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#suddenly the day got so so much brighter
glearyyyne · 1 month
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we can't be friends (wait for your love)
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Part 2
Synopsis: Here you are at the Brighter Days Inc., hoping it would help you remove Satoru's memory in your fragile heart.
Word Count: 2,787 words
Warning: Heavy angst
Note: This was based on the mv of ariana's latest song, I felt like I need to make that version of the one and only it boy Gojo Satoru! This is best to read while listening to we can't be friends (wait for your love)
_____________________________________________________________
Pen clicking
You stared dully at the paper in front of you that was waiting to be sign. Your mind was all over the place the moment you walked inside with the stuff you used to cherish. With full determination, you decided to end things for your own good.
You have given extensive thought behind your decision and give "Brighter Days Inc." the exclusive permission to remove this person completely from your memory.
            ___ Yes            ___ No       
You sigh, dropping the pen as you try collecting your thoughts by staring at the box beside you that has all of the stuff you had with Gojo.
Satoru...
Oh how that name sounds so sweet yet painful.
Tears swell in your eyes reminiscing those elegant sapphire eyes that used to look at you with so much love that you missed.
Your eyes stumbled upon the white teddy bear, it was his first anniversary gift.
**
"Babe, look here" Satoru spoke with so much happiness.
You two were at the arcades, trying to have some fun after you two finished eating lunch together. "I bet you can't get that" You suddenly told him with a smirk. Satoru looked at you with his competitive look, "I bet you I can indeed get that" he said before putting a token inside the machine to start the claw machine.
The game was super easy, just try and claw a stuffed toy and bring it to where it was supposed to fall but this machine in front of you was known to scam people. That's what you taught, but Satoru proved you wrong.
With determination and focus he had when getting that teddy bear that only cost around a dollar to some store, he managed to safely get the teddy bear after so many tries.
Satoru's eyes widened when the claw didn't let go of the teddy bear when it was brought above as it safely held the teddy bear before dropping to where he could receive it. He screamed in joy not caring about the people around him.
"Darling! Look! I got it!" Satoru told you with a joyful tone as you giggled at his actions before he gave it to you. "Me? But you worked so hard just to get it" You said as you held the teddy bear with love.
"Yeah, but it shows how much I'll do anything to give you what you want" He said with those soft and loving eyes as if nothing else matters in this world just you and him.
**
When you heard your name being called, you stopped thinking about him as you touched your cheek when you felt a tear-stained. The nurse asked if you were ready to go. "A-ah just a second" you hurriedly said and hastily grabbed the pen to sign the paper.
You have given extensive thought behind your decision and give "Brighter Days Inc." the exclusive permission to remove this person completely from your memory.
          ✓ Yes            ___ No      
You stood up and gave the nurse the signed paper before grabbing the box and head inside the room. The doctor greeted you enthusiastically as he told you to give the nurse the box you were holding.
As soon as you gave her the box, you sat down on the treatment chair with anxiety creeping your body. Feeling your heart start to beat loudly as if fighting you to stop this nonsense.
"Is it your first time? I can see how your eyes move around" The doctor asked with his lightening laugh just to ease you up.
"Yeah, sorry I just really don't know how to calm myself" You said, fiddling your fingers to atleast help calm you down. "Don't worry actually what happens to most of our patients who came here for their first time" The doctor said while preparing the machine.
You looked at the table to see the box again, you felt as if your heart was screaming at you to stop this. 
“So who are you forgetting? We need to know so that we can ask you after this procedure is done” The doctor asked.
“Someone named Satoru Gojo” You were hesitant at first but you answered anyway.
"Don't worry, we'll give you those final moments with your memories before they disappear" The doctor assured you.
"Are you ready?" The doctor asked and with a final sigh, you nodded.
You closed your eyes as soon as you felt the doctor put something on your head. That's where the process begins.
DELETION PROCESS
     1%
**
"Satoru?" You softly spoke when you noticed those white hair that stood among the crowds as he turned around and smiled before waving at you.
He rushed up towards you with a grin, patting your hair leaving you groaning since you just finished brushing your hair. "Stop it! I just brushed my hair!" You whined, slapping Satoru's hand away with a glare.
He only giggled, "You just looked too cute" Satoru then took your bag. "I'll carry this, is there any place you want to see?" He asked.
"Should we go get some coffee?" You suggested.
"Sure, make sure mine is caramel macchiato with extra caramel" He said with a smile. "You and your sweet tooth" You said with a laugh.
"Well I can't really live without sugar and of course you my honey bunch" He said, wrapping his arm around you and pulling you close to him. You smiled while hugging him back.
**
Tears stained your eyes as you started to see your final moments with your memories.
  DELETION PROCESS
     24%
**
"Happy Birthday!" You flinched when Satoru suddenly surprised you in your shared apartment. The feeling of tiredness and burnt out suddenly left, a smile crept up on your face.
"You didn't have to" You said, dropping your bag to the ground before heading to Satoru. "I have to, because it's your birthday baby," Satoru said, holding the cake near you with the candles being lit already.
"Make a wish" He said
When you first observe how the cake was made, you can see how messy the font was made. It already says that it was Satoru who made the cake. You gently close your eyes and begin making a wish.
Let us stay together, tomorrow as well
You blew the candle with ease, but this is satoru we're talking of course chaos is on his vocabulary. He dumped the cake into your face after he made sure to put out the candle to not hurt you. You stood there in shock before grabbing a handful of cake as you threw it into his face leaving you two a giggling mess. You were curious as to what the cake tasted like. 
“I didn’t even get to taste the cake” You said with a pout after Satoru came back with a tissue to clean your face. “Don’t worry, I made two cakes, that cake earlier is just for fun” He said while wiping your cheeks. “And look! I got you a gift!” He said placing the box that was wrapped well into your lap. 
You stared at the box suspiciously before you slowly unwrapped the present. Sooner, you found what was inside the box that left you gasping in surprise. It’s the stethoscope you’ve been wanting to get after beginning your doctor journey. You stared at him flabbergasted.
He only smiled more and spoke, “Happy Birthday baby”. Tears swell in your eyes before you throw yourself to Satoru, hugging him while thanking him endlessly. He hugged you back, placing small kisses to your head.
**
DELETION PROCESS
48%
**
“I told you to leave me alone!” You shouted, crying hysterically while continuing to run in the rain without any shoes because all you wanted was to run away from Satoru.
But the moment Satoru was able to catch you by grabbing your arm and pulling you into a hug, you cried heavily into his chest. He made sure to take his jacket off to wrap it around you to stop you from shaking in the cold. 
You two stood there by the rain, Satoru was there hushing and comforting you to calm down.
“Shhh, baby, I know how much it hurts but it’s time to move on” Satoru spoke to you, “Toru, I can’t fucking move on knowing my mom died” you said as you stared at him with your red eyes.
“I know, I know but would your mom be happy knowing how her daughter cried in the middle of the rain that will definitely be the cause of your sickness the next day?” Satoru asked that you quickly shake your head.
“See, besides I promised your mom that I will take care of you and I hate it so much when you cry like this” Satoru admitted, his hand gently caressing your cheek. 
“I love you so much that it hurts me too when I see you like this” Satoru spoke in his broken voice.
From that moment, you saw how the usual chaotic, noisy Satoru is gone and it was replaced by this brokenness and pain evident from his face.
“Please, let’s head inside, I don’t want you to get sick” Satoru begged, you slowly stopped crying as you nodded.
Satoru sighs in relief, placing a gentle kiss on your forehead before holding you close as you two walk back to your shared apartment that night.
**
DELETION PROCESS
65%
**
“I told you to stay still!” You told Satoru as you giggled trying to stop him from wriggling much as you wanted to put the night cream on his face. 
“But my skin is already clean! I don't know why you wanted to add that to my gorgeous skin” Satoru said, lying down on his back as you tried to put skincare products on his face.
“Just do it for me please?” You begged with those puppy eyes that Satoru can't resist.
“Fine, but I better have my kisses after this!” Satoru demanded.
You smiled before leaning and placing a quick kiss on his lips, “that's all you're getting now” You said with a mischievous smirk.
Satoru only pouted while you continued painting his face with the skincare you were using.
After some time, you finished the night cream and grabbed one of your lip masks. Placing the mask on his lips, Satoru immediately took this chance and swallowed the lip mask only for him to choke.
“You got karma real quick” You said while laughing at him.
“That hurts my pride,” Satoru said while coughing.
“That's why I told you to stay still” You told him, grabbing another lip mask and placing it on his lips again. He stared at you, “Stay quiet for now” You told him with a smile as you took a book to read.
Satoru didn't do much so he closed his eyes to take a nap.
When you take a break from reading, you stare at Satoru with those loving eyes.
How lucky I am to get to be with you
 **
DELETION PROCESS 
78%
**
“What's your problem man?” Satoru spoke before punching the guy in the bar. 
You quickly jump into the scene as you try to stop Satoru, “Stop it! Satoru, we might get kicked out!” You frantically told him.
“I can't stop if he won't shut up about wanting to touch you!” Satoru shouted at you. You sigh as you apologize to the guy but it was too late, the both of you got kicked out of the bar.
“You need to learn how to control your temper, sometimes satoru” You annoyingly said.
“I just can't help it-” whatever satoru you always say that!” You snap at him.
Satoru only stood there, sighing as if he was tired.
“I’m tired, let's just go home” Satoru said but you weren't backing down.
“Oh no, no I’m most definitely tired Satoru! I have to deal with your ass whenever you get drunk!” You shouted in frustration as he was silent.
“I can't face you right now, you either stay with your family or friends for the night” You said as you quickly walked away, Satoru tried to stop you but you still left.
That's where the memory you wanted to rewind your actions as you didn't know this event will cause drastically to your relationship.
**
DELETION PROCESS
91%
The process moves slowly to all of the sweet times you had with gojo before it arrived, to how you two ended your relationship that you always had nightmares about it.
**
You stared completely shocked at what Satoru showed you.
a pregnancy test
Your eyes quickly moved to Satoru wanting him to explain everything.
Satoru only stared down, “I’m sorry, I got someone pregnant” he revealed that left you shaking.
W-what?
“Since when?” I asked, tears are already spilling from your eyes as your body went numb after consuming this information.
“The night we got into an argument after we got kicked out of the bar, I headed to another bar that time and-” Before Satoru could finish, you stopped him.
“You got some random girl pregnant?” You quickly cut him off. Your eyes looked at him to see if he at least felt guilty about what he did but…
There was none
“She’s not some random girl,” Satoru quickly defended.
“Oh, is that so?” You glared at him.
“Are you going to tell me that you fell out of love with me the moment she came into the picture? Is that it?” You angrily asked him.
Satoru only stared at you before nodding.
You sigh as you cover your face, it came too quickly.
“I’m sorry I couldn't keep my promise, I was just getting tired of the constant fighting we had and I think it's best for us to split,” Satoru spoke.
He didn't even show a slight guilt or sadness on his face.
Satoru only tried to hug you but you kept on punching his arm, once he did hug you your punch somehow got lessened only for you to cry loudly in his chest.
“I did love you, I didn't lie when I told you I loved you most of the time. I know I was a jerk for suddenly falling in love with someone but I can't help it” Satoru explained.
But no matter how many times he explained, he will never come back to you.
That day, Satoru left with all of his belongings leaving you alone in that shared apartment that was supposed to be your happy place.
You sat at the couch, staring at the wall trying to process everything, you looked at the picture frame that was from your graduation, and you can see how his eyes used to lighten up with you but now that eyes only looked at you with nothing.
You head to the bedroom and saw how clean it was, it felt so different to the one you’re used to.
You opened the closet to find your clothes only, but Satoru’s red scarf was there. Hands quickly grabbed them as you tried covering around your neck and just cried there.
Months later the news that Satoru and his girl got married, it was decided that you will remove him from your memories as soon as you see an advertisement that helps remove a certain person from your memory.
**
DELETION PROCESS
100%
The moment it hit one hundred, every memory with Satoru was soon replaced. 
The first anniversary gift he got was soon replaced by you hanging out with your friends as you got lucky to win a teddy bear in the claw machine.
Every time he always fetches you after your university was replaced with you walking alone.
Those sweet birthdays you had were replaced with your family celebrating it with you.
The night that you heard your mom died was replaced by your cousin comforting you instead of Satoru.
The bar memory you had was replaced with you fighting your friend for making you two kicked out of the bar.
The day when Satoru told you he got someone else pregnant? Was replaced with your best friend telling you she got pregnant.
Your eyes quickly opened as you looked around and touched your cheek wondering why you were crying. The doctor and nurse quickly went to your side and asked you if you were okay and were asking tons of questions about this person you don't even know.
You got out of the office feeling fresh and left the Brighter Days Inc not knowing the box you had was burned leaving nothing else, not even the scarf you used to comfort yourself after you and Satoru split.
You entirely forgot the person who you used to call your soulmate.
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scuderiahoney · 27 days
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a hockey au social media au / mini blurb
notes: this is my very first social media au! thank you so much to @theemporium for making the notification lockscreen for me, and @lightsoutletsgo for smau inspiration, tips, and encouragement! bunnyrabb1t is y/n’s instagram! think that’s all!
bunnyrabb1t
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liked by maxverstappen33, oscarpiastri and 56 others
bunnyrabb1t fall semester: ✔️
landonorris why
landonorris I look like a 5 year old on the first day of school
bunnyrabb1t the smartest 5 year old!!!
maxverstappen33 we are so proud of you son
landonorris I hate it here
charles_leclerc officially on bunny’s instagrammmm ✔️
carlossainz55 … where?
charles_leclerc on the ice!
carlossainz55 not sure that counts cabron
lilymhe the collage!! new project?
bunnyrabb1t maybeeeee
oscarpiastri great semester!
oscarpiastri cool pics!
oscarpiastri & a great grade in physics to top it off!
bunnyrabb1t look at us go!
landonorris
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liked by bunnyrabb1t, maxverstappen33 and 221 others
landonorris mood
maxverstappen33 mood
charles_leclerc mood
carlossainz55 mood
alex_albon moon
georgerussell63 *mood
alex_albon fuck off
bunnyrabb1t mood???
landonorris why so unsure?
oscarpiastri she doesn’t play hockey, she will never understand
bunnyrabb1t i hate it here
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The second he sees the notification that the grade has been posted, he texts you. He types and deletes and retypes the message at least a billion times. When he finally sends it, his heart is pounding harshly in his chest. He stares at the screen of his phone until his eyes burn. When it starts to buzz in his hand, he nearly jumps out of his skin.
“Hi,” he answers, hoping he sounds normal.
“Hey, Osc- is everything okay?” You ask, voice full of concern.
“Yeah, no, everything is fine,” he says, clearing his throat. “Sorry to bug you. I just saw that they posted the final grades for physics.”
You make a noise of distress, and he smiles softly at the sound. “Oh, god.”
“Thought we could check together?” He suggests, cringing at the way he says it and the idea itself. “I don’t know, I just thought maybe-“
“That would be really nice, actually,” you say, letting out a slow breath. “Let me go find my laptop, hold on.”
He waits on the line. He can hear you shuffling around in what’s probably your parent’s house. He wonders if you have a dog, or any pets. He’s never asked. He thinks of his family dog at home, who is staying with the dog sitter while his family visits him in the US this year, and something about that makes his chest hurt.
“Okay, I’ve got it, opening it now,” you say. “How’s your break been?”
He turns back to his own laptop on the desk. “It’s been good. Quiet, right now, because everyone’s at the hotel, but it’s been nice to have them here.”
“That’s awesome,” you say, sounding genuinely excited for him. “Got fun plans the next few days?”
“My mum makes the plans,” he replies, scrolling the wheel on his mouse absentmindedly. “I just roll with them.”
You laugh, and then he hears you sigh. “Okay. I’m logged in.”
“Ready?” He asks, quietly.
“No,” you sigh. “I don’t want to retake physics, Oscar.”
“You won’t have to,” he says, his cursor hovering over the View Final Grade button. “I know it.”
“Okay, okay, let’s just get it over with,” you say.
He wonders what you look like right now. He almost wishes he’d asked for a video call, because he finds that suddenly he misses seeing your face terribly. If he knows you well enough, you’re probably criss cross applesauce on the bed, lower lip pinched between your teeth, brows furrowed.
“Alright. Three, two, one…” he says.
He clicks the button. The screen lights up brighter, and he blinks. He’s got an A, no plus or minus, but it’s good enough. He’s happy about it. Then he hears you let out a long, slow breath, and his stomach sinks.
“What’s the verdict?” He asks, quietly.
You’re quiet for a few moments, and then you say, “B plus. Holy shit! I mean, I know it’s not an A but- I really thought I was going to fail-“
Oscar lets out a breath, then. “Fuck yeah! B plus is great!”
“A B plus means I don’t have to retake physics,” you say, and Oscar laughs.
“I knew you’d be fine,” he says, heading over to sit on his bed.
“Yeah, yeah, you told me so.” You say. “Couldn’t have done it without you, y’know.”
He flops onto his back on the bed, feeling his cheeks go red. Maybe it is for the best that it’s not a video call. “Yeah, you could’ve,” he says. “But it was nice to have a study buddy.”
You laugh at that. He thinks he can almost hear you rolling your eyes. He feels the silence stretch on for a few seconds- it’s comfortable silence, but the reason he called is over now. He doesn’t want to hang up. He wants to keep talking.
“Got any fun plans?” He asks, and when you launch into your answer, he smiles.
The conversation goes on for nearly an hour, by the time it’s all said and done. He stares at his ceiling and listens to your voice, chiming in when he’s needed or when he has something to add. But mostly, it’s nice to just listen. He��s missed hearing what you’re up to.
When you hang up, it’s with a promise to talk soon. The beep of the call ending makes his heart feel just a little heavy. He falls asleep with his phone still in his hand, and hopes he wakes up to a notification from you.
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bunnyrabb1t added to their story
landonorris replied to your story: safe flight!
bunnyrabb1t thanks lan!
maxverstappen33 replied to your story: just remember the plane is in pudding!
bunnyrabb1t jello, max. but thanks. see you soon!
oscarpiastri replied to your story: safe travels! headed back to campus?
bunnyrabb1t yes!
bunnyrabb1t if you’re free we should hang out tomorrow?
oscarpiastri I am so free and so bored
bunnyrabb1t good news i’m great at curing boredom
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maxverstappen33 added to their story
landonorris replied to your story: reppin the team even on break that’s our girl!
maxverstappen33 she said “ew stop” 🤢
landonorris yeah. that tracks
oscarpiastri replied to your story: Can you guys hurry back with the snacks?
maxverstappen 🙄
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bunnyrabb1t added to their story
oscarpiastri liked your story
alex_albon replied to your story: can I have my girlfriend back?
bunnyrabb1t hold on let me ask
bunnyrabb1t she says my cooking’s better. soz albono
alex_albon :(
maxverstappen33 replied to your story: no invite?? 😔
bunnyrabb1t max in what world is this something you want to be invited to
maxverstappen33 I made so many collages with you while you were injured 😔
bunnyrabb1t this is a vision board not a collage
maxverstappen33 they look similar to me 😔
bunnyrabb1t they’re different. but we can make one the next time i come over
maxverstappen33 😌
find part 4 here!
main taglist: @4-mula1 @celestialams @struggling-with-delia @lovekt @i-wish-this-was-me @forzalando @iloveyou3000morgan @callsign-scully @arian-directioner @racingheartsposts @sakuramxchii @mynamejeff5
series taglist: @sourskywalker @ivyvlair @gwginnyweasley @annispamz @bearlul @aresriiots @ggaslyp1 @verstoppenheimer @black-fireproofs @smilinlemon @arieslost @floralkoi @vicurious28 @likedbygaslyy @rorabelle15 @bwormie @treatallwithkindness @fandomnerd11 @adhxmoony @sakuramxchii @insunia @mindflay3r @talking-raw @colmathgames2 @assholeinatrenchcoat t @saachiep81 @venusacrossthestars @v1naco @anthonylockwoodandco111 @whalebursoot-main @ellen3101 @k-pevensie28 @ninifee1802 @avg-golden-retriever @pleasecallmeunhinged @andruuu28 @aceofwordsandarrows @dreamsarebig @secretunnels @ginsengi @yayahnaise @f1petra @lovecarsgoingvroom
490 notes · View notes
ellecdc · 1 month
Note
Soooo, I'm not the usual requester of the poly!moonwater x reader, but I fell I love with them and the way you write them!
