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#that boy is fucked up in 8 different direction and I need someone to take care of that.
dirtytransmasc · 1 year
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Miles "Spider" Socorro Needs a Hug
Is already a tag you can filter by on ao3.
this boy has barely lived and breathed on the big screens a month, and this tag already exists for him, that has to say something.
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blouisparadise · 6 months
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Today we have the third part of our angst rec list for you to check out! You can find part one here and part two here. The fics on this list are all amazing, so please be sure to read them, give them kudos, and leave a comment for the author. If you enjoy our rec lists, please like this post and reblog it to help spread the word. Happy reading!
1) Please, Don’t Say You Want Me | Explicit | 9,320 words
Prompt 496: ABO/royalty AU. Where Omega Prince Louis is forced to marry alpha King Harry by his father for the benefit of their kingdom. After the wedding, Harry lets Louis know that he didn’t want a mate and to not expect a relationship from him. Since they are already mated, Harry has to officially reject Louis’s omega to break ties. This practice is so taboo that he doesn’t know the omega has a maximum of a year left to live after rejection. As time goes on, the omega gets weaker and weaker.
2) All This Delusion In Our Heads | Explicit | 15,088 words
After Harry and Louis break up, they cope with it in very different ways. What will happen when Harry keeps calling his ex over when things go wrong in his life, but Louis just can't take it anymore?
3) Dandelion Heart | Explicit | 17,563 words
After his sister’s death, Louis is granted full custody of his 4-year-old nephew, TJ. It isn’t easy, but with the help of TJ’s other uncle, Harry, they learn to make it work.
4) Death Wish | Explicit | 22,067 words
Louis hates vampires, he lives his life trying to kill as many as he can, night after night, year after year. He hates them. Then why the fuck is he kissing one? Again. “I mean it, Harry.” Louis says, into his mouth this time. “You need to get the fuck away from me.”
5) The Games We Play | Explicit | 23,448 words
Louis is a political lobbyist who chose his career over his personal life a long time ago and has never regretted it. Then he met Harry.
6) Bloom | Explicit | 24,887 words
When they first meet at Harry’s flower truck, Harry falls hard but Louis’ unavailable. Only before long, Harry reignites a spark that Louis thought long forgotten.
7) Somebody's Got Your Trainers On (It's You) | Explicit | 28,000 words
Louis hasn't thought about Harry since half an hour after the shift started, when Krystle told him that she was binging Gogglebox last night and therefore didn't get enough sleep - a sure reminder of Harry’s temporary Gogglebox obsession. Five hours isn't much without thinking about someone, but that's as long as it gets. Louis came to terms with that two years ago. When Harry walked out the door with his stupid New Balance trainers and never looked back.
8) The Road Not Taken | Explicit | 30,393 words
The one where Harry returns back home for the holidays after a successful debut album, leaving Louis to unwrap gifts as well as old complicated feelings. Cue: hometown holiday hookups, overbearing siblings, and a disastrous New Year’s Eve party. A 'Tis’ the Damn Season' inspired AU.
9) Compass To The Soul | Teen & Up | 31,439 words
Harry Styles, alpha, is 1/4 of the perfect pack, and 1/5 of world famous boy band One Direction. He spends his time touring the world with his best friends and family. Louis Tomlinson, omega, is 1/5 of world famous boy band One Direction. He spends his time hoping his bandmates don’t notice him.
10) Like The Stars Above | Explicit | 33,759 words
Louis has a witchy little secret that is slowly ruining his relationship. When that secret comes out, it turns out that he has a lot more to worry about than just losing the love of his life. He might lose everything.
11) Close To Nowhere | Explicit | 34,589 words
Louis and Harry are psychics who kind of hate each other. They go to Tennessee to investigate a haunting.
12) Just A Pretty Boy | Explicit | 35,614 words
The alpha in front of him wasn’t only tall, but used every inch of his body to look even more threatening. He looked as shocked as Joseph felt, in his eyes he could clearly see horror and anger mixed into an odd and painful mix. It was as if he just watched a ghost or a monster from a nightmare come to life.  “Louis…” he said with a low voice. It wasn’t a question, he was calling Joseph by that name.  The crease between Joseph’s brows deepened. “Who?” Louis and Harry were married until, one day, Louis passed away in a tragic accident. Years later, he is found alive and with a thousand questions plaguing his mind. The most important ones; was his husband involved in his disappearance? And, how long did it take Harry and his best friend to fall in love after his supposed dead?
13) Best Colours For Your Portrait | Explicit | 37,717 words
Louis bites his lip in, his eyes leaving Harry's face, they are cast low as he takes a deep breath before sighing, "In solitude, I felt the liberty you spoke of." "But," The omega glances up, his eyebrows twitching as he brings his face closer to Harry's neck to overpower the alpha's scent with his scent, "I mostly felt your absence."
14) Give Me Love | Explicit | 41,041 words
Despite being an omega, Louis’ always had a blatant dislike of alphas.
15) Letters To June | Explicit | 41,150 words
It's 1915, Europe is in the middle of the Great War. Omega Louis decides to join the Letter Home Project to become someone’s penfriend. Through this he meets a lovely soldier who hasn't got anyone else to send a letter to. Along with his letter, comes a picture of the most handsome alpha Louis has ever seen.
16) Strangers In Love | Explicit | 42,207 words
Louis wakes up to find himself in a marriage with the last man he thought he'd ever end up with.
17) This Glass House | Mature | 43,072 words
While deployed, Alpha Harry gets injured by an IED explosion, leaving him to deal with severe injuries in its devastating aftermath. During his road to acceptance and recovery he learns with the help of Louis and their children just how important family can be for the mind, body, and soul.
18) Oubaitori | Explicit | 48,822 words
Note: This fic is locked and can only be read by AO3 users.
After a year away, Harry comes back to his hometown ready to shoulder the responsibilities that come with being a Styles. However, an unforeseen return will greatly setback his plans as he finds himself confronting ghosts of the past, his prejudice, and a torrent of feelings he thought were long-buried. In the midst of a battle between protection and progress, trust that was once broken will try and pierce through walls of convictions he built around himself, leaving him grasping for power he is unsure he even wants. Meanwhile, Louis merely tries to save his family and make the next day better than the last. As he faces his past wrongdoings and the scars they left, chances will be granted to him - either to repair what was once broken or finally find closure. Torn between the desire to defend himself and the fear of the truth being rejected, he will learn peace comes from honesty - and that sometimes, what appears to be the easiest solution simply was the most coveted one.
19) Untamed Hearts Align | Explicit | 55,795 words
For as long as Louis has known her, Lady Margaret Tomlinson has had two aspirations for the remaining years of her life. The first was to out-dress the Duchess of Kent at every soirée and gathering. The second was to marry off her omega nephew to the most honorable – and highly ranked – alpha suitor she could find. He does not expect for her to arrange a marriage between him and the crown prince, and he certainly does not expect to fall for him. Everything changes when Harry disappears.
20) If You’re Out There (I’ll Find You Somehow) | Explicit | 55,916 words
Harry looks so intensely into Louis’ eyes it’s as though he’s reaching in and touching his very soul. “I never thought… I never… I’ve been searching for so long, Louis, but I never gave up. I couldn’t stop, wouldn’t stop trying,” Harry says, bottom lip trembling as he strokes the backs of Louis’ knuckles. “I just knew that if you were out there, I’d find you somehow.”
21) Of Lost Things | Explicit | 57,980 words
Louis comes with a familiarity Harry has never felt with anyone else before. After their fateful meeting, their chemistry became undeniable, and soon after, Harry had felt like he hit the jackpot when it came to finding the person he would spend the rest of his life with. But all relationships come with their own unique problems, and Harry soon realizes that their relationship is no different. When their problems go from unordinary to nearly bizarre in nature, he takes it upon himself to find an answer to their troubles. What he stumbles upon are terrifying coincidences between his and Louis’ story, and the ill-fated mythological couple, Orpheus and Eury. But it’s all they are; just coincidences, ones that feel as frighteningly familiar as Louis. Except… what if none of this is a coincidence? What if everything Harry has always seen as fiction is true, and myth—or rather, history, is about to repeat itself?
22) But We Have Promises To Keep | Mature | 62,608 words
Note: This fic is the fourth part in a series. We'd recommend reading the other fics first, though none of them have smut.
Maybe, Louis thought, from the beginning to the end, he had always known exactly what he wanted. He had always heard it, a quiet song in his head never giving up, because it had never been a thing apart from who he was. Someone who wouldn’t stop. Someone who could walk out into the dark, seeing nothing, having little, and still looking. The undeniable, terrifying, gorgeous truth was always going to be this: that he had a heart, and that that heart wanted to live.
23) Sink Into Your Sunlight | Explicit | 79,601 words
Louis hadn’t forgotten about Harry as much as he tried. It wasn’t due to the strange nature of their meeting, more so the magnetic pull he somehow had on Louis. He couldn’t fathom why this complete stranger stayed in his mind as much as he tried to stop it. Any time his phone sounded his heart skipped a beat at the thought of it possibly being Harry. In all honesty, it made him feel sort of pathetic. Gay guy falls for straight guy, what a cliche he had become.
24) The Rose Of Whitechapel | Mature | 100,180 words
Jack the Ripper AU. Detective Constable Harry Styles and his partner, DC Liam Payne, lead the case on the Whitechapel murders. Louis Tomlinson, the Rose of Whitechapel, is harbouring secrets of his own, along with a dark and sordid past. When their paths cross, truths are revealed, and perhaps hearts are mended... A darkness is brewing, and it's finally come to collect on the promise it was made.
25) Our Endless Numbered Days | Explicit | 120,815 words
“Harry?” whispered Louis, his mouth dry, his nose pressing against the other’s warm skin. “Mh?” Harry’s humming was gentle, his fingers lightly caressing the younger boy’s arm, his chest steadily rising and falling beneath Louis’ cheek. A couple of seconds passed, and Louis looked up at him in the darkness of the cave, barely able to make out the expression on his face. When he tried to inhale deeply, his breath hitched. He struggled to find the words to tell Harry what he was thinking about. Another couple of seconds passed, and Louis listened to the reassuring beating of the prince’s heart beneath his cheek. He couldn’t. “Nothing,” he whispered, his voice weak. I think you’re half of my soul.
Check out our other fic rec lists by category here and by title here.
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panelshowsource · 10 months
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hi, sarah! i see you've watched a lot of british panel shows/comedians and i need a specific recommendation: where to start with dara o briain? he's right now my favourite taskmaster contestant ever and after listening to his episodes on the tm podcast and off menu, and watching him on wilty, i'm completely in love with his humor and manner of speech. what are the "must see" things he's done in the past? he's such a prominent figure in british tv but idk how to choose what to watch next
i have watched a lot of panel shows...you got that right hehehe...
i'm happy for you that you found someone you really like and get to explore a lot of new content! i gotta say, that doesn't happen often for someone quite so famous and prolific like dara, so it's fun for me to think back to all the stuff he's been in :')
he's a comedian, but he's also known for being mr big smarty pants, so he's done a lot of comedy programmes as well as smarty pants programmes & documentaries. you may choose to start in one of these distinct directions if there's a side of dara you like best! let me start with a few of my own faves...
he's probably best known — definitely by my followers, but also in general — for being the long-time host of the news-focused panel show mock the week, which JUST ended after 17 years. of the panel shows about news, of which there are many, this one is the most accessible and the most silly. dara is a GREAT host and has hilarious dynamics with the regular panelists, especially his literal best friend ed byrne (who we heavily stan). in fact, on mtw, you'll also see lots of other taskmaster contestants you may recognise, including panel captain and cult fave hugh dennis, frankie boyle, russell howard, and ed gamble. i know 17 years is A LOT, so if you've never seen the show and aren't sure where to start, i'm gonna recommend you give series 15 a go — as a new-er panel show fan, i think a more recent season like this one will be most accessible. also, this compilation of comedians roasting dara on mtw for half an hour is fucking hilarious lmaooo
dara has been on tons of panel shows as a panelist opposed to hosting, and you'd be amiss not to catch up on him on qi! one of stephen's smart lil boys and a clever laugh, he was made for that show. you can find dara's episodes here and i have all of qi linked on the masterpost! if you've never seen qi here's a silly clip that is mostly sean being one of stephen's naughty lil boys but it's a great example of the learning a lot/learning absolutely nothing dichotomy that can happen with a great panel (including dara!!)!
apart from that, i'd highly recommend you watch his stand-up! i put two specials on drive for you, 2012's craic dealer and 2015's crowd tickler (sorry for the mid quality — they're just dvd rips). these are pretty perfect for blossoming dara fans because they're funny, witty, clever, goofy — all the things we love about dara at once!!
as for my final personal recommendation, you should definitely check out dara & ed's great big adventure, a bbc two miniseries where the besties travel along the pan-american highway! they have top-tier wholesome bantz, ed is very fucking goofy (you will find quickly that being a fan of dara is being a fan of ed hahaha), and they explore some very beautiful cultures. i will work on getting decent rips of the show for my drive, but in the meantime you can watch this on dailymotion!
it would be amiss if i ended the recs here, because dara has hosted a lot of different series — but these series are based around very specific interests of his. some of the big ones include the following: go 8 bit, one of his most recent shows about classic and indie video games, very nostalgic with fun guests; science club (if you need full eps of this lmk, i should be able to get them but it will just take a lil time) and school of hard sums, nerds talking about science and maths, def have qi vibes; and the underrated stargazing live, broadcast every winter and when dr brian cox & our fave amateur astronomer mr ó briain talk about stars and shit! these are less necessary watching and more worth watching if the topics tickle your fancies~
okay i hope that helps!! there is obviously so much more to his career — including his many books — but i think this is overwhelming enough and i hope you don't mind the long post! feel free to catch us up on what you're enjoying down the line, we love dara and hearing what others love about him too :')
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alpinefrsh · 9 months
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Tommy in LMK crossover ideas
Ahem... Below the cut, you'll find yourself faced with eight different concepts for Tommyinnit in the universe of Lego Monkie Kid. Most of which I'd like to write something for in the future, but honestly, who knows if I'll actually get around to it. If any of these happen to be up your alley, feel free to take as much or as little inspiration from them as you'd like.
1 - Amnesiac c!Tommy: c!Tommy wakes up in a city (Megapolis) with no memories aside from the innate knowledge that his name is Tommy. Lives in a cardboard box he named L’Boxberg for no apparent reason until he befriends Bai He, who, upon figuring out that he’s homeless, drags him to Macaque’s place and doesn’t accept criticism. Tommy occasionally gets fucked up by things triggering his memories from dsmp. Sometimes they’re positive memories, but mostly they’re just traumatic and upsetting.
2 - Fae!Macaque and village child TommyInnit: Tommy, MK, Mei, and possibly Bai He are all children in a rural village on the outskirts of a forest. Whenever there’s no one else around to snitch, MK tells Tommy and Mei (and Bai He, depending on if she’s there or not) about the Fae who’s been teaching him magic (Monkey King). This is great, except it fills Tommy’s head with all the wrong kinds of ideas and he decides to venture out into the forest to meet the Monkey King for himself. Spoiler alert, the fae he encounters is not Monkey King (Tommy’s persistence earns him a fae older brother/father figure out of Macaque anyway).
3 - Ghost!Macaque and Tommy: Tommy moves out into a shitty cheap flat all on his own, only to discover it’s already occupied by a pessimistic ghost named Macaque. Also, he doesn’t believe in ghosts.
4 - Vigilante Tommy, Villain Macaque: SBI is family, all of them, excluding Tommy (who’s too young) are heroes. When a villain called Macaque hurts Wilbur badly enough to put him in a coma, Tommy becomes a vigilante for the sole purpose of getting revenge by putting Macaque behind bars.
5 - Raccoonification Station: In a classic case of ‘wrong place, wrong time’ Tommy gets hit by a mystic artifact Jin and Yin were messing with that turns him into a Raccoon. Now stuck as a raccoon with no idea of how to change back and no way of asking for help, Tommy befriends the first person who feeds him- presumably Bai He, but could hypothetically work as someone else- who eventually realizes that- one, there shouldn’t be any raccoons in China, and two, this raccoon does not act like a raccoon. And then brings him to Macaque (or Wukong, depending on who it is) to see if there’s any mystic shenanigans going on.
6 - Tommy and MK roommates AU: Everything is the same, except Tommy is MK’s roommate. Ongoing joke of one of them hitting the other with “We need to have a serious discussion” and then that ‘discussion’ being things like “MK, you have to stop facing your Monkey King toy in my direction. He stares at me all day long and I am beginning to fear for my life.” (Until of course Tommy gets sick of watching MK’s mental health collapse and has a genuinely serious discussion with his roomie) 7 - Sorry!Tommy in LMK: After being buried alive by the people he thought were his friends, Tommy digs his way back to the surface with a new fear of tight spaces. Except now Tommy finds himself on a mountainous island in the middle of an ocean (Flower Fruit Mountain). He befriends a local troop of monkeys and Wukong is entirely unaware of the random human living on his mountain until he overhears some monkeys chatting about the weird boy who came from the earth.
8 - Noodle Thief AU: Tommy’s part human, part raccoon demon, and a literal child, who lives in the bushes of a local park. One day he smells something particularly tasty and follows the scent to an unguarded vehicle with several containers of noodles. This starts a cycle that will take several years off of Pigsy’s lifespan in which Tommy makes a habit of stealing noodles whenever MK’s not looking. Post season 4 special.
These are all fairly slimmed down to the bare bones premises, so if you'd like more elaboration or plot details for any of these ideas, let me know. (I also have a written scene for both the Ghostcaque AU and the Vigilante & Villain AU if anyone wants to see either of those)
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damnhitsuzen · 1 month
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New chapter!
Different Directions - Chapter 8: Excuse
DUM DUM DUUUUM The penny has dropped, next chapter will have something totally different. And may have some answer? maybe? >:)
I considered expanding here on the theory I mentioned in the description, but decided to put it off till the next chapter. This one took longer and happened to be bigger than I expected, so it had me completely drained. In midst of it, Himawari appeared and saved me from terrible lack of progression for Watanuki's emotional labours. That's how I could, with the help of epigraph, wrap up the theme of this chapter, which is "a wedding" somehow? I know, I was shocked myself. Doumeki is so hard to write, dude never speaks any emotion. My theory that he was brought up in this very shut, emotionally restricted manner. We see a tiny bit of his mother - she is nice, but kinda... politely distant? And growing in such a traditional home I think that he just never saw enough examples of how to deal with emotions. How to express them. Perhaps that is why he immediately fascinated with Watanuki - hot mess, shouting his feelings on the top of his lungs not giving flying fucks about his surroundings. And I do think his ideas of noble servitude to the person he loves will get in the way of actual relationship. After all, in the original story we are so blindsided by Watanuki's self-sacrifices, we may miss that only Watanuki has learned his lessons and changed. BTW, the only viable thing in the whole eggs mystery I see is the metaphor they present. Watanuki finds a way around inevitable doom (helping with Himawari curse or taking half of the Tsubasa-kun's price so nobody has to die); and nothing will come out of Doumeki's egg, if he won't make a choice himself. He doesn't.
And yes, writing about sad, angry boys who love other boys, I did include a Placebo song. Duh.
For this chapter you will need Omake 4. Excited for the Birthday Party. For some fucked up reason, no one mentions there it's Sakura's birthday too. Watanuki is pouty little shit. Syaoron is dating someone (???) and Kurogane shows that fact more attention than Fai (??). Wild, right? Like all this over the top cheerful story crumbles on itself, right?
Finally, love to all my readers! your feedback makes me feel alive, I thrive from every kudo and every comment leaves me in tears. So please, leave them both here.
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firsttarotreader · 11 months
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For the cards, how does Pedro flirt with men and with women? Is there a difference in his flirting strategies?
Hello! I know I have done one about flirting, but didn’t specify genders, so it will be interesting to write this one. Again, I know these aren’t the only two genders, I am just sticking to the anon’s ask. Let’s start with the men, shall we?? 🤭 The first pull for his potential flirting style with men was the Queen of Teacups, Knight of Teacups and 7 of Flowers.
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So, he might start being like the Queen of Teacups, very lovely, caring, worried about being the nicest he can, the same with the Knight of Teacups, very charming, a gentleman, he will probably want to talk about acting, about movies, theatre, his creative side. However, 7 of Flowers is curious in a sense that he will somehow end up feeling the guy like some sort of rival, part of him could try to be a little bit of a show off because he could feel secretly threatened, afraid that the guy would be “better” than him in any way.
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The second pull was the Knight of Spears, The Hermit and 2 of Swords. Knight of Spears shows us, again, he will see the guy somewhat like a rival, someone he needs to best, to conquer, and he will “fight” to get him. The Hermit, on the other hand, means he could retreat to himself too, play hot and cold, come in strong and then back down, and 2 of Spears just confirms the confusion. He might give mixed signals, should I stay or should I go style, being insecure and uncertain, as usual.
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Now for the women, the first pull was the 6 or Flowers, 8 of Flowers and Page of Flowers. You know, like with the men, he starts well, 6 of Flowers telling us he will come in hot and strong, even feeling kind of confident, very passionate in his approach. 8 of Flowers means he’s not gonna waste any time. He might be more direct and fast in his flirting, again very passionate. Page of Flowers is more passion, but also when he wants to flirt with a woman, he might feel like an overwhelmed boy. The one that would go “😍😍😍” like he does in some chick’s posts (not that he is necessarily flirting when he posts that lmao). A boy who wants to explore all the wonders of that woman’s body and heart. 🤣🤣
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The second pull was the Page of Spears, Suspension and Strength. Page of Spears means that insecurity might also be creeping in, he really wants to impress her, he really wants to do it all right, but he might stumble a bit due to that uncertainty and possibly make mistakes, but dedicated, he will try to right his wrongs and please her. Suspension is more hesitation and insecurity in a sense that he could be scared to fuck it up and back down (like with the men) after coming in strong. Strength points to him trying hard to keep his shit together while flirting, he might feel the need to breathe and think of the situation as… conquering, dominating someone, “convincing” her in a way.
