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#I tried to find 18 versions actually
unbidden-yidden · 3 months
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Jewish Song of the Day #18: Am Yisrael Chai
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Happy Chai day!!! We made it to day 18!!!
Am Yisrael Chai basically translates out to "The Jewish People Live," and is a significant phrase because of just how many times people have tried to kill the whole Jewish people.
The original R. Shlomo Carlebach version popularized the phrase as a song a lot more recently than folks might realize, but the sentiment dates back ages. The specific phrase is said to have originated with a British Jewish army chaplain who reportedly called it out at the liberation of Bergen-Belsen after World War II.
There are several versions that I enjoy, but this version has the cute and funny story intro that reminded me of this cross-cultural conversation, so it won.
For those who do not know, 18 is a special number in Judaism, because it represents life and living. This is because every Hebrew letter also has a numeric value, and the Hebrew word for "life" is "chai" / חי and the letters that make it up have the numeric value of 18.
There are many things that one could say about this song, but the bottom line from my perspective is this: it's a celebration of the fact that the people who have tried to kill us off?
They have always failed.
They will, I"YH always fail.
עם ישראל חי!
Here's the one that started it all:
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Bonus versions:
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duchessonfire · 2 years
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I have been reading a bit on the OTW elections and the whole Tiffany G thing, but most of all, I've been reading comments from people supporting Tiffany saying that she just wants to clear AO3 from all the CSAM (child sexual abuse material) content and I don't know who needs to hear this but:
If someone comes to a predominantly QUEER space (like AO3) and tells you that censorship is necessary to eradicate CSAM... it's not actually CSAM they want to eradicate...
I've seen this type of discourse about Pride and about queer literature and queer movies and queer communities. It's a tried and true technique of the right and conservative movements.
First, they say there is a DANGER to the community through CSAM and they conflate the actual threat of CSAM in the community (we all know someone who thinks that writing a love story between two characters who are 16 is CSAM...), and make you believe that censorship is the only way to PROTECT THE CHILDREN. And since most people are (rightly) mind-bogled at having to explain that of course they don't support CSAM content, they bow down and accept the censorship for the greater good, without anyone actually trying to have a conversation about what qualifies as CSAM (which needs to, you know, actually involve real children and not fictional characters who are 17 and losing their virginity with their crush in a Mature-rated story about high school football and first love based on the author's own experience of losing their virginity at 17 to their crush in high school).
Then, they tell you that there are other forms of DISTURBING CONTENT, and what they really mean is porn that THEY find disturbing, for ex, (and I kid you not, I have seen comments like that) porn featuring disabled characters, which they consider to encourage the exploitation of vulnerable individuals, or BDSM porn (which supposedly encourages violence and lack of consent), or rough porn, or any kind of porn that isn't two (preferably white and skinny) able-bodied people doing it missionary style while lovingly gazing in each other's eyes. SO TO PROTECT VIEWERS, that needs to be banned as well.
And then, they tell you that even that sanitized version of porn is still porn and that people under 18 or under 21 or under whatever age they consider too young to view anything sexual regardless of the fact that not all countries have the same law about the age of maturity, should be free to surf the site without having to *gasp* filter out properly tagged works. So TO PROTECT THE CHILDREN, every explicit content is censored.
And then finally, when all that is left is a sanitized, white-washed, ableist, puritan type of content featuring General-Audience approved gay works of two nice men or two nice women holding hands and chastely kissing each other on the lips... Well guess what? :) CHILDREN SHOULD NOT BE EXPOSED TO QUEER CONTENT SO WE NEED TO BAN THAT AS WELL, and since we've basically done purge after purge before and there are still a handful of people on the website, well surely they won't mind/care anymore, will they?
It's not just a slippery slope, it's something that has been done time and again, and that is why censorship on AO3 will never, never have a positive outcome.
Thank you for coming to my TED talk.
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luciddownloading · 2 months
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Tarot Reading (Pick A Card): Your Future Romantic Partner 💚
Good morning/afternoon/evening. Whenever you find this! Today, we are going to be doing a reading on your future romantic partner. Pretty self-explanatory! I will first interpret who this person might be. It could be someone already in your life, someone you're in separation with or even someone you haven't met yet. As always, listen to your intuition. Then, I will go into what this connection will be like.
If you are wanting more, you can join my Patreon page to get the special 18+ extended reading! We will delve into the sexual aspects of this connection as well as channeled messages from this person. I have been channeling some beautifully intimate and loving energy in the extended. So, that's something you might want to check out!
It's possible that a fraction of you are already going to be with this person in a committed relationship but most of you won't be. Also, per usual, I won't be taking reversals today. I actually tried to at first but the energy didn't feel right.
Choose the image below that you're most drawn to and then keep reading to see what your future romantic partnership will be like! (It is possible, of course, to be drawn to more than one. Maybe there are two different relationships you need to hear about. This knows no time limits!)
PILE 1
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PILE 2
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PILE 3
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PILE 4
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PILE 1
WHO ARE THEY?
King of Wands
King of Cups
Two of Pentacles (back of the deck)
Okay, Pile 1, this is obviously someone with a ton of masculine energy. If you couldn't tell! But, when they enter into this relationship with you, they're going to be more balanced than they have been in the past. I get the feeling that you've known them for a while or seen them at a less evolved version of themselves. To be with you, they need to be in their King energy. And it doesn't matter if they're a guy or a gal. They will have matured into a better version of themselves. So, if there's someone you're thinking of who you feel you wouldn't want to be with, based on their past behavior, try not to judge them on their former self. That song Dead and Gone by T.I. and Justin Timberlake just started in my head. "The old me is dead and gone!"
It's funny because that's not too obvious here. Like I don't see Death or Judgement or a card that would indicate that. Maybe you're not at all expecting that they've changed or grown and this is going to take you by surprise. If there's history here, whatever happened moved them into a big room in the old doghouse. Lol or maybe you just decided you outgrew them. But, they took the time to straighten themselves out. They had to get their affairs in order, ground themselves, feel more centered or stable. OR they had to learn how to balance their fiery, fun side with their sensitive, understanding side. I'm getting one or the other: either they were all fire and little sensitivity or they were so vulnerable and overwhelmed that they couldn't - for lack of a better term - find their balls.
In the past, they may have hurt you by either being insensitive and emotionally unavailable, lacking that King of Cups energy, or unable to take action or be brave enough to be with you, not standing on their King of Wands business. Either of these modes may have caused them to choose something/someone else over you. They definitely either have personal placements in Fire (Aries, Leo, Sagittarius) or Water (Cancer, Scorpio, Pisces) or both, for many of you. I get the impression that they're very fit, very attractive. Definitely a nice body! They know how to hold court and be the center of attention or life of the party. When they want to. Yet, they can also be shy or introverted at times. The main message I am getting here is that you are seeing them in either one extreme or the other: an unbalanced version of either the King of Cups or King of Wands. But, giving this relationship a chance will allow you to see them in a more accurate light.
WHAT WILL THIS RELATIONSHIP BE LIKE?
Seven of Pentacles
Queen of Swords
Page of Wands
The Star (back of the deck)
The way this relationship starts is by this person wanting you. BADLY. Not in a psychotic way. It's just that they will be manifesting you in. I definitely feel like this will start as the end of a separation of some kind. And you probably established that situation. I see you as this Queen of Swords and you just "noped" right out of whatever was going on with you and them. I feel like it's a forgivable offense but you also have to decide whether or not you want them back. The power is yours. What are you going to do with that sword of yours? Are you going to slay them like Uma Thurman in Kill Bill or put the sword down? Kill Bill, the SZA song, may have significant lyrics to this situation.
You have definitely been in "fuck them" mode before this starts, to some degree. So, yes, this definitely feels like, well, not an actual ex like SZA is singing about but someone who had you all in your feelings. And you had to make a logical choice about them somehow. And you're still going to feel the need to view them logically, to not give them too much leeway. And they are going to work hard to prove to you that they're legit and can be trusted. "You're on probation" is what you tell them as this starts. One wrong move and they're out because you don't have time. And you know what? I love that for you!
It's so funny because I am getting more about this "probational period" in the beginning of the connection than how it will play out as a whole. And that's because you will want to be smart and not get too swept up in the moment. You will take it step by step and they will be happy to match that energy. I think they will just be happy that you're giving them a chance. I can tell that the sex will be awesome. (So, your extended reading will be juicy!) But, I think that won't matter as much to you, especially if you've already had sex with them prior to being officially together. And be honest: you find them hot as fuck. But, as physically attracted as you are to them, you are going to insist on being level-headed about the relationship.
I just heard "so you don't do anything stupid." Whatever choices you made regarding them before, you may either judge yourself harshly for or get SUPER embarrassed by. Like that level of cringe that makes you want to crawl out of your skin. But, be easy on yourself. That was part of the lesson you had to learn! And forgiving yourself may make it easier to forgive this person. I do think that having a positive relationship with this person will be incredibly healing because of that past pain. It's possible to move past all of that and create something beautiful with this individual. If you want to! That's a matter of free will. Deep down, you do want something great with this person. Don't let grudges or resentments prevent you from seeing that.
A few things I wanted to add: This person will see as you SO special and amazing. You will be a very powerful light in their life and may even be a catalyst to their spiritual awakening. You could have Aquarius placements or something important could happen in this relationship during Aquarius season. Also, during your separation, they will be looking you up online a lot and stalking your social media, maybe even unbeknownst to you, especially if they're blocked or you have a hard-to-find account.
Join me on Patreon to access the extended reading, which will be 18+, discussing the sexual aspects of this connection, as well as channeled messages from this person.
EXTENDED READING FOR PILE 1
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PILE 2
WHO ARE THEY?
The World
Four of Swords
King of Pentacles (back of the deck)
Pile 2, I get the feeling that isn't just going to be any old relationship. This is going to be MAJOR. You probably already know who this is. But, if you don't, you're going to know. It is going to hit you when you meet them, hard, like a speeding train. But, in a good way lol. This is definitely soulmate energy, maybe even twin flame, if you resonate with that label. If you do, your person definitely does as well. In fact, this might be the type of connection to get you to believe in such things when you didn't before.
For some of you, this person might already have one or more children when you meet. But, take that as it resonates. They might be coming out of either a divorce or the ending of a major relationship as soon as you meet. This could be with the mother or father of their child. Also, for a select few of you, this could be someone that you spent time apart from while they were building their family: getting married, having kids. Now, after leaving their partner, they are available. In any case, this individual is ending some major cycle when you come together, which has prepared them for this new chapter with you.
I am picking up on the Fixed signs: Taurus, Leo, Scorpio, Aquarius. There is an extra emphasis on Taurus as the King of Pentacles also represents Earth signs: Taurus, Virgo, Capricorn. So, this individual could have personal placements in Taurus. They are also giving me more of a masculine energy, regardless of their gender. They are very comfortable being "the provider" and a message is coming through that this is also a source of insecurity. Maybe they take on too much pressure or responsibility (and have from an early age) or they worry that people, especially romantic partners, use them for their money. They are financially secure and abundant in some way. Their job pays well. There is also something kind of "thick" about them. If they're a woman, they may be voluptuous and if they're male, they may have a stockier or wider build.
I also think they will feel a sweet kind of relief being with you. For one, you are not materialistic and don't care about the money they make or being totally taken care of. You just like them for them which might be a slightly different experience because they always feel like people are attracted to them for what they can do or provide, for their usefulness. Yeah, some of them definitely have Capricorn energy. Venus in Capricorn, specifically, for a few. But, you see THEM as the valuable thing. I am getting the song The Way I Are by Timbaland which is funny because the verses describe someone who is the opposite of this energy: broke. Lol but the chorus is about not needing to spend money to express affection. Overall, I think being with you will be a relaxing change of pace, which is part of why they will fall for you. They might even compare you to their previous partner in that sense. For some of you, this connection might become a commitment while their divorce is being finalized or a child custody battle is going on. So, their connection with you could be a healing reprieve from all of that.
WHAT WILL THE RELATIONSHIP BE LIKE?
Page of Wands
The Lovers
Wheel of Fortune
Knight of Cups (back of the deck)
Pile 2, you are really going to bring out the romantic in this person. Before you, the romance had died in their life in a way. Everything was about utility and practicality and what was expected. Your person has a very traditional nature and that sometimes causes them to suppress their true passions or what's going on in their heart. For some of you, this relationship may actually inspire them to pursue a creative passion that they'd always loved but forgot about in order to pay the bills or "be an adult". It also could be a passion that you're pursuing as well. In any case, life will get a lot more exciting for this person once they're with you.
You inspire great passion in them in the, ahem, physical way. This is another pile where I can tell the extended is going to be very saucy. I do feel like their sexual attraction to you will be a big draw toward you for them. However, it definitely won't be their sole motivation. And since they are more traditional-minded, they probably won't be willing to jump in bed right away. In spite of everything they are feeling toward you! There may be times, in the beginning, where the horny part of them just wants to bang while the more restrained part of them insists on courting you or getting to know you first. But, even when they are holding back, they are full of desire for you. This will be true even in every day situation or public settings.
Something I also wanted to mention is that this relationship might have quite a few starts and stops. I say that because I had to actually pause this reading because my device wasn't acting right and start again later, which never happens to me. So, there is a very fated element to this connection and it seems like the Universe will have its way. And, because of that, there could be delays or things not happening when you expect or want. This person will have their hands full with their personal/family affairs, so that's a big reason why. But, it is also meant to come together and you both know this. You will feel especially lucky for having found one another and that will provide more incentive to make it work.
Join me on Patreon to access the extended reading, which will be 18+, discussing the sexual aspects of this connection, as well as channeled messages from this person.
EXTENDED READING FOR PILE 2
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PILE 3
WHO ARE THEY?
King of Swords
Five of Pentacles
Five of Cups (back of the deck)
Pile 3, I definitely feel like this is someone you already know. There could currently be a separation going on with them or just a situation where they are not getting much attention from you. Yet, you are only treating them the same way they have treated you. Once again, I am sensing a Divine Masculine individual. This makes sense because most people in a reader's collective end up being Divine Feminines, especially since most readers are very feminine (including me). But, take it as it resonates! I am sure some masculines are hanging out here, too. And, of course, those labels are dependent on energy, not gender or sexual orientation. Anyway, this is a very masculine individual, I feel, with a significant Air influence (Gemini, Libra, Aquarius). They live in their mental body and are not good at expressing their emotions.
That doesn't mean they don't have feelings, though! No matter how they may portray themselves, they are actually very sensitive. Many of them have very expressive eyes that always give their emotions away, often when they're not even saying anything. This person, at the moment, could have alienated you with their lack of emotional expression. I don't think they conveyed the truth of their feelings to you. For some of you, they did everything they could to act nonchalant or distant or like they didn't see anything more with you. I can understand that leaving a bad taste in your mouth. But, maybe you can try to not hold that against them.
The thing is that they put you in the position of seeking out their love. This definitely feels like it was a runner/chaser thing, with you being the chaser. I always joke and say that the Five of Pentacles gives me Oliver Twist energy. The part where he's begging for more soup at the orphanage. "Please, sir, can I have some more??" That's the energy you were in with them. It wasn't desperate but it was maybe a bit overeager or anxious or hurt. Now, I feel like you've pulled your energy back and good for you! You're focusing on yourself and now they are the ones begging for more proverbial soup. Well, this person plays it too cool to beg. But, inwardly, they are now tormented by your very brief texts, your slow response times, or maybe even your radio silence.
I feel like nothing has officially ended here. It's just on ice. Now, you're probably saying, "Why is this my next relationship??" Well, I hear you but keep an open mind. Maybe this is an experience you needed. To teach you to not chase or plead for love, to let it naturally come to you. It was a lesson. And if you're laying back and leaving it to this person to now put in the effort, good. That's what you both need. They really, really regret being so distant and not being available for you. It's up to you to give them another chance. But, I have to say that their lesson lies in being present and emotionally available. They've got some shit to work out before you get together and I think financial issues play a major role. In fact, they might have been holding back partly because of that. This person is deeply insecure and that really gets in their way. They struggle with feeling not good enough, especially for you, but also know they will forever regret it if they don't at least try here.
WHAT WILL THE RELATIONSHIP BE LIKE?
Four of Cups
King of Cups
The Hierophant
Four of Wands (back of the deck)
Okay, just in general, I really love the energy of this reading overall. Some really powerful and beautiful connections are coming through in all of the piles. This feels like another soulmate/divine counterpart situation. And I wouldn't just say that! But, these kinds of connections can also get messy and confusing, as both people can trigger the other and act out their issues in very chaotic ways. I have to say that your person did not mean to hurt you. I would never excuse something seriously toxic or even abusive. In this situation, they were just guarded or self-sabotaging. It is absolutely your free will, though, to decide whether to be with them or not. If not, they would totally understand.
Your person is actually a real sweetheart, underneath it all, because they are just forever going to regret how they treated you, even if you do end up together. Even if you forgive them, it's going to be especially hard for them to forgive themselves. But, that's just their insecurity. Before you end up in a relationship with them, you will not realize just how much, how deeply, they seek to commit to you. This person wants it all with you: marriage, kids, the happily ever after. I think they daydream about all of that a lot, including a wedding day. Maybe they have been to a wedding recently and got very emotional because they thought of you. But, the heaviness of their feelings is a big part of why they run from them. They're very indecisive and they're going to have to get over that. I am getting the song Hot N Cold by Katy Perry, especially since there is a wedding scene in the video.
In this pile, I am being told more about what's going to lead to the relationship or make it happen. And it can't happen if this person is lying around, feeling sorry for themselves or unable to make up their minds. To be with you, they are being challenged to step into their King of Cups energy: to be unafraid of their feelings, to follow their intuition over logic, to embrace emotional intimacy. They need to realize, especially if they are a man, that being vulnerable and emotionally open is not a weakness and does not make them less than.
Their sensitive side is a more authentic version of themselves and I think you will find that wildly attractive. I do sense that they will come back in as a pretty radically different person. But, the difference will be that they will actually show you the real them and make it much easier to establish a commitment. For some reason, Spirit doesn't want to share too many details about the relationship because you are meant to go with the flow. So, we'll see what the extended says! One thing I will say, though, is don't be surprised if you blink and you're engaged or married. If you want that! But, I feel like a lot of you could also easily see yourself marrying this person, even if you have never really thought about marriage before. It could happen rather fast and if that feels right to you, your Guides are telling you to not judge it. If it's right, it's right!
Join me on Patreon to access the extended reading, which will be 18+, discussing the sexual aspects of this connection, as well as channeled messages from this person.
EXTENDED READING FOR PILE 3
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PILE 4
Eight of Cups
The Star
Strength (back of the deck)
Pile 4, this is interesting because this may not be someone you personally know yet. And I say that because you may know OF them but not actually know them. This feels like someone in the public eye, with some degree of fame or recognition. And that doesn't have to mean an award-winning actor or something (although they could be). They might be a lesser known performer or a successful model or even an influencer/Internet personality. You'll know what resonates. And I am not saying this to encourage delusions. In fact, I rarely ever give messages like this. So, it must be for you! I also think you're more skeptical of a situation like this or afraid of being delulu yourself. But, something is (or will) intuitively tell you you're going to end up with this person.
They could have either Leo or Aquarius placements (or both) in their birth chart. I feel like they are super-attractive and very popular. For many of you, this person is on the taller side. They definitely get a lot of attention in a romantic or sexual way. But, they're also not the type to take themselves too seriously. I think they are very confident and handle the spotlight well but they're balanced and level-headed. They don't have an insane ego. It's funny because I think they will be very dissatisfied with many of their options until you come along. You will stand out to them. What I am getting is that they will find out about you in some chance manner. Maybe mutual friends or peers, especially if you're in the entertainment business or in their industry. They also might stumble across you online. Leaving a seemingly random comment on their social media or sending a risky DM could be the thing that gets their attention.
And I think there is some mirroring happening in that you may feel very dissatisfied with your current options until you meet this person. You could be moving on from an ex or past romantic situation and then, boom, this happens. At first, I thought the Eight of Cups was this person's energy but I actually think it's yours. It's only when you are done with a certain someone and moving on for good that they make their way into your life. In many ways, they are manifesting you and you are manifesting them. This is honestly pretty magical! They may have their eye on you first and become very determined to make you theirs. This person knows what they want and they go after it!
WHAT WILL THE RELATIONSHIP BE LIKE?
Eight of Wands
Queen of Wands
The Hierophant
King of Swords (back of the deck)
This relationship is going to heat up very quickly. The physical attraction here is off the charts. You might try and be a bit cool with your person because everyone thirsts after them or falls over them and you don't want to seem desperate. But, you still have eyes and a pulse, so you find them VERY hot. I actually think not being overly thirsty for them will just make you stand out more to them. It will also make you come across as more genuine and like you actually like them, not the superficial stuff. The more famous or desired they are, the truer that will be.
Also, let's be clear: they find you just as hot. You are this Queen of Wands to them: alluring, magnetic, passionate, charismatic, feminine yet fierce. They will be very drawn to the confidence you exude, even if you really don't think you're that big of a deal. I am getting the message that the point of this connection is to get you to step into that Queen of Wands energy. Because, even though it's not in the spread, I am really getting King of Wands energy from this person. They've got the sauce and, even though they stay humble, they know it. And they're meant to be a mirror of you in that way so you can embrace your own sauce. Sex With Me by Rihanna is now coming through. Yes, the sex here will be fire because you're both fire. You both probably have Fire placements (Aries, Leo, Sagittarius)
I feel like this connection is truly going to happen out of nowhere! I am not being told how because it's meant to be a surprise. And if you don't even know this high-profile person and have no connections to them, you couldn't even guess how it comes about anyway. Just let it happen! But, I can see travel being a big part of this relationship. You will probably have to travel far to see them and get acquainted with new places. You might even be moving where they are. They will splurge and take you on exciting dates or trips. And they are so much fun to be around. Never a dull moment!
Yet, they will also be serious about you. The Hierophant has come out so much in this whole reading! In this pile, it shows that this isn't going to be some player. Maybe they were in the past but they are going to be ready for commitment with you. I think it's because they have had enough of the single life. They may have been very sexually active before because they had plenty options and opportunities. And I think you can relate to that! But, now, they are ready for something real and I also think you can relate to that. You also might not either expect them to be so eager to get serious or you'll be surprised by it, especially since it seems like you've dealt with immature or noncommittal options in the past. R U Mine by Arctic Monkeys might also be a resonant song. I am not necessarily seeing a quick engagement/marriage but maybe just a quick major decision, like moving to their city and in with them. It will just feel right!
This is giving power couple vibes. You are like the masculine and feminine versions of each other. You might even evolve into an It Girl or Boy in your own right while with them (but you've always been one, babe). I think people will find you a highly attractive couple. This King of Swords is sticking out to me, though, like a sore thumb. I don't feel like it's their energy. It actually feels out of place. This is someone else; that person you're going to have to leave behind to be with them. I think that'll be a very difficult decision and it will be at the back of your mind in the beginning of this situation. Tbh, you won't be completely over this past person by the time you're with this individual. But, you will gradually let them go and see that it was the right decision.
Join me on Patreon to access the extended reading, which will be 18+, discussing the sexual aspects of this connection, as well as channeled messages from this person.
EXTENDED READING FOR PILE 4
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Thanks for stopping by! You can check out other readings and posts from my blog here:
MASTER LIST
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thehighladywrites · 2 months
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— “Okay, but in what way do you love me?”
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☀︎ — pairing: tutor/nerd azriel x bimbo/ditzy reader
☀︎ — summary: It’s confession time! Last night you said you like him but over analyzing azriel needs to know exactly what “like” means.
☀︎ — warnings: 18+, mdni, smut, confessions, creampie, fluff, azriel needs clarification even though you are VERY clear
☀︎ — amara’s note: pls enjoy and lemme know what u think💗 also sorry for it being short it’s only bc i’m posting another drabble very soon, and it’s a personal favorite 👀💗
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“Why are you staring at me, Az? Is there something on my face?” you ask panicked as you grab your hand mirror on his desk and check your flawless face
Azriel's gaze softens as he speaks, “No, there's nothing on your beautiful face. I just like looking at you. And, I want to ask you something.”
You exhale calmly, pleased with your appearance, as you turn your body towards him, jewelry jangling.
His stomach feels leaden, and he feels nauseous. What if your version of "like" and his version of "like" aren't the same? What if you say you like him, but only in a friendly way?
You are miles out of his league, but he's not complaining. You actually make him happy and mushy when you call and ask him to go on little shopping trips with you, and it’s even better when you let him fuck your brains out from time to time. But he is in love, like deeply fucking in love.
“Okay. Do you recall—remember yesterday when you said you liked me? Do you want to clarify what that means? Why do you like me?”
The question makes you tilt your head in confusion, brows drawing in curiosity as you pull the strawberry-flavored lollipop from your mouth, resulting in a loud pop, lips covered in a thin layer of sticky, red residue.
“Wait, huh? What do you mean, Azzie? I don’t like you, I love you.”
Oh my fucking god, what? Okay, so he was literally about to throw the fuck up but he was a little hesitant to respond. Azriel couldn't help but think about the meaning behind your words. You were always so bubbly and affectionate, even with strangers. Did your "I love you" hold the same weight every time, or was it just another sprinkle of your charm?
“Okay, I hear you but in what way do you love me? Do you mean it as a friend or—?” He questions behind his glasses.
Azriel had, for the first time ever, brought you to his dorm. You were just laying in bed next to him but decided to straddle his lying body, smiling as his hands automatically held your thighs.
“No silly! I loooove you and I want you to be my boyfriend. You’re so hot and sweet and kind and you care about me, like a lot. Always keepin’ me outta trouble and kissing me too. You love me too tho, right?” You gaze down at him, your big doe eyes shimmering with hope, and your glossy bottom lip slightly quivering.
Love you? He was almost insanely obsessed with you. There was something about you that drove him crazy. How could he not love you? He gives you an assuring nod, all of your previous worries disappearing in an instant. “Yeah, I do. I love you too. So much.”
“That’s so adorable, gimme a kiss.” You puckered your lips, the sweet scent of your Burberry Her Elixir filling his senses.
He tries to remove his glasses, but you stop him with a swat. “No, keep ‘em on,” you insist between kisses.
To no one’s surprise you were bent over his desk, getting fucked stupid as he made you list what you loved about him.
Maybe it was a little mean since you couldn’t focus, your fuzzy brain filled with pleasure, but Azriel wanted to know anyway.
“more,” he gasps, “n-need more—gimme more, sweetheart.”
So you did, saying everything you loved about him. Every single detail.
“I love it when you make me breakfast— fuck, and—and when you carry me whenever i want. ‘m so close, az,” you sob—and then, just as his thumb finds your clit again, rubbing desperate little circles to get you over the edge, you cum — harder than ever, spasming around his cock and pulling him in as you squeeze around him.
“a-azzie,” you gasp brokenly, “fuck, ‘s good—so good.”
“you’re so perfect. prettiest girl i’ve laid my fucking eyes on —prettiest pussy ever too. i, sh-shit—” he falls into his own orgasm, hot, thick ropes of cum spilling into you with every twitch of his cock, sweet little noises pulled from his throat that he sighs into your neck, fucking his load into you.
“Holy shit,” Azriel mutters before he kisses the back of your head, the biggest trail of cum he’s ever seen leaking out of you when he pulls out.
“I wanna go again, please Az, let—let me ride. I’ll tell you more things I love,” you lock eyes with him over your shoulder, a smirk playing at your lips.
Azriel obviously doesn’t deny. He’s happy someone for once in his life wants to tell him how much they love him. Especially when that someone is his first and last girlfriend💗.
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🏷️: @ithan-holstroms-girl @whatdoyxumean @honeybeeboobaa @to-be-written @sidthedollface2 @stasiereads @andrewgarfield2022 @amara-moonlight @thescooby-gang @linoisqt @mischiefmanagers @tortured-artists @dwlyniii @scooobies @harryshoobies69 @caroline-books @kalulakunundrum @meshelleexplosionmurder @danikamariewrites @clairebear08 @redbleedingrose @jeannineee @rowaelinsdaughter @nocasdatsgay @v3lv3tf0x @liati2000 @teenageeggscissorslawyer @impossibelle @stonerpersona @dreamlandreader @djaaaa @callmeblaire @thelov3lybookworm @polli05927 @ahitsalyssa @evergreenlark @thegirlintheshadows101 @saltedcoffeescotch @acourtofladydeath @acourtofwhatthefuck @readychilledwine @daycourtofficial @azriels-shadowsinger @sapphicmsmarvel @hungryforbatboys @justasillylittlegoofyguy @luvmoo @emryb @meritxellao @mochibabycakes @artists-ally @azzieslittlebunny @viatorem-maris @berryzxx @riddlesb1tch @sweetshifter
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crushmeeren · 5 months
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Everyone in this NSFW One Shot is aged up/18+, if you have any issues with that—remember this is a work of FICTION!! so just block me & move on lmao
Warnings; cursing, teasing, dirty talk, praising, soft! dom Tamaki, breeding kink, mentions of pregnancy sex, pussy eating, fingering, vaginal sex
Note; for the lovely anon requester, I super loved writing this, I love Tamaki—the soft dom version of him hits the spot 💕🤤 also I tried really hard to make this a good soft dom, I hope I did it justice.
•••
Tamaki is, more often than not, tightly wound into a ball of nerves. Not to say he hasn’t gotten any better at being able to handle the reigns of his anxiety, because he certainly has.
It’s just, there’s always a small undercurrent of unease lingering in his belly. Skyrocketing his heart rate, making his fingers shake with adrenaline each time he gets interviewed after a villain beat down.
He’s ashamed to admit that even when he’s with friends the unsettling feeling remains, albeit only in a small amount. It lurks in the back of his mind—never truly gone completely.
That is, unless he’s with you, and now, with your baby girl too. Funnily enough, his hands were as steady as they’d ever been when he first held his sweet baby.
His heart didn’t race, he wasn’t choking to death on butterflies—okay well, those things actually were happening, but not in an oh my god the sky is falling type of way. It was in an oh my god I love my family so much I’m gonna throw up kind of way. Tamaki was drowning in his feelings for the two of you. So much so that he thought he may burst into tears (he did).
