#but what are you supposed to do when you start talking to your crush online but she thinks you're a guy

[peachblossomdrama]

Why do you want me to call you Earth? Because it's earth So? It revolves around the Sun Are you flirting with me?

#23.5 #23.5 the series #23.5 องศาที่โลกเอียง #milk pansa #love pattranite #casey speaks #this show is so cute #i can't deal #ongsa has the same energy/day dreaming skill as tinn in my school president #but what are you supposed to do when you start talking to your crush online but she thinks you're a guy

[dumbseee]

insecurity.

f1 au/fic: in which, lando and y/n have been dating for a few months, but fans are still talking about y/n’s past relationship. making lando feel insecure and questioning y/n’s feelings for him.

lando norris x singer!reader

(fc: jess alexander)

note: english isn’t my first language so excuse me for the mistakes this might have xx ALSO it’s the first time that i’m actually writing something so i hope it’s not too bad lmao. thank you for reading my aus btw <3

liked by landonorris, maxfewtrell, danielricciardo and 2 799 009 others.

y/n: happy birthday to my sun, you’re such a beautiful soul, i’m so proud to call you mine. i love you to the moon and back and promise to always love you.

_

landonorris: i love you more baby

danielricciardo: we’re at practice and he’s crying btw

fan1: they’re so absjdkdoldel

fan2: mama y papa

fan3: he always smile so brightly when he’s looking at her :(

fan4: i’m sorry but i can’t help but think about y/n’s ex… on the same day last year she was posting pictures of him

fan5: @.fan4 don’t do that… it’s about lando, not her ex

fan6: am i tripping or she also used to call her ex, her « sun »??

fan7: @.fan6 WHAT

fan8: @.fan6 no she didn’t?

_

lando sighed and threw his phone on his bed. of course he saw all the tweets about you and your stupid ex, how could he ignore them when it was all over the internet. people were speculating about if he was a rebound or a toy for you. lando was hurt, he always thought that you were way out of his league anyways so he should’ve seen it coming, right? you were an amazing and worldwide known singer, with your angelic voice and heartbreaking lyrics. you sang with your heart which made anyone who was listening to you, fall in love immediately.

that’s what happened with lando. he was always a big fan of yours, singing your songs on top of his lungs at parties, and following every single news about you, he even went to your concerts. one day, he went viral for singing your song on the radio with his engineer, he also happened to have made it to p3, which he said was because you were his lucky charm. the video was published online and went viral, you saw it and immediately found it adorable. the rest was history.

when you guys hard launched your relationship to the world, the big majority was happy for you two, happy to see you smile and happy to see that lando managed to get his crush. but a small minority saw that relationship as a rebound for you, saying horrible things about how you never loved lando and how you would dump him in a few months to go back to your one true love, your ex.

lando saw it all. and he hated it.

"lando? are you okay?" you asked, when you went to check in on him. he was supposed to bring a few blankets so you guys could watch a movie together. but he was taking way too much time so you went to see if he was okay.

"do you love me y/n?" he asked you, and the sadness in his eyes almost made you cry. lando’s eyes was what you loved the most about him, with his smile of course, but his gorgeous green eyes were full of emotions, you could drown in them and feel every little thing he was feeling just by looking at him.

"what are you talking about? of course i love you lando." you say, taking his hand in yours and softly kissing his knuckles. you saw him close his eyes and sigh deeply. you pushed him on the bed and sat next to him. "what happened?"

"it’s stupid, don’t worry about it." he finally looked up at you and faked a smile but it didn’t fool you.

"lando. tell me." you were still holding his hand and with your free hand you started to caress his cheek. he closed his eyes again and melted against your touch.

"your fans are still talking about your past relationship and how i’m nothing but a rebound to you." he said it in such a low tone you almost didn’t hear him. but sadly you heard his words and you could feel your heart shatter at how your fans words affected him. "i know that you guys stayed together for a while, and i know that you wrote good songs about him, i listened to them all, but… if you still love him you can-…"

"lando norris." you said in a serious tone, which startled him. "how am i supposed to love anyone else when you stole my heart and refuse to give it back?" his eyes lit up a little by your words. "and i literally wrote 56 songs about how much i love you so you better listen to them all once again and never doubt my feelings for you ever again, boy."

liked by landonorris, carlossainz55, charlottesiine and 6 808 009 others.

y/n: ‘you are in love’ is officially out ;) little gift from me to you sweet lan <3

_

maxfewtrell: lando listened to it and locked himself in the bathroom to cry

landonorris: @.maxfewtrell FAKE NEWS

danielricciardo: i wish someone would write 57 songs about me…

heidiberger_: @.danielricciardo excuse me? (great song btw y/n!)

liked by y/n.

fan1: ZKSKSLXPODOSOZ

fan2: y/n making haters eat their words with one song: queen behaviour

fan3: i hope haters will stop hating on lando now how can you say that y/n is using him as a rebound

fan4: CALL 911 IM ON THE VERGE OF DEATH

fan5: y/n writing a love song for lando on his birthday :(

fan6: i love them so much pls

fan7: that whole drama about her ex was so dumb, they broke up for a reason and y/n also wrote songs about how awful he was to her towards the end of their relationship, why do you guys want her to go back to that dog?

liked by y/n.

#f1 social media au #f1 au #f1 x you #f1 x oc #f1 fic #f1 fanfic #f1 instagram au #f1 imagine #f1 fandom #f1 x reader #lando norris #lando norris x female reader #lando norris x you #lando norris x y/n #lando norris x reader #lando norris x oc #social media au #formula one #formula one x y/n #formula one x reader #formula one x you #formula one x oc

[lemonmaid]

Could I request kenma x male reader omegaverse where kenma has a huge crush on reader but doesn't know what to do with it?

Warnings: references to meeting someone on the internet and getting kidnapped/molested.

Omegan Stranger

Kenma Kozume x male reader

"Kenma!! You've gotta meet my friend (Name)! I feel like you guys would like each other!" Hinata jumped onto Kenma, almost latching onto him as a baby koala.

Kenma sighed and tried shaking Hinata off, "Hinata, for the last time please stop coming up behind me, like that you are going to give me a heart attack".

"But! He also likes video games!"

Kenma just stared at Hinata, giving a look, "So you think just because we both like video games, we would like each other? Pass".

"Hey, what are you two gossiping about?". Kurro walked up towards the duo.

"Oh hey, Kurro! I was just telling Kenma about my friend that he would like!"

"Oh is that so~ well you should give up, Kenma's alpha is like non-existent. Speaking of which, are you sure you're an alpha? You know, I've heard of school testing coming out wrong".

"Can both of you quiet down? I'm trying to finish this game before the match starts... also I'm kinda already 'talking' to someone.." Kenma rolled their eyes and focus on his phone.

"WHAT?!"

...

The three walked towards a corner store, "come on Kenma, can you give us a little details about them?"

"No".

Kurro sighed, "Okay... how about where y'all met?".

"On LOL".

Hinata and Kurro, gave eachother a look. "Okay listen buddy, I'm sorry to say but the person might be an 40 old man".

"No they arent".

"Okay! But how do you know! It's a stranger!" Hinata yelled.

"Keep it down please, we are supposed to meet up today at the Internet Café".

Kurro put a hand on Kenma's shoulder, "As your best friend-"

"You're not my best friend"

"Shush, again, as your best friend, I and Hinata will come with you to make sure you don't get molested or kidnapped by a stranger on the internet".

...

Kurro snickered, "Are you really wearing your volleyball uniform to this "date"".

"Yeah because I told them that I will be wearing a red sweatsuit"

"Okay but what are they wearing?"

Kenma looked at his phone, "He said a yellow turtle neck".

Kurro whisled, "Oh so it's a guy?".

"Yeah... is that a problem?".

"Oh no! I'm an ally!"

Kenma gave Kurro a look, "Shut up, we are here".

Hinata looked through the window, "OMG ITS (NAME), I'LL BE RIGHT BACK".

Hinata ran inside, "Jesus what's his problem, right Kenma? Kenma?".

Kenma just stared at the duo through the window, his breath hitch.

'This scent... it reeks'

"Kenma... hello?" Kurro kept shaking his hands in front of the blonde, trying to get him out of his trance.

"Sorry I can't do this". Kenma started walking away from the café.

Kurro looked af Kenma in shock, "HEY BRO WHERE YOU GOING?!".

Hinata and (Name) came out of the café, "(Name)! These are my friends! Kurro and Kenma! Wait were did Kenma go?"

"Um.. I don't know? He kinda just walked away".

"It's okay Hinata, I'm just waiting on a friend to show up, which could be any minute now".

Kurro gave Hinata an awkward look, "Listen, why don't we keep you company untill your friend arrives? So it's safer!"

"Um..." (Name) looked at their phone, "sure that's okay".

...

[11:43 p.m.]

Kenma just stared at his PC screen, debating whether or not to turn it on. 'If I go online, my online statues would be seen and if they are on, they'll wonder why I didn't show up today'.

'Fuck it. I am not wasting my daily rewards on some man' .

As soon as Kenma launched the game, he saw that his inbox had three missed messages.

Hey! I'm at the café! Let me know when you are here! :)

Hey, I don't mean to be a bother but are you coming? My friend came by and is keeping me company until then.

Hey, is everything okay?

Okay, I'm going to go. Sorry things didn't go as planned. Maybe next time? :)

Kenma stared at the messages and sighed, 'God, I'm such a dick'.

[Ding]

Kenma looked and saw that he was invited to an private in game chat.

'Time to face my consequencess'

"Hey, sorry that I didn't show up. Something came up".

"Oh, it's okay! I wasn't alone but we should really try meeting up again next time".

"Yeah. Next time.".

"Yeah.... I was thinking at the in person tournament? It's this Saturday! There is a grand prize too!".

"Yeah, we can try Saturday. Are you thinking about teaming up?".

"Yeah! Of course!".

"Good. Let's do a practice round".

"Ready when you are!".

...

"So why did you leave yesterday?"

Kenma stared at Kurro, "something came up".

"Bullshit". Kurro crossed his arms, giving a judgemental mother look towards Kenma.

Kenma sighed, throwing the volleyball towards the wall, "I don't know, I just kinda froze".

"You froze?"

"Yeah..."

Kurro scoffed, "for an alpha that was adopted by two omegan parents. You sure are skittish around them".

Kenma dropped the ball, "wait, they are an omegan?"

"Duh".

Kenma looked at his chest, 'Is that why you were acting up yesterday'.

"Well if it makes you feel better, we are going to retry Saturday"

"Way to go buddy!" Kurro put Kenma in a head lock, " I knew you could get bitches!".

Kenam growled, "LET ME GO".

"Woah woah, easy there baby alpha. Oh my God look at my baby, he is already growling".

"Please shut up Kurro!".

"No, but for real, we need to get you to prepare! Don't want you freezing up again!". Kurro teased.

Kurro looked at Kenma, "why did you freeze up again?"

Kenma face turned red, picking his nails, "I don't know. At first, his scent reeked then it felt welcoming and I don't know it just kinda made me freeze".

Kurro smiled, "Man, that omega has gotten a hold on your alpha".

"..what".

"Wait how long have you've known him?"

Kenma took a minute, "Well we've been playing on LOL together for a year now".

"And yall are going to meet for the first time Saturday?".

Kenma nodded.

Kurro sighed, "Well you might aswell confess now".

Kenma started choking, "WHAT?".

Kurro started tsking, "No omega would meet up with a stranger they meet on LOL for christ sake. So let's get you to prepare for Saturday".

♡

[Saturday]

"Now Kenma, what did we practice saying?"

"Don't tell him that he stinks"

"Good. What else?"

"Make them feel like they are being heard in the conversation".

"Wonderful. Last thing?"

"Um... food is the way to the heart?".

"No, but just be a good host".

Kurro gave Kenma a pat on the back, sending him his way into the convention center.

Kenma laid eyes on (Name), freezing again, "hey buddy, you are going to be okay". Kurro pushed Kenma foward.

(Name) turned around and smiled at the duo, "hey! Are you Kenma?".

Kenma gulped, "um yeah".

"Oh cool! My name is obviously (Name)! You know the guy you've been talking too on LOL".

The two both nervously laughed, Kurro smiled at them, "Well I'll leave you kids to do whatever nerd shit this is! Later!".

(Name) smiled, "So... the tournament doesn't begin until 1:50, I was wondering if you wanted to check out the anime convention next door until then? There is a lot of VAs here!".

"Um yeah sure that's cool".

"Great!".

The two walked around endlessly in the hot box of an convention center, pushing pass people, looking at the over priced dropshipper vendors.

"Oo! Actually Kenma there is an local artist I want to check out before we go eat. Is that okay?"

"Yeah sure, what art do they do?"

The two walk up to the vendor, "Well they just do fan art but I can't resist keychains".

As the two waited in line, something caught Kenma's eye.

"Hey, (Name). I'll be right back!".

"Oh okay! I'll meet you at the food court?" (Name) chirped happily.

Kenma walked up to an LOL vendor that was selling keychains of the video game characters.

"Um excuse me? Can I get two of these?"

♡

"Kenma there you are!". (Name) smiled and walked towards the blonde carrying drinks.

"Hey" Kenma smiled down, rubbing his neck, "Well I got this for you".

Kenma held out (Name)'s favorite LOL character in a keychain.

"Oh my goodness, Kenma.. you didn't have too".

As (Name) reached out for the Keychain, Kenma grabbed the man's hands.

(Name) look at the blonde, "(Name)...."

"Yes?".

"(Name) if we win this tournament... can I court you?".

(Name)'s face flushed in red.

♡

[Few years later]

"Name... wake up. I don't have time for this today".

(Name) snuggled closer in the bedsheets, just coming off of his latest heat, "I don't wanna, if I do get up that means I gotta be a person today".

Kenma chuckled, "Babe, I love you but I'm trying to stream... I don't wanna anyone else seeing my omega laying in their natural habitat"

"NaTUrAL HaBiTAt, you make it seem like I'm an animal"

Kenma sighed, "Well.. you do bite..".

(Name) threw a pillow towards the man, "You dick!".

(Name) charged towards Kenma; Kenma grabbing (Name)'s legs and flipping him upside down.

"AND HIS NAME IS JOHN CENA! BOOM BOOM BOOOM".

This was my first request and I am very happy! It was long, barely proofread, but I think it was goof! I hope you enjoyed it. Thank you so much! This was kinda rushed, sorry user if this wasn't as good as you hoped it to be. Thank you for the request anyways!

#haikyuu x male reader #kenma x male reader #alpha kenma #male reader #omega reader #omega male reader #kenma kozume #kenma kozume x reader #alpha kenma x omega reader

[cosmicstarlatte]

Reality Show (Obey Me!)

━━━━━━━━━━ ✦ ━━━━━━━━━━

Diavolo convinces Lucifer to have him & his brothers do a new demon reality show that revolves around their everyday lives.

»Characters: Demon Bros // ->[Click here for Part 2: Dateables]

»Tags: LUCIFER CAUGHT IN 4K, Shitpost/Humor, Mentions of reader/MC, Husbando Beel Supremacy, Bulleted Style

»Notes: CM = Crew Member ;; Sorry I was gonna upload this sooner but wanted to draw art for it. xD

Lucifer:

"Okay that's enough, go somewhere else."

CM: "We can't, you agreed to this under contract"

sighs

Mildly regretted his loyalty to Diavolo, otherwise he would've never done this

His camera crew was always on edge with him

The show stressed him more than usual

Perhaps there were a few embarrassing moments he would prefer not to talk about

Like pushing a door that said pull, forgetting the word spoon and calling it a tiny bowl on a stick

[Camera peeks through Lucifer's study, recording a smiling Lucifer texting on his phone]

CM: "Who were you texting Lucifer? Was it ___? There's been rumors..."

"I was checking the weather."

CM: "You take selfies for the weather?"

Mammon:

"Hey wait stop recordin' this! Not that what we are doin' is illegal!"

His camera crew had a rough time with him

But it made for good television!

He talked shit about Lucifer the most

"Yeah a lotta people dunno this, but Lucifer cries to me all the time! What can I say, I'm a reliable guy!"[Crew zooms in on an unamused Lucifer in the background]

[Cut to Mammon hanging from the ceiling]

"Can someone get me down from here!? HEY! WHERE ARE YOU GUYS GOIN'!?"

A lot of the crew's clips had shaky movement from running due to multiple mammon situations

They got a great swoon-worthy shot of Mammon gazing lovingly at you

CM: "Maybe you should confess?"

"I'm confessin' to nothin'! Talk to my lawyer!"

CM: "That's not what we- Nevermind."

Levi:

"I already stream online so this isn't any different."

lol

Levi didn't realize they'd be watching his every move

How was he suppose to worship his shrine of Ruri and you in front of them!?

His camera crew couldn't stop cringing around the otaku

it was uncomfortable for everyone

[Camera films secret sweet moment of him awkwardly practicing asking if you want to hang out]

He asked for it to be deleted, it was denied

However his ratings shot up after that clip and the next one:

CM: "Do you have a crush on ___?"

"W-what!? N-no!!! (Incoherent Levi noises and he trips)"

That clip became a viral meme for weeks

I'm talking remixes and everything

In the end his camera crew actually did have a lot of fun with him and they game online together now

Satan:

"Watch your step. Oh, don't touch that!"

His camera crew had a difficult time with him

He managed to avoid them frequently so he wasn't overly present in the show, much to the annoyance of Lucifer and the others

If they did catch him, all the clips looked the same, all he did was read

They did manage to catch him feeding some stray devildom kitties

[Camera zooms in on him in his room with a collared cat on his lap]

CM: "I thought you couldn't have pets?"

"It's not mine. Clearly, I can't control what comes in my room as of late."

CM:  "It has a collar?"

"Next question."

CM: "What can you tell us about the Anti-Lucifer League?"

"I don't know what you're talking about. Next question."

CM: "Okay... viewers want to know what's up with you and ___?"

[Satan opens a book and gets sucked in]

Asmo:

"It's like, Devilgram Live, but longer!"

Most unbothered out of everyone

He did get annoyed when they tried to catch him before he could start his morning beauty routine

He was scary, they caught it on camera...it was the only time the crew deleted a clip on a brothers request

Overall his crew had an easy time, it was standard to what they normally do, Asmo himself was fun

He was a natural, of course everyone loved him, who wouldn't?

Was the one to start drama for the sake of tv

Nothing too crazy just messed with Luci's schedule, got Mammon arrested, hid Levi's Ruri body pillow, little things really!

[Camera catches Asmo cuddling next to you]

CM: "You seem very fond of them!"

"I am! Oh maybe we can do like a one year WEDDING special later on!?"

Beel:

"Just don't get in my way I guess."

He wasn't really on board with the idea but not much he could do

His crew had an average time with him, he was easy and chill to film

They caught him doing a lot of activities like, cooking/baking, sports, gaming, it was surprising to viewers

His work out clips got a lot of views too, he was a busy demon

They filmed him helping around the house, even cleaning your room and leaving you little gift snacks

CM: "Wow, snacks? You must really like ___!"

"Yeah. I love them. I want to give them the world."He confidently admitted, smiling brightly

Had high ratings in the polls, the show gave everyone a new perspective of him who wasn't just a gluttonous beast

Belphie:

CM: "Is he breathing?"

"Zzz..."

The crew had an easy but boring time with him

There's only so many hours of a sleeping Belphie you can record

The were some soft serene moments with him,Beel and you, gazing at the stars

[Camera catches him sleeping, smiling and mumbling something about you]

CM (poking): "Belphie wanna share what you were dreaming about? We heard you call their name. "

"Only if the network agrees to air it unfiltered. It will be very descriptive."

CM:

CM: "That's a wrap guys."

⬦You might also like: MC's Livestream

#obey me #obey me shall we date #obey me shitpost #obey me humor #obey me headcanons #obey me hcs #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan #obey me satan #obey me asmodeus #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphegor #obey me fic #obey me crack #obey me imagines #◇˖・ﾟ— › cosmic obey me . ⊹ #shitpostcifer

[vioartemis]

Act 5

(Amber Freeman x fem! reader)

Summary: After joining a discord server, you meet a girl... Warnings: (+18), smut, oral, fingering, blood, violence, injuries, characters are 18+ (English isn't my first language, I'm sorry if there are mistakes or if something doesn't make sense TvT)

As far as you could remember, you had always been a horror movie fan. Halloween, Friday the 13th, Saw, The exorcist, Stab... you enjoyed watching these movies. Recently, you had even joined a discord server for Stab fans.

