#anyway all this to say i’m here sometimes but i’ve taken a big step back and im okay with that | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

fredwkong · 2 months

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Alphaworld File 3: Diary of an Alpha Transformation (1 of ?)

Click here to read Alphaworld in posting order.

An undated journal. It is heavily bedazzled on the covers, though many of the gems appear to have been scraped off or stepped on. There are several stains yellowing the coloured paper of the cover, mostly sweat.

Inside the front cover, there is a space where the owner is encouraged to write their name. Two names occupy the space, one on top of the other. The lower layer is written with a purple marker, neatly spelling the name “Ronaldo Herrera.” There are multicoloured sparkles drawn around the name, and glitter has been sprinkled over it. Some of the glitter appears to have been scraped off with a knife, and there is a 3 centimetre tear at the top interior of the page, as if someone was about to rip it out. On top of the first name, the name “RONNIE H” is scrawled in crude capitals using a pencil. The pencil was applied with sufficient force that graphite scrapes are visible from where they were brushed off the page.

Journal entries flow into each other without dating, but editors have split entries based on context and labelled them “Day One, Day Two, Day Three…” despite the fact that more than one day clearly proceeds between some entries. From this point onward, journal entries are transliterated directly, with marginalia and other notes on the text rendered in square brackets [] to distinguish them from the main body.

[Day One]

OMG, I’m soooo happy to be back on campus! Staying with my parents is such a bore! They don’t let me stream any of my shows, they say drag race is of the devil, and the town is so small that I’m, like, the only twink there. I can’t even get any dl dick all holiday because country guys are all totally masc for masc. My hole is toooootally desperate.

I’m so happy that Ollie across the hall got me this journal! He made it look soooo cute with all the stones! He’s, like, okay for a fellow bottom, even tho his massive crush on me is, like, totally obvious. Sorry babe, this dick is for decoration only lmao! Maybe we could get tag teamed by a big dick boy sometime, that’d be pretty hot. I've never bottomed alongside a transmasc dude.

Anyway, I just stopped at the dorm to drop off my suitcase and get out of my het drag, there’s a whole lotta frat parties starting tonight and if I wanna end my dry spell I’ve gotta be there! I just had to live my Sex and the City fantasy by putting down a few lines in the diary first!

[a doodle of an open-faced journal with scribbly lines on the page in rainbow colours]

[Day Two]

ZOMGGGGGGG [written in double-tall bubble letters across a quarter of the page, filled in with pink highlighter]

This term is gonna be SO AWESOME.

Campus is suddenly full of massive muscle men who are totally desperate for me! I was, like, totally the target of a dominance contest at the party last night, and it was SO HOT.

So I walk in, right? And I’m dressed in my usual, my lil slutty crop and my littlest shorts. Here, I took a pic before I left so you can see how cute I was.

Anyway, I’m cute, I’m obvious, I’m ready to have any guy absolutely wreck me. Like, last night, I would have taken a bicurious frat bro fucking me raw, my hole was so neglected. So I am a blaring neon sign: I’M A FAG [written in rainbow marker colours]

And as soon as I walk in, this GOD [a doodle of a massive man is in the margin, a perfect X shape covered in cartoonishly bulging muscles] comes up to me and is all, “Hey boy, I’m Nate.” He. Is. PERFECT. Gorgeous grey eyes, windswept dirty blond hair, a tank top hugging pecs the size of my HEAD. And his voice gets me tooootally weak in the knees. I can't believe he's LOOKING at lil ol me, even if I do look like a twinky slut.

But before I can even say anything to Nate, there’s another MASSIVE arm draped over my shoulder, and ANOTHER massive guy is whispering in my ear, like, “Name’s Lee. Want a drink?” I look over, and he’s just as hot as Nate, with shiny black hair and this perfect sexy smile like a J-pop star. But, like, if a J-pop star was 250 pounds of pure muscle and sex.

I swear all the air went out of the room. Suddenly, Nate and Lee were glaring at each other over me, and all these frat bros were staring.

BTW, when did all the frat bros get so cuuuute? Like, not as sexy as Nate and Lee, but they’re all totally cut this term and I think they’ve got some skincare going? Like I wanna go back sometime lmao.

Lee, like, GROWLED as he glared across me. I felt a li-ter-al rumble from his chest. Nate started totally flexing his big pecs, I thought his shirt was gonna shred in the middle. They didn’t even SAY anything, it was so totally primal. I think I got a whiff of Lee as he tucked me closer to his chest, and I realised he totally doesn’t use deodorant. He smelled totally HAWT.

Anyway, I have two perfect men fighting over me, and I’m not letting either of them go, so I go, “Boys, I promise my holes are big enough to share.” I totes flashed my dimples at them. [doodle of a smiley face]

They kept glaring at each other, but finally Lee was like, “I get his hole.” Maybe he, like, won the contest or whatever? Because Nate looked down at the floor and said, “Fine.” And I mean, fine with me! I love getting stuffed from both ends! What a way to come back from vacay!

We didn’t stay at the party long, just long enough for Lee to get me a drink and Nate to carry me around the dance floor a bit. I checked on Lee while we were dancing, and he was, like, totally making out with one of the frat bros. Like, a guy I knew was straight. I blew him freshman year when his gf was away. I guess Lee’s just like that, lmao.

We ended up upstairs. I think Lee’s in the frat? But we weren’t in his room, which was kinda hot. Lee and Nate sandwiched me between them as soon as we were through the door. I was tooootally surrounded by massive muscle as Nate made out with me and Lee sucked on my neck. I felt, like, high, with Nate’s big cock grinding into my belly through his jeans while Lee felt up my cute ass.

“You guys kissing would be so hot,” I gasped as Nate pulled off my shirt and Lee took off my shorts.

They both hesitated, I could feel it. “Oh c’mon,” I moaned, “you’re both tooootally hot, and you haven’t touched at allllll.”

Suddenly, Lee picked me up and threw me on a random frat bro’s bed. “I guess your mouth IS gonna be busy,” he said, which was SOOO hot, and then he started slicking up my hole.

Pretty soon, both hunks were balls deep in me. They were SOOOOOO big [doodles of massive, soft cocks cover the margins of this page] and I took ALL of them. Lee filled me up SO good, rubbing my prostate like he was fingering me. And Nate tasted, like, perfect. And the whole time, Nate kept pulling back just far enough that I could watch him and Lee kissing over me.

FUCK, they made me look like a little doll between them! I think once they were in me, all the dominance stuff went away, because they were TOTALLY making out. Nate’s, like, SO noisy, and Lee kept on doing that growl thing like he’d done before, which made me moan around Nate’s cock, which made him even noisier.

I came handsfree right before Lee flooded my ass and Nate filled my mouth with cum.

By the time our clothes were back on, Lee and Nate were back to playing their weird dick measuring game, keeping me between them as we went back to the party. I think Nate left pretty soon, but I danced for a bit longer and made out with a few frat bros. They really ARE super cute now, and they all seemed totally into me. Guess they finally got over being raging fucking homophobes lmao.

Anyway, I got home and crashed as soon as I’d cleaned all the cum and sweat off. Now my hand’s all crampy from writing for so long lol. Oooh, I should go tell Ollie all about it!

[Day Three]

I was, like, SO right.

The last few days have been AWESOME!!!! [jagged star doodles all around the word] I swear there are soooo many hunks on campus all of a sudden! One of my profs this term is a tooootal musclestud.

So I’m taking this class on fashion history, and when I looked it up, this Prof. Romano guy was listed for it. He was cute, one of those cute tweed aesthetic guys. You know, a fag who studies fashion. Like, OMG, that picture must be SO OLD.

I show up for class all ready to sit in the back row, but then I see this MAN standing at the podium. Like, total Italian stallion, with the dark waves and the stubbly jaw. He was, like, BURSTING out of his blazer. I could watch his pec bounce through three layers of fabric.

So obv I run down and sit in the front row. I’m not the first fag to have the idea, there’s already like 3 other twinks down there, but I’m totally the cutest. As the rest of the class comes in and sits down, these two GORGEOUS boys walk in and go up to the prof. They’re totally shredded, and dressed in complementary button-ups. And the muscle-god prof pats each of them on the head! Then they go sit down in some chairs behind the podium, and I can see their boners in their cute slacks.

The prof clears his throat, and it’s this DEEP, RESONANT sound. I got a total eargasm just listening to the rumble. “Good morning, class,” he says. And then his next words are TOTALLY burned into my brain:

[written in shaky block letters across a whole page] “You will call me Alpha Mario.”

And then he says, “I am your professor, and I will see you all for extra credit,” while rubbing himself through his pants, like half the class isn’t ready to have his babies. My cock was ROCK FUCKING HARD in my jeans. [doodle of a leaking penis]

He introduces his TAs as Beta Max and Beta Owen. IDK, maybe it’s a kink thing? He’s clearly their dom or something, they were totally devoted to him all class. I’d happily be Alpha Mario’s Beta if he’s hiring, lmao! [hearts are doodled around “Alpha Mario”]

Anyway, that’s just one ep in the PORN SHOW that is my life these days! Ollie’s room has been, like, a revolving door of cock since we got back, and I usually take two or three loads a day out on campus. This group of straight computer science geeks actually begged to fuck me yesterday, so I was dripping all the way home.

They were surprisingly buff for nerds, too! I should point out to Ollie that we gotta hit the gym if we wanna keep up with all the boys on campus this term. Can you imagine? Us at the gym! [The rest of the page is covered in stickers of the laughing emoji]

[Day Four]

Went to the gym today! Not to workout, but I had this new outfit idea and I thought it might get me noticed if I just hung out in the locker room. OH BOY, was I right!

Last few days all my clothes have been feeling super tight, so I’ve been doing a lot of [scribbled in rainbow marker] SHOPPING. It’s too bad, all my old clothes were suuuuper cute, but I’ve started giving some of my old faves to repeat fuckbuddies. One of the guys who used to push me around for being faggy, this guy called Brendan, has been coming over for the last few nights. I never realised how cute he is before!

Anyway, the first night Brendan came over he throatfucked me, but last night he told me he really wanted to feel my fingers in his hole, so I started fingering him! It was soooo hot that my cock ended up totally hard and before I knew it HE was blowing ME while I rubbed his prostate. He’s been texting me all day, begging to service my cock again. Lol, he just sent a voice message all like, “Please, Ronaldo, I’ll do anything to make you cum again!”

My point is I gave him a pair of my old booty shorts. They fit him perfectly, even though he NEVER had an ass as nice as mine before. He’s been wearing them all day today, just like I told him. It’s so hot, knowing he’s showing off like a fag even though he used to be a straight homophobe.

Fuck, I was writing about MY clothes! I’ve been so distracted by hot beta boys the last few days. I thought it was kinda time to change up my style, plus I looked super hot trying on some more dude-type clothes, so here’s the pic of me I took while I was hanging out at the gym.

I had guys HANGING OFF OF ME after a few minutes. It was totally hot, they wanted to do anything I said. Before long, I had a bunch of hot guys kissing me all over and all the cocks I could want to suck. Guys kept running out to grab their hot friends to join us, and all these guys were focussed on me.

At one point one of the staff came in, and I could tell it was to tell us to stop. He was a cute guy, really filled out his work polo, you know how gyms always hire swole dudes and curvy gurls to work at the front desk. I just gave him this LOOK from the middle of my pile of dudes, and I could feel his straightness melt away as his cock started leaking in his preppy shorts.

But just as I was about to cum, my cap got ripped off my head and I was dragged out of the pile by Nate, the guy from that frat party. I swear, he got even BIGGER since last time, he held me up by my shoulders like I was a paperweight. He was totally growling at me, too. He said something like, “I hate when they’re half done,” whatever that means, and then he yelled at all the other boys to get back to work.

Once we were along in the locker room, Nate shook me like a doll. “All the ex-het Betas can treat my gym as neutral ground, but it’s MY territory to you and the other half-done Alphas, you got it?” [note: Alpha and Beta are capitalised in the original text, although Ronnie does not seem to have been aware of the Alpha Phenomenon]

I was like “What are you talking about?”

Nate said, “You’ll get it.” Then I started smelling this INCREDIBLE smell. It was like really sharp cedar cologne mixed with fresh sweat. There was something else too, and it made me feel totally out of it.

Next thing I knew, I was on my knees swallowing Nate’s cock again. “Yeah,” he was saying while he fucked my throat, “this’ll speed you up. You’ll probably never submit again after this, so I’m gonna enjoy it.”

I just stayed there, taking him all the way into my throat. I feel like a week ago it would’ve been totally hot, but today it felt different. Nate using me made me MAD [underlined several times]. I felt like I should do something about it, like punch him or steal one of his boys, but the smell coming off of him kept me docile.

Nate came really quietly, which made me madder. My throat is an incredible tool, okay? Any guy should be screaming when I blow him, especially a noisy top like Nate. Then he patted me on the head like I was a little boy and said, “Head home. Drop a load in that guy who lives across from you, he should be progressing well too.” Then he just. Walked away.

I was gonna stay here all night just to spite the asshole, but I’m super horny again and I don’t wanna go back out. Maybe I’ll go see if Ollie’s got any visitors tonight or if he wants me to fill his holes for him.

[Day Five]

[From this point, entries are written in a noticeably heavier hand. Lowercase Es and Os become jagged.] Fuck, last night was fucking awesome. I knocked on Ollie’s door, and he answered in nothing but a thong, showing his bottom growth right through the fabric. His legs have been getting so hairy and thick, he looked super slutty. Plus his room smelled like sex and cum. I’ve been sleeping out, but seems like Ollie’s been taking house calls.

“Ronaldo?” he said, blinking up at me in surprise. I think we used to be a matching pair of little twinks, but guess I’ve had a growth spurt.

I shoved through the door. What was he gonna do, stop me? I was like, “Where’s your lube?” It came out of my mouth so deep, in a crazy manly register. “I wanna finger you.”

Ollie fuckin’ moaned when I said that, and stumbled over to his night table to grab it. He keeps his lube right out in the open, proud of how much cock he takes. I was already dropping my jeans, my cock was getting super hard and I hate feeling it strain. It deserves to be seen anyway.

Once I grabbed Ollie’s lube, he stood against the wall and presented his ass for me. Fuck, just remembering the look of all that hair on his fat ass is making me leak again. Okay I jerked a bit, should be able to write. [there is a stain on the page here]

Ollie’s hole was still loose from his last dick appointment, so I pushed three fingers in nice and easy. Ollie was moaning, all, “When did your fingers get so thick,” and “What’s happening to us, Ronaldo?” so I roughed up his G-spot a bit until he wasn’t being so articulate anymore.

“What’s happening to us is we’re gonna rule this school,” I hissed at him. I’d realised that it wasn’t gonna be enough to finger him and make him blow me. I needed to shoot inside his ass right fucking now. “Fags are in fucking charge here now.”

Fuck, wait, I need to text Brendan and get him over here. I need him milking my cock so I can focus on writing.

[There are several crude doodles of dicks, asses, and cum splatters in various marker colours before the entry continues on the facing page]

So anyway I slammed Ollie against the wall and shoved my cock into him. My cock’s so much fucking bigger now, too. Like it’s really filling up Brendan’s mouth while he sucks on me. I had enough cock to really saw at Ollie's asshole, and I felt him cum handsfree onto the wall.

“That’s it,” I growled in his ear as I had to hold him up. “This is what you’ve wanted ever since we became neighbours, right? Ollie wanted to get Ronnie’s big alpha dick in his hole.” It felt good to call myself a

[in massive letters on its own line] ALPHA

Ollie didn’t really say words at that point, just lots of “Yes” and “More.” I could hear his voice getting deeper with every thrust, too.

By the time I was getting close, Ollie’s room reeked like ME. It wasn’t a bad smell, but I knew any boy who came in here would be able to tell that all this musk and spice wasn’t just Ollie. It would take weeks for this to be really Ollie’s territory again now that I had marked it. “Fuck, show me that man pussy,” I ordered him, and threw him down in his bed.

Switching holes felt like the most natural thing in the world. I’m fucking built for topping, I can’t believe I thought I hated it. I fucked Ollie through a couple more orgasms and then let myself fill up his man pussy with what felt like 3 loads.

I fell asleep still inside him.

FUCK. I just came in Brendan’s mouth, and it felt totally different. Like, I marked Ollie’s room, but I didn’t mark HIM. His holes are open for anyone to fill. He can own other boys for all I care. But Brendan? Brendan’s fucking MINE. He’s mine he’s mine he’s mine. MY Brendan. [scribbled hastily] I need his hole NOW.

[written later]

I took a pic of Ollie before I started fingering him. I bet he looks totally different now, like me. Gotta go, MY Brendan’s gonna show me how to do a gym session.

To Be Continued...

#alphaworld #male transformation #mental change #male tf #muscle tf #reality change #musk tf #dom tf #hairy tf #gradual change #all fwkong

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apomaro-mellow · 10 months

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Demon!Eddie 1

Steve woke up to someone moving about the room. He wondered why someone was in his room before last night’s events caught up with him. Maybe if he kept his eyes closed, it never happened. Eventually he’d find himself in his own house with parents that were just disappointed in him, not psycho cultists.

“Rise and shine Sleeping Beauty. I slaved over a hot stove for your breakfast. Come and get it.”

With a groan, Steve finally opened his eyes. In the light of the morning, he saw that the walls of the bedroom were covered with posters of people he didn’t know. A gray t-shirt and some sweatpants had been placed next to him. Eddie was nowhere to be seen.

Steve closed the door before undressing. He checked his palms again. Any sign that he had been sliced was gone. But his shirt was still ripped and there was still dried blood on his stomach. God, maybe he should’ve taken that shower after all.

He put the new set of clothes on anyway and left the bedroom. It took about one and half steps to get to the kitchen, where Eddie was sitting with some cereal and milk.

“Slaved over a hot stove, huh?”

“I turned the stove on for the coffee”, Eddie said cheekily.

Steve was distracted from the quip by the large soup pot of black coffee sitting on the stove. This man might really be the devil.

“Soooo”, he sat down across from Eddie, trying to ignore the warning bells. “What’s next?”

“That’s all up to you, remember?” Eddie pushed and empty bowl towards him, along with the box of cereal. “So what does freedom look like to Steve Harrington?”

He thought about the choices his parents had given him before. For his room, blue or green. For his major, business or law. They had always told him it was his choice before giving a very limited set of options.

“I...don’t know. I’ve never had this much freedom before.”

“Well, let’s start with something simple. Cereal or milk first?”

Steve’s expression pinched. “In my bowl? Cereal first, duh.” He grabbed the box and began to pour it.

“Aah, but what if milk is the main event for me and I simply want a crunchy garnish on top?”, Eddie grinned.

“I’d like to assume you’re being sarcastic but after seeing the way you make coffee I’m just not sure.”

“What’s wrong with the way I make coffee?”

Steve looked again to the pot. He wasn’t even a big coffee drinker, but sometimes the way a person did things told you so much about them. “Who raised you?”

“Technically? Your little country club did. Been a while since someone used that summoning spell.”

“Is that how it normally goes?”, Steve asked. “You just show up, burn a few folks, and then make off with the sacrifice?”

Eddie tapped Steve’s bowl with his spoon. “Don’t let it get soggy. And to answer your question, it depends on the wish and what they give up for it.”

“They’ve been worshipping you for...years I guess. Why did you betray them?”

“Would you rather I have taken your soul and given them what they wanted?”, Eddie asked.

“I just...don’t understand everything that happened last night.”

“The spell they used that whole thing they were chanting, it doesn’t call upon a specific demon”, Eddie began to explain. “That incantation is like dialing 911. You’re kinda rolling the dice with whatever demon picks up. And for most folks’ sake, I try to be that guy.”

“So you just go around snatching up sacrifices and leaving people with an empty bag?”

“That’s a good way of spinning it!”, Eddie cackled.

“And you let them crash here?”

“Not often. Most of the time they’re just caught in a bad group or made a wrong turn. I just give em an escape route or help them back where they’re supposed to be.”

“So I’m the first person who’s such a loser I literally have no other place to go.”

“Loser is just another way to say someone’s got a not so lucky life. And hey, it wasn’t all bad before that point right? Lavish parties, nice house, people bowing to you in hallways.” Eddie was twirling his spoon between his fingers as he spoke.

“I’d trade that for a box in an alley if I knew...if I knew they were going to do that.” Steve’s brow furrowed as he stared into his bowl.

“You could still go back. Try and mend some things, follow in dear old dad’s footsteps”, Eddie suggested.

Steve scoffed and pushed the bowl away, crossing his arms. “If they didn’t want me then, they’re not gonna want me now. And I could never be like them.”

“So you’re not going into business. What then? Health, education, entertainment?”

“Well there’s no way they’re footing the bill for tuition, which means college is out, which means my options are limited.”

“Don’t be so sure. Your wish was for freedom. And I aim to keep my promises.”

“Unless you’ve got a bunch of jobs lined up willing to take on someone with zero experience-”

“That’s it!”, Eddie snapped his fingers and then stood up. “You want experience so you can make a decision. Take a shower, make a list and then we’ll get started.”

“Started with what?”

“Job hunting!” Eddie put his empty bowl in the sink and then went through a door Steve hadn’t noticed. “Be ready when I get back!”

He shut the door and then Steve was left alone. He wasn’t any less confused than he was before. But he managed to find the bathroom, wash himself up which did make him feel much better. He found a pad of sticky notes and a marker and started to write down some jobs.

He started with the kind of jobs he had when he played pretend as a kid. Policeman, doctor, zookeeper, firefighter, astronaut. Then he started thinking about careers he had a passing fancy in as he got older. Baker, writer, teacher, military.

When Eddie came through the door again, he had a wild smile on his face and Steve had a completed list.

“Let’s have a looksie”, he said, snatching it from Steve’s hand. He gave a whistle at the various jobs. “Hope you had your coffee.”

“Yeah, I’ll pass. What’re we doing with this list anyway?”

“Steve....have you ever heard of roleplay?”

The redness in Steve’s cheeks were immediate as he looked Eddie up and down and suddenly remembered the feeling of his tongue.

“You...y-you mean where like people dress up and they um, they-”

“That’s right.” Then Eddie opened that mysterious door and Steve found himself in the middle of a precinct. “They play pretend!”, Eddie finished.

Steve looked down at himself and saw an officer’s uniform.

“You’re gonna live a day in the life until you figure out whatchu wanna do”, Eddie beamed, giving him a nudge with his shoulder.

Steve heard a clinking and saw that Eddie was handcuffed. Today was going to be a ride.

Part 3

Tag Team:

@michael-the-angelo @swimmingbirdrunningrock @flustratedcas

@estrellami-1 @weirdandabsurd42 @lololol-1234

@chaoticvictorianspirit @giopandaonice @marklee-blackmore

@blackpanzy @kacatshi

#apo writes #fanfiction #steddie #stranger things #kinda a short transitional chapter #bf we get back to the meat of it

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grippingbeskar · 1 year

Text

bad shoulder

frank castle x fem!reader

warnings: adult content minors dni! (mxf, f receiving, nothing crazy) swearing, mentions of canon typical violence

a/n: this is dedicated to and requested by @lemon-world1 who’s birthday it was a few days ago IM SO SORRY THIS IS LATE but it is here! i hope you had an amazing day, and i really hope this is what you wanted!!!! sending so much love to you. its been a while since i just wrote a lil frank thing and damn i missed it okay bye.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

“You got a second?” Frank Castle’s familiar head pokes around the corner of your tent, traces of dried blood still caked in his short hair.

“Always for you.” You sing out, and he smiles, the sight sending warmth all the way through you. You turn to face him, and he isn’t shy about the way he looks you up and down, brown eyes trailing down your body before he remembers himself and focuses elsewhere. You always manage to get at least a little flustered when he comes in— especially when he’s all happy and smiling. He’s impossible not to want, and living on a base in the middle of a battlefield, there’s not a whole lot to do around here but sit and wait for him to show up.

It had been a long day, like it always was. You hadn’t even seen the sun rise before you were called in, soldiers that were never fully recovered still nursing old, aggravated injuries from whatever they’d been doing for the past 12 hours. From bad knees to wasted tendons and shattered bones, sometimes there wasn’t a lot you could do but make them as comfortable as possible and take away some of the pain, even if it was temporary.

Frank could come in and stand in the corner without saying a word and it’d make your day. It was stupid, but it was the truth. He just had that effect on you. It didn’t matter what time of the day it was, he just managed to surge adrenaline through you at the sight of him— you’d nearly forgotten your work the second he stepped in.

“Make yourself comfortable. I’ve got a few things to finish up and then I can help you out.” He nods and thanks you again, and you busy yourself with papers you don’t remember pulling out, trying your hardest to slow your racing heart down to an acceptable rate.

When you turn back to him, he’s already taken his shirt off, sitting with his legs over the side of the table. He’s so tall his boots still plant firmly on the ground, and you know it’s ridiculous— you know, but there’s something about the way he’s just so big—

“Your shoulder still bothering you?” Your brain manages to form words that make sense, while your heart rate is still flying uncomfortably close to a heart attack as he shrugs his shoulders. He rolls them out, each muscle defined and contracting with the movement, and your hands clench at your sides.

“Yeah. Gotta carry some of the packs for the medic on our squad, but it’s fucking killing me.” He rolls his neck next, but with the movement he winces. His eyes squeeze shut and his whole body shudders— the sight switching you from a fumbling mess to a professional in an instance. You know Frank— if he’s coming to you for help, he must be in some serious pain.

“Can’t someone else take the weight? I could write a report, let the sargent know?” You move behind him, the definition of each muscle practically shimmering under the full light of your tent. You peek over his shoulder, and he angles his head just so you can see the genuine surprise in his face.

“You can do that?”

“I’m not just here to hang out with you, you know. I do have a job here.” You laugh, and you can see his body slump a little as he joins you.

“I didn’t mean it like that— but nah. It’s okay. Coopers still got that bug leg, so I just gotta get this fixed.” Typical of Frank, but you’d probably write the report up anyways. It wouldn’t hurt, and Frank would never admit to anyone but you that the pain was genuinely bothering him.

You were the only person he seemed to let himself be vulnerable with, show any kind of weakness with. You’d seen him around base, and knowing what a pissing contest it is out there, it didn’t surprise you that when he found a moment of peace, it didn’t take a a lot for him to open up. You try to tell yourself it’s because he doesn’t have to worry about showing you up like he does everyone else around here, but you can’t help the part of your mind that wanders to the possibility that he might just like your company. Finds it easy to trust you and let his guard down.

“I’m gonna touch you now, okay? Work the same place as last time?” Once you get confirmation, your hands drift over the familiar position, but as soon as you apply pressure he sucks in a sharp breath. “That hurts?”

“It’s fine.” He says through his teeth.

