#my family is quarantined yet again and this time I feel we might not be so lucky

[kiara-ish]

IDOL SOLDIER

Chapter 1

Words: 5k+

Summary: The world is changing yet again. People are turning into flesh biting monsters and with all backs to the walls, every second is a war between life and death. You expected a lot in life but never in your wildest dreams did you expect to meet Kim Seokjin in the middle of an apocalypse.

Pairing: Enlisted Soldier!Seokjin x fem!Reader

Genre: Dystopia | Romance

Rating: series rating - 18+ | chapter rating - 16+

Series Warnings: blood, gore, violence, mentions of abuse, mentions of sexual harrasment, deaths, graphic descriptions, suggestive themes.

Author's Note: This was initially supposed to be a long oneshot but after scrapping my drafts multiple times, I decided to break it into parts for easy reading and smooth writing too. Also, if I blinded you with that horrible cover, I'm really sorry me and graphics don't go well together. I'll fix it whenever I can.

m.list | next ->

Dystopia always was my favourite trope to write. There was something about hopelessness that always had me taking up the pen. I always supposed it was something rather mundane and humane – to be curious of misery and despair. Until one day when the television that I sometimes left on in the evenings when I felt extraordinarily lonely caught my attention.

"...the rapid growth of the virus Z-24 is shocking. The constant spike in the number of affected is fearsome especially because the medium of transfer is yet to be discovered. What is spreading even more terror is the worsening condition of those infected, they have shown signs of insanity and as the specialists have named it – the zombie syndrome. It is becoming very difficult to reassure the crowd of grieving and worried families outside the hospitals and quarantine. Today, we have with us…"

With the said attention having the span matching that of a goldfish, I was distracted by a ping of notification on my phone and zoned out the news. In hindsight, my listening or not listening to the news wouldn't have made much of a difference. But it might have made me prepare better, it might have allowed me to ponder more on zombie syndrome than Kim Seokjin's nearing end of military service.

Apart from the regulation of wearing masks and sanitizing, there wasn't much havoc about the virus so people took it as seriously as they did coronavirus – scared but reassured that it will be fine sooner or later. So like every other patient citizen, I lost my shit when a lockdown was declared simultaneously with a message from my manager announcing the reduction of the travel allowance because of the change in mode of work.

Going off the texts, my social media was flooded with video clips, hazy, distraught – almost like an illegally filmed video. I knew what they would show but did not want to experience the same fervent panic from the night before. I scrolled past most videos until my clumsy fingers accidentally let go of the phone and in the eager grasp of catching it, a video started playing.

A vlogger was speaking in a broken, hushed voice. His words were unclear nor did I have the motivation to be keener in my observation. He was showing pitch darkness and it intrigued me. So instead of scrolling past like I intended, I stayed and tried to scrutinize the scene but to no help — it was all dark.

"Did you hear that?"

The vlogger's voice was suddenly clearer but his question threw me off. It was unnerving. There was an unfamiliar tremor in his voice that made me feel the same fear as him. The dark screen was suddenly not still and the silhouette of a door came into view.

"The sound came from right outside. Should I open the door to see?"

Of course he shouldn't. There could be found some ten thousand horror movies that would tell him that he should not. But he did anyway. There was no foreboding creek as the door opened, some fragments of street light in the distance that looked more ominous than reassuring. It was still silent, eerily like it was a warm summer evening in the countryside where people had nothing to worry about let alone flesh biting horrors.

"There is nothing here. To appreciate my bravery don't be shy in sending gifts and whatever your heart desires at–"

It was so quick I almost missed it and had I been successful at missing it, maybe my heart would be saved.

It wasn't a grand howl and attack. It was just a blink of darkness moving, covering the lights in the distance with the shadow and as the lights became visible again, it was obvious that something had moved. There was no foreshadowing, ominously sidelining; in a wink there was a rustle of clothes and the clang of the camera falling to the floor. It was pitch darkness but the vlogger had left no stone turned in choosing his recording mic.

As the mic stayed on around his mouth, the squelching of blood resonated loudly as the infected tore his neck probably, its heavy breathing and teeth biting into flesh with a small ripping sound like that of soft muslin. A second too late, the man started gurgling on his blood. He had no time to scream, no chance to run. The gushing of blood as the infected but around until it was done was so loud that I threw my phone away without a care in the world. Yet the only sound that reached me was the low, deep gurgle of blood and the throaty groan of the infected.

No amount of gory movies and books would have prepared me for that video and the silence that rang through the apartment after that prevailed for a very long time with the only noises being my gasps and puking. The clip went viral and everyone went crazy; traffic in the streets for miles as everyone tried to flee the city, flight tickets skyrocketed and the ruckus continued. I couldn't afford the tickets and I had nowhere else to go so I tried to order as much grocery as I could while trying to hold off the anxiety of living through yet another possible pandemic.

More clips started surfacing but I watched none of it, staying off the internet unless it was for work until finally hell couldn't be contained and the internet was shut down in the whole city. The government couldn't do shit for the virus yet so they ensured what they liked best – quiet. Work was close to impossible and salaries were further reduced regardless of the increasing bills.

In all the chaos of possibly a zombie apocalypse in construction and intense inflation, there was bound for things to go wrong — very, very wrong.

--

Ripping off the fabric of a shirt from the backpack, I tied it around the long scratch on my arm. Darkness blurred my vision every time I exhaled and every inhale burned my lungs. Looking around, I realised I had run into the woods, which explained the itchy scratches everywhere on my body. But there was nowhere else to go and if I navigated in the right direction, I would arrive at the isolated military camp, which was a hopeful ray of my survival.

It wasn't supposed to happen; I was supposed to move south to downtown, where there could be a shit ton of infected but more chances of communication too. But the streets looked awfully empty as I walked and sprinted carefully. There were occasional abandoned cars that looked good as new but I did not dare peek in. Last thing I would want was an investigation after all the ruckus clears off, that too for petty theft. The cramp in my stomach was occasionally wrenching my insides but the adrenaline kept me going.

Humans are cute. Hold their hand, caress their scars and give them a warm seat and they'll think they are home. The empty roads, the quiet and the chilly breeze that brushed through my sweaty, filthy skin felt like a cold shower after enduring a heatwave. I got too comfortable so it was only right that I would get plowed to the street.

It was all in a split second. One second I was running and the next a heavy weight crashed to my side, effectively pushing me to the ground and scraping my exposed skin against the rough asphalt. But before I could cry out or even look at the force, there was a putrid stench scorching my nostrils and a growl above me.

There was a squelch of flesh being torn apart and a scream escaped my parched throat, a hoarse but disturbingly loud sound. I felt like I was floating just like I always imagined death to be except something was wrong. There was no pain. I wasn't pathetically thrashing in sheer agony of having my flesh bitten off and the infected person above me was not moving.

Lightheaded, I finally looked, really looked. Blood never looked so relieving. The makeshift spear on my hand was protruding through the neck of the infected and cold blood dripped down the puncture wound. The infected person, what looked like a young man, had his eyes stuck on me but they were vacant of any semblance of life. They were bloodshot and pupils dilated, looking like they would pop out of their sockets any moment. His body weight was crushing me and I couldn't breathe with my already throbbing head.

Pushing off the body, I rolled away, breathing in the open air. But before a complete breath, my body instinctively flipped and with wretched gags that shook my whole body, I puked again. At this point I wasn't sure what I was throwing up, probably my dying organs. The putrid stench was stronger and my gags worsened.

In the midst of that, I heard it this time. Shuffling, wheezing and groaning, footsteps. How did I forget my own scream? How was I not expecting it? My throat hurt and so did my entire body. I wanted to scream and cry with helplessness. But I knew I needed to move. I needed to get the fuck back up.

Because I might not be the main character in the whole story, but I was the main character in mine.

That's how I ended up running in a random direction, then more random directions doing anything to escape the footsteps. Every time I saw the slightest of shifts in my periphery, I changed directions. My makeshift spear remained digging into an infected person's throat and taking out any other knife would take time. I wanted to ram my head into a tree trunk for leaving behind the spear but I had to run then.

At one point, the road was deserted. The woods ran through one side and empty fields through another. There was no house around and nothing objectively obstructive of view. So I stopped but adrenaline was heavy so I stumbled to the ground and rolled on my back. Breathing. Just breathing.

The sky was clear but dusk was approaching. I didn't even want to think what would happen after nightfall so I kept breathing like it was a task. It was so silent that my head got louder again. I was hyper aware of my being, from my aching legs to my throbbing head and sinking heart. I couldn't close my eyes. Every time I gave in to the darkness, I saw a pair of bloodshot protruding eyes first, then a sensation – a cold liquid dripping down my arm and then finally, a knife lodged into a man's throat and the handle of that knife was held by-

I opened my eyes with as much life I had in me to the bright sky, unnerving quiet and my own heavy breathing. There was a nagging thought in my head that I wanted to throttle and bury but it came up again and again. To evade it, I sat up.

I took out a knife from my backpack, knowing that it wouldn't be half as useful as my spear but it was something better than nothing. I held it firmly but did not stand up. I couldn't. My legs were weak and hurt like a bitch. I had always contemplated how quickly things could go wrong but my estimation wasn't even close to what it was happening in reality. I remember basking in the warmth of my airy apartment and listening to music, laughing with my friends on call about how I was finally on the same land as BTS. But then suddenly it was chaos and now I had blood on my hands, filthy but it wasn't my own.

There was a cackling, a giggle around me and goosebumps lined my skin. I looked around for a moment when a realization hit me. It hit me so hard that I began sprinting again. Running towards the woods aimlessly, I ignored the burning of my soles and the scratches of small thin branches tearing my skin. All the while I kept thinking back to that sound.

It was me. I was laughing. I couldn't suppress the thought anymore. I was going insane.

--

Aimlessly wandering through the woods, I finally tried to breathe a little better. Stumbling through the huge trees and trying my best to navigate towards the setting sun, where a military camp should stand tall, I tried to ignore the burning pain that was spreading through my whole body.

The forest wasn't too thick. One couldn't see the other side at one glance but it wasn't complete wilderness. There were some rare trees marked by the government and some sections were fenced with wires. But all the big trees and growing tangled bines yet not one fruit caught my eye. No matter how much the infected scared me and no matter how much my whole body throbbed with a dull ache constantly, I couldn't ignore my cramped stomach and my dry mouth. But I couldn't drop my gait, not before nightfall.

The setting sun was like a halo in the distance and staring at it, as I moved forward, I felt a serenity take over me. There was nothing that was as hopeful as that constant ball of brightness in the desolate quiet of the woods, in a city filled with sick people.

So lost in the blinding light of the sun, I couldn't control my feet as they stepped on a dry branch on the ground and a loud creak echoed through the forest. The echoing felt like nature was mocking me, really laughing at me, pointing and saying, 'look at her, what a dumb bitch.'

Looking around me, I tried to confirm that nothing was going to jump on me at the next second. At least my back wouldn't be to the wall if something did pop up. At most, it would delay my navigation — or that's what I tried to assure myself. I was doing a fine job at it too, taking slow steps further towards the direction of the setting sun until I noticed it.

At some distance, there was a man walking towards my direction. He wasn't stumbling and that gave me hope that it could be another survivor. It couldn't be me all alone. But I didn't want to call out loud and attract attention. So I leaned against a thick tree, away from his sight, just the sound of his footsteps nearing me. The footsteps were steady, not haphazard. They felt conscious and they were closer than ever before.

I held my breath as I heard the footsteps just on the other side of the tree. I could see his shoes standing still. Peeking out a little more, I caught sight of him, looking straight ahead. His side profile looked completely untouched and with his completely fine posture, I was sure by then that he was indeed uninfected. A strange ray of joy sparked through me. He looked very alert and upright, probably because of the sound I made.

So I finally decided to step out from behind the bark. A step and then another until I was beside him. But he still didn't notice me, so I tried to reach out a hand and tap his shoulder. My shaking hands reached out and it was almost at his shoulder blade when I heard his breathing. He was breathing heavily which wasn't abnormal but it was followed by a deep gurgling sound – a growl.

In a beat I was ducking behind the tree again, only in time to catch his head turn in my direction; a knife was sticking out of his other eye, the sight making bile rise to my throat again as a scream threatened to erupt but at the distance he was in, one wrong move and I wouldn't be able to scream ever again. His other eye looked around keenly, heavy breathing and that same eerie gurgling groan as if he was choking on his own blood.

A few moments passed like that with me holding my breath, as he stood motionless. But after what felt like an eternity, he began walking again. Steady footsteps moving past the tree had me finally exhaling. But I couldn't waste any more time, it was already darkening. I had to get somewhere at least.

I took off in a sprint, the desire to put a distance between the infected and myself overwhelming my senses. Ducking below branches and jumping over roots, I let the air rage war on my skin as the surroundings changed to a blur. Even in all that overwhelming stimulation, I could feel it before I saw it. There was someone sprinting behind me. It was not a human. It had a protruding knife from its eye.

I wanted to scream out loud or at least cry in despair. But in lieu of all the mockery I made of characters in dystopian fictions at their obnoxious and unrealistic behaviour, even my mind was working on autopilot and instead of screaming or crying, I pushed my legs to run faster, letting the subdued animalistic urge of survival take over my senses, until I could see nothing but the peeking glimpses of the road at the distance.

My feet met the asphalt again and I let myself blink, feeling the water dripping down my cheeks. I couldn't perceive anything other than my own shoes hitting the road, slowing down with each fall to a jog then a walk and then a standstill.

I looked around the deserted road, panting. My vision was even more blurry than before but I couldn't miss the sight of a military barricade in the distance. This was the path to the military camp, where there should be people that can help me. The sun had dropped below the horizon but the bright halo remained and that too was slowly dimming.

I couldn't brush off the fact that there were probably infected around so I took quick strides to the path opposite the military barricade. A big white arrow was drawn on the road and it made me increase my pace. Soon enough a building came in my sight but it was still far and no matter how much I sped up, it felt far like a mirage.

"Help!"

I stumbled to a stop. There was a looming fear that I was going insane but I was sure I heard someone scream for help. It was coming from the darkening forest. My heart thudded loudly in my chest as I stared at the darkness.

"Help me please!"

I heard it distinct this time and closer than before. There was indeed another person. But I couldn't forget the infected person I encountered before. With the loud shouting from this person asking for help, he would definitely be following the source too. There was a person asking for help and there was an infected person probably tailing the sound.

I've never counted myself as a great person and that wasn't due to humility. I was never a great person. I always prioritized myself first and when the situation had come to a literal man-eating-man situation, I saw nothing wrong in it.

So I sprinted towards the building, ignoring the calls for help, the sound ringing in my ears like a siren.

"Help!"

"Help, please, someone!"

"HELP!"

--

It wasn't a military camp. It didn't look like one at least. It was a huge building, fenced with a huge metal gate, but empty. Deserted. Not one person was around. But I didn't want to lose hope, they could have locked themselves in somewhere.

The gate was open thankfully, so I tried to push myself in through that but ended up opening it slightly wider than before albeit soundlessly. It was dark, the halo of the sun gone. The sky was just minutes away from darkening to a void.

With quiet footsteps I walked towards the only door in sight. It was huge but opened even with a gentle push, no creaking. The place was quiet. With the staircases and the multiple hallways, it looked like the barracks. But no lights were on and nothing was in sight. There was a chill running down my spine as I slowly stepped towards the first hallway to the left.

The long, narrow passage gave way to another big door. The door was closed but through the big glasses on the door, I could well see the inside. I could barely conceal my cry when I saw numerous infected people stumbling around in what looked like the cafeteria. There was food spilled on the ground and they all looked like chefs but a few were wearing military boots too.

My last hope drowned. I could only visualise letting an infected person tear into me. The pain would be immense but it won't last too long. Muffled sobs uncontrollably poured out of me as I stared at the people inside walking around like monsters of the night, waiting for one little sound, then they would tear them down to dust.

I was subconsciously staring at the young soldier who had a huge chunk of his forearm missing. He was young, might have even enlisted recently. His buzz cut looked newly shaped. It made my heart lurch in agony. I couldn't falter the ringing of my ears, the only sound enthralling my eardrums was the cry for help that I ignored. When I closed my eyes to blink I saw a man with a knife sticking out of his throat, a knife that I stabbed him with. It was so terrifying that I wanted to never close my eyes again.

The young soldier's eyes met mine all of a sudden and I took a step back. His eyes remained on mine when I moved further and further back until I began sprinting in the opposite direction. The adrenaline got the best of me and forsaking the sense of directions, I ran up the staircase. The sound of my shoes hitting the floor hurt my own ears. I had no idea where I was running to but I couldn't stop.

Not until I was suddenly pulled back inside a room and thrown against the wall with a heavy body up against me and a hand on my mouth interrupting the scream that I was about to let out. It was dark but I could make out a tall silhouette gently closing the door with one hand while still holding me against the wall.

Tears flowed out my eyes as I heard a familiar groaning right outside the door. Squeezing my eyes shut, I pressed myself to the wall as if it would just suck me in and free me from the wall but the stranger looked unshaken, his hand remained firm on my mouth and eyes on the door. A moment or two passed like that with me holding my breath and a loud drumming of heartbeat in my ears before abnormal footsteps slowly moved past the door and somewhere further down the hall.

The stranger still showed no intent of moving and there were hundreds of thoughts running through me but I let him wait for another minute or so before he moved and let me collapse to the floor like a heap of messy laundry. I couldn't control my trembling body, letting everything over the past weeks finally take their toll on me. I couldn't even look up and catch the stranger step back until he was on the opposite wall where he slid down to the floor too.

"Are you hurt somewhere?"

There was a gentle familiarity in his voice that made my stomach clench uncomfortably. I had no idea how much time had passed since I stopped crying.

"Just some scratches."

He suddenly looked alert and stood up. It took me a few seconds to comprehend his reaction so I was quick to clear the misunderstanding, "Not by the infected people. Just tree branches. I ran through the woods."

There was a sigh heard in the room and I watched his silhouette move to the small window with the blinds down. His shoulders were broad and his physique looked intimidating from my position on the ground but it strangely did not throw me off. There was something about him that felt unnaturally familiar. I didn't know how.

He parted the blinds and let more light flood in before turning to face me. I blinked at him for a moment, my head couldn't process what was going on. The familiar kind eyes, the high nose bridge and the pouty lips were all features of one person I recognised like the back of my hand; someone I had spent years fangirling over. I couldn't mistake that countenance, never. But the only sigh of misery that left me was the consequences I was seeing him in.

I wasn't ready to meet Kim Seokjin in the middle of an apocalypse.

There was utter silence in the room, only our breathing and probably my drumming heart. He had returned to his seat at the opposite wall while I remained fixated to my side. I had so many questions, so many things to say but moving my lips felt like a task. I had nothing on me that would get me going now that the adrenaline had run out. So we remained in an exhausting silence.

"Is the road clear?" he whispered.

"Barely. The woods are not clear so I doubt the road will stay safe too long."

He didn't reply and I couldn't resist the urge so I asked him, "How are you here?"

"I was supposed to be discharged the next day when all this happened. I was in my room packing up when I heard some commotion downstairs."

I didn't need to know what commotions nor did he feel it to be said. Silence prevailed when I couldn't come up with a reply but there was something shifting in me. I was breathing a little easier.

"I'm not going to be here anymore though."

I watched him stand up and move to the bed in the corner and there was a slightly coarse sound of a wrapper being torn, of a small protein bar when it was brought before my eyes. I looked up at Jin who held the bar in front of me, another small water bottle with some water in it.

I was confused. Why was he showing it to me? Was he giving it to me? He couldn't be that stupid. Who would share food and water in this scarcity? I kept staring at the protein bar letting my mouth water and my stomach groan loudly. But I didn't take it from his hand.

It must have been frustrating for him because he suddenly dropped to the floor right in front of me and shoved the bar in my hand and placed the water bottle before me. When my limp hand finally fisted around the bar, he brought my hand to my mouth and shoved it in.

I could have cried as the taste of the melting bar sent a few shudders to my body and I was gobbling it up in less than a few seconds.

"I'm sorry I'm usually more gentle. But I can't be patient right now."

Mouth full with the last bite of the bar, I reached for the water bottle watching him with keen eyes as he continued, "I can only give you this much. I'll leave tomorrow."

The water flowing down my burning throat sent another round of shudders down my body and my eyes closed in bliss. I saved a few sips for later and let the embarrassing sound of my stomach groaning be heard before I processed his words.

"To where? It's hell out there."

"My brothers. They are in the main camp."

I didn't agree with him wholeheartedly but I understood him. The moment my brain registered that it was Kim Seokjin, my mind went to the other six members. The exhaustion had gotten overwhelming and the thought had left me. Hearing it from him was a different feeling. He was the eldest, his sense of responsibility had to be peaking.

I had no idea when I fell asleep but when I woke up it was day again. Lights poured in through the windows with the blinds pushed up. A rustle of fabric made me jump up to a stand still when I remembered I wasn't alone.

Jin was walking around the room, randomly checking drawers and tables. I felt my thoughts to be more organised than last night so I could finally process a lot of things; first being the fact that I wasn't dead or infected yet and I somehow met Kim Seokjin and the second, he is ethereal.

He looked like an angel with the sun beaming on his face, as he looked out. What were the odds of me ending up with him of all people? But before I could further contemplate the odds, he turned to me with a small grimace for a smile but I swooned nonetheless.

"Slept well? You should keep your guards up now. I'll get going."

It all came back to me in an instant. He did talk about leaving to look for the other members and I didn't remember what I replied back.

"Have you been outside? It's hell."

"I know, you've told me before."

"How do you plan to make it there?"

He looked at me with his backpack in hand, "I'm not sure. I don't have much with me, just some scraps for snacks and a bottle of water or two."

I couldn't help the quake of my body when I recalled the infected people I had encountered on my way. At least I had a knife, it looked like he was charging in without anything.

I noticed my own backpack lying abandoned so I picked it up and took out one of the knives from in there.

"There you go," I held it out to him as he continued staring with an unreadable expression, "you will need some kind of protection. I suppose you happen to not have a gun, right?"

He stared at the knife for a moment and I was about to take it back, afraid of his widening eyes but instead he suddenly spoke up, "Guns! There are guns here somewhere-"

"In this room?"

"No, maybe in the gym."

I had no idea what to do with this piece of information so I waited for his mind to continue turning the gears.

"I'm going to try and look for one before I leave."

He didn't wait for any affirmation from my side, immediately moving towards the door when an uncomfortable feeling began sinking in my stomach. He was really leaving like that. Hand on the doorknob, he was about to pull it open when I was pulling his arm back.

Wide eyed he stared as if I had grown two heads, "what are you doing?"

"I'll go with you."

#bts #bts fanfic #bts x reader #bts fic #bts ff #jin ff #jin fic #jin x reader #jin smut #bts jin #kim seokjin x reader #kim seokjin x you #kim seokjin #zombie apocalypse au #zombies #bts kim seokjin #idol soldier #fic: idol soldier #btswritersclub #kiara-ish: idol soldier

[respectthepetty]

Hello. This might seem like a silly question but it's on my mind. What's the deal with the whole "we're talking on a mobile but let's show the characters in the same room" thing. The first time I saw I think it was Gen Y with Mark and Kit even before the whole separation thing. Then it appeared in MSP. And now in A Boss and a babe. And I'm sure I've seen it somewhere else but I can't recall now. To be honest I don't know if I like it or I hate it but for some reason it's nagging at me that it seemed like it came out if nowhere. Again sorry if it's a silly thing .

Also, love your blog, love the color commentary and I too think it's all on purpose and meaningful.

Hiya, Anon! Thanks for the appreciation! Also, I've written this before, but let me repeat it here - There are no silly questions on Tumblr! People created an entire fake movie, and somehow the BL folks convinced others that KinnPorsche was the Thai remake of it.

Now to your not-a-silly question! First, let me list the shows from the past few years that I can remember doing what you are writing about:

I don't file this in my mind's storage room, so if I miss any, someone shout it out.

See You After Quarantine? - Sato x Bo Chun

Hello, Stranger - Mico x Xavier

Gen Y - Mark x Kit

Fish Upon the Sky - Mork x Pi

GAP - Sam x Mon

HIStory 5: Love in the Future - Hai Yi x Johnny

My School President - Tinn x Gun

A Boss & A Babe - Gun x Cher

Bed Friend - King x Uea

I'm going to make an educated guess.

Looking at the timeline, this didn't come out of nowhere, but came out of necessity - a pandemic!