It was really fun talking about these movies with people you knew liked them as much as you did, and it felt nice sharing your passion with others.

There were only two rules in this server: 1. If you were to make video calls, you would all wear Ghostface costumes and masks; and 2. Never, under any circumstances, say your name.

At first you thought that was weird, but it was a matter of safety. Stab fans were considered crazy after what happened in 2011 -and other side events.

Keeping your identity secret had become a must, if you didn't want other people online to hate on you and/or accuse you of crimes.

Fortunately, in the server, no one seemed to have a problem with the rules. And neither did you.

Until that day.

There was this girl on the server, with who you had been talking to in private for some months now. You may or may not had developed a little crush on her.

She was so nice, and it was so easy talking to her. You had the same opinion about almost everything too. But you didn't tell her. What if she thinks I'm weird? you thought.

You were currently on call with her, and the fact that you lived in Woodsboro just slipped.

"Wait- you live in Woodsboro? Me too! Maybe we know each other? What about we meet in real life?"

"I- We're not supposed to do that... Remember the rules? No personal information, so identity reveal or whatever..."

"Yeah, yeah, I know. But you trust me, right? 'Cause I know I can trust you"

"Of course I- I trust you but-"

"Well if we both trust each other, why not meet? It's better talking face to face, don't you think? Plus I'm dying to see what you look like. I'm sure you're super pretty"

You blushed at her words, and stuttered a quiet ‘okay’.

Two hours later, you were waiting in front of the high school, nervous. What if she didn’t like you irl? What if it was awkward? What if-

"Y/n?"

You turned around as you heard your name.

"Amber…?"

You couldn’t help but stare at her. She was gorgeous. The most beautiful girl you had ever seen.

"It’s so nice to finally meet you!" she started "And I was right; you’re really pretty"

You spent the whole day chatting and laughing together. There was definitely chemistry between you too.

"That’s my house" you said softly

You were a little sad your time with her was already over, you wanted make it last more.

"Oh, okay… We’ll meet again, right?"

"Yeah, of course! I’d love to!"

You smiled at each other, and waved goodbye, before you started making your way to the door. But you couldn’t just go like that.

"Amber I-" you started as you turned around

Before you could finish your sentence, her lips were in yours, soft against your own. It took you a second to register what was going on, but soon you were kissing back.

Amber pulled away after a moment. Her lips were inches away from yours, her eyes not leaving your own. Then she leans in for another kiss, more passionate.

Her hands were on your waist, keeping you close, as her tongue slipped past your lips. You made for a while, before running out of air.

When you pulled away, you could see that her lips were red and swollen, and so were yours.

"Maybe we should continue this inside, hm?" Amber said with a light smirk

You blushed and nodded, before trying to open the door. Your hands were shaking a bit in excitement, and Amber being flush against your back, arms around your waist and kissing your neck didn’t help.

Eventually you managed to open the door, and as soon as you closed it behind you both, you got pinned against it, Amber’s lips back on yours.

As the kiss grew more and more feverish, you felt her cold hands sneak under your shirt, and going up to your ribs, stopping right under your breasts.

"Is this okay?" she ask in between kisses

"Yes" you hummed in response

You could feel her smile against your lips as you let out a moan when she groped your tits through your bra. Then, her lips dipped to your neck as her hands made their way under your bra.

Before she could go any farther, you pushed her slightly away.

"Wait- let's go to my room"

You grabbed her hand and led her to your bedroom.

As soon as you were in the room, she reached down for your shirt and took it off you before unclasping your bra and pushing you on your bed. She straddled you, and started to undo her belt with a smirk.

She grabbed your wrists and pinned them above your head, before tying them to the headboard with her belt, making sure it's not too tight.

Then, she sat up and looked down at you, biting her lip.

"Look at you; so pretty all tied up under me..." she whispered, brushing your cheek softly

She leaned in to kiss you once more, her hands sliding down to unbutton your jeans, before going back up to play with your now hard nipples. Again, her lips dipped down to your neck, where she sucked angry red marks.

This, and your nipples being rolled between her fingers made a series of moans leave your throat. You wanted to run a hand through her hair, but with her belt around your wrists, you couldn't move at all -which turned you on even more.

Your eyes flutter closed when you felt her lips wrapping around one of your nipples, and her tongue running over it, before she started sucking gently.

Your back arched slightly as you moaned her name, encouraging her to continue.

After a moment, she released your nipple with a 'pop'. You looked down just in time to see a string of saliva linking her mouth and your hard bud.

She smirked and kissed her way down your body, taking off your pants slowly, her eyes never leaving yours. She took her time, kissing the inside of your thighs, slowly getting closer to where you needed her the most.

You whined at the tease and rolled your hips slightly.

"Amber... please..."

"Please what, baby?" she teased more, sly smirk spread on her face

"Please I need you so bad... please fuck me..."

"How can I say no if you ask so nicely?" she hummed, sliding your underwear down your legs and throwing it somewhere in the room

She looked down at your dripping cunt with a hungry gaze and licked her lips before diving in to get a taste of you.

She hummed against you, loving the way you tasted on her tongue. She hooked her arms around your thighs, keeping you in place while she ate you out.

Her tongue was driving you crazy, you were a moaning mess, and felt you wear already close to the edge. But all of a sudden, she stopped.

You let out a frustrated whine at the sudden loss of contact and pleasure, before she placed her index on your lips.

"Shhh... Don't worry, I'm not done with you"

She quickly replaced her index with her middle and ring finger, which she pushed into your mouth gently.

"Now be a good girl and get my fingers wet"

You complied, and once she was satisfied, pulled her fingers out of your mouth to slide them into your pussy, eliciting another moan from you, before starting to thrust in and out at a fast pace.

If you thought her tongue was skilled, her fingers were even more. She hit all the right spots and curled her fingers just right.

You were so overwhelmed with the pleasure that you couldn't even form a coherent sentence. But she didn't need you to say it to know you were close; she could feel you tighten around her fingers in the most pleasant way possible.

She stopped marking your soft skin and brought her other hand to your throat, squeezing slightly, while her thumb was circling your clit in rhythm with her thrusts.

"Cum all over my fingers, don't hold back"

You came hard, in a white blur, seeing stars as your orgasm crashed in.

Amber continued to fuck you through your high, watching you with a lustful look in her eyes. She had waited so long for that. She had dreamt of it so many times, and now you were truly hers, looking oh so pretty coming undone under her.

When she pulled away, you had recovered enough to see her shove her fingers in her mouth and lick them clean, before leaning in to kiss you lovingly and untying your hands.

"Ready for round 2?" she asked with a smirk

"Fuck yeah" you replied, already taking off her shirt

<><><><> ♡ <><><><>

It had been almost a year since Amber and you were together, and only a few months since Stab 8 was released. Let's just say that you were thrilled to go to the movies together, and that you were terribly disappointed.

You both thought the movie was terrible.

"What are you doing?" you asked gently as you rolled over to your girlfriend, who was scribbling on a paper at the other end of her bed

"I was thinking... Maybe we could do our own Stab movie? Or at least do things to give the producers better ideas. What do you think?"

"What do you have in mind?"

She gave you a slight smirk as she turned to you and exposed her plan.

"So let me get this straight; you want to kill your friend to force her sister -the daughter of Billy Loomis- to come back here, and then kill everybody and blame it on her?"

"That's the idea" she replied, visibly excited "Are you in?"

You sighed and shook your head.

"What wouldn't I do for you, huh?" you smiled and cupped her cheeks to place a soft kiss on her lips "Are you sure we have to kill Tara though? She's my favorite out of all your friends... And if she dies her sister won't necessarily come back"

"You're right! So we just attack her then. Or I just attack her, I don't want to force you into hurting/killing people. I'll do the killing, and you'll make the calls if you want" she offered

"I don't want to let you do all the dirty stuff..."

"Don't worry about that, baby"

She smiled and kissed you again, this time pushing you into the mattress, unbuttoning your jeans and slipping a hand into your underwear with a smirk.

"I don't mind doing the dirty stuff"

Surprisingly, so far, everything went as planned; Amber attacked Tara, her sister cam back to Woodsboro, and the killing spree was continuing. The only thing that wasn't planned on was Sam's boyfriend, but he was just another pawn to kill.

"You ready babe?" Amber asked, adjusting her mask "I kill Judy and Wes, and then I'll go to the hospital to attack Tara and you"

"Don't forget to slash my arm -not too hard if possible!"

You helped her, and pressed your lips at the top of the black mouth of the Ghostface mask as a good luck kiss.

Once again, nothing went wrong. Until the moment where Amber was supposed to slash your arm.

When Tara saw Ghostface behind you, you turned around, just as planned, and lifted your arms up to 'protect' yourself. But instead of feeling the blade on your arm, you felt it sink in your stomach.

Your eyes widened, and you tried to kick her away, a hand on your wound to stop the bleeding.

Why did she do that? you thought, grabbing Tara's wheelchair to head to the elevator. That's not the plan!

Before you could reach it, you got thrown into the nearest wall, hitting your head hard against it.

The shock had the world spinning around you; you struggled to stand properly.

Ghostface took that opportunity to make Tara fall of her wheelchair and was ready to stab her when Sam and Dewey arrived.

You were waiting for Amber to come to the hospital after a nurse called her to warn her you had been hurt. You had so many questions.

When she finally arrived, she looked concerned, worried. She wrapped her arms around you in a tight hug.

"What happened?" she asked

"I don't know, you tell me. You were supposed to slash my arm, not stab me in the stomach...!" you whisper-shouted

"It wasn't me, Y/n..."

You blinked, and pulled away to look at her, confused.

"Fuck you mean it wasn't you...?"

"I couldn't make it to the hospital in time, my car broke down... I never would've hurt you baby..."

She hugged you tighter after saying this.

"If it wasn't you... there's another Ghostface in town..." you whispered

"That's a bad thing for our plan..."

"Not necessarily... If they get caught, we can get away with the previous killings. The police will think they did it too... And we'll be out of suspicions!"

"Yeah but what about our big finale...?"

"Well have to pass on that, I'm sorry my love... But think about it, we'll be the first Ghostface to have survived!"

"You're right baby, both of us living is better than having our ending"

She smile and placed a gentle kiss on your lips.

"Who do you think it is?"

"Hm... It can't be Tara, that's for sure. I don't it's Sam either, or Chad"

"So that leaves Mindy and Liv..."

"And Sam's boyfriend, don't forget about him"

"You’re right, I don’t like him. He didn’t give me a good vibe"

You nod at her words.

"What do we do now? Do we still throw the party?"

"Yeah. If the other Ghostface is a Stab fan too, he’d never miss the occasion to recreate the og party in Stu Macher’s house"

Amber drove you to her house and you both got ready for the party. You had already stolen Tara's spare inhaler when you were in her room before being attacked, so you were sure she would come to Amber's.

And as expected, half an hour after the party begun, Sam, Richie and her came. Your girlfriend dismissed everyone else, and led Tara upstairs to look for her inhaler, leaving you with Sam and Richie.

Mindy was in the living-room, you heard her talk to Liv a few minutes ago, and Chad should be near too.

Sam received a phone call, and Richie walked towards the living-room. You decided to follow him, pretexting you had to rest.

"I'm gonna get some beer, anyone wanna come with me?" he asked after you sat next to Mindy

"No, but you were right to ask!" she replied, her eyes not leaving the tv screen

So he went to the basement alone while you stayed with Mindy watching Stab. When the scene of Randy being attacked arrived, you felt a shiver run down your spine.

While Mindy was busy screaming at Randy to turn around, you looked behind you, just in case.

Ghostface was behind Mindy, ready to stab her. You pulled her away from the knife right before she could get hurt badly, but her shoulder got slashed anyways.

You both screamed, hoping to get the others' attention while you tried to fight the killer. He managed to corner Mindy. You grabbed the lamp next to the sofa and slammed it on his head.

He didn't seem to like it, and punched you in the stomach, reopening your wound. You grunted in pain and pressed a hand on your bleeding stomach.

You were about to come at him again when Sam entered the room, scaring him away. You looked at each other and rush to Mindy, to make sure she was okay. She lost a lot of blood and passed out in Sam's arms.

A scream behind you made you jump. Amber and Tara just came downstairs. Sam opened her mouth to say something but got cut off by a sound of glass breaking; Richie was back, and just dropped his beers.

"Oh my god!" he said

"Where were you?" Sam asked him

"I was getting mor beer!"

"You went to the basement alone?" you girlfriend asked

"I asked them to come with me and they said no!" he replied, gesturing toward Mindy and you

"I was with Tara, and Y/n was with Mindy but the rest of you were wondering around. One of you is the fucking killer!" Amber spat

Liv suddenly barged into the room, looking panicked, hands covered in blood.

"Why is there blood on your hands?" Sam asked her

Liv looked down at her hands and seemed even more panicked.

"I- I found Chad..."

"Chad?"

"He's... he's..."

"You're the killer...!" Richie said

"No I-"

She looked at everyone in the room, seeking support, but neither of you knew if you could trust her.

"I'm not the fucking killer!" she finally yelled

"I know."

You all turned to Richie as he pulled out a gun and shot Liv in the head.

You felt someone grab your hand and drag you away as another gunshot resonated in the room. Amber pulled you upstairs, to her parents' room.

"Are you okay? God, you're bleeding again..."

She started looking for something to bandage you up with, but you stopped her.

"We don't have time, we need to kill him before he can do his speech about his motive, or he'll say that he didn't do the first killings..."

"But-"

"I'm okay, I promise" you reassured her "Let's just make it quick and I'll be fine"

She looked at you hesitantly for a second, before nodding and coming back next to you to place a soft kiss on your lips.

"What do we do now?" she asked

"Do you know where your dad hides his gun?"

Fortunately for the two of you, Sam stabbed Richie to death before he could say anything about another killer, after Amber shot him in the chest.

You made it to act 4, just like Jill Roberts 11 years ago. But you weren't going to screw everything up like she did, no.

And that's how you became the first Ghostface to get away with it, to make it to act 5.

#scream #scream 5 #amber freeman #amber freeman x fem reader #amber freeman x reader #amber freeman smut #amber freeman x reader smut

[eagerbby]

ᴄᴀɴ ᴡᴇ ᴍᴇᴇᴛ? - ᴇᴍ

pairing| Eddie Munson x female reader

synopsis| The year is 1999 and you might, quite possibly, be absolutely head over heels with a stranger you met online. Little do you know, he's not as much a stranger as you first thought.

an| part two to 'can I call you', this has become a series and I'm incredibly thankful for all that read my silly little stories.

warnings| 2k, not much to warn about

Part 1 | part 3

You sent him your number as soon as you got home from work, bounding up the stairs two at a time, locking your door and hurrying to your desktop as soon as you entered your room. Your parents aren’t home, off on some retreat that’s supposed to reinvigorate their marriage, whatever that means. Honestly you didn’t care, you’d spent the whole day watching the clock, waiting for your shift to be over so you could finally go home and talk to Eddie. 

Eddie. You haven’t been able to get him off your mind since you both started talking, which was pretty shocking to you. Couldn’t quite believe how quickly your small communication turned into a full blown friendship, to an unrelenting crush. You didn’t know him, not really, weren’t even sure if he was who he said he was but it didn’t seem to matter. You liked him. 

Your speakers whoosh as you log into AOL, clicking on his name and opening the chat log. Your heart is pattering against your sternum, body vibrating from nerves as you send him your number and a cute message. 

PrettyiNProsed: Can’t wait to hear your voice, pretty boy.

You aren't the type to flirt with strangers over the internet and even after you became friends and your crush grew, you refrained from giving in to his attempts to flirt. It wasn’t easy, not in the slightest, not when it was so tempting to play along. You had a feeling he’d be easy to rile up, he tried to act all sauve, but he wasn’t as smooth as he pretended to be. You were sure of it and you were gonna prove it. 

Your stomach drops when you realize it’s already been twenty minutes, sitting in your computer chair with your brand new phone laid in your lap, silently watching your screen. He's online, you can see that, but he hasn't said anything back and he hasn't called yet. 

What if he doesn't call? Last night you had been so sure he would, he seemed excited, but now he was radio silent. Anxiety made you nauseous, picking at your cuticles and tapping your bare foot against the wooden leg of your desk. The rejection is already sour in your mouth. 

You nearly fall out of your seat as the transparent pink phone in your lap comes to life.  

Ring. Ring. Rin-

“Hello?” Your voice is soft, almost timid, as you listen to the slight ruffle over the line before a goofy chuckle crackles over into your ear. 

“I knew you’d have a pretty voice.” He says, his own voice rich as honey, melodious, with a little huskiness that sends goosebumps rippling across your skin. 

“Yours isn’t so bad either, Eddie.” It comes out a giggle, soft and airy, the smile on your face nearly painful from how wide it is. “I was worried you got cold feet.” 

You can hear the sound of a lighter sparking and the way Eddie’s exhale shakes in his throat. 

“You want the truth?” He asks. You roll your eyes, standing from your chair and walking over to your bed. 

“No, Eddie. I want you to lie to me.” You say, flopping back on your bed as you twirl the cord around a finger. If only you could see the way Eddie’s whole body shivers at the sultry sound of your voice.   

“Well if that's the case…” He trails off and you roll onto your stomach, bare feet kicking in the air. 

“Eddie.” You warn with a roll of your eyes. 

“Okay, okay. I, uh, I needed a couple minutes.” He says.

“A couple minutes to..” You egg him on, biting your lip at the way his little chuckle makes your body tingle. 

“It’s not everyday I get to talk to a pretty girl on the phone, ya know.” He says, avoiding the question at hand. You smile into the phone, cheeks hot, a tornado of butterflies raging in your stomach. 

“Are you sugaring me up, Eddie.” 

“You’re already sweet as sugar, baby.” 

Baby. God, you want to squeal at the word. It sounds like heaven coming from his mouth, making your heart thud hard in your chest. 

“Are you gonna tell me why or not, hm?” 

“You make me nervous, sweetheart.” 

“Me?” You beam, brighter than the midday sun, voice muffled in the palm of your hand but Eddie hears you and laughs soft as a summers breeze. 

“Yeah, you. You could have been an old man or something.” That’s the thing about the world wide web, you never truly know who you’re talking to. Lucky for you, you found Eddie.

“I thought the same about you, Eddie.” You admit, crawling off your bed with the speaker tucked against your ear and shoulder, ambling over to your dresser determined to get out of the itchy dress you wear. You pull out your night clothes and walk back to your bed, putting the phone on speaker as you start to change.

“Oh yeah? And yet you still gave me your number?” He challenges, a smile in his voice, you wonder what he’s doing as you slip out of your diner uniform. 

“I had hope that you were real. Guess I was right.” You toss your dirty uniform into the hamper across the room before pulling the old band shirt on. 

“Guess so. Hey, what are you doing?” 

“I’m changing, I had just got off work when I messaged you. I’ll die if I have to wear this uniform any longer.” After pulling some shorts on you crawl back onto your bed, Eddie’s silent for a couple seconds before he whispers right into the phone. 

“What are you wearing?” 

You laugh so hard you snort, laugh even harder when Eddie tries to take back what he’s said.

“I’m sorry that was weird.”

“Well, do you still wanna know?” 

“If you’ll tell me.” 

“Hmm, okay.” You pull at the black tattered fabric of your shirt, rubbing the fabric between your fingers. “I am wearing an old band shirt and some pink shorts.” 

“Sexy.” He says and then- “What’s the band?” 

“You’re gonna laugh at me.” You say, poking the teddy bear you placed in your lap.

“I promise I won’t, sweetheart.” He coos. 

“It’s a Savage Garden shirt.” 

He laughs so loud you have to pull the phone away from your ear.

“Eddie! You promised!” You whine, covering your face as if he could see you. 

“I’m sorry, baby! I just didn’t expect that.” He’s still chuckling as he says it and despite him breaking his promise you still smile because once again he called you baby. You liked the thought of being his baby.  

“You’re mean, Eddie. You wanna make fun of me? Tell me what you’re wearing, mister!” 

“I’m wearing a Metallica shirt and some black jeans.” Eddie speaks with no enthusiasm and you imagine him in your head.

