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#which is super unhelpful i know
sparkymalone · 4 months
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HI SPARKY so I’m here cause like. I kinda wanna draw a smut part from one of the kuzuhina thingys you wrote but idk what scene to pick!!!!! do you or anyone else who sees this have any ideas in mind ?? lol cause I don’t know myself🦐🦐 (I don’t know why I’m using the shrimp emoji)
I mean. I CANT DRAW NUDITY FOR THE LIFE OF ME because I can’t draw those specific body parts well. but I can try? maybe I’ll cover it up or just be lazy with it I don’t know yet lol!! I just wanna draw a sexual scene and I want someone to pick for me because idkkkk. it’ll be more of a doodle than a detailed thing but yea
also the amount of asks hyping up the panty chapter, lmfafaooo 😭😭
HI KOUZAY 💖💖💖
OMG yes please! Man, I don't know what to pick either, lol. The OG Despair Disease chapter would always be good, or you could do one of the yakuzaverse chapters because they're mostly clothed in those lmaooo
I dunno, my personal favorite chapters are the omegaverse (kill me lmao), the not-Kuzupeko one, the one with only one bed, and the sibling rivalry chapter. Do what you will with that info. 😂
I love your art so I'm super excited to see whatever you come up with!
And OMG this panty thing is getting out of control, but in the best possible way.
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tj-crochets · 1 month
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Hey y’all! Weird question, when people talk about joint pain, is that like pain of the muscles around the joint, or pain in the joint itself? And how do you tell the difference?
Asking because multiple doctors keep asking about/assuming I have joint pain, and while I do have some stiffness and pain in joints sometimes I assumed it was the muscles around the joints, because my electrolytes are Very Wrong and it causes muscle issues
Oh wait extra question: when you get cold do the bones in your hands and feet ache and feel like they take forever to warm up? Because I thought that was just bad circulation (from my inability to electrolyte correctly) but now I’m not sure
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reenaria · 10 months
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currently having a queer identity crisis on this accursed holiday
#but actually. i’ve realized that like. 95% or more of my attraction to men has been comphet#i thought it wasn’t because i’ve been more or less identifying as bi since i was 11#so like. i figured if i didn’t like men at all i would’ve figured it out sooner?#it wasn’t until a couple years ago that i resolved to stop dating straight & masculine guys because i feel like i’m performing for them#and my current partner of 2.5 years is amab and socially perceived as a man but he’s bi and sees himself as ‘void of gender’#which is also the way i see him but not the way most people see him#he does get mistaken for a woman a fair ammount though. which brings us both a lot of joy lol#but anyway. my crisis is that i’ve been feeling more and more detached from the bi label because i feel like it implies attraction to men#and i’ve known for a little while now that i’m almost exclusively attracted to femininity and androgyny#and primarily attracted to women in general#like if i weren’t with my partner i would 100% be out there dating women and maybe? identifying as a lesbian#but i feel like i have no claim to that label especially with my current partner who is not a woman and is much more androgynous than fem#idk. do i keep calling myself bi? it feels like i’ve slipped away from it#i’ve been using queer a lot more lately because umbrella terms are the only thing that seem to make sense to me anymore#i know labels can be super complicated and unhelpful in some cases but i also want to know where my place is in the community ya know?#i feel so confused without a solid label and it’s causing me a lot more stress than it should#(also my partner is such a blessing and said he’d be supportive if i ever felt i needed to leave him to be with women)#(like he said ‘i’d be sad for a while but i’d still be your best friend) and i was just 🥺#this may be even longer than my last tag novel lmao i just hate the idea of putting this stuff in the body of the post#anyway if any pals/mutuals read all that and have any insight or advice i’d be curious to hear#reena.txt
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nerdie-faerie · 1 year
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The one specification I gave about my laptop was that I needed it for university so of course it doesn't fit in my uni bag 😅
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hijinxinprogress · 2 months
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Everyone in YJ is multilingual (mostly bc they’re nosy)
Everyone on YJ speaks at least 14 languages which is a skill they all use to fuck with the jl and their villains like oh??? We’re having secret conversations??? I would like to be included and everyone’s like wtf why do you speak this fucking random dialect of Russian?? This is Arizona??
They all speak binary for some fucking reason (they’re nerds) Also Kon tells people binary is Tim’s native language which starts a debate on whether it counts as Kons native language)
Diana is swearing in ancient greek under her breathe and Anita laughs before responding in ancient greek so Diana’s time monitoring yj is spent trying to make sure the public knows she did not teach those little miscreants to swear in her native language however she did teach them some technically lethal combat moves which is not better but she thinks it is
Anytime aliens come to metropolis or anywhere else on earth, occasionally Kon shows up and starts speaking to them in their native language so Clark’s like 🤨 …did Cadmus teach you that?? I don’t even know that language and kons so offended bc no?? Bart crashed our fucking spaceship and we were stranded in space for like 8 months…you didn’t notice??? I know their language bc we fucking hitchhiked back to earth (yj also pissed off multiple entire planets of people but 🤷🏾‍♀️) and Batman’s so pissed when Clark complains to him about this bc Tim told him they were doing undercover recon in Eritrea
the jl is trying to translate a threat from the league of assassins while batman is off planet but cissie showed up bc damian was insulting the jl in the leagues dialect and being purposefully unhelpful (he sabotaged the leagues plan like three hours ago and he enjoys making adults feel stupid esp if they’ve tried to baby him) so everyone else is confused when cissie laughs at damians remarks and casually corrects green arrows translation (she also invites damian to blow stuff up with yj which is immediately rejected but he changes his mind when olivers lets them know he can hear them and tries to lecture them)
clark is talking to Diana in kryptonian and he hears a collective gasp of offense from yj and he’s like ?? (Tim followed all the supers around for like a month to teach himself kryptonian and then taught Kon and the rest of yj)
J’onn walked in on Greta and Cassie discussing how to ditch their green lantern in the watchtower break room and snitched immediately bc they finished his secret stash of cookies but he also has inside jokes in martian with them (despite this yj does not listen to him in any capacity)
They all know Interlac (Bart kept cussing in interlac and decided it would be great if yj also did this) but really the rest of the jl is under the impression it’s some fucking code yj made except the speedsters are like Bart ☹️ no spoilers you promised!! and he’s like it’s not even a real language 🤨 didn’t you hear?? Rob made this fucked up cipher and I hate it 😞 it took me like six minutes to learn (they have to let it go when Bart goes oh so you don’t think tims smart enough to create a language on his own?? within earshot of the bats)
Or Anita starts muttering in patois while they’re being lectured by the jl and bart laughs and she’s like 🤨 someone cooked here and I don’t know if I like that 
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morlock-holmes · 6 months
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Got hit by the Adderall shortage lads.
I raised my voice to the pharmacy technician and her boss said, "You have been yelling at her for five minutes now."
I wasn't yelling, and that just made me way angrier. Oh, is it frustrating to have to spend five minutes dealing with an unhelpful person? Is five minutes a lot of precious time that you won't get back? Wow, I'm so sorry, I'll get out of your hair and go spend half an hour calling other pharmacies individually to see if they have any supply, and when it turns out they don't I'll just wait a few days and see if the shipment you're about to get has Adderall in it. And if it doesn't I'll spend another hour or so calling around to figure out what I'm supposed to do.
Gosh, it sure must be frustrating for you to spend five minutes on this, I can't imagine.
