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trblsvt · 1 year

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for the books | jeon wonwoo

summary | wonwoo's students seemed intent on matching him up with a fellow teacher. he didn't really want to stop them, it was too funny for him to break up their fun. plus, he didn't mind the certain someone he was being "set up" with. genre | fluff, teacher!au warnings | none, i think let me know! word count | 2.2k words pairing | jeon wonwoo x fem!reader min | lowercase intended i literally put off my other works to write this! delulu era to the max! i advocate for women in stem!!! also! this is like an american high school-level setting. lily is so out of pocket LOL (believe it or not there is a girl just like her at my school). this was 100% self-indulgent

"mr. jeon!" his student lily called. "so you're telling me that after all that, she still hasn't kissed him?" he looked up from his desk and looked over to his obviously distraught student. "lily! i didn't even finish it yet!" her friend mina yelled at her.

"i'm sorry! it's just so crazy how they didn't even kiss! even after they made up and he said all of that to her!" lily huffed.

"what did he say to her? i haven't gotten there yet either," daniel piped in.

"just read it! i'm sorry i brought it up in the first place," lily sighed and pulled out the worksheets she was supposed to complete after reading the book. he shook his head and went back to inputting grades into his computer. it was silly to think lily was just going to do her work. "mr. jeon, do you have a girlfriend?" she asked putting her pencil down. he paused momentarily, fingers hovering over the keyboard. "dude, that's so not cool for you to ask mr. jeon," daniel complained.

"what? we're reading this romantic novel, is it not fair to ask our english teacher if he's in a relationship?" lily replied, crossing her arms. "i mean we have to be reading this book for some reason."

"maybe it's just a part of the curriculum," mina rolled her eyes.

"do you seriously think mr. jeon is sending us subminimal signals about his love life through the books we're reading?" daniel asked.

"i don't know! maybe!" lily said. the three of them continued to argue back and forth at their table. wonwoo should probably stop this before the other students get irritated with the trio. "guys, i can assure you, i am not sending any messages about my love life. please get back to your work," wonwoo cleared his throat. he heard a disappointed noise, but pencils went back to scratching and pages started flipping again. soon it was the end of the class period and everyone was packing up. it was just lily. "next time, please refrain from asking personal questions in class," he asked.

"yes, of course. i'm sorry mr. jeon," lily bowed her head.

"it's alright. it can just be a bit distracting for your classmates. let's try to be more considerate."

"will do," she said, turning on her heel.

"oh and lily, just between me and you," wonwoo paused. "i don't have a girlfriend."

"he said he wasn't in a relationship!" lily cheered. daniel stared at her baffled, "didn't he say not to tell anyone?"

"yeah, but i mean, he must know that i'm going to tell you guys. you guys don't seem as nearly as excited about this as i do."

"why would we be? he's single, it's not like you have a chance with him or something," mina commented.

"no! ew! i would never try to go after a teacher, are you crazy? i'm saying that this is a perfect opportunity for us to get mr. jeon a date!" lily practically squealed.

"a date? with who?"

"with miss ___, of course! who else? haven't you guys ever noticed that they spend almost every lunch period with each other? they're so cute together!"

"maybe they're just planning classes or something," daniel shrugged.

"um, hello? mr. jeon teachers english literature and miss ___ teaches physics b. what would they planning together?"

"touché."

"i think it's time to enact a master plan."

"so everyone understands this equation, right?" you said, turning back to face the class. "tell me now, so i can help. this equation is the very foundation to magnetism, if you don't get it now i can't promise you'll do well in this unit."

no one put their hand up. you smiled, "oh well, i guess we just have a bunch of physic masters in this class. but seriously, let me know if you need help. you can start working on your homework packet now, this way if you have questions you can ask them now. i don't need your frantic emails at midnight."

you returned to your desk and flipped through some lesson plans. you didn't get to finish eating lunch today, so you took out your lunch bag. a small slip of paper fell out of it and onto the ground. you smiled to yourself and reached down to pick it up. "miss ___!" your student lily said, she was standing at the foot of your desk.

"yes, lily?" you answered.

"i have a question about something."

"have at it."

"it isn't physics related though." you looked up, slipping the slip into your pocket. "then, what's it about? do you need to go to the nurse?" you frowned.

"no it's nothing like that, but i was told by another teacher not to ask questions like this in front of the whole class. he said it was inconsiderate," she shrugged.

"oh, um, well i guess you can go ahead."

"are you friends with mr. jeon?"

you froze. mr. jeon? as in english literature teacher mr. jeon? mr. jeon you eat lunch with him every day mr. jeon? maybe they started picking up on something. "well, yeah, i guess you could say that," you coughed. "why are you asking this all a sudden?"

"well, i came by mr. jeon's class before lunch to ask him about an assignment and i saw you there. i didn't want to interrupt, but i didn't know you guys were friends," she shrugged, averting her eyes.

"oh well, yes. mr. jeon started at his position around the same time i did a few years ago. so we got close because of that."

"that's so- i mean, i'm sorry to pry. i was just curious. i mean usually i don't see english teachers and physics teachers talk that much. thanks!"

the whole exchange left you a little baffled.

lily seemed determined to get you and wonwoo together. she began to pry more often and she was getting bolder one question at a time. she even asked if you were in a relationship and if you got you cute gifts for birthdays and holidays from your boyfriend. sometimes she got very bold and mentioned mr. jeon by name. "miss ___, don't you think mr. jeon is cute? you two would be so cute together." you had replied, "i don't think this is time or the place to talk about this, lily. please do your practice problems." you rolled your eyes, "i don't feel like i'm at liberty to answer that."

you couldn't bring yourself to actually discipline her or her friends (who had seemingly joined in on the deep dive about your love life). they were curious teenagers looking for gossip. hell, you were like that too. you felt it would be unfair to punish them for that, as long as it didn't get too inappropriate, you didn't mind. it was a bit endearing too.

you just had to push the thought out of your mind. it was time to go to lunch anyway. it was the perfect time to clear your head.

"has lily been asking you some personal questions lately?" wonwoo asked, leaning back in his chair. god, he looked so handsome today. his glasses, pressed shirt, and ironed pants. "yes, has she been causing a raucous here too?" you asked, taking a seat at one of the desks.

"well, she asked me if i think you're beautiful," he chuckled.

you paused. you would be lying if you said you didn't feel anything for the man sitting in front of you. he was smart and kind.

"of course, i told her you are a lovely human being inside and out, and to get back to doing her project."

"funny, she was telling me that she and her friends thought we'd make a cute couple." he laughed at that, and it made your chest flutter. you loved his laugh. "cute couple, that's so cute," he gasped.

"yeah i know right. who knew our students would start trying to set us up," you joked. he nodded in agreement getting up after his microwave went off from the other side of the room. "it would be so funny if they actually succeeded, but it does seem a bit pointless at this point, right?" he noted.

"yeah, totally pointless," you agreed.

you and wonwoo, being set up, by your students of all people. it sure would be for the books if it happened like that.

what an absurd idea.

the rest of the week went as usual, uneventful, but you did get to see wonwoo on the way out of the building and into the parking lot. he held his leather bag in his right hand. "on the way out today?" he asked. "don't you usually do tutoring sessions after school on fridays?"

"we just started a unit, and no one showed up after the fifteen-minute window. i'm out of here," you laughed. he smiled. you loved it when he smiled. "want to walk out together then?" he offered and pushed the door open for you. something about him was so calming and comforting. you smiled and averted your gaze to the floor. even after all these years, he made you a little nervous. you did miss the way he grinned when he caught your shy smile. he loved the way you smiled too. he couldn't wait to see it again, he needed to see it again as soon as possible. he was too lost in thought about the way you smile and the way your voice sounds, that he fell far behind you. "___, wait up," he called as you made your way through the faculty parking lot. he jogged to catch up to you and reached out to grab your hand.

"i swear i saw him kiss her out in the parking lot," daniel insisted. "they were holding hands too!" at this point, lily was totally unmotivated to get her two favorite teachers together. not after miss ___ shut her down on numerous occasions and mr. jeon was just as friendly but unbothered as ever giving his most PG answers. "whatever, daniel," lily huffed. "they would be so perfect together."

"he's literally telling you that they're together, he saw them kissing!" mina exclaimed. lily rolled her eyes. they were all hallucinating just to make themselves feel better that it was wishful thinking. "true love isn't real!" she cried.

"it's time to wake up, sweetheart," he mumbled. "you said you had lots of work to do today."

"yeah, well it's my day off too. i'll get to work later," his fiancé groaned.

"oh come on, i know you're desperate to do all that paperwork," he teased. he tugged on the warm body text to him to pull it closer to him. he loved waking up with his wonderful, beautiful, smart fiancé next to him.

he loved waking up next to you.

he knew the kids were asking about him and his love life. kids would be kids of course. "lily won't stop asking about my love life. it's funny since we both teach her," he said.

"i guess, she's never noticed the necklace with the ring hanging around my neck," you chuckled, nuzzling your face into wonwoo's neck. his arms easily wrapped around your body. he pressed a soft kiss to your forehead. "you know, lily asked me if i had a girlfriend the other week," wonwoo murmured.

"she asked me if i had a boyfriend too," you hummed. "i just told her that it wasn't appropriate to ask that in class."

"i said something similar, but i did tell her i didn't have a girlfriend."

you paused. why would he say that? he was very obviously in a relationship, well obvious to the two of you. he even gave you a ring and a nice dinner to cement your relationship. "i obviously couldn't tell that i didn't have a girlfriend because i have a wonderful, smart fiancé," he laughed. you breathed an internal sigh of relief, but you still hit him in the chest. "that's so stupid," you groaned. "you're catching everyone on a technicality." he thought he was so clever and funny, ever the wordsmith.

"it's so hard not telling the students," wonwoo whispered, and you nodded your head in agreement. he didn't know why the two of you didn't tell the students yet, but the relationship started a bit secretively, almost right after the both of you were onboarded. he guessed the two of you never got out of the whole secret relationship. it was a bit exhilarating keeping the secret between you and him, and the admin. he felt like a teenager again. "maybe we should ease them into it, but let's not let them think it was all them," you said.

"maybe it's time for you to start wearing the ring on your finger then," he commented pulling away to get a better look at you. "i can't wait for you to become mrs. jeon," he smiled.

"yuck, so corny," you rolled your eyes with a smile. "you need to stop with these cheesy sayings early in the morning." nevertheless, you leaned forward and kissed him. he kissed back easily, "come on, i know you like the little notes i leave in your lunch."

"i do, now be quiet and just kiss me."

"gladly."

he did have the whole weekend until he had to go back to school. at least you made the day a little better.

min | im just in a silly goofy mood LOL. my poor attempt at humor and portraying what high schoolers are like. wonwoo being an english teacher just makes sense!!! reblogs and comments are always appreciated! not proofread at the moment (it's 1 in the morning)

tagging: @a-wandering-stay

#seventeen #wonwoo #jeon wonwoo #svt #seventeen fluff #wonwoo fluff #jeon wonwoo fluff #seventeen imagines #seventeen x reader #wonwoo x reader #jeon wonwoo x reader #seventeen scenarios #svt x reader #wonwoo fic #jeon wonwoo smut #wonwoo scenario #wonwoo imagines #seventeen wonwoo #seventeen reactions

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neighborlystudios · 7 months

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・﹒・﹒・ why are ya avoiding me? [1]

Summary: You avoided him at all costs because frankly, he was an asshole, doesn't mean he avoided you though. He constantly flirts with you but you just take it as him trying to anger you. It works, but you start to feel like he's being serious, and you have butterflies in your stomach just thinking about him. However, he finally confronts you one day, and you don't know what to do.

Warnings: 15+, suggestive remarks, pet names

Pairing: Jax x GN!reader

Series: Part 2

Notes: I'm not proud of this writing at all, but I'll keep it as it is for you guys!

It was a normal day at the digital circus, as normal as one day can be in this wacky place. The adventure-of-the-day just finished up and you purposely made it so you weren't close to Jax at all, but he kept slithering into your personal space like you haven't set clear boundaries. You hate him, simple as that, regardless of how many times Ragetha claims that you must have a crush on him. The audacity. Jax is a bitch, asshole, shithead, he was terrible to everyone, who could like someone like that?

Well, despite making your status clear on the relationship between you to, he didn't get the memo- no, no, he just didn't care. At every single chance he got, that bitchass rabbit would flirt with you. It frustrated you to no ends because he obviously was just doing it to get a rise out of you and it was working. Every time you got upset, he would smirk and call you "cute", it set you off even more. Even though his body (and everyone else's including your's) was just a fake, digital avatar, you still found him somewhat attractive.

I mean who could deny that he was cute? His voice didn't do him any favors either, but it didn't get rid of the fact that he was a bitch. Every time you blushed at his flirting (which was shamefully more than what you would have liked), he would get closer and tease you about it. Pomni made it abundantly clear that you two acted like a married couple, which is so far from the truth.

So why did it feel different this time? Zooble was talking to you about how they never liked going on Caine's "adventures" because they were stupid, which is fair considering he only did it just to keep us from going insane from boredom and abstracting, they always felt like something that would be in a game for little kids. You tried to pay attention to her, truly you did, but your gaze kept moving over to Jax as he was conversing with Pomni about something you couldn't hear. You shouldn't be staring at him so much, why were you?

"You gonna tell him?" Her question caught you off guard. Tell who what? You knew exactly what she was talking about, however you chose to play dumb even though it won't work.

"Uh what do you mean?" You ask, head turning to her, feigning innocence as she sighed and rubbed her nonexistent temple, grumbling.

