#we still get them but he like just isnt saying them outloud

[androgynousfool]

AU where Hannibal's monologues are all in his head and they stay there

#we still get them but he like just isnt saying them outloud #yeah? #makes sense? #you do not need to say that #no #they dont need to hear you ranting on if life is worth a rats ass #they already know the answer #keep it to yourself #hannibal #hannigram #nbc hannibal #hannibal lecter #will graham #william graham #abigail hobbs #beverly katz #jimmy price #that brian guy #brian zeller #bedelia du maurier #i think #im pretty sure #jack crawford

[ill-say-this-fast]

hey! since the poll ended a while ago, i would like to give my two cents in-

If the general public or the twin's social circle found out about their relationship, how badly would everyone react? Would it be like a pre-HOM situation where everyone is tryna persecute the maximoffs? how would the kids (Billy, Tommy, & Luna) play a role in all this? (and yes, let us all finally acknowledge that these three kids are (long-lost) siblings) #sc*arletv*s*on fans feel free to rage hehehe

Thanks for the ask :) theres a lot to say

In their close social circle I dont know how many people are actually shocked. But suspecting something youd never say outloud and being publically told it are different. It would be a negative reaction generally. I feel like superheros have got better things to do than actually attack them for it, exclude, sure, make nasty comments about, some people probably, but no ones gonna try and arrest them I dont think (definitely not pre-HOM 'maybe we should kill them' ideas). As Toby's said, Wanda's friends might be worried about her, especially those of them that dont like Pietro. But none of them are likely to accept it comfortably if she tells them she's happy. She might get quietly pushed out.

Now its different if the general public find out (who have less reason to already think it). That'll cause a lot of outrage, and the angry crowd will always be louder than the crowd that don't care. That demands a PR response and some of the other heroes would be obliged to either publicly denounce them, argue that its fine and there should be no legal consequences (unlikely), or argue that the evidence is fake.

Frankly Wanda and Pietro should probably be arguing that the evidence is fake. I imagine Wanda would just pretend nothings happened and try and go about her life. A lot of her social circle who were already doing the same about their suspicions might continue to. I can see a lot of the avengers doing that, especially if she's still working with them cuz she's a big asset as well as a friend. But the xmen and that lot, the periphery social circle, who like her less, are much more likely to take the opportunity to attack her.

Pietro doesnt have a lot of friends to lose. Or a lot of good public rep. I do think he'd tailor his general response to fit with Wanda's even if he wanted to tell everyone to go fuck themselves. I see Wanda wanting to keep out of the spotlight (this isnt a wrong of hers to earnestly take accountability for and make right, it's one of the most important things to her heart that people want to insult), and Pietro taking the spotlight for them if she thinks either of them should make a public statement. He'd get in a lot of scuffles about it, especially if people are saying unkind or crude things about Wanda to him to goad him about it. Magneto is more likely to be his problem, either gonna deny it or blame pietro but almost certainly deny especially publicly. Maybe hed try and set Wanda up with other people he approves of more like in ultimates lol.

Wanda wouldnt want to stop doing her helping people job even if the people were horrible. I cant see her running off with Pietro to live away from any hate really, even if he might prefer that. She'd rather negotiate (or magically influence) her way out of a prison sentence if anyone actually managed to bring a legal case against her and keep working even if that means alone now. Maybe move her official domicile to new jersey or rhode island or wherever cuz it wouldnt be a legal crime there even if everyone still hated it. She'd be sadder and lonelier but people leave her that way a lot and she keeps going.

The only thing that might get her really set against other people is if they start bullying her kids. They still have the shield of being magically created even though everyone's gonna be theorising they're Pietro's. (I can see Vision taking the opportunity to blame her and the kids being someone elses for their marriage problems which would add fuel to the fire.)

Billy would hold onto the magically created thing both as a public defence and internally cuz he would not want to think of himself as an incest baby, he might step away from Wanda for a bit to collect himself but he does idolise her. It would be good for him to get over that idolising and appreciate her more as a real person with human flaws and struggles and not his favourite celebrity, and maybe this situation would be a way for that to happen. Or maybe he'd get over the incest first and things would stay the same. Or maybe he'd so not get over it that he starts to feel negatively about her instead. I don't like that but it's possible for him. Especially if he's recieving negative attention, he doesnt handle that well, but also he's a baby god how many people want to test him.

Tommy would definitely fight people bad mouthing him mom in public. He's not worried about protecting his own reputation, he doesnt have a particularly good one and he sets himself against other people easily so what they think is worthless to him. I don't see him being bothered about Wanda and Pietro's relationship. Its more likely to drive him closer to his mom (and dad) because he's setting himself against the people who are against them. People giving him a hard time is nothing new, and he's gonna give worse back because he's vengeful like that, and he can blow things up. (Tbh I'd like Billy and Tommy to argue about it, that would be fun.)

Luna would be far less affected because she isnt their kid, just Pietro's. And she's more than used to people saying bad things about her dad. In-marriage doesn't seem to be taboo for Inhumans so thats not gonna bother her. Maybe the other kids at her school try and bully her about it, but she's more than capable of spilling all their secrets which might keep them in line, and as I said, it's not about her like it is her half-brothers. At the least though, it's another nail in the coffin for Pietro not getting custody if he tries to again.

#i feel like theres so much more to say #especially general public pr wise #also if anyones looking for the poll i deleted it bc really a post like this was more what i wanted to say on the subject #still interested in other peoples additions #maxicest #txt post #answered

[jwsflower]

Five

SYNOPSIS: You’ve been bestfriends and crushing on jungwon since middle school, but the day you planned to confess to him he never came to school. Later finding out that he had moved schools without telling you. Few year later when you had moved on you heard that theres a new student. You didnt think much of it, but...?

Pairing: Jungwon x fem!reader

Warnings: none that i can think of but lmk if there are any!!

It was 6am and you heard your alarm ringing.

“Ugh im not looking forward to school today at all, i have to ask Mr. Choi if i can switch groups with someone” you thought outloud.

When you were ready you texted the gc to ask who can pick u up.

15 minutes later you heard a beep outside and that was ur sign to walk ouside.

“Morningg sunny, tysm again for pick me up today” you smiled at him.

“Ofc its nothing Yn, do u wanna get some coffee before school??” he asked u

“Ohh yeah sure lets gooo” you replied

We both go into car and started to drive to Starbucks. You guys were driving in comfortable silence but then he spoke up.

“Hey, but are you okay after yesterday?”

“Yeah, im okay im atleast glad that chae and hoon explained themselves cuz i woulve been very upset if they lied to me.. “ you spoke up.

“Yeahh..” Sunoo dryly replied.

But little did you know that deep down Sunoo still thought that something was suspicious about both of them.

*time skip them already arriving at school cuz im lazy*

“Were heree” Sunoo spoke up brightly.

“Im not excited abt today at all, i have to ask mr. Choi to switch groups with someone else bc im not working with Jake.” you replied

“Good luck with that..” Sunoo laughed

“Thanks.. okay lets go to class now” you said that as you started walking into school.

When you walked into school you didnt expect seeing Yang Jungwon standing right next to your locker.

“You gotta be kidding me" you said under breath.

Before you could say anything Sunoo spoke up first. “ Ay Yang what are you doing here, Yn is not interested to talk to you rn. “

“Please I really want to explain myself and talk to her” he was basically begging.

But then you spoke up “ Jungwon i made it clear to you yesterday, give me time and maybe. just maybe im gonna give you a chance but please rn leave me alone”

“Okay, ill give you time just tell me when. Im gonna be waiting for you” he said that as he was walking away.

“Really yn? ur gonna give him a chance” Sunoo asked.

“I never heard him out, so maybe it wouldn't hurt hear what he has to say to me. And also im long moved from him so this isnt some pitying my crush thing. “ you replied

“Whatever you say Yn.. but now we should go to class” he pulled you by hand.

But deep down you thought, ‘ have i moved on tho ‘ you weren't too sure abt that part.

previous || masterlist || next

note: Okay hi, its been quite a white since i wrote a chapter (like 3 months). Honestly i wasnt busy or something, its just i didn't have any inspo for a long time and i just didnt want to write something confusing or dumb so i just took time off. From now on ill try posting whenever i can but i wont be doing 2-3 updates cuz i feel pressure so ill post whenever i feel like and try to not disappear again. Again Thank you if u read this and thank you for waiting.

Taglist: open! (send and ask tba)

Taglist: @hiqhkey @enhacolor @she-is-dreaming @lovienikitty @lauvvai @ch0ijiung @wonieleles @enhasengene @harperwasstaken1 @heartj4yn0 @lil-iva @yvesismywife @brokeprimogems

#jungwon #yang jungwon #jungwon x reader #yang jungwon x reader #enhypen #enhypen smau #enhypen imagines #enhypen fluff #jungwon smau #jungwon angst #jungwon fluff #jungwon imagines #enhypen x you #enhypen social media au #yang jungwon x you #jungwon x you #jungwon social media au #yang jungwon smau #.💗 my first love

[bakugousbabygirl]

Toxic Aizawa Headcannons

genre: angst i guess?

pairings: aizawa x fem!reader

cw: || cheating || jealousy || cursing || manipulation || overall toxicity ||

A/N: this is kinda short, but i might do more of these and make them longer and add scenarios at the end. idk

SFW

• he's a scorpio.....that shit is toxic enough on it's own lmao

• but fr everyone seems to have this image he's a patient caring man and i mean he is, with his students

• but you? no

• you're an adult, you should just GET things but you don't which frustrates him beyond belief

• you're his partner, not his student he shouldnt have to baby you

• i also feel like aizawa has a thing for younger women, he's 31 and he likes his women in their early to mid 20's

• i feel like that isn't inherently toxic but the way he uses your younger age against you most definitely is

• when you get in an argument he throws it in you face calling you childish and stating how he should've just dated someone his own damn age

• shota definitely prioritizes his job over you, will stay out late at night patrolling. he will stand you up on dates to go to hero meeting and even be gone for weeks on missions without contacting you

• luckily toshinori and hizashi are nice men knowing how their colleague and friend is so they send you updates about him to keep your mind at ease

• this causes a lot of fights. he questions you on why you're talking to his friends, he wants you to stay out of his personal life. you try to rationalize with him that you are apart of his personal life and needs to start acting like it. if he's gonna be gone for long you tell him the least he could do is give you a heads up

• he argues back that you should just KNOW if he hasn't shown up he's gone for hero work and should be content with that. he tells you that you KNOW what you were signing up for when you started dating so why are you trippin now.

• he never yells but his tone becomes really harsh and his words cut like blades tearing you apart cutting you down until you feel so belittled that your argument isnt worth it anymore making you grow quiet

• he'll glare at you and make a few snide remarks before leaving like a upset father after scolding his daughter

• definitely avoids you afterwards, i mean he doesnt come home for a solid 2 weeks after and you dont get any updates from hizashi and toshinori because he told them to but out of his business

• when he comes back he pretends as if nothing ever happened, he already said what he had to say. why rehash it? and if you're really still hurt it's just gonna reinforce the fact he thinks you're childish and thinks he should've dated someone his own age

• speaking of people your own age if he catches you texting or hanging out with a guy your age he's gonna be pissed

• "what am i not good enough for you, you think i'm too old or something!?"

