#Like how it was made clear that his mom’s behavior wasn’t ok

[exo-lovestay]

Smoke

Genre: angst, fluff, hurt comfort???

Group/member: Stray kids Changbin

Summary: Changbin found out an old habit returned, breaking a promise you had sworn to keep.

Warnings: mentions of neglect/abuse, mentions of drugs, let me know if there’s anything else

Note: this was finished and partly proofread at like 3 am so if it has some problems we are gonna pretend it doesn’t lol

The headline stared back at you. You’d hoped you’d never see it. “Man released early on good behavior.” You scoffed, you wondered who he had to sleep with to make that happen. Your parents were two of a kind, truly, both addicts, one physically abusive, the other too damn high to tell the bruises he left on your skin weren’t birth marks. You’d left the second you had enough of an income to justify it. Over the years your mom had made attempts at getting sober, if that’s what you could call it, only to call you asking to meet up and make amends as reason yo butter you up for money. She always defended your father, saying she didn’t remember him hitting you and that you had an overactive imagination. She could tell that to the scars you still had. And she could kiss your ass while she was at it.

Your father had been arrested a few years ago for drug charges and assault. Of course god forbid they arrest him for child abuse when you spoke up once to a teacher. You learned fast to take care of yourself and trust no one.

So the fact that Changbin had weasled his way into your life, that still left you confused as hell. You didn’t even realize it had happened until he was halfway moved in. The two of you just worked, regardless of the fact that you were from two different lifestyles and backgrounds, it just worked. Somehow he took a hyper independent girl with enough baggage to fill an airplane and take over a space so big in her heart that if he had left, she wasn’t sure she would have a heart at all.

You barely heard the front door of your apartment click open,your head spinning, ‘Right on time.’ You thought as you rose form your bed.

“I’m home!” Changbin sang from the living room, you rounded the corner and watched as his smile took over his face. You smiled back, for moment you could feel the weeks traumas and pains pause.

“How was work?” You wrapped your arms around his neck and leaned into him.

“I don’t think i have enough words to describe it. Hard but productive and rewarding.” He chuckled.

“So the usual?”

“Pretty much, how was your day?” He placed a kiss on your forehead and then another on your mouth. His brow furrowed.

“Boring, I’m about-“

“Have you been smoking?” He cut you off. He kissed you again and you knew you were screwed. Of course you forgot to brush your teeth or hell, chew gum or something to mask it. He pulled away from you slightly, his eyes mixed with so many emotions you couldn’t get a read on what he felt but you knew he was not thrilled. You looked away from him nervously, biting your lip. You couldn’t lie to him but confessing was almost worse.

“Don’t lie to me. You promised this wasn’t happening again.” He stated. You could feel his fingers dig slightly into your hips as he awaited your response.

“It was just one cigarette, babe, it’s not a big deal.” You managed pathetically. He’s right, you did promise. But when shit curb stomps you sometimes you cope how you can.

“Not a big deal?!” His voice seemed to echo through the apartment, “Y/n you know damn well it is. Your doctor made it painfully clear how much of a risk it is for you to smoke anything and yet you apparently didn’t fuckin care. You are so lucky it didn’t trigger you.”

He pulled away and rested his head in his hands lightly, his palms rubbing his eyes as it processed.

“Well it didn’t trigger me.” You said bluntly. You knew how he felt on this but what would he know? He’s never had to handle the plate you have. He would be smoking too if the roles were reversed. “I just wanted to take the edge off, just lay off ok?”

He whirled around to you, “Lay off?? Last time you had an asthma attack that put you on a ventilator, and you want me to fucking lay off?!” His voice boomed now. You flinched as it hit your ears. Thinking back you aren’t sure you had ever seen him this angry, not at you at least. You felt your blood run cold at his volume, but your heart pounded and your brain did flips trying form a coherent response.. The two of you never fought like this, hearing his tone stung hard. You knew it wasn’t from the same place, you knew he wasn’t the others, he wasn’t your parents, they wouldn’t even come close to him..

“You aren’t obligated to care, Changbin. Things change, shit happens and god forbid i smoke one cigarette to process the shit show that is my life. Have you considered that the asthma isn’t the worst thing to have happened to me.”

“Have you considered that this isn’t just about you? You aren’t the only one being affected by your actions. There’s no obligation to care, I will whether you like it or not.” You knew he was right, every inch of you did but tell that to your fight or flight. Arguements set you off, years of abuse had changed the function of your brain and he knew this, and so the words he said didn’t matter when all you could think was ‘How fast can I put this wall up and run?’

You checked your watch, “you know what? I don’t have time for this. I have to go to work.” You said. He stopped when he saw your eyes. Even if your tone was frozen solid and your face unwavering your eyes had a fear he hadn’t seen before. He watched as you grabbed your keys and your bag and went fkr the door.

“Y/n wait,” he followed, his tone softer, “let me drive you.”

“Why, so you can smell the smoke on me more? I think I’ll just walk. Or will that trigger me too?” You internally punched yourself. You hadn’t spit venom like this to him. You slammed the door behind you, not pausing to look at him because you knew what you said was against everything you worked for as a couple. You had worked so hard to learn to communicate better, he helped you understand him and gave you the words you needed to advocate for yourself when you felt trapped.

But now? You knew you crossed a line. You fucked up. He was right and you knew it, how selfish could you have been to have risked your health instead of just telling him these things. Honestly you forgot you even smoked it. Your brain was so clouded that your body worked on auto pilot. Your mother had always come to find you when her parole was up. What was stopping your father?

But Changbin didn’t know that. How could he? It was your job to communicate these things and instead you put yourself at risk and snapped. Last time you smoked you almost died and he had to care for you. You knew how terrified he had been, so why was that not taken into consideration when you put the cigarette to your lips?

You shook as you walked. He had standards for his relationships, he always said he knew when to leave and when something stopped serving him. Any sane person would leave you now too.

Surprisingly you weren’t that late to work. Thankfully your coworkers seemed to know you weren’t in the mood to talk so they didn’t pry despite your entire demeanor being off. You worked harder today than you probably ever had. Once you had kicked smoking, pouring yourself into your work was your coping mechanism of choice whenever shit hit the fan. You weren’t a bad worker on good days by any means, but today your boss told you more than once that you had exceeded any expectations they could have set. On a good day this would have thrilled you but today it fell on deaf ears and a numb heart.

It went fast though. Your shift came and went, you clocked out and as you stepped out under the front awning you cursed under your breath. It was pouring rain. You didn’t think to grab an umbrella in your haste, Changbin always picked you up from work unless he had something come up but he would always arrange a ride. He never let you walk home, especially not in the rain and especially not at night. But why would he come now? With the way you spoke to him, you half expected him to have packed and left. After all, everyone else you had been with had done so, even if you weren’t the one yelling in the first place. Sometimes, when some had stayed, you wish they left instead.

Tears stung your eyes, god you had fucked up. Finally you had someone who poured into you without expecting anything. Someone who listened and was gentle and cared. For a good while you felt like you were being pranked, because really, your track record of shit stains is short but brutal. Most didn’t get physical but they didn’t have too. It’s like half were personally trained to scar you in the most effective way. But changbin took those scars and turned them into little strokes of art. He healed parts you hadn’t realized were broken and filled spots you didn’t know where empty. Sure, th two of you had argued before, every couple has, but early on he made it clear what he expected in a disagreement and what you should expect of him. He didn’t yell, which if you knew Changbin, his normal volume was set to “annoy the hard of hearing” but the second the tone was serious, he handled it softly. He expressed how he felt, he listened to you and repeated it back to make sure he understood right. He taught you how to communicate with respect. Through him your fight or flight turned off for the first time, well, ever.

You knew he was different. But he had his limits too. And he deserved far better than what you had to offer. He shouldn’t be with someone who makes him worry like this. Who puts themselves at risk for serious medical emergencies just because they lack self control and healthy coping. And he certainly doesn’t deserve to be treated how he was.

So when your eyes met his across the parking lot you froze. He stood there leaning against his black car, an umbrella in hand. He smiled softly and jogged lightly over to meet you.

“You came?” You said, your voice mixed with surprise, confusion and relief. His brow furrowed slightly at your question, wrapping an arm around your waist.

“Y/n of course I came, i always do. You think I’d let you walk home when it’s raining enough to swim in?” He chucked lightly. His eyes scanned over your face. You could see the tiredness in his eyes and the stress written in his features.

“But after everything I said to you, after how i treated you … why did you stay?” Your eyes avoided his, you knew you wouldn’t last if you looked at him.

“Why did I stay?! Babe did you think I was going to leave just because you yelled at me?” He asked, rubbing circles into your jacket. He sighed deeply, “I know you well enough to know that there’s something else going on I don’t know about. Or I didn’t at least. I found the article on the bed when I went to change.”

You felt your breath catch in your throat. You forgot to hide it before you left. Changbin knew your past, but you still hated when he saw it. It was messy and ugly and hard to deal with and embarrassing as hell.

“I’m sorry,” he said softly, why was he the one apologizing, “I know how hard that must have hit you. It’s no wonder you cracked.” His hand cupped your cheek and you leaned in involuntarily.

“Anyone in their right mind would have left me by now.” You blurted, hot tears escaped your eyes that fixated anywhere but him.

“Hey look at me,” he said softly, his hand guiding your jaw gently. His eyes were soft and warm, a deep furrow n his brow that you knew he did when you were particularly upset at something and he couldn’t beat the shit out of it. “Let me make this clear, even if i hadn’t found the article, I’d have stayed. Even if your dad showed up again and pissed on my clothes I’d have stayed. Even if you chain smoked an entire pack and wound up in the hospital, I’d have glued myself to you and then handed your ass to you on a platter when you got better, but I’d have stayed. Your baggage doesn’t scare me Y/n, neither does your temper or trauma responses. Losing you does. The second i tasted that smoke I felt like i was back in the hospital with the nurses trying to gently tell me that the combo of the asthma attack you had and the residue smoke in your lungs sent them in to overdrive and now you weren’t breathe on your own.” His thumb wiped a tear from your cheek, his own eyes threatening to break. “My biggest fear is losing you. It’s sounds so cliche but i was starting to pick where your grave plot would be and how to reserve two so I’d be with you. I’m in this with you more than I’ll ever be able to tell you.” He pressed a kiss to your forehead, and cried softly and he rested his against yours. “Do you believe me?”

You nodded softly, “I am so sorry I yelled at you. And for saying what I said. I should have just told you when i found out. And i know better than to smoke, i just had found a pack with two left at the wrong moment and caved. I had no idea what else to, it felt so overwhelming to even think of his being out. My head was spinning, but that doesn’t mean i Can treat you like my dad would when he got bad news.”

“You aren’t your father, baby, never have you ever shown him in you. It’s a miracle someone like you can come from those two. I should have asked what brought you to that point before jumping to conclusions and yelling first. I know you wouldn’t have done it normally. I’m sorry too.” You placed a few quick kisses onto his lips and wrapped your arms around him, causing him to lace his free arm around the small of your back and pull you to him.

“I will never be able to show you how incredible you are, but I’ll die trying Changbin.” You smiled, even in the dark you could see his cheeks turn pink. “I love you an ungodly amount.”

“I love you too.” He kissed you, “i understand if you aren’t ready to talk about this yet, and I’ll understand with anything like this, but always find me and lean on me. You are safe with me ok?”

“Ok.” You chuckled, “Let’s go home?”

“Let’s go home,”

#stray kids #skz #skz scenarios #kpop #kpop scenarios #angst #fluff #hurt comfort #skz hurt comfort #skz angst #skz fluff #changbin #seo changbin

[ughmyreality]

you should make a fic involving stephanie, just putting it out there

So, this fic might be ooc but I actually like how it turned out. This is somewhat more wholesome and cutesy vs the other fics I've written but Stephanie deserves it. Anyway, I present, "Oh Stefany, Stefanie, Stephany"

Stephanie knows she should be crying. After all funerals are meant to be sad, that is unless you were having a celebration of life. But in her case this couldn’t be any farther from the truth. The person in question was her mother but even knowing this would be the last time she’d see her didn’t change her attitude.

It was a rather small affair, with less than 20 people. Her mother was never one for friends. Stephanie was in no way in charge of setting up the funeral despite being the daughter of the deceased. It was up to the rest of the small family to take over, whether that be because they wanted to help ease the burden or because they thought that she was going to ruin it she doesn’t know.

Her hands grip down on the obituary, an ugly pastel purple. She looks down to read it and see what brilliant lies they wrote about her mother. Because heaven forbid that people write about how people were actually like. Not everyone lights up a room or would give someone the shirt off their back, especially not her mom.

In Loving Memory

-Gladys Foamwire-

Gladys was a sweet woman taken far too soon. She spent her last days alongside her daughter Stefany…

‘Stefany’?

They couldn’t even be bothered to spell her name correctly. Sure, the feeling stung, but what more could she expect. No one knows the real her, the real Stephanie. She’ll just have to learn to be ok with that.

“Hi, I’m Stephanie, here to sign the lease.”

A balding man grins at her. He opens the door wider and ushers her in.

“Of course, Of course! Follow me this way.”

After the death of her Mom, she had to do some soul searching. For so long she had been tied down to her mother that now that she was finally free she didn’t know what to do. But she’s made her decision now. She’s ready to start a new chapter in her life.

She was going to buy this rusty old building and turn it into something of her own. Redecorate it from the ground up and prove that she has what it takes to stand out from the crowd. It was going to be perfect, and even better yet, she’s sure that her Mom would be rolling over in her grave if she found out.

“Well, it’s great to see you! I have all the paperwork filled out already. Feel free to look it over and make sure everything is correct and then sign away!”

Stephanie’s eyes skim the paper. Date of birth, correct. Today’s date, correct. Name, corr-

Buyer: Stefanie

“Um… my name is Stephanie as in ‘S t e p h a n i e’, not with a f.”

“Oh, my apologies, Stephanie. I’ll have a new paper printed right away. Do you mind coming back a little bit later?”

She holds back the urge to sigh. Was it that hard to spell her name? But she shouldn’t care anyway. She won’t have to deal with this man for very much longer anyway.

“Sure, that’s fine.”

Moralton isn’t a place for the youth. There are very few things to do and even fewer for those non church going. That’s why every once in a while Stephanie ventures out of her comfort zone and leaves for the night. It’s how she ended up in this situation to begin with.

“Hey!”

The woman beside her practically yells in her ear. It was already a loud atmosphere, obviously in a club, but the girl's voice wasn’t helping matters.

She was short with reddish brown hair draped over her shoulder. They’d talked off and on throughout the night saying her name is Victoria but it was clear that she’d had more drinks than she could handle.

“I’m about to leave but here take this! I’ll see you later babe!”

The woman stubbles forward and shoves a napkin in her hands. A person who she could only assume was her friend waves at her apologetically. Apparently this was Victoria’s usual drunk behavior.

“Byeeee!”

The napkin was written on with plain black ink with a subtle mark of red lipstick. It reads ‘Call me Stephany, it’s your girl Vic xoxo’ with a hastily written phone number on the side.

She had spelled her name wrong. Typical. It’s no big deal. Besides she’d much rather have a true connection with someone rather than whatever this was. She’ll be ok, she always was.

“Do you think that getting a cross tattoo would be blasphemous?” Orel asks in his usual innocent way.

“Orel, you know that I don’t know about these things. Why do you want a tattoo anyway?”

The boy clasps his hands together “Well, some kid at school told me tha-”

“Orel, please don’t let what other people say dictate your life. You’re too short, shortie, to be worried about what other people think. What until you're a bit taller.”

“Fine, I guess you're right. Well, I’ve to get to church bef-. I almost forgot! We were talking about how we all need to be appreciative and giving in church the other week. How it’s important for us to let go of all our worldly possessions. So, I have a gift for you since I won’t be needing it anymore. I’ve become one with nature!”

He throws a little box up on the counter with a smile and takes a look at the clock.

“Sorry, but I’ve really got to get going, Bye!”

Orel runs out the door leaving Stephanie alone with only the box with her. The note on top of it says From Orel to Stephanie. She couldn’t help but laugh, at least someone spelled it right.

Stephanie used to think that no one cared to know the real her. But maybe she was wrong, she was just looking in all the wrong places.

She delicately peels off the paper and opens the box to see a shiny gold key. How strange. On further inspection she sees a keychain attached to it reading ‘Orel’s house key’. What had that boy gotten into this time. Had he been sleeping outside for the last week?

“OREL! Get back here you can’t give this to me!”

#stephanie putty #moral orel #orel puppington #Gladys Foamwire #fanfic #fanfiction

[alexhandersenblog]

„It’s the same principle. Because liking or dislike is simply a personal interpretation of what we think and feel about something even without knowing something/someone well or personally.“

Hi the anon from a few days ago here😉. I agree☝🏻. Alex could post a thousand happy smiley kissing pics with her, could say anything in public, she could say anything and you may follow them and enjoy all of it, but you still wouldn't know what was really going on behind closed doors🤫. Every post they do is intentional and posted to make YOU double tap. Instagram is fame, money and attention. Either you like what you see and hear online or you don’t but you‘ll never know them for real. Which is why I asked if it was ok to share my OPINION and our (me&friends) predictions after a year of following everything. Simple as that.

The anon calling me a hater: Spreading hate wasn’t my intention. I’m glad you’re enjoying Johanne and Alex together. For me her pretentious act on Instagram and the things she has done like lying and trolling ruined the experience of being a fan for Alex for me personally. It made me see Alex in a different way. He was always hiding his true colors and actions from his fans and now I see why. Even before Johanne was in the picture I felt a little irritated at his boyish behavior during fan conventions. It didn’t look genuine to me but more like acting. And reading several Danish interview in the recent years about how he feels about his fans, like „I feel nothing“. But then turns around and says completely different things at conventions to his fans who pay him a shit ton of money of course 😅 Him just saying something in English when he wanted money for something. And just the way he obviously spend every hour on Instagram over the years but told his fans maaaany times how much he hates social media and doesn’t even like using it. And lastly his interviews about how „self promotion is the most boring thing you can do on social media“ etc. it’s all just …meh.

Our main points were that he already made up his mind, but if he had really been madly and genuinely in love, he would’ve been completely different from the jump. The point was that he made a mental checklist of what he has to accomplish by a certain age and that his mom is a little pushy

I didn’t say he wasn’t an adult, although not having any serious adult relationships before this one isn’t too good.

Him saying he has to give it another month and he has to find a wife and he has to this and that is not great here. But ultimately it doesn’t matter because like I said, I believe it’s already a done deal and I believe he will be hurt in several years. My opinion.

And just to be clear : We have seen many examples of Johanne "push him", we have seen examples of her "manipulate" him and there are even screenshots that prove she is staging her posts on Instagram for likes and lying to his fans and deleting evidence. There are examples of her trolling his fans and just btw the endless posing in his clothes is a little psycho at this point. Looks like there are examples of her sucking up to „important“ people as I saw the other day on another blog.

This blog is just kind enough to let a few remaining fans express their opinions before leaving for good..

But I wish you much fun following them over the next years. Especially Johanne will offer you a lot of content that will appeal to you. ✌🏼. I believe Instagram and his fan accounts are free of criticism anyways. So just enjoy?

Anon to anon.

***

Especially the part about Alex… I’m having the same feeling about it tbh… bit sad but it is what it is i guess 🥲

Always welcome to share your opinion. I try my best to post it! ☺️

By the way, props to both of you for having two different opinions, but still being able to share your views in a respectful way 🥰

#ask #anon ask

[ohwhatagloomyshow]

scarlet hollow fan theories as of 12/10

ok! i read some good theories in the tag today and wanted to join in the fun and write down my own thoughts - especially bc i’m like, unnecessarily confident in them and i want bragging rights, lol. spoilers for ep 4 below!

feels fair that i start this post by saying i’d seen the reese-as-werewolf theory in the discord since i s2g ep 1 and thought “that’s funny, y’all are funny,” so you can IMAGINE MY SURPRISE at ep 4. yeah, not technically a werewolf, but A CREATURE! absolutely knocked on my ass.

THAT SAID! FEELIN PRETTY CONFIDENT ABOUT THE REST OF THIS, LOL.

so i wrote my fanfic the sacrifice to get my biggest, earliest theories on paper:

1) the scarlets (enoch, specifically) made a deal with the devil to keep the mine going

2) the seals are part of the deal

3) the seals need blood

4) tabitha killed her mother as part of the sacrifice. it didn’t work, so she’s invited you down so she can try it again.