With that being said, could I request Mia and Monty taking in Regulus and reader, saving them from their cruel families, and the holidays being absolutely hectic with everyone there.
Maybe some Mia and reader bonding?
If not that's fine! All my love,
🦕
*gasps* thank you lovely! I'm so glad you've loved moonwater enough to submit a request!!! sorry this took so long, I had this half finished and couldn't figure out for the life of me how to wrap it up happily, and then I was like "of course! Effie!" - not so much chaos but a lot of hurt/comfort and fluff
~please note: my requests are currently closed as I work through my older ones~
poly!moonwater x fem!reader
CW: toxic/abusive family dynamics, mentions and insinuations of abuse, your parents suck in this - I'm sorry, but just call me Euphemia Potter because you're all my children now
Remus had to admit that he was getting increasingly worried about you and Regulus the closer it got to the summer holidays. It seemed that no matter how much brighter the weather became outside, clouds were determined to follow the two of you around.
Remus only knew why Regulus would perhaps grow tense at the thought of returning to 12 Grimmauld Place on account of Remus’ years’ long friendship with Sirius. But the youngest Black, since reconciling with his older brother, has staunchly refused to discuss family life. Remus could accept that; he understood the gist.
But you, he was at a loss with. Though, he would admit that your occasional flinch at a raised hand or sudden quick movements by either Regulus or Remus spoke volumes on that end.
So here you all were (being Remus, you, Regulus, Sirius, James, Peter, and Lily) sitting by the Black Lake and enjoying the sun on one of the last few days of the school year, and you and Regulus were nearly comatose in your melancholy. 
Lily and Peter were doing their best to pretend they didn’t notice any tension in the group as they busied themselves with a game of wizarding chess, but James and Sirius had no such qualms and were staring hard between Remus and Regulus. 
“I told you that you could come with me, Reggie.” Sirius said surprisingly softly for the oldest Black. Regulus’ jaw twitched as he stole a fleeting glance at James.
“You told me that a year ago. I wasn’t smart enough to go then, I don’t see why I’d deserve that option now.” He muttered, sounding disturbingly more and more like the aristocratic Pureblood he was raised to be.
“It’s not about deserving, Reg.” Sirius said at the same time Remus said, “of course you do.”
“Honestly,” James interjected, “at this point, my mum would be pissed if you didn’t come live with us.”
Regulus’ face appeared to remain impassive, but Remus knew better; there were signs. His jaw tightened, there was a small movement in his left eyebrow and a subtle glossiness in his eyes.
Suddenly his gaze flit to Remus, his eyes almost begging him to understand something he hadn’t yet voiced. Remus held Regulus’ gaze until his eyes turned to something else; to you.
But it didn’t appear that you had heard any of the conversation going on around you; your eyes pointed to some unmarked point in the horizon, your mind far away.
“I can’t leave her.” Regulus whispered once he knew you wouldn’t hear.
“What’s the point of both of you suffering, Regulus? You can’t help her from Grimmauld Place.” Sirius argued. 
Regulus finally groaned, and Remus’ heart clenched knowing how close he was to frustrated tears. Remus felt just as close, feeling completely helpless in this situation. But his parents struggled enough supporting him alone. He knew that if he asked, his mum would have the two of you in a heartbeat, but the Potter’s had the space and funds to do it far more easily. 
“Y/N can come too.” James said plainly.
“Hm?” You hummed quietly, turning your attention back to the group at the sound of your name.
Regulus grimaced slightly but James, either ignorant to body language or choosing to ignore it carried on. “I was just thinking, we’re inviting Regulus to move in with us for the summer. Perhaps you could join us?”
You stared hard at James without breaking eye contact and Remus grew more and more tense the longer you stayed silent.
“It’s good that Regulus is staying with you.” You commented, sounding nearly robotic.
“You could-” Remus began, but you cut him off.
“Don’t, Remus.”
“Amour.” Regulus pleaded quietly.
“Leave it.” You ordered before standing and walking away. 
Regulus sighed and buried his face in his hands. Remus couldn’t stand it anymore and moved to sit beside him, rubbing soothing swipes up and down his spine.
“Your brother is right, love. You’ll be more help to her if you’re safe at Potter Manor. You need to be brave for the both of you right now.”
“She’s never told me either, you know?” Regulus spoke from inside his hands. “I have no idea what happens when she leaves here.”
Remus fought back the tears that threatened to infiltrate his eyes. “You’ll be more help to her from Potter Manor.” He repeated.
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You’d been avoiding the boys, that much was certain. And even if you weren’t avoiding them, it was like you weren’t even there when you were sitting right next to them. Remus hated to think that this was the note you were all leaving on, knowing you’d not see each other again until September first. 
Regulus had agreed to stay with the Potters, though he refused to discuss with anyone what was said to his parents (or, perhaps more importantly, what his parents had said in return). 
So, they stood there in Central Hall with their bags and school trunks; James and Sirius arguing over what they were going to do first when they got to the Manor (in an attempt to hopefully lighten the mood for Reggie's sake) while Remus stared at Regulus’ face without pretending that he wasn’t, as his boyfriend stood painfully rigid.
You appeared then, the strap of your duffle bag thrown over your shoulder and your school trunk trailing behind you. Remus didn’t think he’d ever seen you look so forlorn.
It was like a switch was flipped in Regulus, and he went from a soldier standing at attention to cooing over your shorter frame.
“Let me get this, amour. Did you get everything packed okay?” He asked you softly, pulling your duffle bag gently from your shoulder to throw over his own. You barely nodded in acknowledgment, eyes staring at the ground unseeingly. Remus felt sick to his stomach.
“Okay.” Regulus murmured at you quietly, giving Remus a quick shake of his head as he went to move to you. Remus had this overwhelming urge to pick you up and huddle you under his arm, not letting go until you were all the way to Wales – where your family couldn’t get to you.
But Regulus perhaps understood your mindset better than he did.  
“Can Rem take your trunk for you?” Regulus asked, mostly as a means to invite Remus into the conversation and less trying to get him to be your pack mule.
“No.” You said as firmly as you could manage in this fragile state. “I’ve got it. Thank you, though.” You said, finally looking up to make eye contact with Remus and Regulus. 
Regulus, for his part, managed to smile sadly at you. Remus was sure his discontent was written all over his face.
“Ready to get this show on the road? Look at me, sounding all muggle.” Sirius called. One would think he sounded indifferent to what was going on, but Remus (and Regulus) could see this for what it truly was: distraction.
“No.” You whispered.
“What is it, lovie?” Remus asked, turning his attention quickly back to you.
“I’m not, I-” you took a few quick breaths, face scrunching up painfully as your eyes filled with tears. “I’m not ready, I can’t. I can’t go. I’m not...”
“Okay.” Regulus said softly.
“I can’t go back, I can’t - I’m not ready.”
“That’s alright.” Sirius offered just as softly. 
You were disturbingly close to hyperventilating – surveying your surroundings like you were looking for a place to run, looking for a way out. “I can’t do it anymore, I can’t.” You cried.
“Then don’t, love.” Remus pleaded. And you broke down into sobs. 
Something inside Remus snapped and he made for you, enveloping you in a hug that was probably far too tight, but you nuzzled impossibly further into his chest anyway as if he could perhaps hold your pieces together as you fell apart.
He’d find a way to do it for you if that’s what you truly needed.
As your gasping sobs ceased and your breathing evened into only the occasional hiccup, James let out a theatrical “Phew.”
“What?” Regulus asked, voice somewhat taut from both protectiveness and frayed nerves. 
“I sort of told my mum she was coming to live with us, anyway.”
Remus could have kissed the sod right on the mouth at that moment. He opted to kiss the top of your head instead. 
“I don’t want-”
“-to be in the way. You won’t be, amour.” Regulus interrupted your train of thought, voice far softer than the one he’d used with James.
“Yeah, Regulus is far more inconveniencing than you are, dollface.” Sirius snarked with a wink, earning him a quick stinging jinx from Regulus. 
If Remus had thought that the hard part was over in Central Hall, he was very wrong.
You had settled not too badly as you all rode the wagons to the train station holding onto Remus’ hand like a vice, and Regulus appeared to be far more comfortable now that he was less worried about you. Regulus undeniably had some abandonment issues, and the thought of going to the Potter’s without you left him with the sense that he would somehow be letting you down. Remus supposed that at least before, the two of you could commiserate together knowing that whatever you were going through, so was the other.
But as the group travelled on, some of your own tension returned the closer you got to Kings Cross Station. 
“You don’t have to say anything to them, you can just leave with us.” Sirius said plainly as Remus reached to grab your bags from the overhead compartment.
“That’d be considered kidnapping.” You responded quietly.
You hooked your duffle over your shoulder and stood, looking through the compartment as if you could somehow see your family through the sheets of metal separating you and Platform 9 ¾.
“Would...would you like us to come with you? Stand by your side? How would you like to do this, love?” Remus asked, leaning back slightly so he could see your face directly. 
You seemed to ponder that for a few moments before returning his gaze. “Maybe...maybe you guys could just, stay a little behind me? Not close enough to say anything or for them to say anything to you, just...”
“Close.” Regulus finished for you. You nodded in response.
“Consider it done, dove.” Remus said and pressed a kiss to your forehead. 
James and Sirius spotted the Potter’s quickly after exiting the train and brought your bags and trunks to them so that the Potter’s elves could bring them to the Manor. You watched as your trunk disappeared with a pop; there was no going back now. 
“Y/N.” An indifferent tone called, causing you to stand up straighter, though you didn’t seem ready to turn your gaze towards it yet.
“We’re right here, amour. We’re not leaving without you.” Regulus insisted. Remus wanted to touch you, grab your hand, kiss your cheek, but he knew he’d have to wait until you felt safe.
Safe.
Soon you’d be safe.
True to their words, Regulus and Remus followed you towards your parents who stood poised like models in a Victorian Era portrait, staring down at you over their noses, though the two boys paused a good distance away as you had asked them too.
“I hate this.” Regulus murmured as you said hello to your parents. Your mother turned to leave before you asked them to wait.
“We’ll be able to take her home after this.” Remus placated, but it did nothing to soothe his own nerves either. 
“You’re doing what?” He heard your mother ask derisively. 
You repeated yourself, albeit quieter and more meekly than you had before. Remus wanted to hex her for making you feel so small.
“Absolutely not. Get your things.” Your father barked.
You raised your hand carefully, pointing towards the Potter’s to explain that they’ve already brought your things to their house.
“You insolent little witch. How dare you undermine me like this.” Your father spat and took a menacing step towards you. You stepped back quickly with a full body flinch, and that was it for Remus.
“We’re done. Let’s go.” Remus said authoritatively. “Come on, dove.” 
You needn’t be told twice, allowing Reg to steer you towards the Potter’s as Remus cast a quick muffliato around you to spare you from any trailing remarks your parents made. 
Remus and Regulus exchanged a worried glance over your head as you kept your eyes glued to the floor, letting yourself be guided blindly through the platform.
“Ready to go, dearies?” Euphemia Potter asked kindly, softly, as she beamed at the five students in front of her with Fleamont at her side. Even Remus felt like he had whiplash at the difference of atmosphere on this end of the platform; he couldn’t imagine how you or Reg were managing. 
“Hello, cariad!” Remus heard his mother call before any of you could answer Effie’s question. He turned his gaze to see his parents, Hope and Lyall Lupin, move through the crowds towards them.
“Gangs all here now!” Lyall called, and you tightened your hand currently enclosed safely in Remus’. He gave your three quick squeezes in return: a silent promise of safety. 
“This must be Regulus and Y/N!” His mum cheered, looking awfully close to embracing both of you. However, Regulus’ aristocratic upbringing appeared to save the day as he quickly stepped in front of you and stuck his hand out, bowing politely to her.
“Mrs. Lupin, it’s very nice to finally meet you.” He said, posh accent on full display.
Remus gave a pleading look to his family, knowing his mother was the kind to say “oh, I’m really more of a hugger.”
But apparently, one thing motherly love was very good at was reading the room, and his mum accepted the handshake before his dad, Effie and Monty all got one of their own. You nodded politely and exchanged a quiet ‘hello’ but opted to stay glued to Remus’ side.
He couldn’t say he minded that option entirely. 
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Euphemia Potter was no stranger to troubled children showing up at her doorstep, but she couldn’t help but admit how different this time was.
Last year, Sirius showed up battered, beaten, bloodied, and bruised, not to mention completely scared out of his mind. And underneath all of that was this horrible fear for his younger brother’s safety, as well as an overwhelming sense of guilt for leaving him behind.
Sirius never really recovered from feeling like a burden, not last summer at least. He remained entirely too polite for Effie’s tastes, full of “thank you, Mrs. Potter”’s or “that really isn’t necessary”’s right up until the day she sent them off to Hogwarts.
“Now boys.” She said, giving the two troublemakers as stern a face as one Euphemia Potter could muster. “Though I would certainly prefer no trouble at all, can we at least promise not to get quite as many detentions this year? And for the love of Merlin – no more broken bones! I like that when people ask me how my sons are, I can at least say ‘well, at least they’ve got their health!’”
Effie was certain that the pressure behind Sirius’ eyes from fighting the tears must have been excruciating, but he held out for as long as he could before he launched himself into her chest. 
“Thank you, Effie.” He finally whispered through tears.
“Please, Sirius.” She whispered as she stroked the boy’s hair. “Call me mum.”
If last year was full of guilt, grief, and fear, this summer seemed to be full of caution, hope, and love.
Where James spent last summer trying to keep Sirius in as high spirits as possible, this year he got to simply play the role of host. Where Sirius spent last summer trying to stay out of the way and convince himself and everyone around him that he was completely fine, this year he got to show his brother what real family looked like.
And though he saw a lot of Sirius in Regulus, there was so much that was so distinctly him.
Regulus’ trauma came out in impeccable table manners, speaking in a manner far more suited to a member of parliament than a teenaged boy at a casual meal, and assessing the atmosphere in the room with the efficacy of a social weather man. 
But his personality was completely contradictory. 
He made jokes and comments that he didn’t seem to realize were funny until people around him laughed, which caused him to blush but let out surprised laughter of his own. Where Sirius’ jokes were performative and always for the sake of amusing the people around him, Regulus’ humour came naturally and unbiddenly. Where Sirius showed his love and excitement as loudly as possible in order to make sure everyone around him got to share in it, Regulus dutifully handed out his love and excitement in carefully curated doses. 
She loved them both beyond measure.
And you...well, Effie could certainly see how you managed to win over not one but two of her favourite young men. Your trauma seemed to come out in the form of fading into the background. Everything you did, you did quietly. You never asked for anything, whether it be for seconds at dinner, something to drink during the day, or to go into town to shop for supplies.
But even though you were clearly struggling, Effie could see how much you cared for those boys both actively and passively. Your body language seemed to change the second either of them entered a room, their presence’s easing any discomfort you may have been feeling nearly immediately; you smiled brighter, made more eye contact, and even contributed to conversations when one of them was around. Right now they were your confidence, your safe space. Effie hoped to get the chance to see it for herself one day, but she felt unbelievably lucky to get to see it in this way too. 
You always showed up with bottles of water when the boys were outside playing quidditch, somehow knowing Regulus was the kind to completely miss any cues his body gave him of thirst and predicting his needs. And you always brought sunblock out unprompted when Remus would fall asleep with a book over his face, ensuring he wouldn’t burn in the sun. 
She loved you so much.
It had been about two weeks since summer holidays started, and Hope and Lyall Lupin were going to be leaving their mini holiday at Potter Manor in a few days when Effie felt that you had made enough progress to broach the subject. 
“Y/N, dearie. Do you have a moment?” She asked as you and the boys walked in the back door after spending some time down at the lake.
Effie noticed a flicker of concern cross your features, though you readily agreed nonetheless. Remus smiled while Regulus promptly stood at attention.
“Hope’s going to be leaving in a few days, and I was thinking perhaps we could get a shopping trip in before she does.”
At this Hope looked over with a beaming smile. “Oh! I’d so love to go shopping! The shops are not nearly as posh in Cardiff.” 
You looked between the two women uncertainly but began nodding your head. “Erm, yes, sure. What...what are we shopping for?”
“Well, I thought we could go shopping for some clothes.”
You looked absolutely horrified at this. “I have clothes! I brought everything I had from school.”
Effie smiled encouragingly at you. “Yes, and what you had packed for school was appropriate for a Scottish autumn and winter, not for a summer in London.”
Sirius, never one to leave very well alone, piped up at this. “I want to go shopping! Can I come?”
Hope chuckled and ruffled the boy’s long hair. “I think it’d be better just us ladies, hm?”
Sirius pouted at that, but Regulus took pity on his brother. “You can come with me and Fleamont, Sirius.”
Sirius stood abruptly and planted a smacking kiss to the younger boy’s cheek. “You’re officially my favourite sibling.” He declared, earning him an indignant ‘oi!’ from James. 
“Get off of me, you sod.” Regulus grumbled, leaning further into Remus’ side. 
You looked at your two boys then; Remus was smiling at you with a look so full of love and pride it nearly rivaled Effie’s, and Regulus was smiling encouragingly and so sweetly, Effie was certain her blood sugar levels spiked just at the sight.
“That...that would be very nice. Thank you, ladies.” You agreed quietly. You nodded your head in decision, mostly to encourage yourself but Effie was thankful for the effort.
It was hard to imagine a time nearly eighteen years ago that Effie and Monty were heartbroken and struggling to finally have a child of their own. If only they’d know that seventeen years later, their lovely, lovely boy would bring home four more for them to love.
She was simultaneously sad for you, Regulus, and Sirius that you had to grow up in homes that didn’t love you the way you ought to have been, but she was so beyond grateful she got the honour to love you properly, now and for the rest of her life.
As long as Euphemia Potter lived, none of you would ever spend a moment being anything but loved.
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punkshort · 3 months
Text
somewhere to run | 4. the carnival
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Pairing: sheriff!Joel x f!reader
Chapter Summary: Joel wants to take things further after you both come clean about your feelings, but some new information comes to light about your past that causes a problem.
Chapter Warnings: language, angst, PTSD type symptoms, mutual pining, boatloads of sexual tension, some sexual situations but no smut
WC: 6.5K
A/N: I'm dropping this chapter and running
Series Masterlist
You awoke the next morning wrapped in a comforting warmth, but not the warmth you were used to from your blankets. You couldn't put your finger on it, but something was different. Why did it seem so much brighter behind your eyelids? Were you in the living room? Then you felt rather than heard a low rumble, the sound reverberating under your palm and through your cheek. A distinct deep, throaty, masculine noise that you never heard before.
Finally, curiosity got the best of you and you opened one eye. Your hand was resting on top of Joel's chest, your leg was intertwined with his. You should have jumped away immediately, but you didn't. You just stared with your one eye still open, watching as your hand rose and fell rhythmically with his breath.
Then you felt his hands on you. One on your hip, the other on your arm and that did it. You sat up quickly. Too quickly. You wrenched yourself out of his grasp and leapt up from the couch, the sudden movement causing him to stir and rub his eyes. Backing up to put more space between you, you wrapped your arms around yourself protectively, staring at him as he sat up and looked around.
"Shit. We must've fell asleep waitin' for the rain to stop," he mumbled, his voice thick with sleep and you felt an unexpected jolt between your legs.
He really should have felt guilty. He was a fucking liar. He knew what he was doing last night, but you didn't. You fell asleep all on your own. Innocent and soft and sweet. But he intentionally tucked you into his side, purposefully wrapped his arms around you. Because he was greedy and desperate. Ever since that day, the attempted robbery, he ached to hold you so badly that it was painful. So he was selfish and took what he wanted, but he could see now by the look in your eye that it wasn't the right thing to do. Shit.
"I'm sorry," he finally said, standing up and ignoring the cracking in his lower back. "Nothin' happened," he added, and you blinked rapidly at that, stunned.
"Okay," you managed to whisper, eyes wide as you tried to grapple with the situation. You stared at each other for a moment, each searching the other's eyes, neither of you acknowledging the obvious shift.
