#I’m glad I’m able and willing to give myself this rest. and proud

[moontxt]

I feel so guilty for not being productive but it’s not bc I think I have to be productive every day, it’s just bc I worry that I will never feel productive again. like one or two days in bed means I’ll never want to get out of bed again. but that isn’t true! it just isn’t true!!!

#I am a functioning person I have desire and will to do things I am just tired or maybe sick #I’ve spent days in bed before and I’ve managed to get on #also I haven’t been just in bed! I’ve been doing school work and I took a walk in the park both days #so I’m not depressed and it won’t last forever my body just needs rest right now and that’s okay #I’m glad I’m able and willing to give myself this rest. and proud #t

[daisynik7]

DARLING WIFE!!!!!!!!!<3 HI HOW ARE YOU, i’m doing good just woke up from a toasty slumber in your pretty brain, that roomba is working overtime (yes, that was deliberate. no, i can’t stop thinking about him (O_o) anyways HI SWEET ANGEL I MISSED YOU again 🫶🏼

been busy cleaning house and doing laundry to welcome New Year’s, relishing in freshly washed sheets, + loungewear, and being freshly showered i need an trophy for not immediately falling asleep the second my skin touched the warm blankets 🫠 

christmas was well too! nothing to extravagant (i’m still over the t-day turkey lmao) just been cooking korean dishes and banchan (side dishes) with the family to clean out the fridge, and because i can’t live without rice 🥲 how about you? any special dishes or sweets you’re willing to share? 

your lovely words through the internet mean more to me than you may realize and i wholeheartedly appreciate the time you’ve taken out to check in on me, i’m drowning in that warm fuzzy feeling and it appears you’re the source, whatever have i done to find such a sweetheart like you🥹 

you’ve done incredible in 2023, and i’m so excited to see what you do in 2024 and honoured to have you backing me!!! as always, continue to treat yourself with kindness and patience, acknowledge the things in your life that is diverting attention from your health and well-being, and remove it or postpone progress until you’re able. 🫶🏼

and i 100% agree with the resolutions thing! the world doesn’t stop, but we can and of course, that isn’t a negative thing. even for a moment to stop and admire our success on all scales, it’s so necessary and i’m glad that is something you’re starting to do for yourself, that is something i should be allowing myself:) a very cozy, snuggly, and healthy brain you have 😌

this is a little shorter than i’m wanting, i’m worried my tears are going to short-circuit my keyboard, YOU’RE TOO CUTE STOP IT 😭😭😭 no don’t. you’re a source of safety and comfort, an absolute angel and i’m so happy to be here with you to lean on, cheer each other on, and supply a little extra support when the other needs<3 

end the last day of the year with a bang even if it’s something simple and intimate, it all counts! i’m just as blessed to have met you, it’s not something i think about often but i guess i really am favoured for this to happen 🥹 

i love you so so dearly my pretty daisy, thank you for being you i hope today is a good day for you! 🤍 Happy New Year's Eve!

SNOOKUMS! 😭 I'm doing fine, I'm so happy to hear from you and I'm glad you were able to take such a peaceful slumber in my brain! I miss you too, sweetie pie but I hope you're taking all the rest you need to start 2024 right!

you've been so busy! so proud of you for being productive even at the end of 2023. I turned my brain off about two weeks ago LOL. I am handing you the biggest, shiniest trophy (hand-crafted) because you are a STAR. ✨

never mentioning that bird again, don't worry. ;) and all of that sounds delicious (especially with rice)! sounds like you're well stocked for the start of the year! wish you could send some my way, but I will eat it with you in spirit hehe. we had the standard assortment of both filipino dishes (courtesy of my auntie), and americanized dishes (I made spinach did lol) and it was all very tasty!

thank you again for your wisdom, the most important reminder you give me is to be kind to myself, because I don't do that nearly enough as I should. All of us need to be kinder to ourselves!

did you do anything special to ring in the new year? I didn't do anything myself (stayed in, which is what I prefer), but we watched a local countdown on the tv.

ahhhh you are way too sweet to me, thank you as always for your heartfelt messages, love, and support. I never take your kindness for granted and appreciate you more than I can express in words. I hope you have a prosperous and peaceful 2024. I love you thea! ♥️

#my lovely thea #lovely moots #wifey's love letters

[shingia]

hopefullyy this inspires u to write,,, can i request hc's of the boys getting jealous seeing their s/o work well with another person on a team/club? like good chemistry with a dance partner for example! (u can choose who u write but can it include iwa!!) <33

✗ HQ BOYS GETTING JEALOUS SEEING YOU WORK WELL WITH ANOTHER PERSON ✗

a/n : kdjfkdjdkdj i love this request omg ty ! i did half hc/half scenarios bc i thought the request fitted this format <3

-> iwaizumi, osamu, kuroo, suna, tsukishima

-> warnings : kuroo’s a bit suggestive (tbh i don’t know about the rest. it’s just... kinda hot? (tsukki’s only fluff tho<3))

-> reblogs are >>>>

— IWAIZUMI

• iwa’s jealousy was practically non existent until he actually saw you interact with your partner

• don’t get me wrong, he absolutely loves your smile - but he especially loves to be the one who caused it

• he tends to get physically very protective of you, so expect his arm to stay wrapped around your shoulders most of the time. because to him it’s the easiest way to show the world (but especially your partner) that you’re his

• he also not-so-subtly offers you to wear his clothes on days when you have practice. and he secretly hopes that someone will ask you who they belong to...

« it’s cold outside. you should wear this ». iwa’s low and unannounced voice makes you turn around in surprise. leaned against the bathroom’s doorframe, he’s holding your favorite jacket in his hand - the one with his name written on the back, and you suspect that this might not be a coincidence... with a chuckle, you agree to put it on, noticing the proud spark in his eyes. « you know, i’m pretty sure everyone already knows i’m dating you » you tease him with a wink, all while also admiring the way his name takes up the whole width of your back. « oh yeah ? » he asks, a smirk tugging at his lips as he leans forward to rest his hands on the sink behind you. trapped between his outstretched arms, you watch his smirk grow just a little bit bigger as he lets out, very quietly, « well this is just a reminder... it better be the last ». his green eyes locked with yours could almost make you forget about his arm snaking around your waist at a painfully slow pace. almost.

— OSAMU

• look, he’s very happy for you. no doubt about it. but he’s so used to see people fawn over his brother that he can’t help but get a little protective from time to time

• since gifts are his #1 love language, he might buy you a workout-friendly piece of jewelry that you can wear during your practice

• he also insists on dropping you off and picking you up as often as his busy schedule allows it. especially since he learned that your partner was willing to give you a ride home...

• it’s not that he doesn’t trust you, obviously. he just doesn’t trust them yet

• and that’s why his kisses - and pda in general - are a bit more « intense » than usual

leg bouncing up and down, osamu is (very) anxiously for your conversation with your teammate to end. because after watching the entirety of your practice, he needs a little reminder that you two also have incredible chemistry together... a better one, even. so as soon as he sees you wave your teammate goodbye, he stands up straight, arms open just wide enough to welcome you against his chest. but instead of the chaste kiss you expected to get, you’re actually greeted by his left hand grabbing your sides while his right meets your lower back. disconcerted, you don’t even have time to say a word that his mouth crashes onto yours so eagerly that you have to lean back a few inches. « wh-what was that for ? » you pant as soon as his warm lips have left yours. « nothing. i love ya, that’s all » he smiles innocently, glad that you didn’t notice the cocky look he just gave your teammate who witnessed everything from afar... exactly as planned.

— KUROO

• passive agressive™️

• he would insist on properly meeting your partner but oh god they better brace themselves,,,

• because kuroo’s the kind of boyfriend that will shake their hand hard enough to make them yelp, all while having an angelic smile plastered on his face

• oh and you can forget being called by your name : he’s going to demonstrate the entire variety of nicknames he has for you. he might even come up with new ones just because he’s feeling « inspired »

• every single thing he says to your partner has to be a reminder that you two are dating. like « oh yeah they told me about this yesterday.. during our date ». just to make sure that there’s no misunderstanding.

« well... speak of the devil », kuroo hears you chuckle, your voice almost drowned out by his heavy breathing. he’s obviously planing on apologizing for being late... but not now. there’s something he wants to do first. still very aware of your partner’s presence right in front of you, he decides to securely yet eagerly wrap his arms around your waist before spinning you around proudly. « so... you guys were talking about me ? » he asks, glad to know that he’s the reason behind your giggles. « we were, actually » you answer a bit more seriously as he finally puts you down, still keeping both his hands on your waist. « well, i am your boyfriend after all... » he starts, interrupting himself to place a loud peck on your jawline. the only thing you can think is about is how awful this situation must be for your partner... kuroo, on the other hand, doesn’t seem bothered at all, as shown by the way one of his hands discreetly makes its way under the fabric of your t-shirt to rest directly on your skin. « hands off, kuroo » you order him with a slap on the back of his hand. an offended gasp leaves his lips, yet he complies reluctantly, thinking that your partner probably already knows everything that needs to be known about him.

— SUNA

• he doesn’t really mind it... as long as you’re willing to cuddle once you get back from practice. if you’re not, then he’s gonna start to worry

• because cuddling is probably his favorite ‘boyfriend privilege’ and he doesn’t want it to be taken away from him

• his schedule is pretty tight so he might not be able to attend any of your practices, but he asks you to record it as much as you possibly can so that he can watch the videos with you afterwards

• and seeing how smoothly you and your partner move together definitely doesn’t help with his worrying

it’s been thirty minutes now, and suna’s still not done watching the videos you took today. he loves to share these moments with you, snuggled up against each other the bed ; but most importantly, he has someone to keep his eye on... « babe- are you 100% sure that this was part of the choreography? » he suddenly speaks up, his eyes leaving the screen for the first time. you quirk a curious eyebrow, more surprised by his unusually suspicious tone rather than by the question itself. « oh, the hand on my waist ? yes, rin. it was ». at your words, his lips press into a thin line, he’s obviously far from being convinced. but you know your boyfriend well and you’re quick to reassure him : « you know, his hand might have been on my waist but you’re the one laying in my bed right now ». the frown on his face disappears almost immediately - much faster than you would’ve thought, replaced by a much more confident expression as his hands start to gently stroke your sides up and down. « mmh, i guess you’re right.... i mean, at the end of the day, only i get to have ‘all of this’ for myself » he smirks, playfully eyeing you up and down until he can’t resist the temptation of your slightly parted lips anymore.

— TSUKISHIMA

• tsukki’s not jealous, he’s just... well.. cautious. or at least that’s what he tells you

• but, deep down, he knows that simple cautiousness wouldn’t make spend his days and nights stressing about this new partner of yours...

• so, after a few weeks, his impassible facade starts to crumble a little bit. nothing too extreme, but just enough to let your partner know that you’re taken.

• and he knows he doesn’t need to do much : one of his signature scornful looks is more than enough. especially when he’s staring at your partner dead in the eyes while you’re greeting him with a hug and a kiss after your practice

« tsukishima kei, i’m waiting for an explanation ». with a sigh, your boyfriend drops his book on the table, turning his chair around to face you. « i don’t have one, i already told you. you told me to introduce myself, and i did. end of story ». you both know that tsukki did not just ‘introduce himself’ like any other human being would have done. and that’s precisely what you’re trying to make him admit - because your partner looked genuinely scared during practice today. « wha- no, i didn’t look down on him. it’s not my fault he’s so short... » he mumbles under his breath, trying his best to avoid any eye contact with you. but you know that only a slight tilt of his chin upwards is enough to make his eyes lock with yours - and that this is enough to have him admit anything. « you’re jealous, kei. and it’s painfully obvious by the way... » you smirk - but this smirk disappears in a split second as he slowly gets up from his chair, towering over you like he usually does. « ok, maybe i am. but i just wanted to make sure that he knew his place. and especially mine » he finally admits, his lips spreading in a scornful smirk that would be terrifying if his eyes weren’t filled with the infinite tenderness he has always felt for you.

✔️taglist : @toworuu @catwithangerissues @miyumiya @livy384 @k0u-minamo2 @fullsundear @hsjvwq @mochi-marie @hiraeth-z @velvetvirgos @kirishimas-manly-eyeliner @47meow @japanesevenom @geektastic84 @noir-blanches-blog @idontlikeyourjob @seiri-ami @atiny-grl-with-luv @admiringlove @nachotrash @kellesvt @aintyourholy @Moonlaeli @catchmewiddershins @duhsies @devilgirlcrybabiey @crystal-lilac

#i only have 2 requests left besties :o #so uh- ask away ig <3 #(reading the rules before would be : 😻😻 ngl) #haikyuu!! #haikyuu!! x reader #iwaizumi hajime x reader #miya osamu x reader #kuroo tetsurou x reader #suna rintarou x reader #tsukishima kei x reader #haikyuu headcanons #haikyuu scenarios #haikyuu fluff

[nopelleen]

Perish, Pretty Please (5/5)

ꜱᴜᴍᴍᴀʀʏ: Rick Flag was known to be a pretty good leader, it was the reason why he had been chosen to lead a squad of infamously reckless and idiotic criminals, however it was a lot harder to maintain his authority when one member of the team despised his guts for seemingly no reason.

ᴘᴀɪʀɪɴɢ: Rick Flag x Reader

ᴡᴏʀᴅ ᴄᴏᴜɴᴛ: 5.7k

ɴᴏᴛᴇ: it took me so long, but it’s finally there -- the last part! I started this fanfiction knowing I had a tendency not to finish them and I’m honestly so proud right now, I hope you’ll enjoy this last part as much as I enjoyed writing all of this! (also please let’s all have a moment of silence to remember the moment my hopeful, foolish ass actually posted the first part with “1/2″ in the title)

“Nope, there’s something we gotta take care of first."

You watched with blatant bafflement as the three men nonchalantly walked away from the blazing truck that had been transporting them merely minutes ago. There was almost a bit of disappointment in your heart as you watched the plan you and Cleo had so meticulously orchestrated on your way here vanish into thin air. It was a shame – your rescue plan involved a lot more wow factor. Had you known the outcome of this small drawback, you wouldn’t have put so much effort into it; but how could you have guessed the three of them would find a way out of a van guarded by multiples soldiers all the while handcuffed and therefore supposedly incapacitated? That was absurd.

“Don’t look so surprised, it’s insulting.”

You shot Flag a tight lipped, mocking smile as a response to his friendly jab, clearly recognizing the words you had used against him in the afternoon. Your sardonic grimace poorly mirrored the playful smirk the colonel adorned as he walked towards the van, and you were surprised to feel your heart swell a bit when you noticed his smile spread into a genuine one as he walked past you, slightly shaking his head in amusement.

Without even questioning how they had gotten themselves out of that prickly situation, you whirled around and followed suit as Rick climbed back into the van, telling Milton the small change of plan. That one enthusiastically nodded before happily informing the squad that you’d reach the city by dawn, making you realize you had spent a good chunk of the night at that bar and yet did not feel that tired yet – which might just have been from the adrenaline released into your system at the sight of your three teammates walking out of a blazing vehicle.

“You sleep, I watch Thinker,” Nanaue suggested as he heavily lumbered towards the back of the van, where the hostage was surprisingly staying very still, wise enough not to attempt anything while sharing the same space as King Shark.

Your steps faltered as you entered the van, your gaze hesitatingly flickering towards the seats in the back which appeared way too crowded for your liking. You usually would’ve simply gone back to your seat at the front, but Rick was now occupying the one near the window, probably as a way to stay close to the driver.

With a reluctant sigh, you were about to follow King Shark towards the back when Rick casted a pointed look towards you before patting the seat beside him in case you did not understand.

Relief washed over you and you didn’t even need to give it a second thought before flopping onto the space beside him, glad not to have to settle for a spot anywhere near Peacemaker. Your muscles were stiff as you quite literally bounced onto the cushion, and as soon as your back did as much as graze the backrest, the entire day of walk, hours of dancing and minutes of worrying about Flag’s well-being caught up with you with a dizzying speed.

If earlier that day you had been able to fight off sleep vigorously, you now found yourself melting into the cushion of your seat as soon as you flopped onto it. At first, you remained steadfast, refusing to yield to your basic human needs as you forced yourself to sit up straight, but then there was a strong gravitational pull making you sway a bit on your seat as your head started lolling forward, and then another pull – Rick’s hand, this time – gently steering you back into your seat. Incapable of fending off the drowsiness any longer, you surrendered and finally allowed yourself to loosen up, feeling your head snugly land upon Rick’s shoulder as you drifted off into a soundless sleep.

-----

“Outburst, hey!”

“She’s sleeping.”

From his seat at the very back of the van, Peacemaker frowned as he craned his neck in an attempt to peer at your figure still slumped over Rick’s shoulder. “Well, wake her up,” he groused, tinges of annoyance seeping from his usually polished tone. “She’s… spewing her emotions all over the place. It’s reeking of sadness in there.”

◦◦◦

“It’s reeking in there; crack a window open, will you?”

Your finger harshly jabbed the switch, your gaze remained firmly fixed on the buildings passing by in a blur as the window lowered just a bit in an abrupt, choppy motion. From the corner of your eye, you caught a glimpse of your mother shooting you a brief, curious look. You hadn’t uttered a word ever since you two had left the family reunion. You knew it hadn’t been a good idea to agree to come.

The car then lapsed into another uncomfortable silence. You were both acutely aware of the thick, sweltering acrimony flooding off of you and yet still refused to address it, instead letting you bask in it with your mouth clamped shut, letting it gnaw your insides until your lungs felt charred, incapable of drawing oxygen any longer.

Why had you agreed to this? You were an adult; you didn’t need to expose yourself to this anymore.

You bit the inside of your cheek and tried to breathe in deeply, only for your chest to constrict, becoming painfully hollow. Tears started brimming at the edges of your vision and you finally allowed your lips to part, letting a bated breath stumble out of them with urgency.

“I heard you earlier.”

◦◦◦

“I’m not waking her up,” Rick scowled in one curt sentence, already feeling a bit on edge and therefore not wanting to dwell on the matter.

Peacemaker’s eyebrows furrowed even deeper at Rick’s unwavering tone. He usually dealt easily with negotiation and compromises, he worked well under authority and was a suitable soldier because of it, but at the moment, he couldn’t find it in himself to be patient – maybe because of how thick with tension the atmosphere had become because of you.

“We can feel her,” he insisted again, spitting the words out in an irritated hiss.

◦◦◦

“Honey, I can feel you, tone it down,” your mother complained as she kept her eyes on the road. Either your words went completely over her head, or she refused to acknowledge them, knowing that with the amount of resentment she could feel rolling off of you in waves, there was no way a discussion could lead to a good outcome at the moment. She was already having a hard time not letting the irritation get to her in spite of the smoldering atmosphere.

“I heard you talking to aunt Matty,” you reiterated. “You said it was my fault.”

“What was?”

“Dad leaving.”

The uttered words dropped like thunder in the car, leaving the air charged with electricity.

“I didn’t say that,” she rebutted with a bit of an acerbic tone. The tension was starting to get to her, slowly but steadily eating away at her mind in spite of her resolve. She could feel the resentment seeping into her like a foreign body infiltrating her immune system, but paradoxically, the angrier she got, the less willing she was to fight it off. “Don’t twist my words, you know I hate when you do that.”

◦◦◦

“I didn’t say she wasn’t allowed to sleep,” Peacemaker clarified, starting to sound a bit agitated as the tensed atmosphere got more and more on his nerves. “I’m simply saying she shouldn’t until we are.”

“She’s not hurting anyone.”

◦◦◦

“You said I was hurting him.”

“I said he was often on the wrong end of your temper. Listen, it’s—”

“Back off!”

◦◦◦

“Back off,” Rick sternly admonished him as soon as Peacemaker made a step towards the front of the bus, protectively wrapping an arm around your sleeping form. “She needs to rest. She got shot acting as a distraction so your team could make a smooth entrance, remember?” he reminded the man scornfully.

Peacemaker’s face remained calm in spite of the irritation coloring his eyes. His gaze briefly flickered from you to Flag, hesitating.

“Don’t make me repeat myself.”

◦◦◦

“You know how you made him feel,” your mother uttered, efficiently putting an end to the exchange.

You remembered the times during which you were moody, when you came back home after having spent the entire day feeling everyone’s emotions around you, when your father did as much as try to talk to you about it, thus instantly setting you off. He was always the spark that ignited you. Whether he was inquiring about your day, or commenting on your behavior, or even just standing a bit too close to you… He’d end up angry, hurt, aggressive – whatever you were feeling at the moment, he’d always end up feeling it too.

Your mother was just wise enough to stay away.

But you also remembered the shouts in the kitchen, the jabs, the constant bickering between them. You remembered listening to it from the stairs and then being blamed for their bad tempers. You’d be blamed for the anger, the aggressiveness, the slaps that so often echoed through the house.

She was wise enough to stay away, and yet be close enough when she’d need an excuse.

“It wasn’t just me,” you whispered through gritted teeth.

“I never said it was.”

“It was you,” you spat out as you whipped your head towards her. “You made him miserable.”

Your eyes were completely focused on her face, her pursed lips and closed-off features, and never once did you notice the way her foot slowly started pressing further onto the accelerator.

◦◦◦

You woke up with a start and instantly casted a frantic gaze around you, expecting the usual blaring horns and shouts that followed this exchange. You were surprised to find yourself in a safe environment, all wrapped up in an unexpected warm, comforting atmosphere. Usually, the second you woke up, your instincts picked up on the foul aura of anguish you had unconsciously secreted into the air, and yet, here, you could feel nothing but utter peacefulness.

One of your eyebrows formed an elegant arch as you lowered your gaze to glimpse at the warm weight wrapped around you, only for your eyes to land on a familiar calloused hand hanging from your shoulder and almost grazing your cheek. You felt a faint smile tenderly pulling at the corners of your lips before even turning your head to confirm the identity of the owner of the arm wrapped around your shoulders, and when you turned your head to direct your gaze towards Flag’s sleeping face, you simply found yourself incapable to fight it off anymore.

Then, with a fond smile pulling at the corners of your lips, you snugly nestled you head back into his side and shut your eyes, this time knowing for a fact that you wouldn’t risk infuse the atmosphere with anything else than a blissful quietude.

◦◦◦

It was chaos. Utter chaos.

Your car was long abandoned a few feet away from you, fuming after having hit another vehicle in the middle of an intersection. The driver who had started fighting with you was now in a fully blown-out fist fight with another man who had merely tried to step in for you, and the more people got out of their cars to understand what was going on, the more people got trapped under your influence and started fighting, some going as far as purposefully ramming their vehicle into another’s.

Your voice was hoarse from shouting at the driver who had first attacked you and you were now trembling with anger as you watched an entire riot unfold before your very eyes, unconsciously fueling it with intense waves of rage that'd hit any innocent that'd happen to walk a bit to close to the scene.

Someone gripped your shoulder and you tried to jerk away from the touch, whirling your head towards the person with your teeth bared, ready to attack whoever was trying to get your attention.

“Honey, focus on me, alright? Focus on me.”

The voice was rough, the tone frenzied, and yet when the hands grasped your shoulders, it was with an unexpected gentleness. The fingers were quivering with restraint, barely managing not to dig into your skin in an attempt to snap you out of it.

This staggering tenderness startled you so much that it managed to take you out of your trance for a fleeting moment, allowing reason to take over as you fought back the instinctive urge to shove the hands away. With frantic, brimming eyes, you diverted your gaze towards your mother, desperate for a comforting point of focus to latch onto like a lifeline.

A sob threatened to crawl up your throat as soon as you met her eyes. There, in the midst of all the hardly concealed anger – a glint of affection, a vacillating spike of tenderness battling to emerge from under all that vibrating rage your mind was forcefully pushing into her. With a choked-up breath of relief, you instinctively stepped forward, latching onto that abiding twinkle of kindness in spite of all that surrounding violence like a lifeline.

Then, when there was an anticipated screeching of tires coming from your side, a glimpse of grey metal flashing out of the corner of your eye, and an oh-so-familiar harrowing feeling of dread seizing your insides, you kept your eyes unwaveringly locked into your mother’s, resolutely shutting out everything else around you. You bored your gaze into hers and let your mind soak in her warmth.

The car never came, the shouts quietened down, your surroundings slowed down until coming to a complete halt, time stalled and your dream mercifully stepped away from your memories to spare you.

You stood there for ages lost into your mother’s loving gaze, until – having strayed too far from reality – your subconscious lost all senses of what was and wasn’t at the time and let the scene morph into whatever your mind desired. Then, when the voice spoke up again, it wasn’t your mother standing before you anymore,  but a person you now trusted more than you ever thought you would.

“Don’t be scared of me.”

 -----

“We need to help these people.”

The words went completely over your head as you despairingly gaped at the glass in front of you, feeling cold to your bones.

You had gotten a bad feeling as soon as the elevator doors had cracked open.

There hadn’t even been time to make a step forward before you had gotten hit by the foul, repugnant thickness sullying the air with a strength that almost had you rearing your head back a bit. For a dizzying second, the vile and nauseating reek had left you standing there, blearily blinking as your senses had desperately struggled to accommodate to the repellent atmosphere. Yet, in spite of the tears brimming at the corners of your eyes just from the sheer despondency emanating from the place, you had been far from imagining the atrocity, the barbarism of the experiments that were taking place down here.

Despite your reluctance, you had been forced to follow the others as they had stalked out of the elevator, engaging into the dark and humid place with feeble, hesitant steps. As you had all crossed the small entrance leading to the laboratory, you had needed to fight your instincts that they had urgently pleaded you to simply whirl around and run back into the elevator.

Every breath you had taken weighed heavily on your tongue, the pungency sticking to the walls of your throat and poisoning your lungs. Every other second you had spent down there had simply felt like another year taken off your life, the wretched atmosphere slowly eating away at your brain like acid.

In spite of all of that, it had taken some time for the horror to truly dawn on you.

The despair had crept into your heart with every step you had made into the cellar, and then, when you had gotten to the center of it, you had felt for the very first time of your life an intense claustrophobia swarming your heart. Surrounded by a sea of decaying bodies all bound together by the same searing, devastating agony, the hostile basement had quickly gone from a gruesome laboratory to a deadly trap slowly closing in on you.

With nothing but wandering bodies all around you, you felt at the bottom of a pit of wretchedness, your head swelling with an intense, overwhelming pain. It was as though you were entrapped in the center of a microwave which was channeling thousands of screams directly towards your brain instead of radiations, however one of them was significantly stronger than the others and seemed to come from the wide glass wall right in front of you.

“Impossible, dear. They’re corpses below those stars.”

In spite of the searing agony flaring through your chest, your heartbeat seemed to slow down and settle onto a numbing, soporific pace as you unconsciously started stepping towards the wide glass, as though bewitched by the heart-wrenching wail you felt coming from whatever was hiding in that liquid.

With trembling, tentative fingers, you lifted your hand and slowly pressed your palm against the freezing glass, yearning to soothe the poor sufferer from their wrenching agony. The pain only seemed to intensify at the touch, the feeling of desolation gripping your insides as your ears started ringing, completely isolating you from the others. There was nothing else in that room but you and a desolated martyr screaming with thousand of voices right into your mind.

You watched with mournful, brimming eyes as the dark figure behind the glass started stirring until a single, colossal eye revealed itself in front of you, appearing emotionless to any common spectator and yet emitting an amount of woe that would’ve had you on your knees had you not gotten so used to sensing people’s emotions.

“Outburst?”

Rick’s voice rose up right behind you but still didn’t startle you, your eyes riveted onto the creature before you with rapt focus.

“It’s in pain,” you croaked out, the faint words scraping your dry throat like some sandpaper grating your vocal cords. “It’s in so much pain.” You shifted your fingers a bit, as if trying to press your hand closer to the glass, get closer to that strange creature, completely blind to the danger it represented. The tentacles, bumps and single eye did not matter – all you could see was the utter suffering it was in.

“Well,” the Thinker unabashedly butted in, “if I’m not mistaken regarding the purpose of your self-righteous egomaniacal mission – not for much longer.”

His words dawned on you with a dry clarity and had you shifting away from the glass in one brisk motion to whirl your head towards Rick. “We can’t kill it,” you asserted with an adamant, steadfast tone that did not match the slight waver in your voice.

“We have orders.”

Rick’s steadfast voice was way more convincing than yours, and what would’ve usually been a mere reminder of his status as colonel felt like a frustrating hindrance that only heightened the desperation swarming your heart and made you let go of the glass to tighten your fists as you turned around to fully face him.

“No, we can’t, we have to help it, it’s—”

“It’s dangerous,” Rick cut you off, his distrust-colored eyes briefly flickering towards the glass wall.

“It’s suffering!”

Your distressed screech echoed through the cellar, your plea painfully reverberating on the walls and splattering the frantic desperation dripping from your tone all around the basement.

For a fleeting moment, Flag remained speechless, as if hit with full force by the intensity of your despair. During that fleeting moment, you caught a glimpse of the hesitation flashing in his eyes, the way he seemed to ponder over the situation for even just a second, wondering what to do and which way to choose. Then, his gaze flickered to the side, briefly meeting Peacemaker’s, and you were able to pinpoint the exact moment he put his guards up again, welding back on his old mask of professionalism to tightly shut out any emotion you could try to induce in him.

There was a subtle shift in his expression, so subtle you might not even have noticed had you not been so desperately seeking any trace of support on his features. Instead of showing the understanding you were so badly hoping for, the traits of his face hardened, the glint in his eyes dimmed, and then you weren’t standing before Rick anymore, you were facing the colonel, towering over you with his back straight and his orders engraved in his mind.

You were acutely aware of the fact that the mission outweighed you; you had just hoped Rick would hold enough respect towards you to give your words the slightest bit of consideration. Apparently, this respect only allowed you one minute of his time before he completely shut you out.

With a sharp, regretful sigh, he took a step towards you and grabbed your arm with a gentle reluctance that contrasted with the harshness of his tone as he said that you needed to go with the other team.

You tried to protest but his strides were long and hasty, and before you even knew it, he was punching the first-floor button of the elevator as you stood inside of it, stunned.

Just as the doors started closing before you, you feebly parted your lips to utter one last plead; your pained, wavering voice coming out laced with betrayal. “You said I could trust you.”

When he had seemed ready to turn away as soon as the doors started closing between you, Rick’s attention seemed to be piqued by your words as he shifted his gaze back onto you, lingering in front of the elevator for just a second more.

The distress coloring your eyes melted into a sullen resignation as soon as your gaze bored into his, your chest constricting with dejection. There, under the thick coat of seriousness, in the midst of all the restrained belligerence this place inspired him, no glint of affection was to be found, no spike of tenderness desperately trying to emerge from the vibrating anger – nothing but cold, glaring callousness.

Not Rick.

Colonel.

-----

“Where’s Flag?”

Bloodsport turned his gaze towards you, and you instantly recognized the apologetic look in his eyes.

As he grimly shook his head, you finally experienced it firsthand – the agony of a thousand people.

-----

“Apparently Waller sent something to his hospital room. People are joking and saying she sent flowers, but if you want my opinion the old hag probably sent him a reminder that his contract doesn’t cover paid sick leaves.”

The voice, just like the steps accompanying it, echoed through the corridor and kept getting closer to your cell, undoubtedly coming from yet another guard who’d attempt to get a word or a reaction out of you – anything that’d stop them from having to book in an appointment with the jail therapist.

You had seen many of them pass by while you had spent days in a temporary cell during your recovery but hadn’t thought they’d keep on sending them after having transferred back in your old cell this morning.

The landscape change didn’t make any difference for you, as you simply kept on staring at the wall for hours on end with the most irksome gloomy look clouding your features.

You couldn’t think about anything else than Rick.

You didn’t think you had even truly processed it yet. It had happened too fast.

Within the span of a few days, the colonel had somehow gained your trust, slowly leading you to warm up to him by showing you an affection you hadn’t experienced in years. It felt like he had turned your world upside down, made everything brighter with the prospect of saving lives alongside a superior who truly valued you, and then you had made the mistake of letting him out of your sight, forced to walk away from that dreadful laboratory for just a few minutes, and he had died there, the one person on this earth who you could genuinely trust now buried under the rumbles in that bottomless pit of agony.

