#honestly i just wanted an angry remus

[luveline]

Ok what about a lil fic of Remus being snappy with his gf leading up to the full moon? Just some angst and then fluffy ending with them reconciling

thank u for ur request! —remus says something he shouldn't before the full moon, and later campaigns for your forgiveness with affection and a confession. fem!reader, 1.2k

Remus lays on the couch with his forearm pressed to his eyes. It's the day before the full moon, and he feels the hours approaching like a death sentence every time. You hover in the doorway, watching, unsure of how to help. He gets the same every month (or rather, every cycle). 

Irritable. So anxious he can't breathe properly, let alone enter conversation. 

You hate seeing him like this. Your Remus, who spends every moment you're together trying to make sure you're as happy as you can be. 

Cautious, you round the sofa to crouch by his face. You hold out your hand, trailing a gentle fingertip down the length of his arm, tripping over pinched skin ridged by scars. He's beautiful no matter what, but he gets insecure about how he looks every full moon. You know he thinks he's a monster. You've no way to prove it to him beyond this. 

"Hey, handsome," you say softly. "I know you're not hungry, but I made dinner anyway if you feel up to it. And I know," —you drop your voice to a near whisper— "I know you're not in the mood, but I'm here. I can sit here and stroke your hair in silence all night if that's what you want, my love. I'll do whatever you want." 

"Then leave me alone," he says. 

Half snap, half firm defeat. You wince at the ire in his voice. It won't ever be nice to have someone you love speak to you like you're getting on their nerves, but you know what it is he's facing. You know this is hard for him to cope with. You can forgive him for everything if he makes it through this in one piece. 

"Okay. I'm sorry. I love you, Remus." 

He turns his head toward the sofa cushions. 

You leave the room with a heavy heart. In the kitchen, you try to eat, but every mouthful makes you feel sick, your eyes welling with tears as you chew. You're hurt, he's hurting, and this really, really sucks. 

The smell of dinner starts to amplify the nausea. You grab your plate and carry it to the back door, scraping your leftovers straight into the rubbish. You wash your plate and leave it to drip dry on the draining board, your eyes burning. You sniff, wiping your nose in your sleeve. 

You're hoping desperately that Remus will come around before bed, but he stays where he is. Thinking he's finally found sleep and wanting to leave him to that blissful reprieve, you creep through the living room and down the hallway into the bedroom. Tears fall as you change into your pyjamas. You're so tired that you barely have time to cry yourself to sleep. 

You're not sure how much longer it is when you wake. A familiar hand cups your cheek. 

From the warmth of your skin, he's had his hand there for a while. 

"I'm so sorry," Remus says. 

You don't know how he knows you're awake. He must have been watching you long enough to spot the difference. Honestly, you're not sure you want to see him yet, because you love him so much, and it breaks your heart to be at the end of his disdain even when you know the cause. 

You struggle to see him in the dark. 

"I should never have spoken to you like that." 

Your eyes close of their own accord, exhausted and sore from crying. "You didn't mean it." 

"I wish you'd shout at me," he murmurs, sliding his hand over your ear. His thumb draws along the shell of your ear. 

"I'm too tired," you mumble. 

Remus' head shifts closer to yours. Sharing the same pillow, his hand falls to your shoulder, his arm wrapping around you, a firm bicep pressed to your front. 

You let yourself lean into it. His breath warms the space between your brows. 

"It's no excuse, but I… I can't think of anything else but the pain, sometimes. I get so angry about it, because I'm–" He stops short, swallowing audibly in the otherwise silent room. "I'm scared. But I would be a hundred times more terrified if I didn't have you, knowing you're there for me, unflinchingly, before and after it happens, it helps me get through it. It's not fair that you give me so much peace and I just… 

"I'm sorry, dove. I don't mean to take advantage of your… heart." He says heart like he's been winded. He hadn't sounded finished, but everything stops at that word. 

You force your eyes open. He's looking at you with an unspeakable amount of love, kind to keel you over if you were standing. His eyes are pitch black in the lack of light, irises melded with pupils, giving him an even sorrier gaze. You raise a sluggish hand to his where it rests behind your back and pull it back to your face. You miss his touch. 

"I love you," you say. 

"I know," he says, his jaw tensing in an attempt to stage off tears. "I love you, too." You watch them collect in the corners of his eyes, following one as it slides to rest in the dip of his nose bridge while he lies on his side like this. 

"So don't be sorry." 

"But I am sorry. I can't fathom why I think it's okay to treat you that way." 

"You don't think at all, Remus. I'm not being flippant, but you're busy worrying about the worst of it." You shake your head gently. His hand twitches against your cheek. "I don't blame you." 

"I know," he utters. 

You stare up at him as he sits enough to tower over you. His smile is sorry, in love and ashamed. You want to tell him how it doesn't matter, that it's okay, but you're thinking maybe you need him to say it first. 

"I'm sorry." 

"Remus, you only told me to leave you alone." 

"I need you to know that any other time, you're all that I want. You're everything. I couldn't ask for more than you. Please don't think I'm cruel," he pleads in a whisper. 

You lift your chin incrementally. "I'd never think that." 

His apology kiss is coddling. Like he's worried he'll hurt you, like he's holding back, he kisses you like you can't handle more than a chaste press of the lips. 

"I love you," he says into it. 

You lift your head to kiss him harder. You love him, and you won't break. You can be exactly as strong as he needs you to be, so long as love waits at the end of the night. 

"I love you." A huff of a laugh escapes him. "Does this mean I'm forgiven?" Caution has his joke falling flat.

You nuzzle your cheek against his, knowing you'd forgiven him just as soon as he'd snapped. "If you let me stroke your hair. Did you eat your dinner?" 

"I'll eat it tomorrow," he says. A white lie, you both know, but he slides down further under the sheets so you can reach his head. 

You card your fingers through his hair until you've both fallen asleep. 

#remus lupin x reader #remus lupin x fem!reader #remus lupin fluff #remus lupin x you #remus lupin x y/n #marauders era #remus x reader #remus x you #marauders #remus lupin drabble #remus lupin blurb #marauders x reader #remus lupin imagine #remus lupin fanfic #remus lupin fanfiction #the marauders

[inkdrinkerworld]

Dealer!remus and autistic!reader’s relationship starts off so rocky guys let me tell you!!! Angst to fluff

Remus doesn’t fully get that he can’t just say things- like he’s got to be deliberate and conscious of the words he uses and his tone.

He’s never had to do that before so it’s weird and it’s hard to learn and he slips up sometimes.

One of your biggest arguments happens when he’s frustrated and you’re just trying to help.

You’d seen him so sullen and moody on James’ story so you decided to do for him, what you do for yourself.

You baked.

But then you realized you’re not at the stage where you know his absolute favourite type of cookie so you go a little all out.

You bake chocolate chip biscoff cookies. Chocolate chip toffee cookies, regular chocolate chip and brown butter chocolate chip.

You set them in a cute box and you text Remus that you’re coming to see him. You’re thinking everything’s going to go well, you’re gonna drop the cookies off for him, maybe he’s going to tell you what’s bugging him- maybe not; either way he won’t be alone.

Except you get there and immediately you feel like you’re inconveniencing him.

Try as you might not to take it personally, it’s really hard because he seems particularly peeved at you.

“Why are you here?” His tone is sharp and jagged and it winds you a little.

“I brought you cookies to cheer you up. Saw that you weren’t yourself on James’ story,” you keep your tone even, light- a practiced thing from your days of dealing with people that didn’t quite get you.

“Why would that cheer me up?” At this point everything’s going downhill fast and you try to salvage what little is left of your deflated cheeriness and open up the box to display the array of cookies.

Remus at the same time waves his hand and the box goes pitching across his living room floor and he explodes.

You can’t remember the last time someone had yelled at you like that and honestly, it hurt more coming from Remus who was so normally relaxed and chilled.

You don’t even tell him goodbye, you just clean up all the mess while he’s cursing and yelling and then leave.

What’s twists the bloodied blade in the wound is that he doesn’t even try to stop you or reach out to you for three days.

By which point you’ve already gone mostly nonverbal and you’re in no mood to entertain or fake a personality for the sake of your friends when you do see them.

Remus stops at your house after you ignore three invitations to his place.

“Dove, I know you’re at home. Can you open the door please?” His voice is muffled through the hard wood of the door and you have half a kind to leave it shut- he’d been mean, he’d said things that were very hurtful now that you’ve actually processed what he’s said fully.

You don’t know if you can stand to see him. Then he knocks again, “I want to look at you when I apologise, sweet girl. Please open the door.” And the wholesale remorse in his tone shakes your core and you cave.

He steps inside with a box and three tulips. “I figured I’d have had to do it face to face for it to really mean anything and because I realized I was an absolute prick to you when you just came over to help.”

You don’t even hum. Usually, when he was nice Remus- as you’ve differentiated in your head - you’d be able to look him in the eyes every couple of words, but right now you just look over his shoulder.

“I shouldn’t have yelled or sworn at you like that. It wasn’t cool and I never want to speak to you like that- ever. I was an idiot and I just want to make up for it.”

There’s about a minute where Remus thinks he’s just fucked every single bit of progress you’ve both made with each other and then you let out a big breath.

“You can’t say things that you don’t mean just because you’re upset. What you said really hurt my feelings and I don’t like feeling the way you made me feel when you were that angry. If we continue to be friends you can’t do that because it makes it hard for me to trust you and find what you’re saying believable.”

Your voice is hoarse and crackly from lack of use and Remus feels even worse. “I’ll do better, I swear. It wasn’t my intention to hurt you- it’ll never be, but I am sorry that I did.”

You nod once, succinct and definitive. Remus holds out the box to you, showing a puzzle you’d been eyeing for a while.

“Can we build it together?” He asks softly, an ebb of vulnerability given away as you catch his eyes.

“Okay, but we have to do corners first, then work our way in.” Remus nods, his other hand holding the flowers for you. The tulips are a pristine white.

“The lady at the shop said they’re good for conveying apologies.”

You smile a little, “These ones are also for condolences.” Remus shakes his head,

“Not this time,” he watches you put them in a vase of water. “Also, ‘if we continue to be friends’, thought we were a little closer than friends, sweet girl?”

He relishes in the way you bite your lip to hide your grin as you take the puzzle box from him and set it up on your coffee table.

“Well I wasn’t sure if you wanted to acknowledge it or not.”

Remus says very seriously as he sits opposite you at the coffee table, ducking down so he can catch your eyes as you take out the numbered bags. “I’m always acknowledging it, we’re more than friends dove. When everything’s not so fucked, I’ll take you out and do it with pink and red lilies.”

#remuslupin #remus lupin #remus lupin one shot #remus lupin fanfiction #remus lupin fluff #remus lupin drabble #remus lupin blurb #remus lupin imagine #remus lupin fic #remus lupin x you #remus lupin x yn #remus lupin x reader #remus lupin x black!reader #remus lupin angst #dealer!remus lupin #dealer!remus #tism🤝

[volturissideslut]

shy reader holds remus' hand for the first time in public

𝕽𝖊𝖒𝖚𝖘 𝕷𝖚𝖕𝖎𝖓

I took this prompt and i ran with it, enjoyyy!!!

Though you and Remus had been together for a while now - not long having passed that awkward and clunky talking stage - you still hadn't really been physically affectionate with one another. No sex, no kisses, no cuddles, and not even daring to engage in premarital hand holding.

It's not that you didn't want to. You did. You really really did. But every time you wanted to you were left unsure if it was okay to do that. Seeds of self doubt planted themselves in your mind and the longer you let them fester the more they weeded your thoughts. It honestly got to a tiring point, where if the thought of being affectionate with him made your hands clammy and your mind race, heat creeping its way up your neck. And obviously you didn't want him to feel like he had to hold your clammy sweaty hands, it's just... icky.

To put it simply, you had built it all up in your head and it desperately needed to be pulled down from that pedestal.

So now here you were, in the library with Remus, your lovely boyfriend, wondering if it would be okay to hold his hand. He was slouched over (in a posture that was definitely not good for his spinal health in the future) with one hand holding the hard back on the book, and the other lazily resting on the table. Resting mere millimetres from your own hand.

Unconsciously, your hand twitched, like when your body is so filled with emotion and just has to move. Like when you're angry and your jaw and fists clench. Like when you're excited and your hands shake and move and you talk. Like when you're anxious and your leg bounces. Like when you really want to be touching your boyfriend but don't know how to go about it, and your hand twitches.

