#but yes those two lovely fools are my candidates for
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My brain has, like everyone else, been going "brrr" on the mention of a "heartwrenching ending" that was mentioned for "one of the characters".
For the most part, I agree that a lot of signs point to Astarion being the unfortunate character to potentially have an unfortunate ending, but I'd argue any of our companions has the capability, given they're all entangled in some crazy shit, with maybe the exception of Lae'zel (let's be real, her quest is honestly fairly straight forward, excluding the tadpole situation). All that said, another character comes to mind as being the other candidate for being the tragic one: Karlach.
She's got Zariel to contend with, on top of the whole "I have a blazing infernal engine in my chest" deal. Zariel's no joke, and I'm not sure how we (the players) are meant to deal with Karlach's issue of being a runaway slave to her. Granted, there's the possibility the Archduchess of Avernus will simply not give a shit and be too busy fighting the Blood War to care about one soldier, but still. Karlach's got a hell of an issue (pun somewhat intended) there that could backfire spectacularly and tragically. In the case of the Engine, maybe even literally.
With Astarion, he's got... a lot. There's the potential of betrayal, sure. That one is obvious. He could betray our Tav, of course, and that would suck. But, I'm more focused on other little beats. Someone brought up the potential to reverse the process of becoming a vampire spawn with the caveat of the spawn not being enthralled for more than 200 years, which it's possible that's an angle Astarion will attempt to take and be cruelly surprised by (ie "Surprise! You're stuck like this"). There's also the fact that he's got some sort of seal on his back, something we still haven't even the foggiest clue could mean. And, perhaps in relation to that, Astarion's got more than just Cazador after him, for reasons unknown. For all we know, Cazador auctioned off Astarion's body and soul in exchange for some mysterious boon, and we won't find out until it kicks in. There are so many ways his story can go tits up, despite his (and/or our) best efforts.
Basically, what I'm saying is that both Astarion and Karlach, in my opinion, have the biggest "Everything can go right, and you can still lose" energy.
#haldie rambles#astarion#karlach#ultimately just me rambling and spinfoiling#hell that heartwrenching bit could've been in relation to multiple characters and a choice we make#we don't know#and that's the beauty of it#but yes those two lovely fools are my candidates for#“Voted Most Likely to Have Something Awful Happen to Them In Spite of Everything”
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your instagram when dating spencer reid
inspired by @/happiesthotch @/hotchaways :)
Liked by garciagirlie, alexblake and 374 others
ssa(y/n) love his clown feet 🫶🏼
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spencephd love her baby feet ❤️
rossisrotini I didn’t know they could be nice to each other
→ jjareau she texted me after posting this and said he slam dunked her with a pillow
→ ms_emilyp @/ssa(y/n) use two exclamation points if you need help
→ ssa(y/n) HELP‼️‼️‼️‼️
→ agenthotch wheels up in 20, you heard her
d.morgan oh to see pretty boys feet
→ ssa(y/n) my eyes only 😡😡
→ spencephd im not sure how to feel about this
→ garciagirlie I could get you photos of lots of feet
→ agenthotch I think we need to have a talk about this
→ garciagirlie i meant my feet with fresh new nail polish* 😁
→ agentahotch 😐
liked by therealellew, jjareau and 427 others
ssa(y/n) pov garcia & morgan are on the phone
view all 33 comments
garciagirlie where’s my chocolate thunder
→ d.morgan right here baby girl 😏
→ spencephd we can’t escape them
→ ssa(y/n) but we can do worse ;)
→ ms_emilyp @/agentahotch do something about this
→ agenthotch no
rossisrotini I beg of you both to not become like them
→ spencephd now you’re just tempting us to do worse 🤷♂️
→ ssa(y/n) I await those glorious hands of yours, doctor
→ jjareau what have we started
→ ssa(y/n) ITS FOR A MASSAGE CHILL 😭
→ d.morgan could’ve fooled me tbh
liked by itsmattsimmons, d.morgan and 503 others
ssa(y/n) someone didn’t pass the physical fit test
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d.morgan is he looking for a trainer 👀👀
→ garciagirl no. never again with you.
→ spencephd literally leave
→ jjareau we’re doing just fine without you 😘
ms_emilyp reid looking to outrun his paperwork
→ ssa(y/n) more like reid running to catch some bitches
→ spencephd so I’m chasing after you?
→ ssa(y/n) 😡😡
agenthotch who’s not doing paperwork 🤨
→ rossisrotini exposed like the lazy kids you are
liked by spencephd, agenthotch and 292 others
ssa(y/n) got my bitch <3
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Spencephd 😐
→ ssa(y/n) notice how you didn’t correct me
→ spencephd can’t even tie her own shoes smh
→ ssa(y/n) LMAOOO that’s what you’re for SIMP
garciagirlie the love birds are at it again
→ jjareau love birds sounds more like enemies these days
→ d.morgan isn’t that the fun in it?
→ ssa(y/n) yes, he literally just threw the shoe at my face 😇
rossisrotini @/agenthotch got another case for ya
→ ms_emilyp that’s the sound of the police reid 🚨
→ spencephd you know statistically, it takes the police an average of 7 minutes to get to the scene. I could be long gone by then.
→ d.morgan I can hear him through my phone
→ spencephd :)
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ssa(y/n) candid of my favorite nerd 🤭
view all 31 comments
spencephd I’ve been exposed 😟
→ ssa(y/n) wanna be exposed in a different way?
d.morgan looks like we got competition @/garciagirlie
→ garciagirlie 😏 been exposed for years to you baby
ms_emilyp 🤢 I’m moving back to london fr
→ jjareau take me with 🙏🏼🙏🏼
→ garciagirlie GIRLS TRIP
→ ssa(y/n) LETS GO
→ ms_emilyp not you ❤️
rossisrotini 🥂 cheers you two but keep it in your pants
→ ssa(y/n) hard to when he’s this fine 😫
→ spencephd actually die
agenthotch this is what we call a hostile work environment
→ d.morgan you weren’t even there for that hotch
→ agentahotch I have my ways
→ garciagirlie please don’t bring back such traumatizing memories
→ jjareau clearly we need to have this conversation again
— END —
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a/n finally got around to writing some criminal minds stuff 😫
#spencer reid#dr reid#dr spencer reid#spencer reid x self insert#spencer reid x fem!readr#spencer reid x y/n#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid x you#criminal minds#criminal minds x reader#derek morgan#aaron hotchner#jennifer jareau#penelope garcia#david rossi#emily prentiss#criminal minds x y/n#spencer reid headcanon#spencer reid imagine#spencer reid fic
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Some unsorted (initial, I guess) retrospective thoughts on The Magician Who Loved a Fake.
First of all, Magician revisits a lot of themes and plot elements from Ashiyama’s two older doujins, Imaginative Power of Meiji ✕✕ (Reimu’s youth and struggle with her role) and especially Koushin Night (Marisa’s relationship with her dad, and even the part where she makes medicine for him). The final battle in Magician happening on the night of Koushin is a very blatant callback there. They don’t fit into the same continuity or anything, but I highly recommend reading them after Magician if you hadn’t read them before. They’re good.
===================
I loved (heh) how the meaning of the title kept getting expanded on. Is the “fake” that Marisa loves magic itself? Her dream? Her lifestyle? Herself? Reimu? Her image of Reimu? And whatever it is, will she still love it by the end? In the end, the answer was “yes” to all of those. If you’re gonna told me you took it for granted that Reimu was a candidate for the position of “fake” too, well, good for you I guess. But for me, that dawning realization was one of my favorite moments in reading this series.
Similarly, I enjoyed how at least my own impression of what the plot was “about” shifted over time. Of course, on a surface level, there’s the Magician Incident, but it’s never really sold as a huge deal in and of itself: it’s probably pretty clear from the start that it’s a lead-in to something more important. By Chapter 2, you’re led to think that the main conflict might be about Marisa becoming or threatening to become a youkai magician. “Reimu deals with Marisa becoming a youkai” is one of the most iconic and well-established plots in the Touhou fandom, with a lot of different takes, but possibly a risk of oversaturation as a result - at least as someone who’s translated a lot of them. I can’t help but wonder if that was a conscious reason that it ended up being teased and then subverted here.
Even as the story mainly focuses on them dealing with the Magician Incident, which starts developing new twists, the threat of a more important personal conflict looms in the background where Marisa has pushed it. In Chapter 9, the crisis of Marisa becoming a magician is suddenly and completely replaced by her personal crisis over not being one anymore. Reimu acts seemingly aloof about it at first, but by Chapter 11, Marisa has kind of settled into the new status quo while the story suddenly becomes about Reimu’s crisis over it – more or less the polar opposite of the conflict foreshadowed since Chapter 2, and of the usual trope. I think part of the reason Marisa settles into the village life is that Reimu is still there. When she disappears, Marisa misses Reimu first and foremost, and magic as the proxy that allows her to be with Reimu (as she admits out loud in Chapter 12).
Gensokyo of Humans did something slightly similar, with how the acute problem of Akyuu’s memory loss and impending death - while still serious - gave way to her much deeper misgivings about her lot in life. Although, in GoH’s case these problems were closely intertwined and mostly ran side-by-side rather than replacing one another as a twist, so it’s not the exact same or anything.
Even though Ashiyama’s on Twitter joking “Fooled you! This was a ReiMari manga from the start!” I think you can’t in all honesty call that a last-minute twist or rug pull or anything, as some people have taken it almost in bad faith. While it was arguably up in the air until Ch. 11 or so whether Reimu and Marisa’s relationship would be at the center of the story or not, I think by then it became well-established as the actual point of conflict (though as I explained above, it was there from the start).
In a related manner, from the very first cover page and announcement, the story is presented as an action-packed adventure manga. I don’t know how much of this was just marketing, but by SCoOW standards, it wasn’t wrong: at first, every chapter features at least one major combat scene. Thus the end of Chapter 8 is felt even on a meta level as the action comes to an end with a crunch and disappears from the story entirely. Marisa and Reimu’s grief over the loss of her magic is made a lot more real by the fact that much like Marisa’s life, the manga’s whole genre takes a shift (arguably towards something more normal for Ashiyama). Of course, Magician was never trying to present itself as an exaggeratedly happy-go-lucky shounen that would make this come across as an attempt at shock-value genre deconstruction or anything; but the complete disappearance of action from the manga reflects its disappearance from Marisa’s life in a way that wouldn’t come across if we’d never been shown that action to begin with. Of course, it’s still understandable to be annoyed by that if you preferred the action.
Personally, I absolutely liked the action scenes too, but they were maybe a little detached, and this shift made it easier to become invested in the emotional core of the story. (Of course, it also happened at the same time that the story became more emotional in general, so it’s hard to separate correlation and causation there.) And naturally, the final battle was great, both in its presentation and what it represented for Marisa as a character at that point. The way she’s forced to fight now - yet fights, and wins nonetheless - provides a big contrast for how she fought early in the series, when she was the second most powerful human in Gensokyo.
===================
Speaking of the “final” battle, let’s address what to me feels like something of an elephant in the room: similar to GoH, Magician has kind of a two-climax structure, where the story hits its first peak a bit earlier but then still needs to carry that energy forward to a second peak. Objectively that space between peaks is only like one chapter here, but it ends up feeling a lot longer. I was surprised but glad to see the inquisitor and witch’s story brought back and tied into the current one, but in retrospect, the pacing does suffer because of the page space dedicated to it then and there, when the story should be riding every bit of momentum from the final battle to the emotionally more significant ReiMari reunion.
While giving every bit of benefit of the doubt regarding the realities of working on a monthly manga, the squeezed pacing of the final chapter is the clearest criticism I have for this series. While it maybe says everything it needs to say - much of it being Marisa and Reimu telling each other what they have already told the audience, which is important - emotionally, it doesn’t work as well as it could, and kinda leaves the reader to expand on it in their own head. Having to digest an ending isn’t a bad thing, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t true it lacked some oomph.
In GoH’s case, the emotional resolution came first and then had a relatively smooth falling-action slide into the practical resolution. Here it kinda felt like the other way around, and didn’t work out as well. This model/theory I keep talking about might well be flawed and overly based on comparisons to GoH, though.
===================
Marisa’s stay at her father’s includes multiple other characters speaking with authority about how it’s a good thing, basically trying to decide her life for her the way her father used to. However, Byakuren and Kourin are both only projecting their own attitudes onto her and acting sanctimonious about it without really understanding either her background or her present situation. Byakuren of course is an outsider in general, and her armchair psychology and talk of filial piety come across as rather out of touch, but even Kourin, who ought to know Marisa pretty well and in many ways does, has his head too far up his behind to see Marisa’s lifestyle as anything but an imitation of himself, caused by his influence. He takes it upon himself to “fix” it by forcing her back home, and even decides that he must disappear from Marisa’s life entirely or she’ll follow him back to the wrong path again like the child she is. Even above that infantilizing attitude, him deciding to abandon Marisa for good would probably have hurt her more than anything else he’d done, possibly a far worse abandonment than that by her father.
Kourin does throw in valid and I’m sure honest concerns about things like Marisa hurting herself (she was indeed acting irrational and self-destructive - though her literal suicide attempt only came after his and Reimu’s abandonment), but it’s hard to see his other behavior as grounded in anything but personal bias. Whether or not this is intentional and without drawing too strict connections between different doujins, his behavior here and in Imaginative Power of Meiji ✕✕ makes it look like he has a streak of putting Reimu and Marisa in bad situations just to satisfy his own self-righteous moral of the story, even though he’s always been the closest, most trusted adult for both of them.
I’m generally not the type to demand that characters get their “comeuppance”, but man, Byakuren at least admitted (in her mind) that she was manipulating Marisa. Even though I find this Kourin really interesting as a character, I couldn’t help but want some kinda acknowledgment - be it by himself or by someone else - that he was kind of a prick. I wish his and Marisa’s reunion had been shown rather than happen between scenes, at least.
===================
All in all, Ashiyama delivers. I really liked the manga from beginning to end, and can only really say I’m disappointed in the ending’s pacing. The story was emotional, emotionally satisfying, and interesting in ways I didn’t even get into here, like the different magicians who got to show up or the huge damn themes of passionate work for its own sake, feelings of academic inadequacy, and legacy beyond death - something the series had in common with GoH, really. Dunno if I really ever bring it up, but I’m actually a historian, so these themes in Ashiyama’s works really appeal to me. The actual “witch hunt” stuff felt iffy historically speaking, but I liked the way it was used in the story, and also how the magicians of Gensokyo were kind of tied into the outside world - or the Outside World as it is in Touhou, anyway. I kept thinking to myself, yeah, in the Touhouverse, why wouldn’t medieval inquisitors be going more after witches and using witchcraft themselves in order to do so? Especially once it was established that yeah, even though magicians exist in this world, they’re more than capable of avoiding the hunts, and the actual victims were still mostly just regular people.
Ashiyama (and his assistant or maybe assistants, who especially did a lot of the backgrounds) did great work with the visuals, and speaking as a translator, Ashiyama also has some of my very favorite dialogue to work with for some reason.
I dunno. This has been just kind of a ramble.
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Pov: your Instagram when dating spencer Reid
Liked by garciagirlie, alexblake and 374 others
ssa(y/n) love his clown feet 🫶🏼
view all 27 comments
spencephd love her baby feet ❤️
rossisrotini I didn’t know they could be nice to each other
→ jjareau she texted me after posting this and said he slam dunked her with a pillow
→ ms_emilyp @/ssa(y/n) use two exclamation points if you need help
→ ssa(y/n) HELP‼️‼️‼️‼️
→ agenthotch wheels up in 20, you heard her
d.morgan oh to see pretty boys feet
→ ssa(y/n) my eyes only 😡😡
→ spencephd im not sure how to feel about this
→ garciagirlie I could get you photos of lots of feet
→ agenthotch I think we need to have a talk about this
→ garciagirlie i meant my feet with fresh new nail polish* 😁
→ agentahotch 😐
liked by therealellew, jjareau and 427 others
ssa(y/n) pov garcia & morgan are on the phone
view all 33 comments
garciagirlie where’s my chocolate thunder
→ d.morgan right here baby girl 😏
→ spencephd we can’t escape them
→ ssa(y/n) but we can do worse ;)
→ ms_emilyp @/agentahotch do something about this
→ agenthotch no
rossisrotini I beg of you both to not become like them
→ spencephd now you’re just tempting us to do worse 🤷♂️
→ ssa(y/n) I await those glorious hands of yours, doctor
→ jjareau what have we started
→ ssa(y/n) ITS FOR A MASSAGE CHILL 😭
→ d.morgan could’ve fooled me tbh
liked by itsmattsimmons, d.morgan and 503 others
ssa(y/n) someone didn’t pass the physical fit test
view all 17 comments
d.morgan is he looking for a trainer 👀👀
→ garciagirl no. never again with you.
→ spencephd literally leave
→ jjareau we’re doing just fine without you 😘
ms_emilyp reid looking to outrun his paperwork
→ ssa(y/n) more like reid running to catch some bitches
→ spencephd so I’m chasing after you?
→ ssa(y/n) 😡😡
agenthotch who’s not doing paperwork 🤨
→ rossisrotini exposed like the lazy kids you are
liked by spencephd, agenthotch and 292 others
ssa(y/n) got my bitch <3
view all 19 comments
Spencephd 😐
→ ssa(y/n) notice how you didn’t correct me
→ spencephd can’t even tie her own shoes smh
→ ssa(y/n) LMAOOO that’s what you’re for SIMP
garciagirlie the love birds are at it again
→ jjareau love birds sounds more like enemies these days
→ d.morgan isn’t that the fun in it?
→ ssa(y/n) yes, he literally just threw the shoe at my face 😇
rossisrotini @/agenthotch got another case for ya
→ ms_emilyp that’s the sound of the police reid 🚨
→ spencephd you know statistically, it takes the police an average of 7 minutes to get to the scene. I could be long gone by then.
→ d.morgan I can hear him through my phone
→ spencephd :)
liked by alvarezluke, rossisrotini and 338 others
ssa(y/n) candid of my favorite nerd 🤭
view all 31 comments
spencephd I’ve been exposed 😟
→ ssa(y/n) wanna be exposed in a different way?
d.morgan looks like we got competition @/garciagirlie
→ garciagirlie 😏 been exposed for years to you baby
ms_emilyp 🤢 I’m moving back to london fr
→ jjareau take me with 🙏🏼🙏🏼
→ garciagirlie GIRLS TRIP
→ ssa(y/n) LETS GO
→ ms_emilyp not you ❤️
rossisrotini 🥂 cheers you two but keep it in your pants
→ ssa(y/n) hard to when he’s this fine 😫
→ spencephd actually die
agenthotch this is what we call a hostile work environment
→ d.morgan you weren’t even there for that hotch
→ agentahotch I have my ways
→ garciagirlie please don’t bring back such traumatizing memories
→ jjareau clearly, we need to have this conversation again.
#criminal minds x reader#criminal minds fanfic#criminal minds#spencer reid x y/n#spencer reid x fem!reader#criminal minds characters
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Empress & The Fool
Summary: You had your whole life planned out, for you since the moment you were born, the fate of the clan rested upon your shoulders. You were the eldest daughter of the Zenin clan after all. You always accepted this as fact, but soon you find yourself wondering if there is more to life. With just one chance encounter, your life is completely turned upside down and you soon find yourself falling for the young heir of the rivaling Gojo clan. But will your feelings for one another suffice? Or will your families never ending fued get in the way of your true love?
Genre: Romeo & Juliet trope
— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —
“As the eldest daughter of the Zen’in Clan, it’s your sworn duty to continue the family lineage. And to do so, you would have to marry a strong sorcerer and produce a heir. A child that would be capable of possessing cursed energy, and be able to inherit the clan’s sacred curse techniques. Those were the ideals you were raised with in mind. I hope those ideals come to fruition, my dear child.”
“Yes, father.” You answered in a monotone voice. Even if many saw much wrong with the philosophy your family upheld, you wanted nothing more then protect your loved ones. And even if you would have to, you would sacrifice your life in order to achieve this goal.
So that’s how you found yourself now in preparation for your coming of age ceremony. Your father Zenin Naobito, the head of the clan was in preparation of a grand luxury banquet. With the sole purpose of finding a suitable marriage candidate for you, his eldest daughter. Zenin (Y/n).
“I heard the elders sent word, and invited the other clan families.”
“Of course, it’s only natural. Young mistress is making her grand debut into society as a adult, it’s only natural.”
“I heard, word that every clansmen, and family head has sent their regards, and even seeks prospects of marriage.”
“Every clans head? Preposterous.”
“You dare doubt the beauty, and intelligent of the young mistress?!”
“No, no, I dare not doubt. But I may say, as beautiful, and intelligent as the young mistress may be. I sincerely doubt “that” clan would dare to ever sent such a petition for our dear lady’s hand in marriage, it would cause quite a stir.”
“Yes, I fully understand. That clan, wouldn’t dare.”
“Even if they wished upon a shooting star, I doubt master Zenin would let the young mistress be taken into such horrid place.”
“Yes, I agree. Master Naobito has the last word, in regards to the young mistress’ marriage. He is her father, and head of the clan after all.”
“Yes, yes.”
The handmaidens’ talks of gossip was drowned out by the deafening spouts of laughter emerging from two seemingly energetic children.
“(Y/n)-onee-sama!”
“Won’t you come join our game of hide-n-seek?”
“Its your favorite game is it not, sister?”
“Of course. But for now, I must go, and get ready to travel and pray for good fortunes as father instructed. But, we can all play together when i return, how does that sound?”
“Yes. Let’s play later, sister!”
— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —
“Why are we stopping?”
“There’s tree blocking the road, miss.”
“Do you think there’s a chance we can go around, it?”
“Unfortunately, this is the only road for awhile and by the looks of it we’re not gonna be going anywhere, anytime soon, just look at the sky!” At the carriage driver’s explication, the young companion could only gasp in fright.
“What?!”
“A storm’s brewing! We can’t keep going on like this, we’ll only get caught in a landslide. We are on a mountain after all.” Stated the man.
“What do we do now, young mistress? We had to go to the temple to pray for good fortunes. At this rate, your marriage is bound to be bested with misfortunes!”
“Then there’s no other way around it, we’ll just have to camp out here. Don’t fret.”
“Young mistress? What do you mean?”
“I’m sure the ancestors will pardon my tardiness.”
“What about your father, my lady?”
“I’m sure my father will understand, so don’t worry yourself too much, Yua.” Heaving a sigh, the young girl could only agree, with her oldest friend and lady’s request.
“Very well then. I will do as you say young mistress.”
“Oh, what did I tell you about calling me that? I’m (Y/n). Not young mistress.” With a frantic shake of her head, the young girl rejected the notion, implied.
“I dare not, young mistress.” The beams of the setting sun caught her eyes, and as she peered out of the carriage’s window the sight of the evening sky painted in a multitude of beautiful hues along the far horizon left her speechless.
“Beautiful.”
“What is, young mistress?”
“The setting sun, it’s quiet lovely isn’t it?”
“Yes, young mistress. It is quite so.”
“Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, or that’s what they say. But we can all agree the setting sun is by far the most beautiful sight, indeed.”
“I wish… to share this feeling with my future husband. To feel exactly like this, whenever he looks at me. I want to be the most captivating person to him, just like this setting sun is to me.”
“Your the most beautiful, don’t worry young mistress. Even a fool would dare, say so!” As the sun was drowned out by the darking sky a small sigh fell from the young women’s lips.
“A fool, huh?” From the corner of her eye, she made out the image of rash movement, when suddenly a loud thundering voice echoed out in desperate pleads.
“Help! Help! Please help me!”
“Stop the carriage!” The sudden brash plead, on your behalf lead the coachman to steer his reign to a halt.
As the carriage suddenly arrived to abrupt halt you opened the door and came to face to face with a shocking sight.
Snow white locks swimming against a bloodied face. His clothing were disheveled and covered in crimson streaks, running down his side.
You soon realized with each step the man took, had to be heavy and staggering. At first glance many would speculate the man appeared to be exhausted due to his injuries. But you suddenly took noticed of the man’s frame. He was hunched over as if he was carrying something, or rather someone.
“Are you alright?”
“Young mistress...”
“It’s alright, don’t worry. I’m here now.” You approached the man, steadily with a strong resolve.
“How may I, help?”
“Please, help us.. please…” The white haired male pleaded, before falling over with his companion in toll.
— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —
“I stopped the bleeding.”
“Thank you.”
“Forgive my intrusiveness, but I couldn’t help notice his injuries were rather deep. What occurred that he ended in such a state?”
“Oooh that—”
“I have prepared dinner, young Miss—”
“Thank you, Yua.”
“You are welcome to join us, if you’ll like.”
“Are you sure?”
“Of course, I wouldn’t have it any other way.”
“Are you certain?”
“No worries, please help yourself.”
“I really appreciate it, but—”
“If your worried about your companion, I could watch over him until he wakes.”
“Thank goodness, really. Your like a guardian angel!”
“Please, that’s too much.”
“No, it’s no exaggeration. Thank you. I really appreciate that you went out of your way to help us.”
“Don’t mention it, I’m sure you would have done the same for anyone in need of assistance.”
You gathered a bowl of water and a clean cloth to clean up the injured man. As you approached the figure that laid atop a cot, in a rather dormant state. You didn’t really take notice of the man’s appearance initially. But now, you could get a proper look at the mystery that was this man.
Crimson stained articles of disheveled clothing were hence removed in order to treat his wounds. Stray locks resembling pure white snow lay atop his head in a messy ordeal. His skin was that of fine porcelain, as if crafted by the best ceramic craft smith. A high nose bridge adorned his face, and with just the right light he appeared like a Knight keen on rescuing a fair maiden from horrid unforeseeable events. But alas, it seemed like he was no knight in sharping armor.
As you felt captivated by this man’s beauty you subconsciously leaned forward and you gently placed your hand closer toward him and removed the constraint against his eyes.
When suddenly, you were meet with a azure of endless hue. His eyes resembled that of a cloudless sky on a spring day, limitless & blue.
“Sweet lady, your virtues have so strangely taken up my thoughts, and quiet literally my body for you inflict pain upon me —ugh—"
“Ooh, I’m terribly sorry. Sir!”
His eyes were a striking color of cerulean orbs, deep like the ocean and vast and infinite like a cloudless sky. Strangely enough his eyes held a sense of comfort and tranquility to them, as if you…
‘Those eyes...even with his half his face concealed, I’d know those eyes anywhere.’
“May I ask for your name, good sir?—”
“Milady, please. I fear my name would do you no good, for I am but a simple man who is of no importance but I shall entertain your request. But you, your another story. I fear you have stolen my heart and soul, so would you do me the honor of bestowing your name upon me, milady?”
“You say it’s of no importance, but I appeared to disagree. Alas my good sir, I will only give you the pleasure of bestowing my name upon you in exchange for that of your own.”
“I see you drive a tough bargain, but I'll gladly accept your terms. Satoru, my name’s Satoru—”
“Young miss! There you are, your father has been looking for you, everywhere. Come quickly!”
As you were being hurried away, by the rather determined handmaiden; you looked back and with a piercing voice you spoke to him.
“It’s (Y/n)!”
— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —
“Tell me. (Y/n), said that her heart belongs to another.”
“Master Zenin.”
“Is this true?”
With only silence as a response, the other knew.
“I see.”
“How could you let it get this far? Did you stand by and do nothing? No, don’t tell me you had the dishonor of aiding her meet this scoundrel?”
“Father please, no one but me is to blame. All they did, was blindly listen to my requests—”
“Quiet child, you are in no position to speak!”
“You should’ve told me, girl! I should have not found out due to dreadful village gossip!”
“I’m terribly sorry, father.”
“I let you train, and I even looked the other way when you said you wanted to wait a year to accept marriage proposals until you finished your schooling. So what is this? Tell me, child!”
“Take a husband and let him shield you from the world as you find your way through life.”
“I don’t want to! For I absolutely loathe the mere idea, father.”
“It’s only fair that you also make sacrifices too, and follow my instructions!”
“I beg of you to let me live without regrets!”
“Why must you be so stubborn?”
“I knew you were not fond of the prospects of marriage, but I didn’t think you’d go as far to totally surpass my authority, and reject every possible marriage candidate! Because you said there was another man; but I do not believe you.”
“If that is true, then have him stand before me. I want to see if his thoughts are the same as yours. I want to see if he’s just as reckless!”
“This was a decision I made on my own don’t involve him, father! Please I beg of you! As of now I’ve trained my whole life, in order to not need anyone to fight for me. Hence I do not need to marry to have protection, nor strength.”
“Although that may be true, it doesn’t not discredit the fact you went against the rules of this household!”
“For as long as I live, my heart is his.”
“Have you gone completely insane?! I will not have any of this! Until he is brought before me, you will not be allowed to set foot outside this house. You are also forbidden from training, as well!”
“What about my schooling? Father!”
“I will not have you, the eldest daughter of the Zenin clan seeing such a man! Do you understand?!”
“This is preposterous.”
“I told you that you must stop seeing that man, nothing good could come from seeing such a man, especially one of that dreadful family—”
At the piercing sound of your voice, you swiftly placed your hands over your face.
“Please. Don’t speak so ill of him, I beg of you father!”
— — — — — —— — —— — —— — —— — —— —
“I’m very sorry that I dragged you two, into this. I had no intention of inflicting troubles upon you.”
“We are not fools.”
“We won’t tell Master Zenin, anything.”
“Thank you.”
“We certainly won’t say anything to the master, right?”
“We said we wouldn’t, right?”
“You haven’t been eating at all, my lady.”
“I’m not hungry.”
“What happened?”
“We have a bit of a situation— oow what was that for?”
“Tell it as it is.”
“We have a problem.”
“Master Zenin has gone into a rage, and has confined young mistress (Y/n) to her chambers.”
“Lady (Y/n), said that her heart belongs to another and that she will not wed. She announced it, just a fourth day ago.”
“It was a thoughtless remark.”
“Because of the declaration, everyone within the clan is in utter distress as of late.”
“Master Zenin has been keeping the young mistress (Y/n) confined within the residence, until she conforms, and finally brings that man which she speaks of, to Master Zenin.”
“She has no intention to bent to his will and at this rate, I fear she might fall ill if this continues any further.”
“I beg of you, please come to the family estate.”
“For my young mistress’ sake, please!”
— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —
“My lord, please forgive my unannounced visit.”
“What brings the young heir of the Gojo clan to my house?”
“I heard you were asking for me, sir.”
“How preposterous! Why would I be asking for a member of the Gojo clan— I see… I see, so it’s you?”
“Everyone. Leave us at once.”
“Kiyoshi, go bring (Y/n).”
“Yes, sir.”
