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sundrop-writes · 2 months

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Careful - Chapter Two

(Dad)Spencer Reid x (Mom)Fem!Reader

Chapter Two: Liar

Why should I deny what's all at once, so crystal clear?

Summary:

Spencer is eager to talk to you - to find out if your son is actually his. But there are more important matters at hand, like the fact that you might be the next target of a serial killer who is actively stalking single mothers.

The two of you get locked in a battle of wills when you stubbornly refuse his protection and Spencer remains determined to keep you safe.

Dad!Spencer Reid x Mom!Fem!Reader. Exes to Lovers. Angst and Smut.

Word Count: 8,900

Criminal Minds Masterlist | AO3 Link | Series Masterlist

Detailed warnings and author's notes below the cut.

Warnings: again, general warnings for a Criminal Minds episode - mentions of killing/murder, mentions of the reader being a target for a killer; mentions of the reader buying and using a vibrator (does not take place during the fic, more so mentioned as the reality of the ‘sex life’ of a single mom); the reader and Spencer parted on very bad terms (but the details of the situation are not yet revealed); the reader is very angry towards Spencer; the reader and Spencer argue; the reader is in denial that she is the target of a killer; there is some mention of Sebastian having similar hair to Spencer - but I don’t want that to describe or exclude the reader’s race because in the next chapter, there is a mention of Sebastian having the reader’s skin tone; mention of the reader ‘shoving’ Spencer out of anger (not hard enough to cause harm); mention of the reader owning a gun (registered with gun training) as a form of self defense; mention of the reader character celebrating a birthday - but there is no mentions of specific dates or months when the fic is set, so you can easily imagine that this takes place around your birthday (aside from mentions of holidays or seasonal weather); mentions of JJ x Will; JJ talks about her trauma regarding dogs after being attacked in 2x15; this ends in another flashback, this time including flashback sex (smut); Spencer cuts off foreplay to give the reader a birthday present - mentions of heated kissing and some groping; Spencer calls the reader ‘Princess’ (not during sex - in the context of ‘I am here to serve you like royalty’); the smut basically consists of Spencer eating the reader out. And I think that’s it for this chapter.

A/N: Okay so something I did not intend to happen - a lot of this chapter is from JJ's perspective. It just naturally started happening while I was writing it, and it was really interesting to me to write about Spencer and the reader's relationship through her eyes (especially to keep the conflict between them vague to the audience, because JJ doesn't know the details of what happened), and it's not something I did intentionally, but I really loved how it shaped the chapter, so I kept it in. Also, I really wanted to include a lot of JJ x Spencer friendship and comfort moments in the fic because (as a lot of people in the fandom have discussed) - the writers love to have the characters say that JJ and Spencer are best friends, but they don't often show it. They just show a lot of conflict between them. So I wanted to show the potential of their friendship. And I had a lot of fun exploring that. So - I hope you guys enjoy the second chapter, and definitely hope to see you come back for chapter three!!!

...

When you heard someone knock on your door, you thought it was a delivery.

You had ordered Sebastian some new educational coloring books, and some new CDs with Mozart concertos to fall asleep to, because he was getting bored of his current ones. You often felt like you couldn’t keep up with him - Sebastian was so damn smart, and you always tried to provide him with the best resources to learn. Even if he was getting to a point where he was asking for high school level chemistry text books and actually seemed to understand the material in them and you were confused about how he could comprehend any of it.

The package also could have been the new vibrator you had ordered. You weren’t sure if that package was small enough to be left in the mailbox or not. You had to roll your eyes when you thought about how pathetic your sex life had been since having Sebastian. But you couldn’t risk bringing random men through the house just for sex when you had Seb around. So battery power and smut novels, it was.

“Sorry!”

You called out, hoping the delivery person would wait, as you raced to get to the door. You hoped they wouldn’t just slip one of those ‘failed to deliver’ notes into your door handle and force you to run an extra errand with a kid under your arm. You tripped over a toy truck and cursed yourself for procrastinating cleaning up (again).

“Sorry, I almost didn’t hear you. I was-”

‘I was in my office, in the back of the house.’

The sentence died off on your tongue when you finally fumbled the door open - your mouth going numb from shock when you saw him.

Spencer Reid.

The father of your child, the man you had once loved.

Your heart raced inside your chest, your body so overwhelmed so quickly that you couldn’t even decide on an emotion.

Happiness. Joy. Lust. Longing. Sadness. Relief.

Shock.

You lingered on shock for a while as you stared at him, your eyes locked on the sight of him - wondering what the hell he was doing standing on your porch. How did he know where you lived? Why was he here?

Was he here because of Sebastian? Was he angry? He had to be angry that you hadn’t told him about Sebastian for all of these years. He had to be angry that you had given birth to his child and not told him about it.

You flickered back to lust for a moment as your eyes traced over him.

He looked good.

Somehow, he had grown up so much in just four years. He had gone from a gangly, boyish man to a full blown man. But he was somehow still so much the same. His hair had grown out a lot since you had last seen him - instead of the neatly combed, short cut you had last seen him with, it was downright wild. The chocolate brown locks were sprawling out into the thick curls that you had come to see sprouting from your own son’s head. It wasn’t a look that you were used to on Spencer, but it looked damn good on him.

He was wearing his usual leather messenger bag - probably the exact same one from years ago. And he clearly had the same dress sense, but these clothes in particular made you want to jump his bones. A lavender cardigan that complimented his skin tone so well - and his usual button up shirt and tie, along with his usual gray slacks.

You desperately wanted to blame the sting of attraction that you felt for him on the recent lack of male suitors in your life; the fact that you hadn’t gotten laid in a long time. But you knew it was something else, too. Your previous attraction to him - the fact that because you had slept with Spencer before, you could still feel the ghost of his hands and tongue on your body.

How did he look so good?

He made you feel like a slob in your casual ‘work from home on a random Tuesday’ Mom clothes. If it had been your choice, he definitely wouldn’t be seeing you for the first time in years while you were wearing jeans and a sweatshirt that you were sure had raspberry juice stained on it somewhere, and eyeliner that you had slopped in between traffic lights in the car that morning.

(You hated it.)

“Y/N,”

He finally broke the silence, speaking your name in that honey-sweet way.

Unfortunately, it brought you rocketing back to that night all those years ago. Your stomach dropped, and you felt like you were standing in that apartment all over again, tears in your eyes as you faced down the crashing reality that the best relationship you ever had in your life was over.

This chased out that tiny splash of lust and brought on a whole new wave of confusing emotions.

Anger. Rage. Sadness. Bitterness. More longing. Regret.

Like your brain was a spin wheel, it whirled around for a few hectic moments, and then - you landed somewhere between anger and pure rage.

And that was when you finally spoke.

“Spencer Reid.” You hissed out his name like it was pure venom, your neck aching as the blood pumped hard through your aorta.

Immediately, Spencer’s features fell from looking at you with nostalgic fondness, and fear took over his face.

“What the hell are you doing here?” You asked fiercely, this question rocketing back to the forefront of your mind.

Spencer opened his mouth, seemingly to answer this question, and the rage pumped harder in your system. You found that suddenly, you didn’t want to hear whatever it was that he had to say.

You stepped through the door, easily stepping into his personal space as you came onto the porch. Without even thinking, you gave him a hard shove in the middle of his chest as you spoke your next words - much louder than you intended.

“What the hell is wrong with you?” You screeched.

You let your emotions carry your actions before any sense of logic or common decency could kick in. It was resentment and heartache that you had locked away four years ago - and apparently, it had been aging like wine, only becoming more potent with time.

“You think that you can just magically show up in my life again after I specifically told you not to contact me?” You screamed. “Do you think that order has a fucking expiration date on it?”

You gave him another hard shove. Perhaps expecting to prompt an answer out of him, or wanting to shove him off the porch entirely and get him out of your life once again. Which of those it was, even you weren’t sure.

Spencer just looked at you with wide-eyed shock. Clearly, for once in his life, at a loss for words.

“You better have a good fucking reason for showing up here!” You screeched, your voice becoming so loud that it wore out your throat.

“Look, Y/N, I-” He stuttered out.

“Don’t say my name.” You hissed, cutting him off. “Don’t say my name like we’re friends.”

You glared at him, crossing your arms over your chest, and Spencer shoved his hands into his pockets, now finding himself utterly speechless.

He definitely was not expecting this kind of reception.

The two of you became locked in an icy staring contest, neither of you speaking. Spencer found his throat too dry, and for once, his head far too empty. You were simply too angry and too stubborn to speak in those moments.

This stalemate was only broken up when JJ walked around the corner.

“Spence, Hotch just told me that the first woman doesn’t even match the-”

“JJ!” You cried out her name happily, your entire demeanor changing when you saw her.

She grinned, completely forgetting whatever news she had to report to Reid as you practically flew off the porch and ran to meet her. JJ eagerly opened her arms to hug you, and you squeezed her with all the warmth and kindness of an old friend.

Spencer felt a pang of jealousy that he wasn’t being greeted with as much affection. He knew that the last argument between the two of you had been bad, but he didn’t know it had left such a distinct impression on you. He didn’t know it had been enough to make you hate him.

When you pulled away from JJ, you looked between her and Spencer, and then it suddenly struck you.

If Spencer wasn’t here alone, that meant this wasn’t personal. He wasn’t just here to see you over some lost love, or - maybe he didn’t know about Sebastian at all. You felt a pang of guilt twist your gut because of that.

“What - what are you guys doing here?” You asked, now entirely confused, directing the question toward JJ.

JJ looked toward Spencer, and according to his ill-concealed frown, his reunion with you had not gone well. She doubted that you would take the news that you were possibly being hunted by a killer well on top of that.

“Is it alright if we come inside?” JJ asked, her voice tentative and soft. It was the same voice she usually used with victims and their families.

“Yeah.” You said, knowing there must be something big that you were missing, and hoping that you would be filled in soon enough. “I’ll put some coffee on.”

You walked back up the few steps of the porch and breezed right past Reid. You didn’t even spare a glance in his direction as you went back in through the open front door, leaving it open for the two of them with the expectation that they would close it behind themselves.

“So - I take it things didn’t go well?” JJ whispered to Spencer as she moved up onto the porch.

“Not quite.” Spencer mumbled in return before moving into the house, waiting for her to follow.

This made JJ even more curious about what had gone down between you and Spencer all those years ago.

What could have possibly made you so cold and distant toward him?

But she couldn’t just come out and ask. They had a job to do. They were there to ensure your safety against a man who had already killed five women and orphaned five children.

JJ walked into the house and closed the door behind her. She wasn’t surprised that she nearly tripped over a plastic toy truck in the entryway. Even though your son didn’t seem to be here (it was far too quiet for a small boy to be around), this was definitely a house where a child lived.

The first space that was visible to her eye - the living room, was clearly a space that belonged to a young child. There was a large, colorful play mat underneath the coffee table, and a few toys scattered over across the floor, showing that he clearly liked to have hands on play. In the corner, there was a child-sized desk with a small chair, which seemed to be surrounded by art supplies, and advanced textbooks? Some of them opened and were dotted with bright, colorful stickers. One glance told JJ that the reading material very advanced for his age clearly belonged to him.

So he very likely was Spencer’s son.

She wasn’t sure why, but that did bring a cluster of joy through her. Likely because she knew he would be so excited to have a child of his own.

JJ couldn’t help but to notice that many of the toys were Paw Patrol themed - it was a favorite show of Henry’s, too. In the back of her mind, she wondered if your son and Henry might be friends.

“Ugh, I’m so sorry.” You huffed, rushing around with your arms half full of toys now - distracted from getting the coffee, as you had mentioned. You were clearly rushing to pick up some of the mess now that you had realized how it appeared in the eyes of your ‘guests’. “All the - stuff.”

You hesitated to say ‘toys’. Clearly, you didn’t want to bring up the subject of your son, even though the evidence of him was so visible all around. You didn’t want to give Spencer the smallest opening to start asking questions about him. It was something you wanted to avoid speaking about for as long as possible.

Spencer looked at you with a mournful look on his face as you dodged around him, purposefully avoiding eye contact while you picked up a coloring book and a handful of crayons off the couch. You still refused to look his way at all as you rushed off to stash the items away somewhere.

Clearly, he wanted to ask you more about your son, and simply ask that penultimate question: was he the father?

But now wasn’t the right time.

“It’s alright.” JJ assured you. “You can just come sit down. We really need to talk to you.”

You heaved out a sigh, defeated in your effort to clean up, and then came back from one of the other rooms. (JJ could only assume you had stashed the toys in a playroom or a closet, because much like her own home, all areas had become a domain for toys and playtime). You motioned for them to sit on the couch, and you scooted over a rocking chair from the other side of the room to sit in front of them, blocking the shut-off TV on the other side.

“So, what is it?” You asked, clearly eager and curious to know what they were doing in your home - why they had contacted you now after so many years apart.

JJ and Spencer exchanged a look, and with a gentle nod from him, JJ took the lead.

“Well, um… there’s no easy way to say this, but we believe that you might be in danger.” She told you, introducing the topic gently, while wanting to be honest and direct. “Perhaps you’ve seen it on the news? But if you haven’t… several single mothers have been killed in the area recently, and we have reason to believe that you might be the killer’s next target.”

You looked at her, entirely observant, quietly taking in her words. Your face was still and expressionless, and JJ was unsure if you were going to take this calmly and logically - if you were going to panic after you had fully absorbed the news, if you were going to cry.

After a moment of silence - you burst out laughing. Your laughter was harsh and nervous, a sound that cut through the air like the rip of a chainsaw. Clearly, it was the stark opposite of someone taking the news with tears.

“Oh my god.” You sighed, taking a breath from the non-humorous laughter. “You know that you didn’t have to make up some excuse just to come and see me, right?”

Spencer’s face curled into a deep frown. He was upset that you weren’t taking this seriously. JJ found herself in shock. Usually when people found out they were potentially on the radar of a killer, they were paranoid, afraid, questioning why.

But it was very rare to see denial.

She did take notice of the fact that you didn’t immediately ask about what kind of evidence or reasoning they had to believe that you were the killer’s next target. Perhaps if your brain let you assess that reasoning for yourself and found it to be valid, then fear would take over. And you couldn’t let that happen. So this laughter, this posturing and not taking things seriously - it was an unconscious way to protect yourself from that fear.

But JJ could only theorize about that.

“I did miss you, JJ.” You said, very pointedly looking at her while you said it. “But you could have just sent me an email or something.”

You continued avoiding Spencer’s harsh gaze as he bored holes into the side of your face with his intense, intrusive eyes.

“Look, this is serious-” Spencer began, and you cut him off.

“Okay.” You shrugged. “Let’s say for argument’s sake that there is someone trying to kill me,”

You spoke of this lightly, the words entirely condescending on your lips, as though Spencer’s theory was entirely wild and imaginative to begin with.

JJ saw the movement in his jaw as he grinded his teeth out of the corner of her eye, and she was surprised that he let you continue.

“I have an alarm system that I set every night before I go to bed.” You informed them. “I am a proud gun owner. I have a registered revolver that I keep in a lock box beside my bed and I renew my gun training every single spring.” You told them, not seeming the least bit worried at the idea of a killer hunting you down. “If someone wants to kill me, let them try. I’m sure you guys have much better ways to spend your time than sitting around here, chatting with me when there are people out there, actually in danger. People who probably need your help.”

You said this, trying to dismiss them. And then you moved to get up from your seat, looking to escape the conversation entirely. But once again, Spencer stopped you.

“That’s it?” He fired back, entirely indignant, standing from his place on the couch.

This caused you to roll your eyes and let out a hiss, your lungs deflating like an annoyed balloon as you paused in the middle of the room.

“Yes, that’s it.” You groaned back. “Look, I know it’s your job to see problems everywhere, but-”

“It’s my job to protect people.” Spencer replied, cutting you off. “And-”

“Funny!” You scoffed, your voice escalating in volume. It had turned into a full-blown argument now - you were entirely uncaring that JJ was there to witness it; Spencer was locked in your sight like the crosshairs of a scope, and you were ready to fire. “You give a shit about ‘protecting’ me now, but what the fuck happened four years ago?”

You glared harshly at Spencer, and he locked his jaw, staring right back. It turned into a poisonous silence as neither of you spoke - he didn’t have a good answer for this question. And it made JJ all the more horribly curious about what had happened between the two of you. But she didn’t need to be a psychic to sense that the two of you needed some privacy.

“Do… do you mind if I go get myself a glass of water?” She asked, tentatively standing up from her place on the couch.

“I’ll get it.” You huffed out, moving to leave the room.

“It’s okay.” JJ told you. “I can get it for myself. Just point me in the right direction.”

You motioned toward the kitchen and JJ left, and she heard Spencer hiss out something about you being stubborn, which turned into another cluster of voices. The argument turned even more personal and sour now that the both of you didn’t have a witness.

When JJ made her way into the kitchen, she was happy to see that your backyard was full of toys. A pair of sliding glass doors let her peek out to see a colorful swing set and a large playhouse, and a scattering of other toys meant that your son obviously spent a lot of time outside. She smiled to herself, trying to ignore the rising, angered sound of voices from the other room as she found a glass in one of the cabinets. When she moved to the refrigerator’s water dispenser, something along the way caught her eye.

A vase of fresh flowers was sitting on the counter.

White carnations.

It made her stomach churn ominously. It felt too perfect to be a coincidence.

She abandoned her half-full glass and grabbed the vase, walking back to the living room with it.

“You just can’t accept help from anybody, can you? How can you not understand that your life is in danger here? This man is not going to stop until-” Spencer ranted on.

He was still trying to convince you to take the threat seriously - but you were still boiling with rage over the past, blind to anything else.

“I can’t accept anyone’s help?” You scoffed, crowding into his personal space to hiss the words closer to him. “That is so rich coming from someone who-”

JJ cleared her throat loudly, cutting you off.

“Spence.” She got his attention from the intense gaze he was keeping on you - anger hot in his eyes even though he was staring heavily at your lips.

When Spencer looked over and saw the vase in JJ’s hands, his entire face shifted in a blink. His expression went from tight-knit anger and annoyance to ‘shit-your-pants’ worry. The danger went from being theoretical to being very real in that moment.

“Where did these flowers come from?” Spencer asked.

“What?” You gaped, so entirely confused.

“Where did you get the flowers?” He asked, rephrasing the question, his tone more urgent and demanding now.

“Why does that matter?” You replied, exasperated. You didn’t see how it was at all relevant.

“All of the women who were killed received these exact same kind of flowers within days of their death.” JJ told you. “Do you have any idea who sent them?”

“I thought my mother did.” You shrugged. “There was no name on the card. It just said ‘Happy Birthday’. She didn’t get to see me in person for my birthday, she’s traveling right now. She’s one of the only people who would send me flowers for my birthday.”

“Yes, but your mother knows that your favorite flowers are lavender and baby’s breath. Why would she send these?” Spencer replied.

Naturally, he remembered your favorite flowers.

You couldn’t get stuck on that, though. Instead, you pondered the question he posed.

Why would your mother send you white carnations without even signing the card?

It wasn’t something you had thought about. At the time, you had just thought it was considerate, and sweet. When you had called her to thank her for the flowers, you had gotten her voicemail. You had left her a message thanking her. She was away on a singles cruise with shoddy reception and she hadn’t gotten back to you yet.

“They’re just flowers.” You said, letting out another nervous chuckle - but your voice broke over this one.

Obviously the reality of things was truly starting to set in with you.

“We need to set up protective custody for you.” Spencer said, taking out his phone in order to get this done.

“No!” You snapped. “I am not having some random cops follow me around because you think I might be in danger.” You hissed angrily.

Spencer paused and stared you down, debating if he was going to go against your wishes or not, his phone still in hand.

JJ hated the look in Spencer’s eyes. That deep, bitter fear. Whatever had happened between the two of you, there was still enough care lingering there that he would fight for you no matter what. He was terrified for you. He wasn’t going to let you meet the same fate as the other victims. She knew he wasn’t going to let this go.

JJ put the vase down on the coffee table, and turned to you.

“It doesn’t have to be random cops. We can stay with you, in order to-” She started to explain, only to be disrupted by the digital ringtone of your home phone echoing through the house.

You rushed to grab the phone, and JJ heard some of the quiet conversation from you on one end.

“Yeah, okay. Yeah, I’ll be there soon. It’s no problem. Thank you so much. Yeah, twenty minutes. Bye.”

You hung up and then rushed back into the living room - and before either of them could speak further on the matter, you rushed past them. You went to the entryway, taking off your slippers to exchange them for sneakers.

“Look, guys, I would love to stay and hang out, but I have somewhere important to be.” You huffed out.

“Seriously?” Spencer replied, entirely frustrated with you. “This isn’t some tea party. We aren’t just hanging around here for fun. Call whoever that was and tell them that you’re gonna be late. Or call and cancel, or-”

“No!” You yelled back, entirely frustrated with him. “Dammit, Spencer! People have responsibilities, you know! I have responsibilities. I am an adult, I’m not some child you can talk down to. Now get the fuck out of my house so I can lock up, and get to the important things that I have to do. Things that don’t involve wasting my time talking to you.”

You said the last part so snidely, resenting that Spencer’s unexpected visit had been part of your day.

He opened his mouth to argue against this, but JJ put a gentle hand on his shoulder, nudging him toward the door. He sighed and flexed to this movement. He angrily stormed past you to leave through the front door, which he left wide open like a toddler having a tantrum.

You grabbed your keys and your purse from a side table near the door and JJ moved to leave as well. On her way along, she put a gentle hand on your shoulder, capturing your attention.

“We’ll check back in with you later, okay?” She said, using her most gentle, non-confrontational voice.

“Sure.” You easily agreed, unable to be angry with her. “But just call, or something. There’s no need to bang down my door over some stupid flowers. It’s nothing.”

She stepped through the door and you followed. As you used your keys to lock up, you added on:

“I would give you my number, but I’m sure Penelope can find it for you in five minutes flat.”

JJ chuckled at this.

“More like two and a half, I’d say.” She replied - it was a joking tone, but she did truly think this highly of Penelope’s skills.

You smiled over your shoulder at her and she nodded before she began to walk back to the car, where Spencer was already sitting in the passenger’s seat, stewing in his anger.

When she got in beside him, they watched you pull out of the driveway and drive off before either of them spoke.

“What the hell happened between the two of you?” JJ asked, the question finally unleashing from her lips.

“It’s complicated.” Spencer huffed out in reply, tired.

In order to distract himself from all of it, he was staring down at some files in his lap - some of the case files of the other murders that he had pulled out of his bag. He needed something to do to keep his mind from churning more on the fact that you seemed to hate him. He wanted to find a way to protect you now, instead of focusing on the past.

But JJ seemed hellbent on walking backward - getting him to look back on what happened between the two of you.

“I can do complicated.” She said. “We’ve got plenty of time. We should just sit here and wait for her to come back.”

“You should go check in with Hotch.” Spencer told her, dodging around the question once again. “I’ll come back after.”

“After what?” JJ questioned, finding this wording particularly strange.

JJ started the car and pulled away, hoping that you would be safe during the time they didn’t have eyes on you. The UnSub had a particular routine - he liked to stalk his victims for a few weeks before he broke into their homes and killed them. So she hoped that he wasn’t ready to make contact with you yet. She hoped that if he did, your gun and your alarm system would be enough to deter him.

“I - I wanted to get her something nice.” He answered, sounding rather shy about this proclamation. “Like she mentioned, her birthday just passed. And, according to the preschool forms, her son’s birthday was a week ago. I want to get something for him too.”

“They have the same birthday?” JJ asked.

“Not exactly the same, but their birthdays are only five days apart.” Spencer replied. “I missed his birth.” He added on, a quiet sigh, entirely melancholic. “I missed the whole pregnancy. I - I missed everything.”

“You still didn’t answer my question.” JJ reminded him. “What happened?”

Spencer knew she was asking as a friend. He knew that of all people - she was the one to talk to about this.

“It - it was right after Hankel.” He admitted quietly. “That was when Y/N and I broke up.”

“Oh.” JJ said quietly.

The air in the car became thick as the heaviness truly overtook her.

So, it was complicated.

But she definitely couldn’t understand your rage toward Spencer.

“When I came back from Atlanta, she knew I wasn’t the same. And things - we - we fell apart.” He admitted this barely above a whisper, hesitant to even voice the words as a reality. “You knew what kind of person I was back then. I wasn’t good to her. I wasn’t good to anybody.”

Spencer let out a harsh chuckle - a defense to all the hurt he was feeling about it.

JJ spotted a sign for a shopping center, and pulled into the parking lot. She knew that Spencer likely had a good idea about buying into your good graces with a late birthday gift. Even if it wouldn’t instantly make up for everything that had happened all those years ago.

“Yeah, but you’re sober now.” She reminded him.

“She doesn’t know that.” Spencer replied.

JJ ruminated in thought for a moment.

“You know, I met Will afterwards, right?” She said.

Out of the corner of her eye, Spencer nodded.

“It was only a few weeks after everything happened, when we were working that case in New Orleans.” She explained. “And he looked at me like I was a hero. Because I helped him finish what his father couldn’t. He didn’t look at me like I was fragile or broken. He didn’t tip-toe around me. He didn’t see me as some ghost. And that is part of the reason why I fell for him. He always saw me as this goddess. Like Superwoman.”

Spencer smiled at this.

He wanted to be that person for you. He wanted to be your Superman. (But he feared that he couldn’t live up to that. That he would fail you when the time came.)

JJ found a parking spot, and parked, but Spencer lingered - sensing there was more to the conversation.

“You know… Henry wants a puppy.” JJ’s voice shook, her throat clenching up around these words.

Spencer’s stomach shook.

He hadn’t been there, but he had seen the scars on JJ’s arms. He had seen the footage of the other poor woman being torn apart by those dogs.