One slight problem, your hand was so so close to his already that he thought you had tapped him and had put down his book to give you his full attention. And with that adorable small smile of his on his face too.

"You okay, Dove?"

... I mean, it's now or never right?

"Yeah - uhm - Rem, can I please hold your hand?" Why does your throat feel so dry? You had just had a nice cup of tea with him, and now its like you're parched all over again.

And while he notices your rising anxiety and shyness, he pays no mind to it for now. Instead his smile grows wide and smug, eyebrows raised in surprise. But his expression quickly returns to its normal state and his voice is smooth as he speaks, though it doesn't to much to hide his own light blush.

"Of course you can, Dovey"

Like the gentleman he is, he doesn't make too much of a show of it, already knowing the inner turmoil in your mind right now. Instead, he laces his fingers with yours and gives one firm reassuring squeeze and picks up his book. He also gives another squeeze when he feels you tense up and watch someone walk past your little corner of the library, a proud smile hidden behind his book as he physically feels your body relax because of his touch.

But now you know in your head that its okay. Hand holding officially being removed from the pedestal. And he can't even tell your hands are clammy, because his are too.

#x reader #headcannons #hc #marauders era #marauders blurb #marauders x reader #marauders x you #remus lupin x reader fluff #remus lupin fluff #remus lupin x reader #remus lupin #moony x reader #anything for our moony #moony wormtail padfoot and prongs #asks open #reqs open #volturissideslut

[moonstruckme]

What about Poly!marauders and reader who needs alone time to recharge. Like she's had a bad day or is stressed but actually needs them to leave her be for an hour rather than physically comfort her (but she still loves them ofc)

Ugh sooo relatable, like in theory I want to be cuddled and spoken to in soft tones but in reality I just need my bed and silence. I feel like the pacing on this was a bit off and I couldn't figure out how to fix it, so sorry about that but thanks for requesting!

poly!marauders x reader ♡ 481 words

They pick up on your mood as soon as you come through the door, which is as sweet as it is unfortunate. 

“Hey, sweetheart.” James’ voice is tentative, probing. “How was your day?”

“Fine,” you say shortly. “I’m going to shower.” 

He swivels his head to follow you with his gaze. “Everything okay?”

“Yup.” 

Remus steps out of the kitchen and into your way, brow already furrowed. “You showered just this morning. You need another so soon?”

You know he’s not concerned about your cleanliness habits so much as he’s dancing around what he really wants to ask. You’re acting weird, and you know that, but the last thing you feel like doing right now is explaining why. 

You look up at him, noticing Sirius turning around in the armchair in your periphery. The upset in your chest is growing with each well-meaning, troubled look your boyfriends send each other, each second you spend in their usually enjoyable presence. You don’t like how you feel right now, and you don’t like the angry person it makes you. “I just want to be alone for a bit, okay?” 

“What happened, baby?” Sirius opens his arms in invitation, cocking his head when you don’t accept. Thankfully, he looks more confused than hurt.

“Just a bad day,” you say honestly, doing your best to sound kind as your patience wanes thin. You know they only mean well, but everything is too much right now, and it will be until you get some time to recharge. “Can I just go, please?”

James’ eyes look conflicted behind his glasses, distress written plainly across his features. “I’m sorry you had a bad day, lovely. Isn’t there anything we can do, though?”

You take a deep breath. “Listen, I appreciate that you want to help, but I just need some time to myself. It wasn’t that bad a day, I’m just…I need to calm down, alone.” Sirius is beginning to look even more concerned, but you go on. “I can tell you guys about it later, if you want, but I just really, really don’t feel like it right now.” 

A long-fingered hand settles on your shoulder, thumb rubbing at the tense muscles there. “Take all the time you need, dove,” Remus soothes. “The bedroom’s empty, we can leave you be in there for a while if you’d like.” 

You relax ever so slightly. “That’d be great, thanks.” 

“Hey, just text one of us if you want us to bring dinner in,” Sirius adds. “Hope you feel better, baby.” 

You send them all a smile as you disappear down the hall, closing the bedroom door behind you. You shrug on one of James’ t-shirts, and the sheets smell like all of you as you slip between them. You take some deep breaths, letting the familiar aroma pacify you as slowly, you begin to feel grounded in yourself again. 

#poly!marauders #poly!marauders x reader #poly!marauders x fem!reader #poly!marauders x y/n #poly!marauders x you #soft angst #poly!marauders soft angst #poly!marauders fanfiction #poly!marauders fanfic #poly!marauders fic #poly!marauders imagine #poly!marauders drabble #poly!marauders oneshot #poly!marauders scenario #james potter #sirius black #remus lupin #james potter x reader #sirius black x reader #remus lupin x reader #the marauders #marauders #marauders era #marauders fanfic #marauders fic #marauders fanfiction #marauders fandom #the marauders era

[luvendiary]

of moons and crowns / r. lupin

remus lupin x reader; royal!au

part 2

a/n: hiiii! i've been mia for a bit now. life's been pretty hectic. i've had this one on the drafts for a really long time, so in my spare time i've been slowly adding to it, and i think i got carried away. there's a part 2 in the works, so let me know if you'd like to see that. also i'm really sorry for all the requests i haven't put out. there's some that i have already started. i'll try my best to get to them. but honestly, i try to work on what inspires me rather than the order in which they were sent since i can't dedicate a lot of time to this anymore because of college. as always, let me know what you think. also, i think this is the first marauders fic i publish!

summary: the life of a servant in the palace was hectic. the life of a servant in the palace who so happened to get along with the princes, was even more so.

It wasn’t everyday that a royal ball was announced. Especially not one where the three crowns would be attending. 

The kingdom was buzzing with excitement, and even whilst doing your daily chores you could not be spared of the gossiping and chattering.

“Do you think that both Black princes will attend?” one of the maids -Lucy- asked dreamily from across the small pond you were washing your clothes at. 

“I sure hope so!” another chimed in. “But I have my eye on the Crescentwatch prince…” she continued dreamily.

“I’ve heard he is quite handsome”, you said with a giggle. As you couldn’t help but to offer your two cents of the conversation. 

“You already have two handsome princes in your palm,” she said in a joking manner. “Leave some for the rest of us.”

“I can assure you Eva, that Sirius and I have no romantic intentions with each other. And as for James…well, he is James”, you explained simply as you splashed a bit of water into your fellow maid,

Your friendship with the princes was a strange phenomenon. Royalty would usually limit themselves with interactions amongst their social ranking, however thanks to your time working with the Most Noble House of Black, an out-of-odds friendship had sparked with the heir. Truth was, your time with them had not been a fairy tale. In fact, it had been quite the opposite. You had experienced their abuse and mistreatment first hand whilst working for them. And last time the Blackhaven monarchs had visited the kingdom, they made sure to make your life impossible, just for old times sake. You were no stranger to the Kingdom of Blackheaven’s tyrant rulers. But you were also no stranger to the kindness of their heir. Sirius Black had been your only distraction from the torment of the monarch’s unending chores.

Your friendship with Sirius started one night when he found you out in the gardens after a particularly cruel punishment from King Orion. Your hair was a mess, and angry tears had rolled down your blotched face. 

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

You had been pacing angrily and muttering to yourself about how you would give him a piece of your mind one day. How you couldn’t care less about losing your head if that meant you could be far from them. 

In a moment of pure anger and frustration, your hand flew out in a fist and hit a tree. You had immediately regretted that, as all you received back was a pair of bloody knuckles. 

“You might want to be more careful”, an amused voice said, immediately flooding you with panic. The previous heat that had been flowing through your body because of the anger vanished. Being replaced with dreadful cold instead. 

“Your majesty…” you breathed out, as you straightened your posture. There in front of you stood Sirius Black in all his glory. His long hair was tied up, and his white shirt was sloppily tucked in his waistband. 

For a brief moment you considered acting as if nothing had happened. As if he hadn't caught you cursing the absolute hell out of his parents. But you were tired. You could not put up a front anymore.

Your body deflated visibly once again, and you ran a hand through your hair. 

“I would say that I’m sorry for my imprudent behavior, my prince. But that would be a lie”.

A moment of silence passed between you two. You patiently waited for him to say something. A death sentence maybe. However the next thing that came out of his mouth was far from that. 

Laughter boomed from deep within his chest, making your head snap up immediately. Was he mocking you? Was death just a joke to him? For a brief moment you chastised yourself from expecting anything different from the Black Heir. After all, the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree. 

“I would greatly appreciate it if you didn’t mock me. I doubt that death is a laughing matter, even for royalty”.

Sirius’ laughter dissolved into small chuckles. “Death? What do you mean?”

“My execution. I got punished earlier today because I poured the king the wrong type of wine. I highly doubt that you'll let me off the hook with just a warning for badmouthing them”.

A flash of anger and hurt passed through Sirius’ eyes before a soft grin adorned his features. “Lucky for you, I’m not my parents”.

Confusion made its way to your features. “So you won’t kill me?”

“Why would I do that?” he said approaching you. He inspected you for a moment before taking your hand and eyeing your bloody knuckles. 

He dragged you to a nearby bench and without hesitation ripped a part of his shirt before proceeding to carefully -but sloppily- wrap your wounds with it.

You stayed quiet through it all. The correct thing would have been protest and decline his acts of service. He was royalty after all, and you were supposed to be attending him. But you were so tired. 

“Let me see it”, he spoke up after a while. 

“What?” 

“Your punishment”.

You glanced up at him with tired eyes. You considered sparing him from the sight of the marks on your back. But to hell with everything. He should know what his servants were going through under his father’s reign. He was going to be king one day after all, and he needed to know if a change was going to be made.

You turned your back to him and carefully unbuttoned the back of your dress. The fabric had been scratching at your new injury, making it redder than it already was. 

There in between your shoulder blades was a deep scorch mark in the shape of  the king’s crest. The wound was deep from the several burnings you had gotten over the years. Some were even unaligned from their usual place. A result of your trashing and pleading for mercy.

You expected a gasp or an indication of surprise from the prince. But you heard nothing. Instead, from your peripheral vision you saw him uncorking a small vial of a dark purple paste. He dipped his fingers into it and carefully smeared it on your back. 

The cool sensation of the paste combined with his fingers on your skin and the stinging of your wound, made you tense up. 

“I’m no stranger to my father’s rage” he whispered.

Only then did it occur to you that the rumors of Sirius’ rebellious personality and his constant acting out in events might not please Walburga and Orion. 

“Has he branded you too?” you asked bluntly.

“Yes, but not with the family crest. That would mean that he’d had to consider me his property. And if it were up to him, he would have disinherited me a long time ago”, he explained as he closed the vial. “He prefers a simpler method when it comes to me”, he continued. 

You did not expect him to show you anything. Royalty tended to protect their honor in that way. They didn't want to appear weak, especially not in the presence of their subjects. But Sirius kept surprising you. Slowly, he untucked his shirt and lifted it just enough for  you to see the lash marks that peeked over his stomach and seemed to take root from his back. 

You didn’t say anything. Your hand twitched in your lap, aching to trace the scars and maybe provide the same attendance that he had offered you. But you stopped yourself and instead just looked at him, eyes full of exhaustion. 

“Why haven’t you abdicated? You can get out of here. I’ve heard of your friendship with Prince James and Prince Remus. Everyone knows that the Noblehaven royal family would take you in in a heartbeat”.

He chuckled. “I hardly think it's fair to leave my kingdom behind. I want to free my people of my parent’s torture. And I think that his anger is a sign that I’m going in the right direction. It means that I’m making  changes -changes he doesn’t approve of”.

You chuckled. “I’d hardly call getting drunk during the Queen’s Jubilee making changes”. 

He laughed. “No one ever speaks to me like that”.

“Does that mean that I just got myself a death sentence?” 

He smirked, “It means I like you. You say what you mean. Unapologetically”.

You chuckled and smiled to yourself. You wouldn’t admit it to him, but you thought you liked him too.

Ever since then, your meetings with Sirius had become more frequent. Whenever his father decided to punish either of you, the other would attend to their wounds. You would both bond over your dislike for his parents and would never fail to make the other laugh. 

It wasn’t until one particular bad punishment that Sirius decided he needed to get you out of there as quickly as possible. So against your wishes, he arranged for you to be presented as a “gift”  to the royal family of Noblehaven. 