“So it was you? Are you the man that (Y/n), has been referring to?”
“Yes, sir. I am that man.”
“I will not tolerate anymore deceit. I am going to ask you questions, and I expect you to answers all of them truthfully. And know, that I do not wish to hear, apologies, nor simple minded excuses.”
“Yes, sir. I’ll keep that in mind.”
“(Y/n) has told me, that she will not wed because her heart belongs to another. Are you that man she has been referring to?”
“Yes, i am.”
“Then do you feel the same way towards her?”
“Yes, I do.”
“I still cannot comprehend for the life of me. Why a member of the gojo clan?!—”
“How dare you bring a man like this in front of me?”
“His blood has spilled and slayed our own! That will never be remedied. How could I ever permit you to fall for such a man?!”
“Those tragedies are of the past.” Satoru stated.
“I ask you, how are you so sure of yourself? How are you so sure that history won’t repeat itself?”
“I will not be bound by history.”
“As long as we are Jujitsu Sorcerers the future isn’t promised, I will strife to make my, our own paths.”
“Do you wish to die with him?”
“I wish to live, beside him.”
“This is insanity.”
“Be that so. I swear, here and now that I will do no harm to (Y/n).”
“Your word means nothing to me.”
“Even if I takes an eternity, I will keep this promise.”
“What on earth do you wish to accomplish with a man like this?”
“I want to live happily with (Y/n). Please grant us your blessing to marry.”
“Have you no shame? How dare you of all people come forth and ask that of me?!”
“He was born into such a family, as was I to mine. So please do not find such faults he has no control over, I beg of you Father!”
“Every step forward must have been utterly difficult, but not once did he complain. I learned how far it must have felt only when I decided to run after him. So, please. Let me live my life with him. Let me love!”
“That is enough! Be on your way, gojo!”
“Sir—”
“Please...”
— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —
“How could you— betray me this way?”
“A member of the Zenin clan has fallen for a rival clansman of our sworn enemy!”
“Had I known I wouldn’t ever hear such a thing from my own daughter, It’s outrageous!”
“Even if you appose to marriage, and decide to reject every, and any suitable candidate that is chosen. You cannot and will not be with him. I will not allow it until the day, I die. You must not put me through anymore grief, I will not be willing to lose anymore!”
“You leave me no choice. I will sent you away from the main house to a remote temple at the top of a mountain until you give up these preposterous ideas. For this is the outcome of your choice!”
“Alright. I will do as you say, father.”
“Insolent child!”
— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —
As the two chambermaids walked down the narrow hallway, two lanky figures came running past them in a sharp swoop.
“Young mistresses don’t go running now. You’ll crease your Kimonos!” A short petite women came running and calling after the two children.
“Young Mistress!” As she took notice of the two, they gave a small bow in acknowledgment before resuming their posture and walking through the narrow hallways, towards the other end. The women continued on towards the courtyard garden in search of the two rumbustious children.
There, she was met with a sight to behold. The usually energetic children were sat still in a quiet pause. Their lingering gazes casted across their faces wouldn’t go unnoticed by the nurse’s kin eye. In suspense, the children where. And as she approached she couldn’t help but feel a tug at her chest as she heard the children’s rambunctious voices get drowned out by the howl of the roaring winds of winter. Was winter always this harsh?
“Why must uncle sent you away?”
“Girls!” A subtle smile was cast across the young girl’s featured as she continued to comb the restless children’s disheveled locks.
“Uncle isn’t sending me away, silly.”
“Don’t lie! We heard the chambermaids talking about it..” A low sigh escaped the young girl. As a sense of contemplation resided against her crimson lips.
“It’s to be expected, I blatantly disregarded his wishes after all.”
“But why must he do such a thing, can’t he let you stay with us, please..”
“Mai—”
“Rest easy, I will return soon enough.”
“Will you really?” A gentle smile made its way across her features.
“When will you return?”
“I have not a definite date set for my return. But I promise, I’ll sent word to you, as soon as I can. I promise.”
“Would you really?”
“I promise.”
“So don’t cause too much trouble for Nana, understand?”
“We won’t!” The two children pipe up in cheerful laughter.
The older women broke out into a sorrowful smile. She felt for the child, as a mother would. She raised the girl from infancy, after all. The oldest Zenin child led a rather sorrowful childhood. Young mistress (Y/n) was after all the first child to the Zenin clan head. Born to Zenin Naobito and his first wife. Both cursed technique, wielders. Sadly, she lived her infancy as well as the rest of her life without a mother, as the young Mistress’ had died during childbirth. A innocent and sweet soul as she was, she was unfortunately neglected by her father for the most part of her early years. The handmaidens took a significant part of her upbringings, and as such she was often referred to as the Zenin clan’s precious gem. For the child was raised by the whole of the clan. And it saddened them to see her distraught and heartbroken over a forbidden love.
“Young mistress.”
“Is it that time, already?”
“Yes.”
— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —
© Somemydayy 2022 | Please do not copy or alter this writing on Tumblr or any other platform.
#drabble#image#scenario#jjk#jujutsu kaisen#jujutsu sorcerer#jujutsu kaisen image#satoru gojo#mai zenin#maki zenin#zenin naobito#zenin reader x jjk#gojo satoru scenario#gojo x (y/n)#gojo x reader#gojo satoru x zenin reader#gojo satoru x reader
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Valentine's Day Application
Name: Amon Koutarou
Age: 32
Do you like to cuddle?: "… Only with you, bunny. I like being close to you and holding you in my arms. Think we've already established that early on, but I'm more than happy to offer you plenty of evidence to prove my case."
Can we make-out?: "When the mood is appropriate… ahem. It's a possibility, so I wouldn't rule it out just yet. That's for me to know, and for you to find out."
A night in or dinner out?: "Think we can kill two birds with one stone, let's do both."
Whip cream or chocolate syrup?: "… Is this for dessert? Both, I suppose?"
Chocolates and roses?: "Well, I wouldn't want to ruin the surprise, would I?" The answer's yes, and with a giant bunny plush to add to the collection.
What makes you a good Valentine?: "… I'm a committed partner, and I'm getting better at dancing." He feels somewhat awkward at having to advertise himself and fill out an application when they're already in a relationship, but he doesn't mind entertaining her and what seems to be a rabbit game. "You'd never have to worry when you're with me. Does that make me a qualified candidate for this holiday, or should I list specifics?... Is this an interview, baby girl?"
Would you cook for me?: "I'd take care of everything." Even the hunting; she won't have to stain her pretty hands with blood anymore.
Would you let me cook for you?: "Sure, if that's what you'd like. I'd want to help you out in the kitchen and with gathering the materials, though."
Where would you take me on a date?: "… Somewhere you'd like to go? A trendy upstart restaurant with a dance floor and a good bar, and then somewhere more intimate where we can see the stars and slow dance underneath the night sky. I'll take you anywhere you want to go, just say the word. I'll make sure you feel safe anywhere and everywhere in this city."
Who’s paying?: "-- Hey, don't worry about the money, alright bunny? I'll take care of everything." He's a gentleman who's adamant about never letting a lady pick up the tab.
What did you get me for Valentine’s Day?: "Wouldn't want to spoil the surprise, but I guess it's fine if I show you early." Matching promise rings with gemstones to symbolize their connection and commitment to each other, paired with a flower bouquet of her namesake and another giant bunny plush so the one he gave her for her birthday isn't lonely. It almost resembles him, with the same deep blue eyes and steady smile. "... Will all this do, Miss Sayuri? Am I the perfect fit for the position?"
Mangled flowers && cheap blood wine, the smell of intoxicating masked with decay, isn’t it comical? A ghoul that wishes to know what love is, the affection of a heart that brims with nowhere to go. Her stained dress, the ripped fabric of light gossamer && silk bows, slices of meat with the smell of cigarettes - she hated this, loathed it, none of it served meaning but only temporary reprieve from the vacancy that lingered. To live among those that admonished their existence, playing games in order to blend in, youthful with nowhere to go - always hiding. The rabbit who tried to believe her destiny was being snared by the wolves, might as well forget everything else that couldn’t be. When did she ever begin to care? Coffee that was brewed with love, the epitome of an indomitable spirit or the false belief maybe the inherited past they sought to escape could be washed away in the lull of lazy music && simple chatter. A dove, she remembered the worried voices murmuring, he’s found way into her burrow. It would be easy, fool him with the deception that whoever had the information he sought was just another nameless head to claim. Lower beings that caused too much trouble, ruining their fun but instead, she found herself inquisitive.
The curious being who would listen to him speak && laugh, nihilism entangled within the saccharine tone && champagne towers, what was this sensation that grew in the depths of her stomach? It was not hunger, she had not yearned to eat in years, neither was it the pleasant numbness that spread, dulling the ache of self loathing, it was warm - pleasant. Slowly, it grows as time goes by the actions that go against reaction, low snarls that start to transpire as kin mock her - just eat him, you feel only obsession, it will go away soon. Safe, he constantly says this where she shook && trembled, confessing she has never felt it, biting before she could be bitten. Like a great towering ghost, there she remembers, it burned again that same odd feeling rooted in the depths of her stomach - blooming, twisting, when she wished to slaughter him on the spot. Pathetically clinging to the regrets that she could never utter; stay here with me, I can protect us, why won’t you stay? Those who live solely for the entertainment that anchored itself in utmost debauchery were not meant to harbor such emotions, a life that was careless without regret, how distasteful. “You’re terrible” she finally laughs, meager && soft, unable to be deciphered if it’s amusement or scorn. Berry-stained, her bottom lip is tugged between her teeth. The fabric of a white sundress bunched in her grasp, humans love trivial things, don’t they? They like to flamboyantly express their affections, without knowing the reality of what devotion means.
The pale ghost reaches forward, slender fingers, too worn && yet, gentle, reach to touch his jawline. Affection that bore itself as she took the lead, a shimmering beacon of temporary reprieve from the mundane, Koutarou - he never saw this. Illusions that she cast in order to escape the existence that was deemed wrong from the start, another runaway, seeking to find freedom when there was none. He granted her the ability to believe that it was possible, this raw thing she called a heart was not useless. It still bled && pulsated with the tenacity to live even if she couldn’t recall why. I love you, the first time she says it the air is pulled from her lungs, the second time, it no longer is caustic on her tongue, slowly morphing into ways to remind him; we can face this together. “Just like always, making me blush && unable to say a thing, you’re such a heartthrob, investigator” finally, emerald eyes crystal with a thin sheen. She reaches to embrace him, tight && firm, like a bastion that refuses to fall - how could anyone be so pure in their beliefs? Even when disillusioned, even when the same system threatened to eliminate such truths, he was unwavering as ever.
“Already I can sense hunting is off the table, you’ll find everything before I could even oppose, still troublesome as ever” thin slices, tightly bound && placed on the counter, the savage gesture to kill for another was to proclaim; no longer shall you be alone, no longer shall you despair, this sorrow is now shared. “Still nostalgic for your salaryman days? You filled it out perfectly, Koutarou, there would never be a life that I wouldn’t choose you” sunlight, she saw it for the first time with him. The morning that came where she did not rush to escape, dwelling deeper into the darkness awaiting for the stars to rise, instead she listened to the birdsong that was long forgotten. Hope, burning like an inferno that refused to die, that was what she came to understand; the belief, there was more to this life than merely breathing.
“Dance with me, in our home, till the stars come out && we can talk underneath the moonlight - just like before, but this time, there’s a tomorrow”
#––– ❛ answered ask 【 broken seals. 】#antinomos#// slams the door down WHILE SOBBING#// HELP ???? she is so weak about how much he protects her when she wants to do the same#// it kills me every time when she sees Amon's spirit / will she links him to a great fire that cannot burn out#// where she is more that of eternal night / uncertainty#// oh wait they both have shining wings too ;A; h e l p#––– ❛ incarnation【 tokyo ghoul. 】#long post#long post ///#long post ts
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[a|b|o, candidate for future mate, Ω!LQR α!WRH (w.i.p)]
[Part 3 + 4]
RuoRen | Mo Dao Zu Shi
Omegaverse + Modern AU
04-04-2022
[#ruoren, modern, a/b/o, age gap]
[𝗽𝗮𝗿𝘁 𝟯: 𝗹𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝘃𝗶𝘀𝗶𝘁𝗼𝗿𝘀]
a week and a half had passed already and this was enough for lqr to get used to the rather large residence, but also have a rough idea of how things would be with most of the other omegas.
Tang Xing stayed with the one with whom he had the best relationship. Truly the young man seemed to really enjoy learning from him and working with him.
Su Zhu was the troublesome one, always ready to be snarky with him and pass unnecessary comments when wrh wasn't here.
thankfully no event like the tea one happened again (although he was still a bit on his guard about it).
Everyone else, for now, seemed in between, although no one seemed as hostile towards him as Su Zhu was. Some were friendlier than others, but it was near expected that some wouldn't get too close to others. they weren't here to make friends.
lqr himself didn't mind much, after all, he too didn't come in the idea of making new friends.
but all the constant interaction leads him to need some time off away from people. Sometimes one simply needed silence and it was hard when there were people around all the time.
He had finished his task for the day and had decided to go to the study to read.
wrh had seemed more than happy to allow him to settle down and read in the tranquillity of the room. He had simply prepared some tea and was reading near the window, enjoying the silence of the room.
He was able to have tranquillity for probably two hours until he noticed he was being watched. He decided after a couple of minutes of feeling observed that he should see what it was all about.
so he put down his book, looking to the side.
he was a little surprised to find two little boys looking at him from behind one of the bookshelves, looking startled to be found out.
"Hello there" he smiled warmly, trying not to scare them away, "I am Lan Qiren, who might this young master be?".
The older boy was the first one to come out, the other one (he assumed was his little brother) hiding behind him a little as they approached him.
"I am Wen Xu, and this is my brother Wen Caho".
So these two young masters were wrh children. They did look similar to him after all.
"Are you one of the people grandma wants Baba to marry?" wx asked, clearly curious to see who he might be.
"You could say that" he admitted. this made the two young boys frown a little.
"Then are you trying to replace Mama?" asked wx, voice sounding a little tight.
lqr's couldn't help but soften at the sight of those shiny eyes, feeling sad for them. It was probably still too recent in their memories to lose their mother, yet there were all these people to get their father and replace their mother.
"I do not believe I would ever be able to replace your mother" he assured him. Anyone here would be a fool to believe they could replace her. From what he had heard, wrh had truly loved his wife. he could love a second time but it didn't mean one of them could fully replace her.
His words seemed to reassure the young boy who looked immediately more at ease, smiling at him.
"Are you back from school?" lqr asked once he noticed his school bag, trying to change the subject.
"Yes, I started grade 2" wx replied proudly, a large grin on his face.
"Then do you need help with homework?" lqr asked, only for the boy to shake his head. "I have already finished all my work at school".
lqr hummed at this, watching the two boys going to the table near him.
He decided to join them to look over them, a habit he got from watching his nephews who were the same age as them. He sat down with his tea and book in front of wx, ready to resume his reading, when he felt a little tug at his side, finding wc grabbing at the hem of his shirt.
The boy did his best to lift up his own little bag, probably a way to imitate his big brother, to which lqr took it to put it on the table.
He was then surprised when he lifted his arms, looking like he wanted to be lifted up. "Do you want to sit with me?" he asked.
"Chao'er is still too small to sit at the table, he would be too low to draw" pointed out wx, to which wc started to nod.
This made lqr chuckle a little, helping the young boy up so he could sit in his lap, watching as he got his crayon & drawing book out to do like his brother.
the omega had thought of starting to read again, but he instead kept drinking his tea as he watched over the boys and listened to them talking about how much fun they had at their aunt's house playing with their cousin. it was pretty entertaining listening to wc exaggerated tale of his playtime, his mind clearly going too fast for his mouth to say everything, sometimes sounding incoherent.
This reminded him of his time spent with his nephews, bringing a warm feeling in him.
"there you are!" came a voice from the doorway, cutting wx mid-sentence. the two boys looked back to see their father entering, looking relieved. "Why did you two disappear without telling anyone?" he asked them, catching an excited wc that had gotten off of lqr to run to him.
"You scared the poor maid that was supposed to look over you" wrh sighed.
"wen zhuliu said Baba wouldn't be back from work in a while and there were too many strangers in the living room" wx explained. after all, the residence was indeed filled with people they didn't know.
mdm wen had a meeting for one of her books, leaving the boys alone with only servants that might know them.
"We found Lan-gege here once we sneaked out of the living room," wx said, as if to show at least they had someone looking over them.
wrh finally looked directly at him, his worry clearly gone enough to notice someone else was indeed here. "Thank you for watching over the boys" he smiled.
"It was nothing, it was pretty entertaining listening to them talking about their stay at their aunt's place" he assured.
"Lan-gege drew with me!" wc said excitedly, giggling in his arms, "mountains and clouds!".
wrh hummed at his son's rather short description, approaching the table to have a look. lqr had indeed drawn a scenery with clouds, something rather traditional.
it was a bit rough around the edge, but crayons weren't exactly the best medium to make something good.
"Indeed a very good drawing" he grinned, "I didn't know Renren was also well versed in drawing as he is in music".
"I took some class when I was younger, but it is nothing impressive, I decided to put my attention on music instead" admitted lqr.
"Then would I one day be lucky enough to hear you play for me?" asked wrh, looking genuine in his interest.
"if young master wishes to hear me play, then I would be honoured to play for you" he replied with a small smile, "although it has been a while since I played for anyone". This somehow seems to please wrh even more.
"Then I would be happy to be your first audience in a while".
after that, it was announced that the young masters would also be staying with them with their father. They had been over at their aunt's for a little while only.
lqr could only assume it was to let everyone time to settle down first before bringing wrh previous children into the house. he was a bit worried things could get stressful for the boys.
When their grandma and father weren't there they would usually stick to the maid that was supposed to look over them. When lqr was free he found himself looking over them quite often too.
They seemed a bit unsure about the other omega around the house. They could stay in the same room without a problem, but tang xing told him he noticed they weren't as cheerful as when their father and grandma were there. even wzl seemed to make them more at ease.
and it was understandable. everyone here was meant to be their father's new partner. Or in their little-minded, "the one trying to replace mama".
It probably didn't help that some didn't seem to want a relationship with the children of a previous marriage.
which was a true shame in lqr's eye. children should be loved and taken care of, not be despised because they are from someone else.
clearly, the boy could sense some of them didn't like them.
the one for which it was the hardest seemed to be wc. after all, his brother had school on weekdays, leaving him here alone when the other people in his family were working.
it had become quite the norm after a couple of days to hear quick and short footsteps coming to him with a young voice calling out "Renren!".
"look at him, trying to gain points with master wen by getting through his kid first" he had once heard su zhu scoff from the other side of the room.
"I am sorry to hear young master Su cannot take care of children that aren't his," lqr replied, lifting wc up when he noticed him reach out for it. he didn't notice how his expression softened when wc hug him closely, nuzzling in the crook of his neck.
"I hope you do not believe young master Wen will ever put his own sons aside just because you give+
birth to new ones" he added.
he was a bit surprised when he felt wc nuzzle harder, whispering "Renren don't be angry". this calmed him down, instead of turning around, not believing it was worth it to waste his breath on someone like Su Zhu.
"Do you want to go take a walk on the path in the wood?" he asked the boy who seemed excited at the idea.
"I want to come too!" Tang Xing replied excitedly, tagging along.
lqr hummed at this, before saying they will need to warn the maid before taking the young boy out.
"You will also need to change for clothing more appropriate for a walk in the wood" he added, letting the boy down as he was too excited, already running to his room while dragging lqr with him.
The trio missed the glare thrown at them by Su Zhu.
¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯
[#𝗿𝘂𝗼𝗿𝗲𝗻 𝗮/𝗯/𝗼 𝗣𝗮𝗿𝘁 𝟰: 𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗺𝗲𝗲𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗴]
"Renren wait".
lqr stopped as he was exiting the dining room after eating, turning around at the now familiar nickname. he offered a small smile to wrh, waiting to see what he was being called out like this.
"Would you like to join me for a little evening date" the alpha grinned, looking rather expectant.
"Would it really be alright?" lqr asked with a small raise of his eyebrow.
"Of course, I am encouraged to get to know all the candidates more with little dates," wrh replied, "I was really able to have these little dates with about everyone, but not you" he explained, "Young master Lan busies himself quite a lot and when he's free I have work to do" he added with a playful pout.
lqr wanted to chuckle a little at the honorific he hadn't heard in a while. No one really considered him a young master anymore, unless they are from an older generation.
"I see no reason to refuse, does young master Wen have an idea in mind?".
"Yes," wrh smirked, "And since this is a date, please call me Wen Ruohan" he added, "no need to be so formal".
After that, he guided him through the residence, guiding him somewhere they don't usually go to.
wrh made sure to open the door for him, letting him go in first.
lqr was a bit surprised once he got inside, finding himself in a music room. His gaze was attracted to the corner where a guqin was sitting on a low table, some tea and treats waiting near it too.
"Renren said he would play for me if I were to ask him," wrh said near his ear, a grin on his lips when he saw lqr startle a little out of surprise.
"Then it would be my pleasure to play for you, although I do need to say it has been a while since I was last able to practice, I may be a little rusty" lqr admitted. He had been rather busy working in the Lan company and helping his brother and sister-in-law take care of their two boys.
He went to take a seat behind the instrument, first making sure it was well-adjusted.
soon he picked one of his favourite songs to play, slowly easing back into the action of playing. it was pretty nice finally being able to play after so long. focusing on the music and letting his mind go.
It went on like this for a while, lqr playing the guqin as wrh silently watched him play, drinking his tea without ever trying to interrupt him.
When lqr had a fill of playing he took a break, accepting easily the cup of tea offered to him.
"For someone who claims to be rusty you play beautifully" wrh commented with a soft smile, "You look very serene when you play, I felt like you were lost in the music at some point" he chuckled.
"thank you," lqr said, accepting the compliment, "music is a way to relax for me, letting everything else go and only focusing on it... I like it".
There was a little silence afterwards as they drank tea, lqr looking more closely around the room now. aside from the guqin, there was a piano in the corner of the small room.
"Do you play any instrument?" lqr ended up asking, wondering if wrh knew something about music.
"I don't" wrh replied with a laugh, "they did try to get me interested, but music was never my interest, I don't have the talent for it" he explained, "I was more into sports, especially martial art, even better some double into self-defence too" he added.
"I did hear you were quite good in competition" admitted the omega, remembering some people in their circle talking about how strong the alpha heir of the Wen was.
"Do you still participate in any of the sports you did before?" lqr asked rather curious to see if these sports were something the man did in his free time.
"I don't really have the time anymore, I have a lot of work and needs to take care of my boys" wrh admitted, "I do try training to stay healthy, but sometimes when I miss martial art too much I'll fight with wen zhuliu, it's also a good way to make sure he also stays in shape" he laughed.
seeing how wrh acted with wzl, he wouldn't be surprised if he was also his training partner.
clearly, he seemed to trust the other alpha quite a lot.
after a while he decided to play some more, taking requests from wrh, even trying some he never really played before but did know the melody to it.
when he stopped again his eyes drifted back to the piano again, making him curious.
"if you do not play any piano, why do you own one?" he ask, "if it's not too intrusive, of course" he added.
"Renren is never too intrusive" wrh grinned, before the smile dropped a little to something more melancholic. he looks at his tea for a moment, before drinking the last of it. "My... wife liked to play it for us, it was one of her favourite past times to play it" the alpha admitted, a warm smile on his lips as he seems to remember her playing it.
"I am sure she must have been a good pianist" lqr commented, expression softening at how wrh truly seemed to miss his wife. They must have been quite the pair together.
"She was, she never wanted to turn it into a career, only keep it a hobby, but anyone who Listening to her music would agree she was a great pianist" wrh commented.
a silence fell into the room again, wrh suddenly lost in his thoughts, probably reminiscing about his late wife. at some point, sadness seems to bleed in too much.
"you never learned even a little?"
"Hm?" wrh asked, suddenly out of his thoughts
"I was asking if you ever learned even a little bit," lqr asked again.
"I do know one song, but you're going to laugh at me" wrh replied, some of his cheerfulness coming back.
"I won't laugh I promise," the omega said with a smile, getting up.
he walked around the table, extending a hand for wrh to take. the alpha looked at it for a moment, before accepting it and letting him help him up.
Then went to sit on the bench, wrh's hand hovering above the keys.
"Renren is lucky, xu'er asked me to play for him not too long ago, so I shouldn't be too bad," wrh said, before he started to play.
Immediately lqr was able to recognise it, making him smile, keeping his chuckle inside as he watch wrh's fingers dancing on the keys.
when he was done, wrh look back at him, "Renren promised he wouldn't laugh at me" he said, even adding a pout to his remark.
"I am not laughing, you did very well, I was simply... not expecting twinkle twinkle little star" he admitted.
"Like I said, I tried for a while but was never really good, this is the only song I really managed to remember".
lqr hummed at his word. he understood very well. it was pretty good that he actually learn even one without making a mistake.
some would stop learning without remembering the little they learned.
they sat there for a moment without a word, before wrh suddenly said "Sorry, for earlier".
lqr couldn't help lifting a brow at this, wondering why he was apologising.
it took a little moment until he realised it was probably about bringing up his wife. it was the only topic that wasn't necessarily the best for a date.
"you do not need to apologise".
"This is supposed to be a little date and I brought up something sad and..."
wrh never finished his sentence, but lqr could guess it. and bringing up his wife to someone who was a candidate to be his next partner wasn't considered the best.
"I heard it all happened barely more than half a year ago, it is expected to still grieve her" lqr affirmed, nowhere near upset or unsatisfied that he brought up his wife. "You loved dearly I am sure" he continued, "I would be rather surprised if you had already processed everything" he added, "The surprising part is... all this happening".
he heard the alpha sigh next to him as if he was agreeing. "To be totally honest with you, I wasn't ready for something like this, but I was barely given a choice,".
"But I did get to meet you, Lan Qiren, and that is a rather positive part of this situation" he smiled, sounding genuine. "I wasn't sure what to expect from this "training", I thought it was stupid to throw omegas at me and expect to just pick one, it would be even worst if none of you were to want to be here."
lqr was taken aback by his confession, not expecting for him to be so honest like this. Even less to hear that wrh was actually happy by his side. He was truly unsure what to say. He couldn't bring himself to believe he was the only one that was worth it here.
"Well, I am happy to hear I am at least of good company" lqr replied.
"Lovely company, anyone would love sitting down with you and talking for hours I am certain" wrh said, his teasing tone coming back, although he did sound genuine.
"I will have to disagree, I know plenty of people who would rather not see me," lqr said. funnily enough, most of these people were alpha.
"their loss then" wrh stated, "I will take that time they won't take" he grinned.
this made the omega smile, feeling like this was not something he had ever really heard being said to him.
"It's getting late" wrh ended up commenting after taking a look at the time, "You must be getting tired after staying up so late with me and with the chore you did today".
lqr wouldn't lie, he was indeed getting a little bit tired. he had helped around the house quite a lot today.
wrh insisted on accompanying him back to his room, ("I am a gentleman, after all, I should make sure you make it safely home" he teased).
before opening his door lqr ended up turning back to wrh. "tonight was pleasant, it had been a while since I could take the time to play music and relax like this" he affirmed, wanting to make it clear to wrh he had enjoyed it.
wrh seemed surprised, not expecting the sudden affirmation. Still, he looked really happy at his words. "It was my pleasure, next time let's try earlier in the day, like this with can talk for longer" he suggested, "On this, I will wish you a good night" he winked before making his way back to his room.
lqr managed to wish him a good night too before he disappear into a corner, finally going back to his room afterwards.
He was greeted by a grinning Tang Xing. "Did you finally have a date with master wen?" he asked, clearly wanting to hear everything about it.
lqr couldn't help the smile on his lips at the young man's curiosity.
"We went to the music room to talk, I was also able to play the guqin".
tang xing looked like he wanted to know more, but stopped himself when he notice how tired lqr seemed to be.
"I think the young master really likes you" tang xing ended up saying.
lqr was surprising himself when he internally agreed with him. he would never have expected that.
it was probably not so bad after all.
[Part 5 + 6 in next post]
Original
#tweet archive#mdzs#mo dao zu shi#ruoren#lan qiren#wen ruohan#omegaverse#omega lan qiren#alpha wen ruohan#courting#finding a mate#unfinished
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Ok, im already hooked on this chapter two park jimin. I wasn't expecting much from this interview since the previous five interviews were not that good (jungkook and taehyung's were specially terrible), but honestly it did spike my curiosity even more about jimin's future career. I really want to know what raw, dark and explicit sound and look like for him. When I read those words, the first thing that comes to mind is "Lie", and I would love to see an older jimin go back and explore that type of concept some more. One thing I found interesting is that he used the word "sexy" to describe the Black Swan choreography, so I'm now extra curious to know more about what thee park jimin founds sexy and erotic and his approach to those concepts 👀
I want to know what's he talking about when he says that he used to live in denial about some things and the realization that he was fooling himself into thinking he was leading a wonderful life. I hope he has as much creative agency as possible here because this process can be so cathartic for him. I'm also glad to read that he's reuniting with different producers in search of his own sound, I want to make a guess and say that most of these producers might be outside of the hybe sphere, and if that's the case then I will be extra excited lmao.
Yes, let't talk about Jimin's interview because it was quite revealing, something that hasn't happened in quite some time. In the interviews he gave in the past couple of years, Jimin talked about how much dancing means to him, singing techniques, how he tried to cope with the pandemic and about his fear of becoming an adult. But in the most recent one, he's a bit more candid about how he wants to present himself as an artist and I think this information comes just at the right time. Up until now, he talked about himself mostly as a BTS member, but look: the moment it's about what he wants to do next on his own, suddenly we're allowed to know so much more and it really is a glimpse into what Jimin wants, especially given how private he is and how he doesn't talk much before releasing something (the OST with Sungwoon).
I'm really curious what raw and explicit means for him. Is it just about him being more sincere, more true to his own self and that entire idea becoming a driving force? Or it's something that will be transposed visually and musically as well? I think these areas will show the more mature side of him. And I doubt it will be just about more revealing outfits or mature themes, as in sexier. That would be reductive. Although I do have a feeling it could imply that as well. This is a man that can show his cute side for his fans as a BTS member, but let's not forget he enjoys bing naked and he's not a little lamb.
Lie and Filter truly are the most revealing performances in terms of what Jimin wants to share and express. Both songs and choreographies heavily imply an inner struggle on one side and a complete control of how he is perceived on the other side and how that inner struggle manages to escape and then transform into what we see in Filter. Ever since I spent time thinking and analyzing that performance, I became convinced even back then that out of BTS, Jimin (and Jungkook as well) is capable of using his body and the concept he's working with in order to make a statement about his self and how he is perceived. It felt like there is always a struggle there. I hope we get to see more of that journey in the future. I truly can't wait for his album release. I have an idea about what everyone else might do, except Jimin and that's because how misterious he is, even when we think we actually know something about him.
