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#I love him but holy hell he does not deserve anything less than what he got
admirableadmiranda · 1 year
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Jin Guangyao is a man who commits to murder as his first and only recourse for all of life’s troubles. A true and proper lu cha biao who got all he deserved in life and more. May he rest forever in the rage hatred murder coffin with Nie Mingjue and never make it out again.
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thefairyhills · 7 months
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✧・゚: *✧・゚* A COLLECTION OF QUOTES THAT LIVE IN MY HEAD RENT-FREE.
as the title says, this is a list of quotes from books, movies, song lyrics, videogames, pinterest posts and anything else that has been stuck in my brain forever, for one reason or another. a part 2 may or may not follow. adapt any gendered terms as needed!
❝ to love is to destroy, and to be loved is to be the one destroyed. ❞
❝ there are no men like me. only me. ❞
❝ the heart is an arrow. it demands aim to land true. ❞
❝ give me back my girlhood, it was mine first. ❞
❝ stories connect us to our past. they shape a people in profound ways. without them, we are lost. ❞
❝ everyone loves strength, but do you love me for my weakness? ❞
❝ i wish that i could say i am a light that never goes out, but i flicker from time to time. ❞
❝ just between us, did the love affair maim you too? ❞
❝ when the world owed you nothing, you demanded something of it anyway. ❞
❝ death doesn't discriminate between the sinners and the saints. ❞
❝ when they shattered our spirit, we became sharpest at the break. ❞
❝ she didn't want to be loved for her petals, she wanted to be loved for her thorns. she knew if someone loved her flaws, they would love her whole. ❞
❝ to love someone is firstly to confess: i'm prepared to be devastated by you. ❞
❝ love speaks in flowers. truth requires thorns. ❞
❝ because saving the people you love isn't stupid. it isn't even a choice. ❞
❝ don't go where i can't follow. ❞
❝ whatever our souls are made of, his and mine are the same. ❞
❝ it takes grace to remain kind in cruel situations. ❞
❝ there's some good in this world, and it's worth fighting for. ❞
❝ the water hears and understands. the ice does not forgive. ❞
❝ i am my scars. ❞
❝ that's the thing about pain. it demands to be felt. ❞
it's not your fault i ruin everything. and it's not your fault i can't be what you need. ❞
❝ i'm not interested in being polite or heterosexual. ❞
❝ the flower that blooms in adversity is the most rare and beautiful of all. ❞
❝ you were the one who wanted to win. and i just wanted a sister. ❞
❝ you know how scared i am of elevators. never trust it if it rises fast, it can't last. ❞
❝ i am not ruined. i am ruination. ❞
❝ all my flowers grew back as thorns. ❞
❝ if i can't have love i want power. ❞
❝ i came out to attack people, and i'm honestly having such a good time right now. ❞
❝ anger was better than tears, better than grief, better than guilt. ❞
❝ i'm meaner than my demons. ❞
❝ i love her, and that's the beginning and end of everything. ❞
❝ you are haunted, like every other holy thing. ❞
❝ my skin has turned to porcelain, to ivory, to steel. ❞
❝ innocence died screaming, honey, ask me i should know. ❞
❝ what is infinite? the universe and the greed of men. ❞
❝ i could never hold a perfect thing and not demolish it. ❞
❝ how could somebody ever love me? ❞
❝ you don't get to destroy someone and decide how ruined they're allowed to feel. ❞
❝ i am afraid of you. in loving me, you hold a knife at my throat. in loving you, i tell you exactly where to cut. ❞
❝ because i take things away from stupid, evil old men. it's what i do. ❞
❝ they deserve to lose everything. and i deserve to have all their stuff. ❞
❝ tell me, if he handed you a bloodied hand, would you take it, just because it was his? ❞
❝ hell is empty and all the devils are here. ❞
❝ i desire the things that will destroy me in the end. ❞
❝ i have tried loving less but that hurts just the same. ❞
❝ wanting was enough. for me, it was enough to live for the hope of it all. ❞
❝ the only heaven i'll be sent to is when i'm alone with you. ❞
❝ i could recognize him by touch alone, by smell; i would know him blind, by the way his breaths came and his feet struck the earth. i would know him in death, at the end of the world. ❞
❝ these violent delights have violent ends. ❞
❝ we love with claws and teeth and the blood is just proof of how much. it's feral. and it's relentless. ❞
❝ feelings that come back are feelings that never left. ❞
❝ good for you, you're doing great out there without me. god, i wish that I could do that. ❞
❝ if i could hold you for a minute, darling, i'd go through it again. ❞
❝ i don't like that anyone would die to feel your touch. ❞
❝ i don't like that falling feels like flying 'til the bone crush. ❞
❝ and logically, you're the last thing i should have on my mind, but i want you there sometimes. ❞
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bugsbenefit · 9 months
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mike apparently has more trauma then el will and max to some of you let’s be real you guys keep creating problems for that kid to have. Hell some of you give their problems to HIM like what’s up with all the father abuse shit, we don’t know anything about Ted only that he’s an absent father. He’s not abusive like Lonnie is mike is not getting abused. Mike also didn’t go through upside down shit he’s just the side character helping el and Will since s2 let’s be fr. “Has connections to all the characters” so does hopper. Sure his character arc needs to be done but he’s not gonna be as important as el and will or heck max because she’s literally in a coma and we don’t know her fate.
I can still watch the show and not care about this guy it’s very easy to do the duffers made him unlikable anyway. If byler does happen im okay with it because it’s what Will deserves but if I were to write the show mike would not be with him. He would be with a less annoying person. But going back to him just not being as important it’s literally true I remember the fandom hating on mike when season 4 just finished but ppl have deluded themselves so hard they made him 100000 issues to uwufy him so they could excuse all the weird shit he’s done. “Hes seen wills body come out of the water” so did all his friends why are we always focusing on this kid when Will has other friends.
If I were to write the show Will would also be interacting with all the rest of the characters instead of being glued to mikes side. But that’s just me haaha
i swear is this all the same person??? what's in the water today?
and holy shit can someone finally tell me where the people are hiding that "steal" other characters plots? Mike has more trauma than anyone else... who ever said that. where are the Ted is physcially abusive people i've never seen them... have you considered just unfollowing accounts that say things that annoy you? because i've never seen any of these takes, only people complaining about them, and i'm doing great vibing on my dash
and please do tell me how Hopper has connections to all the characters, i'd love to hear your reasoning for this. Hopper has never interacted with Lucas, Dustin or Max. also none of the teens like Nancy or Jonathan. if i wanted to make the argument that Anyone else could somehow have as many on screen relationships as Mike (there isn't anyone) Hopper would be one of the last people i'd go for because he only exists in direct relation to the Byers and El plots. he doesn't get involved with anyone outside of those
nothing of what you're saying is even worth arguing with at this point, you're just really mad about a character existing and trying to rationalize how that character won't be important for the finale despite that being where the story is headed. Mike isn't going to "steal" anyone's plots or traumas i don't know why you even think that. he's a separate character with individual experiences and unique trauma. he's not going to take anything away from other characters
"why are we focusing on Mike" have you heard of cinematography before? ask the show why we're constantly getting close ups of Mike crying in these situations instead of Will's other friends. i'm not sitting here zooming in on Mike's face anytime something happens to Will or El. the show is nice and already blast the close up right over our screens because shockingly Mike's reactions seem to matter here somehow
but anyway explaining all of this to someone who just wants to complain is probably a waste of time. but as you already pointed out yourself, you're not the one writing the show so what you would do is thankfully irrelevant
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childofchrist1983 · 11 months
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Ye have heard that it was said of them of old time, Thou shalt not kill; and whosoever shall kill shall be in danger of the judgment: But I say unto you, That whosoever is angry with his brother without a cause shall be in danger of the judgment: and whosoever shall say to his brother, Raca, shall be in danger of the council: but whosoever shall say, Thou fool, shall be in danger of hell fire. - Matthew 5:21-22 KJV
When Jesus Christ threw the money-changers out of the temple, He was angry. Was He breaking His own rule or being sinful? No! He was righteous in His anger and for good reason - The money-changers were cheating the people, and doing it in the holy temple of all places! Turning it into "a den of theives" (Matthew 21:12-13, Mark 11:17)
There are things that should make us angry: Seeing someone being abused is a good example! But these days, it seems that anything can cause anger and people react violently with the slightest provocation. Thinking that someone insults you, for example, can lead to a fight. Road rage is another example of this. What about using foul and abusive language? That is so common that people often don't even hear it, much less correct themselves. What has happened to us? We used to be so kind to one another! We are all God's creation. As Christians, we are all God's beloved children. We often forget that abusive language and any other sin can mourn and weaken the Holy Spirit. The love of Jesus Christ and His Holy Word and Spirit can and will bind us together and we must make sure that we seek and lean on Him daily. May we be righteous in our anger and save our anger for injustices that we can help to change, calling out sin while still treating one another as Jesus would do and with the respect that's deserved. Keep the faith and keep moving forward in your walk with Jesus!
Thank Father God Almighty and the LORD Jesus Christ for His Holy Word and for sending His Holy Spirit so that we might have His grace, not only to awaken us and transform our hearts in our spiritual rebirth and guarantee our eternity with Him, but to also call upon Him whenever we are in need. Thank Father God Almighty and the LORD Jesus Christ for all the reminders of His love and mercy and faithfulness within His Holy Word. He is bigger than any challenge or circumstance in our lives. Knowing this within our minds and our hearts, nothing can deter our faith in Him and His Truth. May we all accept Him and His eternal gift of salvation and ask that He would transform our hearts and lives according to His will and ways. Thank Father God Almighty and the LORD Jesus Christ for His Holy Spirit who saves, seals and leads us. May we always thank Father God Almighty and the LORD Jesus Christ for His almighty power and saving grace. For He is our strength, and He alone is able to save us, forgive our sins and gift us eternal salvation and entry into His Kingdom of Heaven.
May we make sure that we give our hearts and lives to God and take time to seek and praise Him and share His Truth with the world daily. May the LORD our God and Father in Heaven help us to stay diligent and obedient and help us to guard our hearts in Him and His Holy Word daily. May He help us to remain faithful and full of excitement to do our duty to Him and for His glorious return and our reunion in Heaven as well as all that awaits us there. May we never forget to thank the LORD our God and our Creator and Father in Heaven for all this and everything He does and has done for us! May we never forget who He is, nor forget who we are in Christ and that God is always with us! What a mighty God we serve! What a Savior this is! What a wonderful Lord, God, Savior and King we have in Jesus Christ! What a loving Father we have found in Almighty God! What a wonderful God we serve! His will be done!
Thanks and glory be to God! Blessed be the name of the LORD! Hallelujah and Amen!
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bpd-shuichi-togo · 1 year
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this is suuuuch a fun question yippee
toji: his entire piglet era was pretty repugnant, but he hurt himself with that first and foremost and he's in recovery now love and light
shuichi: taking advantage of/facilitating the spread of the app, which endangered literally all of tokyo and enabled the machinations of the very people who put him and all the other clones through hell, but also was inevitable so like 🤍 vriska moment + i don't think he should be judged that harshly for it. he's DEFINITELY killed someone though, almost certainly more than one person. also considering he fights with a non-app weapon, he's like, 100% severely injuring other players on a fairly regular basis but 🤍 he's allowed to do that. he gets both a girlboss pass and a 'loves his baby brother' pass, in addition to the neurodivergent and a minor card, which adds up to him being a perfect blameless darling actually 🤍. also outing claude to babs' would have been pretty fucked up if she didn't literally deserve it
duo: holy SHIT. what he puts shuichi through in faking his kidnapping through chapters 7/8, then The Confrontation & staged abandonment in 8, and then by chapter 9 exposing him as a clone to CLAUDE of all people. just like, the way he treats shuichi in the main story (and likely other loops as well if the yog dungeon loop is any indication), very deliberately manipulating his emotions, is... disturbing. all to maneuver him into actions THAT SHUICHI GLADLY WOULD HAVE DONE IF HE'D JUST ASKED. like, you examine it and you can understand where he's coming from! but the fact that he genuinely loves his brother & Does All That to Help and doesn't seem to be acting out of resentment for him at all just makes it more disturbing imo, even if it does arguably make it slightly less Morally fucked intentions-wise. like there's something about a patronizing sort of callousness, especially to that extreme, that's just like Worse to me than a callousness borne from plain old resentment. (you have to wonder who he's even modeling this behaviour from 😶). but then you think about the Genius role he's trying to emulate, and why he's trying to emulate that role and it's like... what other way was there for this to unfold lol. cainbaiting aside, there's also his tendency to set off Exceptions in populated areas, which i think would literally be a war crime, but he gets a baby pass for that one 💛. (ADDING THIS AS I WRITE BABS' SECTION) hey actually how much of what went down in chapter 8 did duo deliberately engineer
cullen: creating life frankenstein-wise alongside bertro & aisaac i GUESS 🙄. f to breke or w/e but she was literally playing house with her brothers, baby pass 💙. also she wasn't especially nice to him i GUESS, but like... from WHOM exactly is she supposed to learn the value of life lol? let alone treating the life you create with the consideration it deserves? it's obvious where she's modeling that behaviour from! baby pass, and if you say anything bad about her i kill you in real life 💙
bertro: having a frankenstein moment as well 🙄. also dropping the moon on tokyo in an attempt to permanently kill literally everyone, but like. it's quite likely memphis tennesse manipulated him into doing that, and even if not you LITERALLY cannot blame him.
avi/aisaac: frankenstein again, but aside from that. complicated question. at the very end of chapter moon, it was set up that aisaac has been like... enforcing the facility's continued control over the other Geniuses, but to my understanding, that was dropped in his debut chapter. it's still true in my heart though. but another thing that's true in my heart is that the aisaac that would have acted as the facility's enforcer isn't the same ai that the original isaac (avi) created. aside from that, he seems to have like... SERIOUSLY fucked some people up mentally? tenuous baby pass until further notice
arc: straight up war crimes! but their mom asked them to really niceys and they feel reallyyyy bad about it sooooo.... they still are willing to literally torture people outside of those circumstances but it's REALLY funny. to me. the neurodivergent and a minor card does not excuse them being catholic however :/
babalon: another holy SHIT, in much the same vein as duo's. the sheer destruction wrought on the walled-in wards aside, bc it's not clear how much of that the finishers were directly responsible for & moreover because it was inevitable/deliberately engineered by the people actually holding the cards. 😬 (edits duo's section). and also because she was right! but her manipulation of the protag and especially arc, who she had to have known wouldn't be able to bear being responsible for the destruction she was planning in addition to the destruction she had outright asked them to cause- the fact that she manipulates them for that reason, specifically to absolve them of responsibility. going so far as sacrifice azathoth- one of her other children, more helpless than either arc or the protag- specifically to unbalance them. the scene where she STABS HERSELF ON BOUNDLESS TAIL... if the protag were an actual character that probably would have been one of the MOST traumatizing things to happen to them. babs was the MOST impactful antag in the game to me, and she was horrifying as she was sympathetic. very interesting compare/contrast to duo now that i think about it.
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strawberriemars · 16 days
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YOU KNOW THE DRILL 🌺,🍩,💀
ELODDIIIEEEEEEE
LESS FUCKEN GOOOOOOO
🌺- Do they have any love interest(s)?
bih as if you don't already know lmao
Buggy. She met him because someone contracted her to get information about Shanks, but ended up partying with him and letting loose in a way she'd never been able to before in her old life. Granted, at first they both just saw what they wanted out of each other (information on her side, "holy shit a unicorn lemme just try and schmooze her to join the crew" on his side, eventually FWB on both sides), but the more they ran into each other over the course of the time skip, she got. Attached.
By the time Buggy realized he also caught feelings Elodie was regularly working for him as an informant for Buggy's Delivery. He 100% believes he doesn't deserve her but she's like "you make me laugh and don't make me do shit I don't want to do, and [excessively dumps about abusive relationships in the past] so yeah idgaf what you think you deserve bc you make me happy"
🍩  -Who is your OC’s arch-nemesis or rival?
Jokingly, Adelaide bc she wrote some scathing, scandalous, and quite exaggerative articles about Buggy (to be fair she's done that to just about everyone except Shanks, Black Beard, and the Straw Hats). Though because Buggy's like hell bent on petty-ass revenge, Elodie gets low-key jealous of the diversion of his attention, so she more than likely would hoof-stomp Adelaide on sight.
In all seriousness, I wouldn't necessarily call it a rival or nemesis so much as an outright threat to her safety, but she might have several Skypeians who want her dead for uh. Reasons not unrelated to stabbing someone with her horn (albeit in self defense).
💀  - Does your OC have any phobias?
Funnily enough, heights. And triskaidecaphobia - not to an extreme degree but she 100% refuses to have anything on her ship in quantities of 13. If she has 14 of a thing and sells 1, she gives another for free just to avoid that.
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winderlylandchime · 6 months
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1/2 And we are now on 5x09, his only request for the episode is that Britin gets back together bc there’s only 2 cds left so they dont have much time: ‘how am I supposed to dance to the intro song when nothing in the show is how it’s supposed to be?’ The ep starts with Mikey and Ben having sex ‘not to be a prick but that is also not what i asked for. (The scene with the ladies for vote yes on prop 14 happens) *starts laughing* this is the only funny thing Mike has done in this season’ ‘look how Brian has been hanging with Emy and Ted lately but they don’t want me to see it. Ugh Mike. GOOD BRIAN! Ignore him. Forever!’ Deb asks mikey if him and Brian will ever talk again ‘oh look who cares now! Little miss “you gotta let Mikey go”. Mike doesn’t deserve Brian for what he said to him. Fuck you Mike, how about you tell her what you said to him? Fuck this whole shit show.’ Justin is about to meet Tucker! ‘OH? YOU GO GIRL! LOOK AT MY GIRL! That should’ve been me with her.’ ‘Now why is he passive aggressive to Jen? Why does he keep acting like a little shit? *pauses tv on jen standing in front of Justins painting* tell me that shit doesn’t look like something Brian would hang above his bed. Or in his office! Anyway *starts ep again* justin…you dated a kazoo player with a bad goatee, youre nobody to judge. Why is he so fucking horrible to Jen? HES JUDGING ABOUT AGE GAPS?! Bro, you need to fucking chill, shes a grown ass woman who can do whatever she wants…even if its not me’ and we are at the Brian/Debbie scene ‘look how pretty he looks. Debbie! If she’s here for Mike, she has to go. But if its for Blondie, than come on in. GET HIGH TOGETHER! HELL YEAH! *points to Brian smoking* i know damn well that fucker smokes in real life. One of me! See, we would be friends (i make a joke about how theyd only bond over cigarettes and thats it) i have bonded with people over far less! You’d be amazed at my ability to connect over anything. (Debbie says she doesnt like how hes been treating mikey) EXCUSE ME?! HE? WHAT ABOUT MIKE? You know what? Get out. Mike is always a fucking victim. Nobody ever stands up for Brian. Except me! *points at Brian* i think i used to have that zip up hoodie..you know who else fell in love Deb? brian! Now lets talk about that instead. *puts his cast up and spins his left index finger around his cast* here’s mikey and here’s the world. Not everything is about him. Can she please realize that her son is a little shit to Brian too? Why is he always the one who has to compromise and sacrifice? Man, fuck this whole show’ And that scene with the store being broken in is on ‘well shit. Not to be a dick but *sings very horribly* karmaaaa. Fuck now i feel bad for saying that but also fuck him for hurting Brian’ The Drew/Em scene is up now ‘HOLY SHIT DREW CAME OUT! AHHHHH YOU GO BOY! A guy like him? Bro fuck you. YEAH EMMETT HELPED HIM! Wait. HOLY FUCKING SHIT HE KISSED HIM ON LIVE TV! OH MY GOD!’ And we are at the gallery now ‘ive been so busy with everything else, i forgot about this. (Justin makes a face at the critic)*points to Justin* this! Is the fucking look and reaction he would give to Brian during that stupid dinner the second Marty and Elliot opened their mouth. And i know I’m right. Why is he calling the critic a cunt tho?’