“And I had to tell Will everything. How I was chased down, how I had to shoot two innocent animals - the stupid fact that I still feel guilty about it, even though they would have killed me if I hadn’t done it.” She said, her throat becoming more closed off with each word. She cleared it before she spoke again. “How I lost you, how it was all my fault.”

“What happened to me wasn’t your fault.” Spencer felt the need to say this aloud, reaching over and putting a gentle hand on her knee. She nodded at him before she continued.

“Just - it was all so overwhelming. The idea of having a dog in our house. But… I told him that I wanted to try, at least. For Henry.” JJ explained. “But when we went to the animal shelter - the sound of dogs barking… I couldn’t stop myself from flinching. And next thing I know, I’m sitting on the curb outside with my head between my knees and Will is putting a bottle of water to my lips.”

“Henry seems more like a cat person anyway.” Spencer replied, hoping this slightly humorous comment would offer some comfort to his friend.

JJ let out a tired laugh.

“He’s three and a half, I think we’re still in the stage where a goldfish is more than enough for him.” She added on.

“I - I never told Y/N.” Spencer said, suddenly shifting the conversation. JJ raised her brow, prompting further explanation of this. “I never told her what happened to me. What happened with Hankel.”

JJ gave him a sad look.

“Why not?”

“I - I didn’t want her to view me as weak. I couldn’t fight him off. I accepted the drugs. At certain points, I…. I even pitied him.” Spencer replied. “I didn’t want things to change between us. Even though they did anyway.”

“Do you still wanna be with her?” JJ asked.

“What?” Spencer gaped, not expecting the question.

“If the kid is yours, obviously you wanna be in his life. But co-parenting as separate, single people is one thing.” JJ explained herself. “Do you still want to be with Y/N? Do you still love her?”

“Yes.” Spencer replied shyly.

“Then you have to tell her everything.” JJ said firmly. “Being with someone for the long term isn’t about creating some fantasy. I fell in love with Will because he looked at me like I was Superwoman, but I stayed in love because he takes care of me when I’m powerless. You have to be weak in front of her and let her take care of you, so that you can be strong everywhere else.”

Spencer sighed - letting this wisdom fully penetrate him.

He knew that being a genius sometimes meant that he wasn’t the smartest person in the room. Apparently, this was one of those times.

“You’re right.”

Then, he reached for the car door’s handle, feeling like JJ had taught him a lot with that conversation and he needed some time to think alone.

“You want me to come with you?” JJ asked. “You might need a woman’s opinion on what to get,”

“No thanks, I know Y/N pretty well.” He replied. “At least I hope I still do.” He opened the door fully and stepped out. “And I wanted some alone time, to… think all of this over. To think about what I’m gonna say to Y/N. I’m gonna walk back afterwards, the house is only a few blocks away.”

JJ nodded.

“I should check back in with Hotch.” She noted. “See if they found anything with the other women on the list. Otherwise, all we’ve got is the flowers.”

Just as he moved to close the door again, JJ spoke up one last time.

“Rubble.” She said suddenly - which sounded very strange with no context.

“What?” Spencer asked, ducking his head down to see inside the car to potentially hear her words better.

“Rubble - it’s a character from the kids’ TV show, Paw Patrol.” She explained. “There was about five action figures of him sitting on the living room floor back there. So I would assume that he’s your son’s favorite character.”

Spencer’s chest jumped at the way she said ‘your son’ - so casually.

He could really have a child in his life. This could really be his future.

If he played his cards right, this could be his future with you.

“Thank you, JJ.” Spencer grinned at her.

She smiled back and he stood up to his full height and closed the car door, walking off into the shopping center by himself.

And of course, his thoughts drifted back to you.

He thought back to the last time he had spent your birthday with you. Before Hankel, before all the madness. Before everything good in his life slipped through his fingers and he was left feeling so alone.

…

For someone with basically no serious relationships under his belt before you came along, Spencer was excellent when it came to romance.

Perhaps it was because he spent his time reading the classics - he could recite Elizabethan poetry off by heart, he could whisper epic romantic ballads in your ear before kissing you with such intense passion that it left your head spinning. He had such a perfect picture of what romance should be, and it meant that he knew how to plan a date that left you feeling like a queen.

Every single time he took you out, he made you feel like you were the only woman on earth - like he would move the seas and the sky just to show you how much he cared.

And because he insisted that your birthday should be a day all about you - a day dedicated to celebrating you - then this was certainly no different.

The night had been a whirlwind of perfection.

After dinner at a gorgeous fine dining restaurant downtown, Spencer then drove the two of you to an art gallery to stroll around. He cited that he wanted you to have some down time for your food to settle before he gave you your present. From the spark in his eye, you had a feeling that you knew exactly what that present would be. The whole evening was so utterly beautiful and peaceful. And like everything with Spencer - it was a pleasant enrichment of the mind, looking at art while he told you things about the artists or the origins of the paintings.

Before you got halfway through the gallery, he checked his watch and told you that it was ‘just about time’ for your present, and then he drove you back to his apartment.

The two of you barely made it through the door before you had him pinned against it, your mouth enveloping his in a hot, desperate kiss. You were so utterly grateful to have such a romantic, thoughtful man in your life.

The entire evening had been nothing but a reminder of that - the way he looked at you with love so pure in his eyes. Him opening doors for you, keeping his hand on your lower back to usher you gently around, speaking lowly to you as though his words were precious and only meant to be yours.

You needed him. You needed to show him how much you appreciated all of it. You needed him to know how much of a treasure he was in your life.

You reached for his belt and Spencer let out a choked off moan into your mouth.

You were surprised when he reached for your wrist, gently pulling your touch back - stopping you from unfastening the belt as he pulled his now slightly swollen lips away from your kiss.

“As - as much as I want to,” He huffed out against your mouth. “I - I still have to give you your present.” He noted, flashing you a smile.

“I thought this was my present.” You replied, reaching down to grope Spencer’s half hard cock through his pants.

He let out a groan; but then he reached for your wrist again, pulling your touch back.

“I - I promise - later - afterwards? Later tonight.” He stuttered out, hard pressed to focus as more blood rushed to his cock.

Spencer puzzled you. You had never known any other man to interrupt foreplay for something other than sex, unless it was life or death. But it made you very curious about what your present was and why he was so desperate to give it to you.

And sex was still on the table, so that panging need between your legs would be taken care of eventually.

You hummed in ascent and stepped back, releasing Spencer from where you had him pressed against the door. He gulped in a large breath of air before he moved across the room.

You were surprised when he didn’t move to turn on any lights in the apartment, leaving the two of you settled in comfortable darkness. The only lights being the light from the bathroom that he had left on before leaving, shining down the hall, and the dim lighting coming in the windows - some street lights and the occasional passing car’s headlights.

Spencer shrugged off his blazer and tossed it over the back of the couch on his way toward the window. He yanked up the blinds in front of the space where he had set up a very expensive, advanced, gorgeous telescope - one that had been there the last few times you had visited. Astronomy was one of his many hobbies, and he often invited you to view different stars or passing comets. It was just one of the many things you learned from him - knowledge you absorbed from being around him that made you feel infinitely smarter.

You always indulged in the joy of feeling smarter just from being in his presence. You loved that Spencer was someone so gifted who loved to share his knowledge, rather than gatekeeping it or being snide toward others who weren’t as privileged as him. It was just another thing to love about him - the fact that he was so kind in sharing his big brain with others.

You watched him with intrigue while you took your wrap off your shoulders and tossed your purse onto the couch. Enjoying the quiet and the peaceful darkness and watching him work, you moved to sit on the arm of the couch to begin unstrapping your heels.

He checked his watch again, and then looked to a small side table he had near the telescope. He flipped open a notebook that he had there, and you supposed that the minimal light coming in through the window was enough for him to see whatever it was that he had written there. He adjusted the telescope slightly, then looked at the notebook again, then adjusted the telescope again.

Then he said ‘aha, there you are’ under his breath, grinning widely to himself.

The entire thing made your insides glow with curiosity.

Spencer then turned back to you, still grinning widely. When he noticed your shoe half-hanging off your foot, he stepped over to you and softly grabbed your ankle, sliding your shoe off the entire way before gently rubbing the sole of your foot.

“Let me help you with that, Princess.” He said quietly, before moving to take the shoe off your other foot.

Again, your insides tingled as he made you feel like you were the most important woman on earth.

“Thank you.” You replied, almost speechless at the action.

“If you’ll step right this way, I can show you your present.” He said, motioning toward the telescope with a dramatic flare.

You let out a giggle as you stepped over your abandoned shoes and moved to look into the telescope.

You wondered if he had written some poem and taped it onto the other end of the lens or something like that (it was Spencer, it must have been something epically romantic). But as you bent down and closed one eye to get a good look, it was entirely ordinary.

The telescope was focused on a single, tiny star.

It was beautiful, but it was very… plain. And more than anything, it was confusing.

Your present was… a star?

“Spencer, I don’t really get it?” You sighed, standing up to your full height once again.

“I got you a star.” He said proudly, grinning even wider now.

When you stared at him with more intense confusion, Spencer reached over to the notebook and pulled something out. After he handed it to you, you leaned into the light of the window and studied it carefully.

It was a certificate stating that Spencer had paid to name the star after you.

He had literally changed the night sky for you.

“Oh my god.” You gasped quietly.

You felt so overwhelmed.

If he had made you feel like the most important woman in the world before, then now - you felt like the most important woman in the galaxy.

“Spencer, this is - this is too much.” You said, your throat clenching up slightly due to the intensity of the emotions.

“No, it’s not.” He said firmly, reaching out and putting a hand on your jaw, tilting your face up from looking at the certificate to look at him.

There it was again, all of it spelled out in his eyes - the adoration, the pure, overwhelming affection that he felt for you. It bloomed nothing but those same feelings in return from you. It was almost so overwhelming that you felt like you could have exploded from how much love you felt for this man, all of it swelling inside of you so quickly that you felt like your body couldn’t contain it. Like it was a sickness that was going to overrun your body if you weren’t careful.

“Spencer.”

His name swelled in your throat like that throbbing love, and you couldn’t help yourself from reaching out and grabbing him by the front of his shirt, pulling him into another kiss. Because of course, words weren’t enough. You smothered him with your mouth, trying desperately to communicate every ounce of passion and gratefulness you were feeling with the heat of that kiss.

Spencer held you, engulfing both your cheeks with his large, warm hands, kissing you back with just as much intensity.

Both of you lingered there for a few moments, savoring each other’s lips, mingling in each other’s breath.

You were disappointed when Spencer pulled away.

“There is something else.” He told you, a bit of glee edging on his voice.

“What?” You gaped, shocked by this.

“There’s something else I have to give you. Another part of your present.” He clarified, pulling back completely - likely in order to fetch this thing.

You let out a breath. You weren’t sure how this magnificent man could possibly do more.

You placed the certificate for the star down on the table where Spencer had kept it. Later, you would take it home and have it framed, wanting to display it proudly. You could imagine yourself putting it up in the front of your home when you eventually moved in with Spencer. You could put it next to your marriage certificate; eventually, put next to wedding photos when the two of you eventually got married. (And sometime later, it would be hanging alongside photos of you and Spencer with your kids. You tingled, realizing that this was the first time you had ever thought of having kids with him, but it fit so well. It seemed right.)

The thought made you tingle.

You could truly imagine yourself having a life with Spencer. Standing proudly because this was just the beginning of it. He truly felt like ‘the one’ you had always been waiting for.

“Here.”

Spencer’s voice pulled you from your plethora of dreamy thoughts, and you turned to see him holding a velvet box. Your heart skipped a beat at the passing thought that it might be the box - but no. Now wasn’t the time. The two of you had only been dating for a year and a half. And while you were so deeply in love, you knew that it was a bit haste to assume that he was ready for marriage when you were his first serious girlfriend. You were still both so young.

He opened the lid and you let out a small gasp when you saw it.

It was a simple, elegant silver necklace. The pendant was a four pointed star, with a small, dainty stone in the middle. You easily recognized it as your birthstone, meant to represent the fact that he had given it to you on your birthday. And obviously the star pendant as a whole represented that he had also gifted you a literal star in the sky on that same day.

“Spencer, it’s so beautiful.” You said, utterly breathless.

“Traditionally, the four pointed star is believed to represent the designation of a goal. It marks one’s great endeavors, because it seems to point to the four cardinal directions. This star is meant to guide someone, like a map - the way that sailors used the stars to guide their path.”

Spencer explained, knowledgeable as he always was.

“I - I chose this for you because… well, because when I met you, I felt as though I had accomplished great things in all areas of my life, except for one. Academically, I was satisfied. In my career, I was happy. But when it came to matters of the heart… I was utterly clueless. And when I found you… it felt like you were my guiding star. Like you were the person I had been waiting for to finally show me - show me the meaning of love.”

“Oh, Spencer.” Your voice cracked around these words, barely able to form them. “Oh, honey. I love you so much. Thank you.”

It was all your mind could gather at the moment. It wasn’t the first time you had said it to him, but it was certainly one of the most intense.

“I love you too.” He replied. Through the dimness, you could almost see tears forming in his eyes. “You truly make me so happy.”

Spencer then cleared his throat harshly, wanting to clear away his intensely emotional tears.

“Can - can I put it on you?” He asked shyly, motioning with the necklace in its box.

“Of course.” You grinned. “I’d love that.”

You turned around and Spencer took it out of the box, fiddling with the dainty clasp for a moment before he put it around your neck and then did it up for you. It felt so right around your neck. It felt like his love was being carried with you. You had a feeling that you wouldn’t want to take it off anytime soon. You could easily imagine yourself feeling so proud to answer whenever random strangers or your co-workers asked where it was from.

When it was secured around your neck, Spencer leaned in and laid a gentle, open-mouthed kiss against the chain. This simple act reminded you of that needy throb between your thighs; of what you had been wanting so badly the moment you had come in the door.

“So…” He whispered against your neck. “What else does the birthday girl want?”

“I can think of a few things.”

That was how you ended up with your back pressed against the softness of the couch - too impatient to even make it to the bed - with your dress pushed up around your waist, your panties tossed somewhere in the middle of the living room rug. Spencer’s glasses were pressed up onto his forehead while his knees dug into that same rug, his fingers splayed across your thighs, holding you open to makeway for his tongue.

He ate you out with all of the intensity and passion that he had kissed you with - moaning into your pussy as though he was singing directly to the gods.

“Fuck, Spence.” You moaned, raking your hands through his hair, holding him close - not that he would want to pull away for even a second.

He loved your taste more than anything in the world, and he savored every second that he got the privilege of being on his knees for you. He moaned into your pussy, loudly, almost pathetically - hot echoes coming from his lungs as though he was the one being pleasured. He laved his tongue across you with an open jaw, drinking in as much of you as possible while your thighs quaked around his head. Your nails dug into his scalp and he only moaned harder, loving the sound of your needy whines and your gasping breaths as your clit throbbed under his tongue.

Spencer hummed in delight while he bounced your clit on his tongue, loving the feeling of that sweet little bead throbbing against him; loving your taste, loving your echoing moans. Loving how much he could bring you pleasure.

“Fuck, Spence, so close!”

He put his lips around you and sucked then, holding you gently against him by the hips. He couldn’t help but to enjoy the feeling of your body quaking against his face while your orgasm overtook you. It was overwhelming and beautiful and warmed your whole body - just like the love you felt for him.

He pulled away after a moment, when he was sure that he had seen you through to the satisfying end, and he grinned against the mound of your pussy.

“Happy birthday, pretty girl.”

…

After the break-up, Spencer often looked up to the sky and thought about you.

On the nights when your star was in place overhead, he felt a particular pang in his chest. He wondered where you were and what you were doing. He wondered if you were safe. He spent many nights staring out his telescope, wondering if you were happy, blanketed under that inky sky.

You thought about the star sometimes, too.

You thought it was a lot like your relationship with Spencer. Placing all of your hopes and dreams onto something already dead - something where the light had died out long ago.

...

Continue reading: Chapter Three - Turn It Off

#sundrop writes #criminal minds fanfiction #criminal minds #criminal minds fic #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid #dad!spencer reid #spencer reid imagine #spencer reid smut #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid x y/n #spencer reid x you

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cozage · 11 months

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Hello! I'm always tempted to go anon because for some reason, I expect judgment from people who are here for the same reason I am. It's very silly. But anyway. May I please have Law and Luffy in an Ace-Marineford situation (captured by the marines and set for public execution) with their s/o being the Luffy, head of the pack coming to save them. But like they survive! Maybe their s/o loses a limb or an eye or is badly hurt or something, but they survive and are together at the end. I'm here for angst, not more Marineford related trauma!

Thank you for your time.

A/N: Im so glad you don't turn anon! And I'm so glad you're here :) Ohhhkay! I imagine this takes place in Dressrosa. You get captured during the escape, and the Strawhats + Law rush to come to get you in Marineford.

P.S. I realized you wanted Luffy and Law separately about 2/3rds through writing this story IM SO SORRY.

Characters: gn reader x Strawhats & Law

Cw: reader peril, fighting, reader getting injured, Marineford spoilers

Total word count: 2k

How to Save a Life

Looking down at Marineford, Luffy found it all extremely foreign. He remembered the platform where you kneeled to the world. But everything else was unfamiliar.

Of course, they had to rebuild a lot of it after Ace’s execution. Luffy remembered that much. The devastation that had been caused by both sides had been immense. But they had chosen to rebuild regardless. And now Luffy was back here again. For you.

His entire command of 4,000 individuals had come along with him, as well as Law. But Luffy refused to allow the execution to drag on longer than it needed to. The world government knew how much of a threat he was now. And if he didn’t get to you quickly, they would kill you in a heartbeat.

They had two Vice Admirals ready to perform the execution. Luffy’s conqueror haki wouldn’t impact them the way it had the last time. His best bet would be to get up close to you and get out.

Everyone was frozen, waiting for the first person to make the move.

“Please leave, Luffy!” you screamed, breaking the eerie silence that had begun the moment his ship rose from the sea. “It’s a tr-”

Akainu slammed his foot into your back, shoving you down into the ground to keep you quiet, and Luffy’s rage ignited. There was no way in hell that Luffy would allow Akainu to kill two people he loved.

“Torao-”

As he spoke to get the other captain’s attention, a blue hue appeared around him. It didn’t encapsulate the entirety of Marineford, but it would get him closer to you. Close enough.

“Ready!” Akainu commanded, and the two Vice Admirals raised their swords.

Luffy gritted his teeth, praying he would get there in time. He felt his surroundings change, and suddenly he was in the middle of the air. His hand slung back and shot forward. But even if he could take out one of the executioners, there was still another sword that would end your life. You closed your eyes and braced yourself for the end. All you could do now is hope that Luffy and the others would make it out alive.

A fist met your face, and you could feel your entire body blow backwards from the impact of the punch. You could hear the sound of two swords smack against the wooden platform, and you cracked an eye open to see what was happening.

Luffy was soaring through the air, diving headfirst to you. He had punched you out of the way of the execution. It was such an idiotic but obvious answer, and of course Luffy thought of it.

He screamed your name, reaching out towards you. You could see the Marines tense, looking to Akainu for direction, but you didn’t care. The only person you cared about now was Luffy.

“Luffy, wait!” you screamed, desperate to get him to stop. You expected that Akainu anticipated some kind of complication. To him, you were just bait for a bigger fish. “It’s a trap!”

“I’m coming for you!” Luffy yelled back. “Don’t stop fighting!”

You knew he wouldn’t stop. You knew he didn't care if it was a trap. He had a panicked look in his eyes, only focused on you. So you listened to your captain.

As Akainu approached you, his hand began flowing with magma. He was expecting you to cower, to be frozen in fear as Luffy had been the last time he was here. And when Akainu went in for the kill, Luffy would sacrifice himself to save you, just as Ace had last time.

But you refused to let that happen. Luffy wouldn’t be dying for you. He wouldn’t be dying anytime soon. Not before he became king of the pirates.

You scrambled away from Akainu as best you could, giving Luffy as much time as possible to come up with some kind of plan. Your shackles didn’t give you much movement on the platform, but it was enough to keep yourself away from him.

You saw the outline of one of Luffy’s Elephant Gun attacks, and you braced yourself for another punch. The wooden platform splintered under you, and you felt rubber arms wrap around you, pulling you to him.

“Watch the sea prism!” you cried out, but suddenly Zoro was next to you. He looked startled, as if he wasn’t expecting to be there, but he quickly examined the situation and drew his blades. He sliced your shackles off and grabbed your arm, trying to stop his forward momentum. You all tumbled to the ground, Luffy turning into a balloon at the last second to cushion your fall.

“Stupid cannons,” Zoro mumbled, holding his swords out while looking at the Vice Admirals. Luffy stood next to him, gearing himself up for battle. Zoro glanced over at you and gritted his teeth in irritation. “Get back to the ship!”

You looked at the two of them, protecting you. “Luffy-”

“Just get inside Torao’s room,” Luffy reasoned. For once in his life, he actually made sense. “Then we’ll join you.”

You nodded and turned on your heels to run towards the blue hue in the distance. You didn’t want to leave them, but you were the Navy’s primary target, and you knew everyone would be coming to attack you. You had to remind yourself this was a rescue mission, and if you died, then everything they did would be for nothing.

You ran, fighting off Marines as you ran past them. You picked up a sword from a fallen soldier as defense, thankful for all of the times Zoro made you train with him. Marines were surrounding you slowly though, and you knew you wouldn’t last much longer like this.

You had made a mistake. You knew that, and as much as you wanted to correct it, it was too late. Pain ripped through your abdomen, and you screamed out. A sword had found its way into your flesh, and you could see blood beginning to blossom from the wound area, spreading over your clothes.

You wanted to collapse from the pain. To curl up and die, to give in to the will of the World Government. But you had to find a way to survive. You couldn’t die now, so close to freedom. Luffy would never forgive you. You couldn’t leave him alone. So you stabbed at the Marines, sweeping them to the side and continued on your journey.

“Y/N!” Luffy’s voice came from behind you, screaming out in desperation. You were too tired to turn around and look at him, but you could hear the slap of his sandals as he approached you. It was all you could do to keep upright.

His arms wrapped around you, helping support you. The second you felt him, you leaned heavily into him, the adrenaline wearing off now that you knew you were safe. You still had at least 500 yards to go, but you knew Luffy wouldn’t let anything happen to you now. Your vision began to blur, and you suddenly felt very cold and very tired.

“Don’t give up yet,” Luffy yelled, shaking you awake. “You have to keep moving.”

Luffy’s voice held a certain urgency that willed you back into the moment. You blinked away the sleep from your eyes and kept moving closer to the blue hue of safety. It was closing in fast, 400 yards, then 300, then 200.

“Zoro?” You paused to look around for the mossy haired swordsman, but Luffy kept propelling you forward.

“He’s holding off the admirals,” Luffy said, adjusting his grip around you.

Luffy could feel you tense at that, but he kept moving. He was practically dragging you now from walking so fast. It was all your legs could do to not give out, but neither of you could worry about Zoro now. He was capable enough to hold his own against any enemies you faced, this was no different.

You practically flung yourself into the blue sphere, and instantly felt weightless in the air, before dropping onto the deck of a ship. You groaned and rolled over, face to face with a green haired man that wasn’t Zoro.

You yelped out in surprise, trying to scramble backwards away from the stranger.

“Oh man, you look like you’re in rough shape!” the man said. “Nothing you haven’t been through before though, right?”

You gave him a confused and irritated look, but he turned his attention from you and looked out. “A doctor! Y/N needs a doctor!”

“I’m a doctor, idiot!” You heard Law’s voice in the distance and felt calmer. At least you were amongst friends, even if you weren’t sure who they were.

“You can’t leave Mister Luffy and-” The green haired man spoke again.

“I’m not!” Law shot back. His voice was still strained, but it was softer when he addressed you. “Can you hold on a few minutes?”

You nodded, pressing your hand against your stomach wound. You needed to slow down the bleeding as much as possible. Your vision was hazy and you felt cold, but you forced your eyes to stay open.

A few seconds later, Luffy and Zoro appeared next to you where some barrels were. Luffy ran to you, covering you in kisses.

“Luffy,” you said, struggling to hang on to consciousness. “Tell Law I’m type F.”

“Type F?” he asked, looking at you with concern, but you had already given into the darkness.

---

When your eyes fluttered open, you laid in a bed with bright lights above you. There was a mechanical whirring and steady beeps of machines, letting you know you were alive.

“You were lucky,” Law said, looking down at you. “Incredibly lucky. If that blade had hit one more inch to the left and you wouldn’t be here now.”

You let out a shaky breath, scared of what could have been. “Thank you, Law,” you said.

He raised an eyebrow. “For what?”

“Saving me?” you laughed, which in turn made you wince in pain.

“I didn’t save you,” Law said. “There wasn’t much I could do besides close up the wound.” His eyes darted to the bed next to you. “What you needed was a blood transfusion, which he helped with.”

You turned your head slightly to find Luffy sleeping in the bed next to you. He had a bandage wrapped around his arm, but other than that he looked relatively fine.

“Luffy?” you asked, and Law nodded.

At the mention of his name, Luffy stirred, mumbling a strew of syllables mixed between your name and different kinds of meat. After a moment, his eyes flicked wide open, and he bolted upright, looking around frantically.

“Did we do it?” he asked, looking at Law.

Law’s eyes darted over to you, and finally Luffy turned, his eyes meeting yours. A wide grin appeared across his face, and laughter bubbled up inside of him.

“You’re okay!” he cried. Luffy jumped out of his bed and into yours, wrapping you tight in a hug.

You ignored the pain of your wound for the moment, thankful to be in his embrace again.

“Get off!” Law scolded his fellow captain. “If that wound opens up again we’re all back where we started!”