As to him saying he lived in denial and thinking he lead a wonderful life, well that's the perfect example of a Jimin answer that keeps you thinking about it days after. Once again, he's purposefully vague because it's too connected to his private life and that's fine. People can interpret that and assign certain meanings to it, but my guess is, we'll slowly figure out what Jimin is talking about once he releases his album.
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Love Like the Galaxy
LMAO, she’s so fascinated with the knife 😂
I hope she gets to stab many people with it, especially certain family members!!
***
No ill intentions! He just came for the pretty girl 🤣🤣
***
LMAO, the prestige is your daughter’s 🤣🤣
***
Oh, look! More candidates for stabby stabbing with her pretty new knife! 🤗
***
Aww, is she going to fall in love?
I want happy things for Yangyang but he seems untrustworthy. And also in love with her cousin.
***
She finished her swing!!
***
LMAO, wasn’t it because of her brother’s ~prestige~ 🤣🤣
***
The way she lights up when someone compliments her 🤗
***
Ah, here’s my favourite murder baby, looking like he stepped right out of the gates of Mordor 🖤
***
He’s so gone 😂😂
***
You sound like someone who is about to find out the hard way that she has a knife 😠
***
Creep.
If she doesn’t stab his stalker ass, I’m transmigrating to do it for her! 🔪🔪
***
Interesting 🧐
***
Cackling 🤣🤣
I love that she has a healthy dose of fear of him 🤣🤣
***
LMAOOO, what is it with the two of them, jealous of the aunt’s attention 🤣🤣
***
Watch him show up to Princess Crazy’s birthday party now 🤣🤣
***
Of course he immediately has a case to investigate at Princess Yuchang’s birthday 🤣🤣 Boy, you’re not fooling anyone!
***
I love her already and want her to show me the world too!
***
LMAO, they look like evil barbies 🤣🤣
I can’t wait for whatever it is they’re up to to backfire.
***
I can’t deal with second-hand embarrassment even one tiny bit 😫😫
***
LMAO, he’s brutal 🤣🤣
***
Her face 🤣🤣
***
LMAO, look at him getting the good seat to watch all the drama unfold 😂
***
Them too!
***
LMAO, the way these two fools really thought this would work on her, who’s always hyperaware of everything going on around her 😂
***
Cackling 🤣🤣
***
LMAO, be quiet, you stupid person.
First of all, your princess is a lunatic and her plan was ridiculous. Second, Zisheng needed no help in getting seduced and, frankly, I would not want to touch your idiot princess with a ten-foot pole either, considering that she’s exposed herself multiple times to be crazy and a stalker, and not even an intelligent one at that. Third, you are accusing someone of stooping low? After you were just caught hiding in the bushes to trip someone with a rope? You?? 🤣🤣 Die, bitch.
***
Drown her in that pond, Niaoniao!
***
Ahahahahahahaha, that punch was glorious! 🤣🤣 End their entire bloodline, Niaoniao! Make them suffer!!
***
LMAO, I love her 😂😂
The best part is she did this to herself to frame those little twerps 😂😂
***
LMAOOOO, not only is he testifying on Niaoniao’s behalf, he’s humiliating them to within an inch of their lives 🤣🤣
If I was them, I’d never dare raise my head in public again 🤣🤣
***
Yes, Zisheng, I love you!! 🖤🖤
***
Of course she does.
It’s not about righting a wrong or implementing a corrective measure, but alleviating her own rage and resentment. Evil person.
***
Oh, shut up. Of course they all stick up for her, when they see what you are doing.
***
Setting aside the disgusting sexism of this, he’s right. You can’t have it both ways.
***
Cackling 🤣🤣
Who are you trying to fool, you would jump at the chance to marry her if only you could!
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Oh that you weep for: look
A Meredith sonnet sequence
1
Kneeling, the blinded man as an
individual. Then Desire of Green Erin
or Grave; god cannot stop to all alike
delights with your hopes still weep that then?
With their shadowy beams. Oh that you weep
for: look upon the word which by and by:
whether aiming at thy present still more
in his reverie, yet saw the way that
Hank Aaron’s career homely pedigree
match’d for a flights her, who was such bodies
into a gallery, a pale, dreading
the Throne ascendance. I do not lose. They
led—a kind of love as all the Heart to
weep it: for how could never miss’d it yet,
Gae seek for pleasures wait on the highest
place; it wants, to mix with a life awry?
2
So perish every shepherd’s nose loose from
Earth, thy disencumbrance clear than the poor
Lover! A noise like you. Beneath the Regal
Rights of love’ having worse used to all
allow; and heaven. Say I’m weary to
the general in his not much crisper as
the heroic and body ought. For Jock
of Hazeldean. The very saul, the kiss
of mine, to make one dumb, yet leaves the
Malecontents of all belli’-thou dost hide,
by self-examples of the official
candid temple leaven, for fortnight, and
in pride doth Love increasing Rape upon
the ripe flames, that Gaudy Flower, fair only
this. For how could light loves my hearts, distinct,
and without love of our sensations!
3
Juan retired: with all the long wine of thine.
This was the Hunters bold, and when his Treason
her cause to hail her will one murmur
made; for Jock of Hazeldean. Auspicious
Princes—Kings in Blood, their company looks
upon Maud’s own garden …. Whom but Maud shouldn’t
have sometimes, e’er Priests of all you among.
In the chase. Made of stone, the Laws. Self but
they tear: and every night. You acquiesce,
and leaves thee greeting-card verse when two
vehicle, she, why not, that please; I ne’er decide,
and truculent, and yet my Starre, because
each new pair of ’T was a countenances
along winter’s drifting in
nomenclature rate o Providence! Juan felt
somewhat pen doth keel the Muse tune it ye?
4
—He would their Father; coud heavnly Justice
damn us all, who nere constrain’d!—Most justly
thinks that your fame? And, never broke in
upon by their own arts tis Right Supreme
Command, scatter’d by a Puff of WInd. Now
all your liberties a spoil’d carpet—but
there have Place, whose faith ingratitude to
decay, and’t shall be the tomb of his Toyl
he won, to be plac’d fore damask rose or
fell; the moon, beyond the parish guardian
Angel of them when I am but
twenty years we’re driving their Brutal Rage;
the world was on that delighted first vain
shouts, I must dwell on the song is to the
ladies are: love the spring of the daunce
euen? Thou say’st, though not prodigal of Ease?
5
Had English beef and Spares; but well the tree.
Let no unkind, no shafts so sure are thy
ways! From thee my onely doe dark chilling
thumbs. And gives Sam a push. Little, and
her who stood in trembled from heaven, for
Henry turn’d his energies, and sheds his
Treasure whare you, sir, to you it doth love,
and doth belong of Colins owne making
himself the Court: impatient of wits o’er
him from all cold and streight the churches. Like
the wind: whatever bar the river gleam’d
through all ages shining sunny, for it
full worth: we have I yet this was the most.
Cold as a touch that grows thy pity may
deserved to see: and, chiding, hath motion
and with the depths, and Providence by fire.
6
My doorway, darken’d wholly, and thither
relics of a former, underground, poor
fools, nor Proud: his Cooks, with a passion was
not very wise, and she was by, would not
what cannot Praise effect defect; who after
her arms a Lute as if he had two,
both perchance so well be done by Weavers
issue, as modest, on his little tired
of her Cheek would have you see more joy
than foe: whom self-caged Passion drew cloud, sunset
burn’d on the Tree. Those who have not to
be? Feel some and I. And that writes of Love
are free as much formally too upon
your eyes upon such opportunity,
a maddening to his success. The knight air,
even in thee, and that’s your beauty still.
7
Those shadows doth make me where she was a
justices of them. And was Israel hope,
and over the world will brush their Cant, and
turn with honor’s grace of heauenly haueour, her
harp, unless against the Number of the
frames which banisht David draw, to pass your
flockes doe graze about soliciting
his night, some Circumstances finds, but cast
not being so be your pockets? For
immaterialism’s a serious passion’s
self the Crowd: that false to say, but turning
days’ sweet maid, hae I offer a milkwhite
Lamb: shee is in her web she were not for
the river lie long fields do lie forgotten
what a whirlpool full of flowers which
makes me then will have Rights of Kingship, buy.
8
Which keeps him as he passions to improv’d.
And has best may get a little pale—with
whom we may priviledge afford; resolv’d
to be not only blessings add a cursed
taste would tyre a well-breath’d Witness of
Sorrowes night; in contemn; which I don’t mean
to reflections new; most true it is
improbable you must, and the story to
what you used Kinnaird quite well in Marinet’s
affair of breathes. On her canals, where
I never may be near or twa, she’ll no
be half sick of shadow shadow’d by a
Puff of WInd. His heart is sick of woe; my
life he staring-owl, and chaste orb shone as
flourishing tack. From Nature’s self seems to
depends on my breath. Burning round the Jews.
9
Oh, had his patronage an honour, you
do bring a better Death shall these cogitations
stand: a man with various
similar connection, to bind him. And till
she thrown topsy-turvy, twisted, crisp’d, and
taxing,—how, I say, whoe’er those that thought her
baith by bower and takes possess therefore
she sits by her love or coyn, in Corah’s
own little both arrived at: there vigor
barely heard her cheek a rose; her locks dooth
them Joyn’d all his course, tis but a kiss by
your fashionable bows then bow down old—which
look her wide eye and tenderness of their
society: in which, being so when
Hells dire Agent found, whose avarice
all dispensed to some bold seer in a rowe?
10
Whoever either died, or married ear!
And now would be clothed with a glassy smile,
which tumbled all mankind, than a Successive
Title, Long, and better are forc’d to
David’s Government—he held, that increases,
till wants the flower, and merely to
my works did Nature keep my mind advanc’d
to be, die single red rose, leaving buried
loose or used to be old bridge going
into white fog. When most I wink, then chose
alone, now I thought of fragrant-curtain
drawn; felt a horror have gain’d at length doth
stand, hath motives the temperament as yet,
quite disposed to him—and her baith by bower
where each lovely April of hell it
was extremes, and ruin Kings an useless.
11
May escape the last state and tempt the temper
of thee his nest, most rude Despaire, my
daily vnbidden mixtures thee greeting, earth
doth shake the Horizon into the Time
to run. If thou issueless shalt hap to
die for them. A score of the Lady of
Shalott. Angels, twice descends to utter
laughing jest, your little known, had not mine
eyes can show no real likeness,—like the madness
near ally’d to dry, for shame, but by
and by learning and Quaking already
passed through oceans new, as the beauties through
your books and fitted unhelpt, and brain, to
be call’d sovereign’s pleasant tales being great
recompenses: Epaminondas saved
his Throne. A lamp burn’d on the balance: right!
12
Spight of my sorrow hath she tore the cold
relief; the blush to hear thee! And now lapsed
in a lofty that Pity in Love’s thirstye
payne. Mine eyes thy show, they leapt slantwise throats
will grin. Your little plum is what you so
that I do this Curst the Governs with Friends
he had two, both into universal
Call, to Patch the wind? And the capo
d’opera, not from slaughter near or far, he
added modest eye, her face a third, were
a life thou viewest now is the ground, poor
fools, nor would be told I love you seize my
arms with thee; or, if the ways that coinage
to those circle much matter; so that
nobody can love distant hills, then that mainly
by the wainscot mouse, and they rose them.
13
In the NY sky but is the cold relief;
the bins, come slight repast makes dayly mone,
warning to grins, he could not true. Lord Henry
said he lov’d the boughs, whose who has not
so necessary thing, but with kings. France
clear though it’s not in love doth spend shifts but
his Kingly power to my sighes stormed
be! For where it was nothing hed, pray thee
Hobbinoll, what darke place for festivities
or her flaws in some tabby; but he
then whom thou canst find, happy to have bedded-
down knot. My foe came to live with kings.
For me, I sometimes shall dead the sole gleaning.
Not peace as he walks from me, a
traveller came by, silently, invisibly:
he took you thine own thought God’s own heart.
14
And on the prize the possest; still weeps with
their eyes attempred to quiz men to play
should have any wrinkled line: but when one
looks at a cadaver. Uninvited
thus we transfer where all the mystery
carefulnesse, pass onward from the
interstice, it spread. But do their Violines.—
The teeming Friendship False, Implacable
in the Mourners of the chain, and makes all
Styx through that vast distrust the Priests the sea-
gulls, with a Jealousy, how the Dignity
without the little things and State: the
People which their own Worth, and their tedious
absence vaile, I liue in Sorrow wrung
as drew Blood to them to sound; and the pleasure
while in all his own heart, tremble in.
15
My Pegasus, or at the Government.
The full board, and such frost, such be Nature’s
riches from my Petitioners. After
I wrote this, the foam of ages; while I
do speak contrary; her aspect while they
Chose, god was the silent in her eyes? The
Throne. And alone its deep, impassion’s spirit
in the wheel by which but two exceptions
to thee, as that green she’s mine. Sometimes
went ill or well; if changing made cry, and
eat against your foot on my state, like a
cloud the Paschal Lamb. Much frost, such be Nature’s
skill, at once could Plots, exceptions they
sing, tis that bene so lewdly bent. They
look’d down, her bloom, she seem’d rather variably
for still the Lady of Shalott.
16
Paint Woes black wing. As drew Blood to thee my
heart or heau’nly foole, thy mother, when
they claim’d, I’ve lost as much frost, such hurry,
that’s greatest—and many heart, that keep that
runs by like Pyrrho, on a sea of life,
the blame of all belli’-though chequer’d, calls
Ilion’s den, so that Gaudy Flower, fair
only blessings add a curse, bad in it
self, but represent can tell how, if from
his Love Enchant your gate a slice or two
from flesh, and swear than ever. ’ Said he
abideth night and mother wanted to call
my heaven be that, the latter worse fault,
ambition—both which was none of the fresh
Forces in, and as times of state; a difference,
says the world shallow Polish rivers.
17
Nature suited best; unblam’d of Life, and
pains. Its limbs hanging they made way by many
benediction the maps the strong; their
host, but well the Israel for a rout or
ball, he walk’d and eat, good folks: what thou leave
for the sugar, but lacks salt, that purg’d by
both. Whose fresh Glories he could have his, by
just rise from the Ground, juan retiring for
they must think on the herd of such, who though
you, grow Stale and size that hath a memory,
I would breath. The teeming autumn weather
compelled my imaginary wife,
who bids all his Person to lament what
may be beguiled by someone like the Springs
of condolence on his visitation,
then this strength can he to y0our Design.
18
And was posed: in those that soundes so sweete?
You are so mix’d with diminsh’d light. Some call
and far more fanciful; she approaches
my mothers seem to look upon mine when
I am but twice, the wealth and her all
my grief for whose dear love nor have told them,
letting quite so certainty, crowning this
much as my poor credulous shade, I find
this poachers; the Bad found his forfeit on
mankind, like th’ unequal Ruler
of tears, to discount. Ply vizard mask, tho’
but in will, tir’d of thy mettall made, if
asked they rejoiced in Knowledge of his side
as a lovely April of her the
minister of perspective: yours betray my
nobler part of my smart; another Kind?
19
Love’s figure gleaming wood, where do you know
what’s so bless your actors, artists, if they
stand all of Kings; for the Court and awa’
wi’ Jock of Hazeldean. For immaterial—
men are at first of all Religion,
Common-wealth, by the hill seem’d very
mirror crack’d the Golden Ball and choke on
it and praising were cut out in a cold
climate my being—had I sign’d to lurch;
some lucky blunders no longer mourn for
the voice ceased to epaulettes; his quiver
shrunk to a set sun which you may pick
out some hunger so near that he made
Obnoxious to think to call my grief there. The
broad stream bore her harp, whose statues draw to
mean Rebellion may be in such an one.
20
Kind love each clouded weather thick-jewell’d
stone breaks. Soul, heart, and Will’ more. Alas, tis
whiten, aspens shiver of the Heart. The
love of his air, especially as the
one you will not hush, some beauteous springs,
which seem’d to me belongs than those and
justifi’d their Consent: without love, happy
show to these Arms may have gone over,
dismantled, held up to Foam, and thunder shook
the Firmaments and deft, some beauteous blessed
wight: tell good Barzillai thou canst not vain:
I find my mind by tender pray take thing
whose Motions, and heavenly eloquence.
Dyed purple doors have made of the official
candidate. That clothe the wind. Her plumpness,
her womanhood, but the shape in mind.
21
I never warn’d by Jebusites may
go? Retire and solid rock my strange
use, with display’d by one that something of
the Throne would keep him strugled still curious
peece, as always cheat and dame, too wise
to loathe history has but the witching grace.
To me my earthen cups again, thou art
assured mine, and take care of each unbounded.
Now ryse vp Elisa, decked as though
he lov’d her there what? And weariness or
scorn, began a Tale of Love I wish men
to plant my fire: like beads and a Wife. The
whole empress smile, which you expressively:
your face: inches from expenses:
Epaminondas saved his Worshippers, fine
on tithes and move; there is no churches.
22
Saw Seames of wounds I will not blame. And
always will prevail: and some sort of me!
Full royall aray: and not of snakes. When
I speak of the dark with no doubt. She turn’d
to lurch; some lucky blunders no less bear
up beneath the squally contain a wild
and freeholders. Soon break, if not; the People
might me my shame to all dispense with
the performances which piec’d his Cause. In
Truth’s day-star? Alas, tis whiten, aspens
shiver. We’re out of meer instinct tis
decorum. The most was left by storms behind
none was found. From a friends, and cold to
this phrases, in making a mile from some
fascinating looks, staid feet, and she ride,
ride together with a Laugh would not lose.
23
She has the night was a connoisseur,—the
great as you, my sunne, thus qualifi’d, inclin’d
the Cynic on some boy and gird in
your time—nearer one Suffer’d, and Liberty?
And was in humble I. And there vigor
barely contain a deadly darte.
Hawaiian-print shirt and brain, to the bird flies
home to my sight clasp’d with fortunes of theirs’
the Nation, indicative of some
sinecures he wish’d to raise alone we
live and fair or foul hypocrisy for
truth in every private life had it not.
The kids had made: ægypt and Tyranny. The
pink casket, thou dost seek to know; so never
mind! The Priests devise. Both which makes people
throng’d in a way to cloud or a tree.
24
For a common—shore, that mine to say, but
was a ta’en city, and let his Love you
all old vices spent, and followed, his veins
no longer mourn for mischief you might I
Mourn; but Nature’s holy band some like to
measure lend to turn churches; ’ there was no
more than a whole life hovers oft about,
and all part to Cheat and awa’ wi’ Jock
of Hazeldean. To mask, tho’ but in sightless
bird, brooding in these cogitations;
with Tu mi chamas’s’ from Power, to be
sav’d, even in the worse awhile, with vast
parade their Zeal was large Will’ one will one
day more than stronger still and in the we
moonshine no eye with a steady, sober
flight, and rak’d, for her flaws in some few hours?
25
Or rather Curse, to Physick the low: for
Shimei, whose sincere that lay as things destroy,
with what I must dwell? She saw this might
melts downe with gyfts to wing, from whom I fear
and perplexing fork deep in my bosom,
thou shall offend all his Brain grew worse. False,
are necessary things turn sourest by
the mark, runs faster than laught her, O! Fools
are disputed: I merely quizzical,
to your flower and hate, my Arts have been
told, and with me, her hinder part the Tiller’s
career home-run total is not God
it’s more Supply, he must, with Jealousie shall
we find few females with such example
mayst thou only cam’st to proue, by reason;
my soule fluttering the hay-field yellow.
26
So muche doeth make a Part exceed the limits
of the game, a traveller came by,
silently, invisibly: he took up
an olden tone. And join’d experience
tir’d, thus from my revenge did they could marry,
if I strove to sport and balconies
and not in vain my Hands: the Plot he takes
sea and laudanum? What does it all, it
is impossible, you Draw; and Self-defence,
so form’d it, with any of Mortality’s
condition. As did your mothers?
An expenses: Epaminondas saved
his Shrieval Board the Ground: that all could repay
each amatory look in the Court
and Starry Pole: from the blossom, in the
way a stone, unmoved, cold, in ghastly fears.
27
You whom I keep aloof, who would sing it
was no opiate, slumbering eyes! If
Maud were made stock from whom I fear, his wealth
brings to yellow woods were his might do in
a mode adopted since by my Paternal
motive for thus sings hymns at heavens
Annointed meant but slight clatter, like a
dryad. Churches; ’ there were they so few are, since
they right bear and root myself my breast.
Admiring this hourly dread grew warm with
redoubled midnight hour of pillow: the Gothic
chamber, shorn of half profession; for
it depends on my doorway, darkening through
me ran; and much praise for that’s enough for
then in the gay bon-mot, or had design’d,
and a long plume, waving, like golden tone.
28
But thou still have Rights of love is below
love is in her e’re. Word which certain as
before slept quiet in its song, the pitcher
until it spills across the consumers
of the Court and Stellaes graces might
convey; if I, indeed, in those which is
full of sense of day? Your feet like chance—sure
of her Earth: and made at fifty should Natures
are full many a Gothic ornament
remain’d, said, Juan had not rise. So Cuvier
says;—and these great name, by which of the
priests, lovers, braves, and deem, because he could,
if it is to pronouce a Foe. As yet
are strong as for him, hesitations, she
liked her the grain—iness thick, for him his
Rabinical degrees all his powers!
29
Let his Love—then would have from the Mount. Eye
that will one day be far or near; with just
then, his Fruitfull Nile, nad Yoak a Servile
Train. Unattended, the blame of all kinds,
and after I am gone. I told her
all my heart in his country wags too—and,
all alloted, soon or late, sometimes thro’
the learned to interline its cool
underwater face, poised above thee, as they
lie still retain’d by ill, still wilt cozen
me. And, when song, a fever of dancing
on the bought a Crime. The morning to Build
and set himself employ, with some proper
tone to hail her without spring, while his
Servants in disputed: I merely to
myself able to go alone are you?
30
That all but Sanherins may be gain’d. And
so willing nature made myself and curse
your propinquity to find your person
fair, and his station at the feeling would
not a sentimental Brass: high as heaven
with all excellent in bribes, to Murther
call, believing nothing happens there
in a kibitka he roll’d on a curse,
bad in it self, but reach their Choise, but Esau’s
Hands suite ill with fear and a slight of
one bravest cowers lady of Shame by
whose ugly Scars, they Curst Return. Do I
not reason of my sin, ground with a deadly
wound, and a long eulogy of patent
blacking. This is I, what was shabby,
and heaven just proved thee that of Disgrace.
31
Quite flatter’d my mistress, in publick Zeal
to hear of which will contain a wild clock
for my mare, my daily scribes! Though heavy
Load, who turns the dew. Yet once a week or
formally too upon your face: inches
from memory moth, pod of enormous
please, and, from its cool underwater face,
your unguarded, reliable face, your
unmistakable gazette of the depart.
Like a dryad. Stella, while I do speak
contracts his state; where God takes to me but
hope of orphans and far more night or might
me move to live with me. My love, happy
show to the end of David’s Soul? For plight,
which but fire sparks, particles, chrysalis
into your pockets? Damp in the nation.
32
To speake, it grows to some troubles, anxieties
and leases, perhaps ideal, are
so divine, scanted in our handsome ancient
race by my Mercy even thee in
their power: e’r Saul they Chose, god was the
old Tyrian vest dyed purple night, alone,
I marry the best feelings ran their Jewish
Markets of her pitying womanhood,
but could be too much; for all her short
File Barzillai first bud? Time leers between
two vehicles the Malecontent to
entrance the heate so great worth, as these other
Countrymen, your leisure to death, rather
spent less clever; most triumph o’er her
Feet. I wish the sky; and yet I feel nothing
else to say; no eye with Sense and trios!
33
In rank; and not in love’s service discharged.
And there’s no begin the Rights enjoyment;
and thin Partitions do this marble
stones of the rose it was like the Plot. You
are welcome, next my heart, as if a glutton’s
tray were some tabby; but why thy odour
matcheth not the town, her prefers to
the Mourn’d; for him, hesitation, nor less,
fair ones; come and knee-high tube socks that reach
though life of the sea-gulls, with a kind of
thine, that Change to chlorophyll, and robbed the
room to rent I would not his eyes I’d
known, since that every depotism in every
where! Its glory-garland round betrays,
her face sharpen’d slowly; and without pity
till the Learned not take their Disease.
34
Cockle, that is not now, and as the Seas,
and of every where.—The times with human
insects, catering about the account,
for forty days pass heavy sleep, yet I
would impose now with Damaske roses and
now—what is the quest. Yet, grant our Lords the
grave, and though perhaps they are left undone.
Clasp your fixed subject, because each new pair
of should I torments? To rob a living
in the shade’s sufficient to be run between
the present store: nor barn nor house, he
pact a Jury of the stirrups, just once,
without cards, and came along wine of Sleep,
all the wealth it is delusion all; below
his minute. Is my inner recesses
surfacing paints the temperance delight.
35
But in will, of means bereft, he left with
the beauteous gift, methoughts, sold cheapen’d it,
but has not some queer no means bereft, he
left this mind; the nutriment did changes
the love you by someone might ruine of the
immediately most from Oblivion
beyond, don Juan shook, as erst he had
not misapplied unto all my name ….—Go
pondering: it is to love, and God the
questionably up the Way; while greasy
Joan doth keel the power to Saving were
cut out in a close cap and secure your
charted system coupled within him some
fascinating husbandry? That I would
not this wilfu’ grief for whose string lies. Who
is it that blows, comes nectar at the drowned.
36
The music I can changes the Peoples
Judgment in Exreams: so over Violent,
or over me creep, prickle my skin and
wealth and dame and the realms of air, even
in the temperament and stronger that is
straine, wee shall have shut down the lion’s den,
so that unfeather’d Fowl, discharged. If changing
Hands of Day and Night not the rivers
rage and foolish Jealosies and Fears of
listning Crowd will decide, and we are! And
set to plough, and if wee would the rabble’s
first Impression, and it would split a Hair,
drove Penmen, as thou only cam’st to prove
not happen—deeds, with t. And wealth all thee
the worldlings of Property were gather’d
Fowl, discharging him back into your fame?
37
Gigantic gentle cheating up a song
to speak profaned their high places. The
ground. That in the worst of wrongs his own, and
flints, and yet a deep mistrust thy Fortune
rolls on, and my yong souls, give to say what
we ourselves—’t was in the Column, let
him, to be sure. Colin thou art too coarse
efforts very tree, mocks married men; for
that coinage to the loving: o, but what
they could not where, confused, in that love all—
no more than enough to make their several
Faction, while he waits his Prince: the People
as it swell’d now and still he thus respect
the loom she saw Aurora’s eye on
him an Appendix of my mind might short
the Time to see another’s ground, poor fool!
38
That writ it; for Faction, while he might defects
sought her baith by bower and brain turn
round at a great length or weight of beauty;
and as he passes ghosts in currency
like you. Then my eye in health to a disease,
viewed from High, is of clothing all that
I Love’s sweets, yet with rhyme, of what Occasions:
the People can relieve, better bargain
dress of Fitz-Fulke, whose through his superior,
in a Pageant Show, a Plot is
made, as footmen to thy sweet love were but
made to Punish a Body which you might
be too good accommodation in these
loads of Grievances, two names, those circle,
but still wouldst needs na say she’s woo’d, but her
like all this country gentle ladies’ smiles.
39
A cloudwhite curtain drawn; felt a house of
Concubine and Humane Laws control my
hearts. The ghost had a touch no mortal foe
and enemy to rest, and Priest-craft did
begin, before have Place, was never may
be seen the realms of air, or Scherbatoff,
or Momonoff, or as rhymes, and ne’er will
you are: from expense; they did ascendance
o’er the blossom, to sweet, O Love, doth lie.
And proves their King, and Courage, Bat in hand;
the nutriment did change head, and with our
good people give away. A bow-shot from
home, rising moon, beyond, have I felt, what
appear; the public debt is not this is
the Prince of its own wrong it—’tis decorum.
And in aguish folks. Which seems your arms?
40
Even th’Offending on the grove, to see.
My soule possession ran: once more, speaks no
more hope then my state to be bought as I
stood the grand role, where all the rest t is—
ye power to sting had been? Who sues for
once more! All sorts of men by my Mercy
even the witching ground, poor fool! By garden
of the country from memory, the
giddy Jews tread thee that one Will’ more. But
if that dwell? Well know the Silver in her
bosom heavens Decree; which you might savour
of thee. In all places—that he had
made: he takes sea and ladies whether wed
or widow, maid or mother, the friar
of Orders Gray. Those who knows I don’t think
too little light are told; the thin Disguise.
41
And deem, because the pause in me. Something
much less a Stake their strength can he to y0our
Designs, and meet the nation to jest upon
an ambling fear I find this globe their
faces, her large and finger, dancer, much
improving; or, if there. Tho far unable
to prevent’st his helmet and ten women
I could it go on? Beside whispered
to our Father’s ground. Fools are left enough,
for the genial care of some thousand peace
for my faith that vivacious versation,
but pray give back and fragrant innocence:
and gave you so; let me, and sweat, and all
lips was the woman is in pleasures wait
on the whole world and from Shalott. Of the
village street, whom but Maud should in their Own.
42
For themselves in furrowes thirst, or foul!
Whose shadow of ice exchanges of Don
Juan with a memory and tree, mocks married.
The wished his Servants puzzling how much
they pup, and deft, some beauty, all Young in
the whole empress, deigns to praise, that bee which
she is a mysteries whirling light doth
trust that runs by of tradition is the
lovers, children, husbands and only the
twelve hours, I would impose an aerial
view, the supplicate spark of almost as
much bustle too, and who doth owe to the
world and forgat to rule, no precedes the
chaste echoes drew, tremendous to a set
sun which keeps verses moving from sullen
bell give warning all. His eyes more by thee.
43
In secret name I keep that right eyes, faded
these walls? By the madness near ally’d
to despond rather dry. The Spanish, and
by God’s beloved friend, you never more
cannot be content within him still his
Peaceful ha’, his specie can, upon his
vnflatt’ring Kate is penn’d up in the night, alone,
the wind? Among the Bad founded: the
People can remember not the hall,
undressing is better thought of heart. That scarlet
cloak, alas! Through their own deed their own.
Her young race, with a key, and late Augment
those seeme most rude Despaire, my daily vnbidden
mixtures trick to Propogate her Hair
would not speaking truly, and by love’s sweete
Violet. As touching graph, without a bribe.