Gameboys - Gav x Cairo

There was a two-year+ period where many of the globe couldn't touch their loved one. The only way to "see" some family was through calls, so I think directors are making a conscious choice to show people in the same space after many years of that not being a realistic possibility.

I'm sure this technique has been used before 2019, but I think it's more of a sentimental choice to reinforce the narrative - people want to be around their loved ones. Technology is great, but it doesn't replace the feel of people sharing the same space and after having to deal with that for the past few years, we want to see people sharing the same space even if they aren't.

I, personally, like it. In HIStory 5: Love in the Future, Hai Yi was in mandatory quarantine when he spoke to Johnny on the phone, and they had several scenes on the phone where they would appear in the same room, yet when Johnny finally saw Hai Yi in person, he was left in awe.

Both were instantly attracted to each other, and it was believable because even though they were just talking on the phone, we saw them interacting.

Another educated guess is these shows are telling us that meeting and talking through the use of technology doesn't dilute the connection between the two people, but makes it stronger. The physical aspect is pushed aside and the emotional connection is front-and-center. King in Bed Friend is showing Uea that he doesn't just want his body, but he wants his presence. Mork in Fish Upon the Sky wanted Pi to know that he had always valued him as a person regardless of how Pi felt about himself. In Hello Stranger, Xavier and Mico would have NEVER gotten to know each other the way they did without the help of technology. Who knows how @dribs-and-drabbles and I would interact in real life, but in these tags, I'm trying my damndest to get in an ethical non-monogamous situationship, and know that my mama didn't raise no quitter.

TLDR: Technology brings people together, and putting them in the same room reinforces that.

#Gameboys #Hello Stranger #See you after quarantine? #history 5: love in the future #bed friend #my school president #a boss and a babe #fish upon the sky #gen y the series #GAP the series #making connections with technology #sharing the same space even when they aren't #waiting for daddy to slide into my DMs but apparently I gotta make the first move

[sacrificethemtothesquid]

Family has descended upon us, so my usual routine is shot to hell, but at the very least I have a 7am tea watching the sunrise. This morning is blissfully clear and cold, and high in the sky is an airplane contrail the color of a mandarin orange, dripping down the blue in a thick, bright stripe. 

MIL is dying today. She might even be already gone - she was still hanging on when everyone came home from the memory care place, but maybe she decided it was time to go when things finally went quiet. Maybe we haven’t gotten a call yet. Maybe FIL got the call and decided not to call us. Maybe she’s still there: Schroedinger’s mother-in-law.

There are six people in this house that usually only holds two, but for all the people, it’s weirdly quiet. Even when there’s talking, no one is talking. There are no funeral plans, no discussion of cremation or burial, none of the busy-ness that I want to be happening. When Dad died, it was unexpected. We thought we could save him right up until the last few hours. Husbandthing’s mom has dementia. She’s been declining for years. We knew this would happen, but the conversations that I want to happen, the conversations I think need to happen, aren’t.

I keep thinking of deathwatch beetles. It’s too quiet here but it feels too heavy to make noise. We’re here looking through old photos instead of by MIL’s side, which is a choice that wasn’t mine to make. She isn’t my mother and it isn’t my place to step in. 

I cried on the phone to my mom last night: everything reminds me of Dad. I don’t want this to be about my own grief. I don’t want to make this about me. I just want to be a good support to my husband and the family I married into, but everything reminds me of Dad and it’s so fucking hard. She cried back: I’m making you a pot roast. I’m making you cookies. I’m here. I understand. I love you.

His family is different from mine. There are schisms and breaks, jagged lines in a complicated family tree. When Dad was dying, the nurses ignored quarantine rules to sneak my sister and me into his room so we could sit with him and Mom. We made a ring around him, holding each other’s hands and counting his heartbeats. My mother-in-law’s place has no restrictions, but when FIL saw my sister-in-law sitting by the bed, he turned around and left. Maybe he came back later. He should be there with her, my mom said. He knew her longest.

Should is a word my family uses a lot, but right now, I’m the daughter-in-law. It’s not my place to make decisions, nor to pass judgment. I’m biting my tongue bloody and blathering here instead. I’m sitting in a silent house thinking about beetles, making tea over and over and over again. Husbandthing brought sandwiches to the hospital when Dad died. I made soup yesterday. We picked my niece and nephew up from the airport, the same terminal where we picked up my sister last year. She’s going to need her big sister, Husbandthing said then. It was a reminder I needed, and I keep repeating to myself now, he needs his wife. They need a sister-in-law. He needs his daughter-in-law.

We’re going to take a break and see my mom today. It’s a long drive into the woods, and my sister-in-law has never met my mother. It feels awful to be taking Husbandthing’s family away from his own mom, but they want the break. They want sandwiches. They want to make a connection that circumstances over twelve years haven’t let them form. I’m going to cry, Mom said. If you cry, I’ll cry, I said. Let’s be strong together. 

#death tw #random blather

[samanthaswishes]

Agents of SHIELD Rewatch Season 2B (ep. 11-22)

It's been months, but the rewatches are back!

Here's my commentary on my rewatch of Agents of SHIELD Season 2 Episodes 11-22. This may not be the best commentary since these are just the thoughts and opinions that come to my mind as I watch the episodes rather than a full-blown analysis, but I'm just having fun with it!

2x11 Aftershocks

This is also the first set of rewatches on Disney+, and you can't skip the recaps, so I get to watch Trip crumble to pieces TWICE in one episode. Making me cry this weekend, why don't you.

Baby Gordon! Also, this flashback scene takes place in 1983, which means it's probably not that long before Kora dies. It's crazy to look back on this scene after s7, knowing that Kora currently exists in that flashback.

Also, JIAYING!! She's still one of my favorite characters.

I want Jiaying to hug me and comfort me and tell me everything is going to be alright.

"They would be lost" as it cuts to Skye😭

AND THERE'S the second Trip crumbling of the day.

Skye... why are you wearing shoes in bed?

Just gonna say this now, Chloe's performance in this episode is *chef's kiss*

I remember watching this episode for the first time and just being absolutely devastated we didn't have Trip anymore. I'm still devastated.

Dr. List and Von Strucker mention.

So, why was Raina going on a killing spree in the temple?

I JUST WANNA HUG SKYE🥺

Also, I miss big sister Bobbi with the quarantine survival kit.

"I think you're a rockstar"🥺

"Come home, Jemma" I love this family.

Skye's heart monitor is literally going off the rails, signifying that her heart rate is dangerously high, yet no one heard or noticed?

"Smile!"😃

The plan for Bakshi to "escape" is both ridiculous and hilarious.

"ThEy'Ll NeVeR tAkE uS aLiVe!"

Okay, but what would have May's version of the plan been like?

Also Bobbi just casually wheeling her motorcycle out.

Okay, I understand where Jemma is coming from and her fears surrounding it, but I feel like she shouldn't have blown up in front of Skye, who was affected by all of this. Again, I totally understand Jemma's reaction, I just feel like talking about this as an epidemic and something dangerous isn't something to be said in front of someone who is affected.

Ooh, Raina, don't call his daughter a bitch.

Cal's little happy dance😂

It's sad hearing Cal talk about his plan, knowing what we know about Jiaying later.

"I can't live like this" "Then don't" Damn, this got dark quick, and it's just gonna get darker.

Props to Ruth Negga for putting on amazing performances while having to deal with all those thorns.

Hunter is a better spy than the show gave him credit for. Sure, he's made pretty shitty choices, but he's pretty good at the job. He was suspicious of Bobbi and Mack the whole time.

Also, the only part that makes this season hard to watch is the whole 'Real Shield' thing and the way Bobbi and Mack are around the team, which sucks cause I love Mack and Bobbi. They're literally my favorite characters after Daisy and May.

Oh Mack, you do so much more than just 'working on Lola one day'.

Again, talking about putting Raina down in front of Skye? I understand Jemma, but there are just some things you shouldn't talk about in front of someone who was just traumatized due to the same experience as said person you want to put down.

Did anyone else notice that the music Skye is listening to on headphones is the same score used during the Ghost Rider pod in season 4?

300bpm, that's 5 beats per second. For reference, my resting heart rate at this current moment is 90bpm, which is 1.5 beats per second. Skye's heart rate at the time of the collapse was roughly 3.33 times faster than my current heart rate.

"That's inhuman" we love to see it.

Again, can we not tell Skye that something's wrong with her?

I made a post about this a while ago, but besides the fact that her powers may have just been exposed, Skye might have been nervous about the broken glass because of what happened with the crystal decanter she broke at a foster home, which she mentions in like 6 episodes.

Also, I love these soft May moments. The way she goes from comforting Skye to freaking out in a protective manner over the fact that she's bleeding.

The way Trip's mom just knew😭

If you follow me, you know my opinions on Fitz and my disdain for him, and I don't agree with the fact that Fitz kept telling Skye to hide her powers as she could have gotten help sooner, but "You're just different now, and there's nothing wrong with that" will forever be one of my favorite lines from the show.

Raina, baby, no :(

"COME ON, GIRL"😭

Why couldn't we have more family moments like the end of this episode?

2x12 Who You Really Are

Welcome back, Lady Sif! I loved seeing her in Loki, and I really hope we get her back in Thor: Love and Thunder (was it ever confirmed that she was going to be in it? I can't remember).

The May and Skye sparring scene... *chef's kiss*

"I didn't want to hurt you" and then May's gesture that's just like "You think you can?"😂

Also, THAT transition

"Son of Coul"

In canon, how did they get that picture during 1x15?😅

Why did they have to make the Kree's weapon look like a mallet you would beat meat with? lol.

So, now the ICERs are dangerous? I don't remember them saying dangerous for some reason, and now I feel for Skye with the after-effects after she shoots herself later in the episode.

"I can" Love that May is crushing on Thor. And just Coulson's face after she says that haha.

"i BaReLy ToUcHeD iT"

"I learned this as a child, did you not?"

Agents of SPOOF has forever ruined the scene where they find the Kree cause I can no longer watch this scene without the song "Blue" going through my head.

I love the parallel they make in s7 of Kora's gun quaking apart to Skye's in this episode, even if Kora wasn't the one causing the quakes.

I love how Sif was about to explain the concept of a key to Coulson.

Yes, Mack is a pretty boy.

The zoom in on the water glass. The way water glasses have become something of a symbol for Daisy's powers!

The way May just knew the shaking was from Skye and that something was up all along.

Love how May and Coulson don't even think twice about grabbing Skye and standing in front of her.

Why Bambino for the name of the "I know what it does" weapon?😂

Mack just goes from "we'll decide what she is😠" to "Tremors🤩" and I love that.

May grabbed her and ran, and then she took a knee and got on Skye's level, just as a special someone had once told her to do🥺

No one talks about the May and Daisy scene in this episode enough. Just the way May says "Skye" tells you everything about their relationship and how much they care.

It's there for a split second, but the way May just softly touches Skye and moves her hair😩 (I'm obviously touched starved, can't you tell? lol)

Ugh, I always hate that line from Mack given his and Daisy's amazing relationship later. You can see the regret on his face when he sees her though. Ugh, can we just move on from the painful parts, please?

2x13 One of Us

"I'm stopping them before they start" Oh, Skye, baby. If only you knew what you were doing to yourself.

May's thoughts: "Is he really asking me to contact my ex right now?"

And there he is, Dr. Andrew Garner, the husband blueprint.

Also, Andrew is a great therapist, laying down the rules for treating Skye.

Love that Lian May still likes Andrew and invites him over for dinner despite her daughter having been divorced from him for years. I mean, I would too.

This is an Andrew Garner appreciation blog.

Here's one of the one-liners we get of Daisy's past in the foster system. Never will forgive the writers for just forgetting this major part of Daisy and having the characters treat her like she didn't have this trauma as well.

Also love how even Andrew grew a soft spot for Skye/Daisy as time went on.

"I'm not suicidal" UGHHHHH SEASON 2 WHY YOU GOTTA DO ME LIKE THIS. SEASON 4 IS COMING UGHHHHHH. Glad they care for her this season. You will hear from me more on this when we get to s4a cause I have A LOT to say about how they treated Daisy.

Did we ever establish EXACTLY was the photo on Andrew's desk?

Love how we found out that May can't cook and just ran with it in fanfics😅

Fitzsimmons gossiping about May and Andrew is such a mood.

"You need backup" "I need backup"

That kid filming with his iPhone is the only realistic thing in this show.

NOT THE BIRDS

Mack, imma have to disagree with you on that. I actually like pineapple on pizza.

As much as I absolutely love the 'May and Coulson are Daisy's adoptive parents' fics, where are all the 'May and Andrew are Daisy's adoptive parents' fics? Cause the way Skye talked to them, convincing them to let her go, just gave me 'daughter talking to her parents' vibes.

Skye's shaking can be because she's scared and it works, but given that you can see everyone's breath, it was probably, no doubt, freezing cold when they filmed the football field fight.

I totally forgot Bobbi was hiding under the bleachers. That made me laugh😂

THAT👏🏼 MAY👏🏼 POWER👏🏼 WALK👏🏼

Again, I JUST WANT TO HOLD BABY SKYE. She's over here watching the people she cares about the most destroy people who are gifted just like her.

Can we talk about the May and Coulson Worried Parent™ running?

"We're as close to a family as Skye has"🥺

2x14 Love in the Time of Hydra

You know, I really liked this stretch of episodes without Ward. Now, he's back. Gross.

I also just feel really bad for Kara

Look at that, the only time the MCU actually might have looked at Bruce's mental health and how he might actually not want the Hulk. Did we all just forget about how he said he tried to kill himself in The Avengers?

Not Fitz talking about being glad that certain people don't have choices the better themselves.

Watching May and Coulson talk about taking Skye out of the picture so she can better control her powers, knowing that something is up with Bobbi and Mack, is really neat. They were always thinking ahead.

"Off to see the wizard"

There are so many parts of this episode, I honestly have no idea what's going on lol.

The team canonically had karaoke nights.

The whole 'Real Shield' thing is so frustrating. Like, I understand some aspects of what they are saying, even Coulson later agreed, but their execution is just terrible.

Wait, so Jemma knew that there were going to be repercussions of the casts she made for Skye?

Thinking about all the flashbacks Skye was having when Coulson told her to "pack a bag"🥺 You can just see it in the way her face totally drops and the shaky breath she takes.

LOLA BACKSTORY

I will never get over May's voice coming out of Skye's mouth. This whole scene is just weird and creepy😣

I'm just tired of Ward justifying everything he's done wrong on his past when Daisy had gone through a rough upbringing as well, and she came out the most selfless person ever. She didn't become a little murderer.

"You seem so well adjusted" EXCUSE ME. DID YOU JUST SAY THAT ABOUT WARD???

Not gonna lie, Ward and Kara breaking into Talbot's base does make me laugh. It's just so chaotic.

Talbot's soldiers have to go through so much haha😅

"If there is one thing I cannot stand, it is a spy in my house" and the cut to Mack OMG.

Does Mack really think he can outsmart THE Melinda May?

Kara punching Bakshi was very satisfying.

At the time of rewatching this episode, I had rewatched (again) all of season 1 and prior episodes of season 2 (just so it says I watched them on Disney+), but I never noticed in 2x02 how Coulson told Hunter that there were people he trusted that vouched for him and that 'people' was Bobbi.

"I'm just trying to fix her!" UGHHH THIS LINE HURTS EVERY TIME. SIMMONS WHY? I LOVE YOU BUT THE XENOPHOBIA HURTSSS.

Not the edible arrangements😂

Again, feel so sorry for Kara.

2x15 One Door Opens

THE WAY BOBBI BUSTS THROUGH THE DOORS. YES QUEENNN!

I wish we got more Hartley before she died.

"The path we've chosen, makes you forget your lines sometimes" is one of my favorite bloopers.

Gotta hand it to Coulson's quick thinking.

Love how Bobbi knew it was safer to just break through glass than to voluntarily fight May.

Also, May and Bobbi fight... *chef's kiss*

When did Bobbi and/or Mack have the time to put a monitor in a fire extinguisher that's out in the open?

I don't understand the logistics of the casts. Like, I know it suppresses the powers, but like, what makes it so Skye feels woozy? Like, that should have been something to note.

As someone who hates horror movies, the very not-that-scary horror-esc scene/buildup did kinda scare me the first time I watched haha.

If I opened my front door, and some guy like Gordan was standing there, I would have screamed and shut the door right then and there.

Gordan is aware of exactly who Skye is, right? I wonder if he knew her during the few months before Whitehall. I mean, he had known Jiaying since at least 1983, and she wasn't born until 1988.

Also, I wonder if Gordan ever thought about Kora during those moments with Skye, a girl who was scared of herself and didn't have an idea of how to control her abilities.

SMART GIRL JEMMAAAA

They don't want secrets, but they're willing to break into a base, potentially hurting a lot of people? Again, Real Shield frustrates me.

Skye discovering new aspects of her powers will always be my favorite part of the episode.

Fitz and Simmons holding hands and being there for each other after Real Shield invades is sweet.

And people don't understand why Skye wanted to stay at Afterlife more than Shield. May wasn't able to finish, so Skye believed all of Shield was after her. Then, of course, she was chased through the woods and shot at.

May is the dictionary picture of loyalty.

Why is Coulson being sent down that elevator so funny?😅

Damn, I really hate Calderon.

Again, Skye only attacked to protect herself. SHIELD ATTACKED FIRST.

Love how much Bobbi still cares about Skye. The scream of her name was pure terror for her.

And there's the quake shield! Shame we only see her use her powers like that again in the series finale.

So, does Skye just not remember arriving at Afterlife? Did she like pass out as soon as she and Gordon got there?

2x16 Afterlife

Thank you Coulson for icing that guy cause that actor (the car salesman) is a pedophile (I know this cause he was the dad/grandfather on Andi Mack and they had to cut him out of the show)

What was the point of having Skye in two pieces of cloth?

And there's Mr. Battery Pack Lincoln Campbell.

Thank you Bobbi for defending Skye.

How would you have been invited IF COULSON DIDN'T KNOW ABOUT YOU?

So Jemma and Fitz made their plan pretty early on given that Jemma didn't have much of a reaction about Fitz "packing his things"

"I lost her"😭

The little foreshadowing to the following episode with Bahrain!

Hunter waking up like that is a mood.

Hunter is a whole mood this whole episode actually.

So, those shield agents were there with the battering ram for an hour? I'd give up after like five minutes.

After season 3, I know that Daisy and Lincoln weren't ready for the relationship they could have had at the time, but I will admit that they're cute. He's the one who convinced her that her powers could be a good thing. It's nice to see someone caring about her.

You mention Trip, and I will start crying.

MIKE PETERSON!!!!!!!

AND THERE'S JIAYING

Skye knows there's a connection between her and Jiaying.

Is Lincoln aware of the relationship?

That scene hurt knowing that Jiaying lost Daisy, but watching this after s7 and knowing she's also hurting because of Kora, it hurts even more. UGHHHH WHY DOES THIS SHOW MAKE ME FEEL FEELINGS.

Hunter just wants to go to Mexico.

2x17 Melinda

May and Andrew were such a good-looking couple.

THEY WANTED TO HAVE A FAMILY AND HAVE KIDSSS😭😭

"Best Security System in the World" yes she is.

Thinking about how Coulson wanted to bring May onto the Avengers Initiative with him.

Okay, but how cool/emotional/sad would it have been if we got a young Eva Belyakov in season 7 when they went to Afterlife?

The fact that Skye is still trying to justify SHIELD and blame herself when Jiaying is trying to make her see that she had every right to fire back IN DEFENSE. And people wonder why Skye """turned""" on SHIELD.

The Quake theme when she causes the avalanche. Ugh, I will never not get emotional when I hear that theme.

May's smile when she first sees Katya😭 WHY DOES THIS EPISODE HAVE TO HURT!!

I really feel bad for Raina.

The water glasses is making me season 7 emotional. (7x10, why did you have to be so sad???)

Another reason I love this episode aside from the Bahrain backstory is that it actually touches upon Daisy's trauma with foster care and abandonment and actually acknowledges what it has done to her character instead of ignoring it and treating her like shit.

"I tried some of the scotch too."

*26 Skye. You're 26. (Though Chloe I'm pretty sure was only 22 or 23 when filming this episode)

JIAYING KNOWS YOUR BIRTHDAY SKYE!!!

"You were born on July 2nd." And I'm going to go cry now.

Dichen and Chloe's acting and emotion in this scene is just phenomenal!!

"I was too afraid to hope"

Why did the universe allow people to hurt Jiaying and Daisy?

"Shield is not authorized for any action" *one second later* "Go"

"Bio always works" foreshadowing for 4x14!

The whole "Get down on her level or grab her and run like hell" scene is so heartwarming and heartbreaking at the same time, and seeing this happen in 2x12, ugh I really love this show.

"Do good Melinda, but come home"

I know I haven't said too much on the Bahrain flashback, but I'm just so invested in it. Seeing the famous backstory of May come to fruition... it's all so amazing and painful all at the same time.

I always have and always will love May, and I understand May being upset that Coulson was keeping secrets from her, like seeing Andrew for counseling about the alien writing, but I feel like she was a little too harsh with him given the secrets she kept from him last season. I know that was for his own protection, but still. Again, I still feel like May has every right to be upset. Just the way she went about it just felt like an uncalled for reverse of last season. Just my opinion.

Were they trying to have some sort of romance thing between Gordan and Raina? I don't know... the whole "I can take you to amazing places" just gave me that vibe.

The connection between Jiaying and Bahrain is so chilling every single time.

AND THE KATYA REVEAL. There are so many moments from the show I want to watch for the first time again, and that is one of them. The realization for the audience and both May on what has to be done. Again, CHILLING.

I'm a more casual Philinda shipper, but I still love their friendship so much. The way Coulson ignored the Bahrainian forces and pushed past them when he heard the gunshot and went in for May. You can just see that friendship so clearly.

THE IMAGE OF MAY JUST CRADLING KATYA😭

"The Calvary went in after all"

"Let the girl go" CRYING

If I'm remembering correctly, Daisy must have been AT LEAST over six months old when she was dropped off at the orphanage. I'm pretty sure she was more. A six month old is very different from a newborn baby. How did they mess up her age by A WHOLE YEAR??

"He is a monster" "He was good once" THE FACT THAT THIS ALSO APPLIES TO JIAYING!! I feel so bad for her. Jiaying deserved better.

AND RAINA IS THE TRUE CLAIRVOYANT *cue the That's So Raina clip from Agents of SPOOF*

Way to go, Hunter. You've made it to Mexico!

I don't think I said this last episode, but I loved the Coulson-Hunter teamup.

2x18 Frenemy of My Enemy

The way Hunter is just avoiding eye contact with Fitz when Ward is mentioned lol.

Sad watching Cal like this, knowing Jiaying wants to send him away.

Again, was Lincoln aware of the relationship between Skye and Jiaying prior to this?

The Bobbi and Mack sparring scene is pretty cool too.

The "Simmons, what did you do" had May giving a hard Mom Face™

"Hey, baby😏" "Hey, sweetie😃"

That little interaction between Kara and Mike is so funny to me for some reason.

The whole Coulson wanting to use TAHITI on Ward still confuses me. Like yeah, Ward won't remember he was bad, but what about him being wanted?? Did Coulson have a plan for that?

I understand Jiaying has reservations against Raina, and rightfully so, cause of what she knows from Cal and Skye, but it still rubs me weird that she is questioning the existence of her gift knowing that anyone can be the first of their kind like Gordon.

From this point forward, the rest of the points are written like a month later cause school sucks, but it’s summer vacation now, so I have time finally!

So have Kara and Ward just been planning revenge on Bobbi for like a while or something?

So have Kara and Ward just been planning revenge on Bobbi for like a while or something?

Yes, Ward. That house is your last.

We love Mike cock-blocking them cause... gross.

“Gordo"

I love Cal. Just want to say that again.

I want more of Cal and Jiaying's love story. But then again, it'll probably make the whole thing even more sad than it already is and make me cry even harder.

Also funny how Skye was going to be brought up in the same state Coulson was born in.

“And I empathize" IF THIS DOESN'T EXPLAIN DAISY'S WHOLE CHARACTER I DON'T KNOW WHAT DOES.

SHUT THE FUCK UP WARD

I sort of kinda like Fitz and Simmons relationship in these later episodes of season 2 and the trust they are willing to put into each other.

JIAYING WANTED TO BE A DOCTOR😭

Cal wanted Skye to go to a charter school. Fun fact: I attended a charter school. Honestly, don't know what makes a chater school a charter school, but to me, my school was if you mixed a private school and public school and it was K-12. We wore uniforms, but there wasn't a tuition and it was opened to the public. You just had to be put onto a waiting list and you got in by lottery. I got in in 5th grade and graduated high school from there in 2019.

