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#literally didn't go to sleep until like 2 am
meownotgood · 10 months
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Maggie shnookie pookie bear I miss you how are u 🥹🥹🥹🥹
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HI SWEETIE PIE I'M DOING GOOD!!!!! WORKING HARD!!!!!!!!!
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ms-demeanor · 7 months
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I think the eight alarms thing is usually a maladaptation. You've trained your brain to ignore the eight alarms because you kept avoiding the training of willpower following the first alarm would require. I think some sleep therapy might help?
Hey so first of all fuck you, thanks.
Second: I love it when you read literature on sleep disorders, especially if it's on sleep disorders among folks with ADHD, and you see time and time again "when allowed to sleep on their preferred schedule subjects maintained healthy, normal, restorative sleep cycles" and "effects were not lasting without ongoing intervention; resetting the sleep schedule is a permanent effort."
Like, if I sleep *great* from 6am to 2pm and I wake up feeling rested and alert with no special help but I need to turn off the lights in my house and shut down all electronics at 8pm and beam a spotlight into my face starting at 5am to wake up at seven and feel exhausted all day, I think perhaps it is not actually my sleep cycle that is wrong it is perhaps society that is wrong.
BELIEVE ME, when I find the job that pays well and has decent insurance that lets me exist as a cheerful nighttime ghoul I am jumping on that with both feet. But until then I literally feel better getting six hours of sleep and occasionally sleeping so hard that i can't hear my alarms because of chronic sleep deprivation than I do turning off all the lights in my house and ceasing all activity two and a half hours after I get off of work.
Also: the eight alarms aren't all there to wake me up, it's just that sometimes I *also* sleep through the ones that are supposed to remind me to go sit at my desk and start work. One of the first three usually gets me up, but on a day when I sleep through all three of those I will be sleeping through all eight of them and usually a phone call and someone trying to shake me awake to.
ANYWAY after being treated with melatonin and light therapy and staring listlessly at the ceiling in the dark bored out of my skull with racing thoughts for sleep disorders that I didn't have for like twenty years the single most effective intervention that allowed me to get more sleep as someone with both ADHD and DSPD was to start hanging out and being active in places where it would be easy to fall asleep if the sleep caught me there instead of turning my bedroom into a dark, silent shrine of snoozing. Giving myself permission to fall asleep late instead of laying awake chewing myself up with guilt for not being asleep helped too.
Actually here's some tips for the sleepy bitches in the crowd:
1 - If you're laying down and not falling asleep in half an hour, you're not actually sleepy; read something or get up and do something because you're more likely to get sleepy faster that way than you are staring at the clock going "if I fall asleep now I'll have three hours and forty five minutes of rest when I have to go to work; If I fall asleep now I'll have three hours and twenty minutes of sleep when I have to get up, etc. etc."
2 - Allow yourself to be ambushed by sleep. Fall asleep on your cozy couch. Fall asleep in the comfy chair. Let yourself sleep where you fall asleep instead of dragging yourself to where you're 'supposed' to sleep if doing so will wake you up.
3 - The mythbusters thing. If you just lay down and close your eyes and pretend to rest you will feel more rested when you get up than when you laid down. Laying down to rest is better than nothing, it literally causes cognitive improvements similar to sleep in tests, and knowing that can help take off some of the pressure of not being able to fall asleep and can thus help you fall asleep.
4 - It's okay to "hang out" in the area where you're going to sleep. Read in bed. Play games on your cellphone in bed. If you want to go to sleep put on comfy clothes and bring a chill activity and hang out in your bed to do it so that all you have to do when you start getting sleepy is close your eyes.
5 - It's better to get some sleep than no sleep. Sometimes you look at the clock and it's six AM and whoops, fuck it. Okay, time for bed, don't stress that you're only going to get a few hours, a few hours is better than nothing. Lay down to pretend to rest at least and you'll probably feel okay.
6 - This one sounds silly and might not work for a bunch of people for a bunch of reasons but apparently there's some research suggesting that "well-rested" is a state of mind? I've had a reasonable amount of success with just telling myself "Yeah, I actually feel pretty good," and pushing through the day on a couple of hours of sleep. I don't *recommend* that and you should try to get as much sleep as possible, but yeah the next time you're low on sleep see what happens if you just try to decide to not be tired. It sounded like bullshit to me when I first heard it but I've found some success with it.
7 - This shit is cumulative. If you're doing a couple nights a week on low sleep that's not ideal but you're probably going to be pretty functional and you can work on it. If you overbook and overextend yourself for too long - I'm looking at you college students and new parents - it's going to add up. Try as much as possible to at least keep your sleep deficit nights spread out. (This message brought to you by writing 60k words of fiction in october and completely frying my brain because i wasn't getting enough sleep).
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kpop---scenarios · 17 days
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Reckless (1)
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Pairing: Lee Know x Reader
Genre: Brothers best friend
Warning: Language, a little violence etc, smut later on
Word Count: 3k
“Jisung!” You yell from your room, covering your ears with your pillow. If he didn't shut the fuck up, you were going to lose it. “Jisung!” You scream again. Angrily, you crawl out of your bed, stomping your way across the hallway to his room. You try to open the door but the door is locked. You pound on the door, anger flowing through you.
“Open the door!” You yell, pounding even harder. Finally the door swings open, your brother looking annoyed.
“The fuck do you want?” He asks, rubbing his face.
“I have an exam tomorrow. I can't sleep with the fucking music coming from your room.” You yell. “Shut the fuck up.”
“Wear some headphones then.” Jisung scoffs.
“I swear to fucking..” you pause, as Jisungs best friends comes to the door.
“Feeling feisty tonight, are we?” Minho chuckles, moving past your brother and out of his room.
“Yeah I am, watch out.” You snap, stomping back to your room, slamming the door behind you.
Your parents had been gone for months for work, and unfortunately for you Jisung had decided to slack off at school despite school only being in for 3 months. He was partying constantly and having his degenerate friends over at the house all the time. Lee Know, or Minho was the worst of them all and he never fucking left.
He was an arrogant, annoying, selfish, violent, short tempered man who you disliked the most out of all Jisung’s friends. The two of them were a few years older than you, both supposed to be in University but the way things were currently going, you didn't know how much longer either of them were going to be enrolled. You however were in your first year at the same University and you were not going to take your opportunity for granted. You wanted to get out of this town and move away onto bigger and better things.
As the volume of the music is finally lowered, you get comfortable in your bed, easily falling asleep, finally.
The next morning you're up early, deciding payback was much needed for keeping you up half the night. As you're hopping around your room, singing along to your loud music, getting ready for class, you faintly hear a pounding on your door. You laugh to yourself as you make your way, ripping the door open, seeing an annoyed Minho standing there, shirtless with a pair of sweats on.
“It's 7am.” He deadpans.
“And?” You ask.
“I've been sleeping for 2 hours.” He groans. “Turn it down.”
“That sounds like a you problem.” you begin. “Also, last I checked, this isn't your house.” You smile, closing the door in his face before he can say anything. You head to your stereo, turning the music down, for a few minutes until you felt like he was comfortable in bed again, starting to doze off and you turned it up again. Not long after you turned it off completely, heading to the kitchen to grab a banana before you headed to the bus stop. You wanted to get to school a little earlier than usual, taking time to go over your psychology notes for your exam, one last time.
“Y/N.” You hear from behind you in the library. You turn around, seeing your best friend, Hyunjin, standing there with bags under his eyes, holding a mass amount of papers, and looking extremely uneasy.
“Hyunjin.. what happened?” You ask, trying not to laugh at the poor man looking so defeated.
“it's literally the 3rd month of school, and I'm going to fucking flunk out.” He gasps, sitting next to you.
“No you're not.” You chuckle, flipping over your notes to look at the backside.
“I tried to study all night but I kept falling asleep. Why did I come here? I hate it.” He pouts. You shake your head at the man, focusing on your notes.
“Well.” You sigh. “At this rate, I'll be failing with you. Minho was at my house again last night. He and Jisung were blasting music until all hours.” You say, rolling your eyes.
“Minho was at your house?” Your other friend, Jisoo gasps, pulling up a chair beside you. “You're so lucky.”
“He's so fucking annoying.” You retort.
“But he's so hot.” Jisoo grins.
You ignored her last comment, you didn't want to vocally agree with her, because the last thing you needed was for your words to get back to him and inflate his head more than it already was.
“And to be honest, so is your brother. Is he single?” She asks.
“He's single. But I'm going to tell you not to go there because I don't want you to stop being my friend.” You laugh. “He's a terrible human being.”
“But he's hot.” Jisoo swoons, batting her eyes at you.
“Gross.” You sigh, looking at your phone. You gather your things off the table, dragging Hyunjin behind you to your psychology classroom.
“Please, Y/N.” He begs from behind you. You turn your head to look at him, giggling at the pitiful man who is usually so confident. This exam really has him fucked up. You turn your head again to look where you're going, and bump into someone, knocking your papers and bag to the floor.
“Ugh, I'm so sorry.” You sigh, bending down to pick up your things. You look up, seeing Minho glare down at you. You roll your eyes instantly, scoffing. “Actually I'm not sorry.” You say, finishing picking everything up. You stand up, Minho still staring at you but now smiling. Hyunjin comes up beside you, swinging his arm around your shoulders.
“Come on.” He says, pulling you away from Minho, who still hadn't said a word to you, but the smile never left his face.
“You got this.” You say to Hyunjin, your hands on his shoulders as you both take deep breaths outside your classroom door.
“So do you.” He breathes. “Drinks after?” He asks. You glance at your watch, 12:58pm. You should be done by 4pm..
“Abso-fucking-lutely.” You grin as the two of you make your way into the class.
3 hours later, you both emerge from the room, disheveled hair, sweat and tear stains present on both of you.
“How did..” Hyunjin starts. You put your hand up to stop him.
“Not yet. Shots..lots of shots.” You whimper. The two of you link arms, heading for the pub down the street from campus.
Hours later, you stumble home. As you stand in your yard you see lights flashing inside, and you can hear the bass thumping from the street. Jisung would throw a party on a random Thursday. That's just what he does. You quickly text Hyunjin and Jisoo to come over and party with you, both of them replying that they'll be there soon. You head inside, your brother spots you immediately.
“Y/N.. it's only just started. Don't shut me down.” He fake cries. You glare at him, seeing Minho walk up behind him. A few of his other friends were standing around, a lot of other people you didn't know also staring at you.
“Let's do some fucking shots!” You yell, making your way to the kitchen, hearing the cheers from the party goers. You walk past a chuckling Minho on your way to the kitchen. You glare at him before grabbing his sleeve, pulling him in there with you and a few others to take some shots. As you're about to do your second one, Hyunjin and Jisoo walk in. You were already drunk from your after exam drunks with Hyunjin, and now you were feeling it even more.
“Jinnie.” You squeal, putting your arms out for a hug. He grins as he wraps his arms around you, holding you tightly. Instantly you hear Jisoo’s flirty voice come to play, you break the hug to turn around and see Jisoo and Jisung tucked in a corner talking.
That made you want to vomit. You turn back towards the group taking shots, quickly pouring one for Hyunjin before you all take it. “Let's dance!” You yell, walking past Minho with Hyunjin in tow. You're dancing, laughing and just all around having a good time but you can't help but notice Minho standing against the wall with his arms crossed, eyes trained on you. They roamed up and down your body as he watched you dance, and you hated that the way he was looking at you, that the way he was biting his lip was turning you on so much.
“I'm gonna get a drink.” You tell Hyunjin, making your way to the kitchen. You feel a hand on your wrist, pulling you down the hallway instead.
“You looked really hot out there.” a guy tells you. You have no clue who this dude was, and frankly you were not interested.
“Thanks.” You respond, turning back towards the kitchen.
He grabs you again. “I wasn't done talking to you.” He half laughs.
You can feel the annoyance building up inside of you. “But I'm done.” You say, trying to walk away again. His grip tightens, pushing you against the wall.
“I'm trying to get to know you better.” He scoffs. “Don't be so rude.”
“I'm not interested.” You tell him, as if your current lack of interest wasn't enough.
He stares at you, refusing to move, not saying a word. You can see the wheels turning in his head as he tries to figure out what to say to you next. Before he can get his words out, he's shoved away from you, sliding down the floor of the hallway. Your mouth hangs open as you turn to look and see who your savior was.
Minho stands there, his eyes practically shooting daggers into the man.
“Are you fucking dumb, Changbin?” Minho asks.
“What the fuck, dude?” Changbin scoffs, scrambling up off the floor.
“That's Jisung's little sister you fucking moron.” Minho snaps, pointing at you.
“Oh shit.. I'm sorry! I didn't know!” He panics. Your eyes bounce between the two men, not sure why Changbin sounded so scared of your idiot brother.
“I'll let you off this time.” Minho starts. “If I catch you near her again, I will beat the fucking shit out of you.” He finishes. Changbin nods his head before running off into the crowd.
“You okay?” Minho asks as you rub your wrist. You nod your head.
“Yeah.. thanks.” You smile, returning to the party. The rest of the night, wherever you went, Minho was there, off in the distance watching you. You weren't uncomfortable from it but you did wish that he would go and enjoy himself. He didn't need to keep an eye on you, and as you got drunker, you decided to let him know.
“You.. keep staring.” You hiccup, placing your hand on the wall by his head. He smirks as he looks at you, barely able to stand up straight, eyes fluttering open and closed. You were a goddamn mess.
“Let's get you to bed, mhm?” He says, wrapping his arm around your waist to help you up the stairs. As you're walking up, you unfortunately see Jisung and Jisoo locking lips, making all the drinks you had all night threaten to come up.
“Get a room you sick fucks.” You slur, walking past them. Jisoo comes up for air looking embarrassed but only for a second before Jisung steals her attention back. Minho helps you to your room, you stand in the middle, your arms up high. He looks at you with a raised eyebrow, wondering what the fuck you were waiting for.