You picture him being tall, broad shouldered, crazy hair although you can’t picture what color or length. It’s the same with his face, in your mind his features are all a blur, like in a dream when you can see everything but their face. You spend a lot of time trying to imagine certain things about him, putting the pieces together like a puzzle. You knew his interest, knew his heart, knew his voice, the only thing left is to put a face to the man that you knew without a doubt -if given the chance- you could fall for.  

 “Lemme guess,”You ponder, crossing your ankles. “You also have a leather jacket, maybe a denim vest with patches are something and those jeans of yours, which I’m guessing are your favorite out of the handful that you own, have rips in them.” 

Silence over the line and then his voice, soft, comes through. 

“How’d you know?” He says, admiration clear in his tone. 

“I know your type, Eddie.” You grin to yourself, rolling onto your side. The last of the sunset trickles through your window, casting soft orange rays across your carpet. It’ll be gone soon, replaced by a starry sky you wish you could sit under with him. 

“Yeah? How so?” 

“You’re a metalhead, kinda comes with the territory.” 

“I guess so. Here, that just makes me a freak.” 

“I don’t think you’re a freak.” 

“Yeah, I know. That’s what I like about you.” 

“What else do you like about me?” You ask playfully, reaching to turn your bedside lamp on as the sun fades into the horizon. 

“Oh I got a list around here somewhere.” He teases. 

“Oh really, gonna have to show me one day.” 

“Absolutely, sweetheart. Just tell me when and where.” 

When and where. That was your biggest question; where did he live? If it wasn’t too far you’d drive to meet him, buy a room at whatever hotel or motel was around. Even better if he had room for you at his place. Didn’t matter, not really, you’d drive across the country for him. He’d become your best friend in such a short time, it didn’t matter what he looked like or where he was from, you just wanted to be around him.    

“Hey, Eddie?”

“Yeah, sweetheart?” 

“Can I ask you something?” 

“Of course. Anything.”

“Where do you live?” 

He pauses for a second, scuffling making the line static, before he clears his throat and says-

“Hawkins, Indiana. What about you? I-if you wanna tell me. You don’t have to.” 

Shit.

“Did you say Hawkins?” You ask, sitting up in your bed. You stand as he answers, walking over to your window to peek out at the street below. The sun has set, lilac clouds drifting across an indigo sky, the street lights on Maple just turning on.

“Yeah, it’s a smallish hick town like eighty miles outside of Indianapolis. Why?” His voice falls off, wavering with concern. Meanwhile you’ve dropped your phone, digging through the wicker chest at the end of your bed for your highschool yearbook. Once you find it you rush back over and pick up the phone, your hands shaking as you flip to the seniors, searching for his face among your peers. When you find him your heart skips a beat. 

“Long dark hair, big brown eyes, you-” You giggle anxiously, running your finger over his smiling face on the page. “Eddie Munson, your name is Eddie Munson.” 

Eddie’s dead silent and for a second you think he’s hung up, that is until you hear his shaky breath.

“D-Do you live in Hawkins?” He asks, sounding nervous. 

“I do.” 

“Holy shit.” He says, and then again. “Holy fucking shit.” 

“Eddie, you okay?” You ask, sitting down in the middle of your bed, staring down at his picture like you’re speaking to his face. “I’m sorry if I freaked you out.” 

“No, uh, no. I just… You know who I am and I still don’t know who you are.” 

“Oh, you probably don’t remember me. I spent most of my time in the library or with my face buried in a book.” You lean back against your headboard. “I’m looking at your senior photo right now, you know.” 

“Oh god, which year?” He asks with a scoff. 

“‘97. You looked really cute.” You can feel yourself blush, unknown to you, Eddie’s face is bright red. 

“Tell me your last name.” He whispers, but it’s loud, like he's holding the phone right to his mouth. 

“No.” 

“What? W-why?” He stammers, voice now booming through the phone. 

“Are you busy right now?” 

“No…” 

“Wanna meet me at Forest Hills Park?” You’re already slipping your shoes on, finding your purse that you’d thrown as you entered your room earlier. 

“Like, now?” 

“Like, in ten minutes.” 

“You’re… You’re not fucking with me right?” You can hear the uncertainty in his voice and it makes you sad. How many times had he told you about his highschool experience? You knew how badly people treated him. Mostly behind his back, but there were times you’d seen some dumb jock shove him against a locker as they walked past or how theyd scowl at him in the halls, call him and his friends names as they ate their lunch. Eddie didn’t know who you were exactly; only that you knew him. Eddie ‘The Freak’ Munson. That must scare the shit out of him. Like walking into battle without knowing who your enemy is. 

“I’d never do that to you, Eddie. I promise.” You mean it, every word. 

“How will I know if it's you?" He asks and in the background you can hear the metallic clinking of keys. 

“I’ll be the girl in the Savage Garden shirt and booty shorts. Can’t miss me.” This earns you a chuckle and your heart blooms. 

“Okay. I’ll see you then, sweetheart.” 

“I can’t wait.”

#eddie munson fanfic #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson smut #eddie munson x you #stranger things x reader #stranger things smut #stranger things fan fic #eddie munson

[veraghost]

tag teamed! ❤️‍🔥

𝘨𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘢𝘨 𝘵𝘦𝘢𝘮𝘦𝘥 𝘣𝘺 𝘩𝘢𝘪𝘬𝘺𝘶𝘶 𝘥𝘶𝘰𝘴 𝘥𝘳𝘢𝘣𝘣𝘭𝘦𝘴  pt. 2

featuring: f!reader, kuroo + kenma, bokuto + akaashi, ushijima + tendou

cw: sub!reader, voyuerism, fingering, dumbification, penatrative sex, online sex?, male masturbation (tendou), creampies, overstimulation, double cerampie?, multiple rounds, praise, if i’ve missed any please let me know

nsfw under the cut, please have ur age in ur bio or i will block you. 18+

masterlist || rules || send in an ask!

ｋｕｒｏｏ  ＋  ｋｅｎｍａ

“baby?” you ask kenma quietly, hoping he hears you through his headphones. when he pulls his headset off, he quickly nods to you, a silent “what’s up” to you. when you explain to him that you miss his company, he pats his lap, and soon enough your straddling his lap, face nuzzled into his neck. but when your this close to him, feeling the heat radiating off his body, you start to become a little horny.

squirming around in his lap, he looks at you sternly - you’re distracting him from his game. you apologize before finding a comfortable position, right on his dick. he notices your issue almost immediately, and pushes a hand into your panties, playing with your clit.

little do you know that he’s not playing alone, and kuroo and hear your little pants and moans through kenma’s headset, and he can’t help but get off with you. kenma stays quiet while you both find pleasure, enjoying the fact that even after all these years - kuroo is still crushing on his perfect girlfriend. when kenma realizes you’re close, he puts his headphones on your ears, letting you hear how good you make kuroo feel.

you’ve never cum so hard in your life.

ｂｏｋｕｔｏ   ＋   ａｋａａｓｈｉ

“fuck, ‘kaashi she feels so tight, so warm and perfect.” bokuto rants on about your pussy - although he’s fucked you so many times, felt your walls clench around his dick, he never seems to get over how perfect you are. akaashi isn’t surprised over, bokuto always ends up talking about your sexcapades when hes drunk, ranting on about how perfect you are. 

and keiji can’t wait to sink into you, once bokuto reaches his high, when he fills you up to the brim, keiji gets to fuck it back into your sopping cunt, making you see stars. and that’s exactly what he does, it’s messy and wet and everything you should feel disgusted about, but when akaashi is making you cum again and again on his cock, you can’t help but feel completely blissed out, almost passing out from pleasure.

you don’t know how many times you’ve came by the end of the night, but when akaashi finally fills you up, his cum mixing with bokuto’s, when he accidentally brushes against your clit, you’re almost thankful that it’s over, wincing from overstimulation.

ｕｓｈｉｊｉｍａ   ＋  ｔｅｎｄｏｕ

“look at her eyes, ushiwaka, she’s completely fucked out on you” tendou smirks, a teasing tone in his voice. but you can’t even talk back to him, too lost in the feeling of ushijima’s cock hitting the spongy spot in you so easily, almost hitting against your cervix. it’s almost too much, but you can’t even complain, trying to push his hips to make him slow down, but he’s almost as lost as you are.

and tendou get’s to watch it all happen, stroking his cock on his bed, watching from across the room an ushijima fucks into you. this wasn’t how things were supposed to go - not that you should complain. you had simply gone over to wish ushijima good luck on his game later that night, before spilling juice on your chest and suddenly things escalated from there.

you cum for the umpteenth time, eyes crossing and tongue lolling out of your mouth, and tendou cums at the sight, riding his high out with you. it gives ‘toshi a couple more thrusts before he pushes in one last time and cums, filling you up until it’s spilling out of you.

#haikyuu #haikyuu!! #haikyuu smut #haikyu x reader #spicylex #kenma x y/n #haikyuu kenma #haikyuu kozume #hq kozume #kozume kenma #haikyuu kuroo #kuroo x you #kuroo smut #kenma smut #kuroo drabble #hq kuroo #bokuto x female reader #bokuto kotaro x you #bokuto fluff #bokuto smut #haikyu bokuto #hq bokuto #akaashi keiji #akaashi x reader #akaashi x you #haikyuu akaashi #hq akaashi #haikyuu ushijima #ushijima wakatoshi #hq ushijima

[thewertsearch]

CEB: wait… CEB: are you saying that vriska is interested in me? CEB: like, romantically?

I think she thinks she likes you, the same way she thought she liked Tavros. In her eyes, you're a potential replacement for him, which is a dangerous position to be in.

In short: yes. But watch out!

CTG: do you like her CEB: well, like i said, i thought she was pretty cool… CEB: kinda bossy! but also pretty friendly. CTG: yeah ok CTG: but i mean CTG: anything more than that CTG: like CTG: if earth wasnt destroyed and she werent in some other universe on a planet full of unspeakable frothing dipshits CTG: and she was on earth visiting your town or something CTG: would you want to ask her to go see one of your dumbass movies

Dave is actually helping John talk through his feelings, which is sweet as all hell. His instincts around this are surprisingly good, too - it probably would help John to separate his feelings about Vriska from his current situation.

Try to divorce yourself from the session, just for a second. You're not John the Player - you're John the teenager, and a girl likes you.

What do you think about her?

CEB: i don't think i have ever actually liked a girl before in that way, so i am not really sure what i am supposed to feel or do…

Grew up in a small town in Suburbia, USA.

Raised by a single father who struggles to relate to him.

No extended family to speak of, unless you count the ecto-sister he learned about an hour ago.

Has a social circle consisting of three online besties, and never mentions any IRL friends.

Uses stilted phrases like 'not a homosexual', and is so confused by his own feelings that he can't identify a crush.

John Egbert is a very sheltered kid, is what I'm getting at. I wouldn't be surprised if Karkat and Vriska were the first people who ever had crushes on him. This is all completely new to John, and I don't think has the slightest idea how he's supposed to respond.

Dad's great, but if John asked him for relationship advice, he'd tell his son to get a decent aftershave and a well-pressed suit. He's flying blind, and things will only get more complicated from here on in.

CTG: did one of the human ladies reject you ?CG: OF COURSE NOT. CTG: how did it go did you stand in a quadrant like you were playing four square CTG: holding a bucket full of flowers or slime or whatever and jade was like no thanks bro

I mean, he might have started with John, but he seems to hate Jade quite a lot, too.

We now know this was after his confession to John. Maybe it was a rebound?

CTG: or maybe it was a guy who rejected you ?CG: FUCK OFF. CTG: haha wow bingo CTG: see how i look right now thats a poker face might want to take some notes ?CG: I SEE NOTHING BUT A COWARD BEHIND DARK EYEWEAR CLEARLY DESIGNED FOR WOMEN AND A PAIR OF IMPUDENT LIPS PURSED SO TIGHT IT'LL SOUND LIKE AIR SQUEALING OUT OF A BALLOON WHEN I PUNCH YOU IN THE GUT.

Pursed lips?

Karkat. No, Karkat, look at me. Do you have a little crush on all the human kids?

You do, don't you. Oh my god, you do. Just stay away from Rose, or Kanaya will chainsaw you in half.

?CG: AND JOHN, PURELY HYPOTHETICALLY, IF ONE OF US IN THE FUTURE DOES MAKE SOME SORT OF SOLICITATION YOU DON'T QUITE UNDERSTAND… ?CG: BECAUSE OF PERHAPS SOME CULTURAL DIFFERENCES ?CG: I MEAN NO ONE IN PARTICULAR HERE ?CG: MAYBE TRY TO UNDERSTAND THAT PERSON MIGHT NOT BE THINKING TOO CLEARLY AT THAT MOMENT

Karkat, you're killing me here. I'm dying. You don't get any Boondollars from killing a liveblogger, Karkat.

#homestuck liveblog #full liveblog #act 5.2 #s69 #2790

[guillotinebypierre]

Kim Chaewon.

Ex- IZ*ONE member and now the leader of kpop monster rookies LE SSERAFIM. All that at the young age of twenty-two.

Back in April 2021, when the day of judgement, as many netizens like to call it, came, many were asking what would become of the girls Korea and the rest of the world knew and loved.

Fast forward a year and a half and you got your answer: they remained relevant, with some of them even being direct competitors nowadays.

With her already established fanbase, her cute and sexy looks and the sheer size of the company that HYBE or BigHit, if you want to be old school, is, nobody questioned whether or not LE SSERAFIM would be successful once they fearlessly rolled up on the kpop scene.

Success was almost immediate, with records being broken left and right, one song charting better than the other and online following growing.

With that also came a busier schedule.

A busier schedule that Kim Chaewon had to juggle amidst a secret relationship.

A secret relationship you ask? Well, turns out that Chaewon was never really alone after IZ*ONE went separate ways. Quite the opposite actually. Back when she had noone, you appeared.

Y/n L/n. The newly introduced member of already established boy group NCT. The maknae, being 17 years of age when first brought to the scene in 2020.

Y/n L/n, the same man many people, celebrities and netizens alike, are calling "Korea's Golden Boy" and "Korea's IT Boy", even though he is a foreigner.

Back in 2021, when you heard the news of IZ*ONE disbanding during a VLive...

-Flashback, 29 April 2021, the IZ*ONE incident-

"-yeah so as I was saying I'm really excited for our new comeback! Producing with Mark-hyung has been going very smoothly and I've been having so much fun", Y/n said while scrolling through Twitter on his phone.

Suddenly his heart stops beating for a second. His mouth opens, tears starting to form in his eyes. He stared at his phone and with every passing second it felt like his world was being crushed.

He couldn't believe it.

The chat was going crazy. The viewers weren't dumb. Anybody in the fandom knew that Y/n was a WIZ*ONE .He had been caught buying their albums multiple times. Fans had spotted him with a lightstick at their concerts before and he always ran around with a photocard of a different member in his phone case. Anyone with a pair of functioning braincells and access to social media at that moment could guess why the boy was suddenly so distraught.

"No fucking way this is true. This can't- this can't be true. I don't want to fucking believe it!", Y/n screamed as he threw his phone away, at this point not even giving a fuck whether he could curse on live or not.

"Now what the hell am I supposed to do? I was having such a good day and then I have to see some bullshit like this? What was the reason man? What about the girls?", he said while now pacing around his room.

"I'm sorry guys but I have to end the live sooner then expected. I'll catch you tomorrow, please take care of you and stay safe!"

He immediately went through his following list on Instagram and decided to text the person he cared for the most.

"Hey Chaewon are you alright? I just saw the news and I want to tell you that I'm here for you if you ever need anything. I know we've only talked on music shows before but you and your members inspired me so much, I really care deeply for you girls. Take care of yourself and stay safe, love you :)"

As soon as he hit send he wanted to punch himself in the face.

"This is so corny WHY DID I SAY 'LOVE YOU' "

Just as he went into the chat and wanted to unsend the message, he saw that Chaewon was typing

"Hey, Y/n. Thank you for the kind message, I really appreciate you. I'm not doing all too well right now, would you mind giving me your number? I really need someone to talk to right now."

-Flashback end-

Ever since then Y/n's and Chaewon's relationship started blossoming. He stood by her through everything. Through the lowest moments she had, the many panic attacks and sleepless nights, but also through her highest moments, like her (new) debut.

They started dating a few months after they started talking and to Y/n, Chaewon was the closest anything or anyone would ever get to 'perfection'.

Every moment he spent with her was like a gift from god himself to Y/n. He cherished every second with her, no matter how insignificant. Every time she called him he would pick up, any message she sent would be replied to almost instantly.

In short, he was completely, with his entire being, heads over heals for the small fearless girl.

He loved everything about her. Her cute face, pure skin, her beautiful nose.

Her cheeks that looked like cheeseballs, her full lips, her perfect eyebrows.

Whenever he slept over he would wake up extra early just to stare at her face a bit longer.

And that brings us to the point we are at right now.

With Chaewon's aforementioned growth in popularity there was bound to be activities that would be held outside of her mother country South Korea.

Today she had a flight to Japan to do a shoot for a popular magazine. The flight was at three in the afternoon, which means in five hours, and everything was already packed. All she needed to do was to make sure she started her trip to the airport atleast three hours before the flight itself, which means she only has two hours left.

"Where do you thing you're going, baby?", a raspy voice called out to her as soon as she tried getting out of bed

That person whomst the voice belonged to got up and continued saying

"Chaewon I'm serious please come back to bed I barely saw you last week, I still need you baby."

"Y/n, no. I need to get going, my flight is in a few hours. And I know that if I lay down next to you I'll start doing things that will make my time schedule significantly ", Chaewon argued.

"I'm not even going to question what you mean by that but come back to bed please. Don't make me get up and carry you back."

"I would love to see you try."

Not being one to turn down a challenge, you swiftly stood up with newfound energy and swooped your girlfriend off of her feet and threw her on the bed before laying down on top of her.

"Yah Y/n I can't breathe move you pabo", Chaewon whined.

"I'll move if you give me a kiss"

"I'm not falling for that again, the last time you bargained like that I had to wear make up for a week straight on my neck because your 'kiss' led to you sucking in my neck and giving me hickeys. Now move baby please"

"I'll move if you stay just five more minutes with me in bed"

"Y/nn we both know that those five minutes will quickly lead to something else thats gonna be a lot longer than just five minutes. Please just move."

"If I move you'll try to get out"

"I promise I won't"

Chaewon looked you in the eyes and used a forbidden tactic, the puppy eyes.

You both knew you couldn't resist, so reluctantly, you gave in.

However, as soon as you moved off she tried getting away. Having seen that from a mile away, though, you grabbed both of her hands and held them above her head.

"I thought you wouldn't move away jagi? Why lie to me this early in the morning? I think this calls for some type of punishment, don't you think?", Y/n told her

"Y/n I don't think now is the time I mean what if I miss my- Ahhh"

Not even listening to Chaewon's worries you immediately latch on to her sweet spot.

"Y-Y/n please- Ahh please slow down with the marks I have a photoshoot later on and I didn't plan on making it known that we're a thing today", Chaewon told you.

"You know baby, you tell me to stop marking you but you're pressing my head even harder against your neck. I don't believe you", Y/n said before diving down and giving her more hickeys.

Chaewon tasted sweet. You did not know whether that was due to her natural scent or because of some bodywash she just used, all you knew was that it is addictive.

"Chae take that shirt off immediately."

Chaewon, being caught off guard by your sudden request fumbled a bit and took some time to lift the shirt of her body.

You, however, could not wait any longer so you just ripped the shirt in half

"Hey that was expensive-" "I'll buy you as many of these as you want just let me lick your body right now", Y/n interrupted her.

You continued sucking on her skin, making sure to enjoy and cherish every single second while also making sure to tease her by skipping her breasts.

Just as she was about to complain you delve down and took in her left nipple into your mouth, the sudden warm sensation giving her some form of satisfaction she had been yearning for ever since you started attacking her body with your tongue.

Kissing, nibbling, biting and sucking on her light brown nipples while making sure to use your hand on the other one.

After a while you switched and made sure to give the other nipple the same treatment.

Chaewon was a mess at this point. Head pressing back into the pillow, eyes rolled backwards, back arched, using one of her hands to press your head even deeper into her body while the other scratched your now bare back.