“You can’t be serious!” you screamed as you stormed into his chambers.

“I’m always Sirius,” he said, unbothered by your anger.

“You can’t just gift me away! I won’t go!”

Sirius closed his book and slowly looked up at you. “I’ll miss you too. I’ll miss you so much. But I can’t keep seeing you get punished. It’s not fair. I already talked with James. He’ll take care of you. You’ll be in good hands, I promise”. You noticed a teary smile make its way to his face. “You’ll be safe”.

You tried to stay mad, you tried so hard to not break. But a sob managed to escape your lips and you crushed into his body as you wrapped your arms around his torso. 

“I can’t leave you Sirius. I can’t go knowing you’re still here. Who will take care of your wounds?”

He laughed, amused by your protests. Truth was, you did so much more than just take care of his wounds. He couldn’t imagine his life these past years without you. But for your own good, he will have to now. “I can manage”, he replied as he hugged you back and buried his nose in your hair.

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

The Noblehaven royals had done right by their promise. They provided you with far more commodities than the Blacks ever did. You had also managed to befriend Prince James. You often found him in the halls and he made sure to send a flirty comment your way, which you always replied with a sickly sweet voice, pretending to swoon with his advances. Your whole act was amusing for him. Which is why he also liked to search for you whenever you had work to do, so he could chat your ear off. 

It was to no surprise then, that when the ball was announced, James had come running to you to give you the news. You were over the moon when you realized you’d see Sirius again soon, which had put you in a fantastical mood for the rest of the day. Perhaps in too good of a mood, since you had forgotten that Sirius would not be coming alone.

Your thoughts were interrupted by the sound of your fellow maids, as they called out your name. You hadn’t realized you had been harshly scrubbing the coarse fabric against your skin, causing it to turn visibly red. You looked up to find the girls already looking at you with amused expressions.

“I think someone’s waiting for you,” one of them said as she subtly signaled to something behind you. 

Following her gaze, you came to find none other than James standing by the outhall of the gardens. Your heart immediately jump started. He could possibly bring news of Sirius.

“I’ll be right back,” you said, smiling apologetically at your friends.

The two of them giggled before easing your worries, offering to take your basket of unwashed clothes in with them if you weren’t back by the time they were done. 

You thanked them quickly before skipping over to the prince.

“Your highness”, you said as you curtsied.

James chuckled and offered you a little bow of his own. “My lady, I bring pleasing news for you”.

“Get over with it James!” you said as you punched him lightly. “Sirius is coming right? Will I be able to see him? Please don’t let me be their maid in waiting again!”.

“Calm down dearest”, he said as he patted the arm that had been previously interlocked with his. “The Blacks did send in a particular request for you, and unfortunately it’s not mine to deny”.

Your posture deflated immediately. You were so lost in your thoughts that you hadn't noticed James leading you to the guest wing of the palace.

“We're here…” he said as he let your arm go. 

Your eyes immediately went wide. “They're here already?!” you whispered harshly. “I can’t go in there! They’ll kill me if I show up like this!” you rambled as you pointed to the tethered dress you wore. 

“It’ll be alright. I won’t leave your side”, he assured you. Although his words did little to calm you down, you knew they couldn’t cause you actual harm in here. Which is why you weren’t throwing an absolute fit over the situation. You were a maid after all, and it was your duty to do as the royals requested.

You sighed and attempted to fix your clothes along with your wild hair which had begun to set itself free from the braid you had constricted it into just this morning. “I thought you were supposed to give me good news…” you mumbled before straightening up and reaching for the door handle, missing completely the grin James was trying to suppress.

You prepared yourself mentally for facing the two most terrible people you ever had the displeasure of meeting. But you were surprised to find one figure instead of two. He was the same as his father, except that he was totally different in all the right ways. His sharp features had never looked so beautiful to you, and his tied up hair was a good sign. He felt comfortable.

Your hands immediately flew up to cover your mouth and you felt your knees buckle. “Sirius…” you whispered as a huge smile morphed your face.  

“Well, don’t just stand there…” he said with a laugh as he opened his arms, inviting you in for a hug. 

You wasted no time immediately running up to him and jumping into his arms. “I’m so happy to see you!”

“I´m happy to see you too,” he said. You felt his chest rumble with deep laughter, and it just settled in the fact that he was here.

“Oh god…” you separated immediately from him. “Where are your parents? They're going to kill me”, you whispered frantically.

“That's the best part,” James jumped in as he wrapped his arm around Sirius cheerfully. “They are not coming”. 

The revelation that the dreaded Black monarchs were not attending the royal ball lifted a tremendous weight off your shoulders. The relief was palpable, and you couldn't help but feel grateful to whatever twist of fate had kept them away.

Sirius noticed your visible relief and chuckled, a mischievous glint in his eyes. "No need to worry. James and I have our ways of handling them. We convinced them that attending this ball would not align with their interests. Besides, they've grown tired of these social gatherings."

You exchanged a glance with James, who winked at you playfully. It seemed the princes had orchestrated this whole scenario to ensure your peace of mind. Your gratitude towards them deepened, and you couldn't help but smile at the thoughtfulness of your friends. You also couldn't help but to think of what Sirius had implied. It wasn’t in the likes of the Blacks to show weakness such as exhaustion. They would always make sure to show other kingdoms their coldness and unwavering manner. But if what Sirius said was true, maybe Walburga and Orion’s reign was coming to an end. Maybe it was finally time for Sirius to step up to the throne and finally lead Blackhaven into prosperity. No wonder he looked so healthy. 

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

As the days leading up to the royal ball unfolded, life within the palace took on a whirlwind of excitement and preparation. Noblehaven was adorned with flowers, banners, and elaborate decorations, creating an enchanting atmosphere in anticipation of the grand event.

Sirius and James, with their usual mischievous flair, took it upon themselves to involve you in the preparations. You had already told them -repeatedly- that your attendance at the ball was not assured, and even if it was it would not be as a guest, but rather as a servant. That did not discourage them, however, from imagining your dress, which was starting to sound more like an elaborate pastry to you.

In the midst of this bustling activity, you found yourself navigating the corridors of the palace on an errand to deliver a message for King Fleamont, James's father. The palace, as majestic as it was, could be quite confusing for someone not accustomed to its intricacies.

In your rush to fulfill your duty, you turned a corner and collided with a figure rushing in the opposite direction. Books and papers scattered across the floor, and the collision left both of you momentarily stunned.

"I'm so sorry! I should have been more careful," you exclaimed, hastily bending down to collect the fallen items. Heat rushed to your face, praying to whoever was listening that this mysterious figure was not any sort of royalty. 

A warm chuckle reached your ears, and you looked up to find a young man with sandy-brown hair and gentle hazel eyes, who was also crouched down, gathering the scattered belongings. Your first instinct was to plead for him not to worry about the mess you had just made, but one look at him had you speechless. 

"No, it's my fault. I was not looking where I was going," he replied with a smile, handing you a few loose papers.

Standing in front of you was none other than Crescentwatch’s own heir, Remus Lupin himself. 

You had heard James and Sirius talking about him. Everyone knew they were basically brothers. The other maids also talked a lot about him. His handsome face, his mysterious scars, his dreamy eyes, and his soft hair. But for some reason you had always seemed uninterested in the topic. You supposed that royal gossip wasn’t as entertaining when you were so close to it. You had enough things to deal with with James and Sirius, adding another royal to the mix didn’t sound as appealing, especially if he would be as rambunctious as the other two. 

Still, the prince’s handsome features were not lost on you.

“I'm so very sorry your majesty!” you said as you offered him a curtsy. 

“Oh please- that's not- '' his words were cut short by a louder voice coming from down the hallway that called your name.

“I've been looking all over for you!” James said as he jogged up to the pair. Next to him, Sirius’ grin widened as he realized who you had just bumped into.

“Ah! So you’ve finally caught the third prince uh?”

“I-” you looked frantically between the three men who now blocked your way to King Fleamont’s study. “I’m sorry, I should’ve looked where I was going”, you said frantically trying to get past them.

James laughed. “I hope that you’re on your way to try your dress on”, he teased.

“Are you sure you’d like to know about my dress or are you more interested in Princess Lili’s gown?” you shot back as you reorganized your papers and combed a hand through your messy-looking hair. 

Sirius laughed, Remus chuckled and James turned red. “That’s what I thought”, you mumbled pleased with yourself. “Besides, the only gown I’ll be wearing is my uniform. The fancier one, if you’d like details.”

Sirius groaned. “But you were supposed to be my date!”

You rolled your eyes and sighed. You would’ve loved to attend the ball with them. They were your closest friends. Despite that, you could not ignore your social standing. It would not be appropriate for a prince (a crown prince, at that), to be seen in such a formal event with a servant. 

“I already get enough comments on how I charmed my way into your bed and out of Blackhaven Sirius. I don’t need more of those, especially when they aren’t true.” 

Sirius sighed dramatically.

Remus spoke up then, “what about me?”

Your shocked expression made a small smile appear on his face. Up until now he had watched you retaliate James’ and Sirius’ comments with ease. Leaving you speechless was something he prided himself with. Even if you had just met a few moments ago, both princes would not stop talking about you. 

“What about you, your majesty?” you asked.

He chuckled at the title. “What if you were my date?”

You glanced around at the boys. James’ mouth hung open, and Sirius had an unbelieving smile on his face. 

“You sly dog…” you heard the latter mutter as you gently tapped Jame’s chin close. 

“Is that an order?” you asked with a small tilt of your head. You still weren’t sure where exactly you stood with him.

“It’s an invitation,” he replied, without missing a beat. 

After a moment of silence -and uninterrupted eye contact with the Crescentwatch prince- a small smile broke its way onto your face, despite you trying to remain serious. 

“Goodbye your majesty,” you said with a curtsy, before turning around and resuming your way to King Fleamont’s study. 

Silence remained amongst the three boys. Each still trying to comprehend what had just happened. 

“So the good news is…”, James said after a moment. “That wasn't a no”.

That seemed to break Sirius off his trance as he jumped onto Remus and started blabbering about how he didn’t know he had it in him. 

Remus however, did not hear a single thing his friends were saying. With a smile still gracing his features, he wondered what his next move would be.

#remus x reader #remus lupin x reader #x reader #remus lupin #marauders era #marauders #james potter #sirius black #remus john lupin #royal au #marauders royal!au

[cryonme]

— 𝐖𝐞'𝐥𝐥 𝐍𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐇𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐒𝐞𝐱

— Remus Lupin x fem!reader

— summary: you're used to boys wanting one thing and one thing only from you, causing you to be thrown off when Remus Lupin kisses you, just to kiss you. based off of "We'll Never Have Sex" by Leith Ross.

for @fairydxll 's 2k writing celebration! sorry it took so long, angel.

prompts: "I think I'm in love with you and I'm terrified." + "Please never stop smiling."

word count: 2.5k

— tw: slut shaming (ew, i know), alcohol, marijuana, cursing, mentions sex. mainly fluff ewwww ;)

— a/n: eek! i've been wanting to do a fic based off of this song for a while now, and i thought it would work so well with these prompts I simply couldn't resist!! i'm sorry its been so long since i've uploaded a fic, life has been really hectic and honestly really shitty and sitting down to write has been hard, but I'm so happy i finally finished this one. hope you all love it like I do!! xoxo Miz

═════════════════

“Heard (Y/n) (Y/l/n)’s gonna be at the party tonight, she’s an easy target.”

Sirius Black didn’t even give his best friend a chance to react before he was smacking their fellow Gryffindor’s books out of his hands and straight to the ground, making them land with a dull thud that echoed through the corridors, never once turning his head to get a good look at the kid, he didn’t have to to know he was probably rat faced.

Remus didn’t say anything, but he had never been one to do so. He kept his eyes forward, piercing down the long hallway, but his anger showed in the tightness of his jaw and the white of his knuckled as his grip on his shoulder bag strap tightened, and if you looked close enough you could see the glint of a heavy sadness twinkle in his brown eyes, but only if you looked close enough, of course. 

Which Sirius had.

The darker haired boy opened his mouth to say something, anything to his best mate to get at least the ghost of a smile to graze his lips, but he quickly shut it when he saw you making a beeline for the two of them from the opposite direction, a bright smile plastered on your face.