“I can't sleep in my clothes.” You whine. “but I'll fall if I undress myself.” You pout.
Minho reluctantly walks towards you, grabbing the hem of your shirt, pulling it up and over your head, leaving you in a bra and your pants. He moves his hands down towards the button of your jeans. You hop back a little, almost losing your balance as you laugh, hysterically.
“Funny.” He fake chuckles, moving towards you again. You grab onto his arm, spinning yourself around to his back, sliding your hands up and down his body. You reach around to his stomach, moving your hands under his shirt, running them over his abs.
“Ugh.” You groan at the feeling.
He quickly turns around facing you once again, a smile spread across his face. You knew he wanted to be mad at you but he couldn't.
“Take your pants off or I'm gonna throw you down onto the bed and take them off for you.” He threatens. You blush, hard.
“Is that a threat or a promise?” You ask, cocking your head to the side. Minho reaches out for you, grabbing you by the waist of your jeans, pulling you towards him. “It's a little of both.” He tells you as he tries to undo your button. You were having too much fun in the moment, you didn't want it to end just yet. You grab his hands, pushing him away from you, laughing as he runs his hands through his hair. He has never seen this giggling playful side of you before, and he was enjoying the fuck out of it.
“Y/N.” He says sternly, his hands on his hips.
“Minho.” You say, putting your hands on your hips, pushing your hip out, pursing your lips. He's trying to remain serious but he can't. He starts laughing as he rubs his face, groaning in frustration.
“Take off your pants!” He yells.
“Yes sir!” You giggle as you take off your pants, leaving you in your bra and panties. Minho hands you a pair of pj shorts that he grabbed from your dresser. You semi quickly put them on before turning around, facing away from him to unhook your bra. It slides down your body, onto the floor. You smile to yourself.
“I bet you're upset, huh?” You giggle, turning your head to look at him.
“Why would I be upset?” He asks.
“Cause you can't see my boobies.” You laugh, turning slightly to show him a little side boob. “I think you'd like them.” You say, looking at him. His eyes are focused down, looking at what you're showing him. “Tsk tsk, naughty boy.” You scold, slipping your shirt on, turning around to face him.
He stares at you, and you stare back. You examine his face, his large veiny arms and hands, his roughly tousled hair.
“Jisoo was right.” You whisper.
“About?” He asks.
“You.” You hiccup. “She said you were hot.”
“And what did you say?” He asks.
“I didn't say. Cause I don't need my words going to your thick ass head.” You giggle.
“If they wouldn't go to my head, what would you say?” He asks.
“That you're really fucking hot. But you're a little violent and hot headed.” You sigh. “Buuut you're not allowed to know that so shhh.. cause Jisung said you're off limits.”
“Since when do you do what your brother tells you?” He laughs.
“I listen to him!” you say. No you didn't. “Actually, never.” You hiccup.
He doesn't reply. He stands there, staring at you. You can feel your breath hitch as he moves closer towards you, the palm of his hand gently laying on your cheek as his face moves closer to yours. You close your eyes, the world is spinning as you feel his lips press against yours. You feel like you're melting into the kiss as your lips move against his, his tongue slowly sliding into your mouth, deepening the kiss.
You could have sworn this was a dream, like his lips were perfectly made for your own. He slowly pulls away, turning to look at the door, and that's when you hear it.
“Minho!”
It's your brother's voice. “Lee fucking Know!” He yells.
“Go to sleep.” He says to you, turning and walking out of your room. You lay down in your bed, closing your eyes. The world only spins for a moment before you pass out.
**
“I'm never drinking again.” You gasp as you crawl out of your bed, desperately trying to make your way to the bathroom to get some water. Your throat was the driest it had ever been and you felt like you might actually die. Once you reach the sink, you shove your head underneath, drinking all the cold water you could get into your mouth. Fuck it tastes good. When you're finally satisfied, you drag your feet to change into some comfier clothes before heading downstairs. Luckily you didn't have class until the afternoon today, so you could try to recover this morning. You grab some food from the fridge, eating it cold, ignoring the passed out people scattered around your house.
“Morning.” You hear. You turn to look, seeing Minho walk into the kitchen, heading for the fridge.
“Morning.” You sigh.
“Hungover?” He asks you, grabbing some juice. You whimper as you nod your head. He laughs. You turn to glare at him, when suddenly you remembered. You think you remembered at least.
“Did..” you pause. “We.. um.. actually nevermind.” You say, turning away from him.
“Did we, what?” He asks, grinning.
“Kiss?” You whisper, looking around, making sure Jisung wasn't around.
“Me and you?” He asks, shocked. “Did you have a sex dream about me?” He gasps, placing his hand over his chest.
“What!? No! I just had a flash.. of something.. and we were kissing.” You try to explain.
“I feel so violated.” He fake cries. “I wasn't aware you thought of me like that.”
“Who's thinking of you like what?” You hear. Jisung walks into the kitchen, grabbing your food off the counter.
“Y/N.” Minho says. “I think she's into me.” He laughs.
“Yeah right.” Jisung chuckles. “Neither of you are dumb enough to do that.”
You look at Minho as he looks at you. Neither of you were dumb enough.. right?
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junnieverse · 8 months
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DRUNK - DAZED ➳ ENHYPEN
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➙ enhypen's reaction to you not recognising them whilst you were drunk
pairing: enhypen x gn!reader
genre: crack, very little fluff
request: " so yk the series u did with the drunk enha not recognizing their partner… u should write about the roles being reversed and their partner is the one that can’t recognize them "
warnings: lowercase intended, mentions of alcohol/drinking, not proofread, jake swears once in his drabble
a/n: thank you for the request anon, here it is! this was a cool idea too so I hope you liked it :)
a/n (2): I also wasn't sure on whether or not to add riki into this one as well but I decided to go for it but riki is not drinking and the reader is legal to drink in the drabble
a/n (3): you can also find my post on enha not recognising their s/o whilst drunk [ here ]
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🖇️ — 양정원 ; JUNGWON !
you had been out celebrating with some friends and jungwon had been their too to make sure you didn't go overboard
what he wasn't expecting was for you to claim to not know who he was when it was time to leave
he wasn't suprised by your drunken behavior but he was taken aback when you asked him to prove he actually was your boyfriend
"If you're really my boyfriend, tell me something only he would know about me?" you interrogate him raising an eyebrow
"You once farted in front of my friends and blamed my dog." he says shaking his head
immediately covering his mouth you shush him feeling embarrassed at the revelation
"I can't believe Jungwon told you, he swore never to say anything." you whisper pouting as he gently removed your hands
"That's because I am Jungwon, now let's get you sobered up."
despite having already known this little secret you still couldn't seem to look Jungwon in the eye until you ran away into your room to go sleep to avoid him
🖇️ — 이희승 ; HEESEUNG !
you had a night out with some friends and your boyfriend was always the go-to person to call when you got hammered
tonight was unexpectedly different when you saw riki and pushed him away
even your friends would try telling you to sober up so heeseung could take you home but you argued that you didn't know him
"I DON'T KNOW THAT MAN! DON'T FEED ME TO THE WOLVES YOU PUNKS!" you yell out to your friends
he was shocked to say the least because you've never acted this way around him
soon your boyfriend had to step in and he carried you over his shoulder whilst you hit his back
"LET GO OF ME YOU CREEP BEFORE I CALL THE POLICE BECAUSE IF I CALL MY BOYFRIEND HE WON'T GO EASY ON YOU!" you fight as your words came out slurred
despite your pretty weak defence, he oddly found this entertaining
he makes sure to help you sober up and feeds you until you fall asleep
🖇️ — 박종성 ; JAY !
you were a mess
jay got a call from your friends that you were crying saying you missed him and so he came over to get you
turns out you were just incredibly drunk and rambling over how perfect your boyfriend was and you 'didn't deserve him'
"I'm right here darling, wanna leave?" jay says rubbing your back as you look at him dazed
"Who are you sir?" you ask sniffling softly as you wipe a tear
he was left too stunned to speak
thought it was just you messing around with him but after he laughed and he say how stoic you were, he realised you were serious
"What, I'm literally your boyfriend, it's me Jay." he says pointing to himself as you shake your head
"No, my boyfriend is way cuter, no offense sir." you tell him taking another sip of your drink
he wasn't sure whether to take your words as an offense or a compliment but he still couldn't believe it
🖇️ — 심재윤 ; JAKE !
jake got a little pouty seeing as you couldn't recognise him
all he wanted was your affection but you wouldn't even touch him, CUDDLE THE MAN BEFORE HE DIES STARVED OF TOUCH
to make matters worse was you tried everything in your power to avoid him thinking you were in danger
poor guy had to chase after you trying to calm you down but to no avail
you'd tried hiding, screaming and even running away but he always came back
"Baby please stop, it's me, Jake. Layla's dad." he tells you making you go into shock
"HOW DO YOU KNOW MY BOYFRIEND'S DOG YOU STALKER?!" you yell at him as you hiccup slightly still drunk
you still didn't believe his words so you decided to call jake for yourself and somehow the phone in the stranger's pocket rang
"YOU ATE JAKE!!" you accuse him pointing at him in horror
"Oh for fucks sakes." he says done with your drunk self
🖇️ — 박성훈 ; SUNGHOON !
he was offended to say the least
"But (y/n) it's me, you're handsome and funny boyfriend. Snap out of it." he says shaking you lightly with his hands on your shoulders
you on the other hand was ready to fight because you couldn't believe this 'stranger' just laid his hands on you
"One more word buddy and I'll throw my shoe at you!" you warn your boyfriend slapping his hands off as you turn to leave
sunghoon was very adamant to get you to recognise him because he was your designated ride home anyway
"Sweetheart it's me, I'm Sunghoon!" he says again getting aggravated
true to your prior warning, you indeed took off your shoe and threw it at him
hoon woke up the next morning with a huge bump on his forehead and you couldn't remember a thing
"Where did you get that bump from baby?" you ask handing him an ice packing having no idea
he still wonders how someone so incredibly drunk had such great aim
🖇️ — 김선우 ; SUNOO !
"CAUSE IIIIII KNOW YA LIKE BOY!" you sing (more like scream) at the top of your lungs as sunoo directed you into the house
you had a few glasses of wine earlier on after working and sunoo was left in your care having picked you up after a karaoke night with friends
"Thank you for the ride mister taxi man." you tell your boyfriend getting out of the car
he was left very confused because he'd thought it was a joke at first when you got into the backseat and told him your address but he didn't pay much mind to it
"Sir why are you coming into my house." you ask trying to stand up straight to only lose your balance but sunoo was quick to catch you
"I live with you silly, I'm your boyfriend." he explains realising you didn't recognise him
"I already have one, his name is Sunoo, see." you tell him showing him your lockscreen of you and sunoo together
"Okay how about you go to sleep and your boyfriend will be right next to you once you wake up." he tells you gently brushing your hair
true to his words, you woke up to your sweet boyfriend right next to you still not realising he was with you the entire night
🖇️ — 西村 力 ; NI-KI !
as hurt as he was seeing you fail to recognise him, part of him also found it adorable
he knew he should've tried to help you sober up but watching you was like watching a patient who'd just gotten their wisdom tooth out and the gas had taken over
"Did you know I'm actually a secret spy, it's a secret but I'm telling you even though I've never met you before." you whisper looking around as if not wanting anyone to hear you
he would simply play along because he found this extremely entertaining
and this would be great content as birthday exposure
"And I have this super tall boyfriend, he's nine feet tall now." you say proudly not realising how ridiculous you actually sound
"You kinda remind me of him, only difference is you're much shorter... and he's way more handsome." you tell him mumbling the last part but riki caught on
it stopped being funny after you had made fun and complimented him at the same time and he realised you needed to stop with the drinks
he couldn't believe you were complimenting another man right in front of him... it was him but that's not the point-
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justwonder113 · 2 months
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Sharing a bed with Channie
Lee Know ; Changbin; Hyunjin; Han; Felix; Seungmin; IN;
My Masterlist
Summary: Chan is your rock, your guide your everything. He was also the the only person you could go to when you couldn't sleep. Warning: CURSING- I literally have no shame; GN reader, reader can't sleep. I Know I said it would be like one bed trope series but I feel like it isn't fully it? Like they lay in one bed for 5 minutes before point is shifted? Playful banter between friednds, Chan and reader are best friends and roommates. fluff, friends to lovers. Not proofread. Mention of burying yourself alive? A/N- I know I announced that I would write this eons ago but it took me more time thatn I thought it would. I had a clear vision but while writing this I changed everything like at least 5 times. I really hope you'll like it. Thank you for all the love and support you have given me. It means the world to me. Please share your thoughts with me and reblog. Also if you have any type of request please I'll be more than glad to write it. Word count-
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You were going to do this! You were not going to back down. You were not a coward! What could happen? The worst thing he could say was no. Big thing! You knew how to take no as an answer... No you didn't.. You would most probably die of shame if he said no. He wouldn't right? No, he is much too kind to deny you of such simple thing. But what if you made him feel uncomfortable? You would rather chew off your own foot than make him do something that makes him uncomfortable or make him uncomfortable yourself. He would tell you if he didn't want it right? You were friends. Quite close ones too. God you were friends! Of course he would find it weird that you wanted to sleep in the same bed. You had nothing explisit in mind tho. You just wanted to sleep next to him. You had trouble sleeping these days and it was starting to affect your everyday life, You were more groggy, more irritable, your head was in the clouds and you couldn't fully concentrate on anything. You tried everything to fix your sleeping schedule but nothing really worked. To say that you were despterate would be an understatement.
For the past 2 weeks the only time you slept peacefully and didn't wake up feeling like shit was when you and Chan fell asleep watching tv. It was the best sleep you had in a while, you woke up feeling like a new person. You were hopeful that you wouldn't experience trouble sleeping like that ever again but sadly nothing had really changed.
