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ncssian · 3 years

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A Favor: Part Nineteen

Nessian Modern AU

Masterlist

a/n: another chapter where the girls are clowns and cassian worships nesta's every breath 🙄 i promise some variety is headed your way soon

***

Gwyn adamantly refuses to accept any gifts for her birthday, much to Emerie’s irritation and Nesta’s relief. No amount of love for her friends can make Nesta enjoy the turmoil of hunting for the perfect gift, and she happily shows up at Gwyn’s apartment that night with nothing save for an overnight bag.

Gwyn easily has the nicest home out of all three of the girls, and it makes Nesta feel oddly proud to have a financially stable friend. Nesta herself has been flacking on her legal consultant duties to Night Court Inc., choosing to make do with the money she’s already earned while focusing on school.

Once they’ve all changed into sleep clothes and are settled around the living room coffee table with a cupcake and a glass of wine each, Gwyn pulls out a brightly colored bracelet-making kit with a sheepish grin. “I found this while I was looking through my childhood things,” she says, opening the kit. “You guys aren’t too grown for it, are you?”

“Depends,” Emerie hums, leaning over to get a closer look. “Is it Rainbow Loom?”

She gets her answer when Gwyn dumps out bundles of multicolored string instead of rubber bands onto the table. Looking disappointed, Emerie plucks up a handful of string. “Fine, I guess I can make do.”

Nesta licks cream cheese frosting off her thumb. “How do you make them? The bracelets?”

She’s met with two dumbfounded stares. “Have you never been to a thirteen year old’s slumber party?” Gwyn says.

“...No?”

When Gwyn and Emerie keep staring, Nesta feels the need to add, “I’ve never been to a sleepover. This is my first.” She was never one to be invited to sleepovers or social gatherings; even when she made acquaintances in middle and high school, they were just that—acquaintances.

“That’s… actually kind of sad,” Emerie says. Gwyn elbows her hard, making her yelp.

“I never thought of it that way,” Nesta says, shrugging. Though maybe it’s because a lot of things about her childhood were sad; it isn’t like she kept count of it all.

“Well, you can learn how to make bracelets now,” Gwyn states, taking out a little plastic baggie and emptying it out onto the table. Small silver charms scatter everywhere. “Everyone gets three colors and one charm.”

Nesta leans forward, making out the different charms. She spies one in the shape of a book, and another in the shape of a dove, and one in the shape of a music note. She snatches up the eighth note before anyone else can. Gwyn takes the book for herself, and Emerie considers the selection of charms before picking a dagger-shaped one. They prepare their string next.

“Now, we can either braid them or knot them.” Gwyn demonstrates how to do it either way, Nesta watching closely before imitating her. She braids the strings of her bracelet as best she can, her cheeks turning red with frustration whenever she spies one of the other girls’ perfect knots. Her half-eaten cupcake is forgotten as she tries to get her bracelet to stay together.

At one point she just has to accept the shoddy work she’s done and tie the bracelet off. She checks to see if it fits on her wrist.

“Now everyone give their bracelet to the person on their left,” Gwyn declares.

Nesta clutches her sloppily-made bracelet to her chest as Emerie responds, “What?”

“So we can wear each other’s bracelets,” Gwyn explains. “And carry around a part of each other all the time.”

“If I had known we were gonna be sentimental, I wouldn’t have picked the cute charm,” Emerie grumbles. Nesta agrees, but Gwyn just clicks her tongue and starts switching bracelets around. In the end, Nesta has Emerie’s dagger bracelet, Gwyn has Nesta’s music note bracelet, and Emerie has Gwyn’s book charm.

Nesta wiggles her bracelet on and turns her wrist over in the light. “That was fun,” she decides. “What happens next at a sleepover?”

“Next,” Gwyn says, “we exchange our most embarrassing secrets with each other, and then we do each other’s hair.”

Emerie shakes her head. “Okay, now I’m really too old for this. Anyone want to watch a movie?”

Gwyn nudges Emerie. “I’m the old one here, and it’s my birthday.” She raises her pert chin in a way that doesn’t look very grown up at all. “What I say goes.”

Emerie flicks up an eyebrow and stares in challenge, which Nesta interrupts by saying, rather exasperatedly, “I’ll go first, then.”

She digs around in her head for something embarrassing enough to be socially acceptable, only to realize that although a lot of embarrassing things have happened to her before, none of them are secrets. She finally settles on an admission. “When I was a kid, I had a thing for breaking and entering into rich people’s empty houses and hanging out in them. Does that count as a secret?”

Gwyn gapes, laughing in disbelief. “Are you going to leave it at that?”

“That actually sounds fun.” Emerie swirls her wine. “Why’d you stop?”

Nesta had almost forgotten. “I got caught.” She remembers the terror of being fourteen and fleeing past cherry blossom trees on her bare feet. “The owner’s family showed up early to vacation one year, and I never risked going back after that.” She shrugs. “Who’s next?”

Gwyn raises her hand excitedly. “I used to be a hardcore Gleek. Like, I had a closet full of Glee memorabilia.”

Nesta doesn’t quite know what to say. Emerie winces. “Maybe you should’ve kept that one a secret.”

“It was only one facet of my entire theatre kid personality. Should I tell you about the rest?”

Emerie raises her hands in surrender. “Please don’t. I’ll go next if it makes you stop.”

Gwyn laughs and Nesta perks up. “What’s your secret?” She hopes Emerie will finally admit to filling their shared Kindle account with lesbian spanking fiction.

But Emerie suddenly gets serious, clearing her throat and fingering the stem of her wine glass. “I might have the worst secret,” she says awkwardly. “I haven’t been honest with you guys.”

Nesta straightens, and Gwyn looks intrigued.

“In my defense,” Emerie says, “I never expected all of us to end up hanging out this much. Before Nesta and I became friends, all I did was show up to school to kick rich kids’ asses and make career connections.”

“Spit it out, Emerie,” Nesta tells her.

So she does. “I’ve been lying about my age.” Her cheeks turn red, either from alcohol or embarrassment, Nesta doesn’t know.

Nesta furrows her brows. “You’re not twenty-four?”

Emerie shakes her head in guilt.

“How old are you, then?” Gwyn says.

Emerie mutters something too low for them to hear. When Gwyn tells her to repeat herself, she says, too loudly, “Twenty-eight.”

She’s met with silence, and then—

Gwyn starts cackling, nearly keeling over. Nesta can only stare in shock. “Why would you—?”

“Because school is a shark tank,” Emerie says. “Everyone else went there straight out of undergrad, and I had to work four jobs for four years just to afford tuition. Being old at Prythian means being poor.” She quietens, looking down at her brown hands twisted together. “And by the time we started to get close, it felt too weird to bring up. So… I’m sorry?” She looks up to see if Nesta is upset.

Nesta doesn’t know what to feel, but Gwyn seems to. “You called me old,” she accuses. “You’re nearly a grandma!”

“Were you going to lie about your age forever?” Nesta interjects.

“If I had known there was going to be a forever, I would have opened up a lot sooner,” Emerie defends.

Nesta drops her head onto the table and covers her ears with her arms. “This is so weird,” she says against the wood of the table, her voice muffled. “I can never look at you the same way ever again.”

“That’s fair,” Emerie says cautiously. “But are you really mad?” Nesta feels a hesitant hand touch her shoulder.

“I need time to process,” Nesta says from her cocoon. Suddenly she hears a hum and a click, and her cocoon gets even darker. Gwyn and Emerie make twin sounds of surprise.

Poking her head up, Nesta blinks to find total darkness in the apartment. The heater has stopped running, leaving behind a quiet stillness.

“Shit,” Gwyn curses, fumbling with her phone. The flashlight turns on, lighting up her face. “I swear I paid my electric bill.”

“I don’t think it’s just you,” Emerie says, getting up to look out the window. “Look, the whole street is out.”

By the time they gather some candles and light them, the apartment has dropped twenty degrees in temperature. Nesta shudders, wishing she’d brought some warm pants with her.

“Let me get us some blankets,” Gwyn says, running off to the linen closet. Emerie and Nesta huddle together on the couch while they wait.

“So you’re really not mad at me?” Emerie asks, hope in her voice.

“Not mad,” Nesta says. “But I think we all lost a little respect for you back there.”

Emerie smiles. “Just a little?”

Gwyn comes back then wearing a thick sweater and carrying a pile of comforters. “I got a text from the landlord,” she says, unceremoniously dropping the blankets onto the couch. “Ice took out the power lines in the whole neighborhood, and we’re not getting any electricity until morning.”

“But it’s negative temperatures outside,” Nesta protests. “We’ll freeze to death.”

“Not if we all cuddle.” Gwyn tries to beam at them, but the effort is futile. “I’m sorry, guys,” she sighs, plopping onto the couch beside Nesta. “This is a terrible birthday celebration.”

Nesta wraps an arm around Gwyn and tucks her into her side, soaking up her warmth as Emerie spreads a heavy comforter over all of their legs. “What are you apologizing for? You did nothing wrong.”

The girls sit in silence for a few minutes until Emerie speaks up. “I wonder what Mr. Madani is doing right now.”

“What?” Nesta frowns.

“He’s probably all alone in his fancy heated cabin, unaware that you’re stuck in the cold dark.” Emerie suddenly smacks Nesta’s arm. “Hey. Why are we freezing our asses off here when you practically own that cabin?”

“I do not practically own that cabin,” Nesta splutters. “And this is Gwyn’s birthday. Why would I take you to Cassian’s place on her birthday?”

“Exactly!” Emerie says. “It’s Gwyn’s birthday, and she deserves better than this. Can’t your boyfriend be a little charitable and share his nice house with us?”

Nesta turns to Gwyn for help, but Gwyn just says carefully, “...Is it a big cabin?”

Emerie nods fiercely, pulling out her phone. “Eris has a picture of it from New Year’s on his Instagram. You wouldn’t believe how much money these Night Court execs make.”

Nesta makes pointed eyes at Gwyn. “You really want to spend your birthday with two strange men?” Cassian and Azriel aren’t exactly meek, nonthreatening men either—at least not at first glance. Considering the state Gwyn was in just some weeks ago, this doesn’t sound like a good idea at all.

Gwyn sounds wary but open-minded when she says, “You trust them, right? And it’s not like we’re going to let the guys join our sleepover. We’re just going to have a warm place to stay while we wait for my power to come back.”

When it’s phrased like that… Nesta purses her lips, thinking.

“Fine,” she finally decides. “Let’s go.”

***

Nesta strips off her jeans almost as soon as she enters the cabin. Much to Cassian’s pride and pleasure, this leaves her wearing only one of his old sweatshirts. Meanwhile, Gwyn and Emerie stand around awkwardly in the middle of the living area without knowing what to do next.

“Make yourselves at home.” Cassian grins at them. “Do you need anything? Food? Drinks?”

“Stop worrying,” Nesta groans. “We don’t need to be mothered.”

“I totally hear you,” he nods. “I’ll make cookies.” And maybe some hot drinks. It’s supposed to be a birthday party, after all.

Just then, Azriel appears at the top of the stairs in a dark hoodie and sweats. He’s halfway down the steps when he notices the living room full of girls and promptly turns around.

Cassian calls his name before he can escape. “Want to help me out in the kitchen?”

“No, thanks,” Az says over his shoulder, leaving Cassian alone to play host.

While Gwyn and Emerie admire the cabin (“There’s a gym down the hallway and a library upstairs,” Nesta points out to them), Cassian gathers baking ingredients in the kitchen. He rarely eats desserts or junk food, much less makes them, but surely he can manage a snack for the girls.

When he returns to the living room half an hour later with cookies and mugs of hot chocolate, the coffee table has been moved out of the way and replaced with a spread of blankets and pillows. The fire crackles hotly enough that Gwyn and Emerie have joined Nesta in discarding any extra clothing articles, and they all cheer from the couch when they spy the food.

“Goddamn,” Emerie whistles at the platter of cookies on Nesta’s lap. “Nesta told us you were a catch, Mr. Madani, but she didn’t tell us she got the full housewife package.”

“Shut up.” Nesta shoves a cookie into Emerie’s mouth and passes Gwyn some hot chocolate. Any toughness vanishes when she looks back at Cassian. “Thank you,” she mouths, and he answers by smoothing out her ponytail.

Satisfied with his work and feeling guilty for crashing the girls’ fun, he’s about to call it a night when he feels a tug at his pants. Nesta is looking up at him with eyes that ask him to stay. Cassian glances nervously to Gwyn and Emerie, who are arguing about what movie to watch from his extensive streaming collection, and glances back to Nesta. Are you sure? he asks her silently.

She nods, but it isn’t until Gwyn says, “Just sit down, you’re blocking the TV,” that he indeed sits his ass down on the floor by Nesta’s feet.

A short tug of war between Gwyn and Emerie results in Emerie getting the remote. She blows a hair triumphantly out of her face. “No Planet Earth documentary for you, then,” she says.

Gwyn sits back, grumbling, “You’d think I’d get treated better on my damn birthday.” Nesta adds, “I like documentaries.”

“You’ll like The Proposal even more,” Emerie refutes, scrolling through the TV.

The smell of melting chocolate chips must invade the rest of the cabin, because not long after the movie begins, Cassian catches Azriel sneaking downstairs. As subtle as a shadow, no one even notices him until he plucks up a cookie from the side table by Nesta.

She slides her eyes over to him without turning her head. “You look like a punk with your hood up,” she snorts. “What are you, fifteen?”

From the floor, Cassian withholds a sigh.

Az shoots her a dark look, clearly not appreciating the attention brought to his presence. “Don’t be a little shit,” he warns in a low tone. He reaches for another cookie and Nesta bats his hand away. “Those aren’t for you,” she hisses.

“Can we please not—” Cassian tries.

Az glares and goes for the cookie again. Nesta smacks him back, which results in a slap fight that is only interrupted by Gwyn pleading, “Guys, we’re missing Sandra Bullock!”

Nesta pulls away, looking apologetic, and Az flushes pink. “Sorry,” he mutters. But he snatches up three cookies with a final look at Nesta and goes to sit in the armchair on the other side of the room.

Nesta, Gwyn, and Emerie get cozy once more, quickly forgetting that Az is there. Emerie stretches her brown legs out across Gwyn’s lap like a cat. Nesta drapes her own leg over Cassian’s shoulder without warning. He turns around to meet her eyes, surprised, but she’s already intently focused on the movie. Smiling faintly to himself, he reaches up to brush her skin. It probably looks to everyone else like she owns him head to toe.

One thing Cassian quickly learns about the girls is that they simply can’t sit still. Even Nesta is more restless than usual, and she nearly kicks Cassian in the head more than once while readjusting herself on the couch. Emerie moves to sprawl on the rug. Gwyn sits upside down and watches with her head dangling off the seat.

As for Cassian, he loses all interest in the movie once Nesta joins him and Emerie on the floor, unable to contain her emotions from the couch. He glances between the movie and her face to find what’s making her so giddy, but it’s only the two main characters getting ready for a shower. He lifts a brow in amusement for no one to see, but settles back to watch her face in the glow of the dying fire. He’s waiting for her smile.

Because when Nesta really likes something, she’ll smile, and when she smiles… Everything scrunches up: her nose, her eyes, her cheeks.

On the TV, a naked Ryan Reynolds and Sandra Bullock collide into each other, toppling to the floor. Nesta’s grin makes an appearance, and she slaps Cassian’s thigh in excitement, hard enough to hurt.

He hisses in a sharp breath, but doesn’t say anything or look away. He thinks he might have to kill anyone that refuses to protect the smile on her face right now, no matter who it is.

Once the scene changes, he walks two fingers up her leg to get her attention. “Nesta,” he whispers, unable to help himself.

She glances at him for half a second before looking back to the movie. “What?”

He opens his arms and gestures her closer. Come and let me hold you.

Nesta makes a face. “Don’t embarrass me in front of the girls.”

Cassian’s lips turn down. “You don’t mean that.”

She does. To prove her point, she crawls closer to Emerie and settles down next to her. Gwyn joins them on the floor, and they all huddle together.

When he catches Az staring at him with a hint of revulsion, Cassian coughs off the yearning and rejection and glares right back.

After the movie finishes, Emerie victoriously crushes an empty can of beer in her fist. Cassian has no idea where it came from. “More Sandra!” she demands.

It takes three more movies before Emerie is knocked out cold on the arrangement of blankets and pillows on the floor, Gwyn with her. Nesta eventually came back to Cassian and fell asleep with her arms wrapped around his waist, and Azriel passed out sometime after Miss Congeniality, curled up in the armchair with his fist propping up his head.

Now, Cassian carefully untangles Nesta from himself, nudging her towards Emerie instead. In her sleep, Nesta turns over to clutch the other woman’s arm and mumbles something unintelligible.

Cassian props a pillow gently beneath her head and picks up another one, throwing it harder than he needs to at Azriel’s face. “Get up,” he hisses.

Az jerks out of his sleep, looking around the dim room in confusion. Cursing lowly, he pushes himself out of his seat and scrubs a hand through his hair. “What time is it?”

“Three.” Cassian pulls a comforter over Nesta and Emerie’s shoulders.

Az crouches and picks up the other side of the comforter, adjusting it over Gwyn’s body. Cassian thinks he might see a frown cross his face for half a second, but then Az is standing up and brushing off his clothes.

After turning off the TV, the guys head for their rooms. “I didn’t think three grown women could be so... much,” Az says as they climb up the stairs.

Cassian huffs a laugh. “We were like that when we were younger, too.”

“Yeah, but we were teenagers.”

They reach the hallway. “I don’t know about the others,” Cassian says thoughtfully, “but Nesta never got to be a normal kid.” She barely got to be a normal adult. And in a couple of short years, she’ll be working her ass off at some prestigious firm and won’t have time for simple things like sleepovers anymore.

Cassian selfishly hopes he can give Nesta all the normalcy he can before that happens.

