#wouldn't you want to tell it kinder if you could

[raayllum]

So when you gonna tell her that we did that, too? She thinks it's special, but it’s all reused A different girl now, but there's nothing new

#it was just red #virenedit #callumedit #wouldn't you want to tell it kinder if you could #olivia rodrigo #music #this is so self indulgent but listen. i Love them #arc 2 #multi #parallels #my edits #graphics #personal fave #tdpedit #tdp #the dragon prince #tdp viren #tdp callum

[yanderenightmare]

TW: nsfw, noncon/dubcon, violence/abuse, threat of bodily harm

gn reader

Thinking about poly yanderes again…

They’re both so patronizing – suffocatingly so. 

But where one is a brute, the other is sweet – or sweeter than the former, in any case...

He has a certain calm about him – gentle with you – considerate when showing his affection, and patient with you when he’s intimate. He doesn’t growl at you to shut up and lie still the way the other one does – instead, he asks you if you can be good for him – if you can let him love you – lipping at your throat without the touch of teeth as he all but begs for your consent.

The brute doesn't bother with such foreplay...

Your will doesn’t seem to interest him in any other aspect than ripping it from you and strangling it in his fist with a big grin, laughing while watching those pitiful tears start slipping down your cheeks.

He'll just shrug off the kinder one when he chides, telling him to stop being so rough with you. He just squeezes you a little tighter, sucks your neck a little harder, and kneads his cock a little deeper – saying that he can do whatever he wants with that which belongs to him.

When you struggle against him, he’s not shy of punishing you accordingly – in fact, he jumps at the opportunity – bending you over his lap with his fist riddled in your hair – landing strike after strike until you’re screaming in surrender, all cute pleas for his mercy, words he’s told you to say. 

He likes fucking you like that – when you’re a broken mess who only clings to him for comfort, crying into his neck while he pumps you full of cock and cum.

The kinder one scolds him afterward. Tells him he’s a fiend while petting your head and hair, carrying you away from the scene and into the bathroom. He draws you a tub of bubbles and holds a glass of water to your lips. But for all his niceties – he still gets in the hot water with you – cock in your sore hole while he washes your hair.

Still, he’s more reasonable.

When he’s tying your wrists to the bedpost like every night of you sleeping stuck in between them, you ask him if it’s really necessary – promising him you’re not going to run away – telling him that you’re going to stay right there, peacefully asleep.

The brute says that it isn’t something that’s up for discussion, that if you push your luck, he’s gonna tie every inch of you up like a floppy fish caught in a net ready to be gutted. But you don’t heed the warning – looking to your kinder warden with puppy eyes and a pout on your lips, saying please, it hurts your wrists – again, promising him you’ll be good and stay sound asleep between them the entire night.

You just needed to get to the door. 

You just needed to get to the door – through the door – out into the street, screaming while at it, and surely someone, anyone, would come to your rescue. 

Why wouldn't your feet move quicker? Why weren’t you faster? Why were you clumsier now? Tripping over rugs, missing steps when scrambling down the stairs, slipping when turning corners – trying to navigate the house when you’d barely ever seen anything but the bedroom.

You just needed to get to the door – but you could hear one of them coming after you – just behind you – big monstrous thundering steps shaking you to the core, strangling your heart, shattering your bones – and it’s getting hard to breathe, hard to see, hard to feel anything other than the numbing fear and the awful way it cripples you – throwing your mind into a tailspin while choking your lungs free of all air, clawing up your throat into a scream. 

You just needed to get to the fucking door –

You hadn't known you could make a sound like that – like something out of a horror movie – high-pitched and desperate – ripped from somewhere raw and primal.

There’s a hand in your hair, yanking you backward where you’re received by a hard chest and an arm snaking around your waist, hoisting you off the ground, kicking and yelling.

It’s the brute. He looks almost happy you’d tried running away – a manic look of delight on his face when he finally drops you down on the floor – pinning you beneath him – shadowing you with teeth seemingly dripping with venom and all the ugly punishments he’s no doubt cooking up inside his sick mind.

“Your ass is gettin’ it extra fuckin’ hard tonight – my handprint won’t heal for a month – won’t even be able to sit down without cryin’.” He growls, his teeth on your cheek as he grips your jaw tight – starting off your punishment with a harsh lovebite.

You look at the more merciful of the two. 

He’s standing off to the side, looking down at the two of you. 

You expect he’d come to the rescue like he’d done all those other times.

But to your utter horror… he isn’t lifting a single finger to stop it. 

His face is blank – cold – as cold as the words that roll dryly off his tongue, “I think we’ve established that spanking isn’t enough…” 

The one holding you down halts in his advances and seems to get just as frigid as you by the cold-blooded tone of his partner – who takes slow steps toward the two of you, so close he’s got your hair pinned beneath his toes before crouching down until he as well looms over you like a darkening storm.

He reaches a stiff hand to soothe the ring of teeth left on your cheek by the other – seemingly kindly, but his eyes are so jaded your breath catches in your throat – soulless as they stare into your teary ones.

“Maybe we ought to get ahead of the issue and break your legs.” He suggests nonchalantly, making both your and your other captor’s faces bleach.

Then he smiles – that kind smile, only now you can’t help but flinch at the sight of it. 

“That way, everyone’s happy,” He states, explaining, “You won't have to be tied up, and we can trust you to keep your word and stay put when you promise us you will.”

Then he stands up and straightens himself, looking at his partner with that same eerie smile.

“Where’d you put the bat again?”

The brute stiffens. His crazed expression had melted in light of the other into a look you’d never seen on him before. He swallows thickly as though he’s just as worried as you are. His voice is hesitant, “I think rope is enough…” 

The other throws his brows up. “Oh?” Then he snaps his focus back to you. “What do you think, baby? You think that’s enough?” He walks back to the two of you, and you feel the intense urge to hide behind the one you’d initially been caught running from.

He looks down at you expectantly, watching your lip quiver as you struggle to form an answer without choking on it.

“Hm? What was that? Rope or bat, what do you prefer?” His voice is sharp, licking at you like a knife.

You stutter, “Ro-rope.”

“Yeah? Okay, then – that’s settled.” He confirms, then looks back at the other. “Go get the rope.”

It doesn’t seem like he wants to leave – almost like he’s afraid of what might happen if he does. “Now?” He asks.

“Yes, now.” The smile tightens – sharpens into something truly lethal if you were to test it. “Our pet thinks they can run wild, so we’ll have to reintroduce them to the leash.”

Then he sets his sights back on you, robbing you of all air.

“Unless you’d prefer the bat after all?”

You whimper, shaking your head with a sniffle, “No-no – rope…”

He looks back to the other. “You heard 'em. Get going.”

He’s reluctant about it – looking from you to him, then back to you again, almost apologetically – before he gets up off you, leaving you on the floor – alone.

Your hair is then grabbed harshly, and you’re pulled up to your feet before you’re dragged off them – pulled along until you’re tugged from the floor up onto his lap as he plopped down, comfortably seated on the couch.

He sighs, letting go of your hair and placing both hands on the fat of your haunches, making you straddle him – mirroring your breathless, tear-streaked face with an expressionless one.

A hand ascends, and you’re convinced he’s going to slap you – but as you squeeze your eyes tightly shut in wait for it, his hand finds your cheek, only to ever-so-gently pet the wet away.

Cupping your face, he places a light peck on the corner of your mouth, followed by his voice, “Apologize, and I’ll forgive you.”

Your eyes peel open, looking back into his. You regret it instantly. Still eclipsed, it’s a cold and blank stare that seems to seize you by the throat.

“I’m sorry, I’ll never- never ever do it again.” You whisper pitifully – as if you’re afraid to be too loud.

“Hm…” He hums, looking unimpressed. “I don’t think that’s good enough…” 

His hand slips from your face down your neck, circling it lightly before squeezing it firmly with whitening knuckles. “You hurt my feelings, y’know? I trusted you, and you lied to me – right to my fucking face.”

You cack, wrapping your smaller hands around his wrist as he strangles the words out of you. “I’m sorry- I’m really- really sorry-”

His breathing is thick, as though something’s bubbling underneath the surface – a beast within whose bloodthirst hasn’t yet been sated. “I want more than empty words.” He states flatly, unforgivingly.

Still, he lets go of your throat, letting you drop to his chest, panting sore breaths with his words ringing hot in your head. You start kissing between sipping for air – desperately, up his neck and jaw, then his lips, even though he doesn’t kiss back – pleading, “Please forgive me- I’m sorry, I-”

“Yeah? You’re sorry?” He mocks, stroking the back of your head, down your back as though soothing you – voice dripping with fake empathy. “Sorry for what exactly? Hm? For being a dumb little bitch, thinking you could run when you haven’t even so much as walked on your own two feet for months.”

A laugh inches into his words like a sickness. The eerie smile returns, small and curling in the corner of his mouth.

“You were fuckin’ hilarious, you know that?” He breathes lightly – eyes wide, staring at you like cornered prey. “Trippin’ over yer own two feet, barely even making it to the door.”

The grip around your throat returns, and you squeak out a whimper.

“Say it.” He seethes, “Say you’re a dumb little bitch who didn’t know what you were doing.” His lips ghost yours with the command, forcing you to echo the words back into his mouth.

“I’m- I’m a dumb little bitch- I’m- I didn’t know what I was doing-” 

He hums at your shivering but doesn’t ease his grip – molding his lips against yours, he kisses you deeply until parting with your lips between his teeth – letting go slowly.

“I- I’ll be good from now on, I promise-” You add – in the hope it would thaw the ice of his stare.

It doesn’t. He keeps them just as jaded – half-masted now as he runs his fingers up and down your spine, brushing your chin and cheek with his lips until blowing on your ear. “You better be.”

You shudder, wincing.

“‘Cause if you ever try anything like that again, I’m gonna go get that bat – and nothing and no one is gonna keep me from bashing away at you until I’ve made certain you can’t lift a single fucking finger without my help.”

You’re a broken mess of sniveling apologies and prayers on his lap by the time the brute comes back with the rope. 

But the one who’d reduced you to it doesn’t seem bothered in the slightest. 

“There you are!” He beams with a bright smile.

Acting as though you weren’t falling apart in his arms, gripping his shirt for purchase while sobbing hard and ugly into his chest. 

“Let’s tie every square inch of 'em up like you suggested.” He muses while picking your tear-stained face up in both hands, nose-kissing you with his words dripping fondly off his tongue. “Just like a floppy fish ready to be gutted.”