“You have to tell me if it hurts, Castle. Job, remember?” He laughs again, but you can tell he’s still pulling away from you. “It’s okay. We can work up to that. Tell me what happened today.”

“Same old. You know how it— oh, fuck.” He grunts when you dig your fingertips into a spot that you know is connected to his old injury. “How it is.”

“Lay down.” He moves slowly— too slow to be in any kind of working order. You try to take the pressure off his shoulder as he turns to lay face down, but he’s still holding himself up and favouring one side. When he’s finally flat, you start softly, kneading your hands in slow circles around the connecting muscles. You listen to the sounds he makes— low grunts of either pain or pleasure, but both of them send butterflies fluttering in your stomach like no one else.

You start to span your hands down his back, letting the palm of your hand apply more pressure the further away from his shoulder you get. He sighs deeply, and after a few minutes he’s gone pliant under your touch. His head rolls to one side when you drift your hands up to his neck, another low groan escaping from somewhere in his chest.

When he’s finally relaxed, you press further. You check in as your hands slide along the base of his shoulder blade, and you’re only met with a gruff keep goin’ before you return to your original spot. He sighs, shifting closer to your side of the table, and the warmth of his skin touching you in all kinds of places has you blinking rapidly, your vision starting to go fuzzy.

Keeping your mind on the task at hand, you manage to kill a few more minutes like this; gentle circles and soft touches before you decide he’s ready to move.

“You still with me?” You break the silence, and he just huffs like you’ve woken him up. He still moves slowly when he gets up, but there’s no pain there. No— he was just relaxed. Tired, probably, but relaxed. “It’s feeling better than last time. You’ve been doing those stretches I told you about?”

“Yes, ma’am.” Your hands return to his shoulder and apply more pressure. He leans into the touch, head falling forward and sighing again. You ignore how much the response made your head swim.

“Everyday?”

“Yes, ma’am.” God— he was gonna kill you.

“And no more of those sandbag throws, yeah? Or those weighted pull ups?” When you don’t get an answer, you shake him with your hands. “Hey. Don’t fall asleep.”

“M’not. I’m ignoring the question.” You laugh, your hands stilling on his shoulder as you feel the muscle movement ease entirely. “I gotta keep my reputation up, or the new guys get cocky.”

“God forbid— because you are the picture of humble.”

“Damn right.” He leans back slightly, his back brushing against your chest. He doesn’t move when he feels how close you are, and though your hands aren’t on him anymore and the session is clearly over, you don’t move either. “Missed seein’ you.”

“You don’t have to rip your shoulder out of its socket to come see me, you know.” He’s facing straight forward, but every word you say has him shuffling further and further back into you.

“You sayin’ you wanna see me outside here?” He says softly, his head turning ever so slightly towards your own.

“Maybe.” You want to take the words back as soon as you’ve said then, but then he surprises you by turning suddenly, looking you right in the eye.

Your heart stops. Time stops, practically. You know you shouldn’t do this. You need to draw a line in the sand, tell him to move back. To look forward. To leave, even. You were at work, and he was just a… well. He wasn’t just another client— and that was the fucking problem.

He was so close to you, every short breath he took was loud in your ear. You didn’t have to bend to be face to face with him, not with how straight he’s sitting and how fucking close he is. You were at the perfect height to indulge all those fantasies you shouldn’t have, should never act on but God did you want to.

He turns even more, rotating so his chest facing you and his nose brushes against your own. You can’t help the way your eyes flutter closed in anticipation— it was too late to pull away. He was too tempting and he was right there. So close to you, no longer at arms length, and so when he brings one gentle hand to the side of your face, you don’t even think about pulling away.

Your heartbeat was in your ears, sounds of the outside floating away until all you could hear was the pounding of your anxious heart and Franks low, shuddering inhale. Your eyes dare to flutter open for just half a second, and you can see his own flitting over your face— searching for something. Rejection, anticipation, something that he was looking for, but he either finds it or he doesn’t, because whatever it was is enough to have him leaning just a slight inch forward and pressing his mouth to yours.

It’s so slow you nearly faint. Adrenaline is coursing through your veins, and his other hand comes to your hip, drawing you in to press against his warm skin. His tongue glides along your bottom lip, and your mouth opens, wanting to drink him and this moment in as much as possible.

He tastes like dirt and blood, and it’s so fucking addicting that your tongue tangles with his for another taste. He kisses you softer than you imagined, like he’s waiting for you to pull away. You try to bend closer, your hands sliding up into his cropped hair and sealing his mouth to yours. The groan of approval you get is enough for him to lose a little bit of that control. He groans your name into your mouth, and you squeeze your eyes shut tighter. When he groans again your feet leave the ground, Frank hauling you up onto the small table in one swift movement, putting you on your knees next to him.

His mouth never leaves yours in the shuffle, hand tangled in your hair as he gets a little rougher— hungrier for a deeper kiss. The need makes your head spin, and his free hand hooks under your legs to pull you across him, your legs naturally falling to either side of his muscles thighs.

You moan instantly at the feeling, Frank pushing your hips down to connect with his own. Your arms hook lazily around his neck, his own roaming from your hips up and down your sides. He’s languid with the movements, content to take his time to feel your body, fingers slipping under your shirt where goosebumps follow in his wake wherever he touches you.

“Fuck, baby.” He groans into you, and you shudder when his hips buck upwards. It’s almost like he’s encouraging it, wanting you to use him like this, hearing the way your breathless moans get higher and higher every-time he does it. “You like that?”

You can’t form a reply, just nodding as your head rolls to the side. His lips drop down, scorching heat under your jaw and down your neck. You can feel the cool kiss of his teeth as they drag lightly against your pulse point, and at the same time Frank grinds his hips up again. The sensation hits you like a truck, and you’re sighing out his name like a song in the next second.

“Oh, Frank.” You bury your head in the crook of his neck, and he hums in response and repeats the movement. He knows just where to roll your hips, the rough fabric of his pants creating the perfect friction, and a few more minutes like this and you’d be cu—

Three loud knocks on the door nearly make you scream in surprise and frustration.

“Hey, you in there? Any chance you got a couple minutes before rollcall? Need you to work your magic on this knee.” Fucking hell. You knew that voice, and it wasn’t one you could dismiss.

You were panting so hard you couldn’t reply right away, and Frank was just staring at you. His eyes were blown wide— not even blinking as he gripped the side of the table, knuckles white with restraint.

“Y-yep! Just a sec!” You scramble, trying to put yourself back together while Frank sits there, unmoving. You manage to get behind him, throwing Franks shirt at him just before the officer walks in and gets an eyeful of Franks painfully obvious boner. “Colonel Fields! I’m just finishing up with Castle, then I can help you out.”

“Sounds good.” The older man walks into the room, taking a seat in your office chair and nodding at Frank. “Lieutenant.”

You seem to have found your footing a little quicker than Frank, jabbing him in the back to prompt a fucking reply.

“C-Colonel. Ow.” He sucks in a breath as you dig your hands into his lower back pretending to do something productive, but then he sighs and drops his head when you ease up.

He’s as taut as ever, but you go easy on him considering what just happened. What… what did just happen? One second you were joking with him, laughing like friends, and the next you were kissing him. More than that— fuck, you probably would have let him have you right here on the table if he had kept going.

There’s another low, drawn out groan from Frank, and the sound has you pressing your thighs together. It’s the same one he breathed through your kiss when you were on top of him— and from the pained grunt that follows it, he’s remembering it too.

“You alright there, Lieutenant?” Colonel Fields calls to Frank, and you don’t know what his face looks like right now, but clearly it’s not hiding anything very well.

“Fine. Good. I’m gonna— I think I’m good.” He’s off the table in a second, slipping out from your practically outstretched arms.

“I’ll only be a second, if you need to—“ He was already shaking his head before you finished your sentence. Did he not want… Jesus, did he not want to finish what you started as badly as you do? He was walking straight for the door.

“All good. Thanks. I’m— good. I’m good.” He says, not looking you in the eye, and then he’s gone, leaving both you and Colonel Fields confused, and you a little cold.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

When you finally drag your body to your room, you feel like you’ve been hit by a freight train. You’ve had long days before, but this one is so much more draining. It’s like your heart has been wrung out and shoved back into your chest, and now you just have to walk around with this squished thing in your body that refuses to work properly.

Yes, you were dramatic. But you had a right to be! Frank had— well, he’d done all that, only to run out of the tent and disappear for the entire day. It’s not like you expected flowers and a proposal, but he was outright ignoring you.

Not so much as a text— no looks in the hallway, nothing. Even when he’d usually catch you for lunch, something that would have been ordinary and in his schedule, he wasn’t there. He could just be caught up with something, but your mind couldn’t help but wander to the possibility that you’d jumped the gun or read the room wrong.

You fell backwards onto your bed, the air rushing out of your lungs in a giant whoosh. You’d been harbouring feelings for Frank for so long, and you’d done so well at keeping them in check and at bay, no matter how many flirty smiles and sweet comments he made. But one moment of weakness— one look too long and too close was all it took for you to crack and have your entire heart and career shatter in one go.

Then you hear it— three soft but sure knocks on your door. When you swing it open, you don’t know if your surprised or expectant.

“Frank?”

“Hey, sweetheart. You gonna let me in?” You hesitate for just a moment, worried what he’s going to say. “I’m freezing my ass off out here. Please.”

You watch him shiver in front of you, and it’s only then you look down and see he’s just wearing boxers and the same shirt from this morning, as well as his combat boots, untied with no socks. You just step out of his way and hurry him inside, noting the snow piled up at your door and how late it must be considering the sun had long disappeared.

“Fucking hell. Its fuckin’ cold.” He says through gritted teeth, and you still haven’t said a word, but hand him a towel so he can dry off the fallen snow resting in his short hair. “Thanks.”

“Why aren’t you wearing more clothes?” The question slips out. Not that you were…complaining. But it was snowing outside.

“Yeah… kinda got caught in the barracks. Didn’t wanna waste time and walk all the way… are you alright?”

“You’re freezing— here.” You hand him one of his old jackets he’d given you months ago, and he takes it quickly, shrugging it over his shoulders. “You dissipated kind of fast. I just… sorry. This is weird. I don’t know what to say?”

“You don’t wanna talk, we don’t have to. I’ll…” He steps forward, a hand hooking under your chin to force your eyes up to him, “I’ll do whatever you want me to.”

“Wanted you to talk to me today.” You mumble and he grunts, shaking his head. “You were avoiding me. I thought you—“

“No, baby. No. Fuckin’ Fields has been on me since I deployed. He’d take any chance to send me home, and anyone I gave a shit about, too.” His hand hasn’t left you, though the other one stays pinned to his side.

“Oh. You— no, that makes total sense. You should definitely of— Of course! Yeah.” You make a complete dick of yourself trying to find a sentence that doesn’t make you sound insecure, and he steps into you, his body like a warm blanket.

“Doesn’t mean I wasn’t thinkin’ about you all damn day.” His breath his hot against your skin, and he presses a kiss under your ear before he continues. “Were you thinkin’ about me?”

“Mhmm.” Your eyes are closed, but you can feel him. Feel his proximity— how his other hand leaves his side and rests on your hip, tugging you into him. There isn’t an inch of him you can’t feel, and the hard lines of his toned stomach tighten as he bends down further.

“You wanna pick up where we left off, sweetheart? Let me show you what I been meaning to do to you since I fuckin’ met you?” Your jaw falls open and you nod again. He takes his chance, groaning your name once more before devouring you into a searing kiss.

He’s unbelievably big, dwarfing your size under neath him as he moves his hands lower and starts to tug at your sweatpants. You shuffle as best you can to help him, but you’re too occupied with the way he’s kissing you to do anything but squirm against him. He’s kissing you like he’s hungry for it, like there’s something desperate and sweet inside of you he’s never had before. It makes your head spin to think he might want this just as bad as you do.

He walks backwards, falling with a grunt onto your bed, tugging you on top of him. It’s the same as this morning, expect now there’s even less between you. Just the thin fabric of your underwear and his boxers seperate you from each other, but he’s no less intense with the way he moves you in slow circles while he licks into your mouth.

“Fuck.” He mutters and pulls himself away, mumbling as he rips your shirt over your head. He kisses you everywhere he can reach— craning his head to press his mouth to your collarbones, down your chest, feeling his hands run up to touch you where his mouth can’t.

He flips you over, your back hitting the soft covers of your bed and crawls over you. His arms cage you in, mouth repeating the motions and tasting your skin further down. He’s so slow about it— hardly even doing this for you. His mouth is as warm as his skin, trailing his way down until his short hair tickles the skin of your inner thighs. You can’t take your eyes off him, how easy he fits himself between your legs, shoulders spreading you open.

He breathes out, setting himself down between your legs, toying with the soft fabric of your underwear. His fingertips are rough, but his touch gentle, tracing the lines of your hips and sending zaps of pleasure up your body.

“So pretty, baby.” The words hit your skin, and you squirm under his hands when they hook under your underwear. He drags them down quickly, your hands toying with the short strands of his hair. Franks eyes meet yours, and you swear he gives you a cocky little smile before he sinks lower and your eyes squeeze shut.

His mouth is on you in the next second, burying himself between you. You feel the warm touch of his mouth swirl around you, arms hooking around your lower half and holding you down. You don’t want to move, don’t want to interrupt the intensity of his touch but you can’t help it— it’s all too much and you want to dive into it. Everything hot and sparkling sizzles up your spine, and you arch off the bed in such surprise when you feel his mouth seal over your clit.

You squeeze your eyes shut harder, a near painful grip on his hair yanking him both into you and away. He’s too strong, too overpowering to even notice your efforts, and you thank God he doesn’t fucking stop. You were whining pathetically now— his name echoing in high pitched in the small room. You feel him smile, your jaw going slack just thinking about what he looks like.

“Keep sayin’ my name— fuckin’ sounds good when you say it.” He leans back only slightly, and you gasp when you feel him lean his head against your thigh. The feeling of him— his mouth fucking wet with the taste of you, feeling the soft puff of his breath against your skin as he catches himself. Then he wraps his arms around your thighs and tugs you down the bed. “You okay, sweetheart?”

“Keep going, fuck—“ You whimper, trying to smooth your hands through his hair in an attempt to be nicer. He grins lazily, and then stares right into your eyes as he spits into your pussy and buried his face into you again.

Everything burns red hot, and your legs clamp around his head as he speeds up. One arm is enough to hold you down, the other snaking up our side and interlocking with your hand. You can’t keep your eyes open— everything going blurry as your eyes roll back and you feel yourself spinning in all directions.

You must say something— his name, maybe, because he groans and flattens his tongue, letting you grind your hips up and into him. If you could manage to open your eyes you’d stare back at him— let him watch as you fall apart in a way only he can break you.

Frank keeps a pace— fucking you with his tongue and swirling around the bud of nerves in such a messy but fiery way that you can’t hold it. Everything gets white hot and your back arches again, fingertips digging into his scalp and hand, and you know it’s cliche but you swear you can see stars.

Frank doesn’t stop, just slows down and works you through the shocks of pleasure that jolt up your core, feeling the way you shudder as you cum in his mouth. When your squirming too much for him to hold you still, he drags his mouth up your body. Again, he kisses his way up, but this time it’s messy. He’s not just kissing— he drags teeth and tongue along your hip bones, marking his way up to your chest and neck. You’ll be covered in the evidence, and you only lean closer, wanting more.

“Fucking hell, Frank.” His hands slide up your sides while yours palm him through his boxers, and he shudders your name. “Fuck, I want you so bad.”

“Do you, pretty girl?” He groans in your ear, and your stomach flips at the name. You bite your lip and nod, staring up at him and he grins. “You liked that, huh?”

“I know something I’d like more.” Blinking innocently, you slip your hand under his boxers and wrap your hand around his hard length. He cuts himself off with a choked gasp, leaning back down and kissing you messily.

You let him take what he wants, pressing his hips into the slow, teasing movement of your hand as you slowly slide his boxers off. The feeling of his skin on yours lights something on fire inside you, and while he’s nearly drunk on the taste of your mouth, you shove him easily onto his back. You’re quick about it, not giving him a second to breathe when you’re sinking down on his cock, earning another long, low groan.

“Oh fuck, oh fuck.” He gasps out, hands gripping your hips tightly. You roll forward slightly, feeling him hit something that makes you shiver, and he helps you chase the feeling. He moves you with no effort, bucking his hips and grinding you in out of rhythm thrusts, his eyes screwed tightly shut like he was in pain. “Oh god, baby don’t stop.”

“Feels good, Frankie.” His jaw goes slack with another stuttered moan of your name, while his hands touch you wherever they can reach. He glides up your stomach, over your ribs, your breasts, until he reaches your face where he hauls you downwards into another bruising kiss.

“Fucking… so perfect. Thought about this… fuck, that’s it. God that’s fuckin’ it.” He slurs between kisses, and he moves faster, rougher as he fucks you dizzy. It’s numbing and electrifying all at once, the grip of his hands on your face forcing you to stare into his half lidded eyes. “Such a pretty girl. Just keep lookin’ at me. Just like that.”

His free hand wraps around your lower back, his name coming out high pitched and drawn out as you call it over and over again. He kisses you, words mumbled into your mouth but the pleasure is too overwhelming— you couldn’t hear anything but the snap of his hips against yours and both of you chasing your high.

He bites your lower lip, drawing you back to him when he feels you tighten around him. He knows you well— he’d know you’re close, and his eyes burn so brightly in front of you that even though he’s got that cocky smirk on his face you still want to tell him how fucking good he is at this. He presses his forehead to yours, holding you against him as he brings you to the edge with a few more strewing, devastating thrusts and you’re gone— screaming his name so loud you know your neighbours will hear.

“Fr-Frank!” Your body shakes as pleasure overwhelms you, and he watches every fucking second of it. He’s right there with you, the look on your face when you cum for him sending him toppling over with you. He’s so warm and he’s everywhere— arms wrapping around you, mouth sealed to yours swallowing every little whimper and moan, cock buried so deep inside you, you know you’re gonna feel him for days.

The room is suddenly quiet, except for yours and Franks in sync breathing. You tuck your face into his neck and he buries you there, strong arms wrapping around your torso and keeping you as close as possible. When you feel his heart beat start to slow, you look up at him to find he’s already staring at you.

“You got no idea how long I’ve been waitin’ to do that.” He confesses, kissing you again. It’s lazy, indulgent and somehow he still tastes so good. It’s addicting, and you find yourself chasing his mouth until you’re breathless again. When he pulls away, he’s panting, shaking his head. “You keep kissing me like that and you’re in for a long fucking night.”

“Just one night?” You want to look away in case it’s not the answer you want, but he laughs, moving you to the side and tucking you to his chest.

“Fuck no.” He groans as he finally slips out of you. You sigh, content for now, and wriggle back towards him, pressing your ass against his hips. He freezes and his breathing changes, sounding very, very controlled. “Baby. Please don’t mess with me right now.”

“Oh, poor Frank. Stuck in bed with a girl. A naked girl. How’s he gonna make it?” Before you can be proud of yourself for the short silence you are awarded, he’s flipping you over and kissing his way down your chest and stomach. When he disappears between your thighs, you cry out his name, and fuck— you don’t think you’d ever get enough of this.

#frank castle #frank castle x reader #the punisher #frank castle x y/n #frank castle x you #marvel tv #the punisher x reader #the punisher x you #marvel #the punisher x y/n

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rillils · 3 months

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so um, so maybe i'm addicted to prompt generators. that might be a thing. hm. *screeches into the void*

rating: T wordcount: 1342 tags: fluff, crack, established relationship, bearded Steve because i've got a soft spot for him, general silliness, dorks in love, domestic bliss, aaand that's it i think

If life was fair, and not plotting to give Bucky an inappropriate boner in the middle of a crowded beach, then for once Steve might deign to look like an average guy enjoying a hot summer day with his man, rather than, you know, put to shame the rest of humankind with his luxuriant, marble-carved, sexy lumberjack league, mouth-watering presence.

But nope.

He walks out of the ocean with seafoam lapping longingly at his ankles, looking for all the world like Aphrodite and Magic Mike had hot writhing sex right there on the shore, without ever getting a single grain of sand in any uncomfortable places, and nine months later he happened, with his thick thighs and his tapered waist, and droplets of saltwater gliding down the slick planes of his torso like liquid diamonds. Which Bucky will abstain from licking off Steve’s skin, not because he’s feeling especially strong today, no – just so they don’t end up charged with public indecency. Again.

Steve’s face, though, as he splashes eagerly towards him, is the face of a kid who just spent the better part of an hour frolicking about in the water, flushed and animated, ecstatic, and bearing the promise of one hell of a nap sometime in the near future.

He seizes Bucky by the waist with his big wet paws, and presses a victorious kiss to Bucky’s mouth, nearly causing him to drop his ice cream bar – yes, the one Bucky bought just so he’d have an excuse to step back and enjoy the newly familiar sight of Steve Rogers having the time of his life, in the most joyful, delightfully mundane of ways.

He should get to be this carefree every day. Bucky feels very strongly about that.

“Come back in, honey, come on,” Steve cajoles, wearing the biggest, goofiest grin Bucky’s seen on him since the day he caught this very man hurtling down their driveway on a hoverboard at breakneck speed. It would have taken some pretty heavy divine intervention for him not to go crashing straight into the trashcans – and God must have thought it wasn’t worth the hassle, if the big oaf was just going to pick himself up and try again anyways.

“In a minute,” Bucky promises him. Because, while there might be a universe out there where he’s actually capable of denying this guy something he wants, it’s definitely not this one.

“Come on, the water’s great!” Steve presses on, his meaty hands squeezing gently at Bucky’s waist, deliciously cool against Bucky’s sun-warm skin. He’s like a big puppy begging for another treat, buzzing with energy, glowing with it from the apples of his flushed cheeks to the sparkling blue of his eyes. He is, for lack of a better word, fucking. precious.

Bucky slides his free hand up Steve’s chest, metal fingers stroking appreciatively over the dark whorls of his chest-hair. It’s ridiculous, how quickly he’s ready to give in.

“At least let me finish my ice cream, first,” he says, waving the thing under Steve’s nose. He could swear Steve’s ears perk up, like he’s only just noticed the stick in Bucky’s hand.

“Oh,” he says, and it’s a pleased kind of oh. “Can I have some?”

“’course. Here.”

Rather than passing the ice cream over to him, Bucky just lifts it to Steve’s lips, inviting him to take a bite.

Eyes crinkled with some secret pleasure, Steve leans in. The thin chocolate shell breaks with a crisp, satisfying crunch under his teeth, the creamy vanilla filling kissing his bottom lip and lingering there, helpless, until Steve collects it with a slow sweep of his tongue, never one to leave someone behind. The soft mmh he releases goes straight to Bucky’s gut, warming him from deep within.

He smiles, like he’s been trying to hold back and he just can’t help himself anymore. “Is it good?”

Steve gives him the Look – the one he gets in his eyes sometimes, when the toe-curling intensity of his gaze tells Bucky that he’s thinking about them – them in their bedroom, stumbling their way through the door with groping hands and tangled legs, laugh slipping into moan slipping back around into laugh, or on the kitchen counter, making the cabinets shake and the bag of sugar spill everywhere, or in the broom closet, caught by a mid-morning frenzy like they were last Saturday, quick and frantic and muffling each other’s moans, as if somebody might have walked in on them any second. And they’re in public, so Steve can’t do anything about it; but Bucky can tell he’s filing away all the words he wants to say and saving them for later, when he can lavish them straight onto Bucky’s sweat-slick skin.

“’S nice,” Steve rumbles, gaze dropping to Bucky’s lips for a long, deliberate moment. “But I know something better.”

A sweet shiver rolls down Bucky’s spine. “Do you, now.” He palms the side Steve’s neck, thumb circling over the delicate skin behind his earlobe, and pulls Steve to him, meeting him halfway into the kiss. Steve’s lips part gloriously for him, the hot caress of his tongue slipping the taste of chocolate and vanilla into Bucky’s welcoming mouth, spiked by a thrilling hint of salt.

A few drops of saltwater drip from Steve’s beard to land on Bucky’s bare chest, and from there trickle down his stomach, skirting his navel to soak into the waistband of his swim trunks, following a path Steve himself has traced with the tip of his tongue many a time.

Only too soon, Steve nudges his chin into Bucky’s own, pulling away, and Bucky chases his lips for one last peck before he lets go.

Steve looks back at him, eyelashes fanning darkly, thick with moisture. His eyes come alive with his smile, gleaming with the pure, blinding joy behind it. Openly adoring, they are, in a way Bucky couldn’t perceive any more clearly if Steve were spelling it out for him. He thinks Steve knows (how deeply, desperately) he feels the same way. He thinks he should tell Steve more often, just in case.

“You gonna join me, then?” Steve asks, all sun-kissed freckles and hopeful eyes, hands giving Bucky’s hips a playful little wiggle. Silly man. Bucky would reach up and pluck the sun out of the sky for him, if he only asked.

Bucky grins, and hopes it doesn’t scandalize any onlookers, with how obscenely fond it must be. “What about my ice cream, though?”

The curl of Steve’s mouth turns unexpectedly mischievous.

“Just hold it out of the water,” he says, and with no further ado, he swoops in to hook one arm behind Bucky’s knees and hoists him up, startling an undignified squeal out of him.

“What–! ”

Steve beams down at him, an almost manic glint in his eye. “Let’s go!”

And with the enthusiasm of an excited golden retriever, he goes bounding towards the glittering waves, kicking up wet sand behind them. Bucky grabs onto his broad shoulders, partly just to feel the firm muscle there, and partly out of a last-minute sense of self-preservation.

“Steve!” He calls out, laughter ripped out of his chest, sudden and shocking, as they splash a bunch of shrieking children on their path. “Put me down, you punk-ass manchild–”

“Nope,” says Steve, relenting only once the water’s reaching up to their chests. There, he stops, swaying gently with the tide, and shifts Bucky in his arms until he’s got Bucky’s legs wrapped around his middle, gathering him close. “I’m your ride for the day.”

And how could Bucky ever object to that? The ocean dances sweet and placid around them, warm under the midday sun, and the man he loves wants him here, tucked in the circle of his arms.

“Fine,” he says, pressing the word to Steve’s lips with a slow kiss. Fine, have it your way.

His last coherent thought, before Steve licks expertly into his mouth, is that they might not escape the public indecency allegations today, after all.

#stucky #stevebucky #rillers scribbles #why yes i do think my writing gets progressively dumber xD #can't help it #the braincell loves these boys #the braincell is trying its best #the braincell is probably going to take a break for the next 2837445098 years given my history #just wanted to exploit it a little bit before that happens

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dumfanting · 7 months

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Same Heart ch 30- Distraction

AO3 Link

Rating: E, explicit, if you’re not 18 get back to the rest of the cadets.