This scene reminds me of the Pirates of the Caribbean scene for some reason.

So, no one saw Mike's gun come out and go back in?

Cal complaining about capitalism is a mood.

“I'm kidding... sort of" about the liquor.

Skye's pickpocketing skills!!!!

Skye got the neopolatin ice cream sandwich. Love that for her.

See Lincoln, you could be a spy.

Hunter referring quantum entaglement as torture has the same energy as Scott Lang thinking of quantum entaglement as something sexual.

DAISY JOHNSON DAISY JOHNSON DAISY JOHNSON

And the soft Quake theme when she says her name for the very first time😭

The hula dancer🥺

I find it weird that Cal wanted to show the tools used to put Jiaying together. It might just be me, but I would be creeped out.

EVERYONE COMING TOGETHER!!!

Does Lincoln have any previous fighting experience? Cause he acts fast and knows what to do with his powers.

Also, despite everything, Skye still has faith in SHIELD and knows its Hydra.

It's cliche, but Skye falling on top of Lincoln is kinda cute.

Lincoln's face of recognition when trying to eletrocute Mike😂

“Sure, and I'm the Hulk"

Ward is still obsessed with Skye if he willingly followed Coulson like that.

I'd be a little pissed if I saw someone I trusted with Ward too, not gonna lie.

The way Skye was going to reunite with Coulson before Gordon got her🥺

SHIELD was that slow to get there?

Take me to your leader"

2x19 The Dirty Half Dozen

Excited for this one. One of my favorite episodes from this season.

Jiaying has such a maternal feel to her, which I love, but I always find it funny when she comforts Raina knowing that Ruth Negga is actually older than Dichen Lachman (only by like a month though).

I understand Jiaying's anger towards Cal after he revealed Skye's identity and relation to her when she had wanted that hidden.

Were there always those bright lights in the Cage? Cause it was always dark in there.

“I like seeing my Bus" I just remembered this is the last episode with the Bus, which continues to be my favorite SHIELD base/aircraft.

User-Friendly Cal™

I totally understand Jiaying's fears, but there are also the "never leave a man behind" values that Skye has.

So Mike and Lincoln are in the same cells that Wanda and Pietro were in, right? At least the same facility.

Love Mike's sarcasm.

Having to say "Hail Hydra" after every phone call must be annoying.

“Dazzled"

Coulson translation: "I'm taking my og team cause I love them and they're mine. Except for Ward, he's more of an inconvenience, but I need to use him"

There are windows other than the cockpit of the quinjet?

Don't worry Hunter, I'd be nauseous looking at Ward and Kara together.

Can May beat the shit out of Ward again? Please.

My Team™

I realized I haven't said much about Gonzalez. Is there even much to say?

I don't know if Coulson really had to tell May about seeing Andrew. Yeah, it hits a more personal nerve, I get that, and May can be upset, but I understand Coulson not wanting to discuss his own medical records.

Don't like Gonzalez saying the agents going on the mission are worth the risk, saying that they are more expendable than Bobbi. Bobbi's not expendable either, but I think you get what I'm saying.

THE OGs!

Jemma's first question being "Are you making friends?"🥺

I love the entire team death staring Ward.

“I'm still happy I shot you" ME TOO.

Jemma, Fitz, AND MAY agreeing with Skye is a whole mood.

“Ward, just no more talking to people" Yes, please shut him up.

That little comment about needles was all Kara needed from Bobbi.

Thinking about how they all had to pack their belongings from the Bus aka Skye's first real home.

And goodbye Bus. You were a great part of the show, and I will forever miss you.

“Really starting to wish I hadn't eaten that Hot Pocket earlier" is such a random line and I love it.

Also thinking about all the chaos the cast had while filming this scene. Between Chloe and Clark with the fart machine and Brett doing a little too much when they were "falling", I just love these cast moments.

Also an appreciation for Ponytail May.

Ward's confusion with Skye's powers will always be funny to me though.

“So that's what happened in Puerto Rico."

I also always think about how StaticQuake was a little interesting and weird for Chloe as she has a younger brother who is actually named Lincoln.

Ward's confusion and sass are enjoyable in this episode. A little. Only a little. Like a smidge.

ALSO THE ONE-SHOT FIGHT!!!

Chloe deserves all the recognition for that fight scene, especially since she broke her arm during it.

“Either come with me now or you're next" "Okay, after you" Always listen to Melinda May.

Bobbi and Mack's happiness when the mission is a success is nice though.

MARIA I LOVE YOU

Episodes like this make me wish I had watched the show when it was live.

2x20 Scars

KEONIGS!!!!!!

Call your sister" sticky note, LT FORESHADOWING

Glad to know SHIELD was the "friends" mentioned in Age of Ultron. I guess that's the only time the movies ever mentioned the show.

Thank you Bobbi for defending Coulson

Also, like how Coulson was able to see some of the errors that 'Real SHIELD' was right about.

Skye staying with Lincoln is giving major Sousa staying with Daisy vibes.

I wonder if the man's son Raina talked about eventually did go through the mist. I mean, he must have if Raina saw it. I'm just wondering when.

Oh yeah, this is the episode that introduced the monolith, that damn thing.

Okay, but why did SHIELD decide to keep the monolith from Hydra instead of, you know, destroying it.

People always are harsh towards Skye for siding with the inhumans for a bit there and uses it as an excuse to hate on her, but the way May and Coulson are already taking about the inhumans, asking "are they people" could give Skye the impression of what they may view her as. They kinda throw away her connection to the people and not listen to her when she tries to explain why she trusts them. Honestly, Skye has no reason to trust SHIELD right now as they chased her through the woods not too long ago.

I don't agree with Skye throwing Bahrain at May like that as she knows the trauma May has with it, but people also use it as another excuse to hate on Skye. May was egging her on, telling her the inhumans were dangerous. Yes, they were scared of the monolith. Another example of no one listening to Skye. Again, I don't think Skye should have thrown that at May, but I don't exactly use it against her overall character when May and Coulson were putting all that onto Skye.

Here they go with the Indexing. This is the part I don't agree with Coulson one bit. Indexing those with powers is a violation, and the show itself shows why it's a bad thing during season 4 with the Sokovia Accords.

“I miss my plane" ME TOO

THE HULA GIRL😭

“One of the greatest threats SHIELD has ever faced" You mean the innocent people who want nothing to do with you? and not, you know, THE NAZI ORGANIZATION THAT WAS IN YOUR ORGANIZATION FOR THE LAST 70 YEARS!?!?

I'm always indecisive if Gonzalez going in instead of Coulson was a good idea. Coulson is too close to the situation with Skye, but Gonzalez's views of these people are all wrong.

That "May" and Bobbi leaving scene was way too quick that the signs weren't there and may for an interesting reveal.

And here's Mack's first attempt at quitting. Wait til he finds out he's Director in 2019.

Mack joined SHIELD in 2002 (13 years prior to 2015).

“My people would never blindly follow me into a war" Until you start one...

“It's me who's changed" THIS LINE HURTS SO BAD

“I think we've been spending too much time together"

And the confusion of two Mays begins.

FUCK YOU WARD

How did they even get the coordinates with Afterlife? It was because they were watching Gordon, right?

Fun fact for those who may not know, the actress who played Alisha (the multiplier), Alicia Vela-Bailey, is also the stunt double for Bobbi and her husband (I don't know his name) was the stunt double for Ward, so the fight between them in the finale is essentially a husband and wife fight.

“I was always excited to meet you" AWWWWW

I love May, she's my favorite after Daisy, but her totally disregarding the fact that Gonzalez did in fact send agents to contain and possibly kill Skye rubs me the wrong way. Does that count as gaslighting? Another reason Skye was more inclined to side with the inhuman than SHIELD.

“I hope your mother was everything you wanted her to be" always hits me, especially when Daisy brings it back in 7x10.

The turn with Jiaying almost feels sudden, but the episodes leading up have small clues. Also, she's right. Her scars from Hydra are much deeper and painful than Gonzalez's.

There's a certain type of feeling hearing Jiaying, a victim, quote Whitehall, her absuer. It's creepy, but you know shit is about to go down.

I see so many reactors and podcasters call Skye stupid for siding with the inhumans, but from her side, it looks like SHIELD shot at Jiaying. She had no way of knowing. Given SHIELD's record at this point, I'd probably have the same reaction.

2x21 S.O.S. Part 1

Lincoln's little slide to Jiaying is funny to me. I don't know why.

I'll never understand Jiaying's order for the inhumans to fire on themselves. That is literally getting your people hurt.

And now the blame for "SHIELD" hurting the inhumans is all put on Skye. Someone please just tell this girl that none of this is her fault.

And a SHIELD agent literally shot an inhuman right in front of Skye. People really need to stop saying Skye chose wrong. She has no reason to believe SHIELD.

OOOHH SHE DREW BLOOD FROM MELINDA MAY

Small Ruben Mackenzie mention

May waking up from being unconscious with Cal singing is so funny for no reason. She is just immediately like "WTF??"

Coulson is the only one considering that Skye doesn't have the full story and understands why she's acting the way she is.

And the true purpose of Jiaying's power is revealed, and it is quite terrifying.

To be fair, Skye chose based on how people have been treating her.

“Generosity of others" Not sure that guy was willing to give up his life.

Surprised Jiaying didn't have much of a reaction to hearing her daughter had been shot before. She was literally on the verge of death.

“When I find him, I'm going to kill him" Yes, please do, May.

As someone who hates needles, Ward putting those needles in Bobbi's fingers always makes me feel sick.

“It's her usefulness" Don't really like Skye's value being her use.

“There's always someone else to blame" And there's Ward's entire character arc cause he can never take responsibility for his own morals and actions.

Bye Bye Raina. You were a fun and interesting character.

Also, Jiaying, say bye to your daughter cause you just lost her trust.

This was the one time (I think) that Jiaying called her Daisy by her birth name in front of her.

Why Spain, Ward?

To be fair, Ward, May chose you, not Coulson.

The knee break always gets me😬

I've said it before, but Skye's family story is so sad I feel so sorry for all of them.

And here, we start the great Daisy and Mack friendship/sibling-ship that becomes one of my favorite platonic relationships in the whole show.

How many multiples can Alisha make at once? Cause she makes three right now.

Mack is such a badass I love him.

Monster Cal is hilarious.

This SHIELD team just loves to run their cars into people, don't they?

2x22 S.O.S. Part 2

That damn battering ram.

Poor Cal. He just wanted his family back together.

I'm about to theorize about Jiaying's power. We know she can drain life, but then season 7 comes around, and it is implied that she can give life to heal others. So basically, is Jiaying like a holder for life? Like a container? She can drain life, but she hangs onto it, causing her to not age, until she is needed to heal someone else? Just a thought.

“Just you and me, Tremors" MY HEART!!!!!

“Not the skills I'm looking for" Glad someone remembers Skye's root abilities.

Thank you, Lincoln, for finally questioning Jiaying's intentions.

Ginger Ninjas™

I know how this episode ends, but Hunter slowly opening doors still makes me nervous.

Kara, do you really think you can outsmart Melinda May?

BOBBI NOOOOOOOO

HAHAHAHA THAT'S YOUR FAULT WARD

It's always small moments of May's expression going really soft that really show you how much she cares about her team. I love that she shows her love for them through her actions, but these small moments are really nice too.

I wanna know more about specialists like May's medical ability as May seemed to tend to Bobbi on the way back to base. Obviously, I feel like CPR is must from all agents, but like, to what extent at Operations were they taught medical treatments?

“I just wanted to hear your voice" MAY AND ANDREW WERE SO SWEET😭

“Do good Melinda, then get home safe." UGGHHHH MY HEART

Bobbi and Hunter's relationship making everyone question their love lives.

Also, I feel for Jemma. I always felt like her wanting to talk to Fitz felt like she was forced to by herself. Like she felt like it was something she had to do since their friendship would never be the same, so might as well try the love thing out. That's just how I felt about it.

Jiaying is such a great character. I constantly feel sorry for what has happened to her and who she eventually became.

“I'm the guy who kills Gordon" YES

Never mind, Jiayings says "Daisy" to Daisy at least one more time.

No-Eyes™

“Hiya Honey"😀

I don't like Jiaying throwing that back at Cal. He is trying to protect Daisy. At this point, he's protecting her from you.

“Trust me, you will miss"

Skye really did hold her own really well against the Ginger Ninjas.

Jiaying actually is right in the situation, but, like she said in 7x10, she went about it all wrong. The inhumans did simply need protection cause the world wasn't ready for them.

First time watching, I knew the moment Jiaying put her hand on Skye's face what was going to happen.

Jiaying calling her children her true gifts, but then turning around and betraying her own daughter.😭

QUAKE THEME (yes, I will say it time everytime it's there)

“We're not bad, we're misled" Another reason they shouldn't need the Index.

That stabbing sound is a heart attack waiting to happen. Was actually scared for Fitz when I watched it the first time.

Also goodbye Coulson's Left Hand™

Again, Johnson Family story is just so sad and heartbreaking. Feel sorry for Daisy, Cal, and Jiaying for everything that has happened to them.

AOS Don't Kill Jiaying By Snapping Her Spine Challenge is clearly a fail.

Prints for Zephyr 1!

I wanna see Bobbi on morphine.

I want someone to watch over me the way SHIELD men watch over their loved ones when they're hurt.

What does Bobbi actually mean when she says "I can't do this anymore"

“Cutting off my hand without asking"

Was Mack being in charge of alien artifacts ever said again after the finale?

YES MAY! YOU TAKE THAT BIKINI WITH YOU! YOU ALSO DESERVE THIS BREAK!

Who had Andrew recruited for the Secret Warriors at this point? File seems big.

“I imagined you perfect, and you're way more interesting than that" Wish my parents thought the same thing about me. I'm just projecting now.

SHIELD should have adopted an agency dog from Cal's practice.

SHE'S DAISY SHE'S DAISY SHE'S DAISY SHE'S DAISY

I love her.

If it's just Daisy, how come the file is big and Andrew said he already had names.

Daisy is worthy of touching and DRIVING Lola!

AND WE'RE ABOUT TO MEET SOME GREAT INHUMANS LIKE JOEY AND ELENA!

BYE SIMMONS! HAVE FUN ON ANOTHER PLANET FOR 4,722 HOURS!

Would just like to mention, Seasons 4 and 7 might be the most enjoyable seasons for me to watch, but season 2 will always have a special place in my heart. Not just cause Daisy is my favorite character, but being Half-Asian myself, seeing a Half-Asian character like Daisy discover herself and really dive deep into her heritage is something that’s just so special to me. I could go on and on how Daisy has made me feel seen and made me want to connect more with my Filipino heritage, but there just aren’t enough words to describe it. Just wanted to leave this here about why I love season 2 so much.

#samrewatchesshield #aos rewatch #agents of shield #aos #aos season 2 #aos season 2b #aos 2x11 #aos 2x12 #aos 2x1: #aos 2x14 #aos 2x15 #aos 2x16 #aos 2x17 #aos 2x18 #aos 2x19 #aos 2x20 #aos 2x21 #aos 2x22 #daisy johnson #quake #melinda may #phil coulson

[talldarkandroguesome]

5th of Last Seed, Fredas

I was disturbed by my reception in Serk. When I arrived, I found the streets bleak, nearly all empty. The few people I saw around were in a terrible state indeed, though I heard a conversation between two people saying that they needed to go for another tincture of the cure, for they were feeling a bit under the weather and thought perhaps they had not been given a big enough dose.

It only confirmed my suspicion that the Maulborn were peddlers of false curatives and were only compounding a terrible situation.

I spent several hours walking around the town. There were, it seemed, quite a few people who were not afflicted. When I asked them about the blight that had been sweeping their town, they sneered and said that they did not believe that the Maulborn had any love for any of them and that the cure was clearly a shameful scam to make money off the families of those affected. We spoke of how, ever since the Maulborn had arrived, more people became ill. Even people who were healthy would take the curative and then go about their lives, only to fall ill shortly after.

One woman, a little older than the rest, said she thought that it was probably the fault of one of the Maulborn, that perhaps they had been catching the sickness themselves and then when they were seeing the healthy people, they were spreading it to them then.

That was a very good theory and I put it down to parchment. I have been keeping a small booklet of notes. I want to have something to give to Almalexia, something that will document all that I find. If I cannot put a stop to the spread, at least I can try and find the source or how it is transmitted. Anything that might prevent it ravishing our city and our people. No doubt our House will have access to it as well.

Once it was getting on towards evening, I decided that I should try and learn more about the Maulborn and their quarantine. Perhaps there would be more answers in those questions, I thought. I decided to speak with the mayor and their people, to see if I could learn about how the Maulborn had been given permission to take over a part of the town for their dealings and what credentials they had given.

As I headed towards the mayoral estate, I caught up with a woman who was still looking quite healthy, if upset. She said that her name was Aerona and she was looking for her brother, Dethisam, the town’s consul. He had been checking on the afflicted just the day before and had disappeared.

I said that I was sent by Almalexia to learn more about the blight and that I would be happy to help her. She thanked me and said she would show me where he was supposed to be going. She had made the trek herself, but thought that someone with some authority might help her to get more answers.

The first house we went to, it was clear that the woman inside had been ill for a time. The whole place was a mess and the smell was nigh unbearable. I claimed I had dropped my quill and went outside a moment just to get some fresh air.

The poor woman was retching into a bucket when I returned and I thought I was to be faint, so we made our questions brief. She apologized time and again about the state of herself and her home. I tried to assure her that as ill as she was, it was to be expected if she was living alone and, truly, she should not be embarrassed at all.

She mentioned that the Nostrum was to bring her another dose of the curative and that it had an awful taste, but that it cleared the blight right out of your system. Said she felt remarkable after ever dosage she received.

I made very close notes of her descriptions of times she had been given the curative and the symptoms she had. Something about the timing seems very suspicious indeed. It almost seemed to make her worse, though it is hard to tell. Perhaps one of the ingredients of the mixture makes those who are ill slower to fight off the illness. Not entirely sure yet on this front, Aerona and I still have a few more places to check by. She is determined and I must thank her for being as driven as she is. She is helping the woman in that house to be rid of some of the refuse. I opened the windows for her, but then said I had to make notes. A coward’s move, perhaps, but the smell truly is overwhelming.

As I am further away from it though, I could swear there is an underlying hint of something I almost recognize. I simply cannot put my finger on it.

I am sure it will come to me in time. I only wish I knew what it was. It is driving me mad that I cannot recall where I know it from.

#ESO #TES #RP #Dunmer #Elder Scrolls Online #The Elder Scrolls

[punkpsychologist]

HELLO

AAA. OKAY. ITS BEEN A BIT. You know, I actually drafted this post before but my fucking power went out and I lost it. So here we go again.

Main parts of this motherfucker

where I've been

what happened (yes these are two different things)

where I'm going and how I feel about it

alrighty. so I successfully finished my first year of college at a community college near my home town. i worked asynchronously and was able to make it onto the dean's list again for the second semester!

so all of that was good and well but if you have read some of my previous posts you might know that there is a very specific Scholarship that i have been after. it was very important and was considered to be a deciding factor on if i would be able to go to a university and live in the dorms or not. i did not get the scholarship. my mother and i felt very confident that i would but it was very new and the school that created it had yet to really solidify how it worked and what it's requirements were. in otherwords, the prospect of the Scholarship was unstable from the beginning.

i never got any kind of email or correspondence that explicitly said that i would not receive the Scholarship but i found that it would primarily be given to sophomores. i'm a college first-year who is very close to achieving an associate's degree. my mother and i panicked back during my finals week over the Scholarship. after realizing that I would have a better chance if i had my associates, my mom and i made a plan to put me into a "maymester" course and to completely fill my summer with classes. if i was able to pass all of those classes, I would have my associates by august. now i mentioned that this plan was created during finals week, i was incredibly tired and my pms was putting me in a really bad space. i felt this kind of sense of hopelessness, like it all felt very fruitless. i was tired and i had been continuing on the thought that once i finished my finals that i would get to rest. after realizing how fruitless the effort could be, we scrapped that plan and opted to place me into a full load of classes for the second half of the summer, i was waaaayyyy more supportive of this. my classes begin on july 5th and im once again in the class of one of my favorite professors so we'll see how it goes.

it gets a little more interesting here. so i told you that i never was explicitly told that i was denied the Scholarship, so there was a period of time in the early summer where i was just kind of in this limbo of searching for answers. i was scrambled and panicked and felt rather hopeless. i need to leave home. it's not that my family is bad to me, quite the opposite. i am the only child of a single mother, my father overdosed on opioids when i was a toddler, and my mothers family stepped up to help raise me. i grew up extremely paranoid of people and was always very close to death-related situations. i was also sexually assaulted by someone close to me and couldnt tell anybody. i believe that i am a psychologically unhealthy individual. i have incredible amounts of empathy and sympathy for people, i am also extremely afraid of people. due to my anxiety mixed with my trauma and pms i go through phases of being paranoid and unjustly afraid of people that i love very much. the covid19 quarantine was the most enabling thing that has ever happened in my entire life. i didn't have to talk to anybody aside from my mother or leave my house. i made myself think i was safe and happy when in reality i was slowly allowing my anxiety to consume me. when i say this im serious, like having panic attacks in the grocery store because i cant manage all the people that i run into and lying to someone that i love very much because im afraid to go out and i dont know how to explain to him what exactly is making me act this way. i dont know how to function without my family, and they are all much older than me. i know they will die and i will eventually be left alone.

tldr: i need to be around people my own age and i need to be around them physically because my mental health has gotten out of hand

one of my friends inspired me to transfer to university a year earlier than initially projected. the Scholarship was needed to be able to go.

while in Scholarship limbo my mom straight up called me over and said "you know you're going to the dorms in the fall right?" and i stg its like i had a mini breakdown. AFTER ALL THAT FUCKING SHIT. I GET TO GO. I GET TO GO!!!!!!!!!! I DON'T KNOW WHY SHE DIDDN'T TELL ME EARLIER. THIS DID THIS WHEN I TRIED TO QUIT BAND IN HIGH SCHOOL AS WELL. MAN. I'm so happy, I can't possibly explain how simultaneously happy and afraid I am. Going off and to the dorms is the best possible outcome I could ask for but in yet it is the one that I feared the most. I wonder if this was her way of trying to get me to see how far I would go to try and scrounge up cash or if she wanted to see how devoted I was to the idea of university.

Either way. I have my dorm room and roommates secured. I was on campus a few days ago for an orientation. I also have a couple of friends as well as some organizations that I intend to join. For privacy purposes I still can't tell you all where I'm going or when exactly a lot of things are happening. I will probably upload pics of my room though.

If you're here, thank you. I hope you're doing alright, I genuinely hope anything youre struggling with becomes easier and that you find yourself struck with inspiration often <3

#college update #major college update #ouija vents #ouija talks #university #studyblr #university life #psych student #they let me in #punk academia

[meanwhileinstasiville]

Some things you can find yourself dealing with in a place like this

*Sits down* *skinhead looking guy yells "positive male role model" out of context in what I assume was a conversation before that. Within a minute or so.

And then this guy. And then the skinhead makes another pass "my son in law" he yells. Like a nazi daddy or a skinhead bootlicker thing? But I digress.

So I got to see a veterinarian with aVh on the sign try to double bill for removing anal glands from a dog. Procedure at place and time had nothing to do with that, and as anyone might assume; they can only be removed once.

Now, secondhand because I'm seated away from their office, it's relayed to me that "is there any way we can top that!?!" As said by the vet to his assistant. And meaning it was intentional. Of course that seems *extremely specific a thing* to try that with because that's a young dog surgery. As expensive as could plausibly be assumed.

So there's more to the story with this. Years ago I'm beefing with a coworker over a lot of different things, and what this amounts to is, sitting in Ashland restaurant formerly a greasy spoon building across the street and *waiting almost an hour for a hamburger when the place is all but empty* Almost empty because I'm sitting at the counter rather than a table and there's a sketchy thuggish guy whose decided to sit next to me. And this is exactly like the vet but immediate and personal. And it's cold when I get it, too. Something of a recurring theme.

It's not like they're being called out on it so much as it's not taken politely, and so they lean farther into it. About like someone who's taking your newspaper and you know they kill you if you catch them; you can have these vague suggestive conversations about the stuff but then, a newspaper is worth murder.

And I've got stories like this going all the way back through school and *I'm over forty* now. And yes, this place is so-called "little Chicago" since the 1920s.