You know what we can gather from these two different approaches to these two genders? Aries being impulsive and Capricorn holding him back. The man always seems so insecure and feeling like he can’t pull them off. The men are his rivals, the women are too good for him and he is too much in awe of them to believe he can get them. I even asked if he feels insecure when he flirts with both and pulled one card for each. The women got me a 10 of Teacups reversed. Lol
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He really feels like he can’t get that “happy ending”, like it’s not gonna work and the woman will say “no”. The men got me the 3 of Teacups. Let’s say he could believe he has more chances with the men because he might let out his funny side more easily (not that he doesn’t with women) but he could also feel like the men wouldn’t take him seriously and would want him just as a friend or someone to have fun with.
So yeah, the man is very possibly insecure in his flirting.
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andyisbleeding · 1 year
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Zombie Undertaker x Reader
Chapter 1. The Power
The back of the house in most arenas is a labyrinth of gray halls with gray floors and no windows. You'll find yourself walking in circles and still not getting anywhere new. Some passing doors had small name plates, mostly offices and janitorial closets. No help to you, of course. The show is somewhere different every night so there's no use trying to remember the floor plan of the arena. By the time the tour comes back around, you'll have been to 200 other stadiums in 200 other cities, an exhausting but exciting whirlwind of work.
You've been on tour for 6 months now. Finally having a handle on the day to day duties, you've almost been able to overcome the lack of sleep schedule with the help of daily energy drinks and sitting up naps in quiet corners. Friends were easily made, both crew and wrestlers know these are the only people you'll get to see for months at a time. This is your new family, you feel welcome. As long as you pull your weight and aren't a raging asshole, everyone gets along surprising well.
Of course people have their cliques and squabbles. Some fights do break out but most are warranted and broken up quickly by the rest of the boys. People make up pretty quickly, knowing that you can't get away from each other is the best way to snuff out that flame.
You continue to wander down the cement hallway, hoping that a sign or person comes along soon. It feels like you've walked the whole arena by now, 'how the fuck do you get back to the locker rooms?'
Stepping out to smoke a joint with the lighting crew seemed like a good idea at the time. The door locking loudly behind you was when you all realized you'd made a mistake.
"Who doesn't put a wedge in the door Dave!" The group tears into the rail thin man. "What is your first day?" "Narc!" "Fuck you Dave." You all erupt in laughter, slapping the man on the back.
You hear soft footsteps coming quickly towards you. The hallway finally coming to an end with only a right hand turn for a direction.
You turn the corner and come face to face, or perhaps belly to belly with Paul Bearer himself.
You stopped quickly to not run smack into the stout man and tried to side step out of his way. Two beady eyes scanned you up and down and made a snap decision. He arched his dark eyebrows at you and twisted his face into an all knowing smirk. "Lost your way little sparrow?"
You swallow hard and force a polite smile onto your face. No need to make an enemy of Paul Bearer, keeper and manager of The Undertaker. "Yes sir actually. Would you mind pointing me in the right direction?" You hold your breath.
Paul cocks his head ever so slightly. Taking in your request and rolling it around in his round head. He smooths out his mustache while he decides if he's going to answer. He looks you up and down again. You don't shy away from his gaze, making sure your eyes meet his when he studies your face. His face twists up again into an approving grin, he gestures behind him.
"Back the way I came," Paul said softly. "Two rights and you'll be back where you belong, little bird." He turned on his heel and went on his way. For a chubby guy, he was very light on his feet, you remarked to yourself. It must come with being a funeral director.
"Thank you!" You call after him. He doesn't seem to hear you or chooses not to respond, either way the encounter went well and you're no longer lost.
Paul's word was good, and in a matter of minutes you walk into the staging area. Stage hands and wrestlers lingering around monitors and craft service tables. A large digital clock blinked the time over head. 8:30 PM. The show had essentially just started. You'd be willing to bet that someone was probably still monologuing in the ring and the first fight hadn't even started yet.
You don't have much of a job during the show. You help with set up and tear down and occasionally help out the art department when they have an extra large job. Tonight was going to be a pretty quiet night. Maybe you'll find yourself a dark locker room and get a much deserved nap.
You decide to check the title card just to recheck the roster. You enjoy watching the fights but the chance to catch up on sleep is far and few between. Nothing pops out at you from the schedule so you wander back towards the locker rooms. People were scattered through the halls, leaning, laughing, talking business. A little bit of everything gets talked about when you spend 24/7 with the same group of people. No topic is off limits and no shame is known.
You walk past the bigger locker rooms. That's where people really congregate, mostly the wrestlers and managers but definitely no peace or quiet. A few of the guys have their own dressing rooms, those are labeled and almost always occupied and locked. You step up to the first door with no name tag. You knock softly as you twist the handle and crack the door. "Hello?" No response. You push open the door wide and glance around the room. Empty minus a loveseat and a small coffee table. No bags, no people, perfect.
You're tempted to lock the door but know that could end poorly. If someone comes looking, you need to actually be findable. You curl up on the love seat, facing the open room and cover up yourself with the flannel you had around your waist. You're a pretty light sleeper so when the taping ends and people get rowdy, you'll be up and ready for tear down. The love seat was lumpy and smelled like stale cigarettes but your eyes were heavy as soon as you were horizontal. You drifted away to the far away sounds of the WWF.
********
You shiver awake.
The whole room was freezing and foggy. You're surprised you can't see your breath as you sigh and bring your flannel tighter around you. 'Why is it so cold in here?' You think to yourself. You slowly bring your wrist to your face. The room is too dark and your eyes are still adjusting to being open again. Trying to read your watch was impossible. Your legs bump up against the coffee table as you put yourself upright. That's odd. The table wasn't that close when you laid down.
You feel his gaze before your eyes fully adjust to the dark room. Truly only lit by the hallway light coming through the thin door window, the corners of the room are pitch black. You look into the darkness in the far corner and it stares back at you. Silent and cold. Two piercing green eyes stare at you through a curtain of wet curly hair.
What little warmth you had left exited your body. A gasp escaped your lips as you realized who was standing in the shadows. There wasn't a name on the door. You're sure of it. No bags. Everyone had language, even him. There were no bags when you started your nap. No inkling of habitation. The room was too small to have overlooked anything.
The Undertaker took a stiff slow step towards you. His large frame, now outlined by the small strip of light coming through the door.
You stand up suddenly. Your legs are cold and numb but you've realized your mistake and now need a swift exit. "I'm so sorry Undertaker. I didn't know this was your room. There wasn't a name on the door." Your voice sounded small and far away. You clear your throat. "Sorry again. Let me get out of your way."
The Undertaker took another step forward. He hasn't blinked. You realize he's a full foot taller than you, maybe even more. You notice how sore your neck is from your little nap as you look up at him. He's still in his wrestling gear. Was he waiting for you to leave to change? Why hadn't he woken you up and kicked you out? Paul Bearer. Paul Bearer was the doer. He controlled The Undertaker, or at least claimed to. But Paul was absent. Maybe he sent Undertaker to the locker room on his own.
You've been frozen to the spot ever since you stood up. All the thoughts running through your head distracted you and he had stepped towards you again. Now you're face to chest with the Undertaker. His neck craned downward towards you, the never ending stare still taking you in. He smelled like wet earth after a fall rain. You couldn't hear him breathe. You couldn't feel any body heat coming off of him. You wondered if his skin would be cold to the touch.
Your hand twitches. Why do you want to touch him so badly? You picture touching his bare chest and then sliding down his stomach. Your face is red and warm now with embarrassment, at least mostly. You remind yourself how you remarked on how handsome he was when you saw your first fight as crew. His red beard covered a square jawline, constantly clenched and almost never moving. His sad green eyes had lost their light sometime long ago. Maybe back when he was alive.
He must have seen your hand twitch, or maybe he saw your face suddenly turn red in the freezing room. A purple gloved hand slowly made its way towards your bare forearm. You don't shy away as the cool leather touches your skin. His fingers wrap around your wrist, tightening slowly like a constricting snake. You tilt your head back to look into the Deadman's eyes. His expression hasn't changed but his gaze moved away from your face and onto your wrist and his own hand. He was holding you tightly but it didn't hurt. You're not sure if you could pull away even if you wanted to. He was the strongest man in the WWF and you'd seen him take apart people 3 times your size.
His eyes snap back to yours.
His stare is too intense, so you drop your gaze to his pale lips. They look soft and you wonder how they'd feel against yours. How they'd feel against your neck and then your chest and you suddenly realize your panties are wet. Your face burns even warmer in the cold room, a beacon in the darkness. You pray he can't read minds, he is supernatural after all. Being dead seems to come with a few good perks so why not telepathy? You find yourself wanting to lean against his huge frame. You want your lips against his and his hands on more of you than just your wrist. You look back into his eyes, trying to tell him everything you were thinking in just a look. You could kiss him if you go on your tiptoes, you think. You look at his lips again. Neither of you have moved since he grabbed your wrist.
Unsure where you found the courage or maybe the audacity but you couldn't stop yourself. You make yourself as tall as possible and put your lips against his. His lips are cool but not cold and surprisingly soft. His ginger beard scratched against your chin. He hasn't moved. You realized you closed your eyes as your lips met. Do you dare open your eyes? Could you take the emerald stare and rage probably growing on the Undertaker's face? No. You really couldn't. You feel stupid. Having a crush. Kissing a man you've never had a conversation with let alone a dead one. You start to pull away and the grip on your wrist tightens.
Your eyes snap open in shock. You're met with his dark eyes closed and his face moving closer to yours. His lips are back against yours, the deadmans kiss was unsure. He seems to be taking your lead, he's out of practice perhaps. You press your body against his and lean into his kiss. He fells so good against you. You shift your mouth on his and your noses bump against each other. You're so wet you're worried about it showing through onto your jeans. You want him to touch you all over. You want him to kiss you all over, to tear your clothes off, to pin you against the wall and fuck you until you scream.
The Undertaker pulls away suddenly, returning to his full height and taking a large step away from you. Your wrist is hot where his tight grip was. Your body is vibrating. You snap back to reality as you realize he's no longer against you. You wonder why the abrupt halt and immediately find out why. The door opens swiftly, almost like it was kicked open. The light switch clicks on and you go momentarily blind.
"Taker, why are you in here? Your room is down the… hall…" Paul Bearer's voice fills the little room. High pitched and doating, his sentence slowly came to a stop. Your eyes were still adjusting but you could feel his puzzled stare on your red checked face. "What are you doing in here little bird?"
You decided the truth was the best answer, up to the kissing part anyway. "I came in here to take a nap during taping. There wasn't a name on the door. I woke up a few minutes ago and he was just… here." You gesture to the big man, still as a statue. "I was just leaving, I need to go start tear down."
Paul's face twisted around as he spoke. His chubby fingers tapped on the gold urn tucked in the crook of his arm. Paul looked from you to the Undertaker and then back to you. He glanced at his watch dramatically and let out a sigh. "You still have a half hour until you tear down. You stay here little sparrow. Taker and I will find our way to OUR locker room." The stout man gestured at the Undertaker to follow him and then swiftly turned on his heel and retreated from the room.
The Undertaker's eyes cut into you once more. You look up to meet his gaze, holding it for a moment. You swear you can see a twinge of red on his lips, warmth transferred from yours. His right arm crossed over and straightened the glove on his left hand. The hand that had held you tightly, the glove being the only thing between your skin and his. His stare dropped to your lips until he turned to follow Paul. To follow the gold urn. To follow the power.
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fillyoursoulxx · 1 year
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louis beaumont || bio pt. 1
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❂ Louis Isaiah Beaumont was born Dec 2nd, 21 years ago in Washington DC. It was early morning, 3:33am to be exact and he’s always held that as sort of a ‘lucky’ time/number for him.
❂ He was the third born to Damian and Miriam Beaumont and the only boy. They’d been trying and failing for a few years to have a child and longer for a boy. To his mother, he was her precious rainbow baby and to his father, he was his heir.
❂ Standards for Louis were…different. With 8 and 13 years between him and each of his siblings, he was close to them, but he wasn’t often treated as the kid he was. His father had him very regimented, starting early with piano, athletics and language lessons. His mother didn’t object, but at the same time, she tended to give in to him on a regular basis. So it was a lot of whiplash for him on what was ‘really’ expected.
❂ His solace was found in his Uncle Elijah. When their parents were too busy, which was often, Eli took charge of the kids and let them– be kids. Sure he had them doing some of the stuff his parents expected, but he wasn’t nearly as rigid and he helped put things into perspective as Louis grew up on ‘why’ his parents wanted him to be as well rounded as possible. In the end, he realized so much was out of love even if fear and ego were there at times too.
❂ But as a kid, uncle Eli was king for Louis. Louis was always going a mile a minute. Always jabbering on, always into something. If something was broken, you could expect it to be him. Spills. Destruction. Curiosity. You couldn’t leave him alone without him finding something to get into. Which conflicted with the type of ‘kid’ his father was trying to mold. His sisters tried to shield him a bit, but even as a toddler, he experienced a lot of ‘discipline’ due to his energy and lack of impulse control.
❂ At that age, he didn’t really notice. He kept going, never letting spankings, time outs or loss of privileges effect him, nearly oblivious to what was happening in those moments till he got older. He just– went back at it. It wasn’t until he hit school age that it really began to click, oh ok. I shouldn’t do these things. And yet, a lot he couldn’t help. At home or at school, he was a fucking tornado of energy.
❂ He had…alot. In this search to just keep him busy and out of trouble, Louis fucking struggled. He loved his family. His memories with Max and Dallas and Eli are some of his favorites. But it felt like a struggle with his parents. Nothing was ever good enough even when it was ‘good’. He felt the perpetual fuck up. Constantly trying and failing to ever truly get their approval on anything. It was to push him, to make him great. He knew that because he did have softer moments with them. His mother was there when he truly needed it, providing the kind of softness she knew how. And his father, while often absent, followed his games, kept his stories, and did show up when he could even if it often ended in a fight. But it was…stressful.
❂ But where he lacked impulse control, Louis made up in kindness. He always the first to volunteer to help, whether it involved the teacher or another student. He’d give away his lunch money to someone he thought needed it or sit with the kids that seemed alone, talking their heads off about the latest thing he saw on late night tv.
❂ He was the kind of kid you dreaded and loved all at once and if you ask him, he’ll tell you his childhood was a wonderful thing even with all of the bad feelings, the good are what he focuses on.
❂ While mainly stationed in DC, they moved around a bit when he was elementary age. He liked being the new kid, always getting a chance to make new friends and have new ‘expectations’ from those around him. Though it always got to the same point. School was a process for Louis, who multiple teachers recommended that he take some form of medication for his outbursts and inability to follow directions without being distracted or derailing the entire class. Packing his schedule seemed to help some. Those sports, languages, music. Anything and everything was tried to keep him from idling.
❂ It was a lot. The pressure. He didn’t have a proper outlet and he had his first real panic attack at 9. His father didn’t want him to be stigmatized. Medication wasn’t an option. So he did what he could. Though movies proved to help in his lower moments. Movies, tv, anime. All escapes that for two hours he didn’t have to think about anything else. He began writing his own stuff and that helped too.
ADOLESCENCE;
❂ As he hit his preteen years, Louis began to play sports more seriously. He was coordinated, good at most physical things only after a few tries even if he couldn’t always focus. Soccer was his first poison of choice and he was good.They settled back in DC a bit around the time he turned 15 and he joined a team but some of the other kids found him to be odd. There were always jokes made about how he spent more time talking about japanese cartoons, comics and superheroes than he did the sport or the usual topics. Small, he was picked at, but Louis? He never really noticed. He was the butt end of jokes, but always the first to laugh. He was confident, even then, that the things his ‘friends’ did were often in good fun and never to take advantage of him or be malicious. Even when his trips to the principal's office became more frequent and his detentions began to pile up, he insisted things were fine. He was loyal and they just had different ways of showing their friendship to him.
❂ It was during that time things really began to sour from him. His uncle Eli had been struggling without the families knowledge. He began embezzling to stay afloat and other unsavory things that got him in a shit ton of trouble. He went to jail and Louis started to spiral a bit. He kept it cool. For the most part. He had that standard to live up to, but at the same time? He was being to buck it. Also anxiety inducing. The stress helped his mother realize he needed help. Therapy. Meds. He started both without his father’s knowledge.
❂ He was sixteen when a new kid moved to town and his friends turned their attention to him. Louis thought they were looking to welcome him into the fold, he was a bit quiet, always reading, kinda awkward, but the more time they spent with him, the more Louis started to notice the shit way they were treating him. The jokes they had used on Louis, they were funny to him, but this kid? Not so much. It didn’t take long before he began to see their relationship with this kid and their relationship with him? They weren’t harmless and in one very explosive day, Louis not only stood up for the kid, but broke his best friend’s jaw.
❂ He was ousted from the soccer team. Fine. He needed new friends. Fine. He had one and that was fine with him. He took it all in stride. Stayed confident and though he had a nasty mark on his record, his parents were actually kinda proud he finally stood up for himself and someone else. In the end, his dad was able to make it go away, but still. It felt kinda good. But at the same time, increased the pressure from his father to pick the right friends and be that person he wanted him to be.
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randynova · 3 years
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♡𝓜𝔂 𝓦𝓸𝓶𝓪𝓷♡
𝓖𝓾𝓷 𝔁 𝓡𝓮𝓪𝓭𝓮𝓻
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𝑆𝑢𝑚𝑚𝑎𝑟𝑦: 𝐴𝑙𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑑𝑦 𝑠ℎ𝑜𝑟𝑡 𝑜𝑛 𝑡𝑖𝑚𝑒, 𝐺𝑢𝑛 𝑖𝑠 𝑓𝑜𝑟𝑐𝑒𝑑 𝑡𝑜 𝑓𝑖𝑔ℎ𝑡 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑟𝑒𝑣𝑒𝑎𝑙 𝑡𝑜 𝐺𝑜𝑜 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑠𝑜𝑛 ℎ𝑒 𝑠𝑡𝑎𝑦𝑠 𝑤𝑖𝑡ℎ 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑖𝑓 𝑖𝑡 𝑚𝑒𝑎𝑛𝑠 ℎ𝑒 ℎ𝑎𝑠 𝑎𝑛𝑦 𝑤𝑎𝑦 𝑜𝑓 𝑚𝑎𝑘𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑖𝑡 𝑡𝑜 𝑦𝑜𝑢𝑟 𝑑𝑎𝑡𝑒 𝑜𝑛 𝑡𝑖𝑚𝑒.
✦✦✦ ✦✦✦
𝑊𝑎𝑟𝑛𝑖𝑛𝑔(𝑠):𝐹𝑒𝑚!𝑅𝑒𝑎𝑑𝑒𝑟, 𝐹𝑙𝑢𝑓𝑓, 𝑠𝑜𝑓𝑡(𝑠𝑖𝑚𝑝)! 𝐺𝑢𝑛
✦✦✦ ✦✦✦
“Why couldn’t this have waited until another day?” Gun muttered, unbuttoning his shirt, letting it slide off his taut frame, and neatly folding it, placing it onto the roof of his car. He was glad he hadn't put his jacket on, having left it in his passenger seat. “I can’t dirty my clothes again, [Name] will be mad if I get blood on it.” He rolled his broad shoulders until they released a satisfying crack, his thick muscles bulging as he stretched his arms across his scarred chest. Gun peered at a nearby store, the digital clock displaying in big white numbers, ‘7:45 PM’. He groaned, his lips curling into a scowl whilst his arms fell to his side. He didn’t have enough time to deal with this.
“Hmm, and it’s almost time for our date. Fuck.” Gun whispered to himself. He clenched his fists, narrowing his eyes at the man across from him. He removed his shades and revealed his dark gaze, placing his favorite accessory to his side as well. “I’ll make this quick, Goo. I have more important places to be.”
Goo laughed, grinning in his spot as he balanced a pole in his hands. He rolled his eyes, arching a brow at his partner. “Tsk, tsk, tsk, Gun, maybe if you didn’t spend all your time by [Name]’s side, we could have dealt with this matter much earlier. That girl has you wrapped around her pretty little finger, huh?”
“Shut it,” Gun said, already racing towards the blonde and thrusting his fist, knuckles colliding with metal. Upon the cold sensation meeting his skin, he wanted to absolutely kill Goo and rip him to shreds. This would take longer than he wanted, wasting his already precious, short time. He backed off, having a considerable distance between the two, stretching his fingers a few times before clenching them again. He growled, spitting venomously,  “You just like picking fights.” 
“You did too. Before you met her, y’know,” Goo tutted, waving his finger in the air. He scoffed, voice low, “Who would’ve thought? Gun going soft for a girl. Psh, pathetic. Never thought I’d live to see the day...” The blonde trailed off, his face becoming stoic, his mind wandering. You truly had to be someone exceptional if you managed to have a guy like Gun to fall for you. He always wondered who you were, how you looked like, what you did, but Gun had kept you a secret from the world of crime. He hid almost every known trace abou you and tied every loose end that implicated you existed. No one knew who you were and no one could find you — unless Gun allowed them to. 
Goo found it so irritating how he was unable to know the girl who made such a notorious gangster go soft. 
He only met you once and that was by pure sheer luck; dropping by unexpectedly at one of Gun's apartments, only to be met with the sight of you. Seeing how Gun reacted, he knew you were supposed to be kept hush-hush. But boy, did he have a field day the next time he saw the man.
Goo had to meet you again. Or at least, know you more.