You noticed a switch in her attitude, however. Her grip tightened, her breathing became even more uncontrolled and messy and she was louder.

So you stopped and raised your head a bit to admire the state your girlfriend was in.

"What did you really think I would let you come that quick baby? I still haven't forgiven you for rejecting me this morning because of this stupid flight.", Y/n said while smirking at her.

"Y/n what the f-aAHH" "Wow you're this wet just because of my mouth? You know, this is making me really hungry. I hope you don't mind me having breakfast in bed Chae.", You cut her off by putting your hand on her (still) covered, wet pussy.

You got back to your earlier position, this time going further down and licking and kissing her entire midsection.

Chaewon was proud of her abs and you were too so you made sure she got the notice.

Reaching the main attraction, you started by kissing along her thighs, licking and nibbling at her skin while ignoring her wet core.

You took a pillow and placed it under her lower back and then, finally, took off her panties with your mouth, while making sure to hold eye contact with the sweating, blushing mess infront of you.

After taking her underwear off you were greeted by a familiar sight, Chaewon's tight, pink pussy.

She was wet and you were thirsty, so of course you dove straight in. You licked around her labia before finding her clit and sucking on it.

You pressed down on Chaewon's stomach and just like that it was like a waterfall of sweet nectar opened into your mouth. You lapped up as much as you could, like a thirsty dog, not wanting to waste any of her juices.

You knew Chaewon was still sensitive but that didn't matter to you. You continued eating her out while now also fingering her, a combination that ultimately culminated with a second orgasm for Chaewon.

"That was just- wow Y/n", Chaewon said while panting.

"Let me repay the favor", she added with newfound strength flipping you on your back.

Chaewon slowly slid down your now exposed upper body, making sure to leave some marks of her own on your abs until finally getting to the main course.

Your erection was painfully obvious by now as your girlfriend was able to see the bulge.

Not wanting to waste any time, she pulled your pants and underwear down in one swift motion and was immediately hit in her face by your member.

She slowly kissed the tip, taking little cat licks on your head while innocently looking up and meeting your eyes.

Seeing the look of lust and desperation in your eyes, she decided it was enough teasing and in one go took most of your dick inside her mouth.

"Oh my god Chaewon you're doing me so well baby", Y/n moaned while throwing his head back.

Chaewon smiled at the sudden compliment and now added a second hand to the equation with which she stroked the part of your shaft that didn't fit inside her mouth.

The room was filled with slurping noises as Chaewon, filled with your cock, produced what seemed like litres of saliva that was now both coating your entire cock and her chin, slowly dripping down onto the mattress.

Your moaning and groaning never stopped, however Chaewon felt you pulsate inside her mouth, which gave her all the information she needed.

In one brave motion Chaewon forced your entire member into her mouth, making it hit the very back of her throat and that seemed to push you over the edge, making you erupt like a geyser inside her, painting her throat white and filling her stomach with your warm and sticky seed.

"God bless you for being a fitness freak and having a healthy diet because you taste amazing baby", Chaewon replied after opening her mouth to show you that she swallowed all of it.

"That was- wow Chaewon I thought I'd black out for a minute right there", Y/n replied while breathing heavily.

Chaewon smiled at the comment and slowly made her way into Y/n's lap.

"If you thought that was mind blowing you'll actually pass out during the main course."

She straddled Y/n and slowly inserted his cock into her hungry pussy.

Both of them threw their heads back, almost in sync, overwhelmed with the pleasure.

Y/n looked at Chaewon and it was like he fell in love for the first time again. The way the light bounced off her face, highlighting her nose and her shiny lips. The way her eyes were shut closely while her mouth hung open.

Everything about her is just perfect.

So perfect that a switch turned on in Y/n's brain. A switch that made his hormones go overboard.

He embraced Chaewon with his strong arms and pushed her close into his body, thrusting up with all his might and immediately making her moan.

"Ugh- righ- right there Y/nn. You're dOing me so good babY~", Chaewon praised him.

Y/n got faster and harder. He held his girfriends petite frame delicately while absolutely destroying her pussy.

The subtleness of the moans now completely out of the window as Chaewon was screaming so loud Y/n wouldn't be surprised if any people passing by their street heard her.

In moments like these Y/n thanked himself for exercise because he managed to built up a very strong stamina throughout the years.

Meanwhile Chaewon was scratching his back, surely drawing blood at this point, while also pressing her head against his traps and biting them as a way to silence her moans.

To Y/n this was an indicator that she was close to her second orgasm of the morning, so he removed one arm from her back and started playing with and rubbing her clit.

Almost instantly, resembling a dam being broken, Chaewon squirted, drenching Y/n's midsection and their sheets with her love juices.

Chaewon was on cloud nine, overwhelmed by pleasure. Pleasure, that did not stop as Y/n continued pounding the small woman into oblivion.

"Y- Y/nn AHHH I'm sti-lL sensitive-", she said while gripping hard against his back with her remaining strength.

Y/n, however, didn't care as he now flipped both of them, laying Chaewon on her back and fucking her in a mating press position.

The overstimulation was too much and so Chaewon reached her climax again.

Her back arched like a cat, her legs violently shook, her nails dug deeper into Y/n's muscular back and her eyes rolled even further back into her skull.

Her mouth hung open, tongue out and moaning the name of her lover.

Y/n felt Chaewon's insides clench, sucking him in like a vacuum and making him hit even further depths than before. He felt every single crevice of her inner walls as he relentlessly pounded into the love of his life.

Soon Y/n felt a familiar feeling coming.

The burning sensation in his core, the pulsating of his cock, it all pointed towards one inevitable thing.

"Chae-" "INSIDE- OHHH", Chaewon cut him off

Y/n's thrusts started becoming slower and slower, sloppier in their execution until he gave one last deep thrust and started flooding Chaewon's insides with his warm fluids.

It was like a waterfall, seemingly endless as he dumped every last drop inside his girlfriend, who came again due to the warm feeling inside her.

Y/n stayed in position for a good 50 seconds until finally pulling out and taking a good look at the mess he created.

His girlfriend was sprawled out, a sweaty mess, messy hair sticking to her forehead but most importantly, leaking his cum.

The bedsheets were completely ruined, drenched in a mixture of cum and sweat from the both young lovers.

He looked at Chaewon and saw her glistening skin, her perky chest rising and falling and the satisfied grin on her face while looking at him.

Y/n smiled back but suddenly the smile turned into a frown as he looked at the bedside table.

"Chae what time did you say you had to leave again?", Y/n asked while slowly walking into the bathroom.

"What do you mean- OH MY GOD Y/N I SWEAR TO GOD I WILL KILL YOU", Chaewon screamed as she looked at the clock next to her and saw that it was one thirty in the afternoon.

She sprinted through her room and took the quickest shower you had ever seen.

Knowing what would come next, you also washed yourself and put on better clothes.

"You will drive me to the airport and you better pray to god that I don't miss this photoshoot or else you won't fuck me for a whole MONTH", your girlfriend scolded you as you walked into the parking lot of the HYBE building.

"Hi Seonghyun-hyung? Yeah it's me Y/n. I'm with Chaewon right now and I wanted to call to tell you that we won't make it to the airport on time because of traffic. I'm really sorry for the circumstances but is there any way we could reschedule the photoshoot for a few hours? We will still be flying today but we won't be there on time.", Y/n told Chaewon's manager while sweating as he saw his girlfriend stare daggers into him.

-Time skip to a few hours later at the airport-

Chaewon was still somewhat ignoring Y/n while using her phone instead until she suddenly got a message from her members.

Fearless group chat

Jen🦒: Yah Chaewon unnie a lot of HYBE trainees have complained about the noise earlier this morning. You and a certain Y/n wouldn't know anything about that would you?👀

Kkura🌸: Ohh he did you good again didn't he Chae? By the way the trainees described it it sounded like someone was getting murdered inside your room😂😭

Zuha🦢: Not someone, something unnie. It wasn't our 🐆 fho, more like her 🐱 🫣🫢

Jen🦒: ZUHA😭😭😭ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ

Kkura🌸: @/Chaechae🐆 the fake maknae is being rude are you really gonna take that?👀👀

Zuha🦢: Unnie I don't think she can take much more after what Y/n oppa gave her earlier this morning😭😭😭ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ

Jen🦒: 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Kkura🌸:🤣🤣🤣😭😭😭😭

Manchae🐈: Chaewon unnie when will we see Y/n oppa again?

Jen🦒: Yes unnie I would love to spend some time with Y/n too🫣🫢

Kkura🌸: Me2👀😶

Zuha🦢: Me3 Unnie🥰

Chaewon sighed and grabbed Y/n's arm

"Baby I'm happy we're talking again but where are you bringing me?"

"I'm frustrated, horny and the VIP lounge has champagne.", Chaewon quickly replied

"Frustrated, horny and champagne? This reminds me of that thing we did when fearless got its first win. Remember that time I wet you down with champagne?", Y/n replied while smirking.

"Yes and we're doing it again. Now.", Chaewon smirked back and went into the private jet with Y/n and the bottle of champagne she got from the VIP lounge.

--------------------------------------------------------------

#kpop fanfic #kpop imagines #kpop smut #kpopfap

[sn00pism]

"Do you have a heart? Within."

WC! Kunigami Renskue x reader

He was handsome, that you'd give him.

But oh God was he an asshole.

You really hated his guts, at least you thought you did, maybe annoyance was the word for what he made you feel? You couldn't stand rude or mean people, you really didn't get what his problem was.

However, when you asked Chigiri, the Kunigami that Chigiri described was with him in the Blue Lock program was a completely different person than the one you had interacted with the last few weeks in class. Maybe somehing happened to him? You didn't know exactly what but it must have been terrible for him to do 'a complete 180' as Chigiri described. You really wanted to stop paying attention to him, stop interacting with him, yet you couldn't help glancing his way when he entered your shared class.

Something that drew you to him, maybe you were kind of a masochist? Those BL manhwas were starting to get into your head. Daydreaming about this rude guy, built like a brick, mean to everyone but you, traumatised by something terrible. You could fix him. And as much as you wanted to convince yourself you could, it was anything but realistic.

Kunigami looked down on everyone and mostly stayed out of your way when you came over to study with Niko or Chigiri, yet, you found your eyes never leaving his figure when he exited his room, eyes glued to his toned arms and, dare you say, pretty face. Maybe you were delusional, always bringing stuff to share with them and without realising it, getting him something too even if you knew he wouldn't take it. You couldn't help being kind to him even if he proved to be indifferent to you gestures.

Seriously, what the everloving fuck was wrong with you? You'd be better off liking someone like Yoichi from your mandatory sports class or even Yukimiya from english literature, but you had to get your eyes on the rudest, most insufferable guy on campus.

In an effort to completely put distance between you and Rensuke, you stopped studying over to their dorm, opting for going to a small café near campus and changing your seat over to the far back.

As a few weeks passed by, you kind of forgot about your small infatuation with Rensuke. After all, I seemed it was nothing short of a crush.

In this past weeks, you began speaking with a guy in your class, doing some paper on the hero's journey in fiction books, you grew closer quickly and before you knew it, you had a date.

This of course prompted you to talk about it excitedly with your friends, during a break you had from class. And later on, bragging about it to Ryusei, who complained about not scoring a date with Rin's brother of all people.

And as the day came, you found yourself waking up slightly earlier to get ready, your make-up and outfit casual but sweet, nothing too big or flashy.

Once you got there, no one had arrived at the place you were supposed to meet in.

He's probably late, after all you're thirty minutes early. You'll wait.

After twenty minutes had passed from the time you'd agreed on, you began getting anxious, checking your phone for any messages or calls you might have missed from him but none arrived. Deciding to call him up, immediately noticing he had been online a few minutes ago. The call went unanswered, a simple 'sorry, I think we are not a good match.' following up in the message app you had been checking for the last twenty minutes.

Are you serious?

You began to feel stares on you, couples whispering to each other while looking in your direction. Maybe it was your anxiety, but you couldn't shake the sadness that washed over you like a wave, drowning you in self-doubt and insecurities.

Was something wrong with you? Was it that you came on too strong? Were you boring? Weird?

Sighing and preparing to leave, ego bruised and tears of humiliation begining to appear in your lashline, someone sat right in front of you.

A voice you recognized apeaking up over the chatter of the place.

"Hey"

"Come to laugh at me, Rensuke?"you bit you lip, tears threatening to fall. "Really not in the mood now," you looked down, the first tears sliding down your cheeks "Please just go.." you spoke, your voice was barely above a whisper. You seriously felt like just going home and crying while playing a funny Ryan Gosling movie to cheer you up slightly.

"Now why would I do that?" You stared at him dumbfounded, "I'm here to keep you company while I rest." He flagged down a waiter, ordering a piece of your favourite cake and a glass of water, "Besides, really needed some water, forgot mine."

You scoffed softly, although it sounded more like sigh, "You don't eat sweets, what are you really doing?" You looked up at him, drying your cheeks and looking down at you hands. You didn't want to look at him more than necessary, each time you looked at him, your heart began to beat a like faster, but you didn't want to make assumptions that he was here for you, besides, the pain of being rejected and stood up was still fresh in your chest.

Rensuke looked at you, seemingly bored, but never taking his eyes off you.

"Are you done interrogating me?," he thanked the server gruffly, taking a fork and a small piece of the cake. "I was just on my run and happened to see you." he psuhed the fork near you, motioning for you to take the utensil, "Heard you talking to Shidou the other day, weren't you supposed to be on a date?" you took the fork and took the bite, it made you feel a little better.

You looked back at him, immediately noticing that his hair was slightly damp and there was some sweat sliding down his neck and face. "But this place is far from your dorm, you're telling me you went out of your route to get some water?" your heart raced in your ribcage, hoping he had done that romantic thing the main leads do when they realise they like the protagonist and chase after her, but you didn't want to get you hopes up, look where that got you. That was fiction after all, this was real life and the facts are that you got rejected because of whatever reason and Kunigami probably hated you along with ninety percent of the campus population. Your shoulders sagged in dissapointment as another wave of sadness rushed out of nowhere.

"I did, yeah." He looked away, sighing at you defeated state. Maybe this was his fault, maybe he should've said something sooner to avoid this mess. He took a swig of his water.

You looked at him with a small frown, motioning to his half empty glass, "You're free to go then, won't keep you hostage any longer." Kunigami shook his head, looking out the window next to you, "It's fine, I'll wait for you to finish up."

He turned his head towards you bored, emotionless eyes staring directly into yours. There was something different on his eyes you had never noticed before, did he want to say something?

Kunigami found that he couldn't stop the words from leaving his mouth, the feeling of almost losing you because of this stupid date, the fact that his chest ached when he found you sitting far away from him in class, the way he wouldn't see you in the dorms, studying or watching anime with Niko. Before he knew it, he had to come to accept the fact that he liked you. Every small glimpse he could get of you around campus felt like a breath or air on his strained lungs, he longed to find you waiting for his football practice to finish, looking towards the bleachers hoping to see your figure waving at him, but he never got the courage to even accept these feelings. He wanted to erase them, go back to the machine they had designed him to be, cold-hearted, mean. A wall had erupted between everyone and his feelings, yet you broke through it like it was made of glass, and all it took was a smile. Whenever you went to study, you'd buy them snacks, you got him something everytime, even if he never showed any affection to you. Before he knew it, you had him completely hooked. The old Kunigami resurfacing, soft, firm but gentle.

"I came here, because I was worried.. I just.." He ran his fingers through his disheveled hair. "You probably hate me, and won't want to hear what I have to say... but please just hear me out, you can tell me to piss off if you want after I finish." You sat looking at him stunned, you had never seen Kunigami act so different, he seemed almost desperate to say whatever he wanted to tell you. You nodded at him to keep going. This was weird.

His eyes softened "I like you." He dropped his head into his hands, the weight of his words and feelings sinking into his heart, thoughts of you leaving him there, rejecting him, distancing yourself from him even more had his chest thightening. He found it hard to breathe. The glass wall broke, his feelings flooded him like a wave, had you created a gap between you and him because you hated him in the first place? Had he said something wrong? Mean? Had he pushed you away the way he pushed his friends away? The thought made hot tears line in his eyes, breath shaky. He swallowed, trying to calm his racing mind and heavy heart, "I'm sorry, I never wanted to be mean or rude to you, I like you so much."

You blinked, you had never seen Kunigami cry. You reached over to grasp his hands buried in his face, gently peeling them away from his cheeks, warm and wet with tears, your heart raced and a small smile made its way into your face. Kunigami looked up at you, misty eyes looking into your softened eyes, waiting for the blow that would make his heart break again.

"I like you too." The words stunned Kunigami and he shook his head, heart stuttering in his chest against his will. "No you don't, I know you don't..." his eyes watered again, looking down to you joined hands as you reached one to cup his face, "Yes, I do" Kunigami looked up at you, seeing the smile in your face, warm, sincere.

"Then why-?" you didn't let him finish his question, shaking your head and looking down. "I was being stupid, should've told you how I felt since the start instead of playing around." You smiled at him, gripping his hand again, "How about we go and watch a movie? I think that'll be a good first date, don't you think?"

Kunigami stared at you for a second before his lips broke out into a slight smile, eyes full of warmth, heart sighing in relief and happiness. How long has it been since he felt this at ease? Always looking to be better, pushing his limits, withdrawing from connecting with others to avoid getting too close, letting them get too close.

"Yeah, I'd like that."

it's been a hot minute since I wrote anything in english, let alone fiction. I'm sorry if the pacing is kind of weird, I'm kind of used to slow burn and I kinda rushed this one, I'm sorry!

Thanks to @pinksodacan for being my beta reader and editor! Eternally grateful bub.

#blue lock #bllk #bllk x y/n #blue lock scenarios #blue lock x reader #bllk kunigami #blue lock kunigami #kunigami x reader #kunigami rensuke #kunigami x you

[hausofanya]

┈─ 𖧷 HAVE YOUR RAMEN AND CRY IN IT ﹕ THE SPICY RAMEN BREAKDOWN. set after STRAY KIDS survival show. genre, so much feelings. ( talk to me. suffering in silence is futile to growth. ) featuring chan, two bowls of buldak, and a hopeful turn for the better.

two hours. two hours spent encased in a glass box with nothing to show for it but a strained voice and wasted time. she can feel the weight of her own dissatisfaction hanging heavy on her shoulders, gaze dropping to the floor as a hastily shoved on baseball cap obscures her view.

two hours of his wasted time, too. but he’d never say it to her face. he was too nice.

‘you’ve almost got it!’ his voice crackles in through the speakers, and she thinks she nods, or does some kind of head jerk to indicate she heard him. her gaze doesn’t move from the floor. ‘we’re gonna run it back one more time, alright?’

she wonders if he knows about the whispers they get when people think nobody’s listening. about the girl who wasn’t talented enough to debut in a ‘proper group’, so jyp stuck her with the ‘experimental one because he didn’t know what to do with her’. that she knows what people say online about her — attention seeking, crybaby, whore — and that she spends her nights scrolling through forums instead of getting her hours in. the makeup artists are starting to get frustrated with her, she knows, but she can’t stop.

if she really was the ‘golden voice’ of her school, where’s all that talent gone? she sounds like a shattered record lol. my two year old sister can sing better than that. kick her out omg

she probably slept with someone high up to have debuted in that group. and it’s not even like they’re famous anyway so why bother? just seems like a lot of effort going nowhere imo

honestly glad survival shows exist bc u can really see it’s mostly just looks. yeah she’s pretty but that’s all she’s got going for her. most she’ll get is maybe two years and then a flop acting career.

she’d stewed over that last comment for days. even now, where she’s supposed to be improving, she can’t stop thinking about those comments, despite standing on her little soap box mere hours ago when hyunjin had expressed his own uncertainties. she’d sat there and listened and kept her own nasty swirl of fears buried deep enough.

hypocrite. but fake it until you hopefully make it, right?

cléo starts back from the top once more, turned away from the eyes boring into her body on the other side of the glass. trapped, like a caged zoo animal. she’s suddenly glad there aren’t any cameras rolling.

paper clutched in her hands, her voice wavers in the slightest but she’s able to get through most of the lyrics with no trouble. hope crawls a treacherous path from the balls of her feet and up to her heart. arms weak, it snags on any surface it can hold on to; a perfectly pitched riff, a smoothly sung chorus. and just when it finds the light, the end of the song just in reach—

her voice cracks. again, and again, and again.

no matter how many times she insisted on getting that one particular note right, her voice leaves her swiftly without second thought, all her progress depleting. hope trips and tumbles painfully back to the uneven ground. the paper crinkles in her hands, giving way easily from repeating crushing.

cléo takes a shaky breath and blinks back tears of frustration, quickly reaching up to wipe at her eyes under the guise of brushing her hair away from her face. ( she’s not fooling anyone, she knows. ) when she sneaks a look back at outside, she sees no one else in that room but him. her chest cinches painfully.

just as she’s about to try once more, his voice crackles in before she’s able to get a sound out.