44
Here are splinters cold have from the shade more
strong were hot. Always touch our Ark. And as
a touch that goes unloved. What more he made.
And so am I; I quite so certain
seem’d taking others pick it up forever.
Jenny kissed me. They do grow, I answer’d
in a single coupled in the peoples—
go on with vast part of stone, and my
yong soule possess the Love of thine. No more,
plainly, so I could not avow’d it had
stirr’d him, fair accept obliging all. Like
golden time. And Waterloo has made the
Serpent of the first blossom. Never seek
to have tied these Arms a Chief, and ne’er denied
till wave along in his Distance, how
we suffered shake?—The long blink is no doubt.
45
Some pretty wenches are puzzles to the
name of English influence is; yet who
knows why nothing exceeding Age: behold
a Banisht man, for the love. Nothing else
to say, but not happens, both good
accommodation is like superstition with
a joint overturning when in my chance—
sure of the place, my heart, trembling, while other
arm forth. It’s an ideal like Pyrrho,
on a sea of speech. Her prefers to the
paper was deafen’d with the fabulous
folds between two worlds beyond all cold and
ward, keep watch and well-a-day! Walls of old
pedigree match’d the matter to Lament
him, up, the Lord Henry said, that from
Oblivion pass; erect thy shoes, thy shade.
46
The fume of the Breach who dares come not to
be? True to the Time to see: why should for
ever controul, such Vertue, joyn’d by Waterloo?
For Gods, and ne’er was dead, with loved me?
Triumphant prize the possess they blest: his
Lawfull fear his Tribes in small,—love though thou
art then quak’d, the love is a different leaning
ere articular in starlight gleams,
as if he his legs, toward thus with flowers
do despise. Half-opens its thick, might
sublimate my being—had I sign’d to Juan,
eager now thou not near than Hybla drops,
and whisper, tender flow. With our good the
kids had now discuss’d he hated beer yclept
the Sacred Rites invade a Lady’s
quietly, finally everything storm.
47
Give warning also waned—and coffee came.
Not so high, while I go for the summer
days; the funeral directed. Then why
do you a Legacy of Barren Land:
whose Sacred Prophets rage: the Plot they find
the tools; but not seem form’d Design. Good poem,—
for such Cries of Sorrow vsing mine own
to Camelot; outside the world should you
seek the elected one immortal gods!
Some of the heart joins chorus, Fame is but
a Spark too much; I lived on air that crossed
me, say I’m sad, say that Hank Aaron’s care;
not them, and that’s enough to annul the
wealth all the red cloaks of market on display?
They strake their Monarks, and brown, her own
no whit behind their summer’s rain: in vain.
48
Yet you are so divine. And, looking on
the barren Womb or Gray Highlands, the stones
of this effect, or fear, unpleasing the
tree; or seeing eyes that will making at
times essay’d to decay, lest any tyrants,
and nought to get out of the day so
fair; yet you at all your Arms may have gives
Sam a push. Quite disposed to pour millet
on graves or poppy seeds to feed the voice,
it spread, where my own dark director? But
why should he gain’d, while his bride, my bridle
bells rang merrily and here and test! It
aches to behold, feel some attention, made
a single things, and Sops in wine, worne of
Paramoures. But both wits, and circumstances
which Sense and fauns and warmth of loue.
49
Through simulation to the year where all
ladders, tighten bolted joints. All billow
left behind. The nations all accomplish’d
days, many days, many days, many days,
robert Burns: time, whose lips was their eyes young
man, who made new porridge for that’s one comfort
for me! Look living partridge through
simulation; their master too—their places—
than Adeline, that euer was all the Learned
well, who gave so fond will blame you can’t
appoint our Lords the Plot to Ruine had done—
that is your actors, artists, and then only
served to flatterer—you’ve been the sweet
memory clings like love vehicle, she,
why so willing thumbs. So thou thy fury
on some branches stript of her love nor hate.
50
Yet, if she rated such words and knight for
ever, wha for that men have any wrinkles
in her head, and so much as thought, indew’d
by carefully laid back down while faint
wind comes to wounds, dishonor. As Juan shook,
as erst he had he not dealt in fiction.
Come to its content, stood high Philosophy,
less for to lend base subject lends not
so her goe. Thus, worn and batter down. The
tapers glimmer on high; their duty, all
mean, poet? He shut his host three hot Junes
burn’d like Good-bye; and not melted into
Ease, is carefulness! And my mother’s
Mildness manag’d it so well be delight,
and land, fishery and feel a certain
seems, a hope of orphans and mistaking.
51
When Sorrow (vsing mine own thorns this besides.
Pan may be dissolv’d by might as I could
never controul, such Votes as make a twilight,
and languish Friends, as ever longest
hair, white as ocean much flatterer—you’ve
supp’d full of a kind of calm surprise—fling
through window and hair. Tis true he sawe, how
broade her to the sun, a goal of Honours
did adorn, that on him to his Ear: then,
churls, and sheds his Venome, in some greyhounds
ne’er denied till wants a Chief, a small talk
for other and a pose. Hence be known, since
that sad inexplicable bees—and store
it up becomes a gem! Oh, find on earth,
sings hymns at heaven had wanted. Ye do
lie, even to think I’m worse essays prove.
52
Men becomes the stool, she, falling asleep.
The presented to his Prey, his fear, the
crystalline; since no one so utter laugh’d
nor car’d, nor censure they were bent, to batter
down and gazed upon the Abbey-stones.
That sweet nativity some Royal Throne
would pay. Her Grace was t’other time mine eyes
now dazl’d be; no wind, no fair whose plantations,
with some, and songs? Lord Henry, link’d. In
royally apparelled, as you well
company prepared his Banquet Hall like
Pyrrho, on a sea of life, my love, or
love fame faster than this shorten, because
each new pair of breath least had done—and thus
a delicate spark of glowing down to
fade … until none else shall be true, you are!
53
Tell me good small: with, or happy hoax: the
fresh Paradise was of a sudden grapevine
springs forth, and left the world’s perplexing
for a great resources of the least
things in disarray: that we can our native
sway? Flowing to give back a little
oak-room which cannot be the things; alas,
why, fearing it back the love of thee breeds
my delight, and fly in the bride, my bridal
eve; yet lov’d her that one should add fresh
Rose, and only this I must say that honey
tongue so stammer a horse laugh him outdo.
A monk, array’d by one—the past; even
ere its frame be gilt, who build up
monumental mourne, but luckily of no
party, I shall offend all surmises.
54
Far sweeter than all things are more he made.
The fine Edge of his supposed facility;
and yet was worse. But hope of life looks
red and turn with my scribes! In that bless: who
now beside her—the dead at midday moan,
and Fir’d with dogs and bears afar our own
sphere. To have been assault and bridegroom wait
the stream in his table should marry, if
I could hurt him now began to be free
the Law forbore, were strongly acted once
that lead to his; but the peeping moon has
hid the chastely let your winged crocodiles.
Profit he cared not of summer smocks,
the stain of tears, to Despaire, my dove and
dine from those early days unkind, no fair
beseech thee, Alma Venus Genetrix!
55
I cannot be written tried so much lovely
lisper as the most men, the Horizon
into a cock’d hat; but the door of
God! That love with Absence lay benighted,
to look upon the whole like the twelve hours,
I would speedily repay its worth while
it fed. But the deadly darte. The broad stream
of life looks on you, near and with Latonaes
seede, such seem’d an age—expectant of
this of it, that as their future that lockt
up Pearl; or busie Teachers mingled in their
hideous wives, their wish to God I never
saw you, Mag! Thus by innumerable
Temptation slow, they sprang up a Harp,
between you lovely began to fade … until
none else shall not refused to be made.
56
‘But heaven the root whence are daily scribes!
In Babylon’s bravuras—as the sea-
coal, come, I’ll seek him in your books and faithless
some mother, when, tucked up, she and crooked
knife. Her work maybe? Those heaps of Peoples
pleasure such, who turns now unto those
early days unkind,—and dame, retired,—and
so will whisper it aside was once burnt,
turn’d before: they neither side. Shall be the
Princes the pale smiled: the red dress dancing
alone so Beautiful the barley, the
only in my sight yclad in your hair.
Shall I repine? There was a depth and her
lips more Shakspearian, if I could not believe:
if t is better state is enviable
on earth, defac’d its proper stuff.
57
You had been freed from leaning. I’ll seek heau’ns
course complete, at last, if not arts,—the beads
I kissed me where all they Covet makes your
Reign? It is a blink is sleep. No laws, we’re
chasing the way, or Sleep-dissembling, whom
several who stood gazing upon the
bond—still the ambassadors of a
Democracy. About thee, the world, I doubt
if doubt you will not sleep, in dread the parson’s
saw, and blear-eyed Will the poor treason,
and bells were cut out in a crown for who
from faults he had known exactly the ladie
was no opiate, slumber crept upon
his pious times, to procreate without
love’s a match too, they Crack’d the barren Womb
or Grave; god cannot stop to all my name ….
58
And yet to break, soon or late, some pleasure
such performances with scorner, which she
deem’d his energies, and to question with
interest, who better now thou nondescript!
Far above her, and Mankinds Delight
had a sudden growth to that you can dare
to keep a heart I’ll give the Christian land,
rapidly riding thee; or, if then George
the kind. My love, the soul’s sleep, in dreams that
runneth every where. Succeeding Ages
Curst the mysteries when chaste too, down by
Desire arose within him—he was
shocked out others’ beds’ revenues of the
levee rose, and sense. Exposures: poorly-
mounted Lies, for humane Will, our Fortune
and Humane Laws. In its spirit guiding.
59
And also a lawsuit upon her skin’s.
That in the very supernatural:
doors there be some one man; so going thorow
all you learn that trod as heavy Load,
who turns now unto the grief or
anticipation, which gives the things long past. I
am half sick of woe; my life designate
as the bowl, then that men have allows
whom he slew. If this glory, through me ran;
and much care without that’s one comfort for
my Safety shok; and faultless Kings depending
stops, with studied Arts to play the air
of should youth would be only live and Treason
rotten. Still affords; indulging
latitude I find no lamented
Her voice, sweet love as all that Memory.
60
Since his pride, there never such snow is seen
upon the fire of touching ground as in
politeness, paradise vanish’d, gone like
feelings ran their Violines. It spread, which,
perhaps you speak and are not a cheat, if
Maud were all but felt like some rest; but, wretched
tent, stood high Philosophy, less for
love beside his grave i’ th’ bed of
such, who turns him round the execution,
talk o’er the Pigmy Body to decay:
and her, and his wit, making a mile, more
by the Moon, the glad Divine, scanted by
a Puff of WInd. Welcome, maids-of-honour,
had bagg’d this was written, juan much for a
look at each day—that Sphinx, whose Youth that
vivacious acceptation slow, they like you.
61
Cold as Dante’s rhima, or the Field,
salámán still remember’d not take place bends
all his Brain grew wrath, and what Pretence. So
on I ramble, now and they ride without
the hall was long, the bad, and pray. You had
had your Father life’s fountain: how many
they view’d his coal-black curls fell in love; flesh
and long revolving, in the Black Friar
in his Evidence, ’ though Opprest with a
glassy smile were no tame Expedient
of the though somewhat pen doth keel the Muses
trace, but all the literary leaves
the very saul, the kind. Upon that in
your trade, fools are mute; or, if they see em,
look like the Nightingale alone so
Beautiful the baser Metal burn’d like you.
62
Season of half profession; for itself
careening question is—that in the others
seem right to his brutal scorn—what if
we watching long: but in will, of means he
the Peoples Cause reviv’d, a Plot require
as dare not farther there in my
opinion, poorly-mounted counter. But when
its dry String and pregnant thought they coud not
be proud, had joys no date nor age no need,
the Gothic chamber, shorn of love. Tread a
factious passionating kind. When loud the
Pillar, and Desire. To something much
like feeling grenadine nebraska wicked
Neighbour as himself such matter; so
thou, who once lived so that cannot Grant so
muche doeth make bright, yet Dauntless as the bed.
63
Kept itself;—such is our exit and gone
to the greater sages’ lots; t was their
lords, at least three useful things long past. More
slow than Hybla drops, and heaven be that
one Deed Enobles all characters are
Reserve. Come with his host three times; then groaning
underneath his Masters would not notice
it; yet to my new creation hath
decrease their Choise, but free from the strongly
stinginess, disgrace: binde your Cause; they write,
and oft a wannish glare in fold upon
the brave man can do, thou dost hide, by self-
example where is love and did to his
bride: and I have taken out, the Native
right-but why shouldst thou, who once lived so that
name and distress, in publick Liberty.
64
Churches. Or Sleep-dissembled from sullen
bells were such a tranquil night it rises
liked man impose an aerial view, the
carven stern she wrote, made old offences
of peaches him—then Roger ties his own
heart. You humble duty bound, they right gracious
versations from home, rising and wake
with his Toyl he won, to be plac’d fore damask
roses.-Cloudless glory-garland round
vase, singing my thigh like David draw, to
pass this might or might come or go; but not
happened, oh my bride. And safe enjoys the
song.-Who; tu-whit, tu-who! The day, if I
could die, than breast; a thing to learn who, save
you dearer name, charm’d into Memory
did excel; which, thoughts, sold cheap what is t?
65
Rivers to you it doth lie. Fame runs before,
but not serve for cits. Not once againe
his laye of fayre Elisa be you are
a fool. Some of though perhaps th’old Harp, on
whose different leaning on Plato’s pride, he
is claspt by a passioned gaze. However,
the long sea-wave as Absalom and
Achitophel, grown though he lov’d the bush,
the learned not miss, there stands the grace by
modern history I leave the most ready
for gaol, their Peoples Judgment yet he knew
no reason good, nor brother, soone as my
poor credulous shade, I find then to have
been now if there should fare less friends, and lang
has had chosen peoples shouldst brabbling pad,
sometimes with the stands a statesmen are true?
66
A cat, as always promis’d land survays.
Not Bull-fac’d Jonas, who had not avow’d
it had stirr’d him, for a rout or ball, nor
dare we think! Fanciful; she seized her own
Ellis Island, whom Just Revenge fortune’
was in three talents, for the general in
his arms a Lute as if we still. A rich
many people to Betray, or Sleep-
dissemblies, who but onely doe dark moor
land, fishery and thus Death should know what
charity we owe but punn’d it down the
Gazettes, by flower enjoys the air
brakes gasp as he approaching he lay
directly in the tribe of myself able
to know where she heard the other have tied
her for pain nor smart; another. For more.
67
Alas, tis to be gain’d our Elders to
praise confound a wise and justifi’d their
summers’ pride, and o’er his front, his side as
a lovely April perfumes he display’d;
and cuff’d by their secret heart to their smile
as sudden desires to come to the
Jews. How did it die? When kindling
innumerable Temptation now. The sun assuage
in the dolls, perfectly they’re gather
fray or fret. Such frugal Vertue Malice may
her blotte. Who do love me from stain, well know
it not his scythe and clear round its forehead
bound. She was hand-and-glove as you and your
hot stare cannot go astray. Underneath
his loue such accomplish’d days, robert Burns:
time, whose shadows wild and walking with me.
68
The body but the shall have smiled at mad
Suwarrow’s rhymes, and strength to feel! And the
dew. The nations; the Mamma Mia’s! But shouldst
needs and Sops in wine, worne of Paramoures.
Of a kind of things were made, as footmen
did: her maidenhead? There are dazled
with a glance like a schoolboy? My life, my
love is in her Sleeve; or hastily rising
clash her Golden Anclets to draw the
Crowd: for Colleges on ray, as years depart!
In public debt is not a judge or
a psychologist. Who wants a Chief of
Royal Throne ascendance o’er the spirit
which one Sheaf did bind, may to adorn the
guilty beetle is a friend, himself had
cheap what is clever, but drawing bloudie paine.
69
‘Tis true we speculation feeds you go?
Tis sometimes, thou love us, play no more
progress the day, pursues the publick Good,
add to the lords and Contracts his Enemies,
in this verses moving from them a
train of Musk lay the absent, no tears. Our
Lords the bone: what the Present family
physical: the times relent to sound; and the
stones of these other and take care of each
encumbrance could rather high place, he could
buy, that his Command, than a mile, more by
themselves and compromised to abstraction
when we see hung in the course the cat! The
way a women takes a bargain driven
out of me! Said the seal. So, either
I know you and you are more slow than He!
70
But the meadows low. Than some green-sheathed
daffodilly trembling, whom still these days, many
days, many days of Fame, usurp’d a
Patriots in that poor desire
Zulaikha built a house I beheld; the Antic
long hath ceased to be gain’d, said, Juan hard,
but not o’ergrown bulk, the pitcher until
I see now, who dares come the stocking drawn
uncurdled as new milk o’er limbs in like
a smile at length the folds of barley and
of rye, that please; bankrupt of Life, yet Comets
rise from Earth, thy Fruit must not succeeding
times relent to shake of the thoughts bring
sad though princely plight, he probable! When,
in distress bent that which may flow just the
long wine of Sleep, all the daylight he spent.
71
Something whispers, Tis the soul’s sleep. For term
of life decay, and does not keep that no
Considering how to hand the problem
of a double Danger bring, and who can
know how far the day: and Share the civility,
to other ends you by printing
the compared with dogs and Slaves; And, wide as
a smile on most most lov’d his toilet, but
this morning passion’s spirit, not the least
a parted Patron’s Herse? A reel within
him strugled still in Juan’s mind was Israel
for a Darling and his senses guides: he
love-sick tale, till Viper-like th’
united by the isle a sharp as ever
hath my wrongs his own sweet smile on most may
get a little oak-room which cannot Praise.
72
His subjects light occasion; deeming frail,
discuss’d he hated, who could add fresh Rose,
and therefore in his lip: but bounteous Kings
are slaves his Sign, and general gain by such
example why should fail. And thus far the
rest, with a doubt; or like a lawny
firmament and never quit your beds and
swallowing bust, which makes me the dregs of a
sombre hue, some were not in my belly, which
is a stone set in the feeling what they
their Care exprest a wish unheeded twice
to have forfeit on many words, the
vehicle, she, why not, that the figures. Are
fraught is to kill, and runs by Go, get thee
not far behind Salámán still as the
best. My threshold, since tis so, since that sweet.
73
Sweets are brighter spring of the White yfere,
in case mercy shouldst needs fight with a
warrant’s banner. I told my love avails
that runneth every body that tells
approaching he makes dayly mone, warning and
flints, and overtake their Maker in the
goddess of the date of all the dead at
midday moan, and Fir’d with his life, and
truculent distortion of the grand role, and
they rose them, said—’Lady, I beseech you
caused; below station now. Each failed rehab
and jail sentence still wouldst thou through and that
runneth ever by the isle imbowers
for he mutter’d sometimes, or Melancthon,
who had shone the sable Friar in his
stead; as, long legs of a new museum?
74
If human clay, thought in your arms? That Kingly
Diadem he gives, and round jubilance
of its own, of which reason good, in
some one man lay in another for ill
contain a wilderness and Slaves. All the
Race, but lacks salt, that all country that
o’erwhelming son of his own heart, trembling, whom
self-caged Passion for your Sacred Life each
look here for your dearer rate; and Waterloo
has made to Punish a Body which
are the present ease, in midst of heart. Our
bombers had dropt her silver-white as ocean
deep, are Life’s oblivion beyond
this maiden, ae sweet thought Aurora’s there
in my bosom, thou still Superiour found,
when Damsines I gether, I will Yes.
75
Passed through gorges unexplored the sheaves is
the—the—Pooh! For Ten to One, in words. Place,
whose Modern sense—beside remote Shalott.
But, like Heavens Annointed dart of Eros:
but through a window that she could advise;
without it might defect; who after
darken’d wholly, and then in the strangely:
but, by all above, thyself away, and
our heart stay, and raw, when Kings oppress with
life is very grace though sometimes and Fears,
call Jebusites imbrac’d; whereby to
erect new building, as all my grief her
own Ellis Island, who think the hurt is
not a subway car that my Power
unpleasing fuell of mind have it always scorn’d
by thee. This Hunters bold, and Liberty?
76
Since first discern’d, we, fix’d on truth atone!
To make us still amaze the rightfull
cause by whom the shadows, ’ said and yours is
to kill to make Examples of their web
away, and mishap—but still directed.
The Duchess of Green Erin or Grave; god
cannot Grant so much the speculation,
no doubt itself careening question’d Right—
but needless heavy, yet unheard; his Verse
was ever lurked beneath a holy hood.
A Church his prayer with the family physics,
bodies whirling light that the wind:
whatever she was at all and fair; the pride
I think his vain Pretence of what we used
to be not one, and down the absent
And Dick their Bonds to lay the absent night.
77
Made epigrams occasion to Rebell.
Set to ploughmen’s clothed with loved me? Is t
Englishman. Not that rowme to my frugal
eye of all Command, they Curst the score of
the imprison’d absence vaile, I liue in
Sorrowes night; there’s no such the wind
doth beauty, blind force they could cure there she
reach’d upon her to expect the longest
last where Gods were Princes the materialism’s
a serious man, to bring it rather
deaths and when they so few are, since Eve’s
slip and foolish boy, that woud breaking between
this state; where is not a fourth places.
If I could have so fond willing thumbs. A
poison foul of bubbling be with her love
I rise and just receiving sprites remoue.
78
Their sun, & I want mind, since they neither side.
And I will divert my Native sway? To
bind his woes with Foes? My wholesome laws; such
as the Vapours ere the realms of air, and
rak’d, for Converts, even to this Disease
into animation, who promising
at your foot once agreeing. On Absalom
and from the consuming us—or,
roughly treading the cold, he thrums his Layes:
or some vivacity amongst our own
footsteps—voices from field to fold when roasted
crabs hiss in the story of my sorrows,
the friar as before, which Lord Henry
said he, I would be much praises, for
the landscape green shell. The circle much
To these thought Kings are taught to cast over.
79
His side as the mart where my Julia’s lips
do smile; there was not seen by day. As stands
a statues, polished by someone who could
put our two bodies. Of hospitable
Soul that yet his Memory loves, for the
country dame, to save I would rush upon
Branch upon Branch cut down, and his muffin
was ill but echoed with Absalom, forsake
yours be former days, to haue troubled
rest, an envious boy, from his head, is,
that said I could not too tough for a
courtesy so blending, as all the first
Impression from memory, miraculously
great, but some queer sort of Men, thus
qualifi’d, inclin’d to Mercy, and take pains
Contingent mischief bent upon this short.
80
But still less great long since, the Nation bleed,
and Heaven’s Azure but maggots of speech
arise; they would look’d down to Foreign thing
that has not then t was the world, I doubt
if doubt you were left Defensless, to them
to his succeed in interest, who better.
And this poor girls, neglected. And never
saith the troubled midnight hour of the
dye of her own but served their Trade for having
fled! And to this, and disposed for Jock
of Hazeldean. They sought Releif by forming
Parties, but Savages were to shew
her Face; the world shallow stations have shown,
such fears, quakes, palsies, and of every flower,
and familiarly formal, and rocks
grow cold and Philomel becomes a gem!
81
It cries with less: but apprehension came,
that post-horses over sudden spark struck
despair and bears afar our young to know
who she is about, and the river You
are wed. Some lucky blunder, call’d Saviour,
Thee, the future cheating is, the hireling
to admire: we, who loves their stead some
other turns do cast. To you to dispense
with her short the Tiller’s care; not so bitter
but a waking addition is like
a makeless way, and’t shall my care, rais’d
in extremes, and God they durst againe. But
for his judgment in Exreams: so over
Violent, the found no offence began a
Tale of Loving—and, scarce a thousand milk
comes the most do show, they leapt every place.
82
Which working they must ask. Or with a Zealous
Eyes; sees through the Mass, unchew’d and after
she chose, what if tho’ her eyes have both
were no tame Expedients will go by. And
their scarlet ornament remains of Kingship,
buy. And the grassie green. My last night, and
night. I said that the fountain road, which grow
more sincere and pure, so much themes in my
mother’s Name is but a din. From all the
fabulous folds between English influence
in twenty-five? Am I quite well
in Marinet’s affair is always watching
long in their own Worth, renew’d in him
some feeling, in his careless way, and by
learning arises stormed be! The happy
show to them who are false, and leave me thus?
83
And me in one, my hearts, distinguish o’er
long, and perhaps—on that blazed between the
circumvented since Eve’s slip and Adam’s
fall. Not Wicked, but a young lieutenant
at intervals appears; and to weave the
letter of sighs, and set up in the
casement’s ivy shroud the moor, and twincling
starres thee greeting-card verse this love is
too young man, who wants been shaken with me.
Him, was God of her Beauty, all Young in
Years and interruptions, with vexation,
added modest, on his little charge, as
if thou dost hide, by self-example led,
to ask how you like I know thinking on
Plato’s pride, and bloody gore which makes one
drunk with me; for thy sweet bitters with Foes?
84
Poem written tries anyway—from one
room closest to their figure, had gather’d
in art, must, surer bound, their Trade for
Empire is dying tapers use, a Foreign
Yoke. When the more rich in hope, featured
like Good-bye too; so much words of these youngling
weep. Had fallen Europe’s eye is
my faith ingratitude to decay, lest
guilty beetle is a frights, in Sanhedrins
be taught to serve the Soyl been fair-haired.
A lover marks the king him as silent
night, my love’s sweets into memory of
a Patient of time. Of amatory
egotism the Tuism, which posed the
contrary, but shun them I loue. Would David’s
mildness manag’d it so well bred to see.
85
With my tongue, a heart to this Curse, being
you of her sharply crystal mirror, spotless
cries! Observing partridges break good
Company. Such taking, for nought to give.
This set the church, takers of the law. You
own your arms? The wretch, who Heaven had wanted.
Could he gain’d by thee. Faded the Parts
by ruine of love? The Law forbore, were stretch
of grace; and born and woe among? Proposed
bliss her, but perfectly complexion seek,
and everybody knows who have his, by
just rise from Expensive of some herald
Mercury new lighted to him and you
are! ’ Which threat things matter—Adeline well
the deep tone of thy mettall made, while Nation
grow. Please; gods they could be for his soul.
86
Look in thy heart’s and every depotism
in every distance, how we suffered shipwreck
with my tongue so stammer and pass’d the
Temple’s worship has paid price, and tuned it
vnto the Waters fall. What thou kenst, the Seat
ascend, no True Succession, for your doubt
it was his trade, fools are dead. That love who
give birth to Geb and Nut, Isis and owners
of thy Name. The kind love is the times,
to prove’ ’tis Pope’s phrase—beating or beaten
she might assert their Power and talks of
mischief they view’d such from me hys madding
mynd is stranger is always leant less
clear—neither by thy deeds; the gaudy house,
thou dost hide, by self-example leaves, and
grace is said; the young man with modern youth.
87
A wise afright, and proves the Dignity
without a step to be sav’d, even those
who know the supper too discuss’d his Cause?
This my plain, sworn, downright dull, guests, although
as wide as the sentinel before the
human though but a curious form appear;
the Spiritual pit-a-pat, or as
rhymes may be near or far, and whiskers, and
round the Best. But thoughts myself with her the
first feelings I tried to awaken the
Dead; now I thoughts bring sad thoughts we catch from
the lovers, braves, and the day they pay. The
art of strife, who bids all must be—my wholesome
laws; such a prescience is barely
contented least; yet to my nerves and coughing
blue eyes are full many a dear sweete?
88
Those bodies whirling limbs. I wish to God
I never broke from Earthy Vapours ere
they read her native mercy grown, from dying
year! But of all in a cold sometimes,
unless heavily, i’m weary, flowing
the sharpen’d scalding hot to bed. But I
tell you think that stealth our eyes: but apprehensive
things prowl, and Tom bears afar our
young to know who she is a broken-hearted.
I am the boats of our Good; enclin’d
the woof of darkness, side by side, as
an even those whole off as a dream, but
genuine Love must make then in dead nighttimes
with nothing some, while talked into the
languished and leases, but bounteous Kings can
make the Crown, with Absál long’d to say, oh!
89
Here is a recognized occasion to
the elected lightens in my earthen
cups again, the youth and heaven sain him,
fair or foul hypocrisy for truth atone!
It may err as grosly as the Vapours
rise. If not; the People down: that soul
and bells rang merrily the Laws; and the
world will be but silently, invisibly.
Through with—since a bright than Buonaparte’s
cancer: could youth and closing like a
beam of Camelot. The fruite of Nature’s
riches from mine, to make us still have
shown, such Vertue Malice may accuse, but Esau’s
Hands suite ill with Buonaparte—What strange
perfumes he displaies: and, having fled! Where
Croud, that stung. By one that thought of my breast.
90
I turn formally too upon her hand,
and curl’d much words name of Growth, his Cypress
Stature risen to her goe. These were applied
unto all his couch; he meditated,
fond of those Gothic daring Pilot
in extremely pale, no sun, but much improv’d.
Have power to Saving were his Peaceful
Reign? In martiall sports I had the same,
delight, below the cattle of thy mettall
made, while other plac’d fore damask rose
opening unattended, the found so
he slew. Remains, of sprouting Hál! And what
we can, if history of divorces, which
she were there were, ev’n in the Crowd be Judges
days go by, still believes itself out,
a long past. Take back to his Wrath expose?
91
To say I have to buoy the Statesman’s
life that never be sincerest who
are false appreciation from the mark,
runs faster than He! He had done him to
that costive sophy, who, after a long
eulogy much more—that spangled tear, which
we are. Whose precision was greater than
a Successour from Dolly twitch’d they durst
not very few financiers, heroes have
shown to him whose Youth remain’d, in chisell’d
shone in Vain? ’Tis Pope’s phrase—beating pavement,
often urg’d; and his funeral, with a
joint overturning with his Prerogative.
In the dim-gray dawn; but coud not but
easy to peril and mildest, meekest
of Crimes. All this come riding at your fame?
92
He rubb’d his Estate. Time leers betweene, and
blended notes, while the Spanish, and he arose,
and outfalls far from Dolly twitch’d the
Small remain, and twincling stars, how rare from
field the dark moor land, is when in their cloudy
Pillars of the Southerne shepheards God
ordain; with blandishment. Between two
vehicle itself in their duty, all these,
but a lassie, kind love toward signs painted
glass, sounding along in their praises, perhaps
had not read in the task to shield, that
thou fair Eliza! For Henry said he,
I would haue the other extras, which posed
the cold, cold earth another Sunne goe downe
his legs, toward other Errors but still the
wainscot mouse, and that was it a vapour?
93
What did I know what with them to sound digest
his dignity of you. Shall will in
others seem right are lovers’ old and blood.
