#i just love them gnawing at each other like bitch back the fuck off.

[hannibalismos-jaaneman]

we, as a fandom, don't talk enough about the fact that hannibal is an absolute boss for sitting there prettily and letting the two people he's enthusiastically fucking have a catfight about getting railed by him at dinner in naka-choko. like, you go girl.

#raj shitposting #that entire scene is just- so chaotic #it's so many things at the same time #it's the wife and the ofc-she's-the-mistress having a passive aggressive fight about who serves better cunt. #it's a mother rapid firing questions at her son's boyfriend. #it's friends having a fight over who knows more secrets about the mutual friend at their birthday party. #i just love them gnawing at each other like bitch back the fuck off. #hannibal #hannigram #miss will graham #alana bloom

[rocknrollbabe14]

As You Fly (Eddie x Reader) (Request)

As You Fly (Eddie x Reader)

Request: Could you write about Eddie begin seriously injured from the bat bites but doesn’t end up dying but you think he’s going to die but the reader confesses her love for Eddie and when Eddie is healing at the hospital the reader and Eddie kiss passionately and comfort each other? @thomas-ellis

Warnings: cursing, mentions of death, injuries, grief, sadness, mental health issues. If you have recently experienced loss, I suggest avoiding this for now. 

Author’s Note: I am aware this is not exactly like his death scene or the scene where the demobats attack him, but I tried to make it as close as I could while keeping the plot. I hope you all enjoy. :) This is also based on the song "As You Fly" by Regina Price. Give it a listen. 

You and Eddie were running for your lives. The group was ahead of you all. He held onto your hand, his grip tightening as his feet picked up speed. All of a sudden, he felt your hand tear away from his. He immediately turned to face you and saw you had tripped on the ground, struggling to pick yourself up. He quickly looked up at the sky before looking back at you. The demobats were growing closer, beginning to circle you like vultures circling their prey. 

Eddie had bought Dustin more time to escape. Dustin and Steve were back through the bedsheet path, waiting on you both before they would sever the ties from the Upside Down to Hawkins. The plan was to get you and Dustin back safely, but you wouldn’t leave Eddie. 

“Y/N!”, he screamed, pure desperation in his voice. 

“Eddie, help me!”, you begged.

He ran to you, letting his guard down just for a second. He had to help you. He had to get you back to safety. That’s all that was running through this mind. He grabbed your hand, helping you up quickly. 

“Go to the trailer.”, he instructed.

“But Eddie-”

“Go.”, he said more sternly as he began to fend off the demobats heading right for you. 

It was just a few in the beginning. You began running towards the trailer, glancing over your shoulder every now and then to see if he was trying to follow you to the trailer too so you both could return from the Upside Down. He was but it was much slower than you had hoped for. 

All of a sudden, the demobats began swarming him. They were far more of them than there was of him. 

“Leave her alone and come and get me you sons of bitches!”

“Eddie!”, you screamed.

Eddie’s eyes met yours before he began trying to fend off the demobats. Panic burned in his brown eyes as he quickly realized he had made a dire mistake. You realized right there and then you couldn’t leave him. One attacked him like a chicken pecking at the ground. A few more followed suit, Eddie screaming out in pain as they attacked him, appearing to attack Eddie worse than they had Steve.

You screamed the loudest you ever had, feeling helpless as they bit and gnawed at Eddie. His screams were hellish and laced with agony. At least Eddie knew that if they were attacking him, they were leaving you alone. 

The wind whipped past you, red lightning cracking in the distance. Those little white particles fall like snow in front of you. You could hear the screams of Dustin and Steve telling you to come on, to hurry up. Their screams were loud and desperate, begging, pleading with you to leave Eddie and come on. But you just couldn’t. You couldn’t leave him. They had come back for you, hearing your shrill, blood-curdling scream. They had used the bedsheet path to come back to you.

“Eddie, fuck, please don’t leave me.”

You held your boyfriend in your arms, watching him struggle to breathe. His eyes were glassy, his skin damp. He was in shock. You repositioned yourself, causing him to wince in pain and beg you to stop moving, practically ripping your heart out. You knew this was a bad idea, but Eddie wanted to do this. He wanted to avenge Chrissy’s death. He owed it to her, he said. She had died and for what cause? What did he have to live for other than you? He was facing being brought up on murder charges if he lived. What kind of life was he going to have? 

He would be torn away from you either way. You all had already had the discussion that he couldn’t run forever. Eventually, the jig would be up. But you would rather have him alive and in prison than dead and in the ground. 

“Just pr-promise me some-something, okay?”, he choked on some blood. 

“No, we’re not doing this.”, you shook your head, tears forming in your eyes.

He took what energy he had left to grab your hand. “Babe, please.”

Your heart ached more than it ever had. “No, just talk to me. Please, Eddie, stay with me.”

He could hear the pain and desperation laced in your voice, but he felt like his time was running out. He knew deep down inside his injuries were far more grave than you or Dustin had let on. He could feel himself beginning to succumb to his injuries. He was trying to hold on for you, but he didn’t know if he could. They always said your life flashes before your eyes just before you die and it was happening for him.

He remembered the first Hellfire meeting he ever had, Johnny Collins, the Dungeon Master inviting him, “a lost little sheep” to Hellfire where he fell in love with D&D, the first time he ever laid eyes on you, the first time your eyes met his, the first kiss you all ever had, the first time you all had sex. He never imagined someone could care for him the way you did. He chalked up his love life to be non-existent. He was a freak, after all. But you had come into his life and changed everything. 

“Just pr-promise me you’ll walk that stage and you’ll do-do it for us. You-you’ll go on to college and make some-something of yourself just like I-I know you can.”

You looked away from him, your face beginning to burn as tears began falling out of your eyes. You didn’t want his last few moments to be of you crying for him. But you couldn’t help it. 

“Eddie, we’re supposed to do that together.”, your voice was weak and shaky. 

“I-I know. Just in case, I don’t-don’t make it. I love you, Y/N. I always have and always will.”, he coughed again, blood coming up, staining his teeth and lips crimson. 

You closed your eyes and the tears fell harder, one even hitting him. He blinked slowly in response. 

“Babe, don’t-don’t cry, okay? I can’t le-leave with you crying over me.”

Sobs threatened to rack through your body and it was taking everything you had in you to hold them back. You couldn’t believe this was happening. It felt like a bad dream and you just wanted to wake up. You just wanted to wake up and see Eddie sleeping beside you, before cuddling up to him again and going back to sleep. He would ask you if you had a bad dream. You’d answer yes and he would convince you everything was okay.

“I-I love you too, Eddie. I always have. I’ll never stop loving you, you hear me?”, your voice was weak as tears slipped from your eyes, you took your free hand to wipe them quickly. 

He nodded, closing his eyes. “You and Steve watch over Dustin for me, okay? And all my other little sheep. Even Sinclair’s little sister.”

More tears rolled out of your eyes and the shouts coming from Dustin and Steve were deafening. You leaned down, placing a kiss on Eddie’s crimson-stained lips. His brown eyes were glassy but you saw his lips curve into a small smile. You heard a loud, ringing in your ears, making their words drown out. You felt arms wrap around you and pull you up, throwing you over their shoulder. You don’t remember what they were saying or who it was. 

“Eddie!”, you screamed, finally losing it.

You saw someone grabbing him, throwing him over their shoulder, his eyes glossed over and you felt for sure he was dead. You finally saw how much blood he had on him. He was gone, he had left you in this cruel world all by yourself. You might have been with your friends but you had never felt so alone in your entire life. You blacked out after that. You don’t remember anything else that happened.

____________________________________________

“Y/N?”, you heard a familiar voice. 

Your eyes shot open. The figure was blurry, hardly coming into view. The walls around you were blue tile and everything was clean and white. It looked like the hospital if you had to guess. Where were you? You blinked, attempting to make the figure clearer. Steve Harrington came into view.

“Steve?”, you choked out.

“You gave us a scare back there. How are you feeling?”

You breathed, your head pounding. “Where’s Eddie?”

Steve sighed, coming closer to the bed. His face had cuts and scrapes. He looked like he had been to hell and back. 

“Just get some rest.”, he said quietly. 

Why was he avoiding your question? It made you more scared and you feared Eddie was dead. Your worst fear had come true. You just knew it.

“Steve, is he de-dead?”, you asked, your voice quivering.

Steve looked down at the ground, having a hard time facing you. 

He looked back up to you with tears in his eyes. “Let’s just focus on you right now. Dustin is supposed to be coming with Mike, Nancy, Robin, and Erica.”

You shook your head. “Steve, I need to know.”

Steve sighed. “The doctor doesn’t think we should talk about him right now, Y/N.”

Anger began to fill your chest and your face was growing hot, causing your blood pressure to rise. The machine started going off, causing a nurse to rush in. 

“When did she wake up?”, you heard her ask Steve in a panic.

“Just a few minutes ago.”

“Tell me if he’s okay, Steve. Level with me, dammit!” 

Steve looked taken aback by your anger as the nurse made her way to the head of your bed. You tried to raise up out of the hospital bed and if you could have, you would have swung at Harrington. He was a friend but he needed to be honest with you. Eddie was either alive or dead. There was no in-between. The nurse pulled something up in a vile, instantly feeding it into your IV. You heard the alarm of the monitor fade and you felt your eyes grow heavy quickly, closing. 

__________________________________________

It had to be several hours later when you woke up again. 

“Y/N?”

This time it was an unfamiliar voice. You blinked your eyes open again. Your body had no energy to fight this time. A man in a white coat stood in front of you and a nurse by his side.

“I’m Dr. Daniels. I’ve been taking care of you since you came in. Your friends brought you in. Do you remember anything?”

You shook your head. You had no recollection of even coming to the hospital The last thing you remembered was someone picking you up, throwing you over their shoulder, getting you out of the Upside Down. You very well couldn’t tell the doctor that.

“You came in last night. You were hysterical. We sedated you to make sure you had no injuries. We understand your boyfriend was severely injured.”

“How is he? No one will tell me anything.”, you eyed him.

Dr. Daniels sighed. “He’s critical. He’s in the ICU right now on a ventilator. A ventilator is a machine that’s breathing for him. We intubated him—we stuck a tube down his throat when he got here to clear his airway. He was not breathing on his own when he arrived at the hospital and we had to perform CPR. He suffered substantial injuries. His prognosis is unknown right now but we’re trying everything we can.”

You felt like the wind had been knocked out of your sails. Eddie wasn’t dead but he wasn’t doing well. You understood why Steve didn’t want to be the one to tell you this news. You felt tears well up in your eyes again. Part of you wanted to be hopeful but the other part realized there was a better chance Eddie wouldn’t survive. 

“Does his uncle know?”, was all you could say.

“We notified his next of kin, yes.”

You could imagine how Wayne was feeling. You had met him in the time you and Eddie had been dating. He always seemed to like you, teasing Eddie about how he landed a girl like you. 

“When can I see him?”, your voice cracked, weak and fragile.

You hated crying in front of anyone. 

“Let’s wait until tomorrow. These twenty-four hours are crucial for him. If he makes it through tonight, he stands a better chance but he’s far from out of the woods.”

“But he could die—tonight?”

Dr. Daniels nodded, sharing an empathetic expression. “Yes.”

“Can’t I tell him I love him? I mean it could be the last time I see him.”, tears fell from your eyes.

Dr. Daniels sighed, realizing this was hard for you to take in and accept. “He’s got a lot of tubes and machines hooked up to him right now, keeping him sedated. You’re in a very fragile mental and emotional state. You had a nervous breakdown.”

“Please. I need to see him.”, you cried. 

It would be hard to see Eddie in such a condition, but you’d never forgive yourself if he died and you didn’t see him one last time. He did enough by making it out of the Upside Down, barely hanging on for you. He give everything until he couldn’t give anymore. He was a fighter. You loved that about him. 

Dr. Daniels eyed the nurse. This nurse was different from the one you remembered from hours earlier. She returned his glance. 

“You need to at least take your medications before you go.”, Dr.Daniels finally sighed.

Your heart skipped a beat as he finally agreed. 

“Okay.”

You felt the ping of hope in your chest which your mind desperately tried to dismiss. You wanted to see Eddie, you missed him. You thought he was for sure a goner. But you were trying to mentally prepare yourself to see him in the current condition he was in. The nurse went to pull your medications and came back with them in a white paper cup. She smiled at you sympathetically. She explained each of them to you, a few of them geared to help your mental state. 

She came back in with a wheelchair, explaining she would take you to the ICU to see Eddie. You were sore. So sore. More sore than you had ever been in your entire life. You winced as she helped guide you from the bed to the wheelchair. You could feel your nerves begin to set in as she wheeled you out of your room and into the long, white hallway. You felt like you could still break at any minute. She explained those medications would kick in soon, making small talk with you as she finally wheeled you onto the elevator. 

You watched as the numbers changed, finally arriving at the third floor. It felt like it took so long. The nurse wheeled you down another hallway, before coming to a larger door. The ICU was a separate entity. She buzzed you all in and your heart began beating faster as you all cleared the doorway. Your eyes laid on the patients you passed. All of them were sedated and had that machine breathing for them. 

“Is this Edward Munson’s family?”, another nurse asked.

“His girlfriend.”, your nurse responded. 

Your nurse followed the other nurse into a room. 

“Brace yourself. He’s-he’s going to look different.”, his nurse eyed you.

You nodded numbly, remembering the last glance you had of Eddie. 

His nurse took a deep breath as she opened the door and your nurse eased your wheelchair into his room. You instantly felt your heart break as Eddie came into view. Your eyes could hardly focus on all the cords and tubes connected to him. He had so many IV pumps you couldn’t keep up with them. His black curly hair was soft against the pillow, laying almost perfectly. They had cleaned him up really well. His facial expression was flat, the mask covering the majority of his cheeks. You could tell he was almost biting on the tube in his mouth. His chest rose with each rhythmic pump from the ventilator, allowing you to realize he was not breathing on his own.

“We are keeping him sedated to prevent him from biting the tube and fighting the ventilator. But he can still hear you.”, his nurse said quietly.

You nodded, feeling the tears come back into your eyes. Your nurse assisted you to the chair bedside of the head of his hospital bed. They were going to give you both some privacy. They left the room, shutting the door behind them. He looked so peaceful now in contrast to when you were holding him in your arms, the life draining from him. You took his hand easily, sniffling.

“Eddie, I’m so sorry.”, you breathed.

No answer of course. Just the steady beep of the heart monitor and the sound of the ventilator forcing air into his lungs.

You took your free hand and began wiping tears away. “Graduation is in two weeks. Can you believe it?”

No response. 

You sniffled, nodding your head, running your thumb over his bruised and battered hand.

“I just want you to know I love you. I love you more than anything in this world.”

You watched his face helplessly for any sign that he could hear you, understand you. His expression remained flat, causing your voice to crack. You brushed a free hand through his black curly hair, savoring the way it felt in your hands again. 

“You are so strong, Eds. Don’t leave me, please. Fight for me. Fight for Dustin, for your “sheep”. We need you.”

Eddie just laid there, but you knew he could hear you. 

“Remember the song we used to listen to?”, you asked again, tracing his hand. “The one that always made me cry?”

You continued, beginning to sing it even though your voice was raw and cracked. “The pain subsides, I’m mindful.”

Days go by like grains of sand from our hand.

Your tears increased, falling out of your eyes, your voice becoming increasingly more weak and shaky. You instantly regretted letting Eddie hear the hurt in your voice, but you kept going.

When you rise the sky will meet you and close my eyes, I always see you.

Free as you fly. 

You held me close, lifted me high

Now you can go fast into the good night

You stroked his cheek easily, it felt warm in contrast to when you held him in your arms.

When you rise, the sky will meet you and closes my eyes, I always see you.

Free as you fly.

“Free as you fly.”, you repeated again, brushing his hair out of his face easily. 

That was as far as you could manage to get before breaking down. Part of you felt guilty for begging him to stay. You had always heard if someone was ready to go, they needed to hear it from you before they would pass on but you weren’t ready to let Eddie go. He had so much to live for. Whether he thought so or not. 

You sat there in silence for the longest time, letting your silent tears flow. This was the hardest thing you had ever endured. Looking at him was bringing back all the memories you had shared with him. You just wanted to see him smile again. Hear his laughter. See those beautiful brown eyes look back into yours. 

________________________________________

A few days later you were formally discharged from the hospital, Dr. Daniels continued your psychiatric medications and referred you to a grief counselor. He said the sooner you met with the counselor, the better. He was very concerned about your mental health as were your friends. You had barely spoken to Steve, Dustin, Robin, or Nancy. You had almost shut them out. Not intentionally. You never slept anymore. You were terrified to drift off to sleep. You had nightmares about Eddie almost every time you tried to sleep.

Dustin was worried about you. He knew Vecna was still out there somewhere and his gateway was grief. You were experiencing grief even though Eddie was alive. You had experienced trauma. Severe trauma. You had been to see Eddie every day since your discharge from the hospital. The ICU nurses knew you on a first-name basis and greeted you sympathetically. You had spent every night there, maybe closing your eyes for ten or fifteen minutes at a time before his IV pumps alarmed, letting the nurses know his sedation medications were almost empty. Or his high-pressure vent alarm, meaning his sedation was not at an adequate level to keep him front fighting his tube. 

Eddie had made it through the most critical period, but he was far from being out of the woods yet. The nurses updated you each day, letting you know if anything had changed. Not much had changed. Wayne came during the days before he had to go to work at night. He hated to leave but he knew expenses would be tight if Eddie survived. 

“How many days until graduation?”, his nurse, Beth asked.

“Eight.”, you answered meekly. 

“Are you going to walk across the stage and get your diploma?”, she asked, fiddling with his IV pumps.

“I’m not sure.”, you sighed sadly.

She eyed you before focusing her attention back on his IV pumps. “Didn’t Eddie want you to?”

You nodded. “Yes, but I’m afraid to leave him.”

Beth titrated his drips that were keeping him sedated before performing a quick neurological assessment. 

“Hm pupils reactive. Gag reflex present.”, she hummed as she assessed him. “He will be fine for a few hours. He made you promise him. This is a once-in-a-lifetime achievement. Your friends Nancy and Robin need you there.”

You nervously rubbed your hands. “But it feels so wrong without him.”

While you were in the hospital, the police came to interview you regarding Eddie’s injuries and his criminal status. You thanked God it had been a familiar face, Hopper. Hopper coerced you to tell him exactly what happened because he told you he knew there were sinister things happening here in Hawkins. He knew it got worse when he was held in a prison camp in Russia. No one expected him to be alive. 

Hopper helped you formulate a story for the formal police records, however, he also promised you he would clear Eddie’s name. 

“It will, but this is what Eddie would want. He wouldn’t want you crying over him. We will take good care of him for a couple of hours while you graduate.”, she put her hand on your shoulder. 

You nodded easily. 

You sat in silence with Eddie once more, the machines and ventilator beeping rhythmically. The plan next week was to try and wean Eddie from the ventilator if he would tolerate it. It made you nervous to think about it, but that was one step closer to being able to communicate with him. Wayne had come down several times to see Eddie, between his work schedule. The nurses were nice enough to make sure you got a dinner tray, however, you barely picked at it.

You sat in the chair, holding Eddie’s hand easily when a small knock came on the door, instantly grabbing your attention, and causing you to look up. 

“Knock-knock.”, Dustin smiled hesitantly. 

“Hey Dustin.”, you perked up a little bit.

It was nice to see a familiar face and as bad as it sounded, someone who would talk back to you. You got up from your chair and met him, embracing him in a hug.

“No change?”, Dustin eyed Eddie.

You shook your head. “They’re gonna attempt to start weaning him from his sedation next week and try to take the breathing tube out.”

Dustin nodded easily. He held something in a plastic grocery bag and you eyed him, but he wasn’t quite ready to reveal it yet. He made his way to the head of the bed. You knew it bothered Dustin to see Eddie like this. Dustin looked up to Eddie as a role model. Eddie could come off as being a total jerk and dickhead, but Dustin had seen the softer side of Eddie. The side that wanted to mentor Dustin, preparing him to become the new Dungeon Master. Matter of fact, Eddie had told you Dustin had the most potential of anyone even though he was just a Freshman.

After sitting in silence, just watching Eddie, Dustin finally made his way over to you. 

“This is for you.”, he handed you the grocery bag.

You took it hesitantly from him, giving him a questionable look. You opened it up and it was your graduation gown along with your cap. The girls were wearing gold. You felt the silk fabric in your hand, tears instantly beginning to fall from your eyes. 

“Mrs. O’Donnell asked me to bring these to you.”, he smiled.

You looked behind it and there was a green one behind your gold one. You closed your eyes painfully, realizing this was Eddie’s. 

“Dustin.”, you tried to wipe your tears away. 

He sat down beside you, taking you in a deep embrace. You cried into him, instantly feeling guilty for allowing Dustin to see you this vulnerable when you knew he was processing this in his own way as well. However, Dustin was more worried about you. You and Eddie were like his mom and dad at times, making sure nothing happened to him and keeping him safe, putting him first. There were times , he crashed your all’s dates at the trailer, causing Eddie to want to kill him.

“Just please consider coming to graduation. We need you there.”, Dustin eyed you with those puppy dog eyes.

You sniffled before smiling, turning to Eddie. “Hear your little sheep, Eds?”

“You promised him.”, Dustin argued quickly, causing you to smile. 

“He’s trained you well.”, you eyed Dustin, your statement causing him to laugh.

Dustin went on to tell you that Nancy offered for you to stay over at her house and would help you with your hair and make-up Among your guest list would be Steve, Lucas, Mike, Erica, Dustin, and all the members of Hellfire. You knew showing up for graduation would be controversial for the jocks, but you were going to maintain Eddie’s innocence. You knew deep down inside that if anyone made any remark about Eddie, you’d punch them out.

Dustin stayed for a while longer before the night was close to falling. You urged him to get home before it got much later, totally “being a mom” to him, he was quick to remind you. You watched Dustin exit the door, it closed behind him, realizing you were now alone again. Not truly alone, but you were beginning to feel so alone. 

You grabbed his hand once more, squeezing it before placing a kiss on his cheek.

_________________________________________

Several more days passed and it was the day before graduation. Eddie was being extubated today. He had tolerated the weaning of his sedation. Your plan was to never leave the hospital. Nancy had begged you to stay over at her house to have a break, offering Steve to stay with Eddie for a while. Steve had agreed, reminding you that you needed a break. You had been at the hospital for two weeks straight, not hardly taking a break to eat or sleep. 

You were hesitant at first, but the nurse made you feel more at ease, promising you they would take care of Eddie. His nurse promised you this was a good sign, things were looking up. But you knew in this life, not to get hopeful. You silently prayed for Eddie to be safe while you were gone. It wasn’t long before the nurses came in along with the doctor and the respiratory therapist, ready to extubate Eddie. 

They asked you to wait outside his room and informed you that you would hear a lot of alarms, especially the high-pressure ones. Those always scared you the most. That’s when his nurse would rush in and titrate his drips again, preventing him from fighting the tube. You nodded, feeling nervous and anxious. They had explained the risks to you and Wayne including sudden death but you all had decided the benefits outweighed the risks. 

You stood outside, hearing them talk, the doctor ordering suction and all sorts of other stuff. Stuff you’d never heard of. You heard the suction and it reminded you of the dentist. That was as best as you could describe it. After what felt like an eternity, the doctor stepped outside his room. He introduced himself to you and explained Eddie had tolerated his extubation well. He was breathing on his own, the doctor just keep him slightly sedated just to relax him. Tears of happiness finally appeared in your eyes.

Not long after, Steve arrived and prepared himself to watch over Eddie. 

“You’ll let me know if he wakes up?”

Steve nodded, shaking the walkie-talkie. “Yes, I promise.”

You hugged Steve quickly before he reciprocated the hug. “Thank you, Steve.”

He nodded, smiling sympathetically. You had learned days after being discharged from the hospital, Steve had grabbed Eddie, bringing him out of the Upside Down. Dustin grabbed you (with reinforcement from Robin) carrying you out of the Upside Down. You turned to to take one last look at Eddie before going over and kissing him, telling him you’d be back right after graduation.

Leaving the hospital, you felt extremely guilty and instantly filled with worry. Nancy and Robin were waiting for you in Nancy’s car in front of the hospital. Nancy waved to you, a smile spread across her face. You knew they had missed your company. You gave them a small smile before opening the passenger door and climbing in. The ride to her house was a breath of fresh air. Eddie was still on your mind heavily, but it was nice to be back with your friends.

They were all ears as you recounted everything that had happened since you had been staying with Eddie full-time. They were sympathetic, assuring you that this is what Eddie would want. He wanted you to graduate. But you still couldn’t help but think of how you all were supposed to be doing this together. This was the moment he’d been waiting for, finally able to complete his requirements to be eligible for graduation. 

You got a little more sleep that night than you had in a long time. It felt comforting to be around your friends. You felt safer, not as vulnerable. Eddie hadn’t woken up but he was okay. Steve said the nurse said he was doing great compared to the state he had been in when he first arrived. They had told you they hadn’t expected him to live. To be honest, you worried he wouldn’t come out of this either. But he had surprised you all. 

___________________________________________________

Graduation was finally here. You stood in Nancy’s mirror, admiring yourself. She had her hand on your shoulder, assuring you that you looked beautiful. She helped you with your hair and make-up. You couldn’t help that part of you felt empty. Nancy must have read your mind.

“Eddie would want you to graduate.”, she reassured.

“I know, it just feels wrong to do it without him. He deserved this too.”

Nancy nodded. You hugged her. Her mom was very sympathetic to you and told you she was sorry to hear about Eddie but was glad he was doing better. Before you all knew it, it was time to leave for graduation. It was going to be held outside on the football field. Your stomach turned somersaults the entire time on the way. You hadn’t shown your face at school since Eddie’s accident. You just knew someone would say something about him. Nancy parked in the student parking lot. You all filed out of the vehicle, grabbing your graduation caps. 

Everyone was meeting in the cafeteria and would line up in alphabetical order. Nancy joked she would be at the end while Robin was not so happy to be one of the first. Nancy helped you and Robin with your all’s graduation caps, making sure they were even and not lopsided. You couldn’t help but imagine Eddie in his. You both walked into the cafeteria hand in hand, hearing gasps and whispers from everyone who thought he would never graduate. But ignoring them because your all’s future started now.

“Perfect. Does mine look okay?”, Nancy asked, bringing you out of your trance.

You nodded as did Robin. Mrs. O’Donnell quickly came over to you all, ushering you all to get in place. She also sent her sympathies regarding Eddie, even asking how he was doing. You felt eyes on you, watching you. You tried to ignore them, giving Nancy looks near the end of the line. Coming up the line was none other than Valerie Owens, one of the most popular girls at Hawkins High School and she just so happened to be in your graduating class.

She eyed you up and down, giving you a dirty look as she and her friend passed you, laughing. 

“Eddie the Freak Munson deserves to die.”, she laughed. “Especially after killing Chrissy and Jason.”

You instantly felt your blood boil. Nancy heard them too. She shook her head, attempting to mouth words to calm you down, but it was too late. You stepped out of line, and grabbed her shoulder, pulling her back and causing her to gasp. Her eyes had fear in them as they met yours.

“Shut the fuck up about Eddie. Do you understand?”

Your eyes were filled with rage, all the sadness, and other emotions finally coming to a head. You narrowed your eyes, waiting for a response. He almost died trying to save a town that didn’t give a shit about him. He hadn’t killed Chrissy. You knew he hadn’t. He was in the wrong place and at the wrong time. Jason was a grieving boyfriend and you could almost relate to him a little closer now, you hated to admit it. Grief would make you do crazy things. 

“Have to defend your little satanic boyfriend?”, she shot back, before laughing, the fear fading quickly. 

“You don’t know him like I know him. If he’s such a killer, why didn’t he kill me before now?”

She didn’t immediately answer you. And before she could answer you, you felt Nancy’s hand on your shoulder, telling you she wasn’t worth it. 

“Keep his name out of your mouth.”, you warned her as you let your grasp on her gown go, her quickly scurrying away. 

You felt a little better, being able to deflect your anger onto someone else. That was just one example of someone for who Eddie had almost died that viewed him as a freak and a monster. Someone that didn’t value him as you did. Nancy did her best to calm you back down and keep you from crying as the teachers announced it was now time to walk to the field, reminding your class how to properly file in during “Pomp and Circumstance”. 

The graduating class of 1986 filed out of the cafeteria. Minus a few. Your heart instantly ached as the band geared up, beginning “Pomp and Circumstance”. You felt tears trying to come into your eyes as you kept walking with your classmates. Seeing the boys in green just reminded you that Eddie should be here. It was a slow march to your all’s seats. There were three seats in the entire crowd left empty. Chrissy’s. Her senior picture and flowers sat in hers along with her cheerleading jacket. Jason Carver’s was empty. His senior picture and flowers sat in his along with his football jersey and basketball varsity jacket. Lastly, you spotted Eddie’s was empty. His senior picture was in it along with flowers and looks like someone had snuck a Hellfire shirt on his. 

It made you feel like he was dead, even though he wasn’t. You choked your tears back as they had you all sit down. Principal Higgins began giving his introductory speech and welcoming everyone to the graduation ceremony for the class of 1986. You immediately turned, trying to scan the crowd and find everyone. Dustin saw you and enthusiastically began waving. You saw Steve mention something, causing him to cease his actions, gaining a small laugh out from you. 

You turned your attention back to Principal Higgins, as he introduced the Valedictorian and Salutatorian. They gave their speeches, and you were barely able to pay attention. They sent their condolences to the families of the ones who were missing today, naming Jason Carver, Chrissy Cunningham, and Eddie Munson, stating your class had maneuvered through adversity and hardship, coming out triumphant. You perked up at the mention of his name. They finished their speeches before Principal Higgins began handing out diplomas. 

Several went across the stage before Robin did. You, Nancy, and all of your friends cheered her on, causing a smile to spread across her red lips. When they came to Jason and Chrissy’s, they allowed their families to come and receive their diplomas on their behalf. You felt a sadness come over seeing their families all torn up and distraught while accepting their diplomas. They moved on down the list, arriving at Eddie’s name. Wayne couldn’t bring himself to come. He was really struggling. Mrs.O’Donnell was on the stage and ushered you to come get his diploma. 

You stood up, making your way to the stage, feeling tears rush into your eyes. You went up on the stage, Principal Higgins noting you were accepting the diploma on his behalf and that you were his girlfriend. He also asked for continued prayers for Eddie as he was in the hospital. Dustin, Mike, Steve, Gareth, Lucas, and Erica including Nancy and Robin cheered as you accepted it, also accepting hugs and words of encouragement from the teachers. You wiped tears away as you stepped down the stairs, holding it like it was your prized possession.

You sat back down, holding it in your hands, just brushing your hand over the green leather cover. He had done it. Eddie had finally graduated high school, but he had no clue. It shattered your heart into a million pieces. Now, you just wanted to get back to him. You waited on them to call your name before accepting your own, this is almost just as emotional for you. Your friends cheered you on, making you feel you had made the right decision. 