BNHA – BakuDeku, DabiHawks, EndMight, ShinKami, TodoDeku, KiriBaku, Shiggy x villain!Deku

JJK – SatoSugu, YujiKuna, YujiGumi

HQ – Miya twins, IwaOi,

BLLK – NagiReo, KuniGiri

AOT - EreMin

DS - InoTan, DouAka

HxH – HisoIllu

#yandere x reader #yandere #yandere x you #yandere imagines #yandere smut #yancore #jujutsu kaisen smut #jujustu kaisen #jujutsu kaisen #yandere jujutsu kaisen #yandere jjk #jjk smut #bnha smut #yandere bnha #mha smut #my hero smut #yandere demon slayer #yandere aot #yandere bllk #yandere blue lock #yandere attack on titan #yandere kimetsu no yaiba #yandere my hero academia #yandere boku no hero academia

[ddejavvu]

I love your best friend with no boundaries James, and I was wondering if you could do one where James and reader are having their regularly scheduled mid-day naps, and Sirius and Remus walk into the dorm to find James just humping reader while they’re asleep? Maybe James and reader wake up to the GASP of horror from Sirius after his not so innocent eyes witness “straight up porn in their shared dorm where Peter of all people could witness”

I love all your works and was wondering if I could be marked as 😻anon? I’m the person who requested the bsf Steve imagine and I’m 100% gonna request something again because you’re perfect and I just wanna kiss you on the mouth🫶🏻🫶🏻

this post is 18+, minors dni.

Sirius considers himself James's best friend- no, brother, but he's not afraid to whack the man upside the head when he finds James grinding on you in his sleep.

"You-! Nasty-! Fucker-!" He bullies James awake, appreciating the much calmer, kinder way that Remus rouses you, tugging you away from James on the bed and murmuring that your nap is over. You blink your eyes open serenely, and James's shoot wide in pain as Sirius assaults him.

"What the fuck? Agh- Sirius! I know you're mad that I've got the better potions grade, but killing me won't help!"

"This isn't about potions, Potter," Sirius scoffs, "But I am thinking about tossing you in a hot cauldron. You were- eeugh, you were humping her, you animal!"

Your brows are furrowed and your blinks are bleary, but your brain catches up with the help of Remus's hands where they trace soothing circles on your back.

"Oh," You mumble groggily, as James groans with quickly reddening cheeks, "Uh- s'alright, Jamie."

Remus's hand stills on your back, but James and Sirius join in a fused indignant-confused "What?"

"S'just natural I guess," You shrug, "I dunno, I haven't- er, got one. But it was an accident, Jamie, you were asleep. It's alright."

James’s cheeks are still plenty rouged, but he nods sleepily at your forgiveness, relieved that he's not being hit by two people instead of only one.

"Yeah, thanks bird," He flops back down onto the mattress, letting out a sigh heavily infused with relief, "Wouldn't do it on purpose, y'know. Not while you're sleeping, that's- that's pervy."

"Some people like pervy," You hum, settling back into your own position in James's bed, though he's no longer curled around you. Sirius watches as you knock your hand against his own, "Sirius thinks I'm a perv."

"You're both pervs," Sirius grimaces, his lip curled in distaste as Remus stands from James's bedside, "Seriously, he eats off of your spoons, you've seen his dick, he's been grinding all over your ass - if you don't get a marriage license soon you're going to be very unpopular with the traditional crowd."

James turns towards you with a gasp, his eyes shining just the same as his grin does, "We could get married!"

"We should," You laugh, "And we could get a flat, and we could have your mother over for dinner every Tuesday."

"That would work." He nods, fully settled back into the pillows from Sirius's disturbance, "She loves you. And she's free Tuesday nights - her knitting circle ends at three."

"I know that," You scoff, barely biting back an overexaggerated eye roll, "James, I write your mother once a week. I know when her knitting circle is."

"You write my mum?" He rears back, momentarily confused, "She's never told me that!"

"Of course she hasn't," You snicker, "Because if you'd known, you would have stopped me from telling her how many times you get detention every week, and you'd want to share the sweets she sends me in exchange for the intel."

#james potter x reader #james potter imagine #james potter scenario #james potter oneshot #james potter one shot #james potter one-shot #james potter headcanon #james potter headcanons #james potter hc #james potter hcs #james potter fanfiction #james potter fanfic #james potter fic #james potter blurb #james potter drabble #james potter dialogue #james potter fluff #james potter x reader fanfiction

[enha-cafe]

you really know how to make me scream

SUMMARY ➤ quick drabbles of getting fucked by ghostface! enhypen (just the obligatory scream/ghostface-themed smut)

WARNING(S) ➤ afab! reader, smut, literal ghostface! serial killers enha, brief mentions of killing, cursing, lowercase intended, blood kink, unprotected sex (don't be silly wrap your willy), creampie, slight dubcon (?), kinda pervy (would it be an enha-cafe thought if there wasn't any pervs?), mirror sex, stomach bulge, mask kink, light choking, petnames (pretty, baby, good girl, doll), voice kink

A/N ➤ i am forever and always obsessed with ghostface! enha

heeseung

cw: mask kink, good girl used like once, light choking, unprotected sex, creampie

"never would've thought you'd liked getting fucked by a psycho, always thought you were such a good girl." even though you know he's a murderer you can't help but whimper at his words. staring into his mask he tells you, "god you feel so wet and tight i can't get enough of you" while moving his hand to squeeze the sides of your neck. you can't help but clench around him causing him to groan. the masked man starts thrusting into you faster and harder. feeling him twitch inside you and the knot in your stomach you know you’re both close. movements quickly becoming sloppier right before the two of you cum. feeling him release inside of you you let out an airy moan as you soon follow him. both of you breathless and he takes off his mask all he does is flash you a smile as he slowly pulls out of you, letting his cum drip out and hit the floor.

jay

cw: petname (doll), use of the voice modulator, voice kink

“i love how you make those pretty noises for me doll” he says speaking into the voice modulator. the sound making your movements stutter and your pussy to flutter around him. “oh you like the voice doll?” violently nodding your head as you look down at him. bringing the modulator to his mouth once more “i want to see you bouncing on my cock again,” he looks at you with a smirk as he teasingly thrusts up to meet your hips. mewling out his name telling him how full you feel. jay moving his right hand from your side to start playing with your clit. the sensation having you grind against his hand causing him to chuckle. “what a cute little doll for me you probably want me to cum inside of you too huh?” the thought of being entirely full of him making you move your hips a little faster and all you can do is look him in the eyes and whimper please.

jake

cw: mention of murder, cursing, petname (good girl), dubcon-ish (?)

"baby i killed that guy because he wanted to fuck you and you would've let him. he didn't deserve you, now be the good girl for me i know you are." you shakily spread your legs open for him. jake leaves kisses on your chest as you slightly struggle to look him in the eyes. “c’mon y/n i need you to look at me or else this won’t be a very fun experience,” he says as he grabs your chin and forces you to stare into his lustful eyes. you don’t even register how he’s started to pry you open on his cock. only fully aware when he bottoms out in you. "you don't know how long I've wanted to fuck this pretty pussy of yours. dreamed of it, killed for it." he mutters into your neck. “now it’s all mine” he says as he starts to pound into you like a mad man. the force causing you to loudly moan out to him, “i knew you could be a good girl for me”

sunghoon

cw: knife play, mirror sex, stomach bulge, petname (pretty, my pretty)

in this very moment, all you can think about is the saying "it's always the quiet ones." maybe if you were a little kinder to him or something you wouldn't be in this situation. watching in the mirror as a knife traces your curves and ghostface himself thrusts into you “c’mon pretty, why are you hiding your noises from me?” he frowns while looking st you through the mirror, "do you not like seeing how deep inside of you i am?" he grabs your hand and forces you to touch the bulge on your stomach, "c'mon pretty talk to me, i might be a killer but I'm not a complete monster. i still like hearing pretty girls such as yourself scream for me... one way or another" he nibbles on your ear causing you to let out a moan and with that he chuckles and starts playing with your clit. "see i knew you could do it for me," making sure to flash you a toothy grin before sucking on your neck, "such pretty noises from my pretty."

sunoo

cw: knife play, blood play, petname (baby)

all you did was answer a phone call, and now you have sunoo holding a blade to your cheek as you’re pinned against a wall watching him thrust into you. “you look so pretty when you think i’m going to hurt you,” he says while sucking on your neck. you let out a whimper of his name and you can feel him throb inside you. “baby let me have a little taste of you,” he says lightly cutting your cheek. the sudden pain causing you to squeeze your legs around his waist even tighter. causing sunoo’s hips to stutter and him to moan at your action as he goes to lick your cheek. moaning at the taste of you and squeezing on your thigh hard enough to leave a bruise. “god i just can’t get enough of you” he says right before pounding into so hard it has your head thrown back.

jungwon

cw: blood kink, knife play, unprotected sex, creampie, cursing

you know you shouldn't. you know you should be afraid. you know he's a killer. but god there's something so hot about a crazy man with blood on his face. especially when he's under you while you bounce on his cock. watching this tough murderer become putty in your hands as he digs his fingers into your hips, "please y/n you feel so good." bending down you capture his moans in a kiss and grab his knife from the bedside. pulling away he follows your lips and he whimpers for you. “you’re so cute” you tell him as you lightly trace his chest with the knife. before you can react you feel him quickly tense up and a warm liquid enter your womb. not even daring to stop his movements all he can say in response is “shit that was hot” as he watches his cum slowly pull out of you.

perma tag list: @hoonslutt @moonlighthoon

#enhypen smut #enhypen hard hours #enhypen hard thoughts #enhypen x reader #enhypen imagines #enhypen scenarios #lee heeseung smut #heeseung smut #jay park smut #park jongseong smut #jake sim smut #sim jaeyun smut #park sunghoon smut #sunghoon smut #kim sunoo smut #sunoo smut #jungwon smut #yang jungwon smut

[gremlingottoosilly]

Am I missing something with monster!ghost? Why can't he impregnate us? I feel bad I want to carry his kids just like I carry everyone else’s. How would he react if I'm like scraping out the rest of 141s sperm out of me to make more room for his just cause I want to see if I can give birth to his babies? I feel like a lackluster breeder...

Ghost is more like an undead shadow than an actual alive monster, unfortunately, so he can't breed us no matter how hard he tries. This is a source of heartbreak for him - as much as he wants to pretend he doesn't care about you being his pet and as much as he hates being all lovey-dovey and adorable with you, it's still stings that he could never mate you properly. He can have sex, yes - but the dead instincts of needing to breed you just keep telling him that this isn't enough, that he wants and needs more. Poor guy, honestly( He almost refuses to fuck you at all in these first few nights - even though it's his time to finally mate you, he would switch his position for Soap or Price, until he wouldn't be able to contain himself anymore. Captain would have to drag him to your leaking pussy by his collar. saying that since they're a pack, they have to mate their little pet properly - all of them. You soon find out that Ghost is somewhat softer than any of his teammates. It's weird, since he is just so big and hulking all the time, but he is much, much kinder to you than you'd think. Especially in the Summer times, when it's so hot you would willingly go to him and be by his side all the time, even when other people from the pack want to fuck you. it's just too warm for that(

#ghost x reader #monster!ghost #ghost #yandere ghost

[suguru-getos]

What about yan Satosugu who take it too far? Imagine them breaking their darling to a damage they can’t repair?

ksjdfshgkkjsh this is my favorite troupe.

warnings: v v v dark! (reader die-th? reader can contemplate :3), belt-spanking, reader ran away from satosugu, mentions of throwing-up, abuse, self-harm.

