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#i'd never do anything like that even to someone i truly hate
felizusnavidad · 1 month
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oooh the fact that the haters are congregated on twitter makes me extra mad knowing that lin used to interact so often with people there :(
i think this is one of the reasons he left. i also read somewhere that people were making fun of him on twitter right after one of his family members died & if this is actually true it tells me everything i need to know about this community.
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undiscovered-horizon · 6 months
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[It’s considered good etiquette to ask a man about his wife’s wellbeing. Except if the man in question is Dracule Mihawk.]
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Garp hates having to call Mihawk, mainly because of the warlord's attitude. Used to the usual "yes, sir!" of the Marines, a man with his own will and agenda is not something he entirely knows how to navigate. Especially since both of them know that the World Government needs the warlords more than they need the bureaucracy. And that doesn't exactly help in exercising power.
His attempts at diplomacy have burst into flames each time and today isn't going to be much different:
"How’s the missus?" Garp asks in the nicest tone he can force although he's aware that Mihawk knows how much the vice admiral hates asking for Dracule's assistance.
Mihawk only scoffs. "Are you calling just to spoil my mood or is there another reason for your impertinence?"
"I was just trying to-"
"Don't," he cuts him off in a stern voice. "If you have business with me, speak fast. If you're interested in my wife, I know where you live, Garp. I'd suggest losing your unwelcome nosiness before you lose something else."
Little did Garp know at the time but his little question was possibly the worst strategy he could think of. Dracule Mihawk is not like most men and the mere mention of his wife by acquaintances only enrages him. Work and private life do not ever mix. And he'll be damned if someone tries to breach that, even in the form of a courtesy. Therefore, the rest of the call was filled with openly insulting answers that were bold even for Mihawk. A veiled threat or two also found their way into their rather tense conversation.
You know he's done with Garp when he lets out a frustrated grunt. Sometimes you wonder if this grumpy, forever dissatisfied version of him is the only side of Mihawk his acquaintances know. Maybe he really is two men in the form of one.
He's sitting at his desk, thinking about something and not bothering to get up for now. Considering the fact that his hat is lying on the table and not on his head, Mihawk is probably not planning on going out anytime soon. Then again, judging by his spoiled mood, his homestay is a blessing for the first poor sods that would cross his path.
In slow steps, you stroll to his side, letting your hand brush through his hair. He doesn't say anything, only leans his head further towards you. The thing about Mihawk is that he loved to reject and decline but he never does so to you. No, in your case it's the opposite - he revels in allowing you whatever you want.
So intimidating and combative, yet soft and looking for intimacy. Truly, two men with the face of one.
"My mother used to say that each grey hair is one thing we worry about," you say quietly. "At this rate, love, your whole head will be white by noon."
"Your mother also says that milk goes sour because gnomes piss in it," he retorts. Yes, your mother and her strange folk beliefs... She's probably the only person Mihawk can force himself to be nice to despite his dislike.
His response earns a hearty laugh from you. Clear as day, you can see his posture relax as he listens to the music of your happiness. If he even thinks about the possibility of Garp or any other of his acquaintances hearing it, he might just get furious again.
"Well, nobody's perfect," you say between chuckles.
Then, Mihawk gently grabs your hand and lowers it to his face. With softness and passion that hardly befits a man of his infamy, he kisses the inside of your hand. "You seem to be doing so effortlessly."
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berrymeter · 2 years
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i’m. i feel horrible rn but. i’m so very lucky to have energy as a friend i will say that
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mondaymelon · 3 months
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₊⊹ 𝐛𝐞 𝐦𝐲 𝐯𝐚𝐥𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐞! | genshin males x gn!reader
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「 "𝐡𝐞𝐲, 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭'𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐟𝐚𝐢𝐫!"」
— in which you give him chocolates before he attempts to give you his??
— fluff. highschool!au but built like a shoujo manga lmao ... happy valentine's day ~ ♡ another fic will be going out tomorrow :)
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THOMA, albedo, ayato, alhaitham, childe, KAVEH, HEIZOU, VENTI, GAMING, CHONGYUN, KAZUHA, wriothesley, tighnari, freminet, lyney ♡
Calling yourself a "romantic" person would be quite a stretch.
Saying Valentine's was your favorite day of the year would be even worse.
Sure, sure, you'd heard plenty of things, from the nagging old man manning the grocery store, always red in the face from regular swigs of cheap liquor, or the seemingly never endless musings from your classmates, swooning and fainting every moment anyone, or more specifically, the leads starring in those dramas of theirs, did anything remotely affectionate.
Young, innocent love, while a splendid thing, for someone like you, your really only option was to endlessly pine after someone who would certainly not return your affections.
The recipient of such foolish affections? That much was obvious. What a rather hopeless person, you were.
At the very least, he seemed to enjoy your presence. A smile would adorn his lips, and he'd always meet your gaze with his familiar greeting of, "Good morning, did you sleep well?"
Fuck, you hated how such a simple line, questioning of your wellbeing, could tug at your heartstrings so effortlessly. The man was playing you like a fiddle, and a part of you didn't try to resist that.
So the moment February 14th rolled itself around, bearing promises of youthful laughter, baby cupids, hearts, and sweets, you tried not to pay heed to the extra weight of chocolates in your school bag.
Had you stayed up late making them just the right sweetness, making sure they were perfectly heart-shaped?
Yes. As stated previously, you were truly hopeless.
"Ah, good morning." Wow, look at you, taking the initiative to greet someone? Truly, a day of magic and wonder! You're almost jump scared at the sight of him in your classroom, just what the fuck was he doing here? He leaned against the doorway, looking terribly pretty in the morning lighting.
This was not doing wonders to your heart.
Upon seeing you, he straightened his posture, looking suspiciously sheepish with an extra non-characteristic, flusteredness on his features. "You're here early today."
"It's Valentine's." That's all you managed to sputter out with that tied tongue of yours.
"Yes, and?" He raised an eyebrow questioningly, not entirely convinced, and followed you to your seat like some sort of lost puppy.
Your brain raced to find a rationale he'd deem reasonable. "Uhm, ah... my friend... is planning to confess to a guy, so I had to come early and help her... set up the place she's planning to do so at?"
"I see... ah," His eyes lit up like he had thought of something. "Are you free after school? We should meet up afterward, so you can tell me how it went...?"
"Yes!" You responded a little too quickly, and cussing yourself out in you head, you corrected it. "Ahem- yes, I'd like that." The burning feeling that arose on your face was starting to become too prominent to ignore.
He didn't seem to pay it any mind, and instead beamed in a close-eyed smile. "Perfect. Then, I'll see you?" You were to bid him goodbye, but he ran off before you could even utter a sound, leaving you rather dumbfounded, blank-faced and still feeling the tingling warmth on your cheeks.
Holy shit, is this my chance?? You’d made chocolates on the eensiest, weensiest off chance that you might grow bold enough to hand it to him, even if under the pretense of “as friends”, but with the violent way your heart was pounding in your chest, you didn’t think avoidance would be an option.
Ahaha, you were making a mistake, weren’t you?
Only one way to find out.
The rest of the day went by as predicted. Fanatic screams and a wave of crazed people chasing after the more popular figures of the school, throwing boxes of chocolates and bouquets of roses... hey, wasn't this a safety hazard? There were other screams too - but not of excitement, but terror as a man was crushed and trampled under a wave of love-sick girls chasing after the popular boy in class 2-A.
You just hoped that he wouldn't sue the school. The place was already cutting enough corners when it came to the monstrosity of cafeteria food.
The bell rang, signaling your freedom, and you massaged your shoulders with a sigh. You'd survived, somehow. As you stepped out the door, a ding from your phone alerted you with a text, and as you lit up the screen, the corner of your lips unconsciously turned upwards into a soft smile.
hot guy <3 - don't forget.
hot guy <3 - ill be waiting for you
Stepping into his classroom, you scanned your surroundings for the familiar sight of the man. Low and behold, there he was, sat upon, presumably, his desk, and staring out the window like some main character. You walked over, trying your best to disregard the clamminess of your fingers - or more specifically, the hand that was holding your homemade chocolates hidden safely(?) away behind your back. His features brightened at the sight of you, and he swung his legs, ushering you over to share the view with him.
"Sorry, did you wait long?" You sheepishly grinned as he scooted to the side to give you space to sit down next to him. As you did so, you were made painfully aware of how his body was still pressed up against yours. “I almost got trampled on my way here, not a pretty sight.”
“...Pretty sight?” He echoed his words, tilting his head as he pondered, the slightest curve of a smile tugging at his lips. “You?”
“W-What? No, I-” You cleared your throat before he could say another word, trying to dispel the blush on your features. Naturally, you failed to do so. “What kind of things are you saying now? Just who’d you learn that from?”
“Haa? What do you mean, learned? I just said the truth, that’s all…”
God, he was so adorable. This man had definitely run off with your heart.
Now or never, you supposed. Standing upwards abruptly, you pulled out the heart-shaped box of chocolates you’d been hiding behind your back the entire time, visibly trembling as you held it outwards.
“Will you be my valentine?”
It took him the count of three to respond, his eyes round and doe-like. He blinked rapidly, and then his cheeks flushed - not with his usual cheeriness, but a red that definitely spoke of flusteredness. “H-Hey, that's no fair…”
“...What?” Damn, was this your rejection? You had expected as much, but-
“I was supposed to give you chocolates first, y’know…”
And just like that, the familiar boy before you reached beside him into the darkly lit space and pulled out his own box of chocolates, lightly colored and wrapped beautifully in shimmering golden ribbon. “It took me so long to do this, and yet…”
“Holyfuckingshitwhat.” The curses flew from your mouth, condensed into a single word. “W- H- Y-You… You got chocolates for me?”
Now this was a first. Seeing his cheeks and tips of his ears all rosy, and seeing him all kicked-puppy-like. He nodded slowly, “Mhm… But, this is good too!”
He likes me.
He likes me.
He likes me.
Hoooooly shit.
“Ah, oh no, I didn’t give you an answer, did I?” His usually soft eyes now filled with panic. “Don't tell me I'm too late, I’ll be your valentine!”
The chocolates, surely, would be sweet. But the sensation of your lips meeting his, the undeniable warmth he bestowed upon you — it was sweeter than anything. ♡
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(a/n) lmao guess what. i got sick again. i was sick last month and i mfucking sick and dying again and the only thing saving me is shitty couhg medicine that doesn't even work and like expired coughdrops my couhgdrop supply is running low and oh god i don't THINK IM GOINNA MAKE IT-
hahah anyways remember when i said id come back. well . guess what. ive been working on original works for a while now, but the delulu has indeed returned ( for longer than a week this time, hopefully )
i did work on some stuff during my inactivity! the post will probably be out tomorrow, but please don't be upset if i push the date back :)
anyways whipped up this quick drabble so all of you could be well fed on valentines. remember that its okay to be single on this day, and that there are plenty of other people out there like you. there is no shame in being single, and i love every one of you ! mwah <33
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໒꒱ || ᴛᴀɢʟɪꜱᴛ (open! send an ask or a comment ♡) : @manager-of-the-pudding-bank, @iamdedinside, @ilyuu, @achlysis, @swivy123, @scara-is-my-wife, @lupicalbestwolf, @justyoureader, @fiannee, @aether-darling, @solxima, @sangoqueenkoko, @haliyamori
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mypoisonedvine · 4 months
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100 random dialogue prompts
truly random, there's a mix of angsty and smutty and fluffy in here. as a result it's nsfw and 18+ :)
"who did this to you?"
"where are you going dressed like that?"
"this isn't enough anymore. I need more of you-- all of you."
"I'm not angry, I just get tired of watching you get hurt."
"don't say stuff like that, it gets me all... confused."
"just lie to me, okay? just this once."
"I never said I didn't feel the same way."
"you should go... before someone sees."
"I hate how you make it impossible to hate you."
"too good for you? don't be ridiculous-- they don't deserve you."
"fuck, do that again... please."
"you promise you're going to behave this time?"
"oh please, you knew what you were doing... you wanted to drive me crazy."