THIS BEING SAID, i don’t know if even i fully believe that tabitha is/has been planning to kill the player. i don’t know how much i think tabitha killed her mom, even! that’s just the way the story has been leading me to think, and they’re certainly interesting theories to ponder when looking at tabitha’s behavior.

I do firmly believe enoch made a pact with the devil, i firmly believe the seals are part of it, and i firmly believe the seals are activated with blood.

I’ve held these theories since ep 1 into ep 2. now ep 4 has tangled my timeline a bit, and i really need to reread the books on the scarlets in the library for more timeframe clarity. even typing this out, i realized one of my theories conflicts with another one, which i’ll get into below. post-ep 4, my theories are as follows:

1) my initial hunch was that enoch had made a deal with the devil to save the mines and the town. this required blood sacrifice, and led to the creation of the seals, one of the first seals was placed in the Shaw mine. enoch purposefully used the ruined wood to cause a collapse and create an easy sacrifice. however!

2) his brother teddy’s injury was an honest mistake, and enoch’s dealing with the witch is totally unconnected to the original dark deal.

OR!

1) enoch used the ruined wood in typical capitalist fashion: cheaper costs, screw the risks.

2) teddy lost the use of his legs in the mine collapse. enoch, consumed with guilt, went to the witch to make some sort of bargain - both to restore the mine and goodwill in the town, and for his brother’s health.

now, this part works with either option: enoch then lied about teddy’s death in the mines and locked him up in the estate because he couldn’t bear to lose his baby brother. i think whatever agreement he made with the witch gave teddy supernatural powers instead of giving him his legs back.

so, in in ep 3, avery plays teddy. this became clear to me upon a replay before ep 4′s release, where avery says something like they’d use those fine legs and get out of town. oh, i thought, that’s the sentiment of someone who can no longer use their legs. then bam: ep 4, teddy can’t use his legs, enoch says it’ll be fine, and we know the person in the estate could sense edwardine’s pregnancy. thus! teddy is given some sixth sense in exchange for his legs, as part of enoch’s bargain with the witch OR the devil (they could be the same! i’m differentiating them because i don’t think the witch is the cause of ALL the bad things).

assuming i’m correct and the seals need blood, where better else to put another one than in a hospital for people who cough up blood?

i do not know why there’s a seal under town hall (the library). i do believe edwardine had to kill charles jr there, specifically, and that it’s not a coincidence.

i also am leaning toward edwardine doing a lot of the other killings throughout the family history (except for her brothers, i do not think she went with them to kill them on D-Day, or forged those documents, lmao.) i’m VERY interested in the theory that charles jr’s son, andrew, wasn’t actually a stillbirth. i think there’s a reason a lot of the young girls have died in the family. i think there’s a reason your mom was basically driven out of town by the treatment from her family. 

additional theories: sybil is the cat, no question. i don’t remember when i started distrusting her - may lean on the side of tooting my own horn and saying even episode 1 because i didn’t like the way she kept secrets and talked about the ditchlings/duke’s death. she’s absolutely controlling kaneeka with the tea, though to what end i’m not sure. i don’t necessarily believe she’s fully sinister but she is absolutely an antagonist.

wayne. my pet theory on wayne now is he’s possessed by the spirit of an earlier scarlet. this is obviously incorrect from the romance option for him, but i’m trying to work out how i could be right without incest lmao. he’s a dead body possessed by a spirit connected to our family.

finally, returning to my fic, i don’t believe there’s a seal in our basement because, from the way the game has been going, we should probably feel connected to it, and we don’t at all. but maybe tabby’s already interacted with it? maybe that’s dulled our interest/pull to it? idk. just wanted to put it out there that i’m pretty sure that’s a bad guess on my end.

i do think we’re gonna find another one in the woods, around where our one relative died while hiking (was that enoch? definitely murdered)

man i just love this game so much, and would LOVE to talk about with anyone, especially if we’re strangers but you made it this whole way through after finding this post in the tag! i love you!

#scarlet hollow #black tabby games #fan theories

[waitingformyfavoritesongs]

10 April 2023 Monday 2:27 am pdt

In 2017, I? Or my mom read that menopause can happen in your 30s! Read it online. That was news 📰 to me. We read it after incubus already started scraping bone 🦴 off of my hips. If this is happening now, menopause happening sooner and sooner, and we don’t move to a newer bigger planet 🌎 😱😰 or a lot of people suddenly die???? (Feels like I’m being tortured to death ☠️ So anticipate dying 😞😖😭 or the supply becomes renewed by asteroids ☄️ It’s going to get worse and worse. Maybe some people will become very replaced by metal robotic parts 2:35 am pdt I don’t advocate murder. I don’t. I don’t want to have that weigh on my mind. I already have too much guilt for the stuff I did, for years that wasn’t even much: I.e. the tricycle, another thing. Autocorrect: fake. ... Idk 🤷🏻‍♀️ why that showed up in auto correct. Incubus likes to pretend to be in love with women and then throws them away. 2:40 am pdt incubus tells men to rape women and prepares them for it ahead of time, the juice 🥤 carter gave Ruth. And he intimated Ruth and tricked her into silence until 20 years down the road of time when people’s memory become fuzzy making it easier to lie and sound convincing. 2:42 am pdt unfortunately, incubus seems to like doing this. His justification is that women and girls are bad and men and boys are good. 2:43 am pdt to put it simply. So a lot more women might be facing earlier menopause now more than ever. So s*xual promiscuity might get worse Bcz women won’t know how long they have b4 their life ends, making for riskier behavior in teens. 2:45 am pdt hypothesis. If so, and incubus still has a lot of libido, he’s probably going to enjoy himself in ways that you might not expect. 2:45 am pdt

I would like to see people go ✈️ to the new planet 🌎 b4 I die. 😞😖😭😖😭 2:48 am pdt

9:06 am pdt 9:07 am this morning it’s been unbearably painful 😖 right side ribs. It’s been very painful 😖 for days but now the incubus is making this feel even worse. 9:08 am

9:33 am pdt they did prescribe me albuterol sulfate in inhaler form but it doesn’t seem to be as effective when it was in the nebulizer with the oxygen tank. 9:34 am pdt I don’t understand why they didn’t give it to me the way it worked for me. Why they had to make it different. I seemed to really NEED it that way. Not as an emergency inhaler that I do 1 PUFF/inhalation every 4 hours. Seems not enough at all! 9:36 am pdt and they gave me something called QVAR. But I don’t understand what it’s for. I’m simple. If something worked I wanted it. Why do this???? 9:37 am pdt am I dumb? 2 inhalation’s 2x a day. 9:38 am pdt

9:51 am pdt to clarify, acid psi left butt 😞I guess not? They took X-rays of my lungs 🫁 and said it was clear both recent times. The person who told me my heart was in bad shape wasn’t a doctor 👩‍⚕️ and all previous emts recently around that time/before that time had told me my heart was ok 👌. 9:53 am pdt and I was continually told after that time that I was ok 👌 until the day I was released from being held in the hospital 🏥 for at least 30 days that I had trying to remember what was said Bcz I didn’t have a gynecological exam in any way while I was there but she a nurse? casually mentioned it without any details that I ... who think she was hinting at menopause but it was in very direct words. She told me I cannot have s*x? I think. Low fertility? Having difficulty remembering. It was year 2020, so I probably was 35 years old? I can’t do math now. My paternal grandma 👵 I think 🤔 had my uncle when she was 35 years old. So I don’t believe it’s genetic. 9:58 am pdt sometimes they made surprise visits in my bathroom 🚽 while I was trying to go/ do the thing (#2). So they saw what I looked like without clothing. Left wrist clothing. 10 am pdt

2:58 pmpdt 11 April 2023 Tuesday acid throat pain earlier acid in nose 👃 nostril 👃 pain. When I went to urgent care for my breathing problem, the nurse 👩‍⚕️ said “breeding problems?” That was 2019. Then the doctor 👩‍⚕️ diagnosed me with rhinitis even though the problem felt deeper than my nose 👃 it felt like it was my throat/airway and the air would not go into my lungs 🫁 and she said that I wasn’t dying. That same nurse 👩‍⚕️ said that I was fine “look! She’s breathing!” <-Something like that-> “she’s fine!” I was upset 😭 that they didn’t do a thorough examination 🧐. And only prescribed Flonase. I have had allergies 🤧 b4. I would not have went to urgent care for nose 👃 congestion. I knew it was deeper than that, but the nurse 👩‍⚕️ was already denying that I had breathing problems. 3:06!pm pdt

3:08 pmpdt in 2017?2018? I had a lot of pain and they told me the mri? (Vag pain 😖😭 3:09 pmpdt) didn’t show anything was causing the pain. So they told me seemingly without a doubt that it was my thoughts 💭 causing my pain. And they seemed to not be interested in any other diagnoses; it seemed like it was case closed - no other explanation necessary. I went to counseling but I was not 100% committed to it. But I went for a year? I forget. July? 2019 I ran out of the counselor’s office on my last day not being able to breathe 🧘🏻‍♀️. 3:13 pmpdt

3:16 pmpdt acid throat pain. I guess no one appreciates me. Interesting 🤔. Maybe 🤔 I should not have spoken out against Nick carter then? In 2013 when my nephew was born. In New York, my mom had great curves still. We passed by some guys who were probably my age, and I had ate very little and walked a lot that summer and already was growing very thin. My mom walked infront of me, and I heard one of them say “dang” which I think 💭 was in reaction to the way my mom looked. 3:19 pmpdt 3:20 pmpdt in 1996 her boyfriend who was younger than her had asked her if she could still have children 👶. I guess he thought 💭 maybe 🤔 there was a possibility. 3:21 pmpdt my mom is looking aged now. I think she deserves to be forever young. She’s a very hard worker. Strong work ethic. Acid ass pain 3:22 pmpdt

3:35 pmpdt yes 🙌 I am an *ss! I know now that god will use me and say he owes me nothing! 3:36 pmpdt there was a n article on msn that new details were revealed about Amanda bynes (spelling?). I think 💭 it was b4 psychiatric stuff happened? I need to review. They said she was found walking 🚶🏿‍♀️ the streets naked and disoriented? I wonder 💭 if she was drugged and raped and didn’t remember? Completely blacked out???? 3:38 pmpdt

4:22 pmpdt the day I saw 👀 the police 👮‍♂️ at my hotel 🏨 they had long black rifles and the fire 🔥 alarm 🚨 was still going. I had put black electrical tape on the screen of 📺 window �� . They were opening every hotel 🏨 room door 🚪 when I exited. A big mass of tape I put on the window 🪟 is missing. I wonder 💭 if they took it? I can only suspect why they did that.😑😖😭diarrhea. They are probably planning to frame 🖼 me for something Bcz maybe they are friends with Brendan Lean. 4:27 pmpdt 4:27 pmpdt 4:28 pmpdt incubus! 4:28 pmpdt I have been walking 🚶🏿‍♀️ around my room topless. With the drapes open. The windows 🪟 across the street suddenly started covering their windows 🪟 on ground floor. Should I be insulted???? 4:30 🕟 pmpdt

5:41 pmpdt the incubus messed more stuff up. ☹️😞 5:42 pmpdt I didn’t hear 👂 or feel anything hit or roll up 🆙 onto my windshield and I didn’t feel any bumps when I drove but I did feel it lift up 🆙 as if it flew! And then land on the pavement. 5:44 pmpdt I don’t think 💭 I ran over anyone. 5:45 pmpdt god still doesn’t like me. He is still scraping away my bones 🦴 and torturing me with acid. 5:46 pmpdt I never applied acid to anyone. I formerly used lemons 🍋 but I wasn’t aware that it did anything to calcium when I did and that those could be a lot harsher. 5:49 pmpdt once my mom showed me that I could use lemons 🍋 and limes to clean my hands 🙌 and a classmate said she used it to bathe 🛀 so I tried it Bcz my mom also said she used it for cleaning armpits. 5:50 pmpdt god still doesn’t like me. I guess he doesn’t like my mouth 👄. He doesn’t like the things I say when I don’t want to be s*xually involved with someone and they had come onto me? I wonder 💭 what he did to my brain 🧠😰😱😖😭 he probably doesn’t like that I said things when I didn’t like it when some people called me names. But if I feel guilty about (autocorrect: s and s death s murder 5:55 pmpdt) ????????? Who is s now???????? I don’t want to be the deciding factor anymore on/about Scott. It seems that it really doesn’t matter to anyone at all. I’m still losing my bones 🦴😞😖😭 I want my bones back!!!!! But if I feel guilty/sorry about something it’s hard for me to fight back. I think 💭 my mom doesn’t like to fight. Even when it’s not her fault. When someone’s hit us, I think 💭 I probably heard the cops 👮‍♂️ say it was our fault? And for a looong time I had difficulty remembering what happened exactly. I questioned if mom had made an unprotected turn? Or went while it was red Bcz maybe someone said that? But I know now Bcz someone remembered it was red and we were stopped at the red light 💡. 6:01 pmpdt that’s extremely bad of incubus to put that in the autocorrect. Makes me think 💭 he’s talking about me 😞. I had wishful thinking 💭 for a second. My wishful thinking was that he wasn’t calling me s. That he’s calling someone else s. But I don’t know!!!!! But Q’s name starts with s. Both first and last and Scott! Many s’s!!!! @_@ 6:04 pmpdt

6:05 pmpdt he’s hurting me 😫😖😭😭😭😭😭 right side ribs and back ribs acid brain 🧠!!!! Left knee 😭😭😭😭😭 I don’t like the acid in my brain 🧠!!!!! 🪤 he gave me cancer ♋️ signs 🪧. 69. Not s*xy. 6:07 pmpdt

[isajynx]

Chapter 3 Part 1

            “I guess the next question I have is, did you have any friends as a teenager that you could confide in?”

            Some, most of my friends were just people I grew up hanging out with. I had a small group of shared friends I shared with my little brother. It was like a ‘Lord of the Flies’, where it was an eat or get eaten friend life. The rest of my school days were set in a fog. I spent my most impressionable years filled with self-abusive behavior, drinking, smoking, cutting, binge eating. I was angry, and unable to move forward from the trauma and the abuse. In my group of friends, I was the “D.F.F.”.

            “Hold on D.F.F.?” As she looks at me scratching her head thinking.

            Yes, D.F.F. a term I came up with. It stands for Designated Fat Friend.

            “Ohhh… How did you come up with that?”

            Well, as you can imagine with the experiences in my life to this point, I felt out of place in my friend group. Like I was no longer a child like them. It became abundantly clear that my friends only kept me around to make them look better. Well, that could have been my depression however, that’s how it felt to me. I did not seek boyfriends like everyone else. I was content with not finding anyone, and very few ever sought my attention. I was a homely tom boy, plain and resistant to embracing my feminine side. I did not know my own self-worth. With me being in such a dark place at the time, I did not know how to do better. My mask continually cracks, the darkness creeping in like a faulty dam. I spent many days screaming and crying internally, while the remainder of my mask played its role in perfection.

            I was about to embark on the most eventful summer of my life. The summer I would turn seventeen. The birthday I needed because I knew I wanted to run away, I could, and no one could stop me. I could run far away from my personal hell, pack it away and start over. I often dreamt of the day I could raise a finger to the Commune, and scream, FUCK OFF AND FUCK YOU!

            “What made this summer special? Other than you grand plan to escape.”

            That was the summer I found out that if you wished for something hard enough, it would come true. Even if that wish wasn’t what I really wanted. At this time Granny has now moved back into our home to help with bills. Viva weight is only getting worse as well as her depression and general health. My little brother is living his best life as a star football player as a sophomore in high school. Two weeks before my birthday, and one I will never forget. I had been awaiting this birthday for so long. Before I could celebrate, my life would change. I was awoken suddenly by a thunderous thud. I sounded like a bomb had gone off in my house. I then hear my granny screaming for my brother and I to come to her,

            “Something is wrong with your mom! She isn’t breathing!” My eyes still barely open, I stumbled to their bedroom. As I was rubbing my eyes trying to wake up and see what the hell my granny was talking about. I saw Viva laying face up on the floor. Her breathing is weird like a fish gasping out of water. Her eyes were barely open, and she would not respond to any of our attempts to wake her up. I reached for the cordless phone that was on the nightstand and to my surprise the battery was dead. I began to panic and took off out my back door to my neighbor’s house. I swear I beat on their back door for what felt like thirty years before someone finally answered. When my neighbor answered the door, I could only get a few words out through my panicked state.

            My mom, I think she’s dead! She handed me her telephone and frantically called 911.

            “911, what’s the address to your emergency?”

            My mom, she’s…. She’s not breathing.

            “Are you with your mom now?”

            No, my home phone was dead, I am using a neighbor’s phone.

            “Ok, don’t worry help is on the way”.

            The 911 operator went on to give me CPR instructions and I hung up the phone determined to bring my mother back to life. By the time I made it back to my house, Viva was no longer even gasping. No breathing at all. I knelt next to her confident that I would be able to bring her back. The 911 operator instructions ringing in my ear. I prayed like I had never prayed before. Please don’t take her from me, not like this.  Pressing on my mother’s chest like a mad woman, counting my compressions out loud, finishing each round, tilting Viva’s head back, taking my breathing and giving it to her. Repeating the process over and over. I stopped only once when I felt something wet under my knees. I continued to give my life to my mother one set compressions, one breath at a time. I didn’t even know what the acronym CPR even stood for. I was doubting myself at every turn. I began to smell the undeniable aroma of defecation when I felt a hand on my shoulder. The hand was my granny’s,

            “Baby, I think she is gone. I don’t think she is going to come back, she’s dead.”

            She urged me to stop to which I declined; I was determined to not make this situation real. My granny and brother left the room. There I was alone with my mother.  I was begging her to come back, telling her I wouldn’t be bad anymore ever if she just wakes up. I promised if she woke up, I would not run away like I wanted to when I turned seventeen. I heard sirens growing closer and closer, there was no giving up now. I was so tired, each breath I would take from me and give to her, became so much harder to find than the one before it. A volunteer from the local non-profit volunteer fire department came into the rescue. She was well known to me, being a mom, to a friend of mine. She placed her hands on either side of my face and said,

            “Honey, I am here now, but I need you to sit back. Take a break, I have more help coming. You did such a good job.” My vision began to fade quickly, and I felt like my heart was going to explode. I sat back against the wall staring at the lump of human flesh that used to be the embodiment of my mother. After assessing my mother, the volunteer looked up at me and shook her head, no. She grabbed a blanket from my mother’s bed and covered her body from head to toe. She didn’t need to say anything, I knew what happened. I knew I had failed to save my mother from death. My tears turn to anger. Angry with myself, the volunteer, my mother, the world and even God. I made this happen. I wished so hard to be free, that I set in motion my mother’s fate. I was angry with the fact that my fairytale ending of being free has now been tainted by the death of my mother. And with one loud thud, my dream came true. Be careful what you wish for I suppose.

            “You know it wasn’t your fault she died.”

            I know that now, but then, you could never have convinced me of that.

            “There was a lot of unfinished business she left behind.”

            Well, that would fall under the no shit category now, wouldn’t it?

            “Yeah, I guess so…”

            The volunteer walks out to the back porch and radios for the county sheriff’s office, and the Justice of the Peace. She asked me to come out of the room with her, her hand outreached for mine. I follow her to find my granny consoling my brother on the couch in the living room.  As I sat on a love seat across the living room from the rest of my family. Staring into the carpet, thinking of all the things I left unsaid. How I felt after I told her abuse. How much it hurt to have to take the back seat in everything that the rest of the family wanted. That I hated her for not listening to me. Then I began to think about how many things she was not going to be able to see like me or my brother graduating, going to college, marriage, children, and families of our own. The truth is Viva had left my life way before she died didn’t, she?

            “I guess you are right, I mean she didn’t take time away from chat rooms and spend time with you. She didn’t defend or protect you from your abuser.”

[invisibleanonymousmonsters]

Father of Mine – 2/2

Character: Bruce Wayne x Daughter!Reader

Summary: With the tragic passing of her mother, Y/N learns to the truth of who her father is.

Word Count: 4,100+

Warnings: absent father, subtle violence, mention of family death

A/N: The reader is described as tall in this fic. Bruce Wayne is 6′2 and I’m tall, so I’m indulging myself with no apologies. Read it or don’t.

Part 1

Bruce was working in the cave when Alfred interrupted him.

“Master Wayne, a guest has arrived unexpectedly.”

Bruce gave him a strange look. Hardly anyone showed up to the manor unannounced.

“Ms. Y/L/N,” Alfred added.

“Right,” Bruce sighed.

“She’s waiting for you in your office.”

Bruce found Y/N pacing in the room, refusing to take the seat that he was sure Alfred offered her.