Warnings: arguments, dry humping/outercourse, love bites, being walked in on, Star Trek reference, face slapping (again), ass-grabbing, claustrophobia, medical scenario, full-body submersion

Notes: fem reader, force sensitive reader, second person pov, present tense

8400 Words

We’re getting close to the end! Not of the entire series, oho no, I have big plans for the rest. Just the end of this season/volume.

I know it’s been too long since the last update, but I’ve been busy. Got a job, worked for less than 3 months, then quit the job because my left leg is almost constantly in intense pain. So this took a backseat for a while.

The original draft of this chapter had close to 14,500 freakin words. After asking, the readers decided that it should be split into less intimidating pieces. So, that’s why this chapter ends, and the next one begins, kind of awkwardly.

F reader/ Echo

F reader/ Crosshair

There’s a ringing silence for just a second, but it’s quickly shattered by the sound of Crosshair’s laughter. You hadn’t even noticed him.

An hour or so passes after you’ve fallen asleep, and in this time, Echo and Crosshair take turns between showering and keeping an eye on you, even though they don’t really need to. So far, the most alarming thing you’ve done is snore so loud you almost woke yourself back up. Once they’ve both bathed, they sit on the large bed on either side of you. Crosshair is sitting upright against the headboard with his long legs stretched out in front of him and his arms crossed. Echo is more relaxed, slouching and resting his scomp arm on his bent knee, his hand near your shoulder, but not touching. You suddenly make a sound similar to an engine that won’t start, startling them both.

“Does she usually snore like this?” Crosshair asks. Echo raises an eyebrow and sits forward to better see him.

“Really? You’ve been in the same bunk room with her for how long and you’re asking me that?” he says.

“Okay, fine. Ignoring how Wrecker drowns her out sometimes, I assumed that when she was with you she would sleep through the night and not cry out or scream during nightmares instead,” Crosshair responds, shooting Echo a hard look, making him flinch.

“Point taken, damn,” Echo says, unconsciously rubbing at the back of his neck and cringing. He takes a breath and continues; “Anyway, no, she didn’t, so I’m guessing it’s whatever Kix gave her.”

You make another loud rumbling sound and they come to an unspoken agreement that you’ll be fine on your own for a little while, so they step outside onto the balcony and take a break from your snores. It’s quiet, by Coruscant standards, and the setting sun is warming their faces. Neither man speaks for about a minute before Echo curses under his breath. Crosshair makes a ‘what's up’ sound at him and he speaks again.

“Kix is putting her into that bacta tank tomorrow,” he says.

“Seems like a routine thing to me, what’s the issue?” Crosshair asks.

“The issue is that she’s claustrophobic, and she’s going to panic if she goes alone,” Echo says. Crosshair nods, understanding.

“And you’re supposed to be at the mechanics all day again,” Crosshair says.

“Yeah. As much as I want to be there for her like she’s been for me, I can’t just skip a day, Shalka’s emptied the rest of the week for me,” Echo says.

“So?” Crosshair says. Echo looks at him, confused. Crosshair rolls his eyes.

“You seem to have forgotten that I’m here too. I’ll go with her,” Crosshair says.

Crosshair has a point, but Echo hesitates, wondering if you have any other Force related tasks tomorrow. Crosshair seems to interpret Echo’s silence as doubt, if his words are any indication.

“What, you don't trust me? If either of us are going to walk out on her, it’ll be you,” Crosshair says, turning towards Echo and staring him down.

“Just what the hell is that supposed to mean?” Echo asks, also moving to face him, confused and on edge.

“You know damn well what that means,” Crosshair says, irritated but trying to keep his voice down. Echo bristles at him, immediately defensive.

“You don’t get to-,” he starts to say, but Crosshair cuts him off.

“What was it you said when we got to Shalka’s place?” Crosshair asks. Echo looks confused again, so Crosshair clarifies.

“‘If we're going to make this thing with her work we can’t keep doing this me versus you shit’ right?” Crosshair says.

“What does that have to do with-,” Echo says, but Crosshair cuts him off again.

“You and I both know that the problem is more than just us butting heads. You can’t keep running off on her when things get dicey,” Crosshair says, unaware that he’s getting louder. Echo looks like he wants to say something but Crosshair doesn’t let him.

“I have been thinking about this for a while, yes. I told you already that I’m getting tired of picking up the pieces after you leave her, and you and I both know a day may come when I can't be here for her after that happens; what’s she supposed to do then?” Crosshair says, nearly shouting now.

“The others-,” Echo says, but he sounds guilty and unconvinced by his own words.

“Have nothing to do with this ‘agreement’ of ours and you know it, do not deflect this onto them,” Crosshair spits before abruptly returning inside and Echo reluctantly follows.

When the balcony door shuts, you mumble and roll over in your sleep. Crosshair takes a breath and steadies himself, then goes into his adjoining room, removing himself entirely from the situation before it gets ugly. Echo wants to be mad at Crosshair, but he has a point.

Once Echo gets into bed with you, you unconsciously move closer to him. He holds his replaced arm around your shoulders and pulls you tightly to his chest. He drags his remaining hand down his face and spends a long time giving Crosshair's words some serious thought before deciding to apologize and make it up to you, even if he isn’t sure how.

When the morning comes, you wake up gradually before blinking at the sunlight that fills the room. You yawn and stretch, bumping into Echo, who is already awake and sitting up, but not Crosshair. You regain awareness quickly once you realize he’s not there, but take a breath and reason that he’s probably just in the refresher. Echo notices your movement and briefly looks at you, but doesn’t say anything.

This is unlike him, and you sit up before resting your head on his shoulder. He glances at you again, but his eyes look distant, and you can tell he’s deep in thought about something. After a few more quiet minutes pass, you notice that there’s no noise coming from the refresher, and frown to yourself. You return your attention to Echo, softly nudging his side and asking if he’s alright.

“Yeah, sorry, just thinking,” he says, before shaking himself and wrapping his replaced arm around you. You gently kiss his cheek.

“What about?” you ask.

“Crosshair,” Echo says.

“I wondered where he was,” you say, glancing out onto the empty balcony. “Have you seen him?” you ask, and Echo sighs heavily.

“Not since last night. He didn’t sleep here,” he says, and he sounds almost bitter, which confuses you. You move yourself so that you’re now sitting across from him and ask what happened.

Echo hesitates and won’t meet your eyes. You don't need to be Sensitive to recognize guilt like this, but if it wasn’t already obvious enough, a strong gust of it, mixed with self deprecation, blows over you from him. You close your eyes and pinch the bridge of your nose, a mannerism you’ve unconsciously picked up from Hunter, and you sigh heavily.

“You two got into it while I was asleep, didn’t you?” you ask, irritation simmering already. Echo nods, but stops you before you can go off on him.

“We were talking about you being in the bacta tank today. He said he’d go with you, and I didn’t respond right away, so he must have thought I was doubting him,” Echo says.

“Were you?” you ask, opening your eyes and watching him.

“No, I wasn’t. I was trying to remember if you were going to go back to the Jedi library or anything else like that,” Echo says.

“That’s fair,” you say quietly, then look back at Echo, prompting him to elaborate.

“He said that I’m the one who’s most likely to walk out on you,” he says, sounding hesitant. “Referring to all the times I’ve stormed off,” he says quietly, and you sense his shame when he meets your eyes. You, meanwhile, are listening intently, but your face is blank and the room is quiet for a moment.

“You agree with him,” Echo says, the feeling of shame intensifying. You hold back a sigh.

“Honestly? Yes, I do. I was thinking about it while the two of you were off talking that night. And while I do understand that you’re going through a lot-,” you say, and he gently interrupts you.

“You’re absolutely right, it's no excuse. I was taking a hard look at my behavior for most of the night after he went into his own room,” Echo says.

“And?” you say flatly. Echo takes your hand into his and softly says your name.

“And I’m sorry. I can’t keep running off like that whenever there’s a problem. I know better and you definitely deserve better,” he says, not breaking eye contact with you. Sensitive or not, you can see in his eyes that he’s being serious about this.

You say nothing, and your blank expression doesn’t change. Just as Echo wonders if he’s somehow made things worse, you suddenly move forward into his lap. You link your hands behind his neck and kiss him. He’s too surprised to react at first, but when you swipe your tongue across his lower lip he snaps out of it and opens up for you, morning breath be damned. The kiss quickly grows heated, and when you break apart, you’re both breathing heavily.

You shift your hands to his shoulders and lie backwards, pulling him down with you and kissing him as you both move. Echo holds his hand to the back of your head, and after a second of doubt, he presses his scomp link against your hip. You don’t flinch this time, and instead surprise him by tenderly taking it into your hand and holding it, even running your thumb across the very end. He can’t feel your touch there, but he shivers nonetheless before slotting himself between your legs. Ignoring the fact that you’re both still clothed from the waist down, you reposition yourself and move your hands to his hips, pulling him tightly against you.

Even through the combined layers of your panties and his blacks, you can feel his growing bulge against your heated core, and when you grind yourself against it, Echo groans your name. He follows your lead, rutting against you and making the lace rub perfectly against your swollen clit. You let out a high gasp at the sensation. Echo notices, of course, and repeats the motion over and over until you’re a whining mess beneath him. You’re so wet that it’s soaking through and he can faintly feel it as he humps downward against you. His cock gets harder and you can feel it prodding at your entrance despite the fabric barriers.

“Fuck Mesh’la, you’re so wet,” he says, supporting himself on his elbows as he looks down at you, still moving the entire time. You grind against him, hard, and he moans.

“All for you,” you say between gasps for air.

Echo moves his hand to one of your breasts and starts to rub his thumb against your pebbling nipple, making you whine with need. Impulsively, you wrap your legs around his waist and cross your ankles at the small of his back, trapping him and pulling him even closer to you. He makes a low groaning sound, then you feel his heated breath on your throat.

“I know you’re close,” he says, speaking directly into your ear. He sucks at the mark he left on your neck a few nights ago, darkening it again. As he does, you whimper, right on the edge.

“Tell me something, Mesh’la,” Echo says, speaking softly between kisses to your neck and jaw. You turn your head towards the door to give him better access. He nips at your pulse while continuing to grind himself into you, and just as the tight coil in your gut snaps, he speaks again.

“Who’s making you come like this?” he says. Your eyes fly open and you look towards the door that leads into the hallway.

“Tech?” you shout, startled when you see him standing there.

“What!” Echo says, shocked, and pushes himself upward away from you while you prop yourself up on your elbows.

There’s a ringing silence for just a second, but it’s quickly shattered by the sound of Crosshair’s laughter. You hadn’t even noticed him.

Less than an hour ago, Tech was waist deep in an electrical panel aboard the ship when his comm device began to beep at him. With a huff, he extricated himself and answered the call.

“I told you not to comm me unless it’s important,” he said, annoyed by the interruption.

“Oh, but it is important, Meds needs you,” Crosshair said.

“She does?” Tech said, surprised, then paused. “Very well,” he says with a sigh. “On my way.”

Crosshair snickered at him, then ended the call. Tech huffed again, knowing exactly what Crosshair had found so amusing. If anyone else had called for him, Tech would have told them he’s too busy to stop working, but he just can’t say no to you. The reason for this eludes and confuses him.

About ten minutes later, the two men met up in the lobby area of the hotel. Crosshair noticed the way Tech was nervously looking around for you, and softly shook his head before getting his attention.

“I thought you said Meds needed me?” Tech asked.

“She does,” Crosshair said flatly before walking off.

“Then where is she?” Tech asked as he followed Crosshair to your room.

“In here. I’m going somewhere with her today, and we need you to go to the cybernetic mechanic’s with Echo,” Crosshair said, coming to a stop before your door.

This shifted Tech’s attention, and after he asked, Crosshair gave him Shalka’s name. Tech immediately grabbed his data pad to run a holonet search on her and quickly became engrossed by what he found. So much so that he didn’t notice how Crosshair smirked at him before he unlocked the door. Tech blindly followed him through and into your room. Once inside, he was vaguely aware of your voice and Echo’s, but it wasn’t until you shouted his name, breathless and almost ecstatic, though confused, that he bothers to look up at his surroundings.

When he does, he’s mortified to find that Crosshair has casually led him into the room while you and Echo appeared to be getting intimate, and he’s now staring right at the pair of you. He quickly realizes that you must have noticed him and therefore said his name as you were coming, and blazing heat erupts across his face and down his body. He sees Echo quickly push himself up away from you, his loud exclamation of ‘What!’ being quickly drowned out by Crosshair's laughter.

Feeling almost detached, he hears you and Echo shouting at Crosshair, not for walking in on you, but for bringing him along. Even through the haze of embarrassment, this piques his interest, though he knows better than to ask about it now. You sit up on your knees and turn to face him, and it takes the both of you a second to realize that your breasts are bare.

Tech’s mouth has gone dry as his heart beats even faster and the heat travels lower, triggering a vivid memory of your first night aboard the Marauder.

The ship had been moving through hyperspace and the four of them were quietly discussing plans for the upcoming mission when you suddenly walked out of the bunks and into their midst. You loudly whistled at them, catching their attention. You kept it when they looked up and found you freshly showered with your hair damp. You were wearing nothing more than a simple bra and plain cotton panties, both black, but the sight had made his heart race and his mouth go dry then too. And he knew he wasn’t the only one; a quick glance at Crosshair, Wrecker, and Hunter found them all staring openly at you, different levels of shock on their faces. You set your hands onto your hips and said “quarters are tight, so I’m getting this out of the way now,” then spun around once on your heel to give them all a good look at you. Before any of them could say anything, you just as abruptly returned to the bunks, leaving behind a stunned silence and the faint floral smell of your body soap.

Tech forces the memory away, with some effort, and focuses back on the current situation.

He’d seen you in various states of undress before, but aside from that first time, it’s never affected him this way, though he quickly realizes why. For one, he doesn’t remember ever seeing your bare breasts, and for another, he’s definitely never seen you in this context, nude or otherwise.

Snapping out of it, he tears his gaze away from you and stares at the floor, sweating. He wonders if anyone would notice if he blasted a hole through it and jumped in. He hears you holler for them to wait in the hall outside, and is out of the door before the sentence has fully left your lips. Crosshair follows, still laughing, though thankfully not as loudly now. Once the door shuts completely, Tech rounds onto him, barely maintaining his composure.

“If that was meant to be a joke I am not amused! That was a massive violation of their privacy,” he says loudly before pacing in place, fuming. “Did you even really need me here, or was the entire point of you dragging me away from my work to embarrass me?” he says, turning on his heel to face Crosshair and staring him down.

“Oh no, we actually do need you around today,” Crosshair says, an infuriatingly smug look on his face. “That was just a bonus.”

A few minutes after you and Echo get dressed, you both step outside to meet Tech and Crosshair in the hall. You immediately notice that Tech is still sweating and unable to meet your eyes while Crosshair stands behind him, an infuriatingly smug look on his face. When you take a closer look at Tech, the humiliation coming from him is so strong that you nearly take a step backwards as it blows over you like a shockwave. This makes you so angry that your hand shakes, just enough to be noticeable. Echo sees the look on your face and seems to brace himself.

“Okay, first of all, the only reason I’m not yelling at you right now is because we don’t need any more attention brought to this, especially not from Hunter,” you say, your low tone and relatively calm demeanor surprising everyone.

“Good call,” Echo says, watching the door to Hunter's room. When it doesn’t open, you turn your focus to Crosshair and stand with your chest only inches from his before you continue.

“What the fuck is wrong with you? I swear on the Maker, Crosshair, I am two seconds away from smacking you again,” you say as you stare him down. This wipes the smirk off of his face. He doesn’t answer you, and you can tell that he’s become distracted by what you said. You roll your eyes at him, making a sound of frustration before you take a deep breath, count for a few seconds, then calmly take a step back and turn to address Tech.

When he briefly makes eye contact with you, the thin breeze of gratitude you sense from him is quickly overshadowed by want and arousal. Something about this sends a shiver through you, quickening your heart rate just enough to be noticeable. You pause for a moment, taken aback by all of these things, but quickly shrug it off as an uncontrolled and unconscious biological response to what he’d just seen and heard,’and what you felt.

“I thought you were working on the ship,” you say. There’s no trace of hostility toward him in your tone or body language, so he reluctantly looks back at your face.

“Well, I- I was, but Crosshair commed me, saying you needed my assistance, and when I arrived he told me that, since he’ll be with you all day, I should accompany Echo to see the cyberneticist, then he went inside and I- I followed without thinking” he says, stuttering with nerves and mortification, and you feel horribly for him. You glare at Crosshair, who shrugs a shoulder.

“Shalka’s not shipping out with us, so I figured he should go and see whatever maintenance you’ll need,” he says, mostly speaking to Echo. Echo looks at you and also shrugs.

“Makes sense to me,” he says, and though you agree with him, you’re still furious with Crosshair.

“Fine. You two,” you say, looking between him and Echo, “get lost for a minute. We’ll catch up.”

They both look mildly surprised, exchanging a glance, but do as they’re told.

Once they’re out of earshot, you pinch the bridge of your nose again, sighing heavily before you turn back to Tech, who has buried himself behind his data pad. You know that this is how he handles uncomfortable situations, and so don’t move to stop him, but you do talk to him, knowing that he’ll at least be listening.

“I’m going to have a serious conversation with him about this. He wants to barge in, that's fine, though annoying. But whether we needed you today or not, he had no reason and no right to drag you into our room like that,” you say firmly, then stop and take another deep, calming breath before continuing.

“I don’t blame you for what happened, Tech,” you continue, your tone changing as you softly say his name. You want to touch him, just a gentle grasp of his shoulder to emphasize your words, but hold yourself back. He’s been made uncomfortable enough already.

Tech chances another quick glance at you, and when he sees the same patience in your eyes that he had after telling you he had shown Echo those recordings, he relaxes a little more. He opens his mouth to speak, and his voice is raspy.

“I do have a question about your statement, if I may ask it,” he says before trying to clear his throat.

“Of course,” you say, “but let me get you something to drink first.”

“This early in the day?” he asks, confusion distracting him from his embarrassment and making you laugh.

“Nah, just some water or something,” you say, beginning to walk down the hall as he follows you. “Besides,” you continue, “I doubt any reputable place is open this early anyway.”

Tech glances at his data pad, then puts it away as he matches your stride, having just learned the hard way that he needs to be more aware of his surroundings. You lead him to the small caf stand in the lobby and ask the Romulan man working there for a bottle of water. He hands it to you and you thank him before handing over a few credits and leading Tech to an open bench nearby. Tech takes short sips of it, rehydrating his throat before saying a soft thank you. You respond by cautiously leaning against his arm for just a moment, and after you shift away, you’re surprised when he does the same. You decide not to acknowledge this and instead remind him that he had a question for you.

“I did, yes,” he says, then finishes the water in one gulp. “Earlier, you said that Crosshair walking in doesn’t bother you, aside from being annoying. Surely that’s not a typical reaction to being interrupted like that?” he says. You chuckle at him.

“I'm surprised you haven’t figured it out already, but then again, you haven’t seen any of us since we decided,” you say. Tech frowns at you.

“Decided what?” he says, looking mildly confused, a rarity for him. It was almost cute. You chuckle again.

“Cross and Echo are both with me now,” you say, managing to render him speechless, at least for a few seconds.

“I wasn’t aware that was a possibility,” he eventually says, sounding more surprised than you expected. You brush this off and simply nod at him. He appears to be deep in thought about what you’ve said, then he stands and tosses the empty bottle into a rubbish bin nearby. Tech turns back to you and, in a move that would be totally innocuous to anyone else, he boldly offers you his hand. In disbelief, you cautiously take it and allow him to assist you to your feet. He releases your hand after a second and asks where Crosshair and Echo had gone.

“Not sure. Hopefully they haven’t killed each other,” you say, glancing around the lobby before spotting Echo and Crosshair watching the two of you from near the courtyard door. You wave to get their attention, Echo waves back, and once they meet up with you, you lead everyone outside.

Earlier, Echo and Crosshair exchange a glance before making their way down the hall and into the lobby, eventually coming to a stop near the door that opens into the courtyard.

“You didn’t really answer her,” Echo says, staring at the sniper, who shrugs.

“We’ve all been telling Tech to be more aware of his surroundings for years. That obviously wasn’t working, so I decided he’d learn the hard way,” Crosshair says.

“That’s not your call to make,” Echo says.

“So it’s yours?” Crosshair says, annoyed.

“Of course not, but for fucks sake you could’ve warned us beforehand,” Echo says, equally annoyed. Crosshair opens his mouth to speak, but stops himself when he spots you and Tech near the caf stand. Echo glances between the two of you and Crosshair, who is intently watching your interactions.

“Don’t forget to blink,” Echo says, rolling his eyes. “I haven’t been around long, but I doubt he’d try anything.” They’re both watching you now, and when you and Tech bump into each other, Crosshair looks at Echo and smirks.

“He can’t stand being touched,” Crosshair says.

“I’d hardly call that a touch,” Echo says, rolling his eyes again.

“What’s that then?” Crosshair says, nodding in your direction. Echo looks back and sees Tech offer you his hand after getting to his feet. Even from here, he can see how surprised this makes you.

“You haven’t been around long enough yet,” Crosshair says, smirking again. “He may as well have kissed her full on the mouth.”

“If you say so,” Echo says. He sees you waving them over and raises his scomp in acknowledgment. While they make their way to you, Crosshair keeps talking, though his voice is low.

“I said she needed him instead of you,” he says. Echo makes a ‘So?’ sound at him, and he continues. “She’s the only one he’ll stop working for. Tech would have completely ignored me if I’d asked on your behalf. He can’t say ‘no’ to her,” Crosshair says.

“So, what, you think-,” Echo says, before Crosshair cuts him off.

“I know,” he says. By this time the two of them have caught up with the two of you, so the subject is dropped, though Echo notices the pointed way Crosshair looks at his brother, who is just as pointedly ignoring him. You don’t notice any of this.

Once outside, Echo and Tech find a taxi quickly. That suits you just fine, as you don’t really want either of them around while you’re dealing with Crosshair. You glare at him and grab his wrist before marching off and dragging him behind you, much like you had outside of Purkoll. Once you’re alone in an alley behind a nearby building, you let him go. Before he can open his mouth, you slap him, nowhere near as hard as you had before, but hard enough to get the point across.

“You-,” you start to say, but you’re suddenly cut off by Crosshair crashing his lips into yours as he backs you up against the wall, slotting his knee between your thighs like he had in the lift a few nights ago. He breaks away from you and, without thinking, you slap him again, making him curse and groan your name. Before you can react, he’s back on you and your tongues dance as he feels your chest up over your tunic.

Your hot anger is quickly becoming a different kind of heat, and you struggle to focus on anything but Crosshair’s hands on your body. He pulls back and grabs your wrists before you can strike him again, lust blazing in his eyes.

“Fuck, you’re beautiful when you’re angry,” he pants before dipping his head down to nip at your neck.

“Is that why you embarrassed Tech? To piss me off?” you say, then fail to hold back a high whine when he sucks at the mark Echo had left on you, darkening it even further. He straightens back up to look at you, that infuriating smirk back on his face.

“He needed a reminder to pay better attention. Besides,” he says, moving his head again to whisper into your ear, “I know you like being watched.”

You open your mouth to tell him off, but a gasp comes out instead, and you tighten your thighs around his leg while being only partially aware of it. Crosshair chuckles darkly, now pressed so tightly against you that you can feel the rumble of his voice in his chest.

“You can’t lie to me, kitten, I can feel it,” he says.

“Cross, that’s not the p-point,” you say, fighting against the need suddenly coursing through your body, barely able to stay coherent.

Before things can escalate any further, the two of you are suddenly interrupted by someone wolf-whistling at you.

“Oy, jackass! Go fuck her in that hotel like a gentleman!” they shout from above.

Crosshair whips his head in the direction of the voice, but whoever it was had quickly returned inside, shutting the window behind themselves. You take the distraction as an opportunity to wiggle out from between him and the wall. Crosshair notices when you’ve freed yourself, but stops you from getting too far away by grabbing your hand and pulling you close again.

“You know,” he says, wrapping his arms around you and starting to kiss along your throat, “that’s not a bad idea.”

Internally, you agree, but a sharp, painful twitch in your injured side reminds you of what you should be doing, and you break away from him once more, sighing heavily and straightening up your tunic. Besides, you think, you’re supposed to be mad at him.

“We will be finishing this conversation later,” you say curtly before heading out of the alleyway, and Crosshair quickly catches up. Back in the sunlight, you raise your arm to hail a taxi, and as one notices you, Crosshair wraps his arms around your waist from behind.

“I look forward to it, kitten,” he says, practically purring into your ear and nipping at your neck again before releasing you as the cab parks. You fail to hide the excited tremble in your knees as you enter the vehicle with Crosshair right behind you, squeaking in surprise when he grabs your ass.

The taxi is enclosed and being driven by a large, green, boar-like man who seems unable to speak Basic; he only grunts at you after you tell him where to go. Once the speeder merges into traffic, you stretch out across the backseat, draping your legs across Crosshair’s knees, much like you had in the cab last night. He looks at you while moving a hand up your outer thigh and you can sense the desire he’s still feeling. Sith hells, he’s hard to resist with that look in his eyes, you think. You glance at the driver, who must have somehow known what was going on back there, because once you make eye contact through the rear view mirror he snorts loudly and pulls down a privacy screen.

It doesn’t take long for Crosshair to seize this opportunity, and he grabs your hips, pulling you so that you’re straddling his lap as he sits with his legs open wide, watching you. You meet his eyes and bite your lip, nodding at him. Once you do, he wraps his arms around your waist again and pulls you closer, his lips crashing into yours. You open up for him and savor his uniquely smoky taste, giving over control to him. One of his hands slides down your back and smacks your ass. Knowing what he wants, you annoy yourself by breaking the kiss and moaning his name, clutching his shoulders. This prompts him to do it again, lust still burning in his eyes as you whine.

“I missed you this morning, hotshot,” you say, panting softly into his ear and making him groan.

“I missed you too, kitten. Fuck, I don’t think I’ll ever get enough of you,” he says, his voice a low growl. You shiver as he nips at the delicate skin of your neck yet again, and you unconsciously grind yourself down against him. He’s still holding your hips and as he kisses you, he pulls you down even closer to his groin.

Just as you drop a hand to grope at him, the speeder comes to a stop and the driver thumps the privacy screen with a squeal. You and Crosshair both groan at the interruption, but disentangle yourselves before the screen is retracted. As you turn around and lean forward to pay the driver, Crosshair grabs your ass again while also leaning forward, his chest against your back as he speaks directly into your ear.

“I am going to absolutely ruin you when we get back,” he says, his warm breath on the back of your neck making you shiver. You take your change, then get out of the cab, Crosshair following closely behind you as always. The cab drives away and the two of you head up the multitude of stairs that lead into the GAR headquarters, cooling off as you go.