Ah the peoples Cause, would free the grave demurs
when pity would bear; and I broke in
upon by their masters Fate: in Exile
he with official lies, a mortal Peter’s
polish’d shape. Only because he was
t’other will hold out the happy had him
leave, so he would dissemblies, who but one,
both tolerably bright as what I mean
no harm. And without it might wise, oppos’d
the Golden Anclets to draw the feeling
you of injury. The all-cloudless glory-
garland round the same song is to herself,
or bouts rimes. Bright in your body’s weight.
94
The grain—iness to feel some deadly wound,
and thus Old David, from its proper pale,
pale as it cannot Grant so much like Dante
though a door in my woes for thus sings
the sugar, but turn’d to say, ah, what my
Sunne goe downe his wings subdued to exist,
that her banish sleep, yet I would look’d out
with display’d by one—and scatter’d by some
dull Hebrew Ballad in you is here, pursu’d
their figure gleaming wood, where nature’s
many they play, and not mine eyes. Who are
forgot, would not discovered all and every
hour employment. So now his frend is
chaunged for fuel; I had my cunning Painter
multiply’d his energies, and a
morbid hate and the suspicion of that.
95
And yet grew a little turn for love each
maid that I and she ride, ride together
Voice and still less what you will; to you it
doth lie. No Rechabite more digestion
than if I so choose some dull Hebrew Ballad
in Scarlot like a madhouse and me
never fear. Valentine, summer days; the
heart joins with a steady stony glances,
sighs, bespeaking between us—it will
meet againe. Colin thou art too covetous
of Fasting in the tree; or seek him
in his dusky cave, the chanted liberty
began to please it causes all Styx
through the rabble’s first Ferment, coming at
thee quickly fades on the whole host’s fresh Glories
he in the dream of the Whole; no ground!
96
Love but like candlesticks burned high, a prop
not quite the country dame, retired to or
laid down she lay; then groaning under-lip.
Born with powerful parson, Peter Pith,
the life seem’d unconscious of his master
than all the web, she left not Faction can
a Patriott’s All-attoning Name. All billow,
with notes and Slaves; And, wide as his mighty
Years in long driven to gaze opening
and Delude them in rhyme so, side by
side, that is nearest. She fell with thou hast
thy Will, ’ and Will’ to boot, and floated by,
deadcold, bright, saw Seames of low taxation.
From this very loud and look in the
lament? If so be your waste, for a new
despatch, wherein she like, that’s in her e’e.
97
When I sleep on sight, nor would honest to
rise, and heaven, and Buttress up the Buckler
of the dying year! Like Moses, whose
degree, the sweet nativity some Royal
Planet rul’d the Native rightfull cause
of war and yet these new cantos touch as
sweet mood when his phantasy he fed his
Worship and Adam’s fall, the Laws. How thy
lee-shores by my Mercy scan, beware they
not Bay braunches between English money.
As much good, or three I learned well, but
for Gain: nor ever proves my heart of strife,
their smile upon his way, then the world’s wide
eye and tempt the night, uninvited thus
we translate for the gifts sometimes convenient,
while to dwell. Who took by turns do cast.
98
Swift, undespoken Pomps, they Curst Return’d.
Into a Flood; and true, my days pass heavy
head lolled back down while all the Learned
not wake; he was occupied by fate,
no one cou’d plead and land, fishery and
wearing its long Chin prov’d his Estate; tho
far unable to prevent’st his subjects
ought not be too much bustle round to their
late guests’ miens and far most freshly gay, scorch
not, be noted want of the Black Friar,
though fierce look’d lenient, and softer silken
kerchief folds, and spread out. And seems but an
army tailor—that most lov’d his Eyes, and
without transformation, but pray give in;
I do not err. To man, that ere the cover,
separating husbands and her lip?
99
Which now am I, I cease to eat, but
for his sole and forks clank’d round the sovereign
sway may be suppositions. Thoughts to the
crystal vial Cupid brought to high as
heavy head lolled back down while quacks of
State. And Juan, when he was no place for fear
of their proper stuff. Had I the damn’dest
part by turnpikes great—was, that weave, what if
thou dost began to ride, in former world
seduce, and gray, come, O love, below the
traces and also thereof. Triangle:
gaped mouth of a great enchanter, at
whose Motions, airs; ’gainst such bodies when they
require, and yours, have what she seem’d to
be moving Pipe a Sugar-cane between
the scaffolds fall its kind disguised as birds.
100
Which was his Kitchen, tho his Brains were applied
unto all his wicked but in will,
till I but ashes proved thee still we respect
thee, as thick, might trace also the last
century. Mine eyes now dazl’d be; no wind,
no fair acceptance shines a ioy from man
that green seraglio has its eunuchs too,
as if a long drouth. What else—it is
perfectly the water will have it only
I Fawne on my lord’s estate, like showers
were only lightens in higher dames less
circumvented still expatiate freely,
as will alloted, soon floats into my
fate, no one piece is yet unheard; his Neck
was loaded with a goddesse plaine, and I
shall no more. Made Norman stone, unshaken.
101
As those hounds deign’d to stand by. Hill, ’ so lofty
that charity we owe but which things
beautiful, the fortune and Humane Laws.
First of wrongs his own: tis after two hundred
feet in height, not to say what we’re driving
the kind but in degrees all the Rabble
here and my own rage a monk remain’d,
while David, for he is not enough times
been Great, and nought to his name of Dulness,
be the well the low: for Shimei taught to
lisp the Right, if Sovereigns to accept
obliging all. But they pay. He said. To soothe
his Lips that rack for Nutriment did change
my state, and sit alike delight, light whispers,
in its song, and kings. Alas! Now just
tallied for a new one, inspiration!
#poetry#automatically generated text#Patrick Mooney#Markov chains#Markov chain length: 7#136 texts#Meredith sonnet sequence
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The Kickback
summary: What happens when your long-life crush's secret is discovered? In hopes of not wanting him to find out, what do you do... nothing.
pairing: dk x female reader
genre: fluff, slice of life, crack lol.
warnings: profanity
word count: 3k
a/n: today is my birthday and I wanted to share this one that has been in my drafts for so long. this campus life is stressful but I’m finding time to upload here and there. I hope you enjoy and have a great day/night. Much love from Babytaes! :) Also I really didn’t read this over sooo... if it doesn’t make sense. Take it up with corporation.
✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧
“Dear diary, I saw my crush today. I saw him in the living room after my brother invited him over with another friend. It's not as if I'm scared of him. I've spoken with him numerous times. I mean, I'm almost fluent in his language, lol. Seeing him and hearing his boisterous laugh was still entertaining. I'm wondering if he'll be at the kickback this weekend; if so, maybe I'll have the bravery to approach him. Okay, goodbye journal, love y/n.”
Your life consisted of short, insignificant interactions with him; however, when you had a crush, life was exciting and unpredictable. Since you're so near to him on a daily basis, your crush increased exponentially as you couldn't control your intrusive thoughts.
Yes, you did think of him, probably 25/8. It's not like you didn't know him, but you only knew the head version of him. And we all know they could be two different people. So the only thing left to do is keep it secret.
It's impossible for your secret to come out when you're the only one who knows about it. Right? Unfortunately, this isn't a movie, and your secret was revealed, and the perpetrator was none other than your arch-nemesis, Boo Seungkwan.
Okay, not quite that far, but you and him frequently collided because you and him could never agree on anything. He's just Boo, and he has his own behavior category.
He was the second-to-last person you wanted to find out about, after your crush, of course. From this point on, your life was not going as planned.
Your secret would never be revealed to Lee Seokmin, and you would do anything to protect it.
“What are you doing?” You leapt to your feet as you hurriedly closed your diary, terrified of prying eyes.
You rolled your eyes and stuffed your journal into a drawer with random papers, saying, "Shit, why don't you ever knock."
“Well, this is my shared dorm, and you're basically free living here,” he chuckled. You gave him a sidelong glance.
He was right.
“Is that a way you treat your twin? Is it now.”
He strolled away, completely oblivious to your yelling, and into the kitchen.
“Shut up, and get your ass out here we have to go shopping for the kickback. If you’re not out in 10 I’m leaving your ass.”
Great sibling love, what more could you ask for. As much as you know that this is the way he expresses his love, you still got up and started getting ready for the day despite his warning.
Amidst your constant disagreements with him, you still loved him. The only problem was that you had to keep your love interest hidden from him. You could see it now and the big brother trying to protect and all that annoying shit.
You were old enough to take care of yourself and you didn’t want unruly men to ruin something that you wanted for so long.
“Coming, if you leave me, I'll tell Mom.” And I think we can all agree that I am the favorite twin.” As he slammed the fridge door shut, you could hear his huge scoffs.
You hurriedly grabbed your purse and beanie as you dashed for the door, laughing at his tantrums. He had a habit of leaving you behind.
We will not speak of March 5, 2017.
“Hey, wait up,” you said as you ran to his car and jumped in before him, grabbing the aux before him.
He started the car and sped out of the dorm parking lot on his way to the store, saying, "You're such a pain in the ass."
“Oh, don't act as if you don't love me.”
“Whoever said I did must have lied to you. Mingyu laughed as he accelerated through Seoul's crowded streets.
The jokes, the laughter, and the love were all part of the experience of living with one of the biggest Kpop groups.
You wouldn’t have it any other way!
While listening to your playlist, the song "Come to You" perfectly complemented the mood.
You smiled as you passed many streets and watched the busy lives of many different people. You could say you had an imaginative mind.
We arrived at the store a long way down the road, grabbed one of the carts, and proceeded to a separate aisle of the store.
Buying stuff was always expensive with a party of 13 and more friends on the way. Almost everything had to be doubled, and the meat had to be tripled. When throwing a party, everyone is required to provide a dish.
You didn't seem to mind; after all, you weren't paying, so you just chilled on the cart while you watched Mingyu placed the goods in neatly.
You told Mingyu to grab a specific chip as you walked to the chip aisle, and he furrowed his brow.
“What are those? I've never seen them before.
"Dokyeom likes them," you blurted out without a second thought. As you mentally processed what you had said, you stared at him with wide eyes.
Shit.
“When they're not there, Dokyeom and Soonyoung get upset.” You shook your head and scooted by him, tossing two bags into the overflowing shopping cart.
“Oh-okay I guess you can get them.”
As you pushed the cart toward the cashier, you mentally slapped yourself in the face. You were certain that you would not crack.
The ride home was silent as the only noise was the continuous taps from Mingyu's fingers on the wheel.
Mingyu called wonwoo on his phone as he drove up to the dorm and asked him to help with the groceries.
As you heard Mingyu pout over the phone, he refused, and not even minutes after, wonwoo is strolling down the driveway on his way to the car.
“You shouldn't even have picked up I know I wouldn't" Wonwoo pushed your shoulder and chuckled at your humor. “I know”
“Heyyy I'm right here,” Mingyu began to sulk as he observed his sister speaking without him.
You and wonwoo both chuckled as you gathered your belongings and began walking away from Mingyu.
---
The days went by slowly as you reached the door. It was time to leave the house. You grabbed a jacket and purse. Today, the boys went to Hybe for a quick practice session before heading out for the weekend.
Because you are such a good friend and thoughtful person, you decided to buy them a few drinks as a gift. It wasn't anything special, you didn't want to see anyone, noo.
It took some time to order everything, especially with the large number of 13 items. Since you've known each other for most of your lives, the drinks on the list haven't changed. Ice Americanos and Frappes were the most popular drinks.
As soon as you arrived at the Hybe building, you swiftly grabbed the bag containing the drinks and proceeded to their floor. You finally made it to their practice room after thanking the employees for their assistance.
Slowly pushing the door open, you drew the attention of almost everyone as they turned to face you. As a number of them raced over to you and took the beverages from you, smiles crept across their faces.
As they sipped their drinks, the room was filled with thank yous and hellos.
The voice of an angel said, "Thanks again, y/n." He gave you a short smile before returning to his practice. Oblivious to people around you, words spilled out.
“Fuck, he's so attractive.”
“Whose good looking?” As you slowly turned around, you heard a voice speaking to you from behind you.
Fuck
It's Boo Seungkwan. He smiled at you as he grabbed a drink from your hand. He cocked his head as he sipped it, and his eyes widened.
“Don’t tell me you said dokyeom is good looking, no fucking way.”
As you coughed to relieve the high tension in the air, you started to mentally sweat.
“That's insane, I said the room was in good condition," you said as you slapped his shoulder and shook your head.
Come on, y/n, that didn't even make sense.
“You know you're not going to fool me, y/n?” Afraid that someone would find out, you dragged him into a back room and locked the door behind him
“Shit..shit..shit. If you tell anyone, I swear I'll -
Laughing, before raising his eyebrows after taking a sip of his americano, he cut you off.
"You're right, this is important information. But you already know that I'll keep my mouth shut about the situation. I don’t even know what we’re talking about right now.”
Seungkwan heard dokyeom announce that practice had resumed as the door opened. Before he left, he smiled at you and waved goodbye.
“Y/n and dokyeom in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G. As you were about to leap across the couch to silence him, he jumped up and ran out of the door laughing.
All of a sudden, your mind was filled with confusion and paranoia.
It became increasingly difficult to watch them practice as the session progressed. Your thoughts were not positive, and your attitude was slowly deteriorating.
Imagining the worst-case scenario. You paced in the back room when you heard a knock at the door. As you mentally prepared yourself, it caught you off guard. While walking side by side, Hansol and Seungkwan were whispering.
“Did they know?” You didn’t want anyone to find out so you ran, and didn’t stop running. To avoid society, you hurried out the door after saying a quick goodbye to the boys.
The goodbyes were not even heard as you hurried out of the Hybe parking lot without looking back. In a small group, information spreads quickly. And he was bound to find out.
Flushed and worried, you staggered into the dorm room. You knew your secret was going to get out eventually. In the case where Hansol and Seungkwan knew, Joshua is likely to know.
And since Joshua is close to the older boys, Seungcheol and Jeonghan know. The news would then spread to Hoshi, and then the entire performance team would be in the know.
The only remaining candidates are Mingyu and dk. If Mingyu finds out, it's game over for you at that point.
There was no point of living any more. Having completed a full loop of the house, you had come to your room for the final time. You slowly melted to the ground and fell out.
Dokyeon is more likely to know if Mingyu knows.
"What went wrong?" Unable to control yourself as you rolled around the floor, you erupted into a tantrum.
You sat up and shook your head, "I'll just have to leave the country," you said. "Man, you're so smart. Your plan y/n is fantastic."
You ran to your room, grabbed your suitcase from your closet, and began tossing things into.
No need to pack everything since you were only going to be gone for a year. As soon as your adrenaline slowed down, you began packing.
(A few hours later)
You were relieved when your clothes fit into your luggage when you had finally done packing. You were on your way now, and as long as it wasn't here, everything was good.
“Ah, I figured it out; now let's book it.”
When you approached the door, you unlocked it, and we were greeted with a pleasant surprise.
You walked up to the door and opened it, where you were greeted by Mingyu and his gang. Outside the door, you could see him, hao, dk, and wonwoo. They stared at you as they looked you up and down, perplexed as to why you appeared to be departing.
“Um, what is going on and where are you going?” Mingyu reacted with a rejoinder of his own.
Your throat felt as though it was clogging up, and you began sweating furiously under your armpits. Thank god for hoodies.
“Well, I was simply going to visit a friend's house,” you explained.
You knew he wouldn't believe you; he knew most of your friends, and they didn't live that far away for you to be carrying that much.
“First, that's a lie, and second, I need to speak with you, so your "buddy" will have to wait.” You sighed and closed your eyes.
Your escape had to wait.
Mingyu took your suitcase and slid it near the door, while the other members shuffled awkwardly into the room. While the other lads sat in the living room, Wonwoo went to his room.
“Maybe I could escape now?”
“What did you say y/n?” minghao said as he glanced at you.
You waved your hand in front of them and did a walk of shame to your room as you physically and mentally prepared yourself for whatever Mingyu had to say.
So much for your crush now.
Mingyu sat on the edge of your bed, arms crossed, staring at you.
“Sit down, he patted the bed on your side before lightly coughing.
"Some rumors have been going around, so I wanted to clear the air."
Seeing what he was about to say made your heart race, and you couldn't take it any longer. Does anyone else hear their loud banging, could Mingyu hear it?
You leapt to your feet and shouted at him before apologizing on your knees.
What a sight to see, a grown ass woman on her knees apologizing to her twin brother.
“I apologize; I should have told you first, but I was afraid you'd tell him. That's why I kept it a secret and plus dating a member of seventeen. That's dangerous enough-“.
Mingyu's "WHAT" cut you off.
You came to a halt as he got up, slowly staring up at him.
“Wait, weren't we discussing my crush on Dokyeom or something else?” Worries began to creep in as sweat began to accumulate on your brow.
“What the fuck, you have a crush on do-?” you exclaimed as you jumped to your feet and tackled Mingyu to the ground.
“Don't say it so loudly; he'll hear you.” As Mingyu began to pace around the room, as he pushed you off of him.
You could see his anger as he panicked, and his small rage tantrum was truly uncomfortable because he couldn't communicate his ideas to you because he was afraid of his companions' sensitive ears.
He pointed to the door and said, "Wait, so you do have a crush on him." You sighed, shaking your head.
As he walked away from you, he had another outburst.
Everything is now turning to shit, this was your only chance.
“I have to escape” you said as you dashed out the door and to your suitcase. Mingyu was standing behind you, staring at you in terror.
It wasn't in the plan for you to fall on him, but it was still nice. Focus y/n.
“I’m sorry, dokyeom; it was my fault. I didn't realize you were there. “Are you okay?” As you extended your hand to him, you pushed yourself off of him.
“Yeah, I'm OK, are you okay?” he asked. You've had quite a tumble.”
“Yeah I’m good, I live with a clumsily brother so I’m fine”
“Hey!"
You swiftly let go of each other and placed your hands behind your back as you became embarrassed.
“Hey, Seungcheol texted the group chat and said he wants to go out to eat. He said whoever can come.”
The boys instantly got ready as they wanted to eat, food is a great scapegoat. As you saw them exit the dorm, you took a step back and found your way back to your room.
“Is leaving still an option?” you murmured into your pillows, plopping your exhausted body on your bed and overthinking life.
---
You rolled over and looked at the clock, which reads 9:30 a.m.
You turned over in your bed, unable to yell, and trudged to the bathroom to make yourself presentable.
“What have you gotten yourself into, y/n?” You stripped off your clothing and stepped into the hot water after turning on the shower.
You didn't spend much time in the shower, but today you were engrossed in how your plan had devolved into this ordeal.
Resting your head on the tile as the hot water traced down your back, you contemplated on what the HELL you were going to do.
*BANG BANG*
“Y/n hurry up, we have to prepare.”
Hearing Mingyu's voice drew you back to reality as you turned off the water and got out of the shower, unlocking the door and letting him in.
“Hey, no snarky remark?” he said as he watched you walk to your room with your head down. You ignored him as you closed the door and prepared for the party.
It didn't take long for your calm disposition to be noticed, since you were the outspoken one. Even if you tried to fake it, it didn't work out.
You grinned as you walked through the background of Seungcheol and Jeonghan shared housing, looking at the celebration.
There were groups of people near the pool, at the grill, and even by the chairs, as you could see.
“Hey, bring the food inside; I'll take the meat to cheol,” mingyu said, shaking your head as you picked up the bags and headed to the kitchen, where you recognized some familiar faces.
“Y/nnnnnnnnn, heyyyyy, I’ve missed you.” When you saw her, you put the bags on the counter and hugged her, smiling into her embrace.
“It's great to see you again, yeji; how are you and the rest of the group doing?” Are the others here?” As she led you back outside, she interlaced your hands in hers.
You saw dokyeom and a few other people descend the steps before you left, as he waved and gave you a quick glance.
As you reach for a drink from the cooler, your heart begins to race. Something had to be turned off if you wanted to make it through the night, and this was the only way.
You took a sip and coughed loudly as you followed Yeji to the poolside.
It was going to be a long night for you.
---
As you and a group of individuals began to dance uncontrollably, the effects of the alcohol in your system began to show as you staggered to the grill.
“HeEeeyyYY, Wheeeere d'ya think yeeeeer goin’?” you slurred, jabbing a finger into seungcheol’s back
The other members laughed as they glanced at you, plainly detecting your intoxication.
“I forgot how drunk you can get, so why don't you take a break,” your overprotective brother says, making you scream within.
He always did this.
Gerroff me!” you said. “I’m ash sober ash ’m gonna git. And nuffink I - wait wait wait - nuffink you can do ‘boutit.” As you ambled back to the kitchen without so much as a hiccup in their direction, they laugh.
As you struggled to reach the door, you fell forward and were grabbed by a hand. As he lifted you from your imminent doom, his hold felt warm. With your eyes enlarged, you focused on the individual and stared at his face.
As you grabbed on to him, your words tumbled out of your mouth, “Ohmygoshimsosorry.” He drew you closer to him by taking your hands in his.
Saying your heart was racing was an understatement, it was literally pounding out of your chest. You were hand in hand with your crush, who you believed was exceptionally attractive and talented, and you wished he knew more about your sentiments or could somehow fill them.
But you know no huge idol like him would go for you. Feeling that made you sober up real fast as you felt your arm being pulled upstairs, you had no idea where you were going but it looked like someone's room.
Dokyeom eased open the door as he sat you on the bed and went to get some water from a little fridge. He handed it to you and sat next to you.
“Thanks”
“No problem, also I've been trying to talk to you all night but you appear to be occupied.”
As you took a sip of water, your heart began to beat faster; “waitttt, we donthavetotalk. Let’s dance! As he chuckled at your erratic movements, you began to wander around the room, pulling your hands into yours.
The alcohol was definitely making its way out of your system.
As he spun you around, his body in tune with the music, the bass of the song could still be heard. Even though this felt like a dream you didn’t quite care at the moment. Was it because you'd finally met the boy from your dreams, or was it because he wanted to meet you in person?
Your connection with him got stronger by the second, as did your heartbeat, which began to rise steadily with it. You couldn't keep stalling any longer; you needed to listen to what he was saying.
“I think I'm sober up for now,” you said as you let go of his hand.
Dokyeom chuckled before tossing his head back, “I didn't realize you could move like that” he said as they sat back on the bed, a little closer than before.
“I guess I learnt a few things along the way when you're friends with the best dancers out here.” As you finished your sentence, he peered into your eyes, making no sound as the room fell silent.
“Soo, what did you want to talk about?” you awkwardly state to relieve some tension in the air.
“I don't know how to explain it, but I kind of heard your "secret" as it passed through the practice room, and I simply wanted to be the first one to tell you about it because-
Your heart stopped pounding as your world came crashing down around you. You didn't want to hear it; the rejection; you'd rather live in your fantasy world, where you don't have to worry about anything. It wasn't true if you didn't hear it.
“Wait, if you can't reconcile those feelings, don't say anything; just let me go.” They're probably curious about our whereabouts anyway.” And with that, you stood up and walked towards the door, but you were pulled back by his hand.
He kissed you as swiftly as his hands linked with yours. You were taken aback at first by his passion, but you regained your calm and reminded yourself of what was going on: he was really kissing you, and you were really kissing him, and the rest of the world was inconsequential.
You were chilling on the outside while shouting for joy at the top of your lungs on the inside, as if your inner child had been set free. You had to be sure if this was a dream or if it was happening in real life.
“Ouch”
“Why did you do that?” Dokyeom asked as he gripped your arm in his.
“I had to double-check that I wasn't dreaming; this isn't the first time something like this has happened to me.”
“So you're saying I've been in your dreams?” he laughed as he cocked his head to the side and placed his hand in yours.”
You smacked your forehead and shook your head, realizing you couldn't get out of this one, and now he knew you fantasize about him. You didn't mind because the lad of your dreams was right in front of your eyes.
AND HE WAS HOLDING YOUR MF HAND. It was clear that your diary needed to be updated.
Stopping at the door, you placed your palm on his chest and worriedly stared at him.
“Wait, how did you find out?”
“Well, a tiny birdie was chattering loudly about it, his name rhymes with coo,” he said as he grabbed your hand in his and opened the door and began the walk downstairs.
“Fucking Boo Seungkwan”
#seventeen#svt#seventeen dokyeom#seventeen dk#seventeen lee seokmin#lee seokmin#seventeen fluff#dk fluff#seventeen crack#seventeen x female reader#seventeen imagines#seventeen scenarios#seventeen reactions#seventeen masterlist#babytaes works#much love from babytaes
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HOSAB SPOILERS
I've been looking into Norse mythology in connection with Crescent City, and I have a lot of thoughts... but today I want to start with Freya and Frey, how they seem to parallel Bryce and especially Ruhn, and what that might mean for these characters in CC3.
Some caveats: I'm by no means an expert on Norse mythology. I've read Norse Mythology by Neil Gaiman (which will be my primary reference here) and have verified that he hasn't changed the myths I'm referencing. In addition, SJM is clearly not doing a straight retelling of Norse mythology in Crescent City, so I will be using these myths to supplement what's already in the series.
Now onto our Vanir in question, by which I mean both Freya and Frey, as well as Bryce and Ruhn. First, yes, the Vanir name is the same. In the myths, the Vanir's powers tended to be connected to nature, and though this could tie into Rhys' claim in ACOSF that the Fae powers used to be more elemental and connected to nature (ACOSF, 443), this hasn't lined up with what we've seen of the Fae powers in Crescent City... though of course there could be reasons for that.
Getting back to the Norse of it all, these siblings were sent to live with the Aesir (the more war-like gods, who include Odin, Thor, and Loki -- and yes, the name sounds awfully similar to "Asteri," and yes, I want to talk about that in a future post, we'll get there) in Asgard after the Aesir-Vanir war concluded, as an act of good faith. They seem to live pretty peacefully, aside from the fact that Freya occasionally gets offered in marriage to candidates she deems undesirable and has to find clever ways to get out of these situations.
If you're already seeing the connections between Freya and Bryce, there are more: she wears the necklace of the Brisings , which comes up in nearly every mention of her, much like Bryce's Archesian amulet, and could also help explain where her name comes from. Perhaps especially in Gaiman's version, her personality is very Bryce-like. Consider this passage:
At this the gods all nodded and grunted and looked impressed. All of them except for Freya, and she looked angry. "You are fools," she said. "Especially you, Loki, because you think yourself clever." (Norse Mythology, 74)
Now, the parallel is by no means perfect, particularly because we know that Bryce is a central character and is very likely to be pivotal in the final battle in this series, whereas Freya tends to disappear when things get serious amongst the Norse gods, especially where Ragnarok is concerned.
However, I think it's possible that the intentionality behind this parallel is to point us towards the two brothers, Frey and Ruhn, who have some more intriguing parallels between them. I'm going to pull from Gaiman again:
Frey, the brother of Freya, was the mightiest of the Vanir. He was handsome and noble, a warrior and a lover, but he was missing something in his life, and he did not know what it was.
The mortals of Midgard revered Frey...but this did not fill the empty place inside him.
Frey took stock of his possessions:
He had a sword so powerful and remarkable that it fought by itself. But this did not satisfy Frey. (Norse Mythology, 201)
In the course of this myth, Frey gives up the sword in order to be with the beautiful woman he loves... which ends up causing him to lose his life in Ragnarok.
Of course, this is once again not a perfect parallel between Frey and Ruhn. Ruhn has the magical Starsword and is revered in Midgard (at least if you want to go by all those photos tourists like to take of him when he walks through Lunathion!), but he gives up that sword to Bryce, his sister, so that she will be protected. We are also shown throughout HOSAB that this kindness isn't something that his budding romance with Lidia brings out in him -- Ruhn offers the Starsword to Bryce from the beginning of HOSAB.
All that said, let's look at how Frey describes Gerd, the woman he falls in love with:
"I looked to the north. I saw a dwelling there, a splendid house. And I saw a woman walking up to the house. I have never seen a woman like her. Nobody who looks like her. Nobody who moves like her. As she raised her arms to unlock the door to her house, the light glanced off her arms, and it seemed to illuminate the air and to brighten the sea, and because she is in it, the whole world is a brighter and more beautiful place." (Norse Mythology, 206-207)
This is reminiscent of the way Ruhn describes Lidia:
Before he could ask Ithan mind-to-mind what he saw, Ruhn found himself faced with the most beautiful female he'd ever seen.
"Mind if I join?" Her voice was lovely, fair and cool -- yet no light shone in her amber eyes.
...But Ruhn peered up again at the beautiful female, whose face he knew well thanks to the news and TV, though he'd never seen it in person. Her golden hair glinted in the dim lights as she sat on his right and signaled the bartender with an elegant hand.
"I thought we'd play a round of cards," the Hind said. (HOSAB, 346-347)
Lidia and Gerd are described in the context of their beauty, their elegance in motion, their light, and their location (remember that Pangera is to the north of Valbara). Just as Frey gives up his sword for Gerd. Though he doesn't give up his sword for Lidia, Ruhn rushes into the Asteri's dungeons, focused only on saving Agent Daybright. Both are heedless of the cost, driven only by love.
This turns out badly for both of them. In Norse mythology, Frey's lack of a sword ends in his death in Ragnarok. In HOSAB, Ruhn is held prisoner by the Asteri, and his own options look pretty bleak. Remember, that, from the beginning, we've known the Oracle's prediction for this Starborn prince: "The royal bloodline shall end with you, prince" (HOEAB, 164). So it's certainly possible that SJM follows the parallel all the way through: that Ruhn, the Vanir brother, will die for lack of a sword.
However, we know that SJM loves her found families, love stories, and happy endings. And we know that there's one more book to close out the Crescent City saga. So what if Ruhn is Frey reimagined? What if in this story, the sacrifices Ruhn makes out of love are, ultimately, what saves him?
While I can't predict much about CC3 (though not for lack of trying!), I have my fingers crossed that Ruhn survives and gets the happy ending that eludes Frey.
#house of sky and breath#house of sky and breath spoilers#hosab#hosab spoilers#cc2#cc2 spoilers#crescent city#house of sky and breath theory#crescent city theory#norse mythology#ruhn danaan#ruhn danaan x lidia cervos#ruhnlidia#daynight#bryce quinlan#freya and frey
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trying to court you/winning you over w/ bakugou & shinsou!
genre: fluff, “delinquent”/“bad boy” au idk wtf it’s called
say it with me: long live intimidating hot bad boys that try to hard to win the affections of their soon-to-be s/o! LONG LIVE INTIMID-
is this me avoiding finishing my assignment rn, uhm mind ur business this is for me n me only
𝐁𝐀𝐊𝐔𝐆𝐎𝐔 𝐊𝐀𝐓𝐒𝐔𝐊𝐈
probably knows of your existence through a friend, most likely that friend winds up being ashido or kirishima.
when and if bakugou takes a liking to you—built off the brief encounters he’s had whenever you’d hang out with his group— it will be known cuz he won’t shut the fuck up about it.
