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causenessus · 3 months

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Love Languages. | Bungou Stray Dogs

inc: dazai, chuuya, akutagawa, tecchou, jouno

written in 2nd pov (female reader implied)

song recc: do you love by trish toledo & baby bash

word count: 2324 words

pretty sure everything is written in lowercase except for names if they didn't look ugly capitalized bc aesthetics !!! had tons of fun writing this I apologize, this is barely proofread and for literally every character I got too caught up in specific examples and scenarios and just kept building off of it but I think they're kind of sweet so I hope u enjoy <3

dazai osamu - acts of service

“she peels an orange for us in the morning / she woke me up to give me half” golden girl - frank ocean

he’s terrible at taking care of himself, so someone who takes the time to care for him just makes every wall crumble

he’s probably horrible at remembering to eat as well, so if you make something for him he’ll treasure it forever

bonus points if your job requires you to wake up earlier than him (which isn’t hard, he def comes in a little later than his coworkers) and you leave something for him to eat when he wakes up or to take with him to work (or both <3)

he’ll start to look forward to waking up in the mornings in hope that you’ve made him something

never asks you if you’ll make something in specific or if you’ll even make him something at all. he adores anything you make and doesn’t want to make you feel obliged to do something if you happen to be tired and don’t want to cook tomorrow

voices all his appreciation for you when you both have laid down to go to sleep

“bella, I can’t tell you how much it means to me, all that you do. you really don’t have to make me anything if it’s a hassle in the morning or when you get home. you already work so hard.”

you turned onto your other side to face him, pushing a stray lock of hair behind his ear as you smiled, “I do it because I want to, ‘Samu. and because I love you. if I can’t spend the day with you because we’re both at work, at least I can take care of you.”

his chest buzzed with so much happiness his eyes stung for a moment. he held himself back from saying that he didn’t deserve you. saying something like that wouldn’t solve anything. instead, he’d make himself worthy of you by helping out as well

he probably can’t cook very well but he finds other ways to help, washing the dishes, doing the laundry, getting groceries, and cleaning the place so that there’s less on your plate

ask him to do anything and he’ll get it done for you as soon as possible <3

I think that for him, receiving such sweet love without any words is foreign to him but is just what he needs. he’d rather show how much he loves you than say it (although he loves to tell you it as well). getting out of bed could be so difficult for him some days, yet having a goal for himself has motivated him to become a better person. he wakes up, excited for what you may have made him and ready to do whatever he can for you

nakahara chuuya - gift giving

“they asked, ‘do you love her to death?’ I said, ‘speak of her over my grave and watch how she brings me back to life.’” - mahmoud darwish

it’s easier for him to express how much you mean to him by giving you everything you want and everything he thinks you would like

he still tells you that he loves you every chance he gets, but oftentimes it is accompanied by a gift, no matter how small it may be, from just a single rose to a whole garden

for him, it gives a new purpose in his work; he’s working in order to get you whatever your pretty heart desires

he’s proud to use his hard-earned money to buy you things (rather than spending it all on wine <3 ily chuuya)

the easiest thing he can always get you is a favorite snack or drink and he’s got a whole system for it

he knows every store it’s available at and many of the clerks are familiar with him from the sheer amount of times he’s visited them to buy something for you. it never grows old for him, his favorite thing to do is buy you something on his way home from work or during the day when he’s planning to surprise you with a visit

he keeps a mental list of what your favorite things are. you’ll tell him about something you like without thinking anything of it but he’s already planned out when and how to give the item to you. it’s always on his mind what he’ll buy you each day, and it’s always worth it seeing you enjoy whatever he’s bought you

sometimes it’s as simple as a coffee and he’ll drop by your work to give it to you in person

“hanging in there, Angel? need a little pick-me-up?” he has the biggest smile on his face every time he sees you, and bringing a gift for you with him only adds to his excitement

“you spoil me, Chuuya,” you wrap your arms around his neck, leaning further into him as he holds you in his arms.

“what kind of boyfriend would I be if I didn’t?” he responds, rubbing your back as you sigh.

receiving gifts from you is just as sweet. no one has ever given him as many gifts as he’s given others–which is fine with him–it’s not about what he’ll get in return and he knows that not everyone expresses their love the way he does

but he’s touched whenever you get him something. since giving gifts is so meaningful to him, it means even more that someone would go through the trouble to give something back to him

he’ll keep whatever you get him close to him at all times and smile every time he sees it or remembers it

once, you bought him a new chain for his hat and he hasn’t changed it since. it only made the hat more special to him now that it reflects two people that had changed his life

akutagawa ryunosuke - words of affirmation

“my love, you are worth it all.”

we all know how the boy responded to dazai’s praise or even simply just the words “dazai wants to talk to you”

to hear a person who has persisted through his stubborn, aggressive defense say they still love him causes him to start to soften for you

he’s been surrounded by harsh words and people who have exploited him and brushed him to the side whenever he wasn’t needed all his life, so it stirs his heart to hear someone notice things about him and who tells him that they want to stay with him

it’s something reserved for solitary moments just between the two of you for sure, but that makes the time all the more special because he can let down his guard and just be with you

his past has made it hard for him to believe he is worthy of anything other than the murderous skills he’s harnessed in order to get him to where he is in the Mafia, but you’ve shown him that there’s more to him than just how well he can use Rashomon

he never bothers to try and listen to what other people are saying but he always gives his full attention to anything you have to say

he doesn’t even like to hear compliments from anyone else, he doesn’t trust them at all but he trusts and believes anything you tell him, knowing you have the purest intentions of loving and supporting him

after a job, all he wants to do is go home. by the end of the day, he’s sick of everyone around him so on the rare occasion that you decide to visit him, he won’t even notice until you call out to him

he had just finished a job, it was successful, but it had gotten messy. Mori had already told him off and he didn’t want to hear anything from anyone else. he stormed past every piece of vermin that had decided to get in his way, their whispers just barely reaching his ears

“Ryu!” you called out from amongst them, waiting by a door.

“What?” he hadn’t meant to snap, especially when he realized it was you talking to him and his face immediately relaxed when he saw you.

“oh, [y/n].” he immediately started to make his way towards you, the pounding in his head slowly starting to disappear the closer

“I came to pick you up, I’m glad I had good timing,” you smiled, offering your hand.

he took it gently, giving it a soft squeeze, “I’m sorry I responded so rudely, I didn’t–”

“you’re okay, Ryu,” you placed your other hand on top of it, looking him straight in the eyes, keeping a loving smile on your face, “you don’t ever have to be sorry. you’re doing just fine. even better, actually. I’m so proud of all your work and I’m sure you’re tired after everything today. it looked busy.”

the words erased every memory of Mori’s scolding that his head had latched on to in order to beat himself down later on. he felt his cheeks warm a little as he looked away, “you’re too kind to me, [y/n].”

tries his best to also put into words his appreciation but it’s so hard for him to verbally say it; sometimes it comes out wrong

instead, he’s opted for notes most of the time, leaving them on your bedside or in your bag, telling you how thankful he is for you and that he loves you

suehiro tecchou - quality time

“on the train we swapped seats, you wanted the window and I wanted to look at you.” - mahmoud darwish

my boy is always so busy

as soon as he’s off work he just wants to be wherever you’re at

he’d doesn’t mind silence and doesn’t care where he is as long as he’s with you

sometimes gets off work and if you’re not home yet just sneaks into your workplace to be around you

adores following you around and doesn’t always know exactly what you’re doing but he’s just happy to tag along

grocery store dates are some of his favorite moments with you

he loves everything about convenience stores

he loves food and the endless aisles of colorful packages and choices

(it gives him ideas for new food combinations <3)

once bought a himalayan salt shaker simply because

“look [y/n]! they make pink salt :0”

later put said pink salt on top of strawberry ice cream bc they were both pink

he also loves getting to look around the store all the while following you. he admires your organized grocery lists and how you’ve already planned out what you’re going to buy

once you tried to send him out to grab something in an area you’d already passed so that you could continue going down the list

“can you go grab some carrots for me, love? sorry, I forgot to pick them up when we were in the produce section.”

“of course 🙂” his heart is shattering inside of him at the thought of being separated from you.

“do you want to stay with me and we’ll go back later?” you ask, looking up at him with a knowing smile.

“yes pls”

groceries stores are not the only place you guys go tho i promise

if you’re still in school, he’ll accompany you on study dates

never bothers you under any circumstances and if he is and you tell him he’ll stop right away

he could spend all day looking at your pretty face even if you never once looked at him <3

jouno saigiku - physical touch

“you kiss the back of my legs and I want to cry / the sun has come this close, only the sun” “GPS” - Shauan Barbosa

although he can’t see you, he knows your body by heart <3

he’s spent so much time tracing it over and over with his hands

i think his favorite thing to do, especially after a long day at work is flop onto you and just listen to your heartbeat. probably also intertwines one of his hands with yours, often runs other across your skin

loves when you touch him just as much

if he’s lying on top of you and you decide to run a hand through his hair, all of his problems have just melted away

you both have definitely fallen asleep like that countless times no matter what time of day it is

he’s always finding ways to be in close contact with you, making sure that you’re safe and near him

again, he loves loves loves to hold your hand, he’ll reach for it any chance he gets

will also settle for an arm around your shoulder though as long as you’re close to him

definitely the type to also rest his head on top of yours or on your shoulder every chance he gets

if he needs to fidget he won’t even play with his own fingers he’ll just play with yours

i think that with the loss of one sense, the other senses hold so much meaning for him

it’s easier and more meaningful for him to show his love and how much he trusts you through touch rather than just saying it out loud

comes up from behind you to hug you a lot, especially in the kitchen or when you’ve just come home he’s there immediately, hugging you to recharge

“how was your day, my love?”

you always relax in his arms, turning your head slightly to kiss his face which he’s let rest on your shoulder, “it was missing you.”

he placed a chaste kiss on your lips, “i’ll make it all up to you now, darling.”

there was one time that he let you do his hair

he’s never told you how much he enjoyed it; he didn’t even know what you had done to it, but being near your warmth is all he needs and can ask for <3

#dazai x reader #dazai osamu x reader #dazai osamu #chuuya x reader #nakahara chuuya x reader #nakahara chuuya #akutagawa x reader #akutagawa ryunosuke x reader #tecchou x reader #tecchou suehiro x reader #jouno x reader #jouno saigiki x reader #bsd x reader #bsd headcanons

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gremlingottoosilly · 3 months

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does monsters(141, König or Horangi)would ever be interested on their pets toughts? Like their hobbies or thier favorit color and all that stuff 👀

Oh, monster!141 would generally LOVE to have their pet yapping about their hobbies all of the time. Out of all monsters I write for, they are the easiest to live with - if you're not counting the endless sex sessions, of course. If you do have energy to mew about crocheting or video games or literally anything you're interested in, Soap would like to indulge you! He never shuts up when you're with him, always ready for some jokes and banter - and if you say that you like to do something, for example, doing jigsaw puzzles or building legos, he will tear down any abandoned shop to get them for you. He would love to indulge in active hobbies too! But if you like more calm things, he would easily get bored while watching you and would want to fuck you eventually( horny dog(( Gaz is the most stalker-like. He listens to everything you say, and you know that he knows because he literally keeps a journal. This observant and obsessive birdie loves to use information against you - or for you, when he especially brings you jewelry with stones of your favorite colour, for example. He wants to be your favorite, so you can always ask him for things and just yap about things that you like - and be sure that, for a "small" favor, you'd have it given to you the next day. It is still easier than going to Soap because Gaz has the common courtesy of not fucking you while you're drawing or reading. He has a barter system with you - you know that for the newest lego set, he would give you some time to build it and some time for himself to fuck you after. Price is slightly more complicated. Out of everyone, he treats you like a breeder the most - so if you're becoming too energetic for his liking, he would shut you up with making you choke on his cock until you don't want to talk about your favorite musician anymore( he is an old man who needs his bear cubs delivered as swiftly as possible, and he doesn't have much time for anything else. He would indulge in your silent hobbies, let you just spend time with him, warming up his cock while you're struggling while finding puzzle pieces. Don't me mad at him, this man is still struggling not to treat you like a mindless pet...even though you are kinda one.