You couldn't help but sigh when you saw that it was almost 3 am. You had to get up early too and you had to be on top too. You were going to do it!
You got up from the bed, but before leaving the room you turned back and headed to the mirror. After making sure you were decent at least fifteen times you finally left the room. If it was any other of your friends you wouldn't even thing twice before heading to them, but this was Channie, your channie, the guy you had been hopelessly in love with since forever, but also a guy who only saw you as a friend.
You've read countless times that whenever a person came to their crush with the excuse that they couldn't sleep and/ or had a nightmare(in your case both) their crush always welcomed them with open arms. And they always ended up together after sharing a bed. If there was a fanfiction god you prayed things would go well or you would bury yourself alive and at least that would solve your sleep issues.
You were surprised to see that the lights in his room were on. Was he still working? You had to scold him later, he promised that he wouldn't work until late and would actually try and sleep.
You softly knocked on the door, but there was no answer. After a few seconds you knocked again, but also no answer. Maybe he fell asleep you thought. Feeling bad waking him up you felt bad you turned back to return to your room.
To say that you almost had a heart attack when you saw a dark figure looming behind you would be a severe understantment. You even fell back on your butt. Chan's gasp of your name made you realize it was him, he even tried to catch you but couldn't hold onto you on time.
"Oh my god are you okay?" Chan crouched down next to you, he held your face and carefully examined you while you tried to catch your breathe.
"I think I saw god for a second." You gasped out after a few seconds of gasping dramatically. Chan rolled his eyes at you before asking "What were you doing in front of my room?"
You stumbled for a second trying to find a perfect answer. While staring into his eyes all your courage from earlier had disappeared, you felt embarrassed about what you wanted to ask him. Also the fact that he was only in his pyjama pants didn't help at all. Like you also needed to be distracted by his Greek God body! "I wanted to get water and saw that the lights in your room were on." You couldn't be more obvious you were lying but you still hoped he wouldn't pry. Chan looked at you sternly before sighing. "You couldn't sleep?" You wanted to deny but the way Chan was looking at you, you couldn't lie. You could only nod, feeling disappointed in yourself. Chan looked at you for a second before grabbing your hand and leading you into his bedroom.
"What are you doing?" You couldn't help but ask, when he literally just casually picked you up and put you in the middle of the bed like a pretty decoration on top of a cake. He only told you to stay put and then left the room. You were baffled. You stayed put and only waited for him who quickly returned couple of minutes later with your pillow and the plushie he won for you when you were at the arcade. He instructed to you to get comfortable under the covers and then left again. He took a bit longer this time, but in a minute or two he was back with the cup of tea. Literally how could you not love him? He was so sweet and gentle with you. He really was the most beautiful person to walk this earth both body and soul. You were so touched by this that you forgot all your bashfullness? You leaned in and kissed his cheek. And the bashful smile he gave you?! The butterflies in your stomach were having a french revoluiton.
After you drank your tea, Chan took the glass from you and put it on his nightstang. "Are you comfortable like this? I can go back in my room." You couldn't help but ask. You felt shy laying on his bed next to him. Chan rolled his eyes and got under the cover. You two were so close you could feel his body heat without even touching him.
"I was the one who bought you here so stop overthinking and go to sleep!" Chan grumbled before wrapping his hand around your waist and bringing you closer to his body. You were chest to chest now and your heart was beating so strongly you were worried he would feel it. You looked up at him with wide eyes. "Christopher Bang Chan! What is this behaviour? What did you do to my shy best friend?" Chan smiled, "when was I ever shy?" Now it was your turn to smile mischeviously, "you're right you always were a little shit." Chan pinched your side making you yelp, you couldn't help but laugh at his distaste. "You're a menace." His voice was low, making you shiver. "Learned it from the best." You quipped quickly.
"Brat."
"You love me."
Chan waited for a second before leaning in and kissing the tip of your nose before muttering, "You're right, I do."
You started at him with wide eyes, unable to say anything. Your cheeks felt really hot. "What's with the heart fluttering shit you do? Be carefull Christopher or I might fall for you. What are you going to say about that?" Not going to lie you were dying inside wanting to know what would Chan say. Chan opened one eye to look at you and then closed it. You thought that he would ignore you, he cradled you closer to his body. Your face was against the crook of his neck. You felt like you could melt. You felt so warm and secure,the smell of his shower gel and the musky scent of his body really soothed you, you could even feel his carotid pulse. It was comforting his pulse was almost as fast as yours. Maybe you were deluding yourself but what if he felt the same?
The sound of Chans voice bought you down to reality." I would say it's about time, I've been flirting with you for ages!" What the actual fuck? You immediately jumped up and looked at Chan with the most shocked face ever. He's being doing what now?
"You've been flirting with me?" You needed him to say it again. You needed the clarification!
Chan opened his eyes and leaned up, you tried to read his expression but you got nothing. "Yes? Since forever? I'm surprised you hadn't realized."
"You like me?" You couldn't believe your ears.
"Yes? Why are you so shocked?" He sounded genuinely confused.
"Because I thought you only saw me as a friend and well you do have a flirty personality." -You tried to explain, Chris sighed and fully leaned up. He looked at you for a second before putting his hand on your neck and pulling you towards him. You thought he was going to kiss you and your heart basically did a backflip on top of running 500 kilometers per hour, but instead of kissing you on lips he softly kissed your forehead. When you opened your eyes whitch you hadn't even realized you had closed, you saw that he was looking and you with the softest gaze ever. You couldn't put it to words but it was type of expression that even if you didn't like him you would fall for him head over heels without a doubt.
"First of all you're literally the hottest person ever with even better personality. I would be a fool to not fall in love with you. So trust me my flirting was genuine. Now the second, you always flirted back, you weren't being genuine?" His question bought you aback and you started stammering for an answer but you stopped when you heard him chucke. "Okay okay I'm just teasing. I know you were being sincere. And I'm also aware you have a crush on me. It's cute actually. " His eyes twinkled with mischief as he teased you. You didn't know if you wanted to hit him or kiss him sensless.
"I hate you so much sometimes." You couldn't help but groan. You were feeling beyond embarrassed, both because you knew that he liked you back and because he had known you liked him. What an asshole why did it take him this long to say anything? Chan leaned in and placed another peck on your cheek, making you sigh quietly. "Your raging crush on me says otherwise."
"Oh shut up!" You did smack him on the arm this time. Chan's cuckle filled the room and you couldn't help but also laugh. You felt like a lovesick teenager but you didn't really mind it. Chan's one hand was still on your neck rubbing the thumb mindlessly along your skin, his warm hand not failing to send shiver aftee shiver down your spine, while his other hand was on your waist keeping you close to him. He acted like the thought for a second before muttering "Good idea." And leaning towards you, your lips so close they slightly grazed each other with each breath.
"Can I kiss you?" God were you dreaming? You even pinched yourself and you were awake! Fanfiction God really did exist apparently. You would have to thank them later.
Much to your dismay after kissing each other for so long that your lips were already starting to buzz Chan decieed to lean back. You chased after his lips, you didn't care that your lips were buzzing, you felt like you could kiss him until your lips fell off. You felt like you had been deprived of him all your life and you felt greedy now once you got the taste of him.
You nodded eagerly, making Chan's smile deepen. And he closed the distance. Chan, your lovely Channie, your best friend and closest companion, the guy you could trust with your life and your longtime crush was kissing you. And it felt beyond majestic. It was everything you had imagined and so much more! His lips were so soft, so warm and felt so nice against yours. Your whole body was like set ablaze and despite feeling so so many times today you felt like melting, like your bones were liquifying. Only he could make you feel that way. So confused and so hopelessly in love. You couldn't help but smile into the kiss, Chris mirrored it and soon you were full on chuckling between giving each other short pecks. You love how lighthearted and fun everything was with Chris but also very deep and meaningful and how he always made you feel so secure. Really, how could you not love him?
Chan smiled and gave you a short peck. Then he brought you closed to his body and hugged you. "I really like you, heck I might even love you, this might sound cheesy and I know your menace butt is going to tease me after this but be mine?"
What a dork. You hugged him closer and kissed his neck. "I think I also love you too. And I will tease you about it most definitely, but yes, I will be yours." Chan smiled with his pretty dimples fully on display, he kissed your forehead and then helped you get comfortable on his bed. You felt so calm and peaceful despite your heart still running like crazy, you could feel the sleep approaching. Oh yeah you had insomnia, how funny.
A/N- I really hope you liked it, I will fix mistakes later my eyes are burning at this point. Feedback and reblogs are greatly appreciated. Thank you for reading❤️
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ickie · 2 months
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♡ missed signals \ cl16.
pairing: charles leclerc x reader summary: best friends who have feelings for each other !! scary !! \ word count: 1.1k warnings: there's like 2 sentences of steam but they literally just make out idk ! if u don't like cheesy men or reader being oblivious ... this will not be 4 u !notes: i wrote this because i cannot sleep so if it makes no sense... blame the lack of sleep not me ! feel free to leave any feedback here !
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your fingernails dug into the plam of your hand, eyebrows creasing together as you stared at your best friend, the person that you would sacrifice anything for... hell, the person that you would go to jail for. you coud pinpoint the exact day things began to change, and that was the day that you friendship with charles had begun to turn into something far from platonic.
it was barley a year ago, you and charles had decided to go to a party, and maybe it was a bad idea when charles had been insisting that he needed the time to recouperate... but what better way to recouperate than with some alcohol and some quality time with friends and strangers alike?
♡♡♡
your hands had begun to get cold from the condensation that was forming on the outside of your glass, a pout taking over your glossed lips. "charlie," you drew out the last syllable, standing on your tiptoes so that he could maybe hear you over the music. "i'm bored." you hummed, head turning to the side as you stared him down.
"and what am i supposed to do about that, mon loulou?" he questioned back, raising an amused eyebrow at you as your shoulders shrugged at the taller male. "can we dance, do something please! i'm dying over here!" your dramatics didn't go unnoticed, charles letting out a laugh at your actions.
his hand grabbed yours, pulling you towards the crowded dance floor. your hips swayed easily to the music, the feeling of charles behind you wasn't foreign. it wasn't weird for best friends to be grinding on each other in the middle of a dance floor, right? because for you and charles, it definitely wasn't. the feeling of his hands on your waist caused you to throw your head back, resting it on his shoulder as the two of you danced until your boredom was somewhat satiated.
shortly after, though, you began to feel overheated - the alcohol you had consumed too quickly hitting you like a ton of bricks. "charlie," his nickname came out like a whimper, your cheeks flushing. "i'm hot, can we go outside, please?" you asked the question as you were already moving away from him, eyeing the door that led to a balcony.
you let out a relieved sigh as the cooler air hit your sweaty skin, hands coming up to run through your hair. "i dunno what happened," you laughed, leaning against the railing. "i was fine and then i got hot, and not in a good way..." you joked as charles slotted himself next to you, your head resting on his shoulders. your eyes closed, listening to him speak as you hummed out responses, only half way listening.
one thing led to another, and you found your lips on charles', you hands in his hair and his hands placed firmly on your hips, not letting you move away - not like you wanted to. the feeling of his lips against yours was something you hadn't really thought of before, but... they were something unlike any one else you had ever kissed. they were soft, gentle... and all you knew in that moment was that you wanted to keep kissing the boy you had considered your best friend.
charles pulled away though, a bit too soon for your liking as you let out a whine of protest. "i," he bit his lip, eyes flickering from your eyes to your lips and back to your eyes. you tried to decipher what emotion he was feeling, but his face was eerily empty. "we should go back inside." he stepped away from you, shoving his hands into his pockets. you stayed quiet, eyes finding the floor as you nodded your head. what the fuck just happened?
as soon as you got inside, you ordered yourself an uber, saying your goodbyes to your (very tipsy) friends who had tried to get you to stay longer, but you made up something about not feeling good, not like it was a lie, though. the feeling of regret, the feeling of unwantedness... it had you feeling sick to your stomach.
♡♡♡
"you wanted me to take that as a sign you had feeling for me?" the quesiton came out before you could stop it, a hand slapping over your mouth as you laughed. "you ran away from me, charles!"
"i was... embarassed, okay?" one of his hands came up and scratched the back of his neck. "i didn't want my first time kissing you to be on the balcony at some club, mon ange. it should've been something more important than that. but you really didn't think anything was different after vegas?"
♡♡♡
what happens in vegas, stays in vegas? or at least that's what they said... and that's what you told yourself as you led charles to your hotel room feeling the urge to congratulate him for making the podium.
his lips were on your neck as soon as the door was shut, your back snugly pushed against the wall. a whimper passed through your lips as his teeth grazed a sensitive spot, your hands pulling at whatever they could find purchase on.
"charlie, i need more..."
"oh, mon ange, you're going to get plenty."
♡♡♡
thinking back on the memory of vegas, you felt heat creep up into your chest and your cheeks. did you really miss these signs of charles trying to make moves on you..? there's no way, right? "what happens in vegas stays in vegas!" you counter, holding your hands up in defense.
"mon ange." he deadpans, a look of are you dumb? crossing his features.
"okay, okay... maybe i should've looked more into it but you know how i am!" you step closer to him, a hand reaching out to graze at his forearm. "but, charlie... if you really wanted to be with me you should've just told me..." you let out a giggle, pressing a kiss to his cheek. "or, i dunno, asked me on a date? or just plain asked me out?" there's a teasing edge to your tone, a smile pulling at your lips.
"i'm not doing that," he scoffs, his hands pulling at your waist to pull you close to him. "you're mine, mon ange... you might not have realized it, but, it's gonna be me and you for however long your willing to deal with me." he leans down to kiss you, but you reach a hand up to stop him.
"that was the cheesiest shit i've ever heard, charles." you make a mock disgusted face before dropping your hand. "but, you can kiss me now, if you'd like.."
