama?” her big brown eyes that she’d inherited from her father bore into yours as she waited for an answer, giving you her biggest grins when you told her you loved it.

“Where’s my drink, little miss?” Tony asked as he gave Morgan a little tickle, causing her to squirm and giggle in your arms.

“You made the pretty pink flowers wither and die, Dada. No lemonade for you.”

You had to stifle a laugh watching Tony pull a face at his daughter. It was a delight watching the two of them interact. In more ways than one, Morgan had taken after Tony, but more often than not, you saw glimpses of yourself in her too.

“Wither and die? Why are you growing up so fast?” Tony shook his head at the both of you in faux exasperation.

Hearing Peter call her inside, she wiggled out of your grasp and ran back inside, leaving the two of you alone. Sighing, you put your feet up on the bench, leaning back and closing your eyes, letting out a groan as Tony gave you a quick foot massage. Baby Stark number two was still a long way but you were already exhausted.

“Ugh, my feet are killing me today.”

Back in the house, you could see Peter Parker and Morgan scuttling around in the kitchen, your daughter waving at you both from the window, making you chuckle.

“Seems only yesterday we brought that tiny little bundle home huh?”

You hummed in agreement, both of you recalling the day your daughter was born. It had been the longest fourteen hours of your life.

“I swear to God I am never having sex with you, Tony Stark.” you glared at the man who was quite frankly terrified of you in the moment, watching you pace about the hospital room, wildly uncomfortable and irritated with everything.

“Let’s not make promises we can’t keep, honey.” he did his best to calm you, rubbing your back gently as you stood gripping the back of a chair. Your contractions had been coming along steadily, each one worse than the last. The doctors had informed you hadn’t dilated the required amount yet, so there was still time for the baby to come.

This one was bad though, you felt like your stomach was being wound tight with hot iron bands, the pain came in waves, draining you of your energy. The nurse placed her hand on your belly, letting you know it was time before carrying you out to the delivery room in a wheelchair; while a panicked but excited Tony followed you right out.

“You’re doing so great, sweetheart. Keep pushing.” Tony winced in pain at your grip on his hand, kissing your sweaty, matted hair while you screamed in agony.

“I hate you, Anthony Edward Stark! You better run for your life when this baby comes out.” you gritted your teeth, tears rolling down your cheeks as you panted, resting back just for a moment before it was time to push again.

The doctors and him shared a sympathetic look, he was sure they’d heard it all and probably worse.

“I love you too, Y/N. Come on, time to meet our little girl now, yeah? Push.�� he wiped your sweat away, encouraging you every step of the way, chuckling at the angry threats you threw at him.

One final push and she was out, you fell back against the chair in exhaustion, eyes closed before you felt a soft and warm tiny body placed on your chest, who was wailing angrily.

She had a mop of dark brown hair, red face contorted, tiny hands balled up in fists. The most beautiful baby girl. Your baby girl.

Wrapping her up in a little bundle, the nurses handed her to Tony, who looked down at her part in awe and part in disbelief, his eyes brimming with tears looking at his child opening her eyes that perfectly matched his for the first time.

A moment he’d never forget.

“Welcome to the world, baby Y/L/N Stark.” he whispered, bringing her over to you as more tears streamed down your face.

“We made her, Tony.” it felt like you could gaze at her forever, every little wiggle, every face twitch of hers left you awed.

“We did. I think it’s safe to say she’ll be getting her looks from her father.”

Typical Stark.

#tony stark x reader #tony stark fanfiction #tony stark imagine #tony stark fluff #tony stark x y/n #tony stark x you #tony stark fic #typical stark #tony stark #marvel fanfiction #the stark squad #mostly marvel musings

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flowercrowngods · 1 year

Note

*checks time* a prompt for you. eddie's insomnia versus steve the human weighted blanket. 🥺

in which Eddie hasn’t slept in days and feels like he’s losing his mind. fairy lights, music, and Steve lying down on top of him with promises whispered into his skin are what saves him | cw: gets pretty heavy on the insomnia | 2.8k

Eddie doesn’t sleep. Hasn’t slept in a while. He knows it must have been two days. Maybe three. And before that it’s always just been one lucky hour, maybe two, his body collapsing into blissful darkness before black turns red and he’s back in the Upside down, before silence turns into Chrissy screaming at him, for him, because of him.

Eddie doesn’t sleep. And it’s starting to show. His movements are slow, thinking and speaking takes way longer than it used to, than it should, and everything is dulled. Sometimes he hears voices where there are none, sometimes he misses words directed at him before one of the shrimps call for his attention again, annoyed and only a little worried. Only a little, because Eddie is quirky, Eddie is dramatic, Eddie is like that, right? Right?