"no, it's not over. it's never over."
"so you're saying even if we were the last people on Earth--?" "nope."
"sooo... is everything supposed to just go back to normal after that?"
"you can't ignore me. not anymore."
"it's not what it looks like!" "is that a picture of me?!"
"you really didn't notice that I was falling in love with you?"
"is this really the last time?"
"I'm sorry, I swear I tried, but I just can't get over you."
"do you really think that toy can replace me?"
"don't tell me how to feel."
"forgive me, but I'm not feeling very patient right now."
"you could do so much better than me."
"what would they think if they saw you right now?"
"I didn't know you could be so obedient."
"you can take it."
"you were never my fallback-- I always wanted you."
"yeah, I want to, but... wouldn't it be weird?"
"don't act like you never thought about it before."
"I wish they could all know about us."
"you're the best mistake I ever made."
"no, I don't hate you... I'm angry, but I don't think I could ever really hate you."
"let's just stop now before anybody's feelings get hurt."
"don't get my hopes up if you're just gonna leave like everyone else."
"I can't let it end like this."
"if you do what you're told, you'll get a reward."
"what's gotten into you? you're being so... naughty."
"I think we're on a first name basis by now."
"don't do that... don't act like you don't feel this too."
"it was never just sex."
"I wish I'd met you sooner."
"you can tell me anything."
"why do we have to get out of bed again?"
"I think this is my favorite way to wake up."
"I was already yours."
"there's no way that was just a one-night thing."
"if you can look me in the eye and tell me you want me to go, I'll go."
"has anybody else ever made you feel like this?"
"it feels like we were made for each other."
"I just wanted to say I'm sorry, and I miss you."
"I have an idea to make them jealous."
"just one more kiss?"
"do you really expect me to believe this is what you want?"
"if you say you're happy with them, I'll believe you. or at least I'll try to."
"I can think of a more fun way you can thank me."
"no, I'm in charge tonight, remember?"
"if you keep doing that, this might end a little too soon."
"hey, you lost the bet, fair and square."
"stop imagining it!" "I'm sorry, but I can't get it out of my head!"
"it's too bad we never did. we would've been great together."
"I never thought I'd hear you talk like that."
"oh, fuck me--" "okay." "what? it's just a figure of speech..."
"were you joking? I wasn't joking."
"admit it: you had a crush on me!"
"I just need you to hold me right now."
"friends can cuddle, right?"
"I wouldn't have picked this for movie night if I'd known it had so many sex scenes..."
"they're great but... they're not you."
"I always thought it would be me and you in the end."
"you're not actually trying to convince me that was a friendly kiss, are you?"
"if you hate me so much, how come you keep coming back?"
"do you remember getting drunk and calling me last night?"
"I'm free tonight if you still need a date for that thing you're going to."
"I'd do anything for you."
"I think I finally get what all those love songs are about."
"it's weird being here again... so many memories."
"I wish you'd give me a chance."
"I never meant to hurt you."
"just come to dinner with me. it doesn't have to be weird."
"seeing you with them made me realize you should be with me."
"just ask yourself for once: what do you want?"
"okay, okay, I'll leave-- as soon as I can find my pants."
"we need to be more careful next time."
"wait, why are you in my bed? did we...?"
"I took you for granted, I know. but I want to treat you right this time."
"kiss me like you mean it."
"keep the lights on, I want to see you."
"is it just me, or does your celebrity crush look a lot like me?"
"we promised we wouldn't let this affect our friendship."
"no, don't cry-- if you start crying, I'll start crying!"
"I want to see my marks on you tomorrow."
"don't act innocent, it's not going to work with me."
"is this really turning you on? I'm not even doing anything."
"come look at the stars with me."
"I lov--" "no, don't say anything. you'll kill the moment."
"what happens next in your fantasy?"
"I probably shouldn't tell you this but... you were in my dream last night."
"why do you still wear the hoodie I left at your place?"
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buckybabesonly · 1 year
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Heart of Glass
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Summary: You hate it when Bucky is mad, but it's a thousand times worse when you're the one he's mad at.
Pairing: Bucky x female!Reader
Genre: Angst, fluff
Warnings: Insecure reader, self-deprecation, self-harm (?)
A/N: I love stories like these so thought I'd take a stab at it. Please do leave feedback, they are always encouraging!
Length: 4.8k
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It had taken Bucky a long time to open up to you. His journey of being able to face what he had done as the Winter Soldier was long and arduous, and still ongoing. He had vivid nightmares, ones which alleviated in frequency over the course of the last few years, but which still sometimes made an unwelcome appearance.
His own healing was a work in progress, so it was no surprise that it was still a struggle for him to divulge certain aspects to you. He found it difficult letting himself be vulnerable, even around people he trusted, and insight into his past had been offered to you in scattered pieces.
You had been patient, although you wished that Bucky would feel comfortable revealing more. You never judged him, and you just wanted to help and do your part in the recovery process, if you could. It was much worse hearing the exacerbated, hateful stories of the Winter Soldier from other people’s mouths - the Internet was a horrid place, and whilst there were still a lot of people who supported Bucky Barnes and the Avengers in general, there were just as many people who would not forgive him for being the Winter Soldier.
You knew that you shouldn’t have done what you did. You and Bucky had been together for just over a year, friends for three times that long. It hadn’t all been flowers and rainbows - it had been a tumultuous relationship and you had had your ups and downs, but at the end of the day, you knew you had found your person. You were both learning and growing together, navigating the tougher obstacles in your relationship with enthusiasm. You had finally found someone you were truly madly in love with, and you felt so lucky.
It wasn’t easy, working for S.H.I.E.L.D as an agent which was a demanding career in itself, and dating someone who was almost in constant danger and carrying out often life-threatening missions. But you made it work. Getting to love Bucky and have him love you back was worth anything, and you loved being able to see him smile and, what’s more, being his reason to smile.
On the same token, you hated seeing him unhappy. It was the most devastating feeling in the world, in times when he was disappointed in himself, or when he had woken up from a particularly bad nightmare, or after one of his mandated therapy sessions. 
The worst thing was seeing him mad. And it’s a thousand times worse when you’re the one he’s mad at.
You knew that you shouldn’t have done it. You felt guilty as you passed your colleagues desk and your eyes naturally flickered to a familiar name in recognition. BARNES, JAMES BUCHANAN.
You frowned slightly, realizing that his file was on a pile alongside a couple of other familiar names. It wasn’t unusual for another agent to have his file out, particularly if he was looking into specific incidents that Bucky may have been involved in the past, but you had never actually seen it in front of you before.
Of course, it would have been easy for you to find the file and look for yourself. Everything had electronic copies these days, or you could have grabbed the physical copies from the archive. But you had never done it, as it just didn’t feel right. Reading up on your boyfriend’s past like his life was a history book.
Still, despite yourself, you paused. You found your hand reaching out and you took a deep breath of momentary hesitation before you flicked open the file. 
An assortment of photos and documents were stacked neatly inside. You couldn’t help it as you found your eyes consuming the information, flicking from page to page. The guilt was building in your gut the longer you spent, standing slightly crouched over the desk, consuming the information with an uncomfortable lump in your throat.
You wanted to cry. You felt your hate for HYDRA increase ten-fold, thinking about all the pain they inflicted on Bucky to manipulate him into their own personal killing machine, thinking about how they had simply made him hurt all those people. Bucky often had the most stoic, cool exterior, but you knew inside he was just your soft, gentle boyfriend. The most beautiful man you knew had been forced to be an assassin against his will.
And now he had to live with the consequences. It’s so unfair, you thought as tears of anger pricked your eyes. You were a very empathetic person, especially when it came to him, and you found yourself feeling quietly furious.
You slammed the file shut, conflicted emotions making you feel both angry and guilty. You always had an idea of what HYDRA had made Bucky do, of course, but actually consuming the detail within his file had made it come to life in your mind. All you wanted during the course of your time with Bucky was to get a better view from his shoes, if only to help you relate a bit more to his suffering. You loved him so much and you wanted nothing more than to help him.
At the same time, you knew it wasn’t right, snooping like this. You always told yourself to just wait, and eventually Bucky would trust you enough to share everything. 
You started to wonder if you had done something wrong as you slowly walked away from the desk, nibbling your bottom lip. You cleared your throat uncomfortably, frowning as the contents of the file plagued your mind. You decided you would have to come clean to Bucky about this.
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“What?” Bucky said quietly, cocking his head to the side as if he really had genuinely misheard you. However, as you studied the look in his eyes, you knew that he had heard every word.
“I know it was wrong. Bucky, I’m - “
“If you knew it was wrong, then why did you do it?” Bucky interrupted, his eyebrows drawing together as he frowned. Anger was starting to distort his face, and he kept his voice quiet and low.
You were mute for a long minute, your cheeks flushing as he stared at you, waiting for you to speak. You were both stood in your bedroom, you with your back against the window and his against the door. The distance between you felt painful.
“Do you know what a violation of my privacy that is?” he continued when you didn’t speak, his jaw twitching.
“I was just trying to - just trying to understand,” you said, trying to find the right words. “I just thought that if I knew what they did to you, then I could help you.”
“How would you be able to help?” Bucky was furious, but in that quiet, almost calm way that frightened you the most. His brow was slightly furrowed, corners of lips turned down into a frown, but the biggest giveaway was his clenched fists. They were shaking almost impercetibly.
It was scarier when he didn’t raise his voice, and your fingers twitched uncomfortably by your sides, wanting to reach out to him.
“I don’t know,” you whispered. “I thought that if I could understand what happened, then maybe I could help with your nightmares, help talk to you about the past.”
Bucky exhaled loudly, shaking his head. “Are you my therapist? What were you hoping to do, read my entire past and diagnose me?” He regarded you with a look of bewilderment and fury.
“No, I - “
“No, listen,” Bucky said, frustration rising in his throat, breaking his barely composed facade. “Do you have any idea how messed up that is? There’s a reason why I didn’t tell you everything at my own pace, and you went behind my back and fucking investigated me? How do you think that makes me feel? You couldn’t even respect me enough to let me tell you out of my own choice!”
You opened your mouth, but no words came out. You knew you had fucked up majorly. He was glaring at you, waiting for you to say something.
“I’m so sorry, Buck. I really didn’t have any bad intentions, I just - “
“It doesn’t matter,” Bucky spat out. “It doesn’t matter that you didn’t have any bad intentions. You think I’m proud of what I did as the fucking Winter Soldier? It haunts me, and I have to live with him for the rest of my fucking life. I - I trusted you, and you betrayed it.”
I let out a slight whimper at his words, knowing the venomous words he was spitting out was completely true. 
“I have to fight so hard, every day, not to fall apart with the knowledge and memories of what the Winter Soldier did, what I did.” 
“Bucky, please,” you said, taking a step forward, tears pricking your eyes. “I’m so sorry. I know I shouldn’t have done that, I am so, so sorry.”
Bucky shook his head, moving away from me and lifting his hands as a warning. “Don’t. Just - don’t.”
He turned his back, making to leave. 
“Can we just talk about this?” you asked desperately, not wanting him to go. You were terrified that he wouldn’t come back.
“I need some space,” Bucky said sharply without turning to look back at you. He left and pulled the door shut with such force that you jumped, tears finally escaping.
You had no idea how you were going to fix this.
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Bucky and you had one rule. Never go to bed angry at each other.
It was a rule you had instigated. You hated going to bed whilst you were in the throes of a fight, and the first time you had argued - something petty, really - you had pouted at Bucky and demanded that you make up. 
He was relieved at that time as it was such a silly fight and he was anxious that you would give him the silent treatment. But he laughed as you jumped into his arms, kissing his cheek and letting him know all was forgiven.
“New rule - we can’t go to bed angry at each other,” you had announced at the time.
“Yes, my liege,” Bucky had responded.
Bucky wasn’t answering your calls or texts. You left 15 voicemails and 24 text messages, all apologizing and asking him to talk. You knew you should give him space, as it was only fair for him to digest what had happened and process, but you felt like you couldn’t function.