“Sorry, sorry!” Luffy said, still giddy with the fact you were back in his arms. He loosened his grip, but didn’t let you go completely.

You leaned in to him, trying your best not to cry. “Thank you, captain. Thank you for saving me. Twice.”

“I’ll always come back for you,” Luffy murmured in your ear, giving you a light squeeze. “No matter what. You’re stuck with me now, and I won’t let anything happen to you. That’s a promise.”

#one piece #one piece imagine #one piece scenario #one piece x reader #one piece x you #monkey d luffy #monkey d. luffy #luffy #luffy x y/n #luffy x reader #cozage #✧˚ luffy✧˚

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shintin · 11 months

Text

I may have decided to write a Mafia Vash the Stampede fic with my partner in crime, Creamson😁

He's going to look like this:

Art belongs to creamsonlog on twitter. Thank you babe for this masterpiece ❤

He's so hot, I know, but please, let's keep our pants on for at least 2-3 chapters, if you know what I mean 😈

(you may think you know what I mean, but nope, I promise, you don't. it'll surprise you)

Note: This fic is going to take place in the Alternative Universe/Modern Setting where Vash and his dear brother, Kni are dons of a well-known, violent mafia family. You may say, "what the hell, Shin! Vash would never be like that! "

Well... what if something bad happens that finally snaps Vash? What if staying by his brother's side has changed him a little more than you think? What if this is Dark Vash coming to life?

Warnings: This will be a dark-love story that includes sexual situations, non/dub-con, graphic violence, gore, angst and toxicity.

A lot of toxicity!

I’m a woman in love with Vash the Stampede, okay? I want to see his dick as much as possible.

So, if any of these are triggering for you, please do not even think about reading this fic when I start publishing it.

I know some authors don’t like to lay out the specific triggers, as they want readers to experience the book blind. I get that, but with this fic, I simply would not feel right if I did not make these triggers very clear.

The last thing I would ever want to do is put a reader through any type of trauma, whether it’s new or relived. And to be frank, this fic will cover pretty fucked up subject matter.

By the way, this will be a Vash the Stampede x Female Reader fic. Yeah, it has cute stuff too, like it's a slow burn fic, just not the way you think.

p.s: It'll take a while for me to start writing it. I'm just super excited about the ART 🥵

Okay, link for the fic: Gunpowder Dreams

Have fun 😁

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aftgficrec · 10 months

Note

Can you post fics where Andrew and Neil argue but make up in the end?

Enjoy this walk through andreil feels, anon. The previous asks mentioned lead to a bunch more asks and fics. -A

also see:

andreil arguing here

new andreil breakup/make-up here

fave break up and make up here

andreil or jerejean kiss & make-up here

miscommunication leading to near-breakups here

angst w/happy ending: miscommunication or pining here

andreil enemies to lovers 2 here

Andrew makes Neil cry here

Neil snaps ‘not nothing’ here

‘quicksand’ here

‘low quay, no pressure’ here

‘transience’ here

‘transmission’ here

‘Tumblr Headcanons - Andreil’ Ch 11 & 12 here

‘Neil worried that Andrew cheated’ here

‘Home for Christmas’ here

‘Wake Up to Your Sunset’ here (completed)

‘All I Wanted’ here

‘Some Kind of Disaster’ here

‘I’m Not Dead Yet’ here

‘Can Nobody Hear Me (I cannot breathe)’ here (completed)

‘nice to see your face again’ and ‘Dawn Won't End the Night’ (updated) here

‘please come back, save me from myself,’ ‘ghostin',’ and ‘I ran out of every reason’ here

‘but i don't think i can ever learn how to love just right’ here

‘Shared Custody’ and ‘Shared Custody (The Blame the Cat Remix)’ here

if you really love nothing by seasy33 [Rated M, 39713 Words, Complete, 2022]

Andrew finds an interesting piece of paper. He's not quite sure how he feels about it.

tw: graphic depictions of violence, tw: rape/noncon, tw: flashbacks, tw: alcohol

Undefined Roommates Code by Helpisneeded [Rated E, 56760 Words, Incomplete, Updated Oct 2022]

Punching your roommate is not a very smart idea. Starting a friends with benefits relationship with said roommate is an even worse one. Setting up a string of rules to keep it purely physical and make sure you don’t catch feeling but catching them anyways is certainly the stupidest thing you could do in that situation. Luckily for Neil, he never claimed to be smart.

tw: explicit sexual content, tw: implied/referenced child abuse, tw: implied/referenced suicidal tendencies

Regrowth by Mystrana [Rated E, 4836 Words, Complete, 2021]

It goes like this: Neil's giving therapy a chance. He's dealing with every emotion he's ever pushed down trying to leak back up. When he gets hurt during a game, Andrew gets upset and they get into an argument. And then Andrew apologizes. A fic in which Andrew and Neil work on healing together and cry and have the softest sex in the world.

tw: explicit sexual content

An intimate moment with someone you hate by krasmataz [Rated E, 7414 Words, Complete, 2023]

Neil and Andrew have their first fight after trying something new in the bedroom. Hope they figure it out before they destroy too much school property!

tw: implied/referenced self-harm, tw: blood, tw: implied/referenced suicidal tendencies

over/under by likearecord [Rated E, 9506 Words, Complete, 2023]

He’d thought Neil, with his smart mouth and his wild eyes, would be satisfied with what Andrew was offering. He guesses he’d thought Neil was used to living on scraps—and Andrew has never had anything meatier to give. He’d been wrong.

tw: explicit sexual content

Only Fools Fall. by Random2002 [Rated T, 19789 Words, Incomplete, Updated Feb 2023]

Neil tests how faithful his clients partners are. Roland is a client; he's worried about his boyfriend. It isn't long until Neil notices some serious rifts in the relationship he is meant to test.

tw: child abuse

Cold Cookies by Preludeno3 [Rated M, 11583 Words, Incomplete, Updated Jan 2023, Locked]

It starts off as an abstract, incomplete thought. Andrew’s on his knees on the rug in his Columbia bedroom, going to town on Neil’s dick. Or Andrew wants to try face fucking, trauma is a bitch and Neil is almost too understanding

tw: explicit sexual content, tw: implied/referenced rape/noncon

First fight by Olympyas [Not Rated, 3265 Words, Complete, 2023]

"There is no this, you are nothing and nothing doesn't exist." It hurt. A lot. Especially when you spent the whole day feeling like nothing. So he wanted to hurt Andrew in return. He wanted to get, even the slightest, reaction from him. "Well, at least you can't hurt 'nothing' like you destroy everything around you." —hurt him— "You'll still run away like the rabbit you are. Tell me, Nathaniel, why are you staying?" Neil hated this name in Adrew's mouth "For nothing. I shouldn't have stayed in the first place." And he left.

tw: panic attacks, tw: violence, tw: assault, tw: attempted rape/noncon

A Substitute For Please by cadkitten [Rated E, 1911 Words, Complete, 2018]

Please is a word built to make things easy and life has never been easy for either of them. Please is meant to smooth things over, but they're all rough edges. Please is a final ditch effort when hope is lost and, Neil, he knows there's still hope here.

tw: ptsd, tw: depression, tw: implied/referenced rape/noncon, tw: alcohol

NB: find more about Nicky’s state of mind here

To Be Close With You Is To Be Close With Myself by jostenskeys [Rated E, 20359 Words, Complete, 2022]

Andrew has always been a protector at heart despite how often he bullies Neil for his martyr complex. The summer before Neil's second year, however, he begins to feel the impacts of his life finally crash down on him just as they were finally safe from harm. Andrew fights with himself and doesn't know how he can help. But he soon realises, in order for him to help Neil, he needs to help himself too. Or The Convincing-Neil-To-Get-Therapy Chronicles. Written by Andrew Minyard and edited by Betsy Dobson.

tw: graphic depictions of violence, tw: rape/noncon, tw: self harm, tw: urge to self harm, tw: blood, tw: suicidal ideation, tw: nightmares, tw: panic attacks, tw: depression

Stay series by jaydreamz [Rated M/T, Collection with 2 complete works, Updated Nov 2021]

Part 1: Was Sorta Hopin' That You'd Stay [M, 25740 Words] Neil and Andrew have HATED each other since an incident in college. They really, really do. The Minyard-Josten rivalry is not a sham. But now Andrew's transferring to Neil's team and all hell is about to break loose.

tw: alcohol, tw: implied/referenced self harm, tw: explicit sexual content

Part 2: Before I Hated You [T, 5974 Words] Before the Minyard-Josten rivalry was on, there was something else entirely. *** Andrew and Neil's first meeting in college that ended up starting the feud between them.

Bittersweet by Mercey [Rated M, 8370 Words, Complete, AFTG Mixtape Exchange 2021]

‘Why would Neil want to be with someone who can’t even care for him the right way? Why would he want that life for himself? He’s not a runaway anymore, he’s not so desperate for affection that he’ll settle for my meagre offerings, and good for him. It’s better that way.’ Andrew's spiralling with graduation coming up, and beginning to question the very foundations upon which he and Neil are built.

tw: depression

Hold Each Other by exactly13percent_OLD (hymbeaux) [Collection Rated T/E, Complete, 2018]

Chapter 12: Stranger [T, 2854 Words] Sometimes, love comes easily. That's the problem.

I took a breath and took the knife by eeveepkmnfan [Rated M, 2271 Words, Complete, 2022]

Andrew and Neil argue. Or, Neil is still struggling through the aftereffects of being drugged. Andrew is forced to confront the consequences of that decision.

tw: transphobia, tw: implied/referenced sexual assault, tw: implied/referenced self harm, tw: implied/referenced involuntary drug use, tw: ptsd

Spring Cleaning with a Man on the Lam by SugarLime [Rated G, 2240 Words, Complete, 2019]

Neil glared at the wrapper Andrew had tossed on the floor next to his chair. He stalked over with a nasty frown and leveled a glare at Andrew. Andrew met his glare with an empty expression. “What?” He asked, following Neil’s gaze as it tuned to the discarded wrapper, “it’s a wrapper,” he said wisely. His gut did a small flip as he tried to figure out why his boyfriend was mad.

I Won't Be Home For The Rest Of The Night by CasTheButler [Not Rated, 1039 Words, Complete, 2017]

Neil and Andrew have a fight, Neil learns to let someone new in.

Stars and Moons by sonyathefairy [Rated G, 1111 Words, Complete, 2017]

Neil ponders about the stars and his fight with Andrew. Or in which they both realise that they can't live without the other anymore.

Where We Belong by conniptionns [Rated T, 1374 Words, Complete, 2017]

prompt: andrew and neil get into this huge fight while andrew is driving so he tells neil to get out the car and walk the rest of the way.

Still here by theresnothis [Rated T, 2779 Words, Complete, AFTG Summer Exchange 2022]

After a fight with Andrew, Neil ran off into the night (but he would go back). Andrew found him and of course with Neil’s luck a robbery would occur.

flashes of intimacy by mostly_maudlin [Rated T, Collection, Complete, 2023]

Chapter 3: conflict resolution [385 Words] Chapter 4: space [507 Words]

tw: mild self harm

Chapter 16: picking fights [554 Words]

tw: mild self harm

“I don’t want your pity, I want your absence.” by markonasurface (idwir) [Not Rated, 1627 Words, Complete, 2018]

After the freshmen find out about Neil and Andrew, a terrible practice leads to Neil saying things he shouldn’t.

tw: involuntary outing, tw: homophobia, tw: scars, tw: anxiety attack, tw: implied/referenced rape/noncon, tw: implied/referenced csa, tw: victim shaming, tw: self harm

“So much for not getting involved.” by markonasurface (idwir) [Not Rated, 769 Words, Complete, 2020]

“I don’t want your pity, I want your absence.” pt 2

tw: implied/referenced rape/noncon, tw: implied/referenced csa

“don’t call me that”-andreil prompt fill by @markonasurface [Tumblr, 2017]

Neil heard the door to the roof open and knew it was Andrew. Annoyance flooded his chest and he had the overwhelming urge to hit him. Instead he lit another cigarette and let Andrew pluck it from his fingers even though he hadn’t offered it to him.

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sincerely-sofie · 4 months

Note

Well if you thought the other comment was gold… how about adding some priceless gems, expensive luxuries and a tad bit of insanity and angst to the amazing story recipe that you have given us again to turn it into a true treasure… potentially.

—-

On the part of Palkia helping, I could see the first times not helping. After all it was their fault in not taking care of the time gears, they handle going a bit crazy a few more times…

Then Palkia notices(or told by Giratina) that Time, Space and Matter is getting damaged at a fundamental level by the other legendaries game with the Hero but as later said in this part… not to worry.

Things more physical things like paradox pokemon and ultra beasts showing up randomly in dungeons(time), items or teams that shouldn’t physically exist in this plane like pokeballs or the Disloyal Three Bandit Team start showing up(space) and mystery dungeons randomly appear and disappear without a single trace(matter).

Then the thing that’s more important to Palkia, Dialga is starting to show physical and psychological pains. Trauma over the resets, small orange glowing scars from every time they go primal, a paranoia of not knowing exactly where the timegears are, etc.

And every time Palkia says anything, no matter what… they are always met with a “We’ll fix it next time”, “Oh the Tapu’s and Regi’s are handling it. No need to worry.” or “Stop being such a spoil sport and just have fun.”

They try to for a time… but they keep on looking to the future and see it’s slowly getting darker and slowing down, Arceus is going to accidentally cause Darkari’s old version of the world to come true. And their sibling no more than a shell of what they were like the true dragon of Unova.

Now Palkia and Giratina are on a timer like the Hero made for themselves, one that may end in a lot more trouble than Darkari’s version… permanently.

—-

For the onion fairy… I could see them being an ally to Grovyle for a time after the first reset and still remembering everything(they are a legendary of time after all), but after a while they think Arceus has it under control and becomes sort of a… entity of chaos AND the one who makes sure the story still flows.

They would be an opposite to the Hero; They want it all to end as quickly as possible and not having to endure another reset. But Celibi; they have lived countless lifetimes as a legendary and traveled through timelines, and if Arceus is making sure that the world won’t permanently end in times paralysis… what’s a few more go arounds.

—-

And as for a certain emo nightmare specter that started it all, after they get punished they go back to their duties but the legendaries realize a story isn’t complete without a villain.

They are stripped of most of their power, enough to put up a fight for the hero but not enough to cause a future issue.

At the start of they were as cocky and bitter as you could imagine but as time wore on and resets added up. They realized it was just a prison cell where they are viewed like a game more than a living world anymore.

By a certain point Darkari’s offer would turn into potential avenues of escape for them. Constantly scheming and plotting on how to escape the Dugtrio Day situation and actually help out the Hero and Partner out of this situation.

—-

But that’s a pseudo part 2 to this concept of a amazing concept, but anywho the void is calling again sooooo… toodooloo

(Referencing this chain of posts)

Everybody go home, @voidtravler just blew every idea I could ever have out of the water + bested me in storytelling combat, therefore winning the rights to the AU— and I, for one, welcome our new narrative overlord.

#jkjk #in all seriousness I want everyone to stare at this concept for the next 10 business days #this is bRILLIANT #sofie answers asks #Dugtrio Day AU #pokémon mystery dungeon #pmd explorers #pmd eos #pmd2 #pmd sky #pmd

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mrspockify · 5 months

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Loved the previous angsty ask about Mario's daughter. So have a couple more.

What if Bowser harms his daughter, whether that be physically or emotionally? (for example, having Kamek use his magic to torture her or Bowser scaring her by saying Mario will forget about her?) If Mario was bad when she was kidnapped I can only imagine how much worse his outburst will be then.

This is about King Boo this time. What if King Boo comes in the picture and traps Mia in a portrait, like in the Luigi's Mansion games? I can imagine King Boo is delighted that he got Mario's daughter, Mario would be ticked and terrified and dear old Uncle Luigi would go ABSOLUTELY FERAL and put aside his fear of KB and be a lot less merciful fighting King Boo to save his niece. Oooo the PTSD and angst this would bring! The nightmares Mia would have, the PTSD it would bring Mario and the wholesome fluff the father-daughter comfort would be.

What is Mario and/or Luigi gets injured in a battle with Bowser while saving Mia? Poor girl must feel really guilty. How would Mario and Luigi deal with this and comfort Mia?

Hope you enjoy the angst! Sorry if this is too long.

I have a hard time imagining Bowser would actually physically hurt Mia that badly. He's evil and malicious, but that's also very much a child, and I think even he has his own moral stances that would keep him from doing too much harm apart from maybe some rough handling. That might leave a few scratches and bruises still, and Mario would absolutely pick up on those immediately, and he would be furious. He'd inwardly vow to make sure Bowser's left with some of his own wounds, severe enough to be permanent reminders never to do this again. I do think Bowser would say a lot of things to Mia to hurt her, though. A lot of "this is your fault, when Mario comes to save you I'm going to finally kill him, and it'll be thanks to you setting the perfect trap, he's going to regret coming to your rescue," etc. Obviously those are lies, but once Mario rescues his daughter, he can't help but noticed how apologetic she is for some reason. When he finally pulls from her the things Bowser said, he's devastated, and he spends all night holding her and reassuring her that none of it was true, and things like that are never her fault.

I think that situation would pull together the most unstoppable brotherly duo imaginable. The moment Mario discovers what happened, he would go straight to Luigi and ask him what they needed to do. Luigi would end up needing to take charge for most of the adventure, because I think Mario would do his absolute best to fight his own fear response and trauma to being trapped in the paintings, but he would definitely be having a hard time. He'd still do everything in his power to help, but his own trauma and his overwhelming worry for his daughter would be very distracting (imagine that scene in LM3 where he's sobbing about Peach and begging Luigi to help, but even worse). Luigi, on the other hand, would be fueled by the instinctual need to save his niece no matter what. Even King Boo would be surprised at his determination and lack of mercy. He's not scared anymore. He doesn't have room for fear. Fortunately, Mia has two parents who know what she went through, so they are very well-equipped with experience and know exactly what kind of recovery Mia is in for. She also has her brave Uncle Luigi to remind her that she'll always be safe, and he will always bring her back home.

Similar to the first answer, I think Mia would struggle a lot with feeling like it was somehow her fault. The brothers could spend hours telling her it's not, but they would see the guilt in her eyes. It wouldn't be the healthiest way of dealing with things, but Mario and Luigi would 100% hide the true extent of their injuries to make her feel better, reassuring her that they weren't in pain and it wasn't actually that bad. A severe leg injury that leads to a limp being hidden by always sitting when she's around, third degree burns hidden underneath clothes at all times, pained winces kept at bay whenever she hugs them, etc. They'd do anything to keep that guilt from her eyes.

#ask #headcanons #dad mario #luigi #mario

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sarahrogersevans · 1 year

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Boom it’s me again hello world!

Ooooo what about if Chris has a daughter who he adopted or just had a shit mum (like Luna in a way) and chris is ✨single dad teacher! Chris✨ and she’s finding it hard being at his school so she’s usually always with Chris and in the sensory room because she does work independently with a teaching assistant and it’s a bad day for her and she’s just not okay mentally or emotionally so Chris just keeps a close eye on her and let’s her be but steps in when she gets too overwhelmed because she can sometimes zone out and hurt herself without knowing she’s doing it because ✨trauma response✨ and be brings her back and make sure she is fully back and safe and watches her closely so she doesn’t dissociate again and there’s all the fluff like she uses noise cancelling headphones when she needs, heavy hoodies from her dad etc etc and she’s trying to cope but it leads to this above situation ❤️

Only if you’re comfortable doing it of course!

School Can Be A Bit Much But My Teacher Dad Makes It Better- Teacher! Chris xreader fan fic request

Summary: Reader is having a hard time focusing at school and their anxiety is high and has flashbacks and Chris helps bring them back to now and comforts them

Warnings: mentions of dissociating, mentions of anxiety, comfort fluff, angst, fluff, soft Chris, mentions of having flashbacks, let me know if I miss anything

(Y/N’s POV)

Today is a really bad day for me mentally and being at school on a bad day is hard but luckily my teacher (also my dad) is letting me stay in the sensory room today and he comes and checks up on me every so often while I try and do some school work on my own. I keep dissociating without realizing it and I started to bite my nails again while reading my text book. My dad Chris comes in the room and says “hey Y/N, how is your worksheet coming- hey some of your fingers are bleeding kiddo what happened??”

I looked down at my hand and then remembered that I had bitten them bad enough to make them bleed. My dad noticed I wasn’t totally wasn’t focusing on where I was and looked at me and said “bad day huh?” I can’t to more when he closes my text book and wiped my face of my tears and nodded saying “I’m .. I'm sorry dad I can’t focus on work, too much going on in my mind.” My dad rubbed my back and said “hey that’s ok sweetheart no problem why don’t you try and relax a bit for now and we can get the rest done in a bit hmm?”

(Chris’s POV)

I was concerned about Y/N when I saw her nails and fingers were bleeding and I know she’s been through a lot with her mom in the past and I just have Y/N make sure she’s safe and cared for and don’t wanna push her to get everything done now and take it slow. Y/N sat back in the chair and rubbed her neck and put her head in her hands and I sat closer to her and said “hey Y/N shhh it’s ok hey I’m here kiddo you’re safe I promise.” Y/N looked over at me and said “safe..” and she had a shy smile and I nodded smiling back at her and said “that’s right pumpkin, here why don’t I help you with your assignment for English and then we can go get something to eat and then get back at it again?” She nodded and she hugged me saying “thank you dad I love you.”

I’m glad Y/N trusts me I know it’s not easy for her so I was happy to know I’m able to help her through her hard days. We got some lunch and then I had us play a game to give her brain a break from work and I think it really helped because she started being more open. Y/N said “school can be a bit much but my teacher dad makes it better, I’m glad you’re my teacher you make class fun.” I smiled and said “honey I’ll always be here to help you and help make things easier whenever you need me I’m here for you I promise kiddo it’s gonna be ok.”

(Y/N’s POV)

I started feeling more calm and Chris really helped making sure I was fully back and he has ways of making my class assignments easier and would make it more fun and when I felt stuck he would give me fun hints and I’d be able to pick up on it and it really helped distract me from my flashbacks that I had and I still felt a bit anxious but not as bad as I first was. Chris gave me space to work on the other assignments but still kept a close eye on me to make sure I was ok and I started to zone out again a bit and Chris came back over by me and said “hey Y/N do you remember that fun game we played earlier and how it helped you?” I came to and looked over at him and nodded and said “yea whenever I was stuck you would sing a song to help give me hints.” He smiled at me and said “how about we listen to some music for a bit I know music is always helps you.” Chris got his phone out and put on my favorite song and I patted my legs and sang along and Chris smiled at me and said “that’s my girl I’m so proud of you Y/N, you’re never alone we’ll get through these hard days together.”

Ok so I hope I did well 🤔🥺 I really hope you like it lovey ♥️♥️♥️ I’m sorry I was late with this one xx

Taglist:

@evansgurl-love @fluffycutecevans

@jessybarnes

@royalwritersoftheuniverses

@marvelstarker-mha98

@writersblog20

@delicatecoffeepeanut

@vrittivsanghavi

@nana1000night

@lokiandbuckysdoll

#chris evans #fluff #fanfics #chris evans fluff #chris evans x fem! reader #chris evans fan fic #chris evans angst #chris evans x reader #chris evans blurb #chris evans one shot #chris evans imagine #chris evans fan fiction #chris evans fandom #chris evans x female reader #angst fic #fanfic request

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linkles-art-blog · 7 months

Text

Darling, I forgive you, after all Anything is better than to be alone And in the end I guess I had to fall; Always find my place among the ashes…

So, a short time back, I released a poll asking people if they wanted new angst art for Cherish, and the replies given were overwhelmingly positive, so here it is: the first work in a two-part set of angst art pieces.

There is a lot I would like to say in regards to this particular piece and the symbolism behind it, but I think that I will save that for under the cut, due to post length, zoomed in images, and talk of some much heavier subjects.

The idea behind creating these two art pieces was initially to participate in Domestic Violence Awareness Month (which is of course in October, which is also coincidentally Arthur’s birth month), if that gives you any idea of some of the subjects that will be below the cut (along with the usual stuff that I include in all of my art posts).

…And most importantly, if you can, please consider donating to some of the lovely organizations that help victims of various forms of abuse. I don’t want to recommend any particular ones in this post, as I don’t want to accidentally link to a place that may not be as on the level as some others out there, but if you have the time, please explore the Domestic Violence Awareness Month topic online, as I’m sure there are many lovely folks who can direct you to some great ones.

Also, if you think you or someone you know is being abused, or you just want to educate yourself on domestic violence and abuse, please visit thehotline.org and loveisrespect.org, which are two very very lovely sites dedicated to helping people in abusive situations that I myself have visited in the past.

I love you all so much.

Do not repost this artwork anywhere without my explicit permission or claim it as your own. See F.A.Q.s for details.

So, let me start off by saying that Arthur in this artwork was originally supposed to have a similar injury on his head to that which is described in Chapter 13 of my fic, but that was ultimately scrapped as I decided I did not want to be quite that heavy-handed and obvious with the imagery.

With that out of the way, let’s examine the finished piece a bit closer!

First, let’s talk about the (slightly crooked) painting in the background: this piece is actually not created by me at all, but rather, it is a painting from 1870 called Little Red Riding Hood at Her Grandmother’s Door, by Frederick Warne — with the subject, as the title implies, being Little Red Riding Hood arriving at her Grandmother’s cottage.

This sets a subtle nod for the main theme of this piece — with Arthur dressed in an outfit inspired by and matching the same coloring scheme of Little Red Riding Hood’s iconic garb. Paul, on the other hand, sports the gray, white, and black colors of the Wolf, with his shadow coming out behind him as an unsettling and somewhat uncanny wolf shape, grinning with its teeth bared.