“I know why you weren’t there this morning, by the way. Echo told me what you said last night,” you say, annoyed, as you enter the building.

“He needed to hear it,” Crosshair says flatly. Neither of you say anything else for a few minutes. You realize that you won’t be able to go into the Jedi Library with Crosshair in tow, he’d ask too many questions, so you quickly fish out your datapad from your bag and send Master Nu a short message to explain your absence. Crosshair doesn’t seem to notice this, and speaks again.

“So, since when have you been claustrophobic?” he asks.

“Uh, since I was a kid, I guess,” you say. Crosshair raises an eyebrow and barely stops himself from scoffing at you.

“Yeah, no, I’m calling bullshit. How do you deal with being on the ship or in the bunks?” he says. You roll your eyes at him.

“That’s not too tight of a space. Besides, fears aren’t exactly logical, Tech,” you say, nudging his side. He smirks at you.

“Point taken,” he says, and the two of you spend the remaining walk to the bacta tank chambers in companionable silence, his arm loosely around your waist and a hand on your hip.

Miles away, the ride to Shalka’s is silent in a painfully awkward way, as neither Echo nor Tech know what to say about what had just happened, or if they should even say anything at all. Just as the tension gets to be too much, the taxi comes to a stop. Internally thanking the Maker, Echo pays the cabbie and leads Tech outside.

He moves to go through the door and into Shalka’s place, but notices Tech standing back a few feet, hesitating. Echo turns to him, holding back a sigh.

“Okay, before we go in there, obviously one of us has to address the bantha in the room,” Echo says, albeit reluctantly. Tech nods once.

“I suppose so,” he says. “I…” he pauses, clearing his throat. “I’m sorry to have intruded upon you both like that,” he says, having a hard time maintaining eye contact.

“You do realize that wasn’t your fault, don’t you?” Echo says, frowning slightly. Tech shook his head.

“If I’d been paying more attention to what was going on I wouldn’t have followed Crosshair inside,” Tech says.

“Fair enough, I guess. Either way, neither of us blame you for it,” Echo says with a shrug. “But I’m sure she already told you that,” he says. Tech nods again.

“She did. You’re lucky to have her,” Tech says, feeling comfortable enough to step closer and speak more freely.

“I’d do well to remember that,” Echo says under his breath.

“You sound regretful,” Tech says, now standing directly beside him. Echo glances over at him with an odd expression.

“Sorry,” Tech says, appearing to choose his words carefully. “Was I not supposed to hear that?” he asks. Echo sighs and rubs at the back of his neck for a moment.

“No, it’s fine,” he says, sounding tired. “You’re right, regardless,” he continues. Tech doesn’t speak, but Echo sighs again, dropping his hand back at his side.

“When I stormed off back on Anaxes, it… wasn’t the only time I’ve done that to her,” he says. “Crosshair pointed out last night how damaging that’s been, and even if he was an ass with how he made his point, he isn’t wrong,” Echo says. Tech nods at him.

“I believe that was his purpose for having me barge in on the two of you this morning,” Tech says as he looks away, still embarrassed.

“Does he do that often, then? Prove a point by being a dick?” Echo asks, only half-serious. Tech rolls his eyes.

“It seems to be his specialty,” he says with a shake of his head. It’s quiet, for a moment, until the stuttering groan of a door sliding open grabs their attention. They both look toward the sound and find Shalka standing in the open doorway, looking at them with an expression between annoyed and amused.

“Well Hero, ya comin’ in or what?” she says. Echo chuckles at her.

“No sneaking up on you today, huh?” he says, following her inside, Tech behind him.

“Nope,” she says, popping the ‘p’ sound as she makes her way to her workbench at the back of the room. Echo takes his now-familiar place across from her and settles in. Shalka glances over at Tech, who appears to be closely studying the organized chaos of the workshop.

“I notice Sunshine and Jumpy ain’t here. He your sidekick today?” she asks, jerking her head at him. Echo nods, says he’s another squad mate, then quickly tells her where you and Crosshair are.

“Never did say how she got shot you know,” she says curiously, starting to carefully remove the outer plates of his replaced arm.

“I was shot at and she pushed me out of the way,” Echo says, the feeling of regret returning. Shalka sets down the objects in her hands and regards him with a serious expression.

“You must really be somethin’,” she says. When Echo looks confused, she elaborates; “She took a shot for you. I wouldn’t do that,” she says before returning to her task.

“For me or in general?” Echo asks without thinking. Shalka lets out a loud, bark-like laugh.

“I don’t like ya that much,” she says, then sighs. “‘Sides, the only ones I would do that for ‘r dead,” she continues, lowering her voice.

“Damn, I’m sorry,” he says.

“Listen, unless you were the fucker on that ship who fired a cannon at my village eight years ago, it ain’t your fault, so don’t be,” she says, frowning at him.

Echo remembers how Shalka had said ‘Ms Myrr has been dead for eight years,’ when they first met a few days ago and grimaces sympathetically before quietly asking if it was her mother. They both glance at Tech, who is now examining one of the hand drawn schematics pinned to the wall and paying them no attention.

“Yes, and my sister,” she says, her voice uncharacteristically soft. “I kept telling them to come here with me, I practically begged them, but,” she continued before trailing off. Glancing up again, she and Echo notice that Tech is finally making his way over towards them, and she clears her throat before speaking normally.

“There’s nothing I can do about it now, other than fixin’ you guys up,” she says, removing another piece from Echo’s replaced arm. He nods at her.

“‘Don’t let the fuckin’ seppies win,’ right?” he says, quoting her.

“Goddamn right,” she says, a determined look in her eye. Tech sits beside Echo, who quickly changes the subject.

“You still haven’t fixed the door chime then?” he says.

“Haven’t had time, been busy workin’ on your parts. Can’t figure out the damn problem anyway,” she says. Tech, who is now on his data pad, barely looks at her as he says he could fix it. Shalka laughs at him, incredulous.

“You really think so?” she says, sitting back and crossing her arms while raising an eyebrow at him. “I’ve been having issues with the damn thing for months, there’s no way you’ll figure it out,” she says, waving a dismissive hand at him.

To Echo’s surprise, Tech sets the device down and looks directly at her with an odd glint in his eye.

“Allow me to prove you wrong,” he says, unusually confident. Shalka smirks and points at the door.

“Have at it then, genius,” she says. As Tech gets up, Echo wonders which of them is more hard-headed than the other.

The next five minutes pass quietly, save for the noises that Shalka and Tech’s tools are making, until the front door suddenly slides open and a metallic chime can be heard. Shalka stops what she’s doing and stares at Tech, standing in the open doorway with a satisfied, almost smug expression.

“No kriffing way,” she says under her breath.

“Anything else?” Tech says.

“Who the hell did you say this was?” Shalka quickly asks Echo, flummoxed.

“Oh, I didn’t; he’s Tech,” he responds.

“I can see how he got the damn name,” she says.

After the door slides shut again, Tech returns to his seat at the workbench. After a few seconds, he notices a small but complex-looking part that Shalka is about to install onto one of the new plates. He sees a few others and delicately picks one up.

“These are very difficult to find,” he says thoughtfully as he examines it. “How do you have so many?” he asks.

“Oy, don’t touch,” she says, carefully taking the object from between his fingers. “It ain’t that difficult to find ‘em when I make my own in the room over there,” she continues, jabbing a thumb toward the smaller room on her left. “It’s a hell of a lot cheaper too,” she says.

“That is no small feat, I’m impressed,” Tech says. Shalka rolls her eyes at him.

“That must really mean something coming from you,” she says sarcastically.

Echo, recalling how Tech had been the one to decrypt whatever Tambor had hooked him into, most likely keeping his mind intact, quietly tells her that yeah, it is.

“That so?” she says. She sets down the tool and parts in her hands then stands and ducks into the smaller room before quickly returning with another object. This one is about the size of her fist, but appears just as complicated as the small one, and when she tosses it at Tech, he’s unprepared and fumbles not to drop it.

“Go on then, what’s that?” she asks him. After looking it over for about half a minute, Tech says one very specific, very long word, and correctly identifies it. Shalka looks impressed but fails to hide it before either of the men notice.

“Lucky guess,” she says, sitting back down and returning to work. Tech points out a few more very specific and very, well, technical, items hanging from the ceiling behind her. She pauses and looks him up and down before making a ‘not bad’ sound at him, and he abruptly looks away, clearing his throat. Shalka returns her focus onto Echo, and Tech to his data pad, the two of them glancing at each other every now and then.

Echo looks between them both and fights the urge to drag his hand down his face. He’s got a sudden feeling that he’s in for a very long day.

You’re familiar with the route to the bacta tank hall, having brought more than enough men there yourself, so you arrive sooner than you’d like. Crosshair steps through the open door and glances back at you when you hesitate. You really don’t want to do this, but you know how important it is, so you shake yourself and quickly follow him inside. Kix is waiting for you and looks surprised to see Crosshair.

“Echo’s still getting worked on, I take it?” Kix says, glancing between you two.

“Y-yeah,” you say, nerves creeping into your voice. Crosshair takes your trembling hand into his own, and you glance up at him, grateful that he’s come with you. You look back at Kix and feel a tinge of confusion coming from him, but he seems to brush it off.

“It’ll be this third one from the right,” Kix says, leading the pair of you toward the upright tank. Once there, he draws the privacy curtains shut around it and you begin to strip down to just your bra and panties, this set plain cotton in a deep emerald green. You sense Kix’s confusion again, and look to find him glancing between you and Crosshair, who’s casually eyeing you up.

“He’s seen me in less,” you say, nonchalantly waving your hand in his direction. Kix blinks at you in surprise.

“I’m surprised word hasn’t spread yet. Looks like Captain Reg does know when to keep his mouth shut,” Crosshair says, smirking. You shoot him a warning look and he raises his palms in surrender before going quiet again. Kix looks even more confused, but pushes past it. Now that you’ve undressed enough, Kix approaches and carefully peels off the bandages over your wound before he gives you a small injection in the crook of your elbow.

“I know how much you hate being in these things, so I figured a little sedative should help you sleep through it,” he says in explanation.

You nod your thanks at him and take a shuddering breath before nervously stepping closer to the small platforms leading up to the top of the tank. Crosshair notices that you’re shaking again, and he dutifully helps you up, making sure you don’t lose your footing on the slick surfaces. Once there, you sit on the edge of the filling tank with your feet dangling down into it. Crosshair gives you a quick, soft kiss before moving back to the floor, making room for Kix to reach you.

Kix hands you a clip for your nose and the mouthpiece of an airway hose. You put both on with shaking hands and slip yourself down into the room-temperature liquid. Your feet hit the bottom of the tank as the bacta reaches your waist, the stinging sensation in your injury making you grimace through your teeth. Crosshair, having watched all of this, stands beside you on the outside of the tank. He sees the way you’re shaking and says your name, getting your attention.

“You’ll be fine,” he says, holding a hand up to the glass. You do the same, and he continues; “I’ll be right here the entire time, kitten. Promise.”

At this point, the bacta has reached your shoulders. You nod at him, then reluctantly pull your hand away, straighten yourself up, and close your eyes as you feel the liquid pass over your head. You lift your feet from the bottom of the tank, and you float in place, feeling weightless. You make an effort to take steady, even breaths from the air mask, keeping yourself surprisingly calm while the sedative knocks you out.

On the other side of the glass, Crosshair doesn’t take his eyes off of you while Kix adjusts a few things on the tanks control panel. Satisfied, Kix returns to stand in front of it, and again glances between you and Crosshair.

“So when did that happen?” Kix asks.

“Don’t be stupid, you know how she got shot,” Crosshair snaps.

“That’s not what I meant,” Kix says, trying his best not to snap back at him. Crosshair takes a breath and steps backwards a few paces from the tank.

“That’s for her to tell you, not me,” he says.

“Fair enough; though I can’t say I’m surprised,” he says, making Crosshair look away from you and over at him.

“By what?” Crosshair says, an edge to his voice. Kix crosses his arms and raises an eyebrow at him.

“Did you already forget how you found us after Echo crashed?” he says. Crosshair huffs at him in annoyance.

“Of course not, what about it?” he says, turning to fully face the other man.

“I could see it on your face, while she held onto you,” Kix says. Crosshair stiffens, but says nothing, returning his focus to you.

“I could see it on her face too, you know,” Kix says.

“When?” Crosshair asks, curious in spite of himself.

“When she said you sounded like an angry loth cat,” Kix says. Crosshair doesn’t react to this, and a quiet minute passes before he sighs.

“How long will she be in there?” he asks quietly.

“At least three hours, maybe longer,” Kix says, double checking something on the tank’s control panel. “But someone will be checking in on her every ninety minutes to see how it’s progressing.”

Crosshair nods once at him, and Kix slips out of the curtained area without another word, leaving him alone with you. Crosshair spots a chair nearby and drags it over to your left side, against the tank, before sitting down and keeping a careful watch over you. He hates how helpless you look, floating there unconscious, and holds his hand to the glass near yours again.

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#my fics #series #echo #cross #tech

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9w1ft · 2 months

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I'm so upset. I need to pull back. It probably shouldn't be a big deal but I went through so many emotions getting this ticket. I thought I was never going to see her in concert. But honestly. At this point. If he ends up with there at mine, I think I would leave. It would ruin the whole thing. The music is what's real, Taylor. I'm coming to support that. To support YOU. And it honestly feels like a betrayal for the masquerade to extend to that. I wish you'd have known on the ticket. I wouldn't have put my savings in it.

maybe commiserating is the correct response and i am sorry that im taking it in a different direction because i get that sometimes that’s not what someone needs but if i can impart an idea, i think that if your heart is telling you to step back then by all means honor your heart and do so—and—if you find yourself returning or wanting to return, i think there might be a way of engaging with taylor that can work for you. i think it’s important to recognize that this has been a not ideal situation for sometime but to also recognize there are still good parts in here, and by good i mean that there are ways you can personally benefit from taylor’s work that will make your life better. and if you can recognize that there are parts that won’t ever work for you, and instead capture and focus in on the good parts that do, you can still become a better version of yourself through her work.

i used the word might because i recognize that the way we engage with public figures these days is a little bit different than in the past, i think, and by that i just mean that, i think more than ever we look to the public figures that we support as if they are extensions of our own conscience. in forming our identities growing up, i think more than ever people need an intense moral alignment with every last thing we decide to say that we enjoy, and there’s so much pressure, i think, to continuously curate and express what we enjoy to an infinite audience of people, in perpetuity.

i think it’s very hard to maintain this sort of consistency in one’s consumption and it’s so much work for very little benefit, and it can all be taken away from anyone in an instant. i just don’t think it’s any way to live, especially when i think it’s possible to just… let go of some things and allow yourself to pick and choose a little bit more.

i don’t say these things to invalidate your feelings and once again i’m sorry if it comes off insensitive.. i’ve been where you are. and i just hope that maybe, with a little tinkering of the way you utilize your time with taylor, there’s a way to make it work.

also on a more practical note.. i’m not sure if you’re there tonight or an upcoming night but, save for travis walking on stage, or you having a seat directly beside VIP, you’re really not going to notice or even think about who’s there at all. i just say this because, im about as crack of a detective as it gets when it comes to this meta narrative but even i get entirely swept up in the moment and forget to take pictures or check access points or look out for celebs or check twitter. it’s a concert and you’ll have the opportunity to scream and shout to 18 years of music that mean something to you, and i think you’ll get some good stuff out of it so, if you’re on the fence i’d say go anyway. i think it’ll be worth it.

#maybe to put it another way— you don’t have to let taylor ruin taylor for you

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chaandkeeroshni · 1 year

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08.11.22

It has taken me so much effort, coming from Montreal to Toronto again, to lie down in drishti’s bed to be able to write.

I’ve been wanting to write since last week but depression kind of becomes a lump stuck in my being all the time. Off late, everything feels very very exhausting. I was dreading coming to Toronto and kept postponing until last moment because I was dreading travelling, I was dreading being on my own for 6 hours, with my thoughts.

I have been trying to do what I can for work. During times like this, working smart over working hard always helps. I’ve been sleeping extra, taking my breaks, I work little but I make sure it’s the work that truly matters. Got one major project together in one place, arranged a call with an investor, arranged a potential partnership for non profit. I’m trying but work also feels exhausting, everything does. The only thing I feel like doing is sleeping on and on. On the brighter side, sleeping no longer feels dark and gloomy and no longer filled with anxiety, whenever I’m sleeping I feel like I’m healing and reaching acceptance.

Broke out crying on my bus ride from Montreal to Toronto; I haven’t cried about all this in a bit even though I felt like I had to. I was dreading crying about this. But I just couldn’t help it. I let the emotions come to me, see an ending as an ending, and just cry cry cry about it. And it helped. Once I was done crying, I felt relieved. Lighter. Mourning done. Passed.

I fought with my mom in the bus. Then, I reached Toronto, got out of union station. Somehow, I always come here as someone trying to hold herself together. I’ve never come here as someone who was still with him. At least, I don’t have the association with Toronto as a city where I’d text him and share the experience with him. But anyways, I stepped out and smoked a cigarette and this homeless lady came and asked for a cigarette and I was happy to give her one.

Coming here has been nice. I sat down with Isabella and drishti. We put frozen lasagne in the oven and made chai. Then we talked and talked in the living room. Eventually ended up playing Bollywood songs which are always humouring the strongest grief and heartbreak and it kind of helped. I danced on and told drishti this is actually the best therapy I’ve tried in a while.

Sara messaged me, she always checks in on me and gives me the best advice and strength. And sometimes I feel kind of weak and I can’t fathom Mujhe ho kya gaya hai. I was someone who didn’t let anything no matter how big get to her and now I flinched because of a short guy with hardly any mental ability to get through any situation. Someone who never knew how to stay. How has this been able to affect me this much, is still beyond me, maybe I’ll be able to understand one day. But when people who are thriving after breakup from 5 year long relationships try and give me strength, it sometimes feels absurd kay Mujhe kya hogaya hai.

But anyways, having those support systems helps. She said endings like these are like getting past a terrible car accident, you are in your own car and you HAVE to keep driving your own car yourself but you somehow can’t because something terrible happened while driving and now you’re struggling driving your own car. And in so many ways, it does feel like that. I dread driving my own car; it demands so much strength. Part of me wants to take sleeping pills and sleep past this and wake up when this is all over. When I’ve already driven my car and have reached some stability. But that’s the thing, no? I can’t skip this stage. I gotta drive on and on.

Last week, Ali and I had the global non profit call together. We prepared together and he had taken me for dinner 2 days before. While preparing for the presentation, he’d sneakily tease me and say “let me see if the bumble girl replied” to see how I’d react and I’d react the way you react to a stupid child and then get them back to work. On the presentation day, he was very visibly nervous and he told me so. I told him it’d be okay and in fact fun and we should see it as an opportunity to get to know people and their work. He said yeah maybe but I could see the nervousness on his face, and he had dressed up in formal for the presentation. It was lowkey endearing. He was doing all this with me, for me. All catered to the vision im passionate about, working for women around the globe. After the call he said he was very happy and I told him I was too. I sent him a Starbucks gift card bantering for being a basic boy but also telling him I appreciate him for being a tolerable male ally. For standing besides me while I do this, while I try to make this happen.

When I discuss excerpts from Sylvia Plath’s journals with Ali, he writes whole essays to respond to me. When I speak to him, he always looks down trying to focus on and process everything I’m saying. He asks me for advice before taking big decisions. Today, I was depressed and he texted me saying he missed baking and I invited him for baking and then he started flirting in his quirky ways again, asking me what ingredients I wanted. I said I only like ingredients whose only customer is me, and then he said don’t worry I’ll find something that’s for you only. And I blushed so much I had to leave the living room and go inside the bedroom.

i’m nervous about this.

Anyways, sometimes the gist of everything I’m feeling is that it overwhelms me I’m navigating multiple realities at a time. I’m here for my best friend’s birthday, working from home I have a date in an hour and half with a Toronto boy, tomorrow I’m attending Sara’s convocation because she has no friends or family in the city. Thursday I travel back. On weekend, I have plans which make me nervous and next week I travel back to Pakistan.

All of this keeps me on my toes and busy and life is exciting and in a way it helps me battle depression but sometimes my lifestyle is so so so overwhelming. I just wanna pause and breathe and find stability somewhere. I remember trying to find it in danyal and how that drove me further insane so maybe I shouldn’t. But I want to. Somewhere. Somewhere else. I want to be able to call something home, that no matter what happens, there’s home to return to.

How do people survive when home is where the pain is?

I don’t want a life like that. I don’t want home where there’s pain. I wanna find healing at home, I wanna find love at home, friendship, consistency and stability. an ally who stands besides me as I do the boldest things. A companion who holds me strong as I quiver. I don’t want to quiver because of home. I never wanna go back there again, never.

Anyways, writing always always helps. I need to start getting ready for my date. I don’t know what I’m expecting out of it, but it is what it is. For some reason, I do want to see this man and for some reason I also don’t. But I’m gonna do it.

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dailyaudiobiblechronological · 1 year

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1/27/2023 DAB Chronological Transcription

Genesis 43-45

Welcome to the Daily Audio Bible Chronological, I'm China. Today is the 27th day of January. Welcome. So great to be here with you today. Today we continue on in our story, a very heated story. What is going to happen next? Well, we continued on today with Genesis, chapters 43 through 45 and this week with in the Common English Bible.

Commentary:

The famine. Yeah, no joke when Jacob is saying, this is too much for me. This is a great story of reconciliation and redemption through the ward. And the heart posture that Joseph has is so impressive to me and so inspiring and encouraging because he has been enslaved, he has been a prisoner wrongfully. And now he is over charge of the harvest and the plentiful. And in this time of famine, which was a great stressor on all those surrounding towns and countries, and he is put in charge of this, which is a very big deal. I don't even know the equivalent of how he could translate that in today's time, but he's got a really big job. And all of this is because his heart has been faithfully with the Lord and I'm so impressed by that. But then how he's handling his brothers, not just one who's done him wrong, but ten who have done him wrong, and ten men, and then you reveal yourself to them and his responses, don't be too hard on yourselves because what you meant for evil, actually the Lord used it for good. I don't know how many times I've had that heart response. Do something much less on the scale that he has experienced. And so that encourages my heart to move into a place of forgiveness and quick forgiveness. And I think sometimes we, yes, feel your emotions, and I'm not sure what emotion he felt, but he was weeping a couple of different times. And so you can tell that he's overcome by emotion and what emotions those were, I'm not sure, but I feel like we could all have some pretty solid guesses. But then for him to say, don't be too hard on yourselves. I know that you meant this for evil, but the Lord used it for good. And now I'm in a place where I can make sure that you guys are taken care of and make sure that our father's taken care of. And again, that is the forgiveness heart motive. His heart is rooted in forgiveness and it's not in this. I'm going to let you suffer. I'm going to let you I'm going to give you this silent treatment. I'm going to make you feel my wrath. Walk on eggshells around me. I feel like sometimes you're like, okay, I'm going to forgive you in like three years or in like 30 minutes or whatever. And I'm not sure that I believe that. The Lord has said hate. We are called to forgive, forgive each other as Christ Jesus has forgiven us. And in some parts of scripture. It says that if we don't forgive, our sins aren't forgiven. And so I think the timeline of how we forgive is important. I used to think maybe it wasn't, but okay, I'm going to forgive you eventually, but not right now. Whereas Joseph here, he's feeling his emotions. Like, I'm learning the art of regulating your emotions and to do the breathwork and to really feel what you need to feel, kind of let those emotions pass through your body and regulate back to yourself and then to make decisions or talk after you're back to being regulated. And so I feel like Joseph going and stepping aside for a second and feeling what he needs to feel and crying and getting it all out and then coming back and then having these discussions feels like very similar to regulating your emotions, coming back and then being able to have a sound mind to respond with. But anyways, I'm learning that. I'm seeing the value in it and watching how differently conversations go when you respond from a regulated response. And I think that these are psychological, therapeutic practices, but I think that if the capital C Church can really grasp hold of these things, we know so much about ourselves and realize that the Lord is in those things as well. And he's not asking us to do things that he wasn't willing to do, but also that he wouldn't give us the tools to learn to do, if that makes sense. Because sometimes we can say through gritted teeth, I forgive you, or we can say, I forgive you, and it doesn't really do anything. Or we're like, waiting for forgiveness to come on, like an emotion that takes over our body, and we're like, oh, I don't have to do any hard work, I just forgive, like, hallelujah, which I feel like can happen. I've recently experienced that where I was like, yeah, I feel like maybe I should have what's the word I'm looking for? Like a grudge. But actually I just release you. I just release you. I forgive you, and I'm moving on. And I was kind of like, okay, I wasn't expecting that. I was expecting to be upset for a little bit longer, but I think so. I think that sometimes it does happen, and I think other times we have to actively choose to forgive and to release and yeah, I don't know. I just think that there's a lot to learn in the forgiveness realm, but also a lot to learn and how to regulate ourselves. And so I'm learning the art of, like, deep belly breathing. Just a quick how. I mean, if we're if we're going to heal our bodies through, like, mind, body, spirit, then we can't neglect the body, right? Like, we can pray for a sound mind and renew our mind, but then we also need to do some practical things, too, is personally what I believe. And so if we do like, deep belly breathing that helps regulate our levels of serotonin, because there's more serotonin in our gut than there is in our brain. And so those neurotransmitters have to be firing at all cylinders. And so it's just important that we kind of have the whole picture. And I think once we have the whole picture, we realize that we're actually not crazy and realize, oh, there's just a missing step here. And so I don't know how those two fit together, but I feel like the host here was inviting me to sharing that. So I think if anything, let's take a few deep belly breaths. And so this is a good practice that I have been doing. If you put your hand on your stomach and put one on your chest, and then you can take like a deep breath and feel your stomach pull in. Like if you inhale, you feel it pull in and then exhale through your mouth and you can feel it expand. And really what that does is you're focusing on your breath. And when you focus on your breath, your mind can wander, but just gently bring it back. And when you focus on that, you can feel a difference in how centered you are versus a charged response to things. And so if we can practice this a few times a day, but then especially in those situations where it's like, oh, here's all ten of my brothers, here's my revenge. I'm selling you, I'm selling you, I'm selling you, I'm going to slaughter you, I'm going to blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, you again. I think that he responded because he had a solid relationship with the Lord and he really understood who the Lord was. But then I also think he did some practical steps of regulating his emotions before he responded. So I think that that is something that we miss, we overlook, and there's value in it. So take a few minutes deep belly breathe, and then we'll pray.