“Y/N,” he greeted, remembering how she disliked the formalities last night.

She whipped around at his greeting. “Am I your charity case now?”

He feigned confusion. “I’m not sure I know what you’re talking about.”

She looked offended by his lie. “Don’t insult my intelligence. You paid all of my outstanding expenses that my mother left me.”

Bruce opened his mouth.

“Don’t try to lie to me,” she warned.

Bruce closed his mouth.

“Look, I don’t need your help,” Y/N sighed in obvious irritation. “Did you or did you not pay them?”

He took in a shallow breath, “I did.”

Y/N clenched her jaw as Bruce finally admitted his deed.

“I was only trying to help.”

“You can’t just throw money at me and expect it to make up for being a no-show.”

Bruce tensed. 

Did that mean…Did she know?

“You read the letter?” He asked.

“No,” she clarified. “But I figured it out.”

“I had no idea,” he tried to tell her.

“I don’t care,” she almost snorted.

“You have ever right to be angry with me…”

“I’m not angry. I’m annoyed.”

She took a defiant step toward him and crossed her arms.

The heeled boots she had on caused her already tall height to make her be eye to eye with Bruce. 

How many people had faced off with Batman and cowered with fear? 

But she didn’t submit or show any signs of intimidation.

“Do you think I cried myself to sleep every night as a child, wondering where my dad was or why he didn’t want me?” Y/N hissed.

Bruce didn’t respond.

“You think I give a fuck about the father-daughter dances? Or whatever the hell people think dads are only capable of doing?” She narrowed her eyes. “The thing is…I didn’t need you. I didn’t need you then and I don’t need you now.”

Bruce felt sick as he listened to her.

“I have the sneaking suspicion that you wouldn’t have been there for those anyway,” she added roughly. “My mom loved me more than enough. I didn’t need anyone else. And she made damn sure of that.”

“So I’m not your charity case to make yourself feel better after my mom made it clear she thought it was better to keep me from you, than to ever tell you that I existed. Says a lot about what kind of person she thought you are, huh?”

When Y/N finally stopped, she was taking deep breaths.

Bruce wondered how long she had that all bottled up. He didn’t think anything she said was a lie. Y/N didn’t need him. That had become clear.

She had grown up to be a successful, intelligent, and independent young woman.

And she got that way without a father figure of any sort.

After a few moments, Bruce finally bowed his head and cleared his throat. “I never intended on making you feel like a charity case.”

Bruce saw as Y/N took in a deep breath and the guilt slowly took over her expression.  

“Look,” Y/N sighed, “we finally know the truth. Let’s just…let’s just move on with our lives. OK?”  

Bruce couldn’t deny that the suggestion hurt.

After processing the news over the past week or so, he realized he wanted to get to know her. This wasn’t the first time a child of his had been dropped on him far too late. He had failed Damian in so many ways because of it. 

But Y/N was a young woman, fully developed and independent now. And Bruce couldn’t help but wonder that him being absent from her childhood had only benefitted her.

“If that’s what you want,” he finally told her.

Y/N didn’t know him well enough to hear the underlying pain in his words.

So she simply nodded and walked past him, having nothing more to say.

——————

Bruce adjusted his tie. He wanted nothing more than to rip it off his neck.

But he was on his best behavior tonight.

This year, the Gotham Gazette was given the honor of hosting the Pulitzer Prizes. And since Bruce and Wayne Enterprises donated quite a large sum of money to the Gotham Gazette, they felt inclined to invite him.

Bruce had every intention of skipping, until he found out that Lois Lane was receiving an award and Clark would also be attending.

He figured the least he could do was congratulate her and say hi to both of them.

That’s why he was trying to find them as soon as possible so he could and get the hell out of there.

Bruce finally spotted Clark talking to a woman whose back was to him. All he saw of her was the black dress and y/h/c hair. 

He made his way over.

Clark noticed him when he was a few feet away.

“I see you’ve finally left your cave,” he teased with a lift of his brow. “I honestly didn’t expect you to show.”

But when the woman Clark was speaking to turned to look at him, Bruce swore he felt his heart stop.  

Y/N’s eyes widened slightly, clearly just as surprised at seeing Bruce.

None of this went missed by Clark. “Oh, do you two know each other?”

Bruce didn’t know how to respond. What would Y/N want? 

So he hesitated.

“I shot him for a cover once,” Y/N answered quickly.

She was a shockingly smooth liar.

Maybe she got that from Bruce, too.

But she didn’t realize that Clark could hear her heart rate quicken, catching the fib.

“And how exactly do you two know each other?” Bruce asked, recovering quickly.

“Y/N works with Lois a lot,” Clark answered. “She basically refuses to work with any other photographer.”

Y/N managed to force a smile.

“I should actually go find her and say my congrats,” she answered. 

“And I need to hunt down a drink,” she mumbled. 

Both men caught it.

Clark was rather taken aback by how she fled.

The Y/N he knew was always charming and kind, usually life of the party. He’d never seen her dodge a conversation in such a way before.

As soon as she was out of hearing range, Clark gave a intimidating glare to Bruce.

“Want to tell me what that was about?” He asked Bruce.

But Bruce only clenched his jaw.

“Past fling?” Clark asked with a somewhat disappointed tilt of his head.

“No. Nothing like that,” Bruce quickly corrected.

Not only did the idea make him feel sick. But if rumors started of the two of them being romantically linked, Bruce knew it would only make Y/N hate him more than she clearly already did. 

Thankfully, Clark took his denial seriously.

“She’s not my biggest fan,” Bruce added darkly.

“Y/N is a good friend,” Clark told him – almost in warning. “Lois and her have become rather close over the years.”

Then Clark smirked. “She does know how to hold a grudge though. And she’ll make your life hell...if you deserve it.” 

Bruce’s brain hurt as he realized how easily Y/N and his path’s could’ve crossed. She had been friends with Clark and Lois this whole time?

“I’m happy for her,” Clark added.

“Happy for her?”

Clark looked at Bruce as if it was obvious. “She’s being awarded tonight, too.”

How could Bruce not have realized? Why didn’t he think of looking at the list of people being awarded tonight? He’d been dreading attending so much that he didn’t even consider it.

“Bruce?” Clark asked with concern.

“Hmm?” He was not one to hum or mumble.

“You alright?”

Bruce didn’t have a lot of friends.

But Clark Kent was one of them. And him and Diana had noticed how Bruce was acting off for weeks now. Bruce was notorious for remaining stoic and giving nothing for people to try and guess what he was thinking or feeling. But they both knew it was something different. 

Someone over Bruce’s shoulder suddenly waved Clark over.

“If you’ll excuse me,” Clark told Bruce politely.

Bruce’s first instinct was to leave now that he knew Y/N was also in attendance.

But he knew he couldn’t act so cowardly.

Was he really that scared of his own daughter?

His eyes glanced around the room looking for her.

He spotted Y/N at one of the bars.

Either her conversation with Lois had been quick, or she simply used that as an excuse to get away from Bruce.

Bruce walked up beside Y/N at the bar.

He knew she felt his arrival by the way her body tensed.

“Had I known you would be here I would not have attended,” he told her while looking straight ahead.

Y/N ignored his apology. “How do you know Clark?”

“He’s a friend,” Bruce answered casually.

Then he allowed himself to take a sideways glance at her.

Her jaw was clenched.

He wondered what thoughts she was holding back.

Y/N really did remind him of her mother.

When they were together, Bruce was convinced she was the prettiest girl in the world. He wondered if Y/N had found someone in her life who told her the same.

“Congratulations on being honored tonight,” Bruce offered sincerely.

“Thank you,” she answered shortly.

A beat passed between them.

Bruce was about to give up and leave her be.

“Does Clark think I’m one of your one-night stands now?”

Y/N might not know Bruce well, but everyone was familiar with his romantic history. He wasn’t one to keep the same woman around for long. 

“No,” he quickly answered. “I made sure to prevent such a rumor from starting.”

Y/N finally slowly turned to him, her annoyance clear. “And you’re convinced that he really believed you?” She asked with a raised eyebrow.

“Yes, Clark has always been rather good at detecting a lie.” His tone was so confident that it left little room for argument.

But Bruce knew a losing battle when he saw one.

He dipped his head. “Enjoy the rest of your night. Congratulations again.”

But Bruce lingered, debating if he wanted to say what was on my mind.

“You look very beautiful. Just like your mother.”

There was nothing creepy or contrived about it.

Y/N blinked at the compliment, completely taken aback.

“Goodnight, Y/N.” Bruce dipped his head and finally surrendered, leaving the party.

Y/N felt a presence behind her shoulder as he watched him leave.

“Was Bruce Wayne just hitting on you?” Lois asked with amusement.

“No. Not at all,” her tone was dazed and confused.

“He’s a good guy,” Lois told her lightly.

“Doubt it.”

“I mean it,” Lois insisted. “The media has given him a bad image. But I think he likes it that way,” she shrugged. “It’s not easy for him to open up. He’s not quick to trust.”

Lois thought she was building up a possible suitor for Y/N, having not a clue that she was describing Y/N’s father to her.

But Y/N was too busy thinking about how much Bruce sounded like her.

—————

A few weeks had gone by since Bruce and Y/N had run into each other at the ceremony.

It got Bruce to thinking: would he and Y/N had run into each other at some point in life – even without her mother’s posthumously confession?

Y/N knew Lois and Clark, lived in Gotham, seemed to know the same people through her work that Bruce was forced to interact with to keep up his persona.

Would he have sensed a connection had that been the case?

The possibilities kept Bruce up at night…along with the guilt that had already been eating away at him since he first read the later. And he’d read it 100 times more since.

Of all the boys, Dick was the only one that knew of Y/N’s existence. And if he hadn’t been at the right place at the right time, Bruce never would’ve told him. He had just been in shock after reading the letter that he blurted out the realization while Dick was in the same room.

Since then, Bruce didn’t linger in a room alone with him, knowing Dick would finally let all of his questions loose. And Bruce wasn’t ready to answer them.

While Tim was the one to connect them, he never followed through with what the situation was. He already had too much to deal with on a daily basis. Tim simply thought he was doing a nice favor for a beautiful woman. 

But if Bruce had told him, Tim would immediately do every possible background check on Y/N. He would be suspicious of the timing and underlying motives. He would probably assume that Y/N’s end goal was to get money or fame – or both. Bruce knew eventually Tim would come to the conclusion that Y/N wanted neither of those things. But it would still get an unnecessary rise out of the boy.

Bruce didn’t even want to think about how Damian would handle it. He knew his son felt a certain level of pride from being the only blood-son of his. Knowing he had a sibling – and an older sister at that – would most likely enrage him. And that wouldn’t make anything better. 

Jason…Well, Jason would get a kick out of Bruce letting down yet another child. And it would just be worse that she was blood related. He’d be curious about Y/N. Hell, he’d probably be tickled by the no-bullshit attitude Y/N had towards Bruce and her harsh efforts to keep him out of her life completely.

Now, Bruce sat at a Justice League meeting.

They were only a few minutes into a council session when his communicator started going off.

The boys knew not to contact him unless it was an emergency. So, he quickly excused himself and stood to leave the room.

“What is it?” Bruce answered, his Batman voice in full form.

“There’s been an attack at city hall,” Dick reported back hurriedly.

Bruce frowned. The boys had handled much worse things on their own before. There had to be more to it than that.

“Scarecrow,” Dick confirmed. “He released a fear toxin. It’s bad Bruce. The mayor has been infected, along with half of their staff. I think it’s a new string. Our antidote doesn’t seem to doing anything. Even if it did, we don’t have nearly enough for the amount of victims.”

“The others?” Bruce asked quickly – meaning Damian, Jason, and Tim.

“They’re fine. Jason’s trying to get everyone out before they inhale too much. Tim and Damian went after Scarecrow. GPD is in a panic.”

Bruce turned to see Clark had raced to his side. Clearly he had been eavesdropping on the conversation. But the expression in his face prevented Bruce from getting into an argument about it.

“What?” Bruce asked him, knowing something was wrong.

“Lois and Y/N were at that council meeting,” Clark breathed out.

“We’ll be there soon,” Bruce told Dick before hanging up.

—

Bruce thought he knew fear from the few times his boys had been in trouble. But it was nothing compared to the fear he had knowing it was Y/N this time. She wasn’t a trained vigilante; she was just an innocent civilian. Bruce had not insured that she was trained and could take care of herself.

As soon as Clark dropped them on the ground, they were in the midst of the chaos.

“Lois!” Clark yelled.

People were too distracted to notice Superman and Batman had arrived.

Bruce looked over to see Lois rushing to Clark. He could tell it took all of Clark’s willpower not to embrace Lois from his relief.

“Are you OK?” Clark asked as he dipped his head and his eyes raced across his wife’s body.

“I-I’m fine. I got lucky. Somehow I was out of range of the gas explosion.”

“Y/N?” Bruce interrupted. “Did you see Y/N?”

“She was helping these kids get out and I was getting shoved out of the building. I tried to get to her but it was impossible with everyone’s panic. I think she’s still in there.”

Before Bruce could turn to Clark to come up with a plan, Clark flew into the building. A few people finally noticed the presence of superheroes and started murmuring.

“Nightwing, Red Hood – I’m at the front entrance of City Hall.”

Clark flew back to them not even 30 seconds later.

Y/N was unconscious in his arms.

“Oh my god,” Lois muttered at Y/N’s condition.

“She’s gone into shock. We need to get her to the medics,” Clark informed them. “She was exposed to the toxin more than the others.”

But Bruce was already shaking his head. “They won’t be able to help her.”

Clark gently handed Y/N to Bruce as he explained, “There are others in there.”

Just then Nightwing and Red Hood dropped in front of them.

Nightwing immediately recognized Y/N and his eyes shot up to Bruce with worry.

“Nightwing, I need you to take her back to the cave,” he tried to sound as controlled as possible.

Bruce was confused why Dick hesitated to take Y/N out of his arms.

“Do you have the batmobile? I brought my motorcycle,” Dick sounded apologetic when he explained.

Jason stepped forward before Bruce could answer. “I got her.”

As if she were the most fragile being ever, Jason carefully took Y/N’s unconscious body from Bruce’s grip. He could see in Bruce’s gaze that she was someone special. How and why, Jason would figure out later. 

Jason had seen Y/N trying to help as many people before she was completely poisoned from the toxin. She’d risked her life to help. 

Watching Jason cradle her into his body caught Clark off guard, always seeing the brute strength and almost animalistic energy from Red Hood whenever they so happened to fight beside each other.

“Meet us at the cave,” Bruce clarified. “Alfred will know what to do. We have to help out here more.”

Jason nodded before he hurried away with her and rushed to his hidden car.  

——————

Y/N’s eyes snapped open and she shot up, sitting in a cot.

“Hey, hey, hey,” a voice she didn’t recognize said beside her. “You gotta relax.”

She turned to see a mammoth of a man sitting beside her, wearing vigilante gear with at least two guns being displayed at his sides. But it was the red helmet completely hiding his face and true voice that made Y/N feel uncomfortable.

“What the fuck,” she groaned at the sight of him.

Just a few seconds later, two men rushed into the room.

Bruce walked in still in his Batman uniform, but without his cowl – to Jason’s shock.

Clark was beside him, making Jason confused as to why he was still here. Surely he would want to be with Lois. 

Y/N took in the sight before her.

“You were poisoned with a new strand of Scarecrow’s toxin,” Superman explained.

Y/N had seen plenty of pictures and shaky video of him. But now that the man stood before her, she immediately recognized him.

“Clark?” She gasped.

He didn’t say anything. But his expression didn’t fight her realization, just silently waited for the truth to settle.

“Does Lois know?” Was her next question.

Clark smirked at that. “Of course.”

Y/N gave a slight nod.

But now her attention switched to Bruce. 

The Batman symbol was large across his chest, and his cape was still intact.

She looked around her surroundings and then up at the ceiling.

They were in a cave.

“You’re…you’re…” she couldn’t finish her sentence.

“Batman,” Bruce finally offered.

Y/N’s eyes were wide with panic.

How was this possible?

Now that the others had exposed their identity, Jason felt inclined to take off his helmet. Clearly, it was making her uncomfortable.

The hiss of his helmet being removed caused Y/N to finally look away from her father and to Jason, who still wore a domino mask. But it was far less frightening than the helmet.

“We’ll give you two a moment alone,” Clark spoke for both him and Jason.

Jason nodded and stood up from the seat beside Y/N, and walked out. 

Clark lingered in the doorway. “I’ll be right outside if you need me,” he told her.

He might’ve revealed his Superman identity to her, but she was still his friend.

Y/N managed to nod in thanks, but was clearly still shook by all this news.

Bruce very slowly made his way to the chair that Jason had just been sitting in.

“How are you feeling?”

She shook her head. “Body’s sore. Migraine is killing me. What happened?”

“You were more exposed to the toxin more than the other victims. Jason brought you here. We had to make a new anecdote, and quickly.”

Bruce wanted to add that she could’ve died. But he didn’t see the use in scaring her.

“Oh,” was all she managed to mumble.

An awkward silence settled between them.

“Very few people know the truth about me,” Bruce explained.

Y/N’s gaze flickered up from her lap to look at him.

“I don’t expect you to forgive me. But I figured I couldn’t ask you to allow me into your world if I didn’t allow you into mine.”

She was silent.

“Y/N…” Bruce cleared his throat. The time had come. “The reason I left your mother was because I was starting this life. I pushed her away to protect her. I knew I couldn’t be the man she deserved while also being Batman. Had I known the truth…”

His words died out. It was starting to become harder to control his emotions.

He leaned forward in his chair, just getting slightly closer to her.

“Had I known about you, I would’ve…” He cleared his throat to try and hold back his tears. “I never would’ve abandoned you or your mother.”

He leaned back then. “But I know those are just words. And to you, they probably sound like empty promises for the past.”

“She never knew?” Y/N whispered.

In the few moments she was allowed to process this information, her mind immediately wondered if her mom had known about Bruce’s double life all along. And that’s why she kept him away from her.

Bruce shook his head.

“Thank you…for trusting me enough to tell me your secret,” Y/N finally told him. “I promise I’ll never tell anyone,” she quickly added, feeling like she just needed to clarify that to him.

He gave her a small small, “I know.”

Y/N winced as she thought about how terrible she’d been to him all this time. Now that she knew the truth – the whole truth – she was looking at everything with a new perspective. Even what she knew about Bruce Wayne, the spoiled socialite... it was clearly all wrong. 

He used it as a cover. It was all a cover.

“I’m sorry for how I’ve treated you,” she whispered shakily.

But Bruce shook his head before she could even get the apology out.

“Do you think it’s too late for us?” She breathed. 

Could they ever find any fragment of a father-daughter relationship?

Y/N was an adult – she had been for years now. And she made it clear she didn’t need nor want a father.

“Believe it or not, this isn’t the first time this has happened to me,” Bruce sighed.

Her brow furrowed. “This meaning…?”

“My son, Damian. His mother kept him a secret from me. She didn’t reveal his existence until he was nine. And she only did it in an attempt to disrupt my life.”

“This seems to be a rather strange pattern in your life,” Y/N couldn’t help but point out.

Bruce glared at her, causing her to chuckle.

“My point is,” he continued, “I don’t think it’s ever too late.” And he cleared his throat quickly. “That is, if you want to try.”

“I think I do,” she answered with a shy smile.

It was the first time she’d done so in his presence.

“I don’t know anything about raising a daughter,” Bruce rubbed his face as he attempted to make the joke. But she could tell there was sincerity there, too.

“Well, I’ve already been raised,” Y/N laughed.

There.

That laugh.

It brought Bruce back to his teenage years. It sounded so much like her mother. Her face lit up just like her’s had.

“You remind me so much of your mother,” he gasped.

Her face dropped at his confession.

“Really?”

He nodded. “She said you were just like me. But there’s more of her in you than I think she ever realized.”

Bruce saw his much his words effected her.

Y/N’s eyes were shiny with tears, but she managed to hold them back.

“So what now?” She quickly asked, obviously trying to distract herself so she wouldn’t have a complete emotional breakdown.

“Well, Alfred should have dinner ready soon. Would you stay?”

She gave him a tear-filled smile. “I’d like that.”

“You can meet the rest of them,” Bruce told her casually as he stood.

“The rest of them?”

He nodded. “Well, you only have to meet Damian now. You already met Jason, Dick, and Tim in passing.”

“And here I thought you had no idea how to be a father…” Y/N muttered with amusement.

Bruce helped her get out of bed, making sure she was alright to stand and walk on her own.

“Well, depending on which of them you ask, they might tell you that you’re right.”