You know what pisses me off? I get that it's not your fault that the FDA and DEA have their heads buried up their own asses.
You know what is your company's fault? The fact that you have 12 locations plausibly within driving distance of me and the procedure to see whether an alternate location can fill the prescription is for me to look up each one individually, call them, wait on hold, and then ask each individual pharmacist. There's no way to track the supply, or to find out if it's committed to other patients, and that's nothing to do with the shortage.
After talking to several pharmacists the answer I got several times was, "Yeah they can't tell us what's going to get delivered ahead of time, a lot of times they say they have stock and then when we get the shipment it just randomly doesn't have some of what we ordered."
Like, I'm not just pissed off at the shortage, I'm pissed at this really bizarre inability to track whether anybody has it or doesn't have it. Isn't this a super dangerous drug that the FDA and DEA have to monitor closely? But the warehouse you order from just... doesn't track how much they have or where it goes?
I can't emphasize this enough, I've been told by multiple pharmacies that not only do they not know when they are getting more Adderall, they don't know when they'll know if they are getting more Adderall. They can't give you a no, they can only say, "We're getting a shipment of drugs on Thursday and it might have Adderall in it or it might not, we don't know until then."
And since it's a controlled substance, your doctor has to specify which pharmacy you are getting the drug from, if you find another pharmacy that has it you have to first call your doctor and then have them send a new prescription to that particular pharmacy.
There was a lot of this during COVID also, getting tests and things. Not just a shortage of supplies, a completely decrepit infrastructure which left each individual out in the cold without information about where supplies might be or how you would find them.
Like, why is the procedure for patients, "Just call every pharmacy in the city to see if they have some"? That's not caused by supply shortages.
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writers-potion · 13 days
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when writing enemies to lovers, how to I avoid the trope of “hes mean to me but it’s okay because he likes me” and make the mmc redeemable after being mean, because so far all I have is have her be just as bad 😭 (I don’t know if I worded that right)
Redeeming The Bad Boy Character
Drop Subtle Hints of Redeemability
Okay. Rule Number 1 for romance heroes: They need to be LOVABLE. Full stop. 
Before you start coming up with possible justifications, place the actions of your bad boy on the emotional balancing scale of your girl. Do his real feelings shine through the meanness on the surface?
What readers usually DON’T want to see redeemed is:
Outright lying/manipulating the girl 
Being obsessive and controlling 
Physical/emotional bullying (i.e. stuff that real bullies would do)
“Crossing the line”: This will depend on character - like insulting a disabled sister the girl character feels super protective towards (like NO PLEASE NO)
Even if the “enemy” phase of your romance is meant to be intense, your bad boy needs to display “goodness of heart”. This is easy if you’re switching POVs or 3rd person omniscient where you can show him secretly beating himself in regret, trying to make up with her behind her back although she doesn’t know, etc. 
Even if you’re doing the girl’s 1st person POV, drop subtle hints that the guy character isn’t as mean as the girl is made to believe:
Him having the reputation with friends/teachers/neighbors for being kind 
Him being awarded in school for good deeds
The girl’s friend telling her stories about how the guy actually seems nice. If this is a YA setting, you can even get away with explicit comments like, “maybe you’re judging him too hard”, etc. 
A good example is Bryce  in <Flipped>:
Bryce is an innately shy middle schooler who finds himself inadvertently influenced by his toxic dad, who looks down on the girl (Juli) and her family. 
By flipping over to Bryce’s POV, his reluctance for the “mean” things he’s done is revealed (he’s kinda scared of his dad + he’s never been taught better)
Eventually, Bryce grows up and learns to treat Juli better. 
If you’re going to use family history/backstory as justification, remember:
The backstory doesn’t justify anything by just existing. That’s called an excuse. 
The bad boy needs to have a point of realization and grow up, moving away from his dark past into the light, towards the love interest. 
Misunderstanding
Another way to redeem a bad boy character is to shift some blame on the female character too. In fact, every story has two sides - the girl has her own goals and biases. 
For example:
Academic or workplace rivals: since the girl has to compete with him, she will tend to take offhand comments offensively, etc. 
A third person badmouthing the buy deliberately to the girl
The girl overhearing the guy saying something bad about her (which wasn’t in fact the case) and being determined to not like anything he does after
Make Him Suffer 
If you want to give your girl some backbone, just make her fight back! “Fighting back” can be in different forms:
Ignoring the guy outright
Just giving her another potential love interest who treats her better 
She literally correcting him with awesome logic and maturity that make him shut up
She crying (either out of madness or sadness), then proceeding to avoid him actively
Write about how your bad boy will eventually realize his mistakes and come around after he takes a real blow. Think about why your bad boy is being mean in the first place: it’s to get her attention. Tit-for-tat can work for female characters who have some teeth, but doing the same things he does would mean that she IS giving him attention, which ironically fulfills his initial motives. 
Personally, I think the best way to “fight back” is to no longer give him the attention, hinting that the girl wishes to move on from this unhelpful relationship status. This will set off warning signs in the MMC’s head that if he doesn’t change his ways, she would be gone for good. 
The point is, if your girl cannot tolerate something, you can’t make her sit around. If your boy is mean and immature, she needs to be the one to take the mature step - and walk away.
Apologizing in the Other Character’s Style
What the MMC will need to do to gain the girl’s attention back will depend on what she thinks, but this will often involve:
Explaining his true motivations/resolving the misunderstanding
A genuine apology 
Spending some time apart during which he can reflect and make up to her 
Undoing the damage, if this is possible
If she’s been just as bad as him on occasions, make her reciprocate the apology! Re-establish healthy boundaries that didn’t exist before, and show how they stick to it. 
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ghostaholics · 1 year
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Ok but like the enemies with benefits and hate love trope REALLY suits ghost like cmon it’s like him ya know and the part where he would actually WILL push them out of the bed is 100% true 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭and that one hc where it says that he would rather die than make the first move is so valid .
𝒆𝒏𝒆𝒎𝒊𝒆𝒔-𝒘𝒊𝒕𝒉-𝒃𝒆𝒏𝒆𝒇𝒊𝒕𝒔 (18+) || 𝒋𝒆𝒂𝒍𝒐𝒖𝒔 𝒔𝒊𝒎𝒐𝒏
literally they’re in his room and after they’re done he’s like, helping her find her clothes not to be nice but because he’s trying to get her out the door as fast as possible; no cuddling, no aftercare just a ‘thanks for the shag, now fuck off’ because he wants to take a nap – simon rolls over onto his stomach, hands tucked underneath his pillow as though he’s already sleeping because she can just see herself out
but now she’s whisper-yelling at him that she can’t find her panties even after searching high and low for them, is basically shaking him awake and doesn’t give a shite about his goddamn beauty rest
and he cracks an eye at her, being super unhelpful like – ‘i don’t see the problem? just go without them then, you’re taking too damn bloody long’ so she leaves with a scowl and has to make this hellish walk back to her own quarters with his cum starting to drip down her leg (even gets stopped on her way by price who mentions something about a 0800 debrief the next morning, which is an awful 10-minute-long conversation) meanwhile, simon's in his room chuckling because he hid them under his pillow (being the bastard he is) and he's already thinking that she’s going to need another attitude adjustment sooner than later
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drferox · 8 months
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My MS Diagnosis
So I’m approaching the 2 year mark since my Multiple Sclerosis diagnosis and I thought I’d better document how I got here, because being the patient is a weird experience, especially for a condition that had kind of vague symptoms that needed a fair amount of work up.
