#Love that my best posts were almost all The Logical Exception

[typically-untypical]

I posted 492 times in 2022

140 posts created (28%)

352 posts reblogged (72%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@thecrowslullaby

@naminethewitch

@selfdestructivecat

@arya-skywalker

@candied-peach

I tagged 291 of my posts in 2022

Only 41% of my posts had no tags

#untypical creations - 104 posts

#sanders sides - 87 posts

#sanders side fic - 85 posts

#fanfic - 84 posts

#reblog - 78 posts

#remus sanders - 66 posts

#logan sanders - 62 posts

#virgil sanders - 53 posts

#janus sanders - 51 posts

#patton sanders - 51 posts

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

The Logical Exception Photo Gallery

Art by @dillydallydove

Logan closed his eyes and though he was still angry at the situation, angry at himself, he wasn’t angry at Roman. He knew he had hurt his brother, and he would never be able to fix that. There was a resignation in his soul. He had already given his life up for his brothers once, what was a second time?

The Logical Exception: Chapter 32 on Ao3

The Logical Exception: Chapter 32 on YouTube

53 notes - Posted June 2, 2022

#4

The Logical Exception!

Hello Everyone! I semi-recently reached 1,000 subscribers on YouTube 🎉 As a thank you to everyone who supported me I recorded one of my longer stories! It was a lot of work but I'm excited with the way it turned out. Not only did I record this story but I also commissioned some amazing artists to help with a few scene pictures! I will be releasing those sporadically tomorrow with the quotes that inspired them but if you want to check them out now please check out my video!

Thank you again to @yourmypenguin @treeni @birdsongisland @dndndrawings @cephy-the-squid @lickoutyourbrains @asofterfan @dillydallydove @thepastelpeach @dragonjadearts @leconcombrerit

Please pay the artists some love as they are fantastic!

72 notes - Posted June 1, 2022

#3

Looking for artists for quick turn-around commissions! I need the piece before the end of May 30th!

I'm working on a voice recording project and looking for a specific number of pictures from different artists, each one of course paid for, but I still have a few spots to fill. Please contact me if you are interested and if not, please repost so I can reach artists who might be!

I'm so excited for how this is going to turn out and thank you all for your help!

73 notes - Posted May 21, 2022

#2

New Year Old Trope - Fourth Wall Break

Logan's Letter

To Whom It May Concern,

I am not sure how you are able to see this, or even if this is coming through properly. Afterall, this is uncharted territory in terms of scientific thought. It shouldn’t be possible for a fictional character to address someone from the material world, yet here we are. If I am to be given this chance, I want to make the most of it and clear up some misconceptions that I believe may exist. Some of you may not need this message, and if that’s the case, I am thankful. However, some of you have gone far too long without hearing these indisputable facts.

You are enough. No matter where you are in your life right now, you are enough. You may grow and change in the future, and that growth will be needed, but who you are right now is still enough.

Self-Care looks different for different people. What fulfills you won’t always fulfill others and vice versa, you must find the things that bring you joy and peace. Self-Care is essential, do not deny yourself something you need.

You deserve to be listened to. Your thoughts, ideas, likes, and interests are valid, and you deserve a space to be heard.

Progress is inevitable. Your days, months, or even years of dedication, work, and practice are not for naught. You have progressed, and you will continue to do so.

I am proud of you. Each task you accomplish is an accomplishment, celebrate them, no matter how small.

All that is to say, you are a wonderful human. I appreciate having you as a fan. Keep going.

Sincerely Yours,

Logan

Tag List: @tsshipmonth2020 @simplestoryteller @fantasticfangirl21 @joylessnightsky

99 notes - Posted January 11, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

The Logical Exception Photo Gallery!

Art by @yourmypenguin

Now Anxiety would attack. Logan had their moves memorized just like the periodic table of elements. He slid quickly to the wall, pushing himself flat against it as the shadows shot towards Morality instead. Anxiety was also slower than normal. Was this a side effect of the Creativity twins' disappearance? Again, another question for later. Logan reached up, moving the lock on the fire escape with his powers, it barely hung on. That was move two.

The Logical Exception: Chapter 1 on Ao3

The Logical Exception: Chapter 1 on YouTube

163 notes - Posted June 2, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review #Love that my best posts were almost all The Logical Exception #Youtube

[idyllic-affections]

So I JUST got this idea after reading your mist recent adoptive dad!Kaveh piece and now it WILL NOT leave my mind. You emphasized on how his child's emotions are his emotions and how he's much more empathetic when it comes to them. So naturally, as a connoisseur of all things angst, I keep thinking how Kaveh will handle it when his child has their first heartbreak! Being so emotional himself will he be able to hold up or will he cry with them? and I wonder what the rest of them will do, there's just so many possibilities

how is [name]'s first heartbreak handled?

summary. how does [name]'s platonic co-parenting family respond to their first breakup?

trigger & content warnings. gaslighting, tough breakups, abusive behavior, lots of tears, & medical malpractice (briefly and pretty non-seriously).

tropes, pairings, fic length, & other notes. hurt/comfort. tighnari & reader, alhtiaham & reader, adoptive dad!kaveh & reader, cyno & reader, collei & reader. 1k words. they/them pronouns for reader. this post is an expansion of what if kaveh adopted a child?

author's thoughts. THIS IS SO TASTY THANK YOU FOR SENDING THIS.... ive never been in this situation before nor do i really understand what heartbreak feels like so i just kind of went with the flow. focused mostly on what [name]'s lil family would do and how they'd all react. anyway keep sending me your adoptive dad!kaveh thoughts guys i love this kind of interaction haha <3

tighnari is furious. alhaitham is level-headed and logical as usual, but not indifferent. kaveh cries with them. cyno is livid. collei is calm, comforting.

kaveh is very sensitive to his kid's mood; i have indeed emphasized this already. he knows when something is wrong. he senses the shift in their mood almost instantly. depending on where they are, he may or may not be the first to know.

do they return to gandharva ville after they break up with their first love (for the sake of angst, let's say it's because the ex-lover in question sought to abuse and take advantage of their selflessness, but [name] was not having it, and they were gaslit upon pointing it out and ended up being called needy)? if so, tighnari will know first.

archons forbid their ex ever show up at gandharva ville for any kind of treatment. tighnari will treat them, yes, but he will make it hell. he will make it worse before making it better. medical malpractice? no, that's not what it is, silly. he's not even a licensed doctor! how can he commit malpractice if he doesn't practice medicine in the first place?

...

tighnari can think all he wants about doing such a thing, but he really wouldn't. he couldn't do something like that. he'd have a guilty conscience forever if he did. however, that does not mean he won't give [name]'s ex attitude. oh archons, he has all the attitude in the world to spare for the asshole who hurt his nibling (a/n: that's the gn term for niece or nephew).

[name] is not needy. sensitive and clingy at times, perhaps, but needy? tighnari scoffs at the idea. they're self-sufficient, if anything. the simple truth is that [name] likes affection because they were spoiled with it when they were little. the fact that their first love gaslit them in such a disgusting way makes the forest watcher's blood boil.

"[name]..." he'd sigh, heart squeezing painfully in his chest as he held them against his chest, unable to do much of anything except listen to the way they sobbed. tighnari's tail instinctively curled around their waist. "it really is not your fault. some people are just... horrible like that. ultimately, you deserve better, so this is for the best. it may not feel that way right now, but one day, it will."

do they return to kaveh and alhaitham's shared home instead? is kaveh home? if not, then alhaitham will know first. it isn't improbable. kaveh is often away on work trips, so it isn't hard to imagine that the akademiya's scribe would know first.

alhaitham hates seeing kaveh cry. he wishes he would stop expending himself to a harmful extent for the sake of others.

he also hates seeing [name] cry. why should they spend time crying over a manipulative asshole who had no capacity to understand them as a person? they shouldn't, and yet... they are.

like tighnari, alhaitham sighs. he's stroking their hair away from their face with one hand, stopping every now and then to gently pat their tears dry, even though his efforts are fruitless; they end up crying more regardless of how many times he dries their face. their head is laid in his lap. it's the least the scribe can do until kaveh gets home.

"[name], they're not worth your time. you were raised to be kind and emotionally articulate. it isn't your fault that they tried to take advantage of that."

he sighs again.

"i'm proud that you refused to let them manipulate you."

alhaitham's blatant, clearly-worded praise is rare. it soothes their soul a little.

if kaveh is home, however...

they will be sobbing in his arms within the hour. he always knows when something is wrong, and when something is wrong? he's there to support and console them. that is what any good father would do. kaveh's heart shatters on their behalf when they manage to choke out between tears that their love had so callously tried to abuse the kindness they offered to all those around them.

kaveh undoubtedly cries with them, holding their figure tightly against his.

"honey, it—" he chokes, aggressively wiping his face with one hand while the other remains secured around their waist. "it's not you, okay? it's not your fault. people, they— they like to try and take advantage of things they don't have. kind people don't take advantage of kindness. good people don't take advantage of goodness. you did well. you handled it well."

cyno will always be the last to know, regardless of what order everyone else finds out in.

cyno is also the most furious.

it's probably in [name]'s ex's best interest to flee the country. the wrath of general mahamatra cyno is an utterly horrifying thing to be the target of. he won't physically hurt them, no (although he would have to put all of his self control into practice in order to not knock all of the kid's teeth out...), but he will make it very clear that he does not want them anywhere near his nibling ever again unless it's to apologize, and even then... he had better not see them lingering too long.

the next time he sees kaveh and his kid, cyno plants a firm hand on [name]'s shoulder, giving it a reassuring squeeze, saying, "they won't bother you again."

a slight chill runs up their spine at that. "...what did you do to them..?"

"don't worry about it."

anyway congrats to [name]'s manipulative ex! they have made enemies with four of the most influential people in sumeru <3

(and as a little bonus treat:

collei, now in her late teens, is some kind of mix between tighnari, alhaitham, and kaveh. she's not mad. she's just disappointed, really; she loves [name] like a little sibling and just doesn't understand why anyone would knowingly hurt them. she knows very well that such cruel people do exist—she was the victim of one such person, after all—but... it's so hard for her to fathom. collei is very gentle and understanding in this situation, letting them cry on her shoulder for as long as they need to. once their tears have dried, she takes them out on patrol with her.

she makes them fresh pita pockets over a fire and spends the afternoon laughing and joking around with them to help them feel better. she'll even tell one of cyno's awful jokes if it will make them smile. <3)

adoptive dad!kaveh taglist: @kaoyamamegami. send a non-anonymous ask to be added. please consider reblogging, it helps me out quite a lot!

#aphelion brainrots 🌸 #: [ adoptive dad kaveh! 🌸 ] #favoniuslibrary #astronetwrk #platonic genshin #platonic genshin impact #platonic genshin impact x reader #platonic genshin x reader #kaveh x reader #platonic kaveh x reader #tighnari x reader #cyno x reader #alhaitham x reader #collei x reader

[xhoess]

Fashion and design

Masterlist

Hongjoong!model x fem Bod! Fotographer

Summary: Hongjoong is a model and has his own clothing line, you are his fotographer for the day. When you saw that you got a chance to shoot hongjong you didn't believe it. You have been a fan of his clothing line for a while and are absolutely obsessed with it, but what you don't know is that he has been following your work since that day you started to post your photos.

Genre: romance(?), mature content

Warnings: without protection(wrap it up!!!), hongjoong down bad for you

You where sitting on your bed with your laptop, checking if you have anymore jobs for the next weeks. You see that next week on Wednesday you have a shoot scheduled with the Kim hongjoong. Designer and model. Your jaw drops in shock, why did he chose you to be his photographer, he has never even met you?

You quickly pick up your phone and dial your friends number.

"Jongho you will not believe who I will be shooting next week" "you sound exited, so probably someone famous?" He guesses. "Well yes ofcourse someone famous but I'll give you a hint, he is one of my top 3 designers in the fashion industry right now" you hear jongho think on the other side of the line, "hmm, is it Kim hongjoong?" He asks "YES it's fucking the Kim hongjoong, how did he find me I'm not even that famous I only had a couple professional collaborations" "I don't know y/n but I do know you definitely need to accept this, this is such a huge opportunity" He said "you're right, but I would never in a million years decline this anyway" you laugh.

You and jongho talk for a couple more minutes before you hang up to get ready for bed. But before you get up to wash your face you quickly accept the job offer. You can't wait till next Wednesday.

You were ready to lay in bed but your phone pings, you got an Instagram DM of a online friend you made recently, he was the absolute sweetest and helped you with a few dilemmas. You've told him almost everything that happened in your life the last few months and he's a good listener.

The week goes by very slow but it's finally Wednesday. You grab your stuff and drive to your photo studio. You've never felt so nervous to do a shoot, but it's logical, it's the biggest one yet.

Once the door is unlocked you turn the lights on with the light switch, you always forget how bright that light it's. Especially when it's still dark outside, which is right now because you need to come at least 2 hours early to set everything up.

About 1 pm there was a loud knock on the door, you rushed to the front of the studio to open it. "Hi, come on in, I am y/n l/n I will be your photographer today!" You say kindly, trying not to freak out in the meantime. "Hi y/n, my name is Hongjoong. I am glad you excepted my request, I love your work" He says while bowing slightly to greet you.

"You're kidding, I absolutely love the clothing line you have going on right now. Is it true you design every piece by yourself?" You ask. Hongjoong nods "yes, and I absolutely love doing it. Maybe I do it a bit to much, it causes a lot of stress but at the end it's all worth it" "I'm sure it is" you say.

A few minutes later you showed Hongjoong the dressing room where he could change clothes in private. While he was putting on the first outfit you put on some music, if it's silent you can't function properly.

When he came out of the dressing room you sure you stared a little too long at him "you like it?" He asked, smiling slightly. "I swear it's the best one yet, I love it when there is a lot of accessories in a outfit" you say. "I know" Hongjoong said, you were confused, what does he mean he knows? But you let it slide. You where not gonna let this get awkward. You told him to stand in front of the camera and the rest of the shoot went by quickly.

It was now 3 pm, the shoot was done and hongjoong went back to the dressing room. But he forgot his phone on the table next to the camera. When you picked it up to give it to him you saw a message from yourself on his phone. When i say your heart dropped it was not an understatement. Did you send him a instagram message? You questioned yourself so you went to double check on your own account. But no, the only one you had texted was your online friend. It couldn't possibly be him right?

You knock on his dressing room door and he sticks his head out, "y/n, what's up" "can you explain why you have a text of Me on your phone?" You say. "What? Where you going through my phone" "no you left it on the table next to my camera and I send a text message to what I thought was my online best friend but then your phone pings and I saw my username pop up. So explain, why were you being someone else?" He sighs "Come in please"

Once you've settled on the couch he begins explaining, "look, I can't follow you with my real account, people would've start questioning things and they would've started texting you about me. It was never my intention to Lie to you about it. But I love your work and I just wanted to contact you about it at first" he explained. You get it, you really do but you start to think back to all the conversations you had with him. And you remember one very clearly, last week when you hung op on jongho you texted him saying 'omg I am gonna photograph Hongjoong, now I am gonna see if he's really that hot in real life'

"I texted you ABOUT you, I've said so many stuff about you? I'm so embarrassed" you say and you can feel your cheeks burning. "You are embarrassed? I am the one who should be embarrassed" Hongjoong said, he sits down next to you and tries to make sure you have nothing to be ashamed of.

"But am I as hot as you thought I should be?" You don't answer. "Too shy to say it now, you said worse things about me tho" you looked at him "don't remind me hongjoong" you say, clearly ashamed of what you said. "Yk it's kinds hot when you told what you find hot about me like 3 monts ago, haven't stopped thinking about it since. Oh and the way you send daily vlogs about your day to me is so adorable, it's the highlight of the day. But when you send me that one outfit haul with the black long dress for the party, the one with the split and the cleavage was showing. I would be lying if I didn't get off that night"

"Are you serious?" He nods "yes, you have nothing to be embarrassed about y/n. I'm worse" "you're not worse" you state. While he was talking you where staring at his lips. "What compliments did you like the most then huh?" You say.

"When you said my hands would make a pretty necklace, got my head spinning while thinking about it" He said. "Let's make it happen then" you say.

Hongjoong lips attached to yours, the kiss wasn't so loving, it was rather hungry and messy. He pulled you on his lap and, he groaned in your mouth when you moved your hips downwards. His hand creeps from the back of your neck to the front, he disconnected the kiss and looked at you. You already looked fucked out and he had barely even started.

"Just as pretty as I imagined" He said. "Just shut up and fuck me already" you whined. "I'm taking my time with you" "well I am not taking my time with you" you slid of his lap and sat on your knees in front of the couch, in-between his legs.

You buckled his belt lose and in the process your hand brushed against his hard on, he bit the inside of his mouth to stay silent. His eyes stayed on you the whole time while you were u dressing him. Now he is only left in His underwear.

You get up and sit on his lap again, you connect your lips together and slide your hand from his torso to the waistband of his pants, you slide your hand in his underwear and you wrap your hand around his cock, you can already feel the precum comming put of his tip.

You start stroking your hand up and down, hongjong needs more, he bucks his hips upwards and moans in your mouth.

You get down on your knees again and take of his underwear in the meantime, his cock springs free and your hand is around it again in no time. You lower your head and lick his cock from the bottom to the top, he throws his head back and cursed your name. Once you reach the top you take the tip in your mouth and swirl your tongue around it.

He grabs a fistful of your hair and pushes you down a bit, you give in and start to bob your head up and down in a smooth motion. After a few minutes Hongjoong pulled out of your mouth "I can't hold it any longer and I want to be in you when I cum" He says, out of breath.

He lays you down on the couch and starts to prep you, he wets his fingers by sucking on them and God that looked hot. He first fingers you with two fingers but he soon noticed that you're so wet that he can easily add another one, you moan at the stretch when he adds the third finger.

"I'm ready joong" you manage to get out, and he does not need more consent. "Do you have a condom?" He asks, you shake your head "shit" He curses, "I'm clean" you say, looking at him with big eyes, "me too, you wanna do it without?" You nodded at him.

He hovers above you and lines up, he moves his hips slowly to let you adjust. Once you've adjusted fully he bottoms out slowly just to quickly push his cock back in. He looks at the way your boobs move when he pushes himself back in and decides to grab one of them, gently squeezing it.

"I can't hold it in much longer baby" He whines, you clench around him and he fastens his pace, his hand wraps around your neck and squeezes it, not to hard but hard enough to feel it. "You where right, pretty necklace" He says out of breath.

"I'm cumming" you moan, and a few seconds later you do, while you cum you clench even harder around hongjoongs cock and you moan out his name. That sends him over the edge and cums too. His semen is spilling out of you because it's so much.

Both of you are laying breathlessly on the couch, rethink about what just happened.

I just had fucking sex with Kim hongjoong, was the only thing you could think about.

Leave a like if you liked it!!! X.R

#ateez smut #smut #ateez #ateez fanfic #hongjoong smut #hongjoong #kim hongjoong

[milkywayes]

dreamt a cipher

a shepard/garrus post-destroy ending longfic.

[AO3 link]

I’ve debated a while about when to start posting this. Now it’s the new year, and I’ve been working on Cipher for over a year and a half, and I’ve waited long enough to start sharing it with you all. I’ve decided it’s finally time to start uploading while I work on the final chapters.

I started writing this before I ever drew a single piece of fanart for Mass Effect. It’s all the things that were bouncing around in my head after choosing the destroy ending with a mostly-paragon Shepard—consequence and responsibility and self-recrimination; her relationship with Garrus and with herself; their ties to each other and how much weight they can bear; their differing perspectives and how they slot together—all that fun stuff—compressed into a story, a place, a narrative. 

I believe in the power of love, and I promise a happy ending. They’ve just been taking the long way to get there. Feel free to yell at me in the meantime.

A huge thank you to @callista-curations for her meticulous and invaluable beta work, and to @that-wildwolf and @gammaraydeath for being the best hypemen I could ask for!

A more detailed list of warnings can be found on AO3.

I've posted the full cover art here.

────

Summary:

Pairing: Female Shepard/Garrus Vakarian Rating: M (subject to change) Important Tags: post-destroy ending - angst with a happy ending - slow burn (of sorts) - arguing - reconciliation - survivor guilt - minor original characters Her own personal Noverian peak. That’s what it was supposed to be. Nothing but the discovery: no distractions, no comfort, no windows looking out—no familiar faces. But it's starting to look like her winning streak might have ended in that pile of Citadel rubble, if it ever extended that far to begin with. ──── “How does the Earth idiom go? No use beating a dead—” A long-suffering sigh. “What was it again?” “A dead horse. And yet, you’re here. Beating it.” Pot, kettle. She wishes he’d just fucking say it.

-> AO3.

Read the start of Chapter 1: Constant Velocity under the cut!

────

The overhead lights flicker as they always do when the data screens are up and running. It’s not something one gets used to, even so. It stings at her ocular nerves—or something like that, anyway, somewhere along the delicate wires that extend from her eyeballs into her brain—but her focus on the data doesn’t waver.

“In that case,” says Shepard, squinting against the ache, “what we need is salvage from a relay outside the immediate burst zone. Four jumps away. Five, if possible. There’s no point to any of this if we can’t scrape together a control group.”

She glances back at Elsawy, who so far hasn’t made it more than a meter into the room. She nods without looking up from her omni-tool; orange shimmers off her shiny, black hair, giving her the uncomfortable air of a Cerberus operative. Not the worst comparison, except that Miranda would waste no time letting her know if her logic took a faulty turn somewhere. Elsawy’s just as likely to agree now and write a message detailing all her crap conclusions later.

Leaning her hip against the conference table, Shepard shifts her weight off her left leg, bites down on the sigh that almost manages to slip out. Once in the clear, she grouses, “Where the hell is Meyer? He’s the one that called this meeting.”

As it is, it’s three people in attendance and she’s the only one talking. She could’ve achieved the same results with a voice call from her quarters, where she could elevate her leg in peace and without witnesses. In the dark.

“Lab Two,” answers Elsawy, finally ripping her attention off the omni-screen and gracing Shepard with a second of eye contact. Maybe in another life she could appreciate the effort—Jesus, as if she hasn’t had her fill of lives already. “We’re close to a breakthrough on the initial output patterns. Sorry. He’s been feeding his data to me.”

“Right.” She blinks once, twice, in time with the flickering. It doesn’t help; it never does. “I’ll swing by later, then. Anything else he asked you to relay?” 

“Just that, Commander.” Elsawy is mumbling just enough that her voice has to compete with the drone of the air vents. The translator takes a second to filter out and amplify it. The result is less than perfect: “More salvage—” bzzrt—“bigger picture, you got it.” She narrows her eyes, and Shepard raises a brow. “Left leg or—” bzz!—“left hip?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Commander.”

“It’s nothing relevant,” she says pleasantly, forcing herself to stand up straight again. There’s a brief tremor shaking up her hamstrings; she waves a hand to distract from it. In the frenzy of the lights, the movement looks jerky, nervous. She soldiers on. “Old field injury. Unrelated. Anything can set it off.”

Funny, kind of, since it’s that very leg that ends in the most perfect, cooperative example of a foot she’s ever had the pleasure of treading on. It’s cloned; a replacement. Not the only one either. They should’ve just done away with the whole limb, but she hadn’t been consulted. Same with her trick shoulder. Not even Cerberus had managed to get that one back on the straight and narrow.

“I’d rather you bring it up with the doctor,” replies Elsawy. This is, apparently, what it takes for her to finally speak at a reasonable volume. “If we manage to fill even one of the data gaps…”

“I know,” she says. “I know, and I’m telling you, it’s unrelated.”

-> continue reading on AO3

#mass effect fanfiction #shakarian #fanfic #shakarian fic #oh GOD. here it is. I'm BIRTHING this baby like Shepard birthed grunt #I'm so nervous but I am really proud of this story so Take it. #cipher tag

[deluweil]

I know it's been a while, but with the new 911 season coming up ( I will not be watching,probably check in every now and again) I wanted to share my own self check of how I view relationships on tv.

