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#who learns that people love many times in their lives
nicksbestie · 3 days
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Kittens - M. Sturniolo
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Summary : One specific person becomes a regular at the animal shelter you work at, always visiting the cats <3
Warnings : mentions of anxiety but nothing graphic!
Word Count : 1614
Pairing : Matt Sturniolo/Reader
A/N : i'm a sucker for baby animals and matt <3 maybe there will be a part two for this?
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You have always been an animal lover.
You’d grown up in a house full of pets, so really, it was no surprise that you had ended up working in an animal shelter, taking care of all of the pets there until they found a loving home. You worked at a no-kill shelter, and you were grateful for that, because there was no way you could get attached and then have to watch them die simply because nobody had chosen them yet. You worked there because you couldn’t take them all home with you, so you would spend a ton of time with them at the shelter to show them all of the love you wished you could give them forever. You couldn’t lie, sometimes your job broke your heart, for a multitude of reasons. 
Sometimes it was because you got attached to the animals, and then they got adopted. You were of course so happy that they got a loving family, but you did wish that you could be there for them, so it was a bittersweet feeling. Other times, you watched adoption paper after adoption paper fall through, and perfectly loving animals stayed in their kennels or were returned by families who had changed their minds. Even worse was when you saw the strays and abused animals come in, mangled and dirty, sometimes badly injured, and you hated the way they flinched away from you out of fear. You always made sure to show extra love to those ones, to let them know that regardless of what had happened they were in a safe place now, even though it wasn’t a luxurious home. 
You loved getting a chance to turn these animals' lives around, to make them feel better and redirect them to a family or person that would love them for the rest of their life, and you loved how many other people showed up for them as well. There were often people who came in to donate food, toys, leashes, or even just money, knowing that they didn’t want to adopt an animal or didn’t have the capacity to take one in, but still wanted to make a difference, regardless of how small. Every donation was always appreciated so much, and really did go to very helpful results. There were also the groups of friends that came in, the occasional birthday party for some younger kids who love puppies, and those often ended in an adoption or two, which warmed your heart.
And then there were the regulars. The people who couldn’t take any animals home, but loved them too much to not come visit them. The people who were there just as often as the workers were, nearly every day, who formed bonds with the younger and older dogs, and brought the shyer ones out of their shell. You were so grateful for the regulars because they really did help in forming trust between the animals and the humans. It helped with their socialization a great deal, and it had positive effects on the animals. The only thing that occasionally wasn’t great about it was that these animals would get attached to them, and be incredibly sad when they left, or when someone else took them home, but they always ended up okay in the long run. 
The workers also connected with the regulars, and some of them even joined the volunteer group, which was a great help because there was always something to do there. It was nice to have extra pairs of hands every now and then, especially when they were always willing to do something to better the lives of the animals they loved enough to come visit multiple times a week. You knew all of the current regulars by name, but you had noticed one boy who kept coming often enough that it seemed like he was going to become a regular. And you had yet to learn his name. 
He didn’t come every day like most of the regulars did, but he was here a lot. A little too often to just be popping by. He showed up every Wednesday and Friday, normally in the afternoon, and stayed until closing. He spent most of his time with the kittens, and it was heartwarming to see someone bond with all of the new babies. New kittens came into the shelter more often than people thought, as a lot of people abandoned kittens or pregnant cats because they had become too expensive or too much work to take care of. It was just that a lot of the kittens weren’t out to the available adoption areas because they needed medical testing, checkups, vaccines, and a lot of extra care. A lot of immediate human interaction paired with a weak immune system could be a threat to their health.
On the days that there weren’t kittens out, because they did get adopted very quickly, this boy would go see the puppies first. He seemed to be a cat lover, but he also seemed to like the younger animals, like most people. If there weren’t a lot, or they were playing with other people, he would find an older animal, whether that be a cat or dog, and spend the rest of his time with them. One thing you noticed was that it didn’t matter what he was doing with the pet. The pet could be ignoring him, too anxious or shy, (you noticed he always sat with the fearful ones), and he would simply sit with it and wait, offering treats, pets, and if they didn’t want to sit next to him, he would scroll on his phone and let them come to him. He seemed to have a special connection with the vulnerable pets, and you wondered what that said about him.
The biggest thing that you noticed about him was that he never smiled when he was coming in. He would wave, look up, nod, something like that, acknowledge the people at the front desk being there. Sometimes you were the one checking people in, but he never smiled. Not until he was sitting down with an animal in a short vicinity of him, and you noticed that he smiled the biggest when he was sitting on the floor with a pet in his lap. He never smiled when he was walking in, because sometimes you could see him getting out of his car, never as he was checking in, but he did as soon as he was with an animal, and he always left looking a lot lighter than when he came in. He always left the building smiling. 
He had come in for three weeks in a row before you ever said a word to him, and the first thing you said to him was a simple “Welcome back.” He snapped his head up at this, looking confused, as if he hadn’t realized that he had been perceived coming in so often. And maybe by most of the employees, he hadn’t been, but you made it a habit to notice people, even the people who looked like they didn’t want to be noticed. He gave you his usual nod, before moving towards the door to the Cat Cottages. Unfortunately, that day, the kittens had been moved to a different room so that the normal room could be deep cleaned, so you let your coworker cover the front desk and followed him, tapping him on the shoulder just as he reached the door to the cat rooms. He spun around, a seemingly shocked look on his face.
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you! I just wanted you to know that the cats have been moved today.”
He looked confused, simply staring at you blankly. 
“Sorry. I was just telling you because you always go to the cats first, so I figured I would save you having to turn around.”
He was still blankly staring at you but this time he spoke.
“You noticed I always go to the cats first.” 
You nodded, listening.
“Yes. I do. You always come here first.” 
“I didn’t think you’d noticed. I mean, I notice you when I come in, but I always assumed that you saw so many people per day that you didn’t have time to notice anyone else.”
You smiled brightly at him, hoping to help him feel more comfortable.
“I always notice our regulars.”
“Do I qualify as a regular?” 
 “You show up on the same two days every week, always in the afternoon, for the past month and a half. I think that falls under regular territory. Now, would you like me to show you where the cats are today?” 
He broke a smile for the first time, the first time you’d ever seen him smile before getting to visit with the cats.
“Yes, please.”
As you walked down the hallway to the holding room that the cats were in today, you learned that the boy’s name was Matt, and he opened up a little bit to you. He told you that he came to visit with the animals because they help a lot with his anxiety.
“They really seem to bond with you. It seems like they really do love you. You have one of those souls.” 
He laughed, sitting down and smiling as a kitten stepped into his lap, pushing its head into his hands.
“You can tell what kind of soul I have?” 
“I don’t need to know you well to know that.”
As you motioned to the animals surrounding you both, you smiled at him, and he smiled right back up.
“Their judgment tells me everything I need to know.”
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tossawary · 1 day
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I was thinking about Xie Lian being able to snap the Xin Mo sword in half with his bare hands again, and then I thought to myself... "Wait, Xie Lian and Luo Binghe interaction could be really cute, though?"
Like, let's say that Xie Lian, during his time as a wandering trash god, accidentally falls into an interdimensional rift and ends up in the SVSSS world. His luck is bad like that. But while this is weird, sure, it's not that bad! The worlds are pretty similar and he can still make his living! So, Xie Lian wanders along as usual, curiously learning about this new world, picking through trash, occasionally punching demonic beasts to death to rescue awed civilians.
And at some point, Xie Lian runs into a young Luo Binghe while he's living on the streets. Let's say that Xie Lian rolls into town shortly before the death of Binghe's adoptive mother, has a few sweet encounters with this cute and kind child who doesn't have much to spare for a trash collector, and is there to comfort his new young friend when Binghe's adoptive mother passes away. Xie Lian is still there when Binghe gets thrown out onto the streets and he agrees to help the boy travel to Cang Qiong Mountain Sect.
So, Binghe gets to spend a month or two as a trash-collecting god's apprentice! He doesn't know that Xie Lian is a god. He suspects that Xie Lian is just a very powerful rogue cultivator who is living very humbly for some reason. The time isn't entirely pleasant, because life is hard and Binghe is grieving, but Xie Lian understands pain very well and is an excellent companion. He sees Binghe safely to Cang Qiong.
At which point, clingy Binghe does not want to separate from this extremely nice person, but Xie Lian insists on it. He wants Binghe to have a better life. He's worried that his bad luck will somehow spread to this poor boy who reminds him of so many other people he's loved and lost. Xie Lian supervises the confusing entrance exam, while the adult Cang Qiong cultivators desperately try to figure out who this strange person is (Airplane Bro is going "???!!!"), and then leaves wistfully. Binghe will later look back on this particular period of his life very fondly.
Xie Lian can then go in and out of the SVSSS plot as a person pleases! I think it would be very funny if Liu Qingge ended up with an unwilling crush on Xie Lian as well, when they have a spar for some reason and Xie Lian handily SLAMS him into the ground. Xie Lian would probably end up running into Tianlang-Jun and Zhuzhi-Lang somehow, both of whom I think would end up being a little obsessed with him.
I think that the best place to bring Xie Lian and Binghe back together is maybe after Binghe escapes the Endless Abyss. So that Binghe can have a nice cry session on Xie Lian's shoulder. Xie Lian can possibly then introduce Binghe to Tianlang-Jun and Zhuzhi-Lang. Or else generally fumble his way through facilitating Bingqiu actually communicating and being less of a painful mess. Shen Qingqiu (Shen Yuan) is very confused by this character?! Where did he come from??? Who is he??? He's very nice, though, and Shen Qingqiu is feeling maybe a liiiiittle jealous over Binghe.
(I don't know how to handle the System in this AU, but I do like the idea of the System just... not being able to handle Xie Lian. Xie Lian is a god from a different worldbuild. He kind of just breaks everything.)
(If you want to get a little angsty and ghostly, you could have a plotline in which Xie Lian helps the ghost of Shen Jiu somehow. Qijiu resolution?)
Binghe would probably be open to the idea of getting together with Xie Lian as well as Shen Qingqiu. He has a type! He is full of love! But Xie Lian is definitely not interested and is very good at wiggling away from come-ons, so Binghe respectfully doesn't pursue that passing thought / childhood crush, no matter what Tianlang-Jun is saying about threesomes again.