My symptoms actually started in early 2020, when I was in the third trimester of pregnancy. The main symptom was mistaken for carpal tunnel syndrome - numbness in my fingers that would progress to increasingly violent pins & needles sensations, that would progress to burning if I tried to push through it. Only this sensation would extend all the way up to my shoulders at times. I stopped performing surgery, because not only was I unsatisfied with my lack of sensation to know what I was doing with my tissue handling, but the pain would get worse quickly in constrictive surgical gloves in the presence of patient warming. So I stopped performing surgery in late pregnancy and was told it would get better a few months after giving birth.
It did not.
So six months after giving birth, finding myself able to use my hands for short periods but still unable to perform surgery to my standard, I went back to complain to the doctor. I also couldn’t play video games properly, my arms would often be numb when I woke up, all the way up to my shoulder, and they were super temperature sensitive. Even hot water from washing dishes would set them off.
They sent me down a carpal tunnel work up - ultrasounds and talking to a neurologist. The short version is they did tell me I had mild carpal tunnel… on one side only.
Which did not make any damn sense considering I had symptoms on both sides all the way up to my shoulder.
The worst neurologist in the world could not explain to me why a mild problem on one wrist was affecting sensation all the way up to the opposite shoulder, and just said ‘it happens sometimes’. Now, I like to think I have a solid understanding of the basics of how a body works, and was really unsatisfied with this answer. They recommended I talk to a surgeon, since I’d already been doing a bunch of physiotherapy, but I decided not to. Surgery could have put my hand in a cast for up to 6 weeks, I had a 6 month old baby to care for at home and a partner who was useless at best, and abusive at worst. I could not afford the time in a cast.
So I went to try something else, visiting an osteopath to see what they could do about my ‘mild’ carpal tunnel, and while I’m there, these headaches I’ve been getting.
She spent a good long while stretching out different muscle groups, and found that certain neck muscle stretches changed the sensations I was getting in my fingertips. So whatever was causing the hand problem was coming from somewhere in the neck, and she recommended I get a CT scan.
Went back to my doctor to get a referral for a CT scan, and explained what was going on. He thought about it for a minute, didn’t voice his concerns, and upgraded it to a neck MRI.
That MRI found a demyelinating lesion in my neck. So went back for a full Central Nervous System scan and found a couple more borderline ones.
That sent me back to a (different) neurologist, had a proper neurological exam that found a few random patches of altered skin sensation in addition to the arm weirdness I had going on. So I was probably a MS case, but not particularly severe as MS goes.
To confirm it I needed a lumbar puncture to look for oligoclonal bands in by CSF. The lumbar puncture was a moderately unpleasant experience which then mandated that I remain lying down for 24 hours so that my spinal fluid didn’t spring a leak. With a baby and a distinctly unhelpful partner, I barely made it to that 24 hours.
And then… I sprung a CSF leak. Which is a jolly weird experience I can tell you.
When your CSF leaks from a lumbar puncture you will feel perfectly fine… when you are lying flat on your back, because your spine flops over the hole and plugs the leak. If you’re upright at all the spine flops away from the hole and it slowly leaks out, and you get more of this weird frontal headache that gets worse the longer you’re upright, standing there talking to the ER admissions nurse. And the info I had explained that it can progress to seizures and similar the worse it gets, but I only got as far as pain and fuzzy vision. I seriously could only be upright for ten minutes without pain, and had to lie down to resolve it.
That required some medicine-that-looks-like-magic to fix, called a blood patch. Doctors took some of my blood, fresh out of the vein, and inserted it into my spine approximately where the leak should be, so that the clot would cover the leaky patch. Self blood magic. It worked brilliantly, about an hour later.
The CSF tap ordeal confirmed the presence of the oligoclonal bands, and then I got stunted into the public health system, in a department specifically geared towards managing Multiple Sclerosis patients. They debated for a little while, at a multidisciplinary meeting, whether I was really MS or a Clinically Isolated Syndrome (which is like Multiple Sclerosis but without the ‘Multiple’ part), but settled on MS. Yes, Tumblr, I was nearly diagnosed with CIS.
The shoe thing took about a year from when I actively complained to doctors, or about 18 months from the first probable symptoms. That’s approximate because some things that were thought to be pregnancy symptoms could have been due to MS, like fatigue and leg weakness. I’m pretty lucky that I’m comfortable in hospitals and with medical procedures, am reasonably medically literate. I think the magic phrase that got things to happen quickly was ‘these symptoms are greatly affecting my ability to do my job’.
I don’t think my MS has progressed since starting the medication (and I’ll talk about the medication in another post). I’ve acquired one additional brain lesion since diagnosis, but I have no clue what physical symptom it’s associated with.
While some symptoms are better, I still cannot perform surgery to the standard or with the endurance that I used to,so I basically don’t any more. I can do about ten minutes, which is enough to bail a new graduate vet out of trouble, but not enough to take over completely for them. I’ve had a few years to think about it but I don’t know what the MS is going to do to my career, only that I can still practice for now.
It’s not great, but it could be a whole lot worse, and that’s how I got here.
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bonefall · 30 days
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i'm ngl depicting thunder's prosthetic as a burden is pretty uncomfortable even if it is something some amputees experience because like. there's a huge stigma around prosthetics already you know? it's like having a parent forcibly strap a child into a wheelchair when they don't need it and having a horrible experience with it and that being your only character in a wheelchair. some full-time wheelchair users do resent their wheelchairs but when that's the only time you're bringing it up at all it feels like you're playing into our society's perception of wheelchairs and mobility aids in general as useless and best and divine punishment at worst. idk do let me know if i'm wording this wrong because i really do love better bones! it's just that this detail is... strange.
I mean, I'm open to feedback if that's not something I should do-- but I do actually have other characters in prosthetics and mobility aids! A lot of them! Thunderstar's actually the only one who ends up rejecting his own, because I also wanted to depict that it's bad to force a device onto someone who does not want one.
Especially in circumstances like Thunder Storm's, where that sort of device would be actively unhelpful for his lifestyle. It might help in open field environments like moorland, but then I got more feedback and realized that it would just make a lot of unwanted noise in a forest (since cats have carpal whiskers to help them figure out where to place their paws). Then I figured it was a good way to show how BB!Clear Sky doesn't actually listen to his son's needs and acts differently when he's not "grateful" enough for his gift.
But he's far and away from the only one with a mobility aid or prosthetic!
I haven't figured out Frog entirely yet, but he's going to be the first cat with a "wheelchair" type device, to set up a long line of cats through the generations improving on it (Probably not much more than a reinforced canvas or durable leather, as this was the age of very early flax processing)
Wildfur's the next in the big advancements, even making the Great Journey in his own and getting a side story based around Littlecloud and Cinderpelt collaborating over this
The device is then improved upon by Jessy for Briarlight, giving her a level of independence and confidence that she needs to finally cut her mom out until she learns how to behave
Deadfoot has a brace for his front paw because the joint is loose (it was based on a friend's carpel tunnel bracelet) which is affectionately referred to as The Bonker; his name is also now an Honor Title (Old name: Hoprunner) for inventing a battle move by distracting with his good paw, and then SLAMMING his other limb down hard on his opponent. It's called "deadfooting."