You had mulled over it what felt like a thousand times already and you just could not figure out how to simply go on with your life. Not when your one chance at a brighter future had been squandered so violently as soon as you had turned your back to it.

Somehow, it felt like your fault.

You had been careless, unfocused. You had forcefully dragged Rick’s attention away from the mission at hand only because you were too weak to handle the downsides of your ability, your eyes pathetically overflowing with tears of empathy as the rest of your team simply tried to achieve the mission. You had distracted Rick as that one had been forced to take you to the elevator like a child, had unconsciously helped Peacemaker steal a secret file and forced Cleo to try and stop him on her own before Flag could come to her aid.

The file had been retrieved, but only after Bloodsport had stopped Peacemaker from coldly eliminating Cleo. Only after Rick’s body had already been left laying soundly in the laboratory.

They had fought with all their might for that file, for those values you had accused Flag of lacking merely days ago, and you hadn’t even been there.

It had been crushing to find out that the trust you held towards him had been misplaced, but it was nothing in comparison to discovering he shouldn’t have trusted you either.

You forcefully swallowed back the lump in your throat when you heard the steps finally come to a halt right by your cell and had a hard time concealing the startled look on your face when a very familiar voice rose up.

“Well well well, from what I’ve heard little princess doesn’t want to eat anymore?”

The hair on the back of your neck stood on end at the falsely dulcet tone dripping with a syrupy looking but dangerously abrasive poison. You had to keep yourself from gritting your teeth as your gaze caught up on Griggs’ silhouette standing before your cell from the corner of your eye.

“You’re not even gonna make an effort for me?” he teased you as his lips spread into a sneering smile that made him look more moronic than sadistic due to the absolute lack of sagacity behind his eyes.

You kept your mouth tightly shut and your eyes riveted to the wall across from you, trying to muster the blankest expression you could not to let him affect you but feeling a peeved expression weighing down on your features nonetheless.

“Aww, guys it looks like we’re gonna have to use the feeding tubes,” Griggs ironically groaned, turning towards his colleagues with a facetious glint in his eyes. One of them instantly stepped up to open the door to your cell, not even needing to think twice about the threat just emitted. “You know how much I hate doing that,” he then kept on jeering, much to the amusement of the other guards.

You waited with anticipation as he stepped into the cell, feeling your entire body buzzing with an overpowering apprehension, not having a clue of what you could do but knowing for a fact that with all the adrenaline slowly being spread into your system, there was no way you’d let Griggs go back to his old mistreatment.

His filthy fingers barely grazed your skin, and, as though electrified, you jumped to your feet, putting some distance between you and him. You kept your eyes determinedly fixated in front of you but could see from the corner of your eye how stunned he was by your abrupt reaction. He had gotten to the unresponsive side of you that had emerged after only a few months here, the poor figure staying down on the ground and no longer batting an eyelash at his constant abuse. His face remained dazed for a fleeting moment before the ghost of a smirk reappeared on his features.

After all, he had broken you once, it’d be no bother to do it a second time.

“What, you go on one mission with Task Force X and then you don’t like me anymore?”

He reached out a hand again, much more aggressively this time, and you jolted away, instinctively bringing a hand up without even knowing if you were willing to take the risk of hitting him.

“Step away from her, Griggs.”

The stone cold words loudly rang through the cell and heavily fell between you both, instantly followed by a deafening silence as Griggs’ hand hovered in the air for a fleeting moment, just inches away from the skin of your arm.

Then, for a dizzying, fleeting moment, it felt as though all the air had been sucked out of the cell.

Chill shivers of relief racked your spine before your brain even had time to process the voice, and then, when the familiarity of it finally sank in, you felt as though some freezing water had been dumped over you, leaving you soaked and shivering in the middle of your cell – only this time Griggs wasn't the cause of it.

You whirled your head towards the entrance of your cell with a vertiginous speed and had to bite back a choked-up noise from stumbling out of your lips when your gaze landed upon the owner of the voice glowering at Griggs with a murderous look in his eyes.

“You’re not supposed to be back yet,” Griggs pointed out sheepishly, letting his arm limply drop to his side now that his focus had been completely taken off of you.

“I was feeling better,” Rick informed him with a tight-lipped smile which then briskly dropped from his features. “Now stand down,” he repeated himself, his voice steadfast and as neutral as he could muster it. “I wouldn’t push my luck if I were you. I’ve seen what you did to her, and I’d love to show you what it feels like to be on the wrong side of the blade.”

The threat made the cell go utterly silent and for just a second, the sweetest second ever, all traces of amusement vanished from Griggs’ suddenly pale face. He looked started, nervous, oh so pathetic, and then when he finally regained his composure enough to quickly muster up the most serious look he could to paint on his pallid features, he had already lost all respect from every occupant of the room.

“You’d risk your job for a bitch who told you to eat shit five minutes into your mission?”

There was an imperceptible twitch on Rick’s features at the reminder. He had to briskly fight off a smirk pulling at the corners of his lips, but you could still discern the faintest glint of amusement in his eyes and had to swallow back a choked-up laugh – your heart swarming with a bunch of overwhelming emotions you couldn’t even identify at the moment.

His eyes briefly flickered to you. “Apparently,” he conceded with the ghost of a smirk playing on his lips, before he cast his gaze back on Griggs and recovered a cold, severe expression. “And, trust me, given how liked you are around here, I don’t think I’d risk more than a paid leave even if I attempted to murder you.”

Yet another sullen silence fell over the cell like a heavy fog, and this time, Griggs made the wise decision of not shattering it, containing his anger within a single huff before stalking out of the cell with heavy steps that made him akin to a stomping child. His colleagues briefly glanced at Rick, not quite knowing what to do, before meeting his eyes and promptly deciding to follow Griggs’ decision.

“You’re alive,” you breathlessly uttered as soon as you were both left alone.

“A bit roughed up, but yes, alive,” he winced back, turning his gaze towards you.

You knew he couldn’t feel the blissful exultation swarming your heart now that your ability was smothered by the collar secured around your neck, but you hoped he could see it in your eyes and in the way you just couldn’t seem to blink those relieved tears away.

Rick took a few steps towards you and let out a bated breath, as if he was finally allowed to exhale, as if he hadn’t been able to feel comfortable until standing near you again – and you then knew for a fact that if he couldn’t see the exultation in your heart, he at least felt it as well.

Without another word, he then tentatively brought a hand up before letting it hover uncertainly in the air. He seemed hesitant as if he wasn’t sure how to act anymore now that his mask of professionalism was gone, and you couldn’t help but let out a short chuckle. This was enough for a single droplet to finally fall from your brimming eyes, and the way Rick’s gaze seemed to soften even more at the sight of it almost led you to shedding a few more.

With utter cautiousness, he brought his hand to your face to brush the stray tear away and then left it there, his warm palm cradling your cheek.

“Looks like I’ve won again,” he said in a breath, the words merely stumbling out of his lips as if he were afraid to break that frail, tender moment of vulnerability between the two of you. His thumb gently stroked your cheek again and you couldn’t help but lean into his touch, your gaze never once leaving his. “I really want to kiss you right now.”

You had once said that the only way for Rick to ever get close to you was for you to give out your last breath, and yet, ever since that very vow you had felt yourself ever-so-slowly opening up to him, as though there was something in the air and it was killing you softly.

Now that the sweet, sweet poison had filled up your lungs – all wrapped up in his arms and boring your gaze into his with a wide-eyed fascination – you chose to completely let go of that vow, braving the risk to perish and merely uttering back two candid, gentle words.

“Pretty please.”

Previous

tag list: @honovi18, @jackdanieltorrance, @mochminnie , @themightyredwood,  @taternuts,  @weallhaveadestiny ,  @derangedcupcake, @to-be-or-not-to-be-2021, @vvipgot7be, @unabashedlyswimmingtimemachine, @lacontroller1991, @navs-bhat,  @monkeyyellowsunshine,  @ajeff855, @brokenwhitegirlsworld, @agirlonfire95, @kingtwhiddleston, @cluelessnitwhit, @davnwillcome, @xoxabs88xox

#dc #tss #the suicide squad #rick flag x reader #rick flag headcanon #rick flag imagine #rick flag fanfiction #joel kinnaman #suicide squad #rick flag one-shot #rick flag x y/n #rick flag x you #colonel rick flag

[ohgodmyeyes]

Hot Wax (Like A Band-Aid)

Luke Skywalker x Reader, 2k words. Modern AU? Mature, but no sex.

Summary: Your infallibly sweet husband, Luke, helps you wax your pussy because you’re too pregnant to do it yourself.

...

"I— um, I'm not sure about this anymore. This stuff is hot."

"Come on, Luke! You promised you'd help!"

Luke looked up at you from between your legs, desperation writ on his face. He had to peek around your belly to do it— you were about eight months pregnant right now, which was why you'd enlisted his help with this in the first place. He might have been nervous, but you weren't about to let him back out now... especially given the fact that it was his baby whose steady growth was preventing you from performing your usual hair-removal ritual.

"I just— I mean, I don't want to hurt you. And anyway, you know I don't care whether or not you—"

"I care," you interrupted him, from your spot on the living room couch. "I like how it feels with no hair down there, and anyway, you've already trimmed everything down to the right length— you don't want to quit with the job only half-finished, do you?" Appealing to Luke's sense of duty, you thought, was the most effective way to get him to do something he didn't really want to do.

"Trimming it was easy," he mumbled, seemingly to himself, as he peered back between your legs as if to examine his own work. "This seems... I don't know, dangerous." He paused. "...You didn't really used to do this by yourself, did you?"

"Of course I used to do it by myself," you told him. You weren't crazy about the idea of a stranger removing the hair from your vulva; you'd always shaved or waxed it yourself. Now that you couldn't see the area in question well enough to perform the task, Luke was the next best option— whether he thought he was or not. "Now, hurry up and start putting it on before it gets too cool. The sooner you get to it, the sooner it'll be over."

Luke sighed in defeat. He was sweet, you thought— sometimes almost too sweet. When you'd told him you needed help with something, he'd agreed right away, before even asking what it was you needed him to do. He was probably thinking, now, that he'd made a mistake; however, you knew that with the right amount of reassurance, he'd do a fine job of grooming your pussy. Luke was good at nearly everything he tried, and you were sure this would be no exception.

"...Alright," he conceded. "Alright, fine. But if I screw up, you're not allowed to get mad, okay?"

"You won't screw up! You'll do just fine." You spread your legs as widely as you could, and went on to instruct him, "Just gather some of the wax up on the little stick, and spread it into a line wherever you want to start. Leave it for a minute or two, and once it's hard enough that it makes a noise when you tap it with your fingernail, it's ready to be pulled off."

"Won't that hurt?" he asked, the concern in his voice coming through loud and clear.

"Of course it'll hurt, but only for a second."

"What if you yell? What if there's blood? ...Wait, this can't hurt the baby, can it?"

"I might yell, but there won't be any blood," you told him. "And no, there's no way this can hurt the baby." You placed a hand gently upon your stomach and smiled. "I think she's asleep right now, anyway," you added. "She won't even notice."

He laughed despite himself. "Still think it's a girl, huh?"

You hadn't opted to find out the sex of your baby; you'd both agreed a surprise was a lot more fun. You had a feeling you were carrying a girl, although Luke happened to disagree.

"I do," you said. "It's just a feeling I have, though— we'll find out soon enough."

"I still can't believe you're doing this for us," he said, peeking around your belly and back up at you one more time. "You're going to be a fantastic mom, you know."

"I'm glad you think so... but you wanna know what I think?"

"What?" he asked, flashing you one of his loveliest smiles.

"I think you're going to be a fantastic esthetician. As long as you don't let the wax get too cold."

"Okay, okay! You just want me to start, then?"

"That's exactly what I want."

He shook his head and sighed again, but that sweet smile didn't leave his face. "Okay. I'm going to start at the bottom, and work my way up. Does that sound alright?"

"Sounds fine to me, Luke. Don't worry, it'll be over in no time."

He went to work, after that— just like he said he would, he started at the bottom, with what felt like an appropriately-thin strip of wax in just the right position. He was quiet while he waited for it to harden, and so were you. Your hand stayed on your belly; the baby still seemed to be asleep.

Luke was going to be a wonderful dad, you thought absently as you waited for that first strip to cool— he'd proven to you over and over throughout the course of your relationship that he was willing to do just about anything for the people he loved. Waxing your pussy was just the most recent manifestation of that willingness, and you appreciated it... especially considering that he didn't care whether you were fuzzy down there or not.

"Okay," he said, after a couple of minutes had passed. "I think it's ready. What do I do now?"

"Can you tap it with your fingernail?" you asked, just to confirm that it was, in fact, time to pull it off.

"Yeah, I can. Do I just... pull?"

"Hold the skin right below the edge of the wax so it's super-tight, and then rip it off as fast as you can."

"'Rip it off'?"

"Yep— just like a band-aid."

You heard him take a deep breath, and then he did exactly as you had told him: He held your skin tight with his fingertip, and proceeded to wrench the strip of wax right off of you. You shrieked, partly because you weren't the one doing it; partly, too, because it stung. It would have stung no matter who'd been doing it.

"I'm sorry!" he said. "Are you alright? I didn't mean to—"

"I'm fine," you laughed. "Actually, it felt exactly the way it's supposed to. How does it look?"

"Like your pussy has a bald spot."

"Well, then you'd better get started on the rest."

Having taken on a more serious expression (Luke always looked quite serious when he was hard at work on something), he glanced up at you, nodded, and went on to complete the task of rendering your pubic area perfectly smooth.

You didn't speak anymore so as not to distract him; he didn't say anything else either, except to confirm, periodically, that you were still alright. Every time you squeaked or squealed or otherwise showed even the slightest hint of discomfort, he looked up at you with concern; however, he didn't deviate from his task. By the time he'd worked his way up to the spot just beneath where your belly bulged out, he seemed as though he'd grown quite comfortable with the process.

"Looks like I'm just about done," he said, as he spread one last strip across your mound. "How do you feel?"

"A lot better," you answered, and that was the truth. Not being able to do this job for yourself happened to be one of your least favourite parts of being heavily pregnant. It was worth it, of course; you'd always wanted a family with Luke... but carrying a child did come with its fair share of frustrations and inconveniences. You were glad to have someone like him, who was willing to help you with whatever you needed, whenever you needed it.

Luke, you mused, was an infallibly sweet man— you'd always considered yourself very lucky to have him, and the fact that he was willing to do this for you only served to drive that point home.

By the time you'd finished contemplating how wonderful he was, he'd warned you that he was about to pull off the final wax strip. You told him to go right ahead, and so he did— and with one final pinch (and shriek), the task was complete.

"You have a pretty pussy," he said admiringly, running a finger along the edge of your outer labia. You looked around your belly and at his face; he was smiling again. It made you smile, too.

"Only thanks to you," you said. "I can't tell you how much it means to me that you helped me with that— it was driving me nuts."

"It wasn't as hard as I thought it'd be," he admitted. "I just didn't want to hurt you— you, or the baby."

"You didn't," you said, heaving yourself back up into a seated position (Luke, being the gentleman that he was, helped you by taking your hand and giving it a gentle tug as you did). "We're both just fine. Although I do think I might have woken her up with all my yelling."

"She— I mean he— woke up? How do you know?" He got to his feet, and then sat down beside you on the couch, eyes trained on your stomach.

You gave him a look, and took his wrist in your hand. "She's kicking," you told him. "Right about... here." You placed his palm on the upper part of your belly, just a few inches above your navel. You couldn't actually tell if the baby was kicking or punching right now, but she was certainly doing something, and you had no doubt that her father would want to feel it, too.

He waited a few moments, staring curiously at his own hand. Then, all of a sudden, a broad smile completely overtook his features.

"Feel that?" you asked, with a grin of your own.

"Yeah— yeah, I did feel it!"

"Strong, isn't she?"

He appeared to think for a moment. "...Maybe you're right," he said. "Maybe it is a girl."

"What makes you say that?"

"All the strongest people I know are girls. You, my sister— my mom, too, from what my dad always tells me." He took his hand off your belly then, and leaned in closely to offer you a kiss. "Do you know how proud I'll be if our baby turns out to be even half the person you are?"

You looked into his eyes, which were absolutely brimming with love. Yes, you thought— you really were very lucky to have somebody like Luke to share your life with.

"Whether it's a boy or a girl," you said to him, "I hope they turn out to be just like you— kind and loving, and always willing to help anyone who needs them... even if the thing they need help with is kind of awkward." Like pussy-waxing, you thought. "You know that's why I fell in love with you in the first place, right?"

He blushed, which he'd always been prone to doing. "You're too nice to me," he said. "I just didn't want to hurt you— I wasn't going to tell you I couldn't do it without at least trying first."

"That's why you're a perfect husband, Luke... and it's why you're going to be a perfect dad, too."

You put your arms around him after that, and drew him in as closely as you could to give him a tight squeeze. He hugged you back, and went on to whisper something into your ear... something about heading to the bedroom, for the purpose of more thoroughly checking his work.

With a giggle, you nodded emphatically, and watched as he stood up. Once he'd deftly helped you to your feet, you sauntered off together hand-in-hand, down the hallway and in the direction of your favourite place to spend time together.

All of your 'spending time' together might have been the very reason you couldn't wax your own pussy today... however, not being able to see between your own legs for a few months was a tiny sacrifice, given all of the wonderful things that came with being tied to somebody as kind and generous as Luke.

#luke skywalker #luke skywalker x reader #luke skywalker x y/n #fanfic #star wars #pregnant #pregnancy #pregnant reader #pussy wax #waxing

[whitefawnn]

blood letting (part 8)

c!wilbur soot x reader

warnings: blood, derealization, injuries, toxic relationships, panic attacks

masterlist of bloodletting

note: read the warnings

Morning came as an unwelcome bright light in my eyes. At least for once I recounted the events of the night before, but I wasn’t proud of how many tears I had shed. Not able to keep it together, not able to get the words out to Sam, at least Wilbur seemed okay. I gently ran my hand through his hair, pushing it out of the way of his eyes. The white streak now swallowed by auburn pushed back against his head. His face twitched slightly but went back to a calm expression as time passed between us accompanied by the quiet singing of birds outside. I let myself enjoy the moment of peace.

I’m glad that he could sleep undisturbed, even if just for a little while, his face as still as a resting lake. I gathered my strength to get out of bed, my mission to find Sam going into action as soon as my feet met the cold floor. We needed to plan for the coming attack from Dream. He needed to know everything I could remember, and if that meant pushing myself, so be it. Pulling myself together I left, the last sight my grim face reflected in a mirror on the wall.

My house was empty, the only sound that echoed through the familiar halls was my feet padding into the main room. Somehow the cold floor had become a reassuring discomfort the more I walked, the cool wood punctuating the air that entered my lungs. I found Sam, collapsed on my couch, face one of disquiet. His position was rigid, not one of rest or calm. He was only covered by a blanket far too small for his large form, the sight made me feel guilty. If I had been able to keep myself together I would have at least been able to afford him the simple convenience of a bigger blanket. I made my way over, gently shaking his shoulder. He always looked different without his intimidating mask. His mouth visible, sharp teeth peaking into his smile whenever he granted such pleasure.

“Sam?” I whispered, trying to bring him out of his sleep as gently as possible. I jumped as his green eyes snapped open, softening as they recognized me. He quickly pulled me into a hug with him on the couch. My cheek pressed against his chest as it steadily rose and fell. “Good morning, Sam.” I giggled as he hugged me tighter. I think in that moment we agreed to forget for a while, one second of amity,, only our shared breathing.

“I was so worried, y/n” I let myself melt as he began to play with my hair. “Wilbur being back, dream getting out, and you went missing. I was just so fucking glad to see you okay yesterday, bear.” I nodded my head into his chest, releasing a breathy sigh. I can’t allow myself to cry again.

“Wouldn’t want to ever leave you, Sammy.” I said with a quavering voice. He hummed, the sound vibrating through him. He motioned for me to move as he sat up on the worn couch. I weakly smiled as I studied his face. An unconscious way to make sure he was okay. My eyes fell into the habit of tracing the familiar scar that ran across his nose. A jagged reminder of a story he never would tell me. “Guess we gotta get into what’s important, huh” I steeled myself, running my hand down my thighs. “Dream wants revenge, Sam.”

“I guess I figured that.” I watched as he pushed his hair back, the former styling having become messy through the night of turbulent sleep.

“I’m scared, he had this map of everything with all these arrows. He was being so meticulous, Sammy.” his brows furrowed as he looked at me, my arms now wrapped around myself. Dream could be right behind me right now and I don’t think I’d be able to fight back with any great strength. I let that sink in, I was helpless against the monster, I even struggled to speak of him.

“I won’t let him near you, bear.” I gave him a weak smile. “I’m gonna get him back in Pandora's box, I promise.”

“I believe you, I do, but we need to be more careful. I don’t think I could stand losing anyone.” Sam nodded with a serious expression “No one can be a weak point, Sam. I saw his plan, and I think he intends to pick us off one by one.” I shiver as I look away from Sam, not able to bare the intense eye contact. His green eyes reminded me of the last person I wished to think of being psychically in a room with. Dream’s hands lingering on me, burning points on my arms.

“I understand, y/n. I’m going to go tell everyone, okay? Can you and Wilbur meet me at the prison in a few hours? I think the safest bet we have right now is to gather there.” I absently nodded my head, standing up and leading him to the door. He looked at me, my eyes meeting his own, a tension building between us. “I will keep you safe, bear.” I fell into him.

“Please be okay, Sammy.” I mumbled into his chest as I let him wrap his arms around me once again, leaning into the warmth. He left with a determined look and a quick pace headed straight for the prime path. I just hoped we could get everyone in time. I sighed, my shoulders falling as I turned to see Wilbur in the entrance to the hallway. “wil,” I whimpered, rushing over to him, finally letting myself cry. Hot tears ran down my face as he held me.

“hello, my love” he mumbled into my hair. I breathed in as he gently swayed us back and forth. “I think we have a lot to talk about.” I winced at the words. “What did Dream do, darling?” Sam had to have said something. He had been my confidant as my life had taken a turn for the worse after Wilbur died. Him right by my side as I sobbed, him right there as I let myself get hurt in the worst possible way. Now it’s like I stood in front of all I lost, having to explain who I had become without him.

“Did Sam tell you something?” I inquired.

“not in any great detail.” I pursed my lips, not wanting to give away unneeded information. Any expression feeling like a hint I needed to desperately cover.

“wil,” How could I tell him? I didn’t want him to feel guilty for what was surely my own fault.

“y/n, I just want to help.” His scarlet eyes burned into me, and his cold hands on my arms suddenly didn’t feel comforting. I gently slid away from him, wandering to the kitchen with a far away feeling.

————————-

‘one, two, three’ seconds to count, moments to lose, lives to take. Dream found himself inpatient as he waited. He knew he couldn’t give them much time to prepare, but he also knew he couldn’t rush in. If he fucked this up he’d find himself right back where he began, miserable. Days spent counting the seconds between each purple drip from the crying obsidian in his cell. Scribbling in fucking books just to burn the pages and watch how the paper shriveled and turned black, engulfed by flame. Return to writing memories just to see them burn. He could feel the ghosts of heat licking at his face from the lava that bubbled as a makeshift wall when he stared down at the large map.

“one, two, three” he mumbled as he counted the lives everyone had left. Tommy, Tubbo, and Wilbur only had one. Sam had three. Quackity had two. Y/n had two. He knew their overall survival depended on how they acted in the moment, he didn’t want to kill everyone, not really. A select few, yes, we’re destined to die by his hand, but not every measly person deserved such a fate. Though he dreamed of blood on his hands, Quackity’s face when he realized he was just as helpless as he had been when he got that godforsaken scar on his face. That his obsession with power and money had gotten him nowhere.

“y/n,” he ran the name on his mouth, a sweet taste, an interesting predicament. He couldn’t decide what to do with them. The past that drew out between the two leaving a red string tying them together. If they would get in the way, if Wilbur would in turn, they would become more of an issue than they were worth. He would finally be willing to cut that tie. He’d hoped they had already given up on their pitiful attempt at fighting back. Pushed so far that they had finally snapped. A shattered mirror, unrecognizable, just as they had been after Wilbur’s untimely end.

————————-

“y/n, please,” I forced myself to turn around, looking at Wilbur’s worried expression. I didn’t know if I wanted to tell him, I didn’t know if I could. Those words were stuck in my mouth, burning my tongue. Something wouldn’t let me let them go. I was cursed with this weight and I couldn’t shake it off. I spun around again, beginning to make us breakfast. Grabbing a dull knife and fresh fruit that had somehow found its way into my fridge. I poured myself into this meaningless task so I didn’t have to be me. I didn’t want to face the reality of what had happened, I wanted to go back to being nothing at all.

“How do you want your eggs?” I asked him as I cut the fruit and placed it into a small bowl. I tensed at the sound of him groaning, a sound of frustration, a sound that meant I had done something wrong.

“Please?” I can’t do this right now. I felt my hand tense around the blade as he pushed for an answer.

“Please? please what Wilbur?” a sharp pain erupted from my hand “I can’t tell you, I just can’t. I feel like you just keep pushing me into corners, demanding so much- god I can’t just keep giving to you.” I sighed as I turned to look at his shocked expression. His shoulders now slumped and his once pleading face now adorned with a straight mouth. I felt myself tense as he moved to speak, guilt flooding into me. “I’m sorry,” I mumbled out, allowing my own posture to fall.

“I just want to be better for you.” he mumbled with his head bowed, eyes falling to the tile floor. The confession woven into our shared silence made the air feel tangible. “and- and I just keep fucking it up, I know I do, I made you come with me and Dream, and I didn’t even fucking consider that he could have done something to you, I didn’t listen, and then I just let him hurt you again.” I watched with bated breath as he stepped away from me. “y/n I can’t forgive myself. I deserve how Sam treated me because I’m not fucking good for you. I’m not good for anyone for fucks sake.” He took a shuddering breath as he pushed his hands through his unruly hair “and I’m so selfish cause I don’t think I could bear to let you go.” I stood shocked as his eyes remained glued to the floor.

“Dream-” I paused to look down at my hands, stunned by the way I was bleeding from a cut. Wilbur, confused by my silence, looked up to where my widened eyes were watching an open wound.

“Shit, are you alright?” he asked, reaching out to take my injured hand. I looked up to

see his expression, not comforted by what I found. His pupils were now blown wide as I watched him visibly fight back some crawling instinct that had beseeched him at the sight of my pooling blood.

“I’m fine.” I shuttered, pulling my hand out of his gentle grasp. He looked up at me with a new found clarity in his maroon eyes, shaking his head.

“Sorry, fuck,” he muttered, quickly walking over to the sink to wash the blood that had gotten on his hands. He was once again tense.

“Maybe we’re both bad for each other.” I whispered as I watched him scrub at his hands.

“please don’t say that” his voice wavering with the request.

“Look at us, Wilbur! You can’t say this is healthy?” I felt tears well up in my eyes as he stood there. I didn’t want to believe it either.

“please,”

“Wilbur, I want to tell you, I want to tell you everything that happened but, I’m pathetic, I can’t find the words, it's like I'm choking on nothing.” Wilbur reached to turn off the facet, yet he didn’t turn to face me. “I can’t- I can’t” He placed his hands on either side of the sink as he took calculated breaths seemingly trying to calm his own nerves.

————————-

‘Just breathe,’ He shook the water from his hands and into the sink, still not daring to turn and face y/n. Not wanting to risk seeing their injury, their blood, to fall right into that version of himself. The version that had come back a monster, a parasite made to use those around him.

“Wilbur- what if the stuff with Dream was my fault.” Y/n’s voice wavered as they seemed to slip into blaming themselves. The words made his emotions build. The situation seemingly impossible to solve due to y/n’s own feelings of their involvement in a situation he couldn’t even begin to guess.

“What did he do, love?” He begged, his hands finding their way to the edge of the basin again, his tight grip making his knuckles bloom white. Y/n stood stunned as they studied the way blood began to drip from their hand now. They made no move to bandage the injury. A deafening silence drew out between the two. Filled then with the sound of y/n’s panicked breathing. Wilbur pivoted to see their eyes still locked on their hand as tears slipped down their face.

“fuck, we really need to get that wrapped” Wilbur stared at the blood that was now dripping on to the white tiles, splattering across the pristine floor. Red contrasting against the pale flooring, the sight making his head spin. He found himself whimpering as he tried to get y/n to the sink to clean their hand.

“I’m sorry,” they cried as they pushed their hand under the water turning the water in the sink a light pink as it splashed against the metal.

“Please don’t be sorry anymore, you’ve done nothing wrong, okay? I’ll be right back, you stay right here.” Wilbur made his way to the first aid kit, rushing back to bandage the wound. He made quick work of the injury using his tactile hands. Applying the wrapping felt like second nature due to his own hand wraps he had been using since he got back. “none of this is your fault, especially if it has to do with Dream.” y/n weakly nodded as they leaned into Wilbur.

“Sam needs us to meet at the prison, he’s gathering everyone. I want you to ask him about it, I just-“ They pushed as they took a deep breath.

“That's okay, my love.” Wilbur gently ran his hands through their hair, brushing down the strands that had become unruly.

#wilbur soot x reader #wilbur x reader #mcyt insert

[juniorgman187]

The Bones (Reid Series) Part 2

Summary: After doing an even deeper dive on Valerie’s past, Spencer finally meets her, but his invasiveness isn’t the worst part ... the worst part is he might actually like her. 

Playlist: “The Bones” by Maren Morris & Hozier  (BONUS: song includes major foreshadowing) Category: Series, Fluff, Soft Angst, Eventual smut and *NSFW content Pairing: Spencer Reid POV x Fem!OC - Valerie Content Warning: invasion of privacy, allusions to Maeve’s death, arrhythmia Word Count: 3.4k

Part 1 |

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 

After firmly deciding not to weave Penelope into my tangled web, I was met with the arduous burden of conducting my own research. 

Firstly, I would need a computer - yeah ... a computer. That’s how far I was willing to go for this pursuit. I once vowed never to fall victim to modern technology’s clutches, and yet here I was, doing my research on a public library’s computer. To my credit, I hadn’t gone out and bought one, I was merely using my resources.

With the need for a device out of the way, all that was left was the knowledge of what to look for. But that didn’t pose a problem either.

Funny enough, with as many rules and restrictions as there are regarding patient privacy and confidentiality, all it took was matching dates of news stories with hospital records to complete my research. I was fairly certain I was only scratching the surface of information about Valerie as opposed to the sea of things I could’ve uncovered if I asked for Garcia’s help, but there are only so many lines a person can cross in one week. 

This was my limit.

Call me naive, but I was actually quite surprised with just how expansive the internet is. To an almost relentless degree, I would open an article and it would lead me to ten more about the same topic. It was this never ending rabbit hole that seemed to spiral on forever. I kept digging deeper and deeper until I could no longer dig. 

I’d officially hit rock bottom. 

It took me a grand total of just two hours to unearth all the ‘dirt’ I could on a young Valerie Bishop. 

Local 16-year-old Wins Nevada’s Statewide Art Contest! Published by Henderson Press. 

Valerie, just a sophomore in high school at the time, was donning what any experimental teen girl would’ve worn in the early 2000s - bootcut jeans and a sequin blouse over top of a plain camisole. And if I zoomed in close enough, I could spot the evidence of a sparkly blue shadow coating her eyelids. Surprisingly, though, that wasn’t the first thing I noticed. 

It was that smile. That tooth-achingly sweet smile. 

Though I never got the chance to see Maeve truly smile, that’s what I imagined it would look like. 

The photographer must’ve caught her midway through a laugh, at least that’s what the image of her slightly open-mouthed grin told me. Meanwhile, her two tiny hands were clenching her overbearingly large trophy while her artwork stood behind her as the background.

It didn’t take me long to figure out why her painting won. Simply put, there was no need to see anyone else’s art to know that they couldn’t possibly compete with hers. 