Binghe ends up using the (tamed? broken?) Xin Mo sword to send Xie Lian (his "gege") back to Xie Lian's own world. (Or Mobei-Jun could maybe do it?) Xie Lian has been gone for years and wants to see how his world is doing. Binghe tearfully promises to visit him regularly and to come get him WHENEVER HE WANTS. Xie Lian pats his head and agrees to stay in touch.
So, then Xie Lian tumbles out back into his own world and into the start of the plot of TGCF. And at any point in the plot of TGCF, he's now able to summon a heavenly demon from another dimension (with a super powerful sword that can move mountains?) who would absolutely be willing to fight all of heaven for him.
Xie Lian generally isn't going to do this, because he doesn't want to involve Binghe in his problems, even though Binghe is CHEWING THE WALLS with the desire to help him in return. However, Xie Lian does really like to go out with Binghe and Shen Qingqiu (and sometimes people like Airplane Bro and Mobei-Jun and Liu Qingge as well) to nice restaurants every other week or so. "So, what's new?" "Oh, I've ascended to heaven again and it's a little troublesome, ha ha. How are you?"
Hua Cheng is... nonplussed. On one hand, he's a little jealous. On the other hand, FINALLY, people can recognize that Xie Lian is the best person in the world. Luo Binghe has GOOD TASTE and is just some well-meaning kid whom Xie Lian likes a lot and who rightly thinks heaven sucks. Hua Cheng is determinedly shaking Luo Binghe's hand and giving him advice from a Ghost King to a future Demon Emperor.
(Tianlang-Jun CANNOT be allowed into Ghost City. He will NOT leave. I think that Hua Cheng is strong enough to throw him out if necessary, but Tianlang-Jun and Zhuzhi-Lang would just keep slipping back in somehow. Permanently banned from the gambling tables no matter what he offers, but Tianlang-Jun is still allowed to hang out at the Ghost City playhouse because he quickly becomes the favorite audience member of all of the ghost actors. He has AWFUL taste. Yin Yu hates them.)
(Also, I do think that Xie Lian would not really like the Xin Mo sword at all. E'ming is a beautiful baby boy made from and by Hua Cheng, who is Xie Lian's favorite person in the world who has never done anything wrong ever. Xin Mo is some random blade that destroys Luo Binghe's mental health and turns him into the worst version of himself! Xie Lian could and possibly should snap that possession sword like a twig.)
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superdillin · 2 days
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It is Armenian Genocide Remembrance Day
And I have some big feelings, as a part of the diaspora. Remembrance Day is an inappropriate title for a time in which Armenians still face genocidal forces. Just last year, Azerbaijan, armed by Turkey, ethnically cleansed over 280,000 Armenians from Artsakh. The illegal colonizer state of Israel, currently in the midst of their 6+ month-long genocide against the Palestinians, has placed the Armenians who call Jerusalem home under threat and siege.
The Armenian struggle and the Palestinian struggle are deeply linked.
In his rise to power, Hitler is quoted to justify his actions against the Jewish, Roma, Queer, Disabled, and other victims of the Holocaust, to say "Who, after all, speaks today of the annihilation of the Armenians?"
Echoing these chilling words, Palestinian poet Najwan Darwish wrote:
Who Remembers the Armenians? I remember them and I ride the nightmare bus with them each night and my coffee, this morning I'm drinking it with them You, murderer - Who remembers you?
The trauma sustained during a genocide is not limited to the people experiencing it right now. The echoes of that trauma leak forward into the next generations, passed down through survival, and that is so insidious. My grandmother got to live, but did so believing that her parents did not love her, because the trauma they endured prevented them from expressing it. Abuse and unhealthy attachment were passed down because that starving hunger for love and acceptance was passed down. It is so deeply cruel and unfair that our oppressors get to reach through time and hurt our children's children.
We need to band together and stop the present-day abusers, the genocidal monsters that oppress the people of Palestine, Armenia, Congo, and so many others.
We need to uplift art made by those who survived, and by those who are surviving. Art is always targeted by the oppressor to erase cultural identity, to destroy legacy, and to break spirits. Support Palestinian and Armenian poets, and artists, and writers.
If you are one of the many who never learned about the Armenian Genocide, learn today. Ask yourself why people worked so hard not to educate you on this piece of history.
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ystrike1 · 2 days
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Boss, Bxtch, Baby! - By Ichibu Saki (8/10)
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Would you let someone lock you up for half a million dollars? You're not getting it for free. You have to follow extremely strict rules, and you have to stay inside a mansion allll day. For months on end. Hey! Put that pen down! Don't sign without reading the fine print! Being a pet isn't an easy job!
Hojin is a man who has given up. Family bonds are too complicated. He can't keep a man no matter how hard he tries. He's deep in debt because his brother betrayed him. He's a sweet and giving person.....because he's afraid of being alone.
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The loan sharks find him. He thinks he'll die with nothing in life, but then a group of men in suits appears out of nowhere.
The group claims a VIP wants him, and said VIP is willing to pay off his debts.
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Being rich and gay in Korea sucks. Especially when your family is mostly comprised of sociopaths. Yooseong had a very good time with Hojin, but he can't date right now. Inheriting the family business is his main priority, and the head of the family is scared of gay people.
He needs a pet lover. Someone literally willing to hide in a bunker and wait for him.
Yooseong totally doesn't have issues and he definitely doesn't get violent and possessive when he likes someone! Don't misunderstand! He just has to lock up Hojin to keep his family off his tail.
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Hojin says no.
Yooseong snaps his fingers.
The suits hold Hojin down until he signs the paperwork.
One year. Debt clear. Total obedience.
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Yooseong is way too controlling he is literally insane, but we gradually see why the heck he is the way he is.
Yooseong and Hojin are both deeply insecure in different ways.
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Hojin falls in love first.
Yooseong was obsessed from the beginning, but Hojin is the first one to admit that living together with a stud kinda rocks.
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Shocker Hojin has toxic attachment issues....but they're a different breed.
His father abused his mother, but he won her back with money. Then his mother regretted returning to her abusive husband. She left once more, and Hojin left with her.
Hojin learned that only kind people deserve love, and some mistakes can't be forgiven.
He's had many lovers, but they all leave him eventually.
He's a clingy people-pleaser who falls in love out of desperation...not love.
Yooseong doesn't trust him, but Hojin is so messed up that he doesn't understand how shallow his doting love is.
Yooseong enjoys it. They fall into twisted pleasure together.
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Yooseong's annoying little brother is annoying because he's straight.
He was going to inherit the company, even though he's a moron, just because he's straight. Yooseong was passed over entirely because he was gay.
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Lil bro does mess up on purpose so Yooseong can have the position he deserves but he's still a messy loser annoying short guy.
Yooseong's massive ego makes his family relationships....cold af.
Yooseong is insane so he beats up Hojins brother. The same brother that saddled him with debt.
Hojin never finds out because Yooseong learns that Hojin hates violent declarations of love, and he loves his horrible brother too much to ever see him again.
He wants to keep the good memories, but he can't interact with the man who sold him away.
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Yooseong becomes even more unreasonable though, and he starts to become really unlikable as a person. He's a GREAT controlling yandere but Hojin is a nice guy with no family and not much to live for. It's hard not to feel bad for him when Yooseong treats him like an object.
This one is a mixed bag, but it's very tense and it can be funny.
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fishnapple · 10 hours
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CRYSTAL READING: What should you cultivate more in yourself ?
A little explanation of the method I used for reading
Lithomancy : I assigned a meaning for each stone (each stone represents a planet) and cast them on a circle divided into 12 parts, just like an astrology chart and do the reading
Pick a stone :
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Reading for each group below :
1. Red jasper
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I see a pyramid with strong foundation.
You would need to build a shelter in yourself to stay calm amidst a hectic life.
Life may give you lots of hardship, but if you know how to stay rooted in yourself, you can weather any storms coming your way.
To do that, you need to find your authentic ideals, your own aspirations in life, without outside's interference. Like a personal compass. No matter what you do, where you go, that compass can guide you to the right direction.
But to be able to make that compass, you would need to open up to your own self.
I see that some parts of your are hidden in your own eyes. You need to see all of yourself, both light and dark, both strength and weakness, both selfish desires and selfless devotion. A dichotomy within yourself. It is the opposition that keeps you balanced.
2.Citrine
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A leaf or a boat, tenderly floating in the stream. If you could let your heart lead your life and follow the natural flow, you will see that life would be so much easier.
You will be able to see that life works in a very cyclical way. Allow yourself to unfold naturally with time. There is no need to rush.
Strangely enough, by doing that, you would appear to the world as a person holding so much inner power.
I could see that with time, you will become so much more at ease with yourself, and that will create a natural confidence.
Going with the flow of life does not mean doing nothing. It means seeing your dream and having the bravery to take concrete but harmonious steps to come closer to that dream. You would need to cultivate a lion's heart, bravely facing your hidden fears, guilts, and confusions hiding in the dark.
3.Pyrite
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There is a focus on relationships.
You have an idealistic approach to romance with lots of fantasies and confusion.
That tends to attract the type of people who are aggressive, domineering, and have a big ego. This kind of relationship would bring lots of stress and disappointment to you.
I notice that my tone for this group is more curt and to the point. Maybe that's how some people feel when they are in your energy. Your energy would bring out some shadows in people.
Sometimes, people would actually have some dark impulses toward goodness. Light would bring out shadow. I'm saying this because I see that opposite of the heavy energy people that you attract, you have a gentle and light energy.
What you should cultivate is a sense of boundary and authority for yourself.
Keep the light, but be more detached and see clearly of what you want, how you want to be treated, and how you can feel nourished in a relationship. Maybe not too focused on 1 on 1 relationship, but be more open to being a part of a community. I see that you are meant to be a soul of freedom, not chained by other's egos.
4.Rose quartz
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The energy of a mentor, a teacher.
There is something so strong yet very warm and loving about your energy.
You don't need to be actually in the teaching profession to teach. The way you express yourself, the way you live your life, the way you honour your emotions, and let your inner child shine can inspire many people. People want to learn from you.
I think that you don't need to cultivate something particular, but more like noticing things about yourself to be more aware and navigate them more easily. The strongest thing is the voice. The voice of authority. Be the voice of truth that speaks deep into people's hearts. Even sometimes, that would make people uncomfortable.
I see a playful child with a sharp tongue that speaks some acute observations about the world, but nobody feels offended. That is the special power of children. You could still retain some of that power within you.