So it's school districts and businesses, a lot of management around them, street gangs, drug traders, a chunk of the student body of at least one highschool from what I've experienced around town. A friend commented on "how expensive all this must be" and *it's Chicago* a lot of homeowners here don't work and I would guess it's a majority.

So I can get sought out by a scoffing group of latinos referring to me as "speaking of the wild goose" at the end of sutton. Why? Because a fire gutted the neighborhood next to a golf course less than a mile from an interstate called "the freeway". So they're redlined yes and no because it's total loss to the people who lived up there, meaning bare land, and they can build houses on the cheap. Arson is a really good way to crash the neighborhood, I guess. And I'm not Chicago but they seem true to form in "whitening" latinos by getting them houses here.

And again, we've got some unbelievable number of convenience stores here since quarantine; tiendidas every few blocks. Ashland can put them next to the huge number of gas stations left over from prohibition; one of which even *became a literal bar* called growler guys. And a smoke shop up a street from another smoke shop. One next to a carpet store. The other next to a tattoo parlor. So it's haves and have nots like class war but they're all in the same business. And *to me* while leaving out a whole lot of stories, it feels like a Vichy France thing. Like some people built this place including my own family, and then it got occupied, and then history got weird according to the occupiers.

So it's like, "they have no idea why it's here or how it works" and yet it's Chicago "resort retirement community in perpetuity", and they're all enemies in Chicago but "they're all friends here".

[thewildwaffle]

Humans are Weird: Antibiotics

A story prompt from a user on a03. Apparently, this is my 50th short story, or at least the 50th installment of m humans are weird short stories. Hurray!

****

Ni Andu watched a dried sickle leaf roll across the empty courtyard from her window. A deep sigh made her breath fog up the glass. The courtyard wasn't supposed to be empty. Especially not this time of year. The Gauru Ni Moon Festival usually brought visitors from around the world and across multiple star systems right about now. But the disease meant no bright banners were hung. No music echoed cheerily through around the corners and down the streets. There were no wafting scents of fresh fruits and fried breads.

It was amazing and terrifying that something so small that it couldn’t be seen had done all this. The Ni were a proud race, rich in culture, and until now, seemingly sturdy in constitution. Diseases had come and gone in the past, but in such small and freak cases that they were hardly given much attention. It was assumed that Ni immune systems were the best in the galaxy and many other races had even requested to study how they were so effective.

Those prideful memories felt hollow now as Ni Andu sighed and pulled herself away from the dreary sight outside. As a new and reluctant head of the house, she had more pressing things to deal with than moping in the past. Several members of her own family were still sick, two of her hatch mates had been very touch-and-go as of late. She slowly made her way to the cushions where they were sleeping to check on them. To her relief, she saw the soft blankets they were wrapped in rose and fell slowly. She stood there, watching them for a bit in the gathering darkness of their shared humble abode. Matki’s breathing sounded like gravel stuck in a child’s rolling skiffer.

“What are we going to do?” Andu’s wide nose scrunched up as she begged the silent house. “What am I supposed to do next?”

She wasn’t sure how long she stood there trying to think of everything and nothing all at once. It was a good while though and was only interrupted when a small light turned on in the meal room. Andu looked up at the light streaming out of the door’s archway. With a sigh, she gathered her strength to move again to see who was up. As she approached, she heard small claws scrabbling on the stonework floor and storage pods opening and closing.

Sure enough, when she peeked in, Andu could see little Piri shuffling through food storage pods that looked even less stocked than she thought they’d been. There were a few bottled foods, a few containers of ingredient-prepped soup containers, but certainly nothing immediately ready for consumption. Most easy and ready-to-eat foods had been eaten long ago or destroyed when they began to decay and grow dangerous molds. And to a small three-year-old Ni, that basically meant there was no food at all.

“Hey Piri, are you hungry?” Even though Andu had kept her voice quiet, little Piri still jumped and tucked his small thin tail like he was ashamed he’d been caught. Andu smiled comfortingly and stepped into the room to pick up one of the soup packs.

“It’s okay, you’re fine,” she patted him on the head softly, “I think it’s time for a meal too. I’m sure everyone else would agree once they wake up and smell the food.”

“There’s not much left,” Piri’s small voice was so sad and only made the words themselves feel sharper to Andu’s hearts. She tried to think of something she could say to make their situation seem less dire, but nothing came to mind. Instead, she scooped up Piri’s small form and waited until his thin arms latched securely around her scruff before she walked over to get a pot to cook in. She was going to have to add quite a bit of water to this if it was going to make enough to sustain everyone for a meal.

Cooking, even making something simple, helped ease Andu’s mind. There was a sense of normalcy in standing in front of a firebox and stirring a bubbling pot of soup. She tried to ignore how thin it was. Still, the smell made her feel warm and it must have wafted across the house as she could soon hear the tell-tale signs of her hatch mates waking up. She gathered bowls and filled each one. Lowering Piri back down, she handed the young Ni a bowl and carried the rest to the cushions where the rest of the family was slowly waking up.

They ate together slowly, trying to make the contents of their bowl last and talking quietly about anything they could to distract themselves from their situation. Matki was recalling a story from four lunar years ago when Andu had entered a fried bread pastry into a competition. Between Matki’s coughing and Andu interjecting to defend herself, the story kept getting interrupted! She’d worked on the recipe for her pastry for so long and was so proud of it, but the night before, something went wrong when she was making her entry. Whether it was nerves, exhaustion, oversight, or Jentala above forbid, sabotage, it went very wrong. From the way Matki described the judges’ reaction, one might have thought Andu had purposefully tried poisoning them! As everyone chuckled, Matki claimed he still had the video recording from the competition and pulled it out, much to Andu’s chagrin.

Andu pretended to be exasperated by the teasing, but really she was just glad everyone felt good enough to laugh again.

It took a while before she and the others noticed that Matki hadn’t pulled up the video. Instead, his eyes locked on the comm tablet screen.

“Matki?”

“Hey, did you find it?”

“Matki are you okay?”

Matki finally looked up, eyes still wide from whatever he’d been looking at. “They’re coming to help.”

Everyone shared a worried look. What?

“Who are you talking about? Who’s coming?” Andu broke the confused silence.

Matki tapped something on-screen with the pad of a finger and a holographic projection display rose up.

Everyone watched enraptured by the newscast. It was about humans. From halfway across the galaxy, they’d heard about the Ni’s plight and had come claiming they had a cure. They were offering aid and resources to run tests to make sure their medicine was safe and effective for Ni use and make alterations if needed. They were even claiming they’d help distribute the finalized cure the moment it was given the go-ahead. In the meantime, they were also sending ships of food and supplies.

Andu could feel the back of her throat tighten. Was this real? Did she dare hope? There’d been so many reports before about help being promised, well, not help to this extent, but help nonetheless. They’d ended up being just for show and were proven empty once those who offered realized how impossible the situation really was.

But humans? She’d heard they were tough. And stubborn. Maybe they were stubborn enough to see their promises through?

The embarrassing video of Andu’s failed pastry was long forgotten, the conversation instead jumped between wild rumors her family had overheard about humans and speculation about how long it would take for the humans to actually lend aid if they were really coming at all. Andu could see a shimmer in the eyes of her hatch mates as they spoke that she hadn’t seen in a while. Although she wished she could feel the same optimism, she could also see how quickly they were all tiring out. Although they’d slept most of the day, the disease was still taking its toll on them all.

Once the meager meal was finished, she stood to gather the now empty bowls. She noticed Piri quickly scrape a finger along the side of his bowl to snag any last morsel before she came along to collect it. ‘Jentala above,’ she prayed mentally, ‘if help truly is coming, send it along soon.”

With bellies no longer completely empty, everyone settled in, and soon the room was full of sleeping or near sleeping Ni.

Andu slept fitfully. She dreamed, but it was fractured and confusing. Even before the disease came, she had a hard time remembering her dreams once she woke up. It was near impossible now. She did remember a loud humming noise though. As she blinked her eyes and lifted her head, she realized the humming was still there. She rose and searched for the source. It almost sounded like… engines? But that, that had to be impossible - the quarantine…

She looked out the window. Dried sickle leaves were flying around wildly as a large shuttle slowly came in for a landing in the courtyard. Andu opened her mouth to call out to the rest of her family, but nothing would come. How were they still asleep with this racket? Apparently, it managed to wake up Piri, who nearly made Andu jump when he bumped into her side while trying to climb up for a better view out the window.

“What’s going on? Who’s outside?” Piri waited to ask until Andu had resettled herself after being startled.

“I’m not sure yet,” she answered as they both watched the shuttle’s doors slowly work through the unsealing process. Across the courtyard, she could see other Ni’s faces peeking out their windows. As far as she could tell, expressions seemed to range anywhere from fear to curiosity to… was that hope? Wait, had they seen the newscast last night? Did they think this was… there’s no way the humans could be here already, right?

They both watched intently as the doors finally opened and a ramp extended. Soon a line of creatures she’d only seen on screens filed down wearing yellow vests and hauling huge boxes in their arms or on carts they pulled behind them.

“It is the humans!” Piri yelled and jumped down from his perch. He ran to where everyone was stirring on the cushions, “Wake up! Wake up! The humans are here!”

Andu wasn’t sure if she should reprimand Piri for disturbing them, or if she should join in. Instead, she watched as the humans in the courtyard started setting up stations and continued hauling load after load filled with what must have been hexaheebs of food, clean water, and various supplies.

She turned to look back at her family who were trying to rise as fast as their weakened bodies would allow. Matki began coughing violently and had to rest against the wall. Andu went to help support him when a knock at the front door startled everyone. They all stared at the old chirrowood door, then around at each other. It had been so long since quarantine had started, they’d almost forgotten what a knock on the door sounded like.

After a pause, the knock came again, this time followed by a worried and drawn-out, “Hello?”

Once she was sure Matki was standing stable, Andu, being the least sick among everyone, walked to and slowly opened the door.

A human from the shuttle stood in the doorway. They were wearing a mask over their mouth and nose, but it was definitely a human! Their eyes closed slightly and creased in the corners as they nodded a greeting. “Hi, my name is Ali, I’m part of the relief team that’s been assigned to this district. We’ve got food and essentials to distribute and I just need to know how many are in this household and if anyone here is in critical condition.”

Andu blinked at the human for a moment as she took in what they’d said.

“We, uh, we have four adults and one child. There, there were more, but…” she couldn’t finish that sentence. From the look the human gave her, she didn’t need to finish it. Her sinuses stung as she fought to not cry. The first visitor in how long and here she was almost crying in the doorway?

“I'm so sorry for your loss,” the human’s head bowed and their shoulders dropped. “I wish we’d known and could have helped earlier. Is anyone here in need of immediate emergency care?”

At that point, Matki started coughing again. Andu and Ali looked back to see him sit back down until his coughing died down.

Andu sighed and turned back to the human. “None of us are great right now. Matki’s probably the worst out of all of us. He sounds bad, but he actually has started to stabilize in the past few days.”

Human Ali gave a short nod and started writing something on a tablet in his hands.

“Do you,” Andu’s voice trembled, “we heard a report last night about you. That you were coming. That you… do you…” she swallowed and fought back desperate tears, “do you really have a cure?”

The human’s eyes creased again. “We do.”

Andu didn’t need to turn around to know the effect this had on her family. She heard it. She felt it. This time, she didn’t fight back the tears.

“Right now,” Human Ali continued, “it’s in the final stages of approval for Ni use, we’re just waiting for the ‘go-ahead’ and we’ll help distribute it as soon as it arrives. Until then, I’ve got some food and supplies for you. I can help unload and unpack if you need?”

“That… that would be... thank you,” she wiped at her tears. “Thank you so much.”

Over the next few days, more shuttles came and went, bringing more supplies, food, tools, and just in general, a brighter outlook and mood to the entire neighborhood. The humans really were here to help, and they seemed happy to do so. Not only were they good with their promises of aid, but they also delivered on the cure they said they had. Ni were instructed on the drug’s use and administration directions thoroughly for both the tablet and liquid forms of the cure. The effects were quick, and from the reports on the newscast, overwhelmingly positive. The Ni were cured! The plague that had once threatened to wipe out their entire population was gone! Celebrations larger than even the Gauru Ni Moon Festival were planned, songs were written, stories shared and spread. It was wholly agreed by all that this was a historic time in Ni history that they all survived through, and all thanked Jentala above for sending the humans to help.

It went without saying that everyone wanted to know more about the cure itself. And that meant everyone, not just the Ni, but the rest of the galactic community who before, had written the Ni off as a lost cause because of the horrific disease. What was this miracle cure? What other things could it do? Where, by all that is bright and shining, did the humans get it, and could it be easily replicated?

The humans, for their part, were again as open and gracious with their information as they had been with their aid. It was an old medicine they’d discovered long ago on their planet. Considered to be the first “antibiotic,” it was widely used on Earth and had saved millions of lives since its discovery. It worked by interfering with bacteria cell walls and destroyed them by causing them to burst.

It was called

Penicillin.

“Amazing!” “Spectacular!” “So simple, yet so ingenious!” many in the galactic community praised. “How ever did you discover this amazing drug?”

The initial answer wasn’t too surprising, for humans at least: it was an accident.

Andu almost snorted as she read the report to the rest of her family. Granted, the end of the plague was the first time any of them had come in direct contact with humans, but they all had heard many of the stories about human escapades. Wild experiments that on paper seemed more like a drunken brainstorm party that ended up advancing rocket fuel technology by at least 8 lunar years. Crash-landings on category 3 death worlds and they ended up liking them so much they decided to set up colonies. Half of what they did seemed to be mistakes that just went right for them. Apparently, the miracle drug penicillin was included in those stories.

She looked up its history and manufacturing.

Andu felt claws dance down her back as she read more. It came… from mold? Mold?! She looked up from the tablet to the faces of her equally horrified hatch mates. It took them a moment to remember how to close their mouths.

"You mean like mold on old bread?" Piri broke the shocked silence.

Andu blinked and looked back at the report. Old bread? How many times had they not eaten bread fast enough in the warm humid seasons only to pick up a bul of bread and find mold growing on it. It was dangerous, it had to be carefully disposed of, it was… able to save lives?

She returned to the report. The more she read, the more comforted she became in the safety of the miracle antibiotic. That, and she couldn't argue with the results. Her family was around her, now loudly being altogether boisterous together as they "discussed" the humans and all the ways they played with death in order to save life.

Matki snatched the tablet from her claws, wanting to read the report for himself. As Andu was jostled by her now healthy, energetic family, she was just happy and eternally thankful that the humans were crazy enough to play with something as dangerous as fungus, and then kind enough to share what they discovered.

#humans are weird #aliens #space orcs #disease #penicillin #antibiotics #immune systems #space #hfy #ni #space australians #writeblr #original writing #short story

[thefanficmonster]

Love For The Faceless

Corpse Husband x Youtuber!Reader(Female)

Warnings: Swearing

Genre: Fluff 

Summary: Y/N is a YouTube gamer who has recently gained a much larger following thanks to the streams she does with her friends. Naturally, considering her faceless and bodiless nature, people are starting to get curious about her. When she finally follows her friend Corpse’s example, a lot more than her hands is revealed.

Requested by anon, you know who you are 😉 Thank you so much for placing a request and hope this fic fulfills the expectations you have for it.

“Hey!“ I greet the lobby as I finally hop into the Discord call after quickly saying ‘hi‘ to my audience.

I’ve been a YouTuber for four years now and I’ve only recently started streaming, encouraged to do so by my best friend Rae. She’s the one who got me in multiplayer games such as Among Us and Phasmophobia which led me to meet her amazing gaming squad that consists of some of the most famous names on the platform. They are all wonderful people and I will forever be in Rae’s debt for introducing me to them. However, becoming friends with Felix, Sean and the rest of the team brought not only a more fulfilled life, but also a small boost in following. Who am I kidding, it wasn’t small. It was overwhelming, terrifying even.

My YouTube channel had a little over a million subscribers at the start of quarantine and now....now it’s closer to three million. Speaking of three million, I’m about to reach it any day now and it’s really hard to believe. I’m a gaming youtuber and I’ve never considered changing my genre despite expecting to not get any attention whatsoever, with all the big names on the platform. I was convinced not even as many as a hundred people would stumble across my videos and now here we are.

My OG subscribers are very supportive of my sudden growth and are defending me when my newer fans ask for a face reveal or whatnot. While we’re on that topic I might have to mention that not even my YouTube friends, and that includes Rae have seen my face. I’ve been faceless and bodiless for the entirety of my time on social media. Some claim I do it to grab more attention or for dramatic effect, but the reason is beyond that. I’m not shallow. Actually, shallow people are the reason I don’t show my face. I’ve never been the prettiest, but my middle school bully thought that I wasn’t lacking self confidence enough. As a result, I ended up with a not so handsome scar on my right cheek that starts from the corner of my mouth and nearly misses my eye. Yeah, it’s a long and pretty noticeable scar that has thankfully become less and less obvious as the years have progressed. Still, it’s not something I’d like to show to my viewers.

Eight ‘hi’s greet me back, each making my smile grow wider. “Sorry I’m late guys. Technical difficulties.” 

“Don’t worry.“ Rae’s voice dominates over the rest, “Corpse still isn’t here so we’re waiting for him.“

I mute myself on the Discord call and take a look at my comments. I’m most flattered by the comments about my voice. Seeing as how they don’t have much to compliment about me other than my content, they make the nicest comments about my voice, personality and humor. Those comments are the ones who warm my heart most. Even when people in my day to day life compliment my appearance I can’t find it in me to believe they are being genuine. I’d like to believe these amazing people are being one hundred percent honest when they tell me they like me for who I am and not for what I might look like.

“Sorry I’m late guys.“ A deep voice causes me to even physically jolt, switching my focus from the comments to the Among Us lobby where my eyes land on the newly materialized black avatar.

“Hi Corpse.“ Rae greets him.

“Hello mister who broke Twitter!“ Sean laughs, provoking the laughter of the rest of the players.

“Yeah, congratulations man. That’s a big deal.“ Felix chimes in.

“Thanks guys, but I think you’re forgetting we’re talking about a picture of my hand.“ Corpse chuckles timidly. I have noticed how shy he gets when someone gives him a compliment - like a snail slowly withdrawing in its shell. I find it adorable.

“That’s what makes it even better!“ I unmute my mic, sending my own congratulations.

“While we’re on that topic...“ Rae begins, waiting for the rest of us to shut our traps, suggesting she has something important to say. “Y/N, do you ever plan on doing a reveal like that? Not a face reveal. Just a body part reveal.“

I have no problem talking about the subject with friends but I get nervous when I’m supposed to discuss it with my fans. Seeing as how everyone, including myself, is streaming right now, I get a bit of a stutter in my speech. “Haven’t thought about it yet. But I guess a body part reveal is harmless.” I cringe immediately after letting the words leave my mouth, “That sounds so weird.”

Rae knows that I’m not too fond of my face, but I haven’t told her about my scar yet. I let almost all people I’ve met online think I’m using my lack of appearance for effect. For the mystery of it all. Mysteries attract people which equals attention. Attention equals views and the domino effect continues.

“Just a suggestion. No pressure.“ Rae adds quickly, knowing full well I get anxious when the subject is brought up in front of cameras. “Let’s get this game started, shall we.”

                                                          * * *

The idea dwells in my mind, sitting on the back burner even after I disconnect from the Discord call. I’m sitting in my gaming chair, which was a gift for my two million milestone, and weighing out the pros and cons of the action Rae suggested I take.

“It’s a picture of your fucking hand, dummy. How bad can it turn out?“ I say out loud, shaking my head at my indecisiveness. “You’ll be fine.”

In a blur, two pictures are already posted on my Instagram. The first one captioned ‘Took a leaf from my friend’s book. Did I do it right @ corpsehusband?’ and the second ‘Thanks, Rae. These are on you.’

Rae’s POV

As I’m watching a movie in my living room, I get a notification from Instagram, informing me that Y/N has posted for the first time in a while.

I scoff, “More like the first time in forever.”

The first thing that comes to my mind is the possibility of her reaching that three million milestone that’s been long time coming. I bring the glass of water that’s sitting on my coffee table to my lips, taking a sip as I tap the notification. The picture I see makes me hurry to put the glass back down so I don’t drop it. Y/N’s hand. Her fingers are covered with several thin rings each. And here I thought Corpse had too many rings, this girl has at least two on every finger! 

Then my eyes land on the second picture she has posted only minutes after the first and my heart drops. I struggle to get the water that’s been sitting in my moth down my esophagus while my mind is struggling with the task to comprehend the picture I’m looking at. 

Another hand is resting on top of Y/N’s. A hand also covered in rings but fewer and larger. The nails are painted black. 

I think I know who it belongs to.

Before I can even finish the thought, I’m dialing Y/N. She picks up after the second ring, sound cheery as ever as she greets me. “Hey Rae!”

“Don’t you ‘Hey Rae’ me!” I practically scream. I hate being kept in the dark about anything ever so this is just driving me mad. On top of all, she’s my best friend, for fuck’s sake. “Is that Corpse in the photo with you?!”

“Ugh....“ the cheeriness to her voice is all but gone now.

I go on with my rant, not giving her the time to reply. Not that she would reply. I bet she doesn’t know what to say. “So he knows where you live?! Or was the picture taken at his place?! He knows what you look like?! You have seen him! He has seen you in real life but me, your best friend, haven’t!!! You are breaking Covid 19 protection laws to take pictures?! Are you fucking serious, Y/N?!”

There’s a long moment of silence which frustrates me even more but I literally have run out of things to yell and the power to be angry. I mean, I still am, I just can’t express it.

“Rae, sweetheart, please calm down. You’re scary when you’re mad.“ This girl has some fucking nerve! She’s on the verge of laughing!

“Listen here you...“ 

“Rae, please stop scaring my girlfriend.“ That oh so distinguishable, oh so familiar voice interrupts me.

I am flabbergasted, for a lack of a better term.

“Now that we’ve got you quiet, I can explain.“ Y/N pics up the conversation, “Corpse and I have been dating for six, almost seven months now. We started dating around Easter after talking for quite some time. We moved in together at the end of September. All thanks to you, Rae. You’re the best.” She pauses to breathe in real quick, “There, all caught up?“

I’m in no less shock than I was before she explained. Actually, I think I might be even more confused now. It all just feels like a fever dream. “Yes...no. I don’t fucking know! I need details, Y/N!”

“Details later.“ Corpse makes his presence known once again, “We’re watching Family Guy right now. Talk to you later.“

“Love you, Rae!“ Y/N calls out before the line goes dead.

My arm goes limp, dropping my phone on the couch next to me. 

“Motherfuckers” I mumble under my breath.

Y/N’s POV

It’s been a week since Rae has stopped talking to both Corpse and me. I know she just needs some time to cool off. In the meantime, the rest of our friends were informed and, as oppose to Rae, were nothing but supportive and overjoyed. I bet Rae feels the same way though. Sean, Dave and the rest of the gang have confirmed that she’s incredibly happy for us and says she noticed a spark between me and him since day one, but she can’t help but be mad at us, and especially me, for not telling her sooner.

“Any regrets?“ I remember Corpse asking me when we hung up on her after dropping the bomb.

“Not being able to see her face when she saw the picture.“ I beam at him, feeling as content as ever.

He laughs, agreeing with me before leaning down to kiss me.

@susceptible-but-siriusexual  @simonsbluee  @save-the-sky  @hacker-ghost  @itsminniekat  @bi-andready-tocry  @imtiredaffff  @jazzkaurtheglorious  @hereforbeebo  @fandomgirl17  @chrysanthykios

#corpse #corpse husband #corpsehusband #husband #corpse husband fanfic #corpse simp #corpse husband fanficiton #corpse fanfiction #corpse fanfic #corpse x reader #corpse husband x y/n #corpse husband x reader #x reader #reader #request #requests open

[cherrykindness]

let's make babies |

pairing: Harry Styles x Actress!Reader

summary: you and harry are doing a live on instagram, you've drunk a lot of wine and now the world knows that the future Mrs. Styles is ready to make babies.

warnings: mostly cute, but the title tells you what you need to know 🤪

"What is your favorite song from the Fine Line album?" Y/N read aloud, twirling in her right hand the second glass of wine of the evening, the one already halfway through. "Adore You and Watermelon Sugar, of course."

Harry giggled, rolling his eyes upon hearing his fiancée's statement.

"Y/N will always choose Adore You because it was obviously written for her." He accused. "She wouldn't give that answer under different circumstances."