Tamaki’s sweet little Chiyoko is only two years old now, but fucking hell—he’s started to want to have another baby so goddamn badly. It clouds his mind constantly, marring his thoughts.
He wants another little one to raise, to teach them how to be better than he ever has been. Another person he can completely be himself with, who he’ll love unconditionally. Always striving to give his kids a better world than the one he grew up in.
Although, what really snapped the pathetically thin thread that was left of his patience was when he came across what must’ve been the 10th pregnant woman while out on patrol today.
All Tamaki could keep picturing was you. With your belly so cute, so swollen & round. An image pops up behind his eyelids. Your lovely face, your lower lip pushed out so sweetly in a pout, tits spilling over the top of your bra. Tamaki swallows, throat dry as cotton as he works to keep a steady pace while he walks the streets.
He knows his cheeks are burning bright red, he can feel the heated flush crawling up the back of his neck—up to his ears. Tamaki pulls his hood further over his face as his mind sharply turns down a much filthier path. Vividly picturing you riding his cock while you’re 6 months pregnant. How unbelievably tight your pussy always is, how he’s able to place his hands possessively on your belly as he lets you fuck yourself on his cock. Watching your tits bounce beautifully.
Oh god, oh shit—he craves the satisfaction of fucking another baby into you so much his balls ache. His heart stops momentarily as he feels his cock rapidly thicken against his thigh, hot & heavy. Tamaki is urgently speed walking back to his hero agency because he’s pretty sure the stretchy spandex of his hero outfit is not going to hide his humiliating boner.
•••
Later on that evening, after your daughter has fallen asleep, you find yourself with your hands bound to the metal slats of your headboard. Soft, smooth silk caressing your skin. Binding your wrists together above your head with just the right amount of pressure to keep you from breaking free.
Your skin is starting to feel stretched too tightly over your bones, entire body flushing hotly as Tamaki traces the pads of fingers feather light over your bare breasts. Both of you are naked & he’s been playing with you for what feels like a lifetime. He teases you relentlessly as his thumbs lightly circle your nipples until they pebble up. You can feel your pussy throb.
“Tama,” you whine his nickname lowly, arching your spine as he grips your left tit playfully—desperately pushing further into his touch, you’re craving so much more from your husband. His other hand trails your lower belly idly.
“Hm? What is it my goddess? This not enough for you?” Tamaki teases you with a soft voice, punctuating his words with a rough squeeze. Making sure to pinch your nipple in between his fingers. Your feet are planted on the mattress, thighs spreading even further to fit his lithe frame as you cry out.
“Hah! Oh fuck—no, not enough Tamaki,” you complain with a breathy moan, straining against the silk that ties you down. Goosebumps litter your arms as he rests his warm palms over the bumps of your ribs, fingers splaying out under the swell of your tits.
“No? My, that’s a bit bratty of you,” He murmurs playfully, warm breath tickling over your skin as he presses a kiss to your sternum.
“Baby,” you choke out, tilting your head down to stare at him, eyes pleading. “Please I want your mouth so bad.” Fingers dig into your ribs, forcing a squeaking noise out of you. Tamaki only hums in response as he presses a line of kisses down your soft belly, lowering himself onto his own as he makes his way to your pussy.
“Here?” Tamaki asks innocently before he bites a kiss into the sensitive skin of your hip bone. Your hips twitch, trying to get his over head to your pussy—which is starting to ache, no doubt puffy and slick from being so turned on.
“No,” you whimper, fingers curling into fists, nails digging into the flesh of your palms where you’re bound. Tamaki places his palms on the underside of your thighs, easily pushing them open further for him.
“Oh, so you must mean here hm?” He snickers, dipping his head to kiss the inner part of your thigh, close to the crease, near where you want him the most. He nips at the skin there sharply, making you gasp.
“You know that’s not it Tamaki,” you huff, wiggling in place, frustratedly tugging at the silk yet again. Your shoulders ache a little bit and you have the insanely strong urge to tangle your fingers in his soft, purple hair.
Taking action, you maneuver your legs until you can rest your thighs over his shoulders, heels ready to dig into his upper back. He instinctively wraps an arm around your thigh. The other hand snaking up to brush his fingers through the small patch of curly hair you left above your clit. It makes his cock twitch because it’s like a neon sign pointing him straight to your pretty pussy.
“I’m not quite sure what you want then my goddess,” Tamaki sighs, pretending to be disappointed. “Ya know, only good girls get what they ask for, you should use your words better lovely,” He remarks thoughtfully, pinching your clit between his thumb and fore finger, trying to bite back his smile. One of his canines pokes out over his bottom lip.
“Tama!” You suck air in through clenched teeth, pressing your pussy towards his mouth—but the arm around your thigh is like steel. It makes your pussy drool. “Fucking—Tamaki, please baby, I want you to eat my pussy,” you bite, teeth grinding together in frustration.
“Oh! I see, why didn’t you just ask me in the first place? Such a good girl though, using your words,” Tamaki teases. His warm lips brush over your clit when he speaks & you could strangle the man right there.
You whimper, his praise forcing a thick warmth to your lower belly. It swirls around intoxicatingly, dripping down into your pussy. His wet tongue is so close to your clit you want to rip apart the silk tie. Tamaki takes his chance to wrap both arms around your thighs.
“Tamaki if you don’t—fuck!” Your complaint is cut short. Jaw falling open, fists clenching, when your husband’s warm tongue parts your slick pussy. Moving up to swirl around your clit slowly. Warm shivers race up your spine as he kitten licks over your sensitive flesh.
“Holy shit Tamaki,” you keen, voice watery & thick with pleasure. “Please don’t stop,” you beg, thighs threatening to suffocate him as you cross your ankles over his back. He rewards you with soft lips wrapping around your clit, sucking happily & flicking his tongue at the same time. He teased you so much before that you’re already starting to feel an ominous knot tighten up behind your navel.
“Tama I wanna, oh god—nngh! Fingers, want your fingers in my pussy, please!” You plead, silk cutting into your wrists as you pull painfully. You vaguely remembered to use your words & it pays off. He hums approvingly, making your eyes squeeze shut from the ticklish vibration. Tamaki smoothly lets go of one of your thighs.
With no resistance, he slips his two middle fingers into your overly slick pussy. Stretching you just enough to help you get closer to bliss. He thrusts them at a steady pace—never letting up the suction on your clit. Tongue teasing under the hood in the way he knows you love.
“Fuck! Just like that, Tama please, m’gonna cum,” you whine, tilting your head to look at him again, meeting his gaze. His eyes are half lidded, pale cheeks colored in pink. He’s so pretty it hurts. Your hands start to throb from tensing so hard—circulation cutting off.
The knot of your orgasm tightens frighteningly fast. Tamaki pumps his fingers three more times and just the sight of him is too overwhelming. The base of your skull digs into your pillow as the water balloon pops. Pleasure gushing through your limbs like warm waves.
Your mouth opens in a silent O shape as your entire body goes taught. Your back arches off the bed, stomach muscles clenching. Your pussy acting as a vice while you cum around Tamaki’s fingers. He moves fluidly with your hips as you roll them into his mouth.
Your husband pulls his mouth off your overly sensitive clit with a pop. Fingers still fucking the life out of you.
“Look at you, such a good girl, cumming on my fingers so sweetly,” Tamaki coos. His pink tongue pokes out to lick the slick off his shiny lips. He moans at the taste. The sight pushes a whimper out of your throat.
After a few seconds, your body begins to melt back into into the mattress below. Thighs releasing their death grip on his head. You breathe heavily, watching Tamaki push himself up with one hand, sitting on his haunches. His fingers are still in your pussy & you swallow thickly at the realization.
“You’re too good at that,” you breathe, chancing a peak at your husband’s full, hard cock. It’s a pretty dick. Thick & pale, sticking straight out, pink at the tip. It twitches a few times at your praise. His precum making the tip shiny & saliva gathers in your mouth. You want to lick him clean & swallow him whole. Instead you snap your gaze to his face.
Tamaki is already smiling down at you like he’s read your mind. He takes his fingers from your pussy slowly. Thumb rolling over your clit, making you wince.
“I know you wanna suck my cock but m’gonna knock you now, okay sweet girl? Want me to untie your hands?” He whispers sweetly, running the knuckles of his clean hand over your cheek. You nod, humming softly—only slightly embarrassed by his nasty words.
“Please,” you laugh, tugging on the silk for emphasis. He chuckles gently in return, leaning over to untie your wrists. As he does, the warm, spongy tip of his cock accidentally glides through the mess he made of your pussy. Massaging your puffy clit, making you both moan simultaneously. The weight of his cock making you burn like you have a fever.
Tamaki’s eyes are intense as they stare into yours. He lets you free, hands hovering nearing your face. You pause, flexing your fingers, blood flowing through your veins. You can feel the tension smoldering deliciously between you both, close to blazing.
Hands plant themselves on either side of your head. Tamaki’s warm lips are suddenly smashing against yours desperately. He tilts his head to the side as his lips meet yours over & over. Your fingers finally tangle through his soft hair, tugging on it roughly. He lets his sharp canines catch on your bottom lip in return. Hungrily swallowing the moans he’s pulling from you. A wet tongue only plays with yours briefly.
Tamaki breaks the kiss, sitting back on his heels. Your hands fall limply to your sides when he moves away. He places his palms on your inner thighs, pushing them wide open. You let out a sound of protest, lower lip jutting out. He bites the tip of his tongue, looking amused. The man loves to see you pout.
“Don’t pout my queen, I know what your pretty cunt really wants,” he teases, lightly slapping your clit. You jolt in surprise, fingers fisting the soft material of the sheets.
“Yeah—okay, please fuck me,” you agree, noticing sweat beading in the hollow of your throat.
“I’m gonna stuff you full princess,” Tamaki says, voice airy & light. One hand keeping you spread, the other gripping the base of his shaft & he pushes his slick cock head inside. His jaw clenches at the tight warmth of your pussy.
“I know Tama, c’mon, wanna make you a daddy again,” you tease, wolfish grin pulling at your lips. Tamaki pauses, blinking at you in surprise—cheeks a soft pink. He looks too cute. Said man raises an eyebrow, slipping the rest of his cock in without any warning. Punching a strangled sound from your lungs as you grip your pillow for leverage.
“My queen’s got a filthy mouth,” Tamaki croons, hooking your knees over his elbows—effectively folding you like a pretzel as leans forward. Hands braced by your shoulders this time. “It’s hot,” he giggles. The glare you level him with holds no heat behind it.
He wiggles his eyebrows playfully and pulls his hips backwards teasingly. He only pulls out halfway before thrusting forward smoothly. You grip his shoulders, head falling backwards into the mattress. His cock is so so good.
“Fuck—Tamaki, f-feels amazing,” you moan throatily. The glide of his cock along the inside of your walls is heavenly. Splitting you open just the way you love. He lets the way your body writhes underneath him guide his pace. Wanting to make you howl. You desperately move your hips the best you can to keep up with him.
“Yeah? Your pussy fits me like a glove princess, makes me feel so good.” Tamaki pants slightly, warm breath ghosting over your face. He’s drinking in your breathy moans like a parched man.
“Mmhmm,” you whimper, hanging onto his muscled forearms now. “Harder, please Tama,” you beg, feeling breathless. Your face scrunches up in pleasure as your eyes flutter shut. All you can focus on is the slick feeling of his cock gliding in & out of you, carving out a space.
“That’s such a good girl, asking for what she wants—just like I told her,” Tamaki praises, voice low & sweet like honey. He gives you what you want, making it his goal to curve hips slightly so he can hit your sweet spot dead on.
Your nails dig into his flesh & your back raises off the bed the best it can in this folded position. Your veins are buzzing with pleasure as he fucks you. Eyes rolling so hard back into your skull you’re afraid they’ll get stuck.
“Tamaki!” You almost sob. “I can—ah, oh my god, fucking feels like you’re hitting my cervix.” Your legs flex over his elbows, his strength keeping you pinned however he chooses.
“It’s called a mating press for a reason baby,” Tamaki huffs a laugh, his eyebrows pinching in pleasure as the sound of his pelvis smacking your ass pushes him closer to the edge.
This continues for a while. You’re unsure how long. Tamaki keeps making you cum so intensely you see stars. Hearing going fuzzy. Your hips are starting to ache & then you’re begging him to cum inside you—making his already stiff cock twitch repeatedly. He wants to fill you up so so badly, he just also loves making you cum.
“You’re so sweet when you cum on my cock like that princess,” he whispers. The pretty moans leaving his mouth are music to your ears.
Tamaki knows he’s toed the edge as much as he can & now he’s about to explode. Your pussy squeezes rhythmically around him from your latest orgasm & it’s not helping. His groin aches.
“Tamaki, cum inside me baby,” you murmur, hands reaching up to frame his face. Unable to help the little ah sounds spilling out of you.
“I can’t wait to see your belly stretched with my baby again, such a good mama,” he coos softly, tone brimming with love. Sweat has started to drip from his chin onto your neck & you’re just as sweaty as he is. “Fuck, m’gonna cum, you’re made to take my cock, made to give me babies, my goddess,” Tamaki whines, thrusting shallow & desperate.
You can’t deny the way it makes your pussy flutter around him with the way filth leaves his mouth so easily. Those tiny squeezes must be enough to push him over the edge because he shoves his cock inside you completely. Curly, coarse hair at the base of his cock teasing your clit. Tamaki fills you to the brim, choking on the moans in his throat. Stuffs you with small thrusts, sucking in air through his teeth when he starts to get over sensitive.
You feel so full, wanting so badly for him to get you pregnant. You wrap your arms around his shoulders, hugging him to your chest as Tamaki drops your legs. You let out a groan of relief, feet tingling as you crack your toes. The two of you catch your breath for a moment, hearts thundering.
Eventually, your husband rises, sitting back on his calves. Forcing you to drop your hands to the bed once again. He runs his tongue over his bottom lip as he pulls out of you slowly, admiring the sticky, white cum coating his cock. He groans as he tracks the way his cum trails out of you. Before he can think better of it he drags a thumb over your pussy. Gathering a bit of his cum & wrapping his lips around his thumb to suck it off.
“Tamaki!” You gasp, cheeks burning from the nasty sight. You’re ashamed to admit that it makes your pussy throb.
“I wanted a taste,” he teases, pulling his thumb from his mouth with a wet pop. A surprised laugh tears out of you & then suddenly Tamaki is laughing too. You both giggle as he lies down on his side, facing you. Placing a palm over your lower belly. You slowly intertwine your fingers with his, resting your hands back on your stomach.
“You’re lucky we didn’t wake up Chiyoko,” you mumble, halfhearted in your attempt to scold him. He just laughs.
“I would’ve put her back to bed my queen,” Tamaki teases. You hum, content with his answer, body floating.
“I can’t wait to be pregnant again,” you say in a hushed voice, eyes drifting shut as you relax.
“You’ll be just as beautiful as you always are,” Tamaki whispers in a voice so sweet it’s tooth rotting. The two of you both enjoy the post orgasm haze for a little bit longer before you do anything else.
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miguel-owhora · 5 months
Note
Something like one day Miguel assigns you some task and in the process you encounter a variation of his and you completely forget about your mission, then Miguel has to go look for you because enough time has passed, only to find you half unconscious and very stupid, with clear signs that another Miguel fucked you.
I was actually hooked on your idea idk idk
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TYPE — drabble
SYNOPSIS — what anon said
WARNINGS — 18+ , cheating but is it really cheating if it's a variant of your husband , cunnilingus , squirting , implied multiple orgasms/milking
FEM-ALIGNED READERS AND MINORS DNF, YOU WILL BE BLOCKED.
COMMENTS AND REBLOGS ARE HEAVILY APPRECIATED.
TAGS — @sweetcorpse , @tophamhat-kyo , @villainousdelicacy , @realitylemon , @gayaristocrat , @gaynesspersonified
MORE — this idea literally has me foaming and slamming inside my cage
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This version of your home world isn't unusual. It's literally a couple years from '99, a couple years back into the past. Nothing unusual, nothing uncommon from your current year back in your original timeline. Swinging around your city is nice, the sky dark with the city lights polluting the night sky, preventing you from seeing the stars - that is, you never really did see them, unless if you went to the moon station. But that was only ever a privilege you got once you were older.
You spent majority of your youth in the underground part of Nueva York, living in the dark with only the city lights as the sun. You only ever stepped out whenever you wanted to rebel and when you went to college, and only ever moved out of the underworld - the name many called the underground of NY - when you got with Miguel. Bless his heart, as much as you adored your husband and how many years you've been living on the nicer side of NY - that is in looks, but just barely - you would always favor the underworld. You found that despite the reputation it earned, the people were always more real and down to earth than the people living overhead.
You shook yourself out of your thoughts and just barely swerved out of the way before you hit a pole. You swung yourself up and landed on top of a skyscraper of a building, landing in what many would dub the classic spider pose. You peered over the edge of the building, overlooking the city in all its glory. Nueva York, as a whole, no matter how corny you would sound right now, would forever hold a special place in your heart. The people, the food, the diverse mixture of culture and background - that's what made Nueva York, Nueva York: just a clusterfuck of everyone and everything.
After a solid couple seconds of surveying everything you raised your hand to look at your goober - despite what Miguel tried to get everyone to say, it was a goober at the end of the day, a damn watch if you want to be simple about it - and began to type in it. You read over the mission Miguel gave you, just a simple 'catch an anomaly and go home' type of mission It wasn't one of those big bad villains, just some guy. Didn't even have a name.
You snorted to yourself as you lowered your arm and stretched, grunting as one or two of your bones popped pleasantly, blood flooding back to wherever it needed to go.
"I didn't know we had a Spider-Man."
The sound of Miguel's voice nearly has you falling off the building, and hadn't it been for your ability to stick to surfaces, you would've been a splat of flesh on the floor. You whipped around, startled, and found yourself looking at your husband.
...Future husband, as this Miguel isn't - first of all - your Miguel and younger than the early thirties man you knew and love. But it was still technically your husband. Technically. Unless if this was one of those world's where you didn't go overhead and stayed in the underworld, or something along those lies, somewhere where you never met Miguel.
This Miguel of Earth-547, Miguel-547, was younger than your Miguel, a bit more youthful, but no less handsome. Perhaps in his twenties, with the telltale signs of a lack of sleep on the heavy eyebags underneath his dark eyes, perhaps from studying so much. The thought has you almost snorting but you caught yourself as you stepped down from the railing of the building, looking over at Miguel with a slight tilt of your head.
"You don't. Not yet, at least." You replied, eyeing him with keen interest, mission forgotten.
Miguel raises an eyebrow, looking unimpressed. You shake your head, snorting in amusement. He's Miguel, he's your husband, just like when he was younger, back when you first met him, back when you first roomied with him against your will.
"Who are you?" Miguel asks, and you can see the regret written across his face. This time, it makes you laugh, both at his face and at the question.
"That's.. that's stupid. Nevermind." Miguel mutters, face darkening in embarrassment as he lightly pouted - frowned, whatever, he has the same face for both feelings - and looked away. It's such a Miguel thing to do that you choke and cough, laughing, and wiping away tears that never meet your fingers, not with your mask covering your face.
"I'd tell you my name but..." You rolled your shoulders, placing your hands on your waist. "I think Miguel would get mad at me for revealing my identity, even if it's just my name. I don't want to mess with any canon event. You know how it is."
"I don't." Miguel replied, glancing back at you with a confused expression. "And Miguel? That's.. that's my name. I'm guessing you mean somebody else? And canon ev- what the shock are you even talking about?"
Oh the irony, you thought to yourself. "Something like that, sure, and it's a long story."
Miguel pursed his lips and gave you a look. You grinned behind your mask, the lenses to your mask squinting at him.
"But I can offer you something better."
This got Miguel's attention and you chuckled, still grinning. Gotcha.
Which is how you ended up in Miguel's dorm room, stuffed between his legs and eating at his pussy. His legs hold you firmly between strong thighs, keeping you trapped and stuffing your face into pussy - not that you minded of course. It's your favorite past time, and why would you deny yourself the opportunity to eat your man's cunt like it's your last meal? You'd be a fool not to.
Miguel's voice is breathless and whimpery, a hand holding the back of your face as he shamelessly grinded against your mouth. He arched his back and squeezed his thighs when your mouth attached to his swollen cock, sucking on the sensitive nub. Your tongue dipped into his hole as you felt him tremble and moan, incomprehensible words of praise and encouragement tumbling from his mouth as he came inside your mouth.
He tried to push you away once his climax passed over, but you didn't budge, merely using your enhanced strength to grab onto his thighs and gently push them down. The position made him even more open and gave you even more access to the sweet, delicious slick that poured out of him, which you didn't dare let a spare a single drop and eagerly slurped up.
"Hah - ca- shock! - cálmate, pinche perro!" Miguel moaned, his thighs tensed and twitching as he danced between pushing your head away and humping into your mouth. He moved when you slipped into two fingers and began to move them, thrusting them in and out of his pussy with a certain expertise that came with someone who's done this before, and sucked on his cock.
Whatever you did, however you learned it, was enough to rip an unexpected orgasm from Miguel that had no buildup and caught him off guard. Even moreso when he felt liquid shoot from his pussy and he went unbelievably warm, but shock, if it didn't make him stomach flutter. His cheeks darkened when he heard you obscenely slurp, drinking whatever liquid he squirted out.
"What - what the shock was that?!" Miguel breathed out after you finally pulled away with a pop. Miguel felt something hot and possessive curl in his stomach when he saw the bottom half of your face - the only thing you dared to show him, the upper part of your face was hidden by the mask you wore - was dripping wet with his fluids. He watched as you licked your lips; and Miguel swallowed.
"You squirted," You said calmly, as if it was the most normal thing in the world. You pulled your fingers away from his pussy and plopped them into your mouth, cleaning them of whatever slick coated it, and Miguel stared with wide eyes.
He slowly blinked and looked away, beyond flustered.
"I never knew I could do that." Miguel muttered, panting.
"Well now you do, use it wisely." You replied, amused, lips curled into a teasing grin. Miguel rolled his eyes, but not unkindly. Your eyes flickered from his face down to the rest of his body and over to the lower half. His pussy was slick and swollen, the dark hair neatly trimmed, looking and smelling and tasting absolutely delicious. That never did change about him, did it? You could spend all eternity between his legs, eagerly doting on his cunt.
You snapped out of your thoughts with a little grunt as Miguel suddenly hauled you off the ground and onto his bed, flat on your back. The lenses of your mask widened and your mouth went dry when Miguel swung himself over your lap, straddling you. Your hands instinctively fell onto his waist, so small and holdable, and nervously giggled, licking your lips that suddenly felt too dry.
"What's - what's all this about?" You asked, flustered. Miguel seemed to pick up on this and smiled, a little dangerous, a little fond. He slowly rolled his hips down, eyes gleaming when you softly moaned, your cock, hard in your suit, eagerly responding to some stimulation.
"Just a little treat. You ate me out..." Miguel's hand reached down to grab a hold of your cock, rubbing it through the material of your spandex. "...So I'll let you hit."
"Fuck." You whispered, breathless. Miguel just chuckled, eyes dark and smile dangerous in the way that made you fall in love all over again.
-
"Have you checked on [Name], Miguel?"
The sound of his AI's voice is enough to rip Miguel's attention from the holograms in front of him. His eyes feel dry as he gives a couple of blinks, vision straining from having stared at screens for so long. It takes a couple of heartbeats before Miguel could process Lyla's question and gave her a questioning look as she hovered near him.
"What?" He asked, intelligently, and totally not in a dumb way.
Lyla rolled her eyes, exasperated. "[Name]? Your husband? The one you sent on a mission?"
It was Miguel's turn to roll his eyes. "I know the name of my husband. Why are you asking if I checked up on him? He's reliable, he'll get the job done."
Lyla smirked in the way that told Miguel she knew something he didn't and could already feel his heart dropping to his stomach.
"What's wrong?" Miguel demanded, immediately on alert, his mind beginning to creep with different scenarios that made him stomach twist uncomfortablely.
"Nothing's wrong. He's fine, he's not hurt." Lyla paused and gave him a look over her heartshaped glasses. "He's just neglecting his duties for a variant."
Miguel processed the words and paused, eyebrow raising. "Variant?"
Lyla just smirked even wider, glitching and moving somewhere else, teasing. A set of coordinates appeared on Miguel's watch.
"Why don't you check it out?" Lyla chuckled, stuffing her hands into her pockets. "But just go alone, alright?"
Miguel didn't know if he wanted to strangle Lyla or himself. He wasn't sure if he wanted to know.
He took a deep breath and rubbed his temple. He could already feel the telltale sign of a migraine appearing, and no, his lack of sleep did NOT contribute to it.
"Lyla, open a portal." He eventually sighed out, dragging a hand over his face to get rid of any drowsiness.
"You got it, boss."
The orange and colorful portal appeared in front of Miguel, lighting up his dark lab in a warm color, changing the texture of the area around it. Miguel took a moment to appreciate it, a moment to gather himself, before throwing himself in the portal.
He knew the world he sent you to was one of your guy's timelines. Just a couple years back into the past, nothing crazy. The whole mission was a simple one, even a newbie could've done it. He knew you could handle more, obviously, but the thought of you getting hurt, of losing you, that frightened Miguel. It scared him. And while he knew you'd get tired of basic missions like the one he assigned you, he wouldn't budge. Well, at least not now.
But he didn't think he'd end up in a rather familiar dormroom. Specifically, his old dorm room, in his bedroom. Familiar posters line the walls, little figurines scattered around, his old desk lined next to his bed and scattered with messy shit. It's nostalgic, and for a second, Miguel imagines himself as his fresh out of high school guy barely entering his college years.
What's out of place, however, is the body of his husband laying on his bed. He's not dead, thankfully, Miguel's eyes catching sight of the slow rise and fall of his chest, and if anything, seems to be half out of it.
His mask is pulled halfway up, from his nose and down being the only thing revealed. His lips are slick and bit, light bruises on his jaw. The pants of his spandex are pulled down far enough to reveal his cock, which lays heavy and flaccid on his stomach, and yet...
Miguel's cheeks darkened and his lips pursed when he saw the dried evidence of cum on your belly and cock. Miguel pixelated his mask away, sighing out of exasperation, even if his core squirmed in a familiar way.
Miguel walked the short steps towards his bed and hovered over you, taking in your frazzled and obviously worn out appearance. Miguel reached down and gently grasped your jaw, tilting your head to get a better look at you.
He was surprised when you softly groaned, squirming as you seemed to awake up.
"Miguel?" You slurred out, and Miguel then realized his variant must've had his time with you.
"[Name,] ready to head back home?" Miguel questioned, his voice quiet but a faint hint of affection tinting his words. Perhaps he should be jealous that a variant got to his husband, but he can't find it in himself. If anything, it was... kind of hot. But that was another thing for another time.
"Mm? Home.... wait-" You stirred a little, becoming just the slightest bit alert. "Which dimension?"
Miguel made a little exasperated face even if you couldn't see. "928."
You went slack, pleased with the answer. "Mkay, le's go h'me..." You slurred before promptly knocking yourself out. Miguel stared before slowly setting your head down. He gently pulled your mask down and stuffed yourself back into your spandex before scooping you up.
"Lyla-" He began but was caught off by the AI, who glitched into existent.
"He looks kind of cute. You're, like, his knight in shining armor - or would it be spider in shining armor?" Lyla mused as she took a couple mixtures of the husbands. Miguel didn't dignify her with a response as a portal opened up, illuminating the room in a warm colorful glow. Then, a thought crossed his mind and he paused.
"Did he even finish his mission?" Miguel asked Lyla, even if he knew the answer.
"Absolutely not." Lyla grinned.
Miguel took a deep breath but didn't get angry - he never did get angry with you, now did he?
"Send someone to finish it." Miguel asked as he slipped through the portal, his AI glitching out of air. Missions he damned, he had his own mission now: giving you the aftercare his variant failed to do, which, in his opinion, made him the best variant out there.
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all rights reserved © miguel-owhora
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meiluu · 9 months
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Leon S. Kennedy NSFW Drabble
Plagas!Leon/ Reader(AFAB) *not edited*
cw: SMUT 18+ MDNI
He needed you like he needed air, you were precious- irreplaceable. You were the best thing that ever happened to him and you were the biggest motivator to come back home while he was on his mission in Spain. Death had its bony fingers wrapped tight around him and it was only after he ripped apart Saddler and all of his little minions with their own ‘holy body’ did he finally feel deaths grasp loosen. Leon felt a surge of satisfaction at how he was able to resist Saddlers tries at controlling him, it brought him absolute joy watching as his face twisted up in confusion and anger at how Leon was stronger than him. But none of that mattered, all that mattered was seeing you in what felt like an eternity had passed. Leon had gotten the chance to clean and change his clothes, holding his duffle in his left hand he saw your car pull up into the airport parking. His whole body buzzed in a mixture of excitement and anticipation to what was to come.
Your intoxicating smell filled the air around him, and your sweet whimpers of pleasure were nothing short of a symphony to his ears. God you were so beautiful like this. Covered in his marks along with his cum smearing the insides of your thighs. He had done a good job fucking you dumb, reduced to nothing but moaning mess. This was the perfect opportunity to change you. Leaning down while still keeping his pace of his cock bullying into your cunt, he lets his canines elongate. Finding the spot where your neck and shoulder meet he sinks his teeth in as he feels the walls of your cunt squeezing and quivering around him as you orgasm for the umpteenth time tonight. A shocked cry of pain mixing with pleasure falls from your lips as Leon pushes parts of his plaga into you. A moment passes before he’s satisfied with his work, pulling back he can already see the faint black veins spreading from where he bit you. His own veins darken in response to yours his body trying to call out to yours- even though the process has just begun. “So beautiful, my good girl.” Voice rough with lust, his hands begin to massage and comfort your body while his once burning kisses now turn to soft loving one’s gently worshipping your tired body. Hopefully your transition will be quick- he couldn’t wait to see all of the changes that the plaga will bring to you.
