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cinnamonest · 3 years

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Diluc Ragnvindr - Yandere Profile

Yall are so kind and I am so undeserving hhhhh

If you stand idly by that flower girl in Mondstadt her idle line is something like "All I can think about is Diluc" And honestly same

This man exudes bde I'm sorry I just... It is a known FACT that Diluc is packing and I refuse to believe otherwise, lord have mercy I'm bout to SIMP

tws: yandere, mentions of violence

tws (below cut): noncon, kinda misogynistic in 1 part

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What are they generally like? Lucid, aware? Obsessive? How do they behave?

Acutely aware, and in the beginning, frustrated with his own self. He's very much a loner type of guy, and he likes it that way -- in his mind, people are distractions.

He doesn't talk to you too much, but you'll slowly and subtly notice his presence with increasing frequency. He hovers. Silent, but intimidating. He's always there, in the background. Somehow, everywhere you go, you can spot him somewhere if you try, and even if you don't see him, you know someone is watching you, from the skin crawling feeling of eyes on you. It will never go away, and it's easily enough to drive you to paranoia.

In reality, he'd like to talk, really, but he doesn't know how. For the first time in his life, he actually has the urge to speak with someone, not for his own desire to speak so much as speak with you- to learn about you, to hear your voice. But the poor thing has no idea what to say. He's used to just going about his day and only speaking to others when they need something from him.

When he does talk to you, he finds himself even enjoying the silliest and most trivial of things you say. Normally he hates small talk, and he's normally annoyed by anything outside of very serious matters, but even if you're raving about something he has no interest in, he's happy to listen just because it's you.

He's fairly aware, too. Not a delusional for the most part, and he's honestly a bit afraid of rejection - he knows he's not the most pleasant or charming person to be around, and certainly not the best conversationalist. He tries to make up for it in thinking that his money, status, and protective ability can be something he can use to draw you in, so he makes sure to subtly and frequently remind you of those things.

How likely are they to kidnap their darling? How quickly will they do so?

Eventually, it's inevitable. It will happen, it's just a matter of time. His reasoning is less about your fragility and safety, even if he pretends it is, and more of a selfish thing. He doesn't want to be, and he'll certainly feel guilty for it, but he's a silently jealous person. Hearing you talk to others, seeing you smile at others, it drives him up the wall. Even during the day, he can't focus, thinking of what you're doing, who you're with, what you're doing with that person, and so on. He can't get anything accomplished, and people notice something is wrong with him. Really, it won't be a very long time at all.

He's not a very good manipulator, and he can't really think of a good reason to get you to walk into the winery backrooms on your own, so as barbaric as it may feel, he'll settle for the old fashioned way, just taking you, probably when you're walking all by yourself late at night. He is very intelligent, and will most likely formulate a way of making you seen responsible for some crime upon your disappearance, to discourage you from leaving, and to make it seem less mysterious when you disappear. People will assume that the darknight hero got to you. And, well, they’re not wrong.

How difficult is it to escape from them? How do they keep you restrained? How do they deal with attempted escape?

Initially, he's watchful, staying at the winery so that you can't get far without him noticing. He'll cancel his plans elsewhere and make sure he's never more than sight distance away from the building. With time, he'll have to leave, and when he does, he'll probably invest in some very high quality locks to keep you in. Should that prove to not be enough, he'll have to use chains to keep you attached to the wall, instead. Needless to say, it's difficult.

If you manage an attempt, he'll be angry, sure, but he understands why. The first time, at least. Don't push it. If you manage to keep trying, his sympathy for you will slowly erode with each successive attempt, and soon he'll run out of mercy, and decide maybe just forgiving you isn't enough, and you actually need to learn a lesson to prevent this from happening again.

"Again? You really... Really don't give up, do you. This is the fourth time now... You've really pushed it, you know, I've tried to be nice. If you're not gonna get that, I'll make you understand."

How easy are they to trick, deceive, or manipulate?

Canonically speaking, he's fairly good at predicting the actions of others. He's clever like that. However, he's not the best at reading faces. As far as lies go, he will detect it maybe 80% of the time, but you can probably get away with a bit - once he catches you doing it once, though, he'll suspect you from there on out, and be much less likely to buy your lies.

When it comes to manipulation, he's one of the ones where it's like, he kinda knows, and lets it happen anyway, if it's for the sake of you being happy with him. That, and he's just flat out weak to your smiles and begging for little things. He's got his limits, though, so you'd be wise to only use this sparingly and not push it.

How lenient are they? What privileges can you have, and what will you be denied?

Protective to the maximum degree. Probably the worst of genshin boys.

Absolutely zero contact with the outside. No family, no friends, he might even go to the extent of faking your death to ensure there's not even anyone who will look for you.

Unlike Childe, Zhongli, or Albedo that I've mentioned as allowing you for walks or outside visits... That's not happening with Diluc. No, he's insanely protective, to the point that you very well might not see sunlight again, except through a window.

And he gets that it can get depressing, he really does, it's just the one thing he can't do. He'll try to substitute it, get you nice large windows to let the sun in that you can sit in front of - provided he's there - and maybe after a while build a little screened-in porch for the winery that you can walk around on - again, provided he's right there. You really can't expect him to let you out there when you're alone. What if someone saw you and tried to hurt you?

You get the feeling it's less about keeping anything else out, and more about keeping you in, though.

He's actually good about letting you do things for yourself, though. He won't restrain you from cooking or kitchen utensils or anything like that, unless you do something stupid like try to hurt him or yourself, in which case it'll be a revoked privilege.

What kind of rules do they have? What kind of punishment would they use?

Initially, he tries to go easy on rules, as part of his attempt to make you more accepting. He'll keep you more restrained for the first little while, and later on you'll be allowed to walk, but certain sections of the building will be off limits. He's fairly simple - be obedient, stay inside, don't try to fight. He'll invent new ones based on your behaviors as time goes on, but for the most part, he doesn't want to control you too much.

He fears getting too mad and making you scared of him, so, he struggles to punish you initially. He's probably willing to let quite a bit slide, but once he senses you're taking advantage of that, he'll put an end to it. Once again, he can thank the fact that he's naturally intimidating - he'll grab your jaw and force you to look at him, and honestly, just the look on his face is enough to send chills down your spine. If you're persistent, he's not able to leave you all alone and isolate you, no, he can't handle being away from you for that long. He'll appeal to the punishment of boredom, tying you to one spot and giving you nothing to entertain yourself with will get you to crack in a fairly short amount of time.

Humiliation works well, too. You're all alone except for him, you don't need clothes. So if you want them, you'll have to behave.

How do they deal with rivals, or perceived rivals? Will they get rid of them? Will they kill them themselves, or find another way?

This man only has to look at people to send them running. He's very grateful for his scowl once he realizes the power it holds. You'll be none the wiser as to why everyone you meet seems to end up avoiding you, why people get nervous when you approach, why you can walk into a public place and it will clear out within minutes of you walking through the door. It's ok, though, since you have him to go to for your problems. He'll shrug and tell you he doesn't know why it happens to you, but it's no big deal, you don't have to worry about it, because you don't need them anyway, right?

He's not above having chats with people either. If they're not driven off by the glares, he'll give them another chance by spelling out very clearly that they should back off.

With persistent offenders, though, he has to come up with other means. He's not a delusional, and he knows deep down that this is selfish, that they're not really doing anything wrong per se, but his anger is violent and ultimately overrides any guilt. He'll find a way to make them out to be criminals, spies, or some other form of bad person, and they'll meet their fate at the hands of Mondstadt's mysterious nighttime vigilante.

How easy is it to make them mad? What does their anger look like?

His default personality is... Irritated. He scowls a lot, he gets exasperated easy - even if he tries to be a bit more pleasant for you. His irritation is so common that seeing genuine anger is a bit rarer.

When he does, though, it's one of the worst. To really, really make him mad, you'd have to be exceptionally, intentionally bratty to the point of antagonism - he's understanding and lucid enough to understand why you fight him, why you try to run, but do it over and over relentlessly, or just be a childish brat and ignore his warnings, and he'll snap. His voice bellows when he's mad, it's deep and terrifying and echoes off the walls, his eyes narrow and he stomps heavily with every step. He'll grab you by the arm hard enough to bruise, and if you refuse to follow and dig your heels in, he'll just roughly swing you onto his shoulder and carry you.

He has to exert the anger in some way, though. He's not like some yanderes that can be talked down or calmed, or are going to go easy on you if you apologize and beg. Once the anger is there, it's there until he physically takes it out in some way.

So they see you as above them, beneath them, or equal to them?

It depends, really, because he's highly lucid, so he has very little delusions about you. Unlike many of the others, he's willing to acknowledge your mental competence, and if you're intelligent and have life experience he'll acknowledge it. He won't recognize physical capability, though, since you're nothing compared to his strength. If you are a capable, independent person, he won't delude himself into thinking otherwise. It will, however, have a negative effect, probably the opposite of what you hope for - he's going to feel a bit intimidated by it, really, because if you're capable and independent, you don't need him as much. He's more likely to find ways to force your dependency on him, if so, but deep down he knows you're an equal on a mental level, and it's frustrating.

Now, otherwise - if you're a little more on the ditzy, airheaded side - it will be below. He's realistic, again, and if you genuinely do fall into the category of being naive and a bit dumb, he'll recognize it. He feels more secure in your dependency, and he's more likely to baby you this way, and will absolutely be more protective.

How determined are they for you to love them? How hard will they try to make it happen? Or are they content just having you?

He really wants you to. He's not sure if he deserves it, though. He's acutely, painfully aware of how awful the things he's done are, and to top it all off, he knows that he should wish he was a better man that had self control, yet... He doesn't. He can't lie to himself and pretend to even have a shred of regret, even if he feels guilt. If he hadn't done all those things, you wouldn't be here with him like this, and even though he knows it's selfish, so very, very selfish, knowing that the horrible things he did got him the result he wanted makes it worth it. And given the opportunity to go back, he'd do it again.

He wants you to genuinely love him, and even though he struggles with human affection and communication, he'll try his best to be sweet to you, say nice things, try to be less irritable, try to talk more.

But if dependency, isolation-induced attachment love is the best he can get, well, that's still love.

Bonus: Is there anything that makes them unique, in comparison to other yanderes?

He likes to just... Spend time in your presence. He's still ultimately not much for talking, he runs out of things to say very quickly and even if you're not talking, he's very very happy to be around you. If you're being cold towards him even, he wants to just sit there and be beside you, if you get up and sit on the other side of the room, or walk to another room (provided you have the privilege to do so), he'll follow you wherever like a little lost puppy and just silently sit right back down next to you again. He soaks in your presence like sunlight, it makes him happy.

If you show him affection, especially after an abduction or when stockholm syndrome starts to set in, it's one of the few times you'll see him smile. His smile is soft and faint, and it's less his mouth so much as his eyes that seem to light up. If you show him affection, you can eventually reach a very vulnerable, very soft side of him. He keeps up walls for everyone else, and he kind of desperately wants someone he doesn't have to do that with, so he'll crumble to your affection fairly quickly, once he's assured of your love.

Also, he's one of the ones who fully understands why you're mad. He gets it, he's lucid, and he honestly knows how awful what he's doing is. He still hopes you'll get over it, though, and if confinement and isolation except for him is what it takes to achieve that... So be it. Rather than justifying his actions, he acknowledges what he's done, but he's aware that psychologically, he's already long past the point of no return, and he can't bring himself to stop.

“I know this wasn’t... what you wanted, and, I know it’s, I know this was really, really bad, but I only did it for your sake. If you just... try to get used to it... maybe you can be happy, if you try.”

General perverseness: how sexual of a person are they? What’s their drive like? How touchy do they get? Do they have any reservations about sexuality?

High, but embarrassed as all hell. He likes to maintain a very respectable and serious image, and people knowing that behind that neutral poker face is a brain running through nasty, nasty fantasies would not be very conductive to that image.

And that's what he does - working the bar gets very, very slow sometimes, and there's not much to do but sit around and let his mind wander. The more bored he gets, the more involved in these fantasies he becomes, and sometimes you might have to tap him on the shoulder to snap him out of it.

He feels guilty, really, for how he feels about you, and he knows that it's wrong and violating... But. But if you don't know, it won't hurt you, now will it? Nothing about the fact that he just thinks about bending you over the bar tables and fucking you raw is going to actually do anything bad. It's harmless.

He won't be touchy or perverse towards you by any means, and while that's nice, it causes something of a... Buildup. A lot of urges and needs have gone unmet, a lot of desperation to just feel you skin that has never been filled, and the thing about buildups is that when you reach a certain point they'll eventually burst, which is going to be what happens once you're in your new home.

How forceful are they? Do they care about your willingness?

He's moderate. He'd like you to want it, he's not highly sadistic and doesn't get off to your struggling/crying the way Childe or Kaeya would. But, in the end he's very set on what he wants, and if you're not open to it, he's not going to wait long. As aforementioned, he's got a lot of pent-up need that has gone unchecked, and while he normally strives for self control, at the point of kidnapping you, he's built up enough sexual frustration that he's not going to be very patient. Again, he's not going to be mean about it, he's more the type to just kiss your forehead and mutter a few reassuring things, even as you hiss at the pain of being impaled. That's another issue - he's convinced you might just be intimidated by the size, so he'll keep reassuring you that it's not going to last long, your body just needs time to adjust, even though you feel like you're being split in two.

He's content with knowing that, even if you mentally aren't wanting it, your bodily reactions show that you're clearly not repulsed or anything.

He's also another one to use that very thing against you, much like Albedo. He can feel you twitch and clamp down when you're close and he'll tell you that if you love him you'll cum, and if you don't love him, you won't. But no amount of trying to bring yourself down is enough to override the overwhelming stimulation.

He's also one to get rougher/more intense with time. At first, he's a bit afraid of hurting you, and he's not entirely familiar with how this all goes, and even can be a bit prudish and reserved. But the more he fucks you, the more and more he realizes he really likes having a sense of control and dominance over you, and just how nice it feels to come home when he's frustrated from a bad day and just fuck that energy out. Once he realizes you're not going to break or anything, you'll notice him gradually getting rougher and harder with time, until it becomes a norm.

What sort of kinks or fetishes do they have, or would they fill?

Stomach bulging/size kink

He's not normally an outwardly prideful person. His pride is more of a silent aloof type of pride, rather than a smug showoff type. He's not one to emphasize his positive traits just to look good. But, fuck, if there isn't something very, very pleasing about being able to physically see his dick making a bulge on your stomach every time he fucks into you. He'll make sure you don't close your eyes, grab your hair and pull your head down so you're forced to watch it fill you more than you can take, over and over.

He doesn't want to hurt you, really, but of all the things to whimper about, you just had to squeal that it's too big, that it hits your cervix, that it's splitting you apart, and as much as he really wants to be a good guy, you're really making it difficult. Hearing that just breaks something primal in him and makes him want to fuck you harder.

It's one of the few things he can actually get smug about, watching you clutch your gut and whimper from bruising and soreness even long after, and as time goes on he might lose enough shame about it all to make a smug comment. He knows he should feel bad. But again, you make it hard to.

Breeding

It's a possession thing, really. There's something so utterly satisfying about just watching cum drip out of you, listening to you whimper whenever you feel it filling you up. It's kind of cute, when he tells you he'll cum inside you and you panic, you squeal and wriggle and unintentionally clench down hard enough to make that happen, you practically just milk the cum out of him when you do.

Forced feminization?/housewife kink/I dont know what to call it but hear me out dammit

He has in his brain this idea of a perfect little housewife and you're going to fit that model whether you want to or not. When he breaks into goes back to your old apartment to bring clothes for your new home he'll only pick the most frilly, feminine of all the things you owned, and if you don't have too many, he'll buy ones for you.

He just likes the idea of having a nice, sweet little wife to come back to, especially after being so stressed with whatever bullshit he's had to put up with that day. Really, any darling in captivity is kinda sorta filling that role, but he's got a very specific image in his mind of you being very... Domestic. Submissive. Frilly little clothes and aprons and cleaning things and making food, it's very cute and gives him a weird sense of dominance that will inevitably turn to arousal - something about the whole ownership and submission aspect of seeing you walk around in those clothes, doing your little chores makes him really want to grab you and bend you over the nearest surface and just - well, you get the idea.

And he's not gonna listen to your whining, either, even if you're a naturally tomboyish person. You could have been the roughest adventurer there was out there, all ragged and getting covered in scrapes and climbing mountains and fighting monsters, but that's in the past, now. Now, is time for you to give that lifestyle up, in favor of a better one, one that will make you happier... if you just let it.

How do they feel about pregnancy or babies? Do they want them?

He's yes and no, but mostly yes in theory. It fits into his little housewife fantasy and he feels it would be a good way to keep you attached to him. It would make you less likely to leave, it would give you something to do all day, you'd be happy. He's a bit worried about his own capabilities, though. He's not super empathetic and he's not very talkative. Ultimately, it would probably end up an accident that results from the aforementioned breeding kink.

What kind of (nsfw) punishments would they use?

Another one kind of like Razor, he's not gonna think it out too much, but holy fuck, if he's mad, just fucking feels like a punishment in and of itself. You'll realize just how much he's holding back on the regular when you see what it's like when he hold nothing back. It's bruising, it's brutal, and it's a little frightening to witness that kind of raw strength. He'd be one to pick you up into the air completely, holding your whole body up with his arms, forcing you to cling to him so as to not fall while he bounces you up and down on him. And really, once you account for the affect of gravity, so it's slamming into you at unprecedented force, and fuck, it's likely horribly painful, even if that pleasure is still there.

If he's exceptionally mad, he's another one willing to belt you, and while he'll certainly get off to it, it's something he'll only do when he genuinely has a reason to punish you.

What body parts of their darling do they like the most?

Thighs. He likes hooking them over his shoulders, grabbing the fleshy soft parts with his hands, running his hands up and down the sides. One day, one you're comfortable enough, he'd really like to just lay his head down on them like a pillow, they look so soft. And he loves looking at them too, loves things that show just enough of the curve of your hips to your legs and the soft skin underneath.

#fellow diluc simps rejoice #for i am here to feed thy needs #yandere x reader #yandere genshin impact #yandere diluc #tw: noncon #tw: dark content #tw: misogyny #sorta?#chr: diluc

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softtransbf · 3 years

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Fresh Blood, Old Scars Part 1

You'd disappeared 15 years ago without a trace- what's Yancy supposed to do when you walk into Happy Trails Penitentiary and don't recognize him, because he's transitioned? canon compliant trans!yancy/reader

Reader: he/him trans man, no physical description

Rating: T

Warnings: mentions of violence, canonical and parental. deadnaming and misgendering before either of you came out (none by anyone who knows the correct name/pronouns)

Word Count: 2,690

“Hey Yancy, I heard there’s fresh blood comin’ in today for some sorta museum heist.”

“Oh? Know anything else about these guys, so we can give ‘em a proper welcome, Bambam?”

“I know some. The first guy, Mark Iplier, claimed to have been in charge of the whole thing, but from what my sources said, it’s the partner that ran the show- just real quiet-like. I’ve been told that he don’t say a word.”

“Got a name for this, uh, silent partner?” He chuckled at his joke.

“Y/N L/N.” Yancy’s stomach dropped the way it always did when he heard that last name, your last name. Get your shit together. Wrong first name, and Bambam said he and his. Bambam don’t use pronouns other than they/them unless they’re sure. It’s just some guy with the same last name.

“Yance, you okay?” Tiny waved his hand in front of Yancy’s face.

“Yeah, yeah, just, uh, thinkin about how best to greet dese guys. The usual, wit Don’t Wanna Be Free ready just in case?”

“Right off the bat? You really think they’re that high of a flight risk?” Sparkles finally spoke up.

“I, uh, I don’t trust dem silent-types. They’s always schemin’, got somethin goin ahn in their heads.” And if he's anything like- yeah. Gone before you know it.

“Okay, if you say so. I’ll go let the others know.” Yancy didn’t even register who was speaking; he was too lost in memories.

- 15 years earlier-

Yancy knew it wasn’t cool to be excited for the first day of school when you’re a senior in high school, but he didn’t care. He didn’t need or even want to be cool- all he needed was to be your friend. Well, maybe not just friend. You’d been gone for almost the entire summer, and he’d spent the whole time figuring out how to both ask you out and tell you that he’s a guy.

He practically skipped across the street to your house so you can walk to school together, like you had every day since middle school. He knocked- nothing. Rang the doorbell- still nothing. He checked the back door and the spots where you had hidden spare keys over the years- nothing. All the curtains were drawn, too, so he couldn’t see inside. He kept trying as long as he possibly could before he had to sprint to make it to class just barely in time. All day, he kept an eye on the door, waiting for you- the two of you made sure to sign up for the exact same schedule before you went on your vacation. At lunch, he went to the office to see what he could find out.

“Y/DN isn’t a student here anymore- Mr L/N just told us last week.”

“What? Do you know where they went?”

“I’m sorry, hon, I don’t. All I know is that Y/DN is no longer a student here.”

He’d never ditched a class in his life, but that was the last thing on his mind as he ran home, crying. He didn’t stop crying for weeks.