Suddenly, an alarm went off on his phone. He broke eye contact to fish it out of his pocket and turned it off, checking the time.
"Gotta get ready for work," he said regrettably, wanting so badly to stay with you, to talk about what happened. He needed to know why. Why were you so distant? Why didn't you want to let him in? He was beginning to second guess the looks you've given him, the color in your cheeks when he flirts with you. Did he completely misread things? Maybe you just weren't attracted to him the same way he was to you. Fuck, he hoped that wasn't it.
"Don't overthink it," he told you curtly, trying to backpedal now that the morning wasn't going at all like he had hoped. "We just fell asleep, that's all."
"Okay," you said again, a little more clearer now.
He looked like he wanted to say more, but he glanced down at his watch and brushed past you to the door. He slipped his shoes on and swung the door open, but the. he paused, his fist tightening on the doorknob before looking back at you once more.
"See you at lunch."
With that, he closed the door behind him. You listened as his heavy footsteps trotted down the steps and then the click of the door unlocking down below. You had to hold yourself back from rushing to the window to watch him leave.
"Fuck!" you shouted out loud to yourself, all alone now in your tiny apartment. You crumpled to the ground and wrapped your arms around your knees, rocking back and forth while you tried not to cry.
You couldn't let this happen. You had to pull back. He didn't know it, but it's for the best. You were doing him a favor. But it was hard. It was so, so hard because for the first time maybe ever, you woke up in someone else's arms and you were happy. Your instinct was right. Avoiding Joel's touch for as long as possible was the right move, because now that you knew what it was like, you craved it. It's only been ten minutes and you already yearned for it again. You were weak. And the worst part was you were going to have to face him again in just a few hours, and you had no idea what you were going to do.
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The diner was busy that morning. Maria asked you to clock in right away so you could help take some tables. You were relieved to have the distraction. It helped keep your mind off the time, to stop yourself from counting down the minutes until Joel's broad frame walked through the front door.
It was late in the morning when the rush finally died down and you were helping Betty clean all of the abandoned tables in the dining room. You lost count of how many bus tubs you filled up so far as you hoisted the latest one on your hip and made your way to the dish area in back. One of the other waitresses, Gina, gave you a sideways glance as you walked by. You smiled at her but she didn't return it. In fact, it almost felt like she was mad at you. You hardly spoke to Gina since you started. Your shifts didn't usually overlap. It was ridiculous to think she would be mad at you. But something was definitely off because another older waitress, Vicky, who was never very outgoing but never really gave you a hard time, either, glared and muttered something under her breath as you passed by her in the kitchen. You frowned and turned around, watching her shake her head and continue to mutter to herself as she made her way out into the dining room.
"Betty?" you said quietly when you found her alone behind the counter.
"What's up, sweetie?" she asked as she filled the coffee machine.
"Did I do something to offend anyone?"
She paused what she was doing and considered her response before setting the coffee down and glancing around.
"What makes you ask?"
"I'm probably just being paranoid but it feels like some of the waitresses here don't really like me for some reason," you said, then chuckled. "I sound crazy, I'm sorry."
"They're just jealous, hun. Don't let it bother you, they'll get over it," she whispered, then turned back to the coffee machine.
"Jealous? Of what?" you asked, completely taken aback. So it wasn't just all in your head.
"We live in a real small town, I know you ain't used to that but what people do 'round here never stays secret for long," she said, as if that somehow answered your question.
"What does that have to do with me?"
She smiled at you and gave you a knowing look, but you were still confused.
"Oh, c'mon. You don't gotta play coy with me. Connie was openin' up the boutique this mornin' and saw Joel leave your apartment."
All of the blood drained from your face.
"What?" you whispered in disbelief.
"Nothin' to be ashamed 'bout, sweetie. All the women 'round here either want him, or they want their daughters to have him. They're just ticked he's finally off the market, is all," she explained, walking past you to greet a customer, but you grabbed her elbow, making her swivel around in surprise.
"I'm not - we aren't - that's not at all what happened!" you stuttered, your face growing hot now.
"Sure, hun," she said with a wink, then turned on her heel to greet the man at the end of the counter, leaving you slack jawed and shocked.
"Oh my god," you whispered, turning away from the counter to hide your face. How could this day get any fucking worse?
You heard someone sit down at the counter and clear their throat, and you squeezed your eyes shut. You knew that sound already. When you turned around and met Joel's eyes, he frowned, sensing immediately that something was wrong.
"C'mon, you can't still be upset about earlier," he said as you approached, and you winced.
"It's not that," you murmured, glancing around and noticing a couple of the waitresses from across the dining room watching you and whispering. You felt your stomach clench with anxiety.
"Then what's wrong?"
You looked back at him again, your eyebrows pinched with worry.
"Someone saw you leave this morning and now the whole town thinks we're sleeping together," you said as quietly as you could, your eyes still flicking around the dining room, trying your best to make your interaction with him look as innocent as possible.
"Oh," he said, sitting back in his chair as he thought about what you said. He looked around and saw a couple of the waitresses giving you nasty looks and he sighed.
"I'm so sorry," he said, shaking his head. "I'll set people straight, I promise. Just gimme the rest of the day and I'll make it right."
You immediately felt bad when you saw the stress and exhaustion that appeared on his face.
"Don't - it's fine. You have more important things to worry about," you said, picking up a clean mug and filling it with coffee for him.
"You're important to me, too, y'know," he said softly.
"Joel-" you said, setting the coffee pot down and pinching the bridge of your nose. He cut you off.
"You don't gotta say anythin'," he said, swallowing his pride.
"It's just not a good time for... this," you said, your voice pained as you pointed between the two of you quickly, then dropping your hand so no one else would see.
The way he looked at you caused your chest to squeeze and you felt the tears burning in the backs of your eyes. You could see it written all over his face, although he tried to mask it, it was clear you hurt him.
"Can't we just be friends?" you finally asked.
"Yeah," he said quietly, then looked down at the menu. "That's - yeah, 'course we can."
And you thought your day couldn't get any worse.
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Miraculously, after only a couple of weeks, the people in town seemed to move on from the rumor about you. You couldn't be sure if it was Betty or Joel or just the passage of time that did it, but the women in town stopped giving you nasty looks and you stopped hearing whispers after you walked by a table at work.
You knew it was for the best. You knew you were saving Joel from all your bullshit and that was the right thing to do, but selfishly you wished you could have him all to yourself. Was that so wrong? To just want something that was good and sweet, something that made you feel hopeful? Didn't you deserve that?
Joel stopped appearing outside of work as well. You found yourself looking for him all the time now. When you walked back home after work, when you were at the grocery store, everywhere you went you looked for him or Sarah, missing them both, but you never saw them. The town was so small, how the hell was it even possible?
At least he still came into the diner, but you got what you asked for. He stopped flirting with you and he treated you as a friend and nothing more when you waited on him. And even though you were the one who drew the line in the sand, you hated it.
It was your day off and you found yourself at the library picking up the book you had on hold for that month's book club selection. You were surprised you were still invited to the book club meeting after the rumor about you and Joel spread through town like wildfire, but you had a sneaking suspicion Hailey was the driving force behind your invite. You considered turning it down, but what would be the point in that? Then you'd really be all alone.
The library was peaceful. Sometimes when you felt especially lonely, you found a quiet corner when you stopped by to read, which is what you decided to do that day. There was something soothing about it, knowing people were nearby, but you also didn't feel forced to talk to anybody. That was, until you heard a young girl's soft, familiar voice heading in your direction. You heard her say your name, her voice hushed so as not to disturb the other patrons, and you dragged your eyes up from your book to give her a little smile.
"Sarah, hi," you said, standing up as she approached. And sure enough, Joel's towering frame trailed moments after her. Out of the corner of your eye, you saw him stiffen but then force himself forward. Inwardly, you cringed at his reaction to seeing you, but you knew you had nobody to blame but yourself.
"What're you reading?" she asked, tilting her head to the side to try to read the title of the book left hanging limply in your hand.
"Oh, it's for a book club I'm in," you said, lifting it up to show her. She nodded and scanned the cover.
"Any good?"
"I just started it but so far, it's not too bad. I wouldn't have picked it for myself, but that's the cool thing about a book club. Sometimes you read things you wouldn't normally think you'd like," you said, glancing up at Joel standing behind her, giving him a polite smile. Sarah's eyes drifted between you and her dad, and she got a playful look in her eye.
"Will we see you at the carnival tonight?" she asked you, and you dropped your gaze from Joel back to her.
"Oh, yeah I heard about that," you told her, then lowered your voice when you saw an older woman glance up at you three angrily. "No, I wasn't planning on going." You considered it, but you weren't friendly enough yet with Hailey to join in with her friends and you felt funny going alone.
"Oh, come on! It's only one weekend a year, and the entire town goes. It's so much fun, you'll love it!" she said, bouncing on her feet and ignoring the dirty looks she was getting.
"Shh, babygirl, you're bein' too loud," Joel finally spoke up behind her. The deep, low tone he used reminded you of what he sounds like when he first wakes up in the morning, and you felt a familiar stirring below your waist at the sound.
"Uh, I don't know then, maybe," you finally relented, just to hopefully quiet her down.
"Dad usually takes me to the same spot for dinner every year, it's a fried chicken stand and the line is like, a mile long but the wait is so worth it. Do you wanna join us?"
"Sarah," Joel whispered warningly.
"What?" she whispered back, annoyed.
"If I go, I'll definitely find you, how's that sound?" you told her, hoping that would be enough to end the conversation. The awkwardness was just too much at this point. It wasn't her fault, she was just a kid.
"Promise?" she begged, big brown eyes all wide. She knew exactly what she was doing.
"Promise," you assured her. She grinned then turned to Joel.
"I'm gonna go check out the DVDs," and before he could reply, she hurried away. If you didn't know any better, you would have thought she was intentionally trying to get the two of you alone.
His eyes trailed after her, his hands on his hips and his jaw ticked to the side as he struggled with what to say.
"Don't worry 'bout it, if you don't wanna go later."
"Oh... okay," you said, and he must have heard the uncertainty in your voice because he finally looked at you.
"Unless you want to, you're more than welcome to join us. Just didn't want you to feel like you had to," he explained, eyeing you up closely.
"She put up one hell of a case for it," you said with a smile.
"Yeah, she tends to do that," he said with that grin that made your knees weak, then dropped his gaze to the floor.
You were so stupid. Why did you push him away? Well, you knew why, but it still wasn't fair. It wasn't fair to either of you.
"Well, I should go," he said, still looking at the floor, racking his brain for something else to say to keep him near you, but he knew it would just cause him more pain in the long run.
You nodded and he finally looked up at you, holding your gaze for a moment before he forced himself to move. He only took a couple steps before you spoke.
"Fried chicken?"
He stopped and turned around in surprise before slowly nodding his head.
"Nothin' like it," he said. You furrowed your brow as if deep in thought.
"Maybe I'll come see what all the fuss is about," you told him. You knew you were sending him mixed signals, you knew it wasn't right, but you missed him. You missed the way he made you feel. Safe.
He let a slow smile spread across his face before he shrugged and pursed his lips.
"You won't regret it," he said with a wink that made your heart flutter.
Before you could think of anything to say, he disappeared down the row of books in search of Sarah.
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It only took you the rest of the afternoon to figure out what you were going to wear and how to do your hair. And you didn't want to admit it, but it was the happiest you felt in a long time. You knew deep down that you shouldn't feed into this little crush you had, but what was the harm in having a little fun? It didn't have to mean anything. You could spend time with Joel as just friends. But every time you overthought your outfit you needed to remind yourself he is just a friend. This was not a date. The yellow dress you picked up from a second hand store that fell right above your knee was not necessarily a 'date' dress. It could pass as a casual dress. You definitely didn't choose it because you wanted to look good for him. It was hot out, and the dress kept you cooler than a T-shirt and shorts. That's all it was.
After you parked and paid for admission, you picked up a map at the entrance and scanned the fairgrounds, trying to pinpoint where you currently were in relation to the food stands. Sarah was right: the entire town seemed to be there. The place was packed as you made your way through the crowds, occasionally stopping to check out a vendor or watch someone win a prize at a game you most definitely wouldn't be any good at. When you started to smell sugar and fried food, you knew you must be close, so you began to pay closer attention to the booths, scanning for a place that advertised fried chicken.
It was easier to spot than you thought. The line really was a mile long. And the food smelled delicious. You slowed down so you could scan the crowd, trying to find them when you heard your name from behind. You turned with a smile to see Joel and Sarah already seated at a picnic table with half eaten food in front of them and Sarah waving you down. As you approached their table, Joel slid a plate of untouched chicken towards the empty spot next to him, hiding a smile behind his food as his eyes lingered a moment too long on your dress.
"How'd you know I would show up?" you asked him with a grin as you sat down, your mouth watering as you inhaled the delicious aroma.
"Lucky guess," he said as he bit into a chicken leg. You picked up a piece and took a bite, Sarah watching you for your reaction with bated breath. You moaned and nodded to her, still chewing, but giving her a thumbs up. She was right once again.
"Told ya," she said with a grin.
"Do you guys come here every year?" you asked, covering your mouth as you spoke while you chewed. She nodded and swallowed.
"Every year since as far back as I can remember," she said. "It's like a tradition. We always come for the chicken and Dad always wins me a fish."
"A fish? Like a real fish?"
"Yep. I have a small aquarium at home. I have one fish that's been alive for like, five years, I think. Right, Dad?"
"Somethin' like that," he said with a nod, dropping his gaze to his plate.
"Wow," you replied. "That's pretty impressive for a carnival fish."
"I know. Dad says I have the magic touch. That maybe I should be a vet, or a zookeeper, or a marine biologist."
"You would be awesome at any of those things," you said with a smile. Joel's eyes flicked back and forth between you as you spoke, the warmth in his chest blooming at the way Sarah looked at you.
"Thanks. I've always loved animals, I think I would like to do something like that when I grow up. What did you want to be when you were little?"
"Me?" you asked, taken aback by the question. "You know, I barely even remember. I think for a while I wanted to be a teacher. Then I got older and... I don't know. I worked odd jobs here or there, then I didn't work for a while, and now I'm here."
"Did you work as a waitress before?" she asked. Joel stayed suspiciously quiet while you spoke, pretending to focus on his food but in reality was hanging on your every word, eager to learn more.
"A long time ago, yeah," you said after swallowing a bite of chicken.
"Do you like it at Uncle Tommy's?"
"Sarah, give her a second to eat, will ya?" Joel finally interjected, giving her a look. You laughed and waved him off.
"It's okay. Yes, I really like it at the diner. Everyone's really nice there. Your uncle is a really good boss."
"Is my dad your favorite customer?" she asked with a playful smirk, and Joel groaned into his palm next to you.
"I mean, obviously," you replied, rolling your eyes and making her giggle.
Fortunately, a marching band was making their way down the main drag of the fairgrounds, drowning out any remaining questions Sarah might have had. Grateful for the break, you ate as much as you could before pushing the rest to Joel, insisting you couldn't finish it. He gave you a fake disappointed look before he finished off the rest of your food, and you giggled as he pretended to scold you while Sarah smiled, watching the two of you quietly.
After you were done, the three of you walked the fairgrounds for a bit, heading towards the rides. Sarah spotted a group of friends from soccer and begged Joel to let her go hang out with them. He nodded, but only after he scanned the group and made sure he recognized the girls.
"She's gettin' to be that age where she ditches me for all her friends," he said as he watched her run off with a couple twenties from his wallet.
"That's gotta be tough," you said sympathetically, your eyes drifting over the different rides as you walked past.
"Not so much today," he replied, glancing at you out of the corner of his eye and watching your cheeks flush.
"Joel..." you said quietly. You needed to remind the both of you where you stood. Now that you were alone, it felt too much like a date, and you felt yourself slipping into that grey territory again.
"I know, I know. Just friends, right?" he said, as if reading your mind.
"Yeah," you said softly, looking down at the ground, unable to look him in the eye. You wanted to be so much more than just friends but you just couldn't let yourself be honest with him.
"It's okay, you know," he said, finally drawing your gaze back to him. "I can be okay with being just friends."
"Really?" you asked, but you felt your stomach twist and the little voice in your head was screaming at you for being such a fucking idiot.
"Yeah, really," he said with a chuckle. "If you don't feel the same way, it's fine. I understand."
"That's not-" you began with a shake of your head. "It's not that."
"Then what is it?" he asked instantly. You paused, not sure how much to tell him. He must have picked up on your hesitancy because he quickly retracted his question.
"Sorry. You don't gotta - just forget it."
"I really like spending time with you. I just have some stuff I need to work through on my own," you finally admitted, not wanting to elaborate further but you felt compelled to give him something.
"Y'know, friends would tell each other what kind of stuff they're strugglin' with," he said with a teasing tone, and you couldn't stop yourself from grinning.
"Is that so?" you replied, and he nodded.
"Oh yeah. All my buddies spill their guts to me whenever they're dealin' with somethin'," he said, pursing his lips to try to keep up the serious facade.
"And what kind of stuff do your friends tell you, Sheriff?" you asked, still smiling as you glanced over at him walking by your side.
"Oh, the usual. Boss is bein' too hard on 'em, car's givin' 'em trouble... girl they like won't call," he said, watching you giggle at the last one.
"What advice do you give them?" you pressed, and he finally grinned.
"Find a new job and take the car in to Connor's," he said with a shrug, as if the answer was obvious.
"And what about the last one?" you asked slowly, biting your lip and keeping your gaze fixed straight ahead. You knew you shouldn't encourage him, but you couldn't help yourself.
"That one's tougher," he said with a dramatic sigh. "But I would tell 'em not to give up. And if they have an adorable daughter, I would tell 'em to bring her around to help play matchmaker."
You giggled and he smiled, pleased every time he could make you laugh. He had to resist the urge to reach out and hold your hand. He missed talking with you like this too much to risk ruining it again, and if this was all you were willing to offer him, he would take it.
As you walked by a carnival game, Joel chuckled under his breath at the men trying and failing to impress their girlfriends by shooting poorly at the moving targets with fake guns. One of them heard his laugh and twisted around.
"You think you can do any better, Sheriff?" one balding man asked with a smirk.
"I should hope so, Kenny," Joel said, stopping and shoving his hands deep in his pockets.
"Why don't you put your money where your mouth is, then?" another man said with a grin. A couple people walking past overheard the conversation and stopped to watch.
Joel shrugged and turned back to you.
"D'you mind?"
"Not at all," you said, waving him forward. You stood back with your arms crossed and watched as Joel tossed a five dollar bill on the table and took a seat on an empty stool. He picked up the toy gun and twisted it around in his hand, testing the weight and the sight before readjusting himself, spreading his legs wide and straightening his back. Your mouth went dry as you watched him lean forward and take aim before slowly letting a breath pass through his lips, gently squeezing the trigger and hitting the moving target right in the center.
A chorus of groans and jeers from the other men drowned out the low sound you made before you took a deep breath and watched him take aim once again. Your gaze was too focused on him and the way he handled himself with such ease and confidence to notice that the crowd behind you grew bigger, some were even recording it on their phones.
When Joel repeated the same action, deftly squeezing the trigger and once again hitting his mark, you felt a pull below your waist that completely distracted you from the loud cheers.
Three more times you watched Joel take aim and hit a bullseye without even breaking a sweat. Your pulse was racing and your knees felt weak by the time he stood up with a bashful smile and took a bow for the crowd. His gaze landed on yours and his smile faltered when he saw the look in your eye, but his attention was immediately stolen by the teenager running the game.
"Here you go, man," he said, handing over a stuffed penguin half your size.
"Christ, Joel, way to make us look bad," Kenny teased good-naturedly with a playful punch to his shoulder. Joel grinned and shrugged, his cheeks dusted with the slightest bit of pink.
"Better hit the range, then, boys," he said, turning away from them and heading over towards you, his gaze darkening as he approached.
"Here you go, buddy," he said with half a smirk as he handed you the prize. You cleared your throat, trying to rid your mind of the lust driven thoughts that took over your brain for the past five minutes.
"Don't you want to give it to Sarah?" you asked, hesitantly accepting it.
"Givin' it to you," was all he said, then jutted his chin, urging you to start walking.