5.Obsidian
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I immediately see the number four and the Jupiter's glyph (♃, when I actually searched the glyph again, it was a little different from the crystal's image, but I couldn't shake the association) Another thing about Jupiter is that the stone for Jupiter landed on the highest position of the chart, stands between two black obsidian stones (one was the one I chose to represent place of focus, one was this group that you chose). So the theme of Jupiter would be where you should put more focus on cultivating. Travelling, religion, and foreign cultures will bring in lots of transformation for you.
Also, if you are more open about your wish and desires, you would manifest them much easier, broadcast to the universe, and let the universe listen to you. If you feel restricted and not comfortable showing your individuality, this is the message for you to show your light to the world more. Many would appreciate that.
6.Flourite
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There is a sense of urgency in this group. The universe is sending you a very urgent message.
It is time to build your lasting legacy. There is something you're meant to create for the mass. It could be something to do with words, something verbal, creative writing, or things created by hands. Things that stir the imagination and deep emotions of the audience. Making this work will bring you sudden fortunes and blessings.
Tap into your dreams. You could get lots of inspiration or source materials from the dreams you have while sleeping or even daydreams. Don't ignore the images. When you put your attention to them, the messages will be clearer to you. Translate them into your works with dedication and steadiness and bring them to life.
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sailor-aviator · 10 hours
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Hey.
Go ahead and get settled because this will be...long, in true Liz fashion.
So, by now I'm sure most of you have heard what's happened. If not, you can search this blog for some answers or others for more.
I joined this fandom offiicially at the end of September after being a long time lurker. I had just lost my job and times were uncertain for me. I felt inspired to write, and as someone whose formative years were shaped by the fandom experience, I wanted to feel that sense of belonging again - to feel like a part of a community. I've talked about it on here before, but I started my fandom days in the original Hunger Games fandom when the first movie had just come out, and then I shifted gears towards the SuperWhoLock fandom. If you know anything about SuperWhoLock, then you know you had to have pretty tough fucking skin to be a part of any of it.
Of course, this was back in the day when fandom was an actual community and not authors having to beg for scraps of engagement and people thinking its a numbers game. I was a fairly large blog within the SuperWhoLock community (Waywardly-Carrying-On was the username), but I left fandom for a few years because life got hectic and I felt like I had outgrown the fandom itself as I was no longer watching any of the shows. As the years went on, I started to yearn for the fandom experience again, which is how I found myself dipping toes into several different ones.
I was so excited to publish my first fanfic. I had convinced myself that I wasn't a good writer (much to the chagrin of my irl friends), and I had put a pause on writing my original story. I wanted to write this idea about a cowboy and a girl using characters that I had grown to love like I did way back in my older days. So, I started posting, and I was so excited for the story, that I kept posting almost daily. MamaMay was one of the first people to embrace not only my story, but me as a person into the fandom. She made me feel welcomed and wanted.
Pretty much right off the bat I was already getting anons telling me that I was being too much and that I needed to calm down with all the posting. I was confused because...this is Tumblr. It's literally a blogging website? Why wouldn't I post? I decided to ignore the mean words (not before giving my opinion, of course) and kept on doing my thing. Well, the anons got continually worse and worse. I had a suspiscion as to who the anons could be, but I never had concrete proof. So, I experimented with blocking suspects until finally it worked. I'm not naming names because that's not my style, so don't even bother asking.
The fact of the matter is, some of you have entered fandom spaces for the first time, and you don't know how to act. You don't care to learn fandom etiquette as you've made abundantly clear by calling fandom olds every name under the sun while utilizing the anonymous feature. Newsflash, you're part of the problem. You're the reason why authors don't want to publish anymore. You are the reason that something that's supposed to be fun is starting to feel like a goddamn chore.
How many times can authors on here say that we aren't machines? We have lives outside of this website: family, friends, jobs, school, etc. Some of you really are just hellbent on making everyone around you miserable, and it's sad. You can't just leave well enough alone and let people enjoy something, no you feel like everyone has to enjoy it the same way as you.
Some of you go after authors on here because of some weird sense of jealousy too. I don't know why my shit blew up, babe, I really don't. But I started out with no followers and no support just like everyone else. I'll tell you what helped me though: following fandom etiquette and reaching out to other creators to build an actual community. None of this "I've reblogged three of your things and now I'm messaging you so that you return the favor." No, I reached out to make actual friendships which is what fandom is SUPPOSED to be. If someone was clearly not interested, it was fine!! I backed off and kept doing my own thing.
Some of you think being mean on the internet makes you big and bad. Guess what! It doesn't! It's loser mentality and I feel genuinely sorry for you. I'm sorry that people in your own life made you feel so small as to feel like you had to lash out at strangers on the internet who are just trying to have fun.
Anyway, this is my really long way of saying that I am taking a break for a little bit. I have no idea how long it will be - could be the weekend, could be a couple of weeks, could be forever. I need time to decide if this is something I want to keep persuing. If I come back, I don't know if I will remain a TGM blog or if I'll shift gears and hop into another fandom with a rebrand. Guess we'll just have to see.
To the people on here who have been a constant source of joy, laughter, and support: thank you. From the bottom of my heart. Your presence has meant everything to me, and I hope that my break sees me wanting to come back and giggle about the silly plane movie with you all again.
Nothing but love,
Liz 💛
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ladypeonies · 1 day
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"Acting is a dangerous profession."
credit.
Some people will watch this extract and just brush if off perhaps as fanservice and miss the point completely. What I like about Chris and Xuan it’s how candid and honest they are about the whole process.
The host says it all, “acting is a dangerous profession,” and both actors agreed. She’s right. So many fans don’t get it, and they focus on the superficial. It’s not just a dangerous profession in Asia. In my opinion it’s more challenging there because most of entertainment industries in Asia rely a lot on Method acting and immersion. You have notice how they call themselves by their character names, on and off set and it has several purposes. I won’t dwell on them here because this post would be too long.
And you have method acting which I have several issues with. It’s basically psychology. I’m not going to write an essay on it here, it basically means one can convince themselves of anything and you can become anyone you want. It’s becoming someone else entirely for a time, by changing your habits based on your environment. You study a character and become them, by assuming their point of view, mannerism, state of mind etc. If they drink you start drinking, if they love someone you love them too etc. Some actors are strongly against method acting for a reason and stick to use their imagination which is way safer. In a live Xuan talked about how physically and mentally it impacted him.
You are still yourself but you can’t escape your character, their emotions bleeds into you. And you use it to play the best version of them by using your body. Of course, Xuan fell in love with his co-star and had all those “evil” thoughts. He learned to fall in love with him and make him the centre of his universe. The preparation for the role, to build a bond took longer than the whole filming.
So, any actor in their shoes will feel the same, if they say no well, they are either lying or just bad method actors, that’s it, no in between.
The trick is to use those emotions while filming and then to be able to let them go. And that’s the issue, because for many it takes time to do so and get rid of them. Notice how Xuan doesn’t say while they were filming NC scenes he had evil thoughts but he was sitting there, so before or even after. The thing is if you hold on to those emotions it can hurt your mental health. They can be addictive. Under those circumstances sometimes there is a co-pendency which appear between actors. I remember an actor explaining how he basically went through a heartbreak because he got attached to his co-star who was engaged to someone else and he was full of emotions for his on-screen partner. And those emotions weren’t there before they started filming. And they knew each other, they were friends before and he never felt that way about them. And his mind knew they weren’t a good match but he kept longing for them.
I talked here about the bubble actors found themselves in. And the best remedy to get rid of those feelings, thoughts are a healthy distance, and being back to oneself. I hear often, “they’re just acting, it’s their job…” etc. Actors aren’t robot. There is a process to play a role and they all have a process to get out of a particular challenging role. Obviously, all roles aren’t the same.
Another thing: Chris and Xuan are friends and were friends but under the circumstances, they don’t have the same friendship they had before filming, the one from a year or two years ago. Friendship 101 had specific boundaries, and now there are new ones in friendship 201. It’s not possible to know the taste of your friend’s mouth, their skin, and be in the same exact friendship. Actors are not robots there isn’t a reset button. Now there is a new set of boundaries. Perhaps before there wasn’t any skinship now because there are use to each other touch, there is more skinship. Before they wouldn’t talk about certain subject, now they can. I believe they gain and also lost some things. The only possibility MAYBE to go back to friendship 101 would be a complete separation for weeks, reset. But it’s not happening because there are promotions and also, you get use to seeing each other all the time, I guess.
Now method acting and falling in love, it happens of course, but has to go through the test of time and distance.
One has a girlfriend/boyfriend and start method acting with a co-star LOL. 9 out 10 people will break up with their significant other, the GF or BF will leave, it happens all the time.
PS1: I also took the opportunity to answer a couple of asks.
PS2 :Translation by Wava please be kind to your translators and grateful for the work they do, I personally hate translating it can be so taxing.
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amoromniaodium · 1 day
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I hate angst, but Clegan has been making me feel horribly sad. I wanted to see if any of you are interest in an extremely angst fic. I am posting for the first time this is my first full on prompt I hope you guys like it. This is probably horrible but here you go:
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Gale Cleven was born unloved. His father despised him, beat him, and screamed at him. His mother was coldly indifferent to her husband's treatment of their only son. This harsh upbringing forced Gale to adapt to any environment, learning to read people so effectively that he could almost predict their words and reactions. However, sometimes his gift didn't work properly he does not see it coming; his scars and bruises from his father were telltale.
Gale Cleven grew up feeling cold and unloved, so detached that it seemed something within him had broken; he had never felt warmth in his life.
Gale Cleven grew up in profound loneliness, constantly questioning if things would ever improve.
He didn’t have friends because he moved so often. His shyness and disinterest in typical boyhood activities meant that no one approached him.
Gale Cleven was always pretty—not handsome but beautiful—and that beauty frightened him.
That is why, when he entered flying school and met the men who made him feel warmth for the first time, Gale Cleven became Buck Cleven—a person with friends and love.
Buck Cleven was born, but Gale Cleven still lurked in the background, waiting for the warmth to fade and the cold to return.
Gale Cleven loved Bucky Egan deeply and loyally; he was the only one for him. This obsession or loyalty might seem abnormal to the average person, but Gale had grown up cold, alone, and unloved, and when he finally felt warmth, he clung to it.
Bucky Egan was the hottest and brightest being out there, the sun that kept him warm on the coldest days.