"please daddy, please no no no…" little human that satoru and suguru loved oh so much, why did you have to escape? it breaks their heart. you know it just from their facial expressions. "suguru- please" you whine out, shuddering and crying with wailing screams. you are hung from the ceiling, throttling on your tippytoes, ass bruised from the way the belt welts on you. you are bleeding from the skin breaking. "daddy- please." your voice stops coming out from your throat, too traumatized and destroyed by screaming and wailing for mercy. "please- please" you are wheezing out in air, your own voice has given up. "ssh, it's okay. just 4 more." suguru chides, "didn't want to hurt you." he muses, landing the smack of the belt across your ass once more. satoru smirked, oh you look so cute, unable to scream anymore and just dancing on your feet with the impact. you feel nausea hurling your movements, throwing up because you couldn't take it anymore. though nothing comes out except water… you haven't eaten well, since after your running spree.

that stops suguru, and satoru hugs you gently. "just three more." they have decided they would finish the punishment no matter what. "sshh~ don't worry, doing so good for us. I will clean you up." if you really can't be theirs, they would make you fear them into submission. make you fear them and forcefully take their love which they're owed.

the next three hits come, and when it stops. you're too dazed with pain to even register the comfort. the flesh of your ass raw and agitated. bruised, welted, veins popped and skin breaking in blood. "ssh ssh, that's it. it's over now. you did so good. it's all over." suguru coos, demeanor changed instantly as he gathers you in his arms. immediately taking you towards the bathroom. they need to clean up their poor baby. "why do you even run away angel… do you not know we are the strongest?"

satoru sighs, he is still wrangled by the feeling of betrayal intertwined with the feeling of guilt for giving you so much pain, panic and trauma.

"that's okay princess… you wouldn't do it again right? tell suguru you wouldn't do it again." he asks you gently, ignoring the way your half-lidded eyes do not respond after the torture. oh you're passing out, satoru gnaws at his lip, watching you look lifeless.

it was expected, you passed out in front of suguru and satoru. and they had a long discussion whether or not it was right or wrong to subject you into something like this. "satoru, punishments are supposed to hurt." suguru reminds, while satoru nods, "not until she passes out, she even threw up…" he sighs, "but she didn't need to run, that's also true." suguru nodded. "I know, I can understand that… hurts me more than it hurts her." suguru chimes, and satoru nods. "I wouldn't be able to do it, I would've stopped when she started crying." he admits, only suguru could get firm enough to carry it throughout.

they are mixed with guilt and promise each other to be kinder, there is no way you would actually love them after this. that fleeting hope that fueled satoru's delusion was now making him restless.

the next day when you wake up, you were a completely different person, screaming from panic the moment the two men entered with breakfast, it was so evident how your fear made you cry out for help. it makes suguru tear up, because you do not look at satoru the way you look at suguru. you look like you want to die, like you would do anything to be granted death.

"angel… it's okay, it's all over. please-" suguru almost begs, and you feel like throwing up again. this time satoru takes the lead, walking towards you and hugging you. he was clearly not welcome. yet… your body couldn't help but relax a little under his warm embrace. it was only until a few hours later, that they found you in the bathroom, head bleeding… passed out. you had just excused yourself to shower. limping all the way… to inflict a pain like that, was terrifying. who said they could only instil pain and fear into you. you couldn't find blades, couldn't find anything… so you banged your head against the fucking wall instead… "is this how much you fucking hate me!" satoru screams out, checking your pulse.

"SUGURU!" he screams, and the latter comes out rushing. watching you life-less in satoru's hold. "is- is she?" suguru blinks, tears brimming in his eyes.

it was clear, satosugu could never hope to win. not when you clearly fear them more than your own death.

#stsg #satosugu #yandere satosugu #yandere satosugu x reader #yandere jjk #yandere jujutsu kaisen #yandere jjk x reader #yandere gojo x reader #yandere geto x reader #yandere gojo x geto x reader #gojo x geto x reader #jjk angst #jujutsu kaisen angst

[hazbin-a-helluvamagines]

How bout angel dust, Verosika and Alastor with a puppy hybrid s/o? Like, they have puppy ears and tail and has some dog like tendencies?

For example: they love to bite and play with dog toys,they bark and growl, they LOVE headpats and being called "good boy/girl"

You can remove 2 characters if it's too much.

"Good Puppy!" ; Alastor, Angel Dust, Verosika Mayday

I'll be honest here: I have no idea how you got this to happen, because this man absolutely HATES dogs, and therefore hated you when he first met you. And he's honestly quite possibly the worst one to be with as a puppy hybrid.

He was exceptionally cruel, calling you a "mangey mongrel", a "rabid mutt", and just about any cruel name for a dog under the sun.

Will try to make you act more human. He'd despise your dog features. Dogs remind him of his death, and that's something he'd rather not deal with.

If you've managed to start dating him, he'll be slightly more polite, but still make his distaste for those features very apparent to you.

"S/O, must you constantly be wiggling that furry abomination?"

It isn't that he means to be mean, but, well, in some primal way, you scare him, and he doesn't know how to cope with feeling that helpless.

If you growl or bark at him, you will ROYALLY piss him off, and he will actually need to leave to avoid either lashing out at you or having a mental breakdown.

Fortunately, with enough time and patience, he will eventually calm down and begin to regard you as safe, and not someone he needs to fear. Then he'll become noticeably kinder to you.

"Well, aren't you just a dandy little pup! Excited to see me, hm? Such a good boy/girl~."

He may have started off cold, but he's trying to be better for you now.

He isn't sure how he feels about dog toys and the like, but hey, he's a literal cannibal and serial killer, who is he to judge? As long as you're having fun.

Eventually, he'll begin to give you those headpats you so crave, realizing how happy it makes you. He can stand a bit of discomfort for your sake.

But seriously... please don't bark or growl at him, he still doesn't like the moment of panic he's forced to feel when that happens.

He wouldn't do it to you, so don't do it to him. That's his one boundary with your dog-like behavior/appearance.

Oh boy. He'd be the one constantly flirting and teasing you for your traits, but in a loving (and very NSFW) manner.

"What's with the tail, Ears? Got a pet play kink or somethin'?"

When he finds out you ACTUALLY enjoy being called a good boy, that actually sets off every single one of his teasing instincts.

Every single day, you'll hear a joke about you having a praise kink, purely because it makes Angel laugh.

But he's only teasing, of course. If you actually tell him you're uncomfortable, of course he'll stop. The last thing he wants is for you to feel uncomfortable with him.

He'll also get you dog toys and chew toys if you find them fun!

And his absolute favorite thing to do is pet your ears and ruffle your tail, especially if they're as fluffy as his chest is! He finds the sensation soothing.

If you growl at him, chances are he'll growl back at you just to mess with you.

Or he'll make a claw motion and do the little "rawr~" thing because he finds it amusing how you react when you don't know how to respond to something.

He'll also definitely tease you if your tail ever wags.

"That a tail or are ya just happy ta see me, baby boy~?"

He's a tease but... very sweet. Toward you, at least.

At first, she didn't really see the appeal of dating a puppy hybrid. She treats Vortex like a guard dog, and she initially expected you to be the same.

But of course, who could resist a cute puppy? She quickly warmed up to you, finding you absolutely adorable. Whereas Verosika is sultry and seductive, you were cute and innocent, and she loved that about you.

She'd often find herself petting your head and telling you what a good boy/girl you were, seemingly without actually consciously meaning to. She just couldn't resist, the puppy eyes were too much for her!

"Aww, S/O! Such a good boy/girl! Who's my good boy/girl? You are! Yes you are!"

Yeah, even after you start dating, that doesn't change. She still calls you that, but her affections now run even deeper.

As in, she buys you a LOT of dog toys. A lot. She doesn't know why you love them so much, but she knows she wants you to be happy, because you absolutely deserve it.

She's also greatly amused whenever you bark or growl, but shh, don't tell anyone. That isn't part of her persona!

Sometimes, when you're cuddling, she'll wrap her tail around yours and slowly wag them both, since she knows it both stimulates you and expresses affection.

She'd also probably use your barking and growling to her advantage to scare people she doesn't like off. Nine times out of ten, it works. Dogs can be pretty scary when they're not being friendly actively, and puppies are no different.

"That was amazing, S/O. You really know how to scare a little bitch off!"

You didn't really mean to scare anyone, but you were happy Verosika was happy.

She did send that person an apology note at your insistence, though, luckily.

#verosika x reader #helluva boss verosika #helluva verosika #verosika helluva boss #verosika mayday #hb verosika #angel dust hazbin hotel #hazbin angel dust #hazbin hotel angel dust #alastor #angel dust #alastor hazbin x reader #alastor hazbin hotel #hazbin alastor #hazbin hotel alastor #angel dust x reader #alastor x reader #helluva boss x reader #helluva x reader #helluva boss x you #helluva boss x y/n #hazbin hotel x reader #hazbin hotel x you #hazbin hotel x y/n #hazbin x y/n #hazbin x you #hazbin x reader #helluvaboss #helluva boss #hazbin hotel

[neil-gaiman]

Hello Mr. Gaiman... I know this ask is kind of unusual, but right now I feel so heartbroken and hurt.

Do you think that having a soft heart is wrong? Is it not viable today?

We live in a decadent world full of shitty people and harsh truths; and my boyfriend thinks I should be more cold-hearted, because "life isn't like the books you read".

I know that!! But I can try! Why I should behave like everyone else? I still believe in goodness, and tenderness, and love. I hold so close to my heart all of the ideals that people like you, or Lewis or Tolkien, wrote in their books.

Maybe I'm naïve, but I think that quote from The Silver Chair (Lewis) express exactly what I feel: “I'm on Aslan's side even if there isn't any Aslan to lead it. I'm going to live as like a Narnian as I can even if there isn't any Narnia.”

Do you get the sentiment? Is not that I believe in magical worlds or talking lions... But in the firmness of their convictions.

Am I childish? I'm a grown up, living in this world where people expect from us that we treat each other with coldness, and having a tender heart and is treated with disdain and mockery.

I feel so sad, and I hope you could answer me. If not, I won't be disappointed, just wanted to vent my feelings... And, sir, I respect you so much.

Hope you can understand me.

We set our own standards. I tend to err, where I can, on the side of softness, kindness and forgiveness, because I'd like to live in a softer, kinder and more forgiving world. (And I've also learned that when people tell me things about how I should change "for my own good" that my own good is normally the last thing that they care about and that I should run hard and fast in the other direction.)