Hers was an abstract rendition of what I believe to be a forest of some sort. The detail is what I was most drawn to. It would’ve been unbelievable on its own but the fact that she was 16 when she painted it? That’s what was unbelievable to me. 

If that’s how talented she was at that age, I could only imagine how much more talented she became with time. However, I lost the chance to investigate the current state of her skill before a related article from The Cleveland Gazette about Valerie succeeded this one. 

From Award-Winning Artist to Henderson’s Hero

Read my interview with 17-year-old Valerie Bishop to find out more about her struggle with arrhythmia and how she turned her pain into a project! 

By Kelli Gallagher from the Cleveland Gazette. 

Gallagher: Thank you so much for letting me interview you, Valerie. 

Bishop: Of course! I’m happy to. 

Gallagher: You’ve become somewhat of a hero in Henderson, Nevada, haven’t you?

Bishop: I wouldn’t call myself a hero ... but if everyone else wants to - I’m fine with that. (laughs)

Gallagher: Don’t be so modest! I mean, what you’ve done is so incredible, and you’re only what? Seventeen?

Bishop: Yes, ma’am. I just turned seventeen this past August. 

Gallagher: Wow, I can’t believe how young you are and yet you’ve already accomplished so much. I saw that you won a statewide art contest last year. Tell me more about that. 

Bishop: That’s a funny story actually. My Grandma Sheila was the one who entered me in that contest. I didn’t even know about it until I won it. She’s always surprising me, though. In fact, she’s the one that surprised me with my first ever art supplies, when I was about eight or so. They were these super expensive oil paints, and I knew she couldn’t afford them, so I told her we should return them and get something cheaper, but she said, “Nonsense. When the bones are good the rest don’t matter. A house don’t fall when the bones are good.” That was kind of her saying. 

A house don’t fall when the bones are good. 

The bones. 

Gallagher: I’m interested to know more about your relationship with your grandma. If I’m remembering correctly, she was also diagnosed with arrhythmia a while back too, right?

Bishop: Yes, she was, but that’s never slowed her down. And as for our relationship, my grandma and I have always been close, but arrhythmia, in a weird way, has brought us even closer. She has always been my biggest supporter and the fact that we’re both on this journey together makes her my biggest supporter even more so. 

Gallagher: Absolutely. Now, I also heard that you’ve started a fundraising program to possibly start a gallery and studio in Virginia Beach. If you don’t mind me asking, why Virginia Beach? Is there any special significance? 

Bishop: Actually, that’s where my grandma met my grandpa, and they got married and started a family there, too. So if Grandma Sheila hadn’t been there to meet him, she wouldn’t have had my mom, and that would mean I wouldn’t have been here either. I like to think Virginia Beach is where it all started. In a way, it’s where my bones are. That solid foundation in Virginia gave me everything I have today.

Gallagher: That is just incredible. I’m so glad to see your fundraising project is thriving, but I can’t imagine any of this has been particularly easy for you. You were diagnosed right around the time your senior year was starting right?

Bishop: Yes ma’am. 

Gallagher: So what brought you from Henderson to Cleveland?

Bishop: Well, actually, I didn’t want to move, especially not before I graduated, but Cleveland has the best cardiovascular hospital in the country and my health is far more important than graduating in the same state I grew up in. So when my parents were willing to move me and my sister out here, I saw it as a privilege rather than something to be sad about. 

Gallagher: I am so inspired by you, Valerie.

Bishop: (laughs) Really, why?

Gallagher: Despite everything that’d been thrown at you, you are still so grateful. I hope you never lose that. 

Bishop: I promise you I won’t.

Gallagher: So one last thing before I go, what is one hope you have for your future self?

Bishop: I hope, future self, that your ‘bones’ are still strong.

Gallagher: Beautiful. Thank you so much again for doing this, Valerie. I sincerely hope you reach your goal and you get to open up that gallery and studio in Virginia Beach. 

At the bottom of the article, there was a footnote from Kelli Gallagher. 

Exactly 10 years later, Bishop was able to move to Virginia Beach and open up her gallery and studio. 

By the end of the article, I felt a genuine sense of pride for Valerie, and I know I had virtually no right to know these things about her, but I could still be proud of her for them right?

I would never fully get my answer to this question before I crossed the final boundary. 

After exhausting all that I could gather from the internet without Penelope’s assistance, the only thing left for me to do was actually meet her in person. However, this would prove to be a bigger obstacle that it seemed. I decided to delay the daunting task until the next day. A decision partially influenced by the phrase, ‘sleep on it.’ I prayed I’d gain clarity on what to do when I woke up the next morning, but even with a night’s rest, I was still undecided as I drove to Virginia Beach once more.

To sit in my car that was conveniently parked right in front of the gallery was a poor choice. Because with every passing second, the temptation to walk in grew, but the fear of regret dampened those impulses. The more I thought about it, the more I psyched myself out. Between my two choices, to freeze or to fight, I should’ve taken the third - to flee. But I was here now and I couldn’t leave empty-handed for a second time. 

After a moment’s indecision, adrenaline coursed through my veins to give me the courage to get out of my car. When I felt an outdoor breeze blow over me, I knew there was no going back now. Right when I walked in, the little bell above the door rang, solidifying that I was officially crossing the threshold, and whether I liked it or not, she was going to see me after hearing me walk in.

“I’ll be right with you!” A small voice called out from somewhere in the back. She was hidden from my immediate sight, and somehow that made it so much worse. It was now I that was waiting for her, instead of her unknowingly waiting for me. 

As though I were prey getting ready to escape a predator, I stayed put by the door. It gave me a full view of the entire place anyway. 

Scoping out my surroundings, I spotted the paintings that were carefully measured and placed on the walls, almost to perfection. I had no time to notice anything more before the person in the back walked out. 

Immediately when I saw her, I knew.

“You’re … not Valerie.” I couldn’t help sounding so disappointed but luckily, the woman that came out took no offense to my observation. 

“No, I’m not,” She laughed. “But I can get her for you-”

“No wait!” I uselessly leapt forward to stop her from saying, “Vee! There’s someone out here to see you!” But that’s precisely what she did anyway. Evidently oblivious of my previous protests, she politely smiled back at me. “She’ll be right out.” 

For the second time that day, I waited with bated breath, anxiously anticipating the arrival of Valerie. And I was almost too focused on subduing the pounding of my heart to realize that she was actually walking out of the back right now. 

“Hi, sorry about that!” A new voice chirped. 

Valerie. 

The moment I laid eyes on her, it became clear to me that the pictures in her files hardly did her justice. Nothing could compare to the real sight of her. I was only able to catch the profile of her face when I saw her in the cafe, but in her entirety, I began to wax nostalgic. Though her face and hair and body had transformed into that of a grown woman’s features, I could still identify the same tooth-achingly sweet smile that a younger Valerie once wore on the front page of the Henderson Press. She was no beast to conquer, she was just a girl, smiling at me in that same gentle way. 

Her expression just as well showed no indication of recognition, not that she would recognize me, considering my letter was anonymous and unless she pulled the same stunt I did, she wouldn’t ever recognize who I was. 

“I’m Val,” She made her greeting to me while untying her dirtied waist apron, and it was merely the action that caused my gaze to fall to her hips, but when she shed the apron, I was still staring. There was something sort of mesmerizing about the way they swayed as she approached. It wasn’t until they stopped swaying completely that I realized they did so because there was no more distance to advance - she was already right there in front of me, patiently watching me stare. 

“Val?” I blinked hard to revert my gaze while also playing into the part that I had no idea who she was. 

“Mhm. Short for Valerie,” She confirmed happily. “Like the Amy Winehouse song.” 

This time, I genuinely didn’t know what she was referring to, and my confused countenance prompted her to clarify, “You don’t know that song?” 

Then, seemingly out of nowhere, she began to playfully sing, “Well, sometimes I go out by myself and I look across the water ...” 

While she watched my face and waited for the recitation of the song to jog my memory, I was just as much studying her face. I could tell she was only kidding when she sang, evidenced by the laugh that followed her rendition, but it sounded so unironically good that I had to question what other talents she possessed. 

“Um, I was actually thinking more like Valerie, the martyred medieval saint, whose name stood for strength and health.” No sooner than the words spilled from my mouth did I recognize the freudian slip - the simultaneous coincidence and confession. The coincidence was that, now, with Maeve’s heart beating in her chest, she lived up to her name - she was newly strong and healthy. But I worried, she would see the correlation I drew between her name and her successful transplant and would realize that I knew more about her than I let on. Did I just give away too much?

“Sorry, I didn’t catch your name earlier. What was it?” Her casual dismissiveness of my previous statement did nothing to ease my worries. Was she beginning to piece everything together?

“Oh, right!” I said dumbly. “S-Spencer. I’m Spencer.” I was such a blubbering bundle of nerves that I actually reached out to shake her hand - a stranger’s hand. 

“Nice to meet you, Spencer,” She softly laughed, which was hopefully not out of the enjoyment of seeing me squirm. “What can I do for you?” 

A loaded question, don’t you think? What can you do for me, Valerie? Well, for one thing, you could’ve answered my letter, but to say something as bold as that would require me to admit the real reason I was here, and how could I do that without mentioning how I found you in the first place?

“Um ...” Whose birthday is the soonest? “My friend Emily’s birthday is coming up and I was wondering if I could possibly buy a painting from you as a birthday present.” 

There was the faintest perceptible skepticism in her expression, but that could’ve just been my paranoia talking because in the next breath, she didn’t suggest a proclivity to my deceit. “Yeah, of course! Do you know what her favorite medium is? Or her favorite artist? Or her favorite style of art?” 

For every addition to the question, I wordlessly shook my head no. Was my lie already unraveling? Could she see right through me?

“No worries. If you want, you can walk around the gallery and tell me if you see anything you think she’d like.” She made her offer to me sweetly, then disappeared into the back room again. I tried to follow her with my eyes for as long as I could, but from where I was standing, I couldn’t see very far into it. I wandered a little further into the center of the gallery to possibly catch a glimpse of what was occupying her time back there, but when I heard the chattering of two voices, Valerie and the other woman, coming from the same general direction, I realized I was completely alone in this part of the studio.

With no one around to bear witness but these portraits, I could’ve easily slipped out and made my escape, and I might’ve even done it had it not been for the unmistakable gravitational pull forcing me to stay here and walk about the room. 

Making my way throughout the gallery, I would pause every now and then when a painting would stand out to me, which was often, considering each picture was impressive. 

But there was one painting in particular that piqued my interest. It made me feel something I’d never felt before. 

It wasn’t special by any means. By rights, I shouldn’t have even noticed it, for it wasn’t the largest painting, nor the smallest one - it wasn’t even the most average painting. But it felt exceptionally ... Valerie. I had no doubt in my mind that she painted this one - in fact, I had a good bet that she painted most of these portraits, if not all of them - but this one. There was just something about it that I couldn’t put my finger on. 

“So,” A draft was created from where Valerie swiftly and unexpectedly joined me at my side. “What do you think?” 

“Um, there’s definitely something,” I struggled to find the word. “appealing about this one.” Almost as soon as the word came out of my mouth, I knew it was only a matter of time before she called out the inadequacy of my answer. 

“Appealing?” She repeated in mockery. “That’s the best you got? Come on, you’ve been standing here for like ten minutes. There must be something about it you like.” 

“I’m not sure.” I honestly admitted with a shrug.

“There’s no wrong answer.” She assured me, but I found that hard to believe. 

“So if I said I see a grizzly bear attacking a UFO, that wouldn’t be wrong?”

“Nope,” She popped the p. “If that’s how you interpret it then that’s how you interpret it. Just because someone else sees it differently, doesn’t mean you’re wrong.” It would’ve sounded like complete bullshit or nauseatingly cheesy coming out of someone else’s mouth, but her delivery felt so genuine. It actually moved me. 

As she said this, she turned her head in my direction to look up at me, causing her shoulder to brush my upper arm, sending a wave of goosebumps all over my body. 

She was so close. 

But I was so unbothered by her proximity that I didn’t even notice exactly how close she really was. If someone else had invaded my personal space like that, I would’ve moved in the opposite direction just on instinct, but I didn’t even think to do that with Valerie. I was so comfortable with her being there. 

But was that just because a part of her was once Maeve’s? Was the entire foundation of my likening to Valerie built upon that single attribute?

Was that my bones?

“Um,” I began fidgeting with my hands to self-soothe. “I like it. I don’t know why. But I like it. How’s that for an answer?”

There was a pause before her response that compelled me to look at her, but when I did so, she was already looking at me. “I’ll take it,” She nodded. “It’s the biggest compliment to me if my art can make you feel something.”

Was it the art that made me feel something ... or you?

“I’ll tell you what,” She walked over to grab something from the front desk. She came back with a small piece of cardstock. “I’m going to an art exhibition next weekend. Why don’t you come with me and see if you can’t find something for Emily there?”

She handed me the paper, which was actually her business card. “You don’t have to have an answer for me today, but call me when you do.” She seemed to think that was the end of the conversation, but I still had more questions. 

“You’re inviting me?” was the first question that came to mind, albeit the dumbest one.

“Yeah, you can be my plus one.”

I gulped to dislodge the lump in my throat. “Like-like your date?” 

She furrowed her brows with mild confusion. “Um ... sure, if that’s what you wanna call it,” which was the last thing she said to me before vanishing within the back room again. 

I peered back down at the card and tapped it gently on the palm on my hand as though to register its presence really being there. 

For all intents and purposes, this card was meaningless. But to me, it was the formal consenting - nay, invitation - to reach out to her again. She was willingly extending this line of contact to me. 

No more public library computers. No more files. No more ‘research.’ Just her number - a way to reach her without veering off my moral compass. 

Despite this, I still had no clue whether or not I was going to accept her offer.

All that I did know was that I wanted to see her again. 

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 

PART 3 COMING SOON!

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[kaalamarii]

Maybe It’s The Thought Of Not Being So Alone (BelphiexMC)

Gender neutral MC!

Warnings: Major spoilers if you haven’t gotten to chapter 16!!!! Fluff, angst, and smut. So many feels. Sad feelings, sorrow, grief, it’s all in here.

I think this is the longest fic I’ve ever written but I’m really proud of it.(also the longest title...who am I, Fall Out Boy) Also, the grammar might be off because for whatever reason I kept switching back and forward between past and present tense? 

Masterlist

Belphegor frowns as, one by one, all of his brothers find excuses to leave the room. He had just walked in, and saw them all sitting at the dining table, talking and joking around like normal. But once he came in, they all grew silent and awkward. He had asked them why they hadn’t gotten him for dinner, and Lucifer muttered something about how they figured he was asleep.

Belphie’s not surprised by this anymore. They’ve been this way for the last couple of weeks. But still, it hurts. Even Beel doesn’t seem to want to be around him these days.

He gets it in a way, he really does. He hurt the human. Still, he’s apologized to them several times, as well as his brothers, and he doesn’t really know what else to do. 

Now that he’s free, he just wants to be able to hang out with his brothers like he always used to before the exchange program. He wants to go to Hell’s Kitchen with Beel, pull pranks on Lucifer with Satan, play games with Levi until he falls asleep. But they aren’t interested anymore. They no longer treat him like a brother, but a stranger.

As much as he wishes he didn’t, he still finds himself resentful of the human, blaming them for the rift between him and his brothers. 

MC comes out of the kitchen, pausing for a moment when they see Belphie sitting at the dining room table alone. “Where’d everyone go?”

Belphie shrugs. “They all had things to do, I guess.”

“Ah,” MC says with a nod. They too have noticed the way the brothers have been avoiding Belphie. While it was understandable to an extent and they were touched the brothers were so protective of them, they did find themself feeling bad for Belphie. “Well, I saved you some dinner. Want me to reheat it for you?”

“You saved me dinner?” Belphie asks, flabbergasted. 

“Of course. I didn’t want you to go hungry.” They grab a container from the fridge with some sort of stir fry in it and throw it into a pan. 

Belphie watches the human as they stir up the food, making sure it heats up enough. He’s actually...touched. “Why are you being so nice to me?”

“What do you mean?” MC asks.

“After all that I did...I don’t deserve this. Why aren’t you mad at me like my brothers are?”

MC gives him a little grin. “Don’t get twisted, I’m still pretty pissed about what happened.”

Belphie averts his eyes in shame.

MC continues, “But I see the effort you’re putting in.” 

They plate his food and hand it to him. “Your brothers will come around, Belphegor. I know they will.”

 Belphie sighs as he finishes his dinner. He’s so tired. And he wishes he could speak to Lilith now. She wouldn’t treat him differently and he wouldn’t feel so lonely with her around. He does have the next best thing, he supposes, thinking back to the human. He can tell they have a part of Lilith in them. Lilith was kind, forgiving, and Belphie sees that in MC too.

Without thinking, he finds himself going to the human’s door. When they answer, they are shocked, maybe even a bit uncomfortable to see him there. 

“Everything alright, Belphie?”

He holds his pillow tightly to his side, also feeling awkward. “Um, do you mind if I come in and hang out with you?”

“Uh. Sure.”

Belphie smiles as he follows the human into the bedroom, closing the door behind him. He immediately sits on the floor, setting his pillow in his lap. MC sits on their bed, legs crossed, and looks down at the demon. Like his brothers, he’s cute despite the potential danger that lies within him. But now, hugging a cow print pillow in his lap, he seems so innocent. During their time here, MC has discovered that though they’re powerful, the demons are as complicated as humans are, with emotions they don’t know how to deal with, resentments and hurt feelings that have run deep for centuries. 

They watch Belphie place his pillow on the floor and lay down on his side, facing away from the human, eyes on the tv that was playing some cheesy romcom from Devilflix. 

“Belphie?”

Belphie turns to look at the human, fully expecting them to kick him out, but pleasantly surprised when they scoot over and pat the bed next to them. “You can come sit up here if you want.”

“Oh,” Belphie responds, uncertain. “Are you sure? I don’t mind lying on the floor.”

“I don’t mind. Wherever is more comfortable for you.”

Belphie looks down at his pillow, then back up at the space next to the human. He scrambles up his pillow and climbs up onto the bed, careful not to get in MC’s space, making sure that his limbs don’t touch theirs. 

The longer the rest of the demons in the house avoid him, the more movie nights there are with MC. Slowly, they get more and more comfortable with each other, sharing a bowl of popcorn and blushing when they reach in at the same time, accidentally touching hands. They put his pillow against the back of the bed and both sit with their backs against it, no space between their sides and shoulders, knees up against each other’s.  

Sometimes they watch comedies and the two of them lean on each other as they laugh. Sometimes they watch thrillers and MC gets squirmy, shutting their eyes and burying their face into Belphie’s shoulder. Usually, Belphie falls asleep and MC adjusts, laying him down so his head is on their lap. They don’t even notice that they run their fingers through his hair, but Belphie does, and he often fakes sleeping so that he can stay in that position.

His brothers quickly start to notice the weekly night time visits with Belphie and MC. Of course, they start to join them. First Mammon and Levi, both jealous and not willing to share. They’re both livid when they see MC and the seventh brother cuddled on the human’s bed. Next comes Beel, happy that the trust in Belphie is coming back. Then comes Asmo, hoping the cuddle sessions will turn into something a little more sexy. Even Satan finds himself in there, making pretentious comments about the movies based on books. 

As happy as Belphie is that his brothers are coming around, he finds himself agitated when they show up. They all fidget too much, talk through the movies, and fight to get MC’s attention.

It becomes too stressful and Belphie stops coming to the movie nights. 

“I haven’t seen you in a while,” MC says one movie night when they go to the kitchen to make popcorn. “You don’t show up for movie night anymore.”

Belphie sighs. “I’m sorry, MC. Sometimes my brothers are too much to handle.”

MC chuckles. “Don’t I know it. What do you say we go out this weekend, just you and I? We’ll go to the theater...I heard ‘Curse of the Succubus’ has a sequel out now.”

Belphie grins at the memory of the time they watched Curse of the Succubus. The human had wrapped their arms around his and laid their head on his chest, telling him to tell them when the scary parts were over. 

“You barely even watched the first one!” he laughs.

“It was scary!”

“It’s supposed to be.”

“Well, you’ll be there to protect me anyway, won’t you?”

Belphie feels a feeling in his stomach and throat he had never felt before. He clears his throat, trying to push it away, whatever it is. His face heats up. “Yeah, of course.”

Belphegor is glad that the sequel is even gorier and has more jump scares than the first. The human squeals and jumps every couple of minutes, holding on to him and digging their face into them just like before. Afterwards, they go out to eat and split dessert. Someone tells them that they’re a cute couple and they both blush and spit out denials. They go for a walk around Devildom, neither of them wanting to end the night.

Belphie is quiet as they walk side by side, taking in all the beauty of the Devildom.

“You okay?” MC asks. 

Belphie nods. “Just thinking.”

“About what?”

“Nothing, it’s not important.”

“Oh, come on, Belph,” MC teases, lightly nudging him with their elbow. 

He sighs, but doesn’t otherwise react to the human’s teasing.

MC frowns, stepping in front of the demon. “Hey…what’s going on?”

“I miss Lilith.”

“Oh.”

MC doesn’t mind the demons bringing up their sister. After all, it was a horrible, tragic loss for all of them, but they had to admit to themself that there was some sort of pressure on them since the boys found out MC’s relation to Lilith.

“I doubt you want to hear how much like her you are,” Belphie continues. “I was lonely a lot after she died-or well, after I thought she died. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I had Beel. But Beel was dealing with his own feelings on it. And then after the attic, I missed her more than ever. And that first night I was in your room, it had nothing to do with you. I just didn’t want to feel so alone anymore.”

MC sighed, unsure what to say.

“But after a while, it wasn’t just being alone. I liked being around you. You’re not just special to me because of Lilith, you know.”

“Thanks, Belphie,” MC replies with a smile. “You’re special to me too, you know.”

“You’re really nice to me. Especially after what I did to you.”

“It’s under the bridge now.”

“I’m glad you’ve forgiven me, MC, but I don’t think my brothers ever will. And I don’t expect them to either. I don’t think I’ll ever forgive myself.”

“Belphie…” MC says, their hand coming up to stroke his cheek. 

“I’ll never hurt you again, MC, I promise.”

“I know.”

They walk back home in silence. He walks them to their room and is shocked when they lean over to give him a good night kiss on the cheek. The two stare at each other for a moment before Belphie goes in to kiss them back and MC turns to catch his kiss with their mouth. The two of them hold the kiss, moving their mouths against each other’s. 

MC opens the door behind them, not breaking the contact between them. They pull him into the room with them, and shutting the door by pressing him against it, their tongue darting into his mouth to rub against his. 

Belphie lets out a quiet groan, returning their kiss. His hands roam up and down their sides before sliding down to their ass, giving a light squeeze. They make their way to the bed, shedding clothing. Side by side, they lay down, hip to hip, groin to groin. 

MC pulls away to pull off their shirt and Belphie leans his head down to plant sloppy kisses on their chest. His mind is going wild as MC arches their back, a soft groan escaping, and grinds their hips into his. 

MC reaches for his belt buckle, and Belphie is filled with desperation. He wants them so bad.

A knock on the door causes them to scramble away from each other, MC throwing their shirt back on. Belphie isn’t sure why, but he feels guilty for putting his hands and lips on the human. It doesn’t get better when he hears his twin’s voice when MC answers their bedroom door.

“MC? Have you seen Belphie? I woke up to get a snack and saw he wasn’t in his bed.”

“Oh, yeah, he’s in here. We just got back from the movies.”

Beel looks into the room and the twins make eye contact. He sees Belphie’s troubled expression and sends him a questioning look back. Belphie sighs. Beel’s gaze goes back to the human, their messy hair, red lips, the embarrassment on their face. MC can tell that Beel knows what was just happening, but they find themself unable to read his expression. Was he jealous? Angry? They weren’t sure.

Desperate to get him out so they can get back to Belphie, they offer him the leftovers from the restaurant they and Belphie ate at. This seems to make Beel happy, but they still sense there’s something else. 

“Listen, MC,” Beel whispers. “If you need anything, you can come to me, okay?”

“Okay…” MC replies, unsure what the demon’s getting at. 

Beel takes one last look at Belphie before heading out.

MC makes their way back to Belphie but his demeanor has changed. “I’m sorry, MC, but I’m going to go to bed. I’m really tired.”

“Oh,” MC says in disappointment. “Sure. Okay.”

“Thanks for tonight,” he says, giving them a quick kiss on the cheek.

It was the first time in a long time, maybe ever in his life, that Belphie couldn’t sleep. He lies there in his bed, staring at the ceiling. He went to the attic, trying to convince himself that the awkwardness from Beel earlier is making him uneasy. But even there, he can’t sleep, no matter how hard he tries.

Thoughts of MC flood his mind. How cute they were at the movies; how their face lit up as they shared dessert; the way they always took care of him and his brothers and how they never brought up how he had killed them. 

As hard as he tries, Belphie can’t stop his thoughts from going back to kissing them. Their soft lips bruising his, the feel of their hands all over his body. Belphie feels himself growing hard as he thinks about what they almost did, but he doesn’t dare touch himself. He doesn’t deserve it. He doesn’t deserve the human, and he certainly doesn’t deserve to put his hands on them after what he had done to them. Though he wants nothing more than to go back to MC and continue where they left off, he doesn’t dare leave the safety of the attic.

Everybody has already left for RAD by the time Belphegor wakes up. He has dozens of missed calls from his brothers, and a bunch of threats from Lucifer in the form of voicemails and texts. He doesn’t care, he’s used to this. It’s not the first time he’s overslept.

He scrolls through all his messages, stopping when he sees MC’s name. 

“Hope you’re doing okay,” he reads the texts out loud to himself, “Can we talk after school?”

He sends them a quick, “yes of course” before going back to sleep. The day’s half way over anyway, no point in showing up now.

Thankfully, MC gets home first, so they get to speak before whatever Lucifer’s punishment for Belphie will be. 

They find him still in the attic, a little bit of drool collecting on the cow print pillow as he snored. MC sat on the bed, lightly putting a hand on his shoulder. He opens one eye to look at them before turning pink and sitting up, wiping the saliva from his mouth and turning the pillow over.

“MC.”

“Where were you today? Lucifer’s going to kill you, you know.”

Belphie chuckles. “He already locked me up for several months. Not much worse he can do to me.”

“Yet you still come up here to sleep.”

He shrugs. “Sometimes I need alone time.”

“Is that what you needed last night?”

“What do you mean?”

“I don’t want to do anything you’re uncomfortable with, Belphie, but last night...there’s no denying anymore that there’s something in between us.”

Belphie sighs, running a hand through his hair. “Look, MC, I very much wanted to continue last night.”

“But?”

“But we can’t.”

“Why not?”

“Because I feel guilty...every time I touch you, all I can think of is how I hurt you.”

MC shifts, obviously uncomfortable with him bringing up the time he killed them. “You said you’d never do it again, didn’t you?”

“Of course I wouldn’t.”

“Then I trust you. Why can’t you trust yourself? I like you, Belphie. Don’t you like me?”

“Yes, of course.”

MC leans forward, kissing him. “There’s no reason to feel guilty. Also, your brothers are at a meeting, so we have a little bit of time.”

“Time for what?”

MC grins, shoving their RAD jacket off and undoing their shirt buttons. “I mean, unless you don’t want to…”

Belphie runs his eyes up and down MC’s body, staring at their now bare chest. He still feels worried, but that is quickly thrown out as another part of him begs to take advantage of the alone time.

Ultimately, as the human continues to undress, that side wins. Belphie smirks, reaching out to pull the human down with him. They laugh as he lightly tosses them onto the mattress, trailing kisses down their chest, catching each nipple between his teeth. The human lets out a moan, running their hands through Belphie’s hair. He kisses back up to their neck, suckling as he trails a hand down to between their legs.

MC mirrors him, reaching down to undo his pants. Belphie kicks his pants off his legs, desperate to shed his clothing and feel the human’s touch. He wiggles out of his underwear, his already hard and waiting cock springing out. MC wastes no time wrapping their hand around it, gently pulling at him. 

Belphie finds MC’s mouth, moaning into it as they kiss each other. He opens an eye to look down at MC’s beautiful face, flushed, eyes shut. He quickly takes a peek down to MC’s hand on his dick, pumping it delicately yet quickly, sending pleasure throughout his entire body. And his own between MC’s legs, playing with the most sensitive part of them. 

Their moans, the feeling of their touch, it was all getting to Belphie. He hovers over them, and they open their eyes, looking up at him. He lines up with dick with their entrance and they nod, granting sweet, sweet permission. 

Belphie enters, swiftly yet gently. MC cries out in pleasure, and for a moment, Belphie is paranoid that he harmed them. But when he sees their naughty smile, he lets himself focus on the feeling of being inside them.

He pumps in and out of them, speeding up. Both of their moans get louder and louder, echoing through the attic. Belphie begins to use his hand on them as he fucks them, determined to get them to climax. He hurt MC so badly before, and all he wants now is to be the reason for their bliss.

MC calls out his name as they cum, tightening around his cock and starting his own orgasm, both of their juices joining together inside of MC. 

Belphie collapses on top of MC, holding them tightly, fighting back his emotions. “I’m sorry, MC, I’m so sorry.”

MC shushes him sweetly, stroking his head. “I know, Belphie.”

“I won’t hurt you ever again. I love you.”

“I love you too.”

The sound of the rest of the demons coming home pulls them apart. Belphie chuckles, wiping tears from his eyes. “Guess our time is up.”

MC smiles, kissing him back. “Don’t worry, Belph. We’re just getting started.”

#obey me #obey me shall we date #omswd #obey me belphie #obey me belphegor #obey me fanfiction #obey me headcanons #belphie x mc #belphegor x mc #obey me smut #obey me angst #obey me fluff

[blu-joons]

He Asks You Out At The End Of A Collaboration ~ Jeon Jungkook

The lights went down on the stage for the final time, the crowd of the arena erupted in applause as your song came to an end, you looked across at Jungkook who had a wide smile on his face, he was exhausted, as you were you, walking across to you to give you a hug.

For months the two of you had been travelling, performing your song on any stage that would have you, writing, producing, every aspect of the song had your names to it, and now the journey the song had been on was coming to an end.

You couldn’t quite believe how successful the song had been, the two of you had worked so hard, as idols, you had a duty to make sure you only realised the best content.

“Thank you so much,” he whispered into your ear as he squeezed you tightly, “this has been one of the best experiences of my life, doing something just as Jungkook.”

“I have to thank you,” you smiled in response, “you’ve been incredible to work with.”

His hand slipped into yours, walking off of the stage where the boys were all waiting for you to congratulate the both of you on a great performance, through it all they had been your six biggest supporters, cheering for you at every stage.

Each of them pulled you into a tight hug before you were ushered back to your seat where the artists attached to your label sat. Jungkook waved lightly as you walked away, taking his seat next to Taehyung again.

“Just ask her out,” he whispered into his ear instantly, “don’t miss out on her.”

Jungkook glared across at him, “you don’t know what you’re talking about.”

All the boys had seen it, the look you had in your eyes, but more importantly the look he had in his, they could tell from day one that he was falling for you.

Taehyung held onto his arm, keeping his eyes looking across at him. “You’ve worked too hard on this song together to let everything the two of you have built up to fall apart. After tonight it could be a long time before you have anything to do with Y/N, don’t let it be that way, if you don’t want it to be.”

“She won’t want anything to do with me, she’s got her own focuses to move onto now that the promotion of the song is done, I don’t want to hold her back when she’s got so many good things coming for her.”

Taehyung’s head shook, “would Y/N see it that way, or do you think she’d want you to ask her out on a date instead?”

“I don’t know,” he muttered in response.

“I say just go for it.”

“You know, maybe I might,” he sighed, turning back to face you, “she’s great.”

“Don’t let her slip away then,” Taehyung insisted, glancing back as Jungkook did. “I can see how excited she makes you, none of us have ever seen you this way.”

He nodded, standing up from his seat in the arena, “I’m going to go over before I change my mind again.”

“That’s the right thing to do.”

He took a deep breath in and out, straightening his suit out so that he looked his best. He looked down to Taehyung who gave him a quick thumbs up, encouraging him more than anyone to walk over and speak to you before he regretted it.