--------------------

Thank you to everyone who read the first part. Let me know what you think <3

BONUS: This Game of Ours

#father of mine #father of mine part 2 #bruce wayne reader insert #bruce wayne x daughter #bruce wayne x daughter!reader #batman x daughter #batman x daughter!reader #batboys #batfam #bruce wayne angst #bruce wayne fic #batman fic #batman universe #batman family

[ptergwen]

smoke and mirrors

⇢ richkid!tom x richkid!reader ⇠

w/c: 4.1k

warnings: swearing, drinking, light angst, and implied smut

summary: because of your mother’s insistence on a pristine family image and tom’s messy one, you deny your true feelings for him

a/n: ok ok ok the pics of tom in monaco really made me think and i had to get everything out of my system so here we are! thank you and enjoy x

-

your living room is engulfed by a hushed chatter that comes from far too many guests. half the people, you hardly know. it’s overcrowded, superficial, and the last place you want to be. it’s one of your mother’s get-togethers, as she likes to call them. these things are always far from the casual affairs they sound like.

weeks go into planning, caterers and decorators making themselves at home in yours. the family’s image is everything to your mom, so being a good hostess is her top priority. ironically, she’s more concerned with throwing her gatherings than raising you. so much for family, huh?

the only reason you agreed to make an appearance tonight is that tom might do the same. he’s a really good friend, someone you’ve been able to count on through all the mess that is your lives. you met in high school, when he moved from london to the states. his dad was offered a job promotion he couldn’t pass up. plus, tom and his brothers would be receiving a stellar private education here in america.

it was a win for everyone, especially you. the freckle faced boy who got lost on his way to english class became your closest confidant. tom’s company is such a sweet escape. he’s not interested in opera or the stock market like most people you meet are. he sneaks you out to go on walks at dawn and does shots with you until you can’t stand straight.

as you two continue to grow together, revelations about yourselves have come to light. what you want beyond your inheritances, who you want beyond friendship. you figured out the second part on a faithful night recently. tom showed up to your place with a bottle of tequila. after you drank it down through lots of lime chasers and giggles, he kissed you. you didn’t kiss back.

your heart said to go for it, but your mind pulled you back in. you were so shocked and overcome with new feelings, you froze up. that, and you’d infuriate your mother. although she cares about tom a great deal, she loathes his public figure. he’s always getting papped in places and with people he shouldn’t be. the two of you together would just destroy her.

you still want to please your mom at the end of the day, no matter how deep under your skin she gets.

tom immediately apologized and tried play it off as him being drunk. you grew up with him, became part of each other’s families, which means you know him well enough to know he was lying. he meant every second his lips were on yours.

what you need to do now is something you’ve meant to for a while. the only problem is that you’re stuck at your mother’s party, and tom hasn’t shown up yet.

“y/n, darling,” your mom calls for your attention. she’s dragged you into a conversation with some bloggers, but you haven’t spoken a word. “why don’t you tell us about your trip to spain last summer?” she plasters on her award winning grin and squeezes your shoulder. it’s time to play along.

“oh, it was beautiful,” you halfheartedly reply, more to the bloggers than her. they nod in clear interest. one jots down notes. “we went for a few weeks and visited a bunch of different cities. i’d love to go back sometime.” the typical press formatted answer earns your mom’s approval. you’re off the hook. your eyes start to wander around the room, hoping to set on tom.

“we?” the woman taking notes asks. must everyone pry? “my friend and i,” you shortly reply. you’re standing up on your tiptoes to see over the crowd. you’d think six inch heels would do the trick. “i’m actually looking for him right now, so if you’ll excuse me,” you offer a polite smile and silently pray they won’t ask who. unfortunately, your wishes don’t come true.

the other blogger, a short and stubborn man, speaks up. “just a friend you say? come on, tell us. who’s the lucky fella?” he inquires. your mother raises a firm eyebrow, signaling for you not to.

tom has a reputation for his reckless behavior. it’s your mom’s worst nightmare when the media associates your names under most circumstances. you’re representing her, so she does whatever she can to control how you’re seen. you’re constantly in the papers, being a young socialite and all. it sucks.

“he’d like to stay out of the tabloids, sorry,” you cover for tom, on your mom’s behalf. “i should really go. it was nice meeting you.” the bloggers don’t bother to hide their disappointment as you shake their hands. your mother rubs your back in approval. “thank you for doing that. we’ll talk later,” she speaks lowly. “bye, mom!” you practically make a run for it. 

weaving through the sea of people, you end up by the main entrance. it’s hard not to get lost even though it’s your house. the place is packed with girls just a couple years older than you, wearing pearls around their necks. men’s strong colognes flow through the air. you’re in a form fitting red slip dress and louboutins yourself.

smoke and mirrors is what they call it. you show the pretty parts to distract from your ugly ones.

harrison suddenly comes waltzing in with a lady on either of his arms. you’d expect nothing less. he’s tom’s best friend besides you, considering the failed kiss attempt didn’t change that. their parents worked at the london branch of the same company. they each came to the states and met you. you happily introduced them to your world, helping to make it theirs as well.

“haz!” you meet him at the front door. he’s smirking while he leads the women inside. “fancy seeing you here, isn’t it?” he jokes. “very funny. i died laughing,” you deadpan, curiously eyeing harrison’s plus two. they merely giggle. “listen, have you seen tom anywhere? if he’s coming.” you’re fighting back a frown. “why wouldn’t he be?” harrison questions in a more serious tone this time.

“long story. you have guests to entertain, so i won’t get into it now,” you decide and manage a small smile instead. he perks up. “right. i’ll let you know if i see him?” nodding, you give him a wave goodbye. “enjoy yourself.” “you too, love. cheers!” the girls lean into him, harrison wiggling his eyebrows at you. he’s ridiculous.

hours pass by without word of tom. it isn’t like him to miss an event, especially if you’re in attendance. you despise these exhausting nights, and he’s supposed to be your rock during them. he should have his arm draped around your shoulders, whispering silly remarks to you while you hide out somewhere. you miss him more than you thought possible.

you’re just about to give up when you spot nikki ushering her husband inside. behind them follows tom, clad in a grey checkered suit with his locks perfectly tousled. he’s here. you waited the whole night, and he finally came.

tom kisses his mom on the cheek before strutting over to the drink table, not without a few reporters hassling him. they’re probably looking for another holland scandal to break. he declines their requests for comments on this and opinions on that, instead pulling up a chair next to harrison. the two exchange hugs and fix themselves glasses of champagne, you watching their encounter.

harrison fills tom in on the drama he’s missed tonight while they sip their drinks. tom keeps forcing smiles that don’t reach his eyes. he’s fiddling with his fingers, leg bouncing up and down steadily. those are the telltale signs he needs saving. however awkward it may be, you’re going to have to break your silence. it was bound to happen eventually.

“mate, i’m telling you. she fit her entire first right up her-“ “boys,” you cut into harrison’s story, greeting him and tom. his face tints deep pink upon your arrival. “don’t let me stop you. finish your charming anecdote,” you encourage him and subtly glance over at tom. he’s biting back a grin as he sets his elbows on the table.

“not with a lady present. let’s just… pretend you didn’t hear that,” harrison chuckles nervously and hops to his feet. “i’m gonna leave you two to chat.” humming, you move to take his chair. tom sucks in a breath. “what happened to the girls you brought?” you wonder. “they left. said they got bored,” harrison admits, tom stifling laughter. he elbows his friend for that.

“oh, fuck off. i’ll see you later,” he mopes, flicking your arm for good measure. tom salutes him and grabs his nearly empty champagne. “so long, bruv.”

it’s just you and tom now, seated side by side, silently so. he has no intentions of speaking first. he’s too embarrassed, and you don’t blame him. this is on you. you clear your throat before starting the conversation.

“can i top you off?” you tap the bottom of his glass with a tiny smile. tom shakes his head. “i’m alright, thanks.” he finishes the last sip and sets it down, turning to face you. your smile has vanished. “wasn’t sure you were gonna make it. i’m glad you did,” you change the subject. as if he’s considering the sincerity behind your words, tom furrows his eyebrows.

“mum wanted us to. she dragged me and dad straight off the golf course,” he explains and clasps his hands in his lap. his fingers interlock with each other. you fight off the urge to replace them with yours. “we would’ve been here sooner, but the paps are camped outside.” the hint of a smile forms on his lips, at last. “guess it’s not often you get the town’s finest under one roof.”

“you think i’m one of the town’s finest?” you tease, resting your chin in your palm. something flashes behind tom’s eyes. he looks right into yours, scooting closer. “absolutely. you’re the most eligible bachelorette in this whole building.” you allow a toothy grin to spread across your face. “tommy, stop it. you’re too nice to me.”

the nickname is music to his ears. tom looks you up and down, licking his lips simultaneously. “no, seriously. you look gorgeous,” he muses, you pushing at his chest. he exhales a breathy laugh, and you giggle yourself. “red’s definitely your color.” “reverse card. you wear it way better than i do,” you insist. your fingers tug at the collar of his suit. “too bad you didn’t match me.”

you’re relieved you two can talk like you usually do, light flirting and good vibes. it might not be so hard to put the kiss behind you. well, you can’t go on pretending it didn’t happen. you have to at least discuss the fiasco. tom should know why you didn’t reciprocate, then you can take it from there. whether he still has feelings for you, assuming he ever did, will depend on how that turns out.

“not to ruin the fun, but we still have to talk,” you murmur, tom’s body stiffening across from yours. he’s not sure he’s ready to discuss that. “can it wait? we’re at a party,” tom reminds you, running a hand through his styled locks. “yeah, my mother’s. don’t tell me you’re having a good time,” you playfully chastise him. he simply shrugs. “hardly. you’re the best part.”

you ignore the butterflies roaming about your body.

“you won’t mind a quick convo, then. it is with me,” you attempt to persuade him and place a hand on his knee. tom coughs a bit too loudly, the contact surprising him. “you know what? i think i’ll take you up on that drink first,” he decides with a mustered up smile. “coming right up.” you pat his leg before taking his glass. he chews on his lower lip while you poor the bubbling liquid. that was certainly… odd.

you slide tom his champagne back with an exaggerated wink. tom scoffs at this. “mm, thanks. care to join me?” he brings the alcohol to his lips, eyes never leaving yours. your mother specifically said no drinking tonight, since the press would be here. screw your mother, though. “please. could you hand me a glass?” you eagerly grab the champagne bottle. tom searches for an empty cup next to him.

you two are unspoken drinking buddies at this point.

“here you are, darling,” tom drawls, holding out the glass for you. every time he calls you that, you completely melt. “thanks, tommy,” you purr in response. you’re finally pouring your own drink when someone taps you on the shoulder, and hard. you look behind you to find your mother standing with her hands on her hips, less than thrilled. speak of the devil.

“hello, mother. can i help you?” you make sure to ask rudely. she responds with a smile that’s obviously fake. if tom weren’t here, you’d be getting scolded. “yes, my darling. those bloggers from earlier were hoping you’d finish your interview.” your mom shakes your shoulder in a motherly way. you squint up at her. “didn’t they leave hours ago-“ “they’re back,” she sharply informs you.

she’s lying, and you have a hunch as to why.

frowning, you hold tom’s hand in both of yours. “sorry, this won’t take long. why don’t you go find tuwaine?” you suggest instead. “he’s around here somewhere.” tom gives you an understanding nod and laces your fingers together, even if it’s only for a moment. “must be chatting up some producers or whatnot. i’ll see if i can help.” he’s such an incredible friend to everyone. he deserves the same from you.

“thomas, so lovely to see you,” your mom interrupts. tom stands up, kissing both her cheeks out of courtesy. “you, too. what a wonderful party. thank you for having us.” despite what the rest of the world believes, his manners are impeccable. “of course. give nikki my best, will you?” your mom puts her hands on his shoulders. he grins at her. “definitely. take care, mrs. y/l/n.” “always a pleasure,” she states, nudging you to come along with her.

you shoot tom one last apologetic look as your mother pulls you along and towards the crowd.

tom is no idiot. he’s well aware how she really feels about him.

when a swarm of guests is surrounding you, your mom lets go. you scowl, crossing your arms over your chest. “why would you do that? i haven’t seen tom in days.” she sighs without a care. “isn’t it time you branch out? expand your social circle?” her manicured fingers ruffle your hair. you push away her touch. “i’m social enough. we were in the middle of something really important.”

you begin to walk away, but your mother takes your arm. “whatever you’re about to do, it’s a mistake. he’ll make a fool of you,” she practically spits. yanking your arm from her grasp, you laugh bitterly. “of me, or of the family name? look around, mom.” you gesture to the spot beside her where your dad should be. “as far as i’m concerned, i have no family except tom. i’m gonna go check on him.”

you’re gone before your mom can stop you. she simply stands there, utterly mortified by what you said.

you run around the house to find tom, stumbling in your heels and not giving a fuck. you’d truly meant the part about him being your family. all the holland’s, honestly. they’re the most genuine and caring souls, and you don’t want to lose the one you’re closest to because of your mother’s delusions. 

tom is in a circle with harrison and tuwaine, the three of them chuckling amongst themselves. you’d hate to bug him, but this can’t wait anymore.

“uh, tom?” you mumble his name, appearing behind him. he steps away with another quiet laugh. “hey, y/n/n. that was quick, hm?” your face gives away your distress. his whole demeanor shifting, tom reaches for your hands. “what is it, love? is something the matter?” “just… come with me,” you croak out.

you manage to smile at harrison and tuwaine, dropping one of tom’s hands so you can lead him upstairs. they each return the smile and share curious looks.

following behind you, tom keeps your hand tight in his own. he’d thought you were going to grill him about the kiss that barely happened. it seems like this is a much more pressing matter. his outburst of emotions can be discussed another time. now, it’s time to deal with yours.

you drag tom into the first room on the second floor, which is your dad’s study. he’s away on business this weekend, so he luckily couldn’t make the party. tom sits down in the office chair. you sit up on the desk, in front of him. your lip quivers the second his worried features come into view.

“y/n/n, what’s going on? why are we in here?” tom wonders, his tone soft. your heart clenches. “i- i wanted us to have some privacy when i told you this,” you sniffle out and blink back the tears forming. you’re sort of shaken from the conversation with your mother, and mostly because you have no idea how tom will react to your confession.

his hands come to stay on your thighs, right below your dress. they feel warm against your bare skin.

“tell me what? i’m listening, yeah?” tom gazes up at you with so much love. “lay it all out for me.” god, he’s fucking amazing. if only you knew where to start. “do you, um…” you trail off, letting your tears subside and words settle. “do you remember when your family made your big debut in town?”

a grin replaces tom’s frown, painting his beautiful face. “how could i forget? you made it quite memorable.” he traces circles on your thigh and elicits a giggle from you. “i spilled a whole thing of soda on your white fucking button down,” you recount with a lighthearted sigh. “right before your dad was supposed to introduce you to everyone, too.”

tom presses his tongue into his cheek to hold back another grin. “took ages to get it out. dad went mad when i didn’t show.” he cocks his head to the side, you leaning back on your hands. “you held me hostage in the laundry room so you could do that bloody stain stick.” your mouth drops open in mock offense. “i had to clean up my mess! i wasn’t gonna let the world meet you covered in pepsi.”

that was one of your earliest memories together. the holland’s threw a party and invited everyone who was willing to attend. they had been hoping to properly introduce themselves to the town, and this was their way of doing so. although yours and tom’s friendship was fairly new, you spent all night together because you had experience with such events.

tom’s dad was making a speech to thank the guests for coming. you and him listened from the snack table, until his name was called. he rushed to go up there while you were pouring yourself a drink. he’d bumped into you, and the bottle ended up all over him. you snuck tom right off to his laundry room.

you’d felt terrible as he stood there shirtless and blushing, you aggressively swiping his button down with a stain stick.

“why do you bring that up?” tom questions and continues circling your skin. you purse your lips. “i dunno. it was the last party i actually enjoyed,” you admit, putting your hand over his that rests on your thigh. “like to reminisce when i’m suffering through one of my mother’s.” his eyes shift to where your hands are laced. “i see,” he affirms. “so, is that… all you wanted to talk about?” “not even close,” you laugh out.

a burst of courage coursing through your body, you say it. “when you kissed me the other night-“ “i won’t do it again,” tom cuts in, trying to avoid the rejection he thinks you’ll give him. “it was a mistake, and i’m so sorry. our friendship is more important than my feelings.” you seem excited to hear that, though it’s not for the reason tom expects. “you do have feelings for me?”

he’d forgotten about his i was drunk excuse.

“um, yeah. i do,” he admits, cheeks rosy and lip caught in his teeth. “but, i’ll learn to put them aside, if that’s what’s best.” “no, no. it isn’t,” you dismiss him and put your free hand on his chest. “i love you, tom. that’s what i was really trying to tell you.” your words bring an instant grin to his face. he chuckles in disbelief, standing from the chair.

“fuck, thank god. that’s all i’ve ever wanted to hear.” he’s between your legs now, his hands moving up to your hips. you’re beaming at him as your arms snake around his neck. a burning question comes to tom’s mind. “hang on. why didn’t you kiss me back, then?” he almost whispers, thumb brushing over your hipbone. “this is gonna sound weird, but… my mom,” you reluctantly let out.

“you’re gonna have to elaborate,” tom prompts you and raises an eyebrow. you can’t hold back your eye roll. “she’s never been a fan of the person you are in the media.” his lips form a line. “i gathered.” your fingers tangle in his curls at the nape of his neck reassuringly. “i was subconsciously scared i would be letting her down in some way, if we were together.”

tom allows your hands to work their way up to his scalp. he exhales contentedly as you play with his ever so soft hair. “i understand, she’s intimidating. what’s changed that brilliant mind of yours about coming clean?” your nose scrunches up when he pokes one of your temples. “oh, yeah. i yelled at her earlier ‘cuz she stole me away from you.” his face lights up. “sexy.” “shut up,” you groan. “someone had to tell her off.”

“good thing it got to be you,” tom agrees with a squeeze at your hip. “‘m proud of you, y/n/n. it’s not easy, standing up to mummy dearest.” you tug on his hair. “like you’d know. nikki is a saint.” “that’s what she’ll have you believe,” he says under his breath, you gasping. his lips turn up in a smirk. “on that note… i love you, too.”

“would’ve been embarrassing if you didn’t say it back,” you acknowledge with a cheesy smile. tom dips his head down to rest his forehead against yours. “yeah, yeah. save the attitude for your mum.” your legs easily wrap around his waist, tom’s breath hot as it hits your face. “let’s give that kiss another go,” you mewl. he doesn’t hesitate to reply. “with pleasure.”

tom’s lips land on yours, you kissing back right away. he smiles into it as your lips gently move together. “about fucking time,” he grumbles, your hands situating in his chocolate curls once again. he’s savoring every second you touch him, kiss him, love him. the taste of your mouth is one he’s craved for longer than you could imagine.

it doesn’t take long for things to heat up, you messing with tom’s hair and tom rubbing your hips. you lay back on the desk as his tongue enters your mouth. holding you by your waist, tom hovers over you. his tongue tangles with yours in a deep kiss. between that and his fingers beginning to massage your thigh, you’re done for. you’re ready to take this a step further by the time he’s kissing down your neck.

“tommy?” you grab onto his shoulders, your head back. his lips detach from your skin with a grin. “yeah, love? ‘s everything okay?” he coos, pressing a final kiss to your collarbone. “more than.” you tilt his chin up to peck his lips. “you wouldn’t happen to have a condom, would you? just thinking ahead.” he laughs breathlessly, reaching into his suit pocket.

“conveniently enough, i do. not sure your dad would like me fucking you on his desk, though.” tom sets his hand on your leg that’s still hooked around his waist. “my room’s always available. carry me?” you make grabby hands and bat your lashes. he hoists you up by your waist, not lifting you just yet. “that would break the news of us, no? your mum’s gonna go apeshit.” he keeps his arms around you, chuckling.

“let her. besides, i know a couple of bloggers that would love to announce our status update.” you peck tom’s lips, grinning as you do. you’re suddenly in the air and being picked up by tom. the surprise of it makes you squeal, clutching onto his broad shoulders instinctively. he gives you the look of adoration that’s reserved for you only.

“we’ll go pop a few bottles with everyone, then we’re celebrating on our own.”