Nancy was one of the last students to accept her diploma and with that, Principal Higgins gave his closing statements before you all moved your tassels over, signifying you were officially graduates. He finished by offering a final congratulations, causing you all to throw your caps into the fading spring sky. You all found yours before Dustin, Mike, Steve, Gareth, Lucas, and Erica made their way down on the football field, giving hugs and congratulations. 

Dustin bear hugged you, causing you to almost fall backward. He informed you that he snuck the Hellfire shirt in Eddie’s seat, and you instantly thanked him. Steve offered to drive you back to the hospital, knowing you would want to skip the celebrations after graduation. You agreed, giving everyone hugs. Dustin asked if he could come back with you, promising to wait in the waiting room. You agreed. The car ride was silent on the way back to the hospital, your graduation gown still on. You held your cap along with your and Eddie’s diplomas.

You wasted no time in getting out of Steve’s BMW and rushing into the hospital, promising you’d get Dustin if Eddie woke up. You rushed to ICU, his nurses letting you in. They gave you a smile and congratulated you. Beth was on shift again, she was sitting in the room with Eddie, waiting on you.

“Is he okay?”, you asked, sitting your diplomas down, instantly coming over to him.

“He’s been fine. I see you graduated.”

“We graduated.”, you emphasized as you nodded to your all’s diplomas. 

You took Eddie’s hand, apologizing for leaving him before kissing his cheek. His head moved slightly. You eyed his nurse for an answer. 

“He’s becoming a little more responsive. It’s a good sign.”, she reassured you.

She excused herself from the room, reminding you if you all needed anything to come get her. You went over and grabbed Eddie’s diploma. You sat down beside him, instantly taking his hand again, stroking your thumb over it. 

“Hey babe,”, you began sniffling. “Guess what?”

No answer again. You were becoming used to that.

“You graduated. You finally did it, babe.”, you smiled, sniffling, tears beginning to roll down your cheeks. 

You opened it, seeing his name in the middle. 

“This certifies that Edward David Munson has satisfactorily completed all requirements of law and standards for high school graduation as prescribed by the State Board of Education and the District School Board and is hereby awarded this diploma. Given this tenth day of May, Nineteen eighty-six.”, you read to him, giving his hand a squeeze. 

You watched him for a moment, praying this would be the moment he woke up. You waited for a few minutes, quickly feeling defeated. You got up to place his diploma back with yours.

“Baby?”, you heard a choked, hoarse voice, causing you to drop everything in your hand.

You turned around, knowing your face was as white as a sheet. “Eddie?!”

“Baby?.”, he choked again, this time taking a coughing fit. 

You ran over to him, still in your graduation gown, having it unzipped. You sat down beside of him, grabbing his hand. 

“Eddie?”, you repeated. “I’m here.”

He coughed again, before his brown eyes fluttered open, causing your heart to skip a beat and you bit your lip, tears filling back in your eyes. He looked at you, taking you in as if he had forgotten what you looked like.

“Hey, baby.”

“Nurse!”, you yelled.

The door busted open with his nurse, Beth leading the pack. She did a quick neurological assessment. She asked Eddie a few questions to gain his orientation. He knew where he was, knew who he was, knew it was 1986 but was unsure of the exact date. She was satisfied with those answers, giving you all more time to say your hellos. 

He smirked up at you. “I see you kept our promise.”

You eyed your gown. “I did.”

You sniffled. You could also see tears coming into his eyes. 

“So I graduated?”, he finally asked, his eyes wide and full of excitement and surprise. 

You nodded, tears falling from your eyes. “So you heard me?”

“Of course I did baby. I heard everything.”, he smiled up at you, quickly raising his arm up to wipe away your tears.

“I hated leaving you.”, you sighed. “I felt so guilty.”

“You look beautiful, baby. That’s what I wanted you to do. Go walk that stage. And you did. I am so proud of you.”, he squeezed your hand before motioning for you to lean down, you both sharing a small kiss.

You never thought you would be able to kiss Eddie again. This was so emotional for you. You remembered how drained, how grey Eddie looked as you had held him in your arms. He was still pale but filled with so much more life. It was like night and day. 

You smiled, laughing before more tears fell out of your eyes. “I love you, Eddie. I missed you so much.”

He smiled, blinking his tears back. “I love you more, Y/N. I missed you too, baby. So much. Hearing your voice and feeling your presence, that’s why I kept fighting to come back to you. You’re my everything, baby.”

Your heart melted with his words. You had sat down on the edge of the bed. You leaned up to him, your alls lips meeting and sharing a more passionate kiss this time, Eddie caressing your cheek, deepening the kiss. You had almost forgotten how his lips tasted. 

“I don’t want to be without you anymore, Eddie.”, you said, breaking the kiss easily. 

He looked slightly confused. “You’re not gonna be baby.”

You nodded. “I mean like I want to be with you like all the time, as clingy as that sounds.”

“Like live together?”, he finally understood, a smile spread across his face.

You nodded. 

“Okay baby, just let me get better and find a job since I’m finally a high school graduate.”, he bragged in the last sentence. 

You laughed easily before sharing another kiss with him. “No rush, Eds. I just want to start a life with you. This has made me realize some things.”

Eddie nodded. “Me too baby. I mean you stood by my side the entire time. I couldn’t ask for a better girl.”

You blushed at his words easily. Eddie wanted to see his diploma and he looked like a child on Christmas morning when you gave it to him. He was proud of himself and he deserved it. He had worked so hard. You informed him Dustin was waiting in the waiting room and really wanted to see him. Eddie laughed easily, asking you to go get his little sheep. You obliged, Dustin’s eyes wide when you told him Eddie was awake.

Dustin ran back to his room, barely allowing you to catch up with him. He burst through the door, happy to see his Dungeon Master. Dustin instantly began filling him in on everything he had missed. Eddie just listened with wide eyes to Dustin’s ramblings. Truth be told, Eddie had missed it.

“Should I tell him?”, Eddie asked all of a sudden.

“Tell me what?”, Dustin interjected. 

“I think so, Eds.”, you smiled, crossing your arms. 

“Well, Henderson, you’ll be a sophomore this year. You’ve really shown potential. Ever since the day, I found you.”

Dustin looked confused and eyed you, wondering what Eddie was getting at. He just nodded easily in response. 

“Henderson, I’m appointing you to be the new Dungeon Master of Hellfire Club.”, Eddie smirked before kissing your cheek. 

“No way! Really?”, Dustin’s face lit up in excitement.

You and Eddie laughed in response before Eddie nodded. “I’m gonna be busy with other things and responsibilities. You’ll understand when you find that girl, Henderson.”

Eddie gave your hand a squeeze, looking into your eyes. 

“Mike is gonna be so jealous he won’t be able to see straight.”

Dustin puffed his chest out, feeling proud of himself. You and Eddie chuckled. “Don’t get a big head, Henderson.”

You and Eddie shared another kiss as Dustin rattled on about what his plans were for the next campaign, even jabbering about Eddie’s manuals and notebooks. Eddie assured him he would give him all the tools for him to be a successful Dungeon Master, attempting to relax him somewhat. Eddie also reminded him he had big shoes to fill before you rolled your eyes playfully. Eddie shrugged playfully before pulling you in for another kiss, causing Dustin to make a face of slight disgust.

#eddie munson imagine #eddie munson #eddie x reader #eddie stranger things #eddie imagines #Eddie munson #eddie munson hc #stranger things #joseph quinn

[stitchkiss]

can u talk about all of them????? curious 🥹👀

i love you. just wanted to start off on that note.

anyway i decided to only tell you about HALF to keep the suspense going yknow😉 so after doing a coin flip, losing it under a table at my campus cafe, hitting my head on said table when i went to get it, then dropping the coin again, i’ve decided to leave it there and use siri to decide which numbers i’ll tell you about. siri wants me to tell you about all the evens!

2. god i love this one. it was the first thiam idea i came up with. so basically it’s a crack treated seriously in which theo finally kisses liam, but all our sweet lovestruck boy can do is say “kachow” bc he couldn’t find a better word to describe what’s he’s feeling rn. and he gets made fun of so hard for making a cars reference after the love of his life kissed him for the first time. there’s a bunch of other fun things i have that leads up to the kiss too.

4. this idea is also a crack treated seriously bc every single person in this fic is so stupid. so what’s going on is liam enlists mason and corey’s help to ask theo out but they’re all stupid about it bc mason and corey hide in some bushes and whisper advice to liam, but at one point there’s a wasp and mason and corey freak out and one of them says “oh my god! punch that son of a bitch” and liam’s. so unaware of what’s happening so. he ends up punching theo. it ends with theo reminding the three of them that he has supernatural hearing and knew what they were doing akfjjskf

i actually might merge 2 and 4 but we’ll see

6. this is cute idea i had that theo and liam somehow get this bracelet with a heart on it and they end up using it as a way to be honest and vulnerable with each other. so they pass it back and forth when one of them needs to talk about something and the bracelet is a way to help them do that.

8. i also love this one. in this fic liam’s such a fucking dork bc i have this hc that when he gets nervous/anxious he just blurts out history facts. especially when theo’s around (he’s been doing it since he realized he has feelings for theo). so whenever they have intimate/vulnerable moments and liam’s nervous he ruins it by talking about, like, the history of stickers or something. he gets better tho!

10. liam somehow gets possession of theo’s beanie in 6x20 and he keeps it bc it smells like theo. this is all i have so far.

12. the title is kinda self explanatory. liam just gnaws on theo bc he bites to show love. and theo’s like “this may as well happen” i have no other thoughts on this one but i’m getting to it!!

lmk what you think

#thanks for the ask bestie #thiam #asks #stitchkiss

[msmarvelwrites]

Sunday Kinda’ Love

Summary: You weren't sure when it happened, falling in love with Bucky Barnes.

Pairing: Bucky x reader

Warnings: insane amounts of fluff, domestic Bucky, Explicit sexual content, Oral (f receiving), fingering, vaginal penetration, lazy counter-top sex, 18+

Word Count: 1.3K

Authors Note: shoutout to @sweeterthanthis who Puts up with me sending her screenshots of my fics every 10 minutes 😂 love you bitch. Thank you for helping me babe!

all mistakes are my own.

The rain patting on the windowsill pulled you from your hangover induced coma as the smell of coffee wafted into the bedroom. You reached over, running your fingers across the empty bed in hopes to find your soldier, though he seemed to have already made the most of your day off. 

You, on the other hand, were fully content to lay in bed all day and sleep away the reminisce of vodka Carol had challenged you to the night before.

The sound of Bucky humming along to the distant radio brought a small smile to tug at the corners of your lips. The way you knew he was shuffling around the kitchen, trying to keep his hands busy until you woke made you melt.

You weren't sure when it happened. 

The nights seemed to lull into days spent in Bucky’s apartment. Lazing away the afternoons when you both returned home from a mission too sleep deprived to find your way back to your own bed. And you supposed there were worse ways to wake up. 

You struggled, sliding out of the warm covers and onto the chilly hardwood floors. The ground beneath you creaked slightly as you stumbled across the room, grabbing one of Bucky’s old T-shirts and tossing it over your head. 

You patted into the living room, leaning against the kitchen counter until Bucky finally spun around. His super hearing, already picking up on your presence, but the man never seemed to let on he could predict your every move.

Even though you knew he could.

“Mornin’, sunshine.” He hummed, his voice melting over you like a warm bath. 

You smiled, unable to contain the way he made your tummy erupt into a fit of flutters. The pet name always fell from his lips so effortlessly. As if the old Brooklyn charm was always just beneath the surface of that stormy gaze.

“Good morning, Sarge.” You quipped, sneaking past him as he groaned under his breath, neck luling back as he eyed you pouring yourself a cup of coffee. 

“You know, you could get away with murder by calling me that.” He mumbled, caging you against the counter, his hot breath fanning against the shell of your ear. 

“Who told you my master plan?” You chuckled, setting down the mug and leaning into his touch. 

The man was, in every sense of the word, intoxicating. From the way he called your name to the feather like touches that sent electric shivers to explode through your body each and every time he held you. It was unnerving how easily you gave yourself to him. And completely out of character for you…

That was, of course, until you met Bucky Barnes. 

Bucky hummed, a careless laugh rumbling against your skin as he spun you around, his lips instantly melting with yours. 

You laced your arms around his neck, breathing him in - the faint taste of his mouthwash tingling against your tongue, rendering you weak. 

His vibranium arm whirled, clutching you by your waist and lifting you effortlessly onto the counter as he stepped between your legs. His hands lazily rubbing your thighs, lips dancing across the sensitive skin on your throat. 

“Bucky,” You managed to breathe out, head lulling back against the cupboards as he began tugging at your panties. “What about breakfast?” 

Bucky chuckled, stilling in his movements as you met his gaze. His eyes, crinkled at the corners as he grinned down at you with a softness you couldn't quite put your finger on. With a soft kiss on the nose, he rested his forehead against yours, warm minty breath fanning against your lips.  

“Sunshine, you're all I want.” 

You smirked, miring his lopsided smile as you lifted yourself off the counter. In one skilful movement, Bucky had your panties sliding down your leg, hanging around your ankle as he pressed his erection against your dampness. 

Your eyes rolled back in your head, blissed out as he dropped to his knees, hands on either side of your knees as he licked a long, hot strip up your thigh. His fingers, easing into your slick folds, opening you up as his tongue lapped against your dripping hole. 

“Tease.” You accused, hands tangled in his cropped hair as he slipped his index finger deep inside, curling it against your fluttering walls. 

“Is that so?” He mumbled, and though you couldn't see his lips, you knew the exact smirk playing on them. 

You head snapped back, crashing against the wooden cupboard as his tongue found your clit, swirling around the aching bud as he drank you in. Your whole body was lit aflame - legs lazily wrapped around his broad shoulders while he made quick work of your impending orgasm. 

You couldn't help it, the man knew every weak spot you had. The way he memorized every way to pull you apart in his hands had you trembling, begging to shatter. 

“Oh god - fuck, Bucky. I’m-”

He hummed, and with the flick of his tongue, you were falling off the edge. Figuratively and literally and he held you up, your orgasm crashing over you like a title-wave as you drowned in it’s ecstasy. 

“Fuck-” Bucky gasped, your slick coating his stubble as he licked his lips clean, the action causing you to shudder. “You taste so sweet. Gotta’ have you.”

Before you could answer, Bucky had you wrapped around his waist, spinning you carefully as you tumbled against the kitchen island, body still quivering. You watched from hooded eyes as he freed himself from his boxers, stroking his cock and lining himself up with your dripping cunt. 

He sank into you, slowly at first, hooking his cold fingers under your knee and wrapping your leg around him. You could only arch your back, body aching and used as he carefully rocked his hips into you. You bit back a moan, watching Bucky toss his head back, eyes snapping shut while he slowed his pace. 

You knew he was holding back, you had seen him come undone before. And yet, something about the way your bodies tangled together felt different. His actions- more deliberate and calculated. His body conveying something words never stood a fighting chance to. 

He kept his agonizing pace, his length dragging against your walls, pulling him deeper into you until he had your eyes rolling back in your head. You begged for more, body vibrating as he pulled you against him. His lips, searing as they found yours, carelessly running down your throat and sucking on that sweet spot that had you moaning his name like a prayer. 

“That’s it sunshine. Fuck, just like tha-” 

Bucky’s fist crashed down beside you, his hips snapping to meet yours as he chased his high. You could feel the familiar coil building in your belly, his cock pulling you closer and closer to the very edge until he let out a gasp, hands finding your waist as he held you still. Spurts of his hot spend coated your walls, never easing up on his thrusts until he had you screaming his name. 

You stayed like that, your head resting in the crook of his neck as you both tried to steady your breathing. Your heart felt like it might explode out of your chest as his hands ran circles across your back, grounding you and bringing you back to him. 

“I’m falling in love with you, Buck.” 

You didn't even know the words had left your lips as Bucky slipped himself out, eyes trained on yours. The silence before he spoke eating away at you until the gnawing almost became too much. Maybe he wasn't ready for that? Had you spoken too soon? Had you read the room-

“I can't believe you beat me to it.” Bucky chuckled, his lips instantly finding yours as he smiled into the kiss. “You’re full of surprises, aren't you, sunshine?”

“I’m full of something, Sarge.” 

#bucky x reader #bucky barnes #bucky barnes smut #bucky barnes x reader #bucky x y/n #bucky barnes x reader smut #msmarvelwrites #bucky barns x reader

[y0itsbri]

shameless summer series (s2 era) - based on this prompt posted by @ianandmickeygallavich & @shameless-notashamed ☀️📽️🍿

Mandy doesn’t know why the fuck Mickey is tagging along to her movie date with Ian. He says it’s because the cinema is air-conditioned. She doesn’t believe him, why would he sit through a romantic comedy just to keep cool? And she also doesn’t get why Ian sits in the middle of them.

words: 1.2k

"Ian, come on we're gonna be late!" Mandy yelled from the bottom of the steps outside the Gallagher's house.

"Jesus Christ, Mands, did you want the fuckin' Twizzlers or not?" Ian passed the threshold to the outside and smacked her shoulder with the candy before she smuggled them out of his grip.

"Thank you, boyfriend," she kissed his cheek as he scrunched up his nose at the affection -- especially in front of her brother, who looked onto their loving display amused before returning his gaze back down at the ground.

Mandy kicked Mickey in the shin.

"Ow- fuck! What?!"

"Be fuckin' nice, dickwad," she threateningly whispered.

If Ian was looking closely, he might have seen the tips of Mickey's ears blush red as he muttered a "'sup, Gallagher."

"Hey Mick," Ian smiled at him, unable to help himself.

"'m sorry my idiot brother decided to crash our date." Mandy apologized, emphasizing the last word and glaring at an unbothered Mickey. She led her boys down the side walk en route to the movie theater for the two o'clock showing they had been planning to see.

"Oh, did he now?" Ian teased, threatening to cross into Mickey's part of the sidewalk, but Mickey held his ground and dodged Ian's attempts to bump into him.

"It's hot as balls out and you know damn well Dad hasn't paid the AC in ages." Mickey pulled a piece of Mandy's hair from behind her.

"Bitch! Coulda went to wherever the fuck it is you normally terrorize," she swooped her hair to the front of her shoulders, out of Mickey-the-menace's reach.

"No AC."

"Whatever."

-

Ian caught the side door to the theater as a group of kids were exiting a movie. The three teenagers snuck in successfully.

"'ey Ian, ya want some popcorn? I was gonna get some."

"Uh, yeah, sure -- thanks Mickey," Ian grinned as Mickey turned away without another word.

"Shit! We're gonna miss the previews -- let's go!"

"What about Mickey?" Ian wondered.

"Uh, we'll save a seat? Duh? Do you have worm for brains?"

"Shut up," Ian shoved her and she giggled.

-

Mandy cuddled into Ian's side as they took some empty seats in the back of the theater. She loved spending time with her best friend, but why did her brother always have to cock block? Okay -- not that she was gonna get some, anyways, because Ian's fucking gay or whatever, but it's still the sentiment!

As the final previews ended, Mandy believed that Mickey would truly be a no show. She had no idea why he tagged along to see Perks of Being a Wallflower with them in the first place when she was pretty sure some movies with like fucking superheroes or battleships or some shit were on next door. He hasn't been soft enough to watch a romance movie in years -- especially in front of another guy. It just didn't add up.

She sighed as Mickey finally waltzed into the theater, two bags of popcorn in hand. Mandy picked up her purse from the seat next to her for Mickey to sit down, but he kept walking and plopped down on the other side of Ian. The fuck?

"Mick, I saved you a seat here," she whispered.

Mickey shook the bags of buttery puffs between himself and Ian, "Popcorn." He turned back towards the screen as if that justified everything. Whatever. Ian was still hers at least.

Ian moved his hand from Mandy's arm so he could eat his popcorn.

Motherfucker.

She gnawed on her Twizzlers.

-

Ian had a hard time focusing on the movie at first. Mickey was manspreading and his left thigh was pushing into Ian's -- hand-me-down athletic shorts touching worn denim.

Ian glanced over at Mickey just in time to see him tilt his head back, exposing his throat, and dump the contents of the popcorn bag into his mouth, spilling a few pieces.

Mickey gave him a side eye and cocked an eyebrow up, "See something ya like?"

"You're a messy eater."

"Says the guy with half his food on his chest." Ian looked down. Oh.

Before he could bring his hand up to brush it off, Mickey plucked off a piece of popcorn and popped it into his mouth, chewing slowly while keeping eye contact with Ian. Motherfucker.

Ian was not about to be sporting a semi with fucking Emma Watson on screen and Mandy two inches to his left. He wasn't.

Mickey grinned and turned his focus back on the movie again.

-

Of course this movie would have a queer character that Mickey was both repulsed and drawn towards. Some things hit a little too close to home for comfort, okay?

Fuck.

He knew he was frozen and tense. He didn't expect anyone else to notice, but of course, fucking Ian was like an alien motherfucker always tuned into his frequency. He always knew.

Without looking at him, Ian cautiously placed his hand over Mickey's thigh. When Mickey didn't push away - in fact, he leaned into it, - Ian gently stroked his leg with his thumb in what he thought was a loving gesture. An I see you gesture. An it's okay gesture.

Maybe it would be okay.

-

Mandy started tearing up near the end of the movie, so Ian, in his perfect boyfriend role, wrapped his arm around her shoulders -- her face tucked into his chest. Her eyes were glued to the screen, so she didn't even notice that one of Ian's hands was dropped to the side of the seat and inched so close towards the edge, towards Mickey's seat -- so close, in fact, that the boys had been linking pinky fingers for the better part of the movie. Hidden in the dark of the theater. Their fingers had started sweating like half an hour ago, but neither of them could bring themselves to pull away just yet, savoring their little piece of forever in the grimy cinema. Some shit about we accept the love we think we deserve.

-

"I'm gonna go to the bathroom before we go, you guys gonna be fine by yourselves for a minute?"

"We'll see," Mickey muttered. Mandy frowned.

Ian clasped his hand over Mickey's shoulder, "He means we'll be fine."

Mickey flipped him off until Mandy was out of view and then dipped his head towards one of the theater doors, motioning for Ian to follow. The door didn't lead to another theater, but to a storage closet.

Before the door was even able to close all the way, Mickey frantically reached to pull down Ian's pants. Ian's brain worked slower than his dick as he managed to comprehend their current situation.

"Mick, we have like no time," Ian groaned into it, his feeble attempt to not get so turned on quickly failing.

"Imma make it quick, new personal best."

Ian's chuckle turned into a gasp. Okay, damn, maybe so.

Mickey's head rested on Ian's chest and Ian's head fell atop Mickey's, the scent of his hair gel mixed with him intoxicating his senses.

Motherfucker.

-

Mandy exited the bathroom, her company no where to be seen. She leaned against the pole, debating calling Ian or waiting another couple minutes. Sure enough, the boys came wandering over a few minutes later.

"Took ya long enough, where'd you run off to?"

"Uh, Ian wanted to look at the movie poster for, uh-"

"Battleship."

"Yeah, Battleship."

"Nerds," Mandy called, walking towards the exit. They were terrible liars. They all knew it. Whatever, they hadn't killed each other, that's all she cared about. She turned around to face the semi-stunned boys, "Coming?"

They headed back home in the sweltering sun, Mandy leading the group as always.

And if the two boys walked a little closer than before as Mandy turned a blind eye, that was nobody's business but theirs.

#shameless #mandy milkovich #ian gallagher #mickey milkovich #ian x mickey #ian x mandy #mickey x mandy #my posts #shameless s2 #gallavich #shameless fanfiction #shameless fanfic #gallavich fanfic #gallavich fanfiction #shameless summer

[soulwillower]

tozier (vii)

(tozier!reader smut)

requested: okay so once regular requests open, here’s my idea. so the reader and richie are siblings and they absolutely hate each other and to get under his sisters skin, he fucks her best friend. so in sheer anger she decides to fuck all of his

warnings: smut, unprotected sex, dirty talk, also minor violence, bit of blood, sub reader AND dom reader, BOTH baby, light choking, mild mild cumplay, oral (fem recieving) 

part 7 of the tozier series [  i  ii iii  iv v vi ]

guys!! finally the last part, thanks for all the love on this series :) this was rly so so much fun to write for yall, pls let me know how u feel about this/the series in general

(losers and reader are 20+ and in college in this)

4.5k words

♡

"i fucked your friends, anyways." you say with a grin. 

"funny, y/n. as if any of them would settle for you." richie snarls, smirking as if he's proud of what he'd said. it makes you smirk, shaking your head. if only he knew. 

"richie, i don't think she's joking." ben speaks up. everyone's eyes turn to ben, and your heart pounds as you bite your lip. you look at each of the others quickly - ben's gnawing on his lip and looking at richie uncertainly, mike is staring at the ground in thought, eddie's staring at his lap with an amused grin, bev is smirking between the two boys with her eyebrows raised, and bill is looking at ben with a small look of realization.

your eyes land on stan, who's staring back at you intently, a suggestive look on his face as he tugs a small part of your underwear from his front pocket as he thumbs it with his finger. you send him an intent look back, trying to beg him not to do it. 

when you look at richie, he's shocked, mouth agape. "what?" richie says quietly. "you fucked my best friend. it was only fair." you say with a shrug, smiling at him. he looks like he might punch you. 

you stifle a laugh, trying to keep a straight face but failing. richie looks furious as he walks up to you, the two of you standing in the middle of the make-shift circle the losers formed in the living room. 

"which one?" he says through a clenched jaw. 

"all of them."

the room is silent as everyone's jaws drop except yours, bev's, and surprisingly stan's - the latter of whom are smirking. richie looks like he's in utter disbelief. it's silent for a few moments, until someone breaks the quiet. 

"who was the best?" 

you turn bright red at that. 

"shut the fuck up, eddie!" richie yells, no sign of joking on his face; he's red as he stares you down. you don't cower at all in front of him - in fact, you're definitely the one with the most power in this situation, and you smirk. 

"so... a-all of us slept with y/n?" bill says in shock. everyone looks around and you're just smirking, your brother furious. "i can't fucking believe you. this isn't funny at all." richie snips. 

"this isn't any different from what you did, richie. c'mon, it was just some fun. it's not like it meant anything more to any of us." mike says. you're shocked that they're all taking it so well.. you never expected them to find out, but they seem to be on your side. thank god. 

your eyes dart to stan, who's still sat on the couch. he meets your eyes and doesn't back down, his gaze piercing and intense. his eyes course over your figure and you feel a twinge of emotion as you remember his hands on your skin, his lips.... you clear your throat as you look away, hoping to god nobody will notice your lace undies sticking slightly out of stan's pocket. 

"-why are you taking her side?" richie hisses, shoving everyone away. his eyes barely leave yours, his fists clenching down by his sides. 

"because you are in the wrong, richie. you cannot possibly be mad at me for this." you say with a grin. "sorry, you're just overreacting. plus you're not just fucking cecily, now you're actually dating her. which is way more shitty. and clearly they all wanted me, richie. i'm an angel."

bill snorts from where he's standing, "yeah r-rich, you're the one who always says that girls who suck fingers without being told to go to h-heav-"   

richie throws his empty cup towards bill, missing by only an inch as he yells, "can it, denbrough! shut the fuck up!" 

you're bright red from bill's words, looking from him, to richie, and then catching stan's eyes again. you swallow, throat dry. 

"-wait, who was the best?" comes from bev this time. you bite your lip, watching as richie shoves her lightly. you grin, "well, ben was the sweetest, but mike was the most surprising-"  "you better shut the fuck up right now y/n." richie mutters. you shrug, "you talk about cecily all the time to me!" you yell. "plus, i'm not finished. eddie... well, that was the dirtiest." you smirk at him and he grins at the ground, richie moving towards you. you back up swiftly, still talking. "-eddie fucked me in your bed, you know." 

richie shoves you hard, looking the angriest you ever have seen him. everyone else gasps or rushes towards the two of you, but as your back hits the wall near the fireplace you barely wince, laughing. "then there was bev... that was the hottest. you were in the other room." you wink.

bev gives mike knuckles out of the corner of your eye and you almost laugh, watching richie as the others tug him back from you. "y-y/n, stop. we get it, r-richie's gotta calm down." bill says as he holds back richie's seething form. 

you tilt your head, grinning at bill. "what, you don't want richie to know that you have the best dick game?" 

everyone stops, and richie freezes in bills arms. "wh-" bill starts with a cocky smirk, but then richie's wrestling bill to the ground, and your eyes are widening. "richie, knock it off!" bev yells, laughing as richie shoves bill's head and bill just laughs on the ground. 

mike and ben get him off of bill, who's sitting up with a disheveled shirt and smirking. "jesus, richie." stan mutters, still on the couch seemingly unbothered.  

you feel the need to make it worse, just to rub it in. "richie, it's okay. he felt bad at first, fucking me in my bedroom while you were asleep next door-"

"shut up y/n!" richie yells, loud enough that you think the neighbors could have heard. stan laughs from the couch, and richie turns to stare at stan, who's lounging as if nothing's happening, looking entirely amused and unbothered. it’s hot. 

it's quiet for a moment, and it seems like everyone thinks you're done. you mutter, "but stan was the most recent, like ten minutes ago, actually." stan doesn't even really react to your words, he just grins devilishly at richie, dimple popping in his cheek. 

you clench your thighs. 

richie turns to you again. "you're a fucking bitch. you’re so disgusting, it's no wonder you couldn't get any of my friends to want to date you. so you just tried to fuck them all instead. you're embarrassing." richie spits. your eyebrows draw together and you almost quip back but a movement makes you look to your left. stan rises as he states, "richie. shut up." you and richie both look to stan, as do the others. 

"i don't want to hear shit from you, uris. fuck you, i've told you for years to keep your paws off my sister." he spits, and stan tilts his head. 

"she's a grown up, richie. she's not just your sister. if she wants me to go down on her in the backseat of your car, why the hell would i say no?" 

and then richie's swinging at stan, punching him hard in the face.

"richie!"the others call, bill and mike pulling him away and holding him firmly this time, shocked that he really did it. "stan?" you call, moving toward him as he flexes his jaw and holds the side of his face. he stands all the way up and licks his lip, a smear of blood leaking from the fresh split on his lip. richie's shaking his hand, face bright red under his glasses. 

"fuck all of you." richie hisses, turning and shoving eddie and ben out of the way as he grabs his car keys and storms out the front door. 

it's quiet after richie leaves, and everyone decides that he needs cool off time before he comes back or before anyone tries to talk to him. so they then get the message to trail out and head to the basement in groups of two or three until just stan remains. "stan, i'm sorry." you say weakly, offering a hand. he lets you lead him to your bedroom upstairs, silently looking at the ceiling as you re-enter the room with a shitty first aid kit. 

stan is impossible to read as you tear open a wipe to clean around the cut. your hands shake as they rise to his face. "i'm sorry." you whisper, the guilt getting to you.

 you jump a bit as one of his hands lands on the bare skin of the back of your thigh. you meet eyes and stan stares directly at you, "i'd do it again."

you smile shyly, looking down and swiping across his bottom lip to collect the blood. "i never meant for this to happen, i guess. i was just so angry, and i- yeah."

it’s quiet again. 