• like no bruh we were just having a friendly conversation what's your deal, PLEASE get over whatever complex you have dude

• I feel like aizawa would definitely judge the way you dress lmao

• with alternative fashion coming back in style you have a stab at it and start dressing like an e-girl because it's the easiest look to manage

• aizawa laughs his ass off at you saying how that isn't true alternative fashion and calls you a poser

• yeah yeah aizawa is a fuckin gate keeper, you can't tell me he wasn't emo back in the day

• tells you to change and never dress up like that again because it makes you look like some cheap cam girl

• if you ever try to walk away when hes scolding you he will use his scarf to tie you up making you sit down and admit you're wrong

• he's the type to stress that communication is key but doesn't communicate himself

• its more like he talks and you listen if you haven't gotten that by now

• he refuses to open up to you and keeps you 100% separated from his work and personal life

• probably makes fun of your trauma, nothing too fucked up like if your parents are dead or anything. hes not that much of a douche, but if its something like your sister use to lock you in the dark cold cellar at night and told you a monster was gonna get you he'd definitely laugh

• would even go as far as locking you in the basement closet to see how you'd react

• also gaslight you using your age against you saying how he knows more because he's older

NSFW

• wanna start this off by saying aizawa is defo cheating on you with midnight lmao take that how you want but he is

• when you catch him he just says it's not that serious and it just happened because they have history together and shes more mature and experienced. he said it wont happen again so why cant you get over it, stop being so childish

• i have a feeling he'd probably complain about how annoying you are to her during pillow talk 😹😹

• he's the type to keep a straight face when you're giving him sloppy toppy to give the illusion that you're underperforming and can't satisfy him but in reality his toes are curling and he's doing his best to hold back his moans because your head game is out of this world

• definitely is the dominant one and he'd laugh in your face at even the slightest mention of you taking over ( he does let midnight dom him tho😒)

• it was this one time where you asked could you ride him so he allowed it, you got on top of him and just when you were getting into the groove of it he rolled his eyes flipped you over and growled in your ear saying to never waste his time like that again

• when you try to initiate sex with him laughs at your cute efforts of trying to seduce him saying he's too old for that stuff to be appealing to him

• he'd use sex to take out all his frustrations on you

• it seems hot but not the way he does it, he'll have you in his lap infront of a mirror as he pounds into you while degrading you

• it starts off cute and light with just calling you things like his pathetic kitten but then the insults start getting a little too real saying how he could go find a better girl with a cunt just as tight as yours who doesn't annoy him and how you're such a bitch and you can't nag at him now that you're stuffed with his cock

• yeah needless to say you start crying and hit his ass with the safe word making him stop and he just rolls his eyes and mutters to himself about how the younger generation is so sensitive and kinda just....leaves you there to mope

• also yeah theres never any aftercare even after particularly rough scenes like that he just showers then goes to bed and expects you to do the same

• and it's not like he doesn't know with aftercare is, i mean he's banging midnight our bdsm queen he knows what aftercare is but just doesn't see you as important enough to be that intimate with

• if you do something that turns him off during the middle of sex and kinda just pushes you off of him and goes to sleep on the couch and won't have sex with you for a while

• drags himself at all types of late nights and early mornings crawling into bed with you whole you're still sleep and kisses you're shoulder saying to himself outloud "i'll do right by you one day"

#aizawa smut #aizawa sensei #aizawa imagine #aizawa x you #shoto aizawa #bnha aizawa #aizawa x reader #mha fandom #mha fanfiction #mha angst #mha #mha x y/n #mha x reader #bnha angst #bnha fanfiction #bnha #bnha imagines #bnha x reader #aizawa headcanons #mha drabble #mha blog

[almostdeath]

Ok. This is...kind of a sketch...like I said I can't write fully fanfiction but here you go! I just want them to have a family dynamic. And yes...this is probably super OOC.

-Quackity...why is Schlatt here? Wasn't he a tyrant and...dead?-

Foolish asked, looking at the former president of Manburg, who was looking around, inspecting the buildings with a skeptical look, holding a glass of whiskey in his hand. Quackity sighs, trying to avoid direct eye contact.

-We made a bet....and I lost. So...he stays here...for a while...till I revive him...-

-Revive him? but that's JSchlatt---

-So, who build all this?-

the horned man asks, taking a sip from his glass and continue to...admire the buildings...

-...Me, I build it.-

Foolish says, rather fast...faster then he wanted. Schlatt just nods.

-Looks good. Majestic, you are clearly good at this, you have any degree in such things?-

-....Well...no...actually I am a God, you know...but thanks...-

this came out quietly and less fast then the previous statement, the God was truly flustered. He didn't expect a compliment to his skills, especially from a dictator.

-God? Not bad. Must be a advantage...

-What...against enemies?-

Foolish was ready to get defensive but then heard the answer.

-no, for building. You know, the whole...flying thing...or whatever is your power, I don't really care.-

Schlatt just shrugged, took another sip from his whiskey and continued to walk around.

-dont let your guard down...he may be charismatic, but don't let him fool you...-

Quackity said quietly. But Foolish didn't listen, his skills were appreciated!

***

The whole casino didn't look to bad either, maybe this a place that he could get used to...

-Hello, JSchlatt from Manburg.-

The ram-hybrid almost spilled his drink...almost. He focused his gaze on the strange young...guy?...he had a shap of a guy...but the former president couldn't be sure.

-And...who are you?-

-Oh! I am human...this you can tell by looking at my..completely human form!-

-....Yeah, sure. Whatever you say. And does your human form have a name?-

-Of course! Charlie...this does sound human, right?-

-Well, yes, I assume.-

This time, Schlatt tried to get away from the conversation as fast as possible and continued his journey, hading towards the balcony, he clearly needed a smoke.

-See you later. Glatt from the afterlife gym.-

The man stopped for a moment, how did this...definitely human know about the gym...he decided to question that later and tried to get to the balcony even faster.

-He saw me as a human!-

The slime-boy was just happy that he could convince another person that he is human....

***

Stepping on the balcony and finally getting some fresh air...that isn't really needed for a ghost...but still...Schlatt saw another person and sighed outloud, stepping closer, but still keeping the distance. This person seemed strange...netherit armor...and...oh...it seems, that its Sam...Schlatt does remember him. He lights his cigar, looking down at all the other buildings.

-Seems like you are still "guarding" someone.-

-....You could say so.-

The creeper-hybrid seems to be as calm as always, but his voice gives away some notes of worries. Schlatt stays quiet. He isn't someone who starts "soul to soul conversation"...even if his state as a ghost would mean that every conversation is like this.

-Did you ever....regret, doing the right thing?-

Sam is the one, who breaks the silence, not looking at the former president. The ram-hybrid answered with a laughter.

-Regret is something for people...who are wrong. Isnt it?-

-...What if those right actions hurt the one...that you care about?-

-Eh...what do you mean?-

the ghost inhaled the smoke of his cigar and let lit out after some seconds, it wasn't the same after his death...but it still gave a satisfying burn.

-...You remember Ponk?-

-...The name seems familiar. Eh...the strange guy, who always followed you?-

Schlatt could have sworn that he heard a very quiet chuckle from Sam...those were rare...even extinct.

-Yes...that one....I chopped his arm off...I had to...I needed him to understand that he can't mess with the prison...that nobody can mess with it. That it can get dangerous and he didn't understand it...I......am I a bad person for doing the right thing?-

-I don't think so.-

The answer was so quick and determined that the creeper-hybrid almost thought that he only imagined it. He didn't think that someone would really understand.

-I mean...I didn't order to execute Tubbo just because I am a sick fuck. I mean...that's part of the reason, but I also couldn't everyone think that they could just betray me and get away with it. I think...you did the right thing. Maybe....he will understand that there are sacrifices that have to be done. Sometimes they cost a life...maybe even your own.-

Schlatt let the cigar fall from the balcony and emptied his glass fully, letting it stay on the table nearby. He left, giving Sam the silence and time for thinking that he clearly needs. As soon as the ram-hybrid thought he is done with new encounters, he sees a familiar face...and familiar fox-ears.

-Fundy.....so you are on Quackitys side, heh.-

Schlatt smiled and tilted his head a little bit. The fox stayed quiet, tried to formulate a sentence in his head...he thought so much about a future conversation, but now...when he has a chance, he can't bring himself to say anything.

-Well....I guess, this time I kind of follow your dream, right kid?-

Without any hesitation and even without sarcasm, he just petted Fundy on his shoulder, making his way further.

-See you later.-

Fundy continued to stay there, looking in the direction where Schlatt has gone. He really wanted to say something...but right now he didn't know what and how he could do it. He wanted Schlatt to change his ways...but..right now...after all what he heard from Foolish and Slime...and the little parts of the dialogue that he heard from the side of the balcony...he begins to question...does Schlatt really have to change...or do they all just need to see his point of view...

#point #dream smp #jschlatt #schlatt #ghost schlatt #quackity #dsmp foolish #dsmp #dsmp glatt #slimecicle #slime charlie #awesamdude #Ponk is mentioned #its fundy #fundy #family dynamic #las nevadas #I know its OOC but I dont care #JSchlatt as a father figure for everyone #kind of dadschlatt #I want him to be a character with more depth #Not a Awesamdude apologist but I can see his

[ascaryghost]

3 4 7 if ur comfy !!

ty for the ask! im too comfortable hahah, therefor this giant block of text lolol

(putting keep reading so u dont have to scroll through it all if u dont want to)

3. whats ur fav way to selfcare?

bc im very depressed i do things like force myself to sleep somewhere uncomfortable for no reason or force myself to like play a game when i rly wanna quit bc i cant handle my thoughts and other stupid stuff like that but some nights i shower, warm my little pillow in the microwave and go to sleep (before 2am) under double blankets and that feels like the best self care i can do right now i it.

4. tell me ur most vivid memory, good or bad.

my best vivid memory is of my grandfather. i was about 10. our entire family was sitting around a table on my grandparents poarch and we had finished dinner. My little brother had left his seat to play and i dont think my dad was there but i dont rly remember. The sun was going down and i sat with my back towards the sun, next to nobody and across of my grandmother. My grandfather, sitting next to my grandmother had been drinking a bit. He never drinks too much, never gets drunk, just some wine and sometimes a shot or two. He just gets happier when he drinks. He's a bit of a grumpy old man. He cries a lot, tbh he's probably depressed. He's not good at telling people he loves them with exact words but when you get to know him you can just tell. He'll say "i like you a lot" instead of i love you, and when he gets some alcohol in his blood he gets a little happier and more loving. We were all having fun and i enjoyed sitting there in the sun talking to the grown ups, especially bc my grandfather was in such a good mood. He pours a glass of wine and says;

"When you're 18 you have to drink with me."

My mom casts him a nasty look, her baby daughter is NEVER as much as looking in the direction of alcohol! But then he starts crying and says;

"if im alive by then."

nobody says anything, bc my grandmother thinks him crying is annoying and my mom is mad still but i tell him

"oh you will! You'll live forever."

and i dont remember if i said it outloud but i promised to myself that if he died id drink a glass of wine by his grave when im 18. Im turning 18 in 6 months and he is still alive.