#tom holland #richkid!tom #tom holland fluff #tom holland smut #tom holland x reader #tom holland x y/n #tom holland x you #tom holland imagine #tom holland fic #tom holland fanfiction #peter parker #peter parker fluff #peter parker smut #peter parker imagine #peter parker x reader #peter parker x y/n #peter parker x you

[ordinaryschmuck]

Drabble suggestion: amity goes to luz’s house in the human world and Luz shows her her room and amity sees luz’s stuff animals that were on her bed in yl and Luz explains their names and stuff to them and like tells her about them

Memories and Plushies

Luz frantically zoomed around her room with a vacuum, sucking up every little bit of crump she could find.

"I'll admit, I didn't expect you to be so tidy," Vee said from the top bunk, watching her sister work, "Not after seeing the mess here you left for me to take care of."

"I'm normally not," Luz confessed, "But that's because I've never had a girlfriend coming over before. Amity already saw the mess in my room at the Owl House. Can't let her think I'm that much of a slob here."

"I feel like it might be worse that you're more of a slob in a stranger's house than you are in your own home."

Luz opened her mouth to retaliate, but the sound of the doorbell ringing cut her off.

"Oh, my gosh, that's her!" she ran to the mirror, doing some checkups. "How do I look?!"

"Like you always do," Vee rolled her eyes, "You should probably go open the door instead of leaving her waiting like this."

"You're...RIGHT! What am I thinking?!" Luz then bolted out of her room, zoomed down the stairs, and came to a screeching halt at the front door.

"Ok, don't freak out," she whispered to herself. Opening the door, Luz smiled brightly at Amity, who looked nervous as she smiled back.

"Hey, Luz," the witch waved.

"Hi, Amity!" Luz stepped aside and let her girlfriend in, "Welcome to my humble abode. Hope you're not disappointed."

"Well, I've been inside for ten seconds, and I already see a picture of you as a baby. So I say that I'm satisfied."

Luz curiously looked to where Amity was pointing and felt her blood run cold at the picture of a three-year-old Luz having a bubble bath. Instantly, she ran over and flipped it around.

"Ha! That's, uh...that's not for your eyes. Now, um, how about we head up to my room?"

Amity's signature flush grew upon her face.

"You're room? Now? Just the two of us?"

"Actually, Vee's there too. According to my mom, while she trusts me to not do something PG-13, she'd still feel better to have someone keeping an eye on us while she's at work. Vee'll do because it turns out she's older than me by, like, a month."

"Oh, good," Amity breathed a sigh of relief, "Because, um...that seems like too much for me."

"I don't know why," Luz took Amity's hand and led her upstairs. "I mean, you've been in my room a bunch of times at the Owl House."

"I know. But something about being in you're real bedroom, the room you basically grew up in, it...it seems different, I guess."

"Well, I hope it's easy to get through. Because..." Luz presented her bedroom, "Here it is!"

"Oh, wow. It is actually...just about as I would expect it to be," Amity said with a grin.

"Really?"

"Right down to the cute pile of stuffed animals. Although, I would not have predicted the bunk bed. Or the basilisk laying on the top bunk, for that matter."

"Hi," Vee waved in her basilisk form. "Sorry for the appearance. I just thought that this would look less weird than a copy of your girlfriend."

"It does, actually," Amity admitted as she strolled inside, looking at her surroundings.

"You're not disappointed, are you?" Luz asked with a twiddle of her thumbs. Amity chuckled at the apparent nervousness.

"Far from it," she sat down at the bed, waiting as Luz soon followed. "So...what do we do now?"

"Mom said no making out," Vee warned, to which Luz punched the top bunk in response.

"We can do whatever we want," Luz smiled at her girlfriend, "Aside from making out. Mom was very clear about that."

"I bet," Amity picked up a stuffed rabbit with a scarf. "This guy's cute. Does he have a name?"

"Uh, yeah, he has a name," Luz said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. "They all do. Wanna hear them?"

"Sure."

"Well, this little guy is Flopsy," Luz took the rabbit, "Because what else are you going to call a rabbit."

She then picked up the stuffed cow with a missing button eye.

"This is Killer. She got that name because her one eye makes her look cool."

"Why does she only have one eye?" Amity asked.

"It was always missing since my dad bought it for me at a garage sale. In fact, all of these came from him in one way or another."

Luz picked up an orange ghost-looking plush with a blue nose and then a plush jack o'lantern.

"Both of these came from two different fairs," she explained, holding up the ghost first. "Dad won me Danella from the Fourth of July fair when I was eight and bought be Jacko here when I was five, and he took me to a Halloween festival."

Luz then set them aside and picked up the stuffed turtle and snake.

"And when I wanted pets, but Mom didn't think I was ready, Dad bought be Terrance and Ophelia for my sixth birthday party. But it's Jorge that I really appreciate."

Luz picked up the big, white plushy with a greenish-blue face.

"It was the last gift he gave me before leaving. It wasn't for a birthday or even Christmas. He just said that he saw it, thought of me, and bought it because of that."

Amity took notice of the sad look on Luz's face and frowned.

"I don't think I have ever heard you talk about your dad before," the witch said, grabbing her human's hand into her own. Luz smiled at the contact, but it was noticeably lacking in its usual optimism.

"I, um...I don't like to think about it much. The fun times we had are always nice to think about, but it's not too long until they make me feel...I don't know what they make me feel, but I definitely don't like it."

"He sounds like a great man, though."

"He really was...But, sometimes, when I sleep at night with all of these stuffed animals he bought me...I guess...I guess it makes me feel like he's still here."

Luz went to wipe a tear, feeling Amity use a thumb to brush a comforting pattern over her knuckles. It was a peaceful moment between them...ruined by Vee sticking out from the top bunk.

"So that's why Mom looked so flabbergasted at me suggesting I should sell them," she said with a face full of regret, shocking Luz to her core.

"You were going to sell my BABIES!?"

"I didn't know they meant so much to you! Which is why when Camila looked at me that way, I just told her I was joking and put them in the closet. It still got me a weird look, but--"

"YOU PUT MY BABIES IN THE COLD DARK CLOSET!?"

"I'm sorry, ok! What can I do to make it up to you?"

Luz opened her mouth to protest further, but an idea popped into her head.

An idea that made a faint blush glow on her cheeks.

"You could...give Amity and me five minutes together," she suggested, "Alone. Without telling Mom."

Amity blushed as well, looking between both sisters with bated breath.

"..." Vee sighed, climbing down to the floor. "Fine. But only five minutes."

"Deal!" Luz and Amity exclaimed in unison, making both of their blushes grow darker. Vee only rolled her eyes and slithered out the room, shutting the door behind her.

Briefly, Luz and Amity just sat in silence, fiddling with their own fingers and looking anywhere but each other. When they eventually made eye contact, they both grinned excitedly at one another.

Amity was the first to lean in.

"Wait!" Luz protested. As quickly as she could, she then rotated her stuffed animals so that they would all look away from them. "Ok, now we can go."

Amity chuckled at her girlfriend's behavior, leaning in again to make the most of their five minutes.

#the owl house #luz noceda #toh vee #amity blight #lumity #lumity is canon #luz and vee are sisters #the hiatus of drabbles

[mosswillow]

Useless - Dark!Steve Rogers x Reader (part one)

Warnings: 18+ Adult content!, Werewolves, A/B/O, Possessive behavior, Dark, Non con/dub con, Forced marriage, power imbalance, general misogyny, Punishments, smut, violence .

Summary: “Trying to fight this is useless doll, we’ll always end up right back here.” You’re the bottom of the pack, an Omega, and Steve has chosen you for his mate.

A/N: This will probably be two or three parts. Likes, reblogging, comments are always welcome.  

Word count: 3.2k

Present

The forest is cold and dark. Snow drifts down, soaking your coat and chilling you to the bone but you barely notice. All you can think about is getting away. You’ve been running for so long and need a break. You look back, slowing to a brisk walk when you don’t see anything. You can’t stop moving, not until you’re at the edge of your pack's territory, not until you’re safe.

They weren’t expecting you to do it. It’s always been an option but you’ve never actually known anyone who has run. Wolves need and like pack structures, leaving doesn’t even cross most of their minds. You know a few who have mated into other packs but running is unheard of. You’re different though. You've never felt content with the structure or hierarchy. The way you’ve grown up has left you with contempt for pack life. Even still, you would have stayed despite it if it wasn’t for Steve. You don’t want to run from your friends and family, don’t want to leave the life you’ve known since birth. The decision to run was hard but you had to make it.

2 months ago.

“Y/N We need to talk to you,” Your mom tells you over the phone.

“What is it? What happened?”

“Just come over tonight for dinner ok?”

You hang up your phone worried and confused. You see your parents almost every day and already plan on having dinner with them tomorrow. Your mom didn’t sound upset, in fact she seemed excited, but you have the sinking feeling that something is very wrong.

You arrive at your parents house at six, walking in and hanging up your jacket. You always feel calm in your childhood home. It’s familiar and warm. You had the option to stay, most Omegas do, but you wanted to have a place of your own. As soon as you came of age you packed up and moved into your own home on the compound. Getting a little space, as small as it is, has helped you be content with your life.

There’s a nice smell coming from the kitchen and you kick your shoes off and make your way through the house.

“Mom, Dad, I’m here.”

You walk into the kitchen and see him there with them. Steve Rogers.

“Oh, hi Steve. I didn’t know you would be here too.” Your stomach drops.

“Why don’t we sit down.” Your mom says cheerfully.

You sit across from Steve and start eating. It’s a complicated meal that you know took some time to make. You know why this is happening, why Steve is here and why your parents put in extra effort into this dinner. You act like you don’t know though. Maybe if you act dumb he won’t say what you know he’s about to say.

“Steve has some good news.” you father says, looking at you wearily.

“Oh?”

“I made second Alpha.” Steve says.

“Congratulations,” you deadpan. Your tone doesn’t go unnoticed and your parents both shift uncomfortably in their seats.

“Now that it’s official I can finally find a mate.”

“I’m sure you’ll find someone great.”

Everyone stares at you but you act oblivious.

“Y/N It’s you. I pick you.”

You set your fork down, finally dropping the act.You’ve always known Steve has a thing for you. You’ve heard through Alpha friends that Steve has asked more than one Alpha to stay away from you. You’ve made it clear that you aren’t interested in him but it obviously hasn’t dissuaded him. It’s not that you’re not attracted to him or think he’s a bad guy, you just don’t feel ready for any sort of relationship yet. You know that for an Omega getting mated means giving up your autonomy. Alphas don’t take things slowly once they start relationships so you’ve been careful around them not to start anything. Maybe you’ll want to be mated and have pups one day but not yet.

“No thank you.”

“Y/N! I’m sorry Alpha, we thought she was over this.” Your father says.

Steve sets his fork down and leans back in his chair.

“I’m not asking, I'm telling. As a pack leader it’s my right to choose a mate. It’s always been you.”

He’s right, His new standing gives him the right to choose a mate. He can pick you if he wants and there’s nothing you or anyone else can do about it.

“When?”

“Three months.”

You stand and walk away pulling your shoes on quickly and slamming the front door on your way out. Your parents yell and Steve follows behind you, grabbing your forgotten jacket.

“Y/N stop!”

You whip around and glare at him.

“Find a different wolf to mate Steve.”

“No, you’re the one I want.” he crosses his arms and glares right back at you.

“You’re really going to force me to be your mate? You don’t see how fucked up this is?”

“This shouldn’t be a surprise doll, I’ve always made my intentions with you clear.”

“And I’ve made it clear that I’m not interested.”

He lifts his hand to your face wiping away a tear you hadn’t realized you'd shed.

“I don’t get it, why me? You could be with any wolf you want. You could find an Alpha or Beta and be in a power couple or If you wanted someone to do the whole Alpha Omega dynamic thing there are plenty willing Omegas out there.”

Steve bites his bottom lip and grabs you, forcing you into a hug.

“When we were in highschool before I hit my growth spurt and presented as an Alpha everyone thought I would be an Omega, do you remember that?”

“Yes.”

You don’t like thinking about that time in your life. Everyone thought you were going to be an Alpha, including you. You were a confident pup, raised to be a leader. Everything changed when you presented as an Omega and not for the better.

“You were the only one that didn’t bully me back then.”

You pull out of his arms.

“Wait, I was nice to you in highschool so you’re returning the favor by forcing me into a mating bond? What the fuck Steve.”

“It’s not about you, it’s about me. I’ve worked hard for my position in the pack and you’re my reward.”

“I’m not a reward, I'm a person.”

“You’re an Omega.”

“Stay away from me,” you yell. In a moment of pure anger you try, dramatically, to push him over but end up panting against his unmoving body.

You start to shake slightly and Steve holds your jacket open for you.

“Put it on, you’re cold.”

You are cold, but you’re also angry and stubborn. You stare at Steve and clench your jaw. He immediately reacts to the challenge, his body towering over you in a show of dominance. You try to fight against your instincts but they tell you to stand down. He’s your Alpha, even if you weren’t an Omega you would still feel the push to submit to a stronger wolf. You start to waver and finally lower your head. Steve holds the jacket out for you again and this time you put your arms through and zip it up. Steve puts his hand under your chin, gently lifting it until you’re staring at him.

“Trying to fight this is useless doll, we’ll always end up right back here.”

Your body relaxes in defeat and you don’t struggle as Steve puts his arm around you and walks you back to your home. He gives you a kiss on the cheek and waits until you’re inside with the door locked to leave.

Present.

Everyone has the right to run, even Omegas. One chance to make it outside the pack's territory. The rules are that you have to start in the compound, leave after midnight and make it out before sunrise. You can’t use a car or get help from anyone. If you aren’t caught they have to let you go. You will be considered a rogue wolf. You’ll have to find another pack or live like the humans. That’s if you make it out. If you’re caught you will either bare your neck and take any punishment that your Alpha deems necessary or fight one of the pack Alphas, which you know would end up being Steve.

You start running again. You focus on reaching the quickly approaching edge of your pack's territory, ignoring the fact that you can no longer feel your paws due to the snow covered ground. Every step gives you hope. You didn’t tell a soul you were even thinking about leaving but that doesn’t mean nobody noticed. You know Steve has wolves watching you and that’s in addition to the wolves that patrol the woods.

You stop in your tracks when you hear a branch snap. You know they’re here before seeing the group of wolves appear in front of you. They slowly stalk towards you working together to push you away from the border line. You growl and run as fast as you can, trying to get around them. You can see the finish line, you’re so close. You’re tired though and they surround you easily, leaving no way to escape.

1.5 months ago.

You order a drink from the bartender and take a sip. The liquid burns down your throat and your mind feels a little more fuzzy. You come here often with friends. It’s one of the few businesses in town that are completely hidden from the human world, disguised behind a washateria. Wolves from neighboring packs gather here as well as the occasional rogue wolf. It’s generally a good time and tonight is no different.

“He’s here. I told you he’d come.” Wanda says nervously.

You look over to see Steve. His eyes are on you and he’s not even trying to mask his anger a little. Everyone in the bar knows why he’s here, you’re sure at least a few wolves texted him. Even the wolves from other packs shy away from Steve as he takes long strides towards you.

“You’re going to be in so much trouble Y/N.” Natasha says, shaking her head.

“What can I say, I love pissing him off.” you down the rest of your drink, knowing that you probably won't get to stay here much longer.

Steve smiles as he reaches you.

“Y/N.”

You hold your middle finger up toward him and every wolf in the bar goes silent at the display of disrespect. Anyone in the pack would be punished for an action like that and you know exactly what will happen next but don’t care.

Steve acts quickly grabbing the back of your neck and pushing you against the bar.

“Want to try that again?”

He lets you go and motions with his head to the floor. You kneel and look down.

“I’m sorry for my disrespect Alpha.” you say.

Steve crouches in front of you.

“Who is your superior, Omega?”

“You are Alpha.”

“And who do you belong to?”

“You.”

“Stay.”

Steve leaves you kneeling on the floor and orders a drink. He ignores you for a full twenty minutes before reaching down and pulling you up.

“I think you should be getting home now, I’ll drive you.”

You look at your shocked friends and flash a smile before following Steve out of the bar.

Steve takes your hand and pulls you to the alleyway, pushing you against the wall.

“You want to explain yourself?”

“I already apologised.”

Steve pulls his phone out and shows you a video of yourself at the bar twerking while wolves from neighboring packs watch. One walks up to you and flirts and you touch his arm flirting back. You’ve never really been one to show off like that but you’ll do anything if you know it will make Steve angry. You giggle at the sight and Steve growls.

“This looks bad on me, like I can’t control my Omega.”

“You’re welcome to choose a more obedient Omega, one you can control easier.”

“Ah, I see what you’re doing, it’s clever.”

Steve swipes his thumb over your lips.

“You think you can play games with me…”

He pushes his thumb into your mouth slowly.

“but you forget…”

Steve pulls his hand back and places it over your throat.

“Alphas are really good at games...”

He leans in and nibbles on your ear.

“And we always win,” he whispers

Steve lets you go and steps back, holding out his hand for you to take.

“Come.”

Present

Steve shifts into his human form and takes a few steps toward you.

“It’s over Y/N.”

You growl at him and move into a protective stance.

“I know it’s your right but I don’t want to fight you, if you just submit we can end this little rebellion now and go home.”

You stand your ground unwilling to go down without a fight. You know that the fight will leave you more physically hurt than if you submitted and took the punishment but you have to try. If you beat Steve they’ll let you go. You can’t live your life wondering what would have happened even if the chances of you winning are slim. Maybe he’ll get hit by lightning, you never know.

Steve sighs. “I guess we’re doing this.”

One month ago

You fill a cup of coffee and hand it to a customer. You’ve been working at a coffee shop in town since you were a teen and love it. You wipe down the espresso machine and check your watch. Only a few minutes until your shift ends. You hear the jingle of bells that mean a new customer is here and your heart drops as Steve walks in. He walks to the counter and smiles at you.

“Can I get a mocha?”

You roll your eyes and make him his coffee. Steve's face hardens at your attitude and you smirk knowing he can’t do anything here, in a shop where humans visit. You hand him his drink and head to the back to clock out.

“What do you want?” you ask as you walk out of work and to your car.

Steve walks ahead of you and leans against the drivers side door. He raises an eyebrow.

“You’re on thin ice Y/N and not just with me. You’re very close to having town privileges taken away.”

“Why?”

“Why do you think?”

“If I was an Alpha nobody would care about my - ” you pause “ - rebellious spirit.”

Steve sets his coffee on top of your car and grabs your wrists in one hand and holds them against himself.

“If you can pull even one hand out of my grip I won’t force you to mate me.”

You know what he’s doing but you pull against him anyways trying to get your arms free. it’s no use. He doesn’t even seem like he’s trying and you give up after only a few minutes. He finally lets your arms go and flips you so your back is against the car. He puts his arms on either side of you and leans in slightly.

“The hierarchy is here for a reason, the sooner you accept it the sooner you can be happy.”

You reach up and grab his hot coffee from behind you throwing it in his face. You immediately regret the decision as he slams his body against you. He grabs your arm so hard you cry out in pain. A car full of  humans parks next to you and Steve let's go.

“Hey, Are you ok ma'am?”

“I’m fine, thank you.” You smile.

When they leave Steve opens your car door and pushes you in.

“Go home.”

You

Present

Steve shifts back to his wolf and sits down several feet away from you. You lunge for him, getting a bite in and he throws you off. You hit a nearby tree and lie on the ground for a minute before standing and lunging again. He bites you and slams you down and again you stand swaying a bit. You keep going over and over attacking and being thrown against the ground or trees. The Alpha and Beta wolves that have been watching start whimpering at the sight. Several shift into humans to beg you to stop. Steve paces between rounds and you can tell he’s extremely upset with the whole ordeal. Eventually you’re so bruised and battered you have no choice but to bare your neck and submit.

Three weeks ago

You run around your home getting ready for tonight. You’re usually excited for parties. You like when the whole pack gets together. That was before though. You haven't seen Steve since the incident at work and the lack of communication makes you nervous.

You take a deep breath before opening your door. Steve is waiting for you on your porch and looks you up and down before pushing you inside.

“What?”

“Sit.”

You roll your eyes and sit on the couch crossing your arms and Steve stands in front of you.

“Your behavior has gotten out of control.”

You bite your tongue in an attempt to stop yourself from saying something you’ll regret.

“We’re taking away your town privileges.”

“What about work?”

“I was going to have you quit after we mate anyway.”

You bury your emotions knowing that acting out in any way will just make everything worse.

“Let’s just go,” you finally say.

Steve puts his arms around you as you walk to the party. Nothing you’ve tried has worked to dissuade him from claiming you. The crazy part is that you don’t even hate him. Your heart flutters when he’s near. You disgusted with yourself for loving the attention. If he had waited you probably would have accepted his advances. He forced you though. Everyone thinks you’re being ridiculous and sometimes you agree but you just can’t bring yourself to give up. You know what you have to do now, what your only choice is if you want freedom. You have to run.