That Ben/Mikey scene is only tolerable because they piss off that homophobe. THE ONLY REASON I ALLOW IT.
Justin being such a little shit to Tucker further confirms the writers decided to change his character is inexplicable ways. The Justin we knew would high five Jen about getting a hottie mchotterson
You’d be amazed at my ability to connect over anything. <- I do not doubt this is the case. Your brother has tumblr friends he doesn't even know about.
Why is he always the one who has to compromise and sacrifice? Man, fuck this whole show MMHMM
HOLY FUCKING SHIT HE KISSED HIM ON LIVE TV! OH MY GOD! Emmett getting the love he deserves (btw Cat Emmettt is being a little shit as I write my responses to these. He's been sick for most of the year and I'm glad he's feeling better but BRO CHILL TF OUT)
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ducknotinarow · 2 years
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[You know what this is for uwu]
Was Bailey surprised Melody was so mad about Richard leaving? No, unfortunately. She had always been such a manipulative piece of work to Bailey, but he had been good and kept his beak shut. He knew if he said a word, they'd do anything in their power to keep him and Richard apart. Now though, Richard was leaving, finally getting the freedom he deserved...but Melody wanted to have the last word.
Bailey stared at her, unimpressed and uncaring when she claimed this was 'all his fault'. Bailey had been called worse, he could easily let this slide. However, the second his mother was brought into it, everything changed. Eyes briefly widened, before eyebrows furrowed and hackles began to bristle. An anger Bailey never felt before began to burn, feathers raising in response, as protective cluck like noises rumbled in his throat. He can take an insult, but bring his mum into it? All bets were off. The second Melody called his mother fake, and brought up her drinking, Bailey snapped.
Palm collided with her cheek, hard enough for an audible 'smack' noise to be heard, and for two of his nails to break completely. No tears were in his eyes, body trembling as anger fuelled him,
"Don't you EVER let a word about my mother come out of your cheap lipstick beak you fucking bitch!" Bailey crowed, the volume making his throat ache, "What the fuck do you even know about my mum?! Cause you know what I know! I know that she saw beauty and love in everything, including slimy, terrible, insignificant monsters like you!"
It's then Richard got in between them, Bailey shrinking down as hackled flattened as he tried to get himself to calm. His palm tingled from when he had hit her...holy fuck he hit someone, yet, he didn't regret it. It had been a long time coming. While Richard and her argued, Bailey shoved a hand into his pocket, fishing out his wallet. He tugged out the first clump of money he could get. When he had calmed himself to be a little less violent, Bailey stood fully. She had her back to him, and people called him a tantrum throwing child. Walking around Richard, Bailey moved until he was back in front of her - he was NOT done,
"You know, Misses Evans, for someone that only cares about money, you sure are shit at handling it."
He shoves the few bills he had tugged out against her chest, soon letting it fall to the floor,
"Thirty dollars, enjoy it, 'cause it's the last cent you're gettin' outta any Adler," Bailey warns her, "You might wanna go buy some nice lipstick, you're gonna need to kiss Mister Evans ass a lot to apologise, after my dad finds out what you said. Consider the contracts you had been yourselves void..."
He should leave it here but...damn does Bailey wanna twist the knife. He had made his point but...well, he already dug the grave this deep,
"I hope you're happy with yourself," Bailey says, coldness to his voice, "One of your son grows wings, your other finally gets to be free, and you decide to attack some kid because your head is that far up your fuckin' ass you can't look in the mirror an' realise you're the one that pushed Richy away," He knows he won't get through to her, "Enjoy your house, enjoy rotting and withering away...because soon you'll be an old, bitter, lonely women, who's kid and grandkids won't visit, because of how fucked in the head you are, and how you messed with his, and as you lay on your death bed, taking your final breath, I hope you remember this...I hope you remember it and regret it, and realise how, no, this is all your fuckin' fault, maybe if you weren't such a bitch things could be better, but sadly, you decided money mattered more than your son," Bailey turns it around on her, "I'd say see you in Hell, but you'd probably be too busy giving tours."
Okay, yeah, Bailey should shut up now. Pushing passed her, Bailey heads over to the last few boxes so he can put the rest inside the truck, and they could escape. Bailey hadn't just burned the bridges, he had eradicated him, and damn did he feel good about it.
|Muse interaction
It was like a flash of motion but she could hear the sound even before the sting had set in against her cheek. A 'smack' from the palm of Bailey's hand colliding in against Melody's face. Melody's head moved with the force and the two of them were just standing there. Melody was shocked eyes were wide as she reached up to her cheek and felt it over as if to see if that had actually happened. Bailey on the other hand was shaking, from anger as they were more ready to respond. "Don't you EVER let a word about my mother come out of your cheap lipstick beak you fucking bitch!"
It was then Richard was moving making his way over to the pair of them. Melody expected her son to speak up and say something. Clearly, he would turn to Bailey and grow upset about them hitting her.
"What the fuck do you even know about my mum?! Cause you know what I know! I know that she saw beauty and love in everything, including slimy, terrible, insignificant monsters like you!"
By now Richard had moved to stand between them, Melody left to stand there already being yelled at by that fuck spoiled Alder brat and now Richard was standing up for both him and thier mother? What was going on here? She was HIS mother and this is how he was going to not only let her be treated but also treat her in turn? Turning to face Richard to look down on..odd she never noticed how tall he was before now she had to look up at both of them. The shock on her face only spread out further
"You know, Misses Evans, for someone that only cares about money, you sure are shit at handling it."
Attention shifted looking back to Bailey now who seemed to have moved around Richard facing her once more. Brow scrunched up at his remark. She went to open her beak to speak up these damn children have not given her a single chance to say anything when she forcibly had shoved something her way, a slight step back wanting to avoid another slap if that was coming her way before she glanced down to see the bills laying scattered across the driveway. She just bite back against her teeth as she looked to the clump of bills. Was he throwing money at her now?
"Thirty dollars, enjoy it, 'cause it's the last cent you're gettin' outta any Adler," It was only with that did she kind of understood what had just happened.
"You might wanna go buy some nice lipstick, you're gonna need to kiss Mister Evans ass a lot to apologise, after my dad finds out what you said. Consider the contracts you had been yourselves void..."
oh..oh no.
Sure did she think Bailey held any authority to make that statement not yet likely but with how the two parents always were with the rooster?
"I hope you're happy with yourself," Bailey says, coldness to his voice, "One of your son grows wings, your other finally gets to be free, and you decide to attack some kid because your head is that far up your fuckin' ass you can't look in the mirror an' realise you're the one that pushed Richy away," He knows he won't get through to her, "Enjoy your house, enjoy rotting and withering away...because soon you'll be an old, bitter, lonely women, who's kid and grandkids won't visit, because of how fucked in the head you are, and how you messed with his, and as you lay on your death bed, taking your final breath, I hope you remember this...I hope you remember it and regret it, and realise how, no, this is all your fuckin' fault, maybe if you weren't such a bitch things could be better, but sadly, you decided money mattered more than your son," Bailey turns it around on her, "I'd say see you in Hell, but you'd probably be too busy giving tours."
Melody felt as he brushed past her, speechless but not for any good reason. What he said sure she heard it but was giving the impact one would think. If anything it was more showing her where she messed up. Thomas was sure to be pissed hearing about how she just lost them those contracts through Benedict. But, at the same time she didn’t care they had many others the Alder one may be a loss but that fuck little, turning around to face them now. “Don’t go and throw your money at me you fucking f-“ Once more Richard was in between them she hadn’t even notice her son move around.
“I meant it you not say one more thing against him.” He butted in with.
“I can’t believe you! You ungrateful child! Letting that” she bit her younger, she wasn’t going t let them see her loss face here and resulting to insults she wasn’t a child herself after al she had dignity to up hold. “That spoiled rotten so called partner of yours” she would never call them Richard’s boy friend she found it ridiculous in the first place. “Speak to me your mother by the way as they have much less hit me like that?! Yet you’re going to stand there and act as if I’m in the wrong I am the victim here as he throws his wealth his farther wealth in our faces.” As if anything Bailey had done just now toward her Al’s was towards Richard, how couldn’t she was still his mother after all.
Her eyes moved to look to Richard now. Who was watching the rooster, a soft expression on his face? Worry? over them soon he went to look her way at it chanced as soon as those eyes, were on her lacking any of that worry her way. She couldn’t believe this! He was going to side with them over her?! “You are a mockery to you damn family name Richard,” She went on to cut in with.
"I kind of wish I could be here to see you try and make this up with dad, but I'm done." That was all Richard said to her. Moving to take some of the boxes from Bailey. She watched as her son ushered the rooster over to the moving truck. Placing himself between them clearly it wasn't to protect her from them. But them from her. She balled up her hand and grinded her teeth. Quick to turn on her heels as she stormed up to her front door, needing to get to the landline inside. Pausing to look over her shoulder. "Go ahead go through with this but after today Richard? that's it. You set a talon in that truck with him. And that is it you will never be welcomed back here again!" She shouted out waiting for her son to fold and listen. He didn’t, didn’t even look at her, She growled up her breath and stopped her foot. “That it I mean it! I never want to see your disrespectful face again Richard! Any claim to anything you had in this family is gone now! I didn’t just lose one I lost both my sons” aiming for some pity still one last bit to try and get Richard to see the error he was making, how could he be so cruel to his mother after sh thought.
——————-
Was Richard surprised Melody spoke like that? No. Did he hate what she did about Opal? Of course. No Richard was far more surprised by Bailey as he went and set the last of the boxes inside everything was gone and set away now. Reaching up to pull the door closed as he jump back so it would shut fast and quick. He snuck one last look at his house to watch Melody walk away, he heard her when she last spoke but...it didn't affect him the way she may think. When he was younger he would fall in line sure but that was before what happened to his brother. "Goodbye," he whispers under his breath. He wasn't sad or even mad he didn't feel anything close to remorse. Richard didn't know how to place these emotions in him. He did feel free though, "Let's go," he simply said to Bailey grabbing thier hand to look at the fingers with the missing nails, he shouldn't but a slight smile crossed his beak for a second. Richard didn't know how to explain it he knew it was for Opal but the things Bailey said. There was a bit for him there too, it was weird he was leaving this house finally he was free from everything he been keeping to himself. Bailey he picked Bailey and that burned any last string she hand on Richard to tug and pull on him to do as she wanted
——————
A night at a motel and they were back on the road, half way to new things. Richard thought as he held his hand out t Bailey, another on the passages door. “Doesn’t seem right to stick you to driving the whole way.” He said as he went to offer to help them up to the seat taking a moment to look at Bailey had look over the missing nails. He was going to say sorry…anymore at least he spent a lot of the trip yesterday doing that and even again last night. He wasn’t feeling as guilty as before he opted to leave that a something t deal with later. Instead as he turned bailey’s hand around in his own he couldn’t help the laugh that came out of his beak recalling her face the sound even. His laugh kind of grew how she could do nothing but yell and make empty threats. “Sorry I know I shouldn’t be laughing but man you smacked her so fucking hard your nails popped right off, I’m surprised they didn’t get stuck in her face or scratch her even. You swore someone did worse then slap her” okay was it wrong he found some humor in it? Maybe. But not everyone dealt with a parent or parents like Richard did so in part? He could help but enjoy it. Enjoy watching someone give her what he felt she had coming and to put her in her place. Holding Baily’s hand firmly in his own as he laughed more “Why did you go and throw the money at her you dork. I take it back I think that expression was the best one the way you slammed into to her chest I wonder if she took it or if still sitting there.” He couldn’t explain why he was laughing so hard right now or why tears pickled at his eyes.
Emotions were a whirlwind fr the eagle they weren’t in St. Canard just yet. Yet, Richard felt free already. No longer under their roof they weren’t going to be able to make use of their doll and have him play the part they set up for him. He had been to catch up in what his mother said about Opal..he knew what Bailey said but he wasn’t at that point yet. Reaching up with his free hand to push up his glasses to wipe the tear from his eyes. Laughter and tears just coming nonstop he couldn’t explain it the odd sensation “Cheap lipstick beak though?” He soon question needing to pull his glass off by the arm as he gave a better wipe at his eyes just looking at his idiot. “You’re a dork you know that?” Settled down once getting that cry and laugh out he leaned in to rest his forehead against Bailey’s own. It just felt good to let so much of that out, a slightly chuckle escaping him still. “I didn’t think anyone would talk to her like that, I’m still impressed by that slap I was on the end of the drive way, out side and could still hear it.” Richard said to Bailey, pulling back enough to place his glasses back over his face. Lifting up Bailey’s hand for a better look.
“I feel you have earned some spoiling and having your nails redone. Which I am paying for.” Richard claimed he wasn’t gonna take a no, seeing how Bailey did break those nails slapping Melody across her face. So Richard wanted to reward them a bit for it. Bailey did however float the idea of Richard getting his nails done with them though. “Hmm fine if it means you won’t fight me on paying on it. Come on lets..lets go home.”
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cherrycocaineee · 3 years
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18. Sodapop - A Love All Too Real
*Warning - Smut; spanking, biting, dirty talk, hair pulling, car sex*
“My baby did so well.”
“Cum one more time for me, I know you’ve got it in you.”
“I know, baby, I know. I’m right here, just breathe.”
*Sodapop’s p.o.v*
   Mickey Mouse was playing loudly throughout the living room, trying to muffle the sounds of the rain beating against the roof. It worked a little, distracting all of us from the brewing storm outside. Two-Bit was sitting next between Steve and I, completely mesmerized by his favorite showing playing on the screen. It wasn’t getting late but most of us were ready to pass out in the spots we sat in; me including, my heavy eyelids sinking each time I blinked. However, we were shaken away when there was a rapid banging noise on the door. I pushed myself up off the cushion and peered towards the closed door like all the others, wondering who could possibly be standing outside in this weather. The knocking came again, except this time with a voice behind it.
  “Seriously guys! Who else would be knocking at your damn door right now?!”
  It was Anni.
   Ponyboy hopped off the floor, leaving Johnny sitting there alone, and opened the front door quickly. Anni was standing there, her hand over her left eye, soaking wet from the rain fall. She glared at him.
  “Took you long enough,” she grumbled.
 “Sorry Anni,” he said, “we expected you to be at home.”
  “I was at home. I got kicked out.”
  When she stepped into the house, the multiple bruises on her skin, fresh blood was collected on her skin and clothes, and when she removed her hand from her eye you could see how bad it really was. Her eye was black and purple, and I could see that some of the blood vessels in her eye were popped due to the red color collecting in her eye.
  “Holy shit,” Two-Bit muttered, his eyes staying off the television now.
 No one cared about Mickey Mouse playing anymore, or how tired they were. We only cared about Anni.
She placed her bag down by the door as she passed Ponyboy, who was still in shock that he couldn’t even move to close the door. Steve did it for him, not wanting rain to get inside the house or on him.
  “Anni,” Darry said, standing in front of her, “this is the third time this week.”
  She looked at all of us before turning back to Darry, the unfazed look on her face never wavering, as she shrugged.
  “So?” She muttered.
 “So,” he continued, “you can’t keep livin’ like this.”
  Anni waved her hand in front of her, rather annoyed that she had to hear this again. Anytime she came over covered in bruises, Darry or one of us would tell her she couldn’t live with her dad again. It was always met with the same unfazed look on her face along with a light shrug of the shoulders. Anni crossed her arm over her chest; I noticed that she didn’t even wince. She was so use to the constant abuse and beatings that they didn’t even hurt her physically anymore.
   “Why not?” She asked, tilting her head to the side.
 “Anni, you do realize that your eyeball is red right? Like the blood vessels in your eye have busted?” Dally inquired, taking a long drag from his cigarette.
 “Well yeah, I’m going to clean myself up and wait for it to heal like always.”
   “But what we’re sayin’,” I said, standing from my spot, “you don’t deserve to be beaten every time you go home. You deserved to be cared for and go to sleep safely.”
  Once more, I noticed that the unfazed look in her eyes never wavered. She was so numbed to the abuse it didn’t seem wrong anymore. Instead, she turned away from all of us, facing the open bathroom ready to head inside so she could avoid the problem.
  “Doesn’t matter to me. Lots of things shouldn’t happen but they do. People take what they want from me whenever they please; the want sex, they don’t have to ask they just take, if every night someone wants to beat the hell out of me so that they feel better then so be it. I’m nothing more than a toy; a disposable piece of shit that people tend to keep around until they’re done using me.”
  With those final words, she walked into the bathroom and closed the door behind her. My heart broke into hundreds of pieces after hearing her say those words. Anni wasn’t a bad person, she just never knew what it felt like to be loved and cherished. All I wanted to do was love and cherish her. To lay beside her at night and hold her. To pepper her face with dozens of kisses while caressing her small form. To just show her what it felt to be cared about instead of used. But she was so brainwashed into thinking she didn’t matter, that she was nothing more than a throwaway doll, that she couldn’t see it.
  Ponyboy wrapped his arms around him.
 “We can’t keep lettin’ her live there, Darry,” he said.
 “I know that, Pony, but unless she wants to leave there isn’t anythin’ we can do,” Darry said, “I’m goin’ to go make her somethin’ to eat.”
  That was a normal routine when Anni came over all beaten up. She normally wouldn’t have eaten for two days before the beating. I had asked her why she didn’t eat two days in advance and she told me that it helped her not throw up when her dad kicked her in the stomach. Once more breaking my heart as I heard her tell me that she could anticipate when the beating was coming and how to make it hurt less.
 I followed Darry into the kitchen, Steve and Ponyboy trailing behind me. He was already getting all of the sandwich stuff out, dinner having been served a while ago and with all of us here, there were no leftovers. I grabbed the mustard off the table and watched Pony take out some bread before spreading the yellow condiment on her sandwich. We worked in silence, not sure what we could say to one another. Darry was right; unless Anni wanted to leave her parents, to have a better life, there wasn’t much we could do.
   As soon as we finished making her sandwich, and Steve added half a pickle to the plate, Anni came walking in while drying her hair with the towel. She was wrapped in nothing but a towel. In the kitchen light I could see her bruises more prominent.