The purpose of this symbolism is threefold: Firstly and most superficially, the music video for the song that the second piece was most inspired by also has a slight Little Red Riding Hood theme to it, so this can be seen as a subtle nod to it, but more importantly, it not only sets the precedent of Paul as the predator and Arthur as his prey, but also is meant to hold the same implications of sexual trauma — as well as the old physical violence and “wolf in sheep’s clothing” adage — that the fairytale is commonly viewed through the lens of and thought to represent in modern times.

Continuing forward from that idea, we can see Paul’s right hand reaching uncomfortably close toward Arthur’s inner thigh, whilst Arthur’s hands are in chains — lending not only to the sense that the teen is trapped in this relationship, but that his significantly older lover very simply does not care if he wants to be in it or not, and will do whatever necessary to keep him where he wants him — even if it means mental or some variety of physical harm.

Furthermore, if we examine Rimbaud’s hands, we can see that he is making a careful attempt at signaling his distress to the viewer of the photo — using both of his hands to try to show off the chains and also subtly form and display the two phases of the sign for help — at the same time trying to keep his pose seeming as natural as possible in front of his abuser by not facing them towards the camera, but rather letting them rest downward in his lap.

And to further drive home the point that Verlaine is keeping him trapped in their partnership, we can see the key to Arthur’s cuffs dangling from the chain of the stopwatch in the elder poet’s pocket that is fastened to his lapel.

If we then look to Arthur’s and Paul’s faces, we can further determine the mood of the two men by examining their eyes and expressions.

Whereas Paul is staring intently into his young affair partner’s eyes and grinning widely — with the slightest shimmer visible in his irises — unbothered and uncaring of the wedding ring he still has boldly worn upon his hand, Rimbaud will not look him in the eyes, instead glancing off to the side (almost in the direction of his lover’s ring) with lightless eyes (this is the first time I have drawn Arthur without any form of eye shine to emphasize this point), furrowed eyebrows, and only a half-smile on his face, as barely visible tears well up in the corners of his eyes.

…And yeah, that’s been my little deep-dive on the symbolism of this art piece! I really wanted to create something that at just a quick glance would mostly appear happy and cute, but which — like the painting which is only very slightly tilted) would get increasingly more unsettling the longer and closer you looked at it, and I really hope that I successfully captured that feeling in this work and that you enjoyed reading along with my notes on it!

See you in the next piece!

—

Songs I listened to while drawing this:

My Cherish Playlist (the public and currently only partial version of which you can listen to here.)

Lithium — Evanescence (also linked above in lyric excerpt)

Call Me When You’re Sober — Evanescence

Love the Way You Lie — Eminem ft. Rihanna

Love the Way You Lie (Part 2) — Anson Seabra

His Hands — Jennifer Nettles

Concrete Angel — Martina McBride

Alyssa Lies — Jason Michael Carroll

Do Me a Favor — Anson Seabra

Walked Through Hell — Anson Seabra

Haunted — Evanescence

Surrender — Evanescence

Narcissist — Lauren Spencer Smith

My Heart Can’t Tell You No — Sara Evans

My Heart Can’t Tell You No — Rod Stewart

It’s A Heartache — Rod Stewart

I Don’t Want to Talk About It (1989 Version) — Rod Stewart

The Last Song I’m Wasting On You — Evanescence

I Fell in Love With the Devil — Avril Lavigne

My Happy Ending — Avril Lavigne

Because of You — Kelly Clarkson

Please Don’t Leave Me — P!nk

Try — P!nk

Everybody’s Fool — Evanescence

Tainted Love — Chase Holfelder & Tom Evans

Animal — Chase Hofelder

Vampire — Olivia Rodrigo

Memories — Conan Gray

Summer Child — Conan Gray

How Could You — Jessie Murph

(And mostly unrelated to the vibe but I listened to these too)

The First Cut is the Deepest — Rod Stewart

Half a Man — Dean Lewis

Complicated — Avril Lavigne

Before He Cheats — Carrie Underwood

Raise Your Glass — P!nk

Don’t Speak — No Doubt

Whisper — Evanescence

Taking Over Me — Evanescence

Footnote — Conan Gray

Family Line — Conan Gray

#linklethehistorian #linkle’s art blog #bungou stray dogs #bsd #my artwork #my original content #digital art #procreate #iPad Pro #apple pencil #cherish #spoilers #cherish spoilers #Arthur Rimbaud #paul verlaine #my fanfic #verrim #rimlaine

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4ragon · 1 year

Note

Thoughts on how sibling reveal would happen?

I mean, are we talking what I think would ACTUALLY happen, or are we talking the ideal?

[also uh AA5-6 spoilers]

See, because they wrote themselves into a bit of a corner with AA6, what with them writing Apollo out of the story altogether at the end, so it's going to be kind of hard to pull it off. Like, they're going to need a reason to bring Apollo back, or at least have him and Trucy in the same place. So I don't know, maybe Thalassa gets arrested? Or murdered? I guess it depends on who's going to write it, but it's hard not to imagine modern AA killing Thalassa for man pain and then just not addressing Trucy's deeply complicated relationship with her family at all in favor of Apollo angst that's handled incredibly poorly and doesn't really build to anything.

What I WANT to happen is for this to mean something. Of course, for an AA game, that means it would have to happen during or contingent with a case, so it would have to be central to the characters in some capacity. I think I'd want Apollo-and-Trucy as the lawyer and sidekick duo for sure, Apollo PoV.

I think the biggest thing I'd want from a reveal is for Trucy to lose her cool. I did enjoy her little breakdown in 6-2, but I want something big. I want anger, and hurt, and fear, and all this complex stuff she's been burying to burst out. Like, it goes without saying that Apollo is going to be mad at everyone involved, but I think he'd be faster to forgive Thalassa than Trucy would be. Like Apollo certainly has abandonment issues and a lot of family-related trauma and anger, but I think he also would understand that her leaving him the first time was not fully in her control. Meanwhile, Trucy would have to deal with the fact that Thalassa disappeared because of her grandfather, who then used that to blackmail his students. Like, that's a LOT to have to sort through as a teenager.

And I think the both of them being upset at Phoenix would be a decent way to keep both Phoenix and Athena out of the limelight, like they are pushing Phoenix away and Athena is trying to find a way to bridge the gap and get them to talk it out? And it takes some time, but they're able to have a heart-to-heart (maybe Apollo first?) and they're able to come to terms with everything. Honestly, I think I'd want a scene where Phoenix actually tries to make REAL amends with Apollo, or genuinely welcomes him into the family, because I want them to be family but I don't think they've earned it yet.

The specifics though...I feel like killing Thalassa off would be a copout, but it would be hard to work in this plot without her being central to the case. I guess the best bet is to have her get arrested? But what would be more interesting, her getting arrested before or after the reveal? Either way, I think having the entire case being Trucy and Apollo working through their feelings would be great.

And I know any AA7 would probably have a new prosecutor, but this would be a good time to bring back both Klavier and Nahyuta, since Klavier knows Thalassa and Nahyuta (or heck, Rayfa too) would have to be at least a little invested in Apollo's family situation. Give all of them the chance for some well-needed development.

I don't know. At the end of the day, I feel like they're going to bungle it, but who knows.

#ace attorney #thalassa gramarye #apollo justice #trucy wright #phoenix wright #lamiroir

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heart-forge · 2 years

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FAQ

Hi, welcome to the blog, sorry about the digital mess. You've found my FAQ, which I ask that you review in brief before you send in questions: just to avoid doubling up, or maybe just brushing up on some ask etiquette. Without further ado, here's some stuff.

Housekeeping

Where can I donate?

I accept donations through Ko-fi! Donating any amount gets you full access to Manor Hill when there's a full Manor Hill to access, as well as some essays about gaming and storytelling that I've written in a furious passion, and some character shorts. It also wins you my devotion.

When will [x] update? Where is the update?

So, my general rule is that I cycle through properties and love interests. If Manor Hill is the most recently updated property, then the next to be updated will be Bad Ritual. This is subject to my own whims, of course, but at the very least you can be reassured that the most recently updated title will not be the next updated title.

I don't do update schedules, mostly because this is a side gig. If I made enough money to live off of it, I could be more consistent: until then, I have to prioritize paying my bills.

Also, you may not intend it but this question does come off as a little rude. Lots of IF authors, including myself, are doing this as a side gig on top of other, real-life demands. As I suggested, a good way to hurry along updates is to donate and free up our time to write. If you just mean to ask what's being updated next, if something is on hiatus, or just to express that you love a title and want to know what happens next? Say that, instead of suggesting that you're looking at your watch and tapping it meaningfully.

Questions About Character Asks

Blanket statement for this category: don't worry. If I don't want to answer it, I will ignore it without thinking twice.

Can I send NSFW asks?

Sure, within reason (of course). Just keep in mind that some questions might prompt big annoying essays on gender and relationship politics (ie top and bottom is neither indicative of gender roles in a relationship nor is it the internet's shortest personality test), and others might be ignored just because I'm not interested in hyperspecific questions (ie things about the mechanics of sex, or sexual questions about an MC so specific that it toes the line of me RPing sex with your OC).

Can I sent angsty asks?

Sure, of course, but the same general principle of the NSFW asks applies here in a big way. It's easy to point at a very specific snippet of NSFW and think "that's a little inappropriate to send to a stranger", but people think a little less about sending me angst. If it's hyperspecific to your own OC to the point where I'm roleplaying stalking your OC, I don't want to do it. These games are supposed to be fun and I don't want to trigger anyone by inventing a situation where the MC is being stalked or harassed for the sake of doing a white knight thing with my characters.

If the angst is specific to the actual title (ie a bad day at work for BR, cabin fever for MH, or loneliness for Hybrid), then I'll absolutely answer! Same goes for OCs: I can talk about Trigger being touch starved or Siruud being emotionally closed off or Valerian being a desperate people-pleaser, or Mantis being deeply traumatized, but I don't necessarily want to invent trauma for them.

Title Specific Questions

Where do I put my complaints about Zed being nonbinary?

In the garbage, and don't come back. See here for the long answer, but keep in mind that this anon did apologise for sending the ask in the first place. It's just the most convenient write up I have for "I'm not changing your actual real life gender by making Zed NB so shut up and leave me alone".

What's the time period/technology level of MH?

MH is a setting of convenience. The general idea is that it's completely ahistorical—as in, it's not a period piece—and just made up. Maco has a kind of funky 80s chunky and unnecessary technology feel, Landow is a very pragmatic and functional technology setting, and Uresa is in the middle (ie MC would know of phones, but wouldn't be surprised that there aren't any in the manor).

Would Gnarl still leave if my MC did [x]?

This is a fun line of thinking, an angsty line of thinking, and not what I wrote. What I wrote was a Gnarl who always left, even if they felt bad about it, and regardless of whether or not your MC cried or was lonely or thought about them at all. This one is in the FAQ just because there was a stretch of time where I was getting different versions of this question every week, but unfortunately the answer is that there's no version of your MC who could prevent them from leaving because...well, you've played the game. They left anyway.

#talkForge #FAQ

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namboobieslover · 10 months

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Kintsugi: the beauty of broken things || MYG

Chapter 3

Summary: Yoongi and Minnie have been friends for quite some time now, almost... 15 years? 15 years since they ran into each other in that music classroom by an unlucky (or not) mistake. They've grown close, but both of them have strong characters and insecurities that will have to be put aside when Minnie falls into her own lie, risking her job in the process. They have 3 days to feel comfortable and make everyone believe their role as the young engaged couple or she is fucked :[

Pairing: musical producer! Yoongi x lab tech/science nerdy! f reader au; non-idol! BTS members make a brief appearance

Genre: fluff, angst, kinda slow burn (?), best friends to fake couple au, constant unresolved sexual tension, two idiots too proud to openly speak but pinning each other

Warnings: use of bad language, mentions of insecurities/low self-esteem, anxiety, trauma; light use of weed, little smut if you scrutinize, SFW

Masterlist: 1 // 2 // 3 // 4 // 5 // 6 // 7 // 8 // 9 // ...

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

CHAPTER 3: We on, baby.

Word count: 2816

I wake up with a pounding headache as soon as I open my eyes in the morning.

-When will I learn to stop drinking? - I fumble to myself while holding my head between my hands.

Takes me more than it should but I finally get up, my reflection in the bathroom mirror remembering the bad choices of last night.

After a long shower, I feel again like a human being. After brushing my teeth the unsettling feeling in my stomach is gone.

I don't have much time to get ready, so I pick whatever clothing looks comfier and I start my way to the bus stop.

The trip gives me a few minutes to check my smartphone, answering some unread messages from family and friends but especially Yoongi.

The day goes slow, really slow. My eyes hurt when looking at the little samples through the microscope but the silence in the lab is exquisite. 1-1 in cons vs pros.

Even though my mind is a little foggy, it's a good evening. I'm able to keep a stable medium for the cells to grow and it seems like the replication of the environment is going as it should. Also, the culture I did to explore the possibilities of a virus as a treatment is growing nicely. My research is on the right path.

I finish around 9:30 pm thanks to all my good achievements and I'm really hungry.

The place I’ve chosen to order tonight's dinner it's the one with vegetarian burgers near my job; a lot of time has passed since the last time I ate here. I pick my favourite (the delicious plant-based), for Yoongi the one with veal and lastly, a portion of potatoes to share.

-Hi Minnie, how are you today? -the grandma who owns this place asks me- I haven't seen you for a long time; where have you been?

-I've been busy with work lately; my routine has been hectic.

-It's noticeable; you have lost weight and it is unusual to see you with eye bags. Aren’t you resting enough?

-More or less; it's a temporary situation. Hopefully next week things will come to their normal rhythm. But I really missed your food Mrs Lee -I speak honestly while pouting- You are the closest thing to my mother's food in this city.

-And you are my favourite client so please, come visit more even if it's just to have a coffee. I find all your science things interesting, as does my Sandra.

-How is she?

-She is studying every chance she has; your notes have helped her greatly. She also told me that you are available to answer her doubts.

-Yeah of course. It's an honour to be able to help another woman to infiltrate this amazing world that science is. Sadly there are fewer of us than it should be.

-I appreciate that so much… -she gets a little emotional at my words.

-What about you? How is it going with the knee replacement?

-Rest of my body it's still old but that knee seems like it has its own life. My younger grandson, Taeyang, says that I have become a transformer.

After a little more catch-up talk while food is in the making, I start my way to Yoongi’s apartment; 10 minutes away from here.

The walk is nice and feels super fast while listening to my favourite songs. Lately, that has been Namjoon 's latest álbum, Indigo. I swear, that man is a poet hiding behind his hip-hop style and a smoking hot body that seems little when he has a clumsy day. The lyricism of his songs makes my heart flutter and I'll never get tired of telling him.

One good thing about Yoongi's work is the fact that I'm able to meet new artists he is friends with, and learn about other cultures, influences and styles. He always introduces me to them and usually, it is really easy to be part of their little musician group even if I'm not that well instructed in that area. The group we all have is "pussycians" since half of those boys are afraid to let people get to know them (strangely that doesn't apply to one-night stands and I lectured them about it) and I'm a girl + a bunch of musicians boys. As you can tell, the last idea wasn’t mine but from Kim Seokjin, the older of us.

With "Still life" at its maximum level, I finally reach my best friend's door. I struggle a little but when I'm about to open it, it does by itself showing a dishevelled Yoongi. He scares me and I can't hear a word of what he is saying with the earphones on.

-Holy crap Yoongi, you scared me to death -I struggle to say still agitated while taking them off - one day you'll be the reason I end up with a heart attack.

-You were noisy; it's not my fault. You didn't listen because of the music. You'll be deaf before turning thirty if you don't stop using the highest level.

-Don’t you feel like, sometimes, with some songs, listening to them doesn't feel enough to you? Like… I wish every single note were able to enter my brain and scratch it internally till I can't think any more.

-Umm… I guess -he agrees with me a little confused, but entertained.

I enter his house with him closing the front door after me. I go directly to the small table that sits near the sofa; the usual place we eat instead of the main table.

-Which song was that good? -my friend asks while tearing the sleep away from his eyes.

-Namjoon's "Still Life". His latest álbum is incredible; you have hard competition, boy.

-Indigo is cool, but maybe I'm a little more into J-hope's "Jack in the Box". Kinda old school hip-hop, dark, rock vibes… but that's on my taste.

-Same but reverse for me, so I get you. I really like Hobi's main songs and even the intro with all the Pandora thingy or Equal Sign, but it doesn't exactly match my taste as a general artwork.

I unpack the food while talking about it and its smell makes my stomach roar.

-Is this from Mrs Lee's place? -Yoongi asks, finally awakened.

-Yeah. Told me to send you greetings in her name.

-Oh, she is so nice… Is her knee okay?

-Perfect. Little Tae told her that she is now half transformer.

-That kid is my favourite Mrs Lee grandchildren.

-Mine has to be Sandra.

-Of course you love her; she is a little you. Maybe not like you exactly; Sandra is less annoying.

He says that with a serious face, but after feeling my death glare, he can't help but smile arrogantly looking at his burger.

-I'm so glad I spilt on your food; I knew that sooner or later it would be handy and deserved.

-Don't worry honey boo-boo, nothing you do can disgust me -he answers mockingly knowing that I didn't commit such an act.

The rest of the dinner is chill. Some dating show on the TV and a light conversation about our jobs.

Once we finish the delicious food he offers me some dessert but I refuse. A little liquor some friend gifted him? Not that much. But it's understandable; it is a sweet creamy one that tastes heavenly.

-So…going straight to the point: let's talk about the plan.

-Well damn -I say almost choking on the drink- what do you wanna start with?

-Maybe…nicknames? That seems to be easiest between today's tasks -he says looking in a notepad.

-Is that a list?

-Of course. When we talked about it I took notes before forgetting due to alcohol.

-Let me see it.

"Free Minnie"

-I will ignore that name but you are an idiot Yoongles.

-○—○—○—○—○—○—○—○—○—○—○—○

"Free Minnie"

☆ 2-part plan

Day 1:

✅️ Partying together and pretending to be a couple.

✅️ Wearing clothes the other likes.

✅️ Getting used to holding hands and side hugging.

✅️ Getting comfortable being close to each other.

Day 2:

☑️ Accord lovey-dovey nicknames

☑️ Comfortably hug each other/being near/share the same vital space.

☑️ Practice:

Introducing each other

"Love story"

Pecks (????) 🤮🤮

-^---^---^---^---^---^---^---^---^---^---^---^---^

-Yeah, the nickname issue seems like the best fit for an appetiser. Do you have something in mind? -I answer kinda surpassed by all the tasks for today.

-For me or you?

-Whatever.

-What about calling you “my little pumpkin”?

-Are you kidding?

-No… Isn’t that what partners call each other? Some girls I dated read romance books where they talk like that.

-Well, I don't know. I never had that kind of relationship.

-Me neither.

We erupt in laughter. None of us has ever had a relationship that serious, meaning this stuff is new to us.

-Let’s start with me -I offer as an ice-breaker- I don’t know about what other people like, or you, but I’m not into clinging words. Pumpkin… is too much. I guess the better option is something on the classical side: honey, sweetheart or even Minnie since nobody calls me like that in my working environment. ‘’Babe’’ is acceptable if we feel comfortable enough with it.

-I’m not an affectionate person in speaking terms so…that’s perfect for me, honey.

I feel a slight shiver running down my body.

-Ugh, that felt weird without the sarcastic tone.

-To me too -he laughs- but we have to get used to it in less than 24 hours. Do you want another glass?

Then I realise that my drink is long finished. This liquor is truly dangerous.

-Yeah, this is delicious.

-It was a gift from one of Jimin’s travels. From the northwestern part of Spain if I’m not wrong.

-I envy him so much… he is always travelling.

-That day will come for us too, I’m sure -he declares while handing me the now filled (to the top) vase. He served himself some whiskey.

-You better be right Min Yoongi -I menace while gulping some of the hot liquid- Now… What about you? What are your chosen nicknames?

-It would be incredible if you called me “sexy monster” or something similar. That has one hundred per cent of probabilities to erase any type of doubt.

-If I ever get so drunk that the only option to get me sober is making me puke, repeat that phrase word by word, it will work.

He smacks my arm jokingly.

-Now, on a serious note… I like when you call me Yoongs, Yoongles or Yoon. And that also feels personal, don’t you think?

-Can do the work.

-I feel comfortable with babe or honey/handsome. But not baby; that’s a little cringe.

-I agree. I hate that.

-What’s the worst nickname someone has called you?

-Like… ever?

-Yeah.

-You are not ready for that, and I’m not drunk enough to say it out loud. Ask me later -I answer flustered with a playful wink.

-Don’t worry I won’t forget. Also… you tend to match inversely your lack of shyness with the alcohol level in your blood. This is going to be a fun night.

-Bla, bla, bla. Let’s keep going.

I take a bathroom rest that also allows me to change my contact lenses to the glasses. I don’t feel comfortable wearing them in public, so every day I deal with changing between both at my desk at the office of the lab, all to fulfil my work protocols and also my social anxiety. A routine I got during the pandemic time with the struggle of getting fog in the glasses due to the mask when sudden changes of temperature happen (such as entering a place, the bus…).

-I’m back, babe -I announce funnily stumbling a little with the rug’s verge. Seems like alcohol is silently doing its work- Let’s talk about how you fell in love with me.

He chokes on his drink.

-Yoongles, I was talking about the false love story.

-I know, I know. My brain is working a little slower than usual and it has a lot of things to process.

-I was thinking that keeping it real is the best. The easier, the better. You know how they say that the best lies contain some truth behind them. We can just keep the original first meeting and the school years like they were, but makeup something about college years.

-Like what?

-Aren’t you going to add something?

-Liberal arts -he excuses himself and shrugs- You are the brains, I’m the unpolluted taste. That’s how we always work, sweetheart.

I roll my eyes.

-We can explain that in the urge to reduce expenses, we decided to become flatmates. Living 24/7 made us realise that we are perfect for each other and it was difficult, but we took the step a year after. How many years are socially accepted to date before getting engaged?

-Two? -he answers, as lost as me.

-Maybe… four?

-Isn’t that a lot if we had met in high school?

-That’s true.

-What about three?

-Three is it. Who decided to take the first step in the process from friends to lovers?

-Maybe you? You have 0 patience and probably your colleagues know it… Honey.

-Yeah, sounds like me -I have to admit.

-About establishing a relationship… that fits me better. You are impatient but insecure; you would have a hard time getting the confidence. Same for the engagement?

-First of all: I’m not that insecure -I start getting kind of riled up- Second-

-Before you continue, let me ask you something. For how long have you owned those glasses?

-Mmm… around two years I think.

-Then, how is this one the first time I see you with them?

I don’t have to answer that because he knows.

-If not that, then answer the following: what do you think about yourself? Do you consider yourself pretty?

Is this what a deer caught in the headlights feels like? How can be asking this so suddenly while keeping the calm front that characterizes him? He is so annoying.

-That’s what I thought -it angers me a little to see how sure he is about that premise- Do you want a refill?

I was so nervous that once again I had finished my drink.

-I think I’m ready to try something stronger -I challenge him.

-We on, baby.

A/N: Sorry I've been missing but uni has me on constant house arrest omg. These ones are shorter but we are getting there. Hope you like it and hope you have a good night/evening... Feel free to give some feedback :)

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sissytobitch10seconds · 2 years

Text

End of My World

Fandom: The Umbrella Academy Summary: After almost ending the world/universe three times, Reginald Hargreeves finally inadvertently got what he wanted. Viktor is now terrified of his powers and would quite literally do anything to keep them from coming back. Warnings: Suicidal thoughts, suicide attempt (failed), medical trauma, mentions of sibling death, mentions of substance abuse, addiction recovery, and depression Word Count: Ship(s): Viktor Hargreeves & Everyone

Archive link!

TRIGGER WARNING: The following fanfiction graphically depicts the after effects of a failed suicide attempt and goes into detail about the reasoning behind the suicide attempt. If these things could trigger you, please continue with caution.

A/N: I had the idea of Viktor absolutely freaking out if his powers were to return to him after the season finale of season 03, especially if everyone else has settled into their lives and is happy now. There also aren't a lot of Viktor angst fics, so I decided that I was going to add my own. This is kind of based off of my experiences with depression, which is why it might not match up with typical experience depicted in content. There's some good hurt/comfort mixed in here, so I hope it turns out good. Stay sissy and bitchy everyone <3

End of My World

An Umbrella Academy Fanfiction

A Viktor Hargreeves-Centric Fanfiction

By Sissytobitch10seconds

"Am I speaking to Klaus Katz?"

"Yes, who is this?" Klaus asked. He couldn't help the smile that fell over his face at hearing that name. In the new timeline, a lot of them had renamed themselves to escape the 'Hargreeves' branding all over The City where they had appeared. Sloane and Ben had chosen Sparrow, Allison was already Chestnut, and Five had gotten to pick a whole name for himself. Luther and Diego had taken the name of the women that they married. Klaus had chosen his mother's name, Herschsberger, until he got married to Dave, who happened to be transported forward like Raymond had for Allison.

"I'm calling from Benika Memorial Hospital. You were listed as Viktor Skripka's emergency contact. Is that right?" the woman on the other end asked.

He felt his stomach drop out from beneath him. He reached out to the form of his napping husband next to him. His heart was beating up in his throat as he felt a shock of anxiety unlike he had in years. Dave jerked awake and gave him a worried look just as Klaus answered, "Yeah. I didn't know that I was his emergency contact but I am his brother."

"I'm sorry to say this, but there's been an accident. Your brother has been admitted to the hospital," the woman said. Her voice did earnestly sound sorry for him, not that his brain was really registering it. Part of him hated her because she was delivering the news of what could be a tragedy to him. He was grounded by the feeling of Dave's hand clutching his arm in reassurance.

"Wh-what kind of accident?" he asked worriedly.