Wrong. Eddie is just tired. His hands won’t stop shaking, his mouth won’t stop talking, his thoughts won’t stop running. It doesn’t even feel like he’s in control of himself anymore, and it’s beginning to be real scary.

But even when he thinks, screw the nightmares, I just want some sleep, rest won’t find him. The constant thrum of anxiety keeps it all away and he’s starting to get frustrated, angry, desperate.

He just wants to sleep. Please. The laundry already starts talking to him, and he doesn’t remember hanging it up, and almost panics when it’s gone.

This is fine. It’s all fine. His joints ache, his scars itch, sometimes smiling hurts, but it’s all fine. He just needs sleep.

It all comes to a head when he’s hosting Hellfire for the kids two weeks since his last full night of sleep — and a full night is being generous, because his standards have gone so low as to that meaning he got five hours of almost uninterrupted sleep. Magically, the kids don’t really suspect anything, don’t even notice the bags under Eddie’s eyes or find their own completely misguided whiz kid explanations for it without so much as asking how he’s been doing. Part of him is glad, because they shouldn’t know, shouldn’t worry, shouldn’t see.

It also helps that even complete and utter sleep deprivation can’t ruin Eddie’s Dungeon Master headspace — and so what if the traitorous elf that asked the kids for help sounds a bit like the angry cabinet door he left open all day yesterday because he always forgot to close it? That’s between Eddie and his mind that he’s absolutely been losing.

Everything goes by without a hitch, the kids busy discussing each other’s moves and yelling and hollering, than watching Eddie massage his temples one, two, three times.

It’s fine. Everything is fine. Except his skin has started tingling three hours ago and he knows he shouldn’t drive the kids home, knows he shouldn’t even be hosting them in this state, but he can’t… He can’t let the Upside Down win.

They didn’t get him with red lightning and murderous bats, and now they won’t get him with nightmares or the lack of sleep.

Maybe he’s been cursed. What if he’s cursed? Fuck, what if he’s actually been cursed to die the slow, agonising death that Dustin gave Mike’s character in the one shot he hosted last week, his brain rotting inside his skull and the cure just out of reach, so close but so far? Is that possible? Is that a thing? It sure feels like it, and—

“Eddie?”

Wait.

Steve? Why’s Steve asking for him, calling his name, where is he?

Eddie blinks. And blinks again. Only to find himself in the living room, a shaking hand pressing the telephone to his ear.

He’s been calling Steve. He does not remember. Panic is building inside him and he swallows it down.

I’m not going crazy. I’m not going crazy. I just need to sleep.

“Eds? You there?”

“Yeah, man,” he says, his voice too shaky, not at all sounding like him, and he wonders if someone’s taking over his body. If Vecna is back. If he’s been possessed. Fuck, he might really he possessed, and he shouldn’t be calling Steve, he should keep them all safe, he should—

“What’s up?” Steve asks then, and Eddie sort of never wants him to stop talking, because his head is quiet when he does. Keep talking, Stevie. Please tell me I’m not going crazy. Tell me I’m not cursed. “You okay? Are the kids still there?”

After a moment Eddie finds his breath and his voice, hoping it sounds more like him now. “Yeah, actually, I was wondering if you could come pick them up around nine-ish? I’m not…” okay, he wants to say, but doesn’t. “I can’t really drive. Today.”

There’s a bit of rustling on the other end of the line and Eddie listens, because listening to Steve, to his voice and his movements, is easier than listening to all the things inside his house that suddenly have a voice now.

“Sure,” Steve says. “Yeah, I can come pick them up, no problem. You okay, though? Do you need anything? I can come over sooner if you want, grab them and end Hellfire early. Just say the word, okay?”

Despite himself, Eddie scoffs. “End Hellfire early? Peasant. Heathen! Heretic!”

And Steve just laughs that soft little laugh of his and Eddie listens like his life depends on it.

“Alright, Munson, you little shit, I’ll be there at nine. I’ll just do two rounds, grab you, Dustin and Will on the second one, yeah?”

“Sure, whatever,” Eddie says. Then Steve’s words process and he asks, “Wait, me?”

“Yes, you. I’m not leaving you alone when you sound like… Like you could really use a hug but don’t wanna ask for it, alright? Trust me, I know all about how that sounds. And you don’t gotta be alone, okay? We can just hang out here, don’t even have to talk, just listen to some music or whatever.”

And Eddie doesn’t know what to say. It’s not the sleep deprivation this time, though, it’s Steve Harrington and the way he always seems to know when something’s up. Maybe Eddie’s voice really didn’t sound like him just now, or maybe Steve is just really fucking perceptive and sweet like that.

“The things you listen to are hardly music, Stevie.” That’s all he says. All he can say without breaking into tears, because hanging out with Steve outside of these walls that mock him, laugh at him, talk with him, sounds exactly like what he needs right now.