7. whats ur fatal flaw?

vanity. i was gonna say my thoughts bc i dig myself into holes of existential dread but tbh vanity. I do rly care what i look like, i never used to i think its mainly bc ed and then wow growing up as a woman yay my entire worth is in my nonexistent beauty but yea its important to me to look however i wanna look and obviously it might be fatal bc this damn ed has me wanting to look like a skeleton so ye. im probably not gonna die by suicide so idrk my brain isnt rly fatal.

[richietoaster]

Review/Reaction of IT Chapter Two

Let’s just start right off the bat and let me just say that Bill Hader better get a fucking award for his performance.

Alright. Here we go y’all. im trying to stay in order with what happened but so much happened in the movie that my brain is just all over the place so excuse me while i try to form words

UNDER THE CUT CONTAINS MAJOR SPOILERS

• first opening scene is a fucking LOT okay like i sobbed my eyes out and it was just not cool. adrian and his boyfriend? CUTE AF. Him getting brutally beat up and then killed by Pennywise while Don just watches? NOT CUTE AF

• Mike is a precious boy and I love him so. He cares about his friends so much holy shit. they all get mad at him for lying to them tho.But he only did it to protect them. Mike knew some SHIT(tm) our boy is so smart?? I’m glad they kept to his original storyline

• Older Bill gave himself so much shit this film and i just felt so bad. like we know it isnt ur fault okay?? We know you loved your brother, stop putting yourself down. also?? him becoming protective over dean? please stop my aching heart. 

• Jessica Chastain owns my whole heart and she can kick my ass anyday. She plays Bev so well and captures young bev’s personality so well. her scene with mrs kersh was very weird. i knew the second she ran naked in the hall i’d be seeing some weird fucking shit okay 

• Jay Ryan could kick me and I would personally thank him like?? wow what a man. He immediately recognizes bev when he first sees her and im just?? im happy. so many hidden new kids on the block reference and it had me fucking rolling in my grave

• JAMES FUCKING RANSONE MY DUDE OH LORD okay listen. he gives off young eddie’s panic and chaotic energy so perfectly i felt like i was watching him as an adult, who just never grew up. I think thats what he was going for honestly. He played eddie SO FUCKING WELL 

• I’m so sad about stan. THats all you need to know okay. I’ll talk about his letter later on in this. Stan deserved better. that’s all. 

• if you are not a fan of vomit you’re not gonna enjoy richie tozier. literally any time something bad happens hes just like ah shit here we go again *vomits* and honestly? that made me laugh. like hes just like oh shit something is happening let.. let me just.. no no its fine guys ill catch up.. EHBWFIJHDFSIJ no okay but bill hader stole the fucking show. his acting was phenomenal and,, again,, i’ll add more onto that later. 

• richie scares the shit out of dean. because he thinks hes pennywise. but can you blame him? the kid just. stared at him all creepy and shit. but its so funny. the losers make fun of him bc he doesnt know his own lines from his acts and richies just like “I dont write my own material” and eddies just like “I KNEW IT! I FUCKING KNEW IT” dead. goodbye.

• Young losers were still my favorite part honestly. Eddie kept bouncing that stupid ball in stan’s face in the clubhouse and i was waiting for him to get punched in the face tbh. That didn’t even seem like eddie, that was Jack’s energy bursting through the seams lmfao

• young eddie runs into a fucking box and shrieks and if that isn’t me idk ewhdfiajksjdoi 

• THE FUCKING. HAMMOCK. SCENE. okay listen to me. thats gay. hammocks are now gay. gays only. gay interacts only. the bickering between reddie had me in TEARS. eddie kept kicking at his face and just?? casually??? lays on him when richie wont move?? 

• stan’s fucking shower cap ehfdiujasdiosa and then richie being like “nobodys afraid of spiders stanley okay” and eddie slowly removes his because he cares what richie thinks more than spiders ok

• a flashback from after they defeated IT in the first move with reddie “eddie youve been gone for 24 hours your face is most likely on a milk carton by now” “shut up richie” 

• yong Richie has me weak af this whole movie, like always. just getting on Eddie’s case. HE PINES SO HARD OH Y GOD Like wow my sweet boy is so fucking in love ouch. which?? BRINGS ME TO MY NEXT POINT??

• THE ARCADE SCENE?? he checks out the kid standing next to him and tries to get him to hang out more and then the other kid tells him to stop being weird because he’s not gay, too, and then uses the F slur. richie was just so hurt. paul bunyun scene happens after that and hes just like “I just shit my pants” and i cried. 

• pennywise screaming “lets play truth or dare, you wouldnt pick truth! you dont want them to know your secret” gave off the same energy as eddie’s leper blowjob scene from the book. same energy. do with that as you will. 

• they had some flashbacks that included pennywise and im not sure if this was before or after they had defeated IT in the first movie but i interpreted it as after and if thats the case... hes supposed to be dead. but now thinking back on it, it was probably just more scenes before they put pennywise to rest for 27 years. 

• young richie went to the kissing bridge after that and we ALL KNOW WHAT HAPPENED THERE. fucking.. r + e :((( although we don’t see him carving the E. but reddie is canon so suck toes antis

• stephen king pretty much being like “I know u and ur endings really do suck” to bill when he comes to buy his bike was so fucking funny. it almost felt like a self insert lmfao. ALSO HIM MAKING BILL PAY 300 BUCKS FOR THE BIKE BC HE KNEW HE COULD AFFORD IT? iconic. 

• richie and eddie opening the door to the dog had me laughing. pennywise was just mocking them at that point. they’d be such good dog dads and now im sad

• i was really confused because they added part of stan’s bar mitzvah?? like it wasn’t even the same from the first movie. like they should’ve just put the deleted scene in from ch. 1 and then added that part. thats one of my very few complaints. im slowly hiding them in here. 

• henry bowers was kinda irrelevant in this honestly but thank you eddie for stabbing him and richie for killing him for trying to kill mike yall heroes 

• BEVS BLOOD SCENE ?? CORRESPONDING WITH BENS BURIED ALIVE SCENE? poetic cinema. 10/10

• the big fight really disappointed me in all honesty. but i think thats because andy said he cut so much from there. i expect it to be better with the director’s cut

• eddie saving richie and then immediately being stabbed by pennywise’s claw? IM DEPRESSED.

• “Rich! rich, i did it! i think i killed him!” Our boy was so happy with himself :( 

• eddie’s last words WERE NOT “i fucked your mom”. he was talking to richie and you can hear them talking while the rest are preparing to end pennywise. so im hoping we get that as a deleted scene. 

• richie goes back to help finish pennywise but when he goes to check on eddie.. he’s dead. ://// and bev is like “richie, come on, honey.. im sorry” and richie does not want to believe him. he grabs and hugs eddie so tight i swear i could feel that hug from the audience. 

• another thing im disappointed in and am sliding in is some of the animations? Like. fucking weird. but okay. luckily i didn’t care too much.  

• THE SOB that richie lets out when he holds eddie really hurt my fucking soul jesus christ just kill me

• the losers try cheering him up after and like. thats their friend too but you can just totally tell he’s crying in a different type of grief. THAT WAS HIS FIRST FUCKING LOVE. 

• they all remember after and thats really important to me okay

• stan writes letters and its spoken outloud while the other losers get little montages of what theyre doing with their life after the battle. Richie goes back to the kissing bridge and recarves- YES RECARVES AND YOU CAN CLEARLY SEE THE E BEFORE HE DOES- he recarves the E and while doing it, stan’s voice says “be proud of who you are” and im fucking cry ibg okay

• in the end, i give this movie a 7/10 rating. although some of the animations were weird and some of the flashbacks had pennywise in it (like hes supposed to be currently dead but ok... maybe nightmares??) the actors were PHENOMENAL and the chemistry between older richie and older eddie made me so happy. my ship is canon. but im still sad about stan and eddies death. 

• ignoring canon in 3.. 2.. 1.. now 

#it chapter 2 #it chapter two spoilers #IT CHAPTER TWO #it chapter 2 spoilers #IT SPOILERS #reddie #richie tozier #eddie kaspbrak #bill denbrough #mike hanlon #beverly marsh #ben hanscom #stanley uris

[absolutelythelargestbeefiesthog]

THIS IS THE LAST CHAPTER OF SKEKVAS EPIC ADVENTURE!!!

DONT CRY ALL GOOD THINGS END EXCEPT FOR ME I AM IMMORTAL

SkekVas had found the big arathim nest because he was resally smart.

He came out and into it and was looking around,

“Wow this is one big arathims nest,” and it was.

But where were the arathim?

“I dont know where the arathim are” said skekong because he was not as smart as skekvar and he could only notice things that werent there and not things that were there like the big size of the nest

“These arathim are planning to really destroy us this time” skekong said and skekvas rolled his eyes

“Good luck to them!” skekloch, “because were going to kick their butts!”

“Yes we are!” said skekvas, because i am here and i am leading you! So stop being so cowardly skekong!”

“I’m not being cowardly,” said cowardly skekong, “I am just saying thast we have an army of gelfling slaves for a reason why did we not bring them? This shows a lack of foresight.”

“I did say there were a lot fo arathim” said skekle, “Diod skeksin not say there were a lot fo arathim?”

“Yes he said it was big.” Skekvas as getting annoyed. It was stupdi that they should slow down the narrative flow by having a big conversation right as the action should be starting.,

“Skeksin probably pretended there were less to the emperor to send us down here to be killed!” said skekong and for once he was saying something smart.

Skekvas nodded his head and gave a big grunt to show he agreed,

“Yes, we will smash skeksin head in when we get back and we will pull his dress over his head and throw him in the moat”

“Good one!” said Skekloch, “I cant wait!”

They all laughed and then skekvas said,

“Biut not you skekle, dirty tramp.” and then skekle was sad because he was a trampy exile.

Just then the arathim arrived which was good because everyone was getting bored.

The arathim formed a big face and said,

“You dare come into our big nest? Your time has come! Ruination befall you! You have stolen our homes and our culture and now we will steal your lives and our planet back!”

Skekvas said,

“Die!” which was a good succinct war cry

The arathim attacked bu the skeksis were too strong and by skeksis i mean skekvas. The others were ok biut mostly they were cannon fodder and distraction. All in all skekvas was the most important one and if he hadnt have been there things would have gone wrong instead of right like he made it when he dragged it all out of the fire. He was pretty great. And also his hair flew like a lustrous mane when he did a might jump. When he did a mighty jump he swang his sword through the sair and it made a tching! Sound and it shined bright.

“Oh no!” sai dthe arathim is that the tri glaive again?!”

And Skekvas said,

“I dont think so!” and he did a big stab! He stabbed forward! He stabbed backwards! He stabbed left! He stabbed right! He stabbed all the bits in between and did several swings and circles and spun around and also he had a blade on his tail and two shields which he used with his second arms. His second arms were kind of small but its not about size its about how you use them.

Skekvas had thought hte sword was just cool but actually it kind of was liek the triglaive. The nasty piece of poo skekgla had run away with the original triglaive but skekrek had made this second one and skekvas used it with deadly skill to stab. He killed all the arathim basically on his oown and in the end he was bathed in blood and juices and smelling all musky and sweaty in a sexy way.

Also his hair was still perfect.

He brushed it out of his face and said,

“Phew! I have done so much killing and now i am feeling so sexy. And also i want a snack.”

“That was so much fun” said skekloch, “I love killing and i love spending time with my friends when we murder.”