However, what Gale felt for Bucky Egan was not reciprocated, and it only took one evening outside the pub for him to realize this.
It was at that moment that Buck Cleven broke in half, and Gale Cleven re-emerged. It was then Buck realized that, like the sun, Bucky had many orbiting him. Gale was just one of many, the farthest from the warmth, not even a planet—a dwarf planet like Pluto, forgotten and cast aside.
When Buck Cleven saw Bucky kiss someone he knew, so deeply and lovingly, he realized he meant nothing.
Isn’t it funny how naive he was to think that someone like Bucky would ever love him or be there for him? Buck had given his whole self, his broken soul, only to be cast aside and destroyed again. Perhaps it was better that it happened now.
Buck Cleven ceased to exist. Why should he be kind and present when he was not valued? He cast aside the name Buck, a name given to him by the man he loved, and decided this was it.
No more touches, no idle chatter, no more loving glances, no more following and waiting to be acknowledged.
He would be Major Gale Cleven, performing his duties well, but he would no longer yearn for John Egan. It was over.
Like his father, John Egan had taken a piece of his soul, destroyed it for laughs, and handed it back.
Gale Cleven realized that there was no such thing as emotion, love, or peace—there was only living.
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thrashkink-coven · 2 days
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When I approached Ra I was apprehensive. I don’t like the idea of supremacy. I don’t jive with the concept of kingship, and my past relationship with Christianity has made me shy away from all things “Father God”. I like the freedom of choice and self discovery that I’ve found in entities like Lucifer.
But Ra is helping me heal, and in him I’m starting to find that the divine masculine isn’t so scary after all. I thought because of his nobility and position as a king, he would be harsh and picky, but he’s starting to help me understand what it really means to be a God of kings. It doesn’t mean being served and obeyed just because you should, it means being such a great and supportive leader that people want to follow you. And as a father, a good father, Ra never raises his voice at his children. He gives them the best advice because he wants them to succeed. I didn’t feel like I “owed” him respect. I just wanted to, I wanted to be around him and learn from him. I wanted to trust in his leadership and I wanted to make him proud. That’s very new for me. Having grown up without a father, I’ve never understood what that feels like.
Ra reminds me of the beauty and strength of powerful men. Men who protect and lead and encourage, men who nurture. Men who use their strength to create rather than destroy. Men who are honest and know how to love.
Ra is warm (of course) and incredibly, indescribably powerful, but also so soft. So gentle. And lively, cheerful. A smiling God. He doesn’t need to be stern and cold to summon those feelings of immense respect and honour of being in his presence. He laughs and he accepts offerings with such appreciation.
Today I gave him an offering of bread with some peanut butter and water. It’s the first one I’ve ever given. And I was overwhelmed with this feeling of him being pleasantly surprised by the peanut butter. As if he was saying “oh! Bread AND peanut butter! This is a treat!”
And something about that made me feel particularly softened. You’re the king of the Gods, the blazing burning Sun that gives all life to Earth, and yet you’re pleasantly surprised by a little peanut butter. Lol.
Today was the first time I called upon Ra for protection. I did a modified banishment of the Hexagram and called to him in his many faces, along with Horus cleanse my space and aura. I’ve never felt so confident in a protection ritual. The pure blazing energy of the sun sanitizes everything it touches. As I hummed each syllable of his holy names I felt him smiling on me. He seems to like singing and humming a lot. It was the first time I’ve ever felt right ending a prayer with “Amen”.
I could feel Mother Isis looking on us too, she seemed relieved that I’ve finally found them. Something about all this feels like coming home.
☀️
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elwenyere · 2 days
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What are some Cody-related headcanons you have? If you'd like to share 🙏
Hello Anon! Thank you so much for this wonderful ask. Cody is one of my favorite characters to write, and it's a joy to share some of the ideas and inventions that have come out of building stories for him.
I think one thing that's become crucial to the way I imagine Cody is that he's been thrust into this extremely high-responsibility, heavy-emotional-toll position at a super young age, and he's had to learn how to compartmentalize and repress pretty aggressively in order to keep doing his job. There are losses he just can't let himself fully acknowledge if he's going to remain functional (and he's very good at his job, so there will be more losses if he can't function), so I think of there being a distance - both deliberately cultivated and unconsciously formed - between what Cody's feeling and what he's saying, or even what he's thinking about consciously enough for it to surface in the narrative focalization.
That means that I see Cody as a character with an incredible strength of will and power of self-denial, but I also like to think about the small ways he might allow himself to blow off steam, and I imagine a lot of them would be sensory: extra spice in the food, a little flavored creamer in the caff, the ritual of smoking a cigarette, or of having sex - especially with someone with whom he's on the kind of footing that allows for eye rolling and shit-giving.
On that note, I also think of Cody as someone who derives satisfaction from solitude (which he hardly ever gets) and is maybe too good at bearing loneliness (which he gets more and more of as the war goes on). He has a fierce loyalty to his men, and he also has to order them to their deaths all the time. He understands that means he can't share the same kind of camaraderie with them that they share with each other. So he holds himself apart: someone many people respect, some resent, and few really know. But as isolated as that might make him feel, he's also got barely any time that he can truly call his own, so I imagine that maybe in a no-chip/Republic-wins AU he might decide to peace out for a while: go live by himself and do things that are low-stakes and build some habits that are totally his own.
I think he's so used to using anger - a kind of low-simmering, deeply saturating, furious indignation - as a substitute for fulfillment that he barely notices how much of his emotional apparatus is coated in frustration until he's struck by something that reopens the yearning - the curiosity and thirst and restlessness - that not even the brutal grind of being Marshal Commander of the Third Systems Army can crush out of him.
Also he's funny and he's sharp: that's important to me. Cody can absolutely read you for filth while sounding unremarkably polite, and you won't realize he's verbally shivved you until you're on the turbolift leaving the meeting.
Thank you again for this lovely ask, Anon!!! I hope this is close to what you had in mind by headcanon. <3<3<3
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weaveandwood · 3 days
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One-Shot: Midwinter in Waterdeep
Gale/Tav | Angst & Pining | Read on AO3
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Summary:
After the Netherbrain defeat, she thought her life with Gale was all wrapped up in a neat package with a beautiful bow. Life in the tower with its schedules, routine, and walls ended up not being for her. Over a year later, she finds herself on a job in the city again near the Midwinter Festival, searching faces in the crowd.
She found herself searching faces she passed on the street. None of them were him, of course, but did she want them to be? Had his schedule changed in these many months? She purchased a sweet roll at a food cart, her favorite one he had taken her to almost every tenday. Some things don’t change. She thought once that she could, that she could adapt to living in the city for him, for love, thinking adaptability was her strong point. She was mistaken.
AN: A quick one shot inspired by a song. I don't know if this is a sad AU standalone or if it will work its way into my main fic. I've had this idea rattling in my head for about a week. Nothing but angst and some pining.
She didn't know why she took a job in Waterdeep of all places. It was the one city she wanted to forget about in the entirety of the Sword Coast. Her memories of the place ran the gamut, from the highest, happiest bliss to the lowest, most soul-wrenching sadness. 
“Will you join me in Waterdeep as the newest member of the Dekarios clan?” He asked in the Elfsong Tavern, on one knee, more nervous than he needed to be. 
“This is my tower, welcome to your new home, future Mrs. Dekarios,” he said with a smile, crossing the threshold.  
“Is everything okay? You feel distant ever since Withers’s party, my love.” He had a sad look on his face, knowing the inevitable was coming. 
“Let’s cancel the wedding.” He entered his study, barely acknowledging her.  
She had left not long after that while he was teaching at Blackstaff Academy, a note on the entryway table for when he returned. The silver ring he had purchased for her upon their arrival in the city acting as a paperweight. 
I’m sorry. I can’t do this. 
That was over a year ago. Now, she found herself back in the city after signing a contract for what turned out to be a relatively easy job for some quick gold. Desperate times, desperate measures. Turns out being the “Hero of Baldur’s Gate” didn’t go far outside of Baldur’s Gate. Her contract paid for one more night of lodging, so she went on a stroll from her inn down the main street toward the docks. 
Dangerous. Tempting. Stupid. 
She found herself searching faces she passed on the street. None of them were him, of course, but did she want them to be? Had his schedule changed in these many months? She purchased a sweet roll at a food cart, her favorite one he had taken her to almost every tenday. Some things don’t change. She thought once that she could, that she could learn to love living in the city for him, for love, thinking adaptability was her strong point. She was mistaken.
She pulled her thin wool coat tighter around her as she kept walking toward the waterfront. Waterdeep was cold this close to Midwinter. Snow was starting to flurry, people were hurrying around with packages. She turned the corner onto a street lined with large houses, his tower near the very end. 
Dangerous. Tempting. Stupid. 
She looked in windows as she walked by, illuminated with the golden light of candles as families and friends got together for celebrations. If she had never left, would she be at one of these parties, laughing as Gale’s arm draped over her shoulders? Would he be regaling everyone with tales of their grand adventure, or of something an apprentice had done at Blackstaff Academy? Would he finish the story by kissing her hand or cheek, as he loved to do in public? 
Had he found someone else? Moved on? A new future Mrs. Dekarios in the tower, one who is best friends with Tara and Morena, slotting into their life with ease and grace, much better than she ever had a hope to? Is he better off not knowing her anymore? 
She didn’t let her thoughts wander to him often, if at all. Tears threatened to form in her eyes - from the memories or the wind she could not say for sure, but she’d blame the wind anyway. The sun was starting to go down, and her inn was in the center of the city. She could handle herself when it came to physical threats, but the cold was getting more and more biting without the sun to lessen its sting. Just a couple more, then I’ll turn around, she thought. The houses down here were so pretty with their decorations. She smiled to herself halfheartedly. This could have been her life. 
She could hear the celebrations from the house two doors down. That would be the one she turned around at, she decided, wanting to attend their celebration from the outside, if only for a moment. She looked in the window from across the street. The front room was indeed full of people, each with drink in hand, laughing and cheering for someone. She laughed to herself as she saw the illusion of fireworks inside the room, setting the room alight with sparkling magic fit for a midwinter celebration. She missed magic. She saw the crowd part, presumably for the subject of the cheers. 
Her eyes widened. Her breathing quickened.
His hair was longer, a little more grey at the temples. He still tied it up halfway. He still had his beard. The creases by his eyes were a little deeper. 