‘cléo.’ she hesitates, but turns despite every muscle in her body screaming at her not to.

chan’s expression is unreadable, but she can tell he’s not .. mad. or frustrated, or even pissed. which confuses her because she’s one hundred percent sure he heard every second of her disaster attempt at a recording.

he doesn’t say anything for a moment, staring at her with the same unreadable expression, and her skin itches from being analyzed so closely. her gaze falls back to the floor before her eyes squeeze shut to prevent from crying.

‘are you hungry?’

huh? cléo swallows nervously and tries her best to scale her confusion back, absolutely sure he was going to comment on her lackluster abilities. she’s too late in answering what was probably a rhetorical question anyway.

‘man, i’m starved.’ chan then smiles at her through the glass, her eyes stinging from the warmth radiating through the barrier. ‘i could probably eat a horse at this rate. let’s go eat, yeah? my treat.’

🍜

one convenience-store-and-stray-cat-finding trip later, and cléo finds herself watching in budding amusement as chan tries and fails to act as if his mouth isn’t on fire.

when he’d told her he’d get the two of them whatever she wanted to eat, she’d suggested ramen because it was easy to make and didn’t require a lot of things to cook. besides waiting for the eggs to boil in his tiny little kitchen, the ramen was the best choice of a late night meal.

except .. she hadn’t been clear on how spicy it was. and she paid the price by watching in horror, at first, to see chan’s ears turn bright red — near cartoon-esque — to poorly hidden mirth as he down his second ( third ? ) cup of milk while her bottled water remained unopened.

“you’re trying to kill me, i know it,” chan groans weakly, and scoffs loudly when it makes her stifle a laugh. “you’re laughing. i’m seconds away from my deathbed, and you’re laughing. cléo.”

it’s the mention of her name that finally makes her crack, bursting into a fit of giggles that nearly make her fall over in her chair. it brings tears to her eyes out of how weak her body becomes soon after, unlike the tears and sniffling coming from her companion’s lack of spice tolerance. he puffs out his face in faux anger and it sends her into another round of laughter, clutching her stomach as she pleads for him to stop.

red cheeked but amused by her good mood, chan slowly eases the both of them into amicable conversation, steering clear from her ruined studio session. but the memories coming rolling back in despite his best efforts, and she goes from smiling and laughing to slowly answering with one worded responses, her expression closing shut.

silence hangs in chan’s tiny kitchen. cléo struggles to keep her breathing leveled.

it only takes one look and a gentle toned calling of her name for the first tears to stain her shirt, shoulders hunched up to her ears. her baseball cap long forgotten, she can’t hide from him even if she wanted to. shaking hands still attempting anyway — wiping furiously at tired eyes before his hands slowly pull them away least she hurt herself.

when she looks up at him, trembling nervously, she’s hit with the amount of concern and sadness mixed in his expression. and that’s what hits the final nail in the coffin, her resolve crumbling before she bursts into tears.

chan rubs her back soothingly as it spills out of her without warning, his head resting on top of hers. she tells him about her worst fears, the resentment she held towards herself most of all, and those comments — hundreds of them aimed at her worst moments and badly timed mistakes, magnified by millions. her fingers curl into his shirt as another horrid sob wracks through her entire body, her tears dissolving into the black fabric of his shirt. she feels him stiffen and her throat closes up, prepared for the worst; for him to agree, since he saw firsthand what they were talking about.

instead, he hugs her even tighter, her voice firm despite its soft timbre. “we chose you.” her headache bangs the drum line of a death metal song against her skull. “no matter what, we chose you. they only know what’s edited and served to them on a platter.”

she can feel him smiling without seeing it. “stage fright is normal even if you’ve been singing since you were little. you’re only human after all. and what’s a few bad clips compared to getting the chance to debut? you’ll work hard and do better. i know you will.”

cléo’s chest tightens a bit, but not painfully this time. she allows herself to relax into his hug for as long as she can bear it before she pulls away and awkwardly stares at her lap. “now i feel kind of silly. but, um. thank you for listening.”

“it’s the least i could do when you have clear intent to kill me. one last good deed before i die from heart burn or inflammation or something.”

chan smiles as cléo threatens to swap bowls, wiping a stray tear from the corner of her eye.

#[ miscellaneous. ] #— 하트 .. #and then cléo practiced and practiced and perfected her versatility to become one of the most respected vocalists in the industry 🫂 #fictional idol community #fictional idol oc #fictional idol addition #fictional kpop community #fictional kpop oc #fictional kpop idol #skz 9th member #skz added member #skz addition #skz female addition

[stoned-eren]

shy!armin headcanons

a/n: ok so this was supposed to be shy!armin but i guess i just made him awkward??? so hope you like shy awkward armin fluff t/w: maybe slight suggestive at one point?

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

meeting armin was, interesting, to say the least. you met him at a mutual friend's house party. he seemed out of place, a nice young man surrounded by a bunch of sweaty, boozed up people. he simply stood to the side, awkwardly speaking now and again while your mutual friend, eren, shotgunned a 16 oz tallboy. the night for you two ended once eren got too drunk and needed to be taken care of by armin.

you would definitely say he was polite, kind, and thoughtful. it just seemed as though he had little to say.

armin was admittingly, very shy. and when he saw you it just made it ten times worse. he was stammering and tripping over his sentences, running out of things to talk about. the mere sight of you made him beyond flustered. his mind was like a broken record, repeating the thought "oh my god they're so cute and they're talking to me what do i do what do i say oh my god"

he hoped he would see you again, just to make up for last time. he made sure that next time he saw you, he had things to talk about, even if they led no where. he even looked up some conversation starters online.

ever since your first meetup he's been crushing hard!!! at first it was really bad, he could barely let a sentence out. but as time goes on armin realizes you mesh with his temperament, and is more willing to talk to you about practically anything.

fidgets with his fingers. usually is standing like the "had to do it to em" guy. he just doesn't know what to do with his hands

mumbles!! trails off of his sentences bc he isn't sure if what he's saying is interesting

if he has something to say in a group setting, he usually waits until people are done talking to speak. most of the time this causes him to wait a little too long, and the group has already moved on with their conversation. because of this, he can be especially quiet with large amounts of people.

you think he's quiet with friends? just wait until you see him interacting with a stranger. that boy can't hold a conversation. usually says a grand total of three sentences to somebody before he can't come up with anything else to say. he'll quickly shuffle away before there's an awkward silence.

he also has a hard time making prolonged eye contact. (especially with you!!) doesn't know how long and when to make eye contact, so he usually is looking away from people when he speaks.

the more you're around armin the more he comes out of his shell, especially when it's just the two of you. he's even confided in you that he wishes he had more confidence so he could do the things he wants. (*hint hint* you)

touch starved!! usually pulls away instantly the second he feels someone's skin touching his. however, if you accidentally touch him, he reciprocates the affection instantly. if you brush your hand against his, he'll brush his hand back with a playful smile on his face. if you lean into him, he'll place his hands on your shoulders and pull you in closer.

wants to buy you gifts but isn't sure if that would be overstepping his boundaries. he has bought a few things here and there to give to you when if you two start dating. he keeps them wrapped up nice and neat in his closet, hidden from anyone just in case they were to ask.

armin talks to you the most out of everyone. despite this he's still rather quiet, choosing to spend his free time with you by writing or doing work. occasionally he'll ask you for tips. he loves the creative energy you two bounce off of each other.

definitely has looked up "how to get a person to like you" and "how to know if someone likes you" on google after meeting you

has written out a script for what to say when he confesses feelings for you. he's revised it three or four times at this point. (though, in reality, he's probably just going to accidentally admit he likes you)

#so sorry if its not accurate #｡ﾟ(｡ﾉωヽ｡)ﾟ｡ #armin x reader #armin arlert #arminxreader #armin x you #arminxyou #armin x y/n #arminxy/n #attack on titan #aot #snk #shingeki no kyojin #headcanons #headcanon #writing.exe #writings #writing #anime

[misscammiedawn]

Penlight Spoiler Reviews (Sayori Part 2)

Download Penlight (Pay what you like) from Itch.io here

Past reviews: Quick Review - Nozomi Routes - Sayori (Part 1)

Turq's reviews: Hiroko Robot - Hiroko Tickling - Nozomi Zombie

-

So... last time we met with Sayori and turned her into a Doll.

This time we're going to discuss the impact of Personality Play on a person and outright give Sayori dissociative identity disorder. As a person diagnosed with DID and a victim of personality play abuse I have a lot to talk about on this topic. I hope you don't mind me being a little over-indulgent.

CW: The Alter route will discuss topics of IRL hypnotic abuse and the long-term effects of personality play on a person's psyche as well as perspectives of how DID presents in my personal experience. I put the reality segments in italics to help people skip over them.

ALTER ROUTE:

Note that the name I refer to the Alter by in this review is the name I gave her. It is not even remotely canon. Aiko, Megumi and Yuri are the default names given by the game. Please do not take the naming convention I used to reflect DeMille's authorial intent. I use it mostly to match the screenshots and give some more pump to a narrative twist.

The first half of the review contains some seeds of discussion topics that I want to grow out so I highly recommend reading that one.

This route is my biggest hypnotic trauma being played out in visual novel format. I'll sprinkle my thoughts on the reality within the fiction. I'll put the reality pieces in italics if you want to skip them.

So if the Doll Route is based on the concept of boundaries and respecting someone's comfort then the Alter route answers the age old question of "What if your hypnotist were hit by a bus" that is to say, what are the impacts of going about your life with dangerous and permanent programming still in your head?

I suppose another theme would be one I vibe with intently. "Be careful who you entrust your mind with"

Sayori asked "what's the worst that could happen?" at the start of his hypnosis scene. Sayori, always so careful to think about things before committing takes her time with the doll suggestion. What if she didn't advocate for herself and set up firm barriers?

"What's the worst that could happen?"

Alter Route is a winding map of many paths and much of it is still yet to be written. The route begins with Sayori being asked to adopt a carefree persona who hates to study (and has a crush on Kyou). He also specifies that this persona will have no idea that Sayori even exists.

You, the player, are given a prompt to provide her a name.

I called her Sapphire. First playthrough and so shall again for this review. I picked that name with intent. I'm still not 100% sure it was a good idea, but I did.

Is it because of the alliteration? The blue hair? My referring to my hypnotic eyes as having a "sapphire flame"?

I said that this route was my biggest hypnotic trauma being played out on the screen?

In 2003 a dumb 19 year old met a man online named AW. AW saw that teenager's mind was fertile ground for character play. He planted a couple of alters in that kids head but none were as beloved nor as important as his little recruitment doll. His "slave" (oh how I have grown to hate that word) who he trained to bring him pretty girls...

The name I feel comfortable with in this current era of my life is Dawn. I prefer people call me Dawn when I am in this headspace, though I don't mind being called Camden and can tolerate being called Cammie when it is said by someone affectionate of us as an individual. But I am fractured. Diagnosed with DID in 2023. I type about it every now and again.

He called me Sapphire.

It was the name of a roleplay character... I even have Sue-Chan art commissioned of her. I have another piece at my bedside desk and have had it much of my adult life.

I have done a lot of thinking on if my DID is a result of this extensive play or if my DID simply made my mind more susceptible to it. The question is moot for the most part but I have found comfort in believing that there were elements of our heart which we were unaware of at a young age...

And AW reached in and found those elements within us. He found the part of us that was unburdened by sexual or gender repression and was able to personify our hypnosis obsession in a way we simply could not otherwise. He saw it. He identified it. Named it... Then dared to claim ownership of it.

In the game, Sayori takes to the suggestion swimmingly. She embodies the traits of this alter personality. She becames [Sapphire]. Giggling and acting shy around her beloved Kyou, she demands a tour of the house and Kyou becomes increasingly concerned that this act is going a little too far and you are given your first option.

For simplicity's sake I'll divide the path into 3 distinct branches (I made up the names for clarity as they do not have names on the official route tree):

Golden Ending - In which Sayori is woken up in Kyou's room and is so freaked out by the lack of memories between going into trance and waking up that much like Doll Route she refuses to let Kyou hypnotize her until she feels confident of the safety. In this route [Sapphire] does not come out ever again.

Day Lost - In which Kyou does not wake Sayori up and lets [Sapphire] go home and spend a night at home and isn't woken up until the next day at school. In this route Sayori's trust is broken enough that she seeks Nozomi's help, not Kyou's in saving her from this situation.

Week Lost - In which Kyou does not wake Sayori up and instead he decides outright to program [Sapphire] to be the dominant persona and avoid detection from the outside world.

For the Golden Ending there are a number of prompts during Sapphire's (let's drop the bracket gimmick and just call her that, it's better than saying Alter Sayori over and over) brief stint where you are given the option of bringing Sayori back and after she is justifiably upset about waking up mid-conversation in a different room you are given an option to summon Sapphire again.

I like that the chaotic nature of the initial encounter allows a number of options to go between what essentially are the options of "let Sayori exit Kyou's room" or "let Sapphire exit Kyou's room", especially as Kyou himself is making a decent number of assumptions about Sayori and her willingness to go along with the suggestion.

Kyou is a very big believer in the idea that a person's willingness to obey a suggestion is equivalent to a person's consent to the suggestion. This is because Kyou is a dumb kid and he is playing with fire.

If he does not try to force Sayori to calm down by imposing the carefree persona upon her she will accuse Kyou of projecting his infatuation of Nozomi onto her and become frustrated that he would dare override her core traits with such dangerous programming.

She notes that hypnosis shouldn't make her act the way she clearly was acting and admits this requires further study after cram school. She insists Kyou dedicate himself to further study on the topic too.

His study, which to his credit he does commit to, comes up empty. He believes Sayori is in denial that part of her yearns to be carefree and act as Sapphire had.

Sayori does her own research and...

Sayori is best girl.

She admits herself foolish for going along with it but is committed to the science of understanding what is happening to her. As a test she tries to resist Kyou's sleep suggestion but when she put her head on the pillow she was compelled to sleep deeply. She could not stop it. No matter how hard she tried.

She recognizes that the best hypnotists in the world could not do as Kyou has done.

Kyou gets defensive and starts a fight which escalates. At present you only have the option to apologize but there is a greyed out option for future in which you can bring Sapphire back.

I'm interested in seeing that path in the future.

After the pair talk it through Sayori thinks to involve Nozomi as a third party consultant. She wants to see if Kyou's hypnosis is as powerful on anyone or if it is just her and she knows Nozomi will instantly agree to this.

Sayori is a bad friend. In Doll route she refused to allow Nozomi to interfere with the hypnosis but in this route she weaponizes her knowledge of Nozomi's hypnosis fetish in order to have someone to test on. Even the safest penlight hypnosis has the potential for danger and it's hard to reconcile her involving Nozomi, even in a route where Kyou has proven himself not a shithead.

After school they test the penlight on Nozomi.

and it confirms in Sayori's mind the hypothesis that the penlight is odd and makes hypnosis act in ways it shouldn't. She even notes that the CIA have been trying to do what Kyou has managed for decades and a random high school kid accidentally stumbles on it.

Sayori really hates how Kyou just bumbles into success when she has to fight so hard to scrape by.

Now in the Nozomi route I mentioned that the timelines are pretty rigid for Sayori and to a lesser extent Hiroko. Sayori has cram school every day except for Sunday (which is a day taken by Hiroko's tennis tournament) and much of the Doll route requires maneuvering around study club, an optional obligation, and cram school which is necessary or she will be contacted by her father.

The other Alter routes will involve consequences for Sayori's grip on her responsibilities relaxing a little. Here she is still trying to be everything she should be while dealing with this extra stress.

That all said, she rushes out of the scene when Kyou finished the simple down and up with Nozomi. She has to go to cram school. She vanishes so fast that Nozomi is left sitting at the table running her fingers along the table and processing the fact that a fantasy from her mind control stories just came true and it's all suddenly over.

So Nozomi, with an opportunity to make her fantasies come true, tries to convince Kyou that it would help Sayori out to do more tests. She insists that it is in Kyou's best interest and she promises that if Sayori is upset then she will take full responsibility. She gives Kyou as many outs as possible to tempt him.

You have to deny her twice.

If you accept then there's a rough draft of an unfinished path but it also provides the most Sleepyhead moment in the game.

I swear to heaven Sleepyhead is going to cosplay Nozomi Akemi at a hypnosis convention one of these days...

Turning her down is one of the most mature moments Kyou has in any route.

His crush has just begged him to do the thing this entire affair was for and he turns her down.

I'm proud of you Kyou. You're a good boy. Also Nozo truly cannot be trusted around hypnosis.

You're a lovely girl, Nozomi, but you're insatisable. We all love you for it. But you cannot be trusted.

Look back to the Doll Route and the thing with the culture festival application. Sayori ruins her relationship with Nozomi because he couldn't trust her around the promise of hypnosis or Kyou with the temptation of working with Nozomi.

It's interesting when we get to see these dramatic irony stings.

The next day Sayori turns up and tells him to destroy the penlight. If you refuse then Kyou will force Sapphire out again use her willingness to go along with Kyou to entrance her again and both deprogram Sayori and erase Sayori's memory and then the next day utilizes Nozomi's offer to test more to do the same with her. Alone again but he still have his penlight.

In the good ending. He uses the penlight to deprogram Sayori and destroys the penlight. The story cuts a few months later and Kyou has become a regular at Study Club and is picking himself up. He is treating Sayori's insomnia via therapeutic hypnosis and is truly thinking about becoming a real life hypnotherapist.

He also pulled off the culture festival and though Sayori was not involved, Nozomi kept him on his toes.

The pair have grown close and know a lot about one another's lives to the point of which Kyou asks Sayori on a date to an arcade and she is surprised that he would ask her to such a location and Kyou mentions her talking about how much she enjoyed arcades before high school.

Sayori notes that they may be having a date but she still is still moving if she gets into med school and they won't last long. Kyou acknowledges that it's worth enjoying the moment even if it doesn't pan out.

I love her.

Now this route involves erasing Sapphire in both good and bad ending. She barely got to exist. Less than 5 minutes into the world.

Shall we go back in time to that initial encounter and meet her now?

An interesting part of the Alter routes where Sayori and Sapphire are bouncing back and forth (intentionally or unintentionally) is that this is the only route that has "rules" to keep a track of.

Any time Sayori is turned into Sapphire or Sapphire is turned into Sayori there is a complete void between times that the Become... trigger was used.

Sapphire recognizes that she was given a trigger to have a "carefree and fun" persona installed and assumes that "Sayori" is the name of this. Any time someone calls her it she becomes more and more aware of the situation.

Another rule is that Sayori and Sapphire have a common history and this is a really interesting thing that instantly caught my attention and proved that DeMille understood the assignment and either studied dissociative identities or is quite capable of understanding how they are expressed.

There is nothing about Sapphire that isn't part of Sayori. She is not how Sayori would imagine someone without inhibitions or a caricature of a carefree person. Sayori simply remembered a younger point of her life when she used to visit the arcade with her father and how her life felt before she became weighed down by expectations and the stress of not being able to keep up with her studies.

Look up at those last two pictures. That's Sayori at the end of the Golden Ending and Sapphire at the start of the Alter path. That smile isn't unique to Sapphire. Sayori can smile like that too. She can visit the arcade and have fun. That is a huge part of the story that is being told here. There truly is nothing within Sapphire that doesn't already exist within Sayori. They share a beautiful blushing smile.

It's not fully developed as a story where this was the core of the tale would be but I think that is something that makes it all the more effective. It's succinct. A concept I am completely blind to but I do like it when others pull it off. I am not saying that Sapphire is 12 year old Sayori (well. My thoughts are more nuanced than that at least. We'll see what I mean a little later). I am saying Sayori was asked to conceptualize a carefree version of herself and Sapphire was constructed from the emotions that she was once familiar with.