“Me too said skekvas”

“Yeah” said skekong but skekvas rolle dhis eyes because skekong wasnt his friend and so he wasnt included in the sentiment.

Skekle said,

“You’ll tell the emperor about me telling skeksin and about how helpful iw as in this fight?”

“Were you?” said skekvas and they all laughed and skekvas punched skekle and skekle hid a big cry.

They were all tired but they collvected up some trophies and climbed back up the big hole to go home.

When they got home they walked into the throne room in slow motion.  The emperor did a radiant smile

“Well done my general” he said#

Skekvas loved it when he said ‘my general’ and skekvas did a big bow.

The emperor did a big sniff, he could smell skekvas musky sexy murder smell

Skekvas and the other presented their war trophies and the emperor smile grew even bigger and skekvas knew he had done a really good job then he noticed skeksin skulking beside the throne looking like a hunched little crawly man and he grew inflamed with rage

“Skeksin tried to kill us!2 skekvas said, “he didnt say how big the arathim nest really was! We should have had back up!”

“Oh,” said the emperor, “did you not succeed?”

Yes said skekvas

“All by yourself?”

“Yes, said skekvas

“Then why did you need back up? Were you scared? Said the emperor

Skekvas felt his manhood shrink. He felt totally humiliated and tricked. No doubt skekong had said that stupid thing earlier to put the thought into skekvas head because he was working with skeksin to undermine skekvas because they wer eboth evil. Skekvas felt so small that all the fun of killing left him. His day was ruined. The emperor laughed at him and then arranged for a big feast.

At the big feast everyone had fun except skekvas. They all through a big party and had a blast and had a lot to drink. Skekvas drank a lot too but that was only so he could hide the fact that he was not smiling by holding his cup in front of his face. He had really thoughthat this time he would make his big impression but skeksin schemes had undermines him again and ruined everything.

Why does this always happen to me? Skekvas thought

I am so perfect, handsome, smatt, strong, and sexy? Maybe that is my pronblem?

But he couldnt figure out how it could be.

After the dinner skekvas went for a wlk. He couldnt sleep and he just felt bad and goning to a walk and finding animals to kill sometimes made him feel better and if not he would punch a tree until he was too tired and then go to bed. He walked for a long time and stood in the shade of a big tree and looked at the big castle with all the light son in the windows. It eaz beautiful and it was his home. But he also felt sadness there feeling like he couldnt do enough as he wanted to do.

Why am i destined to be incomplete? He thought, thinking a deep thought,.

He often thought deep thoughts.

“I wish that i could just kill skeksin but i am a hero and a hero abides by the rules and it would make the emperer mad and he would banish me. I dont evr want to be away from his side but benign with him feels like ia m so close but not close enough.”

“If only he could see that i am perfect for him he would let me sit with him a the dinner table and maybe hold his hand.”

Skekvas gave a big sigh. In the shadow of the big tree he held his own hand and pretended it wasnt his. This is something heroes do a lot because part of being a hero is being selfless and able to withstand great personal torment like an aching heart and a heldless hand.

After a while skekvas stood up. He knew he was realy strong not just in killoing and in his large powerful muscular body but in his mind and will and heart too. Skekvas knew that love was the only thing you didnt share and so was heartache. His heartache was his burden for being a hero and also being the strongest. And the best.

“The emperor will see that i am amazing and he will want to hold my hand and touch my beautiful body and run his fingers from my flowing mane of hair.”

He said this outloud because it was his vision and he wanted the world to hear it and know it was going to be true. Heroes have to have a vision thety fight for. This was skekvas vision the vision fo the glorious beautiful radiant emperor shining and sparkling like the moons. Skekvas went back to the castle. He had an important mission.

His important missionw as he gathered all of his friends and even skekong who had insisted, under pressure, that he had genuinely thought skeksin was a liar. The friends all gathered together and using the power of friendship they lifted skeksin up in the air while he was screaming and they threw him over the balcony and into the moat. The emperor was watching snd he did a big laugh and smiled at skekvas. Skekvas knew this was a sign. Skekvas had thought his hardest trial would be to kil the big arathim but that had been easy because skekvas was so strong and powerful and a good fighter. No. his greatest trial was withstanding the evil trickery and lies of skeksin that keopt stopping the emperor from falling in love with skekvas. The emperor giving a smile was a clear sign that he would definitely fall in love with skekvas soon. This was an epic end to skekvas epic story. Maybe there will be a sequel where they kiss i dont know. That would be cool i think. I think that would be really good if they kissed.

This is the end of the story. I know maybe you thought it would be more triumphant but actually this is a story for adults and you realise when you are wise like me that sometimes life isnt all big victories. Life is very complociated and you can have good battle and lost wars and bad battles and won wars. The trick is to keep fighting. Except when it is better to stop fighting. But most of the time to win a war you haver to do some kind of fiughting. Just be good at fighting is my advice. I know you have enjoyed this story and you are probably wishing it was more but like all the best stories it is only three parts because i ran out of things to say towards the end. Feel free to tell me how my writing has changed your life for the better.

You’re welcome

Love,

SkekVar

#skekVar #skekvar the general

[feua]

Spill the tea pls

I legally cant say her actual name so we'll call her Jane doe. Tw for self harm/suicide, death, manipulation, rape, stalking and transphobia

In middle school she would self harm and then show it off to people (not like people would see like she would be like look I cut myself feel bad for me)

She always cuts into peoples business. Ex; I was talking to my friend and joking around and she inserted herself into the convo and got mad when she was ignored.

She said she wanted Buttigeg to win the presidency because he was gay. She didnt know any of his policies or anything she only cared about him being gay

She wants to be a heart surgeon and my favorite quote of hers is: "Is the heart an organ or a muscle?"

Part of a convo- Jane: So why is your name [deadname] your school email? / Friend: The school cant change it. / Jane: hmmm sure

My blind friend was showing me and our other friend his new cane and how it worked. Jane walked over, said, "Oh let me see!". She took it from him and started waving it around and playing with it

She said my friends deadname to his face and asked if it was his "real name" (btw as soon as that happened I went the fuck off on her cause my friend doesnt like to get into fights)

To the same friend, she asked him personal questions that arent her business like, are your parents married, is your dad black, are you hispanic, etc.

She likes to sing out loud especially when we're trying to finish assignments. Shes not good.

^ once she was singing a beetlejuice song outloud and she got mad when several people told her to shut up

Jane: *trying to show off that she likes Hamilton* / friend: oh its George Washington the musical / Jane: NO ITS NOT JUST BECAUSE HES IN IT DOESNT MEAN ITS ABOUT HIM ITS ABOUT ALEXANDER HAMILTON

She didnt know what sperm looked like??? We were in honors bio and child development,,,

Once she literally just carried around a bell pepper all day, sticker and all. This isnt tea it was just weird

Boy: *is picking up markers that spilled* /Jane: *picking them up* I KNOW MY COLORS

This bullshit during an assignment jesus christ - marker boy: *looks at her for half a second* / Jane: sorry did I scare you? I know I'm crazy. / me: shut up / jane: I wasn't talking to you. / me: stop, you're not quirky, I'm just trying to do my work / jane: okay whatever *whispers* I'm gonna kill you

She uses her brothers death to get sympathy. Ex; she will bring it up if shes losing an argument as if it makes any difference. Or she'll just say it for no reason other than attention. I'm sorry for her hut it's the only thing she talks about (the death was like 2-3 years ago)

Shes in theater and gets mad when shes not a lead or supporting role. (Also shes not a great actress so ://)

And she annoys people about going to the plays. She never shuts up about it

She talks about the subject a teacher is teaching WHILE the teacher is talking. Ex; my teacher was telling us about other science classes and she started talking about anatomy and physiology and as she was explaining, Jane said, "yeah omg join anatomy and physiology it's so fun it's a good class"

I'm like 90% sure she fetishizes gay men and is friends with a r*pist at the school

Shes in a ton of clubs (like gsa and nhs) and still has this kind of behavior

She uses the fact that shes depressed to try to make people feel bad for her and be her friend

She stalked someone once

Quote: "I'm special. *pause* Special Ed" (she has no mental disabilities)

#ask #anon #ill add things if i remember anything else #PLEASE ask me to tag anything else if you need it #suicide tw #tw suicide mention #tw suicide #suicide mention tw #self harm tw #tw self harm #tw rape mention #rape mention #tw rape #rape tw #tw transphobia #transphobia tw #tw manipulation #manipulation tw #tw death #tw death mention #death tw #death mention tw #death mention #tw stalking #stalking tw

[funeralllhome]

When I posted about my trip to Weis, i got some really interesting questions and some really rude questions and had alot of nice conversations about randy with other people, which was great, I really wasn't expecting any kind of response at all.

One of the questions I got the most was "why? Why do you go there?"

And I dont see this as a nasty question or an opportunity to be rude. I haven't individually answered any of them because I was trying to come up with a blanket response but it was a little harder than I thought it would be, but I've thought alot about it recently and I've finally got the words I want to use together, so I'm going to try my best not to sound silly.

I would be lying if I said I was interested in the shooting or with randy as soon as it happened. The shooting actually took place on my 23rd birthday. I live in a part Maryland that borders Pennsylvania, and puts me about 4 hours from tunkhannock where the shooting happened. I read about it very briefly when it happened and that was that, it wasn't really high on my radar at the time. I've been interested in true crime since I was about 14, there really wasn't a platform to share that interest on at that time. My earlier tumblr days had a big emphasis on jeffrey dahmer because he was what I was most interested in. I had become very much obsessed with him and being on this website gave me the freedom to post about him and talk to other people about him which was something I didn't have before. I've had several other hyperfixations of the same kind since I've been on here (Columbine, dylann roof etc.)

But then I found randy.

When I found randy, I wasnt really sure what he had even done, I knew he had been an active shooter and had committed suicide but that was about it. When I got further into him and watched his youtube videos, read his posts, things like that, I was absolutely invested in it, in him. I'm not really sure what it is about him that draws me to him, I'm still trying to figure it out.

When I found out that the Weis was only 4 hours from my home, I was able to convince my brother to take the trip with me there for the first time in January 2019. It was a long, cold trip, in the middle of January. We had to drive up a mountain to get there (literally). We ended up getting to the store around 6 in the afternoon, after it was already dark.

That night when we arrived back home, I had the time to really reflect on where we went.

He died there. The last place he ever set foot in alive was that fucking grocery store. It must have been one of the quietest, loneliest moments of his entire life when he killed himself. His family was at home, asleep in bed, while he was killing himself only a few minutes away. He was someone's something. He existed.

I humanize randy stair. I dont see him as a monster because I choose not to. I see his actions as awful but I dont see him as awful. I dont believe he was a collection of his actions.

Going to that grocery store is important to me. When I say it outloud, it sounds..stupid. I dont ever tell anyone except my family and one or two of my close friends when I go because I dont want to have to explain why I am going there. I have a fear that an explanation would also create the misconception that I'm going there for something disgusting or for shock value gore or something like that. That couldn't be further from the truth.

Seeing that store and walking it gives me a sense of realness I couldn't get from anywhere else, it makes him tangible. I'm never emotional when I am there because I feel like it wouldn't be appropriate. I never go alone, I've been 3 times and my brother accompanies me. We have fun on the trip, we laugh, we listen to music, we stop at restaurants and Walmarts and we have a fun time. But, we both know where we are going. We know things will be different when we get there. It's a quiet experience inside. We dont laugh and carry on in the store. He understands why I go there and he has never questioned me about it.