  “Soda, can I borrow some clothes?” She inquired.
 “Sure thing, doll,” I said, rinsing my hands off and following her to my room.
   I opened the drawer and took out a pair of gray sweatpants and a black wife beater that revealed a lot on the side. It was something I wore around the house when it was hot.
  “You know, Pony has clothes that might fit you better,” I joked.
 “Yeah, probably,” she laughed, “but they aren’t as comfortable as yours.”
  I handed the clothes to her, looking at her beaten up face. I frowned.
 “Does it hurt?” I whispered.
 “No more than it normally does,” she shrugged, “can you close the door on your way out? Please, and thank you.”
  Nodding my head, I left the room and closed the door behind me. Anni came out five minutes after wearing the sweats and wife beater I’d given her. It was much bigger on her than I’d expected, revealing all of her sides and if she moved her arms a certain way you could see the side of her breast. She wasn’t wearing a bra, not that she needed one because her breasts were small and perky.
  A lump formed in my throat as I watched her. I had to force myself to look away. She plopped down on the recliner, throwing her legs over the arm of the chair as Darry walked in with her sandwich. He handed it to her and smiled.
 “Eat up, kid,” he said.
 “Thank you,” she said, smiling back.
Soon the rain went away; Darry had gone to sleep an hour ago, having to get up for work in the morning. Pony had fallen asleep on the floor beside Johnny, Dally left with Two-Bit to a party that was close by, and Steve was sprawled out beside me completely knocked out. His mouth was partially opened which made me laugh a little.
  Anni was still awake. She walked over to me, her arms folded over her chest.
  “Want to come outside with me?” She asked, “I need to smoke.”
 “Sure, come on,” I said, standing up carefully not to wake Steve or the others.
  I closed the door behind us and she shivered. The rain had made the air incredibly cold, and she was hardly wearing anything. Her pale skin glowed in the darkness, and in the small, illuminating porch light, I noticed that her nipples were erected.
 “Come on,” I said, leading her to Darry’s truck.
  We climbed into the backseat. I reached to the front and grabbed the spare keys underneath the visors. I turned the truck on and let the heater kick in so we could warm up. Anni was digging through her bag, removing a lighter and a container out. I watched her open the container and take out a joint. Anni didn’t smoke cigarettes, couldn’t stand the taste, but she did smoke weed and I was pretty sure it was because it numbed her from everything. I watched her light her joint and hit it, a cloud of smoke releasing from her perfect, soft, pink lips. The smell of weed collecting in the car and I knew I was going to have to air it out before we went in. Darry had the nose of a hound.
  She looked over at me and held out the joint, “want some?”
  “No thanks, doll,” I smiled.
  Shrugging her shoulders, she continued to smoke the joint. Her unwounded eye turned hazy and became a bit red. With each puff, she was getting higher and higher; this obviously not being the first time she smoked tonight. She slouched down in her seat, the shirt riding up a little bit. I guess I’d been staring too long because she faced me and raised her eyebrow.
  “Why do you keep staring at me like that?” She questioned.
 “Just takin’ in all of your wounds,” I whispered, half lying.
  She let her eyes land on the bruises decorating her arm before dropping it and taking another hit of her joint.
  “You know, I’m use to it but they still hurt like hell.”
  “You shouldn’t be use to it,” I muttered, “I hate seein’ you like this, Anni.”
  Anni put out her smoke, putting it back in her purse and folding her arms, “why?”
  “Because I care about you. Every time I see you all bruised up like this, it pisses me off. I swear if I ever see your dad-”
  “You’ll do nothing.”
  Our eyes met; hers cold, and distant, mine shocked, and sad.
  “If you do something it’ll only make it worse. I’ll just get beaten ten times worse than the last. He’ll do everything in his power to prove he’s got total control over me, and he’s right.”
  I reached over and touched her shoulder. She flinched a bit but I didn’t pull away; her skin was cool to the touch, the heater barely keeping her warm. Anni sighed.
 “It’s just how it is, Soda. Leave it be.”
  “How can I do that?” I asked, “you don’t deserve it.”
 “Because I’m not important, Soda!” She snapped, “if I left today, all of you would stop thinking about me! If I died tomorrow, you’d forget me as soon as you saw the next girl walk by! I’m replaceable! A nobody! Unloved!”
 “You aren’t unloved!” I yelled back, “and maybe to your shitty dad you're replaceable, but to me you’re irreplaceable! You’re so fucked up in the head, you don’t even know what love is because they’ve got you all messed up.”
  “So?! What do you want me to do about it!”
 “Let me show you what it’s like to be loved, Anni.”
  She started nibbling on her lip as I got closer to her. She didn’t move away from me though, as I leaned in closer and closer. The air between us almost felt thin, I could hardly breathe. I could see her chest moving up and down fast. Was she nervous? Scared? I couldn’t tell. My forehead pressed against hers.
  “I’ll stop if you want,” I whispered, “I’d never do somethin’ to you that you aren’t comfortable with.”
  It took her a moment to answer and when she was capable of doing so, it came out as more of a hushed whisper.
 “I’m fine,” her voice croaked, “you can continue.”
She was definitely nervous. My words, along with my actions, had her flustered and confused.
Nodding my head, I pressed my lips against hers. Her lips were just as soft as I’d imagined them to be. When I pulled away, it was only for a second, going back into and kissing her deeply once again, this time more passionately. I softly pushed her back, keeping my lips on hers, and crawled between her legs. Her hands reached up and wrapped around my neck, her fingers tangling themselves into my hair. A soft groan left my lips as I felt her fingers tug gently.
   I pulled away from her, a small amount of saliva pulling from our lips. Her eyes were hazy with lust and confusion.
  “I’ve got you, doll,” I whispered, “I promise.”
  She nodded her head. Leaning back down, I attached my lips to her neck and started leaving wet, open mouthed kisses along the nape. Softly sucking and nibbling on her flesh, I felt my cock harden at the sound of her breathy moans. A sound that I wanted to be familiar with forever. I bit down on her neck and she gasped, jolting forward, her chest pressing against mine. Her nipples were still hard. I swirled my tongue around the spot I bit down on before biting down on a different spot, repeating the process.
  “Soda,” she whimpered.
  It was the first time I’ve heard her sound so vulnerable.
  “That’s a good girl,” I praised, returning my attention to her face.
  The black eye didn’t bother me, neither did the blood in her eye. She was as beautiful as she always was.
  I grabbed the rim of my shirt and pulled it off, revealing my tanned chest. Her eyes lingered a little lower, her teeth biting her bottom lip while she scanned over my body. I chuckled then reached for her shirt. She lifted her arms letting me pull the shirt over her head, revealing her exposed, bruised flesh. I groaned at the mere sight of her breasts. They were perfect; like beautiful clouds. I barely licked one of the hardened nipples and her back arched, eyes rolling to the back of her head. I captured her lips with mine once again, this time kissing her hungrily.
  I pulled her off the seat and into my lap, breathing heavily as I started kissing down her neck again, tracing the purple hickeys I had left. My hands fumbled with my zipper first, my cock aching to be released from their restraints. Not bothering to lift her off of me, I lifted myself off the seat a bit and pulled my jeans down. Anni wrapped her arms around me, tugging my hair a bit as she kissed me hard. I grabbed the sweats she was wearing and dragged them down, my hands grazing her bare skin causing her to shiver. I loved watching her shiver after I touched her. It didn’t happen often with Anni, she hardly ever reacted to anyone touching her, so to see, to feel, her shake from my touch sent a rush of pride through me.
  Anni lifted herself off of my lap as I pulled her sweats all the way off. She was completely naked in front of me now.
  “God damnit, Anni,” I groaned, “so fucking beautiful.”
 A soft laugh left her lips as she watched me pull my boxers down finally releasing my growing member. There was no need to wait any longer, no need for foreplay, no need for me to poke and prod to make sure she was okay. We were both ready as if we'd been waiting for years. I lined myself up with her and pushed her down onto me, groaning at the feeling of her tight walls gripping me. Anni buried her head into my shoulder and moaned softly at the feeling of me filling her up. Only a second passed before I started thrusting my hips back and forth, our skin slapping against each other’s. Small pants were leaving her mouth as she gripped my shoulders tightly, keeping herself upright despite being drilled into. Even though I wasn’t going too fast right now, the position allowed me to bury myself deep into her sweet little cunt.
   “Holy fuck,” I moaned, “that’s it baby.”
  My pace quickened as she started bouncing herself up and down; the truck started to rock a bit at the movement happening inside but we didn’t care. Anni’s moans became more erotic and lewd; she sounded almost angelic and I loved that I was the one making her feel this way. Her head fell back as she continued to ride my cock, meeting each thrust coming from me. I moved my left hand up to the back of her head and pulled her hair a little, just enough to get her to face me. I didn’t want to hurt her. She moaned at the feeling of me pulling her hair.
  “Fuck, Anni, you sound so beautiful,” I groaned, pulling her closer by her hair so that our foreheads could meet, “such a beautiful girl for me, huh?”
  She could only nod, her body shivering.
  “Soda, I’m close,” she whimpered out.
  “Let it go, baby,” I moaned, “I’ve got you.”
 Those words with the quickening pace of our thrust sent Anni into euphoria. She screamed out, her legs violently shaking as she came all over my cock. I held her in place; one hand gripping her side while the other stayed tangled in her hair. I removed my hand from her back and smacked her perfectly, plump, sweaty ass. She yelped, rocking her hips into mine causing me to groan. Giving her ass a few more smacks, enough to pleasure her, I turned us over so that I was on top of her. My eyes danced across her sweaty body. I started pouring kisses onto her face and mumbling soft “I love you’s” as I continued to thrust into her faster.
  “Soda,” she moaned, “I can’t.”
  “Shh,” I whispered, holding back a string of curse words, feeling her walls tighten around me, “you can do it baby. Come on.”
   I slammed into her repeatedly; removing my cock all the way at the tip and then slamming back into her. Her eyes rolled back as her hips arched. I could feel myself getting closer to my climax as I watched her, feeling her dripping cunt swallow me over and over again.
  “Cum one more time for me,” I cooed, “I know you’ve got it in you.”
 Anni couldn’t form any more words, all she could do was nod her head and let me coax her with my sweet words. Soon her body spasmed again and her legs shook harshly. Her screams rippled through the air, but I didn’t bother covering her mouth to hide them. I didn’t care if people heard and I didn’t care if that caused people to come over to see what was happening; all I wanted was to be focused on Anni.
  “Fuck, baby, I’m gonna cum,” I croaked.
  My thrust becoming sloppier, I watched her body go limp as pools of sweat collected on her chest. I thrusted into her three more times before spilling my cum into her fleshy, pink walls. Coating every inch.
  “Fuck!” I yelled, “oh my God, fuck!”
  I stopped moving, unable to ride out my high for too long. Anni was panting hard. I pulled myself out of her and brought her to my chest. Rubbing soft circles onto her bruised back as she gasped for air.
  “I know, baby, I know. I’m right here, just breathe.”
   When Anni finally did catch her breath, she rested her head against my bare, sweaty chest. A tired smile appeared on my face as I watched her look up at me.
  “My baby did so well,” I praised again.
  We stared into each other’s eyes for what felt like a lifetime. Her glistening skin glowed in the moonlight, the cool air chapping her dry lips making her lick them repeatedly, her breast heaving up and down as she took in large amounts of air. Her black hair was not sweaty and clinging to her beautiful face. I reached my hand down and stroked the bruise on her cheek.
  “I love you, Anni,” I whispered, “so fuckin’ much. You’ll never be replaceable to me. I only want you.”
  Anni chuckled and closed her eyes, she was definitely sleepy.
  “I’ll hold you to that, Soda. If you love me, maybe I can let myself love you too. It may take a while but I’ll do it for you.”
  Grabbing the blanket that Darry normally kept inside his truck, I draped it over us and sighed. She buried her head into my chest and let her heavy eyes close. The sound of my heart lulling her to sleep.
  “No matter how long it takes,” I said, “I’ll wait for you. I’ll help you love again because you deserve it. That and the world.”
   The sudden realization of Darry coming out in the morning to see us asleep, naked in his car with the lingering smell of sex, hit me. A low chuckle escaped from my lips. I knew I was gonna hear it in the morning, but right now, I didn’t care. It felt like it was just Anni and I, all alone. That’s what I wanted.
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quindolyn · 3 years
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General Relationship Headcanons || James Potter
Request: “Please can you do a general relationship for james potter? xx” -anon
Word Count: 5,835
Notes: This is kinda slow burn, I’m a little sorry. The ones I did for Remus and Sirius were not canon so this won’t be either which is a little easier because no Jily. These keep on getting longer and longer, but part of that is because Jamie is definitely my favorite marauder.
Warnings: Smut, angst, lots of fluff, dom and sub James, momma’s boy Jamie
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You were something special
James had known that since he was 4 years old
It just took him a long time to realize exactly how special you really were
James Potter was an idiot
That would become increasingly apparent to him as he grew up
Your family and the Potters were great friends for as long as any of you could remember, meaning that you and James were practically attached at the hip
And who could blame you? He has such nice hips 
The both of you are heart broken when he leaves for Hogwarts leaving you behind because you wouldn’t start until the following year.
All throughout his first year you guys write back and forth sharing every single detail of your respective days, down to the color of the plate you ate your lunch on
You can’t help but feel envious
There’s your best friend in the entire world, in fucking Scotland
Making new best friends
When the next year rolls around and you get to finally join James on the Hogwarts Express you want to hate Sirius and Remus
You really do
But how can you? They’re Remus and Sirius 
You guys spend the entirety of the train ride laughing and talking and the other two boys tell you embarrassing stories from the year prior about James
When they hear your nicknames for him (Jamsie, Jamie, J), they make fun of him relentlessly
He calls you an assortment of cheesy nicknames too but his favorites, before you guys get together, are “Sweetheart”, “Sunshine”, and “love”
If you get sorted into Gryffindor James screams his head off for you, making room for you to sit next to him at the table in the Great Hall, opposite Sirius and Remus.
If you’re in a different house then James gets sad, really sad, like that night he cries into his pillow and Sirius has to climb into bed with him to give him hugs and tell him that its okay even if the two of you are in different houses. That doesn’t have to affect your friendship if you don’t let it.
The next day James would find you before you got to the Great Hall and engulf you in a hug in the middle of the corridor, not caring that there were people streaming past the two of you in either direction. 
“We’re gonna be friends forever right (Y/N/N)?”
“I hope so Jamie.”
Even though you’re in different classes and potentially different houses you guys are around each other all of the time
You sit with him and the other boys at their place at the Gryffindor table
They sit with you in the library
And by the end of your first year you’re having sleepovers in their dorm
You sleep in James’ bed of course and Remus and Sirius do. Not. hesitate. To mock you relentlessly
“You and your girlfriend getting comfy over there Jamie?”
“Go to hell Siri, let me cuddle James in peace!” 
These jokes continue through your years at Hogwarts and you and James take them in jest
As you guys get older the physical affection you share never dwindles
After someone made a crude comment in the hallway about the two of you he talked to you making sure that you were okay with the arms he would throw over your shoulders, the arms wrapped around you waist, the kisses to your forehead before he left the Great Hall for class, holding you in his arms in the Gryffindor common room as the two of you drifted to sleep.
You assure him that its okay, that its not weird because you guys have been best friends since forever and that you love how affectionate you are with each other
You don’t start to realize you feelings for James until he starts pining after Lily, you don’t know what you have until its gone, right?
Watching him stare at her in the Great Hall
Writing her little notes that even though he’ll go up and ask her out in front of everyone, which you’re not too fond of either, he’s too shy to actually give her
Listening to him go on and on about her, her hair, the cadence of her voice, the beautiful color of her eyes, how intelligent she is, and on and on
Sirius picks up on this instantly
And he does not hesitate to make fun of you for it all the time, obviously not enough for James to pick up on it because he’s a prick not a complete asshole, but still enough to make you blush uncontrollably
You can’t say anything to him though because he’s your James and there’s absolutely no way that he returns your feelings, you’re like a little sister to him
So, much to Sirius’ chagrin, you swallow your feelings and sit there by James, trying to listen to Remus as he tries to explain to you your Charms homework while James watches Lily on the other side of the Common Room laughing with Dorcas and Marlene
And a little piece of your soul dies
The summer between your third and fourth year, his fourth and fifth, you were excited to finally have your Jamsie back to yourself again.
It went without saying that the two of you would alternate between each other’s houses over the summer
There would be no Lily Evans to distract him
No exams to stress over 
Just you and James at the Potter estate, exploring the woods that, in all honesty, didn’t change all that much from summer to summer, and swimming in the bioluminescent pond on the edge of the Potter property, simply floating next to each other on your backs, one of his hands grasping your forearm, making sure you didn’t float too far away from him
But apparently this year it didn’t go without saying.
Instead, a mere month before the end of the term, James regretfully tells you that he and his family are going to Spain for the summer to be with his aunt who lives there and he really wants to take you but its the entire summer and his parents nixed it
“I’m so sorry sunshine, I really want to take you but-”
“It’s okay Jamie, I get it if you could you’d take me, but you can’t so its fine. I’m not going to hold it against you.”
And you can tell that he’s genuinely upset about it but that doesn’t mean that it doesn’t hurt any less when you hug him goodbye at King’s Cross knowing that unlike years prior you weren’t going to see him in a few days.
You spend a good chunk of the summer wallowing, not necessarily because your crush isn’t there with you but because your best friend isn’t
James writes you every day just like he did during his first year at Hogwarts but its not the same because you can’t see him
You can’t hold onto his arm when you’re tired and set your head on his shoulder
So when September 1st rolls around and you finally get to see him again you’re down right giddy
But on Platform 9 ¾ you’re looking for a wiry, lanky boy, with a nose a little too big for his face, and a squeaky little voice
Not the 6 foot man who approaches you, with broad shoulders and budding facial hair along his jawline.
“Sunshine!”
Oh holy shit
His voice
He no longer sounds like a dog toy, a very cute dog toy but still
You must admit that you’re a fan of the change, as the word leaves his lips you imagine resting your head on his chest and feeling the vibrations as he spoke with whomever
Its not a single day that you’re back at Hogwarts before James is fawning all over Lily again and you’ve had enough of it
You’re not going to let yourself to keep on pining after a boy who doesn’t love you
Not even doesn’t love you
But loves someone else
Sirius finds you a couple weeks into the school year, sitting with your back against a wall in an empty corridor trying to hold in your tears.
“What’s wrong, love?”
“I-I can’t believe I let myself fall for him. I’m an idiot Si!”
Sirius holds you in that hallway, rocking you back and forth while he murmurs to you that James is the idiot, not you, and that you deserve so much more than him
He helps you concoct a plan to get over James, he pitches to you going out on a date with someone else
Doesn’t have to be anything all that serious, just something to get your mind off James and remind you how hot you are, and how many people are lining up for you to give them so much as a moment of your time.