Only when Gun’s fist connected with Goo’s face did the man snap out of his thoughts, the impact of such force throwing him a few feet backwards. He dug his feet into the floor, a high-pitched screech coming from his shoes as the rubber burned against the pavement. With his sleeve, Goo wiped his cheek, seeing a speck of blood staining his clothes. Goo chuckled, standing up straight with a grin, “If I can remember right, you told me you got Eli Jang in trouble for basically the same thing. What was her name again? Heather?”
Goo blocked the upcoming attack, his pole raised and crossed above his face. He pushed Gun back with an effortless swing of the pole. He tilted his head and scratched the back of his head with his free hand. “How is [Name] any different from Heather? What does she have on you?”
Gun twisted his neck gently until he heard a crack, looking back at Goo as he hissed with venom, “Nothing.”
“Let me think, let me think….” Goo hummed, racking his mind for any possibility that someone like Gun would stay with a woman longer than one night. His face lit up and he broke out into a wide grin, pointing a finger at Gun. “Aha! You got the poor girl knocked up, right?! See, I always tell you to wear protection! Just couldn’t keep it in your pants, hm? Shaaame.” 
“Ugh, fuck no. I don’t want kids and neither does she. We made that clear at the beginning," Gun said with a sneer, annoyed beyond comprehension at Goo's antics. 
“Awe, I really thought she held something over you. How about this: I’ll stop fighting you if you tell me why you’re still with such a pretty girl like [Name]? Deal?" Goo offered, slinging the pole onto his shoulder. His eyes darkened as he spat maliciously, knowing each word would wind and rile Gun's emotions. "She deserves better than a perverted gangster, you both know that.”
Gun stayed silent, the corners of his lips tugging down into a frown. Goo’s last words struck a chord in him, sending a pang through his heart upon hearing an insecurity he’ll never admit to. Of course. Everyone told you to stay away from a man like Gun. People kept telling you you will only get hurt in the end, that a better man will come along and sweep you off your feet if you just waited, or you could always do better than him. But you never listened. You stayed by his side, even when the whole world looked down on you two. Even for months, he tried convincing himself he felt nothing for you, but after a while, he finally accepted that someone managed to tear down his walls and enter his hollow, cold heart — you. 
You were just a different kind of girl - no- a different kind of woman. A special woman he had the pleasure of meeting. One he wouldn’t dare let go of now that he has the privilege of calling you ‘mine’. And by any god out there, he won’t be a stupid fool to lose you.
Gun sighed. “I tell you and you’ll put this stupid fight behind us, right?”
Goo placed a hand over his chest, replying shortly, “You have my word.~”
“[Name] is just that special person you meet once in your life. One you know you can’t let go of because there isn’t another like her. Simple as that.”
“What?! Ugh, don’t be boring! Tell me more!”
“You asked why I  stayed with her and I told you.”
“Yeah, but I expected a story, not some sad attempt at an old man’s wise words.”
A low guttural sound rumbled in Gun’s throat, his eye twitching. “Maybe when I’m in a better mood I’ll tell you, but if you’ll excuse me, I have a date with my woman.”
Goo groaned and tossed his pole to the side, rolling his eyes and grumbling, "Fiiine, but you owe me a story. "
"Whatever—damnit," Gun looked at the clock once again and his face contorted into one of pure irate. "I'm late."
'8:12 PM'
✦✦✦ ✦✦✦
Your head rested on your hand, balancing a glass of wine between your fingers, twirling the cup as the liquid swished around. Your eyes were looking down on the glory of Gangdong, the shimmering, blinding lights of the city mesmerizing you. The city always looked beautiful at this time of night. You just wished you could enjoy it with the person you cherished. A sigh leaves your lips and you look away, eyes trailing to the other tables over the balcony. 
The lingering eyes of many strange men didn't faze you anymore, the two burly boys surrounding your table always making them avert their gaze as fast as it landed. A courtesy of your boyfriend, who was at least thirteen minutes late, who insisted on you needing to be guarded at all times. You knew if he were here, no one would dare to even breathe in your direction, let alone glance. 
The cool air pricked your skin and a shiver passed through your body, reminding you of where you were. For a man as smart as him, Gun tended to neglect keeping the season in mind when planning your dates. Nonetheless, you were happy he went out of his way to take you out on such a busy schedule. 
You jumped in your seat, snapping out of your thoughts. A jacket was wrapped around your frame, warmth immediately enveloping you as the fabric made contact with your bare skin. You looked up and smiled. 
Gun stood behind you, towering over your sitting form as he made sure you were nice and covered. His coat basically swallowed you whole. A small stuffed animal was tucked under his arm, it’s fluffy fur peeking out. He walked over to take his seat, pulling the chair out, and wasting no time to slip in. He waved to the guards and they nodded, beginning to clear the scene of people.
“Sorry I’m late, [Name],” Gun started, taking the stuffie out from underneath his arm and presenting it to you. Oh, how adorable. "I brought you a gift as an apology."
A small brown otter sat in his palms, barely taking up Gun's hands. It’s beady, plastic eyes looked straight at you, a little smile stitched onto its snout. A snort left you. The sight of such a well-dressed, intimidating man carrying such an adorable toy was  amusing. "Really now? Just a cute toy, Gun?"
Gun sighed and sat up a bit from his chair, leaning over the table, and cupping your face as he planted a gentle kiss on your cheek. As quick as it started, Gun's lips left and he was seated once again. You pout. "Don't give me that look, [Name]. We can do more at home if you want but not here."
"It's not wrong to be disappointed in no kiss on the mouth after not seeing your boyfriend for such a long time. Don't you think I deserve it?"
Gun smirked, placing his shades on the table and taking your hand, intertwining your fingers together. He gave a light squeeze and you didn't miss a beat as you squeezed his coarse hand back. The way you pursed your lips and looked at him with such glossy, innocent eyes made his heart swell. With such a pretty, cute face, it was hard to say no to you. "Hmm, maybe. But Olly told me you crossed paths with Hostel A." Gun spoke, slipping his hands from yours and picking up his dinnerware, quickly cutting the savory meat into pieces. He didn't hesitate to put a piece up to your mouth, a hand underneath so as to not have the juice leak. "I was told you nearly broke the Uncles' bones and Big Daddy himself."
Your face scrunched up and you scoffed, shaking your head. You placed the stuffed animal to the side, petting it. "Figured those assholes wouldn’t tell you everything. The ‘uncles’ wouldn’t leave me alone and I thought Olly was another one of those bastards,” you snap, sitting back in your seat with a scowl. “How was I supposed to know he was trying to help when he dresses like that? I thought he was trying to assault me for God’s sake!”
Gun placed down his fork on his plate and his face twisted into one of fury, eyes turning cold and rigid as all the warmth disappeared whilst his lips curled back into a nasty frown. You almost thought his infamous scowl was directed towards you, but you knew better. You dear boyfriend wouldn't dare lay a single finger on you if it didn't bring you pleasure. "They what?" 
You smiled softly, placing your hand over his as it clenched into a fist. With your small attempt at trying to soothe him by rubbing small circles, you spoke with a bit of hesitation, "Ah, yeah. They kept trying to get my number and wouldn't let me leave the booth I was in. I had no other choice than to use the training you taught me. Since I never met Olly, I really thought he was just another one of them and I reacted before thinking, making me attack him too."
Gun scoffed, shaking his head as he listened to your explanation with disbelief, every word fueling his rage of someone daring to hit on his woman. Every fiber in Gun's body screamed, wanting to feel their skin underneath his fists as he pounded them into oblivion. But the only thing stopping him was his date with you. For now, he'll put his anger aside to be with you and keep you happy. Who knows how long he'll be gone and when he'll see you again. The man has to make every second count. 
Yet, he couldn’t let this go unpunished.
"Fuck." Gun leans closer to you and sits on the edge of his chair. Placing his hand over yours, he slips his fingers to grasp your palm, and lifts your hand to his lips, pressing tender kisses against your knuckles. His thumb grazing softly across your fingers and his eyes flutter shut. You couldn't help but stare in awe, never quite seeing him like this.
So careful with you, so gentle, you were surprised he wasn't seething in his seat and threatening to break their heads open. Gun opens his eyes and looks up at you, shaking in his seat. “I promise I’ll have those fuckers begging on their knees for your forgiveness. They should know better than to treat a woman with such rudeness and disrespect. Shit, I’ll go right now. I’ll beat them till-”
Your sweet laugh reaches his ears, cutting him off from his little speech. You lean in and pull in his hand to your lips, pressing a tender peck to his coarse knuckles. Gun felt his heart race and skip a beat at the sight, shock crossing his features. You look up, looking at your boyfriend with mirthful eyes. “As much fun as that sounds, I'd rather you stay here. Please? I want to spend as much time with you before you go back to work.”
The man stayed silent for a few seconds, taking in your words. He looked away, clicking his tongue before he broke out into a small smile, a blush blooming across his cheeks and the tip of his ears burning a bright red. “Of course, [Name]. Though, you could’ve just said you like spending time with me.”
Giggling, you lower your hands and shake your head. “Gun, of course I like spending time with you. You’re my favorite person and I love you after all.” Your voice said those three words with such fondness, it’s as if the man was in a dream. 
If your words from before didn’t send Gun over the edge, your proclamation of love surely did now. He looked down, grinning like an idiot, showing a soft, bashful side he’s never revealed to anyone before. He swore his heart would jump out of his throat from how fast it was pounding against his ribcage. Gun grasped your hand tightly and sighed blissfully, Gently, he spoke, gazing at you with loving eyes, “I love you too.”
You smiled.
The tension in the air grew to be too much and both of you found it unbearable, wanting to do what both of you have been waiting for for weeks.
Both of you sat up and leaned over the table, closing the gap between you two as your lips interlocked, slipping together like if you were made for eachother. The kiss sparked and fed the fire both of you held in your hearts, burning brighter with every moment you spent at one another’s side. Gun couldn’t help but smile against your mouth.
As much as he hated being apart from you for so long, moments like these made the long hours worth it. If working so much meant he could provide for you, then he wouldn't mind doing it for the rest of his life if you had a roof over your head and a nice, warm meal at night.
Afterall, you were his woman.
And he loved you.
✦✦✦✦✦✦
©𝚛𝚊𝚗𝚍𝚢𝚗𝚘𝚟𝚊 || 𝚊𝚕𝚕 𝚛𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝𝚜 𝚛𝚎𝚜𝚎𝚛𝚟𝚎𝚍 || 𝚗𝚘 𝚝𝚛𝚊𝚗𝚜𝚕𝚊𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗𝚜, 𝚎𝚍𝚒𝚝𝚜, 𝚌𝚘𝚙𝚢𝚒𝚗𝚐, 𝚛𝚎𝚙𝚘𝚜𝚝𝚒𝚗𝚐, 𝚎𝚝𝚌. 𝚞𝚗𝚍𝚎𝚛 𝚊𝚗𝚢 𝚌𝚒𝚛𝚌𝚞𝚖𝚜𝚝𝚊𝚗𝚌𝚎𝚜 .
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americasass91 · 3 years
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The Shield and the Sweater
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Hello lovelies! This little fic came to me when the lovely, beautiful, talented @stargazingfangirl18​ asked a very important question on her blog. Would you rather be enemies to lovers with Steve Rogers or friends with benefits with Ransom Drysdale. Well my greedy ass wanted both. Thus the birth of this story. I also turned it around a little to make it fit into Siri’s 5k Soft Dark Challenge! I’ve never written anything dark before. Also not sure if this classifies as soft!dark or if it’s more dark. But it’s one of those! If that makes you uncomfortable, then please don’t read it. This is also my first time writing a threesome, so let me know if it sucks! I hope you enjoy it! 😘
General prompts:
8)The town golden boy isn’t as sweet as everyone thinks.
Dialogue prompts:
3)”Oh, honey, you weren’t supposed to see that.”
11)”I’ve waited a long time for this, sweetheart.”
Rating: Explicit(if you’re under 18, please leave)
Words: 6.2k(this one got away from me, sorry)
Warnings: soft!dark/dark themes, unprotected sex, anal sex, vaginal sex, threesome(M/M/F), manipulation, language, model!Ransom being an asshole, Steve not being who you think he is
“And I really think if everyone pitches in to make these changes, it’ll really make a difference in the long run.”
Wow, so this is how you were going to die. In your whole 20 something years of existence, you never thought boredom would be your cause of death.
Sure, you were the lead Accountant at Stark Tower and these monthly meetings were mandatory. But did you really have to be here to listen to Rogers go on and on about how we can ‘improve our working environment’? Why did he even care anyway? He was barely ever here as it is.
You must have been zoning out worse than you thought because next thing you know your coworker, Janet, is poking you in the side and pointing towards Steve.
With a quick glare sent her way, you move your gaze to the Captain. He is giving you the same look he always does. Like he’s disgusted with you. “I’m sorry Miss Y/L/N. Am I boring you?”
A scoff escapes your mouth. “No, not at all Captain Rogers. I just love when people who are never here seem to always have an opinion on how things are run and how they could be better.”
He narrows his eyes at you. “Do you have a problem with me, Y/N? Cause if you do, I’m sure there’s a way to solve that.”
You stand up and match his expression. You lean forward with your hands resting on the table. You can’t help but notice the Captain drops his gaze to your cleavage that’s now on more display than before. But just as quick as it was there, his gaze rises back up to meet your face. “Is that a threat, Captain Rogers?”
“Oh, it’s more than a-“
Tony quickly stands up and claps his hands together. “Okay! Meeting adjourned! You two, come here!”
You quickly straighten yourself up and make your way over to Tony. You always try to make sure you show him as much respect as you can. He’s your boss after all.
“I’m so sorry, Mr. Stark. My emotions got the better of me. It won’t happen again.”
He nods to you. “Thank you, Y/N. I accept your apology. But what I’m not understanding is why Steve here wanted to fire you?”
You both turn to look at Steve who has a sheepish expression on his face. “Yeah, sorry about that, Tony. She just seems to bring out this ugly side of me. I’ll try to keep it more contained next time.” He then moves his gaze to you. “Sorry, Y/N. I promise to be more professional moving forward.”
He makes a quick exit, leaving you shocked that he apologized at all. Ever since you started here almost a year ago now, you’ve been at each other’s throats. It was your fault really.
It was your first week and you were in the break room grabbing some coffee when you overheard a few of your coworkers making fun of Steve for being a virgin. Now, you weren’t sure if it was true but you wanted to fit in so you made your way over to the group and asked if anyone calls him Captain Virgin. That earned you some big laughs. But the laughter died down quickly as Steve entered the room to grab some coffee. Judging by the glare he gave you, he heard what you had called him.
You went straight to Tony after that to apologize. You really didn’t want to get fired. But you wanted to make sure Tony heard the story from you before Steve got the chance to talk to him. To your utter surprise, Tony found the name hilarious and gave you a high five, saying you were going to fit right in.
Well long story short, it’s almost a year later and Steve is still getting called Captain Virgin. Oh but don’t worry, he has names of his own for you. His favorite is Tony’s Pet. For some reason, it really eats at you when he calls you that.
But the one thing you hate the most about Steve?
Is how utterly, hopelessly, and desperately attracted you are to the son of a bitch.
That happened in your second week when you went to use the complimentary gym and saw him beating the shit out of some poor punching bag. Your panties and your workout were definitely ruined after that.
The more you fought with Steve, the more you just wanted him to bend you over any surface and have his way with you.  
It was despicable how horny you were for him. You were pretty sure all he’d have to do is snap his fingers and point to the floor in front of him and you’d happily drop to your knees and take him down your throat.
So that left you leaving work every day in a horny state. You started by taking care of it yourself when you got home. But after a while even that wasn’t cutting it. Then you started bringing home one night stands. But after the 4th disappointing non-orgasm, you gave up and just learned to live with it.
Sure, you could attempt to start being nice to Steve and maybe ask him out. But you were pretty sure he hated you. Plus you have way too much pride to actually do that.
So that leads to now. It’s Friday night and your workday is almost over. You’re inputting the last few numbers from the last expense report in your pile.
You get the last number put in when Janet approaches you. She sits on the corner of your desk. “So, you coming tonight?”
You take your glasses off and lean back in your chair, stretching your arms over your head. “Coming where?”
She rolls her eyes at you. “Oh, come on Y/N! You know we go out almost every Friday night. You never come and you always say you will!”
You start to clear off your desk and put things back in their place. “Yeah well I could. Or I could go home and sit on my ass and do nothing.”
“Well, that explains why it’s looking a bit bigger lately.”
Janet’s jaw drops as she directs her gaze at Steve, who is now standing in front of your desk.
You smirk and lean on your elbows towards him. “You like looking at my ass, Rogers?”
He scoffs. “Well when it takes up that much space, it’s hard not to notice. But here, I came to give you this.”
He hands you what looks to be a 10 page expense report. “Sorry it’s late, I’ve been busy, you know. Saving the world.”
You ungraciously take it from him and throw it in your to-do pile. “That can wait until Monday. I’ve got plans. We’re going to-” you look towards Janet for clarification. “Lavo.” You turn your gaze back to Steve. “Yeah, we’re going to Lavo. So this will wait til Monday if that’s okay with you, sir.”
Steve does his best to move his bag and jacket subtly towards the front of his pants so you won’t notice his growing hard-on. He hates how turned on he gets when you guys get into it. And then you call him sir? Jesus. He clears his throat. “Of course, I'm the one who turned it in at the last minute.”
Janet speaks up quickly. “You could always come with us! It’ll be fun!”
You grin widely at him. “Yeah! You could finally get your cherry popped, Captain Virgin.”
Steve can’t help the blush that covers his cheeks. “Uh, I can assure you my cherry has been popped since the 40’s. But thank you for your concern. And thank you for the invite, Janet. But i think I’ll stay in tonight.” He takes out his phone and sends a quick text before turning around and walking towards the elevators.
Wow. He didn’t even try to retaliate. You shrug your shoulders and grab your purse before standing up. “Alright, I’ll go! But on one condition!”
Janet claps her hands in excitement and starts walking with you towards the elevators. “Sure, anything!”
You press the button for the lobby. “You are going to be my wingwoman. Cause this girl definitely needs to get laid.”
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Lavo is super packed by the time you guys arrive. Of course you all had to go home and change.
You decided to go with a simple, yet effective, little black dress that showed off just enough to get men’s attention.
Thankfully you are able to score the last table. The waiter comes over and gets everyone’s drink order. You decide to stick with your favorite. You don’t want to get too drunk on the off chance you find someone to take home.
About a half hour into hot office gossip, Lucy, who is sitting across from you, taps your arm. You raise your eyebrows in question towards her.
She subtly nods her head towards the bar. “Okay I’m pretty sure the hottest guy I have ever seen is checking you out.”
You can’t help the smirk that crosses your face. “Yeah? Which one?”
“You can’t miss him. He’s fucking hot. Like no comparison to any of the other dudes sitting up there.”
You glance down at your drink and quickly finish the remainder. You stand up and adjust your dress, pushing up your breasts in the process. “Well, then I guess it’s time for a refill.” You wink and turn to make your way towards the bar.
It doesn’t take long for you to spot him. And boy was Lucy not kidding. He was fucking hot. Brown hair, blue eyes, and a smug smirk that would normally turn you off. But on him it worked. And who even looks that good in a fucking cream colored cable knit?
You go up to the bar, not too close to Mr. Hottie of course, and patiently wait for the bartender.
Hottie McHothot not so subtly moves his gaze up and down your body. He must like what he sees. “Hey honey, have you ever raised chickens?”
Uh. That’s definitely not the first thing you expected to come out of his mouth. You look over at him with confusion on your face. “Uh, no. Why do you ask?”
He just shrugs his shoulders. “Just kinda figured you might. Cause you sure can raise a cock.”
Okay, you’ve definitely never heard that line before. You crack up. You’re pretty sure you even snorted on accident. Once you collect yourself you ask, “Has that line ever worked for you?”
The bartender makes his way over to take your order. After reordering what you had before, you turn towards Hottie and wait for his answer.
“Not sure, my buddy told it to me yesterday so this is the first time I’m using it. Did it work?”
You shrug your shoulders. “I don’t know. It was pretty cheesy.”
“Yeah, maybe. But it got you to laugh. So I’d say mission accomplished. Name’s Ransom. What’s yours, pretty girl?” He holds out his hand for you to shake.
Ransom. Now where have you heard that name before? You accept his hand shake. You can’t help but notice how much bigger his hands are than yours. Jesus. You could already feel your panties getting wet.
“My name’s Y/N. Ransom, that sounds familiar. Do I know you?”
He releases your hand and goes to take a sip of his bourbon. “Well, I guess that depends. Do you read magazines or have you seen the side of the city bus lately?”
You quickly wrack your brain. You don’t read many magazines. But the bus drives by you everyday on your walk to work. Holy shit! That’s it! He’s in his underwear on the side of the bus. You’ve drooled over that picture plenty of times.
“Oh, yeah! I remember now! I’ve seen you on the bus! What’s it an ad for? I can never really get past the almost naked man. A bit distracting on my way to work.”
He smirks as he briefly glances down at your breasts. “I’m glad you know my work. It’s an ad for Calvin Klein. For their new line of men’s briefs. Sorry I’ve been a distraction.” He sends you a wink.
Fuck. He was a model. And a popular one at that if he’s in an ad for Calvin Klein.
“I didn’t say I minded. You can make it up to me you know.” You wink back. Holy shit. Were you really flirting with a model?
“Yeah? Well, how about we get out of here and I’ll show you a fully naked man.”
Okay. Cheesy line number 2. Was that really going to work on you?
Yes.
Yes it was.
“Let me just go grab my purse.”
Drink forgotten, you go back to your table as quickly as you can without looking desperate. “Sorry, girls. But this is where I leave you.”