"Thank you," you said breathlessly, looking down at the stuffed animal as you let him lead you away.
You walked side by side, a few people stopping to pat Joel on the shoulder and glance at you curiously before you managed to melt back into the crowd.
"That was something else," you finally said, breaking the silence.
"I'm an assassin in my spare time," he joked, and you giggled, the heat rising to your cheeks almost immediately. God, you were so fucked.
You went to the restroom to try to collect yourself, reminding yourself quietly over and over in the mirror he's just a friend, he's just a friend, stop it.
When you came out, your eyes scanned around until you spotted him with a funnel cake sitting at a picnic table with your penguin sitting in the seat next to him, his eyes cast down on the phone in his hand. Fuck, even just sitting there scrolling on his phone, he was too damn good looking. You slid across from him and squeezed your thighs together under the table, looking for some relief and hoping he wouldn't notice.
"Hey," he said with a warm smile, then tucked his phone back into his pocket. "Sorry. Just checkin' in with Sarah." He reached forward, ripping off a piece of the funnel cake and popping it in his mouth, then pushed the plate towards you, encouraging you to help yourself.
"How's she doing?" you asked. You took a bite and then closed your eyes, moaning a little when the sugar hit your tongue. When he didn't respond right away, you opened your eyes and paused your chewing. His eyes raked over your face slowly, his heated stare burning you from the inside out. You swallowed your food roughly and cleared your throat. Just friends.
"She's good," he finally said softly, still giving you that look that made your heart skip a beat and your insides feel like jelly. You nodded, your head spinning, trying to think of a way to break this sudden tension when he reached out a hand, his fingers pinching your chin and his thumb swiping over your lower lip, collecting some powered sugar that gathered there. Your eyes fluttered closed for a moment, enjoying the feeling of his touch on your lips. When your eyes reopened, you held your breath as he pulled his hand back and sucked the pad of his thumb into his mouth, his plush lips wrapping enticingly around his finger, refusing to break eye contact.
You could barely breathe. You needed to say something before you lost all control, but unfortunately, he spoke first.
"You're makin' it real hard to be your friend when you make noises like that, sweetheart," he said lowly. You felt the slick between your legs as you pressed your thighs together even tighter.
"You're not exactly making it easy, either, you know," you said, matching his tone. You could see the playful glint in his eye as the corner of his mouth tugged into half a smile.
"Yeah? How's that?"
"Showing off those shooting skills in front of the whole town like it was nothing," you told him, the words tumbling out before you had a chance to think. He leaned across the picnic table and licked his bottom lip.
"You liked that?" he asked, his gaze flicking between your eyes and mouth. You leaned forward as well, getting caught in his magnetic pull.
"Mhmm," was all you managed to get out as you felt yourself falling under his spell.
"Why?"
"Hm?" you asked, looking up and dragging your eyes off his little exposed patch of chest, your mind growing hazy.
"Why did'ya like it?" he clarified. His voice sounded strained and his jaw looked tense as he continued to stare you down across the picnic table. You grinned and sat back, trying to put a little distance between you, hoping it would cause one or both of you to snap out of it, but it didn't work.
"The answer to that question isn't exactly a friendly one," you finally told him, biting your lip to hold back your giggle when you saw his pained reaction. What were you doing? This was so wrong, but you couldn't stop.
"Tell me, I wanna hear it," he whispered desperately, his eyes dark pools of lust as he waited for you to speak.
You knew if you said what you wanted to say, there would be no going back. It would go a step beyond innocent flirting and it could lead you both somewhere you knew you shouldn't go. But you were weak, after all. So you said it, anyway.
"It made me think about what else those hands could do."
It was a good thing you weren't leaning forward any longer because the look in his eye made you believe if you were within reaching distance, he would have had you bent over the picnic table already, dress hiked up around your waist for the whole town to see.
"Fuck," he rasped, finally breaking eye contact so he could rub his face roughly with his palms. Suddenly he dropped his hands back down on the table, his eyes ablaze.
"Come home with me and I'll show you," he begged. Your arousal was becoming far too evident, to the point where you worried you would leave a mark on your dress. You wanted nothing more than to go home with him, but it wouldn't be right. You weren't being honest. He deserved to know the truth before he got mixed up with all your shit.
"That's not very friend-"
"Fuck being friends, I want you," he said, practically out of breath while his hand gripped the side of the table so tightly you thought the wood would crack. "And you want me, too. So what the hell are we doin' here?"
"I-" you stammered, immediately regretting letting this get so far out of hand. You weren't ready to tell him the truth. You knew if you did, it would ruin everything.
"What am I sayin'? I'm movin' way too fast," he said, his tone softening as he misread your hesitancy. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to pressure you. We can go slow, okay?"
And because you were so weak, you nodded.
"Slow. Okay."
He leaned back and the look of relief on his face instantly filled you with guilt. If you were going to do this - if you were going to really try to do this with him - you needed to tell him the truth. Sooner rather than later.
He insisted on walking you to your car, his hand finding yours at your side while he carried the stuffed animal with his other hand. The parking lot was dark and quiet the further you got away from the fairgrounds. He was telling you something about being safe at night but all you could hear in your head was tell him! tell him!
When you got to your car, he put the penguin in the front seat and jokingly secured the seatbelt around it, making you smile nervously. You couldn't let this go any further.
But when he rounded the car to say good night and looked at you with those soft, beautiful eyes, you felt the voice in your head grow more distant.
He reached up to cup your face with both hands and looked you in the eye for just a moment before bending down and brushing his lips against yours. It was so soft and sweet and gentle and unlike anything you've ever felt that you just melted into his touch, your shaky hands coming up to his chest. He tasted like sugar and he smelled like heaven and you couldn't get enough, so you deepened the kiss, your tongue tentatively exploring his mouth as he walked you backwards a few steps so you were pushed up against your car. His hands fell from your face to your hips, squeezing them gently with his fingers and pulling you ever so slightly forward so you could feel what you were doing to him. You gasped at the hardness caged within his jeans, and he took the opportunity to venture down your jaw, his lips gently nipping while he went as you instinctually tipped your head back, the sensation far too intoxicating.
"So beautiful," he murmured into your neck. "Gonna take real good care of you one day. Gonna make you forget about every other man who's ever had you, you hear me?"
Your eyes snapped open, reality finally sinking in.
"Joel, wait," you whispered, and reluctantly he pulled back, but he kept his hands firmly on your hips.
"What's wrong?" he asked, lips parted and slightly out of breath from excitement.
"I need to tell you something."
His grip loosened on your hips but he still held them there as he began to grow concerned by the serious look on your face.
"Okay," he said slowly.
You took a shaky breath in, knowing it was now or never.
"I'm married."
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chlorinecake · 28 days
Text
The Jealous Type | P. JS
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contains rich boy jay x female reader, heavily gossip girl coded, kissing, jealousy, angst, cunnilingus (⚠︎)
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Jay has a temper, which meant you’d have to hold a movie-star smile whenever he stormed out of business meetings upon flipping a few chairs…
Jay has a high sex drive, and you still haven’t quite mastered the art of making yourself look half-decent after a quickie in his office…
Jay has a reputation, and you’ve known since day one that dating the son of a multimillionaire in a city of bright lights with even brighter personalities meant one thing for you:
That you’d have to learn to look clean while playing dirty at all times.
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Picture the backseat of a sleek Rolls Royce, tinted windows, chilled drinks, and roughly three minutes away from your final destination.
“I live a fast life, ____,” Jay began while sitting beside you, almost in a manner of warning as he relaxed into his seat.
“Great. Running sounds like fun,” you said, trying to display confidence before him.
“Every once in a while, maybe, but only if you can keep up…”
You let his words sink in, “Then I'll practice for you.”
He shook his head, “I'm afraid there's not much time left for that, love...”
“Well I've always believed in this thing called beginners luck.”
Your voice trailed off, heart prepared for another one of his defeated responses until he reached a hand in his side to grab something.
“Hold my wallet,” he said plainly, handing the leather rectangle to you.
“Jay, l—”
"Open it...” he pressed, taking your hand in his to force your reluctant fist open, “like it's yours.”
Taking heed to his words, you let out a breath, thumb and index finger tugging at the zipper to reveal a line of bills and his infamous black credit card.
“Jay, what’re you getting at here?”
“Don't look so impressed, it might come off as common,” he interrupted, watching your fingers pause at the leather opening.
You scoffed, “What's that supposed to mean?”
“That we’re in a movie, ____,” he smiled, “Just act the role to win the part.”
Aww, how wise of him….
“Great, so you won't let me run with you but playing pretend is okay?”
His smile didn’t falter at your words, only morphing into a smolder as he peered closer to you.
“Now why would I ever make you run in these sexy five inch heels?”
Your eyes fell to his hand that caressed your thigh once again, “Because sometimes, beauty is pain...”
“Very true… but it doesn't have to be...,” his voice encouraged gently, “not yet... not tonight.”
You expressed agreement with a hum before speaking again, “So can you take your fancy wallet back now?”
“Keep it,” he answered almost immediately, “Let's see if beginner's luck will help you hold onto it…”
“I'd sew this wallet to my ribcage if I had to—”
The vehicle suddenly came to a stop, flashing lights barely visible through the tinted windows as the car doors unlocked in unison.
“This is your exit,” the chauffeur clarified with a strong European accent, Jay offering the driver a thankful wave and stepping out of the car.
He walked over to your side of the car and did the same, telling you to “watch your step” as your feet met the ground.
Jay was right about one thing…
There wasn’t much time for you to practice “running” now that you were just seconds from meeting his friends and family for the first time…
The event in question was Mr. Park’s annual dinner party, held at his newly renovated restaurant in The Palace Hotel.
As soon as you stepped through the automatic sliding doors, you were met with the sound of live classical music thrumming from the center stage.
It wasn’t long before you and Jay got to socializing, helping yourselves to a few hors d’oeuvres and swigs of sparkling champagne under the glass chandelier.
His parents apparently had to leave the event early due to an unexpected emergency, so gossipy topics surrounding his family were definitely on the table.
You made sure to stay beside Jay the entire night, not only to comfort him, but to protect yourself.
That’s when a certain woman who had her eyes stuck on you two since the night began made her way by with a seductive sway in her hips.
“Nice chain, handsome,” she started without hesitation, her unfamiliar face somehow telling of her familiar intentions:
Trouble and drama.
“Thank you, Jennifer,” Jay replied, jawline clenching slightly at her prior use of a nickname.
Saying that Jay looked annoyed right now would be an understatement.
This Jennifer person was obviously his ex, though she continued speaking as if you weren’t even there.
“Isn’t that the same one you used to let me wear?,” she asked, eyes falling to his collarbone where the chain necklace sat.
“No,” he answered, a feigned smile masking the bitterness in his heart, “I got rid of that one a long time ago…”
“Aww,” she pouted, poking her acrylic nail into his shoulder, “do you have any idea how sad that makes me feel?”
“Don't poke at my boyfriend like he's some kind of toy,” you defended, your sudden boldness startling her.
Her hand stop at his the hem of his sleeve, cold green eyes meeting yours with a glare strong enough to make your skill crawl.
Yep… you officially hated her.
“Please, darling... lighten up,” she chirped, “this is just how me and Jay like to play sometimes... isn't that right, handsome? Or do you need a reminder—”
“That'd be rather unnecessary, don't you think?,” Jay snapped at her, “Maybe even a little crass...”
“Well your new girl seems tough... a little story time wouldn't hurt her…”
“Too bad I'm feeling a bit talked-out for the evening,” you spoke against her shameless demeanor, “It was nice meeting you, Jennifer. Really...”
“You too,” she mouthed with a smile, too prideful to reply loud enough for you to hear.
Turning on a heel, you hooked your elbow with Jay's, leading him outside of the venue.
“____, I can explain,” Jay started, matching your walking pace as you circled to hotel parking lot.
You shook your head, “There's no need, Jay… Your ex is a bitch, I get it.”
“____...”
“Can we just go back home already?,” you proposed, just realizing that you’d been holding your breath.
You exhaled weakly, Jay finding your shoulders as he turned you to face him, just inches from the car.
“Yes, love, we can go home, just please calm down for me, okay?”
The pitch of his voice lowered with its volume, “This was just as hard for me as it was for you…”
With that, a silence swarmed between you, just as his hand went to grip the chain around his neck.
He gave it what looked like an effortless tug before each metal link broken apart, leaving the once beautiful necklace into shiny sprinkles of gold on the pavement.
You let out another breath, “You lied, Jay... why would you keep her necklace—”
“I'm not proud of it, ____...,” he interrupted, eyes facing the ground, “but I wasn't gonna sit there and feed into her games by telling the truth...”
“Yeah… that’s because you just stood there and let her touch you instead," you retorted, walking past him and getting into the car.
You’re glad the ride home wasn’t long, you two having arrived at his penthouse somewhere around ten minutes upon leaving.
Jay's boots clicked with each step as he held your hand, guiding you up the stoned path and past the front door.
Few words were exchanged between you both once you got to the master bedroom, plopping yourself on the bed as he stood with his hands at his hips.
“What a waste of good food today... my dad would’ve been pissed to find out the guests hardly ate anything…”
Jay spoke lowly, drawing your eyes to the red velvet stain on his still crisply ironed white sleeve.
“Speaking of food, you have a bit of cake on your blazer... here, let me help you...”
He sighed, “I've got it, ____. It's really no big deal...”
“No, i-it's in an awkward spot, just let me just wipe it for y—”
“I said I've got it, alright!?”
His sharp features faltered upon realizing that he'd just raised his voice at you, and for no good reason.
“I apologize, love—”
“Whatever, Jay,” you sighed, plopping yourself on the hotel mattress, “this was all just a bad idea to begin with…”
“What do you mean by that?” He asked, arching his back so his blazer to fall off his shoulders, noting in his mind to spot-clean the stain later.
“It's just... I don't fit in your world... not a single part of it…”
Jay joined you on the bed, just in his T-shirt and slacks now as he took your face in his right hand.
“There's not a single place in my heart where you don’t fit in perfectly… y'know that?”
“I do, Jay...,” you answered quietly, meeting his dark eyes, “thank you...”
“Of course,” he smiled, placing a tender kiss to the back of your hand, “now let's get out of these fancy clothes and into something more comfortable, yeah?”
“Mhm,” you nodded, Jay standing up now and leaning before you to untie the heel straps around your ankles.
“You looked beautiful tonight, by the way,” he smiled, hands reaching beneath your evening gown to pull down the thigh-high satin stockings you wore.
“So did you.... handsome,” you smiled, propping up on your elbows to wash him undress you, and cheeky look on his face at your words.
“I learned something about you thanks to tonight,” he started, standing back up and giving you a look, “didn’t know you were the jealous type…”
You scoffed, feeling his hand tap at your thigh as a cue to turn over on your stomach now.
And so you did, hips up as he crawled onto your back in a straddling position, moving your hair out the way while admiring your beauty.
Your eyes were still internally rolling at his comment up until you felt him massaging your shoulders gently.
Somehow, you could tell he smiled at the little hums that escaped your throat once he applied a bit of pressure.
In a strange way, Jennifer’s behavior had a way of pulling both anger and anticipation out of you…
No, you didn’t like how she got all handsy with your man right in front of you, but you somewhat enjoyed the effect your reaction had on Jay…
He felt bad about what happened. Terrible, even.
And you could see it all over his pouty face that he wanted to make things up to you…
You laid there face down on the mattress beneath him, not able to focus on anything other than the feeling of his bulge pressing into your thighs.
He was turned on right now, and so were you—
“I still think I behaved myself pretty well tonight considering, though,” you huffed quietly, letting your body melt beneath his weight.
Your eyelids fluttered shut as his touch trailed from your hips to your waist, “And I’m very proud of you for that, love,” he whispered adoringly.
His hands now found the necklace around your neck, unclasping it with a simple click before reaching over to place it on the mini bedside table.
“Want me to unzip your dress for you as well while I’m here?…”
All you did was nod lazily in response, the cold metal zipper of the matching white gown you wore sending shivers down your delicate spine.
He slowly followed the trail along the curve of your back, chill air hitting your skin once he fully unzipped it past your hips.
“You know I’d never leave you for someone else, right?”
You let out a hum, feeling a bit frisky now that you were half-naked beneath him…
“Can’t be sure… who knows, there might be another piece of jewelry attached to one of your ex’s lying around here somewhere…”
He made a face at you even though you couldn’t see him from your position, “Seriously ____?”
“Very…” you answered, “…and I’m sorry...”
“It's okay,” he chuckled, letting his hands knead your hips, “But I guess that just means I’ll have to prove you wrong now…”
Your eyes flew open, brows slightly furrowed, “And prove me wrong how, exactly?”
“By giving you something I’ve never given anyone else before…”
He shimmied the evening gown past your thighs, revealing the lace lingerie set you wore underneath, it’s elastic hem snug around your plush skin…
The sight alone was enough to make him feel needy, your round ass perched up perfectly for him.
“Oh, so the whole wallet thing wasn’t a first-time trick either?” You joked, knowing he always liked it whenever you were sassy with him.
Jay smiled at your words once again, “On your back for me, princess.”
You sighed playfully before rolling over like he asked, his hands leaving the curve of your body as you got adjusted.
It didn’t take long for Jay to start teasing you back, letting a single finger circle your clothed breast but never touching your nipple.
You wanted him to grope your tits so badly, but instead his other free hand ghosted over your core, intentionally avoiding contact with your sweet spot.
“I have to ask this because I'm a gentleman, but do I have permission to make you cum more than once tonight?”
His question didn’t catch you off guard, but it definitely made you feel something in your stomach.
With dreamy eyes, you struggled to either focus on the spot between his legs or the smirk on his face…
“Only if you mean it...,” you finally uttered, giving him the cue he’d been waiting for so he could please you properly.
He let out a chuckle at your words, “Make sure you hold still for me, princess… you can pull on my hair if it gets too much...”
You watched as he nestled between your legs, looking up at you as a kitten waiting for head pats.
“But that'll hurt you, Jay...”
“I know,” he smirked, tugging your lingerie to the side and marveling at your swollen heat.
He immediately started lapping at your wetness, spitting on your clit despite how wet you already were.
“So fucking pretty,” he hummed in between making out with your sensitive cunt, foul sounds bouncing off the walls as your chest heaved with need.
Your hips subconsciously circled his face, the added movement heightening your pleasure.
You let your hands find his hair, not pulling yet but more so clawing at his scalp.
Jay groaned at your actions, looking up at you while his tongue still flicked against your clit.
The sight and sensation combined made your thighs tremble, Jay’s strong hands holding your hips down against the mattress.
“Baby, you’re supposed to stay still, remember?”
The words left his mouth in such a cooing manner, your mind going foggy because of his raspy bedroom voice.
You managed to squeak out a weak sentence, breathiness in your tone from all the action, “I-I’m trying, Jay…”
You cut yourself off when a loud whine slipped past your mouth, Jay’s hand reaching up to grope your tits while he kept sucking.
At this point, you couldn’t help but to tug at his locks, guiding his face against your folds for your own pleasure.
And he loved every bit of it… you using his face to help yourself climax.
You didn’t expect for a finger to enter you though, especially not a second one once he sped up his licking movements.
Another moan meddled from your body, eyes sealing shut as your hips rutted into his mouth, Jay’s little grunts acting as your breaking point.
The band in your stomach eventually popped, your clit throbbing with pleasure once Jay let his mouth ease your high with kitten licks and kisses.
He looked at you with such love in his eyes, “Are you convinced yet, princess?”
You couldn’t believe he was trying to talk to you in a state like this, but you still knew exactly what he was referring to with that question…
“Yes, but I think you could still do a little more,” you whispered back teasingly, caressing his face that was beaming with a subtle glow just from tasting you.
A smirk tugged at Jay’s lips once you stuck out a hand to pull him closer.
He sealed the contact with a kiss, resting a hand on your exposed thigh that still trembled slightly from your first climax.
“____,” he broke away breathlessly, clinging to your waist, “are you sure you can handle more? We can stop here…”
It’s not that he was concerned, as it was quite obvious in you haze stained eyes that you wanted more from him.
Though, given how tired you’d become after such a long day, he didn’t wanna risk overdoing it.