It doesn’t take too much on Sirius’ part to get you to agree to let him set you up
His name was Sullivan, he was in your year, a year younger than Sirius, with sandy blonde hair and chocolate brown eyes 
Sully, as he insisted you call him, took you for a butter beer at the Three Broomsticks
You had a good time, Sully was smart, and attractive, and you and he shared similar interests 
And all though he was lovely, and he insisted you were too, the both of you agreed that you would be better off as friends
You spent more time with him in the following weeks and less with James, Sirius, and Remus
The latter two were very happy that you were trying to move on because watching you stare at James was a little sad
James is confused, and hurt, and jealous
Though he adamantly refuses to admit that last one
Instead he just watches you. All. Of. The. Time.
To the point where if it wasn’t James it would be disturbing
And even though it is him it gets touch concerning
Sometimes before you go and sit with the Marauders at their spot in the Great Hall you’ll stop by where Sullivan sits with his friends and give him a smile, talk for a few minutes before hugging each other and walking away
It made James’ blood boil
Who did this kid think he was, you were his best friend he didn’t get to just waltz in and take you, or Godric forbid date you
One day you’re sitting outside with the boys when you see Sullivan on the other side of the court yard, excusing yourself you walk up to him and chat for a couple minutes before Sullivan’s face goes pale and there’s a shadow looming over you.
James throws an arm around your shoulders, tugging you into his side while extending his hand to Sully
“Hi, I’m James, (Y/N/N)’s best friend.”
James is standing there with you guys maybe 2 minutes, being the most passive aggressive petty person he could possibly be, dropping not so subtle hints about his distaste for Sully before he’s tugging you back to the tree where Siri and Remmy still are, their hands resting dangerously close to each other’s 
“What the fuck James!”
He plays dumb because if there’s one thing James Potter is good at its being an idiot, but eventually he relents
“I just don’t like the way he looks at you, it's like he’s trying to get into your pants!”
You start cackling
Borderline manically
“You’ve got to be kidding me James we’re just friends!”
Sirius being the eternally helpful human being he was added in his two cents, “Maybe you’re projecting Potter!”
And the laughing stops
James goes beet red, you feel all the blood drain from your face before collecting yourself and murmuring a quick apology before racing off for the castle 
You and James don’t talk for 2 days
It's the longest either of you have gone without some form of communication
You’re both so embarrased and you don’t want to hear James tell you that he doesn’t actually like you and that it was just Sirius being an asshole
Of course he would say this to make you comfortable but that’s not what it would do
It would crush you
You don’t have classes together so it's easy to ignore him there, and if you’re in separate houses it's even easier
Meals
Now that’s a different story
You can’t just eat somewhere else and the prospect of facing James after what Sirius said has you running for the nearest toilet
So you scrounge up what you can in the kitchen after meals
It kills James that he’s only seen you on the other side of the courtyard or disappearing behind corridors 
You’re supposed to be his Sunshine, he can’t stand that you’re hiding from him, he misses you so much
And at first he’s a little angry when you don’t sit with them at meals, but after scanning the Great Hall, he realizes you’re not there
His stomach drops, have you not been eating?
So dinner the second night he collects a plate for you with all of your favorite things and determinedly sets off for your dorm, balancing a plate in one hand and a glass of pumpkin juice in the other
He has to knock on your door with his foot
“Jamie, what’re you doing here.”
He gently pushes past you letting himself into your room to set the plate and glass on your desk
“You haven’t been eating.”
And despite yourself your heart flutters, because he’s right you haven’t been eating as much as you should’ve not wanting to get caught in the kitchens you only swiped what you could easily get your hands on
But then you have to remember, it's because you’re basically his little sister, not because he reciprocates your feelings
“I’ve missed you Sunshine.”
And you lose it
“Stop! Stop it Jamie I can’t take it anymore, you can’t keep calling me Sunshine and Sweetheart and Love and cuddle with me on the couch and then turn around and declare your undying love for Lily fucking Evans. I can’t do it anymore! I like you, differently than you like me and I can’t do this anymore!”
Poor Jamsie has never felt like more of an absolute asshole
You’d be lying if you said you didn’t revel just a little bit in the look on his face, didn’t feel a little triumph that maybe he felt even a fraction as bad as you did.
He’s an idiot and he realizes it
You’re both very quiet for a minute before he walks up to you so that you’re a mere inch from him before he gulps and leans down to press his lips to yours
“I’m an idiot.”
“Yes you are.”
“But I’m your idiot, right?”
“Always Jamsie.”
It's not as though much changes between the two of you on the surface once you’re together
You’re a bit more touchy feely with each other, kisses usually pressed to foreheads or temples often find themselves brushing at the other’s lips
He holds your hand a lot more freely now and more often than not it will end up clasping your thigh under the table in the Great Hall, or after having pushed your chairs together in the library so they touched
When you curl up together in the Gryffindor common room his hands find their way under your shirt, lightly tracing the skin of your stomach, pressing kisses to the junction where your neck meets your shoulder
His arsenal of nicknames expands impressively
Angel, darling, beautiful, gorgeous, poppet, pretty girl, mine
And he’ll add the occasional my before the word “love”
You already slept over in their dorm room every other night before you and James got together but now it's more of a nightly occurrence
Especially the day before a Quidditch match, James insists that he sleeps with his lucky charm, says you keep him calm
You cheer the hardest for James at his matches, bar maybe Sirius
Even if you’re in a different house you sit with Siri and Remus in the Gryffindor stands and get all decked out in red and gold
Now that you’re his he has no problem with Sullivan, he trusts you and by extension he trusts the people you trust
You’re touched one day, early on into your relationship, when Lily comes up to you in the Great Hall and tells you that you didn’t have to tell James to tell her that he was sorry for being a prick and not taking no for an answer.
You don’t tell her this but you didn’t ask him to do anything
James is just a good person
He also has an abundance of money and little impulse control
He’ll buy you literally anything he sees that reminds him of you, or if he remembers you bringing up that you wanted or needed it
He likes buying you jewelry because you can wear it more often than you could say the same dress or blouse
That’s not to say that he doesn’t buy you clothes too, he has all of your sizes memorized and knows whether you wear normal/petite/tall
James Potter will buy you pads/tampons/whatever product you use
He’s a man not a little boy and he doesn’t give a flying fuck if someone makes fun of him for it
One day Lucius calls him out for it and Jamie is just not having it 
“You have no clue where the clit is or what to do with it do you Malfoy?”
He’s always helped you through your periods so now that you’re together he’s just more liberal with his touch because he knows how much you love it
He knows how to do basic hairstyles and such because he watched his mom when he was a little boy and watch your mom do your hair too
If your hair requires special treatments and hairstyles he will write to your mom, asking for her to teach you because he loves your hair and wants to be able to help you, like imagine sitting in his bed while he puts braids in your hair following the instructions your mom sent him
Speaking of families when he tells Euphemia you two are together (which he does as soon as he leaves your dorm that night) she literally screams
Fleamont was worried that she was being attacked
But the next day at breakfast you get a letter from Euphemia stained with dried tear drops as she poured her heart out to you, telling you how much she loved you and that if her son ever broke your heart you were to go to her immediately and she would deal with him for you 
The year you finally become boyfriend and girlfriend is the year you all become animaguses 
James tries to argue with you, insisting that you shouldn’t do it because it's dangerous and he doesn’t want you getting hurt
Your rebuttal is that isn’t it just as dangerous for him? And if you’re not doing it neither is he and that leaves Sirius which just wouldn’t end well 
He’s so proud of you when you transform for the first time, he gets so distracted watching you that he forgets where he is for a moment
That summer, unlike the one previous, you and James spend all of your time together 
You spend the entirety of the holiday at the Potter estate doing all the things that you and Jamie used to do when you were younger, only this time its better
Instead of being childhood friends you’re each other’s 
You can kiss him, and hold his hand, and he can lift up your hair to kiss the back of your neck
Euphemia lets you guys sleep in the same bed but before that she sits the two of you down and gives you the talk
“Now (Y/N), I don’t know if your parents have ever discussed this with you but if you two are going to be sharing a bed I think it's important we go over it.”
There’s so much blushing and whining from James
“Muuuummmm.”
One night you guys are lying on the floor of his bedroom wearing the absolute bare minimum because it was so hot and humid out when you pitched the idea of going skinny dipping
James is hesitant at first because he doesn’t want to make you uncomfortable
But you insist that you’re fine and point out to him that it was you idea not his
Being the gentleman he is when you strip by the lake he looks away making you laugh
When you turn him to look at you his jaw drops
You’re even more gorgeous than he could’ve ever imagined
It's dark out but the light from the lake allows you to drink in your figure
He blushes so much you’d think that he was the one naked
 When he does strip too he grabs you and jumps into the water, you guys are all over each other, running your hands up and down his chest, his hands are supporting your bum while your legs wrap around his waist
You have sex that night, for the first time, he was very gentle with you and holds your hand when he breaks you hymen and if you cry he kisses away your tears
“Do you wanna stop baby? Does it hurt too much? We can stop.”
James is one of two things depending on your preference
We have soft dom!James and sub!James
I personally appreciate a healthy mix of both 
Starting with soft dom!James, he would be so gentle with you 
Also very firm though, if you broke any of his rules he would not hesitate to punish you
He’s a thigh man through and through
Doesn’t matter if we’re talking dom or sub, the man lives for your thighs
Which makes his favorite form of punishment laying you across his lap to spank you, but most of the time his blows land on more of your thighs than they do your bum
He makes you count as he spanks you too and after every blow you have to thank him
“One! Thank you Daddy!”
And if you ever call him James instead of Daddy during sex he’ll stick his fingers in your mouth and make you choke on them, kissing away the tears that fall from your eyes, “S’okay baby, you’re okay. Can you do this for me? Can you take my fingers like the good girl I know you are?”
He loves taking you up against a wall, especially in the locker rooms after a Quidditch match
Shower sex is one of his favorites, thinks you look absolutely gorgeous, soaking wet and moaning for him, not to mention he get’s to fuck you up against the wall
This is the point in the headcanon where I urge you all to go read the blurbs by @randomoutsiders​ where Remus and Sirius teach James how to brat tame you, she captures his essence perfectly
He loves to blindfold you, he likes the little jump he gets out of you when he touches you
He gives you the most condescending mocking smiles
What comes to mind is the first time he makes you squirt, he’s so proud of both himself and you
“Good girl, look at that, look at how much of a mess you made for me angel. So pretty, good job.”
He then proceeds to lick the mess you just made off of you 
He loves buying you lingerie
He likes it in a deep red and black
Loves ripping it off of you, absolutely adores it 
After care with him would be so soft and sweet, he loves taking baths with you so he can clean you up and kiss all the places he left bruises while he murmurs to you about what a good girl you were and how proud he is of you
One night he tells you that if Godric forbid the two of you ever split up and you’re with someone else that after care is necessary and that you’re precious and deserved to be treated as such 
He treats you like a goddess 
Sub!James is just as precious
He’s also my current obsession so stick with me here
He’s just so eager to please, always wanting to make you feel good and not even caring all that much if he gets off himself
Just so centered around making you feel good
He calls you “Mommy” and I will not be accepting criticism
I feel like “Mistress” is too impersonal if that makes much sense
The former is just so intimate and James wears his heart out on his sleeve 
James is rarely if ever a brat, usually when he’s disappointed in himself and he takes it out on you and you have to remind him how to be a good boy
And the rest of the time when he breaks a rule it's completely on accident and he’ll come to you and tell you about it to apologize
He feels so guilty, like he’s failed you
Especially if he touches himself without your permission, it's almost enough to keep him from doing it but he’s still a horny teenaged boy and can’t help himself sometimes
Most of the time though you’ll end up with a horny James knocking on your dorm door begging you to help him 
He prefers giving you head than you giving him head
That’s not to say that the visual of you on your knees with his cock in your mouth isn’t appealing, it most certainly is 
He just loves that he can make you feel that good with just his tongue
James also loves how you taste, tells you it’s better than candy
Which makes you smile like an idiot
Will finger you under the table in the library if you ask him to, it's not like he was paying that much attention to his homework in the first place, and even if he had been you are without a doubt more important
Loves it when you ride him
Absolutely adores it, he loves the way your tits bounce which is why he prefers cowgirl to reverse cowgirl because he can keep his hands on your tits and on your thighs
He asks you for a cock ring, loves that you get to decide when he gets to cum 
Extra points if its a vibrating one
With his consent of course, you tie him up and make him watch while Sirius and Remus fuck the living day lights out of you, barely paying him any mind while you scream for the cocks of his two best friends 
He likes being tied up in general allowed to look and only look
The first time you peg him he almost cries it feels so good
And you take his sniffling as a sign he doesn’t like it and that he’s hurt, he has to explain to you that that is not it and “You make me feel so good Mommy.”
His whimpers and moans are the most precious things and he’s very vocal
Screaming your name and begging you to cum
He is not shy to beg you 
To cum
To make you cum
To get to so much as look at you
Baby boy has absolutely no shame 
I especially like sub!James because he’s such a cocky asshole 90% of the time but he’s also the kindest, most considerate soul and he spends so much of his life helping others that sometimes he just wants you to be in control
Regardless of sub or dom James you were making out on his couch that summer, your hands in his hair, his fumbling with the clasp on your bra when there was a pounding at his front door
He makes you stay where you are because he doesn’t want you to get hurt but its just Sirius
Well not just Sirius
He was bloodied and broken and looked like he’d been to hell and back
When he told the two of you what happened, how he’d been disowned and had nowhere else to go, while Euphemia tended to his wounds James engulfed him into the biggest hug and they just sit there, Sirius crying into James’ chest while James ran his hands up and down Sirius’ back whispering to him about how it was going to be alright that he was safe, that no one was ever going to hurt him again.
About 2 or so hours after you’d all retired for the night, you and James snuggled together in his bed you awoke when the door to his room creaked open
There was Sirius, with tears streaming down his face, his bottom lip wobbling
After untangling yourself from James you walked over to him, taking his hand in yours and leading him over to the bed
“James, scooch over.”
“Huh?”
“Scooch!”
When he opens his eyes and sees his Sirius standing there, bashfully ducking his head he quickly moves over and you and Sirius settle into the bed with him in the middle
You and James pet his hair hold his hands while you tell him how much the both of you love him and how you’re never going to let anything bad happen to him again
You fall asleep that night with James spooning Sirius from the back and you with your body curled into Sirius’s front, his head resting on your chest
When you go back to Hogwarts you often end up in this position in their dorm room only add Remus into the mix
You’re a year behind all of them at school meaning that when they graduate you’re still stuck their for a whole nother year without any of them
And it nearly kills all of you
You and James most, though you write to each other every day it's still not the same as him actually being there with you
When you get particularly desperate to see him he apparates to Hogsmeade where he becomes Prongs and meets you in the Forbidden Forest where you basically just spend the entire time holding each other and telling the other how much you love them
He cries at your graduation, full on blubbers 
“That’s my girl!”
Insists that you look better in your graduation cap than anyone else
Doesn’t relent when you tell him how ridiculous that is
You guys move in together as soon as you graduate, it’s barely even a discussion because you guys can always tell what the other is thinking
“Hey babe, do you wanna-”
“Yeah Jamie, when you wanna go look at apartments?”
He loves going shopping for your apartment, he has so much fun looking at color swatches and different fabrics
He insists that you guys decorate at least part of the apartment in Gryffindor colors
Wolfstar lives down the street from you guys and you have biweekly coffee dates together at a little coffee shop in between your two houses.
After a year or so you realise that you and James still aren’t married, and you get very self conscious
Does he not want to spend the rest of his life with you?
Does he not love you as much as you love him?
It completely eats you up
And James can tell that something’s up
When he asks you you confess your worries to him and his heart breaks
He never wanted to make you feel like he didn’t love you
Because of course he loved you
You were his everything, you were his Sunshine
After telling you all of this he goes rummaging through his drawers looking for something
That’s how you find him when you wake up to him accidentally dropping something results in a loud bang
“Jamie? Are you okay?”
When you find him he’s standing bashfully, blushing with his head down, his hands holding something behind his back
“James?”
And that’s when he gets down on one knee and pulls the small velvet box from behind his back
“This isn’t how I wanted to do it darling, but I spend every single day  thinking about you, you’re the first thing I think of in the morning and I fall asleep with you in my arms thinking about how much I love you and how I don’t know if I could live my life without you. I’m so sorry if I’ve ever made you feel differently, I can’t believe I was enough of an idiot to ever hurt you, in any way. Even though I most certainly don’t deserve you, would you do me the honor of making me the happiest man alive and marrying me?”
Euphemia plans your wedding with the help of Sirius
They go all out
There may or may not be a life size ice sculpture of you and James per Sirius' request
Married life is absolute bliss for the two of you
You wake up every morning with that ring on your bedside table (do people sleep in their engagement rings and wedding bands? I’m a child of divorce whose parents are both children of divorce, true love is a foreign concept) to remind you of the beautiful man beside you
Both sub and dom James go absolutely wild on your wedding night, he can’t believe your Mrs. Potter, that your his
Its that night that you pregnant
Though you don’t know it for almost 2 months 
James is the best husband 
He carries you everywhere, even when you’re not showing 
And he can because fuck that man is strong
He’ll carry you upstairs at night and down them in the morning and to the sofa 
You can only move by yourself when he’s not looking 
James is really good at puzzles and putting things together so it takes him less than 2 hours to put all the furniture together for the nursery 
Which he insists you paint yellow, the color of sunshine
One of the first things he buys is a little Gryffindor onesie for your baby
When he comes James has him in it all of the time
When you go into labor he’s very calm and collected
Euphemia is there to help the both of you because that’s the person he first called when you had your first contraction 
He holds your hand the entire time, kissing you, and coaching you along, telling you how good you’re doing, how proud he is of you
He cries when he first sees his son, he’s so beautiful 
Even though he’s basically the spitting image of James, Jamie swears that he looks so much like you
Once the doctors and nurses leave the room he climbs into bed beside you, throwing and arm over your shoulder as you cradle your little boy in your arms
“He’s beautiful Jamie.”
“Just like his mother.”
tagging: @randomoutsiders @weasleyposts​ @kittykylax
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Oooooo could I get the Brothers and the Undatables.... turned datable....reaction to MC crying after being stood up by a guy?
Obey me Boys + Dealing with an MC who has been stood up HCs
Lucifer
Knew you were going out, since you had to ask for permission to leave, and was surprised you were back so early.
He was confused when he found you crying and tries to get you to explain. Expecting the worst.
It’s not as bad as he imagined, thinking you’ve been physically hurt, but still not great. 
He also can’t stand such poor manners
Offers to have the man eviscerated for you. Which you laugh at thinking it’s a joke, but it’s really not
Goes to find this mystery man, once you’ve gone to bed, and have a stern conversation with him about manners....
Mammon
Against you going out in the first place. Why do you need to see some other guy?!?! You have the Great Mammon!
Goes to your room to see what was so great about this guy, only to find you crying when you tell him he stood you up
Livid. There are no other words for it.
First you ditch him to spend the afternoon with this jerk. Then his creep has the nerve to stand you up! Has he never met you!?