Janet glances down at her phone. “We haven’t even been here an hour yet! Where are you going?”
You send her a wink. “I’m leaving with that guy! You guys know him! Remember that ad on the side of the bus?”
They all turn their gaze to him. And they all make it very obvious. He just waves and sends them a smirk.
“Holy fucking shit! That’s the new Calvin Klein guy! Oh my god you lucky bitch!”
“Wait! Listen. We’ll let you go on one condition.”
You furrow your brows in confusion. “Okay?”
Janet gives you a naughty smirk. “On Monday I’ll need a report on if they had to stuff his briefs to get that delicious looking bulge or not.”
You give her a naughty smirk of your own. “I can totally do that.”
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Monday morning you were all smiles as you stepped off the elevator and headed towards your desk. You give Janet a wink as you pass by her. She quickly makes her way over just as you sit down. “Um, excuse me hoe. But is that the same dress you were wearing Friday night?”
You quickly grab the cardigan you always keep in your desk out and put it on and button it up, attempting to look a little more professional. “Maybe.”
Janet opens her mouth in shock. “You stayed the whole weekend with him? You little slut! How was it?”
You turn on your computer and grab for the expense report of Steve’s you left in your to-do pile. Then you turn towards your nosy coworker. “Well, if you must know, yes. I did stay the whole weekend with him. And I’m pretty sure I was in an orgasm-induced coma the whole time. It’s all kind of a rough, sticky, mind-blowing blur.”
“Are you going to see him again?”
You shrug your shoulders as you put in your login information on the computer. “I haven’t decided yet. While the sex was the best I’ve ever had, he’s kind of an ass. Talked about himself and all the famous people he’s hooked up with since becoming a model. I honestly kept initiating sex just to make him shut up.”
She gives you a look like you’re stupid. “I’m not seeing the issue here. So what if he talks about himself a lot? The sex was amazing. You need to lock that down girl.”
You roll your eyes at her. “That’s the thing, Janet. He doesn’t do relationships. He told me so multiple times. Plus I’m pretty sure he was texting another chick in between our ‘sessions’. I suppose if I’m desperate, I’ll get a hold of him.”
“You know you could always just have him on backup for sex. Like a friends with benefits situation.”
“Janet, I’m in my late 20s. I’m too old for that kind of relationship.”
“Exactly, you’re in your late 20s! This is the perfect time for that kind of relationship before you settle down and get married! Have one last final hoorah!”
“I can’t have this conversation before caffeine. I’m going to get coffee. You act like I’m dying soon or something.” You turn to walk away but then remember you were supposed to tell her something. “Oh yeah and by the way. The bulge is definitely not stuffed.”
You give her a wink and then head to the break room for some much needed coffee. When you see who’s in there, you almost contemplate going downstairs to a different break room.
Steve is standing at the counter, preparing his coffee. He turns when he hears you come in and gives you a once over. “Well, look what the cat dragged in.”
You grab a mug out of the cabinet beside him. “Sorry my appearance isn’t up to your standards today, Rogers. I was a little...busy this weekend.”
He takes a sip of his coffee to make sure it’s right. Then he moves out of your way so you can get to the coffee, but still staying close. “Busy getting run over by a truck? Cause that’s kind of what you look like.”
You pour yourself a generous amount of coffee and take a long sip, letting the bitter liquid slowly make you human. “Yeah, well. I was busy getting fucked all weekend, Rogers. But I know your little innocent mind wouldn’t know what that’s like.”
That wipes the stupid little smirk right off his face. He almost looks pissed. He moves even closer to you. Almost pressing himself right up against you. So close that you can smell his coffee-scented breath. If you were wearing panties, they’d be ruined.
“Not all of us feel the need to sleep around. Some of us are looking for a real connection. Not just a one night stand of meaningless, mediocre sex.”
You press yourself just a little closer to him, his chest now touching yours. “Oh, it was anything but mediocre. Maybe if you actually got some, you’d know what that feels like.”
He leans his head down until his mouth is next to your ear, his left hand now resting on your hip. “You really need to stop insinuating that I’m a virgin sweetheart. If you were nicer to me, I’d show you that I know how to fuck.” With that he backs up and heads out of the break room.
You let out the breath you didn’t realize you’d been holding. Jesus Christ. You swear you almost came.
And if you were nicer to him? Fuck him. He’s not nice to you either. That’s okay. You have someone who can scratch this itch.
You pull out your phone and send a quick text.
To: Fuckboi
You busy tonight? I could really use a release.
The reply came almost immediately.
From: Fuckboi
Didn’t get enough of my cock this weekend huh? I suppose I could make myself available.
You roll your eyes and quickly reply with your address and what time to be over.
The rest of the day passes by slowly. It takes you half the day to enter Steve’s expense report. God he’s descriptive. At least it’s completed. You can’t really say that much for the other Avengers. They usually half assed them and made them barely acceptable.
You are shutting down for the day when Steve approaches your desk. You remove your glasses and look at him expectantly. “Is there something I can help you with, Steve?”
A blush creeps it’s way across his cheeks. “Um, I was actually just wondering if you had time to go over the new expense report forms? They should be a lot easier to fill out.”
You glance down at the clock on your computer. Ransom is going to be at your place in about 20 minutes.“Can we do it tomorrow? I have company that’ll be showing up at my apartment in like 20 minutes.”
His hopeful smile falls. His face is now unreadable. “Would your company happen to be whoever you spent the weekend with?”
Confused, you grab for your purse after getting your computer shut down. “Actually, yes. Should I have asked your permission first?” You attempt a joke to ease the sudden tension.
He pulls out his phone and starts typing furiously. Wow. You weren’t aware he knew how to text. You hear it ping with a reply before he angrily puts it back in his pocket. “Sure, we can do this tomorrow. Wouldn’t want to get in the way of your whoreing around.”
Your jaw drops in surprise. Sure you guys were always throwing jabs at each other. But he’d never said anything like this before. And in such a mean tone.
You round your desk and stand right in front of him. “Fuck you, Steve.”
You hurry towards the elevators before he can see the tears that have welled up. You couldn’t let him know he had that power over you. Asshole. Thank god Ransom was coming over. Hopefully he could fuck what Steve just said right out of your head.
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You’ve lost count of how many orgasms Ransom has pulled from you with his mouth when there’s a knock on your door.
Ransom looks up at you from his kneeling position on your living room floor. “Did you invite someone else to join us, pretty girl?”
You scoff and push him away so you can stand up. You pull your dress down as you make your way towards the door. “Yeah. I can barely handle just you. I’m pretty sure if we added someone else, I’d actually die.”
You open the door and gasp in surprise. “Steve? What are you doing here?”
He rubs the back of his neck nervously. “Look, I know you probably already have company but I felt really bad about what I said to you earlier today and wanted to apologize.”
You have so many questions. “How did you know where I lived?”
That sheepish smile makes its appearance again. “I may or may not have looked in your employee file.”
You shake your head. “And you felt the need to come all the way here and apologize? Why not just text me?”
“It would only have felt right to me to do it in person. I really am sor-”
You feel a pair of arms wrap around you from behind. “Well, who do we have here? Why is Captain America at your door?”
You turn your head to address Ransom. “He just came by to apologize to me. I think he was just leaving.”
Steve has a disappointed look on his face. “Yeah, I suppose I was.”
“Awe, what a shame. I thought you were gonna ask him to join us, pretty girl.”
Steve’s eyes grow wide at the thought. You quickly speak up. “No, I don’t think he’d be comfortable with that. He’s a little old fashioned.” You give him a sincere smile. You didn't think that was a bad thing.
Steve looks back towards the elevators and then back to you. He clears his throat. “What if I wanted to join you?” Seeing your wide eyed look, he quickly adds, “Only if Y/N would be comfortable with that of course.”
You contemplate what the consequences could be in your head. But then you get distracted when Ransom starts grinding his hard on against your ass. “Come on, pretty girl. Make a decision.”
The next word comes out of your mouth faster than what your brain can process. “Okay.”
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Now you were standing awkwardly in your bedroom with Steve and Ransom looking at you expectantly.
You’ve never done this before so you’re not sure how this is supposed to go. “So, um. How do we start exactly?”
Ransom smirks and comes up behind you. “I think you should call the shots, pretty girl. If you’re okay with that, Steve?”
With the mention of his name, he walks towards you and places his hands on your hips. “I think that’s a great idea. Can I kiss you now?” He places his hand under your chin and raises your face up to meet his. “I’ve waited a long time for this, sweetheart.” With that, his lips meet yours. It’s explosive. You quickly wrap your hands around his neck and press yourself up against him.
You get so lost in the kiss, you forget that Ransom is there. That is until he presses his lips against your neck and presses himself against your ass. It presses you even further against Steve, making you feel his excitement against your lower belly.
You’re so overwhelmed already and you’d barely started. You may not survive this evening.
As you move your hands down to remove Steve’s shirt, Ransom is unzipping your dress, pressing kisses to every inch of exposed skin.
Without breaking the kiss, Steve moves his hands around to unhook your bra so he can get his hands on your breasts. He pinches your nipples, causing you to moan into his mouth. He moves his lips to your neck, sucking on your pulse point.
After successfully removing your dress, Ransom stands back up and turns your head to connect your lips. He starts rutting his clothed hard on against your naked ass. His left hand reaches around to bat one of Steve’s away so he can squeeze your breast.
Steve takes the hand that had been swatted away and moves it down to your soaking wet core. He starts lightly circling your clit. Just enough pressure to make you mewl.
You reach behind you with your left hand and tug at the waistband of Ransom’s briefs. “Off.” You moan out as you take your right hand and start attempting to take off Steve’s jeans. He smirks into your neck and helps you out. He barely gets them unbuttoned and unzipped before you’re reaching your hand into them and his boxers to grab his cock. It feels big.
Ransom grabs your left hand and places it on his now free cock. You wrap your hand around it and give it a squeeze before you start pumping your hand up and down. You do the same to Steve’s, making the both of them let out grunts against both sides of your neck. Steve increases the pressure on your clit a little. Still not enough.
“Nee-need, you. Please.” You weakly moan out. Ransom moves his mouth up to your ear. “How do you want us, pretty girl?”
You reluctantly pull away from both of them so you can think. You decide to be greedy. You point to Steve. “I want you to lay on the bed, please.”
He does as you ask. Putting his hands behind his head as he awaits further instructions.
You get on the bed and straddle him. You turn around and reach your arm out for Ransom. “Want you behind me.” You lean over and open your bedside drawer to grab the lube and toss it at Ransom. He smirks as he straddles Steve’s legs and gets behind you. He uncaps the lube and starts coating his cock with a generous amount. “Need my cock in that ass, pretty girl?”
You hold up your hand. “Wait.” You lean down towards Steve and give him a quick kiss. “Are you okay with this?”
He nods his head. “As long as you are.” You raise back up and smile at him. You turn your head and look at Ransom. “I’m assuming you're okay with this?”
He just smirks and squeezes some lube out so that it slides down the crack of your ass. “More than okay, pretty girl. Need me to stretch you out first?”
You smirk and pull him in for a quick, filthy kiss. “I think it got plenty stretched out this weekend.”
He matches your smirk. “You little slut. Wanting both of our cocks stuffing you full.”
You whimper as he lands a smack on your ass. Leaning up on your knees, you grab a hold of Steve’s cock and start running his tip up and down your folds. He places his left hand on your right hip and his right hand on your left thigh. “Condom?”
You quickly shake your head and pause your actions. “On the pill. Unless of course you’d be more comfortable with one.”
He shakes his head. “No, just making sure.”
You turn back to Ransom. “I’ll let you know when I’m ready for you.”
He nods and places his hands on your shoulders, waiting somewhat patiently.
You slowly sink down on Steve’s cock. He’s stretching you out so deliciously. It burns in just the right way. Ransom may be longer, but Steve is definitely thicker.
After you get fully seated on him, you take a minute to adjust. It only takes a few seconds. You turn your head towards Ransom. “Okay, I’m ready.”
He removes his right hand from your shoulder and grabs the base of his cock and starts pressing against the tight ring of muscle. He’d been in there a lot over the weekend. But it was still a tight fit regardless. He doesn’t go as slow and sheaths himself to the hilt, causing you to moan out in slight pain and pleasure.
Holy fuck. You feel so full. You think you might die. That is until Ransom removes his cock until just the tip remains and then forcefully thrust back in, causing you to grind on Steve’s dick.
Steve grunts out from the movement and starts thrusting up into you the best he can from his position. Ransom wraps his left arm around you and continues his thrusts, not letting up his pace. You don’t even really have to move, the both of them doing it for you. They somehow find the perfect rhythm. Each of them pulling out and pushing in at the same time. One of your hands is behind you, resting on the back of Ransom’s head while the other is resting on Steve’s chest.
Steve sits up suddenly and pulls you in for a kiss. “Like being stuffed with both of our cocks, pretty girl?” You hear from behind you. “Yes. So good. So full. Gonna cum.”
Ransom removes his arm from around you and reaches down and starts circling your clit. “Do it. Cum all over us. Make a mess.”
Steve can feel you squeezing him. “Please, sweetheart. Need to feel you cum on my cock. You’re gripping me so good.”
You explode. You clamp your eyes shut, seeing stars behind your eyelids. You let the both of them fuck you through it.
Ransom’s hips stutter. The fluttering around his cock is too good. He cums with a shout of your name, filling up your ass to the brim. He gives you a few more thrusts before he pulls out and collapses beside you two.
Steve’s been patient while you come down from your high. He lays back down, pulling you with him so that your chest to chest. He bends his knees and grabs onto your hips. “You ready, sweetheart?” You raise up, both of your hands on each side of his head. You give him a nod.
That’s all he needs. He starts fucking you, hard and fast, chasing his release. He can feel it building. He just needs to feel you come undone around him again. He moves one of his hands and starts circling your clit with his thumb. “Need you to cum for me again, Y/N.”
You shake your head. “Can’t. Too much.”
Ransom sits up beside you. “I know what she needs.” He reaches over with his left hand and wraps it around your throat, squeezing gently.
It makes you clench down on Steve’s cock. “Yeah? That all you needed, sweetheart? A hand wrapped around your pretty throat? I know you like it. Can feel you squeezing me.” He picks up his pace. The only sounds that can be heard are his grunts, your breathy monas, and skin slapping against skin.
It doesn’t take long for your orgasm to hit you. This one is somehow even more intense than the last.
You must’ve blacked out for a few seconds because the next thing you know, you’re waking up in between Steve and Ransom.
Steve smiles down at you. “There she is. We lost you for a second, sweetheart.”
You feel drunk. You smile goofily up at him. “Did you cum?”
Just as you ask that, you can feel his release seeping out of your overused cunt. Then you feel cum leaking out of your ass. You hide your face behind your hands in embarrassment. “I can’t believe we just did that.”
Ransom removes one hand while Steve removes the other. “Nuh uh uh. No hiding allowed, pretty girl. I have no regrets.” He looks at Steve. “Do you?”
Steve smiles down at you and leans down to press a soft kiss against your lips. “None from me. You tired, sweetheart?”
You let out a big yawn and nod your head, slowly closing your eyes. “Get some rest, pretty girl.” That’s the last thing you hear before sleep takes you.
😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈
You wake up sometime in the early morning, stretching out your sore limbs. You know you have a dumb smile on your face. But you can’t help but notice your empty bed.
You sit up and hiss at the deliciously sore feeling between your legs. You grab your robe and slip it on. You can smell coffee coming from the kitchen. You giddily make your way out of the room and down the hallway. They both barely just come into view, still unaware you’re there, when you hear Steve speak.
“I thought you were going to be an asshole to her? Make her see I’m not that bad.”
You hear Ransom next. “I was an asshole to her. I’m sorry I dicked her down so good that she wanted more.”
Steve scoffs. “I never gave you the okay to fuck her!”
“You also didn’t tell me it was off limits. Look you got what you wanted right?”
“No, actually I didn’t. I didn’t pay you so we could have a threesome together.”
What the fuck? Steve paid Ransom to help him get in your pants?
“Ok, how about this? I’ll give you all of your money back if I can fuck her one more time before I go? Then we’ll be squared away.”
Steve seems to be conflicted. “Fine! But this is the last time Ransom. I have to get to work anyway. After this, she’s mine. And make sure she’s not late for work herself.”
Before you have time to react, Steve rounds the corner and sees you standing there. He has a deer caught in headlights look. Ransom comes up beside him and sees you. “Oh, honey, you weren’t supposed to see that.”
You slowly start backing up towards your bedroom. Steve moves towards you, stopping once you put your hands up. “Stay away from me! Both of you! I want nothing to do with either of you!”
Ransom moves past Steve and grabs onto your arms. “Oh, please. You’d fuck us again if we wanted. Wouldn’t you?”
You spit in his face. “Fuck you, Hugh.”
He gets a sinister look on his face. “Wrong move, pretty girl.” He looks toward Steve. “Don’t worry, I’ll fuck the brat out of her. You better tell her boss she won’t be in today.”
Your eyes go wide at his words. You start thrashing against him, trying your best to get away. Steve has had enough. He comes over and yanks you away from him and presses you against the wall. “You better calm down, sweetheart. I’ll treat you like a princess if you can be my good girl. Can you do that?”
You shake your head. “Why would you think I’d want anything to do with you after finding out you paid someone to help get into my pants?”
He gives you an evil smirk. “Because if you don’t, I’ll just have to release the tape of last night on the internet. Let everyone see how much of a slut you actually are.”
You narrow your eyes at him. “You’re bluffing.”
He smirks and turns his head towards Ransom. “Show her.”
Ransom gets his phone out of his pocket and swipes at the screen for a second before turning it in your direction.
Holy shit. They weren’t bluffing. There you were, getting fucked by the both of them. That would ruin you if it got out. Not only would you get fired, but your parents would probably disown you. You’d never have a normal relationship again. You’re fucked. Even more than you were last night. How had you not noticed they were recording it?
Ransom must have read your mind. “I set my phone up while you were busy with Steve’s fingers on your cunt and his tongue down your throat. I think you need to ask her again Steve.”
Steve grabs your chin and moves your gaze onto his face. “I’ll ask you again. Are you going to be my good girl? Let Ransom fuck you one more time and then it’ll just be me and you?”
You drop your gaze to the floor. You feel a tear run down your cheek as you whisper out, “I’ll be your good girl.”
Taglist: @stargazingfangirl18​ @drabblewithfrannybarnes​ @harrysthiccthighss​ @lllols @patzammit​ @quxxnxfhxll​
Steve Taglist: @donutloverxo​
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noonborykedabory · 2 years
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The Turning Red 9/11 review is probably old news at this point but I’m really fucking angry tonight and need to blow off some steam, so I am finally breaking my silence on this matter, because there is so much I need to scream about.
This is not in any particular order because I just don’t fucking care, so bear with me as we sift through what is possibly the angriest post I will ever make on this hellsite.
“Boy bands were on the way out”
Bullshit. I was born in 2004, and let me tell you, boy bands were absolutely still in during the late 2000s and into the 2010s (Inside Out, another Pixar film released in 2015, directly states the main character likes boy bands at the end). Even ignoring the obvious example of One Direction, there were pop groups like Big Time Rush, punk groups like Fall Out Boy, Panic! at the Disco, and today, we have K-pop groups like BTS. In fact, there is literally a member of 4*Town directly based on a member of BTS.
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See that? That’s a breathing reminder that boy bands are still popular and that your point is literally false.
“This strange adult trying to completely obscure their appearance, carrying a box”
1. The only thing different about Ming’s appearance in that scene is that she’s wearing sunglasses, which is something the Aunties do later in the film when they are doing the opposite of obscuring their appearances, 2. Ming has a child in the school (who’s in Grade 8, so she’s been there for three years), so they would absolutely recognize a child’s parent, especially one as overprotective as Ming, and 3. What box? It was hidden in her purse, out of sight of the security man. Even then, the box is very obviously a box of menstrual pads, and not something that would raise suspicion.
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Gee, I sure do wonder who that is...
“I bring {9/11} up because it radically altered the culture of the time”
Then how come I didn’t learn about it until I was 12, in 2016, when the 2000s were over? By the way, I see you showing a Muslim character on screen when you start bringing up a terrorist attack that sparked a huge wave of Islamophobia that still hasn’t stopped today. Real classy there.
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That poor woman. She didn’t deserve this shit.
“The dad has two words throughout the whole thing, then near the end he decides to become an actual character”
THE MOVIE IS NOT ABOUT JIN! THE POINT IS THAT THE RELATIONSHIPS BETWEEN THE MOTHERS AND DAUGTHERS ARE STRAINED AND NEED TO BE FIXED! JIN IS SUPPOSED TO HAVE A SMALL PRESENCE BECAUSE HE IS LARGELY UNINVOLVED IN THE PROBLEM!
You’re just mad that Jin didn’t have a larger role because he’s a man, aren’t you. This whole fucking video reeks of misogyny.
“Anime was a more niche thing”
More bullshit! Anime like Pokemon, Dragon Ball, and Sailor Moon (a major influence on the movie) became popular in North America during the 90s, and exploded in popularity in the 2000s! The early 2000s were also around the time that anime-style effects became more common in Western cartoons (see: Teen Titans 2003). Anime was more of a flavour of the decade than fucking 9/11!
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See? Stacy understands the assignment. Why don’t you?
“(literally anything he says about Ming, take your pick)”
You clearly do not understand the point of the term “exaggeration for comedic effect”. The point of scenes like the school scene and the Daisy Mart is that Ming is overreacting, and it’s causing a rift between her and Mei that needs to be resolved before the movie’s conclusion.