You wanted him by your side so you could apologize over and over again and tell him, genuinely, how regretful you were.
There was no excuse. Your face was tear-stained and eyes puffy as you paced your apartment, the clock having struck midnight a long time ago, with no sight of Bucky.
When four AM rolled round, you finally passed out on the couch whilst waiting for him. When your alarm rudely woke you up at seven, you startled and immediately ran into the bedroom, although you knew he wouldn’t be there.
The bed was empty, still made from the previous morning and untouched.
You could cry all over again.
You hurried to get ready nonetheless, and made your way to the Avengers Tower. You were involved in some S.H.I.E.L.D projects that were being hosted there, and you knew it was the place Bucky was most likely to be.
You checked your phone obsessively on the way to the Tower. No calls or messages from Bucky.
You groaned internally. He had never ignored you like this before. The gravity of the situation was slowly growing heavier and heavier - he was your Bucky, the one who always took care of you and worried over you and was by your side almost 24/7 whenever he wasn’t out on a mission, but now he was actively avoiding you. 
More and more fear started to creep into the mix alongside the guilt. Would Bucky leave you over this?
When you arrived at the Tower, you expected it to be a lot harder to find him than it was. But he was in the training room, the first place you looked.
“Bucky,” you said quietly as soon as you saw him. He was serving blows mercilessly to a punching bag hung from the ceiling, as if he needed the practice. You knew he was letting off steam. He was dressed in a t-shirt and sweatpants, his hair hanging over his forehead in sweaty tendrils, his face slightly red. 
Bucky barely even flinched. He didn’t acknowledge you at all, eyes never leaving the bag in front of him.
“Can we talk?” you asked tentatively. 
No response.
“Bucky, if you don’t reply, I’m just going to start talking at you, and I really don’t want to do that,” you said. All you wanted him to do was at least look at you.
Bucky stopped then and you heaved a sigh of relief. But instead of speaking, he simply wrapped a towel around his shoulders and turned his back on you, leaving out of the door on the other side of the room.
You felt rocks fall to the bottom of your stomach, and the urge to cry reared its ugly head yet again.
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Bucky hadn’t spoken to you for two days. He hadn’t returned to your apartment for two days.
You had cried all of those days. You tried to find him and corner him to make him face you, but after that day in the training room, he had really been avoiding you. You had only seen him once in those two days, and he immediately disappeared as soon as he saw you.
It hurt so much. Like someone had stabbed you and, what’s more, was twisting the handle. 
You knew you deserved it. You had really hurt Bucky, but part of you was still terrified of what he would do. How long would he wait until he decided to speak to you again? Was he going to break up with you?
You didn’t know how to fix it. You were ashamed to tell Sam, even though you wanted to ask his advice on what to do. You had done something so bad that you didn’t want to face his disappointment, too, although you were certain Bucky may have already told him.
Still, it hurt so bad. All you wanted Bucky to do was hug you and tell you it was alright, instead you were met with indifference and the back of his head. He wouldn’t even look at you. 
You would rather he shouted at you, screamed at you, anything to actually make him talk and acknowledge your existence. But he continued to ice you out, and your heart was breaking.
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Bucky knew he loved you even before you officially became a couple. He loved how funny you were, how hard working you were, how you always listened to his side of the story, how you took care of him and patiently explained anything to him that he still didn’t quite understand about the modern world.
There were a lot of great women, but to Bucky, you had stood out. From day one, you had cared about him. Little things, like asking about his favorite songs from the 40s, making sure his head was covered with your umbrella when it was raining even though your shoulder was getting wet, ensuring he got three solid meals a day and that his favorite snacks were stored in the pantry.
Bigger things, too, like letting him share the burden of his past with you without ever a word of judgment or disdain, encouraging him to visit his parents’ grave on the anniversary of their death and making the journey with him, sharing memories of Steve whenever Bucky was missing him. You were his rock, and he felt like he had mined the most precious diamond.
He knew he could tell you anything, but his sordid past as the Winter Soldier was still something he was trying to overcome himself. He was ashamed, and part of him was worried that you would suddenly think less of him. See him as the monster that he used to be, the monster that he sometimes saw himself as.
He hated the thought of poisoning your mind with unsavory images of himself and the knowledge of what he had done.
He was so angry to know that you saw his file. But the majority of his feelings came from the fact that he was so laden with guilt. He didn’t want you to know the ugly truth when all you had seen of him so far was the better version of himself that he was trying to be.
How could he forget his past when you knew every disgusting detail now, too? When you had now also seen the faces of all the people he had killed?
At the same time, he believed you when you said you were just trying to help. That was just your nature. He knew that you genuinely thought if you understood, you could offer assistance and ease his silent torment.
But anger prevailed, and he found himself ignoring you for days, even though he felt so immature doing it. He just couldn’t face you right now, even as you stared at him with wide, hopeful eyes. He could barely avoid meeting your gaze and instead chose to turn away completely, as if pretending you weren’t there would alleviate the pain. He was afraid that if he looked at you a little too long, his resolve would shatter.
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It was exceptionally poor timing that your birthday rolled around after five days of total radio silence from Bucky. You had forgotten, actually, until you entered the Tower and a fellow agent had wished you a happy birthday. 
You gave her a weak smile as you muttered some made up plans about how you would be celebrating. 
You wanted to burst out crying when you saw Bucky that morning, in the kitchen at the Tower.
He was leaning against the kitchen island, a smile on his face, a smile you hadn’t seen for almost a week. He was talking to an agent, a decent girl you had worked with before. You liked her, actually, as did a lot of people. He was talking to her about something, looking more relaxed than you had seen him since you had the fight.
He hadn’t noticed you as you observed the two of them. You didn’t think anything flirtatious was going on, but still, it hurt to see him smiling softly at someone else when he hadn’t paid you any attention for so long.
Part of you wasn’t sure if Bucky was going to speak to you today. But it was your birthday, after all - he always made a big deal out of it, asking you what you wanted to do and making sure you got a cake and flowers and all the romantic works. He always told you that you were his greatest gift, and so he couldn’t miss celebrating the day that you were brought into the world.
If he didn’t speak to you today, you think you would be sick.
You were so caught up in your thoughts that you didn’t realize the agent Bucky was talking to was leaving, and as she walked past you, you felt Bucky’s eyes on you. You met his gaze hesitantly, blinking wordlessly.
He paused, and you could almost see the gears turning in his brain as he decided what to do.
His smile dissipated, and he turned his back on you.
When you returned home that night, you cried your eyes out. You sat on the couch forlornly, staring at the door, half-expecting him to burst through at any moment with an apology and kisses waiting to be pressed onto your lips.
Midnight struck, and you went to bed alone.
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Six days.
Bucky had not spoken to you in six days, and honestly, he felt like shit.
He had never been so angry at you before, but he was surprised at himself that his silent streak had lasted so long. To be honest, the time had passed quickly, as he had kept himself as busy as possible. 
As Bucky came down from his angry high, the feeling of guilt and sadness overwhelmed him at the thought of you being unhappy. He knew that this period of time would be tough on you, although he stood by his point that you should not have read his file behind his back, especially as you knew how sensitive he was about his past.
And yet, ultimately, he recalled that you only had his best interests at heart, even if you were going about it the wrong way. He sighed as he approached the Tower elevator, stepping inside just as Sam came running down the hallway, shouting at him to hold.
Bucky stabbed the close door button repeatedly, cursing as Sam slid past just in the nick of time, punching him playfully.
“You in a mood, princess?” he snickered, taking note of the dark circles under Bucky’s eyes. “You been up all night with your girl?”
Bucky let out a tsk. He sighed as the elevator descended.
“No. Haven’t spoken to her actually,” he admitted.
“Woah, wait. What do you mean?” Sam asked when he realized Bucky was being serious.
“Had a fight,” Bucky said reluctantly.
Sam frowned lightly. “On her birthday?”
Bucky froze as he opened his mouth to clarify that the fight had began a few days ago. His mind racked to confirm today’s date.
Shit. It was your birthday yesterday.
“Oh fuck,” Bucky said, head lolling back to bash against the glass elevator wall. 
“You okay, man?” Sam asked, clearly concerned.
“I messed up,” he sighed in response, pinching the bridge of his nose. God, now he wanted to cry. How could he do this to you? He was already beginning to feel like he’d gone overboard with his reaction as the days passed and the red haze of anger dissolved from his eyes, clouding his better judgment, but now he truly felt like he had gone about everything so wrongly. 
You had always gone on about the importance of communication in a relationship, and how you both needed to work together to overcome any challenges, and that one of the things you valued the most was being open and honest.
He imagined you sat alone at home, on your birthday, waiting expectantly for him to turn up. 
His chest hurt.
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You lay down in bed as the sun set, darkness filling the room.
You had the covers over your head as the tears wet your pillow, your head hurting so much from all the crying and dehydration.
Your world was truly coming down around you. You were about to lose the best thing that had ever happened to you. Bucky was going to leave you, and it was your fault. The past few days had really unveiled your most deep rooted fear, that the love of your life was going to abandon you.
“You’re so stupid,” you whispered to yourself. “So stupid. So fucking stupid.”
You ignored the incessant buzzing of your phone. Your friends had been calling you since your birthday yesterday, concerned that you hadn’t picked up even once. You didn’t care. If Bucky wasn’t here, then you just wanted to be alone.
You always knew you weren’t good enough for him. Always knew that he would leave you eventually. Out of all the people in the world, what on earth would make him choose you?
You threw the covers off of you as a new surge of rage overwhelmed you. 
“You are so fucking stupid!” you screamed out loud, letting the anger seep through your body, expel through your lungs. You stormed over to your mirror and punched the glass once, twice, until it cracked and sliced your knuckles, blood trickling immediately over your hand.
Bucky was going to leave you. 
Your knees buckled and you collapsed onto the floor, head hanging as tears dripped down onto the carpet. 
“So stupid,” you continued in a whisper. “So useless, so stupid, so -”
“What the fuck are you doing?” came a loud voice, and your head snapped up with such speed that your head spun.
Bucky was standing in the open doorway, expression aghast as he took in the sight of you. Red, swollen eyes, bleeding hand, sitting in front of the broken mirror.
“Bucky,” you said weakly, voice trembling. He had come back to break up with you.
You always knew he would do it eventually. Your relationship was too good to be true.
“Oh my god,” Bucky hissed as he darted forward, moving down on his knees to join you and gently lifting your wounded hand. “What have you done?”
You started to cry again, feeling so pathetic. Bucky shook his head, eyes frantic.
“No, no, no, doll, please don’t cry,” he said, his voice softening.
“I’m sorry,” you garbled, voice thick with guilt. “I know I fucked up, I know. I’m so sorry Bucky. Please don’t leave me.”
The desperation in your voice broke Bucky’s heart. He wrapped his arms around you, holding you as tight as he could without hurting you, pressing his lips against the top of your head.
“Listen to me. I’m not going to leave you,” he said firmly. He pulled back and studied your face carefully, trying to keep his voice steady for your sake. “I need to patch you up, okay?”
You sniffled, nodding once before he stood up and disappeared into the bathroom. He reappeared with a first aid kit, kneeling down once more and inspecting your hand.
“Why did you do that, doll?” he murmured, a pained look in his eyes as he began to clean you up. It wasn’t a serious injury, just a scratch compared to some of the other battle wounds you had received in the past, but the idea that you had done that to yourself made Bucky so sad.
“I’m sorry,” you whispered again. “I’m just - I don’t know. I’m so angry at myself. Please will you forgive me? For everything?”
Bucky’s eyes welled up as he paused with his tending to your hand, biting down hard on the inside of his cheek to stop himself from crying. You were the most important person in the world to him and he had been pushing you away, had completely forgotten your birthday, and you had hurt yourself because of him when all you wanted was to help him.
“I forgive you,” he whispered, kissing your forehead tenderly. “Will you forgive me?”
“There’s nothing to forgive you for,” you insisted as he resumed cleaning your wound. You could see his eyes were wet, and you were nonplussed at why that would be.