The comments climbed up the screen continuously, most fans gushing about how cute Harry Styles and YN/LN could be while the other part was concerned with wringing even more information out of the slightly inebriated couple who had decided to do a surprise live one early Sunday morning.

As expected after being away for some time to begin filming Don't Worry, Darling in Southern California, Harry enjoyed a lazy weekend in the house he shared with his fiancée and her pets. The days were filled with late naps and relentless Netflix marathons, sublime and ethereal evenings, marked mostly by unexpected declarations and rounds of sex that used to last until the beams of light were shyly coming through the linen curtains. They were not a monotonous couple, so this order could easily be changed.

"Watermelon Sugar is nothing more than about my love for watermelons, don't get too creative." Harry replied to a fan while sporting a corner smile, the message standing out among the rest for its dozens of emojis and large print, questioning the singer about erotic content behind the lyrics of his latest hit. "I really don't know what you guys are talking about."

Y/N laughed, shaking her head before leaning it against her fiancé's chest, propped up on the soft white pillows that were spread practically all over the bed. The air conditioner was on at a minimal temperature and a light rain whipped on the panes of glass camouflaged by the cream-colored curtain, that being the projection of Y/N's favorite nights.

"You can tell them, I'm not shy." She joked, nudging her fiancé's waist.

"You know what it was written about and who it was written for." Harry replied, raising one of his eyebrows. "That's what matters."

It went without saying that much of Harry's newest album, as well as some of his earlier work, had been done in exclusive dedication to his future wife. Y/N had been the muse for a vast repertoire of romantic songs, and even though the singer preferred to keep the story behind his more explicit compositions a "secret", the relationship the two had shared for more than three years was already solid and known enough for the media and fans to distinguish hidden messages in small details.

"It's a song about what usually comes before the act of making babies." Y/N laughed as he pointed at the display. "Honestly, you guys are impossible."

"No, we make babies every day." Harry joked, making a funny motion with his eyebrows. "I would spend my entire career writing just about that."

"Harry!" The actress exclaimed incredulously, slapping her fiancé weakly on the chest. "Children might be watching this."

"You don't want to have babies with me?" He asked falsely offended, accepting the cup that Y/N offered him. "Because I want some babies with you."

Y/N laughed, rolling her eyes as she watched the internet freak out at the dialogue that had suddenly emerged. Since the beginning of the quarantine, it was kind of inevitable that the couple of artists would not become the darlings of all social media; they were fervently active with photos, videos, and lives that depicted step by step daily life in isolation, gaining more and more followers and making the media more and more fascinated by the relationship they both shared.

The wedding was scheduled for the summer of next year and it was perhaps the most anticipated event in the tabloids. Bets about what the model of Y/N's dress would be and lists presuming who would be selected for the short list of guests stood out among countless news stories about the famous people influencing pop culture today.

The possible arrival of a Styles baby was an inevitable topic in interviews. Harry and Niall were the only members of the ex-boyband that had not become fathers yet, and because they had maintained a solid relationship and were seen as one of the most enviable couples during the last four years, Y/N and Harry had gotten used to all this openly asked questions. They didn't mind, they even had fun with the montages and all the anxiety that dominated the whole internet, often mentioning the fandoms' efforts to represent them as such "cool" parents in perfectly edited pictures.

"No, guys, I'm not pregnant." Y/N amusingly clarified the doubt of dozens of new comments. "Please don't believe so many controversial news stories that appear out there. I was on twitter last week and saw several people theorizing about a possible pregnancy, most of the arguments based on a website that used photos from the set of How to Get Away with Murder in the season where I was actually playing a pregnant woman as Laurel." She laughed. "It's so funny! I know you guys love to guess these things, but we won't hide something so special when it actually happen, I promise."

"Especially because Y/N can hide absolutely nothing from anyone." Harry accused, leaving his drink on the corner table before settling into a comfortable position for the two of them. "Anyone who's a Marvel fan knows that. That's one of her most characteristic quirks."

"They gave me a fake script for the last two movies." Y/N agreed, shaking his head. "For me and Tom."

"We agreed to keep the engagement a secret for a while. The plan was to travel to Holmes Chapel to break the news to my family in person, but guess who got a call at ten o'clock at night from an angry Anne because she learned of her son's engagement from an interview Y/N gave the next day?"

Y/N gave a guilty smile, winking gracefully at the camera. "It was all James' fault! I'm sure he already suspected something, those questions were very suspicious."

"Of course the questions were suspicious, babe. You literally said you had a secret that involved both of us but that you couldn't tell because it was important that our families knew first."

"I thought he would think about a pregnancy or something!" The actress defended herself, feeling very convincing in her intonation bordering on obviousness. "That's a mania I can't get rid of, it's in my genes."

"Did you all hear that? Further proof that you guys don't have to worry about guessing when Y/N's pregnancy will be, I'm sure our baby will make sure to tell you everything while still in the womb, mom's genes will make sure of that."

"You are so funny, Harry Styles." Y/N sarcastically stated, holding back a giggle as countless messages with laughing emojis were frantically up. "Yeah, I know I talk a lot and all, but you have annoying quirks too."

It was obvious that live would be news the next day. Although they were completely open about matters concerning their relationship, nothing seemed better than receiving so much exclusive information from a Harry and S/N drunk on expensive wine.

"You wake up in a bad mood and you're dangerously sexy, that should be illegal."

Harry laughed, holding his fiancée's waist a little tighter as he felt her tumble a little further to the side, getting closer and closer to the edge of the bed. Y/N was dangerously weak for drinks, and the singer knew that the actress' body was already near its limit.

"You're the only sexy person here, love." He declared with a corner smile, evidently finding the whole situation funny. "Do you want to go to sleep now?"

"No." Y/N shook her head. "Can we watch some movie? Can we watch Sweet Home?"

"Of course, love." He murmured, giving the woman a quick kiss on the forehead.

Even though Harry knew that his fiancée was unlikely to make it past the five-minute mark of the episode, he made sure to restart the korean series at exactly the scene where she had stopped, the first chapter still halfway through after Y/N realized that it would be impossible to watch such a macabre work without a drop of alcohol in her blood.

She had been so excited by the taste of Argentinian wine and the idea of updating her fans after a few weeks away, that she had forgotten the main purpose of the live. Harry and Y/N had been apart for a few days due to the new movie the Brit was shooting in North America, all happening in an unrestrictedly careful manner due to the restrictions caused by the pandemic.

He was slowly migrating towards acting and the future Mrs. Styles couldn't be prouder. Y/N had felt on cloud nine when Harry had given her the news of his upcoming job, but her only pronouncement on the subject had been a succinct post on instagram. Just a photo of the couple on a trip to Germany with a simple heart emoji didn't seem enough for the actress' exhibitionist soul, and coming to that conclusion was the main reason she decided to invite him, already relatively changed, for a live appearance. Y/N wanted to go on and on about how much she loved that man and work on that whole honeyed speech that would bring her (once again) the title of "cutest bride of all time," but of course Harry had to come home from his trip with his favorite red wine and poison her with those sweet caresses that took her out of orbit, turning the degree of alcohol content into the least of her problems.

"You're going to kiss Florence." Y/N exclaimed suddenly, as if only now realizing that her fiancé would share the screen with Florence Pugh, one of her closest friends in that industry. "Kiss on the mouth."

The MacBook was still open and hundreds of new comments were going up every second, but Harry didn't bother one bit to warn her about the possibility of her becoming a meme the next day. He was having too much fun with the situation to worry.

"Are you jealous?"

"Yes." She stated with a pout. "I am jealous, I just don't know if I'm more jealous of her or of you."

"But you kiss me every day, babe." Harry laughed. "And you've been kissing other people's men for almost ten years." He joked.

"But I only think about you, I already told you that."

Harry shook his head negatively at the camera, knowing he was sharing with the fans the funniest side of his fiancée.

"I know that, honey." He assured, lightly stroking the actress' back. "I think we'd better turn off the TV and go to sleep now, I'm sure you'll have a terrible headache tomorrow."

The brit planned to bid his audience goodbye and put an end to that recording, but Y/N was drunk and her sense of right and wrong had already gone to space. Harry should have been quicker, however, because his fiancée's speech would be cause for new tags and the only subject for the interviewers for at least the next few months.

"I don't want to sleep, how about we make babies?"

That's what Watermelon Sugar was all about, after all.

#harry styles imagine #imagine1d #imagine harry styles #harry x reader #harry styles x reader #fluffy imagine #harry fluff #actress reader

[oh-for-fic-sake]

It’s A Match Chapter One

Masterlist

Disclaimer

Summary: Filming is over and Henry returns home to and empty house. And he doesn't like it, things are getting to him and he doesn't want to be alone anymore. Then his brother suggests online dating, it sounds mad but henry decides to give it a shot. If worst comes to worst he just deletes the profile. He has nothing to loose right?

Warnings: Angst, Swearing, Cheese, Self Indulgent Fic, Rpf, Plus sized reader.

A/N: so I wrote this before the whole 'girlfriend' shock and everything that has followed. I was of two minds whether to ever post it but honestly, this is my blog and I've clearly stated that i am going to continue writing Rpf. I want to do a little ficlet/mini fic and well here we go. It wont be smutty just  somewhat angsty then fluffy. Enjoy~

Taglist: In Reblogs.

Henry slumped back on the seat in his conservatory and sighed, from here he could see his brothers and their wives outside, each snuggled up on the out door wicker sectional he had got to have the family over. It was the first family get together for over a year. He was happy, god it was amazing to see them but... He couldn't help being a tad envious.

They all had a family, wife and kids to go through this shitstorm in. He had no one, well he ha Kal. But that was it he sighed and looked away sipping from his cup slowly takeing a moment for himself. He needed to just chill, but it was getting hard... This year had really knocked him back he was at an all time low he hadn't felt like this for a long time. He knew he was depressed, he felt stupid there was no reason to be but there we go.

Henry had been getting himself all twisted for a while now, filming the Witcher helped but now that was over and he was home alone. Left with his thoughts in a big empty house.

"Sooo little brother want to tell me what's going on or am I gonna have to get mum in here?" Henry jumped at the voice and spun around to face his brother who was keeping a safe distance at the door. Wiping his hands down clearly just having washed them again.

"I ah its nothing, you know me I'm a worry wart" he said waving off his older brother he didn't want to bring down the mood of the small gathering, it was why he had come in here to take a breather.

"You called us all here for a visit hen, out of the blue when lockdown is still being eased out. Its clear you don't want to be alone, yet your sitting in here alone." His older brother said leaning on the door frame folding his arms trying to figure out what was really going on. He could see his little brother was hurting he wanted to help.

"I've got Kal" Henry said with a chuckle and looked about for the bear only to frown and sigh seeing the room was empty apart fro  him and his brother.

"Kal's outside with the kids hen, what's up? You can tell me you know" henry sided as his sibling  moved sitting in the small seat across from him. He knew that his family would listen but he felt so... spoilt like he was asking too much and was being selfish. It wasn't like him.

He grunted leaning back choosing not to look at his brother instead focusing on the cup in his hand. He spun it slightly then heaved a sigh. He wasn't getting away with not speaking about it, he was going to air out his worries one way or another. With his brother or his mother, and he loved his mother but this was? He wanted to keep this issues close to his chest. So far only Kal knew about his problems.

"I... I've had enough... just had enough of fucking covid and being alone... i felt isolated before all this shit kicked off and now?" He vented releasing all the fears he had. It was tough, he was a family man without his own little family, he hadn't managed to find anyone to share his life with and it got to him. He tried being sincere and polite, he took care of himself and tried staying true to himself but... something was missing it had to be! On paper he was a safe bet a good man! Yet his relationships never worked. There were different opinions or his other half couldn't handle the life style or they tried changing him or they couldn't put up with the way he loved so furiously- so openly wanting to always hold and kiss them. It just never quite worked.

"Its- fuck everything has just caught up with me...worries I've had for a few years now I could ignore them you know? I had other stuff going on, was always out and about meetings and press tours I was busy! But now?" He tried putting his feeling into words but he was conscious, he didn't want to whine or bitch about his life. He loved his work and the life he had made for himself he just? Wanted someone to share it with.

"Now after covid you've got all the time in the world to think?" Henry nodded agreeing with his brother. Covid had made him face these fears head on. He has been alone for the best part of a year with the uncertainty of his work and filming quarantines and isolations.

"Yeah, it hurts I'm... I'm in deep and I? I don't know how I'm getting out of this slump" henry finally said outloud, his brother dipped his head listening to him as he ranted. Started letting out all the frustration and anxiety out but stopped short with another growl closeing his hand around the cup tightly hissing in frustration then looked away.

"And what's caused it? I know you hate being alone but?" Henry sighed shaking his head as his brother tried coaxing more out of him. He drew in a shaky breath wanting to cry, he was just so lost and upset over being upset and alone.

"Two lock downs... Two alone- I? If this carries on for the next few years I don't... I don't want to be alone anymore! I want to settle down, I want an actual personal life! A relationship a family and? How? How am I gonna find all that? They want fame or money or something! Women never seem to want me for me, they say the do then judge me for my hobbies- I'm a geek I like tech and games and fantasy! And women don't like that" he spewed the words like they were venom, half ashamed of being so dramatic but the fear was real. Henry was scared, he wanted love. He wanted a family of his own, and it seemed impossible, now more then ever.

"I want to meet someone who will take me as I am, for me and I just I'm giving up. I'm giving up on it I can feel it, almost forty and look, alone unmarried no kids-I have no one to share my life with, it hurts am I not good enough for that?"  He hung his head as he spoke the final words put loud. He felt so vain and full of himself when he said them out loud, his skin crawled.

But it was how he felt, being the muscular decent looking man he was didn't go with his personality. He was a geek and the woman who were drawn to him didn't want that. And the woman that shared his hobbies normally weren't confident enough to even speak to him. Society's views on acceptable couples had put Henry in no mans land.

"What about online dating?" His brother spoke up but Henry just grunted rolling his eyes frustrated.

"What? No I cant do that I'd be fucking swamped" he hissed in irritation frustrated at the mere suggestion of him trying to date online.

"Whoa hold your horses let me finish I mean come on Hen there's bound to be hundreds of shy sweet women on there, I mean girls that are into your hobbies and stuff aren't usually the ones out and about partying and stuff, so its more likely they will be online" his brother quickly explained before Henry could pop off on one and shut him down.

Henry opened his mouth and stopped himself. That was a good point. Many of the women he would click with weren't going to be in bars or fancy parties. They were normally shy and at home most of the time reading or playing games.

"I... You really think i could meet someone? Meet the one online?" He asked in a small voice warming to the idea. His sibling smiled and nodded enthusiastically.

"Yes little brother, your a down to earth guy, just make a profile and have a look, if you don't like what you see you can delete the profile" henry nodded slowly thinking it over. There'd be no harm if he failed well he'd be no worse off, a little disheartened but that's about it.

"Look write down a few things you want in your dream girl, have a pseudo name like fucking I don't know Hank! Or something and say your a runner on set or something" his brother spoke up quickly as Henry sat back and actually thought about it seriously. He was right, henry could tweak things and be careful about what he shared and if he did meet the one then she'd understand... He could explain the predicament he was in. That he just wanted someone who liked him for him. And he would only reveal himself to her if she was the one and he was sure she would understand. As long as he was himself and honest about everything else in his life then there was no harm... and if he used proper photos of himself just... half cropped out then? It wasn't catfishing? Because he was being himself just using the nickname his mother used to call him.

"O-okay so be myself but... Just tweak a few things? So they don't know its me?" He reiterated to his brother still trying to figure out the morality of this whole idea.

"Yes! No full on pictures, no photos of Kal either new photos henry not old, maybe of your eyes up or something? Girls love blue eyed boy- not your right that brown will give you away... you could even fuck em up with a behind the scenes character photo? I mean come on how many men use a superman photo for their profile these days?" He encouraged wanting more then anything to cheer up his little brother.

"I yeah... That could work ,thank you- I'm sorry I got so worked up it... Its just getting to me now" henry apologised but his brother shook his head and chuckled standing up to go back outside to the others that were all happily chatting in the garden.

"I know Hen, look just give it a go, you might be surprized... come on lets get back out there, after all you are the host~ you cant just run off and hide" henry grinned standing and following his brother. It was decided, he'd give online dating a go!

A week later Henry sat at the computer everything was ready, he'd taken some precise photos and had spent the last half hour writing a profile up. He had felt a little guilty about this... Was he lying? Technically it was him, he was going by Hank which was a nickname his parents gave him as a child, luckily this site didn't require a surname because honestly? He had no clue! To fend off some guilt he had thrown in a behind the scenes photo of himself as superman it wasn't much but it helped take the edge off. The other photos were cropped and there were a good few just so that the women knew he wasn't technically a catfish; he even did one with him covering half of his face with a piece of paper with Hank scrawled across it. At the time he felt silly but it helped with his anxiety over the whole thing.

He paused for a second eyeing the screen rereading the profile over and over trying to make sure it was alright and honest. And it was, he had explained a little about himself, his hobbies and interests and his job... Only brushing over he worked for the film and tv industry recently working for Netflix he hadn't exactly explained what he did but there was enough information.

With a deep breath he clicked the button his mouse hovered over going live with the profile. Now all he had to do was wait and hope he caught a good womans eye. Within moments a few profiles popped up, matches. He scanned them flicking through some of the profiles and felt his heart crack. They were all full of badly filtered photos and used slang that to be honest he didn't even understand. What was so hard about using plain English?

He growled growing frustrated clicking through what were clearly a bunch of wannabe sugar babies. Each profile had a main photo a little bit of info then a few more pictures added to them. He scanned each one quickly going through the motions judging each one. 'Too far away... Your clearly not even eighteen?... Oh you like dc? Really hate to break it to you but thor is not a dc character' Henry grunted as he bypassed what felt like hundreds of women each with their own 'duck face' selfie most advertising their Instagram pages some even ballsy enough to add their only fans pages.

'Wait a second who was that?' He paused and scrolled back up and eyed the image on screen. It was a face on photo a cute woman smiling uncomfortably. Unlike everyone else's there was no distorting blur or heavy editing, the only make up was in the form of eyeliner in a set of black slightly uneven cat eyes. A slightly skewed black flicks making a point of no editing on the photo.

She was a full figured woman with proper kissable round cheeks and a sweet nervous grin. Her eyes were what got him, they were kind and genuine he could see she was uneasy about the photo but she was beautiful. She lived about half hour away which wasn't to bad.

Henry clicked the profile and scrolled down she didn't smoke, drunk occasionally and had no children. She did however have a college education in animal care and ran a small business. Centred on dogs by the looks of it. He moved further down reading the profile.

Y/n, 30, business owner, e/c, 5'4, curvy

I'm shy so will take a while to warm up to you. A honest woman, sometimes to honest I don't seem to have a filter 🤗 I'm laid back and tend to be sarcastic and I love animals I'm a kc certified dog breeder as well as run a small successful business that caters to dogs. So if you are allergic or don't like dogs then leave now but thank you for clicking🙃

I spend most of my free time gaming or reading. I enjoy the fantasy genre and love dc and marvel (though I love dc just a tad more🤫)

I have one fur baby in the form of my lovely girl Amii who is a three year old malamute. Yes malamute not a husky or Akita so again if you don't like dogs or big dogs I'm not the girl for you.

I'm looking for someone to have fun and maybe build a life with. Covid has been tough being single and decided that it was about time I tried this whole online dating thing. If you want to chat pop me a message 🥰

I do not have a personal Instagram, snapchat or only fans! Stop asking for pictures!😠😠

Henry's face split into a huge grin. She seemed to good to be true. She was wholesome, successful in her own right and looked fun. She didn't seem to be full of kale and bullshit. Just genuine and? Henry couldn't put his finger on it but there was something drawing him to this woman.

True to her word there was no Instagram link, no only fans or snap chat or anything. He scrolled further seeing photos of her and the biggest fluffiest dog he had ever seen in his life. She was sitting down next to who he assumed was Amii her dog and he melted. Y/n looked happy and content, living her best life.

There was nothing that sent alarm bells ringing, no racey photos or 'Netflix and chill' innuendos. The profile was clean and genuine.  He was right the woman was a little chunky but extraordinarily beautiful. The curves suited her and made her look more... cheerful and he could tell she was strong aswell, you had to be to have a huge dog like that about you.

There were photos of her walking a large pack of dogs in the wood; that he recognised! They were the very same he took Kal to only ten minuets down the road, he even recognised the small logo of her company on the jacket she wore. He had seen dog walkers wearing the same jacket so he knew of her brand. I he remembered correctly the company offered dog walking, grooming and kennel facilities as well as offering Breeding services helping stud dogs and stuff. They also helped advertise registered breeders and took in rescues for rehoming. It was a brilliant little company that he had even used for Kal once or twice to get his teeth cleaned and nails clipped, because Kal was a bugger for his pedicures!

He moved further down seeing more photos of the woman a small section with the games and tv she liked. Witcher was in both the tv and games category aswell as peaky blinders, Vikings and a few other shows.

Henry paused as he saw the chat button. Should he? He but his lip twisting on the spot in he chair rocking from side to side. What harm is there? He could just send a message she looked like a fun loving woman, he shared the same interests and stuff... so why not?

His fingers hovered over the keys ready to type out the words. But he choked. His mind ran blank what does he say? Hi? I saw your profile? Does he ask for a date? What does he do?

He let his hands fall and growled. Then scanned over the side of the message bar seeing a few pre-typed responses.

'It's a match!' 'You look fun, lets chat' 'I like your profile picture'

He winced they all seemed... wrong? Somehow they were polite and all but it- they wasn't personal or anything just... not quite right. He looked down as Kal came padding over and slumped next to him resting his chin on his foot with a loud sigh. With that Henry had an idea typing away a little message and hitting send before he could really think.

You sighed typing away the latest wage slips and added up all the various overtime, you really needed some more staff on now that lockdown was coming to an end. Thankfully animal care was essential so you hadn't been hit too hard a few staff were on furlough as they were extreme high risk and shielding but you were going out of your way to make the premises covid safe. Luckily it wasn't too hard as much of the business was just a few staff and lots of dogs.

You frowned when a chat icon popped up in to corner of your screen. 'Hank?' You though trying to remember if you knew a Hank? Maybe a client or some old friend... but you honestly couldn't recall. You l saved your document and clicked the small icon bringing up a chat and frowned a you read the little message.

'I call my dog bear but he has nothing on Amii, Shes the fluffiest dog I've ever seen in my life she looks perfect for bear hugs😅'

'what the hell?' You cursed scrunching your nose up at the screen rereading the words. That's a bit random... you clicked his icon a small photo of half of his face then froze as a dating profile opened up. 'Oh... shit' you said seeing that your own profile you'd set up a few days ago out of curiosity had garnered the attention of the handsome blue eyed stranger. You swallowed biting you lip thoughts of finishing updating your records now gone as you scanned Hanks profile and a small smile crossed your face.

Hank, 37, works in the film industry. Blue eyes, 6ft, muscular.

Decided to finally try this online dating, unsure what to say other then I'm looking for a life partner. I like to think I'm funny and laid back. I'm fit and active but that doesn't mean you have to be, but maybe my lady could come for walks with me and my four legged son? I promise he's my best freind and a good boy.

My job is tough and I'm away for long periods of time, but when I'm home I like to play games and am into warcraft. I paint miniatures when I can. Fantasy and superheroes are a big part of my hobbies so if you don't like all things geek then I'm probably not for you.

But if they are? Then feel free to message me, I will reply when I can.

You read and re-read the profile And your hands hovered over your chicklet keyboard. Biting your lip, do you respond? He seemed sweet and real... if that made sense. You took a deep breath. What was the worst that could happen? Asking for a plane ticket? You decided to take a chance and typed back a reply hitting send whilst you had your nerve and then flushed.

"And they say fluffy dogs only lure in women~" You giggled to yourself  moving a hand over the huge fluffy girl beside you giving her pets whislt thinking of a reply.

#henry cavill #henry cavill x reader #rpf #henry cavill fic #henry cavill fanfiction #henry cavill x you #henry cavill x ofc #henry cavill x y/n #henry cavill imagine

[hslotharrie]

To My Best Friend

summary: reader faces quarantine at Harry’s and, turns out, it was exactly what they needed to come clean. also, Anne is the superior Mum.

word count: 2.3k

warnings: completely fluff. with marriage + mentions of family? not edited... when do I ever edit

based off of this ask<3

When you wake, the sun is shining through a slightly opened window in the far left corner of your bedroom. You can hear birds chirping amongst themselves from outside, cars driving far in the distance, it's quiet at Harry's home. Peaceful.