Present

You shiver in the snow, barely conscious. Steve wraps a blanket around you and lifts you into his arms.

“What am I going to do with you? My strong little Omega.” His voice cracks. It’s the first time you’ve heard actual emotion in it.

You drift in and out of consciousness as he carries you to a nearby car parked off road. He drives you back to the compound. The entire pack is silently waiting for you. Your mom cries when she sees your body and your dad won’t even look at you. Steve doesn’t carry you to your home like you expect and instead brings you to his. He lies you in his bed and covers you with several warm blankets before leaving you to sleep.

You failed.

Steve was right, you’ll always end up right back here.

PART TWO

#dark #dark!fic #dark steve x reader #dark steve rogers #dark steve x you #alpha!steve #alpha!steve rogers #omega!reader #Werewolf!Steve Rogers

[binniebutter]

and they were roommates...

Pairing: Theatre Major!Jisung x Minho x Theatre Major!Reader

Genre: angst, fluff; roommate au; college au (bye idk what genre this is)

Word Count: 1.2k

Warnings: none

Summary: Minho likes Jisung. You know that. So why did Minho just catch you kissing him?

a/n: there will definitely be a part two to this I swear

If someone had told Minho a year ago that he'd be sharing an on-campus dorm with a girl, he would’ve laughed in their face. But now, Minho could proudly say that he had a female roommate.

And he loved you. 

Platonically of course. He was pretty sure that you’re his platonic soulmate. You understand him better than he understands himself. You know exactly when he’s feeling down and know just the right thing to cheer him up. He feels like he can confide in you about anything and everything. You’re a shoulder that he can lean on, his light in the dark. He feels safe with you and he can confidently say that you’re his best friend (he only says that when Jisung’s not around though).

“Minho? Minhooo? Hello, earth to Minho,” you said loudly, poking his bicep repeatedly. He quickly shook his head, focusing his attention back on you. Once you saw that his focus was on you again, you stopped poking him, instead raising your finger to point at him. “You were thinking about Jisung again weren’t you?” you loudly accused. Minho’s eyes widened as he quickly shushed you, reaching out to lower your finger.

“Shush. We’re in a library, Y/n.”

It’s no secret that Minho has a crush on Jisung. Everyone and their mother is aware of Minho’s infatuation with the theatre major. Especially you. You’re the one that Minho goes to gush to when Jisung gets a haircut that makes him look immaculate or when Jisung wears an outfit that Minho has never seen on him before. And it kills you. Why? Cause you are in love with your roommate.

“It’s not like I’m wrong though. You’re probably thinking about Jisung’s hair or… his teeth or something.” At that, Minho gave you a disgusted look. “Oh don’t look at me like that, it’s a thing.”

“Ok… well you’re wrong. I wasn’t thinking about Jisung,” he said, ignoring the small ‘for the first time in forever’ that you muttered, “I was thinking about you. And how lucky I am to have you.” If Minho hadn’t had been looking at his textbook while saying these words, you were sure he would’ve noticed the way your cheeks flushed.

“What, you have a crush on me Lee?” you teased, thanking every god out there that your voice didn’t waver. Minho scoffed and you would be lying if that didn’t hurt your heart a little bit. 

“Please, as if. Now what were you saying?” 

Now, Minho tried. He really did try to listen to what you were telling him but when you mentioned Jisung, he was a goner. He thought about the talented boy and his squirrel-like cheeks. His eyes that always shined so bright while on stage. His smile that made Minho’s heart skip multiple beats at a time. God did he want to be the reason that  Han Jisung smiles.

You poked your head into Minho’s room, knocking on the wood of his door. Minho was at his desk on his laptop, headphones on, probably editing a video and you rolled your eyes. He was always working and you told him time and time again to take breaks every once in a while but he never did. You walked into the room fully, pulling off his headphones causing Minho to look at you in confusion.

“Did you need something, Y/n?” he asked, looking at you with softness in his eyes. You got lost looking into his brown orbs, something that you caught yourself doing often. You shook your head, slapping yourself lightly to focus, which caused Minho to look at you concerningly. You cleared your throat loudly, hoping to draw the attention away from your weird behavior.

“Mhm. Uh no, I don’t need anything. I just wanted to tell you that Jisung is coming over soon to work on a project.” His ears visibly perked up at the mention of Jisung and you internally rolled your eyes. “We’ll be in my room, so don’t interrupt us.” With that you exited the room, being careful so as to not slam the door because you know of Minho’s fear of loud noises. Minho smiled at your consideration, before putting his headphones back over his ears and continuing on with his editing.

It wasn’t until two hours later that Minho finally allowed himself a break. He turned in his chair, stretching his arms and legs. He caught sight of his figure in the mirror across the room and, unconsciously, smiled while thinking  back to the time when you told him that he looked like a cat while stretching. You were right, he does kinda look like a cat. He stood up from his seat, making a mental note to facetime his mom later and see Soonie, Doongie, and Dori, and walked out of his room.

His first thought was to go to the kitchen but he halted his feet as he heard laughter coming from your room. He then remembered that Jisung was over and immediately made to open the door, dismissing the warning in his head.

“I like you, Ji. I really like you. And I hope you like me too.” Minho froze as those words reached his ears. What? Y/n? He leaned his ear closer to the door in order to hear better. When he didn’t hear anything else, he quickly opened the door to your room but immediately regretted doing so after.

You and Jisung were sitting on your bed, knees touching, and lips interlocked. Your arms were draped over Jisung’s shoulders, your hands playing with the hairs at the nape of his neck. Jisung’s hands were settled on your waist and tears filled Minho’s eyes at the sight. The two of you broke apart quickly when he barged in and his anger boiled when you didn’t even look guilty. You even had the audacity to smile at him. You opened your mouth to say something but he quickly spoke, interrupting whatever you were gonna say.

“I’m so sorry for interrupting. I’ll go back to my room now.” Minho quickly turned around before you could say anything, walking out of the room and unintentionally slamming the door on his way out. Or maybe it was intentionally. He made his way to the front door quickly putting on his shoes and grabbing his keys. Before he left the dorm, a thought dawned upon him. 

The living room. You always use the living room when you have project partners or group mates over. So why… 

He now knows why. 

You like Jisung.

 And Jisung likes you.

Anger coursed through his veins at the realization.

“What’s up with him?” Jisung asked you back in the dorm. You stared at the door that Minho just walked through, your eyebrows furrowed and your eyes narrowed in concern.

“I don’t know. I really don’t know.” Jisung saw how worried you were and tried to get your mind off of it.

“Well then, Ms. Cho-Hee. Let’s get back to it, shall we,” he said while extending his hand out to you. You giggled at the use of your character’s name, grabbing the hand offered to you.

“Yes, Mr. Ji-Hoon. We shall,” you answered, grabbing your script from off of your bed.

uh so, do you like it?

SKZ Masterlist

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#stray kids #kpopscape #stayhavennet #stray kids x reader #lee minho x reader #minsung #minho x reader #lee know x reader #stray kids imagines #stray kids imagine #stray kids fic #stray kids fluff #stray kids angst #stray kids scenarios #stray kids x you #skz #skz minho #stray kids minho #stray kids lee know #lee know #stray kids au #lee know imagines #minho fic #stray kids ff #han jisung #lee minho x you #han #han x reader #jisung x reader #minho x jisung

[longitudinalwaveme]

Worst Flash Storylines and Plot Ideas of All Time

As you’ve probably ascertained from the general contents of this blog, the Flash is my favorite comic book series. I love the characters and most of the stories. However, just like any series that’s been around for eighty years (counting the Jay Garrick stuff), the Flash does, unfortunately, have some truly terrible stories and plot ideas. 

In terms of terrible plot ideas that didn’t completely ruin the surrounding stories: 

1. Barry Allen uses the Mirror Master’s mirrors to manipulate Iris into agreeing to start dating him again (Flash #109). Creepy, Barry. Just creepy. The story is great Silver Age fun otherwise. 

2. Iris West: meanest woman alive. Iris was, by and large, incredibly awful to Barry up until maybe about a year before their 1966 marriage. Almost every time she shows up in an early Silver Age issue, you will admire her daring and independence (this is good) and be bewildered as to why on Earth Barry would want to spend time with a woman who is constantly calling him slow, lazy, and ambition-less (this is not good). It doesn’t really affect any one issue too much, but when read in a conglomerate, she starts looking really awful. Although as bad as Early Silver Age Iris seems as a romantic interest, she’s got nothing on Silver Age Superman and Lois Lane, the most dysfunctional couple in the DCU. 

3. Wally West’s zero-effort code name and costume (Flash #110). It really could not be more obvious how little effort the writers were putting into creating this character. The duplicate origin is also pretty cheesy, but there are enough differences from Barry’s origin for it not to frustrate me. But the name “Kid Flash” and the fact that his first costume was literally identical to Barry’s just feel incredibly lazy. Barry and Wally do have an adorable dynamic in the issue, though, so it’s by no means all bad. 

4. Barry Allen waiting an entire year after his marriage to tell his wife that he’s really the Flash. Frustrating and unnecessary; especially since Joan Garrick had been in on her husband’s secret since the 1940s. 

5. Iris Allen is FROM THE FUTURE. I both love and hate this idea. It’s so perfectly comic-booky, but at the same time, it opened the floodgates for the Allen family being a confusing, time-displaced mess. 

6. The Trial of Barry Allen. This one’s weird. I like many of the individual issues in this arc, and I actually think the last two issues are really great as an ending for Barry Allen’s original run, but this storyline dragged on for waaaaaay too long. There’s a reason I call it the Arc that Never Ends. Also, the titular trial is actually the least interesting part of the entire storyline. His battles with the Rogues and Kadabra are far more interesting. 

7. Wally West’s borderline creepy, chauvinistic attitude towards women under Mike Baron (and, to a much lesser extent, William Messner-Loebs). There’s being a hormonal twenty-something, and then there’s going through girlfriends at the rate other people change their socks. Messner-Loebs mostly avoided this issue by making it clear that Wally was under intense psychological stress that was negatively impacting his behavior, but under Baron and in some of his JLE appearances, he comes across as a real creep around women. 

8. Kadabra overkill under Mark Waid: I like Kadabra, but when he’s the main villain in like four distinct arcs, it gets to be a bit much. It’s like modern Eobard. He is legitimately written well, though, so he doesn’t drag down any of the stories too much. 

9. Pointlessly Dead Rogues: Killing off the Rogues in Underworld Unleashed for no good reason (the rest of the story is great, especially the Trickster). 

10. Pointlessly Dead Rogues 2: Electric Boogaloo: The Golden Glider’s pointless death to build up a character who was himself killed two issues later. (The rest of the story is decent.) Also, the treatment of Lisa in general post-Crisis is frustrating, since she becomes considerably more unhinged than she was before. 

11. Any time Waid tried to write McCulloch, with the exception of Flash vol. 2 #105 (and even there, he seemed off). It’s like he forgot Evan wasn’t Sam. 

12. Apparently, the Top trying to blow up both Central City and half the world makes him a loser? Also, he suddenly hates Piper for no readily apparent reason. (At least the story had some good Piper and Wally bits.) 

13. BARRY ALLEN HAS A SECRET EVIL TWIN! DUN DUN DUN! (The rest of the story, where we get to meet a whole whack of interesting future Flashes, is actually pretty good, but whoo boy, the Malcolm reveal feels like it came straight out of a soap opera.) 

14. In order for Captain Cold to ANGST, the Golden Glider’s pointless death remained in place for over ten years. It did give us a really, really good Capt. Cold story, at least...but it’s still fridging. 

15. Rainbow Raider’s mean-spirited murder by Blacksmith. Poor Roy. 

16. Albert Desmond becomes Hannibal Lecter, only twenty times as rude, for a Gotham Central arc that would’ve been terrific without him as the main villain. 

17. Owen Mercer is an idiotic child murderer and gets killed by the Rogues. Why was this necessary? (The rest of Blackest Night: The Flash is pretty good.) 

18. Josh Jackam-Mardon’s murder. The murder of small children for shock value is pretty gross. Especially since nothing was ever really done with it. 

19. Barry’s PARENTS ARE DEEEEAAAAD! (Okay, it’s really just his mom, but still. This is a very frustrating retcon, since originally his parents were alive and well until after his own death.) 

20. Albert Desmond was Barry’s jerk coworker; which never impacted the plot or led to anything. As a result, it’s just another frustrating retcon. 

21. Sam Scudder murdered someone before becoming the Mirror Master. Yet another Johns retcon that never went anywhere and only serves to darken the Silver and Bronze Age stories after the fact. 

22. Flashpoint (a decent story) wiped out a whole bunch of characters I really liked from existence for several years. Evan McCulloch’s still not back. 

23. Giving the Rogues metahuman powers doesn’t suit them, on the whole. They work better without them. 

24. Roy’s second pointless, brutal death in (I think) Forever Evil. 

25. IT WAS MEEEEE, BARRY! After serving as the main villain for like six arcs in eight years, I’m glad that Eobard finally seems to be getting a rest. The level of bad things he was responsible for was getting ridiculous. 

26. Sam/Lisa. WHY? (The only time it even kind of worked was in Forever Evil.) 

In terms of entire storylines I didn’t like: 

1. The Flash: The Most Terribly Written Man Alive. Poor Bart is aged up with no adequate explanation, loses all the traits that made him a likeable character, fights some awful villains, and then is murdered by the badly OOC Rogues. Meanwhile, Inertia goes from an at least somewhat sympathetic villain to a complete psychopath with little explanation, a murder is retconned into one of Captain Cold’s reformed periods, the Pied Piper and the Trickster completely forget that they’re supposed to be reformed, Abra Kadabra inexplicably teams up with the Rogues despite generally being a solo operative, and all of the Rogues act like total morons, willingly following a teenage speedster for no adequately explained reason. UGH. 

2. Countdown to Infinite Crisis: Even though Piper and Trickster were probably the best part of Countdown, that isn’t saying much. Both of them are uncharacteristically stupid (especially James), and James is a grade-A jerk to Piper for no reason. Also, both of them continue to forget that they reformed, and then James gets brutally murdered and Piper almost loses his mind. Also, the other Rogues cameo, and continue to act like idiots. Countdown: it really does ruin everything it touches. 

Superboy Prime will kill you! He’ll kill you to DEATH! And after you read Countdown, you’ll wish he had killed you to death. 

3. The Identity Crisis Tie-In Retcon: So, you know all that awesome character development the Rogues have had over the years? Well, forget all that, because it was all just Roscoe brainwashing them! Which was something he could definitely do before this story! And why did he do this? Why, because Barry Allen, one of the most upstanding men in the DCU, brainwashed him! Also, apparently, the Top had a huge bodycount that we never heard about back in the Bronze Age, because we need even MORE grimdark retcons for our cheerful Silver/Bronze Age history! I like Geoff Johns’ work, I really do....but BOY HOWDY does he need to lay off on the retcons sometimes. 

4. Identity Crisis: With the exception of Owen’s introduction and the establishment of the relationship between him and Digger, this story was pretty awful all around. More specifically, as far as the Flash was concerned, it was responsible for Digger’s second pointless death. It also killed off poor Jack Drake and poor, mistreated Sue Dibney, who deserved MUCH better. And the Justice League, including Barry, are A-OK with brainwashing, apparently. Comics are fun! 

These last two stories are pretty recent, and they did have some parts I liked, but on the whole I felt they also belonged on the list. 

5. The Trickster finally returns! Hurrah! Except it turns out that he’s way more like the Joker now than he ever was before, and he mind-controls the city in a super-creepy way. A very disappointing return for the character, especially since it was set up really well. 

6. Forever Evil: Captain Cold becomes a murderous dictator with a stupid Santa Beard, all of the Rogues get horrible costumes, and Sam completes his mutation into Evan-in-all-but-name. There are some good characters bits in the story (even for Cold), but on the whole, I found the story to just be unlikeable and depressing and thought Cold was pretty out-of-character. Poor Commander Cold....

So, what are your least favorite Flash storylines and plot ideas? 

#flash comics #flash rogues #dc comics

[reidetic]

The Pantheon: The War or The World? - A.H

A/N: This is the second installment in ‘The Pantheon’ series. You can find the first, Golden, here. Big shout out to @zhuzhubii for their dialogue help and @ontheoddoccasioniwritestuff and a discord friend (who’s tumblr I cannot tag fsm) for beta-ing both stages of this fic. This about to get real dark, y’all. Heed the content warnings.

CW/TW: Murder, violence, general angst, did you hear me about murder?

Couple: None, gen fic.

Category: Angst

Word Count: 1.8k

War. Violence. Anger, malevolence, fury. Aaron was familiar enough with them all. Over a decade in the Behavioral Analysis Unit and he had seen nothing but the wrath of mankind, spilled over from held tongues. Everything stems from fear and terror, and he would go to the grave swearing he fathered the abstract. He felt he left destruction behind him in a wake of combat, and failed to keep his fists from their fury. 

He hadn’t held his rage against Foyet, and it terrified him to no end that he held no regrets about it. If you spend your waking hours chasing the entities of psychopathy, do you not worry that one stumble will place you among the pack? Will the darkness that now inhabits him be his fall from grace? What would he teach his son about the world if he collapsed beneath it? 

He’d be lying to himself if he said the pressure only began after she left. Aaron knew a lot of things when he was young, but the lesson he never quite learned was how to slow down, and life stepped in quickly enough. Her name on his lips burned like fire for months after, only ever calling her Mom to Jack, never once braving the knowledge that the only woman he had given a piece of himself to was now gone, and he had absolutely no one to blame but himself. He still remembers the grip of Derek’s hands around his arms as he pulled him away from the fatality beneath him, still remembers the blood staining his fingernails. There is only so much evil soap can erase. 

Sometimes he felt like the Devil studied the blueprints of his life for ideas, and then he remembered that it’s only him that creates the wars waging on the homefront. How long can he sit here in the dark, touching the floor in their home where his wife’s blood stained the wood? He hadn’t been here in years, but he needed to be here, he needed to feel her again. The blonde underneath him wasn’t Haley, no, but she was close enough. She bore just enough resemblance to his wife and son to justify stealing her away, but just was different enough to let his fist close around her throat. Too fragile to fight him off, she never stood a chance, not when he’s creating his own bloodshed. The blood running from her eyebrow where his wedding ring had sliced her skin open simply pushes him over the edge, and when her body stops writhing under his closed hand, he realizes he has no idea what her name is. 

Maybe he was born with this brutality, perhaps he never stood a chance against the test of time. After all, he wasn’t just chasing killers, he was learning from them too. Cold, calculated, planned. Premeditated, wasn’t that what they called it? He watched her for weeks, needed to know that she would fulfill his fantasy, his need. He made sure she was alone, no children or husbands left behind. Not just to eliminate witnesses, but because Aaron had been on the side of that losing fight. He wouldn’t wish it on his worst enemy. This is just his conflict, this is just his deserved combat. No one would be surprised if he snapped, would they? It was all he knew, it was ever-consuming and at the end of it, he’d be lucky to have even a fragment of a soul left. Emily had warned him once about keeping everything so far shoved down that you lose the ability to distinguish between yourself and your trauma.

There was so much darkness, so much fear. He was so tired of holding everything on his shoulders. So he found a way to put it down, he found a way to try to heal. He had to make it right. He had to give Haley another chance to die, and maybe this time it would be right. 

--

There hadn’t been a break in this case for months. Women disappearing then reappearing mangled and murdered, always a different MO, their only common thread was victimology. Blonde single women, never anyone to miss them other than their work. 

“Hey, I hate to say this but...these women, they all look like Haley.” JJ says tentatively, glancing at the tacked up photos of the victims.

An unnerving quiet falls over the room as the team looks at JJ, a mixture of resignation and horror painting their faces. 

Rossi nods with a pained look. “They do. And...Aaron fits the profile.”

Spencer looks up and adds quietly, “And he took off work for three weeks when the killings started.”

“No, he wouldn’t. Not Hotch.” Morgan stands and shakes his head. “I still think it’s Evans.” 

Rossi sighs. “Evans has an alibi, Morgan. Aaron doesn’t.” 

Morgan scoffs, looking to anyone for help and settles on Emily. “Prentiss, you really believe this?”

She sighs, looks up at him and says, “I’m sorry Derek, he fits the profile perfectly. We always say profilers make the best unsubs.”

“Damn the profile! They can be wrong. We’ve been wrong before.” Morgan pleads, looking around the room for someone on his side.

“Look, why don’t we just go to his house? If I’m right, then we bring him in. If we’re wrong, then we’re just checking on him. Okay?” JJ reasons.