"Don't be dumb Galka, you like him even though you say you hate him. Everyone knows, I mean you look at him like you love him" Love him? As if! Far from it, you hate him.

"But I uh...I don't! He really gets my nerves Zooble! He wants to piss me off because its fun! That's why he flirts so muuuuch!" You whine as you look over to the one in question, but this time he stared back at you. Eyes widening, you quickly turn back to Zooble, however, its too late as he's already saunter over here like he owns the place with his shit eating grin loud and clear on his stupid face.

"Well hello there Galka, looking adorable as always" Immediately, you felt your face warm he flirts with you yet again, refusing to look back at him.

"Leave me alone @@#@$, what part of "don't come near me" is hard to understand?"

"Oh I understand fully. I just wanna know oooone thing" His voice pissed you off, especially when he spoke in that tone, one that reeked of smugness. Yet, butterflies erupted in your stomach as he spoke, his presence made you flustered, why? Out of annoyance most likely, only reason.

"Why are ya avoiding me, Cutie?" There it is, the elephant in the room that you refused to address and that stupidly cliche nickname that you loved from him out of his dumbass mouth.

"I'm not avoiding you, I'm just...coincidentally not around when you are" Shamefully looking down at the floor so he didn't see your face, you knew it was a weak excuse but it was better than accepting fate and saying nothing. That didn't deter him in any way as his feet popped into your field of vision. Shit, he is right in front of you. His arm came into view as his hand sat under your chin, soon lifting it up to meet his gaze, smirk ever present.

"Yeah, sure, likely story. Wanna explain why you look like you're having very dirty thoughts right now? Are they about me?" His statement made you scoff and step back, waving your hands to separate from him. The AUDACITY, again why was everyone claiming you liked him? How could you want to be with this person when he said shit like that?

"Oh please! In your dreams #%#@$head" Turning around, you started to make your way to your room, it was a bit of a walk but you didn't mind it. Plans sometimes were never made to be followed through as Jax appeared yet again in front of you.

"C'mon let me walk you to ya room at least" How did he know you were heading there? God he never fails to ask to be punched in the grion.

"I don't think anything here is going to put me in any danger #%@$ Bunny, leave me alone" You spoke firmly, not wanting any slips to happen, voice strong as you walked with a purpose, pushing past him to the one place that Jax isn't present. Well...physically at least. Ok maybe you did have a feeeeww pictures of the rabbit in there, but it was to remind you how much you hate him, yeah that's it. Nobody else knew because you never let anyone enter and since nobody else had a key, it worked out.

"Oh are you sure sweet thing? Don't worry your secret is safe with me of-" He holds your shoulder to stop you before leaning in close your head "all those pictures you have of me"

#jax x reader #the amazing digital circus #jax #tadc #tadc jax #the amazing digital circus jax #x reader

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theoddest1 · 2 months

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Hey, isn't it so..."Great" that Viv is out here liking posts that clearly find moments where Angel is being sexual with his rapist "Hot" How much more telling can this all get, right? We really sit here, having to explain how fucked up it is to take SA, try to tackle it "seriously" but then proceed to not even do it for that reason. Only for it to be for angst and goon material. How do you expect me to SIT HERE and take whatever Viv has to offer seriously? The number of people I have seen trying to justify this gross behavior is abysmal. If you have this kink or whatever, fine not like I can stop you, be into that shit somewhere else, but DO NOT try and TACKLE IT only for it to be not even seen as serious or as a way for you to get off to your sick fantasies.

Why the hell would you like this? "Angel with his abusive rapist boss😝, so hot guys! Can'tstop thinking about it!"

What good reason would Viv have in liking this post? Why do over 4k people find a post like this neat? "Oh they're fictional, it's gucci, stop bitching" wouldn't need to bitch if people didn't outright sexualize moments meant to tackle an irl fucking problem.

By the way, this person ships Angel and Valentino together. Their pinned tweet is legit sexual Val and Angel art. I wouldn't recommend attacking them regardless if you disagree with their ships and what they deem...ugh "hot."

Fair warning to I WILL be showing some of their arts and reblogs as evidence, so if you are not into that sort of thing (anything NSFW), I highly recommend scrolling past my post or past this section of it.

I'm pretty sure Viv actively searches for this sort of thing on Twitter, like it's PAINFULLY obvious that she does. How you just so happen to like a post clear af lusting for this abusive relationship YOU CLAIMED to take seriously that ALSO happens to be from an account that ships the abuser with the victim? Gtfo with your two-faced shit, just say your find this hot instead of lying your absolute ass off. The audacity for some fans to go after one group of people for liking questionable stuff only to let other questionable things slide. Like homie, you can let rape slide, but draw the line for any other questionable thing? How's about you have that energy for EVERYTHING with your hypocritical asses. Ion wanna hear y'all stank ass make callouts if you're okay with a rapist being shipped with someone he actively harms in various ways.

And Viv

You say this entire sequence is meant to be uncomfortable, meant to not sugar-coat how awful this situation is, and supposedly have people who are victims/survivors themselves, yet here you are liking posts from people who do anything but take it seriously and even sexualize it. That's absolutely insane to me. And reminds me how you were drooling over some pins that glamorize the abuse Angel and supposedly Husk goes through, you know, the same character that COMPARED his abuse with Angel's.

Ah yes, let's downplay how horrible Angel's situation is further, shall we? Let's especially do it after adamantly arguing with other SA survivors who "haven't seen the episode yet" and need to shut up or don't watch 😃. Let's ignore the fact that Husk and Angel's situations STILL aren't comparable but it's still very odd to have pins on TWO situations taken seriously in the show. So do you actually view the situations seriously or not Viv???

God she's....actually fucking stupid and horrid.

#vivziepop critical #vivziepop criticism #anti spindlehorse #anti vivziepop #hazbin hotel critical #hazbin hotel criticism #hazbin critical #hazbin fandom critical #hazbin hotel #hazbin valentino #hazbin angel dust

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pb524830 · 16 days

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more than that

pairing: paige bueckers x oc word count: 9.6k c/w: sexual content, language synopsis: paige and laila have been friends (or more) for quite a while. but friends with benefits can become much more than that. a/n: had this little puppy in the archives, and someone sent me an ask saying it's their birthday. figured i haven't put out something of this length in a while! want to preface this by saying i'm aware ivy's don't give athletic scholarships. also that paige is a little insane and a lot stupid. anyway, since it's the off season and we won't get basketball for a while, just trying to keep everyone fed. :)

“Five.”

“No.”

“Okay, ten.”

“Still no.”

“Fifteen?”

“Paige, what makes you think that going any higher is going to make me want to take you up on this bet?”

Paige wrinkles her nose, then shrugs. “Bro, I just have a feeling you’re very, very wrong.” I roll my eyes at her. “When have I ever been wrong?” I ask. It’s a reasonable question, with a very obvious answer. She points at me accusingly. “You got a 98 on your calculus test. You were wrong then.” I scoff. “Well, I’m not wrong this time. Coach Auriemma will one hundred percent not let me onto the bus for an away game.”

Paige pouts. She’s dressed in full Husky gear today, a gray hoodie thrown over a pair of sweats. Her hair is tied back in a bun, but the two front strands dangle in front of her clear, blue eyes. She’s seated next to me in the booth at a local diner, and I have a full view of her side profile; sharp jaw, upturned nose, high cheekbones, perpetual smirk. “It couldn’t hurt to try…” she mumbles, reaching for her milkshake.

I hold my hands up in defeat. I’m currently visiting Paige, and her, myself, and Azzi came out for a quick bite after practice. “Do whatever you want, Paige,” I sigh. She kicks me under the table. “You’re a bad sport. And if you’re so sure he won’t let you, then take me up on the bet.” Azzi groans and drops her head to her hands. “You two fight more than Paige and I do. Honestly, Paige, you need to quit forcing Laila up to Storrs for visits just so you can annoy her.”

Paige frowns at Azzi. “I don’t annoy Laila,” she protests, draping an arm around me and pulling me into her side. She smells clean, like soap and shampoo. “Yes, you do,” Azzi and I respond automatically in unison. “Well, I don’t know why you want to act like you’re not annoying. You do annoying stuff,” she tells me indignantly. I raise an eyebrow at her. “Like what?” I demand.

“Well, first off, you kick in your sleep,” she starts. My eyes widen. “Bitch!” I gasp. “You hog the blanket,” I counter quickly. She snorts. “That’s because you sleep in a ball.” I smack her side, inching out from under her arm. “I do not! I sleep like a normal person,” I protest. She settles her arm back around me and drags me back into her side, smirking at me. “Of course you do, Laila,” she says patronizingly.

“Anyways,” she says, turning to Azzi. “I’m not forcing Laila to come up here. She’s grown. She chooses to come visit me, even though I apparently ‘annoy’ her.” She jabs a finger into my side, and I push at hers. “Whatever. New Haven’s just boring,” I snipe. “Nah, I think you’re secretly in love with me,” Paige teases. I pull a face at her, but my face still grows warm and my stomach still twists.

The truth is, Paige isn’t too off base. The two of us have known each other forever, since high school. She played basketball for Hopkins, and I played volleyball for Wayzata. We’d met at our school rivalry game, and she’d pretended to hit on me off a team dare. The rest was history.

“... honestly, she should just transfer at this point,” Paige is saying matter-of-factly. I gape at her. “What, to UConn?” Azzi makes a similar face. “From Yale?” she demands. “From Yale?” Paige mimics her. “Yes, from Yale.” I drop my head to Paige’s shoulder, pulling out my phone. “Peace and love, babes, I’m not transferring out of Yale,” I tell her. She snatches my phone out of my hands.

“Who you texting?” she teases. “My friends, bro,” I snatch it back from her. She rubs her fingers along my shoulder soothingly, trying to catch a glimpse of my face. “Why your friends got you smiling like that, huh?”

“Paige, quit looking at my phone,” I mumble absentmindedly, grinning at a TikTok my teammates sent me. “Paige, quit looking at my phone,” she mimics again. Azzi throws a fry at her.

“Why not? You could come play volleyball here,” Paige complains. I shoot Azzi a look, like, ‘really?’ Azzi sighs. “I’m gonna get more ketchup. You deal with her,” she tells me. Paige glares at her. “I don’t need to be dealt with,” she says indignantly. “Anyway, you should transfer,” she continues, taking my phone away again. I sigh, looking up to meet her clear, blue eyes. “Are we actually having this discussion?” I ask tiredly. She looks appalled. “Yes, bro,” she says, as though it’s obvious.

“Paigey, why on Earth would I transfer from Yale?” She gives me another ‘duh’ look. “We have volleyball here, too,” she says. I blink. I always forget that Paige is this huge, superstar athlete, and that her sport will be her career. “Okay, but volleyball isn’t my future,” I remind her gently. “It’s just something that’s putting me through school. You know that.” Paige wrinkles her nose. “I always forget about law school.”

I laugh lightly. “I really wish I had that luxury.” Paige turns to look down at me, eyes roving my face, before she tucks a piece of hair behind my ear, her fingers nimble. “I miss you, though.” My heart stutters. Just friends, just friends, just friends.

The truth is, I haven’t been ‘just friends’ with Paige Bueckers in a long time. We met when we were about fourteen years old, and we got close super fast. A little too close. She was my first kiss. Well, we’d done a little more than kiss. But we were young and stupid, and we didn’t realize it was perfectly normal to like other girls. We hadn’t spoken of it since.

That wasn’t to say that I hadn’t thought about it. Of course I had. Every girl or guy I’d ever dated, I’d compared them to her. His hands didn’t feel as good on me as Paige’s did. She didn’t kiss like Paige. He didn’t sound like Paige, she didn’t feel like Paige. It was a vicious cycle. It took me a long time to admit that maybe, just maybe, I didn’t want anyone who wasn’t Paige.

I inch out from under her arm slowly, ignoring the flash of hurt across her face. Thankfully, Azzi comes back before I have to respond to what Paige said. “Is she done?” she asks me. I groan. “Is she ever?”

_________

“He said yes?” I ask incredulously. “Bro, Coach is my guy, I gotchu!” Paige crows, jumping up and down on the bed. “I don’t have anything to wear, Paige!” I complain. “You can just borrow my clothes,” she suggests. I give her an ‘are you serious?’ look. “You literally leave in an hour, I don’t even have time to do laundry-” Paige cuts me off by grabbing my hand. “Dude, it’s not that deep. We’ll figure it out. Just pack what you have, and we’ll go.”

“I have school,” I protest weakly. Paige shoots me a look. “You were supposed to be here a week anyway. Coming on the road is better than being in an empty apartment for two days, bro.” I wrinkle my nose. “I don’t know, Paigey…”

“Laila, please? You love coming to my games anyway.” I ponder for a moment, twisting my mouth. “I really, really want you there,” she says, softer this time, pulling me in by the waist and looking up at me earnestly. My breath catches. She smirks. “Fine,” I relent.

__________

The bus ride to Villanova is long and bumpy. I find myself falling asleep on Paige within the first thirty minutes of the ride, tucked into her side with an arm thrown around me, all under a blanket.

Every time I’m with Paige, I try my best to be present, and in the moment. Not just because I only see her once every couple of months, but because if I think about the future, I think about the past. Our past.

You could say I’m a masochist for crawling back to Storrs whenever Paige calls with an ‘I miss you’ or ‘Can I see you?’ You might say I’m weak. You’d probably be right. But with Paige and I… it’s different. It’s always been different. And if keeping Paige in my life means being in love with her in private, I guess it’s just something I have to put myself through.

I’m woken up by a soft noise in my ear. It’s Paige. She sighs breathily, frowning in her sleep. I watch her as her breath whistles through her parted lips, lashes fluttering. Her tongue darts out to wet her mouth. Then, she lets out a slight moan. And another, head tilting back.