-Present -

He’d never wanted to be wrong more in his life, but there you were. Looking better than he’d ever dreamed, following Mark around silently as he blabbered on about wanting to rally the other inmates to try to break out. No. I lost you once, and it cost me everything. I’m not about to lose you again. He quickly spread the word to skip pleasantries with the new guys and prepare for the song. As he was, you made eye contact with him from across the room. His heart dropped; you didn’t recognize him. You looked right through him, with the same calculating expression you gave everyone else. Of course he wasn’t gonna recognize you, dumbass. You’ve been on hormones for years and have had top surgery. Usually Yancy loved that he couldn’t see anything of the person he used to be in the mirror, but today he hated it more than anything in the world. Stick to the plan, Yance. He doesn’t recognize me, but it might be better this way. This way, I can get him to stay and get to know me as I am now, and he won’t be disappointed that I haven’t become anything like what we dreamed of so long ago.

Yancy couldn’t have planned it better, Mark practically begging Jimmy to punch him through the wall right before the show started, leaving you alone.

The number went great, as always, but then you showed him a picture of your parents. He knew that picture; you took it when the four of you went on a vacation together before you started your freshman year of high school. He also knew that he had once been in the picture, but you’d cut him out. The tape and staples that had been holding his heart together since you left fell away.

He stuck with his usual response to people citing family for wanting to leave, for the most part. No one at Happy Trails knew about you, and he’d killed his parents before they could leave him, so he’d kept his true abandonment issues to himself. Face to face with you after all these years, though, he couldn’t stop himself from adding “they’re always just gonna leave you behind” and a warning about trifling with the past. You flinched a little at both of those, and a spark of hope ignited in his chest- maybe you hadn’t forgotten about him, even if you didn’t recognize him now.

Then you still chose to leave. The rest of the rather single-sided conversation was a blur to him. Later, as he was tending to his injuries in solitary, he remembered calling you handsome and/or beautiful and your blush when he did. And, of course, you knocking him flat on his ass. He’d challenged you to a fight, because he’d always been able to beat you before. The part that truly left him confused, though, was why he offered to help you break out.

All he’d wanted for the last fifteen years was to go back to the day you left and beg you to stay. He’d told himself dozens, maybe hundreds, of times that if he ever saw you again, he’d do everything in his power to keep you with him. On his darker and angrier days, he truly meant everything. But here you are, and he offered to help you leave. This is what you get for even hoping someone might stick around. Let’s just do this. I gotta stop in with the warden first, though…

“Me? Out there? With you?” He chuckled. You had no idea that, with that simple gesture, you offered him everything he’d wanted for so long. Fuck, I don’t deserve him. I still love him, but he deserves someone better than the angry, selfish man I am. The fragments of his heart splintered even more. “I, um. I done a lotta bad things. And, uh.” He made himself brighten up. “This is home! For now, anyway. Maybe next time parole comes up, I’ll, uh” take it and go find you like I should have fifteen years ago. And I’ll spend every minute until then trying to become the kind of man you deserve. “Anyway, I gotta get back to it. You take care now, you hear? And, hey, visitation! Every third Sunday!” You looked down at the box you’d brought with you, and he ran. When he got back to his cell, he cried genuine tears for the first time since that August day when his world turned upside down.

- 2 weeks later, visitation day -

He knew hoping you’d come was a waste of time, and that he was just setting himself up for more pain. He’d learned the hard way that when you were gone, that was that. But still, there he was, looking up every time a guard walked into the room. As expected, they never called his name. The rest of the inmates gave him a wide berth as he went back to his cell for the night, and they were right to. He was itching for an excuse to fight. No one gave him one, though, so he told himself he’d find one tomorrow and got ready for bed.

When he got to his cell, it took him just one second to realize there was someone on his bed, pull them off, and shove them against the wall. It took him three more to process that it was you, and then another five to step back and let you go.

“Sorry for scaring you, Yancy. I didn’t mean to. It’s just… it’s visitation day, but I’m still wanted for the escape you helped me pull off, and I haven’t decided if I want to come back for good or not.” He stood there, frozen. You chuckled nervously. “I get it, your turn to be the quiet one. I’m sorry about that, by the way. There was a lot to process all at once, and I just kinda shut down when I get overwhelmed.”

I know. I remember that you didn’t say a single word our first day of high school, Yancy wanted to say. He wanted to say something, anything, but you being there and so close was just too much.

“Okay, so, honesty time; there’s a specific reason I came back.” You took a deep breath. “I haven’t been able to shake this feeling that I know you, somehow. But I know I’d remember meeting you- no way I’d forget someone like you. Anyway, I'm probably way off base and ridiculous. I guess I just wanted to tell you?” You ran your hand through your hair. “God, that sounds even flimsier than it felt in my head. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be. It, uh. It means a lot that you came back to say that.”

“Uh, Yancy? What happened to your accent?”

“Shit. Um. C’mere.” He muttered, as he sat down on his bed and pulled you down next to him. He prayed that you couldn’t hear how his heart started racing when he noticed your knees were touching. “No one here knows that the accent isn’t how I always speak. Not even the warden. I’ve been here five years and haven’t dropped it once. Anyone learns about this, and you’re dead, understand?” He knew that the threat was empty, but you seemed to believe it.

“Yeah, yeah, I do, don’t worry. Your secret’s safe with me. I gotta ask, though- why fake it? It seems like a lot of effort. You don’t owe me an explanation, of course, but since you’re heart-on-your-sleeve about your parents, it must be one hell of a reason. I bet it’d feel good to let it off your chest. I can promise to leave and never come back if you do- a burden shared is a burden halved, and if I’m gone, you can be 100% sure no one here will know.”

He took a deep breath. “Something flipped my world on its head, and I needed to distance myself from who I was before. That’s an odd phrase, though- ‘a burden shared is a burden halved’. Where’d you pick that up?”

“Oh, um. The mom of someone I loved a long time ago used to say it a lot. It just kinda stuck, I guess.”

“Loved, huh? You break their heart, or did they break yours?” Yancy was surprised he got the words out without his voice shaking or cracking. You were silent for a long time, and Yancy was sure he’d pushed too hard and you would completely shut down or, worse, leave altogether.

“Sorry, I haven’t talked about this… ever." Your voice shook. "I’ve never talked to anyone about this. I don’t know if I was loved back, but if so, I was the heartbreaker. I didn’t mean to be- I couldn’t control having to leave, and I didn’t know I wasn’t coming back until it was too late. I couldn’t say goodbye. I’ve hoped every day for the last fifteen years that my feelings were unrequited, though. I’m happy to have the pain of an unrequited first love if it means she wasn’t heartbroken.” The incorrect pronoun stung a bit, but you didn’t know, and you’d loved him back all those years ago. He was invincible.

“Have you tried reaching out? Even if your feelings were one-sided, I think you owe it to both of you to say them, at least once.” He reached out and took your hands without thinking. You didn't stop him, and he felt like he could fly.

“I tried, actually. About eight years ago, I'd, uh, escaped and was finally an actual person again after everything that was done to and taken from me, so I started looking for her. But it’s like she vanished off the face of the earth five years to the day after we were separated. It’s actually how I met Mark- I got into some deep and shady shit looking. I only gave up last year. Nothing turned up in seven years of searching, so I have to figure that she did something incredibly stupid a decade ago and got herself killed.”

“I didn’t die. Just the name did.” Yancy breathed. A half second later, he realized he’d said it out loud, and his heart stopped. You took your hands out of his and scooted away.

“Yancy. Are you trying to tell me that you’re- that we- oh my god. It is you. I knew I knew you. Everything else is different, but I should have recognized your eyes. I guess some part of me did. But you- I- I thought you were dead.”

“As you can see, I’m not dead, Brain. And for the record, your feelings were definitely not one-sided.” He reached out and cupped your cheek with one hand.

“Shit, Pinky, it really is you.”

Yancy had dreamed about how seeing you again would go in a million different ways. Not a single one of those included you practically jumping into his lap and kissing him with a lifetime's worth of love and want.

He let out an undignified whine when you broke the kiss. “Wait, wait. You knew from the second I walked in here who I was, didn’t you? You tried so hard to stop me from leaving… but then you helped me do just that. You chose to stay here when I asked you to come with me. Then I came back, and you got me to say all those things… And we’re both trans and wound up here? This is all just. So much. I can’t- I can’t do this.” You got off his lap and scooted to the far end of the bed.

“What are you saying, Y/N? That you’re leaving? Again?” He couldn’t keep the bitterness out of his voice.

You stood up and faced him. “You do not get to play that card. You don’t know how much I went through trying to find a way to tell you I was sorry, that I didn’t know that the trip was a permanent one until we were on the other side of the country. Dad said that I'd never see mom again, and he’d kill me if I tried to get in touch with you or anyone else from back home. He broke my arm to prove he meant it. I can’t stay here to unpack all of this. I have to go. But you can come with me. I mean it even more now than I did last time. I’m not leaving you, I’m leaving here.”

You walked to the cell door and looked back at him with a sigh. “But I know you, and you have a family here. I’ll get you my address- it’s your turn to come to me, when you’re ready. I’ve waited 15 years to be with you again, what’s a little bit longer?” Without giving him a chance to respond, you kissed him again and were gone.

#yancy x yn #yancy x reader #yancy x male reader #yancy x trans male reader #yancy ahwm #ahwm fanfiction #otp: don't want to be free #self ship fanfic #self shipping fanfiction #self shipping fic

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autisticshadowthehedgehog · 2 years

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“Power Enriched by the Heart” - Chaos Emerald Filmverse Theory Fic Fun Facts

Spoilers below!

“FAQ” will denote questions I get asked a lot. The rest are just for kicks.

First off, the Word Counts:

Morganite!Amy - 6,986

Heliodor!Tails - 3,191 - the shortest

Johnkoivulaite!Blaze - 7,502

Bixbite!Shadow - 12,074

Goshenite!Silver - 7,094

Maxixe!Sonic - 4,686

Aquamarine!Cream - 12,478 - the longest

Longest to shortest: Cream, Shadow, Blaze, Silver, Amy, Sonic, Tails

Fun Fact Corner time!!

Morganite!Amy – The Rose Emerald

Was gonna be a one-shot and then I said “fuck it”

FAQ: Yes, the Voxai are a canon Sonic alien race! They’re from Sonic Chronicles: The Dark Brotherhood, and Thebes is their leader following the Overmind Revolution. (The Overmind names are accurate as well.) When Thebes mentions a “Croesus,” whose family Amy helped out, that was a real character too.

The green emerald turning pink is an actual thing that happened in the game; when I saw that I was like “oh hell yea time to throw this in my theory” and then it all kinda fit? Amy’s psychic-adjacent powers, her quill-style... it just all fell together. So if this doesn’t happen in filmverse... well, I won’t be surprised, Chronicles doesn’t get touched for the most part, but it’s like. gift-wrapped for them

You might ask, “Connie, if you assume the emeralds attach themselves to babies that already existed, how did Amy end up in the glass?” Good question. I didn’t think of that when I wrote this because, again, it was going to be a one-shot. My guess at this point is whoever brought Amy to the emerald died or had to flee before she fused with it.

The Overmind slowly getting more and more corrupted is something that kinda happened in-game; Thebes mentions that they used to be cool but got corrupted by the void they were all trapped in. Since we don’t have a void, this time it just happened due to them getting power-hungry.

Honestly the MOST fun with this chapter was writing the Voxai reacting to mobian anatomy. It’s much more similar to human anatomy, and the Voxai are super different, so I had to like. figure out how an alien who looked and acted nothing like us would react to it. I also liked the bit where he’s like “wow not having a hivemind must be lonely af,” as we would think it would be stifling/invasive, but it’s something they’re used to, like how we’re used to not being a hivemind.

I wanted it to be clear that Amy was not neglected or shunned by the society, but still felt isolated simply for being a vastly different species. So everyone is nice to her, of course but the planet isn’t built for her and she notices, which fuels her anxiety.

Also, yes, her saying “Cause that is who I am!” is a reference to the Shadow’05 motif.

And, yeah, the Morganite is literally called the Rose Beryl. filmverse please tell me you’re using this concept please

The Black Arms don’t get named for several chapters, but yes it is supposed to be them attacking at the end of the chapter, hence the paralyzing gas.

Original drafts had Thebes taking Amy to the temple previously, and he’s like “This is a very sacred place, we should be respectful.” and she’s like “So where did you hide the snacks in here.” “Over there.” I thought that might make the chap too long. If only I had known how long the Shadow and Cream chapters would get.

Also, yeah, “daughter” and “dad” were used for the first time when Thebes sacrifices himself for Amy. bc fuck it I love pain

Originally was going to end with Amy disappearing into the portal, but I wanted to write her getting up and moving herself on (inspired by “Next Right Thing”). Then I was like “yeah she should meet Cream.”

Heliodor!Tails – Catch the Wind

This ended up being the shortest and tbh I expected that; I considered padding it out by sticking my “Tails hates Thunder” one-shot to the end, but decided against it cause all of these chapters were gonna be depressing anyway, let’s let Tails be happy here

Had to be careful not to call him “Tails” after the intro paragraphs– he didn’t have a name as a loner, and then Longclaw named him Miles. Tails is a Sonic-specific nickname.

It was also fun to write a hyperintelligent toddler who was raised outside society. So, like, he knows what’s going on, but he hasn’t processed much of language yet, since he lives in isolation.

In case y’all don’t know, my theory for Tails in Movie 2 is that he’ll be raised by Longclaw and will get the death scene that was cut from the first movie.

I needed a reason she would find Tails, so I had her follow Chaos Energy. And, yes, Tails brings her the same sunflower Sonic brought her.

Tails’s powers are wind-based, so it’s less telekinesis and more airbending.

“Your branching went well.” is a reference to how baby owls hop between branches before flying. Honestly I don’t know if this is the official term or if I’m just remembering my Guardians-of-Ga’Hoole phase, but yea

Writing flying was also interesting too, seeing as, you know. We can’t do that. And I haven’t been skydiving or anything so I don’t know shit, hope it came out okay.

Johnkoivulaite!Blaze – From the Ashes

Phoenix imagery inspired by the part-bird!Blaze fanon theory. I thought about incorporating it here but that might get a bit too complicated.

Also yes, Johnkoivulaite was only just discovered in 2019, so it doesn’t have any “meanings” yet. Someone get on that

FAQ: Gardon is a real character, from Sonic Rush Adventure. tbh I thought he was older than he seems to be in-canon but fuck it, my fic my rules

Honestly, I was about a section into this when I was like “who should Blaze’s people be fighting?” and then I remembered that Robotnik isn’t on Sally’s planet so she’s gotta fight against something else and went “oh yeah. it’s all comin together”

It was hard thinking of missions for Blaze to do without putting her in the line of combat, bc even her imperialist parents know that would be a bad idea, so it was mostly “set fire to stuff so we can do the fighting.” They definitely intended to use her in the army once she was older though.

The few paragraphs of Blaze in the ocean for the first time may be my favorite part of the whole fic.

The first child to attack Blaze, before Sally, was supposed to be Bunnie, but I couldn’t decide if she would have prosthetics now or later, so it wasn’t very clear.

FAQ: Did I intentionally write Blaze and Sally in a lowkey romantic way? Not at first but like, why not?

“Is that the right word? Parley? I mean I wanna do a talk on neutral ground, but I don’t know pirate terms very well. That might just mean ‘meeting.’” this isn’t Sally talking this is me

“You’re the princess, aren’t you? That’s what we thought, but last time you were seen in public you weren’t purple.” This was about when I figured out my main theory on how the Chaos Emeralds were made, so this was an early hint that Blaze was brought back to life by the stolen emerald.

Blaze is about eleven when she meets Silver; Sonic is roughly ~13 in the filmverse, so that would make Blaze about twelve while the first movie is going on. The idea was that she’d spend a year with Silver and the Knothole Freedom Fighters before whatever happens and she meets Sonic– perhaps 2-3, depending on when she shows up in filmverse.

The “coyote with a sword” who’s about her age is Antoine.

Sally also met Silver inbetween her first talk with Blaze and this meltdown; she didn’t know other emeralds had become people when first talking to Blaze, but when she sees her again she said, “We’ll play with chaos!” referencing that she’s going to call in Silver.

The original draft had another gap between Sally yelling at Blaze and the Silver meeting, but I decided against it in order to keep the pacing flowing.

Silver’s meltdown at Blaze makes more sense in retrospect, but yeah, he’s confused that anyone would use their powers for evil, esp since he just figured out that his were meant to protect.

The end of this chapter, her diving into the water, was planned from the start. Also: the island she intends to swim to, a “southern island,” is indeed the Southern Island that Marine is from.

Bixbite!Shadow – Wish Upon

Fun fact on this one: 5/7 of the chapter titles are three words long. This one is two, while Sonic’s (chap6) is four, so it evens out.

I knew for a fact I wanted this to be Maria POV before I even wrote the other chapters. She’s a fascinating character who doesn’t often get to tell her own story. It was real fun trying to figure out what would be interesting about Earth to someone who grew up in space.

Maria is about two years older than Shadow; since I had him iced at ~13, she’d be ~15 when she dies.

And writing the Black Arms from her toddler-dream-vision was also fun as fuuuuck

Maria’s middle name, Yuri, is a reference to her Japanese voice actress, Yuri Shiratori.

The mention of her mom building the crib or tinkering with boxes is a ref to the Robotnik Inventor Gene that seems to be present lol

“She wanted it to have as many stars as possible, so that her little girl could always reach for them when she awoke.“ and the chapter’s closing line are references to “Reach for the Stars” from Sonic Colors.

gonna be real, her dad dying in a collapse is similar to how Cream’s dad died. Was that intentional? No, I was having trouble thinking of non-disease ways someone could die

“Well, Maria, we can’t breathe in space, so we doubt Shadow would be able to.” “I bet I could.” ref to the fact mobians can somehow breathe in space???

“He’s right, Grandfather, they’re too chunky, and I can taste the specks.” this was pandering to me and me only. I’m autistic and could taste.... idk what else to call them! the specks in vanilla ice cream!! and everyone made fun of me but guess who has a diagnosis now bitches

Maria being “homeschooled” is also pandering to me and me only

Maria being fun-loving and a bit of a prankster was a) in an attempt to make her seem more human, b) an attempt to connect her personality to Rouge and Sonic, c) the Cain Instinct™. I have two sisters i know how it works

Her and Shadow folding cranes while talking about Earth is a ref to Sadako and the Thousand Paper Cranes.

one of the kids being named “Jean“ was a reference to the og singer of “Reach for the Stars,” Jean Paul Makhlouf.

“Oftentimes he’d just sit beside Maria and mess with his bracelets while she and Melissa got into arguments about their interpretation of Arthurian legends...” “Melissa” is a reference to the english voice actress for Merlina, Melissa Hutchison, from Sonic and the Black Knight, and lowkey to my sister’s Merlina theory.

“Rebecca” was a reference to one of Maria’s english VAs, Rebecca Honig. "Marc” was Marc Thompson, the english VA for the Commander in ShTH.

The “You must really like watching the planet spin, Shadow” is a rough adaptation of the flashback Shadow has in SA2 when he asks why he was made. Taken more from the Japanese lines than the English ones.

“We started attempting lifeforms before you were even born. Your mother helped us design the first but it didn’t turn out so well.” = Biolizard

The implication with Gerald’s ramblings is that Black Doom helped them create a body for the emerald to host, and to their surprise, the emerald really wanted to be alive.

“Oh my God,” she said, dumbfounded, “There’s a bottomless pit in here.” Why DOES Gerald’s computer room have a bottomless pit what is WITH that

The “three Robotnik passwords” are a running joke with me and my sister Cori “birdsareblooming”: either hitting it really hard (which Shadow did in ShTH), EGG (reference to the real time fandub of SA2) or a family name cause they’re sentimental bitches.

The cannon they see is the eclipse cannon; it being created around the time Shadow was born references Gerald planning to double-cross the Black Arms.

Tthe “noctune study” and “gizoids” Maria sees mentioned are a reference to Sonic Battle and Sonic Chronicles, where it’s revealed Gerald was studying the Nocturnus clan and their gizoids, specifically Emerl.

“Maybe Earth is obstructing his view of Venus?” If anyone doesn’t know, this is a Looney Tunes joke.

I also liked the idea of Maria being able to ground Shadow and make him think things through; he’s very impulsive without her.

It’s implied a bit in ShTH that GUN knew about the Black Arms, so that was the implication as to why they freaked out on seeing Shadow.

Also the end scene is 100% my headcanon for how the ARK massacre went, with Maria saving Shadow instead of herself.

“Wherever one of your aunts is, or...” Reference to the fact Eggman, you know, is her cousin, so her Robotnik parent had at least one sibling.

Goshenite!Silver – The Silver Age

Named after the subseries comic that Gold appeared in!

Originally I didn’t name Silver’s home planet, in later chapters it’s referred to as Cascade, which was the name of Molly’s planet in Sonic X season three.

Silver’s parents were both enby.