Threatens to go find him, but when you tell him no he sits back down.
Ponders on calling in some favors though. Being a gambling scumbag in his off time, does have a few less than scrupulous people who owe him some favors. They’d break his legs just for fun.
Levi
Being the Avatar of Envy, his base level when it comes to things is to be jealous of others. Especially when it comes to you.
Of course, he understands why you’d want to go out with a supposedly attractive normie, rather than stay in his otaku hidey hole with him. But it still stings. 
When you come back, all red faced and crying, he’s upset for you, but doesn’t know what to do.
Should he go defend your honor? Is hugging appropriate? Should have give you a special high five?
Let’s you come into the safe space of his otaku hidey hole and cry it out and lets you watch all the soft anime, or play as many hack & slash video games, you want until you feel better. 
Secretly happy that that guy stood you up so he can be your knight in shining armor, but feels bad about feeling good about it.
Satan
Notices something is wrong when you get back, but doesn’t say anything
He waits until you’re in private to ask. Not want to make a scene like his idiot older bothers.
When you tell him, near on the verge of tears, he gets so angry
Anger is something he is very used to, being the Avatar of Wrath. But this is the first time it’s been so focused and so venomous of a deep hatred. A rage he could do something with.
Tries to keep it under control and to himself, when you beg him not to do anything rash, but finds it hard.
Goes to some secret place to let his anger & magic out secretly and safety. Only for the fact that he doesn’t want to hurt you with it.
Asmo
Initially excited for you. He has dates all the time, but knows your each others favorites :3
When you come home so early, Asmo is confused what happened. Then even more confused that you’ve been stood up. He’s not familiar with the concept.
After you tell him what happened he’s shocked! Who could possibly stand you up?! His beautiful [Y/N]!
Would hug and console you, and tell you that he’s an idiot and ugly, and that there are plenty more fish in the sea.
Decides that that’s no reason to waste a good outfit, and takes you out clubbing to dance your sorrows away.
Find 100 other boys to tell you your pretty and make you feel good about yourself, because that jerk is not important
Beel
Disappointed you’re going out with someone else. But, he’s never said anything to you so he can’t be that mad.
Runs into you in the kitchens, since you’ve snuck in the back so no one can see you, he’s surprised to find you and more surprised to see you crying
After you tell him you’ve been stood up, he’s furious. It take a lot to get Beel mad. But anything happening to you is probably the #1 way to get him there.
Wants to beat the hell out of that guy. Those muscles aren’t just for show.
Reframes, and uses those big strong arms to wrap you in a hug instead
Tell you not to worry about it. That that guy is dumber than he is to stand you up, and makes you a sundae to help you feel better.
Belphie
Had been giving you the silent treatment since he found out you were going out with someone else. He’s upset about it, but won’t be juvenile enough to tell you that. This is way more mature.
Goes downstairs in the middle of the night, after waking up from his 10th and latest nap of the day, and hears you crying.
You tell him what happened, that were stood up, and Belphie tells you ‘I told you so’.
He hugs you, and takes this opportunity to remind you that no one will love you like he will. So you should just stay here always.
It does feel nice to be appreciated.
He tucks you into bed to get some sleep and you never hear from that guy again. Belphie says he won’t bother you again, but there’s something about the way he said it that was more ominous than reassuring.
Solomon
He had no opinion when you told him. You’re not his, damnit all, so he can’t say anything about it.
It’s not until after that he gives you a piece of his mind. Hindsight is 20/20 so he tells you all the things he doesn’t like about the guy in one fall swoop.
Solomon does feel bad that you’ve been hurt though. It’s a terrible feeling to be neglected or abandoned.
Offers to hex the holy hell out of the guy for you
He won’t have a moments rest without stinging pain. Or break out in boils. His house will catch fire or fall on top of him like in the Wizard of Oz.
You tell him know, but the thought is appreciated. He instead uses his magic for good in creating a soothing potion to heal your damaged ego. Still up for the house thing though.
Simeon
Would hate to admit it, but he’s jealous you’re going out with someone else. It’s a terrible feeling for an angel to feel.
He’s surprised, more than anything, when you show up to Purgatory Hall in tears. Then sympathetic when you tell him what happened.
He’d see you into his sitting room and make you some Celestial Tea
Simeon would try to comfort you as much as he could, assuring you that it’s not all that bad and that you’re better off without someone like that.
He knows they are just words. They can’t heal you instantly. But he does hope they help a little.
He makes a point to check in on you every day after, either in person at classes or via text, until you’re back to normal.
Diavolo
He has no right to be jealous of you being escorted to a party at the castle by someone else. Being the Prince of the Devildom, he certainly couldn’t do it and he doesn’t want you to be alone as a secondary.
When he realizes later that you’re not at the party, and goes to find you crying in the hallway, he’s saddened to hear you’ve been stood up.
What a horrible thing to do. And so publicly like this to his favorite transfer student!
Rules be damned. He’s your escort for this evening now.
He doesn’t know who your date was supposed to be, but hopes that they are there to see you be the belle of the ball on the arm of royalty.
You’re his sweet princess. You deserve nothing less.
Barbatos
Heard you were going on on a date, but says nothing of it. As a butler, it’s not his place.
Also as a butler, he always seems to be around when you need him. Appearing, as if mentally summoned, when you arrive in tears.
He offers you a handkerchief and quickly ferries you to bed so no one else sees you. So you’re not embarrassed.
He makes you so tea, with your favorite biscuits, and waits for you to tell him what happened.
Of course he’s irritated that someone would behave so poorly. But there’s little he could do. Well, there’s a lot he could do but his Lord would not approve of maiming others.
Provides the perfect, appropriate shoulder to cry on and asks you for a ‘make up date’ to accompany him to town tomorrow for errands and coffee. He won’t stand you up.
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wunderlustwriter · 3 years
Text
y’all i had a dream last night so you know what that means
another george weasley imagine
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you and gw got paired up for a research project in potions that you have to work on after class and is due at the end of the week
also, you are the cool edgy half-blood, muggle-born chic ™️ who knows a little bit about everything
oh, and you’re slytherin, ofc
so there’s immediately this tension between you and george bc he’s intimidated by you and lowkey judging bc you’re a slytherin, and you’re on edge bc the slytherin slander is so annoying and you don’t know if the 1/2 of the school’s biggest pranksters can be trusted
but whatever, you two meet at the library after his quidditch practice monday evening and at first both of you just stare at your textbook for a while basking in the awkwardness
eventually you say “Okay what the fuck does half this shit even mean. I feel like I’m reading something written in russian. I mean why do we even have to write a paper about the effects of thistle root on lycanthropes, vampires, and mere-people? Seems kinda niche to me.”
to which george snorts and nods along. “yeah, I think snape just loves to pick the most useless and redundant topics for us to learn about just to inconvenience and torture us.”
“sounds like a sadist to me.”
the two of you start laughing and from there things seem to be less awkward so you both start writing things in venn diagrams and other notes for your paper
nearly half an hour later you start pointing to different parts of a book you’re reading asking him for advice on what it means when he says “wow those are some cool rings you have, where’d you get them?”
then you awkwardly chuckle “uhmmm you know just here and there...” he gives you a look
“honestly?” he nods “most of them i just found around on the ground or at the bottom of the lake. I look for their owners of course, but if i can’t find them i just keep it or give it to someone else. but for the other ones...”
“what, did you rob someone’s grave to get them or something?”
“ha, what no, well not exactly” there’s that look again. “okay okay, so sometimes when I find someone really douchey or bigoted or just an asshole i make it a game to take it off their finger. only if they deserve it!”
“wait so you do that while they’re wearing it.”
you nod “yeah, but like i said only if they’re a douche. like yelling at a kid or about to kick a puppy kind of douche.”
“hmm...”
“what, you don’t believe me?”
“i mean how can you just grab something off of someone’s person without them noticing, do you use your wand or something?”
“no, i’ve actually never tried to magic for that. i usually just create or wait for some kind of diversion, basically anything that attracts their attention, while i quickly grab it. like one time- wait a sec, you’ve got something in your hair.”
after moving a little closer and running your fingers through part of his hair you smirk and hold up your other hand “here’s your bracelet by the way”
it takes a second for him to realize what’s happened as he’s staring at you for a few seconds longer than he should and begins to turn red. “holy shit! how did you do that?”
“it’s all about misdirection, also i think you have something behind your ear” he pulls out a pencil that you tucked in there and just gawks at you while you giggle. “oh and your shoe’s untied.”
“bloody hell, did you use your toes to untie my shoe too?”
“nah i just noticed that’s been untied since you walked in”
you both start laughing, making the librarian shush at you.
“oh you definitely have to teach me that”
still laughing, you nod and respond “one day, but first we need to finish this project.”
when you’re finished for the night you both pack up and head your separate ways
two days later in class a familiar tall red head slides into the seat next to you at your table
“oh, i didn’t realize we were supposed to be sitting with our partners today, i’m sorry.”
“we’re not, i just wanted to sit with you. to learn about your pickpocketing skills, of course.”
“oh nice, i didn’t realize that george told you about that fred “
and with that fred gives you an amused and wide eyed look “uh...” he freezes before turning around and going to his seat while george walks over to you.
“sorry about him. Fred just asked me how my project was going and didn’t believe me when i told him what happened”
“it’s okay, but here’s the parchment i got from his robes, don’t know if you guys need that for later.” you say as you look over your shoulder and wave the paper at fred who starts patting his robes aggressively, looking for the marauder’s map
“Oh, no, yep, mhm, that paper is very important, let me just...” he goes to reach for it in a hurry making you pull it back and question him as his face is closer to yours
“hold on a second, why are you so worried about this paper? what are you two scheming red??” he goes to reach for it again
“hah! wouldn’t you like to know?” fred says from behind you, causing george to shoot him a glare as fred’s grin widens
you’re just about to say something when snape enters the room and ominously stares at the class until everyone sits down and shuts up.
“here’s your paper,” you say when george sits next to you, “just leave me out of whatever prank you two are planning with it please”
“don’t worry love, you’ll be safe this time” he says with a smirk, causing you to blush and take your seat as class starts
the rest of potions goes by as usual, snape almost making someone cry, half of the class imagining 50 different ways to kill him, and him treating all of the pure blood slytherins as if they’re the queen herself
after everyone finished their assigned potion snape tells us to use the rest of class to continue our research project. while everyone else moves to sit with their partners, george turns to you and speaks up “so how did you know the difference between me and fred earlier? not many people do, especially people who don’t know us that well”
“oh, well last night when i was messing with you i noticed that you have some freckles on your neck, but even then i wasn’t really paying attention. I just had a feeling that’s something you two would do so i took a shot and guessed.”
you could see george slightly smile to himself as you both kept talking and turned to work
later that night you were sitting down at the slytherin table with your friends and dorm-mates naiomi and selena [[2 OCs]] for dinner.
the three of you are talking about the charms quiz you just took when you feel a presence come and sit down next to you on your right. when you turn your head you see a very familiar red head grinning at you.
“hey y/n” george says, reaching over your tray and grabbing a bread roll while he leans his back against the table
“uhhh hey Red, what’s up...? you know you’re at the wrong table right?”
“mhm, i know. i just wanted to see you and make sure we’re still on for the project tonight after dinner”
“yup, i’ll meet you at the library” you say raising an eyebrow because something fishy is obviously happening
“actually, i was thinking we could meet at the end of the corridor at 8 and walk down there together, yeah?” he says getting a closer and closer to your face, you’re starting to turn red when you feel his fingers reaching around for your pocket
that’s when you grin and ruffle up his hair with one hand while grabbing his wrist with the other. “how sweet, and awe, look, you’re trying to pick pocket me. you see your diversion was good, not great, but still effective, it’s just your execution that’s sloppy.”
both of you are laughing and george is about to say something when a silver-headed prat interrupts him
“what the bloody hell are you doing here you little rodent blood traitor? don’t you have some kitchen scraps to go eat?”
you watch george’s face falls and hardens as you feel his hand ball into a fist. before he can say or do anything, however, you butt in
“oh piss off and suck my dick malfoy.” rolling your eyes you continue to interrupt Draco while he tries to snipe at you, “and shut it. I really don’t care what lame ass come back you have to say, because, honestly, they’re starting to become downright atrocious. do better. and don’t even think about calling your father to come ‘punish’ me or else i’ll suck his. YUP! THATS RIGHT! YOUR DAD IS A DILF MALFOY. I SAID IT. so Please shut the HELL up unless you want me as your new step mommy to boss you around.”
draco is just staring at you, red faced, wide eyed, and trying to think of a come back. “yup. that’s what i thought. now before you ever open your little trap to speak to me or any of my friends you better think of your dad’s bare naked ass as i’m going down on him.”
he gets up and leaves with his little possy
you’ve attracted the attention of some raven claws behind you and a few slytherins around, but naiomi and selena don’t bat an eye, seeing as stuff like this is normal for you.
george is just grinning from ear to ear and staring at you adoringly “I think you might be my new hero”
you chuckle and shrug your shoulders “i just have to remind draco a few times every year that he’s not invincible and he’s not at the top of the good chain. he should be off of your backs for a month or two now.”
“you, my dear, have just made yourself immune to weasley pranks for the next three months” he says while getting up from the table, still not letting go of your hand. “and i’ll see you at 8” he winks and brings your hand up to his lips for a light kiss before turning around like nothing happened
taglist:
@gaycatlord-stuff
A/N: y’all, the dream i had wasn’t even this part, i just wanted to write something that led up to this one idea i have in my head and i got hella wrapped up in the background LMAO but i’m not mad i really like this. i might even publish part two tonight we’ll see. ALSO i’m sorry i don’t know how to put the “continue reading” button in to make the cover text shorter 💀💀
pt. 2
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gummygowon · 3 years
Text
cute relationship things with ateez!
genre: fluff (a lot)
warnings: none :)
established relationship!
a/n: i meant to post this like two weeks ago but i never finished it so consider this an early valentine’s day gift <3 ;) 
seonghwa:
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for some reason, i feel like seonghwa likes to read books
with that being said, on lazy days where you guys didn’t want to get up and do anything
you guys would read books !!!
before you guys would read some were recommendations from each other on your own
and then maybe rant to each other over little details about the book like how the main character went back to their toxic ex or how the ending of a book was so bad
“seonghwa, how did you even read this?!? the stupid ass main character keeps going back to that one jerk! like does she not realize she deserves more than his ugly ass???!!!?”
“y/n, just keep reading.” 
“but hwa-”
turns out the main character got with the other woman yayyyyy!!! fuck shitty men
i don’t know how it happened but you guys started your own little book club with each other
so you guys could finally talk rant together at the same time about the book
so since you guys started to read the same book and if you guys found down time together you would read together
like, imagine it’s a peaceful friday night
seonghwa is back from work and so are you
you guys already showered and ate dinner
you’re just reading and then seonghwa just scoops you up and then puts you in between his legs with your back against his chest
and you’re like “wtf bro?”
and he’s just like, “what? i wanna read too???”
“didn’t you like read ahead tho??”
“yeah, but i wanna read it again.”
that was a fatass lie
he just wanted to be close to you 
hongjoong:
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ok so, we all know that this man is hella busy all the time
mans is the leader, song writer, producer, dancer, rapper (which is why he is good at all positions)
but you were patient with him and whenever he goes days without seeing you due to his busy ass schedule he would make it up to you yk what i mean
but on the more chill days when you saw hongjoong or even the days where he was cooped in his studio (you would visit him there because sometimes you just had to see him)
you guys would just lay on the couch, just enjoying each other’s presence and not feel like you have to make up for lost time
you would be on the bottom on your phone or reading a magazine/book
then hongjoong would be at the top with his head on your stomach as he would be writing down lyrics that came to mind
killing two birds with one stone you feel me
sometimes you would show him a funny meme that you found or quote something that you just read to him 
“hongjoong, look at the way he fell!” you would be dying of laughter
and then he wouldn’t notice because he was really roped into making lyrics 
but you also didn’t see him focusing so much because you were of course laughing at the kid that accidentally got bitchslapped off the couch because of their sibling
“joongie look!!!”
“what is it?”
you would then show him what happened and then he would look at with that “you really interrupted me for this??” type of look
“i just lost my train of thought for this song because you wanted to show me this kid falling off of a couch???” 
“yes?” 
he would just bring a hand to his face and think what tf? why tf? and then slowly start laughing because of what just happened
“see, wasn’t it funny?”
“a child getting hurt isn’t funny, y/n” he would laugh while scolding you
yunho:
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yunho powers im sorry for this one
alright so, it’s night time 
you guys are about to go to bed after a long day or work/school whatever
your eyes are fluttering closed because the day got you beat beat
but then yunho just kisses your face
and then you open your eyes slowly again to see yunho look like he just got caught doing something he wasn’t supposed to do
like imagine a kid that just got caught drawing on the walls
that’s what his face would look like
he’s just laying there like “i thought you were asleep...”
“i was just about to...”
yunho feels lowkey guilty now because you’re awake now and he knows you had a long day
he just couldn’t resist kissing you 
you just looked so pretty and peaceful sleeping 
mans was reminded by the universe themself about how lucky he was being able to date you
like, godamn what did he do in his past life to deserve you?
ok, back to this reaction idea thing-
yunho would apologize for waking you up with his cheeks a nice rosy color
you just look at him with tired eyes 
“i’ll forgive you, if you give me more kisses.”
and yunho’s smile just lights up the whole damn room and he’s like oh? say less
so he goes to kissing your face
like all over
your nose
your cheeks
forehead
basically anywhere ok?
and you end up laughing because it tickles 
but you just want him to kiss your lips which he does 
... eventually lmao
but when he does your still laughing which causes him to laugh
he tells you “i love you, did you know that?”
and you get all flustered and shit but you still keep that playful energy around 
“i love you too, but you aren’t forgiven just yet”
which leads to more kisses :))))
yeosang:
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ok so you’re now the busy one
yeosang has so much respect for you because holy shit how do you balance that busy ass schedule of yours
your homework loads were no jokes 
then to add to that you have a job which was even more stressful
it was amazing how you can manage all that and still keep a smile on your face
you also had major respect for yeosang as an idol
the industry was not a place to fuck around 
you couldn’t be happier that your boyfriend was lucky enough to have a group who actually cared and supported each other
speaking of ateez, yeosang isn’t the most touchy person in the world
you didn’t mind of course, you’re the same way
however, when he did give you cuddles and kisses you would be a blushing mess
a sort of rare sight that yeosang loved to see
anyways, one night you were busy writing those argumentative essays that you were sure that your fingers would fall off by the time you were finished
you were working on it ever since you got home from school (with the occasional food and bathroom breaks )to the time when yeosang came back from practice
you moved to your shared bed by the time the sweaty boy came home and he was surprised that you were working on one subject for so long
the stupid piece was almost finished by the time yeosang was out of the shower
however, you didn’t even notice
you were too immersed in your writing to notice
yeosang took this as an opportunity to sit behind you and wrap his arms around your waist and watch over your shoulder as you worked
and of course, he would kiss your cheek occasionally
this was super sweet gesture but yeosang but you didn’t the notice that he wrapped his arms around you
“ai yah! what the hell?” you yelled and turned around to see your boyfriend clutching his chest
“oh it’s just you.”
yeosang would give you a deadpanned look and be like, “yeah, who else tf???”
you would apologize and kissing his cheek before returning to back to work 
which yeosang would return to hugging your waist and keep his head on your shoulder
and give you occasional kisses on your cheek or neck
after that night, it became a weekly occurrence
which you loved of course, who wouldn’t love their bf cuddling them while they chased their bag
san:
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i am very excited for this one
ok so, san loves playing with your hair
it’s just so much fun 
running his fingers through it or just attempting to braid it or put it into a tiny ponytail
he loved it
he would probably always play with your while you were watching tv together, sitting together in the car, or even before you guys fall asleep
then one day after san came home early from work 
you guys were chilling on the bed watching the latest k-drama that came out since san made you wait so you guys could watch it together
san was in between your legs with his back leaning against your chest 
and that’s when you decided to run your fingers through his soft, fluffy hair
that’s also when san asked you to braid his hair
“sure, what type of braid though?”