“But we just started kissing properly,” you protested lazily, leaving another peck to his puffy lips.
“I know, princess,” he smiled again, massaging the flesh of your thigh with his hand, “but we can always continue this another time…”
Another time when you two didn’t have to be at the airport around four in the morning the next day...
You understood him perfectly, and as his lady, you intended to respect him whenever he called the shots, even if it meant you’d have to wait.
“A better time, then,” you added, lips not being able to stay off of his as guided you back against the mattress.
In all honesty, it wasn’t easy for him to tell you no like this, especially not with the raging boner in his pants now, but he knew your rest was more important.
It didn’t take long for him to hang up all your clothes, hop in the shower with you.
He had even helped you wash your hair, massaging your scalp and washing you down before grabbing you both a clean set of pajamas to wear.
And of course, they were matching.
Finally, you took it upon yourself to prepare a set of fresh bedding linen for you two, starting a load on laundry to get back to whenever you could.
Letting out a yawn, Jay found the silk mattress first, still smelling of his potent lavender body wash by time you joined him.
Finding your waist, he pulled you against his toned chest, snuggling his member in between the natural shape of your hips, but not in a sexual way…
More so, it was a protective cuddling position, in essence…
He left a few kisses along your neck, helping you to get comfortable under the covers.
“Moving forward,” you started randomly, “let’s make sure there are no Jennifer’s on the guest lists for your private events…”
Jay let out a laugh that melted your lovesick heart all over again, “Aww, we have our first mutual enemy…”
“Can’t say she doesn’t deserve it, either…,” you returned, grazing the knuckles of the hand he held you with, “thanks for making me feel better, baby...”
He pressed another warm kiss to soft skin, “Of course, princess… Now let’s get some sleep now, hmm? We have another obligation tomorrow, you know….”
Ahhh, yes… The fast life of Jay Park.
“To tomorrow…” you agreed, feeling his warmth leave you for a second as he turned the night light off, “now hold me properly, you’re not close enough.”
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✧ Thank you to everyone who’s reading this right now!! I meant to give this story a full smut ending, but for some reason, it’s always hard for me to write intense sexual stuff for Jay ;-; … Anyways though, this was also my first time writing a oneshot for our Mr. Jongsby, so let’s hope I did him justice and y’all liked this one :’3 …
✧ My masterlist for newbies and bored readers huhu ^^
✧ 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐦 𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 ( 𝐨𝐩𝐞𝐧 💌 ) @squoxle @wonbinisbabygurl @ashgonedash @yourmomscuntis2tighy @watamotee33 @addictedtohobi @ot7sevenlvr
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tripleyeeet · 8 months
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PAINFUL VULNERABILITIES (5)
SUMMARY: When your past begins to blend into your present, you find yourself longing for Astarion's comfort.
PAIRING: Astarion & Female Reader
WORD COUNT: 3,648
WARNINGS: ANGST, hurt/comfort, body horror elements, descriptions of torture involving a knife, panic attack, sort of made up Illithid lore??? (I promise there's comfort in the end, I'm sorry!)
AUTHOR'S NOTE: Day 5 literally doesn't have a prompt because this idea got terribly out of hand so let's just ignore that and enjoy the angst, shall we?
(Also again, a lot of people's tags weren't working so next time if you haven't fixed it I will be taking you off the list because taglists are a bitch!)
CHAPTER LIST / MASTERLIST / NEXT CHAPTER
-
The nightmares start a few days later.
At first, they’re subtle. Wisps of darkness cloud your thoughts, leaving no memory behind. Silently it lingers, creeping through your skull in waves that inevitably crash against the shore, ripping you awake —leaving you breathless each time you’re left gasping for air in your dishevelled bedroll. When it happens, it always makes you jolt up to look around, trying to find the cause of your plague. The reason why you’re suddenly so wary to lay your head each night.
When you reach the Underdark they only get worse. 
What were once forgotten memories become recurring torments. Endless onslaughts of clawed hands that scratch at your flesh, pulling back skin in massive chunks that pluck excitedly at your insides. 
Thanks to the powers of the Illithid you feel every movement. Every poke and prod slips through you like a knife, cutting you down piece by piece until you’re nothing but a shell. An empty carcass of bone that’ll inevitably be harvested for a purpose far greater than yourself.
Or so she says. As you lie there, writhing in pain, blinking to shield the teeth that bear witness to your torture, you hear her whisper cool and quiet, telling you of your death. Of your fated downfall, and then of your— 
You always wake up before she finishes.
Before you can hear her utter the words you’ve heard a thousand times. Feeling the burn of your lungs, you stretch your fingers across your chest in remembrance, breathing in and out as the skin beneath your digits runs hot and you’re forced to forget the experience all over again.
When you reach camp that night, sore from the seemingly never-ending mushroom forage, you find yourself dreading the prospect of such sleep. Even through the exhaustion, the last thing you want to do is rest your head lest she arrives tonight, so you fight the urge, settling in against the edge of the fire. 
“You look tired.” 
You turn to look at Gale with half-closed eyes, offering him the softest grin you can muster before turning toward the flames. They seem brighter than usual. A decorative flash of warm-toned hues that make you blink and rub your eyes, somehow feeling even more languid. 
“Mushroom hunting take it out of you?”
You hum, making no move to look his way as you pull your knees to your chest, curling in on yourself for comfort. 
As much as you’ve grown to like Gale’s company, all you want right now is silence. A moment of peace where you can just stare into the fire and let your eyes burn from something other than the lack of sleep. Especially after spending the day alongside Lae’zel and Shadowheart as some poorly trained mediator. Just the thought of opening your mouth to speak feels like a threat to your vocal cords. The prospect of speech too much to handle, even as Gale begins to fill you in on his and Wyll’s misadventures with a nearby myconid colony.
“They’re truly such interesting creatures. Did you know…”
His voice falls on deaf ears, earning you nothing but a confused sigh once he realizes you’re not listening. Mostly because it’s not normal for you to just blatantly ignore your peers. 
“Are you alright? Need anything? Perhaps a drink or a—“
You’re standing upright before he can even finish his sentence, brushing the ass of your leathers before walking away, paying no mind to the curious wizard as he looks around the camp, catching the eye of Wyll who merely shrugs. 
It’s not like you to leave. To ignore a friend mid-conversation but your voice is gone. Lost to the void of constant intercession and a brewing anxiety that sits in your chest. As you walk towards your tent you can feel it shifting. Starting at your gut, everything twists to form a sickly sting. A stabbing pain that throbs within your abdomen, threatening to grow as you part the fabric and crawl inside, plopping into bed face first.
Despite your better judgement, you let out a low groan you’re sure at least someone hears causing you to frown, knowing that you’re better than this. Better than neglecting your health because of some silly nightmares. Better than letting the fear of your past get the better of you. Better than brooding about it. 
Turning to lie on your back, you palm the sockets of your eyes in frustration, letting your mind wander. Allowing yourself to feel everything you’ve been suppressing over the last twelve or so hours.
Aside from exhaustion, it’s mostly Astarion that surfaces. His face in the darkness looking at you as you left camp that morning, barely awake enough to give him a nod. In an instant it was as if he was there and gone, looking at you with an expression you couldn’t quite place before shifting out of view alongside an overly excited Karlach. It was the kind of look that made you question its intentions. Its knitted brows and pursed lips rising and falling through your memories between the scuffles of your two companions. 
As you walked along the edges of the Underdark’s cliff sides, you couldn’t help but wonder what exactly it represented. What emotion it was trying to convey in such a small amount of time before it disappeared completely? 
As you lie there now, once again imagining its form you feel it’s something bordering on pity. A showcase of solidarity in your obviously failing quest for sleep. 
Astarion may not say much about your struggles —unlike him, you don’t complain about the endless problems that you face on the road— but you know he’s still aware of them. He’s too perceptive not to be. 
So why hasn’t he said anything? 
A heavy breath escapes. A shaky one damaged by speculation. Ruined by the assumption that it’s because he doesn’t care. That perhaps you aren’t worth the trouble of a little bit of worry despite previous actions.
You may have killed for him —had his back long before anyone else, but have such feelings ever been reciprocated? Has your worth been proven now that you’ve slain a man in his honour? And if so, how much worth do you truly hold? Is it substantial enough to ask you how you are? Big enough to look at you with any semblance of fondness? Or is it all just for show?
There’s a part of you that hopes it is. That the moments filled with kindness are nothing more than lies told to keep your attention. If he were lying, it wouldn’t necessarily make the way you feel right now any better but it’d mean that there’s an end. A barrier to stop you from getting in too deep. An excuse you could use to explain the naivety of thinking he may care.
Because it wavers —his care. Some days it’s obvious, sometimes it’s not. You can never guess when the care will appear, only that when it’s there and eventually dissipates you’ll be left alone again, wondering why he puts the extra effort in at all. Why he reels you in only to let you go, forcing you to question his intentions as you watch with careful eyes for those moments of reassurance. Moments that you can never prepare for. Ones that gnaw at your heart with pointed teeth wrapped beneath hungry lips, starving for the truth. 
You’re not too sure you’re ready to take that leap yet. To push him for the answers you know he’ll just avoid. He’s never been quick to trust and even when he does allow you in there’s still a blockage of sorts. An obvious resistance that sits between you, forcing you to settle regardless of the fear you hold inside your chest, wondering what would happen if you tried to push. 
You assume it’d ruin you. That, more than likely, pushing too hard would only create an even deeper wedge, making the truth that much more unattainable, leaving you with less than what you started with. 
Shooting upwards, you groan again and breathe, resting your face against your open palms in irritation. 
All you want to do is sleep, knowing the only reason you’re thinking so much is because you’re avoiding it. If you think you can’t drift which means the nightmares can’t come, leaving you with two bad endpoints you know you have to choose between.
It makes you want to scream just thinking about it but instead of giving in to such desires you merely settle back down, pulling the fabric of your bedroll up to your shoulders before closing your eyes. 
You’re going to get some sleep whether or not it kills you. Whether or not you have to endure the pain of a thousand deaths all at once before you’re inevitably woken up in a stupor of suffering.
It doesn’t take long for you to drift. One minute you’re lying there, counting your breaths like sheep and the next you’re out, filtering through a darkness that feels all too familiar. At first, it’s just there, coating your skin in nothingness. Lost to the void of slumber, you’re at peace for the first time in forever but as expected eventually the shadows unfold. Part to reveal a body of pale skin wrapped around viscous veins full of the blood of many. 
It beckons you almost immediately. The flutter of that icy voice saying your name over and over until you come to call, allowing yourself to move. Letting your feet guide you to her presence, you feel the waves and how they threaten to spill over as you kneel before her, feeling her grab your throat. 
Her fingers twitch and curl but never grip as she leans forward, offering you a grin. “You’ve been avoidant.”
You don’t speak. For a moment your lips part, feeling the presence of her thumb glide across the base of your throat but you don’t dare speak.
“You know it’s coming, my dear. You can’t avoid it.”
Your tongue moves to wet your lips while you blink, trying your best to let the visions of her angular face blur into the night that surrounds you, realizing she looks just as you remember her. All papery and washed out —a mere shell of herself now that you’ve gone missing. Her features drying out with each passing day you find yourself separate. 
“Come back to me. Let me protect you.”
You swallow hard and turn your head, feeling the nails of her fingers dig into your neck prompting you to cry out. 
She doesn’t let you do much else. Quickly moving on from the one-sided conversation to grab her knife, you watch as she mumbles under her breath, turning the blade between her fingers with a grin. “In untimely death comes timely renewal, remember?” she says, letting it ghost across your bare chest, pushing the edge against it until it breaks the skin. 
You barely feel the first insertion. As the blade dips through the layers of your flesh, the only thing you feel is her breath. The pattern of air that puffs against your face as she recites those aforementioned words, taunting you as she pulls it down. 
In untimely death comes timely renewal. In untimely death comes timely renewal. In untimely death comes timely renewal…
As the knife moves lower, you repeat the words in unison like a mantra, struggling to get them out through gritted teeth as she works to cut you open. To slice your torso from the sternum down revealing countlessly re-healed bones and slimy organs that lie in waiting for her to pluck.
Hovering above you, her hands move to survey such handiwork, her fingers stroking the edges of your open skin before they inevitably dive right in, ripping you awake. 
You feel the pressure of her inside your gut before it really hits that it’s done. Shooting upward, you cough and double over in an instant, pressing your hands shakily to the ground in front of you. 
It’s the worst dream you’ve had yet. Longer than all the others, you can feel the adrenaline of it all penetrating your thoughts. Overthrowing every single anxiety you’ve ever felt as you sniff back tears, pushing yourself towards the entrance of your tent. 
Pulling it open, you look around the camp in desperation, catching the eye of Wyll who raises his brow, watching as you shake your head, slipping further into the ground.
Before you can even think he’s on you, reaching for your shoulders, asking you what’s wrong and how he can help. In response, you make no effort to reach back. To remedy your pain as you continue to shake and cry, sobbing out the cursed mantra through heavy gasps that leave him panicking. 
“Guys! Something’s wrong!”
As he calls out to the rest of the group, you quickly find yourself surrounded by familiar faces. All of them looking down to see your hysteria unfold. 
“What happened?” Dropping to her knees, Shadowheart’s the first to your side, moving her hands to cup your face before you swat her away, mouthing the words over and over and over again. 
“I don’t know!” 
“You don’t know?”
The two of them continue to bicker. As Wyll explains the way you crawled out of your tent, mumbling something about death, you force yourself to shuffle back, maneuvering your body so that you’re half sitting inside your tent again, watching it all unfold. Focusing on the confusion as Lae’zel and Karlach stand in the wings, muttering to each other words you can’t quite hear while Gale stares down at your mouth, watching the words you speak only to yourself as your eyes start to dart around. 
Surveying the rest of the camp, you wipe away your tears and try to breathe, forcing your mouth to stop its repetitions once you remember the ache inside your chest. 
Because of the Illithid, you can still feel her handiwork. Beneath your sweaty tunic, you can sense its edges burning —stinging from the aftermath as you press a hand to your sternum, making sure you’re still intact. Making sure your organs aren’t on display as you catch sight of Astarion coming up the path. 
He’s nose deep in a book when you see him, scanning the pages with interest before his eyes inevitably raise to see your nervous frame, curling into your tent. Then his interest fades. Evaporating into thin air before it’s replaced with fear. Genuine, heartbreaking fear that has him moving so quickly he fades out of view before reappearing in front of you. 
“What happened?” 
Just like Shadowheart, his hands cup your cheeks, gripping the plush as he lowers himself down, moving his forehead to yours. 
Unlike before you make no effort to push him away. Instead, all you do is frown and try to suppress the tears, clawing at his shirt with desperate pleas, begging him to stay. Begging him to tell you that everything’s going to be okay. Begging for him to lie and say he’ll protect you just like you did for him. 
Using your tadpole you beg him over and over again, letting the tears silently fall from your face, not caring that the whole party is watching.
All you need is him. In falseness or in truth, you don’t care. You just need him to ground you. To call you darling and to make you laugh. To make you feel like you’re something more than a vessel of organs one day destined for harvest. 
As your chest begins to heave, letting all the nightmares unfold all over again, you feel the tadpole behind your eye squirm in response, asking you to let him in. Without hesitation, you close your eyes and swallow hard, feeling his thoughts start to overthrow the visions of her and her knives and the mantra that sticks haphazardly across your brain matter.
I’m here, you’re safe.
For once it feels like a promise. A silent vow meant only for you as he ushers you further into the tent, saying something to your peers before closing it up. After that he readjusts the bedroll with gentle hands, always keeping a single palm against the small of your back, even when he guides you to lie against his chest. 
It’s the first time in weeks that you’ve felt safe. Resting a cheek just below his collarbone, you can feel your breath begin to return to its normal state. No longer ravaged by the panic of your dreams, it moves in and out, fanning the fabric of his shirt. 
“Was it a nightmare?”
You nod. Unsure how to explain it because, while it is a nightmare, it somehow feels so much more. 
“Of the past or?”
“Sort of.” 
He hums curiously, glancing down to see your hand slide up his chest to grip his shirt. 
“It feels like I’m answering a call.”
“A call?”
“Like there’s a person trying to reach me and when I answer I can… I can feel them.”
“Feel them?” 
You can tell he doesn’t quite understand. Not that you blame him for it. The whole concept of these nightmares still vexs even yourself. Leave you stumbling in confusion each night you find yourself awake, struggling to remember what’s real and what’s not. 
The nightmares are not as easily explainable as the actual torture you’ve endured. Especially considering that up until now there had been periods where the memories had died. Days where her face was nothing more than a splotch of white against a backdrop of black, slowly fading away. 
It doesn’t make sense why they're suddenly returning. Why your mind is forcing you to relieve these memories night after night. 
“Does your tadpole make it hard for you to dream?”
There's no hesitation when he says yes. No moment thought before his answer, making you wonder if maybe he too is experiencing these dreams. 
“I feel like it amplifies everything.”
Looking up to gauge his response, you can see the worry clouding his eyes. How his expression sort of fades into the abyss as his eyes focus on yours. 
“I dream of the past a lot. Of my life before this and… and I can feel it. Everything that ever happened I can feel all over again and it’s—“
“Painful.” His voice is broken. A crack in the mirror, shattering the often joyous image of his face as he looks away, blinking. 
Without even processing your movements you prop yourself up on your elbow, reaching over to grab his cheek and pull him back in. “I wish you didn’t understand how it felt.”
There’s a flicker of hurt that hits his face, enveloping his features before the previous sadness kicks in again and he’s reaching for your wrist, tightening around it. “Yes, well, not all of us get the luck of the draw when it comes to good lives.” 
“You should’ve,” you tell him.
He scoffs and closes his eyes, a faint smile pulling at his lips. “You’re probably the only one that thinks that.” 
You let your thumb explore his cheek. Let it move in soft circles, taking in the way it shifts beneath your touch. 
It feels strange to be this close to him even after all of the other intimate moments you’ve shared. Something about it feels softer, more honest than the rest of them, making your heart beat rapidly against your chest, threatening to burst. 
“I know it’s not my business but if you ever want to talk about it—“
He places a kiss to your hand, letting his lips linger against the pad of your thumb as he closes his eyes, reaching around to grip your waist. 
In an instant, the words drift out of your mind once you feel it; lost to a touch you didn’t realize you longed for.
Swallowing hard you lay back down to look away, feeling a bit overwhelmed at the tender image that unfolds as his arm shifts again, accommodating your movement. Making you feel that rush of comfort return as he pulls his mouth away and clears his throat. 
“I’m, uh… I’m not good at this kind of thing.” 
“Vulnerability?” you joke, earning yourself a snort. 
“I suppose that’s a word you can use.” 
“To be fair, neither am I.” 
You feel him shift to meet your gaze, looking at you with surprise. “Really now? I think breaking down in front of the whole camp just so that you can find me is quite the effort of—“
Before he can finish you clamp your hand around his mouth. “I was in shock, you bastard. I wasn’t thinking about my dignity.” 
Flexing around your palm, you feel him smile before he pulls away. “That’s good because there was absolutely nothing dignified about the way you looked at me back there. It was…” He trails off, his words catching in his throat for a moment before he clears it again. “You scared me.” 
There’s a moment of silence after that, lasting far longer for it to be deemed comfortable as you lay there, wide awake, wishing you could get him to talk to you. Hoping that maybe if you reach out with the Illithid he’ll answer your questions. 
Closing your eyes, you feel his presence in your mind already, vying for your attention in a way that has you both moving in closer, tightening your hold. 
Show me the dream. 
It isn’t a question or a request but a simple command that has you obeying —letting him enter your thoughts. Letting him stand along the sidelines as she guides you to the ground and cuts you open all over again. Letting him listen to the recital of words that are spoken behind two frozen expressions as Astarion pulls you tighter against him, placing his mouth to your forehead to stop himself from crying. 
-
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charliemwrites · 2 months
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Government Asset Soap! This is half of the last part (the smut got too long and I wanted to post this dammit).
So consider this part 4.5? idk it's late.
Usual CW for this series with dubcon, mean Soap, post-trauma coping.
It’s probably a fire hazard, the candles. They’re sprinkled across your little cabin like fireflies, feeble but steady heartbeats of a home you’re failing to build. Too many of them, likely. Two, sometimes three, per room. Tiny tealights, smokeless soy, scented pine. It would be easier, safer, to just turn on the lamps you foolishly invested in.