I squeeze my hand where it’s resting at her thigh. “Paige,” I whisper urgently. “Laila,” she sighs, still asleep. “Paige, wake up,” I say, louder this time. I squeeze at her thigh again. Her eyes flutter open, lips still parted. Her eyes take a second to focus on me, before she rasps out, “Fuck.”

“What?” I ask, concerned. She shakes her head, leg shifting slightly. Suddenly, my hand is inches away from…

“Could you just… move your hand?” she asks groggily. I blink. “Why..?” I wonder aloud, before it dawns on me. My eyes widen. “Are you..?” She bites her lip, eyes trailing to the ceiling. And although I know exactly what’s happening, my hand doesn’t move. Instead, it inches to the waistband of her shorts like it has a mind of its own.

“Do you need..?

Her eyes snap back to mine, widened, the blues of them darkened by her pupils. “Laila, what?” She asks, voice still hoarse. It doesn’t help the fluttering in my chest. I hesitate. “I just… if you need me to, I can-”

She groans, her hand coming up to trail down her face. “You better be fucking serious right now, Laila.” I bite my lip, watching her jaw clench. “Do you need me to?” I ask softly.

Her response is quick. “Yes. Fuck, yes, before I change my mind.”

“Okay,” I whisper, dipping my hand into her panties and moving closer.

“Shit, you’re wet,” I mumble into her ear, dipping two fingers into her folds. She hisses softly.

My thumb finds her clit and I circle it lightly, watching her eyes flutter shut and her tongue dart out to wet her lips. “Is that good?” I whisper softly, pushing in and out of her. She’s so wet that they slide in and out ridiculously easy. I bite my lip as she nods quietly, brow furrowing. Her lips part as I go deeper, head tipping farther back.

“Shit,” she hisses.

I swallow hard. “Hush,” I mumble, looking around. The truth is, I want to hear her curse, and moan, and whimper, and whatever it is she wants to do. If I could fuck her, like, really fuck her, not on a bus…

I savor the thought, leaning next to her ear to whisper, “Open your eyes.” She obliges, eyes shooting open to rove over my face as I fuck her with my fingers. I bite my lip, pinching her clit hard, once, before plunging in deep. “I’m gonna-” she starts huskily, teeth digging into her bottom lip. I keep her eyes locked with mine, circling her clit hard before I feel her pulse beneath me, breath shuddering out as she finishes.

I work her through her orgasm, lip between my teeth. She doesn’t break eye contact, her blue eyes nearly blown black, eyes trailing between my own and my lips. “I forgot how good you were at that,” she whispers. I breathe out shakily. “You should go clean up,” I tell her, feeling a pit open in my stomach.

“Nah, let me get you first,” she says back, casual as can be. My heart stutters. “What?” I whisper. She leans closer, lips pressed against my ear. “I know how wet getting me off makes you,” she says, voice sultry and soft. “Paige-” I start wearily. She ignores me, reaching under the blanket to ease my fingers out of her. “Suck,” she murmurs. I huff lightly. She raises her eyebrows expectantly, and makes a ‘hurry up’ motion with her finger. I glance around, placing my fingers in my mouth quickly, then nearly groan at how good she tastes. I let my eyes flutter shut as Paige pulls my fingers from my mouth and places my arm under the blanket before she pulls my leg over her lap.

“Paige, you don’t have to-” “I want to,” she interrupts me, locking her eyes with mine. “Just shut the fuck up for a minute, dude.” I laugh breathily as her hand teases the hem of my shorts, fingers ghosting the inside of my thigh. “You think you can make me come in a minute?” I mumble, lips pressed against her ear. I feel her low chuckle more than hear it. “I’ve made you come in less,” she reminds me quietly, fingers sinking into me.

I gasp, squeezing my eyes shut, as she works me with her fingers, her thumb pressing at my clit. “Fuck,” I hiss as her fingers go deeper, curling ever so slightly. “Shhh,” she soothes. “Look at me,” she whispers. “I can’t,” I mumble into her neck, feeling my cheeks warm at the thought of watching her face as she gets me off. Her fingers find a spot that’s especially deep and I whimper into her skin.

“Come on, Laila, you can’t be making that much noise,” she murmurs to me. “Sorry,” I whisper. My eyes roll back when she circles my clit hard, once, twice…Then she starts talking to me.

“So quiet. Such a good girl.” I gasp lightly.

“Are you close?” I hum in response to this.

“You’re doing so good, I promise.”

“Almost there.”

“Yes, that’s good. You’re so good, baby, so fucking good.”

“Look at me, please.”

I pry my head off of her shoulder to take in her face. She bites her lip, eyes trained on my mouth. I part my lips ever so slightly. “I wanna watch you come,” she whispers. It sends me over the edge. I feel my orgasm shudder through me, soft and unassuming, but curling my toes, and my fingers that have somehow moved to the nape of Paige’s neck, sending my eyes rolling back into my head. Paige soothes me through it, patting my back, circling my clit, and it takes me a minute after she’s taken her fingers out of me and stuck them in her own mouth, before pulling me back into her side to realize what we’ve done.

I also realize that this is the first time in almost eight years of knowing each other that Paige has watched me finish. Whenever we… experimented, it was always with the lights off, drunk in the back of a car or in one of our bedrooms.

She’d certainly never called me ‘baby’ before.

Hm.

________

That’s when Paige and I truly went from friends to friends with benefits. Probably not the best idea, considering this long standing and apparently never ending crush I have on her. At first, it was just small things. At dinner, she’d put her hand on my thigh, and I’d excused myself to go to the bathroom. I hadn’t expected her to follow, but she’d pinned me against a stall door and kissed me to within an inch of my life. Gasping for breath, I told her we would finish this in the hotel room later that night. She’d made me come on her fingers again before forcing me to my knees to eat her out.

Tonight, we're back at the hotel after an afternoon game, a few of the girls chilling in mine, Azzi, Paige, and Aubrey’s hotel room. The hotel does have a pool, and I’m feeling particularly devious at present. I throw on one of Paige’s old Hopkins tees - it’s loose on me. Paige is six feet tall on a good day. I’m barely pushing five foot four.

I have on what has to be the world’s skimpiest black bikini underneath the shirt, and I shoot Paige a quick text before slipping out of the hotel room and heading up to the rooftop pool. Paige is out on the roof mere minutes after me, clad in black shorts and black sports bra. Shit, she’s hot. I catch the sharp angle of her jawline as she strains around, looking for me.

“That was fast!” I call. Her eyes land on me, and her hand reaches up to scratch her neck. “Shit, you said you had a surprise. Got me all excited,” she shoots back, sauntering up to me. “So, you gonna keep that on, or…?” she trails off, tugging at my shirt. I stand up, chest pressed to hers, before shoving her back a little, my hand grazing her bare stomach. “Get in first,” I tell her, smirking. She whistles, low under her breath. “Whatever you say,” she murmurs, licking her lips. She backs up, taking a second to slide into the pool with a soft splash. I walk slowly to the edge, easing her shirt off of me and tossing it to the side. “Shit,” she grins. “Have you always been this fine?” She swims to the edge, tugging at my calves to try and pull me in. I take a seat at the edge of the pool, her head between my knees.

She swims closer, spreading my legs further apart so she can rest her hands on my thighs, then inches them back to cup my ass. “You know,” she murmurs. “I didn’t have any dessert tonight.” I sigh, tipping my head back and leaning on my arms. “Oh, yeah?” I mumble. Her fingers pull at the strings of my bikini bottoms, nimbly untying them. She breathes against my bare cunt, and my head lolls back down to look at her.

Her face is pulled into a shit-eating grin as she licks a long stripe against my pussy. I groan out loud. “Fuck, Paige,” I moan, when her tongue dips into me, and her lips suck hard on my clit. “Oh, that’s so good,” I breathe, tilting my head back and letting her work at me.

“Damn, you look so good like this,” she tells me. “You think so?” I laugh breathily, meeting her eyes again. “Your tits,” she says, slurping loudly. I whimper, biting my lip. “In that top. Shit, you have no idea,” she finishes. She places wet, sloppy, open mouthed kisses all over my cunt, sucking hard at my clit, flicking her tongue at my entrance.

“You’re so fucking good at this,” I moan out, winding my hand into her hair to press her closer.

She laughs into my cunt, and the vibrations coax another mewl out of me. “I know,” she says, voice smug. I moan again, louder this time, before clamping my mouth shut. “I should probably- oh, fuck- be quieter… oh, my God, Paige,” I stutter, throwing a hand over my mouth. Her hands squeeze at my ass, and she looks up at me, eyes earnest, lips glistening with my arousal. “Why the fuck would you be quiet?” she asks, sinking her tongue in deep without breaking eye contact. Fuck. “Someone- someone might hear,” I gasp out. “Shit. I was lowkey counting on that,” she says. Then she smirks.

It sends me over the edge. My thighs quiver around her face, and I moan out, “Paige, fuck. Oh, Paige, yes. Don’t stop, please. Please, Paige, yes, yes, yes…” My back arches as I balance myself on my hands, throwing my head back as my climax crashes through me. Paige quickly ties my bathing suit bottoms back on as I catch my breath, then pulls me into the pool to connect our lips in a bruising kiss.

I smile against her mouth. “Your turn.”

__________

“Fuck, we’re late.”

I hear Paige’s agitated voice early the next morning, then feel her hands on my shoulder shaking me awake. “Laila, wake up,” she says, her tone urgent. I push myself up groggily, watching her shove our clothes into a suitcase. “What..?” I mumble. “We have to be on the bus in five minutes, or I’m gonna get my ass handed to me,” she replies. I groan. “Fuck. Why didn’t they wake us up?” I wonder, swinging my legs over the side of the bed and jogging to the bathroom to wash my face quickly.

I throw my laptop and chargers into my backpack and swing it over my back, tossing Paige the plastic baggie with our toothbrushes. The two of us rush to the bus, barely making it on. I volunteer to put our bags under the bus while Paige grabs us seats. When I climb onto the bus, I see Paige arguing in hushed tones with Azzi. “What’s going on?” I ask.

Azzi is snickering. “Just asking why these headasses didn’t wake us up,” Paige snipes. Azzi laughs even harder, elbowing Aubrey next to her. Aubrey grins up at us, looking like she’s also trying not to laugh. “Y’all had a… long night last night. We didn’t want to wake you,” she laughs. My cheeks warm immediately and Paige gapes. “Motherfuckers,” she mutters, taking my hand and leading me to the back of the bus.

“Use protection!” Azzi calls after us. I have to physically restrain Paige from lunging at her best friend by pushing her into the seat, and climbing over her into the window seat. “Behave,” I instruct. She makes a face at me, diving under the blanket to rest her head on my lap. Her legs dangle over the armrest on the other side, too long to prop up against the seat itself. I uncover her face, pushing the blanket away, and meet her clear blue eyes staring at me.

“What?” I ask, combing my hand through her hair. I part it down the middle to start a crown braid. She closes her eyes, humming. “Nothing,” she mumbles, sighing contentedly. I return my attention to her hair, braiding it away from her face on both sides, then letting it loose at the ends, securing the twists lightly with the rubber bands.

I look back at her to see her gazing at me intently, again. “Dude, do you want a picture?” I ask sarcastically. She smirks up at me. “No, I want to fuck you again.” My mouth falls open slightly and I smack her on the forehead. “Quit it,” I command, tone hushed, brows furrowed. She sits up, the blanket falling off slightly, and looks around us, checking to see who’s watching. “I bet the bathroom’s empty,” she sing-songs, tugging at my hand.

I pull my hand away, smacking her again, on her shoulder this time. “You are not fucking me in the bathroom of this bus,” I snap. Paige sighs, leaning back and spreading her legs. For some reason, the way she sits really does something to me. I tear my eyes away and curl up against the seat, focusing on the air above her. “Actually, you’re right,” she starts, placing a hand on my thigh. My eyes shoot to hers, and her hand squeezes, fingers long enough to span my thigh and wrap around partially. “Right about what?”

She shakes her head, licking her lips. “I don’t want to fuck you in that bathroom,” she says, moving closer. She places a feather-light kiss on my jaw, then pulls away ever so slightly. “But I do want to fuck you on my bed,” she murmurs, then lands another kiss on my neck. My breath hitches, my hand landing on her stomach and bunching the fabric of her tee-shirt. “And in my car.” Another kiss.

I bite my lip, trying my best to act like this isn’t affecting me. “And in the shower.” This one lands on the corner of my mouth and my lips part unwittingly. “In the pool again would be nice,” she suggests smugly, squeezing my thigh again. “I’d take my time, too.” My breath whistles out from between my lips, and she plants a kiss on them before pulling away quickly. “How many times you think I could make you come, Laila?” she asks, breath whispering against my lips. “You’re a fucking tease,” I bite back. She grins at me, satisfied, and sits back, legs still spread wide apart. “It’s so funny how bad you want me,” she chuckles, closing her eyes.

For some reason, it hits home. And it reminds me that this is all just a game to her, that I’m pining after her like I have been for nearly eight years now, and that she just sees me as an easy fuck at worst, and a friend at best. The truth lies somewhere in between. This game we’re playing, that for some reason, I thought was a good idea - or knew was a bad idea and didn’t care - it’s dangerous. I can’t let myself get caught up in it.

“Fuck you, Paige,” I spit, then climb over her. “Yo, what-” I hear her confused protests and feel her hands catching at my arms. “Laila!” I hear her call, but I make my way to the front of the bus, plopping down next to Azzi.