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changetyre · 9 months
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THIS IS YOUR FAULT! || LN4 Ⓢ Ⓦ *Drabble*
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SUMMARY: You thought the hardest part of your unplanned pregnancy would be the lack of sleep maybe the nausea but you would've never thought the ridiculous increase in your libido would be what was proving the most challenging. (Lando Norris x Pregnant!Reader)
WARNINGS: ***Smut 18+***
A/N: This drabble is quite short but I am willing to write other parts of this couple if requested ;)
_______________________________
"This is all your stupid stupid fault." You whined as you spoke to your boyfriend on the phone after ranting to him for 10 minutes straight.
You heard him giggle on the other side which only made you angrier. "I'm almost home darling."
He reminded you of the fact he had literally only gone to the store down the street because you were craving some sour candies after Lando had eaten you out for the second time today and it was only 12pm.
"You're a goddamn professional driver for fucks sake it should only take you half a second to speed down the street in your stupid orange car and get back." You continued whining.
You felt like your body was literally screaming for your boyfriend to put his hands on you and relieve you from this need to feel pleasure...again.
"Baby I didn't take the car just to go to the store that is 5 minutes away walking." He laughed again.
"I hate you." you almost cried.
This is what the first months of pregnancy were looking for you, You thought that after being knocked up by your boyfriend by accident during your 2-year anniversary would be enough sex for a while but your body thought otherwise.
It was honestly ridiculous the frequency with which you needed to relieve yourself but you were incredibly thankful for the fact that you got pregnant on the penultimate race of the season and this horny symptom had only shown up after the season ended so you had your boyfriend home most of the time and for a few months.
At first, Lando was concerned with how needy you were even thinking something was wrong but after a visit to your OBGYN where she found his concern funny, she reassured you both that this would be normal and the antidote was pretty self-explanatory.
After this Lando quite enjoyed being so needed and being able to inject you with the medicine needed so often and initially for you it was fun too until it just started getting frustrating.
Yes, Lando had the exact skill set required to pleasure you exactly the way you needed repeatedly and bring you satisfaction rather quickly but the frustrating part was the fact that the satisfaction only lasted an hour or 2 sometimes even less, and sometimes Lando wasn't home to help which had you crying at times because relieving yourself was never nearly enough.
Lando had become such an expert at landing a helping hand that sometimes he would even be in meetings while secretly fingering you who would lay in front of him with your legs spread wide open. Sometimes he would even be eating you out while on a phone call shushing you when he would unmute his phone to keep talking.
"I love you too darling." You would've started crying if Lando hadn't come right through the door after this.
"FINALLY!" You called dramatically. "Eat!" You yelled pointing at your bare pussy where you had laid on the couch.
"With pleasure." Lando laughed setting the bags down.
"WAIT!" You yelled before he could walk forward. "I want my sour gummies." You extended your hand.
Lando could only laugh again at your antics reaching for them in the grocery bag and tossing them to you before finally kneeling down in front of the couch.
"Anything else M'lady." he joked.
"No, now eat." You pointed again in between your legs as you both began eating, you your gummies and Lando you.
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httpsghostie · 10 months
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Under one Roof pt 1
pt 2
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OK finally IT'S HERE
smh I'm down bad for roommate ghost I am sobbing
my hand is literally burning I wrote this aT COLLEGE
and YES my love language is food pls dont come for me
Summary: you never knew you needed a military roommate until you've got one.
Word Count: 1k (sorry it's short
Warnings: roommate!ghost x female!reader, slightly suggestive (if you squint), mentions of trauma, fluff/comfort, no use of y/n
masterlist
Ghost was an old friend of a friend of yours, and he happened to be needing a place to stay for a while, that ended up being a few more months, and now it's currently been a year since he moved in. He doesn't plan on leaving, you know it, you know that despite the independent man that he is, he likes having someone to come home to.
He was cold at first, so cold. And for many nights you cursed yourself for letting that rock of a heart get into your sweet home. He wouldn't talk much when he was there, you'd almost forget he was around if it wasn't for random coughs or sneezes.
That man smoked like a chimney in the first days he's spent around, he was anxious and that wasn't very cute, he was always smelling like cigarettes, but thankfully he didn't smoke inside.
He appreciated your effort on cooking for the two of you, but you couldn't help it. How could he survive when he wasn't eating properly? Yes, frozen pizza is cool… until it's the third day in a row that you're eating frozen and instant food and you can barely stand.
He also had a fucked up sleeping schedule that you just went along with it, you once got scared when you walked in the kitchen and found him just laying on the wall, eyes closed and snoring slightly. That day you scolded him to go back to his room and made him lay down on the bed.
"You're gonna lay down on this bed and you're gonna have some nice hours of sleep, alright? I'm gonna leave the door open, if I see you awake I'm punching you." You sounded like a mother, almost, and he was so tired he couldn't fight back.
And the days went by, he'd go away, he'd come back as tired as he left. But at least he was slowly opening up to be a really cool guy. You two started to bond, and the more he talked, the more you wanted to spend time with him.
Oh and don't even get started on dad jokes, he's cracking them up whenever he's helping with house chores, or when you two are eating peacefully.
He became a friend, a very good friend, one that wouldn't mind you venting out to, plus he was a good listener. He'd just sit there listening to whatever haze your brain was going through, and slowly he learned that he shouldn't be giving you reasonable ways to solve your problems, he should just tell you it would be ok.
And you found yourself slowly falling for him. Of course destiny had to put you together. Only if it wasn't for the way he handled things around the house.
"Oh, the living room lamp broke? Let me fix it."
"Those boxes are heavy, hand them to me."
"Go find a movie for us to watch, I'll do the dishes. Find a good one, though."
"Goddamnit, I told you not to be climbing on that fucking balcony, you're not a cat, you're gonna hurt yourself one day." Said as he picked you up when you were trying to reach the top of the cabinet. "Just ask me, I can reach it without putting myself in danger."
Or maybe if it wasn't for the fact that he'd purposefully get out of the shower with that pretty little towel wrapped around his body, that made you clench your fists. The way he was still a bit wet, a few drops running down his abs. He was surprisingly cool with his scars around you, maybe because you didn't make a big deal out of it.
That's because it wasn't. You expected that when Gaz, your friend, told you that the friend he was sending to you was his 'work buddy'. And he phrased it exactly like that. 
"Don't mind him, he's big and scary, but he'll be a good roommate, I promise, he's my work buddy." You chuckled when you read the text.
And yet Ghost didn't mind the stare of admiration coming from your burning gaze across the living room, when you thought the most ungodly things a brain has seen.
He started to become more and more warm, he found safe with you, like you could actually be his home. One night, he found a deep conection with you when you were casually drinking together, sat by the coffee table, playing video games. 
She should know the truth about me.
He thought. And that was the night he dropped his heavy armor. He told you the bare surface of his past, even though most of it had been blocked from his memory, like a dark spot he couldn't remember, and would die without trying to take a peak at it.
You cried, and he couldn't understand why you were crying until you said it wasn't his fault.
"It's not your fault, you didn't deserve any of this." You sobbed, hugging him close.
He broke down. Like he needed someone to reassure him that he wasn't the villain from his past. He realized what you meant to him, and he swore to God he would try his best to come home to you when he had to work.
Some days were strange after that, like he regretted telling you about his story. He had that feeling in his gut that you weren't looking at him the same way, like you were pity. He didn't want your pity, he hated that look on your face.
But that changed.
He had come home one day, texting you while he was at the airport waiting for a ride. You ran to get groceries and make him a good meal, but the only thing that came to your mind was the old recipe of lasagna you kept from your grannie.
That old lady, always saving your life.
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dashofmonsters · 6 months
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Dreamers & Delusions- Pt. 2
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Merman x Female Reader
"I'll have to go into hibernation if it gets too cold or if I can't find something to do. The acclimation program already knows about my kind and our issues with the cold so they have accommodations for winter," he explains.
"Well I hope it doesn't get too cold then, would be a bummer if I couldn't come see you," you smile at him.
Tao's eyes go wide for a second before he clears his throat, "Yes well it would indeed be a bummer... Especially since we have just decided to be friends."
"Right?" you beam.
You and Tao talk and talk almost to the point where it's just about silly things or what he's struggling with during his acclimation. You find out he's a very literal person who has issues the most with slang, metaphors, and emotes. He lives in a rental that's about a couple miles away from the beach and he usually walks to work or the local grocery store since he can't fit into normal vehicles.
After a little bit of work though you find out an even more endearing side to him, he likes to try his hand at cooking ever so often. Though he prefers his meat raw, he likes the idea of charring the outside and adding bits of flavor. He was a little embarrassed to admit it but you found out it's because his father was supposed to show him how to create a feast to impress a mate per tradition.
You didn't press as to why his father didn't teach him seeing he was already uncomfortable enough to admit it. So you decided to share a bit of something uncomfortable about yourself.
"My mom never taught me how to do a lot of basics that most parents are supposed to teach their kids. I had to watch a lot of how to videos and make myself look like an idiot if I messed up or didn't know something. A lot of people assumed I was stupid or had no common sense. I just didn't have a point of reference and I hated being ignorant but I was judged for my short comings and no one ever helped," you admit.
Tao nods and gives you his first, though very small, smile.
"Is that why you are forgetting things constantly?" he asks with the slightest smirk.
"Yeah...sure," you feel a bit embarrassed by his question, but you'll never confess that you 'forgot' those things just as an excuse to talk to him.
"I see, I will take that into account that due to your upbringing that you just don't think about these things and I will stop being annoyed by it," he nods.
"You were annoyed," now you feel a little hurt.
"Of course I was, but no more than I usually am," he shrugs.
"That doesn't sound fun," you grimace. "You can't just be annoyed all the time."
"I'm not annoyed when I'm at home," he says.
"Lucky," you laugh.
"Why? Are you unable to be at peace at home too?" he gives you a look of genuine concern then.
His number one thing seems to be peace. He's a no nonsense guy who just wants to go about his day with no hiccups. His life honestly seems perfect compared to your at times.
"Only when I'm sleeping or about to leave for work. Peace... that doesn't come easy to someone like me," you frown.
Tao studies you then as he drops to your eye level. You should feel super uncomfortable but for some reason you don't mind. He stares hard at your face and scans it until he nods.
"You do look very tired," he says.
You can't help but to laugh at his observation, "Tao, I'm going to let you in on a secret: I'm always tired."
"That is unhealthy," he scowls.
"Yup and there's nothing I can do about it," you shrug.
"Yes there is, you could go home and sleep," he says, almost ordering you to do so.
That's when you can't help but to crack up. It's horrible that this is how you cope, but it is.
"If I went home to sleep right now, my grandmother would give me an earful about being lazy," you laugh.
Tao doesn't laugh, he doesn't smile, doesn't do anything except stand up slowly and prowl over to you.
You shut up real quick thinking something is wrong until he picks you up. You yelp, being carried in one arm at his hip like a sack of rice.
"What are you doing?!" you squawk as you sway when he shifts to carry you princess style.
He doesn't say anything until he sets you down onto your tie dye towel.
"Rest, I'll make sure no one bothers you while you're here," he says.
You can't help but feel a mix of emotions then. Your eyes water a little but you swipe away any moisture before a tear falls.
"Thank you, that's probably the sweetest thing anyone has said to me in a long while," you smile at him.
And Tao in all his Taoness, just nods.
~~~~~~~~~~~
Tao really meant it when he said no one would bother you while you were on the beach.
The day after he said that, you had what was possibly the best beach nap you've ever had thanks to Tao brining you a beach chair with your name on it. Literally.
At first it felt weird that he'd go that far just for you to get a beach nap but you guessed it might be some cultural thing and as far as Tao said, you're his only friend. You thanked him and didn't think much of it until the day after that.
A group of teenagers were playing volleyball a little too roughly and one of the guys fumbled and the ball got you right on the head even though you did your best to dodge it. The boys tried to apologize but Tao gave them an earful about respect and being more spatially aware.
That too was normal for Tao though he was a bit harsher than usual. Unfortunately it got worse.
Yesterday was a blessed off day. No work, your grandmother was out thrifting to her heart's content, and all your bills had been paid. You were excited to head to the beach but that excitement was short lived.
The first thing you noticed was that your chair was pulled a little closer to the guard tower. Next was that Tao wasn't in the tower but leaning against the ladder like he was expecting some shit to hit the fan any second. And finally, the group of muscle hunks posing as they flexed for the cameras.
Apparently some magazine decided this spot was the perfect location for some weird gym rat protein powder ad photo shoot and to make matters worse, they tried to rope Tao into it.
Before you sat down though, Tao made a bit of a scene by scooting your chair even closer to the tower while making eye contact with one of the big buff dudes.
You told him he was being a bit extra to which he said he was only being cautious as they had been eyeing you since you started walking down the beach. You rolled your eyes, ready to tell him that there's no way they'd be interested in you until he thrusted a binder in your direction.
It was a detailed list of ingredients, dishes, and recipes commonly enjoyed by all saltwater merfolk with a few dishes his kind liked the most. You had almost forgot that he said he'd make this list for you so when he gave it to you, you almost cried.
You thanked him and started fanning through the pages and noticed his hand writing was especially nice on dishes that his people particularly enjoyed. You gave him a quick side eye and smiled.
These are probably his personal favorites, you think.
As you started to skim through the recipes with the neatest hand writing a shadow fell over you.
It was one of the buff guys.
He gave you the most generic social media fake ass grins ever and you couldn't help the eye roll. He started to introduce himself but was hardcore interrupted when Tao drove him into the ground like a fucking bull.
Tao and the buff guy started hashing it out until his bros came and peeled him away from the fight. It was the first time you really really saw Tao's teeth. Sharp and pointy like a shark's and then there was the spike like fins on his lower arms and legs. He looked like a mad dog ready to rip someone in half.