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This is kind of a continuation/ alternate version of my other plagas!leon Drabble lol, i am obsessed with this concept. I may write another Drabble that’s actually a continuation of this one, but that is tbd
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moonlitxeuphoria · 1 month
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Zuko’s hands left her face, and his fingertips were curling around one of her wrists again just like before, though much gentler this time.
Then he carefully guided her palm to settle flat against his chest as it rapidly rose and fell, right over his thundering heartbeat.
“Do you feel that?”
Zuko’s voice rasped out from somewhere nearby in the blackness, perhaps mere inches from her face.
A rough palm rested atop the back of her hand, holding her shaking fingers in place and splaying them out flat against the sweat-dampened fabric covering his chest.
“That’s my heart,” he continued, hoarser now than she’d ever heard him sound before. “Do you feel it beating?”
She could, though it felt more like a drum being thrashed out of control amidst the haze still swirling in her mind.
“Focus on that,” Zuko whispered.
Warm air gently washed over her face now as he moved closer into her space and panted somewhere above her in the night air.
“Find my heartbeat. Listen.”
Delicate - Chapter 18 by Jasmine-Tea-Latte
Had this one in the works for a while, and boy am I glad it finally made it out of the woods 🎉
Funny story, I actually drew another version of this exact scene like waaaay back during my first round of fanart for this fic, but hated how it looked so I waited a couple months after the fact and then tried my hand at redrawing it 🤣)
Anywaaaaays, if you haven’t already, pleaaaase go check out this amazing fic by @jasmine-tea-latte , you will not be disappointed!!
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bangtanflirt · 9 months
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(Un)natural Instincts (Part 3)
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angst, fluff, smut
Pairings: OT7 x Fem Reader, Human CEO Reader, Human Assistant Yoongi, Wolf Hybrids Joon, Jin, Hobi, Jimin, Tae, and Kook.
Basic premise: You and your assistant end up rescuing six wolf hybrids. No part of the process is easy.
Part 1 > Part 2 > Part 3 > Part 4
General Warnings: Hybrid abuse and lab experimentation, hybrids as second-class citizens/owned property, future smut (Minors DNI, 18+ content)
Specific Warnings: torture collars, needles, surgical collar removal (implied not shown), drugs, one mention of euthanasia, misogyny in the workplace
____
Jungkook tries to hide behind you the second he walks into Dr. Gong’s office. The doctor greets both of you in a friendly manner, guiding Jungkook to the patient bed while you stand close by.
You can tell she wants to ask about the collar, but refrains. Even if she did, you’d have to make up some lie, as the product isn’t officially released yet. But you’re thankful she doesn’t. Dr. Gong is one of the top hybrid doctors in the country, and you’re sure her usual clientele expect her not to ask questions when it comes to their hybrids.
She wastes no time checking the wolf’s vitals and getting the needle ready.
Jungkook turns his head away when the blood is being drawn, choosing to look at your face instead. You make sure to tell him how good he’s doing every three seconds.
The receptionist comes in with an assortment of drinks and snacks as you wait for the results to come through. The second you give permission, Jungkook is diving his hands straight to the banana milk, making both you and the doctor chuckle.
“How did you do it Ms. Shin?”
“Do what?”
“Domesticate a 40% wolf hybrid? I mean, it’s remarkable. You two must have a really great bond.”
Yeah…a great bond.
You chuckle nervously, “We do.”
You and the doctor make more small-talk as Jungkook eats and drinks his way through every snack in front of him. When the results finally come in, the smile from Dr. Gong’s face drops immediately.
“What’s the matter? Is it severe? What’s the allergy?”
“It’s not severe, very mild actually…but the substance…”
“What is it Doctor?”
“Y/N, I need you to be completely honest with me, have you been giving Jungkook any substances lately?”
Substances? The hormones are in his bloodstream, but there couldn’t be anything sketchy in there when it’s been patented…could there?
“What substance did you find?”
“Fevocaine. To be specific, when I did an allergy test, fevocaine showed up. However, when I ran a secondary drug test specifically for fevocaine detection, the report was all clear. This is an advanced version of the drug that somehow goes undetected when tested for, I would have had no idea if not for the allergy test. You know how serious this is, don’t you? I’m going to need to get the police involved.”
Fevocaine? One of the most high-alert drugs on the government’s system? Oh…Kang was done for.
___
It’s not long after you, Dr. Gong, and Jungkook sit with the authorities that the Pet Paradise research facility gets raided. You guide the police there yourself, watching researchers scramble as their hormone development lab is found stashing copious amounts of the banned drug.
A special type of joy overtakes you when you see Kang Byung-hun grace the TV the next day, handcuffed and yelling over and over again about how he did nothing wrong. You know better than to think it’s over, as Kang’s lawyers are sure to put up a fight, but right now you just want to celebrate this moment. Jungkook watches alongside you, letting the question on the tip of his tongue drop at last.
“Does this mean I can see my pack again?”
“I don’t see why not. I’ll talk to the feds and figure it out.”
That’s the first time Jungkook hugs you, sobbing happy tears into your shoulder.
You have your schedule cleared for the next day, taking an emergency leave for the first time in your career.
“We really have to thank you once again for your cooperation, Ms. Shin. I know you’re a very busy woman.”
The head of the investigation, Special Agent Kwon, ushers you into a seat in his office.
“I’m just glad this is all sorted out. Fevocaine is no light matter.”
“It definitely is not. May I ask what brings you here today? If I remember correctly, we got all the statements we needed from you already.”
“I’m here to follow-up on what will happen to the hybrids. Jungkook is still under my care, and as you can imagine, he’s dying to be reunited with his pack.”
“Ah yes, I’m sure. Well, we’d love to reunite them. Thankfully, the fevocaine was given in doses too low to leave long-term impact, so the plan is to de-collar and give all the hybrids to the state.”
“To the state? Like an adoption center.”
“Precisely.”
“But they’re 40% wolf…they won’t ever be adopted once the collar wears off. Will they be released into the wild?”
Agent Kwon shifts uncomfortably in his seat.
“We can’t release lab-hybrids into the wild.”
“So then what?”
More uncomfortable shifting.
“If they can’t be adopted, the shelter will have to consider euthanasia.”
No. Absolutely the fuck not.
“Let me take them.”
“What?”
“You heard me. I’ll adopt all six right now.”
“Ms. Shin, I don’t think that’s—”
“Rational? Probably not. But it’s better than the alternative. You and I both know no state-funded rehab is going to make a difference. I can give them what the government can’t. I can give them an actual fair shot at life.”
There’s a pause as the agent mulls it over.
“If you’re that adamant about it, I’ll see if I can figure something out.”
You get a call later that day, telling you that you have clearance to go ahead with the adoption procedures. It’s the first time you initiate a hug with Jungkook, telling him the good news.
“Thank you Y/N. Thank you so much. I don’t know how we’ll ever repay the kindness you’ve shown us.”
He’s sobbing again, and you hold him steady in your arms.
___
It’s the next day and you can’t help but feel antsy about your driver taking Jungkook to Dr. Gong without you. You know he doesn’t like doctors, but he needs his collar off as soon as possible.
You’re in the office kitchen when you get a call to begin the adoption process. All the worrying over the hybrids has you completely forgetting where you are and how you’re seen here—because the next thing you know, gossip is running wild.
And now you’re seen as everything you didn’t want to be.
The men aren’t exactly subtle, making jabs about how you’ve been an emotional push-over this entire time and how the mask is finally slipping off. You try to ignore it, but you can’t escape.
“Maybe she’ll invest in the HoloPad if we give her a sob story for it. She’ll buy six versions herself, I bet.”
“You think she has some supercharged maternal instincts from bottling it down all these years? She sees the six as her little babies?”
“This is going to be really good for the company. Six hybrids mean six ways to get dicked down. Maybe she’ll finally stop being a frigid bitch!”
“This was supposed to be the investment that give us our bonuses, and she snitched to the police because she couldn’t handle seeing hybrids cry…not even people…but hybrids! How can anyone take her seriously?!”
You told yourself you’d never cry at work, no matter the countless times you’ve wanted to, but you can’t help the tears from falling today. You’re in your office with the blinds closed, but it still feels like you’ve broken the promise to yourself: the promise to not let the people here break you.
There’s a gentle knock at the door.
“One moment” you say, frantically reaching for the powder foundation to hide your crying face.
“It’s just me.”
You stop, breathing a sigh of relief.
“Come in.”
Yoongi enters tactfully, making sure the door isn’t open enough for anyone to see you.
He sets a mint tea on the table, as well as a packet of ginseng which he mixes into it in front of you.
“Try this, it’ll calm you down.”
You don’t question it. He pats your back as you down the drink, watching over with worry etched into his features. It takes a while for the tears to stop falling and your breathing to steady, but he patiently stays by your side.
“Is it true that you’re adopting all six?”
You nod, putting the now empty cup down.
“The collar effects are going to go down Y/N…it’s way too dangerous.”
“If they do end up clawing my face off, I really think I deserve it at this point.”
It’s your poor attempt at a joke, but Yoongi isn’t laughing.
“Let me move in.”
“Excuse me?”
“Let me move in for a while. I can’t let you live there alone with six wolf hybrids. I won’t.”
“Yoongi, I appreciate you looking out for me, but the last thing I need are additional rumors. The people here are going to have a field day with the sugar-mommy jabs if you move in.”
“Y/N, they’ve been calling me your sugar baby since the second week I’ve been here. They’ve never cared for the truth when it comes to you. We’ll keep it low-key, but if they find out then they find out. Your safety is the priority here.”
He’s got a point. How much could anyone say that hasn’t been said already? And, as much as you’re trying to keep it from showing, you are scared of what could happen once their natural instincts kick in.
“Fine. I’m picking them all up after work tomorrow. I’ll text you when we’re all back home and you can come.”
___
The second you open the door to the doctor’s office, you’re ambushed by a mop of brown hair in a hospital gown.
You peel him off to take in his new appearance, with white, blood-stained bandages replacing where the collar once was.
“He was asking for you every five minutes.” Dr. Gong comments from her desk.
“Thank you so much for letting him stay here while I was working.”
“It actually turned out for the good, gave me some time to monitor his vitals and behavior. This isn’t exactly a case I’m used to seeing. I should probably monitor the ones tomorrow too.”
You give Jungkook a sympathetic look as he tugs tightly onto the sleeve of your blouse.
“And I bet you were so good for Dr. Gong, weren’t you Jungkook?”
He looks over in the doctor’s direction, only feeling confident enough to respond once she gives a reassuring nod.
“I w-was. She told me I was really brave.”
“He was scared, but he followed directions really well.”
“I even got a reward! Apparently, these taste really good” He holds up an orange lollipop, only to realize that he’s half-crushed it in his fist. He looks so devastated that you feel bad for wanting to laugh.
“Doc, you don’t happen to have any more of those, do you? I think Jungkook forgot his strength for a second.”
Dr. Gong smiles before tossing another one in his direction.
Jungkook entertains himself on the sofa in the waiting room, watching “Extraordinary Attorney Woo”—aka his first assignment from you. You fondly watch through the window of the office as he pulls out a little notepad and pen, eager to jot down the key points.
You turn your attention back on the doctor, ready to be briefed on next steps.
“As far as I can tell, the collar removal process went as smoothly as possible. I’ll give you a wound care kit and instructions before you leave today, but the wounds should heal in the next twelve days. For the changes inside his body, the synthetic hormones will take around twenty days to fully leave his system. I have to advise you to be careful of your safety as this process occurs, because his high level of wolf can make him dangerous in as little as ten days.”
You let the weight of her words sink in, the whole situation becoming more and more tangible now.
“I’ll be careful.”
She gives a nod before continuing, “I understand the other five are coming for collar removal tomorrow as well. It will be the same for all of them. Oh and one more thing,”
She shuffles through a file before placing a piece of paper in front of you,
“This is a record of his last heat suppressant. He’s due for a shot next week. My guess is that the other five are too, so you can schedule that with the receptionist accordingly.”
You’d been meaning to ask Jungkook when his next heat would be and how to prepare, but you’d completely forgotten heat suppressant shots were a thing; most owners would rather not deal with the “inconvenience” of their hybrids in heat.
“Is it necessary to keep them on it? Their hormones have already been messed with enough.”
“I wouldn’t advise them to be taken off of it for at least the next month. Give some time until after removal of the collar since it’s best to keep everything else in their bodies as stable as we can right now. If you still feel this way after then, you can stop scheduling the shots.”
 You nod, “Thank you doctor. You’ve been such a great help throughout all of this.”
___
You wince as you undo the bandages and gauze, seeing the exposed wounds. He jumps the second you touch his skin with a cotton pad, applying the saline solution as gently as you know how, with the antibiotic cream right after.
“Here you go” you say, handing him his prescribed pain meds. “You have to take one every eight hours. It’s really important you don’t forget, or it will hurt really bad. Understand?”
He nods, making a face as he swallows the bitter pill. It’s not even one second after he swallows it that you’re holding the allergy one up in front of his face.
“Are you excited to see your pack tomorrow?”
His face goes from contorting in disgust to the biggest grin imaginable.
“I’m so excited! I missed them so much!”
“I can’t wait to get to know them. They’ll be getting their collars off in the morning, observed for a few hours like you were today, and I’ll pick them up right after work. My assistant will come a bit after, he’s staying over too. You were sleeping last time he was here, so I didn’t get a chance to introduce you.”
“Someone else will be staying too? For the night?”
“For a while actually. He’ll be helping me take care of all of you.”
You don’t dare say the real reason to the boy’s face.
“We won’t cause trouble, I promise! We’ll be really really well-behaved.”
“I bet you will be,” you chuckle, fluffing his hair, “but wound care for all of you is not easy for me to do alone. You’ll all love Yoongi, I promise.”
You aren’t completely lying; having Yoongi here is going to be a huge help in that regard, but the main reason is still because of how wrong all of this can go…because you can’t trust any of them yet…not even your sweet Jungkook.
____
Work is the last place you want to be right now, especially with the snickering and gossiping at an all-time high. It doesn’t help that you’re handing over your duties to the COO today, taking three weeks off to properly help all six of the hybrids. It’s the first time you’ve ever taken time off, and you’re paranoid about handing things over to someone else. It’s not like your COO, Hwang Minhyun, isn’t reliable or competent—quite the opposite, actually—but you’re just not used to giving someone control like this. Yoongi assures you he’ll stick by Minhyun’s side for the whole three weeks, reporting everything you need him to, and that makes you breathe a little lighter.
It feels like you’re taking a walk of shame when you leave work.
You know the latest whispers, people saying you’re taking time off because you got your feelings hurt…because you’re too sensitive…
It stings.
But you can’t let it show, and you certainly can’t break down when you have five hybrids waiting for you at Dr. Gong’s.
You drive with infinite worries in your head, almost running a red light on the way.
This time when you enter through the door, there is no hybrid running into your arms. It’s the exact opposite, with five bodies flinching and huddling together in fear—neck bandages matching Jungkook’s. They no doubt remember you as one of the many people ogling them at the facility.
There’s a social worker right by them, but he doesn’t look all too pleased to be there. Hybrid social work is considered the lowest position, and most don’t do it with much diligence.
Dr. Gong brushes past the group to welcome you, “Welcome back Ms. Shin. Happy to say all of the removal procedures went well.”
The social worker steps up,
“Hello Ms. Shin. I’m Jo, the social worker in charge of this case. I’m here to collect a few signatures and hand the hybrids off. It’s nice to meet you.”
“Nice to meet you as well” you say, meeting his handshake.
The hybrids’ ears stand straight on their heads at the mention of being handed off, you see their eyes widen in alarm, one of them—Jimin, you remember—squeaks.
“We-we’re going home with her?”
Jo shushes the wolf, glaring sternly before turning his attention back to you.
“Sorry about that.”
You raise a brow, “Why is he asking that? Surely, they know what’s happening right now?”
He gives a nonchalant shrug, “I don’t think anyone’s told them yet.”
“What do you mean? Why haven’t you told them?”
“With all due respect Ms. Shin, keeping them in the loop isn’t part of my job description. I just need to make sure they follow orders.”
The annoyance on his features makes your right hand itch to slap it off of him, but you take a deep breath, not wanting to make a scene in front of the terrified wolves. You need to be tactical and get them adopted as soon as possible.
“Of course, my apologies.” You deliver your signature tight-lipped smile.
Dr. Gong takes charge of the conversation, speed-running the post-surgery instructions as they are identical to yesterday’s. She tries to give them lollipops, but they start shaking harder and she quickly tucks them back into a drawer.
It’s not long before you’re signing the adoption papers, double checking to make sure Jungkook is included in the agreement as well. It baffles you that he doesn’t even need to be present for his adoption—a clear indicator of how much care the government gives towards hybrid autonomy.
“They’re all yours. I’ll schedule a house-visit in two weeks, to make sure they aren’t a danger to you. If we find anything alarming, the state will take them, as stated in the papers.”
It doesn’t go unnoticed that there’s no mention of whether or not the hybrids are safe. It breaks your heart knowing not even their own social worker cares about that.
“Thank you. I’ll take them off your hands now.”
___
The car ride gives you déjà vu, with four of the hybrids in the back, eyes trained on the floor. Namjoon takes the seat beside you, putting on his guard hybrid senses on display as he sits with his chin protruding in deep concentration. He’s the only one not looking down, but instead on the road.
“Sorry for springing all of this on you guys,” No one looks up, but you continue, “Jungkook is so excited to see everyone again.”
Suddenly, ten pairs of eyes are trained on you.
Namjoon speaks in an instant, forgetting to ask for permission in the haze of hearing his youngest packmate’s name “Jungkook? Our Koo?! He’s with you…he’s alive?!”
They really didn’t know a thing.
You can’t imagine how hard it must’ve been for them, seeing him get taken away and having no idea if he was even alive. You hope Kang Byung-hun and his researchers are having a great time rotting in their prison cells right now.
“He’s alive and well, got his collar taken off yesterday.” You give the warmest smile you know how.
You hear various sighs of relief, paired with low whispers that you can’t quite make out in the back.
____
A/N: I cannot believe how much positivity and love this series is receiving so far. THANK YOU GUYS SO MUCH! I love reading your thoughts and seeing you as invested in these characters as I am, and it gets me so excited to write future parts!
Series taglist is now closed (unless you asked me before this part was up and I missed @ ing you, in which case please DM me!)
Permanent Taglist: @skyys-universe @morelovefortn
Series Taglist [CLOSED]: @welcometomyworld13 @kalala22 @fxirytaetae @btsfluffsworld @belikejk @shycreationdreamland @danielle143 @singukieee @blackrockshooter780 @g-b-artist @i-have-no-life-charlie @wyldch1ld @no-regrets-just-confusion @acciocriativity @ldysmfrst @amara-mars @caelumwrites @estrellaburnxd @borahaetelevision @on-1ce @fuckthinking @jaiele
*If Tumblr doesn't let me tag you for some reason, I'll send you a DM instead!
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zorosbeau33 · 3 months
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Oi, you wanna die? Zoro x Gender Neutral Reader Drabble
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❖ One Piece, Zoro x gender neutral reader
❖ Scenarios/Drabble, Established Relationship AU, Protective Boyfriend Zoro
❖ TRIGGER WARNING Unwanted advances from a third party, 18+ Only due to theme
❖ wc: 1706
❖ Prompt "You said no and they didn't listen how does your partner respond?" ❖ Masterlist ❖ Luffy Version
. ⋅˚̣- : ✧ : – ⭒ ⊹ ⭒ – : ✧ : -˚̣⋅ ⋅˚̣- : ✧ : – ⭒ ⊹ ⭒ – : ✧ : -˚̣⋅ .
Hope you all enjoy~ A couple people had requested more of the crew so here is Zoro for a start! I wasn't quite sure where to go with it but I think this will suffice for now!
. ⋅˚̣- : ✧ : – ⭒ ⊹ ⭒ – : ✧ : -˚̣⋅ ⋅˚̣- : ✧ : – ⭒ ⊹ ⭒ – : ✧ : -˚̣⋅ .
The marines didn’t seem to notice things were amiss, then again none of them probably dared to imagine the legendary Straw Hat pirates would crash a military gala. Zoro himself fidgeted behind his mask, eye sweeping the room and numbering dozens of high ranking officials. This was definitely not his scene, stuffed into a black and sparkly prince costume with black jewel encrusted mask? Yeah not his style at all. The amount of men and women he’d shrugged off, or downright snubbed tonight in favor of finding more alcohol to drink was staggering. Not that he’d noticed, after one dance that he’d only done because Nami threatened him to do it to blend in long before they’d actually broken in. Flirtations were not his strong suit, and being a firm believer in no ending all advances he was disgusted when several people tried to laugh it off and continue in their attempts to touch him. 
All of this has culminated in the pursing of his lips as he tried not to sneer in disgust. Leaning against a pillar during a brief moment of quiet to himself Zoro once again scanned the room. It was beginning to unnerve him, sure he could see Nami fitting in without any issues wrapped in the arms of a high ranking admiral. Hell he could even see precious precocious prince Sanji with a line of women waiting to dance with him. That might come to bite them in the ass soon if the jealous glares of the womens husbands and wives said anything. However Zoro believed the cook would reap what he sowed and that it was none of his business. What nagged at him however was the evident lack of…you.
For three hours they had patrolled the floor and the garden, and yet you were no where to be found. A frown did manage to tug his lips downwards when he moved around a thick crowd of people and up the stairs. Yes, he should leave it be and concentrate on the mission of extracting all the information they could while Nami stole the key off the admiral and passed it along to Luffy, Robin and Brook. But the nagging sensation of you being missing for THIS long? Nothing normally could stir him to panic-reasonable panic. His captain falling in the water or slingshotting directly at his face was reasonable panic. This was not such a time, bubbles seemed to turn to knots in his gut. His scar itched. 
Halfway up the stairs he heard it, unable to hide his reaction as he perked up swinging his head around towards the sound of a familiar laugh. Zoro felt you before he saw you, Haki registering your presence far closer to him than he had anticipated. In fact there in the middle of the group of people he had been made to work around several times, stood your glorious form. Nami had outdone herself with your outfit and Zoro had almost swallowed his tongue on the ship when he first saw you. Now even more so under the glitter and glow of the chandeliers, your laugh made the tension melt from his muscles while he stopped his prowling to take you in. In this atmosphere you were radiant, seemingly to have been born out of the most beautiful emerald just to grace the presence of those around you. The jewel encrusted mask covering your face only added to the mystery around you, causing those around you to lean in all the closer. Perhaps you needed no savior, though Zoro felt it his first duty as the man that belonged to you. Swordsmiths above he was so smitten with you, lingering on the stairs above your group to watch you, scowl melting into a tender smile. He would have to apologize to Nami and Luffy later, his sword was supposed to belong to his captain then the mission. But here the only person he could allow claim to him was your radiance. A betrayal he was sure they would understand, it was common knowledge to all of the crew that his heart and soul had found their home in your hands. 
So imagine his rage when your smile fell away into a look of shock, yanking your arm back from the grips of a pot bellied slobbering ‘gentleman’. Capable like he knew you were, you quickly extricated yourself from the pudgy admiral who reeked of weaks old cheese and beer. The gaudy prince attire nearly popping buttons off as the heavy drinker puffed himself up indignantly. Zoro would miss the next few moments as he rushed down the staircase and began to force his way through the gasping and shocked onlookers who had until this moment been fawning over your intelligence and eloquent words. His fury was three fold for he knew how hard you had practiced to learn all these speech patterns and points of talk to be a good distraction as needed by the plan. However when the noise of a slap rang out he couldn’t help but bark a command for the people in front to move.
Being all of military standing or married into, they felt his haki and heard his commands and moved apart at once. Years of training telling even the higher ranks this must be someone  with power and the gravitas of higher station To do such a thing at the military gala. Relief infantesimally warmed his cold gaze, the sound of the slap had in fact come from your strike and not the admirals. Zoro knew this man too well, he’d bought and blustered his way up to the position he was in now, and falling out of graces with Akainu’s strength based rule had resorted to underhanded trickery and binge drinking. 
“Once a sleeze ball always a sleezeball.” scoffed someone in the crowd as a woman pulled you closer to herself and away from the enraged man before you. Bits of wien splattered down his front as he spluttered and clutched his hand to his chest, beer belly nearly busting his gaudy belt buckle. 
“Admiral he started it! They told him no and he tried to force it! Should we court marshal him?” A young Captain stepped forward to report to Zoro, also taking on a defensive stance in front of you. To your credit you were playing the distressed and meak house spouse very well, although he knew just from looking your strike had most probably broken at least two of the mans meaty fingers. Thankfully it seemed his display had caused others to believe him to be an important military official rather than raise suspicion about his person. Zoro gathered himself together, he couldn’t afford to make too much of a scene here. While everyones masks and disguises made the party much safer for them to intervene. They did not need to draw to many eyes upon themselves or else the costumed Zoro’s in the crowd might jog someones mind to realize the real one was standing in front of them. After that it would only be a matter of minutes before the others would get picked out from the crowd as well. 
He needed to protect you, but in a way that would seem appropriate and take attention off of you both and quickly. Squaring his shoulders Zoro tutted and switched all his weight to his right foot, arm resting on the hilt of his single sword. Adapting the posture of a haughty admiral was not difficult it often amused him when he was a bounty hunter to see all of their posturing, the arrogance was easy to emulate. A flick of the hand had several people stepping forward seizing the admirals wrists and forcing them behind him. 
“This is a party, I advise you keep your voice down before I report your misdeeds to headquarters directly…” His deep voice rumbled and he let out a dramatic sigh. “Take him out of here without a scene, knock him out if you have to. The part-the gala is a place only those of high standing are allowed. Such behavior will not be tolerated, have him placed on trial…tomorrow morning he can sit in the cells for tonight.” 
The man bellowed his outrage, stating his rank and to unhand him right this moment. In an instant Zoro’s hand was around his skull, and squeezing. Rage turned into pain and he gasped spluttering in pain, the captains almost dropping him in shock at the speed of Zoro’s moves. 
“OI…do you wanna die?” Zoro growled lowly so only he and the two captains could hear. They froze and stared in shock and fear. The rage he had felt upon seeing the man place his hand on you without your consent, causing his pupils to dilate. Haki spreading over his fingertips hidden only by the gloves that accented his outfit. Blood pounding in his ears, ready to lay this man to sleep for his crime. The smell of the admiral wetting himself hardly registering to his senses, how dare this scum…Barely reeling himself in Zoro leaned back out and let him go. “You already placed your hands on my partner and now you disgrace this place. Get him out of our sight.” 
Turning quickly on his heel Zoro took his handkerchief out and wiped the makeup from the admiral off his fingers in a show of disgust. Reeling in his rage before stopping in front of you again, thanking the woman in a low murmur as he took you from her grip. People bowed and scuttled out of his way while he hurriedly guided you away to the gardens, arm wrapped securely around your waist. Once in the open air he sighed in relief and slowed down checking on you now as he readied himself for Nami to beat him over the head once you returned to the ship. Yes you could have defended yourself, and you certainly had but he would always be here to ensure that you would be okay. Even if you teased him for his bad acting skills for the rest of his life, you being safe and your boundaries being respected were far more than worth it in his mind.
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madaqueue · 2 months
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Practice Makes Perfect | Chapter 10
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synopsis: you and yuji have been best friends basically as long as you can remember, and you made a promise to each other to stay friends and help each other be the best versions of yourselves for your future partners. but will things change when yuji finally starts looking for a relationship?
pairing: yuji itadori (18+) x f!reader
themes/content: modern college au (characters aged up to 18+). language. 18+, MDNI
word count: 1.7k
a/n: clarity by zedd playing softly in the background
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After your fight with Yuji, things get bad. The next month is a blur. Your mind is clouded, unable to focus on your classes, or anything else for that matter. You feel like you’re watching yourself going through the motions everyday - wake up, go to class, come home, eat, sleep, repeat. As you stare at yourself in the mirror while you brush your teeth, it’s like you’re not even there.
Yuji hasn’t tried texting you, so you don’t even bother going on your phone anymore. You didn’t realize how dark your life becomes without the light of his presence in it. It feels like you’ve lost your ability to feel anything, too burnt out from the anger, confusion, and guilt you’ve been fighting the past few weeks.
Megumi can tell something is off when you sit silently next to him in class, your normal smile now gone without a trace. He wants to ask, but he has a feeling he already knows what’s bothering you, and pressing you on it won’t help. After every lecture you get up with a sigh, muttering a soft, “See you later,” to him, the only words he hears you say anymore.
You become listless. You no longer know how to fill your time, so you start wandering around campus. A part of you hopes that the fresh air will clear the dirt you feel clouding your soul, but it doesn’t seem to help.
During one of these walks, your eyes unfocused as you look down to trace the outline of the bricks lining the path beneath your feet, you suddenly get the wind knocked out of you as you collide directly into someone.
“Sorry,” you mutter without looking up, trying to regain your footing.
“Shit, it’s okay,” you hear the voice of the person you ran into respond. “Oh wait, I know you!”
You sluggishly pull your eyes from your ground to the person standing in front of you. Your eyes meet their face and you recognize the familiar shoulder-length brown hair - Nobara. She stands in front of you in a plain sweatshirt and leggings, almost perfectly mirroring your outfit. You can’t say anything, and you’re not even sure what you would say, so you just stare at her.
Sensing the silence, she takes initiative to continue the conversation. “You’re Yuji’s friend, right?”
His name sends a pang of guilt through your body and your eyes shift down, not sure how to respond anymore. Are you friends? Does he hate you? Does he even want to talk to you anymore? The questions course through your mind, but you’re pulled back by the realization that you should probably respond to her question. You muster an empty nod, your face blank, eyes still on the ground.
“Yeah, I recognize you! He talks about you all the time,” she laughs. “Sorry, I realize it’s kind of weird that I just started talking to you because we’ve never actually met, I just knew your face from all the pictures Yuji has shown me of you guys together. I’m Nobara Kugisaki,” she says, holding her hand out to shake it.
You slowly raise your hand to hers, shaking it loosely, still not making eye contact. As you do, her words replay in your mind. He…talks about you? He shows her pictures of you two together?