The second time I went, I cried when I got home. I cried for a long time. I wasnt really sure why, I just was. It was hard, harder than it had been the time before that. I didn't cry the last time I was there and I probably wont anymore when I return.

I have a connection to randy stair that I'm not sure can really be explained. I dont know how to explain it. Going to that store and seeing it, touching it, makes me feel better. It makes me feel less alone. Obviously, I know he isnt there, hes dead.

I've put off writing this post for several reasons, one of them is that I dont want anyone to think im being offensive or turning the death of the people who worked there or Randy's death into an attraction of sorts. I dont see it as anything like that at all. I understand the difference between interested or morbid obsession and that is not what I am doing. The other reason is that I just wasn't sure how to explain it. The last time I went, my mother asked me what makes me go there and the response I gave her was that it makes me feel better, it reminds me that he was real. He was there.

And That's why I do it. It makes him real. It makes him important.

Even though most people dont even know who he was or what he did, he was real. It makes him real to me.

I know that this was rather long and drawn out and if you took the time to read it, I really appreciate it and I hope it can give anyone who asked me why I go there the answer they looked for. I know this kind of conversation isnt really relative to what i mostly post and I hope I didn't offend or upset anyone who finds these kinds of things hard to talk about.

I know randy stair isnt really a well known person of interest in the true crime community so I'm sure most people see my posts and dont even know who I'm talking about lmao but, I hope this could offer some clarity. I'm always always always open to talking about randy or my trips to Weis, so please, as always, feel free to message me if you want to talk!

#personal #randy stair #andrew blaze #pioneers productions #mine

[thiswhatgodfeelslike]

a lot of kids right after highschool or even during highschool will start to experiment on drugs which is cool yeah okay, but you also never know how they will affect you until after you do them!! so its important to do research it really is. i tried psychedelics on impulse with my friends after working all night. so i come home around midnight, and me and 3 other people did it. I felt it coming an hour later. At first it was such a good experience. we were all laughing so hard we were crying. my friend ethan took his first about 30 min before us. He felt ot coming before us. As it was coming he kind of freaked out and started having a bad trip off the bat. I remember he was telling us, dont do this, throw up right now, you dont wanna feel like this, so that kind of freaked everyone one out. His brother was addicted to airduster and died in a car crash must i add. & so he lived through that and was trippin thinking he was being airlifted and literally gonna die. He called his mom but our trip setter said it was a buttdail and hung up LOL. Anyway after a couple hours he came out of that bad time and 'woke up' like nothing happened. Still trippin, he started talking about time and how everything is a loop and that its not real. I started to laugh, and then i was hysterically crying. My friend Bryce who wasnt on anything tried to help me. I asked if he would go upstairs with me because downstairs wasnt a good setting for me at that time. Upstairs, it was dark. He was trying to comfort me the best he could. I started seeing things. I already was seeing things and patterns. But i started seeing bad things. Bugs, all over the walls. Things crawling all over me. I was terrified. I finally ran out of the room and almost fell down the stairs on my way out because i was scared. I walked outside for a bit. It was beautiful and i felt at peace again. Its about 5am now and everyone was trying to sleep. Me and zack went upstairs to sleep in bryces bed. He fell asleep almost instantly, as did everyone else downstairs... no matter how hard i tried to sleep i couldnt. I closed my eyes and my momd took over so i tried to stay up for that reason. I was laying there looking at everything in the room, a stuffed plush turtle was on the bed and it started to swom around the room. I remember asking fairly loudly , can anyone here me.. is anyone awake... no answers. I was laying there in bed telling myself outloud, 'i am never doing this again. Hope- dont do this again. You know what you feel like right now and you dont want this. Please dont do this again'. Bryce had a bathroom in his bedroom so i took a journey there. And thats when i just looked at myself and my face was so disoriented. It was so weird. I dont know why i did, maybe i thought i would be sobered up if i seen some sort of 'reality'. I was there forever it seemed like. Just looking at myself and i didnt like what i saw. 8am rolls around and everyone wakes up. Their trip is over. I am still awake, 24ish hours at this point. Im still not here. I still see things. Every word i attempted to say just didnt sound right to me. I didnt feel like myself. I do believe i killed myself or whoever i was on the inside after that. We walk downstairs and ethan takes me & zack with him to get food. Walking outside, just looking around at what we think is reality. I didnt see it. There was no reality for me. We get im his truck and start driving. The world is so crazy and fake. Thats all i remember thinking. We got pulled over because i didnt have a seatbelt on. Talking to the cop was the biggest challenge i have faced i swear to god. I felt like he knew i wasnt really there. Like he knew i knew i am retarded and that reality isnt real. Anyway. I never paid that ticket.

1 year later

me and zack move out to a 1 bedroom apartment. Bryce, dion, and tim came over. They all wanted to do shrooms. Ofcourse i said no at first because i remember what i told myself out loud. And i knew i didnt want to expierence that again. I kept getting, cmon shrooms are way different, they wont be as strong. So i said ok. We took the shrooms and mixed them up with lemon juice and took a shot. I only did 3 grams. We drive around immediately after and they start to hit as we're driving. I was telling myself in my head, its okay. Its okay. Its okay. This is gonna be a good trip. We go to a park and walk around. Everything was so vivid and bright and so fucking beautiful. We're there for an hour or two. We smoke 2 blunts. It was fun. I liked it at the park. We go home early. A tiny one bedroom apartment with 5 people in it. As im walking up the apartment stairs i started to notice things that were entering my mind. It wasnt good. Call it an anxiety attack. But tripping. After sitting on the couch as long as i could i go to the bed and lay down. I get scared. So terrifed. Why am i thinking what im thinking. I try to act normal. I lay in bed alone and do what i would usually do. Then i asked myself what the FUCK would i usually do. I yelled for zack. He came. I started talking about so much but mainly what i was exactly thinking at that moment. I was saying everything that was entering my mind idk why but i was. " i want to kill myself " and that was fucking it. "Can you please shoot me i cant take this. This is too much i dont want to live here anymore i cant do this" maybe i was thinking that because i lied to myseld and i did it again. I did psychedelics again. After i begged myself to never do it. I threw up. After a couple hours in the bathroom trying to think of how i can possibly shoot my brains out because i couldnt take it. It was mental torture. I was already killing myself by doing the shrooms and i think i knew it deep down. anyway after some hours I layed down at 8pm and falling alseep was the hardest thing ever.. but i managed. I woke up the next day and let me tell you guys. I will never be the same. Its like, multiple illnesses seeped out from the depths and theyre with me every goddamn day. I feel the same urges and tendencies as i did when i freaked out. A simple stomach ache will trigger it. Sometimes weed will trigger it. Just dont fucking do psychedelics if you dont know anything about them, about yourself, or about family history of mental illnesses. I discovered too much for my own good and im stuck like this forever.

#lsd trip #my lsd trip #shrooms #drugs #mental ill health #mental breakdown #mental health #mental instability #therapy

[bytemycupcakes]

Breakup

A couple bits of Mavrik dealing with his and Charlie’s breakup, leading to some subtle fatherly (and Lucifer maybe?) bonding.

Words: 1574

(Thanks again to@/voneldrich for letting me use their name for the Von Eldrich father! Saved me so much pain TTvTT)

~~

Mavrik takes a bit longer getting home than he usually does. It’s no surprise for him of course- He doesn’t want to see anyone. He can’t believe what he just did. How could he ever- He was raised better. He’s supposed to be better than that. That- Those things he did… That’s Helsa’s thing, she’s the one who attacks anyone and everyone. Not him. He thought so anyway, maybe things are changing, what’s next? Helsa sharing her feelings?

He’s barely holding back his tears, and can barely see through the ones managing to escape. He can feel blood leaking across his knuckles- Did he really punch those kids that hard? He’s not sure, he barely remembers it depite it happening just an hour ago. 

Mavrik stumbles up the stairs and fumbles with opening the front door. As the door opens he’s met with his father- Right, he and Lucifer had a meeting tonight. Mavrik stares like a deer in headlights as Styx looks him over. Of course it’s pretty hard to miss how terrible Mavrik looks right now, so his father asks the dreaded question, “Mavrik- Son are you alright..?”

Mavrik tries to hold himself together, he’s almost an adult, he shouldn’t be breaking down at the slightest bit of concern. But god damn he just lost the source of his happiness- He sniffles and weakly shakes his head as he plants himself against his father’s shoulder, letting the tears finally fall. Styx sighs and quietly puts his arms around Mavrik, “It’s alright… Come- let’s sit down-”

Styx leads Mavrik to the couch and they sit. He wants to ask Mavrik why he’s so upset, but ultimately decides to wait until Mavrik calms down. They sit in silence for a bit, when he seems to remember something- He pulls out his phone and dials. Mavrik can hear the phone ring, so he tries to quiet himself.

“Ah- I was just about to call you-” Lucifer’s voice sounds through the phone speaker.

“Yes hello Lucifer- I… Think we may need to cancel our plans… Mavrik’s um-” Styx looks down at Mavrik, patting his head.

“Yyeeeesss… Charlotte’s quite-” Theres a loud crash through the speaker, “Angry… We’ll need to reschedule…”

“Indeed…” He hums and hangs up, setting the phone down.

“I-I’m sorry-” Mavrik mumbles between his sobs.

“I take it you and Charlotte must’ve broken up today..?”

Mavrik nods. His father tightens his hold on him, “Those can be tough, but you’ll be alright… In time.”

Mavrik shrugs like he doesn’t believe him, “I-” He sniffles, “I don’t think so, dad-” He wipes his tears the best he can, “I… It’s all my fault- Im so- stupid-”

Styx frowns, “Oh come now, Mavrik- Don’t talk about yourself like that… Your first relationship going sour is a common occurance, no need to beat yourself up about it.”

“But I-!” Mavrik cuts himself off- He doesn’t want to say it outloud, then it’ll be real- He huffs and gets up, “I’m- I’m gonna call it an early night… Thanks for- All of that, dad-”

He smiles, “You know I’ll always be here for you, Mavrik. Sleep well, son”

–

Mavrik is laying in bed, he doubts he got any sleep- He isn’t sure when he last slept honestly… Even though he hasn’t left his room in a week or so. Every time he tries he remembers what happened- He swears he can still… Feel her in his hand- Picture how angry she was with him- Why won’t the images leave his head? Why can’t he just forget it! Wouldn’t he be better off that way?

He pulls his pillow closer to his chest and huffs when he hears footsteps outside of his room. Mavrik isn’t really sure what time it is- But he’s sure that nobody should actually be home.

The footsteps stop, and there’s a small sigh, “How’s he doing?” Oh- It’s Lucifer.

“Better I’d assume… He stopped crying at least- He should still be sleeping if you’d like to check on him.” And his father- Mavrik wonders why they’re here- Rather than the Mange’s home where they usually work.

Mavrik quietly huffs, turning his head to the door in case Lucifer decides to come in.

“No, no.. I’ll let the boy be…”

The footsteps begin again, heading toward his father’s office. The voices pregressively get quieter.

“Hows Charlotte been?”