No, you're not childish. And it wouldn't matter if you were. Children tend towards kindness and are outraged, when they perceive it, by unfairness. (And another C.S. Lewis quote for you: “When I became a man I put away childish things, including the fear of childishness and the desire to be very grown up.”)

[buccini555]

𝐓𝐨𝐤𝐲𝐨 𝐑𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐫𝐬: "𝐏𝐫𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐲 𝐞𝐧𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡"

˖◛⁺⑅♡ Them reacting to you saying you don't feel pretty

₍ᐢ..ᐢ₎ · ° H e a d c a n o n s !

⋆ ࣪. 𝐹𝑡. Ran Haitani, Rindou Haitani, Sanzu Haruchiyo, Kakucho Hitto, Izana Kurokawa, Shinichiro Sano, Inui Seishu and Kokonoi Hajime

𝗪𝗮𝘁𝗰𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘀𝗻𝗼𝘄𝗳𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝗦𝗲𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘂 𝗜𝗻𝘂𝗶 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗞𝗼𝗸𝗼𝗻𝗼𝗶 𝗛𝗮𝗷𝗶𝗺𝗲/Ambient Music Playlist (𝑆𝑝𝑒𝑑 𝑢𝑝)

•.*° 𝐑𝐚𝐧 𝐇𝐚𝐢𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐢

Ran always had in mind the fact that you had problems with your own appearance, despite that, in a way, he just couldn't understand you the way he really wanted.

"What? Pretty enough? You're much more than enough, It's true, baby you're perfect to me." Ran would speak in a calm tone while gently running his hand through some strands of your hair.

Later, after hugging you for a few brief minutes, he would make you look at him and pay attention to his every word.

"I hope you don't think I'm lying when I tell you how perfect you are." Right then, Ran wouldn't rush to stop kissing you.

•.*° 𝐑𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐨𝐮 𝐇𝐚𝐢𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐢

It is undeniable that initially Rindou could not have the necessary understanding to try to understand your problems with your appearance since he finds you extremely attractive, despite this, when he realized the seriousness of your lack of self-esteem, he began to pay more attention in you.

"You're already pretty enough for me, you don't need to say those things about yourself my sweet." Rindou would speak in a serious tone, hugging you right after, while he wanted to comfort you, he would be a little afraid to say something that could make you feel worse.

"You know you should believe me, don't you?" Stroking your hair affectionately, he would speak calmly, Rindou honestly wasn't lying when he said he thought you were incredibly perfect.

•.*° 𝐒𝐚𝐧𝐳𝐮 𝐇𝐚𝐫𝐮𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐲𝐨

Haruchiyo always showers you with the most varied compliments possible and never hides how obsessed he is with your beauty, despite this fact, he understands your problems with your appearance and always at least tries to help you overcome them.

"Don't you think you're pretty enough for me? You know that's not true, baby." He would express his displeasure in a few words, despite being somewhat reserved, Sanzu went to great lengths to try to make you see yourself in a kinder way.

"Listen to me." He would hold your face making you look directly into his gray eyes.

"You're perfect, I wouldn't say that for nothing." Haruchiyo would say in a serious tone.

•.*° 𝐊𝐚𝐤𝐮𝐜𝐡𝐨 𝐇𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐨

Your lack of self-esteem was something that really worried Kakucho, even so, he committed to helping you in the best and kindest way possible.

"Enough? What do you mean? Listen to me, princess. You are much more than perfect, much more than beautiful, believe me, hmm?" He would say gently caressing your face and kissing your forehead, Kakucho really doesn't like seeing you sad, for that reason, he would always do his best to keep you well and would always praise you.

"See? You have the most beautiful smile I've ever seen, I'll never get tired of saying that." With a shy smile, he would speak when he finally managed to make you smile at him.

•.*° 𝐈𝐳𝐚𝐧𝐚 𝐊𝐮𝐫𝐨𝐤𝐚𝐰𝐚

Izana doesn't accept the fact that you don't think you're beautiful, he simply can't understand the motivation for such low self-esteem.

"Baby, listen to me, you're perfect, believe me, please." He would speak in a completely serious tone, Izana didn't like hearing you being so hard on yourself, for that reason, he wouldn't allow you to say things like that.

"I know it seems selfish of me, but I can't understand it, I just wanted you to see the same beauty in yourself that I see." Izana would pay more attention to his speech and manners so as not to end up hurting you, and he would also be even more determined to help you see yourself in the adorable way he saw you.

•.*° 𝐒𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐢𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐫𝐨 𝐒𝐚𝐧𝐨

Shinichiro has always been aware of your problems with your appearance, although he can't understand how you really feel, the older one always goes out of his way to try to make you feel beautiful.

"Hey, hey, hey... Don't talk like that! Baby, you're beautiful." The taller one would say while holding your face, making you look at him and pay full attention to his every word.

"Someday, you'll realize how beautiful you are, that you'll even let go of me, I'm sure of it." He would say trying to lighten the situation, Shinichiro definitely wasn't very good with words, but he really remained determined to make you see yourself with a kinder look.

•.*° 𝐈𝐧𝐮𝐢 𝐒𝐞𝐢𝐬𝐡𝐮

Seishu never had as high a self-esteem as people imagine, for that reason, in a way, he understands you like no one else would.

"Don't be so cruel to your own appearance." He would say looking at you directly, as if he was noticing every detail of you.

"You're simply the most beautiful person I've ever seen, I know you might not believe it, but try to give yourself the chance to see how beautiful you are..." He would say smiling, gently caressing your face and giving you a soft kiss.

Inui is usually the type of person who expresses himself with few words, so he believed he had already done enough, even if he wanted to just spend a few long hours praising absolutely everything about you.

•.*° 𝐊𝐨𝐤𝐨𝐧𝐨𝐢 𝐇𝐚𝐣𝐢𝐦𝐞

Koko felt unable to understand your low self-esteem, in his eyes, you always were and always will be the most perfect person that could exist, of course, far beyond your appearance.

"Don't say that about yourself, you are much more than beautiful, much more than enough, you know..." Kokonoi would tell you as soon as he heard you saying that you didn't think you were pretty enough, the taller one would gently hold your face and spend a few seconds observing you in silence right after.

"...If you could only see yourself the way I see you, you would realize how perfect you are." In a low tone of voice, he would say almost as an outburst, Hajime would go to great lengths to make you see yourself in a kinder way.

#haitani ran #ran headcanons #ran haitani #rindou haitani #rindou headcanons #haitani rindou #sanzu tokyo revengers #sanzu haruchiyo #sanzu headcanons #tokyo revengers kakucho #kakuchohedcanons #kakuchohitto #izana headcanons #izana kurokawa #tokyo revengers izana #sano shinichiro #shinichiro sano #shinichiro headcanons #inui seishu #inuiheadcanons #inupi seishu #kokonoihcs #kokonoi hajime #kokonoi headcanons #tokyorev headcanons #tokyo revengers #tokyo rev #tokyorevengersheadcanons #tokyorev x reader #tokyorevengers

[the-modern-typewriter]

Hi! Could you do a snippet where the villain says, "I knew I would break you and I think I just found out how." Then the hero, in defeat, whispers, "I think so too"?

"I knew I would break you and I think just found out how."

"I think so too." The whisper of it was barely audible.

The villain heard, though, and smiled tenderly.

The hero's shoulders notched another inch tighter, another inch more protectively curled in, as if that might somehow save them. Or perhaps, it was the defeat, so heavy that they couldn't help but crumple and cave in the face of it.

In the face of them.

"But what to do with a broken thing?" the villain mused. "All the glistening vulnerability of you, cracked open and there for the taking. You're not beyond repair. Not yet."

The hero's vision hazed with a useless panic.

"Humans are remarkably resilient." The villain moved closer, dragging a thumb over the hero's bloodied lip. "People underestimate how difficult it is to break them beyond repair. At least, if we take death out of the equation. That is a certain kind of breaking, but by far the least interesting."

The hero said nothing. They couldn't remember a single word in any language. They numbly let the villain hold them, braced, for the inevitable.

"There are people who tell me I should break you properly," the villain continued, studying them. "They are eager for it. You didn't believe I could do it." The villain's head tipped. "You would make a beautiful example, wouldn't you?"

The hero met the villain's eyes.

"Do I need to break you?" the villain asked. "Or is knowing that I can enough?"

"I don't think it's about need," the hero managed. They finally dredged up enough resolve to wrench away, not that the villain's touch was more than a poison caress of a thing.

"No?" The villain let their hand fall.

The hero wet their dry lips. "I think it's about what you want."

The villain considered them, for a moment, with the loving violence of a sculptor first holding a chisel against untouched marble.

"What are the other options with a broken thing?" they asked. "Rearrange your insides and put you back again as something new, something else, something mine? Put you back together with the knowledge that all it would take is a tap and you would be shattered forever?"

"You'd know better than me. You've done this before."

"You have no opinion on the matter?"

"I'm trying not to."

"I think I'm going to break you properly," the villain said, confidingly. "I think it would be kinder."

"Nothing about this is kind."

"Alas, an opinion."

"Alas." The hero's heart felt waterlogged with loss. "You haven't broken me yet. Not beyond repair."

"No. But I'm told the waiting is agony. Is it?"

The hero said nothing. They closed their eyes.

"Yes," the villain said, oh so soft. "I believe it is."

Then they got to work.

#heroes and villains #villains #writing #creative writing #story #writing snippet #fiction #story snippet

[sixteenth-days]

for the fanon swap: vex joe hills?

"Are you going to stop following me," Cleo said, keeping her eyes forward. She could still smell the lingering reek of burning flesh and woodsmoke, clinging to her clothes. She needed a bath, was what she needed.

"Well, you did burn my house down!" the now-familiar chirpy voice answered from directly behind her shoulder. "I don't have anywhere else to return to!"

She gritted her teeth and swatted ineffectively at it. "That doesn't mean I want you around!"

"I can tell!" the vex said. "But, you know, they always say the road is kinder with a friend."

"We're not friends."

"We could be!" the vex said encouragingly. Cleo strongly considered just killing herself to return to spawn. Sure, she'd lose all the carefully stacked and hard-won resources in her inventory, but on the other hand, at least she wouldn't have to deal with- "We haven't even been introduced yet. What's your name?"

"I'm not telling you that," she grumbled, checking her coordinates again. Oh, she had a long walk ahead of her yet.

"Mine is Joe! Pleasure to meet you."

She blinked, and, against her better judgement, finally glanced over her shoulder to look at him. "I didn't know vex had names."

"Mostly they don't!" Joe agreed. "But I'm a believer in self-determination! Descartes said that the only thing you can be certain of is yourself. For me, it stands to reason that we should better understand ourselves to better understand the world around us! So I decided to get a name."

She stared at him for a moment, baffled.

"I'm Cleo," she said, eventually.

"Cleo!" he said, and grinned, all tiny sharp teeth, "I am delighted to make your acquaintance."

#my writing #joe hills #zombiecleo #fanon switcheroo prompts #asks

[raayllum]

Just one spell, and you never thought about dark magic again? Well, I've read a lot about it.