After S6 finale, I was like lost and furious, I mean, I wanted and still do want the last 6 years of my life back from 911. (Well three because they didn't always suck).

But I went back to watching normal TV, you know, the kind that portray relationships and are being clear of the direction.

I watched Good Omens, so rooting for that pair, they are the best! And with that cast of unbelievably talented actors, I enjoyed every minute of it. Point is I didn't allow myself to see that friendship as a ship because of how damaged my perception of on screen relationships became after 911 displaying all the right signals, then taking a hard left into a tree at the end of the seasons.

I am not even going to to touch the First Prince of RW&RB, which is essentially a buddie storyline that was followed through to its logical conclusion.

I also thought, maybe I just can't enjoy straight on screen relationships anymore and I'm looking for more.

My sister sat me to watch Bridgerton for the very first time (just S1 for now) I can say with absolute certainty that it dis-abused me of that theory as well, because I rooted and got excited for Daphne and Simon at first sight.

Such a wonderful love story told right!

These are the two prominent tv shows that cemented my belief that it is in fact not on me.

Going back in my head I remember rooting for Catherine and Steve, and almost every one of Danny's gfs (except Rachel, it was clear she'd break his heart again.) In H50.

I wanted Gibson to end up with Andy in Station 19. Never wanted her to end up with Maya or him with Miller.

And even though it didn't need to be said, but was said in a humorous fashion, the writers also made clear that Gibson prefer women.

So it is in fact the flawed 911 writing that got me to give up on all forms of logic of reading tv relationships right.

That I gave up on tv for a while.

But, that being said, I can say I was always attracted to Ryan, but Eddie always got my gaydar to go off. And Oliver is not my type, but Buck is a hot bi firefighter - and that is a thing I already thought in S1, way before Eddie arrived.

So either the writers has no clue what they're doing, or they did and chickened out last minute.

And I finally reached the point where, I throw in the towel, wish you all well and move on.

It is not just about buddie, it is just a buddie post.

If anyone is interested, I can make a whole post involving the "development" of the rest of the og characters, where I say enough is enough.

Either make them interesting again, or bring in new blood that hasn't been first a piece of ass to further Buck's questionable development.

Let me know if you are interested.

The blinders are off and I am not keeping quiet for the sake of followers anymore.

9-1-1 was a great show, 3 seasons ago. They had sparks every now and again in between, but those were few and always demolished in some way by horrible writing choices.

Thank you for a great time, this fandom has been a place to come to whenever I needed to escape reality, I love you all. ❤️

#buddie #eddie diaz #evan buckley #for the last time #Damaged storytelling #No it's not us #Good luck on abc

[fandoomrants]

Said I'll write my thoughts on the relationship between Sabine and Ezra and here it is.

This post is not anti any ship, it's just how I see the characters and their dynamics.

I gotta admit, when I started watching the Ahsoka series I was familiar with the majority of the Clone Wars and I had a vague idea what Rebels is about. I hadn't watched it though, and didn't know too much about the characters and how important it is for this show (I fixed this mistake after ep 2 and this was the best thing. Like honestly, I watched it all in a few days and I'm obsessed with it ever since, omg, I love them all).

So, basically I knew who the characters were in general, not really what the relationships between were, only that basically this guy Ezra and Thrawn had somehow went to another Galaxy with the help of Space whales. And I knew Sabine wanted to bring him back, no idea what they were.

And tbh, I just found this so logical. Like, I watched the first two episodes of Ahsoka, saw her watching the hologram and them all discussing the map and all and I wondered whether they were a thing or not. In any case, I totally understood her and her willingness to do anything to find him.

Then I watched Rebels and I could see from the first episodes that it was hinted he sorta had a crush on her, which later somewhat faded, or at least they actually became very close friends and he wasn't just the younger boy that she would tease anymore.

And then I continued watching Ahsoka. And I could still understand why she wanted to find him, even though they weren't a thing.

And I also didn't blame her one bit when she gave the map to Baylan. It made lots of sense to me. She had lost Ahsoka and thought she's all alone. If she hadn't given it, she would have been probably killed anyway and she would have never had the chance to see him again and that's all that was left for her, literally, as it later got revealed that her family was dead. Like, sure, Hera was still out there and they kept in touch but while I've always seen the whole Ghost crew as a family, I somewhat think they all had different dynamics. While Ezra was literally the child and Hera was almost like his second mother, I've always seen the relationship between Sabine and Hera more like a younger/older sister rather than mother/daughter. And Ezra was the heart of this crew. He had a different relationship with each of them yet I believe because he was the youngest and just so... witty, mischievous, brave, you know, Ezra, they all cared for him so deeply. And because they all had different dynamics between each other and the two of them were so close in age, their bond compared to them and anyone else (maybe except Ezra and Kanan, but again, different dynamics there) was really one of the strongest. They understood and cared for each other on a bit of a different level because they could see each other as equals. They didn't feel the other as if an older relative, mentor or something like that. They were two teenagers and friends who had gotten to be so close and care for each other. And the rest of the crew had found one or another purpose in their life and thing to do while Sabine had remained where Ezra had lived, hoping to find him one day. So, in that moment, he was all Sabine has left for real. He told her he counted on her. Directly turning to her. Years of not knowing where he is and finally having the chance to see him again vs dying and not knowing what even happened to him was basically failing him. If I were here, I wouldn't have even hesitated for someone so close to me.

And then the show proceeded, they got reunited and they just had this cute and sweet banters all the time. And Ezra's "I missed you" in the last episode. That's the cutest thing he could have said. At first I thought this was what meant as "his excuse", then I gave it a second thought and it could have been just him saying he missed her witty and slightly sarcastic comments but still, it showed just how much he had thought of her and relied on her all these years.

What I've been trying to say is, honestly, I don't really ship them actively but from all Sabine ships, this one based on all the interactions makes the most sense to me, if she had to end up with anyone. I feel they'd be healthy for each other. No hate for any ships as I said bit it's just making the most sense. And I won't be mad if they decided to make them get together. And I also wouldn't be mad if they just let them be very close friends. Honestly, I think it can work as a very deep friendship too. I love close non-romantic bonds between characters too. I'll be mad only if they never met again. Because they have so much potential to support each other and help each other heal and grow. They can be each other's support and strength.

#star wars #ahsoka #sabine wren #rebels #sw #ezra bridger #rant

[a-pale-azure-moon]

Random TotK Thoughts #2

I've gotten a bit further, having completed one regional phenomenon, found a few more dragon's tears, and done some sidequests and exploring. I am having so much fun!!!

Specific things under the cut just to be safe.

-Something I forgot to mention in the first post, but how awesome is it that your horses carry over? I love that the devs included this little bonus. I spent so much time catching horses in BotW just for fun, so it's extra nice having all of my favorite ponies around for another tour of Hyrule.

-Where did Zelda find that gold horse though? How does a gold horse even exist in the first place? It even looks metallic with the way light refracts off of its coat. Bizarre. xD

-Penn's "Soar Long!" is the best/worst catchphrase ever.

-The journey up to the Wind Temple was great. Just climbing higher and higher, using the islands as "stairs" to reach the eye of the storm. I can't say I was very impressed with the dungeon itself though; it's an improvement over the Divine Beasts in terms of design, as it feels like it has its own identity rather than just repeating the same aesthetic as the shrines, but the puzzles and layout were very basic and once again, the goal was to activate five things. It's still a downgrade from a more traditional Zelda dungeon.

-I did like having to fuse a giant icicle to a broken handle though. That was a neat idea. And the Colgera boss fight was good and very fun, if a bit easy. I'd rate the whole sequence as like, a B overall, i.e. good but still has room for improvement.

-Tulin is cute as heck and his skill is useful. His headshots are even more useful (except when the enemy falls off an edge and I lose the drops, which has happened a lot). I've still found myself missing Revali's Gale a little though. :/

-I killed my first Frox in the depths on my mission to get Autobuild. It was almost completely dark since I hadn't found the next Lightroot, so it took me a minute to notice the ore deposits on its back. I kept shooting its eye and wondering why it was barely doing any damage, lol.

-Imagine my surprise when I ran into a Yiga down there, and then when Kogha showed up. I like how this is a "logical" way for him to have survived his confrontation with Link back in BotW. And that he's still an idiot who's easy to beat.

-Did Link just give Zelda his house in Hateno? (Also, I appreciate that the photo from the Champion's Ballad is still on the wall. Another nice little continuity touch.) Interesting though that the table is set for two but there's only one bed....

-After I visited Robbie at the lab and got the shrine sensor (finally), whom did I see casually flying by but Naydra! And man....I'm so psyched that you can actually land on the dragons now. I hitched a ride on her for quite awhile, and it helped me reach a couple of towers and scout for some other points of interest. And I harvested a few of her parts too, of course.

-I was surprised to discover that she goes into the depths (I assume Farosh and Dinraal do as well). I almost fell off when she started diving and then I realized we were entering a chasm. Neat!

-Also, I love how her body undulates as she flies, and she makes this soft purring/growling sound too. It's the little details like this that make the game world feel so real and immersive.

-Knowing now that Mineru tinkered with the Purah Pad in the distant past, I'm getting a headache trying to figure out if Sheikah technology derived from Zonai technology, or if it's actually the other way around because of time travel shenanigans.

-Also, you can't tell me that Zelda, the massive history nerd, didn't take at least one selfie with her great-great-great-great (etc) grandparents and many, many pictures of ancient architecture and technology while she was in the past. Somewhere on the Purah Pad is a hidden file filled with hundreds of photos that she took. Change my mind!

-I have a mighty need to know how Rauru and Sonia met and what their courtship was like. This two second interaction in Memory #2 begs for elaboration.

(She hit him with a closed fist! The look he gives her just sends me, and then he rubs the spot afterwards like it bruised.)

-I like how Sonia's reaction to Zelda is basically, "I'm taking her home with me and adopting her."

-I'll confess to my idiocy that I didn't immediately notice that Rauru has three eyes; I thought its lid and lashes were part of his facial markings (tattoos?) until I looked more closely. Does he keep it closed by choice or does it only open as a reflex in certain situations? I'm guessing the latter since Mineru's third eye is closed as well.

-It's funny to me that he literally has hair down to his heels and his sister's hair is cropped so short it's almost unnoticeable under her ears and visor. xD

-Also, bless the animators for actually using Rauru's magnificent ears to show some of his emotions. The way they twitched in Memory #3 made me grin so much.

-I think I've figured out what the major plot twist of this game's going to be. It can't be a coincidence that Mineru mentioned a forbidden power of draconification and that there was a dragon that flew right next to the Great Sky Island to allow Link to descend to Hyrule, can it? Hmm...

#legend of zelda #totk #totk spoilers #my ramblings #totk rauru

[birdmenmanga]

hm... just finished my first playthrough of disco elysium! going to talk about my first game in detail under the cut...

Okay so when I started the game the vegetarian guy was with me and he picked some of the dialogue options. and by that I meant he kept going for superstar cop options because he thought it was funny and you know. I'm more of a sorry cop myself but I do understand commitment to the bit so at the end of the game I think I was 11 superstar and 13 sorry and some bits of the others, but mostly just those two.

I can't remember the exact preset I started off with but I think it was something like 2 INT 5 PSY 4 (the pink one) and 2 (the yellow one) and honestly I think that was a pretty solid base? I do want to play a new game with higher int though. it was killing me when I could piece things together but harry couldn't. me banging on the screen. harry. harry your logic king. please (also I love conceptualization. idk how to live without conceptualization. this playthrough really killed me.)

so with regards to the case... I still can't tell whether I got a good ending...? I think it was probably middling if I had to guess... not the best but not the worst, either.

I managed to find the bullet hole in the corpse's body, which I think made things much easier, and I THINK I arrested the right guy (the deserter)... but also the tribunal happened and like. all the hardie boys died except 2. which seems a bit cringefail, but if there's a silver lining Kim made it through (can he die?) because I passed the authority check (the lieutenant trusts me +1, Kim REALLY trusts me +2 <- when did this happen btw??? I have no clue......)

I really fucked up my timing for things because I really wanted to steal the shoes off the body. so I took them off like... Wednesday night maybe? And then told Kim to take the body away Thursday morning. like almost as soon as I woke up. which meant kim was away the entire day. and like... that was really bad. I went to talk to the tenant in the apartment whose husband died on the boardwalk and I even had the foresight to put on my empathy outfit and I STILL bungled it and wished Kim was with me!! And then I figured out where Ruby was but like. it literally wouldn't let me through the FELD building without Kim by my side so I was also stuck on that!!

I don't think I got into the harbor until day 3 which seems REALLY slow considering that one prokopetz post that was like yeah you can die from sitting on a chair so uncomfortable in the beginning of the game. But like. I wasn't strong enough to beat measurehead and my savoir faire wasn't good enough to get my jacket until wednesday so. well. that's how it is.

One thing that really shocked me is the way like. Rene just straight up died ? Like dang. yeah. that's true. people do die just like that.

One thing I wasn't sure about was like. Kim and everyone seemed really disappointed that I didn't arrest Klaasje or Ruby? But like. They weren't guilty of shooting Lely, which is the case that I was sent to solve, and even though they had some suspicious other stuff going on like. What Titus said about Martinaise really stuck with me you know? Like this is where people go when they have nowhere else to go. Probably everyone in the streets here could be arrested for something if you looked hard enough.

The game ended for me on Monday, which idk if that's just standard the way pathologic is 12 days and is always 12 days or whether that was just how it was this playthrough... guess I'll have to see...

I managed to perceive the insulindian phasmid which was insane to me. like at the end when the precinct 41 guys were all pissed at me I was SUPPOSED to wave around the photograph of the insulindian phasmid and they were like "aw shucks. guess he did something important after all." WHICH WAS SO FUNNY TO ME? DOES IT MATTER??? ?? ? it's good press?? is it????

I bought the FALN headless rider figurine because I thought it would get me clout with Cuno but it ended up being important in the dream with Dolores... man. that was so much. sorry about the divorce king. even though you weren't even married. so so sorry about that. you're doing your best now. I'm doing my best now.

Which I think is something that was done SO well in this game, btw. I think in a lot of RPGs (read: visual novels because those form the majority of the RPGs I play) you're playing as a blank slate kind of guy... which I guess in some ways Harry IS. But he also very much isn't a blank slate in the way that you have to deal with the repercussions of his previous actions... the motorcarriage in the ice... trashing the room in Whirling-in-Rags... the responsibilities of being a cop... the weight of Dolores on his mind... things like that. I knew he was a huge mess going into the game but I really was like ohhhh no. no no no. that's so bad. jesus. I didn't do that did I.

And when, at the end of the first night, I didn't have enough money to stay at the Whirling-in-Rags, and Kim was like "here I've got these spinners that you can pawn off. I didn't exactly want to do this but... here."? I was like. crying and sobbing. im so sorry. im trying. im trying so hard. I'm going to make sure that I don't waste this. (this is why I'm a sorry cop i guess)

I feel like I rarely feel so strongly about in-game events like this. But you're not just a blank slate in a generic world, you're someone real who exists in just a tiny tiny corner of a complex and vast world, and I think THAT'S what makes it all so real and convincing and brings out the empathy in me: because I care, not just about Kim, but this city, this country, its past, the man I'm playing as, every passerby and building and the ocean that quietly hugs the town, it's all so beautiful and mundane and grotesque all at once. I don't quite know how to explain it but it's like that one poem or text that's like "sometimes I like to imagine that I've died and I've begged god to come back and I realize that everything, even the little things that I had come to despise, were truly beautiful and the things I felt annoyed by had a new light to it that I had lost sight of in my day to day, mundane life." Like Martinaise is supposed to be a shithole, you know, a garbage part of the Revachol, where all the scum lives— and yet, when you wake up and remember nothing of the world, and you're looking at it all for the first time... it's beautiful, isn't it? (it is. it's a beautiful game.)

On a different note, I have a friend who considers music to be spoilers. He staunchly refuses to listen to music of a game he's currently playing, because he thinks listening to it for the first time as he enters an area or a fight is integral to the experience. I used to not understand, but I think I kind of get it now. I really do love the sound design in Disco Elysium...

Maybe after my second playthrough I'll have more thoughts? But for now I think I need to put it aside. Every time I open it I'm like straight gaming for 8 hours which is decidedly Not Good.

#just thinking thoughts... #disco elysium #I really am truly sorry about maintagging it but I'm scared I won't be able to find this post in the future if I don't :(( #<- something a sorry cop would say

[otherworldlygate]

Today is the day I finish some outlines I hope. Current progress is something like this (under a readmore to save your dashes):

Swallow the Ground: This is the sequel to Break Open the Sky, and is 90% outlined. I just need to wiggle in a tertiary plot that I'd like to carry into the third story in the series. Outline is sitting around 6,200 words and the story takes place over a full calendar year. The main plot is about Regal, Zelos, Sheena, and Raine trying to compile enough evidence against Sybak to have it shut down, with some help from Kate, Presea, Genis, Viscount Alaric, and a half-elf informant who lived most of their long life in Sybak and has plenty of evidence to spare. The secondary plot is the romance, which focuses most heavily on Raine's struggle as an asexual woman who never really processed her past relationship trauma. Even though Regal told her he didn't care how long it took for them to figure things out/things to progress between them, she still feels pressure to be ready before that one-year anniversary hits. She does a lot of conflating love and sex in the "if I love him enough I should be comfortable having sex with him" sense. As far as a tertiary plot goes, I'm thinking something along the lines of exspheres and the exsphere mines—something to draw Lloyd and Colette into the third story in the series more directly.

--

Balacruf Mausoleum Fic: The completion status of this one is hard to define. The trauma of the accident is entirely outlined, but this is the kind of story where it's difficult to figure out where to go afterward because there isn't a big catch-all solution to the issues that plague the characters. The outline is about 6,100 words long right now.

I do think any story centering on certain characters in ToS probably tends to struggle with a similar issue to what I'm looking at here, which is more or less difficulty finding a good/believable stopping point because the grind never ends. Think about Lloyd's journey to gather all the exspheres or Zelos's responsibilities in Tethe'alla in the post-game: it feels like there's no stopping point in their lives because the characters will never get a real break. In the case of this story, Raine and Regal pay pretty heavy prices for being in the wrong place at the wrong time when the Balacruf Mausoleum caves in on them. While Raine is at least logically free to do whatever she wants after this is over, Regal has to return to his life in Altamira and all the responsibilities that wait there for him while continuing to deal with his share of the consequences. Like Zelos and Lloyd, there isn't really a point where he gets a break; too many people depend on him.

This also isn't the usual kind of story for me. Sure, I love torturing my blorbos, but I don't usually delve into trauma-bonding or magic, and one of the big plots of this story is centered on the idea of what might happen if Raine severely over-extended herself as a healer as a "last stand" kind of thing and accidentally formed a very literal link/connection with the person whose life she was trying to save. And because I'm writing it, of course, this device skews toward having far more downsides than upsides, and it's almost made worse with the trauma-bonding. So while Raine is logically free to go her own way once the dust settles (so to speak), emotionally it becomes a much more difficult decision for her.

But where does a story like this go, other than smack into the daily grind of the characters as they try to untangle everything? And this, I am finding, is quite difficult to outline.

--

Declining!Tethe'alla: Character backstories are 90% complete and part of the journey arc is outlined. Sitting at 6,300 words. I don't really know what else to say about this one except that there were at least 10 ways to write any particular character arc, and I went with what seemed most appealing to me/what worked best in tandem with other character arcs.

Here are some small tidbits: Seles is Tethe'alla's Chosen of Regeneration. Zelos is the one tasked to carry on the mana lineage. Both Mylene and Seles's mother (named Carina in this story unless she has an official name) are alive. Sheena is a celebrated hero/summoner. Colette is Sylvarant's Chosen of Mana and Lloyd is her right-hand man/bodyguard/sidekick/bestie. Anna is alive. Regal has been at a human ranch for half his life. Raine and Genis are Sybak's property. Presea's story is similar to the game but somehow 10x worse.

A few characters were aged up for the sake of a better/more interesting/more believable storyline. Several relationships from the canon are also altered or changed in some way (including Raine and Genis's).

Speaking of Raine and Genis, I really wanted to avoid them being in Sybak because I feel like everyone jumps to that, so I toyed with the idea of Raine as a Desian (thanks @ciryze LOL) and while this would grant me some great storyline stuff between my blorbos if they were both at the same ranch (rapport before they meet the others!) I felt like that sort of story had a lot of short-term strength, but not enough staying power for the rest of the tale I wanted to tell. It also makes Genis a tough character to write.

Also, it's probably worth mentioning that I don't think many people actually want to read my take on Raine as a Desian; it wouldn't be that dark or interesting lmao. (I might have a one-shot brewing for this, though.)

Anyway, as it turns out, it's exceedingly difficult to ensure all these characters meet without some outside influence. While it's true that Raine and Genis could meet the Chosen's Group by pure coincidence, I would prefer a story that felt a little more intentional, especially for characters who will matter even more in a story where the Chosen herself is a half-elf. So I went with Sybak. But oops, it's not the Sybak you know and love!

The most difficult part about outlining this story is definitely getting all the characters together in a timely manner and not boring the shit out of my audience. We all played the game, after all, and we know what the Chosen's journey entails and how it should theoretically end. The second most difficult part is purely logistics-related: which human ranch goes where, which grand cardinal oversees it, how to weave in so many varying perspectives into one story, what the fUCK to do with Kratos other than let him show up, do nothing, reveal nothing, then leave, the order of the seals, and so on.

And then the third hardest thing is being nitpicky about character stuff. Let's use Regal for an example. So if he's been at a human ranch for the last 18 years, he should be long dead. He's not, so I had to figure out why. Through pure spite (or any other strong emotion) he doesn't let his exsphere awaken? He's too physically useful to be thrown away? He's not allowed to die too easily because he has to pay for the sins of his family? The Desians are intrigued by his ability to heal and use a little magic even though he reads as human to them? He has elven blood way back in the bloodline and the Desians take a small measure of pity on him? Is it possible he is being used in an experiment like the Angelus Project? Multiple of the above?

And then bigger questions, like which cardinal is most likely to have allowed this to happen? And where should this ranch be located so that the main characters can run into Regal at the right time?

We can't forget the emotional stuff, either! For example, after 18 years of mistreatment in a human ranch and seeing so many humans die at the hands of half-elves, how does Regal react to the literal Chosen being a half-elf? What about Raine and Genis, who were exploited by humans for the last 14 years?

And this isn't even getting into the backstory of his family, or George's role in anything. And this is just Regal! There are a lot of other characters, and I feel exceedingly picky about all of them.

I'm maybe 20% through this outline because there's just so much to consider.

--

One-night Stand Fic: The happier outline is 1,800 words (while the tragic version is 4,600) but it's maybe only like 30% complete. I think I'm going to go with the happier story because my blorbos need a break and there's something to be said about the consequences of a one-night stand being terrible enough on their own.

Like, imagine having to tell the friend that you banged a couple of months ago on a whim that uhhhh there's a baby now. There's something particularly bad about Raine being the one who has to get up the courage to say something, too; the world is prejudiced and while logically she's certain Regal will take the news in stride/take at least some responsibility, it's still a scary conversation to have.

Like, he is her friend, and she likes him, but this is a life-changing thing to announce. There is no way for her to know with 100% certainty how he will react to it. He has literally all of the power here.

What a terrifying situation to be in. And also to have to sail to Altamira when already suffering morning sickness? Hahaha. RIP.

#ruin mode: engage #wish me luck today lmao

[250813soulmates]

My Life Review

Est: 2002-2011 Getting punished by my parents & beaten for every "wrongdoing" in my life & underperformance in school. Shit ton of unrequited love because I had no balls to interact with anyone. Extremely quiet/emo because I was too embarrassed to be myself; I'm weird. At some point, probably lower primary school I was molested by my cousin for a couple of months. No sexual knowledge and had no idea what was going on. Eventually, consciousness hit and I initiated a halt to everything. Games and anime were my only saving grace from those suffocating times.

2013: First exclusive date with a classmate (1.5yrs). Life was truly amazing.