And, suddenly, there was the light in Remus Lupin’s eyes.

“I am so ready to get absolutely plastered!” You enthused, your eyes wide with excitement as you linked arms with your two friends, looking back and forth between the two of them, patiently awaiting for excited smiles to grace their handsome features as well. But, when they both just nodded, pathetic smiles hanging loosely from their lips, your shoulders slumped.

“You’re not excited?”

“Of course we are.” Remus assured you, raising an eyebrow at Sirius.

Sirius had a terrible habit of telling you all of the nasty things they overheard about you around the school, not because he enjoyed the sad look in your eye or the occasional quiver of your bottom lip, but because he would get so angry he simply couldn’t help himself. He felt as though he would be doing you a disservice if he didn’t make you aware of how more than half of the student body felt about you. But it began to get to the point where it became useless, you already knew, why was there any point in informing you every time?

And why was there an issue? Why was it such a bad thing that you enjoyed hooking up? It wasn’t like more than half of the male student body wasn’t doing the exact same thing you were. You were just having fun, enjoying your young years and reveling in the perks of not wanting to be tied down just yet. It made the Marauders blood boil, hearing people talk about you so terribly like they weren’t doing the same thing.

“Ecstatic.” Sirius exhaled, sending you a soft smile and a wink, causing you to smile again.

The three of you continued to walk arm in arm to the common room, chatting about nothing and everything, summer plans, classes, the handsome dark eyed boy Sirius has his eye on, Lily and James, and just about everything in between until you reached the fat lady.

Sirius muttered the password and you brought your hands to your sides, breaking the chain between the three of you, causing a chill to go down Remus’ spine at the lack of your touch, the spot on his arm now felt cold.

“There they are! S’my best mates!” James came tumbling down the steps leading to the boys dormitories, a loose tie hanging from his neck and hair tousled in all different directions.

“Are you drunk already?!” Remus questioned, stifling a laugh.

James held his hands up in surrender, “Wha’s a party without a little pre party right lads??” He laughed before bringing his hand up to point to you. “You!”

“Me?”

“You! Go change and meet us in our dorm! Pre party!!”

You had barely opened your mouth to respond before James spun around on his heel and was bounding up the steps again, impressively not tripping over his own feet, with Sirius not far behind, yelling at James about how he hoped he saved some for him.

 You and Remus stood next to each other for a moment, amused looks adorning both your faces at the childish excitement from your two best friends over a Hogwarts house party, before you eventually turned to each other and giggled, both sets of cheeks flashing with heat.

“I’ll see you at the party then?” Remus asked, assuming there was no way you’d come to sit in their messy dorm hours before the party started, forced to watch Sirius and James argue over spells and the best pickup lines.

You nodded. “See you there, Moony.”

–

Remus had been right, of course, you did not join the boys in their dorm for drinks, instead deciding to take a nap before getting ready and taking your time on getting ready, before taking a couple photos with your roommates and having a couple quick drinks with them.

By the time you made it downstairs to the common room, the party was in full swing, drinks cluttered the tables, students were crammed on the couches, and the smell of smoke and firewhisky quickly invaded your lungs. You couldn’t help but smile at the atmosphere, you adored parties. There was always just a lighthearted and carefree vibe around them, you get a couple drinks in you and suddenly everyone is your best friend, your cheeks hurt from smiling, and the undeniable urge to dance all just tie together to create the perfect feeling in your chest.

And it doesn’t hurt when there’s a certain cutie you have your eye on that you can flirt with all night.

“Looking lovely as always.”

You turned your head as your eyes landed on your best friend and you smiled, trying so hard to ignore the warm feeling of butterflies in your stomach as his deep brown eyes looked into yours, a soft smile playing at his lips.

“Why thank you, Mr. Lupin.”

“Please, call me Remus.” He quipped, extending a hand out to you to assist you in walking down the remaining steps, only then had you realized you were still on the stairs.

“As you wish.” You joked back, a wink flickering across your left eye, and Remus swore if he had had just a couple more drinks his legs would have turned to jello.

Once you had made it down to even ground, a drink was being shoved into your hand by James, who’s bloodshot eyes were paired nicely with the poorly wrapped joint hanging from his lips.

“Where’s Lils?”

You smiled and took a swig from your drink, light happiness bursting through your chest at the love your best friends shared, they were better for each other than you could’ve ever imagined. 

“Should be right behind me.” You said, turning your head slightly to see if your best friend had made her way out of your room yet, but the only sight you were met with was James clammering up the steps to check on his girl.

You shook your head and giggled before turning your attention back to the taller boy, who had the same humorous expression on his face.

“Shall we?”

“We shall.”

–

“I’m telling you! Those are the exact words that came out of her mouth!” Sirius argued to the gaggle of friends, who all weren’t listening, too occupied by their fits of laughter and the joyful tears running down their faces to listen to their friend.

The black haired boy pouted and fell against the handsome Ravenclaw he had been wrapped around all night, who cooed and kissed the side of his face, although an amused glint still sparkled in his eyes.

You hadn’t even remembered what the story was, but now you couldn’t stop laughing, being egged on by the cackles of the rest of the group, and you clutched your stomach.

The party had completely died out, leaving just you and your closest friends on the common room couches, exchanging stories and cigarettes as soft music sounded from the record player in the corner.

And Remus’ hands hadn’t left your skin all night. 

They were constantly somewhere, one on your waist, your lower back, swung over your shoulder, the back of your neck, and currently, softly gripping your thigh.

You turned to look at him, a bright smile still beaming on your face before you lazily rested your head against his shoulder, prompting him to press a kiss to your hairline.

“You are so beautiful.” He whispered so softly that even you almost missed it and you felt heat rising up in your cheeks, bringing your head up to face him again, this time a softer smile on your lips.

“Please never stop smiling.” He breathed out, his face turned serious, eyes filled with devotion and warmth, quickly flickering to your lips before they went back to your eyes.

And he had you.

“I feel sick.” You announced suddenly to your friends, shooting straight up to your feet, causing Remus’ hand to fall. “M’gonna turn in.”

“Oh, love! Would you like help?” Marlene asked, leaning forward and gripping her hands around the armrest of her seat, ready to up and help you, despite the curly haired brunette sitting on the floor between her legs.

Remus caught on. “No, Marlene, you stay here. I’ll help her.” He insisted, standing up beside you, his hand ghosting around your waist.

“You’re sure?” She raised an eyebrow and Remus nodded, trying his best to ignore the knowing smirks of his fellow Marauders.

“It’s no problem.”

“Alright.” She answered hesitantly, eyes flickering over to you. “Come fetch me or Lils if you need, yeah?”

You nodded and bid your friends goodnight, snaking your fingers through Remus’ while allowing him to lead you up the stairs.

You were both giggling and tripping over your own feet as you got closer to your room, but a certain heaviness weighed on your chest when you remembered what he most likely wanted from you. Even though Remus was someone closer to your heart, he was still a boy, and it was something that all boys wanted from you, because they knew they could get it.

Sex.

You didn’t entirely mind, enjoying the no strings attached one night stand every once in a while, but it got to the point where most guys at Hogwarts wouldn’t even look in your direction unless they had a lustful intent, and sometimes, that stung.

But, you still let Remus into your room, you still locked the large oak door so you’d be left alone by your roommates, who you were positive were spending the night elsewhere, and you still looked up at Remus expectantly, breathing slightly heavy from running up the stairs and only a little dizzy.

The sandy haired blond was hard to read, his eyes didn’t leave yours as he set down his bottle of firwhisky with a thud on Lily’s dresser, and he brought one hand to grip the side of your neck, his thumb stroking your cheek bone, and the other on your hip.

Your heartbeat quickened as you rested a hand on his chest, the other holding the opposite side of his neck.

It was agonizing, the way he studied you, the way he leaned in closer only to place a chaste kiss on your jaw, earning a soft sigh from you as you fluttered your eyes close.

“Fuck.” He whispered before his lips were on yours, soft and gentle, barely parted as his grip on you barely tightened, just holding you.

And he pulled away, just like that.

“(Y/n).” He whispered.

“Yes?” You breathed out, head still spinning from the feeling of his lips on yours.

“Jus’ sayin’ your name.” He replied, his eyes scanning over every feature on your face, before pulling you in for another kiss, and you took the liberty of deepening it, leading him over to your bed before he pulled away from you, his hands gripping your shoulders. “Woah, woah. Hold on, love.”

Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion as you looked at him, slightly cocking your head to the side.

“You don’t want-”

Remus felt his heart break.

You thought he just wanted to fuck you.

“Darling…”

“W- why did you kiss me, then?” You asked, confusion plastered all over your face, arms dangling at your sides as you waited for Remus to answer, and his intoxicated brain couldn’t get a response out fast enough.

“Oh god, oh god.” Your eyes widened in horror and this time it was Remus’ turn to be confused. “I completely misread the situation. Fuck!” You frantically rubbed at your eyes, smearing black eyeliner and mascara all over the delicate white sleeves of your top. “Oh god, I’m so sorry Remus. I- I thought you were flirting and-”

The brown eyed boy was completely helpless and didn’t know what else to do besides grabbing your face to kiss you once more, breaking apart only a second later to rest his forehead on yours.

“Just to kiss you.” He responded to your question.

“What?”

“I kissed you, because I wanted to kiss you, love.”

Your eyebrows raised in understanding, a look of uncertainty in your eye.

“Just to kiss me? Not to-” You gestured to the bed, but Remus cut you off.

“No.”

You could’ve cried, right in that moment, you could’ve cried. Did your best friend love you the way you loved him? Was this really happening?

“And, and if I told you I didn’t want to be touched?”

He smiled, “I’d say you look lovely.”

“And if I told you I just wanted to lay with you and cuddle?”

“Happily.” He breathed, a look on his face that said that was the only thing he’d ever want from you.

“If I said we’ll never have sex?”

Remus laughed and shook his head at you, “Darling, I wouldn’t care.”

You smiled, and sighed with relief, falling into him, and he gladly wrapped his arms around you, swaying you back and forth.

“Rem.” You said after a few moments, voice muffled by the material of his shirt.

He hummed in response.

“I think I’m in love with you.”

He couldn’t believe what he was hearing, he pulled away from you in disbelief, staring and studying your face, looking for any hint of sarcasm or humor, but there wasn’t one. But there was a tear running down your cheek, and Remus was quick to wipe it away.

“And I’m terrified.” 

He frowned as your bottom lip quivered and your eyes lowered to the floor, ashamed to look at him. But Remus brought your head up to look at him by placing his thumb and pointer finger on your chin.

“Nothing to be scared of, dove. I love you more than you could ever know. I’m with you.”