"I'm afraid that I can't disclose medical details over the phone," she said. "But we need you to come to the hospital anyway, there's certain medical questions we have to ask since at the moment Viktor is incapable of answering them himself."

"Alright, of course. I'll be there right away," Klaus said before the other line went dead as the woman hung up. He glanced over at his husband, feeling tears welling up in his eyes.

Dave sat up, immediately more awake now that he could see how distressed his lover was. "Baby, what's going on? Where are you going?"

Klaus slipped off of the bed and began to dig through the piles of clothes around their room from doing laundry the night before. "I have to go to the hospital, one of my brothers apparently had an accident. And he's either not conscious or not coherent enough to answer questions," he said. He pulled on one of Dave's t-shirts, which hung loosely off his frame in a way that he and his husband would have liked to explore had the situation not been what it was.

"Where do you have to go then?" he slipped off of the bed and began to find some relatively presentable clothes for himself. "If it's far then we're going to have to pack."

The ex-superhero shook his head as he tugged on a pair of pants and began to search for two matching shoes. "We don't have to pack anything. It's at Benika Memorial, in town."

"Isn't your brother married? Why would he put you down as his emergency contact?" Dave asked, brows furrowing together in confusion.

Klaus paused for a moment and let his shoulders sag. He pressed his hands over his face for a moment as he tried to push back all the memories of his siblings being hurt (and Ben dying) out of his mind to explain the situation to his husband. "Diego and Lila got married specifically so that they could have easier hospital and custody access, so they wouldn't be calling me. However, I have another brother in The City that you never met. His name is Viktor."

It took a second but the blond nodded in understanding. "Alright, Benika Memorial here we come."

"Thanks for being willing to come with me," Klaus murmured as he pressed a kiss to his husband's cheek. He hadn't told him everything about his past as he was pretty sure that if he did then they wouldn't have even got past the first real date, let alone a year into marriage. Dave did, however, know the majority of the things that had happened, including the fact that he had basically watched one of his brothers die.

"Of course, my love," he murmured as he pressed a kiss to Klaus' forehead. For a moment it felt like they were back in the first timeline, back in Vietnam when they first fell in love with each other. Of course, Dave didn't remember that time but Klaus still looked back on those memories of their moments as if they were his most treasured possessions.

They finished getting ready before they hurried out of their apartment down to where their car was parked along the street. Klaus was eerily quiet as they merged into traffic and went towards the hospital. Memories of Ben, beaten and bloody and whimpering, kept flashing through his mind despite the fact that it had been almost fifteen years to the dot. The dead-raiser leaned his head against the cool glass of the window to try and sooth the anxiety-induced flush in his face. He could feel his palms sweating and he was shaking just a bit like when he went to rehab and had withdrawals. He shuddered when the huge white walls of the hospital came into view, treasuring the moments that they spent in the parking lot outside while looking for a spot. As they walked towards the general admittance doors, Dave reached over so that he was holding his husband's hand in an attempt to reassure him.

They had to wait while other family members that had arrived before him walked up to the receptionist to ask after their loved ones. Klaus picked at the dog tags that still hung from his neck to try and soothe his nerves. He walked up to the desk once it was finally their turn, giving the kind looking man sitting behind the desk a wary smile. "Hi, I'm the family of Viktor Spripka."

"Right," he nodded as he tapped the name into the database on his computer. "Klaus Katz?"

"That's me," he nodded.

"You need to go up to the surgical floor. It's floor three, and then the receptionist up there can direct you to his doctor," he said, pointing towards the stairs and elevator.

Klaus nodded and then nearly dragged his husband in that direction with his desperation to get to his brother. He was still playing with the dogtags as they rode the elevator up to the surgical floor. The second receptionist sent one of the surgical residents to bring them to Viktor's room. Each step that they took added another weight to his chest. He could hear the ghosts of people that had recently passed away so hadn't yet found their way out and hospital staff that were comfortable there. The ghosts had only started reappearing a few weeks ago, but his powers were steadily returning to him. The buzzing of his power in his ears and the anxiety over his brother's condition were making it really hard to pay attention to where the resident was leading them. She turned and then pressed the door open so that they could both walk in.

He felt his heart skip a beat and his stomach sink down into the bottom of his gut when he saw the figure of his brother. Viktor had always been small, even when they were all little kids, but he looked like a child as he laid in the huge hospital bed. He was hooked up to several monitors and had two IVs, one for fluids and the other for blood. He also had a respirator hooked up to his mouth instead of the standard oxygen. He had bandages wrapped around the majority of his arms and around his neck.

"The doctor should be in to discuss his case with you in a moment," the resident explained softly as she let the door slip shut behind her.

Dave glanced at his husband after making sure that the resident doctor had really gone. He was able to grab a chair and place it underneath Klaus just as he began to collapse. Klaus placed one hand over his mouth for just a moment before he reached out and clasped Viktor's hand in his own. "Oh Viktor. What happened to you?"

They waited in silence, Klaus clutching his brother's hands and glancing between his face and his monitors to make sure that he was alive. Dave hovered behind his husband while trying to figure out what he was supposed to do in this kind of a situation.

The door opened as someone knocked on the frame. They both looked up to see someone wearing dark gray scrubs with a white lab coat. Behind her was a woman that looked oddly familiar, not that Klaus was in the right state of mind to place who she was. "Hi, I'm Dr. Lorem. I'm your brother's surgeon. This is Detective Patch, she's going to have to ask you a couple questions."

"Was Viktor involved in a crime?" Klaus asked, his head snapping up to stare at them both.

"That's what we're trying to figure out. I was called to do a wellness check on your brother earlier today and when I showed up," she paused and winced. "This might be a little hard to hear but I do have to disclose this part of the case so you can give me the answers that I need. I found him with his throat and arms covered in deep lacerations," Patch explained.

Dr. Lorem chimed in then, "Before Office Patch has the chance to ask you anything about the case I do want to explain a bit of his situation to you and hopefully assuage some fears. When he came to us he had lost a lot of blood. The EMTs had tried their best to pack the wounds on his neck and arms but his blood pressure was too weak since his heart had barely anything to pump around his body. He did code while our trauma team worked on getting his wounds to actually stop bleeding, but we were able to get him back with minimal drugs and CPR. The laceration on his neck was deep enough that it injured his airway so we had to intubate him. Hopefully in the next couple of days we can wean him off of it. We did have to do surgery to close a couple of the cuts because they were so deep. If you have questions about that then I can introduce you to our venous and plastic specialists who helped assist me in the surgery. We also had to pump his stomach since his body was having a negative reaction to some of the substances that he ingested, which is one of the questions I needed to ask you about. For now, what you really need to take away from this is that your brother is okay. He's struggling and he's got a long road ahead of him, but he is stable and recovering."

Klaus felt his shoulders sag a little bit when the end of the doctor's speech finally sunk in. "He's okay, he's okay," he murmured as he leaned into the touch of his husband. Dave had begun to rub soothing circles in between his shoulders to try and keep his nerves at bay while they took in the information from the doctor. He then turned his head up towards the ceiling, blinking away his tears before he looked back to the two women. "Alright. You had questions for me and I'm Viktor's emergency contact, so I can answer them," he felt a small swell of pride as he realized that his brother had listed him out of all of their siblings to be his next of kin.

"First things first, with the medical questions," Dr. Lorem said. "Does your brother take any medications, or has he been known to abuse substances in the past?"

The recovering addict had to stop himself from laughing inappropriately at the question. "For the majority of his life he was on anti-anxiety mood suppressants that didn't mix well with other substances so he didn't even take any other types of strong medication until he went off of them two years ago. I think he drinks, but he doesn't do hard drugs."

"Does Viktor have any allergies that you know of?" she asked next after noting it on the electronic chart in her hands.

"No, he lucked out on that one," Klaus forced a small smile.

"Is there anything else that you think we should know when it comes to his medical history? Feel free to give me any information that pops into your mind. I'm trained on how to sort through that kind of thing," she chuckled comfortingly.

Klaus went quiet for a bit as he let the sound of the respirator and the beeping of Viktor's heart monitor soothe the nerves bubbling up in his gut. "Uh, he’s about two years into his transition. I know he takes testosterone shots and he got top surgery a year ago. Other than that I don't know anything else about his medical history," he shrugged. "He never got sick or had any major injuries when we were kids. Oh, wait. About two years ago he, uh, got in a couple of fights we never got checked out for. He might have had some concussions and dislocations."

Dr. Lorem's mouth went small for a moment before she nodded in understanding. "As a doctor I'm going to have to gently reprimand you for not bringing your brother to the doctor when you should have. It never hurts to get checked out when you think something might be wrong."

"Right," he nodded. If they had been able to, he would have dragged all his siblings to the infirmary to get checked out every time they so much as stubbed their toes. After watching Ben die in the Jennifer Incident he had always had the impulse to be overprotective over them, but he had held himself back with the self-control he never extended to his addictions.

"I'll leave Detective Patch to ask her questions now. If you need me, let the nurses know and they'll page me," she gave them a kind smile as she got up and left the room.

Klaus took a couple of deep breaths before he ran a hand through his thick curls. Dave gave his shoulder a reassuring squeeze, which helped settle his nerves even further. It was like there were only a few things that were grounding him and every time they receded even a little bit the anxiety would spring viciously back to life.

Detective Patch drew up one of the plastic chairs on the other side of the bed from Klaus and Dave. "So one of your brother's students called the station today to ask for a wellness check because he hadn't shown up to a couple of the meetings that he agreed to. When I got there I found him and had to perform what first aid I knew before the EMTs arrived. I did have to force my way in because I wasn't getting a response and his neighbors were also worried. I have two sets of questions I need to ask you, alright?"

"Okay," Klaus nodded weakly. Having to deal with the ghosts was taking a toll on his mental health because he was sleeping less. The anxiety and worry for his brother was only serving to make him more exhausted, but he knew he had to push himself to help Viktor.

"Let me know if at any point you need to stop. I can always come back or you can come to the police station to finish giving us the information we need," Patch said kindly. She then cleared her throat as she started her questioning, "I noticed that you brother is trans. Did he ever talk about having any coworkers or neighbors that might want to hurt him? Someone close enough to him to know where he lives."

"He's never mentioned anything like that. The school he works at is very progressive and if his coworkers don't like his identity they don't really talk about it," Klaus shook his head. Viktor had only mentioned his school in passing and he was always talking about how much he loved his students or being able to pick what he wanted to play. "He doesn't know anyone that intimately in his orchestra. Not enough for them to break into his home and hurt him."

"Okay," Patch nodded. "Now, I hate to bring this up but the wounds that your brother was brought in with were congruent with that of someone that might have tried to take their own life. Has Viktor ever shown any suicidal tendencies or mentioned anything about not wanting to be around anymore?"

He felt his heart sink into his stomach and a shock of panic rush through him. Viktor had been isolated from them his entire life and then again when they arrived in their new timeline and chose to go their separate ways. He had been so wrapped up in getting to Dave again that he hadn't even thought about how his brother must have felt. "I… I don't know. He's never mentioned anything like that to me but it's not completely out of the question for him to… to have tried to… kill himself." It was like the words were being slowly pulled from him with a string, forcing their way out of his throat and past his lips despite his objections.

"Alright. We'll keep looking into his case but unfortunately if he was attacked there's very little that we can do until he wakes up," the detective explained. "Feel free to call the police department and ask for me if you need to, alright?"

"Of course, Detective Patch," Dave answered for his husband. The officer allowed herself out of the room after giving her work number to the aforementioned man. They were once again left alone in the room with Viktor, so Dave gave his husband a few minutes to process everything that had happened. "My love, don't you think that we should contact your other siblings to tell them what happened? Viktor is their brother too."

"Right, right. You're right," Klaus sighed as he rubbed a hand over his face. He grabbed his phone and flicked to the sibling that had been closest to Viktor before the whole debacle with the end of the universe had gone down.

The phone rang three times before Allison answered. "Hey Klaus! What's up?"

He leaned back in his chair, throwing his arm to where Dave was now sitting in another one of the uncomfortable hospital chairs. Dave clutched his hand and rubbed his thumb over Klaus' knuckles soothingly, which was the only thing that gave the recovering addict the strength to do this. "I have some news," he sighed.

"News? Are you and Dave finally looking in to having a kid?" she nearly squealed.

In the background he could hear Raymond reading to Claire, who had turned into a fanatic reader after her step-father's entrance into her life. His heart ached like a stone in his chest as he realized that the news might ruin her wonderful day. "No. It's not good news, I'm afraid. Viktor- he's in the hospital."

"I didn't think that he was going to have another surgery. They were too expensive or something," Allison replied, sounding a little bit uninterested.

"No. Allison," Klaus nearly whined. What he wouldn't give for a hit of the morphine Viktor was getting through his IV. "He, um, he almost died. One of his students called a wellness check on him and the officer found him bleeding out on the floor. They don't know much about the case other than that."

"Oh," was the only thing that came from his sister for a good three minutes. "Is he… is he…"

He let his eyes fall closed and ignored the tear that streaked down his cheek because of it. This was going to be the hardest thing he had done since he clutched the body of his dying lover in his hands in the middle of a battlefield. "He's not dead. His surgeon said that he's got a long road ahead of him but he's recovering for now."

"Surgeon?" Allison almost shrieked. The light happy voices in the background died down immediately. "He had to have surgery?"

"It's not like this is his first time going under the knife but apparently he did code when he was in the ER," Klaus began to chew at his nails to try and satisfy the urge to go and numb himself with whatever opioids this hospital had stocked.

He could practically see his sister's eyes widening as he spoke. She took in a sharp breath as she whispered, "Oh my God. Our brother was dead, Klaus."

"Not the first time that's happened," he shuddered as he remembered the blood soaked rug in the White Buffalo Suite and Six's (which is what they had taken to calling the Ben from their original universe) ripped up body. His bones and joints ached as he remembered all of the times that he had died during his training as well.

"Yeah, but we're not supposed to be fighting big scary shit anymore. We're just supposed to be living our lives. Viktor's a teacher for God's sake," Allison scoffed. "He probably has the safest job out of all of us."

Klaus bit the edges of his tongue as he tried to restrain himself. He couldn't keep the words back, finally saying, "He might be a teacher but he's still open about being trans at his school because it helps some of his high school age students."

Allison took in a shaky breath before she asked, "You think that this was a hate crime?"

"I don't know. Listen, I have to call and tell the others. I'll keep you updated on his condition if you want," he offered.

"That would be amazing. I'm going to book a flight out there as soon as I can so that I can help out. Do you think that he'd want to see me in the hospital or should I just… message him?" Klaus could almost see her pausing and her posture becoming awkward as she realized. Viktor and Allison hadn't quite made up since the (almost) end of the universe, even if they were back on speaking terms like they had been before his book in their original timeline.

The recovering addict took a moment to think. Dave's hand moved to take his own, grounding him again so that his thoughts were able to clear. "I think that he's going to need all of the support that he can get," he cleared his throat to stop himself from blurting out the other possibility that had caused Viktor's ailment.

"Okay. Keep me updated, please. I want to know everything, even the bad stuff," Allison said, her voice tight with worry.

"I will," he promised. He took a moment when the line went dead before he looked for the next sibling on his list. He wasn't looking forward to this phone call, not that he was looking forward to any of them.

"Diego speaking," the voice on the other end said immediately after the second ring on the phone.

Klaus winced as he could hear Chrysanthemum, Diego's eighteen-month-old, babbling close to the phone. He knew that the little girl most likely wouldn't be able to tell what they were talking about but she would recognize his voice and Viktor's name. "Hey Dee."

"Klaus, what's up?" his brother asked.

"Well, I have some pretty serious news," he glanced back towards the vitals of his injured brother to reassure himself that he wouldn't have to be delivering even worse news.

The other man went quiet for a moment. "You didn't relapse, did you?"

Klaus let out a little scoffing laugh. What he would give to be calling to have to admit that, however shameful it would be, instead of what he was actually calling to say. "No, but I have been thinking about it," Dave gave his hand a reassuring squeeze. "Viktor is in the hospital."

Just as he suspected, the name got a squeal from the little girl. "V! Uncle V!" Her words had gotten a lot clearer in the short amount of time that Klaus had been away from her. Despite himself, he felt a small smile tug itself across his face as he heard the adorable lisp.

"Mija, I need you to go find Mama," Diego said almost immediately. Klaus could hear some shuffling from the other end of the call as Diego passed his daughter off to her mother despite her protests about wanting to be held and be close to her uncles, even if it was through a call. As soon as she was away from the line, he asked, "What do you mean in the hospital?"

He rubbed his brow as he explained basically the same information he had given Allison. "But there's already a detective on the case."

"Shit, I think it was Eudora that got sent on that wellness check," Diego swore when he finally pieced the puzzle Klaus had given him together. The recovering addict felt his eyes widen as he realized that he had been speaking to his savior from another timeline, and that she was alive in this one. He had also forgotten that Diego also worked as an officer, though he was a beat cop right now, in the same precinct that would have been in charge of Viktor's neighborhood. "Don't worry. As much as I want to go and check it out for myself I won't. But I am going to ask if she has any details about Viktor's case when I go into work tomorrow. Is he awake?"

"No. I think he's sedated. They had to intubate him because he had a cut on his throat that hurt his airway or something," Klaus leaned his head so that it was resting on Dave's shoulder. The comfort he got from being in this close proximity to his husband was mixed with the reassurance of seeing his brother's chest rise and fall with each breath.

"Okay. Let me know when a good time to come and visit is. I'm going to tell Lila and figure out how to explain this to Chrys," Diego sighed.

"See you, Dee. I'll keep you updated," Klaus said just as his brother hung up. He took a moment to relax and not have to explain this to anyone else as he messaged Ben. The aforementioned Sparrow loathed talking on the phone and still acted aloof enough that he wasn't sure he should expend what little energy he had left on calling him to explain the situation. He was still their sibling and still deserved to know, however. After a moment of breathing, with Dave pressing kisses to his temple and the top of his head, he dialed Luther's number and then pressed the phone to his ear.

"Sparrow residence, this is Sloane speaking," the chipper voice of his sister-in-law cut through the ringing of the phone when the two lines connected.

He felt some of the tension in his shoulders drain away when he heard Sloane. While he hadn't spent a ton of time with her since they had all settled down in The City, he enjoyed talking with her more than he did his own adoptive sister. She was much kinder and even when she was upset, she always expressed her feelings by stating them out loud instead of having huge blow up fights like Allison did. She was much easier to talk to, probably the easiest person to talk to out of all of their siblings. "Hey Sloane. Is Luther there? I have some family news."

"We were actually in the middle of baking something for a work potluck. I can put you on speaker?" she offered.

"Yeah, that would probably work best," he sighed. He was going to have to tell Sloane as well, as she had gotten pretty close with Viktor as well. She was working in the same elementary school that Viktor worked at bi-weekly. She gave him the cue once she turned the speaker on and then set the phone down between herself and her husband. Klaus took a deep breath as he got ready to explain everything for the fourth time. "Alright. This might be hard to hear, but Viktor is in the hospital."

"Hospital? What happened?" Luther asked immediately.

"He had an accident. His wrists and throat were cut up pretty bad, he coded in the ER and then had to have surgery. He's sleeping right now," Klaus explained.

There was the sound of something dropping on the other end as Luther, predictably, froze while trying to process the information. "Oh my God. Is he going to be okay?" Sloane asked. He knew that she was going to be able to comfort his brother and help him deal with it all.

"The doctor said that he has a long road of recovery ahead but that he should be okay," Klaus nodded despite the fact that they couldn't see him. "I'll keep you guys updated. You're welcome to come and visit if you want, but it's pretty boring. And shocking. He's hooked up to a lot of shit."

"We'll be there to visit as soon as we can. It's going to take us a while to process all of this," Sloane replied. "Thank you for telling us Klaus. Be sure to let us know if anything happens."

He let out a small sigh when the call came to a close. "I will," he murmured as he hung up. The last person that he had to call was the person that he had been putting off since he had started informing the whole family. He rubbed his forehead with one hand after dropping Dave's while he searched for the last number. He dialed it and then pressed it to his ear as he let it ring.

"What do you want?" Five snapped when the call finally connected.

"Aww, is that any way to talk to your favorite brother?" Klaus cooed. It felt natural to slip into this kind of easy sniping back and forth despite the serious situation that they were in.

"You know very well that you are not my favorite brother," Five replied dryly.

"Mm, yes, we both know that's Luther," he clicked his tongue. "But I didn't call you to talk about family matters in that sense, dear brother of mine. I have news about Viktor."

"What about him?" came Five's immediate response. The poor man was constantly paranoid about another apocalypse or one of his siblings being hunted and killed by the Commission.

Klaus winced as he realized that he was delivering precisely the type of information that Five didn't want to ever have to deal with again. He leaned forward in his chair so that he was holding Viktor's hand while he spoke. "There was an accident and now Viktor is in the hospital."

"Which hospital?"

"Five, he's sedated right now. He had to have surgery and lost a lot of blood but he's stable. You don't have to come to the hospital and watch over him while he sleeps," he tried to joke like he had been before, but just couldn't bring himself to force the lightheartedness into his words.

"Which hospital, you asshat?" Five demanded.

He let out a small sigh of reluctance before he answered, "Benika Memorial." The words had barely left his mouth before there was a flash of blue light and Five was standing in the hospital room on the other side of the bed than them. Klaus brought the phone down to his lap and hung up the call. Next to him, Dave jumped and placed a hand over his heart to try and sooth his own panicking nerves.

Five stared down at their brother's tiny form, hooked up to dozens of tubes and other hospital equipment. When he turned his head up so that he was looking back towards his family, his eyes were wide and nearly feral. "What the Hell happened?"

Dave answered for Klaus because his poor husband had been repeating the information over and over again that day. "We don't know. Apparently one of his students called a wellness check on him since he hadn't shown up to his classes or tutoring sessions. The officer found him bleeding out on his floor."

The oldest of the Hargreeves siblings simply hummed while he moved to sit down on one of the uncomfortable hospital chairs. His face was tight and pulled in like he was thinking, but Klaus couldn't figure out what. Even before he had spent forty-odd years in the apocalypse he had been hard to read and understand, so it was basically impossible to do now. The siblings lapsed into silence as they waited near their brother's bedside.

---

The next several weeks were difficult for all of them. They came in rotations, visiting their brother every single time they had the opportunity to. Sloane had work all day but always did her grading beside Viktor's bedside as a favor to Luther who had to work for a lot longer. Diego came and visited every so often in between bothering Eudora and the other officers on his case to do more work. Allison had stayed with Klaus and Dave for the time that she was able to, but she had to fly back to LA after the first week. She sent flowers to Viktor's hospital room every couple of days in the hopes that it would reassure him that she did care once he finally woke up. Luther was in and out of the hospital room whenever he could be. Lila had only come by to visit once, but the sight of her uncle wrapped up in so many bandages with so many tubes had been too much for Chrysanthemum. Ben had traveled back from where he had been visiting art exhibits across the world to visit Viktor but hadn't stayed for longer than a couple of days. They all knew that as soon as Viktor woke up he would make a trip back to them. Klaus and Five were sitting vigil more than any of the others were as they were the closest to Viktor and had the most ability to do so. Five had taken time off from his college classes so that he could be there the moment his brother woke up.

It happened exactly twenty two days after he had been admitted to the hospital. Klaus and Sloane had just finished dragging Five away from Viktor's hospital room so that he could change his clothes and have a shower. Sloane forced one of the muffins she had stress baked into his hand along with the coffee that Klaus had gotten him from the cafe across the street. They settled into the uncomfortable hospital chairs as they watched over their family member.

According to the doctor, Viktor was doing much better. He had lost a couple of the tubes hooked up to him as he no longer needed quite as many vitamins since he was able to stomach the feeding tube. They also came to check on him less as he no longer needed quite as much attention. He was still intubated but apparently they were weaning him off of the sedation to see if he would wake up and be able to breathe on his own.

"Ben said that he picked something up for Viktor from his latest showing. He doesn't want everyone else to know but he is thinking about us," Sloane said after a moment of silence.

"Aww, how sweet of him," Klaus cooed.

Their oldest brother, who had basically been comatose for the entire time that he had been sitting in the chair, straightened up as all his muscles went rigid. He placed his coffee next to the muffin wrapper down on the table next to Viktor's hospital bed so that he could grab his aforementioned brother's hand. "Shut up, both of you," Five waved at them with his spare hand.

"What is it?" Sloane asked worriedly as she shifted in her chair as well.

"I thought that I heard a difference in his breathing," he murmured. They all went quiet, watching closely for any kind of difference in their loved one.

Viktor surged up on the bed, his eyes fluttering as he began to fight the intubation tube down his throat. His hand tightened almost painfully around Five's while the panic rushed through his system. He didn't know where he was, which was a huge trigger for him after he had been drugged by the government back in their second timeline. Sloane and Klaus both let out a panicked shriek when the noises in the room suddenly increased. Viktor's heart rate had also jumped substantially so it was closer to the hundreds instead of hovering around seventy beats per minute. Five stood up so that he was hovering over his brother while brushing his free hand across Viktor's face. "Hey, hey, you're in the hospital but we're all here. You're going to be okay. You have to breathe and calm down. The doctors had to intubate you, that's what's in your throat, okay? Just relax."

Sloane had rushed out into the hallway and got the attention of one of the nurses that was already heading towards their room to figure out what was going on. He hurried into the room and then carefully began to remove the intubation tube from Viktor's mouth and throat. Klaus had to physically pull Five away from their brother while the nurse worked on getting him to sit upright instead of just being leaned upwards. The medical professional then ran a quick test on some of Viktor's skills to test his motor functions. The doctor, who had been paged as soon as they realized that Viktor was actually awake, came in and asked him what felt like a million questions and ran a lot of the same tests to make sure everything was functioning perfectly.