2014: Got bullied in poly for a year because I was a slow learner and a dumb fuck at programming, but I eventually became relatively good at it & came in first for a prestigious competition that was even featured in the school's magazine.

2015: I lost my first love and fell into depression. Got dumped and I reacted extremely badly. Filled with anxiousness & hatred; spammed and judged and was so rude and emotional to her because of what she did to me. I was an extremely insecure & emotional person with no sense of logic.

2016: Took my emotions for a ride and competed in a physique competition. Lost with pride because I brought my best package amongst a group of druggies.

2015-2017: Living hell, depression, suicidal, self-harm. Think of the worst and i've either tried or at least thought about it. Wanted to be a "fuck boy" and started smoking, drinking, and clubbing and learning how to "have game" which i quickly quit (except smoking) because i wasn't being true to who i am.

Early 2017: Second date from tinder (6months). Dating app was never a good idea. Generally filled with either depressed or fucked up people. Congrats we're a match! But hey I've "learned my lessons" and in this relationship, as fucked up as she is, somehow i wasn't insecure at all. Life was great while it lasted.

Late 2017: Of course, it ended badly with third/fourth parties. Went through some details in my 2018 posts below. Fell into depression again. Didn't manage to solve my emotions. When shit went down, i blamed her and hated her like how i did in 2015. Life was miserable as i was in the military. 5 weekday of depression in camp and 2 weekend of unloading all my pain at home for almost a year.

Early 2018 (?): Can't remember which year exactly but at some point the "bad boy" version of me tried to go on more dates and at one point, hooked up with someone. I hated it. I thought being nice wasn't enough so I wanted to be different. I hated who I became and went back to my true self.

Mid 2018: Third love, still in the military. No surprise its from tinder again. Generally filled with either depressed or fucked up people once again. Trying to be co-dependent without first achieving self-love and self-worth. But of course, i can only say and realize this now - because it finally ended, after 5 years. But don't get me wrong, while it lasted, it was amazing going through all thick and thin together. I had complete control over my emotions and still held on to my ability to trust and be 100% secure in the relationship. Learned my lesson from the first two and this time I made plans and asked her to be my girlfriend. Unfortunately for her case, insecurity was a major trait alongside ADHD. This would lead to our eventual downfall.

Well, she was a player who hooked up with different people on a daily/weekly basis. An extremely carefree person who simply wants all the instant gratification she could get. I was potentially "just another guy" to her. This however does no dismiss the fact that she too has been through abuse and shit before.

Early 2019: Caught her nudes on her phone in some hidden telegram folder. I was overseas for 2 weeks for a military operation and during that time she used locanto to sell nudes to make quick cash (which i didn't know what was those photos for at that time). My initial feeling was shock and fear, but just as quickly i recomposed myself, approached her, and forgave her without a second thought or even questioning her. With tears & guilt in her eyes, I hugged her and told her everything would be ok. She thought that i would break up with her, but instead, i gave her a second chance and trust that through this, she would learn her lesson about how it is not worth the risk of losing someone like me. We moved on from here and was happy again.

July 2019: The one and only time but we didn't know better. I had no knowledge about the menstrual cycle and she told me it was safe during her most fertile period. 2 weeks later we were deciding between keeping or aborting. This was probably the toughest time i had to go through in my life. A potential life was at stake, but luckily the heart had yet to form. We negotiated and we weighed the pros and cons. Her motherly instincts were definitely there but we ended up choosing the latter option. I took responsibility and was there for her through every step of it and every procedure i could attend. With a few thousand in my bank, i depleted almost all of it because that was the least I could do as she bears the weight of going through this physical and mental turmoil. The stress we had to go through was insane.

What made it worse was that during this time i had to go for nasal and tonsil surgery. Things were going fine until I was discharged and had complications (5% chance of throat hemorrhage). Ended up being sent to ER thrice in 2 weeks. Each time blood would flow out constantly and choke me up. I had to ice my neck and constantly spit the blood out until the ambulance came. The third time it became so bad I spat out almost 500ml of blood and clots into the blood bag provided by the paramedics on the way to the hospital. This time tho, i was hospitalized for almost a week. Literally had diarrhoea 24/7 from the antibiotics to the point where even the nurses were annoyed. Was on IV drip diet, and I lost ALL my gains. The guilt i had to go through when i was supposed to be there for her, but now she had to constantly be here for me in the hospital is indescribable.

Sept 2019: Started my career as a personal trainer right after ORD. New environment, new structure, and with no idea of what to expect. Stayed with the company until the first circuit breaker of covid which resulted in them closing down. However, it ain't all sunshine and rainbows. I was mentored by a dictator who disciplined and scolded me worse than my parents. Treated like a dog holding my clipboard, paper, and pen, walking to lunch with him while asking questions and taking notes. Everything that had been asked or answered before, i wasn't allowed to ask again before i got a scolding for being dumb. Scolded for my lack of spatial awareness, lack of critical thinking, and being judged for every action i took on the gym floor. Vacuum, mopped, cleared the thrash, and cleaned the toilet, because i was new. Shouted at me and slammed weights on the gym floor once while everyone was around and training clients. Insane personal growth, tough love. Later do I know half the shit he taught was either false or an overcomplication of what was necessary; however the other half was gold.

Late 2019 - May 2022: Life was great with her. Had some ups and downs, but we were grateful for each other and tried to iron out our differences as much as we could.

Sept 2020 - May 2021: Life was great. Worked at a new gym, was respected, promoted and i worked my ass off to develop my skill as a trainer. I would even dare to say i was the best in-house trainer at that place. Had a few drama going on in the company and it did got very toxic. But i was able to steer clear of most of it. However, the gym eventually closed down due to circuit breaker 2. In which i had to find a new place again.

Some time around here i broke down once and probably changed my dad forever. Though he no longer beat me like before, the anger issues and attitude was still as bad. I could vividly remember what really happened. But he got mad and I had fucking enough of this shit. I shouted back at how harsh and shitty he's been, i sat down with my back against the wall and started smashing the back of my head against it countless times it until he ran over to stop me and calm the fuck down. Since then, he's been aware and really, much better.

July 2021: Joined a new gym opened by a friend of mine. Grateful for the opportunity with an arguably higher pay compared to before but damn well a better and premium work environment to further improve my skills as a trainer. Met amazing colleagues there too and got to know all sorts of clients ranging from MNC/SME/Start-up business owners, directors, doctors, lawyers, taitais, rich stay-at-home-moms, rich spoiled brats, traders, corporate workers, pilots to even the low-income ceiling ones trying their best to improve their life by using our service. Steep learning curve at the start, but no biggie.

Dec 2021 - May 2022: A good friend hooked me up with a shady investment. Gave great return and honestly till this day (Nov2023) it is still paying out at about 7% per month. But greed took over, and he introduced me to another one which was 15-20% per month. Naive and uneducated as i was, i Invested half my life savings into both platforms at that point. The latter one got shut down eventually and became an international case and MAS was also heavily involved with it. In order to recuperate my loss, i ventured into cryptocurrency and got myself into even more shady investment schemes, and at one point, i even recruited a whole family tree of people online (10 over investors) to be under my name and got their commissions. I was highballing and reinvesting the gains, rarely ever withdrawing. 3/4 way through my recuperation, I got scammed by a fake admin and lost 80%. With 20% left, the way back up was long, stressful and tedious. Soon after, the platform rug pulled but luckily i was able to withdraw whatever i had left into my crypto wallet. Once again i ventured into many other platforms until one day I got destroyed by a bitcoin pyramid scheme and lost everything again. Withdrew back everything from my first platform due to fear into my fiat bank (DBS).

All or nothing. Sometime after, i got to know someone online, and as stupid as it sounds, i trusted "her" and to cut it short, invested my entire bank account into it. Bit by bit, more and more. I lost close to 6-digits. Platform admin needed me to "pay tax for withdrawal" and "someone reported my account so i needed to top up the balance to prove that i wasn't laundering money" At that point, a few thousand meant nothing and i was too blinded to pull back. Borrowed 2k from my love and 3k from a friend i once lend some money to as a return of favour. Topping my with the last 5k in my bank, needless to say, i lost it all once again. But she was still there for me, being my greatest supporter. Which i will forever be grateful for.

To be clear, this stranger/scammer that i built a friendship with, I made it clear to "her" that i have a girlfriend and that nothing will go on between us. I was in it for the money. Maybe "she" if its even a "she" had other intentions, it was not for me to care about.

And why did i even attempt to try all these? Because she didn't have a plan or a job. I felt the need to be the breadwinner and make her a taitai. I thought only the brave could take the risk and reap the rewards. I wanted to get rich quick and make our life better. I risked it all and lost it all.

May 2022 - Oct 2023: Bankrupted, but i wasn't depressed. I was calmed and composed. I accepted reality as it is and immediately took action to draft out a plan on what i should do moving forward. Stay away from ALL investments and work honestly on my day job until the day i recuperate everything back. Be extremely thrifty and only spend on necessities. I became so hyper focused on money that our relationship took the hit. Well, she tried to be understanding and never once complained. I thought everything was fine and this was simply a phase of downturn. September 2023, I officially recovered all my losses. I felt a great sense of relief and freedom. With a clear mind, I finally start putting in more effort into the relationship and also started to plan on marriage and housing. "I made her wait long enough" I told myself. "Next year i'll have to propose" I told myself. 17th October 2023, we celebrated our 5th anniversary. Everything seemed fine.

25th October 2023: I received a text for a break from the relationship. My heart sank. I knew what was coming. I knew she went out herself to calm her mind and will be back anytime soon. 10:15pm, i stood on the void deck, outside her lift without letting her know until she finally return at 11:20pm. She couldn't look at me in the eye and asked me to go home. I didn't want to be possessive and toxic so I allowed her to head back without stopping verbally/physically. She left me in front of my eyes. Should I have pulled her back? Would anything I say at that point help to change her mind? I will never know the answer. But I know that the reason why i did not act was due to my past 2 relationships. Both ended with me trying so hard to get them back and being all emotional. I didn't want history to repeat itself.

I sat down somewhere trying to process what had just happened. I couldn't. My mind went blank. I texted and ask if I could talk to her, to see her, to stay the night. "Go home" she texted me. "Don't push my buttons". "Go home, don't make me repeat myself". "Take bus home".

My mind was blank. My vision was blurred. Hyperventilating. I knew the bus stop was just a street away yet no matter how i walked, i couldn't find it. Took a few steps in every direction and each time i stop, i didn't know where i was.

25th-29th October: A couple of back and forth texting with me explaining how we could still make it work. How it's not worth ending our 5 years of memories. How we all deserve another chance. How the lessons we learned could have been applied to us again, instead of starting from ground zero with someone new. No hatred, no emotional and reckless talking like I did before. But maybe my sin was too great for her to handle.

"the stranger who scammed you, why was her photo in your deleted album and you answered with your story, i lost trust in you" Why should I keep a selfie of a stranger in my photo album and why are you checking my phone this deeply when you know clearly how much i respect my personal space? You didn't even trust in me since day 1. Yet I was the complete opposite trusting you a 100% even after what you did.

"you changed your phone password and that made things worse. If I could turn back in time, I would have told you how upset I am every single time life comes and hit us w something and we have to delay our plans for the future. How scared I am once my career stabilises, and yours get rocky again. And we have to restart the whole process. I wish I could have told you how much I don't trust you, how much I miss the old us, how much I missed being happy, instead of just being contented"

"I've given you chances and chances again. I always asked you out, but I know you're too tired. So I stopped asking you out and spend time w u at home instead. I know you're too tired, I know what I want; but I don't even dare to ask you out."

"I hate that I love you so much, but I doubt we have a future together. I don't know if I can trust you that you'll start putting effort into this rs. Ever since your incident last year, I've been patient."

"I've been hurt so many times, yet I just kept quiet. When you went out with Marcus (my best friend of 10years which we meet only once or twice a year) I realised how lonely I am without you. I don't want to depend on you for happiness anymore. I need to find it within myself. To fill the void you weren't able to."

"I hate that I know you've been working hard for us. I hate that I don't know if I can see a future w you bc I just have so much doubts. I hate that this has caused me so much pain too"

The old us had no troubles. The old us had all the time in the world to date and be stress free. The me after bankruptcy was fighting for our future. She talk about doubting our future when I was there fighting for it in the present.

I said "If you see yourself 50 years with me then you'll realise you won't have 50 years of the same thing & perhaps this is just 1/50 phase of the relationship" in which she replied "When you're saying all these, do you ever pause and admire the moment? Live in the present?"

So was it our possible future or the present that she was unhappy with? My present had a fuck ton of stress. Crazy workload while dealing with the financial loss and the delay of our future. Was it my fault that i wasn't strong enough to stay active and happy and "live in the moment"? Or was her insecurity and the need for instant gratification the root of our downfall? I asked myself this and I realised that it doesn't matter. There's no need for closure.

She'll be happier without me now and i'm proud that she knows what she want. She's finally heading towards a good career and she's learning to love herself, which is ever so important. Nobody is perfect and each of us are always in the journey of healing. With this, she gave me a new dumped-experience to heal myself from too.

29th October 2023: "I can't ever go back to "us" anymore. I hope you can respect that and let's move onto the next phase of life." She said. This was it. I was sad, but i wasn't depressed. I gave her a few final text to ensure she's certain. I listed out the good and the bad of us. I apologized for my shortcomings and mentioned how grateful am I to have her in my life. I thank her for giving us this opportunity to heal and grow ourselves. Life goes on.

On the same day, i broke down in front of my mother as i spilled the beans and revealed the details. This brought me and my family together, closer than ever before. For the first time, i became vulnerable in front of her.

30th October 2023 - 26th November 2023 (present) : No contact has started and I began my personal healing journey. I left no regrets and accepted life as it is. I've been through too much in life to dread over spilled milk. Everything happens for a reason and with every obstacle, i grew stronger. This is my opportunity for linear growth and I have to take advantage of it. I know i needed to love myself and i know i need to be happy enough as an individual before i jump into another relationship like a dumb dumb again. I know my self worth and i know how loyal, genuine, patient, kind, honest, forgiving, respectful, grateful for every little thing, driven, weird, eccentric, funny and playful i am.

I am not a cheater, i hate letting people down. I strive to work hard but also to live a balance life. I know what i want and i know that whoever that steps into my life next needs to also be a happy enough individual with similar enough mindset as i have. Being into fitness is definitely a huge bonus too since fitness is literally my life. I know that this time it'll be someone i meet in real life and not from dating apps. I know the law of attraction and i know that as long as i continue working on myself, the right one will come one day even without me chasing for it.

Chasing brings the excitement of challenges that'll die along with it once you obtain it. Chasing is a sign of lack of self respect. It needs to come from mutual investment, or move on.

Meanwhile, i'll continue to upgrade my fitness knowledge, explore more into cooking and singing. Take care of myself by dressing better, getting a few more trims and get some skin care routine going on. Spend more time with friends and family which i've neglected my whole life. I'll live my best life knowing that storms will still come ever once in a while. I'll identify and accept those negative feelings. I'll go into a space of observational awareness while waiting for the storm to pass, then jump right back into the path of never ending healing of life again.

In only 26 years i'm glad to have been through most of life's grieves and have the emotional maturity to take on whatever that's yet to come. My only uncertainty to how i'll react is the loss of health which may interrupt/inhibit my training/nutrition routine or the loss of health/life of my parents (no details but my dad's memory has been getting worse rapidly over the past 2 years). But when the time comes, which it will. I have full faith in my future self that i'll be able to handle it.

This is all for now. It's time to be positive. Looking through all my older posts since 2015, I'm fucking proud of where i'm at now & i'm sure my future self will be fucking proud of me taking this step today too.

Hello J from god knows if tumblr will still be around. 5 years? 10 years? Look at me and be glad i've yet to throw my life away and give up. Because of my decision today, you get to be who you are now. BLEH.

[kasplonkable]

Domestic Hcs: Layla El-Faouly

I just get the feeling she's an early riser. But by early riser, I mean she's up an already organising what you're both doing, while also in the process of waking you up too

Like, it'll be 5am and she's there with a cup of coffee, letting you know that she's going on a hike in less than an hour, and you're coming with her

"Babe, it's literally 4:47 AM, the sun isn't even fully up yet"

"But it's almost up, which means we're wasting time!"

Despite that, it's always worth it to see the way the early morning light casts shadows on her face; she looks even more striking than normal in the orange glow of the sunrise

You have these extravagant movie nights, where you end up making a blanket fort and putting up fairy lights, and making hot chocolates heaped with whipped cream and marshmallows

She gently kisses you when you get whipped cream on your top lip

She also gets mad at the movie you're watching, like if it's a horror movie then she's yelling about the logic used

"Oh yeah, great idea!! Split up with a serial killer in the house, what could possibly go wrong?"

But it's worse if it's a romance movie

Both of you will be playfully gagging at the kissing scenes and rolling your eyes at the cheesy lines, giggling whenever something dumb happens

Dancing around the kitchen in fuzzy socks

You get so caught up in the moment that you forget the pasta until it bubbles over, making a loud hiss that makes you both jump

I imagine her house being really bright and airy, and full of cool artifacts

When you first saw them, you thought they were just cool replicas, until you eventually figured out the truth

"Wait, Layla, is that the real statue of khufu?"

"..........it's too nice to sit in a museum"

"How did you even get it?......Babe?!"

It's not like you're going to tell anyone though, so for now it'll just have to stay on the bookshelf, right next to her collection of French poetry

One day you walk into the kitchen to find Layla talking to a stray calico cat at the window. She had given her a small plate of chicken that she'd been cooking for lunch and a bit of water

You didn't want to disrupt the moment by walking in, so you watched from the doorway with the most loving expression a person could muster

After that, the cat would keep coming back. Same time everyday there would be tapping and loud meowing coming from the kitchen; the signal it was time to feed her

You're not quite sure when it happened, but eventually she kind of let herself in, roaming the house, before getting comfortable on the bed and falling asleep

Since then she's never left

Layla always considered herself more of a dog person, but it melts your heart when you see her with the cat curled up in her lap

She has. So. Many. Boots. And because she takes them off at the door, you find yourself tripping over a pair sometimes when you're on your way out

But then, you leave books around the house constantly, sometimes to the point where she can't even see the table underneath all the papers

One would think you get annoyed at eachother for these things, but somehow it's endearing to find boots at the door and know Layla is home from a long day. Just like how she finds books on the table and knows you've become passionate about something new

Despite that, I reckon she's a pretty tidy person

She takes spring cleaning very seriously. On the first day of spring, she puts up a checklist of everything that needs to be sorted out, and systematically works her way through it

It's too much to get done in one day, but you work together and the list is cleared within about a week

It's nice to take a moment to sit down, knowing that there's nothing left to do except curl up, and enjoy eachothers company

---

Is it obvious yet how much I love her? I've been wanting to write this for ages, but studying has been getting in the way. Speaking of, this will probably be my last post for a couple of months. Exam stress is getting real and I want to give myself the best chance I can to do well! I do have some more stuff in the works, but I won't be looking at it until my exams are done. Hope you enjoyed this though, and as always, feel free to request anything and I'll get to it when I can!! :-)

#moon knight #moon knight fluff #moon knight hcs #moon knight headcanon #reader insert #layla el faouly #layla x reader #layla x y/n #layla x you #layla el faouly x reader #layla el faouly x you #layla el faouly x y/n #layla el faouly fluff #domestic fluff #moon knight series #moon knight domestic fluff #moon knight reader insert #disney+ #marvel #mcu #moon knight imagine #layla el faouly imagine #layla el faouly headcannons #layla el faouly hcs #may calamawy #please I'm actually in love with her

[lunarticxenia]

Moon Signs Pt. 2

Hi guys here’s part 2 of the moon sign series! After I post this, I’m going to be focusing more on answering your questions, I have a lot to answer. Thanks so much for all the support! Without further ado, here’s Libra through Pisces moons! 

🌵Libra Moon: You guys LOVE attention, and you don’t even try to hide it LMAO. One of my good friends is a Libra moon and he literally loves to say outlandish things just to get a reaction from us and to get attention from us if we’re not talking to him enough in a conversation. Libra moons also love relationships and if underdeveloped they may feel incomplete without one. They can also be very dependent on their partner for happiness as well. However, they are romantic and in love with love. They’re also extremely sensitive and are very feminine. Even in men, it gives them a more feminine touch to their personality. They also hold their morals in very high regard. They have their set morals and won’t change them for anything or anyone. They also tend to hate conflict and usually shy away from confrontation. They’re also too nice, WAYYYYYY too nice. You guys need to be more assertive LMAO. They’re also extremely optimistic and if they don’t believe in that particular way they at least try to be optimistic with others. They’re always reminding you the glass is half full. Also, Libra moons are mad clingy. Even with those they’re not dating LMAO. My Libra moon friend whenever I try to leave the FaceTime Call, he’s like “Don’t go... :(”. They just love to be around the ones they love. They’re also in love with beauty, and all things beautiful in the world. They’re lovers of music, art, film, and literature. Libra moons also have a softness in their eyes, I can’t describe it. This girl I used to like has a Libra moon and her eyes were just so soft. They’re also extremely indecisive, they tend to flip flop between who they wanna be and what they wanna do. They also aren’t shy when it comes to compliments, they will compliment TF out of you. They’re the best hype man. They also put others before themselves a lot, and can be very shy upon first meeting them. However once they feel comfortable around you they open up. One last thing, I feel like they tend to like anyone who’s nice to them...don’t attack me. LMAO.  

🌵Scorpio Moon: I feel like Scorpio moons have about ten different playlists relating to their emotions and still won’t open up to anyone about how they feel. Scorpio moons I feel have such intense emotions that they just don’t deal with them and they tend to implode after a while. I relate to them a lot in that respect tbh with my Sun square Moon, because that’s how I am. You guys are also super passionate and super creative. Every Scorpio moon I’ve met has been really creative in some way whether it be makeup, fashion style, or artwork. I’ve also noticed that this is a very alluring placement, there’s this intriguing way about them, and like Aries Moons, they have a fire in their eyes. Their gaze is INTENSE. They’re also very selective with who they let close to them, they don’t let just anybody in. They’re also very good at reading other people and seeing people’s true intentions. They have an extremely good intuition. If underdeveloped this can be used to manipulate other people, as well as being compulsive liars. Scorpio moons are also very protective over the ones they love. If you mess with anyone they care about, they will kill you. End of story. Also I feel like every Scorpio moon I’ve met has been through the wringer, like they’ve really had some hard experiences, it’s so sad to me. Scorpio moons are also extremely stubborn, remember this is a fixed sign. Scorpio moons ain’t playing, once they’ve settled on something, they’re not budging. Also, can we just say, masters at investigating people. These are the friends you want stalking your ex’s social media. They will find out everything. They’re also really good psychologists as well, almost all the Scorpio moons I’ve met are actually Psychology majors LMAO. They’re very good at finding the root causes of people’s issues. I also feel like Scorpio moons undergo a lot of transformations in their lives. I’ve known a Scorpio moon for about 10 years now and he’s undergone so many different transformations in his life. Mentally and physically. They’re also extremely sarcastic and have a tendency to be pessimistic. They’re also mad scary when angry. I’ve seen them angry before, as an Aries moon, even I get a little scared.... love y’all tho. 

🌵Sagittarius Moon: The funniest people ever. Sagittarius moons always have me laughing my ass off. Their sense of humor is very diverse. They tend to stick with sarcasm and like to say outlandish things to make people laugh. Also, I feel like Sagittarius moons tend to go for science/math oriented careers or at least have an interest in those subjects. I know four Sag moons, and they’re all in STEM it’s actually crazy. They’re also extremely blunt and honest, especially when it comes to people they don’t like LMAO. They make it very clear when they don’t like someone, it’s so funny. They’re also just so much fun, like they’re genuinely so much fun to hang out with. I feel like I’ve never not had a good time hanging out with a Sagittarius moon. I feel like Sag moons however tend to struggle with asserting themselves a lot of times, until they get really fed up.  They’re very much go with the flow kinda people, and this can be to their detriment especially with the ones they love, they don’t wanna rock the boat. However, they also make really good mediators and are good at settling arguments. They also really like to travel, and likely have traveled a lot. All the Sagittarius moons I know have traveled to at least 4+ countries. They love traveling the world, and I’ve also noticed move or want to move far away from their childhood home. They wanna explore everything the world has to offer. My cousin who’s a Sag moon left her parents’ house to move a few states away and my other friend who’s a Sag moon wants to move to the other side of the country. These individuals also tend to like foreign culture as well. I’ve noticed Sagittarius moons tend to like foreign music or foreign tv shows. I feel like they also tend to ignore their emotions when they get sad and just don’t like to deal with their emotions. They also don’t like to talk about how they feel and will brush sad things off because it’s just too upsetting for them. However, once the emotions boil over, just like their anger, they will blow up LMAO. I’ve also noticed that they’re really good at teaching people things? Like my Sag moon friend explained this Chemistry equation to me I couldn’t understand and I got it after 10 minutes. Natural teachers. 