Prayer:

Father, I thank you that you know us, you have created us in Your image and you have called us good. And God, I pray that the words that Joseph spoke would reign true over ourselves, not to be too hard on ourselves, whether that is something that we receive over ourselves or something that we extend to others and that we would just be reminded that sometimes what man means for evil, the Lord works out for good. He intends for good. And I thank You, Lord, that you are the only one who can redeem you're, the only one who can restore you're the only one who can save. And so I pray that we would grasp that, that we would know that truth and that we would carry that with us. I think there's so much authority in the understanding of that. And I also pray God, that when we have those scenarios arise, because they will come. There may be one that happens later today. I pray that we would remember our breath, that we would remember our breath work to be able to pause and to invite you into the moment and just to focus on our breathing and remember that we are called to renew our mind and to renew our spirit. But we can't do that on our own. We have to ask you to do that. And I thank you that you're always willing and you're always able. And so I just thank you for this story, those little things that remind us that you are a God who cares. You are a God who knows his people and what they need. And I thank you that even just the little details today of the story, even Joseph having a moment to grieve or to cry or to process, to feel what he needed to feel and then come back and respond, god, I thank you that there's so much wisdom in that. And so Lord, I pray that you would remind us the value in the pause before the response. Lord, I just thank you for your word and it's in your name we pray. Amen.

Announcements:

Dailyaudiobible.com is our website. That is a place of connection, so be sure to check that out. You can also go to facebook.comdailyauudiobiblechronological. That's another great place to see what's happening here in the community and other people ask for prayer in there or have deeper thoughts about Scripture and to process it and talk about it there. So you can do so you can go to that page and click like and be a part of the community that's happening through there. And if you have prayer requests and things that we as a community can come alongside of you and and encourage you, pray over you, you can call it 800-583-2164. And that is all for today. I'm China. I love you. I'll be waiting for you here tomorrow.

Community Prayer Line:

Good morning DABC. This is TN and NC. First time I'm calling this year. Just like everyone else calling in. Thousands of us have been welcoming all the new members on the DAB and the DABC just want to say you've come to an awesome ministry. It's not just a podcast, it is a ministry. And you hopefully will remain a part of our family because we love all of you. We want to hear your prayers and we do pray for everyone. I just heard Tony and suffix call and I've been meaning to let you know that I had posted on Facebook DABC praying for someone else. And someone responded to me thinking I was you because my name is Tanya also. And of course, you know on Facebook you got your full name. But in any event, please know that I and many others are praying for you, praying for your family also. Heard you ask for a special prayer for Cameron. Certainly pray for all of your family and all of our children and grandchildren who are in college because I have three. Praise God. We've heard a lot of heart wrenching prayers already this year with a lot of circumstances that just aren't to the best. But then all of a sudden we get to hear from God, small and Peter, which gives us a kiss kiss and a lightness within the prayers. God bless all of you. Stick with this. Remember, you are to pursue God. As long as you have breath, you will never arrive, but you will always be able to learn and grow. God bless each and every one of you and you will hear from me again. I think this is my fifth year coming up in April. So to God be the glory for that and certainly for all of you. Thanks, Brian, Jill, China. Love you madly. Amen.

Good morning, DABC. This is Tonya calling from Suffolk. Today is Sunday, January 22. I just want to give you guys an update on my son Cameron finances for school. I was asking for prayer. He attends Norfolk State University down here in Norfolk, Virginia. And I'm just going to say God is great, he is greatly seen. Praise. All things have been worked out for the glory of God. My son finances has been taken care of for this semester. Even his housing is just covered 100%. So once again, I just wanted to give you guys an update and I had no doubt that God would not do exactly what he said he would do. And once again, as trust and believer in just going forward his rest of the years while he's in college that God has already opened up doors, he will be overflowed with abundance finances to allow him to continue his studies in school. And I just want to let you guys know he is going for psychology, he wants to be a counselor and also he's working on his bachelor's right now. When that's complete, he wants to pursue his masters. So once again, I thank you guys so much for the prayers and I just love you all. Just continue being covered. You guys have a wonderful day.

Hey DAB family, I am begging you to stand with me in prayer. I have recently become aware that my good friend, I'm going to call her Taylor, has been a victim of sex trafficking. And the more I learn, the bigger and more horrific it all becomes. This is apparently human trafficking prevention month and yet I have never heard a single mention of it anywhere. So I'm asking the DAB community to please, please pray against this evil. Pray for deliverance, pray for safety, for protection. I know what's going on in my community. Most people are completely unaware and yet it's just horrible. So pray for spiritual freedom, pray for protection, pray for changed hearts and please pray for my friend and for me. Thanks.

Hi. DABC family. This is Sarah. I've been a part of this community since China started it. I think this is the 6th year, if I'm counting right. And I really loved the mother daughter tag team the last year. And no all enjoy it again. I don't call in hardly ever, but I am indeed prayer and intervention. My husband and I have known each other for nine and a half years and been married for just over six. He battled bipolar and depression and it was something that, before I met him, I had never experienced firsthand in this way. Not firsthand through him. For the most part. It had been pretty even keel, pretty easy. There were moments here and there over the time, but not bad. But the last six months have been a true challenge for him and in turn for me. Just not knowing what to do, how to do it, what to say, when to say it, how to say it. Anytime we try to discuss it, I just ask questions out of I don't understand and it turns into a fight. He's trying to work on getting different medications because whatever he's been taking is not working. His anxiety is through the roof, which is making me extremely anxious as well. And we just need prayer. We have to go to his daughter's wedding in Australia in two weeks and both of us are on edge about the thought of that. Please pray for us, family. Thank you.

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petersspidey · 3 years

Text

Laundry Day

Summary: Y/N needs help carrying her laundry down to the laundry room and Bucky steps in to save the day. But he also has a load of his own ;)

Warnings: a lot of smut

Word Count: 3154 (its so long wtf)

MASTERLIST

Sometimes you hated Tony.

Like when he was overly cocky, and almost ruining your missions but somehow coming out the hero. Or when he tells the team something you didn't want all of them to know.

But you have never hated him more than when he put the laundry in the basement of the Avengers compound. You argued with him when he was first building it. He put your room on the top floor in the furthest possible wing from the laundry and unlike almost all of the Avengers you did not have super strength. So carrying your laundry across the entire building and down eight flights was not exactly easy.

So every two weeks you would spend 15 minutes just getting your dirty laundry from your room down to the laundry room, cursing Tony's name every time.

So there you were, the second Sunday of every month leaving your room, with an overflowing basket of laundry in your hand. As soon as you opened your door it felt like you ran into a brick wall. You toppled backward landing on your ass, and you had completely dropped your basket. Your clothes had spilled everywhere.

You sighed, and looked up.

"Sorry, Y/N." Bucky said

He bent down, starting to help you pick up your clothes.

"It's ok," you sighed, joining him in placing everything back into the basket.

"What were you doing standing outside my room anyway?" you asked

"I wasn't standing outside your room … I just happened to be walking past right as you opened your door."

You laughed, "ok Buck. Whatever you say."

He huffed in frustration. You always knew how to get under his skin, but he also knew how to get under yours.

Bucky helped you pick up the last few items of your laundry, when he held up something in front of your face.

You black lace thong. Your eyes widened, and you quickly snatched it from his hands.

You quickly threw the last things into your basket, and stood up.

"Well, thanks for the help. I gotta go."

You tried to get out of there as quickly as possible. Your cheeks burning red over the fact that Bucky just had your dirty underwear in his hand. But, your basket once again held you back. You lifted it, but had to walk slowly, barely able to see over the top of the mountain of clothes.

"Do you need some help?" Bucky asked, watching you walk away

"Nope. I'm good," you yelled back.

Bucky eyed you for a second, before turning to walk away. You continued down the hall, slowly making your way to the elevator. After barely making it anywhere. You placed the basket down for a moment, resting your arms. You stretched your back, and before you could bend down again to scoop up your basket Bucky was standing beside you, reaching down to grab it.

"I said I didn't need help," you said

"Yeah, and as much fun as it was watching you struggle to carry this and need to take a break five seconds in, I figured I'd just lend you a hand," he said

"Well it's not my fault I'm not a supersoldier like you," you muttered

Bucky chuckled and started walking down the hall toward the elevator.

"You carry this by yourself every week? How do you go through so many clothes?" he asked

"Well, every other week. But, yes."

"And! This is not an abnormal amount of clothes for two weeks, thank you very much." you continued

"You know, if you did laundry every week you might not have such an issue getting down to the laundry room." Bucky said, smirking at you.

You rolled your eyes, "Whatever, Barnes."

"You're just upset because you know I'm right."

As you approached the elevator, you pressed the button and Bucky put your laundry down.

"Thanks, I think I've got it from here," you said.

The elevator doors opened, and once again, before you could grab your basket Bucky managed to get a hold of it first.

"Really, Bucky. It's ok I'll be fine from here."

"Are you forgetting about the long hallway downstairs?" He said, stepping onto the elevator with your clothes.

You huffed, and followed him on.

"I'm a big girl. I can do it myself."

The doors closed and you began to descend.

"Oh don't get your little lacy panties in a twist, I wasn't doing anything else I don't mind giving you a hand." Bucky said, smirking at you, knowing exactly how you'd react.

Your face became red again.

"Don't talk about my underwear."

"If you don't want me talking about your underwear maybe you should move the hot pink g-string that you have sitting at the top of your basket."

You lightly gasp, and reach over, pulling the pair off the top and shoving them down the side of your basket.

Bucky chuckled again. Knowing he was embarrassing you.

The elevator stopped, and you both stepped off into the basement, heading down the long hall to the laundry room.

"You must've done something to make Tony mad if he put your room so far from the laundry."

"I'm fully convinced he just likes to cause me problems. He probably has FRIDAY watching me on the cameras. I do not doubt one bit that he laughs at me hauling this downstairs twice a month."

Bucky laughed at your statement.

You smiled back at him. You don't see him smile much. It was a good change.

You turn the corner with Bucky. You could see the laundry room door at the end of the hall now. The two of you walk silently until you reach the door. You open it, and Bucky walks in in front of you and places your basket full of clothes down in front of one of the washers.

"Thanks for helping me. Would've taken me twice as long to get down here if I was by myself."

"It's no problem. It's always fun to show off my strength to a pretty lady."

"Oh so I'm a pretty lady?" you teased

Bucky blushed.

You smirked, and opened the washing machine lid. You began loading your clothes in. Bucky stood near you, leaning on the dryer right beside.

"You don't have to wait down here with me," you told him

"I figured I'd just wait and walk back upstairs with you."

"It's really ok, Buck. I usually just hang out down here until my loads are done. It's only a 30 minute cycle."

"Well maybe I'll just hang out down here with you…" Bucky said, as if he was waiting for your permission.

"Sure, I guess. If you really want to."

You filled up one machine, and threw the detergent in, shutting the lid. You moved over to another machine and began putting in a second load.

You heard Bucky chuckling, and turned around to look at him.

"What?" you questioned

"You have so many clothes that you have to use two washing machines." He said, shaking his head.

You rolled your eyes, "Whatever Barnes. It's because unlike you, I don't wear the same Henley's and jeans every day."

"No, you wear different coloured thongs every day." he teased

You finished placing all the laundry in the machine, and left your basket on the floor.

You walked back toward where Bucky was standing and jumped up onto one of the empty machines, sitting on the lid.

"You really just sit down here on top of a dryer waiting by yourself? You know there's a table and chairs right there." Bucky said

"Usually, yeah. Sometimes I bring a book down, but it's nice and quiet down here…" you started

"Well, usually I'll sit on top of one of the washing machines that I'm using, and not the empty dryer," you added, knowing exactly what you were insinuating.

Bucky's eyes shot up to you. "What?" he asked, thinking he hadn't heard you right.

"You heard me." you confirmed

"Well, alright. So why aren't you sitting on one of those today?"

"Well, usually only something I do while I'm down here alone."

"Don't be shy, doll."

Something about the way Bucky said doll, made you squirm. You hesitated for a second before you got off the dryer, and walked toward the machine that you had just turned on, climbing on top of it. You sat, letting your legs hang over the edge, eyes on Bucky.

The vibrations from the machine were shooting through you, pulsating right to your center. You closed your eyes, enjoying the feeling. You could hear Bucky walking closer, he lightly spread your legs and stood in between them. You opened your eyes. Bucky's face was inches from yours. He leaned in closer, taking either side of your face in his hands. You expected his metal hand to be cold against your face, but it was almost as warm as his other.

He looked you in the eyes, before bringing your face towards his, pressing a sloppy kiss against your mouth (ok but think Endings, Beginnings kiss - his character with Shailene Woodly). You leaned into the kiss, opening your mouth more, allowing him to slide his tongue inside. You wrapped your legs around his back, pulling him as close to you as you possibly could. The vibrations from the machine, still sending pulses right to your core.

You could already feel yourself getting more wet by the second. Bucky's mouth on yours mixed with the feeling of the machine below you. You needed more. You ran your hands down Bucky's body, reaching underneath his shirt to feel his skin. Bucky ran his hands over you, one of his fingers grazing against you hard nipple poking through your shirt. You moaned into his kiss.

Bucky slid his hands under your shirt and began lifting it. You raised your arms over your head, allowing him to take your shirt off. You broke your kiss as he lifted your shirt over your head. He stared at your bare chest as he threw your shirt to the side. You pulled him close, shoving your lips back against his.

His hands roamed your bare back, holding you tight against him. He began kissing down your neck, toward your chest. You leaned back on your hands, allowing him easier access to your hard nipples.

You moaned, and allowed your head to fall back as he swirled his tongue around your breast. His hands fumbled with the buttons on your jeans, undoing the zipper. He pulled away, and urged you to lift up your bottom so he could rip your jeans from your legs.

He tossed them aside, and looked at you sitting in only your underwear. He smirked, seeing how wet they were.

"Granny panties?" he questioned

"Shut up, all my good pairs are in the laundry." you said, taking your panties off yourself, leaving you completely exposed. He stood, looking at you, enjoying the sight. You looked down and saw his cock fighting against the zipper of his jeans.

Bucky groaned before touching you.

"Lie down," he ordered, placing one hand on your chest, getting you to lie your back completely flat on the machine.

You twitched as your bare back hit the cold metal of the washer, before settling in.

You looked down at Bucky, just as he was bending over placing a long lick against your slit. You moaned loudly, not expecting him to do that. He looked up at you as he placed another lick, taking in your wetness.

He saw the look of ecstasy on your face and took it as a sign to keep going. He dove into your pussy, face first. You gasped, and arched your back, only pressing your wetness deeper into Bucky's face. Bucky teased you, leaving small, gentle strokes along your clit.

You wrapped your legs tight around his head, "stop teasing me," you begged

You could feel him smirk, "anything for you, doll."

Bucky began pressing his tongue harder against your clit. Moving it up, down, and in circles. You moaned loudly, your grip tightening on his hair.

The vibrations from the machine and his tongue on you were too much. You began thrusting up against his face. You wanted nothing more than him inside of you.

"Buck, please." you moaned

Bucky brought one of his hands up toward your breast. He kneaded it in his hand as his tongue dove around your pussy. He flicked your hard nipple between his fingers. You cried out in pleasure. You could feel your orgasm building.

"Don't stop, i'm so close," you whined out

Bucky didn't stop. He continued sucking on your clit until you could feel your walls come crashing down. You pulled on his har, and tighten your legs around his head as he continued through your orgasm.

When you finally calmed down, you slowly let your grip on him go. You were panting, lying back on the still vibrating washing machine, staring at the ceiling, taking in that feeling of ecstasy.

Bucky stood up and stared at you. He loved the sight of you. You were panting, cheeks red, a total mess. All for him.

Bucky looked around, thinking of how and where he was going to fuck you. He eyed the table.

"Get up, doll." he told you

You sat up, breathless, "Why,"

"Machine's too tall, beautiful. Can't fuck you up there."

Just hearing Bucky say that made your pussy twitch. He placed either hand on your hips and helped you down. You stood, leaning against the washing machine as Bucky began undressing in front of you.

He tossed his shirt to the side, and began taking his pants down. He stood in front of you in only his underwear.

"Take them off," you begged

Bucky gave you a smug look before pulling them down as well.

You moaned, just at the sight of him. You hadn't realized that the supersoldier serum would affect that part of him as well.

You moved toward him, taking his huge cock in your hand. You ran your finger over his tip, precum already leaking out

"Fuck," he muttered

"That's the idea," you said.

Bucky gripped your hips tight, shoving you toward the table in the corner of the room. He lifted you up and sat you down on the edge.

"Lean back, so I can shove my dick in you." he ordered

You obeyed. Lying flat on the table, bringing your heels up so they were resting on the table as well. You kept your eyes on Bucky, he traced his finger up and down between your folds. You twitched at the smallest touch.

"Please," you whined

Bucky grinned at you, before taking his cock in his hand, and lightly brushing it up against you.

Bucky lined himself up with your entrance, and slowly slid inside. You cried out in pleasure the deeper he got. You felt so tight with his massive cock. You watched Bucky push the rest of himself in. He shot his head back, mouth open, moaning loudly.

"Fuck, you feel so good," he said breathlessly

You both stayed still, taking in the feeling of Bucky stretching you out. He pulled you closer to him, taking either of your legs and putting them over his shoulders. When he pulled you tight against him, you could feel him get even deeper inside of you.

Bucky slowly began to rock in and out of you. The feeling overwhelming. You couldn't hold in your moans. Never had it felt so good to have someone so close and so deep inside of you.

You shot your hand down to your clit, moving it slowly between your fingers as Bucky began to pick up his pace. You already knew it wasn't going to take much for you to come again, especially with how Bucky was moving in and out of you.

Bucky slowed his pace, sliding out of you, and then pushing back in hard. You circled your clit harder as he continued thrusting in and out.

He pushed in, and you moaned hard, arching your back.

"Right there, don't stop." you said

Bucky kept his pace, thrusting in and out. He knew you were close to coming again.

"Such a good girl," he said to you

Hearing Bucky call you that was enough. You circled your clit twice more before your walls came crashing down. Your other hand gripped the side of the table.

"Oh my god,"

Your pussy twitched around his dick, but he didn't stop moving. He continued fucking you through your orgasm.

You groaned, knowing if he kept going like this another orgasm wouldn't be far behind. Both your arms were spread, gripping different ends of the table. Bucky brought his hand down to your clit. Running his thumb over it, over, and over, and over again.

Bucky rocked his hips into you, thrusting hard and fast. You moaned every time you felt him hit deep inside of you, his thumb still running over your clit. Your walls clenched against his dick once more. That was exactly what he needed. Bucky threw his head back, pulling himself out of you, spurting his come all over your stomach.

Bucky stood in front of you, letting your legs fall from his shoulders. you were still lying back on the table. Both of you stayed silent, trying to catch your breath.

The washing machine began to sing.

"Guess you got three loads done today," Bucky joked, cracking a small grin, looking down at you.

"Oh my god." you said, rolling your eyes at his awful joke.

Bucky held out his hand to you, offering to help you off the table. You grabbed his hand, and stood up. Your faces were only a few inches from each other.

"We should probably clean you up," Bucky said, not taking his eyes off of you.

You sighed, as Bucky turned away to grab you a towel from across the room.

You cleaned yourself off, and you both got dressed again. Bucky stayed with you as you switched your laundry from the washing machines into the dryers, 100% eyeing your ass as you bent over.

"Ever sit on top of the dryer?" Bucky joked.

"Too hot," you answered, laughing slightly.

You walked toward Bucky, he was sitting in one of the chairs at the table. He grabbed your hand pulling you close to him. You sat down on his lap, and he gripped your face with one of his hands, placing a long kiss on your lips.

"Maybe I should start helping you with your laundry every week," he stated

"Every other week," you corrected.

"No, darling. Every week."

#Peterspidey #sebastianstan #the falcon and the winter soldier #Sebastian stan smut #Bucky barnes smut #Bucky barnes x reader #Bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnes fanfiction #the winter soldier smut #the winter soldier fanftiction #the winter soldier imagine #the falcon and the winter soldier smut #Sebastian stan imagine #seb stan smut #Sebastian stan x reader #mcu #smut

5K notes · View notes

midgardianweasley · 3 years

Note

hiii i love your fics so much omg! anyway, i have a request that i've been daydreaming about that haha: nat and r get into a really big fight about smth (anything but cheating pls my heart won't be able to take that) and r kind of shuts down, and wanda & carol become super protective of her and follow her everywhere making sure she's ok. (and they're also glaring at nat any chance they get) but then nat comes into r's room one night and apologizes and they make up and snuggle and its soft hours

thank you so much! and of course lovely! here you go<33

Priorities

Natasha Romanoff x fem!reader

Summary: Natasha has been missing date nights, leaving Y/N embarrassed for the final time. When confronted, an argument unfolds, but can they come back from it?

Word Count: 4.6k

Warnings: some swearing, some self-neglect

Message/ask if you’d like to be added to the taglist! <3

“Another drink, miss?” The waiter in a smart, black tux asked you for the second time this evening, a part of you felt that it was out of pity as you sat alone at a table for two, and had been for the last two hours.

You were supposed to be meeting your girlfriend tonight for date night, you got all dressed up, makeup applied and hair styled perfectly, which had taken forever, only to be stood up. You wouldn’t have overly minded if this was a first occurrence, you would’ve brushed it off and rescheduled for another night. Which is what you had done, two missed date nights ago.

This was your third night of sitting alone in a crowded, candlelit restaurant as couples around you glanced over with a sympathetic gaze, which had only made you feel worse. Your girlfriend should be here. ‘Natasha should be here’, you thought. You looked up at the kind waiter, giving him a gentle smile before shaking your head.

“No, thank you. I think I'm calling it a night.” You spoke as you hurried to gather your things and get out of there as soon as possible, trying to hold back tears that you refused to let fall, not in front of all of these strangers. You hated this. You hated feeling so exposed. So vulnerable. You couldn’t help but feel anger bubble inside of you, thoughts of Natasha being the only thing currently plaguing your mind, most along the lines of; ‘What was her excuse this time?’ ‘Who is she with instead?’, but, there was one in particular that you couldn’t help but focus on.

‘She promised.’

You hadn’t realised you were crying until you were in the taxi, catching a glimpse of yourself in the rearview mirror when the driver had adjusted it slightly to see the cars behind you, in the process, you’d also caught her eyebrows raise in concern and it wasn’t long before she started conversation.

“You okay back there?”

You laughed somewhat bitterly, but it wasn’t towards her. “Nothing I can't handle.”

Your response didn’t seem to settle her worry as she turned quickly and shot you a sad smile before returning her eyes to the road.

“Boy troubles?”

“Girl.” You rubbed your face, trying to rid yourself of any tear stains that may be lingering and messing up your once really pretty makeup. Not that it really mattered at this point.

“Ah, been there.” She held up her left hand, showing you the shimmering diamond on her finger. “The wife and I have had our fair share of arguments and fallouts, some of them included a situation like this one.”

“Crying in the backseat of a taxi?”

“Crying in the backseat of a taxi.” She laughed lightly, making you smile for the first time tonight.

“It had always worked out though, we’ve never been stronger.”

“Congratulations.” You looked towards the woman “I hope I could be so lucky.” You mumbled, though still loud enough for her to hear. You were mad at Natasha, more disappointed really, but you still loved her, dangerously so. She could stand you up for another 50 dates, and you’d still be head over heels. Angry, but your love would never falter.

“I’m sure you will be. If there’s one thing I've learned over the years, it’s that things have a way of falling into place eventually.”

Pondering her words, you looked out of the car window and noticed that you were pulling up to Stark Tower. It wasn’t long before the car came to a complete stop, the woman turning round to you and beginning to speak again.

“You’ll be okay. It’s obvious you love her, okay? Speak to her. I’m sure it’ll be alright.” She looked at you with nothing but kindness in her eyes, which you did your best to return with a smile. You reached into your purse, handing her the money owed, plus a tip.

“Thank you for the help.”

“Don’t worry about it, go get her.” She winked as you got out of the car and watched her drive away, quickly taking yourself inside to avoid freezing to death as the cold wind blew harshly. Kicking your heels off, you set off with one task at hand. Talk to Nat.

__________________________

“Hey, have any of you guys seen Nat?” You addressed some members of the team who were hanging out in the Kitchen, fixing themselves a snack or just conversing with one another. The second they looked up and took in their appearance, you could’ve sworn their faces paled and saddened slightly as if they knew what had happened.

“I think I saw her head off to train a while ago, but I'm not sure if she’s still there.” Carol replied, her face morphing into one of seriousness. She knew about the missed dates, having found you one night looking completely defeated in one of your nicest dresses and heels. She, alongside Wanda, who had found you both later that night, had spent their night comforting you and reassuring you that she probably hadn’t meant it. They didn’t know what to do, they’d never seen you look so sad before, no matter how much you told them it was okay, the pang in their chest for their best friend hadn’t ceased.

You nodded, quietly thanking Carol and wandered off in search for your girlfriend.

It didn’t take long, she was still training when you’d walked into the gym, sweat practically pouring off of her. Your heart softened briefly when you saw her, her fiery red hair tied back into a ponytail with loose strands all over the place, wearing a black t-shirt, grey sweatpants and a deadpan face as she attacked the dusty punching bag with such force that you’re surprised it hasn’t flown off of the chains yet.

She hadn’t noticed you had walked in, still giving all of her focus to her punches. Maybe she just hadn’t heard you?

“Hi Nat.”

Nothing.

“Nat”

All you could hear was the furious rattling of chains, still not getting a response from the redhead. With a sigh, you decided to try another approach. You stepped closer to her, still keeping a little distance, and leaned forward to tap her shoulder, instantly grabbing her attention. She flung herself around, arm still in midair, her closed fist almost coming into contact with your face.

You don’t know what you expected when she turned around and finally acknowledged your presence, but you definitely didn’t expect to be met with a scowl.

“Seriously? in the middle of training? I could’ve hit you.” She huffed as she turned back to her previous position.

“Sorry. I just wanted to come in and talk to you.”

“About?”

You paused, expecting her to look at you again, but she didn’t.

With a small sigh, you continued. “you missed date night again. I waited for you, but you were a no show.”

“Right, yeah, date night” she muttered, seeming to be unfocused as her eyebrows furrowed and her head kept darting around the room, looking anywhere but at you. “I’ll make the next one.”

“This is the third one you’ve missed this month.” You said firmly, wanting her to understand that this can’t keep happening, of course cancellations or rearrangements were bound to happen sometimes, but she’s just not showing up and then leaving you in the dark as to knowing why.

“I told you, i’ll make the next one.” She walked over to the bench, picking up her water bottle and taking a swig of water, looking directly at you, you look back at her and she just looks so, unbothered.

“I don’t believe you, Nat. You say you’ll make it up to me and then I sit there again, hoping that you’ll be there this time, but you don’t turn up. And now I come back and you’re just training. Could it not have waited? Was that seriously more important?” You raised your voice now, all the anger and frustration you’d felt earlier coming back up to the surface.