Gold being his sister in this one-shot was mainly for two reasons: 1) Exploring the idea of the sibling of a living emerald and what they would be feeling, 2) I needed someone for him to be traveling with lol

“I don’t like starting fires” = reference to him fistfighting the fire demon in like every scene of Sonic 06

Silver and Gold don’t know the name of the Black Arms, hence “the Destroyers”

Gold’s “maybe you’re right”s to Silver were intentionally a bit repetitive; due to her telekinesis, she has a bit more pessimistic worldview after hearing the thoughts of so many desperate people. But she doesn’t want Silver to lose his optimism when they lost so much else.

“may Illumina help you” is a reference to Illumina in Sonic Shuffle, one of the many Sonic gods.

“He began to glow with a soft, silvery light, though against the river it almost looked cyan.” - Silver’s telekinesis is cyan in the games, but considering how the Sonic filmverse powers look, if Silver’s the silver emerald his magic would be silver. and now Silver doesn’t look like a word

“and it wouldn’t be until later that Gold hit a growth spurt.” Gold is four feet tall in her comic appearance (when she’s 15); at the same time, Silver is 3′3. Gold is among the taller mobians

Gold’s “accident” was my way of incorporating her telepathy in; the idea being that a bit of the chaos energy prevented her from dying, and so she has a little. Not an even split like Cream and Cheese, but enough that she started getting that psychic shit

“Every planet they’d been on had eventually succumbed to chaos. Everything would eventually, he thought. But then it would grow back. Like the sprouts in the ashes.” Formally, this is a reference to the IDW comic short of Silver and Blaze growing a garden. Informally, I was thinking a lot about The Beatrice Letters at the time.

“It’s not your fault, either. We’re just kids.” the thesis of the fic lol

Thinking about the telekinesis as like. extra limbs? Was really fun to write

“Carefully, she took his hand; as she did, he caught a climpse of the glow under his glove, swirling in a circle.” A reference to the marks on his gloves.

I knew that I wanted to end Silver’s time on this planet with him and Gold burying the bodies. Just a simple act of respect for people they barely knew– or, in the Black Arms’ case, their own enemies, really shows their characters.

The original intention was to end the chapter after they hopped through the ring, but I felt like I kinda needed to explain how they found their way to the Freedom Fighters, seeing as we saw them in Blaze’s chapter. After that, it took me a while to find a decent end spot. So Dulcy my beloved it was

Maxixe!Sonic – To Act Too Soon

Yes, I intentionally wrote it so that readers might think the POV character was Longclaw, sorry about that, I thought it’d be fun lol. But I did have some foreshadowing, including:

The title: it’s part of Aleena’s lines in the Sonic Underground opening: “To act too soon could seal their fate.”

The ship being called The Queen.

The bit after children were mentioned saying “And she had someone very important to help today,” implying that Sonic was already in the picture.

When talking about a quill pen, and it says “she’d take one of her own,” I did intentionally leave it ambiguous whether that was a feather quill or hedgehog quill to further sow confusion. But yea, her pen was a feather, her quills are, you know. hedgehog

The mentioned Zoah are also an alien species from Sonic Chronicles.

The Queen was a reference to Aleena’s title, but served a dual purpose to referencing fellow thief Fang the Outlaw’s aerobike, the Marvelous Queen.

Ref to the Babylonians is a ref to Sonic Riders.

“It had happened to the Metarex, it could happen to any of them.” Reference to the headcanon/theory that the Black Arms were the ones who attacked the Metarex/Cosmo’s species in Sonic X.

The repetition of Aleena thinking “If you have time to worry, you have time to run” is a reference to the similar line Sonic says to Elise in Sonic 06.

Her “ceremonial sword,” while not mentioned, was intended to be Caliburn from Sonic and the Black Knight.

“It was noisier than she expected, but hopefully that would be chalked up to the heating system.” Movies never talk about how loud crawling through the vents is

Her thoughts about being orphaned at ~3-5 is a reference/parallel to Sonic leaving Longclaw at the same age.

Gods mentioned: Gaia, Illumina, Solaris, Chaos. Illumina and Chaos were explained, Gaia is from Sonic Unleashed, Solaris from Sonic 06

Many people were surprised that Sonic Underground made an appearance here. So was I; I wasn’t sure at all what I wanted to do for Sonic’s one-shot for the longest time, since basically everything he does was chronicled in the first film. Then I thought “what about the literal moment the emerald fused to him,” and I ofc had to think of a parent to grab it for him. I honestly prefer Aleena + his sibs to the other parent(s) in canon, I think they have a lot of potential, so... Aleena it was.

Was a bit hard ending it after the emerald, so a little clarification: I left it ambiguous how they got separated, but my idea was that they had to separate for his safety, and she left him with Longclaw knowing that he’d be protected there.

The lullaby she’s singing is “Someday” from Sonic Underground.

Aquamarine!Cream – Whatever It Takes

I knew this was gonna end up the longest and I wrote it anyway bc I’m a masochist and now I don’t know what words mean.

I wanted to bookend, by starting this chapter and the first one the same way, and ending both the first and last chapter with Amy finding Cream.

The Heliodor is said to have gone to the Kitsune– which is, you know. What Tails is

I couldn’t think of any other words for “shrine” so I had to use that like eight times in a paragraph.

“Mainly the echidnas who still thought they should hold the powers of chaos themselves.” Reference to the “warlord” echidnas in movie 1, led by Pachacamac.

The chao declaring her a guardian by surrounding her was lowkey a reference to the chao choosing to show Tikal the Master Emerald. The chao know who to trust.

It was very important to me that Vanilla keep her simple character– she is content with a simple life, doesn’t want to show off or get credit for everything. Despite being a guardian of an emerald in this universe, she needed to still remain her nice, humble self. I hope I got that across!

FAQ: I did make a family tree to keep track of Vanilla’s fam. One is nameless, the other with random names I thought up after writing the fic, with the idea that they’d all be dairy-based.

Vanilla’s father’s Zari (“Daigo”) used ze/zir pronouns!

I feel like “Sarasson” was a she/they. Just a feelin i have

The tunnel memorizing would have been like. my nightmare. thank God for Vanilla knowing how to read that shit

The mention of Vanilla clenching her fists while remembering the tunnels is a muscle-memory thing– sometimes clenching your fist helps you remember things.

Yea, the scene of her and her father at the emerald was highkey inspired by the opening scene of Raya and the Last Dragon.

The lights of the other emeralds were added in order to give Vanilla a reason to think the other emeralds may have turned into mobians, and get that fear in her before Cream was born so that she’d be extra desperate to separate her daughter and the gem.

FAQ: the green emerald changed to pink when it was still a gem, a little before Thebes took over guarding. It became Amy much later.

Her husband, Casein, was named after a protein often found in dairy.

The journal was a last-minute addition to the one-shot, as a way to explain more of her research into her spell.

The paragraph about how her mother liked to keep busy, and how Vanilla liked to focus on baking– haha yeah I was listening to “What Baking Can Do” during that mayhaps

The family eventually moved on with their lives– her brothers were never really happy being farmers, her cousins and aunt/uncle moved to another area– unfortunately leaving Vanilla alone, after being used to living in a huge family her whole life.

Her brother sending feathers from Soleanna is a reference to Elise’s feathers in Sonic 06.

“The world kept turning” still had my music blaring and ended up with “Dos Oruguitas” which. yeah influenced the Casein stuff

The sloth farmers were a lowkey reference to Rocket and his family from Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog.

Gonna be real, I had Vanilla pass out mainly because I don’t know how mobian labor would work. How long would it take– it takes about a half hour for a rabbit to give birth, and 4-8 hours for a human, so like??? What do we do here

The intended implication of what happened when ‘Nil was passed out was that Cream was stillborn or born very very weak, and the chao and Aquamarine jointly decided “well that’s not happening” and had her fuse with the gem.

Yes, baby rabbits are actually called kits! Found that out

The novelization of the Sonic movie mentioned that his electric blue fur was part of the giveaway for his power, so it made sense to me that some of the more oddly-colored emeralds would be obvious giveaways, hence Vanilla’s panic. Silver, Tails and Shadow are relatively safe, because silver/orange are normal colors and Shadow got the goth Black Arms blood, but Blaze and Sonic were basically fucked. Amy is only in danger if people know that the Emerald changed to a Morganite.

The implication behind the spell is that it probably wouldn’t have worked if Vanilla hadn’t cared so much; she wasn’t an experienced magician, she was making up her own spell, she didn’t know at all what she was doing, but the love and determination she had at that moment fueled the chaos energy. Also, not technically canon to the fic but I like to think the Aquamarine was like “yeah they’re hunting Maxixe for sport rn I should probably find a way to protect this host”

The intention with Cheese, too, is that they’re similar to a daemon from His Dark Materials; a technically separate but still intrinsically-connected soul to Cream.

Amy doesn’t know that Vanilla knows about the emeralds; there was supposed to be a scene where Amy tearfully infodumps everything she knows about the emeralds and Vanilla pretends to be surprised and then continues to support her as she had before, but the chap was already long enough, and it seemed like them going to the garden was a good place to end it.

I did leave it ambiguous how old Amy was– 8-10 about, but the thing is that would make Cream very very young. Then again, she’s running round on her own when she’s six in the games, so mobians must just age fast. Or maybe that’s just Cream. Anyway, Amy spends at least a year with Vanilla and Cream before her inevitable filmverse entrance.

#chaos emerald theory #sonic cinematic universe #sonic fanfiction #mine #connie writes

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anika-ann · 3 years

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One Door Closes... (S.R.)

Type: one-shot, pretty much canon

Pairing: Steve Rogers x reader Word count: 2700

Summary: For Steve, your door is always open... or he thinks so. And even when it isn’t, it is.

In which one small Zoom mishap leads to an (un)usual ‘welcome home’.

Warnings: brief mention of blood and violence, lightest angst, attempt at humour, crack-ish, fluff and language

A/N: For @anjali750, because this is totally her fault. Thank you for inspiring me :-* Have a little bit silly weekend reading, y’all!

“Tell me about it,” Steve encouraged you gently, soft smile playing in the corner of his mouth despite the pain it must be causing him due to his busted lip.

You couldn’t but grin at the lenient picture he made. Feeling blood rush to your cheeks at the thought of him probably calling you cute in his mind if his expression was anything to go by, you obliged, proceeding to tell him about the new project at work.

Your project. Because somehow, you finally earned your boss’ confidence and could bring the great ideas in your mind to life.

You felt so giddy just talking about it! So you started explaining, excitedly gesturing with your hands so Steve would get the right visual and you grew so enthusiastic that you almost forgot to keep an eye on him.

But you were watching him – always.

His lower lip was split, but already healing – it would have healed much faster if he stopped tugging at the healing skin whenever he talked or smiled at you from the screen. He looked a little drowsy, a shadow of a bruise forming on his cheek, but as far as you knew, those were the only injuries he had; that and many hours of sleep to catch up on.

Steve had a habit of calling you via Zoom whenever he got back to the Tower from a mission. He usually took a quick shower and was online until the last second before he had to leave for a debriefing; the only reason why he didn’t head straight to your place.

He admitted once that he loved seeing your face and talking to you even if for a moment after a mission, that it grounded him. On a very sappy and loveable moment, he even called you his sun; and the fact that after few minutes of being with you – as much as technology allowed – his face always seemed brighter, made you think that it truly was how he felt.

Even exhausted as he was now, you could tell his half-lidded eyes shined with life unlike when you started the call.

And so you kept rambling, feeling your heart bursting with love for your man and with euphoria, because goddammit, finally some recognition at work!

“Well, obviously, to reach as much general public as we can, we’re gonna launch a world-wide campaign! World-wide!” you emphasized with a blinding grin, throwing your hands wide to demonstrate.

---and your fingers caught in a cord from the laptop, pulling at it.

Steve’s benevolent face disappeared as your screen went black.

Because of course it did.

You had been talking yourself into buying a new laptop or at least having this one fixed for a few weeks now, because this was always the result whenever you accidently unplugged it. The battery was useless, ready to retire.

“Motherfu--- ugh!“

You wanted to be mad at the device – but this was totally on you.

Sighing, you hooked up the laptop again, waiting for it to wake up from a coma, shooting Steve an apologetic text in the meantime. Closing your eyes, you let your forehead lightly fall against your desk, mentally cursing yourself.

Dummy. If you only weren’t so lazy… and didn’t hate certain aspects of adulting with so much passion… you could have been talking to Steve-

Your eyes flew opened when it felt like it was quiet for too long; no reply to your text. Dread filled you and you quickly reached for your phone again, this time to dial.

You prayed you were wrong; but as the phone kept ringing with no one to answer it on the other end, you felt misery creep up you back and whimpered. Sliding your phone on the tabletop, your not-so-deft fingers stumbled over the keyboard, harshly welcoming it into the world of living by opening Zoom again to reconnect the call.

Your breath hitched in anticipation as the window opened---

An amused and yet somehow unimpressed face of Natasha Romanoff welcomed you and this time, you didn’t bother slowing down as your head hit the desk. It hurt, but that was only a presage of the real pain.

“Nooooooo,” you whined loudly, faking and not quite faking a sob, because shit.

“Oh yes,” Natasha hummed nonchalantly.

You straightened a bit in your chair, narrowing your eyes at her as you noticed the corners of her lips twitching while she pretended to be busy checking out her possibly-mission-broken nails.

“It’s not funny.”

She snorted and glanced at your no doubt desperate face.

“It really is. But also kinda sad,” the spy noted, something resembling concern flickering over her face before she scrunched her nose, irises twinkling. “And disgustingly cute. It has Rogers written all over it.”

You glared at her some more, not even bothering to roll your eyes.

“Tell that to my landlord,” you muttered under your breath, leaning your elbow on the tabletop and dropping your chin to you palm. A second later, a brilliant idea hit you and you tried to manipulate your legs from under you.

The thing was, even if you had a pretty good idea of what was coming if you didn’t stop it and knew that it would be a bitch to deal with, Natasha was right.

In a way, it was utterly cute, disarmingly charming and entirely heart-warming. Your stomach fluttered, the fabled butterflies flipping their wings, your face grew hot and your heart… well, it felt as if it was growing in size.

It was also sad, heart-breaking even; Steve, especially after a mission, was a man running on instincts. It was one of the reasons why he had developed a habit of calling you, why he wanted to hear you ramble about your either boring or exciting but always wonderfully normal day. A day which involved no shooting and no blood besides papercuts and a quarrel with your stubborn boss who shoot you glares at best.

On a mission, these carnal automatisms often meant survival. But back home, Steve didn’t want to be a sum of instincts of survival, fight and fear; he wanted to feel again. And with you, he did. He wasn’t just a Captain America, a soldier to be put on battlefield whenever the general found fit. He was a human being. A wonderful one at that, with beautiful soul.

So yes. It was also rather upsetting.

And in a way, it was a little funny too. You knew it was totally your fault and that Steve was being kinda ridiculous, because he knew you and your inclination to wild gesticulations ending up catastrophically. On top of that, he was aware of this particular problem being almost a daily occurrence; hell, he tried to talk you into having Stark look at your laptop and failed.

And now... well. Here you were.

“You know, maybe if you get up and welcome him with door opened…” Natasha teased you with your own genius ides and you grinded your teeth, frantically trying to move your foot, which was pretty much on fire and yet dead.

“I would, but I… eh, pins and needles, was sitting on my feet,” you explained, embarrassed, testing whether your feet could carry you or not, naturally finding that without support, you’d be down before you could take as much as a step.

This time, Natasha didn’t snort in amusement.

Instead, she graced you with an outburst on honest full belly laughter, her red hair unfairly shiny for a woman who just spend week on a mission in damn Moldova and probably kicked more asses that you could imagine.

“You know what, Romanoff…” you grunted, forcing yourself to wobble towards the door. Very slowly. And cautiously. Knowing your luck, you might actually get hurt.

“I’m not even sorry,” she choked out and then continued to howl in laughter. “You so deserve each other. I finally know what the ‘idiots in love’ mean. Thanks for that!”

“You’re very welcome,” you huffed, voice dripping with irony.

Finally able to put full weight on both of your feet, you headed towards the exit – and entrance – of your apartment.

Halfway, you decided it was a lost cause. You would be willing to bet that the moment you’d touch the doorknob, you’d get hit to your face. It wasn’t worth it.

Yes, maybe if you did get hurt, it would make Steve think twice before coming all guns-and-shield blazing into your apartment; then again, it would probably cost you a broken nose.

Not to mention Steve’s tendency to get swallowed by the enormity of his guilt.

So not worth it. Best if you stayed put.

That was what you kept telling yourself when you stood there for about two minutes, in which you’d be able to open the door about forty times. Your annoyance – mostly with yourself and the cackling redhead – and the anticipation was becoming unbearable. As seconds ticked by, you were trying to convince yourself into taking the last few steps and opening the door and save yourself some trouble---

You yelped when the loud bang rattled your apartment the door sent flying of their hinges along with a spray of powered plaster despite knowing it was coming.

A glint of metal appeared next, the striking red, white and blue no longer there as it was covered in more bland colours for stealth missions.

And then a large figure cladded in blue shirt and grey jeans entered, his chest heaving, face flushed with red. Piercing blue eyes wiped of all previous traces of tiredness scanned the room, instantly falling on you as you awkwardly stood there, dumbfounded, startled and utterly speechless.

Also, much to Steve’s puzzlement, you were perfectly fine otherwise – even with both legs functioning, no remnants of pins and needles present.

Steve eased his posture instantly, eyes narrowing and then widening as he looked you up and down, lips parting in genuine surprise – and relief.

He said your name, clear and almost reverent, dropping the shield on the floor with a clang.

The ‘hi babe’ got stuck in your throat as you could see the tension leaving his shoulders, his eyes turning glassy and absent despite relief rolling off him in damn tsunami waves.

It hit you like a train – that you were delighted to see him, actually see him, even under these circumstances; and you truly didn’t want him to withdraw to some freaky brain-space after he had probably got one of the most ridiculous scares of his life due to the fact that his brain was not fully back in the normal world.

In the normal world where you abruptly disconnected a call without warning, because you talked too animatedly and not because some terrorist high on the FBI’s, CIA’s, NSA’s and SHIELD’s most wanted list found out you were Steve’s girlfriend and decided to take you out.

So to prevent another psychical horror trip of his, you went for distracting him – with a very relevant issue.

“You broke my door.”

Steve blinked, gaze refocusing on you fully, simply staring for a long moment.

“You went offline,” he objected quietly, a hint of accusation in his voice. God, you missed his voice.

“You broke my door, Steve.”

As if hearing his name was a spell, his frozen figure came to life and he took a cautious step closer, repeating his previous statement, this time with a hint of guilt.

“You went offline.”

“And you broke my door. That’s the second time this month, Steve! My landlords gonna k--- be real pissed at me,” you corrected yourself in the last second, not wanting say kill.

Steve ignored the slip and apparently got the message, his face twisting in genuine apology. “I’m sorry. I’ll fix it!”

With efficiency of a supersoldier, he spun on his heels and rushed to pick up the door as if it was lighter than a paperweight and swiftly put it in place.

Only for the door to slowly tilt his way again. He caught it with a loud curse and moved it aside, leaning it partly against the wall. The action sent more plaster down onto the floor, like the only truly white snow in New York City. Peripherally, you noticed Steve grimacing, his face an expression an epitome of yikes.

You let your eyes slipped shut, shaking your head with a sigh, but couldn’t but chuckle. When you looked at Steve again, he resembled a 240 pounds giant Labrador puppy, truly regretful, approaching you reluctantly as if he was afraid you would slap his big paws for being clumsy.

What he would deserve was for you to clip round his ear for impulsiveness, but could you blame him? God knew what he had seen in Moldova in the past week, what horrors he had lived through and what a nightmare his mind had created when you ‘went offline’.

Him barging in like this due to your own dumbassery was kinda sad; a prove of his demanding job full of terror.

It was cute and heart-warming, because he just cared for you that much.

It was a little ridiculous, because as Steve finally crossed the distance between you two, the head of your elderly neighbour peeked from behind the empty doorway, puzzled and rather concerned.

You snorted unattractively, the scene in front of you seeming epically hilarious all of sudden.

“I’m good, Mr. T!” you called over Steve’s shoulder after the poor man who gossiped like an old woman and was just as hospitable. “Just my boyfriend fussing because of a technology fail!”

A grin spread on his wrinkled face; a testimony to years of laughter and amiability. “Oh. Hi, Mr. America!”

“Afternoon, Mr. T! I am verry sorry for disturbing you.”

The older-looking man waved off Steve’s politeness.

“It’s fine. You keep taking care of your lady, Mr. America, and keep her safe!”

“Yes, sir,” Steve humoured him with a salute, earning a wink.

As your neighbour walked away with a fresh topic for his Sunday tea party, Steve turned his attention to you again, eyes searching, wide, apologetic – but also soft, taking in the view of you, revelling in it.

“Hi, sweetheart,” he whispered lowly, the lopsided smile you loved so much gracing his face, once again pulling at that damn split lip. You grimaced a bit, the sight of him almost brining tears into your eyes; the gentleness and the remnants of fight punching you straight in the gut.