“You can waste your time all you want, but I’m going to talk to Evans.” Morgan seethes, looking to Spencer. “You coming with me, kid?” Spencer just nods, throws JJ an apologetic glance, and grabs his jacket and vest, following Morgan out of the room.

“I’ll go with you, JJ. Prentiss, stay behind and keep in contact with Garcia, just in case.” Rossi instructs. JJ nods, and they head in the opposite direction of Morgan and Spencer, and JJ prays she’s wrong about this.  

--

Prying open the door to Hotch’s house, JJ shakes her head. This isn’t how she wanted this to end. She tiptoes through the room, Rossi following behind her while they work to clear the area. As they go upstairs, she starts to hear crying.

Toeing open the bedroom door, JJ calls through, “Hotch?” She sees him, hunched over a blonde woman, blood pooling on the carpet between his knees. “Hotch!” He still isn’t responding, sobs wracking through his body. “...Aaron?” She tries, pitching her voice down. 

He turns to look at her then, no sign of recognition on his face. He looks broken and battered. He still doesn’t look like a murderer.

Meeting his eyes, she says, “Aaron, it’s JJ. We can help you but I need you to put the knife down.” The heart beating inside her chest is so much less scared than it is breaking in half to watch this man she called family die. 

He turns to her, blood on his outstretched hands and a sad smile on his face. “You’re here, you’re finally here.” 

Confused, JJ cocks her head to the side, gun still trained on him.“I’m...here?” She asks.

He lurches towards her, knife in hand.“I missed you so much.” He swipes a blood covered hand under his eye to wipe away the tears, and JJ’s stomach curdles at the sight.

Rossi takes a step forward to meet JJ, and says quietly, “Aaron, stay back.” Hotch doesn’t seem to hear him, staring directly at JJ.

Unsure of what’s happening, JJ decides to lean into it, in the hopes that making him feel understood would avoid casualties. “I...missed you too.”

He gestures behind him to the still body, and says, “I did it, see? I finally got it right!” He’s shouting, and his happiness is unnerving.

JJ steps forward a little, staring at him. “Aaron...I’m sorry, but I don't understand. Could you...explain it to me?” Maybe even in this state, he’s still sane enough to be logical. Maybe.

Hotch barks a bitter laugh, “Foyet, he didn’t do it right. He…disgraced you.” You? All of a sudden JJ realizes what’s happening and she chokes back tears. She’s not Haley, but she can be for a minute if it protects him.

She softens her voice, holsters her gun and steps forward with her hands up. “I’m...I’m here now. And I've missed you so much. Why don't you put the knife down, and then-”

He shakes his head violently, sweat and tears flying off his face.“It’s too late.” He’s muttering to himself and JJ can’t understand the words under his breath.

JJ swallows thickly. “What do you mean? I’m here, it’s ok-” 

He cuts her off abruptly, waving the knife at the girl behind him dismissively. “She's already gone. She’s already gone.” He looks up through tears and smiles sadly at JJ, at the figure of his late wife in front of him. “...I got you back, though. You're here. You're here and I...-” He breaks down in sobs, sinking to his knees and clutching the knife to his chest. 

 JJ steps closer, looking down at him in pity. “That's right, I’m here. And everything will be okay, I just need you to put the knife down. Can you do that for me, Aaron? Put the knife down.”

He looks up at her, dropping the knife to the floor with a loud clatter and JJ drops to her knees, wrapping her arms around the broken man before her and they’re both crying. “I’m so sorry, Haley.” She just shushes him, pulling him up to his feet.

“I gotta cuff you now, Hotch. It’s for your own good.” Rossi has tears in his eyes, pulling the silver metal from his belt and clasping it around Hotch’s wrists. It’s then that the illusion shatters, and he sees what he’s done. JJ leans down and presses her fingers to the inside of the girl’s wrist, searching for a pulse, but it’s useless. Like he said, it was too late. She was already gone. 

“JJ?” Hotch asks pitifully. “What did I do?” He looks so tired, so crushed.

“I don’t know, Aaron. But we’ll fix it.” She’s still got slow tears rolling down her cheeks, and she takes him from Rossi, guiding him down the stairs and out the front door where the rest of the team is waiting, the looks on their faces a mixture of fear and disgust and pity.

War was ever-consuming. War within, war in the world he struggled to hold up on his shoulders. He could never decide if he saw himself more as Ares or Atlas, never could deify himself in the way he was expected to. Head of the unit, head of his remaining household, head of his world. And yet, he chose war every time. This time, the blood on his fingertips was no longer metaphorical, but the weight of the world fell off. As he’s pulled away from his home, he sees JJ and Jessica huddled over his son, and he wonders if what he’s done is worth the weightlessness. 

taglist: @ontheoddoccasioniwritestuff @andiebeaword @dreatine​ @muffin-cup​ @httpnxtt​ @sunlight-moonrise​  @samanddeanstolethetardis221b​ @spencer-reid-in-a-pool​ @fanficlibrary82​ @zhuzhubii​ @prettyricky187​ @reidlusts​ 

#criminal minds fanfic #aaraon hotchner #aaron hotch fanfiction #hotch fanfiction #criminal minds gen fic #unsub!hotch #dark!hotch

[fan-fic-writer]

Pinky Promise | Aone x Reader | Part 2

!!!!Trigger warning!!!! This chapter has several mentions of depression, self-harm, and bullying!!! If any of that makes you uncomfortable or is a trigger for you, please do not read this chapter!! I put a warning before the self-harm mention, but the bullying and (implied) depression is mentioned several times throughout this chapter. My DMs are always open if you need someone to talk to, I will always support you guys, no matter what!!!!!

~

~

You know what they say, a pinky promise can never be broken.

Middle school was never easy, no matter who you were. Your middle school years are when you get the meanest and you lose friends and make friends that would last forever. You would know because you had lost the one friend you needed most when your parents sent you to a private middle school in an attempt to make friends other than Takanobu. It’s not like they didn’t like him, in fact, they saw him as a fourth child(probably a good time to mention that you do have an older brother and a younger brother). They just wanted you to make other friends, so you weren’t so reliant on the gentle giant.

“Welcome back,” your homeroom teacher for your final year stood at the front of the room, “I am Takashi Ito, you will call me Mr. Ito or sensei. This is your final year here and Dobutsu Academy, and I won’t be going easy on you because of it. Now how about everyone introduces themselves. No volunteers, I guess I’ll have to call on someone.” The teacher looked around the class as students avoided eye contact, but you weren’t able to dodge his piercing gaze fast enough as you made eye contact, “You, with the h/c hair,” you pointed to yourself in a silent question, “Yes you. Now stand up and give us your name and an interesting fact about yourself.”

You could feel the eyes of everyone glued onto you even as you keep your head down. You tugged at the sleeves of your uniform as you slowly stood up, “U-uh, m-my name is Y/N L/N a-and I don’t h-have an interesting fact about m-myself…” Your voice was just loud enough for everyone to hear you. You could feel your face heat up, feeling the eyes of your classmates burned into your body.

“Everyone has an interesting fact about themselves, you have no reason to not share like the rest of the class will. So I’m sure you’ll be able to think of something.” the smile on his face contradicted the assertive look in his eyes, “Quickly now, don’t keep us waiting.”

You got more self cautious as you tried to come up with something when something popped into your head, “I, uh… I-I’m fluent in sign language, I have a friend who is a selective mute, so we learned it when we were younger…” your voice trails off, getting quieter as you answered. I shouldn’t have added the part about Nobu. I overshared. Oh god, they’re going to think I’m stupid or something! You silently panicked.

“Now that wasn’t too hard was it. I would love to see you apply that skill during class, maybe starting a club? You may sit down.” You immediately dropped to your chair, fiddling with the sleeves of your uniform again, “Alright, who would like to go next- black hair, glasses seat three of row three. Since you thought having a conversation with your neighbor was more important than whatever I have to say, how about you go next. Just like Ms. L/N.”

That’s what most of homeroom was like, classmates introducing themselves and talking amongst the already established friend groups. You on the other hand sat in the back of the class, book in hand, peacefully reading while the noise only got louder and louder. Your ears were used to silence, that’s what came with being friends with Takanobu, the comfortable quiet. You’d think you would be used to this much noise from having brothers and being in noisy classrooms for most of the day, but every time you would get used to it, the quiet time you would spend with the silent boy would bring you back to that comfortable quiet, making you start at square one.

You stood up, the noise finally being too much to handle you made your way to the front of the class, towards the teacher’s desk, “S-sir. C-can I sit in the hallway for the rest of class?” you nervously fiddled with the hem of your skirt as you asked Mr. Ito to leave the room.

“And why would you need to leave the room? Everyone is enjoying themselves talking, but you’re sitting with your face in a book. Do you simply wish to leave so you can read your book without distraction? Talk to someone, make a friend, Ms. L/N.” The man responded, typing away at his computer.

“M-my ears are sensitive to loud noise sir. I don’t come from a very loud home or friend group so loud noises tend to overwhelm me, m-may I please sit out in the hallway?” Sure, having brothers can be loud, but when one is four years older than you, and the other is twelve years younger than you, it doesn’t tend to get very crazy at home.