"when did you and bill fuck?" is all he asks after the silence. you blink at him, thinking. "um... a few weeks ago? when we went to kiera gross's party." 

he hums, his hand still rubbing your bare leg and making you feel weak. his fingertips graze the skin of your ass before moving back down, making you exhale shakily. you feel like you want stan to know that you don't have anything going on with bill - but you're nervous. "i promise, i- god, would you stop fidgeting?" 

your hand grabs his jaw, but he jerks his head away and he tosses you a glare. "i'm fine." he mutters. 

"i don't have to be doing this, i can just go back downstairs." you snap, crossing your arms. 

"yeah, perfect, why don't you go let bill fuck you again?" stan quips. "he was the best, right?" you roll your eyes, shaking your head as you look at his pouty lips. "stan, come on. and tilt your head up." 

it's silent again and stan's staring up above you, avoiding your eyes as you wipe a bit of alcohol over his busted lip. "y'know, i hate to say it, but this is kind of hot." you whisper. 

he stares at you dryly. "you think your brother socking me in the face is hot?" 

you laugh, "no, i think me telling you what to do is. you take directions well." his face blooms light pink at your words and you feel proud. he’s watching you carefully, "really? that's cute coming from you. i seem to remember you begging for me to tell you what to do not even an hour ago." 

you swallow, cheeks going red, but you notice his are too. "maybe you just need to be put in your place, stan." you whisper, leaning forward to capture your lips together. he winces slightly, his busted lip tender against yours, but his hand grips your ass immediately, tugging you towards him. 

you slide onto his lap, straddling him easily. the kiss starts slowly, but quickly heats up when he pulls you down to grind on him, causing you both to let out shaky moans of pleasure. then you gently push his shoulders back, “wanna feel you inside me.” you whisper, noticing his knowing smirk as he lays back, propping himself up on his elbows to watch you. 

you slide back on his lap, undoing his pants and sliding them down his legs. his cock springs up and you bite your lip, hand wrapping around his base. you pump slowly, watching as he bites him lip and tilts his head back. you're filled with desire as you take in his size, desperate to feel him. then you're pressing a kiss to his lips, balancing up on your knees and teasing him against your slit, spreading your wetness. he groans, bucking his hips up but you shush him, kissing him again.

he pulls off your shirt, and you quickly do the same to him, taking in his toned torso. you silently thank whoever made stan so goddamn good at baseball. he groans as you place his hands down and off your body, gently sinking down onto him.

you both let out loud groans, relishing in the feeling of him stretching you out perfectly. his head falls onto the wall behind him as you start to move on top of him, stabling yourself on his chest. “fuck, y/n.” he groans lowly, eyes shut in pleasure. 

he looks so perfect under you and you move yourself quicker, loving how he fills you. one of your hands slips into his hair, pulling and making him groan, his hips stuttering. “stan…” you moan as he places kisses on your neck and chest, moving your hips as you bounce. his teeth nip at your skin, his hands rising to grip your ass, hiking up your skirt. 

leaning forward, you find a new angle and bite your lip to keep from screaming at the feeling. stan's biting his own bruised and split lip, his face flushed and chest heaving. he’s hitting deep inside you and you feel full, moaning as you bounce up and down. you moan into his skin, sucking dark marks up and down to column of his throat, 

you lean to press your hands against his chest, changing the angle again. “fuck.” he mutters and you moan, your legs burning but the pleasure flowing through your body. he all but growls, his head falls against the wall again with a groan of pleasure, his hands raising to your hips and fucking up into you, eyes scrunched. his hips are stuttering and he’s flushed, looking like heaven under you.  "stan," you moan, "you feel so good, fill me up s'good." you whisper, unable to stop yourself as you moan. 

through breaths, he's whispering into your ear. "sorry, who did you say fucked you the best?" he asks as you clench around him. 

"shut up." you whisper into his ear as you bounce on him, your hand rising to his throat.

 his eyes lace shut, screwing with lust as he moans, hands hard on your hips as he fucks you down onto him. you squeeze his throat lightly, feeling him swallow under your palm. your lips meet and he bites down on your lip hard, moaning at the feeling of your hand on his neck. 

"who fucks you this good?" he says, and you can feel his voice vibrate under your palm, his lips in a sexy grin as his eyes flutter shut. "shut up, stan." you say again, "don't make me leave and let you finish yourself off." you whisper in his ear. 

he moans at that as you move your hips, your hand still around his throat. 

his hand rises up your back, palm sliding over your bare skin and then gripping your breasts, starting to thrust up. you moan loudly, forehead falling to his shoulder at the new angle as stan stretches you and hits perfectly deep inside you. your hands fall to his chest, clenching around him as you whimper. 

your legs burn and it's almost like stan can tell, because he's lifting you off him and then swiveling you so that your back falls onto the mattress. he hums, "no, you won't leave." 

you raise your brows as he grabs your legs, pulling you down towards him on the bed. "what makes you think i won’t just get up right now?" you ask. 

but then he's sliding into you, one leg held by his hand and the other behind him. he fills you up and makes your toes curl and your vision cloud in pleasure with one stroke. and then he's thrusting, your whole body bouncing as he pounds into you, hitting your g spot perfectly and making you gasp sharply in pleasure. 

"because," he whispers into the shell of your ear, "nobody can make you cum like i can." 

you let out a shaky breath, the last ounce of dominance gone from your body as he fucks you into the mattress. he slips his thumb into your mouth and you wrap one hand around his forearm, sucking on his thumb and swirling your tongue over the tip of the finger as he stares into your eyes. 

he bites his lip, grinning. "what was it bill said? that girls who suck fingers without having to be told go to heaven?" 

you blush at that as he thrusts into you, and he coos as he slips the finger out of your mouth with a light pop. "yeah, guess he's right. you are my good girl."

and then he's rubbing your clit gently with that thumb, his hips rocking into yours and making your legs shake. you moan loudly, the pleasure making you squeeze your eyes shut. 

he hums, "you'd better be quiet or everyone's going to know who's really your favorite." he whispers cockily against your lips, and your eyes roll back as you moan quietly. 

he smiles at you, other hand smoothing your hair. your eyes fall to the marks from your fingers around his neck, and you get shiver of pleasure knowing the effect you have on him.  "you need me. say it." he whispers against the skin of your chest. 

you let out a strangled, "n-need you, stan... i n-need you." you rush out, feeling dangerously close to your second high of the day. he smiles, kissing you sweetly as he thrusts deeper than before, making you moan into his mouth a low whimper. the aching need is becoming almost unbearable, and you pull him closer to you, clenching around him as you near your high. 

"it’s okay, i need you too, babylove." he whispers into your ear, kissing your hairline as he tugs your leg up more, hitting a different angle. the new sensation pushes you over the edge and you're moaning his name in ecstasy, eyes screwed shut as you pulse around him. you feel euphoric as he rocks you through your orgasm, kissing you softly. 

his name falls from your lips as you hold him tight, your nails leaving small half-moons in his skin. you come down from your high and stan's right behind you, only a few more thrusts until he stills slightly, his breath shake as he props himself above you.

 he pulls out and pumps himself, biting his lip as a bit of blood lingers from the split. you're breathless as he cums in spurts on your stomach, enthralled by the sight of his beauty. "god, y/n." he whispers, the david star charm on his necklace glinting in the light against his bare chest. 

"didn't want to cum inside you." he whispers against your lips, but you pull him closer, "it's okay, i'm on the pill anyways." you whisper. he swallows, sighing in relief as he collapses next to you. "good girl." he whipers breathlessly. you smile into his neck as he pulls you closer to him, your naked limbs warm against each other's bodies. you lay there for a few moments, listening to his rapid heartbeat calm down as he plays with strands of your hair. 

he gets up suddenly, though, and pulls on his own underwear and then pulls your own from his pocket of the pants on the floor. you swallow, watching him as he slowly slides your underwear up your legs slowly. he watches you, too - "did you fake it?" he asks. 

you blink at him. "no, actually." you admit, face red. "never with you." 

he smirks, kissing your bare legs as he makes his way up your thighs. you swallow, heart beating quick. "wh-what are you doing?" you ask. he shrugs, "you look so beautiful when you cum. i want to see it again." 

your throat dries up as you try to swallow to avoid choking at his words, shock coursing through you along with desire. holy fuck. "but your lip-" but he shakes his head, "-don't care." he says, eyes already focusing on your heat. 

"o-okay." you say shakily, "god, please," you add, looking at him as his breath hits you. he watches you as his tongue sticks out, licking a stripe up your pussy before swirling on your stimulated clit, making you gasp in pleasure.

the feeling is sharp and pleasant as he wraps his lips around your clit and sucks lightly, tongue running over your folds. his hands move to hold your thighs as he delves in, your moans quieting as the pleasure increases after already being so overstimulated. 

you're already shaking. his mouth moves on you expertly, his tongue sliding to fuck up into you and making your hips buck, his nose brushing against your clit. you tug on his hair and he groans, sending vibrations through your body that make your toes curl. "stan, f-fuck," you say quietly, whimpering. 

its soft as he looks up at you, his tongue working you so well that within a few minutes, you know you’re already about to cum. your fingers tug his hair hard and then he's reaching to cup your face.

 his thumb presses against your lips and you kiss it softly, making smirk in between your thighs as he kitten licks your clit and draws a gasp from your lips. “stan, oh my god, i’m so close.” you sigh out, overwhelmed by how good you feel, by the pleasure coursing through you and the affection for the boy you’re with.

he just holds you tighter to his face, lapping your juices up and flicking against your clit before sucking, your thighs tightening. “stan, please, i’m gonna-” and but yourself off with a high moan, hand covering your mouth as you hit your high. you cum for the third time on his tongue, your legs shaking as you ride it out, your fingers combing through his curls. you sigh in bliss as you come down from your high, full of affection and need. 

stan rises from between your thighs, pressing a kiss to each before pulling up your lacy underwear and kissing your lips. 

he's wordless as he leaves the room, coming back moments later with a warm washcloth to clean himself off your stomach. you watch him the whole time as he smiles, your handprint fading from his neck. your stomach flutters as you pull on a sweatshirt and press a kiss to his nose. 

but the door opens and shuts from downstairs and you both share a look: now is not the time to test richie. 

stan looks to your window, then back to you, "i'm going to go. it's probably best." 

you pretend not to be disappointed. "y-yeah. makes sense." stan stares at you for a second with a gentle smile before standing and quickly getting dressed the rest of the way. 

you watch silently with an aching heart as he pulls his shirt on, grabbing his shoes and then leaning to kiss you quickly. "hey." he says softly, and you meet his eyes. "i'll... see you soon." 

"okay." you whisper as he slips out your window and down to your roof. 

you don't see stan for almost eight days after that. he doesn't phone the house, the losers don't come by much, stan not at all. richie doesn't speak to you, only in passing and only micro aggressions. it's lonely.

it's almost sunset when the door knocks, and you take your time walking to open it. 

you swing the door open and do a double take as you see the boy standing on your doorstep, hands in his pockets. he looks nervous, but when his eyes catch your figure, his face turns red. 

stanley uris looks devastatingly gorgeous in the dying light of the afternoon. 

"-oh, i thought..." he clears his throat. "i thought richie'd be here." he says, swallowing. you raise your brows, "he's at work right now, actually." you respond, toe drawing circles in the ground. "why did you even try to come and talk to him? he's a nightmare right now, he'd definitely try to beat you up again." you say softly. he chuckles a bit and your heart keels over and surrenders to him. 

stan shrugs, "he's been my best friend since we can remember. it's not as bad as he seems to think, i know we can get through this." 

you nod, heart then deflating as you realize that stan's intending to apologize to richie and beg for him to forgive him - of course friendships are more important than hook-ups, but after last time... and the way stan had stood up for you when richie was being mean... you'd hoped things would be different with him. 

because you think you've loved stan for a long time. 

"anyways, he has to learn to accept that i have feelings for his sister. i'm not going to sacrifice my happiness just because he's acting like a child, or that he's mad that i spend all my time thinking about you." 

your head snaps up to him and your eyes widen, heart soaring at his words. "wh-wait what?" you ask, suddenly shy. "you-" you just smile, not knowing what to say. stan shrugs, as if it's as simple as saying the sky is blue. 

"i think about you all the time, y/n. i like you as more than a friend, more than just a good fuck. i want to be yours, i want you to be mine. always have." 

you smile so big you think your face may split in two. "i think about you too, stan. haven't stopped in a few years. i missed you last week." 

"then can i take you out?" he asks boldly. "promise i'll hold your hand and buy you dinner." 

"he'll kill us." you say, looking into stan's bright honey eyes. they're full of confidence and mischief and you think he's absolutely irresistible. stan's large hand finds purchase on your waist lightly as he smiles, "has that ever really scared you, y/n?" he asks. 

you smile as you take his hand. "of course not." 

he kisses your forehead as you step towards him, his arm pulling you closer and releasing hordes of butterflies in your stomach. "think we should go visit him at work? order a shake with one straw and make out in the corner booth?" stan asks, the light catching the purple and yellow skin of his fading bruise.

you laugh as you walk towards his car, shoving him a bit. "you're an asshole." you say, butterflies rampant. his laugh makes you warm and he leans towards you. "you can say that all you want, but i know you've had a crush on me since we were kids." he teases. 

you roll your eyes. "you're really testing me, uris." 

"it's okay, tozier. i think you're beautiful even when you're mad." he says, pecking you on your nose. "well you better get used to it, i guess." you mutter, and he chuckles a bit as he kisses your forehead. 

"i will never get tired of you, no matter what you do or what your brother thinks." 

tag list: 

@gabiatthedisco @blisshemmings @stenbrozier @sft-core @clownsloveyou @moon-shine-baby @daughter-of-the-stars11 @trashedfortozier @oceandog13 @kait16xo @upamongthestarss @fiantomartell @beverlyparkerr @beauregard-s @diorbubs @leighjaenikhowell @cowbellies @deepestofwaters @psykronium-cube @ruefulposts @letmereid @topper-mostofthepopper-most

© all content belongs to soulwillower 2020. do not modify, repost, or redistribute

#stanley uris smut #stanley uris x reader #losers club x reader #losers x reader #richie tozier x reader #beverly marsh x reader #mike hanlon x reader #eddie kaspbrak x reader #bill denbrough x reader #ben hanscom x reader

[comfyswitcherblanketfort]

Sensate Focus

A bitch takes one Human Sexuality class and gets stuck on the fucking Sensate Focus bullshit then has to write a fic about it. Its me. I’m the bitch. 😂

Warnings: Geralt is self depriciating-whats new, insecure jask, insecure geralt, overwhelmed by touch, big vulnerability, they’re in couple’s therapy, so like, its a rocky relationship, we got some connection building and cuteness in the end too, its not all bad, mentions of sex, nudity but like not in a smutty way, for once I dont think i used a single swear word? I had big feels while writing it i really hope they translated lmao.

I am but a humble psych major, not an actual therapist, so plz don’t come at me if shit isn’t accurate. I tried my best.

Also this is under a cut for a reason, not just length. If you are easily triggered by touch starved type fics this is not for you. It gets emotionally heavy plz read with caution.  

____________________________

“You want us to what?” 

“Come on, Geralt. You said you’d try.”

“I- no. Just- why? What’s the point?”

Both Geralt and Jaskier turned to their therapist, each equally confused and a little scared. 

The tiny woman kept her face completely impassive and answered his question, “The exercise helps people get out of their heads and reacquaint themselves with, not only being open with their partner, but also slowing down and enjoying touch for touch sake. Without being so focused on the end goal of sex or pleasing a partner, people can begin to refocus on the connection attachment theorists claim is the underlying motivation for sex without reproduction in the first place.”

Geralt swallowed hard. This was for him and he knew it. He’d said it himself, he was fucking terrified of failure and rejection and that absolutely extended to Jaskier. His husband. Of five years. Who’d been with him for ten. Logically it made no fucking sense, but the woman with the PhD had told him this was rather normal for a child of divorce as if he’d said he didn’t like horseradish sauce. He didn’t see how being scared of your spouse secretly hating you was normal in the slightest. 

He glanced over at Jaskier who sat at the other end of the black leather sofa picking at his nails. When they’d gotten married they’d laze around all day just holding each other and talking. It was safe and sweet and Geralt couldn’t for the life of him remember how it was tainted.

“Alright,” he grunted, “What’re the rules again?”

-

The next afternoon they’d carved out an hour and a half with no distractions, no phones, not even any music to Jaskier’s dismay. Apparently that was against the ‘guidelines - not rules’. 

They stood in their bedroom, lights dimmed and curtains drawn, as much for the ambiance as for the privacy. Geralt felt his stomach flip flop as he stepped out of his clothes, feeling a bit ridiculous. It’s not as if this was the first time they’d seen each other naked, but it was the first time they were to spend ‘as much time as necessary’ -whatever that meant- touching each other, one at a time. 

Jaskier dropped his clothes in the laundry bin and stood with his arms crossed, almost like he was hiding, “Right. So… Do you want to go first? Maybe go over things again?”

“Do you want to go first?” Geralt asked, immediately drawing his bottom lip between his teeth to gnaw at the peeling skin. 

“I just want to know why you look so scared, to be honest,” Jaskier breathed. 

Geralt took a deep breath, reminding himself that he wasn’t the only one being vulnerable here, “Not scared. Just nervous.”

“Rules then?”

Geralt nodded, “No talking. No, uh, erogenous zones. No sex. No kissing. If you don’t like something or it’s a big turn on or it tickles, move the other person’s hand.” the weight in his chest lessened a little bit, this really was simple. Just touching Jask. Something he’d done a million times. Hell he might not even get anything out of it. He didn’t need to be so damned worried about things going wrong. 

“If you get overwhelmed think about temperature and texture and how it feels. Don’t think about what the other person is thinking or feeling. The only bit that matters is moving their hand,” Jaskier added, his posture relaxing ever so slightly as he rocked up on his toes and back down.

Geralt stepped a little closer, holding out his pinky finger, “We don’t stay still if we don’t like something.” He said it more to reassure Jaskier than anything. 

Jask hooked his pinky around Geralt’s and smiled, “No barreling through,” he agreed. 

“Can I, uhm… go first?” Geralt kept their pinkies hooked together as he let their hands hang between them. 

Jaskier looked surprised, but nodded fervently, “Of course!”

“Okay,” Geralt pulled his hand back and ran it through his hair before stepping a bit closer, hovering both of his hands over jaskier’s shoulders, “So I just-?”

Jaskier nodded and whispered, “No talking, love.” 

Geralt let out an amused huff, the irony of the words bringing a soft smile to his face. He took a deep breath in and slowly let it out as he placed his hands over Jaskier’s arms. 

Sensations. He could do this. He was doing this.

Jaskier’s arms were soft, both in texture and in feel, giving way to Geralt’s fingers ever so slightly when he squeezed. He trailed his hands down over Jaskier’s elbows, noting the patches of dry skin over the joints that Jask had been scandalized by in college. His forearms had more hair, but it was softer than Geralt’s, silky even, and nice to touch. Geralt trailed his fingers down Jaskier’s wrist and back up, watching as the little hairs stood on end but seemed to stick to the pads of his fingers as he moved past them. When he noticed the goosebumps he glanced up to Jaskier with mild panic in his eyes, worried he’d already fucked it up and made him uncomfortable. But his husband just nodded, a light smile on his lips. 

Temperature. Back to task.

Geralt picked up Jaskier’s hand, holding it in one of his as he skimmed his fingers over his knuckles and calluses. His palms were warmer than the back of his hand and it seemed every spot where his skin had built up from use was just a tad colder than the thinner skin next to it. 

He gently guided Jaskier’s hand back down and trailed his hand up his arm, ghosting his fingers over his collar bone. He thought about how much softer this skin was, and how it made the butterflies in his stomach go wild as he moved back and forth over the spot a few times. He liked the pleasant little pitfall of his stomach, not arousal but not unlike it, just a little higher in his abdomen and lighter. He moved his other hand to mirror his movement’s on Jaskier’s other shoulder, palms soon coming to rest over his chest almost on their own. 

Geralt was so aware of his hands they almost felt numb. It made him think of one of those motor skills brain maps where it showed how much of your brain was devoted to moving which part of your body. Those huge chunks devoted to his hands must have been screaming. 

Jaskier gasped as a bit of his chest hair got caught in Geralt’s ring as he swept his hands downward. Geralt gave him an apologetic look but just got a grin and slight shake of his head in return instead of the shock he expected. 

Geralt continued, moving his hands in slow circles over Jaskier’s abdomen and hips and flanks, marveling at the warmth he felt not only under his hands but spreading through his chest. He let his hands rest above Jaskier’s hips, just at the bottom of his ribs and watched as his hands slowly moved apart and back together in time with Jaskier’s breath. It looked like such a small movement, but when he closed his eyes he felt like he was throwing his arms wide open. He tried matching his breathing to Jaskier’s, but that was close to overwhelming, so he moved on, refocusing on the texture and thickness of his chest hair as he moved up to his neck. 

One of his hands stayed resting on Jaskier’s chest as his other brushed up the side of his neck with the backs of his fingers. Even with such light pressure he could feel the thick ropes of muscle and tendons under his skin. It was warmer over his pulse point and Geralt’s breath hitched when he felt the little thump of a heartbeat under his fingers. He closed his eyes for a moment, surprised to find himself taking a deep breath, not out of fear or frustration, but to sink into the feeling as much as he could. He counted the beats, making a note of how comforting the feeling was. The longer he held his fingers in place, the softer the beats became, until they leveled out to a soft and steady thrum. 

When Geralt opened his eyes the beats picked up, matching the strange look on Jaskier’s face. Geralt moved his hand over his jaw and back a few times. He could almost hear the ridges of his fingerprints catching on Jaskier’s stubble as he traced over his upper lip. 

He felt a soothing sense of familiarity when his fingers grazed along the outline of Jaskier’s lips. His body latched onto the feeling and he found himself starting to get watery eyes as he reacquainted himself with the thin pink skin. He remembered their first kiss and how much it scared him even though he craved it so completely. He remembered kissing Jaskier over and over and over when they’d finally said ‘i love you’ and dropped the casual pretense. He remembered their kiss at their wedding, soft, firm, and a little wet with happy tears. 

An annoying voice that sounded an awful lot like their therapist sounded off in his head, “This is what I was trying to tell you, asshat. Focus on the positive.” 

Geralt smiled despite the sharp tug behind his eyes that told him he might cry, and brushed his fingers up over the thin skin beneath Jaskier’s eyes, careful not to press hard enough to catch and pull at the blueish skin. He traced his eyebrows, the bridge of his nose, his cheekbones and hollows, his chin, and his cupid’s bow, all with that same surprisingly pleasant near-tears feeling in his chest. He watched Jaskier’s eyes watching him as he carded one hand through his hair. 

That was what did it, what made the tears start to dribble down his cheeks as his hands continued to gently comb through his husband’s hair. The look of wonder and relief he was met with was overwhelming. He felt a bit of guilt, sure. Guilt for letting things get as bad as they’d been, but he was overwhelmed by how much love he felt. It permeated his whole body and the air around him. He hadn’t even felt this in the beginning; this was a settled and sure feeling, not the frantic need he’d felt before. 

Geralt pressed their foreheads together and closed his eyes, sending a fresh wave of tears over his cheeks as he brushed his hands over Jaskier’s back. He traced his spine, counted every rib, and outlined his shoulder blades with the tips of his fingers. 

Their fronts were pressed together, but technically it wasn’t against any rule, so neither of them moved back. Geralt’s hands moved to the dip in Jaskier’s hips, his thumbs brushing over the place where his skin creased when he sat and Jaskier wrapped his hands around his wrists. A warm puff of air washed over Geralt’s face as Jaskier breathed a small laugh and moved his hands up. Surprisingly enough, Geralt was only amused by being moved, filing the information away for later as he settled for measuring Jaskier’s breaths again, now leaning into the full body tingle he felt when they both exhaled. 

He wanted to stay right there for hours, but he suddenly wanted Jaskier to touch him. More than that, he wanted Jaskier to feel like him. He gave his sides a gentle squeeze as he straightened up and rocked back a bit, making the smallest bit of space between them.

“Switch,” he whispered, the soft sound coming out like crunching gravel in the charged silence. 

He let his hands fall to his sides as he opened his eyes, a little relieved to see he wasn’t the only one crying. 

Jaskier immediately reached up to cup Geralt’s cheeks and brush the tears away. It was odd, having to stay still when Jask was right there, when he could still feel the echoes of the sensations in his hands. But he stayed put, if for nothing else than the look of cautious excitement Jaskier was wearing. 

He wanted to tell him there was no need, that he would gladly spend the rest of the day standing in the dim light of their bedroom, silently taking turns softly caressing each other. But rules were rules.

Jaskier drew his hands a little closer together over his cheeks, making sure all the tears were smudged away with his thumbs as Geralt’s eyes fluttered shut. The warmth of his hands was soothing, especially when Jaskier slowly brushed his thumbs over Geralt’s eyelids. As Jaskier dragged his fingers over Geralt’s chin and brushed the backs of his fingers back up and over his cheeks, Geralt almost started to feel dizzy. He forced his eyes open and focused on watching Jaskier’s face. 

His tongue stuck out between his lips as his hands fluttered down his nose and to his lips. A wistful smile graced his features as he brushed over the chapped skin, pulling his bottom lip down just enough so when he let go it popped when it jumped back up to meet his top lip. Geralt tried not to smile, wanting him to do it again, but raised an eyebrow. Jaskier openly grinned and popped his lip a few more times before smoothing his thumb over it. He tucked some hair behind Geralt’s ear and cupped his hands around the base of his neck, gently pressing his thumbs into the tense muscles. 

A shiver ran down Geralt’s back as Jaskier brushed his hands out and over his shoulders, thumbing circles over the points where muscle just barely covered bone. Geralt watched his eyes, watched the little crows feet get deeper when he smiled and watched his brows lift up and together. 

It occurred to him then that Jaskier might have been just as lonely as he was, that the exuberant extrovert he’d married wanted this as badly as he did. It truly never crossed his mind until he saw it written plain as day on Jaskier’s face; he wasn’t the only one with insecurities in their relationship. 

Every bone in his body wanted to pick Jaskier up and crush him to his chest. The trails of goosebumps his fingers left over his skin made it even harder not to, but Jask was enjoying this. He’d even go so far as to say he was lost in it. Rules be damned, Geralt couldn’t take this away from him if he’d wanted to. 

When Jaskier’s hands ghosted over his navel he shivered and let his eyes flutter closed. If he wasn’t going to break and move he should at least lean into it.

However, being held without expectations, without needing, or even being allowed, to do or say anything in return was beginning to seem overwhelming. How had Jaskier just stood there and watched him? How could anyone just stand and constantly be told with the light brush of someone else’s knuckles over their cheek that they were desired and cherished? When the hands pressed to his chest told him over and over that he was loved, what kind of escape was there? 

One of Jaskier’s hands once again brushed his tears away and he leaned into it, lip trembling as he looked up at the ceiling trying to compose himself. Jaskier would have none of it, gently tilting his head down until their noses brushed and he was forced to look into his watery blue eyes. 

He needed this. Geralt was terrified but Jaskier’s expression spoke of a yearning that ran so deep even he probably couldn’t put a name to it. Geralt licked his lips and offered a watery smile, feeling warm relief when Jaskier smiled back and ran his hands down his arms to rest behind his elbows. He squeezed the meat behind his arms, the tops of his forearms, the tendons in his wrist, making his fingers involuntarily curl. Geralt didn’t move, he barely breathed, as Jaskier watched his own hands roam over Geralt’s like he’d never seen anything like it. 

When he stopped trying to run the sensation faded to a dull roar. Jaskier’s hands were warm and his breath across his skin was gentle. Geralt might even admit he felt a little bit worthy of the adoration in his husband’s eyes after a few minutes. 

Jaskier’s touches were light in some places, firm and grounding in others. Like when he circled his arms around Geralt and pressed his palms into the small of his back, resting his forehead where his collar bones met. Geralt had no idea how something so simple could make him feel so weak. He knew it wasn’t entirely true, but it felt like the only thing holding him up was Jaskier’s touch. When he rocked back, even if it was only an inch or so, Geralt had to fight not to follow him.

Jaskier rested his hands over his ribs, just above his elbows, and stared into his eyes. 

They’d agreed to say ‘end’ with their therapist. That’s what Geralt was waiting for. So when Jaskier whispered ‘enough’ and gave him a gentle squeeze it was all he could do to bite down on his lip and keep quiet. Of course he would say enough. The one word Geralt had struggled with from day one. Being enough always felt impossible, but he could begin to think of it as a bit more attainable standing in their dim bedroom without a sound in the world other than their breathing. 

He nodded and they both picked up their notepads and scribbled down the notes they were supposed to. Geralt’s was just a list of words but he didn’t care, he filled most of the page and chucked it on the bedside table before tugging on his sweats. 

When he looked up for Jaskier he found him staring at him, worry on his brow and pen hovering over what looked like a second nearly full page. 

“Do you, maybe want some tea while you write?”

He licked his lips and nodded, adjusting the blanket wrapped around his shoulders before going back to frantically scratching words onto his page. 

Geralt gently closed the door after him and took a deep shaky breath as he padded into their bright kitchen, running his hands through his hair. The kettle seemed to take forever with how fast his mind was racing, replaying every bit he could to lodge it in his memory. 

Jaskier was just closing his notebook and setting it on top of his laptop when he opened the door with his foot, careful not to spill any hot liquid on the carpet. 

“Thank you,” Jaskier whispered, taking his cup and sitting at the foot of the bed. 

Geralt joined him and draped an arm over his blanket wrapped shoulders, “Of course.”

They slurped at their mugs in silence until Geralt was able to take a full sip without scalding the roof of his mouth. 

Jaskier’s voice was soft as he spoke, the air from his words interrupting the steam drifting up from his mug, “Can I ask you something?”

“Mhm,” Geralt leaned in just a hair. 

“Why did you look up?” Jaskier rested his head on Geralt’s shoulder as he asked and it took Geralt a moment to remember he was supposed to answer.

“I…” he took a deep breath to pull his words together before he mis-stepped, “You stood still and watched me, and looked happy… and I wanted to do that for you… but I started crying again and I-hm. I didn’t want you to think I didn’t want to be there-here. Wherever.”

One of Jaskier’s hands drifted from his mug to Geralt’s thigh, “I was just worried.”

“Didn’t translate, huh?” Geralt asked, giving him a light squeeze. 

“Not quite,” Jaskier chirped, almost giggling. 

Geralt hummed and pressed a kiss to the top of Jaskier’s head, “I’m sorry.” 

“S’okay. Now I know.”

There were a few more moments of silence before Geralt chuckled, “I didn’t realize your hips were so ticklish.” 

Jaskier snorted, an attempt at sipping his tea absolutely aborted to save a spill, “I’ve never been ticklish, Geralt.”

Geralt set his tea on his knee and tilted Jaskier’s chin up to look at him, suddenly concerned, “What didn’t you like about me touching your hips?”

Jaskier’s goofy smile turned a little sly, “Absolutely nothing. In fact,” he started, taking both their half finished teas and setting them on the window sill before turning to envelop Geralt in the blanket with him, pulling him down onto the bed, “I liked it a bit too much.”