You heard one of the photographers comment on how territorial some of the fair folk can be with places or people they claim as their own.
If that was the case, then you guessed it might have to do with your friendship with Tao. If it wasn't, then he's about the get a stern talking to.
~~~~~~
"He was bothering you, I don't see why you're upset with me," Tao says after you lectured him about yesterday.
"I'm upset you dingbat because shit like that can get you sent back to your home realm! Do you think I want my friend to get deported over shit like that," you poke his arm, but it ends up being a jab.
Tao opens his mouth then closes it. He looks around a bit then let's out a long sigh "I'm sorry. I really don't know what's come over me. After I moved here, I didn't have my shoal. My sponsor checks on me maybe once every three months since he's been busy working with another merman who's been trying to get his pass here. I guess the loneliness drove me a bit crazy."
Now you feel bad for making him feel bad but you hope your gift will more than make up for it. You worked all morning long on it, double checking to make sure the meat was ready and perfect right before you left the house and that the sea greens were cooked and seasoned just right.
"Well moving past that, I brought you something," you take out the lunch box and show it to Tao.
He looks down right shocked as he goes to reach for it. He carefully removes the lid and his eyes stare hard at the contents.
"You made this... for me," his voice is soft and quiet and you can hear the pain behind it. He hesitates for a moment then takes a slice of the thin cut beef and pops it in his mouth. He closes his eyes and tilts his head back and swallows. He's quiet for a minute and you're afraid you messed up and he's too nice to tell you other wise.
"Tao if it's bad you can just tell me, I can take the criticism," you tell him, ready for the critical blow.
Instead he tilts his head back down and opens his eyes. The whites are now all black which makes his yellow irises pop even more so.
"My friend, if this was bad I would have spat it out," he grabs two more slices and then a few more practically stuffing his face like a kid who was caught with a bag of candy.
You watch as he eats everything, savoring every bite like he hasn't had a decent meal in ages. His harsh features soften as he takes the last bite and licks his fingers clean. For some reason you focus on him as he rolls the sauce off of his fingers and onto his tongue.
Bad lonely thoughts, Tao is our friend. Nothing more, nothing less.
"So was it good?" you ask, though you can probably guess the answer by the clean plate.
"If I was mermaid being offered a feast, I'd allow you the honor to continue courting me," he jokes.
"Oh what an honor," you laugh.
For the first time since you've met him he laughs back. You can't help but stare at him and feel a smile build up that hurts your cheeks.
"Thank you, really. I have tried and tried to create something that tastes like home but it was never quite right. It was either too salty or I over cooked the meat or the greens were under cooked somehow. This is pretty close to the flavors of my shoal. I didn't realize how much I missed this," he looks down at the empty lunch box with a mix of emotions.
Something in you feels for him. You haven't had a taste of home in forever but your problem is that you're pretty sure that it would make you physically sick instead of homesick. Home never felt like home, here didn't feel like home until you met Jessica and Tao.
Jessica made you her to die for pie for you birthday which you almost threw up from over drinking when she took you bar hopping for your birthday. Tao gave you an amazingly detailed binder of saltwater mer foods and recipes.
You can't think of anything better than food that brings all sorts of peoples together, human or the fair folk.
"Well, I can't do it all the time but I can at least make you a boxed lunch once a week, how does that sound," you smile at him.
"If it weren't for the fact that you're human and my friend I'd think you were trying to court me," he laughs. "But yes, that sounds good."
You play slap him and he laughs again.
~~~~~~~~~
"For the last time Jes, there's nothing romantic going on between Tao and I," you roll your eyes as Jessica gives you her biggest grin.
"Uh huh, sure girl. Maybe you don't see it that way, but guys don't risk getting deported for just friends and not just once. This is what, the second offence? He's lucky that he's, oh what did you say? A combination of a bookish mafia boss, the inspiration for the statues of deities and all around hotty mchot hot hot," she wriggles her brows at you before popping another slice of gum in her mouth.
You snort laugh, "I did not say that last one Jes."
"No, but you were thinking it," she raises a brow and twirls around till she's behind the counter.
"Listen, I can find him physically attractive and still not want more than a friendship. Plus he hasn't come onto me so I'm pretty sure he's not into me like that," you sigh and continue cleaning the table you just cleared.
Jessica hums something and clicks her tongue, "Girl you do know he's not human right? That he might have been coming onto you from the get go without you realizing it? Shoot for that matter he might not even realize it himself."
That has you curious now.
"What do you mean by that," you look over you shoulder to see Jes twirling a red curl.
"Oh you know, that the fair folk believe in fated mates and things like that," she gives you a cheesy grin and blushes a little.
You do know about the fated mates thing, it's one of the reasons a lot of fair folk, especially the guys, flocked to this realm in droves once the rift border opened up. With the fae it was pretty easy to tell once the bond clicked which wasn't always immediately. Their calm and calculated appearance would become wild and untamed. They would get quickly territorial and easily violent towards anyone who came close to their mate. A mark would usually show above the heart and a matching one would appear on their mate once their bond was consummated.
As for merman, no one had any idea what to look for since they just started coming this side as of a few years ago.
"Yes, I'm well aware about that. So what does that have to do with him not know if he's coming onto me," you ask.
"They know it deep down and act on it sometimes. They don't even realize they're courting you half the time or that they have this desire to want to be with you. It's hardcore ingrained into their DNA or something, I don't know. But it sounds to me that he is indeed into you. You're both just too oblivious to see it. Unlike Artek," Jes grins at the mention of her wild fae lover's name and sighs.
And suddenly her weird school girl crush behavior makes sense.
"Jes, did you and Artek.... Wait a sec, are you and-"
Jessica folds down her top just enough for you to see part of a swirling mark above her heart. She shakes in place with the goofiest smile you've ever seen on her.
"Just found out last night. Oh and he did not want to let me go," she places a hand on her forehead and feigns being scandalized. "But I have to go to work. He threatened to come in and tear Mikey a new one if he so much as thinks he can schedule me during my bond week," she give a vicious grin then.
The fae took about a week to celebrate their mate bond here, which was a much shorter version of their actual month long festivity of it. Mates were so rare on their side for some reason but here it was becoming as normal as two humans getting married. It just happened, but it was equally special if not more so.
Regardless, you were happy for Jes. Mikey tried to take everything from her in their divorce but got next to nothing after a detective brought in proof of his multiple affairs. That's why he's such an ass to her here.
"So, when's your bride feast huh? Gonna go all out," you turn to her and cross your arms.
Jessica goes into great detail about what she wants to do for the rest of the shift. That Artek has invited his large ass family this side to celebrate and that he's already started sourcing materials for their marriage bed. It was more than obvious that she's over the moon and can't get over the fact that she's found the one after years of dealing with a heartache.
Mikey tried to shut her down but several of the fair folk patrons snapped at him saying that it's a blessing that her and Artek found one another and he shouldn't discourage her happiness. His flustered face was priceless.
~~~~~
"Hey grandmama, I'm home," you shout as you slide your shoes off at the door.
Your grandmother's house is unusually quiet for this time of day when she's usually scrolling through her phone while listening to her soap operas. You look around and the livingroom is empty and so is the kitchen. You're about to call her when you see a note on the fridge saying Gayle has whisked her away for margaritas with the girls.
"Fuck me sideways and call me bob," you rake your fingers over your face in frustration. As much as you can't stand her normal antics you loath her when she's drunk. If you're lucky, Gayle will have her spend the night at her house until their hangovers wear off. If you weren't, there's a nice beach with your name on it.
Typically you'd go there after work but you're tired and you have the house to yourself right now. So you stretch and crack open the fridge and start preparing for a blissful night of snacking and binge watching some of your favorite shows.
~~~~
Hours pass and you get a text from Gayle that she's taking your grandmother home with her since she's had one too many and sends you a pic of your grandmother trying to put a dollar bill in a male strippers strap.
"Thanks for the mental scarring Gayle, just what I needed," you text back to her knowing she'll get the joke.
Gayle was a close family friend and was more like a grandmother to you than your biological one was at times. She was sweet and caring with a crazy sense of humor and infectious laughter. You sometimes wish you lived with her but she travels too much and she likes her alone time just as much as she like partying.
You squirm in your grandmother's recliner and grab a bag of chips getting ready for the next show until you hear a frantic knock at your door.
The bag flies out of your hand due to your shock reflex and you place a hand over your heart.
The knocking continues as you rush to the door to check through the peephole. You can't see nothing.
"Who is it?" you ask.
"It's me, are you ok," you hear Tao's voice.
You pause, not remembering if you ever told him where you live aside from the general direction. You slowly open the door and look up at him. He looks worried out of his mind.
"Tao, are you ok? You look like you've seen a ghost buddy," you ask him.
His hair is all messed up and he's breathing fast and hard, trying to catch his breath and his tan skin looks like he worried himself sick.
"You didn't come to the beach today. You've been coming everyday except when it rains. I thought something happened," he frowns.
"Oh uh well, no I'm fine. My grandmother is out tonight so I thought I'd enjoy a night in since this rarely happens," you explain.
"I see, ok... That's good then. As long as you're alright," he nods and sighs as he leans against the top of the door frame.
A crack of thunder peels off in the distance causing Tao to flinch. He looks even more worried then.
"Sounds like rain," you comment.
"Yes, I... I should get going then, I don't want to accidentally transform back to my other form while walking home. It'd be very inconv-"
Before he finishes that thought lightning bursts through the sky and the little misting sprinkle turns into a torrential downpour.
Tao groans and looks resigned as he's about to turn to leave but you quickly stop him.
"Hey you can stay here for tonight if you want to wait out the rain," you tell him.
He looks to you like that's possibly the dumbest thing you could say.
"That sounds inappropriate," he glares at you. "Inviting an unmated male into your house is never wise."
"Tao we're friends and adults. I'm pretty sure I can trust you to keep your hands to yourself unless you've had ulterior motives from the get go," you cross your arms and stare up at him.
"It is still unwise," he nods, being firm.
"Oh so then you do have ulterior motives," you raise a brow.
"I never said that," he grimaces.
"Then there's no problem if you don't. Come on, get your ass in here," you open the door all the way and beckon him inside.
You hear him groan as he accepts his defeat while walking in. He struggles with the low ceiling, well low for him as he shuts the door.
"Is this your first time in a human house," you ask, leading him to the livingroom.
"Yes, it's very uh small and compact," he notes.
You get the compact part as your grandmother is a bit of a tidy hoarder, the small thing, that's probably due to his height.
"Well mi casa su casa. Well more like mi abuela's casa su casa, but still, make yourself at home," you say then try to offer him something warm to eat and drink.
Tao tries to deny any offers but you snap back saying it's rude to deny your hostess the honor of taking care of her guest. Tao eventually resigns and you bring him a warm cup of tea. As you go to the kitchen to make him something to eat he asks if he can watch you. You agree and start pulling ingredients left and right.
You get fully into the zone as you start preparing the food. You glance over at Tao ever so often just to see that he's fixated on your process. As you start cooking you notice the whites of his eyes turn black again. He sniffs the air and his pupils dilate.
"Want to try a bite," you offer him a piece and he takes it with no hesitation and scarfs it down. His nails which are sharp and pointed seem a bit longer and more pointier now. His expression looks more predatory than normal and some of his spikey fins have started protruding.
Guess that means he's really hungry.
"Give me just a few more minutes and dinner will be ready ok," you tell him as you continue on with his meal.
Tao just nods and stares daggers at pan. You feel like if you let him he'd lunge at it with reckless abandon and eat everything in record timing.
After a little bit you scoop the meat into a bowl and hand it to him. He looks at it and takes in a deep whiff before carefully grabbing a bite. He looks like he's holding back going ham on the food and you're wondering if he's trying not to scare you by going into some weird merman feeding frenzy.
"Hey if you need to eat however you want to eat, go ahead. I can just uh go into another room if you want some privacy or someth-"
Tao grabs a handful of the meat and stuffs his face with it. His pupils nearly engulf his irises making his eyes look pitch black. He tears into the strips of meat like a crazed hungry animal. The juices and sauce start dripping down his arms and you roll your eyes at the mess.
"I'm going to get you a towel, that stuff'll get sticky after a while," you say as you walk towards to laundry room.
Tao grunts and consumes some more meat.
As you get to the laundry room you smack yourself over the head for having another bout of terrible lonely girl thoughts.
Tao, smack.
Is, smack.
Just, smack.
A, smack.
Friend, smack.
You should not be even more attracted to him after that feeding frenzy trance thing he just went in and yet you can't stop thinking about it.
"God, does that mean I'm depraved," you question yourself. "Or does this just mean I'm weird and anything goes right now in my lonely haven't had sex in ages mind?"
Probably a bad mix of both...
You sigh and grab a towel and turn only to be met with a brick wall.
"Oh hey, are you done," you ask, praying that he didn't hear you questioning your sexual sanity.
He nods and cocks his head and points to the towel.
"Yeah, um here," you hand it to him and he slowly but carefully cleans himself off.
"So there's a guest bedroom in the back. Bed is probably a bit small for you even though it's a king size. It gets cold at night since my grandmother has the a/c on a schedule so I'll bring you some extra blankets," you tell him as you turn to go show him the room.
He quietly follows you and steps slowly into the room, smelling and inspecting it. You leave him be while you go grab a large comforter and a few throw blanket for him. When you come back he's already curled under the covers with his feet barely sticking out. As you go to lay another layer over him he snatches you and pulls you into the covers with him.
You flail about for a bit until you hear what you're pretty sure in a purr. You kick up the covers to see Tao asleep now and honest to gods purring. He pulls you in closer and just cuddles you. He's mentioned a few times that when someone gets cold that his shoal will form basically cuddle piles to stay warm. Maybe that's it and maybe he's also really homesick. He said he can never go back though...
"Just this once, jeeze. Not letting you go into a feeding frenzy next time I give you food," you snort laugh and try to relax against Mr. Brick wall.