The family was standing, bunched up against the wall as they watched over their loved one like he would disappear. As soon as the doctors and nurses had left, they swarmed him. Five was the quietest out of all of them, falling back down into his chair like the three weeks of poorly sleeping had finally hit him all at once.

Sloane moved so that she was sitting on the end of Viktor's hospital bed with one hand on his calf. She couldn't stop the bright smile that fell over her face. "I'm so glad that you're okay. You had us worried there for a bit."

"Little brother!" Klaus crowed as he wrapped his brother up in a hug. "Man, I thought that you were going to pull a me and have to go talk to the chick with the bicycle. Glad that I don't have to deal with your ghost."

Viktor blinked as he slowly reached his arms up and hugged Klaus. "I-I-I don't understand, what happened?"

"You almost died," Klaus supplied. "Well, you kind of did die. According to that nice doctor that was in here a second ago you died when you got to the ER and they had to revive you."

A lot seemed to be happening in the mind of their brother. He blinked at the three siblings as he slowly lowered himself back down onto his bed so his head was against the many pillows behind him. His face flashed with realization before, for the briefest of seconds, guilt covered his features. "How long have I been out?" he asked as he rubbed a hand over the side of his face.

"About three weeks. Your students brought some things for you," Sloane said, motioning to the posters from each of the schools that he taught at.

There was a highly colorful, glitter covered one from the elementary school that he taught at in the mornings every Tuesday and Thursday for the kids interested in early orchestra. Next to it was a smaller one that had quite a few personal get-well messages from the middle school kids he helped tutor every other Monday after school. There was another huge one that was from all of the orchestra students he taught at his high school. The last one was covered in little rainbow flags and 'get well soon' messages from the LGBT club he oversaw. "Love those kids," he said softly as a smile fell across his face. He cleared his throat, rubbing over the bandages that were still there. "Can I have some water, please?"

"Oh, yes, of course," she nodded. She handed him the glass that had been poured for him by the nurse that came to extubate him. "I'm going to go call everyone and tell them that you're awake, okay?"

Before Viktor had the chance to object about not wanting to bother anyone, Five sprang up out of his chair. "That sounds like a wonderful idea. Klaus, why don't you go with her so that she doesn't have to talk to our siblings alone?"

Klaus' brows furrowed together in confusion as he tried to figure out what his brother was trying to get out but chose not to. The last month had been so stressful that they were all acting a little bit weird. "Alright, schwester, let's get a move on," he linked their arms together and walked them out of the hospital room.

Viktor let his head hang back against the pillows and his eyes slip shut in exhaustion. Despite the fact that he had basically been sleeping for the better part of a month, he was still somehow so tired he barely had any energy. He jerked back upright when he felt Five moving closer to his bed next to him. "Viktor."

"Five," he replied, his voice deep and crackling like when he had first started taking his shots.

"Tell me what happened," he replied, raising a brow at his brother.

The smallest of the siblings felt panic begin to rise up to the surface. His face was pointed down towards his bandaged arms while the blood rushed to his cheeks. He didn't feel like he could breath and anxiety was clutching around his abdomen. "I…"

"Viktor," his voice was intense and serious. "You have to tell me."

"I don't have to tell you anything, Five," Viktor snapped. His anxiety was causing him to be aggressive despite knowing in the back of his mind that Five only had his best interests at heart.

"You really want to go there with me?" he growled. "You could tell me or you could tell the entire family when they show up to interrogate you. You know that they will. And, Viktor, if I find out that you've been doing some weird vigilante shit then I'm going to be your end."

He brought his hands up to his face so that his features were hidden away. "Maybe you should just end me," speaking so quietly that he wasn't sure his brother could even hear him talking let alone what the words were.

"Excuse me?" Five asked, going even more rigid than he had been before. He nearly sprang off the bed as he assumed a defensive pose, like Viktor was in any kind of shape to have a fight. "Would you care to repeat that for me?"

"I tried to kill myself, okay, Five?" he nearly shouted as he pulled his hands away from his face and looked to his brother. "I'm not running around like Diego did when he was being a cheap Batman knockoff. I'm a teacher at three different schools and I help the queer kids in my highschool. I have an orchestra that I play in too, so I don't even have time to run after criminals even if I wanted to. I just- I just tried to kill myself. Is that what you wanted to hear?"

With each word that the smaller man spoke, Five's eyes widened with shock. He sunk back down into his chair, clutching his hands in front of him. "What?" he asked after a moment of tense silence.

Viktor pursed his lips and looked away from his brother. "I tried to kill myself," he repeated.

"Why?"

Both of the brothers were left staring at each other for a couple minutes. His heartbeat was still ringing through the room and they could hear murmuring words from the hospital staff and their siblings outside. Viktor blinked a few times as he tried to process that question. To him it was so obvious, he had no idea how the smartest sibling in their family couldn't see it. "M-my powers are coming back," he answered with a small shrug.

Five covered the bottom half of his face with one hand as he waited for his brother to continue. The aforementioned man let his shoulders fall towards each other defensively while he tried to find the words. It was like his mouth was full of sand and cotton every time he tried to force the words past his teeth. "Every time I've had powers in the past I've killed people. When I was a kid dad had to drug me because I kept killing our nannies. And then when I went off my meds I literally ended the world three times. I thought that I finally had a chance to be a part of the family because none of us had powers and even when all of yours started coming back I didn't think that anything would change because we're all pretty close and well bonded now. Even though I still have to be the one to reach out first most of the time. I don’t care because we’re acting like a family and it’s so wonderful. But it's not like I had felt anything yet, either, so nothing bad could happen. But then I was teaching one of my classes and I could feel it, the humming in the background from both the instruments and the kids. Like what Harlan taught me to feel when I took his power back from him. I couldn't…" he stopped as he realized that tears were streaming down his face.

Uncharacteristically, Five lurched from his chair and wrapped his arms around his brother. "Don't- don't you fucking," he took in a sharp breath and stopped talking for a second. Viktor let his arms hesitantly reach up until he was hugging him back with a huge release of emotion. They were both crying as the older of the two continued, "I cannot lose you again, Viktor. I can't."

"But if I stick around I could take away Allison's happiness again. I could ruin everything. Lila and Diego have a kid, Klaus finally has Dave back, Sloane and Luther are so happy, and you're finally retired. I can't be responsible for ruining the lives of the people that I love most or killing anyone else," he shook his head. "Everything would be so much better if I just wasn't here anymore."

"Stop! You can't say that," Five pulled back so that Viktor could see how intense his deep brown eyes were. His lips were pursed and he was using one hand to wipe at the tears still spilling over his lashes and rushing down his cheeks. "The world would not be a better place without you in it. The only reason that you killed people before was because you weren't able to control it. We never actually gave you the training that you needed. Dad turned you into a bomb and then we never managed to disarm. The whole point of taking you back to the past was to teach you how to deal with your powers and then we never did that. The ends of the world weren't your fault, Viktor. We should share the blame too. Please… please don't ever try to do this again."

"Okay," he nodded in agreement. "I'm sorry."

"No, I'm sorry for making you feel like this was the only option that you had," Five shook his head. "This was partially because I threatened you, right? Fuck, how could I have been so stupid! Of course your powers would come back like the rest of ours did and of course you would be afraid of them after never having any other memories other than the end of the world."

"Five," Viktor called out. He was still so exhausted and it was made even worse by the fact that he had spent the better part of the last five minutes crying.

"Sorry," he cleared his throat. "I think this is something that my therapist needs to handle." Five moved over to his seat again. He held his brother's hand as if to make sure that he was really there and awake. They went quiet until Sloane and Klaus came back in.

Soon the other siblings that were living in the city had arrived and piled into his hospital room as well. "Glad to see that you're okay. You're the most tolerable out of the boys," Lila informed him. She was shifting her daughter, who was napping cutely against her shoulder, as she took the seat Sloane had been in moments before.

"Thanks, mi corozone," Diego rolled his eyes sarcastically. "Good to see you awake," he directed towards his brother as he filed in to stand behind Lila.

"Don't you ever scare us like that again," Luther murmured as he wrapped his brother up in a crushing hug. For a moment, Viktor felt panic shoot through him as the memories of the choking hug Luther had given him back in their original timeline forced their way into his mind. He relaxed when the normal, yet still muscular, frame of his brother reminded Viktor that a lot had changed since that fateful day.

"Don't worry, Five has already threatened me about scaring you guys," he chuckled.

The sound of his voice roused the sleeping toddler. She turned her head and then lout an excited squeal. "Uncle V!" she babbled as she tried to lurch from her mother's grip.

"You good to hold her?" Diego asked, taking his daughter from his wife and moving over to his brother.

"I always want to hold my adorable niece," he chuckled, reaching his bandaged arms to take the toddler. Instead of handing her over, Diego sat Chrysanthemum down on his lap.

"Uncle V," she giggled as she placed her hands on his cheek. "What?" she asked as she tugged on the IV on his arm, immediately getting distracted from her original goal.

He glanced over to Lila, who was looking at something on her phone and not paying attention. Out of the whole family, Viktor was the second most trusted with kids (Allison was first since she had raised her own daughter and Sloane was third). "Well, this is something that the doctors had to give me so that I could have vitamins to make me healthy," he explained. "I just needed a little help getting big and strong like you, flower."

The family settled down in the hospital room, much the chagrin of the hospital staff. It had been a long time since they had all been back together like this, despite them all living in the same place. Viktor, Five, and Sloane were normally overwhelmed with school (though Five for a different reason), and Diego and Luther worked odd hours. It was nice to be surrounded by family, even if they were missing two members and it was under less-than-ideal circumstances.

Ben had just arrived back in the city when he got the message that Viktor had woken up, so went immediately to the hospital instead of his apartment. He left his bag just outside the door so that none of his siblings would be able to tell what he had done as he stuck his head in. "Looks like you're stuck with us then," he smirked as he walked over. Viktor had been trying to nap while his siblings argued with each other over a game of War. Chrysanthemum had already tired herself out and was sleeping with her thumb in her mouth, despite having her pacifier attached to her shirt, and cuddled up next to his uncle.

"More like you're stuck with me," he tried to joke, but the startled look he got from Klaus and Five made him clear his throat and sit up a bit more. "I thought you were in Europe."

"I got back recently. Heard you were awake so I thought I'd stop by to see if I need to kick any of these guys out," Ben informed the other man. After he had gone to a lot of therapy and worked through some of his issues, he had become pretty close with a couple of the others. He and Sloane were still the closest since they had grown up together, but he and Viktor bonded over art even if they were into different types.

"Nah, they're behaving themselves pretty well. It's also nice to have them all in one place so I can make sure they're not getting themselves into trouble," he smiled at the other man.

Ben walked over and ruffled the other man's hair. "Without us they'd be completely lost."

Viktor stifled a yawn as he turned his head to the side so that he could try and continue their conversation. The taller man shook his head, "Sleep, man. You've been through a lot. I'm not going anywhere for a while anyway."

The exhausted violinist nodded before he let his eyes flutter shut again and he fell asleep. With Ben there the rest of their family was kept quiet so that he could actually get some rest. Eventually they all had to leave so that they could go back to their jobs or get some rest for the next day.

---

Allison was the last of his siblings to arrive. She had caught a plane as soon as she heard that he was awake, which meant that she arrived late that night. As soon as she saw him sitting up in his hospital bed while trying to doze off his medication she rushed over to him. She wrapped her arms tightly around him as if to reassure herself that he was really there as their other siblings had. When she pulled back she gave him one of her dazzling smiles, like how she looked at her daughter and husband. "How are you feeling?"

"Better now that they've given me my nighttime pain meds," he chuckled. He let the smile slip off of his face as guilt swarmed through him. He scowled slightly and said, "My powers are back, Allison."

"So? All of our powers are back," she whispered.

"I don't want to take away your happiness like I did before," he whispered. "I-I tried to… I tried to stop myself but I'm scared that it's going to happen anyway. You were right, you should have left me in the basement."

"No, no, no, no, no, no," she immediately shook her head. She grasped his hands in her own and forced him to look up at her. "I said that because I was hurting so badly inside. At the time it felt like it was true but now that I have Ray and Claire back I can see that it was wrong. It would completely break me if I lost you. Especially after everything that we've been through. Please never try to kill yourself again, okay? I knew that Hargreeves was going to kill someone and it still hurt so bad to lose a sibling, especially after Five disappeared when we were kids and Six died… I just, I can't keep losing people, and you're people."

"Even if my powers go out of control again?" he asked, his eyes flickering to meet hers.

"We're not going to let that happen. And if it does, we'll just fix it again. There are more solutions to problems that haven't happened yet," she chuckled. "And none of those solutions involve you killing yourself, got it?"

Viktor smiled slightly, a true smile. His stomach was still swirling with guilt and worry but he felt decently lighter than he had before. While he hadn't admitted to anyone other than Five, Detective Path, and Allison what had truly happened to him, he knew that they loved him. Based on the way that they all raced to see him while in the hospital he knew that it was true. They were his family and they wanted him to be around, even if he was the bomb that ended the world three times over.

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skylerskyhigh · 1 year

Note

6 & 13!!!

Thank you for the ask! ^^

6. Favourite line of dialogue this year?

That's a tough one! Here's plenty of dialogue that I was exceptionally proud of. But if I had to choose, it probably be this one;

"So now you want to end it all."

"It's for the best."

"Maybe. You know... my brothers are I were created as weapons. But dad saved us and made our lives better. He wasn't the best father, looking back on it. But he gave us a better life than the one we could have had."

Leon turns his head to look at Melody. "I'm sorry nobody was there to save you."

Dialogue from "His World". Yeah I know, that fic is very prominent here. But I just love it a lot. To me, it's amazing and I'm proud of this dialogue. It just shows the amount of compassion Leon has for someone who has basically been torturing him and his brothers. A line that conveys the amount of understanding and sympathy for a character that he has no relation to, nor he should gave a care for. But he does. This is coming from someone who, in Canon, holds a grudge and isn't one for talking heart to heart. Unless it's a big speech to hype up the team, he's not one for soft, emotional moments where things are quiet and there's no need for him to light the flame of hope. There is no way for him to help here. The choice has been made and he can't change that. Usually, that would have discouraged him and he would step away from the situation. But here he is, offering his company and sympathy to someone he fought.

It's a closing character arc for Leon in the story. His step in being a better leader and be there for the people who need him, not just running away from his responsibilities. A time for him to step up. A way to help someone who doesn't want to be helped. It's nice to just have company in their dying moments, right? A big part of being a good leader is to understand when someone needs something and help them. Not take over, but assist them. Melody didn't need someone to talk them out of it. They needed someone to stay by their side.

There's so much emotion packed into this line of dialogue that just feels right. I still feel a pang whenever I read this line and the scene it came from. To me, it's memorable. It's not as badass as "Round 2, bitch." But it resonates all the same.

13. Who was your favourite character to write for?

Leon is fun to write. But as time passes, I find myself leaning more towards Leonidas. I dunno, it's just fun making him be a seperate person than just "Future Leo". He isn't, and part of his character arc in the story is separating himself from Leon. They're not the same person. Time and experience has widened that gap. Leonidas can't be Leon. They're not the same.

I know everyone has their interpretation of what Future Leo is like. Some make him a depressed old man with issues. Some make him lean into the whole old man vibes. Some make him Leon but stronger and angstier. For me, I like the idea that he's still Leon in a way. Trauma weighs him down, yes. But that doesn't mean he would be stuck on that forever. At least, he won't show it. I try to be as closest to canon interpretation as I can- eluding my own twists and headcanons- and I can see Future Leo just following the lead. Besides, his time as a ghost gave him time to expell some of those angst vibes. He had Leonardo as company to keep him sane through it.

My version of Future Leo has spent more time in the present. He isn't yeeted back to the present and immediately has to deal with the identity crisis, raging guilt of losing his family, the shock of waiting for death then suddenly brought back to life, and the aftermath of the Kraang. He was given room to breathe and adjust. He was there to watch the aftermath, but he wasn't able to interact with it. He was just a silent observer. He spent months, unable to be seen or heard, except by another version of him. Whatever grievances or pain or other emotional outburst that he harbored was given time to air out. By the time Leon noticed him, most of the rage had dissipated. There's no whiplash of being near death and then suddenly being back to the day his life was ruined. There's no angst of pushing down his emotions only to explode on his younger self. He was given time to breathe. He was given time to adjust, however strange his situation was.

Then came the arc of finding his own identity.

Exploring Leonidas' character has been fun in the interlude. He's learning to rebuild his identity. He's taken to his second chance at life with the energy of a teen and he leans into his interests and responsibilities. Yes, he still has a lot of issues to work on- and something I plan to explore but from others perspective- but it's just fun to explore.

Leonidas is a warrior. It isn't clear from how he acts but that's just how he rolls. He's a parent, happily co-parenting Casey Jr with the younger version of Cassandra. He's rediscovering the things he missed in the past- like cookies and actual food- while also being grateful for the little things that he lost during the apocalypse. He's leaning into his interests, magic and mystic, something he wanted to learn but never could. He's creating bonds and carving a place for himself in the family he lost. He knows the family he's with now isn't the same as the one he lost, but that doesn't mean they can't be family.

There's so much potential with Leonidas. I'm building him up more and more as a seperate character. To allow him to be a different person. Until one day, he might no longer be just "Future Leo" and be "Leonidas".

Plus, using Leonidas to expand the lore of the world is very fun. I've given him access to mystic magic and he doesn't have the same problems as Leon did when exploring the yokai world. He's gonna be a fun narrative tool to use to explore the world of the Hidden City.

Thanks for the asks! It's very fun!

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killerlookz · 2 years

Text

𝐒𝐭𝐨𝐨𝐝 𝐮𝐩 | Edward Nashton x F! Reader (NSFW)

gif source description: After a completely unsuccessful date, your roommate, Edward, comes to comfort you.

content: 18+ !!! SMUT, porn with plot, dry humping, hand job, unprotected sex, m!overstim, m!virginity loss, experienced reader, sliiiight size kink, crying during sex/ emotional sex, insecure! eddie :( , kind of angst, fluff... lots of fluff, mutual pining, best friends to lovers, VERY BRIEF mention of past drug use, small mentions of Edward's childhood trauma, pre-riddler Edward.

word count: 9,334 (its a long one hehe)

This fic contains 18+ content, minors, please do not inreact

"Come on Edward, I don't ask for much." You sigh.

"Fine." Edward huffs, "I didn't want to meet the guy anyways." he begins to turn around and leave the room.

"Wait, Edward!" You call, suddenly feeling guilty over making him upset.

"No it's fine, I'll just lock myself in my room for the night." He says and you can't quite tell if he's being hyperbolic on purpose for dramatic effect or if that's genuinely how he took what you had told him.

"Eddie," you start, "I just asked you if you could please stick to being in your room tonight, and if you could please keep your door closed." You tried to explain, but he was already more than halfway across the room by now, and completely ignoring you.

It had been a while since you'd brought a guy home. Actually, now that you try to recall, since you'd been roommates with Edward, you don't think you had brought any guys home. Sure, you'd been on dates, you had been to other guys' houses, but anytime they'd try to go over yours you had a habit of avoiding it.

"I'm in the middle of redecorating, my place would be no good."

"My place is a mess right now, maybe we should just go to yours."

"The air conditioning in my building is broken, its hotter than hell at my place, can we go to your place instead?"

The little white lies would slip through your teeth every time going back to your place for the night would come up in the conversation. You'd never had this problem before- not with any other roommates- but ever since Edward had moved in, you'd found yourself struggling to let other guys over.

You'd thought about the scenario, bringing a guy home one night to hook up after a date, and while you're walking in the door Edward also happens to be walking into the living room at the same time. You think about the hypothetical encounter, of the man you're bringing home to- well, to put it bluntly, to fuck, and your roommate both giving each other awkward tight-lipped smiles. The thought made you cringe, you wanted to disappear into thin air at just the mere idea of Edward interacting with one of your potential romantic or sexual partners.

It wasn't like you and Edward didn't get along or anything. Sure, he was shy and a little bit anti-social, especially when you first met him, but you didn't mind. But the two of you have lived together for over a year now and you could say with confidence that he was really one of your best friends. Despite being complete strangers when you first moved in, within just a few months you had found yourself doing most things with Edward. You genuinely enjoyed his company, regardless of your friend's remarks about him being "weird" or "awkward" to which you'd protest and list off all the things that were great about Edward, and make some statement about how being weird or awkward wasn't even fundamentally a bad thing. Your friends would look at each other and smirk knowingly, almost as if they were hiding some secret language between their curved up lips. You'd ask them a dumbfounded, "what?", and their only replies would be nothing but hushed giggles and reassuring chants of, "Oh, nothing, nothing."

Your closeness to Edward is what made tonight's situation so much worse, as you suddenly realize that it was probably pretty shitty of you to tell your roommate where he can, and cannot be in the apartment when he's also paying for the place. You didn't mean to make him upset or to be demanding, it was just, that you on a whim had invited a guy over for the first time since you'd moved in, and the nerves were getting to you.

You'd been on a few dates with said guy, hooked up at his place once or twice- maybe it was three times. Things were seemingly moving well, he was nice, had a good taste in music and movies, and the two of you got along pretty well. Maybe your heart didn't swell up, and your stomach didn't flutter with butterflies whenever he walked into a room, but you liked him enough to try and see where things may go.

Feeling a little dejected, you decided just to give Edward his space for the night, and talk to him in the morning. It wasn't often that you would go so long without talking to Edward, but, you figured maybe that was what would be best for right now. You still had other things to focus on, like getting ready for tonight and straightening up around the house. You looked over at Edward's closed door and sighed, you repeated to yourself over and over in your head, "It's no big deal, roommates disagree sometimes, friends disagree sometimes... it's no big deal, it's no big deal," Trying to reassure yourself that it really was no big deal. You tried to think away your guilt, after all, you really hadn't done anything that bad, he'd get over it.

You turned back across the living room and looked towards your door, heading towards your room so you could get ready for the night. You stopped in your room for a moment to pick up your phone before moving to the bathroom to take a shower. While on your walk to the bathroom you text the guy set to come over to confirm your plans,

We're still on for tonight?

Yes ;) 7:30, right?

Yup. Perfect.

It's just passed 7 o'clock when you're standing bent over near the couch, fluffing up the pillows. You step back for a moment to observe the scene, you look back and forth between the two sides of the couch, noticing that the pillows to the right are slightly puffier than the ones on the left. You turn to the left side of the couch and try to perk up those pillows to complete evenness with those on the right but it doesn't seem to be working, you move back and forth between the pillows on each side but you just cannot seem to get them even. Your frustration begins to grow and you take a deep breath in to remind yourself that it isn't even that serious, he probably won't even notice that the left pillow isn't fluffed to the same degree as the right pillow. You exhale loudly as you sit down on the couch, picking up your phone to check the time, he'll be here soon, you note. There's a feeling brewing inside you, you think that it might be nerves, maybe even excitement, and it's making your stomach do loops. You smiled slightly and hoped that tonight would go well, that you had no reason to be so anxious about letting guys over, maybe tonight would be a big step in your relationship. The possibilities seemed endless.

It's nearly a quarter to 8 when you're sitting on the couch and wondering where he is, each minute passed your scheduled meeting time making your nerves grow stronger. You went to check your phone again, he wasn't concerningly late, but you were still a little curious as to where he was, you opened your messages to send him a quick text,

Running late?

Your concern begins to grow when it hits nearly 8:30 and he still isn't here, not even a text, you can't tell if you're more concerned over there perhaps being something wrong, or him possibly standing you up. No, he can't be standing me up, you thought, he told you, just a few hours ago he was coming tonight, maybe an emergency came up, you tried to convince yourself that he'd hadn't purposefully not come.

Despite your incessant words of reassurance to yourself, you still feel pretty god awful, maybe not entirely miserable, but upset for sure. You'd been sitting on this couch alone, in complete silence for the last hour. You told yourself you wouldn't cry, but, you seemed to be cutting it close. You were consumed with just this, overwhelming feeling of dreadfulness that you worried would follow you throughout the night.

All of a sudden, your phone chimes, and you jump in both surprise and excitement. In anticipation, you flip the phone over to see who has texted, but your heart sinks when you notice the notification is just from a friend. Still, bored and lonely you open the message.

Attachment 1 Image:

Hey, I'm out for drinks and this guy at the bar... isn't that the guy you've been seeing? Please tell me you stopped seeing him so I don't have to kick him in the teeth for being so...friendly with the girl next to him.

You glance only momentarily at the photo and immediately recognize it's him. The blurry shot encompasses too many details that you don't care to deeply analyze: the setting, the time, the girl whose hand is lazily thrown against his chest as her head's tipped back in a hearty laugh. You don't know whether to laugh or to cry or to scream- maybe all three at once

Your face grew red and warm as tears began to form in your eyes. You couldn't name the emotion you were feeling right now... you didn't know if it was sadness, anger, or relief, and you couldn't quite understand the deep feeling of embarrassment that invaded every crevice of your being. You couldn't even bear to respond to your friend's text, maybe you'd lie and say that you'd stop seeing him in order to save yourself the trouble and the humiliation of having to explain that you'd been stood up.

You tried to recount each encounter you'd had with him since you met, replaying the moments over again in your head, trying to think of where you could have gone awry. What did I do wrong? you asked yourself again and again. Was I too loud? Was I not funny? Not pretty enough? Did he find me boring? Was I too slutty? Too much of a prude? The questions seemed infinite, still, you couldn't pinpoint a moment that made it obvious that you had deserved not even as much as an insincere "I don't think things are working out" text.

You looked at your legs, at the skirt that was bunched up around your thighs, suddenly, feeling very insecure about being so dressed up with absolutely nowhere to go, and no one to see it. The tears finally began to fall from your eyes, one by one they poured down your cheeks. Your obviously emotional reaction over a man you'd only met a few times in your life only added to the embarrassment and shame you felt. You inhaled sharply, audibly, as you continued to cry.