You smiled when you saw him approaching you, it was rare for anyone to come to where your label was, not many people knew about your label and the artists that were in it. You stood up to greet him, wondering what was going on.

“Can we talk?” He asked, pulling you across to the zone of the arena where all the artists were able to mingle, feeling the boys’ eyes staring at him.

You weren’t quite sure what was going on, the confidence that Jungkook had before and after the song had disappeared, for once you saw a sign of weakness in him that you’d never been exposed to. You grinned trying to comfort him, but that made no difference to how quickly his heart was pounding in his chest.

“I’m really nervous so just give me the benefit of the doubt,” he chuckled, standing in front of you with his hands loosely holding onto yours.

“You’ve got nothing to be nervous about around me.”

“That might not be so sure soon,” he whispered, looking away from you.

You looked at him with a puzzled expression trying to figure out what was going on, you were here for the ceremony not to try and figure out what was wrong with him.

“There’s been something that I wanted to talk about.”

The smile that you looked at him with only made things worse, he struggled to hide his smile and excitement when he was around you, there was something about you that he’d never found before that just sent him crazy, he didn’t recognise himself whenever you were around.

“Jungkook, just talk to me, you know whatever it is I want to help you, you’re my friend.”

His head nodded slowly, “that’s the thing, I’m your friend, but I’ve wanted for a long time to be more than your friend,” he told you, tentatively looking across at you, “I don’t want to see you leave my life now that the promotion is over.”

“That would never have been the case Kook.”

You were so grateful to have him and to have had the opportunity to have his wisdom with the song, you never imagined that someone as popular as Jungkook would help out someone lesser known than you, but he was more than willing to, always.

“Jungkook, if this is your way of asking me out on a date, I’d love to, and if it’s not, I’m going to walk away now, because I’ve just humiliated myself,” you chuckled, turning to walk away but he was quick to pull you back, nodding his head to you.

“It was my stupid way of asking you out on a date.”

“That’s a relief then,” you spoke, both of you giggling, “I’ve loved working with you, and I never want it to end.”

“I feel the same.”

Around you it felt like the whole arena was empty, both of your eyes met, the only sound you could hear was the sounds of his heavy breaths as he tried to keep himself composed, one day he’d be able to put his finger on what you did to him.

His fingers intertwined with yours, “I’m so glad that I don’t have to leave you.”

“I would never have let you,” you smirked, “I wouldn’t have let you forget about me.” “I wouldn’t want to.”

He stepped forwards, wrapping his arms around your waist, resting your head against his chest, lingering his lips against your cheeks. You looked beautiful tonight, and the performance on the stage was the perfect ending to what had been the most extraordinary journey.

“The boys are going to be so proud that I asked you out too,” he chuckled, watching your smile grow in surprise.

“I thought they’d have something to do with this.”

“I was too scared without their help, I’m just glad they pushed me to do it. Now, I can go on a date with the girl of my dreams.”

“Who’s she then?” You teased.

“You, obviously!”

---

Masterlist

#bts #bts imagine #jungkook imagine #jeon jungkook #jungkook #bts reaction #bts scenario #kpop #bangtan #bts drabble #bts fluff #kpop imagine #bts one shot #jungkook one shot #jeon jungkook imagine #jungkook drabble #jungkook fluff

[taecalikook]

The Platinum Rules

summary : Being a true fuckboy he truly is, Taehyung only has three rules when dealing with his one night stands. One, never ever wine and dine someone before sleeping with them. Two, never ever stay the night after one night stands. Last one, is never, never ever meet a girl’s parents under any, any circumstance ever. These are his Platinum Rule, the one never break even once and it conveniently keeps him off the hook for anything. But what magic are you playing to have the fuckboy break all his rules for you in a span of only 24 hours?

{fake relationship! au, fuckboy! au, fratboy! au}

pairing : kim taehyung x reader 

word counter : 24.556

A.N = Read (Not) Just Friends here! Please be mindful this is in Lia’s perspective in (Not) Just Friends!

================================

“You did not just… You know what? Fuck you, Jeon Jungkook!”

Jungkook snickers, looking at the panicked face of his best friend, Taehyung when he sees he is not the only one in the table. Taehyung should have guessed, though. Since when did Jungkook ever ask for a dinner together other than McDonald and its peers? He thought Jungkook was being nice, wine and dining him for somehow ignoring their best friendship ever since getting himself a new girlfriend. Not that he is unhappy for Jungkook and he’d rather chop off his finger than to admit this, but he misses partying night in and out with him—he is just that whipped for his new girlfriend and decides to take himself off that routinity.

“I only say she is cute once. Once! And I don’t see any reason why you, your girlfriend and Y/N should be having dinner in this fancy ass place! This is a lowkey double date, do you know that?” Taehyung hisses in agitation.

“It doesn’t have to be! No one saying this is a double date beside you.” Jungkook amusedly chuckles, raising both his palm in defeat. “We are just going to have a nice dinner together, bro. As friends.”

Taehyung throws him an annoyed look. “You really going to fucking act like I don’t know you?! You are setting me up with this girl, I knew it! Jungkook, I told you, I am not interested in dating! I know it’s good for you, but I am not chaining myself to that time bomb, thanks.”

“Yeah, yeah whatever. But we are taking too much time in the toilet for two men and people there gonna think we are fucking. Let’s go.” Jungkook mindlessly put an arm on Taehyung’s shoulder, walking back to the desk in which his girlfriend and you are chatting lively. Taehyung takes a deep breath, then launches an elbow kick square to Jungkook’s rib that throws him to coughing fit to get his arms off him.

“I swear when we are done, I’ll punch you in your fucking annoying handsome face.”

Jungkook launches a flirty wink along with a chuckle. “I don’t mind you hitting on me, but my girlfriend is just right here.”

“Hey, you guys. What is taking so long in there?” Jungkook’s girlfriend cheerfully asks and both of the men shake their heads with an awkward smile. God, Taehyung really wants to snap to his own head right now, how he wishes to be anywhere but here. There is actually a party in the female frat he is greatly acquainted with. Should have just gone there to relieve some tense instead.

“They’re probably fucking.” You instinctively murmur, unknowingly too loud and audible to anywhere in the radius of a meter while calmly sipping on the glass of red wine. Your best friend slash roommate gasps, slapping your shoulder—somehow embarrassed.

“Y/N!”

Taehyung glances at the girl pouting in front of him, somehow finding her ironic jokes entertaining. Well, even though he is greatly opposed to the idea of a double date, but hanging out with this girl is probably not the worst idea. Probably beats hanging out alone with Jungkook while he is playing fucking Overwatch. 

Well, it goes back to a month ago when Jungkook finally got his shit together and confessed—ugh, the mutual pining seriously sickens him. Even if Taehyung is glad for Jungkook, he is uncertain how he can even settle down after living his greatest life. Man, Jungkook was on the top of the world—good athletic career, good body, beautiful girls—but now that he is settling down, and it kinda makes him uncool in a way. Probably because now he has a girlfriend, he is not really active in all the jock and frat activities like he used to. Girls are already done chasing him, not with that love-sick puppy eyes he has whenever his girlfriend is near—or even far and even with only a month, Taehyung quite had enough. In conclusion, relationships sucks and it changes people, and Taehyung doesn’t want to let go of the great life he is having right now just for settling for one girl. Why only one when he can have more, right?

Then when both Jungkook and Taehyung were hanging out, one night in their shared room, he mistakenly mentioned that you were cute. And he did not lie—he still doesn’t—but it didn’t mean anything! He mentioned dogs are cute probably even a thousand times, but he doesn’t see Jungkook getting him a dog. What’s the difference with saying you were cute? Jungkook is a literal dumbass for even thinking Taehyung can settle for a relationship.

The night goes on, and Taehyung finds himself counting the awkward jokes that have been thrown by Jungkook and his girlfriend about this being a double date and what a great match he is with you. He is literally keeping a tab of everything—waiting for all to be finished so he can finally get the long-awaited revenge he has been counting seconds for. But not that he will say it with his own tongue, he does think that you are cool—as a person. If these pair of idiot gooses are not here, he somehow thinks both of you might actually hit it off—as a good friend, of course.

“God, this is such a great dinner, right?” Your roommate yells, looking mildly buzzed with alcohol. You side-eye her and sigh, resting your glass of wine back. One thing about your best friend is she favors red wine a little too much, and sipping on the beverage like there is no tomorrow. Jungkook holds her hand across the table, eyes filled with adoration. 

“Are you okay, pumpkin? You look drunk.” Jungkook coos with a warm smile, and she smiles back, a wide smile painted on her lips. Taehyung literally feels the urge to puke just listening to the affection lacing in his tone. God, love really changes Jungkook.

“You know what? I love you, Jungkookie!” She suddenly stands up, crashes into Jungkook’s arm, gives him a haste kiss on the lips, right before walking drunkenly outside. Her surprised boyfriend swiftly chases her away, before signaling Taehyung to pay for their dinner. Taehyung is baffled on the side. Jungkook that bastard seriously invited him for this horrendous dinner, yet still asking him to pay? Fucker! But as he notices your eyes prodding his way, he quickly puts on a composed face, giving you a thin smile.

“I think that concludes this very, very confusing but yet pleasant dinner.” Taehyung smiles, while asking for the bill. “I am sorry if you are forced into this dinner. This new couple think they got the right to play immortal on us, right?” He cynically jokes and laughs at it, but your face is too straight to respond so his chuckle is slowing to a complete stop.

“I’m actually the one asking for this double date.” You whisper, an unexplainable emotion rushing on your tone. “I’m the one saying I want her to set us up so we can be together. I like you. I want to be with you, Taehyung. Forever. You—you want this too, right?”

The fear on Taehyung’s chest is instantly risen, seeing the crazy, psychopathic look in your eyes. Well he really thought you are not the type to stick up only after a dinner—but he cannot deny his instinct does disappoint him way too much than he could even be proud of. The instant urge to leave the spot and escape is too much with his feet are already out the table until you break it with a loud, hearty chuckle. “God! Messing with fuckboys is soooo fun! I can’t believe you fall for that!” 

Taehyung scrunch his eyebrow, detecting the unexpected jubilant look on your face. He is  bewildered.

Seeing that Taehyung still is not getting your very, very obvious joke, you sigh. Dumbass fuckboy. His cocky ass big head does not surprise you even a little. “God, I was kidding! Sorry to break it to you—it may be too hard to understand, but not every girl will be willing to take turns sucking your dick, dude. Sorry, life be like that.” You sarcastically note, setting your napkin on the table and Taehyung feels somehow relaxed and offended at the same time. Weird emotions, really. 

“I don’t even know why I am here.” You continue, displaying a friendly smile now, reaching out for your glass of wine. “Should have known. I fell for this fake dinner thing too many times now, gonna reject every dinner invitation from now on.”

Taehyung grins, finally able to breathe easily. Well, he deals with way too many obsessive and stuck up one night stands now that it even terrifies him to be around them, so that’s that. You are too cool to be like one of them, he just knew it.

“Gotta make an exception for me, though.” Taehyung cheekily musters, suddenly surging a confidence on his own skin. You are already dominating the conversation too long now, he just had to take over. “How else can I get to know you better, huh?”

Being a true fuckboy he really is, Taehyung only has three rules when dealing with one night stands. One, never ever wine and dine someone before sleeping with them, as dinner is a very, very intimate thing that involves a lot of real talks—instead of dirty talks in which he is way, way better on. Two, never ever stay the night after one night stands, as sunshine is just a sign that he has spent more than necessary time with her and can only result in any bothersome attachment after. Last one, and probably the rule that has no exception whatsoever, is never, never ever meet a girl’s relatives under any, any circumstance ever. The three rules are all based on his experience learning it the hard way, and ever since, he never broke even a rule and it greatly keeps him off the hook for anything. 

But albeit important, he will let himself break his first rule for you. Only because you are hot—and probably is included in the one percent population of girls who doesn’t need to be reminded that he is not looking for anything but a short fun. A lot of girls tend to forget that easily, getting to attached to what a gentleman he is before and during sex, and always become such a bother after. But he’ll trust this one that you’re not that kind of girl. Even with a bruise on his pride, since he is slightly doubtful if you’ll even agree to his proposal for hooking up tonight. At least, teasing you is already a great enough entertainment for him.

“Boy, I don’t want to know who that can actually work with, but I’m not that difficult to get to bed with.” You chuckle at his pathetic attempt to work his way inside your skirt. Taehyung raises his eyebrow, not believing his own hearing. You are glancing down now—probably to the phone on your lap and your face instantly contorts, and a sigh of tiredness escapes your lips. “I’m way too tired now anyway, better just go back home, fuck and get it over with.”

“W-what? You seriously want to fuck, willingly with me just like that?”

You give his shoulder a pity pat, a thin smirk on your lips. “God, Taehyung, do you actually need to work that hard to get laid all these time?”

“B-but, you just said every girl—”

“I changed my mind.” You sigh, getting tired of the constant queries, along with the message you just received. Jackasses, seriously. “Taehyung, I’m tired. Let's go pay and head back to my apartment. I think the cringy couple will not be there, but fuck them, let them hear us fucking so loud they need to follow as well.”

Taehyung cannot even believe the crude answer coming out from such beautiful, innocent lips, yet the intense anticipation of what’s about to come his way is too unbearable he could not wait even a second to get you under him and win his dominance back. At the cashier, Taehyung quickly slaps a card on the table with his foot swiftly tapping on the floor in impatience. You can’t help but to find that strangely adorable, yet disgusting at the same time. You are seriously hooking up with the worst fuckboy in your university. Never thought you'd stoop this low, but that’s life, right? Let’s see if he can put his money where his mouth is.

Seeing that Taehyung does not show any sign of asking your part of the bill, you are quick to remind him. “Taehyung, I will pay you back, okay? I’ll transfer it.”

“What? There’s no need for that, honey.” Taehyung whispers smoothly, putting in his pin with a wink. “It’s just a small thing I can do for a beautiful lady such as you.’

You snort at his cringy remark, greatly bothered by his every word. “Taehyung, seriously, stop. Any effort you have to do just to get laid will make everything worse.” Taehyung smiles to himself, somehow expecting the snarky remarks even before he threw the stupid comment. You are surely one of a kind. “And I’ll pay you back. This is not a date, and I’m not a prostitute, you don’t have to pay for me.”

The unexpected aggression and anger coming from you quite blow him off his edge, as you thomp furiously to exit the restaurant. Are you seriously saying that you are bothered by him willing to pay for dinner? Taehyung is all down for feminism, but he was literally just being nice—and beside, Jungkook is literally going to stab him with a fork if he ever lets you pay, so that’s that. 

But one realization comes to his mind—he is not going to deal with you long enough to think about your weird trait again. Tonight, all he needs to do is suck everything—and he means, everything. And when he leaves before midnight, then all will be just fine.

*

It’s weird.

Taehyung slowly flutters open his eyes, oddly feeling ten times better than he has been recently after waking up. He doesn’t even know why—probably the wonderful scent of vanilla and citrus that is vivid on his smell. But wait—what the fuck? That’s probably the one of the furthest things he will ever wake up to! He should be waking up annoyed by strong scent of sweat and cheap male perfume, not this.

Fuck, fuck! That ceiling—the light blue ceiling with countless translucent fake stars, that’s not his ceiling either. He was supposed to be looking at a cringy, old poster of Metallica on his dorm room ceiling. And this excessively comfortable, dark blue fur blanket hugging his waist, that’s most absolutely not his. And god, who the damn is he holding right now?!

“What the fuck! Why are you still here?!”

Well that is literally the words he had on his mind just a second ago, yet surprisingly it is not him who is yelling. It is a girl he had a nice dinner with yesterday—with red wine and everything. The girl who was too prideful to let him pay, and the girl who strangely manages to throw him off his game with their continuous three rounds of dirty, dirty sex and God, he swears he never cum harder before in his life—and it says a lot because he does lots of sex. Like a lot. Yup, it’s you.

God, he shouldn’t be here, he should just head home right after sex. He broke his second rule, right after breaking his first one last night, even worsewith the same girl—you. What the fuck is wrong with himself?!

“You said you would leave after a ten minutes nap!” You hiss, clearly disliking the fact that you have to wake up seeing his annoyingly handsome face—with bed hair mussed deliciously and all. Is it weird that you are feeling terribly ugly right now with him still looking like a handsome sex god on your bed? And still feeling his arm around your wait, you groan in disgust. “And why the fuck are you holding me?! Seriously, you are the worst one night stand ever.”

Taehyung quickly detaches himself off you like you are a disease, yet no offense taken since you are glad he is finally a distance away. “I was fucking tired after fucking three rounds yesterday, I think I fell asleep longer than I thought.” You roll your eyes since all you hear is bullshit. “And for your information, I always sleep hugging my bolster. And since you are fucking weird and do not have a bolster, I guess I just settle for less.” He reasons, but you respond with a snort.

“And the worst one night stand ever—are you kidding me? Funny I don’t recall you saying that last night when I generously let you cum in my tongue.” Taehyung continues with a smug, and you can’t help but to feel heated at the memory of last night, Taehyung finally used his mouth for a better cause for once—since you despise it when he is talking. Yet there is no use denying that Taehyung is indeed a master with his tongue, but of course you’d rather cut your arm rather than admitting it to his cocky ass face.

“Pssh—like you weren’t begging to have a taste.” You sinisterly defend yourself and Taehyung chuckles, vaguely shrugging as an answer. You involuntarily stare at his smiling face, and you have to admit he does look his best with it.  God, are you seriously thinking such domestic thoughts with this fuckboy right now? The alcohol must still have an effect on you.

“Why are you staring at me? Finally realize that you should have just jumped on my bone again instead of doing this strange, pillow talk?” Taehyung impishly grins so you land a strong punch on his bare chest with all your might. He lets out a definite cough, definitely not expecting the strength coming out from such a small frame like yours. “Damn woman, what exactly are you?!”

“A girl that can definitely kick your naked ass out of her apartment if you don’t leave in five.” You solemnly warn. Taehyung let out a light laugh, shuffling out of your blanket with no shame whatsoever with his straight out of womb nakedness to grab his clothes. And you cannot bear to notice how apparent his morning wood is—and it brings pleasant yet unnecessary memories of last night to your mind. You seriously need to get a hold of yourself cause if not, you might have to play with yourself after and you don’t really want to get off with the thought of him for the fourth time now. “For the love of God, Taehyung! Put some clothes on!”

Taehyung is unimpressed, pointing at his clothes like it’s the most obvious thing. “What are you—yes, I’m doing it right now, you idiot. And I’m using your bathroom first, I don’t want to look like a fucking idiot, walking around the campus with a morning hard on.” He pouts, but then a smirk formed on his lips. “Or you want to lend a hand with this?”

You shut him with a pillow thrown to his annoying, smug face. “The fuck no. And what, no you can’t!” You answer in panic, pointing to your door. “We only have a shared bathroom here. Let me check if my roommate is out.”

Taehyung sighs. “Y/N, you literally told me last night to fuck as loud as we can and let them hear so they can follow.” Listening to him quoting you from last night, you internally wince. You literally don’t have any trace of ever saying that in your vague memory. God, you must had been drunker than you thought.

“That’s just the drunk and horny talking.” You hiss, trying to steal a peek through the door. There is no sign of your roommate, so everything should be good to go. Or at least you think so. “The cocky ass new couple will be all over our asses, Tae. They will think something is up, try setting us up like yesterday. Ugh, no thanks. You have to leave without anyone knowing.”

“Hate to say you are kinda correct in that one, buddy.” Taehyung sighs. He literally said he was going to punch Jungkook for arranging the dinner, yet now he was the one taking advantage of it. He would not let Jungkook win on that one—he still desperately needs that one punch chance or that fuckers will never let it slip ever, even until the day he is well rested and buried. “Okay, is she out now? Jungkook is not there, right?”

Like a cue of bad luck, your roommate and Jungkook walk out of her room, hand in hand with each other right to sit on the sofa. Jungkook kisses the tip of her head, caressing the side of her face while scrolling through netflix on the tv. “I can’t believe we are watching Taken for the hundred times already just so you can fulfill your Liam Neeson odd kink.” Jungkook impassively huffs.

“God, Liam Neeson kink? Your roommate is fucking weird.” Taehyung lowly whispers, all of a sudden already squatting beside you. You jump a few steps back due to the shock of seeing his face up close, clutching your chest dramatically.

“Damn, can you stop shocking me?!”

Taehyung greasily winks. “Baby, I don’t think anything should shock you after seeing my dick in all its glory.”

You fold your chest, slightly amused but majorly annoyed by his unending arrogance. “Ugh, don’t baby me. And well, I am still shocked probably because I don’t think your dick is outstanding whatsoever.”

Taehyung ignores your stubborn, obviously a lie remark, and continues peeking from the door crack. “God, a film. Probably take them one or two hours. But I think Jungkook has practice in… one and a half hours, so maybe I can go by then.”

Your frown turns deeper, dreading the imagination of spending another hour with him, locked in your 3x5 meters room. Are you even capable of holding yourself from strangling off his cocky, annoying head? This could probably be the greatest challenge you will ever have to face. 

“What should we do for an hour and a half….” Taehyung whispers to himself, sends you a suggestive look while wiggling his eyebrows. You quickly send him your middle finger as an answer, already rejecting whatever idea he has since you are well aware there is no possibility you will like it.

“I am not suggesting to fuck, sorry if you were expecting that.” Taehyung lopsidedly smirks, and you fold your arm in agitation. God, you wish everything can be over so you can go to your parents home and call it a week. And it’s saying a lot since you never look forward to going back home every weekend. “I won’t refuse, but I just want to play now. Do you play animal crossing?”

“Seriously?! You play too?!” You are surprised to say the least, voice unforeseen raising in delight. You really do not expect a fuckboy like Taehyung would play a game like animal crossing—you thought he would hold on to that toxic masculinity and play whatever popular ‘boy’ games right now. It is strangely a nice surprise. “Can I visit your island? Let’s trade too! I have bamboo shoot lamp, log dining table—”

Taehyung chuckles, seeing how passionate you are, scrambling to get your nintendo from your night desk and turning it on while blabbering non stop about your items. He strangely finds it endearing, how drastic you can be when you are not trying to kick him out with a torch and pitchfork and it only takes a freaking animal crossing game. You are tremendously unpredictable, and he finds himself liking the refreshing change of pace. He walks back to your bed, sitting beside you while you animatedly chatter about your island.

Is it too wistful to wish that the current strange yet greatly amusing thing going for the both of you does not have to end now?

*

After being firsthand kicked out from your apartment when Jungkook went to his practice, Taehyung walks to the basement to get to his car in a strange mood. It’s Saturday, yet he doesn’t know what to do or where to go. There is another frat party that will be held tonight, yet he finds himself less than excited to go. He loves parties, but he is not delusional to think that he will love it forever—he is already in a phase of finding parties are monotonous and boring most times. Yet going home is not really a convenient option since there is no use—it’s empty anyway. Frankly, he doesn’t even know what home to him really is. Is it his dorm? Is it the party? Yet they probably give him a better definition of home rather than his own real house.

So Taehyung decides to drive his car back to his apartment on the other side of the town, far from his parents house. The upside of being a child of divorce is probably being shoved money to his mouth like it's the only thing that matters—yet he doesn’t mind. Or maybe he does, but there is no use in complaining, right? He is 21 now, he is over that complaining, depressed phase of his life. Maybe take a couple of depressants tonight, cry a little to sleep and he should be fine. Or maybe he’ll schedule a session with his psychiatrist—he has been missing lots of sessions and it may or may not has taken a toll on him already.

After arriving his car inside the apartment building, Taehyung sighes on his seat, a great exhaustion painted on his face—and he literally is. Just a few hours ago he was able to momentarily forget every issue in his life, but after he is alone, the anguish of loneliness hits him like a ton of brick. He is alone. He is nobody. Nobody likes him, even his own parents. He is just an emotionless shithead who is not right in the head. Who is he to think that he is worthy? Nothing in his life he achieves with his own hands, and life is just a constant train of problems and disappointment. It will never go the other way, since happiness is not for him.

Taehyung rests his head on the wheels, shutting his eyes tight to handle the tears coercing to rain out. No! He doesn’t want to cry now! Even then the ugly tears won’t stop coming out, and he tries to find purchase by hitting his head on the wheel. He enjoys the pain. The pain he is feeling right now—it never felt so right before.

Right until someone knocks on his window, simultaneously stopping his current emotional breakdown. He looks up—probably looking like an ugly, crying mess, expecting the security with an disapproving look on his face for the nth time. But instead he finds someone that instantly melts his whole being—somehow successfully distracting him from the intrusive thoughts he was having.

“Taehyung, are you okay? Hey come out, you have been there for awhile now.”

Taehyung quickly sweeps his tears with his sleeve, fixing the hairs on his forehead to conceal the bruise that might be formed from hitting it multiple times to the wheel and look down. God, this is embarrassing! He never thought he would meet her again in this situation—it seems like life is playing games on him and he despises it for her to always find him in such a ridiculous situation.

“Mina, hi.” Taehyung stutters nervously, somehow avoiding his neighbor prodding eyes that always sends him to nervous bundles. “I—I don’t know you’re home.”

“What are you saying, I’m always home.” Mina chuckles, pointing at the paper bag filled with groceries. “Just came back from grocery shopping. I am cooking pasta today. You wanna join?”

Taehyung looks at her sincere eyes, silently thankful that she is not going to mention his previous breakdown—not that she ever does. Whenever she witnesses his breakdown; crying in his car, hearing screams when he feels suffocated, things being thrown away, and even that one time he brought his one night stands back to his apartment and the girl runs out crying due to his unpleasant way of shooing her away; Mina never judges. She would come knocking at his door, asking him to join her watching the TV, or eating the less than edible food she cooks herself. It’s always a great time with her, and Taehyung could not lie that he feels greatly comfortable with her presence.

“I would love to. Kinda unsure if I won’t get a digestion issue after eating it, though—but i’ll take my chances.” Taehyung smirk cheekily. The girl scowls, shoves him away with her free hand, and strides inside the apartment lobby without waiting for him. Taehyung warmly smiles, quickly walks to her side to walk to their neighboring apartment. “Here, let me take that for you.” Taehyung instinctively grabs the load off her arm. Mina smiles, pressing the lift button to their apartment level.

“It’s been such a long time since your last visit, Tae.” She is staring intently on the man beside her. It was too much for Taehyung, causing his heart pounding faster than normal. He bit his lips, looking anywhere else but her.

“I missed you.” She whispers.

That is it. The word he longs and needed to hear the most—ironically not only from her, but from everyone. And now Mina is saying it to her, Taehyung feels like he is about to cry from the overwhelming emotion. Oh, how he wishes he could say the reason behind his absence. But no, he has to be strong, at least this once. So he forces a thin smile, and tries to change the topic to anything else.

After five minutes full of small talks and keeping up with each other’s lives, Taehyung and Mina finally arrive in front of her apartment door. She shuffles on her purse. “Wait, I’m grabbing my keys.”

“No shit sherlock.”

Right when she swings open the door, someone is already waiting inside, waiting on the couch while watching Pororo. “Mama!” She squeals in delight, running to Mina’s grasp with her two ponytails waving through the air, then clutching onto her for dear life. “And Taehyung oppa is here too!” She shouts in delight, changing her target now to Taehyung for a hug. Mina instinctively retrieves the paper bag from him so he scoops the little girl and holds her close. 

“Oppa, I miss you so much! I haven’t seen you since forever!” The five years old pouts, lightly hitting his chest with her cute, little fist. Taehyung quickly gives her a kiss on the cheek—oh, how he adores the little girl in his arms now. 

“Sorry, oppa is busy. But it’s okay since he is here now!” He smiles, trying to lighten up her mood. She is the whole reason that Taehyung is here in the first place—the little gremlin he loves so much, probably even more than himself. She is Yuna, Mina’s daughter.

Mina is two years older than Taehyung, and she was married three years ago to a man with a daughter. The man is away most of the time for his job offshore, and is back every three to six months. When Taehyung bought the apartment they were already living there—the first neighbor that welcomes him warmly regardless of how unwelcoming he was, as he hated socializing with new people. But they never exchange anything beside a short, civil smile until one day.

Everything changed on the day Taehyung was about to head for class, he found an unannounced guest standing by his door—a four-years-old Yuna, unknowingly went out while her stepmother was sleeping. Yuna was lost, crying out loud because she couldn't get back inside. Taehyung was well aware of the identity of the toddler, so he instantly knocked on his neighbor's door while holding Yuna’s petite hand on his side. 

After finding the fact that her daughter was put in danger by her own carelessness, Mina cried, feeling totally remorseful for forgetting to lock the door. She mentioned she was so exhausted, finishing all night for her upcoming book and having to clean Yuna and the house after. Later that night she invited Taehyung for a thank you dinner, which did not really go well since she couldn’t cook for shit—but still insisting to. Yet even with an upset stomach, Taehyung never felt as comfortable as when he was having dinner with her. At that time, he was severely lonely and needed a friend. That’s how it began—he would always knock on her door, and she always welcomed him with open arms. He got addicted to hanging around Mina and her beautiful daughter.

Yet it was a very foolish thing to even let himself believe hanging around nearly every single day around a married woman is harmless—because he was and still is an idiot and somehow, against all odds and his own cynical thoughts, he caught feelings. Bad. But how could he not? Mina was probably the kindest, the most beautiful soul he has ever met. She always knows the right thing to say at the right time, and being around her always makes him feel hundred times better. She sees the real him, instead of the dumb, rich and messed up fuckboy everyone sees him nearly everywhere. Like seeing her and talking to her—he could finally breathe after holding it for the longest time. 

But it was not long until every illusion Taehyung had fell through. Mina’s husband came back home from his three months offshore work and that's exactly when he faced a cold truth that nothing was ever going to work out anymore. Mina is married to a very kind man as well, and Taehyung would never go against his sanity and ruin it—especially when he knew who would be the most affected by it. It’s Yuna, the most wonderful child who has frankly gone through a lot after her birth mother passed away a few years back from cancer. Taehyung is a child of divorce for god sake, he knew how painful it was for the child like the back of his hand. He would rather die than to be the one doing it to her. That’s the sole reason he has been avoiding Mina and Yuna at all cost. All because he wants to protect the two girls he adores so much.

“Oppa, I am still waiting to play the toy with you! Come play with me!” Yuna cries, promptly running inside her room to grab a few of her new toys. Taehyung easily complies, walking to the living room and detecting a bunch of very Yuna-typical toys—zombies. She always loved playing plants vs zombies on her device, so he bought her zombie and plants toys on her birthday two months ago, but never got to play them before with her. Yet when the large toy on her little grasp is close, Taehyung detects that it is still securely sealed.

“Yuna, you never played this before? Don’t you like it?” Taehyung is saddened at the fact that the girl never played with the toy he gave. But Yuna fervently shakes her head, comfortably sits on Taehyung’s lap like old times and leans on his chest. 

“I like it! But I want to play it with oppa first!” Yuna smiles widely, showing her missing front teeth and Taehyung is unable to hold his smile. The girl is literally the cutest girl ever to exist and he is willingly smitten into her cute charms. Taehyung pecks her cheek in fondness before helping her in opening the box of toys.

After a great forty minutes passed, Yuna is already exhausted, sleeping on Taehyung’s chest since she spends too much of her energy screaming, laughing while playing with her plants vs zombie toys and figurines. He leans on the sofa, caressing the top of the five year old head sleeping on his arms, gazing at her serene sleeping face. She looked very content and happy, and seeing her like this is therapeutic for him. 

“Taehyung, let me get her to her room. Let’s eat, the pasta is ready.” Mina whispers, and he nods, letting the woman take her child to her bedroom. Taehyung coughs, a strange feeling suddenly runs through his mind at how domestic all of these feels. God, he told himself a million times that this should not happen—he was trying his best to evade getting too attached with them to the point that he next to never comes back to his own apartment anymore—yet one accidental visit and he is now back at one. This is ridiculous!

