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atlafan · 5 months

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1963 - Part 1

a/n: I have been dying to share this with yall and I'm so excited to finally be doing that. As per usual, this is the only part that will be posted here on Tumblr.All other parts will be posted on Patreon. In fact, Part 2 is already up! And Part 3 will be posted Friday.

Please consider joining my Patreon. It's only $5 a month, and it charges you the following month on the date you joined. So, if you signed up today, you wouldn't get charged again until January 10th. I post 2-4 times per month. If anything is under 10K words, that's usually when I'll post more. I depend on this extra income to help pay bills for essentials. The community there is also incredible and I write and post some of my nastiest smut on there, so if that's what you're looking for, you'll get it!

Warnings: mentions of infertility

Words: 3.8K

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“Every month I keep hoping I’ll have different news for you two,” Doctor Simmons sighed, “unfortunately, I have the same news. Beverly still isn’t with child.”

“We’ve been trying for five months, we’ve been doing everything you’ve said. Beverly drinks the teas, she lays with her legs up after we’re done, I don’t know what else we can do.” Robert was exasperated at this point. He was squeezing his wife’s hand, desperately trying not to let any tears escape his eye ducts.

“You two have exhausted all natural remedies, so I think it’s time we consider IVF.”

Beverly’s eyes widened, and she squeezed Robert’s hand back. She looked at him, panicked.

“Beverly is terribly afraid of needles.”

“You don’t need to decide on anything right now. Take these pamphlets and look over the information. If you two want to have a baby of your own, then this may be the next step.”

“We’ll look it over and have an answer by our next appointment.”

Robert and Beverly are silent on the drive home from the doctor’s office. They’re silent on their way back into their home. Beverly goes right to the kitchen to get started on dinner. Robert comes up next to her and puts her hand over hers.

“We should read the literature on IVF.” He said.

“I have friends who have done it, and all it has done is make their hormones crazy, and not in a fun way. I really don’t want to, Robert. I’ve done everything else, please don’t make me do this.”

“It feels like sometimes I’m the only one who wants to have a baby.”

“How could you say something like that to me? If I’m infertile-“

“You’re not, though. Doctor Simmons has run every type of blood test on you.”

“I know, I was there when the nurse was drawing it after you accused me of secretly taking birth control pills.”

“Well, with how apprehensive you were about having your diaphragm removed, I had to make sure you weren’t doing any self-sabotage.”

“Maybe I’m not getting pregnant because my body knows you don’t trust me.”

“I do trust you, you just weren’t exactly thrilled to start trying.”

“You sprung it on me, I was surprised. We never really discussed having kids before we got married.”

“Sweetheart, why would two people get married if not to have kids?” He chuckled.

“That’s not why I married you. I married you because I love you and I want to be with you.”

“I love you and want to be with you too. But if I hadn’t wanted kids, we could have just shacked up in an apartment in the city. I bought us a house in the suburbs so you could keep house and raise our kids. You like being a housewife, you’ve told me as much.”

“I do. I like making your meals and keeping things tidy, but I also like my free time. I like to go have brunch with the other ladies, and I like going to the library to check out new film analysis journals, and I like being able to go to the movies in the middle of the day. Having a baby means I can’t do those things anymore. At least, not until it’s old enough to go to school. That’s five solid years I’d be putting on hold. And within that five years, I could have at least two more kids. So, now I’m thirty-one with three kids under the age of five, and oh yeah, I’ll still be expected to keep the house clean and cook all your meals and pleasure you even though everything between my legs will feel like sandpaper.”

Robert eyes his wife, then puckers his lips in thought. “Is that how you’ve really been feeling? You haven’t said a word.”

“I didn’t want to disappoint you. You’re not easy to talk to these days. Every time I reach for my clip-belt for my sanitary napkins, I can see you watching with such sadness in your eyes. Motherhood is scary. My friends tell me these horror stories about childbirth. Their husbands barely take a week off from work to be home with them and the baby. So, we’re expected to push these kids out, then get up the next day and get back to our usual routines.”

“Beverly, you’re worried about things women have been doing since the beginning of time. Don’t be such a child. The fear of needles I can understand, but the fear of being a mother makes no sense. I know you and your mother have a strained relationship, but that doesn’t mean history will repeat itself.” He placed his hands on her shoulders. “If we’re not pregnant by our next appointment with Doctor Simmons, then I would like us to start IVF. Have I made myself clear?”

“Yes, dear.”

“Good.” He looked at the ingredients on the counter and grimaced. “I don’t want meatloaf tonight, make something else instead.”

“Yes, dear.”

“I’m gonna go to my office, have a beer, and listen to the ball game. Let me know when dinner is on the table.”

“Yes, dear.”

Robert smiled, grabbed a beer out of the fridge, and walked out of the kitchen. Beverly took a deep breath and rummaged through her cabinets to see what else she could possibly whip up for dinner. It needs to be something heavy enough that Robert won’t feel like making love before bed. Beverly doesn’t have it in her to put on a performance tonight.

Most people get married to have kids. Beverly married Robert because she loved him. He wanted to take care of her. But when the honeymoon phase ended, and he stopped saying thank you to her for all of the things she did to take care of him, she grew resentful. She never let on about it. Robert didn’t need to know how she really felt. Opening up the way she did the day prior wasn’t normal. Things had been good between them for a long time. Beverly didn’t mind stepping into the role of a stay-at-home wife. She was college educated, but it wasn’t like she’d ever be able to carry a position in the profession of her desire. And since she didn’t want to be a schoolteacher or a nurse, Robert asked her to stay home to tend to the house he had bought for them.

At twenty-three, she really hadn’t minded. They met in college, as so many young couples do, and it was love at first sight. Their courtship was disgustingly romantic, and their wedding was a dream come true. The honeymoon phase was so sickly sweet. Beverly enjoyed making breakfast for Robert before he left for work. She enjoyed sending him on his way. She had the whole day to herself. She’d tend to her various gardens, and she’d make sure the house was clean. She’d meet up with friends for brunch. She did everything a good wife was supposed to do.

At twenty-six, Beverly feels like she’s on autopilot. She can’t help but wonder if the reason why older couples have designated sex nights is because the wives must need the six days in between to psych themselves up. She also can’t help but wonder if this is why so many older couples opt for twin beds that can be pushed together or pulled apart.

And it’s not that Beverly doesn’t want kids, she thinks it could be fun, but she’s petrified of essentially raising a child by herself. Robert will stroll in from work, bounce the baby on his knee for all of two minutes, and call it a night. She’s scared for all the reasons she tried to explain the day prior. Robert also didn’t give Beverly a choice five months ago…

“I was thinking of maybe enrolling in graduate school.” Beverly brought up one morning over breakfast. Robert had nearly choked on his toast. “I know what you’re thinking, but you wouldn’t have to pay for a thing. They have stipends for students. I could teach while I learn.”

“I thought you didn’t want to teach.”

“I didn’t want to teach children, but something about having high level discussions with college students makes teaching sound like fun. I miss being in school.”

“What’s the point of a graduate degree in film and media? It’s not like you can do anything with it.”

“A graduate degree could lead to a doctorate, and I could keep teaching. I know female professors are few and far between, especially in the world of film, but it is possible.”

“So, you want to be a career woman, is that what you’re saying?”

“Not exactly. Classes wouldn’t take up all my time. I’d still be able to cook and clean and do everything I’m doing now. Except now when I go to the library, I’ll be doing schoolwork instead of reading for leisure.”

“Seems like you have it all figured out already.”

“Well, I wanted to show you I had thought it all through, that I was serious. You got your graduate degree. If you hadn’t, we never would have met.”

“Exactly. What if some older professor comes on to you? You’d have no way to protect yourself.”

“Oh, Robert, I’ve gone this long without something horrible happening to me on a college campus, I think I’d be fine. Besides, all I’d need to do is show off the lovely rings on my finger.” She grinned. “No one would mess with a married woman whose husband can afford a diamond like this.”

“Did you already sign up for a course?”

“Of course not. I wanted to speak with you first.”

“Good.” He finished his breakfast. “Let me think on it.”

“Alright. Anything in particular you want for dinner tonight?”

“Actually, I was thinking we could go out tonight. I wanted to take you somewhere nice.”

“Oh? For what?”

“Does a husband need a reason to treat his wife to a romantic evening?”

“No.” She giggled. “I’m just excited at the prospect of a spontaneous date night. I’ll pick out a dress I haven’t worn in a while, so it feels like new.”

“I think that’s a great idea.” He stood and kissed the top of her head. “I’ll call you before I leave work, so you’ll know when to expect me.”

“Okay, have a good day, dear.”

Beverly was excited. A night out was a positive sign. Robert wouldn’t take her out just to give her bad news. He was going to say yes to her going back to school.

The restaurant Robert took Beverly to was ritzy. He danced with her, ordered an expensive bottle of wine, and kissed on her shoulder and neck while he sat next to her in their booth. That sickly sweet feeling Beverly thought might be gone was sparking again. When the cheesecake came out, they fed each other bites. It was adorable.

“Are you having a good time tonight?” He asked.

“Yes, this has been such a wonderful evening. Thank you for taking me here.”

“You’re welcome, Bev.” He put his hand over hers and gave it a squeeze. “I’ve been thinking about a lot of things lately, and our conversation this morning was the kick in the pants I needed, so I’m really glad you brought up graduate school.”

“I’m glad it was a positive conversation.” She smiled. “What’s been on your mind?”

“I think it’s time we started trying for a baby.” All of the color drained from Beverly’s face, but her smile never wavered. She couldn’t let on how disappointed she was. “You’re clearly bored with the amount of free time on your hands. I know school seemed like a fun thing to do to pass the time, but I think we’ve waited long enough. We’ll be married almost four years soon, I think we know what we’re doing in the bedroom by now. So, next week, I’m taking you to the doctor to have your diaphragm removed-“

“You called my doctor about something like that?”

“I know it’s a bit awkward, but it’s not a secret that you have one. I went with you when you got it, I should be with you when you have it taken out.”

“Robert…I don’t like that it feels like you’re not giving me a choice. What if I’m not ready?”

“It’s not that you don’t have a choice, I’m just stating that it’s time. You take care of me just fine, you’ll be a great mother. This is what I would rather you do than go back to school. Besides, think of the fun we’ll have while we’re working at it. I got excited at work today thinking about it. I was hoping tonight could be a test run.” He wiggled his eyebrows. “I love you so much, Bev, I wanna turn that love into a physical being.”

“Yeah, um, that makes perfect sense. Let’s…let’s make a baby.”

“Really?” He asked, elated.

“Yes, dear.”

Robert kissed his wife. He kissed her in the car. He kissed her on the way into their home, up the stairs, and into their bedroom. He made love to his wife, then called it a night.

After getting her diaphragm removed, they waited until after her next period was done to start trying. This gave Beverly plenty of time to figure out how she could avoid pregnancy. She needed to keep some semblance of control over her own body. Robert wasn’t going to tell her when she was ready. She could decide that on her own.

Lysol douching didn’t work, she knew this. Her sister told her as much. Some of her friends offered her their birth control pills, but she knew they’d show up on a blood test, which Robert made sure she had after the second month of her still not having gotten pregnant. Beverly may have studied film, but she was an excellent student in biology and chemistry as well. She knew how condoms worked. They were coated in spermicides. She just needed to figure out how to coat her vagina with it. She bought condoms and squeezed all of the lubricant and spermicide off them and got a good amount into a bottle. She mixed it with olive oil, what ancient Greeks used to use, and douched with that before having sex with Robert. She knew it would be a long shot if it worked, but she had to try.

When the third month came along, and she still wasn’t pregnant, she took solace is knowing her little concoction was working. And because Robert never went down on her, he’d never smell or taste a thing. When he used his fingers, he just thought she was extra wet, which made him feel proud of himself.

She was perfectly content with her plans until the topic of IVF came up. Even the harshest of solutions couldn’t stand up to IVF injections. She never felt bad for lying to Robert because she didn’t like that he had become so controlling, but she also didn’t think she’d be doing this for so long. The thought of her giving her body up didn’t sound any more appealing five months later.

What was she going to do?

“I really think that one is gonna be a winner.” Robert sighed happily as he relaxed into the bed, looking over at Beverly as she lay with her legs in the air. “I’m glad we waited a couple of days in between, feels like my boys swam stronger.”

“Yes, dear.” Beverly closed her eyes and tried to breathe steadily, counting down the minutes until she could go use the bathroom and cleanse herself.

“I had an idea today. I really want to spare you from having to be injected with needles. I’m a good husband, and good husbands protect their wives. So, since we have about five weeks until our next appointment, I thought we could try one last natural method.”

“I’m listening.” She turned her head to look at him, intrigued.

“I overheard some ladies talking in the break room this morning. It’s the one good thing about having so many female secretaries. Anyways, they happened to be discussing various issues with conceiving. One of them said they had a friend who got pregnant the second she and her husband stopped focusing so much on it. The wife threw herself into different projects, and a month or so later, she was pregnant.”

“Wait.” She sat up on her elbows. “Are you saying I can enroll in a graduate course after all?”

“What, no.” He laughed. “No, I was thinking we could finally redo the patio and have that pool you’ve wanted put in. You’ve been talking about wanting to host more parties for our friends. You always do so well with the workers when we have something done here, and you love gardening. I think you’d really enjoy overseeing a landscaping project.”

“Let me get this straight: you would rather pay thousands of dollars to have our backyard redone, than pay a couple of hundred for me to enroll in a course?”

“I think school would be too stressful. If you’re stressed, then you definitely won’t conceive. Overseeing a project that puts you outside in the sun will be a win-win. Not to mention an old friend of mine is willing to give us a deal on the work.”

“You have a friend that’s a landscaper?”

“Yeah, this guy from my old neighborhood took over his father’s business. He said he could swing by Saturday to take a look at things.”

“It sounds like you’ve already decided that this is what we’re doing.”

“That’s because I have.” He grinned proudly. “Bev, when we got married, I promised to take care of you. This is me taking care of you. Not all husbands would do something like this for their wives. You could at least pretend to be grateful.”

“I am grateful, I’m sorry if my tone suggested otherwise. What time Saturday is he coming over?”

“That I left up to you. I didn’t know if you had any errands or plans with the ladies.”

“Oh.” Well, at least he was trying to be considerate. “Maybe around three? That would give me time to pick up the dry cleaning and stop at the market.”

“Three is perfect. I’ll give him a call tomorrow to let him know.” He looked down at his watch. “You should be good to use the bathroom now.”

“Yes, dear.” Beverly lowers her legs and slings her robe on. Once she’s in the bathroom, she locks the door and flips on the fan. She rummages around in the back of the sink-cabinet until she finds her douching solution. She used some prior to having sex with her husband, but she likes to use it after for good measure. She bites into the heel of her palm as she cleanses herself. It tends to sting from time to time. When she’s done, she looks at herself in the mirror. She knows she can’t keep doing this to herself. She just doesn’t know what else to do.

Beverly loves her weekend clothes. There’s something so freeing about slipping on a pair of high-waist capris, a sleeveless button-up that ties in the front, and a pair of flats. She usually gardens after running her errands, and this is what she typically wears to garden. Robert hates it when Beverly wears pants, or anything form fitting, in public. Why should anyone else be privy to how round her bum is, or how full her thighs are? She’s got a body like Marilyn’s, and that’s something he prefers to keep under wraps.

When the landscaping van pulls up out front, Beverly is in the front yard, planting and mulching. She has the radio going, so she doesn’t pay any mind to the sound of an engine turning off. The man in the landscaping van tilted his sunglasses down the bridge of his nose, getting a better glimpse of Beverly. Robert starts walking over, so the man gets out of his van, rounding it to meet his old friend.

“Harry.” Robert smiled and shook the man’s, Harry, hand. “Can you believe it? Got a nice house in a suburb just like the one we grew up in.”

“I never doubted you’d get everything you wanted.” Harry smiled back.

“Seems like the Navy treated you well.”

“Yeah, I can’t complain too much. I didn’t get blown up or lose a limb.”

“And now you own your father’s business. Sorry for your loss, by the way. That’s the drawback of inheritance.”

“Yep. You working for your father?”

“Yes, and proud of it. I’ve got an office with a view, and I can afford to live more than comfortably. Got a beautiful wife, too.” Robert looked around. “Beverly, c’mere!” Beverly stood and dusted off her trousers before making her way over to the two men. “Harry, this is my Beverly.” He put his arm around his wife’s shoulders.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you, Mrs. Clark.”