Suddenly, a door creaked open across the living room, slowly, Edward timidly peaked out from around it. He looked over at you, his face suddenly dropping to a look of concern as he pushed up his glasses on his face.

"Oh god," you thought to yourself as you became aware that someone was actually seeing you in this state. You stared at him, wide-eyed and mortified at what could possibly be going on in his mind. You wondered if he felt sorry for you, or if he got some sort of smug satisfaction out of seeing you being stood up by the guy you had made Edward pretend like he didn't exist for.

"Y/n?" He asked, stepping away from the door frame, "Are you okay? Where's your date?" his eyebrows furrowed as he cautiously stepped forward towards you.

"I got stood up," you tried your hardest to laugh through your tears.

"Oh." He said, looking down at the ground, "I'm so sorry- I- you don't deserve that." He could barely look you in the eye as he brought his head back up.

"It's okay Eddie, it's fine." You say with an over-enthusiastic nod as you wipe away your tears with the entirety of the back of your palm.

"N-no it's not okay, y/n, look at you, you're crying," Edward says stubbornly, beginning to walk back towards you again. "Can I sit next to you?" he asks thoughtfully. You nod, and he takes the space next to you.

The two of you stare at each other for a moment, you can barely see him behind your tear-stained eyes.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Edward asks.

"There's not much to say, Eddie," you sigh and blink a few times rapidly to rid the tears from your eyes. Edwards's face suddenly becomes clearer as the droplets roll down your face. "One of my friends texted me saying they saw him at a bar, with some girl, when he's supposed to be here. That's it, that's the story." You answer dejectedly. You hoped you weren't coming across as rude, especially not after earlier, you just were at a loss of what to say.

"I'm sorry y/n," He repeats, "Do you want a hug?" he inquires with an innocence that makes your heart nearly melt. You can't nod 'yes' fast enough.

Suddenly Edward's arms are wrapped around you, the position is a little awkward from being on the couch, but it's comforting nonetheless. You take note of how tight he holds you, how his fingers push into your skin at just the perfect pressure, his breaths are even and calm, and everything about his presence is peaceful. You'd always enjoyed Edward's hugs, his affection in general even. It had become routine for you to seek it out: slipping into his room every night just as you were about to head to bed to give him a hug goodnight, laying your head on his shoulder when the two of you watched a movie late at night and you started to get tired, linking your arms with his when you were out and the streets got too crowded. Of course, he was your best friend, obviously, you found his presence comforting.

Still, for someone you had known who grew up receiving no comfort nor affection his entire life, he seemed to know how to give it well.

"I feel so stupid, Edward." You admit tearfully, choking out into the crook of his neck.

"You're not stupid." Edward began to rub your back reassuringly. "He's the stupid one. No man with a brain would ever stand you up."

There was something about the way that he spoke to you, his voice was always so soft, so sincere, you could listen to him speak forever. You couldn't describe how it felt, you couldn't place the word for it, the warmth that encompassed you with each word spoke. Sometimes you'd purposefully ask him about topics you knew he knew tons about so you could hear him speak for a while.

You pick your head up from where it rested against Edward's neck, pulling back slightly, staring at him. Had his hair always fallen so perfectly against his forehead, his glasses suit his face so right, his lips always looked so soft... had he always looked so... beautiful? You thought about those photo booth pictures the two of you had taken together on a day trip you had taken over the summer. You had hung them up on the mirror in your room, you saw them every single day. You thought about the sweet smile he had on his face, and how happy he looked, how every time you passed and looked at the photos you had this inexplicable giddy feeling coursing through your veins.

Edward looked you up and down and frowned,

"Look at you..." he started in a low whisper, almost to himself, "I'm sorry, I know this is forward, but you look... so beautiful tonight- you shouldn't have had to waste it." In an equally as forward move, Edward had reached forward and placed his hand on your cheek, gently wiping away with his thumb.

"Thank you, Edward," You sniffled, his small compliment meant everything to you at the moment, and a small smile cracked at the corner of your mouth. "I guess it's not such a waste if you think I look beautiful tonight."

Edward tilted his head, his jaw clenched and he swallowed hard as he seemed to struggle to maintain eye contact,

"Not just tonight- y/n, I think... I think that you look beautiful all the time."

Your eyes went wide as Edward spoke, you felt your heart skip a beat, even at the simple compliment and suddenly something clicked, everything made sense, and in your emotional state, you acted on impulse,

"Edward?" You asked, anxiously.

"Yes?"

"Can I kiss you?" You trembled as the words came from your mouth, worried you may have just ruined your entire friendship in four little words.

"Please." He said, almost as if he was begging.

Without even processing the weight of his response you pressed your lips to his, and he kissed you right back instantly. Something about it immediately felt right, all those butterflies you had been missing with the guys before suddenly entered your stomach all at once as soon as your lips met Edward's. You felt so stupid, this feeling that you'd been searching for has been right in front of you this entire time.

It was like all the breath had been knocked out of you the moment your lips met Edward's. His hand moved from your cheek to the back of your head, pushing you forward a little to deepen the kiss. You couldn't believe that it was even possible to feel like this, you hadn't even felt this euphoric that time you experimented with drops at a college party. Not even snorting the world's finest, purest cocaine could get you even remotely close to this feeling.

It was perfect, no, perfect could not even come close to describing it. You wondered for a moment how much experience Edward had to be this good of a kisser, you'd never seen him bring anyone home, nor had you seen him go on any dates since you'd known him, he'd never mentioned an ex's before. Yet, you were sure he had to have had some experience, no one is naturally divine with no practice, and despite you being the one in his hands now, your lips on his, you couldn't help but feel jealous of these imaginary people in your head that perhaps Edward had been with before you.

You placed both of your hands on Edward's cheeks in an attempt to pull him even closer than he already was. You knew it wasn't possible, you knew you physically couldn't pull him any closer, not when he was already touching you. The molecules that made up each of your beings vibrated too fast, too close to each other for there to ever be a possibility of being any closer to him.

It was when your hands dropped down to his neck that something within the kiss had changed, a hand suddenly found its way to your waist, gently pushing its way into your skin. You tilted your head to the side and your mouth parted slightly, and you welcomed the feeling of Edward's tongue against your own. The kiss suddenly got sloppy as you were overcome with overwhelming neediness. Your hands moved to his head where you gently tugged at his hair, making him groan softly into your lips. This small reaction drove you absolutely wild.

You find yourself shifting in your spot, both of Edward's hands on your waist now, you can feel his fingers pressing into your skin where your midriff shows between your skirt and your top. He's holding you tight, but not rough, like how one may hold very expensive and very fragile glassware; careful as to not let it slip from their hands and break.

There is something more salacious now about how your lips move together, tongues brushing past each other, gentle groans and hums slipping from your mouths. Edward's pulling you at your waist, trying to bring you into him as close as you can. You give in, lifting yourself up to your knees before bringing one leg around so you're straddling him. You wondered if this was real or if this was simply a dream, You mean- hungrily making out with your best friend on a Friday evening is not really your average night. It seemed, a little too perfect, you were half expecting this to be some sort of product of your subconscious, expressing itself as you drifted the night away. Any minute now you supposed you'd wake up with an ache between your thighs that you'd take care of, trying desperately to hold on to the last remnants of this feeling to get you off, before you inevitably cried yourself back to sleep. But the moments passed and you didn't awake, and you swore you felt everything all of it, it was all real.

You settled into Edward's lap, your hips perhaps pushing forward a little too enthusiastically. As your body moved forward you found yourself slightly confused, what the hell does Edward have in his pocket? The TV remote? There's no way that's his- oh my god he's huge.

Edward pulled back from the kiss, his glasses hung near the tip of his nose, and his eyes were wide, he looked white as a ghost, mortified.

"Oh my god- y/n- I'm so sorry." He began shaking his head perfusely.

"What? Edward, what's wrong?" You ask in response, nervous, was he not enjoying it? Did I just ruin everything? Is our friendship completely ruined? Your mind raced as Edward looked up at you with wild eyes and a slightly open mouth. He looked stuck as he began to speak, his mouth opening and closing a few times before anything could come out.

"Oh-oh, you- you didn't feel- um- you can't feel- it?" Poor Edward was trembling, his face going from a pale white to a rosy pink. You suddenly understand what he means, slightly upset that he had felt so embarrassed by something so normal.

"Well, it's kind of hard to miss." You giggle, trying to lighten the mood.

"Oh god-" he looked even more terrified, "I didn't mean- I'm so sorry."

"No- Edward. No- I didn't mean it like that," You shook your head, "It's just," you laugh a bit awkwardly, "You just seem to be pretty hung."

"I- what?" He furrowed his brows, he looked utterly confused.

"Oh..." You said slowly, pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose, realizing he didn't know what you meant. "Like your dick, it feels pretty big."

"Oh," He sighed, a small, proud, smile forming on his face. "I didn't make you... uncomfortable... did I?"

"God, no Edward, no- no- I was, I was like totally into it," You smiled wide, placing a hand on his cheek.

"Should we- Well, can we continue then?" He asks, his chest rising and falling quickly as it seems like he's trying to catch his breath.

"Please?" You say, a little desperately.

You lean forward so your chest is nearly touching Edward's and your head is buried in his neck. As you lean forward, extending your back, your already mostly rolled-up skirt rolls the rest of the way up to your thighs. Edward slides his hands up the now exposed skin, nearly all the way to your hips, his fingertips just barely graze the waistband of your panties as his fingers slide under your skirt. The small touch gives you chills, and part of you wished he'd just hook his fingers into the band and take them off of you.

"Is it okay that I touch you like this?" He asks shyly

"Mhm," You lift your head up from his neck to look him in the eyes, "Baby... " you start, "Can I call you that?

He nods enthusiastically

"Okay, then, baby...you can do... whatever you want to me." You say slowly, deliberately, to drive home you really mean it. Because, you did, you really meant it. As you looked Edward in the eyes right at this moment, you could say with confidence that you'd never been so desperate for someone in your entire life. You were working so hard to maintain your composure but you thought for sure the whole apartment complex could hear just how loud your heart was beating. It felt like your brain had gone into overdrive, your body was hot, and could not ignore that throbbing feeling between your legs.

Your few short words made Edward twitch beneath you, and the sudden movement had you bucking your hips into his. A small groan escaped his lips at the movement, and he tipped his head so it rested over the top of the couch, which indicated to you that he was content, so you continued, moving your hips back and forth, creating delicious friction between the two of you.

You'd never been so turned on by simple foreplay before, you wondered that since there was so little fabric between you and him if he could feel how wet you had become if you pressed into him too hard.

"Mmm'Eddie...," A gentle moan slipped from your lips as your clit brushed against Edward's erection at an, especially, pleasureful angle. "Fuck"

Edward's head picks back up to look at you, his glasses are foggy from the heat of his own breath. He doesn't speak, simply he stares up at you, mouth agape, whining with every movement you make. His small sounds only make you crave him more, you can't help but want him to be louder, using the full range of his voice to tell you how good this feels. You swear you could finish right there at the idea of it.

You grab one of Edward's hands from your thighs and place it right over your heart so he can feel how fast its beating.

"Can you feel how crazy you're driving me?" You smirk.

Edward smiles back at you, seeming pleased with how much you were enjoying yourself. His hand eventually runs down the side of your body, caressing every inch of skin on the way down, before resting on your thigh once again. There was something so sweet about the way he touched you, he was eager, yet somehow at the same time, hesitant and unsure. It was nerves you figured.

"Ah- stop, stop," Edward said breathlessly, his hands suddenly becoming rigid against your thighs. "I'm about to-"

Your movements slow, and quickly stop as soon as Eddie tells you to,

"It's- it's okay if you do." You had to admit the idea of him finishing before he even got inside you was hot.

"No-no, I want to last for you." He pants.

You nod, you won't argue, you know if he spares himself from release now, you'll move onto far more pleasureful things than just some over the clothes action.

Edward's hand slips up to the hem of your shirt, his fingers slip under it slightly, before, in a somewhat more bold move, he pulls your body close to his once more, by the hem of your shirt. Then, his other hand is at the hem of your shirt and he's tugging it off of you, exposing the expensive, lacy bra you had on, the one you'd originally worn for someone else, but truth be told, you so much preferred Edward being the one who got to see it over anyone else. Your top was tossed somewhere across the room, and Edward ran his hands up and down the curves of your upper body, enjoying the feeling of your flesh underneath his palms. He examined you carefully, making sure every inch of skin had been seen by his own two eyes, taking extra time to examine your chest, which, you had to admit, looked particularly voluptuous in this bra.

"Should I take off my skirt too?" You ask.

"Yes." He responds eagerly, you find his enthusiasm endearing. You pull yourself up from where you're sitting on Edward's lap. Your legs shake slightly as you try to stand yourself up, but you're eventually able to find your balance.

"Can you get the zipper in the back for me Eddie? It get's a little stuck sometimes- and you're stronger than me." You ask with a smirk. You're half lying- Edward is stronger than you, sure, but your zipper never really gets stuck, you just wanted an excuse to have him help you undress (as well as to boost his ego a little).

"Oh, yeah, sure."

You turn around and Edward places one hand on your waist, you notice how with his fingers wrapped around the front of your torso, and his palm placed firmly on your back, his hand takes up nearly the entire side of your body that it's on. His other hand makes its way to the zipper of your skirt which he tugs down with ease. His hands then quickly trace the outline of your upper thighs, his palms slightly graze your ass as he removes them from your body.

"Thanks, Eddie." You say cheerfully before hooking your fingers into the waistband of your skirt and bending all the way over in front of Edward to take it off. You were definitely putting on a little bit of a show for him, the way you were bent over made you feel like you probably belonged in that one scene of Legally Blonde.

You slowly stepped out of your skirt, careful not to lose your balance and make a fool of yourself. You came back up, your hair flipping slightly as you did so. You turned back around at Edward, who sat in front of you, looking dumbfounded.

"Y-you're gorgeous," he choked out, "Absolutely, perfect." He said as he once again took the time to examine your body. His complements warmed your heart, they seemed so sincere, so sweet.

"Thank you Edward," you blushed as you climbed back into his lap.

You lean into Edward slightly, resting your head against his shoulder, placing light kisses against his neck. His breath is ardent against the exposed skin of your shoulder as you begin to suck on the skin of his neck. He's only slightly slick with a very fine layer of sweat on his skin, but you didn't mind, you were sure you were the same. You lightly nipped at the flesh of his neck, before continuing to place hot, sloppy kisses in the same spot. You alternated between kissing and biting against multiple spots on his neck, breaking some of the blood vessels that sat under the skin, leaving small bruise marks.

"K-keep going, I like that," Edward said, wrapping his arms around your waist in a tight embrace to keep you close to him.

"Of course Eddie," You mumble against his neck. You wonder if he can feel just how hard you're smiling against his skin, or the beat of your own heart as it presses against his chest.

You continue to kiss at Edward's neck until he speaks again,

"Wait-" His hands are on your hips again, and he picks your body up from its position against his chest. "Let me kiss you too," he says eagerly.

You're enthralled by his enthusiasm to reciprocate your affections, and his general focus on your enjoyment as well. You find it sweet, most of the time, men hardly have cared about your pleasure, sex was simply an action that benefitted them, and if you got lucky maybe they could manage to fuck you juuuuust enough for you to not have to fake an entire orgasm.

You scooted forward in Edward's lap, so now your thighs are nearly straddling his waist. Edward sits up only a little, and suddenly you realize just how tall he is. Even with you sitting on top of him, his eyes are pretty much level with yours. It's slightly intimidating, but you like it, as his hands hold you firmly at your sides you feel, safe, protected, despite your exposed and vulnerable state.

Edward's lips eventually meet your neck, they're wet and warm, and you're met with a pleasant comfort as they work against your skin.

"Ah-" A small whimper escapes your mouth as Edward's teeth lightly sink into your skin. It's a pleasurable pain, it feels so good that you nearly forget that at its core, being bitten hurts. But the light pricks of his teeth combined with the warmth of his tongue was nearly overwhelming. He wasn't even touching you inherently sexually and you were still losing your mind at how worked up you were getting. "You're... so good Edward."

He hums contently against your neck, not stopping what he is doing to respond.

You made a note in your head of how you planned exclusively to wear lower cut tops for the next few days to show off how Edward had marked you. In fact, you were almost excited to get to show off the hickes he'd left on your neck, something about him having marked you as his, just drove you absolutely insane, and the fact he had ones to match, only made it more thrilling.

Edward's teeth bore into your skin harder than they had before, which caused you to yelp slightly at the sensation. You tried your hardest not to buck your hips into his once again, despite how deeply you craved that friction against your core. It gets to a point where you cannot take it anymore, you need him, and you place your hands on Edward's chest, pulling yourself away from his kisses against your neck.

"Are you okay?" He asks nervously.

"Never better." You smile breathlessly.

You bite your lip, your hands trailing down to the waistband of Edward's pants. Your fingers graze over the buckle of his belt,

"Can I touch you, Eddie?" You ask, looking deep into his eyes.

"Yesyes-please." His head moves up and down fervently.

You scooted yourself back on his lap a little bit to allow for some room for you to pull down his clothing. You unbuckle his belt impatiently. Edward lifts his hips slightly you can move down his trousers. Your fingers hook into both the waistband of his pants and his underwear and you pull both down to about his mid-thighs simultaneously. As you pull away his layers his erection springs out of his clothes, nearly slapping back against his stomach as its freed from the restrictions of the fabric.

You looked down at Edward's lap, at his entirely rock-hard cock. Needless to say, your assumptions from before were completely correct. You were a little, stunned to say the least. It wasn't that he was exceptionally huge to the point that sex would be painful and he would completely rearrange your insides, but he was certainly, of a completely satisfactory size.

You look back up at Edward, his face now a bright red as his chest heaves up and down, and he's completely avoiding making eye contact with you. You place one hand on his cheek, it's hot from all the blood that has rushed under the skin, you brush your fingers against it gently before moving them to under his chin, you pick it up, making him look at you.

"Don't be so shy," You smile, though, you know that's just how he was naturally, you want him to be confident and comfortable while he's with you, especially in such an intimate time like this. "But- if you're uncomfortable sweetheart, we can stop." You reassure, you know the situation you're in is a weighty one.

"No, don't stop, please don't stop," He says earnestly, "I'm fine," He nods, "Perfect actually."

"I'm so glad," You're relieved to hear he's just as eager as you. You return your focus elsewhere, "God, Edward," You smirk as you wrap your hand around the base of his cock, he's immediately whimpering from the moment your hand grazes the sensitive skin, "You're so big." you begin to work, pumping your fist up and down his shaft.

"You- you think so?" He asks, genuinely.

"Biggest I've ever had." You bite your lip.

You continue to work your wrist up and down at a steady pace, Edward's hips lift in time with your movements as he needily fucks into your hand.

"Like that," he barely slurs out, "Fuck that's so good. God you're so soft-"

The head of his dick leaks a small amount of pre-cum which you smear upwards with your thumb, causing Edward to sigh, completely full of pleasure.

You're having fun, more fun than you have ever had giving someone a handjob. Something about how evident it was that Edward was enjoying himself, his whimpers and moans, his soft words of praise, it was delightful. Seeing Edward so completely in bliss as he threw his head back and his glasses slipped down his face filled your heart with the most overwhelming joy.

Seeing Edward in this state also only added to how absolutely badly you wanted him, the throbbing in your core was absolutely unbareable. You don't think you'd ever been so wet in your life, and you were certain that Edward could hear just how wet he'd made you everytime you moved even slightly.

"Fuck, Edward," You moaned as you looked into his lap, watching as his cock began to twitch in his hand, signifying he was close to release. "Edward I need you so bad. Can I have you? Please, please Edward." You begged eagerly, he hadn't even denied you anything, you were just so desperate to have him inside you, you felt the need to beg for it.

"Yes- yes." He nodded, his head moved up and down rapidly as he panted, trying desperately to catch his breath. You removed your hand from him, ready to finally jump his bones. "Wait, Y/n, before we start- can- can I tell you something?" he asked, somewhat hesitantly.

"Of course baby."

"I, um, I haven't ever- this is my first time." He admitted, looking somewhat ashamed. You had to admit, you were a little shocked, not in a bad way, you were just surprised Edward had never had sex before. It was just hard to believe, he was just such an absolute pleasure to be around and, he was so, so very very handsome.

"That's okay Eddie- that's alright." You smile reassuringly, you're excited to be his first time, you hoped that you've made it at least somewhat special for him so far.

"Just- what if I finish too soon?" He asks, pushing his glasses up on his face.

"What if?" You ask, "Then that's okay, there's no shame." you assure.

"I just don't want to disappoint you, I mean- I know I will, but I want to make you cum to."

It was entirely endearing how focused on you Edward was, even during his first time.

"You won't disappoint me Eddie," You frown, "I mean this when I say, you're already the best I've ever had." It was true, you hadn't even gotten to home base, hell, your pussy had barely been touched, and you were already over the moon. Maybe it was because perhaps this was a long time coming, but the overwhelming joy you felt even just being in this situation with Edward was incomprable to anything you've felt before.

"Are you sure?" he asks carefully.

"Positive baby," you lean close to him and give him a reassuring kiss on the cheek. "Plus, there's more ways to make me cum than just using your cock."

"Okay," Edward nodded.

"Can I...?"

"Yes."

You smirked, and sat up on your knees a little so you could adjust your panties. Though, before you could get to it, Edward had pushed two fingers into the crotch of your underwear. You moaned softly as a gentle finger brushed against your clit, his fingers slid against your soaked folds as he hooked his fingers under the fabric and pulled it aside. Edward seemed slightly astonished at how wet you were, as were you. The air from the apartment was cool as it met your wet cunt, causing you to shiver slightly.

"I didn't know it was usual to get this wet," Edward said, a little surprised.

"I don't usually," You admitted, and then leaned forward so your lips barely grazed the lobe of his ear, "This is all from you."

You couldn't see Edward's reaction to what you had said but, you did find his hands on your hips once again, guiding you slowly to him. Eventually you felt the head of his cock brush against your clit, and you swear you were already ready to cum right then and there. It took some slight manuvering, his tip sliding between your wet folds towards your entrance. Eventually, you felt that you were properly aligned and you sighed, your anticipation not able to take it anymore, and you began to slide down his cock.

You were a mess from the moment his tip met your entrance, your fingers dug into his torso at the pleasurful stretching sensation.

"Fuck, Eddie," You moaned nearly immediately. Edward was able to enter you with complete ease, with how wet you were and all.

"Fuck- you're so-" Edward groaned, "So... so... wet, and warm, fuck." he looked like he was losing his mind, but you absolutely were too. You were both breathless by the time he had entered you completely, you couldn't believe how deep inside you he was. Still, despite the size, again, it was not to a point where it was painful. He was, just right.

You had to regain your composure before you could lift your hips up again. You took a deep breath before sitting up on your knees once more,

"Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck," You moaned at the sensation of Edward's length moving against your walls. Then you lowerd yourself once more, cock once again burrying itself into your cunt. As Edward bottomed out into you you stayed there for a moment once more, rocking your hips back and forth, really savoring the feeling of him inside of you. "SHIT." you exclaimed as you bent your hips at just the right angle for him to hit that perfect spot inside you.

Meanwhile, Edward seems to be in an equal amount of bliss. Actually, you noted he looked, sort of like he was having an exorcism. His mouth wide open, moaning, his head and eyes both rolled back as his body shook.

You began to pick up the pace a little, you raising and lowering your hips at an increasingly faster rate. Edward's hands only lightly guided you up and down his shaft, as, you were doing most of the work. But, you didn't mind that, not at all, how could you when he looked like that. Despite your previous notion of how he seems as if he's getting a demon exorcized out of him, he still, looked like an angel. The way his shaggy hair framed his face, the way his fogged glasses slipped down the perfectly curved bridge of his nose, how the warm flush of red in his skin perfectly complemented his soft, roud, cheeks.

"You're so pretty Eddie," You slur, "So soo pretty Eddie"

"You're..." His hands slide up from your hips to just under your tits, "God- fuck, you're so beautiful." He's breathless, panting lounder than a dog after playing in the sun. "I can't b-believe I have you like this right now" the words fall from his mouth lazily.

"It's my pleasure, handsome," You lean over, pressing your chest to his, and letting your head fall against his shoulder. His hips suddenly buck into you, meeting your pace, and that combined with the new angle you're situated in, makes you cry out in pleasure. Your shrieks are only stiffled by the skin of Edward's neck. "Please, please keep doing that Eddie, fuck, Eddie." You cannot get enough of the feeling as you suddenly start to feel something bubbling in your lower stomach. You couldn't have been coming close this soon? Could you?

"Fuck" Edward suddenly exclaims, making you life your head. "I'm- I'm gonna- fuck- this feels too good- I can't-"

"Go ahead, cum for me baby." You urge, you can feel his cock throbbing inside of you, which only adds to your neediness, the pressure in your abdomen only growing more and more noticable with the passing seconds.

Edward sputters out a long string of expletives as the movements of his hips become lazy.

"God, I'm-" and suddenly he's finishing inside of you, it's warm, and any remaining friction between the two of you completely disappears as he does so, your combined wetness makes your slowing movements entirely fluid. His mouth is wide, and he is moaning insesentally while simultaneously trying to remember how to breathe. Despite being on top of him, the weight of your body cannot stop the shake in his legs as he empties into you. You cannot remember the last time you'd let someone finish inside you, despite being on the pill, you'd always made everyone you were with use protection, it was a mental thing. But Edward, you didn't mind, in fact you enjoyed the feeling of him emptying inside you, you wanted him to fill you up. And full you were as you slowed your hips, ready to stop.