Which makes for not just an effective story, but a reflection of reality.

AW met us from a roleplaying group. Sapphire was not the only character we played in those days. But she was the only hypnotist character. When we were a teenager we were deep into reading hypnotic theory. We burned through so many books between ages 16-25. But there's a difference between reading how to do a thing and doing it.

But Sapphire was a character and so in posts she would think about different types of inductions by their name and talk about things like convincers and depth signals. She spoke in a grandiose pattern. She was confident. In charge. Dominant.

I don't know how many people AW had us hypnotize but he recognized that we did not have the confidence to do so when we were lucid. But in Sapphire's headspace there was no filter, no cogs turning... it was fluid. A person who knew their stuff, believing they knew their stuff... no delay, no bravado. Was I what I imagined a hypnotist to be or was I just a version of myself unburdened by a shame of kink, a fear of eroticism, any notion that this was not who we were and what we were built for.

I recall in the 2010s when my friend group met "me" in my iteration at the time... there was no hypnosis that time. Just a call from the heart to fill a void in a tabletop scene. Our playable character was transformed into the personality of a femme fatale and we needed to act as her with no time to prepare. We closed our eyes and reached inward. Sapphire is not the shape we sought but it was the shape that reached up and took control in that moment.

We think about that moment a lot. I took the name "Honoria" that day. The shape of "me" had changed. I wonder what shape I was before AW got a hold of me. Sapphire existed before AW... but he poisoned her. Changed her into something else. It makes me wonder what experiences, emotions and memories forged me. I wasn't always here. But now I am...

And I don't just disappear in silent moments or the years between activty.

I'm also a sucker for rules in storytelling and so when things like which name is spoken out loud or the trigger is used I am keeping these things in mind. I wanted to mention that early as it plays in as we go.

So Kyou does not bring back Sayori and Sapphire laughs about how Kyou's hypnosis must have failed when he calls her "Sayori" and she does not recognize the name.

And with Kyou's negligence on full display, Sapphire heads out of the house, not even recognizing her own name. He assumes she'll just snap out of it when the situation calls for it. He doesn't realize the level of distress that can be caused by leaving someone in a literally "altered" state interact with the world and their life.

We used to call it "channeling". Evidence had shown that hypnosis could let our younger self do things that they couldn't do in an unaltered state. Eventually they started to lean into it. At work. In intimate situations. When they needed to perform. When they needed to play a character, to push through barriers of fear and doubt. Close your eyes. Let yourself enter a flow state. Become the person you need to be...

We were already a transgender woman pretending to be a man. This just made us a transgender woman pretending to be a man needing to pretend to be other people just to function in basic life tasks. It felt pathetic. It felt so alienating from my sense of self. I didn't identify with my body or my mind. In seeking ego death we hypnotically abused ourselves to the point of which we were just an idea of a person who had a legal name that didn't feel like our own...

I did this to myself, I would think.

The next day Sapphire ambushes Kyou at the gate. He notes it's odd but he's just happy there's someone happy to see him.

Kyou doesn't realize this is the alter personality and calls her Sayori, convincing her that Kyou is still trying to make the hypnotic compulsion from the previous day work.

Kyou's reply is not to tell her to Become Sayori again. It is to panic about what Sapphire will do when she hears the wrong name being spoken by the teacher and her friends...

In his defense, Sapphire did scold him in trying to trigger her in a public place.

But he still prioritizes a comfortable landing for Sayori over the danger of allowing Sapphire to run rampant.

This priority is the source of much of the drama in the One Day situation.

During class people do infact call Sapphire "Sayori" and she is horrified and confused by it.

We are given two options.

"It's a prank" - Change her back

We'll focus on change her back for now and come back later for "It's a prank". After all. Kyou may be able to tell himself that he is prioritizing Sayori's safety and doesn't want to wake her up to a public setting but the longer he puts this off the more distress both Sayori and Sapphire will be in.

It would be irresponsible to actively encourage this situation to continue by gaslighting or worse programming a woman in distress to lean into her altered headspace to avoid confronting the reality of the other persona being upset when they wake up.

...so let's have Kyou bring Sayori back.

Penlight hypnosis causes the hypnotee to blank out entirely. We saw this directly in the "Reversal" route. This counts for altered states too. We had seen it when Sayori woke up suddenly in Kyou's room and we saw her reaction to it in the Golden Ending path.

Imagine how terrified she would be waking up a day later with no memories of her night. Knowing that some other version of herself had lived a day in her life. Spoken to her parents. Attended school. Acted as if it were here.

The sentiment makes her sick to her stomach.

Sometimes in our emails and chatlogs we find little bits of evidence of our actions and behaviors, areas of the internet we had posted in with no recollection, even after system discovery.

AW had Sapphire make her own Yahoo account to send messages from, I have the sign-up email in my inbox. When I saw it my blood froze cold. I still do not know the password and it has been locked from my attempts to get in. It terrifies me to think of all the things I would see if I managed to get in.

I don't think I can describe the powerlessness and vulnerability that comes when you realize that the continuity of your own experience has been disrupted and even in the face of evidence you're unable to reconcile it. You know that it was you. You cannot deny that. But it still remains alien. You have no memory at all of the situation or scenario. It makes you feel so hopeless and untethered.

She takes it fairly well, given the circumstances.

Sayori retreats to the rooftop club ordering Kyou to stay the hell away from her. She is beyond terrified.

Kyou, being Kyou, instantly starts internally pouting about how he is not at fault for how people take his hypnotic suggestions and that it is unreasonable to blame him when hypnosis cannot force someone to do something they didn't want to do.

Typical Kyou stuff.

He does note he should have been better about safety and beats himself up a little about his mistake, though.

From here the school week continues on with Sayori avoiding Kyou. She instantly speaks to Nozomi, someone she knows can help her with matters of hypnosis. Nozomi even gives Kyou a firm talking to and tells him in no uncertain terms "you hurt my friend. You have to atone. On her terms, not yours."

Nozomi is wonderful. She really gets to shine in this route as she is the voice of ethics in hypnokink. Ironic, given how quickly she throws that all away when she has an opportunity to go under for herself but she knows her stuff, she knows her ethics.

It speaks to how much a person can let their own safety disappear when they are given opportunities to play. I'm certain all the older members of the hypnosis community had some brushes with dangerous individuals due to their own level of self-neglect.

But Nozomi does know what ethics are and she wants to protect her friend. She does a fantastic job of it.

She acts as a mediator and invites Kyou to her house the following day so that Sayori has a safe space to work out what the heck is going to happen next.

At Nozomi's house they gather together and Nozomi lets Kyou have it, she all but screams at him.

(Nozomi and I share a soapbox)

The rant Nozomi gives on ethics at this point is one of the highlights of the game for me and not just because of my connection to the reason she's yelling. She speaks passionately about how ethical hypnosis is performed, she uses the word "hypnotee" several times (proof that DeMille is read up as the fictional space and public consciousness tend to favor "subject") and notes how Satoshi, the senior from last year's show, had performed correctly.

Nozomi's anger at Kyou is something that reminds me of a number of my close friends in the best possible ways.

Sayori even notes that she is certain Kyou meant no harm and that she forgives him. Nozomi's reply is "Not until he gets on his hands and knees"

Better be careful, Sayori. Nozo is coming for your "best girl" crown.

Sayori is Sayori though and she is not going to submit herself to deprogramming hypnosis without understanding the situation in full and having control over how the matter is handled. This may not be the consent/rapport version of Sayori's story but she is still the same woman. Well, Sayori is anyway.

Sayori notes that the level of control that Kyou has demonstrated matches years of conditioning with a hypnotist and shouldn't be replicated with 2 sessions worth of trance.

AW and I met in 2003. I broke it off with him in 2010...

Sayori wants to understand the rules and pontificates that if they are as she thinks then if Sapphire came out she would not recall anything between the last time the trigger was used and the present moment. Sayori is also certain if she heard the trigger phrase she would be incapable of resisting it.

To prove this she asks Kyou to use it.

And it works. Sapphire returns, giggling at the magic trick of Kyou teleporting her from school to Nozomi's house. She's just delighted to be out of class. She is hypnotically compelled to hate studying after all...

Sapphire takes it all in stride and seems to have no qualms with Nozomi's presence, outright saying that she assumes Nozomi invited them over because of her "hypnosis-loving giddiness". Sapphire knocks Nozomi off her balance by outright identifying her fetish and laughing at how Kyou clearly picked up on it too.

All Kyou needed to do was say "Become Sayori" again and the scene would be over, hypothesis confirmed. Alas, what can go wrong must go wrong and Nozomi's mother enters the scene and Kyou prioritizes the comfort of Sayori waking up in an awkward position over her safety.

He convinces Nozomi to let the conversation play out and just trigger Sayori when the mother has gone. Right? Sorted.

A small chat turns into lunch.

Lunch stretches on and Sapphire starts talking it up. We learn a little more about Nozomi's board game hobby and the fact she has a secondary friend group she plays games with on some evenings.

Sayori's phone goes and Sapphire excuses herself to answer it... and then goes missing.

The next sequence is a lovely wild goose chase of Nozomi and Kyou unable to find Sapphire (her phone is turned off!) and worrying that Sayori's father referred to her as "Sayori" and Sapphire worked out she's the installed personality and ran off to prevent anything happening to her.

Remember how I said the timelines of the game are rigid. Saturday is a good day for this to happen. Sunday is Hiroko's tournament after all...

...and Saturday is cram school for Sayori...

Her dad was upset she wasn't there and Sapphire, hypnotically induced to hate studying, hung up on him and turned off her phone and ran off to have fun.

The goose chase has some wonderful characterization of Kyou and Nozomi bickering, a brief Hiroko cameo and some character history for Sayori.

They find Sapphire at the arcade. In every route, as noted by the ending of the Golden Ending, Sayori has fond memories of going to the arcade with her father prior to high school and she was actually remarkably good at video games and found them relaxing fun.

Sapphire is just built from that feeling after all.

I do not know how much research DeMille did in this route. Turq told me in reading blog entries (this specific route was written this year) that DeMille was not happy with how this route was written and I was surprised to hear that. As a person with DID and former victim of personality play abuse I felt the nuances were handled remarkably well.

One of the theories of DID (which is a dramatically contested topic in psychology. I should do a post on the 3 major theories that are kicked about someday) is based on Attachment Theory. In child's psychology they are developing aspects of identity, self and personality which are typically reinforced by their relationship to caregivers and the stability of their environment.

Attachment Theory posits that while the child is developing they come to have subconscious expectations of their environment based on how they are treated that cause a level of anxiety and avoidance with Secure Attachment being low anxiety/avoidance and Disorganized Attachment being high levels of anxiety/avoidance. Disorganized Attachment is more than just anxiety/avoidance, though. It comes from unstable environments where the child cannot reliably act in a certain way to get their needs met. Caregivers and authority figures do not respond well either via abuse or neglect (for instance an alcoholic mother may be violently and angry towards a child at night and then loving and apologetic in the morning) leaving the child feeling confused and afraid and unable to rely on stable protection and affection. Thus the personality and stable sense of self does not develop as the child is not modeled a correct way to behave, leaving them without a stable core.

Add in some cPTSD to the mix and you get some fun stuff happening in the brain.

Incidentally Disorganized Attachment is something that comes up in the development of BPD (which includes Identity Confusion as a diagnostic criteria) as well, which is why some psychologists believe that DID is just BPD with extra steps. As I said it's a contested field.

That all is to say that Sayori's relationship with her parents is strained. They are always working, something she and Kyou bond over, and she herself is busy to the point of breaking trying to live up to their expectations. Maybe I'm just headcanoning it but Sayori and her father clash a lot when Sapphire goes against his wishes.

So it is truly remarkable to me that Sapphire regressed to the point in her life when she used to visit the arcade and play games with her father. Sayori always refers to him as "father" and (in this route) Sapphire always refers to him as "daddy". I chose to put weight on that, even if it's not intended by the author.

Every one of her routes this love of video games exists but you'd never see it if she didn't have a reason to let it shine. It's not that she's ashamed of it. She just cannot be the person she was before and it's part of the reason she resents Kyou. Kyou can just take it easy and coast without even trying. She's sacrificing SO MUCH and cannot even feel confident about her ability to succeed.

Sapphire just takes the weight of that responsibility off of her.

Oh it's been a while since I used a photo. I got caught up talking about psychology stuff. I do that sometimes. Here. Have a Sayori kicking Kyou's butt at Street Fighter!

Sayori decides that this proves her theories about the penlight hypnosis without a shadow of a doubt and requests Kyou allow her to hypnotize him with it.

She does so at Nozomi's home and much like the Nozo-Reversal route we have a quick blank out from the induction to 20 minutes later. Nozomi and Sayori worked hard to be safe about their suggestion and we witness one of the most interesting scenes in the game from an ethics standpoint.

Kyou remains in trance and during this 20 minute window is forced to deprogram Sayori and remove Sapphire and sleep triggers from Sayori's mind.

We'll get more into the ethics of just erasing Sapphire in the final segment of this route...

Kyou argues that the penlight isn't a mind control device and Nozomi, clearly done with Kyou's denial and is about to get into an argument when Sayori steps in and notes how Kyou believes that the penlight is just a hypnosis tool and not a mind control device and if such were true then he would not obey any programming that he did not want to.

She orders him to break the penlight.

Kyou obeys.

But he fights the compulsion.

He fights it with all his might.

Seeing just how much he struggled in this scene reminds me of the ending of Nozo-Trance where Kyou commanded her to be his girlfriend. The penlight can overrule agency and in this moment Kyou cannot resist. He screams, begs the girls to stop, swears at them and cries out at the top of his lungs.

But he obeys.

Kyou is livid. Yelling at both girls that they had no right to subvert his will and destroy his hard work. He even threatens to build another one... and it is in this moment when...

Sayori hugs him and shares a moment of perspective. They had both been violated by the penlight and left to feel confused and afraid at the complete lack of control they each had in their own mind.

The ending to this route is actually rather positive. Sayori's father relents enough to let Sayori ease from her studies a little as it is clear that she had a burnout that erupted in her behavior during Sapphire's reign and that she was working better with full rest anyway.

Any Sayori route tends to include a note that moderation helps her more than obsessive study. Burnout will actually kill her but she needs to make the change from inside. She's a proud woman with a firm sense of control on her experience. She does not want to be told what to do, but she benefits a lack of pressure.

Kyou, Sayori, Hiroko and Nozomi start a D&D campaign together and Sayori finds an affinity for acting out characters in the setting.

Trust me, I can relate.

So this is what happens if Kyou wakes Sayori up on the school day after creating Sapphire.

...what happens if he didn't?

What happens if Kyou is arrogant enough to think Sayori is better as a carefree lady who hates to study?

What if Kyou decided he wanted to keep Sapphire?

"It's a prank" Route:

Every now and again I pull up my chatlogs with AW and one question plays in my head over and over again.

"How could I trust someone like this with my mind"

I pulled up chatlog and did a word search for "memory" to see if he ever did amnesia shenanigans with me. I found this exert:

AW: so she's pretty much wholly brainwashed at this point AW: her memory, personality, beliefs etc… are all customizable AW: she's got a second, deeper moral compass now. 'right' is what pleases master, and 'wrong' is what displeases master

As I read this all I could think was how did I let someone talk to me like that. How did any part of me accept that he could be allowed to mold us... it was such a violation.

If there is one thing I am grateful for it is that hypnosis in reality is not hypnosis in Penlight. The things AW commanded us to do were unconscionable. But we simply did not obey. But we did not run from him. It took him trying to make moves on people in our vanilla real life to make us break it.

If Kyou decides to trick Sapphire into thinking everyone is calling her Sayori as a prank, she instantly starts to threaten Sayori's entire career by complaining about study club and how much she hates school. Kyou doubles down.

Kyou doubles down in the worst way possible.

He hypnotizes Sapphire to always hear the name "Sayori" as Sapphire and to always unconsciously refer to herself in speech and writing as Sayori. By the absolute grace of DeMille Kyou remembers enough to make this suggestion in a way that saying "Become Sayori" will not be heard as "Become Sapphire". Though in my opinion the fact he even thought to close that loophole speaks to how unethical he is being right now. He knows what he is doing and is doing it anyway.

When Kyou is a little fuck he really makes me hate him...

During this hypnosis session Kyou starts thinking of Sayori as "Sapphire's other personality" before internally correcting himself to say "real personality".

That's one of the biggest themes of this route. "Real".

In the first two routes, Sapphire was a suggestion gone awry. Her autonomy (as well as a good use of "compartmentalized memories" in dialogue) is noted in the "Bring Sayori Back" (Day Lost) route but it is in this route that Sapphire and Sayori are treated as full dissociative identities.

Having just committed an atrocity on Sayori and helped smooth out any wrinkles in the personality he installed in Sayori's mind (that is commanded to have a crush on him), Kyou wakes her and she confesses her love. Kyou reciprocates.

Kyou's denial is legendary enough that if DeMille revealed he had a hypnotic compulsion to have the worst possible take in any scenario where the player isn't controlling the situation, I'd believe her.

Sapphire is all about the public displays of affection and starts being intimate and close to Kyou at school, pulling him to the rooftop club. There she mentions that she is dating Kyou and they are practicing hypnosis for the cultural festival.

Nozomi's hypnosis radar is pinged.

After Hiroko incredulously calls her bullshit, Sapphire doubles down and states that she is going to have a proper date with Kyou during the coming weekend. When reminded that mock exams are coming up and she should be studying, Sapphire happily says she will blow it off in order to spend time with her love <3

Nozomi's bullshit detector is pinged.

However, Nozomi is Nozomi. So she simply chimes in that as Class Rep it is her duty to help with the cultural festival and she must be involved in this hypnosis show. There is no options in this. They will attend Kyou's house tomorrow and there is no ifs or buts.

Sapphire also proves she cares about her friends and notes she is prioritizing Hiroko's tennis match for Sunday. Sayori is a good friend, even when her moral limitations and over-controlled behaviors are turned off.

Why, yes. I do know what I typed in the last review.

Have you considered Sayori is best girl, though?

Nozomi spends the day scripting out what will happen with the hypnosis session (no shenanigans, just scripting) and is enjoying herself but then Sapphire gets the phone call. Same time as it happened in the previous route. Sayori's father is livid that she is not at cram school. This time however we get to hear the argument and it is fairly pointed.

Sayori cannot avoid going in this route. It's interesting to note the differences between Sapphire without Kyou's reinforcing her presence in Sayori's mind and how she is here. The other Sapphire just hung up the phone. This one ended up going.

Nozomi excuses herself before noting "Sayori has never missed school. Not once. Not regular school of cram school."

She notes the discussion about second personalities and knows damned well what is going on here.

My beloved audience, behold! It is the thesis statement of this entire route. Also I will remind people of what Nozomi's first action is when she gets a hold of the penlight in Nozo-Reversal route.

There are so many times in this game where characters make overt ironic references to other routes. This is most certainly one of those moments.

After cram school Sapphire and Kyou meet up for their date and Sapphire talks about how she had intended on getting in a higher level high school but had not been able to be accepted elsewhere. She was happy to have Nozomi and Hiroko still in her life but it marks the moment that Sayori had become obsessed with study.

She visits the arcade and notes how she used to visit with her dad. Once again I note the fact that this Sapphire is less childish than the previous one. I feel the "Bring Sayori Back" Sayori was regressed to who she was before high school, referring to her father as "daddy" where here she calls him "dad" every time. Sayori always says "father".

Kyou's hypnosis has integrated Sapphire and Sayori and more importantly associated the memories, just not the behaviors. This Sapphire is an adult and she has full ownership over her actions during high school and has decided that she does not want to be that person anymore. She is happier like this.

Sapphire plays an arcade game and thanks Kyou for letting her "relive a happier time in her life" before dragging him down for dinner.

The two bond over their estrangement from their parents. Kyou is from a broken home with a father he barely sees and Sayori/Sapphire have a paramedic mother they barely see and a father who doesn't do anything to help anyone and Sayori/Sapphire disagrees with what he does and they argue about it.

She had wanted to become a doctor to make them proud even when they did not have economic advantage but Sapphire is not as sold on the idea. A doctor needs to keep up on study for their entire career. She has no interest in such a life.