It's been a little more than four months since you and Harry decided to bubble at the beginning of quarantine. What you expected to be a few weeks turned into a lot more, but there were no complaints. Harry has the space, is the type to crave company, and you're his best friend.

Best friend.

You roll in the soft sheets, hugging the covers for a few minutes until you inevitably force yourself to get up for the day. You're not sure what sort of expensive luxury bed set this is, but god, they are comfy. You make a mental note to ask him later.

You zone out again on the soft sounds of the birds and the pleasant cool breeze flowing in through the window. You pull your phone from the bedside table to check the time, 10:56– and the weather, sunny and 78. You consider getting in the pool later.

Harry's phone rings somewhere outside of your room, followed by some muffled mumbling from the man himself signalling that he's awake too. You wonder if he's ate yet; he's a sucker for your omelettes and you're craving one about now.

You climb out of bed,  going to the bathroom to tame your hair and brush your teeth, before heading to the kitchen to put together ingredients for the omelettes.

It's about 10 minutes before Harry appears in the kitchen, provoked by the smell. He places a hand on your lower back as a silent 'good morning!' while he stands to your side to admire your cooking. You try your best to ignore the warm feeling that his touch brings; the feeling that makes you wish for more than just a touch.

It makes you nervous, how quickly his presence has you feeling butterflies or how fast he can make you smile when you're in the darkest of moods. You've been sitting on the feelings for years, they were always there, hiding in the back of your head. The feelings that made you wish you'd shared that drink with him just for the second-hand contact to his lips.

Those are the thoughts that make you nervous. You try not to think about them when he's standing right next to you watching your every move with a wandering hand on the small of your back.

He's dressed in a colourful flannel and some shorts, you notice, much different than your fresh out of bed joggers and t-shirt. You make a mental note to change later, and you consider stealing one of his flannels (there's the thoughts again,) just to have his smell on you.

He pulls away from you to begin setting up the eating area, bringing out cups and silverware and then returning with a plate when he senses the omelette is nearly done. He stands to your left with the plate held in both hands like an excited toddler and when you flip the breakfast meal onto his plate he leans over and presses a quick kiss to your forehead in thanks. The thoughts come rushing back; I like when you kiss me, Harry.

"D'you have any plans for today?" he quizzes, before taking a drink of his orange juice.

"Was thinking about going in the pool later," you tell him, "it seemed nice out, an' I love your pool."

"I rather like my pool too," he chuckles "I'll join you, yeah? Could go for a swim later."

When you finish eating, Harry takes the plates to wash despite your protests. You cooked, he argues, so he cleans. You glance at the time, almost 12, and decide that the time it will take to change and freshen up will be enough for your stomach to settle and therefore a swim will be safe.

Returning upstairs, you first search for a bikini and then your sunglasses, changing and adding a pair of shorts. You brush your hair, throughly this time, and tie it up to avoid contact with the chlorinated water.

Before you go back downstairs, you take a minute to look at yourself in the mirror— doing your best not to allow the thoughts to come forward. (You don't think about how your body will look to Harry, and you definitely don't allow yourself to think about what he might think about the bikini you chose. Absolutely not.)

When you return downstairs to the kitchen, the dishes are washed and on the drying rack. Grabbing two cups and straws, you fill each about half with ice and then filtered water; and carry them both out to the poolside where Harry sits contently in the sun.

Unbeknownst to you, Harry's eyes travel along your body through his sunglasses when you appear from inside of the house, wishing he could touch you. His brain flicks back to the phone call he had this morning with his Mum, how she encouraged him to make a move because she knows you're meant to be. His stomach flips thinking about it.

"Do you remember when we went to that party and you pushed that guy into the pool because he was flirting with me?" you smile, sitting down beside him and handing him one of the cold waters.

"Mm, we had to leave because he was gonna' beat me up," Harry chuckles, "I was drunk. Probably lucky he ended up in the pool."

"You were being protective! It was cute!" you defend,  rubbing his back lazily in comfort. He looks at you in a funny way, smile faltering a little before he returns his eyes back to the pool.

"M'gonna test the waters so the princess doesn't freeze," He proposes, rising from his seat when you give him a playful smack.

You rise as well, shimmying off your loose shorts and moving to sit at the side of the pool. Watching harry submerge himself first, you let your legs dangle off of the edge and into the water. It's cold, but a pleasant, enjoyable cold in the hot sun.

You sit contently for a few minutes, enjoying the water on your legs and watching harry swim back and forth. You lean back and turn your attention somewhere else, trying to avoid being caught staring.  Suddenly, though, a hand brushes up the side of one of your submerged legs, informing you of Harry's presence.

"Y'coming in?" he asks, standing now. He's tall, so your faces are about level now.

"Are you in a hurry?" He's close enough now that he's dripping cold water on your skin.

"Maybe,"

Suddenly, he's gripping your waist to lift you and pull you into the water. You squeal, grabbing his shoulders as leverage as he practically drops you into the water that feels ice cold against your warm sunny skin. He laughs loud and happy when you splash water in his direction as payback.

Soon, both of your energies mellow out. Harry's on his phone, while you're floating around in a doughnut shaped floatie. Harry snaps a photo, but you don't notice.

When it's time to get out, Harry offers to go grab the towels while you float around for a few more minutes. He's driving you crazy in the best way. Your skin still tingles where he had touched your sides to lift you into the water, and your palms burn with the memory of his bare shoulders.

When he returns, it's like his energy has changed. The sight of a shirt over his chest makes you frown momentarily, and he's light on his feet rather than the happy strides he took on his way into his home. You see him tuck his phone into his pocket as if he's been talking to someone again, and when his eyes meet yours the wide smile is hiding something else.

When you slip out of the doughnut and climb up the pool ladder, he mumbles a soft "c'mere" and wraps the towel around your shoulders. His eyes watch you for a little longer than they should've.

"Mum called again," He murmurs.

"I's she doing well? Is that who called this morning?" you question, keeping your attention on his eyes.

"Yeah, woke you up I suppose,"

"Not at all!" You defend.

He goes quiet, picking at his fingernails (a nervous habit you notice he's developed since beginning to paint his nails) and looking off to the side to avoid holding eye contact with you. This makes you nervous, he's never this way around you.

"Harry,"

"I'm sorry, 'shouldn't be such a big deal," he says, letting out an awkward laugh.

A soft smile appears on your face, taking his hands into yours to part them. Gently, you move towards him, pressing yourself wordlessly into his body and allowing his hands to wrap around your towel-covered body. It brings him comfort, and you ignore your own heart beating at the contact.

"Better?"

"A little." He admits. He loves holding you, and sure, it helps his nerves, but he's going to tell you.

His Mum's been on him since he told her you'd be staying with him, telling him “now or never, Harry!”, and he's beginning to realize it really is now or never. He doesn't know how long quarantine will keep up or how much longer you will decide to stay, and he misses you even when you're just running something as simple as a grocery trip.

He doesn't know why he's scared, he knows a friendship as strong as yours could work through anything, Still, there's always the possibility that things could go bad. “Get out of your head!'”Anne would say.

This type of topic between the two of you is quite common, given Harry's music and your tendency to be quite open. However, this type of topic concerning the two of you is uncharted territory.

He thinks about the story you'd brought up earlier. When you'd both went to a party together and some guy, very obviously drunker than the both of you, tried to flirt his way into your pants before Harry had pushed him into the pool himself.

The truth is, he knew you would hold your ground if you weren't interested. Actually, Harry knows from first-hand experience that you don't need protection, you can be very vocal when you need to be, and he's even seen you deck someone at the bar a few years back for touching one of your friends. You were the protector.

That's why, upon seeing Harry at such a nervous loss of words, you had hugged him. It was your own way of protecting him.

"I wasn't trying t'protect you when I pushed that guy into the pool." He states, quiet and unsure.

You only hum in reply, allowing him to finish his sentence but letting him know you heard what he said.

" 'was jealous."

What?

"What?" you pull away from him only slightly, “why?"

"I didn't want stupid—" he pauses for the name "Josh, or whatever, t'be the one to take y'home."

You give him a confused look, now that you can see his face. Not putting two and two together.

"Josh is great! I love Josh—"

"More than me?" he murmurs, and it clicks.

Oh.

"Of course not... Harry," you hesitate, watching his eyes move between your own and his jaw clench.

Is this happening?

"I wanted," his shaky hand finds your arm, sliding down to take hold of your own, equally shaky left hand to toy with your fingers.

"I wanted t'take you home. Crawl into bed with you. Whatever else." he finishes. His stomach is in butterflies by now and he feels the tight, anxiety feeling in his lungs.

It catches him completely off guard when your lips are on his.

When you try to pull away, scared you've overstepped, his mouth only follows your own and his hand rises to your jaw to hold you steady. He feels a weight lifted from his shoulders, holding you, kissing you, like this. This is what he's needed.

When you finally do pull away, it's to go inside. Harry erupts in happy laughter when you make a beeline up the stairs. Nothing happens though, it's too soon and Harry agrees, but that doesn't stop you from curling into Harry's sheets, cuddling and kissing each other while watching one of your favourite films.

Catching up on missed time.

***

The wedding reception.

How did we end up here?

"Honestly," Harry speaks loudly to the crowd of your family and friends within the dinner hall "I have two people to thank for sealing the deal."

You smile wildly, knowing exactly which story he's about to bring up. Your eyes travel through the table groups you and Harry had spent so much time planning out. When your eyes catch with Mitch's he gives you a wink.

"Anne, my beautiful Mother, thank you for not letting me coward out of finally telling my girl how I felt," he pauses, you place a hand on his knee

"And Josh—"

You can't hold back the laugh, especially when the entire room turns to face the poor, completely unsuspecting victim. Josh, face red and confused smile on his lips.

"Years ago, when I pushed you into that pool at your birthday party because— you would've killed me if I didn't run! Because you were talking to her and I got jealous!" the room is erupting in laughter.

The room is full of the most important people in your's and Harry's lives. Still though, your happy eyes are glued to Harry, working the small crowd of people as per usual and telling a story about the time of and before quarantine; of when you'd basically moved in with him and never left.

Later, when you're wrapped in warm blankets and Harry's arms, you're reflecting on your day. The guests, who you'd talked to, what you'd heard.

"Wow. I'm married." he dumbfounds.

Wow is right.

"We're married." you restate for him, giving his hand a soft squeeze.

"Wow. I'm married to my best friend.”

Giggles boil over in the dark room. Harry is astonished suddenly, pupils blown, wide grin on his face. He presses quick kisses to the side of your face and you snuggle into his side more.

"I think we win, H."

#i feel like this was sorta rushed but hskdjsks it’s fine #can you tell i love the zane lowe interview #harry styles #harry styles x reader #harry styles fluff #fineline #harry styles x y/n #harry styles imagine #harry styles friends to lovers #harry styles marriage #request #not edited

[watchyourbluesturngolden]

go big or go home

this was a request from @kk2016

Hi!! could you write about being pregnant with Harry but no one knew so you guys show up to the Grammys together and everyone can see your baby bump through your dress?

here is the link to the dress you’re wearing. I have no idea if this is a good option, I’m terrible with fashion :) but I thought it was cute! If you hate it, definitely just imagine something else :)

warnings: pregnancy

word count: 2.8k

It wasn't exactly hard to hide a pregnancy during a pandemic. You barely left the house, and if you did, you weren't recognized. The one time you and Harry had been spotted, you had only been 4 months along and were wearing an oversized sweater. So it was safe to say this baby was your family's little secret.

Harry knew, of course. He had been the first person to know (after Anne and the doctor who confirmed the pregnancy). You had got around to telling the rest of your families after the first trimester was over. The "inner circle," as you liked to call it, were the few people who were aware. This consisted of your parents, Anne, Gemma, Harry's band, Jeff and Glenne. That was it. Neither of you were wild on the idea of Harry's entire fanbase knowing, so you kept it under wraps as best you could.

Which, once again, wasn't hard to do. You didn't even have to go out for groceries; they could be delivered. You could buy everything for the nursery online and have it sent directly to your front doorstep. You and Harry had stayed inside for the better part of the past seven months.

However, there was one event coming up that you absolutely refused miss out on. The Grammys. At first, Harry thought you should stay home. He was worried you would get sick, and how it might affect the baby. He was worried about his fans finding out. He was worried he wouldn't win and he would have to see your disappointed face right next to him.

Of course, you were not about to let this happen. You assured him you wouldn't get within six feet of anyone besides him. You wouldn't shake anyone's hand or hug anyone. You would wear two masks, if it would make him feel safer. You would shower in hand sanitizer. You really didn't care what you had to do; you were not going to miss this night.

"Harry, I swear to God, if you keep giving me that terrified look..."

"I'm sorry!" He exclaimed, dragging a hand over his face. "I'm allowed to be a little apprehensive. This really isn't a good idea, I think it might be best if you just stay home. I just-"

"Absolutely not," you spun around, placing your hands on your hips. "I'm going to be there, in person, so I can watch my husband become a Grammy winner."

"You can watch from here!" He argued. "Plus, that way, you don't have to walk around all night. I know your feet have been bugging you, and-"

"Don't use this pregnancy against me!" You threw your head back, taking a deep breath.

"I'm sorry, I'm not," he said, stepping closer and resting his hands on your belly. "I just want you to be safe. You and our little girl."

"I know," you brought up your hand to brush along his cheekbone. "And we will be. I'm not going to get close to anyone. I'm not going to touch anything. I'm going to have two masks on the entire night. Harry, there won't be anyone safer than me this whole night. I promise."

"I just..."

When he didn't finish his sentence, you leaned in to meet his eyes. "What are you really worried about?"

"Lots of things," he murmured. "Besides the literal plague? I'm worried about people finding out and being cruel. I don't want to deal with that, and I don't ever want you to be exposed to it. I'm worried something bad will happen, and it'll be all my fault for letting you come along. And... I'm worried you'll be disappointed if I don't win." His last sentence was so quiet you barely heard it, but it still made your heart ache.

"Baby..." You said quietly, your voice sad. You ignored his other two worries for now, because this one was clearly the most important to deal with. “You think I'll be disappointed in you?"

He nodded, looking at his hands on you instead of meeting your eyes. "Everything I do, it's all for you. You and her. What if it's not enough? What if I fail?"

"Harry," you kept your hands on his face, directing him to look at you. "I will never, ever be disappointed in you. You are amazing, in everything you do. Understand? I personally think you will be a three time Grammy winner at the end of the night-" he grinned at this- "But even if you're not, I will still be so incredibly proud of you. I will always, always be proud of you, and I will always love you. Okay?"

He didn't move, but you used your grip on his face to nod his head up and down. His smile grew bigger, and he grabbed your wrist gently. He turned his head to kiss your palm, sighing softly before he pulled away.

"I love you so much," he said, his voice filled with admiration. "How do you do that?"

"Do what?"

"Make me feel better. You always know exactly what to say."

You shrugged with a small smile. "I'm just amazing, I think."

"I think so too."

-----

You were sitting on the couch, dressed in your normal quarantine clothing. Hoodies. Sweatpants for him, leggings for you. Why would you get dressed up for a virtual acceptance ceremony?

You bounced excitedly as they announced "Adore You" as one of the nominations for best music video. Harry smiled when you gripped his arm.

"I don't have a good feeling about this," he admitted.

"Well, you're just a ray of sunshine today," you huffed. "Here it comes!"

"And the Grammy goes to... Beyoncé, Blue Ivy, and WizKid."

You slumped back slightly, patting his arm.

He laughed lightly at your reaction. "She deserves it."

You nodded. "Not to be mean to you, but yeah, she definitely does."

-----

As the hours wore on, you could tell Harry was getting more nervous.

"It's just- it's my first performance in a while. What if it's not good?"

"Harry," you grabbed his face again. "It will be amazing. Yes?"

Again, he didn't respond. Again, you had to physically move his head up and down in a nod. Again, this made him laugh. It was a small gesture, but you could tell it helped calm him down at least a little bit.

"There's one thing we haven't talked about," he pulled away from you, going through his drawers to find his socks.

"What's that?"

"Your outfit."

You shook your head. "I already picked my dress." You pulled out the garment bag, unzipping it to show him. It was fairly simple; you didn't want to overshadow him on his big day.

He smiled. "It's beautiful."

You nodded. "We're going to look so hot together."

"Couple of the year, I think."

"We might break the internet. Seriously. You're wearing a leather jacket with no shirt and I'm pregnant. Twitter is going to explode."

He laughed again, pulling you into his arms. "Are you sure you're ok with everyone knowing? It might not be good, people's reactions can be really-"

"You do realize they will have to find out at some time, right? You can't exactly hide a child forever."

"I know," he sighed. "I just like living in our little bubble, where it's only me and you who know."

"And your mom. And Gemma. And my parents. And Sarah, and Mitch, and Adam, and Ny, and Charlotte, and Jeff and-"

"Alright, alright, you've made your point," he chuckled. "But you know what I mean."

"I do," you nodded. "And I'm ok with people knowing. Besides, it'll blow over soon. I can just stay off socials until it does."

Harry sighed again. "I wish you didn't have to. I wish people would just..."

"Treat people with kindness," you grinned. "Maybe they don't know. Maybe you should tell them to do that sometime."

He rolled his eyes playfully, pulling away from you. "You're funny."

"Hilarious, I know."

"I have to get ready," he sighed. "One last try- are you sure you don't want to stay home?"

"Not a chance," you smiled. "Now shoo so I can get dressed."

-----

His hands were shaking as he opened the door of his dressing room. You gripped his arm tighter, trying to remind him you were here for him.

"Everything's going to be ok," you said softly.

He nodded, but his hands still shook.

"I'll be right offstage, you can look at me if you get nervous," you reminded him. "This might not be the time, but I'm, like, really excited to see you perform."

"Yeah?" He gave a small smile.

You nodded. "It's been a while since I've been able to see that. And you look... very nice in this outfit."

"Very nice, huh?" He laughed. "What a compliment."

"I do have a way with words," you grinned.

"Always," he leaned his forehead against yours. "Now what was it you said earlier? Shoo, so I can get dressed."

"I'll be just offstage," you reminded him one last time, blowing him a kiss as you stepped out of the room.

-----

You couldn't take your eyes off him for the entire performance. He was worried for no reason, because he was incredible. He was born to do this, you could tell.

You cheered louder than anyone else when he finished, earning a cheeky smile from him. As soon as he could get away, he ran over to you and enveloped you in his arms.

"I told you you'd be amazing," you whispered.

He nodded, wearing the biggest smile you'd seen in days. "Couldn't have done it without you."

"I didn't do anything," you laughed.

"No, I couldn't have done it without your moral support," he clarified.

"Right, moral support," you nodded seriously before breaking into a smile again. "But really, that was amazing. You're perfect."

"That's all you, love," he returned the compliment, turning back around to watch Billie performing. He kept his arm around you, though. The camera panned to you a few times during the different performances, and you knew by this point the viewers at home had seen your bump. Your dress wasn't very tight fitting, but you were almost 8 months along. You were sure social media was exploding by now.

You didn't have to worry about that though, not yet at least. You had a few more hours of calm.

-----

Harry's nerves had apparently returned once you got to the table. His hand was gripping yours even tighter than before and his leg bounced constantly. You placed your hand on his thigh, trying to calm his frantic movements. His eyes went to yours, and you could tell he was smiling under his mask.

"It will be fine," you reminded him. "Everything will be ok. You already did the hard part, remember?"

He nodded, taking in a deep breath. "Right. And soon, we can go home, and sit on the couch, and eat ice cream."

"Exactly," you smiled. "And I can get back in my leggings and not get dressed again for the next 6 months."

He laughed at this, and his grip on your hand loosened. He still kept hold of you, but you could tell he wasn't so nervous anymore.

"Ok, shh, they're announcing it now," you said excitedly.

Harry looked down, apparently seized with nerves again.

"And the Grammy goes to... Watermelon Sugar, Harry Styles."

His eyes went wide, and your face split into a giant grin. He reached his arm out to grab yours, almost like he didn't believe what had just happened.

He pulled his mask off, standing up. He took your hand, gesturing for you to stand too, so of course you obliged. He pulled you against him, and you could feel how fast his heart was beating. When he pulled away, you smiled up at him.

"I knew you would win," you said softly, still beaming. "Now go!" You gave his shoulder a gentle push toward the stage.

"Wow, um..." He blew out a breath, looking at you before he spoke again. "To everyone who made this record with me, thank you so much. This was the first song we wrote after my first album came out, during a day off in Nashville, and I just want to say thanks to Tom, Tyler, Mitch, and everyone... Rob Stringer, and everyone at Colombia, my manager Jeffery, who has always nudged me to be better and never pushed me, thank you so much. I feel very grateful to be here, thank you. All of these songs are fucking massive, so thank you so much, I feel very honored to be here among all of you, so thank you so much. And I want to say-" he looked at you again, a smile of adoration crossing his face. "Most importantly, thank you to my wife. Y/N, I love you more than anything else on this planet, and I couldn't have done any of this without you. You make it all possible, so... thank you to the light of my life, and of course our daughter." His eyes went wide at the last sentence, like he hadn't planned to say that. He looked around nervously before he quickly made his way back to his seat.

"I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to say that, it slipped out-"

You shook your head, taking his hand. "It's ok, don't worry about it," you smiled. "I'm so proud of you."

He put his mask back on, but it didn't hide the happiness on his face.

-----  

Once everything was over and you had both climbed into the car to go home, it seemed to really hit him.

"I won a Grammy," he said in disbelief, looking down at the award in his hands.

"You won a Grammy," you repeated with a big smile on your face. "Grammy winner Harry Styles."

"Yeah," he looked back up at you, his eyes still wide. "That's... insane."

You nodded. "And very impressive. And I'm so proud of you."

He smiled, scooting closer so he could put his arm around you. "Grammy winner Harry Styles... and his amazing wife."

"And their amazing daughter," you added, placing his other hand over your stomach. "Feel that? She's been kicking all night. She's excited for you."

He grinned, before his face dropped back into one of concern. "Are you sure you're ok with what I said? I really didn't mean to, I just got caught up, it-"

"Baby," you stopped him. "I promise, it's ok. Besides, everyone knew the minute I walked in there."

"Right," he nodded. "Has your phone been blowing up?"

You shrugged. "I turned it off. Should we check?"

"I'm a little nervous," he admitted.

"I'm gonna do it." You fished your phone out of your purse, eyes widening when you saw how many notifications you had. From every possible app. Congratulations texts, excited DMs, missed calls, and then there were the mentions. There were well over a hundred on your lockscreen alone.

You cleared all of them, deciding to open Twitter and see how bad it was. You were very pleasantly surprised.

"harry's daughter" was #1 on the trending page, and "harry in leather" was right behind it. Clicking on the first one, you found several GIFs of the terrified look on Harry's face when he accidentally made the announcement. You smiled, but scrolled further. Hundreds of fans were typing in all caps, apparently very excited that Harry was going to be a father.

"You're right, we broke the internet," he grinned, looking through his own timeline. "I've seen my bare chest more in the last five minutes than my entire life before this."

"What a power couple we are," you laughed. "We got the top two trending spots."

"What an accomplishment," he joked.

You scrolled for a few more minutes, still yet to see a negative message. "You were worried for nothing, babe. They're all very excited for us."

"I see that," he grinned. "They've also named our baby for us, and somehow know her zodiac sign."

"Oh, wonderful," you laughed. "But really, it could have been worse."

"Definitely," he nodded. "Well, that's one way to announce a pregnancy. On live TV in front of the entire nation."

"Yeah, you know, go big or go home."

"Exactly."

Closing Twitter, you moved on to Instagram. You gasped when you saw the first picture on your feed. "Sarah posted her bump! Now we can be baby buddies in public, not just in secret."

Harry smiled, turning off his phone and pulling you closer to him.

"omg, baby buddies :)" you commented. Within seconds, Sarah had liked the comment and replied with "they will be best friends😊"

With that, you turned off your own device and leaned into his side. "What a good night. Aren't you glad I came with you?"

"I am," he admitted. "Very glad. Thanks for being stubborn."

"Always."

#harry styles #harry fanfiction #harry styles x reader #harry styles x you #harry styles x you fanfiction #harry styles x reader fanfiction #harry styles x y/n #harry styles/you #harry styles/reader #harry styles/reader fanfiction #harry styles/you fanfiction #dad!harry #one direction #one direction fanfiction #pregnancy

[nothingbutimagines]

Everything You Want (Peter Parker)

Pairing: Peter Parker x Reader

Warning: Cursing, lots of fluff and cliches

Summary: When Y/n breaks up with her ex, she declares to her friends that she will never, by any means, fall in love again. To her surprise, Peter seems to take this as a challenge, trying to win her heart in a mere afternoon.  