“Yes, there is,” Bucky said, wearing a look of shame that you didn’t understand. “I know that your heart is always in the right place. Instead of talking to you about it, I just shut you out. No matter how angry I was, I shouldn’t have done that. I hurt you.”
He worked quickly, bandaging your hand and slowly holding your wrist after. His solemn blue eyes finally met yours.
“I love you so much. I should have stayed to talk, but I just… left. I shouldn't have done that.” He took a deep breath. “I walked away because I couldn’t stand the thought of you knowing everything. Knowing all the people I’ve killed - some of them innocent people. Read about how cold I was, the - the complete lack of mercy I showed. I am a monster.”
“Bucky,” you whispered, lifting your good hand to tenderly touch his face. You were hesitant, as if you were afraid he would withdraw from your touch. Instead, he leaned against your palm, eyes closed. He turned to press a kiss into your hand.
“I thought - “ you began, taking a deep breath at the insecurity and uncertainty that still plagued you. “I thought you were going to break up with me.”
Bucky’s eyes opened to stare at you forlornly, as if hurt that you would even have this thought.
“Never,” he said firmly. “You have no idea how much I have missed you.”
You launched yourself into his arms then, willing Bucky’s strong arms to encircle you. He did just that, holding you close as you sobbed quietly into his shoulder. 
“Let me make it up to you, okay?” Bucky murmured. “Belated birthday celebration.”
“It’s enough that you’re here,” you whispered.
You still had a lot to talk about, but you felt so much better now that Bucky was standing by your side again. Maybe everything was going to be alright.
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a-simple-imagine · 5 months
Text
Nothing But Cowards
Requested by anonymous: “I was wondering if you could just write about, having a fight and then make up, fluff and angst? If not that’s totally fine”
“I'd like to request a Jordan Li x fem reader where they're dating in secret from the friend group because of everything going down but one morning they oversleep and one of their friends find them curled up in bed together and it's followed by giggles and fluff?”
Pairing: Jordan Li x fem!reader
words: 3.7k+
WARNINGS - mentions of weird hospitals and tortured kids, strong language
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GodU had always been your parents' dream. they held such high and heavy hopes for you. their perfect little superhero. a future member of the seven. when you were younger, you hated the idea. you felt... exploited. they forced this life onto you. gave you compound V and for what? so you could become some clog in a corporate machine? help sell merchandise for Vought? but as you got older and realised that you were kinda stuck with your powers, you felt more obligated to follow through with their dream. to actually be a hero. so you applied for Godolkin University. got in. and became a crime-fighting major. that is how you met Jordan Li. They were much stronger than you would ever be. both physically and mentally. the ability to shift between two forms gave them two separate skill sets all wrapped up in one identity. and they were so confident in their identity. not always a boy. not always a girl. just so confidently themselves. and you admired them so much. They were truly the strongest person you knew or at least you thought so.
it was a weird moment shrouded in the darkness of night. you were shaking a little from rage or the cold, you couldn't quite tell. everything was so incredibly fucked. Marie's roommate had gone missing because of some stupid plan of Andre's imagining. you just found out that there was some weird hospital under the school that was experimenting on people; including Sam, Luke's brother who was apparently still alive and in fact did not commit suicide. not to mention Luke was still gone. he used to give some great advice. used to kick your ass in sparring sessions but would occasionally let you win just to keep you on your toes. he was your friend. and you missed him a lot. you could never understand what happened; or why it happened. All these mysteries were piling up like old comic books. so many chapters to one confusing story that if you missed a single issue it became almost impossible to follow. this was impossible to follow. everyone was arguing. people were taking sides. Marie wanted to find Emma, who had infiltrated the woods, to help Andre who was trying to save the kids trapped down there. Jordan was more pissed about rankings than tortured kids. Cate wanted everyone to just back up and not do anything reckless. you wanted to yell at them. you knew rankings were important to Jordan. they wanted to be the best. at least Cate was worried about not dying. your parents' words hang heavy on your shoulders. this was your chance to do some good. to live up to their dreams without becoming just another vought puppet.
"don't you want to be a hero?" your voice is loud. louder than expected. the question was mainly aimed at Jordan. the person who went toe to toe with Golden Boy just to protect Marie; someone they hardly even knew at that point. that was after the club. you wish you could say you don't think about that night. everyone else seemed to just move on but it haunts your dreams. it's a cloudy memory of white powder and thick red liquid. "we almost killed someone."
there is a brief flash of something. Regret, maybe? before the expression turns dark and defensive. "we didn't do shit." and that was partly the problem. you didn't hold the weapon but you still ran. you left a woman to bleed out because you were too high. even sober, you wouldn't have been able to do much but you could have done something. anything. Nobody likes to talk about that day. the same way nobody talks about what went down with Luke. or how, if they had their way, nobody would talk about this weird hospital. If Cate and Jordan got their way, you'd just go back to school where all that mattered was who held that number one spot. currently andre. not Jordan.
"Exactly which is worse, if it wasn't for Marie we would have all been royally fucked." you articulate. irritation bubbling deep in your chest. "we can do some good here- we can help people."
"you're just gonna get yourself killed"
"at least I'm not running away again," you say. Jordan can make all the scooby doo references she wants but you wouldn't entertain the thought of leaving this down to Marie once again. "you wanna know why Andre is number one instead of you?"
"politics."
"because he is the only one person here who is trying to do something." You growl. "you're just a selfish asshole." if all they cared about was their ranking then you had to explain it in terms they'd understand. Their jaw tenses.
"Okay so what does that make you?" they spit. a particular venom dripping from their tone. "I've helped people- actually saved people. can you say the same?" they ask. "you're basically scared of your own shadow."
"Jordan don't."
"no," they interrupt Cate before she can continue. "I may be selfish for not wanting to go on some stupid suicide mission but when you realise what's really at stake here, don't come crying to me." Jordan's words hang heavy in the air, how do you even reply to that? your mouth opens but nothing comes out so you just walk away. Leaving your friends to continue arguing. 
a bitter flavour lingers in your mouth. a painful feeling concealed deep inside your chest. you can't control how others perceive you but is that really how Jordan sees you? some coward who ran to them whenever things got tough? maybe they were right. you were no hero. you may have superpowers. you may spend hours studying techniques and training in the gym but that's just school. it didn't mean anything. You had never saved the day. you had never actually done anything. you haven't spoken to Jordan. Not since that night. they had texted a few times but you haven't even opened them. you don't want anything to do with them right now but you'd be lying if you said you didn't miss them. you missed them a lot. nobody knew about your situation with Jordan. you had both decided to keep it on the down low while you figured stuff out. and with everything going on, it had just never been the right time.
a knock at the door. you don't bother getting out of the bed you had been rotting in for hours; staring up at the ceiling as the sun went down and darkness enveloped the room. another knock. you bury yourself deeper in your duvet but the knocking doesn't stop. it just gets louder. a loud groan as you roll out of bed. your roommate was always forgetting their key but when the door opens, your stomach sinks. it wasn't your roommate. you instantly close the door.
"Seriously,"
"fuck off," you yell back. they knock again. yanking open the door, you spy Jordan Li once again. femme. sweaty. gym gear. duffel bag hanging off their shoulder. "fuck off," you push on the door again but they slap their hand against it.
"Just give me a chance," they probably just wanted to yell at you some more and you weren't in the mood. you shove harder. "I could stand here all night." your brow creases. Jordan probably would too. they're very persistent. with a heavy sigh, you relinquish pressure on the door and it swings open as they let themselves in.
"what do you want?" your eyes follow her as she drops the gym bag down and begins wandering around your room. they had been here before. They knew what it looked like. their hand slides over the wood of your desk. they pick up the open book, presumably glancing over the content before dropping it back down. "Jordan."
"hm," they look at you almost perplexed. like they had been lost in their own little world.
"what do you want?" you request more firmly. they just stared back like it was a crazy thing to be asking. they drop back to lean against your desk. you're waiting for them to say something. anything. but their gaze just falls to the floor. you sigh softly, still loitering by the door. you would leave if this wasn't your room. "why are you here, Jordan?"
"I wanted to see you," their shoulders rise and fall. "everything is so fucked up. a hospital under the school like what the fuck?"
a secret hospital under the school was very messed up. you can't even imagine the things they get up to down there. also, Luke's brother was down there. that's why Emma went down in the first place before she disappeared. "yeah," you nod a little. "I guess."
"And Luke's brother being alive this whole time?" you wonder where this is going. you knew all this. you were there when everyone was arguing. your brow furrows a little.
"Can you get to the point?"
"well it's a little fucked isn't it?"
"You're being weird," you state. monitoring them carefully. they still wouldn't look at you but they did push up from the desk and towards the mini fridge.
"you got anything to drink?" they question, pulling it open.
"Jordan. leave."
"What?" they ask, still looking in your mostly empty little fridge.
"I said leave," you declare firmly. "I would like you to leave."
"why?"
"you know why." they sighed loudly, thrusting the fridge closed with a loud slap. "you don't get to just pretend nothing happened."
"I don't know why you're angry, you're the one who called me selfish." Jordan insists. "Said Andre was better than me."
"You are selfish. All you care about is your stupid ranking."
"It's not stupid," Jordan fires back. "It is important if I wanna get somewhere,"
"Who fucking cares," you groan "Like I get it, you wanna be a hero but this is way bigger than all that."
"And what are you gonna do exactly?" there's a bite behind her words. She's getting defensive. "Whats your plan to save the day Superman?"
"I don't..." you snap before trailing off to a much quieter tone. "know exactly,”
"It's a death wish,"
"We have to do something.”
“no, we don’t.” Jordan replies. “we don’t have to do anything. This is way above our pay grade.”
“of course, you’d say that,” you groan loudly. “can you leave now.”
"I-" They seem like they're about to bite back but they stop short. a tense jaw. they let it go. "I miss you, okay."
"I don't care," you did care. "leave." you yank open the door. For a beat, they seem taken aback but it rapidly fades. "now."
"just hear me out."
"no Jordan," you huff. "just go. I'm not arguing with you anymore."
they watch you for a second. "I don't want to argue" they clarify. "please?” there’s an unusual desperation in their voice. one you’ve never heard before. it builds a degree of sympathy amongst your anger. you let the door fall closed with a click.
“fine," you cross your arms over your chest "What do you want?"
"you were right," she declares softly. the statement alone takes you by surprise. Jordan? admitting she was wrong? you'd comically gasp if you weren't annoyed with them.
"I don't understand."
"I said you were right."
"No, I heard you," you explain. "look, Jordan-"
"I'm sorry, okay?" they reply sharply "I'm sorry."
"Sorry for what?"
"why are you making this so difficult?" Jordan asks. "I've apologised so can we just watch a movie or something?" you raise a curious brow. Surely they weren't naive enough to believe you would simply forgive them just like that? There was more to this story that they were avoiding.
"you can't be fucking serious," a humourless laugh. "you don't even really mean it."
"I do though."
"no you don't," you sigh. walking towards them. "look at me and apologise- apologise properly."
"Ugh, I already apologised," they groan loudly, pairing it with a roll of their eyes. It just annoys you even more. "why can't you just forgive me?"
"Because you don't even know why you're apologising," you stress. "it's half-baked. you don't mean it. and I'm tired so-”
"I'm fucking scared" they blurt out. "I'm scared."
A look of surprise; shock. Their very loud confession caught you off guard. Jordan Li wasn't scared of anything. They’d made that bold claim a great many times. "of what?"
"of losing you," they yell back; their hands come up to run slowly over their face. Their hair becomes shorter. They physically grow taller. Shielded by his fingertips, it's pretty apparent that he shouldn't have said that or at least hadn't meant to. You don't know what to say; your head tilts slightly to one side. how do you respond to that? it still wasn't technically an apology. "for fuck sake."
"of losing me?" you recite slowly. "why would you lose me?"
"Because you're an idiot," they urge. "who wants to help people."
"dude."
"Sorry but like it's true. you're a fucking idiot," they repeat. "and I admire that."
"I'm... confused," you mumble softly.
