...now I have acid reflux.
At least the lasagna was good.
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When someone treating someone with an eating disorder says shit like…
“Your BMI is fine”
“What’s your BMI?”
“Your weight isn’t that low”
“Your maintaining your weight so you must be doing something right” (when I informed my psychologist that I had been eating less intentionally)
“Your weight was never that low”
YOU CAN NOT TELL THE SEVERITY OF SOMEONES EATING DISORDER BASED ON THIER WEIGHT!
Also the equation used for BMI was invented when they gave people heroin for coughs…
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i be in my own head fighting for my life
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Wild things I have learnt in therapy:
When a child cries, parents are supposed to comfort them, not punish them
Parents are, in fact, supposed to want to spend time with their children
Children too have a right to privacy, meaning parents are not allowed to read their diaries etc and then punish them for the thoughts they found about
Children are allowed to be upset and cry
Children don't have to earn the love and attention from their parents by performing various things
Children are not supposed to be scared of going home and/or their parents
Children are not supposed to be physically abused and even a little bit of hitting is actually physical abuse
Parents are not supposed to expect that children are mentally as mature as other adults
Children are not supposed to be told that they're an accident, a burden, or something the parents regret
Children are not supposed to be scared and ashamed of themselves or feel like failures because of their parents
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my toxic trait is thinking I can learn something I’ve never done before like play guitar or crochet in 2 hours or less and if I can’t it’s simply because I’m just not good at it
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Don't mind me, just another day in quasi recovery
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When I remember how I was told I should weigh myself once a week to “keep my recovery on track”
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"You’re so polite" thanks i was raised in constant fear of upsetting people.
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Having survived abuse from people with mental illnesses, I know the urge to warn others to be wary of those mental illnesses. I know how often it can feel like that is your only power in life…the only action you can take against what you went through. But listen. Just because a mentally ill person caused you complex trauma, doesn’t mean you get to generalize and slander and malign every person with that mental illness.
You do not have to forgive your abusers. but you do have to heal without spreading stigma and misinformation. you do have to heal without antagonizing or dehumanizing others who are also just trying to heal. you have to help break the cycle. because nobody can heal alone.
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Me: *Goes.to the gym with the main goal of strengthening my arms and back*
Me: This is gonna be great! That arm that's been a bit weaker since it needed a screw and nerve surgery will get completely caught up to my other arm! It seems to be as flexible as it was before the surgery, finally, so I mainly just gotta worry about building up that muscle!
Me today, still recovering from sore muscles: *Tries to.straight both of my arms*
Left arm: *Is sore, but fully straightens*
Right arm (the one that broke and needed the screw and surgery): *Is also sore, but also feels stiff and won't get even close to my other arm*
Me: ....did my arm just take a huge step backwards?! Is it going to go back to being able to straighten again, once the soreness fades, or do I need to go back to physical therapy?! 😬😭
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People need to understand that for those who have gone through trauma experience things differently.
If you went through an abandonment as a child, a breakup others would get over with in months can take years to overcome.
If you went through domestic abuse, even small changes in a loved one's tone can make you anxious.
If you were belittled your whole childhood, being professionally critized at work can feel like the end of the world.
Trauma effects us for a long time after it occurs.
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