And Ghost is weirdest of them all. You think he don't even listen to you, but you couldn't be more wrong. This man is troubled and jaded, but he loves to hear your voice - and he sleeps(as much as he can in his state anyway) while listening to you. He is surprisingly observant of your favorite things, even though he doesn't really use it - just sometimes would mention it in a conversation when you already forgot that you basically told this man the whole story of your life while holding him against your chest.

#cod #cod x reader #yandere cod #monster!soap #monster!ghost #monster!gaz #monster!price #price x reader #soap x reader #ghost x reader #gaz x reader #monster!141

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skyloftian-nutcase · 1 year

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...wait we can ask you medical stuff? For fics obviously but like- I have been doing SO MUCH research on how to treat things and trying to find the best examples of medical care available for the boys. ...and this whole time I could've asked you things like how to splint a broken arm? Or what sort of break is easiest to set at home and is most likely the kind a 9 year old might sustain when falling off a tree?

Not that I'm complaining though because honestly I am loving the research and all. But I've been so unsure about what I've been writing because I'm using Google for most of my research and you know how you can get dragged around in circles when using a search engine sometimes? Or worse. It just gives you the same information just rephrased but not actually answering your question? That. Most of my research ends with "go to the hospital" when I really need to know the field medic half of it XD

Asking Dr. Google either ends up with "go see a doctor" or "you're dying" XD XD

I love teaching medical stuff, though, so never be afraid to ask! :D I might not always have an answer immediately but if I don't know I'll research it. Mind you, I just info-dumped below, so I'll put a little cut so it doesn't engulf everyone's dash lol.

How to splint a broken arm: Depends on where the break is, so we'll go through the major ones! Some Broken Bone Basic supplies that you'll need:

Padded splint! In real life they're literally just a wooden board with foam on one side all covered with plastic for easier cleaning - in LoZ land it can be a wooden board with cloth tied around it - kind of like a pillowcase except you really want padding on one side so you don't put a board directly on someone if that makes sense.

Cravats! Some kind of long cloth, like a scarf *cough cough* that can be used to tie things together.

Sling! Not always needed, but definitely needed for upper extremity injuries. To make a sling, take any cloth and fold it so you have a triangle. If you started with a rectangular/square cloth, just take the bottom left corner and bring it to the top right to make your triangle! Once you've got the triangular shape, take the point in the triangle that is opposite of the hypotenuse (ho boy dusting off my math cobwebs) and tie it into a knot. This is your anchor for your patient's elbow. I take the tip, twist it a little bit, form a circle (doughnut) with it, and feed the tip through the whole in the middle of the circle. Ta-da! Got your knot. Also now you have an instant sling! :D

Now let's get into bones!

Broken humerus (your upper arm bone): lay a padded splint over the upper arm. Tie two cravats or pieces of cloth around the splint and the arm, one above the break and one below it. Never tie on a joint! Make sure you tie the knots on the hard side of your splint so you don't have this big tight knot sitting on your patient's arm, they're already hurting enough! Once you've got the splint secured, give them a sling! I'll talk about how to tie the sling to the patient in a minute.

Broken radius and/or ulna, i.e. the two bones in your forearm. Place the padded splint under the forearm, i.e. if their palm is facing the floor, place the splint on the side of their palm. Make sure the splint covers from fingertips to elbow so they can just rest their arm on it. You might need to put like a washcloth or handkerchief bunched up in their palm so their hand can rest without their wrist being at a weird angle. Again, secure the splint to the bone by tying above and below the point where you think it's broken. Do not tie on joints. Add a sling and you're all done!

Broken wrist. Oof, this one hurts. Same song and dance as the forearm, except one of the cravats ties around the fingers/hand rather than both being on the forearm. Be careful, though! And remember to add the sling.

How to tie a sling to a Link patient! Take your anchor, the knot you made, and place it against your Link's elbow. Then you want to feed one corner of your traignular cloth between your patient's affected arm and his chest. This piece then goes over his shoulder. The other side of the triangle goes over the opposite shoulder. Got your untied corners hanging over his shoulders? Good! Now what you want to do is adjust your sling before you tie it! Stand behind your Link and twist those corners until his arm is at an adequate height that is comfortable - not too low, not too high. I usually go for having their arms at a slight angle upwards, not quite parallel to the floor. Once you've got his arm at the right spot, tie the two ends together behind his neck. Try to pad behind his neck where you tie it, put a cloth there or something so the knot isn't on him directly. Final step is to take a different cloth and tie around his slinged arm and his torso on the opposite side to ensure he can't flop his arm around. And ta-daaa you've got a sling!

Important note! Broken bones can do more than just cause pain and, well, broken bones. They can cut blood vessels, pinch nerves, do all kinds of nasty things. Always check to make sure your patient's affected extremity has good blood flow and innervation! Pinch Link's fingernails and make sure they pink up fast. That's called capillary refill and it checks how well he's perfusing. Tell Legend to wiggle his fingers (no, don't flip me off, Ledge, good grief) to ensure he's got good motor nerve innervation and his muscles aren't messed up. Tickle Sky's palm and ask him what you're doing to see if his sensory input is still intact. Check both before and after you splint your patient! You don't want to make their injury worse, after all.

OK! Next questions.

Easiest break to set at home? None of them. Please never set breaks at home. They probably won't heal properly. But if I had to give an answer for writing purposes, probably midline forearm as long as there are no complications? I.e. right in the center of one of their forearm bones. Just know it likely won't heal right if it isn't addressed.

Most likely break you'll find when a kid fall out of a tree? Probably a greenstick fracture in their arm. Greenstick fractures are when the bone only breaks partially and breaks open like when you're trying to snap a stick in half. You know if you snap a still-living stick it kind of just partially splits for you? That's a greenstick fracture. They're really only seen in kids (like pre-teen) because kid bones are still developing. Likely if your kid fell out of a tree they'd try to catch themself with their arm and then snap hello greenstick fracture. Hopefully they don't hit their head too, ouch.

Hope this helps! :D It's a lot of info, if I confused anybody, just ask. Now go make some splints and slings at home, it's fun! :D And comes in handy, I splinted my hand one time when I hurt my wrist at work.

#you ask skye answers #and goes bonkers #lovely anon #this is a simplification of the process but #I'll make all of you first responders before this is over #skye talks medical stuff

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datastate · 1 year

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it's questionable as to how asunaro differentiates bad/good experiences (memory machine) + negative/positive (emotions), and tbh it's kind of silly how it's currently presented in-game, but i'll try to legitimately reason it out anyway.

keeping in mind: asunaro's focus seems to be on human bonds and how they withstand being strained.

to start, emotions have different functions, all that, there are no 'bad' emotions.. although there are some that people prefer not to experience (anger, sadness, jealousy, etc. etc.)

- negative emotions would then be defined as: emotions which have become too strong, which are destructive once they're fueled. you see this with maple foremost. lashing out of envy or frustration. sorrow (which can bleed into either anger (indignation) or happiness (grief)) and guilt which impairs your ability to communicate (preferring isolation) or remain uncooperative. even elation can be detrimental if you're pursuing these things just for the thrill of feeling something (like some dolls+maple, do); it could make you fickle...

- positive emotions are then: gratification and catharsis. from the 'negative' emotions, you eventually receive some relief of any kind. joy, clarity, resolve, etc. it's how you build bonds and all that, through repeated positive experiences with other people. it's also a healthier moderation of anger/sadness/etc., allowing for self-preservation and confidence and so on... though that's another. whole thing.

without the 'positive emotions', as seen in ranger's case, after he's driven to do something with his 'negative emotions', he just... feels 'hollow' once there's nothing else to draw on for his anger. lashing out doesn't satisfy any sort of sadism (as is the case with midori), but just leaves him thinking that all he could do was balance the scales again (like with hinako). i also mentioned this briefly, but from 'positive emotions' you can build up your own appearance/self-confidence - which ranger, imo, doesn't have. he's not necessarily an egotist, he only views everyone else as less than worthy because that's what gashu says; he's a masterpiece, it's simply factual.

speaking of, the easiest example i can think of rn for the difference would be from his inclination toward anger: in this case, on gashu's behalf! but he wouldn't be able to. feel the more 'positive' end of that. he hasn't built a proper bond with gashu at this point - although he trusts gashu, it's situational... mainly because he was involved in his creation. asunaro has the whole - 'live and die by our hand' mindset as well, as seen with kai (attempted) and hinako, and even hiyori... gashu's resolve as well. killing himself for the organization. trust and love in asunaro is distinctly different.

now, memories... hrm.

it depends on the person, possibly. with many people i personally know, more negative experiences have a much stronger impact than casual kindness in day to day. it's the whole - someone could compliment your outfit, but someone else laughs at you tripping. some people would be thinking abt the latter a week later. there's also the whole [gestures] physical impact as well as emotional, to get a memory to stick...

so then, it might be easier at a glance to just rid all 'strong' experiences for this, then. moderation taking priority over both highs and lows. nothing wrong with a simple mundane life... some bonds can last, but the person who's forgotten what they've already withstood would probably pull away much sooner than the other one. with alice's reaction to reko's death feeling much less... emotionally invested. taking on a more objective 'oh, i did care about this person' instead of what it once was...

it'd be worrying if this was the case. but it may very well be, considering the. bad ending, with sara. where she's lost too much of those experiences which built her life and is left with... literally nothing.

alternatively, it could just be michiru somehow handpicking the memories but hm-hm... unsure. & would have me bring in the whole "you're too strong to erase your own memories, which... fucks me up. but! unless there's somehow some ai fuckery here (which i kind of doubt, because with a lot of her projects are presented for human use, it just calls back to 'i believe this is one way of achieving happiness, whatever you may think of it...' - it wouldn't only be for ais would it...?) presumably she means to erase them in the present, as it's only [after the incident] that they'll end up developing ptsd from the events of the death game which would include the whole [faulty memory] (keiji's hallucinations are directly related to his past traumatic experience; kanna and sara are essentially confirmed to have psychosis, which has only been overtly triggered by recent events. ptsd is post-traumatic for a reason.)

#spins around. hi. read my thoughts boy #i hold some issue with how it's presented in-game when laizer is restored but this is how i'm working it out... personally #it's cool figuring this stuff out :] just very. um. long-winded. apologies #jestersvaguely #yttdposting #yttd meta #long post

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doctor-orbagels · 9 months

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How I Draw With Borderline Aphantasia

~Preamble~

Hi! I’m Dr.Orbagels, and even though I have been drawing for most of my life, my brain is a near black void where any images are very hard to make out. This is a condition I would come to know much later as Aphantasia. As you might guess, this was extremely difficult to work with for a very long time. Anyone with similar experiences can relate to needing piles upon piles of references, doing fan art when you felt like you were incapable of something wholly original, and a whole heaping helping of imposter syndrome. So, here I’ll detail my own experience overcoming this massive hurdle in the hopes that it will help others who are having the same struggles!

Important Note:

I am not claiming to speak for everyone who has Aphantasia, nor will my methods work for everyone. As I will get into later, even though i absolutely do have this issue on some level, my case is not nearly as bad as some have it. These are more or less oddly specific tips from someone with an oddly specific condition.

Also, I’m not necessarily the best or most technically proficient artist out there, but I’ve come a long way.

~why “borderline” and what my condition is like~

I think the easiest way to get across how I think is through the most common example of what level of Aphantasia you have:

When you think of an apple, what do you see?