"I admire how much you wanna help people despite knowing it’s stupid and you're probably gonna die" You can't tell if Jordan is just oblivious to what he was saying but it was far from getting him back in your good graces. "I wish I could be like that. naive enough to think I can make a difference."
"I feel like you're just insulting me," you comment.
they shrug a little. "I know this is still kinda new, the whole me and you thing but…” you can tell this is hard for them. expressing their feelings was not their strong suit. Their head hangs low. “it doesn’t matter,” they walk towards you but instead veer off towards their bag. you reach out for them; taking their hand. they were running hot, a sweaty hand.
“you can tell me,” you express, a gentle squeeze. “we’ve been friends for ages…”
“you’re just gonna call me selfish again.” their voice a whisper but they make no effort to pull away. You step closer.
“then you’ve got nothing to lose, right?” it’s a joke. a harmless one but they don’t laugh or even acknowledge it.
“I… I just don’t want you dying before we get a chance to really explore whatever this,” they use their free hand to motion between you. “is. so yeah, I lashed out because I like you or whatever and want you alive. sorry.” you watch them for a moment. their inability to meet your gaze. the light dusting of pink that graced their cheeks. it was really sweet if not a little unexpected. Jordan was so cool most of the time. it was a rarity to see them express such emotions. it makes you smile. you just laugh a little in amusement.
"Jordan," you say warmly. "you're not gonna lose me," you step even closer, reaching for their other hand; running your thumb over their knuckles. "I understand what you're saying but I don't think it's reason enough not to help,"
"I know," the express softly, finally meeting your gaze. there is something unspoken behind those eyes but you choose not to push. “I wish it was.”
you keep your eyes on there’s taking in this tender moment. a moment of vulnerability. a moment of connection. you relish in the way their hands fit so comfortably in yours. you really liked Jordan. liked their attitude. admired their strength. wished for their sense of loyalty. you were so smitten. so lucky to be their chosen person. a smile settles before you slowly lean in. It catches them off guard but they soon settle into it. “I’m scared too,” whispered against their lips. "but I think the bravest thing we can do is try anyway.“ his eyes flutter closed, letting his forehead fall against yours.
"I didn't mean it when I called you a coward," Jordan whispers, his eyes open. Lingering on yours. “You’re the bravest person I know.”
"I am a coward," you express. "I've always wanted to be a hero. it's all my parents want. but I'm scared. terrified. I never could have fought Luke like you did. but I wanna try now. I want you to try too," you ghost their lips. It's subtle; intimate. "if you really wanna protect me, Jordan, you'd help because I'm doing this with or without you."
"do I have to decide right now?" they ask quietly. You're almost disappointed by their reply but you can't really blame them. This wasn't another student hero gone rogue. This was a whole institution willing to do anything to keep its secrets. "do you forgive me?"
"do you forgive me?"
"I was never mad at you,"
"I was mad at you." you declare.
"I know," they nod. "you weren't exactly subtle about it." their expression becomes playful and bright; a strong contrast from the conversation you were just having. You can't help but smile as you pull back.
"do you wanna stay over tonight?" there's a shift in the air. all that tension fading away. you're not mad. you're not thrilled either. but you liked Jordan. a lot. and you could understand their desire to protect you. In a way, it was very sweet. You didn't realise how much they liked you. "we could watch that movie? or Property Brothers? whatever you want."
"Whatever I want, huh?" their hands vacate yours and instead move to your hips. Pulling you close. ever so close. pressing their body ever so slightly into yours "Anything at all?" masc! Jordan was taller than their male counterpart but far less intimidating. firmer. gentler. it’s a rather present contrast.
"you're such a perv,"
"you don't even know what I was gonna say," they insist.
"Anyone with half a brain could figure it out," you tease. their hands slip around to the small of your back pulling you flush against them. playing into your words. "but what Jordan wants. Jordan gets." whispered in their ear, you place a gentle kiss upon their cheek. "right?"
you can feel them practically shudder against you. A heavy sigh left their lips. "oh she wants to play tonight?" all signs of sincerity washed away by something darker. desire. you meet their eyes, lips quirk up into a smirk before they lean in once more. it’s ever so light but you’re quick to deepen the kiss; chasing that warmth that spills through your veins but they pull away instead. mischief laces their expression. their fingers sliding under the hem of your shirt. they pull back just enough to murmur, “I’m gonna make you beg for it,” their words hot against your ear. A shiver spills down your spine as you lean into them; wanting to be closer. As close as possible as they guide you back towards your bed.
it's safe to say you're smitten with the infamous Jordan Li. and when it comes down to it you're delighted when you're together. they bring out a more mischievous side of you. and you like to think you bring out a more vulnerable side of them. You shuffle further into their embrace. Basking in the feeling of their arms around you as you hide from the rising sun peeking through the blinds. A content hum as you drift in and out of consciousness. Still so early. You feel them lean more into you.
"what the fuck," a voice drags you to the land of the living. And as your tired eyes flutter open, your friends stare back. Both you and Jordan shoot up, instantly breaking any contact. Pulling the covers up to hide the fact you were both very naked. Marie stands at the end of your bed; wide eyes and a slightly agape mouth. Cate and Andre are just by the door. how the fuck did they even get in? "we should- sorry," you watch Marie scramble for the door shoving Andre out just as Cate yanks him.
you both fall back down in unison. If anyone had seen it would almost seem planned. After a moment, you roll back into them. giggling into the crook of their neck. after a moment you nip the skin. "guess we're not a secret anymore," muttered against their skin.
"This isn't funny."
"it kinda is," you shrug "Quite the shock for those three." A giggle before you sink your teeth into her neck earning yourself a satisfied sigh but they're quick to push you away. A stern look on their face
"you agreed it was best we didn't tell everyone until all this craziness was over."
"yeah but don't you feel just a little relieved," you ask. You can practically see the gears turning in their head. It's... Cute. You move so that you're now straddling them, hands drifting delicately over their chest. Their skin is so warm; and soft. Their short bob is a mess against your pillow. they looked so peaceful. so beautiful. A strip of yellow sunlight reflected off their chain. "I'm glad everyone knows now. plus," you smile mischievously. "now I can kiss you whenever I want. " You lean down slowly and place your lips against hers. "and that's all I want," mumbled against their lip.
"I guess it is one less thing to worry about," they muse, bringing their hands up to rest against your hips. her fingers apply just a little bit of pressure. you peck their lips once more before pulling away. a gentle tap on their nose, their face scrunches up.
"you shift in your sleep sometimes did you know that?"
"What?"
"you were definitely a guy when we fell asleep and then suddenly I'm snuggling up to a girl? is it like a conscious choice or?" they hesitate for a moment before playfully shoving you off them.
"shut up,"
"ow!!" you groan dramatically, falling down against the bed. "ow. that hurt so much. I'm in so much pain. how could you be so mean," you groan loudly, shuffling about a little for dramatic effect.
"you’re so dramatic,” Jordan rolls their eyes but a mischievous grin spreads over their lips. “now get up we’re gonna be late.”
“for what?”
“class.” they sit up. a hand coming to settle on your stomach. you don’t move. and neither do they. and in those few seconds, everything feels at peace. “you really are beautiful,” they eventually say before finally getting out of bed.
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lichenes · 1 month
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Omg i alove your Swann Arlaud fics!!You literally make my day better!Can you write a fic how Vincent and the reader are forced by their friends to play a silly game like 9 minutes in Heaven and they finally confess to each other and make out <3
Blushin'... lowkey... Thank you anon :*** CW: mentions of a boner (nothing happens), SFW wc: 628
_____✿°•∘ɷ∘•°✿ … ✿°•∘ɷ∘•°✿ … ✿°•∘ɷ∘•°✿ … ✿°•∘ɷ∘•°✿_____
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You and Vincent could barely keep your hands off of eachother when you got the chance to be alone. It got to the point where you'd text him a lips emoji and he'd reply back with a running emoji and show up at your door, ready.
Vincent understood you wanted to take things slow but it was getting to the point where your relationship was, rather than moving forward, staying in one place.
Not many people knew about your little love affair. You knew you weren't exclusive and you didn't expect faithfullness from him but you could feel the heart pangs pricking at you when you saw him pick up yet another person, strangely resembling you.
The ones closest to you encouraged you both to confess already but you were too shy to do it and Vincent was slowly losing the confidence if you truly liked him back. His little distractions weren't working anymore and he wished you would just give him a sign.
To say you looked ravishing that evening would be an understatement. Vincent couldn't keep his eyes off of you and he was due to pop a boner if he didn't excuse himself from the situation. You weren't making it easy as you tugged at the sleeve of his sweater for him to follow you to the circle of your mutual friends.
"C'mon Vincent, it'll be fun." You said reassuring him. "I'm not 17 anymore. It's childish." He groaned. You were both invited to a game of 'spin the bottle'. In reality he didn't really like the idea of some other person stealing you away and basically being free to do whatever they wanted with you. If it were to be his turn he could at least imagine it was you as earlier the host informed him that the lightbulb has blown out.
He was jealous, he could admit that to himself. Not to you though, never to you. You sat down cross-legged and he situated himself next to you, your knees touching. "Okay it's Vincent's turn." Someone said. He leaned forward and spun the bottle. It was spinning quickly, everyone curious on who it would land on.
To everyone's suprise it landed on you. 'Ooh's could be heard throughout the room as you stood up, pretending to be embarrassed by effectively everyone knowing what you two would be doing.
When you entered the closet you put your elbows on his shoulders and got close to his face. "Fancy seeing you here, pretty boy." You said in an undertone. "Hm.... likewise, sweetness" He mumbled out, your lips were almost touching. An inch more and...
"Vincent." You said firmly. "...yes chérie?" You groaned quietly as he tilted your head and started nipping at your neck. "Oh- Vincent..." you felt him smile and you put your hand on his chest. "Wait."
You assumed he looked at you puzzled, as aforementioned, it was dark and you couldn't tell. "I hate to do this but... do you like me?" You paused. "Honestly and truly, do you?" His voice seemed to be stuck in his throat. He cleared his throat and you felt him shuffle around into what seemed to be a kneel as his voice came from lower than before.
"I give up a thousand job offers, every opportunity to work in Paris and even living on my own to spend my life with you ma douce." You felt a surge of emotions running through you. "I'd let you ruin me, untill there was nothing left. Just so you could build me up again."
You leaned down and held his face in between your palms. You placed a delicate kiss on his lips, more tender than anything you were used to in your fervent make-out sessions.
"You're my everything." _____✿°•∘ɷ∘•°✿ … ✿°•∘ɷ∘•°✿ … ✿°•∘ɷ∘•°✿ … ✿°•∘ɷ∘•°✿_____ masterlist
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writingoddess1125 · 5 months
Note
Okay since Corazon is dead, sadly, and he will never get to see his child grow, do you think reader will take them to his grave and told stories ( mostly about how clumsy he was) to their kid?
Heart of Gold
Ready to Cry! You've been Warned
⚠️ Warnings ⚠️ Sad Topics, Character Death, Bittersweet.
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If you Like Click Here! <-
"Mami! Mami!" Your 6 year old daughter called out to you, running ahead as she smiled back at you proudly- it seemed a 20 minute hike didnt slow her down as much as it did you.
Dulce looked more like him everyday- it would be difficult to hide her once she got older... his big goofy smile, The Mess of blonde hair that seemed impossible to tame besides a beanie you put her in.
With a on her lips she continued to trudge through the snow, not letting the winter weather denture her it seemed. She hated to miss the weekly visits to her father..
It was another few minutes of walking before you reached it- The beautiful open clearing that had a single headstone surrounded by clear untouched snow besides two bare rose bushes on either side of the grave. It looked truly sorrowful during the winter and made the reality harder-
During the spring the clearing was filled with pink bleeding heart flowers and the rose bushes would blood, making it feel like Corazon was near by and next to you. Youd had planted it all when your daughter was one and the since bloomed just around her birthday- You'd said it was a gift from her father.
Dulce rushed forward, Sitting right infront of the stone. Uncaring of the cold as she started her normal routine. Clearing the snow off the stone while chatting away.