Tao shifts a bit till he's holding you close enough that you can hear his heartbeat. He moves the covers and extra blankets back up and slowly drifts back to sleep.
You're a little jealous of how fast he can nod off but eventually you start dozing in and out.
He's probably going to flip the fuck out about this in the morning. Well, we'll deal with it then...
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footballerimaginess · 4 months
Text
Baby Bellingham
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This is about a dream that I had and you voted for Jude. Jude Bellingham Word Count: 687 "I am so tired" you let out a loud over exaggerated yawn as Jude spins around on his gaming chair as he watched you. "How are you so tired? you literally only got up an hour ago." Jude looked at you with a slight hint of concern in his voice.
"I don't know, maybe I didn't sleep well. I have been feeling like this for a while now. I just can't seem to shift it at all and I don't get why" you sighed as you laid your head on the side as he walked over to you. "Oh really, you should have told me. Maybe we need to see the doctor?" Jude suggested. "What, no J. I am absolutely fine, I don't need to go anywhere. Maybe I am just coming down with something" you quickly dismissed the doctors suggestion. "Why not babe? You need to know what is going on, you're like a zombie these days and I am a bit worried about you if I am honest" Jude muttered as he sat down on the sofa beside you. "But what if it is bad? I am just scared, I don't feel myself and I can't seem to shake it off. Okay shall I speak to the doctor?" you asked as you stood up, feeling off balance as Jude caught you. "Maybe we should go and see the doctor now, is there something you're not telling me?" Jude asked again. "What would I be hiding from you? I'm fine" you mumbled, wanting this conversation to be over with. "Well we both know that you aren't, so`I want to ask you something?" Jude turned and faced you as you simply nodded. "Yes?" you glanced up and saw him nervously bit his lip as he was hesitant to ask you the question. "Is there a chance that you could be pregnant?" he asked bluntly as you opened your mouth to reply, but something triggered in your brain. "Oh fuck- how did you know?" you clasped your hands over your mouth as you felt a small tear escape down your face. "I just guessed and well I looked at the symptoms online. Shall we go and get you some tests or to the doctor?" Jude asked as he moved across as he wiped your eyes gently. "Get a test I suppose, how could I have been so stupid" you put your head in your hands as Jude kneels down in front of you. "Hey, none of that please baby. You weren't stupid or are stupid. Come here, we can do this together" Jude cuddled you tightly as he helped you up off from the chair as you headed to the car. The drive was only a quick drive, but it felt like it was taking forever to get inside and grab a test. "You okay going in?" He asked as you grabbed your phone and purse as you ran into the local pharmacy. "Got one, shit who knew there were so many types of tests in one place. My mind was all over the place picking one, so I just picked two because well guess they are better than none" you laughed as you both drove home. Once you got home, you made sure you ripped the test box open as you took the test. "3 minutes" you whispered as you placed the test on the counter as Jude slowly opened the door as he crept in behind you. "This feels like the longest time ever" he laughed as you examined the test in front of you. "Shit" you whispered as you watched as the digital test flashed right in front of you. "Oh my god" you pointed as you saw the test result changed as it said 'Pregnant 2-3 weeks' you gasped loudly as Jude watched the test as if the result was going to change. "Wow, we are having a baby" Jude whispered as he pulled his hand into your hand. "We are, I can't believe it. Baby Bellingham is in there" you mumbled as he placed his hand on your stomach. "Baby Bellingham" he grinned.
Would you like a part 2 or make this into a series until the baby?
Taglist: @screechingphantompuppy @ghwoticz
280 notes · View notes
Note
Can you write how Geo would deal with a mc that is always sick? (Totally not cause I'm sick too)
My Remedy for your Malady. (All x Sick! MC/Reader)
Anon. First and foremost, I made you wait 5 1/2 days. I am truly, wholly sorry for this *humbly bows*. (▰︶︹︺▰)
Secondly, I decided that I'm gonna do this for all 7 of our characters, because Jess, Brit and Deryl deserve more attention. I hope you may forgive me for my lateness, and enjoy this fic nonetheless (btw get well soon if you're not already <33).
Also I know that Jess especially is shorter (literally teehee) than the others, but I'm gonna get the hang of her eventually. Same with Deryl. >:]
ALSO, you're in an established relationship with them, so that's why they have (very legal) access to your residence!
- Signed by biggest-geo-oogami-enjoyer
Remedy: a medicine or treatment for a disease or injury.
Malady: a disease or ailment.
—---------------------------------------------------------------------------
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Geo was concerned when he found out you were ill.
When you didn't show up to school for the last few days, he texted you to find out why; to which you bluntly told him you felt like utter shit.
He doesn't pick up on the fact you're sick until you straight-up tell him.
Depending on what type of sick you are, he'll get the appropriate medicines/remedies and speed his way towards your home, hell, he might even skip archery, and he *never* skips archery.
Would rock up with food he knows shouldn't cause any problems or nausea for you and will probably make soup.
And you better fucking eat it.
He will feed it to you (reluctantly, but if you seriously can't do it yourself, then he'll manage).
Will ask you how the hell you fell ill anyway, and depending on your answer, he'll be either: Pissed (if you caught it from someone else), Or exasperated (if you stopped taking care of yourself or didn't equip yourself well enough to deal with the weather).
Will take care of you either way.
Will read to you in Japanese to help you sleep.
Will try to not lie near you if possible, unless absolutely needed. He does not plan on catching shit.
Will remain at your residence until you recover; unless he has classes that are either critically important and/or ones you're also in.
Will lend you his notes.
Will also take them back after a few days.
Will also just probably talk to you while you're bedridden, unless you cannot, in which case he'll simply watch you sleep, occasionally stroking your head and hair to try and comfort you.
He's trying his best, okay?
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Sol will freak when he finds out you're sick.
Doesn't care what he's got on next, he's gonna go take care of you.
Will probably feel bad for not telling Hyugo anything about suddenly vanishing
, but he'll understand right?
Will spawn outside your home with: - Medicine, - Your favourite comfort food (if you can eat it without the fear of vomiting), - Probably will bring poetry and art with him, so you both have something to do (that's not him) when you're bedridden.
Will try and hold you if possible, doesn't mind if he gets your blessed germs on him.
You'll have to tell him that you'd worry for him if he fell ill, so he'll respect that.
But he will feed you. You don't have a say in that.
You're being babied now.
He's gonna make sure everything you want (and can have when sick), you'll have.
Is honestly okay with not going to any class, he'll just ask Hyugo for notes if he hasn't been MIAing.
Covers you in blankets if you've got a cold.
If you have a fever? Ice cream. >:]
Essentially tries to uplift your mood as much as humanely possible.
This guy will do anything for you. <33
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Crowe will ensure that when he arrives at your home, you'll have everything you'll need.
Will cook your favourite food.
Will make you eat soup and light foods that are easy on the stomach.
Won't touch you, he doesn't want to fall ill, but will read to you.
He's got a soothing voice I just know it.
And he's 110% going to put you in a coma from how tired you feel when his voice hits just right.
Or maybe you're just fatigued because of your body waging a war against god-knows what kind of virus.
Will make you all forms of beverages to suit your illness, will also go out of his way to purchase any, after all, he's got the funding.
Will still go to classes, and takes extensive notes for you.
Will also tutor you the content if you're up for it.
Will stroke your hair if it's not sweaty, as a form of comfort.
Will make you feel as loved as possible.
Because that's what you deserve.
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Brittney will be appalled.
How did you get sick? More importantly...who got you sick?
She's gonna yell at them.
Or fight them.
Maybe both.
Will buy a bunch of goodies for the both of you.
She can't cook for shit, so she'll just get takeout as food and order a fuckton of cough drops and Panadol.
You're both gonna be painting each others' nails.
And spilling gossip. Oh my god, she always had gossip.
Will give you notes to subjects that are majors, or ones you share.
Other than that can't offer much.
Will sit away from you to not get sick, but she'll 110% be supporting you emotionally.
Will probably give you a massage when you get better.
Idk she gives the vibe that she would.
Is the most aggressively supportive girlfriend ever.
She only wants you to recover ASAP, and to feel as content as someone who's sick can be. <333
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Jess will be focused solely on you recovering as swiftly as humanely possible.
Is upset when she finds out you're fallen ill.
She'll drive to her home, grab the best shit she has and drives to your home.
Stays with you for days on end.
You've become her priority now, after all.
Jess is a very devoted (and lonely) girl, what can I say.
Will try and comfort you via reading to you, or listening to you talk about literally anything.
She just loves your company and you. Poor girl's been neglected her whole life.
She'll try her hardest to take care of you, and she does a very good job. (Ask Brittney teehee)
You're more than glad to have her.
And she to have you.
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Hyugo will be astounded.
You? Got sick?
Why?
Did someone make you sick???? (if so teehee someone's getting food poisoning~)
He's at your home, with everything.
Literally everything.
Blankets, movies, games, medicine, puns, your favourite food and whatever else he deems necessary.
Will hug you if you're not aggressively sneezing/coughing.
Will watch movies with you on the couch with you lying on his plush fucking thighs.
Says the most stupid shit in Japanese (such as teaching you how to hide a body) and making it sound like flirting.
Tells you jokes and puns to make you feel better, until you laugh too hard that is and almost die.
Will make food for you.
Will ramble on about random shit to you, or listen to you talk (if you can).
Literally just seeing you content is more than enough for him.
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Deryl will be SHOOKETH.
He will sprint to your fucking house. He doesn't care.
You're his only priority now.
Will magically appear at your home, and immediately hugs you.
You can be fucking dying, he doesn't care.
You're getting squashed.
Will be asking if you're okay 24/7
Until he realises he forgot to bring food.
Then he runs to get it, along with tablets, Panadol, all that jazz.
Like RUNS.
HE WILL RUN.
HE IS A FAST MOTHERFUCKER.
FAST!!!!!
Then he gets tired, so by the time he gets to the store, gets the food (and the 'goods'), he's gonna just call a fucking cab and crash at your place. (he forgot takeout existed lol)
He doesn't mind, and frankly, neither do you. The food and snacks was awesome (well, what you could eat anyway).
Will try his absolute best to take care of you, but often gets carried away with his energy. Often talks and rambles to you while you happily lay in bed next to him and listen.
Will call Geo or Jess for how to make a warm soup to feed you.
Then it becomes 'we've got Masterchefs at home'.
Shit goes crazy when Deryl's around tbh.
And you're more than happy to enjoy the ride (in more ways than one ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)).
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0blobthefish0 · 2 months
Text
Partygirl Part 2
leighton murray masterlist | main masterlist
Part 1
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Leighton Murray x Female Reader 1769 words
a/n - finally, it is here! i literally had this all written out except for the last part before the 17th, but I am incapable of writing cute date scenes, so this'll have to do 😅
You stir awake and your mouth falls open in a silent scream as you screw your eyes shut. Throbbing pain was incessantly stabbing at your brain, there was no way you didn't have any nerves in there because all you wanted to do was take the damn thing out. What the fuck did you drink last night, the whole bar?
Letting out a defeated sigh, you slowly opened your eyes and brought a hand to your head in an attempt to soothe the ache. Wait..
You froze.
Where were you? You questioned as your eyes adjusted to the dark. God, did you actually follow through with a one night stand? You could now hear, and not to mention feel, the soft puffs of someone breathing. You chewed on your bottom lip, nervously, as you wracked your aching brain for a solution. You nearly choke on a gasp when you feel a pair of arms tighten around your waist, pulling you flush against the other person.
Your eyebrows furrow - boobs? What the hell happened last night? And you almost feel proud of yourself until, you realise that you're still fully clothed, and now you feel horrified; how did you half fail a one night stand?
God, this was so embarrassing.
But then, you smell something familiar, expensive, and you finally pull yourself together enough to take a peek at the mystery person.
You hear yourself squeak and a hand flies to cover your mouth and you can't tell if looking was a good idea because, somehow, your heart is beating faster than it already was. You feel her hand slip from your waist and you feel as if your soul has lifted itself outside of your body.
"Y/n," you hear her croak out, her voice thick with sleep.
You let a stretched-out moment pass before replying, "Yes?"
"You okay?" She whispers softly, and you move to lay on your back.
"Yeah, I just- I wasn't expecting to see you there," you explain and Leighton can hear the nervous smile in your voice.
"You were pretty drunk last night," she recalls and she sees you wince in response. "There's some aspirin outside, if you want."
"Ugh, yes please," you say quickly.
You're sat on the sofa when Leighton passes you a bottle of water and an aspirin before taking a seat next to you. You pop the pill into your mouth and take a swig of water, smiling softly to yourself when you find that the bottle was already open. Your pounding headache seemed to dissipate instantly, it may just be a placebo effect, but you were thankful for it nonetheless, and you turned to her with a relieved smile.
"Better?" She questioned and you nodded your head. The two of you sat in a comfortable silence, just listening to the quiet through the darkness that no longer seemed so dark.
Leighton couldn't help but be thankful that the room was still dark, otherwise you most likely would have picked up on the pink tint that was dusting her cheeks. The image of you pulling her in close, your hands on her face, the way you looked at her with those drunken eyes and your voice when you called her pretty was all that she could think about. Goosebumps began to litter her arms as she shook herself out of her daze.
"I should probably get going," you announced quietly and Leighton turned to see you hugging your arms.
"You could always stay y'know? I'm sure your roommate wouldn't be too happy with you," Leighton inputted, "and you do live in the other building." You had to fight the hopeful feeling from growing as you turned to look at her; did she want you to stay? No, she was just being nice, anyone sane would offer the same.
"Really, you don't mind?" You smiled sheepishly.
"No, I wouldn't have offered if I did," she shrugged and got up from the sofa to stand in front of you. "But you need to wear something more comfortable first cause," you watched as Leighton eyed your outfit before lightly shaking her head and gave you her hand to help you up from the sofa.