“Likewise, Mr…”

“Styles.” He points behind him with his thumb. “Of Styles Landscaping.”

“Right, of course.”

“Your husband told me you were hoping to have some work done in the backyard.”

“Yes, we’d like the patio redone and to have a pool put in, if possible.”

“Let’s show Harry to the back.” Robert said as he led his wife to the back. Harry followed close behind.

As Beverly observes Harry observing her yard, she can’t help but feel confused. How is this man a friend of Robert’s? Harry’s t-shirt is stretched tight over his chest, not to mention how beefy and muscular his biceps are. His arms are also littered with tattoos.

It takes about twenty minutes for Harry to look around, take some measurements, and get a feel for the land.

“Alright, I can come back on Tuesday with some different mockups of what can be done back here. I can bring my portfolio too, so you can look at some of my past projects. Does Tuesday work for you, Mrs. Clark? I’m assuming you’ll be the one home.”

“Yes, the early afternoon works for me, Mr. Styles.”

“Perfect.” Robert clapped his hands. “H, come in for a bit. We can have a couple beers and catch up while Bev does her gardening out front.”

“Sounds good to me.” Harry nodded, and Robert started to make his way inside. For a split second, Harry tilted his sunglasses down to look at Beverly. “It was nice meeting, Mrs. Clark.” He winked and smirked before catching up with Robert.

Beverly felt her cheeks heat up. She turned and watched Harry walk into her home. Why did he wink at her like that? And why did it make her feel like she just got a B-12 shot?

She shook it off and made her way out front. Gardening will help her clear her head. She’s a married woman. A friend of Robert’s wouldn’t flirt with a married woman…would he?

#harry styles imagine #harry styles fic #harry styles smut #harry styles fluff #harry styles x reader #harry styles y/n #harry styles x y/n #harry styles fanfic #harry styles #harry styles x oc #harry styles au #harry styles angst #harry styles one shot #harry styles blurb #harry styles fic rec #1963

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codfanficedits · 7 months

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One fucking mistake - Part ten - Ending Two.

Pairing: Simon 'Ghost' Riley x fem!Reader - She/her pronouns being used

Summary: Simon lost you after making a mistake on a mission.

Wordcount: 2037| Rating: E (18+ only!)

Warnings: cussing, swearing, grieving, angst with comfort, conversation, mentioning of memoryloss

A/N: Part ten and ending two. Read this one if you don't love yourself. I made a different ending too. Link here

I didn't proofread and English isn't my native tongue, so please let me know if there are mistakes. Also my neighbours are renovating their house so I haven't slept properly in a while now :) I will also post a full version with both endings. AND this is my longest fic so far!! And this is my 50th post on here!

Part 1 ~ Part 2 ~ Part 3 ~ Part 4 ~ Part 5 ~ Part 6 ~ Part 7 ~ Part 8 ~ Ending One ~ AO3 Link

Your old teammates cheer when they see you, and you’re overwhelmed by the familiar feeling washing over you, all the successful mission you’ve celebrated with them, all the losses you have encountered and overcome with them. They’re your family and you’re so grateful to see them again.

But someone is missing.

Price drags him along, and your heart stops when you see him. Simon.

Your smile fading away when you see him holding hands with someone else, a woman you’ve never seen before. Fuck.

He has moved on and you can’t blame him. You’ve been gone for more than eight months, and you’re so, so, so proud that he has overcome this. You’re proud that he didn’t let himself rot away, give up on life. But by God, does it hurt.

His eyes widen, pupils dilate when he spots you, long strides to meet you as soon as possible and you can see his hand letting go of hers, but she holds on, even if that means that he kind of drags her along.

Eight.

Seven.

Six.

Five.

Four.

Three.

She finally let go off his hand.

Two.

One final steps and his lips crash on yours, kissing you with an intensity you’ve never felt from him before. His hands all over your face, fingers entangled in your hair, his lips hungry for a taste of you, a taste he thought was long forgotten, but he now remembers and so desperately craves. It’s a goddamn messy kiss, and it feels as if the both of you are fifteen again, and this is your first kiss ever, but you don’t mind, you would rather have fifteen million of these kisses, than never kiss him again.

Eventually he has to pull back, a reminder for the both of you to breathe. He presses his forehead against yours.

“I even washed the cat dishes.” A soft whisper and enough to break to ice, to make you smile again as you wrap your arms around him, the woman behind him catching your eyes. God, she looks miserable, but you can’t blame her.

Simon follows your gaze, letting go off you, almost as if he has been caught doing something bad. His throat feels dry as he looks from you to Sophie, he loves both these woman, but the way he loves them is different. The atmosphere in the air shifts, and a certain amount of awkwardness fills the air, the joy surrounding you dying down quick.

Price clears his throat. “I’m sure you all have a lot of catching up to do. The briefing rooms are empty.” Not a very subtle hint, but all three of you get it. Simon is the first to move, taking your hands in his, holding on tight, afraid he will lose you again if you slip between his fingers. As the three of you walk towards a briefing room you look towards your right, the woman next you has her head bowed down and you can see a mix of emotions on her face. You want to reach out, say something to her, but what can you possible say to her to make this easier?

The tension is thick in the air when you reach the briefing room. “Can I have a word with you, Simon?” Sophie asks, it is the first time you’ve heard her voice, and she sounds sweet. Simons eyes shift to you. “In private.” She adds, that same sweet voice now holding a sharp tone.

His eyes meet yours again, almost as if he is asking you for permission, and you nod. They both go into the briefing room next to the one you’re in, and you sit down on a chair, being as close as possible to the wall, you know you shouldn’t eaves drop, but you need to know what they are discussing.

“Listen.” It’s Simons voice. “I never thought this would happen, Sophie.”

Sophie.

It’s a lovely name, she seems lovely, the whole situation is just fucked.

“No one thought this would happen, but what matters is what you’re going to do, Simon.”

You perk up, ear pressed against the wall, hoping to God you can make out what he will answer. It stays quiet and all you can hear is your own heartbeat thumping in your ears.

And in the other room Simon doesn’t know what to do, what to say, he stares at the woman in front of him, knowing full well that the love of his life is sitting in the room next to them.

Truth be told, he had loved Sophie, he wouldn’t have been with here if he didn’t. But his love for Sophie always was paired with the loss of you, he knew he wouldn’t never loved her the way he loves her now if you never went on that mission with him. He knows that the love he felt for her was his heart trying to replace you.

“I..” But it is hard for him to say it, it is hard to break a person while only thirty minutes ago the both of them were on their way to meet his teammates.

“You’re choosing her?” Sophie’s voice is far from amused.

“Yes.” Simons begins, nervously fidgeting with his hands. “But you have to understand, it’s not an easy thing for me to do.”

“It’s not easy for you to do?” Sophie’s words are laced with venom, and you can understand why. You’re the ghost of his past, while she should have been the ghost of his future, and there you were, suddenly showing up, taking away the relationship she thought she had.

“Do you have ANY idea how this is for me?” Sophie continued. “I’ve BEEN there for you, Simon! I’ve sat with you while you cried about her, I’ve let you tell countless stories about her.”

“I know, and I’m so-“

“I’m not done yet.” The words are spat out. “I’ve been to her fucking empty grave! Asking for fucking permission to be with you! I’ve sat there, telling her how I’ll never replace her, but live alongside her fucking ghost. And now you just toss me to the side as a fucking used up doll?”

Simon is taken aback by the, for him, sudden outburst. He had been so caught up with his own healing process, his own grieving, that the thought of it weighing down other people never occurred to him. “You went to her grave?”

“Yes! I’ve learned how to fit myself inside her shadow, I’ve seen you look disappointed whenever I was a little late, or when I would kick out my shoes at the door, I’ve seen you compare me to her the whole goddamn time and this whole relationship I’ve been competing with someone we both thought was dead!”

“I didn’t knew you felt this way.”

“Because you never fucking asked, Simon, because it has always been about you and her and me, and never just about you and me.”

“That’s not true.” He protests. “Maybe in the beginning, but I’ve learned to love you for you.”

“Then why are you looking at her like that, huh?”

“Because.” Simon takes a deep breath, he knows he has to rip off the bandage, it isn’t fair for Sophie to continue this, he knows where his heart lies, and while it was with Sophie, the moment you came back into the picture, the floodgates within his heart had been opened and his love for you is pouring out. “Because it will always be her.”

“I don’t blame you Simon.” Sophie’s voice starts to crack. “But sometimes I wish we never met each other.”

“Don’t say that. You’re an amazing person, pretty, smart.”

“Oh cut the bullshit.” Sophie hisses. “I’m all that, yet I’m not enough for you to choose me. I helped you grieve over someone who would always be your number one choice. I had been warned by my friends and I so desperately wanted you to be different. But I guess you are just a simple man after all.”

And those words stung Simon, more than he would ever realise, he hated how much of a cliché he had become. Yes he had thought he was fully over you, and yes he had thought he could’ve moved on, but now that he had to choose between Sophie and you, it was clear as day who he loved more.

“I wish I could’ve been something more.” Sophie’s words are a soft whisper.

“And for someone else you will be.”

After that there is just silence, two ex-lovers looking at each other. One over the moon because his lost lover returned to him. The other heartbroken after she realised he never fully choose her.

“Do you want me to bring you home?” Simon asks, realizing he had been her ride.

“No. I’d rather walk.”

“Don’t be stubborn, let me either bring you home or pay for your cab.”

“I’ll fucking manage, Simon. I don’t need your pity after you took out my heart and stomped on it.”

Sophie is still pissed, but neither you or Simon can blame her for it, and part of you wished things could’ve been different, part of you wished you had died that day, that he could’ve fully moved on from you. But that part is small, tiny and crumbled up hiding in your brain as you feel guilty.

You can hear someone stomp past the door of the room you’re sitting in, and the door slowly creaks before you see Sophie. It’s an awkward silence, you’ve clearly been caught listening to them, and you can see the light reflecting the tears on her cheeks.

“No matter how mad I am at Simon.” Sophie begins, and you brace yourself for an outburst. “It isn’t your fault.”

You had expected her to be angry at you too, but she isn’t.

“I’m sorry.” You mutter. “You never deserved any of this.”

A soft smile breaks out on Sophie’s face. “I didn’t.” She agrees. “But I’ve learned some things about myself, and when the sadness is over that will be worth something.”

You smile back at her, in another life the two of you could’ve been friends, but not here, not in this life. “Thank you.”

“For what?”

“For keeping him sane.”

“It wasn’t easy.”

“He isn’t easy.”

Sophie laughs and a bit of the tension melts away between the two of you.

“Just.. Simon is a good guy, no matter how much I wanted to strangle him.” Sophie starts. “But he cares about you, a lot, more than he can ever care about himself or someone else. And you care that much about him too, I can see it in your eyes, in his eyes. It wasn’t a coincidence that the universe brought the two of you together.”

“Thank you.” Sophie’s words are warm, and you can see why Simon had loved her. “I hope you find your Simon.”

“I will. I might even hang out on the base a little longer and get myself a colonel or something.”

The both of you can’t help but chuckle at her comment.

“I hope life will treat you well.”

“I wish you the same.”

After that she turns around and walks away, and you can’t help but stare. Sophie had handled it better than you would’ve done, and you can’t help but admire her for that.

Simon pops his head through the open door. “I’m not easy?” He snickers.

“Don’t be like that.”

He steps into the briefing room, closing the door behind him. “You’re not mad?”

“For what?”

“For dating Sophie.”

“Well, I would be lying if I said that it didn’t tear my heart out when I saw you holding her hand.” You admit. “But I’ve always told you that I wanted you to move on in case I passed away earlier than you.”

“Fair, but I can’t help but feel as if I betrayed you.”

“You would’ve betrayed me if you would’ve let yourself rot away in bed.”

You can’t help but look up as he stands before you. “I’ve missed you.” He whispers as he leans closer.

“I’ve missed you too.” You murmur back before he presses his lips against yours.

62 notes · View notes

wandabear · 1 year

Text

COME UNDONE - WANDA MAXIMOFF X F!READER

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Summary: Wanda is a 32-year-old, a divorced mother who hasn’t opened herself up to the opportunity to love again. She met Y/N but the 7 year age difference made her feel guilty… until she end up being victim of Thanos’ snap while Y/N stayed. What if Wanda never joined the Avengers? Her parents left Sokovia when Wanda and Pietro were little, achieving the dream of living in USA.

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chapter 1 - chapter 2 - chapter 3 & 4 - chapter 5 - chapter 6 - chapter 7 - chapter 8 - Chapter 9 - Chapter 10 FINALE

Jules is portrayed by Adelaide Kane. Here.

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“You didn't see that coming?...”

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That voice. She could recognize that voice anywhere, that man who had been by her side since she was born.

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Pietro.

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Those teary green eyes, her red lips trembled. Pietro lay in front of her touching his chest, although the bullet wounds were all over his body. A trickle of blood fell from the corner of his mouth.

But his look was the worst, he watched her in a disturbing way.

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“Pietro…” Wanda whispered, taking a step forward but suddenly someone approached, blocking her way. A beautiful brunette. Oh, how much she adored that woman since the day Wanda met her. Now, she was looking at her like she felt sorry for her.

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“He was killed by Ultron, wasn't he?” Monica Rambeau asked, looking at her with sorrow while Pietro kept looking at her in the same creepy way. Her sister-in-law and her beloved brother, completely different from what she knew them.

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Wanda frowned and shook her head, starting to back away but suddenly another Pietro appeared behind her, making her jump.

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“I got shot like a chump in the street for no reason at all.” The second Pietro told her quite annoyed, the three of them looked at her as if she were something strange or foreign to that place.

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“You have everything under control, don't you?” Natasha's hoarse voice made her turn around. A gasp slipping away from her lips, Natasha's face was beaten up, she looked sad and defeated. Strangely she wore a black suit with a black widow logo, apparently she was a hero in another universe.

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But the worst thing was seeing the blood behind Nat’s head, the crimson blood. Wanda covered her mouth,, trying to silence the scream. Her best friend was in front of her, dying, but her gaze was still the same as the others.

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“This is not real, it is not real.” Wanda shook her head and repeated the following words to herself over and over again. “It's not my life. It’s not mine. It’s hers.”

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“That doesn't make it any better, does it?” They all said, the people she loved surrounded her and got closer, asking her why she let them die or why she abandoned them. Her children screaming ‘mom!’ as they crawled on the ground, slowly disappearing and turning to ashes.

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“You left me die in Sokovia.”

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“You left me die in Westview.”

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“You left me die in Vormir.”

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“No! I didn’t do it! It wasn’t me!” The redhead yelled, shaking her head but it was useless, those people began to harass her and chase her like haunted souls.

All those murmurs drowned her in a deep misery.

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“Wanda.” A very distant voice interrupted that awful moment, as if it were a hand pulling her out of a stormy ocean. That voice called out to her again.

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“Wanda!” It was heard again. The redhead looked around her but those hideous versions of their loved ones didn't allow her to see, she was getting smaller and everything was darker.

She couldn't move, couldn't scream.

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“Wanda!” For the last time Y/N called her, and this time she managed to get her out of that nightmare.

The redhead woke up agitated, her heart beating so hard that she felt a sharp pang of pain.

Y/N tried to touch Wanda's shoulder but was surprised when Wanda moved a little scared, as if she was afraid she was going to hurt her.

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“Babe, are you okay? You were having a nightmare again and I couldn't wake you up.” Concerned, Y/N settled next to Wanda willing to help but not suffocate her. She wanted to give the Sokovian some space, this wasn't a normal nightmare. Not at all.

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Wanda nodded quickly again and sat on the bed. She covered her face trying to calm down, the tears that fell down her face were so real; the anguish she still felt in her chest.

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“Wanda…” Y/N turned on the bedside lamp.

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But Wanda just watched her hands, not even paying attention to what Y/N was saying. She just kept quiet, lost and scared.

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“Wanda, please...” The brunette tried once more. “You have to tell me what's going on.”

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The Sokovian only shook her head and dried her tears, those adorable green eyes showing the anguish she felt.

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“It's just... too painful.”