You can’t bear anything brighter than golden halogen anymore, though. The glare drags you back to a tiny cell bisected by cruel metal, holding back an even crueler fate. No, you’d much rather wade through pools of shadow and firelight, fire code be damned.
It’s a small cabin, but you’ve already cluttered it up with furniture and rugs, a theme for each room. Yellow and blue for the kitchen. Purple and cream for the den. Green and brown for your bedroom. Nooks to hide in, spaces to squeeze into, big shapes to huddle behind. You’ll never be caught out in a cold, barren room ever again.
Your days are long regardless of the time of year. Get groceries in town every day, making a point to be friendly and seen so that someone might notice if you suddenly stop coming. Clean incessantly, so many surfaces to dust. Pick hobbies like daisies. Knitting and crocheting, different paint styles, felting. You’re contemplating carpentry, would like to build shelves for all the books stacked up in the den. Keep a dream journal by your bed that you neglect for weeks at a time.
You draw out the nights until you can count the hours until dawn on one hand. Stay up baking, making homemade ink, learning new ways to style your hair, anything, anything, anything—
It’s not the sleeping – or at least that’s not the worst of it. It’s the waking.
Laswell suggested a cat.
You told her to stop suggesting pussy to unstable people.
But it’s still not a bad idea. Another living thing to keep you accountable; the plants are pretty and time-consuming, but not good company.
You talk yourself out of it every time, knowing the worst-case scenario. It’s not catastrophizing if it actually happens, and you can feel an invisible time weighing on your shoulders like another gravity. Tick, tick, tick. Heavier, heavier, heavier. It’s hard to breathe beneath the wait.
The military doesn’t do apologies. It does platitudes at best. Well wishes and good intentions are painted in brushstrokes of blood. Victory flags are planted on bodies, living or otherwise. Laswell apologized. She swore that if there had been another way – any other way…
She didn’t promise to leave you alone. Didn’t assure you that you’d never see her or her goons again.
If you thought it would do any good, you’d tip one of the candles over and set it all aflame. Rebirth through fire. But you never did figure yourself for a phoenix. And besides, a phoenix is still itself, even when the ash falls away.
So, you spool out your time like picking at tapestry threads, one thin string at time.
Tonight, it’s bread. Cinnamon chocolate babka, to be specific. You were craving something sweet. Are debating the merits of some sort of cream cheese icing while you shower off the long, ever-busy day.
Have decided on an optimistic why not as you slip out to begin your overly complicated self-care routine. Moisturizers, hair oils, lotion. An unexpected benefit of overloading yourself, you suppose. Even when you first got out of the military, you didn’t take such good care of yourself. You have a jogging route now. You’re handling your trauma every possible way except therapy. (And sleeping.) Better than nothing, you figure.
The candles have gone out in your bedroom. You click your tongue in annoyance, trying to remember where you left the matches this time. Bedside table?
You pad across the soft carpet, using the edge of the bed as a guide in the pitch black. The only other problem with candles is that their humble light doesn’t reach very far. But you know this house and keep the floors tidy enough that you’re confident you won’t trip.
Make it to the nightstand without incident and pat around. Knock the side of your hand into the little carton and only just catch it before it hits the deck. Let out a little huff and start to fumble it open.
“Nice catch, bonnie.”
You gasp, but your voice doesn’t get any farther than the back of your tongue. The box slips from your numb fingers, matchsticks scattering across the floor. He tsks.
“Shame that. We’ll get ‘em later.”
You can’t move. Can barely breathe. You’re just frozen, heart thundering with a sudden storm of fear and confusion. Hands still aloft in front of you, spine rigid, knees locked.
You feel more than hear movement behind you, and then the warmth of his body seeping into your naked skin. Not quite touching. Not yet.
“Missed you, little bird,” he rasps in your ear.
You always thought that in a moment like this you would scream. Kick and elbow and fight, damn your certain loss. But when it comes down to it, survival drowns out all those stupid, haughty ideas about pride and dignity. So you don’t curse and shout like you always fancied you would.
You whisper, “Soap.”
He hums but it sounds like a growl in your panicked state. “Missed me too, aye? You’re already naked fer me.”
His hands are searing when they settle on your waist like they belong there. He pulls you back against him; in the dark he’s bigger, broader than you remember. At least, you think, he’s fully clothed for now.
“What are you… how are you here?” you ask.
He barks a laugh, mean and rough. “Was only a matter of time after that shite they pulled.”
You squeeze your eyes shut and see it recreated in the phosphenes behind your lids.
Soap buried balls deep inside of you, murmuring a constant stream of filth as he got harder and harder inside you. Filling you up as you twitched around him, oversensitive and teary, afraid of what would come next.
Then the lights flashed, flicked red. An alarm sounded, Laswell’s voice ordering Soap away from you. But he just snarled and hunched over you, hips snapping to bury himself right back inside while you cried out.
The locked door swung in, armed guards swarming in. Yanked Soap off you while you scrambled to cover yourself. Someone grabbing your arm none too gently to pull you from the room. Soap wild-eyed and snarling like something possessed, until he was overtaken by struggling guards and you were trembling naked in that damned hallway.
“Was mad at you, at first, cannae lie,” he says, almost conversational. Your eyes snap open, though you know it’ll do you no good. “But I’ve had time to think on it. Wasnae yer fault, was it? Saw them drag you out.”
An awful relief floods you. Fuck dignity, fuck honesty. This is Soap right behind you, completely unrestrained and unsupervised.
“Yeah,” you answer, voice small. “I didn’t know they would do that. What… um. What happened to you?”
He presses his face into your damp hair, pressing closer, snaking his arms to squeeze you against him.
“Sent me off on some shite mission,” he explains, “probably hoped I’d die out there. You smell so good, lass.”
You shiver as his breath ghosts over the sensitive skin of your neck. Hot, humid.
“And… and then what?” you insist, trying to stall.
You’re not sure what you’re stalling for. There will be no miraculous saves here – not that you really got any last time. It’s not like there’s any real plan to be made here, either. None that you’d be confident enough to risk his wrath on.
“Disappeared. Took care of business. Came to get my pretty little bird.”
A rough hand trails over the curve of your hip, brush the neat curls of your mound. You suck in a breath, hands twitching with the urge to stop him but not sure of putting up resistance when you’re still unsure of his mental state.
“And what about you, hm?” he rumbles. “Been a good girl while I’ve been away?”
His fingers dart down towards your entrance, not nearly prepared for anything. Least of all his thick digits.
“Y-yes!” you yelp, grabbing at his wrist. Relief makes you dizzy when you manage to stop him. “I-I’ve been good. Which means I’m not… I can’t just take you. I need… I need prep.”
He huffs, nips at the tender spot beneath your ear. The thrill that shoots through your stomach is terrifying.
“That’s what these are for, bonnie.”
And to your horror, he starts to push past your resistance like your staying hands aren’t there at all.
“John!”
He freezes. You shudder air into your burning lungs, feeling dizzy on panic.
You can get through this without pain, just think.
“I haven’t even got to see you,” you stutter, voice shaky. Can’t quite inject the disappointment you’re trying for, but hopefully it’ll work. “And I bet you’re all dirty from travel.”
He grumbles. “So what?”
You scramble to think of a satisfactory response. “S-so let’s get reacquainted in the shower, yeah? That way I can see your handsome face, at least.”
He chuckles, grazes his teeth “playfully” across your cheek. “Bossy thing.”
“You like it.”
And to your shock, he agrees with an amused huff. Hauls you up in his arms and walks you back to the still muggy bathroom. You’re set on your feet and spun around, chin jerked up to receive a savage kiss. All tongue and teeth, no finesse. He’s just licking into your mouth, hungry and animalistic, spit dribbling down your chin.
When he finally pulls away, you blink spots from your vision. Finally focus on his smug features and make a soft, horrified noise when you register the splatter of crimson across them.
“Och, that? My little bird had watchers.”
Of course you did. The horror ebbs a bit. Resentment has made you indiscriminately bitter.
“Oh,” you say, “th-thank you. Definitely glad we’re showering first, then.”
“Squeamish?”
You’d like to know when the world turned upside down and John fucking “Soap” MacTavish began teasing you about the blood on his face.
“A bit,” you admit.
“Poor dear,” he coos. “Hard to believe we were made for each other sometimes, aye? Complementary, we are.”
Is that what he thinks? Christ.
You turn to start the shower again, spine prickling with the weight of his eyes on your back. The water rushes down and then he’s crowding you against the cold wall beneath the (thankfully) warm spray.
“Y-you’re still dressed!” you protest between sharp nips to your collarbone.
“Fix it, then,” he snarls.
You claw his shirt up his back, get momentarily distracted by the impressive display of muscle hidden beneath. Draw your palms over his chest and feel him shudder.
“Fuckin’ heavenly, love,” he purrs. “Missed this.”
A vague memory comes back to you, him gripping you close because he felt you naked against him for the first time. Him admitting he hasn’t had affectionate touch in a while.
This… this you could work with.
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ronearoundblindly · 3 months
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A Casual Kiss
Bucky Barnes x reader, one of my Valentine's Fics of 2024
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It's just adorable fluff, really. No warnings. Divider by @cafekitsune WC 547
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A lot has happened to Sergeant James Buchanan Barnes over his long life. He used to be a ladies’ man and a traditional sort of soldier. He used to have all his natural limbs. He used to take maybe a touch too much pride in his appearance. A lot has also changed.
Wars change people. Injuries change people. People simply change over time.
And Bucky Barnes has been around a long, long time.
You knew all this from the beginning, of course, because his whole tragic history had already been slashed across newspapers and television by the time you started work in the same building.
He started out cold, then he became reserved, and then he was cautious. You didn’t even know he knew your name until the day he—very formally and awkwardly—asked you out, and the relationship developed…predictably.
That’s the best word for it. Predictable.
There were a few dates before he hugged you goodnight. The next time, he kissed your cheek. The next, you got a chaste peck on the lips. So on and so forth.
Measured increments of intimacy.
It was predictable and still wonderful.
Bucky isn’t good with ‘easy-breezy’ anything, you see. He’s intense and considerate. He plans ahead and for all contingencies, and so you’re taken aback by this random passing in of your department leaving the conference room and Buck’s team coming in.
There’s plenty of people around. Normally, that means a kind smile, perhaps being asked to step aside for a moment so he can say hello and check on your day, maybe check on your plans for dinner, but today? Today is different.
He’s smiling alright, smiling wider and brighter than you’ve ever seen him on the job. His shoulders are relaxed and loose. He’s strutting right for you, and suddenly, like a choreographed dance move, he twists, kissed your forehead, and twists again, still walking but backwards now.
Bucky winks at you as his metal hand finishes a soft graze down your arm.
Butterflies erupt in your stomach.
“Love you, doll,” he whispers though at least half the room can probably hear.
It’s not as if no one knows at work. You’ve dated for months, and for that whole stretch, Bucky’s been a perfect gentleman, just very…not casual. This is new.
So why not make it even stranger?
Your boyfriend snaps his flesh fingers like he just remembered something, nearly skipping the couple of feet to your side.
“Hey, so, I know we were doing movie night, but Sam’s taking some folks out to the corner bar. His treat.”
You can’t help but snort.
“Oh? And let me guess. You—who is unable to get drunk—would like to make him pay for the multiple bottles of top-shelf liquor you can consume.”
Bucky waggles an eyebrow, and you’re stunned.
“Know me so well,” he coos, leaning in to plant one more solid smooch on your lips.
Your lipstick stains his mouth until Bucky’s tongue wipes it away.
“I’ll pick you up at your office.”
You’ve hardly controlled the flutter in your gut but now have a grin fighting to break free. All you can do is nod, heading for the exit, thinking:
People always change over time…and sometimes, change is for the better.
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A/N: Yeah, so, absolutely no one requested this and I don't care because HE DESERVES THE KISSES.
James Mace and a kiss without motive ⬅️ ➡️ Jake Jensen and a kiss to distract
[Main Masterlist; Light Masterlist; Ko-Fi]
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apollos-calliope · 2 months
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luke castellan x poseidon!reader
cw: angst, mental health, panic attacks
when breaths taken seemed a little too shallow and thoughts raced around your one-track mind, everything seemed animated. the sun was far too bright, the sound far too loud. the intense summer heat radiated down in cartoon rays, hitting your skin and exploding into little pricks of pain. even the deep cuts in your camp shirt and the noise cancelling headphones fitted on to your head weren’t doing anything to provide relief from the sensory overload. your face was buried into your knees as you pressed your back to the wall of the arena. you could feel everything a hundred times more intensely than normal.
normally, luke would have been here to guide you to the poseidon cabin, where the deep blues would stop your vision from buzzing and the sounds of the ocean quieted the cacophony of camp half-blood. luke would hold you until the shaking stopped and soft snoring replaced it. normally, you could be assured that the both of you would return to an empty cabin, being poseidon’s only demigod child residing there.
so much had changed in the past few days. suddenly the dark navy of poseidon’s cabin looked a little brighter, the space inside a little less empty. a boy had shown up to camp, with bright blue eyes and curly blonde hair. you felt a pang in your heart the first time he waved at you to say hello. something seemed off, but you didn’t know how to explain it. when he was claimed by your dad about three times as fast as he claimed you, everything began to make sense. around percy jackson, your senses seemed to calm to a comforting thrum. the luxury of having a sibling was new to both of you, and he easily turned into your closest confidant and a younger brother you felt like you’d spent your whole life with. instead of returning to an empty cabin with luke, you’d return to a concerned percy. a teary-eyed twelve year old boy who recounted his mother’s stories to you until the world’s saturation turned to normal and you no longer felt like you were dying.
in the meantime, your best friend luke had stopped speaking to you.
he got along with percy like they were brothers, helping him look for his strengths and identify his weaknesses. they went all around camp that day. percy waved to you as they passed the lake. you stopped drawing patterns in the water with your hand to lift it in the air, and luke made eye contact and flinched. he nudged percy along and averted his soft brown eyes, a hint of guilt lingering behind them. your hand softly drifted back into the water.
you didn’t understand what had happened. you had traded one for the other, seemingly. that was a sacrifice you weren’t willing to make.
luke avoided you like the plague for days after percy got to camp. wherever you were, he wasn’t. even the training arena was void of him when you were there, despite his track record of training constantly. you had asked around, but no one knew what was going on with your best friend. connor attributed it to his “man-struation” while travis countered with some joke about a boner. even charles and chris had no idea what his issue was.
you had taken up spending all of your newfound free time at the beach, where the ocean could wash away the fights you’d had with luke and leave an empty slate in their absence. maybe it was best to forget about him after all. it wasn’t easy to push away the visions of his gentle eyes and tanned skin; his warm smile as he twirled you around after winning another game of capture the flag; his sweat glistened cheeks emphasizing the beautiful scar etched into his skin. you’d traced that scar hundreds of times when you’d cup his cheek as he sobbed about his father. then there was his toned arms: you’d yank at one and drag him away from his friends to whatever you two had planned that afternoon. they’d whoop and holler, and you’d run your hands up and down the muscles mindlessly.
yeah, maybe it was best to forget about him.
you never noticed the shallow breaths luke took, his face burning like apollo’s chariot had flown straight into it. he was just out of reach for you, your perfect best friend who you were cursed into loving. the fact that you two were the best of friends was proof enough that he could never see you the way you saw him.
were the best of friends. past tense. now you’d sit at the poseidon table in the mess hall and watch him rise from table eleven and excuse himself promptly. he didn’t even glance your way anymore.
after percy left for his quest it was much easier to isolate than you anticipated. chiron was too busy with the other campers to even notice your absence, although clarisse stopped by to entertain you now and again. without luke, camp became a shell of what it used to be. you envied the other campers that got to see him shine still. you sat in a pile of blankets in the dark, empty cabin that once used to be filled with love and good memories.
where did you go wrong?
luke saw you fall apart at the seams the moment he stopped speaking to you. the sky stayed a permanent dull grey, the grass looked more yellow, and even the air felt stale without you around. you breathed life into the world for him. the saddest part was the still waters everywhere. they fell silent in solidarity, like they wanted him to hear the soft sobs coming through your cabin door as he passed. he knew it was better this way though. you’d understand after you lost your brother. he wouldn’t be able to look you in the eyes knowing it was his fault, anyway.
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fieldofdaisiies · 23 days
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Scars Like Mine pt. 2
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paring: Azriel x Reader | type: fluff | words: 1,6k | warnings: none. playlist: hurts | scars to your beautiful | beauty marks | stronger | fly with me finally part 2 is here, I am sorry for the long wait; part 1 (how Azriel meets Elia and her mother)
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“Are we going flying now?” Elia bounces up and down on her chair, then gulps down the rest of her hot cocoa in one big sip. She taps her fingers onto the wooden table, her gaze ping-ponging between Azriel and you.
You reach for your daughter’s hand, trying to calm her a little while throwing Azriel an apologetic look, but he only smiles politely. “Azriel has just arrived here, my love, give him a little break and let him enjoy breakfast with us.”
It has become a natural thing for the three of you. Azriel has come here often in the past months, at least two times a week, to have breakfast with you and then go flying with Elia. Maybe on one or the other occasion, unbeknownst to your daughter, Azriel already arrived the evening before and spent the night with you. Yes, yes, it is true. The two of you have started dating a while ago and you couldn’t be happier. 
Elia knows that you are dating, knows that her mummy is suddenly a lot happier, and her days are brighter. Elia loves this, loves to see her mother smile and laugh so much, and loves to have Azriel here to fly with her. He is great at flying and can teach her so many things. She has already learned how to do a turn, a twist and fly a spiral. 
It gives you small heart attacks whenever you see those stunts, but you know that with Azriel, and him always being close to her, she is safe and nothing can happen to her, or will ever happen to her. 
“It is fine,” Azriel says, “I’m almost done anyway.” He takes a sip from his water, before gulping down the whole glass and rising from his chair. Your gaze follows him, the outline of his strong, solid body, and you pull your lower lip between your lips when memories of the other night fill your mind. It is insane and should be forbidden what his wicked mouth and his hands can do, and you wonder how you got so lucky to have met him. 
Not only for yourself. He is not only a god in the sheets. Azriel is everything you have ever hoped for in a male. Kind, caring, charming, wonderful, smart, and he loves your daughter and treats her with so much kindness and fatherly-love (even though she is not his daughter) your heart wants to cry. You have cried on many occasions already, not believing that you actually got so lucky to finally have this amazing male in your life. 
Azriel reaches out his hand when Elia jumps up from her chair and starts punching the air. He brushes his scarred hand over your head and smiles when he meets your gaze. “We’ll be careful, I promise.”
“I know,” you smile up at him and place your hand atop his, thumb stroking his marred skin. “I trust you.” You rise as well, and kiss him on his cheek and then pull your daughter into your arms, squeezing her tightly while plastering her face with kisses. “I also trust you, no crazy stunts or twists or spins,” you tell her, knowing it is useless anyway. 
In the corner of your eye you catch Azriel grinning at her, knowing that they plan on doing stunts and crazy twists and turns, but if it brings her joy, you would never forbid it. She will be fine you, you know it. 
⊹ ࣪ ˖ ⊹ ࣪ ˖ ⊹ ࣪ ˖
“I am flying!” Elia blazes ahead of Azriel, throws him a big grin over her shoulder. She is now onto her third spin in a row, Azriel always close to her in order to catch her if she threatens to fall. She has turned into a great flyer, but Azriel doesn’t fully trust her abilities yet. She is still very young, the muscles in her wings not yet so strong. 
She is so fast, and her laughter so radiant it fills Azriel with pure bliss. Seeing her happy, it is so good and knowing how happy her happiness makes you, is all Azriel needs in life. The two of you have made his life so much better – in you he has found a family, one that resembles the one his brothers have and he couldn’t be any happier. 
“Look!” Elia hollers and Azriel grins brightly. 
“So amazing, Elia!” he shouts to her over the rising wind, showing her thumbs up. She makes another spin and now even Azriel’s stomach dips. She catches herself and blazes away once again. She twirls around Azriel when she changes direction. And then…
Out of the blue, words leave her mouth that nearly make Azriel lose balance, that nearly throw him off his wings and make him slam to the ground.