Well, if I were to answer this, it would be something along these lines

Yes, I can see some level of silhouette and almost get a complete image, but it feels like the smaller details and overall outline are very hard to see when thinking of the full picture. However, things become clearer the more I focus on certain parts over others, sort of “zooming in” on what I’m thinking about.

~what I did about it~

This is the main reason I am bothering to post anything about this at all: it took me nearly 15 years of trial and error and struggle after struggle to figure out what I’m doing, and I can’t help but feel that if I was able to just tell past me how I did it, I would have progressed so much faster.

Anyways, first off is even starting a drawing in the first place. I don’t know how relatable this is, but things like anatomy skeletons just do not make sense to me when you can’t really make out the entire image in the first place. So, I much prefer to just zoom in on the image in my head, so to speak, and start with the line that is the most clear. This line is often either towards the top of the image, the part most in the foreground, or whatever feature is most prominent. To use the previous apple example, I’d probably start here:

From there, it’s easier to work your way downwards as you go.

And then start working on where certain details will go

Admittedly, i don’t really specialize in super detailed/realistic shading and rendering and I am completely self taught, so I don’t really have a choice other than to concede that my ability to explain my process kinda ends here. However, I found that tumblr is an amazing place for art tutorials and just getting this far is enough to get the whole train going.

Here’s the part that’s much more difficult to swallow:

The only was I was able to develop this method was from YEARS of freehand copies (i.e. replicating the works of other people as closely as I could). No, this doesn’t mean literally trace other people’s art, nor does it mean that you should even post your freehand copies or hype yourself up for doing them. Freehand copies should be purely for practicing techniques and exploring your art style. Nothing more, nothing less. However, again, this was just how I was able to make things work for myself and eventually do things that were original.

~conclusion and more disclaimers~

This does not mean that I have negated my need for references entirely, nor did it mean I felt the need to abandon making fan art. This method just made it so I was able to make anything original at all. If this makes sense to literally even a single person like me, then I’ve justified posting this.

Finally, I need to reiterate that I am NOT the best artist in the world, nor the most technically skilled. I just know what I know and I’m still getting better.

Here’s some of my most recent art that I’m most proud of. Two finished pieces (Pumpkin Rabbit, being my first digital drawing ever, and the monster with 4 left hands I have named “Windmill”), two WIPs (the MC of a story I’m making and fan art of an old creepypasta i loved as a kid), with two being originals and two being fan art.

#artist on tumblr #trans artist #aphantasia #tutorial kinda but mostly just saying my story and process #digital artist #small artist #self taught artist #neurodivergent #autistic things #actually autistic #i am absolutely going to edit this later when i think of better ways to further explain lol #long post #my wips

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laviesepoursuit · 6 months

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when you realize clichés are just hard hitting truths

i have always stayed close to my journals. i have always loved to chronicle and i have always been a nostalgic person. the (3?) years since my last post have significantly changed me and marked me. it's so interesting how i never prided myself on being a writer; i prided myself on being introspective and reflective. but today, i really appreciate how well i was able to capture who i was back then, the way i expressed myself in those posts. it was like jumping in a time machine and landing in the mind of my younger self. i only wish i had chronicled more.

i've become a fan of lists as of late. here is a summary of my last few years:

started therapy - one of the best decisions of my life

lived the hardest week of my life and said goodbye to the most important person in my life

fell in love with who i thought was the love of my life (again haha)

bared all and faced rejection of the deepest, most intimate kind (the most painful yet in my life)

embarked on the hardest solo trip of my life (despite it being the easiest country to navigate thus far - solely due to my poorly state of mind at the time)

been the kindest to and proudest of myself that i've ever been in my life

if there are any takeaways here, it's that i've lived a lot of personal "superlatives" in the last few years. overall, i'm proud of the way that i push myself to experience the things that scare me. i'm proud of what i do in spite of fear, because i definitely have a lot of fear in me. i'm proud of how much i love and care about people, even if it hurts me. i'm proud of how i try to lead with kindness and empathy. i'm proud of how deeply i feel, and i love how i have been able to bottle these sentiments into photos, blogs and journal entries.

life has knocked me on my ass more times than i'd like to admit, even in the time since the inception of my tumblr. i've done a lot of work on myself to make sure i get back up each time, and to make it easier to do so. over the years, i've learned that these damn clichés hold so much truth and i need to stop thinking they're cheesy or insubstantial. so, here are some heavy hitting clichés that have profoundly resonated with me/changed how i think:

you don't owe anyone anything, even if they feel entitled to it

nobody owes you anything, you are not entitled to anything; you are responsible for your own happiness and emotions

no one can make you feel inferior without your consent (thank u, Eleanor Roosevelt)

you can't pour from an empty cup

what you dislike in others is what you dislike in yourself

boundaries, boundaries, boundaries

life is short, live it to the fullest

i could write a whole dissertation on the meaning behind each of these clichés, and maybe it would serve me to actually do so one day. in the meantime, i'll leave them here as a reminder to myself, for whenever i forget my own agency and feel a little helpless. we are only here for a finite number of years, so why not collect as many experiences as possible? feel as many emotions as possible? expose ourselves to as many literal and metaphorical colours as possible? c'est sûr que la vie se poursuit - ça veut dire qu’elle s’arrête pas. donc, il faut en profiter le plus possible.

biz.

#laviesepoursuit

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social-change-blog-unst242 · 6 months

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Stakeholder Interview

I conducted an interview with a friend of mine named Ximena (above is a photo of her) who I believe is an important stakeholder in DACA as she was an undocumented immigrant that came to the U.S. as a child. She has a major investment in the future of DACA and an important perspective in this issue.

Aliyah: Thank you so much for agreeing to this interview with me. I really appreciate it. Do you just want to jump into the first question?

Ximena: Sure, whatever is easiest for you.

A: Okay. So we’ve talked about your family history before so I know that you are someone who met the criteria for DACA. Do you think it would have been meaningful and impactful for you to be able to receive DACA?

X: I think during the situation when I especially needed it would have been. You know, the fact that I came here at a young age, I wasn’t even one, there’s just so many opportunities that I don’t get to pursue because of that, just not having any form of status. So when I first tried at the time since Trump was in presidency there was just no way I could receive it but it would have made life, before I got my green card, it would have made life so much easier. But yeah, definitely.

A: Yeah, that is a very tough situation. So my next question would be, you talked about the Trump presidency and not being able to receive DACA and I was wondering what reaction you had when you learned about the program being stopped, stripped away.

X: I was very upset. I feel like that is an understatement but I was just very upset because being someone who comes to the U.S., it stands for Deferred Action for Childhood Arrivals, you have no point in it. You come in and it's not even your own will, you’re kind of brought against your own will. You leave your homeland, you're coming to a new place and when I found out it was stopped I was so upset like I was like how in the world am I supposed to even survive here. I mean, I know that sounds dramatic but honestly, you need to work in order to provide for yourself and having a family, that as well. How can I do that if I'm not literally allowed to do it. So I was very upset. I'm not the only one in this situation, there's many people in this situation and it just makes things even more difficult for all of us because it’s like, oh like we wanna do things, the government like to put it, the right way, but how do we do it the right way if you’re not helping us do it the right way.

A: Yeah, if there’s no way to actually go about that process.

X: Yeah exactly. I completely agree because it’s just difficult, it's very difficult and especially being someone who doesn’t understand the situation. Most people, they don’t have to deal with that. It's hard to have that sense of awareness because it’s like, well it doesn’t impact you in any way, so I feel like a lot of people just shrug it off because they’re like, oh okay it’s just another program that’s been shut down. No, no, this is a big deal, this is a really big deal because in a way even though I wasn’t born in this country I consider this country my home because it’s all I’ve known.

A: Yeah, for almost all your life!

X: Literally. Yeah it’s hard, it’s very hard.

A: Yeah. So you mentioned that you were able to get your green card and so my next question is was that process an emotionally taxing one because I know that it can be a very difficult process and I imagine it could be emotionally taxing.

X: Yeah because especially at that time, I was very lucky you know, I wasn't living with my family at the time. I was considered a ward of the state, so I was in foster care. So because I was considered the state's property, I know they don’t like to put it that way but, they had that sense of like legal guardianship over me. It was their way of helping me and although this whole time I knew it was a good opportunity, it was very hard because luckily I worked with a non profit so I didn’t have to really pay much out of pocket but even then it was really hard for me because I just kept thinking about other people, other people in my same situation who aren't given that opportunity and they’ve had to do other things just to be even able to work., like working under the table. They get desperate, which makes sense. And all I kept thinking was like, I'm not the only one, and like yes the situation is difficult but it's so sad that not all of us get to have that opportunity. It was very difficult. Very difficult, and it took several years too.

A: Yeah, I can imagine, yeah. I mean it not only is it a difficult process, like you mentioned it a very lengthy one because of all the bureaucratic red tape.

X: And during the entire process, you're not guaranteed. They're helping you but they're like, at the end of the day if you don't receive any form of status it's not on them. When it comes to congress, it is so difficult because it’s like my attorney at the time, he had this saying where when it comes to congress they have their own timing. We honestly can’t predict when things will be processed, or when they will see your things, or anything like that so it was just very, I don’t want to say disheartening but there were times when I was just like I don’t even know if I’m going to get it. Thank God I did but at the moment I just felt like, what if we're doing all of this and nothing happens. It's a lot, definitely.

A: Yeah, definitely. So my next question would be what kind of change would you like to see happen regarding DACA, are there specific goals or things you are hoping to see happen with congress?

X: Well for starters opening it up again would be really, really, helpful because I’m not sure about the situation at the exact moment but I know at the time when I did try to apply it was closed and luckily they allowed people to renew like their applications but they weren’t accepting new applicants so I think doing something along those lines would be good. If there’s a way for people who come to the U.S., especially being underage, if there’s a way for them to have some form of protection that would be really, really, good. I think that would be my main thing, opening it up and luckily there are some non profits within the area but it’s really hard to get to work with them so maybe making it easier you know, if there’s certain criteria people have to fall under just to receive that help. Because even just seeking legal help, I don’t know if counseling the right term, but legal guidance like te cobran. They’re charging you, and not everyone can afford it, especially not that I want to consider Latinos stereotyped but a lot of us, we’re lower income so it’s very difficult to even afford it.

A: Yeah, especially if you’re undocumented and you can work.

X: Exactly! Sometimes I catch myself thinking like I remember when my mom and I were first applying for an I-10, it’s not a social security number but you can use it so you can file your taxes, but I kept thinking they want us to do our taxes but they don’t allow us to work. I feel like it’s just a full circle because people just don’t realize how much goes into it.

A: Definitely, yeah. So my next question is do you personally feel like you engage in advocacy for DACA? What I mean by that is like do you feel like you do things to try and advocate for the continuation of DACA.

X: Personally I know I could do a better job, but I feel like the methods I’ve been doing now are whenever I do interact with people who are curious about the process, or like whenever I share, oh I’m undocumented but don’t worry I’m legal. Once you introduce yourself to someone, and you get to know a person, and it comes up I’ll talk to them about it and many people have a lot of misconceptions about it, or they just don’t know a lot so just from that itself, when people actually ask, people close to me, or people who are just curious about it, I’ll share. When it comes to doing more, like spreading more awareness I don’t know if I’ve done enough of it so I think implementing that would be good just so more people know. But especially at the time when like Trump first did that I know it was a major thing on social media where people who were concerned about it were spreading it within social media and I took part in that too because this is crazy, obviously not everyone is aware of the situation, but like why wouldn’t we want to fix this if that makes any sense.

A: Yeah no, definitely. I completely understand and I don't think that there’s any right or wrong way to go about advocating. So my next question is what prevents you from, as you were saying, doing more. I just am aware that there are a lot of different barriers that come up trying to be an advocate and all of that so I’m just curious what your view is on that.