Also, the way you word things makes it sound like Ming went to the Daisy Mart for Devon’s sake. She didn’t go because she wanted Devon to know that her daughter was drawing suggestive fanart of him, she went because she suspected someone she thought was a grown-ass adult was hitting on her 13 year old daughter. In what fucking world is Ming not justified to be pissed off at the idea that a 30 year old was trying to fuck around with her minor child? (Doesn’t mean it was right for her to shout at him, just saying I totally understand her mama bear rage)
“blah blah blah Disney selling your values back to you, yadda yadda rainbow capitalism, what the fuck ever, I don’t fucking care anymore”
This is where it becomes blatant that this review was written by a white man. Turning Red is important because it’s the first time a woman (a woman of colour too, no less) was able to direct a Pixar movie and not have that credit stripped from her and given to a man (ahem, Brave). It’s the first time a girl of colour has stepped into the spotlight in a Pixar movie. It’s the first time in God knows who long that I’ve watched a movie about a girl and really felt like it was truly about a girl. So many girls and women, of colour or not, felt seen by this movie, and it’s coming from Pixar, a company that previously had staggeringly poor treatment of women and POC. If this movie is not proof of how far Pixar has come, and isn’t a goddamn accomplishment, then I don’t know what is. 
Braceface is irrelevant because that show has nothing at all to do with Turning Red besides the two shows both starring teenage girls in early 2000s Canada. Turning Red talking about periods is just as important as Braceface talking about periods, because in case you couldn’t tell from the backlash this movie got, periods (and female puberty in general) are still something that a lot of people feel shame about, and it absolutely must be normalized. By the way, a lot of episodes of Braceface (not the one mentioned in the review, but a lot of others and even the entire third season), as well as a few episodes of 6teen, which started airing a few years later, were banned in the US because they talked about heavier subjects (which included elements of female puberty, adolescence, and yes, periods), so your point about being “dArInG” is also irrelevant, because when cartoons in that time period tried to “be daring” (a.k.a be realistic to a teenager’s life), they were very quickly shut down, or at least received major controversy.
This entire video was a disaster. It’s truly broken me. Turning Red was not the most perfect movie ever, but god DAMN I feel sorry for Domee Shi and her crew for having to put up with all of the shit their work has been receiving.
Thank you and good night. I’ll be jamming to 4*Town in the corner, if you don’t mind.
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#237
This is a direct follow up to Story #168.
“You Caleb? I’m Scott’s dad… Well this is awkward. I wasn’t expecting you to be this early. I figured that your bus would arrive at the station across the street at the hour. At least I think that was what I told my son I would pick you up. Oh well. Let’s get your stuff in my car right here. Even though there’s hardly anyone around we can talk with more privacy while I drive….
“You just have the back pack? OK, get in. Your side should be unlocked. Good…. You don’t have to thank me for picking you up. Of course I don’t mind taking you to Scott’s apartment. I only live not even two minutes from here. It’s really no problem on my part. What else do I have to do on a Saturday morning? Other than looking for a blowjob in that park bathroom….
“Oh, you can drop the coy shit thing, no one but you and me in here. Not five minutes ago you held my cock in your hand long stroking it while it was getting hard. You were getting amazed at its size, but then you didn’t have time to play because you were meeting someone—which turned out to be me. So I have a question, do you want to go back to my place a few minutes away and we can have some fun, or do you want to pretend that you didn’t want to throat me, pretend it didn’t happen, and then go to Scott’s place to wait for him to get off work later tonight?
“Here let me take out my dick for you to consider. You were captivated by it at the urinals. The windows are tinted for a reason. Now you can look at it without worry someone will walk in or catch you. Since you haven’t complained, I’ll just assume you are ok with going back to my place. Don’t worry, I live alone and I have no nosy neighbors. It’s so private that I don’t wear any clothes when I’m at home….
“You know, I would love for you to be naked too. Later on, we could have fun in my pool. Keep licking those lips. Why don’t you reach over and play with my cock while we go the few more blocks. See you have me leaking. Rub your finger in it; get it covered. Fuck yeah. You’re transfixed all right. I like that. I also like that you haven’t once tried to play with your pecker. My cock is all that matters here.
“Have you ever sucked cock before? Figured. Taste my leak. Like that? Heh, heh. That pre-cum slime, it’s like a drug; isn’t it? You’ve tasted it before? You a bathroom whore?… Of course you are. Now, there’s nothing wrong with being a whore, a slut, a tramp, a pussy, a bitch, a cunt, or whatever. You are just living up to what you are meant to be.
“You are what, 19? It’s great you know your role so early. Real men need mouths and asses like yours ready to use. I assume you’ve taken it up your shitter? Not that often? Understandable in a cruise toilet situation.
“I’ve been going to that toilet for blowjobs or asses to fuck for years now. All I have to do is take out my 8-and-a-halfer and two or three fags fight over it. Since my divorce and Scott moving out, it’s real convenient to bring the fag boys back home a few blocks away for more private fun, including pussy pounding….
“My house is that one over there on the corner. Once in the garage, we’ll go ahead and strip. There’s a workbench you can put your clothing on, and you can leave your pack in the car…
“OK the garage door is closed. Get out and strip. I want to see that ass of yours. You naturally follow orders. Keep that shit up. Hey, that’s a tiny dicklet. Don’t hide it. I like tiny dicks. You know what my favorite thing to do to tiny dicks? Ignore them. They are best when they are ignored and ignored by you as well. Trust me, my cock will be the focus here.
“Now show me that ass. Bend over. I want to see that pussy hole. I can’t wait to have my dick buried to the root in there. I am so going to make that pussy into a cunt. You know the difference? No. A pussy is a hole that a man has feelings towards, and a cunt is a hole to be used as an object to exploit for pleasure. And this hole of yours is itching to be used like that. I can just tell.
“You want to be used by men don’t you? Big men like me? Thought so. You want a man, a real man, to take you and make you an object of pleasure? Follow me faggot. Yeah, you know you are. Don’t you? Your cock-lette tells you every day that you are never going to be a man.
“Come with me past the pool to my work shed. I built it to separate my play from the rest of the house. It’s soundproof and full of toys. Don’t worry, we are not going to use them all right now. Some we might. That’s a sling over there. I’ll probably have you in it when I cunt you.
“That’s a rimseat. Have you ever eaten ass before? No?! You mean I have a rimming virgin? Have anyone stuck their tongue in your hole? So you know then that it is a wonderful feeling. You will be doing that to me.
“In fact, I just got this device from Germany last month and I haven’t tried it out on anyone. You’ll break it in with me. It’s not much, just a plank for you to lie on. Go ahead and put the center of your back on the plank. Where it narrows is where your head goes. It’s kinda weird, I know. Go on lie back.
“The designer suggested securing your torso down to the plank to prevent you from falling out. So I’m going to put this belt across your chest. This is a small cunt plug. It’s long but not that thick. It goes in like this. It’s there to prevent your ass from sliding off. There are handles for you grip along side and under the plank. Yeah just hold on to them,… then I can easily secure the wrist cuffs on you. Now you ain’t going anywhere.
“The way this works is that I straddle your head. Hey you get to look at my cock and balls from below, my ass crack too. Did I mention that the plank is motorized. Yeah it’s going to lift you up, and your face will be forced into my ass crack, with your mouth lining up perfectly with my sweaty shithole. And you are going to clean that shithole. It is one of your jobs here over the next few days.
“Yeah, I should fill you in, you ain’t going anywhere. Scott doesn���t care about you staying with him until your dorm opens up. In fact Scott is pretty much doesn’t care about you. He’s mostly done with your friendship. See I pay for his car and his apartment on one condition, he sends me barely legal boys he meets on campus to turn into cock hungry cunts.
“Yeah, this was all a set up. He befriended you, as he know you are my type. He told me all about when you came out to him, and subsequently telling him that you are a glory hole queen. You thought he was a totally hip straight guy, when in fact he was taking notes. So when we were setting you up, I had him tell you to meet me at the park, knowing that bathroom was too tempting for cruise tramp like yourself.
“Fuck, you were too easy. Now before your tongue reaches my hole I want you to look kinda above your head at my work table. Notice the yellow box? Well next to it is the webcam keep looking into it as your face makes its last few inches before it becomes my seat, with my shithole strangling your tongue. Do a good job, or else that electrified butt plug I put in your cunt is going to deliver one hell of a shock.”
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kohanayaki · 3 years
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.:Time and Time Again:. (Marauders Era x Reader) Ch 7
Severus looks back on everything that went wrong.
tw: non-consensual kissing/harassment, trauma responses
LINKS:   CH 1   CH 2    CH 3   CH 4   CH 5   CH 6   CH 7   CH 8
________________________________________________________
Ch 7 .:Things Unforgivable and Things Left Unsaid:.
Graduation day at Hogwarts was supposed to mark the beginning of a new adventure for you. Instead, it marked the day you decided that whatever it was between you and Severus Snape, friendship or otherwise, it was over.
Or at least that's what you had thought. Of course, the universe just loved making things more complicated for you. You were working with Charlie in Romania when you had gotten word that Severus defected from the death eaters and was now working as a double agent at Dumbledore's behest. He continued teaching Potions at Hogwarts, and was even indited as a member of the Order. If anything, that only solidified your decision to go to America instead of staying in London. You didn't even know what to think. Of course you trusted Dumbledore, confusing as the man was, but you didn't know if you could really trust Snape again. You had worked towards forgiving him; over time you moved past what happened, but it was difficult to really say it was 'resolved' when you quite literally haven't spoken a word to each other in over a decade. You didn't even know where to start.
For the entirety of your seventh year, you didn't speak a word to Severus. It was hard to imagine that such a tight knit trio like the one you, him, and Lily had formed could crumble in an instant, but that's exactly what happened.
The end of your sixth year at Hogwarts was a quarter Snape would never forget, no matter how hard he tried. It was when everything fell apart. . .
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   1976  ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“James!” you yelled, running to the top of the hill where he and the rest of the Marauders had Snape held upside down.
“What are you doing?” you said, immensely hurt and trying to keep your voice steady, “You said this would stop, you promised. . . you swore.”
“(Y/n), I. . .” James trailed off, immediately feeling guilty. As he turned to you Snape dropped to the ground, attempting to scramble to his feet but finding his ankle twisted.
Sirius moved towards you to say something but you put your hand up firmly.
“No,” you said, “not a word out of you, Black.”
Sirius stared at you, wide-eyed, shrinking back as you called him by his last name for the first time in a long while. Not Sirius, not Pads. Black. As if your whole friendship had just been reset.
“And you two,” you said, addressing Remus and Peter, “how could you let this happen?!”
All four boys looked at you in shame, none of them daring to verbally respond.
Suddenly, Lily came running up the hill, having fallen behind you in your quick pace.
“Severus!” she panted, rushing over to him, “are you alright?”
Snape was in an angered daze, not even registering the words being said around him. The blood rushing through his veins felt like lava, his heart pounding in his ears, his chest, his tongue. His face burned with humiliation and hatred. Pure fucking hatred for James Fleamont Potter. For Lily to see him like that. . . for you to see him like that, pathetic, helpless, in need of your help once again. He wouldn't have it. He was a master of the dark arts now, he didn't have to fucking take this. He would curse Potter into the next century, he would—
“Severus!”
Snape's eyes snapped open, not even realizing they were closed. The world came rushing in around him and he was suddenly acutely aware of Lily's hand on his arm. He reeled back at her touch as if he'd been burned.
“Don't touch me!” he screeched, startling the redheaded girl. Her eyes were filled with concern, but all Snape could see was pity.
“Sev—“
“I don't need any help from you, you filthy Mudblood!”
And everyone in the clearing stilled.
The color drained from Snape's already pale face as he realized what he'd just said.
“Lily. . .” Severus whispered; pleading, desperate.
“Don't come any closer,” Lily said, her voice stone cold as tears welled up in her eyes.
“I'll kill you,” James said lowly.
“Prongs, no—”
“I'll kill you, you slimy bastard!” James growled, Remus moving quickly to hold him back.
You stood in the middle of it all, staring at Severus. Severus, who'd always told Lily that blood status didn't matter. Severus, who you and Lily always stood up for no matter what. Severus, who you thought you had feelings for up until this exact moment.
Without even thinking you stepped forward, grabbing Lily's hand.
“Let's go, Lils,” you said, your expression unreadable as you looked down at Severus. Lily squeezed your hand back gratefully, fighting the sobs racking her chest as she turned around and took off with you.
“(Y/n), wait—” Snape tried to get up but found himself shoved back down to the ground by Sirius.
“No,” he said sharply, “you don't get to say anything to either of them, you hear me?”
“I—”
“What?” James spat, “you're sorry? Well sorry doesn't cut it! You say a word to her after what you called her and you'll wish you'd never have been born.”
Snape's head hung low, that wish already present in his mind.
“Leave him,” Remus said, this time not out of mercy, but malice; letting Snape wallow in his own misery as he left with his friends, looking for you and Lily.
Soon, Severus was left alone. Just as he began, and just as he should have never hoped for anything different. Was this it? That's how it was going to end? One mistake, and the only two people he'd ever cared about were ripped away from him.
No. He decided he had to apologize properly, consequences be damned. If those Marauders wanted to beat him to a bloody pulp afterwards, that was fine by him. He just needed to talk to Lily one more time. To tell her how deeply sorry he really was.
He took off down the hill, sprinting towards the castle and completely ignoring the burning pain in his ankle. He rushed through the grass, ignoring the looks he received from the other students walking by. He ran past the oak tree, through the castle gates, flying through the corridors and cutting across the courtyard when he skid to a stop at what he saw.
Lily and James stood in the center of the garden, her arms wrapped around his neck, pulling him closer as his lips captured hers. Her eyes were still wet with tears, the tears that he had caused. Severus didn't do a thing. His presence remained unknown to them as he slunk away back to his common room, heart silently breaking.
He was too late.
Nothing was the same after that.
Lily insisted that if you wanted to remain friends with Snape, as she now referred to him, she wouldn't hold it against you, but she made it very clear that she would never forgive him herself. But it wasn't as easy as wanting to stay friends with him or not; he'd changed that day.
After some time to let things settle down you tried to approach him, but he only became more and more hostile towards everyone, including you. You hardly saw him anymore. The only time you occasionally spotted him was when he was walking around school with Malfoy, Mulciber, Wilkes, and Avery, unable to look you in the eye lest you see the utterly crushed expression on your face as he fell deeper and deeper into the dark side.
You held your books tightly to your chest as you made your way to Hagrid's hut for one of your last Care of Magical Creatures class. You were being paired up with a few lower classmen to teach them the ropes for feeding all the creatures Hagrid kept in the meadows. You were a tad late, having been preoccupied at lunch, speedwalking to try and arrive on time when you saw a flash of silver-blue light emit from inside the forest. You could hear warbled shouting and laughter coming from the same direction, and your instincts told you to run.
However, because your nerves were on high alert, that also told you someone in there was in danger, and you couldn't just walk away from that. You drew your wand, abandoning your books by a rockface and moving towards the commotion, the distorted shouting soon becoming words.
“Oh come on, you little runts, you lot can do better than that!” you recognized Mulciber's voice.
A young girl shrieked as a giant acromantula barred its fangs at her, its front legs raised and poised to attack. Her friends were huddled in a corner, more students who couldn't have been older than second or third years, being forced to watch by Avery and Wilkes.
“How's this for Care of Magical Creatures, eh?” Mulciber taunted as he walked over to the other students, pulling a young boy out from the group.
“No!” the girl cornered by the spider cried, “please, don't!”
“Aw, how cute,” Mulciber drawled, “is this your little boyfriend, huh? Shame.”
The boy screamed in fear as he was suddenly lifted into the air by his ankles, forced to hover right above the spider just out of its reach. You wanted to wretch as you watched the scene unfold, unable to keep yourself hidden any longer.
You leaped into the clearing, a quick flick of your wrist relieving Mulciber of his wand. You did the same to Wilkes as he turned to you.
“Well well, why am I not surprised?” Avery scoffed. Right behind him stood Severus, his expression vacant.
“Grab this, and get to Professor McGonagall immediately,” you shouted to the younger Gryffindor students, tossing them a gold galleon. As soon as they touched the coin, the portkey shot them all back to the castle.
“Why are you always the one spoiling our fun?” Mulciber sneered.
“Someone's gotta do it,” you said, putting up a brave front although you were under no illusion as to your situation. You weren't fourth years anymore, and you were alone this time. They'd been studying the dark arts for the past two years. You knew you were outmatched, even with your dueling skills.
“Oh, come on, (Y/n), don't be a bore.”
You turned around at the sound of the familiar voice to see Rosier, an easy grin set into his face. Your heart dropped.
“So you too, huh?” you chuckled bitterly, “and here I thought you were one of the few good ones left.”
“You're not really that naive, are you?” he tutted, “you had to have known I would be inducted eventually. Might even get Barty to join us, even if he is a little nutty.”
You went for a stunning spell but found your wand spinning out of your hand before you even saw him move.
“Not so fun to be on the receiving end, is it?” Rosier said, “you're not the only one versed in non-verbal magic, (Y/n). In fact, I'd even go so far as to say we've surpassed you. Lucius will be furious, but I like you a lot, so I'll re-extend his old offer for him. Join us.”
You had no wand, no backup, no way out of this, but you stood your ground nonetheless.
“Eat shit,” you seethed. Rosier glowered at you, taking a few menacing steps forward. He grabbed your jaw firmly and you grit your teeth.
“I don’t think you heard me—”
He reeled back as you spit right in his face,
“You bitch,” he growled, wiping his face in disgust, “clearly no one ever bothered to train you.”
Without your wand you were really only left with one option, ready to defend yourself by revealing your animagus form, but you never got to take the first step forward.
“Imperio!”
You stopped in your tracks as a veil of what could only be described as pink fluff drifted over your mind. A smile immediately appeared on your face, and a giggle rose in your throat.
Severus looked at Rosier with horror, the rest of his crew looking among themselves uneasily.
“What do you think you're doing?” Snape hissed, “are you trying to get us all expelled?”
“So what?” Rosier said, “we've used the killing curse loads of times.”
“On insects, you loon,” Snape shot back, hoping his concern for you was masked enough.
“Don't worry, I'm not gonna hurt your precious (Y/n), Sev.”
The nickname made his stomach churn. You used to call him that. Lily used to call him that. No one else did. No one else got to.
“Release them,” he said, raising his wand, “now.”
“Put that away,” Rosier's eyes narrowed, a smirk sliding back onto his face as he got an idea, “hey, (Y/n)?”
“Yes?” you answered, your voice dripping with honey.
“I don't think Severus likes you being under this spell,” Rosier said, “but you like it don't you?”
“Mmm hmm,” you nodded, your head feeling like it was floating, “it feels so nice.”
“You know what else would feel nice?” Rosier goaded, “if you gave our friend Sev here a kiss.”
Severus' heart dropped to his stomach.
“You're sick, Rosier,” Snape said, his voice close to tremmoring.
“You don't have to act like you don't want it,” Evan chuckled, “we've watched you putz around (L/n) like a fool for years. Besides, they want to. Isn't that right, (Y/n)?”
“He's right,” you said, your voice deceptively melodic, “I love you, Severus. I've always loved you.”
And in that moment, Snape had never hated himself more. Because he didn't care that Rosier was making you say the things you did. He didn't care that you were under the influence of a curse. All he could hear was the words he longed to hear spill from your lips, over and over like a skipping record.
I love you, Severus. I love you, Severus. I love you, Severus.
He played the words on repeat in his head. His heart was beating almost painfully in his chest, so much so that he hardly even noticed you slowly walking towards him, wrapping your arms around his neck like Lily had done to James. And when you leaned forward to kiss him, his selfish desires held him in place.
It had lasted a fraction of a second, but he didn't pull away. It was the greatest regret of his life that he didn't walk up to Rosier, break his nose, and curse every single person in that clearing instead of doing nothing, knowing full well you had no control over your actions.
When his eyes drifted open and met yours and his stomach twisted into ugly knots, fear and panic wracking through his spine. Your eyes were completely empty, irises a vacant white, and in that moment it felt as if he were kissing a corpse.
Suddenly the color returned to your eyes, and fear immediately filled them. Snape grunted as he was shot away from you, unable to move when he hit the ground. The other Slytherins looked around for the assailant, but they had no time to react when every single one of their wands was pulled from their hands. McGonagall stood there, expression the same as ever but clearly brimming with fury.
“(L/n), come,” she said, ushering you over and taking you protectively in her embrace, “we'll get you to Madame Pomfrey.” Her eyes narrowed dangerously as she regarded Snape and the rest of their group, “As for you,” she said, “Mr Filch, secure them in the dungeons until the Headmaster calls for them. And put all of their wands in the lockbox.”
“With pleasure,” Filch said, almost blending in with the trees behind her.
“Are you alright?” McGonagall asked you as she helped you back towards the castle.
“No,” you said, honestly, “n-no, I don't think I am.”
“No amount of apology could ever equate to the remorse I feel that this happened to you, (L/n),” she said earnestly, “I am truly sorry. This was completely unacceptable, and I will see to it that the proper measures are taken for their punishments. Expulsion would suit just fine, but even if the Headmaster disagrees, I will personally ensure you never come into contact with any of those boys again.”
“Thank you,” you said, your voice sounding hollow in your own ears.
You didn't remember walking the near half-mile to the infirmary. Madame Pomfrey's words felt so far away, as if she were speaking underwater. You just remembered laying down in the hospital wing bed as she checked you for any lasting damage, and as soon as she'd turned her back you'd just wept.
________________________________________________________
That night, Snape found himself in the Prefect's bathroom, leaned over the sink and watching the water rush into the drain. His hands clutched the marble sides of the basin so hard his knuckles turned white, every breath catching painfully in his chest before he forced it out to take another shaky inhale. He was an idiot, he knew. There was no fixing this. Not really. First Lily, now you. Was he just predestined to lose everyone in his life?