He was looking right at her, frozen, his brown eyes just as wide as hers. 
She turned quickly to make a hasty escape. She knew it was tempting the gods to come down this street, but hadn’t that been the point? Hadn’t she become addicted to the if only during her time in the city?
“Stop!” she heard his voice behind her. She got three houses down before she felt a hand grab hers, stopping her in her tracks. “Wait. Please,” he said, panting.  
Dangerous. Tempting. Stupid. 
She turned around.
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nicksbestie · 2 days
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Kittens (part two) - M. Sturniolo
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READ PART ONE FIRST!! YOU CAN READ IT HERE!
Summary : One specific person becomes a regular at the animal shelter you work at, always visiting the cats <3
Warnings : mentions of anxiety but nothing graphic!
Word Count : 1146
Pairing : Matt Sturniolo/Reader
A/N : part two!! this won't become a series but i felt it deserved a little more!! it's written in a later time, a epilogue scene, if you will!
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The cats being in a different room that day had been one of the best things to ever happen to you.
You hadn’t known it at the time, but that conversation with Matt, starting by leading him to a separate room, had blossomed into a relationship. Matt had started coming back every day, coming up with stupid reasons to talk to you, claiming he needed help finding a cat that had run away, only for the cat to walk right out from under the tower when Matt walked back in, but you let him do it every time. You felt like you couldn’t resist the opportunity to spend time with him, and if you weren’t busy, why should you?
He spent hours there every day, which made you wonder what he did for work, because how could he afford to not be at his job? After a couple of days where he came in one after another, you finally asked. It felt like a fair question because he clearly knew where you worked, so it was an eye for an eye, or something like that. He told you he did content creation with his brothers, and you looked him up later that evening, eyes nearly popping out of your head when you noticed just how famous they were. You weren’t someone who lived in the dark, but you didn’t keep up with every new thing going on, so there were a ton of famous people you didn’t know about. 
You weren’t going to lie, you stalked him that night. One thing hit you like a truck when you noticed it, though. Matt had told you that he came into the shelter when his anxiety was getting bad, and he had been coming in every Wednesday and Friday per week, and as you scrolled through their shared YouTube, you noticed that’s when videos were posted. You wondered how much he enjoyed his job, or if he did it because it made good money, or if the posting just really got to him because he worried about what people would think. Later you would ask, and you would learn that the latter was the reason, and that he really did love his job, it just got to him sometimes, knowing that so many people would pick apart everything he had done or said in a video. 
After about two weeks of him coming back to the shelter every single day, talking to you whenever he could, he finally asked for your number. He waited until you were off of the clock, making sure that he could never be accused of being unprofessional by anyone. He waited until the shelter closed, like normal, and you thought he had left, but he waited until you both stepped outside, and the door was locked, and then he asked. You let him have it with no complaints, and he texted you for the first time as soon as he got home, asking if you had also made it home safe. You responded much quicker than you would like to admit, letting him know you were home and safe. 
He would text you before he would come into the shelter, letting you know that he was on the way, and you two became incredibly close. Hanging out outside of work, spending time while he was at the shelter, if you were in the same vicinity, you were practically attached at the hip. You met his brothers, and they were so different from him that it was refreshing. You loved how they all got along so well, and even their banter in videos wasn’t coming from a true point of anger, but all lighthearted. You watched every video as they got posted, and sometimes all four of you hung out together before or after filming. You loved being in their company, and you had found a wonderful friend in Matt, but you had no idea that it would eventually become more than that. 
You’d hung out so much on your own, you knew you two worked together, you both knew that the other was attractive, you both knew that you liked the other. But you had no idea that it would eventually end up working out. Nick and Chris knew as well, being able to see it in the way that you interacted with each other. They kept it to themselves, allowing you two to navigate the developments of your relationship with each other by yourselves, but both of them were hoping that you would just get your head out of your ass already and get together. Matt was the first one to say anything. 
You knew he found love gestures sweet, you’d seen that in a video, and you’d seen it in the way that he interacted with people he loved platonically, being a gift giver, but when he showed up at your door with flowers, you were still in shock. He’d stayed the night that evening, soaking in the fact that the person he felt so strongly for had the same feelings for him. It had only snowballed in the best possible way from there. You did everything together, you went everywhere together, and sometimes that could cause codependency problems, but you were lucky to not have to deal with that. You were used to him leaving for a couple of hours to film, but he always came back as quickly as possible. 
It was refreshing for Matt to fall in love with someone who didn’t love him for the numbers, for the following, for the money, for the fame. This was someone who saw him off guard, who actually loved him for the person he was off of the camera, for all of the good in him and all of the bad. He wasn’t sure that he would ever find someone like this due to his popularity across the Internet, but he never took you for granted, not for a single moment. And those were the words that spilled out from between his lips, when he was knelt in front of you, ring box in hand, just three amazing years later, and the same ones that he would repeat at the altar six months after that. 
You didn’t work at the animal shelter anymore, but you and Matt were regular visitors and volunteers. Some of the people that you used to work with were still there, and shortly after you were wed, you picked out a kitten together, from the same Cat Cottages that Matt used to sit in for hours every week. Glancing over at the man you’d fallen in love with, sitting on the couch with the now one year old black cat in his lap, you knew that had been the best job you would ever work, and it brought you something much more rewarding than the money.
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blueinkjpeg · 2 days
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Listen to me ramble about traveler ships bc they’re silly!!
Albedo
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Both Albedo and the Traveler have a scientific curiosity about the world and how it works. They’re also curious about humans. While Traveler finds enjoyment out of living among them, Albedo prefers studying them from a distance.
This also transcends into curiosity about each other, since they’re both different kinds of immortal ageless entities, they intrigue each other. (Albedo talks about wanting to “study” the Traveler.) They feel a sort of kinship for each other, as they’re both not really of Teyvat. Because of this, Albedo only trusts the Traveler to stop him if he should lose control one day and destroy Mondstat. He also talks about trusting the Traveler around his experiments, and having faith in their “exceptional talents.”
About us, Assistant: Would you oblige me by serving as my assistant? After observing so many experiments, you surely know a good deal about alchemy by now. Relax, we will work together. I don't think you will have any problems. I have faith in my ability to instruct you, and even more faith in your exceptional talents.
Ascension 2: Albedo is the step in which change begins. Clearing away the excess so we can take on all the knowledge that is available. Would you like to investigate this world with me?
Ascension 3: Rubedo in alchemy refers to the refining of feeling. I feel the refining of my own emotions is also thanks to you.
Is there anything else you're interested in?
Albedo: Hmm, anything else...?
Albedo: Probably you.
Albedo: At first, it was because you carry the aura of the stars.
Albedo: But now... it seems that there is more to it.
Albedo: Why is this? Give me some time and I can conduct experiments to find out.
Is there anything you'd like to do?
Albedo: Heh, where should I begin...?
Albedo: In your company, I never lack inspiration.
For drawing?
For experiments?
Albedo: It's good for both drawing and experiments.
Albedo: And not just for these, but for many other things.
Albedo: Speaking of which... I used to think interaction with others was a waste of time.
Albedo: But after meeting you, I'd rather spend my time on you than other matters.
Albedo: This is a unique anomaly. I think I likely know the reason why.
Albedo: So can you also... give me more of your time?
Xiao
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Xiao has been cursed with bad karma, while the Traveler has purifying abilities. Xiao talks about how being around them makes him calmer somehow. Maybe because of these purifying abilities, more likely because the Traveler is so universally warm and friendly. Two immortal beings, Xiao has spent his long life tied to his nation while the Traveler has been almost everywhere.
While Xiao has a rough exterior, he is actually curious about humanity and has a great love for them, something Traveler understands and shares. He’s just weary of his karmic debt and history of violence bringing the Liyuan people bad luck, or preventing him from fitting in should be mingle among them. The Traveler likewise does not fit in, but is still beloved. And so, Xiao has expressed that he would be willing to attempt going to Liyue Harbor to learn about the people if the Traveler accompanied him. It’s likely Xiao admires Traveler for their pursuit of understanding Teyvat and its people— something Xiao is naturally bad at— and they make him feel comfortable to pursue it as well.
Xiao has sworn to come whenever the Traveler calls his name. He seems notably protective of Traveler, more so than other characters, maybe feeling a kinship for both being so inhuman. Either way, voice lines imply he is guarded because he assumes his karma will poison Traveler, and he doesn’t want to hurt them. Despite this guarded roughness, Traveler rightly characterized him as a deeply caring individual, seeing Xiao to the core of who he is, and treats him as such.
Also, Traveler has shown to be dedicated to becoming someone Xiao can trust and relax around. In some of Xiao’s voice lines, it’s implied that Traveler has been trying to come up with ways to help soothe Xiao’s pain.
They have a tradition of releasing Xiao Lanterns during Lanturn Rite. Xiao has given the Traveler crystalflies for their hair for his own birthday, and has talked about how since knowing the Traveler, Xiao has been blessed with sweet peaceful dreams of the two of them going on strolls, wondering if he deserves something so nice.
In a poetry event, the Traveler has created poetry to show their admiration towards Xiao for his endless watch over Liyue. Maybe Traveler admires it because they’ve never had such devotion over something for so long, and Xiao admires Traveler for the opposite reason, and for being brave.
About Shenhe: It seems Shenhe places a great deal of trust in you. Well, how could she not. There are few people in the world as kind and good-natured as you.
More about Xiao V: It's too late. The connection between us is too strong. Even if you wanted to, it's too late to sever it. Hm? You've never thought to sever it? *sigh* This eternal dance of demon subjugation... My fight goes on. But I would like to know more about you.
Ascension: Countless souls have fallen prey to these hands. I too have been swallowed by the darkness — and yet you dare to drive me on. You may think of me as... your companion. You seek to find me salvation? ...You... really are a difficult being to comprehend.
Xiao: ...I don't know if it's related to you, but recently, the pain from my karmic debt has been less excruciating.
Xiao: It's much easier to bear than before.
Xiao: If you have free time, we can go to Liyue Harbor together...
Xiao: If not... never mind.
Of course we can.
Xiao: Uh... alright.
Finally decided to integrate into city life?
Xiao: Ahem...
Xiao: I have no intention of getting close to the lives of mortals.
Xiao: But I know that you often enter and leave the city, walking amidst the crowd.