X: I think now I’m more open to it cause I know for a fact, I worked through it, I got my workers permit, I have my green card now, there’s not anything I’m currently doing where it would be considered illegal but before I even had any form of status l was just very scared. Because obviously everyone has different views about the situation. There’s people who feel strongly about having Latinos here so just that itself was a major fear and when Trump was in presidency, there was “build the wall.” It was scary, that time was very scary for me. I remember going to school and unluckily I would interact with people who were very racist and they’d be like oh you need to go back to your country or like I don’t even know why you're here and just stuff like that. All this talk about the U.S. being such a welcoming country, which at times it can be, but there’s moments where it just felt very hostile and I think that definitely held me back a lot. Now I’m good, I’m a resident, I’ve earned it, I’ve worked hard. Just give me a couple more years and eventually I can apply for citizenship because having a green card, you have to wait a certain amount of time and do the whole paperwork and then the process before you can even apply. So I’m not an alien. At the end of the day, we all our own ancestry’s and we all have our ways of we came to be where we are today so now I share proudly because it’s something where it took a lot a lot of hard work not just for me but my entire family just so I can be like okay, I don’t have to deal with that fear of being deported you know. Because it is something I feel like a lot of people especially in our culture deal with. On the daily “oh you have to be careful, oh we don’t want to do this, oh we don’t want to do that” because like uno nunca sabe, you never know what’s gonna happen. It's better to be safe than sorry, if that makes any sense.

A: Definitely yes, one of my earliest memories is helping my dad study for his citizenship test so I understand

X: You can understand, for sure.

A: So my last question is there something you wish more people understood about DACA or even just the experience of being an immigrant.

X: When it comes to Daca I wish people just had more empathy towards it because they’re children. These are kids migrating from one country to another and just having the sense of awareness. Think about it, this is a kid, this wasn’t within their power, they were just doing what their family felt was the best move for all of them. Not every single person that migrates from another country into this country is here to cause destruction. We all just are here because obviously there’s more benefits here so just having that awareness, just having that in your mind. It’s not like they’re trying to make things difficult, no, we all just are here because we want a better life. And there’s not much of a difference between someone who wasn’t born here and someone who was. All of my siblings were born here and I just happened to be born on the other side of the border. We��re not that much different like I go to school, I do pretty much things that people do here. Just having that sense of like these are literally just kids. They’re just trying to get through it. So I feel like when it comes to DACA that especially. And with just being undocumented understanding like I said earlier we don’t just come here just because we feel like we have to no, there’s moments where just in your home country it just isn’t safe, there just isn’t enough opportunities for work or you just need to make that change not just for yourself but for your family too so I think just having that I don’t know, openness would make it easier not necessarily harder because I feel like the main misconception that people have with undocumented immigrants or just immigrants in general it just they don’t realize our intentions. They think we’re just here to make things worse which is just not the situation at all. No, I’m just trying to get a job like everyone else. It’s definitely a very touchy subject because for most people, it doesn’t involve them so they have no reason to really think about it.

A: Yeah definitely, Alright that concludes our interview. Thank you so much for sharing. I really appreciate your time.

X: Of course!

#immigration #immigrants #daca #defenddaca #dreamers #dreamact

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kitakeo · 2 years

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your SOCIAL ANXIETY guide to ORDERING FOOD from a [shitty burger chain] CASHIER

hey are u terrified of ordering food. yeah me too and it's literally my job i live in constant anxiety . but lemme lay down some stuff

1) most importantly. You are in my life for all of like 10 minutes max. I will not remember who you are unless you are exceptionally rude to me. Did you stutter? Did you say the wrong thing? Did you have to ask for some changes to the item? You're the 30th person to do that today it's chill. I will never think about you again

2) if I'm not bright and cheery or smth then please know a lot of us are like , 1 week into this job and already expected to manage the drive through and front register recieving, filling and giving orders as one person for six hours straight. If I'm exhausted or blunt i swear it's not you unless you've been rude. You're not an inconvenience and it is not your fault for irresponsible management overworking us. If you wanna show courtesy just be like "hang in there/you're doing great" or smth bc it shows you get it yk it feels nice haha

3) I'm sure this varies from brand to brand but honestly coupons are SUPER easy. A little four digit code and a whole order comes up and i don't have to try to make out from the shitty broken drive thru speakers? Hell yeah dude. I do not give a single shit about the store not making as much money it is not my problem

4) if you ask for extra sauces or a free water or something and there's no manager around I'll slide you some. If there is I'd have to say no. Just accept whatever answer you're given and it's cool

5) Take your order step by step instead of all at once. Ik you have it rehearsed and just wanna get it out and thats cool for some cashiers but for me it's easiest if people continue once i say "okay". If you do say it all at once tho it's cool some people can do that and if we can't we'll repeat stuff back to you just be patient yk. I'm probably an exception bc i have auditory processing issues (no i should not have this job but i gotta afford my meds somehow BSNSN)

6) if we got something wrong with your order once it's out you have a right to come speak to us about it. We'll never be upset (if we're decent people haha, my stores all cool) but just be patient since to work w the system we usually need a manager. If it doesn't bother you then it's fine too but don't feel like a bad person for getting what you paid for

7) pls do know what you're having before you speak... Like it's okay to not know exactly what to say but the worst is people changing their order 73 times at the window bc once I've confirmed an item i have to go get a manager to change it. This happens all the time though it's okay but if you're super anxious ab being as convenient as possible then yeah yk

8) Taking orders from drive through kinda suckksss bc they do not replace those speakers ever. If i have to ask several times what you said I'm so sorry haha it's not your fault. If there's no one ahead of you and you wanna just drive up to the window it's cool to ask that bc it's usually easier for both of us to hear

9) If there's numbers for meals, it's easier if you say the number. It doesn't rly matter but just a little note for you

10) Again. You are in my life for 10 minutes max. Don't scream at me don't insult me and i won't remember you. I might remember your dog but I will retain zero information about you bc chances are you are a normal ass customer. Even if you switched your order around its literally fine you are not some weight on us, just know you might have to be a little patient. Patience is literally all i ask haha you could ask me to mix all the drinks together and I'd be like chill no problem as long as you patiently wait for it. Today i got screamed at by some 50 year old for taking 7 minutes to get his breakfast sandwich bc i was the only one on drive through. Don't be that and you're chill.

11) oh yeah also if you're like a femme presenting high schooler you are my fave customers haha. I see y'all come in and I relax a sec bc I've never had anyone of that group ever be mean and y'all are always so patient thank you. Thank u to anyone who's patient I'm really trying i promise.

#literally random ass post for my blog but yk #other fast food workers feel free to chime in #and feel free to ask any questiond #anxiety #social anxiety

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carriereedwrites · 2 years

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HOW TO (NOT) START A BOOK

Listen... this shouldn't be hard, people. But, starting a book really is one of THE hardest things to do.

The thought is daunting, the process overwhelming. The whole thing is enough to make giving up seem like the easiest route.

But, did Frodo give up on his journey to take the One Ring back to Mordor?

NO. BECAUSE HE HAD A SAMWISE GAMGEE. LET ME BE YOUR SAMWISE GAMGEE.

So, I figured it'd be easier to start with the naughty no-nos. One, because it's funny (and I think I'm pretty funny). Two, because you need to know what's incorrect before you can value what IS correct. Let's get started.

Warning: this is gonna be a rant. You've been warned.

Stare at your blank page and freak out

We've all been here. Anxiety creeps in and your Imposter Syndrome whispers in that creepy voice, "Yoooouu suuuckk baaallllsss." Tell that mother fucker IT SUCKS BALLS.

Don't freak out. Don't show weakness. Show that fucking blank page or word document who the hell is in charge around here. Write, damn it!

Who cares if it sucks? It's your first draft. IT'S GOING TO SUCK.

Get stuck world building for four years and have yet to write a single sentence

I get it. I'm guilty of this, too. You have this SUUUPERR AWESOME UNIQUE world in your head that demands you put all of your creative effort in to and by Gandalf's Beard, YOU HAVE BEEN CHOSEN TO BRING IT TO LIIIFFEEE.

Reality Check: it shouldn't take you more than a few months to get everything down. Everything important, anyways. Unless you work a full time job, go to school or parent tiny demons from hell, world building shouldn't take you YEARS going on a DECADE.

Neither should writing books. I'm looking at you, Georgie Boy. #iykyk

Convince yourself that you haven't bought the right pen, notebook or found the right writing software to express yourself with

My secret shame. Oh, the shame. My super secret shame? I still convince myself of this.

The only way to get around this is to just fucking do it and make do with what you got. It won't please your brain. It'll be angry, wrathful even, and badger you relentlessly like a Nazgul. But, you have to trick it in order to get to Bree-- I MEAN, in order to start your story.

*GASP* BUT, WHAT WILL MY FAMILY AND FRIENDS THINK OF ME IF I WRITE THIS?!

Listen, listen, listen... literally... this is what pen names (or Nom de Plumes, for you fancy writers) are for. You don't have to think of one right this moment. But, pressure off, guys. C'mon.

Also, as much as we would like our loved ones' support, they don't always "get" it, and think this is a hobby or passing fancy and not take it as seriously as you do.

What you should do is surround yourself with like-minded people or people who support you even if they don't "get" being a writer. It's those people who's unconditional love will get you through the hardest of times.

And my favorite: You will never be able to write like [insert revered author of all time here]

Shaddup. Just... shaddup. You will NEVER write like the authors you admire. That's. The. Fucking. Point.

YOU are YOU. Your responsibility as an artist is to breathe new life into old hats. Or some obscure inspirational bullshit like that. Readers will love what you write because it's uniquely YOU. Readers appreciate fresh, new takes on the same old tropes.

And if you're trying to emulate a classic author like Ol' JRR, you can't. We may still enjoy his stories today, but he wrote in a different time with different genre expectations (as in... he literally pioneered the genre... like... it's kind of hard to do in today's world. Not impossible, mind you. Just really freaking hard).

And that's it. My list on how to not start a book. Sorry, this one was a little aggressive, but... ya'll need to get aggressive. Writers can be a sensitive bunch that often need a good kick in the behind to get past those nasty blocks.

What are your resons for not starting a book? What have I missed? What are some of the ways you've gotten past the first sentence? Let me know!

~ Happy Writing, Ya'll ~

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twstmemories · 2 years

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Love Languages for Jamil, Ruggie, and Floyd? Both with giving and receiving please! tyyyy <33

-- ! we ignore the fact i had no idea what love languages were before i got asked this, and the fact i wrote too much again-but i hope you find these enjoyable, because I had a real great time writing them out! Espeically Floyd,

✧ The love languages for Jamil Viper, Ruggie Bucchi & Floyd Leech [Both receiving and giving - headcanons]

✧ gn!reader

Giving: Acts of service

✧ This really shouldn't come as a surprise to most of you. Jamil has lived and is still living the entirety of his life as a servant meant to make their masters life a bit easier. Being quick on his feet and knowing the most plausible and easiest way to make your time with him easier is a major trait of his you will come to realize early on in your relationship. (´ ∀ ` *)

✧ Handing your favorite beverage to you upon meeting up, having some extra snacks in case you get a tad bit hungry as you spend your time together. Personally getting up and bringing whatever you have ordered to your table and carrying shopping bags if you happen to buy anything. He even has all the neccesities needed if you come across a tiny problem. This man has everything you can think of. There's not a single moment when you're stressed when you're with him. Jamil won't allow you to get stressed in his presence. He wants you to have an enjoyable time with him after all.