🌵 Capricorn Moon: Guys, it’s okay to open up. You don’t have to pretend to be so strong all the time, you’re not weak for showing your emotions. Anyway, Cap moons have high expectations for people, and will not tolerate any bs from people. I seriously commend them for that. I feel like Cap moons struggle with how their points are being expressed, they can say one thing, but it’s seen as something else. While Capricorn moons may struggle with expressing their emotions, I haven’t found them to be closed off or cold when meeting them. Every Capricorn moon I’ve met has warmed up to me very quickly and have been super nice. I feel like they’re very friendly and once they have a conversation with you they’re really warm and kind. Also, they’re not afraid of anything?? Except for showing their feelings maybe. But like, they’re so open to trying new things like scary rollercoasters and aren’t afraid to fight for themselves if they have to. Also, super fucking ambitious. I wish I could be ambitious. These people will really have like three jobs, be in school, and tend to household responsibilities. I don’t know how you guys do it. Now everyone says Capricorn moons are just analytical and systematic when confronted with conflict, and I personally haven’t found that to be true. If they feel wronged?? Nah. They’re not going to be systematic or logical or anything. They will go off. As for personal challenges, yes they’ll be more analytical. But I feel like everyone boils down Cap moons to emotionless and machine-like nerds, which I find to be very untrue. Capricorn moons are very soft once they’re vulnerable with you, and genuinely feel like they’re bothering people when they show their emotions and feel weak for showing them. Also I’ve noticed that their mom is a big motivator for their success. Their moms always push them to do their best in work and school. If poorly aspected, they could feel too pressured by their moms to do well. Also, they’re so underrated for being funny. They have a really dry sense of humor and it’s well developed. I also feel like they get overlooked for putting others before themselves, when it comes to the people they love they’ll do anything for them. Brb gonna go give my Cap moon friends a hug. 

🌵Aquarius Moon: You guys are just so unique. There’s something unique about each and every Aquarius moon, whether it’s a quirk or a hobby. These people are literally the best to talk to. It’s so easy to have a conversation with them, they really can talk about anything. I’ve also noticed that Aquarius moons tend to be interested in astrology and tarot and things of that kind. Every Aquarius moon I’ve met has been really interested in it, and even involved in it. I feel like they also have big dreams, and have big plans for themselves. Aquarius moons also love to get lost in their music and tend to use it as an escape. This can be a problem because they tend to avoid dealing with their feelings. They also go between reacting to things really heavily vs not reacting at all. It just seems like it goes back and forth. They speak up with things are unjust however only to their friends or online. They just don’t like to deal with face to face conflict in that regard. They also give really great advice. My best friend is an Aquarius moon and she always gives me the best advice. She knows me better than I know myself tbh. I feel like Aquarius moons relish in being unique LMAO. I’m 99% sure they had an “I’m not like other girls” phase. I feel like this placement always tends to space out and daydream a lot. They also aren’t the types to just lash out at people, their anger is more subtle (unless they have other placements of course). I feel like Aquarius moons also have a lot of friends but they tend to have a small group of friends that they tend to be super super close with. They’re also...really charming? I don’t know what it is, but like every single one I’ve met has been really charming and likable. They also have a really goofy sense of humor and love to do wild shit to make people laugh. I feel like some downsides of Aquarius moons are that they tend to be too analytical and rationalize things too much, and they inadvertently invalidate other people’s feelings. Aquarius moons are also super open minded to all opinions. I have a friend who I tend to disagree with on certain issues but they’ve always been open to hearing my opinion. They also love to travel too. I’ve noticed that as well. 

🌵Pisces Moon: To think, I was almost one of you guys. No seriously I almost was, if I were born four hours earlier I would’ve been a Pisces moon LMAO. Anyhoo, Pisces moons are just so sweet. I don’t know how else to start, they literally are the sweetest people and give off this mystical type of aura. They’re very otherworldly. Also, these people daydream 24/7. They put Aquarius moons to shame in daydreaming. This girl I like is a Pisces moon and I always catch her daydreaming LMAO. They’re also extremely sensitive too and feel things so deeply. They try to hide how they feel from people, but you can see it in their eyes. I can always tell when my Pisces moon friend is upset just by the look in her eyes. They also tend to be introverted and it takes a while for them to warm up to someone. My co-worker is a Pisces moon and it took 2 weeks for her to finally start talking to me LMAO. They also have really vivid and wild dreams too. I feel like my Pisces moon friend is always telling me about some wild dream they had like that they were in a castle or in an ocean. They also can be really moody, they can be fine one second and then get really sad out of nowhere. Their emotions are like the ocean. I feel like another downside of Pisces Moons are that they can be very manipulative however this is really with any underdeveloped water moon/sun placement. I also feel like they tend to be escapists a lot. They don’t like to deal with reality a lot, and they see the best in everything and everyone even if it’s to their demise. They’re also super friendly and are nice to everyone they meet, even if they’re reserved they’re still very sweet. They’re also extremely creative too, I feel like every Pisces moon I’ve ever met has some sort of creative hobby. My co-worker who’s a Pisces moon is working on becoming a photographer and her stuff is AMAZING. I think that’s because they see the best in the world and the beauty in everything; and they know how to show that in their work so others can see the world like they do. They’re also super empathetic and are really good listeners. You can talk to them about anything and feel understood. :) 

So this wraps up my moon sign series! I hope you guys liked it! Again, don’t take offense these are just my opinions on each moon sign! Hope you guys enjoyed, and if you don’t see your moon sign here it’s likely in part one. 

#libra moon #scorpio moon #sagittarius moon #capricorn moon #aquarius moon #pisces moon #astrology #astro #astrology observations #astrology notes #astro observations #astro notes #astro tumblr #astrology tumblr #astroworld #astrology world #astro shelf #astrology shelf #astrology tidbits #astro tidbits #astrology questions #astrology question #astrooo #zodiac #zodiac signs #zodiac tumblr

[imagine-a-life-like-this]

Stalker (Ending A) (L.MH)

Warnings : swearing, mentions of one night stands, partying, alcohol

Word Count : 6210

Synopsis : he saw her everywhere he was, so the only logical conclusion is that she’s stalking him. he finally had enough and confronted her, but she had no idea who hyunjin was. he refused to listen to her until lee minho came to her rescue, effectively shutting hyunjin up. it was a small lie that made him face feelings he didn’t expect, and began a love triangle no one thought possible. but little did they know, she only had eyes for her best friend.

Author’s Note : i’m back! and while i was gone, i wrote a lot of new imagines. figured i’d start posting again, starting with this hyunjin/minho imagine. hyunjin’s ending will be up tomorrow!

He had never seen her before, but suddenly she was everywhere. Every party, every café, absolutely everywhere, and Hyunjin couldn’t help but think she was stalking him. What other explanation could there be to her being at every place she was at?

At first, he thought it was adorable. He saw her as an adoring fan just working up the courage to talk to him. But when he spotted her across the room with her phone up, seemingly taking pictures of her, he had enough. He stormed over to her, slamming his half full cup on a nearby table before grabbing her phone from her hands, causing her to look up at him with a look of annoyance. “Give it back.”

“Stop taking pictures of me! Stop stalking me! I’m tired of seeing your face everywhere.” He yelled, holding her phone up in the air so she couldn’t reach it. She crossed her arms across her chest as her brows furrowed together, confused as to why this stranger would think she was following him.

“There’s got to be a misunderstanding.” She tried to explain, but he interrupted her, telling her not to make excuses, saying he had caught her red-handed taking pictures of him. “Look at my phone, dude.” He brought it closer to her face, seeing that the camera was not open, but a text conversation was, the last text sent asking where this person was.

Before either one of them could say anything else, someone draped their arm across her shoulders, causing both of them to meet the eyes of Lee Minho, leader of the dance team. “Is there an issue?” Minho asked, pulling the girl closer to his body. She was too much in shock at the situation to push herself away from him.

“Yes. This girl is stalking me!” Hyunjin exclaimed, earning an eye roll from the girl tucked into Minho’s side.

“You mean my girlfriend?” The crowd that was beginning to gather gasped at the new information, whispers quickly erupting from the crowd. “I can assure you she isn’t stalking you, Hyunjin. Babe, are you stalking Hyunjin?” His attention moved from Hyunjin to the girl he claimed was his girlfriend.

“I don’t even know who he is if I’m honest.” She shrugged, looking from Minho to Hyunjin, who now seemed embarrassed by the amount of people surrounding them. “Can I have my phone back now?” Hyunjin slowly slid the phone into her open hand, quietly apologizing to the mystery girl, the girl apparently dating Minho, a man he looks up to. “You didn’t have to do that.” She told Minho after Hyunjin walked away and the crowd dispersed, enjoying the party.

“Hyunjin’s a dick, he deserved to be put in his place. He thinks he’s all that and that girls fall at his feet; this was a well-deserved reality check.” Minho smiled. “I’m guessing you were looking for a friend?” She nodded, looking to see if Jisung had responded to her text to no avail.

“Looks like he’s probably wrapped up with something else.” She mumbled hoping Minho wouldn’t hear, but he did.

“Looks like I’m your company for the night.” He smiled as he pulled her towards the kitchen where the drinks were laid out on the counter. “Pick your poison.” He joked. His smile was intoxicating to her, almost addictive and she didn’t want to look away. She had heard of the infamous dance team leader, Lee Minho, but their paths never crossed before tonight. And she could see why he was so popular.

He was handsome in a way she’d never seen before. He looked like the kind of guy that was cold and aloof, but when he smiled at her, her heart felt safe. Like she could share her deepest secrets with him, and he would take them to the grave, not uttering a word of them to anyone.

She was addicted to the scent wafting off of him into her nose, a very natural and clean scent, different than other guys with their overwhelming cologne. As the two talked the whole night, she found herself not wanting to leave, now understanding how all the girls easily fall for his charms.

He was notorious around the university for being charming without even trying; girls flocking towards him, but he either doesn’t notice or doesn’t care. But he was standing in front of her, all of his attention on her, his eyes not leaving her, not even when people around them were calling his name. He was intrigued by this girl he had never seen before and wanted to learn more.

Minho wanted to learn everything about this mystery girl, but he didn’t know why. He wanted to learn her likes and dislikes. Her pet peeves and things she does when she feels stressed. Does she have any pets? What are her parents like? What’s her major? There were so many things to learn, but a party didn’t seem like the right place to ask hard hitting questions. He wanted to spend as long as he could in her presence, learning about her, but even eternity didn’t seem like long enough.

He wasn’t sure what came over him; no other girl ever made him feel like this. None of his ex-girlfriends made him this curious. Was it the way she didn’t fall at Hyunjin’s feet like every other girl at this school? Maybe it was the way she laughed at all his jokes, even the bad ones. The way her lips upturned as her smiled widened before her mouth opened, letting out a laugh that Minho could listen to for years and not get tired of.

She was confident in the way she carried herself, but not in a cocky way. She held eye contact as they spoke, not shying away when he complimented her. It was like she knew she was beautiful and didn’t need anyone to tell her. His heart was pounding in his chest, but he pretended it wasn’t and tried to hold conversation as normal. Is this what the people call love at first sight?

Before either of them knew it, the music was turned off. The house that was once filled with people, was near empty as a few drunk stragglers stayed behind, waiting for someone to help them home. “Oh wow, is it 4 in the morning already?” Minho asked, looking down at his phone that was apparently blowing up the entire time he was with Y/N, and he had no idea. He was so entranced by her beauty he didn’t feel the vibrations coming from his pocket. “Let me take you home.” She quickly agreed, loving the idea of spending more time with him. He placed his hand on her lower back as he led her out of the house and to his car parked down the street.

The two made conversation the entire drive, they didn’t even realize there was no music playing. Not even a second of silence was shared between them as their connection seemed to grow stronger. “Thank you.” She told him as they pulled up to her apartment building.

“Can I get your number? I’d really like to see you again.” She smiled, holding out her hand for his phone that he happily handed over.

“I suppose it’s the least I could do seeing as we’re apparently dating.” For what seemed like the millionth time that night, a blush crept up onto his cheeks as he took his phone back. “I hope to see you soon, Minho.” With that, she left his car and headed up to her apartment.

Had her heart not already belonged to her best friend, Han Jisung, she would have kissed him. She was hardly ever one to sit idly by and allow her feelings to go unsaid, except when it came to Han Jisung, school playboy.

Just as Minho was notorious, Jisung was as well. Jisung was a womanizer, and he loved it. Y/N was there whenever he needed help getting away from a one-night stand who wanted more. In fact, that’s why she was everywhere Hyunjin seemed to be. Jisung would invite her to parties he was invited to so she was close in case he needed her. He would call her to cafes he invited the women to if they weren’t gone when he woke up, seemingly as a nice gesture. But Y/N would be there to act like the jealous, angry girlfriend, either scaring off the girl or dragging Jisung out and effectively getting him away.

If Hyunjin paid more attention, he would see that she never noticed him. Her eyes were trained on the door, looking for the one man that gave her butterflies. He would notice the tears in her eyes as she once again acted like a girlfriend catching her boyfriend cheating. He would see how her face lit up when Jisung’s attention was trained on her instead of someone else. How her cheeks would turn a pretty pink colour when he would wrap his arms around her. If Hyunjin just paid a little more attention, he would see that she only ever had eyes for Han Jisung.

She woke up the next morning when her phone rang with Jisung’s familiar ringtone. “Regular café.” Was all he said before he hung up. She begrudgingly got herself out of bed, throwing on a simple outfit and making herself look presentable. If only her heart didn’t belong to Han Jisung, maybe she could tell him no.

She sat at her regular table, looking at her phone and glancing at the door every time the bell above it chimed. Tears pricked her eyes when Jisung walked in, his arm draped across the beautiful girls shoulders, his famous smile dancing across his lips. She watched from her spot as they got into the growing lineup, talking about something. She was so focused on the two of them, she didn’t notice her phone going off in her hands until it was too late and the call went to voicemail.

She waited until Jisung and the girl sat at a table before making her move. She stormed over to their table, her iced coffee in hand. Jisung’s eyes widened when he saw her, playing the part of a boyfriend just caught cheating. “Who are you?” She asked, allowing her voice to crack just enough to make her seem heartbroken. The girl looked between her and Jisung, confused as to what was going on. “I’m asking who you are! What are you doing with my boyfriend?” She tried to keep her voice low and even, not wanting to disturb other peoples day with her fake drama.

“Oh my god, I had no idea!” The girls eyes widened as she stood from the table, her hands up in surrender. “I swear I thought he was single. Jisung, you need to treat your girlfriend better!” She turned her attention to the man at the table. “I’m so sorry. You deserve better.” With that, the girl took her leave, allowing Y/N to sit at the table and Jisung to relax.

“You’re seriously the best friend ever.” She was silent as she nodded, staring at the text on her phone from Minho. “So I heard you’re dating Minho? Think he’d be okay that you act like my girlfriend sometimes?” Jisung chuckled, trying to lighten the sour mood.

“I’m not a huge fan.” Jisung spun around in his chair, his eyes meeting Minho’s. She smiled when she saw him, ushering him to join them.

“It’s nothing major, dude. She just says she’s my girlfriend to shake off one-night stands that want more. You know how it is.” Jisung shrugged, taking a sip of his coffee.

“No, I don’t know how it is.” Minho’s eyes narrowed as he looked at Jisung, not liking this guy one bit. He hated this guy more than he disliked Hyunjin. Minho had never met a more appalling human being. He could see the heartbreak written all over her face, knowing her feelings for Jisung were more than platonic. Jisung had this beautiful, kind-hearted girl right in front of him, ready to give him the world, and he treated her like trash. Yet she stayed by his side, bending to his every whim. “Hope you don’t mind if I steal her for the rest of the day though. We have plans.” She happily stood from the table and followed Minho outside, not even waiting for Jisung’s answer.

He wanted to get her out of there, away from the man who seemed to break her heart more and more everyday. “Looks like you’re my knight in shining armour once again.” She smiled as the two fell into a similar rhythm as they walked beside each other. He didn’t want to be her knight in shining armour, he wanted to be her prince. He wanted to be the one that made her excited for the day ahead. “How can I repay you?” Silence fell over them when she asked that question. Minho stopped dead in his tracks and grabbed her hand, pulling her close to him.

“Date me.” He said. “Pretend to be my girlfriend for three months to make it believable. I’ll help you get over Han Jisung.” She didn’t even question how he knew, knowing they had a connection that was undeniable ever since they met last night.

“What would you get out of it?” She giggled, wondering why a man who was still practically a stranger would want to help her with a task that seemed impossible.

“I’d get to bring you to the dance studio to annoy Hyunjin.” He made up a lie on the spot, knowing that just getting to call her his girlfriend would be enough for him. The satisfaction of helping her heal her heart would absolutely be enough for him.

She didn’t even have to think about it and agreed almost immediately. Maybe Minho is exactly what she needs to move passed these unrequited feelings she’s had since high school.

They just stood there, staring into each other’s eyes, absolutely entranced by the other’s beauty, and without realizing it, they both were leaning in. Their lips met in the middle in a feverish kiss filled with passion and lust. He put everything he could in the kiss, hoping to silently show her his true feelings. She melted into the kiss, knowing now for certain that Lee Minho is exactly what she needed.

As promised, Minho invited her to the dance studio a few days later. She decided to pick up food on the way, knowing everyone would be hungry after practice. She made her way through the maze of dance studios in the performing arts building, bags of food in her hands and an excited smile on her face. Quietly, she opened the door, Minho immediately noticing her and stopping whatever he was doing. The other dancers turned to see what caught their leaders attention. Hyunjin rolled his eyes when he saw her, annoyed that she was officially showing up absolutely everywhere he went, the dance studio no longer an escape.

Minho walked towards her, taking the bags from her hands, and pressing a quick kiss to her lips and ushering her to the front of the room where he was standing previously. “Let’s take a quick break to eat the food my girlfriend brought for us.”  

They all sat in a circle, joking, and eating. Minho could barely keep his eyes off of her. She would meet his eyes every so often, only looking away to give attention to whoever was talking.

But if they paid closer attention, they would notice another set of eyes that couldn’t seem to look away from her. Hyunjin wondered what seemed different about her today that seemed to draw him in so much. Maybe it was the obvious kindness she possessed, buying the entire team food without ever meeting them before. Maybe it was the way she seemed to glow unlike the dull lifelessness she showed the other times he noticed her. Her smile was wide and her eyes seemed to sparkle, as if someone put stars in her eyes. She possessed a beauty he hadn’t noticed before, and he could feel the jealousy build in his chest every time she looked at Minho the way he wanted her to look at him.

Hyunjin found himself wanting to get closer to her, but he did his best to hide it. He laughed at the stories she told them, their eyes meeting for a brief second each time. And when the food was eaten and it was time to go over the routine one more time, he found himself putting his all into impressing her. Minho was the leader, but Hyunjin wanted to be the center of attention, the center of her attention.

She was amazed at the beautiful choreography that Minho put together, but her eyes seemed to drift towards Hyunjin. He seemed completely entranced in the music and his body moved as if it was a liquid. It was impossible to look away from Hyunjin when he danced; he looked so ethereal and she could finally see why so many girls begged for his attention. She would too had her heart not belonged to Jisung.

“Amazing.” She exclaimed with a wide smile, and Minho wrapped his arms around her, pressing a kiss to her forehead. Hyunjin wished that was him. He watched from afar as she went on and on about the choreography, saying that Minho did such a great job. “Everyone did incredible!” She clapped her hands together, everyone’s attention now on her as they thanked her for not only her kind words, but the food she brought earlier.

“I hope she comes around more! I like her company, hyung.” Another one of the members, Felix, exclaimed with a smile that seemed to mirror hers.

“If no one minds, I’m sure she’ll come to more practices.” Minho beamed; his arm now draped across her shoulders. Flashbacks of the party came to Hyunjin’s mind, and he felt embarrassed all over again.

She snuck away from Minho while he was caught up in a conversation with a couple of the guys from the team. “You were really amazing, Hyunjin.” He was slightly startled when he heard her voice. “You looked absolutely ethereal and so in your element, it was hard to look away.” She admitted, her eyes not leaving his. He saw the confidence she carried herself with that made Minho fall for her so easily.

“Thank you.” His gratitude was sincere, and she could tell by the way his cheeks burned red. “I’m really sorry about what I said at the party.” She shook her head.

“The past is the past, don’t worry about it.” He could see why she was the girl Minho let his guard down too. She was the kind of girl you don’t encounter twice in a lifetime. She was the kind of girl you hold on to and hope she doesn’t let go. Hyunjin could tell families must adore her and wish for her as a daughter-in-law. And he wondered once again how he had never seen her before. She was the kind of girl that stood out in a crowd, not because she was the most beautiful, but because she had a glow to her that seemed to have a magnetic pull.

“I’ll see you around.” He didn’t want to walk away, but he would do something he would regret if he didn’t. Hyunjin wasn’t a homewrecker, even if it meant losing the perfect girl.

“Ready to go?” Minho asked as Hyunjin walked away. She smiled up at him, nodding. If he could, Minho would buy the world and gift it to her, that’s how much he had fallen for her in such a short amount of time.

Once again she found herself sitting at her regular table at the regular café, her eyes trained on the door, waiting for Jisung to walk through with whatever girl he was with this time. She didn’t feel as heartbroken as she did before, this last month with Minho helping more than she thought possible. Honestly, she felt more annoyed than anything. It was like Jisung didn’t call to hang out anymore, only to request her assistance. She wondered where the sweet and loveable Jisung from high school disappeared to, and who this fuckboy was that replaced him.

As she waited, she didn’t notice Hyunjin watching her from afar, wondering who she was waiting for with such an angry look on her face. He could see her biting her lip as her leg bounced, and he knew it wasn’t Minho. She was never anxious like this around Minho. He seemed to bring out the best in her. He noticed her glow was once again dull, and his curiosity was growing as each second passed.

When the bell chimed and her leg stopped bouncing, he looked towards the door to see the infamous Han Jisung. Was she waiting for him? What was her business with the fuckboy of campus? He watched as she watched Jisung sit down across from another girl, and she stood to make her way to him. Hyunjin stood as well, grabbing her by the wrist before she could approach the table Jisung sat at. “What are you doing?” He asked, concern in his eyes.

“Something I always do.” She replied, snatching her wrist back and approaching Jisung. Hyunjin watched from afar, ready to jump in if anything were to go wrong.

Since the campus knew of her and Minho’s relationship, she had to take a new approach: the annoying best friend. “Who’s this?” The girl asked as Y/N took a seat beside Jisung, Jisung immediately wrapping his arms around her.

“My best friend. You don’t mind if she joins us, right?” Of course the girl agreed, not wanting Jisung to have a bad impression of her, in hopes she could be the girl that changes him.

It only took 10 minutes of the two of them completely ignoring her, talking, and laughing with each other as if she wasn’t even there, for her to leave. “You’re the best.” Jisung said as he usually did. “I’ve missed you.” Her heart no longer fluttered at his words.

“I tried calling, you never picked up.” Jisung’s heart broke at the obvious distance she was putting between them. He knew it was his fault. He was pushing her away, hoping his growing feelings would disappear, but they only seemed to grow stronger. None of these girls seemed to compare to the girl he had right in front of him all this time, and he hates that it took him so long to realize that. He hates that another man noticed it before he did and she slipped through his fingers before he even realized she was leaving.