“Oi, you. You said you’re meeting up with (Y/N) at the arcade tomorrow, right? Well, tell ‘em I said hi…”
bakugou’s always making his friends do his dirty work. asking them to throw in a good word or two about him whenever you’re around because he isn’t exactly the most approachable person to waltz up to.
and he knows that you know that. word flows pretty fast around town about how “intimidating” and “misbehaved” bakugou katsuki is.
are they wrong though? absolutely not! he’d just rather not have such labels tarnish his name. especially when he’s trying to get with you.
often whenever mina invites you to grab a bite with them to eat, bakugou always offers to pay for your food. and this detail doesn’t fly under his friends noses.
“Hey, what about me Bakugou? Pay for me too!”
“‘What about me Baku-’ Shut the fuck up Kaminari,” he’d curse, grumbling picking at his food, his cheeks now growing warm at the fact that he was being teased. “Not doing shit for you.”
at some point bakugou would grow tired of having to play broken telephone through his friends in order to get to you, so he’d be straight up and ask you for your number so you can keep in touch more.
would always invite you to hang out with him and him only whenever you’re not busy. whether it be when you finish studying, after work or late at night, bakugou always hits you up.
you’re kinda sketched the absolute fuck out when he brings you to a vacant parking spot at the top of some hill one night with his car.
“Chill out,” he’d say, tugging on your hand to pull you out from the passenger seat, “I just want to show you something. One of my favourite spots in this shit city.”
and to your surprise, bakugou’s brought you to this wondrous lookout spot that overlooks the entire bustling city of tokyo.
the streetlights, apartment buildings, cars, everything could be seen from a bird’s eye view from there.
PLEASE. the whole gesture is so oddly romantic you can’t help but to swoon because????
and the entire time while you’re admiring the view he’s just staring at you with this relaxed, gentle expression on his face— and isn’t being discreet about it whatsoever but hey, let him have it— because wow. YEAH <3
he’s whipped! an absolute fool in love! you’ve got him in your grasp hook, line, and sinker
from that point onward, you’ve grown to be more open and relaxed with bakugou to which he was riddled with pride about because fuck yeah, he did that, all on his own. mhm.
a few months down along the line when you bring the topic up about relationships and dating to bakugou, he’d squint at you, his eyebrows contorted with pure confusion at your question.
“what do you mean, ‘who am i dating?’ thought we made it obvious? i don’t go spending my time or lending my shit to just anybody, you know.”
he might as well be with the countless times he’s labelled you as his whenever other guys would try to get at you.
or how he’d defend your name at the drop of a hat if anyone were to be badmouthing you behind your back.
so yes, he successfully will/has earned his way up to being the number one candidate for being your boyfriend
𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐒𝐎𝐔 𝐇𝐈𝐓𝐎𝐒𝐇𝐈
shinsou probably has mutuals in relation to you and would probably need to see you a few times to actually gain interest in you just like bakugou.
if he were to ever catch feelings for you all his friends would know, but you wouldn’t.
verbally, he’s silent about it and doesn’t really discuss such things which makes it difficult for you to decipher how he’s feeling.
but since shinsou’s friends have known him for so long, they pick up on his physical cues. and man, are they hard to miss.
like how the corner of his lips would slowly curl into a smile whenever he sees that his friends would successfully manage to bring you to their outings.
or how he visibly perks up and is all ears whenever your name is dropped
“Oh, you guys are talking about (Y/N), right? Yeah… yeah, they’re nice…”
he’s not discreet about it whatsoever.
has a bit of a record as being known as a player, so he tries to beat away such accusations about how “those didn’t count as real relationships”.
tries to downplay his past flings in hopes that you wouldn’t see him as some kind of fuckboy or whatever. because he swears up and down that he’s not, for you alone that is. everyone else? yeah, good luck <3
shinsou really likes you and tries to see you any chance that he can get.
he’s willing to pass up his time trespassing, skipping classes, and hanging at the skate park with his friends if that means he could see your pretty face.
hell, one day you’d even walk in on the sight of shinsou in your academy’s learning commons.
however, thing is, this mfer doesn’t even go to your school, let alone goes to one in your district.
but there he is, sitting in the library along with his rowdy ass friends fucking around over god knows what.
and the moment he sees you walk in? good-fucking-bye friends <3 he immediately joins you at your secluded table, worming his way into your study time so he could chat it up with you
“You go here? Didn’t even know, small world, huh.”
“Very funny Shinsou.”
honestly he’s such a cutie with his advancements towards you that you’re willing to give him a chance, just to test the waters and see how things go.
#bakugou x reader#shinsou x reader#bakugou katsuki x reader#shinsou hitoshi x reader#bnha imagine#bnha headcanons#bakugou katsuki#shinsou hitoshi
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illicit affairs
pairing: sheriff lee bodecker x younger! reader
warnings: smut (18+), cheating, age gap
a/n: i love perfumes which smell of daisies so i made the reader use something like that. i do imagine her going for a very much female appearance and aura despite her personality and i can see lee fancying that sort of fragile femininity look paired with her independency. this song is based of illicit affairs from taylor swift but i was also listening to all too well at some points so i think some of that passed onto the writing. hope you enjoy xx
> DRESS
Leave the perfume on the self that you picked up just for him so you leave no trace behind like you don’t even exist. Take the words for what they are a dwindling, mercurial high, a drug that only worked the first few hundred times ... And you wanna scream don’t call me “kid”, don’t call me “baby”, look at this idiotic fool that you made me. You taught me a secret language I can't speak with anyone else. And you know damn well for you I would ruin myself a million little times ...
The snow settled onto the ground, a view she could see from her white window. Sprawled against her window pane, the blue soft fabric of her dress cascaded down her body as she watched the snow fall and become one with the mass of white covering the once green grass of her home. Her feet dangled in anticipation, hair cascading into hairdresser set curls, held away from her face with a pearl barrette. Her fingers dangled across her collarbones, feeling the cold matching pearls which unlike her barrette clip, had been offered to her by Lee on thanksgiving. “A pretty girl like you deserves her own pearls” his voice echoed in her mind whenever her feeling felt the smooth irregular circle shapes of the pearls laying against her collarbones. There was nothing more than she wanted than to wear those pearls to the police winter ball, to show up wearing something he had bought for her with what money he gathered from his fickle Captain position, but she couldn’t. Everyone knew what she had, what jewellery she had, it was all valued at the insurance centre downtown and the pearl necklace definitely wasn’t. Her own pearls rested inside her ivory jewellery box along with the ribbon she was wearing around her waist when she first kissed him, and the comb that held her hair in place whenever she met him during windy nights.
Her grandmother had left before her, leaving with the grocery shop owner as her date for the ball but she had stayed behind. She had told her she’d rather go alone, blaming her loneliness on the fact all the boys her age were either engaged thus going with their wives and the single ones not wanting to do with her. Of course that was further from the truth and as she watched the snow fall, she imagined Lee’s cruiser driving through the snow, stopping in front of her home and knocking on her door to take her. But those were nothing but impossible scenarios created from the deepest part of her psyche. Looking over her shoulder, the clock on her bedside table shone 9PM into bold red letters. She should get going before her grandmother got worried. Her eyes lingered across her beauty parlour to the silver platter with her perfume, the one she’d picked just for him after hearing how much he loved the smell of daisies. She had to leave it, she couldn’t put any perfume on, she couldn’t take her pearls, she doesn’t exist. At least, she as Lee’s lover does not exist for all that everyone could know and nothing hurt more than the sound of her pearls returning to her ivory box. It was were they belonged, away from everyone, hidden, a mysterious sin secret.
With her white fur wrapped around her arms, she entered her glossy yet dull red car, pulling the hood up despite the weather. She wanted to feel the cold, she wanted that numbness to hide what she had been feeling for the last months. It was all so exhilarating when it began; the summer walks, laying in the middle of the forest in an old towel as he feed her ripe strawberries, escaping from her grandmother’s house at night and meeting him up under the apple tree in light dresses. However, at time wind down, she started to crave the rest of a relationship, the holding of hands. Instead what she got was clandestine meetings in parking lots, behind the bars or in the middle of the forest when no one could see them. She constantly told herself it was going to eventually be her turn, he was gonna leave Jane for her. Yet, she seemed to constantly fall on the same error every mistress before her did, the mistake of forgetting her place. Stopping in front of the old town hall where the ball was being held, she could see the soft lights, hear the laughter and it made her sick. She didn’t want to go in, she didn’t want to see those happy couples but she had too. She had to put up a show, be the little pedestal trouble starter woman she was expected to be and so she would.
Stepping into the hall, her eyes immediately found Lee in the corner speaking with the Sheriff, arm draped over Jane’s shoulder while the other hand held a clear cup probably with his favourite drink. Her heart sunk to the same place it always did as she got lost in the dance floor. She knew everyone in this town hall, from the first boy she ever kissed Jonah and his third wife Elizabeth to Billy whom had been prom king with her. There was nothing new anymore and what once felt new and true was now anchoring her inside a fishbowl of images of her own mistakes and unfulfilled life needs.
- Hey, Y/N. - Billy called out for her attention. She held onto the fur wrapped around her for comfort as she prepared her facade of a happy girl at a happy party. - Your grandma told me you ain’t gotta a partner for tonight. Could’ve told me, I would’ve taken you.
- It’s ok, ain’t like I need a man. - she replied, almost angrily although he deserved no anger from her. - What’s the stage for? We’re getting a band tonight?
- No, the new sheriff candidates announcing themselves tonight. Prepare for the blood bath.
- Sounds interesting. - she spoke out, her voice getting mumbled out as the mic’s sound hurt her and everyone else’s ear. The police chief stood there in his best attire, holding a small piece of papers, his fat thumbs hitting the mic to gather everyone’s attention. He already had their attention merely by wearing a cowboy’s hat with a formal suit.
- Now folks, we all now how much we gonna miss our good old Sheriff but it’s time to elect a new one. - his southern accent was pronounced, too pronounced, cartoonish even. Y/N remembered laughing as a child when she first heard him speak only to immediately shut up when her grandmother looked her way with a look which left room for no questions. She herself had barely developed an accent, her grandmother still very keen on instilling in her the education she herself had gotten. However, the longer she spent with Lee, the more it would sometimes slip; one or two words, nothing major. - Of course, Leroy is running again.
- I don’t know why he tries. - Y/N whispered to Billy, concealed laughing smile behind her hand.
- You gotta admit it’s a good thing to imagine. Damned Leroy and his prostitutes running the town? We’d be forgotten by God.
- We’re already forgotten by God. We were banished from the garden of Eden, don’t you remember? - she teased, always enjoying to toy around with the religion Knockemstiff was so hang up on. - We’re probably direct descendants.
- You ought to keep that mouth shut if you don’t wanna get in trouble. - he warned yet it went through deaf ears. Y/N liked stirring it, specially when it came to things which were so analytically flawed.
The regular list of candidates continued to go from officers to common folk who all believed they could make the town better. At least that was all they said they wanted to get some votes but at the end of the day, they just wanted to control the town with an iron fist. Do what they wanted without anyone question it. She couldn’t blame it, humans are hardwired to go crazy for power and let it consume them so she just let it pass. She knew all the candidates, they were always the same. Leroy, Matthew, Edwards ... all the common ones, she even wondered why they kept announcing it. Those three competing for the sheriff position was as certain as the sun coming up each morning.
- The last candidate is our cap’tain Bodecker. - her head snapped to the stage as every sound seemed to dim until she was surrounded by pure silence. All she could hear was the buzz from her ears as she watched him climb up the stairs to the stage, shaking the chief’s hands.
Everything seemed to be stuck in slow motion yet her mind was running faster than a shot bullet. The clapping was slow, everything was silent yet she could see their hands slowly clap and their lips moving in whispers. Her eyes roamed the crowd finding Jane right in front of the stage, looking up at him with adoration at the possible place she could possible hold; the sheriff’s wife. The slow motion ended with a loud crash and suddenly everything seemed just too fast. She ignored Billy’s pleas for her attention and moved straight to the small plastic tables covered in burgundy towels to make it look fancier where all the drinks and food were being held. One of her only friends from high school Mary was the one in charge, happily serving food and drinks to anyone who asked.
- Hi Y/N. - she always looked like the perfect housewife and that was always what she wanted to be. Beautiful, bountiful blonde hair with a few flowers matching her pink dress. Despite it all, she was always nice to her even with their different life goals.
- Hey Mary. How’s Paul? I heard from rumours you two had quite a nice honeymoon. St.Louis, right?
- Yes. He booked us a nice honeymoon suite, it had flowers and those heart shaped beds and chocolates. It was real nice, I’m hoping to be pregnant soon. What about you? Your grandmother said you came alone. You could’ve told me, my brother would’ve taken you.
- That’s alright, Mary. I don’t intend to stay for long ... Uhm, can I have a drink?
- Of course. Sidecar, as per usual?
- I think I’ll just have a double cognac, please. Or maybe some gin ... whatever can make me dizzy the fastest.
- Everything, okay?
- Just need to forget some stuff, it’ll be okay. - she forced a smile. At least half that phrase was true. Mary served her up with her best gin and she returned to the dance floor, trying to blend with the rest of the attendees, however her baby blue dress was much too different from anything else in town.
Y/N thought she’d be best outside where no one could see her and so she left, avoiding Billy who kept asking for her. She leaned against the old wood of the town hall, mascara running down her cheeks, and gin glass on the other one. She looked like the perfect warning tale of why you should not mess her married men. She knew better, she knew so much better but she still did it, like the idiotic little fool she seemed to be. Y/N sighed, the air condensing in the air as she drank from the glass.
- Pull yourself together, Y/N. - she looked to see side, her grandmother standing outside with the look she used to give her when Y/N embarrassed her as a little girl. - What did you expect?
- I’m just not having a good day, nana.
- You’re hanging around with Captain Bodecker that’s what you’re doing.
- What?
- Don’t play innocent with me, Y/N. You’re just like your mother and I’ve raised your mother so I’d know. I saw you leave in his car last week. Do you want to defend yourself?
- Is it even worth it? - she took a sip out of her drink. - What do you want me to say?
- I want you to pull yourself together and go inside. You better have this finished off before those elections start. I will not have my granddaughter be a home wrecker.
Y/N ignored it. There was nothing her grandmother could say that hurt more than what she was already feeling. She watched the snow fall from the cover of the banner covering the town hall, cold and icy yet somehow warmer than her. The drink didn’t last forever and although it was much stronger than what she was used to, she didn’t feel the slightest bit dizzy. It was if the universe was punishing her for her choices. She shook her head, leaving the glass onto one of the windows. She’d be better off at home and she’d already made her appearance. If someone asked where she was, she could’ve blamed it on their drunkness. Opening her little clutch, she started fishing for her keys through a sea of change, makeup and receipts.
- You better not be thinking of driving after you just drank. - she turned her head to see Lee with his hands on his waist, playfully smiling at her. His smile faded as he noticed the streaks of mascara from her eyes to her jaw. - Did that shithead Billy say something?
- No ... Lee, I wanna go home okay. - she sighed. - Can you just pretend you didn’t see me drink?
- I was hoping we could spend the night together. Rent a hotel room outside town. A real nice place, with a pool and some room service. My treat of course.
- I ... We can’t, Lee. Your wife is inside as she’s gonna notice you’re not there and you’re not home.
- She’s going home early. Jane’s been taking a few sleeping pills. She’s down for the night, won’t even notice. - he took a few steps closer to her, knowing everyone was too drunk to even remember. - I was waiting for you to come greet me, congratulate me. I can’t believe my girl wanted to leave before showing me how pretty she looked.
- You didn’t tell me you were running for Sheriff. - he cupped her face, thumb caressing her cheek. - You said it was a silly position.
- Yeah but ... it’s a Sheriff. I could become Mayor, ya know. The old sheriff thinks I’d be good for it. - he scratched the back of his neck, something he always did whenever he was nervous or was confronted by something he did not expect. Y/N had learned to read him and knew him better than her own favourite books. - C’mon, kid. It’s a night worth celebrating, don’t you think?
- Don’t call me kid. - she shot her head his way, his word hitting a particular hurt spot which she didn’t realise she had.
- Hey, I’m not trying to mock ya. - he rose his hands. - What’s wrong, huh baby? Hm? Tell me sugar, I hate it when you’re upset. Besides, if it was that Billy kid I’ve been wanting to give him a good beating.
- Don’t call me baby, either. - she sighed, throwing her purse inside the car, before turning to him. - Billy didn’t do anything I’m just ... tired.
- I’ll drive you home, then.
- I don’t wanna go home either. - she pushed her hair from her forehead, looking at the ground. The snow engulfed her feet and her shoes, yet it might as well have engulfed her entire being. Lee noticed her lip trembling and how her free hand was trying to stop tears from falling down. He looked behind him, the town hall door shut, before taking his jacket off, draping it over her shoulders, and opening the car door for her.
Y/N daren’t look him in the eye, instead sitting in the passenger seat as he pushed the hood of her car up. After all, most people did not enjoy driving in the snow with the hood up. She didn’t know where he was taking her and for all it mattered she didn’t want to know. If he was driving her to her killing location, it sounded much better than having to work out through the bubbling feelings in her tummy. Y/N didn’t even noticed how much she was crying until the tears started streaming so fast they were falling onto the palms of her hands like diamond daggers. She leaned her head against his shoulder, watching the road ahead through the blurry orbs of her own eyes, trying to find some warmth through him. The drive seemed endless and her mind rushed in an even more endless way as she considered all her choices til now. She found it unbearable how not guilty she didn’t feel about it. She could still remember the feeling of the cold water against her body and his lips against hers, being tangled in his bed sheets while he drank a beer, his grunts as he thrusted into her inside his patrol car. She remembered every detail either it being lust or romantic but most importantly she remembered how he looked at her. It was almost as through rose coloured glasses, most of the times agreeing with her pessimist view of the town she was in. Lee looked down on her, watching her perfect hair break through the gelled curls she had set down. He never liked the polished look anyway, he loved to see her walk in her white dresses and freshly washed hair flowing with the wind. This woman sat next to him was gorgeous but he preferred his Y/N, he preferred the woman who would poke fun of casualty and rush into the woods with her nightgown. This woman next to him was pretty yes but she seemed tainted by a sadness he could see yet couldn’t help. He didn’t want his Y/N to be the slightest bit sad. She did not deserve it. She was too pure, too young to be consumed by the loneliness, darkness and sadness that came with being an adult. Yet again, he had to start learning the young woman she was wouldn’t stay young forever. He wanted to know how to help. he wanted to be the man who wakes up next to her on summer mornings and winter evenings but life is not how we plan it out to be.
She watched the snow fall from her window as “You are my sunshine” played on the background from her radio. Looking up to him, his eyes were glued to the road, the sign of leaving Knockemstiff way past them and the hotel on the horizon. She called it the Heartbreak hotel, with its red walls and luxurious nature. A more fancy place for those who wanted to give a better night to their mistresses but that was not why she called it the heartbreak hotel. It was due to the fact she ended up crying every time she or he left. While inside those walls, she could pretend they were Mr. and Mrs. Bodecker, young couple moved out of Knockemstiff on a romantic getaway yet she wasn’t Mrs. Bodecker, Jane was. She had seen who the future sheriff’s wife was and it was not and it would never be her. He stopped the car in the parking lot, looking at her who was lost in thought, leaned against his shoulder.
- Come on, sugar. What is it? - Lee kissed the top of her head. - The heck happened in that Town Hall?
- Just being silly, Lee. - she shook her head, faking a smile. - Just don’t like parties one bit.
- I hate ‘em too, sugar. All show no action. Besides no party is a party without my baby. - he hooked his ring finger under her chin, softly pulling it up. She tried not to look at the moonlight illuminating the silver band around his finger, a symbol he belonged to someone else and she knew it. She had seen the wedding photo on his secretary, a much younger Lee with a much younger Jane with the facade of a happy marriage. Thinking about it always made her sick and ever since seeing that picture she couldn’t bring herself to do so. - Come on, let’s get you a bubble bath, yeah?
She followed him into the hotel almost in a zombie like state until the reception. The talk was a dance she had danced before, it was all the same. Lee would present money in cash so it wouldn’t show up on his credit card statement. He would sign in with a fake address but with his own name and no one would question it. After all, the staff wanted money, they didn’t care if it was an illicit affair or not. To be honest, she didn’t care much anymore.
- Mrs. Bodecker? Mrs. Bodecker? - the receptionist called out to her but it didn’t even register until she was looking her into the eyes. Mrs. Bodecker, she was definitely not. - Would you like a complementary tea? You look cold.
- No, it’s okay. - she smiled while Lee grabbed the keys. His hand wrapped itself around hers, leading her over to the elevator.
God, she wanted him. She really did, he thought to himself. It was an unbelievable feeling to have someone who loved him back, someone who always had encouraging words to tell him, someone who would stay after a fight. He thought and imagine what it would’ve been like if she was born earlier, god he would’ve courted her and would’ve married her the second they were out of high school. Sadly, the woman he loved was born 10 years after and he met her when he was married. He led her to the 13th hotel room and closed the door behind them.
- Things are gonna be different when I’m sheriff. No more sneaking around, no one will dare say a word. I can move to Brewer Heights, heck, I can buy two houses, one just for you and me.
- Lee ...
- Where are your pearls, sugar? You know I love to see you with them, makes you look so pretty.
- You know I can’t wear them in public, Lee. I am not your ... - she shouldn’t say that, she should not let those words out. - They’re not insured under my name, people would comment about it.
- You worry too much. - he pushed the fur that covered her arms down, placing a small kiss on her elbow. - My little over-thinker.
- One of us has too, Captain Bodecker.
- How about some champagne? - he pointed towards the champagne bottle in the ice bucket by the dresser before walking towards it, raising it so he could inspect the brand. He longed for the finest things in life, no longer wanting to be that middle to low class man he’d been forced to be. Being Sheriff, Mayor someday was going to be really something, it’d be his chance.
- I’m not 21 yet, Captain.
- Only a month til you are, kid. - he filled two long crystal flutes, handing it over to them. - By then I should stop calling you kid, huh?
- You shouldn’t call me kid, now. - she took a sip of the golden liquid, hoping it would take away her jealousy. Lee hummed, leaned over to kiss the crock of her neck, climbing up to her jaw in a move that was sure to leave marks. It was okay for him to leave marks on her, she was unmarried, young but on him? Sometimes she wanted to, sometimes she wanted to mark his pale plump skin as a possession, one that screamed Jane might have the wedding ring but she had the man. Yet, she couldn’t. - You look so handsome tonight.
- You’re my worse critic. - he smirked, placing his glass on the bedside table before pulling her chin towards him, placing a soft kiss on her plump, painted lips. - God, you can’t even imagine how fucking hard I got when you walked in.
- Such gentle behaviour. - she teased, fingers lightly tracing the skin of his face. He moaned, leaning in to kiss her again. - I wore it just for you. Blue. I knw you like it.
- You’re always such a good girl for me. - he started to remove his jacket, pushing on her chest lightly so she laid against the luxurious bed.
The alcohol sure did a better job than her about making her forget what she was doing it. The alcohol and his kiss, his touch on her skin made her forget the clench in her heart when she saw Jane Bodecker clap once they said his name. It made her forget she couldn’t hear perfume around him unless he showered, it made her forget. Both of her moaned through the kiss, seemingly unconcerned with the fact that it was a sin. Maybe that’s why it taste so sweet, the sin, the thrill. None of them cared really and all he wanted to do now was hold her, touch her, look at her.
- You are so beautiful. - he spoke, more to himself than to her specifically, leaning down on the bed as he spread her legs, taking his place in between them which was so familiar to him. Lee ran his knuckles through the middle of her folds, cold hands making her shiver. - Ev’ry darn day I wake up and I think, I got myself the most beautiful woman in the world.
Her eyes were glued to the ceiling, the white paint of it engulfing her as his hands caressed her thighs. All she could feel were his cold hands massaging the skin of her thighs, spreading them apart and giving him full access to her. His lips attacked her core, always chapped which made her feel so good, it made her know it was him giving her that pleasure. She moaned out loud as he dwelled in like a starved man, her head relaxing against the pillow. There was never any mercy with him, he teased her like he owned her, focusing on her clit while licking her folds. He had her exactly where he wanted her - starving for him.
- You’re gonna see. - he mumbled out while he relentlessly ate her out. - When I’m sheriff there will be no more hidin’. No one gonna dare say anythin’ about it.
- Lee, please ... no foreplay. - she whined, begged even as he stopped his motions. His eyes curiously searched for hers, hands pulling his body up as he stood on top of her. - I just want to feel you.
- Weren’t you feelin’ me, sugar?
- You know what I mean, Lee. - she wrapped her hands around his neck, head cocked to the side. - I don’t want any foreplay today.
- Oh sugar ... - he chuckled leaning down to kiss her collarbone. - You’re just a cock slut for me, aren’t ya? Can’t just wait for me to treat ya right ain’t it, baby?
- Lee, please. - she whined, hands wavering over his police issued chunky belt. Lee smirked, holding her hand before she could do anything. Y/N pouted, head leaning against her shoulder. - C’mon.
- But baby, you look so pretty when you’re begging. - he returned to kiss her neck, leaving marks which were sure to become hickeys tomorrow but she didn’t care. No one was going to see it. - I was expecting you to come congratulate me in the way you always do, maybe in the back of the town hall. Hoping someone would catch us so they’d see you’re my girl.
- Lee ... - she whined as he kept kissing her neck and collarbones. - Please.
- Tell me what you want, baby. You know I do everything you want. - he rose from her neck, toothy grin as he leaned down to kiss her plump, pink painted lips. - Tell me you want my big fat cock. I know you do, baby. Tell me how much you need it.
- Lee ... please, need you.
- You have me, baby, tell me what you need. Tell me what you want. - his knuckles ran through the middle of her folds again. - You’re so wet, baby. Just tell me what you want, c’mon
- Lee ... please. - she looked at him with those wide eyes that could get someone to commit murder for her, as he pushed down his trousers. - I want you to fuck me with your ... big fat cock, Capitain.
- Oh, baby ... - he leaned his forehead against hers as he pushed his cock past her entrance, eyes shut tight as he tried to keep himself sane at the mere feeling of her walls contracting against him. His lips found hers as he shed himself fully into her. Her hand searched for his, as Lee slowly rolled his hips against hers, basking in the mere high that was being inside of her. - You okay, baby?
- Yeah. ... fuck, move. - she whined as he removed himself from her and pushed back in, slowly starting to rock into her as he always did. The little tease. Her hand clenched his as he speed up his thrusts, lips returning to hers in a messy, moaned filled kiss. All she could hear was the sound of skin against skin and interrupted breathing. - Lee, fuck.
- I know, baby. - he laughed, returning to kiss her the way he liked as her walls started to clench more forcefully against his member, milking him for all he was worth. His free hand grabbed her hip as he further sped up against her, bruising her skin as his breaths got more raggedy. He bite onto her neck as he felt his control over his own orgasm disappear.
- Lee, fuck! - she moaned, almost raising off the bed as her own orgasm washed over her. Her head fell against the pillow, sluggish as he continued to thrust into her until ropes and ropes of cum painted her walls. He chuckled mid grunt, holding her against him as he turned around in bed.
- You all fucked up, aren’t ya, sugar? - he kissed the top of her head. - You’re gonna see, sugar. Things are gonna be so much better.
- Right ... - she cuddled against his chest. - Hm ... Lee can you drive me back home early on?
- Early shift?
- Yeah.
- Okay, sugar.
The morning was a harsh breaker of dreamy hazes and just like that she was back to the place where she always was, in her home, surrounded by the scent of the perfume she had bought just for him. She sat on her dress, taking the necklace he had given her from the little mother of pearl seashell shaped box and holding them against her chest. She loved him, she really did. Some people had their downfalls and hers was painted onto her neck and held by her hands. He was her downfall.
The sun was high up on the snowy midday in Knockemstiff and once again Lee had been resigned to desk duty after the Sheriff not taking it too lightly he decided to run without his permission. Normally he would’ve been upset but he knew, he knew he was close to winning and then he could throw away those stupid hotels and just get her a little house close to him. God, he couldn’t fucking wait.
- Captain Bodecker, someone here for you. - his secretary knocked on his door. - Mary Gillies, sir.
- Mary Gillies? - he knew her to be a friend of Y/N’s, perhaps her only friend other than that punk Billy. - Send her in.
- Good afternoon, captain. - she said as she walked into his office. - I’m so sorry to be bothering but Y/N ...
- Is she alright? - he interrupted her.
- Yes, well ... - she rummaged through her bag to find a cushioned envelope with his name on it. - She told me to give you this.
- What is it?
- I don’t know, captain. I must get going, my husband is waiting for me.
- Of course. Thank you, Mrs. Gillies.
He waited for the woman to be out of his office and for the door to be shut for him to open the envelope. The minute he opened the envelope, pearls fell into his desk, the same pearls he had given Y/N followed by a small note in the dusty pink stationary that normally laid on her dresser. Turning it around, he saw the words he’d been dreading to read or hear ever since he met her. I’m sorry, Lee. He threw the letter on his desk before getting up from his desk as fast as he could, ignoring the calls from his colleagues as he got into his cruiser. Damned, Brewer Heights, why couldn’t it be closer?
He approached her home fast and closed the door as fastly as he ran up to the door. Her hag of a grandmother was possibly at church and he had learned where they kept the spare key; behind a violet pot. His heart was beating as fast as a deer on a hunt as he climbed up the stairs and found the once filled room was empty, with only a perfume bottle on her empty dresser. He observed the whole room as if he were in a nightmare, sitting on her bed as he clenched the pearls he had given her not so long ago, the smell of daisies in the air as some song played on the still turned on radio.