✧ If you're spending time with him at his dorm, he won't let you lift a single finger unless you're studying. You want some water? Oh just relax he can get it for you, and while he's at it he might as well just whip up a homemade snack for you after you had mentioned you loved his cooking. You're a bit cold? Oh he can get you the warmest blanket they have that's perfect for the weather and won't make you too warm but not too cold either. Is there anything else you need, whatever it is he's sure he can get it for you, just say the word: "Ah, and don't think you can hide anything from me, I'm very good at reading people, just tell me what you need alright? It's truly of no bother to me, I do want you to be the most comfortable around me after all," he will most likely say with a small peck to your forehead when you voice your concern to his back and forth walking to tend to your needs. (*￣▽￣)b

Receiving: Words of affirmation & Acts of service

✧ Please appreciate and compliment him whenever he's doing stuff for you. Tell him you love him, that you're grateful for him, that he's doing such a wonderful job and that he deserves so much because he's so precious, please. He doesn't let it show on his face, but with every compliment or words of praise from you just makes his heart skip a beat. Every. Single. Time. You never fail to surprise him whenever you thank him with a smile and a hug or kiss when he comes back after getting you something. It can be as simple as him getting you a glass of water and while he expects it at this point, the moment you hug him and tell him you love him, his heart just skips.

✧ He won't let you or let you know he's feeling like this, but every time you ask him to let you do something for once he just dies a little inside. He's a servant, he's used to moving around and doing a lot of things at a fast speed. But you're staring at him with a worried look and angry frown: "I want you to relax more when you're with me, you're already running around on a daily basis, so at least let me help you when we're alone?" Hook, line and sinker. You have his whole heart, but he still won't let you. (￣▽￣)

✧ So the trick here is to not ask him! You just do it! Your handiwork isn't as good as his, but if you were to come by and give him a handmade lunch box with a note attatched to it proclaiming whatever adoration you have for him it will be the first time anyone will see Jamil quite literally flush red. Or if you were to reverse the roles and give him something he favors when you meet up, Jamil will be flabbergasted while the two of you exchange whatever you have brought each other. Jamil appreciates it a lot when you go out of your way to make him feel loved both through words and actions.

✧ But really, words of praise, genuine excitement over his achievements, nervously asking him to help you with something because he's that good but you don't want to bother him and giving him the same treatment as he gives you. Please he's on cloud 9 with every action and he's literally engraving everything you do into his brain and soul. He can and will do every request you ask without question because that's just how his mind works, but you're over here telling him he's already doing enough, doesn't need to do more and will return the favor even when he denies you so. You tell him his presence is enough, but after time your presence is enough for him as well. (´ ω `♡)

Giving: Quality time

✧ To be honest, Ruggie's love language could just as much be acts of service as well seeing how far he's willing to go to help someone that can be of benefit for him (who is also superior and has wealth, a.k.a Leona) But for his lover, I feel like him spending time with you willingly and not out of some outer motive is the biggest sign he can give you to say that he loves you. Because Ruggie will spend his time accordingly by trying to do something that will gain him a bit more coin for his folks back at the slums. Him sharing that precious amount of time each day with you is a big thing in his dictionary. ♡ ～('▽^人)

✧ You don't have to do anything either! If you're doing something then it's just a plus for him really, but you can also just be relaxing and he will be there until another affair comes up. And to be honest, I feel like he would love the more relaxing times than the busy times because he can then relax. This boy really needs to just sit down for a minute and not do anything, it's the thing he needs the most in my opinion.

✧ But if you were to spend your time with him while he's running around like a headless chicken, he will be so grateful and fall in love a bit more. You would most likely know why he's so busy or why he's doing Leonas' bidding so readily, and yet you choose to spend time with him rather than doing something else. He will come to appreciate you so much. If you even offer to help him with other stuff together or apart, he will be genuinely shocked. And not let you go somewhere off alone since he comes to appreciate and love your presence around him. "When were you so eager to leave? You won't need to leave before me when this can get done faster with two sets of hands, let's finish this quick and then go together to the next place, alright?" He will say the first part with a slight teasing tone, but the pure smile on his face and the look of adoration says otherwise. (ノ*°▽°*)

Receiving: receiving gifts- Acts of service & Words of affirmation

✧ What goes around, comes around! Ruggie runs himself ragged almost everyday whether that be due to doing Leonas' bidding or doing work that gives him some sort of reward. Having a lover that will make his already hectic life a bit easier is something he will appreciate a lot! If you're not going out of your way to spend time with him already, the few times he bumps into you while running around you somehow have something on you to give him. Whether that be a bottle of water or his favorite snack with the question of when he's done with todays work.

✧ When you manage to catch him and quite literally force him to take a very short break, you're always fussing over him. Dabbing his sweaty skin with a handkerchief you always have around while murmuring to him to not overexert himself too much since his body is just as precious as everyone else. He has to register those words a bit: "Can- Can you say that again?" please tell him as many times as you can after that, he goes redder and redder with every compliment he quite literally runs away with a high pitched "Thank you!" for the refreshements. ⊂(￣▽￣)⊃

✧ If you were to actually give him something, he has half the urge to see how much it's worth. And he's aware you know he's thinking about it. But then another side of him kicks in where he realizes this is something you bought specifically for him. He has something he owns now. And when that realization hits that the item in his hands is something you picked specifically with him on your mind, he can't get himself to get rid of it. It almost makes him tear up: "Shishishi, to think you think of me that much that you're buying me something now too ~ You don't think I'll sell this at all?" He knows you're aware he won't with that knowing smile of yours when he says that. And for a second he pouts before bringing you into a hug, thanking you under his breath.

Giving: Quality time & Physical touch

✧ Floyd is a hugger and loves to spend time with his favorite person! His way of showing you how much he loves you is shown in the amount of time he goes out of his way to find you and spend time with you! Much to Azuls' and Jades' dismay since that means Mostro Lounge will lack an employee most of the time. But the moment he knows classes are over, he's running over to your class with a beaming smile yelling out your name, he gets to finally spend some time with you after all!

✧ You don't need to do anything, if he just knows you're around Floyds mood just instantly gets better! And it's why your presence is such a double-edged sword! If you're not around and Floyd physically can't see you, his mood is terrible until you show up. The moment you appear you can see the merman visibly perk up and Azul let out a sigh of relief as he's bounding over to you at full speed and quite literally crushes you to his chest. He missed you a lot. Azul and Jade too, you saved Mostro Lounge from a disaster yet again, bless your presence. 人(_ _*)

✧ Is not afraid to show the whole world that he loves you. He's frequently seen hugging you or holding your hand. There's not a moment when Floyd is in your presence that he doesn't have a hand on you. It makes him happy that he's able to be so close to you after all! Not shy at all and doesn't give a darn about anyone else, if he wants to kiss you he will kiss you. It can be teasing kisses to get you flustered or quick kisses that he peppers all over your face to make you laugh. "Hehe, your cheeks are all red! Does my kisses make you that embarassed?" he will say with a laugh, proceeding to kiss you again just to see how much more red you can get. (つ≧▽≦)つ

Receiving: Quality time & Physical touch

✧ What Floyd loves to give, he loves to recieve as well! If you were to be just as happy as him when he's running over to you, his mood gets 10 times better! If he were to see you sit by the wall next to the gymnasium door watching him practice, he gets even more fired up! Someone save Ace. If he sees you sitting by a table at Mostro Lounge, he will ignore the customer he was tending and skip over to you and sit beside you to not make you feel lonely! But not before asking you what you want for today, after all you're his customer now ~

✧ To be honest, the happiest time anyone ever sees him is when you're visiting Octavinelle or Mostro Lounge, since he spends quite a lot of time there after school hours. You come over and visit that often that Azul even has a table reserved for you specifically so that Floyd can immediately go back and forth between you and customers. Every time FLoyd glances over to your table, he will already see you staring at him with a smile, the rare times you don't he stares long enough until you can feel him staring and look up from whatever you were working on. When you notice him, he gives you the biggest grin before hopping over: "Hehe, I didn't even need to say anyting, and you noticed me right away!" (o´▽`o)

✧ If you're shy with physical touch, but still go out of your comfort zone to give him kisses or initiate hugs, Floyd will stare at you with literal stars in his eyes. If you're hanging around after Mostro Lounge has closed and Azul is calculating profit of the day with Floyd and Jade, if you were to just come behind Floyd and hug him he will whip his head around to look at you with a smile before giving you a quick peck on the lips. Azul and Jade doesn't mind anymore, they're used to it. Whenever you initiate hugs, he happily accepts them, hugging you gentler than normal than when he hugs you.

✧ He absolutely loves, loves when you pepper kisses all over his face. It brings out such a joyful and pure laugh from the merman. If you try to pull away after initiating he won't let you! You're peppering him with kisses until he's satisfied. Straddle his lap, let him hug you close to him and squish his cheeks together and continue pepper kisses all over his face. Even if he doesn't see you for the rest of the day, that little kissing session is enough to make him the happiest for the day! But only for that day, he will need more kisses the next day if you want to continue making this eel happy! (≧◡≦) ♡

#twst #disney twst #twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland x reader #twisted wonderland headcanons #twisted wonderland imagines #twst x reader #twst headcanons #twst imagines #jamil viper x reader #jamil viper headcanons #ruggie bucchi x reader #ruggie bucchi headcanons #floyd leech x reader #floyd leech headcanons #not proofread #is it a suprise at this point that i don't proofread anything?

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4rdcorners · 2 years

Text

MANIFESTATION GUIDE CHAPTER 4

by solar

how to be the person you’ve always wanted to be:

first, you have to identify who you want to be; who are they?

what do they do for a living?

what’s their physical appearance?

what’s their hobbies?

what’s their friends like?

what’s their style?

what’s their impression on people?

what’s their financial status?

think of any and everything that you want to have/embody.

you don’t have to script this, if you like visualizing, visualize it. this is not necessary, but it’s to make you happy and know what you’re going to become. make this fun, you’re creating yourself! make it personal!!! it’s the way YOU want to be, don’t adjust just cos of “somebody”, they’re only you pushed out ;).

if you forget something to add, don’t worry about it. your subconscious has the whole checklist ready.

the next step is to set the intention and keep persisting in the fact that you’re going to be that person/you are that person (whichever is easier for you). know your manifestations are inevitable. note that this is the easiest thing to manifest, everything is so easy for you to manifest.

if you need help having faith in your power, then manifest “little” things that will lead you to the path to your success. like, manifesting $20 or manifesting getting compliments. anything that will help you figure out how powerful you are!

the 3D plays a big part in this. to embody the person that you want to be, you must know your 3D will and is going to change. the whole world is at your command, baby. i wouldn’t say don’t look for results, but when you’re looking in the mirror, just know you’re morphing into that person literally every second. do not doubt that your manifestations are coming. the world has to comply to you.

it might be hard but, i know you can do it! your self concept ties into this, remember that your manifestations have to come no matter what. your 4d world already has it, so it has to mirror into your 3d.

the last step is to use whatever technique you like to help you persist:) if you like affirmations here are some:

i am turning into the person i want to be.

i get everything i want.

my life confirms into the way i want it to be.

all aspects of my life are ideal.

i’m perfect, so is my life.

you can use any affirmations of your choice, and do any method of your choice. it’s all up to you and how you feel!!

once you start persisting in that new story, know your realities are shifting every moment. you are god, god controls all. just keep persisting and it will show. repeat that new story, not the old one, we’re not her anymore.

how to manifest 'made up people':

they only exist if you say so, you're in command.

identify how you want them to be.

what are they to you?

what do they look like?

how do they behave?

what’s their hobbies?

what’s their financial status?

etc.

remember if you forget anything you subconscious will just fill in the blank for you, so don’t worry about it.

the last step is to live in the end. now, you already have that person in your life. your 4d (inner world) already has that because you planted the seed of that person. just persist in the fact that you’ve already met them, you already have them in your life. always persist in the new story, not the old.