Xiao: The stories of these times, or their joys... If I don't experience such things myself, it'll be hard to understand your thoughts.
So... you're doing this for me?
Xiao: Yes, to understand you.
Xiao: I had a feeling that it would be difficult, but after having such thoughts, I can't simply sit back and do nothing.
Xiao: I will control myself while I am in the city.
Xiao: I'll try to speak... as little as possible.
I'll be with you.
You can say whatever you want. I'll bail you out.
Xiao: Hmm...
Xiao: Let me know when you're ready to go.
Ayaka
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Ayaka’s character story 5: “Ayaka is still waiting for a friend to emerge who can walk alongside her on equal footing and stand by her side. That person cannot see her as a member of the Yashiro Commission, or as the Shirasagi Himegimi, nor will their conduct towards her be bound by decorum or status. And if possible, they might also be well-versed in a great many fields of study, and have witnessed all manner of interesting things... and perhaps they might even be able to tell her a story in a pinch. Only such a person might become Ayaka's bosom friend.”
The Traveler is Ayaka’s ideal companion, the exact kind of person she has been waiting for, possibly the only person who truly has the ability to understand her outside of Inazuman society’s perception of her. She finds Traveler interesting and exciting, a stark difference from her everyday life.
When they first met, the Traveler was disillusioned in their travels after briefly reuniting with their sibling, who dismissed them. Ayaka makes the effort to show them and remind them why they began their travels in the first place; the world and humanity is complex and interesting and beautiful, and it’s a worthwhile endeavor to understand and protect them. Ayaka regularly reminds the Traveler of this by being complex and interesting and beautiful herself. Traveler then goes to great lengths to protect Ayaka’s people, because they understand why they’re important to her.
Ayaka is trapped in Inazuma, while the Traveler has been all over the world. Things that Ayaka has seen a million times are new and wonderful to the Traveler, showing these things in a new light to Ayaka. It makes Ayaka feel like a “regular girl,” something she wishes she could be more often. The Traveler is shown to feel most comfortable with Ayaka and her family while in Inazuma. They both understand what it’s like to feel distant from a sibling.
Good Morning: Oh, good morning, Traveler. ...Whenever I see you in the morning, somehow, it makes me feel like... today is going to be a good day.
Aspiration: Today, as in the past, I aspire to be somebody whom everyone can trust. But what motivates me is no longer the responsibilities I shoulder, or the expectations of other people. Rather, it is the fact that you are this kind of person, too.
More about Kamisato Ayaka V: […] unless I am mistaken, I trust that you will not take issue with this slight departure from convention on my part… That is to say... I'm a little tired, may I rest my head on your shoulder? Just for a moment.
Desires: […] But even so, shouldn't I still follow my dreams? Shouldn't I... share my true feelings with you?
Ascension: Our time together has been so pleasant that I am fearful of losing what I have gained. I'm sorry, I must compose myself.
Kamisato Ayaka: At least, that's a romantic way of approaching this topic [poetry].
I feel the same way.
Kamisato Ayaka: More importantly... I hope that, between the two of us, we need not be concerned with our identities...
Kamisato Ayaka: I'll just think of you as... my closest confidant.
Kamisato Ayaka: Being able to enjoy tea with my closest confidant — it feels like I'm in a dream...
(Closest confidant...)
Kamisato Ayaka: ...
Kamisato Ayaka: Can I... Hold your hand?
Wanderer
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The Traveler and the Wanderer are both parallels and ideological foils. They have both been betrayed and abandoned by family and loved ones, doomed to travel and wander the world in order to understand it better because of that.
But the Wanderer has learned humanity’s cruelty during these travels, mostly in the Fatui. He believes humans to be cruel and self-serving, and so he acts that way too. And as an immortal, doesn’t understand the importance of a limited life, clutching onto his grief and anger in a means to cope with what he cannot control.
Meanwhile, the Traveler has learned the beauty of humanity during their travels. They believe in the inherent goodness in everyone, and so they act that way. Curious and sensitive, like Wanderer before his three betrayals, even though Traveler has arguably been through just as much hardship as Wanderer (which may be a reason Wanderer held contempt for Traveler in the past). This belief is what led them to not kill the Wanderer when they defeated him in battle.
Their ideologies are in direct conflict. The Traveler’s ideology has led them to getting hurt often, while the Wanderer’s ideology has led him to being isolated. They have a lot to learn from one another.
AND, with the Wanderer having erased himself from everyone’s memory except the Traveler, the Traveler now is the only person to know the real Wanderer. They know all the evil Wanderer has done, (led to the death of Teppi which Traveler was famously angry about, tried to kill Nahida, etc) and is still his friend. Wanderer is perplexed by this, often expressing it in voicelines. But this means Traveler knows him the most, they own part of his identity as well, as Wander has allowed them to give him a new name. A new name that he has not let anyone use except the Traveler, preferring to go by “Hat Guy” in the Akademia.
While still being weary of him, the Traveler can’t help but seek Wanderer’s presence because they enjoy learning about his vastly differing perspectives on life. The Wanderer respects them because of their vast strength and knowledge.
About us, Rivals: So, you're still stewing over our run-ins from before? Huh. Well, what are you going to do about it? Take your time. I'm in no hurry.
(“Oooo you wanna kiss me so bad ooooo I’m in your head”)
About us, Collaborators: I'll never be one of the good guys. I'm just here to pay my dues after what you've done for me. But what about you? Shouldn't you come up with some excuse for our meetings? If one of your friends mistakes you for collaborating with the enemy, you're on your own.
(He makes the same excuses to be around Nahida, though his lore explains he does truly admire her. Just saying.)
About Damselette: Let me ask: what should you do if you were to encounter a "damsel" who is oblivious and innocent at any given time, and unconcerned and unfeeling in any given situation? If it were me, I could at least challenge her to a fight. But if it were you... with your conscience, I would stay away from her.
(He’s calling Traveler kind-hearted, calling out their optimistic ideology, and warding them away from danger with his more grounded/pessimistic ideology.)
Birthday: Give me your hand. Heh, there's no need to be nervous. I'm just taking you to a vantage point. How is it? The scenery here should be quite breathtaking. There's no need to thank me — I see little point in it.
(Wanderer): Thank you for trying to look out for me. Go get some rest.
Jeht
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Through the Golden Slumber world quest, it’s made very clear that the NPC Jeht is significantly [romantically] closer to the female Traveler Lumine. In the quest, they travel together for a time and become close. In a moment of crisis involving the Fatui, Jeht is ordered to kill Lumine, but refuses out of affection for her. She takes the punishment instead, and is offered to a Fatui scientist for experiments by her tribe. Jeht was told it was Lumine that betrayed her, and Lumine was told Jeht had betrayed the tribe, but neither of them chose to believe something bad about the other.
At the end of it all, Jeht chooses to fight by Lumine’s side over her other friends. Inspired by Lumine, Jeht decides to go on her own journey. Their goodbye is tearful.
Lyney
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Lyney has only known the Traveler for a short time, but they already have a checkered history. The Traveler trusts Lyney and his sister immediately after meeting them, hangs out with him for a few days, and defends him in murder trial. Only for it to be revealed Lyney was part of the Fatui, who the Traveler has an even worse history with, having killed their friends and put Traveler and their companions in mortal peril many times.
Lyney offers an apology and some of the truth, but the Traveler is still cold with him and brushes him off, believing themselves to be betrayed (and likely influenced by mixed feelings of seeing such close twins). Despite openly admitting to having difficulty with opening up, Lyney makes the effort to be open and truthful with the Traveler during his story quest, rebuilding trust between them. Lyney puts in extra effort to be honest, because he truly wants the Traveler to like him. He gives the Traveler a rainbow rose by the end of it, which even his sister marks as odd, because it represents passion and romantic love in Fontaine. His sister asks the Traveler to “protect that flower for her,” likely alluding to Lyney.
The Traveler trusts him after this enough to include him in the main quest again. Lyney remarks multiple times about how he feels close with the Traveler, how he enjoys talking with them, how the Traveler’s eyes shine like topaz and Lyney could never lie to such beauty.
In Arlecchino's story quest, he’s implied to have talked in detail about the Traveler to his other siblings, and is eager for the Traveler to like them. He is hesitant to involve the Traveler in family business, wanting to keep them safe and saying he will protect the Traveler with his life. The Traveler similarly shows the desire to protect Lyney, stepping in between him and his Father during conflict.
They resonate with one another concerning their twin siblings. Lyney having almost lost Lynette, and the Traveler being separated from their sibling. For the Traveler, this grew from jealousy to admiration, as they see Lyney caring so greatly for his family, a trait Traveler shares. Traveler understands and respects Lynsey’s loyalty to his (fatui) family, and would not be surprised if and when that loyalty drives them apart.
While they are close now after much effort rebuilding trust, they are both silently aware their friendship has an expiration date. Traveler’s goals contradict the Fatui. And with Lyney declaring his loyalty to the Knave as her successor, and this mysterious Fatui scheme the House of the Hearth have been roped into, they both know it’s just a matter of time before circumstance sees them on opposing sides of the battlefield. Though it remains unaddressed for now as they try to enjoy the time they have left together.
Hello: […] Well... Hmm, your eyes are like topaz, precious, pure, and lovely. I like them!
When it snows: Achoo! Phew... I've heard some say that when you sneeze, it means that someone's thinking about you. Is it Lynette, I wonder? Or... is it you?
Good Morning: C'mon, just five more minutes... Huh? Oh! It's you! I thought it was the radiance of the sunlight on my skin that I felt — turns out it was your radiance all along!
About Lyney, sweet talker: I should probably emphasize again that I'm rarely so open with anyone — I guess it's because you're not just anyone.
More about Lyney I: It seems we're both keenly interested in each other. Well, know that the honor is mine! Haha, relax. I couldn't ever tell lies to your mesmerizing eyes — not even if I tried!
More about Lyney V: […] Sometimes I think people would feel sorry for the real me. Do you? *sigh* Or do you find my little games absurd?
(Awwe he cares about what Traveler thinks.)
Ascension: Doing all this for me... Are you trying to steal this magician's heart, by any chance? Well, in that case, congratulations, my dear apprentice — or should I say, "companion." For you have succeeded!
Lyney: It's almost impossible for me to lie to your face... Maybe it's because I can't bear to see that hurt expression of yours.
Lyney: Say, why don’t you look at my hat? Do you see anything different about it?