***

a/n: i’m gonna do my best in future chapters to give cassian depth beyond just his relationship with nesta 🥴 but first, be on the lookout for a gwynriel bonus scene :)

tags: @hellasblessed @sjm-things @thewayshedreamed @drielecarla @valkyriewarriors @superspiritfestival @aliveahaahahafuck @cupcakey00 @sayosdreams @rainbowcheetah512 @claralady @thebluemartini @nessiantho @missing-merlin @duskandstarlight @lucy617 @sleeping-and-books @everything-that-i-love @cassianscool @swankii-art-teacher @awesomelena555 @julemmaes @wickedqueenoffantasy @poisonous-bloom @observationanxioustheorist @gisellefigue08 @courtofjurdan @theoverlyenthusiasticwriter @wolfiixxx @cass-nes @seashade @royaltykxx @illyrianundercover @queenestarcheron @monstrousloves-explodinggalaxies @humanexile @that-golden-lyre @agentsofsheilds @mercy-is-alive @cassiansbigwingspan @laylaameer01 @verypaleninja @maastrash @bow-dawn @perseusannabeth @dead-on-the-inside666 @jlinez @hungryreadingaddict @anidealiveson @planet-faerie @shallowhighwaters @ghostlyrose2 @chosenfamily-valkyriequeens @rarephloxes @readiajin @nessiantrashh @live-the-fangirl-life @ifinallygavein @xoblivisci @sjmships @jungtaekwoonie-is-life @lysandra-tiara9 @lanyjoy-13 @frosted-crackers @post-it-notes33 @loosingdreams @fromthelibraryofemilyj @18moneytoad

#ncssianwrites #nesta archeron #nessian #cassian #a favor #nessian fic #nessian au

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woodland--fae · 3 years

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If I were SJM writing ACOWAR I would have dramatically changed the outcome of Rhys’ resurrection.

Ok. Time for another ACOTAR rant because I just can’t help myself.

One of my biggest complaints about this series is how the main characters are never faced with threats that actually threaten their power. While they may battle insurmountable odds, the reader comes to expect that they will achieve their goals unscathed and with dramatic flair. Rhys, Feyre, and the rest of the IC are blessed with immense power, even better looks, and an author who thinks they are perfect in every way.

The characters are so perfect that they can die and be resurrected with virtually zero consequences. SJM has made them invulnerable.

Don’t get me wrong. I hate when beloved characters die in a series, but it is equally frustrating when characters “die” and are then resurrected within minutes at seemingly no cost. Dramatically, this takes away from the emotion of the moment and cheapens the initial sacrifice by making it seemingly moot.

What am I referring to? Rhysand’s death (or lack thereof) in ACOWAR.

If I were SJM writing ACOWAR I would have dramatically changed the outcome of Rhys’ resurrection. The price of his sacrifice for Feyre should come at the cost of his High Lord powers. We know, according to the lore that SJM herself has written, that when a High Lord dies his power automatically transfers onto another. We also know that in ACOWAR Rhys is dead. I know Feyre talks about an essence of him holding on through their bond, but for all intents and purposes he is dead. If the other High Lords don’t offer up part of their life-force, Rhys remains dead. It’s as simple as that. Therefore, during those moments before his resurrection it makes sense that the High Lord powers of the Night Court would transfer onto a new High Lord.

I get so excited thinking about this twist for multiple reasons.

I love the idea of Rhys’ love for Feyre and his people manifesting in his self-sacrifice. We know that Rhys is devoted to his people and to Feyre. He has also made sacrifices for his court in the past. This ultimate sacrifice reinforces this characterization. Furthermore, the loss of his High Lord powers is compelling because it proves that Rhys was willing to give up his immense power for the ones he loves. Since Rhys willingly sacrificed himself in ACOWAR, we can make the assumption that he knew his power would end up transferring to someone else upon his death. In contrast to other fae who put power before everything else, Rhys would stand out as willing to give up everything for love. This makes Rhys more likeable and less of an arrogant asshole who gets what he wants when he wants because he is all powerful. I for one am not impressed by how he is seemingly the most powerful High Lord in Prythian for…reasons. It’s cheesy, and makes the main characters literally invulnerable. It makes the story boring and frustrating and gives the characters no room for personal growth. Why grow when you already have everything? I think it would be more interesting for readers to see how he and Feyre adjust to life without his High Lord Powers. Who is Rhys without his godlike powers anyway? Which leads to my second point.

If the High Lord Powers of the Night Court are transferred… who do they go to? Definitely not to a member of the Inner Circle or any other ally. We’re here for compelling plot, not giving characters advantages just because we like them! No. My suggestion is that the High Lord powers shift to…. Keir!!! You might be asking yourself, why Keir? He is such an asshole and would be a terrible High Lord. To which I reply, exactly! To set up the conflict in the next series of books we have ACOWAR end on a bittersweet note. On the one hand, the King of Hybern is dead, and all the major characters survived! On the other hand, Rhys’ power has transferred to one of his enemies. Not only are Rhys and co. now vulnerable, Velaris is also at risk from their new High Lord. This bittersweet ending achieves a good payoff for the survival of all the main characters. Stylistically it makes for better writing and a more realistic end to the series instead of “and we lived happily ever after as the most powerful High Lord and Lady in existence.” The sequel series would see Rhys and co. struggle to regain/retain control over Velaris and their people. The plot with the human queens is all good and fine… except that SJM literally never lets us leave the Night Court. 3/4 of the action in books 3 onward takes place in the Night Court. Therefore, it would be a nice change for the conflict to actually take place there and not with some Human Queens that have hardly any page time. This conflict with the new High Lord of the Night Court also offers some interesting new opportunities for character development. Rhys, for the first time in his existence would feel like a stranger in his own court and body. Technically, under Amarantha he was unable to access the majority of his High Lord powers but in that case it was different because he was still High Lord and had access to some of that power however diminished. In this circumstance, he has been stripped of all High Lord powers. He wouldn’t have all the answers, he literally is not in control. This allows him to empathize with Nesta and Elain. Feyre’s sisters also feel like strangers in their new bodies. They were violated and forced to become Fae; they unwillingly gave up their humanity in a way that parallels Rhys unwittingly giving up his power to Keir. In this alternate series Rhys comes to respect and understand both Nesta and Elain for who they are, not who he wants them to be. They have similar journeys of self discovery as each has to learn how to live again. Speaking of Nesta…. oh baby let’s talk about Nesta. Who took immense power from the cauldron? You guessed it, our girl Nesta. Who retains this power even when Rhys is powerless? Ding ding ding, right again! Nesta. In this alternate series women do not have to give up, or diminish their power while their male counterparts get to enjoy it (re: Amren returning with zero powers while Rhys retains all of his at the end of ACOWAR). How great would it be for Rhys and Feyre to need Nesta to help them stand against Keir? How great would it be for Nesta to have a character arc where the main characters actually respect her autonomy, personhood, traumas, and power??!! Reading ACOSF made me equal parts upset, angry, and bewildered. Here are a few reasons why: strong female characters don’t allow others to walk all over them, refusing to fund Nesta’s lifestyle and controlling every aspect of her life are two different things, and Nesta is not the only character who needs to apologize. I’m going to say it again, Nesta is not the only character who needs to apologize. That’s all I’ll say on this subject as ACOSF is another rant for another day. I think these changes in plot also benefit Feyre’s character as well. I see a huge difference between the character I loved in ACTOAR & ACOMAF and the rest of the series. It’s unrealistic that someone with very little leadership experience can fall so easily into the role of powerful High Lady and I feel like her character lost a lot of relatability as the series progressed. The Feyre of ACOTAR would not act like the Feyre of ACOSF.

When the courts were first introduced to us it always bothered me that there were four seasonal courts but only three solar courts… where is the dusk court? I think that my alternate sequel series would culminate in the birth of the Dusk Court. It bothers me that the Night Court is so divided. Rhys literally hates the Court of Nightmares and at best merely tolerate them. It’s hard to reconcile that both Velaris and the Court of Nightmares are the part of the same Court. On other days I would argue that Nightmares are dreams too and Rhys has no business condemning literally half of his court in favour of Velaris. But today I’m going to give it to him. In this alternate sequel series, Velaris is different for a reason. It isn’t meant to be part of the Night Court. Velaris seems likes a different court, and so it shall be: behold! Velaris, capital of the Dusk Court! Who leads them? The newly minted High Lord and Lady of the Dusk Court: Rhys and Feyre. It may seem counterintuitive to give Rhys High Lord powers back when I’ve established why it is so important for him to lose them, but in my alternate series he will have had to fight, make sacrifices, and develop empathy for other people in ways that make him worthy of being High Lord. It also works as a narrative device for him to receive what he lost after proving himself (by working alongside Feyre, her sisters, and the rest of the IC as equals). I also think it is fitting that Rhys and Feyre could create a new court together.

I hope you have enjoyed my rantings. I’m going to end this here since it’s already obscenely long. I would love to hear your thoughts! I believe firmly that Rhys should never have resurrected with his High Lord powers. The consequences of this could have been so compelling for future books. And it upsets me to see such wasted potential for character growth. This rant is mostly an exercise for myself to rewrite the worst parts of these books in ways that let me love these characters again. No-one should be victim to Mary/Gary Stu-Syndrome. not even Riceball.

#omg I need to write this fic #i hate that the characters refuse to see their own flaws but condemn literally so many other people for similar behaviour #let's take away riceball's power #anti sjm #anti acosf #anti ACOTAR #acowar spoilers #ACOTAR spoilers #high lord #night court #prythian #fae #ACOTAR #anti rhysand

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bookofmirth · 2 years

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Nothing about the valkyrie winning was believable, it’s really that simple..Three very out of shape, inexperienced women trained for a few weeks, and suddenly they’re proclaimed valkyrie? winning a competition that requires them to kill fully trained illyrian warriors and out survive them. oh and the bracelets helped them find eachother, and they also went to the mountain no one dares to go to, not even rhysand, azriel and cassian. this isn’t even being stated to shit on the girls I love the girls, but their storyline is the worst sarah has ever written, besides the triggering secret keeping baby storyline she came up with. every other storyline she’s written went smoother than this book. as an aspiring writer it’s actually embarrassing writing to have those girls win the rite, and no hate to anyone it’s just a laughable writing decision..if I were sarah I’d be embarrassed to even explain the ending of that book with the “valkyrie” if it’s ever brought up, they are adorable strong characters but they just have a horrible climax that made no sense 😕 it’s hard to even re read it. people who like, LOVE that book are real troopers. I wish I could enjoy the book, but it’s just a mess. All that sex, like 6 sex scenes, yet.. no conversation between the sisters or nesta and feyre (who is a big part of the reason why nesta had so much self loathing) but sjm had nestas main issues seem like it was her father and not being worthy of cassian..while her issue with feyre was in the backround 💀

I hope this next book isn’t a mess like this one was, and I hope she actually listens to constructive criticism because I have a sense this author is just in her own world and doesn’t care about criticism even if it’s justified. she’s probably living her best life, but I guess when you have so much success you can afford to have one kinda shitty book. i don’t mean to be mean but yeah. all the potential she has to ruin things by having bryce’s pov in prythian will be interesting to see. all CC is about is every character thirsting over bryce, acting like she is capable of being a “queen” and corny one liners “yeah boys we’re doing this screw you alphaholes I have a nail appointment” like???? I’m sorry 😭😭😭 I’m on the side of being optimistic but also filled with dread. no point though ik, she’s gonna write what she’s gonna write..

Nothing about the valkyrie winning was believable

*to you. It was believable to other people, the anons I got and myself included. It's fine if you weren't able to suspend your disbelief! We don't have to agree on this. I get where people are coming from, it's just not one of the issues that I really care about in acosf, I suppose.

I've definitely pointed out ways in which acosf fell flat for me, mainly in terms of plot. The Blood Rite is just one of those things that personally, made sense to me. There are things I look at harder in acosf than other things. The pregnancy plot clearly made no sense, we can all come up with 12 reasons why it was nonsense without even trying. The sex and alcohol thing... I hate. Hate hate hate.

Here's something, Nesta just happening to be at Emerie's the night she gets kidnapped? For some reason to me that's way more eyeroll-worthy than them winning the Rite. Actually I know why - it's because Nesta and Gwyn also being kidnapped relied 100% on coincidence, whereas they had been training for months to be Valkyries, and they had also passed the Qualifier in front of Declan. Darrow. Whatever his name is. Douchebag. Az and Cassian also set it up so that the Valkyries could take the Qualifier, meaning they had confidence they would complete it.

the bracelets helped them find eachother

This was set up though? Nesta wished on them, and we know she can make objects all powerful and stuff. This is why I am 99% that Gwyn will leave the library, btw, them finding one another was just one part of that wish. The other part was that they felt comfortable going out into the world when they were ready.

I have a sense this author is just in her own world and doesn’t care about criticism even if it’s justified.

Oh 10000%, sjm does what sjm wants to do, and yeah, that's great for her but some of us are looking around the room like John Travolta over here.

CC is about is every character thirsting over bryce

She drives me nuts 🙃 I hope that now sjm has all these pieces set up for the crossover between the two series, the plots will start to make more sense. If acosf was a mess in part because she was shoving pieces in so she could reference them later (e.g. Gwydion) then hopefully she's doing messing around now.

I am the same as you, optimistic but not holding my breath? I just figure this isn't the only series I read, there is plenty to keep me entertained in the meantime, and if things were better thought out then tbh, I probably wouldn't be on tumblr scratching my head trying to figure it all out every day.

#acosf #sjm critical #ask #anon #nesta #gwyn #emerie #blood rite #valkyries

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belle-keys · 3 years

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Incoherent thoughts about A Court of Silver Flames (2021) by SJM

Do not expect this to be a critical, unbiased review at all. Eet just ease what eet ease. Spoilers ahead laddies.

*unwanted preface*

Okay, so like, you know those things that are neither objectively perfect nor unproblematic yet you love them and are attached to them anyway? Yeah, this is me with SJM’s writing. See, I been with Sarah and Throne of Glass since March of 2015 and with ACOTAR since the summer of 2015 when I was 13 and honestly, ACOTAR in particular occupied a decent portion of my formative teen years. Eventually, when I was about 16 I sort of ended up getting distracted from YA books and went into my thot and kpop era. A main reason for this is that I found ACOFAS particularly disenchanting. This ain’t about that book (sigh) but let’s just say as much as I was still attached to and in love with the ACOTAR world, I was still able to get very annoyed by the decreased quality of the writing and also the evident projecting Sarah was doing onto Feyre with regards to her own life and experiences (ahem). No, the lack of developed POC in the book had nothing to do with it ironically.

So basically, since the spring of 2018 I haven’t read any SJM yet I never fell out of love with the books either. I’ve sworn off TOG after whatever the hell EOS was, but ACOTAR was always more special and close to my heart by tenfold, honestly. See, the best day of my 2016 was the day I found out ACOTAR was getting the extra 3 novels and 2 novellas. ACOFAS was a dumpster fire but I was actually surprised to really, really enjoy A Court of Silver Flames while it obviously has a couple (multiple) sus facets to it. The susness aside, I thoroughly felt at home reading Nesta’s book despite how irrational that might sound. No, I’m not here to say the book was objectively good but I’m here to say I still enjoyed it despite my love-hate relationship with SJM and her writing. :( :( :(

That being said imma still roast tf out of a couple aspects of it. :)

*the susness*

Aight wbk that SJM like, projects a lot onto feyrhys right. I’m not even gonna deny it. Like as horrible as it sounds, when feyrhys were, like, struggling as a couple and shit in ACOMAF, that’s when I loved them the most but then the shitstorm that was ACOWAR hit and they couldn’t go without boning every two seconds or calling each other mates and shit and basically every character in the book started kissing their asses (except Nesta) to the point where they were infallibly good and powerful and everyone’s heads were lodged up their asses... I got PISSED OFF then, right.

Now, in ACOSF (is that correct?), they were side characters and, gratefully, that romance between them was toned down. But here are some things concerning feyrhys and the Court of Dreams that irked tf out of me, and the implications that they had for Nesta (who is perhaps one of the baddest bitches ever) had me feeling homicidal towards the IC:

Every single time Nesta said shit about Rhys and then Cassian got mad I wanted to SCREAM like yooo let her roast tf out of him like yeah I get Rhys lowkey did a lot for her both directly and indirectly but cmoooooon not everyone needs to be riding his dick like the man HATED Nesta from the get-go. I loved the idea that someone in the book lowkey abhors Rhys just for the TEA it gave me. Like yeah, okay Cassian, I get that he’s your bro but he can SUCK NESTA’S DICK also like my girl is a DEATH GOD.

Here me out: the Inner Circle completely dehumanized Nesta, they completely disregarded her personal autonomy and caged her in which is ironically the very behavior that was villainized when Tamlin did it to Feyre. First of all they restricted her movement, they made decisions FOR her, they withheld from her knowledge about her own powers, they decided what’s best for her and acted like she was a rabid dog the entire time. Only Cassian and Azriel seem more blameless in this regard, but the level of scorn and abohorence and moralizing Feyre, Elain, Rhys, Amren and Mor did towards Nes made my blood boil. At the end of the day, the Inner Circle did the VERY THING they hated being done to Feyre. Whatever happened to the freedom they professed? The autonomy they decided all members of their court deserved? That was all bullshit, or was this switch-up SJM’s way of creating justifiable conflict between Nesta and the Inner Circle... either way, there was no closure about this and the way they dictated Nesta’s behavior whilst completely mistreating her imo.

More on Nesta’s treatment - okay listen the way the narrative had every character acting like Nesta was fricking scum and for WHAT??? Okay, she didn’t hunt when Feyre and they were poor, she was bitchy, she hates the Fae... okay, why is Nesta still being punished for her mistakes like this by the Court? Does their forgiveness only apply to those in their clique? They’re acting like her drinking and sleeping around and her general bitchy behavior is sooooo toxic when they ALL coped with their respective trauma in questionable ways in their centuries of living. And the narrative never condemned them for this behavior either... like cmon they had an “intervention” about Nesta like if she needed to reach a certain moral standing to be lovable or something. Seems to me that only Cassian was willing to love her, bruises and all... “There’s nothing broken to be fixed. You are helping yourself. Healing the parts of you that hurt too much - and perhaps hurt others too”. But as beautiful as that it, it seems the IC see Nesta’s healing as her “redemption arc” when I never saw her as a villain or monster to begin with. They acted like she had to become deserving of their acceptance. Bullshit.

No cus more on this... Cassian is the only person who defended Nesta, the only person that wanted to help her heal and grow when everyone else wanted to fix her. He was the only person who was kind to her from the original trilogy (i.e. not counting Emerie and Gwyn). He stood up for her and I’ll gush about them in the next section, but the dynamic between Nesta and the IC was the least enjoyable aspect of the book for me. It was clear SJM wanted to spur Nesta towards the path to healing yet only figured out how to do so whilst only keeping feyrhys as the nucleus of this arc, and so she had them force Nesta into her “special journey” (because she loves them so much, cus they’re sooooo perfect right *rolls eye*), yet, the narrative didn’t quite condemn them for their toxicity towards Nesta at ALL, even towards the end. The good thing is that Nesta did not become an ass-kisser throughout the story and laud them for “helping her” every waking second. Only Cassian didn’t shun her for her inner negativity but embraced her. And Az was pretty cool too, can’t hate him.

