Brutus: How the fuck do people just stay motivated their entire lives? What drives you? I got out of bed once and I’ve been exhausted ever since
Cassius: you need to learn to hate life to the point where you want to get revenge on existence itself
A window to the universe
an owner to the sky,
supreme in his nature
a true light that darkness can’t deny.
With a hen and a pigeon
he created what we know,
to contact him in the heavens
send a prayer, call him and he will go.
“superior to anything else that existed” ~
Antony: if a woman asks if you “notice anything new” tell her “I do, your beauty surprises me every day”. Then continue thinking about velociraptors
Dynamics in Philippine Mythology
- Assume aromantic unless proven otherwise
- Either asleep or angry
- Walks around naked
- Will curse your village if you lie to their faces
- “Okay bro, you give me the Kaluwalhatian or I’m gonna fucking deck you.”
- “Makiling! Stop kidnapping men!”
- “Excuse me? I also kidnap women.”
- “I’m very protective of the humans. They’re so helpless.”
- Adored by everybody
- Is always right
- Eyeliner always en point
- “Please stop giving me your babies. I’m fine. Thank you.”
- “Please stop calling me the holy spirit. I’m not. Hahaha. Ur so sweet.”
- Shy and inlove
- Assume gay unless proven otherwise
- Will fight a powerful goddess just to court the local boi.
- “My closest brother is dead. I will make a whole planet just to bury the remains of my
- “Gender equality bitch!” Hits sister with a farming tool.
- “Behold! A coconut!”
- “Hi I’m Amansinaya and I don’t like you all.” *Swims to Marianas Trench* *Leaves responsibility to someone who doesn’t know shit about the ocean*
- “Hmmm… I can’t believe Amansinaya left me his apartment. I need help to manage things!” *Haik, a cute ocean god, greets the new neighbor*
- “Wow. Haik is such a cute name, will you marry me?” “Thanks. Sure why not.”
- A huge turf war happened because of a gay love triangle. (I’m looking at you, First Gens)
I’d be better off dead cause you’ll never be impressed
The Romans and Friends in Quarantine
Caesar: working from home, all day and night. Is trying to multi-task seven things at once. If the virus doesn’t get him, overworking himself will
Antony: Is drunk 24/7 and bored out of his mind, starts many projects and finishes none of them, plays far too many video games, takes up twelve new hobbies that he subsequently forgets
Cleopatra: is discovering that she’ll lose her mind if she’s quarantined with Antony one more day, has a secret stash of wine that she drinks in the bath
Brutus: spends his time writing poetry that he later crumples up because he thinks it’s all shit, lies awake at night haunted by every awkward thing he’s ever said or done, cries in the shower
Pompey: gets drunk and tweets shit he thinks is profound at the time, complains constantly about having to wear a mask
Cassius: rearranges his entire house, organizes everything down to the sock drawers, orders way too much on Amazon
Octavian: argues on social media all the time, has a shelf full of books he’s “definitely going to read next” but keeps buying more online instead
~ Bracelet (the backs of which are filled with a solidified ash-like substance, probably lava).
Place of origin: Pompeii, Italy
Date: 1st century
~ Agate Cup.
Culture: Near Eastern (Parthian)
Place of origin: Iran (?)
Date: 2nd century B.C.