Huh... Don't think there's any difference.
Lyney: Ah, but that just means you need to look at it more carefully! Just come a bit closer.
Well, alright then.
Lyney: […] No, the whole thing was misdirection.
Lyney: I just played a little trick, and stole something of yours. And after that, I also slipped a card into your bag.
Lyney: Now, can you guess what I stole from you?
My heart?
Lyney: A most unexpected answer! I have to say, even my heart has begun to race too.
Lyney: What I actually stole, however, was your "attention." Even though it's not nearly as valuable as your heart, it's still very important to us magicians nonetheless!
My... attention?
Lyney: Bingo! Congratulations, that was the right answer.
Lyney: […] Anyway, I just want to find a warm, free, and peaceful home for all of my animal assistants.
Lyney: A place where they'll always enjoy care and being lovingly looked after, with no need to worry about food or shelter...
Lyney: To be perfectly honest with you, this [Traveler’s teapot home] is by far the best choice for them that I know of... but I wouldn't want you to feel pressured to take them in, or to persuade you using honeyed words.
Lyney: Good morning, (Traveler)!
Lyney: It would be great if I could see you every morning.
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ash-says · 1 day
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Handling curiosity so the cat doesn't get killed:
We all have been there at least once in our life where we allowed the curiosity to get the best of us and instantly regretted the decision. Being extremely mercurial in nature it comes naturally to me. To be curious on the continuous lookout to find something that will stimulate my brain or make it go crazy obsessive.
That's how I learned the harsh way that being a curious cat might sound cute but it can cost you your life or sanity. One of my dearest friends once said something along these lines,"Some truths are better left unknown. Truth and knowledge can turn into poison when consumed carelessly."
The reason why I am talking about this is because I hardly find people discussing it.
Yet mythology has so many great examples, Pandora opening the box, Eve eating the apple it wasn't just temptation it was also laced with curiosity of what might happen?
I am listing out a few things that you should avoid pursuing under sheer curiosity to save the poor cat in you:
1) A street fight. Two people are fighting. Let them. It's not your job to be the mediator and it's irrelevant to find the reason. Until and unless there's no aggression involved mind your own damn business.
2) Spiritual stuff especially dark ones. I believe energy is both light and dark in nature if you don't know the way to alchemize it better stay away.
3) Attempting things without any prior knowledge. Especially speaking about dangerous stuff here. If you love your life better do it under professional supervision.
4) Your partner's/crush feelings towards you. Girl if he likes you. You will know. Trust me. Been there. Done that. Constant microanalysis. It's tiring. Let him be.
5) Others life. Stalking and obsessing over how a particular person is living their day to day life is literally embarrassing. Get a life, Sushma!
6) Know the red zones in a conversation. If meeting in a professional setting try to avoid personal questions. Learn to sense a person's discomfort and never push someone to answer your questions that have literally nothing to do with you.
7) Celebrities personal life. Another waste of time.
8) Do not show your curiosity for sexual acts, things,etc in front of a man. It's the easiest way to put yourself in danger. You are the target babe. Congrats!!
9) When someone tells you knowing the truth will hurt you. Let it be a secret. Don't persuade that person to tell the truth. I strongly believe when you don't control the situation the truth automatically finds its way to you (conditions applied).
10) About the stuff people say behind your back. A full proof route towards people pleasing, anxiety, self doubt etc. Don't go out of your way searching for what's cooking. The cake might turn out to be burnt. Who knows.
That's all for today's show on ash-says. Stay tuned for more illegal tricks and explosive opinions.
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horrormurderkill · 2 days
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Love at its finest
Warnings: Blood, description of a nasty animal death, self-harm (reader does not indulge!), the fic talks about killing a living being, and possibly more.
Crimson red blood and annoyingly wet dirt coats the entirety of its body, the smushed colors a vast contrast to the ones around. Holding its tiny head, you gaze at it in distaste, hands trembling at the thought of snapping the short neck. That was the sick rule in which, people should still remember it, even though it was assumed to be over.
It all started with many townspeople's concern that possibly, an incubus or succubus like demons were roaming the lands, the intense sexual libido making all living beings go mad. Speculations of a powerful demon cursing the town, for some reason. Gradually, it is said that some animals were birthing actual demon and animal hybrids. The shock even reached the town mayor, a church leader, who demanded everyone to behead or snap its neck and burn the sinful creature. But this is a tale from centuries ago. Younger children thought it was fake, thought it was a tale made from old people, for the purpose of them attending to their plants and animals correctly.
Nevertheless, the being in your nimble hands were enough proof. Your hands let go of the hybrid, onto the ground, as tears started to uncontrollably flow from your eyes. After all, you are only a child. Experiencing your beloved pet dog act strangely for a long time, then after chasing your dog into the woods only to find her tearing her own flesh as the hybrid inside completely messed with your dog's mind. You are allowed to cry after such experience, you're an innocent child, after all.
You wipe your tears away, pulling out a large napkin and rolling the creature like a burrito with it, you put it back into your backpack. It's the last remaining and breathing thing from your loving dog, at least. Pulling yourself on your feet, you hurriedly speed-walk out the forest to your home.
Aunt Laurine is going to be worried for you.
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A loud bang from the farmhouse makes you jump from your seat. The sound of barking followed after, as you look up the window where the loud noises are coming from. Soon after, a head pops out from the window, your companion. His sharp teeth holds a rat in between, yet his excitement in his eyes and smile is what drives your attention away from the unpleasant sight. Domino, he's the only reason you still stay in the town, albeit slightly farther away from others. If it weren't for his unwanted birth 20 years ago, you would've left the town already. Though, you were scared of him growing up, you learned to adapt to his attitude and actions.
"[Name]! When are you unlocking the doors?! If you don't unlock it right now, I promise you I'll jump out from this window!" He yelled, making you sigh from exhaustion as you unlock the door. As soon as you open it, he hops into your arms, giggling happily your arms are strong enough to hold him. "Alright, let's head back." You pat his back, signaling him to get off of you, but of course, he didn't budge. Instead, his long tail wrapped around one of your thigh. It's evident he is asking you to be in bed with you, but you knew better.
His attitude had the fragments from all of the infamous 7 deadly sins, it keeps on switching and changing, like a domino effect. Right now is Lust. You make Domino get in a comfortable position on your entire torso, as you walk back to the house to rest. Adventure to the entrance was surprisingly not a big deal. Usually, he would whine and complain but he uttered nothing the whole walk. It made you quite suspicious, though.
Walking in his room, you dropped him off on his bed, yet his tail didn't unwrap around your thigh. As it was your last choice, you lean in, "If you let me go, I'll give you a goodnight kiss." He looked back at you and he replies, "And a French kiss." A demand. Damn it. Now you regret ever teaching him what a French kiss is just because he asked what it was after he saw it from a movie.
Never mind that. At least, both of you are hopefully safe in this lifetime, then it doesn't matter if you gave your first kiss and virginity to this demon.
-----
This piece of idea is inspired by a book called "Incubus" by Ann Arensberg
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nightwolf14292 · 3 days
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Jason Todd Canon Lore Stuff:
@jashjdh Ask and you shall receive! :D this is sort of part 2 to this post of mine, where I did the same thing for Dick Grayson. Here, since there are so many comics and so much conflicting lore, I read the fandom . com entry for the character and then type out the most important bits of what I learned, both to help myself remember it, and to teach others ^w^
!TW for Batman-like things, such as spoilers, mentions of injury and death, a brief mentions of drug use, a brief mention of sewerslide and r(😬)e, etc)!
•To begin with, a lot of people argue "Jason is the angry Robin!" Or, "Jason ISN'T the angry Robin!" I think for the most part, this misunderstanding happens because originally, Jason was a very calm kid. In his original appearances he had a similar backstory to Dick Grayson(Being an acrobat in the circus) and was much more chill, however in the post-crisis revamp, he became more violent and troubled. In the words of the wiki, "the post-Crisis Jason is impulsive, reckless, and full of rage."
•Jason lived a troubled childhood, with his father being a petty crook. His dad at one point served a jail sentence for his crimes, but even once he got out of jail, he never came back to the family. This left Jason alone, taking care of his drug-addicted mother. He would rip and remove the parts from cars around the city, selling them for cash to make sure they were fed and clothed. His mother eventually died from an overdose so he took to the streets, continuing to take apart cars for cash.
•One night he came upon the Batmobile parked in an alleyway. Batman had just replaced the tires, but had not yet put on his new custom hubcaps. Jason took this opportunity to snag the tires, and managed to get one and out of there before he came back for a second tire. This is when Batman caught him, hence the iconic interaction of him throwing his tire iron at Bruce and calling him a 'big boob' as he ran away.
•Batman tried putting Jason in a boarding school for troubled kids, however this didn't work out either because the owner of the school was actually running a program to train young criminals. When Batman busted the criminal operation, he decided that perhaps Jason's anger could be used for crime fighting, so he took him in because he was worried that if he didn't, Jason would become a criminal. While Jason wasn't an acrobat like Dick, he was strong, and had lots of skills from his time on the streets.
•On their first official mission together, though, it was revealed that Two-Face had killed Jason's father. Despite the fact that Jason's father had abandoned him, he was still enraged by this and he went on a rampage. However, he showed restraint when he allowed Two-Face to be arrested instead of killing him, which made Bruce very proud.
•As much as Jason was a good, enthusiastic student, he was also a very troubled one. His time on the streets had raised him with a tilted sense of morals, and with the tendency to lash out and get violent when threatened because of his street survival instincts. Because of this, Jason often had the opposite ideals and morals to his mentor. He tended to use excessive force when trying to stop criminals, such as how in one adventure he was asked to 'hold off' some villains, and he immediately shot at them despite Bruce's dislike of using guns.
•The most notable of these times was on the case of Felipe Garzonasa, a man who had r(😬)ed a woman, an event that led to her sewerslide. Jason tracked this guy down, and moments after Jason arrived, Felipe fell to his death off of his apartment balcony. While it was never confirmed nor denied, it's fairly possible that Jason pushed Garzonasa off, breaking Batman's no kill rule. (We love a man who respects women ✊)
•Bruce was so afraid that Jason was going to possibly kill someone, either intentionally or with his reckless actions, that he called Barbara Gordon and asked her to work a case with Jason, in an attempt to figure him out. They did work together, however Barbara could come up with no real way to help him, and simply warned Bruce that there was 'a darkness in Jason'.