“I’ll be better, I promise. You’re my best friend, I can’t lose you.” She nodded. From his spot, Hyunjin could tell she wanted to disappear and he decided to give her an out.

“Hey Y/N, you coming to practice today?” She met Hyunjin’s eyes, and the sparkle he was used to seeing seemed to reappear in an instant, causing butterflies to erupt in his stomach.

“Of course!” She exclaimed with her heart-stopping smile, and Hyunjin could see the anger and jealousy bubbling up in Jisung.

“Want to grab something to eat from the diner from last time before practice?” She slung her purse over her shoulder and stood from the table, agreeing with the notion of food.

“You don’t need anything else from me, right Sungie?” The nickname she gave to him in high school rolled off her tongue before she could stop it. Little did she know the effect that simple name had on Jisung.

“Nope, go have fun. I’ll call you later.” Jealously bubbled inside Jisung as he watched her walk away with Hyunjin, his arm draped across her shoulders. He put distance between the two of them, and she seemed to replace him. They used to spend all day together and never get bored; their stomachs aching from all the laughter. Everything seemed to change overnight, and she was really slipping through his fingers.

“Usually Minho is the one to save me.” She joked as her and Hyunjin walked towards the diner the two of them went to the previous week. Ever since that first practice she attended, the two of them grew closer and she seemed to spend more time with him than Minho.

“How do you even know Han Jisung?” Hyunjin asked, the curiosity eating at him. She smiled at the memories of her and Jisung in high school. Back when she thought there was a possibility of her feelings being reciprocated, but when they got to university, Jisung seemed to do a compete 180 and became a different person.

“We met in high school and immediately became best friends. He wasn’t always like this.” Without prompting, she delved into the memories with Jisung. How he used to be really introverted and nervous around girls. How he was the kind of guy to show up at her house in the middle of night because she was sad. How he was the kind of guy to remember all the small details and surprise her with gifts that were absolutely perfect. He knew her better than she knew herself, and that’s why she fell for him. That’s why she bent over backwards for him.

Until Minho came along and showed her she deserved more. She deserved the kind of guy Jisung used to be, the kind of guy Minho is. She deserved someone who looks at her like she put the stars in the sky and was the reason the sun rose in the morning. She deserved someone who could see her radiance, someone who saw passed her outward beauty and saw the beauty she held within. Someone like Minho. Someone like Hyunjin.

Without realizing it, both Minho and Hyunjin fell for her. Without realizing it, she got over her feelings for Jisung, and began to fall for the two handsome men by her side. A love triangle no one expected.

As the 3-month mark inched closer, Minho felt nervous. He fell harder for her than he originally thought possible and didn’t want to let her go. He could already feel her slipping through his fingers as she spent nearly everyday with Hyunjin. The two of them got close seemingly overnight, and Minho could feel himself on the verge of exploding in anger and jealousy every time he saw them together.

She seemed to smile more and laugh louder with Hyunjin than she ever did with him. The man who claimed he didn’t like skin ship, the man who barely hugged his friends, was the same man who seemed to always be touching her in some way. His arm draped across her shoulders, his arms wrapped around her waist, his arm resting on her leg when they sat beside each other. And she didn’t seem to mind. She seemed to revel in the fact that Hyunjin’s attention was solely on her, barely noticing that she’s the only girl Minho has looked at since the party.

The 3-month mark inched closer with each passing second, and she found herself hoping it would never end. Where would her and Minho stand after this? Would he stay by her side or abandon her saying he did what he told her he would?

A part of her wanted to tell Minho she wanted to continue being with him, that she didn’t want to lose everything they built over these last couple months. But another part of her was also falling for Hyunjin. He was nothing like the man that confronted her at the party. He wasn’t the man in the rumours she was always hearing. Hwang Hyunjin was so much more.

She thought getting over Jisung would make her life easier. She could stick by his side and pretend like she never wished for anything more than friendship. She could watch him be a fuckboy and maybe one day fall in love without feeling the hurt in her chest. Little did she know the price of moving on was the confusion of falling for 2 men at the exact same time. But she fell for them for different reasons.

Lee Minho was very driven; completely focused on accomplishing his dreams. She thought he was the most handsome as he came up with new choreography. He was so focused on making it flow together and easy for the other follow along that he would barely notice her make her way into the studio, watching from afar as he moved to the music, completely immersed.

But when he would finally notice her, he would smile at her, his cold exterior completely shattering as he pulls her in for a hug, kissing the top of her head. He would ask for her opinion on his new dance, truly interested in what she thought despite her not being a dancer. Her opinion meant more to him than any others.

She loved watching him lead the dance team, helping them when he noticed them struggling, and beaming when they would nail the new choreography as if he was a proud father. She loved that he wasn’t afraid to show them how much he loved her, regardless of their relationship being fake. He would hold her and kiss her in front of the members and it gave her butterflies every single time.

But when it’s just the two of them and he’s open and vulnerable, that’s what she loves the most. His head in her lap as she plays with his hair while he talks about his dreams and his fears. She listens carefully, hanging onto his every word and reassuring him best she can. Little does she know; her words help him more than he would ever admit.

She fell for him with every kiss, every touch, every late night spent talking. He was only meant to help her get over her feelings for Jisung, and he did more than that without even realizing it.

And then there was Hwang Hyunjin; a man she never thought she would fall for. She didn’t want to be just another girl falling at his feet. She didn’t want to be just another fan standing in the crowd hoping he would look her way even once. But along the way, she couldn’t help but fall for him.

Just like Minho, Hyunjin was quite driven and focused on accomplishing his dreams. Dance was his passion and she could tell he was completely in his element while on the dance floor. He could take any choreography that Minho gave him and nail it almost immediately, looking absolutely ethereal while doing it.

But he was the most handsome behind the camera. Photography was a hobby she found out he had when she brought him along for a photography walk. He was beaming when she met up with him, his own camera around his neck, ready to snap pictures. The way his face would change from smiley to completely focused made her heart flutter in ways Minho couldn’t.

She felt comfortable with Hyunjin, able to open up to him about things she couldn’t even tell Jisung. Hyunjin was at her door anytime if she called. He was there to take her for late night drives when she just needed to think with no distractions. He would play her favourite songs and only speak when she pulled herself out of her thoughts.

Hyunjin was her personal hype man, getting excited even over little victories. When she aced her photography exam, he took her out to celebrate. When her assignment was chosen to compete for the school in the photography competition, his cheers were the loudest. When that same assignment won first place, shocking her into silence, he was the one pushing her towards the stage to accept her award, cheering and clapping even though everyone else was silent.

She fell for him during the silent drives when her head felt like it was about to explode, during the photography walks where she would catch him taking pictures of her instead of the scenery.

Minho gave her butterflies and made her realize she deserved so much more than Jisung was giving her. And Hyunjin made her feel calm and was by her side hyping her up for absolutely everything. They made her feel different things, and that’s why it felt near impossible to choose, but she knew she had to. But there was one thing she didn’t think of; did they even return her feelings?

“What do you do when you fall for 2 people at the same time?” She wondered out loud, Jisung sprawled out on her couch. He stared at her, studying the exhaustion on her face, this question obviously keeping her from sleeping properly.

He kept his promise of doing better, of being a better friend to her. He was tired of the distance between them, and even if she would never return his growing feelings, he wanted his best friend back. “You choose the one that makes you the happiest.” He answered simply before tossing another piece of popcorn in his mouth. “Choose the one you want to call when you get good news, and when you get bad news.” He continued, and the gears in her head were working double time. “Choose the one you feel most comfortable with, the one who makes you excited for the days ahead. Choose the one that all the love songs in the world seem to be about. The one you can see yourself dancing in the rain with. The one you can scream at during a petty argument, but in the same breath say you love them.” Jisung continued to name things and he did he realized he had always been in love with her.

She was the one he wanted to wake up to in the morning, kissing her before getting ready for the day. She was the one he always called when something happened, good or bad, and she was always there. The meaningless, cheesy love songs seemed to all be about her. He was immediately drawn to her in high school because she was his soulmate. But as he watched her ponder his words, he realized that he wasn’t hers. There was another man out there better than he ever could be. Another man that would make her happier than he ever could. And though he could feel his heart break, he would support her love if it brought back her earth-shatteringly beautiful smile.

One name came to mind for her when she thought over all of Jisung’s words. The man that came to mind when a love song played. The man that she wanted to share everything with; all the good news and the bad news. There was only one man she didn’t want to watch fall in love with someone else. And before she could chicken out, she ran out of her apartment, leaving Jisung on her couch, watching her run towards the love of her life.

       She knew exactly where to find him even at this late hour. She ran through the confusing maze of dance studios, determined to hold onto Lee Minho for as long as he will let her. She barged into the familiar dance studio; the same one she’s been going to almost every day to watch her fake boyfriend lead the dance team to success. But was the relationship ever fake?

Minho stopped mid routine when he heard the door slam open, confused as to who would bother him at such a late hour, especially with finals just around the corner. But when he saw her face, he didn’t care. He didn’t care that he couldn’t nail this one move that would complete his routine.

“I don’t want to break up.” She spat out from the other side of the room, her voice echoing around them. “I don’t want this to end. I don’t want to wake up tomorrow and not be able to kiss you. I don’t want to watch you fall in love with someone who isn’t me.” She kept rambling, wanting all of her thoughts out in the open. She didn’t even notice him walking towards her with the same amount of determination on his face.

He didn’t let her finish her ramblings before pressing his lips to hers like had done many times before, but this time neither one of them held back. This kiss was filled with so much more passion and love than all the others in the past. This was the kind of kiss that took your breath away and had you begging for more. “Silly girl.” He smiled as he pulled away, pressing his forehead against hers. “There is no other girl for me. It was always going to be you.” She pressed her lips to his once more, the words I love you on the tip of her tongue, but they didn’t need to be said out loud for him to hear them. He heard them loud and clear.

#stray kids imagine #skz imagine #skz x reader #stray kids x reader #lee minho #lee minho imagine #lee minho x reader #lee minho au #hwang hyunjin #hwang hyunjin imagine #han jisung #lee felix #kim seungmin #yang jeongin #bang chan #seo changbin

[yannowhatigiveup]

A Blinded Kiss

I haven’t posted anything recently so I dug around in my WIPs to see if anything was even worth posting and I found this that I made a while ago. It certainly isn’t the best but it isn’t the worst out of all my other WIPs.

"Is this really necessary?" The bluenette asked, eyeing a blindfold given by her brotherly figure.

"Of course it is Pixie!" An older man with two-toned hair replied, way too over enthusiastic about the whole situation. "It's a great way to find your way around the manor”

"And it's a great family bonding experience too!" Another man in the room replied, even more enthusiastic than the first.

"Fine, I'll do it Jay" the blue-eyed girl huffed, twirling the blindfold between her fingers. "What are the rules again, Dick?"

Dick beamed at the girl before answering. "Well Mari, it's simple. Put the blindfold on, count to fifty, spin around and try to steal a hug from anyone in the manor"

"So I have to walk around the manor blindfolded and try to sneak up on you? You know that's impossible!" Marinette exclaimed, she would not go around the house looking like a touch-starved fool.

"That's exactly why we're doing it" Jason replied, shrugging his shoulders. "It'll last a long time."

After a few seconds, the blue-eyed girl sighed, giving in to both Jason and Dick. "Fine, if that's what makes you happy" Marinette wrapped the matte-black fabric tightly around her eyes, already struggling within the first few seconds. She began counting and she heard the two scuffling away, smiling while being able to tell which direction they went in. In the mean time, Marinette debated her options.

'Both Jason and Dick would be the ideal choices but they'll be able to hear me from a mile away. Tim would be the most logical one since he's half asleep, but where does he even go in this maze? God knows where Alfred is, Mr Wayne is scary. Damian-' She paused her train of thoughts, granted Marinette had only met him a few days ago but that didn't stop the crush she had heavily try to cease. 'He'd probably hear me from a mile away as well. This game is so unfair'

Soon enough, Marinette reached fifty and spun herself around, she used a bit too much force than needed so now not only was she blinded but she lost her sense of direction. Giving herself a minute to recover, the bluenette began to walk. Using her improved senses, thanks to the miraculous, Mari was slowly able to create a theoretical map in her mind, though it did take much more energy than she desired.

"Fighting an akuma is easier than this" The bluenette muttered as she hit her thigh along the corner of a wall.

Even though she was using her enhanced abilities, she'd pump into a corner or a wall every now and again, the amount of times increased when her energy was being used. After wondering a hall for what seemed like hours, the bluenette came to a staircase, one that she ever so carefully used to get to a higher floor. Once she did, she kept a hand on one of the walls, using it as a guide. Soon enough, her hand came to what felt like a doorframe. The door was closed she could tell but it was recent used due to the fact that the doorknob was warm. Making sure not to intrude, she knocked on said door, she almost missed the muffled 'come in' had she not been paying attention. Marinette opened the door, went in and quickly shut it behind her, taking a deep breath.

"Okay I hope you don't mind but which room is this and whose in the room? Dick and Jason thought it would be a good idea to walk around the manor blindfolded while trying to sneak up on them" The bluenette huffed, only to freeze when she heard a familiar chuckle.

"I've heard, you're in my room, It's Damian just to clarify" 'Sh-' "So, what task must be fulfilled to give you permission to take the blindfold off? I doubt you want to keep it on any longer" Marinette giggled.

"You're right, I would probably get lost of I continue. Um, I have to 'steal a hug' apparently"

"So you have to hug someone without them inspecting it" Damian came to that conclusion to which the bluenette nodded her head.

"Yeah that's basically it, hey do you have anywhere I could sit down? I'm getting tired..."

"Of course, my bed is five steps to your front and two steps to your right, make yourself comfortable" She wasn't sure how red she had gotten but she obliged anyway. Had she not been wearing the blindfold, she would've seen Damian smiling at her flustered state. Giving herself a moment to regain her energy, Marinette turned to where she presumed Damian was working at his desk. "Can I hug you? Jay never said I couldn't ask the person first. I-I won't if you don't want me to! I just wanted to ask so..."

She heard the boy thoughtfully hum before he made his way over to her. From what she could tell, Damian was now in front of Marinette, looming over her.

"Did Todd or Grayson say it had to be a hug?" Marinette tilted her head in confusion and thoughtfulness, that had never crossed her mind before.

"W-"

"What happens if I kiss you instead?"

The bluenette didn’t reply with words as she knew how terrible her words would be in her flustered state. But she wanted this, her heart longed for it in a way it never did for anyone else. Instead, she nodded, giving the green-eyed boy permission to do as he wished.

She felt his hand lightly tilt her chin up towards, where she presumed, his face was. Then he pressed his lips onto hers, his other had behind her head, tugging at the fabric around her eyes. Marinette felt bliss, she was glad that no one else would interrupt this moment. Shivers went down her spine as she felt Damian’s hands travel up from behind her neck and to wear the blindfold was knotted, gently tugging at the binding. She was glad that when her face was free from the fabric that comprised her vision, the first thing in her line of eyesight were Damian's deep emerald eyes, the shimmered the same way they had when she first laid eyes on him, she'd been enraptured ever since. The boy, however, was smirking as he noticed the pink that dusted her face. Without a moment passing, she threw herself the green-eyed boy, delivering a hug. As she pulled away, her hands cupped his face and she returned his embrace with one of her own. When she pulled away once more, she smiled in satisfaction at his flustered expression.

"When did you realise you had feelings for me?" Marinette asked softly, her forehead pressed against his trying to regain her breath.

"That's a very easy question" Damian stared lovingly into her eyes. "I fell the moment I saw you take down that Akuma three times your size" Her eyes widened.

"You know about me being Ladybug?"

"The same way you know I'm Robin"

They both smiled, creating a truce to not reveal anything.

"Well I better get going, see you later." She got up from the bed and opened the door, only to turn around and say "Je t'aime mon cœur" before exiting the room, leaving a blushing Damian.

Marinette walked back down the stairs, the piece of cloth in hand and small love-struck smile on her face. When she entered the main living room, she came face to face with the owner of the manor.

"Oh hello Mr Wayne"

"Hello Marinette, I see you managed to get the blindfold off" The older man gestured towards the piece of fabric in her hand. "And please, do call me Bruce. Who did you end up surprising with a hug then?"

She smiled brightly before replying. "Damian"

His usual formal demeanor broke for a moment but Bruce quickly picked the pieces back up. "He didn't attack you or injure you in any shape or form?"

Marinette decided to play the oblivious little girl. "No..? Why, does he do it often?" Her head titled in confusion.

"Nothing it doesn't matter" Bruce simply sighed and shook his head. "Also, there's something I'd like to discuss with you at dinner, if you don't mind"

"No not at all, I'll see you at dinner then?" Bruce nodded and left, leaving Marinette alone in the room, waiting for her honorary older brother and his brother to come in. Which they did but only after some time, it was hilarious to see them crouched down, talking to each other in hushed voices. They flinched as she cleared her throat, both slowly turning towards the sound to find a smug looking Marinette and a blindfold whipped around her finger.

"I win"

~~~

Most of the occupants at the table were either in an all out war or were about to be, except for Marinette and an exasperated Bruce Wayne.

"So Marinette" The eldest Wayne began, silencing the rest of the table. "I hope you don't mind me asking but when you were off searching for Jason, you mentioned attacks that have been occurring in Paris, is this true?"

No one failed to notice the girl flinch. "Yeah it's true"

"...how bad are the attacks? In your opinion"

"Well it depends on how strong the person's emotions are really. If their emotions are strong, then the Akuma is strong too"

"What's the strongest akuma that Paris has seen?" It was Tim who asked and memories of the event began swimming through her mind, she got rid of them with a shake of her head.

"The deadliest akuma Paris has experienced was an akuma called 'Syren'. She's a regular person but, as an akuma, she managed to kill around 2 million people. But don't worry! Ladybug's cure managed to bring them back to life"

"D-did... did you die, Pixie?" Jason asked, his anger mixed with worry was boiling over and luckily simmered after seeing her shake her head.

"Do you think the heroes of Paris would let heroes from the Justice League come over to help?"

Marinette contemplated for a moment, should she really risk the heroes getting akumatized? "I think they would but I wouldn't know"

Bruce nodded while Jason leaned over the table to talk closer to his honorary little-sister. "Why didn't you tell me sooner?"

"I didn't want to bother you"

"You're not a bother, Pixie" Jason smiled at the bluenette on the other side of the table. "You never are and you never will be"

~~~

Marinette returned to Paris a few days later, in the mean time, Bruce and the rest of the batfam were planning their visit to the City of Love. Soon enough, the vigilantes were boarded on the plane. Their flight to Paris was relatively silent. After a few hours, they landed and the vigilantes waited on the Eiffel Tower, only to find out there was a battle going on. Before they could engage in the fight, they were engulfed with magical ladybugs that seemed to fix anything destroyed. As they were mesmerized by the cure, a certain spotted-heroine wobbly landed on the platform. Batman was first to notice.

"Ladybug" His voice caused the others to turn around. "Thank you for allowing us into your city"

Ladybug nodded, not uttering a single word.

"We were hoping, with your permission of course, that we could help you be rid of Hawkmoth once and for good" Again, Ladybug didn't reply. "Ladybug?"

When the heroine didn't respond, Batman glanced at Nightwing and the rest of his sons, clearly something was wrong. Unexpectedly, Robin took his glove off, approached the Ladybug-themed hero and placed his hand onto her forehead.

"You have a fever" he stated, his hand trailing down her face to cup her cheek. His family all shot him weird looks. She tiredly blinked at the vigilante, recognising him as Robin and allowed herself to fall into his arms, detransforming while doing so, leaving a burning hot Marinette.

"Dami?" He hummed. "Take me home, please..." She drifted off to sleep, comforted in her lover's arms. He glanced at his family, holding the bluenette close.

"Pixie...is Ladybug?" Red Hood's voice was first.

"You didn't know?" Robin's voice mocking confusion, enraging Red Hood that his youngest brother knew something about his sister that he didn't. Even more so that his demon brother was holding said sister,

"We should take her back home" Dick went over to feel the girl's forehead. "She's burning"

"Tikki?" Robin asked and a red creature flew out from one of Mari's pockets, startling most of the people there.

"I'll try to heal her on the way, follow me"

The floating red creature flew down from the Eiffel Tower, Robin and Marinette close behind. After some hesitation, the others followed, they ended up on top of a bakery. One by one, they entered through the trapdoor on the balcony, finding both Damian with his mask off and a weak looking Marinette. Despite her enfeebled state, the bluenette greeted each vigilante, her gaze landed on Jason.

"It's just a fever, I'll be fine"

Jason removed his helmet and ran a hand through his hair before both settled on his hips. "You don't look fine"

"I promise I am" She wasn't convincing, not at all.

"Fine" Jason huffed, he could never truly say no to the girl he viewed as his little sister. "But since when were you two a thing" He pointed at the two, his gaze resting maliciously on Damian.

"It's all thanks to you, you know" Marinette smirked at Jason's confusion. Tim snickered as he seemed to catch on to what she was saying.

"Had you not organized that 'blindfolded game', I doubt we would be together at this moment" Damian supplied the information, clearly unfazed by the burning rage in the eyes of his older brother.

"Baby Bird's all grown up" The eldest Wayne son overdramatized wiping a fake tear, Batman sighed at his two eldest sons while pinching the bridge of his nose.

"Get your fucking hands off her, Demon Brat!" Jason tried to lunge at Damian, only to be stopped by both Dick and Tim. Though his fury only grew when Marinette snuggled closer to the green-eyed boy, both smirked in victory over Jason's horrified appearance.

Marinette was now part of the family in more ways than one. Though they wish they had found out in better circumstances, they would be able to take down Hawkmoth once and for all, side by side, all together. And to think this all happened because of a silly blindfold game.

#daminette #damian x marinette #maribat #maridami #marinette x damian #mlb x dc #ml x dc #big brother jason #this is eh I guess

[jincherie]

sunshine riptide | ot7

—  COMMISSION  —

⊙  — pairing: ot7 x reader ⊙  — genre: hybrid au, fluff, comfort, found family, ac inspired ⊙  — wc: 13.8k+ ⊙  — warnings: oc has an almost/light anxiety attack towards the end. there is no explicitly mentioned trigger and it isn’t dwelled on for long, but better to let u guys know! ⊙  — notes: here it is! it’s soft, and warm, and I hope that it can be something to cheer up a little bit those who aren’t having such a good day. i love u all,  and I hope you like this piece :) to the commissioner, thank you for allowing me to write this and I truly hope it helps you feel even just a little bit better! <3

Moving to this island whose inhabitants are mostly hybrids was a bit of an impulse decision, something you did with empty pockets barely a cent to your name. Thanks to the kindness of the island’s ‘mayor’ you have a place to stay, the last spare room in a sharehouse with seven hybrids, and for three months he will pay your rent in exchange for you to work in his shop until you are back on your feet. It’s a sweet deal, but when you begin to get along better than expected with your housemates and the deadline for your departure looms ever closer, you’re not sure you’re going to be able to make yourself leave when the time comes. 

— posted; 06.09.2020 | masterlist

“So in exchange for three months paid stay on the island while you get back on your feet, you will work part-time at the Rabbits Den three days a week, and man the desk in the Resident Services Building on Sundays. Is that okay to you?”

You nod eagerly, the ordeal seeming too good to be true and something you’re afraid will be retracted if you don’t act with haste. Mr Bang returns your motion with a little less fervour, the same kind look never leaving his face.

“Perfect, it’s settled then! We’re glad to have you with us, y/n.”

Something lifts from your chest in that moment, as though you’d been walking beneath the cover of a lead blanket and it has finally slipped from your shoulders. You feel a little breathless, and you know the grin that slips onto your face is stupidly wide. Embarrassingly, you feel salty pricks at the corner of your eyes.

“Thank you so much,” you say, and you mean it. It hadn’t exactly been a well thought out plan, moving here with nothing to your name but your most basic possessions, but you’d just needed to escape and start anew and this… this had been the first opportunity you’d seen. The best opportunity you’d seen. “Really, thank you.”