His eyes fluttered close when you lifted your hand and traced the line of the bruise on his face with the lightest pressure you were capable of. This time, tears definitely prickled in your eyes, but you blinked them away, cupping Steve’s cheek and pulling him close.

“Oh come here, babe,” you breathed out, fingers carding through his hair as he leaned his head on your shoulder, lips brushing the crook of your neck, strong arms embracing around your form.

He was warm and big and held you a bit tighter than necessary and dammit, you loved your sweet of heart and occasionally dumb of ass boyfriend. Boyfriend, who was crazy in love with you. Sometimes with emphasis on the crazy.

“I missed you, sweetheart,” he muttered, nose nuzzling the sensitive skin of your neck, breathing in deeply. You pretended it didn’t do things to you as he did everything to get lost in you and leave all the bad behind. You failed.

“You’re totally paying for fixing my door.”

Well, maybe not failed entirely.

“Of course,” Steve assured you dutifully, no hint of humour in his voice.

It broke you on a completely new level; he was serious. Dammit you loved this man!

“I missed you too,” you finally admitted and this time, he did chuckle, squeezing you even tighter, hand running up and down your back. Without any warning, he tightened his grip and lifted you from the floor so you had to cling to him entirely, causing you to gasp.

You never got the chance to gather your wits and comment on that, because an annoyed voice of a certain redhead sounded from your laptop.

“…alright, you crazy kids, you had your cuddles. Now, Rogers, should I tell Fury you’re coming back for the debriefing or should we just finally change with the times and do it over Zoom?”

Clutching Steve’s waist and shoulder, face contentedly in his chest, you voted for the latter.

Steve Rogers masterlist

Lovely divider by whimsicalrogers.

A fic from collection ‘This was supposed to be a drabble.’ Also, I couldn’t for the love of god figure out a better title.

I hope you enjoyed at least a bit :-*

Thank you for reading!

#fanfiction #steve rogers x reader #steve rogers imagine #steve rogers x you #steve rogers #captain america #captain america x reader #captain america x you #captain america imagine #steve rogers fluff #captain america fluff #steve rogers fanfiction #captain america fanfiction #marvel #mcu #one door closes #anika ann

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dsmp-shitposts · 3 years

Text

OKAY I'm in an analysis mood so!!

Here's why "Savior" by Rise Against is such a good song about c!wilbur and c!Tommy's relationship in the dream smp!

Firstly tho I just want to give an honorable mention to the first lines of the song: "it kills me not to know this / but I've all but just forgotten / what the color of her eyes were / or the scars and how she got them." it's such a good c!bee duo line and I might have to analyze it in another post lol

(there's kinda a tldr at the bottom if you don't want to read the specific lyric analysis and just was the overall analysis!)

The lyrics I want to analyze (these are more about characterization) are: "as the telling signs of age rain down / a single tear is dropping / through the valleys of an aging face / that this world has forgotten." this is about wilburs resurrection. the first lyrics, "as the telling signs of age rain down" are about how much more different Wilbur looks to Tommy after he was resurrected. wilbur was in limbo for what he perceived to be 13 years, and he shows it physically. he has the white streak of hair that signifies his revival, and I know there's a popular headcanon that wilbur came back "wrong." "A single tear is dropping" is referring to Tommy's reaction to the revival. we know he was in disbelief and even angry at wilbur being back, but intense emotions also can bring on tears. it's a very natural response from your body. The third line is pretty much the same as the first, but "that this world has forgotten" is about wilburs impact on the history of the smp. obviously he's been a very big player in many major plot points, but since his death he has mainly faded to the background in most characters minds, especially after ghostbur's library with all the records from lmanberg got destroyed. as the smp progressed, wilbur got talked about less. focus shifted from him to dream who really emerged as the villain in the story after wilburs death. we can see the impact of this after wilburs revival. everyone on the smp had gotten used to living without him for so long, growing past the people they were when Wilbur was alive. and now when Wilbur gets revived, he expected fanfare and everyone welcoming him back, but in reality people's memory of him faded.

okay now that we have the preface lyrics, we can go into the ones that are more about tommy and Wilbur as a duo. the first ones before the chorus are "but seldom do these words ring true / when I'm constantly failing you / walls that we just can't break through / until we disappear." I'm gonna analyze this with the first two lines and the last two. the first two lines are from Tommy's perspective about him trying to constantly please wilbur. we see this with him gathering lots of stone for him and following Wilbur to stand against Las nevadas and quackity. but even with all of this, Tommy still feels like he's "constantly failing" wilbur and that he needs to do more in order to stay in high regard in Wilbur's mind. we could even look at these same lyrics from wilbur's perspective! wilbur might have felt like he's failed Tommy for not being there for him for the time he was in limbo. I know Wilbur doesn't know about what dream did to Tommy in the exile arc, but I'm betting that if/when wilbur finds out about that, he will feel horrible for not being there himself to stop dream because wilbur cares about Tommy. (this could even lead to him resenting ghostbur more because ghostbur was there but wasn't able to do anything). now with the second half of these lyrics, the "walls that we just can't break through" is referring to the emotional vulnerability, or lack thereof, between the two. I'd argue that wilbur is more emotionally vulnerable to Tommy than Tommy is to wilbur. now, there is a severe lack of communication between the two, but wilbur drops "trauma bombs" where he'll unload something all at once and suddenly. he doesn't do much internal reflection of his feelings, instead wanting to share with others, Tommy in this case, to get validation. with sharing, he wants people to agree that he's a bad person but at the same time wants them to refute those ideas so he feels like he's healing without actually doing anything. now Tommy does more introspection about his feelings (cc! Tommy monologuing) and doesn't feel as big a need as wilbur to share his feelings and trauma. and besides, Wilbur dominates the conversation most of the time anyways so Tommy wouldn't likely be able to carry a constructive conversation about his own feelings without getting talked over by wilbur.

now we're moving onto the chorus! it goes: "that's when she said / 'I don't hate you / I just want to save you / while there's still something left to save' / that's when I told her 'i love you / but I'm not the answer / for the questions that you still have.'" I see this as a conversation between Wilbur and Tommy; Tommy saying the "I don't hate you" section and Wilbur saying the "I love you" section. it's important for Tommy to make it clear to wilbur, and himself, that he doesn't hate Wilbur despite his past betrayal of lmanberg. wilbur thinks everyone hates him, so Tommy consistently sticking by his side is a reminder to Wilbur that he isn't alone. Tommy staying by wilburs side is also how he's ensuring that wilbur doesn't spiral again ("I just want to save you"). he knows that wilbur still isn't in the best mental place, not having the right environment to heal in limbo, so it's more crucial in his mind to be wilbur's crutch right now because it'd be very easy for wilbur to spiral again ("while there's still something left to save"). wilbur, with his part of the lyrics, wants to ensure that Tommy knows he still cares about him despite being gone for a long time. now for the last part of wilburs lyrics, I would love for it to mean that "wilbur understands that he can't be a good mentor to Tommy anymore because of everything that happened. he wants Tommy to realize that he does care for him but their relationship shouldn't function with Wilbur as a mentor anymore," but that wouldn't be accurate to their canon relationship. wilbur still wants to be Tommy's mentor because that's how their relationship has always functioned. my hope is that in wilbur's healing process that he realizes he doesn't have to be a mentor to Tommy, they can just exist as friends. and I would love for Tommy to realize that it's not his job to save Wilbur! while having friends you can talk about your emotions with is good, he shouldn't have to push his own feelings aside to prioritize wilbur's. wilbur also needs to learn that self reflection is a part of healing

the final specific lyrics I want to analyze are: "one thousand miles away / there's nothing left to say / but so much left that I don't know / we never had a choice / this world is too much noise / it takes me under once again." the first three lines, in my opinion, all relate to the fact that Tommy had gone through so much while wilbur was dead, such has dream's manipulation. the last three lines of this section, which are honestly my favorites, are relating to both of their revivals. even though wilbur and Tommy have developed so differently since the lmanberg and pogtopia eras, they have this one thing in common. Tommy didn't have a choice in his death or resurrection. both were committed by dream and have contributed to the massive amount of trauma and PTSD that Tommy has. wilburs death was practically by his own hand as it was an assisted suicide, but his resurrection wasn't his choice, again done by dream murdering ghostbur. that line could also refer to wilbur not feeling like he had a choice in living anymore, feeling like death was the only option for him at the end of his spiral. the last two lines refer to the mental problems that both Wilbur and Tommy are still facing. we talked about wilburs a bit with his need for validation and him villainizing himself in his mind. Tommy still struggles with suicidal ideation, seen most recently with his comments while on the balcony in Las nevadas. he also struggles with his triggers from the final control room and the prison that we see him try and speedrun exposure therapy for. what I'm trying to get at with this is that wilbur and Tommy have developed so differently while away from each other but they have their resurrections in common.

OKAY CONCLUSION TIME!! (also kindof a tldr)

while Tommy and wilbur have been apart from each other for a while and developed in different ways, their relationship after both of them have been revived is centered around both of their relationships to healing from their trauma. Tommy feels like he's the one who has to "save" wilbur and keep him from spiraling again, letting his own feelings be pushed aside to prioritize wilbur's. wilbur lets himself be the saved to Tommy's savior. he consistently seeks out validation for his own feelings instead of taking the time to sort out how he really feels about the things that have happened to him.

if you read this far then oh wow thank you!! I hope this made sense and I'd love to hear what you think of the comparisons to this song!

#dream smp #wilbur soot #tommyinnit #crimeboys #crime boys #dsmp analysis #c!wilbur #c!tommy #dream smp analysis #tw suicide #tw death #suicide mention #death mention #the shitposter speaks

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firefly464 · 3 years

Note

The newest oneshot was super sweet, I’ve already reread it once! Wouldn’t be surprised if I do so again tomorrow, either, haha. Do you think you could write something similar for the sleepy bois streamer counterparts :0? Thank you!!

OH BOY I HAVE HAD THIS ONE SITTING IN THE MY DRIVE FOR SO LONG THANK YOU FOR GIVING ME AN EXCUSE TO FINISH IT

ALSO YES THIS ONE IS CANON TO THE REAL WORLD STORYLINE!!!!!

Original Story - Other Drabbles

~~~

“Will, I really don’t think this is a good idea.” Tommy nervously said into his mic.

“Nah, don’t be stupid. It’ll be fine, I swear.” His friend replied.

“I don’t even- I’ve never met these people before, and now you’re telling me to just act normal?” God, he hated meeting new people. Over the past month or so, he had grown used to his new lifestyle, but speaking to new people always freaked him out. Especially if they were people that had known the old Tommy. He always felt under pressure to be someone that he wasn’t. He hated it.

So when Wilbur had told him about two friends that he wanted to introduce Tommy to, it had taken all of his energy not to scream. He knew that Wilbur was just trying to help him feel more welcome, but that didn’t change the fact that he would rather crawl into bed and just lay there if it meant he didn’t need to talk to new people.

“I mean, that’s what you’ve been doing, isn’t it? Why is this so different?”

“Because the other Tommy knew these people! They’re gonna expect me to act like him. How the fuck am I supposed to tell them that I’m not really the guy that they were friends with?”

“I dunno, you told me and Tubbo, didn’t you?”

“It’s not like I had a choice. It was either tell you or watch as my entire fucking world got destroyed.” Tommy ran a hand down his face in frustration. Why was this so difficult for Wilbur to understand? He was acting like it was no big deal, like nothing could possibly go wrong.

Tommy, on the other hand, knew that was complete bullshit. So many things could go wrong. Why couldn’t his friend understand?

“Yeaaaah, sorry about that. Look, I can promise you that these are good people. They aren’t going to fucking interrogate you. Besides, if you do start feeling uncomfortable, you can always just leave the call. Sound good?”

The teenager was silent for a moment, trying to weigh his options. On one hand, he hated this idea. He hated everything about it. But on the other, he knew that Wilbur wasn’t going to leave him alone until he at least tried. Besides, his friend was right. He could always just leave the call if he really needed to. “... Fine,” he finally said. “I’ll fucking do it I guess…”

“Fuck yeah!” Wilbur cried out excitedly. “Sweet, I’ll add them to the call real quick”

Tommy could feel his anxiety spike as he listened to the ringtone. God, this was an awful idea, why was he doing this? He shouldn’t be doing this.

He was about to leave, to tell Wilbur that he changed his mind, when an unfamiliar voice pierced through his thoughts. “Hulloooooo.”

The teenager couldn’t help but flinch slightly, as he often did when startled. Over the past month, he had grown less skittish and jumpy, but a month of therapy could only do much against half a year of battle instincts and war.

“Ayyy, Techno!!!” Wilbur’s voice was loud, filled with excitement. Tommy was forced to reach over to his keyboard and hastily turn down the volume.

“Jesus, Wilbur… Just go and give me a fucking heart attack, why don’t you?” He muttered under his breath. Unfortunately, his mic picked up on it.

“Oh wait, is that Tommy?” The man, who’s name was apparently Techno, asked. He sounded half-asleep, but simultaneously energized somehow. His voice was deadpan and calm, a stark contrast to Wilbur’s enthusiastic and expressive tone. “Tommy? Woah, woah, hold on. What happened? Are you okay? Were you hurt? Are you-”

This was why Tommy hated talking to his alter-egos friends. They always asked him what had happened to him, why he hadn’t contacted them in so long. He never knew what to say. So instead, he just stayed quiet.

“Alright, calm down Tech. Give the kid a break. We don’t know what kinda shit he’s gone through.” A new voice said.

“Alright, well you can’t blame me for being worried after he just disappeared off the face of the earth for a month,” the guy named Techno replied, “Seriously though, are you alright?”

“I’m fine,” he stated simply, shaking his head slightly. He was supposed to be acting like the old Tommy, not some quiet asshole who didn’t know how to talk with people. “It’s uh, it’s been kinda quiet to be honest. Sorry I didn’t reach out...”

He could practically hear the new person smiling. “Hey, don’t worry about it mate. We’re just glad to know that you’re ok. You had us all worried sick”

He attempted to chuckle slightly, but it sounded forced. “Heh, yeah... Sorry about that. I’ve been kinda busy”

“Yeah, that makes sense. Didn’t you guys go to florida at some point? Tubbo mentioned something about it.”

A small cough could be heard, and Tommy let out a sigh of relief as he was saved from whatever embarrassing answer he was about to give. “So, Phil! How have you been lately?”

As Tommy sat there, he listened as the other three began to talk about anything and everything, with seemingly no care as to what they were saying. At some point, he had ended up muting his mic, and just listening. It was almost calming, in a strange way.

Nearly an hour of silence had passed before Tommy heard his name again. Techno was the one who finally spoke up. “Is... Is tommy still there? He hasn’t talked in a while.”

“Not sure, it says he’s muted,” Wilbur responded.

“Is he ok?”

Tommy’s ears perked up. He half considered umuting, but his curiosity got the better of him. So instead, he simply stayed muted, and listened.

“He uh, he’s been through a lot.”

“Yeah, but he’s never been this quiet before. Ever. Not to mention, he’s practically disappeared off the face of the earth for a month and a half. What happened...?” Techno’s deadpan voice was filled with concern, something that Tommy couldn’t help but find slightly strange. He had never met these people before, and yet here they were, acting as though he was their family. It didn’t make sense to him.

“I feel like he should be the one to tell you guys, once he’s ready.”

“Alright,” Phil’s voice was calm, filled with a quiet understanding. “We can wait. Just know Tommy, because I know you’re still there you little shit, we’re here for you.”

A faint smile crossed his face as he reached over and unmuted his mic. “thanks... I’ll uh, I’ll make sure to keep that in mind.”

~~~

Taglist :D (feel free to send me an ask if you wanna be added)

@hismilw @violet–majesty @chiera99 @koi-boye @waffle-time-god @miss-oleum @porkgavor @crafted-dreams @harley-the-pancake @lemonaid-ruru @g3rmpy @somethingtocrowabout @bee-tubbo @firepowder @boombahey @rayjayo @carry-on-my-wayward-why @echo-delta @star-fruit23

#alright imma be honest #this isnt my best work #but oh well #the first part is good #but i feel like i kinda lost where i was going with it towards the end #and i didnt wanna make it a repeat of the last one #so here we are i guess #Tommyinnit #wilbur soot #wilbursoot #technoblade #philza #ph1lza #sleepyblr #sleepy bois inc #SBI #The real world #writing prompts #my writing

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chat-noir-always-here · 3 years

Text

Debunking “Adrien is perfect”

To voice a rather non-Marinette-like opinion of Adrien: He’s not perfect. He’s never been perfect. He has, in fact, been riddled with flaws from the very beginning. Part of the reason Chat Noir gets hate is because he serves to exaggerate Adrien’s flaws and make them more obvious, destroying the perfectionism façade. And the sooner Marinette tosses the “I love the perfect Adrien” filter in the trash where it belongs, and starts actively recognizing and acknowledging his faults, the better off the endgame relationship will be.

Long post is long and I don’t like cuts, cuz i’ve lost a few posts in the past using them. Please filter the tag “long post” I use it for walls of texts like these.

First of all, flaws are just one of the many things that happen when someone either learns something the wrong way, spends too much time in the wrong environment, lack any decent role models... really there are a plethora of causes. What i mean is character shortcomings aren’t necessarily reasons to hate the character themselves. They’re more or less internal obstacles put there to be overcome in order to portray character growth. Of course spending an exaggerated amount of time with these characters without seeing them overcome particular shortcomings is frustrating it does not necessarily mean they will never be redeemed or developed and are/were deserving of hate.

Except for Gabriel. That creature belongs behind bars.

Most of Adrien’s flaws come from his toxic home situation:

The Miraculous Wiki puts Adrien at fifteen. Meaning Adrien has only been actively leaving the house (for public school and the occasional social get-together) for about a year. His fourteenth birthday was one of the earliest episodes and im assuming his fifteenth birthday happened off screen between the s3 finale and the new york special.

Regardless the majority of his life was spent in isolation and his only company was his immediate family, Nathalie, Felix and Chloe. None of whom are particularly good role models except for Emilie. Maybe.

He’s rather overworked for a 14 y.o. boy. On top of school, he has fencing, piano and Chinese lessons. This leaves him with very little time for himself.

He lost his mother. In Feast, Adrien expresses Emilie was a source of joy in his life--”Only Mom can make me laugh like that.” Felix marked the one year anniversary of her disappearance. Worse still, we’re led to assume all Adrien knows is that Emilie disappeared. Did she abandon him? Was she kidnapped and killed? He doesn’t know. He has no closure regarding her absence.

On top of losing his mother, his only remaining parent is an emotionally manipulative and abusive prick. Gabriel has denied Adrien a birthday party, threatened to take Adrien out of school just because he can, never lets him have friends over for any reason, hardly ever makes time for Adrien and only once in a blue moon will actually sit and eat a meal with the poor kid.

And on top of all of this he’s not out of the woods yet. He’s still living with his abusive father. He’s still not allowed to see his friends outside of school much. He’s still got a packed schedule. He still doesn’t have closure regarding his mother’s “disappearance.”

Looking at it like this paints Adrien in a rather sympathetic light.

Marinette doesn’t know Gabriel is Hawk Moth either, but she does understand Adrien is lonely, isolated and in need of a source of love and comfort. She also understands to some degree that his heart is delicate, so she constantly handles him with kid gloves and looks on him with a perfection filter.

We see how Mari reacts to upsetting Adrien in Malediktator when she softly whispers an apology after Adrien expresses his sorrow over everyone celebrating Chloe’s departure. She’s seems pained and distraught over causing him to be upset. Thus the reason Marinette calls Adrien perfect isn’t that she never sees any of his flaws--she just cannot acknowledge or process them under these conditions. Shes too busy trying not to hurt him. She also has shown some signs of having extreme anxiety, which messes with ones head and makes it difficult--nearly impossible--to think straight. She wants to be the source of love and comfort he desires (and already is in a way) so his faults go unprocessed.

But what are Adrien’s flaws?

1. He has trouble standing up for himself.

He’ll take a stand for others.

He stood up to Chloe on Mylene’s behalf in Horrificator and on Marinette/ Cheng Sifu’s behalf in Kung Food. He stood up to Lila in Oni-chan and Ladybug. He stood up to Gabriel in Simon Says--but as Chat Noir, not Adrien.

There have only been two-ish instances of Adrien, not Chat Noir, standing up for himself. I say -ish only because he was kinda standing up for Lila in the first and Chloe in the second.

First in Volpina he stood up to Ladybug for how she handled the situation with Lila. He personally believed she handled the situation poorly (which she did--there were/are serious consequences for that. still) and although he was kinda wishy-washy in conveying that it was only because he was scared of sounding too much like Chat Noir. Her partner. Her chief-of-staff. Who can and will call her out on such behavior.

Second in Malediktator, when he more or less told Marinette she was wrong to be happy about Chloe leaving. Granted this was partly him standing up for Chloe, but aside from her—he, Adrien, was deeply upset chloe was leaving on such bad terms and made sure Marinette understood that.

Abused children tend to be somewhat submissive/agreeable/etc. They have trouble speaking out when they’re uncomfortable or don’t want something or think a particular action is wrong. Usually because they are anticipating some kind of punishment for speaking out or afraid of offending the other person to the point that said person wants nothing to do with them anymore, or both.