He paused. No, he didn't deserve to think like that. Everything that had gone wrong was his own doing.
When he heard the door to the bathroom open he whipped around, ready to curse whoever dared to interrupt him until he saw you standing there, your eyes red from crying and the Marauder's Map clutched in your hands like a vice. He was half certain you were a hallucination, but as soon as he pulled himself to the present, he rushed to apologize. You had to know how horrible he felt about what he did, even if you would never forgive him. He made the mistake of being too cowardly to properly apologize to Lily, he wouldn't make that mistake again.
“(Y/n), I'm—”
“I know you're sorry,” you said callously, “and I know you mean it. That's not the issue.” you took a breath to collect yourself before you continued. This was so much harder than you thought it would be. Maybe this wound really was too fresh right now. You thought you'd be able to handle this conversation, but your prior feelings weren't making this any easier.
“Why did you do it?” you asked quietly, “Better, why did you do nothing? You were my friend, Severus.”
Whatever was holding back the flood of emotions in him, it snapped at your words.
Were. Past tense.
“I don't know what I was thinking,” Snape said in exasperation, though it came off more as anger directed at himself. His hands threaded through his messy black locks, his eyes nearly manic. You'd never seen him unravel quite like this. He was desperate to fix this, to keep you in his life. “No, I wasn't thinking at all, (Y/n). I couldn't, not when you were . . . not when I. . .”
Don't say it, don't say it, don't say it—
“Not when I've fancied you for years.”
Snape knew immediately that he had made a mistake. The expression on your face made his stomach twist, and he knew there was no taking back what he said.
“No,” you said, tears welling in your eyes, “Severus Snape, don't you dare say that. What, do you think that just makes this all okay? You're an oblivious idiot, you know that?”
Your heart ached so bad it felt as if you couldn't breathe.
“Do you know how many times I wished you would have kissed me?” you said shakily, not bothering to hide the hurt in your voice.
Snape was sure his breathing had stopped, eyes wide with shock. He couldn't have heard that right. Did you really feel the same way about him? But reality hit him in the face when he saw your expression. This was no heartfelt confession on your part.
“For you to just. . . for it to happen like that,” you said, still struck with betrayal and disbelief, “If you've ever respected me, you never would have let that happen. I was under a curse, Severus. And you took advantage of that— of me. All because you were too much of a coward to just tell me how you felt. And then you go on and say you've liked me this whole time as a last ditch effort to save our friendship? How the hell did you expect me to react?”
He had nothing to say to that. He blamed himself entirely. Every verbal blow you struck he gladly took, he would have sat there still as stone if you hexed him, but you refused to draw your wand at him. You just stood there, staring straight through him with unbelievable hurt in your eyes.
“I can't do this, Severus,” you said, “please, just. . . just leave me alone. I'm not saying I'll never forgive you, but right now I can't even begin to think about that. Not now.”
You looked like you wanted to say something more, but your mouth snapped shut, and Severus saw the finality in your eyes. He stayed glued to the spot where he stood long after he watched you leave, his eyes trained on the door you'd slammed shut.
If you thought Snape had made himself scarce after what he said to Lily, after what he did to you he practically vanished. He no longer sat underneath the tree that had become so symbolic of your former trio. He no longer roamed the Slytherin common room, or even the Great Hall for meals. Instead he would walk through the forbidden forest alone, or hole up in some empty corridor purposely hiding but hoping you would walk up to him. You never did.
The people who did find him in the few days that followed were the newly named Marauders, though incomplete as they arrived without you. As he glanced down at the parchment in Lupin's hand he had no questions about how they'd located him. Snape grimaced, not bothering to get up from his seat beneath the stone pillar. Anything they did to him was what he deserved.
James stepped forward from the group first. His expression was unreadable, but Snape saw the way his jaw was set firmly in place, fists clenching and unclenching at his sides. The Slytherin had expected Potter to come at him guns blazing, sending a flurry of verbal attacks and hexes his way. However, James Potter simply stared down at his former enemy with a look that met in the intersection of barely contained anger and utter disappointment.
“You didn't deserve them,” he said coldly, his voice oddly level.
“I know,” Snape glared, but not feeling very self-righteous.
“No, you don't,” James said, his voice rising steadily, “you will never know what you put them through. You sat there while your lunatic friends used an Unforgivable Curse on them, and you took advantage of them. I don't care if you know, I'm going to throw it back in your face, because it's what you deserve.”
“I think it's clear that (Y/n) doesn't wish to speak with you any longer,” Remus said, “if for some inconceivable reason they want to in the future, they'll approach you. Don't you even think about going about it the other way around before they're ready and willing to talk. If they ever are.”
“It's settled, Severus,” James said simply, “you're officially not worth our time anymore.”
Snape blinked up at him, trying to recall a time when Potter had ever called him by his actual name.
“Don't get us wrong,” Sirius glared, “the only reason we aren't throwing you to the Womping Willow is because we know the last thing (Y/n) would want is her friends getting expelled because of them.”
“We'll leave you alone now,” Peter said grimly, “just like you've always wanted.”
And they were telling the truth. They left him completely alone, not speaking a word to him after that; 'they' now including you and Lily, which destroyed him more than any amount of bullying had before. He watched from afar as you grew closer and closer to the Marauders. . . no, you were a Marauder. It was only natural that you became almost like a family in your seventh year. You, James, Peter, Sirius, Remus, and Lily had become as inseparable as Snape thought you, him, and Lily were, but he'd ruined that. He had ruined every good thing that had ever happened to him and pushed away every important person in his life.
The last time he saw you was graduation day. Everyone was running around excitedly, dressed in the ceremonial jewel-toned robes of their respective houses as they awaited Dumbledore's speech. You had been sitting with your group as usual, now having carved out your own spot at the Gryffindor table, when you noticed that Snape was nowhere to be found.
You frowned, wondering why he of all people had to slip into your mind on a day like today.
“You alright, Fangs?”
Sirius' voice snapped you out of your thoughts.
“Yeah, I'm fine. . .”
His handsome features contorted in concern, but that easy grin slid back onto his face as he nudged you with his shoulder.
“What, you worried you're gonna miss us?” he smirked, “this isn't goodbye, you know. We'll all see each other at the Order meetings—”
“Which you always seem to talk about at an extraordinary volume,” Remus shushed him pointedly. Sirius brushed him off with a roll of his eyes.
“(Y/n), are you sure nothing's wrong?” James asked from across the table.
“I'm alright, Prongs,” you said, “I just. . . you know what? I just remembered I left something in my dorm, I'll be right back.”
Your friends exchanged worried glances as you got up from the table, taking off towards the Slytherin common room. It wasn't a total lie, but your intentions went against your better judgment. After today there was a very, very good chance you would never see Severus again. What he did wasn't okay by any means, and it would take more than an apology or a simple conversation to forgive him, but you needed closure at the very least. Not for him, but for you. You deserved that much.
You swiped the map off your bedside table and opened it fully, your eyes quickly picking out Severus' name near the cellars only a few rooms away from where you were. You took off quickly down the hall, reaching the intersection where all the dungeon's corridors converged when you spotted him. Your heart stopped.
His left sleeve was rolled up to his elbow, as was the person's standing across from him, their back to you. Even though you couldn't see the second person's face, you recognized who it was immediately.
Evan Rosier.
He wasn't on the map before. . . how had he gotten in?! He'd been expelled after the day he cursed you. Did he somehow find a way to bypass the anti-apparition charm?
You felt your breathing hitch, fear creeping under your skin. There, on both of their arms, was a tattoo of a skull, a serpent weaving its way through the mouth and eye sockets in an undeniable pattern.  You stopped breathing all together. You knew Severus had fallen into the dark arts, but to actually be a death eater? To be proudly showing off that awful display of radicalism along with the person who had used an Unforgivable Curse on you, who had invaded your free will and taken over your body. . .
Severus must have felt you even from the opposite side of the hallway, because something pricking at his skin told him to look up, and when he did he wished he never had. You were looking at him for the first time in over a year, your eyes full of terror. Rosier followed his gaze, but when he looked over his shoulder there was no one there.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Severus sighed, trying to push the less than pleasant memories out of his head. He knew by now he was likely the last person left in the house besides you, Harry, and Sirius who were all staying here. Something like hope had sparked in his chest when he saw the faintest ghost of a smile on your lips as you saw him for the first time since graduation. He wanted to talk to you, to tell you he knew he deserved nothing from you, but he would spend the rest of his life trying to make it right if you would only give him a chance after all this time. In truth, he missed his friend. With Lily gone, you were one of the closest things he had to that left.
Against his better judgment, Severus made his way up the stairs, silent as a thestral as he headed for your room, but he stopped in his tracks when he reached the top. Sirius' door was cracked open the slightest bit, and what Snape saw inside made his blood run cold. You were sitting next to Sirius on his bed, your head resting gently on his shoulder. As you craned your neck to look Sirius in the eyes, that's when Severus saw it— the way the Marauder looked at you. The way his face seemed to light up, the spark that returned to his gray eyes, the utter adoration in them.
And just like that, Snape was a seventeen year old boy again, transported right back to that courtyard garden, watching Lily and James share their first kiss on the day he had made one of the biggest mistakes of his life. His heart shattered silently, though his departure was not so quiet as he took off down the stairs as quickly as he could. He grimaced at his own feelings, ones he knew he had no business owning.
As he was about to open the front door to leave, his instincts suddenly screamed at him to turn around, and he was just barely able to cast an invisibility charm as you began to come down the stairs. He held his breath as he looked at you. He knew he had no right to think so, but you were still beautiful like this; dressed in pajamas, hair disheveled, eyes still sightly puffy and red. He saw you look around, knowing you had no doubt heard his rather noisy descent of the staircase, and he cursed himself for not leaving sooner. Your eyes searched what should have appeared to be the empty space in front of you, but he saw you look him in the eyes, and he knew that you knew.
“Severus?” you called his name out softly, and the sound felt like a strike to his face.
He wanted nothing more than to say something to you, talk to you, hold you. But his mind flashed back to the way you had been with Sirius, and his words died in his throat. He said nothing, trying to remain unphased at your hurt expression as you turned around to walk back up the stairs. As soon as your back was turned to him, he left, unable to bring himself to do anything more.
Once again, he was too late.
Read chapter 8 here!
Taglist:  @sleep-i-ness, @blackpinkdolan, @parker-natasha, @ornella0910 @undertaker1827 @thatwierdo-koemi @nxstalgicnxbxdy @calaryssia @aleksanderwh0r3 @juggysgirlfriend @beautifulsweetschaos @kattirin @mialupin1 @crazy-obsessed-fangirl, @youcantbesirius​
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writingsfromhome · 3 years
Text
Sorry x Rare
A/N: I got two lyric requests for Sorry by Beyonce and Rare by Selena Gomez. They were both sort of two sides of the same coin so I wrote them together it mostly goes from rare to sorry. Thanks for the requests, fingers crossed it lives up to what you wanted! <3
Synopsis: You and Harry have been together for a long time but he’s not the same man you fell in love with anymore.
-----
I move my dinner around on my plate, my gaze on the man pacing outside the restaurant on his phone. My man. But it didn't really feel like that these days. These days, Harry was a stranger to me--late nights, phone calls interrupting dinner, waking up to find him gone and not even sure if he'd come home at all.
I watch him remove the phone from his ear in a rush, stare at it, and then shove it aggressively in his pocket. He walks back in, cheeks pink and huffing.
"Should we ask for the bill?" He sits down in a flurry. I stare at his barely-eaten meal and my own dinner mashed to bits.
"We've barely had dinner."
"Babe, we've been here for over an hour since..." he takes his phone back out to inform me of how much time exactly but something must catch his attention because his sentence dies on his lips. I stare, he was so distant lately. "I'll drop you off at home, I've got to meet the boys they decided to talk business-"
"It's 8pm on a Thursday," I state the obvious. "Can't you catch up with them la-"
"This isn't an argument Y/N," Harry finally looks at me. He was done discussing it. He lifts his hands to the waiter and a minute later dinner's been paid for. He wasn't my baby, I think as we stroll outside to his car. I don't know who this man was.
***
I wake up the next morning with the weight of Harry on the other side of the bed. I could smell him, the booze sitting in his pores.
“Ugh,” I groan, not wanting to smell that first thing in the morning. I get up and start my day before I head to work. Soon, Harry appears squinting as I stir sugar into my coffee.
“I need a coffee,” he says, his voice hoarse. It used to sound sexy but now it was just another reminder that things changed. We lived like roommates and it hurt that he never wanted to talk. Half the time, he acted like I wasn’t even there.
I watch him settle with his coffee, taking the first sip and letting out a deep breath. A memory comes to me suddenly, the first year we were dating,
“I think this is the best coffee I’ve ever had,” it was the first night Harry had stayed the whole night and I’d made him coffee in my outdated coffee maker. It came out burnt half the time but that morning’s cup was decent. We’re swaddled in my blankets--the room I rented back then had poor circulation in the winter.
“I think you’re still slightly drunk,” I lean my shoulder against his and cup the warm drink. “I’ve definitely had better coffees.”
“Maybe coffees are just better the morning after,” he says, glancing at me and I know he can see the flush on my cheeks. He knew I was shy talking about certain things in the light of day.
“We can say that,” I mumble into the cup. “It’s just nice to have a heat source.”
“Here,” he takes the cup from me and reaches over to put both on the nightstand.
“Hey I wasn’t done with that.”
“I know but if you’re cold, I know this other heat source--it even works for hypothermia.”
His statement causes a blood rush that warms me already but I don’t say no to what he has in mind. I could make us another cup later.
Harry catches me staring when he looks over and raises an eyebrow. I snap out of my thoughts and twist my lips into a smile, looking back at my own drink bitterly. Who was this man in front of me? Out loud, I ask: “How was your night? You came in late.”
“I was out with the boys.” he says in a tone that meant he didn’t want to talk about it. “It got late.”
“A text would’ve been nice,” I say, still looking at my cup.
“S’not like you were waiting up,” he turns to walk back towards the bedroom.
“Learned not to,” I mumble but I know he’s heard me with the way he pauses. But he didn’t care enough to argue, dispute it, nothing. He leaves.
***
"Guess who just made a commission that's more than I used to earn in a year?" April walks into the small office, an infectious grin on her face.
"You sold him on it?" I put away the file I'm working on and jump up to hug my friend.
"I had to flirt a little--give him a vivid picture of what he could have there, and he signed! I'm bloody brilliant."
April was my American ex-pat who I met when she was looking for a flat a few years ago. And now here she was, working for me at the small real estate office I managed with a few other people I considered friends.
"Do you know if he was single?" I tune back in to hear Janelle asking.
"No, don't give her bad advice!" I scold Janelle. “We don’t date clients.”
"I'm miserably single," April pouts. "I'll take advice even if it’s bad."
"Bad advice is to stay with your college sweetheart to the point where you're not sure he even cares about you." I say to no one in particular. It was just us in the office today, and they knew everything about my life so I didn't care much. But the pin-drop silence that follows is different. I look up to see my friends eyeing each other. "What?"
"Nothing." They stay tight lipped but I push and they crack. "Well, so...we know things are rocky between you and Harry..."
"Things aren't rocky," I clarify. "They're just...nonexistent."
"Right," April slides closer. "Soo, we saw him at the club yesterday."
I raise my eyebrow, "He told me he was meeting up with his boys."
"Oh!" They sound surprised I know, but they look at each other again so I push them. "He was...there was a girl? Sitting on his lap for most of the night? Like, nothing happened I don't think so?" She turns to look at April at the end of each sentence.
Personally, I feel gut-punched even though I suspected this. I knew he wasn't where he said he was going to be sometimes, or with who he said he was going to be with. But he cut our own dinner short last night to be with strangers yesterday? I grip the pen in my hand.
"Y/N honestly...you know we love you and support you. But, you're a special girl and you deserve better than that sod."
"Yeah," Janelle puts her hand on my shoulder. "You're a gem Y/N. There's someone else out there who's gonna see how rare you are."
"I know," I blow my cheeks out. We'd had different conversations like this before, although never this direct. I guess we'd never had direct proof of what my husband was doing until now though.
"He's an idiot not knowing you're so rare," my friends try to comfort me. I feel my eyes well up and I swipe at them. I wasn't going to cry at work but they must sense the tears because they excuse themselves, "We're going to get you a tea, and some pastries to celebrate April's sale. April?"
I keep my face buried in my hands as they leave, take a few deep breaths. "I am rare," I say to myself but even that makes me laugh bitterly. Harry and I had been together for 5 years and here I was trying to count up all the reasons we should stay together when he didn't even care. He was out with other women, and I was waiting around for him.
"I'm rare," I say again. "I'm special, I deserve better. I...deserve better."
When will u be home tonight? I text Harry before I lose my nerve.
Busy he says. That’s it. And then, Why?
What time? I ask again.
8 or so, he responds.
Okay, we need to talk then. I put my phone away, too scared what he might text back. A tear falls from my cheek onto my keyboard, landing on the letter H. It mocks me. I wipe it off, and before I can think about what I'm doing I smash the letter down with my fist. I stand up and walk to the back of the office, a window overlooks the busy street. I'd had enough, I decide. Fuck Harry.
I’m not sure how long I stand there stewing, but my friends walking in with pastries and tea ends the emotional boiling pot from overflowing.
"Thanks," I take the cup from them.
“So we were talking and...” April looks at Janelle and she nods. “You should come out with us some time. Like...tonight. Dance with us, with other people...”
“I...I’ve got something at 8,” I come up with an excuse. As angry as I was, I wanted to have this conversation. It was long overdue.
***
I check my time again, the last text Harry sent me Ok. But it was 8:25 and Harry still wasn’t home. I’d give him five more minutes, I decide. I’d already tried to ring him with no answer.
I stare at the ring on my finger, it was supposed to symbolize a promise he made to me. What a fucking joke. I should’ve never said I do in the first place.
Was it young love, I wonder. Did we do this too fast and we were just set up to fail? But I remember the good memories, the soft and sweet times between us.
“I-I’ve never done something like this before,” I tell Harry. “I hate heights.”
“Listen,” he crowds around me, blocking my view of his friends who are walking up the narrow trail like it was any old walkway. “You go in front of me, I’ll have my hand on your back the whole time. I won’t let you fall. I promise.”
I look up into those gentle eyes and swallow my fear. “Okay.”
“I promise it will be so worth it,” he gushes, his excitement uncaged now that I’d agreed. “There’s no lights there so the stars are so bloody bright--I know you’re going to love it!”
I can’t help it, my lips crack into a smile at his boyish excitement. He catches it and pauses, a breath in this whirlwind of a night. What started out as a house party turned into a walk to a local beach which turned into a hike into the woods and up a precarious--and very steep--ridge to get to an isolated lookout. Only with Harry did I find myself in these situations. And I loved it. I loved him, I realise then. My expression must change because he tugs on my hand, probably worried I’d change my answer.
“Walk ahead,” he instructs and I nearly tip toe on the ridge that’s at least 30 feet across. But his steady hand on my back pushes me gently and I walk across confidently until I look down 2/3 of the way. I freeze in place but Harry’s ready. “Y/N, you’re safe here. Look at me-look...”
I crane my neck and he grounds me, oh my god how did I just realise now how in love I was with him? He squeezes my hand, asks if I was okay. I had to be, I couldn’t stay stuck in the middle.
Inch by inch we finally make it to the other side and I jump off with a yelp which sets Harry off in a burst of laughter. Pretty soon he’s lifted me over his shoulder and carries me to the lookout on the edge. My feet had been through enough, he’d said.
And he was right--it was so worth it; the view with all the stars laid out. The buildings and their light pollution below were blocked out by the outcrops and it made the stars twinkle in all their glory. It made it the perfect place to be with the person I loved.
“Isn’t it the most incredible view?” Harry whispers in awe behind me, his arms wrapping around my waist.
“I.....I have no words apparently,” I laugh and turn in his arms. “Thanks for pushing me, this...it was worth it.”
He tucks a strand of hair behind my ears and gazes at me in a way that makes me want to squirm. But I hold his gaze.
“Do you know how beautiful you are?” he asks with a smile.
“Compared to the view,” I glance behind us. “I guess I’m alright.”
“No,” he guides my face back towards his. “This view over that one, any day. M’just that lucky.”
My words die on my lips as I’m overwhelmed by this feeling between us, the one I thought would keep us together like this forever.
He raises an eyebrow when I go silent and I shrug, “I’m all out of words today.”
I close my eyes as he kisses my temple. I turn back around and we spend the moment in silence, drinking in the view. His friends chatter around us but they’re background noise. My life felt like a movie right now.
Before we leave as a group, I tug Harry back. This was a good as place as any to tell him. I press my lips to his, and it takes him a second but he’s kissing me back. Before it can get carried away I push away and tell him what I’d been thinking all night, “I love you.”
He takes a step back, and then he’s grinning and pulling me back. “I love you! I love you listen, I’ve been wanting to say that for weeks!”
“Weeks?!”
“Yeah weeks! My sister said it was too soon, I might scare you off!”
I think about a few weeks ago, I was intensely shy around him even then. Maybe she was right, but the idea that he talked about me to his sister makes me flush. I wrap my arms around his waist “I just...this moment is so perfect. I never want it to end.”
“It doesn’t have to.” he’d promised. “I’m yours forever Y/N.”
When 8:30 comes and goes I call April, she lets me know where they were. “We’re so happy you’re coming! Are you sure you don’t want us to meet you somewhere else?” she shouts into the phone. When I tell her I just wanted to be where they were she reminds me to text them when I was nearby.
I have to dig into the back of my closet, past the pantsuits I wore to work, the casual dresses and loungewear. I still had some of my old party clothes, just a bit tighter than they used to be. But for where I was going, it would fit in.