"Hace Frío.. don't worry! All the snow gone soon" Dulce said cheerfully, finishing wiping the snow as you took a seat. Pulling out candles to light, however pausing when you saw something to the left of the stone. Picking it up it was a fresh pack of unopened cigarettes- the same brand Corazon uses to smoke.. setting it down I front as you decided to leave the offering someone had clearly left your partner-
Dulce helped you light the candles and set out some of the things your brought, a cherry cake and a bottle of the liquor he liked. Once everything was set you sighed content.
"Can you tell me about him?" Dulce asked, always asking this when you two visited and wanting a new story about him.
"Yes my darling- Well He Acted very tough" You said with a giggle, choosing your words carefully.
"See- Your father had the act of a big tough guy, but if you scratched the surface you saw how much of a Goofy sweet man he was. Biggest heart too"
Dulce smiled widely, her attention fully on you as you spun your tale. Talking about the time Corazon had taken you out on a date, trying to be smooth and woo you over as he reached over to wrap a arm around you- however his lit cigarette catching the feathers of his coat and setting him ablaze. Dulce laughing as you described the child like scream he had as he tossed the coat to the ground and rapidly stopped on it like a mad man-
Or when he tried to walk towards you in a 'attractive' way- long strands and -but his long giraffe like legs seemed to not catch up as he face planted hard right before you cracking a tooth and givibg you a bit cheesy smile as you helped him up.
You had Dulce laughing and smiling for half an hour as you told her new and exciting tales of her father. After a while she had to take a moment to catch her breath- you as well. Dulce looking to the stone, as a serious look went over her eyes- Biting her lip a bit hesitantly.
"..Mamí... how did papa.. leave?" She asked softly, you frowning softly at her words.
"That is something even I'd like to know.." You said softly, looking at the gravestone of your lover. You had so many questions yourself... who would kill him? Who had brought him back? Had he intended to leave you and Dulce the way he had?
You wish at times as well it had been you who had brought him back, placing his tombstone- but more then anything you were greatful for whoever it was.. They had brought him home. Your hand reaching out and touching the icy stone with a gentle hand.
Dulce sees you do this, reaching out herself to touch the stone- her tiny fingers flinching at the coldness of it all. She stared for a moment, before reaching into her pockets clumsily-
"Mira, Papa, hice esto para ti- I made it in school" Dulce said softly as she set the now unfolded peice of construction paper down on the gravestone using the full box of cigarettes to pin it so it didn't fly away. There a crayon drawing of three stick figure people standing in the snow- Dulce in the middle holding your hand to the left and to her right a rendering of her father. She had never seen him- but you had told her what he looked like and even showed the single photo you had of him.
The stick figure man having a big red smile, a pink hat and the black feather coat- which looked like your daughter had done squiggles on his shoulder but that just made it sweeter. However what made your eyes misty was the big yellow heart on his chest and the blue halo around his pink hat.
"I hope you like it- Mamí says you had a heart of gold, I couldnt find gold so I hope yellow is okay?" Dulce said softly, beginning to talk about what she did to color it and make it pretty just for him. Speaking to the stone like he was truly there sitting infront of her, saying how she fell when she went to find a pink crayon since another kid took it and so on.
You bit your lip to hold back tears at this, The ache in your heart at the sight and you gently bowed you head to keep your daughter from seeing.
After a moment of silence you reached over, having finally been able to hold back your tears. Reaching over you pat your daughters back-
"Let's head back sugar" You say softly, Your little girl nodding as her nose wad starting to turn red. Scooping her up in your arms you turned away from the stone. Beginning the long walk back to your home-
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katesmemes · 2 months
Text
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feel free to change any pronouns, etc. || may contain some nsfw!
"I don't think that blush is your shade."
"I'll probably just stay home."
"This is the first critical rager of the year."
"You know what your doctor said."
"You need socialization."
"Why don't you use my tanning bed?"
"You're in need, babe."
"I'm really sorry you got electrocuted."
"Are you hot for anyone?"
"[Name], [Name], [Name], [Name], [Name], [Name], [Name]!"
"I don't know who that is."
"He doesn't play sports; he's cerebral."
"This party is gonna be clutch!"
"These things will turn your feet into hamburger helper."
"It's not haunted, just abandoned. Desecrated."
"Well, I heard [Name(s)] do witchcraft over there."
"I've never seen anybody there."
"I think it's really peaceful and quiet."
"I talk to him sometimes."
"I brought this for you."
"It's kinda morbid when I wear it so I wanted you to have it."
"That's really weird, [Name]."
"I just don't think anyone should be forgotten."
"Y'know, I wasn't gonna say anything, they were such a mess, but you look amazing now!"
"Oh my God, [Name], bag your face!"
"How do you know my name?"
"So what exactly happened to her?"
"I can never ever talk about it, for personal and legal reasons, and i also pinky swore, but I guess I can tell you. I trust you."
"I'd be screwed up if I were her, too."
"Hi, sorry, how do we know each other?"
"You're being so dramatic."
"This is not what I expected from you; you have so much potential."
"Lets find somewhere for you to sit for a bit, yeah?"
"I hate parties like this; I don't even know why I came."
"Your hair feels like easter grass."
"You know it's not nice to lead people on."
"I wish I was with you."
"It's okay; everyone does it."
"You should probably get going."
"Did you smash the mirror in the bathroom?"
"Do you know what happens to people who act out?"
"How about an apology?"
"I feel like I may want to apologize for what happened last night."
"Well, I'm glad you're okay."
"Oh, is there pizza left?"
"I think I'm gonna skip the movie."
"I'm just really tired from work."
"Do you know how hard that is on the groin muscles?"
"It doesn't even hurt anymore."
"Do you like this song?"
"We're better off up here in case anyone comes home."
"I haven't said this many words in a row in forever."
"I hate to say it, but you're either crazy, or just goddamned inconsiderate!"
"You're kind of absurd, aren't you?"
"I really don't get your fixation with that one."
"There are plenty of halfway-dece guys who would date you."
"I wanna help you, I really do, but I dunno how."
"It's a waste of time to try and fix a boy; it's better to just accept a guy's flaws."
"I don't know what you're talking about."
"What happened to your neck?"
"You don't want to hold my hand?"
"This whole place gives me the creeps, okay?"
"I thought that was a really cool thing to say."
"Don't feel bad about what we did!"
"You saved me."
"Is that a rad new trend or something?"
"I don't play with dolls anymore."
"I'm sure there's some explanation."
"You know I'm usually pretty cool about things, right?"
"I have a bad feeling about this."
"You have no idea how scary this is."
"I actually feel like something's wrong."
"People are so afraid of death because they dunno when it's gonna happen to them."
"I'm not afraid of death anymore."
"I don't wanna die a virgin."
"I want to do it with someone I truly love."
"You're so supportive."
"I love our conversations."
"I'm sorry, I don't mean to be rude."
"How about I drive since you're not feeling so good?"
"Your boobs look great by the way."
"This is just too freaking much."
"It's your fault we're screwed."
"You act like you're happy for me, and you care about me, but you're not really happy for me."
"You couldn't let me have this one thing?"
"You knew I liked him and you went after him on purpose!"
"I swear, I would never do that to you!"
"Guys usually only want me for one thing."
"It just was never gonna work out between us."
"I don't have feelings for you like that."
"Do you know how uncool that is?!"
"Uh, you're not making any sense."
"Thank you for being nice to me when no one else was."
"You're the type of person who usually bullies me or looks right through me, but you didn't."
"You actually went out of your way to try to tell people I was part of your family."
"You really actually wanted me to be your sister..."
"You're a great person, [Name]."
"Listen, we're running out of time."
"Make love to me."
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cupidddd-d · 7 months
Text
and i'm hating myself because you don't want to
in which he can't help but wonder why you chose him
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he went by many names. tartaglia. childe. the eleventh harbringer.
and ajax. the only name truly close to his heart. you were the only person outside of his family to ever call him that, and it sounded far too sweet coming from you.
you spoke to him as if you didn't know what kind of unforgivable things he had done. every word that fell from your lips was so saccharine that for a moment-- only a moment, he allowed his eyes to flutter shut and enjoy you fully without remorse or hesitation.
he allowed himself to believe that he truly deserved you, that he lived in a world in which he was worthy of you. but that world didn't exist. it never would, but he could dream. he could dream while he basked himself in the sunshine of your lovely voice, memorizing the way you felt in his arms.
but cruel reminders of his reality turned the dream into a nightmare. the scars on his hands that made him feel ashamed to even touch your soft, unblemished skin. the blankness and cruelty in his eyes that never deterred you. the summons from the fatui that cut his time with you short.
you were too good, too pure, and yet he allowed himself to revel in your presence. greedily accepting your love even if he was undeserving. selfishly keeping you for himself, even if there were so many others that came without the baggage.
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he played with your fingers as he laid in your lap, their smoothness so different from the texture of his own scarred ones, weathered from the decades of practicing weapons.
"ajax, you're being quiet again." you said softly, a fond smile on your face as you look down at him.
"am i?" he couldn't help the twitching of his lips at the sight of your smile.
you were too bright, too good for him. if you were the sun, he was the black hole looming over the solar system. if you were a flower, he would be the weed that stole all of the soil's nutrients to itself. you didn't see it yet, but he did. he would be your undoing. he would be the cause of your painful end. but he still couldn't bring himself to let you go. "what's going on in your head, huh?" you grinned, soft fingers carding through his hair.
"why....why did you choose me? why me? why....why do you love me?" and he finally spoke, his insecurities finally confirming their existence.
"that's a stupid question," you poked his forehead as if you couldn't believe the words coming from his mouth. "why wouldn't i love you? you're so easy to love, so of course i'd fall in love with you. i mean, you're gentle, you're kind, and you treat me well. what's not to love?" you speak plainly, as if it was so simple.
"but i almost destroyed your home," he looks at you with those sad blue eyes of his, and your heart cracks a little at the fact that he's been internalizing this despair for so long.
"yeah, and i love you despite all that. doesn't that say a lot about how much i truly care about you?" you say softly, not realizing the way those few words healed him.
he doesn't say anything, and you don't acknowledge the way his eyes well up with tears.
"i love you, you know that?" you trace the lines of his face, your fingers delicately smoothing across the slope of his nose and the arch of his eyebrows.
your eyes are so loving it makes him want to rip his heart out and present it to you, saying, "here it is. it's yours. it was only ever yours. to own, to break, to love, my heart beats only for you."
but he doesn't do that. he just stares up at you, and in that moment, he actually feels like he might be someone worthy of your love.
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Note
WIBTA for asking out my manager?
Hi there. Trust me this is a WIBTA and not just dating advice.
So I (35F) am basically working at my dream workplace. I cant say what exactly, because I know people follow this account there, but suffice to say its in a desirable industry with a lot of passionate folks, and while its a big (~150 people) place, there's an atmosphere of kindness and joy I've never seen anywhere else. I know a lot of you probably hate me for this, but I am truly aware how rare a workplace this is, and I am grateful. I dont take it for granted. Sometimes the work itself truly sucks, and the pay is outright atrocious, but when your coworkers have your back, it makes all the difference. They accept me even tho I'm trans, and when I've been sick or injured they make sure I'm taken care of. I feel like they are a family of sorts, and I've been working there for over a year now.
Anyways, this wonderful place is held up by a lot of wonderful people, but one in particular is my manager (30F). When I first got hired, I noticed she was cute, but more importantly she was welcoming and accepting. I set aside those feelings, of course, because its a workplace, but they havent gone away.
But lately, this all started to change. We now spend a lot of talking! We have lots of common interests, and there have been nights when both of us will stay for HOURS while the other works, just to chat about whatever! We even text a bit, even about not-work things. Sharing fandom stuff, whatever. The more and more we talked, the more I fell for her. I could hear her go on for days, even if its something I dont care about. Hell, she could read the dictionary and I'd be sitting there grinning because I get to hear her talk. I've got it bad! And then, a few weeks ago, she even brings up how she's given up on dating...but before I could ask more or say anything really, a coworker interrupted and the moment passed.