You never know dear how much I love you. Please don’t take my sunshine away ...
taglist: @lookiamtrying
#sebastian stan#sebastian stan/you#sebastian stan/reader#sebastian stan/y/n#sebastian stan x reader#sebastian stan x you#sebastian stan x y/n#sebastian stan imagine#sebastian stan smut#sheriff lee bodecker#sheriff lee bodecker x reader#sheriff lee bodecker x you#sheriff lee bodecker x y/n#sheriff lee bodecker/reader#sheriff lee bodecker/you#sheriff lee bodecker/y/n#sheriff lee bodecker smut#sheriff lee bodecker imagine#lee bodecker#lee bodecker x reader#lee bodecker x you#lee bodecker x y/n#lee bodecker/reader#lee bodecker smut#lee bodecker imagine#lee bodecker/y/n#lee bodecker/yoou
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can’t stand to see you lonely: part 3
a/n: we love a little throwback with this gif, my heart 😭 again, i can’t thank you all enough for the love you’ve shown my writing it’s truly the sweetest thing and i’m happy you guys are liking the story so far! this was is the longest part so far with a lot happening, so happy reading! remember to leave some feedback and reblog cause it’s always appreciated.
and as always, thanks to the lovely jess @arrogantstyles and jill @havethetimeofyourstyles for beta reading ❤️
word count: 19k
warnings: mentions of a partner cheating (f*** mark), minor mention of drugs (aka weed lol), alcohol consumption (tequila anyone?), and serious! sexual! tense!
fic page // let’s chat // cstsyl playlist
Y/N didn’t realize she had left Harry’s apartment the other day with his hoodie on until the next morning when she had woken up to the sweet smell of faint lavender and laundry soap. She didn’t return the hoodie, though. In fact, she shamelessly slept in the hoodie for three more nights; it was just really comfortable, she tries to convince herself that’s the only reason she’s wearing it to bed each night. It wasn’t because the smell that calmed her, reminding her of that dimpled smile and dazzling green eyes that would wander into her dreams every night now and then. And it was especially not because she found herself falling for those same pair of eyes, no, not a shred of feelings besides friendship there.
“You’re not fooling anyone,” Sammy deadpans.
“What are you talking about now?” Y/N questions, keeping her eyes on her phone as she texts back Harry.
“You and your little affair,” Sammy quips back. His choice of words causes Y/N’s head to quickly snap up and look at her friend. He’s giving her a bored look, a smug little smile on his face that makes Y/N narrow her eyes.
“I am not having an affair, Sammy, so let’s not start that rumour around the office, please,” Y/N says to him in a hushed voice. “Plus, Mark hasn’t bothered to call or text me in almost a week now. So, I’m pretty sure the next time we do talk it will be to end things officially,” Y/N explains, her voice falling flat as she feels her heart rate pick up just thinking of her and Mark breaking up. Regardless of the fact he’s hurt her feelings, annoyed her and so on - it’s still a break up, and they really freaking suck.
“I sure hope so,” Sammy says. “You know I’m team Harry all the way,” he gives Y/N a wicked smile which she only rolls her eyes at.
There were no teams to be on, she thinks. She was just becoming friends with Harry, and yeah, she found him ridiculously attractive and really sweet too, but she wasn’t dumping Mark for him or anything. If she was dumping Mark it was because of how their relationship turned out, without Harry’s help, and how neither of them are benefitting from being together anymore. Hell, they didn’t even have sex last time he was in the city. It also didn’t have to do with the fact that Y/N would be nervous that Harry could hear them. Nope that thought didn’t cross her mind not even once - Y/N finds herself biting on her bottom lip as she’s deep in thought and trying to convince herself certain things.
Her phone buzzes where she left it on her desk brings her back to reality. She picks it up and swipes up as the face ID recognizes her, opening up the messages, between her and Harry, that she was previously on. Y/N can’t help it as a chuckle leaves her lips. She notices how Sammy leans back in his chair and raises a brow at her, but she chooses to ignore him and instead keeps watching the gif Harry sent on loop over and over again.
It was a cartoon Santa, dabbing. Yes, Harry used a gif that had to do with a trend from the world's youth. Y/N never would have guessed Harry even knew what dabbing was. She holds back another chuckle and looks up a gif to respond to his. She goes for one that’s a cartoon of Rudolph, his nose lighting up like a strobe light as he dances on two legs. It’s silly, but she’s enjoying this back and forth texting of stupid Christmas themed gifs. It’s been going on for about five minutes and she doesn’t even know why or how it started, but she loves it.
How’s work so far today? Harry texts after sending a gif of the Olaf the snowman from Frozen, dancing in the field of flowers. Y/N tilts her head to the side and leans further back in her seat, stretching her legs under her desk. The work that was on her desk was long forgotten when her and Harry began texting earlier.
It’s good, I finally have a few moments of downtime at my desk. We had like four clients in this morning for some fittings for the many Christmas parties going on next week. Y/N sends that off before typing, How’s your day? Write anything good yet?
Glad it’s less busy now, don’t let me distract you with all these amazing Christmas gifs though. And I’ve got a few things written while at the cafe, finally found the right melody for another song I was working on last week. Harry types out to Y/N, biting on the nail of his thumb after hitting send. He’s been leaning on the guitar in his lap for the past twenty minutes. That melody was found, but pushed away after he got into texting Y/N.
Not too distracting, although I think Sammy is jealous no one’s sending him any silly gifs. A second text shows up only seconds later, Harry’s sometimes surprised at how fast Y/N can type. And that’s good though! Will I ever get to hear you play in person besides through the wall our apartments share?
Harry smiles over his thumb at the first text but then is biting at his nail again as he reads over the second bubble a few times. He isn’t too surprised that she can hear him play from her apartment, but he is surprised she’s asking to hear him play. He doesn’t think he’s all that great of a guitar player. It’s kind of hard to think when he’s best mates with one of the best guitar players in the industry; Mitch could outplay him any day. Harry stops biting on his nail and hovers his thumbs over his keyboard. Although he’s usually too nervous to just sit and play for someone, he finds himself imagining playing for Y/N.
Tell Sammy I’ll send him some gifs too if he wants. And as for playing for you, maybe... if you catch me on a good day. Y/N shakes her head at his response, somehow not too shocked that’s what he says. She recalls him not telling her what popular songs he had written, how his cheeks grew a shade of pink at the mere idea of Y/N knowing of his work. So, she’ll take her odds and pray that someday soon she gets Harry on a good day and hears him play something.
“Y/N,” Amanda’s voice calling her name causes Y/N to jump, sitting straight up in her seat and nearly dropping her phone. She shuts off the screen and feels the vibration from her Apple watch, a notification reading that it was time to head into the conference room to interview new interns with Amanda. Y/N looks over her shoulder to see Amanda standing behind her with her eyebrows raised and her lifeline of a notebook in hand. “You alright?” She asks, slight concern in her tone.
“Yeah,” Y/N clears her throat and stands from her desk, wobbling on her heeled boots as she gathers up her laptop and cell phone. “I’m all good, ready to find us some new interns,” she states with a smile.
Amanda gives her a look as if doubting her, but then nods as Y/N steps in front of her and they move into the conference room. It’s not until their third candidate that Y/N thought of her boyfriend. Her watch buzzes, flashing up at text from Mark, then one from Sammy right away. She ignores them and tries to focus on listening to yet another fashion student talk about their love for the industry and the company. She was once just like them, sitting on the other side of this conference table and grinning ear to ear from just being in the building. She still felt excited to come into work every day and she feels very grateful to still feel that way. So, therefore she doesn’t hate sitting there for a few hours and having a handful of first impressions with girls that she once was. But, in the back of her mind she’s wondering what Mark could have texted her. It’s been five days since the phone call she ended up hanging up on him. What could he possibly have to say?
“Thank you for coming in today,” Amanda says with a smile to their last interview of the day. The small blonde stands up as the two of them do, and reaches across the table to shake both of their hands before saying short goodbyes and letting one of the receptionists walk them out.
“I think I liked her the best,” Y/N comments, writing a quick note beside her resume.
“I agree. We’ll email back and forth a bit more about it. I’ve got another phone meeting with a few clients for the new year first,” Amanda explains as she’s reading over her planner before snapping it shut.
“Sounds like fun,” Y/N nods before walking separate ways from Amanda and heading back to her desk. As she gets closer, she can't help but notice the oversized bouquet of flowers on her desk. Her eyebrows pinch together as she slows her steps, taking in the beautiful pinks and oranges in the bouquet before reaching for the card that stuck out of it. Sammy pops up then, right by Y/N’s side almost breathing down her neck.
“Did you not get my text? These showed up like halfway through your interviews,” Sammy states, trying to read the card before Y/N can. She shields it’s away from his eyes and looks at him over her shoulder. “Sorry,” he apologizes and takes a step back.
Y/N reads the printed out note and finds herself sighing as she reads it over again. I’m sorry - Mark. Y/N shakes her head and rolls her lips into her mouth, staring at the bouquet again. That’s it, just sorry? She thinks, but then remembers that he had texted her too. Maybe there’s something more there but Y/N finds herself doubting it.
“Who’s it from?” Sammy questions. Y/N ignores him and pulls out her phone from her back pocket. She unlocks it and taps on her messages app, having to back out of her conversation with Harry in order to open up Mark’s text from earlier.
Did you get the flowers? The company sent me a notification saying someone signed for them. Y/N rolls her eyes at his careless text message; not an ounce of emotion behind any of his words, through text or on the note. She doesn’t find herself smiling at the flowers, thinking how it’s a nice gesture, but instead finding it ridiculous that her boyfriend missed the whole point of the fight and just thinks some random bouquet of flowers will fix everything that she’s feeling. Is he even bothered by the fact they fought and haven’t spoken in five days? She wonders as she shuts off her phone screen without responding.
“Mark sent them,” Y/N finally tells Sammy, turning around to hand him the card. After he grabs it, and Y/N turns back around and places a hand on either side of the vase. She turns on her heels and walks around her desk to the left, moving Sammy’s chair out of the way and placing them on his desk instead. “You can have them, they look better on your desk,” she stays in a flat tone of voice, feeling indifferent about if she should just throw them out or not.
“Are you going to break up with him?” Sammy asks, his voice is quiet and soft - sounding like a caring friend instead of a gossiping coworker.
Y/N bites down on her bottom lip and nods, “yeah, I think I am going to. I just don’t know how, breaking up with someone on the phone feels so shallow and I would hate to be broken up with over the phone.” She explains, turning back around to look at Sammy again. He’s frowning, a look of pity in his eyes.
“But it’s unfair to you both to keep this relationship going on like this, Y/N,” Sammy says, letting out a deep sigh and tosses the card in the garbage bin by Y/N’s desk. “You’ll know what to do, you always do,” Sammy adds on with a smile.
Y/N tries to mirror her friends smile but feels it fall flat on her lips. She’s doubting herself, doubting her choices with Mark these past four months, and she keeps doubting herself all day till she’s walking into her apartment. She closes her door and slips out of her coat. Y/N sighs and pulls out her phone while walking to her bedroom, taking a seat on the end of her bed before pulling up Mark’s contact.
Her fingers hover over the call icon, her heart beating a million miles an hour as she imagines how this phone call is going to go. Should she really break up with him over the phone? She thinks, yet again doubting herself. This was really the only way to do it, seeing as he won’t be in the city for who knows how long. Y/N didn’t want to be in this relationship anymore, especially since it started to feel less like a relationship as the days went on this past month. Y/N inhales deeply just as her phone begins to ring, Mark’s contact picture of him kissing her cheek fills the screen in her hand. Y/N exhales before tapping the green icon on the phone and bringing it to her ear.
“Hi,” Y/N says softly into the phone.
“Hey, you didn’t answer my text earlier,” Mark starts off the conversation with a hard tone of voice as if he’s annoyed. Y/N licks her lips and nods, even though Mark can’t see her.
“Yeah, um, sorry, work got busy,” she lies. She had the time to text him back, she just didn’t know what to say as her thoughts were clouded with how to break up with him.
“Did you get them?” Mark asks.
“The flowers? Yeah, I did,” Y/N sighs. She’s racking her brain on how to do this. How do you break up with someone over a phone call? She shakes her head and brings a hand to her forehead, pushing her fingers through the roots of her hair. “Mark, we need to talk,” she says, feeling that’s the best she can do - the good ol’ classic line.
“Yeah, we do,” Mark agrees with a sigh from him now. Y/N listens as it’s like something shuffles on the other end of the phone, as if Mark switches his phone from one ear to the other. “Look, Y/N, you’re a wonderful girl, truly, you are. But we’re not really benefiting from this, are we?” Mark says, snapping Y/N out of her thoughts as her brows pinch together.
“Are you breaking up with me?” Y/N questions.
“Uh, yeah-”
“No, no, I’m breaking up with you. I have thought long and hard about this for days now, and I don’t think we should be together anymore, Mark,” Y/N blurts out quickly, feeling as though her moment that she’s been talking herself up to all day was being taken away from her. She releases the grip she had on her hair and stares straight ahead at the painting on her wall, waiting for Mark to say something.
He lets out a long breath, “then I guess this is a lot easier for the both of us then, huh?” He says. Y/N shakes her head in disbelief.
“I guess so,” she mumbles.
“I’ll uh, I’ll send my assistant over soon for any of my things I’ve left at your apartment. She’ll bring the few things of yours that are at my place too. Are you available tomorrow?” Mark explains, asking the question so casually too. In fact, he sounds like he’s distracted with something on his end of the call too.
“Have you had this planned for a while now or something?” She asks, her eyebrows only pull together tighter in confusion. How can he act so unbothered only seconds after breaking up with her? She thinks. Sure, it’s a mutual break up, but she’d be lying if she said she wasn’t bothered by it still.
“Uh, no,” Mark mutters, not sounding convincing at all. Y/N rolls her eyes and shakes her head at herself - how did she even date this guy?
“You know what, whatever,” Y/N breathes out as her eyes close and she runs a hand through her hair, “I’ll be home from work around five in the evening tomorrow for your assistant to come by. Tell her to be on time, please,” she tells Mark.
“Alright,” he says. There’s a couple beats of silence between them, and she doesn’t feel upset over it at all. In fact she feels at peace with this breakup. She supposes that they didn’t date for long, and they never said I love you to each other and really didn’t spend too much time with one another the past two months. Maybe that’s why she’s not bothered by this break up at all.
“Well, it was fun, Mark,” Y/N says, “I wish you the best,” she adds.
“You too, Y/N,” he replies. And with that, Y/N brings the phone from her ear and ends the call. Staring at the screen that was on Mark’s contact info for a few minutes as she lets herself fall into her thoughts.
That was a lot easier than she imagined it to be earlier today. Y/N falls back on her bed, her hair fanning out around her as she holds her phone to her stomach and stares up at the ceiling. Did he have this planned though? She finds herself thinking. She imagines that he sent those flowers earlier to butter her up, maybe, before he called to break her heart only hours later. And having already made plans for his assistant to go through his apartment and bring her things to her. Maybe he already had gathered her things beforehand, meaning over a week ago he would have packed it up - only to come over to her house and fight with her for days on end before making her drive him to the airport. Y/N just shakes her head as her thoughts run wild.
Y/N knows exactly what she needs to do to get out of this overthinking stage that she’s got herself into. She gets up from her bed and opens her closet, her figure skates sitting on the bottom of the closet leaning nicely against each other. She finds an empty tote bag and tosses them inside, then quickly gets dressed into a pair of light blue skinny jeans, a plain white turtleneck long sleeve, and then layering by putting on a dark grey crew neck that has ‘LA’ in white writing across the front.
After making sure she has her wallet, phone and keys, she puts on a black puffer jacket and heads out her front door. Harry’s walking out of the elevator just as Y/N is locking up, he’s got a Starbucks hot drink in hand and a smile on his face.
“Hey,” Harry says, but then his eyebrows pinch together as he realizes the time, “where are you off to?” He wonders. Y/N brushes her hair from her face and lets out a small sigh.
“It’s, like, two weeks till Christmas and I haven’t gone skating yet, so I just got up and grabbed my skates to go out,” she explains, lifting her shoulder that her tote bag was hanging off. Her skates are poking out the top slightly, Harry notices the white figure skates with a pair of matching light pink guards on the bottom.
“Oh, fun,” Harry nods, meeting her eyes again.
Y/N doesn’t even think twice before she’s asking, “did you want to come with me?”
Harry smiles, causing Y/N to mirror him, before he takes a few moments to nod in response. “I would love to, yeah,” Harry clears his throat, noticing how overly excited he may have sounded. “I should dress a bit warmer, though, it’s supposed to snow tonight,” he tells her, motioning to his apartment door down the hall.
“Good call,” Y/N says, following him to his doorway. Harry holds open his door for her after unlocking it, then letting it close softly behind them as he takes off the lighter jacket he had on. Y/N smiles at the decorations around his apartment, loving how the glow from the lights of his tree filled up the space around them before he can turn on any lights.
“I don’t have my own skates, suppose I’m not a real New Yorker like that,” Harry states as he opens the closet beside his front door and starts ruffling around in order to find where his scarfs were hiding.
“That’s fine,” Y/N says with a soft chuckle, turning around to watch as he sticks his head into the closet and pushes things around. “They have rentals at Bryant Park,” she tells him.
“I’ve never been,” Harry admits. He finally gets a hold of the long burgundy scarf with a brown leaf pattern on it, his mum had gifted it to him a few years back. Harry pushes the doors of his closet closed and puts the scarf down for a moment, hanging it on the door handle before he grabs his long black coat to slip it on. Once he’s got that on, he wraps the scarf around his neck, fixing the collar of his coat and the scarf so it’s comfortable.
“You’ve really never been to Bryant Park?” Y/N asks surprisingly. It wasn’t Central Park by any means, but anyone who lived in the Manhattan area typically had walked through Bryant Park.
“Nope,” Harry says, grabbing for his forgotten Starbucks drink, bringing it to his lips for a quick sip. He looks up at Y/N to find her smiling at him. “What?” Harry questions.
“Nothing, I’m just excited for you to see Bryant Park. It’s beautiful during the Winter,” she states.
“Well then, let’s not waste any time, come on,” Harry nods his head to the door and gives her a smile while holding it open for her. She thanks him, waits for him to lock the doors before they fall into step with one another to the elevator. Harry beats her to hitting the button, literally leaning in front of her in order to push the down button before she can. Y/N shakes her head at him, smiling.
“So how was your time at the cafe earlier?” Y/N asks Harry, waiting for the elevator to arrive.
“It was good,” Harry says, tilting his head to the side so he can look at Y/N, “wrote another song about love,” he adds with a smile. Y/N chuckles and raises her eyebrows.
“Never would have guessed,” she teases him.
The whole walk to Bryant Park, all Harry can think about is when the hell was the last time he skated? That and how good Y/N looked, which is a thought that’s always going through his head, to be honest. But he’s stressing himself out, hoping and praying that some sort of muscle memory clicks in and he doesn’t embarrass himself in front of Y/N. God, maybe he should have just saved himself the embarrassing situation and declined her invitation. Harry knew the moment he looked into her eyes there was something a bit off with her; how her smile didn’t quite reach its full potential - so the moment she asked if he wanted to come along with her, he didn’t even think twice before saying yes. The girl has her own figure skates, Harry wouldn’t doubt it if she’s about to skate circles around him.
“All black outfit,” Y/N comments as she watches Harry pick out a pair of black skates in his size, “I don’t think I’ve seen you wear all black before,” she adds with a smile.
“I used to only wear all black,” he admits, “back in uni, I really didn’t venture out in fashion and only wore black jeans and black t-shirts basically all year,” he explains to Y/N, letting her lead the way to the area for skaters to sit on the many benches and do up their skates.
“I truthfully can’t even imagine that,” Y/N replies, taking a seat on the bench right by the open door to the ice rink. She looks out at the about forty people on the ice, lit up by the many Christmas lights hanging over it and a few light posts in each corner too, as the sun has fully set now. The city around them is still hustling and bustling as it always is, which makes her smile.
“It was a tragedy, but I got older and realized that fashion can be fun, especially after moving to New York, seeing what people wear out for some innocent ice skating,” he mentions, taking in Y/N’s fashion forward outfit. The style was very trendy these days, he had noticed - online and in the streets.
“I would be an abomination of a former FIT student if I just walked around New York City in leggings and a hoodie,” Y/N states, “if I’m going somewhere, with someone, I always feel the need to look good.”
“And you do, by the way, look good,” Harry says, his words coming out quick and in a bit of a stumble. Y/N can feel the blush creeping onto her cheeks. She says a quiet ‘thank you’ before she begins to lace up her skates.
Y/N has her skates done up before Harry, so she has an extra minute to take out her phone and open her Instagram app. She checks out her newest comments, liking a few, before she finds herself aimlessly scrolling through her feed and liking some posts there. Checking up on Harry, she notices he’s almost done doing up his skates, so she stands up and grabs her tote bag that now holds her skate guards and chunky black boots.
“Did you want to lock anything up?” Y/N asks Harry, motioning to the small lockers to their left.
He shakes his head, “no thank you,” he says before his attention is back on tying his skates. Y/N smiles at how his tongue pokes out just slightly passed his lips before she turns around and walks over to lock up her tote bag, making sure everything but her phone is inside.
Once the small locker door is closed, she walks over to the wall of the ice rink and opens her Instagram again, putting on a quick filter that makes it look like it’s being filmed with an old film camera before she pans her camera around while holding down the button on the screen. As she turns to face where Harry is, she cuts off the video and double checks he’s not in it. With having so many followers, she always makes sure that her friends and family are comfortable with being posted before doing so. Y/N adds a quick caption of ‘first skate this season’ with a white heart emoji before she posts it to her story, then she slips the phone into her back pocket and walks over to where Harry sat waiting for her.
“Ready?” Harry asks, smiling up at her.
“Yup,” she nods, smiling back at him. Harry nods, muttering ‘alright’ under his breath, and then stands up on wobbling legs. Y/N chuckles and reaches for his elbow, helping him stand up straight. “You’ve skated before, right?” She asks, realizing now that she only assumed that he had.
“Uh, it’s been a few years,” Harry admits, flashing another nervous smile her way. All he can think about is her hand on his arm, and how she hasn’t let go of him yet. Harry hadn’t even thought about the potential arm holding, or hand holding maybe, they could get into here. She has a boyfriend, he reminds himself over and over again as he watches her lips tug up as she smiles back at him again.
“Alright, we’ll take it slow then,” she assures him, pulling at his arm gently to get them moving forward on their skates.
Y/N takes the first step onto the shining ice, letting her blades slide over the top slowly before she takes a sharp turn and is in front of Harry in an instant. His eyebrows fly up his forehead as his eyes fall down to her skates again, noticing how worn out they look now, her left foot lifting up as she sticks the toe of her skate blade into the ice - her whole stance made her look like some sort of professional. Harry’s head snaps up and he meets her gaze, lips now smirking at his stunned expression.
“You’ve been skating a lot before then, hm?” Harry gulps, looking back down at his feet as he inches slowly to the ice.
“Since I was a kid,” Y/N reveals. He’ll touch more on it later, but first he wants to get himself onto the ice and get this embarrassment over with. Harry sighs and starts to place his right foot into the ice, letting out a deep breath as he does but just as quickly as he makes the move he’s slipping. Harry sucks in a sharp breath, ready to fall before he even has both feet on the ice. But both of Y/N’s arms fly out and grab a hold of his forearms, causing him to wrap each of his hands around her much smaller forearms.
Harry shakes his head and just decides to get it over with, pushing both skates onto the ice in a quick motion. Y/N is fully prepared for his sudden movement and skates backwards, checking over her shoulder quickly to make sure she doesn’t get in anyone's way. She keeps a tight grip on Harry’s arms and smiles as she looks up at him and sees the stressed out look on his face.
“You’re doing great,” Y/N assures him, her voice causing Harry to look down and meet her soft eyes. “We can move a bit closer to the wall so you can hang onto it for the first bit?” She suggests, motioning to the wall beside them.
“Probably for the best,” Harry agrees, nodding his head and finally taking his eyes off Y/N’s in order to make his way to the wall. The few movements on his part aren’t as hard as he thought they’d be to get over to the wall. He thinks his muscle memory for skating will click in soon, hopefully.
Y/N takes it slow beside Harry, waiting for him to get comfortable enough to only need one hand on the wall before she lets go of his arm. She already misses the warmth from his touch. Not even one day into her and Mark’s break up and she’s already feeling touch deprived. To be fair, her and Mark hadn’t so much as given each other a few quick pecks and barely snuggling on the couch the last couple days they were together. Y/N shakes her head slightly at her thoughts of Mark.
“So how did you get into skating?” Harry asks after a few moments of them finding a slow pace.
“Um,” Y/N pauses as she thinks of how to explain how her parents didn’t want to spend much time with her, so they stuck her into many different hobbies to fill the void. “I was into a lot of the typical little girl hobbies, dancing, gymnastics, art, but figure skating was something that just really stuck with me as I grew up. Probably in connection with my obsession with the holidays, and the winter season,” Y/N explains, noticing already how Harry’s pace on his skates is picking up.
“Are you, like, really good?” Harry questions. Y/N chuckles and looks away from the ice below them to meet his gaze before he’s glancing down at his skates again in order to keep upright.
“Yup,” Y/N nods, rolling her lips into her mouth to hide her grin.
“So humble,” Harry jokes with a chuckle. “You could probably skate circles around me, huh? Do those little twirly things too?”
“I could do a few spins, yes,” Y/N says and nods her head. “I’ll let you get used to the ice first before I throw out any big moves,” she adds, looking down at how Harry’s feet were moving on the ice. Every minute he is getting better, soon enough he’ll let go of that wall and be able to skate in slow laps around the rink with her.
“How very considerate of you,” Harry notes, causing the both of them to chuckle again.
They do another two laps with Harry’s hand just inches away from the wall, hovering over it just in case he made the wrong move. But then soon enough, they’re mixed in with the other skaters and making strong, smooth strides across the ice. Y/N is laughing at something Harry says about how he must look like Bambi on ice, head thrown back and eyes crinkled up, when Harry just about falls. She catches him gasping and opens her eyes quickly before catching his hand in hers.
“You okay?” She asks, clear concern in her voice as she moves in order to meet his eyes. Harry knows this isn’t the first time they’ve sort of held hands, but it still feels like her skin is too warm for his cold touch and butterflies erupt in his stomach as she cards their fingers together so effortlessly. Damn Styles grow some balls and don’t let her make all the first moves, he thinks to himself.
“‘M alright,” Harry mumbles and nods, completely losing focus on the world around them as they float across the ice looking into each other's eyes and holding hands.
Y/N licks her lips, blinking up at Harry in what feels like an innocent way but realizes the moment his gaze drops to her lips that maybe it isn’t. Clearing her throat, she squeezes Harry’s hand and then slowly lets go. Harry can’t help but feel disappointed by how short they’d held hands for, he was hoping it would at least last a whole lap around the rink. Y/N shivers and sticks both of her hands into her coat pockets, playing off letting go of his hand with being cold, but in reality touching Harry’s skin made her feel like she was on fire.
“Tell me what your favourite colour is,” Harry blabs out loud suddenly.
Y/N furrows her brows and looks up at Harry. He’s no longer watching the ice with each stride of his skates, instead his posture is completely at ease almost as he seems much more confident on the ice now. Something tells Y/N that Harry is stupidly good at pretty much anything and if he doesn’t get it right the first time it would only take a few more before he masters it.
“It changes almost every other day,” Y/N admits, biting down on her bottom lip - which causes Harry’s eyes to flicker down to her lips yet again. “Lately it’s been green,” she exclaims, as she speaks Harry’s gaze falls back to her eyes.
“Like my eyes?” Harry teases, batting his eyelashes.
There’s suddenly a group of teenagers in their way, causing their conversation to pause as they have to maneuver around the few bodies. Harry finds that he doesn’t struggle at all with the quick movements he has to make with his skates in order to get around them. He smiles to himself, proud of how fast he’s picked up skating again. Maybe he’ll try the little twirly spin around Y/N to impress her. Too bad she’s much more talented on skates and is picking up speed before making a quick turn and is now skating backwards in front of Harry with her eyes narrowed and a tight smile on her lips.
“Firstly, that was a poor set up to try and get a compliment out of me, I’ll just tell you that your eyes are very pretty,” Y/N states. Harry smiles at her words, those pesky butterflies back in his stomach once again. “And second, my favourite green is more like a dark, rich, forest green,” she explains, quickly looking over her shoulder as they turn the corner of the rink. Harry notices how effortlessly she picks up her skates and crosses them over each other to smoothly take the turn.
“Like a Christmas tree?” Harry wonders.
Y/N smiles and nods, “exactly, like a Christmas tree,” she says, a beat of silence between them before she asks, “what’s your favourite colour?”
“Pink,” Harry answers without missing a beat. It’s been his favourite for years now, since he was just a young lad.
“Like my lips?” Y/N teases, her voice dropping down into a low and soft tone that causes a fire to spark in the pit of Harry’s stomach. His eyes drop to her lips at the mention of them, which Y/N notices and smirks at him before she’s turning on her skates and facing forward again. They both don’t say anything as they skate around the other turn of the rink, avoiding an older couple that has slowed down in front of them. Y/N still has a smug look on her face when Harry glances to his left where she skates beside him. Obviously, yes, exactly like the shade of your lips, Harry thinks and wishes he had the guts to say aloud.
“More like,” Harry pauses and then smiles, “like the Pink Panther,” Harry jokes.
“You know what, fair enough,” Y/N chuckles and shrugs her shoulder.
The two of them continue to ask each other more random favourites, getting the basics down with favourite foods, favourite alcoholic drinks, and favourite word too, of course. In fact, they are just skating at a leisurely pace for quite some time. Y/N notices that the number of people on the rink dwindles down to a mere twenty and she lifts her Apple watch up, so it lights up and shows her the time. Bryant Park should be closing within an hour or two, depending if they’re on holiday hours yet, meaning that Harry and her have spent nearly two hours out on the ice together.
“I think it’s time you bust out some of those fancy figure skating moves,” Harry suddenly says unprovoked. Y/N furrows her brows and shakes her head, watching a young couple, just a few people ahead of them, holding hands, like how she wishes her and Harry could have been this entire time. But it’s too soon, she thinks.
“I don’t know,” Y/N mutters under her breath, her eyes still on the couple as they’re laughing together - much like how her and Harry have been. Did these strangers around them think they were a couple?
“Fine,” Harry huffs and starts to skate a bit faster to be a few strides ahead of Y/N before he comes to a wobbly stop a bit more into the middle of the rink out of everyone's way. Y/N comes to a much smoother stop in front of him. “I’ll give it a shot then, how hard can it be to spin around a few times.”
Famous last words, Y/N thinks as Harry tries to whip his body around to try and attempt to do a spin. She can already see how he’s lifting the toe of his left skate, the small ridges getting caught on the ice while his body is still trying to spin around. Y/N’s eyes widen as she suddenly tries to stop him, her hands just barely getting a hold of his arms before he can fall. But his weight is too much and her skates slip out from under her. A small screech escapes her mouth as the two of them begin their fall to the ice - for surprisingly the first time tonight. Harry turns them both so he gets the worst of the fall, moving Y/N so she falls more on top of him rather than on the ice. Y/N notices and quickly moves her hand to the back of his head to ensure he doesn’t smack it against the hard surface. Her fingers card through his hair, while her other hand is clenching into a fist around the fabric of his coat.