You just wanted an explanation, or something to justify how she was acting, but she gave you nothing, not even an attempt, only adding fuel to the fire.

“Why are you getting so annoyed? You should know better than anyone that this is my job.”

“I just explained that to you! Which is more than what you’re giving me right now.”

“Okay, fine, forgive me for not making everything about you for a minute.” She spat bitterly towards you, her temper starting to go as the discussion became more heated.

“Seriously? That’s how you’re seeing this?” If you weren’t so unbelievably irritated, you would’ve laughed at her response.

“You’re being selfish. So I missed a date or two, you’re blowing this out of proportion once again, it’s infuriating.” Selfish?

You raised both your hands, as if in surrender. It was one thing to ditch you, it was another thing to then insult you for speaking up about it. With a tight lipped smile, oozing with sarcasm, you decided that you’d had enough.

“I don’t need to listen to this.”

She shrugged her shoulders, adjusting the gloves she’d just put on. “Then don’t, i’m busy anyways.”. This time, you did laugh.

“What a fucking surprise.”. And with that, you turned on your heels and walked out, hearing the echo of punches fill the room once again, every one feeling like a punch to the stomach.

Maybe these are things falling into place, just not the place you’d hoped.

________________________

You were still in bed at noon the next day, unable to bring yourself to get up and face the world. You didn’t need to worry about anything in the confinement of your bed, even more so considering it wasn’t the bed you shared with Natasha.

After speaking, well, arguing with her last night, you went straight to your shared bedroom, gathered some clothes and your essentials, and slept in your old room that you used to stay in before the two of you started dating. It felt wrong. You always spent your nights with a warm feeling of love washing over you as your girlfriend pressed kisses all over your face, tangling your limbs together in the process.

It wasn’t the same. You felt cold, a type of cold that no heating or blankets could solve. You lacked a weight on your waist, fingertips stroking the skin that was exposed due to your top riding up slightly. Instead, the only comfort you had was the small bear you’ve kept for the las year. It was one that Natasha had given you after she won it at the funfair on your third date, and you could never bring yourself to part with it, remembering how happy she looked when she handed it to you, and the butterflies you felt just from seeing her look so pleased.

The bear was a little worn and torn now, it had been ripped in a couple of places, now replaced with a little sewn on patch of material that didn’t exactly match the shade of brown, and one of the eyes had started to fall off, but you liked that it was different. The assassin had tried to offer to replace it and buy you a new one, but you’d always refuse, insistent that you would keep that bear with you for the rest of time. Even now, when the two of you weren’t speaking, you still held onto it with a death-tight grip.

A knock on the door snapped you out of your daydream.

“Y/N, open up, It’s me.” A familiar voice shouted through. Carol.

“And me!” Wanda.

You heard some muttering outside of the door, something along the lines of Carol suggesting they break the door down, immediately being told that it was unnecessary by the Sokovian. Feeling pretty against the idea of having a doorway with no door, you called out for them.

“Guys, it’s unlocked.” You were quiet, but it was clear that they had heard you as the faint talking stopped altogether and you heard them walk in and shut the door behind them with a ‘click’.

Wanda was the first to approach you, kneeling down beside the bed so that she was at eye level with you, pulling the bed covers down a little to uncover more than your forehead. Once she could see your eyes and nose, she sent you a warm smile.

“Hi sleepy. It’s noon.”

“I know.” She frowned when she heard you speak, your voice raspy from your crying through the night. She hated seeing you like this, she loved both you and Natasha, and it hurt to see you so sad because of the woman you adored.

“We should go and eat something, it’ll help.”

“‘M not hungry.” You pressed your head further into the pillow, the last thing you wanted to do was eat, your stomach already feeling like it was twisting with every minute that passed.

“C’mon, i’ll make you your favourite.” the blonde winked, leaning against your wardrobe.

“Your special pancakes?”

“With extra whipped cream.” She sang, playfully trying to encourage you to leave the bed. You had to hand it to her, she knew you too well.

WIth a brief look between the two, you rubbed your eyes and threw the covers off dramatically, sighing and ensuring that they knew you didn’t approve of this. They knew you were joking, even if you weren’t, all they cared about was making sure you were okay, knowing that when you felt like this, being left alone allows you to neglect yourself and get really low. They don’t mind if you dislike them for a little while, as long as you are looked after.

“There we go! Well done.” Wanda stroked your back and led you towards the door where Carol held it open for you.

“No breaking it down behind my back.” You shot towards her, slightly amused at the guilty look on her face as she realised you’d heard her quarrel beforehand. Shaking her head, she nudged you out of the door, and the three of you made your way into the kitchen.

_______________________

Carol had stuck to her promise of preparing a sweet treat for you, a stack of fluffy pancakes sat in front of you, topped with whipped cream and two cherries on top. You ate slow, still a little cautious of how stable your stomach felt. You could see your two friends talk with one another, not wanting to stare and make you uncomfortable, but occasionally looking over silently to check in on you.

You were feeling pretty content as you sat at the counter, munching away with the two avengers for company. It was only when you heard a voice that you could recognise anywhere.

“Hi guys.”

Not daring to look up, you ket your eyes focused on the food in front of you, hoping that if you just stay quiet, you’ll be invisible to the human eye.

“Hey Nat.”

“Hi.”

Wanda and Carol replied, wary of any interaction between the pair of you that could unfold into something neither of you wanted or that would lead to any regrets.

You lifted your head slightly, able to see the daggers Carol was throwing at Nat, not impressed with her being in the room. You both had always been quite close, often talking about life before becoming superheroes that protect the planet, in her case, planets. In the process, she’d found herself having a soft spot for you, wanting to protect you from anything that could bring you harm. Which you were grateful for, but her glaring was terrifying sometimes, you were more grateful for the fact that her powers weren’t in her eyes, otherwise you would’ve definitely become single five minutes ago.

You could see Natasha out of the corner of your eye, she was filling up the bottle she used for when she was training, her eyes weren’t on what she was doing, instead, she was trying to subtly look up at you through the hood of her eyes. You subconsciously took the opportunity to really take in her appearance.

Her hair hadn’t been tended to since you last saw her, half of it was hanging out of her ponytail, most of it falling in front of her face. Her eyes looked glassy and bloodshot, like she had been crying recently and you could’ve sworn that was your t-shirt she was wearing. The sight sent a wave of sadness over you, wanting nothing more than to leap over the counter and pull her into your arms and tell her things were fine, that the two of you were fine. But you stayed seated, too nervous to make a move.

You didn’t know it, but she regretted speaking to you last night, instantly realising what she’d done after she came back to her room to find it empty and half of your stuff gone. She knew immediately where you’d gone and would’ve gone through to talk it through with you, but she didn’t think it would help. She wanted you to have your time and space before approaching the situation.

With that, she tightened the lid on her bottle, sent you an apologetic smile and walked out of the room, leaving behind an awkward atmosphere in her absence.

“You alright?” Wanda asked

“Yeah, yeah no I'm okay. I’m feeling a little tired though, I'll catch you guys in a bit, okay?” You stood from your seat, not giving either of the two a chance to stop you as you walked out and back to bed. What a day.

_______________________

Hours had gone by now and you were back wrapped up under your bed covers, still clinging onto your bear. You hadn’t bothered to change, you went straight to bed after walking in the door. You’d managed to get some sleep earlier, not a lot, but it was something.

You tossed and turned, trying to find any way of being comfortable so your body could rest and your mind could shut off, but it was deemed to be impossible. All you could think about was your argument with Nat, and how she looked so upset earlier. The thought alone triggered the waterworks again, this time, you didn’t even attempt to stop them.

Only a couple of minutes had passed before there was yet again, another knock on your door. You rolled your eyes, really not wanting any more visitors, you were grateful for the help, but you really wanted to be alone.

“Guys, I’m fine! It’s late, get some sleep.” You called out, waiting to hear retreating footsteps, but they never came. Huh. That’s weird? You brushed it off quickly, assuming that it must’ve just been too quiet to hear, which you wouldn’t put past you due to all the sniffling you’ve been doing in an attempt to silence your crying.

You were wrong. The person at your door hadn’t walked away. They also weren’t Wanda or Carol. Instead, it was who you least expected to be in your room at god knows what time at night after the events that had unfolded recently.

“Hi.” The redhead whispered, worrying that if she spoke any louder, you’d be able to hear her voice shake with nerves, or the huge lump in her throat that wouldn’t budge.

You froze on the spot when you realised who it was, not entirely sure how you were gonna play this. Realistically, you might as well just see what it is she wants, it couldn’t hurt, could it?

“Hey.”

Her footsteps were practically silent but still felt deafening as she stepped closer to you, cringing slightly at how tense and forced all of this felt. It was her fault, she knew that, she hoped you did too. She didn’t want you blaming yourself for her actions, although she couldn’t say anything if you did, she was the one who had insulted you and planted the thought in your head, and she felt every fibre in her body beg for you to forgive her.

Approaching with caution, she walked up to the top of the bed, kneeling where Wanda had been earlier, but unlike Wanda, she didn’t reach out for you. She didn’t feel she had the right. Not now. She quickly took note of your eyes and how they were drooping and red, just like how hers had been earlier, which is how she could know in an instant that you had just been crying. She felt like a knife had gone through her chest at the sight, knowing that she had done that to you. She’d let you down so much that it had brought you to laying in bed alone and crying.

You mumbled something incoherent, completely muffled by the covers that were blocking your mouth.

“Sorry, I couldn’t hear you through the cover, could you tell me that again?”

You looked down a little, debating on doing it or just asking her to leave this conversation for another day. ‘But, she was already here, so you may as well get on with it.’ you thought, and with that, you tugged the covers down a little, letting Natasha see your full face now, unable to stop a tiny hint of a smile creeping up on her face. Your nose was runny, your eyes were puffy, and your face was flushed, but that didn’t change the fact that she still believed you to be the most beautiful woman she’d seen.

“Has something h-happened?” You hiccuped, noticing the frown take over her features as she maintained her eye contact with you.

“Yeah. i was a complete idiot.”

“Nat-”

“No, no, please. I want to explain. I need to explain. Please?” She pleaded, not caring how desperate she might’ve looked.

You paused for a minute before sighing gently, nodding at her and giving her a non-verbal go ahead to continue. She took a deep breath, looking away for a second then looking back at you before you could even blink. You could see her hands tremble a little, and while you were upset with her, you couldn’t leave it alone. You reached your hand out from under the cover and held it out to her, offering it for her to hold. She grabbed it without hesitation, squeezing it gently as a single tear fell, gathering the courage to say her next words.

“I have no excuse for what I did. There is nothing I could say that would make my actions plausible or acceptable, I shouldn’t have treated you like that or said what I did, and I understand if you can’t forgive me, or don’t want to. But I needed-, no, I need you to know, I'm sorry. I’m so sorry, Y/N. You deserve better.”

More tears had fallen down her face at this point, her thumb not ceasing in their circular movements on the back of your hand. She didn’t know if this was going to be the last time she felt your hand in hers, so with every circle, she was savouring the moment, no matter how badly she wished it was under different circumstances.

You shuffled a little so you were in a more upright position, hoping that it would make speaking easier. You’d taken in every word, and while you were hurt, extremely hurt, you saw how remorseful she was. Her face showed no sign of humour or like she was lying. You could always tell when she was lying, her eyebrow always twitched a little, which you would always be in stitches about when she tried to say she didn’t eat your last cookie and her eyebrows would be moving like mad. They were as still as stone when she was speaking this time.

“You really hurt me, Nat. I didn’t think I was asking for much, just some time with you, that was all. And you left me every time, for work and with no notice. It was embarrassing.” She nodded in acknowledgement as she listened. “A-and then to come back and witness you being so, so, hostile, with me, I didn’t understand what I'd done.”

She gulped audibly before speaking again. “You hadn’t done a thing. Not a thing. I-I threw myself into work, into training. The last mission, I was sloppy, I wasn’t on my A game, it almost ended up with other people seriously hurt. So I thought-” She took a shaky breath in. “I thought, if I trained harder, It would mean I would be better for the next mission. But I disregarded everything else on the radar, including you, and then I got so mad at myself for it that I ended up taking it out on you instead. You don’t have a selfish bone in your body, and it was out of order for me to ever say so. It was wrong, and I don’t think I can apologise enough.`` She gave you an apologetic smile, tears streaming down her face steadily now.

“You know, when I came home from the restaurant, I had this driver.” You smiled. “Nice woman, she’s got a wife. She was telling me that it wasn’t easy for them. They had their ups and downs, their fights and bitterness. But they always found their way back to each other.” You whispered so softly that if there was any other noise in the room, Natasha wouldn’t have heard a word.

“And, when we argued, I really didn’t think we were going to be able to come back from that. I thought that maybe our time had expired.” You sniffled, your own tears trailing their way down your cheeks. Without thinking, she wiped them away, her palm pressing onto your warm cheek as you nuzzled into it, still finding comfort in her touch.

“I don’t want us to expire, Nat.”

There it was. There was the sentence that turned silent tears into fully body wracking sobs, your hands instinctively going to pull away and cover your face, instead, Natasha brought herself up to sit on the side of your bed, hastily bringing you into her chest and her free hand combing its way through your hair.

She rocked you back and forth, letting you get everything out of your system, no matter how much it hurt to hear.

“Shh, I’ve got you. I’m so sorry, moya lyubov.”

Your sobs soon died down with Nat’s help, sobs turning into faint pants with how tired you were and how much energy it had taken out of you. You looked up at her softly, as she smiled down at you.

“I love you, Natty.” You murmured, the words making the assassin’s heart grow fonder for you, if that was ever possible.

“I love you more.”

“Can you stay with me tonight? I can’t sleep without you.”

“Of course. Anything for you.” She leaned over you, bringing the blankets back up and over you, catching a glimpse of some brown fur among the darkness. She knew exactly what it was. She picked up up with the blankets and handed it to you, happiness overtaking her as she saw your eyes light up at the teddy she won for you.

“Thank you.”

“No, thank you, Detka.” She pressed a kiss to your temple before settling down, holding you tight in her grasp, refusing to let you go for anything or anyone, not that you were complaining, you’d missed this.

Nothing had to be decided tonight, there was no rush for discussion. Sure, there were still things to talk through and work out, but that can wait. All that mattered right now, was that Natasha was there. She was holding you in her arms and you felt every ounce of love and apology she could give you. And that was enough for now.

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mypoisonedvine · 3 years

Text

vignettes of a bond || alpha!bucky barnes x omega!reader

I originally wrote this in two parts for my sleepover but after I realized how long it accidentally became, I've reformatted it, added/changed a few things, and made into a oneshot!

word count: 3.1k

warnings: smut, angst, knotting, violence

June 2nd, 1943, 11:43 p.m., James Barnes’ bedroom

“I wanna do it, before I go,” he whispered against your skin. “But I know it’s wrong. It’s too cruel.”

“No, please,” you whimpered, “I want it. I want your mark.”

Bucky pulled back for a moment and you examined your Alpha’s face carefully, knowing it might be the last time for a long time. “I couldn’t bond to you and then leave you. It wouldn’t be fair… you deserve to find somebody who can stay, and be with you, and protect you.”

“All I want is you,” you whispered. “Please, Alpha… bite me.”

You saw him hesitate for a moment before he leaned in and sucked at your neck, building the anticipation before he finally sunk his teeth into your skin and you cried out, one single tear rolling down your cheek. “Mine,” he growled against your skin as he lapped at the healing wound, “my Omega. Forever.”

“Yours, only yours,” you agreed eagerly.

It wasn’t the first time Bucky had taken you, but that night he really and truly claimed you, left you a desperate begging mess, stretched out over his knot as he filled you over and over.

The next morning, you were still sore between your legs as well as on your new mark, and it took everything in you to be strong as you saw him off at the train station, waving goodbye and praying that your Alpha would return to you soon.

November 9th, 1943, 2:24 p.m., undercover SHIELD facility

“You promised Bucky you’d take care of me,” you reminded him with a little smile, wiping a tear from your cheek.

“I know,” Steve relented, “but we both know I can’t do that. Not in this state. But maybe I can protect you if I do this. Maybe I can protect my country. I owe it to everyone, especially Bucky, to try.”

You nodded. “But I’ll miss you.”

“I’ll miss you too. Come see me before I ship out for good, alright?”

“Of course,” you agreed.

December 27th, 1943, 8:32 a.m., your front porch

“You’re lying,” you gasped as you shook your head. “You’re wrong, no, it’s not true.”

“It is,” Steve promised as tears welled in his eyes, “I’m so so sorry, I saw it myself, I had to watch him fall…”

“It’s not true! He’s not dead!”

“I know he loved you so much. He talked about every day, he couldn’t wait to come home to you,” Steve remembered, choking up noticeably. “But he won’t. He’s gone.”

“You don’t understand, I know, okay? I know.”

“You’re in shock, I understand, it’s hard to lose your mate—”

“You’re a beta, you wouldn’t understand,” you dismissed; sure, he looked like an alpha now, but it didn’t make a difference. “Omegas, we know when our Alpha dies, we feel it, it kills us. He’s far away, but he’s still there, I still feel him!”

Steve held you as you sobbed, your body crumpling into his arms. Sometimes you thought maybe he held you too tight on accident because he was still getting used to his new strength; other times you thought he did it on purpose.

February 3rd, 1944, 12:00 p.m., undercover SHIELD facility

“Even when I had nothing, I had Steve,” you recalled shakily, “and now he’s gone too.”

“Is that why you’re volunteering?” Agent Carter asked you. “Because you’d rather sleep for a hundred years than live without your mate and your best friend?”

“I’m volunteering because my mate and my best friend died for SHIELD,” you corrected firmly, “and if I’m not willing to also, then I’m admitting I think they went to waste.”

“Steve told me you didn’t think Bucky was dead,” Peggy remembered.

You winced. “I’m not sure. But I know he’s not coming home again. I came here to give whatever I could to help find him… I was asked to participate in a cryogenics research study. If it helps him, then I’ll do it.”

She was about to get up, apparently satisfied with your final interview, but you stopped her.

“On one condition,” you added. “If James Barnes is found, alive or dead, wake me up to see him.”

She nodded, stepping out of the room and leaving you alone again.

May 8th, 2012, SHIELD headquarters

“Can you hear me?”

You slowly blinked awake, your vision taking a moment to catch up with your mind. You saw tubes coming out of your arms; you saw Steve above you, looking like the day you saw him last.

“Did you find Bucky?” you asked instantly. Why else would they wake you up?

“No,” Steve answered, seemingly a bit disappointed that that was your first and only question.

“Then put me back to sleep,” you demanded.

“It’s been 68 years,” he told you. “You’ve slept for 68 years. It’s time to wake up.”

And you did, more than you ever wanted to, because you realized you couldn’t feel him anymore. Your Alpha was gone. Worse, he probably died while you were asleep; he probably died alone.

One more time, like he had 68 years ago, Steve held you while you sobbed.

August 1st, 2014, 2:11 a.m., Avengers compound, Steve Rogers’ quarters

You ran into Steve’s room barefoot and still in your pajamas, barreling through the door and right into his bed.

“Steve, I feel him!” you rushed.

“What?” he groaned sleepily, looking up at you as he blinked in confusion.

“I feel him again, he’s alive,” you explained. “I know it. He’s weak… he’s hurting… but he’s there.”

“That’s impossible,” Steve shook his head. “It’s been too long, he would’ve died of old age anyways.”

“Don’t you want to believe it? Don’t you want to think he’s out there?”

“Do I want to think he’s alone and I didn’t save him?” Steve hissed. “No, I can’t say that I particularly do!”

“But we still can, Steve, we just have to find h—”

But before you could finish, the feeling left you, and you were just half of something again.

“Oh,” you breathed.

“He’s gone again?” Steve realized.

You nodded, biting your lip as it started to quiver. He sighed and pulled you into a hug. “If I could just see his body, and know it was over,” you whispered, “if I could just bury him, have a funeral…”

“We’ll have one,” Steve decided, “after this mission. We’ll put him to rest. He deserves that, and so do you.”

You nodded into his shoulder. It shattered you into a million pieces but it was still the better option, to try to let him go in whatever small way you could. He would always, always, always be your Alpha, nothing could change that, but a funeral would at least bring some closure.

That would have to wait until after your next mission though… and it was going to be a big one: tracking the elusive Winter Soldier.

August 3rd, 2014, 1:14 p.m., Lower East side

You were a few blocks away, helping civilians escape the firefight, when you felt it.

For one impossibly brief moment, you felt him, stronger than you had in nearly 80 years. He was here.

You instantly got up and ran like you’d never run before, finding the Soldier and Steve locked in a brutal showdown— but his mask was gone now, and you nearly fell to your knees at the sight of him.

“Bucky!” you yelped, but you knew he wasn’t there or you would’ve felt his presence. Your Alpha was somewhere underneath the shell that wore his face, and you needed to find him.

You ran forward just as Steve made a break for it, getting to him just in time to stand between the Soldier and his mission.

“Alpha, please,” you whimpered, clutching at his chest. A metal hand backhanded you to the ground.

“Out of my way, Omega,” he growled, stepping over you, but you grabbed at his ankles even when he tried to kick you away.

“My mark,” you explained hastily, pulling your shirt down some to make sure it was visible. “It’s yours. Do you remember? You gave me this. This is your mark on me.”

He stared down at you, seeming to be contemplating it, and you scrambled back to your feet and faced him.

“I still feel you,” you whispered. “I knew you were alive, I knew you’d come back to me. I could feel you, right here,” you explained as you took his hand and placed it on your chest. “Could you feel me? Did you know I was waiting for you all this time?”

His eyes were watering but he still seemed confused— stunned, more specifically, as you placed your hand on his chest.

“I’ll always be yours, Bucky. I’ll always be your Omega, no matter where you are.”

A stun gun took you down, an array of masked men appeared, and before he could really see you for what you were, he was dragged away and taken to be erased again.

August 3rd, 2014, 9:04 p.m., Avengers compound, medical bay

“I can’t believe we let them get away,” Steve lamented, resting his face in his hands. “I can’t believe they took him again…”

“They’ll be back,” you promised sternly. “They’re going to figure out what I am to him. They’re going to realize I could break his programming. And they’re going to come for me.”

“And when they do?” Steve pressed.

“We’ll be ready. And I’ll get my Alpha back.”

August 3rd, 2014, 9:04 p.m., temporary HYDRA operations facility

"The woman on the bridge... the Omega..." Bucky mumbled. "She knew me... she had my mark."

"No she didn't."

He furrowed his brow. "She showed me..."

Pierce sighed, glancing over to the HYDRA scientist who looked back at him sternly.

"She's too dangerous to be left alive," the man sighed, shrugging in his lab coat. "We can't deprogram a bond like that."

"We'll take care of her," Pierce promised.

Bucky launched from the chair, snapping his restraints like paper. "Touch her and I'll fucking kill you!" he bellowed, tackling his handler to the ground.

Pierce just laughed as another scientist jabbed Bucky with a needle, dosing him with something strong enough to kill any other man but just enough to knock out a super soldier. Pierce stood up and dusted himself off as he watched Bucky go limp and be lifted back into his chair.

"I can see the fight in your eyes, Soldier," he taunted as he leaned into his face. "I know you really would kill me, if you could. The spirit is willing but the flesh is weak, right? But don't worry about your mate, we'll make it quick and painless. Hey, maybe beforehand me and a few of the other Alphas will show her a good time, poor thing's been without her mate for 70 years... I bet she's raring to go."

Bucky's arm twitched as his eyes started to fall shut, a tear falling down his blank and motionless face.

"Wipe him," Pierce instructed to the scientist, turning and walking away as the electric whirr of the machine charging up filled the room.

August 11th, 2014, 3:53 p.m., SHIELD headquarters

Steve was impressed with how accurate and imminent your prediction was; HYDRA was hot on your trail and desperate to eliminate the biggest threat to their Asset. Knowing they were coming made it easier, but it was still a brutal fight.

You and Steve tried to stay together, but they were smart, they used the perfect bait to lure you away.

"Tell me where he is," you demanded from the HYDRA agent as you held a blade to his neck, "then I'll kill you."

"Isn't it supposed to be 'or I'll kill you'?" he frowned.

You shook your head. "Not the way I operate."

Opposite to the reaction you were expecting, he grinned widely. "He's here."

Your heart stopped.

"On the roof. He's here to kill you."

You dropped the knife and ran straight for the stairwell, ascending them like they were nothing and calling out for your Alpha.

You found him there, waiting, gun trained on you. Raising your hands in surrender, you yelled to him again.

"Bucky," you called across the windy roof, eyes nearly blinded by the bright afternoon sun. "Alpha."

"I'm not who you think I am," he yelled back. "I'm not your Alpha."

It hurt to hear it in his voice, but you knew it wasn't him. Cautiously, you stepped closer. "Before you left, you told me you didn't want to mark me and leave me behind," you recalled. "But I wanted it. I wanted to be bonded to you more than I'd ever wanted anything."

He could clearly see you were coming closer, he even tightened his finger over the trigger of his weapon, but he was waiting. You kept walking to him, slowly.

"I've never regretted it," you continued, "not even when I thought you were dead, not even when I had to spent a lifetime-- more than that-- apart from you."

Finally you were face to face, and you stepped closer until his gun was pressed right into your chest.

"You can shoot me now and I still won't regret it," you promised. "I love you."

Shakily, he lowered his weapon. "Omega..." he breathed.

"Your Omega."

He pulled you into him and you sobbed as you felt him come to life in your arms-- the real him, your Alpha, your Bucky. He held you close and breathed against the top of your head and it was like a dream coming true decades after you'd forced yourself to let it go.

But you'd never given up. And now you had found him again.

Agents started to come onto the roof and Bucky spun the two of you around, firing with his right hand and using the left, metal arm as a shield for you.

He carried you and you didn't even know where he was taking you, but it didn't matter. In his arms, you were home.

August 12th, 1:03 a.m., Avengers compound, your quarters

You hadn't stopped coming or crying for at least an hour. Bucky had all but split you open on his knot all night and he didn't show any signs of stopping.

He apparently intended to make up for lost time. And you'd lost a lot of time.

"Just one more, I know you can give me one more," he groaned furiously rubbing your clit as his knot began to swell again.

You could give him anything, as long as he asked for it like that.

You'd lost count of how many times he'd told you to come for him, and how many times you did it immediately.

"I can see how full you are," he whispered as he rubbed your stomach gently. "So much seed in you that your body can't hold it all."

You looked down and yep, you were distinctly bloated from his come alone; it made you a little dizzy to even look at it.

"The idea of you alone during your heats, no one to protect you, it kills me," he explained with a growl. "I won't let you go again. I can't."

"Then don't," you sighed. "Never leave this bed, fill me with everything you have."