Quietly, the two of you made your way back into the bedroom and you stood beside her as she rifled through her draw for something for you to wear.
"You can get changed in here, or step outside if you want," she whispered to you as she passed you a pair of neatly folded clothes. You nodded your head in reply, quickly spinning on your heel as soon as you saw Leighton reach for the waistband of her jeans. You took a moment to collect yourself and settle your nerves before swiftly slipping out of your dress and pulling on Leighton's shirt and shorts.
"Done?"
"Yeah," you whispered quietly and turned to see her slipping into the bed.
Leighton watched you as you moved closer to her; something about seeing you in her clothes was making her stomach erupt with butterflies, you looked cute. She didn't know why she did it, maybe it was the time of night, or maybe it was an unconscious decision, but she opened up her arms - inviting you in closer - and to her relief you accepted and crawled into her.
"I meant it, y'know?" You confessed and let out a slow yawn.
"Meant what?"
"Nothing, sorry, I'm just tired," you whispered sheepishly, your one second of courage quickly leaving you as soon as those words left your mouth. What you wanted to say, was that when you had drunkenly told her that she was pretty, you were being earnest. You felt Leighton nod her head above you and then the two of you slowly drifted off to sleep once again.
---
You saw Kimberly send you a small smile and you made your way to their table, food in hand.
"Speak of the devil," you hear Bela sigh out as you place your tray on the table and taking the empty seat next to Leighton.
"Why are we talking about me?" You questioned.
"Bela's in a mood-" Whitney began before being promptly interrupted.
"Why didn't you two fuck?" Bela nearly shouted accusingly.
"Woah-"
"Okay! No need to be so crass."
"Just because we both like girls, does not mean that we automatically want to jump each other's bones," you defended with a hushed voice, hyperaware of the people around you.
"Speak for yourself," Bela mumbled, upset, taking a not so discreet jab at Leighton.
"Hey," Leighton gaped, "you're the one that encouraged me!"
"Yeah, I guess I did. I'm just mad, my ship needs to sail; like you literally have all of the materials, get to building!" You shook your head at that with a slight laugh and soon enough the conversation drifted away from the two of you.
You took a forkful of your lunch before turning to Leighton, the movement catching her eye.
"How'd your quiz go?" You asked her.
"Uh- yeah! It was um," Leighton was struggling to hide her shock, she had only mentioned the quiz once, maybe twice, a week ago, "it went well," she nodded with a smile on her face.
She couldn't remember if you said anything after, too concentrated on the way that she was feeling and the way her face was heating up, so much so that she had to turn away and focus in on the conversation at the table.
---
The following week flew by quickly. You were resting on your bed, the relief of finally sitting the exam washing over you, when you felt your phone vibrate. You felt for it and at seeing the caller ID you squinted suspiciously.
"Leighton?"
"Hi."
"Are you.. okay?" You questioned with confusion; Leighton never calls you.
"Yeah, I- is your roommate there?"
"No, she wen-"
You stared, dumbfounded, at your dark screen. She hung up.
knock. knock. knock.
The fuck?
Almost cautiously, you get out of bed and tip-toe your way to the door before cracking it open ever so slightly and then swinging it fully open.
"Leighton? Are you sure you're okay?"
Standing before you, in all her glory, was Leighton Murray dressed to the nines like she always was whilst you stood in pyjamas. It wasn't even necessarily late, possibly just half-past six, but you enjoyed living in comfort.
"Of course, never better," she replied, moving into the room after you turned to the side to let her in.
In reality, Leighton had never felt so anxious in her life. If she hadn't called you on a whim, she most likely would have been back in her dorm by now. She spun around as you closed the door and, were those her pyjamas? She had let you keep them that night, and just seeing you in them was giving her whiplash to last weekend.
"I want to ask you out, on a date," she stated. "I know you said that thing a few days ago about how just because we both like girls we aren't automatically attracted to each other or whatever, and that other thing of people in a relationship should be in different friend groups, which was basically a big fat sign saying 'we're just friends', but you honestly make me feel insane and I can't stop thinking about you like all the fucking time and maybe, hopefully, you like me back or maybe I'm just crazy and delusional and all the signs are just figments of my imagination."
You stared at her with a growing smile as she ranted and now she was partly out of breath as she searched your eyes, and swallowed nervously.
You nodded your head tentatively and Leighton took a small step toward you. 
"I need you to say it," she whispered softly, the words barely passing her lips, her wide, Bambi-eyes on you. She needed to know it was real.
"Yes," you nodded again, "I'd love to go on a date with you." You saw as she visibly relaxed.
"When are you free?"
"Umm.." you began as you sifted through the busy days ahead for a potential gap.
"Now?" Leighton offered and your eyes snapped to her.
"I mean- yeah?"
"Great." You felt Leighton take your hand and begin to lead you out of your room.
"I'm not changed."
"You don't need to be, plus you look cute in my pyjamas."
"Yours? They're mine now," you grinned as the door shut behind you and the two of you made your way out of the building.
"Do you have a plan?" You questioned as you stepped outside.
"Drive."
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sugarcoatedcherry · 1 year
Text
void state progress and success!!!
I'm updating every day privately (now public) hehe
(scroll down and read pink highlighted paragraph for success story I had started attempting void much earlier than this)
day 1: tried but eventually fell asleep
day 2. did an extensive reasearch, like all day, read ton of success stories, got insane inspiration. believed void was real and manifestations are instant. I tried and got into hypnagogic state. but fell asleep
day 3: re read all the success stories again and again whole day and became more confident, I made mental notes on common symptoms I'd have, affirmed little. all night I played subliminals, binaural beats etc but got tired and fell asleep
day 4: still motivated, angry but persisting, I am affirming, made more mental notes on how I should go about void, did more reasearch on Hinduism interpretation on void, read about void on reddit, YouTube, explore astral projection and sleep paralysis video's comment section (they had similar symptoms just like void) became even more confident with void, tried methods but eventually i got exhausted and fell asleep
day 5: MADE MY OWN RULES. YES, no notes or anything, it's my way baby, it'll go how I want it to go, when I want it go. no more sending asks to bloggers, no more doubting, no more worrying the process. Just believing it will happen. not worrying about the circumstances. I'm very confident that today IS THE DAY 💅
day 6: I couldn't enter, i slept lmao
day 7: I got to the vibrational stage but my thoughts were distractibg and I slept
day 8: I learnt about sleep paralysis and tried that
day 9: last night didn't work, but I'll persist
day 10: i just slept, void is messing with my sleep schedule
day 11: spend A LOT OF TIME researching about void in Hinduism and got a lot of confidence but didn't enter
day 12: AGAIN SPENT A LOT OF TIME RESEARCHING about void in Hinduism but didn't make it
day 13: I'm getting closer to something very important and I need to enter void on a time crunch. I cried
day 14: everything is exhausting, but I still tried entering void but rolled over anf slept
day 15: i drank coffee to stay awake and I'm doing the meditation sitting up so that I don't roll over and fall asleep
(UGHHHHHHHHHH GOD )
day 16: I found a subliminal that made my body vibrate within first 2 minutes of listening?? and I looped it overnight but fell asleep sometime while listening but I'm still hopeful.
day 17: stupid exams
day 18: studied for my next stupid exams
day 19: I am so tired I didn't attempt I wanted to sleep peacefully
day 20: Literally my entire life is on hold because I am trying to get into void, I do realise this is unhealthy but at the same time I am so much confident that I can do it? I don't know how to explain this confidence but I know I will enter the void.
day 21: more exams and didn't attempt
day 22:
I DID IT GUYS I DID IT OMGGG THIS FEELS SO GOOD OH GOD JDKEODJDJDN I LOVE THIS FOR ME I FEEL UNSTOPPABLE I CHANGED MY ENTIRE LIFE THIS IS SO BIG TO ME Y'ALL DON'T HAVE A CLUE AHHHHH. I'M GONNA CRY. I HAVE EVERYTHING I EVER WANTED JSBSJDKDODKSNSN
quick thanks to all loass bloggers on Tumblr and Sammy Ingram (she shitted about void but it's okay lmao is her limiting belief but I'm thanking her for introducing the law to me) my fav bloggers are @rosellesworkshop @fleurlx @blushydior @stargirl-kira @multiversebaddie @zen-shu @prettymindset111 @luvforend @sa777urn @aphroditeapprenticee @gorgeouslypink @littlemissprettyprincess @sirensplayhouse thanks for answering my asks.
ANDDD all the anons who posted void success stories and thanks to @voidsuccess for compiling them!!! (i used to obsessively surf her blog day and night until day 10 lmaoo)
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hi!!! the sunshine anon requester! it was really well written💗 i don’t think they were out of character at all!! i would really second part, but no pressure, thank you so much for doing my request!
they were really fun to read too i was smiling the whole time hehe
Sunshine part 2
Hua Cheng x M!reader x Xie Lian
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Ty for so patient with me! Bare with me for this smut. I'm sorry 🙏. Still don't know how to write Rouye's name y'all.
NSFW!
Sunshine headcanons part one
Sunshine headcanons part three
____________________________________
They like to bully you they can't help it when you strive to be so good for them, when in bed you become a babbling mess...
You don't know what started it, but it happened. It was supposed to be a domestic day spent at Paradise Manor, until it wasn't. You and Xie Lian were bustling in the kitchen, trying to make dinner. Well Xie Lian was trying to make dinner... You were just making sure it didn't give you guys food poison.
Dinner flowed peacefully, you three were able to eat without throwing up so congrats! Xie Lian wanted to clean up, Hua Cheng insisted a servant would do it but Xie Lian insisted on it. Leaving you with Hua Cheng, who went ahead and whisked you to the bedroom so you both could wait on Xie Lian.
You let your hair loose, you don't plan sleeping with it up after all. Then you're stripping out of your outer robes. Just a normal bed routine. Until you feel cold hands slide over your shoulders and start nudging away the rest of your robes too. " A-Cheng, just what do you think you're doing" you giggle and smile at him. You turn to face him and his comes up to hold your face.
"Helping you get ready for bed, what else?" The night was doomed after that. The two of you fall into bed easily, like the many times you have before. Hua Cheng is gentle at first. Just caressing and kissing, his breath tickles your neck causing you to giggle softly again. Then he gets rougher, letting his desire start to slip in. Hua Cheng starts to nip and bite at your neck. He laughs in your ear when you start to whine.
Hua Cheng sits between your legs, his lips move lower and he starts to attack at your chest. His teeth catch your chest and you tug at his hair in a 'hurry' gesture. "Since when were you so impatient?" He chuckles likely in your ear.
You huff softly, another whine. Hua Cheng is being slow this time. Usually he's faster, rougher, and quick to bully you. He comes up to kiss you. "I'm just feeling impatient tonight" you sigh against his lips, and he nips at yours. "Oh my, well who am I to keep you waiting" he hums.
He spreads your legs, and moves down in between them. You chew your lip when he starts to bite harshly on the inside of your thighs. Hua Cheng licks the mark after, a false apology. A blush covers your face when he starts peppering your thighs with kisses, then your hips, but not where you want him to be. "Baobei pleeease~" you whine, and tug softly at his hair again.
His eye flutters up to you when you call him so dearly, "So whiny in bed my dear." He's right but you know that he likes it, they both like hearing you whine in bed. He hums and finally goes where you want him to go. He kisses over your hardness, and licks softly at the tip. You lean back on the pillows and your hand finds its way to rest in his hair.
Suddenly he's taking your dick down his throat like it's nothing, without giving you a moment to adapt to the feeling he's bobbing his head and hollowing his cheeks. His efforts cause a delicious moan to rip from your mouth and to tug on his hair. Hua Cheng has always been good in bed, the better - or worse for you - part is that he can't breathe. Meaning there's no reason for him to pull away and take a break for breaths. Very often, he spends nights sucking the literal soul out of your dick.
It's hot and sounds messy, and it is messy. Especially with Hua Cheng slobbering over your dick like that. It's not long until your fingers fist in his hair, you back arches under him and you're cumming for the first time tonight. Hua Cheng has always bullied you, so he doesn't give you room for a breather. He continues his efforts on swallowing your cock, immediately pushing you into overstimulated tears.
It's not even the worst he's done, you're just that type of person in bed. Oddly quick, you get submissive and teary. Which makes it easy for Hua Cheng to get you to babble. He continues to rip moans out of you, and you're close to a second orgasm when Xie Lian walks in with a smile. As if it's normal to find your two lovers in bed like this. It is for him actually.
"I turn my back for a few minutes and look at what has happened" his soft laugh reaches your ears. You quickly reach your hand out to him and he sits at the top of the bed by your head. He runs his hands through your hair and peppers kisses across your face. You get distracted in his affection but just as quickly you're ripped out of it when Hua Cheng swallows around your dick and your cumming again. There's no mess, Hua Cheng loves the taste of you.
You're left gasping, and arching against the bed once again. Xie Lian only smiles and peppers kisses across your face but he isn't saying anything so Hua Cheng continues his ministrations without pause. You guess his hands got bored because you soon feel fingers prodding at your hole. A pause. He moves his mouth off your dick and you can finally breathe. "Gege can you hand me the oil, please?" Hua Cheng smiles innocently at Xie Lian as if he hasn't got you like this.
"Of course" Xie Lian is practically encouraging Hua Cheng when he passes him a small bottle of oil. He acts like your savior but that's only after he willingly watches you get pushed over the edge multiple times. You whine knocking your head back against his legs. "Traitor." He laughs softly and moves himself under you, so that your head rests on his thighs. He bends down and kisses you, and you whine into his mouth.
While you're distracted with that Hua Cheng puts oil on his fingers and prods at your hole again. He chuckles when your body shivers. He uses two fingers at the start, and has memorized where your prostate is so he's already bullying the sensitive spot. You gargle on a moan, against Xie Lian's lips. Overstimulated tears run down your cheeks and inevitably your body starts to squirm. Xie Lian moves back, unlike Hua Cheng you two need to breathe. He holds your hands though keeping your upper body still.