“You’re more than welcome, young lady.” Mr Bang’s expression grows even softer, if possible. “This is a place people come to find refuge, and happiness. You’re welcome here.”

You clear your throat, turning your head to the side and pretending that you need to cough so he doesn’t see the tear that slips out. You have a feeling he knows, though, as you turn back and find him smiling at you, floppy rabbit ears framing his round face. He reaches out, patting you on the shoulder.

“Now, lets find you a room for the night. I’ll send word to the house I have in mind and make sure they have it nice and tidy before your arrival tomorrow. Sound good?”

It hits you only now how tired you are, more emotionally exhausted than anything, and nod while allowing him to lead you down the hall. That does sound good, actually. That sounds amazing.

O – O – O

You’d arrived on this island in the early hours of the morning yesterday, the late-night ferry the only one that runs to this island on the outskirts of the archipelago. It’s likely due to the fact that the captain is a nocturnal hybrid, and hence prefers to run his business under the cover of night. You hadn’t been able to sleep on the trip over, so when Mr Bang had shown you to the room he was happy to lend you for the night, despite it being barely ten o’clock in the morning you’d passed out the second your head hit the pillow. It was more of a nap than anything, but you suspect that the events of the past few months all caught up to you at once because you woke only for dinner and then fell asleep once more. Mr Bang offered no judgement, and simply left a note instructing you where the bathroom is and where you could find towels so that you could freshen up once you awoke. He also left you a coffee bun in a container, since you’d missed the afternoon tea he held the day before.

You hadn’t even been on this island a day and already the kindness of one of the residents was almost bringing you to tears.

Due to the fact that you’d slept far too early, you end up waking up at an ungodly hour the next day, the day you are meant to be moving in to the sharehouse that Mr Bang told you about. Laying in the bed, nestled in the warmth of the covers and watching as the suns rays slowly begin to stain the ceiling and the curtains in rich marigold, you do your best to get yourself together. You can breathe easy now, any anxiety you’d felt previous now nothing more than an echo in your chest. You feel refreshed, and not just from the ridiculous amount of sleep you’ve had in the past twenty-four hours. There are of course some nerves pertaining to meeting your new housemates, but it’s manageable. You have faith that everything will turn out well. It’s a good feeling.

Mr Bang is kind enough to offer you breakfast, and likely would have pushed you to stay for lunch had you not shown up down the stairs with your baggage already in tow. So begrudgingly, he allows you to head on your way, informing you that your new housemates knew of your arrival and had endeavoured to tidy up as much as possible. You thought it was a little funny he was telling you that—just how messy is the house usually?—but he simply shook his head with a smile that told you the answer would come soon enough.

The island isn’t big, but it most definitely isn’t small. The sun is warm and the air cool with a tinge of salt and sea trailing along the breeze, and the path you walk along that skirts the beach is peppered with sand and the odd shell. It makes you happier than anticipated, because just being out here makes you feel so free. Mr Bang told you that the house where you will be staying is on the other side of the island, past the little cluster of shops and small businesses and perched at the edge of the sand, backing onto a river that flows into the ocean and skirted on one side by a small cliff.

“It’s their own little alcove,” Mr Bang had snorted, a mixture of fondness and amusement evident on his features. “They get up to more trouble than I can keep track of over there, but they’re good boys.”

Ah, that’s right. You’d almost forgotten; your new housemates are a bunch of boys. You hope that Mr Bang is right about their character and you won’t be living in discomfort for the next three months.

The path wound and curved a bit, following the edge of the island, and before long you were walking through a section of light forestry. You suspected the house would be on the other side, and were in the midst of thinking just what it would look like when a small squeak! catches your attention and you halt, almost dropping your bag.

It’s silent, save for the way the breeze caresses the leaves around you. You peer around, eyes unable to spot anything in the foliage. Did you imagine it? It’s a little early in your stay to be going crazy. Hesitantly, you adjust your grip on your bag and resume your trek.

Squeak! S-squeeeak!

No, you definitely heard that. You freeze, having gotten a better sense of where the sound is coming from now and turning towards a large tree smothered in vines of varying thickness and clinginess. For a moment, you don’t see anything, eyes squinting hard—it’s like one of those I spy books you used to rave about as a kid— and just when you think you might be looking in the wrong place, you catch movement.

There, in a cluster of the vines dangling from one of the tree’s thicker limbs, is a tiny creature, all tangled up and squeaking in distress.

“Oh my goodness,” you drop your bag, immediately moving closer.  “Poor thing—hold on just a second, bub. I’ll get you out. Promise not to bite me?”

The creature offers a squeak and logically you know it isn’t answering your request, but you pretend it is anyway. Carefully stepping over plants and twigs, thanking past you for wearing more practical boots, you reach where the creature is stuck, dangling just below eye level.

The vines it has managed to get all tangled up in aren’t particularly thick, but there are a lot of them, and it has managed to get a few of its limbs stuck in place. Carefully, you snap a few of the more central ones and ease the tiny thing out, getting a better view of it the more you pull from its body. It’s squeaking all the while, though with much less distress and more of an energy that simply feels chatty. It makes you smile.

“There you go,” you murmur, cradling the tiny baby in your palms and cooing, trying to calm the heartbeat and hurried breaths you can feel racing against your skin. You stroke along its back as lightly as you can manage. “Oh, you’re a little sugar glider! You’re so pretty, such a cutie. Look at your markings, wow… so pretty.”

Almost as though it can understand your praise and is basking in it, it flicks its bushy tail and rolls in your palm, like a cat rubbing against something with its cheek except this little glider is doing it with its whole body. It’s awfully friendly, you note. Perhaps much of the wildlife here is more peacefully accustomed to human and hybrid activity.

“Okay, you’re free now. I’ll stop ogling at you and let you go,” you say, holding your hands up to a part of the tree that isn’t covered in vines lest there be a repeat of the earlier situation. The sugar glider merely blinks, eyes still on you, and doesn’t move. Brows drawn in confusion, you move your hands closer to the tree, “Well, aren’t you going to—oh!”

Faster than you can react, the little thing darts from your hands, leaping to your bicep and scurrying up with tiny claws in your shirt to your shoulder. Once at its apparent destination, it rushes to the crook of your neck and makes itself at home, nestling against you and securing itself with its tail partway around the back of your neck and its little paws clutching your shirt edge. You giggle, still in shock and trying not to jostle it off as you fight the ticklish sensation.

“Okay. I guess you can come with me. I’m not sure if you can stay the whole while, but I’m sure it will be okay while I walk.”

So off you go, bending and retrieving your bag carefully so you don’t dislodge your tiny new companion. You’ve seen a bit of sugar gliders, but the way this one is acting is quite peculiar. If it sticks around until you arrive at the house, you’d love to snap a quick picture because it really is so pretty, so cute.

The trip is faster than anticipated, now there is something else to occupy your thoughts. Before you know it you’re out of the forestry and approaching a large, modern three storey building that is probably just a few yards short of a mansion, nestled between the ocean, the river, and a short cliff-face just barely higher than the roof. This is the place for sure.

The little glider seems to perk up, the closer you get, something that surprises you since it was so quiet you thought it was asleep. With a soft noise, it grabs onto your hair with tiny paws and scurries to the top of your head, likely making a mess of it in the process but it’s so cute you can’t bring yourself to mind. At least it will be an interesting first impression.

As you approach the front door, you think you see movement in one of the windows on the ground floor. You almost dismiss it as you reach the eve, until you catch the hurried patter of feet against hardwood from beyond the door.

You barely manage to blink before the door is flying open, a man with raven curls and two fluffy russet ears peeking between the locks presenting you with the biggest grin you have ever seen on anyone’s face. It’s boyish and cute, a direct contrast to the mature, sculpted features of his face.

“Hello!” he says, and you catch sight of a long, fluffy russet tail whipping behind him and betraying his excitement—not that he was doing much to hide it. “You must be the new roomie! It’s nice to meet you! We’ve been waiting all morning, and one of us actually went to pick you up but… I’m not sure where he is.”

You’re a little overwhelmed but easily recover when he simply keeps looking at you so happily, returning the man’s bright smile. There’s rustling in your hair at the back of your head but you ignore it, adjusting your grasp on your bag. “Ah, thank you. I’m y/n, it’s nice to meet you…?”

The man pulls back, a sheepish look on his face that accompanies a light flush in his cheeks. “Oh, right. I’m Taehyung. Sorry. My hyungs tell me I tend to get a bit ahead of myself sometimes.”

You keep the smile on your face. “That’s okay, we got there in the end. It’s nice to meet you, Taehyung.”

Taehyung brightens, tail curling happily behind him. He opens his mouth to say something, but is interrupted from a voice to the side.

“Are you going to make our poor new housemate wait outside all day, Tae?”

The light blush colouring Taehyung’s cheeks deepens, a sheepish laugh escaping. “No. I was just about to invite her in!”

He steps back and reveals the person behind him who had spoken, a tall man with dimples and silvery hair that did little to conceal the large, rounded grey ears atop his head. He seems a little awkward in his stance, like he has more body than he knows what to do with, but still extends an arm in greeting with a kind smile. “y/n, is it? Welcome, please come in. I hope you’ll enjoy your stay here with us, however brief. We’re happy to have you.”

Don’t cry, don’t cry! If you cry now you can never show your face here again. You clear your throat, returning his smile as you step inside and out of the sun, the difference in temperature against your skin immediate. “Thank you, I really appreciate your generosity in letting me stay here.”

“Nonsense,” Taehyung snorts, “Namjoon-hyung has been saying for months we should find someone to fill the spare room, and now you show up on our doorstep! It’s perfect.”

The taller, who Taehyung had referenced as Namjoon, seems a little bashful, his cheeks heating. Does everyone in this house blush so easily? You hope it’s not contagious.

There is movement in your hair again, the glider apparently needing to breathe, and you have your mouth open ready to explain when Namjoon beats you to it.

“Oh, I see you’ve met Jimin already!”

What?

The glider leaps from your head and onto Taehyung’s outstretched arm, climbing to his head before leaping from that too and gliding through the air, all the way around the corner. There is a small clutter, the sound of a light swearword entering the air, and then the ever-familiar patter of feet against hardwood. Another boy rounds the corner, ashy-blond hair tousled and parted by two small grey ears, bushy tail curling behind him.

He skids to a stop in front of you, dipping in a brief bow before rising and shooting you a bright smile. “Hello! Thank you for helping me! I’m Jimin, welcome home!”

It takes all of your willpower to keep the happy tears at bay as you tilt your head back and laugh, already feeling lighter than you ever remember feeling before.

O – O – O

Your next introductions to the hybrids you will be sharing your home with for the next three months go much smoother and without as many surprises as the last ones. Jimin, who seems to have warmed up to you quickly, was more than happy to take you on a tour of the house and to go through introductions while he was at it. He happily told you who was what hybrid as well, without you asking. You figured that he realised your underperforming human nose wouldn’t be able to tell, so he took the initiative and you’re thankful for it, because you were curious.

The oldest resident of the house is Seokjin, a red-panda hybrid who goes on a spree of stress-baking every time exam season rolls around. Most of the hybrids study online, as you learnt from Jimin’s excited chattering. The second you met Jin, as he preferred to be called, you were stunned at how handsome he was. Of course, any awe that rooted you to the spot quickly dissipated as he said a joke so painfully funny it left you with whiplash between the urge to roll your eyes and guffaw. You like him, though. He’s nice.

You quickly discover that all the inhabitants of this house are, though. Yoongi is the second oldest and a squirrel glider hybrid—something Jimin said he found funny since he was closest to Jimin, a sugar glider, and Hoseok, the third oldest and a sunny squirrel hybrid. He giggled as he told you, and you couldn’t hide your own smile even as Yoongi’s ear had flicked and he’d shot the two of you a suspicious look. The little fun fact Jimin had told you about Yoongi had taken you by surprise; he remotely operates the island’s radio, many of the tunes ones he has created himself. Often, if there is a festival, he will volunteer his time to work the music jobs there, too. Apparently Namjoon also pitches in, and Hoseok when he has free time outside of the classes he teaches on the other side of the island.

Hoseok is a dancer, Jimin had gushed, and while he teaches at the school part time, he also volunteers time outside of that to hold dance classes for the kids. Jimin told you that he joins occasionally, but less often lately since his workload for university has increased. He did tell you, though, that the youngest of the house had all but taken his place, his youthful heart at home mucking around with kids and helping them learn.

Jungkook is his name, and Jimin informed you with a very fond and very amused look that he is rather shy, so you might not see him for a few days. Apparently it had been uttered just loud enough for the hybrid in question to catch it though, because there was a tumbling sound from the floor above and a series of stomping footsteps. A head of long, wavy inky hair had popped over the railing, grey ears pinned back as a baby-faced boy delivered a glare to the blonde to your side.

“Hyung! That’s not true! I’m not too shy to even introduce myself!” he had defended himself avidly, red-faced and huffy. When his eyes turned to you, mouth open to follow through on his words, he abruptly shrank and all that escaped was a squeak. It took him a moment to conjure speech once more, and this time he was noticeably less bold. “I’m—I’m Jungkook! It’s nice to meet you! I have to go now! Goodbye!”

And then he was gone, and so concluded your final introduction to the residents you had yet to meet. You thought you had a good feeling when you first arrived, but now that you’ve met everyone and everything feels that bit more real, you find yourself thinking…

It’s a really good feeling.

O – O – O

“It’s not what it looks like!”

You raise a brow, book in hand as you stand at the edge of the sand bank where green bleeds into gold. Against your heels is cool grass, and your toes are dipped in the gentle warmth of the sand. Namjoon sits in front of you, beneath a tree protruding from the dune, with a bundle of leaves in his hand and a guilty look in his face.

“Isn’t eucalyptus toxic to humans and hybrids?”

“I’m not eating it!” Namjoon waves his hands in a frantic bid to assure you, eyes wide, and almost drops the leaves in question. His large, grey ears flick in his distress. “I was just… I know I can’t eat it but it smells so good… I was just sniffing it. It calms me.”

You let out a light laugh, walking closer and plopping down on the sand beside him, beneath the generous shade the tree offers. The sea breeze is kind and cools your skin where it smarts from the sun, tickling your neck and manipulating your hair into a tumbleweed. Namjoon snorts, helping you get it back in order.

“No judgement,” you say, crossing your legs and placing your book in your lap for the meantime. “Just wanted to make sure I wouldn’t have to take you to a hospital, because I do not know where to find one on this island.”

Namjoon grins, rosy cheeks complimenting his skin the way it glows gold in the sun’s glare. “You’d drag little ol’ me all the way to the hospital if you knew where it was?”

“Well, yeah,” you laugh, sifting sand through your fingers as you relish the sound of waves crashing barely a yard away. It’s so peaceful, you feel so at peace. “Since none of you seem to know what a car is.”

“We had a car,” Namjoon admits, face flushing violently as he averts his gaze, turning his head. “There was just, um, an unfortunate incident… that may have involved a tree, or two…”

You decide not to probe further, lest your current good impression of Namjoon come under threat. A beat of silence passes, before Namjoon shuffles, placing the bundle of leaves back on the grass. He angles his body a little more towards you, sniffing subtly.

“So… how is your stay so far? Is everything going okay?”

You can’t hide the expression of surprise that makes its way to your face as you turn to him, blinking. You don’t know what you were expecting, but for some reason it hadn’t been that. It’s awfully nice of him.

You’ve been on the island almost a week now. The interactions you’ve had with your housemates so far, though not too bountiful, have all been pleasant, and you genuinely have nothing to complain about. You haven’t seen much of Jungkook, Hoseok, or Yoongi—but that mostly comes down to incompatible work hours and commitments. Mr Bang’s nephews run the Rabbit’s Den, the local convenience store that occasionally hosts a few exotic goods, and they have been nothing short of helpful, polite, and friendly while you worked there. You have worked a single shift at the Resident Services Building too, and it was pretty chill. A few residents came in, happily introduced themselves to you, and then you helped them with whatever had warranted their visit. All in all, your stay has been amazing so far.

“It’s been good,” you say, and it feels so nice to have the words escaping your mouth be true to the warmth in your chest. “Everyone here is super nice. It does feel a bit odd though, sometimes I feel like I’m the only human here.”

“Oh, yeah. You are,” Namjoon huffs an amused laugh. “You’re the first human Mr Bang has allowed on this island.”

Your surprise is evident, and it makes him smile when he turns his head to give you a sly look. “He must have had a good feeling about you. Rabbit hybrids tend to rely a lot on their gut feelings and intuition.”

“Oh,” you say, cheeks warming. Well, you’re glad he had decided to let you in. You say as much to Namjoon, and he smiles brightly at you.

“We’re glad he decided to let you in, too.”

You’re not sure what to say to that, a little embarrassed from the unexpectedness of it—was he really telling the truth? You’d hardly spent any time with some of your other housemates…

A calm silence begins to settle between you, and you take the time to open your book and resume where you left off. You get so carried away reading that when you finally look up some time later, the sight to your side almost makes you gasp.

Namjoon had, at some point, fallen asleep in a little patch of sunlight that manage to pierce through the foliage—in the place of the large, long-limbed man you had been talking to is now a considerably smaller fluffy koala, sitting upright and snoozing lightly. You suspect this isn’t the most ideal position for him to be sleeping in, though, because every few moments he will sway on the spot, almost tipping but not quite going far enough to have an abrupt meeting with the sand.

You coo, unable to help it, but the sound quickly grows alarmed when he leans too far—before you can think your arms shoot out to hold him up, but it seems there is something true to what is said about koalas being clingy because the second he feels something touch him, koala Namjoon clings.

You squeak, a fully-grown koala now wrapped around your forearm. Slowly, you bring it closer to you (feeling your bicep burn all the while because damn is he heavier than he looks!), planning to use your other hand to ease him off, but it seems that the second you’re close enough he can sense your warmth and he wants in. You sit, exasperated and amused, with a koala now latched to your midriff, arm forgotten. Both your hands are now free, but at what cost?

You figure that he’ll probably let go when he wakes up, or he might fall back into the sand in his sleep, but until then you resign yourself to unexpected but definitely not unwelcome koala cuddles. You just hope he won’t be too embarrassed when he wakes up; you can already see him stuttering and going red in your mind’s eye. It brings a chuckle to your lips, and with a smile on your face you return to your book once more, a little more content than before.

O – O – O

 It’s been a while since you’ve had to deal with the dreams.

Usually, once they start you can wake yourself up, or you can manage to turn them around if they’re one you’ve had before. But some nights, when the dreams come, you’re helpless but to see them play out. Sometimes they’re not that bad, but even the milder ones leave you with a nauseous ball of anxiety beneath your lungs and a feeling of discomfort that digs claws deep in your bones.

About three weeks into your stay, you wake up after one such dream, a cursory glance to your phone and the painful glare of its screen revealing it to be the early hours of the morning. For a moment you simply lay, blinking, with your gaze rooted on the ceiling. You had strung up some fairy lights around your dresser, and on the plaster above you the soft colourful rainbow of their hue meshes and blends with the cool pools of moonlight slipping through your curtains.

Absently, and with a sense of resignation that you feel in your bones, you strip the cover back and climb out of bed, deciding you may as well grab some water since you’re likely not going to be able to fall asleep very easily anytime soon.

As you make your way through the levels to the ground floor where the kitchen resides, you’re careful to be as quiet as possible—you’re not sure how successful your effort is but you do know that quite a few of your housemates have been inundated with coursework lately and you don’t want to disturb any of the valuable rest they need so badly. Jimin had looked so wiped out yesterday that you’d literally had to pull him away from the dishes and send him to bed. He complained on the way, but as soon as his head hit his pillow he was out, leaving you in a mixture of awe and concern. He explained as soon as he woke the next morning that he had been up all night completing an assignment, and it made you realise just how exhausted a lot of your roommates seem lately. You hope this period passes soon for them; you may not have been here long but you have grown to care for them and you don’t like seeing them so unwell.

You’re just pondering this when you reach the ground floor and venture into the kitchen, thoughts and feet coming to an abrupt stop as you take in the sight that greets you there.

Seokjin is standing by the bench, hands moving slowly as he puts something together just out of your view. A quick survey of the rest of the countertop tells you that he’s making lunches, and while ordinarily this would touch your heart (as it does every time you see how each of the hybrids in this house cares for each other), this time you’re overcome with a strong wave of concern.

Delicately put, Seokjin looks dead on his feet.

Every few moments his head bobs down, chin almost hitting his chest before he jerks awake just long enough to lift his head, before the cycle repeats once more. He looks so exhausted you’re impressed he managed to make as many lunches as he did. Though, from the looks of it he’s only about halfway through.

“Hey, Seokjin… are you okay?”

The hybrid jumps, the startle you gave him probably rendering him more awake than he has been in a few hours.

“Wh—what are you doing awake?” he sputters, having to lean against the bench so that he doesn’t fall over. “It’s almost midnight!”

You can’t help the look you give him, a mixture between amusement and concern. “Um… it’s a little past midnight actually… probably closer to two… are you alright?”

Seokjin blinks at you for a second while your words sink in, before he sags with a light groan, bringing a hand up to scrub at his eyes.

“Yeah,” he mumbles, voice thick with sleepiness. His bushy, striped tail sways behind him before curling around his thigh. “I’m just… kind of wiped out. I was up finishing a part of a really big assessment piece and it took longer than I thought… I was going to go to bed but then I remembered that I hadn’t prepared the boys’ lunches, and I always do that, so I came down here and…”

He makes a great, sweeping gesture over the mess on the bench, a result of his patchy attention. A huff of laughter escapes him. “Yeah.”

“I’m glad you finished your piece, but… do you really have to make their lunches? I think you should probably get some sleep…”

You were a little worried he might take your words the wrong way, but you can tell from the serene expression on his face that he doesn’t. “I always do it. If I don’t, then they might worry about me, and I don’t want them to worry about me when they should spend that energy worrying about themselves. Plus, I don’t know if I’d be able to sleep if I knew they weren’t done.”

You return his amused smile, taking a step closer and willing yourself to speak the idea that had come to mind.

“Well, considering I found you almost sleeping on the spot when I came down, I think you should probably call it a night and get some rest. I’d be happy to finish up and make sure the lunches are done, if you’d like?”

You can see the resistance immediately, the tall man opening his mouth to refuse—but he halts, and for a moment slips into his own thoughts. Sensing that he just needs a little push, you continue, “If you tell me what you usually make, I should be able to finish the rest of them without too much trouble.”

He blinks, and in that moment you see the rest of his exhaustion flood to the surface. He sniffles, unable to fight the yawn that rises. “… Okay. If that’s really alright with you…?”

You laugh, reaching to bump Seokjin’s side. “Of course it is. I don’t mind at all, especially if it means you’ll go to sleep in your bed and not on the kitchen floor. Now, what do you normally make…?”

Letting out a soft laugh, Seokjin does his best to stay awake long enough to instruct you on what he makes and how he makes it for the remaining members of the household. You can’t help but notice throughout his explanation that he doesn’t seem to make lunch for himself despite making it for everyone else, and as he finally plods off to bed and passes out, you make the decision that you’re going to make some lunch for him too. It takes you a brief google search on the diet of red pandas and their hybrid counterparts, as well and recalling what you know of Seokjin’s taste in food, but it doesn’t take you too long to decide on what to make. You work through the lunches one by one, grateful for the distraction, and complete the task fully when Seokjin’s sits primly next to the rest. You pile them all into the fridge, washing your hands again before grabbing the water you originally came down for, and then you’re making the trip back upstairs to your own bed, a soft smile on your face and a warm satisfaction curling around your lungs. You fall asleep easier than expected for a night where you had one of those dreams, but there most definitely aren’t any complaints to be found as you drift off with a faint smile on your lips.

--

The next day, it’s only a little before midday when Seokjin finally rises from his slumber and makes his way downstairs. Blearily, he reaches the kitchen and heads straight to the fridge, attempting to think through his sleep-addled brain what he should make for lunch. Those thoughts are interrupted as he catches sight of a box he hasn’t seen outside of the little tupperware cupboard by the stove in ages sitting on the middle shelf, a little paper tag with ‘for Seokjin’ scribbled onto it perched on top.