And here I am, weeks later, smitten like crazy. And I'd say "oh she obviously likes me, she sticks around for you, shares stuff with you" but she's like this with everyone. She's a bit airheaded honestly about it, I mostly find it endearing, but she could absolutely just be doing it because she talks like that to everyone. She's bisexual, and very pro-trans, so I dont think that would be an issue in any way.
But here's where the WIBTA part comes: I have told a couple other coworkers, and they brought up not only that its a dangerous move to date a manager, but also that it could hurt the workplace itself. I mean, this is a place where so many people get to have a joyful opportunity at life, and as I've said this is tremendously rare...what if I take up too much of this manager's time, and she cant be there for other workers? What if this manager gets fired for dating an underling, and gets replaced by someone awful? There's a whole lot of what-if's floating through my mind.
And then I start thinking, if I ask her out, wouldnt that be putting her in an awkward position? I mean if she doesnt like me, and has to turn me down, she still has to work with me, and I her. I can compartmentalize that, but...she might have more trouble. Is it selfish of me to even try, when I could just let well enough be? And on top of that, what did she mean by "giving up on dating"? It didnt sound like she was aromantic, just that she decided it wont happen, but maybe its just going to be a problem if I ask her out. It feels like the stakes of even asking her out are so high. So I keep chatting with her in hopes that I'll catch a lead, but...idk.
Anyways, I am primarily concerned with if it would be a dick move to anyone in my workplace, especially her, but genuinely I am just lost here. I've never dated anyone at a workplace, but like. The dating apps suck, and I dont think I've ever felt this way about anyone before. I've even thought about quitting or finding another workplace to make it an easier decision, but I feel like thats even worse; like it would put pressure on her to date me because I quit for her or something. So how about it? Should I keep my mouth shut, or is love truly worth all risks?
What are these acronyms?
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wongyuuu · 11 days
Text
seventeen as songs from eternal sunshine (ag)
a/n: like usual, i'll be giving songs and lyrics to each of the members, as well as small plots based on those lyrics. i don't plan to write all of these, but they are still my ideas (as basic as some of them might be). so if you are interested in writing one of them, you can message me about it. if you want to read one of them you can send in as ask or dm and i'll add it to my writing list
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• Seungcheol ➝ true story But I'll play whatever part you need me to And I'll be good in it, too ↳ seungcheol was willing to do anything for you, even if it meant destroying himself
• Jeonghan ➝ saturn returns Aha, it's time for you to get real about life and sort out who you really are  ↳ Jeonghan always thought that life would be easier if he just stayed as he was, unmoving. Turns out that there was more to life than just that
• Joshua ➝ we can’t be friends We can't be friends But I'd like to just pretend ↳ you and joshua always traveled through the same friend groups but you were never really close to one another, mostly because you might have carried a crush on him for years. but when joshua suddenly decides that he wants to be friends, you don’t have it in you to say no
• Jun ➝ end of the world Wonder if he’s thinkin’ ‘bout it too and smiling Wonder if he knows that that’s been what's inspirin’ me Wonder if he’s judging me like I am right now ↳ after a first date that went beyond expectations, you couldn't help but wonder if jun too felt those same butterflies when he thought about you
• Soonyoung ➝ eternal sunshine I found a good boy and he’s on my side You’re just my eternal sunshine, sunshine ↳ even after months after your break up, after you met someone new, you can’t help but think back to your relationship with soonyoung, and how you're sure you’ll never truly be able to move on from him, after all he was still your eternal sunshine
• Wonwoo ➝ i wish i hated you our shadow dance in a parallel plane Just two different endings ↳ looking from the outside, you and wonwoo are the same, but that couldn’t be further from the truth. in fact, you couldn't be further away from each other
• Jihoon ➝ Don’t Wanna Break Up Again This situationship has to end But I just can't refuse I don't wanna break up again  ↳ you know you have to get away from jihoon, but whenever he calls you’re ready to run toward him, even if it means breaking your own heart in the process
• Mingyu ➝ bye Didn't think you'd lose me Now it's just too late to choose me ↳ you’re tired of always being the second choice for Mingyu, maybe it’s time for you to become your first option 
• Seokmin ➝ supernatural This love's possessin' me, but I don't mind at all It's taking over me, don't wanna fight the fall ↳ you knew that you were falling way too deep for seokmin, but there was no way you’d ever try to catch yourself before you hit the ground
• Vernon ➝ yes, and? Now, I’m so done with caring What you think, no, I won't hide Underneath your projections Or change my most authentic life ↳ throughout all of his life, vernon heard about how uncommon and weird his interests were, so in order to fit in more easily, he did his best to hide the odd away, but he was done doing that, especially when all it did was keep you away from him. 
• Seungkwan ➝ ordinary things It’s funny, but it's true There's never going to be an ordinary thing As long as I'm with you ↳ life with Seungkwan was always extraordinary, he made sure of that
• Chan ➝ the boy is mine Promise you I'm not usually Like this, shit, it's like news to me, to me But I can't ignore my heart, boy ↳ you had always been chill and your relationship with had never been labeled, so at times it was hard to pinpoint where you stood, but one day, at a particular party, when a particular girl showed up, you couldn't help but be jealous
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if you enjoyed reading, please reblog and leave a comment, it really does mean the world to me and i would love to know your thoughts. thank you! 💕
if you want to be tagged in my next fics, please fill out this form
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Text
Not So Sweet (Genshin Impact)
Pairing: Neuvillette x gn!Reader
Word Count: 943
A/N: Okay, I'm slowly getting back into fic writing. I have lots planned! For now, have a bday Neuvi fic
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The first birthday you spend with your significant other is always the most important. Especially when your boyfriend is the Iudex of Fontaine. It was common knowledge that he was the busiest person in the nation. Which is why you paced back and forth, gazing at the pastries before you. Neuvillette would no doubt be working, even on his birthday. Was it even worth it to try and get him something? Would he be too busy to even notice it?
"Do you know what you want?" The employee asked, gazing at you with a curious expression. "Are you… shopping for someone?"
You hummed, your eyes scanning the display one more time. Finally, you straightened. "I'd like the small dark chocolate cake please. And a box of macarons."
If Neuvillette didn't like the sweets, at least Furina would eat it. The initial plan was to leave Neuvillette alone all day. You didn't want to add the stress of coming in unannounced. Then, when he got home, you would be waiting with the cake and a smile. As the employee boxed up the cake, your hands nervously wrung together. This would be fine, right? He wouldn't sneer at you for getting a cake. He wouldn't see birthdays as childish and something useless to celebrate? No, probably not. Neuvillette was surprisingly soft and understanding. 
The whole day seemed to pass with you anxiously trying to find something to do. It took everything in you to just not go to his office, pull him away from his work, and spend the whole entire day spoiling him to pieces. It's what he deserved. At first glance, Neuvillette came off as a stoic and aloof work-obsessed man. That's how you thought of him when you first met as well. But the more you got to know him, the more adorable he seemed. He was just a giant softie.
You heard the door open. You quickly got everything ready. You took out the cake and stuck in a candle. As his steps got closer, you lit the candle and then got into position. You held the cake and smiled brightly. Neuvillette walked in the room. You started to sing happy birthday until you saw the deep frown etched on his face. You stopped and stared at him. He stared back. Why was he not happy? Did you do something wrong? You hold the cake out.
"Uhm… h-happy birthday?" You asked, worry starting to fill you. Neuvillette tried to reply, but his face turned red and he looked away. Rain started to pour. "What's wrong?!"
He didn't say anything. You blew out the candle and set the cake down. You gently tugged on his hand. Neuvillette turned around, his gaze trained downwards. Did you truly mess up so badly that he wanted to cry? Your hands cupped his face so you could see his eyes. They were tired. You silently cursed yourself. Of course he didn't want to be surprised like this after a long day of work. That was so stupid of you. You didn't even ask how his day was, You just immediately busted out the cake and-
Neuvillette's lips pressed against yours. His hands moved from your shoulders to your waist. Just as you were about to deepen the kiss, he pulled away. "Thank you."
"You… you didn't hate the surprise?" 
He chuckled and shook his head. "I loved it. I was just… I didn't think you would do anything."
"What?" You frowned and brushed his cheek with your thumb. "Why not?"
"I don't know. I suppose I was waiting the whole day for you to come in. But you never did."
"I-I thought you'd be busy working."
He hummed and took your hands in his. "I was. But that doesn't mean I wouldn't have loved for you to come in. Besides, the Melusines and Furina kept me busy by dropping in with gifts."
"Oh."
Guilt filled you. You haven't even thought about what the Melusines and Furina would do. It was rude of you to think that he would be alone all day. Especially since Furina… existed. As Neuvillette walked over to the cake and bent down to inspect it, you ran a hand through your hair. The best you could do now is just try to make it up to him. You silently cut a piece of cake and handed it to him. The rain had cleared up by now, yet your mood was still sour.
"What type of cake is this?"
"Dark chocolate." You mumbled as you sat down at the table.
"Oh. Not too sweet. Perfect." Neuvillette took a bite. As much as he seemed to enjoy it, you still pouted to yourself. Your boyfriend held out a bite of cake. "Say 'aah'".
"Neuvillette, I really am sorry. I wanted to make your first birthday with us together perfect. But I made you feel unloved instead."
Neuvillette slowly set down the fork. His hand cupped your cheek. "I am not upset, my love. I am definitely not upset now. You surprised me with a cake and your beautiful smile. What more could I want?"
"I know, but-"
"It's alright. I am happy to spend the rest of the day with you."
You wrapped your arms around him, hugging him as tightly as you could. "I love you, Neuvillette."
"I love you too." He said your name with such joy and care, it almost melted your heart.
As he pulled away, you gave him a smile. "Now… I have a whole box of imported bottles of water with your name on it. Shall we enjoy it?"
Neuvillette's eyes lit up and he nodded. "Yes please!"
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xetswan · 3 months
Text
Switch of Daylight- Cliffs
(Alice x Reader x Jasper)
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[Ten] [Eleven] [Twelve]
Someone knocks on the truck door, startling me. I thought it was going to be Charlie but when it was Jacob instead, my eyebrows furrowed.
He opens the door and forces me to scoot over. I then look at the door to see Bella waving and then entering the house. "You apologized?" I asked, holding myself tightly. Not caring about anything else.
"Yes, and I need to apologize to you as well." He doesn't look me in the eyes as he says this. "It's fine Jake." I shrug it off but he disagrees.
"It's not fine. I didn't understand anything and immediately jumped on you. You're nothing like the Cullens." He says, I look up at him. "Jacob, the Cullens have done nothing to you." I cross my arms, "whatever, that's not the point of this talk. I should've never said those nasty things about you. Your situation... it's pretty serious and I'm sorry." He sincerely says in a soft tone. "I have another thing to bring up to you." He tells me and I nod for him to keep talking, bringing my knees up to my chest as I listened.
"Victoria, that red headed chick. You know she's after Bella-" "Yes I already knew that." I chuckled, "why?" My nose scrunches, confused on why he would bring something up I already obviously know.
"Well you know she's after you too right?" He asks, giving me a serious look and then I see in the forest line, Sam and Paul's wolves poking out. "Yeah, Laurent might've mentioned it." I look back to him, now tensed up from the conversation.
"I don't think it's to kill you though. I think she wants to trigger the curse." Jacob says, he's hesitant though. I think Sam fully explained everything to him for which I'm grateful but he should know I don't think I could ever truly trust him again. "Finish what James was trying to accomplish." I finish Jacob's words. Now thinking it all over. Before he turned me he said he wanted me to turn into a vampire so he could kill me and it would be permanent. But he didn't know if that was actually true.
"She figured out what James wanted to know." I sigh out, putting my head down.
He pulls me into his arms and I actually felt a tear pass my eyes, startling me but nothing that's supposed to make sense is anymore so I ignore it. "I'm scared, Jake." My body trembles as he holds me a little tighter.
"Hey, it's okay." He assures me, "we're gonna keep you safe." Even in the arms of Jacob all I can think about are Alice and Jasper.