Finding no other solution than trying to survive another thirty minutes without making a fool, or even derangedly hurting himself in the process, Taehyung takes a seat on the dining table with a decent looking pasta served on it. The hurried steps of Mina are heard and Taehyung quickly clears his throat. This is it, Taehyung. Just one lunch, and that’s all. You can finally go back to your apartment. 

“Let’s eat! I actually tried cooking this exact recipe before, and I know it tastes good. I’ve been practicing, you know.” Mina grimaces, remembering the time Taehyung vomited when her so-called scallops were badly cooked and his stomach was greatly upset, causing Taehyung to skip his classes for a full week. Seeing how nervous she is unknowingly brings a smile on his lips. “At least you won’t throw up this time, trust me.”

“I kinda doubt it, but let’s go.” Taehyung teases, while Mina scoops a portion to his plate. He nods gratefully, with the nerves gradually increasing. This annoying voice on his head keeps repeating the thing he is most afraid of, but he pushes it away and musters a thin smile. No. He’ll finish the lunch, run back to his apartment, and never come back for another four months. That’s better.

One habit whenever Taehyung is nervous is he always runs a finger through his hair. The said habit being done is pushing away the strands of hair on his forehead, exposing a palpable bruise which faintly bleeds due to the great force of knocking his forehead on the wheel during his latest breakdown in the car. Seeing how concerning the injury has looked with a smear of blood is evident on his forehead, Mina jumps on her seat in worry. “God—Tae! Your forehead, it bleeds!”

Yup, it is. Taehyung coherently snorts when touching the forehead with his palm, seeing a hint of blood on it. He is instantly aware of the pain. What a fucking idiot he is—god, when will he stop making a fool of himself?

“Wait, I’ll grab some meds, okay?”

Mina walks to one of the cabins, then returns with a box of first-aid kits to his side. She takes a seat beside him, pointing it so she can comfortably access the bleeding bruise on Taehyung’s forehead. One thing that she might be clueless about is how nervous Taehyung is, heart rate abnormally fast just by seeing her face in such close proximity—so close he can even spot the little mole on the side of her nose bridge—while the familiar, refreshing scent of lilac is radiating off her. She is tending his bruise carefully, her left fingers secured on his left jaw to keep him in place, and Taehyung's head literally spins. How can someone be this beautiful?

At one point, everything is too much to handle for Taehyung. He likes Mina, this beautiful, married woman that somehow gets him better than everyone, but he can never be with her. He could not let himself fall even deeper and do something he will most absolutely regret after. “Mina, stop. It’s—it’s enough.” He breathes lowly, abruptly losing his ability to speak, especially when her lips are just a breath away for him to touch. But he knows they were overstepping the boundary and desperately needs to stop. It’s not right.

Then at once, the confusion on Mina’s face turns into remorse and the next thing both of them know that their lips are touching, both eyes closed with Mina’s hands secured on each side of his shoulders. He is now kissing Mina.

Taehyung cannot lie that he did imagine about kissing her before. Yet at that time, the only thing he feels is disgust, ten times worse than he already feels for himself. Not even a second felt right—a flash of his broken family went through his mind. He just stopped to another level of low; he is kissing a married woman.

“Mina, stop! We cannot do this.” Taehyung gruffly pushes her away, quickly standing up with a heavy urge to vomit coming out from his stomach. It’s disgusting, he is disgusting. Not that he is miserable with himself, he just became a cause of someone else’s misery. He is really the bad guy in every story.

“I-i’m sorry. I’m sorry, Taehyung. I-i know it was wrong, I don’t know what has gotten into me—”

Taehyung is irritated beyond words, his face reddening while he furiously scrubs the remnants of the kiss on his lips with no holding back whatsoever. He is disgusted with himself, and frankly he is disgusted with Mina. He never should have come here. There’s literally nothing good will ever come out on meeting the married woman he somehow liked—and a realization is dawned on him. He just sinned Yuna. The innocent, five-years-old girl that deserves happiness more than anyone else in this whole world. It feels like he already hit rock bottom, like he just wanted to throw himself off a cliff.

“It is wrong!” Taehyung aggressively hisses, quickly walking to the living room to grab his belongings, yet finding the toys he just played with Yuna results in him feeling uncomfortably nauseous. This is the worst thing that could ever happen to him.“This, this never happened. It’s better for us to not see each other again.” He runs to the door with great fury, before a whimper of his name is heard. Mina is calling him.

Yet he is unable to walk away without seeing her one last time. Hearing her voice calling his name. Listening to what she is about to say.

“Taehyung, I’m sorry.”

*

After running away from the encounter with Mina, he called his super that he is selling the apartment right away. He has to close everything—every little chance of seeing Mina, and sadly even Yuna. Taehyung desperately needs some space, and so does her. It’s better not to see each other again. 

Hence, now he has nowhere to go. Going back to his dorm is not an option—he is currently at the lowest point of his life and seeing anyone from college is never a convenient option. So that night, Taehyung decides to spend the night in his car, parked on the side of Han River. It’s a place for him whenever he is sad. A place that always reminds him that he is still too scared to die. A place to remind him that somehow, he still yearns his life to go the other way. A better one.

And at one point, after bawling his eyes out, he is desperate to feel the wind slapping his face and knock some sense into him. He exits the car, taking his time to walk to the side of the river, hands secured inside his pocket. He closes his eyes, taking in the cold wind and feels it rushing through his face. The cold was definitely a tid bit much—probably to the point he couldn’t feel his face, but he somehow prefers it. 

But he is most absolutely unable to stand another minute clenching at the rail of the river, so he walks to the nearest bench, placed under a tree. It is more convenient—the wind is hundred times kinder and he can finally feel his face. And all of a sudden, his phone rings. He half-heartedly steals a glance, finding an unknown number. He easily rejects the call, before it rings once again. And again, and again until he annoyedly picks up just to shout his agitation to whoever is on the other side of the call.

“Is this—is this Taehyung?”

The familiar yet so strange voice welcomes him, and the anger on the tip of his tongue dissolves. But he is still uncertain of his hypotheses on the identity of the caller on the other side. “Yes. Who is this?”

“Hi, sorry, this is Y/N. I know we just met and I am not even your acquaintance or anything, but can I ask for your help this time? I swear I owe you one after, but please just help me with this one.” 

It’s Y/N. It’s seriously you on the other side, yet Taehyung could not believe his ears. Is his hearing deceiving him right now? You made it clear that seeing him again could be the second worst thing to happen to her—after a meteor suddenly falls and crashes on your favorite Mexican restaurant—but now you are calling him, not even a day after your last meeting? There must be something serious, and a bizarre worry immediately fills his head. “Y/N, what is it? What happened? Tell me.”

“I-I’m afraid I can’t tell you. But this is urgent, can you help me with this one? I promise I’ll pay the favor back, I swear.” 

Taehyung discards the light insulted feeling on how you mention you’ll pay him back like your life depends on it, and instead focuses on the urgency in your tone. You seem greatly rushed, worried and almost scared, and never would he ever imagine of saying no to that. “Of course, Y/N. What is it, I’ll try helping the best I can.”

“Can I ask where are you right now? I need to go somewhere really urgent, can you take me there?”

Taehyung looks warily around him. There’s only an old lady with her dogs just walking past him. He is quite far from the crowd. “I am in Han River now. Where are you? I can pick you up from there.”

“No need, I’m actually quite near. Can you send me your location?”

And that’s how Taehyung spends another 10 minutes, trying to make out your face amongst the people walking around him. While focusing on the people passing around, suddenly a cold hand slaps his shoulder and sends Taehyung on his toes, startled beyond words. “Fuck, Y/N! You can’t startle me like that!”

“I’m sorry, Taehyung.” You apologetically wince, holding the black duffle bag close to your chest. “I won’t startle you again. That if we ever meet again, which I don’t really hope to. Can we go now?”

Taehyung rolls his eyes at your warm words. “Just a thing everyone expects from the person who is just asking for help, right?”

You smile widely until your eyes turn into mooncreases, and Taehyung feels his throat stricken dry. “Let’s go, Taehyung. I’ll tell you the direction.”

And that’s how you are for the second time seated in Taehyung’s black Audi, with him smoothly driving it in accordance to your directions. You bite your lips in nerve, occasionally stealing a glance at Taehyung who is busy driving, looking around the streets with hesitation. Of course he would be, the direction you are giving must be unfamiliar for nearly everyone sane. “Hey. Can I ask you something?”

You don’t want Taehyung to question where you are heading right now—as he will instantly dump your ass on the street with no second question asked. “Yes?” You whisper faintly, crossing your fingers that it would be anything but that question.

“Can I turn on the music? Are you okay with that?”

The tense on your body crashes down with an exhale. “Of course. It’s your car, Taehyung, you can do anything with it.”

Taehyung snorts. “I am just being nice. I seriously think you might be a grinch for any kind of fun, the type to love creepy, dead silence while driving.”

“You are seriously a child.” You shake your head in disbelief, and Taehyung's lean forefinger taps the music button, connecting to his phone. “And god, you seriously got no other car, Taehyung? A less flashy one, I guess?”

Taehyung smiles proudly, patting the wheel with affection evident in his eyes. “No. Cecil is my baby, and I would never trade her for anything else.”

You groan at the foreign name. “Who the fuck is Cecil? God, don’t tell me you’re that creep who names dead stuff.”

“Hey! You don’t know how long and what kind of things Cecil has gone through with me.” Taehyung literally yells. He is one peculiar pea, but you are in no place to judge anyway. You are literally a nobody. “And you can’t tell me that, Cecil is the one who is helping your ass to wherever we are going right now.”

You decide not to prolong the abnormal debate you had with Taehyung, so you turn silent and point to the direction of your destination. When the car is heading to dark, narrower streets, Taehyung realizes they are already too far outside downtown, in a place where he knows he would never visit in any possible scenarios in his life ever. 

“Y/N, I know I am not supposed to ask anything, but this is getting creepy and I just need to know why the fuck are we in this creepy, suspicious place?” Taehyung hisses, noticing that everything is too dreadful to be true. He doesn’t even know this place to ever exist in Seoul—that’s if they are still in town. “Where are you taking me?! God, don’t tell me you are going to murder me, take Cecil with you and sell her away?! Please don’t do it, especially the last one!”

You sigh at his nonsense, frankly tired and majorly nervous since your destination is already near. You glance at the message displayed on your phone. He is already waiting. “God, Taehyung. We are just five minutes away, just drop me off anywhere and you can run off after.”

“What? No! What about you? How are you going home this late, and from this creepy ass place?!” Taehyung stares at you, and you can find a genuine worry in his eyes for your well being. God, you are speaking nonsense, since there is no way Taehyung can even have feelings for you other than lust, and that’s just fact.

“It’s okay, someone will take me home.” You doubtfully answer, wanting Taehyung to swallow your lies even if you are not so sure yourself. Somehow you doubt the man you are meeting now will have the heart to take you home after this. You can just grab a taxi or bus—if they are still available—after anyway, it should not be an issue, right? But even self pep talk does not change a thing, you are still scared beyond words. This neighborhood indeed terrifies you, especially at night. 

The car is now settled in front of the dark building that you identify as your destination. “Are you sure, Y/N?” Taehyung mindfully asks one more time with hesitation fills his gaze. At the persistence, you are slightly touched. “I don’t know what you are doing or who you are meeting there, I won’t ask. But I swear, I don’t mind waiting for you.”

You have a hard time believing—when was the last time someone cares for your safety like this? Life has been just a constant repetition of pushing anyone away from nearly half of the things going on with you, and to have someone you clearly is just using and still greatly show his concern is so strange. Maybe it’s time to admit that Taehyung is not just the heartless fuckboy you expect him to be. He may be more than that.

But no, you don’t need to involve him further inside the mess you are in, and he won’t be near long enough to stay so no need to get in such depth with him. And only god knows what would happen to an elegant, once in a lifetime seen black expensive Audi parked in this neighborhood. “Taehyung, no. I’ll get home safe, I swear.”

Taehyung does not want to push his agenda, even if he is still unable to turn off the alarms at the back of his head. “Sure, if that’s what you want. At the very least please let me know when you arrive, or if anything happens, okay?”

You nod, not really sure what to reply to his untypical concern. But then the annoying Taehyung is back as he mutters the next reply. “Or don’t. I just realized I left my charge somewhere and my battery is dying, probably not gonna see them till the next two days.”

“You are fucking annoying.” You spit with a sarcastic smile and Taehyung chuckles lightly, lightening up the mood. “See you, Tae. And thank you for taking me, I owe you one.”

You walk inside, finding Taehyung’s Audi is still parked there. Seeing how he vaguely gets caught inside your mess, and you feel apologetic. You huff, braving youself to knock on the door, then find a man that has been blowing up your message for a while now. He holds you close, taking you inside the house with odd affection. “Baby, who is that with a black, expensive car? Is that your new boyfriend?” 

You look at him, trying to keep your composure straight. You really do not want this despicable man in front of you to get any strange idea whatsoever about Taehyung. “He is not.” You adamantly hiss, pretending nonchalance. “He is here because you, somehow cannot pick me the fuck up. There is no uber or taxi that wants to get me here at this time of the night, and I swear to god you better get me home.”

That man pulls you closer, his lips closing on your side jaw and his arms circling your waist. All of a sudden, your resolve crumbles at his familiar touches. “I miss you, baby. And don’t worry about going home, you can stay the night here.”

His lips are swiftly grazing your sweet spot, right at your collarbone and you instinctively let out a moan of pleasure when he sucks on it like there is no tomorrow—to the point it will surely leave evident hickeys. God, he really knows you like the back of his hand and you have no idea whatsoever to do about it. Three years together is very evident now—he can read you effortlessly. 

“Stop it.. You know I’m staying at my parent’s tonight, I have to go home.” You let out a hushed whisper, a moan escapes your lips when his hands slowly stray from your shoulder, down to your waist and to the area that leaves you breathless. God, you are out of your mind for him.

“Fuck them. You know I really miss you, baby… I seriously need to be inside you right now. Don’t you miss me? Stay tonight.”

At his discourteous words at the mention of your parents, any illusion and lust at wanting to have in any way he wants dissolve into thin air. He is still the same old, disrespectful man that will never give a shit about you, especially your parents. But what exactly was the expectation you have for him? You are foolish to even think he will magically has understanding and common sense, since he is a monster.

But you are the one responsible for creating this monster…

The familiar guilt instantly fills your chest all at once, and it vividly constricts in pain. You push the black bag to his chest in a rush. “Here’s what you asked. I just did the best I can—don’t call me again. I have to go home.”

As you run to exit the building, you half-expect him to hold you back, apologize, or do anything that somehow might stop you from leaving into the unwelcoming, shady neighborhood, at nearly midnight, but nothing. The frustration that suffocates your chest is too much, and it is extremely hard to breathe. Your head spins with countless voices running inside your head, screaming incoherent words that somehow sends you into a great panic.

And you take a deep breath. Then the second. Then the third, trying to empty your mind from any intrusive thoughts that are doing you no good whatsoever. Right until you can finally close everything off, trying to pick your phone and get an uber—if it’s even possible. The reason you needed to get Taehyung help in the first place is that no uber or taxi would like to even come close to this place, and there’s thin to none chance you’ll ever get one. 

And you are correct, since it’s already five minutes in and there is no sign of your request ever finding a ride home tonight. You are in deep frustration for there is no hope whatsoever in getting back home. Your parents are away, but your grandma is home—you left your responsibility of taking care of her to meet that man. Your parents are going to kill you if they ever find out you are escaping home, especially to meet the man they hate the most in this whole world—the man who is greatly a bad influence on you, the man who made you hospitalized for months, the man who they recognize as your ex. 

But even with how far he is from ideal, he is still the same man who fought for you. The man who taught you love and sacrificed himself for you in no way anyone would. You don’t want to let him go—you are aware that he has strayed far, but he’ll come back soon. You held onto that for a long time, even with the faith you have on him is slightly dwindling. It’s been nearly three years since that accident, and you found that he is still the same, obnoxious man he was and even worse, yet you cannot let him go. Your conscience would never let you.

Feeling the remorse that is starting to overwhelm your senses, you notice there is literally waste in vain to think about that. You have to think for the present, how the fuck can you do to get home? Your parents might be home any time now, and they will never let the matter go until you are forced to confess that you are indeed, meeting your ex—the one person they loathe the most.

So you decide to run for your life to the nearest stop to take a bus or any available transportation, away from the shady neighborhood. You start with a fast stride, but you hear a sound of an engine booming behind you, slowly creeping on your side of the street. The red alarm on your head is loudly screaming. Someone is following you, and at once the worst memories of your life hits you like a truck. 

You abruptly fasten your pace, keep on running. But due to the nerves, your leg is close to giving up. You are exhausted beyond words, and the intrusive breakdown inside your head is not helping either. Just in five minutes you have no strength left and fall down on the pavements, your body trembling, tears crashing loudly as you hide your body inside your arms.

You never should have come to this place. You never should have come back to him. That time he loved you and cared so much about you was years ago, and he changed. He will no longer be there to rescue you. He doesn’t even give any shit about your safety. When will you ever be strong and stop whatever nonsense you are having for him?

“Hey, hey what happened, Y/N? Why are you crying?!” 

You are still bawling your eyes out like there is no tomorrow, your whole body trembling hard with both your legs secured on your chest. Someone is touching your arms, but you are too frightened by the imagination inside your head so you can do anything but to hold your legs even closer. “Please.. Please don’t hurt me..”

“Y/N, what are you—This is Taehyung. I have been calling you since you walked out, but you are not responding. Y/N, you are shaking so hard.. God, you’re scaring me. Please say something.”

After listening to the words that send you to a haze for having a hard time believing whatever it is, that man holds you close, his strong arms around your shoulder, his wide palm caressing your upper back slowly. “Take a breath, Y/N. You are panicking, but it’s okay. Take a deep breath. Everything is okay. I am here.”

At the constant calming ministration from Taehyung, along with his warm hug around your trembling, drenched with cold sweat body, you find the tense on your body is progressively decreasing to the point you can finally think and speak clearly without any more tears falling on the side of your cheek. You look up, finding Taehyung’s worried gaze seeking into yours.

“Why are you here, Tae? I thought you went back.”

Noticing how much you already get better from the panic attack, Taehyung can finally let go the breath he has been holding for quite a long time now. “I was about to, but—hey, I’ll tell you everything in the car. For now let’s go, you have been sitting on a pavement, who knows what germs you can catch from there.” Taehyung whispers with a vivid disgust on his tone. At that, you can finally smile. Albeit thin, Taehyung feels like he has achieved something remarkable. He quickly holds you up, arms secured around your waist to help you walk inside his car.

Taehyung opens the door for you, yet you are still hesitating to enter. “Get in, Y/N. I’ll take you home.”

“But.. your seat. What if my germs polluted your seat?” You are innocently concerned, and Taehyung can’t help but to chuckle. He did not expect such polite questions coming from you who just had a literal breakdown, yet he finds it endearing.

“It’s okay, Y/N. I’ll be taking Cecil to car service tomorrow as well, so it’s no issue. Get in.” 

Dubiously you step your left foot inside, before you gasp in surprise that shocks Taehyung as well. “I have a scarf! Let me sit on that.”

Taehyung follows your vigor on going through the small bag hanging on your shoulder with his eyes. “Not really necessary, but whatever. I’d prefer your shirt though. Can you sit on it instead?”

You snort. “Pervert.” He responds with a smirk, skipping to the driver side.

After a good ten minute driving in silence, you open your voice, your fingers nervously fondling on the button of your purse. “Thank you for waiting. You are such a lifesaver, I-I seriously don’t know what I will do if you are not there.”

Taehyung nods, his right hand brushing through the expanse of his jaw and you intensely follow the swear-to-god attractive gesture. God, you cannot believe how someone can be that charming while driving, it’s seriously making no sense. You continue after clearing your throat. “What happened? Why didn’t you leave?”

He glances at you with tranquility, shrugging his shoulder. “I was about to leave, but I don’t know. The song I was listening to was good so I just decided to stay for a while, and then you walk out so I follow you. The end.”

Your eyes narrowed, staring at him intently. “That is a lie.”

“Maybe.”

“Then tell me what happened!”

He shrugs. “Nah.”

You look at him in obvious exasperation. “Taehyung, for god sake tell me what happened! What can possibly make you stay in this hellish neighborhood?”

Taehyung grins. “I don’t ask what happened with the hickey on your collarbone either, sweetheart. And It’s nothing, seriously. Nothing out of the ordinary.”

Your fingers instinctively land on your clavicle, feeling the strange pain emerging when so. Shamefully ducks your head in embarrassment, you throw your face to your side of the window. “You're annoying.”

“I’ve been called that a lot. By you, actually.”

“Then maybe you should stop being annoying.” You sarcastically grin.

He jokingly wriggles his sharp eyebrows. “That’s kind of my trademark, so I’m sorry I cannot fulfill the request, sweetheart.” You huff and decided not to continue the endless debate.

Another ten minutes filled with silence, until you break it with your still irritated tone. “Can we play my song now? The song you played before sucks.”

Taehyung murmurs an agreement, a thin smile finding his lips. You connect your phone, then finding the one song you always tune into. The song that reminds you of the good times when life is less than complicated.

“Is this Bee Gees?” Taehyung asks with an amused tone, nothing ever crosses his mind that you would be the type to tune to oldies songs for drive songs. 

“Yup. This is More Than a Woman.” You nod, then send a judgmental stare at him. “What? You think I am lame for listening to old songs? Yeah, no surprise there.”

He smiles heartily, finding this new side of you that is unforeseen yet very delightful. “No, I actually like this song too. My father used to sing this song when I was a kid. The whole album, actually. I even have the vinyl cd in my room.”

Seeing that Taehyung is indeed earnest, opening up a little about his life, you find yourself smiling at your own great memory as well. “Me too. My grandfather used to sing this song to my grandmother, uhm.. before he passed away.. a few years ago. I would always listen to this song and then I would always be reminded about how much love they have for me.” 

You don’t even know why you are explaining such an intimate story of your life to a fuckboy whom you barely know. But now, it’s hard to even think Taehyung is the jackass everyone and even himself proclaimed. He is just a man—a friend, who helps you when you need him the most, who doesn’t pry and understand the space you need better than anyone else. You are grateful he is there, and to say these personal things to him.

Taehyung smiles at you and you can’t help but to reciprocate. His fingers tapping rhythmically on the wheel along to the beat, humming along with you to the wonderful music inside his car.

Here in your arms I found my paradise

My only chance for happiness

And if I lose you now I think I would die

Oh say you'll always be my baby, we can make it shine

We can take forever, just a minute at a time

*

“I don’t know where my keys are!”

Yup, you are a certified, sloppy idiot. You have been standing on your house gate for exactly fifteen minutes, trying to find where the fuck did you place your keys. You are trying to search your short lived memory where you placed them, but the only thing you remember before going to Han River to meet Taehyung is how rushed and panicked you are, trying to find excuses for your grandmother.

And Taehyung stood besides you, helping you to hold the flashlight so you can make anything inside your ransacked purse. “I can’t find it!” You hiss worriedly, glancing at your watch. “I don’t think my parents are home yet, and my grandmother should be asleep by now. I will just sneak in.”

“This is dangerous! Someone might catch you and think we are thieves, Y/N, I don’t think it's a good idea, especially at this time.” Taehyung advises, his tone full of worry. You look to him scornfully, accepting that he is indeed right. There are cctvs being installed on every corner of the street, and you don’t think it would be pretty to be caught and perceived as a thief while climbing your own house. Your parents will figure out either way, and to be told by your neighborhood security that their daughter is climbing inside with a ‘help’ of a man would be the last thing you want to happen.

“I do not know what I have to do.” You mutter, hiding your face inside your palms, cursing your forgetful self internally. Now you have to wait for your parents, confessing that you indeed get out at nearly midnight. And they will chastise you to know where you have been, immediately accusing you for meeting your ex—which in fact is indeed the truth. You are screwed.

“Hey, we can wait for your parents then. We’ll think of a way, no worry, Y/N.” Taehyung said carefully, noticing your forlorn gesture with hands resting on your shoulder. You look at him with a frown and reddened face.

“It’s okay if you have to leave. You have been a great help, Taehyung. I seriously do not know what would happen if it weren’t for you.” You mutter in regret, then he answers by sternly shaking his head, clicking his tongue.

“Hey, I might be a dick but I am certainly not to that extent to leave a girl on the street nearing dawn.”

“I can protect myself, if that’s what you are worried about.”

Taehyung chuckles, keeping his hands inside his pocket. “I am well aware that you can kick my ass to ditch, Y/N. But my conscience just won’t let me.”

Before you can persuade him again to go back home, the familiar creaking sound of your front door is heard and you throw your head back inside, detecting your grandmother, peering outside to the sound of her granddaughter.

“Grandma! You are not asleep?!” You nearly yell, but then realize that it is already so late for any loud noises and manage to lower your volume. “It’s past midnight, you should be asleep! I told you to sleep first and not wait for me.”

“Huh, this girl! How can I sleep when I know you are still wandering out there, at this late of night.” Your grandma hisses, walking with her cane to the gate. “Why didn't you come in? Where are your keys?”

The frown on your lips deepen. “I lost them, grandma…”

Your grandma hiss in distaste, before realizing that his granddaughter is not alone. While opening the gate, her tone changes as she questions the man beside you “Who is this? Is this your friend?”

You just remembered that Taehyung is still present, now both his hands politely joined and a civil, yet timid smile on his lips. You look back at your grandma, strongly warning you with her intimidating gaze to introduce him right away. “Y-yes! Grandma, This is Taehyung. Tae, this is my grandma.”

“Good evening, grandma. I’m sorry we arrived so late tonight, I can assure you it will not happen again.” Taehyung apologizes with heavy sincerity and a bow. You are mildly confused by his never-seen-before politeness, especially to your family. Of course it will not happen again, Taehyung would easily walk out of your life after the constant problem you put him in. But still, it brings such a strange emotion to your heart on how good-mannered he is to your grandmother—and you kind of have a slight hint of why.

“Kids these days, seriously.” Your grandma shakes her head, but still motions both of you to enter the house. “Come in, then. You two.”

“Taehyung can’t stay, grandma! He has to go back, it’s been a long night.” You try to reason in panic, but your grandmother’s slap on your shoulder to enter the house quickly resonates that she is not open for negotiation. There is no other way than to follow her order, so you begrudgingly leave the scene, with an apologetic smile on your face to Taehyung’s way. You seriously owe him nearly everything—you swear you will do anything to repay him.

“You really have to go back, Taehyung? I want to talk to you, though. I promise it won’t take long.” Your grandmother intimidatingly offers, and Taehyung gulps in overwhelming nerves. It is probably the first time for a while since he met someone’s close relative—he even hardly met his own—and your grandma is too intimidating; he doesn’t even remember the word no. 

“Let’s talk, then.” Your grandma smiles, waving off the cold persona right after taking in his acceptance. She rests her hand on Taehyung's arm to lead him inside the house. “Have you eaten? We have some extra food. I also made Darjeeling tea, it’s good for you young people. I know you will like it.” Taehyung smiles with a nod, his head slightly spins and an aloof thought invades his head, all regarding his precious platinum rule. 

Never ever meet a girl’s relatives under any, any circumstance ever.

God, this is not good.

*

It’s already past 1am, and an hour after you safely arrived inside your house. Upstairs, you wanted to help Taehyung dealing with your pesky grandmother, but she refused you to come down and mentioned that she wanted to talk to him only. You know what that means—another drama coming your way. You seriously cannot stress how much you owe Taehyung, he has been nothing but kind and helpful today. You wanted to eavesdrop on their conversation, but your body is too tired to even deal with even more drama. You just need to set your grandmother straight that Taehyung is just a friend, right in the morning. Your parents don’t have to know as well, and everything can go as well as before.

But even with your nearly numb body, your consciousness is wide awake and you cannot sleep. So after a short while and hearing the soft engine of Taehyung’s car far in the distance, you dial his number. Hopefully it still has power—you remember Taehyung mentioned how near dead it was. 

Right after two beeps he thankfully picks up. “Hi, Taehyung. You went home already?”

“Yup.” He emphasizes on the p.

You wince at his distant answer. “Are you mad at me? I apologize, I am nothing but a hassle today, you must regret helping me.”

Then his lighthearted chuckle is heard, and the tense on your body instinctively loosen up. “It’s okay. Not gonna lie, today is quite overwhelming. But I think in a weird, twisted way I needed that. A distraction, I mean.”

“Well, at least you are entertained by my lackluster life.” You joke, and both of you cackle. You cannot fathom your feeling right now, hearing his breathy voice on the other side of the call. You know you have been through a lot today, but somehow finally closing it with Taehyung, you feel somewhat relieved. “Did grandma say anything weird?”

“No, we just drank her god-sent Darjeeling tea. I seriously think I need to order it myself. Gonna search for it online after this. Ah, she also said I am handsome.”

You smile heartily, flipping to the other side of your bed. What a lie. “I sure can vouch for that. You are indeed handsome.”

Taehyung loudly gasps, cheeks tingling upon your unpredictable sincere compliment. “What—did you injure your head or what? Are you finally admitting that, Y/N? Never thought I’d hear it from you.”

You catch yourself slipping, slapping your mouth. “Yup, I think I injured my head. But no worry, pretty boys like you are dime a dozen. I’ll find you anywhere.” You nervously snort, internally disagreeing to your own words. There is something about Taehyung’s charming ways that always keep you on the edge, and you have never found it in anyone else.

“That’s more like you.” He hums. “Go to sleep, Y/N. It’s been a long night, you deserve it.”

You hum lowly while closing your eyes, feeling the sudden sleepiness embraces you. “Okay. Thank you so much for today, Taehyung. I owe you one, okay? See you soon.”

Taehyung finally closes the call, a thin smile reaching his lips. Seriously, he doesn’t know how he can go through everything in the span of 24 hours, the thing with Mina, meeting you and breaking all his platinum rules for a girl he thought he wouldn’t see a second time. A statement from your grandmother suddenly passes through his head and Taehyung shifts uncomfortably in his seat.

She is a strong girl, but she is fragile right now, and in need for someone to believe in.

Someone to believe in? That's most absolutely not him. Frankly, he is the absolute far on the other side from someone to believe in. He doesn’t even believe in himself, how could your grandmother say that to him? Does he seriously look like someone to believe?

But when Taehyung rewinds what your grandmother explained, along with the panic attack you had just a few hours ago—he finds it peculiarly identical to himself. In a way, both of you are scarred. Life takes a huge toll on you, and he can understand what you were feeling. Living with a deep scar itself is scary, but now that he knows that he is not alone—there is someone, deeply affected about something alike, he doesn’t feel so alone anymore. All these times he always feels like he needs someone, that he is a burden to someone, but it feels reassuring to be the one lending a hand for someone else’s misery. 

Among the silence and his busy thoughts, the phone rings. Taehyung is quick to answer and the call resonates on his car. “Yes. I need car service. Some idiot bastards just scratched Cecil, it’s pretty bad. They scratched it with knives I think—i don’t really know. You can pick her up on my usual. Thanks.”

*

It has been a week since you last saw Taehyung that eventful night, and even with how desperate you are to text him again, you find yourself hesitating while typing the words. What if he thought you are looking deeper into everything? You are just a mere girl he fucked before, and it is as clear as a day that Taehyung dislikes and avoids any form of attachment—and even though you are not even offering anything other than trying to pay all his kindness back, you are still unsure.

Since that night, one thing that you know is your grandmother loves Taehyung—she can’t stop talking about him and asking where he is ever since that night. Both of your parents are aware as well, they are a bit hysterical at first at the unannounced appearance of a boy close to you—you know how wary they are ever since your last boyfriend, but after hearing how great he is from your grandmother slash the best personality judge to ever exist, your parents easily approve. Could also be to the fact that they are quite amazed by such a young man using a luxury Audi car—yes, your parents are primitives like that.

But another thing you notice is how over-jubilant they are at the sudden appearance of Taehyung, more than you expect. You know how much they have been stressing over the fact that you might still be in contact with your ex—which you still are, but they are better off not knowing—but you didn’t know it would go to that extent. They can finally joke about you finally being in ‘young’ love, which is also total nonsense. 