For Adrien to fix this particular flaw, he needs to prioritize himself and his own wants more. However he also needs someone who doesn’t chastise him for doing things he likes, tending to his own needs and setting boundaries. Kagami is not that person--she’s actually quite demanding of him and cold. Her understanding of relationships isnt great either, which is why these two really aren’t that great for each other.

2. He puts his faith in the wrong people

Adrien’s fucking household is about as toxic as it can get (please don’t take this as a challenge, S4). On top of his immediate family consisting of his abusive, toxic, terrorist father, there’s his cousin Felix. Felix who squished cheese under Adrien’s pillow, stole his phone, pretended to be him and sent an outrageous and awful video to his friends.

There’s also his mother Emilie whom, despite his love and adoration of her, lied to him for who knows how long and messed around with a broken miraculous to the point it forced her into an indefinite coma and left Adrien at his father’s mercy. There are theories that she did this for her family but nothing concrete or canon has been proven--all we know is that Emilie had been having frequent dizzy spells while she was still awake and using the peacock miraculous, and that she anticipated her fate and Gabriel apparently promised to save her.

There’s Lila, as well. “She’s not dangerous. She just craves attention.” Wrong, Adrien, she’s very dangerous. She is conspiring with your father to spy on you, attempted to get Marinette expelled from school, tricked you into leaving Ladybug alone with a supervillain whom she personally requested to kill Ladybug, pinned Marinette against a bathroom wall and almost got her akumatized, actually got Marinette akumatized and nearly cost you both the Ladybug Miraculous and TIkki. She isn’t just dangerous she is an actual threat, whether or not she is the future Hawk Moth who sent Timetagger after you when you were children with time-sensitive powers. Adrien has a slightly better understanding of that after the events of Ladybug and Oni-chan, so hopefully he will be on his guard at least in regards to Lila.

The reason for Adrien’s overly trusting nature may lie in the fact that literally everyone closest to him, everyone for the first thirteen years or so, was toxic and/or a liar. You know what happens when you can’t trust anyone around you? You live with it. You accept all these bad people as they are, without making any effort to establish healthy boundaries. Adrien certainly lived with it--how’s an abused, isolated boxed-and-sheltered son supposed to know what healthy boundaries are when he’s lacking any healthy connections? I bet he can just barely endure all the anguish but he can’t stand to be alone so he just tolerates it. Not to mention the most guilty is his father. Where else is he supposed to go?

Like a frog sitting in a pot of water, you don’t realize you’re in trouble until the water is too hot. So you just accept it--all the bad feelings--you accept it, live with it and it still hurts but you rarely complain. Because anything is better than being alone.

I think Adrien understands, deep down, that the love he is clinging to, the love provided by his relatives, isn’t really there. But if he looks at it too long and lets this knowledge sink in he’ll lose it. He really did lose it in Chat Blanc-- just that sky-crashing-down-on-him realization that he didn’t have his fathers love, hadn’t had it for a long time, just completely ruined our boy.

Of course the knowledge is there. It’s literally right there in front of his face and it’s only a matter of time before he is forced to turn and look and face the music. At which point I hope Marinette knows who he is and has a plan to save him otherwise Chat Blanc is just going to happen again.

3. Yes, he takes the flirting too far sometimes

No--that doesn’t make him toxic.

Yes, Adrien overreacted to Ladybug never showing up in Glaciator. He shouldn’t have been upset with her in Frozen for not accepting the rose. He should have told her the damn truth about being forced to leave the city at the same time she was in the New York special.

However, he also apologized for overreacting in both Glaciator and Frozen. And again, abused kids live in anticipation of punishment for their mistakes. Adrien’s father has taught him that the slightest mistake can result in loss of freedom or trust, even if its circumstances beyond his control. And he now understands that Ladybug isn’t going to blindly punish him for being honest with her, which he now knows to do.

He makes mistakes, apologizes for them, and learns from them. That’s not fucking toxic--it’s natural, human and allowed.

He’s flirty and suggestive, yes, but the minute she signals she doesn’t want it or isn’t feeling it he stops. He has had immense trouble with not flirting with her, despite her telling him she isn’t interested multiple times. That much is true. But he truly and deeply cares for her and he would never force himself on her and it isn’t because he knows she’ll kick his ass if he does. It’s because unlike the vast majority of his family, he’s actually a decent human being.

He has even begun to “flirt platonically,” toasting their partnership and friendship rather than offering a romantic relationship she can never say yes to. If that isn’t the most soft and respectful fluff I don’t know what is.

4. He is leading Kagami on

Did he cheat? I’m actually not sure. Thomas is being vague in his tweets and won’t give us a decent answer (because he likes “watching fandom burn”--i mean MOOD but clarify please).

Here’s what we know and have observed: 1. Chat Noir told Ladybug “I have a girlfriend” 2. He immediately followed that up with “It’s not good at all. I just said that to make you jealous” 3. He allowed Kagami to kiss him in the new york special 4. but he has trouble telling girls not to touch him--been a problem since episode one. Yes its generally cheek kisses chloe gives him but sometimes its not and he looked downright uncomfortable in a lot of cases of physical contact with her and with Lila 5. he seemed rather comfortable with kagami kissing him--except he did say no to her kissing him in the finale 6. but he’s also trying to move on from Ladybug and be with Kagami 7. If he were in a relationship with Kagami, he’d likely keep it a secret because both of their parents are controlling of them and may not allow it 8. His understanding of relationships and girls is kinda dreadful due to not having his mom around for advice and his father’s general lack of a concept of what healthy romantic relationships and boundaries are, and, as Nino put it, not being able to understand signals very well

Adrien’s current relationship status is up in the air. I’m about eighty percent certain he’s dating Kagami--but there’s still that twenty percent chance he’s not.

Putting aside the question of whether or not he and Kagami are official, Adrien’s been attempting to move past his feelings for Ladybug. Which--won’t sugarcoat it--he kinda sucks at. At the same time, Kagami is aware he is in love with another but lacks the understanding that his moving on will take time.

The main issues here is that Adrien knows who he wants but can’t have her. Kagami is a wonderful person herself and he wants to get to know her better, but they aren’t really a good match and they are both going to get hurt in the end (Love Victor anyone???). Until that happens we are going to have some questionable moments in the show, and we just need to remember that Adrien is a child with a poor understanding of relationships, and not an evil person. Kagami doesn’t necessarily have a great understanding of them either--”Your indecision hurts me Adrien,” “Adrien you and I are perfect for each other!”--and she has flaws of her own she needs to unlearn.

For the time being, Adrien is leading Kagami on (it needs to be said--even if they aren’t dating he’s flirted with her, given her roses etc.) I say leading her on because, no matter how much Adrien believes Marinette is just a friend and they weren’t flirting in New York, loyal boyfriends who wish to be monogamous don’t dance with other women.

Or look this happy when that other woman touches them

Does this make Adrien a deceitful and hateful character? No. Does this make him an unworthy character? No. It makes him an abused child with little to no concept of healthy relationships.

Also Adrien’s friends, including Marinette, have no reason to believe he is dating Kagami. They know he is interested in her and she in him, but as Nino said, Adrien has a hard time picking up signals and understanding their meaning. Not to mention the boy is fifteen. Flirting skills, understanding boundaries, and other relationship concepts are a challenge even for ordinary fifteen year olds in healthy environments to grasp--case in point: Marinette.

Adrigami and Lukanette are simply not going to end well. The Love Square is the endgame and ultimately both Lukanette and Adrigami are going to fall apart to make that happen--I knew that going into the possible Adrigami and Lukanette territory that the finale created.

Kagami is a strong, intelligent person--she’s likely going to be the one to end it given what we’ve seen. I don’t like to think about what might happen then--she may be akumatized and Chat Noir would feel rather guilty and may not be able to fight her. But they will both come out of it with something they needed--Kagami will understand (as Marinette needs to) that Adrien isn’t her perfect soul mate incapable of making mistakes. Adrien will understand relationships better.

Its unfortunate that this has to happen in order for Adrien to learn due lessons, given that he actually does have someone who can talk to him about girls and relationships and loyalty: Nino.

Given what Nino wasted no time in scolding Mari for spying on Adrien and Lila when she confessed doing so in Chameleon, as well as how he treats Alya, I undoubtedly believe Nino would be the one to come out and say “You can’t dance with Marinette when you’re with Kagami.”

Assuming he is with Kagami.

In conclusion: Adrien is flawed but not deserving of hate. He is a traumatuzed child stuck in a toxic household who lacks proper mentors. Marinette, Alya and Nino are out of the loop about his potential relationship with Kagami. And Marinette and Kagami both need to acknowledge Adrien is imperfect. Nino and Adrien need to do guy talk like two seasons ago.

Also Marinette probably has some intense anxiety issues. But more on that later.

#long post #adriennette #love square #miraculous ladybug #mlb new york #marinette dupain cheng #adrien agreste

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iammissingautumn · 3 years

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@cinnamonrollorder

Preface: I only read about three paragraphs into what you have down for the au so that I had room to make my own stuff without feeling like I was stepping on what you made (since a lot of Ghostbur is his past). If we have similar things it’s bc we both big brained and I think that’s iconic.

Au is from this post, you can prompt others at here or my inbox.

Hcs:

So, Ghostbur.

Basically folks instead of happy memories he just keeps bad ones.

What really confused people was his kind of.... confusion at mentions of L’Manberg.

T!Ghostbur isn’t very talkative, he’s more keep to himself type. His guilt sits on him like a weight, he’s bitter and sad and doesn’t know how to stop it.

Despite that, just like Ghostbur. He wants to help others.

It takes awhile for him to voice that, to voice anything really.

He spoke but he never said “I want to help you.” Nor did he ever really make any firm beliefs. He scoffed at mentions of Shlatt and disappeared and came back with stacks of wood to give Tubbo. And when everyone was asleep he spent the night building.

He showed his intentions in very small ways, he saw the world he hated, the one he exploded and discarded and he saw the new President be so insistent to pick the nation he found so hard to remember up from the dust. And he wanted to help.

He was still upset. He was upset that Tubbo cared so much. He didn’t understand, told him himself that.

They got in a small argument, it was the most Tubbo had heard him say at once in awhile. There was a flash of fear in his eye when t!Ghostbur got animated and started yelling. “L’Manberg is nothing but a mark on the world that shows how bad I was, how bad I can be! I had one thing Tubbo, one thing! Couldnt even take care of it! Made it with my own two hands and yet the world said I couldn’t take care of it with those same hands and I blew it up for that! That nation. THIS nation is but a reflections of my mistakes! A constant reminder of what I failed to be— of someone I hate that I was!”

“Well... I’m sorry Wilbur but that’s exactly why I like it.” And that’s more awkward then how Tubbo wanted it to come out and the look from t!Ghostbur encouraged him to speak again. “It’s.... you.... did you really forget? Wilbur, we made... I joined your side. L’Manberg’s side after I had stood and watched you sit in the hto dog van. After I reimbursed you for the hassle and saw you killed for singing clown music at Sapnap and the others. I joined after you.... you showed me that the Americans weren’t running things right. I joined after you guys had came into my house and stolen anything to make drugs, and then the next day or so I gave you guys everything I had so we could make more. I didn’t leave when Eret did, nor did I sell out like Manifold had. I knew I could never leave the moment you wrote ‘suck it green boy’ to the sky because I didn’t know if I had ever laughed that hard or felt that happy. And I haven’t left.”

Things are softer between them after that. Wilbur doesn’t remember a lot of what he’s saying, though he remembers reading that book and declining having it in his possession. But he believes Tubbo, and he helps him more afterwards in his small ways that are attempting to be big.

When Tommy got exiled he didn’t have much to say, he just tagged along and helped make him a home. Set him up. He knew Tubbo would rather that he was helping Tommy but knew the other boy couldnt.

After that he kept eyes on both of them, though mostly Tubbo since it was quite easier. Helping him out with what he could, hanging out with his dad in silence. Helping Eret with the museum.

There’s a lot of hatred in his heart, especially towards Eret. But he pushes past it often. Not to find light but to just find some ease. Almost of his energy goes into keeping his feelings in check, though he has dark grey dye he carries around that helps.

One time he ran out of translucent dye to help manage his bitterness and it caused.... quite the scene.

Nothing exploded this time but there was a fight with a handful of people.

Fundy is. Hurt by t!Ghostbur. The last thing Ghostbur fully remembers of Fundy is him taking down the walls.

Tommy gets pissed at t!Ghostbur in exile because he’s such a fucking downer. Eventually tells him to never come back despite Ghostbur having made a home there.

Niki avoids him at all costs.

Eret.... kinda just watches him around. Doesnt really know how to interact. Him and Tubbo are the ones who put the pieces together that Ghostbur only remembers bad things so he’s hesitant to interact and makes their interactions sparse just in case.

Eret has spent most of his time since his betrayal trying to get forgiveness and redeem himself so its hard knowing t!Ghostbur will only ever know him for the worst thing he ever did.

Ghostbur’s sewer still has drugs in it, instead of a library it has blocks of old buildings and he labels them accordingly. He helps Eret with blocks that would be replica’s vs. authentics but sometimes they have to call Tubbo in since he had a clearer mind about it.

Those moments are hard because it’s three of the original four people who founded L’Manberg all attempting to remember it’s history. To t!Ghostbur its like hitting his head against a wall over and over in attempts to remember anything. He’s on the brink of good memories, it always feels strange when he does but he can’t quite reach him and that gives him a special kind of pain.

I hope I did. Literally any of this justice,,, it’s such a heavy au tbh and there’s so much you can explore with it. I genuinely do like the idea of him having generally translucent dye that takes up his feelings, I didn’t come in meaning to put in grey dye but it just worked. Because for canon Ghostbur it’s an act of avoidance, but for t!Ghostbur it’s an act of care and self control. I’ve really enjoyed this like. God. This is sm personally, thank u for sending it in dhdhhdhdb

8/9 translucent emotion controlling dye.

#ghostbur #wilbur soot #villain wilbur #tommyinnit #tubbo #eret #fundy #exile arc #president tubbo #dsmp #Dream smp #mod caden #my writing #hcs #ask game #cinnamonrollorder

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jessamine--lovelace · 3 years

Text

i have nowhere else to put these so here. grishaverse au where the darkling is a woman and Alina is a closeted lesbian

they’re all queer idc

edit: this is zoyalina btw even if it doesn't seem so from the beginning

aleksandra morozova was raised amongst so much misoginy and prejudice against grisha that she wanted to gain power and make a good life for everyone like her clearly she got lost along the way lol

anyway. Alina and mal are still bffs gay lesbian alliance

mal has a comp het crush on alina and Alina on him, they get over it quickly tho

Alina is taken to the little palace, she gets an immediate crush on the darkling clearly she thinks Zoya is hot, but just admires from afar bc she s so mean and cold

the darkling is even hotter as a woman u can't change my mind

everything goes mostly like canon, the darkling seduces alina and alina is all about worshipping this powerful woman who wants to give her power. she helps alina realise she likes women, manipulates her in the process, makes her think that the darkling is the only one who could offer her security and other bullshit

the night that baghra tells alina the truth about the darkling’s plan, zoya is waiting alina at her door because she wants to confront her about how she fall out of the darkling’s good grace because of her idk. and baghra finds them both in alina’s rooms so she makes both of them leave, zoya helping alina to get lost in the country baghra makes up a lie about how zoya went to visit her family/is in a mission so no one suspects zoya is a “traitor” except the darkling and genya who know the truth

mal is still looking for alina but he doesn't know Zoya is with her so it's a big surprise when he finds them both huddled up in a big coat together, freezing their asses off, zoya bitching about how alina better be grateful that she s helping to save her glowstick ass

Zoya calls mal alina s boyfriend exactly once before both mal and alina strongly let her know their disgust to that idea

so yeah Zoya is a bit weirded out bc they are so close to each other and yet they're not together??? but she is kinda starting to get along with alina and maybe she s not so bad, and just maybe she starts to like her

they find the stag blabla Zoya is taken back to the little palace while Alina and mal are taken to expand the fold or whatever the darkling has in mind

alina and mal escape and run off as in canon, except they pose as siblings in novyi zem. Mal finds a cute boy there and develops a crush but he s too devoted to keeping alina safe to risk getting into any relationship

Alina doesn't agree and makes him go on a date with the dude before everything goes to shit

the darkling comes back, takes them, Nikolai happens etc.

as soon as Nikolai gets them back in ravka, he tries to woo alina and propose to her like in canon. she s not really out yet tho she s not ready for it, not even Mal knows yet even if he suspects something from their time spend with zoya and the looks alina gave her, and the hurt look she has whenever the darkling is mentioned/she explains what the deal is with her evil plan, but he lets her take her time

Nikolai is all about flirting to the sun summoner and she s nice about it, polite, but clearly trying to get away because she s lowkey uncomfortable. declines his marriage proposal, and nikolai thinks it's because of Mal but he s wrong. mal tries to have a talk with alina about this, but alina panicks and says “he seems like your type, not mine” and mal is lost like ?? he s a prince?? and probably straight?? and he asked YOU to marry him??

and alina realises she is tired to keep this up, so she tells mal about her liking women. mal hugs her and she confesses that the darkling helped her come to terms with it in a way, and it messed with her and she feels shame that she fell for the manipulation

so when they're on the way to os alta, and Nikolai kisses her for the public, she just says "I like girls please never do that again or I'll use the cut on your face." as soon as they are alone in their couch and Nikolai is stunned and apologises to her a lot of shit starts to make sense for nikolai now lol

so after that tiny incident, Nikolai knows it's pointless to pursue Alina so he only keeps up his show for the public and becomes really good friends with alina and mal

nikolai would still very much like that political alliance and he sometimes jokingly tells alina “you’ll have lots of women at your feet if you become queen. aren’t you interested in that?” and alina is just done with his ass

clearly nikolai and mal hook up at some point and it's kinda awkward afterwards bc they both have a bit of a crush on each other but don't want to admit it Alina is amused

so they go back to os alta, and Zoya is there!!! and Alina literally hugs her bc she was so worried and she missed her and "I shouldn't have let her take you away, I'm so sorry I left you behind zoya" and Zoya is so surprised she doesn't respond to the hug for a while before crushing alina in a tight embrace without saying anything

everyone is a bit shocked bc Zoya is hugging Alina?? since when are they getting along??? what is happening???

they have a talk when they are alone and zoya tells alina about her aunt and how she doesn’t blame alina for what the darkling did, alina tells her about the second amplifier. they hug again and maybe some tears are spilled but that’s between them and no one has to know

they prepare and train and alina and zoya get closer and closer. mal, being the captain to alina’s guard, kinda has to stick around with her when she meets with nikolai and it’s awkward and their conversations aren’t as lively as they used to be and it lowkey breaks alina’s heart a bit and annoys her until she explodes one day when she s alone with a miserable looking mal waiting for nikolai to appear at a meeting “saints mal just talk to him”

and mal being mal just straightens his back and ignores her like a stubborn idiot which infuriates alina she totally tries to annoy him by reflecting some light into his eyes

“i know something happened on the road between you two. you’re both acting weird. would it kill you to talk to him?” but mal doesn’t get to answer because nikolai is walking in talking about some plan, totally oblivious to what is happening. Later, after the meeting is over, alina gets nikolai alone and tries to talk to him, but he s just as stubborn as mal and tells her that there’s nothing to be done bc mal avoids him everytime he manages to get near him and got the message “my ego can’t handle another rejection”

therefore alina finds herself in need to fix this thing between nikolai and mal because the tension is getting on her nerves and she is stressed enough as it is with everything going on

little side note, the darkling still comes to her in visions and she thinks she is going insane before she starts talking to zoya about it and zoya takes in the habit of spending the evenings in alina’s rooms, both of them searching in books for more information about the amplifiers or sometimes talking. zoya isn’t soft and she never will be, but alina likes that. a lot. ANYWAY zoya is the one to come up with the plan to somehow lock nikolai and mal in a room together. they get tolya and tamar in on it too.

alina makes sure she sets up a meeting with nikolai under a false pretext when mal is on watch. alina and mal arrive first and as soon as nikolai enters she gets up “oh saints i left the book in my rooms” and leaves before mal or nikolai can react. and then one of the twins closes the door and they can hear it being locked and then alina’s voice from the other side “we’ll let you out after you have a talk. the tension between you two is getting insufferable”

they talk and sort things out a bit. everything gets less stressful for everyone

one night the darkling comes to alina, and zoya is about to leave. alina freezes because it’s not the darkling she sees, but zoya “she’ll never want you. i am the only one who can love you, who understands you.” it’s the darkling’s voice and alina can’t move, can’t breathe, just stares at the darkling as she takes back her own face. zoya can only see alina’s face getting paler and her expression more terrified even as the darkling disappears

zoya tries to shake alina, calls out her name, but alina just looks at her with such a sad expression that it unsettles zoya even more. “she’s right” alina whispers, barely audible, over and over again

“what did she tell you?! alina you can’t listen to her! she lies. she manipulates everyone, you can’t believe anything she says. it’s not the truth. anything she tells you”

alina shakes her head “you’ll never- i’m such an idiot.” tears are welling up in her eyes

“i’ll never what?” “want me”

and zoya freezes, just staring at alina, shocked. alina takes it wrong, she tries to put space between them, tries to run in embarassment, but zoya catches her hands, holds her still and looks into alina’s eyes. alina can’t look her in the eyes, can’t seem to find it in her to do it. “you really are an idiot if you think i would just spend my evenings and risk my ass for just any friend” and then she cups alina’s face in her palms and she kisses her.

alina is so surprised she doesn’t respond to the kiss for a second, but then she kisses zoya back and they both just melt into each other. zoya feels a tear run down alina’s face, into her cheek and breaks away with a “don’t go soft on me now starkov” and alina laughs through her tears and goes to kiss zoya again just because she can.

wow this turned out way longer than i intended, but damn did it give me serotonin coming up with it. i just want to say that, if the darkling was a woman, the character would be more hated, but sexier and i’m alright with that. also everyone is queer because i said so. i have more zoyalina headcanons that i’ll probably post bc now i’m investedTM so come and shout about them to me i won’t mind

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ghostiewriter · 3 years

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67/76 for hurt! Kiara and protective! JJ

OKAY SO😂I couldn’t decide between ansgty or goofy so I kinda mixed them, more towards the goofy side though since I have a few angsty prompts coming up! But yes, hope you enjoy! This does mention blood and injuries, just an fyi to people!