Ahem, the ending: okay, I’m not even capping, but I hated that Nesta lost her power for feyrhys. I get that she genuinely did it out of love and shit and I’m not even gonna lie, the thought of feyrhys dying had me on the verge of tears cus as much as I hate them, I also love those bitches. Yet, the culmination of Nesta’s power was, what?, to save feyrhys. This way, the narrative put Feyre at the center of Nesta’s narrative towards the end. And Nesta lost that Death God power that she basically EARNED in that Cauldron. This is the biggest flaw of the story. She fought against her own power to give it up... for Feyre. Like??? What??? Why was that baby arc even necessary????? Why was Nesta giving up her power necessary to fulfil her healing arc which was the POINT of the book??? Like what?????? It left a sour taste in my mouth. No- an abhorrent acidic bitter taste in my mouth.

Elain. I CANNOT STAND THIS GIRL. She completely abandoned Nesta and for WHAT??? For Feyre??? This only served to reiterate from the narrative’s POV that Nesta was scum and again, idk WHY. And also, why tf does this girl mistreat Lucien like this??? LUCIEN AKA MY FAVORITE CHARACTER???

I just don’t get how the narrative reiterated that Tamlin is the worst of the worst when you got Rhys hiding shit from Feyre, hiding knowledge of Nesta’s power from Nesta, all of that. Like, was the entire point of ACOMAF not for Feyre to embrace her power and become her best self? Rhys never for one second tolerated withholding Feyre’s power from her. So why tf does this apply to Nesta? Cus she’s unhealthy? Okay... so what??? Why villainize her like this and imply she’s undeserving of her power and a waste of life??? I’M LAUGHING SO HARD RN LIKE WHERE DID THIS EVEN COME FROM??? What did my girl do that was sooooo bad that yall needed to treat her like this. Tell me why feyre and amren and varian and rhys all acted like Tamlin in this book. Cardi voice WHAT WAS THE REASON. I AM SO MAD ABOUT THIS CUS THEY ACTED LIKE THE FRICKING MORALISING SYCHOPHANTS THEY CLAIM TO HATE.

Like bitch??? They’re like those youth pastors that reiterate how broken and messed up people with mental illness are? Acted like Nesta screwing guys was the worst thing ever when they should have embraced her? Like I get she would push them away but really??? “Waste of life”???

So we gon gloss over how Amren was insisting Nesta shut up about the baby business to Feyre (aka hiding shit from her)? How she was implying that Rhys should conquer all of Prythian? Hear me out, even as someone from a Caribbean country that was colonized by the whites, it actually doesn’t bother me when the theme of conquest comes up, like, this is a fantasy novel and colonization does not exist within the same context for me. That being said, like, it felt as if the narrative telling me lil Rhysie is just sooooo perfect that he needs to be High King. Like, I respect the fact that Rhys has no wish to do so. Homeboy never seemed to care for conquest beyond ensuring his Court’s prowess and safety so WHAT WAS THE REASON AMREN??? Like? What kinda crack was Amren on this entire book???

The worldbuilding... listen, the politics and history felt all over the place, felt incoherent and flat honestly. Didn’t bother me as much as it did in ACOWAR but it was just *meh*, not good. Not horrible, but not great. I preferred the world when it was directly the result of Beauty and the Beat and East of the Sun, West of the Moon.

The Fae have lost their *magic*: no cus what I loved about the first book was that the Fae were one with the Courts and felt very fleshed out in terms of their powers and shit, but now only Eric and Lucien and Tamlin and sometimes Rhys have that same magic for me. Like... the sensuality of the Fae in terms of their actual Celtic roots, that which felt whimsical and immersive in the first book, feels lost to me. I can’t explain it but I feel less nuance and orthodoxy in their portrayal. However, I DID love this one line featuring none other than the loml : “Amid the pink and white blossoms, the cold-faced Autumn Court heir looked truly faerie - as if he’d stepped out of the tree, and his one and only master was the earth itself”. LIKE I SALIVATED THAT IS MY MAN.

*good stuffs*

Okay let’s talk about the smut like I didn’t like the word choice as usual like quit with the euphemisms and say cock and goooooo. That being said like, okay, I like how she set up the physical dynamic between Nesta and Cassian cus the sex wasn’t some big romantic climactic build-up like how it was in acomaf like they were being NASTY from the get-go and I respect that drip. Like she did not cap on how porny the smut was and thank God it wasn’t some cliche romantic honeymoon type shit, like it was almost on the ao3 level of smutty goodness. All it was was missing was coarse language and hard kinks but in general, I liked the Nessian smut in this book more than the feyrhys smut in particularly ACOWAR and ACOFAS, like Nessian just do not cap.

Listen... you see that whole part when Nesta was like imagining how awesome it would be to dance Lucifer’s Bachata with Az and Cassian? Yeah, my girl just let her thoughts run wild. Like Nesta makes Feyre look naïve. Like you know how Tumblr porn in 2016 used to be with the aesthetic type shit? That’s Feyre, but Nesta is like on Pornhub level and it’s so fitting I was YELLIN lowkey. I feel like less importance was placed on how meaningful the sex and shit should be in the book and I respect that.

YOU SEE WHEN NESTA TOLD FEYRE ABOUT THE BABY!!! I WAS CHEERING HER ON. No cause they were being so nasty to Nesta especially Amren and then Feyre entered with all of her moralising shit like honey you KNOW damn well what you’re doing to Nesta is what you hate being done to you. Like damn right tell her, cus I could not STAND the double standard.

The whole training the women thing was a nice touch. It was kinda corny but also sweet. That being said, I laughed so hard when I realized how this entire book was Nesta’s quarter-life hippie rebirth where she learns to meditate and work out and read romance books and face her inner demons like this is some real New York college shit. All that was missing was a Starbucks.

Cassian. Man I love this man so much. No like he displayed peak dilf behavior. I think his attractiveness isn’t based on his bravery or his hotness but his humility man. Like he’s not a thot, he’s respectful, yet tough, yet contemplative. He’s contented with his life station yet wants to always be a better person yet is such a strong rock who really loves Nesta not despite her flaws but because they are part of her. I love the way he stood up to Rhys a lot, he didn’t shame her when she was awful to him, and he is protective (annoyingly so sometimes) but he really wanted her to empower herself. Their relationship isn’t perfect (I’m not in the mood to dissect the problematic aspects rn) but they were so sweet together and I didn’t expect to like them as much as I did back when they were lowkey a thing in ACOMAF.

The mates thing didn’t bother me cus I saw this shit coming since 2016. Yes, it’s cliche and annoying but the mates status also, like, has no meaning to me so it is what it is. Didn’t think they NEEDED to be mates but I was happy that them being mates wasn’t the core of the novel and it was secondary to Nesta’s individual healing journey.

Prepare for me to get sappy but another reason why I loved this novel was because it was a story of healing. :( :( :( The road to healing and growth in the emotional sense is always beautiful to me despite how flawed it often is when SJM writes it. I just felt really immersed in the emotional woes and eventual growth of Nesta despite my issues with the book and this is perhaps one of the main reasons that I found it beautiful, because healing as a theme is always beautiful and raw.

More of Nessian but like their relationship feels so real and raw too. No, cus like, it wasn’t tinged in as much fictitious idealism as feyrhys’ relationship was. They weren’t all stupidly in love and seeing each other in the universe and shit, like they just made each other happy and weren’t portrayed as the perfect soulmates who were each other’s yin and yang and whatever thank the LORD. Them having each other’s back was enough and ughhhh Cassian was just so sweet and such a good trainer and so aloof yet passionate like I been waiting to see more of him since ACOMAF so yayyy.

Okay... that scene where Rhys kneels to Nesta and she embraces him. yes. YES YES YES YES YES that shit was the shit that made my year like I want this man to be in her debt for the end of time like this hoe saved yall like big strong high lord better bow to the “witch” like I could hear angelic choirs at that scene like Rhys doesn’t just yield to people so easily so like, it was just kinda epic okay. Little bitchass Rhys with his perfect little river house and emo boi clothes stfu hoe.

No cus I love how Nesta told Cassian she didn’t wanna hear about Feyre’s special journey or Rhys’s special journey or Mor’s like I got fed up of people acting like they epitomized “good” and the “good path” to self-discovery when they can choke on a baguette as far as I am concerned.

*shit no one except me probs cares about*

Eris. So here is the thing. Since 2015 in ACOTAR when Eris was Under the Mountain being all red-headed and cunning and sexy and evil I have been obsessed with him... well, the idea of him I had in my head and how delectably abhorrent he seems (I like villains and side-characters okay). Maybe it was just his name (Eris is a hot name shut up) or the idea of a rich, cunning fox-faced prince in the same universe appealed to me. Either way, I actually never expected by favorite cameo-character to become... important. I’ll die on the hill of loving him. Here is the thing... I don’t want him to be good, in the same way I did not want Rhys to be a good guy in ACOTAR either. I don’t need him to be a secret angel, I don’t need him to be sweet and good like Rhys always was apparently. Honestly, I want him corrupt but likeable and pertinent to the story. That being said, I really want him as the main character for one of the upcoming novels sooo bad like please PLEASE let me see the autumn court and it’s two-facedness please like if not Eris then Lucien as the main character please.

Lucien... aka my fave character since the first book man. Mannn, SJM does homeboy so dirty like I have always loved Russian fables and hence, I am so ready for Lucien x Vassa x Jurian in the Vasilisa retelling with the firebird trope and Koshei. NO CUS in 2018 I was finna write a 100k word fic about this but then I forgot about it no cap, I still have the story plan in my Onenote actually but let us not reminisce. See, my ao3-loving ass wants an angsty poly relationship and also a hot Koshei I have been waiting YEARS for this you hoes, ever since Elain got the premonition of Vassa as a firebird in ACOWAR like God please please please give it to me and make it feyrhys-less as well yasss.

I lowkey wanna suspect Eris is gay and Mor, also gay, knows and that’s why she lowkey kinda tolerates him now. Yet, I cannot be sure and yeah I just wanna say that I kinda want that arc lmfaooo (my ao3-self is showing shut up).

No cus I was TEASED by only seeing a glimpse of Vassa and Jurian but THEY SHALL HAVE THEIR TIME I KNOW IT.

Tamlin living as a beast is so interesting to me. He’s a side-character now but ughhhh he was so mystical and interesting as our good ole Beauty and the Beast beastie like it’s sooooo mysterious and alluring how he’s becoming his own villainous legend like I still care about Tamlin’s blond ass self despite everything.

Give us the snowball fight scene you coward.

I just gotta say Nessian could outsmut Feyrhys any day and that makes me proud.

FRICKING AZRIEL like first of all Mor doesn’t NEED to come out until she’s ready but she gotta let the man down nicely some other way so he can move on. I do not like Elain. Never did. I still do not. I do not, frankly, want a whole novel where she and Azriel fall in love and she rejects Lucien like... okay, I DO want her to reject Lucien so he can be with Vassa at the very least but also I am not interested in Elain’s POV rn. BUT I WANT AZ’S POV AND LIKE WHAT THE HELL AM I SUPPOSED TO DO I WANT MY EMO BOI TO BE HAPPY. This is so frustrating cus Az is a walking DILF right and so, what am I supposed to do now.

I kinda miss the Spring Court just a little. It’s pretty shut up. It got that Zuhair Murad fashion too.

Umm like, what the hell is up with that business with Helion being Lucien’s dad? We need more on this which is why I want a Lucien POV book goddammit.

Yoooooooo yall remember that bitch from ACOWAR who hybern was finna kill and she had a name and everything and then there was some foreshadowing and shit? What’s up with her? Like I can’t even remember her name lowkey but yeah what’s up with that. Was it something like Briar or Briannon or somthing???

Is Mor getting a book? Like deadass I need the Lucien and Vassa book, I need the Eris book, I need the Mor book and I need the Azriel book. Damn. Been waiting 6 years for some of this shit.

Okay that is all for now. Yes, this book has problematic elements at every level but I still loved it yet also hated some things about it. I won’t read House of Blood and Earth nor will I finish the TOG series but I guess I’ll stick with this series which remains near and dear to my soul despite what people gotta say about it. It made me happy and that’s what matters. Nesta is a huge ass inspiration to me as a character and I still wanna see her make the Inner Circle’s life a living hell uwu. I admittedly got HELLA emotional reading this story because it’s nonetheless super meaningful to me even at age 19 and it’s really powerful for me as a comfort book, and I look forward (a little) to what this woman put out next... sort of.

Signing off! Don’t @ me (okay you CAN @ me but idc).

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copypastus · 12 days

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Day 5 of @tamlinweek - Masquerade

Why WERE the masks part of the curse anyway?

50 years worth of mask tan bonus.

#my art #acotar #acotar fanart #tamlin #lucien vanserra #feyre archeron #amarantha #prythian's best worst girl #tamlinweek2024 #love a fae queen and her convoluted curses #very whimsical #if random #as if a mask is gonna decrease a guy's hotness factor #just look at all the girls swooning over phantom of the opera #it's me i'm girls

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epochofbelief · 3 years

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Breath Control Chapter Two

here’s chapter two... unfortunately had to repost these first three chapters bc Tumblr deleted them or something!!

TWO

“Feyre. Have you done any work for the past hour we have been sitting here?”

Elain’s voice barely managed to penetrate my thoughts. I looked down at my textbook and shook my head. I had very bad cases of a hangover and a sour stomach. And embarrassment. And a broken heart.

Thriving.

“Will you please just talk to me?”

I’d met Elain at the library an hour ago, both of us planning to get some serious homework done before the week got started. I’d managed to tell Elain a little of what had happened last night but she hadn’t pried until now.

“I don’t think I can talk about it.”

She huffed out a breath. “Feyre. If anyone knows what it feels like to have a broken heart, it would be me. So maybe I could help if you’d just talk to me.”

That’s right. Elain’s ex-boyfriend, Grayson, had broken up with her unexpectedly over the summer. Elain, positive he would be the man she married, and subsequently being denied admissions to the nursing schools she was trying to get into for grad school, had been in bad shape for a couple of months. I wasn’t sure if she was really okay now, or if she was just better at hiding it. She’d attended Mortal University for her undergraduate degree and had wanted to stay there for her masters--and hadn’t gotten in. Luckily she’d applied to Prythian’s school and had been accepted, but it wasn’t where she had wanted to end up at all. Away from her friends and our father, she’d started nursing school at the same time I’d started my sophomore year and I was pretty sure I was her only friend.

Looked like she was my only friend, too.

I sighed. Then explained. Tamlin and Ianthe all over each other. My public humiliation. And Rhys, unexpectedly driving me home and taking care of me, which was probably the most unexplainable part of the entire night. I hated it, but Tamlin’s behavior had hurt me but not surprised me. I’d barely said two words to Rhys the entire time I’d been at Prythian. We had a big swim team, about sixty people strong. Rhys and his friends--Cassian, Amren, Azriel, and Mor--were all in the middle distance group. Tamlin and Ianthe were sprinters. I swam distance, for the most part. The different training groups and large numbers made it difficult to bond with every single team member, so I didn’t know Rhys or his group at all.

“Are you talking about Rhysand Night? That boy is hot.”

I did a double-take. That was a very brazen statement coming from Elain. “When have you ever even seen him?”

She raised her eyebrows. “I’ve been to your swim meets, you know. It’s easy to tell who has the best body and face from the stands.”

I groaned. “He saw me puke, Elain! I drunkenly poured my heart out to him. He must think I’m some kind of idiot. And now I am friendless on the team. Friendless. Especially after Rhys tells all his friends how pathetic I am.” I leaned over and put my face on my textbook. “I should quit now and cut my losses.”

Elain whacked me on the arm. “You most certainly will not quit! That beautiful boy was just--”

“Feyre?”

I stilled. If I hadn’t recognized that voice last night, I definitely did now. Positive my cheeks were a flaming red, I slowly sat up.

“Hey, Rhys,” I said meekly, my hand coming up in a very awkward wave. I shoved it back down.

“You ladies talking about beautiful boys? Surely no one around here, right?” He asked smoothly, folding his arms and leaning against a bookshelf.

Thank God Elain blushed for me. “Nobody you’d know.”

He raised his brows and I prayed he hadn’t heard anything else. “Hey, I was going to text you. . . Then I realized I didn’t have your number. You left your wallet in my car last night… I didn’t find it until this morning. It’s in my backpack. I can go grab it and bring it to you.”

I couldn’t believe I hadn’t even realized it was gone. “No, no, I’ll come with you. You don’t have to make another trip.” And ignoring his protests I jumped up and took off through the shelves. For some reason, I didn’t want him anywhere near Elain when she was casually throwing about the word “beautiful.” I scoffed. He wasn’t that attractive.

I was halfway through the stacks when I realized I didn’t actually know where I was going. “Uh…”

“All my friends are over there. Are you sure you don’t want me to just grab it for you and bring it to you here?”

I stopped in my tracks. I had the feeling he knew I wasn’t in the mood to speak to anyone right now. A mood I had been in for the past few months, but. . . I blew out a breath. “Um. Yeah. Thank you.”

He squeezed past me, and for a moment I found myself so close to him I could feel his body heat as he turned and sidestepped through the narrow space between me and the shelves. I could have sworn he was holding his breath as he passed, and I had to crane my neck to see his face. Our eyes met. I shivered.

Then he was gone. I blew out another breath and slumped against the shelf behind me. What was wrong with me? I’d been broken up with Tamlin for less than twenty-four hours and I was already noticing other guys. Disgusted with myself, I stared at the titles across from me.

Rhys was back in less than a minute, my wallet in his outstretched hand. I took it from him, taking extra care not to brush his hand with mine. “Thanks.”

I made to turn around and return to the safety of Elain’s aura when he reached out and brushed my shoulder. “Are you doing okay? You know, after everything?”

“You don’t have to worry about me, Rhys. You already made sure I got home okay.”

He crossed his arms. “Yeah but I’d kind of be an asshole if I didn’t at least check in. Now tell me. Are you okay?”

His gaze didn’t falter from mine as he looked at me. His gorgeous face was serious. He was really asking. He wanted a genuine answer. Good or bad, he wanted to know.