The worst thing is that your mother even called you and cried one night, telling that she is relieved that you finally can find someone else instead of coming back to your previous toxic relationship with your ex—oh, how can you let her know? At that time, you feel guilty beyond words. There is literally nothing going on between you and Taehyung—you even doubt if you can label whatever going on between you as friendship, it all could be just a charity work on his part, but you don’t have the heart to say so to her. Hence you just nod, promising that you would try asking him the dinner your mother asked for.

And now it’s all more confusing since you don’t know how to approach the matter. There is no way in hell Taehyung would ever agree meeting your parents—and the case itself is helpless. But your parents are very happy now, and to have it knocked away for a lie would greatly affect them in a bad way. Especially starting today, you moved out from your shared apartment back to your parents home. You love your independence, but you desperately need the money, especially since the extra side job of writing columns pays now needs to be shared with your parents as well due to your father's condition that enforces him to do his routine dialysis. The insurance helps, but it still costs massive on the pocket so you are more than willing to help them.

So you are seated now, waiting for your class to start. Your fingers tapping on the keyboard to draft a message that will be sent to Taehyung. It has been twenty agonizing minutes, and by every word typed and erased, you feel jittery. To the point you are finally too tired and give up, slamming your phone on the table and running your fingers through your hair in distress.

The sudden ring of your phone comes into your senses, and you are expecting nothing but then seeing the message, it effectively fastens the pound in your chest and you literally think you will cry. It's literally godsend, actually—how can he come through at the time you need him the most is beyond you.

From : Taehyung

Hi, just wanna ask if that ‘thank you so much for today, Taehyung. I owe you one, okay? See you soon’ thing is true or just bogus since i did not get any message since last week

You smile wholeheartedly, right from ear to ear at his witty message. So you swiftly type in another response, which may or may not contain a bit of a lie but Taehyung is better off not knowing how much you think of him in the past week.

To : Taehyung

Hi, sorry the bitch you are contacting is busy with packing her things to move back home. Can she meet you later this afternoon for lunch?

You don’t even have to wait for another long minute as his reply came almost immediately.

From : Taehyung 

Sure! But she better be paying cause Taehyung is sloppy and forgot to bring his wallet! 😉

You chuckle lightly, typing the cafe name located near college, following another message.

To : Taehyung

Such slop. But no worries, she would gladly pay! Since she should finish the class quite early, she's going to wait for you in the near park, so find her there, okay?

From : Taehyung

Don’t know until when we are going to address ourselves in third perspective but I am all for it. See you soon, beautiful! xx

You roll your eyes at his flirty text. Fuckboys and their annoying suave talks, yet inside, you are unable to hold your lips from smiling—to the point that your ex-roommate had to question how suspiciously vibrant you are today, especially during the worst class to date. You respond with a shake on your head, still with the same foolish smile plastered on your lips that is too eerie to be true for her.

Right after it’s finished, you run to exit the class—more because you need to avoid the question from your best friend on where you are heading, since you are meeting her boyfriend’s best friend you said you hated. It also seems like Taehyung is also inconvenient to let Jungkook know about your rendezvous, so you decide to keep this for yourselves first.

The weather on your way to the cafe is amazing, the afternoon breeze is lukewarm, the sun is adequately shining, conveniently settling on the skin. When you arrive, you take a seat on the nearest bench, heaving a deep breath and close your eyes. You clearly feel happy, contributed due to the weight from thinking about Taehyung and your parents slightly lifted off your shoulder. At least now you are on a talking basis with him. That’s a progress.

But as it always has been, something just had to ruin your temporary happiness. He is there, seated right beside you. Noticing the weight press on the other side of the bench, you look up, and finding your past lover, Jisung.

“Jisung!” You gasp in shock, your heart nearly falls out of your chest. He is here, in your college, right beside you. “What are you doing here?!”

He smiles, his fingers raised to your ear, settling a few stranded hairs behind your ears. The affectionate gesture suddenly throws you off your horse, as the sudden confusion does bring unwanted memories of your past with him. “I just wanted to see you baby. How you are doing, right now. I see you went home safely that midnight, quite shocking I would say.”

At his unpleasant words, you swat his hands away, facing him with a cold, hardened stare. “You are a jerk, you know that? You let me go home all by myself, in your own dangerous neighborhood when I went there to give you what you need. You are seriously the worst.” Muttering your sentence, you feel a tidal wave of anger and sadness crushes you in. 

“Hey, I don’t mean it like that, babe. You also get to go home with your hotshot fling as well, so you can thank me, right?” He sarcastically responds, and you feel repulsed at his words mentioning Taehyung—who in high chance must have brushed his annoying male ego. Jisung scoots to your side, his arms holding you close. But you felt nothing but disgust.

“Don’t be like that, baby. You know I miss you. No matter how far you are searching for someone better, or richer, I will be the only one who understands you and your body, babe.”

You are silent, neither accepting or rejecting his advances. You feel numb, you feel used, yet you don’t do anything to push him away. It’s like whenever he is near, you feel the urge to fix him. He was the victim—and so were you. Yet he was the one that was and still is greatly affected by the wrongdoings of other people. So you still believe that the good Jisung you love is there, somewhere inside this man you barely even know.

Jisung was your boyfriend, two years ago in high school. He was a humble, smart scholarship boy that loved to play soccer. You were just a simple girl who loved to write about everything on your blog, especially lenient towards politics and policy. One simple day after a busy semester—due to your social science project team that always sends you on heated debate with him, Jisung somehow confessed. He told you he always liked you, the way your eyes crinkle while writing, the way you scoff during debate, and especially the way you smile for everyone but him—it was a surprising yet sweet confession, but against all odds you accepted it since you did adore him, even with the debates and nonsensical statements coming out of his mouth. That’s how you started a blooming, new relationship with him.

Six month passed, and you could proudly say that you were indeed in love with him. He was sweet, albeit dumb sometimes, he is the kindest person to ever exist and you loved it for him. Everything was great, but as most things, it all finally went downhill—when a transfer student is registered at your class. His father was the right hand of the president at that time. Few weeks in, you realize that he put too much attention on you. You tried to ignore it, but the contact was getting intense so you set him straight that you did not like him and you had a boyfriend. But being a golden spoon kid since he was born, he never learned rejection. 

One Friday evening, when you had just finished your assignment in the library and were about to meet your boyfriend to head home together, that transfer kid pulled you away and kidnapped you to the back of the school. He was angry at your rejection, and forced you to do the things you never wanted to do with anyone, and you loudly screamed for help. The enormous school was nearing empty due to the weekend, and no one could hear you. You were nearly losing hope, too weak to do anything but cry, then your boyfriend found you. He was going to check up on you since you already took a long time, but seeing the unbelievable scene, he instantly sent a hard punch to the bastard, right on the face. But not even a punch or two suffice, Jisung punched him to pulp until he passed out, with you shivering and crying loudly on the side. 

Then a few days later, everyone finds out about the issue, and somehow the media caught it as well, the president’s right hand son is hospitalized due to a school fight. But one thing that did not sit right was that everything in the story is twisted to transfer kids' benefit. He was hospitalized, so the school and media immediately sided on him, telling that he was injured by a rebellious kid in school and disregarding the real cause of the matter. You tried hard to explain to your headmaster, everyone that might believe you, but there was no evidence and you were the girlfriend—you were trusted not to be objective. So Jisung was expelled from school, and his scholarship was taken away from him. His strict parents did not believe him even a bit and kicked him out of the house. Jisung’s life hit rock bottom. 

You were heartbroken and guilty beyond words. Jisung had his life crumbling down in a moment, all because of you, because he helped you and defended your honor. You owed him everything, and you knew how hard it was for him. Jisung refused to see you, and when you tried talking to him about it, he harshly broke up with you, crying and shouting while implicitly blaming you for how his life turned out. You also cried that evening, and you begged him not to and promised you would do everything in your power to help him.

But no matter how hard you begged him to stay, he still went missing for a few months and you cried nearly everyday. It was killing you, to the point you didn’t even want to go to school anymore. You hated everyone—you hated how unfair life was for him, someone you loved so much. And frankly, you missed Jisung, you miss your ex-boyfriend and would do anything to have him back. There’s never a day you forget sending him a message, apologizing and begging him to come back. 

And he did come back to see you, exactly four months after. But at that time, he already changed. He was no longer the sweet, affectionate Jisung you loved and remembered—he was someone else. He joined and lived with a rebellious gang downtown. As predicted, he did not continue his studies, and god knows what conniving things he was doing to get money on a daily basis. When he came back and professed his love for you, you were hesitant. He was no longer your Jisung, but the complete opposite. But the next day he called you, crying about how life was becoming too hard and wanted to take his own life. That was also the time you’d do anything for him to stop, and agreed to get back with him. And thus began the most horrifying part of your life, one you never even want to remember.

“Baby, don’t you miss me?” He whispers to your ear, noticing your distant stare and silence. But you pushed him away, realizing how improper that you are still in the university area. “I missed you so much. No one can ever suffice your beautiful body against mine, babe.”

“Stop it, Jisung. I am not your sex slave, the one you can do anything against my will.” You hiss, pushing him away with a hardened stare filled with hatred and disgust. “I gave you the money you want. What do you want more from me?”

“I need more, of course.” He grinned, running his fingers on your lips. “Money is hard nowadays, babe. I notice that you got yourself a new, rich fling now. Get some of that hard cash and give it to me, will you?”

You stand up, peering against  in disgust, but you were saddened beyond words—tears pooling on the side of your eyes. “You are the worst human being. I am not giving you anything more, especially when you are going to spend it on gambling and sluts.” 

He pulled you back down, nails stabbing your skin until you are sure it will bleed. Your heart pounds too loud until it echoes in your ear. “Listen here, you bitch. Do you know who caused me like this? It’s you. You ruined my life, and you have to take responsibility for it.”

He lets go of your hand and leaves you trembling and your breath irregular. Dizziness suddenly enters your head, and you never feel alone to that extent you want to puke to the exhausting feeling. You hold your legs closer to your chest, hiding your face inside to shout all the frustration bubbling up in your chest, as loud as you can.

“Y/N, why are you— What did he do?!”

It’s Taehyung, you are well aware it is him. A sudden recognition of the promised lunch you have with him passed through your head and you take a few deep breaths and try to shove the matter far away from your mind. You look up to him with a forced smile, wiping away your tears with the back of your sleeve. “Taehyung, how long have you been here? Sorry, I didn’t—”

“I was here before you even came. I was on the other side of the park, and noticed you were talking to some guy. I did not want to interrupt and left for a while, and I came and you are already crying. What the fuck happened, Y/N?” Taehyung asks in deep frustration on his eyes, his palm cupping your face to look up to him. “Who was he? Was he—the one you were meeting a week ago?”

You are not answering, still looking faraway to nothingness and Taehyung hiss in agitation. “Y/N, I am no longer taking this lightly. This—this is bad. Please, tell me about this.” When you are still silent, Taehyung looks at you somberly, pleading for you to look back at him. “Y/N. I am your friend. Please, please let me help you.”

And then you break down into loud sobs, finding purchase in his arms around you. You never felt so sad before—all the bad memories from your past coming back to you, throwing you back into a state of panic. But as Taehyung soothes your back in a calming manner, listening to your incoherent words, you can gradually breathe. “I am sorry. I am such a mess.” You whisper to him, and let go of the hug. “I don’t think I can tell you without you being disgusted at who I really am. I am not the girl you thought I was, Tae. I am way worse.”

Taehyung looks up at you with a serene smile, wiping the tears away from your cheek. “Y/N, I am telling this because I know you will not prematurely judge, but I kissed a married woman last week. There’s no way you can top that.”

Your eyes are wide in shock at that, and Taehyung smiles at your reaction. Regardless of being scared that you will assume anything without him getting to explain, he is just glad he can be truthful to someone, especially when it is you. “I don’t know if you would really listen to my boring story. But it has been bothering my mind for quite sometimes now. Can I drop that on you?”

You nod and smile at his effort trying to take your minds off things and feel better. Not that you dislike it—it does succeed. “Of course. But not if we have to sit here, starving. Do you want to get in?”

He smiles, squeezing your shoulder and lead you inside the cafe. “If you are paying, then yes. If not, let’s go back to my frat and ask that shithead Jungkook to pay instead.”

*

After approximately four hours talking about each other and dirty looks thrown by the waitress at your prolonged stay inside, you moved places from the cafe to Han River, the exact spot you met him before—Taehyung said this was a place for him whenever he is sad and needs some time to think. Did you understand him better. He was a child of divorce, he is living with his father in Seoul and his mother is remarried and staying in London. The last time he met his father was six months ago.  At that time he said that he missed his grandmother a lot, he lived with her all through childhood but after she passed away, he was mostly taken care of by nannies. That’s why meeting your grandmother was a remedy or it’s kind—he was reminded of the fond memories with his own grandmother.

Taehyung also told you about the married woman he mentioned previously, and you felt sad for him. It must not have been easy, someone who does not really believe in love to have feelings for someone he can never have. But in a way, he believe there is a silver lining to meeting her—and in a way, you are amazed by how mature he was throughout everything. Yes, Taehyung may have scarred himself and the people around him, and done many things wrong as well, but to be able to live and act the way he did really brings him to a whole new light.

So when you told him with bright, tearful eyes about how much you are proud of what he did, it could be one of the moments Taehyung never thought he would cry in front of someone else but did. It was hard, like always feeling like he did everything wrong—but you are here, right in front of him, giving him the word he needed the most. He is glad that he was able to talk it out to someone, and that someone being you.

And when you are seated inside his car, looking out to the beautiful light posts alongside the Han River, you know it was your turn to open up and you did. You told him about everything, leaving no details about your past with Jisung. Even when you are just two sentences in, you are already crying, but it was inevitable. Taehyung holds your hands, his eyes filled with understanding. “Hey, hey. You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to.”

But you shake your head, smiling up to him and squeezing his hand back. “No-I need to tell you this. I want to tell you this. I think one of the main problems is that I always keep this from everyone—especially my friends. I would love it for you to know.”

Then you continue about your past experience. About how Jisung helped you against a bastard who was able to turn everyone to his side in the end. How Jisung left and put the blame on you. And in the end, you find yourself not being able to continue, but Taehyung kept you close, hugging you as he pecked the top of your head. “I loved him—I really did. I thought I did. It was all my fault—”

“Y/N, It’s not your fault. At the beginning, you both are just victims but after that, he was nothing but a manipulative asshole who used you for his own benefits.” Taehyung feels his heart clenched at the thoughts of your past with him—how you were held captive and forced to keep up to whatever vile activities he was doing with his gang. “Y/N, you got to stop going out with this guy. He did not even love you anymore—he is just using you…”

You know it, your sanity always told you that, but the moment Taehyung said it, it’s just.. disheartening. “I know, Tae. But—what if? What if the accident did not happen? What if we were not together? He could be living the best life right now, attending the best university in the country, meeting someone else better, helping his family's economy…”

Taehyung caresses your head, his low whispers awakening your senses. “Y/N, we cannot include what if scenario in this, you know it. Yes, there is a possibility that it should have gone better, but there is also a worse scenario too, right? And to be frank, all of the choices were on him. He could have done something better with his life, yet he was the one who chose hanging out with those bad guys, not you. So please stop hurting and blaming yourself now.”

You nod, resting your head inside his chest, crying every suffocating tears to your limit. “I wanted to. I wanted to stop, Tae. But I can’t, he will always come back.”

“Y/N, it might hurt but I think you should go to the police.” He advises, and you let go, looking up to him in shock. “It is just a suggestion, don’t hate me. I do think it is for the better. Your parents even forbid you to do so, and you were even hospitalized and depressed because of him. Now he always wants something from you, blackmailing you.. He does nothing but damage to you.”

Inside, this delusional part of you wanted to defend Jisung and all your own past doings, but you know you are not making any sense and Taehyung is right. But throwing Jisung inside jail? The thought even scares you. “I don’t know. I’ll think about it.”

Taehyung scoff in disbelief at your clear disdain of his suggestion. “Wait.. Do you—do you possibly still have feelings for this bastard?”

At that statement, you look away from his proding eyes. Do you? You are not even sure about that. Yes, Jisung could be the worst, most toxic people that caused nothing good to you, but you cannot lie that you always find yourself finding the goodness inside him, always reacting to his touches and sweet talks—it’s involuntary. You are an idiot that somehow still likes him… “I.. I don't know.”

“This is crazy.” Taehyung whispers, more to himself. He doesn’t even know how you haven’t thrown this bastard inside jail—and it is somehow because you still have feelings for him. “This is overly altruistic and borderline masochist, Y/N.”

“I… I know. Can we please drop it? I-I don’t want to talk about it for now.”

Taehyung realizes that he has been insensitively judgmental of you, and he winces and reaches out for your hand. “I am sorry. You are one of the strongest, greatest women I have ever known, and...  And I guess it’s sad to know that you have been through this and.. It’s nothing. I apologize.”

You look up to him and nod, looking up to him with a warm smile. “That’s okay, I can see where you are coming from. It’s a surprise as well, as I never thought you would be the great  listener type and give kickass advice too, Tae. You are a very great friend, do you know it?”

He cheekily smiles, shooting you a wink. “I’ve been told so. By myself, I mean.”

“I think we should drop the depressing, real talk.” You chuckle, and so does he. “I am glad we did it, but let's refrain from it for the time being. I am fucking drained now, and hungry.”

“Me too! I am starving. Do you want to grab something on the way home?” Taehyung looks around in vision, trying to move his car. You did not even realize the disappointment in the pit of your stomach at the mention of going home—your parents and grandma are the reason, but majorly due to the thought of the day is about to come to an end. It’s just ten pm, and you really, really had a pleasant time with Taehyung. “We can grab takeouts too, if you have to go home now. Or even we can go directly home and—”

He was nervous, and you cannot help but to smile of reassurance. “It’s okay. I’m thinking of McDonald’s. You in?”

He coos loudly with fake tears. “You know what, Y/N? You just get me.”

The way to McDonald’s, your mind is suddenly caught on the fact that your family is assuming Taehyung as your boyfriend. “Hi, Tae. Can I ask you something?”

“Sure, sweetheart.” He responds lightly, without noticing what the nickname does to you, focusing on the street in front of him, and you cannot hold the blush blooming on your cheek. You were thankful that it was already dark, or you would have let him catch you slipping for the nth time today. “Anything you want to know?”

“Yes. So…. get this.” You start with vivid nerves, looking down to your lap timidly. “My grandma really, really likes you. I don’t know what happened, or how can you hypnotist her since all she can talk about now is you. I think she even forgot I am the granddaughter sometimes.” Taehyung chuckles widely, showing the creases on the corner of his eyes and it is so infectious you can’t hold a smile either, the tense on your shoulder slightly loosening. “And since she could not shut up about you, my parents are aware too. About you, I mean.”

Taehyung looks at you, a hint of surprise on his face. “Uhm, really? Wow, never thought it would be that big of a deal.”

“It is. I didn’t tell you this, but I have never introduced any friends, especially male ones to family ever since Jisung happened…” You mutter, volume getting smaller by each word. “So, it was a big deal for them. And my family can be presumptuous sometimes.. And…” You hold your breath, your mind conflicted whether you should tell him or not because you are sure Taehyung would reject you straight away and harshly. You know it well, but your heart is pained at the imagination of Taehyung telling you to fuck off with your silly proposition. So you take a drastic turn and hold back your request. “I...No. It’s nothing.”

Taehyung looks at you in worry. “Hey, you can tell me anything. It’s okay.”

You look up to him with a pout. “Can you promise me you won’t be mean?”

“What are you—of course I won’t, Y/N.” He giggles, giving your hand a light squeeze that nearly takes your breath away. “You can tell me everything.”

“Okay, here goes.” You whisper, trying to muster the leftover courage. “So, my parents and grandma kinda can’t stop talking about you... thinking you are my boyfriend. I never brought anyone after Jisung and… they just thought it was a big deal.”  You look straight ahead, still afraid to find whether there is disgust on Taehyung’s face.

“So?” Taehyung asks neutrally. “It’s fine. You can just tell them the truth.. that we’re not dating?” There was an edge on his response, and you are certain he is not getting anything out of your desperate sentence.

“But I don't think I want to drop that on them.” You continue breathily, biting your lower lips in hesitation. “They are going through some tough times right now, with my father's sickness and all—the news about me dating an averagely decent man with no crime history list could probably be the only good thing going for them. They’d be disappointed to learn that we are just friends.”

“Well, they don’t know who I am yet—what if I am a mafia man with a kick ass car that I bought with money from bank robbery?”

You look up to him, rolling your eyes but trying to display your best puppy face to date. “You left a great impression on them… Can we at least pretend we are dating? For just a few weeks, and it’s nothing big, I swear. You still can do your hookups, whatever okay to you. I could just tell we broke up in the next month or whenever convenient.”

Taehyung looks at you in hesitation, a little bit unsure. “I know—but are you sure? All rom-coms never ended well for that fake relationship bullshit.”

“Surprise on you watching lots of rom coms aside, I know we’ll be fine. All those cliche bullshit always ends in anyone falling in love, but that’s not us, right…?” The second you say those things, a literal large, blazing red exclamation point on the side of the street. You are hoping it is not a bad omen. “Please say yes. I know this is a big thing and I owe you a lot already, Taehyung. But I swear this is the last time. I would do anything for you to say yes.”

Fake dating you? He did not know how to do that, especially since he has to talk to your parents whatsoever—even the thought scares him as he never got along with his own either. What if he messes up and everything goes down in ashes? Taehyung literally was about to reject, when your last sentence caught his attention, shown by his raised left eyebrows. “Anything?”

You scorn, sending a look at him in disgust. “Are you seriously asking sex out of the deal right now, Taehyung?”

“No! Of course not. That is unnecessary. You know I can have sex with you with your greatest consent and you’d be begging for it.” The cocky jackass dares to wink, and you hate how partly right he is with that. Well, maybe not just partly. “So, not that. Okay, I will agree to your proposition. I have something in mind.”

You nod, rubbing your palms together. “Okay. Lay it on me.”

“I want you to stop seeing that guy—Jisung, I mean..” You were expecting a lot of things, but not that. Especially not that. Hence the look of disbelief displayed in your face, eyes open like saucers. “ It’s for your own good, Y/N. There is no good coming out of hanging out with that guy. I know it’s not easy—I won’t force you all at once. So by the end of our fake relationship, I want you to completely stop everything. If he still insists on seeing you, or anything harmful to you, you put a 50 meters restriction on him, throw him into a jail or anything. You have to stop seeing this guy.”

You look at his challenging gaze, and seeing his expression you know his mind is already made. There are no other options besides take it or leave it. “But you are doing it for me. Don’t you want to ask anything? Other than that?”

He firmly shakes his head. “Nope. That alone would be a very great satisfaction on my part.”

“Serious? You don’t want anything else?” You ask one more time. “Just making sure you are getting the best out of this deal, since it won’t happen ever again.”

“Yup. And maybe if you insist, you can bring me breakfast or lunch too. That would be convenient since I tend to forget them.” He is joking, but you nod in all sincerity. You know how much you really need to do this, your parents have been struggling a lot—more or less you take a huge role in that, so at least you want to repay them even with a smooth, hopefully foolproof lie. “Your grandma must be a good cook; I tasted it a bit before and it’s heavenly. Maybe you can pack some of her dishes for me too.”

You nod. “She is. So… This means you in?”

Taehyung nods, with evident doubt still painted across his face. “Maybe. What does this exactly entail?”

“The regular, 1980 primitive relationships? No ass grabbing, no any mention of sexual things, no funny business. This needs to be very, very likable to my parents. You need to show you are the committed type that can only love one person and one person only, fall in love hard or that type of romcom bullshit.”

“Wow, so you are asking me to be the exact opposite of me, then. Did you just roast me, Y/N?” You giggle and nod—Taehyung might be a jerk but he is not a fool. Seeing your mischievous expression, he pinches your cheek with a scrunched lips. “I see. So no ass grabbing, no mention of sexual things and funny business—it’s only when your parents are around, right?”

It’s now your turn to glare. “I’m kidding. I’ll wait until you ask it yourself.” He winks, and you roll your eyes. Same old, fuckboy Taehyung. Will he be able to pull the act off is beyond you. “Anything else? Should I take you from home everyday, or domestic bullshit like that too?”

“Not really, but maybe once or twice per week? We can grab food on the way home if you want to. And Friday or Saturday nights too—but only if you don’t have any party to attend. If you have no worries, i’ll just make up some lies.”

“It’s okay. I’ll take you out on those days.” He nonchalantly nods, like he just did not imply about giving up his parties and fuckboy activities for you. It is quite a surprise—you expect him to immediately refuse everything involving those holy days, and it sends an anonymous feeling right through your heart. 

“Beside, it will be just a month right? I’ll be okay missing a party or two.”

You clear your throat, looking down in faint disappointment. What were you thinking, seriously? Did you somehow expect him to sacrifice that much to mere, old you? He is a saint to even want to spend his friday night eating junk food with you rather than partying with those porcelain pretty girls on his side. “Sure.”

Another ten minutes spent just enjoying the silence with other Bee Gees songs playing in the background, and Taehyung breaks the silence. “So, if in case I refuse this. What would you do then?”

You purse your lips in contemplation since you haven’t even thought that far. What if Taehyung refuses? “I don’t know, haven’t thought that far. Ask Hoseok, maybe? He is polite, nice, cute too. My parents would be impressed.”

Taehyung snorts, a hint of dislike palpable across his beautiful features at your mention of his frat buddy, the one you acquainted to. “Wow. Just a few minutes into this fake relationship and you are already comparing your fake boyfriend to someone else. What a nice fake girlfriend you are.”

You fold your arms in front of your chest in irritation. “Hey, I just say what I think is right! You cannot lie that Hoseok indeed looks fine and cute, he is well-mannered too. And the fuck, why are you so self-centered? I am not saying it to make you jealous, you—” 

At your last sentence words, Taehyung suddenly hits break, abruptly stopping his Cecil from moving; your head almost strikes the dashboard if it weren’t for his arms holding you still. You are about to curse him, right before you can see the dangerous, cocky smirk formed on his lips, then the alarm inside your head goes off, all words are dead on your tongue. 

“A little bit you should know about your fake boyfriend, Y/N. I am very, very territorial. A word of advice? Never test it for yourself.”

*

So come the first day your plan of faking your relationship in front of your family. It is Monday morning, both you and Taehyung have an 8am class. Regardless of the inconvenient of waking up, it is simultaneously the perfect time to fake those lovey dovey teeth-rotting routines in front of your parents and quickly excuse yourself with attending an early class as a reason. So that’s how you force yourself up a half an hour earlier than usual—since you always woke up at 7.30 for an 8 am class—put an effort to present yourself better. You know your mother wakes up early every morning, so you purposefully blow your hair with your loud ass hair dryer to invite her in and ask why the hell are slobs like you doing up so loud at 6am in the morning.

“Nothing, Taehyung is actually picking me up this morning, so I just.. I just want to prepare early.” You fake a shy smile, and that’s how your irritated mother goes 180 degree changes and help you decide on what you should wear—a blue sundress that sits on your knees, along with a matching navy dress shoes, which is kinda unlike you—who the fuck masochist enough to wear makeup and dress for an 8am Monday class?

And you are fidgeting on your dining room seat now, counting the seconds for Taehyung to appear and finally take you out from this hell hole called your house—your mother can’t stop gushing about you being picked up by your handsome new boyfriend. He should be here anytime now, is it possible that he bails on you the second he really needs to execute the plan?

Few minutes go by and you are this close to leaving by yourself, and the familiar car engine sound is heard and you instinctively look out the window. It’s Cecil—god, you are even addressing Taehyung’s dead stuff with names too now—parked in front of your lawn, you can hardly believe it really is him. You swiftly stand up, hearts pounding a bit with your mind turning hazy. You are seriously going to do this—you are faking a relationship with Taehyung. The Kim Taehyung. You are seriously fucked.

“It’s your boyfriend! Invite him in for breakfast, Y/N!” Your mother giggles, and you answer with a wholehearted shake of head, internally cringing of the image. You are a genius for thinking every possible risk beforehand.

“No, mom. We have an 8am. I packed lunch too, we are going to eat it later, it’s okay.” You answer her hastily, securing your bag on your shoulder before walking out to open the gate for him. You can feel the cold sweat perspiring—there is no doubt your relatives are now scrutinizing every movement of your being. At the thought of being caught, you can’t even breathe normally, too wasteful of the air around you.

Yet when you open the gate and see Taehyung on the other side, smiling warmly at you, your heart literally skips a beat. You cannot believe it is really him, wearing a flannel shirt and black jeans, a bucket of purple rose on his hand. His black gleaming hair is neatly styled sideways, displaying a hint of his forehead. He simply looks… breathtaking. Is it really him, standing in front of you right now? Are you hallucinating?

“Good morning. You look beautiful today.” He greets with a compliment you never thought you will ever hear coming from him—or anyone the first thing in the morning, along with a charming smile that somehow brighten your vision.

“Thank.. you? And good morning to you too..” You whisper breathlessly, still in haze of the fact that he is here, standing in front of you.

“I brought you flowers.” He says, handing over the flowers to you. You receive it with vivid hesitation, looking down in shock while he continues, still with the same smile. “Should I hug you now?”

“W-what?”

But before you can even respond, Taehyung quickly holds you by the waist, pulling you close inside his arm, resting his chin on your shoulder. Your head is literally spinning—the warmth radiating from his body resulting in a strange emotion, but it was gone before you can even realize. “Let’s greet your parents, and then we can go? Are you okay with that?”

Still in a daze, you are only able to muster a nod as an answer. Taehyung just now, this is not the Taehyung you remember—the despicable fuckboy that doesn’t give a shit about anything and anyone, and is always looking only for short fun and severely allergic to any sort of attachment. And those eyes looking out for you and those acts he put up, you don’t know it’s just you or there is literally something so deep about it. Like he is not doing this just for charity and help you—but because somehow he really wants to. Are you that delusional?

So after saying goodbye to your parents still with not much words coming out from you—Taehyung mostly does the small talks and excuses for the both of you, you are now seated inside his car. “Hey. Are you okay? Did I do something wrong?” He suddenly asks, gazing intently at you with mild concern on his face. “I mean.. you are kinda silent. Is there—“

You are quick to rebut. “Nothing! Nothing’s wrong, I am just.. shocked. That’s all.”

He raised his left eyebrow. “Why?”

“I mean—I mostly did not expect you’d be this dedicated. You wear flannels, jeans, style your hair nicely when I know the most decent thing you wore could be your celine overpriced shirt and loose trousers. You even bought flowers! How can I not be shocked?” You nearly yell in defense, and Taehyung smiles at your amusing reaction.

“What can I say? I am a very, very dedicated person in whatever I do.” He cockily responds, and you scoff. 

“Pssh—Tell that to your studies.” 

He gasps in shock at your insult. “I get results! And I don’t wanna brag, but I literally watched three rom coms yesterday just to get into character. You have to applaud me for my effort.”

You peer at him—like all the changes he did isn’t weird enough. “Why?”

“Just because. This is the stepping stone of my acting gigs, I might offer fake boyfriend service after this. I really need to buy those McDonalds nuggets again.” You sigh, remembering a few days ago when Taehyung tasted your nuggets—not an euphemism—for the first time and literally ordered another five portions just for himself. Well, not like he can’t easily buy shares of McDonalds if he wants to.

Five minutes in silence, before Taehyung carefully brushes your arm with his own, somehow affectionately. “Regardless of this being faked whatsoever, I really do think you look beautiful today. You always look beautiful—but that dress outstandingly looks good on you.” He breathily compliments with a shy smile. You literally were expecting that flirty, mischievous eyes glint your way, so you can disregard it easily with Taehyung being a horny dog, but all you can detect from him is sincerity and you are silenced. It was like he wasn’t complimenting you just because of anything, other than his own will. And you do not know how to reply—you are not mentally prepared for that kind of sincere reaction coming from that renowned fuckboy.