“Pretzel?” she asks. If she notices my distraught face, she doesn’t mention it, and I’m suddenly grateful that I’ve known Azzi just as long as I’ve known Paige. I take the bag out of her hand gratefully, and I’m silent the rest of the ride home.

_________

“You have to fucking talk to me-”

“I really don’t.”

“Laila, it was a joke, I’m sorry.”

“No, this was a mistake. The bus, and-and the hotel room, and the fucking pool. God, I let you fuck me in a pool? That’s so unsanitary, Jesus.”

“Is that really your problem right now?”

“I don’t know what my problem is, Paige,” I spit, whirling on her.

“Maybe,” I hiss, “my problem is that you are not mature enough to be friends with benefits.”

She scoffs. “Oh, I’m not mature, huh? That’s what this is?”

“Yeah. Yeah, it is,” I tell her firmly. “Because now everything is about sex for you, isn’t it?’

“We both know that’s not your problem, Laila.”

“Fuck all the way off.”

“Obviously I want you, too. Otherwise I wouldn’t be following you to bathrooms or fucking you in pools or whatever the fuck else we’ve done. You’re being fucking stupid.”

“Do not call me stupid. And don’t psychoanalyze me.”

“Why not? Are you afraid I might find something you don’t like?” Paige’s tone is harsh.

“What could you possibly find?”

“That maybe you like fucking me!”

“Fuck off!”

“You like fucking me, and you’re not mature enough to admit it. We both know that’s it. And now you’re running away, because you do that with all your fucking problems.”

“Fine. I like fucking you. Is that what you wanted to hear?” I snarl, throwing a tee-shirt at her.

Paige’s eyes go dark and she stalks towards me, shoving me against a wall by my shoulders. “Was that so fucking hard?” she demands. Then she crashes her lips to mine and I find myself moaning into her mouth, hands burying into her hair while hers roam my body, gripping my ass, spanning my back. I walk her backwards, shoving her onto her bed. “This is the last time I’m letting you do this,” I tell her, but I reach for the hem of my tank top and pull it over my head, anyway. She shrugs off her shirt, too, tossing it to the side, and pulls me onto her to let me straddle her waist.

“You’re all talk,” she mumbles against my lips, letting me push her onto the bed so that she’s lying down, and squeezing my sides when I kiss down her neck, sucking at her collarbones, biting at the skin above her breasts. “Are you going to fuck other bitches while I’m in New Haven?” I demand. “Maybe,” she shrugs. “Why do you care?”

“Don’t,” I snarl, gripping her ponytail tightly and pulling. She moans lewdly. “Fuck, okay. Yeah. I won’t.” I lower my lips to hers again, grinding my hips against her own. “Good,” I murmur. I climb off of her to wrestle out of my shorts and panties, dropping them to the side so that I’m completely naked in front of her.

She sits up on her elbows, drinking me in. “Fuck,” she whispers. I lean down over her, cupping her face and kissing her fiercely. “You’re overdressed, Paigey,” I remark casually. “Do something about it,” she murmurs back. I pull her to her feet and let her strip, too, biting my lip as she reveals her broad shoulders, toned arms, defined stomach, her long legs. I push her back onto the bed, and climb up to grind my wet cunt against her abs. “Shit,” I gasp, as her skin meets my clit. She adjusts our legs so that we can slot against each other, and I whine at the way her wet pussy feels against mine.

“Fuck, you’re so wet,” she mumbles. “Oh, God,” I moan, throwing my head back slightly, balancing myself on her stomach. “Feel good?” she asks, thrusting up against me. “Yes,” I mewl, moving my hand to her shoulder, the other tangled in her hair. Her hands move to my ass, squeezing, then trail up and down my torso, squeezing at my side. She takes one of my breasts in one hand and kneads it skillfully, tweaking my nipple. I meet her eyes, their blue irises challenging, and lean forward to take her breast in my mouth. They’re small, but perky, and I maintain eye contact with her as I place sloppy kisses around her nipple, licking at it shamelessly. She smacks my ass, grinding me down further, and I moan purposefully loud against her skin. “Fucking whore,” she says, but her tone is smug, her eyes glazed over with pleasure.

“Shit, you feel so fucking good,” she hisses out when I change the angle that we’re scissoring at. I have a higher vantage point, and I grind my hips down slower, using one hand to lift my hair and the other to squeeze at my breast. “Fuck, you’re gonna make me come,” I whine, knowing she likes it when I’m so vocal. “Look so pretty when you ride me like this,” she murmurs, squeezing harder at my ass. “You like riding me?” She asks, smirking. I cock my head, grinding faster, and her eyes flutter shut. “Do you like it when I ride you?” I counter, innocent as can be.

“Shit!” she gasps, and I feel her come apart against me, her pussy pulsating and dripping into mine. I grab her face, forcing her to look at me as she climaxes, and the blue of her eyes is nearly enveloped by the black. “Is that a yes, Paigey?” I coo. Her eyes roll back, body still shuddering. I’ve stopped moving my lower body, content with watching her finish. I push her mouth to mine in a punishing kiss. “God, I wanna record you when you come,” I whisper, and she laughs against my mouth.

“You got a filthy mind, Laila,” she teases, her voice raspy with exhaustion. Then her hands are gripping at my waist, and pulling me against her so that my back is pressed to her torso. “Filthy mouth, too,” she murmurs, lips pressing against the skin of my neck. My head lolls back against her shoulder as her hand trails downward down my stomach. “Oh, yes, Paige,” I moan as her fingers sink into me slowly. I spread my legs wider, and she pumps them in and out. “Yes, just like that,” I sigh. Her other hand comes up to squeeze my breast again, fingers moving faster, hand twisting my nipple. “Mmmm, fuck, don’t stop,” I tell her, biting at her earlobe.

I whine out as she pinches my clit, back arching. “Fuck, you like that?” she murmurs, doing it again. She plunges in deeper, faster, alternating between toying with my clit and fucking up into me with her fingers. “Yeah, you like that,” she answers her own question when I open my mouth and a moan falls out.

“I’m close,” I force out, gripping at her thighs. “You gonna fucking come?” she asks, pinching my clit again, but harsher this time. That does it. I shatter with a scream: “Fuck, Paige!” and she coaxes me through my climax as it crashes through me, fingers circling my clit. I collapse against her, completely spent but completely satisfied.

I feel her laugh reverberate against my back. “And you were tryna tell me you don’t like fucking me.”

____________

“Who is he?” Paige’s voice sounds loudly through my phone speaker.

“Girl, what? It’s three in the morning, who the fuck are you talking about?”

“This dude in your post. He’s touching all up on you. Who is he?”

“What post, Paige?” I mumble groggily.

“Instagram, bro, keep up.”

“I promise you there is no one groping me on my Instagram, now go to sleep.”

“Hold up,” she tells me. I hear rustling on the other side of the line and I groan.

“Right here. Second slide. Guy’s got his hands on you and shit.”

I wrack my brain, too lazy to go look. “Is he blonde?”

“Yes. I know you got a thing for blondes-”

“Fuck off, Paige.”

“But you are so out of this dude’s league.”

“Thank you, Paige,” I mumble tiredly.

“I’m serious, who is this guy?”

“He’s from my International Turmoil and Conflict Resolution class, Paigey. His name is Luke.”

“Your what?”

“It’s a class for my major. Don’t worry, he asked me out and I turned him down.”

“He what?”

“Dude, keep up,” I whine, burying my head in my pillow.

“Did you fuck him?” she demands.

“What the fuck?” I shoot back, too tired to deal with her bullshit.

“I’m coming down there.”

“Huh?” Then the line clicks. She can’t be serious, right?

It turns out she is very, very serious. I’m awoken the next morning by a loud banging on my apartment door. My teammate Kara peeks her head out of her room and sees me running to open it. “Are you expecting someone?” she asks sleepily. “Not that I know. I got it, though,” I tell her.

I open the door to a very frazzled and tired-looking Paige Bueckers. She holds her car keys in one hand, and her backpack is balanced on one shoulder. Her hair is down, and she’s dressed in a muscle tee and sweats. I blink, then gape. “Can I help you?” I demand.

She shoves into my apartment, dropping her backpack and keys on my counter before taking my face in her hands and swallowing my lips with hers. I gasp lightly, and she slips her tongue into my mouth. “Fuck, I missed you,” she groans. I let her back me towards my room, lips still devouring mine. “Do you always look this sexy in the morning?” she mumbles against my mouth, opening the door to my room. She pushes me onto the bed, towering over me.

I recover from my shock at this point, and place a hand on her stomach to halt her. Her muscles contract under my fingers as she catches her breath. “Paige, what are you doing here?” I pant out. She weaves her hand into my hair, pulling me back by my scalp before smirking at me. “I already told you. I missed you.” I raise an eyebrow. “You drove an hour because you missed me?” I demand. She leans down, ghosting her lips over mine again. It takes everything I have not to pull her to me and kiss her senseless. “I drove an hour to fuck the shit out of you, but you’re holding me up.” I shove her away, huffing. “You cannot just show up-”

“Would you have said no?” she counters reasonably, plopping next to me and pulling me into her. I hesitate. “Well, no, but-” “Exactlyyy,” she crows. I shove her away again, standing up. I tug at the hem of my shirt (her shirt, fuck me), pushing the waves of my hair up out of my face. “You’re wearing my shirt,” she observes, sitting criss-cross. I frown at her. “And?” She grins. “I want it back.”

I feel myself getting really pissed now. “You’re not funny,” I bite. She leans back on her hands, eyes roving up and down my body, her bottom lip tucking itself under her teeth. “A’ight, leave it on then,” she says, her voice low. I run my hands through my hair again and scoff. “Dude, what the fuck?” I snap. She looks taken aback. “You think you can just show up here and-and get in my pants? What’s wrong with you?” I demand, my voice rising.

Paige blinks. “You want me to buy you coffee first, or..?” I groan, covering my face with my hands. “No, Paige, I want you to be fucking normal.” She pulls a face at me. “What do you mean, normal?”

I pace in front of her, crossing my arms, then uncrossing them. “We were friends before this, Paige. And we did normal friend stuff.”

“This is normal friend stuff.”

“Are you fucking joking?”

“I’m deadass.”

“This is not normal friend stuff. Are you high?”

“I wish.”

“Do not get cute with me right now.”

“I don’t know why you’re acting like you’re not the one who started this.” Paige’s tone is cold.

“Excuse you?”

“Maybe my memory’s a little off, but you’re the one who offered to finger me on the bus, right?”

“Because I thought you could handle it. This is supposed to be friends with benefits. That means we keep being friends. And we watch fucking movies and go to fucking parties, and you treat me like you’ve treated me for the past eight years, Paige. I’m not just some fuck-buddy”

“Well, I’m sorry, Laila. I’m so fucking sorry that I can’t treat you normally, because the second I see you, my brain goes blank. All I can think about is fucking you. I’m sorry that the second I thought someone else had their hands on you, I couldn’t see straight-”

“You don’t own me.”

“You’re still mine.”

We’re chest to chest at this point, breathing hard. Her eyes are locked on mine.

“What are you saying, Paige?” I whisper.

Her eyes dart away. She licks her lips. “Paige?” I push.

“I’m sorry, Laila,” she whispers, eyes darting back to mine. “I should’ve stayed in Storrs.”

Then she’s walking out of my room, and I’m chasing her into the hallway, watching her grab her bag and her keys and walk out of my apartment door.

I cry so hard that night that my head hurts.

_________

“Laila, you have to come out of there.”

I suppose I should show some appreciation that Azzi and Ice drove all the way from Storrs to see me. “No, I don’t!” I call back. “You have to eat, at least.” Azzi sounds tired. “I have a lifetime supply of hot chips in here.” “That is not real food!” Azzi exclaims. The truth is that my eyes are too puffy and my head hurts too much from crying to leave my room right now.

“Please, just talk to us?” Azzi pleads. I hesitate. “Okay. Come in.” I hear the door click open, and shift in bed to watch the two of them file in. Ice takes one look at me and immediately takes a seat on the bed, pulling me into her. I feel my eyes well up with tears again. “What happened, baby?” she asks, rubbing my side soothingly.

I sniffle. “Nothing. I just hate,” I hiccup. “Fighting with Paige.” Azzi rolls her eyes. “What did she do this time?” she demands. “She didn’t d-do anything,” I say, voice hiccuping again. “She just, like, came down here… and then there was yelling, and…” I trail off, shaking my head as tears drip down my face. “What are you guys even doing here?” I ask, my voice choked. “You have to have practice or something.”

Azzi plops down on the other side of me. “You are important to us,” she tells me gently. She hesitates. “And Paige isn’t doing too hot either.” I roll my eyes. “Paige will find some other poor girl to lure into bed.” They’re both silent. Azzi opens her mouth and closes it. “Laila,” she starts quietly. “Azzi,” I respond absentmindedly, picking at my nails. “You know that you’re the only girl Paige has slept with more than once, right?” I take a moment to register her words, blinking. “What?”

Azzi nods, squeezing my arm. “She’s not really too experienced in this area.” I snort. “She seems experienced enough to me,” I mumble sarcastically. Azzi shakes her head. “What I mean is, if she’s hurt you, or said something she shouldn’t have, she really didn’t mean to.” I sniffle again. “Well, what she said was basically that she doesn’t value me as a friend anymore and basically just sees me as a booty call.” “Come on, Laila, that’s not true-” Azzi starts.

I stand up, suddenly angry. “No, it is true. And it’s so frustrating because even before we started whatever this is, I still wanted to be around her. All the time! I missed her and her stupid laugh and her stupid fucking jokes. How can she not see that I’ve been in love with her for the past eight fucking years?!” I’m yelling by the end, breathing hard. Then I slap a hand over my mouth. Azzi and Ice’s eyes are wide.