#geraskier #geraskier in couples therapy #geraskier go to therapy #geraskier snuggles #geraskier intimacy #geraskier fluff #geraskier fic #geraskier fanfic #soft geraskier #Geralt of rivia #geralt #geralt fic #insecure geralt #touch starved geralt #overwhelmed geralt #jaskier #jullian alfred pankratz #insecure jaskier #lonely jaskier #sensate focus #is this weird? maybe #was it cathartic? absolutely #listen #i just want them to communicate in a way that works for them and each get what they need out of the relationship okay??? #i have a lot of feelings about this #the witcher #the witcher fic #the witcher fanfic #soft witcher

[hartigays]

rafe taking barry to a fancy kook party👀

“but you’re still coming, right?”

rafe is pacing back and forth in his room, gnawing on his lip with his phone pressed to his ear.

“sho’ thang, country club,” barry says from the other end, and rafe can immediately tell that he’s fucking blasted already.

it’s four in the afternoon.

but that’s fine, great even. the less barry tries, the better. that’s the whole point, after all. to make everyone but himself as uncomfortable as humanly possible at tonight’s fundraiser or gala or whatever shit his family is hosting.

rafe can never be bothered to remember.

barry maybe possibly perhaps could be a minor casualty in this little endeavor, when it comes to ward at least. it’s not enough to deter rafe - he’ll just. make it up to barry later, or whatever, if it’s a problem. that’s what normal people do, right? just do whatever the fuck you want then ask for forgiveness later. or something like that.

rafe can’t be bothered to remember timeless sayings or what the fuck ever, either.

“wear something- ” rafe pauses, effectively cutting himself off. he was about to tell barry to wear something nice out of habit (the words were even thought in ward’s voice. rafe can feel a vein start to pulse in his forehead). “wear whatever you want. and be late. bring the bike.”

barry is quiet for a moment, and rafe doesn’t know why, but he feels like barry is doing that small half-smile dimple thing that makes rafe feel all wobbly inside.

probably because, as rafe remembers with sudden clarity, barry lives for drama just as much as rafe. it’s kind of why they’re fooling around behind everyone’s backs in the first place.

sure, barry is nice to look at and decent in bed and blah blah blah, but the best part about their relationship is the knowledge of how much it’d cripple people if they knew about it. people like ward cameron, for example.

rafe thinks barry is just as interested as him in seeing ward’s head burst like a grape after seeing them together for the first time. although rafe is pretty sure that’s more because barry just wants their relationship to be public, and he doesn’t really give a shit one way or another how it happens.

ward’s head turning purple from stress is just, like, the cherry on top of the whole shit cake.

“heard,” is all barry says in response to rafe’s requests (or demands, depending on how you look at it) before hanging up.

rafe exhales slowly, running a hand through his hair. he turns towards his mirror, smoothing a hand over the shirt that he’d stolen from barry’s closet earlier this morning.

he’d wanted to stay at barry’s all day and convince him that they should go to the fundraiser together instead of just meeting each other there, but rafe never even got a chance to suggest it, only getting so far as asking barry if he could go at all. because barry had to work, the busy fuck.

when he’s not working, he’s dealing nonstop. when he’s not dealing, he’s busy making rafe’s life miserable by filling him with all sorts of stupid mushy feelings that have him missing barry when he’s gone. it’s disgusting, and he despises the fact that he loves it so much.

but he’ll make an exception, because it’s barry. always because it’s barry.

that doesn’t mean that rafe has to fill barry in on all of his plans, necessarily. he can just invite him places and vaguely allude to the real reason for the invite without actually saying it and barry can either go along with it or not.

at least in this situation, barry is seemingly okay with being conned into going to a cameron family event for more reasons than just being rafe’s - well, they hadn’t exactly settled on barry being his date.

rafe had simply asked barry to go and barry had simply said yes.

after barry left for work, rafe had raided his wardrobe, and he’s been wearing the ratty t-shirt ever since. it smells like barry, and rafe wants to smother himself in it.

he also wants to show up tonight in it, just to make things that much worse for ward.

so, rafe does.

sarah’s eyes bug out of her head when she sees him. she opens her mouth when he breezes past her, but he doesn’t stop to listen to whatever she has to say.

rafe can deal with whatever sarah throws at him later. right now, he’s setting a plan in motion and can’t afford to be distracted.

by the time the party is in full swing, rafe has yet to make it into ward’s line of sight, and barry is late. which was the plan, but barry’s almost too late.

the speeches have long since passed, and everyone is either dancing or mingling at this point. his chance to crash the party on-stage, an idea he’d been toying with, comes and goes as the hours pass.

rafe had kind of been hoping he could make a scene.

in the end, he sort of gets his wish.

barry comes strolling in when the party is starting to wind down. he reeks like he smoked a blunt on the way over - rafe can smell it wafting off of him as he storms over.

“are you fucking kidding me?” rafe snaps, ignoring the way barry is eyeing his shirt.

“that mine?” he asks, one brow arched.

rafe looks down at his shirt, then back up at barry, glaring. “yes? whatever. shut up. i had a plan. would it have literally fucking killed you to show up on time?”

“shit, baby boy. you said be late,” barry snorts, rolling his eyes. “ain’t i late?”

“you missed- ” rafe snaps again, an octave higher, before cutting his response short and pinching the bridge of his nose. “i didn’t say this late.”

“pretty sure i don’t remember hearin’ you specify, country club.”

which is fair, rafe was vague for a reason, and perhaps it backfired on him a little. but whatever, he’s mad at barry anyway and there’s not much he can do about that, except, well. be mad.

“i had a whole goddamn thing i was going to do,” rafe bitches. “and you missed it.”

barry glances around, eyeing the rather quiet crowd starting to notice their little display. for a moment, it looks like he wants to pull rafe outside for some privacy. but he must see something on rafe’s face, because his expression shifts, and then he’s grinning like a shark.

“ain’t i tell you to quit takin’ my shit?” barry asks, suddenly taking the argument in a new direction. “the fuck i give a shit about being late for when you taking all my damn clothes?”

rafe glances around at the crowd, noting sarah eyeing him from the corner of the room. and next to her, ward.

staring right at rafe, looking murderous. it’s entirely too good, and rafe could kiss barry.

but there’ll be time for that in - well. in like, the next minute, but rafe is determined to draw this out at least a little bit.

“maybe don’t ruin my clothes in the first place and i won’t have to steal yours,” rafe tosses back.

he’s pleased to see barry’s cheeks turn pink - just a little bit.

and then, “you want me to ruin some more? keep stealin’ my shit, that’s what’s gonna happen, princess.”

barry dangles the bait in front of rafe so nicely, he really can’t help but take it.

“i do, actually,” rafe says, then adds, thoughtfully, “wanna take this argument somewhere else?”

“shit, country club. i didn’t know you was such a romantic.”

rafe will certainly show him romantic, if that’s what he wants. only because rafe gets a whole hell of a lot more out of it, too.

he kisses barry right there in front of the whole crowd, with purpose. like it’s the last thing he’ll be able to do.

based on the color of ward’s face, it just might be.

barry grabs the front of rafe’s shirt - or, well, barry’s shirt, technically - and hauls him in closer, kissing him deeper. barry always kisses him like it’s the first time - like he’s constantly discovering something he never knew existed, and now he can’t get enough of it.

rafe is utterly consumed by it. he feels like he’s burning from the inside out, like he’s being stripped bare in front of the universe itself, and he wants to drown himself in it.

“get me out of here and i’ll show you just how romantic i can be,” rafe breathes against barry’s lips, his fingers still knotted in his hair.

barry bumps their foreheads together before extracting himself from rafe’s embrace, barely sparing his surroundings a glance before dragging rafe right back through the front doors. rafe hears the heavy wood shut behind them.

he feels like he’s snorted the fattest line in history when he climbs onto the back of barry’s bike, hearing it roar to life. rafe pulls his helmet on and wraps his arms around barry’s middle, slipping his fingers under the hem of barry’s shirt.

just a touch to tide him over. just until they can get back to barry’s trailer.

it isn’t until they’re speeding out of the parking lot that ward storms outside, shouting something at them from the front steps. it’s completely inaudible, but rafe looks back in time to see the look on ward’s face. his expression alone speaks volumes.

rafe surprisingly finds that, in the grand scheme of things, he doesn’t really give a fuck either way.

#rafebarry #outer banks #i don’t like this but i also didn’t like any of the other versions either lmao #i don’t even know if it’s COHERENT but here it is #i feel like it’s way too fanon rafe for my tastes eugh but i just couldn’t get the vibes right idk #hopefully this is somewhat readable i’m sorry 😭 #my fics #ask #anon

[drabbles-mc]

Compromising Positions

Juice Ortiz x F!Reader

Request by @adela-topaz-caelon: So, seeing your Juice post just now, I got another idea (oops) if it's okay to send another. I was thinking a Juice x Female reader, who gets super defensive over him, gets teased over it a lot, but goes absolutely ape shit at the guys when she finds out they stapled a sign to his chest when he accidentally drugged himself to sleep. And then after she goes ape, threatening to staple some bitches, she cleans him up and maybe some sudden release of emotions and pooooossibly smut? ^_^ maybe :D

Warnings: language, mentions of blood/injuries

Word Count: 2.7k

A/N: Being ready to pop off in defense of Juice is a sentiment that I can totally get behind, so thank you for this request lmao. I didn’t end up going the smutty route because I just didn’t feel like it fit the whole mood of this story. But fear not! There will be other fics for our boy in the future that take care of that haha. Hope you enjoy!

SOA Taglist: @masterlistforimagines @mijop @garbinge @xladymacbethx @kkim120 @multiyfandomgirl40 @i-just-read-stuff @chibsytelford (Let me know if you’d like to be tagged!)

You tried to tune out the conversations of the guys as you wiped down the surface of the bar. They’d hardly been out of church for five minutes and they had already completely moved past everything that they had been talking about behind closed doors. You loved them all but you would be lying if you said that listening to the way that they spoke about things sometimes didn’t get underneath your skin a little bit. You’d learned to pick your battles wisely because there was only so much that you could be frustrated about all the time.

Out of the corner of your eye, you saw one of the guys reach over and give Juice a light smack to the back of his head. You looked up, eyes instantly zeroing in on what was going on. It wasn’t shocking to you that it was Tig who was doling out the abuse—that seemed to be a large part of their relationship with each other.

Juice never seemed overly bothered by it whenever the guys would rag on him. You wished that you were as good at brushing it off as he was, but every time you saw them picking on him it made your blood boil. For that reason alone you knew that your feelings towards Juice were no secret, and the guys went in on you about it just as much as they went in on Juice for everything else. It seemed like the only person who never picked on you for how you felt about Juice was Juice himself. He never said anything about it one way or the other.

“Look out, Tig,” Jax spoke up with a laugh, “keep that up and you’re about to catch some hands from someone else.”

Your frustration must’ve been instantly apparent on your face. You made a concentrated effort to relax your features, but it wasn’t much use. Shaking your head silently, you returned your attention to the bar.

“Go on, then, Y/N,” Tig said with a cocky laugh, “If you got something to say then say it.”

You didn’t lift your eyes, knowing that getting into it right now wasn’t going to accomplish anything. Juice spoke up on your behalf, though, “Leave her alone, Tig. She’s just trying to work without having to listen to you guys talk shit all the time.”

“Funny how she only seems to get uptight when it’s about one person in parti—”

“Are you done?” you cut him off.

Tig held his hands up in mock surrender, “Sure, doll,” he turned to Juice, “Should start bringing her with you on runs. Maybe she can keep you safe out there, too.”

You gnawed at the inside of your cheek to keep yourself from saying something that would undoubtedly make the situation worse. You tossed your cleaning rag onto the surface of the bar before turning and walking towards the door of the clubhouse. Without missing a beat, you swiped a pack of cigarettes off of one of the tables as you went. You could hear the guys murmuring behind you but you blocked it out.

You were lost in your thoughts, camped out on the picnic table outside the clubhouse, when someone came and sat down next to you. Glancing over, you saw that it was Juice. You didn’t have to fully look at him to know the expression that he had on his face. It was the same one that he always had whenever the guys gave you a hard time—a mixture of pity and being flattered.

You shook your head slightly, “You don’t need to check on me, Juice. I can handle them.”

“You realize I can handle them too, right?” he gave your shoulder a playful nudge with his own.

Despite your annoyance, you smiled as you took a drag from the cigarette between your fingers. You let yourself make full eye contact with him, “I never said that you couldn’t.”

You passed him your cigarette and he took it with a smile. The two of you didn’t say anything else about what had just happened, opting to just sit and enjoy each other’s company silently. Juice was one of the few people in the world that you could enjoy silence with, and you knew that in moments like this when you were cooling off from being frustrated, it was truly a blessing to have him around.

A few days ticked by and you managed to not get yourself into any more arguments with Tig or any of the other guys. Every now and then when things were getting a little rowdy in the clubhouse you could feel the guys looking at you, waiting for you to speak up and insert yourself into the middle of it. It took some conscious effort on your part, but you stayed out of it.

You were just starting to get ready for your next shift at the bar when you heard the door to the clubhouse open. You didn’t look up at first, too immersed in everything that you were doing to try and straighten up a little bit. The only thing that caught your attention was the quiet groan that filled the room.

Looking up, your eyes went wide when you saw Juice. You had so many questions but you weren’t sure if you really wanted answers to any of them. You went to walk up to him to offer a helping hand but he waved you off as he walked back to his dorm. Every fiber of your being was telling you to follow him, but you didn’t. Part of you knew that you weren’t going to get any answers from him, so instead you stormed in the opposite direction from him to find the other guys.

You flung the clubhouse door open and were greeted by the sight of the guys huddled around the table, all laughing and joking around. You had a feeling that you knew exactly what they found to be so funny.

“What the fuck did you do this time?” you made a direct line for Tig.

“Whoa, whoa,” he laughed as he took a step back from you, “why do you assume that it was me?”

“You telling me it wasn’t?”

“Depends on what you’re talking about.”

“What the hell happened to Juice?”

“Maybe you should keep a better eye on your boy, Y/N,” Jax said, trying and failing to stifle his laughter, “and he wouldn’t land himself in such…compromising positions.”

You weren’t naïve enough to think that Juice couldn’t get himself into difficult situations on his own. He didn’t always think things through. But you also knew that when he was putting himself in sketchy situations, the guys were the first ones to try and capitalize on it.

“Alright then, VP,” you turned your attention to Jax, “what did he land himself into this time?”

“Your boy knocked himself the fuck out. Thought he was taking vitamins when he…wasn’t. That’s on him for popping whatever gets put into his hands,” Jax was shaking his head as he spoke.

“That doesn’t explain why he walked into the clubhouse practically naked and bleeding.”

“The blood was probably from the staples,” Tig chimed in with a laugh.

“The what?” you managed to keep your voice below a yell, but barely.

He continued to laugh as he motioned for Chibs to hand you the sign that had been discarded onto the table, most likely tossed there by Juice when he finally made his way back to the clubhouse. You snatched it from the man’s hands, unfolding it and reading what it said. As you continued to put the entire situation together, you saw red for a moment.

“You stapled this to his fucking chest?” you folded the sign in half and proceeded to start hitting Tig in the head and chest with it, “What the fuck is the matter with you?”

“Jesus Christ,” Tig was holding his hands up to try and block the onslaught of slaps coming his way.

“Y/N,” Jax reached to grab your arm to stop you and you ripped it from his grasp.

You turned back to him, not afraid to go toe-to-toe with the VP. He might’ve held an office in the club, but he was just another blonde biker at the bar as far as you were concerned, especially in this moment.

You shoved the sign into his chest, pushing him back in the process, “What? You got some smart shit to say?”

“You’re making a bigger deal out of this than you need to. Juicy is a grown man, he can handle his own shit.”

“You think it’s not a big deal?” you stepped in close to him, “You put two staples in his goddamn chest and you think it’s not a big deal?” you shoved him once more for good measure, “Get me a goddamn staplegun! We’ll see how big of a deal it is when I’m drilling shit into your chest!” you shook your head, “I swear to fucking god, Jax, I should put some staples into your fuckin—”

You stopped short when you felt a hand land on your shoulder. You whipped around, ready to fight, but you were met with Juice’s eyes. He was still going without a shirt, but he’d taken the time to go put pants on. You were assuming that he could hear your rage from inside the clubhouse and it prompted him to come outside. There was a glint of amusement in his eyes and you would’ve been more enamored with it if you weren’t still focused on the two wounds that were bleeding on his chest.

“C’mon,” Juice tried to redirect you back towards the clubhouse, “it’s fine, Y/N. I’m alright.”

You turned back around, staring daggers at all the guys, but mostly Jax and Tig, “This isn’t over with,” you huffed and shook your head, “Motherfuckers.”

Before you could say anything else, Juice started nudging you back towards the door. You were grumbling underneath your breath as Juice continued to usher you into the building. When you were inside and it was just the two of you, you turned to him and let the anger fade away slightly.

“What the fuck is the matter with them?”

He laughed and shook his head, “We’re all a little fucked up. Can’t just hold it against them.”

“I’ll be mad at you later, don’t worry,” you sighed, unable to pry your eyes away from his injuries, “At least let me clean you up a little? I’m no doctor but I feel like I could still help you out a little bit.”

He smiled and nodded, glad that he had a way to pacify you a little bit for the time being. The last thing he wanted to be dealing with was you going on a rampage with a staplegun. You went and dug out your first aid kit from behind the bar before following him back to his dorm. The two of you sat on the edge of his bed. You wanted to stay completely focused on the task at hand but you were only human. You chastised yourself for your wandering thoughts.

“Considering you took a bunch of mystery pills,” you said with a slight shake of your head as you laid out your supplies, “you don’t look too worse for wear.”

“You’re just saying that to make me feel better,” he chuckled as he watched your calculated, meticulous movements.

“Trying to sweeten you up because cleaning out these cuts is gonna hurt like a bitch,” you managed a smile, “Don’t want you to end up hating me too much.”

“You don’t have to worry about that.”

You tried to ignore the heat rising in your face as you set about cleaning the torn skin on his chest. He cringed and cursed under his breath when you swabbed the cuts with alcohol. You fought the urge to apologize but it was difficult.

You were leaning in close enough to feel his breath on the side of your neck. It was taking all of your self-control to stay focused on placing bandages on him. Your hands begged you to let them wander but you kept it together. When you pulled away and looked at Juice, there was something in his expression that made you feel like he was reading every thought that had been crossing your brain as you worked.

“What?” you tried to sound less nervous than you really were as you started to put your medical supplies away.

“Were you really about to threaten to put staples in Jax’s dick?” he couldn’t keep his laughter in any longer.

You smiled as you set your first aid kit off to the side, “I sure fucking was.”

“Felt like you really meant it.”

You waited for his eyes to meet yours, “I did.”

He laughed, draping his arm around your shoulders and pulling you against his side, “I know I spend a lot of time telling you not to worry about the guys, but I hope you know it is nice to know that someone has my back.”

You nodded as you tried to focus on both the feeling of warmth coming from his body and the words he was saying, “Of course. I’ll go after anyone with a staplegun for you. No questions asked.”

He chuckled before leaning in and pressing a kiss against your temple. You nearly melted into a puddle in his arms at the contact. He let his lips linger against your skin for a moment, “Thank you.”

You rested your hand on his thigh, allowing yourself to lean completely into him. His arm wrapped tighter around you and you smiled as your cheek rested against the bare skin of his chest, careful to not touch the bandages you had just dressed him with.

“Y/N?”

“Mhm?”

When he didn’t say anything else, you pulled away so you could look at him. There was a small smirk tugging at the edges of his lips as he looked at you. Your eyes searched his, trying to figure out just what he was thinking.

His free hand came up and rested on the side of your face, and you instantly leaned into his touch. The palm of his hand was rough and calloused, but despite that you couldn’t deny that it felt like it was in its rightful place resting against your cheek. Your eyes fluttered shut as you soaked up the moment. Juice chuckled quietly, not expecting you to react so quickly and comfortably.

It gave him a little boost of confidence as he leaned in and pressed his forehead against yours. You opened your eyes, smiling as your heart began to speed up inside your chest.

“Wanna know what would really make me feel better?” you could hear that he was trying not to laugh as he spoke.

“What?” a giggle slipped out past your lips.

“If you let me kiss you.”

You laughed, reaching up to rest one hand on the back of his neck, “For your health.”

You could feel the smile still on his face as he pressed his lips against yours. Everything else that had been happening suddenly faded from your mind—the only thing you could think about was how right it felt to be kissing him. His thumb traced lightly along your cheekbone as he leaned into you. You couldn’t win out over the urge to smile as you continued to kiss him, and you could feel the laughter starting to vibrate in his chest.

He pulled you so that you were straddling his lap, keeping his lips locked onto yours as he did. Your hands cradled the back of his head as his arms wrapped tightly around your waist. You could feel the warmth of his body seeping through your shirt and the only thought coursing through your brain was that he felt like home.

When he finally pulled his lips off of yours, they were still curved up into a smile. You could feel the warmth flooding your face as you tried to stifle a laugh, biting down lightly on your bottom lip. He ran his hands up and down your sides and you pressed a quick, light kiss to his lips.

“Feel better?” you finally said, your laughter beginning to escape you.

“I think so,” there was a playful glint in his eyes, “but just to be sure, could you do that again?”

You rolled your eyes, shaking your head despite the fact that you knew you were never going to say no to him, “Anything for you.”

#soa #sons of anarchy #juice ortiz #juice ortiz x reader #juice ortiz x you #juice ortiz imagine #juan carlos #juan carlos ortiz #sons of anarchy imagine #my writing #fanfiction #drabblesmc

[yoonia]

About Time // Part 20

➬ Character | Jungkook x reader / Jimin x reader (feat. BTS)

↳ Type/Genre/words | Angst, Fluff, Alternate Universe (Time Travel!au/Time Leap!au, Soulmate!au), Eventual Smut / 18,5k words

↳ Prompts | “What if you find your soulmate… at the wrong time?” - Lauren Kate, Passion

↳ Summary | Be careful for what you wish for, because you may never know how to deal with them once it comes true. What would you do when your wish for a second chance actually came true? But was it really a fulfilled wish? Too many questions lie when it actually happened. Were they real memories? Or perhaps a part of a past life? Was it only a dream all along? Will everything be different this time?

↳ Ratings | Mature/+18 and up

↳ Warnings | mentions of alcoholism, mentions of cancer, (probably) inaccurate medical and law terms

↳ Author’s Note | This chapter took me forever to finish, but I’m glad that it’s finally out. I want to thank my girls, @randombtsprincessa and @softyoongiionly​ who have been hyping me out and yelling at me each time I came close to giving up and when I stop writing, and as always my second set of eyes, @theodea​. I hope you’ll enjoy this one as we slowly unravel the story between our characters. Please make sure not to miss the second note at the end of the chapter. Thank you!

↳ ⤎ Previous Chapter | Series Index: About Time | Next Chapter ⇢

Song Companion | Shah - Can't Leave You | Oleg Byonic - Wait For You

—First life. St. Vincent’s Hospital, year 2027—

Subtle movements happening around me were the ones that had woken me up.

Whoever it was that had been moving around while I was still asleep, they had tried to do things stealthily, moving about carefully enough not to disturb my sleep.

But when a person had been stuck in one place for so long the way I did, their senses would easily become familiar to their surroundings the same way mine had. I didn’t need much to recognise the sounds that had been constantly happening around me, allowing me to identify the foreign ones when they appeared. I would be able to feel every movement, be it from any unanimated object or simply random movements that took place, and I could sense the changes in the air around me as it happened. So it was easy for me to catch their presence even before I had my eyes opened when they kept on moving, the low thud of their footsteps and the things they were moving around followed each move they made.

And then there were also the scents. It was his cologne that allowed me to recognise him without me seeing him. And it was a good thing too, because it allowed my heartbeat to settle down from its frantic pace and prevent me from waking up in fear, startled to find a random stranger invading my space.

I finally opened my eyes slowly. He was nothing but a blurry blob of a person moving around my room when I looked at him through my bleary eyes. The way he was still pacing back and forth around the bedside drawers told me that he had yet to realise that I was awake. So I continued watching him, blinking my eyes until the sight of him gradually grew clearer and I was finally able to see just what he was doing in my hospital room.

Of course, cleaning up my mess would be the first thing he would do the moment he got here, I wondered with a smile.

This man could never settle with a messy space. He could not even settle in patience without finding something to do, no matter how often he would complain or whine whenever he felt like he had been doing too many things at once.

I barely moved when Yoongi reached out to grab a bouquet of fresh flowers that had been left on top of the small table near the doorway. It looked new, and I had no recollection of seeing it before I fell asleep after my treatment this morning, so it must have arrived just a while ago. I saw Yoongi opening the card that came with it and tutted to himself, muttering low as he shook his head.

The moment I realised what he was saying, I could no longer stay silent. “Bastard? Did the sender really sign the card with that name?”

My voice seemed to startle Yoongi that he nearly jumped. He turned with his hand on his chest, looking almost ghastly grey that quickly faded when he chuckled. “Fucking hell, you scared me,” he said, tossing the flowers away. Though they only landed back not so gracefully on the table instead of into the trashcan placed on the floor right beside it, where he was probably aiming to throw them in before I caught him.

“Sorry,” I said, pushing myself up from the bed the best I could to sit upright while he handed me a glass of water and helped me drink. As I drank, my chest felt hollow. I had been in this place for too long that this simple gesture had become some sort of a routine. And that he had become so familiar with everything that he knew easily just what I needed. It made me feel relieved to have him with me, but I felt the guilt gnawing inside me just the same.

I hated feeling miserable and weak. And I hated it more to see the pitying look he gave me as he read me so easily. “Have you been here long?” I asked him before he ever had a chance to bring it up. Because there was no way he didn't notice it when he had grown used to my moods already. Thankfully, Yoongi had chosen not to say a thing about my condition and only shrugged.

“Not really,” he looked around, rubbing the back of his head as he followed my eyes to see the things he had been tidying up before I woke. “I wasn’t sure if it was alright to wake you up, so I tried to find some things to do while I waited. Sorry if I woke you up.”

I waved him off. “No, you didn’t. It’s just time for me to wake up. It’s almost lunchtime,” I told him, not that I was excited for lunch in any way. Not when I was not completely capable of eating properly. The blisters on my lips and inside my mouth had been increasing rapidly that I couldn’t taste anything without feeling pain. It had been coming and going, sometimes getting better after getting some vitamins or once I began drinking all those herb drinks Kara had been making for me. But whenever they came back, they always left me feeling miserable. And terribly hungry.

And hunger made me feel even more miserable.

If Yoongi had noticed the discomfort look I was making just by thinking about the food, he showed none of it. But he did scrunch his nose and gave a distasteful scoff. “You’re actually excited for the hospital food? Man, you’ve been here for too long.”

I scoffed. “Nope, I’m just excited for their pudding,” I said, without bothering to elaborate the fact that it would probably be the only thing I could manage to eat.

“Damn,” he said, shaking his head almost too dramatically. “I was hoping that I could steal your pudding while you eat.”

I knew that he was only trying to make me feel better, but that was enough to have me laughing. But only for a short while, because any kind of tension happening on my torso gave me pain. As I winced, my eyes fell on the flowers he left behind. It was not hard to recognise them. Jungkook had known me for a long time to remember just what kind of flowers I loved most, and he had gotten me the same kinds ever since we had been together.

Fresh white roses, mixed with a handful of blooming white baby’s breath—just like the ones I had in the flower bouquet that I carried on our wedding day—and with a simple white ribbon wrapped around the footstalks. He had known me well enough to know that I only enjoyed simple things, and it hurt to know that he still remembered everything to the T.

I didn’t really need to ask, but I could not help it. “Those flowers—Jungkook sent them, didn’t he?”

Yoongi clenched his jaw and nodded. “I heard that he’s making amends.”

I rolled my eyes. “No, he just promised to stay around. Be a friend,” I told him, to which he gave me a sceptical look through his eyes. “He wants to be involved but not so much to disturb my life or to get in the way of my recovery process.”

Yoongi started shaking his head. I knew that I didn’t have to explain things on Jungkook’s behalf or to defend him right in front of my friend. But what Yoongi did not know was that Jungkook was not the only one making amends. If he was willing to try and make peace with everything that had been going on, then I should do just the same. It was the only way I could do to let the pain of his betrayal go away and to be able to look at my future without any resentment of the past.

It may have been far too late for me to realise it, and I hated the fact that I needed Jimin there to open my eyes, but the only reason why I have yet to be able to move forward entirely had been due to my anger. Letting my resentment grow freely inside my chest would only blind me from the beautiful things waiting for me in the future.

That is, if there was still any hope for me out there.

“I was almost sure you’re going to forgive that son of a bitch again,” Yoongi finally said with a sigh.

“Oh, I have forgiven him.”

Yoongi sat back with a jolt. “What?”

Chuckling, I waved him off. “No, I meant to say that I have forgiven him, just so we could move on. It has been too exhausting to keep being angry. If he really meant it when he said he wanted us to be friends, that he wanted to support me, then I should stop being so hostile with him. It’s actually pretty relieving to not be angry with him all the time,” I explained, and Yoongi slowly relaxed, while I had to clench my teeth together at the memory of all those passing moments we have had where we were too busy battling each other instead of moving forward. “Not to mention, the last altercation he caused had hurt Jimin. I don’t think I would have any more to give if I’m going to continue fighting him.”

Yoongi sat in his chair with his arms crossed over his chest. Sighing, he nodded his head after a while. “I still regretted not being here at the time to punch his face. Not to defend your boyfriend, but for stressing you out.”

I gave him a wry smile. Our relationship had always been a bit more cordial before this point, when we were just two people running a freelance business together. Back in college, he was nothing more but a stranger since we both ran with different crowds. He was more a part of Jungkook’s circle than he was in mine. But to have him on my side this time around, to have him as a part of my support system both as a friend and a second brother to me was gratifying.

“You haven’t been around much. I was starting to miss you,” I told him, making him chuckle. It was not a lie, I did miss him. His absence had never felt so strong before, but even with the overwhelming change happening in my life lately, I have missed his presence around me.

“And you really want me to believe that you actually have been thinking of me?” he jokingly asked me. “I thought you already have someone to keep you company. And I know that he’s been keeping you busy.” He said this while waggling his eyebrows, and I felt my face flushing with heat. He may not have fully supported my new relationship with Jimin at first, stating that I was risking my heart by being close to someone who was fighting the same battle as I was, but he seemed pretty okay with it now.

“What have you been up to?” I asked him. “Come on, tell me anything. I’m bored, and anxious.” Because the days were moving closer to the day for my surgery, was what I couldn’t tell him. Thinking about it only made me tremble in fear, so I tried to avoid bringing it up unless it was necessary. “Tell me that the world outside still exists.”

He gave a bitter chuckle. “Oh, the world outside still exists, all right,” he said, before he began updating me about everything that had been going on lately. Not everything in the world that I could keep up on my own through the news or the things I saw on the television, however, but the things around us that I had left behind. He updated on things regarding work, since I had left behind a bunch of unfinished projects on his hands when I got sick. I had tried my best to help him while I still could, until I had no more energy and he stopped bringing files on our projects to the hospital so he could stop me from trying to force myself to stay active.

Then he suddenly fell silent, just when I was asking him about what had been going on in his life. He looked a bit embarrassed for a moment, looking everywhere but my eyes until he finally took a deep breath and spoke.