“Finally stopped tearing up her room-” Lucifer sighs, “Still no idea on what happened?”

“No- He won’t tell us… Just says it’s his fault-”

“Charlotte won’t say anything about it either- Did we mess up somewhere, Styx? To make them not trust us with this…?”

Their voices are to faded for Mavrik to hear his father’s responce- But he’ll conceide… Lucifer’s question makes him feel bad. Why hasn’t he told his parent’s what he did? They’re his parents- They’ll help him through this, wouldn’t they? But there’s another question on Mavrik’s mind, “… W̨̨͘͢͏h̵̛͘̕y͢ ̡d͏oes Lucifer even care how I’m doing…?”

His face scrunches up at how pathetic he sounds. He’s almost forgotten that he hasn’t talked in a few days. He hums into his pillow, he should probably get up- Doesn’t need his legs to atrophy… He will later.

–

A few hours pass- Long enough that Mavrik hopes he’s finally the only one home. He rolls off his bed- Litterally, he rolls off the mattress and thuds against the floor, “O͘w̶̨҉”

He clears his throat then groans as he forces himself to sit up. He stares at the floor for a bit, “C’mon Mav- You can get up, damnit. Can’t stay in here forever.” He slaps a hand on his bed, managing to push himself to his feet, “Life goes on… You gotta go with it-”

Mavrik has decided he’s going to fake it ‘til he makes it, so he does his best to push down his bad feelings and get dressed. He isn’t going anywhere, but looking like a presentable person usually helps one get out of depressive funks. He runs his hands through his- honestly disgusting- hair to attempt to tame it and glances at the sunlight peeking through his curtains, “I haven’t been outside in awhile, huh?” He squints at his now greasy feeling hands for a moment then back to the curtain, “It looks nice out- A walk out back wouldn’t kill me.”

The day is indeed nice, Mavrik strolls through the family garden with a subtle smile. He used to do this quite often when he was younger, he doesn’t remember why he ever stopped. The garden’s always been a nice quiet place to just think, and that’s exactly what Mavrik needs to do. He stops by one of the flowering bushes and cups one of the flowers. A petal has clearly been eaten a bit, but the flower appears to be fine, just a small scar in it’s life, it can move on and keep living.

Some tears start to bead up when Mavrik hears some distant speaking- Damn, He isn’t the only one home apparently. He figures he should show- whoever it is- that he’s finally “functioning” again, so he goes toward the voices source. He’ll admit, he isn’t too surprised when it turns out to be his father and Lucifer, though he thought they would’ve gone back to work by now.

“I just can’t figure out why Charlotte won’t be honest with me- She know’s I want to help- To see her happy-”

Mavrik grumbles to himself as he hears Lucifer- Of course they’re talking about Charlie, he and her have been the talk of their families since they broke up. He walks up beside the two parents, oh great he’s doing it, “I… May have an idea-” Mavrik leans forward as he pokes into their conversation.

They both look to him, surprised for a moment then they both smile.

“Mavrik my boy! It’s lovely to see you!” Lucifer sounds far to happy for Mavrik to really believe him.

Though he bows slightly anyway- it’s only polite, “Likewise, sir- I apologise that you must see me like this-” Sure he’s dressed, but he still looks awful.

Styx chuckles, waving a hand, “Nonsense, Mavrik. Lucifer’s seen you in diapers, seeing you distraught is no different.”

“… I suppose-” Mavrik shrugs, his father is right, sure, though he still doesn’t feel like he looks presentable.

Styx stands and goes to Mavrik, placing a hand on his shoulder, “It’s nice to finally see you out of bed, son… I’ve been getting worried”

“I’ll- Be fine, dad…” Mavrik shrugs once again, “Promise-” He tries to ignore how much that feels like a lie, he’s worried his family enough.

Lucifer gets up aswell, “Well- You’re not the only one struggling here, Charlotte’s taking it hard aswell. Though it isnt-” Lucifer cuts himself off for a moment, “Er- As… Physically obvious as your struggles-”

Styx rolls his eyes and sighs while pushing Lucifer away, “He’s- right but- Ignore him, Mavrik, you know Lucifer has no filter.”

“Yeah I’m startin’ to think you don’t either, dad-” Mavrik laughs slightly, “I’m- Gonna go take a shower- Before I start looking like one of those… Gaming losers- Who don’t know what deodorant is-” He awkwardly finger-guns at Styx and Lucifer as he backs away.

As Mavrik heads back to the house, the sound of Styx slapping Lucifer on the back of the head echoes through the garden- Mavrik snorts, but tries to hold in his laughter, pretending he couldn’t hear it.

#Hazbin hotel #Hazbin Lucifer #Hazbin Von Eldrich #MavAu #Baizli's writings! :0)

[logina-logic-sanders]

Moxiety angst

This is set after accepting anxiety and Virgil is thinking about ducking out again for good this time.

Virgil's P.O.V.

I'm in my room replaying the events that happened today.  Thomas had snapped at me. I dont even know what I did wrong I was just including my opinion like always then he just snapped. The worst part was no one tried to stop him not even Patton. So as soon as he was done yelling I sank out and into my room and I've been here ever since. I havent even left to eat. Maybe I'm not needed maybe I should duck out again. I thought they had accepted me I guess it was all an act just so I would come back because they couldnt stand the way Thomas was acting but I dont care anymore.

3rd P.O.V

Virgil wrote a note to the others and left it on his bed. It was around 10 at night so everyone should be asleep. He decided to let Thomas have a good nights rest because why try when he doesnt want him around right. He then walked into his bathroom and ran himself a bath and grabs a razor. Once the water is ran he gets undressed and gets in and begins to make deep cuts on his arms and then he held his breath and went under the water and after so long he allowed his mouth to open letting water into his lungs. His breathing came to a stop as well as his heart beat and his hand fell and the razor dropped to the floor.

The next morning

It was around 12 in the afternoon and no one had seen Virgil so they all decided to go check on him. Patton knocked on the door and when he got no response he picked the lock and opened the door but didnt see Virgil. Roman was the first to see the note and pick it up unfolding it and began to read out loud.

Roman's P.O.V.

I began to read the note that I found outloud so the others could hear.

"Dear Family,

I'm sorry that I wasnt good enough for you so I decided to subtract myself from the equation for good. So I have something to say to all of you...

Roman, to be honest I saw you as an older brother rather than an enemy....but I guess to you I would always be the enemy....all the mean stuff I said to you I never meant any of it I was just teasing.......

Logan, unlike Roman I saw you as more of a teacher figure and I always thought about everything you said....and even if I'd never admit I actually enjoyed your company and loved debating with you.

I know he might not be with you guys at the moment but if you could give him this part of the letter it would be appreciated but Deceit, you were like my older brother that is always trying to protect me and I cant say that we didnt have our rough patches but i still love you like a brother and please help keep everyone sane as well as Thomas.

Thomas, dont beat yourself up about this because i always knew that i was never wanted. But I hope you can be happy now that I'm gone stay safe and listen to the others and let Deceit help trust me he isnt all just lies he can be honest when he wants to be.

And last but not least

Patton, to be honest I cried when writing this part of the letter because you did so much for me and I thank you for that but I know when I'm not wanted and I could tell that you were starting to give up on stopping the others and I dont blame you but God I cant believe I'm doing this but I'm sorry you had to find out this was but Patton I love you as more than a friend but i was too anxious to tell you i knew that you would never like me in the same way but I will always be your Dark Strange Son I love you..... Love, Anxiety Virgil Sanders"

Tears roll down my face as I finished reading the note out loud and I saw Patton fall to his knees holding his heart and screaming.

Patton's P.O.V.

I fall to my knees and start to cry and scream. "HE LOVED ME BACK AND NOW HE LEFT ME!" I run to the open bathroom door and see Virgil in the tub and blood dripping from his wrist and run over to him pulling him out of the tub and hugging him while crying. I just lost the love of my life and my only support beam. I wish I had told him I loved him sooner maybe he would still be here. I cried harder and clinged to Virgil's dead body.

Few months later

I havent been as happy since Virgil died I dont even try to hide my pain and it's starting to affect Thomas and everyone is yelling at me but hey I dont care I dont even flinch. And that shocks them all I just smile and say "Hey Virgil" and they look at me like they had just seen a ghost and I smile and let my glamour fall and let everyone see how heartbroken I truly was because down my chest was a huge crack and It grew bigger until i faded away. I'm with Virgil now and he greeted me with a kiss but I look down and see the others a wreck. But I knew that they would gain two knew people soon so I just smiled and said "let's go home Virgil" he nods and we disappear forever.

Btw these are from my wattpad stories so I'm not copying anyone else's work.

#angst #patton angst #sanders sides angst #virgil angst #moxiety angst

[hypmicscenarios]

Chance Meeting (2)

A/N broke it up into three parts but you can read full work on Ao3! 

“Riou, Riou, Riou,”you said outloud,”hes....kind of cute isnt he?”,you said, looking down at dog in your lap who was flipped over, demanding belly rubs. “Aaaaa D/N, I think Im catching feelings. not serious though! I mean, we’ve never even held a conversation but...he is cute...and hot..ahhh!”,you covered your face. No no, it was only proof that he was way out of your league if you continued to list the good things about him. When it came to love, you definitely had the least bit of experience in that area. Besides, your cute dog came into your life and you just sort of got into your own routine. Love had become the last thing on your mind. However, you couldn’t stop yourself from being curious about him. “Well, we saw him yesterday. I say our chances might be low. I have to get ready for work anyway, I have the night shift,”you said towards your dog. You didnt mind the night shifts, but you would rather not have them. Your job was in a pinch though and you were simply too kind to say no. You were a waiter at a restaurant. The only thing that bothered you was coming home down the sketchy streets at night, but you always carried pepper spray with....and maybe a mini knife disguised as a pen. You always made it home safe though....until today. Everything was cleaned up at work and the guests were gone. Your boss offered a ride but you declined, saying your place wasn’t too far. Also you were considering his exhaustion. He was sweet, but you knew the night had been pretty busy and you were understaffed. So, you walked home yourself. You always had your headphones on, looking down at your phone. 5 minutes into your walk, you felt like you heard something, so you stopped and turned around. Seeing a mysterious man, dressed in all black. It just smelled trouble. You walked a bit faster, then faster, eventually you found yourself running as fast as you possibly could until you ran into another person, half afraid it was him, but your terrified eyes disappeared once you saw it was Riou. You bit your lips, trying not to cry and spoke,”t-theres a man chasing me and he-”,before you could finish, Riou walked forward, his hands clenched, waiting for the man to show up. Which, he did. “Sir, you should know not to pick on women or any helpless and innocent being at all,”he said firmly. What happened next made your eyes almost pop out of their sockets. Riou had single-handily taken the guy down, like nothing! Was he a police officer or something? That was way too smooth. You saw him take out his phone, assuming he was calling the cops, then he walked back to you. You quickly bowed,”Thank you so much Busujima-san! really, you saved my life,”you looked up,”how can I repay you?” He shook his head in disagreement,”I used to be a naval officer, my whole job is based on protecting those who cannot protect themselves, so no payment is needed.but you should be more careful at night, do you not read or watch the news?” You bit your lip and looked away,”maybe...not. I suppose I should though. I definitely would have let my boss drive me home,”you said. You now had a frown because you were a bit sad you were so careless. “Im sorry, I really will start doing that from now on but still, thank you again, I really appreciate,”you said, looking up with the small smile you could muster up.  “Come on, I’ll take you home. do not leave my side.”he stated firmly. You nodded and spoke,”u-uh, yea, thanks, sir yes sir,”you said and mentally hit yourself. Really? Sir yes sir? But you were surprised when you heard a chuckle. or...you think you heard a chuckle. It was gone too quickly. Did he laugh at you? Why did he have to keep doing more things each time to pull him to you?