“No.”

And when I turned around, he let me go.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

The rest of the day passed in a blur. Elain and I spent six hours in the library and I skipped out on the girls’ team dinner, claiming I had homework. I spent the evening locked in my room, dreading the inevitable moment when I ran into Ianthe, who was, after all, my roommate. Bitch, I muttered under my breath.

It was eight o’clock and I had no plans for the rest of my evening, so I changed into my pajamas and flopped on the bed. Fully prepared to spend the night binging a TV show, I retrieved ice cream from my fridge and got under the covers. An hour into The Witcher, I got a text.

Rhysand Night: You’re going to practice in the morning, right?

I frowned. He was clearly texting the wrong person. And how did he have my number?

I opened the text and discovered that he had texted his phone from mine last night…

Me: I was planning on it

Rhysand Night: Just checking. I know you may not feel like going right now, but I don’t want to see you getting in trouble

Being a part of a college level swim team meant twenty hours of training a week. Practice at 5:30 in the morning most weekdays and again in the afternoon. I didn’t know why Rhys felt the need to check on me--missing practice meant getting chewed out by the head coach. If you missed more than one practice, you got suspended. No way would I blatantly take that risk.

Me: I’ll be there

I shut off my phone and went to bed.

----------------

I barely dragged myself out of practice the next morning. And the morning after that. And the morning after that. For two weeks after Halloween, I ignored Ianthe as much as humanly possible. She made no attempt to apologize. Tamlin had even kept his distance. I showed up at practice, swam (albeit poorly), went to class, went to practice, and went home. I was reaching new levels of anti-social. Elain was busy with study groups and classes and Nesta wouldn’t be in town for another week. She worked as a flight attendant and split her time between our father's and her and Elain’s shared place.

I just couldn’t bring myself to do anything besides school and swim. The fact that I had wasted a year of my life on Tamlin Spring was tearing me apart from the inside out. And breaking up with him had made me realize all of the things I had wasted my life on for the past year. Why was I pursuing a degree in exercise science when I loved literature and art? Why had I put all my effort into one friendship with a bitch who had stabbed me in the back at her first opportunity? I had no other friends on the swim team I had chosen during my recruitment process, thinking it was the “place for me.” I was in the wrong place, had chosen the wrong people, and was aiming for the wrong future. The worst part was, it was all my fault. My blindness had seeped into every part of my life and I barely knew who I was without my overbearing boyfriend and the friend who had steered me around for my entire college experience.

On Thursday morning, over a week and a half after the Halloween party, Coach King texted me to meet him in his office after my classes for the day were over. I hadn’t been able to stop thinking about it since. An impromptu meeting with Coach King usually implied a fate worse than death. At this point, I deserved anything he had to say to me. My grades had fallen in the past few weeks (I had failed a test on Monday and two quizzes since then) and my training had continued to worsen.

My suspicions proved correct when I arrived for the meeting and Coach King started explaining the reason he had called me to his office. He mentioned my grades and my training and the fact that I had barely spoken or shown any signs of life at practice for days. He wanted to know what was wrong. He wanted to know what he could do to help. But mostly, he wanted me to fix it--fast. Then he told me he was moving me to the middle distance training group.

“Wh--what?!”

Moving training groups in the middle of the year was unheard of. Potentially season-ending. If he was moving me from distance to middle distance, he was most likely saying I wouldn’t travel or compete for the rest of the year. It took time to adjust to a new training regimen.

I tried to protest, but he told me he had made his decision and felt I was more cut out for middle distance events anyway. The adjustment wouldn’t be too drastic. And he wanted me to take the rest of the week off and start fresh on Monday.

That’s the thing about college athletics. Coaches can be great coaches. They can get a team from nothing to something quick if they know what they’re doing. Some can even do that and help their swimmers develop as people, too. But for most coaches, when it came down to it, weakness was weakness, no matter the reason. And I was currently the weakest link on the team. Coach King had to do something about it and this was apparently the best he could come up with.

I mumbled something to Coach King about seeing the sports psychologist and trying harder at the new practices. I felt certain he had vague ideas about the couples on the team, so he probably knew about my Tamlin situation. I didn’t feel the need to mention it to him. I left his office and made it all the way down the five flights of stairs and out the back entrance into the cloudy, chilly afternoon before I allowed myself to cry.

I had messed up my life so royally that I had no idea how to fix it. I wouldn’t be surprised if Coach King kicked me off the team in a matter of weeks. We had a travel meet coming up, and I felt certain that I wouldn’t make the cut. I’d be stuck at Prythian U while all my teammates that I had developed no relationship with would travel.

Head down, I was rushing to my car as my tears fell when I ran headfirst into a warm body.

“Oh my gosh I’m so sorry--”

“We have to stop meeting like--Feyre.”

“Rhys.” I kept my eyes on the crack in the parking lot pavement at my feet.

“Are you okay?”

“You’ve got to stop asking me that question! I know you don’t care! Let me deal with this by myself.” I made to push past him but he followed me to my car anyways.

“Feyre. I do care. I’m your teammate. And it doesn’t seem like anybody else on the team is lining up to ask how you’re doing, so I’m here to do that. I want to help you.” Something in his voice made me pause, but I couldn’t figure out what it was.

“Just fuck off. You don’t even know me.”

He threw up his hands as I struggled to unlock my extremely old Volkswagen with the key fob. My tears and anger were making it very hard to open the door.

“For God’s sake, Feyre! Would you stop being so damn difficult and let someone help you? You’ve been a ghost at practice these past few weeks and Coach King just told me you were moving to my training group.”

I unlocked my car and wrenched it open. “Leave me alone.”

Rhys grabbed my car door and refused to let me close it. I glared at his stupid, gorgeous, violet eyes. “I bet you like this. An excuse to just give up, get yourself kicked off the team. Much easier than having to face Tamlin at practice everyday, much easier than having to make new friends.”

I narrowed my eyes. And slapped him across the face.

He touched his cheek. A spark of satisfaction lit up against the confusion and depression that lived within my gut. I had surprised him. And shut him up.

“Wow. I guess I deserved that. But you know I’m right.”

And the fact was, I did. He had said out loud what was going on deep inside me, what I was dangerously close to giving in to. I was shocked someone I barely knew could even begin to fathom what was going on so deep within my brain that I had yet to admit it to myself. But most of all, I was angry. Angry that this boy thought he had some sort of right to me pouring out my heart to him or at the very least accepting his help. He wasn’t a captain. He had no jurisdiction over me.

“Fine! You’re right! Are you happy now?” I wanted to wipe the smug look off his face. I cast around for something, anything to make him understand even a little bit what I was feeling. “Any other accusations you want to spit at me to make me hate myself more than I already do?”

His smirk fell. Satisfied once more, I thought he’d let me leave, but he held fast to my car door.

“Tell me what to do to help you. Tell me and I’ll do it.”

I blinked. I thought he would yell at me some more. I hadn’t expected such an open offer, more raw and entreating than anything Tamlin had ever said to me.

I hated that my year with Tamlin had made me think that a guy treating me nicely was a rare commodity. I deserved to be treated with more kindness than Tamlin had ever bestowed on me. I knew that, and yet--I didn’t know how to accept that kindness anymore. I was now so deeply confused about myself, my team, and Rhys that I merely stood there, staring at Rhys without really seeing him, and contemplating the nature of my existence for the past year.

Rhys, appearing to come to the conclusion that I had nothing to say in response to his entreaty, cleared his throat. “I know there’s a team party this weekend, as per usual. But my friends and I are going to hang out ourselves and stay sober since we have a meet the weekend after. I want you to come. In fact, I insist.”

I opened my mouth to protest, but he kept talking. “If you don’t show, I’ll tell the captains you haven’t actually been sick or studying during the past two team meetings you’ve missed. I’ll text you the address. Come. Please. We won’t talk about Tamlin or anything difficult. Plus, you should probably meet your new training group.”

That was right. Rhys and all his friends were in the middle distance group. I’d be subject to all of them starting Monday.

And because I couldn’t think of any excuse, because I couldn’t have the captains knowing the concrete truth about my absences, because maybe somewhere deep within me desired help, I agreed.

#feysand #feyre x rhysand #acomaf #a court of thorns and roses #fanfiction #acotar fanfiction #feysand modern au #feyre archeron #rhysand #high lord #night court #elriel

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cinaja · 4 years

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Before the Wall part 20

Masterlist

Summary: Five hundred years before Feyre Archeron is born, the world is much different from the one she lives in. Humans are slaves, seen as little more than animals by the Fae who rule. But things are beginning to change. Talks of rebellion is spreading and on the Continent, some Fae territories begin to consider the potential gain of War. All it takes is one spark and everything will explode.

----

The Autumn Court is beautiful, but its beauty is a strange one. The forest is full of colours, so vivid that Miryam barely knows where to look, yet the entire land seems laced with a scent of decay.

Absentmindedly, Miryam tugs at the sleeves of her dress, wishing she had brought something warmer. The Autumn Court is not cold by any means, but Miryam was born in a desert country. Next to her, Helion waves a hand and she is immediately warm.

“You okay?”, he whispers. Miryam nods, but he still gives her a questioning glance. “You seem worried.”

Well, what can I say? My lover is just meeting with one of Hybern`s deadliest generals and trying to seduce her. So yes, I may be slightly worried.

Before she can think of an excuse, though, the guards pull open the huge doors to High Lord Beron`s Forest House and she is able to step inside, Helion half a step behind her.

The wealth that greets her inside would be enough to make most people stop and gawk. Golden chandeliers, silk carpets on the walls, doors made of pure gold. Miryam only gives her surroundings half a glance before she continues walking. She does her best to ignore the guards trailing them, staring at her. All of them are High Fae, there is not a single faerie in sight. Mor`s warnings are ringing in her ears and make her senses go on high alert.

The walk to the throne room seems endless. Helion links his arm through hers and leans in to whisper into her ear, “A joyful place, right?”

Miryam smiles and nods. “Have you been here before?”, she asks.

“Once or twice.” Helion is grinning, but there is a tension in his face. Strange. Miryam doesn`t know of any tension between him and the Autumn Court, but she isn`t stupid enough to ask here, where the guards are sure to report their words back to Beron.

Finally, they reach the throne room. Two guards open the door for them and Miryam walks in, head held high.

High Lord Beron is sitting on a throne made of antlers at the end of the long throne room. His red hair looks like living flame, the red aura of his magic is glowing brightly around him. There is a cruel cast to his mouth, though, that has Miryam become even more cautious.

Miryam steps forward and inclines her head. “My Lord. Thank you for inviting us.”

Beron doesn`t reply. He just watches her. Sneers. Miryam holds his gaze.

“Look at that”, he finally drawls, “Is the Alliance running short of proper politicians, or is there another reason they are sending a child to represent them?”

“My Lord, I am-“, Miryam begins, but he cuts her off with a wave.

“I know who you are, girl. Don`t take me for stupid.”

She bristles. “If you know my name, then perhaps you should use it.”

“Careful”, Beron hisses, “I am a High Lord – I do not allow half-breed filth to talk down to me.”

Helion takes a step forward, but Miryam holds out a hand to stop him. She says, “And I am the emissary to the human-faerie Alliance. You`ll find that I do not take kindly to being insulted, either.”

Beron studies her for a few seconds. “A witch alright”, he says with a smile that sends a shiver running down Miryam`s spine. “We shall discuss business later. But first, allow me to show you the pleasures my court has to offer.”

He claps his hand and a band starts playing. Courtiers begin milling around. Beron turns to one of them without sparing Miryam another glance.

Helion laughs and links his arm through Miryam`s to lead her away. “Could have been worse. Do you want me to stay with you, or-“

“Go enjoy yourself”, Miryam says. She remembers Mor`s warning, but she doesn`t want to look weak in front of these people and hiding behind her Fae companion will certainly be seen as a sign of weakness.

Helion winks at her and vanishes amongst the assembled Fae. Miryam spends the next few minutes in tense conversations with courtiers who either look at her like she is a piece of dirt staining their pretty palace, or a particularly pleasant meal. Typical High Fae arrogance.

Finally, Miryam has had enough and pushes her way through the crowd to a quiet corner. From there, she has a good overview of the throne room. She spots Helion almost immediately. He is talking to a pretty Autumn Court female with red hair. Or rather flirting with her. He keeps casually touching her arm and smiling with enough heat to make the female blush. Only after a moment does Miryam recognize her as the Lady of Autumn. Indeed, Beron is watching the pair as well, his lips pressed together into a thin line. What in the Mother`s name is Helion thinking?

Miryam is about to go over and do her best to prevent a disaster when she gets the weird feeling of being watched. She looks around the room until her gaze settles on a young Autumn Court male whose aura marks him as the Heir of Autumn. Eris. When he notices Miryam`s attention, he smiles slightly and dips his chin. She frowns in return and he begins making his way through the crowd towards her.

Once he is standing in front of her, he bows to the waist. “May I have this dance, my Lady?”

“I`m sorry, but I do not dance.” At least not with you, you pig. It is a struggle to keep the disgust out of her voice. She tries not to think of Mor, or the part this male played in her suffering.

Eris smiles. “Make an exception. You won`t regret it.”

“The lady said she doesn`t dance.” Suddenly, Helion is standing next to her again. “You heard her.”

Eris smirks. “A pity”, he says and stalks off.

Miryam turns to Helion. “Thank you”, she says, “But I-“

“You could have handled yourself. I know.” He grins. “I would have expected nothing else of Miryam Godsblessed.”

“Oh, don`t call me that.” Bad enough that the soldiers keep whispering that name behind her back. Miryam sighs. “Well, I`m still glad you`re here.” She nudges him in the side. “How is flirting with our host`s wife in front of his entire court helping this diplomatic meeting?”

Helion gives her one of his dazzling smiles. “Oh, it is absolutely vital.”

Miryam arches an eyebrow. She doesn`t buy that swaggering bullshit for one second. Something is bothering Helion, she can tell. But before she can find a subtle way to ask, Lord Beron`s voice rings out over the crowd.

“Helion!”

They both turn to face the throne. The High Lord is holding out a letter.

“Your uncle is asking for your presence in Day. There appears to be an emergency.”

Helion frowns. He barely skims the letter Beron hands him, then turns to Miryam. “He says it`s important.”

“Go. Just don`t forget to pick me up later – if I get stuck in Prythian because of you, I`ll be pissed.”

“Thank you”, Helion says and rushes out of the room.

Miryam returns to her corner. It doesn`t take long, though, for trouble to find her. Eris Vanserra stops in front of her, an expectant expression on his face.

“What is it?”, Miryam asks.

“You still owe me a dance”, the male says, smirking.

“I told you: I don`t dance.”

“I don`t believe you. Why won`t you dance with me?”

Miryam hesitates, then says, “I`m friends with Morrigan.”

She wonders if she imagines Eris flinching. A second later, his arrogance is back. “A pity”, he drawls, “I thought you had class.” Miryam bristles, but he just laughs. “Come on, now, I`m your host`s son. Refusing to dance with me might be considered a slight.”

The worst part is, he is right. There`s no polite way for her to refuse. So Miryam grits her teeth, takes the hand he offers her and lets him lead her to the dance floor.

She almost immediately regrets it. Being this close to Eris, having him tough her, makes her skin prickle. His hands are on her waist, pulling her closer. Miryam`s first instinct is to push him away, but she can`t do that – it would be a political nightmare.

“Not so bad, is it?”, Eris drawls.

Then, he leans in closer until she can feel his breath on her neck. Miryam doesn`t think she`s breathing. She wonders how her feet are still moving when she is all but frozen with fear. Too close, too close, too close.

“Now, you listen to me”, Eris whispers into her ear, his voice so soft she can barely understand him, “And if you want to survive this night, I`d suggest you do exactly as I say. This is a trap.”

----

Jurian awkwardly sits down on a rock next to Clythia, but he makes sure that there is still lots of empty space between them. This female is a general in Hybern`s army. She slaughtered countless humans – his people – without mercy. If his spy`s reports are anything to go by, her sister and her delight in torturing humans before ending them. Yet, he is sitting next to her like nothing is wrong. His every instinct is roaring at him to draw his sword and just kill her.

“I know you`re hesitant”, Clythia says, breaking the silence.

“Not so much hesitant as confused.” And repulsed. “I got the impression that you don`t hold humans in the highest regard.”

Clythia waves a hand as if dismissing the comment. “You`re different. Not at all like the other mortals. They are worms, but you…”

It doesn`t seem to occur to her at all that Jurian might mind her insulting his people. That he might not want to be considered an exception or spend so much as a second in the presence of a female who considers his kind to be less than animals.

“What about me?”, he asks, hoping that his tone doesn`t show his anger.

“You belong with me.” At least she doesn`t say belong to me, but Jurian isn`t sure if she sees a difference. “I`ve seen it – seen it long before I ever heard your name. We will be together.”

She says it with such certainty that Jurian shivers slightly. If she`s a seer and she`s seen them being together… No, she has to be wrong. Or maybe she`s lying. This can`t be his future.

He pulls himself together. He`s a soldier, for Cauldron`s sake. This is just another mission. He shouldn`t let it get to him.

“Well”, he says, “what an interesting future. You may have heard, though, that I am in a relationship. Happily.”

Again, that dismissive hand wave. “Inconsequential.” Clythia smiles. “I`ve been a seer for three centuries now and believe me: The future does not lie.”

Jurian briefly considers her words. She is sure of herself. Obviously believes that she has won already. Jurian knows opponents like that. They are usually arrogant and don`t look past the first impression. Easy enough to trick. Even better, she doesn`t seem to consider that Jurian might be seriously opposed to the idea of this relationship.

As if to prove him right, Clythia puts her hand on his leg.

Jurian makes himself give her his best lazy smile. “Why don`t you show me what that future`s going to be like, then?”

----

“That`s not possible”, Miryam whispers. She keeps dancing, keeps her face neutral, even as her mind begins to race. “I`m a guest in his house – he wouldn`t dare harm me.” Not even Ravenia, for all her cruelty, ever broke that rule.

“Continental rules”, Eris replies, “They don`t hold as much sway here. And he doesn`t need to harm you himself – he can just stand by as others do.”

“Why?”

She can feel Eris sigh. “Is that really the pressing thing to discuss? We only have minutes!”

But Miryam still hesitates. She doesn`t trust Eris. He might well be lying and if she acts on his words only to find out that he was tricking her, it will be her who jeopardizes this alliance. If she acts and turns out to be wrong, it will be the biggest mistake she ever made as an emissary – it might cost her any standing she has within the Alliance.