“I’m seeing someone,” Yoongi finally admitted. “It’s new and nothing really serious yet, so Hoseok told me to take my time for myself with—you know.”

“No, I totally understand. I don’t ever want to be in the way for you or Hoseok on whatever is happening with your lives,” I told him, before realising something else. “Did you think I would say something about it? Is that why you never said anything to me at first? You know I wouldn’t, right? You’ve done so much for me. I already told you and my brother that I don’t want to have you both putting lives on hold for me. I know Hoseok is starting to.”

And I meant it. I have noticed it for a while but my brother had never wanted to talk about it. Hoseok was starting to look like he was stepping back from living his life, as he struggled to be there for me the entire time I was battling my illness, all while he was doing all he could to help me get out of my broken marriage completely unscathed.

Yoongi’s smile looked a bit sad when he looked at me. “I know you wouldn’t say anything bad. You’ve always been so great when it comes to dealing with my relationships. I think you’ve handled things better than I had,” he said with a chuckle. “As for Hoseok—He’s trying to make up for lost time. You know, for all those years he had made the mistake of cutting you off.”

Shaking my head, I refused to acknowledge it. “It wasn’t completely his fault,” I said, surprising even myself for knowing how I meant it. Through all those years we have lost contact, I did blame Hoseok for pushing me away and refusing to hear what I had to say. He was the one who had shunned me when I needed him the most, but that anger was gone now. Just like how I had forgiven my ex-husband, just how I had forgiven Kara and my father, and how I was just starting to forgive myself for all the horrible things which had happened between us in the past, I had forgiven my brother.

“Yet he still blames himself,” Yoongi said to me patiently, defending my brother. “He still thinks that he deserves to be punished for his ignorance in the past, for not being there for you until it was too late. He kept telling me how hard it has been for him to forget that fact how he had turned his back on you. That you had trusted him and he had only let you down. I think he instantly regretted it when it happened but he didn’t know just how to reach out to you again.”

“Until he met you.” I gave him a wry smile, while deep inside, I was grateful for the fact that my brother had somehow met Yoongi by chance and reached out to him so he could become the bridge between the two of us. Yoongi had no obligations to do any of that, but he did. And he had made it possible for the two of us to reconcile, even if it had come a bit too late.

An orderly interrupted our talk by entering the room with my lunch. Yoongi stood up to retrieve the tray and took his time to set up my meal for me. After a while, I couldn’t help it, I just had to ask, “Why do you take such good care of me? I mean, I’m happy that you are here and to have you as a friend and a second brother. But you’ve done a lot more. Not just for me, but for Hoseok too.”

Yoongi avoided my eyes when he returned to his seat. “Because I really care about you, ______. And you also did a lot for me when I needed help and people were turning their backs on me,” he finally said. His eyes were dark, and his pain was visible when he looked up at me. “Back then, you knew my secrets and still didn’t run away,” he said, while my memory brought me back to the past, when I had met him again after a quite some time, after he had become distant to most of the people we knew back in college. None of the people around us truly knew then that his friends had left him when things were hard for him, and I had chosen to become his friend at the time because I knew what it was like to lose everyone because of all the choices we made.

“I would never turn my back on you,” I told him, while he only gave me a bitter chuckle.

“Well, most people did. They always said it didn’t matter, but then they couldn’t look at me the same way again.”

I bit my lip when I remembered those days. Those final days before I finally left college, when people were whispering things on campus. Bad rumours had always been easy to travel quickly, especially when it came to a person like Yoongi. “Did people ever find out? I thought nobody ever clarified the rumours that had been going around at campus.”

He scoffed. “No, but it happened around the same time I began cutting back from classes and partying, so I guess people took it as a confirmation to them being true. And I had no point or a reason to deny it. Especially since when the truth finally came out, it didn’t really help much to make a difference in the situation.”

I reached out to him and grabbed his hand. “It doesn’t really matter anymore, does it? It’s in the past and you have grown far from that. And you’ll have my back as long as you have me.”

Chuckling softly, Yoongi gave me a relieved smile as he gripped my hand tighter. “Good. Cause you’ll have mine as long as I can help it.”

My heart felt full and warm with the promise that we shared, but at the same time, I also felt the weight of guilt brewing inside my chest as I said those words to him. I was grateful and glad for our friendship and knowing that we would be there for each other no matter what cause, and I had meant every word I said. But I couldn’t help but wished that I had been able to do the same and keep my promise to someone else.

I still wished that I had been able to do the same to another person who I should have never turned my back on in the past.

—Present life. Year 2018—

Winter break had barely ended when I returned to campus at the beginning of the new year.

The cold breeze still felt so strong even though spring was right in the corner that I had to tighten my coat while I paced down the slippery sidewalk towards the rendezvous spot. Taehyung had to repeatedly look over his shoulder to make sure that I was still following him close behind and that I hadn’t slipped away without him noticing. It was partly my fault that he got worried. Simply because I kept refusing his help each time he tried to hold my hand as we walked down the icy sidewalk on our not so sufficient boots. But I also knew that he could barely hold his own, which had been the reason why I didn’t want to become a burden.

Not when I was supposed to be here to give him the support he needed.

I looked up to notice that we were getting close to the east side plaza, where the largest park in the campus’ vicinity was located and also where people were gathering for the event. Loud voices and excited chatters were heard just when we were coming up around the corner, while Taehyung’s gaze looked both amused and nervous when he looked over to me for the last time.

He waited for me right before we went there. This time, I reached out for his hand and held on tightly. “You okay?”

“Fine, just nerves,” he said, shrugging, acting like it was no big deal. But I knew him, both in this lifetime and in the previous one, enough to know that he was blanketing his emotions and thoughts from me. And yet, I only chose not to push him too much about it and tried to have him think of other things instead.

“Okay, now remind me again why we came all the way here? Classes won’t start until the end of the month,” I asked him, just when a series of laughter was heard from the plaza. “And why the hell did they choose to meet up out here anyway? It’s fucking cold.”

Taehyung chuckled as he watched me wrapped my arms around myself and tugged me to come and walk with him, huddling close to keep our bodies warm. “These people are volunteers who are interested to join the spring project. I heard that they wanted to gather as many volunteers as they could get before everyone gets swamped with classes and assignments,” he began talking as he guided the two of us to join the crowd.

As we came up to the plaza, the place had already been filled with students, all wrapped up in thick winter coats and sweaters, all rubbing their hands together to keep themselves warm. But everyone shared the same wide eyes and bright, excited faces as they waited for the event to start. Everyone was standing together, facing the stage at the center. I kept on watching the people around us as Taehyung led us to the middle ground, all while sharing everything there was to know about the event.

This project was held by the local social acts group formed by students from the Social Studies and Medical Faculty, with some of Taehyung’s seniors whom he had grown close to leading the group. They always held their annual community service to help children or elders in need, and Taehyung had been involved in them a few times through the past year that he had probably grown accustomed to all of this.

Most of the work that he had done had mostly involved children, since that had been his main interest for his studies. But early winter, he had joined the service to provide coals and firewoods for elders and poor families who lived in isolated areas. For the past year, Taehyung had enjoyed doing this service and charity work because it had made him happy, it had given him a purpose and new goals to achieve, while opening a way for his future career.

In a different lifetime, being involved with this cause had only served as a form of escape.

And it was what had brought him far, far away from me until the day the bridge between us finally burned for good. All driven from the hurt that I had caused him.

“What’s the goal for the spring project, then?” I asked him just when he found us an empty spot with the perfect view towards the stage. The cold didn’t feel as harsh now as we stood between these people, but Taehyung still wrapped his arm around my shoulders and held me close to keep me warm.

“That’s what we’re all here for. The group always chooses their project from the ideas that they collect from their members or other volunteers, then chooses a captain to lead according to what kind of social service or charity they are doing. They haven’t decided what they were going to be working on this spring. Looking from all of these people gathering here, I’m guessing it’s going to be a big one. They’ve never had this many people being interested to join.”

“Maybe this is for the project that you wanted to sign up so badly before? The one they said they were going to send volunteers to the southern hemisphere?” I asked him, reminded of his wish to join the volunteer work that may give him a chance to travel to places while continuing his study.

Taehyung shook his head. “I don’t know. It could be. They haven’t really announced anything for that one either.”

I was about to say something, asking him more about this group and the organisation behind its cause, when a few people stepped up to the stage. One of the female leaders took the microphone and began to greet everyone who was present, applauding people who had come even in the cold. But I barely paid any attention to a word she said when I followed Taehyung’s gaze and saw him standing there with the other members of the volunteer group.

“There he is. Namjoon is always there with them. He’s been made captain on the last few projects that we’ve worked on,” he said, sounding almost distractedly as he watched Namjoon conversing with his friends on stage. I had to admit, the man really was attractive. His whole presence oozed confidence and his demeanour showed me that he was a smart man. Smart enough to be extremely persuasive. A dimple showed on his face when he smiled, and his laughter echoed through the stage, almost rivalling the MC’s voice as she continued to speak.

“Has he approached you yet?” I asked.

Taehyung shrugged. “He’s been a bit friendly, but that’s about it.”

“Is that why I’m here? To make sure that you would have someone to remind you to consider things before signing up?” I turn to look at him, waggling my brow to tease him a little.

This time, Taehyung turned to me and snickered. “Well, you know what they said. The only way for someone to avoid getting swayed by a handsome looking guy who happens to be an extremely persuasive man is to have your childhood crush standing right with you.”

“Whatever you say,” I said, chuckling as he tightened his arm around my shoulders and pulled me close. Neither of us said a thing as we listened to the MC spoke, before she finally handed the microphone to Namjoon, who became the one to talk about the project and let the volunteers learn more about the system, the plans, and how to sign up.

We shared nothing more but a bittersweet feeling while we were entranced as we listened to Namjoon speak, holding each other the way we never could in another life we shared.

We didn’t only come here to admire this man or to only see what today was all about, but to simply find answers. To slowly connect the dots and put the puzzle pieces together to fill the blanks, just so we could lay down every part of that other lifetime for us to understand where did everything went wrong.

There had been parts of the past, faces and names of the people that had become a part of my previous life that I could not recall or draw from my jumbled memory so easily. I may have seen or felt their presence in those memories, but some of them had appeared in my dreams merely as blurry shadows, faceless figures, people whose voice only came to me as if they had been submerged underwater.

Kim Namjoon was one of the missing pieces of the puzzle that had caused a rift in my friendship with Taehyung in another lifetime. In my memory, he was nothing but a nameless shadow, one that I feared and hated almost as much as the painful parts I shared with Jungkook from the past life. It took Taehyung finding him to help me remember everything—who he was, what he had done, and everything that happened then—all the broken memories had been unravelled the day Taehyung had first introduced me to this man sometime last semester.

And the reminder of who he was had come in the right time, because he had already become a part of Taehyung’s life through these activities he had been involved in. Because just like how it happened in the past life, Kim Namjoon was the one who had convinced Taehyung to join their movement.

The only difference now was that Taehyung had me by his side. That Taehyung had not been wounded when they first met.

In the past life, Kim Namjoon had come into Taehyung’s life when Taehyung needed someone to look up to, when Taehyung needed a friend and guidance while I kept on pushing him away, leaving him in the blind and completely alone. In that part of our lives, the man had come in at the right time, right when my best friend was completely vulnerable. And he had eased his way in so easily, filling the void in Taehyung’s life, saying all the right words and showing all the right things to have Taehyung follow him wherever he would go. What had started as a good cause to give Taehyung a purpose in life, it had ended leading him to get involved with the bad crowd, to join the bad business that Namjoon was secretly building behind his gentle smile and manipulative ways of making people around him feel special.

Taehyung had loved him with his wounded heart, and he had given the man everything. Only to have Namjoon suck his heart and soul dry, before tossing him away once he was done with him.

And I was not there to catch him when he fell.

“So what do you think? Are you going to join this one?”

The gathering event had ended two hours ago, and now we were heading towards the coffee shop where I had been working part-time for the past few months. Taehyung had insisted to walk me there despite his dorm being located in the opposite direction, saying that he was worried that I would slip if I had gone alone. After all the trouble we had by walking through the icy road and the slippery sidewalks this morning, I had no reason to argue. And I also knew that he only wanted to spend some more time with me before he had to leave for his part-time job, so I just let him be.

Ever since we watched Namjoon’s speech, Taehyung had been left in a daze. He had always reacted this way whenever he saw Namjoon. I was never quite sure whether it was due to my warnings regarding the man or if he had truly developed some sort of a crush or perhaps grown the same hero worship that he had for the man the same way he did in the different lifetime.

“I’m not sure yet,” he finally said. “Even if the cause is going to be just around the city, I don’t think I can make it if they’re starting around the same time my classes are starting over.”

His reasoning had made complete sense. But deep down, I also knew that he was lying. He was conflicted. I could feel it. And he was trying so much to hold back from whatever it was that had been bothering him.

Once Namjoon was done with his speech and the event presentation on stage, he had come down to approach Taehyung while the other students had started lining up to join the cause. He had pulled us both to the side, persuading us personally.

“It wouldn’t be as tiring as the one we did last time. We’re only visiting some of the schools at the neighbouring towns. We’re going to give classes, lend some care for the kids, do some health check-up, while the group from the Engineering Faculty will be there to help with technicalities, like building new facilities or fix old structures that didn’t survive the winter,” Namjoon had told the both of us, pretty much summarising his own presentation on stage to make sure that he would point out all the compelling factors to appeal Taehyung. “You’ve always enjoyed working on any causes that involve children, so I’m sure this would be perfect for you. Not to mention, we’ll be getting extra credits for each movement we make this semester with the faculty supporting us through funds and getting us sponsors.”

I could tell that he was getting through to Taehyung when I saw my best friend watching him with wide eyes. But I had been focusing more on Namjoon, letting my own curiosity and wonder get to me. And for someone who appeared so open, so enticing, and one whose main job was to approach people, Kim Namjoon was hard to read.

My memories of him had been nothing but scraps. It had seemed that in my other life, I had no opportunity to know him in person as he was merely a part of Taehyung’s world once our friendship fell apart and we became worlds apart. This time, I had more opportunities to know this man in person. Still, the only things I had come to know about him had only come from Taehyung.

The only thing I knew about him was that he was a year senior from us, focusing on Medical Studies to become a neurosurgeon. He was a brilliant student, had always come with the highest grade in his year, and he had been active in great causes to help people.

None of that information had ever told us the reason why everything fell apart for Taehyung when they began doing all of their causes together. We only knew that in the past life, Taehyung had gone away with him to a place far away, never to return until everything had been much too late. We just never knew when and how, and I knew that this was the reason why Taehyung had been so afraid to take the risk.

“Remember what you said to me back then, before I met Jimin? Back when I was too scared to even go out and have fun?” I asked him as we continued to walk in silence. The coffee shop had appeared on sight, so I knew that this would be the only chance I could ever be able to say this.

“No, I don’t. What did I say?”

I turned to him. “You told me to be cautious, but not too cautious that I don’t get to live and enjoy the present,” I said. “I know you’re worried about the risk of getting close to him without knowing what exactly happened to you in the past after you got together with him, but I know that you enjoy doing these things. So just go for it. If you do it, I’ll be there to join you so you won’t have to be there alone.”

Taehyung smiled at me as he listened to my promises. I could tell that he was relieved to hear it. “You would?”

“Didn’t I promise that I would never let anything come between us? Not this time,” I told him, reminding him all the promises that I had made back then when we found out that one of the many reasons why our lives had fallen apart was because neither of us was there for the other.

I had made a promise that I would never let that happen again. That I would never let him stray away from my life. No matter what. In a different life, I may have left him to fend for himself. This life had to be different. This time, we had each other.

“Right, okay,” he said, nodding to himself while sighing deeply. The frown that he had carried with him ever since we left the campus’ plaza disappeared when he looked at me. In its place came a smile, and a pair of eyes so bright it made me believe that he would be able to conquer everything if he wanted to.

“Thanks for coming with me this morning,” he said, giving me a side hug as we continued our walk.

“You know I don’t mind it. We haven’t been spending too much time together lately,” I told him as I leaned to him.

For the past few months, both of us had been busy focusing on our own lives. While my relationship with Jimin was blossoming, Taehyung was busy tackling different challenges in his life. We haven’t been spending a lot of time with each other the way we used to aside from the time we spent when we went back to our hometown together during the holidays, yet another reason why I had wanted to do this with him.

Despite our busy lives, things had been completely different still.

At least this time, he was still there, and he had yet to disappear from my life. Even if we couldn’t see each other, all we needed to do was to pick up the phone and we would be there for each other even through the distance.

“We’re still on for tonight, right?” he asked me just as we arrived at the coffee shop.

“Absolutely. Are you picking me up here once my shift ends?”

“Yeah. I might stop by at the library to drop some books, but I’ll come to get you right after,” he said, before giving me a hug as he said goodbye.

“Alright then. See you later.”

I stood in front of the coffee shop for a while longer, watching him walk away until he disappeared right around the corner on his way to the daycare center he had been working at. The coffee shop wasn’t too crowded when I walked in, with the majority of the students had yet to return on campus after the long winter break.

But that soon changed the moment my shift began, right when the rush of the lunch hour started. Students and workers from the nearby offices came in, forming a long line only minutes after I had taken over the cashier. The rush lasted for a little over an hour, much shorter than the regular hustle that would no doubt begin the moment the next term started at the end of the month.

Even if I had been out and active since early morning, I served the patrons with a smile on my face. Before I knew it, the line of customer started to dwindle. By the time I served the last patron, my back was sore and my legs were tight, but something was telling me that I wasn’t supposed to take a break yet. So I stayed behind the counter while my co-worker for the day—the only one there since many of the other staff had yet to return from their holiday—turned to ask if he could take a quick break while there was no customer coming in.

“I’m going to take a quick smoke break, is that okay? We can switch once I’m back,” he said, already in the middle of untying his apron to avoid getting some smoke on it.

“Sure, no problem. I got it handled.”

I turned back to check on my phone once he was gone, taking my time to reply to some messages that I got from Jimin who was asking about my day and my plans for the night. I had just pressed the send button when the bell at the front door chimed behind me, but it took me a few seconds too long to put my phone away before a deep voice called out.

“Excuse me. Can I make an order?”

I turned around to greet the new customer. But the moment I saw him, my body went frozen stiff and my head began to spin.

I had never met this person before. And yet, I remembered him.

Each time I tried to reclaim my memories, there was a void where someone was supposed to be a part of. There was a presence that was constant in almost every part of my painful memories. Yet aside from everyone that I had remembered so far, this person had always been nothing but a shadow, a faceless entity that was there, but never completely solid.

But the moment I saw him standing there, right on the other side of the counter, waiting for me to take his orders, his face brought all the missing pieces together. All the blurry images I had been seeing in my dreams came to me in flashing moments, so quick, so random, but far more clearly than how they all had been. His face filled all of those empty voids. His face, his eyes, his small smile, they replaced the faceless man who had been there by my side through all of the hurt, through all of my journeys.

In those dreams, in those flashing memories that I had been getting, I could never see the face of the man who was holding my hand while I was fighting for my life. And at that moment, as I was looking straight into this customer’s eyes, his face was all I see being there by my side.

He was there.

He was always there.

“Um—hello?”

The man waved his hand right in front of my face with an amused look, snapping me right out of my stupor.

“Oh, uh—yes, hi. Sorry, what can I get you?” I questioned him, unable to hold back the nervous chuckle that came bubbling out. Thankfully, he only smiled.

“I���ll have a cup of espresso and a bagel,” he said, only after taking a moment perusing through the menu placed above the counter.

My fingers were shaking when I was placing his orders into the cashier machine, so I kept my eyes down to make sure I wasn’t making a mistake. “Right. To go?”

He hummed softly and looked around. “Um—no, I think I’ll take them here.”

“Okay,” I said, taking a moment to finish up his orders. “Thank you. You can take a seat or wait on the counter. We’ll call your name once your order is ready.”

“Yeah, okay. My name is—”

“Yoongi,” I blurted out before he could even finish. For some reason, just like how his face filled all the missing puzzle, his name just came into my head as if I had known him my whole life.

When I saw his eyebrows came up to his forehead, I knew then that he was just as surprised as I was. “What? Have we met?”

“Um, well—” I began to stutter while my brain seemed to just stop working indefinitely. So I only said the first thing I could think of as an excuse, “You’re pretty well known. I mean, my friends know you. I just suddenly remember your name.”

Well, at least that was not a complete lie. I was pretty sure that perhaps some of my friends would know him, and I did just remember his name.

He looked at me with a frown, not looking entirely convinced, but he said nothing of it when he handed me his cash to pay for his orders. “Right, well. That’s me. I’m Yoongi.”

“Of course,” I said, avoiding his gaze as I put his money in. “I’ll call you when your coffee is ready.”

His eyes lingered on me for a few seconds, filled with curiosity and probably a bunch of other questions, but he only nodded. “Thanks,” he said to me as he walked to the other side of the counter, leaving me feeling lightheaded.

Everything seemed to be colliding together right at the same time. The final missing pieces of the puzzle were coming to place one at a time. As if the whole universe was trying to shove everything to my face, though I really had no idea just what it was trying to tell me.

—Present life. Hot and Spicy Grill. Year 2018—

As promised, Taehyung had picked me up at work right the moment my shift was up.

There was nothing much to say between us as we drove away in his small city car from the coffee shop, since I was still trying to process the shock of having the unexpected meeting during work earlier while Taehyung seemed like he was having his own turmoil to deal with. He was silent during the drive, looking distracted but thankfully not enough to derail him from driving the car properly. But his silence had made it hard for me to question it when he suddenly started leading the car away from the campus grounds and he kept going further until the car entered the freeway.

It took a few turns before the sight around me changed, the suburbs getting further away behind us, when I finally grew wary and curious that I simply had to speak up. “Are you sure we’re still going to dinner? You’re not planning on kidnapping me, are you?”

Taehyung’s eyes grew wide before he chuckled. “Sorry, it’s a surprise,” he said. “Don’t worry, I won’t go crazy and take you to any place with no civilisation like what Jimin did.”

Smiling, I looked away from him when my face began to flush. I had told him once about the surprise trip that Jimin had taken me to—which I had to spill because I had completely forgotten to call him back that night after we had just parted way minutes before Jimin came to pick me up. I had told him about how Jimin planned out an outdoor picnic with a thousand stars above us and the view of the valley everywhere I looked, though I had to skip telling him about the ‘dessert’ Jimin gave me under the same stars which had sent me flying to heavenly bliss.

Judging from the sly smirk he was making now, I supposed he had made his own guess to what had happened on the date once the food was left forgotten.

As I looked out the window, I finally realised that he was right. He was not taking me towards the same area that Jimin had taken me to. On the outer lane of the freeway, I saw buildings and dense trees instead of hills and valleys. And to my relief, what I was seeing was the kind of trees I would normally see packed up in the city. The lanes were getting more and more packed with cars as we went further, so I wasn’t quite surprised to see him turning to the exit heading downtown.

“Sorry for the long trip,” he said. “I just found out about this place a while ago and wanted to check it out. I figured if I want to take anyone here to try it then it should be you since we haven’t done this for a while.”

“Aww—that’s so nice that you’re thinking of me. You are truly the best friend every girl needs. The man after my own heart. Or, in this case, stomach,” I teased him, earning his laugh.

It didn’t take much longer than fifteen minutes after we were out of the freeway before he pulled into a small spaced parking lot, and my gaze fell on the small restaurant that seemed like it had only opened pretty recently. “Is it a barbecue and grill place? Awesome!”

“Figured you’ll love it,” he said, turning the car engine off. “Let’s go before the place gets packed with the dinner crowd.”

It didn’t take us long to be seated. But Taehyung was right. Not too long after we made our orders, more and more people started coming in and the place was full within minutes.

“I hope this place is good. People keep talking about this place so I bet these people came from everywhere around the city. I don’t even doubt that we would see some familiar faces from campus,” Taehyung told me after taking a quick look around.

“I’m really hungry I can eat anything at this point,” I said, smiling at him. It really didn’t matter where we were or if the trip here had been worth it. It was spending the time with my best friend during all of the things that had been going on in our lives which I had been most excited about.

The tables around us had started grilling and Taehyung seemed giddy in his seat, looking excited as he looked at the meal with a deep longing in his eyes and he licked his lips at the roasted beef cooking beside us. This was something that I had missed, enjoying our time together and to see him loosening up. Each time we were together, I would look at him and wonder how we ever came apart.

How much different was it back then between us compared to us now? Would we still have this if I had never learned all the mistakes we made in the past life?

Taehyung was picking on the welcome snacks when I felt my phone vibrating in my bag. Remembering that I had promised Jimin to text him the moment Taehyung had succeeded in picking me up at work while he couldn’t, I pulled out the phone and smiled when I noticed that he had messaged me first.

From Jimin: Hey, babe. Are you out with Taehyung?

From Jimin: I’m taking a break atm and I thought about you. Hope he didn’t decide to steal you away from me :(

A smile came to my face as I was reading through his messages. I could picture him sitting down in the middle of his dance practice, all sweaty and breathless while he was typing these words. My heart jumped and it made me realise how much I missed him, even if we had only been apart for a day thanks to our schedules.

To Jimin: I’m safe. He’s not kidnapping me or whatever, but you did give him an idea of taking me far away from campus

From Jimin: Sorry, my bad :p

To Jimin: How’s practice?

From Jimin: These guys are relentless. I’ll probably wake up all sore and bruised tomorrow

To Jimin: But you love it

From Jimin: I do :)

To Jimin: What time will you be done?

From Jimin: We’re doing one more round of practice then I’ll be on my way home

Home. The way he had said it made my heart stir. Ever since we became official, Jimin had repeatedly asked me to move in with him. But I have yet to give an answer, thinking that perhaps things had been going on too fast. If there was anything that I learned from putting all the pieces from my other life together was that moving too fast could lead to a disaster.

Would I dare risk it and say yes? I knew that it was something that my previous self—the other ’me’—had wished for. I saw her dreams as some broken fragments of memories in my dreams, had even mistaken them as actual memories until I managed to decipher them as parts of imaginations instead, and many of those images had shown me various types of white picket fence houses. The settings and everything else around them would be a blurry mess and they had kept changing each time they came to me, but there had always been one part of it that had been consistent, an invariable factor from all of these dreams—Jimin.

“Is that Jimin?” Taehyung questioned me the moment he noticed the expressions I was making as I was messaging my boyfriend back, not realising that my mind had started to wander. “Is he still at practice?”

Putting away my phone, I smiled at him. “Yeah. That’s him. He was checking on me. Kinda. I told him that I’d be with you while he’s busy with his dance.”

Taehyung tilted his head. “Doesn’t he bring you to his practices?”

“No,” I said, snickering to myself when I remembered how adamant Jimin had been to stop me when I insisted to come to his practice. “Jimin said it’s better for me to just watch the actual performance. I think he’s still a bit embarrassed to show me all the process behind his work.”

Taehyung chuckled. Shaking his head, he only commented lightly, “He probably didn’t want you distracting him. Or worse, have his friends coming on to you while he’s busy dancing.”

I rolled my eyes at him. Both of us knew that Jimin had a bit of a jealousy streak, but not so much that it made me feel suffocated just to be with him, or to feel like I was constantly walking on eggshells. The only way he had been showing it was to playfully complain or he would sometimes poke fun on me, acting sulky but never too much.

There was only one person in this world who could tick him off the wrong way. And honestly, Jimin was not the only one who was against this same person.

Looking up at Taehyung, I realised that he had never been kind to each time Jungkook’s name was mentioned. Out of everyone in my life, he was the only person who knew why I had to stay away from Jungkook. He was the only one who had heard all the stories, everything that I remembered from the other ’me’ and all that I felt when the memories returned.

Just like how I was the only person who knew what would happen to both of us if we would ever make another mistake.

Taehyung glanced towards the table next to us one last time, growing impatient while he was completely oblivious to where my mind had been wandering to. Watching him like this reminded me of how distracted he had been when he first came to pick me up, suggesting that something must have happened to him between the moment when we parted ways to the time he came by at the coffee shop. I had been waiting for him to talk about it, only to have him constantly acting as if I had yet to notice his odd behaviour.

“So how was your day?” I finally asked him when his gaze turned blank and he was suddenly becoming more interested in the paper napkin which he had placed on his lap. “You haven’t told me much about your work and your trip to the library.”

He shrugged. “It’s fine.”

That got me raising my brows. It was becoming more obvious to me now that he was trying to avoid talking about it. “Really?”

Taehyung looked up to me, pressing his lips before he released a defeated sigh. “I hate you,” he said, catching me off guard before he suddenly chuckled. “I hate that I can never lie to you.”

Smiling to him, I merely shrugged my shoulders the way he often did. “We’ve been friends since forever. If there’s one person in this world who knows you better than yourself, it would be me,” I said teasingly, before I added, “Second to Hoseok. Sometimes I wonder if he’s secretly your brother, not mine.”

Taehyung chuckled at that. There was no lie that he had come to grow close to Hoseok as we grew up together. Our friendship had started from a play date held by our Moms that happened when we were kids, only because our houses were located in the same block and I was the only one in the neighbourhood who was at the same age as he was. Then our friendship grew in elementary school when we promised to have each other’s backs, and we stayed close as we kept on going to the same school, doing the same things together growing up, then he stayed with me when I got sick and while I was recovering in the hospital years ago. But, as a boy, he had looked up to Hoseok as if he was his own older brother, and Hoseok had taken a liking to him especially because he had always wanted a brother.

“True. Though he wouldn’t be subtle if he wants to know stuff about me. He’d probably be snapping at me—Come on! Spill!” Taehyung jokingly imitated Hoseok’s tone of voice, which made me laugh when I saw his face and I could actually imagine my brother’s voice coming out of him.

“Seriously, though. What is it?” I asked again before he ever had a chance to change the topic around and avoid answering your question. “You came to the coffee shop looking like someone had just hurt your dog. And you’ve been pretty quiet when you’re not talking about this place and the food.”

Once again, he pressed his lips together. “Nothing much, really,” he started, though he suddenly grew restless in his seat and he began to look away, finding it hard to look into my eyes. He suddenly seemed nervous, yet I still felt a hint of relief when I didn’t see any guilt in his eyes, it would probably be worse if he was hiding something big from me.

“It’s just—” he said, clearing his throat. “I stumbled upon Namjoon at the library earlier.”

“You did?”

Are you sure that he was not stalking you? —Was what I had originally wanted to say, but I kept them to myself.

Taehyung looked down briefly before facing me again. “Right, so—he kept on asking me to join the cause and the rest of their spring activities cause they needed more people. Then he started asking me about my classes, the professors I’ve gotten this semester, before he suddenly asked if we could grab a coffee sometime.”

I blinked. He had spoken so quickly during the last part of his sentence that I wasn’t sure if I was hearing things right until it finally clicked for me a few milliseconds too long. “He asked you to go out for coffee?” I asked, to which he nodded. “Like—casually? Or—”

“Like—he just literally said, ‘Hey, why don’t we grab some coffee sometime and talk more?’, in a friendly kind of way,” he said, imitating Namjoon’s voice in his own way.

“What did you say to him?”