He pulls it out and places it on the bench, staring in confusion. It takes him an embarrassingly long time to kick his limbs into gear and open it, but from that point on the realisation comes quickly with the memory of last night.

You’d gone and made lunch for him, too. And from the looks of it, you’d paid great attention to what to include.

His stomach rumbles violently as he takes in the sight of berries and the bamboo shoots he usually stores in the fridge that you must have taken the time to boil and season. There is a sandwich in there as well but he doesn’t need to check whether he will like it because he can already smell the salmon.

He doesn’t know what to think, or really what to say. He knows he’s just lucky you’ve already gone to work at the Rabbit’s Den because otherwise you would probably be here and risk seeing his eyes tear up a little.

A side effect from being sleepy and stressed is the dramatics, he knows, but still… he can’t help but notice the warm feeling that lingers in his stomach when he thinks of how nice you are to do such a thing.

O—O—O

“You’re gonna love it when we get there, y/n! It’s so pretty, and there’s so much fruit… I’m going to feast.”

You can’t help but let out a laugh, thoroughly enjoying the company of your two housemates and the combination of cool breeze and warm sunlight the air offers as they kiss your skin. It’s earlier in the morning than you tend to wake up, but you’ve been invited out on an exclusive adventure and you aren’t in any position to say no. For the past few weeks you’ve noticed that on a Saturday and Sunday morning, Taehyung tends to disappear. You don’t know where, and each time you saw him again you forgot to ask, but finally the opportunity had arisen for you to sate your curiosity. Happily, the lemur hybrid had informed you that there is a small section of the island towards the north that is absolutely packed with trees, bushes and otherwise, all peppered with ripe fruit. Some days he goes to tend to them, but on the weekends he confessed to you that he normally goes to harvest the literal fruits of his labour.

“Just don’t eat all of the tamarind again, Jiminie, or I will have to kill you myself.”

Jimin lets out a loud laugh, stumbling in his gait for a moment from the force of it. “Yessir! Understood, sir!”

Taehyung’s lips quirk into a smile, and he returns his gaze to the front to continue marching ahead and leading the two of you to his secret spot. You adjust your hold on the woven bag over your shoulder, brushing away some of the more unruly strands of hair that have made their way across your face by riding on the breeze.

“Thanks again for inviting me, Tae,” you say, unable to hide the skip in your step as you plod along after them, smiling brightly. “I’ve been wanting to explore more—it feels wrong that I’ve been here for a month and barely seen everything there is to see.”

Taehyung spins to flash you a beaming grin over his shoulder, ears flicking and tail curling happily. “Of course, it’s no problem! I did wonder if you’d like to come some time, so I’m glad you mentioned it the other day.”

Jimin gasps, the sound somewhere between playful and affronted. “You asked her yourself to come?! I had to beg for weeks! Weeks!”

“I told you, the fruit weren’t done when you first asked!” Taehyung whines, reaching back and pausing in his steps just long enough to whack Jimin on the shoulder. “You just didn’t listen!”

“I’m baby,” Jimin says, whether in affirmation or explanation you’re not sure. It manages to tear a laugh from Taehyung either way, and you’re no different.

You’re not left stewing in anticipation for long; before you know it you’re broaching the place that Taehyung and Jimin speak so highly of. Rounding a corner, you come across a large grove that ends beyond what your eyes can see—some trees curl and wind, others stand straight and proud with their roots covered modestly with smaller shrubbery. Vines cling and string around some trunks, but the one thing all of the flora in front of you has in common is that they’re all ripe with fruit, ready to be picked.

“Oh wow,” you remark, barely aware you’ve even said anything. A deep laugh sounds from beside you and you turn to see Taehyung grinning brightly, tail curling happily behind him and his little ears flicking with glee.

“Pretty, right? Some of these were already growing here when I found it, like the apples, but the rest of it I planted over time. I’m proud of how it’s turned out.”

“You should be!” you exclaim, pointing to the fruit displayed in the very image of temptation before you all. “Dude, they look delicious.”

“They are!” Jimin chimes in, flitting past you and snagging his finger in your sleeve as he goes to drag you along. “Come on, there’s a mulberry tree up the back and it has the juiciest berries. We have to pick them now before all the birds and fruit bats get them.”

Laughing, you allow the sugar glider hybrid to lead you into the grove of greenery, the man ducking and weaving around branches with ease as his feet follow a path well-worn into the dirt and grass. The splotches of sunlight that filter through the foliage are pleasant where they warm your skin, breeze ensuring you don’t get too hot beneath the kiss of a star. In the shadows of the trees, it is actually much cooler than you expected, but you can’t help but feel that the temperature, the air, the sights—everything feels perfect.

The mulberry tree, fondly called Ol’ Bessy as Jimin had eagerly informed you, is a large, looming monster of a tree with a plethora of winding trunks and subordinate thin branches that dangle and sway in the breeze in the image of a weeping willow. When you comment on the sheer size of it, Taehyung simply shrugs and tells you with a smile that it’s been here a long time, before anyone was on the island.

The three of you don't have much desire to waste any more time standing and dawdling, and so you begin your activity for the day, woven bags and baskets prepared and at the ready. You inspect the mulberries that are hanging lowest, spying the occasional green one but becoming easily appeased when you find bunches of ripe ones, plump and fit to burst as they weigh the thinner branches down.

Gathering them is harder than anticipated, because you hadn't accounted for the fact they they're, well, berries. It takes a few attempts and more than a few instances of stained hands before you figure out the best way to pluck them from the tree without bursting them. Taehyung saw the first one you popped and the way it went all up your arm, and hasn't stopped laughing since.

The three of you bounce between fruits and trees, filling your containers with whichever you prefer. After a while though you all seem to have the same idea to congregate at the mulberry tree. Admittedly, you hadn't been able to stop yourself from munching on some of the fruits as you picked them, but as you look at them and see berry stains around their mouths and apple leaves in their hair, you feel a little less guilty about it. Taehyung places his basket down, leaning it securely against the base of the tree trunk, before dusting his hands with a sharp clap and then resting them on his hips.

"Right," he says, eyes alight. "There's just one more tree to visit. I think you're gonna love it."

You tilt your head, wondering just what other kind of fruit he has up his sleeve when already you've picked so many. Surely he's constrained even a little bit by the climate? Or does he have magically green thumbs? Jimin giggles at your confused expression.

"How good are you at climbing trees?"

The question gives you pause. "Uh... decent? I suppose?"

"Great!" Taehyung exclaims, picking his basket back up and closing the lid to help secure it on his back. "Let's go!"

Once more you're lead in between and through the trees and shrubs, following the gleeful lemur hybrid and his grinning companion back to the middle of the grove. Before long you're stumbling to a halt, having reached the location and wondering how on earth you managed to miss this tree before.

It's bigger than Ol' Bessy by a decent margin, but confusion filters through you when you can't seem to spot any fruit hanging from its branches. You turn to Taehyung, about to question him, but he simply grins and darts over to the massive trunk (really, you don't think two of you could hug it from either side and have your fingers touch, it's so big). It's only after he begins scaling it with alarming ease that you take note of the grooves and footholds curled into the trunk, making it a naturally perfect tree for climbing. Jimin darts up after his friend, apparently also well-versed in the art of climbing this tree, and breaks you from your awed reverie with a shout over his shoulder.

"Come on, y/n! Or Tae is gonna take the good spot!"

Unsure what he means and unsure if you're willing to find out via Taehyung following through on that, you scramble to follow after them and do your best to climb.

It's easier than anticipated, actually, and dare you say it... relaxing. Though you're going higher and higher with each branch you clear, and see less of the ground and more of the canopy with each step, you can't say you're all that scared, or worried. If anything, it's as though a moment of peace has been captured in a bubble, and now settles like cool mist on a spring morning at the bottom of your chest.

In sharp contrast to the cool breeze that brushes your face as you emerge from the thickest part of the foliage, the sun is quick to kiss warmth back into your cheeks. For a moment, you have to pause in your climb, because the view around you is simply so beautiful you're at an absolute loss for words.

From here, the highest point in the grove, you can see a vast majority of the island, a sweeping panorama of lush greens and soft sands that blend into the crystalline waters of the ocean, sunlight turning the surface to a sea of diamonds. Along the stretch of beach, in the distance, you can just barely glimpse the sharehouse, and on the other side of the island the little market square where all the stores and restaurants are appears as smudges and blobs of dark colours.

"It's so beautiful, right?"

You're so immersed in your observation that for a second you almost don't even register that someone is talking to you. Mouth open in awe, you simply turn your expression to Taehyung; the lemur laughs, almost tumbling back from the force of it, and you're shocked back into the moment with worry until you see what stopped him from falling.

Here, at the very top of the tallest tree in Taehyung's secret grove, he has built a small little fixture, a deck with enough space for four people to squeeze onto it at most. It hugs the trunk of the tree and is braced on the few thick branches that split from the tree beneath it. A lot of it is untouched, natural wood, but the bottom is made of processed planks and some of the short balcony ledge has been painted with acrylics, little scenes spanning the length of the strips. You didn't know Taehyung painted, but figure you'll bring it up at another time when you aren't precariously clinging to the top of a massive tree.

Taking the hand that both men offer you, you haul yourself carefully up and onto the deck, marvelling as you get an even clearer view of the island from your new position.

"It really is," you answer him, somewhat belatedly. When the two of them settle down, tree swaying much like you imagine a ship would on the vast expanse of the ocean, you follow suit, with your back pressed securely to the trunk.

Jimin is already flinging open his container, smacking it onto the wood in front of him, and Taehyung laughs once more, the sound so freeing and light that it makes that little bubble of peace in your abdomen expand ever so slightly.

"And now, we feast!" The lemur says, eagerly opening his own basket and setting it in front of him, besides Jimin's. They're both set to overflow from the amount of fresh, ripe fruit piled in.

They shamelessly and unabashedly dig in, eliciting a laugh from you as you move your own bag before you to do the same. It's nice, the perfect lunch in more ways than one; the small amount of foliage above you offers just enough shade that you want for nothing more in the moment besides maybe a pillow or two, everything else accounted for in excess.

You're not sure how long you spend there, but you do know that the sun has made a decent amount of headway in its journey across the sky by the time the three of you are done stuffing your stomachs full, laying across the deck and squinting until the clouds swimming leisurely across the sky begin to resemble something you can put a name to. It's fun, and light, and for what is alarmingly far from the first time, you find yourself so thankful for the choices you made and the path that led you here, to be staying on this beautiful island with these lovely boys.

By time you finish and the three of you are heading back, you’ve eaten through half of the fruit and the boys are so full and sleepy from the big day that they’ve shifted into their animal forms and are now clinging to you, Taehyung with his long limbs around your neck and Jimin with his tiny paws clinging to the hair at the top of your head. You suspect he’s made himself another little nest up there, but can’t find it in yourself to be upset with him for it especially when the soft sounds and chitters he makes to communicate with Taehyung are so damn cute.

The trip back is shorter than you recall, and before you know it you’re approaching the sharehouse once more, it’s looming sides graced with the warm gleam of afternoon sun. Jimin and Taehyung are asleep as you reach the front door, and you’re saved from having to move all the bags and baskets in your hold to open the door when it opens for you. Hoseok is standing there, a startled look gracing his features that quickly blends into one of fondness as he sees his friends, something that makes your cheeks warm ever so slightly.

“Good day?” he asks, stepping back to let you in. You nod, unable to help the wide grin touching your lips.

“Yeah, it was.”

O – O – O

‘…They should be setting up a tower soon, so hopefully it won’t be long before I can call you again. But until then, I look forward to every letter you send, bubbles.

Write back soon! I miss you.

Love, Dad’

You sniffle, trying not to let out the tears that are so close to slipping from your eyes. You’re not all that upset, you love receiving letters from your father, but it’s just… a little bittersweet. You’d moved here to escape your family, following a certain incident that you’re not keen to revisit, and your father had always been and will always be supportive of you— but it’s hard, when he’s halfway across the globe on one expedition or another.

It was only in the past ten years that your father managed to snag the job of his dreams and follow the passion he’s harboured since he was a child, graduating from his career as an accountant through attention garnered from numerous big research papers to become a well-respected biologist. From the second he accepted the offer, he’d started down a path that led him spending a majority of his life outside of the home and always on the move, hopping from one destination to another.

Whenever he could, he’d take you with him, but he wasn’t always able to. This expedition, which has landed him in the Antarctic, is an example of that. While he can’t be with you physically, he writes often and calls every chance he gets—and though it saddens you sometimes when it highlights the dismal state of the rest of your family, more than anything you’re happy for him and overjoyed that after years of slaving in an office, he finally gets to do what he wants.

You inhale, closing your eyes and trying to let the breath escape in a long, level manner. It’s night, not when you normally go about reading letters from your father but this letter had come late and you’d almost completely forgotten on your way to bed. Taking the opportunity to get some fresh air, you’d taken the letter and made yourself comfortable on the balcony, using the ample moonlight as a makeshift reading lamp.

Placing the letter carefully on the table, mindful not to place it in anything dirty or unsavoury, you settle back in your chair and tilt your gaze to the skies, allowing your eyes to become unfocused and simply stare. It's a pretty sight, as you expected-- the stars are much more outgoing here, with no haze or pollution masking their display like in the city on the mainland.

You let out a breath, but even to your ears it sounds more like a sigh. You miss your dad, and you know he misses you too but despite the fact you know it's selfish of you, you kind of wish he had been here with you when you made the decision to move. Of course, you've told him all about it, and he's supported you wholly in every choice you've made, but it's not the same. You don't blame him, and you love him dearly, but still... you're allowed to be sad, just a little. Just for tonight.

Well, that had been your plan-- apparently the universe has other ideas that don't include sulking in the moonlight on your balcony. A scuffling sound disturbs your reverie from the side of your balcony, and you look over in time to see a decent blob of shadow scaling up the side of the balcony next to yours and flinging onto the railing. Once there, it halts, and your eyes adjust just in time to meet those of the creature-- the raccoon, you realise quickly. It tilts its head up, sniffling the air once, before pinning you with an unreadable look. For a moment the two of you sit in silence, locked in place by the other's gaze, before the raccoon lets out a soft noise and then it's little claws are clacking against the hollow metal railing, and it disappears beyond the wall.

Whose room is that... Jungkook's? You muse to yourself for a moment before you remember what kind of hybrid Jungkook is, and in the next second there is the sound of a door sliding shut and Jungkook's bright-eyed face pops around the side of the wall.

"Uh... are you okay?"

You blink, brain taking a moment to catch up and then decipher how he could have possibly known you were even a little bit upset. You recall suddenly that animals can pick up cues, like chemoreceptors, and tilt your head at him with a small smile.

"Yeah... no... I'm alright." You angle yourself more towards him in your chair, cheering internally when you see him stop hiding behind the wall and come to lean against the railing. "Was that you? Where were you off to, this time of night?"

Jungkook looks like he wishes to address the first thing you said, but your follow-up has thrown him a bit for a loop. You can't be sure your eyes aren't deceiving you, but you could almost swear he's blushing.

"Oh, yeah... sorry." He reaches a hand up to rub the back of his neck, hair mussed and eyes averted. "I know my animal form isn't that nice... sorry if you thought it was gross."

"What?!"

At the sheer suddenness and volume of your almost-shriek, Jungkook jumps about a foot in the air. His wide eyes swing back to you, chest heaving as he rests his hand in the centre of it. You clear your throat, shrinking a bit in embarrassment.

"Sorry," you wince, before going to elaborate on your earlier squawk. "But please don't ever apologise for something like that! I don't know who told you that your animal form is gross, but they can't be all that bright... it was cute."

He looks more like a deer in headlights than the animal he's spliced with right now, eyes wide and staring right at you. You can't help but laugh and tease him, just a little. "Cutest raccoon I ever did see, anyway."

He suddenly comes back to earth, slamming his face into his hands and letting out a long groan. It's from embarrassment, you can tell from the flashes of reddened skin that peek through his fingers. You don't say anything for a moment, letting him return to the conversation on his own terms. Jungkook might be one of the housemates you've interacted with least, but you've heard plenty from the rest of the hybrids in the house.

More often than not, it's about how shy he is and how cute it is when he gets embarrassed. You'd simply nodded and laughed at the time, but now you realise there truly is merit to everything they said.

It takes a few moments of Jungkook muttering into his hands before he pulls his face away, averting his eyes and mumbling softly, "... Thanks. That's really nice of you to say."

"You're welcome," you shrug, smiling when he risks a glance your way to gauge your reaction. Upon seeing nothing that will make him turn tail and flee back into the safety of his room, he eases up, returning his body to it's previous angle towards you.

"So... why were you upset?"

Surprisingly, his question doesn't bother you as you thought it might. You hum, watching as his gaze follows yours to the table, where the letter and the envelope it came in, addressed to you, lay discarded.

"Letter from my dad," you offer in explanation, watching his eyes light in realisation. "Nothing bad, I just miss him so it's... bittersweet."

Jungkook hums, nodding and resting his chin in his hand as he leans forward. "I understand. It's like that with my parents. I know they love me, and I love them, but they're pretty far away and I just... miss them. They're always working."

You're a little surprised that he can relate, although you suppose you really shouldn't be. You don't know very much about Jungkook at all, so it's not fair of you to assume anything about him, even in relation to your own experiences.

"Yeah," you sigh, looking to the sky for a moment as you try and organise your thoughts. "I'm happy he is where he is, doing what he's doing, but I think it's okay to be sad, just for tonight."

Jungkook hums, but doesn't say anything further. It surprises you when he speaks next, the two of you having fallen into a lull.

"Well, you could keep being sad for the night if you want, or... would you maybe wanna see the film I've been working on?"

Your head whips to face him faster than the speed of light, startling him into another jump on the spot.

"Really?" you ask, hurried as though the offer will be rescinded at any moment. "You mean it? I can see it?"

"Yes...?" Jungkook answers, somewhat bewildered. You launch from your chair immediately, rubbing your hands together-- you've heard really good things from the others about his talents in photography and editing, so you've been trying to figure out a way to slip it into conversation for weeks. You've wanted to see them for yourself so badly.

"I'm coming over," you announce, gathering the letter and envelope and already beginning to move towards your room. "I hope your room is clean, Jungkook, or else I'm gonna tease you!"

You'd just meant it as a joke, but the scrambling and hurried footsteps you hear after you say it make you think he took you seriously.

Well, you dad would probably want you to spend the night happy, anyway. You can save being sad for another night.

O -- O -- O

Your time at the house has gone by much faster than you anticipated, and while initially you'd thought that you wouldn't be able to wait to get out, now you find yourself feeling quite the opposite.

You kind of don't want to leave.

At this point, about two months into your stay, you've settled into such a comfortable, stable routine that you struggle to imagine going through the motions in any other way. Often after your early shifts you'll return to the house and catch someone lounging in the sun, and you will no doubt be roped into a short, sweet afternoon nap. On the weekends is group breakfast, and you make sure that you go to bed as early as possible the nights before so that you don't miss it. Taehyung drags you with him of a weekend to fetch fruit and Jimin drags you around the town in general. Some evenings, you find yourself accompanying Namjoon on a walk along the beach, both of you feeling more at peace than ever before when you're standing with feet buried in the sand, watching dusk bleed into twilight and the colours around you stain violet and periwrinkle in the absence of the sun's kiss.

Jungkook knocks on your door at late hours, grinning and eagerly summoning you to his room to watch his latest creation. Seokjin no longer resists your help every other night to make lunches, and has started including you in the schedule as well.

Yoongi and Hoseok are among the busier residents of the house, but you've still spent bits of time with each of them, probably moreso with Hoseok. It's not that you avoid Yoongi or anything like that, it's just that he happens to be the most busy and more often than not is holed up in his room. You don't always see him throughout the week, but he always attends house breakfast on weekends and you're thankful that you get to see him then.

Today, you're spending a little more time with Hoseok. Your shift ended early and you couldn't have thanked your lucky stars any harder, because today the squirrel hybrid had invited you to his dance class. Usually Jungkook or Jimin went with him, both of them enjoying dance as much as their older housemate, but they had both been unavailable today. You'd seen the way Hoseok's face had fallen when they'd told him, and had immediately asked about the class-- you didn't even talk for more than a few minutes before Hoseok was happily inviting you to attend.

It made you a little more pleased than you're going to admit.

You're on your way there now, actually, a skip in your step and a swing in your gait. You've got the tote bag you hold your work things in, and you can hear the rustling of the nuts you'd shoved in there last minute earlier in the day. You'd noticed that Hoseok had forgotten them, so you'd grabbed them to give to him when you saw him. Hopefully he hasn't stuffed himself too full of other foods in the meantime, though from what you've heard apparently he's such a workaholic that he probably hasn't even had lunch yet despite the fact it's currently three in the afternoon.

A majority of Hoseok's classes take place at the school where he teaches, in a room at the end of the drama block that often doubles as a dance classroom when the school gets the funding for it. When you arrive, the door is slightly ajar and upbeat pop is leaking through the gap, Hoseok's sunny voice piercing through the music like a pendulum.

"--and one, two, three, one, two, three-- that's it! That's fantastic! Really good job, guys!"

A smile is already on your face as you push the door open enough to let yourself in, gaze immediately falling upon a group of grinning children that are looking up at Hoseok like they're a tiny field of sunflowers facing their namesake. Hoseok stands before them in a borderline comical pose that only primary school teachers can really pull off, hands on his hips and a proud, beaming smile on his face. You can’t help but blink because for a moment it really was as blinding as looking directly at the sun. He spots you before you can recover fully, and greets you with a wave.

“Ah, perfect! Everyone, this is Miss y/n! She’s going to be sitting in today—I told her how good you all were and she couldn’t wait to see for herself. Let’s all say hello!”

A chorus of greetings is immediately thrown at you, the attention of the little sunflowers now completely on you. Some gasp and run over, grinning brightly at the novelty of a new character, and others watch from afar but seem pleased nonetheless by your presence and alleged eagerness to see them perform.

Before they can launch into conversation with you like you can so clearly see they want to, the ears of some kids ramrod straight and alert and others’ tails flicking in excitement, Hoseok calls them back to where he stands and to your surprise they obey immediately.

“Alright, let’s let Miss y/n get settled down and we can show her what we’ve been practicing, hm? Sound good?”

There is a chorus of ‘yes!’ that pulls a laugh from you as you make your way to the side of the room with the best view and plop down, cross-legged. Eagerly and very self-consciously, now that they have an audience, the small army of children runs to take their place in the formation, and Hoseok pulls his phone from his pocket to pause the song currently playing and pull up the one that matches their routine.

The opening notes filter into the air and Hoseok nods, foot tapping to the beat, before he counts them in and off they go.

Put simply, you’re so incredibly impressed. These kids can dance! You don’t have a doubt that they can dance better than you, not that you ever claimed to have much talent in that department. By the time they finish running through their little routine, you’re clapping and cheering loudly, relishing in the laughter that you’re exaggerated reaction elicits. Hoseok, too, is smiling as he sees how you interact with his students, wandering over after he takes them through it a few more times before giving them a small break.

"So, what do you think?" he asks as he approaches your side of the room, slightly out of breath from doing the routine with them the last few times. "They're so good, aren't they? They've only been working on this for a few weeks and already they have it almost perfectly down-pat. I'm so proud of them."

He slides down the wall next to you, reaching for the bag he'd dropped there presumably before class began; across the room all the students are reaching into their class backpacks for their afternoon snack, and it seems Hoseok has the same idea. You don't even remember the nuts in your bag until he rifles through his for a few minutes, brows furrowed when he comes up empty. His bushy tail flicks dejectedly, ears twitching back on his head, and he pouts.

"Damn, I think I forgot my lunch this morning," he says, and it's enough to jog your memory. You jump in place from the startle of it.

"Oh, I saw that! Here," you quickly reach into your own bag and pull out the nuts and dried fruits, passing it over to him. "I brought it for you, since I figured you'd probably want it at some point."