“You’re… in love with Paige?” Azzi asks. “Fuck. No. Yes? Please don’t say anything to her,” I rush out panickedly. Azzi waves me away. “But you are?” I hesitate. “I… yeah. Yeah, I am.” “Oh, thank God,” says Ice. I blink. “What?” Azzi snorts loudly, then starts chuckling. Then the chuckling turns into laughter, and I’m even more confused than before.”Oh, God, you’re both stupid,” she gasps through her giggles. I cross my arms over my chest, glaring at her. “Explain yourself,” I bite out.

Ice is laughing, too, covering her mouth. Azzi finally calms down, wiping at her eyes and giving me a look. “Laila, Paige is head over heels for you,” she forces out, still shaking with mirth. I gape. “Are you high?” I demand. Ice butts in. “No, she’s right. Paige is so down bad for you it’s not even funny.” I scoff, feeling my chest tighten. “If Paige did like me like that, she would’ve done something about it way back in high school.”

Azzi cocks her head. “Didn’t you just say you’ve been in love with her for eight years?” I hesitate. “Yeah…” “And you didn’t do anything about it in high school, did you?” Azzi reasons. I open my mouth, and shut it. “Well, no, but-”

“You’re coming back to Storrs with us,” Azzi says firmly. My mouth drops open again. “What? No, I have school-” “It’s a Saturday,” Ice interrupts. Azzi crosses her arms. “We will carry you out of here,” she tells me wearily. I shut my mouth. “Just let me pack,” I mumble.

______

I’m sitting on Azzi’s couch, waiting for her to get back home. She had promised me that I wouldn’t have to talk to Paige until tomorrow before going to practice. Luckily, Paige doesn’t room with Azzi, so I would have no chance of running into her there. I’m watching New Girl on the TV, clad in one of Paige’s USA Basketball t-shirts (I really need to buy my own clothes), when I hear the door click open.

“That was quick,” I say to who I think is Azzi, eyes still on the screen.

“Laila.” I freeze.

I scramble off of the couch, turning around. “Paige,” I breathe out. She looks awful, probably not much better than I look right now. Her eyes are swollen and tinged red, her hair messy and covered by the hood of her sweatshirt. Her cheeks look sunken in. “What are you doing here?” I ask, shuffling my feet before crossing my arms over my chest self-consciously.

She laughs hollowly, her eyes sweeping over me. “Feel like I should ask you that,” she rasps out. “Yeah, um, Azzi brought me up,” I explain. “Paige, are you okay?” I ask. “Me? I’m chilling,” she replies drily. “You didn’t respond to my texts,” I say softly, tracking her with my eyes as she takes a step towards me. I stay planted.

“Was tryna give you your space,” she murmurs, moving even closer. “What’s going on with you, Paigey?” I ask, concern lacing my tone. She’s inches away now. “I wish I could tell you,” she breathes out. “Let me help, please,” I murmur, meeting her eyes. She licks her lips, her chest nearly flush against mine. “Do you have any fucking idea how badly I want to kiss you right now?” she whispers, eyes darting between my mouth and my eyes. My heart stutters.

She sighs, leaning her forehead against mine and closing her eyes, cradling my face with her hands. “Paige, please, just talk to me,” I beg softly. She shakes her head. “I’m not good with- with feelings, Laila.” There’s a hammering in my chest. “I just know that I want to be around you all the time. And it’s been that way since we’ve known each other.” Her breath is warm against my face, tinged with mint.

“Then in high school, we were, like… you were my first kiss. And I realized that I didn’t want to kiss anyone the way I kissed you.” “Paige-”

“And then on the bus, when you asked… fuck, Laila, I was dreaming about you. It’s always you.”

“Then it was just any excuse to touch you, to feel you, hold you, kiss you. I thought if it was just fucking, it wouldn’t mean anything. And I know it didn’t to you, but it did to me.”

“Paige-”

“You don’t have to say anything-”

“Paige, I’m in love with you.”

I watch her brow furrow, feel time stop, before her eyes snap open. Blue, clear, watercolor eyes.

“What?” she breathes.

I swallow, hard. “I’m in love with you,” I whisper.

She shakes her head. “Don’t play with me,” she whispers back, voice cracking.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. My eyes sting. “I’m sorry-”

Her mouth crashes to mine, kissing me feverishly. I respond in kind, throwing my arms around her neck, kissing her desperately. “Say it again,” she mumbles against my mouth. “I love you,” I gasp as she backs me into the wall. “Good,” she bites, nipping at my lip, shoving my legs apart with her knee as she continues kissing me hungrily.

She grabs my hips harshly, pushing me down onto her knee. My breath stutters at the sudden friction against my clit. “Not that I’m not enjoying this,” I pant. “But just to be clear…” She bites her lip, grinding me down against her knee, before attaching her lips to my neck. “Oh, God,” I whimper. “Yes, Laila, I’m in love with you, too,” she whispers against my skin. “Okay, good,” I laugh breathily, entwining my fingers in her hair.

Paige pulls back from me and I whine at the loss of contact between my legs. “How pissed do you think Azzi would be if I fucked you on her couch?” she asks. I raise my eyebrows. “Reasonably, very.”

She grabs my hand. “We’re going to mine, then.”

It doesn’t take long for us to ride the elevator up to Paige’s, but it feels like eons. The second we’re through the door, though, she has her hands on me again, tugging my shirt off. “Quit wearing my clothes,” she chides, tossing the garment to the floor. “You always take them off anyway,” I snipe. She places her hands on my ass, gesturing for me to jump.

I do, and she immediately connects our lips again. “Remember… how I said… I wanted to fuck you in the shower?” she asks between kisses. “Do it,” I pant, kissing her harder. It isn’t long before our clothes are strewn about her room and she’s shoving me into the shower, following close after. I run my hands up and down her torso, smirking up at her. Her body really is perfect, lean and long and toned. “Have you always been this fine?” I ask, mocking the question she asked me in the pool. She kicks my legs apart. “Do you ever shut the fuck up?” she asks. “Why don’t you make me?” I murmur.

She responds by smirking and swiping two fingers down my folds. I gasp, head smacking against the tile of her shower. “Shit.” She slides her fingers in easily, long fingers wrapping around my throat to bring my eyes back to hers. I whimper as she pumps her fingers in and out, thumb teasing at my clit. “Can you take another one?” she asks. I moan softly, biting my lip. I already feel so filled. “Yeah, you can. Take it,” she continues, adding a third.

I fall against her as her third finger stretches me out, gripping at her shoulders and groaning. “Holy, shit, Paige,” I force out, biting hard at her shoulder. “You’re doing so good, baby. Come on. Just a little longer,” she coaxes, pushing me back against the shower wall and cupping my face, drawing my eyes to hers again. “You gonna come? Gonna come on my fingers?” she asks, smirking. I shake my head, trying to hold back. “Come on, baby. Let go for me,” she coos, kissing me softly.

I moan into her mouth as my orgasm washes over me, and she swallows every noise I make hungrily. “So pretty when you come,” she mumbles against my mouth. I pant hard, pulling away from her to lean against the shower wall. “Shit,” I breathe out.

Her arms circle my waist, pulling me away from the wall and into her as she looks down at me. “Damn, I love you,” she says, grinning. I smile tiredly, reaching up to loop an arm around her neck and bring her lips to mine. “You’re okay, I guess,” I giggle, kissing at the corner of her mouth. Then I press a kiss to her jaw, her neck, her clavicle.

I wrap my lips around her breast and suck hard, tongue flicking at her nipple. Her hands find my shoulders as I drop to my knees. “You don’t have to…”

I cock my head, licking my lips. “But you’re so pretty when you come,” I say innocently, echoing her words. Then I sink my tongue deep into her cunt.

______

“Come back to bed.”

“In a minute.”

“Please, baby.”

“Don’t get cute. It’s not gonna work.”

“I’m cold, though.”

I throw a blanket at Paige. “There.”

She pouts from where she’s sitting on the bed. “You’re no fun.”

I place my pen between my teeth, typing a question out quickly onto my laptop and leaning down to scribble a note for myself hurriedly on a legal pad. I feel Paige’s hands land on my shoulders, soothing up and down my arms. She presses a kiss to my temple.

“You work too hard.” I shake my head. “Not hard enough.” The pressure of being in my junior year and about to apply to law school is really getting to me. “I think you need a break, baby,” Paige whispers in my ear. “Just lay down for a minute.” I yawn, scribbling another note to myself on a Post-It. “Okay, just a minute,” I relent.

I let Paige lead me to the bed and guide me to her chest, my ear pressed to her heartbeat. “I love how dedicated you are,” she mumbles, “but sometimes, you work so hard that it worries me.” I hum, feeling my eyes flutter as she inches her hand under my oversized shirt, rubbing soothing circles on my bare back. “Have to go… Harvard Law,” I say in between yawns. “Shhh… don’t put so much pressure on yourself,” she whispers. “You put pressure on yourself,” I mumble back sleepily.

“Nothing is worth your sanity,” she says firmly, stroking my hair with her other hand. I shift so that I can look up at her, smiling tiredly. I meet her blue eyes, fringed with long, blonde lashes. “You’re so pretty,” I smile up at her. I feel her laughter rumbling in her chest. “You’re tired,” she responds.

“No, really,” I mumble, letting my eyes trail over her face. I trace the tip of her nose with my finger absentmindedly. “Thanks, Laila,” she chuckles low under her breath, grinning down at me. My eyes flutter closed and she shakes me awake immediately. “Hey, hey, you gotta do skincare first. Or you’ll give me shit for it tomorrow,” she urges, rolling out from under me. I reach for her absentmindedly, then sit up, yawning again. Paige disappears into her bathroom, then re-emerges with my toiletry bag in hand. “You should just leave your stuff here, bro, I’ll clear a drawer or something,” she remarks as she walks towards the bed. I watch her lithe figure approach. “You’re, like, really tall,” I observe.

Paige raises an eyebrow. “You think so?” She muses. I nod thoughtfully, letting her wet a cotton pad with makeup remover and swipe it on my face, removing the remnants of blush. “I like that about you,” I say matter of factly. She wipes the pad over my mouth and I stick my tongue out at her, bringing my knees to my chest. She takes out the jade roller and begins applying serum to my face with it. I raise my eyebrows, a little impressed.

“Oh yeah? What else do you like about me?” Paige asks slyly. I tilt my head thoughtfully, wincing when she pats cold moisturizer onto my face. “I like your eyes,” I hum, tracking them as they rove over my face. “Your shoulders,” I say, my voice softer now. “My shoulders?” she asks, laughing slightly. I shrug. “You have a nice laugh,” I add. She fights a smile, closing my various containers and placing them back into the bag.

“Really? ‘Cause Azzi says I laugh like a horse,” she tells me. I pause for a moment. “Actually, a little,” I admit. “Oh, my God. Y’all are so fake,” she protests, smacking me with a pillow. “But it’s so infectious,” I continue indignantly, holding my hands up to defend myself. “Like, when you laugh, I want to laugh,” I say earnestly.

Paige wrinkles her nose. “You’re corny,” she teases, flopping back onto the bed. I scoot around to face her, sitting criss-cross. I grab the pillow from her hand and smack her with it. “I can’t help it,” I tease back. Paige looks down at me, inching her hand under her shirt and resting it on her stomach. “You want to know something?” she asks quietly, her blue gaze piercing.

I nod, shifting closer. “Promise you won’t freak out,” she says. Of course not.” She hesitates. “You know how… back in high school, we would, like, experiment? Or whatever?” I nod, urging her to go on. “I had a crush on you then, too,” she admits sheepishly. I snort out loud. Then I snort again, feeling a chuckle emerge, and then I start laughing. “What is funny?” Paige demands.

I shake my head, waving my hands in front of me in a calm-down motion, still laughing loudly. “No, it’s just…” I sigh with laughter, wiping at my eyes. “That’s funny that you say that because you had me with that stupid pick up line you used,” I force out, quieting my laughter. She raises her eyebrows. “No shot ‘you’re the only ten I see’ worked on you, Laila. That’s crazy,” she says, completely deadpan. I flop down onto the bed next to her, wiping away my tears and calming myself down.

“I probably just thought you were hot,” I admit, turning on my side to face her. She mimics me, turning on her own side. “Didn’t know you had a thing for white girls,” she smirks. I groan, smacking her as she pulls me into her by my waist, her arms wrapping around me and sneaking under my shirt again. “Do not put that on me,” I mumble as she presses her mouth to mine, feeling myself grin stupidly into the kiss.“You should have said something,” Paige whispers. I toy with the hair surrounding her face. “You should have said something,” I accuse. She scoots closer, pressing into me further. “We were so stupid,” she mumbles. I nod, laughing lightly. “I would have been with you in a heartbeat back then,” I tell her quietly. Her eyes flicker between mine, breath hitching. “And now?” she asks. I shake my head, biting back a smile. “I’m still all yours, Paige Bueckers,” I whisper. She kisses me again, softly, insistently. “Corny,” I hear her mumble again, and I laugh against her lips.

#paige bueckers #paige bueckers fic #wcbb #fic #uconn wbb #paige bueckers x oc #✂️ anon #ncaaw #fic talk

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vexwerewolf · 10 days

Note

why is it that we only have like two licenses from any mech producer that’s a good guy? For a game where like there are clear good and bad guys (even if who you play isn’t necessarily linked to that) it seems strange to me that the only loot and XP you get is… more benefits from the bad guys

I can tell you the answer, but to do so, we're gonna have to talk about a completely different TTRPG.