“Why?”, she repeats.

Eris groans. He twirls her around, then pulls her close again. “The Loyalists offer quite generous terms – far better than anything the Alliance could give us. Your head is the asking price. I assume you know why.”

“What`s the plan?” Miryam has to keep from glancing around in the room to look for anything that seems out of place.

“That letter to Helion was forged – they wanted to get him out of the way. A group of soldiers will arrive to take you away in… five minutes.”

Miryam curses. If he`s saying the truth, she is really and truly in trouble. “What do I do?”, she breathes.

“On my note”, Eris says, “you will shove me away. Make a scene. Then, you storm out of the room. You need to go down two flights of stairs. There is a carpet with a huge deer on it. Behind it, you find a hidden room. Wait for me there.”

Miryam nods. They keep twirling around each other. Then, Eris pulls her close again.

“Now”, he whispers.

Miryam doesn`t hesitate. She shoves him away from her as hard as she can – which, given that he`s Fae and she`s not, barely makes him stumble. Around them, people stop dancing to stare at them. Miryam darts forward and slaps Eris. (She can`t quite contain a feeling of satisfaction at the surprise on his face.)

“You bastard”, she hisses, “How dare you touch me?”

She turns around to glower at the Fae who are snickering around them, then turns to Beron who is watching her from his throne.

“I need some fresh air”, she snaps.

Without waiting for a reply, she stalks out of the room. The guards at the doors do not stop her.

Instead of trying to go to the meeting place, Miryam lingers by the door. She paces like she is simply a female annoyed at some male`s behaviour during the party, but keeps shooting glances through the doors. She can`t leave – not without being absolutely sure that this is indeed a trap. It might be reckless, but anything else would be political suicide.

She doesn`t have to wait for long. Only a few minutes pass before a group of people appear in the middle of the throne room. All of them are armed and bearing the Black Land colours. Miryam stumbles back a step as she recognizes the male at the front.

Artax.

For a second, Miryam is frozen with old fear. Then, her instincts kick in. She spins around and runs. Thank the Cauldron, none of the guards reach out to stop her. Miryam dashes down the stairs. She already took the first flight when she realizes that she is going to lead Artax straight to the meeting place and if Eris isn`t waiting, she will be done for.

So instead, she turns to the right on the first landing and sprints down the corridor. She hears steps following behind her, almost lazily. She has nowhere to run and they know it. Artax probably enjoys the chase. She needs to buy herself some time, but how is she supposed to do that against the head of the Witcher`s Guild?

Miryam dashes around the next corner. The guards follow her with their eyes, but don`t move. Apparently, Beron`s twisted view of guest`s right means that his guards won`t touch her.

The next corridor is empty. Then, out of nowhere, a female steps into her way. She is dressed in servants` colours and marked as a faerie by the antlers poking out of her brown hair. It is too late for Miryam to jump aside – she crashes straight into the female. They both go crashing to the ground.

“Sorry”, Miryam gasps.

She pushes back to her feet, but then, she pauses. The female had to have come from somewhere. Indeed, there is a small door in the wall, almost invisible. The servant`s corridors, of course – those existed in the Black Land as well. Steps are approaching from behind. Miryam pushes the door open and slips through. She pulls it shut behind her the moment Artax rounds the corner.

The corridors much smaller and darker than the huge hallways of the palace. Miryam keeps running. At each crossroad, she takes a different turn. Soon, she is completely lost, but she can still hear steps following her. She looks back over her shoulder to see if Artax is already in sight, and –

Suddenly, the ground is gone from under her feet. Miryam barely has time to yelp before she is falling.

She lands in something soft. Clothes, Miryam realizes. She is lying in a pile of clothes. High above her, there is a hole in the ceiling – likely used by servants to dump the laundry into. Miryam quickly rolls to the side and presses herself against the wall.

It doesn`t take long for Artax` face to appear in the hole. Miryam doesn`t dare breath as he looks down onto the pile of clothes. After what seems like an eternity, he continues on the corridor. Miryam sags with relief.

Even though she got rid of her pursuers, it takes Miryam almost an hour to get to her meeting place with Eris. The Forest House is a maze and Miryam has to avoid anyone who might see her. She has just begun to believe that she`ll never find the hidden room when she rounds a corner and comes face to face with the carpet.

She pushes past it and into the room beyond. The carpet falls back into its place and a flame flickers to life – right in front of her face. It illuminates Eris`, who pushes off the wall he was leaning against.

“Finally”, he hisses, “I thought you had been caught.”

Miryam is shaking, but manages to glare at him. “Just take me out of here, please.”

“Not so fast”, Eris says and takes a step back. “First, I`d like to discuss my conditions.”

“Your what?”

“Well, I´m risking quite a lot by saving you. It would only be fair if you were to repay me.”

Miryam glances towards the door. She is sure Artax is still searching for her, and if he finds her here… “What do you want?”

“A favour”, he replies, “to be decided later.”

“No.” How stupid does he think she is? “You could ask anything. I won`t do it.”

“It will be within reason. And I don`t see how you have much of a choice. You can stay here, of course, but you`ll find that you`ll have a hard time winning this war if you`re dead.”

Miryam hesitates. Damn that male, he is right. “Nothing that harms the war effort”, she says.

“Alright.”

“And I won`t sleep with you.”

Eris snorts. “I honestly don`t know where you get the idea that I´d have an interest.” He holds out a hand. “Do we have a deal?”

There are steps approaching outside. It might just be guards – or it could be Artax.

“Yes”, she says and takes his hand. As soon as their fingers touch, he winnows them away.

They land in a forest that looks as old as this land. Miryam is shivering in her too-light dress. She doesn`t know where she thought Eris would take her, but she certainly didn`t expect this.

“Where are we?”

“The Middle. I´ll send word to Helion that he can pick you up here.”

Miryam nods. Something about this forest seems off, but she tries to tell herself that it can`t be so bad. She survived the trek through half the Continent on her own – she should be able to last a few hours here.

“Why?”, she asks, “Why save me?”

Eris gives her that insufferable smirk of his. “Your death would have been a waste. Alive, you may yet be useful.”

“Of course”, Miryam mutters, “How could I believe you`d ever help my for any reason other than your own gain.”

Any amusement vanishes from Eris` face. “I had my reasons. Back then, I mean.”

“You left a girl of seventeen in the forest to die. You truly believe any reasons you might have had make it fine?” Miryam hesitates for a heartbeat, then adds, “I thank you for your help, though.”

Eris gives her a mocking bow, then vanishes, leaving her alone in the forest.

----

A/N: I thought quite a lot about how to portray Eris. On one hand, it is made pretty clear that he is not as horrible as he seems. But I also really didn`t want to dismiss Mor`s suffering or excuse his actions, so I choose a middle ground (I mean, I don`t like him, so I wrote him as a kind of self-serving asshole, but still not as bad as his father.) I hope that worked out!

I also feel like I should probably tell you that I don`t write sex scenes. I don`t like reading them and I certainly don`t feel comfortable writing them, so all sex scenes in this book will be fade-to-black.

Tags: @sjm-things @herpowerisdeath @clolikescloquetas

#miryam #jurian #helion

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typicalmidnightsoul · 4 years

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Prythian Valley - Chapter 2

Family first?

A big belief amongst people is that until a body is found a missing victim is still alive. But what if the proof that they are dead is photographs of a lifeless body cruelly shared to haunt the minds of the victims loved ones? The murder of the Beddor’s didn’t start with Clare, it ended with her. In this story Nesta will have to ditch the Ice Queen’s crown and take on the guilt of losing her best friend.

Will one choice of Nesta’s mean death either way?

“Nesta! Nesta!”

Nesta’s eyes opened groggily to see Jonah shaking her awake.

“Hey Jo-Jo what do you need?”

She had come home and fallen asleep on the couch; she looked up at the clock, it read 5:45.

“We’re having a sleepover Nes, you said you’d pick up Nyx!”

She groaned reaching for her heels, “Has Eris dropped Caro off?”

He nodded and a small redhead came in the living room saying,

“Hi Nes,” Caroline smiled; she was Beron’s worst regret, Eris’ most important being and Clarissa Vanserra’s pride.

Nesta grinned at her, “Hey Caro, you settling in?”

She nodded and Nesta turned to Jonah,

“I’ll go pick up Nyx now and Alec should be arriving with Alis any minute so let them in ok?”

He nods ushering her out of the room.

She rolls her eyes and gets into her into her Chevy.

As she pulls up in front of the Narenz villa she sees a pair of excited blue eyes throwing the door open.

“You’re here!”

She ran into Nesta’s arms, as Azriel came out.

“Sorry Az,” she called out, “I fell asleep on the couch.”

He shook his head “it’s fine.” He looked down at Nyx,

“Don’t hassle Nesta too much, ok?” she nodded and Az turned to Nesta, laughing, “How long do you think this sleepover will go for?”

“Well it’s meant to be for 3 days, but considering the last one went on for a week, get ready for Nyx to call you in 3 days’ time begging to stay longer.”

He laughed and kissed Nyx’s cheek, “See you sis.”

Nyx rolled her eyes and got into the passenger seat, “Bye then.”

Nesta chuckled and gave Az a fleeting hug.

As she drove back to her villa she glanced at Nyx,

“So Nyxie, had your first kiss yet?”

“No, I’m just not feeling it with anyone.”

“Good girl,” she said, “First kisses are meant to be important.”

They were silent for a long time, until Nyx said,

“How did you cope?”

Nesta gave her a confused look, “Pardon?”

“When your dad died, and you’re mom went MIA and Feyre had to take care of your family, how did you cope?”

One of the reasons why Nesta loved children was because they were so outspoken, they stated things for how they were, and didn’t mince words. Nesta’s heart broke a bit as she remembered Rhys telling Feyre that he was trying to get Nyx to me their comatose mother in the hospital.

“I didn’t. I broke down completely, shutting out everyone. I wouldn’t have been able to come back if I didn’t have friends and siblings who pulled me out I don’t think I would be driving you today.”

Nesta looked at her, “Can I confide in you?”

Nyx nodded earnestly, “I know what it’s like to look for answers to beg the whole universe for them and never get any. I am grateful for my mom, and I know that I am so lucky to have her but sometimes I get so scared and one of the reasons why I hate Feyre was because she had promised mom she’d take care of us then… she just kind of took her place. And there will never be any-“

“Substitute for mom,” Nyx finished for her.

Nesta smiled despite the words being exchanged,

“My Aunt told me this when I was about your age, and now I’m telling you. The world is in desperate need of people like us. People who feel in extremes, the world needs to be reminded that not all females will put up with men’s bullshit, that we are freshly forged blades able to cut and will at any given chance. I let that die away once Nyxie. Don’t do that.”

She pulled up to Pop’s, Nyx tilted her head, “Um are we-“

“C’mon, I think we both deserve a shake after that.”

As they waited for their order, Nesta playfully tugged one of Nyx’s locks,

“Nyxie?”

“Yeah?”

“Will you go visit your mom? Please? I promise that Rhysand didn’t put me up for this, if anything he probably hates me too much to even talk to me.”

“You don’t know what it’s like to see her like that Nes, she looks like a-“

Nesta could hear the unsaid words, corpse.

Nesta held her hands, “Please, just put a hand on her heart to remember she’s alive, just healing. Talk to her. Let her know you’re there.”

It wasn’t until they were back in the car that Nyx said,

“When I go to visit her I’m going to tell her about you.”

Nesta smiled, when not if.

“Tell her how much I love you and that I can’t wait to meet her.”

----------

Nesta was doing her biology homework when she got a text from Adelaide.

Meet me in my study.

She groaned trudging down the stairs past the giggles and laughs in Jonas’s room.

She walked in going, “Yes mom?”

“Leona called, telling me you were planning to send Jonah to Chicago.”

Nesta inwardly groaned, “Uh, yeah. Forgot about that.”

“It is a good plan Nes, but how in hell are you going to get Jonah to agree to it?”

“He has to.”

“Forcing something like this on him will make him think of himself as a criminal.”

“That’s what the world will see him as if we don’t get him out of the Valley now.”

“Nesta how do we know he will be safe? Will people not think of him with suspiscion if he does leave?”

Nesta crossed her arms at her mother,

“Jonah is going to Chicago with Leo and that’s final. Leo will take care if him, she would never allow anything bad to happen to him.”

Her mother opened her mouth but the study door burst open,

“You can’t take Jonah away from me!” Nyx pleaded at Nesta.

But Jonah held up a hand and stepped toward his older sister.

There was fear, Nesta realized in her 14 year old brother’s silver eyes as he looked up at her and asked,

“Is it because I killed Tomas Mandray?”

Nyx gasped and Caroline who stood in the doorway dropped the phone in her hand.

Nesta looked around at the mess her brother had incited with 7 words. She looked down at him,

“Shush Jonah! You did no such thing!” she shook him slightly.

He moved out of her grip, “I did! My friends will understand if I tell them the truth.”

Caroline moved into the room,

“Tell us. Please.”

Nesta looked at her mother. Adelaide nodded.

Nesta ushered them closer,

“Tomas Mandray is a bad man. He tried to rape me.”

And there it was the motive simple and clear.

“He drugged me and tied me to a bed in a hotel room. Jonah had been looking for me and used the ‘find my friend’ app to track down my phone. Tomas’ gun was on the table and Jonah picked it up and pulled the trigger in order to save me. We had to clean up the scene so a friend of mine, Ronan, he disposed the body. We drove his truck into the river. The same truck that was found 2 days ago.”

Nyx and Caro were sitting in silence on either side of Jonah as he tried to gauge their reaction.

“That bastard deserved it.” Nyx said at last.

Nesta could feel the wave of relief that went through Jonah.

“I need your complete confidence, I know your brothers and Eris is deeply loyal to me,” she turned to Nyx, “As is Azriel. Trust me when I tell you that if explained to them they will not allow you to betray me.”

Caro and Nyx exchanged looks and turned to Nesta and nodded.

“Go finish your slumber party.”

They all sprinted off.

----

Cassian rolled his neck back. 2 hours had flown past as he finished his geography homework. He sensed a small figure behind him,

“Hey Nyx, you need something?”

He expected Nyx to snap at him, but he sure as hell didn’t expect her to say,

“Can Nesta trust you?”

Cassian sat up looking at her, “Nesta? Why-“

“What are you capable of doing for her?”

Nyx’s eyes were red and he answered her question, “I would do anything for her.”

“What I’m about to ask you…you can’t tell anyone.” She stood up straighter, “Or I’ll deny it and say it was for creative writing club.”

He nodded.

“If I told you Nesta was hurt almost hurt badly by a man what would you do?”

Cassian’s eyes took on a feral look, “You wouldn’t like it. He’d be dead by the time I was done.”

Nyx nodded and then said, “And if I told you my best friend did something terrible to protect his sister that is now tearing both siblings up?”

Cassian looked up, “Come sit here and tell me the whole story.”

----

It didn’t take Cassian long to find the wine red 1959 Chevrolet corvette c1that belonged to Nesta parked in front of Pop’s.

She came out in her cape coat and black heels. The air outside was hot and she stopped before her car taking off the cape coat and throwing it with the food in the passenger seat, revealing a short skirt and a tightly clinging white full sleeved shirt with black detailing on the cuffs and down the button line, a black string bow on top.

He silently walked towards her grabbing her figure and hauling her to the back of Pop’s.

“How dare you-“

Hazel eyes bore into hers. The same hazel eyes that lingered in her dreams, oh to say she knew the well would be an understatement. She drowned in them.

“Cassian this is no way-“

“Why didn’t you tell me?” his voice was pained.

Realization dawned on her face, “Nyx told you.”

“Only because Jonah has not been himself at school and she didn’t want to tell you because you’re already handling too much.”

Nesta’s eyes softened, “I…its ok.”

She tried to walk away before Cassian pressed his weight into her.

“Don’t you dare.”

He tilted her chin up, “Baby is this why you were crying?”

Nesta said quietly, “I have to protect Jonah. The way he protected me, the Mandray’s are a huge family if-“

“So are the Archeron’s… and the Narenz’s. We would’ve protected you, and Jonah…”

Nesta’s eyes hardened, “Try telling that to my guidance counsellor in LA who asked me ‘what I was wearing?’ and if I was ‘flirtatious in any way?’ and to ‘let it go, because it’s just sex.’”

Cassian gaped at her. “They- wha… they said that?”

The look on her face confirmed it.

“I’m so sorry, sweetheart.”

Nesta’s own arms wrapped around herself trying to keep from breaking.

She slowly pushed Cassian away saying she needed to go. He walked her to her car and then Cassian got a call.

He picked up, “Hey Feyre.”

“Hey, um could you come over? Like now please, Rhysand was here and he’s well… drunk off his ass and now he needs a ride home.”

Cassian rolled his eyes and Nesta snatched the phone from him,

“What happened to you revising for your test tomorrow Fey? You promised Mom that you’d practice tonight.”

Silence until, “CASSIAN HOW COULD YOU NOT TELL ME MY SISTER WAS RIGHT THERE!”

Cassian laughed saying, “You should go revise Feyre. I’m on my way.”

He cut the call glancing at Nesta, “Seems like I’ll be following you.”

Nesta shook her head and slid in the seat.

--------

As Cassian (not so delicately) shoved Rhys into the passenger seat, Feyre slightly shoved Nesta.

“Ask him!”

“No.”

“Please!!!” Feyre pouted.

“No!!”

“If you don’t I’ll tell Helion and that man is a devil so you have no idea what he might do.”

Nesta gaped at her little sister.

Cassian strode up to them, “You two ok?”

Feyre raised a brow and then said brightly, “Cassian! Nesta needs to ask you for a favour! I’ll go check on Rhys.”

Nesta tried to stifle her groan.

Cassian gave her a questioning look, “What do you need?”

“Helion forced me and my friends to join the school newspaper, and the article Luna and I were working on is contributing to Women’s day, so Feyre mentioned that you are sponsoring a shelter for Illyrian women, I was just wondering if you could maybe get us an interview with some of them?”

Cassian looked taken aback, “Um, yeah sure.”

Nesta gave him a tight smile, “Great! See you at the office first thing in the morning.”

She turned hoping that some vengeful bird shits on Feyre’s shoulder in the morning.

-------------------

Cassian knocked on the office door.

“Come in!”

He walked in, looking around. There were 4 desks in the middle joined so it looked like 3 sides of a rectangle.