The way Hoseok's eyes light up when they see the little plastic bag in your hand is almost enough to make you laugh and/or coo out loud. By the skin of your teeth you barely manage to hold that reaction back, but you do smile as he cheers with a short, happy scream and eagerly takes it from your grip.

"My nuts!" Hoseok wastes no time ripping the bag open and grabbing a handful, setting about munching immediately. "You have saved my life today, Miss y/n. I was soooo hungry."

"Didn't get lunch?" you guess, already knowing the answer and having it confirmed when Hoseok nods, completely unfazed by the fact he'd skipped a meal or two.

"I was helping one of the students," he explains, munching happily. His bushy tails curls in content behind him, a sight that makes something happy and warm settle in your chest. "I don't mind missing lunch if it means they get the help they need. I do feel it afterwards, though. Sometimes when I get home I feel so hungry I could eat the whole cupboard out."

A laugh tears from you at his words, the image even funnier because he didn't specify whether he would be doing it in his human form or his animal form. The image of a squirrel wreaking havoc in the house pantry is funnier than you care to admit, but Hoseok just seems happy to have elicited a laugh no matter the magnitude.

It's just a small thing, spending the afternoon with Hoseok and his students, but you find afterwards that it was almost... healing. On the way home, walking besides Hoseok and discussing which dried fruit were the superior dried fruit (he's wrong, and you'll take that opinion with you to the grave), you can't help but feel so light and happy. Like everything is in place, in motion and flowing smoothly. A river without debris and jagged rocks; life right now feels like that moment in nature when water runs over smooth pebbles in a creek, tumbling and pouring but doing so without chaos, and without mess or fallout. Just one continuous, fluid motion.

It feels nice.

You don't even realise until you're laying in bed that night that for a while now, that's how you've been referring to this place.

As home.

O -- O -- O

Aside from the occasional uncomfortable dream, these past few months have been remarkably incident-free, where it concerns the unfortunate topic of your extended family. You'd changed a lot of things when you'd made the decision to move to this island; your phone number, your email addresses and all your passwords, your social media... all of it had been combed through and either switched out or slimmed down. This place is an escape, a place of refuge for you, and that's how you want it to stay.

Unfortunately, the universe isn't always on your side.

It's a rainy afternoon when you receive the call, and you're so fixated on watching the way the rain falls in thin sheets over the ocean that at first from the first floor patio, that you miss it. They don't call again, but a message sets your phone off a minute or so later, and that catches your attention.

Of course, the second you read it and see who it's from, it does more than just catch your attention.

You're not someone prone to many episodes, and you've become adept at self-soothing. But as your eyes begin to stare unfocused at the message and you feel your chest constrict, diaphragm pushing against your lungs, you realise distantly that this is more than you just being momentarily overwhelmed.

You get a bit lost in the moment, lost in the sensation of light-headedness that suddenly washes over you, so much so that when a voice sounds distantly, muffled as though you're listening to someone speak to you from the depths of a pool, you barely even register it at first.

"Hey, y/n, have you seen--"

Still, your eyes are stuck on the message; you don't even notice the way your fingers had begun to tremble while holding the phone until a hand brushes your arm, a figure in front of you blocking the light from beyond the porch.

"y/n, hey, are you.... look at me. y/n, look at me."

Oh, that's a voice, and you do as it says without even a single thought flitting through your head. Looking up, you're barely even as surprised as you should be to see Yoongi standing there, a look of concern spread across his features, brows drawn together as he regards you. You feel a warm touch against your hand, phone tugged from your grip to be replaced with his own. Both your hands are now in his hold and he uses it to ground you, even if just for a moment.

"Can you do me a favour?" Yoongi says, and his voice is so soft and soothing that you find yourself listening as attentively as you can right now. "I need you to breathe with me. I'm gonna count ten breaths, okay? Let's do the first one-- in..."

He inhales deeply, his whole chest moving from the magnitude of it, and you feel as though you're floating in your own head in the moment as you follow suit. Slowly, patiently, he takes you through each breath one at a time, making sure you inhale as big as he does and exhale as long as he does. By the time you reach ten, the light-headed feeling has faded and the constriction in your chest has eased, ever so slightly. As soon as you finish your tenth breath you sag slightly, letting out a gush of air.

"Sorry," you say, slipping one of your hands from his grip to cover your face. "Sorry, I just--"

To your complete and utter surprise, Yoongi's hand lets your other one go and in the next moment you feel arms slipping around your shoulders, bringing you close to his chest and letting your face rest on his shoulder. You see his fluffy tail from where your face is squished, catching glimpses over his shoulder of the way it curls calmly.

Once the moment of shock passes, you're unable to help yourself but to return the embrace, surprised by how much you needed this without even knowing so.

"It's okay, don't apologise," Yoongi says, voice still soft and calm. You sag against him, and your eyes burn not from the message that triggered your almost anxiety-attack, but from the sheer kindness you feel emanating from this man. "Happens to the best of us. Are you feeling a little better?"

You nod, because oddly enough you are, and he slowly releases his hold on you, easing back with an assessing look. Another apology rests on the tip of your tongue but you bite it back, knowing he would refuse it if it ever entered the air.

“I am. Thanks,” you say, eyes looking for your phone as you realise suddenly that it is no longer in your hand where you’d left it. Yoongi holds it up, handing it back easily; his gaze passes over the screen as he does so, and the look he gives you is one of empathy and knowing.

“Shitty family?” he inquires, and you nod, choosing not to look at your phone and to slip it straight into your pocket instead. You go to sit against the wall, facing the edge of the patio, and he joins you.

“I get it,” he says, lifting a hand to fluff up his grey-tinted hair before shifting his gaze out to the rain and its reunion with the ocean. “’Part from my parents, the rest of my… relatives… they’re, uh… they’re not so nice. Didn’t treat me all that well, or even my parents for that matter. So… I get it. You don’t have to elaborate if you don’t wanna, but I get it.”

You don’t really know what to say to that; not that you’re speechless, per se, but moreso that there is simply so much going through your head at once that you can’t seem to settle on anything to voice.

“Thank you,” you say again, sniffling as subtly as you can as you focus on evening your breaths and calming your heart. You feel something on your hand and look over to see Yoongi has placed his palm over your own, his face soft and comforting.

“It’s no problem.”

A different kind of ache, the sort that is tinged around the edges with bittersweet warmth, begins to make itself known amongst the turmoil in your abdomen, and in this moment you can’t quite decipher whether it’s a good feeling or a bad one. What you do know, though, is that you’ve never been more thankful to have had the fortune of meeting these boys and having them make room in their hearts for you, even just a little, than you are right now.

O – O – O

You can’t believe that all the time you’ve spent here has gone so fast, and that currently there is no more than a week before your three month deadline is up and your contracted stay at this house is to come to an end.

If you’re being honest with yourself… you don’t want to go.

When you’d first come to this house, you’d expected that you would have a nice time, but also that you would be eager to move out by the end of the three month period. You had no way of knowing how well you’d fall into routine here, how attached you would become not only to the residents but to the home, the place and the feeling it offers and the way it allows you to feel happier than you have in years.

You know that you have to leave, they’d only agreed to house you for the three months after all, and you also know that they seem to have realised your time here is coming to an end as well. You’ve caught them talking amongst themselves a few times, not quite whispering but definitely conversing about something that halts as soon as they catch wind of you anywhere nearby. You get the sense that they’re unsure how to approach the topic, and you understand since it’s a bit tough for you yourself. You decide to bite the bullet and do it for them, though.

You ask them to meet you in the living area, a week before you leave, to talk. You wanted to just… officially thank them, you suppose. They’ve done a lot for you, in the time you’ve been here, whether they realise it or not. They’ve helped you settle, they’ve shown you that there really is more to life outside the misery your relatives tended to create, and they’ve ensured every second you’ve been with them that you have felt welcomed, and included.

Truthfully, it means more to you than you know how to put into words.

Which is why it’s especially difficult for you to accept that you have to leave.

The expressions on their faces as they gather are a mixture between curious and somewhat apprehensive, with Namjoon, Jungkook and Hoseok bordering on nervous. You wonder why before realising they might not know why you called them here.

“Hey, thanks for gathering,” you say, attempting to keep it light and ensure the smile stays on your face. Of course, they all return is as they take seats across the room, some on the couch and others on the coffee table or the floor. Taehyung’s head tilts, tail curling lightly behind him.

“Um, I just wanted to say something to you—to all of you, while I could. I didn’t think I’d be able to catch everyone in the one room any time but on the weekend,” you muse, smile widening at the round of light laughter your joke elicits. You shift, taking a breath and grounding yourself through the motion of meeting their gazes, one by one.

“I wanted to say thank you,” you begin, voice softer than intended but not so soft that you’re worried their senses won’t pick it up. “Because when I moved here it was to get away, and start anew, and you guys… really gave me that. You’ve made these three months the best and happiest months I’ve had in a long time. I’m so thankful that you let me in, and welcomed me into your home and even into your lives. I don’t think I can word this the way I want to but… really. Thank you, so much. I know I have to leave in a week, but—”

“Oh!”

You halt mid-spiel, wide eyes moving to Taehyung as he suddenly sits up, holding his hands out. “So that’s what you wanted to talk to us about—we actually wanted to talk to you about something, too.”

Freezing, you simply blink, mind coming up blank as to what they could possibly want to talk to you about. Namjoon clears his throat when no one else follows up after Taehyung, averting his eyes before he gathers himself and meeting your confused look. “Well, you probably noticed we’ve been talking amongst ourselves a lot lately—I mean, I know you’ve noticed because you’ve walked in on us a few times, and we’re not very good at being subtle, but—”

“We want to know if you’d like to stay here—permanently.” Taehyung cuts his friend off before he can finish, apparently no longer able to hold the question at bay. There is an expression of pure, unguarded sincerity on his face, excitement lighting in his eyes. “We all talked it out and found that we want you to stay—all of us.”

“You fit,” Yoongi says suddenly, voice still soft but loud enough for you to catch easily. He offers you a gentle smile when you look his way. “We know that if you left, the house wouldn’t be the same after… it would be missing something. You haven’t been here long, but you’re kind of already part of our family so… please don’t go, if you don’t want to.”

Some of the others are pinning Yoongi with a surprised look that you suspect is not directed at what he said, but rather the fact that he said it. You’re too busy biting your lip and trying not to cry like a baby to notice all that much.

“Is that really okay?” you ask, déjà vu washing over you as you think to yourself that again, this sounds too good to be true. “Do you guys really want me to stay?”

Immediately, there is a mixture of nods and loud ‘Yes!’s and ‘Of course!’. You really can’t hold it back, you find, because the sudden flood of warmth and affection washing over your insides is more than you know how to handle. You sniff, unable to reach the tears fast enough to prevent their fall down your face.

“Will you stay?” Yoongi asks, head tilted. Regrettably, his tenderness makes more tears fall.

“Yeah,” you manage, wiping your face furiously, “Yeah, I will. Thank you.”

And that’s all the confirmation you need before your new family is tackling you one by one, replacing your sobs with laughter and making sure you know that from now on, you don’t have to cry alone, you don’t have to be sad alone. They’re here for you.

And it feels so, so nice.

a/n: thank you so much for reading! please let me know what you think and how it made u feel, and let me know u enjoyed it by liking and reblogging! feel free to even just send me an ask screaming! thank u! i love u !

#btsghostie #bts x reader #bts hybrid au #hybrid bts #bts oneshot #bts fic #bts fanfic #ot7 x reader #bts ot7 x reader #seokjin x reader #yoongi x reader #hoseok x reader #namjoon x reader #jimin x reader #taehyung x reader #jungkook x reader #bts fluff #hybrid seokjin #hybrid yoongi #hybrid hoseok #hybrid namjoon #hybrid jimin #hybrid taehyung #hybrid jungkook #hybrid au #my work #sunshine riptide

[beauty-and-passion]

My True Identity: foreshadowing and cruel irony

I promised this analysis long ago. I promised I would have finally started the rewatch.

And here I am. After all this time, it's finally rewatch time.

Before proceeding with this, let me clarify a couple points:

These analyses won't have a clear schedule. As you know, some episodes take a lot of time, while others are much simpler and/or shorter. I will just post every time I finish an analysis.

Not all episodes might be worth an analysis. Some might be fused into one post, others might be completely ignored. That doesn’t mean they’re useless, but only that I personally have nothing to say about them.

For now, I don't plan to talk about episodes I talked about, like DWIT and POF. But who knows, maybe there will be something else to add, when I'll come back to them? Still, for now don't expect anything new for these two episodes.

These are all my personal thoughts, so I could be completely wrong about everything. If you disagree/agree/want to add something, please feel free to do it.

As always, I might talk about all sorts of themes, so read at your own risk.

And now, let's begin.

_______________________________

An unclear plan

When he looked back at the first episode of what would've become Sanders Sides, Thomas himself admitted he had no clear plan about what he wanted to do. Would he film just a bunch of vlogs with these characters taken from his Vines? Would he do silly, funny sketches and talk about some random theme every time? He had no idea.

And this episode shows it: it really looks more like a simple, light-hearted vlog with funny characters, rather than what it would've become.

And this is probably what makes it a very intriguing start. Looking at it in retrospect, you can find a lot of stuff. You can see a lot of cruel irony, considering what these characters are saying and who is saying what. You can see a lot of points that will actually be discussed throughout the series. And you can even notice a lot of foreshadowing.

_______________________________

The main point of Sanders Sides

[Thomas]: Do I really know myself as well as I should? (...)  I need to have a sit-down with myself, figure myself out, and maybe come to a better understanding that we all could learn from! Let’s do this!

This first episode might not take the future developments of the series into consideration, but the main point was still here.

Thomas doesn't know himself well enough. There's a lot he has to figure out. He needs to talk with himself and learn more.

Considering who are the last two sides Thomas learned about, this is just adorable. Look at this young Thomas, so cute and naive, thinking: "Oh yes, I will learn more about myself and it will all be fun and games! :DDD". So adorable, he has no idea what the future has in store for him.

This also connects to another point I mentioned in my analysis about the Dark Sides: before starting the series, Thomas didn't know his sides well enough. And we can see it in the way they interact between them and with Thomas.

For example, this part:

[Morality]: And no matter what, no one knows you better than yourself. Am I right, Tony? [Thomas]: Not my name. [Morality]: Then what is it?

I know it was a joke, but it was also a confirmation. Not even his own heart knows him well. Thomas never truly spoke with his sides - and they never truly spoke between them. They've always played a role - the teacher, the prince, the dad. Now they can start knowing each other.

_______________________________

Possible foreshadowing about Roman's arc

[Thomas]: Like, okay, relationships (...) where do I stand in those regards? [Princey]: I have a pretty ideal vision of love... There's someone out there for me... One true love... [Logic]: But you tend to overthink things, rule out possibilities with logic, dream up obstacles with each new connection you make... [Thomas]: And that when the anxiety kicks in. Maybe that’s why I haven’t found a person for me yet.

Oh boy, I can feel the last episodes and Asides looming over me.

Let's analyze each part of this conversation:

1) Thomas (and Roman) has a pretty ideal vision of love. One true love waiting for him. And now, guess what? Thomas is in love with Nico. And we all remember how Roman welcomed the idea of this new love in their lives.

[Roman]: I so... SO badly want this. I- I'm desperate for it...

And also how amazed he was, when they came back home:

[Roman]: A POET! To top it all off, he's a poet!

Considering the above premises, would it be so difficult for Roman to start idealizing this relationship with Nico? To consider Nico the “one true love” he talked about? To put him on a pedestal and, at the same time, search inside him all the characteristics the one true love should have?

This could lead to a very interesting possibility: Thomas putting Nico under the pressure of being his perfect man, to have all those characteristics his dreamy, romantic side wants to see. All while considering him incredibly perfect to the point of becoming inhuman.

All of this could end up only one way: scaring Nico. Maybe to the point of driving him away from Thomas.

2) Thomas overthinks, “rule out possibilities with logic” and dreams up obstacles. Could this also be a possible foreshadowing?

At the end of FWSA, when Thomas asked if they were ready for this relationship, Virgil stopped smiling, all while the camera slowly zoomed on him. The message was clear: Virgil isn’t ready for a change yet.

So we have Roman, who sees Nico as the perfect, ideal man of his dreams. And we have Virgil, afraid of changes, overthinker by nature and prone to self-deprecation.

The ingredients are all here: it is very possible that Thomas/Roman will put Nico on a pedestal and, the moment Nico is scared by Roman's adoration, Virgil starts to freak out and to talk bad about himself, because why someone so perfect and dreamy like Nico would ever love someone like Thomas?

This could potentially lead to a heated confrontation between Virgil and Roman that could be the metaphorical last nail on the coffin: Roman is already hurt because Patton sided with Janus. Nico drifting away from Thomas and Virgil's self-deprecation might convince him that yes, Thomas is truly bad and unworthy of love like Virgil says. He himself is bad and unworthy because he's not the perfect Creativity he should be.

And this can be a great starting point for his character arc.

  _______________________________

OH THE IRONY part 1: no one learned anything (yet)

[Morality]: But that’s okay. The important thing to keep in mind is nobody’s perfect. Everyone comes with their own flaws. [Thomas]: Including me. [Princey]: Yes, someone will accept us, flaws and all. Until that day, I shall learn to love... myself. 

Oh hey, look: the end of POF and Roman who still hasn't learnt nothing.

Jokes aside, I love how Patton is the one who says that everybody has flaws, but he excludes Thomas. It's Thomas himself who says he has flaws as well.

Doesn't that remind you of anything? Like this moment in SvS?

[Patton]: Well... Nobody's perfect... Except for Thomas! He loves his friends!

Patton saw Thomas as perfect and pure from the start. I love this, because it's very subtle and you don't notice it - until the events of SvS and POF.

But while Patton is finally learning (after almost 30 episodes) that Thomas isn't perfect, Roman is still very far from his goal of loving himself.

That's probably why he needs a romance this much: by focusing on someone else, he can easily ignore how much he doesn't like himself and his flaws.

And hey, I can even guess the name of these "flaws" he doesn't like so much.

_______________________________

These words are not foreshadowing at all

[Logic]: Um... Are we bringing up flaws now? Because if so, get ready to take a lot of notes. [Thomas]: Oh, uh... [Logic]: -continuing- Okay, you ready? Here we go. You procrastinate A LOT. [Morality]: You can be a bit selfish with your food and your other belongings... [Princey]: You’re definitely not the most adventurous person... [Thomas]: Okay, maybe this was a bad idea if I'm supposed to be learning to love myself. [Logic]: Ah, but remember, everyone has flaws.

Let's not forget that Thomas still had no clear plan, while filming this episode. This was supposed to be just a vlog.

But look at how the universe made these characters say these things. Look at dear sweet Patton, bringing up Thomas’ selfishness. How cute, he really has no idea what episodes are waiting for him.

And Roman brings up Thomas’ fear of changes. Awww, how cute, he has NO IDEA of the guy that will become his worst nightmare and his bestie at the same time <3

_______________________________

OH THE IRONY part 2: just look who's talking

[Morality]: Well, it’s important to be nice to ourselves and cut ourselves some slack every once in a while... [Princey]: Wouldn’t want to be our own villain, would we?

LOOK WHO’S TALKING.

Just look at the absolute irony of Mr. Selflessness talking about the importance of being nice to ourselves. Mr. Thomas-Should-Be-A-Martyr saying that cutting us some slack is good.

All while Mr. I-Thought-I-Was-Your-Hero tells us that we don’t want to be our own villain, right? Right?

_______________________________

Three fundamental questions

[Princey]: Well, what do you wish to look for in a relationship? What are you hoping to gain from having another person in your life? [Thomas]: Um... I don’t know. Someone who’s a nice compliment to me... someone who wants a long stable relationship... someone who indulges in the same sense of humor, and um... someone who can binge-watch cartoons with me.

This might be considered another foreshadowing of Thomas and Nico's relationship - maybe even the solution of the drama that will take place, after Roman and Virgil's fight we suggested before. The best solution: not putting Nico on a pedestal and seeing him as the perfect man, but appreciating him for who he is, for the normal guy he is - a guy Thomas loves and nothing else.

[Logic]: With everything you've learned, what do you wish to do with your education? [Thomas]: Ooh... I am not sure... I’d love to figure out ways to help the environment. Science was always my strong point and I love chemistry.

As I said multiple times, I think Thomas' decision to leave chemical engineering and become an actor will play a huge role in Logan's arc. And this question slighty hints at this.

At this point in time, Thomas still wants to use his education in a fruitful way. He still wants to use science, it's still his main goal. Doing silly videos is just an addition. "A good start", as he said:

[Thomas]: I think just being able to put out silly light-hearted content into the world is kind of a good start. It makes me really happy to do that. [Logic]: Well there you go. A good foundation.

And that's how Logan considers it as well: just a foundation. Not something that will take a huge part of Thomas' life. These videos are just a start.

This explains his reactions in the following episodes, especially how much he insisted on Thomas having a real job: after all, these videos are not something serious. Why focusing so much on them?

This could potentially be the starting point of Logan's increasing frustration and the reason of his final snap in season 3, that would also start his character arc.

But Patton’s question is what really surprises me:

[Morality]: What positive impacts do you inevitably hope to bring to this world?

Not only this screams POF, but it shows something for the first time: that Patton is silly, but he’s also clever. He’s not a complete idiot. He likes to be silly, he IS silly, but this question proves he's a lot more mature than he seems.

And if you think this is just a one-time thing, don't worry, we'll see it again in the future.

Is this a foreshadowing of my next analysis? Well, the episode was all foreshadowing, why can't I foreshadow something as well? ;)

( Support me on Ko-fi )

_______________________________

TAGLIST:

@willpowerwisps @royalprinceroman @reesiereads @mudpuddlenl @shelby-711 @allmycrushesaredead @aquatedia @sweetkirbi @whatishappeningrightnow  @effortiswhatmatters  @atlasistryingherbest @bella-in-a-bag  @doydoune  @miasheer  @forever-third-wheeling @mishanthropist  @corndot @payte @mcang3l  @geekyapollokid  @kawaiipotatuh  @hypnossanders  @idontreallyknow24  @imcrushedbyarainbow  @simplyapannightmare  @patton-cake  @hereissananxiousmess  @purplebronzeandblue  @cynicalandsarcastic  @empressserelene  @dubstepbranch  @chara-073  @lost-in-thought-20  @arobohamster @book-limerence

@riseofthewerewolf @frog-candy-bee @bosspotato01  @rosesandlove44 @methaley @sololad  @firey-alex  @sashootkahoot​ @chewy-rubies @groaaaaan  @croftergamer​ @misty-the-girlflux-mess​  @thedevilseyes​  @arya-skywalker​  @csi-baker-street-babes​ @queen-of-all-things-snuggly

@virgildarknessdementiaravenway​ @mishanthropist​  @dracayd-universe​  @unknown-artworks​   @lonelyfangirl453​  @starlightnyx​ @alienvamp-hesitantflowerface​ @stubbornness-and-spite​  @alittletoo-extra​ @averykedavra  @iloveeverytjing123 @bookedforevermore @joyrose-fandomer @anachronismes @the-cloud-14  @mihaela-tbg @igonnatalknothing

@thatoneloudowl​  @grayson-22​  @softangryfuckingdepressed​ @theotherella​  @boopypasta​ @nevenastark​ @varthandi @floofyconfusednerd @nothing-worth-mentioning @mikalya12 @roses-bubbles @cuter-on-the-inside  @coldbookworm  @orchidstanslogan  @snixxxsmythe  @frog-candy-bee  @holleratyour-buoyancy @alexowlndra  @fadingbagelbananapatrol  @our-bloody-mari666  @cxsmospooks  @riverraysong @sanity-whosshe-neverheardofher  @charmingcritter  @analogical-mess​

#sanders sides #sanders sides theory #rewatch #thomas sanders #patton sanders #logan sanders #roman sanders #ts patton #ts roman #ts logan #remus sanders #virgil sanders #janus sanders #ts remus #ts virgil #ts janus #my true identity #analysis