“Nothing,” he said, shrugging sheepishly. “I was kind of shocked and he only patted me in the back and walked away.”

I blinked again. “Funny how he seems to insist having you around a lot,” I muttered, before looking at him suspiciously. “He even came to you this morning while the gathering was clearing up. And you said he wasn’t interested to make a move on you.”

The waiter came in just then to drop our drinks and Taehyung took his time to take a sip of his cold beer before answering, “I don’t know either. He didn’t seem like he even noticed me that much in the past year.”

“How did you feel about his offer then?”

He raised his brows. “How I felt? Well—I certainly didn’t have all the goosebumps, the fireworks, or my heart beating fast cause I have no jumbled memories mixing in between the good and the bad, so—”

“Hey, watch it—” I warned him while pointing a straw at him. “No, I’m just asking cause it seemed to bother you a little.”

“It’s not. It’s just—” he seemed to contemplate his answers for a moment, like he was trying to find the best way to explain his trail of thoughts even while he was having trouble understanding it himself.

“I guess I was just wondering, why me?” he finally said. “I mean, I kind of understand why he would be approaching me—another ’me’—in the alter life. It must have been compelling to come on to someone who seemed broken and lost and I had probably seen him as my saviour, the light of my life after the darkness, the white knight.”

His overly dramatic expression had you raising your brows. “He’s kind of a heartthrob too.”

“Yeah—” he hummed. “I won’t even deny the fact that he’s attractive. But normal me? This me? I wouldn’t have picked him as the type of guy I’d be dating if I would—” he stopped and started glancing around, as if he was afraid that someone might be listening in. “You know.”

And I did know what he was trying to tell me. For someone who had been open about his sexual preferences, he was still wary about the world around us, not too sure on how they would perceive him.

He leaned back on his seat when he added, “He seems so put together too. But after knowing what would have happened if I had just let things be, I can somehow look past his false act of composure and find him seem a bit unhinged.”

“Seriously?” I questioned him, laughing. “Unhinged? Have you been reading criminal fiction novels in your Psych classes?”

He rolled his eyes. “You know what I mean.”

I laughed at him, but then stopped myself as I watched him closely. While a part of me was relieved that he believed me enough to tread things carefully, I was also feeling the guilt for allowing him to build his own boundaries by giving him all the warnings on what was supposed to be our future. Even though he was giving it the best he could, I still worried that he might not be living his life to the fullest potential just because he was afraid to make any decision that could lead to the end of our friendship.

Taehyung looked at me when I fell silent. “What? Why aren’t you saying anything?”

Sighing, I had no choice but to share my thoughts on this. “Just wondering if I’ve made the right decision on letting you know about your supposed future. What if my memories had been wrong this whole time and it wasn’t Namjoon that I saw? What if he’s just a good guy with his mind on his good cause who happens to have an innocent crush on my best friend?”

Taehyung seemed to ponder on it briefly before shaking his head. “I’ve been talking shit and making long speeches about you risking things by not staying away from this dude who had supposedly ruined your life and your trust to other human beings—”

I rolled my eyes. “His name is Jungkook.”

But he continued on, ignoring me completely. “—so I’ve decided not to risk mine. Second chances, remember?”

His words made me stop. I bit my lip and nodded. “Second chances.”

Taehyung gave me a grim smile when he nodded back, but it also appeared to me that there was a huge weight being pulled away from his shoulders. As if being honest with each other had been freeing for him, something that I was feeling too.

Noticing that our meal order had yet to arrive at our table, Taehyung looked around and pushed himself out of his seat. “The food’s going to be here any minute but I’m going to need the restrooms. I’ll be right back,” he said, before he left his seat to make a quick run to the restrooms at the back.

I watched him leave just in time for my phone to vibrate in my hand. I looked down, opening the messaging app immediately for thinking that Jimin had texted some more before his practice would start again, only to stop when I saw Jungkook’s name flashing on the screen instead.

From Jungkook: Hey, I hope I’m not texting you with your boyfriend around :p

From Jungkook: It’s been a while since I’ve seen you at the pub

From Jungkook: Is everything okay?

Biting my lips, I looked over to where I saw Taehyung had disappeared to and breathed a sigh of relief that the message had come in while he was gone. Taehyung would have only needed to take one look at my face before he would start asking questions, including why I had been texting with Jungkook from time to time.

To Jungkook: everything’s fine

To Jungkook: Been a bit busy, that’s all. How are you?

From Jungkook: doing okay

From Jungkook: I’m finally back on campus and I just got my schedules at the pub. Will be performing on stage next Friday night

From Jungkook: Will you come?

I lowered the phone to my lap, having no idea how to respond. While most of our texts had been about keeping up with each other’s lives, there had been a few times when he would invite me to his show at the pub. I had only come to watch him a couple of times, most of them without even saying hello to him directly and leaving before giving him a chance to sit with me. I knew it was wrong to keep in touch and talk to him like this after what I had promised my best friend before, but it had not been easy for me to ignore him.

And he was not someone who would give up so easily either that ignoring his text messages was never a choice. Not when he would often try to find me or even call me until he could talk to me.

From Jungkook: ________?

Another message came in, letting me know that he was waiting for my response. Biting my lip, I pondered over the options. What was I supposed to say? And would he be happy to hear what my answers if I had refused to come?

And why on earth was I already wondering what clothes to wear for the night at the pub?

To Jungkook: Sorry

To Jungkook: I’ll try to be there. What time?

From Jungkook: the second stage of the night. 8 PM

From Jungkook: I’ll be waiting :)

Reading through his response, my stomach turned and my chest grew tight with guilt. There was no way out of this now. And I really had no idea what I was doing either, knowing that Friday night would be the night I would usually come to stay at Jimin’s place so we could spend the weekend together.

“Fuck,” I cursed at myself, before tossing my phone into my bag to avoid looking through his messages again.

The meal we ordered had just arrived at the table when Taehyung returned, with the waiter apologising to the two of us repeatedly about the long wait, explaining to us overwhelmed they were as the restaurant was a full house for the night. As Taehyung returned to his seat, the waiter walked away from our table, and my eyes were drawn to follow him as he weaved through the floor between the tables to return to the kitchen area.

That was when I saw him. His head bobbing over the other seated guests as he walked across the room until he found the table that seemed to have been reserved for him.

“What?” Taehyung questioned me when he noticed, his voice drawing my attention when I was still looking far away. “What is it?” he asked again when he got no answer, then he began looking around the seating area to find what I was looking at.

“I saw someone. From campus. Though it seems a bit odd that he had come all the way to this place to eat,” I said, disregarding the fact that it had been the same case for us since Taehyung and I had driven far to be there too. “There, he’s on the table at the corner. Wearing a black shirt and a black cap.”

He followed the direction I was subtly pointing to, taking a few seconds before his eyes grew with recognition when he finally found Yoongi at the other side of the restaurant.

“You know him?” he asked, raising his brows at me when he turned to me again. “I thought the only people you know on campus are just me, Jimin, and his cousin.”

“Ha, ha, funny,” I sneered at him while rolling my eyes while he enjoyed having been able to mock me about it. But then my eyes went back to his table, seeing Yoongi with another man who looked like him, but a bit older.

“He came to the coffee shop earlier today on my shift,” I told him, finding him looking at Yoongi again as if he wanted to make sure. “You know who he is?”

He turned back to you with wide eyes. “Min Yoongi? Everyone knows him. He’s pretty popular among the frat boys. He’s always leading his friends on the stuff they always organise in their frat houses, though he hasn’t really been in the scene that much lately.”

“And you have?”

He scoffed at me. “Hey, unlike you, I still have a reputation to uphold,” he teased me, snickering when I gave him a scowl. “My dorm mate gets invited to their parties a lot and I always go with him when I can.”

I looked over to Yoongi again, noticing the broody look that he was wearing even as he was chatting with his companion. His brother, more likely, since they looked pretty similar from this distance. Except that when Yoongi was wearing a dark shirt, his brother was wearing something lighter and a bit too formal for a grill house. “So, why hasn’t he been around?”

“Seems like he’s graduating this year, and rumours said he had already taken a job at his brother’s company so he no longer spends much time on campus unless necessary,” he explained slowly before he began glancing around warily the way he did previously. “But, um—there’s also this rumour going around.”

I snapped my head to look at him. “What kind of rumour?”

Taehyung took another quick glance at Yoongi before leaning closer so he could whisper, “Someone said they caught him kissing a TA. A male TA. It happened at a dorm party.”

My eyes grew instantly wide and I had to lean closer as I whispered angrily, “And people just—what? Stay away from him?”

Taehyung shrugged. “I’m not sure, but it seems like his friends are beginning to dwindle. I don’t think it’s because they’re afraid of the repercussions from sticking around or if it’s because there’s a possibility that he’s queer if the rumours are true, it’s just—” he swallowed hard, looking sympathetic as he glanced one more time towards Yoongi’s table before looking at me again, and I knew that the look he was giving me was there only due to the fact that he had once been in his shoes. “He’s been hiding this for so long, if it’s really true. Maybe they’re just pissed cause he’s been keeping a secret. You know how those frat boys are, they hold secrets like a treasure.”

They sure did.

Because according to one of my strongest memories of all, one of the biggest secrets that had been painful enough for me to remember from my past life was how Jungkook’s friends had also had a hand in hiding his sins from me.

Shaking my head, I chose to look away from Yoongi. “Still seems so stupid to just turn their backs on him like that just because of some rumours,” I wondered out loud, when the bitter truth of how he was left abandoned by the same people who were supposed to support him through it truly sunk in.

“It makes you think. Doesn’t it?” he asked me, though it sounded more like he was wondering out loud just like I was.

“About what?” I asked him.

“How you can’t always depend on others to stay in your life forever,” he said to me with an as-matter-factly tone, though it also sounded bitter, because he had experienced it too. Meeting his eyes, I was suddenly glad that I had been able to show him that he deserved the kind of support he needed too.

As we continued with our dinner, talking about all the silly and mundane things from our daily lives, I couldn’t shake the nagging thought still hanging in the back of my head. Too many coincidences happening on the same day. Right at that moment, just when I recounted that I had met Yoongi coincidentally twice in the same day after not being able to remember him for so long, something in my head clicked.

I just didn’t know what to do about it. And I had no idea how I could make it all possible to even happen.

—First life. St. Vincent’s Hospital, year 2027—

As the final weeks before the surgery slowly started creeping up on me, I was slowly becoming a complete nervous wreck.

The fact that I was having an on and off fever also did not help my case at all. I was feeling like crap, was constantly exhausted, without knowing if the reason I kept on falling asleep was due to the overwhelming dose of painkillers that still remained in my blood or if my body had succumbed to the lingering pain that had only been intensifying, as if the masses in my body knew that they were about to be torn to pieces and they were giving their last fight.

My family, which mainly included Hoseok and Kara with the additional help from Yoongi, had been coming and going to stay with me and nurse me whenever needed. I knew that they were trying to ease my mind by staying positive whenever they were around, lifting my spirit while distracting me with things that they knew would make me happy. They would do everything they could, from bringing me movies, books, sometimes food or snacks that I could take without breaking the doctors’ rules and ones that I could swallow easily, to telling me stories or life updates that would be able to stop me from thinking about all the negative things I was facing.

But as the days were coming closer to the day of the surgery, not a single thing could help ease my mind. It was then when I finally realised that the fear had never truly sunk in, and it was only then that my brain was finally processing the fact that I was about to face a high-risk procedure that—according to some of the things I had been reading while I was preparing for it—also had a high chance of failure. And every illusion that I had let itself grow inside my mind, the false hope and optimism shattered like a glass wall and I was faced with the reality that perhaps all of what I was about to go through would be nothing but a fruitless attempt of getting me out of my bind.

It was even worse because I also knew that the people around me were doing all they could to hide the fact that Jimin had been absent.

The emptiness I felt without him there had seemed like a void, a black hole that was growing larger inside me, as if it would be strong enough to swallow me from within. That was when I realised how much I needed him, and I could never imagine how life would be if I no longer had him by my side.

The last time I came to see him, he had been recovering from a long day of tests and treatments, and I had stayed in his room until he was feeling better, only after I had made sure that he was strong enough to go through the days without constantly being under watch.

Not too long after we parted ways, I was getting prepared for the surgery that I was no longer allowed to leave the room or to roam the hospital as freely as I had before. Though the reason why I had not been able to come and see him was not only due to the restrictions given to me, but also because my body had simply given up. I had no energy, and the pain was getting too unbearable as I was getting less painkillers to allow my body to take in more of my new meds.

The last time I saw him again was when I was under heavy medication. I was having a high fever that day and I heard his voice talking to my brother and the residing nurse to ask about my condition. I felt him holding my hand and kissing my forehead each time I woke up, barely able to speak, but seeing his face through my bleary eyes felt like a breath of fresh air. When I woke up feeling much better later that night, he was no longer there, but his warmth remained.

The only thing that had been making me worried was knowing that there had to be a reason why he had yet to come and visit me ever since. In other—more regular—days, he would appear in my room to each time I was unable to visit. He had also promised to stay by my side through this surgery, and yet, only a couple of days left and there was still no sign of him, letting me wondering if there was something wrong.

“I can check on him if you want,” Yoongi finally offered after noticing how anxious I had been the whole day. He must have caught me glancing towards the door even as we were sitting there, watching the movie playing from his laptop together. Perhaps he knew that my head had never been on the movie, just like it had always been.

I looked at him and sighed. “Could you?” I finally relented and asked him. “I asked Soyeon about him but she didn’t say much except that Jimin is still recovering. We text at night before bed, but he’d never answer when I ask how he’s doing.”

Yoongi simply nodded. “You know, it’d probably be easier if you guys just share a room together, huh?” he wryly said.

“I wish,” I chuckled, rolling my eyes before I realised just how tempting the idea had sounded. “Is something like that even possible though?”

Yoongi shrugged. “I’ve heard of family members or spouses with terminal illnesses being put together in the same room, but I don’t know if it’s possible on your case. I could have Hoseok or Kara to ask around. They’re the ones who are listed as your family.”

Shaking my head, I turned to look at the laptop again. “I don’t even know if Jimin would agree.”

“I’m sure he’s just as devastated as you are that he can’t come to see you.”

“You really think so?” I questioned him, finding him frowning when I looked up. “Thanks for trying to lift up my spirits. I feel like you’re treating me like I’m your teenage younger sister or something.”

Looking at me, Yoongi merely scoffed. “I never had any teenage younger sister to take care of so I wouldn’t know.”

When a visitor finally came by to my room later in the night, it was not Jimin.

Yoongi was putting his coat on to leave for the night after staying with me all day when Jungkook appeared in the doorway. There was another bouquet of white flowers in his hand—the same as the ones he had been sending me every day—and a deep scowl on his face when he exchanged gazes with Yoongi.

Yoongi clenched his jaw, obvious enough to show his dislike at Jungkook’s appearance. He didn’t even bother to greet my ex-husband as he turned to me. “Do you want me to stay a bit longer?”

I looked back and forth between them, only to have Jungkook looked away when I met his eyes, though his gaze softened just a little when he saw how uncomfortable I felt at the tension that was rising from them together. Sighing to myself, I could only choose to diffuse the situation by letting Yoongi go on his way.

“It’s okay. You have that date to go to and it won’t be long before Kara gets here anyway,” I told Yoongi, though it was clear that he didn’t exactly enjoy accepting my choice.

“You sure?” he asked again, to which I only nodded. He came to my bed while shaking his head, but he chose not to say a thing when he kissed my forehead aside from telling me to call him if I needed anything. “Promise me to let me know if anything happens.”

“I promise.”

He gave me a final nod before turning to the doorway, where Jungkook was still standing. Both of them stood facing each other for a few awkward seconds before Jungkook finally stepped aside to allow him to pass without saying a word to each other.

The moment Yoongi left, the air between us rippled into a different kind of tension. When it was only between him and Yoongi, all I could feel was their rage, their hostility against each other. But now, as Jungkook was making his way slowly towards the bed, there was a sense of awkwardness that grew between us.

Only a year ago, he was the only man that I had ever loved. Though our marriage was not perfect, he was still a huge part of me that I called home, no matter how lonely that ‘home’ would feel like at times. Tonight, it felt like he was a stranger. There was still a pull inside my chest that felt so tight I could hardly breathe, but it was not enough to have me opening my arms to welcome him with a warm embrace.

Jungkook looked around the room with a wry smile on his face. “You’ve kept the flowers,” he murmured softly as he saw all the white flowers that still remained, finding each one being kept in different vases in all sizes before looking back at me.

“Kara and my nurse, Soyeon, took care of them. If the boys had been the ones who received them, they’d end up somewhere else,” I told him with a chuckle, choosing not to tell him that there had been some that had only ended being tossed into the trash. Mostly on Yoongi’s doing, because Hoseok had always opted on passing them on to the other female nurses who had slowly grown into becoming his admirers.

Jungkook nodded as he listened, and I noticed that his grip on the bouquet had somehow tightened. “May I?” he asked, pointing at the empty chair next to my bed which Yoongi had been using all day.

“Sure,” I said, as I watched him take his seat.

“Here, these are for you,” he said to me as he handed the small bouquet of white roses to me, forcing me to peel my fingers away from the sheets that I had been clutching tightly ever since the moment he appeared at the door.

“Thank you,” I whispered. My fingers felt cold when I took the flowers from his hands. My skin crawled when our fingers touched. It was an odd feeling, when in the past, each of his gentle touches would be able to send my heart racing and my body would shudder in pleasure. It truly felt like he was no longer a part of me, as if the years we shared together had been a distant memory that was no longer mine.

I instantly pulled my hand away and kept the flowers on my lap. I didn’t miss the way he flinched when I avoided his touch, nor did I miss the look of hurt and disappointment that lingered in his eyes when he saw me clutching the flowers tightly on my lap, as if I was using them as a shield to protect me from him.

“How are you feeling?” he finally asked after a brief moment of silence. He cleared his throat and blushed when he noticed me looking up. “I, uh—I heard the surgery is in a couple of days.”

I nodded. “Two days,” I said, and my heartbeat accelerated almost immediately. He must have noticed it when my skin blanched, when the rush of panic came over me.

“Oh, shit,” he muttered. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to—”

“It’s okay,” I quickly told him. “It’s just that it feels surreal, dealing with it. I still haven’t completely wrapped my mind around it. It felt like a long time ago when I agreed to go through with it, so I’ve tried not to think about it too much. But then, suddenly it’s only days apart.”

Jungkook nodded as he tried to understand, and the concerned look on his face remained. “You’ll get through this just fine, I know it.”

I looked up, giving him a small smile. “How can you be so sure?”

Pressing his lips, Jungkook avoided my gaze for a moment. “Because you’re strong,” he finally said to me. “You’re always the stronger one between us. You’ve gotten through everything and still came out of it in one piece, whereas I could only burn things to dust and destroy everything I touched.”

Shaking my head, my words slipped out of me before I could stop them. “Not everything.”

His gaze found me, looking surprised to hear what I said, while I had to look away when once again all of the good memories that we had shared together went through my mind. My fingers clenched tighter around the flowers when I wondered just how everything fell into pieces, though what was left inside me was nothing but a numbing rage, when all the hurt he had given me had seized to give me pain since a long time ago.

Jungkook shifted in his seat, pulling my attention back to him. He was still avoiding my gaze, giving me a chance to finally take him all in. There were a lot of changes going on with him. He had always looked pristine, even when he was hiding his pain inside him. But there were also those moments in time, especially while we were battling for our divorce, when he looked terribly broken. He had stopped taking care of himself, leaving his hair constantly messy and his face looking dark and gloomy. I remembered seeing his eyes red and swollen, with deep, dark bags under them growing darker each time with all the sleepless nights he went through and all the drinking that he had resorted to just to escape from everything.

Now, he had looked much better, making good of his words to take care of himself while I was battling my own illness. His body had grown toned and broader, a sign that he had reserved back to working out and eating healthy again. His eyes were much brighter than how I had seen him last, as he had promised me time and time again that he would stop drinking so he could always be in his clear mind while he was supporting me. And then I caught the sight of his hair, looking thicker and longer as he styled them to the back of his head.

“You look good,” I said, making him look at me again. “Healthier. And you’ve kept your hair longer.”

He smiled and ran his fingers through his hair. “Not on purpose,” he admitted with a shrug. “I used to have my wife reminding me to go to the barbershop. Sometimes she would do it herself, have me sit down in the kitchen as she would cut my hair for me. Now, I can’t even decide what style of hair to choose for myself because I’d never know what would look good for me.”

I looked down just as my eyes started burning. There was nothing I could do to stop the tears from building up, threatening to flow like a river.

“Sorry, fuck—” I heard Jungkook’s voice cursing at himself before he leaned forward, catching my wrist and holding it gently in his hold. His thumb began rubbing gently on my skin and the dam of tears just broke apart. “I really need to learn how to shut up, but I just cannot help myself.”

I laughed nervously, though they came out with a round of sobbing when I continued crying. It took a moment before I calmed down. As much as I hated to admit it, the way he was softly holding my hand truly helped put myself together.

“I do miss you. That’s not a lie,” he whispered softly, meeting my eyes when I looked up. He reached out with his free hand, brushing my tears away. “You might not see it, but it feels so empty without you. I tried. I promise you, I have tried. Not to move on by seeing anyone else, because other women always remind me of you, but I try to live my life the best I could, to take care of myself the way you would do it for me, but nothing could fill up the empty space you left behind.”

Shaking my head, I tried to pull away from him. “Jungkook—”

His grip tightened, and he refused to let me go. “No, I’m not doing this to beg you to come back. I swear. I just want to tell you how I feel before I’d explode.”

Drawing a shaky breath, I tried my best to calm my heartbeat before I looked at him again. “Can we talk about something else, please?”

Jungkook looked at me for a moment longer then nodded his head. “Sure,” he said, before he proceeded in telling me things about what he had been doing lately. He made me laugh when he talked about meeting up with his friends, reuniting with his mates from college and spending the whole night playing pool.

“No, I didn’t drink,” he said to me when I asked him about it. “Been sober for almost six months now. There’s no way I can break that promise to you now,” he added, making me smile wider with relief brewing in my chest. “Eunwoo got a bit crazy though. Seconds after he agreed to join me on the next AA meeting, he ordered a full bottle of a 12 years-old Macallan and finished almost three-quarters of it on his own.”

“And the only thing you drank was Coke?”

Nodding his head, he smiled proudly. “Yes, Ma’am. I was on my best behaviour the whole night,” he said, and I felt instantly proud of him. The feeling was bittersweet, however, because I couldn’t stop wondering what our lives would have been like if he had as much control back then when we were together.

“I’m glad,” was all that I could say to him. “I’m happy to know that you’re living a better life.”

Pressing his lips together, he reached out to grab my hand. “And you are going to be there to continue watching me as I make better changes in my life, so you can witness me as I grow to be the man that you can feel proud of,” he said to me, and another set of tears escaped from me. Tightening his hold on my hand, he reached out to my chin and turned my face so I could look at him.

“Listen to me. You’re going to get through this, be stronger and healthier. I know you would. I know it’s scary, but I’m here. As much as I want to beg for you to come back to me, the only thing I need for you is to fight a good fight. We’ll get through this, and we will both have a much better life. We’ll watch each other as we both move on and find our happiness, to make the most of the rest of our lives, whether we’re doing it together or apart. Okay?”

At this point, I was a sobbing mess. The fear was still clawing from within. But his words gave me a new strength that I never knew I could still feel. It probably wouldn’t be enough to make sure that I could make it through, but it was enough to help me look at what was beyond me with a different kind of light.

As I looked into his eyes, I found a new kind of calmness that I had thought I had lost. What I saw in his eyes then would never be the same as what I had seen from him in the past, when he was the reason for me to carry on. But for now, this was more than enough. Taking one last deep, shaky breath, I looked straight into his eyes and nodded. I knew it was wrong to take comfort from the same man that had caused me a lot of pain, the same man that had also caused all the darkest times of my life.

But I knew that he was right and I needed to engulf myself in the comfort of his warmth just as long as I could find strength in them. No matter how scary it would be, I knew that I had to fight it. I needed to. And I had to survive through this no matter what.

“Okay.”

Jimin finally came to see me on the last day I had before the surgery.

It only took waking up to his smile to feel like I was coming alive again, even though I had to take a moment to make sure that I was not dreaming, that he was actually there.

I looked over his shoulder, noticing that the sky outside the window was still dark. the sun had barely come up, which meant that he came in way before the first round of nurses started. On the couch across the room, I saw Kara still deep in her sleep. She had come around the time Jungkook was ready to leave last night, and she had stayed all night to keep me company.

Out of everyone, Kara had been the one who would stay with me overnight. She has admitted once that she was worried that I would feel lonely should I ever wake up in the middle of the night without anyone by my side.

Another reason for her to stay was because of the memory we shared about my Mom. At one of the conversations that we have had where we talked about my mother, I had told her about the late-night phone calls that my Mom made while she was ill. Her eyes instantly lost their light, knowing that one of the many reasons why my mother had been left in the hospital all by herself during those times were because of her. Because my father had chosen to spend the night with his mistress instead of staying by my mother’s side.

“I would remember her whenever I think about you sleeping alone at night in this lousy hospital, afraid and lonely,” she said once after she had asked for a cot and an extra blanket for her to sleep in. “I won’t be able to sleep well at night when it happens. Take it as my redemption. I can’t change the past, but I sure as hell won’t let the same thing happen to you.”

Gentle kisses along my knuckles brought me back to the man sitting next to my bed. Jimin smiled at me when I looked at him. He had my hand in his grip, his lips pressing on my skin as he trailed soft kisses that sent delicate shivers through my body. His touches were enough to warm me up against the cold air conditioner blasting in the room.

“Morning, beautiful,” he whispered, making sure to keep it down so he wouldn’t wake Kara.

“Morning,” I answered him, still completely in a daze as I took in the sight of him. “You’re really here.”

His gaze softened as he gave me a wry smile. “I’m sorry that it took me so long to come and see you again,” he said, and only then did I realise that his voice was hoarse and weak, hidden in his whispers.

And then it took him pulling away for me to notice everything that I had missed—the wheelchair he was sitting on, the thinning hair under his beanie hat, the bags under his red-rimmed eyes, the sunken cheeks, the blisters on his lips—and my heart dropped.

“Jimin—” I choked, to which he quickly pressed a finger on my lips to stop me from talking.

“Sshh—I know, I look like hell,” he said, chuckling softly. Though the sound immediately turned into a set of coughs until he managed to take a deep breath and hold it in. “And I’ve been through hell.”

My eyes burned with tears, but I did all I could to stop them from falling. Yet I couldn’t stop myself from questioning him, “Why didn’t you say anything? Why didn’t you tell me? Why didn’t anyone—”

“Because I didn’t want you to worry about me when you already have so much to worry about on yourself,” he said to me with a sad smile. “I asked the nurses to not tell you anything. I couldn’t leave my room and let you see me when I was at my worse. You need to focus on yourself, on what’s happening tomorrow. I should be the last thing in your mind to worry about.”

Shaking my head, I leaned towards him and let him took my hand in his once again. “It’s not fair.”

He smiled at me and said, “It’s only fair. I shouldn’t be in the way of your recovery.”

“You never were. I need you, and I want to be there to support you too.”

“I know. That’s why I’m here now. I’ve done all I could to get strong enough to be here today so I could see you,” he said, pulling my hand in his so he could place my palm on his cheek, giving me a chance to feel him. “You know that I will always be here to support you.”

“Always? Promise?” He only answered me with a nod of his head, but it was enough for now. “Can you stay here with me?”

Jimin glanced over his shoulder and tipped his head. “Will your guardian let me?”

I looked over to Kara’s sleeping form and smiled. “She has to.”

And indeed she did. Kara knew how much I had missed Jimin and how his presence helped make a lot of changes that she even let Jimin use the cot that she had neglected the night before so he could rest once in a while. Even the nurses had come to let Jimin take his medicines without him returning to his room.

“Told you that things would be easier if we had just been placed in the same room,” Jimin joked at Soyeon when she came into the room while shaking her head at him. His comment surprised me as I had never thought he would even consider it.

“You asked them for a room transfer?”

Jimin shrugged with a sheepish smile. “Hey, I tried. I’ve thought about it ever since you got sick from your trips down the halls at night to see me.”

I looked at him, not believing what I just heard. Never once in my mind I had considered it possible for us to share a room that I had pushed away every hope of making it happen. I was completely speechless that all I could do was hold his hand. It was Soyeon who spoke next, breaking the moment we were sharing.

“If you want, I can submit another request once you’ve gone through the surgery,” she said, while Jimin and I exchanged looks.

“Can you do that?”

Soyeon glanced at Kara who was now giving her a hopeful look and smiled. “I can ask your doctor to have permission for transfer,” she answered me with a wink.

“If Doctor Kim agrees, then it’ll leave only one last hurdle that might get in the way,” Jimin said, breaking whatever spell we were in before either one of us even had a chance to celebrate the possible good news.

“What is it?”

Jimin gave me a sad smile and said, “Your ex-husband.”

It was finally the day of the surgery.

Everyone had been here with me since this morning, waiting in the room with me. While my anxiety had peaked through the roof the day before, I was surprisingly calm ever since I had woken up this morning. Meanwhile, everyone else seemed to be on the edge since the moment I woke up and it even got worse when the nurse came in just one hour before I was supposed to be taken to the operating room, handing me the last medicine for the day.

The frown on Hoseok’s face kept on slipping out no matter how hard he tried to hide it behind his smile. Even the years that had passed during the period of time when we fell apart couldn’t change the fact that I knew my brother. That I would be able to catch on to his emotions so easily despite his efforts of hiding them from me.

He was not the only one who was restless, as Yoongi kept fidgeting in his seat. He had been silent all day, tension continued to roll out of his shoulders as he sat with Hoseok across the room.

As I was forbidden to consume any food or water, Kara found nothing to do to distract herself and she had opted to stay by my side. I had to respect her for trying her best to stay calm, though the moment she held my hand and she started praying for the two of us, it almost felt like I was the one calming her down until her fingers stopped shaking.

“It’ll be okay,” I finally said to her when she gave me yet another forced smile the moment our eyes met. But everyone in the room knew that I was speaking for all of us, especially myself, when I added, “Everything’s going to be fine.”

Jimin came to my room just when it was almost time for me to go. He came in on his wheelchair, with Nurse Soyeon pushing him into the room. Everyone instantly stepped aside to give us space, allowing Jimin to settle down next to the bed, where he took my hand to hold and he could lean in just close enough to give me a kiss.

“I’ll be here until the moment they come to pick you up,” he whispered to me between his gentle kisses, then gave me another promise before he pulled away, “And I’ll be here when you wake up.”

“Promise?”

“I promise.”

After that moment, time seemed to stand still. Neither of my family dared to speak, afraid that any word they said would burst any bubble that we found ourselves in, to allow the reality to sink in and take over the serene feeling we were having. But they kept hovering around me, making sure that I was calm and ready, though I felt more numb than I was probably supposed to.

It wasn’t until the moment when Soyeon returned with another nurse from our floor, pushing a gurney into the room with the help of an orderly, when the silent tension in the room broke apart.