#it was just red #arc 2 #4x07 #5x09 #s4 #s5 #pawns #mine #parallels #it's like poetry it rhymes #wouldn't you want to tell it kinder if you could #callum doing dark magic in 2x07 leading to the 5x08 shit storm #but only time will tell what his 5x08 choices lead to (jk we know lmao) #POSSESSION PLOT LINE BAYBEY #light and darkness motif #i'll be your slaughterhouse #for the aaravos and rayla positioning shhh i know it's a reach but i like it #tdp #the dragon prince

[izels-writing]

s. black — the herbology weakness

Pairing: sirius black x fem!potter!reader

Summary: being james potter’s little sister was tough, it was even tougher when you had a crush on his best friend

Warnings: she’s so in love it’s school girl crush, fluff, angst toward the end, mentions of death

being james potter's little sister meant one of two things. one, you were pretty popular, and it helped that you were beautiful and smart as well. two, you weren't allowed to fancy his best mates. more specifically, his best friend, sirius black.

usually, you didn't complain, you didn't care, you could care less than not caring. that was until the end of their fourth year, when you realized that you were falling for the one and only. which was hell all on its own, no need to add on the fact that if he did fancy you back, you wouldn't be able to date.

now, you were in your fifth year, while your brother was in his sixth. over the summer, sirius had moved in after his family disowned him, and it made your crush worse, but in all, you were glad he was safe. as of right now though, you were in the library with lily evans, your best friend since your second year, a friend you had acquired with a funny story.

you had introduced yourself, using your full name, and at first she was about to turn you away, thinking you were exactly like your brother, but you quickly proved her wrong. all you did was politely ask if you could sit and talk with her, considering your brother had left you in the dust to join his friends. she quickly accepted.

james, of course, was jealous.

"y/n? you there?" lily chuckled, waving a hand in front of your face. you snapped out of your daze, and chuckled, nodding at her.

"what? are you thinking about black again?" lily teased quietly. she had been the only one to find out about your crush, though she did tell you that everyone could see it besides your brother and the boy you fancied himself.

you shook your head quickly, feeling a blush grow. "no! just thinking about exams this year." you replied nonchalantly.

lily sighed, "they're not so bad." she replied quietly. you felt a pang of guilt, knowing that time period was a touchy subject. sure, james and sirius had humiliated snape, but what you had done after finding out what he called lily was much worse.

you smiled, grabbing her hand gently. "hey," you said softly, "it's his loss."

lily smiled reassuringly and nodded. quickly, her sadness faded. "you're right. anyway, we've got more—"

a thump interrupted her words, making you both snap in the direction of the noise. it had been at the entrance of the library, where you two were near, but slightly hidden.

"padfoot! come on! focus! what's got you all unfocused? we've got pranks to execute in a couple of weeks." a boy with messy hair asked, looking at the handsome boy beside him. sirius shook his head, "nothing, mate, nothing."

remus chuckled, "a certain lady got your interest, pads?" he asked.

you felt your heart sink, despite not hearing sirius' response yet. if he was in love, it surely wouldn't be you. the thought alone made your heart break.

"moons, st—"

"n/n! hey! what are you doing?" james said, walking over to you, swooping down to kiss your head.

one thing about you and james, you grew up with tons of affection, so this was common between the two of you. not to mention, you two were only a year apart and rather close — despite being polar opposites.

"hey, jamsie. i'm just here with lily. what are you mauraders up to?" you asked, smiling at them, pretending as though you hadn't heard remus before. sirius beamed back at you, making your smile grow.

"practicing for DADA and stuff. real material here. want to join in, evans?" james asked, his genuine kindness actually seeping through.

lily, however, shook her head. "no thanks, potter. i've got to get back to common room anyway, some other time?" she suggested. you and sirius shared a look, impressed by her much kinder words.

james smiled and nodded. "yeah, alright."

lily gave him a small smile, and gathered her things, walking off. finally, when she was out of earshot, you and sirius broke.

"wow! she was actually nice to you!" sirius said, giggling like an idiot.

you chuckled, "yeah! she even addressed you by potter and not a toerag!" you added.

james scowled at you two. quickly, remus stepped in.

"alright you two. enough teamwork. let james have his moment." remus chuckled. james grinned, patting remus' back. "thank you, moony."

"anytime, prongs." remus breathed out, patting james' back as well.

"aw, it's all in good fun. right, love?" sirius said, looking to you for reassurance. you paused for a moment. he hadn't ever addressed you as love. but, perhaps he was getting accustomed to being part of the potters.

you took a subtle deep breath, nodding and smiling. "right you are, hon." you replied. he smiled at you, but worrying you'd blush or give yourself away, you looked down at the book in your lap.

james narrowed his eyes at the two of you, but said nothing. remus and peter struggled to fight the urge to just yell out about your feelings for each other.

"so, y/n, how's studying coming along?" remus asked.

you groaned, "don't even get me started! i know all of this stuff, i know i do, but i'm afraid that i'll forget it as soon as i get to the exams! now, herbology though, it's a nightmare. i know nothing."

"why are you studying so early anyway? it's barely january." james mumbled, shaking his head at you. you glared at him, but turned back to remus, who had a small smile on his face.

"well, if you'd like, i can help you study? i mean i've taken the exam so i know what to expect." remus suggested. you grinned, "yes! of course! please!"

sirius crossed his arms and leaned against a bookcase, rolling his eyes at the two of you. remus pretended not to notice, while you stayed oblivious.

"okay! why don't you come to our dorm on saturday? the boys will all be at hogsmeade so we'll have the dorm to ourselves." remus suggested. you nodded with a bright smile, "yes! of course! thank you so much!"

you threw yourself at him, hugging him and kissing his cheeks gently. he hugged back with a laugh, then let you go so you could get back to your common room.

once you had left, james overcame his shock.

"are you planning on being in a dorm alone with my little sister? are you mental?! no!" james exclaimed. madam pince scowled and shushed him loudly before walking off.

"yeah! you're insane if you think we're gonna let you be alone! i mean what exactly are you thinking? you alone with a beautiful girl like her?!" sirius exclaimed. madam pince shushed him again. james didn't seem to notice sirius' comment.

remus rolled his eyes. "calm down you two! i've got a date with someone on saturday, i was actually hoping sirius could fill in."

sirius glared at him, knowing what remus was doing, but james hadn't, and probably would never catch on.

"why?" james asked dumbfounded.

remus sighed, "if you haven't noticed, she's mainly studying herbology, her weakness. it so happens padfoot is spectacular at herbology. get where i'm going with this?"

"oh..." james stretched out the 'o' sound, nodding slowly. "well, i suppose that is pretty reasonable. as long as pads doesn't make any moves."

sirius scoffed, "as if." he told them. remus gave him a look, to which he ignored.

sirius was utterly in love with you. it started in the beginning of his fifth year, he hadn't realized it right away, in fact, he thought it was merely a familial connection. then he started noticing the little things. the light blush when you talked to him. the way you bit your lip when you were concentrating. or, whenever you were excited about something, you'd immediately go to james to tell him. usually he'd dismiss it, like the older brother he was, but sirius wouldn't. sirius would listen for hours and hours, until you got every single point across. in his eyes, you were the most amazing person he knew.

that's when it had hit him.

and merlin had he been falling hard.

——

saturday has rolled around quickly for you. classes had flown by, with the shit ton of homework, like usual. finally, after lunch, you made your way to your brothers dorm.

as you pushed the door open, expecting the lone werewolf on the other side, you immediately started yelling/singing the beginning of bohemian rhapsody. you and remus always greeted each other this way. unfortunately for you, it was not remus on the other side.

"is this the real life?! is this just fant—oh my god!" you exclaimed, your eyes widening as you looked at the raven-haired boy in front of you. he was smirking at you, as if he was amused by you.

"sirius! uhm, where's remus?" you asked with a nervous laugh, tugging at your large sweater, that happened to be sirius'. you had stolen it as a joke, but he let you keep it, mumbling something about how it looked better on you. and you didn't exactly object.

"had a date with a lady. he asked me to tell you that he's sorry about that by the way." sirius replied, smiling at you now, glancing at your fidgeting hands.

god this is very embarrassing, you thought.

"oh! well, i'll just study with him another time then. thanks for letting me know! b-" you said quickly.

"woah, woah, woah! hold on! we're studying together, baby potter!" sirius exclaimed, rushing over to you before you could completely disappear out of view.

you tilted your head to the side, "we are?"

sirius chuckled, "yeah! why do you think i waited here? besides, i happen to be amazing at herbology." he replied boastfully.

you knew studying with him would somehow make you fancy him even more. you were so sure of it. anything sirius black did was like angel's singing to you. well, that may have been a bit of an exaggeration, but still. you wanted to object, turn him down, and just study with remus.

but again, your words failed you.

"...okay. but i'd better get a good homework grade and exam grade. i've been failing herbology, getting p's and d's. not exactly my style." you said. he nodded with a small smile.

"alright then." he replied, bringing you back into the dorm.

—

thirty minutes in, and you were already lost. you were lost in one of two things. his words and what he was trying to explain, (you didn't understand mostly but you loved hearing him talk), and his eyes. merlin, his eyes. they were a beautiful grey color, and you always did love the color grey. you wouldn't stare at him for too long, but it was long enough for you. but you were careful in getting caught.

"alright, now, touching the trunk of a wiggentree protects you from what?" sirius asked, looking up from the textbook. you looked down at your textbook blankly, before looking back up at him.

"um...dark creatures?" you guessed. he smiled and nodded.

you grinned and took a deep breath. finally you were getting somewhere. despite only having guessed that. it was a start, because you usually never even guessed right. professor sprout had given up on trying to force you to focus ages ago.

"now, from the top..."

——

wednesday had been the day you were dreading. after studying with sirius, you wrote your essay the next day. then you handed it in monday, and now, you were going to be receiving it back. you were beyond nervous. you hated failing as it is, but you also didn't want sirius to think you had wasted his time.

"miss potter," professor sprout said, handing you your essay with a small smile as you were about to leave the greenhouse, "well done."

you furrowed your eyebrows, walking past the other students and stopping on the way up the hill. you slowly opened your essay, fearing the worst, until you noticed the actual grade.

an E.

you never got an E in herbology.

you gasped in shock, feeling a burst of excitement. you hoisted your bag over you shoulder, and began running toward the castle, where you knew sirius would be. it was about lunch time now.

you ran as fast as your feet would take you, pushing past people and smiling like an idiot. you scanned around the corridor, until your eyes finally landed on a tall, handsome boy with remus, your brother, and peter.

you ran over, not caring if you looked like an imbecile, and stopping suddenly in front of him. you frantically opened the essay again, turning it around to show the boy.

"you got an E!" he said excitedly.

"i got an E!" you repeated, matching his excitement.

you threw your arms around him, hugging him tightly. he hugged back happily, laughing into your shoulder.