“there’s different kinds????” 
“yes, san. now pick one.” you gave him your phone that was pulled up to different types braids.
“i want the french ones. they sound fancy.”
you roll your eyes and start sectioning his hair into two sections and start braiding his hair and lightly pull on the pink strands because you know san likes his hair pulled
so you doing his hair right 
and you begin rambling about your day/week
talking about whatever interesting happened to you because you know that san likes hearing you talk no matter what it’s about
however, you were knee deep into talking about the latest drama at work that you didn’t even realize that san stopped talking
“san?”
he didn’t answer and his head would be dipping down so low you were surprised you didn’t fall over
“baby?”
san still wouldn’t respond to you 
but this time he just flipped over so his head would be on your stomach as he wrapped your arms around your stomach
“mmmmmmm?”
“nevermind love, just sleep.” 
he would respond by burying his head further into your stomach and tightened his hold around you
you kissed his head and ran your fingers through his hair which lulled san to sleep even more
“goodnight sannie.”
mingi:
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you have been best friends with song mingi ever since you moved into the tiny neighborhood that you call home
it all started when your parents brought you over to your next door neighbor’s house for breakfast on a cold saturday morning 
you were extremely shy when you were little so the only thing you could remember about your first experience with mingi was hiding behind your mother’s leg for the first hour of being there and watching the young boy play with his toy cars and planes before he finally offered a pirate ship to you
ever since that unforgettable saturday, you pretty much spent the rest of your childhood with mingi
you guys were practically joined at the hip 
even when you were getting endlessly teased by your classmates for the first month of school for having an accent whenever you spoke 
which resulted in you running to the bathroom crying
not even a minute later, you heard someone burst through the girls’ bathrrom
“y/n?”
you peaked your head out of the stall to see your tall neighbor looking out of breath
“mingi, you aren’t supposed to be here!” you said in between sobs
“it’s okay, i don’t care.” he said as he awkwardly wrapped his arms around you. “are you okay?”
you shook your head no looking at him with tears running down your face
the poor boy was internally freaking out since he has no clue on how to comfort people (especially if they’re a girl)
he was like eight at the time give him a little break
so of course, his first reaction was to make you laugh somehow
and he did this by randomly recreating the “boots and cats, boots and cats” rhythm after seeing siri do it in a youtube video and started to bop his head 
surprised by his sudden movements, you laughed out of pure confusion
as soon as mingi saw the corner of your lips flip upwards he began rapping faster to the point where he was gasping for breath leading him into a coughing fit 
“mingi you can breathe, y’know!” you giggled in between words
after the young boy had caught his breath from hacking away at his lungs, he smiled at you 
until- the teacher had came into the bathroom, scolding mingi for going into the girls’ restroom
even though mingi didn’t care at all that he got in trouble, the only thing he cared about was that you were feeling better
ever since then whenever you were sad or having a bad day mingi would whip out his phone and ask siri to rap while he free-styled over the monotone voice 
he literally still does it
even two years into your relationship-
“siri, can you rap for me?” mingi would ask his phone as he pointed his free arm at you
“boots and cats-”
“mingi, please no.” you laughed in between tears, your mood rising with every beat
wooyoung:
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i wholeheartedly believe that wooyoung would kiss you face if you were sad
but the first time this happened, you guys were still fairly new into your relationship
which meant that you weren’t completely ready to be extremely vulnerable around wooyoung 
because in your mind, letting someone see you at your lowest lows of means that you really trust and love someone to let them see you like that
you always wanted to be known as the strong person in the friend group
you were that glue that held everyone together
always listening to others and taking care of others before yourself
which is why wooyoung fell in love with you in the first place
he had never been in a relationship where someone was so caring and thoughtful of others that he was scared that he wouldn’t be enough for you and that you deserved better
of course, he didn’t tell you that right away but he confessed to you about that wayyy later in your relationship which is another story to be told
but one day, life was coming at you so fucking fast
assignments were piling up left and right and deadlines were literally every other day
and then there seemed to be an increase in the amount of angry karens at your work
and your patience was thinning everyday with those people
then to top it all off, all the tests you’ve been studying for, you got mediocre grades, some even worse in other subjects
it just felt like no matter how much work you put into whatever you do, you got half ass results
it was just pushing your mental health further into the ground
you could handle a C every once in awhile but multiple? on back to back tests? no fucking way you just couldn’t
those stupid, dark thoughts would cloud your mind in an instant and on days like this, you would just let them consume you
you were too tired to pick yourself up again and fight back which led to you crying in wooyoung’s arms
usually, you would feel so embarrassed crying over things like this when you know other people have it worse but you couldn’t hold in it anymore 
you ranted about yourself in between your hiccups from crying which would hurt wooyoung’s heart a little bit
because he thought of you as such a strong and kind person- the complete opposite of what you were saying about yourself
so when you were done talking, wooyoung made you look at him and assured you that you were not any of those nasty things that you said about yourself
each insult turned into a thoughtful compliment accompanied by a kiss
“y/n, you are so intelligent-” 
kiss
“caring-”
kiss
“beautiful-”
kiss
“more than everything i ever wanted”
kiss
by the time wooyoung was done, you were a giggling mess
“and this is why i love you.”
he finally kissed you on your lips, smiling into it like the dork he is
it was the first ever time he told you that he loved you
jongho:
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i am also a firm believer that jongho would sing his s/o to sleep
like with that heavenly voice of his, he better put them to sleep 
so on the first night you ever slept with jongho, you were too nervous to go to bed even though your body was screaming at you to close your eyes 
you kept tossing and turning every few minutes or your eyes would shoot open with your heart racing
at this point, you gave up on trying to sleep and got up (carefully to not wake up your sleeping boyfriend) to get a drink
while you were in the kitchen, clutching your chest in an effort to get yourself to calm down, jongho had stirred awake to an empty bed
a flash of panic surged through his body as he momentarily forgot where he was since he wasn’t at his dorm his room never looked this clean 
yawning, the vocalist would wander into the light with his eyes squinted, “y/n?”
“oh my god!” you jumped, water almost spilling out your glass
jongho covered his ears, “what are you doing up?”
“oh,” you felt your cheeks turn red since you felt bad for waking your boyfriend up. “i can’t sleep.”
“why?” he asked, walking towards the couch.
“i don’t know.” you answered as you followed close behind. 
you curled up next to jongho, clutching his shirt “i’m sorry for waking you up.”
jongho smiled tiredly at you before kissing your head, “don’t be. it’s okay. i don’t have work tomorrow anyways.”
you smiled in response before the two of you guys fell into a silence
“do you want me to sing you to sleep?”
“yes, please.” you murmured into his side as jongho placed his other arm around you, successfully trapping you in between his arms
he began singing softly into your ear as he stroked your hair
his warm voice coaxing your eyes to close 
at last, your mind was at peace with itself
your heart beat slowing down
and by the time the song was finished you were fast asleep in arms
jongho kissed your forehead once more 
“i love you.”
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astridthevalkyrie · 3 years
Text
summer rain: chapter 1
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Your days in the Training Corp aren’t too out of the ordinary. You make friends, you train hard, and you eat dinner every day.
Oh, and you’re also hellbent on getting revenge against Humanity’s Strongest Soldier. 
Chapter 2
Read on FF.net or AO3.
Helloooo, beautiful people. I’m so excited about this story! This is now the official first part of the series, so it’s a prequel to the three oneshots I’ve already posted. If you haven’t read them, no worries, you can read this just fine. If you want to, just know they all have an established relationship and will reference the past, so you may possibly get spoiled. 
I plan for this to have five or so chapters, so buckle up, and as always, happy reading!
You’ve been expecting more.
Maybe that’s the wrong perspective to have. It’s still the military, and it’s still your first day and sure, that’s exciting and all, but you’ve heard stories. People always describe their first day of training as absolutely terrifying, but life-changing. They say that the first day is the day all the baby-faced cadets realize they’re in over their heads. It’s an introduction to the rest of their lives. At least, that’s the case for the people who stay. If one can’t handle a verbal beating, how can they stand any chance against the titans? The first day changes everything.
This, however, isn’t life-changing. It’s not terrifying. It’s rather...dull.
To be fair, the man in front doesn’t look like he’s enjoying it either.
You’ve heard of him, of course you have. Even back within Sina, people talk. A newcomer, a gift from the walls, humanity’s savior. Recently joined the Survey Corp and yet already a lieutenant, a definite shoe-in for the next available section commander position. Apparently his origins are a bit of a mystery, but he’s either the long lost son of a rich merchant or he’s come from outside the walls themselves because it’s just impossible that any common person can possess the skills he’s rumored to have. You’re not sure you believe all of it - apparently he’s so fast that the titans can’t even see him coming? yeah, sure - and yet there’s just something about him that gives off a truly well-earned confident aura. That’s been the most exciting part so far, the chance to see him up close, to see that he’s actually real.
Still, since he began talking, Lieutenant Levi hasn’t once raised his voice. He hasn’t screamed at them all for being the weakest pieces of shit he’s ever seen. He hasn’t even told them about how they’re going to train to become snacks for the titans. It’s disappointing. You’ve been ready to stand your ground, to show you’re made of some tough stuff. That can’t happen when your trainer won’t even bother to strike fear into your heart. Where other people may be relieved, you are mourning this loss of the traditional military experience.
At the very least, he’s not the actual trainer. He started his speech with a complaint that their actual instructor was sick for the day so now he had the absolute pleasure to welcome dozens of new fucking brats to their new home and occupation. His words drip with venom and boredom - clearly, he didn’t join to do any of this. It’s beneath him. All in all, Lieutenant Levi seems rather...arrogant. Maybe it’s well-deserved. But you don’t have to like it.
As he walks up to people at random who shout out their bare identities, the lieutenant snaps out comments that seem like they’re meant to bully rather than to frighten.
“Your posture is shit.”
“Oh wow, I bet the titans will be real scared of your noodle arms.”
“And here I thought these villages would send their best and brightest. Instead they sent you.”
But you’re not one to let things get to you so easily. You have your fist balled to your chest proudly, ready to serve humanity. You’ve fought to get where you are, and now you’re really, actually standing here, with your new comrades besides you, and you couldn’t be more proud. A bright smile settles on your face. You will make the best out of this, no matter your humanity-saving trainer’s dour mood. 
Unfortunately, said humanity-saving trainer takes notice of your smile, and with his gaze locked on his new target, he walks up to you, eyes narrowed in irritation.
“What’s your deal?”
You straighten your back, snap to attention, and look directly ahead as you know is appropriate. “Cadet (F/N) (L/N), sir, from Stohess District!”
His expression doesn’t throw you off, despite it looking like he’s never been so irritated in his life. You know you haven’t done anything wrong (at least not yet), so him looking that pissed off must be an internal issue, nothing to do with you. You’re not any different than any of the other cadets that have introduced themselves.
“Cadet (F/N) (L/N),” he says as though he’s testing out a brand new curse word, with just a hint of mockery in his voice. “I didn’t ask for your name or where you were from. I asked what your deal was.”
Well what in the holy hells is that supposed to mean?
Is what you want to say, but instead you simply furrow your brows and ask curly. “Sir?”
“What the fuck are you so happy about?” he clarifies, annoyance displayed clearly on his face.
Well damn, no need to be so edgy. You aren’t necessarily required to be as serious as everyone else here, and smiling isn’t a crime last time you checked. But this is obviously Lieutenant Levi’s thing, to be snarky and mean, and the sooner you answer, the sooner he’ll move on and find a new victim. “Just happy to be here, sir.”
Your smile stays right where it is.
“Oh, is that it?” He stares at you, deadpan. “You like the thought of being eaten? Does the idea just make your day? Do you fantasize about it at night? Let it lull you to sleep?”
Your smile grows a little strained.
Passion aggression is nothing new. You grew up in Stohess, you’re used to your fair share of cattiness. The lieutenant must take lessons from the tea-sipping high class ladies you’d basically grown up with, because he reminds you of them vividly. Ironic, considering you thought the military would be an escape to a life that was real and included less passive bullshit. It’s that frustration at the similarity that makes your polite mask crack.
The response slips through your lips before you can stop yourself. “No, sir, but last night I did happen to dream of a trainer that was tough enough to handle one of his subordinates smiling.”
You can be catty too. 
The grounds become more silent than they already were. It’s as though everyone is suddenly holding their breath at this new confrontation, just waiting to see what the newly dubbed hope of humanity will do if someone matches his sass. The loud silence is what finally makes you just a smidge nervous - surely, they won’t kick you out on your very first day just because of a smart comment, right?
Impatient and a bit anxious, you finally allow yourself to look directly in his eyes, and you’re suddenly stricken by how grey they are. You don’t think you’ve ever met anyone with grey eyes. They’re damn gorgeous. And there’s a hint of...something in them, and to your surprise it’s not rage. He looks calculatingly gleeful, as though he’s just been waiting for someone to say something back to him. He appears cruel and delighted all at once, and the contrast of it along with the striking silver hue is more personality than you’ve ever seen in someone’s eyes before.
It’s a breathtaking sight. You move in just a millionth of a centimeter to get a closer look -
And then he moves, lightning fast, reeling back and swinging his leg around to sweep your legs from under you. With a gasp, you hit the ground hard, head ringing and vision blurring for a few seconds. Your hair, which was loose around your shoulders, flies across your face, some of it entering your mouth. From above you, grey eyes are triumphant, looking down on you as though to ask whether or not that’s tough enough for you. You’d love to answer, but your head is throbbing and you can only let out a pathetic, confused noise that causes titters to spread throughout the room.
What the hell just happened?
You move to get up, but he’s quicker, slamming his foot down on your leg and holding you right where you are. For someone with such a short stature, he looks pretty damn tall from down here. Maybe this is the sight that the titans barely get to see before he slices through them. 
Everyone is watching, even if they’re not turning their hands. This is their entertainment today, and the fool has just made its move. The fool being you, of course. They’re all hungry to see how this will play out.
Your cheeks glow bright with embarrassment, but you are not going to waver. Not on the first day. This is what you wanted, right? You wanted someone who’d be a hardass, who’d strike fear in you and make this a day you’d never forget. Well, Lieutenant Levi is your wish come true.
“Please remove your foot, sir,” you muster as politely as you can, looking up at him icily.
He digs the heel of his shoe into your thigh to make a point, and maybe to see if you’ll cry out in pain. But you look him in his strange grey eyes and you only blink, a small smile returning to your face. Will he kick someone who’s already down?
The moment seems to last forever, and you briefly entertain the fantasy that time is freezing for him as much as it is for you.
And then it’s all broken - he takes his foot off and walks right by you, and the only words you’re spared after being humiliated are, “Tie your hair up, you look ridiculous.”
Thus goes your first meeting with Humanity’s Strongest Soldier.
____________________
Dinner that night is filled with chatter. It seems people have found their loyal companions pretty fast, and cliques are forming faster than a speeding bullet. 
Luckily, you don’t need to worry about making friends. Besides the fact that you’re charming and perfect (according to everyone else and definitely not just you), you joined the military with your best friend from childhood. Millie Shackel is every bit the Stohess lady you are, the Rose to your Maria, the jelly to your butter. It’s amazing how much two girls can bond over a shared hate for the lack of activity happening within their stuffy town.
You gnaw at the bread on your plate, squeezing your eyes shut in pain after a particularly hard bite makes the back of your head throb. Not for the first time, you place your hand gingerly on the back of your skull, confirming that there’s no blood pouring out.
“Shouldn’t have mouthed off,” Millie quips from across the table, looking at you amusedly.
“Thanks,” you mutter bitterly, abandoning the bread for now until the soreness goes away. “Didn’t think one stupid comment was going to make him go berserk on me.”
She laughs, confirming you sound every bit as stupid as you feel. “I don’t think that classifies as berserk. That was a superior putting you in your place.”
“Suck-up,” you accuse, eyes narrowed. She only rolls her eyes, and you bring the cup of water to your lips and begin simply guzzling it down when someone claps you on the back, making you choke.
You turn to glare, still coughing up water, at two guys behind you. The one who nearly killed you is tall, with hair the color of bananas, and he’s grinning with no regrets, the shameful bastard. The other one behind him looks apologetic, red-haired with pretty green eyes. He whacks his friend on the arm. “You idiot, you nearly sent her to the infirmary!”
“Oh, come on.” The tall guy slides next to you without permission, slinging an arm around you as though you’re the closest of chums. Back in Stohess, you’d have called for his execution or some shit. “Surely the girl who talked back to Lieutenant Levi can handle some water going down the wrong way.”
Millie does not look pleased at the intruder, and looks even more grouchy when his friend sits down next to her, albeit keeping a much more respectful distance. When you finally stop coughing violently, you shove the guy’s arm away.
“A-asshole, what the hell’s your problem?” 
“There’s no problem, kid.” He nudges your arm with his elbow. “I just wanted to see the balls on you. Guess it was overexaggerated.”
“Obviously,” you snap, “I just talked back, I didn’t hop over the wall and kill a titan.”
“Regardless, good job with the way you handled it. The others are talking about you.”
Millie gives you a stern look. “Hear that? Now we’re the troublemakers.”
You shrug apologetically, and decide to take another crack at eating your bread. This time, it goes down easier, with only a light sting to remind you of the lieutenant’s cruelty. 
“I’m Stephen,” the redhead says with a shy smile, extending his hand. You shake it, then turn your gaze questioningly to the one next to you. He grins cockily, waiting for you to ask. You don’t.
“This is Ricky.” Stephen spoils his fun, sounding exasperated. 
“I assume you two are close.” Millie wrinkles her nose distastefully. You bite back a laugh - there’s that Stohess bitchiness that you love about her.
“We met this morning,” Ricky responds, and you can’t tell if he’s joking or not.