"Did anybody ever help you through them? The heats?" he asked. "I wouldn't blame you, they can be so painful... I just need to know so I can make sure you forget about them."

"No, Bucky, never— I never let anyone touch me."

"Steve could've helped you, at least some..."

"He wouldn't have, he loves you too much. And I wouldn't accept anything less than you, ever. You're my Alpha. We're bonded. There's never anyone else."

That didn't seem to satisfy him, his eyes darting away as he swallowed. Your gut sank with the realization he probably wasn't being totally honest about why he asked.

"Your ruts," you gasped. "Were you alone for all of them?"

He shut his lips tighter.

"Bucky, it's okay, just tell me. I was asleep for 70 years, I skipped most of them, but you... you had to live through them all."

"They gave me betas, and omegas," he mumbled, "but I don't... I don't really remember. I know they wanted me to. They threatened to hurt me if I didn't, because they knew I'd go crazy after so many ruts alone, but I can't remember if I really did it. I remember... I remember crying, and begging for you."

"Alpha," you breathed as you felt new tears run over the stains of your old ones. "It's okay. Whatever happened, it's okay now. We're together again. Everything's okay."

You wiped his tear away with your thumb, holding his face tightly, weaving your fingers into his long hair.

"I'll always be your Omega," you promised.

He leaned in closer to you, kissing your cheek before pulling back a little. "It's faded," he whispered as he ran his thumb over the mark on your neck. "The last time I saw it, it was still fresh."

"It's older, sure, but it's stronger than ever, Bucky."

August 14th, 10:12 a.m., Avengers compound, residential area kitchen

Steve's eyes went wide when he came into the kitchen for breakfast and found you there, steeping your tea. "Surprised to see you out of the love nest so soon," he smirked.

"It's been three days, I don't think that counts as soon," you scoffed.

"It does to him," Steve frowned. "He's asleep, isn't he?"

"Yep."

"I know he wouldn't let you out of his sights if he was conscious," Steve chuckled.

At that moment, you heard Bucky call your name and run out into the hall, only a bedsheet covering his groin as he appeared in the doorway. You spun around and smiled when you saw him come running towards you, embracing you with his free arm.

"You should've told me you were leaving, I got scared when I woke up without you," he admitted weakly.

"Oh, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to make you worry!"

He pulled back and clutched your face in both his hands. "I'm waking up next to you every morning for the rest of my life, you understand?"

You nodded dutifully. "Yes, Alpha."

"One hand on the sheet, please, Buck?" Steve winced, looking away.

“Whoops,” Bucky groaned, reaching to cover himself as you laughed softly.

“Let’s go back to bed, baby,” you decided quietly, taking Bucky’s (free) hand in yours and waving goodbye to Steve, who was already making his way as far out of earshot as possible.

#alpha!bucky barnes x omega!reader #alpha!bucky barnes smut

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lovelylonlyworldd · 2 years

Text

The Prince

AU where y/n meets the mischievous Prince Harry at a ball.

word count: 1.6k

~~~

“This is not the time to mess around! I’m serious y/n.” My mother spitted out her endless scolding. I’d learned to ignore her by now, but still, her shilling voice always annoyed the hell out of me.

“Well shit, there goes my plans for the evening.”

“Language, young lady.” I rolled my eyes as she continued: “I’ve picked out a gown for you, ‘cause god knows you can’t choose an appropriate one yourself.” I knew exactly what she was referring to. The “incident” that happened when I last got to select my own attire. I wouldn’t even call it an incident, but apparently, it’s not “appropriate” to have a little slit in your dress.

“…so Ella and the girls will help you get ready, do not hush them away.” She places a big emphasis on “not” and promptly walks out of my room.

I promise that I’m not aggravating her by deliberate choice, she’s always been like this - to me at least. I try to not dwell on her resentment anymore, nowadays I drink her hate up like a warm cup of tea in the afternoon. It’s nothing out of the ordinary. Besides, hate is always better than indifference. And I suppose that I’m not completely innocent myself--I did wear that scandalous dress that drew shame over my whole bloodline.

~~~

Sweet, sweet Ella knocked on my door when I’d just gotten to the climactic part of the book I was reading.

“Come in!” I tried not to sound hostile as I let her in, despite her interruption. After all, she’s sweet like a sugar cube--dear I say the only person I like in this big big house. She walks in and as I sit up in my bed I see an emerald dress in her arms, and it’s not too ugly.

“Please come and sit down my lady, so that I can do your hair.” Sweet, sweet Ella smiles.

“I told you it’s y/n.”

~~~

My mother was watching me like a hawk. Appearing over my shoulder with a snarky comment, just when I least expected it. As I was about to take a bite from some weird dessert she remarked how I should “Be careful so I don’t spill on myself”. Did she seriously think I was five years old? Anyway, I suppose it was a fairly regular ball. My father was making diplomatic connections here and there. Lately, I’d sensed that he was trying to marry me off, preferably to some prince. Though he already knew that I’d never agree to it.

But I was quite frankly bored out of my mind. I’d taken to a usual activity of mine - mindlessly looking around the room until I found something interesting. Above the dancefloor hung an enormous crystal chandelier, as it usually does in these lavish ballrooms. I’ve always had this intrusive thought about it falling down on all the dancing people. As a child, I stared at the lamp and saw the screws get loose and gravity pulling it down. And how all the kings, lords, and princes got crushed by its weight. Sometimes it was my mother who stood thereunder, but that fantasy always left me full of guilt.

As I continued to gaze around I caught eyes with a tall brown-haired guy on the opposite side of the room. I recognized him immediately--anyone would, he was the talk of the town for the moment. “Prince Harry is a real womanizer!”, “He won’t make for a fit king, he couldn't care less about the wellness of the kingdom!”, “I don’t think that boy has been polite to anyone in his entire life.”, these were things you heard all the time. But as we locked eyes, I could only feel a sense of intrigue. The way his gracious body relaxed against the wall was like something from a painting. He was as intimidating as one could be, eyebrows hung low as he really, really stared at me, with a smug look on his face.

He didn’t break eye contact for what felt like a lifetime. I’m not one to back down from a challenge though. And even as his eyes burned holes in mine, like they were shooting out lasers, I still kept the contact. But then my stupid mother stepped in front of me.

“Don’t just stand here y/n! Go dance or something, god!” She whispered-screamed at me. If she only knew who I was having a staring contest with--I’m certain she would freak out. Partly because he was a prince of my age that was suitable for marriage(that was positive), and partly because he was Prince Harry (and that was immensely negative, as he was absolutely not suitable!). But I didn’t bother to say a thing, not even protest the order she just gave me. I just headed to the dancefloor.

Immediately a blond boy appeared in front of me, and he put his hand out as an invite.

“Lady y/n, can I have a dance?” He smiled politely. And I took his hand.

“Sure.”

~~~

Turns out the boy was a prince called James, and he was as interesting as a rock. And I’m no geology enthusiast, just to clarify--I hate rocks. Thankfully the song ended. But as soon as the new tunes from the orchestra sounded out, someone grabbed my arm and pulled me in. I stumbled into a hard chest. And as I looked up I found myself standing in front of Prince Harry himself.

“Mind a quick dance?” He asked, but he had already started moving along to the new song, with one hand on my waist and the other in my hand.

“Don’t think I have much of a choice, do I?” He snorted from my comment, not a pinch of amusement on his face.

“You must not hate it, given the way you stared at me earlier.” My cheeks burned at his remark. He’d stared at me too, in my defense.

“Your reputation precedes you, your highness.” I changed the subject. At a closer look, his eyes were green, and his other features were perfectly balanced. He was quite enticing.

“Yours too.” His voice was gravelly. And he looked serious as ever but I couldn’t help but laugh at the ridiculous statement.

“No, it doesn’t.” I was a nobody.

“Yes it does, I've heard you're quite the troublemaker. Is that true?” Now his expression shifted to something slightly playful. But his words surprised me. He’d heard about me?

“I’ve heard you’re quite the womanizer, is that true?” I shot back, but he stayed quiet, observing me for a moment, long enough to make me nervous. He then leaned in to whisper in my ear. My body tingled from his presence.

“Do you want me to be?” I was very aware of his proximity, his breath against my ear, his hand on my waist. The song had ended now and I stood frozen. A smirk spread on his lips from my now flustered state.

“Perhaps, I wouldn’t mind it…” I managed to reply. Swiftly his hand snapped around my wrist as he walked towards the exit, leaving me to trail behind him. Anxiety flooded my chest. What if anyone saw? This sure wasn’t appropriate. But no one seemed to notice, and soon we were out in the hallway. Harry didn’t come to a halt, he just lead down the corridor.

“Can you slow down a bit?” His long legs had nothing on my poor heel-bearing feet and I’d almost tripped over my gown several times. But he didn’t even acknowledge my request, still continuing his quick paste. Where the hell was he taking me?

After a sharp turn to the left, we found ourselves in a dark little nook. My back hit the wall as his lips crashed against mine, fast and greedy. Hands were everywhere, mapping each other’s bodies like unexplored land. I twirled his long locks between my fingers. And I felt him grow hard against my stomach, as I relished in his touch.

“Y/n!” Our motions stopped abruptly at the shout. Steps were echoing through the corridor. I knew it was my mother. That fucking cockblocker. Harry stayed still for a beat and then released me from my pin-down against the wall. I quickly adjusted my clothing and hair--nothing had happened here, no. Panic rose in me, she was getting closer. But I knew that I’d be fine as long as she didn’t see Harry. Harry, who looked completely unbothered. I put my hand on his chest and mouthed “Stay here” before I emerged into the hallway, where I immediately came face to face with my enraged mother.

“Where have you been?” she said, voice low but deadly.

“Powdered my nose.” Her dark eyebrows rose. However, her disbelief didn’t phase me. I could easily talk myself out of this one. She was quite gullible, my little mother.

“You didn’t have to walk so far, there are bathrooms just by the--”

“Oh, I must’ve missed them then.” I interrupted. “We should go back now, Father’s surely looking for us.” I took her arm in mine and began to walk, trying to get away from there as quickly as possible. Mother followed suit immediately.

“You’re right. And maybe if you were a little more attentive you could’ve found them.” I just ignored her.