“All jokes aside—I really think we pulled it off.” He giggles in delight. “You got nothing to worry about, sweetheart. I positively think they are charmed.”

A little voice inside you tells you that your parents are not the only one charmed, but you forcefully bury the thoughts away, throwing your gaze outside the window.

*

Few days passed without a hitch, and you can proudly proclaim everything went smoothly. Taehyung did offer to pick you up every morning, but it did not even make sense with your different schedules and the fact that he literally lives inside the university area with his frat. During those five days, you could easily reason with your parents about Taehyung’s whereabouts, saying he is busy but you explain that you meet him everyday for lunch. You are not fully lying though—you always deliver the food you promised, but whenever you do, you give it in a secluded area, and quickly leave as not to be catched by anyone. 

It’s not that Taehyung really asks to keep it under the table—but you just assume that it would be really awkward for the both of you if you were to be caught by someone. You know how fast the news would travel, saying that your college resident's most favorite fuckboy—especially after Jeon Jungkook's retirement—has a complicated relationship with a very plain girl such as you. It would be a shame for him, and you don’t really need another reminder about how undeserving you are to par with him.

Friday night it is, and you have been held hostage since afternoon until now, exactly 11pm by the team task paper you will be submitting Monday, along with Jinyoung who is your teammate and shares the class with you. Library closes at 6pm, so both of you continue on it, working alongside on the desk outside the library. Regardless of the short time knowing each other, you are glad to be partnered up with him—he is very thoughtful, smart, kind and easy to talk to. You are most definitely not complaining.

“We did it. I can’t believe we did it.” You whispers, faking sobs about how glad you are while typing soundly the last paragraph on your paper. Jinyoung chuckles, having a deep breath of gladness that everything has finally come to an end. It was clear that he has something on his mind—could probably due to the fact that his phone has been blowing up for the hundredth time already just in a span of an hour. You are surprised he even stayed this long—his part is already completed two hours ago yet he still insists that the call is nothing important, and he’d be okay helping you with the part you completely need help on, no matter how many times you ask him you’d be doing fine on your own.

Your phone suddenly rings, signaling an incoming message, so you check it with a quick glance. It was from Taehyung—but then you roll your eyes and continue whatever you were doing with no further thoughts whatsoever.

From : Taehyung

Hey, where are you? Come to the frat house, we are having a party babe xx

“So, where are you heading to? It’s Friday night, are you going out? Or to a party?” You nonchalantly ask, closing your laptop while gathering your things. He nods, typing something on his phone and gives you a short smile.

“Yup. My girlfriend has been asking for awhile.” He says like it’s nothing, and your jaw nearly drops. It’s his girlfriend, calling him like there’s no tomorrow? And he just ignored her for the sake of doing a task with you? Talk about dedication to education—but you suddenly feel the overwhelming guilt.  It’s not like you can’t do it tomorrow, but you are a perfectionist and just prefer anything to be completed asap before your over-glorified weekend. 

“You should’ve told me! I would be totally okay if you left first, there is no biggie. Besides, there is still time tomorrow to do it.” You desperately explain where you are coming. Jinyoung is kind, but it was unnecessary. “Now I feel guilty.”

“It’s no biggies! I do agree with you, I don’t want to hold it until yesterday. I also have something important I have to do.” Jinyoung assures, but you still feel not good about taking his Friday night out with the girlfriend for your silly ambition. “I.. I kinda have something in my mind. I know we just met—but do you wanna hear me out?”

You easily agree, and Jinyoung vigorously reaches out for something inside his pocket, and shows a red velveteen, small rectangular box. The gasp was inevitable—never in a million years would you ever guess it would be that. “Is.. is this an engagement ring?”

“Yes! Yes. I am going to propose to my girlfriend tomorrow.” He says, eyes sparkling with excitement and nerves. Seeing how sincere he is brought a lump in your throat. “I know it is early—everyone tells me I’m too young and whatever. But I’ve been with her since we were in middle school, and I just don’t think I want to be with anyone else. I am not usually that naive, courageous person to begin with, but I have never been more sure about anything like this.” He whispers, an evident edge is heard on his last word. “I.. I just want you to give me another perspective. Or not—if you are uncomfortable, but I just.. I am just curious. What do you think?”

“Wow. That’s a lot to process.” You whisper with a nervous chuckle. You don’t even know what you are thinking—too much is happening inside your mind and you have a hard time to process and make out something of it. “I think it’s amazing. And you know this girl for a longtime now, it’s a very beautiful thing and… I think you should go for it.” 

“Really? You think so?” Jinyoung asks, kind of not believing his own hearing. “You are actually the first one to support me. Not even my parents do.”

“I think the world has been too skeptical of love.” You whisper, the lump is getting evident and it is hard to even speak. “I know that there may be a hundred case of failed relationships out there—and people tend to assume everything will follow those majority cases. Even those pessimistic minds could even lead to more failure, you know? There’s nothing good that comes out with anyone tends to overthink so many things.” 

“But anyone still cannot deny the fact that there are two happy relationships that go against those hundreds. The chance might be small, but there still is. And if those years together makes you willing to put everything on the line and take the chance, I think you should propose..” One thing that you are sure of is that each word said you are no longer talking to Jinyoung, but yourself. It is to address your recent trait, about how sceptical you have been about having a real, sincere relationship with someone and always settle for less or good enough.

Well it's true. You heard and experienced these people around you, all the struggles, ruined relationships, especially the obnoxious men you had relationships with, have made you greatly cryptic of ever finding a love that lasts. You never thought it would be that hard to face one cold truth—maybe it’s you that really needs to start finding it with the ones that have the chance to have that with you. Instead of spending it for someone that only is looking for short fun, using you only for your body and leaving the moment he’s had enough.

“Thank you for that.” He mutters, the eyes filled with emotions yet his face lightens after hearing your encouraging words. “Exactly what I need to hear.”

Both of you are now standing on the busy street. “You wanna go home? Let me take you back.” Jinyoung kindly offers, and you couldn’t even hold back the snicker.

“It’s okay. Your soon-to-be wife is waiting.” You mum with a wide smile, even with a hint of sadness that you cannot suppress. You reach out to squeeze him in a short hug. “Good luck, Jinyoung. Wishing the best for you and her.”

After saying goodbye, you walk in the opposite directions of him, wandering with no exact destination. You don’t know what exactly happened to your lively mood, now completely blue and somber. What is it that makes you feel like you are now at the lowest point of your life? Is it possible that you just realized how far you have strayed from the person you wish to be, and now you are desperate to do something and rearrange your life back to the way it should be?

It’s quite depressing to know that there is the ideal life you have been planning and craving for a long time now, but one day you wake up and find you are heading the complete opposite direction and already strayed too far.

Your phone is ringing again, and you can just know it is Taehyung on the other side. He could be the last person you want to see now, but you are desperate to just answer and make him stop. You are most definitely not in the mood to talk with his annoying, pesky ass.

“Taehyung—”

“Y/N, where are you?! I asked your mother since you are not replying and she told me you haven’t come back home.” He shouts in discernible concern and worry with a faint music beat heard in the background—he must be still at the party, since 12am is still too early for these people to head back home, on the way of bad drunken state to the point of throwing up on the streets. If that so, why would he still be contacting you now ever since hours ago? If you are an idiot, you would let yourself believe he really is worried about you. And since when is he on talking basis with your mother? “Why are you not answering, Y/N?! Are you—”

“No, I am not.” You answer tiredly, knowing precisely that he is referring to Jisung’s place. You don’t want to debate him, all you want at the moment to be is alone and cry to your heart content. “I am just.. here. I am going home now, no worries.”

A good minute of silence. “Ah, you’re going home. Okay, good.” He still hesitates. “Text me when you are home.”

“I will. Bye, Taehyung.” 

You are about to press the red button on your phone when the booming voice of him is heard. “No! Wait. This party is boring, I wanna leave. Let me take you home.”

“Taehyung, I am in no way in the mood of dealing with your shit right now.” You curtly sigh, massaging your temple in distress. This persistent boy is surely a pain in the ass. “Talk to me tomorrow.”

Taehyung suddenly lowers his voice to the point of whispering, could probably detect how out of the character you are right now. “Hey, are you okay, sweetheart? You sound sad.”

You are about to say you’re okay, but your head is too heavy with emotions and even lying about being okay stress you out. “I am not. I am not fucking okay. I could arguably be at the worst point of my life. So can you leave me alone?”

“I know where you are. Stay there, I am coming.”

You don’t even know why, or how, or when Taehyung is coming, yet you obliged to his request. Because you don’t know what else to do, or where to go, and even believing in his almost unbelievable request seems appealing to you right now. All because you want to know if he’ll come through or not. That’s how you settle on sitting in front of a closed ice cream shop, holding your legs closer to your chest, your mind wandering to the things you can’t even point out.

Yet against all odds, in just ten minutes of waiting you can detect the black Audi stopping on the side of the street, with Taehyung walking out of it and on your way. You quickly stand up, erasing the remnants of tears on both your sticky cheeks before Taehyung crushes to you, engulfing you inside his arms. His palms caressing the top of your hair, nose buried in your hair, all for you can somehow feel better.

“Why are you sad, Y/N? Something bad happened?” He questions slowly and carefully.

“Yup. Life happened.” You nod, your finger hesitantly intending to reciprocate his hug but you refrain to doing so. There is no good in doing that anymore, especially now. “Everything just.. sucks.”

Taehyung giggles breathily at your sentence, ironically finding mirth in your words. His two thumbs at the either side of your eyes, wiping the leftover tears. “Isn’t that my daily thoughts. Let me take you home, and we can talk on the way?”

On the way to his car, Taehyung securely places his arm around you, squeezing you close to his side before opening the door for you. And before the car is about to move, he ensures your seat belt is strapped and secured well, while all you can do is to stare at him, wondering what the hell is he thinking for doing all these way-over-affectionate acts to you with no surveillance of your parents. 

The words that are directed to ask about the fuck did he mean with all these things are already in the tip of your tongue, but you decide against it. It would be very awkward and presumptuous for you to assume that someone who is literally allergic to relationships is doing that because he has certain feelings for you. Or maybe because you are too scared to find out and get hurt in the end.

“How did you know I’m here?” You question aloofly and he smile.

“Besides being a genius with such great sense? Yup, I heard the ice cream shop advertisement songs when I called you.” He proudly sing-songs like it’s his proudest achievement. You snort, realizing that you indeed a dumb.

“So, what did you do before? I thought you had something to work on.” He casually asks while stealing glances at you, noting your deep silence. “Did you finish your paper?”

“Yeah.” You simply nod, trying to focus on anything else other than looking sideways, to him. “You? Got bored at the party? No girls interesting enough to fuck tonight?”

Taehyung hums in grief, and the coldness washing over your heart is greatly detectable. “Yup. The drink is so-so, the music is boring, the people are boring. You’d start thinking that this party is just too repetitive, you know?” You think you sincerely wished the bitterness on your tone were undetectable, but the fact that Taehyung is utterly insensitive by your sarcastic question bothers you a lot. God, you are such a mess. “So, now that your paper is done, are you busy? We can talk. Or go somewhere else you’d like?”

You look at him, finding the flirty, mischievous smile plastered on his face, but it only adds the feeling of nausea inside your chest. “Do you know Jinyoung? I think he is from engineering too.”

Taehyung nods, a tad bit surprised at your sudden change of topic, yet you continue. “He is my task mate for this paper. And wow… I am really amazed at him.”

“Amazed? Why?”

“So he told me he will propose to his girlfriend tomorrow.” You explain, trying to sound nonchalant. “It’s just amazing, I think. How can someone be sure to marry someone else at such an early age, that he will stay true to just one person and one person only for the rest of his life?”

“What—Seriously? There is still people as naive as that?” Taehyung snickers, and you could feel your heart drop at his vivid disdain at the mention of serious relationship. “Come on, it's the 21st century. People really think anyone can be chained into a monogamous relationship for the rest of their lives? Grow up.”

“He has been in a relationship with her since middle school.”

Taehyung’s eyes are wide as saucers. “And still wanna go through with that? I can see why you said it’s amazing, Y/N.”

“I think alike too.” You curtly sneer, folding your arm on your chest. “He asked me what I thought about it and I encouraged him to go ahead and propose. And do you wanna know why I am sad? Because I’m jealous, Taehyung. Along the way, I have turned too skeptical of love and started losing faith that I’ll have someone like that too. Too tired of actually thinking about who I should date and instead settle for undeserving men. I hate it.”

“Y/N, trust me. I know how men think, especially all these boys. It’s easy to think you can tie them up into a relationship, but it’s like.. a timer, waiting to blow off.” Taehyung stubbornly explains like love is a disease—just the way you expect him to. “It’s like you are waiting for the heartbreak. Please don’t be naive like that.”

“So what if I try and I fail?” The frustration is clear in your tone, irritated that Taehyung exactly sounds like a parent telling their kid Santa doesn’t exist. “That doesn’t mean I’m naive. At least I’m a step closer to finding sincere love, not like you fuckboys that are allergic to have a mutual love and respectful relationship.”

“Y/N, when you are a child of divorce, it is hard to believe that love does exist.” Taehyung intently stares at you, before letting go the breath he has been holding. “It’s not entirely impossible, I know there are some happy marriages too. But how can you guarantee you’re that lucky 1% with the compassionate, dreamy, lovey dovey monogamous relationship you have been worshipping about? It’s unrealistic—and doesn’t make sense.”

“But how can I know if I don’t try?!” You ruffle your hair in frustration, face reddening in anger. “I’d rather try and fail rather than not do anything at all. But you know what? I have no one to blame but myself. I am the one thinking that I might find love in college, filled with pubescent fuckboys. You are right, Taehyung. I should have known in the first place. I have to avoid you—exactly boys like you.”

Taehyung reaches out to you with his right hand, sadness and panic coloring his face. “Hey—hey. I am sorry, Y/N. Please, please don’t be like this. I overstepped it, I know. I—you’ll find it. You’ll love someone that truly loves you too. Don’t be like this, okay? I am sorry.”

Realizing that you have not replied since the fight occurred few minutes ago, Taehyung stops his car on the side of the street, just a few metres from your house. He is now facing you, holding your hand while brushing it against his thumb in regret.

“I am sorry. I was wrong, it... it wasn’t my place to be judgmental about your life choices.” Taehyung is quick to apologize, his large eyes showing nothing but genuineness. “I am just.. Sad. I am sad. You know why Y/N?”

You still are not looking at him, but he continues, even with constricted throat. He is too desperate. “Because I care about you. Seeing you cry, it’s like seeing myself too. I feel awful whenever I see you cry, I think even worse than my own. And the thought of someone breaking your heart? I don’t want to imagine that.” Taehyung whispers, shifting you to face him, eyes locking with a splash of anguish while your heart pounds fast until you can hear it echoes in your ear. 

“I have opened myself to you more than anyone else, and I’d like to think you do likewise. I am comfortable talking to you, and for you to talk to me as well. And to imagine that you have someone else that you will go to whenever you are happy, or sad, or in need of a mere hug—it’s just… it’s making me feel lonely and sad.” The smile on his lips is now painted with a hint of sadness, eyes looking down to his lap. 

“These few weeks with you.. I feel good. I finally, finally feel good about myself, like I’m not alone again. You make me kind of want to protect myself instead of hurting it. That’s a first.” Taehyung shyly chuckles, scratching his nape. Your eyebrows crinkled. What does he mean by that? He likes you, but only as a friend? Do you even want to find out and voluntarily get hurt?

“I just… Can I be selfish, Y/N? At least until you find someone deserving of all your love and attention?”

Instead of answering, you shut him with softly embracing his lips with your own. It doesn’t even need a mere second for Taehyung to respond, his arms are swift in supporting you by the waist, both your arms are secured around his neck. His lips are warm, fluff, and taste just the way you remember—like honey or great whiskey. The kiss is slow paced, nothing like your previous sexual encounters when both of you are just desperate to reach the ultimate peak, but now? You feel how much he savors every second, trying to make you as comfortable as ever with his gesture. As few seconds go by, his tongue has softly embraces yours, until you are left breathless. You softly tug his hair as he moans to the kiss, drunk with the taste of you.

At that time, you despise thinking. You despise the fact that you feel likewise. Too desperate to have him against you, to hold him close, to feel his lips, and you despise hearing the alarm screaming at the back of your head at how dangerous it is—you simply don’t want to stop. Yes, it is as easy as flipping over a hand to know that against every odd, you like him. You like Taehyung, the renowned fuckboy. And you don’t know when, or why. Maybe that one time he waited for you with no certainty and hugged you when you were having a breakdown. Or that time he listened to your story attentively and gave you an encouraging pat on the back. Or that time he picked you up, held you close, gave you flowers and kindly interacted with your parents. Or maybe all of it. You don’t know.

But then a scary realization enters you. You are just about to do it again—the thing you swear you will avoid with all you might. You settle for less. You are about to settle for Taehyung, this amazing, wonderful man who cares about you more deeply than anyone else, but will never go down that road with you. He doesn’t believe in relationships, he will never settle down and label himself for anyone. And this kiss you are sharing with him? Or the hook-ups you might just be this close of doing? That is literally driving you further inside this anonymous yet strong feeling you have for him. It’s doing you harm, and you desperately need to stop

That’s how you forcefully detach yourself for him, giving a thin, forced smile and mutter your goodbye whilst exiting his car. You quickly run to your house without even once looking back, closing the gate behind you while desperately looking up to avoid the tears from raining down on your cheek.

Yes, at least you tried, and now you know. It’s not Taehyung—it will never be him.

===================

You are correct, there is a second part to this that i’ll hopefully post soon! I really hope you like it, and please leave a message in comment and ask box, it would help a lot! thank you for reading, lovelies~

UPDATED : The Platinum Rules (Finale) : Click Here!

#taehyung #taehyung au #taehyung angst #taehyung fluff #bts au #bts fluff #bts angst #bts fuckboy #taehyung fuckboy #bts fake relationship

[strangeradventuresofp]

stay with me (legolas x reader)

a/n : ok so this rly had no direction other than an injury BUT i wanted to write something for my beautiful boy so i hope u like it cus im super nervous about it lol<3333

The battle of Hornburg had left you injured, a great gash occupying your left shoulder. You didn’t remember much of what happened afterwards, only that someone caught your falling, limp body, after slaying the Orc that damaged you. Now, you had awoken, alone in one of the rooms of the residence. A bandage hugged your wound tightly, wrapped with extreme care, it looked almost pretty.

An ache resonated in your chest as you recalled the battle. You were outnumbered; there was no question about that. It was like one man fighting against a hundred. You wondered if everyone was well and -more importantly- alive. One person you wished would be okay the most though, and that was the Mirkwood Prince. Since you had spent so much time with the elf over the years, you had become infatuated with him and he with you. Often you sat together, talking aimlessly about things and although you weren’t an elf, he braided your hair just like his. Sometimes you had attempted to braid his hair, but the intricateness didn’t agree well with your heavy hands. You had ended up pulling his hair a little too harshly and you both thought it better if he stick to the braiding. A rosy hue formed upon both of your cheeks but it was quickly forgotten. Legolas had also taught you archery, he was the reason you used a bow as your main weapon in combat. He and Aragorn taught you how to use a sword and sometimes you got the better of them, which always left Legolas with a proud look.

You pushed yourself up with your good arm, swinging your legs around to hang over the bed, pressing your feet flat on the floor. A cry tore from your dry throat when you felt a sharp pain deep in your shoulder, biting your lip in an attempt to relieve the pain. Unfortunately, you only made your lip pool with blood, swiping some of it away with the back of your hand. Sighing, you looked towards the door and back down to your feet on the floor, willing yourself to get up. A few deep inhales later and you tried again, leaning on your good hand this time.

The door opened as you stood, Aragorn walking through and you gave him a smile.

“I take it the battle was a victory in the end?”

“Why do you think that?”

“We’re alive.” He chuckled at your words and you gently hugged him as he came closer. He wrapped his arms around you, kissing your forehead platonically. “What about Legolas? And Gimli?”

“Both are well.”

“Oh, I may breathe again.” You looked up at him. “And you?” He nodded and you smiled, looking over at your shoulder, grimacing.

“What do you know of it?”

“Not much. I caught you as you fell, sent you back here with another. Forgive me Y/N. I should have brought you here myself.” He mused, earning a chuckle from you whilst you rested your hand on his shoulder.

“There is nothing to forgive, Aragorn.”

The two of you turned towards the door as footsteps approached, two of your friends appearing in the space. Aragorn moved to stand out of the way as Legolas charged forward, an alarmed look on his face. He advanced to you quickly, searching you for any other injuries that may have gone unnoticed. When he found none, his eyes locked with yours, the concern in them never fully dying.

“Does it hurt?”

“Like hell.” You chuckled, taking his hand gently before he brought your combined hands up to rest against his chest.

“I’m glad that you are well, nin mel.”