═════════════════

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[let-roman-bite-someone]

it's been a while since i made an analysis here but as anyone else in this fandom, i've been speculating on orange. i know that by now, most people are convinced that orange is anger or something related to that.

however, we need to look at the previous patterns in order to figure out who orange might be. “the dark sides” were all facets of c!thomas that he was unwilling to accept or acknowledge. his anxiety, his ability and capacity for deception and probably the most jarring for him, the violent and/or disgusting thoughts that pop into his head without warning.

despite virgil's arc, anxiety was probably the easiest for thomas to accept. virgil didn't even have to introduce himself; thomas already knew he existed and while he was not happy about that, thomas had already accepted by that point that anxiety was a part of him. janus's existence was a harder pill to swallow and remus's was even harder.

so with all this, orange turning out to be anger (or wrath, rage, whatever you want to call it) would be a little underwhelming. while anger is not an emotion that is always encouraged, it's certainly not that hard to accept. especially compared to having repetitive intrusive thoughts about murdering people.

besides, thomas has already acknowledged his own capacity for anger before.

here, he refers to logan and roman having short tempers. they've shown this multiple times in the series too. if logan and roman are prone to anger, then it follows that thomas is also prone to anger and that he is aware of it. and regarding the nonchalant way he addressed it, i doubt he's troubled about his temper at all.

since there were only two short episodes before the introduction of virgil, we don't have enough context as to whether thomas was aware of his anxiety or how accepting he was of it. for janus and remus however, we have several instances of thomas either being in denial or being completely unaware of their existence.

regarding the concept of lying, thomas chose not to lie to people to the best of his ability. regarding intrusive thoughts, while there's no instances of thomas straight-up refusing to feed into them, he was a lot more "clean" before remus came along. he didn't swear as much and when he did, usually censored the swears (probably a conscious decision from thomas & co. but i think it had a canon reason too) and using more technical terms for sexual activities.

anyway, all of this is just a complicated way to get to the point, so i won't bore you any longer. my point is that orange would have to be something bigger, something more terrifying and that thomas would likely be in denial about.

one thing thomas has constantly been shown to fear is losing his friends and loved ones. this has surprisingly been a consistent theme from the early stages of the series.

a lot of the episodes like Making Some Changes, Can Lying Be Good and the SvS duology were centered around thomas's fear of losing his friends. friendship is very important to thomas and different situations in his life often feeds into the fear of being left behind.

now what is a common theme in all the scenes that orange has been hinted at?

the feeling of being ignored or belittled. logan gets mad at roman because roman mocks his attempts at trying to communicate honestly. SvS Redux has thomas feeling irritated and upset that lee and mary lee barely paid attention to him during the wedding. the intrusive thoughts asides video, of course, has both thomas and logan getting angry over being ignored.

so, with all this, i conclude that orange is desperation (n; a state of despair, typically one which results in rash or extreme behaviour). a need for validation, a need for attention and affection. thomas, at this point, is especially disturbed by a lot of things going on in his life. but a recurring theme throughout the show, especially after the introduction of janus and remus, is thomas's fear of driving away his friends. he is overly judgmental of each of his actions, worried that they may lead to him being lonely and left behind.

and again, in WTIT, thomas is also desperate to be noticed by nico. he fears dying alone but at the same time, he struggles to reach out to people. still, he makes the first move by texting nico but the fact that nico doesn't reply makes thomas more and more fearful of ending up alone. he is desperate for love and support, he is desperate for validation; but he needs to focus on himself and fix his own issues, if he wants to maintain a healthy relationship with other people.

like all the other sides, i think that orange is also only trying to help thomas. he's trying to get thomas to come to terms with the fact that nothing is stagnant. most things in life are temporary and the sooner you accept that, the sooner you'll be able to let go of any worries weighing you down. thomas just needs to face that fact and focus on living in the moment, instead of worrying about what could be. he also needs to have a little trust in himself and know that he's trying his best to be a good person.

and logan is the right person to target for this. because first off, logan himself is suffering from the desperate need for validation, he is visibly struggling to get to thomas. secondly, a sign of deteriorating mental health is when logic becomes clouded due to emotions and this affects a person's basic functioning, such as decision making, problem solving and if gone too far, even everyday activities. the one time logan temporarily left the group, we saw how much of a chaos the others were. i believe orange thinks that this is the only way to make thomas understand how dire the situation is.

so yeah, that's just my take on this whole orange deal. i could be completely wrong but it's still fun analyzing these things.

#sanders sides #janus sanders #logan sanders #roman sanders #virgil sanders #remus sanders #thomas sanders #patton sanders #sasi #tss #remus tss #janus tss #logan tss #patton tss #roman tss #virgil tss #ts sides #ts roman #ts logan #ts virgil #ts patton #ts janus #ts remus #orange #ts orange side #sanders sides orange #tw intrusive thoughts #tw mention of death

[thegoldfishkid13]

Reunited Regulus Black x reader

A/N: I am still taking request for any character seen on my masterlist. or most harry potter characters

Warning: Swearing, mentions of death, pregancy, fighting, mentions of suicide. It’s also not cannon,

Word count:2091

Standing in the kitchen you and Regulus are making dinner for yourselves and your daughter. She had some of her friends from Hogwarts over. Pansy Parkinson, Blaise Zabini, Enzo Berkshire, Theodore Nott and Mattheo Riddle. They all were slytherin, you went to school with most of their parents.

 “Harper! Come here!” Regulus yelled, his voice echoed through the house. You heard her door open and her stomp down the stairs. Attitude was coming and you knew it.

 “What?” Attitude dripped from her voice, nothing else.

 “Will you run and get a carton of milk? We are almost out.” Regulus asked. Her friends walked down the stairs and thanked you for hosting their get together, but they had to leave. Harper rolled her house at Regulus. But nonetheless she agreed. Her attitude was causing a real problem. 

 “Thank you.” He handed her money and went back to cutting vegetables. She left and you continue to work on the chicken. 

 “Her attitude is a problem, you know.” You spoke, it’s something that you had been wanting to talk about but never had the chance.

 “I have noticed, and it seems to be more to you than me. I’m not sure what started it but we should probably have a conversation with her to try and figure it out.” He agreed with your point. You sliced into a piece of chicken, almost cutting the corner of your hand. “It started when the slytherin group started coming ‘round.” He hummed in agreement. You threw the chicken in a pan and began to season it. 

 “I'm surprised her and Harry aren't friends. Honestly besides the fact that their cousins they seem to be the same person. Just different houses.” Regulus chuckled at your statement. Knowing what it was probably true. “I’m not even sure that they release that they're related.

 “Yeah, it seems to be that way.” Before you could continue there was a knock on the front door of your house. You put the knife down and opened the door. You're feeling a little annoyed because it's later in the evening and dinner time.

 “Can I help you-” The words didn’t even finish leaving your mouth. I stare at the group of strangers in front of me. Sirius Black, Molly Wesley, four of the Wesley children. Remus stands in front of me, Harry parked at his side. A few more people that you don’t know the names of are right here with them. You stand there in shock for a couple seconds before Regulus walks up and asks who's there. Nobody in this group knows he is alive, since you faked his death. He was a traitor to Voldemort and so he didn’t get killed. You planned an elaborate plan to fake his death. You watched how Remus and Sirius’s eyes widened in shock. Rain starts to pour down steadily. 

 “Come in before the wind picks up.” You usher the hoard of people into your large living room.They spread out amongst the room. Some murmuring, others staring. You locked the front door and walked into the living room.

 “Okay first things first, what's going on?” You ask slightly annoyed so many people showed up unannounced and you didn’t even know all of them.

 “That's what I want to know.” Sirius said, his tone seemed hurt and angry. He pointed at Regulus. “You’re supposed to be dead. Didn’t he who is not named kill you?” Remus nodded in agreement. The students that were in the room's eyes widened slightly. They must not have heard the story. 

 “No, we faked my death after I switched from the dark side.” Regulus sighed. You nodded in agreement. Remus’s face seemed skeptical but he went with it.

 “Now for my question, what's going on and why are you here?” You repeated again. Sirius sighed and Molly spoke up.

 “I remember hearing about how you worked on the dark side for a while. Well for your brother. Did you happen to keep journals or anything?” You nodded and walked over to a bookshelf in the corner of the room. You grabbed about three books and set them on the table in front of everyone.

 “James was the only one who read them.” You spoke and pulled a piece of paper out of the dust cover of one of the journals. You handed it to Harry. 

 “Your father wrote this to me before he and Lily died. I thought that if I ever got to see you again you would want it.” He nodded before speaking. “You knew my father?” You nodded.” More than anyone in this room.” Sirius looked like he was about to protest but Remus shot him a look.

 “Your father was my older brother. I actually helped choose your name.” I smiled and the boy looked pleased. People began to talk amongst themselves since this was a semi private conversation. You were pleased to see Sirius and Regulus talking to each other.

 “ If you were related to him, then why did they send him to go live with his muggle family?” A girl with sandy brown hair asked. 

 “Me and Regulus were being hunted by the dark lord. Since we betrayed him, I had killed him once but he was regenerated and gained more power. It was too dangerous for him to stay here.” The trio's eyes widened.” You killed him?” You nodded.

 “Before Harry came into the picture, everyone who killed him got a scar, mines on arm.” you lift my arm showing the dark mark that was there from when you worked undercover for the Order, the lighting bolt scar was larger than the one Harry had. Their eyes widened with shock, either from the size of the scar or the fact that you have a dark mark. The mark was faded and dull. There was no indentation from it and the surface of your arm was smooth other than the border of the scar. You felt their eyes trace over the scar.

 “You have a-” The red headed boy said. He didn’t even finish his sentence before everyone's eyes were on me once again. I nodded.

 “That's true, but I'm not on the dark side, I only have it to help Regulus  and order.

  About an hour went on with going back and forth on how to take down Voldemort. The front door slams open from Harper walking back into the house, a tall stocky man follows behind her. It was her boyfriend Theo. Everyone in the living room was silent. She walked into the kitchen and the two talked. 

 “Mom!? What happened to dinner? It’s not even cooked.” She yelled through the house. You and Regulus looked at eachother. She walked into the living room and her eyes went wide.

 “What the hell-” She didn’t finish her sentence before Theo walked up beside her. She made eye contact with the trio, whom you have now learned all the names of. Their eyes widened with shock. 

 “Theo honey you should head home.” He didn’t say anything but nodded, grabbing his jacket and walking out of the house. “Mom. Dad. What the hell are they doing here?” She questioned. Annoyinced riddled her words, sarcasm filled her voice. 

 “Reg, please handle things here.” You said motioning for Harper to follow you through the house and into a different room. She didn’t understand what was going on, it all ended with a screaming match and her storming out of the house. You make your way back to the living room knowing they all heard the argument that had just insured.

 “I think that's all for now, but we will be in touch.” Molly said. Sirius and Remus stayed behind to talk with you both.

 You all cooked dinner together like old times, nothing seemed to change except you and Regulus are supposed to be dead. Sirius went to prison and Remus is a professor at hogwarts.

 “You know I really thought I would never see you two again.” You spoke, Remus had finished setting the table.

 “How do you think we feel? I honestly thought my brother was stupid and died and you killed yourself because of it. Here to know that you have a daughter.” Sirius chuckled at himself. He was being his old jokester self. 

 “How did you do it? I mean how did you guys manage to hide for 16 years now?” Remus said, you knew he would be curious and want to know.

 “Well..” Regulus started looking at you to make sure it was okay. You nodded and let him continue. “ We got muggle jobs, she's an EMT at a hospital and I work as a doctor. We also stopped using magic as much as possible. Y/n would help heal if there was a nearby witch or wizard who needed the help, but she told them a fake name. Something that would check out.” Regulus said, taking a bite of his food. The two nodded their heads as they ate. 

 “That reminds me. Regulus, Jane told me that she won't be there Monday so you get her patiences.” Regulus nodded, while chewing his food.

 “So Harper… is she coming home?” Remus asked. You swallowed. You weren’t sure how to respond, since it was unpredictable.

 “Probably not for another couple hours. Or even a day. You never really know with her.” You explain, Harper was a wild child, a lot like you. You both didn’t get along because of how much she reminded you of yourself. She was probably at the Malfoy manor or Theo’s. You really don’t know.

“Does it happen often?” Remus asked. You nodded while eating.With that being said, the front door opens and closes, footsteps head up the stairs and her door slams shut. You sigh and get up and start towards the stairs.

 “Y/n? Why don’t I go talk to her, maybe it will be better.” Remus says he was always the most logical out of them. You nod and sit down again, as he makes his way to her room. After the talk the two had, they both make their way back down and she makes herself a plate of food. You all sit together and talk. After dinner you move to the living room, to hopefully explain more of what happened earlier.

 “So you're telling me I’m related to Harry Potter!” She yelled, her voice seemed to be filled with disgust and disappointment.”Yes..I know it is not ideal for you but I can’t change it.” Regulus says, Harper rolls her eyes and Sirius smacks her in the back of the head, Remus gives him a warning look.

 “No rolling your eyes, they have no control over this. And for you it should be a wish to be related to such a powerful wizard.” He scolds her,she looks like she's rolling her eyes internally. 

 “He’s a freak. He claims Voldemort is back.” She says, her voice unwary. The four of you shudder at the name. Regulus starts to look pissed off. She knows most of the story on what happened.

 “ Get out of my house young lady. You have no right talking like that.” Regulus yells sternly, it's not a normal thing for him to do. He is always the laid back parent, the one who never yells. She stomps out of the house, and you apologize for her behavior. Maybeing kicking her out wasn’t the best option but it's what happen.Once Sirius and Remus left, you and Regulus were left alone in the house. Choosing to spend your alone time reading. You wrapped his arms as you both read, a record by David Bowie playing softly in the background.

 “Y/n?” You hummed in response.

 “What note did you give Harry? I never really thought you would part with them.” He asks, he had ever seen the note that James had written to you when you were undercover, or when you were living in Scotland together, but he did hear about them.. 