Letting out a sigh, the man scribbles something on a piece of paper, probably a note in case a teacher sees me in the hallway. He handed you the slip of paper and nodded at the door to the classroom as a silent go-ahead, “Be back in here before class ends,” was all he said before he went back to typing on his computer.

~~~~~~~~

That’s when the bullying started. 

Your classmates saw how you would leave the class whenever the room got loud and how you kept to yourself. They called you a freak, an outcast. They took one look at your speckled face and called you a freak, commenting on how it looked like acne or dirt. It happened, every single year since you started middle school. You would think that you could finally relax, reset, and make some friends, but they crushed any chance of that.

There was a pair of classmates that would always end up in your class. They would be the first to comment on your behavior or looks, sometimes both. But that wasn’t the worst of it all. Last year, they found out about Takanobu, which shouldn’t seem so bad, until they started spreading rumors about the two of you. Maybe it was how they saw you act with him, or how they saw the difference in size since he hit his growth spurt that year. Or maybe it was just because they hated you.

It was probably the scene they saw you two in, you talking about your day, hands smoothly signing along with your words, a big smile covering your face as you walked to the old park with your baby brother on Takanobu’s shoulders. His face was stoic as always, but you could just barely see the way his lips curled upwards in the slightest bit, if you didn’t know him as well as you knew yourself, you would’ve missed it. That was when the pair decided to follow you, seeing if they could get any dirt on you. They watched from afar as the tall boy carefully put your brother in the baby swing, gently pushing him so that he was rocking back and forth in the seat. They noticed the light pink blush that dusted your cheeks and how you were so much more, alive, with him than in school. After watching you two play with your brother more they concluded that you had to be in a relationship. But there was no way that Takanobu was in middle school, he’s too big, being 5’11 in middle school isn’t very normal.

When you reached school after the weekend ended, you could feel the stares that people were giving, you could hear them whispering to each other, but you couldn’t tell what they were whispering about, but you knew it was about you. You got notes in your school locker, calling you a tramp, a skank, and you couldn’t figure out why. It got to the point where you started believing what they said, you hated the way your freckles covered your face and body, you hated how you couldn’t stand loud places, you hated how you never made eye contact with anyone. You came to hate, you.

!!!Trigger warning: Self-harm and depression!!!

That’s when the cutting started, it was the only way you could cope with the weight that feels heavy on your shoulders, with each slice of the blade you turned that emotional pain into physical pain. You could bear that pain because it would fade away, it wouldn’t come back and keep you awake every night, thinking about how you could’ve done better, how you could’ve been more than you are now. It didn’t stop at your wrists and forearms, when you saw it useless to mark them up anymore, you moved to your legs, painting the bathtub red as the blade danced across your once clean skin. It was the reason you always had long sleeves on, leggings under your skirt.

This continued on until you were called into the principal's office almost halfway through your final year.

Are my grades falling? I swear I still had all A’s. What if they found out about the cutting. They’d tell mom and dad. Then mom would tell nii-san, nii-san would tell Nobu… You panicked at the thought of your best friend finding out about what you did to yourself as you walked to the principal’s office. You could feel your hands get clammy as you clenched them into fists at your side, you could feel the beads of sweat starting to form as you kept your gaze low. But you snapped out of your thoughts as you reached the office door, knocking on the door. After hearing a muffled, “come in,” you slid open the door, stepping inside.

“Y-you called me down sir?” you raised your gaze to look at the principal's desk, avoiding eye contact, “May I-I know why s-sir?”

You could feel his gaze on you as he cleared his throat, “Please have a seat Ms. L/N, I have a few questions to ask you if that’s ok.” he motioned to the chairs in front of his desk. You nodded, taking a seat, waiting for him to continue. “I have just been informed about a rumor about you that was spread early last year, are you aware of said rumor Ms. L/N?” 

Of course, you were aware, everybody has been talking about you behind their backs since last year, “Yes, I was aware there was a rumor spread about me, I don’t know what the rumor is though. I wasn’t able to figure it out, I assume that you know what the rumor was?” you fiddled with the hem of your skirt, anxious to finally find out what the school has been saying behind your back.

“There was a rumor that you were in a relationship with a high school second year. When I asked several students who started the rumor and I spoke with who had started it, they said that they saw you with said high schooler and an infant at Shiketsu park, saying that said infant was yours.” He paused to push his glasses up, “Is any of this true, Ms. L/N?”

Boyfriend? In high school? A child? The only infant I know is…- “N-none of that is true, I swear. The ‘high schooler’ they described is my best friend from elementary school, Aone Takanobu. He hit a growth spurt last year and got really tall, not to mention how broad his shoulders got. He goes to a public middle school, Gakuen Middle. You can contact the school to verify. The infant they saw was my baby brother, having an older and a younger brother should be on my student record.” you did your best to explain the situation to the principal, “I’m sure that they just got confused when they saw how, well, uh- big, Nobu is.” 

“I will check with Gakuen Middle and look at your student record to confirm your statements, but I do trust what you’ve said.” he quickly typed something into his computer, “Now, with that cleared up, I have a few more questions for you.” The man pulled a few papers out of a desk drawer, “Your current and past homeroom teachers have noticed that you started to only wear long sleeves and leggings, even during the summer, a few months after the rumor was said to be started. Can you verify that for me?”

You froze at the mention of long sleeves, He’s gonna ask to see my arms. No no no no no! “Y-yes sir, that is correct. They help me with my body dysmorphia, sir, it was getting bad last year, I guess I never went back to not having them on..” You let the lie slip off your tongue before you could think.

“Then would you mind if I asked you to pull up your sleeves, Ms. L/N? Here at Dobotsu Academy, not only care about academics, but we care about your mental state as well. So I will ask you again, will you please roll up your sleeves. " He saw through your lie easily, so much for that excuse. 

You sat, frozen in your seat. If he saw the scars on your wrist, some new, some old, he would tell your parents. If he told your parents they would take you out of public school for good, which means you wouldn’t get to go to high school with Takanobu. You would break your promise. You couldn’t break that promise, “Sir, I find this unnecessary. May I please return to class.” you said weakly.

With a sigh the man nodded, “Very well, if I hear that you are harming yourself in any way, I will have no choice but to tell your parents.” he paused, pushing his glasses up, “You may return to your class.”

You jumped out of your seat, bowing and muttering a thank you, before leaving the room. There was no way in hell that you were going to let your parents find out. Quickly walking through the halls of the school, you tried to get to your classroom before people noticed you walking through the halls.

~ ~ ~ ~

❤︎ Taglist❤︎:   @bnha-butterfly,  @kuroolongtea, @tinynarutobookmark

A/N - Thank you guys for waiting!! This chapter was going to be longer, but I didn’t want to keep you all waiting!! I really hope you liked this chapter!! Please remember, my DMs are always open if you need to talk to someone!! Please send me a message if you are feeling depressed or suicidal. I may not be able to help much, but I’m always here to support you!!! ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎

#Aone #Aone Takanobu #aone takanobu x reader #aone x reader #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu #x reader

[cuddlepilefics]

Hiii I have a request could you write a sickfic where felix drink a milkshake but he's lactose intolerant and Chan takes care of him? Thank you

A trip to the mall  

Fandom: Stray Kids

Sickie: Felix

Caregiver: Chan

 Felix POV.:

There was one thing I really loved doing with my friends and that was going to the mall. Back in Australia my friends and I often hung out at the mall after school, mostly just window shopping because we didn’t have that much money. Now that I had a job and some money to spare, I couldn’t wait to go there with my members. Sure, Korean malls were a bit different from Australian ones but I was sure it’d be just as much fun. Sadly, not everyone was as excited as me because there’d also be the risk of being recognized by fans. Though I truly loved Stay, I was hoping to have a relaxed and fun day with my friends, living a normal life like other people my age. To avoid running into people, we all put on masks and hats, hiding as much of our faces as possible. Over breakfast we had decided to split up for most of the time at the mall because smaller groups would draw less attention.

Arriving at the mall, we parted ways. I went with Changbin, while our leader took the two maknaes and Minho teamed up with Hyunjin and Jisung. It wasn’t exactly what I had been looking for when we said we’d go shopping. A group of two was rather boring but who was I to complain, at least we were going out and I was partnered with Changbin. We visited different stores, not buying much but putting together ridiculous outfits for each other and taking a few pictures. I ended up with a pair of sneakers and new shirt, Changbin picked up a new pair of headphones and a leather jacket. It had already been hours since we arrived and I was starting to feel hungry. When I heard my hyung’s stomach imitating whale sounds, I knew he felt the same. Giggling, I poked his arm: “Hyung, should we maybe meet up with the others to have lunch?” – “That’d be awesome, I’m starving over here”, he laughed awkwardly patting his tummy. I pulled out my phone and texted the groupchat, asking for everyone to meet at the food court in about twenty minutes. That’d give them enough time to pay for what they wanted to buy but would keep us from starving as we waited.

Not too long after, I saw Hyunjin running towards us, almost tackling me to the ground. His boy was really doing an awesome job at not drawing attention. From the corners of my eyes I could see Changbin roll his eyes. Minho and Jisung followed in a light jog, panting as they came to a halt next to us. “Hyunjin, how many coffees did you have this morning? I’m too old for this”, Minho gasped. “Aish, you’re finally admitting it hyung”, Jisung teased, receiving a look that clearly stated ‘just wait till we get home’, causing the younger to hide behind Changbin. They were still bickering when the other trio joined us. Judging by the shopping bags, everyone had found at least a few pieces, so our trip already turned out a success. “Guys, as entertaining it is to watch you fight, I’m hungry. Do you really want me to starve on your watch”, I whined, pouting at Chan. Just as I hoped, the leader spoke up: “Alright everyone, decide what you want to eat, so we know whether we need to split up again or not.”

In the end we didn’t split up. Since everyone was looking for something sweet, we agreed on going to a milkshake bar together. I was glad we all stayed together as one big group this time, so I’d really get to spend some time with all of my friends, not only a handful. Chan chose a strawberry milkshake, while I ordered a cookies-and-cream one. It had only been a few minutes since we were all served our shakes, but I had already tried each of them, arguing with Hyunjin because mine was obviously so much better than his. However, there was something I didn’t realize. When I went to drink milkshakes with my friends in Sydney, we always went to a vegan store, so there was no questioning whether the shakes were prepared with plant-based milk. That was really important to me because, what my members didn’t know, was that I was lactose intolerant. Being so used to having vegan milkshakes, I completely forgot to ask for my shake to be made with plant-based milk. I had only about a quarter of my shake left when I felt my stomach rumble. Instinctively, I rested my hand on my stomach, already feeling my abdomen bloating slightly. That reminded me that most milkshakes were, as the name already said, made with milk, something I shouldn’t have. Yeah, I had had to learn that the hard way when I was younger. Realizing my mistake, I pushed the cup towards Chan and claimed I was full already.

 Chan’s POV.:

We finished our shakes and I had to admit how good of an idea it had been to come here. This trip really did make me forget about work and I was able to just have some fun with my dongsaengs. However, for the rest of the day we wanted to stick together as one big group, even if that would draw more attention towards us. It was simply more fun if everyone was together. We walked around taking selfies and just enjoying ourselves. I really wanted a pic with Felix too, that’s when I noticed my fellow Aussie trailing behind. Slowing my pace, I waited for him to catch up to me. “Oi Felix, you’re looking a bit pale there, everything ok?”, I frowned, noticing the small pout forming on his lips. “Hyung, I- I kinda messed up”, he mumbled, hugging his middle with a groan when his stomach cramped, “I’m lactose intolerant.” I froze in my spot, stunned at the new information I only learned about now: “You’re what?” – “Lactose intolerant. That’s why I always only eat one slice of pizza because that’s as much as I can get away, having only a small stomach ache. More than one slice would not end well”, my dongsaeng explained between gritted teeth.

By now the entire group had stopped walking, watching the two of us. “What made you think, having a milkshake was a good idea then? Are you insane?” – “The milkshake bar I always went to in Sydney was vegan, so I forgot about it”, he whimpered doubling over. MY irritation at his careless behavior ease and I gave him a small comforting smile. “It’s ok, Lix. Want me to take you home? The others can continue shopping a bit but I think you’re done for today.” He nodded and I looked up to talk to the other members. “It’s alright hyung, just take care of him”, Minho stated, the rest nodding along, all of them having listened in on the conversation between Felix and me. We bid our goodbyes and I called for a driver while slowly guiding Felix towards the exit. We weren’t really fast, since the younger struggled to walk with the pain in his abdomen but we still had to wait for someone to come pick us up. I made Felix sit on a bench, while we waited. The poor boy was getting paler by the minute. “Lix, what usually happens when you eat dairy?”, I hummed, wanting to know what we were going to deal with. Letting go of his shopping bags, Felix pulled his knees to his chest resting his chin on them: “Always depends how much I eat. My stomach hurts and I get bloated. If I have a lot, it usually only gets better after I throw most of it up but that hasn’t happened in years. Last time that happened, I was still really young and refused to listen to my mom. I secretly ate ice cream back then.” Despite the pain, I could see a small smile on his face at the memory. I shook my head, that really sounded like him, valuing ice cream over anything else.

“How do you feel now?”, I asked after we got settled in the back of the car. He rested his head against the window, replying in a low voice: “Queasy.” Rubbing his shoulder in sympathy, I leaned back in my seat and we spent most of the ride in silence. I thought Felix might have fallen asleep to the soothing motion of the car, when he shot upright in his seat. Starling, I looked over at him and caught a glance at his greyish lips before he clamped his hands over them. My dongsaeng’s face had drained of all color and I cursed, knowing what was going to come next. In a rush I shoved his new shirt and the shoebox into my shopping bag, holding the now empty plastic bag under his chin. Felix removed his hand from his mouth, holding the bag closer to his face with both hands. Since he was holding the bag himself, I settled for rubbing his back as a retch tore from his throat. I could feel the younger’s spine rippled as he bent over further. He coughed, which was soon followed by a splashing noise, making me cringe in sympathy. I rolled down the windows and tucked the younger’s hair behind his ears. If he kept growing it, he’d soon look like Hyunjin. Another harsh gag tore me from my thoughts and whispered words of encouragement as I continued to rub Felix’ back. Being close friends with him, I knew just how much the younger despised throwing up.

Drawing in a shaky breath, Felix lifted his head from the shopping bag and took the bag in one hand. He used the other hand to wipe at the tears, dotting his eyelashes. With his sleeve, he dried the sweat on coating his forehead and rested his head against the car seat. I searched through my backpack in hopes of having some water and maybe tissues with me asking: “Better?” When I looked back at my friend, saw him shake his head, just as ashy pale as before. His stomach rumbled and he squeezed his eyes shut before losing the battle against his stomach and diving back into the bag. “Aish, that sucks, mate”, I commented patting the younger’s back as he choked up two more waves of his milkshake. Before sitting back up and clearing his throat: “Think I’m done now.” I handed him some water and he first rinsed his mouth, taking a few careful sips afterwards. The color was slowly returning to his face and I carded my fingers through his sweaty bangs as he rested his head on my shoulder, exhausted from the ordeal. We made it through the rest of the ride okay. Felix didn’t get sick anymore but held onto the half-filled shopping bag just in case.

When the car pulled up to the dorm building, I thanked and apologized to the driver before helping Felix get out. The boy was still a bit unsteady on his feet and the arm he wrapped protectively around his middle told me he was still in pain. We walked past a trashcan on the sidewalk and Felix tied the sickbag closed, disposing of it. He had been quiet the entire time and I had just assumed he was exhausted but when he crossed the building’s entrance hall, he suddenly dashed from my side. Making it to a bin at one of the walls just in time, my dongsaeng braced his hand against the wall heaving. There wasn’t much more for him to bring up though and after retching up a small trickle, he was reduced to dry heaves. I supported his side to prevent him from toppling over. “Lixxie, you’re empty. There’s nothing left, the entire shake is out now”, I soothed but he just shook his head retching again. Sighing, I rubbed his back till he had calmed down and caught his breath. “Do you think it’s safe to move yet? It’s not that much further to our dorm” – “Mhm, I think most of it is out now anyways”, Felix rasped lowly, holding onto my arm for support as we made our way to the elevator.

I quickly typed in the code, letting us into the apartment. We kicked off our shoes and I left my backpack and shopping bag with our new clothes in the hallway. “Hyung, I’ll just sit in the bathroom for a bit longer. Still feel meh”, the young Aussie admitted and I patted his shoulder promising: “I’ll keep you company in a second, yeah? I’ll just make some tea to settle your stomach.” As promised, I soon joined my dongsaeng, offering him tea and a clean shirt, taking a seat on the bathtub. Luckily, he didn’t throw up again. We sat in silence, with Felix slowly sipping his tea before he spoke up: “Sorry, I’m usually better at avoiding situations like this. I’m not as irresponsible as you think.” – “It’s ok, Lix. I know you didn’t mean for any of this to happen. I would have just hoped you’d tell us about these kinds of things”, I sighed, “Did you at least have fun before that?” He beamed up at me, showing that kind of smile that could make anyone’s day a thousand times better: “It was amazing actually. We really need to do these things more often when the schedule allows it. I really missed being just a boy hanging out with my friends.” – “We will, we just need to watch out what we choose for lunch in the future”, I smiled, glad that everything was fine in the end.

#sick #sickfic #fanfic #stray kids #skz #emeto #lee felix #bang chan #whump #comfort #fluff

[invisibleanonymousmonsters]

Civilian

Character: Jason Todd x Fem!Reader

Summary: Jason Todd is used to saving the innocent. But he’s not used to them saving him. 

Word Count: 3,100 – One Shot

“Fuck me,” Jason groaned as he stumbled across the rooftops.

How he was able to even walk right now was beyond him.

He had Slade on the ropes. Just one more punch to put him off balance and Jason would’ve shoved a knife into his jugular and be done with him. But Slade had a few more tricks up his sleeve and decided to flee instead of finish a losing battle, so he ran like a coward. 

It left Jason utterly irritated and with a huge gash in his side, amongst other various injuries. 

He could’ve called one his “friends” or someone in his “family.” But he was stubborn. He wanted to be stronger than that. He wanted to prove that he didn’t need any of them. He was better than that. He was the best. And he’d risk bleeding out to prove it to them – or really…himself.

But his body wasn’t on the same page.

And it finally had enough.

Jason stumbled to his knees on a rooftop. He groaned as his vision became hazy.

His helmet had a protective system in place so no one could take it off if he was unconscious. They’d get a nice little shock if they tried. His identity would be safe even if someone stumbled upon his injured body… or corpse.

Jason managed to roll onto his back and was met with the smoggy Gotham sky.

“Get the fuck up,” he told himself aloud.

He blinked, trying to straighten and clear his vision.

But it was useless.

The last thing Jason remember seeing was the Bat signal reflecting off of the cloudy sky. Somewhere in the city, there was more crime to fight and he’d just be another asshole who thought he could put a stop to it.

Dying didn’t scare Jason anymore. He’d done it once before, and he could do it again. What did it matter now anyway?

But Jason didn’t die.

He woke up on a couch. Well, if one could even call it that. His 6’4 frame could barely fit on the thing. His legs were hanging off the end, not able to comfortably fit on the thing.

His head felt like it was having the worse hangover of his life. When he opened his eyes, he blinked at the incoming sunlight. Then he realized he wasn’t looking through the programming of his Red Hood helmet.

Then he touched his face to realize that his backup domino mask had also been removed, leaving his identity exposed. 

His eyes widened in slight panic as he looked around.

He appeared to be a in a small apartment – normal, no threats detected.

Then Jason looked down to realize he wasn’t in his uniform. In fact, his chest was bare and he was only in his black briefs. His autopsy scars on full display.

But just half a foot away from him, his clothes were neatly folded into a pile on the edge of the coffee table. His two guns were sitting right next to them.

Whoever had brought him here clearly didn’t see him as a threat. Stupid on their part. There were about two dozen other weapons hiding in the crevices of his clothes too.

But the more concerning thing was that Jason didn’t have a single wound on his body. The giant gash to his side that had made him faint and nearly die from blood loss was nowhere to be found. After all these years, Jason was still figuring out the side effects from being dumped into the Lazarus pit. But this couldn’t be related, could it?

Suddenly there was the sound of the apartment door opening.

On instinct alone, Jason shot up, grabbed one of his guns, and found his target.

What he wasn’t expecting to find was a beautiful woman, probably only just a little bit younger than him, standing with a coffees in a carrier tray and a bag in the other hand. She had earbuds in, further disorienting her from such a welcome. Her eyes went wide and the rest of her body was completely frozen.

After a few seconds, she slowly tugged her headphones out.

“Is the gun really necessary?” She asked.

But Jason could tell from her body language that she was scared.

“Who the hell are you?”

She had enough courage to glare at his tone. “I’m the person who saved your life, asshole.”

“Yeah? And how exactly did you do that?”

She seemed to be getting less scared and more angry with every sentence Jason said.

“If you put the fucking gun down, I’ll tell you.”

Jason hesitated before finally putting it down. Then his behavior caught up to him. Here was this stranger, who was clearly innocent and had helped him…and his first thought was to point a gun at the poor thing.

“Sorry,” he finally gasped. “It’s…a habit.”

She just eyed him, neither rejecting or accepting his apology.

She sat on the love seat opposite of the couch that he’d taken over.

With an innocent look, she slowly put a coffee cup on the table and the bag.

“I’m not much of a cook… so I picked up breakfast. It’s just a black coffee. I figured you didn’t like anything fancy.” 

“T-Thank you,” he stuttered out, trying his best not to sound harsh.

Those words were strange coming out of his mouth. And Jason couldn’t figure out if it was because he’d completely lost his manners or there wasn’t anything someone had done for him lately that warranted any sort of thanks.

“I’m sorry about taking off your clothes,” she suddenly said. “I would’ve given you something. But…well…I don’t have anything even close to your size. Even my oversized clothing wouldn’t have fit.”

Jason was about to tell her it was OK, but she continued.

“Not that I would’ve even been able to put it on you. I hardly got your clothes off.”

Jason smirked at that. “Speaking of which, how the hell did you get my helmet off.”

“Yeah…I managed to get you to come to for a minute or so.” Then she shifted in her seat, clutching her coffee tighter as if it was a security blanket. “I honestly just asked you very nicely. I promised I wouldn’t tell anyone what you looked like. You were kind of just…a zombie or something and…took it off.”

Then he took her stature in. Jason knew he was a big guy. He was bigger than the majority of men. He’d only met a few women in his life that were taller than him, and they were all either Amazons or aliens.

This young woman was neither of those things.

“How did you get me off that roof?”

She laughed, seeing that he was trying to add it up in his head. “I’m definitely no Superman. My neighbor doesn’t have any other hobbies besides going to the gym. He owed me a favor.” Then her eyes widened. “Don’t worry, he didn’t see you without your helmet. He’s also sworn to secrecy.”

Jason shrugged. “It’s fine if he did. I can just kill him later.”

He saw her whole body tense up at that.

“Relax. I’m kidding.”

Her tension was released, but she didn’t find his joke very funny.

Then her eyes locked to the floor.

Jason took this chance to study her. 

Her hair was a bit of a mess. But there was still a halo around it as the sun shined from behind her. Her jeans were a bit baggy, but purposely so. She was wearing a band t-shirt that was so worn that there were a few holes in it.

Jason had to acknowledge that she was beautiful. But he had made note of that as soon as he’d pointed a gun at her.

“I ended last night with a life-threatening injury…amongst other things,” Jason said as he looked down at his body. “I woke up with not even a scratch on me. So why don’t you tell me how the hell that’s possible?”

She finally raised her gaze from the floor to him. Then she swallowed and clenched her jaw. It was clear she had been hoping for a scenario where Jason didn’t ask any questions, where he would just give his thanks and move on.

But she wasn’t that lucky. 

“Hey,” he said gently. “You’ve seen my face. You know who I am now. Whatever it is you’re scared to tell me, we’ll be even.”

She stared at him a bit longer before taking in a shaky breath. “I…umm…can do this thing.”

“Uh huh,” he encouraged.

“I can heal people by…umm…touching them?”

Jason sat back, letting the information settle. “Huh,” he said with small nod.

“I saved your life,” she told him. “All I ask in return is that you keep my secret.”

“You don’t have to worry about that,” he told her.

She nodded nervously, but didn’t seem fully convinced.

“What’s your name?” He asked her softly.

She looked unsure if she should tell him.

“I’m Jason. Jason Todd.” He offered to even the playing field.

She tilted her head, probably because she heard that name before. Everyone in Gotham had at some point. The tragic death of Bruce Wayne’s second adopted son. And then the dead son who had somehow come back, his death misidentified. There were hundreds of rumors about what really happened. But they all sounded ridiculous to her.

“Y/N,” she finally told him.

“Thank you for saving my life, Y/N.” He scratched the back of his neck. “But I have to ask why you did.”

After all, the neighborhood she lived in was weary of Gotham’s vigilantes. Some believed they were keeping them safe, while others thought they were just making things worse. It led to a general distrust of the masked heroes.

“They say the Red Hood used to be Robin,” she told him quietly.

“I don’t pay attention to what people say…”

Y/N leaned forward. “But is it true? Were you Robin back then?”

Jason ground his teeth together. “That was a lifetime ago.”

She watched him for a minute, working out whether she wanted to share something or not. 

“When I was a little girl, I was at the bank with my mom when a robbery went down. Things went bad and quick. They panicked, decided a little girl was the best hostage to grab. We barely got a few blocks away before Batman intervened. I was terrified, even of him. But Robin was with him…and he could tell I was scared. He wasn’t that much older than me, but he was so much braver. He held my hand until the police came. But even then I wouldn’t let go of him. So, he stayed with me until my mom got there.” She took in a deep and shaky breath. “It meant a lot to me.”

Jason controlled his expression, but he knew what she was talking about. He remembered that night. How he did was beyond him. But it didn’t feel long ago. He remembered thinking the little girl was pretty. 

Jason didn’t have a lot of friends back then. He came from the streets but lived in a mansion. He couldn’t figure out who he was back then. And it was hard to relate to other children. 

Back then, it was the most intimate interaction he had with someone his age. 

“Would you still have saved me last night even if I hadn’t been Robin?” 

This was all Y/N would get in terms of Jason admitting that he had been Robin that night.

Y/N shrugged and nodded. Then she cleared her throat. “The only thing saving this shit hole of a city is people doing the right thing.”

Jason stood.

The motion startled Y/N and she followed his action without even meaning to.

Now that he was standing on his own two feet, she truly understood just how absolutely massive he was. She was by no means short and she still felt like she was looking at a giant.

However, Jason misread her gawking for something else. “You don’t have to be scared of me, kid. I’m not going to hurt you,” he told her quietly.

“I’m not scared of you,” she said as her face suddenly felt hot.

Y/N didn’t know what she had expected to see under that red helmet last night. But she definitely wasn’t expecting a man handsome enough to be a model.

But then her brow scrunched, “And I’m not a kid.” Jason smiled – like, genuinely smiled. The muscles on his face forgot what that felt like.

He eyed the band t-shirt she was wearing: Fleetwood Mac – the Rumors album, to be precise.

“You’ve got good taste in music,” Jason complimented.

“Thank you,” Y/N mumbled.

A new tension filled the air.

Something neither of them have felt in awhile – if at all.

Y/N cleared her throat again, starting to feel too close to this large and beautiful man who was only standing in his briefs.

“You can use the shower if you want.”

Jason smirked. “Thanks, but I should get out of your hair. You’ve already done enough for me.”

He took a step toward her, realizing that he seemed to like seeing her reaction to his presence.

She stayed in place, but shifted her weight.

Jason lowered his head a bit. “Your secret is safe with me, Y/N. Thank you again…you saved my life.”

——————

Y/N and Jason couldn’t stop thinking about one another since that morning.

Jason had trust issues. And because of those trust issues, he learned not to rely on others. He refused to be anything besides independent. But those flaws were also the reason it was so hard for him to get close to anyone. He kept people at a distance so he could never be rejected or get his heart broken. It was problematic, but that was how he survived.

But Y/N had shown him kindness and then expected absolutely nothing in return. She just hoped he wouldn’t shoot her brains out when he finally came to.

Meanwhile, Y/N couldn’t remember the last time a man looked at her the way Jason had. Just thinking about the looks he gave her caused goosebumps to shiver across her skin. She’d seen the scars across his skin and knew he’d lived a rough life. And that wasn’t even including the scars his mind and heart held. She wondered who was the last person to help him or to just show him that they cared whether he lived or died.

It had been a few weeks and Y/N still couldn’t get Jason Todd out of her mind. Even now, as she sat on the rooftop of her building once again, eating a pizza she’d just picked up and washing it down with cheap red wine.

She almost spilled said wine all over herself when she jumped from the sound of someone dropping onto the roof from behind her.

Y/N whipped around to see Red Hood walking steadily toward her.

“Sorry. I tried to be loud so I wouldn’t scare you.” His voice sounded different from the helmet distorting it.

“Well, most people use doors and stairs…so I think the effort is pretty useless.”

Jason ignored her joke and pulled out a thick envelope that had been tucked on the inside of his leather jacket. 

He handed it to her.

Y/N was confused, but took it from his grasp anyway.

She opened it to find two tickets to see Fleetwood Mac on their reunion tour at Gotham City Stadium.

Her gaze shot up to Jason’s and then she did a double take at the tickets, making sure she wasn’t seeing things.

“How - What - Why?” She finally sputtered out the right question.

Jason just shrugged. “I owed you.”

“T-This is too much. I can’t accept this. These tickets must’ve cost a fortune,” she told him as she tried to hand the envelop back to him.

But he wasn’t having it and simply shook his head.

Y/N knew they cost a fortune because she had looked up tickets. Her heart had broken when she saw how far out of her budget the lowest prices were.

“Take them, Y/N. Please.”

She knew there was no point in arguing.

But she slowly looked up at him. “Would…ummm… Would you like to go with me?”

Jason blinked at the offer. “Seriously?”

Y/N laughed at his surprise. “Yeah, I mean, clearly you’re a fan, too.” Then she shrugged, now self conscious that she’d been too forward. “I don’t know. When was the last time you did something fun?”

Jason was shocked at how right she was.

“Oh, my God!” Y/N suddenly yelped.

Jason immediately jumped into action, grabbing both of his guns and stepping to Y/N in a protective stance.

“Jason, you’re bleeding!” She cried out, not realizing that he had just used his body as a human shield for her to defend an attack that wasn’t even happening.

He relaxed and followed her gaze to his forearm – the small patch of skin between his gloves and the rolled up sleeve of his leather jacket. He had been sliced by a knife. He probably needed to clean it before it got infected and stitch it up. 

“Y/N, it’s just a scratch.”

“Shut up,” she snapped. “Come here.”

Then he let her dragged him to the two fold-out chairs she kept on the roof.

Jason realized suddenly that he didn’t mind being bossed around by this woman. In fact, he kind of enjoyed it.

Without asking for permission, Y/N put her palm over his cut.

Jason watched as he felt a comforting warmth wash over the area of skin that she was touching. Within seconds, his cut was completely gone.

Y/N gave it a satisfied smile. No matter how many injuries she healed, the pride and relief never went away.

“You’re fucking amazing, you know that?” Jason was relieved his helmet hid the dumbstruck look that was surely on his face. 

Y/N didn’t seem to take the compliment very well and slightly folded into herself.

“So, will you?” She changed the subject quickly.

“Will I what?” But as Jason asked for clarification, he knew that he’d probably do anything Y/N would ask of him.

“Will you go to the concert with me?”

He nodded.

The nonverbal answer was enough for Y/N because she gave him a beaming smile.

In that moment, Jason wondered how he could ever push Y/N away like he had done with everyone else in his life. 

And for once, he allowed himself to feel happy.

Maybe he could keep letting himself be happy, as long as it included Y/N. 

---------------------------

Really, really loving writing for Jason Todd. I was a little exhausted with Marvel fandom.  Let me know what you think!

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