“It’s time,” Soyeon said to me with a calm voice that did nothing to stop my heartbeat from pacing rapidly in my chest. Jimin must have sensed the change in my mood, because he immediately pulled me to him and held me tight, whispering sweet words to calm me down.

“It’s okay, baby. Take a deep breath. Close your eyes and focus on me,” he kept telling me, making sure that I followed his words until I was breathing calmly again.

“Okay, I’m ready,” I nodded at Soyeon after giving Jimin one last kiss and sending one last smile to my family.

As everyone stepped back and I was carefully transferred from the bed to the gurney, the numbness returned to me and I let myself to be engulfed in it. Even the pain that came piercing through my spine during the transfer couldn’t snap me out of it. The sense of calm felt even stronger as Jimin grabbed my hand and gave me one last squeeze only moments before the orderly began pushing me out of the room.

“I’ll come with you,” I heard Hoseok said, as if watching me leave the room had snapped him out of his trance and he quickly rushed to walk alongside the gurney as we left our family behind. The last thing I saw when I took one last glance was Yoongi placing his arm around Kara’s shoulders as she cried soundlessly, and Jimin smiling at me as he placed his palm over Kara’s hand that was resting on his shoulder.

The trip from my room towards the operating section on our floor felt like an eternity. I barely paid attention to our surroundings as we made a few turns down the hallways, focusing more on my breathing pattern as I kept myself calm, until I suddenly saw him standing not too far from the doorways leading to the operating area.

“Jungkook,” I called out to him as the gurney slowed down to a stop right where he was waiting for me. He nodded briefly at Hoseok before he turned to me, giving me a warm smile despite the way his eyes were watching me closely as if he was afraid I would disappear.

“You came,” I said, and he nodded.

“I decided I’d wait for you out here so you could have a moment with your family,” he told me, and my eyes moved to his hands, where I found yet another bouquet of white flowers, and his smile widened as he followed my gaze.

“These flowers will be waiting for you in your room to greet you once you return,” Jungkook said, before he leaned down, pressing his lips on my forehead as he whispered. “You’re going to be alright.”

His eyes were glassy with tears when he straightened up, but he forced himself to smile as he brushed gently at my cheek for one last time before he stepped back, allowing the gurney to pass. I kept my eyes on him until I could no longer see him, and Hoseok pulled my attention right before he had to let me go.

“We’ll be waiting for you out here,” he said to me while squeezing my shoulder gently. I could tell that he was trying his best not to cry in front of me, so I put on my brave face and smiled.

“Make sure to buy me some of my favourite ice creams when I come back, will you?”

He nodded and chuckled softly. “I’ll fill up the fridge with them for you.”

“Ready?”

The nurse that was going to assist the surgeons was the one I was not familiar with, but she was friendly and nice that I stayed calm despite the complicated preparations that would have scared me away. I already felt slightly intimidated just minutes ago, when I was pushed into this room with only strangers standing around me. But the thought of my family who would be waiting right outside those doors, and knowing that Dr. Kim would also be here to assist the procedure, all had done more than calm my nerves that all I had to do was wait until this moment would come.

“I’m going to put this mask on you. Just breathe in normally, and you will feel sleepy in no time. Just don’t panic, and focus on counting down or just think of good things, okay?”

“Okay,” I told her, nodding my head before I let her put the breathing mask on my face.

She gave me a smile that was hidden under her mask as I settled back down on the bed, while she carried on with the preparations, helping the surgeons and welcoming Dr. Kim as he came into my line of sight.

His voice was calm, but I barely paid attention to any word he said to me as he introduced the other doctors that had come in with him. I only responded with a nod to each time he spoke, until he instructed me to continue breathing as the only thing they needed to do was to wait until the anaesthetic drugs they had given me would take effect.

Everything around me seemed to move in slow motion afterwards. It felt as if I had left my body and I was watching things unfolding from the outside looking in. I followed the nurse’s instruction as I began breathing normally, taking deep breaths while counting down slowly, until I started to feel heavy with sleep. It didn’t take long until I finally gave in as there was never a fight in me to stop me from getting under, and I felt myself drifting away merely seconds after.

That was when everything happened.

They had all said that when you went under, your whole senses would not be able to tell you about anything happening around you, leaving you completely oblivious to what they were doing to your body.

That was not what seemed to be happening to me.

My senses were completely numb, but I was still there. I was still present. My body was no longer moving, but I was terribly aware. A thick blanket of darkness folded around me, cloaking me from the world that still existed around me. I had lost the ability to feel a thing. There was no pain, not a hint of the slightest of touches they made on me, but I knew they were all there.

My mind registered their presence in the form of shadows. Looming, hovering, moving around me while I was rooted as their center. I could feel their movements even through the fog of darkness, but I could feel none of their touch. I heard nothing but a steady hum, drowning me deeper into the darkness, though some of the voices I heard made it seem more like I was drowning underwater.

And then it happened, and suddenly, I could hear it all almost too clearly.

It started with a steady beep, before it began to rise, sounding louder by the second, and then it went faster. The humming sound around me began to rise as well, growing steadily intense. They sounded almost similar to voices of people shouting, only that everything was muffled, like everything was happening under the current of water. The beeping noise grew louder, breaking through the fog, and then louder, turning into an alarming sound as the shouting continued.

An odd feeling of chill washed over me.

And then everything went still.

Author’s note:

I’m sorry this took a long time, and I know that you must be hating me for that ending lol

Don’t worry, every single question you may have at the moment will be answered soon. We’re so close to the final chapters and I am terribly nervous about it, not going to lie. But, before we can finally get there, we’ll be having an extra chapter coming in the way.

Yes, your requests have been answered. We’ll be getting into Taehyung’s side of the story on the next chapter before we can find more answers to what had happened to all of them in the past.

Stay tuned for the next update. Thank you for all of your support!

—  © 2021 Yoonia, all rights reserved. reposting/modifying of any kind is not allowed. translations are not allowed.

#bangtansorciere #ficswithluv #btswriterscollective #btsbookclub #jimin scenario #jimin fanfic #jimin fluff #jimin angst #jimin x reader #bts jimin #park jimin #jungkook scenario #jungkook fanfic #jungkook fluff #jungkook angst #jungkook x reader #taehyung scenario #taehyung fanfic #taehyung fluff #taehyung angst #taehyung x reader #bts taehyung #kim taehyung #bts scenario #bts fanfic #kpop scenario #kpop writing #kpop fanfic #bts fluff #bts angst

[kunimikat]

When they find out you don’t love them anymore

(Heyyy, so there might be a few grammar errors, but this one is pretty long so hold on) Also do you want the good endings to these? Idk just asking

It started when you didn’t hang out as much with him

You’d make up excuses, ignore, or even give small lies

But he didn’t really take it in any way other than it was you having a hard time with school and stress

So he let you distance yourself

But when you started getting further, and started purposely giving out of the box reasons to not be around him

His gut started to churn

So each day he’d tried to get some way to get your attention

Monday

“Hey dumbass, let’s cook breakfast for the rest of the idiots today, just you and me.”

But when he went to get you up you just turned the other way. He rolled his eyes, a small smile making its way onto his face. The ash-blonde propped a knee up onto the edge of your bed, his hands caging you between them. Yet you barely reacted and instead you mumbled “Go away Bakugo, aren’t you supposed to cook with someone else today?” A hurt expression washed over his face in an instant, though he just thought it was just you being groggy. He started tickling you, a devilish smirk on his features, but you suddenly push his face back forcefully.

“I said get the hell out Bakugo! If it was you you’d be fuming when I try to wake you up so just go!”

You pulled the cover back up, and that was it. It hurt Bakugo even more when you didn’t even look back. But he just snarled and pent it up.

Breakfast didn’t taste as good as usual.

.

Tuesday

You were laughing with Todoroki when Bakugo entered the classroom. And he already didn’t like it as soon as he saw your hand on his shoulder, your leg brushed up against him. He immediately went over and snatched you back into his chest. You scoff “Bakugo- The hell?” You smack his hand off of you. You glare at him before nodding to Todoroki, not sparing Bakugo a glance as you walked back to your seat, starting conversation with Jirou as if that didn’t just happen. Bakugo stared wide eyed at your back then to a smirking Todoroki. He stood frozen. “Just lay off my s/o half n’ half.” He mumbleds as he went to his seat. ‘Was I....was I the wrong one?’ Bakugo jerked his head to the side to get rid of the thought. ‘Like hell I’m wrong.’

But he felt a pit in his stomach remembering your hand on Todoroki’s shoulder.

.

Wednesday

Bakugo wanted to take you hiking with him since you guys had been doing what you’ve wanted to do for the past few months.

But he didn’t expect you to be so upset.

“Really Bakugo? We always have to do some lame shit when you want to go somewhere, do you really like hiking anyway?”

He furrowed his eyebrows in annoyed confusion because you even asked that question.

“No shit, I’ve told you how many times I go hiking, do you not fucking listen? Last time I checked you ain’t deaf, so I thought you’d know by now.”

You quirked your brow up and rolled your eyes, walking off. Bakugo grabs your arm dragging you back, your faces so close your noses are touching.

“The fuck is your problem today? For the past few days you been bitching off, the hell is up with-“

“You, you’re my problem.”

And you pushed him back, opening your phone as you started to text someone and turn the corner in the hall.

Bakugo didn’t want to acknowledge the tears that streamed down his face as he walked to his dorm.

.

Thursday

Bakugo won the challenge in today’s lesson overall, yet he couldn’t help but look over and see your eyes on Todoroki the whole time. Even when he pushed himself, blew the biggest explosions, even won the damn thing. He couldn’t even get an ounce of his own s/o’s attention.

Bakugou huffs as he stormed to where and Todoroki were. He wrapped a arm around your waist. But he didn’t pay attention on the unimpressed expression on your face. But he did hear when you called back to Todoroki, “You did your best out there! See you tomorrow!”

And just like that you got of his arms and walked back to the locker rooms. But he grabbed your hand pulling you back almost instantaneously. “The fuck? You’re not gonna say anything to me? Is this a fucking joke?” A perplexed and pained expression on his face. But he was tempted to really do something when you sighed and started to walk off. “Yeah good job Bakugo, not like you need a boost in your ego though.”

For some reason hanging out with Kirishima at the arcade was the most amount of happiness Bakugo has had all week.

But as soon as he got back to the dorms the same depressing feeling washed over him.

Friday

“But why? Why don’t you love me anymore damn it!”

It was raining hard, the droplets kept mixing with the harsh rain as you both stood over the now soiled picnic food. He tried, he tried everything to get you to listen to him. But now you both just stood silently in the rain.

“I’m sorry Bakugo...it’s just I’m not really interested anymore. It not like I hate you or anything-“

“BULLSHIT!”

Bakugo was seething, rain starting to evaporate on his hands as they flared up.

“This past week...no,fuck, MONTH! You just cast me to the side like I’m a piece of fucking scum! I try...I try so fucking hard, and I’ve never even been in a damn relationship before! So I know I’m not perfect, I FUCKING KNOW. I KNOW I’m not like a prince like fucking half n half, but damn don’t you see I’m trying to work it out? I haven’t felt this much for anyone before Y/N! WHY... WHY DO YOU HATE ME SO MUCH? WHAT DID I DO SO WRONG? FUCK Y/N I’LL EVEN CHANGE! JUST.. Bakugo went quiet as a sob wracked his body, leaving him speechless for a moment. His voice cracks, “..don’t leave me alone Y/N, I don’t want to feel alone again after all this time.”

Yet even after Bakugo crouched to the ground, head in hands. He hears a disappointed sigh, his head almost gets whiplash from how fast he shot his head up. You looked at him with cold eyes and looked down at him with no interest.

“Listen Bakugo, I tried being nice about it but, I don’t love you anymore. I thought you were stronger than this, I guess not. What a shame. You brought me out here to say all of that? I’m cold, and I’m heading back to the dorms, but I did clean up the picnic during your tantrum. Sorry, Bakugo.”

Yet the apology was so cold it just felt like blurred lines of sentences came from your mouth to him. The rain drowning out any emotions other than the hurt and pain his heart felt. Bakugo sat in the muddy grass, his eyes blown as he reached pitifully at your form trudging farther and farther through the mud.

Aftermath

He just wasn’t the same.

Bakugo was even more aggressive but most times he’d take it out on the people that got too close to him.

But when he’s not angry, he’s just silent

Dozing off the all of a sudden at random times in class you’d look over to see his desk charred and he doesn’t even realize it

He’d had constant stress from the piling work on his desk as he sat in bed and stared at it with no motivation

Even though he got back on track, and a bit better, it still gnawed at the back of his head everyday of what he should’ve done instead what he did

During Hero Training when he’d hear you cheer for Todoroki, he knew he was never going to get a sincere apology

He knew he was never going to hear you cheer like you cheered Todoroki on

He knew he was never going to get the attention he wanted when he saw your arms linked with your group of friends during graduation as you walked off.

He knew he was going to never fill the void he thought he long forgot even after how many years of highschool he graduated, and how many years of hero work

Nothing and no one could make him feel the way you used to.

He noticed when you leaned out of his touch

Or the small unimpressed looks you’d have when you guys would kiss

And when he would ask you’d wave it off like it was nothing

Even when you surprisingly pushed him off of you as the class was doing movie nights, sitting with space in between

Midoriya noticed every single little thing

Yet when he confronted you about it you waved it off again and left before he could even ask you anything more

So, he decided to do a few things for you just in case he did something wrong and wanted to make it up

Monday

He placed a small gift on your desk. It was a small cat-version of all might in a box. At first you smiled, but then checked the signed name tag, he nearly screamed when you scoffed at it and just tossed it into your bag. He felt his heart clench but payed it no mind. He planned the right time to come in and walked right over to you.

“H-Hey Y/N! Did you like the little gift I bought?”

He could see the clearly fake smile on your face when you nod you head, but quickly dismiss him as you see Kirishima enter the room and walking over to him. Excitedly greeting him. Like he just gave you the gift instead.

Midoriya whimpered and gripped his bag straps. Ignoring how his stomach felt like it flipped.

Tuesday

Midoriya’s almost broke down when he went in to hug you in front of Kirishima and instead you went over and gave the redhead a ‘friendly’ hug.

“Hey Y/N! Are you and Midoryia busy or something?”You shook your head and went on in conversation, blatantly ignoring Midoryia, making him kind of want to throw up lunch. He frowned because, didn’t you guys plan something? Why did you lie?

The only person who actually paid attention was Bakugo, and even he felt a little bad. So he grabbed Kirishima’s collar and pulled Kirishima with him, locking eyes with Midoryia with an unknown expression. Then rolling his eyes and looking off. But Midoryia knew for sure he owed him a favor. He tried grabbing your hand but you pulled away.

“Sorry Izu, I uh...I have to go out for a bit.”

“But weren’t we going to go to the cafe today?”

“I know Izuku but...my friend texted me and there was a change in plans. I’ll see you later though!”

Yet he didn’t see you for the entire evening. He wrote down your conversation in a notebook. Analyzing what he could’ve said wrong. He didn’t even realize frustrated tears smearing the words.

Wednesday

People started to notice the nervous tics Midoryia did when you’d start talking to Kirishima.

“Are you okay Midoryia? Your hand is bleeding. Do you need to head to the nurse?”

“Ah! I-it’s okay Todoroki! It’s nothing, really!”

He didn’t want to leave the room right now, especially with the weird feeiling in his gut when he saw you lean in a little too close to Kirishima made his hand feel numb.

Thursday

Midoriya noticed your small lingering touches and stares on Kirishima during training. He even noticed you were quieter when cheering for him than you were Kirishima.

He noticed you smiled more at his jokes than his

He noted you suddenly liked the things you said you always hated when Kirishima said was into it.

And he kept in mind that evening you barely looked his way. He frowned at the thought and decided to walk over to you. But instead he wanted bawl his eyes out when you made eye contact, and instead of greeting him you started walking forward with Kirishima.

Friday

“I can’t find a single note on what I did so wrong to make you hate me so much.”

You couldn’t even realize the boy in front of you. Blind rage all over his face, fists clenched, and shaking body. All because of you.

You honestly wanted to cry because you were so used to the loving looks he’d always give you to the cold and angry one he had on now. But you knew you didn’t deserve to feel this way. You knew what you did was wrong yet, you can’t get rid of the guilt washing over yourself as you finally locked eyes with him.

“I...I give you so much time and attention. Love...appreciation, patience. So much fucking patientce Y/N. Yet, yet you just throw it away.”

The dead grass crunched under his weight as his knees slightly buckled. The snot and tears now covering a majority of his face as he cried. His sobs sounding louder and louder in the silent evening. He bit his lip as he clenched the part of his shirt over his heart.

“It..it hurts so much, why, why don’t you love me like I love you?”

He clenched his teeth before repeatly beating the same spot on his chest. You looked in horror, then rushed over to get him to stop. He grabs you hand just as you were about to stop him.

He looks at you with such a broken gaze. Puffy eyes, and tears still streaming down his face as his scarred hand holds onto yours. Quivering lip and clenched fist.

“Was I just never enough?”

Your eyes started to fill with tears as you covered your mouth. Shaking your head repeatedly, as words couldn’t leave your mouth.

“I’ve written so many lines of the possibilities of what I could’ve said wrong. Or what I gave you. How I kissed you, how I touched you, Y/N, I-...”

“It’s not that you did anything Izuku! It’s just...I fell in love with someone else and I didn’t know how to end it.”

You looked down in guilt.

“Haha...my prediction was right. I was just never lived up to what you wanted.”

“Izuku I-“

“It’s getting late L/N, let’s go.”

It was a quiet walk back to the dorms.

Aftermath

He just kind of went airplane mode

He wasn’t the same mumble-awkward teen he usually was

But instead he’d mostly stare out the window

Or endlessly write notes

He became engrossed in his studies

Rarely going out, barely talking to anyone, and even not eating cause he felt like it would interrupt his studying

When out on his patrols he’ll try to save anyone and everyone he can by himself.

And when he fails it sends him into a complete spiral

It makes him feel the same way he did that day when you two separated

Like he didn’t do enough so it was all his fault that it ended in this way

Regular panic/anxiety attacks

Bakugo actually leaving him alone and instead checking up on him and making sure he eats (forcibly)

Todoroki, Uraraka, and Iida routinely make sure he was actually going to sleep on time, or getting any at all

It did take him a while to actually get over it

And it totally affected how he looked at future relationships

When he does get with someone everytime he just suffocates them with attention, gifts, and anything he feels he isn’t doing right he’ll do it 110%

So a majority of his early adulthood he spent single- or in short-term relationships

Eventually he stayed single for awhile since he’d always compare them to you

Though he does have days where wish it was different

Wishes it was you next to him when he woke up

Wishes that you would hold his hand when he has a bad day at work

But when he has the bad days where the anxiety, hero work, and pressure gets to him.

He just thinks of the way you used to smile at him.

Eyyy so it was originally gonna be 3 but I realized I made it a little too long. I basically had really shit wifi so that was a part of the small hiatus. But also I was originally gonna be MHA boyos x Twitch Streamer Reader. Buuut Tumblr was cracked and deleted it so. 🧍Also do you want a part 2? Cause if not I’ll make my first fluff HCS for Valentine’s. Requests are open! So go wild

#bnha x reader #angst #mha headcanons #mha imagines #mha izuku #bnha x gn!reader #bnha x female reader #bnha x male reader #bnha x gender neutral reader #bnha x poc!reader #bnha hcs #mha x female reader #mha x male reader #mha oneshot #mha scenarios #mha x gender neutral reader #mha x gn!reader #izuku midoria x reader #midoriya x reader #midoriya x y/n #midoriya angst #bakugou angst #bakugou x reader #katsuki x y/n #bakugou headcanons #katsuki bakugō #mha #bnha #bnha angst

[monsterfuneral]

the summer of 1988 | the lost boys

Relationship: Poly!The Lost Boys x Fem!Reader

Summary: Revenge is a dark and dangerous road to go down, especially when the people you seek revenge against are all vampires. 

Words: 4.5k

Warnings/Tags: Kidnapping, surf nazis, child endangerment but no child injury, brief descriptions of torture and injury from torture, blood, weapons, just general violence tbh, angst, swearing, Star says fuck, fluff/comfort at the end

Author’s Note: This took way to long to actually finish but I’m happy that it’s finally here. This is something I’ve been working on since late November/early December thanks to writers block so hopefully it actually turned out okay

REQUESTS OPEN

(please read my “I do NOT write” section before sending in anything <3)

---

The boardwalk was probably the most quiet you had seen in weeks. There were no exciting shows being hosted on the beach or any new rides to visit, and it being a Monday close to closing hours made it so the boardwalk was a lot less crowded than usual. The only people that you had seen tonight were groups of teenagers that left early on in the night, not risking being caught by their unknowing parents as they broke curfew with their friends. By default though it made business in the record shop sluggish, giving you the opportunity to organize the records that were going to be put on the shelves in the morning. 

You had just sat back down on the stool behind the counter when the bell above the door rang. Your boyfriends and their smallest companion came walking through one by one. Paul was the first to greet you with a flirtatious smile as he leaned over the counter to ask you what you’d suggest he buy. 

You playfully rolled your eyes and said “Yeah, like you have the money.” making Marko and David Chuckle from where they stood behind the other blonde. 

The boys left Laddie in your care while they went off to feed, obviously not wanting to take the young human with them to witness their brutal feeding routine. So you put on a record that Laddie had come to love thanks to Paul, and turned the volume up a little louder than it usually would be during work hours. He sat on your stool swinging his legs back and forth while bopping his head along to the hypnotic guitar solo of ‘Don’t Fear The Reaper’. He watched you go through the bins and organize any of the records that had been misplaced throughout the day. Waiting for you to finally clap your hands softly announce that you both were finally free to go. Laddie smiled up at you after you ruffled a hand through his hair and shrugged his overnight bag onto your shoulder. 

The two of you were having a casual conversation about a new comic he had gotten from Sam when a guy approached you. He was an unpleasantly familiar face, a member of the surf Nazi’s that took a liking to coming into the record shop and bothering you on occasion with pathetic attempts at flirting. It was no surprise he singled in on you and started walking up to you with a confident swagger that he certainly would not have if the boys were standing behind you. He was as unpleasant as ever, complimenting your outfit that consisted of an old leather jacket that used to belong to David, ripped jeans, and an old band shirt that had a rip at the collar. You looked at him tiredly and attempted to weave your way out of the conversation but he simply would not budge. Laddie clutched the back of your jacket anxiously, waiting for the intimidating man to finally move on. You had to suppress the eyeroll that threatened to come forth when he started talking about how ‘killer’ the waves were today, his smile big as he gestured out towards the sparkling ocean.

“Listen man,” You started, looking back up at the surf Nazi- Derek you think he said his name was- grabbing Laddie’s hand and gently pushing him further behind you protectively “I really gotta go okay? My friends are waiting for me at the entrance and will totally come looking for me if I don’t go.” You hoped he didn’t call you out on your bullshit. You just wanted to go home and change into something more comfortable and give Laddie some actual food to eat that wasn’t boardwalk cotton candy. 

Just like always when he would come around, you got a disgusting gnawing feeling in your stomach, a feeling that told you to run, run, get the fuck out of there. This time though it felt like it had been cranked up to ten. You anxiously glanced around at the other shops. The walkway you were practically cornered in was entirely empty thanks to the boardwalk getting ready to close down for the night. Laddie reached to tug on your hand silently making you look down. 

Your other hand inched closer and closer to your jacket pocket, where you had a switchblade tucked into just in case something like this were to ever happen. The inevitable moment where you’d have to protect yourself and Laddie from any oncoming danger. The rising tension between your boyfriends and the surf Nazis didn’t exactly help either, not that you could blame them.

“Oh come on babe stay a little longer. Me and my buddies were actually about to go get something to eat, you should join us!” He insisted, his attempt at a sweet smile only seeming more and more sinister the longer you stuck around. 

You frowned and raised a brow before shaking your head “No man, I really do gotta go. I’ve had a long day and I’d really just like to leave, and like I said my friends are waiting for me.” 

He raised his hands up in surrender, his smile not faltering “Hey no problemo. Maybe next time right, honey?” You had to suppress the disgusted shudder at the pet name. He stepped aside with his hands behind his back and let the two of you go, you sighed and brought Laddie closer to your side, continuing your journey to the parking lot a little faster this time. 

Once at your car you unlocked it and opened the back door, dropping the Laddie’s overnight bag onto the messy back seat and shutting the door, the sound echoing through the mostly empty parking lot. 

You heard feet shuffling behind you but brushed it off, assuming it was just Laddie walking to the other side of your car. Until you felt a hand clap down on your shoulder and slam you against the drivers side door. Your cheek was pressed against the cold metal of your car and you shivered when you felt a puff of warm air on your skin. 

“I thought you said your friends were waiting for you?” A harsh voice whispered against the shell of your ear. His body kept you pinned to your car leaving you with very little wiggle room, but you were able to dig through your pocket and fish out your knife, clicking it open and blindly stabbing behind you. His hand came around to try and grab your arm but you were able to knick him in the process, the sharp blade slicing across the top of his hand and then through the skin of his forearm making him yelp in surprise, hissing as he clutched the wounds that now had blood bubbling to the surface.

“You bitch!” He growled, his now bloodied hand burying itself in your hair, pulling your head back and slamming your forehead harshly against your car door, your head gave an instant throb at the assault and black spots dotted your vision. You felt your knees hit the asphalt below, not even realizing you were falling by the time your head was resting on the ground. All you could make out in the haze of your blackening vision was Laddie’s beaten up shoes frantically running to your side of the car, towards the danger. You felt your heart pick up and you wanted to yell at him to stay put but no words came out, a pathetic squeak coming from your parted lips instead. You could hear the faint echo of his voice yelling at you to get up. Your eyes were starting to slip closed. All sound started to fade, the only thing left being a loud never ending ringing as your body felt colder and colder before everything went silent.

---

The smell of blood was thick in the air, dark red staining the sandy shore beneath their feet being the remaining evidence of what had happened just fifteen minutes prior. David flicks the remains of his cigarette into the flames and walks himself over to the water, attempting to clean off the drying blood before it cakes itself in his beard. He took his gloves off and stuffed them into his coat pocket so he could wet his hands and wash the blood from his face. 

“We’re all ready to go.” Dwayne said from behind him, his voice as level and soothing as always, even after feeding. His leather jacket was zipped up, not bothering to clean himself off beyond his face. Unlike Paul and Marko who had taken to splashing each other while attempting to clean the blood from their own faces.

Something was off about tonight, he couldn't place what or how, it was just something. A feeling that’s been gnawing at his senses since he stepped into the record shop to drop Laddie off with you. At first it was barely there, like an itch he couldn’t scratch, but as the night dragged on it was getting harder to ignore. 

David stood from his crouched position and pulled his gloves back over his fingers “Everything’s good?” He asked, not turning away from the water just yet. 

“Whatever’s left will be picked up by the rain that’s rolling in later tonight.” Dwayne answered, staring out at the water with his friend and tilting his head back to look at the moon. It was almost completely full, beaming down on the group as the stars around it sparkled. He side-eyed David, seeing how stiff his body was, the occasional facial twitch as his brows threatened to draw together. They could all feel the shifting in the air, a thickening blanket of unease driving their senses crazy and the brunette could tell David was close to dropping the calm façade. 

“Let’s get out of here already then!” Paul called from where he was standing in the water, itching to finally get to your apartment. 

David gave one last sigh before taking one step backwards from the wave that barely grazed his shoe, finally tearing his eyes away from the water and coaxing himself out of his own head. Dwayne was already turning around and heading over to the line of bikes, trailing just behind the two blondes. With one last look at the fire, David set off with them too, his fingers already inching closer to his pack of cigarettes. 

---

You couldn’t even tell how long you had been tied to this chair, time lost in the pain that pulsed through your entire body. It was hard to focus on anything else other than the loud sound of rushing blood in your ears, almost deafening now that you were left to stew in your pain. Derek had gone off deeper into the warehouse, weaving around the almost endless racks of stolen clothes, beat up chairs that had the stuffing half hanging out of the bottom, a coffee table that had three different ashtrays sat atop it. Next to the ash trays was a picture that had a faded picture of his friends tucked behind the broken glass. You couldn’t take your eyes off of it, your mind still reeling at his revelation earlier in the night.

He had slapped down an all too recognizable horror comic, the very same one Sam showed you a few months after Max was killed. Derek’s copy was worn down from constant reading and had sticky notes protruding from the tops of the pages. He angrily told you how he had been out on a beer run one night and came back to the boys throwing his friend’s mauled bodies into the very same bonfire he had lit up not even two hours beforehand. How he was left with no answers until he found ‘Vampires Everywhere!’. 

Your whole body went rigid and cold, an acidic rock forming in your throat as you finally realized that he *knew*, he was all too aware of the boy’s undead status. Derek demanded you tell him the location of the coven’s hideout. When you wouldn’t budge he landed a blow on your jaw,  your cheek, hell even your stomach wasn’t safe from his violent outburst. You were shaking from the pain by the time he was done, his fingernails biting into the skin of your cheeks as he forced you to look into his eyes and he asked once again. 

“Where do those freaks hide out during the day?” 

To which you replied a choked and raspy “Fuck… You.” 

He was finally on his last nerve when he let out a strangled growl, pushing himself away from you, your face being forced to the side with his rough treatment, the force almost sending the old wooden chair you were tied in backwards. He stormed away, the thunk of his boots echoing loudly throughout the warehouse. Growing more and more distant until all you could hear was the radio that had so ironically been playing a Dead Kennedys song. 

You were sent into overdrive, scraping the ropes harshly against a nail that was poking out of the rickety wooden chair he had decided to strap you too. Your shoulders ached from the hours of having your hands tied behind your back, but a little more pain was worth the inevitable escape. So you worked faster, bringing the rope closer to the wood and the nail, your fingernails digging into your palms as the rope started to burn your bare wrists, having hiked up the sleeves to your jacket. 

Once you were finally up from the chair you ran over to the side table looking for something, anything you could use against Derek. You carefully moved the ashtrays and empty beer cans aside, fear gripping your throat so tight that you could hardly breathe. You let out a quiet frustrated sound as you came up short. There was nothing, no other tables, the whole room seemed to just be filled with useless junk, not a single weapon in sight.

You could hear the rope straining, sending your heart into your throat. The adrenaline coursing through you only escalated as you thought of Laddie and where he could possibly be in this place. You hadn’t seen him since being knocked out in the parking lot, but he had to be here. You could feel the rope tearing more and more until it finally gave one last loud snap, your burning wrists rubbed raw and red that ached to move. You grimaced as you urgently began untying the ropes around your ankles.

“Looking for this?”

You whipped around, Derek was standing at the entrance of the clothing rack maze, waving your own knife at you while holding Laddie against him with one arm secured over his chest. Laddie’s finger dug into Derek’s forearm, unable to push him away thanks to the loss of the strength he had as a half vampire. Derek tucked your knife in his back pocket and pulled Laddie closer to him. He shook his head and let out a long sigh, almost like you were a child that had misbehaved.

“I knew I should have tied you up with cords instead, too late now I guess.” He hit the side of his own head lightly with the palm of his hand, a smirk forming on his lips “How silly of me, right?”