Before I leave, I take a pen and scrawl a note: “Great talk"
My friends spot me as I walk in. The music is instantly too loud, the lights too bright, and there are too many people. But one of my them shoves a drink in my hand and pretty soon it’s the best place on earth. It was exactly where I needed to be. I turn off my cellphone and enjoy myself.
After a certain point, I don’t even know who I’m talking to, but pressed up against a body, feeling wanted, it drives me to keep dancing all night. Eventually, I crash at April’s and don’t roll out of hers until 11 the next morning. Harry’s barely an afterthought until I’m tucked in the taxicab taking me home and turn on my phone. 8 missed calls, 2 voicemails and 13 texts.
I’m shocked at the volume, Harry hadn’t blown up my phone like this in over a year. I listen to one voicemail: “Where the hell are you? I come home an hour late and you’re bloody gone with this stupid note here. Pick up! I’ve called you a billion times.”
I stare at my phone, I hadn’t heard Harry this passionate since...well it was a long time. And all it took was going out late and not answering his calls, giving him a taste of his own medicine. It almost makes me angrier; I had to partake in this juvenile dance to get his attention, even though we’d been married nearly 2 years.
He’s on a call when I get home, talking numbers or something. I head directly to the shower, clean up, and take my sweet time. It must’ve driven him mad waiting for me because by the time I’m out he blows a gasket.
“What’s this stunt you pulled last night? Wanting to talk and leaving me a stupid sarcastic note just because I’m late? Where were you?”
“Out,” I shrug. “I didn’t know you were late. You didn’t text.”
“I didn’t tex--oh I see, now we’re being petty yeah?”
That irked me, “I’m not being petty. It’s not like I get the same courtesy when you’re out late!”
“I’m busy, I can’t always be texting you!”
Excuses, I laugh and he looks at me like I’m crazy. “Busy what? Screwing other women-”
“Don’t be making shit up-”
“I’ve had people tell me that they see you with other women Harry! S’not a far stretch!”
That quiets him. Finally, he comes forward to stand inches away. “Y/N, c’mon. You and me...this is stupid. Sure I go out to party but I’m not-”
“Stop.” he was actually trying to talk his way out of this. And because I’d rather step in front of an oncoming train than cry in front of him, I head to the front door and walk out. I’d find someplace to crash today, but I wasn’t doing this.
***
“How’re you doing?” Janelle asks. I’d shown up at her doorstep and she set up her guest bed. She had plans so I spent most of my time burying myself in work, trying to get rid of all that angry energy pent up in me. Janelle had just come home.
“I’m just trying to move on. I don’t want to talk about him, I just don’t care at this point--I’m fed up!”
“As you should be,” she agrees. “Listen, I know we had a crazy night yesterday but I’m going out with some friends today and...maybe it’ll help you?”
I think about the killer headache this morning, but I also remember how good it felt to forget for a bit. I agree. Before I know it, Janelle’s found something that fits me and we’re back at a different club than the night before. Her friends are familiar faces but after a few drinks we’re all best friends. It feels great. Until I spot Harry’s face.
“That’s enough,” his face looms over mine as he pushes away the man I’m up against.
“What the fuck Harry...” I trail off as he pulls me away from the middle of the crowd. I try to pry his hand off but there’s too many people and he’s moving too quickly...and I’ve had a lot of drinks. “Let me go!” I say when we finally step away. We’re in what must be a private room. He seemed familiar with it--of course.
“So just because you heard I’m out and about some nights, you decide to come here and fuck around with random men?”
“Excuse me?” I stare at him, he was out of his mind. “I’m out having fun with my friends! I’m not here because of you.”
“Really? You come to the same place I come to all the time and dance with these strangers? And you’re drunk as fuck!”
“Since when did you care?” I ask. “Just leave me alone. You’ve been doing that perfectly fine the last few months.”
“I’m your bloody husband Y/N, you can’t just-”
“Then act like one!” I shout, and in the muffled quiet of the room with the bass thumping through it rings out. “I don’t need you! And you made it clear you don’t need me. These rings are a fucking joke, here-” I take mine off and throw it at him.
“You don’t mean it-”
“I do.” I give him a level stare, suddenly clear-headed. Maybe I’d process it later, but right now I was finally seeing what he’d become. He deserved to feel how I felt, and quite frankly, I didn’t give a fuck. I flip him with both hands, “Quite frankly Harry, you can suck my d-”
“Harry!” A shrill voice rings out from the entrance that now carries the loud beats of the dance floor, swallowing my words. “Liam told me you were here!”
I glance at the brunette in the doorway and back at him. I couldn’t even muster an eye roll; I had enough.
“Y/N!” Harry calls my name as I walk out.
“No it’s me, Becky?!” she tries to correct him. I can’t help but laugh as I make my way back to my friends with a drink in my hand, feeling free.
***
“Y/N, it’s Harry. I don’t know how it got this shite just please call me back. Just give me five minutes that’s all I n--message deleted”
“He’s moved on to the office phone then?” Janelle asks, her desk was beside mine so she’d heard him as I checked my messages. It was two weeks since that glorious night when I’d dumped Harry’s ass. Although a lot of my things were still at our house, I was just staying in a hotel right now while I figured things out. One thing I knew for sure though, I didn’t want to see him again.
“It’s pretty pathetic,” I say. It was also pathetic how long I’d stayed waiting around for us to be magically fixed. But that was something I was working on getting past.
“You’re glowing without him,” April says from where she’s getting her files together. “Haven’t you got that showing out east?”
“Yeah, oh god is that the time?” I rush to get my files in order. “I’ll catch up with you later-”
“We’re still getting drinks after?”
“Yes, drinks!” I call out as I leave the office and head down to the lobby. I don’t expect Harry there, and I barely have time for him as he comes up to keep my pace.
“Harry, I’ve got somewhere to be please leave me alone.”
“Y/N, wait just please listen to me.”
“No.”
“2 minutes!”
“Not even 1,” I spot my cab out front and head towards it. I’m about to get in but Harry holds the door. “Harry let go I’m going to be late.”
“Just let me talk to you, please!”
I finally look at him and he’s quite a sight. His hair is matted and without it’s usual bounce. He’s got a rough look and a 5 ‘o clock shadow.
“You had plenty of time to talk to me for months, you were too busy at the club. Sorry not sorry,” I tug at the door and he lets go, I don’t spare a backwards glance as we drive away.
One of the showings is successful, I manage to sell the family on the home and we set up a meeting to go over details at my office later in the week. I’ve got a bounce in my step as I return to the office. I tell the girls I’d meet them at the bar as I finalize my papers at the office. My bounce falters when I go head out after 5 to see Harry waiting outside the building.
“Y/N,” he calls out when he sees me. “I’m not going to leave until you talk to me.”
“That’s called stalking,” I say. A few people walking past us turn to glance at him and he notices. He moves to the inside lobby and asks me to follow. With a big sigh I do.
“I know what I did.” he begins.
“Congratulations,” I roll my eyes.
“No wait, I know what I did to you. And sorry can’t cover it. Just let me make it up to you, we have history and-”
“You don’t get it.” I stop his monologue from going any further. “I’m gonna be just fine. Without you. You didn’t care about our history until you couldn’t have me. I don’t know what happened to you Harry, but you’re not the man I fell in love with-”
“I know,” he says, tears of frustration coating his lashes. “I fucked up, I-I didn’t see what I had right in front of me and I just-”
“Let her slip away? Is that the best you can come up with?” I scoff. “You know what Harry? I’m done with this! Boy...bye.”
“Y/N just--” he grabs my arm before I can leave and pushes something cold into my palm. My wedding ring.
“I don’t want this,” I push it back in his hand.
“Please just take it--hold onto it,” he pushes it back into mine and closes my fingers over it. “I can’t...I can’t hold onto it just take it! You don’t even have to think about it-”
“Harry,” I soften my tone. He was desperate and even though some part of me thought it was about time he felt this type of way, my heart hurt a little. I didn’t want him to see that though so I just tuck the ring into the pocket of his button up and pat it. “Goodbye Harry.”
I walk away with my head held high even though he calls out to me. I walk the few blocks to where my friends are waiting and their warm smiles are enough to help me push the memory of Harry’s teary eyes, and the real history we did have once upon a time away. I was done with him, no longer thinking about him.
I just kept telling myself, I was rare like a gem and I had to see that. And maybe one day, someone else will too.
172 notes · View notes
maria-akira · 3 years
Text
good girls don't get used: michael langdon x fem! reader — PART 2
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—♡—
READ PART 1 HERE
summary: michael langdon, your ex, falls into a bet wherein he needs to (fake) date you. if he falls inlove again, he loses, and doesn't get the prize.
warnings: making out, pre-smut???, michael as a tiktok fuckboy, + me not proofreading this hahah sorry
italicized bold words are direct lyrics from the song :)
please excuse any errors. enjoy!
—♡—
It had been a few hours since Y/N arrived at home. She changed into an oversized shirt and a comfy pair of shorts. To be honest, she has never tutored anyone before, except for her baby brother Aaron. With Aaron it was just 1+1 or 2x3, you know? The basics.
"Mom, someone's coming over tonight!" She called out from upstairs,
"Who will?"
Y/N didn't know what to say. Her parents knew about Michael, and how they broke up. She didn't want her mom to know that it was him who would be coming over. Why hide it? She'll see him anyways.
"Michael! Michael Langdon!" Y/N went downstairs to finally face her mom.
"Wait, your ex?"
"Yeah.."
Her mom laughed, "Oh my, looks like something's gonna happen~" She said in a sing-song tone while she prepared dinner.
Y/N rolled her eyes, "Oh my goood mom! That was 2 years ago, he just asked if I could tutor him. Apparently, he's failing."
"He's what? Failing? Isn't he one of the top students in your batch?"
"Yeah, I honestly don't know what happened to hi—"
Ding Dong!
Oh my god, She felt her heart beating fast.
Y/N walked to the front door and opened it, and there he was. Michael Langdon in his grey sweatpants and black hoodie.
"Hey, Y/N." Michael greeted, giving her a smile.
Y/N looked him up and down,
"Hi." She gave him a sarcastic look and stepped out of the way, gesturing him to come in.
Y/N's mom squealed, "Oh my, Michael! Look how you've grown!" She squeezed him into a hug and it made Michael laugh.
Aaron came down the stairs to see what the fuss was about. When he saw Michael, he rushed towards him and hugged his thigh.
"Michaeeeelll!! You're here!" Aaron giggled
Aaron loved Michael a lot. When Y/N and Michael were still together, he would always play with him.
"Hey, slugger! Now you've grown alot too, huh?" Michael kneeled down to his height and ruffled his hair, "Yup! I'm a big boy now." Aaron said proudly with his chin up.
Slugger. That was the nickname Michael gave him.
"Is Michael staying over?" Aaron pouted and gave her puppy eyes.
Y/N panicked. How was she gonna explain?
"Well, he actually came over to study for school, but he—"
"Of course I'll stay over! Anything for you, slugger." Michael cut her off. Y/N widened her eyes, making a 'what the fuck are you doing?!?!' expression at him.
Y/N faked a cough, "Aaron, go stay with mom okay? Michael and I will be studying now."
Aaron whined and crossed his arms. "But I wanna play with Michaaael!!"
"You'll do that later. After all, he said that he'll be staying over." She looked over to Michael and gave him a sarcastic smile.
After a few moments of arguing with Aaron, Y/N and Michael finally went upstairs. "Your room changed alot." Michael said as he looked around her room for the first time in 2 years. Once Y/N shut the door, she stormed over to Michael.
"Langdon what the fuck was that down there?!?! I only allowed you to come over, not stay over! Where will you even sleep?!"
"In a bed, duh."
Y/N slapped his forehead, causing Michael to wince at the pain.
"Are you that stupid?! Sleep on the fucking floor!" She hid her face in her hands out of frustration, then lifting her head again. "You know what? Fuck it. I don't care anymore."
"So if you move negative four here, what will you get?" Y/N asked, pointing her pencil on the equation. It's now 8PM, Michael and her were studying the last subject for the day, which was Math.
Michael analyzed the problem, then wrote down the answer. "Fifty.. three?" He slid the paper to her direction. While Y/N was checking his solution, he received a message from Duncan.
Dunc 🖕🏻: how's tutoring going?
Michael: its fine ig, lmao im staying over 😴
Dunc 🖕🏻: yooo what?? where you gonna sleep?
Michael: beside her? idk im still gonna play video games with her brother so i guess i'll sleep beside her 😶
Michael: brb shes done checking my solution
"Michael," She called for his attention, He let out a hum in response. "Your solution is correct.. But to avoid confusion, change this into an arrow instead of an equal sign, because it isn't the final answer yet." Y/N pointed out his mistake and circled it with a mechanical pencil.
Michael smiled. despite this 'trying to get her trust back' thing, he thought that Y/N was adorable like this. Focused with academics. He admired her alot.
Y/N looked over at Michael, "Langdon, are you even listening?" She snapped her fingers in attempt to catch Michael's attention.
Michael went back to reality, "Yeah. I get it now, thanks Y/N." Michael got his paper back and saw all the check marks. While Michael was distracted with his paper, Y/N stood up and streched. "They're all correct?" He looked up at her and asked in fake disbelief. Y/N rolled her eyes, "Duh, what are all the check marks for, dimwit?" She furrowed her eye brows and made her way to the door.
She glanced over at the clock beside her mirror, it was already 8:15 PM. "Hey, we have to go down for dinner now." She looked over to him and opened the door. Michael stood up and made his way to the door, stopping by the mirror, "Damn, I'm hot." Michael said as he praised his reflection in the mirror. When Y/N heard this, she furrowed her eyebrows and looked at him.
"Yeah sure, maybe in a different planet." She insulted, playfully hitting his arm.
"Oh c'mon Y/N, you miss me." Michael leaned on the wall with the support of his arm. Y/N shut the door.
"What makes you say that, Langdon?" She crossed her arms and leaned against the door.
"I've seen the way you look at me, baby. Admit it, you miss me, you wanna kiss me, you wanna be mine all over again."
"Don't hit me with your 'say you miss me, say you wanna kiss me.' shit, Langdon. I'm not that stupid," Y/N pulled on the neckline of Michael's hoodie, signalling him to come closer. Now, their faces were a few centimeters apart.
"Let's face the facts here, Langdon. Actually? you want me." She pulled him even closer, her lips ghosting over his. Michael moved closer in attempt to kiss her, yet to no avail. Y/N smirked and pushed him away. "You know, you're better than that." She gave him a little tap on the cheek and left the room, slamming the door in his face.
Michael was speechless. Y/N did change, a lot.
"So what brings you here, Michael?" Y/N's father asked, eating a slice of steak that was on his plate. "I'm currently failing some of my classes and I asked Y/N if she could help me. Luckily, she agreed." Michael looked over to Y/N and gave her a smile. She kicks him under the table, causing him to flinch.
"Will you be staying over, Michael? It's getting late." Y/N's mother asked this time, "If that would be okay with you, Mrs. Y/L/N." Michael replied, looking over to Y/N again.
Well, let's say that everyone looked at Y/N after Michael said that.
The silence made Y/N glance at them, "Why are you all looking at me..?" She said in a confused tone, her mom shot her a 'is it okay if he sleeps in your room' look. Y/N sighed, "Fine, he'll sleep in my room." Now, everyone went back to what they were doing.
After dinner, Y/N's mom called up Michael's parents to inform them that he would be staying for the night.
Y/N was washing the dishes tonight, and of course Michael volunteered to help her.
"Why did you even volunteer? You hate washing dishes, Langdon." She said as she cleaned a dirty plate with the soap filled sponge.
"Oh c'mon, Y/N. Can't I change?" He replied, rinsing one of the dishes that Y/N cleaned.
Y/N scoffed, "You? Change?"
Michael elbowed her side, "Hey, I did change!"
"Whatever." She went back to what she was doing cleaned the rest of the dishes, ignoring Michael's statement.
After a few more dishes, her hair started to slip away from the loose ponytail she made earlier. Her hands were slippery and full of soap, if she were to wash her hands and fix her hair, then go back to washing the dishes, her hands would be wet again. Plus, the drying towel was on Michael's side. So she asked for his help.
"Michael," Her voice was soft. Softer than usual. "Yea?" Michael replied, still rinsing the dishes.
"Can you please tie my hair up? It's slipping away."
"Hold on." Michael shook the water off his hands and dried it using the towel beside him, while Y/N turned her back over to his direction. Michael removed the hair tie and bit on it. He started gathering her hair from the top, combing his fingers through her soft, silky hair. He was very gentle. After he gathered her hair, he removed the hair tie from his teeth and tied her hair, careful not to tug too hard.
Y/N turned around to face him, "Hm, maybe you did change," Michael was curious when she paused. "Because you used to be so aggressive when you tied my hair." She joked and finished off the dishes that were left.
It's now 11 pm. Michael is in Aaron's room playing video games, and Y/N is alone in her room, doing some extra school work that was due for next week.
Like any other Friday night, girls like Y/N's age would be out partying like there was no tomorrow. After that one time she was really drunk and a guy touched her inappropriately, she never went out partying again.
Once Y/N finished her school work, she decided to take a shower. She wanted to take advantage of Michael's absence and stay in the shower longer than usual. Like a typical teenage girl, she would blast music in the shower, dancing and singing like she had a whole audience to perform for.
Y/N wrapped a towel around her body and left the bathroom to get her clothes from the dresser. Little did she know, Michael was back from her brother's room.
"I see you still have that body, huh?" Michael smirked and looked her up and down. Y/N turned around to see Michael on her bed. Her instincts told her to scream and throw an object at him, so she did.
"What the fuck are you doing here?!"
"Chill, it's not like you haven't sent me your nudes before." Michael dodged whatever she threw at him and laughed.
"Yea, and I regret sending those to your ugly ass. If I could turn back time, I would've sent them to your hot bestfriend, Duncan was it?" She turned around again to get her clothes from the dresser. Michael walked over to her and grabbed her neck from behind,
"What did you fucking say?" He growled in her ear. She smirked and bat her eyelashes innocently at him.
"I said, I would've sent them to Duncan. You should set me up with him, hm?" Y/N knew what she was doing, "Aww, is little Mikey getting jealous?" She mocked in fake sympathy. She removed his hand from her neck, turned around to face him and gave him a pout. 
Michael was furious. What has gotten into him? He doesn't even love her. He just fell into a stupid bet just to fuck some girl's pussy after he fucks with her ex's feelings. But why does he feel like this? Like he needs to have Y/N only for himself?
Before Y/N went back to the bathroom to get dressed, she just had to get on Michael’s nerves again, as if she wasn’t already. At this point, she could literally see fire in his eyes. He was really mad. But why?
"Look at you, Mikey. You can't respond when you react." She giggled and gave him a quick nose boop as the cherry on top for her little act. But she wasn't getting away so fast. When she turned her back on him, Michael aggresively wrapped his hand around her neck and pulled her, securing an arm around her waist.
"Where do you think you're going, you little shit? You aren't getting away easily after that stunt." The grip on Y/N's throat slowly tightened. "W-Wh... Why are you so mah-d.. Huh?" She managed to choke out.
Michael left soft kisses against her neck, while slowly loosening the grip on her throat. "See, Mikey? You're the one who misses me." Y/N whimpered, using her free hand to pull on Michael's hair in hopes of prying him off, but he was stubborn. Y/N whispered in his ear, "Whatever it is you're trying to do, Langdon, I'll never give in." She pushed her elbow into his ribs, causing Michael to groan. Finally, Y/N goes back to her bathroom to get dressed.
Once she leaves, Michael punches the nearest wall in frustration. He hated rejection. The girls that he usually fucked with never turned him down, they always wanted more. Why wouldn't it work on Y/N?
Michael sat on the long side of her bed, still thinking about what happened earlier. He couldn't believe that she could play with him like that. It made him look like he was the desperate one, which he is.
He took out his phone to text Duncan about what happened.
Michael: yo dunc, something happened
Dunc 🖕🏻: what happened? slr i'm at a party
Michael: bro she's a tough little shit. i did the usual thing that i would do to another girl, she didn't give in at all. instead, she's playing with me.
Dunc 🖕🏻: lmao man step up your game, she isn't your usual girl
Michael: dumbass you think i'm not?
Dunc 🖕🏻: duh??? if you were actually stepping up your game then you would've fucked her there and then 🙄
Michael: whatever.
Once he heard her bathroom door open, he immediately hid his phone back in his pocket. He looked over his shoulder to see Y/N already dressed in her pajamas. Michael didn't know what to do. His angelic side says to 'go and say sorry', yet his devilish side says to 'try harder and fuck with her feelings even more.' Of course, it was obvious what is choice was.
Y/N plopped herself on the bed and grabbed her blanket that was near Michael. She then placed the blanket over her and locked eyes with him.
Michael crawled beside her and placed the blanket over him as well. They are a few inches apart. Y/N turned the TV on, clicking on Netflix. Though she tried her best to ignore Michael, she can't help but think about what happened earlier. She liked it. No, she loved it. She loved the fact that she was able to get on Michael's nerves, and how he reacted to it. It was hella attractive to her, and the smell of Michael's perfume wasn't helping her either.
Now, Y/N was watching some cartoon show that she loved. "Are you kidding? You still watch cartoons?" Michael complained, gesturing at the TV. "Yea? What about it? I bet you only watch porn." She shot back and pulled the blanket towards her, leaving Michael without it.
Michael laughed, "I just can't believe a girl like you would watch cartoons. I find it cute." He pulled the blanket towards him, sticking his tongue out to tease her.
A few minutes passed by and Michael was on his phone, scrolling on TikTok. The same sound that kept repeating for almost a minute caught Y/N's attention. Was he watching the same video?
Y/N paused the TV and looked over to Michael's direction, averting her gaze to his phone. She took a good look at the video. a shirtless boy with a gold chain, with LED lights in their room.