“Look, dad, I am flying like a bird. I am weightless and free” She makes another twirl, one big swirl around Azriel, grinning from one ear to the other, fully oblivious to what she has just said.
For a few months, he has flown with Elia, many times, more than he can count on both hands, but never has she called him anything but Azriel before. It is hard to catch himself now. Although he never admitted it, he has always hoped for a little family of his own and children. And now…now this might truly become reality. 
The rest of the flying session passes too quickly, Azriel is unfocused, distracted but always careful so nothing happens to your daughter, but his thoughts stray, and he finds himself imagining a future where the three of you are truly a family – you and him married, and Elia calling him dad on a daily basis. It is a beautiful dream, so beautiful tears start to burn behind his eyes when he catches Elia in his arms and helps her lower herself to the ground. 
She inhales deeply, then tucks in her wings. “I need to tell mummy about flying today, come come!” She tugs at Azriel’s hand, already setting out for your hut, dragging him along with her. 
⊹ ࣪ ˖ ⊹ ࣪ ˖ ⊹ ࣪ ˖
You brush the wet sponge over his back, and softly move on to his left wing, careful not to touch the sensitive parts. Leaning in, you kiss the nape of his neck, then carry on to help him wash his back. Elia is already fast asleep, after telling you everything about the flying session while you ate dinner. It was wonderful to listen to her, and you couldn’t stop smiling when she recounted all the swirls and twirls she made and how much joy flying brings her. 
The only thing that confused you, how absentminded Azriel seemed during dinner. He hardly added any comments, normally he loved talking about flying with Elia, this time he kept calm, was mostly distracted and you really hope he will open up what has been going on within him. 
It is almost as if he can read your mind, because only a moment after you finish your thought, he says, in a voice full of emotion, “Elia called me dad today.”
You stop. Everything stops. Your hand folds over your mouth, to keep the gasp that threatens to escape contained. Tears start to build up in your eyes and then the sponge drops into the water. “Are you–is it–I hope–”
“I didn’t mind,” Azriel answers quickly, having noticed your sudden tension. He turns in the tub, tucking in his wings so he can look up at you. “Actually…” He inhales a deep breath and his eyes close. “I actually appreciated it a lot, and didn’t mind at all. I liked it,” he sheepishly admits. “I have always wanted children, and being with you and having Elia in my life as well has brought me more joy than anything else in my life before. I couldn’t be happier and her calling me dad…it felt so right.”
“It is alright for you?” you ask, carefully.
“Of course!” Azriel turns even more in the tub and places his hand on your knee. “Is it alright for you? She has a father after all and he–”
“He was an asshole and I never ever want her to have anything to do with him. You are the best thing that could happen to her, and I love that she has probably realised that as well. She has never asked for her father, she knows that he has caused us this pain, that her body is marred from fire because of his doings.” 
You swallow around the lump in your throat and tears roll down your cheeks. “I couldn’t have hoped for a better father substitute than you. You are everything I could have ever asked for and she loves you.”
“And I love you, and our little…”
“Family,” you finish for him, cradling his face in your hands and kissing his lips softly.
⊹ ࣪ ˖ ⊹ ࣪ ˖ ⊹ ࣪ ˖
At first you hear a door open. Azriel is deep asleep, he doesn’t hear it and also not the soft padding of feet over the ground. The bed dips on your side, and you reach out your arms, lifting your daughter into the bed. “Can I sleep here tonight?” 
You kiss her brow. “Of course, my love.”
You help her crawl over your, so she can get comfortable between you and Azriel, snuggling up to your side, her face buried in the crook of your neck. Azriel stirs awake, but not completely, he mumbles a few incomprehensible words and then simply curls his arm around the both of you, inhaling deeply before falling right back asleep. 
You have to smile to yourself, your heart so full of love and bliss, it nearly bursts out of your chest. And the smile stays on your lips when you fall asleep, the two most important people close to you, in your arms and you know that everything is alright and a bright future is ahead of you. 
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tags (crossed-out I couldn't tag) : @juulle987 @marimorena06 @danikasthings @younxii@nightcourtwritings @mrofontaine @lunalilyf @whor-3-crux @tired-all-the-time @anni-was-here @ummmmmwat @azbracadabra @j-pendragonx @hollyismentallyillhelp @famousbasementpainter @bsenpai @lena-davina @red-highlady @thesugatoyourtae @azrielsbabyg @aroseinvelaris @moony-thoughts @wrensical003 @cherryjain17 @moonfawnx @crushedcloudsx @devilsfoodcake22  @valeridarkness @azrielscertifiedslut @mulansaucey @cynicalpotato95 @hanasakr @high-bi-andreadytocry @eerievixen @feyretopia @moonlightazriel @randomness-it-is @brekkershadowsinger @eliieee23 @girasoli-e-sorrisi @illyrianvalkyriecarynthian  @kennedy-brooke @highladyofillyria @theworthlessqueen @marina468 @topaz125 @illyrian-dreamer @azriels-mate123 @eos-princess @courtofjurdan @a-frog-with-a-laptop @insufferablebookaddict @azriels-mate2 @callmeblaire @lilah-asteria
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chronicowboy · 1 year
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Buck is stood staring at his couch with a wrinkled nose when a frantic knocking rips him from his thoughts. Frowning, he skids over to the door on socked feet and yanks it open to reveal a harried Eddie and sheepish Christopher.
"Tell me you aren't busy," Eddie pleads, already pushing into the loft to set down two dangerously full grocery bags on the kitchen island.
The loft suddenly seems a lot brighter, feels a lot warmer.
"I'm not busy," Buck replies as he shoots a questioning look at Christopher who only bites his lip and looks away.
"Oh, thank God." Eddie grabs him by the shoulders with a grateful smile before taking a deep breath. "I am. Busy. Like incredibly busy."
"Okay..." Buck narrows his eyes at him. "So, I'm hanging out with my favourite Diaz then?"
"Hold the thought on that favourite bit," Eddie huffs, dropping his hands. Buck's shoulders turn cold at the loss, he shrugs the absence off. Eddie turns to Christopher with his arms folded over his chest and an arched eyebrow. "Want to tell Buck what you decided to tell me at four pm this afternoon?"
"Fine," Chris sighs, looking up at Buck guiltily. "I need to bake cookies for my whole class."
"Sure, we can do that." Buck frowns, sharing a look with a still frantic Eddie. "When do you need them for?"
Christopher averts his eyes. Realisation dawns on Buck, and he shares a knowingly unimpressed look with Eddie.
"Tomorrow," he mumbles.
"Chris," Buck groans.
"I know, okay?" Chris groans right back. "I forgot. I'm sorry. Will you help me? Please?" He breaks out his patented puppy eyes, and Buck has to try hard not to laugh at the notion he wasn't going to help Chris all along.
Buck steals a look at an apologetic Eddie, shakes his head in a way he hopes conveys I've got your back.
"Of course I will, Chris, you know that." His eyes snap to Christopher when Eddie's face melts into that dangerously fond expression. He's been seeing a lot more of it ever since he woke up from his coma, and it makes him feel a little like a lightning bolt trapped in a human body. He doesn't know what to make of it.
"You are a lifesaver," Eddie tells him seriously, pulling him into a quick hug. "I've gotta get over to Pepa's, but I'll be back around dinner time, okay?"
"Oh, I see," Buck tuts. "You just want to reap the benefits of all our hard work."
"Obviously." Eddie pulls one of his patented frog faces. "I wasn't trying to hide that."
"Lazy good-for-nothing," Buck says, except it comes out sounding much more like you're everything.
"Oh, I'm sorry. Who here was asleep for a wholeass week?" Eddie retorts.
"Ass," Chris snickers.
"Don't," Buck and Eddie scold in unison, sharing a bashful smile. Chris just rolls his eyes.
Buck tries not to preen at how natural all of this is, thinks of Bobby's words in the engine just before lightning struck.
Life's too short to take those relationships for granted.
Buck has seen his world without the Diazes in it, he'll never take them for granted again.
"I don't think a coma is technically considered sleep," Buck argues, just happy that Eddie isn't flinching away from the reminder of the accident like he used to.
"Well, you weren't snoring," Eddie concedes.
"I don't snore!"
"Buck, the only reason I felt okay leaving you sleeping on the couch to make Christopher's lunch was because I could hear you breathing all the way from the kitchen." Buck tries not to think about a worried Eddie hovering over him, fingers itching to reach out and find a pulse, lingering in the doorway to the kitchen because he didn't want to leave Buck alone. "You snore."
"You snore," Chris agrees.
"Betrayal!" Buck gasps. "We're making oatmeal raisin cookies."
"Nooooooo!" Chris cries. "Buck, please!"
"Do I snore?" Buck demands.
"Nope." Chris grins.
"Chocolate chip it is."
"Double chocolate chip?" he tries, eyes wide and sparkling. Buck loves him desperately.
"Nice try, kid." Eddie drops a hand onto Christopher's head. "You get double chocolate chip when you tell us more than one day in advance."
Something warm and content settles in Buck's gut at the ease of Eddie's us.
"Buck?" Chris pouts up at him.
"Nah, not gonna work on me." Buck shakes his head, folds his arms over his chest. Eddie sends him a smile, the small and private one that tucks itself into Eddie's rosy cheeks, the one that Buck's pretty sure he'd return from the dead just to see again.
"Okay, well, you two have got it under control." Eddie ducks down to drop a muah! on Christopher's head, presses a quick one to Buck's cheek. "I'm off! Love you both, see you for dinner!"
Eddie sweeps out of the door in a whirlwind of frantic energy. Buck just watches him go, mouth half-open in a soft 'o' as the skin of his cheek tingles where Eddie's lips had been. He stares at the closed door with wide eyes, stares for so long his mouth goes dry.
Maybe he does have the answers, maybe he's had a couch all along.
A sharp tug on his shirt pulls him from his trance, and he looks down at Christopher.
"Cookies?" he says, entirely too knowing for an eleven-almost-twelve-year-old.
"Cookies," Buck nods.
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cinnbar-bun · 5 months
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Ace x Reader General HCs
Rating: SFW + NSFW (separated)
GN Reader
You can read on my AO3 here!
SFW
A loveable goofball who is like a puppy around you. It’s adorable but also, everyone in the Whitebeard Pirates roasts the hell out of him for how whipped he is for you. 
He has many different ways of reacting to you, depending on his mood, but there are a few sides that are common. 
Puppy Dog: Full blown puppy, golden retriever energy. He’s at your every beck and call and with a dopey smile on his face as he stands beside you. So happy and eager, and nary a frown in sight as he wants to cuddle and hug you lots. 
Flustered/Shy: This happens occasionally when you act forward with him/he’s caught off guard. He will turn the prettiest shade of red and his jaw will drop as he looks at you. Often mumbles and whines while covering his mouth. His face burns brighter if you or the other members bring it up. 
Smooth Operator: Unlike the other times when he turns into a tomato or suddenly becomes a dog, this is when he decides to “play” with you a bit. Sometimes teases you and whispers sweet-nothings in your ear. At this stage, he’s at his A-game and can handle whatever you throw at him (whether it’s your cute smile or flirting). Super into PDA and doesn’t react much besides laughing if the others tease him.
But regardless of what “side” of him appears, it’s always obvious how much he loves you. Marco jokingly asks when the wedding is and Whitebeard gruffly says he will host the biggest celebration for your wedding. 
Side note: if you two do actually go through with a wedding- Whitebeard doing his best to stay composed while a singular tear drops down his cheeks as you and Ace get married. He’s the proudest papa ever. 
Ace gets pouty and annoyed often if your attention is elsewhere. It’s never obsessive or intruding, but more like a “aw, and I thought you loved me,” type of joke where he wants a kiss on the cheek to “make him feel better”. 
Loves when you wear his hat and pose with it. 
Ace, despite his free nature, really does appreciate how you take care of him and ground him. Lord knows he jumps headfirst into things without thinking, so having you there is his reminder to take his life a bit more seriously. 
Sometimes, Ace questions how he got so lucky to have you in his life. It was just by chance you two met, but every day he feels blessed knowing he’s got you. Occasionally, he wonders if you’d ever leave him for someone “better”, but then you give him that smile and all his fears melt away.
Seriously, not joking, Ace’s favorite part of you is your smile. Your smile is gorgeous. Your smile is everything. Especially when you two are sailing together, or watching the sunset, or under a starry sky, he’s entranced by you. You have his whole heart, and when he sees you smile, he’s reminded of how badly he wants to explore the world with you and protect you. You’re his reason to keep fighting and living. 
NSFW 
When it comes to sex, Ace is eager. He’s not Sanji-levels of desperate, but if you’re offering, he’s taking it at any opportunity. 
Does not mind if it’s in public, on the floor, outside, in the back of an alley- if he’s having sex with you he doesn’t care. 
Ass man. Loves ass, loves your ass. He wants to bite your ass, spank your ass, eat your ass, fuck your ass- he just loves your booty. 
Also, if you wanted to eat his ass, hey, he ain’t complaining, either. You can do him in the ass as well! 
Major switch energy. He doesn’t mind being either the top or the bottom, because sex with him honestly just always ends up becoming you two mindlessly and energetically moving against each other. 
He’s very sloppy when it comes to sex. Not exactly in a bad way, but Ace is so eager to get it on with you that he’s just so wild and crazy in bed. Will go round after round just thrusting wildly into you. He loses some of his brain cells whenever he has sex with you, and just reverts to his base desires. 
The “sides” to him from the SFW portion apply here, too. Sometimes he will happily go at it with you and make stupid jokes. Sometimes he will be a blushing, whimpering mess as you have him on all fours, other times he will be whispering in your ear how good you feel while his fingers are caressing your lower half. 
Ace truly brings the heat during sex, no part of you will be untouched or unloved when you’re with him. He’s in love with your body and every part of you.
He does like certain aspects of roleplay, but he’s not too big on it. If you wore an outfit or made him wear one, that’s probably as far as it goes alongside a few quips before he’s moaning and yelling how amazing your ass feels. 
Also not too heavily into complete domination or submission. He doesn’t do well with mixing kinks into your daily lives, so he’s not going to be one to establish or follow “rules” or demand any expectation from you that you must follow outside of the bedroom. He’s pretty go-with-the-flow so he’d rather just have sex whenever ya’ll feel like it whatever way you two want it. 
Not too into heavily degradation. He can use some basic words like “whore” or “brat”, whatever, but he doesn’t find degrading you enjoyable for him. He loves you too much to truly degrade you, and most of his dirty talk is lewd praise. He also doesn’t care for being heavily degraded back. 
Now, praise? This boy has the biggest praise kink ever. Call him a “good boy” or compliment his body and he’ll have a proud look on his face as he continues to pleasure you. Seriously, praise him- you won’t regret it!
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incognito-girl · 5 months
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entertainment - A. RUSSO
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“hi pretty!” you hear the blonde Italian girl shout from the kitchen. You had left Alessia alone for the majority of the day as you and your friends had decided to have a girls day together. The pair of you spend the day shopping getting food and catching up with each other as your schedules usually conflict, so your girlfriend had been left alone all day waiting patiently for you to come home. When she got the message from you saying you were on your way she almost jumped out of her seat with excitement.
she sat waiting for you before she realised that she could make you a nice dinner and get in your good books. so she immediately hopped off the couch turned off the television and ran to the kitchen in hopes to find something she could easily make before you got home. she ruffled though the cabinets in your shared home to find pasta and sauce, a discrace to her Italian heritage but she put it off with a shrug knowing it would be easy for her to make for you.
her eyes light up when she sees you. you left after her today with her having training early this morning so she hadn't had the chance to properly see you previous to this, and when the first time she sees you is when your hair is done perfectly and you are wearing her favourite pair of jeans it certainly makes her day that much brighter. she sees the collection of bags that were in your hands inwardly rolling her eyes at you, not wanting to think about how much you had spent today. “hi darling” you say while placing a kiss to her cheek. “you missed” she mumbles grabbing your hips to keep you in place. you look at her with a grin and place a sweet kiss to her lips. “not long enough” she says letting go of you tapping your bum lightly. “what are you cooking” you say laughing slightly at your girlfriend. “pasta with sauce” she says not really paying attention to you as she went back to stirring the pasta. “wow, nonna wouldn't be proud Lessi” you say, acting hurt placing a hand over your heart. “oh shush, don't act like you don't have this for dinner most nights anyway” “shut up” you mumble back as she laughs at you.
after you had both had more than your fair share of the pasta your girlfriend had cooked, she had requested dome after dinner entertainment - a fashion show of everything you bought. “god less with how bloated i am i don't know if ill fit into anything i bought anymore.” you say laughing while rubbing your stomach as if you were pregnant. “shush, you will. stop being so silly.” she mumbles into your neck while wrapping her hands around you pulling you into a tight embrace. You both stood there for a few minutes in each others embrace before the blonde girl suddenly spun you around by your hips pressed a kiss to your lips then demanded to see all your new clothes. “ugh it’s just so much effort though.” you say looking up at her through your eyelashes - giving her puppy eyes to try convince her to not make you show her. “nope that wont work. go. i want to see.” she retaliated, pushing you away from her. you moan at her for this while taking off the hoodie you had on all day leaving you in a white t-shirt. you threw the piece of clothing at her as she sat down laughing at you.
after changing into a new dress you bought you went out to the girl who was waiting patiently for you as she sat on her phone. “ta-dah!” you shout out to the girl while doing a little spin to let her see the dress. once you stop your eyes fall onto the girl properly, the hoodie that once was on you had now taken residence on your girlfriend. a big grin had fallen onto her lips as she looked at you. “looking beautiful as ever, mrs russo.” she said standing up offering her sleeve covered hand to you to spin you around. “not mrs russo.” you say wiggling your fingers in her face hinting at an engagement ring. “soon enough i’ll have my very own mrs russo” she said while kissing your hand. “hmm when’s soon enough?” you question wrapping your hands around her waist. “that’s a secret i’ll never tell” she said while quickly lifting you up and wrapping your legs around her waist, forcing you to put your hands on her neck. “i love you.” she whispered onto your lips, her lips ghosting over yours before she pulled away, dropping you. “Now” she starts before pulling your dress back down, “show me the rest of what you bought.”
after a gruelling half an hour of changing clothes constantly you were perched on the blondes lap dawned in her oldest tracksuit and jersey. her last name on your back that she was tracing while half listening to you go on about your day. the remote in your hand as you try to find something to watch on netflix. “then i came home to you.” you finished looking back at your girlfriend who had a small smile on her face. “fun day?” she asks pulling you further into her. “mhm, best day. especially coming home to you.” you answer her. “you want to know the best thing about my day?” she whispers to you. “of course” you quickly answer very eager to hear about her day. “you walking through the door and seeing your beautiful smile.” “little liar” you retort with a little smirk before leaning into the older girl and locking lips for the hundredth time that day. each kiss just as exciting as the first.
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neuvistar · 1 year
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JUST FOR TONIGHT.
— featuring ┊ dan heng x fem!reader
— warnings / content warnings ┊SPOILERS FOR HONKAI STAR RAIL. (?) dan heng’s dragon form bruh, hear me out on this one, oral sex (f!receiving), squirting, you grab dan heng’s horns as he eats u out like a mad man, um um um pussydrunk!dan heng me thinks, oh my days dan heng’s dragon form omyomymomygodsh, use of nicknames, overall suggestive content || 18+ MINORS DO NOT INTERACT
— a/n. bro god has not been on my side lately i’m not getting anything done I’m so sorry i have a life out of tumblr n sometimes i just poof, so i’m sorry but anyways i reached lvl 40 on hsr i need to touch grass me thinks also this is kidna short but i have an excuse i stopped n kept writing n stopped n kept writing n then rushed it n got lazy wooohoooo (oops)
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✦ 𝐃𝐀𝐍 𝐇𝐄𝐍𝐆
“y—you want me to what?”
-
honestly, you should feel guilty for asking dan heng something so absurd, but it was worth it. i mean, how can he decline when he’s faced with a smiley you, all pretty and dolled up, eager for him to please you, and most importantly eager for him to absolutely ruin you. he was kneeling infront of you, those sweet pretty eyes of his gazing straight into yours, blazing with hunger. he leans forward as he slowly began to plant small yet gentle kisses on your thigh, the shy yet lustful look remains on his face. it’s clear that he's enjoying this.. far too much.