She raises one eyebrow at your visibly dejected demeanor, and decides to take matters into her own hands. “Hey, I’m about to go grab a coffee, do you want to come? I’ve honestly been dying to meet you,” she follows.
Scanning her voice, you don’t find any hint of jealousy in it. She actually sounds shockingly genuine. For the first time your eyes move up to meet hers. “Okay,” you say meekly.
“Great!” she cheers, wrapping her arm through yours as she practically drags you down the street.
She brings you to a cafe right off campus that you and Megumi had been to before, one that he personally described as “just alright.” You pick a table as Nobara brings over your coffees, setting a latte down in front of you as she takes a sip of her iced coffee.
“So,” she starts, “what’s going on with you and Yuji?”
Of course. You knew this question was an inevitability. What had he told her about you? Does she know about his feelings for her? Is she asking because she’s jealous, or because she’s confident in her relationship with him? Do they even have a relationship?
“Um, we’re just friends,” you mutter, eyes glued to the table.
“Mm, nope, sorry but I don’t buy it,” she smirks, stirring her coffee in the air.
Shit. Clearly he’s told her about you, and now she’s here because she feels threatened. She must know about his feelings for her, and whatever Megumi thought about her was wrong.
“I-” you start.
“No, see, there’s no way Yuji thinks you’re just friends,” she cuts you off. “He’s, like, in love with you or something. He literally will not shut up about you, to the point that it’s almost annoying.”
Hearing her words your eyes flit up to meet hers, shock evident on your face.
“Wait, did you not know that?” she takes in your surprise. “Oh my god, that little shit!” she exclaims, throwing her head back to laugh. “I’ve been asking him to meet you for forever because I feel like I already know you after everything he’s told me about you. I figured we’d be great friends, but he always made some weird excuse about it. I just thought he was trying to hide you from me, but now I get it - he never told you he had feelings for you!” she thinks aloud, still chuckling.
You just stare blankly at her, mouth agape as you take in the information she’s presenting to you.
“Wait, did something happen between you guys?” she suddenly asks, turning her attention back to your face.
Hesitating for a moment, you sigh, figuring there’s no harm in just being honest with her - clearly she and Yuji are close, so it’ll come out eventually. “Um, yeah…” you trail off. “We got in a fight.”
“I knew it!” she almost yells. “I knew something was up with him. The past few weeks he’s been extra weird, like more weird than normal Yuji. I kept asking him about you and he wouldn’t answer, and it was almost like he flinched whenever your name came up.” She pauses, taking a big swig of her coffee. “What did you guys fight about, anyways?”
Swallowing, you try to mentally weigh your options, deciding to just get it over with. “Well, we were at that party,” you sigh, Nobara nodding intently across from you. “And I…um…I saw him with you. And I just got jealous, and I saw you guys leave together, and-”
“Wow there,” she cuts you off again. “When did you see us ‘leave together?’ Because, no offense here, I would rather rip off my own legs than ‘leave’ with Yuji,” she laughs.
“He had his arm above you, and I turned around and when I looked back, you both were gone,” you explain hesitantly.
Recognition suddenly flashes across her face. “Oh my god, yes I remember that! I was making fun of Yuji because I could see you across the room and I wanted him to go over and talk to you, but he said something about you looking ‘too pretty to bother,’ so I shoved him to try and get him to go say hi. But when I did, he knocked into someone, they got pissed, and they threw their drink over me! Can you believe that? It wasn’t even my fault,” she scoffs, rolling her eyes. “I had to go upstairs to get a change of clothes since Maki was hosting and I knew she’d be cool about it, but Yuji just sat outside the door to make sure no one came in while I was getting dressed.”
“W-what? No, that…that can’t be right” you stutter. Your thoughts cloud again. You try to replay your memories of that night: Yuji next to Nobara, her shoving him, both of them disappearing…the timing would make sense.
“I don’t know what else to tell you,” she shrugs, “but you really have no reason to worry about me. I don’t really, how do I say this, go for the Yuji’s of the world, if you catch my drift,” she says with a smirk, taking another sip of her coffee.
“But…the two of you had a date?”
“Date?” she laughs. “He and I hang out for our group project sometimes, which he is totally not pulling his weight in, by the way, but we are definitely not going on dates.”
“But Yuji said…” you trail off.
“Yuji’s an idiot, respectfully. He starts talking before his brain can catch up sometimes. I wouldn’t put too much stock into what he says,” she continues. “All I know is that he’s been acting like an injured puppy for a while, and now I know why. Whatever he said or did, you don’t have to forgive him, but believe me when I say that he and I are nothing more than friends and you have nothing to worry about on that front.” She reaches her hand out across the table. “So, what do you say? Do you think you and I can still be friends?”
You nod, a smile starting to form on your face for the first time in a while as you reach out to shake her hand.
The two of you finish your coffee and you learn that she’s actually so much cooler than you ever could have expected. She’s a business major so she can learn how to run a national all-women tattoo shop, she was a semi-professional kickboxer, and she works as a carpenter on the side for a bit of extra cash. You silently thank the fates that she’s not interested in guys, otherwise you would never be able to compete with her. A few times throughout the conversation with her you find yourself laughing so hard your stomach hurts, a feeling you had all but forgotten.
As the two of you get up to part ways, you thank her for taking the time to talk with you. She punches you gently in the shoulder and tells you to call her any time.
On the walk home, you notice the sky starting to cloud as the wind picks up. The moment you step back into your dorm rain begins to pour against your window, as if the sky is cleansing the earth the same way you cleansed your conscience. The conversation with Nobara leaves you feeling rested and clear. Now, all that’s left is to apologize to Yuji.
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chronically-ghosted · 3 months
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i'm swingin' blind and you're stunning me without any gloves
rating: E for Explicit! 18+
word count: 9K
pairing: dieter bravo x f!reader
summary: the night continues while the two of you dance around the inevitable. dieter's restraint is foiled by dreams of a water bed.
warnings/tags: depictions of drugs, age gap, cum eating, piv sex, not actually incest but close, concerns about getting old, reader is at least 18 (by how much is up to you), no use of y/n, oral (f receiving), hand jobs (m & f receiving), unprotected piv, squirting, the barest hint of overstimulation, oh and SMUT.
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“Do all movie stars have six empty bedrooms they don’t use?” 
“They’re not always empty . . . I mean, it’s good for parties. Gives people space to get out of the chaos if they want, or if they need a place to crash. Keeps the energy, uh, flowing. Keeps the vibes good.” 
He uses the joint to take the place of having to explain that the room you just passed was in fact used as a revolving door for anyone who wanted a bump only two weeks ago. The second floor stretches out into the darkness, the nasty weather outside beating against the windows. He keeps a slow steady pace, the high making his insides comfortably warm as you wander in and out of rooms, like a less frantic, totally-fuckable version of that Scooby Doo gag. He’s quite sure he’ll never be able to watch Saturday morning cartoons the same way.
So far, you’ve been content with asking rather inane questions, filler questions that he suspects you’re hoping reveal more than he’s giving. The response to the question being more important than the answer itself. 
So no one lives in these rooms? No.
Do you ever use these as anything else other than bedrooms? No.
What’s outside by the pool? A gym.
A gym with full length mirrors that he used to adore snapping selfies in, in his younger cop show days, and without much prompting, would admit to masterbating to on occasion. 
You’ll always be your own greatest critic so fuck ‘em.
You come out of the last bedroom, smirking faintly as though someone had told you a particularly naughty secret, humming faintly to yourself. He never much cared for giving tours but given that you walked ahead of him and gave him adequate time to ogle the backs of your thighs, he could think of worse ways to spend time with you. 
“Mhm hmm,” you mutter to no one in particular. The carpet is plush, but that is the only thing you could say you really enjoyed about the style of the house. Everything else, especially the almost clinically clean air to it, makes it feel like a hotel, as if Dieter is mold growing in someone else’s house. Again, these are filed as things that helped fill out the picture of the man your uncle had become, if not the man he wanted to portray.
“So where do you sleep?” 
He had been lulled into such a stupor of quiet fantasy fueled by his warm high that he didn’t even think twice when he pointed down the hall. 
“God, it just keeps going, doesn’t it?” 
Turns out the path to moral degradation isn’t a straight line, but a curved slope. One he finds himself on, going down round and round and round, the longer he watches your legs, the curve of your ass, the bright smile as you quite obviously tried to get a glimpse of the old Dee. But that's the thing about drugs that he finds he so actively craved – of course there is the euphoria, the chemical sensations, the wires of your brain plugged into different outlets and restarting the whole system. But he's found that’s when people tended to be their most honest, most unpolished and they weren’t afraid to be like that. 
There was a lot of talk around the ego and the ID in his early acting classes. Who was your character when their ego had been pulled back like strips of skin? 
But as he got older, the question he became more obsessed with was, who were the people around him when they weren’t being paid to like him?
You, of course, are different from all that. You hadn’t built up an ego quite yet. You hadn’t built up the mechanisms required to survive the world because you hadn’t needed to. Sure, you could deflect and get what you wanted by batting your eyelashes, but there are times he felt ugly in the skin he had built. Like somewhere along the way, he had tried on all these hats and now they had all attached themselves to his head and he couldn’t tear them off if he tried. His costume didn’t fit– his face wasn’t even visible any more. 
And who exactly had spent the last fifteen minutes trailing after his beautiful, carefree niece, a single breath away from getting so hard it hurt, in this massively empty mansion? What version of himself wants to snake a hand into those shorts and effectively ruin you for anyone else – wanted to grip you so hard there’d be bruises and tears in your eyes when you came? 
Which one of them is he willing to show you?
All of them. None of him. The ID.
You glance over your shoulder, curious that he hadn’t answered you. 
“Yeah,” he sighs, smoking between his two fingers again. “Could get lost in a place like this.”
You pause in your inspection, eyes soft because of the drugs or the low lighting or something else, and take his hand. “Lucky I’ve got you then.” 
His mouth is instantly dry in a way that has nothing to do with the weed. He offers you the joint and you smoke too, eyelids drooping, allowing him another second of looking. 
And then another smile breaks across your face.
“Fuck,” your laugh turns into a cough. “Did you ever get that stupid fucking waterbed you wouldn’t shut up about? I remember you swearing the first thing you’d buy when you were rich and famous was a waterbed – which I thought was so fucking cool because I’d never heard of a waterbed before because I was seven and it sounded like something totally made up — so of course, someone rich and famous could have one.”
You’re still holding hands, your palm dry and warm, when he laughs too. He takes the joint back from you, eyes narrowing as he looks at you out of the corner of his eyes.
Turns out moral degradation is a fucking cannon ball. 
“Why don’t you go see for yourself?” 
You squeeze his hand, eyes bright, before almost sprinting down the hall to the room on the right. He follows you, struck by the notion this is the first and last time you’ll ever enter his bedroom. This has to be the end of something.
He hears a grunt and a groan and he can’t help but smile. He saunters into the room, leaning up against the door frame with his hands in the pockets of his robe. You are face down on the mattress, hands under your chest. 
“This is not a water bed,” you grumble, the sound muffled. 
Once again, Maria deserved a raise just for making his bed. 
“No, it’s not,” he says slowly, as he edges a teasing tone into his next words. “Look, I did get a fucking water bed, alright? Just about a century ago when they were still a thing.”
You ease up onto your elbows and glare at him. “Can’t believe you got rid of it. What a waste.” 
And then you’re sliding back onto your knees, hands planted on the covers, and for just a second, he swears he can see the outline of your cunt through the material that could hardly be called shorts. 
His knees actually buckle for a second before he stands up right and physically has to close his eyes. Looking away wouldn’t have been enough. 
But you don’t see all of this. You’re frowning down, as if glaring hard enough will bypass physics and liquidate the mattress. 
“What happened to it? The water bed, I mean.” 
Just as he’s gotten his heart rate back under control, your question throws everything into a spiral again. 
Do not fucking tell her about the hookers and the brass pasties. Or the cock ring. Definitely do not mention the cock ring. 
“It, uh, popped.” 
You smirk over your shoulder. “It was a sex thing, wasn’t it?” 
The question lingers, Dieter unable to make a coherent word that didn’t sound like take your pants off right fucking now, so he swallows and shakes his head. By some minor miracle, you shrug and don’t push it, sliding off the bed and completing your assessment of his life by regarding the book collection against the opposite wall. 
It’s bigger than you expect someone like Dieter to have, but its placement in the house – almost hidden in his private bedroom – suggests that its volume is not there to impress. It’s his personal collection and, judging by the bent spines, books he’s actually read, perhaps several times. There’s a small desk next to it, crouching in the corner and littered with sheets of paper that look like they were torn from a sketchbook. 
He couldn’t decide which version of himself he wanted you to see less: Dieter, full of vices, or Dieter, bratty actor who only acted in the first place because he couldn’t cut it as a real artist. 
Your hands run over the sketches, eyes annoyingly unreadable, and just as he’s about to leap forward and scoop all of the sketches into the trash, you move on. Your interest is caught by some of the books. You make noises that are both outside of the realm of approval or disgust and he finds himself nervous. Book reading is about the last thing on anyone’s mind once they’ve reached the final destination of The Bedroom, so he’s never worried about what someone might think. But this isn’t just someone, it’s you. 
His mouth opens to make some quippy remark, when you gasp and lunge forward, grabbing something at the back of the shelf.
“Holy shit, that’s you!” 
You hold up a picture of his high school’s production of Othello and there he is fifteen and smack dab in the middle of the cast. 
“Oh fuck, I forgot that was there,” he groans, dropping the nearly gone joint into an ashtray by the side of the bed. You’re practically glowing with excitement and he rolls his eyes as he takes it from you.
“Jesus Christ, look at that kid. Has no idea what kind of dumbass he’s going to grow up to be.” 
Three years after that photo was taken, he had left in the middle of the night for Hollywood. Of course, just as he had finished packing up his piece-of-shit Chevy, Enrico caught him. Exploded in his face and scolded him in his old man ways for leaving without saying nothing. 
He kept this photo because it was the last thing that reminded him of home and yet so distant it didn’t hurt as bad any more. 
“I think he did spectacular for himself,” you grin at him. “Who knew The Dieter Bravo was such a softie for the old days?” 
He smirks at you, finally sick of you kicking his ass all night. There is a line between fucking you and out sassing you, one he could live with. You aren't fucking ready for that Dieter. 
“No way,” he rubs the bottom of his lip with his thumb, artfully contemplative, and purposefully distractingly hot. “Just keep it around for the spank bank. Ms. Lemons was a babe.”
You narrow your eyes at him as he leans across you to put the photo back.  “Oh yeah? I gave my first blow job in that blackbox.”
“No, you fucking didn’t.”
“Yes I did!” 
“What was his name?”
“Jeremy.”
“Jeremy what?” 
“Jeremy . . . Barnes.”
“Pssh, fake name, fake boyfriend, fake story.” 
“He was real! I just . . . can’t remember his last name right now.” 
“Blurs together with all the other guys you’ve blown, right?” 
You bite the corner of your mouth, your smirk so tight he can almost picture your toes curling. Not that he’d dare break eye contact with you now. Now that he’s got you practically pinned to the bookshelf, photo forgotten and something that’s been slinking around for the past three hours finally rolling on its back and exposing its belly. 
He knows The Look, he practically invented it, and he can’t quite remember why it’s not okay to get that from your niece and someone twenty years younger than him. Right now, the portion of his brain that can sort that’s fucked up and it’s not that hard to refrain from being a fucking creep is filled with smoke, a sort of hissing sound there that is not unlike a shaken soda begging for release. 
And dear God does he want release. But he’s willing to edge it just a bit longer, scrape that muscle as gingerly as he can before touching it where it needs to be touched.
“I have no idea what you mean,” you say softly, meekly being cowed for the first time all night. Fuck, do you have to make it so easy?
“That’s right. You don’t. Because if it were any good, you’d remember it.” 
He puts a hand above your shoulder to stop himself from sinking into you. Weed made the world feel plushy, moldable – and he just wants to lounge in the dip of your bottom lip. You look so different from the girl who showed up soaking wet at his front door. 
Your breathing hitches the closer he comes, your eyes fluttering as you watch his fingers dig into the spines of the books. 
“What’s his first name again, darling? Do you still remember that?” 
You gasp, loudly, as if his itching fingers had finally sunk in between your legs, but you’re sliding away from him and pulling out something from the shelf. Something white and something he should have fucking hidden better. 
“Oh my God, is this my senior yearbook?” 
You’re wandering over to his bed, leaving Dieter reeling, his own spell so alarmingly effective he is caught beneath it too. It takes him a moment to blink as he realizes maybe this is where you reneg and decide you don’t want to fuck him after all. 
“It’s not as weird as it sounds –,” he begins, heart in his throat, and hands safely in his pockets as he joins you near the bed. You still haven’t looked up as you flip through the glossy pages.
“Sure, sure.” 
“Look, your dad sent it to me and I didn’t even open it,” he says honestly. The package was delivered on the Tuesday afternoon when he woke up so hungover he actually thought he might die, and couldn’t bear the thought of not recognizing you in the class photo. 
Funny how that all fucking worked out. 
You hadn’t leapt off the bed, called him a dirty old man, and ran away to call the police. Which are probably good signs. So, slowly, he sits down next to you, halfway on the bed and halfway off. 
“He sent it just a few weeks ago. I didn’t really think much of it at the time,” he says quietly. So you had been on the high school’s newspaper staff, as well as being the captain of the journalism club and ran the book club. You were on the volleyball team and co-Secretary of the student body government. Here, he spent all night trying to find out what kind of person you are when half your life is waiting for him upstairs. “But maybe he sent it as, like, some sort of . . . fond reminder.”
You snort, your thumb tucked under your chin as your hand touches the memories on the page.
“No, it fucking wasn’t. He was guilt-tripping you.” 
So your dad definitely still remembered the fight all those years ago. Dieter grimaces. His gaze slides from the stock pages, to your knee, down the crease of your thigh. 
“You know, he would have made me your godfather if–,” 
“If you weren’t such a fuck up. Yeah, he told me that too.” 
You finally look at him and find him nearly out of breath, eyes wide as though he had been struck by a sledgehammer right to the chest. 
“Actually, he told me if I came around more.” 
Your face crumples, the flippancy gone.
“Fuck, Dee, I’m sorry.” You cup the back of his neck with your palm in a soothing gesture and it stirs something within him. “I shouldn’t have said that.”
“It is what it is.” Deflection, distraction, escape.
You smile gently, thumbing his curls as your eyes roam his face, seeing right through his bullshit.
“You know, you kinda became the cautionary tale around us growing up,” you murmur, gaze searching his face. “Not sure why, though. Since you’re, like, a gazillionaire.”
Not worth it. None of it’s worth it.
“I get that. I get why he didn’t want me around. Probably best that I fucked off and never looked back.” 
The corners of your eyes crinkle, as though he had said something that didn’t make sense. You stop combing his hair and run your thumb over his ear. 
“But I don’t think you are,” you say slowly, as though you didn’t need to explain. “A cautionary tale, I mean. I think you’re . . . an inspiration. No one in our town ever fucking leaves, but you did. You got the fuck out and lived your dreams. And that’s pretty cool.” 
There’s not any hope for me, not if you knew all the fucked up shit I want to do to you. 
Don’t look at me like that. 
When he looks around for some self control, something to pull himself out of the pit he’s dragging you both in, there’s nothing. All eroded. 
Moral degradation is a smooth fucking shot. 
The yearbook drops from your lap, clatters to the ground as he takes your face with both his hands, his rings pressing into your cheeks, and kisses you so hard his lips knock against your teeth. The force of it rocks you flat against the mattress, your fingers wrapping around his wrists, grounding you to him – don’t take this back, don’t let go – and his tongue runs against your bottom lip once before your mouth opens without hesitation. He can feel that, that desperation, that eagerness to let him in, and he groans into the hollow of your mouth and you take it, you match it, just like everything else he'd given you this night. 
Your tongue rises to catch him, to guide him, to show him the places you need to be touched. He’ll get there, you little thing, so he nips your upper lip and you gasp, your body tightening beneath him. He grins – there’s so much you have to learn. 
His palm drifts away from your jaw, thumb gentle as it coaxes your cheek to the side, before he latches his lips to your neck, sucking and then a quick bite– all eased by his tongue. Your fingers dig up into his hair, clutching him to your chest as there is anything, anywhere else he’d rather be in the world. As if anyone could pry him off you. 
He dives back into your mouth, air rushing out of your nose in a silent moan, and your knee hooks out around his hips, pulling him into the cradle of your lap. You jerk back –
“Dee, you’re – holy shit –,” 
Your hips brush up as if you had somehow gotten it all wrong the first time. As if he isn’t rock hard above you. Your eyes widen as he smirks down at you.
“Yeah, baby, that’s all you. All you do to me.” 
He chuckles, dropping his head to your chest, breathing deeply, head spinning from kissing you so thoroughly. He inhales, nose rubbing against the soft material of your shirt, ideas of peeling it off you with his teeth. Your scent, it’s all at once intoxicating, mesmerizing, and . . . familiar. 
He groans, almost nuzzling your chest.
“Fuck, this smells like that nasty deodorant from 711 I used to buy ‘cause I couldn’t afford anything else.” 
You slowly open your eyes up at him, a distantly embarrassed smile curling up the corners of your mouth. You look hazy, blurred, lips flushed and pink from getting them sucked and bitten. Had he not just licked your entire mouth clean from spit, you might have blushed.
Your fingers curl gingerly around the back of his neck. “Well, you never forget your first.”
His mouth falls open. You had successfully knocked him back on his ass for a second time that night. 
“Shut the fuck up,” he husks, a grin breaking across his lips as the hand at your shoulder pulls gently at the sleeve. “This is my shirt? This has got to be older than you are.”
A small part of his brain, the part that definitely would object to fucking his pseudo-niece, goes warm at the thought that some part of him still lived in that neighborhood, was still there for all the important moments of your life. 
That is until the very active part of his brain lumbers in, quashes all gentle feelings and promptly wrestles for control of his mouth to ask you flat out if you ever touched yourself while wearing it. Not that he didn’t want to know, but if you said yes, he would have come right there on the spot, perhaps so hard his dick popped off. So he did not ask you that, but he did satisfy that part of his brain by molding his hand around your hip, so he could feel the cool fabric on the back of his hand, and your warm, plush skin against his palm. 
You like her being drenched in you, don’t you? 
You swat at his chest, rolling your eyes, oblivious to his rapidly darkening thoughts. “It is not older than me, but if it was . . . would that be a problem?”
You pick at imaginary lint on his shoulder, hips rolling just enough to indicate it better not be a fucking problem, and a smirk on your face that reads innocent and filthy all at once. 
Dieter shakes his head, grinning as he inches his wide palm up your hip, across the thin flesh of your ribs and – 
Does not find a bra. 
You had not been wearing a bra the entire night.
Your smirk deepens, your back arching into his palm, as his thumb brushes the underside of your breast, then over your tightening nipple. You moan softly, eyes fluttering, when he pinches it deftly. His jaw ticks, teeth grinding from the pleasure of watching your mouth arch open. 
It’s like you had been given a list of all the things that turned him on and you are crossing them off one by one. Like you had skinned him and read all his little nasty thoughts written on his ribs and made them your own.
Like you were made for him. 
He leans forward, the bristles of his beard and mustache rough like matches against the shell of your ear, his voice so weighty it could have been another physical thing he intended to drive into you, intended to rub against you to make you keen with pleasure. 
“It’s not a fucking problem, you little brat. Only problem is gonna be if it keeps me from watching those pretty tits bounce while I fuck you.”   
There it is. Out in the open. As if all his flirting and touching and tongue between his teeth hinted at something else besides you spread out under him. Half delirious from being so hard, he grins as he bites the bottom of the shirt – his shirt, Jesus Christ – and pulls it up and he ducks his head under the material and presses a sucking kiss into the valley of your tits. 
He likes giving head from underneath the sheets because, yes, it was hard to breathe. It was hot and stifling and everything smelled of sweat and sex and eventually his brain was forced to make a decision about what motor functions to hold onto and he made it focus on sensations until he was sure he’d be swallowed up by the cunt under his mouth or impaled by the cock in the back of his throat and if that’s how they found him dead, he’d be absolutely fine with all of it. 
Dieter Bravo – died doing what he loved. Giving immaculate, delicious head. 
The heat under the shirt is nowhere near as intense but it’s enough to make him flush with want. He licks the sweat gathering underneath your right tit, holds it on his tongue before he lathers both his spit and your sweat over your clearly-painfully tight nipple. Every touch of his makes you stutter and he can feel you unconsciously rubbing your hips up against him. 
“This isn’t going to end up on Youtube or some shit, right?” You ask above him, your voice rough as though your throat is dry. “You don’t have cameras filming this, right, Dee?” 
He chuckles with his nose rimming your left nipple. Do you have a voyeur kink? He muses vaguely. 
Fuck, I knew I shouldn’t have gotten rid of that mirror. 
“No, baby, it’s not going on Youtube.” He runs his warm palms up the curves of your side as he tugs his head out from underneath the shirt. “All the videos go directly to a password-protected server in the Cloud.”
“Dee–,” you groan as he lunges forward and kisses you hopefully so hard it knocks those silly thoughts from your brain before pulling back to grin helplessly at you. 
You cannot physically describe how impishly adorable he looks with his hair mussed, his lips pink and twisted in a smirk – you cannot really do anything at all, really – but your hand slides up from his shoulder, across his warm neck and settles into his cheek. The last bit of brown is swallowed by a swelling blackness as you rub your thumb across the bottom of his lip. This thing that has been eating at you the longer you’re around him edges you on, daring you to push him just a bit further because it knows you’d just love what he’ll do. It knows more than you, but it’s not exactly smarter than you. It’s just simply fascinated by Dieter Bravo. 
Your own mouth parts, your eyelids growing heavy, as you swipe across his lips one more time before sliding your thumb into the warmth of his mouth. Eyes never leaving yours, his tongue greets your thumb, massaging the pad before licking around it like he’d swirl off the top of an ice cream cone. He sucks gently and you can’t fight the noise that comes out of you. Almost shocked, surprised that you can feel this aroused with all your clothes on and just his tongue. He drags his tongue across the back of your knuckle and the groan is louder now – you want to bite into him – and he pushes his hips into the mattress. 
“C’mere, baby girl–,” 
Dropping your thumb, he dives in again for your mouth, this time the back of his hand grasping your neck. He kisses you and kisses you and kisses you as if forgetting there was another way to relieve the tension in his gut, the spark that's fanning smoke like a brushfire into every place your skin, your spit, touches his. 
“Take– this– off–,” He pants between the hot presses of his mouth to your jaw, your neck, the spot beneath your ear that makes you keen in a new way. His hands are scrambling over yours to get the shirt up and over your head, desire almost making him panic that everything is going too fast but not fast enough – he wants to be inside of you in every way that matter – he wants you to smell like him – to breath his same air – 
He’s not so much kissing as opening his mouth over your skin, his teeth and tongue and lips fighting over themselves to get to you first. He wants to linger, wants to take his time but the pressure – he deliriously thinks he can smell you – and only when his fingers clamp down on the waistband of your shorts – he has half a mind to punish you for walking around in these things, making his sanity unwind in the hallways of this fucking place, until the only truly sane thing to do is fuck you and fuck you good – the thought is so strong, almost violent he pauses. 
He looks up to the devastation he’s left in his wake – bright, purple spots on the inside of your breasts, under your ribs, the small swell of your stomach, your chest heaving – and he watches your face. You realize he’s stopped moving, slowed in his volcanic thunderous roll down to the clutch of your cunt, and you meet his gaze. You swallow, mouth too dry to form words, so you splat a hand on his shoulder. 
"No robe. I’m not – not going to let you f-fuck me in a bathrobe.” 
He grins. Of course, you would sass him after a make out session so intense he doesn’t even care if he comes in his pants. But he obliges, pretty much willing to cut off a finger if you continue to purr at him like you are. 
“Excuse you, this is lounge wear.” He leans back onto his knees and shrugs himself out of the green robe. Your eyes flash to the triangle on his forearm and he’d be fucked to admit he didn’t get it entirely for the look in your eyes right now. Chicks always dug the tattoos. Your tits bounce as your breathing hitches. 
Not Daddy’s girl, his smoke-heavy, lust-soaked brain chants at him, not Daddy’s girl. 
God, he’s so hard it hurts. 
He goes back down, dropping himself between your legs, arms tucked up under the backs of your thighs. He mouths the inside of your thigh – a distraction as his hand, like some sort of fucked up, horny magician performs a slight-of-hand, “iiiis this your clit?” – rubs you over your shorts. You are soaking wet and he’s fighting the urge to just dig in there, suckle you through the wet spot. He hadn’t actually made someone come that way before, but now seemed like an excellent opportunity to try. 
“You know, for someone who has to couch-surf, you talk a lot.” 
He noses the rim of the bottom of your shorts, allowing a full gaze down to your ass. 
“Sorry if I’m sick of fucking boys who look like their mom dressed them.” You are breathless, shaky, unwinding at the seams and you know exactly what to say to dig right into him. 
He bites the soft place at the back of your thigh and you groan. 
“I thought you couldn’t remember any of them before me,” he purrs, watching that damp spot grow darker the longer he talks, the longer he holds off on touching you where you and him and the entire fucking world knows you need to be touched. 
Maybe you ran your mouth too, when you were nervous, overwhelmed. Maybe you laughed too loud when you didn’t know what else to do, and maybe you gave him shit because the second words stopped coming out of your mouth, you’d have to sink into whatever he was giving you. You’d have to kneel to the white lighting between your legs. Maybe you were afraid there wouldn’t be white lightning at all. 
Families share similar insecurities, after all. 
He waits until you open your mouth again before hooking his fingers under the band of your shorts. 
“Hmm, there’s actually a fairly long list of guys before you. Guys who–,” 
He sucks the skin just an inch to the right of your hip bone, just before the patch of curly hair, he sucks it into his mouth and bites so gently he knows that your brain nearly splits in half from the hairline fracture between pleasure and pain. 
You gasp and you’re already arching off the bed. He breathes across those coarse, damp curls and inhales. 
Girlsex. 
Girlsweat. 