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“Is it about your variant?” Y/N dared to take her hand, this time Wanda didn't take it away. They entwined their fingers, joining once more. “The Scarlet Witch…”

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“I remember when she possessed my body, I felt as if… as if everything was taken from me, as if something… invaded my body. She took my life.” Wanda took the courage to speak, hoping that her voice wouldn't break. “Not being able to do anything, you just feel locked in my own body... and that's not the worst.”

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“All her memories come to me in dreams. I used to have dreams but now… every night is the same nightmare. And…” Wanda shook her head, trying to erase those painful images but it was impossible, she just ended up crying. “They’re so painful, Y/N.”

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Y/N looked into the green eyes of her beloved, terror and sorrow, Y/N could see how broken she was. “I can't believe that she went through all that, because… I don't know if I could do it. I-” Wanda’s voice and her lips trembled at the imminent crying. “Please don't let me go so far.”

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Feeling her heart was sinking into the depths of the ocean, that's how it felt to see Wanda so broken. The brunette ended up hugging her tightly.

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“Oh, my love…” Y/N cooed.

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Wanda allowed herself to hug Y/N and bury her face in her chest while Y/N caressed her hair slowly, leaving soft forehead kisses.

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“I saw them die, all of them, and I couldn't do anything. My parents, Pietro, Natasha, my children… they all left me. And you weren't there, Y/N…” Wanda whimpered, closing her eyes and hugging Y/N even closer. “I don’t want to be without you.”

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Wanda never walked away. Y/N spent the whole night comforting, listening and caressing her. Whispering the most loving words Wanda has ever heard. Giving her all the support she needed in that melancholic night. ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ This had to end at some point, right? That's what she thought, but it was the third week where Wanda couldn't sleep, where the nightmares wouldn't let her go on.

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But the days passed and the sokovian didn't seem to get better, it even seemed to get worse. Those adorable green eyes that showed her joy constantly now looked miserable, something had stolen that light. And Y/N was deeply afraid that she would begin to fall down that deep dark hole, and embrace the darkness.

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'Do you want to have dinner together today? I invite you wherever you want. If you don't want to go out, I can cook for you...' sent to Wanda.

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'I'm sorry, detka. I'm not feeling in the mood today, okay? Sorry. Maybe tomorrow. - Received from Wanda.

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'Of course, luv. Don't worry, if you need anything you know I'm here...' Sent to Wanda.

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Y/N sighed a bit sad, which her friend noticed quickly.

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“How's Wanda doing?” Jules's voice snapped Y/N out of her thoughts. They both entered the rest room for doctors, luckily there was no one but a doctor sleeping really deep.

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"Sad." Y/N sighed and sat down, opening some chips she'd bought from the vending machine. Jules handed her a bottle of fruit juice and kept one. “She's really down, Jules.”

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“Natasha told me that Wanda was avoiding her. Also, you haven't stopped eating junk food all week. That’s really serious.” Jules looked at her worried. For two weeks now, Wanda didn’t come to see her or bring some lunch as she used to do. That was beginning to worry the people who knew her at the hospital.

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“I never saw her like this, Wanda was always so… cheerful, even when she had the worst. This is different.”

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“And this is because…” Jules began trying to find the right words so she didn't end up screwing everything up. “A version of her called Crimson…”

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“Scarlet Witch!”

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“Scarlet Witch, yes, that one… That other ‘Wanda’ came and possessed her and…?” Jules tried to explain but it was even hard to understand what the heck happened.

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“Jules…”

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“Are you sure you weren't imagining it? It's okay, I haven't smoked a joint since I was in high school, but-”

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“JULES!” Y/N said again, turning so fast that some chips went flying. “If you say it one more time I SWEAR I WILL…”

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“Easy, bear. I was kidding! Of course I believe you.” Jules raised her hands, seeking peace. “There's a woman who's swinging through the city on cobwebs, a guy who's wearing a devil outfit. Of course I believe you about other universes!”

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“Thank you.” Y/N sighed and nodded, maybe she was too sensitive lately.

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“It's just… what you told me, she must have experienced stuff that no one else has. Thinking that everyone you love will die is not easy, but she saw it.” Her skin crawled just thinking about it. “She felt it all… if that happened to me I would either be shaking like a scared baby leaf or really pissed of. How would you feel?”

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After thinking about it again, Y/N nodded.

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“Yeah, you're right. It's like she can't move on, like she's frozen… Those memories are torturing her because she felt it.”

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“You have to do something.” Jules said worriedly, she cut her huge sandwich in two and gave half to Y/N. “We have to do something. She doesn't deserve this…”

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Y/N nodded and took a bite of that sandwich, sharing some fries with Jules as well.

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“And that sad-evil-Wanda told you something about her universe? Who are we in that universe? What if I'm a worm? Would you love me if I were a worm?”

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“She didn't tell me much, maybe that's why. We are worms.”

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Little by little, she opened her eyes trying to get used to the sunlight. A big weight on her chest; Wanda stayed in the bed for a while.

She didn't want to step foot out of that bed, she didn't even want to wake up that day but she had to. Sighing heavily, Wanda got up so she could go to the bathroom and find something to eat, walking like her feet weighed a ton.

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The good thing was that the twins were with Vision, he understood that she needed space for herself.

Scratching her head lazily, Wanda walked to the kitchen to get some cereal or a sandwich. The mirror reflection showing her messy hair, she hadn't taken off those pajamas for two days.

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“Who’s there? It’s you or it’s really me?” Wanda asked herself against her mirror, noticing dark circles under her eyes. “I don't know anymore.”

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She swallowed, what if that evil witch was hiding behind those green eyes? That woman who came to take away her safety and make her know what deep fear was. She didn't feel safe in her own body anymore.

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She sat on the couch to enjoy some cereal and an episode of 'The Office' when someone knocked on the door.

The sokovian gasped and got up from the couch to open the door. And seeing that woman on the other side didn't surprise Wanda at all, maybe just didn't think she'd see her right now.

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“What are you doing here?” Wanda rolled her eyes when that woman walked into her house without further ado. “I told you I didn't want to go out.”

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“Yeah, I read it.” Natasha took off her jacket. “But I didn't give a damn.”

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The redhead looked around, the house that Wanda used to have immaculate and perfect now was completely turned upside down. The mess, some bowls on the coffee table in front of the tv and some blankets and pillows on the couch.

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“Watching 'The Office' again?” Nat nodded at the Tv. “The wedding episode again, Wanda? Come on.”

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“Leave me alone.” Wanda grunted and stopped the episode, dropping the remote on the couch. “Nat, listen, you know I love you, you’re my sister and I don't want you to be mad at me but I want to be alone.”

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“Wanda, I love you very much, but fuck off.” Natasha dropped onto the couch and crossed her arms, she wasn’t going to move from that spot. “I'm not leaving until you tell me what's wrong with you and why.”

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“Nat, please…”

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“No, Wanda.” Natasha was final. “You completely changed out of nowhere. You don't talk to me anymore, you don't answer my calls, you don't want to tell me what's wrong. You don't want to leave your house, and you’re not telling me WHY.”

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“I can't tell you…” the Sokovian murmured, lowering her gaze, feeling a deep guilt cutting her heart.

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“Why not?” Natasha's eyes made Wanda hesitate. You could see the pain, her sister was avoiding her. “You don’t trust me?”

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How could she not tell everything to her best friend? To the person who was in her best and worst moments. Natasha was her sister, her best friend since High School, the one that supported Wanda when she decided to leave law school or the one who supported her when she made the decision to divorce Vision without criticizing her. The one who held her hand when the pregnancy contractions came. Natasha Romanoff.

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“It's complicated.”

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“I know complicated, because since we were girls you have never ignored me. It doesn't matter how bad it is.” Nat tried one more time, maybe, Wanda could finally open up. She was so close.

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“And not just me, I thought you wanted to even marry Y/N someday, you told me that a month ago.” Nat shook her head. “Now you’re avoiding her too. Are you playing with her again?”

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“NO! Of course not!”

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“Then tell me, Wanda. She loves you, but I bet she's losing her mind too. She’s afraid too.”

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“Okay…” Wanda swallowed. “I’ll talk… But to listen to this you need some coffee or lots of vodka and so do I.”

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Nodding quickly, Natasha watched as Wanda was going to the kitchen, dragging her pink slippers.

The russian took out her phone to send a message to Jules and tell her that Wanda finally seemed to open up, when someone knocked on the door.

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“Wanda, are you waiting for someone?” She yelled and Wanda answered quickly:

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“No, can you open it for me? I am a mess!”

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“Okay!” Natasha got up from the couch and went to the door to see who was the person she was constantly knocking.

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Opening the door a bit annoyed, Natasha found a found a teenager, with black hair and dark brown eyes. She was wearing a denim jacket with some pins on it, quite youthful and adorable.

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“Hi.” America greeted smiling, showing those big pearls. “Oh, my! You’re Natasha Romanoff!”

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“Yeah...” Nat frowned and smiled somewhat confused. Although nothing surprised her about America anymore, she was a pretty adorable but wild girl. “If you are looking for Wanda's kids, they’re with her dad this weekend…”

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“It's really nice to meet you.” America Chavez smiled widely and shook her hand quickly, so excited, not caring too much about the Russian's confused face.

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The girl came into the house and whispered a 'woooah' as she looked around, for the first time.

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“Wanda come here, I found a stoned child on your door!”

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Wanda went back downstairs quite confused.

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“America! How are you, honey?” The sokovian seemed worried. “Everything is okay?”

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“You... Do you know me?” America now was even more confused than Wanda, really surprised. How was it possible? She had never met a version of her in the vast multiverse. Was that possible? Was that real?

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“Yes...” Wanda looked at Natasha, now she understood very well what Natasha was saying.

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“Stoned as fuck?” Nat shrugged.

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“Clearly. America, sweetie, have you been smoking something with your friends, don't you?” Wanda narrowed her eyes and invited the kid to sit down, trying to look as calm and supportive as possible. “You know that Laufeyson kid isn't a good influence. He's wild but you have a whole future ahead of you, you can't throw away your life... you'll almost go to college! You can smoke something there... later. When you're older.”

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“What? No!” America exclaimed shaking her head. “You're not supposed to know me, well, not me. Do I have a version here? Where is she?” ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

Hearing that the girl called herself a 'version' made Wanda turn pale. A shiver ran down her spine, moving away from the girl a little.

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“Oh, no.”

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“Oh, please don't be afraid. That's not what I come here for…” The teenager tries to calm her down, panicking a bit. “I just came to give you this.”

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Wanda shook her head and got up from the couch, ready to walk away. “I don't want anything to do with her.”

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“Please.”

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“No.”

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“Wanda, what are you talking about?” Natasha frowned, so confused.

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“You must understand that I am not here to hurt you” America sighed deeply and searched for something in her jacket, taking an envelope out of it. “I just came to give you this. She's going to help you.”

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“Help me? She causes only chaos and pain.” Wanda said annoyed and scared.

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Silence reigned for a few moments until Natasha spoke again, breaking the moment.

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“Wanda... If any of this has to do with how you've been feeling lately, and even though I have no fucking idea what it is...” Nat widened her eyes, unable to believe what she was saying. “Don't you think it's better to face it?”

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She reached out to hug Wanda and cradle her face in her hands. “If whatever the girl brings is going to help you, just… try it.”

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Wanda hesitated for a moment, then nodded.

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“And after that, you're going to tell me what the hell is happening.” The Russian sighed and walked towards the kitchen, but not before pointing at the teenager. “You, stoned girl, come with me to the kitchen. I'll make you a sandwich, let her deal with this alone like she needs to.”

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America nodded and followed her, but not before giving the letter to the Sokovian.

Wanda took that paper in her hands and sat down on the couch to start whatever she would start now. What did that witch want now?

Wanda took a deep breath, took courage. Her hands trembled, tears welled in her eyes, but she stayed strong.

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‘Wanda. ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

I hope you’re reading this and give me a chance to explain, and also give yourself a chance to heal. I know that you will surely be upset, although to say 'upset’ or ‘annoyed' would be showing me too much mercy and I know that I don't deserve it.

I know myself and I dare to think that maybe we have more in common than we think. Tragedy does not unite us, but something more important does.

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I know that what I did to you is unforgivable and I'm not looking for that, because I know you won't. But I want you to know that I realized that what I did with you was not right, and that I will not forgive myself. I think I never will.

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You are everything I would have wanted to be, and it hurts me to have hurt you like others have hurt me. I should have… protected you.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

Someone very special told me that if it were the other way around, I would be suffering a lot right now and she was right, I think you know who I mean (finally found mine). I didn't think we'd meet, but everything was so…unexpected. As if it was destined. I think it's cruel to say that it was fate, it means that everyone had to leave for it to come true, is that selfish? Or mean?

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

That's when I knew that I had to get this off my chest and that I also had to give you the opportunity to heal. The reason for this letter is to ask you, please: let the fear go, with that terror that I experienced. That was my destiny, but it will never be yours.

My pain doesn't have to be yours, don't blind yourself to a completely different reality.

Being able to see your reality hurt me so much, knowing that you could have everything I ever wanted was a deep stab in my heart.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

I will never have that. I will never have my brother alive again, I will never see Vision again, I will never be able to visit my parents. And I must accept it, understand it and let it go. ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

But it also made me open my eyes. Open them to a completely new reality, to things that I didn't think I was looking for and that were waiting for me.

I decided to help this girl, América Chávez, you must be knowing her by now. She's… well, she's special. She’s a very good girl who has spent her life trying to find her moms.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

To be honest, I was planning to use her powers to steal your little ones and-'

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“What the hell? She was going to hurt the girl!” Wanda said annoyed, looking up to see the America, who from the kitchen just shrugged her shoulders.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“Yes, but she didn't. She’s helping me find my place in this new world, she takes care of me and in return she asked me to bring you this.” America grinned as she took a big bite of the sandwich.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

Wanda just sighed in exasperation and read that letter again, hoping that this crazy woman had something good to say.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

'To be honest, I was planning to use her powers to steal your little ones from you and bring them to a new realit,y one where we were a beautiful family.

I realized that I was being manipulated, yes, but a lot of it came from me, from my pain. From the loneliness in my heart.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

Thinking about the fear that the little ones would have, thinking that someone could do that to me again, that would hurt me immensely and its thanks to Y/N that I was able to understand it.

I don't know if I should tell you this but, I knew my Y/N here. And she is… amazing. She is very different but at the same time she’s not.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

Anyway, ever since I met her she hasn't stopped for a moment trying to make me feel good. To be there for me, even when we weren't even something.

The other day I saw her crying because she found a bee with a broken wing and it couldn't fly, and I really realized that (Besides thinking she’s an adorable crybaby) She's one of the best people I've ever met. She always seeks other people's happiness, even if it costs hers.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

I'm sorry I came into your life, but I'm glad I did because I would never have realized how much I love her.

Take good care of Y/N, she needs you and you need her. Don't push her out of your life, I know that's easy and she'll make you feel like you don't want to dim her light, but be honest with her and with yourself. You need each other.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

I don't need to read minds to know.

She loves you very much, I could see it, and I know that you love her. Don't ever let her go.

Take great care of the little ones, I know they will be loved.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

Once again, I'm sorry for all the damage I did to you. All the pain I caused you.