Kyou starts to realize he is making a huge mistake and that programming Sayori to go against everything she stood for.

Finally realizing what Nozomi was trying to tell him before he realizes that he's done a horrible thing and tells her that they have to break up. He confesses everything. That he used hypnosis to change her personality, that he expected she would snap out of it, that he is going to throw her entire future down the drain and it's not right and they have to stop.

Then Sapphire pulls the rug out from under him.

We have just lost cabin pressure...

So you may have noticed that I was calling her by the alter's name this entire time.

The game text is still calling her Sayori and has been since we reprogrammed Sapphire to unconsciously hear the name Sayori as her own. Kyou has been calling her Sayori. The entire game up until now has been treating this character as if she is Sayori but with her personality adjusted.

This scene has the game switch the name card back to Sapphire.

She's known the whole time that she is the installed personality. She worked it out on the first day when people were calling her Sayori. The installed personality was supposed to be "carefree and fun-loving" and she sees those traits in herself. Therefore it stands to reason if she behaves in the way Kyou's hypnosis was supposed to make her act and people called her the wrong name then she is the one who Kyou created.

And she's okay with it.

Moreover she knows Kyou can just say "Become Sayori" and be done with it.

And she is NOT okay with that.

"What is this "real" business? I am as real as can be, Kyou. Do you mean to say I am not the original? That I am a creation that must be destroyed now that I have inconvenienced you?"

"Kyou, I am no parlour trick for you to put away once it has been used. I am real. I have lived a life."

"Do you... do you really think you have the right to take that away from me, Kyou?"

Sapphire explains she has existed as a feeling within Sayori for some time and that her experiences these past few days are her own and belong to no one but herself.

Flooding with tears she says that what Kyou calls "fixing" her is actually Killing her.

One thing I see argued back and forth in support groups is the concept of a core/original/real personality. Many therapists, especially those approaching from the perspective of the IFS model and expect there to be a "Genuine Self" waiting to emerge. I do not share this viewpoint and even if I did , how ethical would it be to assume the birth identity is the only valid one when we've been living as a woman for 3 years.

Even still... would "birth identity" and "the original" even be synonymous. I consider "birth identity" to be the boy from London, not the person in the stories we were told of our childhood.

I may not have full memory of my childhood but I am fully aware of the things the "little monster" did. I wasn't allowed to grow past it. Suspended from school 3 times, expelled once, hospitalized a kid by cracking his head on a concrete pillar, stole, broke into places, got brought home by the police a couple times. All before hitting 10 years old.

I do not know who that child my father would tell me stories about was. I don't identify with him. I do not feel him inside me. I am aware it was me who flooded the toilets, punched a teacher and broke into abandoned buildings.

I also remember the refrain in my head in those young years "don't be like them." I remember moments of oblivious bliss and moments of being consumed by an all powerful righteous fury in my heart. Simultaneously a happy child and an angry adult. Seeds that would grow into Cammie and Camden. Yet neither of those were my name... they wouldn't be for another 20 years.

When we transitioned. We didn't know we had DID. Camden had been running the system for a few years at that point and was finally able to express openly and outwardly... and so on days when we couldn't present femme our self-loathing and emotional volatility increased. We began to hate with a burning passion any expression of masculinity and our English heritage.

We began to hate our birth identity existing within us. We tried to erase him. End him.

It's actually a common practice for people going through gender transition. Here's a comic that makes the point more clearly than I ever could. See my tags for it? This comic convinced me exactly what the game is saying firmly. The Boy has a right to exist within our heart. We don't get to put him away just because he's not convenient to our gender expression anymore.

Kyou is told firmly that to erase Sapphire from Sayori would be murder and that Sapphire believes Kyou is a better man than that. She acknowledges this is a heavy topic and gives Kyou time to think. Our little idiot hypnotist is left completely out of his depth, forced to accept that he has given life to this alternate personality and such gifts cannot be revoked lightly.

What follows is a sequence at school where the rooftop gang gather and Hiroko stresses about her performance in the tennis tournament may impact her scholarship giving Sapphire the opportunity to show how carefree she is about scholarships. Nozomi confronts Sapphire with the knowledge that she is an installed persona and is horrified to find out that Sapphire not only knows this but does not care to be "fixed".

The conversation also bounces back and forth between using the names "Sayori" and "Sapphire" enough that Hiroko and Nozomi notice traces of Kyou's meddling. He confesses that he has programmed her to hear the name she is comfortable with whenever someone is clearly addressing her.

Nozomi is LIVID at hearing Kyou tried to mitigate harm by disguising it. She knows just how monstrous and unethical that is.

This is something that I fear isn't delved into enough within the ethical routes of the game. There are shadows of it here but I really feel like there needs to be a route that is specifically about owning mistakes.

As Turquoise pointed out in his NozoZombie review, a good hypnotist can still make no errors and still hurt a person. Kyou is entirely the type of person to utilize amnesia suggestions to bury mistakes and put things "right" but typically this only happens in the bad endings of routes.

I know too many people who played in the 2000s with dangerous hypnotists who crossed boundaries or made abreactions and tried to make the hypnotee forget rather than owning their mistake. I truly feel this is a topic that DeMille would knock out of the park if it were the sole focus for a storyline.

I also want to know that Sapphire's speech patterns at this point of the story are unique to her. Sayori has a grandiose way of speaking and the way that Sapphire talks is in character for Sayori but where Sayori's expanded vocabulary and wordy ways of speech is treated as her being a little loquacious, Sapphire embraces the concept of "eccentric", utilizing some phrases that she uses as a point of comfort such as "as you like".

Oh and as a British expat, I do love when I can feel DeMille's nationality bleed into this Japanese setting. It just makes me happy in the same way playing a 90s era RPG with American pop-culture references or seeing Brock eat a "jelly donut" would.

On the rooftop Nozomi caves in to despair, realizing that her friend is the one being killed. Sapphire insists that Sayori still exists within her mind but she has no reason to yield her existence to her. Nozomi's crying starts attracting attention and so Sapphire concedes that Sayori needs to be part of this conversation but it has to happen later in a safer place.

"Wait! Not here. And certainly not now [...] do you have any idea how Sayori will react were she to wake right now? In this place?"

Sapphire says that they need to perform the hypnosis in the privacy of the study club, where Kyou first hypnotized Sayori.

If you've not played this route yet, I want you to cast your mind back. Kyou did indeed hypnotize Sayori for the first time in the study club. This is a true statement.

But there's something odd about it, don't you think?

Kyou notices too but cannot quite identify what it is until Sapphire says that in order to make a safe landing spot for Sayori the conditions need to be perfectly replicated. Including Kyou and Sayori being alone in the room.

What is she scheming, I wonder?

After school Sapphire enacts her role as head of the study club and Kyou waits until afterwards to meet with her. Nozomi makes a final plea to bring Sayori back and tries to explain that Sapphire is not a real person and that the fact he can erase the hypnotic trigger is a proof of this fact. Kyou, who has spent time with Sapphire and recognizes her as a unique entity, disagrees.

Kyou's denial is legendary, though. Nozomi is making sense. She feels this "Sapphire" is simply Sayori following hypnotic programming, acting in the ways that Kyou told her to act and there is no separate individual. There is just programming that needs to be removed.

I like that this argument is left as a firm disagreement between Kyou and Nozomi. The ethics are dirty as can be in this situation. Kyou literally created a personality that is hypnotically compelled to love him. Earlier in the route Nozomi says that Sayori is "under duress" when Kyou says they are in love and that is right.

The situation has spun out of control and now the morality of it has become ungovernable. It is wrong for Kyou to permanently change Sayori into his girlfriend, it's the same situation as the endings where Kyou forces Nozomi to become his girlfriend. It is wrong to deprive Sayori of her autonomy, her life, her years of hard work.

Erasing Sapphire should be a cut and dry case.

But Sapphire is advocating for herself and does not consent to being erased. The whole situation boils down to whether or not you believe Sayori is following hypnotic conditioning or if Sayori and Sapphire are separate individuals with autonomy.

To add in further moral murkiness, Sapphire has come up with a scheme.

She will finish out her high school career pretending to be Sayori. Acting as a stuffy and studious woman, friend to Nozomi and Hiroko and stay away from her beloved Kyou. Earn their freedom by going through the motions and then after school is over she can return to Kyou and not have to worry about her parents or friends or society nagging about her behavior ever again.

Obviously that is an unacceptable circumstance.

Makes it easier to just ignore Sapphire's consent. She's not "real" after all...

But Sapphire is smart enough to know this may be the case and has selected the Study Club as the location of their hypnosis instead of Kyou's home.

That's the thing that was odd about the location. Kyou hypnotized Sayori in the study club for the sleep suggestion. Sapphire was created at Kyou's home.

She knows that if Kyou tries to bring Sayori back then he will be forced to manage the fact that she has lost 5 days of her life. Sapphire is so intent on living that she has put Kyou in a position where refusing her is disadvantageous. Sapphire is an evil mastermind when her back is to the wall.

In her mind to "include Sayori in this conversation" would be to destroy herself. Once she loses her ability to advocate for herself then Kyou would be the only one who could speak to Sapphire's autonomy and Sayori, Nozomi and Hiroko would never treat her as "real".

We know this. Nozomi said as much just before this meeting.

Sapphire admits, she has no right to demand this of Kyou (though she did think to put him in a position where refusing would end poorly) and that if he simply remembers her and keeps her in his memories then it could be enough.

You are then given the option to bring Sayori back or not.

Bring Sayori Back - Go Along with Sapphire's Plan

Should you go along with Sapphire's plan then she will have Kyou use a fake trigger to "bring back Sayori" and invite Nozomi to come into the room and begin acting out as if she were Sayori.

As soon as Nozomi comes in she keeps asking Sayori if she's okay. Telling Sayori that it's been 5 days. That Kyou hypnotized her.

Sapphire sells her role and is as livid and rigid as one would expect Sayori to be. Nozomi starts peppers every sentence with Sayori's name. Truly concerned about her friend.

Then Nozomi proves she is smarter than Kyou and knows her shit with hypnosis.

"Sayori" does not even react. She is hypnotically compelled to hear either name and internalize it as the name she should hear. Nozomi said Sayori every sentence in order to slip in a "Sapphire" and see how she reacts.

Sapphire fails to notice and Nozomi knows that the pair of them had lied to her...

In despair she once again cries for her friend to come back and Sapphire springs into action.

We get a timeskip to the final day of school. "Sayori" hangs out with her friends and Kyou remains a social parriah. Everything has gone "back to normal".

As they pile out of school Hiroko notes that Nozomi looks jumpy and just doesn't want to be there. Sapphire looks at Nozomi and assures her that she is amongst friends and she shouldn't be so tense. That if she had anything that was concerning her she could speak up and she would be happy to help her see things in a new light.

We flash back to the study club room.

Sapphire didn't use the penlight. She threatened to use the penlight.

She kept Nozomi in line via threats because she enjoyed watching the discomfort in her face whenever Nozomi was caught in the moral quandry of doing something or not fighting against this injustice. Sapphire gets off on having power over people and making them stew in discomfort.

Full credit to @spiralturquoise for pointing out that in the doll route there is a moment where Kyou has a thought box where he is convinced Sayori is enjoying his discomfort.

I am convinced that Sayori in every route enjoys watching people in moments of discomfort. It certainly explains her reactions to NozoZombie's stage show and why she makes the best audience member to be watching the events.

There are actually a number of little bits of foreshadowing in other routes. In one route Hiroko even jokes about how "we don't need two Sayori's around here". I look forward to replaying the game and catching the little asides.

DeMille has a very firm idea of who these characters are and is so gifted at maintaining their internal consistency. More impressive given how each character is dramatically altered when they interact with the penlight.

The bad ending concludes with Sapphire reuniting with Kyou andf starting their new life together with her performing a little bit of jabbing at him to see his own discomforted face contort as he struggles against the morality of his actions.

This ending has Kyou and Sapphire break off from the world and alienate themselves from family and friends to dive into a life consumed by one another. I find that this is one of the more intriguing fail conditions of the routes. Isolation is a big theme of all the bad endings. Whether Kyou ends up ostricized due to his misdeeds, sacrifices connections with the girls for what he feels is the safest option or is consumed by a hollow life where kink has consumed everything.

The doll bad ending is of a similar calibur where Sayori has no cares or interests outside of how wonderful hypnosis feels and so Kyou finds a full time job in maintaining a hypnojunkie and his life entirely becomes about catering to those needs.

Intimacy and connection is the good end. Isolation, even when alone together, is a bad end.

But that's a bad end. Let's bring Sayori back instead.

Kyou's lip trembles and he mumbles out his apologies. Sapphire just smiles back and closes her eyes in acceptance.

"You... You need to Become Sayori again."

Sayori wakes up and is stunned, scared and confused. Nozomi rushes in to hug her friend and they go to Kyou's home in order to sort things out. It was where the suggestion began and thus it seemed prudent to handle it there.

Nozomi and Kyou explain everything and Sayori listens and absorbs. She is numb by the end and tells them what it felt like for her. There are no memories at all of her time as Sapphire and she could not impact anything from within their mind, she was simply trapped in a void.

Kyou takes this as confirmation that Sapphire is a being unto herself.

Sayori agrees, noting that her hubris enabled this and that she should have been careful to entrust her mind to an idiot clod. She now has a dissociative identity to show for her arrogance. Sayori fully accepts that Sapphire is a separate entity born from her thoughts, emotions and memories and does have a right to exist.

Sayori is the best girl and I love her.

She gives Kyou two options. Erase all the programming and lock Sapphire away inside her mind forever, unable to come out and interact with the world. This option is as good as killing Sapphire but will allow Sayori full control over her life.

The other option is to integrate their consciousness to function together. Nozomi is horrified to consider this option, noting that it would be the end of Sayori's aspirations for med school.

She gives her signature Sayori smirk and boils it down to a simple statement.

"Ruin my life or destroy hers."

You bring Sayori under penlight hypnosis once again and are given the final option of the story.

Sapphire... I won't leave you behind - Sapphire... I have to let you go.

First off I note that Kyou frames this choice as being about Sapphire and not Sayori. I say that with no judgment or commentary. It's simply a fact of the route.

To erase Sapphire ends the game with an abrupt timeskip. The rooftop club want nothing to do with Kyou and he lives out the rest of his school career in solitude. Sayori manages to recover her lost week and feels confident about her chances for med school.

When Kyou speaks to her on her last day of school she is blunt and angry with him. She says every time she sees him she remembers how close she came to losing everything.

She says trusting him was her mistake and she takes ownership of it...

But Sapphire's life was placed in her hands and he sealed her away forever. Sayori wants Kyou to live with that. She wants him to miss her for the rest of his life.

She says goodbye and Kyou never sees them again.

I can think of few things in life more painful than being revoked access to speak to someone you love. To see them in front of you. To interact with them and to know that you are no longer on the "inside" of their trust. That you know the true names and shapes of the person... the people behind those eyes and know that you no longer have permission to see that. You are no longer allowed to hear their individual voice. It is a pain I would never wish on anyone.

And oh the level of self-loathing in internalizing that you have no right to be upset about it. That you are not owed access or trust. That you have to just live with the knowledge that they would take it all back if they could.

I know what it's like to miss someone for the rest of your life.

...so...

What if we integrate the pair into a single consciousness?

This time Kyou programs the two to have a line of internal communication and the ability to trade the body when they need to.

The timeskip happens again and Kyou has once again gone the final months of school alone. He is not soon to be forgiven for his actions. But as exams end the rooftop club have a date to go to karaoke to celebrate. Sayori is pessimistic about her propositions but did promise to celebrate. She also promised to talk to Kyou.

The rooftop club approach him and invite him to the celebration. As Sayori speaks with him, cold and upset, she is caught in moments of aside where she is caught in an internal argument.

The scene at the karaoke club is so beautiful and shows that not only has Sayori adapted to include her alter self into her life but Nozomi and Hiroko fully accept Sapphire as the 4th member of their group. Hiroko and Sapphire even seem to get along greatly.

Sapphire comes out to Kyou's comfort and delight and explains that Sayori pulled out of her emd school plans and they have to live a completely different life to accomodate their ideology clashes.

Kyou himself being one of them.

Sapphire and Sayori have internal conversations that Nozomi and Hiroko ask to be filled in on and for all it is worth this is handled just as it tends to be in my lived experience. DeMille did a good job of showing what "healthy multiplicity" looks like in a social dynamic and I cannot begin to thank her enough for that.

The whole "split personality" thing in fiction is always used as a source of drama. Internally as the turmoil between two (or more) individuals fighting over the solitary life. Externally as people not always knowing which alter they are speaking with.

I always appreciate when it's shown as just a part of who a person is. That people struggle to keep up with the shifts but are capable of following the changes and being aware that the person they are speaking to contains multitudes and the statement "they are the same person" and "they are different people" are both true at the same time.

In support groups I tend to see a common refrain that "DID is actually boring. It's just traumatized people trying to live their lives." and I agree with it. There's so much less mythology and intrigue in reality. This scene does a good job of showing the mundane reality of a person who has attained dynamic system communication and has people who they trust and share their truth with. The clumsiness and uncertainty of how any of it works and just trying to not stumble or apologize too much.

I often think I don't deserve the way people see me. See us. I've never been able to be what I am lucky enough to receive for others. In support groups and in life I have met other people who have these experiences and I fuck up. A lot. I try to not worry about it because I know I'd forgive the people around me if they messed up. But it takes earnest care and trust to be open with another person and for them to accept you and adapt their behavior to invite you in. It heals my heart to see Nozomi and Hiroko roll with it, even if they don't fully comprehend it.

During the karaoke party Kyou asks Sapphire where they stand, if they have a future or if tonight is a goodbye.

Sapphire takes him outside and admits that she still loves him and as Kyou reaches out to make a connection Sayori steps in and scolds her alter for breaking their agreement.

The pair get into an outloud argument over the situation and the impact Kyou's hypnosis has had on their shared life.

Sayori had to talk to her parents and tell them that her stress had caused a breakdown and she needs to adjust her life goals in order to accomodate her abilities. Sapphire jabs that Sayori would have had a miserable life treading water if intervention had not happened. Sayori notes that being forced to surrender her dreams is not a favor.

The sequence ends with Sapphire saying that she forced Sayori to give up her dreams. Giving up her love of Kyou is a suitable price.

Kyou will always be the one who ruined Sayori's life and saved Sapphire's. Sayori cannot bring herself to hate him but she cannot allow him to be in her life.

In a bittersweet ending, Kyou allows Sayori/Sapphire to return to the karaoke bar and he walks home.

The end.

The route is interesting in that there is real basis for it and yet the dynamics of the route lean more heavily into hyperbole than most need to. Adjusting a person's identity and risking them gaining a dissociative disorder is a very real issue within the hypnosis community.

I recently made a post about the topic which was inspired by my playing this route. I have no desire to out any of the people I have spoken to in the weeks since I posted it but a number of people have approached me to thank me for the post and share their experiences which mirror much of what AW did to me.

Then there's those Disney Deer files that are so imfamous at altering people's personalities and compartmentalizing their thought process that there are major online publications doing exposes on the topic.

DeMille handles the situation both in the present of noting what happens when a person's behavior is shifted by hypnotic conditioning and just how dangerous it is to give birth to alter egos via hypnosis. I feel there is full respect in her depictions and spare for Kyou's behavior being on a spectrum of irredeemable and fucking stupid; the characters treat the scenario with the gravity it deserves. I never felt like anyone betrayed their character's core while arguing on the agency and legitimacy of the alter personality.

I don't know if this is going to be the best storyline for anyone or be relatable to anyone outside of a very narrow window of individual... but as a member of that pinpoint Venn diagram... I appreciate that this story exists.

I think DeMille knocked it out of the park and I cannot wait to see what happens in the grayed out paths when they are written. Even if it hurts to read.

Next time we'll visit Hiroko. Though Turq has already handled the Tickling route if you want to read that now.

Going to take some time to focus on Not Penlight for now though. This took an age to write and edit.