Nesta was at the longer side talking to a guy who sat the side desk.

He sat in front of her, “Nice office.”

Nesta waved him off, “Credit goes to Helion. Anyway, Cassian meet Andras, Lucien’s boyfriend.”

Andras shook his hand, “Just call me Andy.”

“Andras is working on the Hero’s day article. He’ll be going around and talking to local heroes.”

Andras turned his chair to Cassian, “Captain I was thinking of trying out for the football team, and since you’re the jury…”

Cassian looked him up and down, “You have the physique, now it’s just about your performance.”

“So being Nesta’s friend won’t give me an easier path in?”

Cassian laughed as Nesta rolled her eyes, “No, but it’ll probably prevent me from kicking you out.”

At that minute Audrey stepped in,

“Nes, Principal Smith needs a word about the school drama.”

Nesta nodded, "Play nice boys.” She said as she stepped out.

The school was quiet, its occupants still not arrived considering the early hour. As Cassian leaned back Andras said,

“So… you and Nesta, huh?”

“I wish.” He mumbled.

“Any advice for try-outs?”

As Cassian gave him advice the caretaker stepped in wedging in a big envelope in the office’s postal rack. He left wordlessly.

Nesta came back in Audrey in tow. As she passed the rack she asked,

“Did this just come?”

“Uh…yeah,” Andras said.

“Nesta Archeron, Blue and Silver office.” She read out the front, ripping it open.

She took out an odd looking letter made from cut up magazine headlines and Newspaper letters. It said:

You once told me you hate repeating yourself.

You managed to save your sister once. Let’s see if you can repeat yourself and save her again. She’s in my clutches…

I will avenge my loved ones… My vengeance started when Clare came to meet me on the River banks. Blood flowed then and it will now.

The real question is will you, Nesta Archeron put

Family first?

Nesta put a hand over her mouth. Audrey’s hand came around her.

Andras and Cassian’s faces were etched with horror.

Andras pointed a shaky finger at the envelope where a bump was.

Nesta took the envelope, turned it over and shook it.

As Metal clanged on the table Nesta took a step back and let out a breathless sound.

Clare Beddor’s Locket given to her by Nesta on her Sweet sixteenth, where on one side was their friends and the other side a family portrait now lay on the table, blood coating it. A locket that came from a body which was never found. Only photos sent to Clare’s guardian, her aunt were the only evidence that Clare was dead.

But now… the locket meant…

It meant that this letter was sent by Clare’s killer.

Coming up next:

As they were in chemistry the sheriff, Thesan’s dad came in.

“Miss Archeron you’ll need to come with us.”

Beside her Thesan stood up.

“Why dad? You’re gonna take one of my best friends away like a criminal?”

Nesta held up a hand , “It’s fine Thesan I know why.”

“Why Nesta?” Luna asked as Audrey stood up.

“Because I’m guilty.”

Tags:: @skychild29 @aesthetics-11 @perseusannabeth @awesomelena555

#nessian fanfic #nessian #nesta archeron #cassian

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secretlynestaarcheron · 5 years

Note

Ohhh can we please please have nessian getting steamy and being discovered by the inner circle - specifically Amren who teases them endlessly

Unfortunately, I cannot write steamy things for the life of me, but I tried to do my best with the prompt since I thought it was a cute idea.

4 times the Inner Circle spotted Nessian being a couple without them actually being a couple

Feyre walked along the gardens Elain had tirelessly tended to over the years. Her work was breathtaking, Feyre had to admit that her sister had a natural gift for gardening, and deciding where each plant would thrive. She walked through the hedges, her sketchbook in her hand, looking around for some inspiration.

As she turned she spotted in the corner of her eyes a glimpse of black. Upon closer examination she realized it was Nesta. Walking towards her sister she realized that Nesta wasn’t alone.

“Is that all you’ve got?” Nesta taunts, crouching slightly and putting her hands in front of her face as Cassian launches towards her. She easily dodges him. “I swear, maybe you do need to go to the mountains again. All this rich food is making you slow.”

Feyre crouches down behind a hedge, watching as Cassian smiles and laughs. “Trust me, Nesta, there's nothing slow about me,” he retorts, to which she barks out a laugh.

Cocking an eyebrow up she smirks and asks, “Oh really? Nothing slow about you? I am sure some ladies in town could agree with that statement,” she laughs. Feyre smiles down towards her sister. She hadn’t heard her sister laugh in years. Since her father stopped being a father to them.

“That is not what I meant,” he growls playfully, but Feyre can see the slight red appear on his cheeks. “Now get your hands back up before I tackle you. Wouldn’t want to damage that pretty face.”

“Oh, so you think I am pretty,” she hums, but before she can say anything else he tackles her to the ground. She slams down with a loud humph. “Really? Stars, you really are fat.” She says, pushing him off of her but she isn’t trying very hard.

Cassian leans towards her and whispers something in her ear. Feyre can’t hear but based on the blush of her sisters cheeks and the way she pushes him off of her quickly it wasn’t anything to do with training in combat.

~*~

Mor yawns as she walks down the hallway, what better midnight snack than one of Azriel’s famous double chocolate chip cookies. She sneaks down the stairs, wincing at the creaking stars. She hears murmuring down below and the flickering of the candlelight. Peering around the corner she spots Nesta nustled into the corner of the couch, three blankets wrapped around her, a book in her hand. Cassian sprawled across the couch, his head on her lap, his own book in his hand. Nestas free hand was mindlessly running through Cassian’s hair.

Mor smiled at the two, sitting down on the stairs to watch the scene. It was rare when Cassian and Nesta weren’t at each other's throats. The only noise was the candle fire crackling and the flipping of pages.

“Nesta,” he murmurs, “Remind me never to switch books with you ever again.”

Nesta laughs softly, “Oh? Why? I for one am enjoying the battles of Prythian.” she pauses, and looks down at Cassian. “I think you’ve learned you actually love romances and your masculinity can’t handle the truth.”

He barks out a laugh and she shushes him quickly, “I am quite okay with my masculinity,” he reponses, his voice low, “but, she died. You made me read this novel, follow their story, just for her to die?”

She smiles, “You should read the one I finished this morning. It tears your heart out and stomps on it,” she muses, turning the page.

He shakes his head, “I don’t know how you do it,” he responses, “I don’t know what to do with myself anymore. The more I think about it the more emotion I start feeling.”

“Welcome to the world of reading,” she hums, running her hand through his hair again, as he wraps arm around her extended leg and scoots deeper into her side.

“Read to me?” he whispers.

Nesta rolls her eyes, but begins reading aloud. He sets his head back down and closes his eyes, a faint smile on his face. Mor smiles at the scene before her, she quietly goes back up the stairs. She could get some cookies tomorrow.

~*~

Elain walks towards the kitchen when she hears Nesta snap, “I am really not in the mood,” and then the back door slam shut. As she makes her way through the door, she spots Cassian, her sisters boyfriend (despite them both denying it constantly) leaning against the counter.

“Hey Elain,” he says in greeting, his tone not as friendly as it usually is. He runs a hand through his wild curly hair, “Your sister is going to be the death of me.”

Elain smiles, patting his arm comfortingly as she moves towards the fridge. “She is a piece of work, but she means well,” she responds softly, “She’s probably just upset about today.”

Cassian looks over at her, his eyebrows scrunched in concern. “What happened today?”

Elain sighs, Nesta didn’t tell him. She thought her sister was getting better about opening up but I guess there was still some things she didn’t want to tell him. “It’s the anniversary of our mothers death. It always hits her the most since she was the only one old enough to remember her,” she says, handing him a bag of Nesta’s favorite chocolates. “Go talk to her. She’ll say she wants to be alone but she doesn’t.”

“Thanks Elain,” he says, taking the chocolates from her and running out back. Elain grabs her own snack and makes her way up to her room. Hours later, she glances out her window to see them sitting in the back door by the flower arch. Nesta had obviously been crying, she says something to him. He lifts a hand wiping a tear from her face as he responds. She laughs, putting her head on his shoulder as he puts her arm around her. Elain smiled at the two, she was happy her sister found someone that was willing to break down the walls.

~*~

Amren rolled her eyes when she heard Nesta high pitch squeal. She wasn’t sure she’d ever heard the uptight stoic girl let out a noise like that before. “Cassian, stop it,” Nesta laughs loudly, “We won’t have any for the actual cake if you keep throwing it on me.”

Amren looks up from her seat at the dining room table, to see Nesta face covered in flour. “Already flying the white flag?” Cassian smirks, “I’d never seen you turn down a fight before, Nessie.”

“How many times have I told you to stop calling me Nessie,” Nesta replies, scooping up some of the cake batter and turns around flinging it at Cassian's face. It hits him in the cheek and slides down his face.

He laughs, “Wow, straight to the face,” he exclaims, shocked, placing a hand on his heart. “It’s on, Nesta Archeron, it’s so on.”

Amren sits back, pulling out her phone to send a video to the Inner Circle ( minus Cassian and Nesta which they named “Third Wheeling w/ Nessian” to which they all shared moments they were forced to third wheel with Nessian.)

Rhysand: That’s my kitchen. What are they doing to my kitchen.

Feyre: Is that my birthday cake they're ruining?

Cassian grunts, and Amren looks up to see Cassian on the floor groaning. “That was dirty, Nes, I never knew you played that way,” he moans, sitting up and glaring up at Nesta who was trying not to laugh.

“I didn’t throw butter on the floor, I think you did that when I cracked an egg on your head,” she says, reaching out the help him up. He pulls her down on top of him and she shoves him laughing. “Gross, you’re actually the worst.”

Amren snaps another picture, typing into the group chat, as they make their way upstairs joking and laughing loudly.

Rhysand: They better clean that all up.

Rhysand: And bleach my floor.

Send me prompts

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courteternal-rp · 4 years

Photo

→ general details

name ; lilith bloodwood

age ; 26

gender & sexuality ; cisfemale, bisexual

race ; made

do they hold a position or title? ; formerly Princess of Scythia ( the spare to the heir). As her families believes her dead (and has yet to be informed otherwise), she has dropped the title.

loyalty ; currently herself and the others who have been Made, though she will likely make a home within one of the courts

face claim ; nina dobrev

→ in depth

→ aesthetics

having a discussion with someone across the room without using words, standing in the rain, silk robes, breathless laughter, sweet talking your way out of things, midnight strolls, a dark imagination, breaking the heart of the ones you love, losing whats left of your humanity, playing upon others weaknesses, nightmare filled nights, unrelenting heartache, the smell of lilacs, hand written letters, lacy lingerie, tousled locks, a velvety singing voice that haunts your dreams

→ headcanons

one. Lilith has always enjoyed singing (it’s a talent her parents have always asked her to show off when meeting with potential marriage prospects). They’ve called her the Siren of Scythia - physically attractive and with a voice both beautiful and lulling, it was a title that simply seemed fitting. To have stolen her abilities as a daemati from the Cauldron - an ability that seems to quite literally put someone under her spell - is ironic and almost laughable to her.

two. despite having been Made several months ago, she has yet to send word to her family that she’s alive. while the bloodwood’s don’t particularly lean one way or another when it comes to their opinion on fae, she has a fear that should they discover that michael betrayed them and in turn forced her into his ploy that they may not trust her. it’s more a hunch then anything else, but at this point she’s stayed quiet for so long that revealing that she’s alive might also just hurt them. it’s something that is eating her up inside.

three. she hates being alone. it allows her the opportunity to think about everything that has transpired and that isn’t a path she’s quite ready to go down just yet. so she finds ways to keep busy - whether it be training, reading, exploring the courts or surrounding herself with people. night is undoubtedly the worst. lilith refuses to sleep unless she’s exhausted - as she’s been known to have incredibly vivid nightmares of her making. since her arrival under the mountain, her screams have caused several people (others who have been Made, her guard and even High Lords) to force their way into her rooms in attempt to get to her - their fear of her being harmed high.

→ powers

Powers. Daemati, winnowing.

Explanation. Lilith was born human, but upon being Made, she took something from the Cauldron. The apparent supercharging from her Making left her with the ability to shatter her brothers mind with little thought (all it required was the channeling of a very strong set of emotions). Her magical power store was fairly drained following the incident, and now that she’s calmed down, most things take effort.

Upon her arrival Under the Mountain, she began her official training - help being offered from several High Lords, High Fae and Made alike. She’s begun to practice building her mental shields, slithering past those of others, and attempting to force her desires onto them. While she holds an almost natural talent for it, the woman still finds herself exhausted by the end of the days. It’s a weakness many have commented on - if she is meant to force her way into someones mind to defend herself, she’ll be close to hopeless by the time she’s through (particularly as she has no other way to defend herself).

Right now, she’s very much at the beginning of her training and could be considered relatively weak (a stronger daemati could likely shred through her mental shields or trap her inside of their mind should they try). Time and training will be her biggest assistants when it comes to the growth of her ability. She will need to train physical and mental muscles to assist in holding a command and to avoid the exhaustion that follows.

In the future, once she reaches her peak, she will have the ability to rip past some of the strongest of mental shields, hold and shatter minds with minimal effort.

When it comes to winnowing, Lilith is still fairly naive. She’s managed short distances ( between rooms, or across a field ), but has not tried for anything terribly long. She’s found that this can easily drain her reserves and will leave her winded ( particularly when she does short jumps with someone ). Winnowing will prove far easier to train then her abilities as a daemati. Her biggest set back will be her inability to picture where she’s going, as she isn’t familiar with the internal layout of Prythian.

In the end, she’ll be able to move between places with ease so long as she’s traveling with a small number of people. Larger numbers will prove strenuous and will draw more heavily on her power reserve.

→ personality

positive. charming, knowledgeable, adaptable, compassionate, warm

negative. possessive, closed off, naive, deceptive

explanation. Whether or not she cared to admit it, Lilith had two personalities. One was her political face - used around her elder siblings and those deemed closer to her status. It was filled with self awareness, and a deceptive cunning that was typically found within the inner circles needy for power. It displayed the assets required of a leader - it was one that wasn’t easily swayed in its decision without persuasive facts.

The other was less of a face and more of a reality. Naturally charming, she thirsted for knowledge - most of which she found outside of books and on the streets speaking with the people of Scythia. Her warmth and compassion - and any attempt she had at trying to understand their way of life spoke volumes and earned herself an unofficial title as their advocator. She was the people’s person.

After her Making - that warmth dimmed. Wrecked with betrayal and anger, the negatives within her personality seemed to expand and gobble up bits and pieces that had once shined. Thrown into a new environment she isn’t terribly familiar with, but understanding there were still similarities to the political landscape she had left behind, Lilith is admittedly a bit lost as to where she fits in now.

→ biography

After several fruitless attempts to bear a spare to the heir, Lilith was finally brought into the world. A blessing in the eyes of her parents, she was the thing that had been required to solidify the Bloodwood line to the Scythia throne. Despite her status of spare - the upbringing she would have was near opposite of that of her elder sister. While her sister had strict expectations, those that formed around her were lenient.

Sneaking from lessons and spending countless hours wandering the countryside, the young curly haired girl soon became the figurehead of the Scythian people. As their biggest advocator - many arguments were sparked between the two young female Bloodwoods during their lessons (each believing they knew what was the best solution for any number of problems - each time butting heads).

It was these constant arguments that led her relationship with her sister to sour and for her desire for attention to be sought through her brothers. With her eldest brother favoring their sister, Lilith often found herself in the company of her youngest sibling, Michael. Though they grew to be thick as thieves, some of the complaints he voiced of their siblings (though many she could agree with), often concerned her. Attempting to keep peace between the Bloodwoods - at least for the sake of the people, she did her best to divert him.

As she aged and her beauty became more apparent, her parents added more to her lessons - hoping a natural talent would bloom for them to show off to potential suitors. Failing at first the harp, and later painting, it was singing that took. Becoming known as the Siren of Scythia - the hours she poured into lessons proved worthwhile when her parents secured a notable marriage for her with a bigger, more powerful kingdom. While she was friendly with her future husband, he was not the man she’d pictured spending her life with. So when Michael made it known he would be going on an expedition to the territory just south of Prythian, she jumped at the invitation he offered - believing he could see the distress in her eyes of needing just a bit more time as an unwed woman.

Despite her brothers insistence that her personal guard would not need to accompany them on their journey (claiming it would be nothing but safe and boring), the man stubbornly snuck aboard. Traveling by ship, they had sailed for several days before she was woken up in the middle of the night with a knock on her cabin door. Blurry eyed, she’d opened to door and muttering her discontent, followed the two familiar faced men to meet her brother. It was only when they reached the main deck that she begun to realize something was amiss. Another ship was alongside theirs - a gangplank connecting the two. And when it became apparent she was meant to board the unfamiliar ship, she resisted.

Dragged aboard and eventually shoved into the captains quarters, Lilith had fallen sharply on her knees - a pained breath leaving her lips. Dark orbs had risen and her entire frame had frozen at the sight of what lay before her. Fae - many fae - her brother, and a large, bubbling cauldron that seemed to whisper sweet nothings to all those present. With shaky legs, she’d stood and demanded to know what was going on. It was then her world turned upside down. Michael admitted his mutterings of discontent - one’s she had once foolishly brushed aside - had been pursued. A war was coming, he claimed, and he would be the one to lead them to victory. She was collateral - the people’s advocator and the test subject. Hybern and its king, refused to ally itself with humans. They would allow them to land in Scythia - their launching point for a war across the continent once Prythian was conquered - and in thanks, they would become immortal.

Staring in utter shock, it took two fae approaching her to snap into action. Screaming and clawing as if her life depended on it, Lilith fought to break free of the steadfast iron grip that encircled either of her biceps. It was not lost on her that the caring look in her brothers eyes had disappeared and in his place was an almost lifeless being, his interest only raising slightly when she was all but shoved into the cauldron. Icy liquid encased her, but before her head could be shoved beneath the surface she swore revenge.

Unaware of how much time passed, fingers eventually clasped around the lip of the Cauldron and she hauled herself to the surface with a heaving gasp. Senses assaulted by an onslaught of sharper sight and sound, Lilith was pulled and dropped from the cauldron with a thud. Shivering and trying to grasp the fact that her skin had taken on a dewy glow, she missed whatever words were exchanged between the fae and her brother.

The move between one boat and the next was a blur - but one moment she was on the ground, and the next she was being shoved into the arms of her guards (his face visibly bruised - as if he had been fighting to get to her when she’d initially begun screaming). Arms clutched around her shoulders - he had drawn her away from the fae’s ship as he silently checked her over for injury.