The two of you warm up to the boys soon enough. Ricky is rather friendly when he’s not trying to steal your food thinking you won’t notice, and Stephen is downright sweet, his emerald eyes brightening when you ask him where he’s from. He goes off on a ramble about his village which is somewhere smack dab in the middle of the land within Wall Rose. Apparently their local stew is the best there is. You privately disagree; nothing quite tastes like the stew they make in the Orvud District, least of all this bland loaf of bread in your hand.
Ricky, on the other hand, is from Shiganshina, which is apparently an outer city of Wall Maria (so the two boys really had just met that morning). 
“So, I’m guessing it’s the MP for you two?” Ricky says. Millie looks offended.
“That’s not right for you to assume!” She deflates a little. “But yes, it is.”
“Hey.” You shoot her a scowl. “It’s the MP for you. I don’t have any intention of hurrying back to precious Sina.”
Millie gazes at you with her we’ll talk about this later look like she has every time you’ve brought up that you have no intention of returning to fucking Stohess where nothing ever happens. Before she can say anything, Ricky ruffles your hair fondly. 
“Should’ve known you were made of tougher shit than that. So what, you like playing hero?”
You shrug. “No, I just have a sob story. Dead old Dad was a Scout, and then he was titan chowder.”
Stephen looks disturbed at how bluntly you say it, and even Ricky is a bit thrown off. You chuckle at their expressions, waving a hand nonchalantly. “It’s fine, it happened a while ago. I barely remember him. But you know, what better way to connect with your dead dad than to align yourself with the people who let him die, right?”
Ricky’s mouth hangs open as Millie snorts. “You can laugh, she’s making a joke. Get used to her sense of humor, it’s always this bad.”
“I resent that.”
“So you don’t care about getting into the top ten?” Stephen asks carefully - scoping out the competition, you realize.
“Couldn’t give less of a shit,” you answer coolly, “but Millie obviously does.”
“I’ll get into the top ten, it’s not about that.” Millie says confidently, shaking her head as though it’s ridiculous to even imagine that she wouldn’t. After all, you two were raised to be perfect. “The real goal is to be first.”
Ignoring the madly ambitious look in her eyes, you focus on Stephen. “So what is it for you? The Scouts?”
He winces bashfully. “I’m...undecided.”
You laugh out loud, a bit meanly. “What, undecided like you’re going to some top university in Mitras? This is the Training Corp, Stephen, you’re not gonna get to try out a bit of everything. Just choose whether or not you wanna be shipped off to a pointless death, and then you’ve made your decision.”
Stephen frowns, shaking his head. “If it was that simple, then what would be the point of choosing?”
Who in the holy hells asked for his philosophical wisdom, that’s what you want to know. Rolling your eyes, you turn to Ricky, who is chewing on your bread, abandoned after your taste buds just wouldn’t adjust without the butter you were used to. With his mouth full, he answers easily. “Scouts.”
You nod. At least he’s sure.
____________________
“That wasn’t right,” Millie says later, right as you’re about to lie down on a scratchy-looking bed.
“What?”
“What you said to him. He can take his time deciding if he wants to. And it’s just rich, coming from you.”
Your eye twitches in irritation. “You’re just pissed because I don’t wanna take on the most boring job in the world.”
“Grow up,” Millie hisses, venom laced in her voice. “Not everything’s about your entertainment.”
Turning around, you see your best friend with arms crossed, giving you a disapproving look that reminds you of your mother. How odd. What’s that old saying about people becoming what they most hate?
“You’re gonna lecture me now too? Hit me with some philosophy, maybe?” You raise your brow, daring her to say more. “Or do you wanna knock me over again? Maybe I’ll get a concussion this time.”
Millie scoffs, sitting down on the bed she’s claimed. “You know what, it was nice. Seeing someone put you in your place like that.” Her lips quirk under your hard gaze. “Maybe he’ll teach you a thing or two about taking things seriously. Give you some actual goals to achieve.”
The only thing Lieutenant Levi will teach you is to never get distracted by something like how beautiful someone’s eyes look ever again. Even now, you can still picture him, the way he stood in front of you, startled you, threw you off. The way his eyes were filled with more duality than you’d ever expected to see in a person.
Pretending like you didn’t just fantasize about his pretty grey irises, you roll your eyes and flop down on the bed next to her’s. “He’s not gonna teach me jack shit. He’s not even our trainer.”
Millie hums, whether it’s to you or to herself you don’t know, and when you look at her again she’s closed her eyes, clearly wanting to end what was a very long day. It’s not long before you join her.
“(F/N).”
“Yeah?”
“I miss home.”
You don’t, but you keep it to yourself.
The last thing you think of before you fall asleep is how cold the lieutenant had looked when he humiliated you, and your cheeks burn angrily.
____________________
Two weeks pass by in a blur. Once training starts, there’s not much time to think about something like goals, because everyone’s goal is simply living until dinner each night. Avoid getting yelled at, attend classes, study hard, and for the love of all things holy don’t fall on your face when you’re balancing in the practice ODM gear. 
It’s a rush, and you actually find yourself enjoying it. The food still tastes stale and the bed is still too hard to be comfortable, but there’s an easy routine that’s so much more than sit still and look pretty. While you’ve never been a fan of routine, this is different. There’s a purpose to this, even if everyone has different things they’re working towards. Whether they’re trying their best to show what they’re made of and get into the top ten like Millie, or pushing themselves because they get starry-eyed at the thought of saving humanity like Rashad, or simply staying out of trouble to avoid getting meal privileges taken away like Clara, everyone is working towards something, and it’s thrilling to be in the midst of it, to be a part of something meaningful.
You and Ricky are fast friends - he’s surprisingly not too insufferable and he shares your enthusiasm for not taking things so seriously. He also seems like he’s looking for a partner in crime, someone to partake in the oh-so delightful task of slacking off with. Millie is throwing herself into perfecting everything, and Stephen, while not as crazy as she is, is more nervous about losing respectability in front of their trainers and comrades. So the two of you naturally gravitate towards each other, because jeez, at least a few people here need to remember that life still exists outside of all of the training and military drama. 
Today is the first time they’re letting you practice hand-to-hand combat, and while that’s obviously ridiculous since you’re training to fight titans (or just bully people, if you’re joining the MP, but Millie didn’t appreciate you voicing that out loud), it’s also a chance for you to show off a natural talent. 
You’re flexible. And fairly fast too.
Sure, you’re no fighter, but back home you were put into dancing lessons since you were a wee young thing, so you have a much higher tolerance than most of these chumps. You can take a few hard punches here and there, and you’re fluid with your movements, so you’re giving as good as you get. Even combat is a dance in a certain way, it has all the same elements at any rate. Everything comes down to the placement of the feet, and every other body is an accessory that has to be utilized perfectly to do any damage. 
Unfortunately, Ricky’s fought, like actually fought - fucking peasants from Maria and their street fights - and so as much as you put up a damn good fight, he eventually gets you in a hold from behind. You squirm in his grasp as he laughs, digging his fingers in your side. You try to protest, but it’s hard when he’s tickling you so hard.
“H-hey, hey!” Your giggling only gets two octaves louder when Ricky doesn’t let up. “Stop!” Ricky’s laugh mixes in with yours, until he’s lifting you off the ground. Your breathing becomes painful as you struggle against his grip, clawing at his hands. “Ricky! Let go!”
Finally, he decides to show mercy, dropping you. He regrets it pretty soon, though, because then you’re on him quickly, throwing a hard punch against his shoulder. He groans, letting out a pained, “What the hell, (F/N)?” but you’re not done. You grab the collar of his uniform, and tug it forward briefly to give yourself some momentum to shove him back as hard as you can.
Ricky stumbles on his feet, catching himself before he falls at the last second. There’s a determined expression in his eyes, not quite competitive but suddenly eager to show off.
“So, think your dainty dancing is gonna give you the advantage here?” he challenges, balling his fists in front of his chest. You do the same. “Hate to break it to you, kid, but that’s not how that works.”
“Beat me, then. Properly.” You smirk, planting your feet firmly. Let him throw the first punch, you decide. “I have to be on the ground for you to win.”
Ricky’s clever too, knowing you intend to use his size against him. He lowers his arms, extending them as though he’s going to let you take a free shot. Yeah, you’re not that stupid. You stay right where you are, raising an unimpressed brow. The two of you stare each other down, trying your best not to break into smiles. 
“Hit me.”
“Hard pass.”
“Because you know your punch will be too weak?”
“How’s your shoulder, Ricky? Should be feeling fine, since my punch was so weak.”
He barks out a laugh, rolling his shoulder back experimentally. “Like getting hit by a feather.”
Okay, trash talk isn’t part of the combat training that the trainer, Instructor Grumman, has assigned. But it’s still fun, and it’s about a thousand times more preferable than actually fighting. Fighting is painful and pointless. Trash talk is entertaining and doable. 
Still, you hunch your shoulders. If Ricky really won’t move, you’ll come at him with full force. Digging your heel into the ground, you give yourself a boost and run towards him with a burst of speed. His eyes widen, and his first instinct is to hold out his hands to keep you at bay. But with the close proximity and his lanky figure, it won’t be enough. You’ll have him on his back within seconds if you ram into him in one, two -
You don’t make it.
You don’t make it because you’re suddenly flung into the air. You let out a frantic shriek and bring your arms up to shield your face. The ground approaches with dizzying speed and you hit it with a sickening thud. Your hands are suddenly covered in scratches and you open your mouth to furiously ask Ricky what the fuck he was thinking and how did he even do that and did he have to throw you so high -
But when you look up, it’s cold grey eyes that meet you.
Fuck.
The glare that was supposed to be for Ricky is now aimed at him, unadulterated hate coursing through your veins. This is the first time you’ve seen him since that day. Just what in the actual fuck is his problem, and just what had you done to deserve being thrown over his shoulder and up into the sky like a fucking ragdoll? You hadn’t mouthed off this time. Hell, you didn’t even know he was there, so just what the fuck was he punishing you for?
“People who don’t take their training seriously usually end up looking up like this,” he hisses. His glare matches yours, which is ridiculous, because he’s the one who knocked you down. Why is he pissed off? “‘Course, they’re usually looking up at a titan, but we don’t have any of those on hand for me to demonstrate.”
Yeah, he’s far from a titan. Fucking shrimp.
“I was taking my training very seriously, sir,” you say with gritted teeth. “In fact, I would have defeated my opponent had you not stepped in and shot me up in the air.” Your hands would also have significantly fewer bruises. 
He snorts, actually snorts, like you’ve just told a hilarious joke. “A real opponent isn’t going to let you run that mouth of yours before they come at you. You’d be dead in two fucking seconds.”
People are looking now. Everyone remembers that first day, and they all look as though their favorite stage actors have come to town to perform a show. They’re all waiting to see just what the girl who talked back to Lieutenant Levi will do now. A circus trick, perhaps? They don’t know what you’re made of - no one is going to see you crack. And definitely not because of this insufferable man.
“You don’t know that, sir.” You say it with a poisonous smile, wanting him to know that it’s not meant to be respectful. “I might just make it. Maybe I’ll even make it longer than you.”
There are hushed gasps all around you, but the lieutenant pays them no mind. He looks amused, as if you’re just a stupid little girl, an arrogant brat who somehow thinks she’s somehow stronger than him. You’re not an idiot, you know that he’s an excellent soldier who will probably make captain soon, and you’re a lowly cadet who doesn’t even know the basics yet. But once you’re trained up, once you have experience, you think you could take him on, and you could possibly win.
Lieutenant Levi leans down, crouching on his legs before leaning in. He grabs your shoulder harshly, and leans in to whisper in your ear. “I’ll be waiting, (L/N).”
You almost feel respected until he adds, “Waiting to see the day that fucking smile gets wiped off your face.”
With that, he stands up and turns. Turns to walk away. Turns as though you’re not still on the ground. Turns as though your comrades aren’t snickering around you, convinced that he just put you in your place a second time. Turns as though he didn’t just single you out for no damn reason - who even fucking asked him to watch? Who asked him to interfere in your business? Why didn’t anyone else demand his attention? You weren’t the only one goofing off. Hell, there were some people who were actually just lazing around! Where was their punishment?
Furiously, you speak before your brain can catch up.
“Why don’t you fight me, Lieutenant?” you say loudly as you get to your feet.
He stops.
Ricky, who is safely standing a few feet away now, gives you a wide-eyed look, silently asking if you’re brain damaged. But you pay him no mind, your eyes focused on the back of Lieutenant Levi’s head, probably burning a hole in him with your gaze by now. Immediately, the crowd changes sides again, hushed oohs spreading around. It’s not enthusiastic, no one actually believes you’ll triumph, but they are enthusiastic that you have the balls to try.
He turns, giving you the driest expression you’ve ever seen, and you half expect to be dismissed. To be told that you’re too weak to even think about fighting him.
Instead, his stance changes, his fists are raised, and he’s accepted your challenge.
You know you can’t win. That’s not the point. The point is to hold out. For a whole minute, at least. Half a minute. Was twenty seconds too generous?
There’s a small part of you that regrets mouthing off this time.
Lieutenant Levi doesn’t have to waste any time staring you down. He has no need to debate in his head about who should throw the first punch, and nor does he grant you the courtesy of devising a strategy in your head first. In half a second, he’s approaching you with dizzying speed, fist reeled back, about to knock you over for the second time today.
But you’re sick and tired of these fast maneuvers. 
You duck down just as he closes the gap between you, and you go for his legs. He grunts in surprise as you make contact, clutching tightly. It may look pathetic. Your arms are wrapped around his thighs, which you basically just dived into. Your face is squished against his hip. Your feet have left the ground, as you’ve thrown your entire body at him. At this moment, you look absolutely ridiculous.
But it’s worth it.
The lieutenant loses his balance as his feet slip from under him. You can feel him falling down, down, down, with a gasp that is just fucking music to your ears. This is turning out better than you’ve ever hoped for. You’ve proved everyone wrong, even yourself. He’s going to hit the floor, and you’re going to win. You’ll win.
Or at least, you would have.
You’re both hurtling through the air for one glorious moment. Then, recovering from his shock in an instant, Lieutenant Levi spins the two of you in midair, and despite all your efforts and quick calculations, it’s your back that hits the floor again with a loud crack, air knocked clean out of your lungs. You gasp for breath. His knees are digging into your neck, you’re going to choke -
He takes no time to recover. He’s up and on his feet in a second, brushing the nonexistent dirt off his pants, and you’re left panting with your hand on your throat, trying to recover what little dignity you have left as laughter erupts around you. Dizziness and confusion overwhelms you, as does something else. Just a few minutes ago, you’d been looking at him hatefully. Well, you from five minutes ago had no idea what hate was. You could kill him right now, this arrogant, pompous, cruel jerk. 
How dare he look so unperturbed? Like this is just a normal weekday for him?
A hand yanks you up by your hair, nails digging in your scalp painfully. You’re brought to your knees with a heaving gasp. He tugs your head up until you’re looking at him properly, and he has the nerve to smirk. It’s slight - perhaps he knows a full blown smile would look creepy on him - but it’s there, mocking you.
When he speaks, it’s just a little louder than a murmur. “I thought I told you to tie your hair up.”
Then he releases you, and your buckle over in pain. The position literally has you bowing down to him. White hot anger seeps through you. Consumes you. When he starts walking away, his every step thunders in your head, echoing a million times. He had no right. 
No right at all.
It seems like Millie’s wish has come true. You have a goal now. A goal that Lieutenant Levi has so graciously given you.
You’ve decided. No matter what happens, you’re going to get revenge on Humanity’s Strongest Soldier. He’s going to fucking pay.
____________________
You’re pacing out in the field later that day, muttering under your breath, the events from earlier replaying in your head on loop. Millie’s decided to give up on getting you to come study with her, and she’s blatantly refused to participate in your little quest for revenge, citing it as “pointless and foolhardy.” Well, this whole thing is pointless and foolhardy. The Training Corp is just a way to produce more dead bodies every year. But Millie didn’t agree with your line of logic and has left you to brood on your own.
Realistically, what are your options? It’s not an easy task to take on. Humiliating a man who is now so respected and admired will be difficult when his ego soars sky high. Something heavy will be needed to bring it down. Now you have no intention of ruining him for life, nothing major or extremely dangerous. If you did have such an intent, it would’ve been rather simple, just a letter back home to your mother to spread the word of what humanity’s hero was really like. Not that she’s inclined to listen to your demands nowadays, but it’s a doable plan that would work one way or another. But you want to embarrass Lieutenant Levi the exact same way he embarrassed you. You want to knock him flat on his back, while everyone watches, and you want to stand triumphantly as he kneels down to you.
Someone listening to your thoughts right about now would think you were having a vivid sexual fantasy. You groan, slumping down against the bark of a tree. It’s going to be dark soon. You have a curfew that you’re inclined to obey. But you simply can’t go back without thinking of a plan. He deserves it. He deserves to be utterly humiliated. Punishing you is one thing. Beating you in a fight is only natural. 
But holding you up by your hair like you’re one of the fucking spoils of war only to have you kneel to him - that’s sick. He’s sick, and probably perverted. You wonder if he’s always been like that, or if the glory has gone to his head. And you wonder why he’s chosen you to play this game with. Because of a smile and some cheek? That’s no excuse. 
Maybe you’re just the prettiest one here, and he has a crush.
Even the cocky thought can’t distract you enough from your frustration. You can’t possibly beat him. There’s a reason he’s getting so much attention. It’s because he can fight like no other, and it’s all natural talent too. Frankly, you call bullshit, no one is just that good without any practice, but whatever, not the point right now. Who could possibly make you capable enough to beat the lieutenant in a fight? Who could possibly know all his weaknesses? 
Probably only him.
Your eyes widen.
____________________
The sun shines brightly the next day. You feel the warm breeze from the open windows kissing your cheek as you run through the base. Most people passing by pay you no mind, although a few give you questioning looks. But they don’t say anything, probably figuring you’re just a lost newbie who’s inevitably going to get yelled at when you show up late for class. But they’re mistaken, you’re not lost at all. You’re running with purpose. And well, you might be late for class, but it’ll be fine, you know Stephen takes detailed notes that he’s willing to share, and even if he feels like being mean, this is much more important.
Originally, the plan was to go all the way to his office, the path pieced together from directions you’d gotten from Instructor Grumman who believed you were going to apologize (for what?). Hopefully, he won’t actually double check if you went through with it, because you have no intention of apologizing for a single damn thing. Your aim is far more sinister than that. Today is the first step of a plan that will take you a long while, but it’ll pay off eventually. You’re going to achieve your goal. 
That is, if he agrees.
The universe is on your side, because you don’t even need to go all the way to his office. There he is, in the flesh, talking to a blonde man you recognize as Captain Erwin Smith and a woman who you haven’t seen before. Maybe if he hadn’t been so callous yesterday, you’d have waited until he was away from his comrades before approaching him. It’s too late to care about appearances now.
You step up to the three of them and salute, clearing your throat.
He looks at you, and his eyes harden when he sees a smile plastered on your face yet again. 
“Can we help you?” Captain Erwin says gently, but there’s just the slightest edge in his tone. Clearly one is not supposed to just approach this dream team. Your bad.