Word Count: 1.8K

Prompts: “I’m afraid.” // “I think you need stitches.”

This was supposed to be their chill day.

The day that was reserved for just them. No pogues, no adventures, no crazy ass plans. Just JJ and Kie.

Some may even call it their date day—although according to Sarah, hanging out and getting high does not count as a date. The couple were inclined to agree, these days weren’t a new occurrence. It was often how they spent their days together even before they officially became a couple, except now there was the odd make out session sprinkled throughout and far cheesier flirtation banter. But it was still their day and they cherished it.

The plan was simple enough. Kie had packed some food from the restaurant and grabbed a couple of beers, JJ was in charge of getting some decent joints from his cousin and the two of them would take the Pogue out for the day. It was probably the most romantic you’d ever see the couple get.

They had taken the boat down south along the coastline, it wasn’t very explored in terms of how often the pogues ventured down there but JJ was feeling a bit adventurous. Plus Kie had no arguments as she happily sat back and watched JJ steer, one hand resting on the metal framing in such as casual way whilst the other was on the wheel, but the brunette found herself quite happily distracted by the straining back muscles that were in her line of sight—his tank long abandoned somewhere with the sundress she had slipped on over her bikini for the ten minute drive from her house to the Chateau.

Maybe if either of them had taken a few moments to think about the area they had anchored in or even glanced at a map, the whole situation could have been avoided. So in hindsight, maybe it was slightly their fault for being so reckless. However, Kie was more inclined to blaming the bastards that dump whatever trash they wanted into the ocean, not only because of the harm it caused to the wildlife but apparently humans too.

A couple of beers in, JJ was tugging on her hand to drag her up from her seat as he terribly danced along to the music blasting from the speaker they had brought with them. “C’mon, stop being a bore!” He whined childishly as she begrudgingly got up.

“I’m not being a bore,” She laughed, letting herself sway a little to keep him happy as he continued to mouth the words to ‘Gimme! Gimme! Gimme!’ that was currently playing. “I was enjoying the show.”

“Hm, it doesn’t come for free, ya know.” He murmured as he puckered his lips, making little kissy noises until she finally gave in. And Kie had assumed that would be enough for him, that she could happily indulge in some of the crabsticks she brought. But in true unpredictable JJ fashion, he was throwing her over his shoulder without a warning. Kie squealed, her nails digging slightly into his back so she didn’t flip over.

“JJ, what the hell!” She exclaimed, but the giggles escaping her lips told him that she wasn’t really mad.

“Thought you’d appreciate the view.” JJ replied as he lightly spun around, a grin etched on his face when he heard her laugh harder.

“I don’t know,” She said, staring down at his ass. “I’ve seen better.”

“Oh, you’re going to regret that, Carrera.” He warned.

“I’m afraid,” She giggled back. “Not one of JJ Maybank’s notorious empty threats!”

“Have I told you how hot you look today, Kie?” He asked suddenly in an oddly innocent and un-JJ like way.

“Like I need you to tell me, I know I look great.” She sassed back, letting out a small gasp when she felt him slap her ass. She could practically hear the smirk on his face.

“I think you need to cool down a little.” He retorted, already making his way towards the stern of the boat. Her eyes widened slightly as she tried her best to hold onto him.

“JJ, DON’T YOU DA—AHHH!”

By the time she surfaced, she could already hear JJ’s laughs. She ran her hands through her hair, pushing it out of her face as she looked up at the blond with a glare. He was grinning innocently back at her.

“You look cool in there.” He snickered.

“You’re an ass.” She called back, moving her arms in gentle circles to keep herself afloat.

“Ah, but I’m your ass.” He grinned back and she didn’t disagree. Eventually, she had managed to convince him to come in with her—of course the asshole canon-balled in—the water actually feeling great against the midday heat.

They tried not to venture too far from the boat, although that wasn’t a problem when they realised quickly that most of the surrounding area was just marshy and not great for swimming.

“God, this feels horrible.” Kiara muttered as she glanced down, as though she would actually be able to see much. Still, didn’t stop her from trying.

“I kinda like it,” JJ spoke up, seeming to enjoy himself despite Kiara’s constant requests to head back to the Pogue. “Feels like I’m walking on a marshmallow.” He added nonchalantly.

“Congratulations, your eight year old self’s dream came true,” She commented with a small chuckle, almost as if she was imagining young JJ with his horribly done buzzcut. “Now can we please head back? I’m fucking starving.”

“Geez, you get cranky when you’re hungry.” He teased, promptly avoiding the splash that she had directed his way. He only cackled, yelling that the last one to make it to the boat gets a warm beer before he got his head-start back.

Kie only laughed, calling him a cheater as she followed suit. Except getting out of the marsh was a little harder that she assumed, kicking her feet and swearing under her breath whenever she got stuck again.

She felt a nip—or maybe it was more than a nip but the adrenaline of the competition was coursing through her—and when she went to kick her leg free once again, she felt a sharp pain run up her leg. Kiara didn’t even remember screaming until JJ was on his way back, eyes wide in concern.

“Kie, what’s wrong? What happened?” His eyes glazed over her as though he was trying to see the cause of her scream.

“M-My leg.” She whimpered, feeling her eyes well up with tears as she tried to free her leg once again, only to feel another shot of pain.

“Jellyfish?” He asked but she simply shook her head. “Okay, let’s get you back to the boat.” He murmured, heart racing when he saw some red residue on his hand after he helped her tug her leg free.

It was a hassle but JJ didn’t care, his first priority was getting Kie back somewhere safe and right now, that was the boat. He helped her up before he pulled himself onboard, his eyes falling onto her leg.

His eyes widened when he saw the massive cut on her leg, the lower half of her left leg covered in blood. He could feel his throat closing up, mind racing and hands shaking. Everything around him seemed to drown out as he stared at her leg, and it wasn’t until she felt her tugging his hand and calling his name that he seemed to snap out whatever trance he was in.

“Right, sorry!” He quipped before he grabbed a towel and placed it down on the seats before gently lifting her on top of it. He then disappeared to grab the first-aid kit they kept on board, but Kie didn’t miss the way his hands were a little shaky when he placed it down beside her, fingers fiddling as he attempted to open the box.

She won’t lie, the salt water made it sting like a bitch. It hurt and she probably should’ve been more alarmed at the amount of blood dripping down her leg, but she had never seen JJ so shaken up. She didn’t peg him as the squeamish type, so she couldn’t really understand what’s got him so freaked out.

“Jay…” She whispered softly, placing her hands over his. He finally looked up at her, sniffling slightly and it was then she noticed how red his eyes looked—though she wasn’t sure if that was because he was crying (or trying his hardest not to) or if he had just gotten some salt water in his eyes—but either way, she hated the broken look on his face.

“I-I’m sorry, I should’ve listened to you when you said we should head back.” He began to ramble, not seeming to have control over his words. “I shouldn’t have even thrown you in the water in the first place!”

“JJ, it’s okay.” She whispered, turning her body to face him as much as she could without moving her leg. “This isn’t your fault.”

“I’m still sorry—”

“Nope, no more apologising.” She scolded lightly, giving him a small—and hopefully comforting—smile. “C’mon, Doc, fix me up.” She added, nudging his shoulder a little. She relaxed a little when she saw the small smile on his face.

“Dr Maybank to your rescue.” He huffed out as he opened up the first aid kit, grabbing some wipes before he gently began to clean the wound and surrounding area. She watched him carefully, lip tugged between her teeth to contain her winces. She noticed the little crease between his eyebrows as he focused at the task at hand. If she didn’t feel a shooting pain down her leg every time he even touched it, she would’ve basked in the adorable scene of focused JJ.

“I think you need stiches.” JJ spoke up, staring at her wound with a thoughtful face.

She looked down at her leg, trying not to wince. It was a clean cut, probably from some broken glass hidden in the marsh. And it was deep, but Kiara didn’t think it was stitch-level deep.

“You’re being overdramatic, just need to wrap it up and dose myself up on some paracetamol.” Kie said with a roll of her eyes.

“Hey, I watched Grey’s Anatomy with Pope,” JJ said, hands on his hips as he looked between Kie and her leg. “I think that makes me pretty qualified to say that you need stitches.”

“You watched one episode, dumbass.” She scoffed. “Just drive back, I don’t need you performing amateur surgery on my knee.”

Except it had taken at least fifteen minutes before Kie finally convinced JJ that she was comfortable and fine and that he could stop fussing over her. He only narrowed his eyes at her before pressing a kiss to her forehead and handing her a joint, saying it would help with the pain.

“You know, it’s kinda cute.” Kie called out, moving her eyes away from the passing scenery as she looked at JJ from over her shoulder.

“What is?” He asked.

“Your little protective mama bear side.” She said with a snicker. JJ rolled his eyes in response, but there was a smile on his lips.

“Well excuse me for being a caring boyfriend.” He huffed out.

“I said it was cute!”

“Yeah, yeah! Whatever!”

“Uh oh, mama’s mad.”

#jiara #outer banks #obx #jiara prompts #writing prompts #my writing

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roz-ani · 3 years

Text

Okay, so first: I am so sorry it took me so long to respond, dear anon. I was really busy with school. Not to mention Tumblr wasn't kind enough to put this in my ask box, but I fortunately took the screenshot the day I received the message, while it got lost in all the other notifications.

Now, properly responding to your ask would require me to write a looonnngggg analysis. I have absolutely nothing against Bumbleby or Blacksun. In fact, I feel indifferent about both. I did say once I ship BS, but it kinda... disappeared? I think around V5. I'm not even sure what to think about Bumbleby at this point. I do feel like something is missing there, but I also don't think Blacksun should've become canon? Like I said, I haven't formed my opinion on the matter, but I'll try to explain it as good as I can while hoping to not write a novel XD

In volumes 1-3 we witnessed how friendship between Blake and Yang formed. After leaving Adam, Blake needed someone who would focus on positives, make her feel comfortable and offer emotional support. She found that in team RWBY. Did she form any special connection with Yang then?

I think this moment is one of the most important ones in their whole relationship. Yang told Blake she can't focus on fighting all the time - she has to rest too, with her friends by her side. She even winked at her, but I don't see it as something romantic. I'd connect it to Yang's playful personality.

After that, we didn't see anything really important. There were a few smaller moments between them, usually shared with Ruby and Weiss. Until the Fall of Beacon:

I've noticed many people pointing this out as the first evidence of Yang's feeling for Blake. For me it doesn't really make sense. I'm 100% sure her reaction wouldn't change if it was Weiss, not to mention Ruby.

After that, Yang expressed how disappointed and crushed she felt when Blake left. She obviously didn't blame her partner for what happened, but she was trying to protect her at that moment, she heard how she screamed after Adam hurt her. But Blake felt guilty and went to the only people she had left in her life - her parents. Sun travelled there with her, therefore they logically had to spend more time together. More one that later.

Now, them missing each other is understandable, but were they really that close? Yang wanted Blake to be with her. It was not the first time someone left her, when someone didn't give enough support after something tragic happened. Many people saw it as something romantic. I didn't. Weiss explained Blake's way of thinking to Yang and Sun did the same for Blake. However, many interpreted that longing as more than friendship. I honestly don't blame them. It really felt like they tried to work with something that... just wasn't there. Now, it all seems to come back to the moment when Yang lost her arm and Blake left her. And that's the thing that probably confuses me the most, so let's just leave it here and move on.

Volume 6, oh sweet, sweet volume 6. We started with Yang still being uneasy around Blake... for a moment. She said it'll take time for things to be normal again, but what mattered the most was the fact her partner came back. On the Brunswick farm Blake tried to show her support by promising Yang she'll protect her - Yang obviously wasn't happy with that. The audience received an information that there's still a problem, something's wrong... but then they started to talk normally again. Now, there were more important things to focus on, but it felt like the whole issue disappeared, it went absolutely nowhere. Then we got the fight with Adam. My biggest problem is his line "What does she even see in you?". It's really, really difficult, if not impossible, to not see it as something connected to love/romance. Would he say the same thing if it was Weiss not Yang?

After that we got the hug and hand holding. Was it romantic? Pretty much yes. Saying that the Renora airship scene from v4 was intimate, but this one wasn't seems kinda unfair to me. But why? Why was it romantic? What lead to those feelings? Where did they come from? There had to be something in v6. If we accepted the fact them missing each other was completely platonic then why it would suddenly become romantic?

Now, Blacksun. The first time we met Sun he immediately found Blake interesting and knew about her being a Faunus.

And while he might’ve been a bit “insistent”, he kept supporting Blake while trying to get closer to her. It’s obvious he was the one initiating something, like inviting her to the dance. Then we got this:

Now, blushes are something that can be interpreted in a few ways, mainly embarrassment or something more romantic. I think we can all agree it’s the second option. Again: why? When did Blake start to see Sun as someone she could possibly date? We obviously skipped some school weeks in the story, so it’s possible that they just spent more time with each other. Still, there wasn’t much we could pick to support this. At the same time it was more than what Blake had with Yang at this moment. While Sun became someone she started to develop feelings for, Yang remained her close friend.

Then came the Fall of Beacon. Blake ran away and Sun went after her. He felt like he couldn’t leave her alone, she needed support. Like I said, Sun can be insistent, but he’s still a great friend. The only time he acted like he was flirting with her was when he called her “his hero��. After that he kept being supportive, help her solve the White Fang problem etc. Blake on the other hand was constantly saying she doesn’t want his help and that she came here to rest. If there was any romantic development from v3 left, they both knew it wasn’t the right time for it. After Sun got hurt, Blake revealed why she ran away, why she didn’t want her friend to get close to her. She viewed herself as the source of their problems, wanted to be hated. Sun explained to her why her mindset isn’t healthy.

He even knew Blake kept thinking about Yang.

Oh, I almost forgot about the parents thing XD It’s obviously an old scenario: overprotective father and supportive mother meeting their daughter’s boy-friend. It’s always connected to romance between two young people, so I don’t blame Blacksun shippers for pointing it out. After that, we didn’t get much between the two. They focused on their mission, Sun kept supporting Blake in her fight. I v6 Blake expressed how much she'll miss him and kissed him goodbye. Sun told Neptune it was never about romance and it’s true to some degree. I’m sure he’d go after her even if he wasn’t in love. Sun is an amazing friend. He has his flaws, but you can’t deny his loyalty.

Okay, I skipped a few things here and there, but there’s still something I want to point out: the audience perspective. I think it’s safe to assume that Blacksun was more obvious choice. Does that mean Bumbleby never had a chance? Absolutely not. It’s not about whether it was planned from the beginning or not. It’s about buildup. When Blake and Yang got separated it was obvious they’re going to reunite. I wasn’t part of the FNDM during v4, so I assume people expected Blacksun to become canon during v4-5. I think it was still important to remember the fact of Blake and Yang reuniting in the future, which would obviously be crucial for their relationship. I also believe it was pretty obvious Sun wouldn’t stay with the group, so Blacksun would have to be confirmed later. I think the biggest problem with Bumbleby people seem to have is how obvious it is now. We all know it’s going to be canon, some even say it’s canon now. It does make sense since it’s inevitable at this point. But let’s look at this:

It seems like they’re trying to make up for what was lost in the previous volumes. Bumbleby technically isn’t canon yet. Blake and Yang seem to be fully aware of their feelings, it’s just a matter of time before they confess. Now, that may annoy some people, because we all already know it’s the endgame. At least that’s how I see it.

Now, which ship had more buildup? It’s honestly hard to say. Just because two characters shared more scenes together it doesn’t mean the ship is going to be canon. You have to look at the context. It’s also important to not have those characters be together all the time. It gets boring and annoying. Sadly, RWBY likes to do that (although v8 is doing a great job so far). I think both ships would need more time to be properly built up. Now Bumbleby is basically canon. The ship has its flaws when it comes to writing, but it’s not something that can be changed.

#rwby #bumbleby #blacksun #yang xiao long #blake belladonna #sun wukong #anon ask #roz writes #mine

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undertalethingems · 4 years

Text

Bark at the Moon, Chapter 2: Reconnections, Recollections

Or read on my Ao3>

Rating, Setting: Gen, Pre-canon

Chapter Warnings: None

Chapter Summary: Sans is at a loss for what to do. He's lucky his brother isn't the only one who looks out for him, and that he's not the only one looking out for Papyrus... But they both have a lot of work ahead of them.

It had been two weeks. Two long, empty, lonely weeks. Sans hadn’t given up on his brother, per se, but he had given up on looking for him. A check on the numbers revealed nothing out of the ordinary; as far as he could tell, Papyrus was definitely still alive, and there was nothing funky with the timeline. More mundane sources of information continued to come up dry, and the few times Sans had gone out, there was a subtle unease in town. If only Papyrus knew his neighbors missed him... not to mention his own brother. It was like he'd vanished into thin air, and Sans knew that was one thing his brother couldn't do. So he was just... gone.

Sans was starting to feel he'd messed up somehow. He knew he was far from being a perfect or even a really good brother, but he didn’t think he’d done anything to make Papyrus feel running away was necessary…. No, Papyrus would have aired his grievances long before that, he was sure.... But then again, would he? It's not like Sans ever did anything about all the things he nagged him for. Maybe after feeling unheard for so long, he'd left. A cruel voice in his mind liked to whisper as much and worse, and without Papyrus to motivate him, he wasn't doing much to combat it.

He rolled over on the couch and ignored the empty chip bag that crinkled under him, the remains of lunch. Going to Grillby’s had become too taxing sometime last week, and most other foods were similarly inconvenient if they sounded good at all. He wanted nothing more than for Papyrus to burst in and scold him for being so lazy, but dreams of exactly that and the knowledge none of this mattered anyway had spoiled his hopes. He’d just wait, like he always did. He heaved a sigh, and was letting his eyelids drift down when a knock on his door startled him.

He waited, and it came again--much harder.

“Sans?” Undyne called, her voice only slightly muffled by the door. “Sans, you better be in there. I'm gonna bust this down if you don't answer now!”

Oh boy. He hauled himself up, brushed off the worst of the crumbs, and answered the door. Undyne grimaced as she studied him.

“Oh thank god, but dude, you look awful. I was here to see if you were okay, but, I think I just got my answer. C’mon, you’re not staying inside anymore.”

“eh, i’m not really feeling up to going out,” Sans mumbled, wondering if he looked as tired as he felt. “was kinda hoping you had info on my bro, to be honest, but…”

“Sans, no one’s seen you in three weeks,” Undyne stated.

Sans looked up at her with brows furrowed, questioning.

“i was just at grillby’s like… five days ago,” he protested, but Undyne shook her head.

“Grillby himself called me in on a wellness check. It’s been three. Weeks. Two since Papyrus… disappeared. I… guess you lost track of time, huh?”

Sans wilted--he was missing a whole week. “… it really flies when you’re having fun. sorry you went through all this trouble. tell grillby…. i dunno. tell him i’m ok, i guess.”

“You’re not okay,” Undyne growled, snatching the shoulder of his hoodie. “What if Papyrus came home to find you like this? Or—or worse!? Come on! We’re getting you cleaned up, making you eat some real food, and then we’re going out to look for Papyrus because if this keeps going we’ll lose BOTH of you.”

Sans didn’t have it in him to protest. She... she was right. He let her strongarm him into his own house and into the shower—though she gave him his privacy once she’d turned the water on, and the warmth felt so nice he considered staying in for a few days. But that would mean missing out on food he probably wouldn't be paying for, and he was actually hungry now. He washed up and put on the change of clothes Undyne had left him, and when he did finally emerge he found she’d thrown most of the trash away and there was an open spot on the couch. It was fated to remain empty though as she hooked her arm around his shoulders and marched him out the door.