That does nothing for your clenching thighs around Hua Cheng's hand though. There's no room for him to focus on your dick too. "Darling open your legs for, San Lang" you're quick to listen and you try keeping your legs open. When Hua Cheng runs at your prostate again you can't stop them from clamping shut again. "I c-can't m'sorry, I'm trying" you cry and he kisses your forehead, shushing you. "It's okay I'll help you Baobei, I'll help" he purrs.
And Xie Lian, oh Xie Lian that traitor helps him out. You groan softly when you feel a familiar bandage wrapping around your thighs and forcibly spreading your legs apart. You gasp and shiver when Hua Cheng forces your cock down his throat again. You choke on another sob when he starts to suck your dick and bully your prostate at the same time. Your vision flashes white, when you're quickly brought to a third orgasm.
Your moaning is quieted down by Xie Lian's kisses. It's helpless however when it comes to Hua Cheng. A sob of overstimulation rips from your throat when Hua Cheng's fingers start rubbing faster against your prostate. You cry and whine, pitifully. You can't even close your poor legs, your thighs shiver under Rouye's soft silk. Hua Cheng always achieves his goal however and you start to babble. "A-Lian I can't- I can't" you whine against his lips, the pleasure making you dizzy. "It's too m-much"
Xie Lian hums and takes a minute to think, a minute Hua Cheng used to make you cum for a fourth time. The time intervals between your orgasms are getting shorter and shorter. Sad for you, good for Hua Cheng. "Poor y/n, San Lang you're bullying them too much, don't you hear?" He laughs softly, in fake sympathy. You garble a moan when Hua Cheng in fact does not look but continues to press and rub at your prostate like it's a damn fun button. This continues until Hua Cheng brings you to your fifth release.
You gurgle something unintelligible and your eyes roll to the back of your head. Your hands grip Xie Lian's robes while your body convulses for a short minute. When it finally washes over you, your body falls limp and pliant. You pant softly, tears stream down your cheeks while you babble about something incoherently.
Xie Lian leans over and he has to pull Hua Cheng by his hair to get him to stop devouring you. "San Lang, no more. He's all tuckered out, look at what you did" he reprimands San Lang but he knows damn well that Xie Lian enjoyed watching you come undone. He obeys though and moves out of between your legs. "Poor Baobei, I got carried away I suppose" he chuckled.
You feel the silk leave your thighs, and your legs fall against the bed. Now that you can breathe without Hua Cheng and Xie Lian stealing it from you, you can get your thoughts together. You don't quite recollect what happens after San Lang pulls away though. You feel someone cleaning you up. Then you somehow got in the middle of the bed. And now all three of you are under the covers. Xie Lian, Hua Cheng, and you tangled in limbs. Making today another good day
____________________________________
I hope you enjoyed reading it because I enjoyed writing it! 🥰🖤 Tell me what y'all think!
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azfellandco · 9 months
Note
Hi friend this ask is a request for you to wax lyrical about Crowley slowly dying of a poisonous dose of laudanum, because it seems That Scene is still on all our minds. <3
Godbless (they said agnostically). This is going to be a mess of a response because I have been working a lot of overtime and am pretty sleep deprived, and also because there are a lot of angles to this.
First off: you're so correct to point out that laudanum is an analgesic and not literally a poison, because I think this slots in so nicely with the pattern of stuff we see Aziraphale consume and why (food and wine, for sensual pleasure) and stuff we see Crowley consume and why (alcohol for numbing and six shots of espresso to brace himself, and now laudanum, a medical grade numbing agent, at a dosage that would have killed Elspeth had he not intervened).
To really get into this I'm going to have to talk a little about something I have a lot of approximate knowledge about: Victorian era medicine. Why I find poison sexy (maybe compelling is a better word here) is partially tied up in the Victorian era and this exact subset of knowledge, which I am going to disclaim right now as not very precise. I research stuff primarily to regurgitate it in fiction, and not for complete factual accuracy.
First off, let's take a moment to admire Crowley's prognosticative abilities once again.
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Antiseptic is 25 years off, germ theory is held in disdain by the western world, but here's Anthony "that went down like a lead balloon" Crowley just trying to be helpful to this guy covered in blood.
Antiseptic was not in common medical and surgical use until the 1850s. It was pioneered by Joseph Lister, who actually worked at the University of Edinburgh, which was kind of the place to be in terms of medical breakthroughs of this time period. Before the advent of washing your hands and sterilizing surgical equipment, something like 2/3rds of surgical patients died either on the operating table or of infection afterwards. Medicine during this time period was difficult, dangerous work with a high risk of complications, and surgery was haunted by death and disease. Dr. Darymple would have administered laudanum to a patient and then strapped their limbs down and put something in their mouth so they didn't bite through their tongue before cutting into them, and even if he was a good surgeon they might have died a week later from gangrene or sepsis anyway.
It's in this world that laudanum and opium more generally got romanticized by literature and poetry. The Victorians loved opium, but the symbolism of the poppy, from which opium is derived, has been sleep and death since the classical world. My go-to example of the blending of these themes (poppies as sleep and death symbolism and this time period's interest in the classical world) is The Garden of Proserpine by Algernon Charles Swinburne, of which I will include an excerpt below:
No growth of moor or coppice,          No heather-flower or vine, But bloomless buds of poppies,          Green grapes of Proserpine, Pale beds of blowing rushes Where no leaf blooms or blushes Save this whereout she crushes          For dead men deadly wine.
The symbolic connection between opium (and thus laudanum) and sleep and death is my strongest association with either drug. The poppies = death association is used all the time even in the modern day. See this song, Flowers, from the musical Hadestown:
Lily white and poppy red I trembled when he laid me out "You won't feel a thing," he said, "When you go down" Nothing gonna wake you up now
Poppy symbolism is doing a lot of work in this song, actually, drawing a line between virginity and death, and the flower imagery standing in for both Euridyce's sexual relationship with Hades as well as her death but I disgress.
This is my personal context for laudanum and opium. I think it's encouraged to read the sleep and death connection into both of these medicines, both by the artistic tradition that arose contemporaneously with their use and by continued references back to it in the modern day. I am thinking of the scene in Inception where the opium den they visit is full of people who go to be drugged in order to dream their lives away as just one of many other modern day examples. Opium is sleep and sleep is death.
So while the laudanum is not literally poison, I think there is cultural context in which it is possible to read it as symbolically poison, regardless of whether Crowley's not-actually-human body should be able to withstand it. I think that it is compelling to read it as such, given the above-mentioned pattern of Crowley's habits of consumption.
I've seen a lot of posts about how the next time Aziraphale and Crowley see each other after this flashback is the time Crowley asks Aziraphale to bring him holy water and Aziraphale refuses on the grounds that he won't provide Crowley with a suicide pill. While I think this says more about Aziraphale than it does about Crowley (Crowley has never struck me, by behavior or attitude, to be the kind of person who would kill themself, whereas for Aziraphale one of the worst things that could happen would be losing Crowley) there is something there, something in that tartan thermos, something in the idea that Crowley would drink his death.
There is one more angle to this, and this is going to be a bit of a reach. I once read an analysis post in another fandom about the symbolism of poison as a choice of weapon. This line will haunt me until my grave: "a man stabs, a woman poisons". Just as a sword is a phallic symbol, poison (to me) is a feminine coded way to kill another person. For more context, please read The Laboratory by Robert Browning, a poem about a woman procuring a poison to kill her husband's lover, written by another Victorian poet. Crowley dying being discorporated by self-administered poison compels me for all the reasons mentioned above but also for gender reasons. Nonbinary icon.
Crowley dying being discorporated by self-administered poison feels like it is in conversation with two events that happen chronologically later but narratively earlier: the "suicide pill" conversation and Crowley trying to wait out the apocalypse in the bar after the bookshop burned. For all intents and purposes he seems to have given up at that point and only pulls himself together because Aziraphale appears to him and proves he isn't gone gone. It makes sense as an exploration of Aziraphale's anxieties (the suicide pill convo), and the extent to which they might be justified (Crowley drinking as the world ends). It's interesting it's compelling it's symbolically rich it's consistent with characterization choices in the show.
I think realistically Crowley would keep from Aziraphale that he was in pain until he physically couldn't do so, because it would threaten the wall they've had to erect to keep each other safe to do otherwise, but in a scenario where Crowley was hurt, properly hurt, Aziraphale would find a way to excuse them because he would not stand for Crowley suffering.
Just...
The idea of Aziraphale gathering Crowley close in the dark graveyard, feeling him stumble, Crowley who is so bright and brave and beautiful reduced to clutching to Aziraphale and the pair of them trying to will him back to health the way they can choose to sober up, and failing... Crowley because by this point he's too weak, he waited too long putting up a front for Aziraphale, Aziraphale because of conflicting magic or because he's too anxious, his own personal moment of the gun shaking in Crowley's hands during the bullet catch, where he knows what he has to do but he can't do it, can't trust himself not to make it worse.
And then Crowley's body going cold, Aziraphale holding it and crying because despite knowing it's just a body and that Crowley can get another one, he failed to protect him. Crowley died for someone and Aziraphale couldn't prevent it. And the things they don't say to each other, all rushing in to fill the silence left by Crowley's stopped breath. Aziraphale whispering to him, kissing his temple, part of him wondering if he'd ever be able to do this if he wasn't already gone.
It would just be really good, okay. It would be really good.
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he-calls-me-kitten · 2 years
Text
His Darling Apprentice
Solomon's growing lust for his precious student GN! MC.
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He thought it was curiousity and nothing more - this unprompted desire to see you every day. And you didn't disappoint. On the days he couldn't make it, you made sure you did.
Even if it was for 10 minutes between two classes, or dropping by Purgatory Hall on the weekends - your daily meeting was inevitable. He didn't realise how addicted he'd grown to it until it was too late.
It was as if his day didn't end until he had seen you atleast once, smiling and waving as you called out his name, rushing toward him when there was no need to. He wasn't going anywhere. He had simply grown fond of you, he decided.
It got worse, the more you became physically comfortable with him. Resting your chin on his shoulder to read his latest research, tackle hugging him when you finally got a difficult spell right, falling asleep on his lap during late night study sessions. On the days you didn't touch him, he lay sleepless at night.
⚜️
"Solomon! Right here, I've saved you a seat!" You waved to him as he entered the cafe. He smiled and let his body guide him.
It was such a natural thing now too. Whenever you both were in a room together, he'd come sit with you. And you never once, forgot to keep a place open for him.
"So this is the place Asmo is working at?" Solomon flinched at the overwhelming sweet scent in the room. You laughed. The best laugh he's ever heard.
"Yes it takes a while to get used to." You explained. "What else can we expect from a place that only serves desserts anyway, right? Oh there he is! Asmo!"
Solomon followed your gaze to see Asmo coming over to your table, holding two pink drinks on his tray. "Both my favourite humans came to see me! I'm so grateful to my beauty!"
"That uniform looks adorable on you. Is it comfortable?" You said, reaching out to touch the puffy sleeve. Asmo's response was a blur. Solomon's hand twitched involuntarily.
No, touch me instead.
He was shocked at his own thoughts. You literally live with seven other demons who fawn over you endlessly. He didn't think twice about it. Then why does he care now? And why was he imagining you in that cafe uniform too?
"Now here's the deadberry swirlie you two like so much. I added extra whipped cream for you, MC." Asmo winked before someone else called for him.
Solomon sipped from it, the sour and sweet of the drink refreshing his overcrowded brain. "It tastes as good as we remember it, doesn't it MC?"
"Yes. Just a tad bit too much whipped cream though." You laughed as you tried to clean the mess you'd made.
All around your mouth and fingers, dripping down your chin, traces lining down your neck and- Solomon shook his head to snap out of it. But you licking away at it was not helping his depraved spiraling thoughts, as he imagined something entirely unholy.
"Oops, you've got some on your chin too." You reached toward him, a dainty finger wiping off his skin. Your touch felt like a pleasant burn as he watched you lick your finger right after.
You realized none of it, but it was harder for him to keep up a conversation the entire evening.
⚜️
"Ah finally over!" You sighed in relief. "That was the longest assignment we had this term! Ridiculous! It's almost 2 am!"
"Oh come on, I'm sure you've tackled similar things in the human world." Solomon said, setting his paper down after the last revision. He chuckled to himself seeing you in such cute cat-themed pajamas.
"I doubt anything in the human world is tedious enough to make both Simeon and Satan fall asleep trying to finish." You said softly, glancing at the angel and demon asleep in their respective places at the shared table. You had kindly draped some blankets on them.
"Well atleast Operation Study Sleepover can conclude now." Solomon said, preparing to get up. "Now you go sleep on the bed, I'll take the couch, as decided."
He caught you pouting. You had really insisted on taking the couch instead but after a 3-2 round of rock, paper, scissor - you had to give into his rules instead. He tucked you in bed and watched you from the couch, making sour faces at him. Giving him the better blanket wasn't enough for you.
How can someone be this adorable?
He drifted off to sleep watching you twisting and turning in bed, trying to get comfortable. And when he woke up, there was a whole other suprise waiting for him.
"M-MC..." There you were, snuggled tight in his arms, under the same blanket. Your legs were draped over his. The weight of your thighs were nerve-racking and delightful. He felt your arms wrapped around his waist, your breath tingling the bare skin over his collar-bones.
He felt himself harden at your touch, your breath and your lips so close to his. He could lean over an inch and kiss you. Could he possibly dare? What if you hated him for it? No. He couldn't take that chance.
But he couldn't stay here either. He was bursting for release. He softly chanted a spell and found himself in the bathroom. Leaning against the cool tiles, he jerked himself off. The first of many, as he would discover soon.
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