Well, what he needs is sleep, but Steve feels like second best. And isn’t that something he never expected to feel.

“Shut up, Munson,” Steve laughs, and it’s soft, soft, soft. “But that’s not a no. So I guess I’ll see you then.”

Just as promised, Steve is there at exactly 9:00pm. Not one minute early, not one second late. Eddie scoffs and shakes his head as he jogs to the front door.

And maybe it’s the sleep deprivation, but Steve looks really fucking pretty with that smug half smile and another stupid polo shirt under his grey jacket. Eddie swallows. It’s probably the sleep deprivation. It definitely is. Because suddenly he wants nothing more than for Steve to come and hug him.

Sleep, hug, hang out. That’s his list now. It’s growing.

He obsesses over that while Steve brings Lucas, Erica and Mike home. Dustin and Will are talking strategies and Eddie busies himself cleaning up, sorting his notes and carefully storing his Hellfire stuff in the little cabinet unter his desk.

When he’s done, because maybe this took longer than it should have after he forgot what he was about to do a grand total of three times, Steve’s just pulling up to come get them for the second round.

Eddie grabs a bag with a change of clothes, a notebook because he doesn’t expect to find any sleep anyway and he wants to keep himself busy with something, even though writing takes precious brain power he’s going to be lacking for basic things such as making himself breakfast or remembering to get into the house when he’s standing by the front door.

Not like that has happened before. More than once, that is.

With his bag packed, he goes to grab Will and Dustin and together they head out to where Steve’s waiting outside his car, just leaning against it like he’s the goddamn protagonist of some shitty movie. Maybe he’s seen too many of those. Maybe Steve should stop working at Family Video, the movies are a bad influence apparently.

The car ride is blessedly silent, the only noise being the quiet music coming from the radio, and Eddie closes his eyes as he lets street lights wash over him. In the back, Will and Dustin do the same. Everyone’s tired after Hellfire, Eddie knows. Sometimes he catches Steve smiling when he comments on how he hates driving the kids home after their sessions because they always manage to fall asleep on the short ride home and he gets to be the asshole that wakes them up.

Eyes closed, the vision of Steve’s fond smile and faux exasperation in his mind’s eye, Eddie smiles. It’s only when the constant, pleasant rumble of the engine stops and the world is cast in absolute silence, that he opens his eyes. Steve’s watching him, but instead of that smile Eddie’s been dreaming of, there’s a worried expression waiting for him.

“You look like shit,” Steve says so, so quietly, and Eddie sags into the seat, twisting around to face Steve completely as he loses every ounce of fight left in him.

“Can’t sleep,” he says, rasps, whispers.

Steve just looks at him. He’s always looking, always seeing. “Nightmares?”

Eddie shakes his head, plays with one of the loose threads where his jeans are ripped at the knees. “Not even nightmares, just… Insomnia, Nancy called it. I love how she has a fancy word for everything.”

“Shit, man. I’m sorry.” Steve sounds like he means it, and Eddie wants to wrap himself up in that. “Is there anything I can do for you?”

“Tell me I’m not going crazy?” The words leave his mouth before he can hold them back and Eddie hates how small he sounds, how scared, how tired.

But Steve, oh, Steve, he’s not small or scared or tired. He’s none of that. He’s not weak like Eddie, because after looking for five, six, seven seconds, Steve turns to open his door and gets out of the car. Eddie’s heart sinks and he rubs at his eyes — his dry, aching, burning eyes, protesting at never getting to close anymore.

Then the front passenger door opens and Steve is there, kneeling beside him, taking Eddie’s hands from his eyes and holding them in his own.

“You’re not going crazy, Eddie. I promise you, you’re not going crazy.”

Eddie doesn’t look at Steve, can’t possibly meet the eyes that belong to this incredibly sincere and kind voice. He keeps his eyes on the dashboard instead, watching as the unmoving shadow of a tree morphs into different shapes right before his eyes, his mind playing tricks on him without hiding it anymore.

“Sure feels like it, though,” he whispers. Or he thinks he does. He’s not so sure anymore, watching the one shadow become two, then three. He closes his eyes, clenches them shut like it would make all his problems disappear.

Maybe it does, because like this, there’s only Steve’s voice as he’s talking so gently, so quietly, so unlike anything and everything Eddie has ever known.

The words don’t really register, but one moment Eddie is sitting in the car, the next he’s standing, and it’s warm and it smells like Steve and— oh. They’re hugging. Steve is hugging him. Holding him. Talking still like he knows Eddie needs it, like he knows the world will fade and shift and morph if he doesn’t, like he wants nothing more than to talk Eddie down from this brink of madness.