If you've read @makapatag's truly excellent Filipino martial arts TTRPG Gubat Banwa (and if you haven't, here it is), you may notice that every single character class description (with one notable exception) ends with one of these babies:

I am not Makapatag, and I cannot write with quite as much grace and eloquence as he can, but I will try:

If you choose to become a Lancer, ask yourself why you mock the name of peace with these weapons of war. You call yourself a saviour, but your steed was forged from the murder of a world. You stride across the sky in a colossus built in your own image, so why are you too cowardly to give it your face? Why do you believe these machines of death can preserve life?

It is important to note that the admonitions in Gubat Banwa are not just there to make you feel bad; they are there as legitimate questions. The Sword Isles have seen so much blood, death and tragedy. Wars are not glorious and killing is not a game. So, knowing all of that, why have you taken up this discipline - no matter how noble and virtuous it might claim to be - to shed more blood, to bring more death, to write more tragedy? What could possibly drive you to this? What need is so great that you must kill?

The thing with Gubat Banwa is that there are legitimate answers to these questions! There are bad people doing bad things, and some of them will not be stopped with words or kindness. Sometimes, as sorrowful as it is, killing is the correct choice to prevent greater suffering and deeper tragedy - but adding less misery and death to the world is still adding some amount of it. Even the most necessary wars will drench the ground in the blood of the innocent.

A sword is a tool meant to kill humans; while it can be used for other things, it is not well-suited to anything other than this. A mech is, in its most basic essence, just a very complicated sword: it's usually used on things larger than a person, but it's still a tool built to kill.

So why have you taken up this path? Humanity was saved from the brink of extinction and has created wondrous technologies like printers, cold fusion and mind-machine interface, and yet you use them to play soldier in a giant metal man. Why do you choose to take up this machine of death, built by the greedy and pitiless? Why do you think these machines can ever make things right?

Because sometimes, despite everything, they can.

Warhammer 40K shows an awful world full of monsters and monstrosity, and in the darkest moments of its history, Lancer's world looked just as bleak, but Lancer's world differs in one crucial way. Warhammer's world has long given up trying to be better, but Lancer's world never did. Lancer's world kept insisting a better world is possible, and it used what tools it had to make it so.

Sometimes the correct choice, no matter how bitter it may seem, is to kill someone. When you need to do this, a sword is a perfectly good choice for the job.

If you find yourself discomforted by the fact that all the people you can buy mechs from are corrupt and immoral - good! You have correctly engaged with the text. You have understood that the sort of people who would make giant walking death machines and sell them for profit are not good people. But you still have a job to do, and you need the correct tools, and those people have them.

Lancer is not a game about a perfect world - it is a game about a deeply flawed and imperfect one that does not let its imperfection stop it from trying. You have to try to make a better world, even with imperfect tools made by unpleasant people.

#lancer #lancer rpg #lancerrpg #lancer-rpg #gubat banwa #philosophy #ethics #ttrpg

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literaila · 1 month

Text

worth

gojo satoru x fem!reader

summary: the past comes back to haunt you, as it usually does.

warnings: angst, allusions to disassociation, hurt/comfort, mama is sad

last part | next part

year five.

"wait for me," satoru tells megumi, as soon as he starts walking away.

you're watching as megumi hangs his head, looking like he'd failed at his one objective--escaping--and turns around, glaring at satoru.

you've all been out shopping for the past two hours. getting the kids new clothes, shoes, whatever else satoru swears they need...

honestly, he's kind of cute running around like a maniac from store to store. showing tsumiki a cute dress she could wear, or teasing megumi into trying on a sweatshirt that matches his.

it's quite possibly the only reason you haven't complained.

or pointed out that both of the kids are on the verge of whining all the way home. or that he doesn't need to spend 100,000 yen to make them happy.

"hurry up," megumi tells the man, basically growling at him.

satoru grins and ruffles his hair, resting a hand on his back as the two of them begin to navigate through the crowd. mostly likely, neither of them knows where they're going.

you're not even sure where a bathroom is in this district.

"we'll wait here," you call out, nudging tsumiki. satoru turns briefly to give you a little peace sign, a little grin, and then he murmurs something to megumi you can't hear and they're both gone.

you're a little worried about them being alone together in this state but you ignore it.

"guess it's just you and me, miki," you say to the little girl at your side. she beams up at you, nodding. "do you want to sit down? how do the shoes feel?"

"mmm," she looks down, blinking at the sparkly shoes satoru insisted were perfect for her. "they're rubbing at my ankles a little."

"we can get some new socks, too. that should help. c'mon, i think there's a bench over there."

she grabs your hand as you begin towards the bench, humming something under her breath.

you look down to smile at her and don't notice the person walking by, accidentally bumping into them. "oh, i'm sorry, excuse us--" you turn and your entire body lurches away from you.

for a brief moment, you're not yourself. your conscious moves in an instant, ready to defend itself from everything, anything. you're not yourself, but someone else. someone you used to know very well.

"i--" you breathe, freezing at the person in front of you.

tsumiki pulls on your hand a little, confused when you stop suddenly. she looks to the woman standing in front of you, with a bizarre look on her face, and then tsumiki's brown eyes go back to you, her face riddled with curiosity.

"y/n?"

i don't remember a lot about her but i remember hugging her when she got home from work, and the way she said my name--

you want to forget it all.

it's clear now, several years later, that you would rather forget everything about her--about this woman standing in front of you, basically a reflection of yourself--than have to do this all over again. then have to face the memories of what she did to you. then put that child through any of it.

"hi--hey," you say because you have to.

here's the thing about seeing your mom for the first time in a decade: you can't just pretend you didn't.

you'd like to turn right around and walk away. you'd like to pretend that you've grown sometime in the past nine years, that you've turned into someone who doesn't need to stay and talk to her. you'd like to think that you're someone who can cut her right out of your life and feel all of the better for it.

but you're not.

you can't run away from your mother. you can't apologize for bumping into her and turn around with tsumiki's hand in yours and forget about it. actually, you can't even move right now.

because there's still this girl inside of you.

there's still this child, a teenager who tried so desperately to earn the approval of this woman and never got it. who tried so hard to be everything that this woman wanted, but could never try enough.

and she's clinging to your chest right now, breathing into your skin like a toxin, digging her nails into your heart and begging you to try again. telling you that you've got another shot, a chance she couldn't have--

so you can't leave now. not when you owe it to her, to yourself to try, to trick yourself into believing that it was just a fault of your own, that your childhood memories are only the result of some flaws you've already fixed.

you can't walk away when your mind is stuck on her, her, and--tsumiki.

your broken eyes turn to her.

your little girl who is standing right beside you, waiting for your next move. if you told her to run, she would. if you told her to stay by your side and say nothing, to hide behind you, she would. she wouldn't even ask you what was going on.

but for no reason at all, you can't tell tsumiki anything. you can't whisper to her that it's fine, that everything is fine. you can't introduce her or drag her away.

you can't do anything and it's never felt worse.

"i thought that was you," your mother says, tilting her head at you. she's staring like this is just a casual bump in. like you're colleagues who haven't seen each other since she went on vacation. "you look... grown."

you feel naive. there's nothing you can say to this woman to prove to her that you're better than you were. that you're far too good for her.

"thanks," you whisper, even though you know it's not a compliment. it's an instinct to appeal to her. to be polite and perfect.

your mom clasps her hands together. if you were looking at her--which you're not, you wouldn't dare--you might be able to tell that she's uncomfortable with you being there. almost surprised.

maybe she just assumed that you'd die as soon as you left the comfort of your childhood home. maybe she thought that they would've kicked you out of jujutsu high a day after you arrived, leaving you to starve on the street just like she did.

"well, how are you?"

you swallow. "i'm good."

she nods, and then she looks to your side and finally notices tsumiki there.

tsumiki, with her precious face, her beautiful brown eyes, and carefully organized hair.

you're not sure what your mother sees when she looks at her.

you wish more than anything that you could hide her. you don't want your mom's--you don't want this woman's eyes on her. you don't want her to say a single word to your daughter.

"and who's this?"

but you can't just send her away. you have no idea where satoru went, and tsumiki can't walk around on her own. not right now, not when you're so preoccupied.

you just can't walk away.

tsumiki holds her hand out, just like you taught her. "i'm tsumiki fushiguro."

"it's nice to meet you," your mother answers, shaking her hand warily like she's certain that she might get an infection from tsumiki's skin. and then she looks at you, not daring to ask what she wants to.

you clench your jaw, wanting to slap her hand away from tsumiki.

you should've put up a barrier a minute ago. the only possible block between you and a woman who doesn't deserve the pleasure of meeting tsumiki. who deserves no explanations from you.

but your cursed energy is frozen in place, and you know that if you shut yourself in, you'll never get back out.

"my daughter," you add, a bit louder now.

your mom's eyebrows raise immediately and she pauses, looking between the two of you, searching for some useless resemblance. like it isn't obvious that you share a bond, just from the way your hands are intertwined. like it's not obvious that you braided tsumiki's hair, or helped her pick out the shoes she's wearing.

like it might not be true.

still, she asks tsumiki, "how old are you?"

"twelve."

and you know where her mind goes immediately. thinking that it can't be possible. she knew you when you were twelve, and you certainly weren't pregnant with the little girl standing beside you. you certainly weren't developing any maternal skills locked away in your room, with only the curse that liked to hide in the walls to teach you.

it brings that resentment to the surface of your core, threatening to burst through your skin. you feel suddenly so angry you can't bear it.

and you're not that girl anymore, you realize. you haven't been since you met nanami and haibara and satoru.

since you learned that you were only a child and not a trophy that needed to live up to its name.

"well," your mom sighs, shaking her head. "i can't say this is what i expected."

"excuse me?"

"really, what do you know about children, y/n? don't you think you're a little young?"

tsumiki looks up at you with a frown, about to ask what she means when you stop her.

you squeeze her hand and look away, into the eyes of the woman who created you--who has that string of biology she just judged you and tsumiki for lacking--and still didn't care.

she is nothing if not the proof that dna means absolutely nothing.

"what do you know about children, mom?" you repeat, rhetorically. "at least i know that a ten-year-old shouldn't spend every hour of the day locked in their room, waiting for someone to come let them out."

"i'm shocked that you--"

"at least i know that a child is a gift and not a toy to hide away when you get bored of it."

your mom scoffs. "i can't believe this--"

"neither can i," you say and look to your daughter, who's got wide brown eyes and a confused sort of fear on her face. she doesn't need to hear anything else you have to say to this woman. you smile at her, soft as ever. "go look for dad, okay? he shouldn't be far."

it's been five minutes, and satoru's probably right around the corner, you rationalize. he's going to come pick up tsumiki and rescue you any second now.

tsumiki nods immediately, letting go of your hand. she turns to go do what you said, but before she can there's a strong hand on your shoulder, a body right beside yours, and you almost gasp in relief.

"found him," tsumiki tells you, softly.

you turn to satoru, wanting to beg him to carry you away from her, to get you away from her--but the words won't come. you're too struck by the view of his face, and the knowledge that when you finally escape from this, he's going to be right there.

satoru was there the first time, and he'll linger for the second.

his shaded eyes look back at you, observing for a second, reading your mind, and then he turns.

megumi is trailing at his side, holding a shopping bag. he looks between this stranger and you, a cautious look on his face.

tsumiki is telling him something without any words.

"hello," satoru says, smoothly, breaking the silence. "i don't believe we've met. do you know y/n?"

your mother frowns, scoffing. "i'm her mother."

you can see it when satoru reels back, looking between the two of you for a moment, an intense realization on his face.

maybe he can see the resemblance. the face that might be your own in just a few years.

or maybe, finally, he can feel the horrors of being raised by her. all of the things you've never dared to tell him.

you're pleading satoru for something with your eyes but you're not even sure what.

"there's another one?" your mom asks, almost disgusted, as satoru processes. "how old are you?"

megumi frowns. he walks over to tsumiki, who's already picked up your hand, and asks you: "this is your mom?"

you nod at him, relieved more than anything that he's there, with the rest of you. and that if you can't explain, satoru will handle it.

megumi considers it for a second. "are you sure?"

and you want to laugh so abruptly that it shocks you. you want to grab him by the face and kiss all across his cheeks.

tsumiki is already smiling at you like she knows this. her grip is strong against yours.

satoru smiles at your mom, a vicious ugly thing. "did you need something from her?"

"i--no, we just ran into each other," she tells him, seemingly confused by his entire presence. she looks at you. "who is he? another child of yours?"

satoru licks his lips. "not quite."

you're about to answer when he grabs your empty hand, shaking his head. "i don't think there's anything y/n needs to say to you," he tells her, coldly. then he looks at you. "is there?"