After walking a few meters a glanced over my shoulder, and as I had hoped, my eyes met with his. He was just standing in the middle of the hallway with his hands in his pockets. The last thing I saw before turning around was a smug smirk twisting his lips as if to say he wasn’t done with me. I hope he wasn't done with me.

~~~

pt 2?

#harry styles fanfiction #harry styles blurb #harry styles one shot #harrystylesau #prince harry #pls tell me if you liked this

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shotorozu · 3 years

Note

hi!! so um i wanted to request maybe some hc or scenarios about midoriya, shoto and shinsou being loyal? if that makes sense? idk i've just read some angsty fics about cheating todoroki and now i'm sad :(

being loyal

character(s) : todoroki shouto, midoriya izuku, shinsou hitoshi (bnha)

legend : [Y/N = your name] gender neutral; they/them pronouns, quirk not mentioned

headcanon type : fluff, angst-ish, suggestive but it’s barely there (x reader)

note(s) : first of all, cheater! todoroki isn’t realistic at all in my opinion, even if it’s used as a weapon for other x reader fics. i don’t think todoroki would ever be with someone he didn’t love anymore, especially since that being in a romantic relationship would be a very big step for him, i could go on, but don’t worry about it anon!

no proofread wndnwnw

»»————-　♡　————-««

todoroki shouto

shouto as a lover is interesting. sure, you’ll argue like any normal couple— he’s not the best at understanding what’s wrong sometimes

and occasionally, you’ll have to shove it in his face for him to get the memo

his blunt words don’t help at all sometimes

but, you know one thing that shouto’s not? a cheater.

not even sugar coating it. he’ll never cheat. he loves you too much for him to even be thinking about other people

and i don’t think he’d stay and hurt someone’s feelings, if he felt like he shouldn’t be with them anymore

shouto’s popular, as to be expected. he’s the son of endeavor— who happens to be loaded, handsome, and also equipped with an amazing quirk

there’ll be a handful of people that’ll try to throw themselves at him.

as i’ve mentioned in the pick me girl post, shouto may be unaware about certain things, but as soon as he realizes what they’re trying to do

he won’t be nice, and that cold demeanor of his will come back in a snap. and, he’ll most likely try to leave right away.

like,, a girl could be half naked in front of him, but he wouldn’t even spare a glance at them. they’re not you, because they’re not hot. why does it matter? here’s an example :

random girl : “a man like you wouldn’t mind having a few extra lovers, right? there’s not harm”

shouto : 😐

shouto on the inside : ‘cooking some soba for Y/N would be delightful tonight, wouldn’t it? you should leave before it gets too late.’

he wouldn’t even say goodbye, the look on his face is enough to tell that he’s not at all interested in their advances

after all, you already make him feel complete and so loved🤠 shouto would rather slurp 3 pairs of jeans through a straw than ever think of cheating.

midoriya izuku

it’s not difficult for him to stay loyal either, i mean,, loyalty in a relationship is the bare minimum anyway

all he’s focused on is you, improving and honing his skills, and fulfilling his dreams.

heavens forbid anyone for thinking that he’d ever get with any other person that’s not you

he’s aware that over time, he’s been an unintentional chick magnet— and technically, he’s friendly with everyone excluding bakugou, sorta

but right away, he understands when someone’s trying to get with him

while he might’ve said they were just being friendly before, he recognizes the signs well— considering that he thought YOU were just being friendly

izuku’s not blushy and well,, a mess. he’s still polite, compared to the other two— but, you can tell that he’s losing interest in the conversation that’s rare

but, if a girl’s going to stand in front of him half naked, he’s going to get flustered at first because they’re NEARLY flashing him tf?

and if anyone accuses of him being disloyal, he’ll get offended but mostly sad, because the thought makes him feel utterly sick to the stomach.

oh, and he’ll always make sure to mention you and your existence.

here’s a short example of how he’d be loyal!

random girl : “your quirk’s awesome! our kids would be super powerful ;)”

izuku, knowing well that his kids wouldn’t be able to genetically inherit any quirk of his: “thanks! if Y/N wants to have kids, our kids will be raised well. i appreciate for the compliment!”

random girl : “no, i mean—”

izuku : “it was nice speaking to you :) gotta find my darling now.”

he’ll leave immediately, not even thinking about looking back to see their reaction. he needs to see you

and the first thing he’ll tell you when he sees you is what had just occurred. the feeling in his stomach disappearing when you lend him an attentive ear

shinsou hitoshi

ehh— compared to the other two, he wouldn’t notice right away.

he’ll assume that the people trying to snag him away are just being nice. because of his middle school days, friendliness is still something he’s trying to figure out.

he wouldn’t understand why someone would want to be with him since well,, man’s taken. no one would stoop that low to be a homewrecker

except for a few people, that had no sense of what was right or wrong. they just went for it regardless of his relationship status.

and when he realized what they were after, he’ll deadpan, absolutely uninterested.

compared to todoroki, hitoshi will simply tell them straight to their face that he’s taken, and he’ll just have to hope that they’d get it— and end the conversation in a nice away

but— if they don’t, he won’t hesitate on using his quirk this time. not to harm them of course, but to steer them away

example :

hitoshi : “i’m taken, and very happy with my relationship.”

random girl : “hmm,, but they don’t have to kno—”

and before the pursuer could even finish her sentence, they’re under his quirk, and he’ll demand that she forgets about the encounter, and that she’ll stay away.

because how dare they suggest that you wouldn’t be smart enough to find that out. their desperation makes hitoshi laugh

oh, and hitoshi will definitely shit talk them when he sees you again. he’ll even be so extra about it if he needs to

»»————-　♡　————-««

likes and reblogs are appreciated, thanks for reading!

i do not own bnha/mha and it’s characters. boku no hero academia/my hero academia belongs to horikoshi kohei, i only own the writing and i do not profit off of my hobby

do not plagiarize, reupload, translate, or use my works for audio readings without permission

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loveaffaire · 3 years

Text

Seasons

Pairing: Peter Parker x Reader

Warnings/tags: a bit of angst, fluff, cheating (not by Peter/reader), Pete being a hopeless romantic as always

Word Count: 1.3k, I swear these blurb requests are turning into full one shots because I love Peter being completely whipped by the reader :(

A/N: @spiderholland101 I’ll be honest, I’ve never heard any of those songs so I picked a bunch of lyrics and built a story around it, just 1.3k words of Peter being desperately in love with the reader! Enjoy <3

🤍JOIN MY SLEEPOVER🤍

Summer - Heaven help a fool who falls in love

Peter tried not to stare at you but it was hard when you were sitting two seats away from him in chemistry class. Your skin looked as soft as cotton, lips plump and covered in strawberry chapstick, hair softly shining in the sunlight coming through the window.

His heart would beat a little faster every time you’d laugh, his breath would hitch each time you’d run to him in a crowded room, a smile would find its way on his lips the second his phone would light up with a text message from you.

It’s gonna get messy so don’t fall in love with your best friend, you fool, he’d tell himself.

❥ ‑‑‑‑

Autumn - You've been on my mind girl like a drug

Peter stood still in the middle of the school entrance as he watched you kiss Harry, his hands in your hands, a smile on your lips. It was like getting shot in the head and no, he wasn’t exaggerating, that is exactly how it felt to see your best friend that you are in love with be in love with someone else.

He pulled himself out of his daydream of repeatedly punching Harry in the face and rushed towards you. You pulled away from your boyfriend as soon as you heard footsteps approaching you, a smile settled on your lips when you saw Peter.

“Ready to go?” Peter asked, completely ignoring Harry and you nodded. To his dismay, Harry didn’t let go of your hand without giving you a very steamy kiss right in front of him.

You made small talk on the way to his house and Peter tried to focus on anything other than the kiss you and Harry shared just a few minutes ago. And when you sat on his bed, eyebrows frowned in concentration over chemistry, Peter’s eyebrows were frowned for a whole other reason. Thoughts of you getting too busy in your love life and forgetting him creeped up on his mind and you noticed.

“What’s wrong, Pete?”

“Uh… can’t understand this question”

“You weren’t even looking at the question, you were looking at me” your voice low as you scanned his face, “did I do something?”

Peter’s eyes widened, “no, y-you didn’t do anything, nothing”

“Okay so what is it?”

Peter sighed, biting on his lip because he was nervous and too afraid to say something wrong but he decided to be honest, “just scared you’ll get too busy with Harry and stop hanging out with me, it’s just a thought”

You were taken by surprise by this but soon, the sound of your soft laughter filled the room, “forget about you? We’ve been friends since forever, no boy is ever going to come between us Peter”

Peter’s eyes glimmered at your words, his cheeks turning rosy as he processed your words.

“Anyway, I’m too scared that you’ll forget about me because I saw you hanging out with all those smart science kids earlier today” you teased, your forefinger wiggling in his face as he shook his head, smiling.

How can I forget about you when you’ve been on my mind like a drug, he thought to himself.

❥ ‑‑‑‑

Winter - I wonder what it's like to be loved by you

The cold came and the days turned ugly, one text message to Peter and he was running to your house in the middle of the night.

You saw Peter through your window and opened the door, running into his arms. The impact was so hard that he almost fell back as your hands clutched on his jacket.

“He cheated on me” you cried, voice strained from the previous screaming match with Harry over call.

Peter held you close, walking back inside your house and closing the door behind. As soon as he let go of you, you fell down to your knees and he got down right in front of you as he wiped your tears with his sleeves.

“He doesn’t deserve you, Y/N” he said sincerely. His hands holding the back of your head to make you look at him and he almost kissed you that night. But he didn’t because what if you push him away, one heartbreak was enough for tonight anyway.

As he watched you weep on his shoulder for a boy who clearly didn’t deserve you, he wondered how it felt to be loved by you and if he’ll ever get to be loved by you at all.

❥ ‑‑‑‑

Spring - Wouldn't it be nice to live inside a world that isn't black and white

The colours were a bit brighter than before, the leaves and the flowers blooming again in the soft spring wind. Just like them, you were blooming too. You were the old Y/N again, the same old Y/N who was there before Harry came along and ruined it.

The glow in your eyes was visible, your smile felt more real now and you felt more comfortable in your skin than you did 2 months ago. Peter even helped you pack a box of all the things that your ex-boyfriend left at your place and you later sold those things at a thrift store.

Peter started seeing more of you, he would either be at your place after school or you’d be at his and sometimes, you’d go to the ice cream place near his place on a hot day.

As he watched you munch on your ice cream cone, the vanilla on your lip looked a bit more appetising then it did when it was on the cone and he almost leaned in to have a taste.

“Is there something on my face”

“No”

“Why are you staring then?” you smiled and raised your eyebrows at him.

“Oh, shut up” he rolled his eyes, “come on, let me walk you home before it gets dark”

With you walking by his side and the way your knuckles gently brushed against his made him realise how much brighter his world looked now. How wonderful it was to live in a world which wasn’t black and white anymore and it was all because of you.

❥ ‑‑‑‑

Summer - Honey I love you

The sun was setting, both of you returning from the summer fair and he finally gained the courage to hold your hand on the way back home. The hot weather was making your palm sweaty but Peter couldn’t care less. You were literally here, holding his hand in yours and he didn’t want to let go.

“Peter”

“Yes?”

“Will you say it?”

Peter frowned in confusion, “say what?”

“You know what” you bit your lips, a bit of sadness in your eyes.

“I- I don’t know what you’re talking about” Peter stuttered.

Peter was clueless. For a straight A grade student, he was pretty dumb when it came to love and you.

“So you will just never tell me that you are in love with me?”

Peter halted in his step and that halted you in yours. His hand slightly loosened its hold on yours in horror but you were quick to tighten your hold on his hand, even tugging him closer to yourself so you both were face to face.

“You know?” He finally spoke up, voice in a whisper and mouth agape in shock.

“It’s hard to miss when you’re right there staring at me with your big brown doe eyes” you softly giggled, feeling a bit shy now, “and how you get flustered when I compliment you, how you always have my back and how you always pick me up, it’s obvious that it’s more than just… friendship”

Yes, you knew. You have been waiting for him to say something, anything at all to show you that he loved you but as time passed and still no word from Peter, you finally took matters in your own hands.

Peter was speechless and you have had enough, you sighed and let go of his hand. Peter almost collapsed when you placed your hands on either side of his face and pulled him in.

You filled the gap between you both as you pressed a soft peck to his lips and his eyes fluttered like butterfly wings, savouring in the feeling of the airy kiss. Your lips felt like a light feather, barely there but just enough to make him feel lightheaded for a second.

You pulled away quickly but then pressed your forehead to his and closed your eyes tightly, “honey, I love you”

You said it like a promise, your chest felt a little lighter when the words were finally out and Peter’s heart started racing in his chest again. When he finally processed what had happened, he didn’t waste another moment as he pulled you back in for a kiss.

“I love you” he whispered, words muffled with his lips never leaving yours, “I love you, Y/N”

He repeated the words multiple times, telling you ‘I love you’ for every single time he couldn’t in the past and your eyes watered at the intensity of emotions soaring in your chest.

As he stood there kissing you, his mind went back to last winter and how he wondered how it would feel to be loved by you but now he didn’t have to wonder anymore. He knew how it felt to be loved by you and it felt like heaven.

Anyway, hopeless romantic Peter, my beloved🥰

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bubblefina · 2 years

Text

King of Hearts chapter 25

Masterlist

Summary: Reader and Tom meet during their years at Hogwarts, but as the years pass a rivalry grows between the two of them, which leads from soft beginnings to tragic endings.

What the characters look like!

“ If you didn’t have your family to fall back on, you’d be dead after graduation “

Pairings: Tom x f!reader

•̩̩͙*˚⁺‧. •̩̩͙*˚⁺‧.˚ *•̩̩͙ ✩•̩̩͙*˚⁺‧. •̩̩͙*˚⁺‧. •̩̩͙*˚⁺‧.˚ *•̩̩͙ ✩•̩̩͙*˚⁺‧.

Chapter 25-Things Fall Apart

“You look stunning, y/n.”

“I’m wearing a sweater, Jarrod.”

Your mother was right, the Davis’ visited the very next morning, very much to your dismay. Trying to talk with the family felt like pure torture, if only you could have stayed with Melissa or someone elses family. Lenard, the father, kept talking about his business while his wife doted on him. Both of his children, Evelyn and Jarrod either made small talk with you or didn’t talk at all. Whenever they did talk to you, it was either asking about your school, or backhanded compliments.

“So how is that boarding school, y/n?” Evelyn asks.

“It’s great, I love being there and hanging out with my friends. A wonderful environment.” You fake a smile and continue to fiddle with the sleeves of your sweater.

“I’m sure that you find that they accommodate your needs?” Aileen asks, glancing at you and your parents.

“My needs?” you ask.

“Why yes, I’ve heard that you have a few special needs that need to be taken care of. Don’t worry dear, I’m sure that you’ll be able to make it through the upcoming terms.” Aileen says.

“I assure you Mrs. Davis, I don’t have any special needs that need to be accommodated. Whoever told you that was full of rubbish. You’re a grown woman, you should know better than to listen to silly rumors.”

It seems that you might have said more than you were supposed to, because almost everyone at the table was staring at you, even your dear sister Dahlia looked at you with her big eyes.Your mother especially, who looked as if she was about to blow a fuse, cradling her butterknife within her clammy palms.

“Excuse me, enjoy the rest of your meal.” You excused yourself and stepped outside. Sure it was snowing, but freezing to death was better than dealing with that family for who knows how much longer.

Your peace and silence only lasted for around 10 minutes before the front door opened and someone stepped out. Suspecting your mother, you inhaled deeply before looking towards the figure. It was surely not your mother.

“Jarrod…what are you doing here?” you ask.

“I do apologize for my mothers behavior, she had no right to talk to you like that.” He stands next to you, putting his hands in his pockets in an awkward manner.

“It’s fine, I’m not thinking that much of it anyways.” you try to end the conversation as soon as possible, finding it a little hard to talk with him anyways.

You put your hands on the bars of the front porch, releasing a deep breath. Your warm exhale combining with the cold air made wisps of breath evaporate into the air.

“No, I really mean it…”Jarrod doesn’t look at you, but his hand moves out of his pocket and sneaks over to yours, “A girl like you has already been through enough. You’re like a doll my love, if you’re not careful you’ll break.”

“Excuse me?” You move your hand away from him and question him with a disgusted expression, “First of all, I’m not a ‘doll’ I’m a human being who has feelings, feelings that should be respected. Secondly, don’t wrap your hand around mine. I understand that you may be trying to act like a gentleman, but you should know when your presence isn’t needed.”

You turn to walk away, but he grabs you by the arm.

“Don’t speak to me like that, I am-”

“You’re a what? A rich snobby brat, yeah I’ve known that for years. Now let go of me.” you send him one last glare before heading back inside. Surely he wouldn’t be able to enter your room, not if you lock it.

Coming home from Hogwarts was never easy.

Sometimes you wish you could never come home, it would make things so much easier.

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Thank Merlin you were only staying at home for a few weeks. Jarrod ratted you out that very night to your mother, and you never heard the end of it from there. If you were only allowed to use magic outside of Hogwarts, you would have surely made the dinner fall on him that night.

You had your bags packed early for when you can leave again, and like always, your father accompanied you to the station.

“Do you have your-”

“Bracelet? Yes, I’m wearing it,” you raise your right hand and wiggle around the bracelet that dangled around your wrist, “Are you ever going to tell me why I need to keep wearing this thing?”

“It’s a precaution of sorts, don’t worry about it.” He kisses the top of your head, escorting you to the train.

“Good luck at home dad, hopefully mom wont bite your ear off about me.” You step onto the train, taking one last look at him.

“Don’t worry about me dear, focus on your studies and be safe. I love you.”

You return the affection and go inside the train, trying to find your seat. Of course you were able to find your friends and immediately took your seat.

“How was your guys’ break, I need to know the details.” Azalea says.

“Same old with me, except this time my dad talked about the war going on much more than he needed to. It was kind of depressing really, not the thing you discuss at Christmas dinner.” Naomi gave a dry laugh, scratching the back of her head.

“Blimey, that’s tough, but what's even tougher is that it's true. The war really is getting worse, do you think it will affect our time at Hogwarts?” Azalea asks.

“You’re the one that can see into the future, why are you asking us?” Melissa asks.

The question made the group fall into laughter, not much could be said for Azalea however. She pouted and crossed her arms, acting like a disappointed child.

“I haven’t had a vision in months, is that a bad thing? Am I supposed to get them frequently, or am I an abnormality?” Azalea asks.

“I don’t think any of us know Azzy, but when was your last vision anyways?” Naomi asks.

“It was around October, it was a really weird one that I couldn’t make out.”

“Well do tell, now I’m curious.” You reply.

“It was just a bunch of colors flashing by, and screaming. It felt like time was moving really quickly, I gave up trying to figure it out in divination. I don’t feel like it came true anyways.”

Oh boy. If you didn’t know any better, you would have thought she had a vision about your time traveling to the 20’s. You can always trust Azalea to have a vision about something prominent, but the poor girl always has a hard time deciphering it.

“You know Azzy, I think you should tell us all of your visions, that way we can help figure out what's going on in them.” You say. It was more or so you wanting to know what would happen next so you could be prepared, despite the unknowingness of her visions and where and when they could happen.

“You think so? Figuring out my visions will be like extra homework.” Azalea replies.

“I think that this homework will be beneficial to us.” Melissa says.

“Enough about me, y/n, how did your break go?” Azalea asks.

“Horrible, the Davis family visited again. Their son tried to flirt with me, and when I rejected his advances he told my mom about it and she chewed me out for the rest of the break.”

“Don’t worry, when you’re able to use magic in the muggle world you can turn his head into a pumpkin.” Naomi says.

“Knowing y/n, she’ll do much worse.” Melissa says, beginning to giggle which signals the others to do the same.

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Classes resumed as normal, and this time you weren’t afraid of confrontation. Since you basically ran away with a tail in between your legs during the last DADA lesson, Merrythought gave you one more chance for a better grade. You met with her after your quidditch practice ended and performed the spell to the best of your ability. Merrythought invited you to be alone because you had requested it, you’d rather not have people see who you were afraid of…again.

She passed you with a half grade, and you took it as it was. It couldn’t be helped since the original lesson was weeks ago and you were just now making it up. After leaving the classroom, you were heading back to your dorm, but stopped when you saw a familiar face coming around the corridor.

“What are you doing here so late?” you ask.

“I was meeting with someone, and I will not indulge you in any of the details.”

“What made you think I was going to ask for details, Tom?”

“Because that’s what you do, you were probably born that way, always prying into other peoples business.”

You let out an audible gasp, clasping your hand over your heart to be dramatic.

“I can’t believe that you would even suggest that. I’m a good friend, I would never pry into your private business. It’s probably boring anyways, study business or whatever it is you like.”

“Whatever you say,” Tom stops at one of the doors, “I’ll see you later then.”

You nod and walk ahead as he heads inside the room. It was almost sundown, and that meant dinner time was not too far along. In the meantime it would be best to clean up and do some of your assignments, especially potions. Slughorn's workload just increases every year, but it's not like you were going to continue the class after your 5th year. One more year and you’d never have to list the uses of dragon's blood ever again.

“Why are you guys crowded in here?” you ask, entering your dorm room.

“Obviously we live here, y/n. What took you so long to return anyways, quidditch practice ended ages ago.” Naomi says.

“I know, but afterwards I had to go meet with Merrythought and do the boggart spell again. My last attempt didn’t go so well, so this time she gave me half credit for it.”

“And?” Azalea asks, her eyebrow raised as if she was looking for more intel.

“Then I saw Tom, walked with him for a while and came here.”

The three girls looked at each other with a mischievous look on their faces. It definitely reminded you of your first year, when you returned to the dorm late at night after being at the Astronomy tower, and the girls waited for you.

“You’ve been hanging around him a lot.” Melissa speaks up.

“Yeah, and the both of you are on first name terms now. Did we miss a chapter in your guys’ friendship?” Naomi asks.

“The both of you hated each other's guts a few months ago, something must have happened.” Azalea said.

“I think you guys are reading too much into this. We overcame our differences and can act like civil people now. I thought you’d be happy about that.” You ready your bath supplies as you take one final look at the girls who laid on their beds.

“Don’t forget, she and Archer had a little getaway with each other during the ball. Could there be two men in her life?” Azalea says, earning a dramatic gasp from the two other girls.

You give a scoff that ends with a laugh as you head to the bath house to clean yourself. Azalea wasn’t wrong, both Tom and Archer were prominent figures in your life, which is ironic. Ironic in the sense that they are both polar opposites of each other. Perhaps Azalea was right, maybe there were two men in your life. If it came down to it, who would you have to choose?

That was a question for another day.

While dinner was being served, you and your friends were having conversations of your own.

“She’s still the same heinous bitch as always.” Naomi says.

“Who?” you ask.

“Lela, we were partnered up in potions, and she refused to do any of the work. When I asked her why she said she refused to work with a muggle born.” Azalea whispers, angrily smashing her fork against the food on her plate.

“Of course the word she used wasn’t muggle born, it was something much worse.” Naomi rolls her eyes and stares at the Slytherin table.

“Who does she think she is? Just because she's pure blood, that doesn’t mean she’s any better than us. You’ve seen those times she’s pretentended that she doesn’t know what she’s doing so she’ll get sympathy, right?” Melissa moves in closer to whisper, so that no one around them can hear. Merlin forbid that Lela hears someone talking bad about her.

“She’s a piece of work, I'll tell you that. All of the jabs she made at Azalea today made me want to jinx her on the spot, but we all know Slughorn won’t have any of that.” Naomi says.

“You know, I learned about a jinx in a book that I’ve been wanting to try out recently.” You reply, a sly smile spreading across your face.

“You wouldn’t dare, she always has her possy around her. If you try they’ll just report you to Slughorn, or worse Dippet.” Azalea says.

“I just need to catch her alone then. No one can get away with calling you filthy names like that, you don’t deserve to be targeted just because you’re muggle born.” you scan the Slytherin table and wait for an opening.

“Looks like the time is now, Lela’s getting up and no ones following her.” Naomi looks with you, her eyes following Lela as she walks out of the Great Hall and into another corridor.

“Y/n, please. Don’t do anything rash.” Melissa holds onto your hand before you get up to leave, her eyes pleading with you.

“Okay fine, I won’t use magic. I’ll just talk to her, but if you hear an explosion that means she did something to set me off.”

You wait a few seconds before following Lela out of the Great Hall. She went down towards the Slytherin dungeons, which was slightly troublesome for you. Venturing into other houses' corridors was never an easy task, but you’ve done it before. You casted a disillusionment charm on yourself, making you blend in with your surroundings.

The Slytherin dungeons only had a few lights leading down the long hallways. Lela seemed as if she was in a rush to get to where she was going. Was she meeting someone?

You were a little behind her, but you heard her footsteps stop, and a deep sigh came from her. You hide behind a wall and listen in to what she would do next.

“Why must we meet in secret?” She asks.

Now curiosity really struck you, she was meeting someone! But who?

“Why can’t we just tell everyone, are you embarrassed of me?” She spoke again.

‘If I was dating you, I would be’ you think to yourself, wanting to laugh but you decided to stay quiet.

“No, I’m not embarrassed of you…”

Your smile slightly faltered for a second, that voice sounded so familiar. You slightly turn your head so you can peek at whoever Lela was talking to, and your eyes almost fell out of your head when you saw who it was.

“I’m not embarrassed of you, but we must keep our relationship a secret until we’re both ready to tell people. Some people will not accept us.”

“Maybe you’re right, there are so many evil people out there. Isn’t that right, Tom?”

Tom, Tom bloody Riddle was the person she was meeting with.They were in a relationship? Like…a romantic relationship? Out of everything, that would have been the last thing you expected. It stung your heart slightly, you could feel blood rushing throughout your face as you watched them interact.

“There are many evil people out there, and I promise to protect you from anything or anyone that tries to harm you.” Tom says back.

Your breath got caught in your throat, and it felt like you couldn’t breathe. It was confusing as to why you felt like this. Was it because seeing him with Lela, the person who you disliked least in the whole wizarding world. Or was it because you had developed some type of feelings for him, and it hurt to see him act like he was in love with someone else.

Lips quivering at the thought, you bite them to prevent yourself from making any noise. It felt as if something heavy was sitting on your chest, preventing you from making any movements. Fingers going numb at the thought that this was real and not just a dream, you scratched the wall beside you.

You shook your thoughts as you took one last glance, god knows why you did that. The last thing you saw before tears clouded your vision was them leaning their heads together in a kiss. It felt as if your heart shattered into pieces at the sight. Multiple emotions overwhelmed you, to the point where you felt like you couldn’t stand there anymore. Rushing out of the Slytherin dungeons, you skip the Great Hall and go straight to your dorm, but it was as if life didn’t want you to experience this alone.

“Are you alright, y/n?” A voice asked.

You stop in your tracks and look in front of you with your blurred eyes. Dumbledore stood in front of you with a worried expression, his eyebrows furrowed.

You wasted no time instantly bursting into tears, it's not as if you could hold them in anymore.

“He…he!” you gasped out, clamping your mouth over your hand to muffle your sobs. While crying you were only asking yourself one thing, why did it hurt so much? You never acknowledged your feelings for Tom, in fact you barely knew you even had feelings for him. Out of everyone here, why did it have to be Lela?

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You spent a few hours in Dumbledore’s office, wrapped in a blanket next to a fire. The tears dried by then, but the pain was still there. It wasn’t as potent as it was earlier, now it felt slightly numb, or maybe that's just because you’re tired. You managed to let Dumbledore know the basics of what happened. Hearing you say it out loud made you realize how childish it was to feel that way, but Dumbledore denied your thoughts, saying that it was perfectly normal.

“Its dumb, its so dumb. Why should I be getting mad in the first place, it's his life after all!” you bellow out.

“These types of feelings are normal, y/n. I know that you didn’t acknowledge your feelings for him before this, but it still hurts you because you care for him.” Dumbledore says, bending down and offering you a cup of tea.

“She’s a horrible person Dumbledore…why would he do this…”

You were allowed to go back to your dorm after you had calmed down. Of course the girls asked how your confrontation with Lela went, to which you looked at them with sad eyes. You ended up telling them about your feelings for Tom, and how your heart was absolutely crushed at what you saw in the dungeons. The group offered you some consolation, engaging in a group hug.

“Ah who needs boys anyways? All they do is break your heart.” Azalea said.

“I doubt that you’ve experienced heartbreak Azalea, or else you would have told us. Right?” Melissa moved closer to Azalea as if she wanted to interrogate her, but Azalea rebutted her question by shoving her hand in Melissa's face.

“I haven’t, but after all of the boy drama we went through, I don’t think it's worth the trouble. Don’t you remember, y/n had to go into the forbidden forest after she covered up for Tom.”

“To be fair, she was the one who coerced Tom into tagging along with her in the first place,” Naomi took a second to look at you with a sad smile, “I think you should take this as a sign to distance yourself from him.”

“Way to get to the point, Naomi. At least give her some hope.” Melissa furrowed her brows, staring at Naomi.

“C’mon, they’re not good for each other. Don’t you remember the fiasco during third year? Lela ruined her potions project and Tom covered for her. Afterwards everytime y/n and Tom saw each other they were at each other's throats.” Naomi reminded the group of the past troubles that had happened between you and Tom. Hearing them made you agree with her, the both of you weren’t good for each other.

“Yeah, that is true, but they’ve been getting close recently. It would be a waste for it to go down the drain.” Melissa replied.

“Y/n’s feelings will go down the drain. I don’t want that for her.” Naomi rebutted, standing her ground against Melissa who was rooting for true love to break through.

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A week had passed since the incident. You took Naomi’s advice and decided not to confront or interact with Tom for the time being. It would be awful to ruin your good friendship just because you didn’t approve of who he was dating. Lela or not, he deserved to be loved…right?

Your avoidance wasn’t done in the best way however. Almost everyone could notice that you were obviously trying to run away from Tom whenever he approached you. Tom being one of the ones who noticed.

He had managed to catch up to you after class one day, on a day when you knew you weren't going to see him. Knowing that you wouldn’t have to see him made you put your guard down as you walked down the corridors, simply wanting to get back to your dorm to catch up on extra sleep.

“Y/n,” Tom said, pushing past students as he began to walk beside you, “I’ve been trying to talk to you for the past few days.”

“Really? I haven’t noticed, sorry.”

A short reply, yet an efficient one. Unfortunately, it wasn’t efficient enough to allow Tom to leave you alone.

“What a load of shit. I’m having a flashback to our third year when you were avoiding me as well.”

You stayed silent and continued to walk, nothing good would come of confronting him now. It’s not like you wanted to either, your emotions were all over the place, which is really unfortunate considering that you were just now getting better from the time travel incident.

“You’re not replying,” Tom suddenly stands in front of you to stop you from walking, “What’s wrong?”

“I have nothing on my mind, I’m just tired.”

“Tell me what’s wrong then, maybe I can-”

“You can’t do anything Tom, this is just something too complicated. Even for you.”

“You doubt my abilities. I’m the one who was by your side whenever you were having your breakdowns.”

“Well this is different okay, it’s not the same. Just forget it. I don’t need your help, now get out of my way.”

You try to continue walking, but Tom doesn’t step out of your way.

“What’s the matter with you, you’re acting like a bitch.”

Hearing that made all of the thoughts in your head stop. He did not just call you that. It’s as if those words ignited a fire inside of you, and you were hardly able to contain yourself.

“Oh? You’re calling me a bitch? I think you should look deeper into your circle of friends, maybe then you’ll see who the real bitch is.”

You shove your shoulder against his as you walk away from him. Taking deep breaths to calm yourself, you’re not sure if you could stop yourself from becoming toxic if he confronts you again.

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?”

There it was, an invitation to a long awaited fight. All that hate that you felt for Lela sprung up inside of you.

“I don’t know, why don’t you ask your bitch of a girlfriend, but wait. I’m sure you’re too busy kissing her serpent-like lips to do so!”

Tom stared at you in disbelief, his eyes blank as he took in what you had just said.

“What are you…” He whispered

“Don’t act innocent, I saw the both of you. I’m not angry that you’re in a relationship, I’m just wondering why it had to be with Lela of all people.”

Tom stayed silent, which angered you even further.

“You are well aware of everything she’s done to me, right? Jinxing my broom and making me fall hundreds of feet, plagiarizing my potions project and getting me into trouble. She’s been so horrible to me, yet you fell in love with her? What does that say about our friendship?”

“It says that he doesn’t care about you, obviously.” A voice behind you says.

Lela walks next to Tom and wraps her arm around his eyes. Her gray eyes shining with Malice, her lips turned into a smile as she watched you hold in your breath.

“Stay out of this.” you say.

“How could I? You’re questioning Tom’s relationship with me, obviously I have a say in this right?” She replies, now looking up at Tom. Fake innocence stemming off of her form as she tries to cower behind his form.

“Is there a reason why I shouldn't? You’re a horrible person, Lela. Who knows what you’ll do to Tom.”

“Watch your tongue, half blood.” Lela spits out, finally letting go of Tom's arm and striding in front of you.

“Half blood? Are you aware that your boyfriend is a half -blood as well? Or are you really just that much of an idiot.”

Lela cups your cheeks with her hand, glaring onto your semi shrunken form.

“My family can tear you apart limb by limb, I hope you know what. You should really be careful of who you’re talking to.”

“Oh I know who I’m talking to,” you spit out through gritted teeth, “A spoiled bitch who has nothing better to do than to pick on those who she deems inferior.”

Lela’s eyes open wide, her hand releasing your cheeks, but only to have the same hand strike your cheek.

“How dare you, you filthy-”

“Are insults about someone's blood status the best you’ve got, Selwyn?” you stare at her, eyes darkened. Things were now out of your control, anything that happens from now on is out of pure impulse.

You were seeing red.

“If you didn’t have your family's money or status, what would you be exactly? You don’t do well in your classes, all you can do is pick on people and decide whose life you should make miserable next. If you didn’t have your family to fall back on, you’d be dead after graduation.”

“You little, ugh!” Lela pulled out her wand and shot a spell at your shoulder. Your bag now flung across the floor, accompanied with a stinging sensation in your arm. You didn’t have your wand, of course you didn’t have your wand.

By now, people had already begun to crowd around the three of you. It had looked as if Lela put you in your place, as you were clutching your arm in pain as you thought of what to do. If you tried to get your wand that was in your bag, she would surely take the chance and hurt you again.

“Not talking anymore? Remember this, y/n, I am more than how I appear.”

You glance behind Lela and lock eyes with Tom. This scene gave you deja vu. You were on the floor without your wand, vulnerable to another person who had malice in their eyes. The only difference was that this time, Tom didn’t look like he wanted to save you.

You move your eyes from Tom and stare at Lela again. She held her wand high, ready to cast another spell at you. Since when have you been so helpless, to just watch as a person came to hurt you. You haven’t been like this since your grade school days, back when your bullies were relentless at making you feel like you were different.

But it's true…you are different. They were right, so what is stopping you from standing up for yourself this time?

Lela said a spell that you didn’t recognize, but before it could land, you raised your hand in front of your face. As if you were trying to block it, you hoped that something would happen, perhaps this time luck would be on your side and you would be able to fight back.

As the spell came closer, it suddenly stopped in place before it was shot back at Lela with full force. She flung down the corridor and knocked students out of her way as she did. Staring at what had happened in front of you, you look back at your hand. There was a gold energy swirling around them, power rushing through your veins. It felt like you had just gotten a boost of magic power.

Non verbal and wandless magic wasn’t uncommon amongst Wizards, but for someone like you to do it on a whim with no instruction whatsoever. It seemed very unlikely.

Adrenaline rushing through your veins, you got off of the floor and onto your feet, still staring at your hand. By this time, Lela had gotten to her feet as well, albeit with some help from the people around her. Her hair was a mess, as were her robes. She looked at you with more rage than she did before.

“How-how did you!” She couldn’t form a proper sentence as she tried to fix her attire.

“I guess your words are true, but in this case…I am more than I appear to be as well.” is all you could say, looking at Lela with blank eyes. You didn’t even spare Tom a glance, but you could tell that he was shocked. You had done something that he hadn’t even dreamed of doing.

“What is this ruckus?” Someone moved through the crowd, stopping when they caught a glance of you.

“Professor! She attacked me!” Lela bellowed, quickly pouting her lips as she pointed towards her dreaded attire.

“Is this true, Ms. l/n?” The professor asked.

“May I remind you of my last occurrence with Ms. Selwyn? She lied and had gotten away with it, this time is the same as well. I think she should be the one who has to be questioned, not me.” You look at the professor with the same blank eyes before leaving the premises. It wasn’t because you weren’t afraid of what you had just done, no, what you had done was terrifying. It was because you knew that the blame would be put on you if you stayed there for too long.

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It wasn’t like running away from your problems would do you any good. You were bound to be caught eventually. Being taken to headmaster Dippets office was one of the last things on your mind, but here you were, being interrogated against your will.

“I’m telling you, she casted a spell at me first. I didn’t have my wand, I don’t know how I did what I did. You have to understand that.” defending yourself felt like a chore, repeating the same words over and over again hoping that someone would believe what you were saying.

“Miss Selwyn informed the faculty that you were the one who initiated the argument.” Dippet responded.

“Oh, initiate, sure. I was having a conversation with Tom when she popped out of nowhere like a weasel. We spat some insults at each other and then she shot a spell at my arm, it still hurts by the way.” You flail your arm around, ignoring the pain as you try to make your point.

“Ms. l/n-”

“Headmaster, please. Lela is a pain in my behind, and if I could go the rest of my life without seeing her I would. In other words, tell her to stay away from me and everything will be fine.”

“I understand your concerns, ms. l/n. However, my concerns are how you were able to defend yourself. The witnesses say you were able to use magic without your wand.”

“It isn’t uncommon for a wizard to use wandless magic, right?”

“It isn’t, but for someone of your age to be able to do it with no prior knowledge whatsoever. It is indeed rare. Not to mention that you didn’t recite a spell either. Tell me Miss. L/n, have you ever done this before?”

You shook your head, “No professor, this was the first time I’ve done it.”

Dippet closed his eyes and took a deep inhale.

“I will allow you to walk freely this time, seeing as how you acted out of self defense. However, I must advise you to be careful in the future. Seeing as you’re able to use magic without a wand nor recitation of spells, you will have to learn to control your abilities.”

“What do you mean by control?”

“I will be assigning you an extra class of sorts to work on your magic control. Will professor Dumbledore be a good choice for your instructor?”

You were slightly reluctant to say yes. More work for what you considered a freak accident? On the brightside, if you were ever in a situation where you didn’t have your wand, and your strength wasn’t enough to protect yourself…

“Very well then, I’ll take you up on the offer.” you reply.

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Word had gotten around about your altercation with Lela, which wasn’t surprising. You decided not to indulge whoever asked you about what had really happened. It was tiring answering the same question over and over again, why did other students care so much about what happened in the first place.

They even came to the quidditch pitch when your team had practice to ask about it. Thankfully Porter was able to shoo them away for some privacy, him being a good team captain and all.

“Now, I’m sure you’re well aware that our final game of the season is against Slytherin. The game itself is a few weeks away, but we must train for it. We lost our last match, which was a big blow for our point average. If we win this game, we’ll beat Hufflepuff for second place.”

Being able to concentrate on something else other than your situation with Lela felt refreshing. Quidditch also allowed you to be able to take out your pent up frustration on something useful. Gwyneth also offered you some more physical training, to which you gladly took up.

As per you promised, you met with Dumbledore after practice every day to practice your magic. Finding how you were able to concentrate your magic power and use it without a wand was also one of the many things on your agenda.

“You do believe me, don't you? It just happened, I felt a surge of power rush through me.” you tell Dumbledore, taking a break from your training.

“I do believe you, y/n. The thing I want to know is how you were able to do it, you shot Lela back quite a few feet and left her injured. You are strong, but you’re not that strong.” Dumbledore replied, setting down the book he was flipping through. He now sat in front of you, contemplating on what to do next.

“If you ask me, she deserved it.”

Dumbledore laughed before clearing his throat, “Enough of that, I need to know something about you.”

“Ask away.”

“Is there a special magic in your family? Anything you know that is out of the ordinary that could possibly explain your magic capacity.”

Scrunching your brows, you raise your head to the ceiling as you try to think of anything. Your father never talks too much about magic, but he has said a few things. Eyes widening at the realization, you sit up straight to look at Dumbledore.

“My father did tell me that we’re descended from a lineage of creatures. He described them like they were angels of some sort, they were known for their singing and use of pure magic.”

Dumbledore looked impressed and began to listen as you explained whatever you could remember about your lineage.

“So your ancestor fell in love with a wizard, fell pregnant, but was separated. Afterwards, no one was able to contact your ancestors' family?” Dumbledore asks.

“That’s basically it. Since they were able to heal people, and sometimes even bring someone back to life, they were hunted, enslaved and some were even killed.”

“You know, this might have a correlation with how you were able to use such potent magic. I’ll look into your ancestry to see if we have anything about angelic creatures that could sing galdr.”

“You don’t have to do that, it’s not like finding out what happened to them will do any good.”

“Nonsense. If we can explore your ancestry, we can help you with your magic. You might be a powerful wizard one day.”

“Are you trying to build up my ego?”

“Never, I’m just hoping well for the future.”

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

Lets just say that every encounter that you had with Tom afterwards was one of the most awkward things that you’ve experienced. Looks like all that work working towards a better friendship went right down the drain after that encounter. It had been a long time since that, but the both of you refused to talk to each other since then. A mere eye glance was all you two had with each other, and whenever you’d catch him looking at you, he’d look away immediately.

Curse your emotions, why did you have to be so upset anyways. Maybe there was something that Tom saw in Lela that made him attracted to her? Or perhaps…Tom had been into her for a while. He did cover for her during third year when she plagiarized your potions project, maybe he did that because he liked her.

It’s no use thinking about that anyways, what's done is done. All you could really focus on right now is your training with Dumbledore.

Right now he was working on making you use wandless along with wordless magic, but it was no use. No matter how hard you concentrated, you just couldn’t make it work again. It was highly frustrating, for a moment you thought you were special since you were able to do something so extraordinary. Unfortunately, reality hit you.

“Maybe it was a once in a lifetime kinda thing?” You ask Dumbledore.

“That, or it was because you were in danger, and your magic wanted to protect you.”

Protect you? It decided to work when Lela was threatening you, but not when you were nearly killed by a man twice your size. Oh whatever, it's all in the past, literally.

“Does this mean I just have to put myself in danger again?”

“Of course not, we just need you to feel like you’re in danger.”

“These are very unorthodox methods, Dumbledore.”

“We’re in a time crunch, y/n. School ends in just two months, and before that, exams are beginning.”

“Before we resort to drastic measures, can we try simple spells. Like wingardium leviosa?”

Dumbledore nodded and placed an ink cartridge in front of you, signaling that he wanted you to begin your new training.

“Maybe it would be easier for you to say the spell this time as well. We’ll take it small this time around.”

You nodded and placed your hands in front of the cartridge, saying the spell over and over again, but no luck.

“Why isn’t it working?” you whisper.

“It’s unlikely that you’ll succeed in what you want to do on the first try.”

“It’s also beginning to look like that I’ll never be able to do it again.”

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