You anxiously glanced back and forth from him and Laddie, the pit in your stomach was getting ready to swallow you whole at this point. Laddie looked at you fearfully, quietly muttering your name. You had to stop yourself from stepping closer out of instinct to comfort the child that you had grown so close to in the past year. 

“I thought I’d give you a little more motivation… you know to tell me where your buddies like to hang.” He shifted the wooden stake into his other hand and scratched the side of his head with the sharpened tip, almost as a way to taunt you with his carelessness “You know since you wouldn’t tell me when I was hurting you I just thought why not break out the big guns right?” 

“What the fuck is wrong with you?!” You yelled, lip trembling “He’s just a child! He’s not even a vampire! He has nothing to do with any of this!”

“Oh sure he does! If he’s what gets me my answers then he has everything to do with this.” Derek chuckled, shrugging his shoulders, seemingly indifferent to the situation “I mean I don’t *want* to kill a kid but come on, you’re not really giving me any other choice here baby.” 

The casual usage of the pet name made you want to gag. His eyes were staring you up and down hugging Laddie closer to his body and challenged you with an eye squint, as if saying *”come get him, I dare you.”* 

You watched Derek’s every move, wishing just this once that you *were* a vampire. He dropped the hand that held the wooden stake down to his side, an angrier expression morphing on his features as he steps just a little closer. He was red in the face and a vein was starting to protrude from his neck, the visible anger was a lot scarier now that Laddie was in his arms, a ticking time bomb ready to explode any second. 

“Well?” He asked, tone dark and steady, even with the anger that was so evident “What’ll it be sweet cheeks?” 

Before you could even think up an answer a loud echoing boom sounded throughout the warehouse, making the three of your freeze. One rack of clothes after another was knocked to the ground with a loud clang while the wind whistled in the distance. 

“It’ll be nothing, you fucking piece of shit.” Star growled out, pinning Derek to the concrete ground, the heel of her shoe digging harshly into the thin fabric of his muscle tank top. Her features were sharp and her yellow eyes were narrowed down at the much larger man. She didn’t even flinch when he tried to pry her leg off of him, sputtering under the pressure, unable to breathe. Her strength had definitely maximized since she transitioned to a full vampire with Michael, not so easily thrown around now that she had strength that almost rivaled David’s. So it was safe to say he was going nowhere unless she allowed him to. 

Dwayne and David were the first ones to get to you. Dwayne swept Laddie up into his arms while David examined your bruised features, “You’re gonna be okay.” He said softly, cupping under your chin gently, the leather of his gloves being a welcome coolness against your heated skin. 

“Get them out of here,” Dwayne said to Michael, who was crouched next to Derek.

You could practically see the steaming anger roll off of the curly haired brunette in waves, knowing that over the year of him being a vampire he too had grown close to Laddie and saw him like a little brother who he felt the need to protect. 

“Hope you guys are up for dessert.” David’s voice echoed throughout the warehouse unlike any of the other’s. He looked back at you, and just by how his eyes flashed yellow you knew Derek would probably be in pieces by the time the six of them were done with him. 

They were all livid, and while David and Dwayne were the best at hiding it, Paul was not. He was fuming, practically foaming at the mouth as Marko had to hold him back from pouncing on Derek too early. After all he had threatened the life of their mate, and not only that but a child that was formerly a part of their coven as well, he had crossed all of the lines. Usually in hypothetical situations you had thought of you would always think Marko would be the angriest. But given how protective and clingy Paul could be, how he would practically purr at the mere sight of you, it made sense why he was most visibly angry out of the four of your boyfriends. 

“Michael.” Dwayne said more firmly this time, finally setting Laddie back down onto his feet so he could nudge the other brunette a little too harshly with his foot. Michael glared up at him only for his features to soften when he looked at both you and Laddie. “Go” He didn’t have to say much else to convince Michael. 

“Come on, let’s get you guys the hell out of here.” Michael urged, hoisting Laddie up on his back while you trailed closely behind, carefully walking over the fallen clothing racks. 

The outside of the warehouse was no better than the inside. It was a junkyard of discarded furniture, cars, and who knows what else. Thankfully though it wasn’t cold or windy like it had been the past couple of nights. Instead the humidity was starting to set in, ready for the rain that was coming. Even with the sticky heat, you couldn’t help but feel a sense of comfort now that you were outside, knowing that tonight could have had a much different outcome if the vampires had come any later. 

“I scoped the area out with Marko so there aren’t any other surfers around.” Michael reassured, probably sensing your growing fear of the possibilities. “We won’t be long okay? I promise.” Michael squeezed your shoulder gently before letting Laddie off of his back, “You two stay put.” 

It was nice seeing how much Michael had grown, how caring and protective he had become over the coven. While his relationship with the boys certainly had it’s rocky patches they eventually smoothed out. He was one of them and watching him fly back to the warehouse left you smiling for the first time since Derek had walked up to you on the boardwalk. 

You looked down at Laddie, grabbing his hands gently and sitting both of you down on the grass beneath your feet. He seemed to be fine physically, and you were sure if Michael had smelled blood on him he would have said something. 

Even then you still had to ask “He didn’t hurt you did he?” You gently moved some strands of soft hair from in front of his eyes, trying to get a better look at his face. 

“No… but he hurt you though.” He answered sadly, turning the topic back on you. 

You chuckled quietly, wincing at the pain that still radiated from your stomach “I’ll be fine. Nothing a little Neosporin won’t fix.” Laddie stuck his tongue out at the mere mention of the medical product. All too familiar with it after his countless mishaps falling off of Dwayne’s skateboard or down the cave stares after it rained. 

“Ouch.” He muttered, shaking his head before giggling quietly. You smiled at him, pushing his shoulder gently before ruffling his hair.

---

The cave felt so still. With the events that had happened tonight you weren’t very hopeful when it came to things being business as usual. It wasn’t still in a comfortable way either, it was a restless ‘who’s going to cave and ask the questions first’ suffocating stillness. David was sat smoking in his chair as per usual while the rest of the boys stared around or at you almost like they were waiting to see if you were going to fall apart. Which at this point you weren’t entirely sure if you would or not either. In a way you were surprised how quiet the boys were. No fight sparked, nobody demanded answers from you, just silence accompanied by comforting touches and loving kisses. Even Star and Michael stayed behind, planning on staying for the next few nights just in case. You knew they would be paranoid going back home and leaving Laddie behind, who refused to leave without you. 

Dwayne sat next to you, cleaning the dry blood from your face gently, while Paul clung to your other side remaining mindful of your other bodily injuries. Your hands still shook from the remaining adrenaline and your head was still pounding from the onslaught of abuse you had suffered while with Derek. He had been so insistent on getting to the boys, planning on going down any road he could just to avenge his friends. 

All in all the night had been a complete shitshow. But at least you and Laddie were safe, whether you actually felt so or not was up to you. Tonight had been enough to shake you up for a while, and you knew any other interactions with future surf Nazis would surely bring up some unwanted memories.

Paul squeezed your hand, bringing you closer to his body when Dwayne finally finished cleaning you up. All of the bloodied rags discarded to the side to be taken care of tomorrow.

“What d’you think of me and the boys spending the night in your room.” Paul asked quietly, his chin resting on your shoulder as he strategically caged you in between his legs and against his chest. “So no big bad vamp slayers can get to our girl.” He attempted to tease, but it only served to turn your stomach. 

It truly wasn’t something you had concerned yourself with, or thought anything of. Derek’s incessant visits to the record store had been short from unusual, if anything he was considered a regular right under the boy’s. But it wasn’t until tonight that you realized it was for a much deeper and sinister purpose, and it terrified you. He had talked in detail about how he had stalked you and your schedule for months, watching your every move on the boardwalk up until tonight. All of this just to get a shot at the boys, a shot he *knew* he would miss.

Plus you hated the idea of going to the boys over every little thing. You were a big girl who can handle her own business and you didn’t think it was something that concerned them. You didn’t want to rely on them for everything, that wasn’t something you ever wanted. If there was something you needed to take care of alone you were willing to do it, but with Derek’s extensive observation you had no chance of winning against him alone. 

“Hey…” Dwayne muttered, fingers brushing gently under your chin to lift your head up “This isn’t your fault. You know that right?” 

You nodded, not knowing how to respond verbally. His eyes were soft and understanding, a small smile tugging at the corners of his lips before bringing your legs over his lap and scooting closer to both you and Paul. They didn’t want to leave you alone tonight, knowing you needed all the reassurance as possible right now. Especially with so much guilt weighing on your shoulders, you felt like you were seconds away from cracking. But the closer they got the less suffocated you felt. At this moment, you felt at home.

#poly tlb #tlb 1987 #tlb imagine #tlb #dwayne the lost boys #david the lost boys #paul the lost boys #marko the lost boys #michael the lost boys #star the lost boys #The Lost Boys 1987 #the lost boys #marko #dwayne #david #paul #laddie #star #michael e #monster writes

[akatsukinojutsu]

ringing in the new year -- pain (repost)

You spend a mission with Pain scouting out the Jinchuuriki and it’s New Year’s Eve. You complain about never having a New Year’s kiss…

(not the winner of my Holiday 2020 but I just have to post more Pain as this is from my oc’s story! i’m a dirty bitch so –  NSFW content below – enjoy) (tumblr really wants to make me angry)

The night dragged on as you followed Pain in the shadows of Konohagakure. He wanted to get close to the Uzumaki boy to get some observations for himself. Because the man is who he is, he never tired or felt sluggish. You on the other hand were on your last stretch, ready to collapse in exhaustion if given the opportunity.

“Please, Pain – can we stop for a moment?” you huffed out and leaned on a tall rock. The two of you were on the outskirts of the village and the moonlight was the only thing that lit the dark woods. This moonlight reflected off of his ringed, purple eyes and it was as if they had light coming from within them.

“I suppose,” he gave a small smile then proceeded to climb on top of another tall stone and took a seat. “I believe we got enough done for the day,” he added. You shuffled towards him and crawled your way up to join him on the rock.

You placed your hand on his thigh and gave him a small smile. “You know, it’s almost New Year’s,” you paused, “As in, it is tomorrow.” Pain looked up to the stars in the sky and hummed, “I believe that you’re correct.”

Loud sounds from the village in the leaves echoed through the trees which validated the eve of the holiday was today. Soon bright, colorful streams of light shot up from behind the mountain that surrounded the village. Followed not long after the streams of lights were colors exploding in the sky in a variety of designs. Your eyes lit up in a childlike wonder as you had never seen this explosive display in your years. A wow escaped your lips as a small smile tweaked the corners of your mouth.

Pain observed your reaction over the fireworks that were continuously erupting in the horizon. They were so bright that their color shined through the trees and lit up the area around the two criminal shinobi.

With your eyes not leaving the skyline, you sighed a breath. “You know, I’ve never got one of those kisses that I’ve heard of before. The one that you’re supposed to get tonight,” your bottom lip pouted a bit and you propped your chin up with a closed fist.

The God among men pondered on your words and his body seemed to move on its own as he grabbed your wrist from under your chin; which he then proceeded to place his lips on yours. His cool lower lip piercings cause the skin on your face to tingle. You obviously were shocked by his actions but quickly fell into him. Your tongues wrestled with one another and the metal ball that pierced the muscle in his mouth clicked against your teeth.

He stopped kissing you and proceeded to pinch your cheeks with his thump and index finger. Pain pulled away with your bottom lip clenched lightly between his teeth. Warmth rushed from your head all the way to between your legs. Your appendages felt numb as the erotic feelings caused your head to swim.

“How was that?” he whispered, his warm breath burned your numbed skin. Your lips parted to speak but only a small squeak was able to voice. His lips curled to a smirk, “I take that as a compliment.”

However, the knot in your stomach did not go away once Pain removed his tongue from your mouth. It grew in intensity and you wadded the fabric of your cloak in your fingers. Your legs cross tightly as your ankles lock around each other in an ironclad lock.

It was Pain’s turn to be caught off guard because you quickly threw yourself on him. Your lips locked with his quickly and the kisses that you exchanged were desperate as well as sloppy. The two of you tumbled off the rock and slammed into the ground, Pain was beneath you and insisted that he was okay through breaks in his heavy breathing.

The orange haired shinobi took no patience in unbuttoning your cloak but instead tore the fabric away with his hands. He ripped the fabric away with ease and discarded it to the side, “Kakuzu can order a new one,” he commented as he placed his lips to your neck. His mouth formed around your supple skin and sucked which left behind bright red circles. “Just marking you – you’re mine, [Y/N].” You wiggled under his hold but his strength far surpassed yours.

Pain gripped your right thigh tightly and wrapped it around his waist. He pressed himself harshly against your pelvis and you could feel the hard member in his trousers twitch wildly. His mouth ravaged the space between your breasts as he bit and sucked. Your hands quickly made their way to his fiery mane where you tugged and ruffled his spikey locks.

Soon the clothes that you were wearing under the Akatsuki’s uniformed cloak were quickly discarded by Pain’s hands freeing them from your body. You laid on the cold ground nude and stared up to him. His purple eyes examined your body hungerly and he licked his lips as he pondered what step to take next. Pain proceeded to remove his cloak and top, his strong muscles gleamed in the moonlight as the moon’s rays shined off his sweat stained skin.

Your palms explored his chiseled form and your eyes rolled into the back of your head at the thought of how they’ll feel pressed up against your frame.

“Are you ready to feel the cock of a god?” he asked in almost a hiss. You were speechless and simply nodded your head slowly as your teeth bit into your lower lip. Pain stood up and beamed down at you, his body blocking the moonlight which casted a shadow over your body.

He loved seeing you like this – naked and just aching for him. Pain pondered if he should tease you more – watch you writhe around in bliss as he broke down your will even more by tasting your sweet. The man decided to act on this sinful thought, teasing you even more while giving you some pleasure.

Pain quickly removed his trousers and his erect member sprung the instant that it was free from its fabric trap. You took note of the black chakra rods which decorated the underside of his shaft - the entire length down to where it met his balls. There was excitement yet fear as to how they would feel being pounded into your being.

“But before we get to that, I want to taste you,” he dropped to his knees then grabbed hold of the back of yours. He threw your legs over his broad shoulders and proceeded to yank you toward him. He pulled up on your body which positioned you into an almost upside down orientation.

Pain quickly made his way to your clit and went to town on the sensitive bud. You tasted like honey to him and he wanted to be the only source of this dripping sweetness. It was as if you were struck by lightening, the sensation that his oral stimulation was doing to you left you a blubbering mess. You cried his name out, having to place your hands behind your head to keep you propped up correctly (but Pain would never let you fall). You weren’t sure if it was the blood pooling in your cranium or the cool touch of his pierced flicking tongue but you were seeing stars.

“Ugh, I’m gonna–,” you huffed out, gnawing on your tongue in frustration. Once Pain heard this, he immediately stopped. “What the fuck?” you cursed as you were angry at your orgasm denial. Your leader harshly grabbed the cheeks of your face again between his first two digits and squeezed, “You are only to cum around my cock, the cock of an all powerful god.” he held onto the syllables of the last words.

Pain drops you to the ground lightly and quickly he picks you up by your ass cheeks. He holds you tightly against his body. His member taps itself on your lower half as if it were reminding you of the pounding it will be delivering to your insides. Pain nearly slams you up against the tall rock that the two of you were perched on earlier.

He kissed you with force and proceeded to suck on your tongue. You complied but when he finally thrusted himself into you, your teeth bit down onto his tongue at the shock of it. Pain paid no attention to it as a matter of fact it actually sent ripples of erotic warmth throughout his body. He also did not give you time to adjust to his girth; he wasn’t abnormally long but it was quite wide and enough to stretch your pelvic muscles.

Instinctually, you wrapped your arms around his torso and your legs around his waist.

Pain thrust upward into your body with all his strength, the bottom of his shaft was firmly pressed against your entrance. His ringed eyes never closed nor moved from their rested fixation on your face. He watched as your expressions contorted in a variety of different emotions, ranging from ecstasy to exhaustion. The sound of his balls slapping harshly against your skin echoed through the trees and you stifled your moans and gasps. “Open your mouth,” he insisted, the man wanted to hear your full vocals. He wanted to hear you scream his name and hoped that anyone who might be around would hear it as well.

Your lips parted slightly but it wasn’t good enough for him. Pain thrusted his fingers into your mouth which caused you to gag slightly. “Suck and scream, I wanna hear it,” he huffed out between thrusts. You obeyed and sucked on the several digits that were pressed into your oral cavity. You croaked out his name in between loud gasps, “P-Pain!”

Pain could feel his climax approaching and decided that he wanted to dominate you completely before the end arrived. With his cock still fully inserted in between your slick walls, he moved you from the rock’s wall to the ground once again. You thought he wanted missionary but that was not the case. He removed himself from you and instructed you to sit on your hands and knees.

His fingers gripped onto your hair as you turned your body away from him. Your ass was now facing him and he grabbed hold of your ass cheeks. He slapped each one harshly with the same hand which caused you to coo out in lust.

Pain dug his painted nails into your flesh and yanked you toward him. He heaved himself backward and with one quick motion, thrust himself back into his cock’s new home. You called out his name and pressed yourself back on him which each pump that he delivered. With each syllable that you were able to croak out, it fueled his drive even more. You hung your head over your arms that were keeping your upper half propped up and you mouth was agape due to your heavy breathing. Pain could hear your heavy breaths and proceeded to stick the fingers of both of his hands into your mouth.

His fingers explored the area again before the index finger of each hand gripped the corners of your cheeks and pulled. Your mouth was pried open from either side and Pain used this as a sort of handle on you. He moaned your name for the first time during this whole fucking, “[Y/N]…,” he hummed as his climax came to a boil. With one final hard smack of his cock, he held himself against you with one hand still grasping your cheek and the other now around your throat.

The cum erupted from his member and coated your insides in thick ropes. You could feel the warmth from within and could feel his appendage jerk around as it spilled his load. Pain did not remove himself until he was sure that his seed was completely emptied. Once he did pull out, he spread your ass cheeks to observe the white fluid barely peeking out from your body; he was satisfied.

You collapsed onto the ground and felt your heartbeat in your throat, your chest heaved heavily as your breaths burned your chest. You had never felt such a rush of ecstasy in your life, your orgasm didn’t arrive until after Pain was finished with his. You laid there as the tingling feeling in your lower region spread out and reached your toes. Pain stuck a finger inside of your hole and wiggled it around before removing it; then placed the digit into your mouth.

“Happy New Year’s, [Y/N].”

#naruto imagines #pain imagines #pein imagines #pain x reader #naruto x reader #naruto #pain naruto #pein naruto #pein #pls tumblr be nice to me

[lavenderlucy]

Untitled 4x9 AU part 2

The plot bunny in my mind isn’t quiet finished yet. Here’s the second part to my very first piece Untitled 4x9 AU (I’m terrible at coming up with titles). This one has more angst than the last, but I will be making up for it with a third and final part coming soon. Thanks for reading!

Part 1 is here

Caroline was surprised to see a police car in Tyler’s driveway when she arrived early that morning. After spending a sleepless night battling her conflicting emotions about the night before she decided to check on Tyler before she made her way back to the cellar. She assumed he had already run from Mystic Falls after his plan to take down Klaus had failed, but she hadn’t heard anything from him since before Hayley snapped her neck in the Grille. She parked her car and got out just as the front door to the Lockwood manor opened to reveal two of her mother’s deputies leaving the house with grim expressions on their faces.

“Officer Sanders?” Caroline questioned one of them, “what’s going on?” She couldn’t help the nervousness seeping through her tone. Last night’s massacre must have already been discovered. She wondered how the Sheriff’s department was going to cover this one up. A few “animal attacks” were one thing, but 12 dead and dismembered hybrids on the Mayor’s lawn were another.

“I’m sorry, Caroline. This will be public by tomorrow, but I can’t discuss an active investigation. Tyler is inside. He can tell you.” Officer Sanders and the other deputy walked passed her and made their way to their car.

Caroline was surprised that Tyler was still in Mystic Falls. She walked through the door to the manor, worry clouding her mind. If Klaus found out Tyler was still in town there would be nothing stopping him from coming over here and killing him. She heard the sound of a sigh, Tyler’s, coming from the sitting room. As she walked down the main hall and turned to enter the room she smelled liquor and tears. She could feel the heavy feeling of grief all around her. She found Tyler sitting on a sofa with his head in one hand and a tumbler of what looked like scotch in the other.

“Tyler?” She questioned as she moved towards him. He looked wrecked. His eyes were bloodshot. His shoulders slumped. Caroline vaguely wondered if Carol was home. She made her distaste at seeing her son drink while he was technically still underage clear.

“Tyler?” She tried again. Finally he looked up at her. The broken look on his face gnawed at her heart.

“Care...” he tried to continue but a pained sob left his lips instead. Caroline flashed forward and stopped just a few inches from him.

“Tyler I’m so sorry. I tried to stop him, but I was too late. They were dead by the time I got there. I’m so so sorry.” Caroline finally felt the grief she had been putting off for the 12 hybrids. The reality of what Klaus had done was setting in. Tears threatened to spill over. For Tyler and his friends and for the friendship that had been tentatively building between her and Klaus. There’s no way she could feel anything for the man that slaughtered his own pack so willingly she thought to herself. A lie, her mind told her, but now was not the time to dwell on that.

“What are you- you don’t know, do you?” Tyler’s voice interrupted her thoughts and brought her back to the present.

“Don’t know what?” Caroline questioned. Dread suddenly filled her.

“After Klaus murdered the others he came here and he...” Tyler trailed off and a look a pure rage took over his features.

“What did he do, Tyler?” She asked afraid of the answer.

“He killed her!” Tyler shouted, standing suddenly making Caroline stumble a few steps backward. “He killed my mom to get back at me. That sick fucker came here and drowned her in the fountain.” He swallowed the remainder of his drink, the crystal tumbler still clutched in his hand.

Tyler was seething. He never had great control over the beast inside him and it was evident in the way his wolf pressed against his skin now. His eyes were gold and veins trailed from his eyes down to his cheek bones.

“What?” Any color that Caroline had in her pale features left her suddenly. She felt as though her knees would not continue to support her.

“HE KILLED HER!” Tyler screamed. The glass in his hand was suddenly shattering into pieces against the wall behind Caroline.

“I’m so sorry, Tyler. I had no idea. I tried to stop it, but Hayley got to me before I could. That bitch snapped my neck. I told you this whole thing was a bad idea. I’m so s-“ Caroline started but Tyler interrupted her before she could finish.

“Seriously, Care? You told me so? My mother and my pack are fucking dead and that’s your response?” Tyler took a step towards Caroline, his eyes still golden and enraged.

“That’s n-not what I m-meant,” Caroline stammered. “I’m so sorry, Tyler. That’s not what I meant.” Her foot was firmly in her mouth. Her tendency to say the wrong thing reared it’s ugly head.

Tears spilled down her cheeks now. She reached for Tyler to wrap him in a hug, but he stepped away from her. Caroline felt the sting of rejection.

“You should leave. I have things to handle with the police and my mother’s,” Tyler cleared his throat, “my lawyers.” His wolf receded from his face and he now looked like it was taking all of his strength just to remain standing.

“Tyler, you shouldn’t be alone. Why didn’t you call me last night? I’m here for you. Let me help,” Caroline pleaded. She stayed where she was even though all she wanted to do was wrap Tyler in her arms and comfort him. Even though their relationship had been slowly falling apart in the past few weeks, or months if she was being honest, she still cared for the boy in front of her. The boy who was now an orphan.

“Just go, Caroline. I don’t need you. I need to find Hay-.” He stopped talking and his jaw clicked shut. He looked like hadn’t meant to mention the girl that betrayed him and his friends, who had snapped his supposed girlfriend’s neck.

“Hayley? You need to find Hayley?” Caroline’s voice became louder and full of anger. “That backstabbing bitch sold you and your pack out to Klaus. I found out last night right before she snapped my neck and left me on the floor of the bathroom in the Grille. I was trying to stop her and save you all, Tyler. Klaus wouldn’t have had an advantage had she not run to him and told him the whole plan. Maybe he wouldn’t have killed them if we tired to reason with him. He probably felt cornered so he lashed out.” Caroline knew mentioning Klaus right now was a terrible idea, but Tyler had to realize that Hayley betrayed him.

“So now you’re defending Klaus?” Tyler’s anger returned in full force. “That’s really nice, Caroline. You’re defending the bastard that killed my pack and my mother not even a full day ago.” Tyler’s eyes started to bleed gold.

“I’m not defending him! Hayley betrayed you. This whole mess is her fault! I saw Klaus last night and-“ She wasn’t able to finish her sentence before Tyler flashed in front of her, his face just inches from hers.

“You saw him last night?” His voice was quiet and accusatory. Caroline could feel his anger radiating from his body.

“Yes. I was looking for you,” she began evenly, hoping to calm him down. “I was worried about you. I found him out in the cellar. We only talked for a couple of minutes and then he left.”

“Let me guess, you batted your eyes and he let you go,” Tyler sneered. “Typical Caroline, flirting with monsters to make herself feel better.” The look he was giving her was one of pure disgust.

“No! I mean yes, he left without hurting me, but I didn’t bat anything at him, Tyler, and I certainly didn’t flirt with him!” Caroline was becoming annoyed. Tyler was grieving, but that wasn’t an excuse to speak to her that way.

Tyler and Caroline were silent for several long moments. Their annoyance with each other hung between them. Caroline’s thoughts drifted to Klaus without her permission. He had let her go last night. He could have killed her in a second with no effort and he had let her live. He had been so gentle when he pressed his lips to her mouth and cheek, like he was scared she might break. It was hard for Caroline to reconcile the broken man last night with the man who murdered Tyler’s mother just minutes after nearly kissing her. Klaus was a monster, yes, but weren’t they all? Hadn’t they all killed to protect themselves or their loved ones? Hell, hadn’t they all killed for no reason at all other than they lost control? How many times did Tyler expect he could provoke Klaus before he lashed out?

“Tyler...” Caroline didn’t know what to say to him. She wiped her tears from her face with the back of her hand and took a breath to ground herself.

“Go, Caroline. Just go. Please.” Tyler looked like he was going break down. Caroline had barely taken a half step toward him when his eyes flashed yellow and his fangs emerged from his gums.

“GO!” He shouted.

Caroline knew in that moment that they were over. He would rather look for the bitch that had sold out his pack and almost gotten him killed instead of be in the same room as her. She knew it was selfish to think this way when his grief was still fresh, but she didn’t care. Her fear that he had been cheating on her didn’t seem so far fetched after all. Their show at the pageant just a short while ago didn’t seem so much like a ruse now. Tyler clearly had feelings for Hayley if he still wanted to find her after all of this. She met his eyes and tried to convey something, anything to make him see she wasn’t the bad guy here. His glare was still full of rage so she turned and flashed out of the house.

Once she was in her car Caroline felt anger rush through her. How dare Tyler choose the girl that betrayed him and his friends over her? How dare he accuse her of flirting with Klaus? How dare he dismiss her? Caroline needed an outlet for her anger. She knew she would get nowhere with Tyler today so her mind settled on Klaus. How dare Klaus make her care for him despite everything that he is and then murder his hybrids? How dare he give her jewelry and romantic drawings and then drown Tyler’s mother? Caroline’s anger quickly turned to rage and she sped out of Tyler’s driveway toward the Mikaelson mansion.

Her car was barely in park before she whipped open her door and stalked up to Klaus’s front door, her blonde curls bouncing with each step.

“Klaus!” She shouted while banging her fist on the door. After a minute with no answer she banged louder. “Come out here you unbelievable bastard!” She was about to start yelling louder when the door was suddenly ripped open and an enraged looking Klaus stood in the doorway, eyes flashing gold. The sleeves of his dark gray henley were pushed up to his elbows and Caroline could see small flecks of paint on his hands. Klaus opened his mouth to growl something at her, but Caroline beat him to it.

“How could you? How could you be such a monster?” She shouted, her hands shaking with rage, as she took a step up towards him.

Klaus’s eyes narrowed and he stepped out of the doorway to meet her on the top step of his porch.

“How could I?” He gritted out between clenched teeth. “How could I kill the mutts that Lockwood and his little friend unsired and turned against me? HOW COULD I?” He raised his voice louder until he was shouting at Caroline.

Caroline opened her mouth to speak again, but this time Klaus interrupted her.

“Or are you talking about his mother? She was a fighter you know. She fought until her very last second, desperate for air.” He taunted with a wicked smirk on his lips, eyes sharp. Caroline gasped, shocked at the way he spoke so casually about killing Carol.

“He took EVERYTHING from me,” Klaus spat. “It’s only fair I finally take something from him. You lot have been trying to kill me since I returned to this infernal town and now you’re shocked that I exacted my revenge. You called me a monster, love. This is what monsters do.”

“Carol was innocent! She didn’t deserve to be a part of your twisted game! God, I don’t know why I ever gave you even a second of my time. You’re clearly not worth it!” Caroline shouted back at him. Had she been in a more rational state of mind she would have been almost afraid to shout at the man who just murdered 13 people, but her heightened emotions clouded her judgement.

Klaus’s features turned darker and before Caroline could blink he pulled her across the threshold by her upper arms and slammed her against the wall of his lavish foyer, the plaster cracking around her. The breath left Caroline’s lungs and her eyes widened as she took in his golden eyes and double fangs. She realized how stupid she had been to come here and pick a fight with Klaus. She let out a pained cry as she felt her ribs and spine protest. She was pretty sure something was fractured at the very least. Klaus grip loosened infinitesimally until he saw tears form in her blue eyes, threatening to spill over her cheeks.

Klaus removed his hands from Caroline’s arms and took several steps back from her. Something that looked almost like regret for his rough treatment of her flashed across his face. Caroline slid slightly down the wall before she locked her knees and caught herself. There was no way she was going to give Klaus the satisfaction of seeing her fall.

A moment passed and Klaus slowly moved forward with a grace that only came with age until he was close enough to touch her. He slowly lifted his hands so he didn’t frighten her and once more gripped her upper arms. Instead of bruising his touch was soft yet firm. He helped Caroline to stand up straight and held her there while her bones fused themselves back together. A single tear escaped and made its way down her face. Before it could reach her jaw Klaus moved one hand to cradle the side her face and brushed the tear away with his thumb. Caroline moved her free arm and grasped Klaus’s wrist with hesitant fingers. She hadn’t meant to touch him, but her body acted on its own accord. She could feel his slow pulse and his warm skin beneath her fingers. She could smell the blood running through his veins. The two of them stood there unmoving and staring at each other for several long minutes. Regret clouded Klaus’s face. Caroline wondered how many times in his long life he’d ever been sorry for anything he’d done.

“Not many,” Klaus answered softly, “but I find myself making exceptions for you, Caroline.”

Caroline realized she’d spoken out loud and blushed slightly. Klaus moved his thumb over the light pink on her cheek, looking as though he was fascinated by the color. She knew she shouldn’t be so comfortable in Klaus’s embrace, especially after she had seen Tyler’s grief stricken face earlier. She shouldn’t be so comfortable with a murderer’s touch, but she couldn’t bring herself to move. Something in Klaus’s touch ignited something in her that she had never felt before. A feeling of completeness. A feeling that someone truly cared for her. A feeling that she was finally enough.

#klaroline fanfiction #klaroline drabbles #klaroline