"no," you whisper, coveting the feeling of his hand in yours. the two children at your side, who know what it's like to be loved. megumi and tsumiki, who will never feel unwanted, as long as you have a say in it.

satoru nods, guffly, and turns. "it was a pleasure to meet you," he says, and he moves all of you away. you can almost feel it when he shields the three of you from the rest of the world.

with his hand in yours, the other in tsumiki's, and megumi on the other side of her, satoru leads you all away from her.

and you let him. because the three of them are more of a family--a better, safer one--than that woman ever was.

you can't thank them all for being there, being yours, in this moment, but you will.

at least you know that.

satoru has been watching you for hours.

since you all got home and the kids' questions began.

that was your mom?

yes.

why haven't we met her before?

i haven't seen her in a long time.

was she upset?

yes.

why?

because i'm happier than she thought i'd be, you said, i have a better family.

are we going to see her again?

absolutely not.

after that, the two of them quieted. satoru could tell that they had more questions, that megumi was curious and tsumiki was worried--but neither of them continued.

it was almost unspoken that you couldn't take much more. that you needed a break from it, even if you wouldn't say. so they both moved on, resuming their usual antics and talking about the clothes they got, when and where they'd wear them.

well, mostly tsumiki. but megumi entertained her thoughts for a while at least.

satoru just watched you. the tiny break within your eyes, the gap between you and the rest of the world. you've remained all the same since you got home. cursed energy small, unchanging. your face in one position like it'll kill you to move it.

satoru can't stand it, but he doesn't want to intrude. he doesn't want you to push him away too.

so he only sat there, trying to fill your role (which was impossible) at the dinner table.

and several hours later, after dinner, after space, satoru still hasn't brought it up.

but he doesn't get the chance to. because as soon as you've put both of them to bed--insisting on tucking them in and talking to them both separately tonight, like you're making up for something--you're sneaking into satoru's room.

and he's waiting like he always is. his arms are wide open when you walk into the room, and there's not a moment of hesitation before you fall into them. you don't blink or breathe before you're right against him, keeping yourself up with nothing more than blood and bone.

satoru hugs you close to him, trying to let everything he feels go, just for you.

(because he's just angry.

he's angry that she showed up and ruined your day. he's angry that he wasn't there to keep it from happening. he's angry that when he walked over he could tell there was something wrong because you were frozen--because you were almost barren. no cursed energy, no expression. nothing to draw him to you like usual.

and he's so angry that he can't do anything to fix it.

so angry that being the strongest sorcerer of the modern age means nothing when he really needs it to.

satoru isn't a person who hates. he never hated the people who attempted to tie him down as a kid so he couldn't escape observation. he didn't hate toji when he cut him through the throat. he didn't hate suguru for leaving, or yaga for asking why he didn't stop him.

he doesn't hate.

but he hates her.

for taking your face and twisting it around. for stealing your childhood and pretending like she didn't. for holding your precious heart in her hands and acting like it was nothing of value.

he hates her.)

you both sit there, rocking back and forth, sinking together for a moment.

and then you sniff, and satoru closes his eyes against your head, not sure what to say to make it all better.

what he can do to erase this feeling from your body. what he can do to prove to you that you're worth so much more.

"do you think i'm a good mom?" you whisper to him, as he moves back and forth.

his heart pauses, needing a moment to consider this. to not feel a fire in his soul at the very suggestion.

satoru pulls back, frowning. and he makes sure that your eyes are on his when he says, "there's not a person in the world who could take better care of them than you do," he swears, feeling like it's the most honest thing he's ever said.

he wants to brand the words into your skin just so you never ask such a ridiculous question again.

"thank you," you say, voice breaking, and satoru wipes the tears falling down your cheeks away. each one a different memory, a terrible moment where someone showed you that you didn't matter.

and when they continue to fall, satoru continues to wipe them away.

"do you want to talk about it?" he asks, almost hesitating. he's not sure that he can handle hearing about it--but he would if you needed him to.

"not tonight," you whisper and fall against him again.

satoru holds you close.

and he swears, to whoever is listening, that he'll love you enough to make up for that woman. he'll love you enough to make up for everything.

he loves you enough to be sure of it.

next part | series masterlist

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withlove-angel · 6 months

Text

How would they confess to you ?

(Luffy, sanji, zoro, Buggy, law)

Luffy

I think Luffy would be very straightforward with his confession, he wouldn't want to beat around the bush or cause any confusion. He would be very clear about his feelings for you and how much you mean to him. He might not be the most romantic person in the world but he would try his best to show you how much he cares about you and how important you are to him.

He might start by saying something like, "You know, I've been really enjoying our time together, and I have to say...I'm starting to fall for you!" Then, he might add, "Oh, who am I kidding, I've completely fallen for you! You're the only person who can make me smile like this and I never want that to go away." He might even end his confession with, "So, wanna be my treasure?"

Sanji

Well, Sanji might not confess right away, but he might start with subtle hints. He might drop little compliments or flirt a lot more. He would also make an extra-special meal to impress you. Eventually, he might get up the courage to tell you how he feels, and he would say something like "You're so beautiful and kind, it's hard not to have a crush on you"

That's true! Sanji does like to flirt, but he's also very respectful of women and their boundaries. He wouldn't push if you said no, but he might be a bit... persistent... if you said maybe, or said you wanted to get to know him better before making a decision. He might ask you more questions about yourself and your interests, or try to impress you with his cooking or fighting skills. But he wouldn't force you into anything, even if he does really like you

"I love your smile, and your laugh. Your eyes sparkle like jewels and your hair is like the sun on a sunny day. You're strong and brave, and you don't let anything stop you. I want to be the person who makes you smile the most in the whole world. My heart is yours; will you please accept it?"

Zoro

The way I envision it, he'd confess during a time of quiet, peace, and contemplation. He'd be hesitant, nervous, probably even a little awkward in his own way, but he'd do it without hesitation because it's what he's feeling. He'd want it to be genuine and sincere, and maybe it'd even be a spur-of-the-moment decision. If it's a more emotional moment, his swords might even be discarded to the side, as a symbolic gesture

*deep breath*" Oi. You know it's me, right? There's something I wanna get off my chest. It's not easy for me to put it into words. I don't know if I'm making sense... But here goes. I kinda like you- like like you. A lot. I think I've felt this way for a while now, but I haven't been able to say it. I know it's a lot to just say out loud, and it feels a bit... reckless. But I gotta just get it out. I like you."

Buggy

Buggy likes to present himself as powerful and intimidating. But deep down he's just an insecure guy who worries about what others think of him. In a private setting with someone he trusts, I think Buggy would be a lot more honest and open about his feelings. But he would still do it his own way, maybe in a roundabout way without actually saying the words "I love you".

I think Buggy would be very loyal and protective in a relationship, and he'd make sure that his partner knows that he values their connection deeply.

He would be careful not to say anything overly cheesy or melodramatic. He might try to lighten the mood with a joke, or compliment you in a way that makes you feel special and important to him. He would probably try to impress you with his strength and courage, and show off his abilities as a fighter and leader.

He would probably also be quite thoughtful and sweet, and show that he really cares about your well-being and happiness. But he wouldn't want to be too vulnerable or emotional, so he would likely try to keep things light and playful.

"So.. I.. err.. *cough* you're the most beautiful and amazing person I've ever met. (Turns all red) *cough* I mean... err... you're not too bad I guess. (Tries to smile) Wanna.. err.. be my partner.. I mean... umm... *cough* wanna be my romantic partner? Yeah, that's it. *cough* That was a joke, right? Right?"

Law

Law is the type to give subtle hints that he likes someone while keeping his feelings under wraps. If you like him too, you'd probably have to make a move first. He's the type to deny his feelings until the moment they're expressed. He has a hard time displaying his emotions, although he's quite a warm person internally.

If you confess he would probably be stunned at first. He wouldn't expect this to happen. However, once he processes what's occurred, he would probably say something along the lines of "Oh... hmm. Is that so?" His expression would definitely display his surprised and potentially pleased state. Though, he'll probably keep his answer brief and ambiguous. But the slightly blush and smirk on his face dont lie...

#yandere one piece #one piece imagine #buggy the clown x reader #buggy x reader #buggy the clown #law one piece #law x reader #luffy x reader #sanji x reader #zoro x reader #one piece #zoro #sanji #luffy

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deer-knight · 4 months

Text

it's 2024 you know what that means: time to stop shaving massive swaths of your body! listen. cmere. listen to me. if you're someone who regularly shaves your legs/armpits/arms/groin/etc. this is it. this is your sign.

now listen. i know. it feels so nice and smooth! you rub your legs together like cricket! swish swish! listen to me - have you ever fully let yourself have body hair? i mean it. fully let your hair grow until it doesnt grow any longer?

let me tell you something - i am a texture-sensitive being. truly. i was also someone who had to shave my legs daily if i wanted to give the illusion of a creature that doesn't have leg hair. and the fresh shave smoothness was nice! and the scratchy nonsense that started poking through at the end of the day was terrible! it also sucked to torture my skin this way all the time. i have thick, dark hair. and everyone would be on my case about it - my mother, sister, grandmother, kids at school or summer camp. "you missed a spot!" i banish you to the shadow realm.

beyond just knowing that the beauty standards of the world we live in are fucked, consider this an opportunity to just be curious about your body. it's 2024! gender is dead! humans often are covered in hair! its normal! people might give you a hard time about it. the best we can do is ignore them, if they are not the sort to see it as an opportunity to learn.

when i started wearing my unshaved legs bare i was so nervous. and after i made it clear to the people who would have bothered me about it that i wasn't going to bend to their expectations, nobody has really mentioned it. i've had kids ask why i have hair in my armpits or on my legs, because they don't have filters and are curious about their world, and i just say that its normal to have hair or to not have hair, for all people of all genders.

it takes a little bit of time to adjust to the feeling and texture. this much is true. but oh my gosh, i beg of you to try. even if you think you wont get over the sensory nightmare of the initial scratchiness. i haven't shaved in 7, 8 years now, and my hair is still thick and dark but the texture has softened so much, and i love the swish of hair on my legs, in my armpits, all over. i'm not on testosterone or anything, i'm just a hairy creature. y'all, it's so beautiful. it keeps me warm! it's soft in a different way - i can even condition it if i want extra softness! its an incredible texture, and i'm so grateful i let my body be the way it's always wanted to be.

it's 2024. you don't have to shave anymore. if you've been thinking about it, now's the time. free yourself. doesn't matter your gender or sexuality or anything. it doesn't make you less feminine, it doesn't make you less refined, it doesn't make you less sexy or less lovable or anything like that. anyone who says different isn't worth your time.

been wanting to make this post for a while now. your body is yours, and you can let it be as hairy as you like <3

#brought to you by a hairy creature #free your fuzz

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glitchfiles · 8 months

Text

heatstroke. [ljn]

pairing. mechanic! jeno x (afab) reader

wc. 3.8k+

cw. SMUT MINORS DNI!!, hard dom! jeno, profanity/cursing, outdoor/car sex, oral (m receiving), throat fucking, boot grinding, rough sex, degradation, name-calling (’slut’, ‘fucktoy’), etc…

an. i had this idea in june, but haven't had much time to write until recently. i had to rush a bit because i wanted to get it out before august/summer ends, I just made it lol. if there’s typos… oops… hope you enjoy :3

just before the muggy summer air lulls you to sleep, a series of sharp knocks at your windows jolts you fully conscious. as your eyes snap wide open, you turn to look to see a man standing outside of your car. he can tell by the bemused expression on your face you're struggling to figure out why he's here.

"roadside assistance, you called." realisation washes over your features, and the mystery man can't help but find it amusing how little control you have over your countenance.

you open the door slowly, allowing him time to move back, and groggily step out of the car. rays of sun prick your skin - the floral mini dress you had on left more of you exposed than covered.

"thanks for coming," you laugh nervously.

the sun is blinding, you can just make out the figure before you as you give your knight in shining armour a squinted once over.

his uniform consists of navy overalls and heavy boots; though he had taken the top half of his overalls off and tied the sleeves around his waist, you're sure he's sweltering. the white tank top he wore hugs his broad, muscular torso, which you can't help but ogle at.

"no problem. any idea what the issue is?" as he nears your car, you get a better look at his face. and just as you feared, he has a face to match the body.

his features are sharp, from his jaw to the upturned corners of his mouth to his nose. in contrast, the way his eyes soften up as he smiles at you fills your stomach with butterflies.

you catch yourself then clear your throat before responding. "no, it just broke down. i'm lucky i pulled over in time."

if you were trying to hide that you were checking him out, you were doing the worst job ever.

unabashed stares were far from foreign to him, he couldn’t say he minded them - especially when they were from someone cute.

he takes a quick walk around the vehicle, checking for any external damage. "tyres look fine," he mumbles to himself.

then he stops at the hood to pop it open. a frown settles upon his features as he begins to try to diagnose the issue at hand.

you don't even try to understand what he's doing, you're honestly far more concerned with analysing every square inch of the adonis before you.

"you okay standing out here? it's pretty hot," he turns to you. you had lost track of time, has it been a few minutes or a few hours? "you can sit in my truck, it has ac, or i can get you some water."

"just the water is fine!" you respond, even though cold air sounded like paradise right now actually, "i've always been somewhat interested in cars and stuff." you lied again.

"oh, really?" he raised an eyebrow, unconvinced.

"yeah, my dad used to fix old cars up - he'd make me hand him tools from time to time." you walked closer to him, leaving a few centimetres between your bodies.

"then, you wouldn't mind helping me out a bit? i think i know what the issue is here." you nodded vehemently, unable to stop yourself from forming an eager smile.

only when he walks away do you realise you have been holding your breath. you barely have time to catch it before he's back with two chilled water bottles in one hand and a hefty toolbox in the other. bulging muscles ripple across his arms, the sight puts a fluttery feeling in the pit of your stomach.

he sets the box down with a light grunt, then looks at you kindly and with an outstretched arm to hand you a cool bottle. the fact his hand, which you notice is comparatively larger and rougher, brushes against yours only exacerbates your condition.

you can barely look him in the eye as you take the bottle from him; you waste no time before cracking it open and gulping down a considerable amount. his eyes can’t help but follow the droplets of water that escape the corner of your mouth, trickling down your chin, your neck and then your chest before disappearing between your cleavage (which he had been trying to ignore from the moment you stepped out of your car).

“someone’s thirsty,” he mentally slaps himself and comments with a chuckle to ease the moment of tension.

he takes a swig of water before putting on gloves, picking a took out of the box and getting to work.

for a moment, only the sound of distant wildlife in the surrounding area can be heard. leaving you ample time to watch. the way his brows furrow as he concentrates on his job is more attractive than it should be.