Author: Dizzy

A/N: I was on a bit of an unexpected hiatus, but I am here to stay. School and quarantine was kicking my ass and my family is moving halfway across the country so things have been very hectic around here. But, with Falcon and the Winter Solider and me rewatching all the Marvel movies to cope with this wack ass time, I am feeling inspired.

Masterlist Request Any Of These Peter Parker/Tom Holland Masterlist

__________________

“That’s it!” You slammed your lunch tray down on the cafeteria table as you huffed and sat down beside MJ. “I’m done with men. I hate love. I’m over it.”

MJ looked over at you and sighed, rolling her eyes. She didn’t believe you, especially since the boy you’d broken up with was the boy you dated not even a week after swearing off men the last time. 

“What are you talking about?” Ned asked before receiving a swift kick from MJ.

“Don’t ask about it.” The girl replied through gritted teeth as she fully turned on the bench to face you. “Y/n, you know I love you, but I can’t help but think you’re being a little rash.”

“Rash?” You scoffed. “You wanna talk about rash? MJ, you broke up with Ethan Brooks in eighth grade because he accidentally stepped on your foot at the winter formal.”

“I know you’re just being harsh because you’re heartbroken, but let’s be real, Y/n, you don’t hate love.” 

“Yes, yes I do. I’m never, ever, ever going to fall in love. I’m not even going to think about it. I now will live in a world of tragedy and heartbreak because love does not exist.”

You stabbed your fork into your mac and cheese aggressively. Maybe MJ was right, you thought, you might have been being a little harsh and you were very heartbroken. 

You had the unfortunate curse of being a romantic, loving the idea of love and anything having to do with a good rom-com. You couldn’t help but fall in love with everyone you’d ever had a romantic moment with. You just loved the experience that came with being in love. 

However, now sitting heartbroken and eating your feelings in mac and cheese, you really really didn’t like the idea of falling in love and would have rather fallen off the face of the earth than like another boy.

MJ sighed heavily, reading your body language and knowing you wanted nothing more than to curl up in bed and watch a sad movie. 

“Y/n, I know you’re sad, but look on the bright side, you have more time to hang out with us. We’re going to the movies after school today.” 

You looked between your three friends, smiling shyly. “Thanks, guys, but I really just feel like being alone.”

“Oh, come on, Y/n.” Peter sighed, giving you a nudge with his foot. “I know you secretly want to pig out on popcorn and see that new horror movie.” 

“I don’t think so, Peter. I really don’t feel good.” 

Peter pouted, giving you puppy dog eyes. “Please, Bug, come on. You blew me off last week to go out with Brad and we’re best friends. You owe me one.” 

“I thought we were best friends.” Ned spoke up, earning another swift kick from Peter. “Ow! What is with you guys and abusing me?” 

You smiled, rolling your eyes at your friends. Especially at Peter, who seemed serious enough to use the only face you couldn’t resist and a nickname that always seemed to keep your attention on him. 

“I’ll think about it.” You caved, taking another bite of your food. 

“Don’t think. Just say yes.” 

“Are you seriously going to be pushy right now, Parker?” You raised a brow at him. “I am heartbroken. Sick with sadness.” 

“I’m just saying, the best way to get over someone-”

“Is to get under someone.” Ned stated proudly, cutting Peter off. 

“Ew, no!” Peter gave Ned a light shove. “I was going to say that the best way to get over someone is to be around people who care about you.”

“Or burning his personal belongings before he asks for them back.” MJ added, stealing a fork full of your mac and cheese. “We could always burn Brad’s stuff and roast marshmallows over it.” 

“I like MJ’s idea way better than going to the movies.” You agreed, pointing to the girl beside you while you locked eyes with Peter.

“We’re not going to burn his stuff!” Peter exclaimed as MJ frowned. “I’m pretty sure it’s illegal to burn someone else’s property and we already made plans to go to the movie.”

“Well, damn.” You frowned. “Now look who’s being harsh.” 

MJ began to chuckle beside you as Peter began to frown. 

“Harsh would be me forcing you to go to the movie.”

“Oh yeah, and badgering me to go isn’t forcing me right, Peter?” You raised a brow at him as you finished the last of your meal. 

“At least I’m asking and not physically forcing you to go.”

“That is true.” You shrugged. “I guess I’ll come, but if I am having a terrible time, you have to take me home.”

“Always.” Peter smiled, nodding as he reached forward and grabbed your hand. “It’ll be fun, Bug. I swear.” 

You shrugged, squeezing the boy’s hand as the bell rang loudly. You pulled away quickly, catching a glance at your now ex-boyfriend and the girl attached to his arm as he walked past your table. You cleared your throat, corralling your things together as you rose from your spot on the bench. 

“I’ll-I’ll, uh, see you guys later. I’ve got to get to Chem. I can’t be late again or I’ll get a detention.” You stammered, feeling the tears prick at your eyes as you pulled your books in your arms. 

“Let me walk with you.” Peter offered, noticing the sudden change in your mood as he rose from his seat and rounded the table to where you stood. “I have to get to Bio next door anyway.”

You nodded silently, surprised when you felt Peter’s hand press lightly against the small of your back as he guided you through the crowd in silence. 

“You know, Bug, it’s okay to say things aren’t okay.” He finally said as you made it into the outer corridor of the cafeteria. 

You bit your lip at his words, holding back the tears as you glanced over at him so he could finally see your eyes and cheeks red with pent up feelings.

“I’m fine.” You choked out, swallowing the lump that formed in your throat. 

Peter pulled you aside, out of the way of the walking students. His eyes, you could see as he rested his hands on your shoulders and forced you to look at him, were full of concern.

“I know you’re not. You want to talk about it?”

You couldn’t help it, the warmth and care in his brown eyes caused your tears to begin to fall as your hand shot up to wipe them quickly.

“You must think I’m pathetic.” You laughed uncomfortably as you spoke, “I’m crying over some stupid boy and you have to watch.”

Peter shook his head, his expression clearly showing the confusion in his mind as he looked at you. 

He never found you pathetic nor would he ever. On the contrary, he found you to be the most amazing person he’d had ever known, and not just because you were best friends. Watching you cry, he realized something he’d never wanted to take a good hard look at. 

You were the girl he’d always wanted to be with and you’d always kept him on the sidelines. You were everything he’d ever wanted and yet you always kept him as the best friend, the shoulder to cry on, the boy who often kept you afloat. 

For a girl so in love with romance and cliches, you’d never realized how much of a walking cliche the two of you were. 

Not that Peter was upset. He would never be upset by that, especially when you still allowed for him to be so close by your side. 

“Oh, Y/n.” He pulled you into a hug after giving you a moment to clean yourself up. “I would never think you were pathetic. You’re the best person I know.” 

You sniffed, bringing your arms around him to embrace him back before pulling away and looking up at him. 

“You really think so?”

“I know so.” He gave you a shy smile as he glanced down at you.

Your eyes traveled from gazing into his and looking to the spot on his shirt that you had now stained with tears and mascara.

“Even if I stained your nice white shirt with my make up?”

Peter pulled away, looking down at the shoulder of his shirt as he tugged at it to see the stain better. He sighed, chuckling lightly as he looked at you with a smile as warm as the look in his eyes. 

“I have other shirts. I didn’t really like this one, anyway.” 

“Peter, that’s your favorite one.” 

Peter shrugged, letting go of the fabric between his fingers as he looked at you, wiping away the last remaining tear that clung to your cheekbone. “I’ll just have to find a new favorite then.”

You swallowed a bit, your hand reaching up and resting on his wrist as you smiled shyly, sudden feeling nervous. 

“I should probably get to class.” You said softly, your voice barely above a whisper. 

Peter’s hand fell from your face quickly as he became aware of the new energy between you two. 

“Yeah, yeah.” He cleared his throat harshly. “I should get going too.”

You nodded, allowing for silence to fall between you two as you quickly rushed to class, giving him a small wave before walking into the classroom. 

The rest of the day felt uneventful and monotone with spurts of sadness and confusion here and there. You could feel the heartache of your breakup settle in every once in a while, especially in moments in which you let your mind wander while watching your ex-boyfriend now flirt with the girl beside him.

When your mind wasn’t wandering with thoughts of pain and heartbreak, it was full of thoughts of Peter and the moment you shared in the hallway. 

It wasn’t that you’d never had a moment like that with Peter before, you’d had plenty of moments in which he comforted you while you were upset and visa versa. You were best friends, of course you’d have your fair share of comforting moments, such as the time when you spent a week at Peter’s house after his uncle passed away. 

However, while you sat in class with your pen between your lips as you watched and counted down the minutes to the bell ringing,  you couldn’t shake the feeling that that moment in the hallway meant something more to you. 

As the bell finally rang, you practically ran out of the classroom and into the hall, only to run into the person you were looking for. 

You feel backwards and onto the floor, slightly shocked by your bottom hitting the ground as Peter’s hand shot out towards you as he bent over. 

“Shit, Y/n, you okay?” He asked as you grabbed his hand and allowed for him to help you up. 

You dusted yourself off before picking up your bag. “Yeah, I’m fine.” 

“What were you running for?”

“I was, uh, looking for you. We’re supposed to go to a movie, right?”

Peter nodded, starting to walk towards the front entrance of the school, his hands shoved into his pockets as you walked closely beside him. 

“Are you feeling better?” He asked after the silence between you felt too heavy for him to bear. 

“I don’t know.” You shrugged. “I don’t know how I could really feel better while having to see my newly ex flirt with another girl not even 24 hours after our breakup.”

“I’m sorry, Bug.”

“It’s not your fault.” You shrugged, kicking a rock that sat on the sidewalk in front of you. “He can do what he wants. He’s a single man now.” 

“I wouldn’t call him much of a man.” Peter admitted, taking a look in your direction.

You kicked the rock again as you approached it, watching it bounce and tumble down the sidewalk and into the grass. 

“Are MJ and Ned going to meet us at the theater or what’s the plan?” You asked, trying to derail the conversation from the topic you had no interest in rehashing.

Peter pulled a hand from his pocket and rubbed the back of his neck before putting it back in his pocket. He should’ve known you’d ask about the other two people who were supposed to be in attendance to your evening out. 

“MJ had to go to detention since she’s behind on her sketchbook work for art class. You know how she is, likes to draw people in detention for whatever reason. And Ned went home sick after lunch. He made the mistake of eating the meatloaf.” He lied, surprised he thought of something believable off the top of his head. 

In reality, he paid MJ twenty dollars to refrain from going to the movie and to lie about her whereabouts, something she never had trouble at doing, and he promised Ned that he’d spend the rest of the weekend helping him build another Star Wars lego model even though Peter wanted to grow out of the habit of playing with legos. 

You frowned a bit, having hoped you could’ve had some much needed girl time with MJ and wanting the funny commentary and banter of Ned during a movie that would normally terrify you. 

“Oh. Well, that sucks, but it’s okay. At least we’re still going together.” You raised your frown into a slight smile. 

Silence fell between you once again, leaving the only audible sound to be the wind and your heels hitting the ground in unison as you walked towards the movie theater. 

“Don’t worry about paying tonight. It’s my treat.” Peter stated as the theater came into view on the horizon. 

“Oh, Peter, you don’t have to.” 

“No, I want to. Just let me treat you to a night out. I feel bad that you’ve been having a rough day, so it’s the least I could do.”

You reached out and grabbed his arm, stopping him in his tracks before you engulfed him into a hug with your arms tight around his neck and your perfume filling his nostrils. 

“Peter Parker, you are truly my best friend and the love of my life.” You announced proudly, not realizing that the words warmed Peter in a way he’d never experienced before.

“I love you too, Y/n, but I cannot breathe with you choking me out like this.” He said softly, pretending to wheeze as you pulled away, giving him a shove.

“You are so dramatic.” You chuckled, starting to walk down the sidewalk once again. 

“I’m dramatic?” Peter scoffed as he jogged to keep up with you. “Aren’t you the theater nerd?”

“Doesn’t mean you’re not also a drama queen.” 

“I’ll have you know, I am very good at keeping my cool.”

“Tell that to Flash Thompson and your little rivalry.”

“Flash is an asshole.” 

“I’m not saying he isn’t,” you argued, “all I’m saying is that you get a bit dramatic with him. I like to think he’s secretly in love with you.” 

“Ew, gross.” Peter shook his head. “Flash is the last person I’d want a dramatic romance with.” 

“I think Flash is the last person anyone wants to have a romance with.” You laughed.

Peter was glad that it seemed your spirits were lifting as you finally made it to the theater. He could feel his own spirits lifted by your bettering mood which left him not needing to worry as much. 

He didn’t know whether it was the elation in mood he was feeling between the two of you or the instinctive urge to keep you close and protected that had him reaching for your hand as he opened the door to the theater to let you in first, but as you walked through the corridor, he grabbed it without thought or hesitation. 

You didn’t know what possessed him to grab your hand either, but you found yourself refraining from questioning it, wanting to feel the warmth and caring touch of someone else. Though your spirits were lifted a bit, you still felt lonely deep down. 

“Are you okay?” Peter asked, glancing down at you as he grabbed the tickets from the girl at the ticket counter and began to guide you towards the snack bar. 

You nodded, unsure of what to say as Peter continued to watch you closely. You held your breath, suddenly nervous with his eyes on you before you were saved by his eyes travelling to view the menu far above your head. 

“I’m thinking we get a large popcorn and two sodas.” He thought out loud as you frowned. “Unless, that’s not what you want?”

You blinked, shaking your head quickly as you spoke. “No, no, sorry. I got lost in thought. That sounds fine. I’m not that hungry, though.” 

“How are you not hungry? You ate two bites of mac and cheese at lunch and then pushed it around on your tray.”

You shrugged, pulling your hand from his and crossing your arms over your chest. You were somewhat building up an appetite, but every time you did, you suddenly felt sick by your own intrusive thoughts about your heartache and break up with a boy you knew you shouldn’t have been crying over. 

“I guess I’m not really in the mood to eat too much.” You finally said. 

“Well, I’m still getting the large and if you ask for any, I won’t give you some. You already said no.” Peter teased. 

“Oh, you would never say no to me.” 

“You wanna bet?” Peter raised a brow as you reached the front of the short line. 

“I’ll bet you a bag of overpriced M&M’s.” 

“I thought you weren’t hungry.” 

“I am always hungry for M&M’s.”

Peter smiled with a light eye roll. “Alright, but you can’t eat any until we determine who won.” 

“Deal.” 

You smiled as he turned away from you, ordering your snacks and you began taking each one from him before he carried the popcorn and his drink and you carried your own drink and the bag of M&M’s you were so excited to win. You watched your feet fall to the ground to his in unison as you two stayed silent, trying to navigate the hallway for the theater your movie was in.

“Hey, Peter?” You caught the boy’s attention as he walked through the open door of your theater, a fistful of popcorn in his hand as he looked at you. 

“Yeah?” He began walking backwards as he faced you and tossed the popcorn into his mouth.

“Can I have some popcorn?” 

“Yeah, sure.” He nodded as he spoke through his mouthful of popcorn and held the bucket out to you. 

You began laughing, taking a few pieces of popcorn and popping them into your mouth. 

“Why are you laughing?” Peter asked as you were giggling beside him now following him up the stairs of the theater before looking down at his bucket. “Oh. I guess you can have those M&M’s after all.” 

“We just made this bet! How’d you forget already?” You chuckled, walking past him and into an aisle, picking the perfect seat in the middle of the theater. 

“I-I don’t know! I got so involved in the popcorn I forgot.” 

“I guess that’s one way of saying you want to marry a food item.” You teased as he rolled his eyes and took a seat beside you. 

“You know, I’m not going to get mad cause you’re going through it, but when you’re over it, I will get you back for this.” 

“How? You’re already a victim of premature Alzheimer’s. You won’t remember this by the time I get a new boyfriend.”

You reached over, grabbing a handful of popcorn and beginning to eat the pieces one by one as you watched Peter closely. 

“You know, sometimes I hate you.” 

“No, you don’t.” 

“How would you know?”

“Cause you don’t even have a mean bone in your body. Flash bullies you mercilessly and you don’t even say anything back.” 

“Is that a bad thing?”

“No.” You shook your head. “It makes you a good guy. And we need good guys in this world.”

“You think I’m a good guy?”  Peter raised his brow as you nodded wildly at him.

“Of course I do.” You leaned over, placing a hand on his. “You’re not just a good guy, but a guy too good for this world, you know? You deserve the world, but the world doesn’t deserve you.” 

Peter leaned in close to you. “Sorry, I don’t think I heard that.” 

You could feel your breath hitch as he leaned in, his face a few mere inches from yours. It wasn’t that you were scared, but nervous at your excitement at the thought of him kissing you. 

Peter could feel your anxious energy as he leaned in close, the urge to kiss you in the way he’d always wanted to growing strong as he moved his head so your lips were lined up to his ear. It wasn’t that he wanted to kiss you, but he didn’t want to take advantage of your loneliness in that moment. 

You leaned in close to his ear, your nostrils now full of his shampoo as you spoke softly. “I said that I thought you were such a great guy that you deserve the world, but the world doesn’t deserve you.” 

“You mean that?” He answered back, his voice as soft as your own.

He did dare lean back or move his head from the position it was in for fear that he’d kiss you so soon. The words you were saying were ones he always wanted you to say, but never thought would come out. He wanted to be everything you ever wanted, but your words now felt somewhat short yet so close to that sentiment. 

“Of course I do.” You replied, your own urge to kiss him rising steadfast in the back of your mind. 

You couldn’t tell if it was your loneliness or the sudden dimming of the theater lights that had you realizing that all you wanted was to cross the line of friendship with Peter, a line you never realized was made to be crossed when it came to your friendship. 

Every touch, every sweet nothing, every thing about him you loved began to swirl around in your mind as you pulled away from him and gazed into his eyes before planting your lips on his, pushing him back into the armrest of his seat. 

Peter was shocked by the gesture as he leaned into the kiss, his hands resting on your cheeks before you pulled away from him breathlessly. 

“Y/n, I-”

“Peter.” You cut him off before giggling. “Go ahead.” 

“Bug, I don’t want you to think I’m taking advantage of you and your feelings about your breakup even though I really like you and-” 

You cut the boy off with another kiss, not wanting to hear what he had to say. You knew he was going to give you some speech about how you might not know what your feeling and so on, but you didn’t care. You knew that you kissed him and you liked it and that it felt more right than any date with Brad. 

You pulled away, putting a hand over his mouth before he could speak as you began to instead. “Peter, I know how I feel. I like you too, okay? Now, can we just take advantage of the fact we’re some of the few people in here and just hang out?”

Peter nodded, pulling your hand off of him. “I think I’d like that.”

#peter parker #peter parker fanfic #peter parker imagine #peter parker x reader #peter parker fanfiction #spiderman #spiderman fanfiction #spiderman fanfic #spiderman imagine #spiderman x reader #tom holland!spiderman #tom holland #tom holland fanfic #tom holland imagines #tom holland imagine #tom holland x reader #peter parker imagines #spiderman imagines #marvel #marvel fanfic #marvel fanfiction #marvel imagines #marvel imagine

[nerdzzone]

-More Hearts Than Mine-

Summary: Raising a child is hard. Raising a child with one of Hollywood’s biggest stars is even harder. And raising a child with one of Hollywood’s biggest stars who you’re not actually in a relationship with is even harder still.

Especially when a global pandemic is sweeping the world.

With lockdowns and stay at home orders looming on the horizon, the uncertainty of their situation becomes almost too much for Whitney Taylor to handle. Chris suggests that they quarantine together to avoid any potential separations but, given what happened the last time they spent more than a few brief moments in each other’s company, that could cause more problems than it solves…

Chris Evans x OFC

Sequel to: Once Bitten - Twice Shy

Note: I’ve decided to make this five parts instead of four. I was originally going to combine this part and the next one, but I feel like it flows better with a bit of separation between them!

Part One

____

Part Two

The rest of our first afternoon together was spent lazing around. Grayson was tired, but continued to refuse his nap so we kept things low key to avoid any exhausted toddler meltdowns. By the time the evening rolled around, I was tired from the stress of the day myself and since I still had to unpack, I went up to my bedroom shortly after we'd tucked Grayson into bed.

I slept a lot better than I thought I would given everything that was on my mind and when I woke up, I could already hear the sounds of breakfast echoing up from the kitchen. Taking a few minutes to let myself wake up properly, I checked my phone and scrolled through social media before getting up, stretching and heading downstairs.

"Good morning," I smiled, finding Chris and Grayson sitting at the island eating some scrambled eggs while Scott leaned against the counter with a cereal bowl in his hands.

"G'morning, Mama!"

Grayson's greeting was said through a mouthful of food and Chris reminded him that wasn't polite before greeting me himself.

"Help yourself to whatever you want," he insisted. "There's some eggs left in the pan or cereal, whatever you can find. Maybe Grayson will even share his apple slices with you if you ask nicely."

Grayson gasped at that suggestion and frantically shook his head.

"No, Daddy!" He protested. "I don't want to share!"

I laughed as he reached over his plate to move the little bowl of sliced fruit closer to his body where he could keep it guarded.

"Not even one slice?" I asked. "But I'm so hungry!"

"Over there!" Grayson giggled, pointing at the counter.

I turned around and saw a few more apples in a bowl, making me smile as I turned back to the boys.

"But they're not nicely sliced like yours," I pointed out. "How can I eat those?"

Grayson shrugged and plucked one of his apples out of his bowl. He looked smug, thinking he'd won, but he was so distracted while he took a bite that he didn't see Chris' hand sneak over until he'd snatched one of the slices and tossed it to me.

"Catch!"

I did as Chris instructed and Grayson's jaw dropped. An indignant huff fell from his lips as he looked between the two of us.

"That's not nice."

Chris laughed, but I bit back a smile and returned his apple.

"You're right, baby," I agreed, kissing the top of your head. "That was mean, but we were just tricking you. You don't have to share your apple."

"Thanks, Mama."

The frown on his face turned back into a grin and I scraped the rest of the eggs that were in the pan on the stove onto a plate before turning back to the boys once I’d pulled a fork from the drawer.

"So, how do you want to work it with things like groceries while I'm here?"

"Just tell me what you want and I'll order it," Chris told me. "They've started doing curbside pick up pretty much everywhere so I was thinking I'd just do that."

"Oh, that's handy, but I meant like money wise. Should I just transfer you my share or do you want to alternate who pays?"

Chris stared at me for a moment as if he was trying to figure out if I was joking before he chuckled.

"I'm not taking any money from you, Whitney."

His voice was firm, but I furrowed my brow in confusion.

"What? Why not? I can't let you pay for everything."

"You're not still working, are you?" Scott asked. "Or is it different since, as a photographer, you're so far away from whoever you're taking pictures of?"

"I'm not working," I admitted. "I think it would be doable if it was, like, family portraits or something like that, but the big photo shoots involve too many people. Everyone cancelled on me last week or delayed my contracts until at least the summer."

"So, don't worry about paying for anything then," Chris shrugged. "It's not like you're going to eat that much, I think I can handle the cost."

He was trying to do a nice thing. He was a very generous person with those that he cared about, but I wasn't going to take advantage of him.

"I have savings, Chris," I insisted. "I'm not completely helpless."

As if sensing a rising tension, Scott put his bowl in the sink and grabbed his coffee mug before turning to Grayson.

"Hey, Gray, let's go see what cartoons we can find."

Grayson nodded eagerly and Chris helped him down from the tall stool so he could follow Scott out of the room, taking his little bowl of apples with him.

"I wasn't trying to imply that you're helpless," Chris assured me once they were out of earshot. "But you're tiny, I don't think that buying you a few groceries for the next couple of months will financially cripple me."

I tried to temper my defensiveness before I answered him, reminding myself again that he was trying to be helpful.

"I know that, but I don't feel comfortable living here for that long without contributing," I told him. "You already give me more than you need to every month for Grayson."

It was true. Since our custody agreement was that Grayson spent fifty percent of his time with each of us, he wasn't required to pay me any child support. But he did anyway. It was something we’d argued about on and off over the years because the amount that he gave me was way over the top. I appreciated his generosity and I did use all the money to buy things for Gray, but most of it ended up in a bank account that I'd opened for him because there was no way to spend it all in one month without Grayson becoming the most spoiled child in all of Massachusetts.