•Jason eventually discovers that his mother was not actually his biological mother, so he runs away from home on a mission to find his real mom. He follows lots of leads, but eventually ends up in Ethiopia, finding his bio mother Sheila, working as an aid worker. He's incredibly happy to be reunited with his real mom, but he soon discovers that Sheila is being blackmailed by the Joker, being forced to supply him with medical treatment. Sheila herself has been embezzling funds from the agency, and to keep from getting caught, she directly hands Jason over to the Joker who brutally beats him with a crowbar and leaves him and Sheila in a warehouse with a bomb. Batman is unable to save them on time, and both of them perish in the explosion. Bruce is obviously devastated (and starts going crazy because of this a bit later on), and the bodies are both buried in Gotham City with the cause of death on Jason's death certificate being labeled 'smoke inhalation'.
•Jason is dead for at least a decade, his memory constantly haunting Bruce as his 'greatest failure', keeping Jason's Robin suit on display in the Batcave. Bruce begins to spiral over the thoughts that he himself had failed to train Jason properly, and that he had also failed to save Jason from the Joker. (Personal opinion, I don't know if I actually blame Bruce for 'Not saving Jason in time'? Because the way the wiki framed it, it made it seem like Jason ran away and didn't tell anyone that he was going to do this, plus I don't know how Bruce would've known that the Joker was blackmailing Sheila to begin with? Idk, maybe I'm missing some context here)
•Many years later, while Bruce is fighting with Hush, Tim gets kidnapped. When he confront the kidnapped it ends up being 'Jason', but it turns out that this version of Jason isn't Jason at all, and is just Clayface pretending to be Jason.
•Superboy-Prime, trapped in the Paradise Dimension, alters reality. This shift results in Jason's revival, as he's once again given life. He breaks his way out of his own coffin with his bare hands, and drags himself 12 miles before eventually collapsing (since he still has many lasting injuries from the Joker's beating). He's found at some point and hospitalized, where he stays in a coma for a full year, and even when he awakens he has amnesia. At some point he's recognized by a petty criminal, who informs Talia. Talia brings him to the Lazarus Pit, where she immerses him in the water where her father Ra's is also bathing. This restores Jason's memories and his physical health, however it's implied that the Pit's energy + Ah-Gul's energy messed with his mind and personality (Though it's always possible that these changes really just came from his trauma)
•Jason Todd takes up the mantle of Red Hood, and returns to Gotham City.
•Jason goes to find the Joker (who had been run out of town by Hush), and gives him a beating with a crowbar just as the Joker did to him, though he keeps the Joker alive to use him against Batman later on. He also assumes the control of several gangs, and starts a mini war against the Black Mask criminal empire. His general plan is to clean up the cities violence and drug dealings(probably because he doesn't want anyone to end up like his non-bio mother), as well as kill the Joker for revenge. Because of his intense and violent methods, he has many brushes with Batman. It's around this time that Bruce finds a Robin mask in the Batmobile, one that never belonged to Dick or Tim, but looked like a mask in the style of Jason's old Robin costume. He also realized at this time that Jason's coffin is empty, and that's when he starts to believe that Jason may have genuinely come back from the dead.
•Jason, hearing that Tim had replaced him and was supposedly a 'better Robin' then him, he got angry and broke into the Titan tower to confront him. Wearing a newer version of his own Robin costume, Jason makes quick work of immobilizing the other Titans. He was absolutely furious that there was no memorial for him in the Hall of Fallen Titans (Despite the fact that he was only a Titan for a very short time), Jason demands Tim tell him if he was really as good of a Robin as Jason himself was, and Tim stubbornly says 'Yes' before he passes out. As Jason is leaving the tower, he rips the 'R' logo from Tim's costume. However, it's revealed in the epilogue of that comic that Jason actually holds some respect for Tim now, begrudgingly saying an "I'll admit. He's good." As he ponders how he could've been a better Robin had he acted more like Tim.
•At some point Jason kidnaps the Joker and uses him to lure Bruce to Crime Alley, where they had first met all those years ago. Jason is of course angry that Bruce never 'properly avenged' him by killing the Joker, since Jason believed that Bruce would because the Joker had "Taken me away from you". Bruce explains that it would've been easy for him to kill the Joker, that he continuously fantasized about taking the Joker away, torturing him and eventually killing him, but that he wasn't willing to cross that line (Partially because he wasn't willing to stain the memories he had of Jason [that he clung so tightly to while losing his sanity] with blood). Jason decides on a deal. Either Bruce kills him, or he will kill the Joker. So he holds one gun to the Joker's head and gives the other to Bruce, counting to three. However Bruce, obviously not wanting to kill Jason but also not wanting Jason to commit this crime, uses a Batarang to cut down an object that ends up slicing Jason's throat. The Joker uses this time to detonate some explosives and plunge both of them into the waters. (I don't even know what to say about this part, I have a lot of opinions here. I will say though, I think that if Tim hadn't become Robin, Bruce might've legitimately killed the Joker.)
•Jason shows up again after about a year, now as an evil version of Nightwing. Jason uses this costume to taunt Dick, suggesting the two become a crime fighting team, but Dick refuses because he doesn't want to be associated with Jason's violent methods. Not long after, Jason is kidnapped by unknown mobsters. Dick, albeit hesitantly, saves him, and they team up to defeat the Pierce brothers. After the fight Jason leaves New York and drops the Nightwing mantle, leaving Dick a telegraph that says he has returned to normal, and that he still considers Dick family.
•Jason's kidnaps a girl named Mia, wanting to convert her to his side since they both had somewhat similar pasts and he feels they're kindred spirits. She refuses, so he blows up her high school. (WTF JASON???? ����)
•I dunno how to explain this one too much, but basically he went on a mission with a Monitor that he called Bob? And he met an alternate reality version of Batman, who had started killing after Jason's death.. And then the Darkseid thing happens and Batman 'dies', which makes Jason absolutely furious (Because he cares about Bruce despite not agreeing with the way that he handled things back when he died).
•Jason, back as Red Hood, tries to take control of some gang wars to calm things down, but it actually makes things worse. Since Batman is supposed to be dead, and Nightwing is unavailable, Tim is the one who has to help clean up the mess. Jason asks to team up, but Tim refuses because of Jason's questionable methods. Due to a combination of some things, Jason gets shot in the leg and arrested. When the gang war is resolved, Tim stops by the prison Jason was in, using a disguise and a fake name to deliver Jason the code that will let him out of his cell because he believes Jason deserves a chance at redemption.
•After his escape Jason is summoned to the Batcave, where he is brought in to hear his part of Bruce's Last Will and Testament for him(Y'know, since Bruce is supposedly dead lmao). He listens to Bruce's final piece as he talks about out of all his failures, Jason was his biggest, and how he regretted not getting Jason actual help or showing much empathy over him hardships, instead dressing him up and having him fight. Unfortunately this heartfelt message is what makes Jason fully snap.
•Jason began dressing up in a Batman-like outfit, leaving slips of paper saying 'I AM BATMAN' where he worked, however he used much more aggressive and lethal forms of punishment on the criminals he fought. Due to the violent nature of his vigilantism, Nightwing and Damian are after the fake Batman. Dick figures put pretty quickly that the imposter Batman is Jason, and after an argument, Jason shoots Damian. Tim is also searching for the fake Batman at this time, dressing up as Batman as well to demonstrate how Bruce would've really acted. Tim finds Jason's fake Batcave, but has to be saved from a boobytrap by Catwoman. Jason returns to his 'cave' and finds them there, impaling Tim with a Batarang. Dick and Jason fight, with Jason thinking and claiming that Tim is dead, while Damian and the Squire are actually busy saving Tim. Dick kicks Jason off a moving train, but when he tries to pull Jason back up to safety(Because he still considers him family, just as Jason does him), Jason refuses his help and falls to his 'death', while claiming they'll meet again soon. This is when Dick becomes Batman.
•When Jason returned, having survived the fall, he decided to become direct competition to Batman and Robin, making it his mission to get to all of the criminals before them and become the new Gotham Hero. He even got his own sidekick, a girl named Scarlet. Jason was very public about this, posting things on social media, talking about how killing the villains was the best way to do it, and a lot of people actually agreed. At one point Jason kidnapped Dick and Damian, locked them up and stripped them both naked(😰), claiming online that if the post got enough attention, he'd reveal Batman and Robin's secret identities. However his plan was interrupted by an assassin names Flamingo, that he and Scarlet weren't strong enough to beat. Dick and Damian escaped and saved them from death, though Damian got pretty seriously injured.. Jason just ran Flamingo over with a truck- Jason was taken into police custody and as they took him away, he claimed that if the Lazarus Pit could revive him, why couldn't it revive Bruce too?
•After Bruce's revival, Jason files an appeal to Arkham Asylum, wanting to be released because the tests show that he's perfectly sane, just willing to kill. He ends up being transferred to a Gotham prison, where as soon as he arrives, the sewerslide rates spike and there are several homicides(Though these mainly occurred in self defense from Red Hood killing people in the prison who attempt to kill him first). On top of this, Jason poisons the food and kills 82 inmates, making 100 more sick. He's immediately taken back to Arkham Asylum, but is quickly broken out by some mercenaries. Jason breaks free from the mercenaries and fights them off as Batman and Robin arrive. At the end of this mission, Red Hood and Scarlet escape in a helicopter, warning Bruce and Damian not to chase them because he planted bombs all over the city months ago, and he's willing to detonate them. Dick doesn't do anything about, deciding that Jason was lying about the bombs, and that even if Jason decides to do better he'll only rejoin the family when he's ready to.
•Jason, trying to reform, forms his own hero team called the Outlaws. He changes the red symbol on his chest to a bat, a sign of his somewhat awkward but slowly-beginning-to get-back-on even-ground relationship with the Batfamily. The costume he now wears also used to belong to Dick. His relationship with Tim is now at least neutral, if not a little friendly, as the two can be seen eating together and making some jokes. However his relationship with Bruce is still strained, and a bit hostile. While he keeps his aggressive and lethal style of fighting, he now only uses it when he believes necessary, and doesn't always shoot the second he sees a problem.
•At some point his team disappears, and he goes back to being a solo hero.
Extra Fun Fact! Because of the Lazarus Pit, Jason no longer ages and he heals much much faster then a normal human!
TAADAA! I might do more if I get the motivation ^w^
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