The next day I decided to go hunting myself. I haven't gotten to do so in a while and I need to have enough strength to not react to other people's blood.
I'm not going to get into anything gory, of course attacking an animal I try to keep to a minimum due to the guilt I feel. Even if this is the better way I still hate doing this. Yeah, I ate meat as a human but I didn't have to do the killing to eat it. To my left I hear leaves rustling, almost scaring me until I realized it wasn't as close as I thought. Moments later a large body makes its way from the trees. I shake my head, smiling. "Hey Jake, Embry." I acknowledge the one behind him.
Jacob nods his head slightly, coming over to look at the animal I covered with leaves, then turning to look at me. "I uh, feel bad." I rub the back of my neck before wiping the blood from my mouth.
"Still on the search for Victoria?" I question as if I could understand them. I mainly go by body language. Embry huffs meaning they definitely still are. That was until we heard a laugh. Jacob gets in front of me and then we see a glimpse of red hair.
Jacob and Embry go after her as I stand there confused on if I should go help or not, then I remember I told Bella I'd meet her back at the house after hunting.
Racing home I get there to see Bella's truck gone. I begin to panic, using my speed ability to check around the house before thinking next of where she could be.
The guys weren't supposed to allow her to leave so most of them might be chasing after Victoria. I hurry up and  go to the Rez. Fuck, I don't know where she could be around here.
I run to Sam's house, banging on the door like a mad woman. It swings open and his face is furrowed.
"[Name], what happened?" I push past him in the house. "Where's my sister?" I look around, going into the kitchen then searching in other rooms. Only to bump into another woman.
"Sam, what's going on?" The woman asks, I push past her as well, going to go outside but Sam stops me.
"This is [Name], Bella's sister. And what's going on, why are you freaking out?" He questions me, I grow antsy, not wanting to answer him as I was just trying to find my sister. "[Name], what's going-" "Bella, where is she?" I glare at him. "You said you guys were gonna keep her safe, she was supposed to be at the house, where is she?" I start to grip back on his arm, visibly hurting him but I was not doing too goof. "It's okay, she was was just here." Sam attempts to calm me down.
"Yeah, she was looking for Jacob." The girl speaks up, I glance back at her. Then something comes back to me. The cliff. She wanted to cliff dive. "Thank you!" I point to the random woman I've never seen before.
Speeding out of the house, practically ripping my body out of Sam's grasp.
Arriving at the Cliff I look around, seeing Bella's truck parked. I hurry towards the water, Bella's body was falling to the water. "Bella no!!" I scream. She hit the ocean.
"Bella!" I cry out. Moments pass and then her body pops out. A huge relief settles in my body. Panic still over washed my face nonetheless. "Yes!" She laughs. Then a wave crashes over her, pulling her under the water. Without thinking I dive into the water once I hit the water I open my eyes, searching for Bella.
It takes longer than I liked but once I found her, her eyes were closed. I just barely grab her by her sleeve, once I have her I fix my grip to her waist. Swimming out of the water, making sure her head is above it.
Getting onto shore I try to remember what to do. I hear footsteps behind me as I begin CPR. "Oh my god, Bella." It was Jacob behind me, he gets down to his knees as well on the other side of her.
"Bella, please." I beg with her, dread entering my body. Jacob and I lift her torso up, hitting her back. Finally she spits out water.
"Bella!" "Bella can you hear us?" Jacob asks. "[Name]...? Jake?" She's attempting to focus on us, mainly staring at me. Sam stands behind us. "She'll be alright." He tells us, I stand up letting Jacob lecture her as mine will be far far worse.
I go over to Sam.
"Sorry..." I mutter. "Sorry?" His eyes widen slightly, surprised I'm talking to him to begin with. "For pushing past you, searching your house." I say, holding myself. Weirdly just now feeling the water drip from my clothes.
"Who was that girl?" I suddenly ask as he stayed silent after my apology. "That's Emily, Paul's imprint." He informs me.
I nod my head a little bit. "Oh," Was all I said in return before joining Bella and Jacob again.
"Get them home, I'm heading to the hospital, I'll meet you there!" Sam shouts over to Jacob who only nods in return. Sam jogs off.
"Why would you jump? Didn't you notice it's like a hurricane out here? You're lucky [Name] got here in time." Jacob turns back to my sister. "I know. It was stupid- Sam said hospital- someone's hurt?" She asks and then I realized what was said too and we both stare at him waiting for an answer.
"Harry Clearwater had a heart attack." He informs us. I close my eyes, knowing that's going to be heartbreaking for our dad. "Oh my god- does our dad know?"
"He and my dad are both over there." He says. "Will Harry be okay?"
"I don't know. Come on. I'll find you both something dry and drive you guys home." He tells us, helping my sister up. She then falls into my arms and we walk together as I hold her from the side.
Jacob both found us jackets but it was kind of irrelevant for me as I don't feel cold. Bella shivers though so Jacob pulls her close.
"Hundred and eight degrees over here." He smiles, she tucks herself further into him. "Must be nice, never getting cold." She says to the both of us, mainly to Jacob so I stay quiet. "It's a wolf thing." He shrugs it off. "It's a Jacob thing. You're just... warm." She compliments him. "Like the sun." He grins.
I roll my eyes from the subtle flirting he's trying to pull off. "Like the sun." Bella repeats him.
"Which like always comes back. You can count on me." He sincerely tells her. She only nods though. I feel her grow awkward. "There are other cool things about all this, like- I heal fast. Wanna see me stab my hand?" He jokingly messes with her. "Yeah, 'cause that would be fun." She sarcastically responds.
Jacob pulls the truck into our house. "So... this wolf thing's not all bad?" She changes the subject, I still decide to stay quiet. I feel tired almost which is weird but ignored like everything else has been. "It's better. Not that you know. But..." He grows quiet. "But..." She says, egging him on to continue. "It's just... comes so easily to me. More than the other guys."
"That's a good thing, isn't it?" She tilts her head.
"Maybe. Or maybe it makes me less human than the others." I notice him glance at me then back to Bella. It was quick, not exactly intentionally but I saw it.
"Sometimes I'm scared I might disappear, you know? Who I really am." Bella looks him directly in his eyes and this where I take it as a sign to get out of the truck.
They of course noticed it due to Bella's truck being so nosey but they continued with their conversation. I leaned against the truck, wanting to wait for Bella before I went into the house. I closed my eyes thinking about how Bella might not have made it. Moments later Bella opens her truck door but Jacob pushes her back into the trucking slamming her door before grabbing me and leading me back into the vehicle as well. "There's a bloodsucker out there." He says.
"Hey! Excuse me!" I motion to myself, I get a quick apology but then I notice the sense of another as well. "How do you know?" She questions. "He can smell us. Wolves and Vampires have distinct smells." I tell her.
"Yeah, and they reek. Sorry [Name] but it's true. And I'm getting you guys out of here." He pulls out of the driveway, whipping the truck around. "It's not Victoria!" I shout. And both Bella and I look in the driveway again. Realizing who it is. "Yeah, stop, it's not here!" Bella screams.
"Forget it." He shakes his head.
"It's Carlisle's car! They're here. Go back!" Bella orders him but he doesn't listen. "It's a trick-" He floors it so I take Bella, opening the door and jumping out causing Jacob to slam the breaks. I try to careg Bella bridal style, going to run off to the house but Jacob gets in front of us. I slowly put my sister back down. "Stop, you guys gotta come with me." He desperately says to us.
"It's okay. They're my friends." Bella argues. "Jacob something might be wrong if they're back." I plead with him. "Don't you get it? If a Cullen is back here, this is their territory. The Treaty says we can only defend our own lands." He explains to us.
"It's not a war." Bella disagrees. "It is. And you'll only be safe in La Push. I can't protect you here anymore." This isn't about me anymore. I'm only plus one because I'm Bella's sister.
"I don't need you to-" "You're about to cross a line." He cuts her off. "Only if you draw one." Bella states. We begin to move past him but he stops us. "I'm not letting you two do this." He says.
"You don't have a choice. We- I don't belong to you." She says, knowing it will hurt him, and it does. She sees it but she knows she can't take it back. He hands her the keys. "Bye, Bella. I hope you both don't die." Bella flinches from his words, he disappears in the woods. Leaving us in the road so I take the keys from her. Grabbing her arm so we can continue our way to the house.
But as we begins rustling noises start. She freaks out but I smell the scent of who it is and I instantly let Bella go. She screams though, stopping once she sees who it is. "Alice!"
"You're... alive." Alice seems confused. I stand back, completely silent at the sight of her. Bella hugs her. "Oh my god, Alice. You're here." Bella grins. "I heard voices- I didn't think it was you two but- you're alive." She repeats herself from the first time. "You keep saying that." Bella chuckles anxiously.
"I saw you- a vision of you- you jumped off a cliff. I knew I'd be too late but- Why the hell would you try to kill yourself?!" She suddenly grows angry. "I didn't I was cliff diving." Bella corrects her.
"Why?!"
"Um... fun?" Bella even questions it herself, knowing her answer isn't a good one. "That was fun for you." Alice looks her up and down. "Until I hit the water." She nods. "I have never met anyone more prone to life-threatening idiocy... and what is that hideous dog smell on the both of you?" Oh so she can acknowledge my existence.
"Oh, probably Jacob. He's kind of a werewolf."
Masterlist
A&J M.L.
I am sorry for the weird ending of this chapter. Also I obviously switched up Paul and Sam to go with my story lol.
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milksnake-tea · 8 months
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hii, may i request platonic blade with prompt 7 and dialogue 10?
❀ ˎˊ- prompts: It's been years since you've passed, and yet they still talk to your grave as if you're still there. + "I didn't know where else to go" ❀ ˎˊ- 1k followers event ❀ ˎˊ- character: blade ❀ ˎˊ- warnings: readers dead :( also angst ❀ ˎˊ- a/n: unrelated but i love it when the readers dead LMAO okay ngl did not know what i was doing w this one but YAY :D
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Blade was unfamiliar with graves.
He knew death like the back of his hand, and yet, he never knew of what came after it. Funerals were rare on the Xianzhou, and even after he'd left the Luofu, he never truly stayed to see what had come of his victims.
So that is why when he returns to this planet, and he finds himself at your grave, he doesn't know what to do.
Truthfully, though, who would? What would one do, when at the grave of someone lost to time?
Quite ironic, to be honest. As a (former, he remembered bitterly) short-lived species, Blade had always imagined that he'd be the one in the grave, with one of his past friends standing where he was now. But now, in this undying body, he had no choice but to take on the burden of survivor.
He let out a quiet sigh, kneeling down on the dirt that lay as your eternal resting ground. Gently, he laid down a bouquet of red spider lilies - the customary flower for a funeral.
He opens his mouth, but nothing comes out.
Should he say something?
Most people would.
But what would Blade have to say? His missions were always bloody and boring (Kafka was a better storyteller than he), and he rarely did anything outside of combat.
His eyes trail down the grave, silently reading your name. He remembers when it was the name of a friend, the name of someone he would look back on with fondness. The name of a person who would lightly scold him for his actions, yet always provided him with food if he needed it.
He sighs once again. Kafka was waiting for him - he had to make this quick.
"I apologize for disturbing you," he began, but immediately chastised himself. You hated it when he apologies for menial things (although he wouldn't consider this menial). "We had a mission here, and... I didn't know where else to go."
He looks up towards the sky. It's sunny today, so unlike the cloudy skies under which you died. He wonders if you're happy now, walking among the paradise beyond.
If anyone deserved that paradise, it would be you.
"I don't know what to do," he admits quietly. "I never thought that I'd return."
Only a silence greets him.
"Are you happy?" he asks.
Your grave doesn't respond.
Blade blinks, tilting his head.
"I would hope you're enjoying yourself," he says, standing up. "I would like nothing other than to join you, but I cannot leave just yet."
He begins to turn away, his eyes lingering on your grave one last time before he leaves to join Kafka and the others.
"Wait for me. I will be back."
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reblogs w comments are appreciated !!
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