"You've been watching that video over and over again, Langdon. Do you like him or something?"
"Yea, I like myself."
Like myself? Oh my god, no.
"What do you mean..?" That can't be him in the video.
"That's me."
Y/N's mouth dropped, "Wha— huh? How? I mean, yeah.. but?"
Michael let out a laugh that he had been holding in, "But what? Look, I'll show you." He handed her his phone, which allowed Y/N to have a closer look of the video.
"So you're telling me you blew up on tiktok by thrusting a phone on your pelvis??" Y/N stared at the amount of likes, a fucking million.
"Uh, yeah? That's how TikTok works? Look at the comments." Michael tapped the comments icon and Y/N scrolled through it.
'yo im down bad 😫'
'can we keep him a secret pls'
'chill i have a bf..'
'break my back 🤪'
Y/N bursted out in laughter, "Oh my god, if only they knew." she gave his phone back and Michael looked at her with a puzzled look.
"Knew what?" He asked, "You couldn't even 'break my back' two years ago, Michael!" She said in between giggles. "That was two years ago, Y/N! Two fucking years. I was a virgin!" Michael defended himself, then immediately realizing what he said.
Y/N wasn't aware that she was Michael's first.
"Wait Y/N, the last part isn't tru—"
She smirked and grabbed her phone from wherever she left it. She opened Twitter and decided to tweet about what Michael said, just for fun.
just wanted to let yall know that @m_langdon admitted that 2 years ago he lost his virginity to me 🤩
"What are you typing and why are you smiling?" Michael asked with a hint of fear in his voice. He feared that Y/N would do something that would tear his reputation down.
Y/N gave him a mischievous grin, "Oh nothing, just tweeted about what you said."
Michael's face fell, and Y/N hit the tweet button.
"Did you twee—"
"Yeah, go check your Twitter. I tagged you too."
Michael shot her a slight glare and went to his Twitter.
Y/N's tweet already had 5 retweets, 14 likes, and 8 replies.
"You did not." Michael said, shocked at how she would do something like this. "Ooh sorry babe, I just did." She faked a pout and formed a letter 'L' with her hand.
Michael felt embarrassment fill him, he wanted to scream at her so bad. He never thought that she would go this far. She was never like this.
He took a deep breath, "Why did you tweet that?"
"And you have the audacity to ask why?"
"Delete that tweet, Y/N." His voice was demanding and dark.
"Or what?"
Michael slowly started to kneel on the bed and hover over her. "You don't want to know."
Y/N smirked and fixed her posture, "Infact, I'd like to know. Care to tell me?” 
Michael clearly wasn’t having any of her shit, he was more than angry. He wanted to release all of his frustrations, and he was gonna do that. 
He trapped her by placing a leg on each side of her left thigh. Surprisingly, Y/N did not shrink against the headboard of the bed. She remained in her place. Their faces are centimeters apart now, 
“Now what, Langdon? Just gonna stare at me? Pathetic shit.” She cupped his face and stroked his cheek mockingly, then dragging her thumb against his bottom lip. 
“Shut the fuck up.” Michael swatted her hand away and crashed his lips again hers. The kiss was so intense, Michael hasn’t kissed any girl like this, it was a foreign feeling for him, and especially for Y/N. Michael’s free hand started roaming throughout her body, tickling her soft flesh. Meanwhile, Y/N was tugging on Michael’s hoodie, “Take this off.” She pulled away from the kiss and gasped for air. Michael took off his hoodie and revealed his naked chest infront of her.
Y/N felt weak. She wanted to fight this feeling so bad, which was lust. But it was too late.
"Fuck me, Michael.." Y/N whimpered, ashamed of her current state. Michael ran his thumb over her bottom lip, "What was that? I didn't catch it." He pouted, teasing her. Y/N couldn't believe herself. She promised herself that she would never fall for any of Michael's antics, yet here she is— completely submitting to him.
Y/N cleared her throat, "Fuck me please.." Michael cocked his head to the side, amused. He was enjoying this. He loved it so much. He finally had Y/N where he wanted her to be, wrapped around his little finger.
Michael's lips ghosted against her cheek, his breath warming up her skin. "Gladly."
And it begins now.
—♡—
this took me like 3 weeks im sorry 😔 nonethelEEEESSSSS i enjoyed writing this despite some breakdowns here and there <3
tags (ily all sm <3): @kitwalker02 @angelicmichael @deademobitch @iheartfrogs101 @tatestripedsweater @mrs-march-ahs @no-mercy-bby @hawtghostgirl @vixemi @antichristwifey @bitchchatter @fallwiththesun @booksandfandomsarelife1 @roseelizabeth666 (im sorry if i missed anyone!!)
—♡—
373 notes · View notes
neoculturetravesty · 3 years
Text
We met in online class - Last Part
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Image adapted from here.
Pairing: Renjun x Reader Genre: College AU, romance, angst, fluff Warnings: Strong language Word Count: 3.4k
Navigation: Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 9 | Part 10 | You are on the Last Part
A/N: And so it comes to an end, and let me tell you guys, I am not okay 😔 This is going to be a bit of a longer A/N, so please bear with me. If you’d like to get straight to the story, I COMPLETELY UNDERSTAND, so feel free to click Keep Reading!
Lowkey, I had a bit of a meltdown as I typed the final words on this fic because I hadn’t realized how attached I had grown to the characters. This is the first time I wrote three different chapter openers before deciding on one, because I simply couldn’t believe it was goodbye after this.
These mofos had constantly been on my mind for the past two months and a half. I would spend most days thinking about where to take them and then bringing them to life at night, after my entire day was over. When I wasn’t writing, I’d make little notes about thoughts I had into the night about them so that I wouldn’t forget them when morning comes. 
This was my first ever (and as of right now, my only) chaptered fic. I had no idea parting with it would be as emotional as it was. When I think back to when I first received the prompt for this, I had never even imagined I could write Renjun, let alone a series. But there was something in the prompt that had gotten my wheels turning. And I am so immensely glad that it did. There were days when I thought “Oh man, what have I gotten myself into.” Some days, the story would just flow. Other days, I’d keep staring at the blinking cursor not knowing what to type. But when I did, I found my emotions so deeply connected with the characters. I was happy when they were happy. I was sad when they were sad. So, parting with them is very hard to say the least.
But through this journey, I got to experience the joy of reading all of your reviews and comments and honestly, it made it all worth it. THANK YOU to every single one of you that read this story and waited on it and laughed and cried with it. You have made my life better in more ways than you can imagine.
In this moment, I want to thank 🍙 anon, because it was their prompt that put me in this mess in the first place. And so, it is only fitting that I dedicate the final part to them 💛
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“Oh, we definitely need a picture together. How about here? I think this place would fit everyone.” Kim Doyoung looks about, finding a spot best suited for the photo he wanted.
“I think right there on the platform would be better. We could get everyone in two tiers.” his assistant suggests.
“You’re a genius. Let’s gather everyone. It’s not often that so many NCTU grads and students come to Midnight Arthouse,” Doyoung nods.
“How many of us are here, anyway?” Renjun muses. The assistant looks at her iPad, checking once again.
“I think there’s 23 of you. So, let’s definitely go for the platform.” she nods.
“Okay, then.” Doyoung claps his hands together once, “Gather everyone,” he says to no one in particular and walks ahead with purpose. Renjun and the assistant’s eyes meet and they smirk. Of course this was directed to the both of them. So, they set about to work.
As it would turn out, gathering 23 people from a charity event with art and food and drinks would be a bit of a task. But somehow, they manage to gather all alumni and current students on the platform in three tiers instead of two for a somewhat chaotic picture. There must’ve been something in the water at NCTU because none of it’s students could stand still for very long. They get maybe one decent picture and several in which someone or the other was moving or pulling a face.
His friends aside, looking around at the group, Renjun realized that he recognized nearly all of them. Yangyang and Hendery and the rest of their frat were here. As were the 127s, old and new. Renjun recognized them all, except maybe two boys, who didn’t seem to know a lot of the others either. When the pictures were done and the main events were over and the crowd had started to dissipate, Renjun finally walked over to the artwork to observe it up close.
Honestly speaking, watching the work with his own two eyes left no doubt in his mind that this artist deserved to be spotlighted like this. This work was in a league of its own. Watching it makes Renjun smile; because looking at it makes him think back to a few months ago when he was sitting in Kim Doyoung’s office, thinking of himself as some sort of a big shot. But the truth is, there was no way he had that caliber then, and there is no way he has that caliber now, though he was sure as hell working on it.
“This is the piece I lost the bid on.” Renjun hears a voice and he turns around to see Zhong Chenle’s father observing the art with him. Renjun bows politely and smiles under his mask,
“I mean, this is a remarkable piece. You have good taste.” Renjun acknowledges.
“What about you? Why isn’t any of your artwork displayed here?” he asks and for a while, Renjun smiles a bit nostalgically. He could’ve been here, had he made something for the Annuale. Had he just selfishly taken that shot. Then again, there would’ve been no real guarantees. Because Kim Doyoung was pretty particular in the people he chose, whether they were recommended by his family or not. Working with him closely in the last couple of months had taught Renjun that. It had also taught him how underdeveloped his skill was in the real world context.
“I guess I still have a long way to go.” Renjun replies humbly.
“Don’t we all?” Chenle’s father nods, “Are you working here at this establishment?” 
“Um, I… I suppose I am. I am Kim Doyoung’s apprentice. He is my mentor.” Renjun nods.
“So I might see your work here soon enough, eh?” Renjun assumes the kind man is smiling under his mask because his eyes seem to be making the same shape as Chenle’s do when he smiles. So Renjun grins back.
“I mean… if I work really hard, I might get to shoot my shot in the next Midnight Arthouse Annuale.” Renjun fantasizes.
“Or maybe you’d get lucky like this young artist,” he points his chin towards the artwork.
Renjun smiles, “I would credit her luck, too if I hadn’t seen her work. But her talent is… it kinda speaks for itself.”
“Oh, no, you should definitely credit her luck. Talent isn’t enough. The stars have to align. Luck, talent, the right place, the right time. It all has to come together.” he says nodding. 
Renjun considers his words. They seem to be coming from the wisdom of experience. 
What if Renjun hadn’t received the phone call about his grandma back then? Well, then he probably would’ve made something lackluster and gotten rejected. Working with Kim Doyoung has taught him as much. It didn’t matter who had put a word in for him. At the end of the day, his work had to be outclass.
What if he had received the phone call and then still had enough time to submit something for the Annuale? Then he still probably wouldn’t have because… well, because of you.
What if he had gone ahead, regardless of you or his grandma and just made something and submitted it? Then he still would’ve been rejected. Because the truth of the matter is, he just didn’t have the caliber that artists associated with Midnight Arthouse did.
In that sense, Renjun supposes everything was in fact happening at the right place and right time now. Doyoung was mentoring him and he was getting better by the day. The stars were aligning for him. He knew it in his heart.
“Then I would wish that it all comes together for me, too.” Renjun says.
“When it does, young man, I’ll be the first one to bid on your work.” he says and Renjun doesn’t even have the time to react when he feels a presence breeze in his direction and invade his personal space.
Renjun doesn’t even have to look up to know who it is. He can tell by the way this body fits perfectly into his side. He can tell by how naturally his own body responds and just puts his arm around it’s waist.
“Oh man, I missed all of it, didn’t I?” you lament, as you loop your arms around his neck from the side instead of a hello.
“Not all of it. The guys just left but your brother and his friends are still here. Besides, you had work.” Renjun turns his head and looks into your eyes to reassure you. “Y/N, this is Chenle’s father.”
“Oh, hello!” you say cheerfully and respectfully bow and give you greetings. “It is so nice to meet you. Chenle looks just like you!”
“Yes, I’ve been told I’m a more handsome version of him,” he smiles then turns to Renjun, “And who might this young lady be?”
“This is my girlfriend, Y/N. She goes to NCTU with us.” Renjun introduces you and you bow again. Oh, the thrill he got every time he got to introduce you as his girlfriend. Fuck, he’s pretty sure he’d never tire of it, even if it had just been a few months. The serotonin boost in his veins is strong and he gets the urge to squeeze you and hold you forever.
“Oh, that’s very nice. Come have a meal with us before we have to catch a plane back home, okay?” Chenle’s father invites the two of you. 
“Oh, I would love to!” you say in your chipper tone before your eyes start darting around “I’m going to have to excuse myself for a little bit, I just wanna say hi to my brother.” you say and you politely bow before you start moving away.
“Babe, hang on…” Renjun says, holding you back by your hand. He brings his fingers delicately to the bridge of your nose and softly pinches down the mask over it so it sits more snugly on you. “There, it’s much safer now.” Renjun nods and watches the affectionate smile your eyes give before you move away. You looked so pretty today, even if you were just coming back from a four-hour internship. You were easily the most beautiful girl in this room, though Renjun suspected that you’d be the most beautiful girl in any room you entered. 
Albeit sometimes, Renjun had to wonder if your talent or your beauty was greater. Because you had become the only junior in NCTU to land an internship at the SMK Trainee Drive. And now that you were a senior, you were somehow managing to keep your grades up alongside it. 
Renjun, on the other hand, would find himself struggling with balancing his apprenticeship with his school work. So he knew firsthand how your discipline was something else altogether. Recently though, he had experienced a rise in his grades because you had been taking him on so many study dates that your organizational skills and motivation had started to rub off on him.
Renjun walks around the studio and the party and feels like it’s been too long till you’re finally back by his side. 
“Love in the Time of Corona,” you read the title of an art piece displayed in front of you. “That was supposed to be our thing.”
Renjun laughs and has no qualms in looping his arms around your waist and finally pulling you into himself.
“I guess we should’ve realized then how un-novel the idea would become in a few months.” he comments. 
“Un-novel is not a word, Huang Renjun.” you narrow your eyes at him.
Renjun laughs. “It is now,” he says and lets out a long exhale, “I missed you today.” he complains, though he looks down at you with warmth.
“Well, you’ve got me now. And you have me for the entire weekend.” you reassure him, your palms on his chest.
“Mhmm.” Renjun smiles and he wants to lean in to kiss you. But Kim Doyoung specifically had people assigned to walk around and make sure that everyone had their masks on when inside. “Also, we already have a thing.” he reminds you and winks.
You laugh, and say “I guess we do,” then let out a happy sigh as your eyes avert from his for a moment, taking in your surroundings. “Our Couple Thing should give you some ideas on what you can make when your work is displayed here in the 2022 Annuale. I won’t be late to that, I promise. I’ll take a day off from everything else in my life.”
Renjun's heart grows warmer still, and he’s sure his eyes reflect what he feels, “How can you be so sure my work will be displayed in the 2022 Annuale?”
“I don’t know, Huang Renjun. I just have a feeling about you.” you say and Renjun can see you smile even if your lips are covered by a mask. Your eyes always smiled before your mouth did, anyway.
“Y/N L/N, I have a feeling about you, too.” he retorts. 
“And what feeling would that be?” you raise an eyebrow.
“It’s a secret.” he says, but now he sees your pout, even if he can’t see your mouth because your cheeks have puffed up over the mask. It makes him laugh.
“You’re no fun.” you protest.
“I’ll tell you once we get out of here.” Renjun offers.
“Well, I’m ready to leave.” you jut your chin up. Renjun grins and offers you his arm. You grab it with your entire body and the two of you start walking out together.
You had plans for the weekend, after all. And Renjun was determined to keep you all to himself for once, with no one else demanding your time. Not your internship, not your assignments, not any of your friends, and especially not Lee fucking Donghyuck. He was finally going to take you away where it could just be you and him and nobody else.
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This moment felt way too surreal to Renjun.
The campfire had simmered down from a glorious roar to a comfortable burn, giving off just enough heat in the cool of an early winter evening. The sky was in it’s fading moments, where the pink of the light was slowly turning to violets and the violets were slowly merging into darks. 
Renjun remembered suggesting to you all that time ago that maybe you could go somewhere together. But now that he was here, he hadn’t imagined that the moment would feel as surreal as it did. 
Because now the two of you are sitting in front of your tent by the fire, entwined in one another. You’re sitting between his legs, arms around his neck, nuzzling your cheek inside his padded jacket while he supports your head on his arm and kisses you.
He’s holding you in his arms and kissing you and everything seems so perfect that for a moment, he has to pull away to watch your face and wonder if all of this was real. And though there is a gentle smile on your face, you’re not opening your eyes much. Because you know full well that Renjun’s lips would be back on yours in no time. So you play with his hair as they fall to his forehead and when he kisses you again, you press up into him so he would wrap his arms around you and hold you tighter. He does and he rubs his hands up and down your back and attempts to close his jacket around you.
“Are you cold?” he asks lovingly. You shake your head.
“No. I just want to crawl inside you.” you say, like it’s the most logical thing to be said.
“Creepy.” Renjun remarks but holds you closer still.
“You should be happy you haven’t seen my collection of your hair clippings.” you quip as you nip into the skin of his neck.
“Oh, sweet. That rivals all your used tissues I’ve kept in my shrine at home.”
“Aww, you shouldn’t have.” you coo at him and then lean up to kiss him some more and he laughs. But soon, he pushes the arm that you were using like a pillow up so your face would be closer to his and he could kiss you as deeply as he was truly craving. 
The two of you keep kissing like that till the sky is dark. It was an odd sort of trance, being so lost in one another that neither of you cared about what time it was or how long you had been sitting here, wrapped up in one another. Your phones were zipped away in your bags and you hadn’t checked them even once since you had parked your camping van and set up your tent. It was a slow, peaceful sort of bliss, just sitting by the fire and kissing and kissing with nothing else on your minds but being here like this with one another.
“Renjun?” you say, your voice sounding like it was returning from a deep thought.
“Hmm?” Renjun asks as he combs your hair away from your pretty face.
“You know, I learnt today that a cactus can live anywhere between 10 and 200 years.” you tell him, idly tracing the birthmark on the back of his hand.
Renjun leans in and presses long into your lips. “Yeah?” he replies and watches your face. It seemed hazily focused, like it was trying to catch onto a faraway thought.
“I also learnt that it can take up to 30 years for a cactus to bear flowers.” you say in an introspective, wistful tone.
Renjun looks away to hide his smile. Oh God, you were so cute. “Yeah?” he says again, but it’s getting more and more difficult to keep a serious face.
“Sometimes, a cactus doesn’t flower at all.” you say and then you turn your head to look at him like you’ve resurfaced from your thoughts and are now in the moment. Renjun’s grin grows wider. “Renjunnn…” you whine and so he has no choice but to tenderly hold your cheeks in his palms and stroke your hair.
“What?” he chuckles.
“You said you’d think you’re worthy of my forgiveness when the cactus bears flowers.” you whine again and Renjun has to plant a loving kiss to your forehead.
“Is that what I said?” he chuckles some more and then leans in to kiss the anxious realization away from your lips. 
“Renjun.” you pout and Renjun laughs and takes his beautiful, whiny, kindhearted girlfriend in his arms and hopes that his hold could chase away all the worries from her pretty, brilliant mind.
He kisses you because his heart can’t bear it any longer. How did he manage to hold a heart like yours in his hand?
Renjun feels an indescribable amount of happiness. Like he wasn’t sure that you were really here with him, in his arms, all for him to hold, with no worry or burden afflicting him. The happiness is so immense and so incredible and so heavy that for a moment, he feels it suffocating him. He wonders if he deserved this kind of happiness.
But right in the next moment, he stops himself. He knew how easy it was to relapse into those tempting, lonesome thoughts. But if there was anything that therapy was teaching him, it was that of course he deserved happiness. 
Though right now, holding you in his arms, this happiness was choking him. He felt like his heart was swelling and pressing against his lungs and his chest couldn’t bear it and he could no longer breathe. 
“Y/N…” he exhales, holding you back so he can look at your face and you could look up into his. He pauses to gather another breath. Then, he just says it. “I love you.”
And doing so does the trick. He feels his chest slowly getting lighter, because this is what it had been bursting with. Now, he’s told you. Now, it can be unburdened.
You look up at him and there is nothing but a sparkle in your eye, and tenderness in your smile. For a while, you say nothing, just looking upon his eyes like that. “Thank you.” you finally whisper back at him.
Renjun pauses for a moment. But then, he relaxes. This was okay. You didn’t have to say it back right away. Renjun was ready to give you as much time as you needed. So he presses his lips into your forehead once again till he feels you laughing against him. He pulls back in confusion and you grab at the lapel of his parka.
“Huang Renjun…” you say and he looks back at you with uncertainty, “... I love you, too.”
And Renjun can’t help it if he kisses you too hard. He can’t help it that he’s squeezing you too tight. He wouldn’t care if the night brightens back into morning and the morning fades back into night. He was going to hold you just like this for the rest of his life. 
So he lays you down and kisses you deeper, like he wanted to make up for all the time he had lost. All the time in his life when he hadn’t known you. All the time he had known you and didn’t let himself have you. He was going to make up for it all. And as he zips the tent up and shields you from the rest of the world, he wonders if he could spend all of his days just like this. Holding you and loving you and knowing that you loved him back; and if he could, today was a damn good day to start.
The fire slows to a simmer till all that’s left are embers that keep being carried away by the breeze. But the two of you remain inside, in your own world, happy that you had found one another, happy that you could finally have one another. Happy that you could hold one another and say that you loved each other and have nothing in the world hold you back, not now, not ever.
You were Y/N and Renjun, Renjun and Y/N, two names that were forever intertwined because that’s how people would call you now. You were the couple that belonged so perfectly with one another that people would wonder if you’d been together for years. And any time someone with a burning curiosity would come up to you and ask,
“So, where did you guys meet?” you would just look at one another, smile and say, “Well, we met in online class.”
~THE END
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