It was only when the Scythian vessel was again alone in the waters that anyone dared speak. The rage she’d felt ready to boil over with when shoved beneath the waters of the cauldron surfaced - her dark, newly immortal gaze turning toward her brother. Held back by her guard, growled words of hate were exchanged between the siblings before some dark tether within her pulled taut. Eyes locked firmly on the brother she’d once loved so readily, she shattered his mind. Body slackening and falling to the deck - his eyes blank and empty, the ship exploded into chaos.

While the crew scurried about like a chicken with its head cut off, her guard dutifully dragged her to one of the few lifeboats and cut them loose. Entirely clueless of where they were, he paddled them away from the Scythian vessel - his worried gaze ping ponging between her and their path.

At some point during their journey, Lilith fell asleep - the exhaustion of her Making finally catching up to her. When she woke - the sun was high overhead and their lifeboat had found its way to the shore. Silently, the pair wandered until they stumbled across a hut. Met by a pair of lesser fae, they were ushered inside and cared for until the High Lord made his appearance.

Brought back to the High Lords home, Lilith allowed her guard to do most of the talking. With the betrayal and brutal death of her brother still fresh on her mind, the princess only managed to provide bits and pieces of information to fill in the blanks - though as their conversation progressed, it became clear that the court was familiar with Hybern (the country that had all but turned her world upside down). Unaware if those that currently housed her were either entirely ignorant to Hyberns plans, or simply unwilling to be so forward with the former human Princess. Moving forward, each word was chosen carefully, if only to protect her people.

Her abilities were explained to her gently, and shortly after the pair were offered passage to Scythia. Horrified over the idea of returning home to face her parents and elder sister as a Fae (and the idea of having to explain what had transpired), Lilith refused. First offered refuge within the High Lords Court, and later Under the Mountain, the pair cautiously agreed.

It’s been nearly six months since she arrived Under the Mountain, and she’s spent a majority of her time avoiding any natives of Hybern (the General in particular). Instead, she’s vigorously invested her time into training her powers and exploring the Courts. Despite how much it hurts, she has slowly come to accept the fact that she no longer has a place in Scythia.

When Hybern’s true intentions came to light, the Wall was brought down and the powers of the High Lords all but reduced, a pool of guilt began to settle within her the pit of her stomach. Perhaps, had she been less cautious of speaking of the entirety of what had happened during her Making, Hybern would not have been successful in bringing down the Wall and potentially throwing the realms into a war. Now, she is determined to help protect her people from afar, and should she survive, she wishes to settle down and start a new in Prythian.

#amanda.#lilith.#taken.#female.#taken female.#made.#nina dobrev fc

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ughthatimagineblog · 6 years

Text

blush

cassian x (fem) reader

warnings; language, a very suggestive moment oml, acowar spoilers?, azriel and the reader were a thing for 2 seconds bc its canon azriel has had past lovers

prompt; reader is a princess at dawn but cass didn’t know lmao

requested; this prompt was an idea given to me by the lovely @sippy--sippy

word count; 5656

a/n; legit i spent two hours on this until 2 am and i got just a little carried away. 10 pages worth. love yall. sorry its so long also i have only read like the first two chapters of acofas that they offer at the end of acowar so bear with me

Living without a wall was hard. Humans were still terrified of Fae. And to be fair, they had a good reason. Just not four months ago, Prythian had defeated Hybern. Feyre and Rhysand had defeated Hybern. Everyone had taken hits, Rhys the worst of all. Rebuilding was hard as well. Even on the Fae side of things. Feyre was running non-stop meetings with other High Lords. Even some lesser fae to try and help volunteer for physical assistance. Hybern had destroyed a lot of land that needed physical rebuilding and she felt it was her task to help with that as well. Only occasionally Rhys would attend with her to help as well but he had his own High Lord things to do. Cassian occupied himself with helping Feyre rebuild and sometimes accompanying her with more ‘official’ meetings. The ones that didn’t talk of reconstruction of people’s villages or homes, rather the reconstruction and editing of a certain treaty. She frequently went to meet at the Dawn Court as Feyre found Thesan the more neutral High Lord. Until today, she had gone alone, sometimes taking Mor. But today would be different.

Today was a special meeting, Feyre would bring everyone with her, feeling their presence was needed. That included Rhys, Amren, Azriel, Mor and Cassian. “Now, I think Thesan and I can come to an agreement we will share with other High Lords when we get the chance, but it may take a while to organize the logistics of my idea so we will be staying in Dawn Court for a few days. We arrive today, get rest and the meeting starts tomorrow.” Feyre instructed everyone who was gathered in the town house kitchen. “What could be so important that you needed all of us there?” Amren spoke up, crunching on an apple. She winced a little. It appeared that regular food was still a very new concept to her. “Amren, you’re coming because you are much wiser than I am. And older. I have a feeling your opinion one what’s best, what technicalities to look at will be highly valued. Rhys is coming as another consultant. He’s also High Lord and has been a High Lord of Prythian for longer than I have been. Azriel, I need you to scout the Dawn Court before we arrive.” He nodded and vanished leaving little more than a cloud of smoke to dissipate behind him. “Cassian, you’re coming for protection. And Mor, you can work with Amren to help fact-check.” Feyre finished as everyone processed their new tasks. “Why would you need protection?” Cassian piped up. “I thought you trusted Thesan?” He asked. It wasn’t like him to question orders. He wasn’t really, just curious. Although, he did have some plans. A night on the town. He hadn’t gotten a break and the next few days he had nothing planned. Up until now. “Well, Thesan has told me Beron might arrive as well.” Everyone’s facial expressions changed. Everyone understood now. Feyre trusted Thesan. She was still wary of Beron. Mor was thankful she was given the task of ‘fact-checking’ with Amren. It would allow her to busy herself away from Beron or even Eris if he decided to show. They left the moment Azriel had returned with news that the palace was safe. Bags packed, each winnowed into the palace, the beautiful court looking as stunning as it did when they had their meeting just months ago. Before Hybern. Thesan greeted them. “Feyre. Good to see you again.” He smiled and welcomed her with a hug. He had grown warmer since the meeting. Feyre had seen a lot of Dawn Court in these past months, finding a new friend in Thesan, his Peregryn lover, his army and almost everyone residing at the palace.

Once inside, Cassian overheard Feyre inquiring about a princess and Cassian found it odd he had never heard of a princess in Dawn before. What was more shocking is that Rhys, Azriel and Mor were also concerned about where this ‘princess’ was. How was he the only one to not know? “Oh, she’s retired for the night. She’s spent all today preparing the palace for your visit and the day before, running around with our aerial legion helping out with citizens. She told me to inform you that she is terribly sorry she couldn’t greet you.” He informed them and Cassian noted Mor’s shoulders sagged a bit. “Well, that’s alright. She sounds like she needs the rest. She will be attending the meeting tomorrow, yes?” Rhys asked and Thesan smiled. “Yes of course, though, my money is that if Beron does show, she starts a fight with him within the first five minutes.” Mor giggled at this. “She does dislike the man greatly.” Feyre commented and Thesan laughed. “Yes, she is a handful. Amazing at being a princess for politics but when it comes to personal things, she tends to forget etiquette.” Thesan laughed and everyone else joined in. Their talk of the princess didn’t last much longer and therefore it lost Cassian’s immediate interest. He trudged his way back to his room and stared at the ceiling for a good while before drifting to sleep. Princess of Dawn Court. The words ran around his head, confusing him to no end. Even Mor knew. How could she not tell him?

He dreamt of her that night. He didn’t see her, though. She was always just out of his sight. Causing him to turn around just as she would run by and escape his peripheral. He was in the throne room of the palace. She hid behind one of the thrones. The one, Cass was sure, that belonged to her, only the faintest of a blush pink gown peeking out from behind the legs. He smirked, thinking he had caught her and would finally meet this mystery, but just as he reached her, there was nothing but a cloud of light pink, orange and lavender in her wake. A sunrise. He jolted when he heard laughing from the doorway. Azriel. Almost mocking him. This made Cassian even more annoyed. His brother. Keeping a secret from him? Now Cassian was jealous of Azriel. Like an odd twist of fate. Cassian began walking towards the shadowsinger just as he noticed the similar gown poking out from behind the warrior. Cassian touched Azriel to move him but just as he did so Azriel turned to shadows and the princess turned to that cloud. They floated away and intertwined and circled Cassian.

It made him spin as pink and black swirled around him. He remembered Bryaxis and his black and red cloud of nightmares. And of course, as the subconscious is the minds worse enemy, the cloud turned into just that, it’s darkness, Bryaxis’ evil, making an awful shushing noise. Cassian began to crouch as the shadows engulfed him, his heartbeat reaching an alarming rate. It was then he realized it was not making a noise, but words. “You will find her. Today.” It said, over and over. “Foolish warrior.” The words slipped and swirled around him overlapping to make the horrid noise he first perceived it to be. It was enough to make the war prince collapse to the floor, hands over his ears.

He woke up in a sweat, his sheets tangled around his naked form. He had kicked the comforter off of the bed, seemingly a while ago as he felt that they were cold. Stark contrast to his soaking, nearly steaming thin sheets. He shook his head, nearly ashamed to still have nightmares about Bryaxis. He was gone, no, he was on the loose, and clearly nowhere near this palace. But something inside him, something deep in his bones made him remember the thankful cries of the people in Velaris after the war had ended. They had called him fearless. And that small, deep part of him, wished he truly was.

Shaking his head, he strapped on his Illyrian leathers going for a little early morning training. It was nearly dawn. He decided now a better time than ever to get all worked up and sweaty. Well, more so than he already was. He just needed to blow off the nerves he had. He found the gardens soon enough, not bothering to wake anyone up to ask where the training room was. He began to swing at nothing, practicing upper cuts, balance, stance, etc. A few kicks here and there, using his wings to balance them out. Bryaxis, no, dream Bryaxis said he would meet her today. Which was nothing special. Of course he would, she was going to be at the meeting and so was he. He knew that already. He rationed this to himself in his mind, scoffing at how stupid he was to have been frightened by a dream. It was just a dream after all. He soon came to the explanation that Cassian already knew he would see the princess later today and therefore his subconscious was telling him not to worry. “Crazy fucked way of telling me not to worry.” He muttered to himself as he prepared for another kick. “I haven’t said a word, let alone tell you not to worry.” A voice came from behind him, surprising him enough to where his kick was botched, caused him to lose balance and fall flat on his back. He winced, trying to regain the air that just got knocked out of his lungs. Light, airy chuckling that made Cassian’s stomach flip sounded out behind him and he groaned as a young girl came into line of view. If he had to estimate in human years, she looked a few years younger than him. She was wearing training clothes. Tight pants of a russet color with mesh stripes of merigold, boots that reached the top of her shins of a similar color. They had slits up the sides, most likely for stylistic purposes and under them he saw gold. Her top was form fitting with a neckline similar to a halter but did cut low enough to show her bare collar. Well, it wasn’t exactly bare. There was a gold body chain that wrapped around her neck like a choker and ran down her midsection and separated in several sections. The top itself was that same gold, marigold color but this time it shone in the small light of the retreating moon and the sun that hadn’t even kissed the horizon yet. Similar plates lined her humerus in layers for protection. A cape of sheer light gold and orange draped off of one shoulder, nearly touching Cassian’s chest as she leaned over to offer a golden wrapped hand for assistance. Her arms were snaked in more gold, similar to his tattoos but he could tell these were temporary. They were sharp enough to be weapons yet didn’t cut her skin. “Y/N. You must be Cassian.” She laughed a small bit. He grinned, trying not to look so confused. His body’s reaction to her smile, that is what was confusing to him. It made his heart lunge and render his brain useless. She was stunning. Fae were supposed to be beautiful but she really was ethereal. He even noticed she was slightly sweaty. She was training. “I am. Nice to meet you. You’re up this early to train?” He asked and she smiled. “Yes, it is Dawn Court. Everyone here is kind of a morning person.” She joked and he found himself letting out a breath in a way of chuckling. She looked around, towards the East mainly. “We still have a few minutes before sunrise. Want to have a look around?” She offered and he nodded, feeling like a gentle giant next to her small form.

She showed him the palace’s vast gardens, weaving through the bushes and flowers and weeping willows on a small pathway. She told him of how she was the commander of their army. Their grounded army. One of the Peregryn’s commanded the aerial legion. She spoke of how she was constantly around sadness and fighting and pain so the gardens were her favorite part of living at the palace. So she lived there? Maybe she knows the princess. “Do you know the princess?” Cassian asked as sound of water in the distance reached his ears. She stopped smelling a flower to look at him, barely noticing the sun. A sliver of it was looking out beyond the horizon. “The princess?” She asked and he nodded. She smiled to herself. “I know the princess.” His eyes lit up at Y/N’s words and he asked more of the Princess. “Well, she’s very beautiful. But she doesn’t think so sometimes. Honestly, shes very smart but Thesan doesn’t see it. She can also be a little ditsy sometimes, kind of hating the role she has to play. I’m very close with her.” The young commander spoke. Y/N thought that if she hadn’t been the princess, she would have been sad to see Cassian’s obvious interest. But nonetheless, she was the princess and he would see in just a few hours. “Why are you so concerned?” Y/N decided to ask. She wanted to know if Cassian was more interested in title rather than personality.

“Well I never knew there was a princess! I just found out yesterday and I have been racking my mind non stop to try and think if I ever saw or heard of a princess before. So far I’ve come up empty. No one has told me.” He told Y/N and she believed him. He seemed genuinely baffled. “Well, you’re in luck,” She dove into the conversation again. “She has a type. She likes tall men with long hair and hazel eyes. You’re right up her alley.” She told Cassian and watched as his cheeks turned into the color the clouds were going to be in a few minutes. “I’ll put in a word for you.” She said, turning to face Cassian, only this made her look at the sun beyond him. It was a quarter of the way up. Her eyes flared and she gasped, grabbing his hand and turning to run.

“We have to go!” She shouted as Cassian found himself recovering from the whiplash of the moment. “You’ll miss it!” She shouted behind her to the big lug she was dragging by the hand. Cassian shouted back, chuckling. “Miss what?” He asked, getting distracted by her hand around his. It was small compared to his hand. He felt something warm start to form in his heart when he found the source of the water. It was like a giant pit in the ground except instead of dirt it was layers and layers of stones. Both rare and common. Water poured from the crevices in between each layer allowing the growth of the flora that nearly covered all of the rocks. Dozens of flowers that showed colors similar to a sunset were closed, waiting to bloom in the morning sun. A stone path led all the way to the bottom where there was a circular walkway of clean granite surrounded by the water that spilled into the bottom.

The water ran off in three different directions, Y/N explaining an underground watering system that helped water the rest of the garden from underneath. She led him to the center which was small. The pathway was wide enough for two Dawn Court people side by side. Cassian was not of the Dawn Court. He was large and burly. So he walked the circular path in awe at the waterfalls and flowers around him. He had not seen so many different kinds in his life. In the center of a circle there was a marble center that could only hold two at once. Y/N attempted to say something from the other side but Cassian couldn’t hear her. They silently worked out to meet in the middle. In theory it would work. In practice, they almost fell. Cassian caught Y/N just before she fell and chuckled as she held onto him seemingly for dear life. He smiled down at her, loving the way she seemed to smell of all of the flowers around him. As if their scent had all clung to her as she descended the path down and embedded itself into her skin, altering her natural scent to be that of those around her forever.

“I was going to say,” She said as she noticed their proximity. He was so close she felt his breath on her face. She knew, as a princess, it was inappropriate to be this close to him. But he didn’t know, and for once she was allowed to be herself without any preconceived notions. “That I helped plant most of these myself, helped them grow.” She left out the part where she used her royalty given magic to literally make them grow, but she did explain some of the flowers there. “Most of the green you see is Sedum. They are immune to heat and drought, but obviously they don’t have to worry about that here. They actually grow bigger each year on their own and require little care. “While we tried to even out the amount of flowers, the most popular planted are Delphiniums, Daylily’s and Asiatic Lily’s.” She told him and he smiled to himself. She loved flowers. “Now, I know I sound like a major green thumb, but really I wasn’t always like this. My mother actually loved to plant flowers and she used to want me to help her. Growing up, I wasn’t a huge fan of the outdoors and therefore never wanted to help her. But now that shes,” Y/N took a moment and Cassian saw the look in her eyes change. She looked up shyly at him before continuing. “Anyways, I keep this garden well cared for, for her and I’ve loved growing ever since. Some other flowers are Dianthus’, Bearded Iris’ and Peonies. They all bloom in the sunlight.” She told him with a large smile, gesturing around her. Cassian made a joke about her getting along with Elain. She explained she had not met Elain, even though she had, and how she had only heard of Feyre and Rhys. The sun was just fully above the horizon now, the bottom barely kissing the Earth, sending the sky into hues of blush, lavender and gold. The water reflected off of the sky. Cassian realized the bottom of the pool was made of mirror and some broken bits of mirror were also embedded into the rock around them for this reason. It turned the water the color of the sky. He understood why she loved it so much. They stood there and spoke for nearly another hour. She is beautiful. There is no one else more stunning than her. He thought to himself as they stood there. He thought that she should have been princess just on her personality and laugh and beauty alone. She spoke of palace guards and some of the other royals she knew, sometimes talking badly about them but this made her real to Cassian. She wasn’t a friend to everyone and wasn’t afraid to speak her mind. He was just about to ask her if she was seeing anyone when they heard shouting in the distance. People calling her name. “Shit!” She cursed and checked the sky. Cassian’s eyebrows raised but nonetheless he chuckled. It seemed she was late for something. “I’m sorry. I have to go. I would stay here forever if I could. Maybe I’ll see you later?” She offered, speaking frantically. “Will you be at the meeting later?” He asked and she smirked a little, seemingly less frantic for a moment. “Maybe.” Was the only answer she offered him before standing on her toes and pressing a kiss to his cheek and running off, ascending the way they came. She got about half way up when she stopped, confusing Cassian, and she ran back down. “Oh, and don’t come after me. Wait until you think I’m far enough away from the gardens.” She instructed him, gave him another kiss, and ran all the way back, disappearing behind the ledge at the top. She heard her yell out, “Coming! I’m coming!” Before her voice faded completely. Cassian’s hand touched his face where her lips had been, somehow mesmerised that he had spent an entire morning with this stranger. Not so much of a stranger anymore. After waiting for about five minutes in a trance, he ascended the walkway all the way back to his room, hoping he would see more of Y/N.