Thank you also for teaching me a new path to happiness.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

WM.-

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

Wanda never knew when the moment tears began to fall down her face. Sniffing, she reached for some kleenex to dry her tears. Natasha and America looked at each other.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“Everything's fine?” Natasha asked doubtfully.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“Everything's fine.” Wanda nodded.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“Was that what you needed?”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“It was what I needed.” Wanda moved closer to America, hugging her. Although for a moment the teenager remained still, slowly she hugged her back.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“I don't know you, but I know her… and I know you deserve to be okay.” The teen gently tightened the hug and then pulled away from her.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“Thank you, America.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“I’ve to go now, I shouldn't be here. I'm breaking endless rules just to bring this.” America's eyes widened and then she smiled widely. “Thanks for the sandwich, it was delicious. It was nice meeting you. Both.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“See you later!” Natasha said watching the girl leave and then she turned to see Wanda. “Was that America Chavez? The girl who babysit Billy and Tommy?”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

But the sokovian didn't receive any answer, Natasha frowned when she saw how Wanda was hugging that paper, crying and smiling, feeling a calm that she hadn't felt for a long time.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

Y/N took a deep breath and finally knocked on the door, thinking about everything she wanted to say. Every sentence written in her notes so she wouldn't forget it. She didn't want to make things worse, wanted to fix it. If there was something to solve, right? Yes, of course there was. They were happy.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

They are.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

Once the door opened, Y/N momentarily forgot how to breathe. Wanda looked as beautiful as ever, though she didn't seem surprised to see her.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“We need to talk.” Y/N swallowed, hoping the redhead wouldn't avoid her this time like so many times before.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

"Yes... Yes we should.” Wanda agreed and stepped aside. “Come in, please.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

Surprised to see that Wanda agreed to speak, the brunette went inside and looked around, noticing a great improvement. Things seemed to be in their place, the mess disappeared.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“Sit with me.” Both seemed very nervous, especially especially with the silence that lasted a few minutes.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“So…” Y/N cleared her throat before beginning. “I came because I think we should talk about what is happening lately. I'm sorry I came unannounced, but if I told you maybe...”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“I'd say I was busy or something.” Wanda finished the sentence somewhat embarrassed. “I was avoiding you.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“I know.” The brunette took Wanda’s hand. “And I get it. So please, let me start and then I'll listen to anything you have to say. I promise.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

Wanda just nodded.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“I love you.” Y/N stroked her hand gently, opening heart once more. “I love you, Wanda Maximoff. More than I ever thought I would, so listen carefully.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

Those two had been through a lot together, up and down. There was nothing they couldn't face, not even rejection or time apart, or a witch from another universe. Nothing could separate them but themselves.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“I know that what you have been through wasn’t easy. Damn, no one could understand how hard it must be for you to feel that. To have lived everything you lived, to see what could have happened in your life. All that loss, all that pain. Even I wouldn't have been that strong.” She sighed, noticing how Wanda's eyes filled with tears.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“And this time I know we've been a little apart, and I don't want you to feel bad about it.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

Wanda breathed heavily, feeling her heart sink. Maybe because she was expecting the worst, inside she was hoping that Y/N would come to leave her, say that she left her aside or claim what a bad girlfriend she had been.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

But the brunette always knew how to surprise her.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“I love you, Wands. And if you need space, I'm going to give it to you. If you need to be alone, I will allow you to be alone to heal, but listen to me: you will never be alone. I will always be by your side, whenever you need me.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

Wanda didn't seem to say anything. Although tears began to fall down her cheeks, she couldn't believe what an incredible woman she had next to her. How come after everything Y/N had been through she was still there for her? She was still willing to take her hand and face anything.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“I am willing to give you time, to listen to you, to do whatever it takes to see you better. To see you well, to see you happy... the way you need.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

Y/N was silent, waiting for an answer, but all Wanda did was swallow and then hug her lover so tightly, that she almost lost balance.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“All I need is you.” Wanda said snuggling against her, hugging Y/N so tight, afraid she would never see her again. “Just you. Nothing but you.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

Closing her eyes upon feeling the amazing relief that those words gave her, Y/N just kept hugging her for a long time, listening to everything Wanda had to say.

Wanda told her everything she saw in the Scarlet Witch's mind, but above all what she felt, and how it tormented her all that time.

Y/N perfectly understood the sokovian, it wasn't easy to be manipulated and have your body taken that way by someone else.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

But she also heard how that Wanda said that she should let it go, that wasn’t her burden. The owner of that load was trying to get over it and survive with it, so our Wanda couldn't help but understand. Wanda didn't know if she was forgiving the Scarlet Witch, but she was accepting that the witch could redeem herself and become a better person.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“I need to ask you something…” Y/N whispered as they lay on the bed, their legs intertwined just like their naked bodies under the covers. The warmth of Wanda's bare skin against hers was an exquisite and unique sensation.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

Leaving short kisses on the doctor's shoulder, Wanda looked up to see her. “About what, detka?”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

Y/N bit her lower lip, with a mischievous look. “I need you to be ready this Sat at 7 pm. I hope you’re not busy that day.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

Wanda raised an eyebrow. “Why? It's a date?”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“Maybe… Something like that.” Y/N narrowed her eyes.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“What are you up to?” Wanda wrinkled her nose and playfully poked the brunette's belly. “I love that face, I know you're up to something!”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“You won't know until you get to where I tell you to go.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“Oh, aren't you going to pick me up?” She looked at her surprised and amused. “That's new on you, Y/L/N.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

Y/N shook her head. “Can't say why. Just be there.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“Mmm... I wonder what it will be?” Wanda leaned in to face each other and kissed her. “But I'm all in.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤSATURDAY ㅤ

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

Taking a deep breath, Wanda looked at herself once more in front of the mirror. Her loose hair now looked brown, she thought that after all it would be good to make a change in her life. Starting with her hair color.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

“Do you like it?” Natasha asked as she finished arranging her hair, completely loose and two lovely classic braids joining behind her.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

“I love it.” Wanda smiled, feeling radiant. Her green eyes shone with a unique illusion this time. There wasn’t an ounce of sadness in them. She got up and looked at herself, and felt something she hadn't felt in a long time. In love, waiting to see his girl on a date.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

“I feel so good.” Wanda saw herself in the mirror, she was wearing a simple but pretty dress and quite soft makeup. “Do I look good?”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

Natasha took a moment to look at her and tried not to say anything, she couldn't expose everything she knew. “You look beautiful. Really gorgeous.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

“It's just a date, I shouldn't feel so tense.” The Sokovian bit her lower lip trying to hide that smile, applying some perfume.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

“It's normal, it's the love of your life.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

"She is." Wanda looked at her watch and sighed with great relief. “Okay, I'm on time.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

She was ready to go, the excitement in those green eyes was evident.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

“Okay, let's go.” Natasha took her car keys out of her purse, making keys jingle. “I'll take you where you need to go.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

“I don't want you to be late for what you had to do today with Jules. I can go alone, I just have to look up the address and I'll be there soon... or I can call a cab.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

“Oh, don’t worry. I have time.” Natasha smiled without giving up. “Come on, let’s keep talking about this on the road. I know you're anxious and want to talk.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

“So… How do you feel?”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

Her best friend's question brought Y/N out of her deepest thoughts. Yelena was next to her trying to help to adjust her blazer. The trio were in that room in the cabin that Y/N rented a week ago.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

“Excited but... a bit tense.” Y/N tried to fix her hair and see herself once more, going over everything she wanted to say and make no mistake. “A bit... Jeez. I’m scared as fuck.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

“She doesn't know yet? Wow, I thought Wanda would notice.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

“Of course not, this is a date... but not just any date.” Y/N turned around to help get some water, feeling her throat dry.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

“I told Natasha not to say anything to her.” Jules said as she arranged some daisies in cute bouquets, Wanda's favorite flowers.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

“And my sister listened to you?” Yelena raised an eyebrow. “Ha. That's new. She would have taken my head off.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

“Ha. You’re so funny.” Jules narrowed her eyes. It was something normal between them since Jules and Natasha started dating. Although Yelena and her seemed to get along like cat and dog, they also become very close friends.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

“Just kidding. I'm glad you're banging my sister, she’s in a good mood lately.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

“Oh my god!” Jules growled.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

"Yelena!" Y/N closed her quickly, shaking her head. “This is my moment, don't bring those images to my mind. Ugh!”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

“Not so ‘ugh’. Why the ‘ugh’? We’re two sexy women in love.” Jules raised an eyebrow but then decided to continue with what she was doing, carrying some flowers out of that room but not before saying: “You know what? I'm going to take this because you guys are making me nervous.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

“Are you the nervous one? I'm about to die here.” Y/N joked.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

“She's soooo baby, I can't joke with her. I like her, she’s such a good sister-in-law.” Yelena shook her head at the door and then turned to see Y/N. “Everything be okay, teddybear.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

Y/N just smiled and reached over to hug her. Yelena, her best friend. The one who had been with her for so many years, Yelena was with her in her craziest moments, in her saddest moments and now in her happiest moments.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

“I love you, Yelena.” Y/N whispered, tightening that hug. The five years without Wanda were horrible, but the five years without Yelena were terrifying. And although that was what made her friendship with Natasha stronger, she never stopped missing the blonde one. “Thanks for being in my life.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

“Thanks to you, teddybear. For letting me into your life and not kick me out of the room we shared.” Yelena confessed, closing her eyes and getting lost in that hug for a long time.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

Neither of them noticed that Kate Bishop come into the room, holding her camera until they heard the 'click'.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

“Oh, this is so cute. I hope you didn't mind that I took the pic. You can't do anything about it anyway.” Kate grinned, putting the camera back in her bag. “By the way, I came to tell you… Wanda is here.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

“What?”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

“Now?!” Y/N's eyes widened.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

“What are you waiting for?! GO!” Yelena snapped her out of the shock and kicked her out of the room.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ It was now or never. Y/N took a deep breath and started walking, ready to face it.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ The green of the trees in that forest never ceased to amaze her. Wanda and Y/N spent some weekends in some cabins a while ago, yes, but she didn't understand why they were near the Catskills now.

The Sokovian looked around a bit confused, she thought they were going on a date.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

“This is the place? Are you sure?” Wanda finally said, she didn't want to break the moment but she didn't understand what was happening. “Did you bring me all the way to the Catskills to kill me or something?”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

“Of course not, you dummy.” Natasha laughed and shook her head without taking her eyes off the road. “Y/N told me where I should drop you off and that's what I'll do.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

“Y/N told you to bring me here? Was everything planned?” Wanda asked surprised, her best friend hadn't told her anything about the plan and she pretended all day. “What do you know about all this?”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

“My mouth is closed.” Natasha drove for another two minutes and then . Around them there was only a road and a cabin in front. “This is as far as I get.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

“What?”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

The banging on the window made Wanda turn quickly, now looking how Y/N smiled and waved. She looked so beautiful that Wanda didn't even have time to say anything else to Nat, she just got out of the car when Y/N opened the door for her.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

“You look amazing.” Wanda muttered dumbfoundedly, looking at the love of her life.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

“Thank you, you look as beautiful as always. I love the hair, wow.” Y/N smiled charmingly, giving her a small bouquet of flowers that she chose for her. But the most beautiful detail was that it had been one of every flower she gave Wanda since the day they met. “This is for you.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

“Oh, Y/N… this is so…” Wanda's heart was about to burst when she leaned down to kiss her girlfriend's lips. “Thank you, detka.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

The brunette sighed deeply knowing what was coming so without further ado, she took out a black bandana from her jacket. “But that's not all... you need to take this.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

Frowning, Wanda smiled somewhat amused. “I don't think it's for what I imagine.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

“Mh, maybe later.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

“Ugh, I still hear you!” Natasha yelled from the car.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

They both laughed; Y/N settled behind her so she could cover her eyes.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

“Is it really necessary, detka? What are you up to?”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

“It’s a surprise.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

“What if I trip and hurt myself?” Wanda pouted.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

“I'll take you, you just trust me.” Y/N watched as Wanda wrinkled her nose. “Without this, there’s no surprise.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

Knowing that she couldn't do anything about it, Wanda accepted to cover her eyes. She hoped it was all worth it, because her heart beat harder with each step, not knowing what would happen at the end of the road.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

They walked together for perhaps two minutes, Wanda's senses sharpened and allowed her to hear some birds singing, and some murmurs she couldn't understand. The scent in the air seemed to be raspberry candles, her favorite ones which made her smile widely.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

Y/N led Wanda a few more feet until they stopped. Slowly and carefully, the brunette removed the blindfold so that she could finally look around her.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

A beautiful lakefront view and the trees behind them made a beautiful landscape, the sun hidding behind the mountains gave them a colorful sunset.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

The fresh breeze from the lake meant a new beginning. The place dimly lit by candles and warm lights.

But what surprised her the most was finding herself face to face with Y/N, who was watching her with incredible devotion.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

Around them were the people closest to her life. Those who really loved her were present.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

“What is this?” Wanda whispered astonished.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

“Well... I don't really know how to define it.” Y/N started looking around. “I think the best definition I can give you is a… this is a huge hug full of love.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

“Detka?” Wanda looked up, hoping it was what she thought.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

“I was thinking for a long time how to do it.” The brunette sighed deeply, taking Wanda’s hand. Hearts that intertwine, as their fingers once more. “When I was a kid I heard about this, many times. Not from my family because…it wasn't the best example, you know. Where my family comes from is…something special. It doesn't have just one meaning, I think it has many."

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

Y/N bit her bottom lip nervously, how many times she memorized what to say? And now she felt like a dumb shy little girl in front of her first love.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

“So, first I want to ask you something.” Y/N cleared her throat. “Do you love me?”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

Wanda let out a little tearful giggle due to emotion. “Of course I love you, you dummy.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

“You know that I love you with all my heart, and I know that you deserve all the best in this world.” Y/N sighed heavily and turned around, watching as Pietro walked towards them. He looked really handsome, in a gray suit and a white shirt. Those green eyes seemed to shine looking at the happiness on his sister's face. In his hands he held an orange ribbon.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

“Pietro? What is all this?”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

“You’ll see soon.” Pietro smiled.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

“This one, well… it's called handfasting. For those who don't know orange means kindness, encouragement, attraction. Umh, also means warmth, something that reminds me a lot of you…” Y/N said as Pietro tied the orange ribbon in their intertwined hands.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

“Which is something that will never be missing in your lives. This union between your hearts will always be always cheerful…” Pietro smiled looking into his sister's eyes. “I'm so proud of you, little sister.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

Feeling the tears want to escape, Wanda just smiled at him. “Don't be fooled, I’m the oldest.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

Giggling, Pietro finished tying the ribbon and walked away to make way for Kate, who was holding another ribbon in her hands but this time it was yellow.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

“Yellow means confidence, joy, harmony. What is necessary to maintain this beautiful relationship, all this time that we have been together, those things were never lacking.” Y/N smiled at her best friend, nodding for her to continue now.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

Feeling the tears want to escape, Wanda just smiled at him. “Don't be fooled, I’m the oldest.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

Giggling, Pietro finished tying the ribbon and walked away to make way for Kate, who was holding another ribbon in her hands but this time it was yellow.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ

“Yellow is also a symbol of light, like the sun, so warm, you know?” Kate babble in that adorable way as she tied the ribbons; she was wearing a beautiful black suit that looked too good on her. “Your love will always shine with a heavenly and unique light, like a… beacon of hope to those in sorrow.”

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Y/N noticed how Wanda tried not to cry but every second it became more difficult. Kate couldn't help herself and hugged them quickly before walking away as Natasha approached. That dress made her look like a goddess, but not too much to overshadow the night.

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“Red, your color... Red means passion, strength, lust and… fertility?” Y/N giggled, as did those around them. “Something that we will never lack is passion and I think that since we have known each other that has never been lacking. So I don't think that's a problem for the rest of our lives.”

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“And what would we be without passion, right? ” Natasha raised an eyebrow and went over to tie that red ribbon. “Wanda… You've been my best friend for so long, I can't remember my life without you. When we were two girls at school, you were the first girl I'd ever met who came from another place. Like me.”

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Natasha sighed deeply to be able to say those words without getting all emotional. “And even though we've been through a lot together, this is the first time where I've really seen you happy. I see you safe, because I know that you have someone who will fight for you forever and who will never leave you alone. Besides, I'm going to break her face if she hurts you.”

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“Hey.” Y/N complained and everyone laughed. But Wanda couldn't take it anymore, tears began to fall.

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“I love you, Wands. I love seeing you so happy.” Natasha smiled happily and hugged her for a moment before walking away, giving way to her girlfriend. Jules was wearing a gorgeous wine-colored suit.

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“Blue means fidelity, tranquility, patience, devotion, sincerity.” Y/N started again. Jules came closer showing that blue ribbon, intertwining it carefully. “Something that identifies us too much. The devotion I feel for you is something I have never felt, and will never feel again. The peace you give me, every day. The patience with which we decide to solve our daily stuff, trying to calm down and be patient.”

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“Devotion, love and peace is what I’ve seen in my friend since she saw you again.” Jules sighed deeply, nervous but happy. “Fidelity is something that I know will always be between you, not only as a couple but as partners, as friends. Because from the time I've known Y/N, I've never seen her so in love and whipped since she's with you. Thank you for that, thank you for giving her back that cute heart when you came back. Because you are her heart, and It wasn't easy for Y/N to be without you. I wish you to be strong, because your love will never break. That you may be at peace and believe in each other. My wish today is you both may be steadfast and your union unbroken.”

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Y/N and Wanda nodded. The dark haired woman couldn't help but shed a small tear when listening to her friend.