Then there’s a hand in his and the air is cold again, but it’s fine because there’s a hand and its guiding, holding, soothing.

A door falls closed, a lock clicks, and the hand is still there.

They’re in Steve’s house. Then in Steve’s room. And then there’s music. The hand is gone, and Eddie blinks, his eyes aching, so dry and tired and angry him.

Steve gently, so very gently pushes him to sit down on his bed, but Eddie doesn’t have the strength to sit, so he falls backward until he’s lying on Steve’s bed. It’s soft, comfortable. There’s a string of lights on the wall behind his headboard casting the room in warm light, and Eddie wonders if it’s Christmas soon.

It’s not. It’s August.

It doesn’t make sense.

But they’re pretty.

Eddie is only staring for a while while Steve is off doing something or other, and then he’s back in Eddie’s line of sight.

“Can I try something?”

Eddie just stares.

“It’s absolutely cool if you don’t want to, man, but I do this with Robbie sometimes when she can’t sleep. It doesnt work on me this way around, I always have to be on top, I hate having something on my chest, but—“

“Stevie, I have very limited brain capacity right now.”

“Right, sorry,” he laughs sheepishly and then rests one knee on the mattress. That’s when it hits Eddie that he’s lying in Steve Haddington’s bed, and that aforementioned Steve Harrington has nothing better to do about it than to fucking smile at him.

“Tell me if it’s bad. Seriously, tell me. Uncomfortable, bad, panic-inducing or just plain wrong, yeah? Tell me.”

And Eddie doesn’t understand what on Earth he’s supposed to tell Steve, when…

Steve’s lying down on top of him. They’re touching from knee to shoulder, Steve’s head landing on his collarbone. He’s warm. He’s heavy, and for a second Eddie can’t breathe and it’s too much, his lungs can’t fill, he can’t—

“Breathe, Eddie.”

And he does. And it’s the easiest breath he took all day. He takes another. And another. And all of them smell of Steve, all of them are warm, all of them a promise that he’s not losing his mind or his sanity. His heart, possibly, but that’s a problem for a different day.

“Better?” Steve asks, his breath leaving goosebumps on Eddie’s skin.

He nods. His hands coming up to wrap around Steve because part of him is still scared that this is a dream, a hallucination, or that Steve will decide it’s enough, he can leave Eddie to his business of losing his mind again.

But Steve’s not going anywhere. He shifts, getting comfortable on top of Eddie and promises into the skin of his throat, “I’m not going anywhere, Eddie. I’ve got you and you’re safe. Close your eyes for me, I’ve got you. I’m not going anywhere.”

And, miraculously, Eddie believes him. The weight of Steve on top of him, his promise now eternalised in Eddie’s skin, and the quiet tunes coming from the record player take him where he hasn’t been in far too long.

He doesn’t even have the time to think about the way his past self would scoff at him for letting Steve Harrington lie down on him like this. For holding him close.

There’s only Steve who keeps him safe from the brink of insanity and guides him to a much gentler, warmer, kinder place. It’s a bit like insanity, actually, but at least here there’s someone to take his hand and hold it.

The last thought that crosses his mind is the list he made earlier. Sleep, hug, hang out.

He falls asleep with a smile on his face.

This quickly turns into the only way Eddie can fall asleep, and he’s embarrassed about it at first. Feels like a burden and doesn’t ask for it, spends most nights alone and with the resolution that he just won’t sleep. But Steve finds out and makes him come over again or just kidnaps him in broad daylight.

Every night they spend like this, Steve promises the same thing. “I’m not going anywhere, Eddie. I’ve got you and you’re safe. Close your eyes for me, I’ve got you. I’m not going anywhere.”

Every night they spend like this, Eddie believes him as he winds his arms around Steve in turn and holds him.

And then, over time, words whispered into skin turn into the tentative press of lips there. They turn into kisses, into more promises, declarations, pleas.

Some nights turn into most nights, into every night, and Eddie doesn’t lose his sleep again, not like that. Sometimes it’s Steve who wakes up from a nightmare but Eddie is there to soothe him, to make promises of his own and to hold him until he’s asleep again.

They make it work. And somewhere along the way, somewhere between sleep and promises, underneath the fairy lights Steve never takes down, they fall in love.

It’s a different kind of insanity, and one that Eddie never wants to run from.

#steddie fic #steddie #stranger things #steve harrington #eddie munson #steve x eddie #the irony of me writing this because i can’t sleep and posting this at 3am is not lost to me #okay actually im posting this way past 3am because sleep deprived ol me forgot what he was doing lmao #THE IRONY #dio words #sorry for taking this wonderful opportunity for mild hurt and big comfort and just. writing insomniac eddie whump #i am a whumper at heart what’s a dio supposed to do #eddie munson whump #steddie hurt/comfort

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