"that's my girl! i knew you could do it!" he said. you blushed, giggling softly.

"thank you." you mumbled, pulling back from the hug, keeping your arms around his neck. he pulled back a little too, but kept his arms around your waist as well.

then, it happened.

you weren't sure who leaned in first. in fact, you weren't even sure who instigated this. all you knew was that you were kissing sirius black right now and it was nothing like how you imagined it.

it was better.

he was gentle and sweet. his hands were on your hips, resting softly. your hands were intertwined around his neck.

finally, you both pulled back, slightly out of breath. you would've forgotten about the boys behind you, had it not been your brother yelling.

"what?! what's—?! i-" james stammered, glancing between you and sirius. remus and peter sighed in relief and also in tiredness.

"take a walk, james..." peter mumbled, turning james around and patting his back, pushing him toward the great hall.

"my sister and my best mate...my best mate and my sister...y/n and sirius...sirius and y/n..." james mumbled.

remus chuckled, "we'll leave you to it then..." he said, walking off with the other two.

you turned to sirius, who was smiling the happiest smile you had ever seen. you were happy too, because merlin was he was amazing, but your defenses quickly came up.

"listen sirius, i don't want to be some fling or whatever—" you mumbled.

sirius chuckled and shook his head quickly, "trust me, y/n, you're not a fling. i fancy you, more than i've ever fancied anyone."

"you sure?" you asked softly, despite already feeling like you knew the answer. he never called you by your name, it was always baby potter or n/n, never y/n. deep down you knew he wasn't lying.

"of course! you're the best person i've ever met! i fancy you for you! why do you think i gave you that sweater? why do you think i make you tea when you're not feeling all too great? why-"

you kissed him quickly, smirking at him when you pulled away.

he laughed, and you noticed a pink tint on his cheeks. "alright, i get it. point is, will you, please, go out with me?" he asked.

you shrugged, "only cause you said please." you replied with a smirk. sirius chuckled, ruffling your hair up and wrapping his arm around you.

"love, you'll be the death of me." he said.

"i'm a potter. it's what we do best." you grinned.

bonus:

harry reached for the photo that was sitting on the table. sirius had left it, likely on accident because it seemed to be the only lively thing in grimmauld place. but it was also intriguing. he had never seen this woman before. she was standing beside his mother and father, and sirius, smiling like there was no tomorrow. she looked a lot like his father, black hair and hazel eyes. her hair, however, looked rather tamer. this had to be his parents wedding day, mostly because lily wore a white dress, and james wore a nice, black suit.

"harry? have you seen—oh thank merlin, you have it. where'd you find it?" sirius asked, smiling lightly at the boy. harry gestured at the table, but didn't tear his eyes from the woman.

she looked familiar. oddly familiar. though, he knew he had never met her.

"sirius...who is this?" he asked tentatively, still staring at the woman on the picture.

sirius walked over with a sad smile, feeling his heart break more and more as he saw your bright smile. he hadn't seen your smile in almost sixteen years.

"your aunt, on your dads side. she and james were closer than i could've ever imagined in siblings. and she and lily were the best of friends, rarely saw them apart in school." he spoke gently, noticing harry's shift in demeanor. he looked sadder, like this was another thing he'd never get to experience.

"what's...what's her name?" harry asked quietly.

sirius felt his heart break more. it was saddening, knowing you would've loved to see harry now, and he didn't even know your name.

"y/n. y/n potter. your dad would call her n/n. she..." he hesitated for a moment, wondering if it was right to say this, but he wanted harry to know her, the way james and lily and you would've wanted. "she was the love of my life. in fact, we were even going to get married. after the war."

the memory felt bittersweet. he remembered proposing, at home, with just the two of you. you were ecstatic, blubbering 'yes' over and over. he remembered the way you kissed him, like it was the last thing you'd ever do. he remembered james crying tears of joy and sadness the next day as he realized his little sister was getting married, but he knew she was in good hands. he remembered you and lily rambling on and on about a small bachelorette party. even when things were chaotic and scary, you always found a way to lighten the situation. to make everyone feel safe.

to make him feel safe.

"what happened to her?" harry asked, finally looking up at sirius with a broken look. just the way sirius talked about you, harry knew how important you had to have been to everyone, but you and him would never get to meet. not in this lifetime anyway.

sirius swallowed the lump in his throat. while it hurt to mention, he knew you'd want harry to know. you'd want harry to find the good in the situation. in your situation.

"she died trying to protect your father...she was on a mission with him. the two potters, they were the dynamic duo. more than your dad and i honestly. a deatheater was trying to get away, and james wouldn't let him, so the deatheater shot a horrible curse at him. but your aunt, a brave woman she was, she jumped in front of james. it injured her badly, and she didn't make it, but she did it because you were going to be born soon. and she wanted you to have your father. even if it meant her dying. it's why your middle name is james, she's the one who suggested it, before she. . ."

harry felt a pressure in his chest, almost as if he wanted to cry. he didn't understand why he was so emotional over you, he hadn't ever met you. but it felt like he had. you sacrificed yourself for his dad. that was one of the bravest things he had ever heard.

"she sounds amazing." harry finally said, ignoring the pressure. sirius looked at the picture, his eyes fixated on you.

"she was."

#james potter #sirius black #sirius black x reader #sirius black x you #peter pettigrew #lily evans #lily potter #harry potter #professor sprout

[twelvemonkeyswere]

I re-read Good Omens via audiobook and I just collected my favorite details

"Crowley rather liked people" is a quote I still love so much. Even though he is a demon with the job of making people upset each other, he likes humans. The contrast between what they make him do and how he experiences Earth.

That scene with the ducks where Crowley almost drowns a duck and Aziraphale is like "I say, my dear" and Crowley is like "Oh yes I forgot myself" and allows the duck to return to the surface. Crowley is usually very polite about the most unhinged things which I just find endearing

All the times Aziraphale calls Crowley "dear boy"

The fact Aziraphale has "exquisitely manicured" hands lmao. I like to think he does go to the manicurist, same as he has a proper barber in the show

Aziraphale blushes sometimes and often gives mean looks to customers to push them out of shop

I like the on-going theme in the Good Omens universe of wanting to build a better world for loved ones, but how that drive, when taken to an extreme, is self destructive. Adam says he'll make the earth good for the Them, and will make sure the Them will be protected and happy in it. But the Them don't want it, they understand Adam is acting out and is not thinking things through. There is no point in trying to possess something and bend it to will forcefully. It wouldn't be good. It wouldn't be of free will. It would make them just another of his whims and no one, either the Them or Adam, actually want that

Aziraphale thinks Crowley is a creature of God when you "get right down to it", which is a thought both meaner and kinder than he realizes

Crowley is described to have "a voice so laid-back you could lay a carpet on it"and it's my most favorite thing ever lmaooo

"You're seducing women here!" /"I think perhaps you got the wrong shop" is always a brilliant line

Even though everything in the Bently turns into Queen's Greatest Hits, I love that Crowley actually loves music, and keeps his collection of records highly organized

Also love the fact that Crowley keeps his apartment orderly, though that's probably in big part because he doesn't really live there

I do appreciate that Crowley sleeps because he wants to, not because he needs to. Truly a relatable guy.

There's a big HOLY SHIT moment in the audiobook - the speech the American evangelist gives about the apocalypse. It's fucking incredible. The actor is amazing, delivering fire and brimstone and absolute hatred and certainty until Aziraphale pops inside of him.

Death really is Azrael, literally the angel of death

Aziraphale comes up with the solution at the end but ONLY because of Crowley, who challenged Aziraphale about the difference between the great plan and ineffable plan at the very beginning of the book

There are many moments where both Crowley and Aziraphale are thought to be a gay couple, but it really made me laugh that they are at the end of the world, telling each other it's been a pleasure to know each other all this time, and then Shadwell interrupts to call them "Nancy Boys"

Everyone in the Good Omens fandom is right, I do love that in the book, the wings of demons and angels are the same color

Crowley thinks the biggest battle will be heaven and hell vs humanity. This has got me thinking a lot. I figure this is because at some point humanity will rebel against any divine intervention, once we figure out that heaven and hell have been playing dice with us. But we'll see.

It does warm my heart that the story begins and ends with a garden and with the eating of the apple - Adam doesn't know why the old man hates people touching his apples so much, but the world would be a lot less interesting if he didn't. It's a fitting end for a fitting beginning.

#good omens #wendy reads #aziraphale #anthony j crowley #good omens 2

[deceitfuldevout]

A Woman Like You

Tommy Shelby x WOC!Reader

Word Count: +1,215

Warning(s): Angst, Sexist remarks, Societal pressure, Sterotypes.

Author's note(s): I've recently been using writing as a form of therapy. This goes to all the ladies that can relate.

You've fallen head over heels for Tommy Shelby, but now you're questioning if his intentions were sincere or not.

GIF by nofckingfighting

You made the mistake of falling in love. You should've seen the signs sooner. You started working at the Garrison as a bar maid with Grace, eventually moving up to being their sole entertainment. You were an exotic bird who had caught to wandering eyes of drunken Englishmen. Some folks would say you had these men in a trance, with your rare features and seductive mannerisms. Some even say you're a witch. But there was only one person who saw you for you. Tommy Shelby.

It was refreshing, being seen as a soft, delicate thing. His demeanor would shift when talking to you. He's much kinder to you that with any of his men. That was until another, prettier face had caught his eye. You of all people knew the truth: Tommy Shelby would never love you. Instead he'd fallen for your coworker Grace. She's everything you weren't. That may have been the reason why. Of course, you should've seen the signs. How he'd look at her with such tenderness.

Eventually his entire personality completely changed with you. Perhaps they were his true colors. After her death, things went south. Tommy returned to you, but only for physical intimacy. He was rough, unapologetic, and at time, downright cruel. He hadn't spoke to you like a lady, with basic respect. It almost hurt knowing men will never speak to you with kind remarks. As soon as you found a better option, you let him know right away. When you close the pub for the last time, Tommy was there. It was strange, having an Englishman waste his previous time on foreign blood.

You turn around to find Tommy sitting on a barstool, not paying him mind. Then something strange happened. He isn't usually this tender, not even in private. So why on earth was he telling you to stay? After every humiliating thing he'd put you through. How Tommy would shimmy you off his arm in front of his business associates. It only got worse when he'd flirt with women right in front of you, then ask for a fuck because it was convenient. Perhaps it was the liquid courage, maybe even the hormones that made you tear up with anger. But for some reason, you wanted to let him know he hurt you, "Enough, Tom, you need to stop doing this,"

He tilts his head up, genuinely surprised that you'd spoken up. His eyelids are hooded, "If you've got something to say..." he lights up a cigarette, "...say it now," how predictable. Tommy's cruelty had no limits. You were tired of being his little plaything, "I deserve better than this, better than you," letting him know how you truly felt, "You're fucking selfish, you know that?" tears already streaming down both cheeks, "You could've told me you were seeing other women, Tom," your vision blurs. Tommy objected, "You knew who I was when you met me--"

"Yeah, yeah I thought I did, until you decided to to make an acceptation with that blonde whore!" you knew what it would take to get his blood boiling. You wanted to hurt him the same way he hurt you, "I've wasted most of my life waiting for you to love me back, I wasted my good years on a man who wouldn't care if I bled out on the floor!" voice now shaking. You were filled with regret, pain, and anger.