“my name is jeno by the way,” he breaks the silence. you hadn’t even thought to ask, you quickly reply with your name. “where are you heading?”

“my friend’s place for a barbecue. this was supposed to be a shortcut, but it ended up leaving me stranded in the middle of nowhere.” he lets out a sympathetic hum before letting a comfortable silence fall between the two of you again.

he hands whatever tool he has in his hand to you and asks, “can you pass me the torque wrench?”

you stare at him blankly then you stare down at the array of tools laid out. the temperature of your body increases even further as he smiles at you knowingly.

“hard to think with the heat, huh?” he chuckles walking past you to pick up the tool you would have never guessed was what he was asking for. “don’t worry about it, you can just stand and watch,” he said as though that wasn’t what you had been doing up until now anyway.

he’s sure you’re not actually interested in cars in the slightest but rattles on about the topic. most of it all flies over your head but you nod and giggle as your gaze trails over the veins on his arms are he tightens bolts.

after a short while, he stands up straight. wiping his forearm over his sweaty forehead he declares he thinks he’s done.

“key?” he plucks off his gloves as you fish it out of your purse and hand it over to him. “glad you know that one.” he teases.

you watch with bated breath as he gets into your car to start it; sure enough, the engine purrs when he turns the key.

he jumps out of the car and flashes you a proud smile that makes you melt more than the heat.

"so...” he starts tucking his gloves into his pocket then he rubs his hands together before placing them on his hips. "how would you like to pay?"

"oh yeah, let me just get my purse. how much was it?." you open your bag to rummage around for your wallet as he tells you the price.

your phone…

sunglasses…

a pack of gum…

lip gloss…

no wallet.

you smile up at him nervously, excusing yourself to go look in your glove compartment.

jeno follows you around to see you bent over and rummaging around. he loses track of time, too preoccupied with the way your dress rides up to barely cover your ass. he didn't notice how translucent the fabric was until now, he could just make out the outline of the thong you were wearing.

while he blissfully enjoys the show, dread fills you at the realisation you may not be able to pay. you desperately look for stray bits of cash, but you can’t seem to find even a penny in your car all of a sudden.

your frantic search yields absolutely nothing. you take a second to steel yourself before stepping back onto the ground and turning towards him with a doe-eyed guilty expression that makes something stir in his abdomen.

"i swear i had it but-" you mutter, finally moving to sit facing him in the passenger’s seat. he suddenly feels a lot bigger now you're staring up at him and he's looking down at you. "but it's not- i don't have any money so-"

"well, there are other ways to pay." only when the words leave his mouth does jeno realise there is room for misinterpretation but, for some reason, he doesn't feel like correcting himself.

maybe it was the warmth or the stress of your predicament, but your mind began to entertain itself with thoughts that had nothing to do with getting this man that you had only met today his money.

you blinked dumbly, absolutely none of the cogs turning in your brain as you started eyeing him again. starting at the neckline of his tank and then fixating on his deep collarbones momentarily before drifting down.

sweat had turned the white cotton covering his torso almost transparent. the material clung to the ridges of his toned chest and abs, leaving almost nothing to the imagination.

your mouth went dry; you were eyeing him like a dehydrated desert wanderer who had just spotted an oasis.

“like… how?” you blink up at him as though you don’t catch his drift. the innocence you feign starts to chip away at his self-control.

though he comes off as rather relaxed on the outside, jeno is rather rigid with himself. he had to be to run a business with any success. but at the end of the day, he was his own boss; no one had to know about this.

he glanced around. you were on a road in the middle of nowhere surrounded by woodland and he couldn't remember the last time he had seen another car drive past.

he could bend his rules this once for you.

“you’re not just a pretty face, you’re a smart girl, right?” finally, he gives into the desire that had been building inside of him since the moment he laid eyes on you. his charming eye-smile turns into a dark glare; his voice drops a couple octaves. “use your head.”

without another word, you stand up and sink down to squat, reluctant to get your knees dirty. you stare up awaiting further instruction.

“you know transfers are a thing, right?” he laughs sliding a hand over your cheek, feeling a switch inside of him flip. here you were debasing yourself for a man you had just met. “i think i like this much better though, clever girl.”

he can’t believe you’re doing this.

he can’t believe he’s doing this.

you untie his overalls letting them drop down to his knees and tug down his boxers. internally you let out a sigh of relief at the sight of a well-groomed semi-hard cock. feeling it twitch up to attention as you wrap a hand around it. he groans out an obscenity as you begin to tentatively stoke him.

“you’re gonna need to do a lot more than that if you plan on giving me my money’s worth.” he tuts down at you, sliding his hand to rest on the back of your head.

“whatever you want.” the seductive lilt of your voice makes him reel.

“whatever?” his chest rises as he takes a deep breath and forms a light grip on your locks.

“anything.” you nod.

“then open your fucking mouth, slut.” his voice suddenly becomes gravelly and commanding as he cranes your head back. you obediently open up for him, wrapping your lips around his tip to lap at the salty fluid that had started to spill out of it.

“hands behind your back,” the look in his eyes is wild as he watches you promptly obey him without reluctance. you want to please him, repay him for his kindness.

you take the initiative to take him even deeper, creeping down inch by inch deeper with each bob; the more you take, the more drool escapes the corners of your mouth, dripping down in thick strings. you let out garbled moans, sending vibrations through him; his hand instinctively grips your locks, pushing his cock harshly into the back of your throat. you swallow a gag and tears prick your eyes but keep going.

“you’re so good,” he huffs, abdomen tightening, “you do this often? bet you’d let any man shove their cock down your throat, cheap fucking slut.”

you whine around him in protest, he lets you up to speak. you vehemently shake your head and choke out, “only you.“

“just for me.” his thumb softly endearingly caresses the back of your head. “god, what did i do to get this lucky.” he half mutters to himself before shoving himself back into your accepting mouth.

he continues to fuck into your face like you’re nothing but a hole and you take it. his head tips back as he lets out unbridled moans, comforted by the fact there was no one for miles to witness your debauchery, but infinitely turned on by the fact you were so out in the open.

jeno's breathing gets more ragged with each thrust, he hunches forward at the feeling of his orgasm hurtling towards him. if your mouth wasn't currently stuffed, you would smile as you brought a hand up to toy with his saliva-coated balls.

"oh my fucking- i'm cumming." it was the last push he needed before shooting his load down your throat. keeping you locked in place, nose smushed up against his pubic bone. all strength leaves your legs and you fall to your knees, the hard ground digs into your skin but the pain means nothing when he’s groaning about how well you’re taking his cum. you can barely breathe and your head is spinning but you wish you could make him cum again already.

after a while, he settles down from his high and slowly removes himself. his hand grips firmly at your hair, keeping you in place.

“what a fucking mess.” he sneers while admiring his work, how filthy you look kneeling before him. spit and cum cover your chin down to your chest; the low neckline of your dress is soaked. not to mention your makeup, black inky streaks ran down your cheeks. “liked taking my cock so much you forgot you had something to look pretty for.”

the look in your eyes was close to piety, unfazed that there was no way you could go to your friend’s house in this state. maybe he’d fucked your face a little too hard and knocked some sense out of you. it was the only explanation for you so gleefully offering yourself to every whim of a stranger; jeno was not a good enough man to refuse such an offer.

“want more? you know, most of my customers tip.” he says in an expectant tone. “no pressure though.”

“wanna fuck me?” you run a finger up his thigh, skipping being coy - you needed him.

“i don’t know, can i?” he wants to toy with you, however.

“i said you can do anything, didn’t i?” you shuffle closer to him on your knees, batting your eyelashes up at him.

“anything…” he repeats, dark thoughts run through his mind. a deep, shaky breath leaves jeno’s nostrils as he tries to contain the arousal stirring back up inside of him. he moves his leg forward, situating one of his heavy work boots between your legs; with the grasp he still has on you, he forces your core to come down against it.

he doesn’t have to utter another word before your hips start moving. you bite your lip to contain the sounds threatening to escape you, shame finally kicking in somewhat. but he was having none of that; a sharp tug at your hair was all it took, he tipped your head back, and all the moans came spilling out.

“good.” his praise encourages you to circle your hips faster. the panties you have on do nothing to hide how slick you are.

you angle your hips for more stimulation, your swollen clit growing more sensitive by the second. you haven’t been at this for that long, but he can tell by the way your moans pick in pitch you’re nearly there.

“close already?” he lifts the toe of his boot, pressing into you harder. “go ahead, cum on my boot. dirty, pathetic slut.” you whimper out pitifully as your orgasm finally wreaks you.

he leaves you no time to recuperate before tugging your locks to make you stand and smashing his lips against yours. only now does it hit you that you’ve skipped quite a few bases, it’s the first time you’ve felt his lips against your own.

you melt into his domineering kiss, trying your best to keep up with his lascivious pace. hands grope at your body, smoothing up your thighs and under your dress.

a whine leaves your lips when his hands roughly squeeze your ass. he wastes no time attaching his lips to your neck, nipping at the skin as he moves to start pulling your panties off, you help him get them off the rest of the way and throw them somewhere into your car.

deft fingers wander between your folds, collecting your wetness on his fingertips. the slightest brush against your raw clit makes you shudder in his grasp.

“gonna use this wet little pussy, just like i did your throat.” he whispered hotly against the skin of your neck, teasing your miserably sopping slit. “and you’re gonna take it like the good fucktoy you are.”

now’s the point he’d finger a girl open a bit, maybe make her cum again. he’s usually kinder, more careful, less selfish; all that runs through his mind are animalistic thoughts of ruining you.

you see the moment his resolve snaps completely, pupils dilating as a vein pops up on his temple. with no finesse at all, you’re turned around; a hand plants itself on your back, firmly pushing your torso down, you barely cushion your fall onto the car seat.

he almost goes right in before the last fragment of sense left inside of him reminds him he’s forgotten something crucial.

“shit, i don’t have a condom.” he slaps a hand over his face, vexed over the possibility of things ending here.

“i think i might,” you hurriedly reach into the glove compartment. not taking long to produce a foil packet and hand it to him; you turn to see he has an amused expression on his face.

“you remembered condoms but not money?” he snickers. “priorities.”

you lower your head in embarrassment, begging him to get on with it. he obliges, quickly ripping open the packet and wrapping his cock up. with a deep hum, he slides his cock up between your ass cheeks. your back arches to push your backside further against him temptingly.

your mouths hang open in unison as he slides into you. he releases a long groan as he bottoms out, your tight unprepared hole swallowing him up deliciously. jeno’s body moves on its own, allowing neither of you time to adjust before reeling his hips back and slamming back in. his hands find purchase on your hips as he begins to pound you, digging into your curves for leverage; each thrust punching a choked moan out of you.

“taking me so well,” he eyes the shameless mess beneath him, skin glistening with perspiration. he’s sure he’s equally as sweaty with the heat, probably more so with how much he is exerting himself; sweaty bangs stuck to his forehead, he can feel droplets racing down the sharp contours of his face to drip off his chin. yet he feels no fatigue, adrenaline keeps him going - keeps him fucking into you at a bestial pace. something about being surrounded by wilderness draws out a side of him so despicably feral, a side of him he had never been able to admit to having.

when he said he would use you, he meant it well and truly. his cock bullied its way deeper into you.

“god! so fucking deep.” you manage to stutter out as he mercilessly crams every last inch of his cock inside. you’re sure he doesn’t mean or care to, but he hits all the spots that make your walls clench around him tighter, sucking him in deeper.

“i can feel how close you are,” your legs shake, everything becoming more and more overwhelming by the second. his fingers dig into your flesh, holding your squirming body, “like being my fucktoy, yeah? gonna cream all over my cock?”

your legs shake and your nails scrape at the hard cushion beneath you as you bawl out incoherent words about how you’re cumming. your eyes roll into the back of you as the feeling seizes your body wholly. leaving your ears ringing and broken moans tumbling out of you as he drills you through your high.

once you fall, your legs give out and you fall limp on the seat. jeno doesn’t let up at all though. strong hands lay into your shoulders, your body is pressed further into the chair with his body weight. you barely have the space to breathe but he couldn’t care less, not when he was so close to the peak.

he plants a foot on the car’s sill to anchor himself through a barrage of unrestrained, choppy thrusts. your poor car jolts and whines under their power.

between getting your throat fucked raw and brain-melting overstimulation, you could not form words; nothing that came out of jeno was coherent either, guttural noises of pleasure erupted from him.

you only find out he’s cumming when you feel his cock twitch inside your sensitive walls. the fact he’s moaning your name between grunts is something you barely pick up; your body and mind have gone numb. motor function is off the table now, the only movement you can manage are involuntary muscle twitches.

jeno stills, basking in the fading pleasure, catching his breath. you’re too out of it to let out a small whine as he pulls out of you, leaving you devastatingly empty.

“you good?” he pipes up, as you sluggishly pick yourself up.

“fine, i think.” the heat and exhaustion have evidently defeated you; the look in your eyes is vacant as you wipe the sweat off of your forehead. you fix the straps of your soiled dress and plant your feet on the ground, your legs give out momentarily, but you catch yourself before you fall to the ground. he can't help but burst out laughing.

“look at you,” he takes your hand to steady you. the smirk on his face tells you he’s thoroughly enjoying the fact he’s fucked you to the point you can’t walk straight. “let’s get you cleaned up and home.”

“thanks,” your cheeks grow hot as you limp toward his truck.

“next time, bring money. not everyone’s as nice as me.”

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#jeno smut #nct dream smut #nct hard hours #nct smut #📂 ..\ .◜◡◝

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