It’s like there’s acid corroding his brain, eating away at the clamps holding his sanity together and he’s gonna go fucking ballistic if the acid doesn’t get to him first. But he wants the burn. He wants the chemical smell. 
He wants . . . to put his dick into something. 
But first – 
You’re pliable. Easy to move as he scoops your shorts off your ass – Oh, fucking Christ, there’s her entire backside, isn’t there? – over your thighs and he hurls the shorts over his shoulder. He inhales–
God, this pussy is going to kill me, he thinks or maybe says out loud before he tips forward into that black, fluttering hole. When he licks you, you both moan. 
He remembers specifically doing planks for as long as he could to build up the upper body strength to languish here for hours.
Well, at the time, here wasn’t here here, but if everything before this was practice, then he was ready for the Olympics, dick as hard as a goddamn gold medal. 
He swipes up with his tongue, licking and sucking and swirling like frosting was going out of style. Frosting, that’s it. That’s what you reminded him of. Fat, sweating, sweet frosting. And there was the cherry on top. 
He guides your clit into his mouth, his fingers digging into the tops of your thighs as if to pull himself deeper into the wettest goddamn pool at the fucking YMCA. He sucks once and your hands fly into his hair. You’re making sounds that somewhat resemble his name, but they’re too high, too pitchy, too airless to be anything coherent. 
He wants to tease you about all the boys you mentioned. Wants you to go back on your word, beg for him to believe that there was no one else before him. If there was, it didn’t matter because this is it. This is the best you’d ever have. 
Even when you left him, you’d never forget – 
Disgustingly, he slurps up one lip of yours into his mouth and you cry out, fingernails digging into his scalp so hard that it hurts and sends another rush of blood into his weeping cock. He mouths up before teasing your clit again – around it but never on it – before diving back down and lapping up your other lip. 
“Dieter–,” you garble as if you know it’s filthy. He can hear your breathing tighten in your chest, feel your thighs clench around his ears, and he swears if he gets out of this with hair in tact, that’s the most he’s going to ask for –
And he french-kisses your clit.
You come, gasping, writhing, back arching off the mattress and he bares his forearm across your stomach, reaching up to pinch your nipple. 
Settle down. We’re only just getting started. 
He’s got to control himself but staring up at you, your face flushed with pleasure, he can’t quite remember what he’s supposed to do next. 
You are naked underneath him. Naked and heaving and he licks the dampness staining his mattress just to have your taste in his mouth again. This is going to be a problem, if he can’t think straight without his mouth on you. 
Oh my God, duh, fingers. 
He pulls himself up the length of your body, and his hands sink into your hair. His fingers curl around your ear as he makes you look at him.
“How are you feeling?” It’s an echo of what he asked earlier. You’re still warm but your breathing has slowed. Your eyes are open, even if they’re fighting to stay open as if you are concussed. 
“Good. Great.” You mutter, hand falling to his chest and tangling with his shirt. 
“You wanna keep going?”
Your eyes open wider as if someone rang a dinner bell and you’d been walking on hands and knees, starving for weeks. You swallow thickly, nodding frantically, and the hand leaves his chest, winding down between you and, before he can stop you, slides under the material of his sweats and strokes him. 
Your hands are like velvet.
Fuck, then what’s your cunt gonna feel like– 
Do not fucking come right now. 
“Oh, I see,” you huff, a smirk curling your mouth up, as if you had won some unnamed battle. You roll your shoulder to go aaall the way down his cock and stroke him. You think about licking your hand, but the precum leaking out of the tip of his head at a truly flattering rate is enough lubricant to keep your hand from sticking. “I can’t walk around without a bra on, but you can walk around in these thin fucking sweatpants and no underwear.”
He grits his teeth, dropping his head to his chest, trying to breath through the freightcar rattling down his spine.
“It’s my house, you little cocktease,” he pants, gasping as you run your thumb against the vein underneath his shaft. You pump him again and again and he groans low, with his eyes shut to keep them from rolling back in his head. “I can– yeah, right there – do whatever I want. Move your hand. I want to stick my fingers in you.” 
His words aren’t so crass they make your ears red, but it’s the unrestrained need in his voice. You slowly withdraw your hands and you go wipe the threads of him on the mattress as he sits up to take his shirt off. 
“Don’t. Just– gimme a second.” 
He yanks the tank shirt over his head, setting down in between your legs again and blinking like he’d forgotten where he was. He takes your hand, licks your palm as clean as something as dirty as this could ever get, and then penetrates your hole with his middle finger. His tongue slides in the crevice between your ring finger and your pinkie and when he adds a second finger below, you both can feel the moment your brain is wiped blank and your body twitches along with it. 
“Mhmm, good.” He pulls you down closer to him, fingers plucking your strings like the finest guitar. Your knees are spread wider than when he had half his body down there. He’s watching you practically drown his hand in the wetness seeping out, his other hand holding or balancing your knee. 
He hovers above you, watching you roll and writhe and beg. His forearm is strained, his hand must be soaking, and he thinks your face contorted in pleasure might be permanently burned into his brain. There is still some part of him that knows that’s wrong. He shouldn’t have the faintest idea of what you looked like, high and blissed out of your mind, while his fingers stroke and dig and pluck and rub to drag you higher and higher – 
The pad of his middle finger brushes something spongy and you nearly slam your legs shut over his arm, if it weren’t for his free hand pinning you open. 
“Dee,” you croak, head shaking, “that was – you can’t–,”
His eyes flutter at the sound of your voice so wrecked. He needs to memorize that exact spot, save it for when you don’t have enough sanity left to push back. It’s scary, he knows, but you must be out of your goddamn mind if you thought he was going to let anything bad happen to you. 
“Look at my thumb. Baby, look down.” 
You wrench your eyes open, past your quivering chest, down his long forearm, down to where the black bullseye on the meat of the space between his thumb and palm is winking at you. 
He’s stroking you with his thumb on your clit and the bullseye winking up at you. It’s eye-fucking you and that’s enough to break you. He wants to drink whatever drips out of you as your body locks up, head thrown back, and you come. You break through and his hand curls around your knee, gently, as he watches your body crescendo for the second time that night. He sucks his fingers, almost pensively, as if he is going to carve something out of you. Remake you. Split apart your atoms and rebuild you whole. Sex as an act of re-creation. 
He kneels his way out of his pants, cock pounding red, leaking, the hot center of where his want for you is infecting him like a sickness. 
Slowly, he drags one of your knees over his shoulder, half of your body hovering just above the mattress. 
He wants to ask if you need it rough or slow. He can’t be gentle right now but he does have enough awareness to keep from hurting you. But maybe you, like him, like a little bit of pain. 
He wants you on top, wants to see you sing for him, but he knows your legs are jelly. He knows there’s a white static hum in your brain and he’s so grateful for the pleasure of it. 
He rubs the top of your thigh and noses the back of your ankle up by his ear. 
“Do you want me to put a condom on?” he asks quietly, before kissing that spot below your ankle.
“Are you clean?” He’s so fucking broad and his rings pinch your skin when he pushes too hard and he’s asking for your comfort. You also want to feel every inch of his cock and you beg him to say yes. 
He nods, suddenly irrationally thankful of Paul’s monthly mandated screenings. You get the clap once, and your fucking manager never lets you forget it. 
You huff, realizing you’re so close your cunt can almost taste it. “I-I’m on the pill. A-a-and I’m clean too.” 
As if he had ever denied you anything, as if his willpower hadn’t barely lasted four hours, you tense at the anticipation of his cock. 
He’s just as warm, just as ready, so he grabs your other ankle and draws it next to your other one against the back of his neck. He sinks back just a bit on his ankles, fingers spreading you and grabbing himself and then–
It’s like getting the wind knocked out of you and getting sprayed with a hose of fire all at once. 
“JesusfuckingChrist, you’re tight.” 
He edges deeper as he sits up right, going slow not because he hadn’t unwound you properly but because if he went any faster, he’d obsess over the idea of getting rug burns on his dick. 
“Dieter, oh God–,”
Hands leaving your ankles to wrap around your thighs, he rocks his hips back and drags out his cock just as much as the both of you can handle before thrusting forward. Again.
Again. He can’t seem to fill you enough. He wants to be bigger, thicker, girthier, if only to plug you up more. 
But, fuck, your cunt is better than your hands but only because it’s so warm and wet and throbbing and he swears his heartbeat is in his ears. 
He thrusts almost lazily, dipping his head to kiss your shin before dropping it back, your toes brushing his hair. His hands greedily squeeze your thighs, thumbs rubbing circles. 
It’s like he has to recover from the shock and sensation of fucking you. It’s too good. It’s too much. 
He’s inside of you.
If there’s a relief fund for grilled cheese, he’s going to have to donate every red cent he’s ever owned. 
Your hands clench the sheets, mouth open and, yes, beautiful tits bouncing with every thrust. It’s not them hovering above him, begging to be bitten, but it’s close and he smooths his hand down from your thigh over his chest, down your hip and he kneads your breast. 
“Oh, fuck, Dee, fuck . . . you feel so fucking good.” 
I want to die in this cunt. 
“So good, baby.” 
It’s back, that pressure that connects the backs of his eyes, to the back of his gut, all the way to his pussy-soaked cock. This time he lets it build, lets it dangle out of reach, and his thrusts become faster, hurried. You jerk beneath him and let out a full whine as if he had spanked you. 
He fucks you some more this way, just to feel that tightening in his gut, before he pulls your legs off his shoulders and you whine again, this time out of annoyance. 
He has the where-with-all to smirk.
“What, baby doesn’t like it when I take away her toys?” He pants, almost feeling light-headed. You scowl at him but don’t push back in the least as he turns you onto your hands and knees. 
“It was just starting to feel good, you a-ahh–ss–,”
He jerks his hips into you without warning, fully seating you on his cock and your head drops between your shoulders. 
“If you weren’t such a brat, you’d be kind of cute,” he murmurs as he rubs his thumb over the knots in your spine, the sensation of your cunt sucking him in almost detaching him from this plane of existence. He knows you like to be teased, with his words, with his fingers, his mouth. He wants to give you everything – anything – he’s so pussy-obsessed he can feel it like ozone in his mouth.
He never wants to stop fucking you. He’s being unstable about it. 
“You like that I’m a brat,” you say and push back with your hips. The sensation does make him stutter and you take it as a win. His rings sting as they squeeze your hips. 
He’s sliding down that pressure, winding himself up so tightly in it he wants to stop breathing – 
He starts pumping faster. The sounds that echo in that room are like music to his ears.
The sheets ruffling as your hands clench around them. The jolt of the bed as it lurches back and forth.
Your moans as he fucks every thought out of your head. “Fuck, you’re so big. It’s not fair.” 
The wet slap of his thighs meeting yours. 
And it all narrows down, the universe closing to a single focal point–  all of it runs right to his cock rubbing up inside your cunt like it owns the place.
“Oh, fuck, fuck, fuck,” you groan, head down. “Please – please fuck me harder, Uncle Dieter.” 
With a growl that surprised even him, he drops forward, one hand anchoring himself to your hip and the other coming up around your throat. You gasp as his fingers dig painfully into your skin. He pulls you both up right, nose in your ear and teeth tight in his jaw. 
He punctuates every word with a particularly brutal thrust that gnaws at something truly devastating inside you. 
“Don’t – fucking – call me that – while – I’m inside – you–,”
You turn your head, flush with his and the hand that’s on your throat slides up to your cheek and he holds you there, pins you there as his cock pounds the daylights out of you. 
“Say my name.” He husks. There’s something cataclysmic happening inside your cunt and he has the launch codes. 
You can’t remember feeling so full before. So up your eyes and your mouth and your ears and your heart – God, maybe there really hadn’t been anyone before him. 
“Oh, fuck, Dieter,”
“No, honey, my real name.” 
Your eyes flicker open and something in his chest roars. He’ll kiss you after this. He’ll kiss you so hard you end up on another fucking planet. 
“David.” 
The sweat on his temples mixes with yours and he wants to smear himself in your fluids. This close, his beard and mustache rub roughly against your skin and you wonder how long the burn will last after all this. You’re clenching his arm, clenching his lower back to you, you think you’ll make him bleed in half-moon cuts of blood. 
“All of it. All of it, baby girl,” he whispers to your cheek, your jaw. “Say it. I need to hear it. I need to hear it from you.” 
Your fucked-out mind spins, clutching at the memories of the past, to a name you hadn’t heard in a decade, while the man you’ve known all your life threatens to undo your sanity. You lock eyes with him, the precipice of something so large and looming, you can’t wait to be crushed by it.
“Davíd Moralés.” 
And that bastard’s cock intentionally pushes against that spongy spot and you shriek. Honest to God, yell, as you come, with Dieter wrapped up against your back, sweat streaking both of you.
“Get down,” he hisses suddenly and almost throws you off him. You land on your back, your entire body pulsing as one single organism, and he grabs his cock in time to aim it at your chest. 
He comes, mouth open, eyes squeezed shut, as he sprays you with white ropes. It’s warm on your tits and you shudder through your aftershocks. You feel like you’re sinking into warmth as he keeps coming, your inner thighs drenched and dripping, and finally, he leans away and collapses on the bed next to you.
There’s ringing in your ears. 
You feel swollen all over, your nerve centers humming and firing and crackling as though someone whapped you over the head with a 500 volt electric baton. You want to keep sinking, keep drifting, keep existing in this warm, non-corporeal form. Everything feels so good here.
You had no idea you, or anyone else for that matter, could come that hard. 
“Holy shit.” 
You can’t help but grin through the short huffs of breath you swallow down in gasps. 
You want to sass him but it feels a bit like spitting in the face of God. “Yeah. Holy shit.” 
He sits up on his elbows, glancing over his side at you, the begrudgingly fantastic cock between his legs as deflated as you are. 
“Are you okay? Fuck, sorry, I got a little crazy there at the end.” 
You shake your fist loosely, with your thumb and pinky finger extended. “I don’t hear customer service calling. In fact, I think the line has been permanently disconnected.” 
You both laugh softly and his eyes roam over your face. This is why he only saw vampy women. It was easier to wake up to something almost over-the-top hot, than this. Than you, with your beautifully flushed cheeks, plump lips, and eyes that searched only for him. 
His gut twisted painfully. Okay, you nutted so hard you’re pretty sure your dick isn’t going to work for a week, now wake up. Wake up and smell the fucking arrest warrant. 
Uncle Dieter. You're his niece. 
What the fuck were you thinking? Where could this possibly go?
Instead of inspecting the small-starting-to-grow painful throbbing in his chest, he sits up and pleasantly inspects the mess you both made all over you. You follow his gaze, smirking as he intentionally smears his cum over your skin with his thumb.
“Oh, and that thing you did at the end, where you made me–,”
“Yeah?” He grinned wickedly, almost begging you to use your words, but you had been so good for him. He’d save that for later. “You liked that?”
“At the risk of sounding desperate, yes. A thousand times yes. But totally unfair and totally cheating.”
He snickers and leans down to your thighs. “Yeah, okay, Ms. I’m Not Wearing a Bra.” 
The smell of you is intoxicating and it’s drenching your thighs, the sheets below you. Maybe he could strip the bed before Maria came – oh, fuck, what if it’s in the mattress?
He hauls those thoughts out of his mind, his dick twitching uncomfortably, as he bends forward and licks the inside of your thigh.
“Oh my God, Dee, you can’t possibly be –,”
“Relax. I’m not. Just wanted to clean you up.”
He licks the drying liquid from your skin – you hiss, so very overstimulated – dragging his tongue up, never breaking eye contact with you as he slinks up your body, shoulders rolling – “Dee, wait, you’re gonna–,” and licks the cum off your chest. His own cum. 
“Oh, fuck, that’s nasty,” you murmur, eyes transfixed on his mouth as he swallows. He chuckles, finally deciding you’ve had enough for one night, and he leans forward and presses his lips on your temple. 
“I’m not ready, but it sounds like you might be.” 
He reaches back to the floor where his shirt was so casually discarded. He gingerly wipes your thighs, your hips, your stomach and chest. There’d be time for a proper wash later, but right now he thinks he’s going to pitch forward into unconsciousness in less than thirty seconds. His limbs are heavy, his eyelids are heavy but he can’t stop smiling.
You grin at him as he tosses the very used shirt back onto the ground and gets up from the bed to disappear into the bathroom. You roll onto your side, after unpeeling the bedsheets like you had done it a thousand times. When he comes back, you rub your face against his pillows and he realizes if he’s going to hoard the sheets, then he’s going to have to do the same to the pillowcase. 
“I’m not gonna wake up and find you mouthing that shirt, am I?” You ask, a smirk already cradling your lips. He huffs at you as he hands you a glass of water. You take it, gratefully, only vaguely aware that he probably did that kind of thing all the time with his other conquests. 
That thought threatens to sour your good mood so you put the glass back onto the bedside table and curl deeper into the sheets. 
He climbs in behind you, and rubs his nose over your shoulder and up into your ear, his hand spread across your hip. 
“Only if I wake up in the middle of the night and can’t mouth your tits.” 
He’s purposefully being sexy, being teasing, but there’s a question there. A request. A quiet ask that for all his thick dick swinging, doesn’t have the cojones to verbalize. 
 You smirk at him and roll back slightly to catch his mouth. You thread your fingers through his hair and squeeze once. 
“Baby, I couldn’t stand up right if I fucking tried.”
He grins, eyes warm. “Wow. Even if you fucking tried?”
God, this is such a bad idea.
“Even if I fuck-in’ tried.” 
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But despite all his not-at-all begging, he wakes up alone. 
He wakes up in broad daylight – the storm had passed. Too bright light streams in from between the gray curtains, illuminating the one thing he never wanted to see: your side of the bed empty. 
His heart clenches so fast he thinks he might be sick. There’s real nausea as he stumbles to his feet and pulls his pants on from last night. He’s about to rush down the stairs, frantically flipping over everything in hopes of finding a note, even if it told him to fuck off. 
You’re twenty years older than me, you fucking creep.
Just wait until my dad hears about this. 
I never want to see you again. 
Just as his mouth dries up till his lips crack, he sees something on the other side of the bed that makes him freeze in his tracks. It’s your phone, plugged into the wall. He goes over and taps the screen. The battery has only 15%. 
And then a post-storm breeze rattles the patio door handle and it opens slightly. He sees your barefoot through the cut in the door frame. 
Holy fuck, you’re still here, just outside. 
Heart now jettisoning into his throat, he opens the door to a truly spectacular morning. His patio looks down to the freshly-washed Los Angeles, the sky a cobalt blue, the air cool and faintly smelling of rain. People run and lead their dogs through the streets and for a minute he thinks he can hear the ocean. 
But what makes it truly spectacular is you. Curled up at the small table in one of his white shirts and those sanctimonious shorts. You’ve got a cup of coffee in your hand and you’ve got his favorite book, Eco’s The Name of the Rose, lying flat beneath your fingertips. But you aren’t reading. You’re looking at him.
“Well, hi there. Did you dream you missed a flight?”
He blinks. “What?” 
“You just, sort of, rushed out here, looking like you forgot something.” You frown. “Is everything okay?”
He swallows and it’s all he can do to keep from dropping to his knees and pressing his face into your lap. 
“Yeah, fine, fine. All good. Fine.” 
You turn back to the book, staring at it as if it was giving you a pep talk. Then you shut it and turn back to him.
“So, um, last night . . .” 
Here it comes. I regret it, all of it. You drugged me and took advantage of me. I can’t believe that you would–
“Was great.” 
He swears he hears his blood rushing in his ears. You smile at him, but clearly uneasy. As if you are the one second-guessing it all. 
Fuck, Bravo, put on your big boy pants.
He pulls out the other patio chair and sits down next to you. He clasps his hands, leaning forward on his elbows. His rings clink together. He nods, trying to catch your eyes.
“Yeah. It was fucking fantastic. I mean it. One for the books.”
He waits for you to say but. 
You wait for him to say but.
Neither of you do. You grin and put your coffee on the table. 
“So, in the events of last night . . . surprisingly, I forgot to charge my phone.”
He doesn’t want to touch you because he thinks it might spook you so he runs his gaze over your lovely knuckles, your wrist. 
“Sounds like, then, you might need to stay awhile.” 
You swallow, unable to contain the growing smile on your face. You duck your head and he follows you and your breath fans his face. 
“Guess so.” 
If he tells it, he says he kissed you.
If you tell it, you say you kissed him. 
Doesn’t matter though. Doesn’t matter that the coffee grows cold and he ignites something in you that you didn’t know existed.
When he finally pulls away, he’s still smiling. 
“This might be a bit weird, but . . . wanna see my other kitchen?”
The End
165 notes · View notes
hundredandsix · 11 months
Text
loser!ellie headcanons (part two)
Thank you for all the love on part one! I can never get enough of loser!ellie so here's some more. This is a mix of canon!ellie and modern!ellie. Slutty thoughts at the end. mdni (18+)
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✩ She bought a skateboard because of some video she saw on TikTok, but she's actually really good at it. She likes it when you watch her and she tries to show off. She'll teach you if you let her, but that's mostly so she can feel you up while she's helping you. She will always be there to catch you when you fall. If you get so much as a bruise, she whips around with the first aid kit.
✩ If you mention any sort of interest that you have, she'll want to learn everything about it. Whether it's a song you like or your favorite book, she wants to know it inside and out. Her interests are really important to her, and she likes when you talk to her about them, so she wants to show you that same love.
✩ She will play guitar to impress you. In the game, this was her way of making a move on Dina and I just l love that ("Maybe I could play guitar for you later" 😏). I hate to say it, but she is definitely very pretentious about her music taste. She'd be like "I'm gonna play you a song, but you probably don't know it. It's pretty underground." Her skills make up for it, though. And watching her fingers slide across the fretboard is an added bonus.
✩ Her nails are so short. She's always playing with her fingers and biting her nails when she's nervous. She tries to grow her nails out on her left hand so she can strum her guitar better with her fingers, but she ends up biting them down every time.
✩ Speaking of her fidgeting, she loves it when you try to ease her anxiety. You're constantly pulling her fingers away from her mouth and setting your hand on her thigh to stop her from bouncing it. She'd really like it if you put your fingers in her mouth instead, but she wouldn't voice that.
✩ When she has a crush, she's aware that until she gets to know them, she's just falling for the version of them in her head, but she can't bring herself to care. She is a little delusional, but that's not going to stop her from imagining your wedding even though she has said maybe three words to you.
✩ Her brain malfunctions when she sees even the slightest glimpse of the skin under your clothes. When you lean forward and your shirt rides up your back a bit, her hand is already reaching out to grab you. She can't help it. The feeling of your soft skin against her palm is like heaven to her.
✩ If you got coffee together, she'd either order it black or as an iced espresso to seem cool and mysterious. She'd choke it down, but then you'd roll your eyes and share yours with her. It makes it even better because canonically she hates coffee, but she wants to at least try to like the things you like.
✩ She has terrible insomnia. Sometimes she forgets that you go to sleep at a normal time, and you'll wake up to find 20 text messages from her throughout the night. She'd take selfies in the .5 setting and tell you to set it as your phone background.
✩ She doesn't like coffee, but her insomnia has led her to ingest an unhealthy amount of energy drinks. She likes Monster the best because the cans look cool.
✩ She'd roll her eyes when you call her pretty, but she secretly loves it. Ellie has never really viewed herself as beautiful. It doesn't bother her, but she needs to be shown that beauty exists in other ways than the male gaze. She just wants to be your pretty girl :(
✩ This is off-topic, but she for sure has a thing for milfs. She'll joke about it with you, but she's dead serious. It's probably the mommy issues...
✩ Her phone case is clear but, as all clear phone cases do, turns brownish. She refuses to change it because there's a Polaroid of the two of you in the back and she's worried it will get bent if she tries to take the case off.
✩ Has polaroids of you everywhere. She doesn't actually own the camera, so she always steals it from you when she comes over. There's one in her wallet, a couple on her fridge, and a few special ones under her mattress ;)
✩ Anytime you go out, she will absolutely under no circumstances let you pay. Even if there's $2 in her bank account. She doesn't care. It's a pride thing. You remind her that she doesn't always have to take on that role in the relationship, but she just wants to take care of you.
✩ She will not bring you around Joel until you are officially together because he can be clueless and will expose her loserish ways. He's also one of the most important people in her life, so she wants to be sure you'll stick around before she gets more vulnerable with you.
✩ She loves feeling wanted. So many people have abandoned her in her life that she needs someone who is secure and will sort of act as a foundation. She loves when out of your way to do things for her without expecting anything in return.
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
✩ Just because of all she's been through, I can't imagine her liking choking. But that being said, she loves it if you just rest your hand at the base of her neck or over her pulse point. She likes the weight of it and the trust it shows. Her hand always seems to find its way there on your neck when things are getting steamy.
✩ I could see her calling herself "daddy" as a joke. Like when she hits her target on the first try she'd jokingly say "Who's your daddy?" But if you kept bringing it up and initiated it in the bedroom, I think she would accidentally develop a liking for it. She'd try and fail to suppress laughter if you called her "mommy" though.
✩ She loves to mark you. Sometimes she feels like she doesn't deserve you, so it helps her to look at the marks she leaves behind and remember those tender moments between the two of you.
✩ One time she was going down on you, and all the stimulation randomly disappeared. You looked down and she was leaving hickeys in the shape of an "E" on your inner thigh. She likes having little secrets like that. Sure, you have other friends and commitments, but at the end of the day, you will be hers in ways people can't even comprehend.
✩ Poor baby would combust when you praise her. Just keep telling her how good she's doing and how she's making you feel. She can nearly get off to your voice on its own.
✩ She has a thing for morning sex. You aren't sure if it's your messy hair or the sound of your groggy morning voice, but she can't get enough of you. She loves that you are the first thing she sees in the morning and gets so overwhelmed with emotion that she just has to show you what she's thinking about.
✩ She's not grossed out by period sex. She won't go down on you, but she's seen plenty of grosser things than a little blood. Plus she hates to see you in pain and will do anything to give you relief. Even if it's only temporary.
✩ You'll just be going through your day, and she'll randomly send you the horniest, filthiest text to ever exist. She might even send a photo of how you're making her feel if you're lucky.
✩ This is another thing she won't admit, but she loves when you tease her. She'll complain and whine and cover her blushy face with her fists, but she likes being under your control. And the payoff is worth it, of course.
✩ She's a hypocrite because she's an even bigger tease than you are. She'll wear rings just because you like them on her and rub her middle and ring finger around the rim of her glass in public. She'll keep you chasing for it until you're practically on your knees begging.
✩ If you put "my" in front of the pet names you use on her, you can visibly see her pupils dilate. She doesn't really care what you call her as long as she's yours.
✩ She really likes edging you, but if you even try that with her, she'll push you away and start getting herself off. There's only so much she can take before the chase gets to be too much.
✩ Before you got together, I think she would masturbate as much as you could in an apocalypse. But after it's official, I think she would rather wait for you than get off herself. She has the polaroids of you for dire circumstances like when she has to be away for a while, but to her, there's nothing better than the real thing. She knows from experience that your hand down her pant feels much better than her own.
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
880 notes · View notes
uglypastels · 10 months
Text
Not Wholly Evil |IX| pirate!Eddie au [NSFW]
a/n we are getting so close to the endddd oh my god i am so excited and sad at the same time because i don't want this story to end as much as some of you, but I also cannot wait to share my next lil projects with you 🥰 thank you for all the support on the last chapter!
this chapter will include explicit scenes. Minors DO NOT Interact. 18+. if you have read the previous chapters but do/should not wish to consume this content, please read:
Chapter 9 (safe for work version)
Series Masterlist
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word count: 13k
"semi dark fic" - READ the warnings:. (gun/sword)violence. blood. mention of severe wounds. minor character death. allusions to suicide. kidnapping. imprisonment. alcohol. open and deep sea. near-death experiences in water. men are pigs: mentions of non-con, but it does not actually occur. [in-dream] non-consensual behaviour. malnourishment and weight loss. paranoia. mention of poisoning. abuse. manhandling. lying. small wounds inflicted by fire. blackmail. binds and knifes. SMUT 18+ ONLY, MDNI - p in v sex. oral (f receiving). no condom (this isn't the 18th century. wrap it before you tap it). choking. thigh riding. jealous!eddie.
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Chapter 9: Paragon
“Perhaps the wolf wasn't quite so dangerous as he pretended. Unfortunately, there was only one way to find out for sure——give him a little rope and see if he hung himself… And pray that he didn't tie her up with it instead.”
― Sabrina Jeffries, Dance of Seduction
He looked like he saw a ghost. And maybe he had. You didn’t feel like yourself, so who was to say if you were still alive? You had comprehended how you carried yourself back to the Hellfire. Standing in his room felt like you were looking down at yourself. Aware of everything around you but understanding none of it.
‘I thought you had left.’ He stepped into the room, leaving the door wide open. As he walked, you noticed he was clearing the way for you, allowing you to leave if you wanted to. His eyes were intently focused on yours and threaded lightly. Like any wrong move would cause you to disappear.
‘I wanted to,’ you admitted. You still wanted to. Your thoughts had screamed through the night for an escape. Yet, something tied you down to this ship and made you return.
‘Then why didn’t you?’ He came closer, and so did you. That string pulled at your ribs again, pulling you two closer. You had tried long enough to fight it to no avail. Whatever you thought you wanted did not compare to your subconscious need to be next to him. 
‘I don’t know.’ Deep down, you knew the reason, but the time was not there yet to admit it. In your mind, you still despised everything about him, this ship, the crew, and, therefore, yourself for needing his touch as much as you did at this moment. It was weak to give in to him like you did.
The candle’s light fell upon him at angles that brought something new out in him or maybe revealed what had always been there. The signs of the wear and tear of a life at sea. He wasn’t hiding it any more, letting all that pain be visible, and he looked beautiful. You held back from reaching out and tracing the thin scar against his brow or the flawed line of his nose that must have been broken once. The longer you looked at him, the more you realised that you could look at him in this way forever. 
And that scared you. 