“..are you sure you want this?” he mutters in a soft, raspy voice as he stares at her exposed form, his dark eyes are practically burning with the desire he feels towards her as he grew impatient, wanting to taste you right here and now.
you nodded, reaching down to caress his soft dark locks as he melted in your touch, as red spread across his cheeks. “relax, of course i want this, i’m all yours anyway. why do you think i asked you in the first place?”
“i just don’t want to be rough with you. i don’t want to go too far or anything.”
you pause for a moment, the desire in your eyes growing as you smirk at him, slightly tugging on his locks as you gazed down at him lovingly, “what if i want you to be rough with me?” his dark eyes burn brighter, the fires of lust and hunger engulfing the man's soul as he sees how much you want him, craving him, how much you need him, god.. it only drives him crazy.
“fuck.. you’re getting me all riled up, angel.” dan heng bit his lip as you feel his fingers hook into the hem of your panties, slowly dragging them down before suddenly ripping them apart with his bare hands, letting you feel the cold air on your soaking cunt. “hope you can take everything i give you, baby. you’re a strong girl, aren’t you? you should be able to.”
he spread your legs as he held them down, feeling the wetness of his tongue on your slit. he was just getting started, yet sinful sounds came out of your mouth already. you could feel the softness of dan heng’s skin as it rubs against your own, shoving his tongue inside your hole. not a even a few minutes in and he was already slurping up your juices like it was his last meal. you were absolutely stunning in his point of view, he couldn’t get enough of how hot you looked, how hot you looked with the hem of your shirt in your mouth as an attempt to put a stop to the lead sounds you let out, cock throbbing in his pants at the sight. dan heng’s hands slide between your thighs pushing your legs wider apart, feeling your body shiver as his palms brush over your warm skin, a whimper of pleasure slipping past your lips. he was lapping at your juices like it was no tomorrow, rubbing his thumb on your bud at a harsh pace as he works wonders on your cunt, eating you out like some mad man, he wasn’t ashamed one bit. he wanted to ruin you, he wanted you to remember how good his tongue felt, how skilled he really is.
“danheng.. shit..”you reach down, running your fingers through his hair as your hands slowly run up towards his horns, back arching at how well he was eating you out as his tongue swirled around your bud, sucking and nibbling on it. you whined as you held onto his horns for support, feeling him grunt against you as low vibrations rumbled through your skin. he couldn’t take it, he couldn’t hold himself back. he interlocked his arms with your thighs, digging his face into your pussy even more, desperate and hungry for more.
“s—shit.. sweetheart. ‘keep doin’ that.”
he slid two fingers inside your cunt, a warm thickness that was almost enough to make you cum on the spot, overwhelming you with pleasure. he savoured your taste, he wanted more of it. he wanted more of you and your taste as he circled his tongue around your clit, fingers pumping in and out as they slid in and out of you, the lewd sounds of squelching filling the whole room as he crooks them perfectly, plunging them in your deepest areas as wetness began to coat around his fingers, indicating that your orgasm was close.
“d—danheng..”you tightened your grip around his horns, making him moan against your folds as you threw your head back. the feeling of your fingers shaking around his horns drove him to the edge, as if it made something within him snap in a millisecond.. he just love how soft your hands felt around his horns, groaning at the way his cock throbbed when you did so, palming himself gently through his pants. he looked up at you as he saw the way your head was thrown back, the way your legs spread even more as if it was asking him to eat you out even more, cheeks flushed and eyes rolling back to the back of your head, you couldn’t take it anymore. “dan heng.. c-can’t anymore— ‘m gonna cum, please!”
you tried pushing him off of you, which only lead him to tighten his grip around your thighs, pressing himself closer against your cunt as the flicking of his tongue never stopped one bit, he wanted more, way more, more than he was given. he wanted so much more of you, eating you out once wasn’t enough, he wanted to savour in your taste, he just couldn’t.. couldn’t get enough of you. dan heng wasn’t usually this hungry for you, but tonight was a whole different story.
“‘m gonna cum! gonna cum..!” you buck your hips against him, it’s happening once again, that feeling in your stomach. your aching pussy spasmed around his tongue, tightening around him so well so he could savour every single ridge of your insides gazing up at you as you cried out, reaching your orgasm as you squirted all over his face, panting heavily as the blush on your face reddened completely. dan heng pulled away from you, sliding his fingers out of you as well before licking his lips, wiping his cheek with a slight smirk. both of your thighs shook viciously, wetting the bedsheets underneath making a mess.
“look at the mess you made, baby.” he chuckled before leaning down once more, bringing his tongue down to lick your dripping slit once more. “it would be a such shame if you made even more of a mess, wouldn’t it?”
oh yeah, he wasn’t done with you. he wanted more alright.
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jgracie · 9 days
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LOVE GROWS (WHERE MY ROSEMARY GOES) — PERCY + CHILD OF DEMETER
masterlist | rules
❝ Hiya,can i request if you have time,Percy dating a Demeter kid?Thank you💕 ❞ — anon
in which percy dates a child of demeter
pairing percy jackson x demeter!reader
warnings me projecting as a child of demeter LOL, one swear word
on the radio . . . love grows (where my rosemary goes) (edison lighthouse)
an never stop requesting demeter!reader guys (i live vicariously through her) also this features another travis cameo LOL him and percy are bffs in my head ALSO the watering can thing is inspired by stardew valley i cannot wait for the day i get to upgrade to sprinklers
Percy’s never been a morning person. However, he has been forced awake at ungodly times due to nightmares
This was one of those times. He could barely remember what the dream was about, all he knew was that it was bad enough for him to wake with a start, his body drenched in sweat as he tried to recollect himself
Looking over at the clock on his bedside table, Percy could barely make out the time: 5:35AM. Well, there was no point going back to sleep now. Even if he did, he’d probably just be visited by nightmares again
So, Percy slipped the nearest t-shirt on and left his cabin, unsure of where he was heading - maybe the beach to cool off? Who knows, he was in disarray. The worst dreams were always the ones you couldn’t remember, the fear of them possibly being important haunting your day
Suddenly, Percy smelt a comforting scent waft through the air. He’d never smelt anything like that before. It couldn’t be ambrosia or nectar - while they both had good scents, they weren’t half as strong as this one. What could it be?
He decided to follow his instinct and find where the smell was coming from. Which led him to cabin 4
Despite it being right across from his own, Percy never paid cabin 4 much attention. Not until now
He continued following the scent and ended up at the back of the cabin, where there was a huge garden filled with what Percy believed to be the most appetising fruits and vegetables he’s ever seen. To the side, there was a greenhouse, where he could see the silhouette of a person
Curious, Percy made his way over to the greenhouse. He’d never spoken to a Demeter kid before, but he’d heard of your nurturing nature and kind hearts in passing
“It’s okay, Cassie, you can go back to sleep. I’ll be here when you wake up, I promise,” Percy heard a voice say, stopping in his tracks. Deciding to take a peek, he found himself facing an angel
You were rocking a young girl who seemed to be six years old at most back to sleep in your arms. Wherever you went, the flowers in the greenhouse bloomed brighter, gravitating towards you and wrapping their stems around your arms, almost as if they were vying for your attention
The girl’s face was tear-streaked, but she nodded, nuzzling into the crook of your neck. You smiled and ran your fingers through her hair, praying to your mother that she wouldn’t have another nightmare
You hated when the younger kids got nightmares - they could barely understand the fact that one of their parents is a God, let alone comprehend the strange demigod nightmares
Then, you noticed him. When you locked eyes, Percy felt as if the last puzzle piece of his life was finally put in place. Was it too early to say you were made for him?
“Hello! Welcome to Flowers and Vines (shoutout to Stella for naming it!), how may I help you today?” You said, your cheery tone snapping Percy out of the trance you put him in. Walking inside (he’d been simply listening next to the door), Percy sheepishly rubbed his neck, hoping you didn’t think he was some weird stalker
Percy looked around, now fully being able to see everything your greenhouse had to offer. His mom would love this place
“Oh, I’m good, thanks… I didn’t know you guys had a flower shop here! That’s really cool…” Percy said, trailing off at the end once he realised he didn’t know your name. He was a little embarrassed, but luckily, you didn’t seem to mind
Giggling, you continued for him, “Y/N, my name’s Y/N. And Flowers and Vines is more than just a flower shop, we sell produce too! Mr D’s kids help us with the grapes.” As you told him all of this, you were going around with a pretty pink watering can and watering every single plant in the whole greenhouse. Surely, there must be a more efficient way to water them all?
That morning, Percy decided he would buy a flower from you. When you’d asked which one he wanted, he simply told you to surprise him
“These are some of my favourites,” you said while wrapping your flowers of choice - to Percy, they looked like every other pink, round flower out there, but he’d learn the difference for you. These were now special
Handing him the little bouquet, you continued, “Rhododendron - ‘I shall never look upon your like again’, that’s what they mean. I don’t see them around much anymore, which is why I planted them here!”
It was almost like you knew Percy would never look upon your like again. When he’d asked you how much they were for, you insisted on giving them to him on the house. After much arguing, Percy accepted, keeping them right next to his bed. Something about them made the nightmares a little better
After that day, Percy couldn’t stop thinking about you. Everything he saw around him reminded him of you - from the flowers in the forest to the smell of mangoes in the air as their season arrived
He’d see you occasionally, too, and would shyly wave whilst hoping you didn’t notice the way his face turned a bright red when you waved back
You thought Percy was really cute, too, and were a little disappointed when he didn’t show up a second time after your original rendezvous. You began taking on so many shifts you might as well have been working at Flowers and Vines full time. Your siblings (as well as Dionysus’ kids) teased you relentlessly for this, but you didn’t care. You just wanted to see him again
And then you did
Percy’s idea was one that was suggested by none other than Travis Stoll. He was simply catching up with the son of Hermes when he’d brought up the fact that everyone working at Flowers and Vines watered the plants using watering cans (something which had been really bothering Katie)
When Percy had asked why they did that, Travis explained that they used to have sprinklers but after the Ares cabin tinkered with them once (they were bitter over a game of Capture the Flag), causing the water to go all over the place and killing a lot of the flowers, the sprinklers were unusable and currently being fixed by the Hephaestus cabin
That’s when Percy came up with it. Since he was a son of Poseidon, he could spread water from a source as far as he wanted to. Therefore, he could help with your issue and have an excuse to talk to you
Immediately, Percy ran to the flower shop/fruit market he’d grown to love so dearly
“Hi! Is Y/N here?” He asked one of your siblings, breathless. They nodded and pointed behind them, smirking as they snuck knowing glances to your other siblings
There you were, in all your glory. You seemed to sparkle under the Sun, watering the flowers with your little pink pot. When the water ran out, you sighed. You really needed to invest in a bigger one
Just as you were about to go fill it, Percy proudly announced, “you won’t have to do that anymore!”
You couldn’t believe your ears. As you turned around, you fought the urge to hug the boy. Despite only speaking with him once, you really did miss Percy
Intrigued, you followed Percy to the fountain in the middle of the greenhouse. Before, it used to just be for decoration (since you had sprinklers), but now it came very handy for refilling your watering cans
Extending his arm towards the fountain, Percy willed droplets of water to hover in the air, then, with one motion, threw them all over the greenhouse, watering your plants perfectly
“Oh my Gods, Percy, this is amazing! Thank you so much!” You exclaimed, running over to him and giving him a peck on the cheek. It was a spontaneous decision mainly done because you were getting quite tired of manually watering all your plants
After that, Percy began working at Flowers and Vines as your temporary plant-waterer. You, your siblings and Dionysus’ kids would all cheer when he’d appear, and he’d play into it, making a big show out of getting the water out of the fountain and sprinkling it over the plants, winking at you as he did so
The plants seemed to flourish even more than usual, too. You told yourself it was probably because water from a son of Poseidon was more powerful than normal water (or something along those lines), but you knew the truth
As a child of Demeter, much like your mother, your emotions influenced nature around you. When you were sad, plants would wilt and wither, mimicking the winter Demeter creates whenever Persephone is in the Underworld
The opposite was true. Whenever you were happy, plants would blossom and bloom all around - and you were really happy when Percy was around. Which is why you needed to tell him before the Hephaestus cabin fixed your sprinklers
However, fear got the best of you every time you tried to get the words out of your mouth. Despite practising several times with your siblings (and even once with the Aphrodite cabin), whenever you tried telling Percy, you’d get shy and vines would grow out of your head, tangling with your hair and acting as a shield
Unfortunately for you, Percy couldn’t tell from that that you liked him, so you simply had to get over your fears and say it
Your confession happened on Percy’s last day as your plant waterer. That morning, Katie had pulled you to the side, telling you to hurry up your confession to Percy as she and Travis couldn’t delay the Hephaestus cabin any more (they were getting quite annoyed, having worked on the sprinklers for so long. What did those Ares kids do to them?)
So, you spent the whole day bracing yourself for Percy’s arrival. All you had to do was say it, get his response and move on with your life. It wasn’t that big of a deal!
After Percy watered the plants, everyone watched in silence, waiting for you to say something
“Hey… Percy, can we talk?” You asked, ignoring the hushed cheers of your siblings as you approached the boy. He nodded, smiling at you and letting you lead him to the back, where you kept all the extra supplies
Sitting on a stool, Percy looked up at you, just noticing your nervousness, “is everything okay?” He asked, concern laced in his voice
You nodded, taking a deep breath. You practically had this memorised. You just had to get the words out. You couldn’t get the words out
The vines grew from your head again and you wanted nothing more than to cocoon yourself in them. You’d faced terrifying monsters with a calm smile and eliminated them like you were pulling weeds out of your gardens, but you couldn’t tell a boy you liked him?
At this point, the vines were wrapping around the stool Percy was sat on, and he stood up, confused
Slowly, he made his way over to you and brushed the vines away from your face. As he looked into your wide eyes, he finally understood. Cupping your face with his hands, Percy placed a tender kiss on your lips
“I like you too, Y/N. Like, a lot”
Ok dating hcs 🥳
First of all I just wanna say PICNIC DATES!!! Sometimes you have them on the beach and it’s like you combined both your worlds <3
As a child of Demeter I can confidently say we know how to cook. Percy’s so in love with your cooking. He never thought any cooking could rival his mother’s until you came along
Somehow, you knew how to make meals that make him feel all warm and fuzzy inside. If you asked him to taste ambrosia and one of your meals blindfolded and then choose one, he’d choose yours in a heartbeat
He’s also so obsessed with the fresh produce you bring from Flowers and Vines. I said this in my Percy x Persephone!Reader headcanons but I don’t think Percy’s much of a fruits/vegetables guy so the fact that you have him hooked on them says a lot
Swears he’s addicted. You think he’s just saying that to flatter you but he means it. If someone asked him if he had an addiction he’d look them dead in the eye and go, “yes, my partner’s bell peppers.”
He’s actually right though! Demeter + Dionysus kid powers make the produce taste a little fresher and last for way longer
Percy also decides to learn the language of flowers. He borrows a book about it from the Athena cabin and makes little notes and everything
Once, you came to his cabin and found the book full of scrawled annotations and sticky notes in it and you had to fight the urge to bawl your eyes out because he’s just so adorable
Will literally buy you flowers from your own flower shop though LMAO he doesn’t even try to do the transaction with anyone else. He’ll buy them and you’ll give them to him and he’ll be like “oh thanks I’m gonna go give this to the light of my life now” and he just hands them back to you
Percy’s also def the type of guy to keep one with him so he can get you new ones as soon as they start to wilt. Except his timing is always off because flowers tend to last a little longer when they’re around you
Lowkey still works at Flowers and Vines except he just follows you around and has no salary (he says his salary are kisses from you but knows he’d get them regardless LOL)
Brings Sally and Paul to Flowers and Vines and they’re immediately hooked because flowers in the mortal world aren’t half as beautiful as these hello??
Also, as a child of Demeter, you are naturally very motherly and caring. He loves seeing you interact with Estelle so much!!!
His half-sister warmed up to you extremely quickly and now refuses to be babysat by anyone who isn’t you. Like it can’t even be Percy alone you have to be there!!
Percy ALSO loves it when you dote on him. This leads to him being a little dramatic at times
Looking up, you saw a pouty Percy make his way over to you, his brows furrowed as he looked down at his finger
“Y/N! You won’t believe what happened!” He said. The first couple times he pulled this stunt, he’d scared you shitless, but you now knew all about your boyfriend’s antics and simply gave him a knowing smile
Feigning worry, you asked, “oh no, what is it?” Percy revealed his finger to you, which had a barely noticeable cut at the tip of it
“I was talking to Clarisse when all of a sudden she swung at me!” He told you, looking over to the side. In reality, he’d asked Clarisse to cut him, knowing only a child of Ares could have such precision with a weapon
Sporting a pout of your own, you took Percy’s finger and peppered it with kisses, “I’ll speak to Clarisse, don’t worry.” You said
“Uhh.. Y/N.. she also punched me in the lips… My lips really hurt.”
Let’s just say you didn’t get much work done that day (SAFE FOR WORK!)
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pengujoon · 6 months
Text
A SILENT WISH
cont. inumaki toge x reader, fluff. inumaki misses reader very very much. living together au, post high school timeline (?), intentional lowercase.
a/n. happy birthday my favourite boy. inumaki's my first fav from jjk even before i got deep into this so he holds a special place in my heart
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you had been away overseas for work for what felt like an eternity, and inumaki hadn’t been able to hide his lowkey yearning for your return. it had been two long months, and his birthday was just around the corner. little did he know that gojo was behind a plan to surprise him, with you as the ultimate gift.
as inumaki’s birthday approached, you and gojo plotted in secret, arranging everything meticulously. when the day finally came, you were hidden away in the cozy little apartment you shared with inumaki. the excitement bubbled within you, knowing that your surprise was about to unfold.
the apartment was dimly lit, with a delicious cake resting on the table. inumaki’s eyes sparkled with anticipation as he prepared to blow out the candles. gojo, ever the instigator, leaned in and asked with a mischievous glint in his eye, “inumaki, what did you wish for?”
inumaki sighed, a tinge of sadness in his voice, and he closed his eyes to make a silent wish. but as he blew out the candles, he felt someone’s hands over his eyes, and he thought they were gojo’s hands.
he shook his head dejectedly, not expecting his wish to come true anytime soon.
then, the hands over inumaki’s eyes were suddenly removed, and he blinked in confusion. in front of him stood not only gojo but also panda and maki, all of them grinning as if they were in on a secret. but there was more. inumaki felt hands on his shoulders, and his heart raced. there should only be three people in the room, right? the three people were standing before him, so who…?
gojo and panda smiled knowingly, with a phone in gojo’s hand, and maki smiled too. inumaki’s confusion turned to curiosity.
then, in a soft whisper, you spoke into inumaki’s ear, “boo.”
inumaki whipped his head back so quickly it was a wonder it didn’t spin off. his eyes widened, disbelief and joy washing over his face in equal measure. there you were, standing before him, your smile radiant, and your eyes filled with warmth and love.
inumaki couldn’t contain himself any longer. he pulled you into a tight, almost crushing embrace. the world faded away, and for a moment, there was only the two of you. he carried you and spun you around, laughing like a child, his happiness radiating from him.
as he finally put you down, inumaki held you so tightly it was as if he never wanted to let go. his eyes shone with the light that had returned, and a tear of pure happiness escaped, glistening in the soft light of the room. he couldn’t speak, but he didn’t need to. his actions and the depth of his emotions said it all. you had given him the greatest birthday gift of all, and he was completely smitten, unable to contain his overflowing love for you.
“oh, there, there,” you whispered, gently running your fingers through his hair, savoring the feeling of his warmth and the silky texture of his hair. “i’m back.”
inumaki, with tearful eyes of happiness, looked into your eyes, his smile brighter than ever. his voice quivered as he whispered softly, “konbu konbu,” a phrase you understood as a tearful “welcome back!”
in that moment, the world outside ceased to exist. it was just you and inumaki, wrapped in each other’s arms, a beautiful reunion that neither of you would ever forget.
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oh to have someone this excited upon seeing me 😭
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