You open your mouth to answer him, but Lieutenant Levi beats you to it, looking bored as he does. “She’s lost, Erwin. Classes are on the other side of the base,” he says dismissively, waving a hand like he’s swatting away a fly.
“I am not lost. Sir.” Your spine is still straightened and your fist is still balled against your heart. You’re not sacrificing it just yet, but you’re certainly sacrificing your pride here. “I have a request for you. After you pointed out my obvious flaws yesterday, I realized that if I don’t get help, I’m going to fall seriously behind.”
Captain Erwin shoots him an exasperated look, already having figured that his best friend (or whatever they are to each other) must have done something to you. Meanwhile, the woman cackles, nudging the lieutenant’s shoulder. 
“She’s being proactive! You appreciate that, don’t you, Levi?”
He doesn’t answer. His attention is now exclusively on you - you nearly feel special. 
“So what do you need from me, Cadet?” You ignore the way your stomach flip-flops violently from the way he stares at you, the corners of his mouth twitched upward in a light smirk. Something in him clearly enjoys the idea of you needing him for something. Something else to lord over your head, something else for him to be cocky about. “You want me to find someone to give you private lessons?”
“Close,” you say, mustering the brightest and happiest fucking expression you can, “I’d like you to give me private lessons. I want you to train me.”
The lieutenant’s eyes flash upwards. 
Your hair is neatly tied up in a tight bun.
Y’all have no idea how weird it is to write “Lieutenant Levi.” I loathe it.
Also, this is my first time writing in second person. Lots of firsts here, folks.
Please review, your comments are my source of life.
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Note
re: your last ask about the time travel shenanigans—holy fuck yes please more of this. like, not only is it funny as hell, which i appreciate, but it's also a. more c!thomas and b. points to just how interestingly both the plot and characters of this series have grown over the years and i am ALL for it
"Janus!" is the first thing Thomas exclaims when he sees the Side Formerly Known Exclusively As Deceit rise up where Logan would usually stand. Which just might be a mistake, if Janus’s expression is anything to go by.
Okay, in Thomas's defence -
This is a really, really weird day, even by his standards. Because, like, Logan's currently standing in front of the stairs, and that's not where Logan's supposed to be, and his shirt and tie are all wrong. And had had been grinning. Openly. He had been openly grinning when Thomas had first woken up and looked in his wardrobe and realized that his favorite t-shirt apparently doesn't exist anymore and all his clothes are a half-size smaller than he's used to but also they still fit and - okay, no, back to Logan. He'd gone downstairs and tripped over a chair that wasn't supposed to be there and called out Logic. And he'd been about to ask him what's going on and why everything feels so off and also why Logan's standing in Virgil's usual spot instead of over to the right of the stairs. But then he'd noticed all the aforementioned Very Weird Clothing Things. And he'd stopped and said, "Uh, Logan?" and Logan's grin had dropped and he'd stared at Thomas for a full ten seconds then whispered, "what the fuck," with great emotion.
And then Patton had shown up with a ridiculous amount of pun-riddled cheerfulness that Thomas had been able to clock as sixty-percent fake within about half a second. And his clothes had been all wrong, too, and after a lot of confused, borderline-incomprehensible yelling at each other, Roman had showed up and added to the chaos.
"I am scared and confused and on the verge of completely losing it!" Thomas had declared at some point, which had been the cue for an ominous music sting somewhere to Thomas's right that made everybody jolt in terrified unison.
"Did somebody say scared and confused and on the verge of completely losing it?"
"Virgil, thank god!" Thomas had practically yelled, and just about thrown himself across the room to get to him - before pausing midway and allowing his brain to process... wrong hoodie. Wrong amount of eyeshadow. "Wait. No, hang on, is this - "
"FUCKING WHO," Virgil shrieked, leaping backwards half a flight of stairs, which had led to another round of confused yelling, with Thomas trying to assure them all that he's fine he hasn't had some sort of strange head injury or whatever, he's just really happy to see Virgil and no of course that's not weird, what do you mean who's Virgil, that's Virgil right over there, Roman please put down that sword things are already out of hand -
And at some point Thomas had got it into his head that the most reasonable course of events was to summon the one person who always seems to know everything that everybody else doesn't, which brings everything up to speed, more or less. Roman had gone, "Thomas, what are you doing," and Thomas, feeling slightly manic at this point, had said, "I'm trying to summon a demon, obviously," because the best way to get hold of a certain someone probably is blatant lying, and boom, instant Janus.
"Jeee-sus Christ on a cookie-shaped canoe, what is he doing here?!"
"Janus!"
So, Janus pops up, he looks literally the same as he always has (except maybe with shorter hair? Wait, they all have shorter hair, including Thomas, wait a second -) with his half-snake-face and his hat and gloves that cosy-looking capelet of his. And although his expression reflects faint bewilderment and that very particular 'wait, what' emotion that results in being pulled abruptly away from something you were busy with, he looks so normal that Thomas thinks for a moment he might be the only sane person left.
But then Janus makes a series of start-and-stop noises of incomprehension, and gestures wildly towards Virgil, who's crouched midway up on the stairs behind Logan, looking like a cornered wild animal, and snaps, "Why for the love of everything that's holy would you tell him my name?"
"You think this is me?" Virgil retorts, hands going up to grab desperately at the bars lining the side of the staircase. "I don't understand anything that's going on! He somehow knows my name! He's - he's being nice to me!"
It suddenly occurs to Thomas that this might just possibly be a time travel sort of thing. It would explain the clothes shift. And the altered layout of his house. And the fact that when he'd checked his phone this morning it had told him it was 2016, and also it hadn't been his phone, it had been the one he'd broken a few years ago in a tragic piano-moving-related accident.
...Okay, yeah, this is absolutely a time travel thing.
"Is somebody going to explain why Thomas ruined all of our heartfelt name reveal moments in one fell swoop?" Roman demands. "I thought we agreed we were going to do them gradually and draw them out as long as possible for dramatic effect!"
"I agreed to none of that," Virgil snaps from his position halfway up the stairs.
"Yes," says Logan, "yes, I think we all would like to know what's going on. Thomas? What's going on?"
"Uh - " Thomas, who has just come to a rather startling realization about time travel and also about how shitty his Sides' taste in costumes were pre-wardrobe change, doesn't really have a prepared answer for this. "I have... I am - I just - "
Thomas struggles for words. Really struggles. And everyone's just standing there, watching him with expressions that range from terror to confusion to suspicion, and they all look so weirdly young in a way that's hard to pin down. It's the clothes. It's probably the clothes, or maybe it's the way they hold themselves. Roman, carelessly confident, without a doubt in the world. Patton, still wearing a fixed dad-grin, politely baffled and looking back and forth. Logan, who hasn't been systematically beaten down and pushed back over the course of many, many years. Virgil, who's basically just a ball of grey-and-black anger and acerbic anger at this point. Janus, who's... Janus. Who's looking at him in a way that Janus has never looked at him before.
And Remus is probably lurking somewhere in the back of his mind, too, doing whatever Remus does, and - would Remus be any different now, four years prior? Thomas hadn't had any significant problems with intrusive thoughts, not back then... or, well, back now. Maybe he's calmer, maybe Thomas could actually talk with him. Try to work something out, try to understand.
But wait, he's still got to give the Sides right here and right now an answer.
Hm.
...Thomas has been through a lot in the past four years. Not, like, fantasy protagonist a lot, but more like a extended psychological journey of self-discovery and mental health crises. Now, he wouldn't trade any of this for the world, because he's learned a hell of a lot about himself in the process - but also? The Sides have put him through a lot of horrifying realization-type things.
Which is why he absolutely one hundred percent deserves to do what he's about to do next.
"I," says Thomas, with an extraordinary amount of confidence and self-assuredness, "am psychic."
And the dead silence holds. Now even Patton is staring at him in disbelief. Janus has graduated into outright horror, his face twisted up into a oh god no I am somehow responsible for letting him delude himself this far expression.
"Thomas!" Roman gasps, almost instantly lighting up with genuine enthusiasm. "Oh, Thomas, I'm so proud, we've been working on this for years. Tell me, does this extend to telekinesis, or just somehow knowing all our names and nothing else?"
"What?" Janus says. "What - no. No, you can't seriously be going along with this - what? That... what? That doesn't even make any sense?" He turns wildly from left to right, and - okay, it's very enjoyable to see him out of his depth, to be perfectly honest. Thomas likes Janus a lot, knows he has his best interests at heart, but the whole courtroom thing had been a major dick move. This is satisfying. "Are any of you getting this? Does anyone here understand what's going on?"
"I'm psychic," Thomas repeats doggedly. "I acquired magical psychic powers and now I know all of your names and tragic backstories. Surprise! I unlocked my full potential and the ninety-percent of my brain power that I wasn't using."
"That's - that's a widely-perpetuated and wildly incorrect myth," Logan says weakly.
"Nope. Turns out it's true, and I was only using ten percent of it, and now that I've gone full big-brain, I know that Patton's repressing all his bad feelings because he doesn't want to bother anyone with them, Virgil acts all scary and menacing because he thinks it's the only way that I'll ever listen to him, and Janus is secretly a huge dork with a heart of gold - uh, yellow, I guess."
"How dare you," Janus breathes, looking horrified.
"Wha - " Patton suddenly looks very pale indeed.
"Also, Roman, you're my hero; Logan, please never stop smiling like that ever again, it's literally my favorite thing in the world and if you ever stop being enthusiastic about teaching me things I will cry - and Virgil, I love you."
Virgil lets out a choked little noise like he's just been punched directly in the stomach.
"I love all of you," Thomas adds, an afterthought. "I never say that enough. Janus, that goes for you as well. You're right, I need to take care of myself more."
"I'm - " Janus is still looking around at everyone in complete disbelief, but now his gaze fixes onto Thomas, his eyes wide. "I'm what?"
Thomas is now on a roll. An extremely cathartic sort of roll. "And Remus -"
Everybody immediately panics. Virgil and Logan's hands both immediately leap up to clasp over their mouths, which seems to be a reflexive reaction on Janus's behalf. Patton lets out a deranged-sounding high pitched giggle that edges into genuine hysteria.
"Brother? What brother? I don't know what a brother is!" Roman says loudly. "I've never had a brother in my life! Thomas, your glorious psychic powers are malfunctioning. Have you tried turning them off and turning them on again?"
" - I'm not going to lie and say I love him, but -" Thomas stops abruptly, and staggers  backwards to catch himself on the couch as a thought strikes him out of literally nowhere. "Son of a bitch -"
"Does being psychic make you swear a lot?" Patton asks weakly. "Because, uh. Not sure I like this side of you, kiddo - "
"Logan," says Thomas. "Logan, what's the date today? This is so, so important, what's the date."
"It's... October," Logan says, very slowly. "October twentieth. 2016?"
"Holy shit," Thomas whispers, and then says it louder, "holy shit. Okay, listen. I was going to sort out all of our collective psychological issues in one impressive emotional speedrun, but I've realized we have something much more important to do." He pauses, and takes in a very deep, shuddering breath. "Guys. We can save Vine. Excuse me. I've just realized I’ve got to make a lot of calls."
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eyesfixedonthesun22 · 3 years
Text
You Oughta Know
Summary: Bucky helps you get over a breakup. Pairing: Bucky x Female Reader Warning(s): Smut 18+, Public Sex, Revenge Acts, Cheating (just mentioned, acts not by main characters) Word Count: 1,629 Beta Reader: @supersoldiersruined-me​ Notes: The petty level of reader and Bucky is fun to write about as fiction but like...don’t actually do this. It’s all inspired by the song You Oughta Know by Alanis Morissette.
“I see you started without me, killer.”
There’s a quick clink as the metal from his hand collides with the bottle of bourbon he’s snatched out from under you. Bucky slides into the stool next to you.
“Don’t take this the wrong way but you look like shit. Not the hot, probably leads a rugged lifestyle as a secret assassin, looks like shit, but the real looks like shit.”
“So I look like shit?”
“Yes!” he says, matching your mock sarcasm after taking a pull directly off the bottle.
“One, fuck you. Two, I’m also living that rugged secret assassin lifestyle just like you. Three,  I have a reason to look like shit.”
“You didn’t have a mission. You and Nat don’t go back out East for another month.” He flags the bartender down. “Whatever your largest plate of tater tots is, can you double that and smother it in cheese and bacon? Think tater tot poutine and you’re on the right track. I’m willing to pay, my good man.”
On any other day you’d tease him. The bartenders here had gotten pretty used to Bucky’s odd requests and the both of you blowing off mission steam at the karaoke stage. Instead of playfully ribbing your best friend, you lay on the bar and a single long sob tears through you.
“What the fuck!?” While the words were anything but, his tone is tender and concerned. “Sweetheart, what the hell is going on. I’ve seen you cry less when you’ve taken a bullet to the leg.”
“Tom broke up with me.”
You pry your head up from the bar sticky from years of ethanol sugar spills and lord knows what else to study his face. All things considered, he keeps control. It didn’t take any of your deductive skills to know that Bucky (and the entire team) had despised the man. That should have been your first clue.
“There was another woman.”
The next couple pulls from the bottle burn a bit less and have you feeling the type of mellow you’d sought when you’d texted Bucky for a night out. Your good feeling is interrupted by him plopping what looks to be at least six different guns on the bar, eight knives, and perhaps two frag grenades.
“Where’s his apartment, doll. I’ll be ready in two.”
“Dude, what the fuck!” The plate full of cheesy potatoes nearly slides off the bar as the bartender stares wide eyed at Bucky’s splayed arsenal. “We’ve talked about this, man.”
“Special circumstances, my friend. Slide me the ketchup, please.” You study your friend with a raised brow while he continues to appraise his ammo levels and take stock. “I’ll be ready in five. I didn’t account for the poutine.”
***
You’d managed, with great difficulty, to talk Bucky down from murder as he shoveled the poutine in his face.
“He can’t just get away with treating you like this?!”
You shrug a shoulder before waiving for another drink. You knew Bucky was right. Tom shouldn’t get to treat you like this. You’d been nothing but a supportive partner to him. He’s the one who has a laundry list of issues.
Your fingers play with the delicate blade of one of Bucky’s knives still strewn about the bartop; flipping it expertly through your favorite routine.
You’re unsure who can claim credit for dissuading Bucky from murdering Tom. It was likely a healthy mix of a carb coma, the two bottles of whiskey he’d knocked back himself (no doubt spiked with something Asguardian, and the unyielding pull towards the karaoke stage. Regardless, the night of laughter and drinks with your best friend seemed to be exactly what you needed to take your mind off things. You nearly threw a tantrum when you heard the bartender yell last call.
“Let’s go home and keep this party going, darling?”
“You read my mind, Buck.”
***
In traditional drunk fashion, the two of you get sidetracked stumbling and giggling on your way back to the compound. You’re certainly not alone on the ever busy city streets, but then again Bucky had a way of making you feel better than you thought possible.
“Hold on!” you slur mildly. “I’m gonna call that motherfucker and give him a piece of my mind.”
Normally Bucky would have been the voice of reason but he too was firmly intoxicated and more than willing to cuss your ex out. Without hesitation he smooshes himself behind you into the phonebooth you had already jumped into.
“Hey Tom, ya fuckface. I want you to know that I am happy for you, I wish nothing but the best for you both. Looks like you finally have someone who deserves you...another piece of shit human. I saw her picture, Tom. Do you not realize she’s just an older version of me. Does she speak eloquently? What the fuck did she do that I-”
The line clicks open and you freeze.
“Hello?” Tom asks into the phone. Bucky can see the pure terror in your eyes, slicing through the drunken bold stupor. “How are you doing?”
Your throat feels as though someone made you swallow sandpaper. You were ready to rant to an answering machine, but somehow hearing his voice made you feel stone cold sober. Before you can formulate a complete thought, the phone is yanked from your hands.
“You don’t get to ask how she’s doing. 'Cause the love that she gave, that you two made wasn't enough for you. And every time you speak her name I hope you’re filled with a feeling of immense regret because you’re never getting her back.”
“Oh please, like I want that heartless bitch back.”
“I'm here, to remind you of the mess you left when you went away. It's not fair to deny her of the cross she bears. YOU gave it to her. You oughta know.”
***
You’re hungover. The movie theater in the compound is a welcome refuge of darkness and quiet. So much so that by the second scene you’re softly snoring away in the seat next to Bucky.
Perfect.
He shimmys (not without difficulty) onto the floor in front of you on his knees and begins to pull the soft sweatpants down from the curve of your hips. So engrossed in his work he doesn’t notice your eyes flutter open until the cold steel of your glock is against his temple.
“What the fuck are you doing, Barnes?!”
“We talked about this, doll! Last night.” His limbs are perfectly still, hands resting on the soft warm skin in the small of your back.
***
You struggle to think back to the fuzzy details of last night after the horrific events in the phone booth. Bucky had held you close as you sobbed once more on the walk back home. You’d collapsed into bed without regard to your usual routine. You vaguely remembered Bucky saying “Don’t ya know babe, the best way to get over someone is to get under someone new.”
“Honestly I just need someone to eat me out like it’s their last meal on earth.”
The entire exchange had made you snort laugh just before dozing off.
***
“I remember. You said someone should do this for me.”
“I’m a someone.” Only the sounds of the movie play in the background otherwise he could swear he would be able to hear you think. He risks a glance at your face and there is the expression he’d been waiting for. Pleading. Curiosity. Permission. “I want to do this for you. You deserve it, sweetheart.”
With the gun no longer aimed, but rather scraping against his scalp while your hands fumble, he dives into the uncharted water with his best friend. He knows your stubborn resignation refuses to let you just drop the weapon all together. You need to think that you’re not one hundred percent as curious as he is. Inching your pants and panties the rest of the way down, he kisses each new inch of exposed skin.
You clench your nondominant hand in his hair, dominant hand still holding the glock. The occasional tap of the cool metal against Bucky’s skin should annoy him, piss him off, make him stop or tell you to set it down but he doesn't. It makes him laugh somewhere deep down that his best friend and secret agent is getting devoured in a movie theatre and can’t form a complete enough thought to set down her weapon. The other part of him is straining against his jeans knowing that at any moment you can kick his ass and press that back up against his temple. Your strength has always terrified him and turned him on a little and he would never want it any different.
You feel as though someone has turned you inside out and every nerve ending is exposed and vulnerable. Your brain is no longer focused on the terrifying fact that your best friend is seeing you on display. Instead all you can feel are the sparks of pleasure from each lick, suck, and swirl. When he enters two digits deep and presses steady rhythmic pressure you explode. It’s a good thing the theatre was empty besides the two of you. There was no way you would have been able to stifle the deep primal sounds escaping from your lips.
You throw your arms off to the side as you recover. “Holy fuck, Barnes.”
“Told you.”
“Yeah but if anyone finds out, I’ll actually have to use this on you,” you gesture to your gun still hanging limply in your hand.
Taking advantage of your still jelly-boned state, Bucky easily disarms you. With a devilish grin and chuckle he drags the gun down your still exposed core making you shudder. “You sure about that, doll?”
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