I think mobility devices are super important, usually massively improve quality of life, and I just enjoy designing them, so the choice to portray Thunder Storm's as negative was a very deliberate one that I did in response to what I thought was a desire in representation. Even the fact it's a hind-leg prosthetic was thought out, since those have a much higher satisfaction rate in humans than hand prosthetics, but in a cat would probably be the opposite.
Still, I'm not missing a limb, so now with all of that context presented, do you still think the same thing? Should I just add even more limb prosthetics to make the ratio of satisfied prosthetic users vs Thunder Storm even steeper?
Sunlit Frost is actually going to have a bite on his good paw go septic (the other side has permanent damage from the fire). I could have that paw get amputated and have Thunderstar "return the favor" for how Sunlit Frost created the prosthetic he rejected by helping him build his own. A pawsthetic, if you will
OR would it be better to just remove the subplot of Thunder Storm grappling with/rejecting a prosthetic that is unfitting for him entirely, and have all prosthetics be 100% treated as positive in the narrative?
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autismprotocol · 9 days
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TMAG Theory Board Update (EP 11-12)
Hi guys sorry about the late posting I've just started a new quarter of college and its been pretty hectic. also got into my school design BFA program so pretty stoked about that! Anyways lets get into the Episode Breakdowns because even though not a lot of lore related things happened I still have a lot to talk about
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For the breakdown I'll separate each by episode in sequential order
What Happened in Episode 11: Marked
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Celias Rude Awakening- we jump right into the weirdness straight away with Celia waking up on the side of the interstate. she indicates that this is not a weird occurrence and ends the scene by telling someone named Jack that she's "on her way." If you remember episode 8 after Celia and Sam talk to Gerry and Gertrude, she mentions stuff about wanting help with her own mystery. When Sam asks about it she says she's looking into Time travel, other dimentions and teleportation. Many people have theorized that maybe Celia is just a super heavy sleepwalker, but I think the she teleports random places out of nowhere. This could be a side effect of her reality hopping if this Celia is originally from The archives universe.
As for the identity of Jack I'm not quite sure about that yet. I cross referenced the name Jack with past episodes of TMA. The only thing that came up was Jack Barnabas from the statement about dating Agnes Montague (aka an avatar of the desolation and Jesus-like figure for the cult of the lightless flame) So Unless Celia is secretly Agnes of Agnes reincarnated , I can't find any way to link Barnabas to Celia. (if anyone has a theory feel free to send it my way.)
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Sam Lore- this one is pretty minor story-wise but I thought it was interesting. Before the statement for the episode is presented we get some classic Sam and Alice Banter ™ most of it is pretty lighthearted but I noticed Sam mention something that could indicate he might be an amputee.
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These could not mean anything and I find it weird that it hasn't been mentioned until now but thought it was kind of cool and I will probably be drawing sam with a prothetic leg in the future cause I really like this head-canon. It also begs to question if he is missing a leg. it might have anything to do with his past as a Magnus institute test subject but then again could just be a fun character detail added by Jonny and/or Alex .
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The Statement- Getting into the statement we get another Ink5oul appearance. Also possible Ink5oul identifying as she/they. (and lets be honest being a fear avatar is pretty non binary core). I found this Episode gave me a feeling of a hybrid between the Vast, Buried and the Flesh some people are theorizing that is might be a new entity called the Deep but I think that the fear of the ocean could easily apply to the vast or buried. Not much to say about this story though pretty standard Magnus horror that also gave us a hint to what Ink5oul's goal could be/which entity they serve.
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Post Bonzo- Gwen has a debrief with Lena after her first Externals Liason assignment and her meeting with Mr. Bonzo. Undoubtedly Gwen is still pretty shaken from her encounter, even arriving late to work due to sleeplessness. Gwen is able to ask Lena a few questions mainly she wanted to know who's name was written on the letter given to Bonzo
Lena is largely unhelpful but tells Gwen she should have worked it out by now and if not to pay close attention to the case load for the next couple of days. before the latest episode my guess was Klaus because that is the only person mentioned so far that the OIAR intends to kill. but more on that later
Marked- Now were getting to my favorite thing about this episode. This episode title can have two meanings. The first is the more literal interpretation. Tattoos are marking of the body and the case this episode was all about tattoos so easily a good name would be marked. But I believe this is a red herring meant to misguide listeners who have not consumed all 200 episodes of TMA because if you know the world of Magnus Archives the term Marked takes on a entirely different meaning.
In TMA the term marked is used to indicate that somebody has been influenced by one or more or the fears and are one their way to becoming an Avatar. I think this could be a coded way to tell the audience someone in the OIAR has been marked. I have two potential candidates
Alice Dyer- Alice has been having dreams about the Institute after her and Sam's adventure into the ruins. also she mentions feeling like someone's watching her (common to people influenced or fed upon by the Ceaseless Watcher/The Eye) My guess if she is marked it would be by the Eye.
Gwendolyn Bouchard: Probably the most likely culprit. The main way an entitly tends to mark people is through encounters with other avatars. Gwen has just had an encounter with Mr Bonzo last episode who I strongly believe must be an avatar of some sort.
What Happened in Episode 12: Getting Off
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Aww Sam!!- Sam asked Celia out and it was adorably awkward. not much to say I just loved this interaction and I'm longing for a new Magnus brand office romance hopefully is wont be an agonizing slowburn that ends tragically like a certain pair of morons from Archives (I love you Jon and Martin but Jesus christ)
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It's Bonzo time bitches!!- Probably one of the most gruesome Magnus statement I've ever listened to (good work Alex) Mr Bonzo completely annihilated some poor dude at his bachelor party. Based on the date of the Incident the I can confidently say that whoever Baz (the groom) was he was our mystery person the OIAR sent Mr Bonzo to get rid of. Along with some of the bloodiest imagery we learned a few things about Bonzo. The most interesting detail is that Bonzo has to be summoned by playing his theme song I think the CD of his theme song acts somewhat like the tapes did in TMA by materialising out of nowhere. Also fun fact you know that torn seam that is right down Bonzo's middle? that is actually is his mouth lined with rows sharp teeth so I guess I know that now (so fun) Moral of the story dont f*ck with Mr. Bonzo
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Alice knows something: Theres been this recurring audio glitch throughout TMAGP thatnks to a few extremly observent fans we have started to relize that these glitches are not at all random and are actually letting the audience know when a character is lying (i actually reposted somones deepdive into all the istances of this glitch so far if you guys are intrested in knowing more) why i bring this up now is becuase since we know when any charater is lying we also know when they are being truthful if there is no glitch when they say somthing and at the end of this episode this interaction occurs
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Alice goes ahead and makes a joke about this to annoy Gwen but the fact theres no audio glitch when she says "I know" means she does actually know who is behind the OIAR and is activly refusing to share it with Gwen or the others. What do you know Alice!?
and that's about it im already loving these next batch of episodes and am so excited to learn more (ERROR has to show up somtime )
thanks to everyone who resonded the poll on the last update I will continue to include drawings into the breakdown even if it takes me a little bit of time to post. anyways I wrote this all in one sitting and I'm about ready to pass out so thanks again and the ask box and comments are always open for discussion and theory crafting.