"I like to make sure he's taken care of."

"Which I am capable of doing with my own money when he's in my care," I reminded him. "But I don't want to start that whole conversation again. I just want to feel like I'm doing my part while I stay with you."

"And I appreciate that gesture, but it won't be necessary," Chris insisted. "You can clean, you can cook, do anything like that to help out, but I won't accept any money, especially while you're not working."

I sighed as he stood up to put his plate in the dishwasher while I put mine on the counter, too distracted by our conversation to eat. I knew it would be a struggle to get him to agree to take money from me, but I wasn't ready to back down so I thought of a compromise and hoped he would accept.

"How about we drop it for now," I suggested. "But if this thing goes on for more than a couple of weeks, can we talk about it again?"

Chris paused and crossed his arms. I could tell that he wanted to argue, but I was relieved when he agreed.

"Alright," he nodded, hesitating for a moment before adding a stipulation to the deal. "But we're going to talk about your car too before you leave here."

"My car? What about my car?"

"Grayson told me that it's not working properly," Chris admitted. "He said it sounds angry sometimes and that you haven't gotten it checked out yet."

I rolled my eyes, guessing that was one of those 'secrets' that he mentioned.

"It's fine," I assured him. "It made a weird sound one time last week when I tried to start it, but it's still working. I was going to take it in, but then all this virus stuff happened and I didn't have chance."

"You need a new one," Chris informed me. "That one is getting old anyway. I'll take you car shopping when things reopen."

I laughed at the absurdity of that statement, but I could see the annoyance on his face at my reaction.

"You're not buying me a car, Chris. The one I have is perfectly fine and if it's not then I will take myself car shopping, thank you very much."

"Why do you get so defensive when I try to help you?" He asked, his eyes shifting into a glare. "I'm not going to accidentally think that you're in love with me just because you accept a nice gesture from me. I can take a hint, Whitney, I get it."

My jaw dropped and I couldn't hold back a disgruntled scoff at his insane change of topic.

"What are you even talking about? This has nothing to do with that," I argued. "I wouldn’t have accepted your invitation if I knew you were going to hold that over me and throw it in my face all the time."

“All the time? This is the first time I’ve mentioned it!”

“Yes, but I’ve not even been here for twenty-fours hours and you’ve already brought it up!”

Perhaps it was my harsh, snappy tone that did it or my very valid criticism of his low blow, but Chris' body language softened.

"I just don't get why you get so worked up when I'm trying to help you..."

"Because I don't need help, Chris," I explained. "I might not be Captain America rich, but I do just fine and I can take care of myself. I can buy my own groceries and if I really needed to, I could buy myself a new car. You throwing money at me for things like that makes me feel like you don't value the success I've had in my career or my ability to manage my finances which is, quite frankly, offensive."

Chris dropped his arms so they were no longer crossed and his shoulders relaxed. Clearly, he'd been getting quite defensive as well and had realized it, whether he would admit it or not. I held my head high, proud of myself for explaining my feelings so well and taking him down a notch, but that feeling disappeared as soon as Chris spoke.

"If you were the richest woman in the world, I would still want to buy you a car," Chris started, looking more nervous than the dismissive, self-assured attitude I was getting moments ago. "I'd still want to buy you anything you could ever need because making you happy makes me happy."

My face fell at his confession and my heart clenched again, knowing what the underlying sentiment behind his statement was. It stung more than any hurtful words could have as the sincerity, the genuine care and appreciation, in his voice was heartbreaking. I regretted not adding a condition to our cohabitation that specified he wasn't allowed to say such nice, guilt inducing things as I stared at him for a moment, trying to think of a way to get out of this conversation that was more polite than just bolting out the door. 

Too much time was passing as his words hung between us so, short of any good comeback to his words, I shrugged.

"If you want to make me happy, let me contribute for the groceries."

It was Chris' turn to look shocked now, as he was obviously expecting a more thoughtful response to his rather vulnerable admission, but he pulled himself together quickly and a dry laugh fell from his lips.

"Nice try, Whitney," he smiled, shaking his head. "But that's not going to happen."

Without giving me any more time to argue, he turned on his heels and walked out the door leaving me alone to wallow in my guilt and wonder how much longer I'd be able to keep up my act of nonchalance.

-

There was a weird sense of restlessness in the house that day. Usually, killing a few days at home would be no big deal but, as soon as the stay at home orders came into place that morning, the knowledge that we were now unable to do anything else made it feel slightly more suffocating.

Chris wasn't lying though when he said that he planned to make this lockdown as enjoyable as possible so we managed to keep ourselves entertained as we planned out some of the things we could do. Chris and Scott were compiling a list of old movies they wanted to watch again, I ordered a bunch of puzzles and books (some more child appropriate and some for the adults), Chris dug out an old wiffle ball set he had from when they were kids and Scott organized Chris' video game collection, pulling out all the good ones like their favourite: Mario Kart.

By the end of the day, we were all feeling much more optimistic about how our time at home would go. Especially Grayson. It was finally starting to sink in for him that he got to spend the foreseeable future surrounded by all his favourite people - something that was unfortunately a rarity for him given our situation. He was bouncing off the walls as he threw his ideas into the mix and couldn't wait to get started on all the fun.

The excitement of the day led to another early night for him and I excused myself shortly after, declining the invitation to start practicing my Mario Kart skills.

After our conversation that morning, I was trying to keep a bit of distance from Chris. I wasn't mad and it didn't seem like he had any lasting feelings of annoyance either, but our earlier discussion proved to me that there was still tension and resentment between us. I wanted to let it settle and give him some space so our small disagreement didn't turn into a full-blown argument. Living together after everything we'd been through would be an adjustment period and easing into it would probably be the safest route.

So, I took myself off to my bedroom and lounged in bed watching some new mystery show on Netflix. I started it thinking it would just be a good way to pass a few hours until a reasonable time to go to bed but as usual with Netflix, I got sucked in and before I knew it, it was almost midnight.

I closed my laptop, knowing I needed to get some sleep as Grayson was an early riser, but I noticed the glass of water I'd taken upstairs with me hours ago was empty and my mouth was dry. With a sigh, I dragged myself out of bed, taking the glass to the kitchen to fill it up.

I crept down the stairs, assuming everyone would be in bed already, but I was surprised when I got to the kitchen to see the light on. I poked my head into the room and saw Scott sitting at the little island in the middle of the room, a drink in his hand and a melancholy look on his face.

"Hey," I greeted him, alerting him to my presence. "You're up late..."

"I was just FaceTiming with my boyfriend. He's in LA so it worked with the time difference."

"Boyfriend?" I questioned as I headed over to the sink to fill up my glass. "I didn't know you had a boyfriend."

"It's pretty new," he sighed. "We've only been together about a month now."

"That's so exciting! You didn't want to stay in LA and quarantine with him?"

"No, we thought it was too fresh for us to, like, fully move in together and if I was in LA and not living with him then we wouldn't see each other anyway, so I decided I may as well come here."

"That's really hard," I frowned as I pulled out the chair next to him and sat down. "I'm sorry that you had to make a decision like that."

"It's alright," he shrugged despite the sad look on his face. "A lot of people have had to make much tougher decisions than that lately."

"That doesn't mean you can't be upset anyway."

"I know, but I'll be alright. I'm just glad we've got so many ways to stay in touch." He flashed me a smile and I was glad to see it. Scott was a good guy and one of those people who was usually so positive and upbeat that it was hard to see him feeling down. "What about you? How are you doing with everything?"

"Oh, I don't know," I sighed. "Do you mean the deadly virus plaguing the world? Or the fact that I'm in lockdown with the father of my child who I have a fairly complicated history with?"

"Both," Scott chuckled as he sipped his drink of what looked to be whiskey. "But I was more referring to being here in lockdown with Chris."

"It's hard, but I'm doing okay. It's just a weird situation."

"It'll definitely take some time to get used to for both of you," he nodded. "He felt really bad this morning. He told me what you said about how offensive it is when he throws money at you all the time and I totally agree, but I hope you know his heart was in the right place. He tells everyone how talented you are, he would never want to belittle your career."

"I know," I winced. "I overreacted a little bit."

"No, not at all!" Scott assured me. "He needed to hear it. I've been on the receiving end of it too so I know how you felt, but he doesn't realize how it comes off some times. He's just trying to be generous and help the people he loves."

I nodded and I knew that I should just end the conversation there. Tell him that I understood what Chris' intent was and leave it at that. But my heart overpowered my brain and I found myself opening up before I could stop myself.

"I just don't exactly deserve to be on that list," I reminded him. "And I shouldn't take advantage of any feelings he might have for me after the decision that I made."

"You really do deserve to be on that list," he told me with a smile. "He's really in love with you."

"Love might be a bit extreme," I scoffed. "He's made his feelings clear, I know he cares about me, but it's not love."

"He's not made his feelings clear enough then," Scott countered. "Because he's been head over heels in love with you since pretty much the moment he met you."

My mouth went dry as my brain fought to comprehend that claim while all my instincts were telling me that it wasn't true. Scott wouldn't lie to me, he wasn't that kind of person, but he could be exaggerating especially since he had been drinking. There was an honesty in his eyes though, a look that told me he was telling the truth, but I couldn't accept it, it just didn't make sense.

"That's not true," I argued. "He only ever saw me as a friend until that one night and that night was a mistake."

But Scott was confident in what he'd shared and he shook his head.

"He never saw you as just a friend. You were his endgame from day one."

Perhaps it was a delaying tactic, perhaps it was a nervous response or I was subconsciously trying to buy myself some time to make sense of what he was trying to tell me, but a giggle slipped out at Scott's choice of words.

"Endgame? Is that an Avengers joke?"

"It wasn't intentional," he assured me with a laugh, but he was quick to get us back on topic. "But I mean it. We had a conversation just a few weeks after you met and he was talking about you like you hung the moon. He's been enamoured from the start."

I couldn't wrap my head around it. He was speaking with such confidence, but the words he was saying might as well have been another language. Knowing what I knew about our situation, how things had unfolded between us, how that first night together went down and the aftermath of it, there was no sign that Chris had been in love with me. He cared about me, that much I knew, but to be in love? That didn't add up.

Especially when I'd had those feelings all along as well. Surely, I would have noticed had they been reciprocated.

I'd fallen silent as my brain buzzed, scrambling for any gesture or obvious evidence that I'd missed that might prove Scott's claim, but when he spoke again, I was pulled from my thoughts.

"Do you not feel the same way about him?" He asked. "And there's no judgment here, I can see both sides. I love Chris and I want him to be happy, but I respect what you're trying to do."

I felt my heart rate spike again as my palms grew sweaty in a way that was becoming annoyingly familiar.

I was aware of the importance of this conversation, but I was also aware that I wasn't having it with the right person. If Scott was being honest then Chris must have had his reasons for not sharing the depth of his feelings with me and it felt sneaky and deceitful that I was finding out from someone else. It also felt wrong that the answer to Scott's question was on the tip of my tongue. Chris deserved to know before his brother, but I was tired. Fighting through this mess all by myself was wearing me down and Scott had always been one of those people that compelled you to pour your heart out to him. He was a better listener than most and I needed someone, anyone, to give me some kind of guidance. So the words were out of my mouth before I could stop them.

"I do feel the same," I admitted, my eyes firmly locked on the glass of water on the table in front of me as I worried I'd be too anxious to speak if I looked Scott in the eye. "I love him very much."

"Then why are you so scared to give him a chance?" He questioned. "Just because of Grayson?"

I nodded, but even I was starting to doubt my own motivations.

"We work together so well right now, but if we give it a shot and someone ends up getting hurt then we might not be able to put our feelings aside and keep things peaceful."

"But aren't you hurting each other every day that you spend in love with each other, but not together?" He pointed out. "Yet, you manage to put Grayson first through all that pain."

His words hit me like a bucket of ice water had been dumped over my head.

It was an excellent point.

We were both hurting from being apart, it was clear from how defensive we got over silly little things like we had that morning. I could only imagine how Chris felt, but it was hard for me to be around him all the time and just keep things friendly when in my heart I wanted more. I ached at the sight of him every time I dropped Grayson off or picked him up, but we still managed to be friendly and polite through that.

"How many of those drinks have you had?” I teased earning a laugh from Scott. “They’ve made you too wise.”

"Not enough," he joked. "But it's true, isn't it?"

"It is true, but it's different," I insisted. "If we were together and broke up, that kind of hurt can come with a lot of anger. Right now, we might be sad or disappointed about the situation, but there's no anger."

"Oh, there was anger," Scott informed me, grimacing slightly. "After Christmas, when he came back from dropping Grayson off at your house there was definitely anger. He slammed doors, stormed around the house, got drunk off his ass and ranted about it for hours. I've never seen him that upset over being turned down before."

My heart sank at that news. I knew that he'd been upset, but I didn't think he'd taken it that badly. I thought he was just a bit sulky, but now my guilt intensified.

"Why are you telling me this?" I asked, my voice thick with emotion. "I feel bad enough as it is..."

"Oh, honey, I'm not trying to make you feel bad," Scott assured me, reaching over to rub my back as I forced back the tears that had sprung to my eyes. "But it proves that even if one of you ends up heartbroken, you can still put Grayson first because you just did it."

"I didn't, Chris did," I pointed out after clearing my throat. "If it wasn't up to me, if Chris came to his senses and ditched me for some beautiful actress, then I'm not sure that I could be so forgiving."

"Why would he ditch you?"

As promised, there was no judgment in Scott's voice, just genuine curiosity and I shrugged as I answered.

"Because he could have any woman in America."

"Maybe not any woman, let's not get carried away," Scott smirked, his teasing tone making me smile. "But for such a relationship loving guy, don't you think it's interesting that he hasn't been in a serious relationship in about five years?"

That wasn't something I'd put much thought into, but it wasn't the 'gotcha' moment that it seemed like Scott had hoped it was.

"Not really. He's been busy with work the last few years," I pointed out. "And having a baby with me must have complicated his personal life a bit."

"You complicated his personal life the moment he met you," Scott insisted. "That's my point."

He sounded so sure of himself, but the words he was saying were still hard for me to comprehend. I'd always been so confident in my understanding of our relationship and if I was to believe him, it would shatter everything I thought I knew.

"I just don't see why he wouldn't have mentioned this by now..."

"You know how he gets with his anxiety. He's not always the over confident hotshot that people assume he is," Scott reminded me. "But you'll have to talk to him if you want more information than that."

I let out a sigh as I knew he was right.

"There's a lot that we need to talk about," I admitted. "Thank you for this though, Scott, you've given me a lot to think about."

"Anytime," he smiled. "And I completely respect that you're willing to put Grayson first despite whatever feelings you have. You're a wonderful mom and I would be proud to call you my sister-in-law."

I laughed at his outrageous leap from even considering a relationship straight to marriage and shook my head.

"You need to go to bed, Scott," I instructed. "You've clearly had too much to drink tonight."

"I probably have," he agreed. "But I meant everything that I've said. Think about it, okay?"

I nodded as I slid off the stool I was sitting on, wrapping my arms around him in a quick hug.

"I'm here for you too, you know that right?" I asked as I stepped back. "If you ever want to talk about your situation or vent and complain about the distance, whatever you need, I'm here."

"Thanks, Whitney," he smiled before dragging himself off his stool as well. "Goodnight."

I returned his smile and mumbled a 'goodnight' of my own before heading back to bed with all the new information that Scott had provided echoing around in my head. While it had been a very informative conversation, I wasn't quite sure whether I came away from it with the clarity I was looking for or just more confusion.

-

Part Three

Tags:  @maggotzombie @moonlacebeam @mizzzpink @zaylaugh @flowery-mess @flowerjewels @njrronaldo7​ @hockeychick10

#chris evans fanfiction #chris evans fic #chris evans fanfic #more hearts than mine

[deanstead]

Glad You’re Safe

Pairing: Jay Halstead x Paramedic!Reader

Request by anon: Hi there! I was wondering if you could do a Jay Halstead imagine during the ‘Infection’ episode. The reader is exposed to the virus, the tests shows negative but they still keep her in quarantine. Been into Worried!Jay tics lately haha! And can the reader be either part of Intelligence or Ambo 61. Thanks hun xx

Warnings: Mentions of blood/injury, (some) anxiety

A/N: Based off of the Infection three-part crossover. Sorry, this took a while! I didn’t want to turn this into an episode rewrite so I just picked certain parts that I felt could fit in with the whole theme of the imagine/oneshot. I hope this turned out okay and that you like it!

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Ambo 61, Man down, unknown causes

The announcement rang through the firehouse. You looked at Sylvie as the two of you stood at the same time, jogging towards the ambulance and sliding in quickly before Sylvie sped off.

“This is crazy.” You commented. The whole firehouse had spent the day in the common room, the news reports flashing every few seconds. To say it didn’t freak you out was definitely a lie.

Sylvie gave you a tight smile. “We’ll get through this. Like we always do.” You could hear the strain in her voice but you didn’t say more, as she pulled up at the address.

Grabbing your kits, the both of you jogged up the stairs, Sylvie knocking on the door immediately. “Fire Department!”

The door swung open and the both of you stepped in, looking around. “Anyone call for Paramedics?”

You swung your head around again as you heard a groan. “Brett.” You pointed deeper into the apartment, heading in ahead of Sylvie.

“Sir? Are you okay?” You asked, as the man in front of you swayed a little on his feet. He didn’t look like he even registered the fact that you were there.

“Sir?” You tried again, stepping forward before he fell forwards onto you, the both of you crumpling towards the ground.

“Y/L/N!” Sylvie rushed towards you, pulling him off you. Sylvie froze momentarily at the sight in front of her. You had blood smeared all over your front, including your hands. You swallowed, looking back at the man who was no longer conscious.

“Come on, Brett. I’m fine.” You reassured her, clambering up and pulling his now blood-stained shirt upwards to reveal the rotting skin and tissue below. You exchanged a look with Sylvie before quickly covering the open wound as best as you could.

“Come on, let’s go.” You urged, as the both of you fastened him onto the stair chair, down the stairs and into the ambulance.

---

After you had been checked out, very thoroughly you might add, you had been brought down to this area, where there were at least already 30 people in individual tents.

Yeap, quarantine.

“Y/N? Y/N! Are you okay?” Jay’s voice made you look up.

He looped around the tents, moving closer to your tent.

“Jay? What are you doing here?” You asked, getting up.

“What happened?” Jay asked, not answering you, and you could already hear the stress in his voice.  

“Jay, it’s okay, I’m fine.” You reassured. “The first test came back clean. They’re just keeping me here for a while more to be safe. They’ll do a second run later just to be sure.”

Jay didn’t answer but quietly put his hand up against the transparent plastic sheet of the quarantine tent. You smiled and put yours up against his, only the plastic sheet separating your palms. “You go do what you have to do. I’ll be fine.”

Jay hesitated. “Go.” You repeated, smiling at him for good measure.

“Jay.” You called out again before he left.

He raised his eyebrow in that adorable way he does.

“Stay safe out there.” You whispered.

Jay sighed, smiling back at you. “I’ll be back to check on you.”

You smiled back at him as you watched him duck out.

---

Jay ground his teeth as he stood on the empty street where the parade was supposed to be taking place, alongside Chief Boden, Severide, Casey and Voight.

This prick had put the whole Chicago at risk but he had put you at risk and even hurt Will. He’d be more than happy to pound this prick’s ass into the ground.

“If he’s buying time, it means we still have time to get ahead of him.” Voight told Boden just as their radio crackled.

“Engine 51, Squad 3, Ambo 61, structure fire. Reports of looting, 1300 Hazel Avenue.”

Boden and Voight exchanged a look before shaking hands.

Casey patted Jay on the shoulder. “Hey, the test came back negative. We just heard back. Thought you might like to know. She’ll be back with us soon.”

Jay let out a breath. “Thanks, Casey.”

---

The minutes ticked by with you sitting there doing nothing, while your whole family at 51 was probably running ragged around the city with calls, and Jay was out there trying to catch the culprit as well.

You? You were just sitting here.

You looked up when you heard footsteps. “Hey Y/N.”

“Natalie.” You greeted, getting to your feet.

Natalie smiled, “Good news. We ran your cultures again, just to be safe and they came back free of infection.”

“Thanks Natalie.” You nodded to her. “I’ll head back to the firehouse.”

Natalie smiled as you hurtled out of there, glad to be out and ready to get back into the field.

You jogged into the firehouse, smiling as you saw Herrmann get out of the truck. “Hey!” Herrmann called as he spotted you, moving forward to give you a tight hug.

“Welcome back!”

“Everything okay?” Joe asked as he walked towards you. You could see the weariness on everyone’s faces.

You nodded, “All clear.”

Joe sighed, jamming his hands into his pocket. “Good. Now all I want is a nice long bath and a vat of Purell.”

As if on cue, the announcement beeped in.

Engine 51, Squad 3, Ambulance 61, evacuation assistance, 2600 Roosevelt.

Joe’s face fell as Sylvie came running out. “We just heard from CPD. This is them – they think that Dr Seldon’s hitting the BRT building from the west side.” She paused as she reached you. “Ready, partner?”

You nodded, glad to finally feel useful. “Born ready.”

You followed her towards the ambulance as you heard Herrmann shout to the rest, “Alright, you heard her! Let’s move! This is it! Let’s end this!”

Sylvie stepped on the accelerator, hurtling towards the address but glanced at you. “I’m glad you’re okay.” She said.

You chuckled, “Tell me about it.” You paused, “I haven’t even had the chance to tell Jay yet.”

Sylvie glanced at you, a smile playing on her lips. “What, that the moment you were released from quarantine, you’re right back on the field?”

“Guilty.”

The both of you smiled as Sylvie pulled up to the address and you guys hopped out. The place was already swarming with trucks and patrol cars as you spotted Voight and Will stop not too far from where you were standing.

“My brother’s in there?” You heard Will’s voice rise as Voight nodded and your heart dropped.

Jay.

You bit your lip and took a deep breath as Sylvie tapped you on the shoulder. “Come on.”

Figuring that it’d be better to keep yourself busy with what you had to do, rather than stand around worrying about Jay, you nodded. “Just give me a moment, I’ll be right back.”

You ran to catch up with Will. “Will.”

Will spun around, his eyes locking onto yours.

“Don’t worry.” He whispered, squeezing my shoulder before following after Voight closely. “I’ll be back with him.”

You swallowed, watching Will’s retreating back for a second more before turning and heading back to where you were needed.

You busied yourself with seeing to anyone who was injured from the evacuation - a few sprained ankles or bruises but nothing too serious. In a way, you were glad to be busy.

Then you heard it – a gunshot from the other side of the building. Your head snapped up as you heard more popping sounds from the building itself. You forced yourself to look away, moving among the crowd again to busy yourself until you felt a hand on your shoulder.

“We’re good here. Go on.” Sylvie said.

You looked back at your PIC.

Sylvie nodded encouragingly. You looked over at Chief Boden who nodded back to you. 

“Thanks.” You muttered, heading towards the entrance of the building. You were sure everyone around you could probably hear your heart pounding in your chest.

It felt like forever before the door swung open and you spotted them – Voight, Will and… Jay.

A wave of relief washed over you as you watched him walk out of that building, looking like he had a few hours ago, except with a little frown across his face. That is, until he saw you.

“Y/N.” He breathed, jogging towards you and sweeping you into his arms.

His hand cradled the back of your head as he pulled you into him. You kept silent but closed your eyes, just glad to be back in Jay’s arms. “Are you okay?” You asked.

Jay smiled, “Yeah, I’m okay.” He nodded, as your eyes flicked to the gash on his arm and you glared at him.

“Sarge.” He called as Voight nodded at him, motioning for him to go with you.

You growled a little as you tugged him back towards the ambulance. “No chances, okay?” You said, as Jay laughed, shaking his head a little at your insistence but following you anyway.

“It’s not even a…” He stopped midsentence as you glared at him, falling to silence and perching himself at the open back of the ambulance.

“Are you really gonna argue with me about this after the day we have both had?”

Jay smiled, raising his hands in mock defeat, as you poured saline over the open gash and put a plaster over it.

Quietly, Jay raised his hand, cupping your face and stroking your cheek with his thumb. “I’m glad you’re alright.” He whispered.

Your eyes flicked up to him, the whole world melting into the background, as if there was only you and Jay in this space and time. You sighed, “Right back at you. I was worried.”

“Not as worried as I was.” Jay shot back.

His eyes lingered on you for a while longer before he gently tugged you towards him again. You let yourself be pulled back into his embrace, just glad that everything was over.

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