Cassian got ready for the meeting alone. He spent the entire shower contemplating what he believed in. Was love at first sight real? He already knew he liked her. Wanted to court her. Would she feel the same? When would he tell her? Cassian brushed these thoughts out of his mind by running his hands through his hair and shut off his shower with a forceful push. Cass arrived early, meeting up with Azriel, Feyre and Rhys right outside the meeting room. “Where were you this morning?” She asked. “I was out exploring the gardens with someone.” He smirked and Rhys looked nearly astonished. Azriel looked at him with a quizzical expression but said nothing. “Really? Who is this mystery girl?” Rhys inquired. “She’s the commander here. Not of the aerial legion. The ground army. If she’s here I’ll introduce you.” Cassian gave an innocent smile. Rhys gave Feyre a look and Azriel found it hard not to smirk himself. Cassian began to look puzzled which cued Feyre to shake the look off of her face. “I’m thrilled to meet her. She sounds like an interesting girl.” She took Cassians hand and patted it with her own. Rhys agreed and clapped Cassian on the back and Azriel just nodded. The trio prayed Y/N would play along as well, as she was approaching them now. Cassian turned just to see her in time to notice she had changed out of her fighting armor, had showered and had light makeup on. A thick, gold choker that pointed to her sternum and reached her shoulders hung around her neck. Sleeves did not attach to her dress but instead occupied most of her arm, stopping just below her armpits as the skin tight sangria colored fabric faded into gold that swirled and faded up her arm. That same dark purple-red color turned darker as it descended her forearm and stopped at her wrists. The dress itself was gorgeous. Strapless, that sangria color shone in the daylight and was tight and only reached her hips similar to a corset. The only odd part about it was right around her midsection there was a shield shaped opening that revealed the rest of the dress’ fabric. It was more of a neutral blush, slightly beige colored fabric that flowed and split down the sides.

The slit was as high as her hip and was more suggestive than Cassian would have suspected. Her feet were adorned in heels that snaked up her calves like golden snakes. Her hair was done to fit the type of cut and on one ear was a gold feather, accented to the small gold stud in her other one. She smiled at everyone, winking at Cassian, who literally tripped on his way to greet her. Azriel’s eyebrows shot up at his stumble as he brought Y/N over. “Hello, Cassian.” Y/N said, smiling up at him, her eyelids low. Cassian choked at the sound of his name on her sultry lips. She looked like a predator who’s prey was tripping in it’s own trap. Her eyes never left him even as his eyes could barely look at her without his cheeks turning red. Feyre and Rhys both had never seen Cassian so flustered. “Everyone,” Cassian began after regaining himself, clearing his throat and fidgeting with his siphon. “This is Y/N.” Cassian introduced the young woman and finally her eyes tore from his face. God, she knew she wanted him. When Y/N was sure Cassian wasn’t looking at her, she winked before ‘introducing’ herself to everyone. Feyre was willing to play along. “I am Feyre. High Lady of Night Court. This is my mate, Rhysand, High Lord of Night Court. This is Azriel,” Feyre introduced the shadowsinger Y/N had already met a thousand times and he smirked as he leaned forward and kissed her hand. He smirked under the dorsal side of her hand, knowing he was going to get a couple bruises from her for that later. Y/N and Azriel were actually quite good friends and a long time ago, hundreds of years, had been lovers for a singular night. She had seen Az loved Mor, also one of Y/N’s closest friends, and settled for being Az’s best friend instead. In her eyes, she enjoyed his company more that way.

Mor had walked into the hallway at this point and her eyes shone at the sight of Y/N the moment their gazes connected. Feyre must have sent her a message through her mind because Mor’s eyebrows went back down and she walked over, asking who this is. “Y/N. Commander of the ground legion here at Dawn.” She introduced herself. Mor shook her hand skeptically and looked to Cassian. Quickly putting two and two together, Mor’s eyes seemed to say ‘Oh!’ before smirking and introducing herself. It was a wonder Cassian hadn’t caught on by now, but he didn’t have time to dwell. Two guards emerged from the room chosen and informed everyone that the meeting would begin soon. Cassian had begun to filter into the room with everyone else but stopped when he noticed Y/N wasn’t following. “Y/N?” He asked, walking towards her, noticing more officials walk down the hallway. They were aways away and Y/N looked as though she was waiting for someone. “Go inside, I’m alright. I’m supposed to, uh, be here when the princess arrives. She’s always the last to show.” She explained and kissed Cassian on the cheek before he nodded, worried, but relented and went into the room. Cassian could have sworn he heard her arguing with someone just before the doors closed and Cassian took his seat. Cassian noted Beron and his sentries. No Eris. He was relieved. Mor didn’t need him to be here. The meeting began with Thesan. “As you all know, we are here to discuss a new idea for the treaty. Now there are many, many details to be worked out. We have brought Beron here because he is the closest to where the wall was before right next to Tamlin, who has declined to come.” Cassian saw Feyre fidget, just for a moment, in her seat. “If we come to a conclusion, we will share it with the other High Lords. But of course, not everyone is here yet. Please rise and welcome my cousin, Princess of Dawn Court,” Cassian rose with everyone as the doors opened behind him. Thesan’s arm extended to point behind Cassian and Azriel. Harps begun to play as the royal entered the room. Cassian turned around just as Thesan finished speaking. “Y/N.” Y/N entered the room, her fingers intertwined with each other as she walked through the room, her dress trailing behind her, as she took the empty seat next to Thesan. This time, her head was adorned with a small crown she had not been wearing moments before. Gold racing in between each other like vines, coming down to a point. No gems. Elegant but simple. Cassian swore he heard his jaw hit the floor. Seated not but three feet in front of him was the commander he met that morning, her hair sweaty in the dim light. ‘I have to be with the princess when she gets here’ my ass. She is the princess!

The meeting continued, charts splayed across the table sometimes finding new homes on the floor. Beron barely spoke and when he did, he wasn’t speaking from his ass but giving good advice. Cassian was too distracted to notice anyways. She had flirted with him. Opened up in front of him. Cursed in front of him. Kissed him and at one point, literally burped in front of him. Kissed him, albeit on the cheek, but kissed him nonetheless. Acted the opposite of a princess. Yet, here she was acting as poised as ever, as if she was a cut and press copy of a fairy tale. He watched her seemingly delicate hands cross over the maps, the papers, rough drafts as though they were glass. Be he knew how hard they could grip. How sloppy they could move. He knew how her soft lips felt when they were chapped on his cheek. Azriel leaned over and explained everything when he felt the meeting was beginning to wrap up. No conclusion but ideas were flowing. A proposal was made that Cassian didn’t hear. Azriel explained of him and the princess’ past and how it was over before it began. Cassian was angry at him for this but cooled a bit when Az explained she had never looked at him the way she did at Cassian. Azriel instructed him to go to her when it was over. She wasn’t untouchable and was single and could court people from other Courts. Cassian mulled this over that night, knowing now she would definitely be at dinner later. He really liked this beautiful girl. She was an angel. She was funny. She was kind. She wasn’t afraid to be judgemental and real and truthful. She wasn’t afraid to get her hands dirty. How could she find a partner in Cassian? Runt-of-the-litter, grown-up-in-a-dirt-camp Cassian? She had grown up in the palace, learning how to keep her elbows off the table during her three meals every day while he learned how to hold a spoon to efficiently get enough soup into his mouth while he was still caked in mud and rain?

At dinner, she had saved a spot especially for him next to her and Thesan had whispered his approval, making her blush. They talked again all night. She had felt no one else was at that dining table but them. At some point she had gotten food on her cheek and Cassian had reacted by instructing her to stop moving. This caused her to stop giggling, as well as the chatter of most of everyone else at the table. Thesan, Thesan’s lover, Feyre, Rhys, Azriel, Mor and Amren all watched as Cassian leaned in extremely close to the princess, took his thumb and wiped a bit of sauce that had somehow ended up on the side of her cheek. She looked up at him, her heart rate increasing at the intimate touch he had just given her. His thumb was still very close to her mouth. The whole world stopped around them as she carefully placed his thumb on the edge of her lips, closing her mouth around the finger tip and licking lightly. Cassian felt a shiver go down his spin as her tongue lightly brushed the pad of his finger, forgetting they, in fact, were not alone. Her eyes were dark looking up into his hazel ones, but the moment her lips released his thumb, she gave him a bright innocent smile and said, “All better.” She then returned to her food, frantically trying to use her powers to keep the burning sensation from reaching her cheeks. She had never been that bold. With anyone. Rhys had coughed and muttered something about the two of them needing a room as Thesan continued to pick at his plate uncomfortably. She had known Y/N since she was merely a child and to see her do that, something very adult like, he had been whipped with the realization she was not that child anymore. It was a very difficult thing to grasp, yet, he was doing his best to do so.

Cassian did not spend the night in his room. But in Y/N’s. They did not sleep together in a sexual sense, however they did spend most of the night talking about their lives. They shared their first real kiss that night and while they didn’t go all the way, Cassian woke up without a shirt the next morning. He remembered the last night as the princess, still in asleep in his arms, stirred. He had revealed small parts of him even Feyre did not know yet, and wouldn’t unless she decided to raid his mind. She fell for him that night and Cassian brought up the idea of courting her. She had decided that would be an amazing idea and the next day, Y/N told Thesan she would be visiting the Night Court when Cassian and the others would leave. Not forever, she had clarified. Just for a visit.

And visit she did. When in Velaris, Cassian flew her over the city at night. Showed her the House of Wind and the Rainbow of Velaris. He showed her what the sky looked like in the darkest part of the city and she had stared in awe at how beautiful it was. Cassian made a comment it wasn’t as stunning as her which caused her to cackle and eventually snort which in turn made Cassian burst out laughing. Normally it was embarrassing for her, but with Cassian, it felt normal. She felt at home. Suddenly Y/N recalled how Feyre felt at home in Velaris as well and she wondered if that was just an effect the city had on her. One look at Cassian told her it wasn’t Velaris that made her feel like she was home, but Cassian. Cassian was her home.

#Cassian x reader #cassian acotar x reader #cassian acotar #azriel #rhysand #rhys #feyre #mor #amren #acowar #acomaf #acotar #acotar imagines #thesan

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hellomehlo · 5 years

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Get To Know Me Tag!

It me - time for me to answer some questions!

1. what is your full name?: Emily (that’s all I’m gon’ share :D) 2. what are your nicknames?: Em 3. birthday?: november 2nd 4. what is your favorite book series?: A Court of Thorns and Roses series 5. do you believe in aliens or ghosts?: ghosts kinda sorta maybe? 6. who is your favorite author?: Sarah J Maas for ever and ever 7. what is your favorite radio station?: i don’t listen to the radio ha 8. what is your favorite flavor of anything?: Mint - spearmint, peppermint anything is yummmm 9. what word would you often use to describe something great or wonderful?: noice 10. what is your current favorite song?: the entire les miserables 10th anniversary dreamcast soundtrack 11. what is your favorite word?: yeet 12. what was the last song you listened to?: Prologue from Les Mis 10th Anniversary dreamcast soundtrack 13. what tv show would you recommend for everyone to watch?: Brooklyn Nine Nine and Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt 14. what is your favorite movie to watch when you’re feeling down?: Barbie movies (don’t judge me pls) 15. do you play video games?: yes 16. what is your biggest fear?: losing someone I love 17. what is your best quality, in your opinion?: uh, I’m optimistic? 18. what is your worst quality, in your opinion?: Perfectionism. 19. do you like cats or dogs better?: Don’t make me pick (but dogs probs) 20. what’s your favorite season?: summer 21. are you in a relationship?: nope. 22. what is something you miss from your childhood?: Being little enough to sit on my dad’s shoulders 23. who is your best friend?: One girl from my dance class - we’re both huuuuge theatre nerds 24. what is your eye color?: blue 25. what is your hair color?: reddish brown 26. who is someone you love? My ma 27. who is someone you trust?: see 26 28. who is someone you think about often?: see 26 29. are you currently excited about/for something?: I get to move interstate for university in a few weeks and I’m v excited 30. what is your biggest obsession?: Musical Theatre 31. what was your favorite tv show as a child?: Hi-5 32. who of the opposite gender can you tell anything to, if anyone?: My dad, I guess 33. are you superstitious?: A bit 34. do you have any unusual phobias?: what counts as unusual tho, idk probably not. Spiders are a pretty normal phobia? 35. do you prefer to be in front of the camera or behind it?: in front of the camera 36. what is your favorite hobby?: singin’ 37. what was the last book you read?: Clockwork Angel by Cassandra Clare 38. what was the last movie you watched?: Moonraker - James Bond 39. what musical instruments do you play, if any?: Piano, Violin, Guitar and Voice 40. what is your favorite animal?: Llamas (duh) 41. what are your top 5 tumblr blogs that you follow?: @gerbits @allieice @darlingimmafangirl @lemonywaffles @suddenlycowplants 42. what superpower do you wish you had?: The ability to manipulate rainbows 43. when and where do you feel most at peace?: On a holiday I went on recently to Indonesia, watching the sun set on a beach 44. what makes you smile?: The Trixie and Katya Show 45. what sports do you play, if any?: I dance :) 46. what is your favorite drink?: fruit smoothies 47. when was the last time you wrote a hand-written letter or note to somebody?: this morning - had to remind my brother to check his phone ‘cause I went out while he was still asleep 48. are you afraid of heights?: I’m not afraid of being up high, but I’m afraid of falling 49. what is your biggest pet peeve?: PEOPLE THAT USE INCORRECT GRAMMAR 50. have you ever been to a concert?: yes 51. are you vegan/vegetarian?: I’m like...a selective vegetarian. 52. when you were little, what did you want to be when you grew up?: A pop star, just like Hannah Montana 53. what fictional world would you like to live in?: Either Prythian from ACoTaR, or the Overwatch universe. 54. what is something you worry about?: EVERYTHING 55. are you scared of the dark?: yes 56. do you like to sing?: I do indeedy 57. have you ever skipped school?: Never by choice - but doctors and dentists love scheduling appointments in the middle of the school day grr grr 58. what is your favorite place on the planet?: in a theatre 59. where would you like to live?: Melbourne, or LA (I know it sounds cliche, but like kinda) 60. do you have any pets?: I used to have a fat goldfish but he died, aged 11 years old ;-; 61. are you more of an early bird or night owl?: night owl 62. do you like sunrises or sunsets better?: sunset 63. do you know how to drive?: Well I can legally and physically drive a car, but uh - I’ve been too busy in life to take my test, so I guess I’ll be on my Learner’s forever -_- 64. do you prefer earbuds or headphones?: depends on my mood 65. have you ever had braces?: yeaaaah, back in middle school 66. what is your favorite genre of music?: MUSICAL THEATRE 67. who is your hero?: my mum 68. do you read comic books?: no 69. what makes you the most angry?: PEOPLE USING BAD GRAMMAR 70. do you prefer to read on an electronic device or a real book?: real book 71. what is your favorite subject in school?: music, or the school musical 72. do you have any siblings?: yeh, one younger brother 73. what was the last thing you bought?: Online: a phone case that says ‘oh honey’ on the back (Trixie Mattel where u @ gurlllll) IRL: Oats 74. how tall are you?: 5′7 75. can you cook?: not to save my life, but I need to learn before i move away fml 76. what are three things that you love?: musical theatre, RuPaul’s Drag Race and Overwatch 77. what are three things that you hate?: stress, homophobia, the fact that they cancelled Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt after 4 seasons ;-; 78. do you have more female friends or male friends?: female 79. what is your sexual orientation?: straight/heterosexual 80. where do you currently live?: Australiaaaaaa 81. who was the last person you texted?: My group of theatre nerd friends 82. when was the last night you cried?: like a week ago when I went to a production of Les Mis starring heaps of my friends and I was so proud I cried 83. who is your favorite youtuber?: vixella/heyimbee 84. do you like to take selfies?: yeah! 85. what is your favorite app?: snapchat, youtube or netflix, can’t pick. 86. what is your relationship with your parent(s) like?: my mom is the best, and so is my dad! 87. what is your favorite foreign accent?: American, but that’s cause I have to use one for just about every musical I’m in 88. what is a place that you’ve never been to, but want to visit?: HARRY POTTER WORLD IN LA 89. what is your favorite number?: 8 90. can you juggle?: kinda, but not well enough to brag 91. are you religious?: idk at this point, kinda but not fully idk 92. do you find outer space or the deep ocean to be more interesting?: ocean - space scares me 93. do you consider yourself to be a daredevil?: fuck no 94. are you allergic to anything?: dust 95. can you curl your tongue?: mhm! 96. can you wiggle your ears?: no 97. how often do you admit that you were wrong about something?: I should more often than I do 98. do you prefer the forest or beach?: beach 99. what is your favorite piece of advice that anyone has ever given you?: You do you, girl. 100. are you a good liar?: I think I am, but my friends disagree 101. what is your hogwarts house?: Ravenclaw 102. do you talk to yourself?: yep 103. are you an introvert or extrovert?: ambivert 104. do you keep a journal/diary?: i’ve had one since I was 7, but I only write in it like once every 2 years 105. do you believe in second chances?: depends 106. if you found a wallet full of money on the ground, what would you do?: turn it in 107. do you believe people are capable of change?: yes 108. are you ticklish?: absolutely, but don’t do it 109. have you ever been on a plane?: yeah 110. do you have any piercings?: my ears are pierced 111. what fictional character do you wish was real?: RHYSAND FROM ACOTAR, GIMME GIMME 112. do you have any tattoos?: no, and don’t plan on getting any 113. what is the best decision that you’ve made in your life so far?: moving dance schools 114. do you believe in karma?: yes 115. do you wear glasses/contacts?: no 116. do you want children?: haven’t decided, probably tho 117. who is the smartest person you know?: my teachers 118. what is your most embarrassing memory?: tripping up the stairs onto a stage on my way to receive an award 119. have you ever pulled an all-nighter?: no 120. what color are most of your clothes?: navy blue, burgundy, black 121. do you like adventures?: sometimes 122. have you ever been on tv?: i’ve appeared on the news in advertisments for musicals I’m in, but I’ve never been interviewed ;-; 123. how old are you?: 18 124. what is your favorite quote?: “fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. Fool me three times...you’re a fucking idiot, change off widowmaker, I don’t wanna be sniped anymore.” - Muselk 125. do you prefer sweet or savory foods?: savoury

#non sims #hoooo boy this took me so long #enjoy

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