-Echo
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trans-cuchulainn · 26 days
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Could you recommend some good resources on accurate depiction of parchment in the medieval period? I feel like most people interested in medieval studies have a basic understanding of what it is and how it’s made, but you seem more well-versed than most on its tactile properties and regular use cases. Where can others acquire this knowledge?
most of what i've learned about manuscripts and book history has been either during my degrees or from work (i have worked in various libraries including with special collections, although mostly with early printed books and later paper manuscripts in that capacity). and in terms of what it's like to interact with, i have learned this mostly from interacting with it, but if you don't have a library or museum near you that will enable you to do this, it's a bit harder. this makes it hard to give recommendations although there are lots of very good books out there about books and manuscript history
(there's one i read early on in my journeys with palaeography etc that went into loads of detail about different writing surfaces including wood and wax tablets and so on, but i cannot remember the title and past me did NOT write it down which was really unhelpful. if i remember it i'll post about it)
there are also a ton of online resources about manuscripts though. lots of museums have online guides to manuscript production, parchment, writing through history. there's lots of codicology stuff out there. so it's not like you have to learn it in a formal environment -- that's just where i learned it and therefore mostly from lectures rather than shareable resources
but to understand parchment specifically i think understanding the process of making it is a crucial step to understanding why it is the way it is (and why it's not paper). here's a couple of youtube videos that give an overview
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this is a more detailed video about a project that got people to make parchment themselves which is just kinda interesting (haven't watched it all the way through but am watching parts):
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once you understand how parchment is made and the resources that go into it, i think it's easier to understand why it probably wouldn't be used for ephemera and scraps, and that helps you think about situations where people might use something else -- e.g. a wax tablet to take hasty notes, send messages that don't need to be permanent, send messages that are emphatically not permanent (your recipient can melt it and hide the note), etc -- as well as beginning to rethink the modern world's reliance on the written word in general and consider how oral messages and other non-written communication might have been used
as for the tactile side of things, as i said in a previous post, if you can't touch book parchment, go find your local irish musicians and see if the bodhrán player will let you handle their drum (or good quality orchestral timpani will do too! but with a bigger drum it's harder to feel both sides of the skin). drumskins made of goatskin are very similar on a tactile level to parchment, just a little thicker and not processed to quite the same level as a writing surface. it helps you stop thinking of them as super fragile once you realise people are whacking them with a stick regularly, and you can learn about the difference between the hair side and the flesh side of the skin and stuff and see the way the hair leaves traces in the skin and so on. this helps with the tactile understanding
(the cheaper the bodhran, the rougher the reverse side will be even if the front is still nice and smooth, which also makes you realise the difference between high quality books where you can barely tell which side of the page is the hair side, and low quality ones where they're not fully treated, there's still hair, whatever)
i talked to a conservator lately who told me the way he got into book conservation was via musical instrument repair -- they are more similar than you would think -- and i know trad musicians scattered far and wide enough to be reasonably confident that even if you're in an area with no touchable medieval manuscripts, you can probably at some point find a drummer who will let you play with their bodhrán in exchange for a pint or something, lol
but in the mean time there's lots of cool videos about there about parchment making which i do think is a crucial step to understanding it as a writing surface! and i will see if i can remember the names of any of the books i've read...
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bunnybubae · 1 year
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✍🏻 !FIC REC LIST! 📖
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Hello there! I've been using this platform for the past 6 years, mostly to read the amazing works of super talented writers! I would like to share my all time fave with you and at the same time, show them how mutch their work is appreciated! Here is a list, I'll update it from time to time, reblogging whenever I'll add new works, please remember to support the writers with all the love they deserve by reblogging their fics, by commenting and by using their ask box to share your thoughts! 💜
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🅙🅤🅝🅖🅚🅞🅞🅚
Oh My God, They Were (Quarantined) Roommates by @ot7always 💜
Summary: What do you do when you’re quarantined for months on end with Jeon Jungkook - S tier cuddler, workout robot, and thirst trap extraordinaire? Fuck him, you guess.
Warnings: *takes deep breath* soft dom!Jungkook, sub!reader, dirty talk, vibrator use, fingering, size kink, hair pulling, pussy slapping, degradation, praise, unprotected sex, overstimulation, creampie, multiple orgasms, cum-eating, oral (m&f receiving), marking, spanking, face-fucking, rough sex, morning sex, soft sex, body worship, teasing, rimming, ass-eating, anal fingering, butt plug use, anal sex, cumshot, aftercare (don’t stress, this isn’t all one scene.
—hot boy bummer. (m) by @jungkxook 💜
Summary: when jungkook offers you a proposition of just sex, no strings attached, how can you possibly say no? after all, what are best friends for?
Warnings: kind of a crack fic, sprinkle of angst, way too casual conversations mid-sex, jealous jungkook, slight himbo jungkook tbh (he’s kind of a sweet loveable idiot), he also has a big dick oops, man bun and blonde jungkook to feed my fantasies!, multiple smut scenes!!!, missionary, dry humping, oral sex (m receiving), face fucking, unprotected sex, slight degradation (mostly jungkook hating himself), brief name calling, light choking, sort of praise kink.
I Heard a Rumor. jjk by @taeshobipop 💜
Summary: One slip of a finger, and you realize you’ve liked an Insta photo of college hotshot Jeon Jungkook…from two years ago. You manage to unlike it within seconds, except it’s too late — Damn Kim Namjoon and his lightning-fast eyes. Do not tell a soul, you hiss. The man merely smirks. Next thing you know, a rumor is spread throughout campus. Y/n likes Jungkook…and now he knows.
Warnings: spitting (y/n has a spitting kink don’t ask idk what i was thinking pls it’s not that bad), protected sex, fingering, making out, a little grinding, frat party, alcohol consumption, Namjoon is very unhelpful.
It Takes Two by @junghelioseok 💜
Summary: You don't need retrospect to tell you that dating a coworker was a bad idea. Two months after your breakup, he seems to have moved on to someone new━and quite happily. If his social media is to be believe. Meanwhile, the one new thing in your life is your roommate, Jungkook, who seems nice enough. Just nice enough to coax into coming to your company's annual holiday party, and more than handsome enough to show off a little bit. Or, as it turns out, a lot.
Warnings: slow burn, one (1) awkward boner, tatted!kook, long-haired!kook, oral (f receiving), dirty talk, unprotected sex, multiple orgasms, jk's big dick, squirting.
By Its Cover (M) by @gimmesumsuga 💜
Summary: The one where Jungkook makes a horrifically bad first impression. 
Warnings: Jungkook is actually an absolute sweetheart.  Smut; kissing, handjobs, fingering and unprotected penetrative sex. 
Blizzard (M) by @curly-bangtan 💜
Summary: When a blizzard hits your town, you and your shy awkward roommate are forced to spend time together, not being able to leave the house due to the strong snowstorm. To make matters worse, the power gets cut in the middle of his shower. Which also means no heating.
Warnings: bit of a slow burner, vanilla!Jungkook, virgin!reader, dry humping, penetrative sex, fingering, oral (m receiving), losing virginity, shy soft boy Koo with a crush and a noona kink, your heart could possibly burst from how cute he is.
Liars and Fire (M) by @kpopfanfictrash 💜
Summary: It’s been nearly a year since your divorce was finalized. Why, then, do you still find yourself falling into bed with your ex?
Warnings (Smut): oral (female receiving), some nipple play, fingering, delayed/withheld orgasms.
Warnings (Other): mentions of miscarriage, mentions of therapy, slight jealousy from jungkook.