Munson walked past you to his desk, occupying himself with whatever he could reach. It would have been good for you to have something to focus on instead of him, but you stood in the middle of the room with nothing but him to clutch onto. Neither of you spoke, stuck in an awkward limbo, tiptoeing around one another to see who would be the first to step over that line. The line that had kept you, your heart, safe until now. You could impossibly predict what was to happen if it was crossed.
The ship creaked as the tide softly bounced off it. For the rest, it was uncharacteristically quiet on board.
‘Is the rest coming as well? Will we be departing soon?’ It was ridiculous to change the topic in this manner, but you simply did not know what else to say, and this barrier between you and him was dreadful. You could sense it in the middle, waiting for that catalyst to burst. And you wanted it to. Just how?
‘No, I doubt they realised I’ve gone.’ He finally turned back to face you, leaning against the desk, arms crossed, eyes on the ground. If he could just look at you—would that make things easier or that much harder?
‘Why did you? Leave the tavern, I mean.’ With your heart pounding in your throat, tightening your breath, you stepped toward him. 
‘I noticed you were gone. Then I heard you had gone to the harbour with some man and I thought…. I grew worried.’
‘Why?’ You could not imagine him caring for you to go out, away from his crew and his festivities, to look for you. 
‘I know what you’re thinking, and at first, yes, I was thinking about the money,’ he admitted, which took you aback. You took a step closer. ‘But then I—when I realised, or thought, that I had actually lost you, I thought about how I would never see you again, and I realised—’ his words faded as you took your final step towards, letting your chest press against his. He finally let his eyes meet yours. 
‘Realised what?’ Considering your proximity and seclusion, you hadn’t meant to whisper, but it felt right. 
‘That I was scared’ His breath was shaky as his eyes took all of you in. ‘Of loosing you.’
‘I was scared too.’ And maybe that is what kept you from leaving. The idea that if you would go, there was a possibility that you would never see him again, and it was enough to hollow out your entire being with dread. It felt wrong. But that gnawing in your chest stayed there the whole night, even when you had returned to the Hellfire, and it only left once you felt his fingers intertwine with yours. A flutter of a touch at the fingertips.
‘And? Are you still scared?’ He matched your hushed tone with his response. The question was simple on its surface, but only the facade for an obliterating iceberg was the truth. 
‘No.’ Standing in front of him, feeling his breath on you, the warmth that radiated off him, his gentle touch on your skin, seeing the smile hiding in his features, you saw nothing to be scared of anymore. There was nothing to fear anymore. The voice in you that had screamed for help all those days was silenced for a final time when you leaned in to kiss him.
His lips were chapped, cheeks rough with scars and the light shadowy scruff of a beard. His touch was featherlight, as if he was scared to pursue it as if you were to break underneath him. It starkly contrasted the force he had pulled you in with hours before. The intensity had been dizzying, and yet this was what genuinely shut your mind down entirely. But you could tell that he was not there yet wholly. Something kept him guarded. 
You pulled away, but your lips still shared the same breath. When you opened your eyes, you were met with his and how they were shaking with uncertainty as he took all of you in. 
‘Is there something you’re still afraid of?’ you asked.
‘Many things,’ his hand found its place on your waist, ‘but mostly of myself,’ and gently pushed you away. ‘And what I will do to you. I have made so many mistakes, mistakes that hurt you, already in that I will have to live it for my eternity, but I do not know what I will do if I make one again.’ 
There was silence as you took in his words. You understood them, possibly more than anyone could, for they were yours. As your lips met, you thought if what you were doing would lead to your doom, if it would all end in a disaster, but could something that felt so right be so devastating?
He had let his eyes fall to the ground. You reclaimed the one step he had made you take, closing the gap between you once more and letting your hand guide him to look up at you.
‘Do you think that kiss was a mistake?’ Your heart beat faster than it ever had as you waited for an answer, but his lips remained shut, so you continued. ‘If so, do not play with my heartstrings, but tell me, and I will leave. I will return to my cell, and you can lock me up and never see me again until you bring me back home.’ It would only be a couple of days, and it would hurt to mend this extremely fragile piece of you that you had just opened, but like all wounds do, it would heal eventually.
��Answer me, captain.’ You kept your voice as steady as possible, regaining the confidence you had built up since you got onto the ship. ‘Was that a mistake?’
‘No.’ And with that one final word, you both leaned in for a kiss. Your hand was still on his cheek, his holding you tightly, but you still felt that urge to pull yourself closer to him. As you felt the press of his chest fully against yours, he actually pulled his lips away from yours. He hesitated but finally spoke against the corner of your mouth. ‘But… call me Eddie. Please.’ 
You couldn’t help but smile into your next kiss. Just like that, all that weight of the world fell off both your shoulders, down into the depths of the ocean, never to be seen again. You didn’t hold back with this newfound freedom when you pushed him up against the desk. The furniture shuffled with a creak over the floor, and you could hear some things topple over at the impact. Still, neither of you cared, too occupied with one another. He could just about manage to extend his hand and begin to push all the loose items off the desk to make space for himself. The papers flew around you, and all the measurement equipment clattered onto the crowd. 
As the kiss intensified, Eddie shrugged and smoothly sat up on the desk, pulling you in with him. As he slowly let himself fall back, you followed, attached by the lips, hands, and hearts, until you practically lay on top, arms keeping you up from falling entirely onto him. Well, one hand, as the other found him and laced your fingers together once more. He had tried to make more space around you, pushing objects aside, when he cursed loudly.
You startled away and saw the clench in his jaw as he took a deep breath. He must have read your panic-stricken face as he showed you his hand. ‘It’s alright,’ his voice was calm, humour peaking through it. ‘I might have just put my hand right into the flame.’ And indeed, the side of his hand was glowing red. 
Hearing this did not put your mind at rest as you tried to grab his hand and inspect the damage more deeply, but he pulled it away from you, instead taking your fingers in his and kissing your knuckles. 
‘Don’t worry, my darling,’ he smiled while kissing your hand, ‘Can barely feel it.’
He had just made direct contact with fire; you doubted it would be alright, but then again, you had seen all the scars on his body. This would just be another small blister among the list of many. But you blinked the thought away. Tried your best to not think about the pain he had endured. You doubted he wanted you to feel pity for him and what had once happened to him. 
The look in his eyes was adamant. He needed you to let it go, so all you could do was sigh.
‘You’ve gone mad.’ 
Eddie chuckled at your comment as he let his lips travel over your wrist, over the length of your arm. ‘As mad as any other sane man.’ His kisses moved over the material of your shirt. The lack of contact that was so clearly there shot sparks of anticipation through you, but he took his time taking you all in until his lips reached your collar. He had practically strained his neck to reach you from his position. Some of you wanted to back away to see how far he would follow you, but your weaker portion gave into his touch and melted over it. 
He had just kissed your neck, sparking a fire through you on the spot, when a noise boomed over the silent ship, bursting you out of the solitary moment of bliss. In an instant, Eddie held you by the hips as he gently pushed you off him and got himself back on the ground. There was an alarm in his features, and so, when he looked at you and told you to “Stay here”, for once, you listened.
He closed the door behind him as he left to see what the noise was, and when minutes later, he had not returned, but there had also not been any more ruckus or signs of danger; you calmed down. Unsure of what to do now, you lay down on the bed. In the past few days, the bed had gotten more comfortable as you got used to it, but it still felt strange. You lay down on your side, facing the wall. The patterns in the wooden planks almost seemed to move in the shadowy light and, unfortunately for you, brought you into a trance of clarity and thoughts.
What were you doing? How could you have let all this happen? Kissing the man that had caused the death of so many people that you had deemed friends. How could you betray their souls by… by falling for him? You had lost control of all your feelings and emotions. 
It was a trick of the sea. You had simply been captured on this ship for so long that you did not know what was wrong or right. How else could you explain the yearning feeling that still circulated through you? Why else did you wish he was still here with you, touching you?
With all these thoughts occupying your mind, you must have missed Eddie walking back into the room, mumbling something about how it had been a few of his crew that stumbled back up to the ship. Too busy with your own mind, you did not hear him calling your name softly, assuming you had fallen asleep and telling you good night. You did not hear how deflated the last words came from his mouth. You only caught the sound of the door closing behind him. 
And soon you managed to turn all these thoughts off and fall asleep. Except then, they came back even stronger and in the form of dreams. You found yourself back on the Red Tail. The hawk flapped its wings on the flag in the wind and every man’s uniform. The sun shone brightly in its last few minutes before hiding behind the horizon. It was a strange illusion as you stared down at the ship and the two figures that stood out looking at the sparkling sea. You watched yourself talking to Admiral Carver.
‘I would have imagined you to have grown tired of the water by now,’ he laughed.
‘I won’t say I will be happy to return home, but I can’t ever see myself becoming tired of this view. It is beautiful.’ You leaned forward onto the balustrade and breathed in the salty air. ‘Besides, you have done this for much longer than I have, and you’re here too, so it can’t be that bad.’ It seemed it was only your first expedition while he had crossed the world several times. If anyone was to grow tired of it, you thought it would be him. 
‘Perhaps you’re right,’ he had his arms behind his back, ‘but everything is more bearable when there is something back home to look forward to.’ 
‘I suppose so.’ You would not exactly know what he meant. Of course, you could not wait to see your father again, and your friends, but nothing at home gave you the sense that it genuinely anchored you there or drew your heart in for your return. ‘I am sure you miss your family very much.’
‘Yes, of course,’ He took a step closer to you, ‘but I will miss these moments.’
‘Oh,’ you were startled by his proximity, unsure how to respond. Politely, you smiled and tried to keep the conversation going, ‘I’ve enjoyed them too, uhmm-’, but you were suddenly thrown off-guard when you felt his hands on you. Before he had the chance to do anything, you were quick to push him off. ‘What are you doing?’
‘Taking our last chance before it’s too late.’ He leaned in again, and you stepped back. 
‘What about your–’
‘She does not need to know.’ The sea was a free playing field for most men, so what happened out there was not up to the women at home to know. You had seen adultery but never thought the admiral would participate in such activities. He had been drinking; maybe he wasn’t thinking straight. Before he would make any more mistakes, you attempted to walk away, but he caught you by the arm, putting all his strength into the hold.
‘Admiral, you’re hurting me.’ You tried to pull your arm back, and this is where things began to change. Where the dream made itself apparent. Carver’s handsome features turned into vicious angles as he spoke. 
‘So you’ll kiss Munson, but not me?’ 
‘What- what are you–’ you tried to get away, but it was as if he grew in size. And there were flashes. These flashes of light. Like lightning, there was no thunder, rain, or light. It blinded you, and you tried to regain your sight by blinking, but each time you did so, he seemed to change right in front of you. 
There was him like you knew him, but the next second he turned into this nightmarish version of himself, but there were moments when he wasn’t himself at all. You’d blink, and suddenly you saw Captain Munson. Still in that uniform, however, you would try to make sense of it all. Still, before you could, he would disappear again, and you would be looking into Carver’s blank eyes, and you’d see the blood dripping from his mouth as he spat out his words.
‘Don’t trust him.’
‘What?’ You had tears in your eyes, and your wrist burned from his touch. There was another flash of light. Eddie stood before you again, just as you knew him. 
‘Do not trust him.’
Don’t trust who? Who were you meant to trust, then? The questions rang through you as you woke up, head throbbing with pain, limbs sore and dehydrated. If you did not know any better, you would have blamed the rum you consumed the night before on everything, making you imagine all that had happened. Still, the sensation that Eddie had left on your whole body felt too real to be just a drunken dream or nightmare.
He was not in the cabin when you awoke, but you could hear him outside, yelling commands out. When you looked outside the window, you could tell by how the waves moved that you had departed the Saint Claire harbour and were on your way again.
You sat up in bed but remained still afterwards, uncertain what to do next. Some part of you wanted to go outside and see Eddie, talk to him about whatever it was that had happened that night. Still, a bigger side of you doubted you could ever look him in the eye again. Seeing your reflection from the glass doors of a cabinet in the room, of yourself in his bed, made you feel bad enough. So, staying in the room for the rest of the day was not an option either. You were already at the door, hand on the handle, when it opened, nearly crashing into you. 
‘Sorry,’ his apology was muffled. 
‘I was just on my way out,’ you muttered in the same awkward tone and walked past him. 
‘Wait,’ Eddie reached for you, and the memory of your dream of Carver made you retract away from him, regretting it as soon as you did. Eddie wasn’t him, but you treated him the same because of something your exhausted mind had decided to conjure up. Eddie kept his distance. ‘Can we talk?’
‘Later,’ you pleaded. This was not the right time. You could tell that it would not end well if you stayed there. 
But when would it be right? When would the stars align correctly for you to speak? It certainly wasn’t the next two days, as you kept walking in circles around eachother. You avoided him like the plague, and it was unlikely that he had not noticed yet. 
You kept yourself occupied with anyone else but him, really. Talking to Robin, Steve, and anyone else who seemed to require company as much as you. Almost as much, at least. It shocked you as well as them how smoothly the conversations went. While only a little was exchanged, neither side being too keen on sharing too much of their past, somehow, you still managed to fill hours with polite pleasantries. Some even showed you how to work around the ship, probably more than happy to give you some of their workload now. You didn’t mind. It was alright if it stopped you from overthinking everything that had happened in the past weeks. But it was still hard to do when you felt Eddie’s eyes on you. He’d watch you work the sails or anything else from afar, but when you’d try and catch him, he’d be suddenly occupied with something and walk away. 
The biggest surprise, however, came one evening when everyone had gathered for their final meal of the day. You had gotten your portion and were ready to return to the cabin when Robin pointed to the seat between her and Steve. You wanted to politely decline, feeling like you did not strictly belong in this dynamic—the crew’s meals felt more sacred, a moment for them to spend together, but they all saw your argument coming and shut it down. 
‘Never thought I’d say this,’ Wheeler, one of the lankier crewmates, said at some point, ‘but I might actually miss you.’ There was a cloud of agreeable laughter to which you belonged. It was funny, but what scared you was that you would miss them too when that eventual day of your return home would come. 
And it was coming.
Something about the air around you began to feel more familiar each day. And when you talked to Robin, you could sense that she knew how much time there was left. But each time you asked, she avoided answering straightforwardly. 
‘Not sure. But you know how seatravels are, you can never be sure… I mean, we should have been there days ago and yet,’ she laughed nervously, tying knots in a piece of old rope that someone had cut off once. 
‘I suppose you’re right.’ You had your own piece of rope and were toying with the frayed ends, pulling them apart mindlessly. You could hear Eddie talking to someone somewhere around, and you did your best not to look up. It had been days, but your tension still felt raw and strange. You wanted to simultaneously run into his arms and run away from him as far as possible, and you could not figure out which urge was the right one to follow.
‘It probably won’t take much longer, don’t worry.’ Robin said, her shoulder slumping as she untied another knot to remake it.
‘I’m not worried,’ you admitted. 
‘No, and you don’t need to be,’ Robin panicked, not wanting to give you the wrong impression of what she had intended to say, ‘but I’m sure you’ll be glad to be home.’ To this, you had no response because, very much like in your last days on your old ship, you had been eagerly awaiting your return home but did not feel like you were actually happy to go back. On top of that, you actually had the sense that you would miss this crew. By leaving, you would be leaving something behind, and you had never felt that before.
But it still did not feel right. Like a kink in your neck that you were trying to stretch out until it disappeared.
‘Can I ask you something?’ you said cautiously. 
Robin glanced up from her rope. ‘You always scare me when you say that.’ 
‘I hadn’t noticed I did it often.’ 
‘You’re quite inquisitive. It’s commendable, but dangerous.’
‘Should I be scared?’ You blinked. 
‘Not here, but in other parts of the world they’re not too keen on it, so just beware.’ She had tied a knot she couldn’t loosen anymore. ‘But what was your question?’ 
You took a deep breath. ‘Why did you target the Red Tail? And I know it was targeted, since the captain was aware what ship you were attacking.’ There was that other puzzle piece that was missing in your brain. How would he know if you were supposed to be on that ship or not? 
Robin froze and dropped her rope. You watched it fall to the ground and her reaching to pick it up clumsily. Once she did, she fumbled around even more with it. ‘I’m probably not the best person to ask this; I joined the crew late, I don’t know everything that’s going on around—’ she was getting distracted, losing the point of your question, or so you thought, ‘I had only heard things, but you have to know that people around here, we trust each other and that trust is earned. We might cheat once in a while in a game of cards or dice, but some things you just can’t lie about.
‘So, I didn’t need much convincing from the captain when he said that those— that those were bad men.’
‘He told you that my crew were bad men?’ 
‘They needed to be punished.’ Robin shrugged, but not in the way that made you think she thought indifferent. More so that, there was nothing she could do about it. It was a brief apology to you, not for what they had done, but as if she was sorry for being the bearer of the news. 
‘Punished for what?’ you asked, but Robin shook her head. Right, she wouldn’t be able to know, and you didn’t blame her. Was there anyone around willing to share more of the specifics of this situation? You felt like you had the right to explain what had brought you to their ship, but it would go past some lines of comfort for the men. Could you dare ask Eddie? 
But to ignore him for days just to come up with these questions could not be appreciated; then again, he owed you at least this after being the sole reason for your presence on this ship in the first place. He had caused all this mess. He could at least help you clean it up. 
You finished your conversation with Robin slowly, without any urgency to actually put it to an end. It must have been confusing to Robin, who saw how you tried to tie your sentences up to walk away, just to disentangle them just as she had been doing with her rope and keep pulling it back. Ultimately, she stopped it all and excused herself from the argument she needed back on her lookout post. She walked away, giving you this look that made it clear to you that she knew what you were planning to do and how apprehensive you were to do it. And whatever for? You had fought, punched, slapped and kissed Eddie in the past days without hesitation; why could you not just talk to him now?
Because that would actually mean something to you. It would unblur all the lines that connected you into a clear pattern, and you would have to live with those results, and you just were not ready for that yet. 
You took deep breaths as you walked up to the captain’s quarters. The door creaked as it slid open but was met with a resistant force as you collided with Eddie. He grunted lightly at the impact, and you began to apologise. 
‘Sorry,’ you mumbled, not expecting him to be so close suddenly. You had hoped to catch him at his desk, where the furniture could keep some kind of barrier between you. Still, now he stood mere inches away, towering over you and the heat of his body radiating onto yours. 
‘I was just on my way out.’ He scratched his beard casually, but his eyes said enough about how similarly he felt about your sudden appearance.
‘I hoped we could talk,’ you blurted out, and Eddie blinked.
‘Talk? Now?’ To this, you only nodded shyly. It had been too long. You had made him wait for days, which was simply too long. Why would he want to listen to what you had to say now? Eddie was ready to brush past you, but you were quicker, catching his arm and pulling eachother closer until your lips met in a chaste kiss. The suddenness stunned him, but for a blink of an eye before his muscles melted into position around you. It only confirmed your worst thoughts, how perfectly the two of you fit together, how your bodies simply locked into place with one another. The heat that grew between you could not only be felt by you. It was too strong for that. As much as you did not want to admit it, there was something there that you did not want to lose.
‘I’m sorry, ‘you said breathlessly, ‘for everything I’ve done in the past few days.’
‘You have done nothing to apologise for.’ He sighed.
‘Exactly,’ you jumped back at how loud you sounded. Still, his pull on your waist kept you close, ‘I have done nothing, while I should have stayed here with you, and we should have talked of, of whatever it is that stands between us, but—but I was scared. I thought I hadn’t been, but I was, and that, in turn, scared me even more, so I thought I needed time to think—’ 
‘And did you?’ He looked down at you inquisitively like he was observing a strange, yet highly fascinating, phenomenon in front of him. Something that he should not be enjoying as much as he was. The unwanted smirk appeared on his lips no matter how hard he tried to hide it. It made you aware of just how much you had tried to say in what short of an amount of time.
‘Yes,’ you said with a slow breath to help you calm down. At this, Eddie simply reacted with a gesture telling you to go on, to tell him what kind of discovery you had made. Would it be anything that could help your conundrum? Clear things up in your heads and maybe even hearts? You could not be sure, but it was a start if you just let those parts of you speak freely.
You took one more deep breath. ‘That night you asked me if I was scared, and I said “no”, but…’ you pushed past the shake of your voice. ‘But I realise now that that wasn’t the truth.’ As you announced this, the hand on your waist tightened its grip before leaving your body entirely. The immediate lack of contact made you regret your choice of words. Maybe you should have prepared what to say, but letting it come out unrehearsed and unplanned felt like the right thing to do. It would not cut out any of the emotions you felt. What you wanted him to know that you thought, so you stammered out your following words.
‘There is so much that I am scared of. It scares me how and how much I have changed in the past few days, and I am scared that I do not mind it. It scares me how much I enjoy being here and how much I want to be… with you.’ Your last words faded as you had not expected to hear yourself say them out loud. Eddie, who you had watched as he walked around the room in slow paces as he listened, must not have expected them, too, for he stopped to stare at you, dumbfounded.
‘Why?’ was the only thing he said in response. 
‘Because…’ you let out an exasperated sigh, walking up to him. You had somehow managed to find yourselves at his throne, ‘because this is not who I am supposed to be. I shouldn’t be. You are you; I am me, and nothing here is right.’ Yet the puzzle had never fit tighter together than it did now. But at the same time… ‘As much as I want to spend my days with you, I cannot stop thinking about all the chaos you have caused in my life. Whether on purpose or not…There is blood on your hands, Eddie.’ there were tears in your eyes. Eddie looked down at his hands as if you had meant it literally. They were pale and had a shake to them, but he quickly put them down to his sides.
‘And yet you’re still here.’ He said it with a distance, more to himself than anyone else, narrating the events as if putting it all into words could make it make more sense somehow, and maybe to him, it did. However, you were still utterly clueless and running in the dark.
‘I am.’ You nodded your head lightly. ‘And I wish I could explain why. To you and to myself, but I simply do not know.’
‘Let me pose you these two questions then,’ he spoke sternly, and you got the unexpected feeling that this would be a test you had to ace. ‘Are you still scared of me? Do you regret anything that happened between us?
‘Answer yes to either of my questions,’ he held two fingers up, ‘and I will make all of this very easy for you and disappear. You will never have to see me again but be honest.’ Looking into his eyes the way you were, it was difficult to lie, or it would have been if you had any intention of doing so. The word came easier to you than anything else had in your life, but you still needed to know some things before sealing your fate.
‘Before I answer, I need to know your business with the admiral.’
Eddie scoffed, looking out the window, ‘I could not care less about the admiral.’ Something in him tensed up despite his attempt to make his reply come out casually. Everything besides his eyes, which flickered with so many emotions simultaneously, you could not distinguish between them soon enough.
‘But the attack on my ship was deliberate, was it not?’ You did not need this to become another one of your rows and spoke as carefully as you could manage. If one of you began to raise your voice or fill your words with anger, it would take over the other, exploding fatally in the middle, and that is not what you wanted.
‘What do you remember from that day?’ He looked at you, head cocked to the side as he studied your face. He saw you blink slowly, trying to understand what he was implying.
‘I remember everything.’ How could you not? It was one of the most terrifying days of your life. ‘I remember being on the deck and seeing your dark sails and how I hid under that desk as the canons went off–’ 
‘Whose canons?’ He stared at you blankly, and you mirrored him perfectly. 
‘What?’
‘What canons did you hear go off? Who shot first?’ He did not say anything else, just stood still as you tried to reply with confidence that you lost as soon as you gave your answer some thought.
Everything had happened so quickly, and it was so loud. All you had tried was to block it out. But you heard the bangs. They came from all sides, but the first one... the first one was the closest.
Eddie must have seen the recognition on your face. ‘I know that those people were your friends. And I am sorry that that is how things-’
‘But you said I was not meant to be on board. You knew what ship it was.’ You cut him off at the memory. ‘You would have attacked either way, wouldn’t you?’
‘It is not that simple.’ He shook his head.
‘Isn’t it?’ 
‘No, and I wish I could explain, but I fear that whatever I tell you will only make you see the worst in me and them.’ 
‘You could at least try.’ You reached for his hand, and a bit of you leapt in relief when you saw he did not pull away. ‘I want to understand, Eddie. You do not know how horrible it is to live in this realm of uncertainty and oblivion.’
‘Would you rather live with the horrors of the truth?’ He asked genuinely, with the pain that exactly this truth had caused him in his eyes.
‘Is that not a choice I deserve to make by myself?’ You once again found yourself up against him. Funny how it always came back to this and how you would not have wanted it any other way.
‘You’ve said it yourself; I’ve hurt you enough times. I can not risk doing it again. I will not let myself do that.’ He brushed a strand of hair from your face, brushing his fingers over your cheek. ‘Now, will you please answer my questions?’
‘No,’ and with that, you answered both. Whatever tugged at you from the inside to feel such anxiety had nothing to do with Eddie.
On the contrary, you felt a sense of calm whenever you saw him. And you had wanted, really wanted, to regret those kisses, but you still dreamt of them at night, and it was all with a magical wonder that you wished to experience once more. Despite everything in your life that had led to this that would have told you to turn around and run away, you stayed firmly in your place in front of him with no intention of ever running away again.
Eddie leaned in, and you anticipated a kiss that never came as he spoke against the corner of your mouth, sending shivers down your spine. ‘I need you to say it, darling.’
‘I’m not scared of you, Eddie.’ The tremble in your voice had nothing to do with fear but all with the way he held you. His hand had moved down your cheek onto your neck, fingers wrapped around your throat, thumb caressing your jaw. His eyes pierced through you. ‘And I do not regret anything.’
You knew Eddie had seen all the far corners of the world. You must have come across the grandest of riches. Yet standing in front of him, you could not help but think how seeing Captain Eddie Munson beam his most genuine smile was the rarest and most beautiful treasure of them all. It was infectious; you could not help but smile at it. 
He let himself come close again, but just as your lips were about to touch, he spoke instead. Right against you, the hot air of his breath pricked at your skin with his light laugh. ‘Before all of this, had you ever imagined yourself here with me?’
As much as you had wished it was not true, ‘I did, actually.’ Your mind flashed to your dreams, the ones you had once thought were conjured up to plague you, but now you realised it was just your heart screaming out your deepest desires.
Like a reward, Eddie kissed your cheek for your reply. ‘Really? The princess had thought of me, a filthy pirate?’
‘I’m not a princess.’ You rolled your eyes playfully.
‘Out of all the things to dispute, you argue my words of affection?’ He chuckled, and you could feel the vibrations deep within his chest. 
‘There was nothing else to correct.’ You wanted to laugh but instead froze at the sensation of Eddie lightly putting pressure on your throat as he was still kissing pieces of your face. Just like that, everything in the past minutes disappeared from your mind. When he pulled away, you saw the mischievous glint in his eyes that once used to bring out fear of the worst in you.
‘Glad to know you haven’t changed too much, darling.’ With his hand around you, he gave you little choice but to look up at him. There was a moment in which both of you took everything of the other in. You tried to soak in all his features from this small distance, for some reason feeling the need to remember them all. Meanwhile, he read your face for any signs of reluctance, which he found none of. ‘You enjoyed that, didn’t you, princess?’ 
A question which brought a lot of enjoyment out of him.
Still taken aback by his actions, you stood there with your lips slightly parted, bewildered, so all you did was nod. And again, your response was rewarded with another kiss, finally letting you meet his lips while tightening his hold on you.  The weak sound that came out of your mouth at the feeling was an instinct. You had never heard yourself make such a sound, and he must have known it somehow as his grin grew wider against you. 
The kiss grew in strength by the fleeting second as you both lost control over your bodies, just letting them speak for themselves. It was messy and heated. The pent-up tension that had been sitting between you was finally finding its release. Eddie’s hands roamed over your body, almost in a hunger-like manner, devouring you with his touch alone. Maybe this hunger felt too real when Eddie’s teeth grazed over your neck, sending an unknown spark through your body at the sensation.
You held onto him tightly, one hand on his shoulder as the other rooted itself in his dark locks—which made you soon realise that the tiniest of motions of you caused a reaction in him as well, in the form of a low hiss as you pulled the hairs on the back of his neck. It had been an accident, as you tried to keep yourself up when the pleasure he brought you made you feel light as a feather.
Eddie hummed at your response as his hands continued their wandering path across your body. The pressure of his palms, combined with the slow and tantalising pace at which he moved, drove you to press your body eagerly against him, which, in turn, only spurred him on to continue down this track of your curves. His movements got rougher as he kept going.
With your urge to keep your bodies close, you quickly caught on Eddie walking backwards. You followed him mindlessly until he found his throne seat and pulled you along with him, right on top of his lap. At this proximity, you could feel all of him underneath you.
‘Tell me,’ he kissed you briefly between words, ‘have you ever been with a man before?’
‘Yes,’ you dared to reply with the truth. Anywhere else, it would have been considered a great shame, a sin of the highest degree, but with Eddie, somehow, you felt like he had wanted that to be your answer. You tried to focus on his face, that smile he shot up at you and the short answer you gave him, instead of how his hands roamed over your thighs. Even with the fabric of your trousers in between, his effect on you was immense. He must have felt how you tensed up when he reached your core. 
‘Did anyone ever touch you like this?’ 
‘Uhm, no, not in this way.’ You struggled with the words as he let his fingers press over your most sensitive parts, everywhere all at once. You could barely keep track of it. Another moan escaped you as his hand moved over your breast. Even with the fabric keeping your modesty intact, he had still found a way for his fingers to move smoothly across your nipples. The feeling lulled you into comfort, brewing the heat inside your chest. And so, you gasped as, with one aggressive pull, Eddie ripped the material of your shirt in two, revealing you to him entirely. Your eyes were wide in shock as his darkened with want.
‘Not scared of me yet, are you, princess?’ His hand was on your ribs, waiting for permission to touch your bare skin. 
‘No,’ your voice sounded like a hushed, airy whisper. Eddie smiled but still hesitated with his subsequent actions. As the shirt sleeve fell off your shoulder, he kissed you again. Except this time, his lips met your breast. The arch in your back, the tug of your hips towards him, was an almost mechanised reaction to it. And with it came the friction of his thigh against you. 
‘Eddie.’ His name sounded shaky coming from you as you could barely inhale a steady breath, too occupied with him.