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“Thank you, Jules.” Wanda whispered, sniffing trying to calm herself but her crying came back as soon the twins approached them. They both wore two adorable suits, although Billy was more elegant and Tommy was wilder.

Definitely Pietro and Monica helped.

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“Purple means healing, health, strength, power, piety, sentimentality.” Y/N winked at the twins who were tying the ribbon between their hands.

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“Hi, mom.” They both greeted at the same time. “You look beautiful.”

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“Hi, babies.” Wanda sobbed. “You look so elegant. I feel so lucky to be your mom.”

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“You look amazing.” Billy smiled widely. “We really like to see you happy and we know that Y/N makes you feel that way. She loves us, takes care of us and makes us laugh. We also love her very much.”

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“We love you too, mom.” Tommy nodded. “We will always support you and wish you to be happy. Also, Y/N is the coolestl! Always agree to play video games with us! And when we feel sick, she takes care of us. Telling us stories before we sleep, and makes us feel better.”

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They laughed and watched as the kids walked together and settled next to Pietro and Monica, now the one who cried was the brunette.

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“Okay, it's hard not to cry like a baby right now.” Y/N giggled and wiped away a tear. “Green means fertility, again. What the hell did they have with all the colors meaning fertility?”

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With a green ribbon in her hands, Monica came to them with a kind smile as always.

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“Also means charity and generosity, that you may share of yourselves freely. Green is symbolic of new beginnings, that your union may be nourishing and healing, and your happiness abundant. Green will always be the color of hope.”

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The one who came to them now was Yelena, who seemed somewhat nervous but undoubtedly very sure of what she would say. She was wearing a black dress to match her beloved Kate Bishop.

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“Hello, Wanda Maximoff. Y/N Y/L/N.” The russian blonde said with that thick accent, looking for the best way to express her feelings. Something in which she always been a bit clumsy.

Yelena cleared her throat.

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“The black one means strength, empowerment, wisdom, vision, success. That your union may flow and fill you to your depths.” Yelena took the black ribbonand tied it carefully. “I have known you both for a long time. Wanda, you’re like a sister to me, you’ve always been by my side and Natasha's all our lives.”

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She swallowed and tried to keep from tearing up. Especially when Wanda and Y/N kept crying very moved.

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“I've seen your best and worst times…even the worst changing diapers for those little brats over there.” Yelena teased making them laugh. “And I've met Y/N in college, when we were two crazy people who could barely make it to class, filled with so much coffee. But I … I remember Y/N always had two things on her mind: to be a good doctor and help people... and someone to share madness and love with.”

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The blonde smirked slightly. “I’m so happy to be here… see you fulfill your dream. I love you both. So, please Wanda, say yes, I don't want to kick your as again.”

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Yelena walked away and this time Darcy approached, one of Wanda's close friends and partner. A gorgeous, impulsive but very smart woman.

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“Well, the truth is that I don't really like being the center of attention but… Y/N insisted a lot.” She rolled her eyes clearly teasing.

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Wanda gave a tearful giggle.

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“The pink ribbon means unity, honor, truth, romance, happiness.” The blue-eyed girl took the pink ribbon and entwined it in the girls' hands, making a pretty bow. “I have always seen you that way, completely united by such a sincere and beautiful love. Which I must admit gives me a nice healthy envy.” She laughed. “Like pink blossoms, means soothing and healing hearts. Symbolic of love, this love may be filled with eternal love. The truth is that I never believed in love, much less for myself, but you both… you showed me that it can beautiful and true. I've been watching you both for the last year, and the love you two have is real.”

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She smiled at them once more before three very handsome men came to them. They each wore a different suit, but they definitely had a unique style.

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“Hello, ladies. You look wonderful… I'm glad to be with you today.” With a charming smile, Sam approached with a white ribbon. “White, is symbolic of clean beginnings. A new one between you both, you have overcome great obstacles and we should all learn from it. Also means purity, concentration, meditation, peace. May your love be filled with peace and reconciliation.”

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Bucky moved forward so he could tie the silver colored ribbon, his eyes showed so many emotions but as always, he tried to hide them with a smile for his friends.

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“After five years of being by your side, Y/N, I know that you have waited for this woman every day and knowing that she will be with you the rest of your days makes me feel so happy for you, my friend. Wanda, I know you're going to love her with all your heart because I can see it in your eyes. You complement each other, I’m glad to have witnessed your union one more time.” Bucky tied that ribbon carefully. “The silver means treasure, values, creativity, inspiration. Silver, means wisdom, this love may be filled with wise choices. May your love weather every storm in this life.”

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Bucky moved away from them not without giving both a short hug. Steve nodded, being the last one as he approached with a ribbon as golden as his hair.

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“And finally, the last but not the least…” Steve grinned and hugged them both before continuing. “The Golden one means energy, wealth, intelligence, longevity. Also means wisdom, that as you grow in age you may grow in insight. I wish, with all my heart, this love be a treasure of happiness and a joy to you… Always and forever.”

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When Steve finished and walked away, Wanda was unable to speak. She turned to see Y/N who was watching her with unique love and devotion, although Y/N also tried to remain calm and not burst into tears.

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“Wanda Maximoff…” Y/N began, caressing her hand. Now they were tied together by many ribbons of different colors. “Since I met you my life changed completely. I was… completely fascinated with the woman you are, gawking.”

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Wanda was lost in her eyes, so in love. A look full of emotion, curiosity and a lot of sincere love.

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“I felt for a long time that I was never going to be enough for you because, look at you, you are incredible.” Y/N sighed deeply, trying not to let her voice tremble when she saw those big green eyes and not succumb to them.

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“But then I spent five years without you, five years where I grew up to see a world without you. Many here have lived it, a world much grayer, darker and sadder.”

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Wanda didn't say anything, just tried to listen to Y/N, fighting against the urge to go and kiss her a lot.

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“You’re my whole world, you’re my life and you’re my love. I am completely proud of the person you are, how kind you are when you talk to anyone, even if you don't even know them. You always treat everyone with respect and equally.”

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Y/N smiled widely. She didn't need to remember a big ass speech, just say what was on her heart. What she thought every day when she woke up next to Wanda or watched her make breakfast.

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“I love your accent, that Sokovian accent that sometimes fades into an American one, but always comes back. Oh, how much I love when you call me detka.” Y/N smiled seeing Wanda Maximoff’s happy smile in front of her. She was about to take her breath away once more.

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“That is why, after all this, I want to ask you if you want to strengthen this love. I know you've been married before, old-fashioned white dress, church and all… And I know you have a past, and I don't mean to take that away from you. What I want is to take your hand and give us an opportunity to show you all my love. It doesn't have to be soon, it can be in months, in a year, or ten. I just want to ask…” Y/N took a deep breath and smiled: “Wanda Maximoff, do you want to be my forever? Will you marry me?”

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Y/N waited almost a second until Wanda just said:

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“YES.” Wanda screamed excited. “Yes, yes, I want to marry you. Today, tomorrow, thousands of times if necessary.”

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“Oh, thank all the gods.”

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The sokovian nodded quickly and ended the distance to kiss her lover's lips, they couldn't hug each other but both joined their bodies to be as close as possible.

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“We’re getting married!” Wanda exclaimed excitedly once they pulled away from the kiss.

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“Yes, we are!” Y/N said in the same way, laughing loudly. Everyone was clapping happily and cheering for the engagement of those two, two souls that met again, always fighting against whatever was put in front of them.

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Wanda finally allowed herself to cry with joy. “Oh my God! I don't know how we'll top this! This is so amazing... I love you so much, Y/N. So much.”

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“I love you, Wands.” Y/N tucked a brown lock behind her love's ear and gazed at her lovingly. “We will find out together. Like everything… always together.”

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What do you think? did i disappoint you? Be honest. 🌼

This is the end of the road, my friends. 😭 I hope you liked this crazy cute angsty trip.

Thank you so much for reading me, it means a lot to me. That you comment, that you give repost or a like. Means a lot. I will continue writing more to make you feel good. I'm opening the requests for a bit.🐻

the cutest and lovely people tags ✨ @blckrwidow @imnotasuperhero @wandsmxmff @dudaaaluthor @marvell-love - @ etheriaaly - @idcplss - @how-to-disappearrr - @simp4nat - @cristin-rjd - @etheriaaly @idcplss @lonewalker17 @zairaaaa @mrscromanoff @kacka84 @helladumbsstuff @dandelions4us @karsonromanoff @trikruismybitch @danicarpediem @sunsol-22 @cristin-rjd @wndaswife @tita001 @justgotlizzied @katiemay-025 @dangladam Thank you so much to you all, lovely bees🐻.

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#wanda maximoff x reader #wanda maximoff x f!reader #wanda maximoff imagine

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kakashiislut · 1 year

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Actually kinda curious how magni would react if his s/o was pregnant, and how he would be during the the whole process.

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Don’t worry! I got them both, and like low-key same 💀 my phone and WiFi have been so bad it’s killing me. My phone is 4 years old, (an iPhone 11) and it’s dying on me. But I love her 🥹 I named her Maxwell. (There is two parts to this ask btw)

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Warnings: Just some mean talk, gets better eventually. Fem!reader, GN baby!

Authors Note: Just a random Drabble, nothing much.

Magni Thorson & Pregnant!Reader

At first he would get angry. Super mad, what the hel, he doesn’t want a kid. Why would a god like him want a kid with you?

But then it hits him….you’re pregnant, because of him. It’s not your fault, he’s the one that came into YOU.

He’s a big douche, so at first you probably won’t see him around, but Sif goes crazy on him when she finds out and forces him to take care of you more.

The forcing soon turns into his own decision, he starts to fall in love with you and the thought of a child. The way you become so chubby, the waddling around the house, its so...domestic.

You can’t even fucking bend down to grab a sock, he has to do it for you, you NEED him. Of course that’s what he thinks. You don’t need him, but of course he helps.

He would eventually start leaving the house after giving you a kiss.

The sweetest kisses low-key. On the face, nose, forehead, lips. He kisses everywhere.

He would start rebelling more. He doesn’t wanna go out on dangerous missions and wonder if he’ll come home to see you running at him like a penguin.

When your child is born, he’s so nervous and anxious they don’t let him hold your baby until he’s calm and sitting down. They don’t want him dropping the babe :(

When he holds them, he’s so mesmerized with how small they are. How could this be possible.

He’s especially heart broken when his own mom tells him that he was once that small.

How can a huge man like him…be so small and defenseless like his child. Oh god he’s gonna protect them with his ENTIRE life.

Will watch you Breast feed, ‘cause he doesn’t trust your boob. You have to yell at him for some privacy, ‘cause he’ll just believe everything wants to harm this baby.

This man will NOT get up at night to calm the baby. He’s so tired and selfish.

To make up for that, he does often calm the baby during the day and change their diaper.

He does gag WILDLY. Like you can hear him from outside.

Baby onetime pissed all over him, so you taught him to gentle rub the babies lower belly to release the rest of the pee. Makes sure to do it for like five minutes.

He’s afraid.

Someone disrespected his family once and the man was never found again. Like ever. Not even blood. No one knows what happened.

Gets jealous when he sees the baby laughing widely while you’re making funny faces at it.

He’s not jealous of the attention the baby’s getting. He’s jealous, ‘cause he wants to make the baby laugh…not you :(

If the babe won’t stop crying? Easy. Let magni hold them. They calm down right away…Magni is just so soft and bear like. His boobies are squishy.

If your baby starts speaking? He often calls him “bear”, instead of “papa”

Magni is one fluffy bear.

#send me asks #yes yes yes #god of war #god of war smut #god of war x reader #gow #kratos #kratos smut #gow magni #magni #magni x reader #magni thorson smut #magni thorson Drabble #fan fic stuff #fan fic writing #fan fic requests #magni and modi #magni fluff

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hater-reads · 9 days

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Haunting Echoes of the Past - CHAPTER 4. The Calm Before the Storm

Gojo let him go. After all, Geto was already moving on, or so he thought.

Gojo started to put his life together, he found out that what he really wanted was to be a teacher, so he could protect kids like Geto; so, he could teach stupid kids -like he once was- to really be able to talk about their feelings and be strong enough to not fall into their families' expectations. Because he realized, his life had broken down in pieces because of him, his stupid choices, his family, and the cowardice that took over him back then.

Now, he would have to work his ass off, like he never did. Surprisingly, life gave Gojo a chance. That university degree that he thought would be of no use, was a useful tool for his new life as a teacher. It took him a while to find a place, but thanks to old contacts he had met while studying, he was given a place at a high school a bit far from the city.

Despite the unseriousness with which he spoke, Gojo was good at his job. He respected the rules, and the students trusted him, they almost saw him as a friend. Thanks to that, he was beginning to feel a little less lonely.

Yuta Okkotsu, one of his top students, said in his graduation speech that if he had been able to get this far, it was thanks to his teacher Gojo Satoru. Gojo was moved and he became fond of the boy. Even after graduating, the boy would email him to see how he was doing and ask if he wanted to go out for coffee sometime. Gojo accepted and discovered that Okkotsu was a more mature person than he thought he was, life had not been easy for him, and after a round of meetings, Gojo saw him as a friend.

Life was flowing calmly for the first time in years. A calm and quiet life, yes, he was lonely, but he felt peace. Every so often, he dreamed of Geto and the memories of his youth. When this happened, he would drink some water and avoid sleeping, then spent hours looking at the sky. He felt that the moon and the starry night were as close as he could ever get to Geto again. It was okay for him.

The years went smoothly, nothing big happened. A few more years working and then he could retire as a teacher, he thought.

It was a day like any other, when a woman arrived at his office. He was sitting in his desk looking through papers when the woman walked in without asking. He knew who this was, almost like if he had already met her before, except he didn't. He could feel his essence coming from her. A slim woman with blonde hair, he would never have guessed that this was Geto's type.

"Satoru Gojo." the thin woman said.

"Who are you?" he said, not caring.

"I think you know very well who I am."

"I don't know why you came here, but I don't have anything do to with him anymore. I haven't seen him for ages."

"He's dying." said the woman with a serious tone, there was not a bit of humor in her voice.

Gojo felt his world stop. He stood abruptly and slammed his hands on the desk at the same time.

"I'm not in the mood for jokes. Tell me why you are really here!"

He looked at the woman who had teary eyes, she wasn't joking, not in the slightest.

This was not possible, Geto was a healthy person, he took care of his diet, and exercised, he was a little thin but nothing to worry about. How could he be sick?

"What happened?"

"He has a heart condition that the professionals barely noticed. He had a heart attack a few weeks ago. We thought he was getting better, but his heart became less and less responsive. I'm afraid there's not much they can do."

Things were serious. Gojo's body felt heavier and heavier, and his whole body ached with pain too hard to bear. He sat back in his chair, trying to process the sad news, he didn't speak for a while, it was hard to breathe. On another occasion, he would have asked her to leave, but this woman didn't even have his number. Talking about Geto now was the only thing they could do.

"Where were you, huh? He spends years of his life with you, and you are not even able to take care of him and realize that he is getting sick." Gojo said with a tone of both disdain and disgust.

"And what about you? That you let him go just like that. Think I don't know about you and him? The pain you put him through?"

"His illness has nothing to do with me!" Gojo screamed.

"It does, you scumbag!" The woman lost her sanity. "I heard him mourn at night for years, during our marriage I had to hear him say your name in his sleep countless times, even if he cried or laughed, he always said your name!"

Gojo was speechless, how could Geto still think of him when he had a wife who loved him?

The woman kept touching her eyes, trying to stop the tears.

"You know...we even have two daughters, two adorable girls who love him. And he loves them more than anything in the world. I thought that by giving him children he would be able to move on, but even now, I know he's looking for you in the crowd."

Gojo could imagine him, Geto was probably a loving and responsible father, he imagined him playing with his daughters, taking them to stores, his daughters probably playing with his hair. He imagined Geto playing with dolls, and he couldn't help but smile.

The woman continued, "I am married to him legally, but I suspect he was always married to you in soul. He has a void that I will never be able to fill."

Gojo didn't speak.

"I don't know how much longer he has left, if you want to do something good for once and say goodbye, this is the hospital where he is. The girls and I are with him every hour." The woman took a deep breath. "I hate you more than anyone, I hope you realize that. But I know that seeing you one last time will give him the peace to leave without regrets." said the woman as she left Gojo's office, without even looking him in the eye.