L is for Lunacy (M) by @kpopfanfictrash 💜
Summary: After two years of being sworn enemies (and 42,000 words of shenanigans), you and Jungkook had finally begun dating. As it turned out though, dating wasn’t any easier than coming up with the perfect witty retort to wipe the smirk from his face. When you came to the first Big Decision of the relationship, it was honestly anyone’s guess as to how things would go.  
Warnings: handcuffs (male + female), oral (male + female), very explicit dirty talk, degradation, semi-public making out, spanking, condom-less sex, cum play, things get soft (except Jungkook’s dick). Seokjin randomly procures invitations to formal events; no one really knows how.
How to Get a Guy. jjk [1] - [2] by @taeshobipop 💜
Summary: Star basketball player Jeon Jungkook has a reputation as the ultimate fuckboi. He’s loved by everyone. Everyone. And you would have followed suit if he had not broken all your strict Roommate Rules™ within the first week of his stay. Jungkook, on the other hand, thinks you’re absolutely bizarre. But there’s a silver lining — Mr. Fuckboi here knows basketball captain Min Yoongi, your dreadfully clueless crush. He strikes up a deal with you: he’ll teach you the ways of flirting if you lessen your load of rules (so Jungkook can continue perusing his way through the ladies on campus). Yet the longer Jungkook spends with you, the more he realizes that maybe he doesn’t want to be the campus fuckboi anymore. The problem is, how does he prove that to you?
Warnings: protected sex, oral (f. receiving), handjob through clothes??, cumming in pants :D, slow burn, a lot of making out, titty sucking, cursing, alcohol consumption from parties, drug (weed) consumption (but not main pairing), marking with nails (not from y/n tho omg), jk sleeps around, and he’s a basketball player oof, honestly jk and y/n are just hella confused.
What's mine is mine by @avveh 💜
Summary: You caught his eye from day one. As far as Jungkook was concerned, you were always meant to be his.
Warnings: Jealous behavior, possessive streaks (a lot…), masturbation, sexting, phone sex, elements of D/S, rough sex, slight impregnating kink, breathplay, degrading names, and copious amounts of dirty talk in general, continued disregard for safe sex THAT SHOULD NOT BE COPIED.
one morning stand (m) by @rendaze 💜
Summary: in which you and jungkook have one night stands with roommates and happen to be sneaking out at the same time.
Warning: don’t be fooled by the first half being fluff lmao; rough sex, a lot of dirty talk (jk will not shut up), heavy degradation (use of ‘slut’, ‘whore’, etc.), consensual slut-shaming (reader is into it), exhibitionism, cumplay, cum swallowing, unprotected sex, breeding kink, reader gets tied up at one point.
Ember Burning (M) by @kpopfanfictrash 💜
Summary: The dragon riders of Duret Ghal are known across the continent; fierce warriors who take to the skies on their leashed, winged beasts. You are the last Dragon Queen of Ashya, ruler of a dying species who can transform from human to Dragon at will. When a new foe emerges which threatens both Dragon and rider alike, you find yourself forced to broker peace with your former enemy. The King of Duret Ghal, and a dragon rider himself: Jeon Jungkook.
NSFW Warnings: oral (male and female), nipple play, fingering, multiple orgasms, big cock, dirty talk, hair pulling (her to him).... tattooed, man-bun jungkook who has a big sword.
Trigger Warnings: somewhat graphic depiction of a shoulder injury.
stars behind waves | jjk (m) by @taegularities 💜
Summary: With a decade’s distance between Jungkook and you, your paths cross on the same island you deemed your second home years ago. And you realise once again – the ocean can never compare to the twinkle in his starry eyes.
Warnings: so so much yearning and pining, gentle fuckboy jk cos i’ve no control over myself, a bit of jealousy, the first kiss, arguments/fighting, unresolved issues, heartbreak, angry confessions; explicit sexual content: making out, asking for permission, dom & big dick jk, handjob in the shower, oral (m. & f. receiving), some clit slapping, some biting, squirting, jk loves her tits... and her ass even more, fingering, protected sex, soft and rough sex, body worship !!, jk is SUCHHH a goner, he comes on her ass, aftercare, praises; so many emotions; lmk if i forgot smth!
The Present by @btssmutgalore 💜
Summary: Your best friend’s boyfriend Jungkook has a special wish for his birthday—you. This maybe wouldn't be such a problem if you weren't into him since the day you'd met him.
Warnings: MFF threesome, oral (M and F receiving), same-sex kissing, unprotected sex (always wrap it, folks), a lot of dirty talk, weird relationship dynamics, extremely mature
ruin you | kth & jjk (m) | masterpost by @taegularities 💜
"it started with a gentle spark and harmless gazes; but by now, you’re caught in a wildfire that will expand until you’re burned inside and out."
Summary of the first part: His eyes hold unfathomable darkness that lures you in, captures your very soul, steals any air you are trying to draw. And you know without a doubt that you're on the path to utter and irrevocable ruination.
Warnings of the first part: explicit sexual content, dom!taehyung, switch!reader (but mostly sub), switch!jungkook, blindfolding, some bondage (reader gets tied up), wax play, lots of dirty talk, oral (f. & m. receiving), fingering, kinda praise kink, rough sex, messy sex, unprotected sex (you know it folks, be careful), like one spank?, light choking, breast play, cuckolding/voyeurism kinda (yes - jungkook is into watching), swearing, y/n probably can’t walk the next day and she loves it, threesome (obviously)
idealizations concerning real life relations | jjk (m) by @venusiangguk 💜
Summary: jungkook loves to be loved, but he doesn’t love in return.
Warnings: jk is so sweet, but also so evil lmao, oc lives in her little noggin, angsty fwb, drug and alcohol use, tattoos, multiple smut scenes that include: oral (m/f), fingering (f), light face slapping (with hand and cock??), praise, degradation, marking, dirty talk, so many creampies yum, multiple orgasms, kissing :(, cumming in pants :), probably more but i cant think of it, ok other stuff now, manipulation, infidelity, oc thinks jk is made of stars :(, jk thinks she is so pretty :(, misunderstandings, some fluff if you squint, brunette jk, blonde jk, n blue jk,  1 mentions of: howls moving castle, too many mentions of: stars, the color pink
A Holiday Snowdown (M) by @kpopfanfictrash 💜
Summary: The Inn on the Hill is in trouble. Or that's what your boss, Namjoon, says during the last-minute All Staff holiday meeting he calls. You need money, and you need money fast, or his parents are planning to sell the resort. When no one can think of an easy solution, Namjoon proposes his parents' idea: a weeklong social media blitz with a celebrity guest. The celebrity? None other than Jungkook Jeon himself: two-time Olympic gold medalist, world-class snowboarder and the nation's sweetheart. What's the problem? You happen to have met Jungkook Jeon before, and sincerely hoped you'd never see him again.
Rating/Warnings: 18+ for sexual content. Fingering, oral (female receiving), hand job, mutual masturbation, breast play, some face riding, dirty talk, orgasm denial, clit smacking (is there a non plural form of this?), cum shot on chest. Mentions of past death (does not occur during story). Ankle injury (non-graphic). Yoongi is an enthusiastic MC. Bam is adorable. Jungkook has both lip and eyebrow piercing
Sugarplum Elegy (M) by @bymoonchild 💜
Summary: You know no bounds nor depth with Jungkook. While your fuck buddy loves sleeping in your bed and doing laundry for you with his favourite fabric softener, you are in love with a mysterious honeyed, velvety voice on Soundcloud. All’s fine, until you find out that the voice that metaphors your heart to a sweet sugarplum melody actually belongs to the boy who has been taking up a special spot in your bed and in your heart, strumming at your heartstrings all this while.