NOTE

with these two things, you should never be ‘humble’ or limit yourself. remember this is YOUR life, why would you want less? shift your reality to fit your life.

everyone is you pushed out:

eiypo is pretty much your assumptions pushed onto people. this could be your assumptions about yourself, or about other people.

here’s a story:

a woman kept affirming and persisting in her being abnormal. her and her husband adopted a baby girl, who did not speak until she was 4. why did she start speaking? because the woman started affirming and persisting in the fact that she was normal.

her assumption about herself projected onto another person, a person within her imagination.

so how do we change someone we already know?

just like how the woman did it! whatever you’re assuming about them (a trait you don’t like), assume the opposite.

for example:

your sp has been distant. you know what you will do? affirm & persist in the fact that he is obsessed with you and messages you CONSTANTLY. that will conform.

remember:

your 3d will always conform to your assumptions. entertain the inner woman, as she’s the one that can transform your life. the 3d woman is just a copy of the state your inner woman is in.

need proof of this? literally all your assumptions are played out. you look at your geometry homework and you tell yourself that this is hard, and isn’t it??? all your assumptions show. your assumption about your sp, your life, yourself, it all shows.

to change that all you need to do is assume a new assumption & persist in it. that’s it. we think it’s so hard because we don’t see it in our 3d yet. but, we only live to entertain our inner woman. our inner woman projects everything in our lives. once we figure out how to use her, we can’t be stopped !

there’s never a ‘live as if’. you are your inner woman, your inner woman does all the work while you receive. you just tell her what to do. now, all you have to do is relax. persist in the assumption that you have your desire, and it will come to fruition.

note:

this was the last chapter of the manifesting guide series but i hope u guys liked it & gained a lot more information !! mwah stop overconsuming

#manifesting mindset #law of assumption #law of attraction #manifestyourreality #neville goddard #witchy #divine feminine #joseph murphy #law of abundance #loa #manifesting abundance #witchyvibes #witchblr #self concept

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fruitcoops · 3 years

Note

I think it would be really interesting for leo and sirius to talk ab how they both didn’t go to college and how they both joined the nhl at 18 but had v different upbringings

Ooo, I like this one! I’m always down for some Cap and Knutty bonding. SW credit goes to @lumosinlove!

TW for mentioned bad parenting

“Kinda weird, isn’t it?” Leo said, breaking the nighttime silence after many long minutes of just their breathing. Sirius hummed in question. “Starting all this so young.”

Sirius made a noncommittal noise and Leo shifted, never taking his eyes off the sky. There was too much light pollution to see the stars properly in Gryffindor, but the roof of the rink didn’t have a bad view; the planes flying overhead brought pinpricks of brightness to the indigo blur.

“Was it hard for you?”

He heard Sirius’ coat move. “Was what hard?”

“Starting the NHL at eighteen.”

There was a long beat of silence. “Sometimes.”

“I didn’t know if I would make it,” Leo confessed, still barely above a murmur. Nobody else was around, but it didn’t feel right to talk in normal voices. The whole world was muted, save for the noise of the city below them. “There was just so much to do.”

Sirius laughed softly. “I hate to break it to you, rookie, but that doesn’t change.”

“How do you deal with it?”

“Before, or now?”

Leo thought for a moment. “Both.”

“Before, I would go home and shoot pucks until I was too tired to stand up. Sometimes I would read.” It wasn’t a secret, but it still made Leo’s heart hurt to remember. Nobody as kind and hardworking as Sirius deserved that. “Now, I make myself some food, take a shower, and steal Re’s softest hoodie.”

Leo could hear his smile in the dark—it echoed his own. “Nothing better, huh?”

“Nope.”

“Finn’s fit me best,” he mused. “But Lo’s smell better.”

“Ah, he finally discovered deodorant?”

“Shut up,” Leo teased, elbowing his ribs. Sirius laughed a little louder; in the light of the streetlamps and the absence of his granite-hard focus, it was easy to remember that he was only 26. Leo had worshipped him as a kid, but now he just saw Sirius for what he was. His captain, who guided him through the playoffs even when his personal life was crumbling apart. His older brother, though Sirius certainly wouldn’t think of him that way. His friend.

“Really, though, it’s important to have those connections,” Sirius said when they both calmed down. “Being alone is good, but only if you know you have people to talk to when you need them.”

“Was it easier when you weren’t living with someone?”

“No.” The answer was immediate.

“Sometimes I want the apartment to myself.” Leo lowered his voice unconsciously, then sighed. “It’s not because I don’t want them there. I just need to be alone. Wash the dishes. Clean my room. Call my mom.”

“You should tell them.”

He turned his head slightly; Sirius was still scanning the sky. “Is that what you did?”

“It took a couple hiccups, but yeah. If one of us needs some alone time, the other will go to the grocery store or take a walk, maybe hang out with friends. You just have to make sure your boys know that it’s not personal.”

“You’re freakishly good at sage advice.”

Sirius snorted. “Merci, rookie.”

“I’m not a rookie anymore.”

“Yeah, you are.” He raised his hands, as if outlining a marquee. “The Eternal Rookie, starring Leo Knut.”

Leo stuck his tongue out, feeling rather petulant about the whole thing. “Watch it, Cap, I’m gonna sic Dumo on you.”

“My own father?” Sirius gasped dramatically. “How could you?”

“Did you ever get homesick?”

The question was out of the blue—he didn’t blame Sirius for faltering. Honestly, Leo was kicking himself for asking in the first place, though he had been keeping it in for ages. Unspoken rule of the Lions #1: Don’t ask Cap about his childhood.

“I…” Sirius fell silent once more.

“I’m sorry,” Leo apologized, and he meant it. “That came out of nowhere.”

“I missed Regulus,” Sirius continued carefully without acknowledging him. “But no, I didn’t get homesick. I didn’t have time, or a real reason.”

Alone in a new city, finally out of a horrible living situation, but desperately missing the little brother he left behind… Leo couldn’t even begin to imagine going through it when the NHL by itself was already overwhelming to his teenage brain. He scooted an inch closer until their shoulders touched. “I get homesick every couple of months.”

“You have a kind family.”

“Have you even met them?”

“At the party.” Sirius’ smile was practically audible. “Your mother was very excited to see me.”

“Oh, god,” Leo groaned. “What happened?”

“She—“ He broke off with a laugh. “She was very nice, I promise, but I think I surprised her because she squeaked when I said ‘hello’.”

Leo shook his head. “Did you sneak up on her?”

“I’m six two, I can’t sneak up on anyone!”

“You walk like a fucking ghost, dude! It’s creepy!”

“Okay, rude.”

“I swear, you and Loops need to be belled like cats,” Leo huffed.

They lapsed back into comfortable quiet for a few more minutes as a train rattled past on one side and the metro busses rolled down Main Street on the other. It had taken Leo a long time to figure out Gryff’s layout, and even longer to get used to the sounds of the city.

“What does it feel like?”

Leo blinked, unsure if he had heard correctly. “What?”

“Being homesick.” Sirius shifted again and folded his hands over his stomach. “I didn’t notice much of a difference in practices when I started the NHL, and going back to my parents’ house wasn’t my exactly a highlight of my year.”

Curiosity overrode his tact and reasoning skills. “You never asked Logan?”

“Non. It was different, with him. He had already left to go to college before I knew him, and spent four years away from his family.”

“Right.” Leo forgot about that on occasion. That Finn and Logan might be five years older than him, but they had only been rookies a year or two prior. Not everyone went straight from their city select team to an official draft. “It’s hard to describe.”

Sirius made an understanding noise, but he couldn’t entirely mask his disappointment. Leo licked his lips and tried again.

“It’s like a piece of you isn’t where it’s supposed to be. And it keeps tugging on your chest, but you never know when it’s going to start and stop so you just… deal with it. You ignore it some days and you think about it other days.” He swallowed around the lump in his throat. “The hard days are when you remember you can’t go back to the way things were before. I don’t even call my mom sometimes, ‘cause I know it’ll make me sadder.”

“The way things were before?”

“Yeah, like—like all my classmates are in college, and I’m laying on a roof with one of the most famous hockey players in the history of forever.” That drew a light laugh from them both. “I’m gonna go back to my reunion in a couple years and have literally nothing in common with the people I used to be friends with.”

“Sometimes I wish I went to college,” Sirius said. “But I would have missed so much if I did. I don’t think I would have been happy there.”

“Finn and Logan get weird about college.” Maybe he shouldn’t be talking about it, but Leo had the feeling none of their conversation would leave the rooftop. “It was hard for them, with all their shit.”

“Re does, too.” He recognized the sad edge in Sirius’ voice; it was the same as his own. “For a different reason. It started good, and ended bad.”

“I’m glad I missed out on that,” Leo said, biting down the urge to scream at the universe for putting their significant others through so much hardship at an already-difficult time. None of them deserved the pain they went through. “Besides, it’s not like we need degrees to play hockey, and we’ll have plenty of money afterward.”

“I never thought about my life after hockey until my ankle.”

“My parents always pushed me to make sure I wanted to do the NHL instead of more school.”

“You’re lucky to have them.”

“I wish you did.”

The words hung suspended between them before Leo could swallow them back down, somehow dangerous and calming at the same time. It wasn’t like he had never thought about it before; he just hadn’t said it out loud. The first time he had seen Sirius’ parents across the rink had given him a case of the heebie-jeebies so strong he had to shower twice. All the times after that just made him angry.

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be.” Sirius’ voice was quiet, but not upset. “You’re not the first person to say it. I’m glad you feel like you can be honest with me.”

Leo frowned. “Well, yeah. Obviously.”

“I try really hard to not be an asshole captain, so it actually does mean a lot.”

“I don’t think you could be an asshole if you tried.”

The barking laugh that split the night startled Leo so bad he nearly jumped out of his skin; Sirius clapped a hand over his mouth, though he was still snickering. “Sorry, sorry, I just—holy shit, I forgot you didn’t know me before. Mon dieu.”

“You weren’t that bad,” Leo protested. “Pots said you used to be grumpier, but that’s it.”

Sirius shook his head, wiping tears of mirth from his eyes. “I was such a dick. There’s not a single picture of the whole team where I’m smiling for about two years and I was such a stickler for the rules.”

Leo gaped at him. “You followed rules?”

“To the fucking letter. It was awful.”

“What happened?”

Sirius shrugged. “I got friends. Idiot friends who did things like showing me the easiest way onto the roof. Pots used to drag me up here every Friday.”

“Really?”

“Ouais.” Mischief flitted over his face. “He skipped date night with Lily once on accident, and she tracked us up here like a bloodhound. It was terrifying.”

“What did you do?” Lily was one of the nicest people Leo knew, but he knew better than to get on her bad side.

“Lied to her face while James hid behind that strobe light.”

“Did it work?”

“Are you kidding?” he snorted. “She called me a liar and suggested getting a better best friend. That was after she told James he’s better have something nice planned for their next date if he ever wanted to get in her pants again.”

“And yet you didn’t listen to her.” Leo tsked. “Of all the people on the team, you chose the hot mess.”

“Trust me, rookie, James had his whole life figured out compared to me.”

“Did you…” Leo trailed off and but his lip. He had pushed his luck a lot already; who knew if one more question would be the tipping point? “Did you ever think about coming out? Even just to Pots.”

Sirius didn’t hesitate. “After every single game.”

“For seven years?”

“Up until the day those pictures were leaked. Even more after Re and I were together.”

“How old were you when you knew?”

“13. You?”

Leo exhaled slowly. “I’m not sure. I think I had an idea of it as a kid, but didn’t really get it until I was in high school. My parents were even more worried about the NHL after I told them.”

“They worry a lot about you.”

“Only child, and I was going for a wildly unstable career path with no guarantee that I would ever see the ice.”