 “I gave him the letter he wrote when he told me he proposed to Lilly, and the one that he told me Lily was pregnant. I wanted him to know a small piece of his father, without him knowing everything that went on.” You said, placing a bookmark in your book. He nodded and let the topic go, you continued to lay in his arms as he hummed to the record. Nothing but the feeling of content littered your bones. Knowing you gave the boy a little something.

#regulus black x reader #regulus arcturus black #regulus x reader #regulus black #remus lupin #maraders era #siruis black

[evesaintyves]

I just love the way you write Tonks, she's so much bolshy and dirty and crass, she feels like a real auror and an actual badass that people wouldn't want to mees with! I liked Tonks in books but I admit I was a bit bored by her 'cutesy sweetheart' personality..

thank you so much, that's such a kind thing to say! ❤️ i'm gonna ramble about this a bit if you don't mind!

obviously i extrapolate a lot, but i think there are seeds of that bolshiness etc in canon. from her very first scene we see Tonks kind of talking shit about Harry's house (and her parents!) and giving her mentor, a pretty intimidating dude, guff in front of everyone. she stands up to Remus when he deadnames her (though i agree with the common fanon interpretation that they're flirting a bit in that exchange). she's introduced as a character who speaks her mind and doesn't take any shit*. all of that is on a mission and in front of a kid, so i imagine she's probably even a little more outspoken under other circumstances. it's also clear to me that she's got to be strong-willed, a little singleminded, incredibly talented, and probably a little arrogant to make it as an auror so young: she talks about how difficult it is to qualify and not many do. she's also canonically kind of reactionary and impulsive - i mean, that's how she dies.

some of my characterization of tonks is just personal - so much of her plotline is pretty sad, and her personality disappears entirely toward the end as she becomes a fulcrum for lupin's character arc. and her death, honestly, is kind of stupid. so i feel this urge to give her some justice and a little bit of a fuller personhood in the way i write her.

to me, tonks is (on top of being obviously interpretable as queer) clearly punk/alternative coded, withe the hair and the way she speaks to her elders and her sense of humor. i'm old and i was a tween/young teen in the mid/late nineties when tonks would have been around, and i remember how discovering riot grrl and queer punk bands of that era completely changed the way i thought about myself and the standards i was being held to and just the possibilities for what girls could do and how they could exist in the world and in their own bodies. being gross and crude, rejecting and subverting and playing with the power of the male gaze, talking openly about fucking and bleeding and being gay and being angry: it all seemed like a superpower to me.

tonks is clearly, from the start, in a state of experimentation with her own identity - the way she changes her hair from violet to pink in front of harry - and she's uniquely positioned as a metamorphmagus to create herself from scratch whenever she likes. it reminds me so much of being a kid and discovering that there were all of these new possibilities for who i could be, if i could be brave enough to try them. and we know that Tonks is brave 😉. so like, why not write a Tonks who is liberated, doesn't give a fuck, insists that the world make room for her? i think the contrast with people-pleaser overthinker self-hater lupin is really irresistible, too.

my vision of tonks is as a person i would have looked up to as a kid at that time, but who is still from her pov very much figuring her shit out and trying to construct a self that gives her peace and fulfillment. she dies in that state of flux - having also just undergone the enormous identity-changes of marriage and motherhood. she's fascinating! i insist on it!

so thank you again, such a sweet ask!

* i bet she put up with a ton of bullshit trying to be in a relationship with lupin tho smh girl u can do better!!! we all been there though

#tonks #remadora #hp meta

[cressthebest]

Crimson Rivers thoughts pt. 15

chapter 26: (check tags for triggers)

1. james’ stab wound will heal, but of course he’s gonna have to use a cane for the rest of his life. my poor darling. but also! CHARACTERS WITH DISABILITIES THAT WONT BE ERASED!!! HELL YEAH!

2. this nurse is pissing me off. sirius is asking if james and reg are gonna be okay, and all she can talk about it appearances and scars. not if they’ll be okay

3. sirius and reg are reunited. thank god. this is what the world needs

4. “"I love you. You're my brother; of course I love you. Always have, always will, and nothing—absolutely nothing in this world could ever change that, do you hear me? You're enough for me, and I love you. Never, never fucking doubt that."” AHHHHHHHHHHHHH reg needed to hear that so bad, and james needed to say it so bad

5. 😧😟 reg is vomitting blood. yikes. wow. that’s yikes. it’s not even HIS BLOOD that he’s vomiting. and i wanna know who’s blood filled that river. i want to know who was killed to make blood for that river

6. “”It's fine. I didn't even like this shirt.” (Sirius really liked this shirt.)” 😭😭

7. 😊 siblings! sirius wipes reg’s face, and reg threatens to vomit on him again

8. reg questioning if he actually made it out. that breaks both mine and sirius’ heart. “"I—I thought it made sense, because why would I have scars if I was dead?””

9. reg breaking down and sobbing to his brother. wow. i- wow

10. gosh, remus and sirius are already like a married couple. i love them

11. regulus would just wake up and ask for james. that hurts. in no way was my experience any where near as bad, but i know it must suck to wake up, calling for someone, and them not to be there. when i woke up from wisdom tooth surgery, i called out for my mom many times, and the nurses jsut told me to be quiet, and i can’t see her. i was so distressed that i cried. my pain is not anywhere like james or reg’s but i know that it sucks.

12. sobbing. reg needs to shower, but doesn’t want to get in the water. he’s scared of the water. like wow

13. god, james wakes up and starts fighting people. he never should have had to go through that.

14. james is begging to see regulus, and regulus begged to NOT see james. idk how zar could have hurt me any more, but here we are

15. james and sirius have matching scars! that’s horrific! but! they’re matching!

16. sirius’ words before james went into the arena. we get to know them. and it’s both healing to know the memory, but also hurts like a motherfucking truck

17. sirius asking for remus to kiss him! consent!

18. shit. remus realized he loved sirius. like. loved him. wolfstar better be granted happiness in this universe

19. authors end note: “you think regulus is unhinged? sirius is so, so much worse 😳”

chapter 27:

1. god, regulus needs to take a shower. he must STINK. but also, i do not blame him for not wanting to

2. i appreciate remus’ honestly. he will not dance around the point with reg, and honestly, that’s what he needs

3. oh my god. is remus gonna get reg to take a bath? honestly, if anyone could do it, it would be remus. nobody else could do it

4. remus sharing the petty hallow drama 😭😭

5. james and sirius friendship is all i need in this life

6. oh wow. sirius is hurt that james never told him about his crush on regulus. not that james likes regulus. i love when fics do that instead of sirius being angry

7. i love that it’s no issue for james and sirius to share a bed. they need comfort. they share. that’s that.

8. sirius not letting james have a drink cause he knows it’s a slippery slope >>>>>>

9. ✨remus lupin✨

10. 😧 reg but sirius as a reflex from the arena. and immediately apologized. he’s never hit sirius before. and wow. that-

11. sirius is admitting something he never even told james. that he accidentally hit effie. and 😧😧😧

12. AWWWW REMUS CALLED JAMES SWEETHEART

13. honorable mention for all pandora did in this chapter. she is a lifesaver, she is a queen, she is a goddess, and she deserves so much

#marauders #regulus black #james potter #fanfic #jegulus #sirius black #tw vomit #vomiting #cw vomit #tw blood #remus lupin #wolfstar #pandora rosier #pandora lovegood #crimson rivers

[floralembarrassment]

Reading Glasses (1/1) (jegulus)

“This child speaks 3 languages, and can do a lot of other things you wouldn’t even be able to dream about, and you are trying to tell me that he can’t read?” Regulus was angry. Harry had a hard enough time at this school with the teachers. Regulus understands that he shouldn’t be left out when they do crafts for mother’s day, but really the teacher couldn’t just get him to make a card for his grandmama? He was seething, and all the small things that made Harry’s life harder were just fuelling his fire at the moment. James put a steadying hand on Regulus’ shoulder.

The teacher, a young man, whom Harry seemed to like quite a bit honestly, attempted to speak in a calming tone (which only infuriated Regulus more); “Listen Mr. Black, I don’t doubt that Harry is a talented boy, he does have quite the active imagination, but he cannot read anything off the board when he is called upon, it takes him a lot longer to complete his class work compared to the other children, and when we did a reading test this afternoon he barely got through two pages.”

“So what does this mean?” James tried, always solutions-focused, and wanting to try to divert the shouting from Regulus that James could feel bubbling under his skin. Regulus took a deep breath, crossed his arms, and looked around the classroom. He spotted his son, playing with some stuffed animals making them fly through the air. He could hear him softly singing in welsh, a song Remus had taught him many moons ago.

“Well it could mean that-,” the teacher said running a shaky head through his hair, and then placing his hands on his hips. Regulus turned his head back, arching an eyebrow and surveying the teacher while he continued. “He may need a private tutor, and if he cannot get caught up we would recommend he repeat the year,” which had steam flying out of Regulus’ ears and even James looking unimpressed.

“Right,” James said after a long breath. He squeezed Regulus’ shoulder, who only shook his head in confusion, “but he has no issues like this at home? We read together every night,” Regulus pointed out. "And why is it nearly the end of the year that you are pointing this out?" James didn't think Regulus' eyebrows could arch any higher. The teacher looked confused and James knew this conversation wasn't going to get any better.

“Harry,” James called across the room. Harry hadn’t really noticed them until this point, having been pretty preoccupied playing, but when he heard his name he turned his head and searched about the classroom. He got up and ran toward them, but stumbled into the desks and nearly tripped over a pile of blocks before falling into Regulus’ legs. “Papa! Dad!” He called, a beaming smile on his face.

“Salut mon amour,” Regulus said wrapping one arm around him and placing his free hand on his hair. He held him gently, as they continued to speak. “You know actually, he does stumble around like you do James… I hadn’t noticed.”

“I don’t stumbl-“ he cut himself off, “oh wait, you mean like when I don’t-“

“Have your glasses on? Yes.” Regulus said, and then turned pointedly to the teacher. “When you ask him to read are any of the texts close to him?” Regulus tone was always a bit sharp.

“Uhh… I guess not actually, no.” The teacher mumbled.

“So really my son could just need glasses?” Regulus offered. James laughed a bit. Regulus did not give the teacher any opportunity to say anything else, “Yes, well I’ll take him to the eye doctor first before we talk about repeating the year. Thank you for calling us in,” Regulus said.

James crouched down, eye level with Harry: “Ready son?”

“Are uncle moony and pads still coming for dinner? They said Thursday and it’s Thursday,” Harry asked. All the words a bit slurred and rushed in that sweet 4 year old way. “Oui, mon beau,” Regulus said, as James picked Harry up to put him on his shoulders. The family turned and started to leave.

“À demain Mr. Martin.” Harry called out, leaving the teacher a bit shocked at his own forgetfulness about the possibility of glasses.

#jegulus #starchaser #marauders #james x regulus #james potter #regulus black #harry potter #fanfic #marauders era #regulus arcturus black #james fleamont potter #lgbtq+ #wolfstar #sunseeker #jegulus raising harry #french regulus

[siriuslygay1981]

Angry, possessive Barty who watches Remus and Sirius talking, he thinks about how Remus used to like Sirius and he's heated immediately. He's working himself up watching how Sirius beats his eyelashes (he's just blinking) he's grinding his teeth and glaring at the two.

Barty ends up waiting till Sirius leaves before coming up behind and grabbing remus' waist

Into his neck he whispers SMTHN possessive (I'll kill him if he touches you, kill you if you let him)

Remus is so very fond, and also annoyed (shut up you possessive bastard and let's go.) cuz he's turned on fuck u

He just turns around and kisses Barty and Barty bites him and he pulls back with blood dripping down both their lips and they make out against the wall and then Barty drags them upstairs and bam fuckin all over Sirius' bed as a big fuck you.

They tumble a bit but honestly Remus is so turned on he gives control almost immediately, he still makes Barty work for it but he planned on bottoming as soon as Barty whispered in his ear.

Barty is making Remus yell and be loud and saying all types of possessive crap while he teases TF out of him.