What was Gojo going to do now? His life was finally going as it should, but now that he was calm, that woman came with news that made him lose his mind. He was going to lose him, not for the first or second time, he was going to lose him forever. Only at that moment did Gojo realize how insignificant all those years of pretending to leave everything behind had been. Nothing made sense, there was no point in pretending that he lived well and that he had made peace with his past. He had not.

He always thought that he would leave this world before Geto, because seeing himself alone in a world where his Suguru did not exist was too painful to bear. So, he always thought that he would die and Geto would live a long and happy life, even if it was without him.

It was as if the world was coming to an end.

#gojo satoru #geto suguru #jjk art #jujutsu geto #jjk fanart #fanfic #gojo #jjk geto #satosugu #ao3 #ao3 fanfic #fanart #jjk angst #angst #jujutsu sorcerer #yuta okkotsu #geto x reader #gojo x geto

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inconmess · 29 days

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I really want to write a character study of the people in the Crimson Mirror but I am more fixed on Oscar and Cosmo at the moment cuz it has revived my interest on immortal figures and how they cope. SO back to the Grimm boys. (gonna tag all these speculations under Grimm theories if you want to look up) Also, a continuation of this post is right up here

Again, warning, long rant post.

You know… With the way it is revealed that over 87 years, Oscar has died 7 times prior to Tide and Bone, I wonder how many times he died and came back to life before Candela caught onto him cuz let's face it, no way is anyone going to know immediately after the ship incident about the side effects of the ritual. Maybe Candela does approach Cosmo and Oscar as the survivors of the ritual to know the deets but that should be about it. Even if Oscar died in the shipwreck, only Cosmo would know and the first death can be brushed off as a hallucination or close call because they are at sea.

It is during the second death that either of them knows that something is fishy but let's say due to some convenient shit it is not as easy to suspect it. Another death brushed off. But now it's a little obvious that Oscar does not come out unaffected as he starts forgetting things.

The third time is the charm and this time, his death and coming back from it was totally unexplainable because it should not be possible for him to survive the thing because let's say he was crushed to death or something more severe, but he did. That is when they actually look into what the fuck is going on more in detail because now it is obvious that something is going on in the background and that Oscar is coming back from the dead and missing memories as a consequence every single time.

It is this that sends Cosmo on full gear to research more about why this is happening and what actually happened in the ritual and how to stop this from happening because by this point, everyone has started to notice that Oscar is not aging also since the accident. (I'm placing the third death to be roundabout 10-15 years after the ship incident) I would say Candela catches onto this in his 3rd or 4th death because he comes back to life after a really impossible death situation and also isn't aging a day older from the incident, and Candela have been keeping tabs on them since the moment they mentioned a ritual, so even if Cosmo and Oscar don't tell them their discovery of Oscar and his revivification, they knock on their doors about it.

Dying 4 times over 2-3 decades have notified people that something is wrong but the 5-6 decades after with no answers kinda increases Oscar's recklessness and makes him less hopeful that he's actually going to die, that he'll live on forever without peace, Cosmo, while he's happy to have his father around him also is tired of all the lies and stories he has to spin to keep Oscar close and keeping Candela away from experimenting on the man and trying to figure out answers he can't get...

And Candela's increasing scrutiny at the fact that Oscar can't die and them using it to their advantage cuz a man who can't die sent into a undercover mission to collect information with the guarantee that he won't die? Who wouldn't want that? Or who wouldn't want to keep a close eye on an immortal man who has the secrets to unlocking how not to die?

Cosmo also essentially becomes his own inside man in Candela, making connections to keep an eye on what the higher-ups think about Oscar and what they plan to do with him in order to shield Oscar from whatever experiment they might plan to do with him.

The difficulties of having an immortal parent as you yourself grow old, afraid of leaving the parent under the shitty hands of an organization which doesn't really have a moral code when it comes to figuring out stuff and doing what they want to do and just feeling so tired and done of all the secrets you can't tell people...

And the parent in turn feeling shitty as they need to be taken care of by the child as they aren't aging and have to blend in, and even if they are tired oflife, they can't feel their age and time and again and again you hope you will die and stop being a burden, but it never happens. I wouldn't be surprised if Oscar had tried to take his own life in all this mess and it was one of his 7 deaths. I feel for both of them

#messy thots #Grimm Theories #cosmo grimm #oscar grimm #candela speculation #candela obscura #I can't stop thinking about them

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2a8n · 9 months

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Shirogane's dream

I wanted to speculate a bit about Shirogane's dream shown to us in the Ice Scream Original (Round 2), since some of the moments shown will either be redone in the Ice Scream Remake or confirmed in it. And according to the old tradition, I write in advance: "Sorry for the quality", because some screenshots might not turn out in the best quality, but I tried to make them at least better than my previous such screenshots. Well, let's get started!

It all starts with showing the ceiling in one of the rooms of the Ice Cavern and our depressive wolf lying on the bench there. Personally, I would be very scared to be there simply because I would be constantly afraid of one of the icicles falling from the ceiling on me. At the same time, Shirogane can easily be in this pleace, and even more so lie and sleep on the bench there. The other one who was there was a bunny, and that's to arrange a GAME OVER player on the screen.

Next, we are shown the dream itself. It starts all this confusion Suno-san jumping into the middle of the white space like a bunny. At the same time, in Round 3 we will be shown that he can teleport, and also when showing his moving game sprite, we can see a movement that looks more like crawling, but not like a jump. I don't know if this snowman is really capable of moving in as many as 3 distinct ways, or if Suno-san's jumping in this dream is just Shiro's own fantasy.

Note that in Shirogane's dream, squid tentacles appear, a flower dancing at night in the Peraco house, bunnies, and Nekoyama. This tells us that Shiro saw/met all of these things/characters, which is confirmed by the following: 1) In the Remake, Shirogane lies on the snow and sees a Squid, whose tentacles stick out of the water surface; 2) A similar flower stands next to the television in Peraco's house, but it differs from the flower shown in the dream in the absence of a leaf and a thinner stem; 3) There is no need to talk much about bunnies - they can often be seen on Iceberg Isle (as well as Rock running from anger, probably…); 4) And finally, Nekoyama - our cameo from Wadanohara and the Great Blue Sea. He can be found in Round 2 delivering cigarettes to Orca. As a result, it can be assumed that the rest of what is shown is also familiar to Shirogane. And this makes me wary:

if our wolf could see a simple fish in the same fishing buckets of Rock, then to consider the moon-fish or those white squids, he would have to dive straight into the water, most likely;

Tori-san can be either a simple easter egg (remember Tori-san's toy in Rocma's house), or a frozen Tori-san that Shirogane once saw;

has Shiro met the Mogekoels? I hope they didn't try to hit him with their arrows while doing so…

the head of a huge white "something" with an outstretched tongue raises many questions in me. Is there a possibility that this is the head of a huge turtle, on which a huge glacier has frozen and, thus, having formed Iceberg Isle, it swims in the northern latitudes, preventing the isle from melting and the inhabitants on its back from dying?

It doesn't surprise me that the phrase "Bad doggy" and Suno-san appear here. I'm more surprise why he uses the parachute of Mogekov Hashasky and… bees on a background.

If there are good Japanese translators with good eyesight, please translate the symbols on the background. I will be very grateful for this. ( v _ v )

Here you can see Peraco's name-calling towards Shiro. I don't know what else to add here.

What did I ever even do? It is this question that our wolf asks when once again the hot-tempered penguin, familiar to all of us, takes out his frustration or anger on him.

Fall - it is unclear only, emotional and/or physical.

Shirogane managed to be a wolf, and a dog, and a bunny, and even a caterpillar in his and others' fantasies. It remains only him managed to be happy in real and then his life was a success! =D

It is noteworthy that the snowman appears here only on the red background. Neither he nor Shiro can be seen on the black background. Because of this, I get the impression (or maybe it's an attempt to convey the impression of the wolf himself) that the talking pissed snow is stalking him and/or watching him quite often…

youtube

That's it for now. Yeah, there are some monologues to Shirogane that were later moved to Watch 1 of the Remake, but I want to give them time in a separate post. I will also pin here a video with this very dream from the official DSP channel and a walkthrough of one of the youtubers with this very fragment of the dream game (9:36 - 10:33) in case you yourself want to disassemble it. Until then, see you soon! ;)

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saints-who-never-existed · 1 year

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Episode Ten: Random Rewatch Observations

Here we go. I’ve honestly held back so long from doing this one, in part because I never want to series to end, but also I had to gear myself up emotionally for the trauma...

1. God is it any wonder Little looks so miserable when you see the vast expanse of grey nothing he’s staring out at? There’s no real hope left but no real choice but to keep going.

2. Also strikes me that wee George Chambers is the last Boy standing, isn’t he? Young and Evans are dead, Golding’s gone to the dark side.

3. It’s so cruel of them, Le Vesconte especially, to let Little go on his inspirational rant before they drop the truth bomb about the vote but it’s also clear to see why it’s done that way. If they’d discussed it privately beforehand then each could’ve argued their case, and Little might more easily have been able to refuse (for all the difference it would make in the end). But telling him about it right out in public, in amongst all the men, is very deliberate and completely forces his hand. Just godawful!

I also have to wonder if it’s that old problem of them sticking so rigidly to rules and procedure again, even unconsciously. He’s the highest-ranking officer now, perhaps it’s protocol to wait until he speaks first?

4. Note that he says “two able-bodied lieutenants” here. Like, it would be one heart-breaking thing if deep down they resented Jopson his new position, didn’t see him as equal, but they do! They clearly see him as one of them and that’s worse because they leave him behind anyway!

5. God they’re all so deliberate in the way they talk about things as well, like they’ve been rehearsing it and justifying it to themselves over and over again. The ill won’t be ‘left behind’, they’ll just ‘stay’.

6. Might just be me but I believe the pitch of the title theme has been lowered significantly in this episode – a sign of their sharp, terrible descent? I’ll need to go back through the other episodes at some point and note if it’s altered at any other point, but I don’t think it is.

7. Oh Goodsir, baby girl! He’s so shaky and sore and unsteady on his feet and clouded in his mind already here, it’s gut-wrenching.

8. Also interesting to note what he remembers about David Young, even if he can’t remember his name – “he was afraid, he wanted us to run”. Young’s death was awful and memorable enough on its own, but it’s got to be extra-traumatic as a doctor, I think – to see someone so afraid and know that even with all your knowledge and skill, you can’t do anything about it.

9. The piles of cans left outside the tent are just a complete slap in the face, they really are - serving only to comfort those leaving, not those ‘staying’ behind who, with the exception of Jopson, are completely unable to leave the tents to get to them anyway.

10. Something about Goodsir dying with no shoes and just his little woolly socks on is so personal and horrendous to me.

11. I’m sure I’ve read somewhere that they had a better on-screen death for Tozer but ran out of time/money to film it and that’s a tragedy to me. Like, even if it was just him going down swinging and getting a good shot in as he goes (as the off-screen sound-effects imply here) then I’d love to have seen it. Tozer and Hodgson in particular are both worthy of redemption in my book.

Does anyone know more specifically what they’d planned for Tozer’s death?

12. I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again – “Close…” takes EFFORT. I have to imagine that a person literally seconds from death would be hard pushed to speak at all or make any sound beyond vague groans of pain, but he doesn’t just do that. He puts physical and mental effort into croaking that one last and very specific word and the fact is that we’ll never truly know why!

13. Another thing we’ll never know is why he’s separate from the others too. It echoes Hodgson’s isolation actually, now that I think about it – just as with the chains, we don’t know if it’s something he did to himself or something that was done to him by the others, and we’ll never know.

14. Also! Crozier would it kill you to touch the man! That hand holding back by mere millimetres from brushing through his hair will haunt me the rest of my days. Here’s a man who throughout the entire story has been well-established as showing comfort, affection, and solidarity through physical touch and he doesn’t truly get it in return even in his final moments! (I know Crozier touches his shoulder etc. but it’s just not the same to me and I’m still distraught!).

#The Terror #The Terror AMC #S01E10 #We Are Gone #Observations #Edward Little #George Chambers #Henry Le Vesconte #Thomas Jopson #Harry Goodsir #David Young #Solomon Tozer #Francis Crozier #Sorry I'm literally tagging everyone again

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farfromstrange · 11 months

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💌 A letter to you lovely people 💌

I wanted to come on here to thank you once again for over 500 followers! I think we’re at 518 now and it feels like such a fever dream.

I started writing on here in July 2022, so it’s almost been a year, and the love you all have shown me since then is blowing my mind every day! We’ve grown so much as a community and for the first time, I feel less alone with the things I like. I get to do what I love and share it with people who find enjoyment in what I write and it’s just… wow. I’ve never thought I would come so far, and I am so fucking grateful to every single one of you because you have saved my creativity and kind of my life because I’ve felt so alone before I came on here, and ever since then I’ve felt like I’ve had a purpose, even when things got rough.

So thank you again, and I consider all of you my friends. I’m so glad you could find pieces of yourself in my work and that it helps you as much as it helps me. I’m so happy that I get to make you laugh, cry and sweat every day with my work, and I don’t think I could ever grow tired of you all or this.

I owe it to Tumblr and the Daredevil fandom that I’ve met who I consider my best friend and platonic soulmate @blackshadowswriter and I don’t think that would have happened if I’d listened to it anxiety and never posted anything on here. I love you with all of my heart 🤍 you are so talented and you deserve the world. Without you, I think my life would only be half as great as it is now.

And to the rest of you, and those who I have just recently started bonding with over Matt and Mikey, also, I can’t even describe how lucky I am to get to know such talented people.

You all have a very special place in my heart, and I want all of you to know that you are perfect just the way you are. You deserve good things and you are loved. Don’t be afraid to speak your mind, you all have a voice and I encourage you to use it. Do what you love and don’t let anyone tell you that you can’t do something. Live for yourself. Fight for what you want. And just be yourself, always because that’s the best version of you 🤍

Thank you, and I can’t wait for what’s to come for me and you in the future!

With love,

Lizzi 🦋

Ps: I’ve contemplated long and hard if I should do a follower celebration, but instead I’ve decided to show you who I am because this has become such a tight-knit community and I want you guys to know who’s actually sitting behind the screen 🫶🏻

If you want to see who I am and what makes me tick, there is more under the cut!

Thank you all for your support again. I love you!

Okay.

For those of you who don't know me, my name is Lisa and I am 20 years old. I was born on January 20th, 2003, I'm a Capricorn, and I am obsessed with Harry Styles, Stranger Things, One Direction, Taylor Swift, and of course,

Daredevil & especially Charlie Cox.

I'm not a native English speaker, I've just been learning it since I was six years old. I'm originally from Germany, but I am a huge traveler and I love London like it's my second home.

I want to start with a small room tour of the things that are dear to me…

1. Mini Charlie (which I got for @blackshadowswriter )

2. And then the wall of fame

3. My Etsy DD Poster

And 4. My Funko Pops

And this is me, I guess…

JUST KIDDING!

This is me trying out the Comic!Matt Outfit that I’ve been dying to try out with my new hair.

(I am a natural blonde)

And then here is just me in my natural habitat:

For one, me at the Harry Styles concert...

And then just regular old me today...

I've met Charlie Cox on December 3rd 2022 at Germa Comic Con and he was the nicest person EVER (he asked my name and shook my hand with both of his and I died!) I was also still blonde at the time, and my smile was so wide, it made my eyes disappear.

What else is there to know about me? Not much.

I am pierced, I have tattoos, and I'm me. That's all there is to it.

The question is, who wore it better?

I don't know, I'd say I win...

Thank you again!

I love you all so much <3

#follower celebration #lizzi talks #face reveal #matt murdock #daredevil #charlie cox #michael kinsella #just an appreciation post for all of you lovely people #and the fandoms #writers of tumblr #i am a real person #and i love you all #matt murdock cosplay #i guess #and these tags apply to me too:#matt murdock x reader #michael kinsella x reader

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ofswordsandsorcery · 1 year

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My thoughts on SHADOW & BONE S2

SHADOW AND BONE SEASON 2 SPOILERS BELOW THE CUT

GRISHA VERSE SPOILERS BELOW THE CUT

!!!!SPOILERS BELOW THE CUT!!!!