He doesn't even know what the weight of his words did to you, "I know how you English men see women like us, we're always sexually desired but never loved, enough for a good fuck but not enough to make a wife," a chuckle escapes your tips at the thought of it. How could he marry someone like you? His name and status that he's worked so hard for would be tainted. Because who could ever love a woman like you? He had the audacity to roll his eyes, "You were entertainment, to bring customers in," someone pretty enough to keep company around.

"Everything, Tom, everything I've been doing, the act, because I am not allowed the luxury of being seen as innocent," after pouring your heart out, he still hadn't believed you, "Don't act like you haven't been seeing other men," he scoffs. You started to laugh at that remark. Had he really been that clueless? Tears stream down both cheeks. You wipe at them, smearing your mascara, "Now that's incredible," a deep grunt is trapped in the back of your throat, "You really think I'm a whore, don't you?" in an almost hushed tone, "Tommy, you were my first and only, do you really not believe me?" nothing felt worse than being betrayed by the one you trust the most, "All I ever wanted was for you to love me," since the beginning you were there. Even when he was mourning Grace you were there to keep him comfort. How foolish of you.

"Now you never told me--"

"I know who you pretend I am, who you want me to be," you roll your eyes, sniffling for a moment, "I'm not like you Tom, I can't pass, I can't change the color of my skin or features-- I will never be the white woman you've always wanted me to be, the kind of woman you'd keep on your arm without feeling embarrassed, why can't you just accept that?" a faint pause, "You told me...you told me she wasn't your type," barely a whisper, "Was everything a lie?" when he doesn't say anything, it was the only answer you needed. At that moment you snapped, "Please! Look at me!" you smack his arm, "Tommy!" when he does you're given only a cold stare.

Of course, it was never going to be someone like you. There are tears brimming your eyes again. It hurts, knowing that you will always be second best. Always an option but never the first, "At first I was confused, your infatuation with Grace didn't make sense, and now I see that it never mattered who she was," your breath hitches for a moment, "You were always going to choose someone like her..." now rambling about the obvious, "Prettier, blonder...whiter," you taunt.

Each word felt like venom on your tongue. You should've been used to the poison by now, "You don't know how long it took for me to trust a man again, after the pain I've been through--women like me, Tom, we don't have pretty blue eyes that get us what we want, not without a price," that remark made your skin crawl, "Always the seductress, never seen as pure," a dark chuckle erupts, taking up all sound from the bar. Tommy only stares back at you, with that same cold expression. You lean against the counter, looking down at the wood before returning to glance at him, "Did you ever love me?"

If there's one thing about Tommy, is that he would never lie to you, "No," a short, simple answer. You give him a soft, faint smile. Saddened by the loss but also relieved that you were free at last, "Thank you," with that you left, never returning to the Garrison again.

#tommy shelby #tommy shelby x reader #reader insert #tommy shelby x you #woc!reader #peaky blinders #cillian murphy #reader #fem!reader #peaky blinder fanfic #thomas shelby #peaky blinder imagine #peaky blinders x reader

[maximumkillshot]

"I Can't Lose You" Part 3

Warnings: This one is bad... Like bad bad. Uhm so please pay attention to these warnings. *Brings out a scroll with a solemn face.* Descriptions of Blood, Emergency medical procedure explainations, Shock, Grief, Chan gets shoved once, (IF YOU WANT NO SPOILERS AND KNOW YOU CAN HANDLE THE FIC CONTINUE) Child Loss, Descriptions of miscarriage.

Pairing: Bangchan x Reader

Characters: OC Doctor, Stray Kids, Reader

A/N: I know the cut is very high up but I needed to be sure that it wouldn't trigger someone would get triggered by the story. I am so sorry I am doing this to y'all. But here we are. Enjoy getting your heart ripped out? I guess. IF YOU WANT MORE TELL ME!

Also remember, this is a fan fic. All of the boys are so sweet IRL.

Stray Kids! Masterlist

Overall Masterlist

ALL WORK IS UNDER ME AND MY BLOG. DO NOT TRY TO REPUBLISH OR STEAL MY WORK, AS THAT IS COPYRIGHTED UNDER ME AND IS CONSIDERED COPYRIGHT INFRINGEMENT WHICH IS A PUNISHABLE OFFENSE. 

ANY WORK THAT YOU SEE ON OTHER SITES THAT ARE MY WORKS PLEASE NOTIFY ME IMMEDIATELY.

Previously:

You looked at Bin and Han and begged them to stay. Both of them looked at the doctor and said that whatever was happening, they weren't leaving. The doctor could see that you really needed them and as long as they were not in the way, it didn’t matter whether they were here or not. 

After the nerve block and the procedure, the doctor cleaned you up and draped a warm blanket over you, while the nurses hooked up a transfusion and closely monitored you. The doctor asked for Bin in the hall while Han went right back to your hand without the IV in it, so he could hold it properly.

Bin tried to ignore it during the procedure but the look that the doctor had on his face when he was doing the preliminary exam was haunting. Whatever he was called out here for… it wasn’t good.

NOW:

Once both Bin and the Doctor were in the hall and closed the sliding door separating you from the bustling main hallway, Bin got that feeling again. That sick feeling that something was wrong. The doctor looked like he was trying to stay professional. 

It was then that Bin noticed the doctor's wedding ring. He wondered to himself if the doctor was like Bin. So deep in love that seeing anyone else doesn’t just feel blasphemous, but it’s so out of the question it’s nauseating. The doctor began.

“Are you her husband?” He asked.

“No…” Bin replied. He could feel the bile rising in his throat with that one question. He immediately thought, If I was this never would’ve happened.

“Are you family?” The doctor looked at him.

“Yes. Are they okay?” Bin looked at the doctor.

“She lost a lot of blood, through something called a hemorrhage. It’s a rare complication especially this early on. She wouldn’t have made it if this happened at home. But it’s under control now.” the doctor said. He seemed to be trying to be as sympathetic as possible, making the next question sting more.

“Okay, and the baby?” Bin asked as he was trying to hold on to the possibility, some shred of hope that you and the baby were okay. He didn’t want the answer to be…

“I’m sorry.” The doctor slowly shook his head as he bowed his head slightly. The doctor looked guilty, like this was the worst part of his job, not being able to save someone. 

“How? Why?” Bin asked as it felt like his heart twisted. He didn’t know how you were going to get through this. He knew you too well. He knew that the pain you were about to feel, the emotional pain, would spell your demise... Bin couldn’t wouldn’t let that happen. 

“There is a cause-and-effect relationship that stress, extreme traumatic stress, like what you described, can cause a mis--” “Please don’t finish that word.” Bin pleaded with tears in his eyes. That word. He’s never hated a word in his life, until now. A word like that, even the word Death is kinder. To die you need to have lived in the first place, breathe air, feel emotions, like happiness, fear, love… None of those things happened for your child, through no fault of their mother. The same woman he’s staring at, the very same woman he always stared at. 

“The fact that she went through the shock as well as the prolonged stress after that shock, and didn’t have any previous symptoms of that happening prior to that, rules out all of the other options.” he paused and looked at his ring. Bin could tell what he was thinking, the doctor’s jaw tight, I could never dream of doing that, then continued, “You know her better than I do. Will she need something to calm her down?”

“Yes… but I don’t think she’ll accept it.” Bin looked back at you and Han. You looked so out of it. Like you were and were not there simultaneously. He has never seen you like this. From what he could see it looked like Han was doing his best to distract you. He was playing with your fingers as he joked. 

It was convincing enough to relax you, but Bin knew better. His eyes are always so expressive, if he's genuinely relaxed, his eyes show it. Bin could tell that Han was many things at this point in time, and worry free was not one of them. 

“Would you like to tell her?” the doctor asked. That question made Bin think a little bit. If he did tell you, he didn't know if you'd believe him. It's easier to ignore reality when the person breaking the news isn't a doctor. You'd accept it if it came from the doctor. 

“She’ll believe it if you say it… Just have the medicine on standby. Also, what do we do to help her? What’s next?” He asked.

“Well like I said her bleeding was extensive... I want to keep her for at least a full 24 hours, in case the bleeding starts again. I’ll also arrange for her to meet with the OBGYN during that time as well, to make sure we got all of the tissue out, that way there’s no chance of another hemorrhage or infection. Sounds like a plan?” The doctor asked.

“Yes… thank you." Bin took a deep breath before he went in, the doctor trailing behind him. 

The doctor closed the sliding door as Bin looked at you, then at Han briefly. He lowered the guardrail and made eye contact with Han, who mirrored his actions shortly after. 

“Mrs. Y/L/N” the doctor began but you cut him off. 

“My baby. Please tell me my baby’s okay… please,” the urgency written on your face. 

Han's eyes were set on Changbin. The minute you asked that question, Bin lowered his head, jaw tight, and tears were already beginning to form. When Bin looked at Han, he already knew. 

The doctor looked at you and said “I...I’m so sorry.” 

Your face showed nothing but confusion… you had just gotten the first ultrasound. You had it done a week ago. No, you saw your baby.

“Y/N” Bin asked gently. He saw the look on your face, and it killed him. Seeing your brain reach for any other outcome other than the one right in your face. He tucked some stray strands of hair behind your ear as he watched and waited for the understanding to reach your face, it didn’t.

“No, it can’t be, I just got the ultrasound done. No,” you replied.

Han and Bin looked at each other. Han's eyebrows dipped, as he processed and tried to brace for impact. Bin on the other hand, was willing himself to take a step back, knowing that you needed to hear this. It had to get through, that's the only way you could start healing. 

The doctor looked solemn as he said, “Mrs. Y/L/N I could tell that you were and still are contracting. The reason why your body is doing it, from what I can discern, is because your body went through extreme stress and emotional trauma, when that happens this early, your body rejects the pregnancy. That does not mean that this is your fault, it's the opposite. It’s completely out of your control.”

Bin could see the cogs turning in your brain as you slowly started shaking your head. Reality starting to seep in. Bin wished that you didn't have to go through this. That you got the fairytale ending without the heartbreak. That you didn't have to face the death of your own child. That pain, anguish, and suffering. 

The doctor continued, “There is an even rarer condition in which the body rejecting the pregnancy ends in a condition called a hemorrhage. It’s a technical term for excessive bleeding, in this case, it happened because your body is trying to expel the tissues in your cervix. Because it was so sudden, your cervix didn’t have time to open. When I examined you, you weren’t even at half a centimeter dilation, and all of that tissue was trying to be expelled. That was why I had to do that procedure, to get the tissue out so bleeding could be minimized. I’m so sorry… but you had a miscarriage.”