"He can't get you like this"

"I make you feel so good, bet he couldn't even get you as wet as I do"

"Fucking slut, letting him give you those fuck me eyes"

"He couldn't make you beg like I do, he wouldn't fuck you how you like"

"I should fuck you in front of him, show him the only person that can fuck you right"

"Maybe that's what you want-too fucking bad though. No one gets to see you when you're being my little whore"

"No one gets to have you like this Remus, I'll fucking kill anyone who tries"

And then he bites TF out of Remus, he's bruised for weeks, when they first finish there's like a lot of blood from biting ofc so Barty cleans it up while Remus smokes. Remus gives a 'nonchalant' I don't like Sirius that way anymore when Barty has his back to him . They both pretend not to notice when Barty loses the tension in his shoulders.

Sirius is clueless the whole time, babe is happily eye fucking his own bf. (James)

Remus buys Sirius new sheets btw, don't worry

#wolfkiller #moonkiller #darkmoon #darkwolf #bambielle? #idk how to spell #prongsfoot mentioned #marauders era #marauders fandom #harry potter marauders #dead gay wizards from the 70s #hp marauders #remus john lupin #remus j lupin #remus lupin #barty jr #bartemius crouch junior #barty crouch junior #barty crouch jr #barty crouch jr x remus john lupin #remusx barty #barty x remus #the marauders era #marauder era #rarepair #siriuslygay1981 #remus lupinxbarty crouch jr #incorrect marauders era #the marauders #dead gay wizards

[fruitcoops]

Coops 26?

#26: ...as an apology

TW past argument

"I'm sorry."

It would have been endearing if Sirius wasn't so fucking annoyed.

Remus' lip dimpled as he gnawed at the inside; he picked at a loose thread on his jacket and Sirius watched it unravel in the tiniest increments. "I'm--yeah, I'm really sorry."

"Okay," Sirius said blandly. He was being a dick, but...honestly? He kind of deserved to be.

The justification didn't make the pitch of Remus' brows any easier to ignore. "I know you don't like it when I avoid telling you things." His voice was careful and measured. "I know that, and I'm working on it."

"It wasn't avoidance, Remus, you lied."

Remus winced. "Yeah."

"Over something I specifically asked your opinion on so we could have fun. Together. As a couple."

He leaned against the countertop and nodded. It was as if Sirius had asked him to walk over a pit of hot coals with that look on his face.

"So--"

"I know it upsets you and I know I did it anyway, and I'm sorry," Remus said on a long breath. His throat bobbed. He stood straight, hands flexing at his sides. Finally, he managed to look Sirius in the face, no matter how waxen his skin was. "I won't do that anymore. Not--not to you. And I'm gonna try to fix it with other people."

The knot in Sirius' left lung loosened. "I ask your thoughts because I like to know them, Remus. Not because I want to hear whatever you think is the right answer."

Remus nodded again; his gaze flitted down to the floor and stayed there, leaving the kitchen silent. The pandering dug into his skin and left angry marks behind. The incessant desire of everyone around him to just please, to make him happy so that they could feel better about themselves. Sirius hated the sick feeling that oozed through his veins at the first sign of bootlicking. His parents used to love people who made themselves small as a gift.

Remus had been different from the start, and it really pissed Sirius off to see him shrink all the things Sirius adored about him into some palatable little box. He didn't like Remus because he was agreeable. He liked Remus because nobody else had had the balls to tell him just where to shove his attitude on rougher days.

"Hey." Sirius tried to keep it gentler than before. Remus glanced up, and he opened his arm in a silent invitation. He shuffled over in socked feet; his hands fumbled before slipping into his pockets. The tension in his neck eased up when Sirius tucked an arm around him and kissed the top of his head, then felt the ghost of Remus' lips on his collarbone in response. "You're a lion, aren't you? Roar for me next time."

#sirius black #remus lupin #coops #sweater weather #vaincre #lumosinlove #my fic #fanfic #short fic #hurt/ comfort #angst #argument #forgiveness #kiss prompts

[anunfortunatekinlist]

Some Disabled Remus Drabble

honestly this is me adding my two cents in on disabled remus writing as someone who uses a mobility aid and needed a good rant tbh. but this is almost from my perspective so imma be protective over this like a mother.

Remus was apprehensive at first, well of course, he would willing be drawing attention to himself, but as the days draw longer and more painful, and after Sirius constant nagging, he caves and finally uses his cane more often.

It honestly feels ridiculous at first, like he is faking a problem, showing off almost, cause he can walk on his own most days, “Why the fuck do I need this shitty thing anyway”, he would constantly mutter. In reality, the cane wasn’t shitty, or displeasing to the eye at all, it was almost ornate, intricate wooden carvings etched into a lovely oak stick, handle carved into a shape to relieve pressure off of us ever aching wrists. The only thing he could complain about was the attention.

Some people’s curiosity was out of kindness, as the cane was proof of Remus’s incapability, but it would get annoying to be asked “How he was?” or “What happened?”, about 8 times at breakfast whilst he was trying to eat some toast. It was a show of his fragility, how he wasn’t fully working, almost not human, something people needed to dodge, treat with caution. Remus couldn’t just tell them all to fuck off, as Sirius eloquently suggested, as it felt rude, even though their “concern”, was a mask for a fiendish need for more gossip.

The stares were worse though, as people only saw older people with canes, not a lanky 17 year old, known for causing pranks and having above average spell work, it didn’t make sense. It was like they were too stunned to speak, to curious to look away, and too polite to laugh, the stares almost made him give up entirely on the idea, that he could power through the agony to just be normal again, not like Sirius wouldn’t catch him if fell anyway.

Sirius would be almost angry at this idea, didn’t see the point in him hurting himself to please others eyes, “I’ll fucking punch anyone who says anything.”, he would promise, and Remus knew he intended to keep that promise, and that motivated him slightly, his boyfriend, and his mates, would always protect him front the rumour, however outlandish, except the occasion, “I heard he was scratched by a werewolf in the Forbidden Forest.” mutters, as it never failed to make them laugh at the accuracy and the idiocracy of the gossip. The safety of the laugh with his friends made him almost feel normal, and not a freak of natural, or a fragile package.

And all Remus really wanted was to feel normal and not in pain.

#remus lupin is disabled #this is like my own person rant #so leave it be #i wrote this sad and feeling miserable about my pain #marauders era #sirius black #james potter #remus john lupin #wolfstar #peter pettigrew #remus lupin #disability #walking stick #harry potter #kinda fluff #fluffy in like a good way and a bad way #most of this drabble is based on my personal experience #character breakdown

[robynlilyblack]

That doesn’t leave us many options

Sirius Black x fem! shy! reader

Summary: Sirius gets an unexpected visitor whose in need of a place to stay

Warnings: swearing, mentions of food, eating and sex, acquaintances (but more mutual pining for afar) to lovers, sirius being a total sweetheart

A/n: 2.7k words, it's a little bit different to the usual enemies to lovers one bed trope and is more friends to lovers, I hope you like it x

Navigation | Sirius Black Masterlist

You took a deep breath before lifting your hand to knock, but your knuckles barely graze the wood, resolve faltering once more. You had to thank merlin that his flat didn’t have a peep hole, only thing that could make this situation worse was the embarrassment of knowing he saw you standing outside his door for what was quickly becoming a shameful amount of time

It shouldn’t have been this scary, the goosebumps on your arms and legs half from the cold air and half from the reason you came here in the first place. If it had been any other marauder you would have been nervous sure but not near crippled at the door. But this was no normal marauder this was Sirius, he boy that rendered you, an already shy, near mute girl just that completely

You had liked him for a while, that school girl crush you held grew post-hogwarts when yours and Marlene's flat just so happened to be across the street from his, James' and Remus'. The narrow street and similar height of your windows made things a little difficult…little being an understatement considering the amount of bruises you had now sustained via falling and/or launching yourself away from the window when you saw him

“You got this” you whisper to yourself, bouncing on the balls of your feet in order to psych yourself up

One shaky breath later you knocked, letting out a small yip at how loud the first thump was before letting the next two be rather pitiful as if that would make up for it

Silence

You honestly didn’t know if you wanted him to answer, but as you heard some weird creak from down the hall you hoped he would, and soon at that. Marlene was staying with Dorcas tonight as it was their anniversary and Dorcas' flat was closer to the restaurant, while James and Remus were off on a camping trip.

Why exactly? Because Lily and Marlene bet James he could never camp like a muggle for an entire weekend. And as for why Remus was accompanying him? Well, someone needed to vouch James didn’t cheat and actually did it, ergo leaving Remus with the job as Sirius wasn’t trustworthy enough not to lie or find a work around on his friends behalf

You knock again, flinching at the grumpy ‘I’m coming’ before a small crash and swear. Shaking your arm you prepared for him to open the door, not knowing whether to cringe or brace yourself for the one extraordinarily upset puppy you just woke up

“What!” he snaps as quickly as the door opens, breathing heavy and a groggy look about him

His eyes are still half shut when he hears your little squeak, flying open to see you standing in front of him looking sheepish

“Y/n?” his face softens immediately, instead of anger concern now paints his rather chiselled features…

...Not the time y/n...

Out of all the people to show up at his door Sirius never would have expected you, yet at the same time he always hoped you would. It wasn’t that you never came over on your own but more you came to see or talk to anyone but him. It hurt, although it was more of a dull ache now, it had been like this since hogwarts, you and he just never spoke, no matter how much he wished you would

Instead he let himself admire you for afar, that statement made true as he bribed Remus for the front bedroom so he could face yours. He was never a creep, but he did workout by the window, read and do mundane things there just so he may glance up to see you reading, laughing with marlene, maybe dancing around as you cooked…and once falling which was equally concerning and funny to him

“Hi” you give him a shy smile that looks more like a wince, still nervous he’s angry you woke him

His heart ached that he shouted earlier, even if he didn’t know it was you he still felt bad, like the way you step on an animal's tail and can’t begin to explain how sorry you are. Sirius never really felt guilt during his worst pranks, the willow incident excluded of course, so this feeling was foreign, yet it was how he knew you were special, he didn’t just care for anybody

“Hi…” he says quite roughly so he coughs in attempt to remove the scruffiness “Hi” another cough “Hi…fuck it” he lets out a breathy laugh embracing the scruff, even more at your little giggle “What can I do for you darlin?” he wonders, it was late not quite midnight but still late, anything could have happened, you needed him and he was more than here to help

“Well…” your words lose you, although from Sirius’ rough voice, somehow perfect bed head curls and use of the pet name you just adored, you were sure those words where running off to the hills and never to return

“Well?” he extends the syllables softly, not wanting to pressure or scare you away

You chew on your bottom lip, breathing slowly in and out your nose to compose yourself and try to remember the little speech you had planned

“Marlene is out, she’s staying with dorcas and…” you say shaky, nerves overcoming you as this would be the longest conversation you had ever semi held alone with him

He mistakes your nerves for fear though “What happened? Someone try to get in? Something break? On fire? Trust me I’ve dealt with it all…mostly being Prongs as he has a nasty habit of leaving the door unlocked…” he speaks quickly, soon off on his own little ramble, hands subconsciously finding the sides of your upper arms 

“Sirius?” your voice is timid and quiet but it’s enough for him to stop

“Sorry” he shake his head and self out of it “Sorry” he repeats, removing his hands and letting out a edgy chuckle as he scratches the back of his neck “So Marls is at Dorcas'…” he prompts trying his best to stop the blush creeping up his cheeks

Your eyes widen nodding as you begin explaining again “Marlene watched a movie without me last week…” you aren’t looking at him more just in his general area, eyes defocusing so you could concentrate on talking hence you don’t clock his surprise amusement at your first statement “...you see we rented it together but she watched in retaliation to me eating her…sorry” you cut your ramble short much to the boys dismay

“Don’t be, continue” he gives you a sweet smile

You return it bashfully 

“I decided to watch it myself as we need to give it back in a few days but she didn’t tell me it was a horror movie. So now every shadow I see or noise I hear I’m terrified it’s a little…creepy…” you bring your hands to the bottom of your face, wiggling your fingers “...thing coming to get me” you lower your hands, a little embarrassed but his fond smile makes you less afraid to ask “Can I stay here tonight?”