I wrote this while watching, so it's really chaotic

Also, I haven't read any of the books in a while, so forgive me for not remembering how to correctly write the names and probably forgetting stuff :D

YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED CLICK OFF THERE ARE SPOILERS HERE

Episode 1

A privateer actually, it's an important distinction

Take your fuckin shoes off the bed

TAMAR AND TOLYA FUCKING ICONIC

Episode 2

THE BOOK, IT'S LIVES OF SAITS, OH SAINTS IS IT BEAUTIFUL

"you live in a single moment I live in a thousand"

You're old as shit we get it

Nina Zenik is a fucking menace and I am SO living for it

Also, we love a queen that eats <3

Oh oh Nikolai trying to steal Mal's girlfriend i see

Tamar and Alina interaction ahsjsjsjsj

The bonding over being shu han???

Awww, i loveee themm

You are FANCY CARGO

I'M DYING

Wylan and Nikolai working together would be the end of the world as we know it

HE SAID THE LINE

HE SAID IMPROBABLE

I- I CAN'T OMGGG

I thought the girl working for Aleksander was Zoya for a sec and i was SO confused

Aww, Wylan he's beyond thrilled, he just doesn't show it love

FUTURE HUBBYYS

Jes getting his fucking hat before leaving is everything

Episode 3

Soaaring flyyyyinnn

Nikolai is one hell of an inventor

Jes and Wylan on a missionnn *in a singing voice*

Nina giving Kaz contra >>>

Ajsjyjsjsjs Prince Nikolai reveal i am jsksksjsj AN ICON, truly

You lying bastard

Whack

Even more iconic

David and Genyaaaaa

I love David

I'm still so incredibly mad

On an unrelated note: Lewis Tan is one fine man

A casting decision I actually love

Side eye to Nikolai

(sorry paddy, nothing against you, you are doing a wonderful job just really not how I imagined Nikolai to look at ALL)

Nadja meets Tamar

Brb, I'm going to turn in to a useless queer

Also, I love Aldrick

ZOYALINA ZOYALINA ZOYALINA

Fuck allies, you need a wife

I am so living for Wylan begrudgingly agreeing with Jes

Wylans horrified stare at the piano playing omg and the little flinch

"He's really good" lol

Jes is so falling in love with Wylan over his piano playing skills

That LOOK

YOU KNOW WHAT IM TALKING ABOUT THAT IS SO CUTE I'M CRYING

Uhhh, kaz inej fight lol

Let me bandage it for you even tho i am deadly afraid of touching skin

Ahhh, communication

Omg the subtle shaking? The fear in his eyes? Well done.

What's your telll?

The cane the limp, know ones ever smart enough to look for the real one????

It's not what you think??

Nina is like yeah, take your bullshitting elsewhere

Ahaaa

I LOVE seeing that friendship develop.

Shit at first dates lmao

Love you Nina

Kaz fighting scene omg

Badass.

Crow club takeover? What?

Y'all I wasn't prepared for this

So much is happening at once, help

Eww he licked the knife? Bah

Go Inej, get his ass..

THE HAIR FLIP

INEJ INEJ INEJ INEJ INEJJJJJ

BABES YOU'RE FUCKING BADASS

Wow the prayer

So much emotionnnn

Ajhsjsjsj

Vladim, what are you doing love

General Kirigan what the actual fuck

That.. Is your mom

The horror on David's face

I feel the same way tho

I HaVe a PrOPosAL

Shut up Nikolai, you're gonna get punched again and you're face is actually to pretty for that...

STOP IT. They're holding hands

I repeat THEY ARE HOLDING HANDS

This is a fucking emotional roller-coaster

I'm not going anywhere - walks away

Thanks Jes, for saying what i thought

Jesper you little fuck

Don't betray Wylan like that?

Wylan talking about how Alby isn't responsible for who his father is

Van Eck im FUCKING LOOKING AT YOU

Oh Mathias my poor boy <3 he seriously needs a hug...

What's your price? Nuh uh

Episode 4

Vasily you idiot

TAMARR <3

Razrusha'ya

Ruined? I AM NOT RUINED I AM RUINATION

Baghra the wise im cackling

I KINDA LIKE YOUR FACE?

Jes you can't just drop that casually and then move one as if fucking nothing happend????

No mourners no funerals and it's almost all of my babies

Nadjas impressed look at Tamar and her axes has me SOBBING

TOLYA WITH HIS BOOOK

LOVE

That was a long time ago

Yeah oops

Make him kneel make him kneel make him kneel omg

That whole scene is so fucking good i had to actually rewatch it multiple times before i could move on

Tolya and Tamar supremacy <3

Not The POETRYYY

Tamar and Tolya meeting the crows??? Holy shit

This has taken so many twists and turns and loopings what

You could... Come with me??

Wylans lil shrug???? I'm actually crying

Kit's acting in the confession scene? SPECTACULAR the glances, the lil eye roll before be gathers the full courage, the little waver in his voice when he does confess??

A WYLAN KISS? WHAT I DID NOT EXPECT THAT AT ALL

HELP

HELPPPPP

Maybe you need a reminder?? The laughs the giggles I'm going to spontaneously combust

Wtf kaz

I worry about you?

I can't have a weak link in my crew?

You're a bloody idiot, is what you are

Nina should kock some sense into that head of yours after what you just said you moron

I think Rollins knocked it outa ya

And king he shall be

Just not yet oops

Unhinged Genya? hell yes!!!!

Ahhh, Baghra, you sly fucker

Not Adrik

Not him

Please not him

Jesper, Inej and Nina solidarity

Jes loves the gossip so much ahahahah

Episode 5

Genya not wanting David to see her because she's afraid of what he'll think hurts my heart

Genyalina hug supremacy

Baghra said sobatchka

I'm crying. This is not the time but omh

YOU DON'T NEED FIXING

Damn right she doesn't.

Tolya looking at the bowl of food is literally me

NINA AND TOLYA BONDING OVER FOOD

NOT WHAT I THOUGHT I'D GET BUT NOW I NEED MORE, OH LORD

I'm not here for you whoops

Oh Jes, you said the wrong thing baby

Bhez Ju? It looks INCREDIBLE!!!

Tolya being like wtf is going on with you and wylan is gold

I know metal

David i love you

The gentle forehead press

What did you do to him

Tolya giving relationship advice to jesper avout wylan I'm going to cry

Nvm I'm actually already crying

Nina trying to talk to Kaz about tea had me laughing so hard

Tolya snacking all the time, we love it

Zoya honestly

Tolyas comment about soldiers, i love that

Episode 6

MAMA

I'm laughing so hard

Poor Mal

He doesn't deserve any of this

The thief is so beautiful

And she's so badass

SHE'S DOING A GRISHA VERSION OF BLOODBENDING??? THAT IS GENIUS

Lol she's giving it to Jesper

I think she knows he's a special one

Love her so much

Another Wesper kiss??? Also, Tolya's knowing face lmao

Mathias = slab of fur and i will not refer to him as anything else ever again

Episode 7

Why on earth is everyone losing their hands?

This is ridiculous

Let me introduce you to Inej - Badass of the Barrel

Uh oh is right you witch

The crows join, it's over you idiots

Not the cane, that's a sacrilege what you just did.

Sibling reunion I'm sobbing over that hug

Um, Mal u okay hun?

Episode 8

Not kaz giving his cane away what is happening???

My Man

MY MAN

Kaz and Tolya bonding over Poetry? Of all things? love it

Ah ah ah is that an upward lip tug i see Kaz?

Jes... Why did you ruin the moment like that?

There's six of you you morons

Just don't know it yet lovelies

Have i said i don't like Genya's eye thing? It just looks so cheap

He wants an investment lol

Kaz you fuking idiot

You actually have to say it you know

Oof, the I want- I want you

Gives me the same vibes as i love, i love, i love you

How many fucking flying ships do they have?

Nah wtf is this Inej & Tolya shit

What's with the suggestive camera angles, stop that

Actually, i like the sturmhond look on Mal

Inej on the boat taking over slaver ships

So many things i didn't think I'd see this season omg

Ketterdam what kinda fucked up, out of proportion moon do you have???

Ugh not the apparat

Fuck off already, i didn't miss you at ALL

For a man of faith...

Love you for that, sobachka

Finally a better eye patch

Zoya you actually could lol

Are we going to get a triumvirate sitch with Alina?

Omgg yesss

You finally gonna go to Fjerda huh

I AM SO LIVING FOR THE DRESSES

EXCEPT ZOYAS... WHERE'S THE SIGNATURE BLUE SILVER?

Not that it doesn't look good just...

Talk about show stopping, am i right

Well, that's a way to end the show

Additional things I LOVED

- The show name at the beginning of every episode

- The different languages >>>>

- everything Tolya does

-Patrick Gibson as Nikolai, the longer I watched the better it got

What I did NOT like:

- lots of things actually but I have decided for myself that from here I'll just see the show as something different from the books and cherish it for what it is

-David and Genya having literally five seconds before he died? WTF? David was supposed to be here longer :/

-that they put SO MUCH into this season? like so much is happening at once and then they introduce additional stuff??? Felt a little rushed to me... Like were kinda already at the point of King of Scars but at the same time the SOC plotline is so ripped apart? I am confused...

#shadow and bone #shadow and bone netflix #shadow and bone season 2 #spoilers #alina starkov #malyen oretsev #the darkling #kaz brekker #inej ghafa #jesper fahey #wylan van eck #the crows #six of crows #nina zenik #matthias helvar #waffles #how do i tag help

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ithseem · 1 year

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The Three Dimensions Exchange Week: Chapter 4

I did it. I finally finished the fourth chapter. @voltagefandomproject there's no way I can finish the entire fic before the deadline, but here you go anyways.

CW: slut-shaming with no basis, everyone dying inside. proceed with caution

previous chapter || next chapter

Chapter 4:

Diavolo and Barbatos were greeted by their guests looking uncomfortable when they came to pick their guests up and escort them to the House of Lamentation. Did they already dislike being in the Devildom? Aquia assured him that how they feel has nothing to do with being here. “I shan’t say the actual reason. Just please take my word that none of us dislike being here,” he said. He didn’t dare say that he didn’t want to disclose the actual reason was because Y/N was within earshot of them. “Alright,” Diavolo replied, however only somewhat satisfied knowing that he spoke the truth.

By the time they had arrived at the House of Lamentation, Saima had already thrown herself onto her friends and gave them all a hug. Joanne did the same with her friends too. “You have NO idea how much I wanted to do that,” Saima said.

“I’m truly happy to see you again, child of man,” Malleus replied.

Ace: “For real! It has been a minute.”

Sherry and Rio were especially happy to see Joanne too. “I still can’t believe We managed to pull off getting you all here. And I was part of it!” Joanne said.

Parvana chuckled and then ushered the group into the living room where they continued to mingle with one another, now with the Demon Brothers, the Purgatory Hall gang, Diavolo and Barbatos. Y/N tried to join them, but she tripped over her own shoes. She braced herself for the impact, but she never came on contact with the unwaxed floor. She looked up to see Jack’s bemused expression. “Maybe you need a new pair of shoes?” he said.

“T-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-thank y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-you f-f-for catching m-m-m-m-me,” she said as her face reddened.

Azul, Ace, and Saima exchanged wide-eyed glances that did not go unnoticed. “What’s that expression for?” Simeon asked. “All Jack did was help a person out.” He wasn’t the only one who was confused, and he certainly wasn’t the only one who had a bad feeling about this. A loud rumbling interrupted the atmosphere, stopping whatever train of thought anyone had at this interaction.

“Ah,” Rio said. “I’m feeling a bit peckish.”

“I almost forgot why we invited you over in the first place,” said Lucifer. “Come into the dining room. The food’s going to get cold.”

To call the dinner a bizarre experience would put it quite lightly. Out of politeness, Simeon tried to strike up a conversation with Y/N, and it would have been normal if not for the incessant stuttering, “shyly” tucking her hair behind her ear every other sentence, and the constant slander of the popular girls at her old school. The layer of discomfort made it all the more difficult to enjoy the dinner.

“I-i-i-i-i-i-i-it’s t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-true,” she stuttered. “T-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-they always m-m-m-m-m-make f-f-f-f-f-f-fun of me for n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-not b-b-b-b-b-being l-l-l-l-like t-t-t-them. I-I-I-I-I’m n-n-n-not a s-s-s-s-s-slut.”

Lance made a face as if to say "bullshit."

“Apparently, the stuttering isn’t a speech impediment,” Lance whispered to Simeon. “I’m afraid I don’t know what it is.”

“Maybe I should get a bag of rice?” said Leviathan, not hiding the fact that he was about to laugh. “She’s lagging like crazy.”

“Come on, be nice,” said Parvana. “No matter HOW insufferable she can be. I wouldn’t discourage calling out her nonsense, though.”

Y/N: Uhhhh? T-t-t-t-thanks?

Barbatos came to the rescue again by changing the subject. “By the by, how are you enjoying your stay in the Devildom? I realize it’s only been a few hours, but I’d really like to know.”

Malleus: “In the short time we’ve been here, I’ve come to quite enjoy myself. Partially because I get to see an old friend again. The atmosphere here seems really nice too. We’ve run into a couple of students upon our arrival, and they seemed quite welcoming.”

Sherry: “Indeed! I’m quite looking forward to meeting some new people, myself. And getting to know all of you better seems like a capital place to start.”

Diavolo: “Excellent! If you’re this enthusiastic about the program, I’m sure this will all go swimmingly.”

Saima: “I most sincerely hope so.”

At this point, hoping is all there is left to do.

#court of darkness #voltage fandom ccc #obey me shall we date #obey me barbatos #ace trappola #azul ashengrotto #court of darkness x reader #sherry invidia #aquia avari #lance ira #malleus draconia #jack howl #y/n slander #twisted wonderland x reader #obey me x reader #rio voleri

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loneamaryllis · 2 years

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*Masterlist of my writings*

Harry Potter

Snarriet (Female Harry/Snape):

Harrie's cat: The war is over. Voldemort is dead, and so is Snape. Harrie came back to Hogwarts to teach Defense. One night, she comes across a wounded cat...

Black & Gold: a post-war fic with the foursome pairing Harrie/Snape/Ron/Hermione. Some smut, some plot, some Snape being Snape and adding tension as he finds his place within the Golden Trio.

In his embrace: a Voldemort wins AU, where he keeps Harrie as a pet and then offers her to Snape. Mostly Snape/Harrie, but there's also some Harrymort, and a few Snarrietmort threesome scenes.

Saving Snape: a post Second Wizarding war fic. Severus Snape is receiving death threats, and Auror Harrie Potter volunteers to protect him. Lots of sexual tension, classic Snarry bickering, and some smut.

Caught in the act: a very smutty threesome fic, Lupin/Snape/Harrie, with an emphasis on the Snape/Harrie. Happens during an alternate sixth year, with Lupin as the DADA teacher again.

Harrie and her Alpha: An A/B/O fic. Harrie needs an Alpha and Snape happens to be the only one available. They both hate it, until they don't. (Started as a crack fic and then got serious.)

Snape's cat: A short fic that's a mix between crack and fluff, with a little bit of smut on the side. Harrie's Animagus form is a cat. Snape is a cat person.

blades, clashing (hearts, burning): a Star Wars AU. Snape is a Sith tasked with hunting down Harrie. Expect a lot of sexual tension, as well as the Enemies to Lovers and Hate Sex tropes.

The Haunting of Harrie Potter: a oneshot that starts after the final battle, which ended the canon way, with Snape dying. Now Harrie takes care of his grave. Except someone keeps disturbing the flowers there...

Harrie's kinky adventures: my Kinktober fic for 2023. Snarriet and Harrymort, sometimes with dark themes.

And there's a lot of Snarriet oneshots, too many to all link them here!

Harrymort:

(Ongoing) Precious Horcrux: A Voldemort!wins AU with a female!Harry, and the Harry/Voldemort pairing. Originally a oneshot, and then I wrote more, so there's non-consensual sex right there in the first chapter. Very dark. (Slow to update)

Blood red: a Muggle AU where Voldemort is a serial killer. (Also, he's old.) Harriet would like to be left alone. Voldemort thinks she's so very interesting.

Ourobouros: a oneshot where Harrie has gone back in time and is being watched very closely by Professor Riddle... Dark fic.

Fem!Neville/Snape:

A brave little Gryffindor: Neve (Fem!Neville) tries to steal the Sword of Gryffindor and ends up being punished by Snape. Contains a lot of dirtybadwrong smut and an ending with a surprise threesome pairing.