‘That’s right, princess.’ He groaned as his lips remained on your skin, kissing the valley of your chest. With each kiss, your want for him grew, but your movements over his thigh barely covered the needed friction. You dug your nails into his shoulders, making him groan out in pained pleasure. He cursed before taking you by the hips. ‘Stand up.’
You did as he asked, something that did not go unnoticed by either of you. Eddie chuckled as he looked up at you, chin on your stomach, lips nearly pressing against it, so close you could feel the vibrations of his voice. 
‘So you can be good for me.’
A snide remark was already forming on the tip of your tongue, but Eddie was quicker. Smoothly, he pulled down your trousers and let them pool at your ankles. You stood in front of him in only your torn-up shirt. His large eyes were on you up until the moment his face made contact with your core, and at that moment, everything went black. You could just about make out that you held him close to you, pulling at his hair; as for the rest, the world was turning upside down and around at a speed that made everything seem like a sea full of stars. Your moans filled the room as his tongue licked through your slit. 
You assumed that with how he held you with one hand, his fingers would leave marks for days, but the other was much lower. You could hear the sound of a belt unbuckling. He was clearly struggling to work around his clothes with only one hand, especially with most of him already preoccupied with you and your pleasure. Never before had you seen such kind of ferocity in a man. Not when he pulled himself closer to you and practically fell to his knees from the throne. You surely would have fallen back if it had not been for him and the desk that hit your legs and now acted as an extra grip. It was especially needed when Eddie pulled your leg over his shoulder, gaining even more access to you. 
The desk kept sliding back with the force at which he held you in your place, grazing the floor, but it was all blocked out by your moans. They were filled with curses and the repetition of his name as your vision blurred with ecstasy and your body tightened with need. There was no possible way that the rest could not hear you through the thin walls of the cabin, but you could not care less about them. At this moment, they simply did not exist. 
‘You taste absolutely divine.’ Eddie spoke while kissing your inner thigh, making your legs even weaker. You noticed his lips glistening, never looking more kissable than ever before. 
He had run your mind through a mill; words were hard to come by. All you could muster out was a weak hum as you let your hand brush through his hair. At that, he nuzzled himself between your legs again, this time much gentler, and took his time kissing every inch of skin he had access to, giving you the time to catch your breath while still keeping you on that high edge.
‘I—I never…’ you still struggled to form a sentence.
‘Hmm,’ he kissed your stomach, ‘I know.’ And he slowly rose to his feet, catching your face in one more passionate kiss. You had gotten so used to how he tasted—rum, tobacco, sea air— that your flavour threw you off for a moment, but soon enough, you were sinking into him just as before. And again, you could hear the struggling twinkle of a locked belt buckle. 
‘Would you be a doll,’ he said with his amusement running down your cheek, ‘and help a poor man out.’
You reached for his trousers, undoing the belt and unbuttoning them so they could drop down his thighs. You had felt it before, how aroused he had grown, but seeing it made you take a step back. 
‘Nothing to be afraid of, darling.’ He grinned, placing a hand on your cheek. The other made itself comfortable between your legs, toying with your wetness. 
‘I know.’ You looked into his eyes. The warmth of them had burned up into a dark and hungry desire. Putting a light pressure onto his shoulders, you pushed him back down into the chair. Eddie practically bounced in the seat, taking you all in as much as you took the moment to look at him. Your flicker of confidence in the moment when you thought you knew what you were doing fizzled, but he must have read that off of you, as the next second he was the one pulling you down. 
‘Was this how you expected it to be,’ he murmured against your ear, ‘when you thought about us.’ 
‘No,’ you admitted. It was nothing like you had imagined. All your dreams had been of what you had thought he was; careless, dangerous, feeding off your fear. There had been none of this passion that you felt now. None of the heat, the tenderness or the feeling.
‘Anything you’d still like to change,’ he kissed the soft spot of skin behind your ear that made you shiver. 
‘No,’ you gasped. You could feel him against you, just waiting for the moment to enter you. The two of you were dancing around it, letting other make that next move, the plunge off the cliff, with no return. You shuffled over his thighs. One more kiss would seal the final deal when you moved your hips up and he adjusted himself infront of you.
The moan you let out at the feeling of him inside you, of him stretching your walls and filling you whole, was impossible to miss. Ships from miles away could probably tell what was going on, but again, they were not a part of your universe in this moment. Just you. You concentrated at the pace he was making you keep up with. The roll of your hips against the grind of his. Each thrust went deeper and harder making Eddie more aggressive in the most blissful of ways. There was nothing else to think about, because why would you when this felt so good? Reality went lost on you, until you felt his fingers dig into your side, a pain rushing through you. 
Both of you froze.
‘What’s wrong?’ Eddie immediately looked to where he had held you, pulling the remaining pieces of your shirt up to reveal the scar. The rough skin was a stark contrast to the rest of you. He met your eyes again. ‘Does it still hurt?’
‘It’s just sensitive.’ You wanted to push his hand away, cover the mark up again so neither of you had to be reminded of it. It had been a stupid mistake, that much you knew, and it was not as if you could change the past, so why let it pester you? But Eddie was not the kind to give up easily. He pushed the shirt material back up, keeping your hand away from him, to inspect the damage he had caused. 
‘I’ve done a lot in my life that I will forever regret,’ he kissed your shoulder as his thumb traced over the scarred line, ‘but this will probably haunt me the longest.’ His words and touch, combined with how you sat in his lap, still full of him, got you lost for words. Because, of course, you had hoped that this was his sentiment, you understood and appreciated his words, but what else was there to say? The only thing you could think of replying, which felt silly to do seeing your current position, was ask for some clarification.
‘What happened? I would have thought you had more control over your sword than that.’ You aired the conversation with a bit of laughter, but it only spurred him on to thrust deeper into you.
 ‘I had thought so too,’ he kept moving his hips forcefully, ‘I had hoped so,’ he kissed you sloppily, ‘but I lost it all when I saw you with him.’
‘Who?’ you asked. Maybe under different circumstances, you could have thought more clearly to realise what he was speaking of, but that did not seem possible. 
‘Harrington,’ the name came out of him with a bitter taste. Apparently, the feelings from that day had not disappeared as far as he had thought, but now he could let these frustrations out in a less hazardous manner. It still took a toll on you, but there was no pain to speak of. Just pure pleasure. 
Still, the mention of the crew member had surprised you. ‘Why– why would you—’
‘The way he held you, smiled at you, don’t you think I had wanted to do that? From the moment I saw you—but all I did was drive you away. It was just another reminder of my failure and before I knew it I—’ he stopped himself, still unable to properly speak of what happened. You kissed the bridge of his nose. 
‘For what it’s worth,’ you tugged at the words to come out cohesively, ‘I never thought of him as—’
‘It does not even matter what you think of him,’ he laughed, more so at himself, ‘You could fall for and by happy with any man on this earth and I could make my peace with it. I just don’t want to be the reason for your suffering.’
‘I think—’ a moan burst through your thought with another deep thrust, ‘I think you have managed to pay back any of your wrongdoings.’
‘Oh, darling, I haven’t even started to repay my debts.’ And so, Eddie kissed your neck, over and over, and with those kisses moved down to your brest. Your head rolled back with a soft whine at the attention he gave you, if not with his mouth, than the hand that kneaded your flesh and played with your nipples. 
As he kept going, and as your hips met his and the pleasure burst through you, you could feel everything coming to a close. The tightness in your body swelled while your control over it strayed. There was no possible way you could hold on for much longer and from the looks of it, Eddie had no plans on making you wait. He bucked his hips into you harder and harder, almost impossibly for you to keep it all in. You could explode with this pleasure and that is exactly what he wanted.
‘Mmm c’mon, princess. Feel so good around me,’ he hummed, ‘could anyone make you feel this good?’ 
‘Just you,’ you moaned out, holding tightly on to him as you felt the tension build up in you. 
‘That’s right,’ he had a smug smile across his face that you wished you could wipe off, and you would if you did not need him to keep doing whatever it was he did. Were his fingers back between your legs? Rubbing tight circles, sparking up your sensitivity. ‘Just me.’
‘Just you, Eddie,’ his named squeaked out from between your teeth when he reached the deepest part of you.
‘I’ll never get enough of you saying my name.’ 
‘Eddie,’ you repeated it in in a haze with his final thrusts that finally brought you over the edge. Stars fell over you in pleasure as Eddie slowed down his movements, letting you come down from the high. He held you tightly in his arms as you let your head fall on his shoulder until you fell into a comfortable silence. There was only the rush of the waves and your tired breaths that filled your ears.
Once your heart settled back to a steady pace, you knew it wasn’t safe. As good as this moment felt, it wouldn’t last. Whatever this was, there was no possibility in which it would outlive this voyage. Then, once it was over, it would hurt. That much you knew. Possibly more than anything had hurt before, and you would just have to be on the lookout for that end until then to let yourself become at peace with it. There wasn’t another choice, as this idea always stayed with you in the back of your head from that moment on. When you fell asleep in Eddie’s arms that night, you thought how many more days you got to wake to in such bliss as you did the next morning.
You could not tell if Eddie had these troubles, you could not tell, for he went through his following days much like before. The only difference was that his free minutes were now occupied with you.
It had not been your intention to make it so obvious to the crew, but there was also so little you could hide from them. Nothing could escape the dozens of interested eyes, so why hide your affection towards their captain? He certainly was not making any attempts. Any chance he got, he found himself at your side, holding you, kissing you, then behind closed doors, do all the other unspeakable things to you that made the others turn green of envy. 
Your mornings and afternoons were much the same as they had been before the night of the storm and the Hellfire’s arrival at Saint Claire, as you still spent it in each other's company. The difference was now that instead of being separated by the large oak desk, Eddie would often pull you into his lap to sit in the throne, if not making himself comfortable with you on the bed. The nights began with kisses and limbs tangled with eachother and merged into a joined slumber. Unfortunately, as happy as your days felt, it would not stop the nightmares from coming, but each time you would awake in a cold sweat or with shaking hands, he would be right there to coax you back to peace. What surprised you, however, was that you would do the same to him. 
Somehow, the thought of the notorious captain waking up screaming in the middle of the night, chest heaving, eyes wide with fear, had never occurred to you. You had never imagined him reaching for your thigh to ground himself as his reality spiralled in the dark.
‘Shh,’ you held him tightly, ‘it’s okay.’ 
Neither of you asked what the dreams were about, knowing you could do nothing about them. You could just help the other through it. And then, each time, the dreams that followed were much sweeter. 
Then you’d wake up in each other’s arms long before the rest of the world seemed to. Those few blissful moments where nothing could disturb you and the time you could spend in that bed was endless. 
Except it very much was not. And you realised it exactly through what you thought would be your escape. 
It was a sunny morning. The golden sunrays illuminated the cabin as you reached for Eddie, just to find the side of the bed to be empty. Only his impression in the covers, the faint temperature his body had radiated onto them, was still there. It could not have been long since he had gotten up, and indeed, you caught him standing at the window—leaning against it, more like. His trousers were loose on his hips, and his shirt was still on the ground around you. 
Grabbing that shirt and throwing it over your naked body, you walked over to him, and he looked in your direction as soon as he heard your footsteps. The smile in his eyes was genuine but weak. As soon as you were close enough, he pulled you into an embrace, twirling you around so your back would hit his chest and you could look out at the sea. With how the sunrays sparkled across the waves, it all felt like a dream, too good to be true, but you did not know yet that the dream was at the end of its tether.
‘I really am sorry,’ he mumbled, having his face already nuzzled in the crook of your neck, kissing the spot where it met your shoulder.
‘What for?’ Apologies had become a frequent appearance in his vocabulary, showing up in almost every conversation, if not sentence.
‘You know.’ Yes, you did know. For everything. He held a moment of silence, enjoying your presence in his arms for a little longer, before speaking again. ‘I just keep thinking about how everything between us happened, and if it had not been for me, we could have had more.’
‘I’m just as guilty.’ You had been stubborn, aggressive, and just as blind to your feelings. 
‘Highly doubtful statement.’ He laughed, and his breath tickled the hairs on your neck.
‘I don’t think so.’ You shrugged in his hold.
‘Still just as stubborn, aren’t you, princess.’ He squeezed you tighter. 
‘Is that not one of my most desirable attributes?’ You spun yourself around in his hold and quickly wrapped your arms around him. Doing so, hearing his tone and joy in his  voice, you had expected to see him smiling, but he looked just as sombre as when you had walked up to him. ‘What’s wrong?’ Your hand mindlessly began to trace over the scars on his chest, knowing it brought comfort to both you and him by now.
Eddie shook his head, holding back a laugh. ‘You know…’ he kissed your forehead,  ‘when I woke up, I saw you lying there, with the sun shining on your face, and you looked so peaceful, I had honesty considered just locking you away and keeping you forever, but I am a man of my word, am I not?’
‘I…don’t understand.’ You tried to see the meaning behind his words in his eyes, but there was nothing, and it only got harder to figure out when he held his forehead against yours, keeping you close. You still tried to make sense of what he said when you saw it. There, in the far back corner of your eye. So far, it could have been a play of light, and yet it was more real than anything. So undeniably real it crushed everything around you without question. 
From the angle the ship stood at, that was as much as you could envision through the windows, and thus you ran out of the room. As much as you did not want to leave Eddie behind, knowing it could be one of the last moments the two of you had, you ran out onto the deck to meet the silhouette of mountains against the rising sun. The longer you looked at it, the clearer the details became. The ridges of the mountains, the forests, the watch towers and houses. The uniformed ships that stood in the harbour.  
You knew this day was coming, you had been waiting for it, and yet, now that it was right there in front of you, you wished to be as far from it as possible. In what must have been shock, you took a couple of steps back just to collide with something—someone. You turned around to see Eddie and his soft but sad smile.
‘Welcome home,’ he announced.
Home, sweet home.
Your head turned between him and the land in the too-near distance, waiting for one of them to disappear, maybe even both. Why was this so difficult for your mind to comprehend? Why were the first words to come from your mouth, ‘Can we turn back?’ 
‘As much as I would want to,’ he sighed, ‘I’m sure they’ve noticed us by now.’ They must have. The watchers in those towers had the eyes of hawks, one of the reasons why your town was named after the bird.
‘So, what do we do?’ This is not how someone who is to be returning to their family after months spent with criminals was meant to respond. Everything about this was so wrong.
‘Go put your dress on.’ Eddie cocked his head back to the cabin. ‘I doubt they will appreciate you wearing this, as much as I adore it on you.’ That is when you realised you stood out on the main deck wearing only his shirt. ‘I’ll meet you in a few minutes.’ And with that, he gave you that look he had given you all those times before when you had been too headstrong in your own actions. Please, listen to me. It will be alright.
You walked back, feeling like you were floating, but not anywhere near the same way that you had the previous few days. It did not feel like you were weightless, on a cloud, free of worry or from the world. You were drifting. Far out into the abyss with nothing to hold on to. In this same state, you walked over to the wardrobe, where you had hung your dress, removed the item of clothing you had on and put on the old and tethered garment. It had once fit you like a glove, but you were far from the person it was measured for.
Just as you finished putting it on, the door opened, and Eddie walked in. 
You didn’t want to look at him. Not because of anger, you had, after all, no reason to be angry at him at that moment, but because you were sure that if you looked into those brown irises again, you would break down. He must have had the same idea as you as he walked past you, only grabbing the nearest shirt off the rack, and making a headway to the desk.
‘What are you going to do now?’ After all, that had been what pulled you two together, the money your father would offer for your return. That is what kept you on this ship safe for as long as it did… although, in retrospect, you doubted that Eddie would have ever done anything to you. Maybe he had always intended to bring you home before even speaking to you. Perhaps the money made no difference. But funnily enough, you wanted him to get it. Something in you, a deep instinct, told you that it was what he deserved.
‘Write a random note,’ he said, and you could see he was doing his best not to laugh. ‘Then we’ll send the note out, hope it reaches your dearest, and we’ll make the exchange.’ His words were quick and emotionless, but you noted the hint of novice apprehension in his plan.
‘You’ve never done this before, have you?’ you asked as you made your way up to the chair across from him.
‘Try not to sound too disappointed over my lack of experience in selling beautiful maidens back to their prosperous fathers.’
‘Not at all,’ you shook your head, grabbing the piece of parchment and quill from him. ‘But let me. It will be proof of life, and besides, your handwriting is unrecognisable. He won’t be able to read any of it.’ 
Eddie stared at you blankly as you began writing. 
Dear father, 
But what were you to write? The ink dripped off the quill as you pondered on the words. For a message that was quite clear, it was hard to actually phrase it and write it out. By the time you had signed your name at the bottom of the page, the Hellfire had almost reached the coast. You read it through once more: 
Dear Father, 
I know it has been a long time since you last heard from me. The Red Tail is no more; I was the only survivor, to my knowledge, saved by a crew of rogue sailors. They have kept me locked away but are willing to free me for the price of 5.000 pounds. Please meet me at noon at the Star Port for the exchange.
Love, 
Your daughter, 
You had decided against the mention of piracy or anything specific about the ship’s sinking, knowing that it would only drive your father away from pain the ransom. Eddie had been unable to keep still while you wrote your drafts but now stood behind you, hands on the backrest of your chair, reading the note along with you, over your shoulder.
‘Who would have thought, my darling extorting her own father.’
‘I am doing no such thing!’ You looked up at him, ‘I am simply… aiding you in extorting my father.’ when it came to this, you had little sympathy for your father. He had plenty of money to spare and often spent it on ridiculous causes. A faux rescue of his only daughter could surely fit in between those other purchases.
There was a knock on the door, which Eddie welcomed, and Harrington walked in. 
‘Got any mail for me to deliver, cap?’ it had been unanimously agreed that Harrington was the most inconspicuous of the whole crew and would be able to walk through the city unbothered to deliver the message. 
You had just been in the middle of folding the parchment. The last thing left was to let the wax melt to keep the corners together. With the seal done, you handed Steve the letter. He smiled at you with thanks, but his face hid an expression of loss, almost. A farewell. But before he left, you clutched him in an embrace, almost knocking Steve over.
When the door closed behind him, it was only a matter of waiting. After your fifth round of pacing through the room, Eddie walked up in front of you, blocking your already quite well-outlined route. He had met you right in the middle. 
‘I would prefer if you did not spend our last moments together walking holes into my carpet.’ 
‘You do not have a carpet,’ you quipped. 
‘Must you be so difficult now?’ He laughed that laugh you cherished so much before he placed his hands on your cheeks and kissed you the way you adored even more. The sun was almost at its peak, and so was your heart, and you had no idea what to do when it would finally fall. Either way, you would find out in a few minutes.
‘Do you think—’ 
‘Highly doubtful,’ Eddie said somberly before you could even finish your thought. ‘You had said it yourself, darling; you are you, I am me. This is not meant to work.’ But what if it could, you wanted to shout, shocking yourself for the millionth time on board this ship.
‘Well, then it had been an honour being your captive, captain.’ You said with a deep breath to keep your composure up.
‘Oh, don’t look so sad just yet, princess, the real fun is only about to begin.’ At this statement, you blinked slowly. ‘Or did you think you were done aiding me?’
‘What else do you need me to do?’ 
‘Since you mentioned it, I think we need to make you look the part of my sweet captive. Make your father believe we really had kept you all good and locked up, hmm?’ He grinned. ‘I really did not do a good job at this, did I? Got you all spoiled up here.’
‘It was much appreciated.’ You giggled, incapable of keeping a straight face when Eddie got like this. Looking back, you could barely imagine the cold and dark exterior that he had once posed in front of you since he had been an entirely different person underneath that. Then again, so were you. ‘So, what did you have in mind?’
‘A lot,’ he licked his lips, ‘but I don’t think we have the time for that. We’ll probably have to do with tying you up like a pretty gift—just your hands, of course,’ he quickly added as he saw your eyes widen. ‘And I’ll be sure to not make it too tight.
‘Alright,’ you nodded. After all, you trusted him. You watched him look through the room for something to wrap around your hands. In the end, he found a piece of rope hanging among the many items on his wall. It was a bit too long for even the intricate, but relatively weak, knot he tied over your wrists—enough to give the impression of captivity, but in reality, barely grazed your wrists. He made sure to check. 
And then it was time. You walked out of the cabin for the final time. The room in which you had spent so many tumultuous days and nights. A silly part of you wanted to actually run down the ladder into the lower deck to see the holding cell one last time. For what reason, you could not fathom. 
Eddie guided you with a hand on your back, down the gangplank, which wobbled with every step you took. You tried to keep your breathing under control, but then again, if this had been a real threat to your life, you would probably feel similarly. The walk down the harbour was the longest of your life. There just came no end to it, and you could not, frustratingly enough, make your mind up if you wanted that or not. After all, each step closer to the port was one step further away from him… and when had you become so dependent on him? Weeks ago, you had thought up visions of killing him in his sleep; now, you could not think of life without him. 
Your thoughts were still fighting for some kind of cohesion when you saw him walk down the street. Accompanied by his usual entourage of guards. Two of them carried a large trunk between them, which must have been filled with gold or other treasures to meet the demand.
‘Papa!’ You screamed out; an incautious urge to run towards him propelled you forward, just to be pulled back by Eddie. You glanced his way, and your breath hitched at what you saw. In the short amount of time that might have felt like an eternity that it took you to walk down the harbour, he had turned into what you could only describe as his old self. The same version of him that you had seen when you were “welcomed’ aboard the Hellfire. The Eddie that terrorised your nightmares. His eyes were pointed like daggers at your father. 
He, in turn, stood aback at the sight of who had been holding you. Most of the men around him did, in fact. It caused a bit of a stir, the murmur of his name travelled in disbelief, but Eddie was the first to speak up in full volume.
‘Governor. I see we meet again.’
‘Munson.’ Your father always had the skill to look unimpressed at the sight of any man, always seeming to be above them, and even now, he did a good job hiding any other emotion, but you could see the crack of fear breaking him on the edges. It was, however, quickly replaced as he spoke in his usual tone of business.
‘Munson. What are you doing here?’
‘Why, returning your precious jewel, of course.’ He grinned, pulling you closer to him. Some of the guards leapt forward but were stopped by your father and Eddie, who reached for the knife at his side. All eyes were on you and him as he let the blade slowly track over your arm. ‘Don’t wanna do that, gents. It will only cost us more trouble.’ 
‘You got the gold, Munson, now let her go!’ There were still several feet between the two sides of the deal. Eddie looked around theatrically. 
‘Do I?’ He cocked his head in his own direction. The two men in charge of the trunk hauled it over to you. You had no idea how Eddie was meant to carry it back to the ship. As they brought the gold over, your father spoke again. 
‘Is she well? Unharmed?’ 
You nodded, but Eddie nudged you with the hilt of his knife, his lips against your ear, ‘C’mon, darling, the man’s asked you a question.’
‘I am fine, father.’ You spoke. By that point, the men reached you and, with a final kiss to your temple, Eddie let you go. You were immediately pulled out of his reach by the guards. They must have thought they were holding you up as your legs objected to moving. You were unable to look away from him. All up until you felt your face pressed against your father’s jacket. 
‘There, there, it is alright,’ he hushed, and it took you a moment to realise why. You were crying. And if only he, or anyone else, understood that it was for all the opposite reasons. No fear or relief was escaping you through those tears. It was a loss as you saw Eddie standing there, bowing down at the end of his performance, blowing you a kiss goodbye.
It was the panic when you saw the rest of the people in the harbour. All of their eyes on you. On him. None of them were simple bystanders or civilians. 
Your dream had been crumbling into ruin all these days, but this was the final blow. All of it came down, all at once, and it started with your father’s call.
‘Guards!’, and suddenly the tenfold of guards appeared out of all possible directions. They had him surrounded, weapons at the ready. Eddie had nowhere to run. Your father spoke clearly, cutting the silence with the blade of his words. ‘Munson, I arrest you on charges of murder and high treason!’ 
Chapter 10
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thank you so much for reading!! if you want more of where this came from, check out my masterlist.
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danikamariewrites · 11 months
Text
The Perfect Day (smut)
Xaden Riorson x f!Reader
A/n: no thoughts just Xaden 🥰 also this is a Dain Aetos account he is truly the worst and I wish that man nothing but awful things. Also I’m so sorry if this is awkward I’m new to smut
My requests r still open!
Warnings: Smut, daddy kink (18+ only please minors dni), light choking
You noticed that Xaden seemed happy today. And he was. Because he was having a really good day. Like the perfect day. Which was rare to have at Basgiath. Between all the constant death and intense training it was hard to find someone in the school that was happy.
You started picking up on his good mood when you met him before breakfast. He was clingier than usual, but you weren’t complaining. Usually between training and classes you didn’t get to see each other much during the day. Today though, you got to see him 3 times.
During your third meeting he told you he had good news, his version of it anyway but who were you to kill his good mood. “I reworked the training schedule with leadership this morning and I made it so Garrick and I were training your squad after dinner.” He was so excited it was adorable. Who got excited about training?
The rest of the day went by without any issues. It was actually a pretty good day for you too. After dinner you headed to the training room. You were sparring with Liam and having far too much fun. You blamed Xaden, his good mood was infectious.
Dain, however, was not one for joking around when it came to sparring. He always had a stick up his ass and was far too serious. It wasn’t a secret that Xaden and Dain didn’t get along. They’re two different people who will never see eye to eye.
Liam was circling you on the mat. He charged at you, you dropped and rolled out his way. Laughing, you dive for Liam’s legs, knocking him flat in his back. You looked at each other and broke out into a fit of laughter. You hear heavy boots approaching you, as the pair of you look up you’re greeted with Dain scowling at you.
“If you two don’t start taking this shit seriously-“ “Or what Aetos?” Xaden’s voice echoed across the room. In a few strides he was standing toe to toe with Dain. You and Liam stood giving the two brooding men space in case they got violent with each other. Liam tried to push you behind him, but you brushed him off. Xaden would never hurt you.
Xaden towered over Dain, smirking he continued, “What Aetos? They can’t let loose once in a while? They’re the best we have, they’re well prepared.” Dain scoffs at him, “As Wingleader you should be making sure they’re fighting the best they can.”
Xaden was now wearing a taunting grin, “No Aetos, as squad leader you should be making sure your squad members are the best they can be. Do I need to report to leadership that you’re not performing your duties as squad leader?”
At that, Dain backed off. Before he could fully step away, Xaden grabbed his arm giving him a death glare. “If you ever take that tone with her again, I promise you, you won’t make it to third year.” Dain’s throat bobbed as he nodded, ripping his arm out of Xaden’s grasp.
Everyone was staring, holding their breath and waiting for a fight that wouldn’t come. Xaden looked around. You were staring at him, eyes gleaming. You loved how he stood up for you, how intimidating he was, especially when the recipient of that intimidation was Dain. You bit your lip and he winked at you.
“I think that’s enough for tonight.” Xaden announced. The squad began to leave and Xaden made his way over to you.
He brushed a loose piece of hair behind your ear, leaving a sensual touch down your neck. A shiver crept down your back. “Hi sweetheart.” Your face broke out into a smile, “Hi baby.” He wrapped his arm around your waist pulling you flush against his front. His other hand comes up to cradle the back of your neck, rubbing the tension that’s there. Excitement rushes through you, heating your cheeks and ears. “What’s got you hot and bothered?” “I think you know,” you purred.
Xaden lets out a breathy laugh, “Yeah but I want you to tell me.” You rolled your eyes, but you couldn’t kill his good mood. So you give him the ego boost, “Your good mood is kinda turning me on. And seeing you put Aetos in his place was really hot.”
“Yeah?” He leans in, nuzzling your nose, “Yeah.” You breathe out.
Xaden kicks his door open, you're in his arms heavily making out. As soon as he shuts the door you wriggle out of his arms, pushing him by the chest to sit on the bed. “What are you up to sweetheart?” The words come out breathy as you palm him through his pants. “Saying thank you.” You give him a mischievous look, dropping to your knees. He spreads his legs to make room for you.
You run your fingers lightly up and down his muscular thighs. Leaning down you place kisses up his clothed legs to his prominent bulge. Xaden moans, throwing his head back. You reach up to undo the ties of his leather pants. Xaden lifts his hips so you can pull his pants and underwear down his legs. He kicks off his boots, you tug his pants off throwing them behind you.
You take his length in your hand. As you pump your hand up and down him you feel yourself getting wet at the thought of him stretching you out. You run your thumb over the head of his cock, spreading his precum around. Xaden’s breathing is shallow, “Fuck, please y/n.” You look up at him, “please what baby?” You say teasingly.
“Please, I need your mouth.” At that you start placing kitten licks on the head of his cock. Moving to lick from the base back up to the head. Xaden growls, gathering your hair he wraps it around his fist.
Before he can yank your head closer to him, you take him in your mouth, sucking and moving your tongue best you can. Xaden lets out a loud moan, you loved it when he was vocal in bed. Bobbing your head you felt his cock twitch in your mouth signaling that he was close. “Ah, so good for me sweetheart. Fuck - you always do such a good job for me.” You moan around his cock as he comes down your throat.
You let go of him with a pop. He pulls you up by your hair grasping your jaw in his other hand. “Let me see.” He growls. Smiling you open your mouth, sticking your tongue out to show him his release. “Fuck sweetheart, you look so perfect like this. Be a good girl and swallow.” You swallow, wiping at your lips.
Standing up, you begin to strip. Throwing your clothes to join Xaden’s on the wooden floor. You climb on to his lap, kissing him and lightly pushing him to lay back. Xaden moves up to lay on the pillows, pulling you with him. He flips you over so you're on your back, never breaking the kiss.
You wrap your legs around Xaden’s waist, pulling him closer to you. “I need you,” you pant, wrapping your arms around his shoulders, clawing at his muscular back. He lets out a sound somewhere between a grunt and a whine as he teases your entrance with his cock. “Shit,” he moans, sliding into your dripping cunt, “fuck you feel so perfect, every fucking time.”
He sets a brutal pace causing your back to arch off the bed into his toned chest. The feeling of him is euphoric. He slid his cock all the way in, letting you feel all of him as he pushed his hips into yours. “Yes daddy,” you gasp out, “I need more please!”