Warnings: Explicit language, hopeless and helpless pining, constipated feelings, lots of smut, rimming, cum-eating, spitting, blowjob, fingering, classroom sex, Jungkook is emotionally constipated but wbk 
Bunny [1] - [2] - [3] by @btssmutgalore 💜
Summary: An anonymous streamer puts on a show every couple of days. When you become one of his biggest fans, your social life takes a hit��you'd rather stay glued to your laptop and stare at him than go out and meet men in real life. But, what if?
Warnings: Oral (m and f receiving), intercourse, dirty talk, unprotected sex
blackout | jjk [1] - [2] - [3] by @jjungxkook 💜
Summary: Utility bills shooting up like this should be an international crime. Luckily, Jungkook has the perfect idea(s) to save up money and make your night sinfully unforgettable.
Warnings: swearing, he’s just a bit of a fuckboy, bickering, swooning over/thirsting for jk (🤷‍♀️), a manually induced fake blackout? dunno those 2 are odd k, they play uno, a lot of spending time in the darkness, kook has no chill, teasing, consent, dirty talk, fingering, cmnf for a while, sexual tension, oral (both receiving), shower sex, choking, hair pulling, reader cries a bit, jk likes to praise, dry humping?, pussy and tits slapping rip (and some ass ig), making out🙄, manhandling, jk loves her tits and ass and plays with them (a lot), he’s sweet but cocky too, protected sex, dom + big dick kook
Love to Hate (Master List) by @kpopfanfictrash 💜
Summary: Born with a silver spoon in your mouth, you've done your best to rid yourself of the taste since you were old enough to walk. Occasionally though, your mother manages to rope you into an obligatory function—or a blind date with playboy bilionaire, Jeon Jungkook. Jungkook stands for everything you loathe about the world you left behind, but you can't deny the spark of attraction between you. Intrigued by the promise of mutual satisfaction, you agree to one night in bed... and quickly realize you're in far, far deeper than you ever intended.
Warnings of the first part: semi-public nudity, slight voyeurism, dirty talk (mention of a threesome, mention of restraints), nipple play, fingering, spanking, oral (male), face-fucking, multiple orgasms, slight possessiveness, jungkook calls y/n sweetheart and princess; seokjin is not in the fic (yet), I'm sorry about that.
Dilf Jk: Series Masterlist [The Art Of] by @venusiangguk 💜
Summary: you find a baby in your store and in turn, a dilf finds you.
Warnings of the first part: cute baby!!!, jk being a good dad, he likes to garden :(, dom jk, sub oc, age gap, handjob, coming in pants, AYOOO OC GOT A FAT COOCHIE, lowkey body worship, fat coochie supremacy, oral (m/f), safe sex, sexual tension, praise, multiple orgasms, eye contact, jk likes to watch 🥴, asking for permission, jk’s lowkey controlling i guess but it’s soft and like not toxic lol, PLAYFUL use of the word ‘daddy’, no actual daddy kink 🙄, dirty talk
Mind in the Gutter (M) by @kpopfanfictrash 💜
Summary: Starting over is never fun. Especially not when you decide to take the phrase fully to heart; new job, new city, new coworkers and new relationships. When you are dragged to a happy hour by your new co-worker, Taehyung, you end up sitting beside a (very) cute, (very) shy IT worker named Jungkook. Several drinks later, he mentions he is in a professional bowling league with his friends and you rather enthusiastically invite yourself along. As time passes and you begin to grow closer, you still find it impossible to read Jungkook. Working in the same company and seeing each other so often, it is only so long before one of you snaps. But who? (HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY JUNGKOOK!)
Warnings: dirty talk, thigh-grinding, public make-out sesh, inappropriate bowling innuendo, Jungkook’s abs, light choking.
Over the Edge (M) by @kpopfanfictrash 💜
Summary: so, you’re dating. everything is dandy, the sex is knocking your socks off, but what happens when you get in the First Real Fight? 
Warnings: semi-public sex, mirror sex, dirty talk (slight degradation), unprotected sex, a sweaty locker room
A Thousand Reasons Why | jjk (M) by @taegularities 💜
Summary: “And if all of this experience was indeed a dream, you chose to stay just a little longer.” After leaving to work towards his dream rather than the bonds that shackle him to home, you didn’t expect to see Jungkook again years later at your best friend’s wedding. And even less, for love to rekindle at second glance.
Warnings: a whole laundry list tf: (past) minor character death, somewhat toxic parents, (mentions of) gambling, blond & then 5th muster pied piper (fuckboy) jk lol, this jimin, jealousy, alcohol consumption, unrequited love (not between jk & oc), friends fighting; explicit multiple (2) sex scenes that include: dom & big dick!jk, light hair pulling, marking, tiddie sucking/breast play, clit pinching, pussy slapping, soft & rough sex, praising, biting, some spit ig, oral (f. & m.), fingering, handjob, consent <3, cockwarming, squirting, oversensitivity, multiple orgasms, mouth fucking,… uhh, consensual drunk sex, protected & unprotected sex…. yeah
The Boy with Galaxies in his Eyes | jjk by @oddinary4bts
Summary: you had never thought the night sky could be found in someone’s eyes. That is, until you met Jeon Jungkook and his gravity pulled you in. Will he crush you with the galaxies in his eyes, or will you learn to explore his worlds and make them yours?
Warnings: oc’s ex-boyfriend died and it takes an important place in the story, swearing, fuckboy Jungkook, fuckgirl oc, a whole bunch of red flags, miscommunication (they learn how to communicate don’t worry), exes that can’t stay out of your life, alcohol, they be a little toxic but they get better, explicit content: fingering, pussy slapping, squirting, oral sex (male and female receiving), mouth fucking, dirty talking, jungkook has a slight begging kink and an exhibitionism kink (not that present in the fic), dom!jk, switch!reader, car sex, sex in a tent, hair pulling (I think), tits/nipple play, unprotected sex, a little bit of ass slapping, mentions of choking
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buskingalbatross · 1 month
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I've been a part of the phandom since I was fourteen back in 2012, but i've only recently deviated from my lurker ways and started being active in this community on tumblr. which I have been enjoying immensely! I'm super confused about something however, and so i'm making a post about it. please help.
often when I see the word "parasocial" used among the dnp audience, I've noticed that it's used with really negative connotations. Or with the implication that having a parasocial relationship is inherently bad and terrible. today, for instance, I've seen the term parasocial likened directly to "creepy."
I'd like to ask why that is-what has led to the perception of a parasocial relationship in this fandom as one that is intrinsically invasive and creepy. And I'd like also to put forth my own thoughts on why I think it's unhelpful and incorrect that we use this term to be a near synonym for creepy.
first, a definition. I'm turning to Hank Green for this, as he succinctly sums up what a parasocial relationship is in this vlogbrothers video (a recommended watch). He says a parasocial relationship forms "when the parts of your brain that are designed to have a social relationship between you and another person are used to have a relationship with a person who does not know who you are or, sometimes, cannot know who you are... because they're Huckleberry Finn."