Grillby’s exploded in shock when the two walked in, and they were swarmed by the regulars trying to greet them. Undyne howled, ordering everyone to give Sans some space, and they were finally able to make their way to the bar. If Sans was honest, part of him didn’t really want to be here, but more of him could admit he’d missed it. His friends were quick to fill him in on the latest gossip and jokes, and he realized they were doing for him what he'd done for them so many times before. They were trying to cheer him up.

After enjoying good company and a meal Grillby had assured him was on the house, at Undyne's urging they headed out to begin the search anew. Sans dreaded reaching the tile puzzle now, knowing it was the last place with any evidence of his brother and yet be such a glaring dead end. He sighed, and nudged some of the freshly accumulated snow with his slipper as Undyne talked on her phone behind him.

“Wait a minute, I’ll ask. Hey Sans,” she spoke, tapping his shoulder. “You remember what day it was that all this started?”

“yeah. it was… tuesday, exactly two—well, three weeks ago,” he answered.

“Thanks! Okay, um… as far as I know, he starts at 6 AM, sharp. Yeah. It would’ve taken him a little while to… okay, gotcha. I’ll hang on.”

There was a long pause. Sans wondered if he really could fall asleep standing up. Odds were looking pretty good. He let his eyelids slip down...

“So… you do see something? Uh-huh… that’s too bad about the lens, but you can confirm there was movement here during our timeframe? Awesome. Well, not awesome, but, you know. Thanks Alphys, you’re the best. Talk to you later.”

“well?”

“Dr. Alphys set up these cameras all over to watch for humans, and as it happens, they caught Papyrus walking over here, but not getting any farther than that. Thanks to that snowstorm, this area’s camera got iced over--of course--but she could see enough to make out… something,” Undyne explained. “Hold on, she’s gonna text me a couple pictures.”

There was a ping, and she studied the images with a frown before holding it out for Sans.

“I dunno. I definitely see something, but, can you make any sense of this?”

Sans took her phone and studied the blurry pictures. He could barely make out the trees in the background, but at least the division between them and the snow-covered ground was clear enough. There wasn’t anything that looked particularly like his brother, but there was a whitish arch of something and a smudge of orange that seemed to dart across the frame. It was a better hint than anything they’d had before, but what was it?

Sans squinted at the pictures—wait, was the arch a spine? And his tired mind dredged up memories he hadn't known he had. A lab. A scientist. Two living weapons, the pinnacle of magical engineering--and an accident that erased nearly all evidence it had ever happened. A hand on his shoulder steadied him, and he looked up to see Undyne giving him a worried look. He handed her phone back wordlessly and shoved his hands into his pockets, magic racing.

“Are you okay? You got kinda… unsteady there for a moment.”

“’m fine,” he answered, well aware his eye lights had blinked out.

“Sans, dude, you’re freaking me out,” Undyne called as he walked away, inspecting the edges of the clearing and peering into the trees.

“can i ask you a favor?”

“Uh… yeah?”

“go pick up the least greasy thing from grillby’s you can and wait here. i know what happened to papyrus,” Sans stated, staring into the depths of the forest. The indents were distant and faint from layers of fresh snowfall, but he could see the pattern now and wondered how he hadn’t noticed them before. No points for him, that was sure.

“Uh, sure thing. See you… both? Soon,” Undyne said, and in a blink he was gone.

The forests outside Snowdin were thick and ancient, and most monsters avoided their depths. It was largely the threat of frostbite and getting lost that kept them away, but save for a few exceptions monsters generally preferred company and civilization to untamed forest anyway. If this was where he’d run, it made sense Papyrus hadn’t been found by anyone.

Sans followed his brother’s tracks—long, bounding marks that only increased in distance from one another as he’d picked up speed—and called his name, hoping the trees and snow wouldn’t simply swallow his muted voice altogether. It got darker, and quieter, and there was a growing sense he was trespassing. If he didn’t have his shortcuts Sans might’ve been afraid of losing his way, but it didn’t matter. Shortcuts or not, he would have kept searching now that he had a lead. Considering what the last four weeks had done to him, who knew what state Papyrus would be in.

He eventually found himself in a wide clearing where fresh snow and gusting winds had swept the tracks clean, and sighed. His trail had gone cold again, and he gave a halfhearted laugh at the pun. Papyrus would have hated it…. What he wouldn’t give to hear his exasperated groans again. He called his brother’s name, and listened to it echo faintly until silence laid heavily over him once more. That was the worst of all—the utter silence of an empty world.

Wood cracked behind him, and Sans whirled, magic flaring in his left socket. A pair of orange rings that almost matched met his gaze, and for a moment it was all he saw before he made out the rest of the entity’s face and body from the surrounding gloom. His magic faded, and he sank to the ground. He wasn’t sure how much time passed as they simply stared at one another, but it had to have been at least five minutes before he found his voice and finally addressed the being watching him.

“papyrus?”

A raspy whine answered, and Sans winced. It was his brother’s voice, but weaker, and wordless. Papyrus had always been so proud to learn new words, but now he wouldn’t say even one. This was bad.

“c’mere bro, let’s get you home, huh?”

Papyrus stared for a while, and Sans tried not to listen to the rising panic in his soul. He'd come when he'd called, he had to remember, had to recognize him, right? Why was he still standing so far away...?

"... bro?"

Finally, Papyrus shook himself out, inhaled, then staunchly shook his head with a huff. He hesitated, but did walk over, head held low as he slowly approached. He paused again, only a few feet away and studying him warily—then sat and curled around himself. Sans eyed him sadly, not liking how faint his eye lights were or that he didn’t want to come home. He thought for a while, then leaned back on his hands with a sigh.

“look… i get it. you don’t want to show off your cool bod, it’d be too awesome for anyone to handle and you can’t bear to do that to someone.”

Something that sounded loosely like “nyeh heh heh” chuffed from Papyrus’ jaws.

“but… it’s been three weeks, bro, goin' on a month. everyone wants to know where you went. uh… i’ve been… even lazier than usual without you. i’ll warn ya now, you’re gonna have some major vacuuming to do.”

An exasperated groan rose from his brother.

“i know, i know. but… bro… you can’t be okay with living like an animal out here. I’M not okay with you living like an animal out here. c'mon, undyne’s waiting for us with food, somethin’ hot from grillby’s, and i specifically asked her to get the least greasy thing she could order 'cause i know how you feel about it. there’s a whole month of mtt shows to catch up on. there’s… bedtime stories, and i can’t afford to slack on those, heh…”

Papyrus gave a shuddering sigh. Sans watched as he stretched out his long forelimbs and turned his palms up, contemplating the digits tipped with slender, deadly claws. Then, he buried his face in the snow and laid his hands across his skull, a picture of despair.

“bro, papyrus, it’s ok. you’re smart, you’ll figure out how to change back,” Sans comforted, reaching out to pat his brother’s head. "you're not gonna let something like this get you down, are ya? c'mon. let's go home.”

Papyrus finally raised his head. He looked so tired as he fixed him with a weary look, and Sans’ soul ached. He could only begin to imagine how his brother had felt out here, by himself in a body that must have stirred up old memories—too many of which were unpleasant. But the light shone in Papyrus’ sockets just a little brighter, and he stood up swiftly, head held high.

And then he fainted.

Sans did his best to appear at his side to catch him, but even if skeletons weren’t heavy monsters Sans was decidedly not in shape and the impact made him stumble. He took a moment to regain his footing, but with his brother limp but in his grasp at last, he removed them from that part of reality and placed them back in the tile puzzle room. Undyne jumped at their sudden appearance and would have probably summoned a spear or two if she weren't already holding a takeout bag. Her eye darted over them, and Sans might’ve laughed at her dumbfounded expression if his brother hadn’t still been unconscious.

“What. The HELL. IS THAT?!” she finally shouted as he laid Papyrus down gently, and he bristled at her harsh words.

“excuse you. THAT happens to be my brother.”

Undyne gestured wildly before finding words to express herself again. “BUT? HOW?? WHAT??!”

Papyrus finally moved, his eyes blinking open, though it took a moment for his irises to reignite. Sans ignored Undyne’s flailing and snatched the takeout from her, sitting near his brother’s head and digging around for whatever awaited in the small paper bag. A few days without food wouldn’t affect a monster’s health much, and certainly not someone with high stats like Papyrus, but nearly a month was another story and he was more than a little worried. He withdrew what turned out to be a toasted turkey club sandwich, mentally thanked both Grillby and Undyne for listening, and helped his brother sit up to finally eat something. It wouldn’t be enough to bring Papyrus’ energy back all the way, but he’d be better off than where he was now by a long shot.

The sandwich was snapped up upon being offered, and after a moment Papyrus felt strong enough to stand on his own. Undyne had settled into just staring at them both skeptically, jaw slack and hands clenching and unclenching as if to summon a spear at any moment. Sans crumpled up the bag and stuck it in his pocket, and looked from his brother to the guard captain with amusement. Papyrus looked nervous—or maybe embarrassed, and his first attempt to speak came out as a gusty hiss. But he stepped back, took a moment, and coughed into his fist to clear his throat.

“Hello, Undyne.”

If Undyne had been dumbfounded before, she was well and truly stunned now. She sank to her knees staring, and Sans couldn’t help but laugh at her. A scream started to croak from her, and he decided it’d be best they all headed back to their house before her yelling attracted attention from the other patrols. He beckoned his brother over, and took Undyne’s wrist as he laid a hand on Papyrus’ shoulder, and in an instant they were in the living room... not a moment too soon.

Undyne screeched at the top of her lungs, reaching a truly impressive volume even Papyrus winced at. Her next instinct was apparently to fight, lunging for her friend as if to throw him over her head. Sans darted out of the way as she sped past, and a soft ping sounded before she was flung sideways into the couch. Papyrus gave his brother a disapproving look, but he gave it right back.

“no fighting in my house,” he said, wagging a teasing finger. “sorry to burst your bubble, undyne, but until papyrus is back at full strength i’m not letting you beat him up.”

“I’M NOT GONNA BEAT HIM UP! I’M JUST GONNA PUNCH HIM FOR BEING DUMB!!!” Undyne roared, leaping from the couch and promptly hauled flat on her face. She growled and pushed herself up, only to fly to the ceiling and stick flat on her back. “Will you QUIT with the BLUE MAGIC?!”

“not unless you stop trying to hit my bro,” Sans countered, and Papyrus laid a hand across his eyes.

“Sans, please put Undyne, who need I remind you is our boss, back on the ground?" he asked, voice still shaky from disuse. "I am quite capable of handling her rigorous expressions of affection, thank you.”

Sans looked over to him and sighed. “you’re right as always bro. i just… i know you’re tough and all, but you’re also not at 100 percent and undyne is pretty intense.”

“YOU BET I AM!”

“plus, i haven’t seen you in basically forever after you disappeared, so forgive me for bein’ a little protective.”

Undyne drifted down at last, and though she glared at Sans she didn’t seem intent on continuing her charge when she landed. Instead, she sat decisively on the couch and folded her arms, fixing them each with a sharp look. “Okay. Here’s what’s going to happen. BOTH of you are going to explain what the HECK is going on with Papyrus, and THEN! We’re getting him something else to eat so we don’t have to treat him like a delicate flower.”

“Flowers are actually quite tough!” Papyrus offered, but shrank under a skeptical glare.

“SO! Who wants to start telling me why or how Papyrus ended up as a… dog-dragon-horse thing?”

The brothers exchanged looks.

“It’s just a skeleton thing, you wouldn’t understand,” Papyrus dismissed. “Most of the time I am the wonderful tall fellow you are familiar with, but if I so wish, I can become… this! It’s a thing.”

“yup, it’s true,” Sans confirmed, but Undyne didn’t look convinced.

“So, you could transform into this awesome creature this whole time… and you never told me?!”

“W-well, you see, I never had reason to bring it up! My usual good looks are more than enough as well as more practical for my day-to-day life, so, I much prefer them. Not to mention I… actually completely forgot how to change. Such things happen even to someone as great as me, tragically…” Papyrus explained, his claws fidgeting, "but it's fine! This is totally a normal thing."

Undyne considered his words and finally relaxed. “Huh. Well, do you… remember how to change back?”

“do you think he would have run away if he did?” Sans shot, and she deflated.

“Right. But, if it’s just something you can do, why’d you hide it? There’s all sorts of monsters out there, no one would even blink at you.”

Papyrus grunted nervously. “Consider that this form is considerably more intimidating, and I, already a sight to behold… Not to mention! I want to be known based on my merits--my wit, my battle prowess, my shockingly handsome bones! Not a silly transformation gimmick that wears off within an hour of playing with it.”

Undyne laughed, a welcome sound after her furious screams. “I guess that’s fair. Wait, if this is a skeleton thing… does this mean Sans can do it too?!”

“nope. even if i could... i'm way too lazy for any shapeshifting shenanigans,” Sans answered lightly. “my bro has the ‘cool werewolf’ gig all to himself.”

“I am not a werewolf!!!” Papyrus cried, stomping his feet as the others chuckled. "I am still, clearly, a skeleton!"

“Alright, well, I guess that’s good enough for me. You dudes need anything, let me know, but now that this is resolved I have work to get back to. Oh yeah… Papyrus, consider figuring out how to change back your new assignment. If you really don’t want to go out looking like that, I figure it’s pretty much top priority. And Sans… you get half watch shifts this week, since you’ll probably have to help Papyrus out with… a lot. Sound good?”

“you know i won’t complain about working less,” Sans teased, and she rolled her eye.

“Yeah, yeah. I’ll see you punks later, okay? Call me if you need anything--it's... really good to have you back, Papyrus.”

Papyrus looked like he didn't know what to say.

She finally left, closing the door behind her. Sans heaved a sigh, and debated whether to make the effort to move to the couch or just sit on the floor. He decided the floor was good enough. Papyrus made a face but sat too, drawing his own deep sigh.

“Well, what are we going to do, brother?”

“i dunno, bro. you need something else to eat, for one. but beyond that… i dunno. mostly… i’m just glad you’re back too.”

“If I am honest, it is good to be back. You weren’t kidding about the vacuuming though, ugh. Did you do anything while I was gone?”

“… i slept.”

Papyrus groaned. “You would. In any case… I am still rather famished. As you can guess, the forest... didn't exactly have grocery stores. Pardon me if I don’t cook fresh spaghetti for us, I’m sure you’ve missed it terribly.”

“more than i thought i could,” Sans laughed, and it was true. It had never been the flavor that was enjoyable about Papyrus’ cooking.

Sans proposed various techniques for Papyrus to try changing back over dinner, many of which he’d already thought of and attempted. He continued regardless, suggesting progressively ridiculous remedies until Papyrus laughed at him. They curled up on the couch together to watch TV, and Sans was happy to see his brother’s eyes drift closed—Papyrus never seemed to sleep, even when he really needed it.

No doubt he really needed it now.

The next day saw about as much progress, and Papyrus’ happiness fade. Sans tried to ignore the worry growing inside him, but it was clear that the time alone with no success had done a number on Papyrus’ self-confidence. Toss in whatever memories he might’ve relived and no wonder he was having doubts.

Sans watched him pace the living room floor, occasionally sweeping up stray bits of trash he hadn’t noticed before. He was antsy, and judging by the way his tail lashed he was increasingly agitated by the situation. The fact he had to stay inside probably wasn’t helping either.

“you wanna go let off some steam somewhere?” Sans suggested before his brother could start another transit across the carpet, and he startled out of his thoughts.

“Hm? Oh, I’m fine! I just need to think!” he replied, standing stiffly. “The Great Papyrus will not be bested yet!”

“no way, but, i was just thinking you might like to get out before you wear a rut in the floor,” Sans continued, and Papyrus glanced at the carpet. There were a few places where his claws had snagged, and they all aligned perfectly with where he’d been pacing.

“Ah. I see your point. Where could we go? I don’t want anyone to see…”

“i was thinking the woods, middle of nowhere. kinda where you ran away to, but not for another three weeks, heh.”

“That sounds suitable. Alright! We do have a nice house but I can admit it is rather cramped for someone of my stature at this time, so! Take us away, brother!”

Sans obliged, and in an instant they stood in the clearing where they’d reunited only yesterday. Papyrus inhaled deeply and took off running, and Sans happily watched him tear across the field—getting some exercise was just what an active guy like his younger brother needed, and it wasn’t fair to make him stay indoors all the time. He leapt, and rolled, and sprinted through the snow, cackling all the while as he exerted himself. Sans waved to get his attention, then summoned a maze of bones for him to dodge and weave around. Papyrus raced through it flawlessly, and Sans couldn’t help but swell with pride. His brother was so cool.

As he watched, he could almost remember what it was like too.

Something juddered out of sync in his soul, and he froze. Oh no, nope, he was not doing this now or ever again. He shut his eyes and thought about how nice it was to be what he was now, tried to focus on how his soul had felt before something else had awakened within it, and was relieved to feel that foreign sensation die away. The Underground didn’t need two of them running around, and Papyrus had always had an easier time switching forms than he did—even when they both remembered how it all worked. Rubbing the side of his skull, he sat in the snow, and when the magic maze dissipated Papyrus came over to see what was wrong.

“Sans? Are you alright?”

“yep, fine. all those bones wore me out.”

Papyrus made a face. “You really do need to work out more! That was hardly anything compared to what you used to do.”

“yeah, well, that was before i discovered being lazy is the best thing in the world.”

Papyrus groaned. “If I need exercise you do too! Come on, lazybones!”

He was hauled up with a clawed hand and nudged in the back by a toothy snout, and gave an exaggerated groan as he stood. “these legs were not made for running, i’ll have you know.”

“Oh, come on Sans, I know you can do it! Chase me!”

Papyrus dashed off once more, and Sans took a few steps before simply cutting into his brother’s path. The indignant howl he got in return was worth being shoved into the snow, and in retaliation he used a touch of blue magic to bowl his brother over. Papyrus kicked, sending a shower of slush over him, and for a moment they just laughed at one another.

“I suppose I shouldn’t have expected anything else from you,” Papyrus finally said, pushing from the snow. “You have grown to enjoy a much slower pace ever since we… since whatever happened."

“yup, i’m gonna enjoy every moment i get. though, i will say… without you around to push me, i do get… too lazy,” Sans admitted, then sighed. “to be honest bro... it woulda been fine if you’d given me a sign you were okay, a note, anything, but not knowing if you were ever gonna come back... or why you left... well, it was rough. so, uh, i guess what i’m saying is… don’t do that again or i’ll have to ground you.”

Papyrus studied him, then hung his head. “I’m sorry Sans, I know I should have, but… I was. Uncertain.”

It was Sans’ turn to prop himself up and look quizzically at his brother. “about what?”

Papyrus fidgeted under his gaze, clearly considering his words before he continued. “How much do you remember of what happened to us?"

Sans furrowed a brow. "more than i'd like, but less than i should."

“S-so, w-well, when this, happened, I—I didn’t want you to see. I didn’t want anyone to see, but especially not you, because I remembered—I remembered a little of how bad we had it, and if you didn’t remember, I didn’t want to accidentally remind you,” Papyrus explained, digging his claws into the ground. “And then you came and found me, and didn’t care that I was what I am, and I felt like a fool for thinking it was better I had left without a word. I’m sorry, brother.”

Sans leaned back with a soft, bittersweet chuckle. “and here i always kept the fact i remembered anything a secret ‘cause i didn’t want you to worry either. we’re hilarious, a real comedy of errors.”

“Indeed.”

“anyway. the important thing is figuring out how you can change back. i don’t remember a thing about that myself, and obviously neither do you. seems like a thing you just gotta feel.”

“Agreed,” Papyrus huffed. “It used to be so easy! How did we do that? As effortless as the bones we conjure, as natural as breathing! It’s so… so frustrating Sans. I… I don’t want to be this. It’s so easy to just... let my thoughts slip away. And I remember that... they wanted us to lose them, wanted us to... be less of us. And after all I've worked for, I refuse to go back to that!”

"you got this, bro. despite everything that's happened, it's still you."

“I know… It’s hard though. But! Hard things have never discouraged me before! We just have to keep trying no matter how long it takes!”

“you got it,” Sans said, his mood lifting at his brother’s boundless optimism. “you ready to head back home then?”

“I think I’m going to take one more lap! You should try to as well, and no cheating!”

“if i did we’d be here for another hour. you go ahead, i’ll be right here.”

Sans watched him rise and make one last circuit around the clearing, then in a blink they were both back home. Papyrus shook snow from his talons and gave a contented sigh, then sat with a determined look on his face. He puffed out his chest, and Sans knew he was in for one of his brother’s monologues.

“Now that my restlessness has been cured, it! Is time! I can approach the issue of my transformation with a clear head! The simple fact remains that my memory of the technique has been obscured by forces strange and concerning, but! I was able to recall how to turn with the simple triggering of a distant memory of the instruction to do so, so! It stands to reason that a memory of the opposite instruction will have the same effect. Said memories may be distressing and difficult to pinpoint, but! The Great Papyrus has never been one to back down in the face of danger! Nyeheh!”

“nope. like i said bro, you were the bravest one there,” Sans affirmed, sifting through his own tenuous recall of their old lives. “i was never strong enough to do anything, and the... assistants, well... they never spoke up about animal cruelty either. says a lot about them, and none of it’s good.”