Xaden rests his hand around your throat, his feral gaze locking with yours. “Say that again baby.” You smirk, “I need more daddy, please!” He fucks into you with abandon, the headboard smashing into the wall repeatedly. You feel yourself getting closer to your high, panting as you meet Xaden’s brutal thrusts. “Such a good girl baby, saying please for daddy.” He pants out, “you like being daddy’s good girl, don’t you.” Gods, you loved this new side of him.
Between his cock and his hand resting on your throat squeezing ever so slightly, you were in paradise. Your cunt tightens around him and you feel that coil tighten in your stomach. “Fuck, daddy, I’m going to come.” You scream. “I know princess, I can feel you, fuck. I’m almost there too. You gonna come with daddy.”
You both reach your high, Xaden’s hips slow down as you both come down. You close your eyes as Xaden slips out of you, rolling over onto his back. He caresses your cheek pulling you onto his chest, kissing the top of your head. “Wow…that was fucking amazing.” Xaden lets out a tired laugh. “That was more than amazing sweetheart, that was…there are no words for that.”
You nuzzle into his neck, humming. Your eyelids become heavy as Xaden traces soothing patterns in your back. “Sleep, sweetheart.” He whispers, “I’ll see you in the morning.”
tags: @msiecrane @auggiesolovey (I’m so sorry I haven’t tagged you in the last few fics it completely slipped my mind lol)
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vettelsdarling · 11 months
Text
𝑩𝒆𝒕𝒕𝒆𝒓 𝑻𝒐𝒈𝒆𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒓
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➪This is the second part to “Good Together”
➪Read the first part here!
➪This is the final installment of “Good Together”
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Pairing: Lando Norris x Verstappen!Fem!Reader
Warnings: (18+ content) smut, oral (m receiving), praise k!nk, tiny bit angst, really smutty
Word count: 6.3k+
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“It’s rude to stare, you know?” Busted. Lando didn’t bother opening his eyes before he felt shuffling in the bed. You hogged the sheets as you went to grab some clothes from your closet. Lando swiftly covered himself with a pillow.
“I have to go talk to Kelly. Can you please leave?” You asked, throwing a bra and panties on the bed as you continued your search for something to wear.
“Hold on, okay? Just wait.” He decided to discard the pillow and got out of bed.
“What?” You turned around and tried your best not to look down. You saw something in his eyes. He was searching for answers. Answers you regretted giving the night before. Answers that you didn’t want to repeat.
“Why are you being like this?” He grabbed your arm, caressing it.
“Like what?” You shot back. All you wanted was for him to get out. After that, you definitely needed a margarita with Kelly.
“Why are you so hasty? So distant?” Lando left you no other choice, but to play dumb.
“What do you mean by that? I’m not distant. I’m right here.” Lando sighed and shook his head. He could clearly tell what you were doing, but he decided not to pry any further. Instead, he decided to give you the same treatment.
“Well, since we had a great time last night, I’d like to take you out tonight.” Bold. Very bold, you thought. You played him right back.
“No, actually. I have plans with someone else.” It was a quick lie that you’d be able to cover up by calling your brother. Maybe even another driver. Lando tried his best to keep it together but failed miserably. The image of you wrapped up in someone else’s arms disgusted him. Even if that someone was Carlos. Sure, they were friends, but he had no regrets about anything.
“Stop being immature and tell me what you want,” he said as he glared at you. Your eyes met his again. They showed a hint of desperation this time.
“What I want? What I really want?” There was a slight tug on your lip, restoring the tiniest bit of hope in Lando.
“Tell me, baby,” he smiled.
“Well… I really want…—“ You hesitated before continuing,
“I really want you to put some clothes on and get the hell out of my apartment.” His smile instantly dropped. You didn’t care. You returned to your closet, trying to find whatever would fit for day drinking.
“You know what? Fuck you,” he spat, as he got dressed,
“You go tell Carlos that we’re not a thing. Maybe you can beg him to take you back. I certainly won’t be in the way anymore.” He finished getting dressed before you, took his jacket, and slammed your front door behind him.
Once again, you were alone. Left to sit and soak in what you’d done to Carlos. At that point in time, with the shock of what had happened the night before, you didn’t care about hurting Lando. Sure, maybe he didn’t deserve it— but that was a problem the future version of you would have to deal with.
You got dressed and grabbed your phone from your bedside table. 5 missed calls and 12 new messages all from Carlos. Your heart sank. Whilst you’d been busy doing his best friend, he had tried to call to talk things out completely. You ignored it for the time being, and sent Kelly a quick text,
‘Hey, Kelly… up for some day drinking?’ Lucky for you, she saw the text and replied almost instantly,
‘Of course, I’ll tell Max I have some business to attend’. You went around your place, trying to find everything. After you did, you locked your front door behind you and went outside. You didn’t own a car, as the expenses of law school never really allowed you to. Instead, you decided to take the bus. That was the beauty of not being in the media all that much. Not a single soul recognized you on the bus. You were able to get to your brother’s house with no trouble at all.
When you arrived, you waited for Kelly to come out. However, when you noticed a fiat jolly parked out front. It was hard to believe your eyes, but they didn’t deceive you. Without much thought, you decided to go straight inside. You memorized the passcode to the flat, as you came regularly.
Going in, you tiptoed past the living room, found a place to remain somewhat hidden, and observed your brother and Lando. They weren’t playing video games like they usually were. No, they were conversing. You saw Lando sigh into his hands. They were most definitely talking about you. Still keeping yourself hidden, you moved closer so that they were in earshot.
“Maybe you were reading her wrong this morning?” Asked your brother to try and calm the Brit down.
“I don’t think so. Besides, how would I apologize for saying that stuff to her?” You didn’t really know what to think. On one side, Lando had told you that he loved you. On the other side, he had yet to show you. How were you supposed to trust him after he betrayed you?
“Oh, you’re here! Let’s go!” A voice behind you bubbled. You turned around to see Kelly standing there with Penelope hugging her leg. The little toddler went on to hug yours instead whilst smiling fondly at you.
“You almost gave me away, Kelly!” You whisper-yelled. She didn’t say anything and looked behind you as if there was someone there.
“Gave you away? Were you trying to avoid us?” Max asked. When you turned around yet again, you saw your brother standing there with Lando at his side. You were filled with embarrassment. The kind of embarrassment you hadn’t felt in a long time.
“Not at all. I’m just here for Kelly.” You only dared to look into the eyes of Max. There was no way you could bear to even catch a glimpse of Lando’s face staring back at yours.
“Oh okay, where are you going?” It almost felt like an interrogation, which Kelly luckily saved you from,
“Stop grilling your sister, would you? We’re just going out to shop and eat.” She pulled you with her to the front door, leaving Penelope with Max and Lando.
“Please make sure ‘P’ eats something light for lunch, I’m making dinner tonight!” Kelly yelled before closing the door behind her. The two of you got into Kelly’s car and she started the engine. After driving away from the house, you felt more at ease. Just being in the vicinity of the curly-haired Brit made your head pound.
You still hadn’t called Carlos back. You didn’t know if you could. Especially after sleeping with his best friend on the same day as your breakup. Your stomach was knotted with guilt. You could hardly think of getting anything down. How Carlos would ever think of forgiving you, you couldn’t imagine. The Spaniard had always been there for you. He’d always shown you how much he loved you. Although he hadn’t told you directly, you knew that he only had eyes for you. Everything he did, he did for you. Here you were, the second your past crush waltzed back into your life, you pounced. Had you ever been in love with Carlos? Did you ever actually feel anything for him? Was he just a temporary replacement for Lando?
You didn’t know whether to indulge in your own delusion, whether the delusion wasn’t a delusion, or whether to blame yourself. It’s hard for anyone to own up to their mistakes, but something like this was hard to own up to. Mostly because your mind was too clouded with guilt to see if you actually were in the wrong.
Carlos swooping in at the soonest opportunity didn’t seem too far-fetched though. His timing had been awfully convenient. The two of you started talking soon after Lando stopped talking to you. It could only mean one thing; Lando had confided in him and he used that information to get closer to you— eventually going as far as getting infatuated with you.
Was it a mere delusion, or was there maybe some truth to it? In any case, you were more than ready to drown it all out with booze. You didn’t have to wait long, as Kelly parked the car in front of a bar. You unfastened your seatbelt and quickly made it inside.
“Okay. I have one rule. Get as drunk as you want, just don’t get me too drunk,” she said with a chuckle. You went up to the bar and took a seat.
“We’ll start a tab. A Long Island iced tea for me, please.” Kelly gave you a shocked look before ordering her drink.
“Are you kidding? How bad is it?”
“I just don’t want to think about it anymore. I don’t want to think about him anymore,” you sighed and rested your head on the table in front of you. Kelly rubbed the bridge of her nose.
“Look, I saw you when things were good between you and Lando. Do you know what I saw in that? Raw and real chemistry,” she encouraged. You were unsure if you enjoyed her feeding you more delusions, but it felt comforting. Kelly usually had a comforting energy around you.
“I don’t know, Kelly. Why would he suddenly just not talk to me if we had that much chemistry?” The bartender slid you your drink and Kelly’s. You immediately took a sip of yours. The straw in the tea only elevated the experience of drinking it. For multiple reasons. Not only were you drinking with a straw, but you were also drinking on an empty stomach. Only time could tell how wasted you were going to end up before the bartender would have no choice but to cut you off.
“Didn’t he already tell you why? Come on, it’s right in front of you, honey,” said Kelly with a roll of her eyes.
The dilemma was that you couldn’t tell if you were feeding yourself hopeless delusions or if something suspicious actually happened. Carlos was such a sweet and gentle soul, but with so many things going on all at once; it was hard to rule out the possibility that he’d taken you from Lando.
“Hello? Stop spiralling, okay? I’m sure Lando feels awful for what he did to you… maybe forgiving him is a great first step, you know?” Kelly’s maternal instinct is exactly what made you like her that much more. She was right. You knew she was, but again, you hated admitting it. Perhaps you weren’t being fair to Lando. Not only had you actually admitted to still being in love with him, but you’d also acted on it. On the exact same day, you’d broken up with Carlos.
As time passed, you only got more and more drunk. The bartender decided to cut you off, and Kelly was in no position to drive either. You were far too gone to carry out another conversation with her, and she had fallen asleep on the counter. You then made the decision to call Max to come to get you in his car and to bring someone else so that Kelly could get her car driven home as well. The way you slurred your words and barely formed a coherent sentence worried him. You immediately blacked out after hanging up, thereby joining Kelly on the counter. It was only a distant hope that you wouldn’t have some drunken fever dream epiphany by the time you’d wake up.
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By the time you woke up, you were in your bed at your brother’s place. Your head felt like somebody had rammed it into a wall. Your nausea wasn’t any better. It didn’t help much that it was pitch black, besides the moonlight shining in from behind your curtains. You could see the slight lighting on the window ledge. It was enough for you to see where you were going. You’d pulled yourself out of bed and headed into the kitchen to get something to drink. An educated guess informed you that it was past midnight, so you had to be careful not to be too loud.
“You’re not sneaky, you know?” You nearly dropped your glass of water when you heard the voice creeping up from behind you. It was clearly Max. He had that tired voice you remember from having to wake him up in the mornings to take you to campus.
“Max? You startled me…” your eyes squinted when he turned on some of the lights in the kitchen. It wasn’t too bright, but your eyes had just adjusted to the dark.
“Yeah, I couldn’t sleep.” You somehow felt like that was your fault. Going out and drinking yourself shitfaced. It wasn’t exactly the best idea. Your brother cared for you to no end, so you could understand his concerns.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to worry you…” Your headache was a bit too overpowering to actually deal with anything at the moment though.
“You know, I really think Lando is in love with you. I don’t just think he likes you, I really do think he’s in love,” said your brother and grabbed a fresh apple from the fruit bowl on the kitchen island.
“I don’t know… he really hurt me, Max. What do I even say or do with him?” You sighed and gulped the last bit of your water down. Your throat was so dry, you could feel every last drop of water trickle down your throat. Max put his apple aside to pull you in for a tight hug. You could barely breathe, but you wrapped your arms around his back as well.
“I love you, okay? I just want what’s best for you. That’s why I’m telling you to hold onto Lando. It’s not just because he’s my best friend. I just never saw that spark between you and Carlos. You and Lando? I saw it all the time. I saw the way you looked at him and the way he looked at you,” he said as he pulled away from the hug. It was hard for you not to cry. You were still a bit drunk after all.
“I love you too… I’ll talk to Lando in the morning. Is he here?” Your brother nodded without saying anything in response. Shit. The thought of committing to Lando was frightening, but you trusted Max and his judgment.
“Is he… awake?”
“I’m not sure. He’s sleeping on the couch. I have to get back to bed, but try your luck.” He left the kitchen and you heard the door to his bedroom close.
Your heart was beating so fast, it felt like it was caught in your throat. You were in no condition to confront Lando, but you felt like doing it anyway. With heavy steps and a pounding head, you made your way to the living room. Max was right. There he was. Lando slept soundly on the couch. You noticed he didn’t have a blanket to sleep with, so you grabbed one from your blanket basket beside the TV. When you draped it over him, you saw his face ease into the warm feeling. It felt awfully domestic looking at him sleep, but it also felt like you were violating his personal space.
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You couldn’t bring yourself to wake him up and eventually fell asleep on the floor by his side. When Lando’s eyes fluttered open to the morning sun, he noticed the blanket that was so delicately placed on top of him. Then, he noticed you. He noticed your hair, your smell, your lips… he was mesmerized by the sight of you sleeping, slumped against the couch.
“I think she’s trying.” Lando heard Max come into the living room.
“Yeah?”
“Yeah… I talked to her earlier. She’s hurt by what you did. I think she’s confused too. She doesn’t really know how to talk to you. Maybe you should try?” Max said and left abruptly after. He was already in a fresh set of clothes, so Lando assumed he had a meeting.
“Kelly left breakfast for the two of you, by the way. I’ll be off. See you.”
Silence. It was completely silent in the house. It was just you and Lando alone. Together. The realization nearly made Lando’s breathing come to a screeching halt.
“Hey… wake up.” He stroked your hair and gently shook your shoulders. Lucky for him, you were an extremely light sleeper. When he saw your tired eyes open to the sight of him, he swore he could’ve died and gone to heaven. He’d seen the only blessing he’d ever need in his life. The way your eyes fixated on his… he could barely take it.
“I was hoping we could… talk?” Lando helped you up on the couch. There was an awkward air between the two of you. It was hard to communicate, and you’d always known that communication was key.
“Sure, I guess.” It was an appropriate response, considering the awkwardness of the situation. You didn’t owe him much anyway… Did you? You curled up with the blanket. Lando let you have it, as he didn’t need it anymore. Both of you were waiting for the other to start. Lando was the one to cave in, however.
“Max came in just a few minutes ago. I know now that I should’ve been more patient with you. Having broken your trust, I shouldn’t have been so selfish about it. I should’ve waited for you to be ready.
“I appreciate you admitting that. I really do, Lando…” You looked down at your fingers sheepishly. Looking directly at the Brit whilst saying that felt too raw.
“—But?” Asked Lando. He knew there’d be a ‘but’ after that. He wasn’t wrong. There was.
“—but I don’t know whether or not to give you a chance. I just don’t know how to go about it,” you sighed into the blanket that comforted you.
“Can I hug you?” The tone of the question almost sounded like he was begging for your touch. You didn’t mind though. You pulled his head into your chest, letting him hear the beat of your heart. Fast but gentle. You stroked his curls, which he loved. It was like a drug to him. Your touch was intoxicating. Especially when it was so domestic and calming. Lando snuggled deeper into you and pulled the blanket over the both of you. At that point, you were leaning against the arm of the couch.
“I missed you,” he mumbled. You could hear the sincerity in his words, but you didn’t want to give in to trust too easily.
“I’ve always been right here.” Something about those words tugged harshly at the McLaren driver’s heartstrings. He felt that dip of guilt he always felt whenever you brought up Luisa. He knew it wasn’t a guilt trip. You were hurt for obvious reasons and you had every right to keep yourself reserved.
“I’m sorry, bunny.” Bunny. A nickname you hadn’t heard in a while. He used to call you that to annoy you, but you found it oddly comforting now.
“I know, Lan,” you sighed and leaned your head back to stare up at the ceiling,
“I just wish you would have come to me about everything earlier. I wouldn’t have hurt Carlos and you and I…” you trailed off. Was it really that hard to finish the sentence? It was as if something was preventing you from doing so. Some spiritual power.
Instead of saying something— anything, Lando pulled away from you and instead caged you under his body. Your eyes met his, as he dipped down to get closer to your face. Your lips parted. He took note of that, as he attacked them with his own. Those pretty little lips of yours were his to swell up. That pretty hair of yours was his to pull. That radiant skin of yours was his to bruise.
Just like before, there was no liquid courage involved. It was pure lust and boldness coming from the both of you. Lando pulled his shirt off. He put the statue of David to shame with his body that looked as if it was carved out of marble. God and the way he looked at you with adoration. You couldn’t help but succumb. Likely not in the way that he wanted, though.
You decided that you wanted to take control. If anything, gratitude is what he felt. The two of you flipped, with you on top of him. Your hips were against his, but you decided not to start grinding yet. You wanted him to be patient, as he hadn’t been before. You wanted to teach him a lesson once and for all. Your lips came down on his, biting his under lip— which he enjoyed a tad bit too much. You could tell by the twitching in his pants. He was definitely feeling restrained and you relished in making him feel that way. He deserved it.
Taking things to the next step, you took your tank top off painfully slow. The moment your bra was in sight, Lando sat up. You were quick to reject his advances and push him down again,
“Ah ah, you don’t get to touch. Patience.” The way he listened to you like an obedient little dog made you feel so powerful. You were in a position you’d always dreamed of being in.
You’d never slept with Carlos, but you had the feeling that he wouldn’t let you do something like that. Lando? He was more than happy to give up control, and you loved it.
Your hand slid down his chest, making him shiver with delight. The closer you came to his lower region, the harder he seemed to breathe. You could feel his excitement against your pelvic floor. Upon adjusting your position to completely match, Lando took it as if you were starting to please him. To give in to his needs. After all, whatever he desired was exactly what you desired.
It was too hard for you to keep the act up. You were just as hot and heavy as he was. Waiting for it was painful. Even for you, who hadn’t gotten action in months before you got it from the Brit. Your chastity was only what turned the both of you on even more. The way you’d only ever been used by few did it for him.
You leaned down to kiss him, thereby letting him unclasp your bra. He flung it into a corner, nearly hitting the flatscreen. Your brother would’ve ended your life, if sex would’ve knocked over his precious TV.
It was easy to tell that the curly-haired driver had gained more than a little too much confidence, as he asked you to take him down your throat. It wasn’t that you didn’t want to. You were more than happy to, but it’d be too easy. Although your patience was running out, you wanted his to be as depleted as possible. You wanted to see the desperate look in his eyes as he would beg you. The thought of it was enough to convince you to hold onto your own patience.
What was the purpose of drugs when you had sex? You were high on the feeling, and drunk on Lando’s expressions. He loved the way you looked on top of him. The way you were so confident and almost vicious.
“I want you so bad.” There it was. The first step towards a constantly begging Lando. What you’d done at your place was nothing compared to this. It wasn’t just a quickie either. The two of you both held the utmost respect for the other, wanting nothing but pleasure.
“You’ll get it if you’re patient, Lan,” you said with a small tug on your lips. He hated waiting. Patience might’ve been a virtue, but it sure as hell wasn’t his strong suit. Even with Luisa. He rushed into things with her, without realizing that he was in love with someone else. The two of you both had more than enough time, but all he ever did was rush. Lessons are taught for a reason. To make it his forté, you taught him using sex.
You kicked the blanket off and got off him, so that you could move further down his body, stationing your face between his thighs. Oh, how he wanted it. Just to watch him breathe out with an even shakier breath, you tugged at his boxer briefs with your teeth. You made sure to take a lick of his skin in between the tugging. His gasps were egging your heat on. It had risen to your head. Your mind was swimming in it even though the air conditioning had been turned on.
When you finally got them off with the help of your hands, his dick stood proudly in front of you. With beaming eyes, you admired that one, particularly prominent vein. Lando was obviously over the bend after waiting so long for you to do something— anything. Truly, anything. He craved your tongue, the walls of your mouth, and the back of your throat.
You gave him exactly what he wanted. Your tongue swirled around his tip. It was already leaking precum. The taste was salty, but like last time— you welcomed it with an enthusiastic smile. After having teased him enough with your tongue, you went down on him. His hands easily found your hair, pulling it into a messy makeshift ponytail. You learned from your lesson last time. Gag reflex? What even was that? The closer your nose got to his abdomen, the more you heard the sighs and seethes of the driver. He guided you up and down his dick, watching as tears pricked the corners of your eyes. Maybe you still had to practice some more. You had just the right way to do it in front of you. Practice makes perfect.
As the pace sped up, you relinquished control and let him use your mouth to unload himself. He deserved it after you kept him waiting for so long. Closer and closer, he was almost at the end of his rope, trying desperately to catch the tide below. With one final push of your head, he released himself down your throat. You eagerly swallowed everything like the good girl you were.
“You took me just perfect, bunny.” That nickname really did something for you. A tingle in your abdomen forced you to act on your desires. Your heart was beating fast and you weren’t really sure if you even had a thought going through your mind. You were drunk on his cologne, his shampoo, his body wash— everything. You wanted him bad.
“Ride me,” said Lando with hooded eyes, looking down at you. You didn’t know what to say. It’d certainly be a first. Whatever confidence you had before was gone. Lando’s pure sex appeal and desperate need for you had thrown it all out the window. Patience was no longer a virtue. Patience was a social construct. One that you wanted more than anything; to defy with no remorse.
You were swiftly able to kick off your shorts along with your panties, having them join your bra. Lando adjusted himself to sit upright to make your experience better. Instead of letting him enter, you decided to lubricate his dick with your slick. You started grinding against him, coating every inch of him with you. Not only did it make him hard again, but it also ensured his continued lust for you. Fuck, did you love the way we grabbed your hips, squeezing them the way he did. He was simply intoxicating.
It wasn’t long before you’d had enough and needed him. He helped by aligning himself. You slowly sank down on him, barely being able to take all of him. He didn’t rush you. He gave you the time you needed to adjust to his size. The stretch was unfathomable. Not something the average woman would expect in her lifetime.
“You’re doing so good, darling,” the Brit responded to your continued whimpering and heavy breathing. You were an absolute sucker for praise. You used his shoulders as a crutch, which he was more than happy about. That way, he was able to see the dip of your breasts and the way they’d come to bounce back and forth as you rode him.
When you began moving, you immediately felt his fingers dig into your hips. He was evidently trying not to hurt you too much, but the way he seethed and looked at you with those gorgeous blue-grey eyes— he wasn’t great at hiding it.
You closed your eyes and threw your head back as you began to go faster. Your moans bounced off the walls and his groans ricocheted with them. You saw stars. You felt fuller than after a whole Thanksgiving meal. He was big, and judging by his smirk in between his sighing and groaning— he knew exactly just how big he was. Lando was more than proud of the fact that he could please in ways nobody ever would.
“Lando- fuck,” you could barely form a coherent sentence. Your mind was too hazy and drunk on his dick. There was no such thing as multitasking. There was only riding and moaning.
“Fuck, baby, say my name again,” he responded. He could tell you were starting to get tired, by the way your legs started giving out. Respecting your wishes of wanting to stay on top, he kept you there. Only, he started thrusting into you with all the force he could muster.
“Lando,” you repeated. You sang his name like a Christmas carol. You sounded divine. He loved hearing his name spill uncontrollably from your swollen, little lips.
The two of you were both getting close. It was a stroke of luck that you’d started birth control when you met Carlos. You’d almost cancelled your prescription, due to Carlos never seeming interested in that sort of thing. You were more than happy with your decision to keep taking it.
Lando went faster, trying to get you to go before him. You were his number one priority. He needed you to finish before him. He wanted to spoil you. Your hips were red with marks he left from all the squeezing.
Your vision was blurry and you saw a faint light in the corner of your eye. It was likely the sun peering in from the windows, but paired with the blurring; it felt like you were in another plane of existence. Your walls started tightening. You felt it like an electric shock zooming through every nerve ending in your entire body. You bit your lower lip to avoid screaming out the curly-haired Brit’s name, but he was not having it. He wanted to hear you. Hell, he wanted all of Monaco to hear you. Loud and clear.
“Don’t you dare stay silent. Scream. Scream for me, bunny.” You weren’t a brat. You did exactly as you were told. To the point. You screamed his name, as your walls constricted Lando’s movements. Your sweet essence ran down his dick. Just the sight of it paired with the inability to move inside you pushed him over the edge as well. With a deep groan and a feeble attempt at a thrust, he painted your walls white with his cum. You were his canvas and painting was his hobby.
“That’s how it’s supposed to feel,” you sighed and let yourself fall against him.
“I know, bunny, I know”.
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The rest of that week was filled with Lando. He drove you to campus, he drove you home, he drove you to go see friends, he brought you to his races, and he had you wear his McLaren fits.
Carlos came to understand the situation, as he’d not been in the right mindset from the get-go either. It was still awkward around him, but his friendship with Lando still went strong… despite the betrayal on both sides. He had admitted to going for the opportunity, knowing Lando was into you. The two of them were fairly quick to forgive and forget. You couldn’t quite make sense of how they did so.
Even though Lando pampered you to no end, you were still stuck. You still couldn’t tell whether or not to trust him. Kelly told you to let it go. Max told you to let it go. All of your friends told you to forgive Lando. You still had yet to do so. The trust issues had cut so deep, it had disconnected you from any sort of common sense whatsoever. It wasn’t that you didn’t want to trust him. You just couldn’t bring yourself to do it. You didn’t have it in your heart.
So, one day, whilst lying in your shared hotel suite, you contemplated sitting down with Lando to talk. He’d just finished qualifying, so it was the perfect opportunity.
When Lando walked through the door, you saw a look of elation etched onto his face. It likely meant he did well, which, of course, made you just as excited. You got out of bed to go congratulate him on his position.
“I’m guessing you did well?” You popped up in front of him. Oh, how he loved seeing you in your tiny shorts and his hoodie. Your hair was messy from shifting in the bed, but he didn’t seem to mind. It added to your rawness and your natural beauty. This was exactly what he wanted to come back home to every single day.
“P3, bunny.” His smile lit the entire suite up. He was really that amazing.
“Congrats, Lan,” you smiled into a kiss and buried your face in the crook of his neck when hugging him. He stroked your hair and hummed. His love language was physical touch, and he loved it whenever you’d indulge in it.
He saw a pile of files, documents, and photos lying on the desk of the table. It was a case you were studying for your upcoming exam. The thought of having you take your material with you for him pained him, but seeing as you didn’t mind; he didn’t say anything about it.
“Actually, could we talk for a second?” For whatever reason, Lando’s heart immediately dropped to his stomach. He knew of those words all too well.
“Of course, Bunny. You can talk to me. What’s wrong?” The two of you took a seat on the bed. It sank with your combined weight.
“I’ve actually been wondering… well… I don’t actually know how to go about saying this,” you started. The tone of your voice didn’t give him any hint as to what was to come, but he had a slight idea of what it was about.
“You can tell me anything,” he urged.
“I just have this nagging feeling that you’ll leave me again. I just… I want to know that I can trust you.” Although it was exactly what he’d expected, it still shook him to hear it out loud. The fact that you looked like you really needed him to tell you outright, saddened him. He didn’t blame you, of course. He just couldn’t help but feel hurt.
“I would never do that to you again,” he tried to reason, but you cut in,
“You did it once before. I’m scared you’ll do it again, Lando” You rarely used his name. You always resorted to nicknames and shortening it.
“Believe me, Bunny. Look at me. Look into my eyes,” he pleaded. You did as he asked and stared into his desperate eyes. He clearly wanted to do right, but you were blind. You had to hear it. You needed to hear him say it right.
“I love you. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. I’ll say it a thousand times if that’s what it takes for you to believe me.” He took your hands in his and gave them a light squeeze.
“I can’t even imagine a life without you if I’m being completely honest. The way you came to greet me at the door. I mean, why would I ever leave you? I’m so lucky to have you waiting for me after every race. So lucky to be able to wake up with you next to me. I was just a fool to realize it so late, Bunny.” He hoped it was enough. He hoped it had gotten through to you.
“I love you too, Lan. I love you so much.” You leaned into a gentle kiss, carefully intertwining your fingers with his soft curls. You felt his hands cup the sides of your face, caressing the back of your ears with his index finger.
“You and Carlos weren’t, but we are,” whispered Lando after pulling away from the kiss, forehead pressed against yours. You looked into his mesmerizing, blue eyes. The same ones you fell in love with before everything went down. The same ones you’d always loved.
“What?” You asked and chuckled, unsure what he meant by that. He smiled at you. You smiled at him.
“Good together.”
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𝗥𝗲𝗾𝘂𝗲𝘀𝘁𝘀 𝗮𝗿𝗲 𝗼𝗽𝗲𝗻...
𝘾𝙝𝙚𝙘𝙠 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙧𝙪𝙡𝙚𝙨 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙧𝙚𝙜𝙪𝙡𝙖𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣𝙨 𝙗𝙚𝙛𝙤𝙧𝙚 𝙧𝙚𝙦𝙪𝙚𝙨𝙩𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙥𝙡𝙚𝙖𝙨𝙚!
𝙃𝙚𝙧𝙚’𝙨 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙢𝙖𝙨𝙩𝙚𝙧𝙡𝙞𝙨𝙩
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©vettelsdarling
𝗣𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝗱𝗼 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝗿𝗲𝗰𝗿𝗲𝗮𝘁𝗲 𝗼𝗿 𝗮𝗱𝗮𝗽𝘁 𝗺𝘆 𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗸 𝗶𝗻 𝗮𝗻𝘆 𝘄𝗮𝘆, 𝘀𝗵𝗮𝗽𝗲, 𝗼𝗿 𝗳𝗼𝗿𝗺— 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝗺𝘆 𝗽𝗲𝗿𝗺𝗶𝘀𝘀𝗶𝗼𝗻.
638 notes · View notes