Once you arrived at your doorstep, you bowed your head,”sorry for making you go out of your way to take me back. Please get home safe.” You looked up and you couldn’t believe his next words. “theres no need to worry, I live right there,”he said, pointing to the door next to yours. You were neighbors?! Since when! You could have sworn on your life that no one lived next to you, least of all him. Oh no...and you had screamed so many times. Did he hear that too? Before you could process it, he spoke,”have a goodnight then Y/N-san,”and he left, opening the door to his apartment and shutting it. You quickly went into yours and slid down as you shut the door, your dog greeting you. “No fucking way....”,you said aloud, ignoring the consistent licks on your face.  This was all too much, thank god you had no work tomorrow. 

Change of POV to Rio’s

He closed his door and took off his jacket. What an eventful day. And he did that person seemed so shock he lived next to her? He was already aware of the fact, so why weren’t they. and how could they be so careless? This L/N-san was an interesting person. and their paths seemed to cross a lot. He also needed to get some sleep. First, he had to take a shower though. For the rest of the night though, he couldn’t get L/N out of his head. A bit irritated as to why, he forced himself to sleep sooner than expected.  The next day, he woke up and figured it was cleaning duty. He took out the trash first, opening the door and seeing L/N standing there. Riou blinked as she got scared and dropped her keys. “sorry for the scare,”he said and went to take out his trash. As he went back up to the apartment, he saw L/N and their dog, who went towards Riou. “Hes fine, I dont dislike dogs,”Riou said, bending down and giving him a couple of rubs. “I never asked his name.” he said, while petting him. “Ah, D/N, thats his name,”they responded. “I see, Im done with my pets,”he said as he stood up, looking as they laughed and said,”you dont really have to state that...but thanks, he loves them.” Riou nodded and headed back to his place. That person definitely made fun of him and his way of speaking, but he less upset, and more couldn’t stop thinking about their smile. Why was that? No...he should turn on some music, do his chores, workout, and forget about it. A couple of hours later, he sat down on the couch. His shirt was off and sweat was dripping down his body. Suddenly, his phone rang and he furrowed his brows,”how much?”,he asked. Dice responded over the phone,”how rude! I just miss your cooking, say say can I come over today please??,”he asked. Riou answered,”by all means. so, how much?” Dice chuckled,”okay you win, I’ll message you the amount.”

Once Dice showed up, Riou let him in,”eat first, money second,”he said, blinking as Dice hugged him. “Ri-chan I missed you so muchhh”,he said, moving his head in Riou’s chest. Riou couldn’t take the physical display of affections and took Dice off of him,”thanks, the food is ready.” Dice pouted as he mumbled,”not even an I miss you back.” They sat down at the table and Dice spoke,”soooo, whats going on with Doctor Isolation in these parts? anything new? give me something, you never have anything.” Riou sighed as he ate his food,”I rescued the person who lives next to me from the attacker on the news, will that suffice?”,he said. Dice’s eyes lit up,”Woah! How cool! were they cute?” Riou lowered his eyes,”why is that of any concern? you should just be glad theyre safe.” Dice smirked,”and...do you know their name?” “Yes, why?”,he answered.  “do you think theyre cute?”  “no comment.” 

“you need more friends you know...or even a partner,”Dice said. “I have you, why would I need more?”, Riou asked. Dice frowned,”I make you hang out with me. I want you to have someone you want to hangout with...even though you never make plans with me.” Riou rolled his eyes,”thats because thats you job.” Dice continued to question him about L/N that he eventually kicked the other out...but of course L/N had to be coming back from work. “Dice n-”

“Hey hey! my names Dice! Im this loners friend,”he said as he pointed at Riou,”please take care of him, I’ll leave him in your care,”he turned around,”They are cute by the way, just like you said,”Dice said with a wink, knowing it would it make him mad. He held onto his bag of money and dipped before he was choked,”Buh-bye Ri-chan!~” Riou sighed and looked towards L/N,”sorry...he’s a handful. have a good day.” and then he left. Its not like he could exactly deny what Dice said, then that would just put him in an even stickier situation! He sighed and flopped down on his couch, planning out Dice’s murder in his head.

#riou busujima #hypmic scenarios #riou #riou mason busujima #riou busujima x reader #busujima riou #hypmic #hypmic x reader #hypnosis mic

[rainlynn08]

Weird dreams that have actually come true.

So the first one I had was when I was at an all girls sleepover camp. One night I had a dream about going through a museum with both my moms, my brother, my cousin Elizabeth and her family. We were walking through this area that had the song “ring around the roses” playing over the speakers. I turned to my cousin and said “you know, ring around the rosey a pocket full of posies?” But in the dream I didn’t say it like in the song, there was no tune when I spoke it. So I wake up the next morning and my bunk mates said I was talking in my sleep and that I said outloud “you know, ring around the roses a pocket full of posies?” A few months later, there I was walking through a museum with my family and my cousins family and I spoke those exact words to my cousin. We were walking through a section about the black death.

Another time it was my cousin (same cousin) Elizabeth’s confirmation (Catholic school shit). The night before I had a horrible dream that my mother, brother and I got into a bad accident that involved something going wrong with our car while driving to see my cousin. The next morning I woke up in a panic and was crying hysterically. I told my mom what happened and she said “no Joanna it’s fine were going down you don’t have to come with us if you don’t want to.” My mom was getting ready to leave with my brother and I got dressed really fast and packed a cooler full of ice and water and drinks (it was horribly hot out and my mother has breathing problems so I made sure to bring things that would help her keep cool. She didn’t do too well in My dream). We got into the car and drove off. Everything was going fine and I thought, you know it’s just a dream it’s fine. I was fucking wrong. The power steering went in the car. My brother was driving and he was terrified because we were in the middle of the highway. My mom helped him pull the steering wheel to get the car onto an off ramp and my brother couldn’t get the brakes to work. We had no brakes to stop. He pulled the emergency brake and we stopped under a bridge on a 101 degree day. My mom was already having trouble breathing, so I got my stupid cooler out full of ice packs and drinks and put them all over her. We didn’t know where we were so my brother yelled at a man across the street and the man was about to cross when he got hit by a car. I don’t really remember much after this. My brother tells me I hopped out of the car and ran, dodging on coming traffic to get to the guy. I remember kneeling down next to him trying to keep him conscious just until the paramedics came. I told him stories to keep him awake. The emts came and I told them he has a severe concussion and that he was hit at the hip area. I don’t know who he was. My mom, Kathy, came to get us, and just as we were maybe 15 minutes from home the tire popped on that car but we managed to get to a friendly’s where I got my mom, Beth, inside to cool off. Kathy and Ben were outside changing the tire. We got home after that. Both my moms never said anything to me about my dream until later on. I mentioned it on day and my mom, Beth, said I should have listened.

Recently like not even a month ago I had a dream about an ex of mine. He started seeing this girl he has known for a while and from what I knew they were very happy together. I had a dream they were pregnant. About a week later my boyfriend tells me “hey you have to promise not to say anything to anyone, J and his girl are pregnant. You can’t tell anyone, they haven’t been seeing each other that long” I lost my shit. I told him all about my dream and how I knew that she was pregnant. My boyfriend doesn’t believe in that kind of stuff. He just thought it was funny.

This one is a dream. But I’m fucking terrified of it. I have a long history of suicidal tendencies along with ptsd, bipolar, depression, anxiety, racing thoughts, intrusive thoughts, you name it. Keep that in mind.

I woke up and I was crying out loud. I had tears coming down my face and I was sopping wet from sweating. In the dream I was walking. This wasn’t new England foliage it was more Southern. Like Georgia area and kind of swampy I guess. Lots of weeping willows and roots coming up from the ground. It was kind of humid but not really just a touch. The sun wasn’t really hitting the forest floor but it was day time. It peaked here and there. I had shorts and some shirt on and some shoes. I was really sad or upset about something. I didn’t know what but I felt like my life was over and I needed to walk it off. Well I fell, which isn’t new I’m fairly clumsy. I felt even worse when I fell and my mind drifted to thinking about “well what if I just end it all here?” But I shoved off the feeling because I still had so much to do with my life. I got back up dusted off and kept walking but something was wrong. Everything felt off. The light was a bit too bright, the ground seemed to smooth. I turned around and saw myself on the ground. My wrists were cut open and I was passed out. I started screaming, I started to freak the fuck out. I started yelling “NO NOT LIKE THIS. I DIDNT MEAN TO DO THAT. THAT WASNT SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN NO NO NO. PLEASE NO THIS ISNT SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN” Idk if I was pulled or pushed back into my body but woosh I was back in myself. And I realized I need help fast. I crawled back the way I came hoping someone would be there. I was screaming the whole time. I got to a cul-de-sac and there was a school bus pulling up to pick up a little girl. He had dark hair and tan skin, pink shirt Jean shorts and white sneakers. No backpack though. I screamed. I screamed so loud and the bus went around the circle again and then stopped and the driver got out and rushed to me. I kept screaming “don’t tell Jay. Please don’t tell Jay. I didn’t mean to do this! This isn’t what I wanted! I didn’t want to do this! I didn’t please! I’m so sorry!”

The next day Jay told me about how he would like to live down south some day. I said no way in hell. I told him the dream. He just worries about me now.

I cannot tell the future. These happen at random. I hate these dreams. I hate having dreams that come true. They aren’t something I wait in anticipation for. They are not fun in any way shape or form. They are all true.

@sixpenceee

#sixpenceee #dreams #tw depressing thoughts #tw suicide

[anonymoustalks]

an american, for good or ill, GETS TO DISCRIMINATE

(6-17-20) You both like politics.

You: heyo

Stranger: hi

Stranger: usa here , yourself ?

You: us east

Stranger: any particular political issue that sparks your interest ? by issue, I mean one plank in a platform, not personalities or teams

You: hmm

You: you sound like you have something more specific than me

You: I'm fairly broad and nonspecific i guess

Stranger: ok

Stranger: if you cant discuss one issue at a time

Stranger: then maybe its best you find another chat partner

You: mhm I'm flexible if there's something specific you want to discuss

Stranger: oh

Stranger: well I asked you first

Stranger: and if you wont try

Stranger: then ive little interest

Stranger: so

Stranger: any particular political issue that sparks your interest ? by issue, I mean one plank in a platform, not personalities or teams

You: ^^ I just had rambly thoughts that I wasn't sure if you'd fine interesting

You: let me think...

You: if you come up with something first feel free to go ahead

You: meanwhile I will just search my head lol

You: what are your thoughts on the supreme court lgbt ruling?

Stranger: was it a government funded position ?

You: hm?

You: it's just a ruling on the interpretation of title something

You: extending gender discrimination laws to lgbt people

You: so no, it's not just government funded positions

Stranger: then I guess I disagree with it

You: can you elaborate on why you disagree?