At its most basic, a parasocial relationship is a relationship between you and someone fictional or nonfictional who doesn't know who you are. Hank goes on to say, importantly! that parasocial relationships have been happening since the beginning of time. People have been fans of famous or talented people since time immemorial, people have cared for fictional people since the first stories were told among humans.
~ ✌🏻continued below✌🏻 ~
Similarly, in one of his Am I The Hole videos, Phil says that becoming obsessed with things is normal. "People hyperfixate on stuff. It's fine." We all do it.
In many ways, parasocial relationships are as natural as myriad other forms of human bonds. Humans can't help but connect to each other. To other living and even non-living things. Bonding and connecting and forming communities is what we do. And because of that, I think it's a disservice to oneself be ashamed of being in a parasocial relationship, or to use parasocial as a term to serve as a stand in for a disrespectful fan of someone. I think it fosters a sense of guilt where there shouldn't necessarily be any, especially if you as a viewer of Dan and Phil are respecting the boundaries they have set. You are doing something so normal! So human! You are finding support and comfort and empowerment and motivation and creativity and any number of other things from other people.
There is great joy and great good that can come from parasocial relationships. Obviously! Think of Phil's birthday stream, the feelings you experienced when the lights came on in the theater after TATINOF, all the laughs (among other things) Dan and Phil have gotten from our memes and art.
And it's important to consider the other side of this as well. Dan and Phil also have a parasocial relationship with us. It's different, of course, but they do think of us, make decisions because of us, without truly knowing us. At different points in time maybe they know the loudest of us, a few individuals, but for the most part they do not know who we are. They don't know who you are. But they do think about you. They think about what ties us together, our queerness, our beliefs about the world, the internet, our status as socially awkward and or mentally ill nerds etc. They think about how certain videos or projects or merch will be received. All creators are in a relationship with their audience. And it is often a parasocial one.
Basically i find myself exasperated with stumbling over the word 'parasocial' in this fandom. I want to have the information and know the truth and add my own thoughts! Maybe parasocial is used by other people elsewhere on the internet to mean something bad, but my thesis is this: it's not a bad word. It's a descriptor. And it's a normal thing. Those people are wrong. You shouldn't feel bad about being in a parasocial relationship with Dan and Phil! You should call that relationship what it is with pride! And do as much good with it as you can.
conclusion: talk to me about this! What is your perspective, what am I missing? let me know please. would be happy to talk about this with anyone.
(ok what do i do now do i thank you for reading? i don't do this. text post over.)
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botanyshitposts · 1 year
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just wanted to say that some months ago i went on a bit of a "mental illness tangent" and wrote down every single native species to my county, including its light and water needs. may or may not have been spurred on by some topic you mentioned...
one side effect i learned with that is that apparently i live in like. the ONE area of the us that doesn't really use fire much as a part of it's ecosystem, once you're inland beyond the pine barrens on the coast, obvs. kinda funny idk. like you have a whole continent that has large fire use in varying ways, and then in little old new england in the old mountains where apparently fire has not been present in 8000 years from research from sediments.
hi! just want you to know that this is both academic and political direct action in my mind and i think every community should have at least one person who knows what local Guys are supposed to be there and what they need.
next step would be to go see which ones you can actually find in remnant forests and stuff. if any dudes are missing it's an active cause for concern and you can start the process of finding Whoever In Local Government Is In Charge Of That, and you would be surprised to know that usually there is at least one person who's like, kind of supposed to be in charge of it but nobody pays attention to plants so it slipped under the radar, etc. or if you want to do more research first or want to know where to look you can go try to see when it was last actually spotted, because from my experience a lot of old sources from like, 1802 just get grandfathered in to modern records and you realize nobody's actually checked to see if these things are still there lately.
to check your own work against, plants.usda.gov has an online database that in theory is an up-to-date record of all plants in every state in the country-- notice that i say every state, because not all states specify sightings or populations by county, which is unhelpful for actually going out and seeing them near you. on a state-by-state basis, some states have their own databases which narrow it down to county, and then from there you can see which sources they cite and check to see how old they are. note that the usda cites the flora of north america as their primary source for the species ive personally come across, which is good because the flora of north america is crowd-funded, organized, written, and published by actual academics in the botanical community who go searching for these things and they have names and email addresses you can use to contact them, plus the completed families are free to access online on their website. because of the amount of people retiring with no replacement, however, it's still good to follow up.
im...nebulous on my understanding of who is supposed to be checking up on these guys in the government. either the USDA or the fish and wildlife service is the arm that's supposed to be regulating plants listed as endangered in your area, or at least enforcing poaching laws, and if it's something high profile they probably do, but then you look at the endangered species list in your state and see a guy you know hasn't been seen in quite some time and you have to wonder where they're getting their data, if they're doing their own internal surveys, if you can even access that kind of information because of the need to be careful around disclosing the locations of endangered plants, if this local Guy has actually genuinely slipped through the cracks of bureaucracy and has lost whatever fractionally small area of land it used to have in your county/surrounding county/state, if anybody is even paying attention, etc. it seems like your best bet comes down to contacting the one other person whos super into them
and then you go on inaturalist to see if anyone else has seen it and nobody has and anyway thats how you go insane
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I'm fed up.
I've seen another of these posts where they say "high functioning" ND and autists have it "good", or whatever.
Being "high functioning" doesn't make it less of a struggle. Just a different kind of struggle.
I'm "supposed" to be better at life if my symptoms are "lesser", if I'm abled to mask so well, right?
Wrong.
I'm just in an eternal loop of burn-out and anxiety.
By being categorised "high functioning", by being unseen, I fell through the cracks. That means I didn't get any help, I was on my own. I'm expected to be a successful, self-reliant adult and I'm clearly not. I'm a mess.
I'm invisible. That's no cool super-power, believe me.
People just asks me "what's wrong with you?" but expects me to be like them. "High functioning" is bullshit. That's not a grocery lists of symptoms you have to check. That's not a badge to earn. You can never speak a word and use AAC full time and not being able to "take the joke" and fake your way in this allistic world, and still being a functioning adult that isn't breaking down every two minutes. Which one is "high functioning", tell me?
It depends of your definition of "functioning", I guess.
There's no high or low, just different experiences.
And just because you can do something doesn't mean you don't need help with it. Because being able to do something doesn't mean you can't suffer from it. It doesn't mean you want to have to battle and cry and bleed to do it.
I'm just so tired of this "high functioning" bullshit.
Find another word, people.
*
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I'll add, a bit more calmly, that what I think is wrong with this is the criterias people uses to decide if it's low or high functioning.
It's based on the symptoms and traits neuroatypicals finds jarring (and thus make the diagnosis criterias) instead on looking on negative effects the disorder have on us, beside, you know, the things that make us stand out.
I know autists that are "obviously autistic", that get accommodations, and I see them thrive. In the meanwhile, I see autists that are categorised as "high functioning" that are chronically depressed because they got to a point where they can't cope anymore. Masking and living unseen and unhelped in the allistic world is exhausting and traumatic.
I'm not saying "low functioning" ND have it good. Certainly not so. There's horrific things done to so many of them because allistic people want to "cure" them and make them "normal". So, no, they don't have it good.
What I'm trying to say is, different experiences make different results, but you can't say one is worse than the other.
That's what anger me with these posts I've seen. That people erases my struggles because of some misconceptions about my life and how I experience it.
I just want a peaceful community linked by our similarities, where we can learn from our differences, instead of fighting over petty things like stuffs like this. What's the point of a feud?
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