"No- no," Edward can barely gasp out, his fingers holding onto your sides so hard you're sure they'll leave bruises. "Keep going, I want you to cum too."

"Eddie- are you sure?" You ask, noting how clearly spent he was, "I don't want to kill you baby."

"No, keep going," Edward places his head into the crook of your neck, "If you kill me, at least I'll die happy." He says which causes the two of you to laugh slightly.

"Okay baby, thank you." You say, appreciative that he's ready to take this overstiumlation, especially on his first time, to let you finish too. "I'm already, so close." You moan as your hips begin to pick up speed again.

The tightening in your abdomen has not gone away, it only increases as you continue to move your hips up and down. You're breathless by now, and your legs begin to shake. Every, single, time, your hips meet Edward's his tip hits the perfect spot, and you're whining so loud you're sure you'll be getting a noise complaint any moment now.

The wave of pleasure that's begining to fall over you is nothing like you've ever felt before, your brain is so fogged up from all the pleasure you're experiencing you don't even think you could get a coherent sentence out. You suddenly understood the phrase "Getting your brains fucked out" because you were certain after this you'd have none left.

Edward's even more of a mess, clearly completely overstimulated as tears begin to form in his eyes. You're looking at him, concerned, wondering if you should stop.

"Keepgoingkeepgoing," He urges,

You're close, so close, you feel like you're going to explode.

"Edward, fuck fuck fuck I'm gonna cum-" You essentially scream as your fingers dig into his torso. You're grabbing at him above his shirt, but your nails have sunk in so deep you worry you've perhaps broken skin. The pressure in your lower stomach has reached it's breaking point, and your inner thighs are pulsing as you begin to unwind.

"Yes- ah- come on" Edward whines, only egging on your impending orgasm.

"I'm- I'm-" You barely shriek out before you're there, "Fuck!" You begin to release, you're shaking and your hips are twitching as your pussy clenches around Edward. You wonder if he can feel the throbbing of your cunt against him, or if he's noticed just how wet it's gotten from you cumming so hard.

You sink into Edward as the last of your orgasm comes to an end, your legs are twitching wildly and you cannot even begin to try to lift yourself up from your spot on top of him.

Maybe it's from the overwhelming pleasure, or the fact that you just had sex with someone who meant so much to you, but you felt yourself about to cry.

"Oh , Edward," You whimpered into his neck as you tried to swallow the lump in your throat. It didn't work, the lump remained, urging you to let your emotions out. You slowly release your nails from his torso, hoping you hadn't hurt him too much, unless he was into that sort of thing, then you hoped you'd hurt him just enough. You were soon wrapping your arms around his back, pulling him into a bone crushing embrace.

Edward's arms snaked around you as well, as he pulled you even further against him, the small movement making him shift slightly inside of you, causing you to whine at the small stimulation.

"Sorry-sorry," He says, his words are choked and shaky, and his lack of breath is obvious.

You sniffle into Edward's neck as you start to cry just a little. You'd never cried after sex, this was a first. You couldn't even understand why you were crying, the emotions that were penetrating your brain right now were just way too much.

You picked your head up a little, to look at Edward, and you hoped he wouldn't question the tears that stained your eyes. To your surprise, when your gaze met his, you had noticed a few tear drops that had streamed down Edward's cheeks, and you realized he was crying as well. Which, made you want to sob even harder.

"God, Edward," You gasp, before pressing your lips to his. The kiss is breathless, the two of you still exhasperated from before. Still, you never, ever wanted to leave this moment, you felt so safe in your vulnerability right now. You had no clue of Edward's motives for having sex with you; maybe he'd just gotten horny, or maybe he genuinely liked you in a more romantic sort of way. Still, despite that unknown, in his protective hold, you'd never felt more safe, more taken care of, than you did in this very moment.

"Should we uh- get cleaned up?" Edward asks, breaking away from the kiss.

"Oh, yeah, yeah," You sniffle.

You slowly, lift yourself off of Edward, the feeling of him slidling out of your spent cunt made your head fuzzy with overstimutation. Still, you'd lifted up eniugh to where he was completely out of you, his dick, now limp, falling into his lap. You whined slightly at the loss of contact, now empty, you could feel Edward's finish leaking out of you, running down the inside of your upper thighs.

You placed your hands on either side of Edward and tried to steady yourself enough to stand up, your legs still wavering slightly as your feet touched the floor. Edward reached his hands out to grab you as you straightened yourself up to help you keep your balance. Once you were sure you were not going to fall, you fixed your panties so they covered you completely once more, and headed for your bathroom.

A few moments later your cleaned up, laying in your bed, Edward at your side, the two of you aren't touching, only lying next to each other, above the sheets, staring up at the ceiling of the dim room.

"Thank you for letting me be your first time." You say.

"I- I wouldn't have wanted it to be anyone else."

"Really?"

"Y-yeah." He nods, "I suppose we've kind of... gotten past the point of embarassment now that you've uh- seen my dick and all-" He chuckles nervously, "So, if I'm just being completely honest- and please don't hate me for this- I've thought about it, a lot, you know. This."

A small smile forms at your lips at this admission as you look over towards Edward, it was flattering, especially coming from Edward.

"Well," you start, "Then, I'm extra glad I was able to give you what you want."

Edward looks over and smiles back at you, he looks like he's about to attempt to speak again, but he doesn't. Suddenly his smile drops and he looks worried,

"But please don't take that as I only wanted to be friends with you because I wanted to have sex with you because that is not the case. I really enjoy your company, you're the greatest person I ever met, and I really like you a lot, so please don't think otherwise," He says, the words fire out of his mouth at a nervous, rapid, pace, and you furrow your eyebrows as you try to understand each shaky word.

"You think I'm the greatest person you've ever met?" You ask, dumbfounded, a giddy smile forming at the corners of your mouth. You feel your cheeks get hot and you're sure you're bright red in the face right now.

"Yeah, you're like, the coolest." He looks back up at the ceiling, "You're... so sweet, and funny, you're beautiful- and, most of all, I guess, you gave me a chance- no one has ever given me a chance."

You don't know whether to smile or cry upon hearing Edward's words. He had told you, a few times, some stories of his childhood, the conditions he grew up with, how he'd never felt wanted ever in his life. Some of the things he had told you were so gutwrenching that, despite you having acted strong in the moment in order to comfort him, you had secretly cried over when you were alone.

"Oh Edward, thank you..." You scooch a little closer to him, placing an arm over his midsection, and lying your head on his chest. "I wish more people had given you a chance."

"It's alright, I guess," He places an arm around your back, "I'm just grateful that at least you did."

"I am too," You admit, "I'm sorry about before, essentially telling you to lock yourself in your room."

"No, don't apologize, I overreated."

"I don't think so Eddie, this is your house too. I- it's just- well if we're confessing things now, I guess- I was just nervous, I'd never brought a guy into our home before and- Edward, that's because of you."

"Because of me? I never said you couldn't-"

"No- not like that just, I think, I knew, that if I brought someone home, and then I saw you, I wouldn't have wanted them anymore." You sigh, it felt good, coming to the realization of why you'd truly been so anxious about bringing guys home. "Because... I knew- that- if I was reminded of you, I'd remember how no one could ever live up to... well... you." You confess.

"Live up to me?"

"Yeah," you sigh, "Edward, you're like the pefect man, seriously, I don't know how you haven't been like- drowning in pussy." You giggle. Edward laughs a long a little as well.

"You really think so? You know, you could do better."

"You're everything I could ever want. There is no better."

You could hear how Edward's heartrate increased from your spot on his chest, and if you were being honest, you're heart was beating out of your chest too.

"Does this mean, maybe, you'd uh- want to be my girlfriend- or something?" He asked, his voice faltering slightly.

"Are you asking me out Edward?" You smile.

"Y-yeah, I think so."

You sit up from where you're laid on Edward's chest, and turn so you're looking down at him.

"I'd love to be your girlfriend Eddie." You nod, overcome with the most overbearing joy.

You place both of your hands on Edward's cheeks and lean into him, placing a kiss directly on his lips. Both of Edward's arms wrap around your back, and he pulls you back down to his chest, as both of your bodies tangle up in eachother, and you feel his warm embrace around you, there's only one thing you're thinking, "Mine."

#edward nashton #edward nashton one shot #edward nashton fic #edward nashton x reader #paul dano #edward nashton smut #dano! riddler x reader #dano!riddler #the riddler x reader

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namjooningelsewhere · 2 years

Text

War Of The Hearts: #4B

✽Pairing - OT7 x reader (DJ) and OT7 x Lily

✽Word Count - 3.4k

✽Ratings - 18+

✽Genre(s) - Mafia Au, Angst , Fluff, mentions of smut.

✽Trigger Warnings - Mentions of Death, Mentions of Trauma , minor alcohol consumption, mentions of torture and shootouts and mentions of bloodshed, Mentions of Drugs, Attempted Murder, A little manipulative behavior, A shootout, a lot of cursing.

✽Summary - You’ve been lurking in the shadows, protecting the seven of Bangtan even if it means you must give your own life. After all, that’s what you do when you are in love with someone irrevocably. That pain seems to be minuscule in light of their safety. But it was never about you, for all you are is a speck of dust in the universe they have created for them and their girlfriend. Your heart’s at war, but it’s fine, you can smile through the pain as long as it means they smile- for her.

✽A/N : So this part is a little flashback of what happened after Yoongi shot DJ, and a little from when she left to get Ivanov. I thought a little flashback on the boys pov would be nice. Let me know if you want to be added to the taglist.

✽Taglist : @bri-mal @2ne1unni @shatzkrinslinzki @zae007live, @gukieater @tinyoonsblog @skylievin @2ne1unni @lovelgirl22 @euphakid @embrace-themagic @didi-9310 @loisje123 @iamhereforbts @silscintilla @2ne1unni @rp171198 @aboredboredboreduniverse @blaaiissee @top-crop @sa7kou @chhungi-bawihtlung @aquariushoesss @definitelythinkimanalien

@juju-227592 @rinkud @aria-grace-scott @theestrangeddreamer @babycoffeefire (The ones tagged in bold arent getting tagged.)

✽Part One Here ✽Part Two Here ✽Part Three Here ✽Part Four Here

“DJ wake up.” Yoongi gently shook your cheek, but those hands were trembling hard. What is mind reeled back to the second he saw DJ aiming a gun at him. There was no way he could have figured out she was aiming at someone who was behind him.

He shook you again, But you didn't respond. Blood was seeping through your abdomen to his hands, Yoongi was losing his calm, He heard footsteps in front of him, The others were coming running towards him.

“Yoongi what happened?” Jin asked, His eyes nearly bulging out at the sight of you laying in his arms and Yoongi’s gun right next to your knees.

“Somebody was about to shoot me, DJ saw it and she aimed the gun at that person and i thought she–”

“Was about to shoot you?” Namjoon Uttered the words in utter shock, He didn't know what to make of this situation. As a leader of Bangtan, Namjoon had been into the trickiest situations but never in one like this. It would be a question, A big sticky situation. How the hell was he supposed to justify this lest anything happened to DJ.

“Let's take her to the hospital first, We can figure out the details later.” Namjoon quickly made a movement to help Yoongi with DJ but Yoongi stopped him, carrying DJ himself.

They quickly started their cars and they had one of the vans to put DJ, Yoongi didn't let go of Dj even for a single minute keeping her close to his chest.

“Where is Jeh? I didn't see him at the party either and Dj was nowhere to be seen either.”

“Both of them were not there either.”

“Hyung she will be fine.” Yoongi nodded slightly but he was still shocked, shocked from all the events of today.

“She saved my life.” Yoongi clasped your hand a little tighter, You were breathing a little more shallow, The blood still seeping through although a little slow. Yoongi's white shirt was all red down from the chest.

“Speed the bloody car Hoseok, We aren't on a picnic.” Hoseok placed his legs hard on the gas pedal at yoongi’s outburst.

They reached the hospital and Yoongi literally ran with you in his arms. They entered the lobby through the private entrance and the doctors immediately rushed to your aid, recognising Bangtan.

The doctors wheeled you in, And Yoongi stood outside the room with the rest of the others waiting anxiously.

“We have to take her for the surgery, The bullet needs to be taken out before there is any infection.” The doctor's statement increased the already heavy tension in the corridor and Yoongi sat down on one of the chairs with a thud.

“Doctor, do what you have to.” Taehyung was the first one to speak up, The rest of them agreed with him, The doctor got to work immediately, instructing prep instructions to his staff.

Everybody took a seat, some worried sick, Some confused and Yoongi still shaken.

“Yoongi Hyung, Tell us what happened?” Jungkook asked Yoongi, who looked at the youngest with tears in his eyes, and the younger squeezed his shoulder lightly assuring him it was okay.

“I was at the balcony on the first floor, A car came rushing that caught my attention. Dj got down from the car and I got pissed.” Yoongi took a pause. He wasnt exactly sure how to tell the others that he had uninvited you from his party, But Hobi caught onto it quickly.

“Hold on, Why did you get pissed at her?”

“I had specifically told her not to come to the party.” Jin raised his eyebrows at Yoongi’s confession. They were all there when they left the invitation at your house, Then when Yoongi invited you.

“And why was that?” Yoongi sighed at Jin's question, This was bound to come. The rest of the others kept looking at Yoongi impatiently, Too many questions in their mind but answers to none.

“I was doubtful of her okay? I don't know, I thought she had ulterior motives in getting involved with us. I thought she manipulated Lily into joining us.”

“And I am no child to being manipulated like this.” They looked up and saw Lily standing there, arms crossed in front of her chest, She glared Yoongi down and he looked down again. He had been wrong. So wrong.

It was clear now that if you had any motives, Why would you save his life?

“Continue.” Namjoon spoke quickly, afraid of starting an argument between Lily and Yoongi. Lily had already left the house once to get you in. There was no telling what she would do next.

“I saw her and went running towards her. She was doing something under the car, I thought she was muddling the cars and I lost it. I yelled and she looked up, And suddenly out of nowhere she pulled out her gun and aimed at me.” Jungkook gasped at Yoongi’s words while the others widened their eyes, this story was certainly getting more interesting, and shocking.

No one would know what you were actually doing under the cars, But they had a lot of time to figure it out.

“She suddenly shot and out of impulse i shot her too, i realised she didn't aim for me and there was a man standing right behind me, It took me ten seconds to realise i was directly in line of fire and Dj saved my life. But–”

“It was too late.” Hobi finished the sentence for him and a tear slipped out of Yoongi’s eye, reminiscing the scene again.

Namjoon placed his hand over Yoongi’s shoulder, reassuring his hyung. They could figure this out. Lily came and sat down beside Yoongi taking his hands into hers.

“It's going to be okay baby, Don't worry it will be fine.”

“I did it out of impulse, I swear I didn't mean to hurt her.” Lily stroked her fingers on his hand, And Yoongi broke down in his woman’s arms.

“Where is Jeh?”

“Shit i forgot about him. Something doesn't feel right. Jeh never leaves her alone.” Jimin wondered.

“Taehyung ask Chaeyong to speak to his cousin, Chongin. Send our men to her warehouse.” Namjoon yelled out orders and the younger one immediately got to work.

Everyone waited with bated breaths for the surgery to get over. Nothing could happen to You. You were at no fault, You saved their brother's life, And most importantly what would they explain to the circle for taking out a member?

Lily was terrified the most, A major part of her plan would go down the drain if something happened to you. One moment she was at the party and the next moment there were gunshots and chaos.

For the first time in her life, Lily prayed with all her faith to save you. She can't be losing now. Not after getting so close, She was very few steps away from her plan. She had already probed the guys by leaving the house that they had literally rushed over to your house to convince you to come stay with them, And she knew very well you being you would obviously oblige at their every request.

The things that she was doing for love and the things that you did for love.

Taehyung came rushing in after a few minutes, Panic very clear on his face.

“Jeh’s injured too, He's not in a good shape. Someone killed their few men too. Our men are bringing him here.” Everybody fell silent at this information. What exactly was going on? You were here trying to search something under their cars, Jeh was beaten up badly. What had you both gotten yourselves into?

Finally after what seemed after ten years, the doctor reappeared and everyone rushed towards him in hope.

“She's out of danger, But her body is still in little shock. It may take a while for her to gain consciousness, And we will keep her under observation until then.

“Oh Thankgod.” Yoongi breathed a sigh of relief and the others did the same thing. They released a breath they had caught up for a long time.

But their relief was short lived because right at that moment, Jeh was wheeled in and the other froze when they saw what condition he was in. He was beaten up badly, There were blood clots on his face, bruises scattered all over his body, His clothes torn and bloodied. Shit they were worried for him now.

The doctors wheeled Jeh immediately into the room, an army of nurses rushing behind them. Everyone took their seats again, This time waiting for Jeh.

Another hour passed and it still seemed like an eternity, There were no people who they could call. They knew a little about your relatives staying abroad, But they didn't know you so well to have their contact information.

“Yoongi Hyung, you should change.” Jimin tried to convince his hyung to freshen up, He was pretty much shaken up, and his clothes looked like they were dipped in blood. Yoongi shook his head and Jimin frowned. He knew Yoongi was stubborn sometimes and there was only one person who could get him to agree and that was his only hyung, Jin.

“Yoongiah go freshen up, If you're gonna stay here then at least stay in a state that's decent enough. You don't want her to wake up and see you like this and go back to unconsciousness do you?”

Yoongi got up reluctantly, Jungkook and Taehyung offered to drive him and get some food and comfortable clothes for others as well. It looked like they could be staying here for a few days.

“I hope Jehs fine, he has to be.” Namjoon patted Lily’s hand who just rested her head on his shoulder.

“Jeh has sustained a lot of internal injuries, I'm sorry but he's in Coma.” There was a pin drop silence in the corridor, Jeh was in coma ? This was devastating. They were now worried about your reaction. Everyone in the circle knew your and Jehs strong bond. You were two peas in a pod, If anybody didn't know better, They would literally think you were related by blood.

“We stay here until both recover, we are going to do whatever it takes. Either we take turns or we all stay here. Choose.” Everyone nodded at Lily’s instruction, Both of you werent out of danger yet. Someone was out there to kill you both, So they couldn't take chances. You saved Yoongi’s life, This was the least they could do.

“Everyone keep your guns handy, The hospital won't say anything. Shoot at sight if anybody tries entering these two rooms. And lily you, Keep a gun with you. It's enough to scare them away by just flashing the gun.” Namjoon handed his gun to Lily, While Hobi went down to fetch everybody else’s from the car.

_____________________________________________________________

You were wheeled into the VIP room, and Jeh in another. Lily, Hobi and Yoongi and Taehyung stayed with you and Namjoon, Jin, Jimin and Jungkook stayed in Jeh’s room. Well armed and alert.

Yoongi stayed close to your bed, Checking up on you in regular intervals. He looked at your sleeping face, Sleeping like you weren't shot just a few hours ago. Your face looked at peace if you were just taking a nap.

For the first time Yoongi looked at your features, You were beautiful, those eyelashes and that sharp nose and the soft glow that illuminates your features. Something stirred in him. He couldn't forget that moment when you were standing tall in front of him with a gun, ready to shoot. You saved his life without any thought. The fact that you didn't budge when you saw him holding a gun, and the fact that you still went ahead and pulled the trigger knowing that he would shoot you next. This fascinated Yoongi.

It looked a lot to intrigue Min Yoongi, And you had intrigued this man the most that anyone ever did. Yoongi felt ashamed of doubting you. See, now the thing was Yoongi wasnt ready to accept the fact that Lily was the one who wanted to bring another woman into their relationship, after three years of happily dating each other. How was it possible that suddenly she would want to bring someone else? There had to be something else, But sadly that something else existed only in Yoongi’s mind.

Lily didn't sleep a wink the entire night, Her mind wandering off to the possibilities of so many things. What would happen if Jeh wakes up and knows Yoongi shot you? Will he let you stay with the boys? And what happens if you don't want to stay with them anymore?

Everything that she worked for so far would go down the drain, It had taken so much convincing the guys to get you in the relationship, then to get you to move in with them. There was no other way they were going to fall in love with you, If they didn't spend their every waking minute with you.

“Why are you awake?” Taehyung's voice startled Lily and she immediately straightened up and took the coffee from Tae’s hand that he had brought for all of them.

“Uh nothing. Just thinking about how drastic life changes, Yesterday both of them were doing just fine and today they are in the hospital.”

“Yeah life changes drastically you know, Take us for an instance. Yesterday we were happily dating our girlfriend and today she wants to bring in someone else.” Lily frowned at Taehyung's taunt. This man hasn't stopped taunting her once since you were involved.

“Let that go Tae, You've all accepted her already.”

“Oh no we didn't Lily, We said yes because you said so. You're all we’ve loved all these years and god knows what kind of assholes weve been to this woman because we wanted to project our anger somewhere.”

“Too late, She's a part of us and She is going to stay with us.” Taehyung clenched his fists at Lily’s comment, who just stood her ground stubbornly.

“I'd like to see your face if your boyfriends really end up falling in love with her. To tell you, I think we have a start.” He pointed at Yoongi and Lily smirked. So what if they fall in love with you, That's exactly what she wanted.

“Quit it you two.” Yoongi snapped.

Taehyung and Lily quietly sat down on the couch, Hobi glared at the two of them. What had gotten into them?

“What's wrong with the both of you?”

“Tell him.”

“Lily, I said quit it.” Yoongi's voice raised to another three notches and Lily squeaked and immediately shut her mouth. Taehyung smirked looking at Lily, And she glared at Taehyung. Hobi raised his eyebrows in question looking at both of them to which Lily just threw him another glare. Hobi ignored the two of them and quietly went back to scrolling on his phone.

In the other room Namjoon wasnt any better, Everything had gone to shit. Literally everything. They had agreed to give this relationship with you a chance only for Lily, Only because Lily said so. Namjoon felt devastatingly guilty now that he knew you saved Yoongi’s life. He was the one who had given the boys free reign to do whatever they like when it came to you, And in turn he had done the same what others had done, Ignore you, project onto you for no reason when maybe you weren't even responsible.

Namjoon had yet to decide if he really wanted to be in this relationship, Not just for the sake of it, Or not because Lily wanted it. He had enough now, He had enough of beating around the bush. He would think about it. Playing with someone's emotions wasnt funny, He had done it once. He wasnt about to do it again.

When you would recover, He would sit you down properly and decide. One last time, one last conversation, If Lily had a problem then it was her problem.

_____________________________________________________________

The room to your room flew open and Yoongi immediately stood up pointing his gun at the intruder. The said man pulled out a gun himself and pointed at Yoongi, Who gestured at the other three waiting to shoot.

“I am her friend you fucking asshole, Put the gun down.” Yoongi scoffed at the man's sentence moving a little closer, The said man standing unmoved.

“Im Marco, Jeh’s Boyfriend and her very good friend.” Yoogi backed down a little but kept his guard, Marco quickly bought out his phone and showed him a picture with Jeh and You and the rest of them put their guns down.

“All of you, Out of here.” Everyone looked at Marco like he had lost it. He moved to your bedside and gently patted on your head. He looked at yoongi with eyes that screamed murder.

“Don't think I don't know what you did.” He thundered and Yoongi moved towards the man with his fists tightly clenched and Hobi and Taehyung immediately jumped in between them.

“Okay guys quit it, This is a bloody hospital.”

“You guys can wait in Jeh’s room if you want. Not here. Only she can stay here.” He pointed at Lily and Hobi pulled the guys out of the room to avoid any drama.

Marco was hell bent on not letting any of the guys near you, Why? It was known only to him. The fact that Yoongi had shot you without any thought, and the moment Chongbin had called him to inform him about Jeh and You, MArco had taken the first flight to Seoul from Malaga.

_____________________________________________________________

Days kept passing and there was no sign of any improvement in you or Jeh. Marco and the guys kept staying at the hospital only taking turns to go home and get their clothes. Marco never spoke a word to any of them.

Whenever he spoke it was always like someone had to jump in between. The boys were tired of not getting any answers. But I still kept going. Yoongi was the grumpiest among them. He was always near you until Marco came, And now Marco was holding him responsible like he did it out of some vendetta.

Six days later the boys were more than thankful that you woke up. Literally.

But what shocked them more was the moment you woke up, You had gone frantic searching for Jeh. And what surprised them even more was that you had set up a deal with the godfather himself. Yoongi was startled to say the least, You went to these lengths for him?

You tried to keep his Ivanovs fillers away, Yoongi knew what he was getting into when he had tried to strike a deal with Ivanov. The drug that he was coming up looked promising and Yoongi was still finding out a way to eliminate his fillers and he was surprised when Ivanov had clearly mentioned that fillers would be kept out of here.

Everybody knew Ivanov and his fillers, it was his second name. But nobody wanted to mess with him. So it came as a genuine surprise when Ivanov himself kept them out of it.

Everybody was shocked at the length you had gone, For them?

Talking to the godfather himself was a privilege and you had gone and done that, For them?

They had literally felt like shit when they recollected what happened between them and you a few days ago, How they had ignored you and been rude towards you.

What shocked them even more was the way you had marched off to the lion's den itself to drag Ivanov. The courage that you had was something they were admiring to no end.

You were more like a puzzle to the boys now, Not a single word of what Marco had said left their mind, It didn't leave even when you went to Moscow, Not when they saw you dragging Ivanov to the hospital and killing him off with your friend's hand.

The boys were in awe of your loyalty, A question plagued their mind- If you could go these lengths for your friend, What lengths would you go for the people you loved. And you going and striking a deal with the godfather himself told a lot about you as a person. You were a person who went to any lengths to protect their loved ones.

For now, They didn't know much of how things were going to turn out, But they knew for sure they were taking you home. Until you healed. They knew you stayed alone. They would bring you home with them. Once you healed, You could choose if you wanted to keep staying there or if you wanted to go back.

They owed you at least this much.

_____________________________________________________________

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