“They’re proud of you. More than you know.” Sirius’ watch beeped. “It’s ten o’clock. Are you supposed to be home?”

“I should probably make sure my boys haven’t burned down the apartment.” Neither of them made an attempt to move. “Can we do this again sometime?”

“Of course.”

You’re like a brother to me, he wanted to say. I don’t know who else I can talk to like this. “Thank you.”

“Any time. We don’t have to do extra practice beforehand, either.”

Leo nudged him gently. “You’re the best captain ever.”

“You’re the best rookie, rookie.”

“I’m not a rookie.”

“Yeah, you are.”

Yeah, I am, he thought as they laid side-by-side in silence once more with the past behind them and the future ahead. And if I end up like you, it means I did something right.

#leo knut #sirius black #coops #oknutzy #finn ohara #logan tremblay #sweater weather #lumosinlove #my fic #fanfic #friendship #cap and rookie

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plus-size-reader · 3 years

Text

Blood pt.4

Stiles Stilinski x Plus size!reader

Word Count: 2589 words

Warnings: none

Summary: The pack finally gets to meet this mystery girl of Stiles’ but that glaring secret of theirs just keeps causing problems.

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

—————————————————————————————————

The table fell silent as you walked up to it, every single one of their attentions poised on you as if you were the most interesting thing they had ever seen in their entire lives.

You hated it.

For obvious reasons, werewolves made you really uncomfortable and as much as you wanted to trust that Stiles knew his friends well enough to know they weren’t going to freak out and rip you apart, you weren’t sure.

You didn’t like them.

Though, as Stiles became more and more aware of the fact that you were dragging your feet, his grasp on your hand tightened to help you remember that you weren’t completely alone.

“I’m going to be here the whole time, just relax” he prompted, hoping that his words were going to be enough to make you feel better about this whole thing while also knowing that wasn’t going to be.

This was something you never wanted to do in your life, but if you wanted to live your life here, you’d have to do it. You had to find out if what he said about them was true, so that you knew that you could stay.

It sucked.

The only thing that made you feel any better about this situation was seeing how well your act had worked on Scott this morning. If you kept it up like that, there was a chance that they would never know what you were at all.

Maybe you could just keep it a secret from them forever.

You had done crazier things.

By the time the two of you made it to the table, the entire group had shared knowing looks, shocked that the tall tale Scott had weaved about what he’d seen this morning wasn’t all one big lie. It just wasn’t something they ever thought would happen.

“Hey, there they are. I was worried you were playing hookie today” Scott grinned, addressing his words to his best friend, who only shrugged at his words.

Not showing up at all today would have been a better idea, all things considered, but you’d have to answer the questions at some point.

It was much better to just get it over with.

“Could you blame me?” Stiles jokes, sitting down beside Scott at the table, taking you with him. You were stiff as you sat down, doing your best to stick in your own little bubble without drawing too much attention to yourself.

Unfortunately, that was basically impossible given the circumstances.

The two of them shared a laugh before Scott addressed a question to you, one that you missed completely because you were still trying to come to terms with the situation you had found yourself in. There was just too much going on at once, and you couldn’t help but be a little overwhelmed.

You weren’t designed for this, after all.

You should have never been afraid of anything, or had to answer to anyone but that had gone out the window when you decided to attach yourself to a teenage boy who was involved with a pack of werewolves.

Just your luck.

“Y/N, honey. You okay?” Stiles hummed, obviously addressing you that way for their benefit. Scott had asked you a point blank question and while he was well aware of what was going on with you, they weren’t.

You had to get a handle on this.

“Yeah, sorry. It’s just a lot at once” you shrugged, plastering that bubbly grin on your face that made you feel as though your cheeks could crack in two at any moment. It wasn't natural for you, but as you had previously decided, it was natural for this girl Stiles was dating.

This girl that you were pretending to be.

“It’s okay. We’re all friends. We’re just a little shocked at the news is all” Scott allowed, smiling at you in a way that was surprisingly genuine. It wasn’t like the werewolves you remembered from all those years ago, that were made up mostly of gnashing teeth and threats of violence.

He didn’t look like he could hurt anything, or anyone, even if he wanted to.

“Stiles didn’t tell you, did he? He can be so goofy sometimes” you laughed, bumping the male in question with your shoulder. The action was surprisingly natural for you, and Stiles reacted naturally as well.

Pretending to be a couple was the easiest part of this whole thing, for both of you.

It was real life that you were struggling with.

“I just didn’t know how” Stiles decided, moving your two hands, that were still interlocked, onto the tabletop. It was a blatant display of the relationship the two of you were supposed to share, but you didn’t mind it.

The more they focused on the show you were putting on, the less they could pay attention to you.

“Come on. Tell us more about it, how did you two meet?” another in the group, a redhead, prompted. She had a cheery demeanor, with eyes that held an intellect that you could have seen shining there a mile away.

She wasn’t a wolf, but she stank like one just like Stiles did, that much you could tell. Of course, she wasn’t human either, but based on what you could get from her alone, you had no clue what sort of creature she was.

“We sort of just ran into each other, and went to get a bite” you shrugged, not even bothering to hide the clever little nod to how you really met within your answer.

If nothing else, knowing something they didn’t made this a little more entertaining.

It was hardly the meet-cute that Lydia had been hoping for, but that didn’t mean she didn’t accept the answer you gave her. After all, it was clear that Stiles really had a thing for you and as long as he liked you, she liked you too.

Contrary to what you would have thought, she wasn’t as tough a critic as Scott seemed to be. He just wanted to figure out what was going on right now,

Stiles had never once had a girl over like that, and every time he’d ever gotten close, Scott knew about it. Sometimes, Stiles stopped talking to a girl to call him in the moment and let him know that he had talked to a cute girl.

He just had to make sure you were legit.

That was literally his whole job as his best friend.

“So, you go to school here Y/N? I don’t think I’ve seen you around here before” he questioned, offering another comforting smile to you which you couldn't help but be a little tired of. Every time you looked at him, all you saw was your coven, torn apart and left for dead.

It was really putting a damper on this whole conversation.

“I used to live here actually, a while ago, and now I’m moving back. I actually enrolled when I got here, but it's been a little difficult getting used to being back” you shrugged, not totally lying this time.

Being around this many people, any number of whom could have walked in on you that day instead of Stiles, was hard to wrap your head around. You were so used to being alone; travelling alone, living alone.

You were always alone.

...But you had to do something, and if you wanted to stick around here for a little while, you knew that you had to build a life for yourself.

“She’s gonna stay with me for a little bit while her folks get settled” he allowed, hoping that at some point, the intense line of questioning would come to an end. Even if you were just a girl he was seeing like they believed, this was a bit much.

He’d never had this many questions for someone Scott was dating.

Though, Stiles knew that it was just his friend's curiosity that was driving him. There is no malicious intent or suspicion behind it, that you would likely want to read into it later when it was just the two of you alone.

This was just how Scott was sometimes.

“Well, it’s good you two have each other then”

You expected more, more questions or pointed looks in your direction but the group seemed content with the backstory they had been given, at least for now. The more direct questions he had, Scott was just going to ask Stiles when they were alone.

It would be easier that way, so that he didn’t make you super uncomfortable.

There was definitely still something about the relationship you two shared that Scott didn’t fully understand but eventually, he came to the same conclusion that Lydia had. It was clear that the two of you liked each other, and for now, that was good enough for him.

It had to be.

After all, he had no reason to assume there was something wrong with you. You had only just met and deciding things like that took time.

“They hate me” you decided, plopping down on Stiles’ bed as if you owned it. On the outside, your meeting them had gone fine but you just had this bad feeling about it. You hadn’t sold it hard enough, or maybe you had sold it too hard.

In any case, it seemed clear to you that they were never going to like you. Just the way Scott looked at you told you everything you needed to know.

They didn’t trust you, and they never would

You were an idiot to think that you would just be accepted here, like you belonged.

“What are you talking about? They loved you. You were great” he hummed, really not seeing where this was coming from. His friends had no reason not to like you, just like his dad was going to have no reason not to like you.

This was all going to be just fine.

All you had to do was trust him.

“I’m not supposed to have to do any of this. I’ve lived lifetimes, and never had to worry about something so trivial” you grumbled, your voice muffled by the pillows and blankets of his bed, which you were still face down on.

You didn’t want to do this, to pretend to be something you weren’t just so that you could live here but now that you were potentially in danger, you had to.

You had to keep this up until Stiles found a way to tell Scott what you really were and even after he did, there was a chance it wouldn't go well and you'd still have to leave. There was just too much that was up in the air for you to relax.

This wasn’t supposed to be like this.

Still, before Stiles could really get a chance to comfort you over the whole thing, your attention snapped up at the sound of a car pulling into the driveway. This time, it wasn’t accompanied by the terrible stench of dog, which meant it wasn’t Scott.

Sheriff Stilinski must have been home.

“Okay, this dinner is going to be a lot easier than at school. You just have to let me handle it” Stiles prompted, sure that you would be able to handle that much. If you could sit at a table full of werewolves, his dad wasn’t going to be a problem.

In fact, he had every confidence that tonight was going to go perfectly because Noah was so easy going.

Stiles was a good kid, he did as he was told and never got into too much trouble, if you didn’t count all the supernatural business. If the most he needed to do was have a girl stay at the house for a while, he doubted his dad would mind.

It wasn’t like he was home too often anyway.

You nodded, not bothering to tell him that you were pretty sure you’d decided to just let him handle everything from now on and stood up, doing your best to keep calm. Though, as it seemed to be doing a lot lately, something went wrong.

You couldn’t have dinner with his dad.

Not only did you not eat, and wouldn’t be eating but as far as food was concerned, you were also starving. You didn’t have to feed super often but with all this stress lately, your system had just blown through the little bit of blood you’d had yesterday.

If you didn’t get something in you soon, it wasn’t going to be pretty.

“Um, Stiles? Did you say dinner?” you clarified, though your comment served more as another gentle reminder that you weren't’ like he was. The male seemed to keep forgetting that you weren’t human like him, and that you couldn’t do the same things.

You had other things you needed to attend to, like the hunger gnawing at your system as you spoke.

“Oh, yeah-okay, change of plans. I’m going to have dinner with my dad and you’re going to stay here and lay low” he suggested, not really liking the idea of leaving you out. However, that was quickly remedied by the fact that you wouldn't have wanted to partake anyway.

As much as you had enjoyed a nice hot meal when you were human, you weren’t anymore and you preferred to get your meals from a different source.

“That sounds great, but what am I supposed to do about my dinner?” you asked, trying to be subtle about what you were going to have to do. There were some things about harboring a vampire in your home that weren’t pretty, and this was one of them.

...but as much as you wanted to, you couldn’t just starve so that he would be more comfortable.

He had to figure something out, or else you would have a repeat of the event that got you here in the first place, and you were pretty sure he didn’t want to deal with that again. You got blood everywhere when you did that.

Besides, keeping you fed was in his best interest, considering you live in very close quarters with him now.

“I’ll take care of it” he promised, pressing a kiss to your forehead and heading out before he could even think about what it was that he’d done. His glaring feelings for you could wait, because he had something much more important to take care of first.

Thankfully, Stiles did have an idea.

If his best friend didn't ask too many questions, there was a way that he could get some blood for you without having to hurt, or even involve, another person. He just had to hope that Scott was willing to help him.

It was really a long shot, at this point.

“Hey Scott, buddy. When you get this message, I need a favor” he prompted, speaking as plainly as he could into his phone and leaving a voicemail for Scott that he could only hope the other male would get and be able to be cool about.

After all, what he was asking wasn’t exactly a normal thing best friends asked of each other, even when one of them was a werewolf.

It was definitely going to come with a few questions.