Once that word was said the scream that you let out was something that Han nor Bin have ever heard in their lives. It was soul-crushing. Both of them could hear your heart breaking, shattered on the ground. Bin and Han wanted nothing more than to pick up those pieces and fix it. They knew that they couldn't, this is a hurt they can't fix.

Han held you as you screamed, begged, pleaded… You looked at Bin. “Bin please, look at me. Please tell me it's not true… Please you don’t lie to me, I know you'll tell the truth pleeease.”

Bin looked at you, “I can’t tell you it’s not true. I’m sorry, I’m so so sorry.” The look of devastation on his face only sealed the fact. Bin has never lied to you so why would he start now? Especially with something as serious as whether or not you had a miscarriage. 

The look that painted his face, brows upturned as his eye contact was nothing short of empathetic. You could tell he wanted to lie. 

He wanted it to be false, that it was just some freak minor bleeding… that the baby was okay…he wanted it so badly… but you can't want something into existence. 

That realization hit you in a split second as the monitors that were connected to you, measuring vitals, started going off. You could feel nothing but pain. The involuntary gnawing, pulling pain. The blood, the cold from lack of blood in your body…The physical agony was nothing compared to what you felt in that split second. 

Your heart rate was literally too fast for you to register, pain surging through you as comprehension slammed into you like a tsunami. The baby is gone. Your baby. Your heart rate was through the roof and the doctor went to your IV.

“Y/N I’m going to give you something to calm you down okay? Your heart can’t take this stress, it’ll give out.” The doctor pushed the medication. 

“I want my baby…Bin I want my baby… Han please, my baby.” You sobbed as you held on to Han. 

All Bin could do was say, “I know you do, I’m so sorry. I’m here. I’m sorry.”

Han got on the gurney with you and cradled you. He cried with you. Prayed that it was just a nightmare. Han looked to Bin, only to find him trying to fight the tears that were falling down his face. Bin's soul was hurting for you, bargaining with whatever powers out there, to give himself up for you and your child. He knew it was irrational but if he could've, he would've. 

As soon as the medicine kicked in your breathing started to slow. You still whimpered and cringed as you felt your body bearing down, still shaking slightly and cold to the touch. Han draped his jacket over you, resting you against his chest, singing to you, to calm you. 

Every once in a while reality would crash into you again, you’d reach for Bin. You knew why you did, he was always there. He always understood you on a deeper level. Sometimes he knew what you needed when you didn’t even know you needed it. 

Eventually he pulled up a chair and laid his head on his forearm, hand in yours and close to his lips. as he gently rubbed circles into your hand with his thumb. As soon as you’d squeeze that hand he’d squeeze back as he nuzzled into your hand. His way of letting you know that yes, this is the reality, but he is still here. Wordlessly, endlessly, he’d be here. Sometimes you’d comb your fingers through his hair, the feeling somewhat comforting.  

You were so tired it went down to your bones. Sometimes only mustering a long blink at the pain. Eventually your vitals started looking good enough to transport.

The doctor came in with solemn reverence, like he was intruding on a funeral.“Y/N, we’re going to keep you overnight at the least, you’re going to have a visit from the OBGYN in the morning, okay? We have your bed ready so soon someone’s going to come to transport you.”

You just looked up at the doctor and nodded, “T-thank you” you hiccupped, “Hannie and Binnie are staying with me.”

“I’ve already put a cot in the room for them. I wish I could’ve done more,” he said with a sad smile. Bin got up and shook his hand, thanking him.

As soon as the transport nurses came to get you Bin said “I’ll see you in a bit. I just need to do something really quick.” you nodded and Bin kissed your forehead. He had to go back to the house. He didn’t know why immediately, just that he had to. 

He was on autopilot the entire ride to the house, except for the red lights.  He didn’t need to be strong at those lights. He’d scream where no one could hear him. Letting the pain out as images of you flashed. Smiling, then flashing to the scream you let out. Laughing, then sobbing in that hospital gurney. Cooking with him, to crying on Han. 

His screams were from mourning, pain, and frustration. He mourned the baby and you. The pain for you, the pain of realizing all of the things that you won’t experience. The frustration of not being able to see it before. To protect you, guard you. He wanted to rip something… someone… apart. There. That was the impulse that drove him back to the house.

At the last red light, he breathed deep, not even wanting to. He used whatever force that was left over as he screamed one last time. Everything he did, your child would never experience. Every scream echoed, redoubling the anguish he had for the both of you. Culminating into this, silence as he turned the corner to the house.

To his surprise, all of the other member’s cars were still at the house when he pulled up. When he parked, he looked at the clock on his dashboard, it was 2 a.m. Had it been 6 hours already? 

He felt his adrenaline kick up as he opened the door. He found everyone still wide awake, waiting for answers, but one look at Bin and they gathered what they needed.

Chan walked into the room from the kitchen and his jaw dropped upon seeing him.

“Bin…what happened?” Felix asked gently, hand’s slightly raised, as if approaching a wild animal. The aura on Bin wasn’t his aloof, goofy, self, it was the opposite; dark, threatening, dangerous. Bin’s eyes were trained on Chan, the closer he got, the more Bin felt his resolve slipping… Chan looked at him up and down, concern and horror written on his face. It was only then that Bin noticed he was covered in your blood.

His resolved snapped at that realization, upper lip ticking into a repressed snarl as he breathed “I’m… going to kill you.” He made a B-line to Chan. Felix, Minho, and Jeongin had to hold him back. 

Once Bin realized he couldn’t get to Chan, he screamed, “Was it worth it?! HUH?!!” His veins were popping out under his skin as he struggled to get free, “Was it?! Tell me! You hurt and nearly killed the only person I’ve ever loved. She’s dead inside now, all thanks to you!” More flashes accompanied that sentence, him picking you up and watching you go limp, eyes fluttering.

Felix looked at Bin and said, “What?... Hyung..” Felix's voice trailed off, trying to process what he heard. Felix knew that if he heard Bin correctly…he couldn’t even complete that thought.

Bin’s eyes snapped to Felix and he relaxed to the point where all three let go.

“The doctor said that because of the severe stress and emotional trauma she endured her body rejected the pregnancy.” He bum-rushed Chan and slammed him against the wall, while everyone was either in shock or processing. Felix was the first and only one to try to get Bin off Chan. Changbin was just too strong for the younger man, he ignored Felix as he tried wordlessly to pry Bin away from Chan. 

Bin continued staring into Chan's eyes, “The miscarriage was so sudden, in fact, that she hemorrhaged and almost bled to death because her cervix couldn’t open on its own in time. They had to scrape the tissue out just to stop it from killing her! And she looked at me to see if it was really true because I don’t LIE to her. Then they had to sedate her because her heart was going to give out when she realized that it was true.”

At this point Bin tightened his grip on Chan, “You are lucky that she asked for me to stay with her… If not I would kill you, right here. You are going to stay AWAY until or even IF she ever wants to see you again. I mean it Chan, if you come near her, I will end you. It’s not a threat, it’s a promise.” With that, he dropped Chan and went to the washroom. He washed off as much blood as he could and went to his room to change into spare clothes. He wanted to destroy everything in his room. His keepsakes, his picture frames of the boys all together. There was only one picture frame that he did smash to dust before he left his room… the one of himself and Chan, on Chan’s wedding day. He picked up his bloody clothes, stalked back out to Chan, and threw the clothing at him. 

He was shaking with rage as he said, “To YOU… this could’ve been a game or a thrill, fucking with her heart. But THAT!” he pointed to the clothing, “that is the reality. A child is dead, your child and it almost killed Y/N too. Next time you want to contact her, look at what you did to both of them while you do it.”

Before Chan could say anything Bin was slamming the door shut behind him with such force that the wall itself vibrated. Right as he made it to his car Felix ran to him. “Can I go with you?” he asked.

“I’m not leaving the hospital for the whole night, you know that, right?” 

Felix nodded and got into the passenger seat. The whole ride over Felix couldn’t help but to stare at Bin. He has never seen him like this. So enraged that he was three seconds away from crushing Chris’ windpipe. 

He also noted how Bin didn’t seem to know that he was covered in blood until Chris looked at him. Even now he could see Bin’s grip on the steering wheel was so strong his knuckles were white. He didn’t know exactly what happened in those four hours they weren’t given updates, and Felix knows just by seeing Bin, he never wants to find out. 

As soon as Bin entered your hospital room he heard you say “Binnie?”

Honestly, he could melt every time you call him that.

“I’m back…” he chuckled slightly… “And I brought some sunshine with me…”

The minute he looked into your eyes, you smiled just a little. That was progress. He kissed your forehead as Felix looked you over. 

Felix is like your little brother, so the minute you saw him and he saw you, you both started crying. Han got off the bed knowing Lix would want to be with you for a bit, for both of your sakes. 

This gave Han and Bin time to talk out in the hall.

“How’re her contractions?” Bin asked.

“They’re slower but still strong. The doctor says that it’ll be strong for at least 5 to 10 hours.” Han reported.

“And you? How’re you doing?” Bin asked. He knows Han has anxiety, seeing all of this and being as strong as he’s been is not easy. 

“I’m… Out of all people, Bin.” Han shook his head. Han has known Chan the longest and he would’ve never expected him to do this. 

“I know”

“Please tell me you didn’t hit him.” Han said.

“Nah… She needs me more than I need to beat him to a pulp… I don’t think he’ll be bothering her anymore though.” That’s at least what Bin hopes. Everything is so raw. A little over 8 hours before this you were at a restaurant to celebrate your 3rd anniversary. Now everything was all wrong, a nightmare incarnate and no one can wake up from reality. 

“Hyung… She can’t go back to that house.” Han said as he took a deep breath.

“I know. All I know is that we'll do what she’s comfortable with.”

“Agreed…Bin?” Han asked.

“Yeah?”

“It should’ve been you with her. From the beginning.” Han looked to Bin, a look of understanding and empathy for Bin. Han could always see the way Bin looked at you when no one else was looking. Everything you said would be committed to his memory, even the smallest things like which brand of sesame oil you like best for your bulgogi marinade. 

“I know. That doesn’t mean that I can’t be here for her from now on.”

Han just smiled and both of them went back into the room. 

********************************************************************

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#stray kids fanfic #stray kids imagines #stray kids x reader #stray kids angst #bang chan x reader #im not okay #this one drained me #Trying to write about this is hard #I know it needs to be said though #keep tissues close and blankets closer #skz angst #skz fanfic #skz imagines #skz #bangchan #changbin #han #for the love of comfort #Descriptions of Blood #Emergency medical procedure explainations #Shock #Grief #Chan gets shoved once #Child Loss #Descriptions of miscarriage.