“As am I.”

~~~

The sun had fallen and you had all retired to the rooms appointed to you the first time you stayed at the Hornburg. Apparently, you were being extremely loud in expressing your frustration of not being able to change your clothes because soon after a knock on the door echoed around your room. Your eyes widened and you quickly pulled either sides of the button up shirt across your chest with your good arm. Watching as someone pushed open the door, you sighed in relief when you saw it was only Legolas.

“Are you okay? I could hear shouting of some sorts.”

“Oh, yes. Just frustrated is all. I can’t seem to do anything with this arm.” A weak chuckle escaped your lips before you sighed and Legolas’ brows knit together.

“What is it you need?”

“Oh, it’s nothing.” The unsatisfied look on his face made you huff, looking to the side as your cheeks heated up. “I can’t seem to work the tie on my shirt.”

“Would you like me to help?”

“No, it’s okay, really.”

“Well then, should I go and fetch Gimli? He’s perfect height and all.” He laughed and you scowled playfully, rolling your eyes.

“Fine, you can help.” You let go of your shirt as he walked over, closing the door behind him first. The fabric exposed the skin of your chest, covering just the right places, falling almost flush to the curve of your breast. His Adam’s apple bobbed in his throat when he stood in front of you, reaching down to touch the fabric that concealed your figure. His fingers were painfully slow in threading the string through itself. It was as if he was purposely taking his time so your bodies could be close, only a few thin layers of cloth separating the two of you. As he finished, his fingers danced down your arms, his hands finding yours, gripping them gently, desperately.

“Legolas—“ The sensation of soft lips pressing themselves against yours drew out your breath from your throat, and you snaked your arms around his neck as he held your waist with a kind yet firm grip. Your lips moved perfectly with each other and for a moment, you truly believed you were in heaven. He gently pulled away, removing one of his hands from your waist, stroking your cheek with the back of his finger.

“You need not speak.”

“But I need—“

“You need rest, nin aenil.” Legolas turned, beginning to take steps towards the door before you spoke.

“Will you stay with me?” He stopped at your words, turning to look at you, giving you a look to check if you were entirely sure. “I want you to be here with me.”

He smiled, watching you as you climbed into your bed, moving over to make room for him. You watched as he shrugged off his shirt, moving towards the bed and lying next to you, pulling the cover over both of you. Both of you lay on your sides, in a comfortable silence, just looking at each other. He was focusing on a part of your hair that he was braiding. You hardly noticed until you looked down, he was as light as a feather in everything that he did. His brows were slightly furrowed from the concentration, and his blue eyes were fixed on the strands of your hair. He looked beautiful.

“I love you.” His eyes immediately flicked over to you and your eyes widened at the realisation of your words. You swallowed, feeling your mouth go dry, heart race increasing from the anxiety. “Forgive me, I did not mean—“ Once again, you were cut off by Legolas’ lips on yours. The worry quickly melted away into the kiss before he pulled away, looking at you with smiling eyes. He didn’t have to say anything. You knew that in that moment, you loved him and he loved you.

my masterlist

#lord of the rings #lotr #lotr frodo #lotr legolas #legolas #the hobbit #hobbit #legolas x reader #x reader #reader insert #my writing #aragorn #lotr gimli #gimli #lotr aragorn #frodo #samwise the brave #legolas thranduilion

[red-hood-redemption]

SO I know I’m like, super late to the party, but I finally got my hands on Robin 2021 and there is literally no one for me to talk to about it so now I’m just screaming my thoughts into the void ✌

First off, before i even bought the first two issues, I read through a lot of other people’s opinions on it to kinda get an idea of where it was going characterization-wise for Damian, and because of all the mixed reactions, I figured I should just read it myself and find out. Now I am the FURTHEST thing from a comic book authority, so like, this is truly just an opinion piece but if it convinces anyone to give the run a chance, then yay!!! Honestly, I’m really glad I gave it a shot because I’m genuinely hooked! I’m actually excited about this series (and it scares me lol)!!!

I'm gonna separate my thoughts into two sections: characters, and story, mainly for my own ease, but also if anyone cares more about one thing or the other it's easier to distinguish. But,  the line is a little blurry so if I end up getting a little too much into the characterization in the story section, just bear with me lmao. OH and I'm going to try and keep this as un-spoilery as possible but we'll just have to see. SOOOOOOOO

Characters

I think it goes without saying that Melnikov's art is absolutely gorgeous, and really does show how much Damian has grown up. It makes me want to sob its so beautiful, everyone is so pretty, even the guy that looks like a washed up, high as fuck Tony Stark lmao. But moving on to the actual characters,

Rose Wilson

I honestly don't know too much about Rose, I haven't read enough about her to say anything about her characterization and how it compares to her other appearances, or whether or not she is OOC, but so far, I'm enjoying her taking up the "big sis" role, like, immediately lmao.

I don't know how much I trust her yet, but I definitely get the vibe that even if she does betray Dami in any way, she's probably gonna stick her neck out for Dami again and he's probably gonna do the same.

I'm really intrigued about her motivations for being here. Obviously, Respawn has something to do with it, but I want to know what's up with that. I've seen a lot of theories and I'm so excited. Also side note, that Black Swan chick is hot, and I can't wait to see more of her in action!!!

I feel like Ravager knows a WHOLE lot more than Dami does about the interesting things going on on the island, mainly because she's been doing a lot more sitting and waiting than he has as of yet, but I'm hoping to see more of the two of them doing detective-y sleuthing together. We love a mysteryyyy

Flatline

Okay but real talk, why does she look like a character straight out of Monster High

Honestly tho, I dig it. It's cute! She's cute! She isn't annoying (yet) but I don't know if I care too much about her other than she would make a cute friend for Dami.

I think the problem with DC is that they know people LOVE Harley Quinn and they try so hard to make characters just like her but it always falls short, so honestly I am a little wary of her character development in this run, but I'm willing to give her a shot since her little coffin purse on the cover of the second issue is so damn cute. I'm a slut for character design, okay?

Oh speaking of Flatline and Dami, I don't ship it and I don't want them to force a romantic relationship into Damian's "coming of age"/"soul-searching" moment okay? Because that's what this run is about, at least to me! More on that in the story section!

They're literally 13/14 years old. That's 8th-9th grade, babes lets think about that for a minute

Also let's stop the whole "lets introduce a female character just to make her a love interest!" bullshit okay?

Basically, Flatline is interesting, or at least has the potential to be, but I don't want to get my hopes up because DC is notorious for disservicing their female characters 😕

I think the mixed reaction to her is valid, I don't think she's had much time to make a solid impression yet, so I guess you'd have to read it for yourself. Personally, I don't understand why people immediately hate her, especially because she's like, 14, and what kid that age isn't annoying? like at least a little bit lmao! But, yeah. I don't trust her either but literally everyone on this island is sketchy at least and a murderer at best, so hey 🤷‍♀️

Damian

His new outfit lmaoooo at first I was like "WHaT is this child wearing? You'd think Dick would have rubbed off on him and taught him what good taste looks like" but then I saw the later outfit, with the gold patterning and those sleeeevessssss ugh and I take it all back. A Fashion Icon TM. Truly stunning. A sight to behold. So proud, look at him go 😪

I think there's a lot of different opinions on Damian's characterization in this run, and I can definitely see where its coming from, but I disagree with the notion that Damian has been done dirty and reverted to a blood-thirsty, feral child.  And I have a LOT of opinions on the whole "feral" thing regarding Damian period (but that's for another time).

I don't think of Dami's rampage as a regression for his character. He's letting of emotions right then and I think its very similar to him venting. Its just not verbal, its physical and he knows he's not going to have to grapple with the consequences of his actions on the first kill. He knows he's technically not doing anything wrong.

He is clearly upset at Bruce and his failure to protect Alfred, and while Dami and Bruce are really often described as being very similar personality-wise, they are still distinctly different individuals who came to their current moral codes in vastly different ways. Bruce came to his "no killing" rule on his own; he made that decision for himself. It wasn't taught to him, it was a moment-of-truth kind of situation. Damian, on the other hand is in a vastly different situation.

Dami is, I think, at the beginning of the climb to his own moment-of-truth. He is in his rebellious phase like Dick, where he's gone off to spread his wings. It's not his conscious intention (at least that's not the vibe I got from reading the first two issues), but its directly underlying his "mission".

Damian is growing out of the expectations of his parents and into his own person. We all know he's been thrown from one moral code to another, both drastically different from each other. I don't think its a regression for him to lose his way a little, because realistically, he's going to have to in order to find it, specifically a moral compass that he forged on his own. He's just what? 14? Like hell a kid his age wants to listen to any form of authority. He's as stubborn as it comes. Damian needs to come to his decision regarding the path he takes in life on his own. It can't be made for him. He's seen and lived both sides of the coin, and I don't think he should be forced just yet to choose a side or pave a middle ground, but I do think that he should get the opportunity to see and experience all the gray areas on his own.

I think I'll transition from characterization to story here, because let's face it, this story is about Damian dealing with his confused emotions right now, in the wake of losing Alfred, a man that kind of acted like a grounding presence, a voice of reason, or a moral compass for him (and honestly Bruce and the rest of the bat crew if we're honest).

Story

So there's a lottttt going on in the story that is really enticing and exciting, and I'm really interested to see how it all plays out.

All the rules to the tournament are so, sketchy? Like they don't sound like they are meant to be sketchy, its basic safety and guidelines or whatever but with all the glowy green shit and the stakes of the tournament? Yeah, you can bet your ass its the "no fighting at night" and other shit is gonna be broken, and that's likely when the fun begins *insert evil laughter*😈

I was slightly put off by the whole "let me teach you to have fun" thing with Rose, because it's not like Dick, Steph, Jon, and like the Titans haven't done that with him too, but eh, not something I'm too concerned about. It's definitely just a segway to get us introduced to more characters that might become Damian's friends which will be interesting considering what Mother Soul said about fraternizing.

And that's another thing! I want Damian to make some friends! I know he already has some, but here's the thing: I think he's already been struggling with belonging, and he's definitely been feeling the disconnect between his life and other kids', whether they're supers/vigilantes or not. I think it'd be nice to see Dami have the experience of meeting people who he at first thinks are just like him!! and then realizing that maybe he doesn't really fit in here either, and that it's okay to feel like you don't belong, as isolating as it may feel at times. It just means you have a set of values. I want him to realize that its not always a bad thing, and you learn more about yourself and your own heart this way.

And from there,,, lets talk about the thing that stuck out to me the most in these two issues! GUILT!! It's mentioned SOO many times already, and I think its going to be a really fun, heartbreaking, and interesting aspect to explore about Damian. Is it guilt about his actions? Leaving behind family? Not being able to save Alfred? Not being a perfect example of Robin? He may call himself Robin but he doesn't sport the OG look or symbol like before. I love that his guilt takes on the form of Alfred though, or at least his conscious. I think it'd be really interesting to see this conscious disappear when Dami strays too far from his center, and when he finds it again, it reappears.

I really think that seeing Damian's actions in this run as a failure of character development is an unfair assessment, though. You can't do everything right in order to grow! You have to screw up, lose your way, experiment with life to find your fit, right?

Something tells me he doesn’t care for the tournament itself, but the end result, and the people behind it and more about WHY it was hidden from him. I mean he finds out the tournament TRULY begins once everyone has died once and tHEN he kill everyone? Felt to me less like a “killing spree” as everyone put it to a calculated decision to get the tournament going. He literally cuts Mother Soul off in the middle of her speaking to start fighting at the beginning

Anyway, just my thoughts lol. I do have some issues with the past two issues, and I might make a separate post about that, but honestly not enough for me to dislike Robin 2021 so far. I mean, besides the very obvious white-washing in the second issue, because DC can absolutely do better. And they should. It’s like they thought we wouldn’t notice???? But besides that, story and characterization-wise I’m looking forward to more. Here’s to hoping it stays that way, just with a better colorist!

#dc comics #robin 2021 #damian wayne #robin

[densi-mber]

Paramnesia

A/N: For today’s prompt. This particular scenario was suggested by @mashmaiden. Set in early season 4.

***

“Agent Blye?”

Kensi groaned, pushing at the hand tapping her shoulder.

“Agent Blye, can you hear me?” the voice said more insistently.

“Where am I?” she mumbled, just barely able to open her eyes. Even that made her head pound.

“You’re in the hospital, ma’am,” the man explained. “I’m Nurse Jackson. I noticed you were waking up a few minutes ago.” Kensi gave the barest of nods, becoming increasingly confused. She didn’t remember scheduling any procedure. Actually, she couldn’t remember much of anything.

“What happened to me?” Lifting her hand, she frowned at the needle inserted in the back of her hand.

“Your vehicle crashed and turned over in a ditch this morning. You suffered a head injury, but your doctor can tell you more about that when you’re a little more settled.”

“Am I going to die?” she asked, squinting up at the nurse. Something started beeping loudly and he gently grabbed her hand.

“No, ma’am, the injury was not that severe. Please calm down.” She tried to take a couple breaths, instinctually knowing that she wouldn’t like the results if she couldn’t calm down on her own. When the monitor stopped beeping, Nurse Jackson added, “Your partner will be back soon. He had to step away to make a call.”

“My partner,” she mumbled. She didn’t remember having a partner either.

“Yes, Marty Deeks. He brought you in.” He checked her IV, glancing at her a couple times. “I’m going give you a dose of pain medication and I’ll let your doctor now you’re awake.”

Laying back down, she tried to force herself to remember something, repeating the name Marty Deeks in her mind until she felt calmer. A few minutes later, the door opened again.

“Oh my god, I’m so glad you’re awake,” said the man who walked through. He was tall with messy blonde hair that curled around his ears and a wide mouth that was currently narrowed with worry. Kensi felt something flutter in the pit of her stomach at the sound of his voice. As he drew closer, she noticed some blood smeared across his forehead.

He hesitated for a moment and then bent to hug her, the fluttering feeling increased and she wrapped her free arm around his neck. This was obviously Marty. It felt good, comforting to be in his arms.

“The nurse said we were in an accident,” she said, pushing herself up higher in the bed. She must have guessed right that he was there too because he nodded, his expression turning worried once more.

“Yeah, you don’t remember it?”

“Some of my memories are a little foggy,” Kensi hedged. She grabbed his hand and his eyes flew down to their linked fingers. “But my head barely hurts.” That was a bald-faced lie. “Can you get me out of here?”

“I don’t know, the doctor-“

“Please, Marty.” He arched an eyebrow at that and he shook his head, allowing a tiny smirk.

“You’re super cute when you beg Kensalina, but I think they’ll want to keep you for a while for observation. It was a pretty bad crash.”

“I just want to go home.,” Kensi murmured, pressing his hand to her lips.

“Ok, yeah, wow. Apparently that TBI made you a lot more affectionate that usual,” he said, his cheeks flushing just a little. It was pretty adorable.

“What, I’m not always affectionate with my husband?” she teased, looking right up into his gorgeous blue eyes. It felt normal, easy, and took away some of her discomfort at having absolutely no idea who this guy was.

“Husband?” He chuckled, turning away slightly before he rubbed his jaw. “Ok, yes, I’m definitely your husband. I uh, I want to talk to your doctor...about getting you released. Don’t go anywhere.”

He returned about five minutes later with the doctor in tow. While Marty stood in the background, the doctor, who introduced herself as Doctor Martinez, gave Kensi an amnesia test. At first it took her longer than she was proud of to come up with the simple answers to questions about the date and time, but then they became progressively easier as more information returned to her.

She even started to remember more about Marty.

The only things she couldn’t seem to remember were what happened directly before and after the accident. Dr. Martinez didn’t seem particularly worried about that and since she didn’t ask any questions about her personal life, Kensi didn’t volunteer the information.

“So, what does this mean?” Deeks asked, rubbing at his bottom lip. Kensi had noticed he had a habit of running his fingers through his hair, which made it even messier.

At some point during the exam, he’d taken her hand again. She was grateful for the support and didn’t mind the feel of his warm fingers gripping hers. “Is Kensi going to be alright? Does she need to stay in the hospital?”

“I want to look at her CT scan again, but I think she should be alright to go home,” Dr. Martinez said. “As long as she has someone to watch her the first couple days and nights for any changes.”

“Marty will be with me,” Kensi said, glancing up at him with a small smile. His own smile looked kind of odd, but she didn’t worry about it too much. She trusted him.

“Well, in that case, I’ll be fine with releasing you. And Mr. Deeks, her memory should return in a few days to a couple weeks. It’s an encouraging sign that her amnesia is already resolving.”

“Babe, can you take care of the paperwork?” The words sounded a little strange coming from her mouth, but she shook it off. Everything felt a little strange right now. Marty didn’t immediately answer, so she touched his stomach lightly to get his attention. He jerked, his eyes widening in surprise. “You’ll take care of the paperwork, right?”

“Uh sure, I’ll get started on that,” he muttered. She tipped her chin up expectantly and after a moment of hesitation, he leaned in and kissed her forehead.

***

“So, uh, what exactly do you remember about us?” Deeks asked as casually as he could, flicking a quick look at Kensi. She was propped up in the passenger seat with a couple of pillows, but other than the small bandage at her hair line, she didn’t seem that much worse for wear.

Oh, except for the fact that she apparently thought they were married. He wasn’t sure what had led her to believe that were in a relationship at all, but he hadn’t figured out a way to break the truth to her yet.

“We work together,” she began slowly, looking at him for confirmation, “at NCIS.”

“That’s right.” At least that was a start. Maybe with enough gentle leading, she would realize the truth.

“We met when when we were both undercover at a gym. We didn’t get along very well at first, but then we started working as partners.” She paused and glanced at him, her smile turning reminiscent.

“I think you thought I was pretty annoying and kind of idiot when we first met,” Deeks said, smirking at his own expense. “Still do sometimes to be honest.”

“Mm, but I love you anyway,” Kensi commented drowsily, reaching across the consul to run her fingers over his cheek. A shiver ran down his spine at the simple touch combined with her soft, almost dreamy expression . He wasn’t used to her touching him this much when it wasn’t followed by a sarcastic comment or the promise of violence.

“Uh...here we’re are.” He pulled into her driveway, and parked, grabbing her bag from the back and then helping her out. When he offered her his arm, she wrapped her arm around his neck instead, obviously expecting him to pick her up.

After a little fumbling, he had one arm around her waist and the other under her knees. Kensi once again didn’t seem to notice his discomfort and laid her head on his shoulder, sighing.

“How do you feel?” he asked.

“My head hurts,” she mumbled. “And my back is kind of sore too. Maybe you can rub it for me.”

“Sure.” Deeks huffed out a laugh. God, this was like all his dreams come true but in totally the wrong way. He used the spare house key Kensi had given him a couple years ago for emergencies and carried her straight to her bedroom.

Despite their usual lack of boundaries and the number of times he’d hung out at her apartment, he rarely set foot inside her room. It was an unspoken line that neither of them was willing to cross, a sign of intimacy, which was now being completely trampled.

He set her on the bed and then grabbed a t-shirt and a pair of sweats from a pile by the door. Before she could ask for help with changing, he told her,

“I’m gonna check in with Hetty and let her know how you’re doing.”

“But you’re not leaving, right?” She checked, grabbing for his hand.

“Of course not,” he assured her, crouching down in front of her. “What if you tripped over a pile of clothes on your way to get a late night snack? I’d never forgive myself.”

“Shut up. And I promised I clean up the mess this weekend,” she said, rolling her eyes. “As soon as we get a break from work.”

“Kensi, I’m not going to let you clean anything while you have a concussion.” He started to stand again, but Kensi leaned forward, hugging him tightly.

“Thank you for taking such good care of me.” She dipped her head and he didn’t move as she gently kissed him. It was just a brush of lips, less than the kiss they shared while undercover. Somehow it was so much more. Clearing his throat noisily, he untangled her arms, and rushed into the living room, not caring if Kensi thought it was strange.

He quickly updated Hetty on Kensi’s status. Hetty gave him the rest of the day off without him even asking with instructions to take good care of “Ms. Blye”. He felt a twinge of guilt at that, but didn’t mention anything about Kensi’s memory lapse. The team would figure that out soon enough.

When he hung up, he fixed Kensi a bowl of soup and a small sandwich, remembering she hadn’t eaten since early that morning.

“Hey, I made you some food.” he said quietly as he walked back into her room with a tray balanced on one hand. Kensi was curled up in bed looking way too soft and drowsy-eyed for her own good. “I couldn’t find any twinkies or peanut butter cups, so it’s just plain old tomato basil.”

“I’m not hungry,” she said. He didn’t think that was a particularly good sign, but set the food to the side and crouched in front of her again. Just to be at eye level, he told himself.

“Ok, do you need anything else?” Kensi slid a hand out from under the covers and clumsily cupped his cheek.

“Just you.”

***

A/N: I played this like Kensi was remembering some bits from when they were undercover in Neighborhood Watch. And yes, there will be a part 2.

As always, I am not a medical expert or professional. Although I do try to do some research, this is just for fun and there’s bound to be some mistakes.

#densimber 2020 #densimber 4.0 #densi #ncis la fanfiction #densimber day 26 #light whump #by ejzah

[roseyful]

Mars Red: Edge of the Nightmare - Review

Now, my Tumblr has been a bit quiet lately (been queuing a lot of things so then it wasn’t too quiet during my absence), but it has been for a good reason; last month I was approached [on my private twitter account] and asked if I would be able to playtest a game and write a review, and of course, being someone that enjoys games, especially those that follow an otome style, I had to say YES.

So its proud to say that after a while of playing the game, I finally get to write this review.

Now before I get into the game itself, I would like to take the moment to give appreciation to the team for being so helpful during my time of playtesting the game and before that, as not only would they let us know when there was an issue and the date had to be pushed back, they were so polite and helpful whenever I would run into a problem. That’s something you’d want to see in a gaming company and I’m so glad that my first experience with this company is one with positive results. I personally found no issues with the team themselves, and I do hope they keep this up after the release. Thank you favary for being so lovely and patient with me, and other beta testers.

Mars Red: Edge of The Nightmare was the game that they asked for me to play, however when I originally looked at their website, I couldn’t help but notice that the concept was originally one of a ‘Sound Theatre’, and while I couldn’t figure out what that was, I eventually was lead down a rabbit hole and ended up looking at the other things that Bun-O Fujisawa has worked in. Very interesting stuff, just like the game. However, it’s best to look at his other stuff in your own time.

Please note: I will be keeping this spoiler-free for the sake of letting people go in with no idea of what’s going on besides what I mention and on the website.

Story

The game is set in the early twentieth century in Japan, or better known as the Taisho, in which the website also says ‘[is] influenced by Romanticism’, in which vampires rule the night, as they could only feed off blood and those that stepped into the sun would surely die. Keen senses, incredible physical abilities, and yet they were still vulnerable. You see that very early on with the main character that we play as; Yutsufusa Yuki, a vampire whom became one against his will.

I will be honest, I did not like Yutsufusa when I first started playing, as I felt like he was a bit too willing to die, but that is something that you can overlook when you get further into the story. Yutsufusa is obviously one of the youngest in the group, due to the fact he wears the more ‘modern’ [at the time] clothing out of everyone, well, there is someone else who wears similar clothing but he’s human.

You control Yutsufusa throughout the game, influencing his voices and living his life through his eyes, him acting as the reader insert as you learn about the other characters and begin to grow a bond with them. While the story is a bit slow at first, it does start picking up around the middle-end of chapter 1 and the beginning of chapter 2 after you play the prologue, as you begin to assist “Code Zero” in their work to rid the world of vampires that wish to feast on humans..

Be mindful that there is an anime, however, Yutsufusa does not appear in it, as it focuses on the other main characters, so if you have watched the anime already be sure to remember that they’re either two separate timelines or different points in time. I do not want to confuse anyone with this.

The main cast is quite an interesting bunch, as it covers a wide range of personalities, and sometimes even time periods as you play through the game and unlock things; you might say you might learn a bit of history from it if you end up looking up some of the references I’ve found in the game. This is a great reflection on the idea of ‘immortality, and even has moments where said immortality leans into a few jokes (such as knowledge of birds).

If you’ve played games such as ‘Ikemen Revolution’, you may be familiar with the ticket system. Every day you’re allowed a certain amount of tickets to progress through the story, however, if you run out of tickets and you must read more, then you’re able to progress the story via using ‘amber’, the game’s currency that you can use for different functions. However, this is not needed, as every day your tickets will be replenished. I personally found myself not even needing to use my amber, as I would always wait for the next day. There are mini-stories that you can get if you finish a chapter within a certain amount of time, but I personally don’t find them to progress the story a lot after I read the first one I got. Then again I had other things to occupy my time while I wanted as well. If you wish to reread chapters, you get a bonus third option of currency; coins. Coins can be used to reread chapters in the place of amber or tickets, which means that you can grind out coins via the exploration option in order to see more options (looked at a bit later).

I personally found the story to be engaging, between the use of minigames (or investigations, covered a bit later), it broke up the reading with fun activities that progressed the story.

Is the game an Otome?

No! I was shocked as well when I saw the all-male cast since I was wondering if I was playing a boys love game, but in the end, I was pleasantly surprised to find out that this is actually a detective game. While it may carry the usual look of an otome, with the story and choices of how you speak influencing the endings of chapters, the game more feels like one of finding new friends and solving kick-ass investigations than finding romance. It’s refreshing.

This is especially true between the minigames in which helps influence the story that is all very unique in their own way and do not seem repetitive once you get into the flow of how they work.

Minigames

The minigames come forward in two forms; investigation, interrogation, and infer. Investigation sounds exactly how you’d expect, as you have to poke around and look at things, which you can review in a little notebook that sits in the top right of your screen in the case you need to review what you’ve looked at. When I was first launched into this section for the first time, I had a little trouble remembering exactly what I needed to look at (as I was given a set of things to tap), however, I do have to thank the team for thinking ahead and adding the option to be able to watch ads in order to see what you need to do. This was one of the two times I’d have to watch ads, as they don’t shove them in your face every few seconds like most mobile games do which is rather nice. Sometimes you gain information or items that you have to use later, so it’s a good idea to keep track of what you look at.

Interrogation acts as a question-based information gathering, in which you talk to NPCs in order to gather information to use in the investigation. Like Investigation, these points are put into your notebook for later.

Infer takes the first two investigation segments and combines the information, as you now get interrogated by one of the main characters, and you must respond back with the proper information in order to make sure that this segment is successful. You are able to read back on the notes from the other segments at this point by pressing the button with the book icon in the upper right corner, as this aids you in selecting the right answers. When I first came to this section, I did feel under pressure due to it, but it was interesting to see the negative answers from the character if I got it wrong.

Exploration is another part of the game, that while outside the story, there are parts that require a certain amount of story points in order to clear ‘point blocks’. This is where you get the coins from and frankly is good to use once you have finished using all your tickets for the day and want to use the rest of the time to grind coins. During the exploration, you set up 2 characters, a place, and a set [in real life] time of how long you want them to be out and about. Depending on the number of points earned, you may earn something called a ‘mummer’, which reveals more about the characters you chose to send out, and even get dialogue of the characters interactions (which can be pretty funny in itself) that shows the dynamic of the two characters- are they friends? Are things tense? You get to learn more by sending them out together.

Artstyle

As an artist, I was incredibly pleased with the art of the game, as the characters do not look the game, there are different body types and ages (from teen to elder), you never had to look at the same face twice for two characters. I will be honest, I do wish the characters were a bit more ‘animated’ with their expressions (such as body movement when they’re feeling certain emotions), however other than that, the sprites are magnificent.

The backgrounds are also really interesting to look at and even tell so much story before you even start investigating within the investigation sections. The design team also needs props, because while a few characters are wearing similar outfits, they’re all wearing them in different ways which shows their character and even the way they probably fight. Though I will say I am a bit biased towards Takeuchi, then again, I really enjoy fun and loud characters in general, and his hair is interesting in a sea of mostly black, purple, silver or blonde hair. Maybe will make a fanart of him in the future if I learn to draw his eyepiece. (on that note, please release the full sprites for us artists to reference, we’d love you eternally for it haha).

Oh no, it’s a-

Yes, its a bit of a gacha game, however, you do not need to actually play the gachas in order to progress through the game; it mostly just unlocks bits of story for those that want to have extra stories, or just want that extra dose of dopamine (haha, me). As someone who plays gacha games ever since they turned 13, I was glad that this game isn’t actually gacha centric, and thus is very free-to-play friendly due to this.

Who would I recommend this for and would I recommend it myself?

Personally, I think this is a game that suits the niche of those that enjoy a good mystery and even play those ‘find an item’ games, mixed in with those that enjoy reading otomes and history. Maybe even someone that enjoys theatre since there’s a character that does theatre. Would I personally recommend it? Yes, I would. The game is very interesting and engaging, the staff behind the game are so lovely.

Once more, here’s the game’s website link ❤️: https://marsred-game.net/en/

#Mars Red #Mars Red: Edge of The Nightmare #otome #game review #otome review #mobile game #mobile otome

[jimlingss]

Sugar and Coffee [7]

Chapter 6 - Chapter 7 - Chapter 7.5 OR Chapter 8

➜ Words: 2.7k

➜ Genres: 99.5% Fluff, 0.5% Angst, Pâtisserie school!AU

➜ Summary: It isn't hard to be a pâtisserie chef, but it's not a piece of cake either. It seems like for you in particular, life keeps throwing in one wrench after another. It always finds ways to make your sweets bitter. The cherry on top is Jeon Jungkook — a rival with a sensitive sweet tooth who always finds ways to complain about you.

cr.

You thought about it over Winter break.   While baking and laying around your dorm room, you’ve come to a self-revelation. You spent only a week in Jungkook’s hometown before coming back for the other two, not wanting to intrude on his family too much, and during that time, you’ve re-discovered a strengthened will. You’ve decided to abandon your unproductive heartache in favour of nurturing a new ambition, a new eagerness to flourish and thrive, and make the most out of your time here.   And Jungkook is surprised to see this fresh enthusiasm.   “You’re here early.” He steps into the kitchen to see you crouched over the counter with notebooks and textbooks sprawled out, already studying at the beginning of the semester.   “I know.” You lift your head to grin at him. “Just thought I’d get a head start. Don’t slack just cause we’re in the same class, Jeon. I won’t always give you notes when you skip.”   He approaches with a small smile. “I’m guessing the rest of your Winter break was good.”   “It was alright. It’s nice to sleep in. How was yours?”   “Lia and Eunbi kept crying when you left. I swear my family likes you more than they like me.”   “Naturally,” you taunt while batting your lashes. “I’m just so likable.”   “Uh-huh.” But that still doesn’t explain why you’re humming and smiling to yourself. It’s only eight in the morning and he wonders where the usual Little Miss Cranky went. “Did something good happen?”   “What do you mean?”   “You’re giggling to yourself.”   “I’m not giggling.” You feign a glare. “I’ve just...found new motivation to work harder. I thought about it a lot and….”   “And?”   “I’m going to get back with Seokjin,” you declare. Jungkook’s eyes are wide and you smile. “I’m going to catch up and become someone worthy of him. Someone he won’t be able to let go. I’m going to work my hardest, so he can be proud of me.”   “Huh.” The boy nods. “Well, good for you.”   “Psh, what’s with the bland response. Listen, you better look out, Jeon. I’m going to make the best portfolio ever to submit at the end of the semester.”   He grins. “Okay.”   You return to your work, finishing up reading the section while humming to yourself.    Jungkook glad you found a new vigour to strive and do your best — but he can’t help feeling unsure of your reasoning. He’s pretty sure that this isn’t it.   //   The lectures and hands-on workshops at the very start of the semester are always the blandest. Introductions are done, course outlines are looked at, and the professor drones on and on about the course’s expectations and what the assignments and examinations will look like. Jungkook isn’t exactly enthused to hear what he’ll have to get done in the coming weeks.   And it’s in this very boredom that he knows he doesn’t need to say anything about your new-found determination. Eventually class will wear you down like it does for everyone, and you’ll become indifferent again. You’ll come to your senses one way or another.   But to his surprise, you’re still very much jolly after classes.   “It hasn’t been one day and classes are already fucking me in the ass,” Taehyung groans.   “Hey, guys!” You plop down with Jungkook beside you. “I missed you. How was Christmas break?”   “It was good.” Hoseok looks up, appearing utterly exhausted with dark circles lining the area beneath his eyes.    Yoongi actively glares at you. “You’re chirpy.”   Much to his dismay, you laugh. If Yoongi was a dog, he’d probably bite you.   Jimin smiles. “Did something good happen, Y/N?”   “Actually, yeah. I just realized some things over the break and I just have more motivation to work hard, you know?”   “Can you give me some of that motivation?” Taehyung groans. “What does it take?”   “A fear of flunking and getting kicked out should be more than enough motivation,” Yoongi deadpans.   “What’s your motivation, Y/N?” Hoseok asks, the corner of his mouth curling.   “I…” You glance at Jungkook, not sure if you should tell them the truth. But after a moment of hesitation, you go for it. There’s nothing to hide. “I’m going to try to get back together with Jin.”   At once, you receive mixed reaction — Jimin goes blank, Taehyung lifts his head off to the table and Hoseok’s brows are raised, lips tight. He’s the one who breaks the silence. “Wow, that’s great, Y/N.”   You grin. “I know, right?”   “How are you going to do that?” Taehyung looks at you. “If I can ask…”   “I’m going to improve myself and become someone he wants, someone worth him.”   “But is it really up for you to decide?” Yoongi asks out of the blue, piping up as he chews some chicken in his cheek. The black-haired man looks at you lazily. “It takes two.”   “Yeah, but I can try, right?” You shrug your shoulders, wearing a small smile.   But Yoongi doesn’t accept what he hears, not in the way you want him to. “He dumped you, didn’t he? What makes you think he’ll want you back?”   “I—”   Taehyung steps in before the situation can escalate. “Yoongi.”   But the tired man ignores him, his eyes piercing, even if he gazes at you languidly. “You think you can change him or change what happened?”   “I love him.” Your eyes are glossy and there’s an overwhelming urge to block out your ears.   Yet Yoongi scoffs. “Okay. So what? Who says you won’t be dumped again?”   “Yoongi, chill it, dude,” Taehyung intervenes and Hoseok is also alert, trying to change the topic to no avail. In the meanwhile, Jimin is caught in the conflict and rendered speechless, but what hurts most is that Jungkook doesn’t defend you. He doesn’t utter a single word of support.   “Is it so bad to want him back?”   “Yeah. If he doesn’t want you back.” He shrugs. “It would be more productive if you get on with your life, got better and showed him what he missed out on. Trying to get back together with him makes you look desperate.”   “I never asked for your opinion, Yoongi.”   “Fair, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t hear what I have to say. Plus, I’m just asking you questions and as of yet, I haven’t heard any answers, Y/N,” Yoongi bites back. It’s not like the friendly banter that you have with Jungkook. What Yoongi says is painful to hear, heavy on your heart. It’s argumentative with intentions to prove himself right, confrontational in a way you’ve always avoided. “Why are you setting yourself up to be hurt again? Don’t you think you deserve better than that?”   The group falls into strained silence. The tension wraps itself around your throat, robbing your breath from your lungs. Nothing is spoken, no one utters a word. They stare at you as if they’re waiting for a response, for your justifications. But they don’t need to hear it — it’ll sound like a broken record.   They’ll never don’t get it — how much you love Seokjin. How much you miss him. How much you want him back in your life. Someone who used to be your best friend, who was your entire world, your person, and how he’s turned into a complete stranger.   “Alright, guys. Let’s just agree to disagree, okay?” Taehyung laughs stiffly, trying to dial it back. But you abruptly stand, grabbing your tray of food.   “Y/N.” Jungkook grabs your arm before you can walk away.   You don’t face him. “I have some stuff to do. Catch you guys later.” After dumping the tray, you walk out of the building before they can see the tears in your eyes. And they watch your backside until you’ve disappeared from the dining center.   “You’ve really done it now,” Hoseok chides Yoongi.   The male shrugs. “Was I wrong? She needed to hear it from someone and apparently I’m the only one willing to be the bad guy.”   //   You continue to march across campus with no destination in mind, merely attempting to find some peace and quiet. You tear open the door to the west wing, sniffling as your breath heaves, and at your hasty pace, you fail to notice another person walking in the opposite direction until your shoulders collide with one another.   “S-Sorry.”   The rounded, short girl regards you with bright eyes, wearing a white apron and jeans. “It’s okay—oh, Y/N, right?”    “Do I….know you?”   “I’m Yoo Aeri. We met each other on orientation day, remember?”   “Oh my god.” It was four months ago, but you can vaguely recall the first person you befriended. You were so happy that you met someone friendly that you told Seokjin right away, even if you forgot to exchange contact information. “I remember now. I’m so sorry I forgot, my mind lately is just…”   She laughs. “Don’t worry about it. I actually switched into the culinary program recently.”   “Oh, really? That’s super cool. I heard it was hard.”   “It is a little, but the Baking and Pastry Arts program is a lot more competitive. I just found it wasn’t for me.”   “I know what you mean. I can get pretty tough.”   Aeri smiles and you realize she’s holding a plastic wrapped plate when she thrusts it towards you. “I’m actually walking around right now to see if someone wants to eat this — It’s seared salmon I made in class, but I made too much. As usual. Do you want to have lunch with me?”   You’ve never had such a proposition before. “I’d love to.”   //   8:12 pm. Jungkook: is the plan still on?   Every so often when Jungkook’s sick of you complaining about the vile food at the dining hall, the both of you go out to grab a bite to eat off-campus. His wallet cries but he has to admit that it’s fun.   Tonight though, you haven’t knocked on his dorm room yet and he hasn’t been in contact with you since lunch. Jungkook wonders passingly if you’ve permanently ghosted him — if so, he doesn’t know why he’s being punished for Yoongi’s actions.   8:14 pm. Y/N: oh yeah sorry 8:14 pm. Y/N: not tonight   The moment he gets the message, his brows shoot to his hairline. Jungkook audibly groans.    You should’ve told him sooner. He can’t get a good meal in the dining center when it closes in just fifteen minutes. But Jungkook wonders if you’re underneath your covers crying, if you’re really that weak willed to be broken down so easily by a few words from Yoongi, but then—   8:16 pm. Y/N: made a new friend   Wow. So you ditched his ass for someone else — now Jungkook has zero sympathy for you.   With the annoyance of a lifetime, he grabs his coat and decides to go out anyways. He doesn’t need you. He can enjoy a perfectly good meal off-campus by himself.   It takes Jungkook fifteen minutes by bus to get to the bustling street. He enters the cozy pizza restaurant down the block that you’ve both gone to a few times and orders takeout. He waits at the front playing a game on his phone to pass the time, hoping he can get home soon and enjoy the food in the comfort of his own bed.   But Jungkook’s ears perk when it catches loud voices that draw his attention. He naturally lifts his head. It’s a mistake.   He can’t even act that he doesn’t know them, that he didn’t see them, not when his eyes connect directly with Jin’s and they look at each other.   Yet, to Jungkook’s surprise, the older man stops with a smile. “Hey!”   The best way to describe his relationship with Seokjin was that they are acquaintances — similar to how he would’ve called you, excluding the recent months. Jungkook knows Jin from high school, saw him in the halls but they seldom spoke to each other. They hear things about one another but that’s the furthest extent of their interactions.   Until now.   “Are you here alone?”   “Yeah I’m just grabbing some takeout.” Jungkook awkwardly hitches a thumb over his shoulder.   Seokjin nods, plump lips naturally pouted. “Were you in the area?”   “Not really. I came from school.”   “Oh, that’s actually pretty far. I’m surprised you didn’t just do delivery.”   Jungkook’s doe eyes double. He feels like an idiot. “Oh shit, actually?! I didn’t know they had delivery!” He could’ve saved himself half an hour.   Seokjin grins. “Yeah, but it costs an extra two dollars.”   “Guess I’m saving money then.” He feels bitter. Sincerely, you are the curse of his life. Jungkook would’ve never been in this situation if he didn’t feel a need to imaginarily prove you wrong in his mind.   “Jin!” One of his male friends calls out, signaling him over as the waitress shows the rest of his friends to a table.   “I’ll be there in a minute.”   Jungkook can kind of understand the sad state you were in after the breakup. Aside from Seokjin’s handsomeness that even renders Jungkook speechless at some angles, it’s evident that Jin has a good personality. He’s friendly and warm, despite being an acquaintance. And Jin never once treated him poorly even back when he had his feud with you.   “Want to step outside for a minute?” Jungkook asks. “It’s kind of loud in here.”   “Sure.”   The two of them exit the restaurant and become enveloped in the chilly air. It is quiet out here, almost too quiet. They can finally hear each other properly but Jungkook finds his thoughts are deafeningly loud.    “So, what did you end up ordering?”   “Three sausage and two pepperoni.” Jungkook’s fond of the way you always call him a meathead as he stuffs his face with it. “It’s my favourite.”   “Oh really? I’m more of a pineapple man, myself.”   “I’ll admit, I hated pineapple myself until Y/N changed my mind.”   Seokjin grins. “She did for me too. How is she, by the way?”   “She’s...fine. Enough to drive me crazy.” Jungkook sighs with the force of his entire being and Jin nods with the corner of his mouth quirked.    “I'll admit, I was pretty surprised when I heard through the grapevine that you guys became friends. But I’m glad she has someone with her.”   “We’re not like that.”   Jin hums. “Doesn’t change the fact that she has someone to support her.”   There’s a pause. “Can I ask you something?”   It’s the reason Jungkook went out of his way to ask him to come outside. He’s curious and maybe it’s not his place to be, but he’s always felt more involved than he should be. Jungkook wants to understand, to clear his confusion, to hear the other side of the story.   “Depends on what it is.” Seokjin smiles.   “Why did you break up with Y/N?”   You had never really told him the reasoning, and he’ll admit it was bizarre when the two of you split. Jungkook always thought you were one of those irritating high-school sweetheart couples that would eventually get married and settle down with one another. The kind of couple that would get their love story posted in the newspaper after their seventy year anniversary.    A picture-perfect happily ever after.   Seokjin sighs, a cloud of condensation emitted through his parted lips. He leans against the brick wall and looks up at the night sky. “Sometimes...there doesn’t need to be a bad reason or a red flag or some kind of deal breaker.”   “Then why?”   Seokjin shrugs. “I always felt like Y/N loved me a lot more than I loved her. Always.”   “Sometimes, it felt like she put me on a pedestal. Other times, I think I made her feel inadequate. But she was always willing to give up everything for me.” Their eyes connect, Jin’s sheepish and soft. “And for me, I constantly felt like I had to play the part of a good boyfriend, rather than be one because it came naturally. It made me feel guilty. She didn’t do anything wrong. I think I just realized sooner that we weren’t the ones for each other.”   A disconnect. Jin liked you — he adored you — but you loved him wholeheartedly with your entire soul. Even now you still earnestly love Jin.   Jungkook isn’t sure what to do with the new information. But he suddenly feels bad for you. More than he ever has.

#bts fanfic #bts scenario #jungkook fanfic #jungkook fluff #jungkook scenario #bts fluff #bts fanfiction #jungkook reader insert #jungkook x reader #y'all this is a shorter chapter than usual #but last chapter was also a lot longer than usual #ANYWAYS I hope this gives you the answers you were looking for lol