“Yeah” he says a little quickly and loudly causing you to jump “Sorry” he does it again before finally lowering his tone “Sorry. Still a little high from thinking I needed to kick a robbers arse” he plays it off, it was true in a way but he didn’t want to seem way too keen about having you under his roof

“I’m still a little high too…I sort of threw the remote control at a vase and smashed it thinking it was one of those things” you confess as he motions for you to enter and closes the door behind

He walks deeper into the apartment with you closely in tow “No shame in that. Me and Prongs made a fort the first time his parents left us alone, gathered every pillow and cover in the…fuck” he stops causing you to walk into the back of him

“Ow” you whisper as he turns around cringing “What's wrong?” you tilt your head

He scrunches his face “Moons and Prongs’ beds don’t have mattresses” he says almost like an appology

“Oh” you pout “What happened to them?” a small smile gracing your face as if you know the marauders you’ll know it’s something funny

“You can’t tell anyone” 

You hold up your pinky watching as he eyes it. You were about to explain what it was when he grins, wrapping his own around yours and giving it a squeeze before letting go

“Prongs and Moony bought a muggle tent for the bet, but Red and Marls never specified what size nor that the items inside couldn’t be charmed” he smirks and you listen to him entranced “They shrunk down their mattresses and bought an 8 person tent, took all of the covers and everything as Prongs thought a sleeping bag was uncivilised and Moony…well Moons’ back would break if he had to sleep on the ground like that” he chuckles

“That's really smart” you commend them, knowing pretty quickly it was Sirius’ idea by the way his happy grin turns prideful

“Thank you” he bobs his head, heart fluttering that his crush found him smart “Actually there is a spare mattress, we got it after the…” his words slow down “...you don’t wanna know” he shakes his head

You nod a little wary, following him into his bedroom and watching him look for the spare. You had never been inside his room, Remus’ loads since you, Lily and he would host your secret book club there, and even James’ once or twice. It was nice, smelt just like him, posters on the walls, clothes scattered about here and there but nothing too untidy

“Do you have a spare quilt too?” you ask causing him to stop raking and turn to you

“Yes” he nods but something flashes behind his eyes

“Yes?”

“Yes?…” his repetition is less certain “...No?” 

“No?”

He gives you a look somewhere between sad, embarrassed and weirdly proud “We used them to make a fort in the study so me and prongs could nap in our forms. They’ll be covered in hair…and probably drool…Prongs' drool’” he says firmly but the blush on his face tells you it’s not just prongs and you can’t help but feel your lips tug upwards at the image

You face then drops to a look of thought but before you could speak he does

“You can have my bed I’ll sleep in the little fort as Padfoot” he offers, ensuring your comfort came first

You start nodding but as he goes to leave you stop him “Wait…” you don’t finish your thought though

There were two perfectly good beds in your flat, you could offer them but a selfish little part of you wanted the idea that just sprung to mind “You once said that sleeping like that for more than two hours... fucks your back” you quote him on the last bit

Sirius’ face goes through a mixture of positive emotions that you remembered that tiny group conversation from well over a month ago as well as the fact you swear so sweetly it's almost not even one at this point

“That doesn’t leave us many options” his eyes flick to his bed then to you, as do your own, both thinking the same thing

“It’s a decent size” you note rather awkwardly

He chuckles “It is a decent size, average” he gestures to the air as awkwardly as you do before meeting your eyes “Little bigger than average actually” he says raises his eyebrows, underlying tone beneath h words

You cock your head in confusion before you get it, mouth like a fish before you press your lips together, trying to suppress your smile, cheek rising.

Sirius’ felt quite proud at that, especally as you were quite clearly flustered yet not looking uncomfortable, if anything your shoulders relaxed

Neither of you say anything else, instead moving to get into the bed, both fixing your pillows before you notice one final detail

“Single quilt?” you lift up the end Sirius places over you

He smiles coyly “Fake answer or real answer” he lets you choose, usually he would spout the fake one but you were you, he didn’t mind you knowing the truth

“Fake first” you ask and he obliges

“Cheaper and they only had a single at the shop” he says simply as you both shift under the cover, a healthy distance between your shoulders as you stare at the ceiling

“And the real one” you look over at him

He glances at you then keeps his eyes fixed to the ceiling, looking embarrassed as his answer is by any definition sadly sweet “A single encourages cuddling, something I really want but will never ask for cause I’m…I’m too scared” he admits, not daring to look at you to see your reaction, you probably think he’s a…wait

He feels you lift his arm, head snapping down to watch you slide in next to him, arm coming around his torso as your head settles above in the small space between his upper arm and chest

“Is this okay?” you check, even though you're sure his previous answer was an invitation...or at least you hoped it was

He doesn’t answer, just wraps his arms around you, tugging you impossibly closer and igniting some giggles from you. He eventually lets up his tight grip, your head on his chest with his chin brushing against your hair

“Why have we never really spoken to one another?” he whispers, the sorrow evident in his voice

Your head shifts upwards to you can see him, looking down at you with characteristic puppy eyes and you remain silent for a moment, thinking your reply through

“I’m quite shy…” you start “...back at Hogwarts you merely looking at me made me so…so flustered” you confess, eyes flicking away from him, missing how his own light up “I couldn’t even make a sound. Now, although I’ve gotten better I guess I supposed you wouldn’t be interested…in talking to me” you add in after a small break in order to save yourself from rejection

He gently rocks you closer and you return your eyes to his “I was very interested…in talking to you” he plays the same trick

“Really?”

“Really”

“Me?” you bring your hand up to point and he could've died right there at how cute you looked, eyes wide filled with hope, disbelief and everything he'd ever craved

“You” slides his arm from your waist, taking your hand and kissing the palm, lingering there as his eyes say fixated on you, and that was the moment you died and gone to the sweet hereafter

“Are you free tomorrow?” he asks, letting your hands intertwine before bringing them to his heart

You nod, heart thumping and you’re sure he can feel it as his is doing something similar

“Want to go on a date with me?” you nod again, a huge smile on your face “Sure? You don’t seem too eager” he teases, confidence returning now he knows you want him the same way

“Very sure” you can’t stop your smile from getting wider, nor your faces moving that little bit closer as you’re caught up in the excitement

He chuckles “We could make a day of it if you want? I have the bike” he suggests 

“What are you thinking?” you ask, eyes sparking as your faces continue to move closer

“Maybe to the peak district or the dales where some of those books you love are set? Maybe bring a picnic with us. With the bike we can get there in like a couple hours never any traffic up there” he jokes, cheeks going a little red as he realises how he just gushed, but the embaressement fade as your nose brushes over his  

“How long have you been…umm” you whisper, unable to finish as you didn’t want to assume

“A lot longer than I’d care to admit at present”

You both giggle

“You aren’t what I imagined'' you say when the laughter dies down and his head tilts ever so slightly “You know when you imagine someone in your head, and you tell yourself there is no way they would really be this sweet, especially not to me?” you think out loud

“More than anything” he replies, eyes meeting your own and occasionally your lips

“You more than exceeded my wildest dreams” you tell him, adoring how his eyes shine like the star he’s name after

“Ditto darlin’” he winks and chew on your lip, holding your smile as you watch his eyes drift down to it, lingering before the come back up “You should know that I’m putty in your hands…I’d do whatever you asked of me, and not even within reason I'd really do anything” he laughs as do you

“Anything?” 

“Anything” he nudges his nose with yours

“Kiss me”

Thank you for reading 💛

#sirius and reader #sirius black and reader #sirius x reader #sirius black #sirius black and you #sirius x y/n #sirius black x reader #sirius black and y/n #sirius black x y/n #sirius black x you #sirius and you #sirius and y/n #sirius x you #marauders #marauders era #robynsrequests

[marauders-peace]

Star point of view

Summary : After the holidays Sirius is worried about his best friend, but also about Sunny, which doesn't talk to Moony anymore. So he confronts Remus about what happened and is shocked about what he hears.

Warnings: Remus being an idiot but we love him, intense emotions, dramatic sryy, of course Angst

After I wrote the last part, I wanted to do something different with this series and I hope you enjoy :'))

Tell me please if you like to see different perspectives!

Masterlist part 1 part 2 part 3 part 5 part 6

Sirius pov

I was friends with remus since we went to first year. And yet I only got to know him through James.

Moony was always friends with little Sunny before we were a group and that's how we met them too. I love them both.

They are my family.

But they are so terribly stupid.

Sunny has always taken care of Moony. I used to think that was because they knew each other for so long and they wanted to help him because they were friends.

It wasn't until much later that I saw the tender look in their eyes when they visited him in the hospital wing. I don't blame Moony for not noticing. I mean, even I didn't see it until much too late.

But I do blame him for never talking to them about his feelings. He always loved sunny.

Why didn't he say anything?

I have been asking myself this question for years and only a few days ago I found the answer. When we were in the café.

He is afraid, not them. He's afraid that they don't love him the way he loves them. And that's so idiotic, because they really have always loved him. But he kind of blew it. Because in the meantime, I'm not sure if they still love him....

When we stood on the platform in the station, the train was not yet visible. This year I came here with James.

Because I was now a Potter.

I was so glad to be out of this house that I didn't realize until later how terrible Moony felt. He had withdrawn more and more since sunny gave him the cold shoulder.

And honestly? I couldn't blame him. But what I did hold against him was that he didn't tell us anything.

What had happened to Sunny?

It didn't happen overnight, especially with the love friendship they had. I was confused and angry.

Because they were both acting so stupid. And don't get me wrong, that whole thing is their business. I just don't want to see them so exhausted and hurt.

In the end, all of this was preventable if they would just be honest with each other.

When Remus met us, he looked terrible. He had huge bags under his eyes and looked like he was going to fall over at any moment.

"Hey." was all he needed to get out.

"You look terrible," I said a little too honestly.

At that, he looked at me irritably.

"Thanks, pads, that's what I really wanted to hear. I didn't even know that!"

James sighed and looked at him with a furrowed brow.

"Remus you should talk to them sometime. This can't go on."

Remus shook his head expressionlessly.

"They're avoiding me like I'm the worst person in the world. Believe me they don't want to talk to me, I learned that this summer."

He laughed bitterly.

"Moony what happened? Why are they avoiding you like this?" I finally voiced the thoughts that were solidifying in my mind.

He hesitated before answering. Then he looked away into the crowd and finally answered.

"I fucked up. So really."

At that, James laughed.

"We already knew that. The question is how?"

"I was stupid and insecure. I let it guide me-" but then he stopped. It looked like he saw something specific in the crowd. Or someone in particular.

"What's wrong?" I asked, following his gaze.

But then I saw a certain sun, which was staring ahead, as if they were trying to block out our moon.

How could someone have such a crush on someone else? No, it was more than crushes, I had learned that this summer.

"Talk to them. It's now or never. They can't run away here. If you want an explanation, you have to confront them, too." I advised him.

"Okay." he just said and walked towards them with heavy steps.

The chaos that followed I don't think I need to explain….

~~~

"YOU. HAVE. WHAT." I said stunned as he walked into our cabin.

He winced and sat down dejectedly at the window.

"i don't know what was wrong with me…. I suddenly had this urge to have them as close as possible and then I kissed them on the forehead - it just kind of happened!" he said quickly and without stopping.

I was just about to continue scolding him, when James spoke.

"What happened, moony? Explain it to us, please. "

And so he steered our conversation in that previous direction.

I have never been so upset about Moony in my life. Otherwise, it's always the other way around.

"So let me sum this up…. You always told them that you didn't know how you felt when they told you that they loved you, but then you treated them like everything was the same and now because they don't talk to you anymore you kissed them in front of everybody. Remus that's fucked up."

He said nothing and just looked out the window. He didn't even defend himself and my anger decreased.

I fucking felt sorry for him. I didn't know what he was supposed to do either.

James shook his head.

"Moony, you know you love them. You proved it again a few minutes ago. Then why don't you tell them?"

Suddenly I remembered Sunny's violent reaction to my insinuation that Remus loved them. Oh man he had really fucked up.

But when I saw remus' eyes in the reflection, I saw his tears. Remus was crying. Remus-I-never-show-anyone-what's-going-on-with-me-Lupin was crying.

I didn't say anything more, instead I just put a hand on his shoulder to calm him down.

James and I exchanged worried glances. I knew we were thinking the same thing.

What the hell is going to have to happen to bring the two of them back together?

And the moon cried bitter and burning tears of love and sorrow at the same time as the sun, while the star just watched helplessly.

Taglist : @juleshadalittlelamb @fluffybunnyu @tendous-pretty-hair @helloitsmeeeeeee @valencia-rou

#marauders era #marauders #remus lupin #dead gay wizards #harry potter #remus lupin x reader #remus lupin angst #remus lupin x you #Spotify #sirius black