The rest:

Enlightened (The Flash): A genderswapped AU of Season 4 in which DeVoe manages to Enlighten the world and keeps a female Barry as his prisoner. First person POV, lots of mind control, plenty of time travel, some Barrie/Thawne thrown in, and a happy ending.

Night of Hell (Fighting Fantasy): A narrated playthrough of House of Hell with added smut. Second person POV, the reader fails a lot but succeeds in the end.

A Helping Hand (Doctor Strange and the Multiverse of Madness): A Corrupted!Stephen fic with the America Chavez/Stephen Strange pairing. America is 18 and the sex is consensual, until the corruption from the Darkhold really gets out of hand.

Brought Down Low (Various fandoms): A series of oneshots in which heroines lose the final battle of their stories. The big bads enjoy their victory.

Broken Wings (Original Work): A young woman with a secret vigilante identity tries to take down the most powerful man of the city. It doesn't go well. (A oneshot for now, will be continued later.)

*Things to come*

Check out the #wip tag!

It's all Snape Snape Snape I'm afraid:

A bunch of Fem!Harry/Snape fics: some dark, some not, some short, some not

One dark Reader/Snape

#my writings

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midnightprelude · 11 months

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Senseless, Pt. 3

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Finally, three years later, I tested positive for COVID-19. Of course, I couldn't suffer alone, so @oftachancer humored me in inflicting the disease on Dorian so we could write Anders taking care of him (and falling in love). This is a 4-part fic which will post daily! You can follow the #senseless da fic to get updates. Written for @30daysofdorian!

He liked me. I’d known he liked men, of course. That was exceptionally obvious and, as Dorian seemed well aware, subtlety wasn’t what he was known for. Varric had once told me that he was all flash and no heat. But Varric hadn’t been standing by his bed last night when Dorian had thought I was asking him to go down- No. If he’d seen the glint in Dorian’s eyes and the slow, measured study as it went from considering to craving, he’d never have claimed Dorian was without heat.

Even with a fever, the man had a way about him. He made slumping over the kitchen table look like performance art.

“I cannot feel my face,” he whimpered, poking his cheek with a spoon. “Is it still there?”

“Still there,” I chuckled, pulling the kettle off the stove as soon as it began to whistle. “Cinnamon apple or orange cardamom?”

“Cardamom.” Dorian traced his brow with the curve of the spoon. “What would you normally be doing right now?”

“Now?” I glanced over at the clock. Half past eight. “I’d still be sleeping or I’d be working.”

“You don’t have to stay up with me. You can sleep.”

“I will after you do.” I poured the steaming water over the herbs, letting them steep in Dorian’s mug. I passed it to him. “What would you typically be doing?”

“Swimming.” Dorian wrapped his hands around the mug. “Sleeping in, if there’s no pool nearby.”

Swimming. I imagined there were a great many people who would pay a lot of money to watch that. No wonder he was in such good shape. I hadn’t been to a gym since high school, and it showed. “I haven’t had much time for hobbies lately.”

“No, I wouldn’t imagine so,” he paused and buried his face behind his elbow to cough. “I was surprised you answered.”

“I’d just gotten off.” I puttered about the kitchen, looking for something that would be easy for Dorian to eat. Why did everything he owned seem to have so many spices? “Lucky timing.”

“Lucky, indeed.” I could feel him watching me. “Nevertheless. Do you still have that garden on your balcony?”

“…more or less.”

“I remember you talking about your marigolds.”

“My poor plants have seen better days, I’m afraid.” Half of them were dead or dying. “No time, you see.”

“I do.” He plucked at the string of the tea bag, wiggling it absently. “Could I impose upon you further, do you think?”

“Hm?” I wondered, turning back to face him. “How so?”

“One of my downstairs maids takes care of all of my indoor plants. She times it when I’m out, so we don’t cross paths, but… she could use the hours. Perhaps I could send her to tend to yours as well.”

“…my garden?” I blinked, staring at him.

“She’s very good. You should see the conservatory.”

“Conservatory.” Why was I still surprised. “Ah- Okay. I can’t-“

“Thank you. I appreciate your willingness to help. The poor girl is bored to tears these days with the lockdown.”

“I was going to say: I can’t afford to pay her. I’ve still got loans-“

Dorian waved a hand. “Not at all what I was suggesting. I have direct deposit for her. She simply refuses to take donations.”

“Oh. Yes.” I felt my cheeks warm again and I thought of the thick wad of cash I’d failed to fit into my wallet. “That would be- Thank you. Some of those plants I’ve had for ages; my rosemary was from a plant I had with me in Ferelden.”

“Write down your instructions. She’ll take good care of them, I’m sure.” Dorian sipped from the mug and sniffed. “Perhaps the tea is old? I can order more.”

“…what?”

“Nothing. It’s usually stronger.” He shrugged. “Perhaps it’s the way Dorothea brews it. I can ask her.”

I studied him curiously. “…can you not taste it?”

“Nor smell it. Not to worry. The heat is pleasant on my throat.”

“Ah-“ I could smell the spices from across the room. I brought the glass jar filled with herbs and orange peels to him, opening it under his nose. “Can you smell this?”

Dorian sniffed, glancing up. “See what I mean? Off. Perhaps the seal is broken. I’ll add it to the list.”

I shook my head, frowning. “I can, though.” I pointed to the far window. “From over there.”

His lashes fluttered and he frowned, sniffing and sipping again. “It isn’t enough that I’m sweating like a desert gardener?”

“I’m sorry, Dorian.” I winced, taking the loose leaf away. “Losing your senses of smell and taste can be one of the symptoms. They should come back after a few weeks.”

“A few- I apologize, a few weeks? I thought you said this would pass in a few days.” He rubbed his hands over his face. “It’s worse? Am I getting worse? I don’t think I can spend another few weeks in this house, Anders. I’ll go stir crazy.”

“Most of your symptoms should be better in a few days,” I began, cautiously. “Then you should be able to get back to work. Though I don’t think there’s really an end in sight for the lockdown, if I’m being quite honest. Is that- Are you- I know a good therapist if you’d like a referral.” Merrill was just as swamped as he was, but was also just as willing to make exceptions for Varric’s friends. “Let’s just focus on today, alright? Where do you keep breakfast things?”

“…breakfast things,” he repeated, massaging the bridge of his nose. “I order from Al Pano’s, two blocks past the gates. Lisetta does bike runs.”

“You don’t- You don’t cook here?” I turned in a slow circle around the massive kitchen. “Why do you have this, then?”

“I have a chef. Wilson. He’s exquisite. The things he can do with a single egg would make your eyes roll in your head.”

“…does he keep any eggs here?” I wondered, wandering towards the walk-in fridge. I opened the heavy door with a grunt, my voice echoing. “Milk?”

“He hasn’t been here since the lockdown,” Dorian said between sips of his tea. “Thus: Al Pano’s. Do you need milk and eggs? I can order them. I do have a wonderful array of cigars and brandy.”

“Cigars and brandy aren’t breakfast.”

Dorian tutted. “Anything can be anything.”

“You don’t need to be smoking when you can barely keep from coughing as it is.”

“Hmph.” Dorian rose slowly from his seat and crossed to the empty refrigerator. “What do you need.”

I sighed, returning to him. “Maybe Al Pano’s for today. I’ll make you a list.”

“Milk and eggs.” He knocked on the refrigerator door twice, swaying on his feet and catching himself against the wall, shaking his head. “Now the room is spinning. I do not like a spinning room.”

I blinked, staring at the refrigerator as it began to overflow with white oblong spheres, apparently cascading out of the back wall on a river of milk. Eggs. Milk and eggs. I pulled Dorian out of the way and slammed the door to the refrigerator shut as milk sloshed against the window. I turned to him, eyes wide. “What?”

His beautiful eyes were rolled back, his breaths short and quick as he held onto the wall. “I’m afraid I might faint soon. I apologize in advance.”

I wrapped my arms around his waist, holding him as steady as I could manage as he slumped, unconscious, into my arms.

With some considerable effort, I managed to carry him to a sofa in the other room, my shoulders aching by the time I sat down next to him. Gods, but he was powerful. Even delirious and drugged, I could practically taste the magic seeping out of him now that he’d used it. Like the air after a thunderstorm, electric and intoxicating.

“Dorian?” I rested my hand against his forehead, waiting for his eyelashes to flutter open again.

“Hello,” he mumbled. “I’m on the sofa.”

“You were about to fall.”

“You can’t keep me out of your lap,” he slurred, sly.

“Why would anyone want to?” I wondered, honestly.

Dorian laughed, resting his cheek on my thigh. “An excellent point.”

“No more spellcasting until your fever is gone,” I murmured, brushing a stray curl from his brow. “We’ll just order food from your apps. Can you handle that?”

“It didn’t go well?” he asked, eyes fluttering closed.

“You passed out.” I reminded him gently. “So no, not really.”

“I don’t believe I’ve ever been this tired.” Dorian shivered, the pajama shirt clinging to him with sweat.

“Good. Your body is trying to tell you it needs time to heal.” I touched his cheek gingerly. “Phone?”

He fumbled in his pocket for the device and handed it to me. Even his exhales had a crackle to them: thick, slow breaths. “Thank you.”

“Mmhmm.” I navigated to the app, scanning through the menu. Delicious looking flaky pastries, tartes, toasted sandwiches with eggs or jam. I ordered a few things from his previous orders along with some pastries for myself, letting Dorian doze on me until the order was ready.

The Maker only knew what we were supposed to do with a fridge full of eggs floating in milk.

The doorbell sounded a moment before a text came through to announce the arrival of breakfast and I guided Dorian back to the kitchen to prepare his breakfast and then mine on smooth filigreed plates.

Dorian ate the jammy eggs and toast with a sorrowful expression, occasionally sniffing at things with a grimace. “Weeks,” he mumbled, then looked to me. “How is it?”

“Delicious. Not as good as your Wilson, maybe, but good.” I smiled, resting my chin on my hand, sipping from the excellent coffee Dorian had offered me last night. “There are some studies that suggest breathing in strong scents like lemon and coffee for twenty seconds, thinking of memories you associate with them can help recover your senses.” I shrugged. “It couldn’t hurt.”

“I thought you didn’t want me drinking coffee,” he tucked the blanket around his shoulders a little closer, coughing into the washcloth again.

“Not drinking it. Just trying to smell it.”

Dorian cleared his throat, leaning over to breathe the steam from my cup. “I know what it should smell like. Have you visited Antiva?”

“No, never. I’m assuming you have?”

Dorian grunted quietly, sitting back. “At least once a year. I have to keep my tan somehow.”

“I’ve, on multiple occasions, gotten sunburned while driving,” I admitted. “I’m not much of one for sand, either. It gets all up in your bits and you end up pouring it out of your shoes for weeks.”

“That’s a simple pair of wards.”

I rubbed my nose absently. “Simple for a man who summoned a lake of milk out of thin air, maybe.”

Dorian’s brow furrowed. “I’m out of sorts.”

“When you’re not, I imagine you’re a force to be reckoned with.”

“Ah. Well.” He shrugged, a timid smile curving his lips. “Yes, on all fronts.”

“Including modesty?” I wondered.

“Obviously.” His smile widened, bright white teeth below a ferociously red nose. “I am the most humble person I know. You could say I pride myself on it.”

I rolled my eyes with a chuckle. “You do somehow manage to pull it off.”

“Being exceptional has always been my curse to bear,” he sighed dolefully. “Apparently even my viruses are exceptional.”

It didn’t seem right to mention that his case seemed to be moderate, at worst, so I simply smiled and nodded, waiting for him to finish picking at his plate. “Do you have any idea what you want to do today? I could download some audiobooks from the library or pick up a puzzle or…?”

“A puzzle… I do have a puzzle box that’s been in my family for generations. I suppose I could try opening it. Although I imagine what’s inside of it might be best remaining locked away.”

“Ah… Maybe a movie, then?” They already had enough messes on their hands as it was. “Or a nap? How are you feeling now that you’ve eaten?”

“Tired,” Dorian admitted, “although I’ve been tired since I woke. It’s an unsettling sensation.” He blew his nose heartily into the cloth. “We do have a viewing room. I’ve only used it for presentations.”

“…a viewing room? What’s a viewing room?”

Dorian looked at me as though he were trying to deduce a complex answer to a complex question. “A room… in which one views things?” he inquired, nasal and stuffed up and scraggly. I’d never seen him without a hair out of place and the last hours I’d watched a slow progression of hair curling wildly and beard growing and wondered if that polished perfection weren’t in place to protect us from the chaos of his handsomeness. “You mentioned a film. We have a collection. I’ve not watched any of them, but I’ve been assured they’re all rather exemplary examples of their genres.”

“…you’ve never-“ I stared at him, completely befuddled. “And who are you referring to when you say ‘we’? I thought you said you were here alone?”

“We. The house.” He waved vaguely. “And, I suppose, you, as you are currently in the house. Have I mentioned how very nice it is to have you in the house?”

“Not in those exact words, though you did seem rather grateful last night.” I smiled, watching him gesture. Every movement was so smooth and elegant, even the way he brushed crumbs off of his corner of the kitchen table. He liked me. Dorian Pavus liked me. Maybe he was just sick and lonely- But he said he’d liked me before. So maybe it was real, after all. Maybe. “I don’t mind hearing you say it, though.”

“Well, it is nice.” Dorian sniffled, lifting his chin. “It is not quite the circumstances I would have chosen, I will admit, for your visit or your preference to an enjoyable evening, but we must make do.”

“Must we?” I wondered, blinking slowly. “I’m having a great time. You look extremely endearing with a chapped nose, all tousled and unkempt. I’m almost inclined to take a picture.”

“Gods above and below, I beg you not to. I am hoping very sincerely you will forget that I can look like this.”

“Really? That’d be a shame.” I winked, chuckling to myself. “You’re cute when you’re needy.”

“If you like that,” he paused to cough, “you’ll love me. I have been informed I am very needy indeed.”

“Who told you that?”

“My family. My tutors. I’m afraid it’s part of why I am in this confounded situation in the first place. Poor Collette is also quite needy and my teachers were often one of my main sources of solace at her age.”

“So you’re needy and compassionate.” I clutched my chest. “Oh, Dorian, you’re going to make me swoon.”

“I have tried to do so previously only to be very much rebuffed.”

“Have you. The times you asked me out, or others?”

“What others could there be? I’ve only seen you the twice.”

“I suppose that’s on me.” I shook my head, giddy. “I guess I didn’t think it was possible you’d actually want to go out with me.”

Dorian squinted at him, rubbing his nose with a salve. “Do people often ask you out without the desire to do so?”

“No, I mean-” I laughed again, shaking my head. “No, they don’t. It’s just- I’ve never in my life been asked out by someone who looks like you.” I ran a hand through my hair, which fell loose against my cheeks. “Can you forgive me?”

“Forgive you for what?” Dorian sniffled, gathering his apparently tasteless tea to himself. “Not having been asked out by men who look like me? There aren’t any. I am uniquely blessed by my genetics.”

“You are,” I agreed, smiling warmly. “Dinner from your favorite restaurant the next time I’m off and you’re back on your feet? And maybe- if you’re up for it- I do miss dancing.”

“Dancing I can do.” Dorian held out a hand. “I could dance now. How’s your waltz?”

“Probably not as good as yours, but I can follow a decent lead.” I rested mine atop his lightly. “You’re sure you’re feeling well enough? I don’t want you to get dizzy-“

He shook his head. “That’s the benefit of a slow dance,” he assured me, rising as he drew me over to him. Hand on my waist, his palm dry and warm against my own. Dorian glanced between my eyes. “Alright?”

It was my turn to feel oddly warm and dizzy. I nodded slowly, my gaze not leaving his. Glints of gold hid among the edges of his starlit eyes and I sighed. “Lead on, Maestro.”

“Maestro,” he chuckled. “Hardly. Altus, yes. Sorcerer, yes. Devastatingly handsome, obviously.” Dorian leaned in, brushing his nose gently against mine. He smelled of spices and herbs. His nose was still damp from the salve. “I would like the dinner. And the date. Thank you.”

“You’ll have it,” I promised, knowing in that moment, with my heart fluttering like it’d gone and grown wings, I’d have promised much, much more. “Third time's a charm.”

#senseless da fic #dorian pavus #anders #dorianders #dragon age fanfiction #midnight writes #oftachancer writes #30daysofdorian

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