Stranger: ok

Stranger: you used the word discrimination

You: okay, go on?

Stranger: I dont find our government has any right to, nor legal ability to, fight that

Stranger: shall I demonstrate ?

You: we have a number of those laws though?

Stranger: mistakes all

Stranger: shall I demonstrate ?

You: what do you mean?

You: and sure demonstrate

Stranger: ok

Stranger: I have the right to say outloud, that you smell bad

Stranger: first amendment, free speech

Stranger: I have the right to print a pamphlet about your abominable aroma,

Stranger: first amendment, free press

Stranger: I have the right to form a club, where we discuss your foul stench

Stranger: first amendment , free association

Stranger: I have the right to buy a clubhouse for my club, and not let you in it

Stranger: fourth amendment, private property

Stranger: so

Stranger: a government commanded to ensure those four freedoms of mine

Stranger: cannot stop me from being a bigot if I so choose

Stranger: I might not think being a bigot is cool

Stranger: I KNOW its legal

You: mhm I understand your views

Stranger: understand , Stinky ?

Stranger: :)

You: although laws in the united states build upon each other

Stranger: not really

You: the the supreme court rules if they believe that they should be thrown out

Stranger: constitutional law outranks and supercedes mere legislation

You: that is the entire function of the supreme court

Stranger: by design

You: for instance there are a number of civil rights ammendments that are viewed additively on top of the 1st ammendment

Stranger: so americans that think their government has any place fighting "discrimination" are simply flatly forgetting the bill of Rights

Stranger: arent they

Stranger: Stinky ?

You: the older ammendments do not necessarily supercede the later ones

Stranger: so ?

You: at least, that is usually the mainstream consensus with consitutional scholars

Stranger: that isnt what I just told you

Stranger: what I just told you was constitutional law supercedes mere legislation

Stranger: and it does

Stranger: by design

Stranger: so

Stranger: americans that think their government has any place fighting "discrimination" are simply flatly forgetting the bill of Rights arent they Stinky ?

Stranger: an american, for good or ill, GETS TO DISCRIMINATE

Stranger: doesnt he ?

You: yes but the 14th ammendment obligates the US government to "guarantee all persons equal protection of the laws."

Stranger: or will you now

Stranger: just LIE

You: it's in constitutional law

Stranger: about what we went over ?

Stranger: hmmm /

Stranger: whats it gonna be stinky ?

Stranger: do I have my first amendment right to say out loud that you smell bad or do I not ?

Stranger: gonna admit that is the case or gonna lie ?

You: you do have the right to free speech

Stranger: stop right there

Stranger: stinky

Stranger: do I have my first amendment right to print a pamphlet about your stench ?

Stranger: yes or no ?

You: yes you do

Stranger: and I can form the club ?

Stranger: and buy the clubhouse ?

You: yup you have never had that right infringed?

Stranger: so

Stranger: out government

Stranger: *OUR

You: although freedom of speech doesn't protect you from freedom of judgement?

Stranger: its aleady commanded

Stranger: to leave me the fuck alone

You: like I see many alt-righters hating that society hates them

Stranger: if I do ALL those things

Stranger: we just talked about

Stranger: right Stinky ?

Stranger: so

Stranger: OUR GOVERNMENT

Stranger: is powerless to fight discrimination

Stranger: an AMERICAN

Stranger: GETS TO

You: hm not exactly?

Stranger: doesnt he ?

Stranger: hey

Stranger: yes

Stranger: EXACTLY

Stranger: Stinky

Stranger: thats what we just went over

You: no you see, there are many discrimination laws

Stranger: do you have the memory of a goldfish ?

Stranger: mistakes all

Stranger: and all outranked

You: i.e. you can't fire someone from their job just because they're italian

Stranger: by the BoR

Stranger: mistake

Stranger: and in my state you can

Stranger: at will

Stranger: so you are wrong

Stranger: period

Stranger: wake up and see it

You: the 14th amendment of the US guaranteed that the laws that applied to white people also must be applied to black people

Stranger: no

Stranger: that isnt what it says

You: it says "equal protection under the law" word for word

Stranger: and that aint what you just typed

Stranger: CLOWN

You: and what caused jim crow laws to be tossed out

Stranger: anyhow

Stranger: Stinky

Stranger: yer off topic

Stranger: those four things

Stranger: are guaranteed

Stranger: by CONSTITUTIONAL LAW

You: and so are all the other ammendments

You: ?

Stranger: that outranks all the later mistakes you are going to point at , understand ?

You: The 13, 14, 15, 19, 23, 24, and 26 are all civil rights ammendments

You: and in constitutional law

Stranger: and are off topic

You: no they are not lol

Stranger: and have nothing to do

You: you are dumb

Stranger: with my club

Stranger: with me calling you Stinky

Stranger: you cant stay on the topic

You: you are literally blind only looking at one part of the constitution and deciding to disregard looking at the rest of it

You: it's hilarious

Stranger: because you dont want to admit

Stranger: that you are wrong

Stranger: that you thought

Stranger: the US government had some business fighting discrimination

Stranger: and I just showed you

Stranger: it doesnt

Stranger: its commanded not to

Stranger: and you will refuse to see

Stranger: and start lying

Stranger: in order to not face it

Stranger: wont you

Stranger: Stinky ?

You: lol you didn't show anything except of the fact that you stopped reading the constitution after the 1st ammendment

Stranger: I did

Stranger: and you know it

Stranger: Stinky

You: did you stop reading the bible at genesis as well?

Stranger: this tactic you are trying is a fail

Stranger: Stinky

You: lol

Stranger: back to topic

Stranger: you thought the US government had some business fighting discrimination

Stranger: you were wrong about that

Stranger: the US government is expressly commanded to ensure I have all the tools I need to be a bigot if I so choose

Stranger: you are simpyl flatly wrong

Stranger: a lot of nice people

Stranger: well intentioned people

Stranger: were also wrong

You: mhm you have your freedom of speech until it conflicts with another ammendment

Stranger: and the laws you point to

Stranger: are mistakes

Stranger: and violate the BoR

Stranger: and you

Stranger: will sit there

You: those ammendments are just as much as part of the constitution as the 1st ammendment

Stranger: TRYING AS HARD AS YOU CAN

Stranger: NOT TO LEARN ANYTHING

You: lol you're trying really really really hard

You: it's super funny

Stranger: its you doing that

Stranger: trying SUPER HARD

Stranger: to not have to admit you had it wrong

You: "SUPER HARD" rofl

Stranger: but you do have it wrong Stinky

Stranger: and I demonstrated it

Stranger: and you know it

You: you remind me of little kids typing in all caps on the internet lol

Stranger: I have the right to say outloud, that you smell bad You: first amendment, free speech You: I have the right to print a pamphlet about your abominable aroma, You: first amendment, free press You: I have the right to form a club, where we discuss your foul stench You: first amendment , free association You: I have the right to buy a clubhouse for my club, and not let you in it You: fourth amendment, private property You: so You: a government commanded to ensure those four freedoms of mine You: cannot stop me from being a bigot if I so choose You: I might not think being a bigot is cool You: I KNOW its legal

You: yes you do have that right

You: lol

Stranger: so

Stranger: you should admit

You: and people also have the right to look at you and laugh because you're an idiot

Stranger: what you thought up until just a second ago

Stranger: was incorrect

Stranger: you should learn to learn

You: lol

Stranger: thats the fundamental and painful part of learning

Stranger: admitting that what you thought before was wrong

Stranger: that you were wrong

You: you know what I don't understand?

Stranger: it hurts buts its STILL worth it

You: you people crying censorship

You: because you're not censored

Stranger: ?

You: you're just afraid of speaking your mind

Stranger: no idea what yer blathering about

You: because you're afraid your neighbors will judge you

You: that's just fear

Stranger: you sound like an insane person right now

You: there's no law anywhere saying you can;t publish or write what you want

Stranger: and as we can see from this convo

Stranger: I have no fear of speaking my mind

Stranger: so

Stranger: back to topic champ

You: lol are you going to go to on the streeet and shout this as well?

Stranger: yawn

You: or are you only brave enough to say this on the Internet?

You: hey you have the right to go outside and scream this at the top of the lungs

Stranger: yeah champ

You: the police won't arrest you

Stranger: I insist on the BoR

You: you know that

Stranger: all day

Stranger: every day

Stranger: now

You: your neighbors will think you are crazy though

Stranger: off of your AD HOMINEM FISHING

Stranger: and back to the topic

Stranger: im not the topic

Stranger: dont ask about ME again

You: lol "stinky" aint ad hominen fishing lol?

Stranger: back to topic

Stranger: hey

Stranger: how would I know what you smell like ?

You: I just doing exactly what you say we should do with the 1st ammendment

Stranger: grow the fuck up

You: I can say what I want lol

Stranger: its EXACTLY

You: just like you can too

Stranger: an example

Stranger: and it works

Stranger: and you know it works

Stranger: and thats whats got you upset

Stranger: Stinky

Stranger: :)

You: uh no, you're the one who's upset lol

Stranger: sure I am

You: because you hate that you didn't know about the later ammendments lol

Stranger: what a silly thing to assert

Stranger: I know about all the amendments

You: rofl

Stranger: and your off topic jaunt there

Stranger: didnt help you

Stranger: Stinky

You: "off topic"

Stranger: yeah

You: you're funny

Stranger: very much so

Stranger: I have the right to say outloud, that you smell bad You: first amendment, free speech You: I have the right to print a pamphlet about your abominable aroma, You: first amendment, free press You: I have the right to form a club, where we discuss your foul stench You: first amendment , free association You: I have the right to buy a clubhouse for my club, and not let you in it You: fourth amendment, private property You: so You: a government commanded to ensure those four freedoms of mine You: cannot stop me from being a bigot if I so choose You: I might not think being a bigot is cool You: I KNOW its legal

Stranger: all of that is true

You: lol

Stranger: no matter what you say

You: and so are all the other ammendments

Stranger: about any other amendment

Stranger: so

Stranger: you still lose

Stranger: period

Stranger: OFF TOPIC

You: lol it's not

Stranger: yes it very much is

You: because the civil rights ammendments are literally about anti-discrimination

Stranger: hi asshole

Stranger: the CRAo64

Stranger: is mere legislation

Stranger: and is not an amendment

You: no the ammendments are ammendments

Stranger: lol

You: stupid bathroom stuff is legislation

Stranger: civil rights amendments

Stranger: no such fucking thing

You: lol you have no idea how to google

Stranger: you dont

Stranger: idiot

Stranger: the 14th

Stranger: aint relevant here

Stranger: MORON

Stranger: THAT IS WHY

Stranger: I ASKED

You: can you google "civil rights ammendments?"

You: lol

Stranger: IF ITS A GOVERNMENT JOB

Stranger: MORON

You: lol it's not just that lol

Stranger: the GOVERNMENT

Stranger: is obliged

Stranger: to apply all the laws the same

Stranger: PRIVATE ENTITIES ARENT

Stranger: the Rockettes

Stranger: can fire a fat girl

Stranger: you are fucking wrong

Stranger: and you cannot think

Stranger: now fuck off

You: lol

Stranger has disconnected.

#omegle #racism #discrimination #freedom of speech #first ammendment #constituion #bill of rights #14th amendment #angry