#dawn posting #penlight #hypnosis #hypnokink #DID #watch me post my trauma in public #t4e #sayori is best girl #media myself and i #media essays

[boltupbitches]

Crème Brûlée and Sweets - Chapter 4

It had been over a week since her date with Joe, and aside from a text from him the next day, it's been mostly radio silence. Josie was put off by that. She thought they hit it off pretty well, but realized that her crush may have only been one-sided. Doubts started to swirl around like, 'Maybe he was just being nice? Maybe it was just to boost his online presence and be more relatable to fans? Wait - why would he do that when he clearly has a way bigger public profile than I have or will ever have?' Rinse and repeat.

For the most part, she kept herself busy with talking to her parents, facetiming Gaea, hanging with Mike, and cuddling with Biggs.

Gaea tried to talk her out of worrying about it, "Jo, he's just a guy that you barely know and hung out with once. I am not saying that to be a bitch, but I just don't want you to fall hard again. Let him come to you if he's interested!"

Josie buried her head into the sleeve of her hoodie and mumbled, "too late," at both statements. One, she was starting to fall for him - a hopeless romantic's greatest punishment - and two, she had messaged him a meme from the Office where Kevin spills his chilli everywhere. Nothing in return. That was yesterday. He didn't even read it.

Gaea groaned, "Joooooooooo - if I have to fly out to fucking Cincy and kick your ass, I fucking will! Who is this dude anyways to have you this hooked? He kicks balls for a living and probably isn't even that great!"

Josie lifted her head and glared back at her computer screen. "First of all, wrong sport. He's an American football player and is a quarterback. He's also a first round draft pick and Heisman recipient. Y'know, what Lexi is trying to do right now at 'Bama? His name is Joe Burrow."

Gaea stared blankly back. "That's supposed to mean something to me? I don't follow football and Lexi is a shithead with a few screws loose, so I normally don't listen beyond the bare minimum one call a week I have with him." She hummed quietly to herself while staring down at her phone. "Jo.. your hung up over this dude?? He looks like the kid from Home Alone if he grew up normal!" She starts to laugh a little to herself before scrolling through Google images.. "Wait a minute - is that? Nah, that can't be..."

Josie continued to glare at Gaea, not seeing the amusement in her reaction. "What?"

"He went to Ohio State? Soo... a guy I'm kind of seeing went to Ohio State."

"A guy? Is this guy a certain Joey Bosa who has liked all of your fucking instagram pics since the beginning of time? That guy? Wait - did you hook up before or after the mural job you got hired for at the Chargers training facility? What do you guys even have in common besides anime?"

Gaea scoffed and flipped her hair, "First of all, I got the job and then I fucked him weeks later. Let's get that straight right now, Ms. Jo! And we don't even talk football. He knows my lack of interest beyond the occasional update from my brother on his drafting prospects next season. We talk about art, gaming, travel, anime, and then we bone."

"Wait - so you ride my ass for being heartbroken over a dude ghosting me, but here you are hooking up with your own NFL player? What - how the fuck? I am confusion."

Gaea had an offended look on her face. "Listen, I never said don't hook up with him. Bone him if you want to. I highly encourage you do so and that you are careful. I'm just saying to be careful because I know you. There is nothing wrong with being a romantic. I think it's wonderful and I think you're going to find someone who recognizes that and will reciprocate that. I just don't want you to rush and be all in emotionally without being prepared. I love you, Jo, and I am sorry I was a bitch just now about it all."

Josie put a fake smile on her face, trying to not let her emotions slip up too much. "I know. I forgive you. We're just both a bunch of bitches to each other, but that's just us being us. I feel stupid that I'm even this impacted after a week of knowing the guy. I hate that I'm this way. It's why I don't date."

Gaea nodded, "I get it. Really I do. Listen, have you considered going back to therapy to talk about stuff? Sometimes there is an underlining experience that is the reason for things. I know my avoidance issues tend to come from the shit with my mom and my childhood. Not saying that's the reason for you, but talking to a mental health professional really gave me perspective I wasn't getting before. Wait - hold on a sec!" Gaea ducked out of view for a few moments.

Josie raised an eyebrow as she heard a deep voice greet Gaea as "babe" and then a few moments of mumbling before Gaea reappeared in the frame. "Hey, sorry, was letting my friend in."

"Your friend? That's what I am?" Suddenly a much taller and larger man ducked into the frame of the camera. "Hi Gaea's baking friend! I am Joey, her other friend who occasionally spends the night and buys her dinner. Nice to meet you."

Josie was starstruck for a moment, "holy fuck.." before clearing her throat. "Hi, Joey, I'm Josie, or Jo as Gaea usually calls me. Nice to meet you?" She said slightly uncertain. 'How do you great your best friend's boner buddy?'

"Ah! Now I know why you look familiar! I was just speaking with Burrow yesterday and he mentioned you." Joey smiled.

"Oh god.." Josie yanked her hoodie up over her face and dived face first into her couch, out of view from the camera.

"Is she ok?" Joey asked with concern.

"Yeah - she's just thinking about the Bunghole quarterback ghosted her."

Joey snickered at that, "Bunghole. Definitely changing Burrow's name in the chat to that. Anyway, nah, listen Josie? I'm going to yell at Burrow for not texting you back. Dude is a hopeless romantic with cold feet. He said he's pretty sure your out of his league and is scared you'll realize how big of a dork he is - which he definitely is. Much more of a dork than I am to be fair. I mean he watches Spongebob for fucks sake." Joey rambled.

"Morò, you watched Spongebob with me last night." Gaea interrupted.

"No, you had it on and I didn't want to bother you by changing the channel."

"But you actually changed it to that channel."

"Because I thought you wanted to watch it?" Joey sounded confused.

Josie sat back up slowly and pulled her hoodie back down. "Are we really discussing who watches Spongebob? Look, I really appreciate your help Gaea, and er- Joey, but I feel too embarrassed to ask anyone to do that - text him I mean."

"Oh, well.. too late? I texted him." Seeing Josie's face turn ghostly pale, Joey quickly interrupted. "Listen, he needs to hear this. If he doesn't address it now, you'll both continue dancing around each other for the rest of fucking eternity and the next time I see him for golfing, I don't want to listen to him cry to me, Nick, and Sam because he can't grow a set of balls."

Gaea nodded. "Yeah, it's bad enough I have to deal with Joey's brother Nick trying to slide in Nysa's DMs every other Saturday. I can't deal with anymore of you love sick fools."

"Wait - Nysa and Nick? They know each other?" Josie was confused once again.

Gaea nodded and rolled her eyes. "Kind of, but not really. He decided to use his Scooby Doo level investigative skills and discovered I had a sister when he found out about me and Joey. All he discovered was that she's pretty 'hot' - according to the text he sent Joey," She glared his way and he looked away as if he had no idea what she was talking about, "Long story short, he sent a follow request and has been trying to hoe it up in her DMs ever since. You know Nysa is the serious type, yeah? I told her straight up that he's a hoe and it's a no. Yeah, so that's that."

Josie started to laugh a bit at that. "You're ok with her calling your brother a hoe?" She asked Joey who was sitting there with his own grin at Gaea's blunt and harsh description of is little brother.

"I mean, if it was anyone else who said that shit, I'd be a bit mad. But it's Gaea and she's right. He's in his hoe phase right now. What's it they're saying on Twitter? City boys up? That's him."

Josie and Gaea started laughing at that image painted in their mind by Joey's description. He joined in at their reaction.

Once they all stopped laughing, Josie sighed, "Thanks for talking with me guys. I am going to get off here and get started on dinner. It was really nice meeting you, Joey. Gaea, we'll talk soon?"

Joey waved and got up from the couch, disappearing from view.

"Course. I'll probably call you tomorrow or something. Let me know how things go. I'm a flight away and I have a black belt in taekwondo. If shit goes down, I'm coming up there to Cincy to kick ass!"

Josie smiled and blew her a kiss, "Of course you would. Love you! Bye!"

Gaea blew her a kiss back, "love you too and ciao! talk soon!"

The facetime ended and Josie shut her Mac.

Within a few seconds a text popped up on her phone's screen.

Joe Brrr

Hey, sorry I've been MIA. Can I call you now? If you have time to talk.

Josie sighed before weighing out her options. Who was she kidding? She wanted to hear what he had to say.

Josie

Sure.

"Now or never, I guess." She mumbled to herself as his call popped up.

#joe burrow imagines #joe burrow imagine #joe burrow fanfiction #joe burrow fanfic

[spicybylerpolls]

ok i've got to come right in and say hi to that anon with a crush on finn. you are not weird!

first off, crushes are normal human behaviour. i want to say this outright and im not even being kind, it's just the facts. please dont let people online ever make you feel that they aren't. it's normal to crush. it's human.

i suppose the important part now is how you deal with this. well, you're talking to a community that can be very harsh and also very kind. what you need to do next is talk to yourself and try to stay aware of your own feelings so they don't become overwhelming.

if you know yourself to be someone who crushes hard/falls in love easily/engages in parasocial relationships, then be aware of what is likely or realistic for this crush. it's not like crushing on someone you know, because it's unlikely to go anywhere. if you understand this, great! enjoy the crush. let me point you towards mike wheeler himself with his poster of conan the barbarian. people throughout history have tacked posters of their crushes to their bedroom walls/had photos on their phone/pinterest boards/have made cave paintings on walls. this is NORMAL.

as for the age thing, which seems to be the big issue here, i would point you towards discourse on this blog before about the nebulousness of age/attraction. emotional maturity is not written on people's faces or the years they were born. finn does not look like a child, and you are in the same age bracket. how much younger did you feel two years ago? probs a lot in some ways, not so much in others.

at the end of the day, your crush is hurting no one, and i hope you don't go ahead and hurt yourself instead. be kind to yourself.

and to any folks out there who who might find themselves with awkward and uncomfortable crushes on finn (or noah for that matter, considering the nature of this blog) when they were younger, perhaps start by asking yourself why this is happening. look deeper before you write yourself off as a bad person. you might be fascinated by what you find, and get to know yourself, and the human condition, a little better.

be a jonathan! look, observe, and be kind.

have a great day anon, and enjoy.

Yeah I agree completely nonny! There's nothing wrong with having a crush, and as long as it doesn't progress into extreme parasocial behavior, it's perfectly natural and human. And it shouldn't cause guilt. FW seems to have that effect on a lot of people haha.

#byler #spicy byler #finn wolfhard #no poll

[boydepartment]

Pizza Parlor- Lee Felix: Chapter Five!

Description: Y/n is a stressed-out college student who has no idea what she is doing with her life. She is always wrapped up in nostalgia and her friends seem to know exactly what they're doing. Feeling insecure one night she decides to go on an old website. Club Penguin. Little does she know; she would encounter a certain penguin who was also having a rough night.

Stray Kids are idols, TXT is not.

Partial smau, mainly written.

Warnings for chapter 5: cursing!

WC- 2.1k

back next

masterlist

                                                                                          ��     ```

Song for Chapter 5: Crush - Tessa Violet

Chapter 5: What does my sweet look like?

“YYYYY/NNNNN!!!!!” You woke up to the sound of Kai practically shoving plastic in your face. You sat up and rubbed your eyes, totally forgetting the reason why he was here. Looking at him and laying back down you kept your eyes on him.

“Did the eggs knock you out that badly?” Kai asked, you sat up again and smacked him with a pillow. You now remembered the horrible events of last nig- this morning.

“HEY! I BOUGHT ALL THE DYE AND BLEACH AND STUFF!” He ducked, your eyes lit up and you quickly hopped-up yawning.

Kai followed behind you to the kitchen and set the stuff down.

“Breakfast well lunch I guess?” You asked facing the fridge, when he cleared his throat, you turned around and saw on the counter he brought takeout.

“KAAAI! You didn’t have to do that; I was supposed to pay for the dye too.” You ran over to the bag, he had gotten hashbrowns and a breakfast sandwich. He also already had two water bottles out for you both.

Kai let out a small, ‘pshhh’ then started talking, “who said you were paying for the dye, plus after what happened with the whole egg thing, I figured you are deserving of takeout.” You grinned at him and grabbed some paper plates so you two could eat on the couch and put on some cartoons or something. This was a Sunday morning ritual for your guys’ little household.

                “So, I wanted to ask, who is Felix?” Kai asked suddenly.

                You choked on your water and looked at him, “what do you mean?”

                “Well, Yeonjun said you were talking to some guy named Felix… Soooooooo Y/n whoooo is heeeeee?” Kai taunted you with a hashbrown in his hand.

You swiftly took a piece of it and popped it in your mouth, “he’s just an online friend, keeping me company while you guys were gone.”

                This grabbed Kai’s attention, “where does he live?”

                “I have no clue.” You took a bite of your sandwich and Kai looked dumbfounded, usually in highschool when you guys met people online you two would just spew information like that (of course then being scolded by Yeonjun) and the recipient always gave the same information. This was truly shocking to Kai.

                “WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DON’T KNOW?”

You jumped at the sudden outburst, Futurama long forgotten you turned to him, “he is just more I dunno! He is really nice though.”

                “He didn’t even give you a COUNTRY?” Kai took a big bite into his sandwich.

                “Well… He has an accent… He sounds Australian so I just assumed I guess.” You realized how truly crazy you sounded.

                Kai started coughing and sat back, “HAS TWITTER AND RANDOM GAMES AND MESSENGER APPS TAUGHT YOU NOTHING? WHERE DID YOU EVEN MEET HIM!?”

                “…”

                “Y/n… Where did you meet this Felix guy...?” Kai side eyed you from his spot on the couch.

                “Club Penguin…”

                “Y/N!” The boy now sat back laughing at the situation.

You threw a piece of hashbrown at him, “I know other things about him! He is 22 and has a job where he works at a venue! And he has roommates, and his job is pretty serious!” You said in a matter-of-fact tone.

                “Okay okay!” Kai stopped teasing and looked at you, “what does he look like?”

                “…”

                “Y/N!”

After Kai teasing you more about your very mysterious friend you two headed to the bathroom. You guys had a mission, at the moment Kai had light brown hair that was growing out past his eyes. He was always bothered by it.

                “I think we have to dye your hair first and then cut it… Or is it the other way around.” You mumbled.

                “I thought we had to cut first then dye it.” He asked and sat down on the edge of the bathtub. You had to think for a second then you nodded. You went under the sink and fetched your hair cutting shears. Standing up you went back.

                “So, Mr. Kai what are we feeling today?” You put your hand on your hip.

                “Oh! Barber Y/n!!! I NEED THESE HAIRS OUT OF MY EYES! They’re like little daggers!!” Kai fake cried and you quickly got to work. It was mainly just a trim for him you weren’t licensed or anything so it’s not like he could ask for something crazy. You hummed to different songs on his playlist as you trimmed away.

                “What color are you thinking?” You made sure everything was even.

Kai contemplated and kicked his feet a bit, “ummm how mad would you be if I said I wanted to go platinum again?”

                “Like in senior year?” You asked and were impressed by his hair if you were being honest. You did good. It was even. Maybe you should’ve went to a trade school for hair or something.

                “Yes! Exactly like senior year!”

You took a deep breath, “we can try that!”

You were going to have to stock up on hair oils and hair masks after this. You grabbed the bowl and the dangerous bleach and activator and started to mix like you did when you made potions in your mom’s bathroom. You and Kai made small talk and then your phone buzzed. Deciding to ignore it you just continued bleaching Kai’s hair, it’s not like it was a Discord notification.

                “Oh, I wanted to talk to you about something…” Kai mumbled and looked up at you. You looked down on him and wrapped his head with the heating cap.

                “So, my family was planning on taking a trip yaknow…” He started prolonging whatever he was saying. You turned and walked to the mirror starting to bleach your own hair. Secretly you prayed this wasn’t going to be the day where you went bald due to noodle hair.

                “And they want to see yaknow… So yaknow…” Kai fiddled with his pants, you looked over at him with a small laugh.

                “No, I actually don’t.” You leaned against the counter and continued with your hair.

                “Well, Lea has really enjoyed working with you and becoming close with you and yaknow…” Kai sounded like he was really nervous. You turned to him; you were just about done with half of your head.

                “Kai, I love you but jeez man spit it out.” You started to laugh a bit.

                “They want to go to Seoul to visit my sister and Lea and I want you to come too.” He blurted out. Your jaw dropped.

                “Wait actually??” You looked at him with wide eyes. Kai frantically nodded. You grinned.

                “I will pick up more shifts!!!” You turned to do the rest of your hair.

                “Wait does that mean you’re gonna come with us?” Kai asked hopefully. You smiled at yourself in the mirror, then slightly turned to him.

                “Um DUH!”

After finishing your hair, you washed out Kai’s. Then came his toner, which you were going to split with him. Kai had ever so graciously bought your favorite color for your hair dye. You were excited. Hanging out with Kai was always something you did cherish; he was really nice and really saved you in high school and now college.

You two looked at yourselves in the mirror, hair now all done and you two dripped like wet dogs.

                “Wow.” Kai said and he touched his hair.

                “DO NOT PULL ON IT!” You said quickly and slapped his hand away from his head. He started laughing and grabbed a soft towel to squish his hair and yours.

                “So, when is this trip anyways?” You asked. You had to know so you knew how much time you had to save up money. You followed Kai into the kitchen.

                “Mmm.” Kai mumbled as he ate a piece of bread from the pantry.

                “Mmmarch? Mmmmay?” You perked up. He started laughing at you.

                “Maybe for Spring Break. But they also might schedule it in the summer, we still have school remember?” Kai said, “oh and please don’t tell your weird Club Penguin friend unless you have like facetimed him or something.”

You pretended to zip up your lips and put your pinky out. He rolled his eyes and completed your pinky promise. “I pinky promise that-" there was a ping and you started sprinting to the bathroom, it was a discord ping. Quickly unlocking your phone, you opened Felix’s message.

You froze, wait he wanted to see a PHOTO!? This was a little nerve-wracking. Okay wait y/n THINK! What if you just showed a little sliver of your hair? That sounded pretty okay, or maybe like a mirror selfie with your phone covering your face. Wait you wanted to see his hair too… Before you went to take a photo, you texted him saying you wanted to see his hair too. To your surprise he said okay. NOW YOU WERE REALLY NERVOUS.

You quickly looked up and took like 80,000 mirror selfies to only fear sending all of them. Finally, about another couple minutes you just decided fuck it, you took one you thought was nice and sent it! No other second thought!

Oh my god his eyes are so pretty, and you could see a hint of his freckles... WAIT! HE HAS FRECKLES. UGH! Why does someone so mysterious have to be so attractive to you?

You found yourself giggling at your phone, he was so cute. You really did love talking to Felix, and you couldn’t wait now that you’d get to call him again.

                “Is that Felix?” Kai asked leaning over your shoulder.

You jumped and looked up at him with a bashful grin, “yeaaaah…”

Kai rolled his eyes and smiled back, “I am gonna make dinner, do you want me to make that soup you like?”

“Yes!!!” You quickly followed him to the kitchen. The rest of the night you two decided to put on some random reality TV show then hit the hay. You figured since Felix was on a plane it would take a while for him to call so that would be good sleep time. Plus, you had a shift the next day with Lea in the afternoon, sleeping early and getting to call Felix before work sounded really nice. Just in case… you decided to be ballsy and text him your number too. You did your nightly routine and snuck into your covers, you made sure to keep your ringer on in case he calls you. That night you went to sleep with a smile on your face, eager to hear his voice again. It was so crazy to you how quickly and easy it was to want to be around him.

--------------------------------------------------------------------- Taglist: @bloofairyfox @yellowroses-world @g4m3girl @forevrglow

Taglist is always open :) --------------------------------------------------------------------- Author's note: Hi everyone! I wanted to post this right now because I am going to campus today with a friend. It's technically her campus not mine but we will ignore that lol. I am hoping to finish up to chapter 8 of this story while I am there, on top of homework!

Ugh also, I am literally so SORE. I really need to learn to pace myself when it comes to working out. Plus practicing what I preach lol! Instead of having coffee today my mom got this like plant based energy thing??? Idk what it is but it tastes really good! Remember to give healthy alternatives a shot sometimes! You never know what you will find or taste!

I hope everyone is doing well today! I still feel bad about yesterdays .5 chapter being really short! So once again I apologize for that! I am actually starting to write them a lot longer. The word doc to this story is over 50 pages! How crazy is that! I am really thankful to everyone who loves this series, it really means a lot to me and I haven't gotten this much enjoyment from writing since middle school. Thank you guys for igniting this spark again, I will always be forever thankful <3 Have a good day or night everyone! I love you!

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