Papyrus looked at him sadly. "You know, Sans... I don't think they knew what we really were. With how he was, how could they? I think even he pretended not to sometimes..."

Sans huffed a short sigh. "yeah. think you might be right about that."

“… I wish it all could have been different.”

“me too.”

“But! It’s different now! We’re the determiners of our fates! And I say I will be this beast no longer!” Papyrus declared brightly, banishing the grim mood that had settled in momentarily. Standing proudly, he scrunched his eyes shut and concentrated—to no avail. He sighed, and let his legs slide out from under him until he lay spread-eagle on the carpet.

“i can’t believe i’m seeing my brother lay down on the floor with my own two eyes,” Sans teased, and Papyrus scrambled to rise.

“Nyeh! Do not think for an instant I was being anything remotely close to ‘lazy’ or ‘tired’!” Papyrus refuted, glaring at him with comically bugged eyes. “The effort of trying to overcome my natural inclination for this form simply took some recovering from!”

“so, you were tired,” Sans summarized, earning more disgruntled complaint from his brother. He’d missed this so much.

“Fine! Yes! I required a brief respite,” Papyrus conceded, sitting back on his haunches so he could fold his arms. “If I am honest I am quite tired of this form’s stubbornness! I know I must have been instructed to change many times, but I cannot recall how I managed such a simple task and it! Is! The! Worst! Thing!”

“wow, and that’s pretty bad, since that means it’s even worse than my jokes,” Sans commented, and his brother stamped his forefeet down.

“It is!”

“well, we better get to work then. undyne said this was your new assignment, i can’t believe how much you’ve slacked off on it already.”

“No! Nooooo!” Papyrus howled, clasping his head in his hands.

The banter continued as the brothers worked to recall what had once been a regular part of their lives. Some memories slowly filtered back, hazes of shadows and sharp objects resolving into people with needles and too-bright rooms full of instruments. Long nights that sometimes became days that became nights again, spent alone and shivering in an empty room. Hours of training for a task neither of them really understood, harsh tests of every aspect of their abilities imaginable, pushing them to the limits of their endurance. Fleeting moments of happiness together.

All encouraged and directed by a man whose words could seem kind, but masked a cruel curiosity and an unbending will. They were never meant to have souls or personalities. He was going to ensure his work continued despite those.

But for all these memories, there were still gaps. Black holes that would never divulge the information that had once been there--and considering the nature of what Sans did remember, he couldn't help but feel perhaps that was for the best. But if Papyrus' memory of how to shift back had been engulfed by one of these voids... then he might not ever remember, and have to figure it out all over again. On Sans’ part, he’d at least recalled why he didn’t know the method to change back, and it had nothing to do with a spotty memory.

“AT LEAST IN YOUR OTHER FORM YOU LOOK MORE LIKE A SUCCESS. NEVER TAKE THIS SHAPE AGAIN.”

The words had stung anew, a biting remark on a small, frail body that was useless to a lab that only made weapons. He ought to at least look the part, and wasn't allowed anything else. It was only the third time Sans had taken that smaller form in the lab; from then on, he'd slowly accepted his life as a beast. It was easier that way.

"I think perhaps we've had enough," Papyrus said in a low voice, shaking him out of a flat stare after recalling that particular memory. "Let's take our minds off things for a while!"

Sans was glad to get up and laze in front of the TV as Papyrus reheated leftovers for them both. MTT had something mindless on as usual, and it was just the thing for drowning out painful memories. Papyrus snorted when he noticed his brother had fallen asleep, and busied himself with cleaning up the dishes before rejoining him on the couch to doze himself. It had been a long day, but more were sure to follow. They needed all the rest they could get.

It wasn't going to come easy.

#undertale #undertalethingem writes #gaster blaster au #sans (undertale)#Undyne (undertale)#papyrus (undertale)#bark at the moon fic #in which papyrus is a cryptid XD #a little less angst this chapter but there's still a lot =u=;

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ryttu3k · 3 years

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Already finished Coteries of New York, so on to Shadows of New York! I’ve seen the first bit in an LP, at least, but the bulk of the story will be new. This will have two playthroughs, one for each ending, since at least it has them XD First up - the ‘good’ ending!

Oh dang I like the music.

Julia is a bit on the edgy/cynical side XD

Yeah, she’s got a shit deal :-\ And what’s worse is that it’s all planned out.

Interesting note - at Lodestar, there were shadowy figures in the background, but you could rationalise it as people on the other side of the windows. On the train, you only see the shadowy features, and it’s otherwise empty, so no obvious figures casting them...

I guess if you choose the ‘don’t shoot’ option, Julia gets drained and it’s an early game over?

God that Embrace scene is intense. I got goosebumps!

Spirits, huh? Oh yeah, Obtenebration became Oblivion and is now connected with necromancy, IIRC?

I’m glad she had a good few nights XD;;

Valerie Duval, she was... the scourge in CoNY hunting down the Red Hook killer?

Nice to meet you, ‘Katherine Wiese’ XD

Cool ponytail, Qadir! I really dig the relationship between him and Julia, it’s fun. ‘sup Aisling, how’s Agathon? A blood hunt, really? Y O U. Okay yeah probably better for Julia’s long-term survival for Arturo to ignore her XD;; Samira’s so pretty. Ooh this guy is Hope’s sire, yeah?

“You wanted to hear about which member of New York City's Camarilla I dislike the most?"

"Yes?"

"Too bad. They're all my dear colleagues, and I deeply respect every single one of them."

"Sure you do. Wouldn't want to blurt out something that could lock you out of Mr Vanderweyden's legal services, would you, you ass-kisser?"

"I do expect to find myself in need of a good defense attorney when my broke, incompetent, and foul-mouthed assistant finally pushes me over the edge."

THEMST.

Benoit hi!! “Got any news about Sophie Langley?” *sharp intake of breath* Benoit backstory, that’s rad. I wonder if it’ll be uncovered in-game? Like we know Arturo is still around, Panhard is still around. Presumably Adelaide Davis is still around. Callihan... well, I know what happens to him. I think Torque ditches the scene before Sophie dies?

Father Leonard seems like a good sort. I wonder what his deal is?

Dakota is adorable. I’m going to do the ‘good’ end first even though I know it’ll make me feel horrible, but dangit, the ‘bad’ end is totally going to be my canon.

...Vin Diesel? XD

DING DONG THE DOUCHE IS DEAD. ...Deader than usual, I mean.

jfc Panhard that is pretentious as hell. Both the party description and the costume, actually XD Qadir’s mask is kind of funky. Oh my god Arturo you are a Toreador is that the best you can come up with?! Nice horns, Aisling.

...Thought, given their clans, Samira/Aisling could be interesting as hell.

Man, Arturo and Panhard must be pissed off XD Unless they’ve already picked their replacement stooge?

And here’s where the plot starts! Hey, isn’t that the priest’s house? Ohh, they’re meant to be meeting with Mia. I guess they’re just reusing assets.

“It’s a list of four names. ‘D’Angelo. Hope. Agathon. Tamika.’“ *SHARP INTAKE OF BREATH* Okay, that could be the list Sophie gave the fledgling. Which one did Callihan get it from?

Oh criminy Dakota don’t tell me you’re into that Q-Anon shit XD;; Ooh okay that makes more sense. Neat.

Ahhh man I was hoping to get a lead and instead Julia has to punish this poor fuck XD;; Yeesh. Okay, Bunny as a Reporter it is, then.

Almost run over by a limo, huh? *chinstroke*

Oooh this is the lead to Hope! Yeah, I’d say she has a connection with a Montgomery XD Wonder if she did end up eating her? Huh, contact used LeakyGutSyndrome... didn’t Hope end up having to retire that one, or was it the other one? Let’s just... Dominate this guy. Sorry dude it’s for your own good.

Agathon’s missing? :( Damn, he’s like one of the only decent Tremere. Oho, a diary! Oh sweetheart :( Oh, Silvia died :( Damn, interesting past, though... and a reference to CoNY again.

Fucking shadows, I literally glanced over my shoulder.

S C H E M E S. And yeah, looks like I’m on my way to the ‘good’ end :-\

Oh shit, Adelaide or.... whatshisname, Kaiser’s dude? Oooh man who to meet first... Kaiser’s dude. Oh. That was a bit anticlimactic XD

On to see Hope at Double Spiral. I think this is one of those choices that leads to one of the endings, so what’s more ruthless and Camarilla... busting in it is.

Nastya isn’t having a good night, is she XD;; Also Hope’s suit is badass.

...huh. Sounds like she’s actually managed to get shit sorted decently XD

Interesting... the coterie members were a list of heroes for hire that multiple people had, including Sophie. Well, that widens the scope a bit! Anonymous information broker, shall I assume that’s Kaiser? OH. No, it’s her sire!

“The story going around is, he left me alone and I hate his guts. Well, at least half of that is true.” Which half, though...

Aww man I wish I had saved some of those websites! I miss SciFiVine...

You know, I’m not 100% sure Carter’s the murderer (my main suspect is Arturo at this point tbh) but damn, the bit about Stern’s show kinda makes me want to slap him anyway XD;;

Queer Catholic blues, huh :-\

“Haven’t you noticed what’s going on in the news? People are going absolutely insane about this virus, cancelling trips and orders and --” Ahh. We’re in that 2020 XD;;

Okay the scene with the kid meeting his girlfriend was cute but then spooky time?? jfc was that the Abyss?!

Ooooh did she just find Tamika solely by accident? Thanks, Abyss XD I love how Julia’s first response is ‘shit, she’s hot’. And she took out a whole SI squad herself? Nice. Calebros mention! Huh, so the SI are maintaining the status quo... they became an issue because the Camarilla tried to sic them on the Anarchs and Sabbat and it backfired, maybe it actually succeeded here?

Ooh, a history with Torque. Neat. Also not sure with the art, but are those tattoos on Tamika’s arm, or fur? I mean, Gangrel beast marks and all.

Sorry Torque I’m just trying to get the ‘good’ end :(

Mention of the fledgling! Officially ‘disappeared’, that leaves it fairly ambiguous at this point.

Oof. The Circulatory System are... not cool. And yeah Julia’s just been called tf out, I do look forward to this scene in the ‘bad’ end XD;;

COVID strikes back. The Big Beat Burger is closed :( Charlie is sweet, at least! I hope his mom is okay.

Well that rat bit was weird. Hi D’Angelo! Oh my god blood doll rats? Drunk blood doll rats?! Still a damn good detective, though, that’s good shit. On to Kaiser and some answers! ...Yeah, okay, he’s a prime suspect too.

Kaiser, you are a deeply unpleasant person :-\

...good to know pepper spray still works. And, uh, probably satisfying to beat him up XD;; And yeah, there’s the last choice for the ‘good’ ending. Sorry dude.

...huh. Okay, I was at least partially right XD;; Oh Qadir, not you too :-\

Well that’s a bit... weird of Dakota, yes.

lmao oh Benoit you absolute mess. Religion as A E S T H E T I C XD I have a theory he’s from Michael’s line and I also quite sincerely believe that Michael would take one look at him and bitchslap him into the next millennium. He’s a Path follower, isn’t he?

Father Leonard is okay. I wonder who the ‘friend’ is?

This is very Agatha Christie, revealing the killer in the midst, except I have the horrible feeling Qadir’s going to go with ‘it was suicide’ and not ‘it was everyone’.

Denouement! Before it ends, Julia’s traits:

Loyal only to myself

Glass half-empty

A little abuse of power never hurt nobody

You can’t be a writer and not lie

The ends justify the means (duh)

Honestly she may have just blackmailed her way into power, set up Carter to take the fall, and sent poor Dakota to final death, but the drama was impeccable XD Good luck not ending up in the Abyss, Julia!

#ry plays sony #vampire the masquerade #vtm shadows of new york

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splendidlyimperfect · 4 years

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Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Ao no Exorcist | Blue Exorcist Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Relationships: Okumura Rin/Suguro "Bon" Ryuuji, Okumura Rin & Suguro "Bon" Ryuuji Additional Tags: Canon Universe, Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Grief/Mourning, Crying, Hugs, Reluctant Affection, Bon's not great a feelings but Rin needs a hug, Feelings, Parent Death, Past Character Death, Pre-Slash, I just have a lot of feelings okay, Tails, Bon really wants to touch Rin's tail but isn't sure why, it's because he's gay, This is sappy as shit, The Author Regrets Nothing

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“He killed my dad, too.”

Bon freezes with the door to the roof partway open, letting a sliver of light spill out into the night. The voice is Rin’s, and Bon can just see him sitting on the edge of the roof with his knees pulled up to his chest. Bon frowns, shifting to see if Yukio is sitting there, but nobody else is around except Rin’s familiar, Kuro.

Kuro meows at Rin and headbutts him, curling around his back and rubbing his face against Rin’s leg. Rin sniffs, and Bon realizes with a start that he’s crying.

Continue reading on AO3

“I know,” Rin says quietly, reaching down to scratch behind Kuro’s ears. “I just wish I could...” His voice wobbles and he drops his forehead to his knees, shoulders trembling.

Bon’s fingers tighten on the door handle and he hesitates, looking between Rin and the stairs behind him. He’d come up here for quiet – the view of the city at night clears his mind when things are complicated – and Rin is anything but quiet. But he can’t just leave.

Kuro meows again and Rin shakes his head. “They’re still scared of me,” he mumbles into his sweater. “Back at camp, I just wanted to protect them. I didn’t mean to...” He pulls tighter into himself, glancing down at Kurikara, which is sitting on the roof next to him. “They’re right. I am dangerous.” Kuro makes an indignant sound, but Rin ignores him. “Maybe it’d be better if they’d killed me.”

“Don’t talk like that, idiot!” Bon shoves the door open the rest of the way and stalks over to the edge of the roof, hands tightened into fists. Rin flinches, looking up at him with wide eyes. His expression jumps from confusion to fear, taking a quick detour at shame before ending up at anger.

“What do you care?” he snarls, baring sharp teeth while Kuro hisses at Bon. “Or do you just want to do it yourself?” The anger quickly disappears, and Rin just looks exhausted. He nods at the sword. “Go ahead. It doesn’t matter.”

“Don’t be stupid,” Bon insists, but guilt simmers in his chest as his earlier words come back to him. I’ll kill you myself. There’s no bruise on Rin’s cheek from where Bon hit him – Bon supposes that must have something to do with him being a demon. “I didn’t mean it.”

“Yes, you did,” Rin says. He looks back out over the city, resting his chin on his folded arms. Kuro hisses at Bon, then stalks around to Rin’s other side, curling up against him.

Bon sighs, rubbing his face, then sits down on the roof with his feet hanging over the edge. Rin shifts away from him, pulling his legs closer to his chest. His cheeks are still wet, and his eyes are red, and the defeated expression on his face makes Bon feel like shit. Up here in the dark, Rin doesn’t look like a demon. He just looks like a small, scared boy, and Bon knows exactly how that feels.

“I’m sorry,” Bon manages, grinding his teeth. He’s never been good at apologizing. “I’m not gonna kill you. You’re not evil, or whatever.”

Rin doesn’t answer. Something moves in the corner of Bon’s vision and he realizes that it’s Rin’s tail, flicking back and forth in agitation. It’s fascinating, and he almost reaches out to touch it but pulls back before he can embarrass himself. Instead he leans back on both hands and looks up at the stars. It’s hard to see them with all the light pollution, but he can pick out a few familiar constellations.

“What did you mean about him killing your dad?” Bon asks after a few minutes of silence. Rin tips his head again and his brow furrows into a frown. “You were talking to, uh... the cat,” Bon says quickly. His cheeks feel hot and he’s not sure why. “You said ‘he’ killed your dad. Who?”

“Oh.” Rin picks at a loose thread on the cuff of his sweater. “Satan.”

“But isn’t he—”

“He’s not my dad,” Rin growls. There’s another sharp flash of teeth, but it’s accompanied by a waver in Rin’s voice. “You said—all of you, your families were killed by Satan, but so was mine.” He sniffs and wipes his face. “He killed my dad, too. I watched him die and I couldn’t do anything.”

The guilt in Bon’s chest grows heavier as he watches Rin bite his lip to try and hold in the tears. “I didn’t know,” he says. “I’m sorry.”

“I didn’t ask for this,” Rin says, gesturing to the sword beside him. “I wasn’t trying to lie to anyone, or trick any of you. I just...”

“Just?”

“I liked having friends,” Rin says, so quiet that Bon can barely hear him. “I never had friends before.”

“You still have friends,” Bon says.

Rin frowns. “But you said—”

“I know what I said. Listen to what I’m saying now. You saved Konekomaru today. You proved you’re not evil, or gonna hurt any of us.” Rin doesn’t say anything and Bon sighs. “I still think you’re a dumbass,” he grumbles. “But you’re my friend.”

Rin shakes his head and Bon can see tears spilling down his cheeks. “Don’t,” he says quietly. “Please, I just—”

“Come here, you idiot.” Bon’s moving before he can stop himself, shuffling closer to Rin and wrapping an arm around his shoulders. Something in his stomach does a little flip and he pushes it back, ignoring the sensation. Rin stiffens under his touch but doesn’t push Bon away.

“What are you doing?”

“What does it look like?” Bon’s happy it’s dark so that Rin can’t see the red flush that’s creeping up his neck to his cheeks. Being this close to Rin without fighting is strange, and Bon’s surprised to find that he really doesn’t hate it. Rin smells a bit like woodsmoke, and his skin is warm where Bon’s fingers touch his arm.

“I don’t—”

“Just shut up,” Bon grumbles.

There’s a long moment where Rin seems like he might get up and run, and then it’s as if he deflates completely. He slumps against Bon, head coming to rest on his shoulder, and lets out a soft, grief-filled cry that takes Bon back to being small and angry and afraid.

“I miss my dad,” Rin manages between tears. “I’m sorry.”

Bon’s not sure what Rin is apologizing for, but he doesn’t ask. Instead he runs his thumb across Rin’s shoulder and lets him cry. It’s both strange and comforting at the same time – like they’re meant to do this instead of bicker and fight.

Eventually the tears peter out and Rin takes a shaky breath, lifting his head and rubbing his eyes with his sleeves. He doesn’t move away, though, so neither does Bon. The moment feels like spun sugar, a second from dissolving, and Bon’s not sure he wants it to end.

“They’re gonna kill me,” Rin says quietly. “If I don’t pass the exam.”

Bon’s stomach twists uncomfortably at the idea, but he keeps his voice steady when he says, “Then pass it.”

“I’m trying.”

Bon’s about to reply when something brushes his leg and he jumps in surprise.

“Shit, sorry,” Rin says as Bon realizes it’s his tail. He quickly grabs it and tucks it under his leg. “It kinda, um... has a mind of its own sometimes.”

“Oh.” Bon feels the inexplicable urge to touch it again. “It’s okay.” Rin manages to keep the end of the tail trapped for a few seconds before it frees itself and flicks against Bon’s thigh again. “What does it feel like? Having a tail?”

“Weird,” Rin admits. Neither of them mentions the fact that Bon’s arm is still around his shoulder. “It’s uncomfortable to hide it.”

“Can I touch it?” Bon finally asks. The last half hour has been one of the weirdest of his life, and he’s pretty sure Rin’s not going to push him off the roof for asking. Rin nods awkwardly and Bon reaches out, running his fingers across the fur. “It’s soft.”

Rin doesn’t answer, and when Bon’s fingers reach the end of his tail, he makes a small squeaking noise.

“Sorry,” Bon says, quickly withdrawing his hand, but Rin shakes his head.

“No, it’s fine.” He swallows, and Bon’s pretty sure he shuffles a tiny bit closer. “It’s, um... it feels nice.” Bon’s cheeks burn when Rin tips his head back onto his shoulder, then nudges him with his knee. “Can you...”

He brings his hand back to Rin’s tail, combing his fingers through the fur carefully. Rin sighs, then makes a quiet sound that’s almost a purr as he relaxes against Bon again.

A million thoughts drift through Bon’s mind as he keeps stroking Rin’s tail, wondering how in the hell he managed to end up here. It’s not uncomfortable though, and neither of them move to break the silence. Kuro joins them, hopping up on Rin’s lap and stretching out so one paw is touching Bon’s thigh.

“I’ll help you study,” Bon says, breaking the silence between them. “If you want.”

“Really?”

“Only if you take it seriously.”

“I will,” Rin promises, and Bon can hear the sincerity in his usually affable tone. “I have to.”

Bon nods, then slowly, carefully tips his head so it’s leaning on Rin’s. It feels right, and he knows for sure that he doesn’t want to lose this – whatever it is. He has no idea what tomorrow will bring. Maybe they’ll yell at each other, maybe they’ll fight. Maybe things will be a little bit softer.

“You’ll pass,” he says. “We both will. And then we’ll kick Satan’s ass and avenge everyone.”

“Promise?” Rin asks, so quiet that Bon can barely hear him, and Bon nods against his hair.

“Yeah,” he says. “I promise.”

#blue exorcist #ao no exorcist #bonrin #rin okumura #suguro ryuji #blue exorcist fanfic #fanfic #angst #hurt/comfort #just me having feelings as usual #my fic

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