Stiles just had to hope that would be lucky enough to be able to lie his way out of those. He had been doing that an awful lot lately, but in his defense, he had a promise to keep.

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sunbeams-and-honey · 4 years

Text

Ceres Part 2

Ceres in Aries: They love any physical activity, and often use it as a way to relax. They have a need to be independent and may be prone to self realisations. A lot of them. They need to be physically stimulated often, so they may fidget a lot or naturally snuggle up to people without even knowing that they're doing it. They value sharing experiences with the ones they love above any other type of gift. They find it much easier to show love, rather than to outright say it. They want to help their loved ones to find their independence. They are very protective but hate asking for help. They may have issues surrounding their own self-worth, even though they are the first person to boost the confidence of others. They need to allow themselves to work through their grief, rather than ignoring it.

Ceres in Taurus: Their love language may be touch; they absolutely love to be held and physically comforted by the ones they love. It's vital that their home is a place where they feel safe and loved, and they may like having physical reminders of good experiences in their home, such as having framed photos on the wall. They probably love comfort food, they just need to make sure that this doesn't become a problem. Eating some chocolate when you're sad is all good, but if you're doing it every day, then you should probably look into other ways of comforting yourself. They love to be pampered, even if they try to deny this fact or try to deny themselves this due to self-guilt. Things like massages may seem very appealing to them. They wish to provide financial stability for others, and find comfort through material matters, such as physical gifts. Any issues surrounding their finances will be particularly hard for them due to the comfort money usually gives them. They may be prone to being manipulated and/or manipulating others. It depends on the rest of their chart. They don't like to let go of their grief, which is very unhealthy for their grieving process and wellbeing as a whole.

Ceres in Gemini: They grow when communicating with new people in a positive way, even if they're more introverted than extroverted. It's important for them to be kind or at least civil with more or less everyone they meet. They may find themselves drawn to education, whether that means following higher education, going into the sector as a career, or just constantly having a need to learn new things. Places like libraries or old bookshops may be appealing and comforting to them. They like to talk things through as a form of care for themselves and for others. They may be more comfortable with verbally expressing their love rather than showing it. They love to spend time with the ones they truly love. Their identity may be primarily built of their intellect, so they may have some confidence issues surrounding this. They can't easily deal with rejection. Despite this, they quite literally reject their emotions during times of grief. They need to talk to others in times of hardship.

Ceres in Cancer: They tune into their maternal side and instincts when caring for others, and like to be treated in a similar way. They are very protective of their family and feel like they have a duty to look after them. Remember that this doesn't necessarily mean your biological family. Just like those with Taurus in this placement, it's important that their home is a safe and loving environment. Their home is their special place and should be treated as such. They want to provide this sense of security for their loved ones, and they really do want to care for them. These people often make great parents if they decide to have children. If not, they would at least be quite good with kids. They love to form emotional bonds and connections with others, and this comes very easy to them. However, they might deal with abandonment issues and/or self-esteem issues. They also may have a tendency to cling on to their grief for fear of moving on and forgetting. They need to remember that it's okay to get on with their life; they shouldn't be bound by their grief.

Ceres in Leo: Self-expression and developing their creativity is vital for their self-growth. They have a strong need to be recognised and appreciated and struggle greatly when they feel like they're not loved. Deep down they are a true artist and may be gifted in a certain form of art. Caring for others gives them a huge sense of pride and they might centre their identity around how they do this. They truly want to do their best with their care and are not ones to do this half-heartedly without good reason. They feel loved when they're at the centre of someone else's attention. They thrive on praise from others but they need to learn how to not always rely on this. They need to be able to motivate themselves and this is something they are destined to learn during their lifetime. They are confident in their care but it can lack a sense of empathy. They are good at raising other's confidence, and often do this by recognising the originality of others.

Ceres in Virgo: As most Virgo placements would also imply, anyone with this one probably has some kind of workaholic mentality. They value their work highly and often won't stop until they feel like they're done. They care for other people through discipline, so their way of showing you that they care would be telling you where you're going wrong and why you shouldn't do that. This makes them sound like an overbearing parent or teacher, but they just want to protect you from making bad decisions, and this seems to be the easiest way to do it. They can be harsh when doing this, so they should be told when to rein it in, but they really do care and aren't being mean for the sake of it. They love to help others improve their general skills because they really want them to go far in life. They generally take criticism well because they understand why they're being criticised and know that it will help them in the long run. They love to learn new things, especially in a tactile way. They define themselves based on their achievements, but because of this they can unrealistically high expectations. They go through grief rather quickly, which means that they can overlook what they need to work through. They need to take more time for themselves more often.

Ceres in Libra: These people are highly focused on helping other people, which they often do by expressing their acceptance of their loved ones, and by building a stable relationship with them. They're very good at adapting to the specific needs of specific people, as they understand that everyone is different, and are very observant when it comes to this. It doesn't take them long to work out what a certain person wants/needs. They thrive on communication and stability with a person, and they love to share with them. They also love general intimacy, and this doesn't necessarily mean just sex. They can be selfless to the point of neglecting themselves completely, and this is a hard thing for them to overcome because they base their identity so much through others. They need to learn how to put themselves first and how to separate themselves from other people. Their identity is their own. They are quite open with their emotions so grief isn't as difficult as it could be.

Ceres in Scorpio: People with this placement want to have real connections with the people in their lives. They care for others through any and all kinds of intimacy, and like to be treated in a similar fashion. They don't favour emotional or physical care, tending to combine the two instead. They try to inspire their loved ones to achieve their very best because they think personal transformation is very important. Growth and control are also valued highly with this placement. They prefer to stifle their emotions, so they unknowingly make dealing with grief more difficult for themselves than it could be. They need to learn how to open up more to others.

Ceres in Sagittarius: People with this placement absolutely love to learn and explore, and they need the freedom to do so in order to feel loved. This is how they best grow and thrive. They want to inspire and support the other people in their lives so that they can help them do their best and get through hard times. Their own confidence and optimism helps them greatly with this. They also tend to use their own past experiences and knowledge to help others. They like to build their identity on these things, as well as their beliefs, morals and, to an extent, their loved ones. They have a tendency to avoid grief, preferring to stay strong for other people. That isn't to say that they ignore their grief altogether. They do work through it at some point, it just takes them longer than most.

Ceres in Capricorn: This placement is an indicator that the native holds recognition and achievement in very high esteem. They feel that other people truly care about them when they try to help them achieve their best. Stability is also very important to them and is the main reason why they want to be successful. They're quite big on responsibility and discipline because it's important to them that the people in their lives also achieve success. This focus that they have can mean that they are sometimes too hard on themselves, so they need to understand where to draw the line. They need to learn that their self-worth is not just defined by their achievements in life, and that failure is not necessarily a bad thing. They sometimes feel guilty for dealing with their emotions and grief because they don't think they have the time to work through that side of themselves. They need to learn that this isn't true.

Ceres in Aquarius: These people like to support their loved ones through genuine friendship and by defending them. They loved individuality as a whole and it's vital to them that the people in their life are accepting of one's individuality. They try to make sure that their loved ones feel wanted and respected. They like to be treated in a similar way but they also need a lot of freedom. They need to feel like they're able to breathe. Their role in their community is important to their identity, as well as their connections, originality and creativity. Their politics and what they believe in is also crucial. They may struggle with intimacy and intense emotions because of their tendency to be somewhat of a lone wolf. They're the type of person to have lots of friends but not many close ones. They prefer to detach themselves from their feelings.

Ceres in Pisces: People with this placement are great at understanding and emotionally supporting others. They're selfless to the point of self-sacrifice when it comes to their loved ones, especially to their children. They want to be strong and dependable for others as much as they can. They are sympathetic, compassionate and hugely accepting. They have a large and very alive imagination which needs to be constantly fuelled. They have a tendency to work themselves to the bone so they need to be reminded that they deserve to have a break and be looked after. They sometimes have issues related to their self-worth because they mainly define themselves by how they support others. They constantly feel like they need to be helping someone. Grief can be difficult for them because they feel their emotions so intensely. They are easily overwhelmed by their feelings so they need to learn how to cope in a different way.

#astrology #ceres asteroid #ceres astrology #ceres #aries ceres #taurus ceres #gemini ceres #cancer ceres #leo ceres #virgo ceres #libra ceres #scorpio ceres #capricorn ceres #sagittarius ceres #aquarius ceres #pisces ceres #ceres in the signs #astrology asteroids

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musubiki · 3 years

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Hello, was thinking of making a webtoon and I was wondering if you had any tips for comic creators?

uhfnjd heres some off the top of my head:

- use the process thats easiest for you! i know csp has a lot of comic page settings/presets but tbh for me (right now anyway) its way too complicated and too much work..,.its easier to just use the grid and box tool instead of creating panels with all these layers and uhfjdf no thanks

- not every panel needs backgrounds!! 1 actual background every 4-5 panels (or one per page if youre doing pages) is enough!! just to remind the reader where they are!! otherwise use patterns/colors/etc

- look at other webcomics to see how they handle certain situations!! like if youre wondering “hmm is it weird to use x here? / can i get away with x?” just go look at other comics to see if they do the same!!

- try to make diverse panels!! its okay to do a bunch of face shots, but ive read comics before where literally every panel is just a face shot and its meh LMFAO! try to use different angles, scenes, etc. one of my favorite things to use in panels to break the monoteny is 1) panels with NOTHING but speech bubble(s), 2) panels that show an element of a scene (like outside the window, the sky, the scenery, etc), 3) off-center whatever it is. cut off their face by half the panel. frame it cinematically. 4) weird framing like just the very top of their hair or something

- dont be afraid to make your style look silly/dumb. chibify your characters in funny scenes. make them low-res. not every panel needs to be the mona lisa (in fact you should save all your effort for the high-impact panels)

- on that same note, dont waste time on bad panels!! ive had that feeling before where i wanted a certain panel to look good but it just DOESNT for some reason?? either 1) erase the whole panel, do other things, and return to it a day or two days later to try again, or 2) just leave it. let it be ugly. odds are its not even that ugly, its that your style is honing. i GUARANTEE it looks just as fine as your other panels to your readers (plus theyre gonna spend 2 seconds on it reading the speech bubble and then move on)

- (this is very specific to me, but) backgrounds dont nessecarily need to be super detailed. obvious if the background is the focus of the panel and youre trying to communicate something with it, it should be clear, but otherwise you can get away with just the impression of a street/shop/room/etc!! again, dont waste too much time on things people will spend 2 seconds on!! as long as their brain sees it and goes “room,” youre fine!!

- its ok to choose a style for your comic that makes your life easier. obviously i would LOVE TCWG to be in full color but its just way too much work for me, between colors, shading and backgrounds (especially since its harder to use plain/pattern backgrounds in color comics), so i purposely chose a comic style where i rarely have to shade, and only use the gray spectrum and lots of plain white!!

- make sure you pace yourself!! a lot of my tips are things to streamline the process/make things faster or easier bc i would hate to spend so much time and effort on an episode, and once its finished people are just clamoring for the next one already!! which is sort of the bane of comic creating. i would prefer loosely connected one-shots as opposed to an ongoing storyline, because after finishing a one-shot im like “yeah!! people can enjoy this wholely and i can rest!!” vs. posting a 2-3 parter and after finishing one im like “damn i gotta do the next one soon so we all can sleep easier” and its a lil tiring LOL!!!!! ofc people rarely harass me for the next episode, but it does have a lil pressure when you leave a cliffhanger for over a month LMFAO!! 😭😭😭

ANYWAY THATS ALL I GOT GOOD LUCK!!!

#THESE ARE JUST MY PREFERENCES OFC PICK AND CHOSE WHAT WORKS FOR YOU!!!!#also sorry if theres any typos i type fast and my brain doesnt keep up #or skips ahead

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