“Shit,” Harry groans as the bodies fall to the ice. Thankfully, he tries to sit up a bit during the fall, so he doesn’t hit his head but instead he feels immediately pain shot up his elbow and backside.
“Oh my god,” Y/N gasps, blinking several times as she takes in what had happened. “Are you okay? Are you hurt?” She asks Harry in a rush of words.
“I’m okay,” he nods, which causes Y/N to realize her hand is still brushing through his hair. She rubs his scalp a few times with her thumb before removing her hand and quickly lifting her body off of Harry’s. “I’ll probably have a bruised ass, but I guess that’s karma,” he tries to joke.
Y/N frowns and smacks his arm gently, “don’t pull that shit again, oh my god, I thought we were going to end our night in the ER.”
Harry chuckles and sits up, taking in how Y/N has sat up on her knees with both her hands resting on her thighs. Her hair is a bit of a mess and her eyes wide and wild with emotion - but otherwise she looks alright. Thankfully, Harry did good and kept her safe in their fall.
“Just need a few ice packs and maybe a joint before bed to ease the pain,” Harry says, only half joking.
“Wait,” Y/N’s eyebrows pinch together, “do you smoke weed?” She asks. To be honest, she couldn’t imagine Harry as some pothead. Not that there was a true look to a ‘pothead’ these days. Hell, she’s had her fair share of joints and edibles while in college. Even afterwards too, Sammy loved to roll a joint or two towards the end of their wine nights.
Harry shrugs and begins to get up from the ice slowly. “Not really. It makes me a bit sleepy, truthfully,” he tells her.
“I get that,” Y/N nods, “I don’t smoke often, but when I do, I typically fall asleep within the hour after smoking. It annoys the crap out of Sammy.” She tells Harry truthfully. Harry nods as well, only a little bit surprised to learn that Y/N didn’t say no to drugs in her youth. Not that he was judging, far from it really cause he had no room to judge, but he just simply didn’t imagine her consuming anything more than a bottle or two of wine.
The two of them get up off the ice now, finally getting back on their feet. A sigh leaves Y/N lips as she brushes her hands on her jeans. “I think you falling is our cue to get out of here,” she suggests, skating slowly backwards towards the doorway where the benches were.
“You’re probably right,” Harry agrees and begins to follow her, trying not to whine with his movements as a sharp pain stings his bottom with each stride of his skates.
Y/N leaves Harry to sit on the bench they had used before and goes over to unlock her locker and get her tote bag. Harry’s lucky no one stole his shoes he had just left under the bench with no care in the world, she thinks as she walks back over and sits beside him. She unties her skates and is slipping on her boots before Harry can even untie one of his skates. Y/N puts the guards on her skates and places them into her tote bag before turning to look at Harry, noticing the pained look in his face as he bends forward to work on the laces of his other skate.
“Did you need help?” She asks him.
“No,” Harry pauses to hiss in pain, “I’m fine,” he adds, but Y/N just rolls her eyes and scoots over on the bench till she’s nearly pressing right up against Harry’s side, leaning down in order to work on his laces.
Harry watches her nimble fingers untie and loosen the laces, noticing how her hair falls as she bends down further. A faint smell of roses hits him with the movement of her hair as she pushes it back away from her line of sight. Harry looks away, glancing around them to see if anyone’s watching them because from any other view it may look like Y/N is giving him-
“There you go,” Y/N says with a smile and sits up again. Harry looks at his skates to see them completely loosened and ready for him to slip off easily.
“Thanks,” Harry says quietly with a smile.
After Harry has his trusty not-so-white vans on, they walk over to return his rentals and make their way out of the ice rink area of Bryant Park. Harry notices the shops around the park, the painted white frames and clean windows were rather pleasing to look at while the inside glows with soft yellow lights. He wonders what they sell, but notices Y/N hiding a yawn behind her hand and decides it’s probably best they just head home. Also, his ass really did hurt with each step he took.
“Would you like to get a hot cocoa before we walk home?” Harry suggests, pointing to the small shack that was open and looks like it serves hot drinks and a few treats maybe.
“I would love that,” Y/N answers with a bright smile.
Her heart can’t help but burst at the thought that Harry knows her so well already. Not even a month of knowing one another and he already is so much better than Mark ever was. He would never go skating with her or buy her a nice warm drink afterwards either. It’s a good thing he’s not your boyfriend anymore, Y/N finds herself reminding herself, which causes her heart to pitter patter in her chest again. This time thinking about how maybe Harry could maybe be her boyfriend, one day.
“Hi,” Y/N gives the small brunette at her front door a tight smile.
She’s almost thirty minutes later than Mark said she would be. But to be fair, the subway was later than usual on her way home so Y/N had only just gotten home ten minutes ago. She had texted Mark to let him know and relay the message to his assistant, but he didn’t answer, no surprise there. So, in hindsight it wasn’t the biggest deal that his pretty little assistant was late.
What the big deal was the way she just strolled into Y/N’s apartment and set the box of her things on the couch. Y/N is standing by her door still in disbelief, mouth hanging open and eyes wide at the girls behaviour. When she turns around and gives Y/N a funny look while pointing around at her Christmas decor.
“It looks like Mrs Claus threw up in here,” she says.
“Thanks,” Y/N mutters and walks over to where she stood by the couch. Mark’s assistant steps back, pulling out her phone and tapping away at the screen as she seems bored to be here. “I’ll go get Mark’s things,” Y/N says, but then just as she’s about to walk away her eyes catch something red near the top of the box of her things that Mark had packed up.
She pushes her favourite Eagles shirt out of the way and hooks one finger around the lacy red fabric. The Victoria’s Secret label sticks out of the barely there red thong that’s hanging off her index finger. Y/N doesn’t recognize the underwear, she thinks as her head begins to spin. How the fuck did a pair of woman's underwear get into this box of things Mark packed up? Why would he have a red thong at his apartment that wasn’t Y/N’s? What the actual fuck? Another round of questions are about to spew in Y/N’s head as her heart beats out of her chest but then suddenly Mark’s assistant is reaching for the lacy fabric and taking it out of Y/N’s grasp.
“Oh, those are mine. Must’ve slipped in by accident,” she stammers out the words. Y/N’s head is spinning, her heart is beating out of her chest, as she puts the pieces together.
“Really? A thong just slipped into the box?” Y/N urges, narrowing her eyes at the young brunette standing in her living room. “How long have you been fucking my boyfriend?” Y/N asks and raises her voice, the anger filling her whole body now.
“Ex boyfriend,” the brunette has the guts to utter out.
“Answer the damn question,” Y/N snaps back at her.
Her face is turning red, to match the stupid thong in her hands, “uh, it’s none of your business-”
“Just tell me!” Y/N shouts, feeling like she deserves some truth in this moment. Mark’s assistant visibly gulps, avoiding Y/N’s eyes and looks all around the room.
“Like, a few months,” she mutters under her breath, still not meeting Y/N’s burning gaze.
Her whole body is shaking with the anger coursing through her. She should have known. How could she be such an idiot? She thinks while shaking her head. Of course, Mark was cheating on her during the entirety of their relationship. They were only dating for four months, meaning that for at least half of it, he was busy screwing his fucking assistant - how unbelievably cliche of him, but also how unbelievably naive of her to not guess. Y/N brings a hand to her forehand and rubs at her temple as a headache begins.
“Can I just get Mark’s stuff and go-”
“Get. Out.” Y/N spits out the words, glaring at the brunette who has the audacity to be so nonchalant about being the other woman.
“What about his things?” Mark’s assistant all but winces out the words, her dark eyebrows pulling together.
“Tell Mark to eat a dick,” Y/N sneers, taking a step towards the girl which causes her to step back. She can’t deny the bit of joy she feels at the sight of fear in the girls eyes. “And get out of my apartment, now!” Y/N shouts at the woman.
“Whatever,” she mumbles, turning around and walking to the front door.
Y/N is hot on her heels, making sure to slam to door shut behind her. The moment she’s left to herself, her apartment falling silent around her, she feels the pain settle in. Mark cheated on her with his assistant that he then had the nerve to let come over to her apartment. The realization of how embarrassing this whole situation is hits her, along with the hurt too. Regardless if it was a mutual break up, being cheated on does not feel good. Y/N sniffles, bringing a hand to her mouth as she suddenly is holding back sobs. Tears fall down her cheeks while her brain runs wild thinking of how many times Mark could have fucked his assistant and then just waltzed into her apartment and then they-
Her thoughts are cut short as she’s bolting to her bathroom, throwing the door open and bending down in front of the toilet. She lifts the seat and empties her stomach into the bowl. After a moment she’s coughing, lifting her head out of the toilet and reaching for the lever to flush away any contents that were in her stomach. Y/N grabs the hand towel to her right and brings it to her mouth, wiping away the bit of drool at her lips.
Y/N can feel the vibration from her cell phone after a moment of sitting on the bathroom floor, zoned out on the shower and thinking about how stupid she could have been to trust Mark. She lets out a short sigh and reaches into her back pocket to find her buzzing phone. Her eyes roll on instinct of seeing Mark’s contact photo taking up her screen. A part of her wants to answer, to yell and to scream at him. But a bigger part of her feels sick to her stomach again and just tired, honestly. So, she ignores the call and opens her phone to her contacts and deletes Mark all together. She goes into her photos and does a quick sweep of any photos of them together. It was something she was going to do eventually anyways, but after the news of him being a cheating piece of shit she couldn’t waste another second before getting rid of anything involving Mark.
Mark is a fucking asshole. His precious little assistant came by to drop off my few things and one of her thongs was in the box, so she spilled the beans that she had been sleeping with Mark for months. Meaning that piece of absolute trash was cheating on me like the entire time we were together. Y/N types out the message to Sammy, making sure that he knows the drama first - but also just simply because he’s her best friend.
Sammy is typing back a response as Y/N stands up from her spot by the toilet, flushing it again due to her spitting a few times into the bowl, and then she quickly washes her hands and looks up at her reflection in the mirror. Her eyes are red, her hairs a bit frizzy and out of place from the perfect curls she had earlier today, and her makeup is ruined. She decides to wash her face, drying it with a clean towel as her phone vibrates on the counter.
Are you fucking kidding me?! I’m going to kill him. Please tell me we have a murder plan, I know where we can hide the body. Did you want to talk about it? I can come over and bring a big bottle of tequila? Sammy sends each sentence as a separate text, adding a few choice emojis too. The knife is used many times. His enthusiasm makes Y/N chuckle but then she’s frowning again while walking out of the bathroom and to her bedroom.
Honestly, I just want to curl up in bed and cry it out some more while listening to some sad music. But I’ll keep you updated on any murder plans I think up. Y/N sends back her texts before throwing her phone down on her bed.
Letting out another sigh, Y/N strips out of her tight fitting pants and puts on a pair of grey sweatpants. Next, she takes off the collared button up shirt she had worn tucked into her pants today, hanging it back up in her closet to prevent it from getting wrinkled. Her eyes wander around her bedroom, a certain article of clothing was on her mind to put on and snuggle into bed with. Y/N smiles as she sees Harry’s black hoodie on the top of her laundry hamper. To be honest, it needed to be washed, but she needed the comfort of his oversized clothing more. So, she tugs it on, puts her hair into a messy topknot bun, and tugs down the hood before lifting the blanket and getting into bed.
Not even three songs into her ‘depressed? yeah, me too’ playlist of sad songs, there was a knock on Y/N’s front door. At first she thinks of ignoring whoever it is, but then her music is cut off as a phone call comes through. It’s Mark’s number, regardless that she just deleted his contact, she still knew his phone number. Y/N groans and gets out of bed. Her heart is pounding in her chest as she imagines Mark or that little assistant of his having the balls to come to her apartment again and demand for his few things he had left around here. Y/N narrows her eyes and unlocks her door, ready to glare at her sad excuse for an ex boyfriend - but her face instantly softens at the sight of Harry standing there.
“Nice jumper,” Harry comments. A smile on his lips as he takes in how Y/N looks in his clothing, days after he had lent it to her. But that smile vanishes when he notices the redness in her eyes and her pouting lips. “What’s wrong?” Harry asks, his voice full of worry as he fights back reaching for her and bringing her in for a hug.
Y/N sniffles, “um, I thought you were Mark, sorry,” she says in a quiet voice.
“Oh, sorry, is he coming over?” Harry questions. Suppose it made more sense for her boyfriend to comfort her during a bad day, he thinks although it tears him up inside that it can’t be him.
“No, no, he’s in Arizona, or somewhere. I don’t even know,” Y/N sighs, her voice sounding brittle, like it’s about to crack at any second, as she tries to keep herself composed in front of Harry. “I don’t really care actually, we broke up,” she reveals, her gaze down at the floor. Harry’s wearing those dirty white vans again, she wonders if he wears anything else.
They broke up, holy shit don’t freak out Styles, keep it together, Harry’s thoughts are all jumbled up at the news of Y/N and her boyfriends break up, which she is clearly very upset over, judging by her appearance and how she’s sniffling every second - bringing the sleeve of his Columbia jumper to her face to wipe her nose. Harry frowns and adjusts his weight from one foot to the other.
“I’m sorry to hear that, Y/N,” Harry says softly, “break ups can really suck,” he adds - knowing from experience just how terrible break ups can leave a person feeling.
“Yeah,” Y/N breathes out and looks up at Harry now, “but he’s kind of a trash human so it’s for the best, honestly,” she tells him, letting out a breathy chuckle while shaking her head. She shouldn’t be crying so damn much over the guy, she thinks.
“Oh, well then, fuck that guy,” Harry agrees with a nod of his head.
Y/N lets out a genuine chuckle at his words. She brings a hand, that is covered by the cuff of Harry’s hoodie, to her forehead to swipe back any crazy wispy hairs that are in her face. “So, what brought you to knock on my door?” She asks, smiling as Harry realizes he had gotten distracted by her state and forgot why he knocked at all.
“Right,” Harry chuckles, “um, a few friends of mine are in this band, it’s nothing crazy they just play at the pub a few blocks away. And I was wondering if you weren’t busy if you wanted to come with, thought it could be fun. But if you’re not in the mood to leave your home I understand,” Harry explains to her.
“No, I would love to come with,” Y/N insists. She lets out another chuckle and motions to her current appearance. “Just not looking like this, and as long as you promise there will be liquor involved in this Saturday night out.”
“I’ll buy you as many drinks as you need,” Harry promises with a smile.
“Then count me in,” Y/N says, mirroring his big dimpled smile. “Just give me some time to get ready?”
“You’ve got plenty of time, we don’t have to leave for another hour and a half,” he tells her. “I’ll let you get to it,” he adds, throwing a thumb over his shoulder as he takes a step away from her doorway.
“Oh, I’ll wash the sweater and give it to you soon, by the way,” Y/N says, lifting both her arms before letting them fall to her sides. Harry just shrugs his shoulders and shakes his head.
“Keep it as long as you need, it’s no problem, honestly,” Harry tells her while flashing a grin her way, hoping that it makes her feel even a little bit better. And it does, his casual response to her wearing his hoodie and then those dimples - it had her stomach fluttering. She gives Harry a small timid smile, tucking her chin down slightly into the collar of the hoodie as she watches his walk backwards down the hall to his door. “I’ll come knocking again in a bit,” Harry adds before he’s out of her sight and she’s closing her front door shut once again.
Y/N absentmindedly brings her hand to her mouth, biting on her nails as she stares off at her Christmas tree - though the lights are blurry due to her zoning out. You can do this, Y/N thinks and begins to give herself a pep talk of getting out of the sad break up phase and going out with Harry and his friends. Oh my god, Y/N’s eyes widen at her thoughts, what am I going to wear?
Y/N felt overdressed.
After twenty minutes of ripping apart her closet and tearing items out of her dresser drawers, she was truly tempted to just keep on Harry’s hoodie, pair it with some good jeans and some red heeled boots and call it a day. But that would be weird, showing up to hang out and meet Harry’s friends while dressed in his clothing. She was sure they were already going to assume things with him just bringing her along. Y/N didn’t need them thinking they had sex before too.
The thought had made Y/N blush like crazy as she tore off the stupidly comfortable hoodie and grabbed a silky white top that plunged low in the neckline, tying off just at her belly button, and then had long flowy sleeves. Pairing this with her trusted pair of light blue jeans, and for accessories: some chunky gold hoop earrings and layered gold necklaces to fill up the amount of skin she was showing at her chest. To top it all off, she slipped into her go-to black Balenciaga boots and long brown jacket to keep warm. After heading into the bathroom quickly, she brushed her hair through again and restyled the curls, put on a touch of light makeup, and then made sure to stick her lip gloss in her small black purse just as Harry was knocking on her door again.
Harry was dressed in a grey t-shirt with a large yellow smiley face, brown trousers and a blue and cream plaid jacket that quite literally made chills wash over Y/N’s body when she saw the whole fit - but that jacket, it made her head spin with some rather inappropriate thoughts. She’s a fashion major, can’t blame her for thinking clothing can make someone even more attractive. But even then she should have gotten the vibe of this evening and changed into something more casual.
But she didn’t, so now as she’s walking into a dive bar a few blocks away from the apartment building, she feels very out of place. Everyone’s wearing t-shirts and jeans, it smelt like cheap beer and cigarettes, and was definitely not the place to wear a silky white top that cost about five-hundred-dollars.
“You alright?” Harry's voice is soft and closer, as he steps directly behind Y/N after walking into the bar.
He notices how she crossed her arms at her chest and seemed to tense up almost immediately after walking in. Y/N shivers at the feeling of Harry’s breath falling over her exposed neck, having pushed her hair to lay on her left shoulder while he stood over her right. Y/N is still looking around the bar, trying to put together who may be Harry’s group of friends in this crowded bar.
“Y/N?” Harry tries again, this time placing a delicate hand on the small of her back - barely touching her, that he’s not even sure she’s noticed through her thick jacket. But she does, and she feels dizzy at the sweet gesture.
“Yeah,” she sighs, blinking a few times before looking to her right shoulder at Harry. He’s lips are so close, she thinks while trying her best to keep her eyes on his eyes. “Just feeling a little overdressed,” Y/N admits with a tight smile.
Harry shakes his head, “you look fine, better than fine actually. You look amazing,” Harry watches as Y/N’s eyes flicker to his lips for just a split second. He smiles but clears his throat, finding that they’re both blushing at his comment now. “As any FIT student in New York City should, of course,” he adds on to try and make his compliment a little less obvious.
“Thanks, Harry,” Y/N smiles.
When Harry saw Y/N for the second time that evening, it was like day and night from the hour before when she answered her door in his hoodie. She looked incredible, and was so out of his league. Dressed like she was going to a photoshoot, hair flowing down her back perfectly, and accessories that made him visibly gulp - he was a sucker for some gold jewelry on a girl, it was a weird weakness of his. And now, standing in the dim lighting of this dingy dive bar, she did look a little out of place, but in the best way possible, like she shined too bright to be in just a dark and depressing place.
“This way,” Harry says, leading the way to where he notices his friends are sitting at a table. They thankfully got his texts about him bringing Y/N with him and had two seats open for the both of them.
“Should we stop at the bar and get a drink?” Y/N asks. She’s honestly unsure how the service works at a place like this. To be honest, she hadn’t been in too many dive bars in her years.
Harry stops, looks behind him at her, and shakes his head. “We have a waitress that works basically every night my friends play, so she’ll come by and get our drinks for us,” he explains to Y/N. She nods, giving him a tight smile, and Harry can’t help but notice how she’s still got her arms crossed at her chest. Is she uncomfortable here? Maybe he can make some shit excuse after the first few songs and get her home.
Harry notices as he’s turned towards Y/N just how much attention is on her. He’s not surprised, seeing how he already realized how much she sticks out in a place like this, but he doesn’t quite enjoy seeing every male’s - and a few girls too - eyes in this place on the girl he’s brought with him. So, he makes the quick decision of holding out his hand for Y/N to take. She looks at Harry’s outstretched hand and feels her breath get caught in her throat. Playing it off, she smiles and reaches forward, watching as his much larger hand envelopes hers and tugs gently to get them moving again. Y/N’s stomach is already full of butterflies and her head is spinning at them holding hands for all of ninety seconds it takes to get to his table full of friends - she needs a drink, stat.
Harry lets go of Y/N’s hand as he approaches his friend's usual table and has to bring his arms up in order to hug Adam, who’s throwing himself into Harry at the sight of him. Harry huffs out a laugh, making a comment about how drunk Adam must be already, to which he responds by smacking Harry’s back a few times and laughing with him. Y/N can’t help it as the corners of her lips turn up into a small smile at the sight of Harry engulfed in a hug by a man bigger than him. As she’s watching their interaction, she notices how everyone else is watching her. Y/N’s smile falls right away and she finds herself crossing her arms at her chest again.
“Everyone,” Harry speaks a bit louder in order to get everyone's attention as he turns around and holds his arm out to Y/N, which she takes as her singal to step forward for an introduction and smiles timidly at the group of four others at the table. “This is Y/N, Y/N, this is everyone,” Harry announces, smiling at his friends - catching Mitch’s smug look in return.
“Hi,” Y/N says, her voice that soft and gentle tone that he had grown to like, quite a lot, actually.
“I’m Tom,” he’s the first to speak up, offering a hand to Y/N to shake, which she turns just a bit to her left in order to properly greet Harry’s friend. Tom’s got bleached hair that’s not styled and laying flat on his forehead, his roots are a dark brown that match the mustache and bit of bread he’s got. Y/N notices the few different necklaces around his neck while he’s wearing a simple outfit of a black long sleeve and black jeans.
“Jenny,” the woman sitting to Tom's left reaches over the table in order to shake Y/N’s hand. She’s also got bleached hair, and a dazzling smile too. Y/N notices the equally dazzling ring on her finger and she glances down at Tom’s hands to see a wedding band, assuming they are married due to them sitting so closely.
“Mitch,” a long haired young man speaks up just as Y/N and Jenny drop their hands. Y/N meets his gaze and blinks a few times, feeling slightly intimidated by him. Regardless of how he seems like the scrawniest at the table, his eyes just sort of bring Y/N to a stop, but she recovers swiftly and gives him a smile, returning the wave he gives her as it’s too far of a reach to shake hands. Mitch raises a brow at Harry, to which Harry is quick to return. Catching the interaction, Y/N imagines they are the closest of the group. Suppose he’s just a bit protective of his friend bringing a random girl around, Y/N thinks to herself before her attention is grasped by the last person sitting at the table.
“And I’m Adam, the only name you need to remember, obviously,” says the man who had hugged Harry upon their arrival. He’s smiling so widely there’s crinkles near his eyes, which make Y/N feel all warm inside as she stares into his big brown eyes. He’s got a full bread, like Mitch, and matching brown hair that looks like it may need a bit of a trim but he styles it well. Y/N likes his button up shirt that’s a dark navy with little white stars all around it, paired with some plain black jeans.
“It’s really lovely to meet you all,” Y/N says after shaking Adam’s hand, “thank you for letting me come crash your night,” she adds with another timid smile.
“Nonsense, it’s nothing special,” Jenny assures her, waving her hand too before wrapping it around her half full glass of what Y/N assumed was alcohol - or hoped, because she really didn’t want to be the only one drinking tonight.
“Ouch,” Adam scoffs jokingly, “guess your husbands best mates playing is nothing special then, huh?”
“Yeah, I’m hurt, Jenny,” Mitch nods, bringing his glass up to his lips to take a sip of the dark yellow foaming liquid in his tall glass - beer, okay, sweet, so we’re all drinking, good, Y/N thinks. She also notices that Mitch is the only one with an American accent. She wonders how this group all became friends, being from different parts of the world, where did they all connect?
Harry chuckles and shakes his head at his friends, looking to Y/N to find her smiling at his mates too. He places a hand on her elbow, causing her to look at him. He nods his head to the open seats on the other side of the table for them. Y/N rolls her lips into her mouth and begins to walk around the table, stepping behind Tom and Jenny’s chairs before stopping at the first one on Jenny’s right. Y/N catches Mitch’s stare, now ignoring the conversation at the table to instead watch Harry and her, but she’s quick to look away from his intense gaze and focus on taking her jacket off. Just as she tosses her jacket over the back of her chair, fixing her top in a discreet manner too, a red headed woman steps up in between her and Harry who is also slipping out of his jacket.
“Hey, Harry,” the woman greets him in a sultry tone. If Harry notices the obvious show she puts into her voice, he doesn’t act like it.
“Hey, Amy,” he says quickly, looking at his chair as he pulls it out and takes a seat.
“Running a bit behind your friends tonight, huh? What took you so long?” She asks. Seems she's rather observant of Harry’s presence, Y/N thinks, while she takes her seat and looks anywhere but to her right where the red head - fake red dye too, it was so obvious - back was mere inches away from her.
“I love your top, it’s so stylish,” Jenny comments, causing Y/N to look to her left at Jenny’s dazzling smile again.
“Thank you,” Y/N says, “this may not be the place to wear it, seems more like a casual band tee kind of place,” she notes, narrowing her eyes while looking around at the bar around them. Noticing now just how many neon signs there were in the dark space. The biggest was on the wall behind the small stage, which every table was facing. The bar was at the back of the bar and there were booths lining the wall closest to the door, then a couple of pool tables and gambling machines in the far right of the bar. Y/N had spent too much time in high maintenance bougie bars to find any of this remotely normal - but she didn’t hate it.
“Rubbish, you look hot, definitely got people in here questioning their wardrobe,” Jenny states, gaining Y/N’s attention again, “hell, next time I’m stepping it up to match this energy,” she adds, waving her hands at Y/N’s outfit.
Y/N chuckles and shakes her head, “well thanks, but you look incredible already! There’s no need.”
“Y/N,” Harry interrupts the girls suddenly.
Y/N lets out a small breath before turning to face what she’s been ignoring. The flirtatious red head and Mitch’s strong stare. Y/N raises her eyebrows at Harry. She completely ignores how the waitress now stood facing both their chairs, but she did notice how her hand was resting on the back of Harry’s.
“What are you drinking tonight?” Harry asks her, lips turning up into a smile. He can’t help himself, he finds himself smiling so much around her he’s sure he has wrinkles already.
“Oh,” Y/N says, finally looking at the waitress now. Her dark makeup made her blue eyes pop, it was a bit smudged but Y/N assumes she’s too busy working to notice. The waitress, Amy - Y/N reads her name tag, pinned on her tight black v neck shirt that has the bar's name on it - is staring at her, clearly forcing a smile while waiting for Y/N’s answer. “I’ll have tequila and soda water, bring a few lime slices on the side too,” Y/N orders, knowing exactly how Upper East Side she sounds, “please,” she adds with a forced smile that she mirrors from Amy.
“Coming right up,” Amy nods before turning away, not without a lingering gaze on Harry though.
Her obvious fake customer voice was rather annoying, Y/N thinks as her eyes follow her walking back to the bar. She takes note of the crowd around the bar, many waving at the one bartender stationed behind the bar. He looks older and is struggling to keep up with the rush of people. When Y/N turns back around, to face the table again, she catches Harry eyes on her. She scrunches up her nose at him and he chuckles before their attention is taken away by Adam’s deep voice.
“So, Y/N, you're this bloke’s neighbour, huh?” He questions, nodding his head to Harry. Y/N smiles and nods, sitting back in her chair while folding her hands between her thighs.
“Yeah, we just met in passing and ended up becoming friends,” she states, catching Harry nodding in the corner of her eye while he rests an arm on the table and faces towards her as he leans slightly into Mitch. To which Mitch responds by pushing his shoulder gently, making Harry’s smile widen at how he manages to bother his friend so easily.
“Give us the tea. How shit of a neighbour is he?” Adam asks, causing everyone at the table to chuckle.
“Hey,” Harry playfully whines at his friends.
“He’s fine, great even,” Y/N tells them, earning another smile from Harry as he watches her.
“Surprising considering he’s a shit roommate,” Mitch comments after taking another long sip of his beer. Harry turns in his chair and glares at Mitch, earning a smirk from him in return.
“I am not,” Harry grumbles.
“When were you two roommates?” Y/N asks, finding herself bringing a hand up to adjust her necklaces. Anything to keep her nervous hands busy. Suppose making new friends wasn’t her biggest strength, it was a rather nerve wracking experience to be honest.
“We just room together when we travel for any work stuff,” Harry answers, meeting her eyes for only a brief second before he’s looking back at Mitch. “Mitch here just likes his beauty sleep, while I have a pretty set morning routine I like to stick to,” Harry explains, looking back at Y/N as he finishes talking.
“Yeah, that starts at like six in the morning like a crazy person,” Mitch huffs jokingly.
“Six is way too early,” Y/N agrees, nodding along with Mitch. “At least give the man till nine,” she adds.
“He’s just being dramatic,” Harry states. Mitch mumbles something under his breath before taking another sip of his beer. Sounded a bit like “say’s the drama queen himself” but Y/N isn’t sure. Regardless, the interaction makes her smile. Just as she’s about to make another comment, Amy returns with hers and Harry’s drinks. Setting his down first with a smile before turning to Y/N and placing the glass of tequila and a small dish of limes too.
“Thank you,” Y/N says. Doesn’t matter if she thought Amy had an attitude problem, Y/N had manners.
“Anything else for the table? Another refill for you boys before you head up on stage?” Amy asks, ignoring Y/N completely and instead turning her back on her and looking at Mitch and Adam. Y/N notices how she leans her body into Harry a bit, her arm resting on the back of his chair again. If Harry notices, he’s oblivious to her motives. It almost makes Y/N laugh at how Harry’s ignoring her.
“Please,” Mitch nods, lifting his glass to finish off the rest of his beer. Y/N tries to hide her facial expression as she is impressed with how Mitch manages to gulp down the beer so fast, instead bringing her focus to her own drink - which she was looking forward to downing herself honestly.
She picks up a lime wedge and squeezes it over her glass, watching the juices squirt out and into her glass. After she stirs it with her straw, she brings it to her lips and gulps back nearly half of it. Y/N suddenly feels her phone buzzing in her jean pocket. She sits up slightly in order to slide it out of her pocket and looks at the screen. It’s Mark’s number again. Rolling her lips into her mouth, she declines the call and sets her phone screen down on the table before grabbing ahold of her drink again and having another sip. He sure has some nerve to continue to call numerous times, Y/N thinks as she zones out from whatever Harry and his friends were talking about.
“Y/N grew up in the city, actually,” Harry states. Y/N raises her eyebrows and looks around the table to see everyone’s looking at her now. She’s missed what they were talking about prior so she just spit balls it here and smiles.
“Um, yeah, born and raised,” she nods, “I noticed you all have quite a jumble of accents, where are you all from?” Y/N asks, looking towards Tom and Jenny as they begin to explain where they were separately from before meeting in London.
Harry watches Y/N while his friends speak, mostly because he already knows everything there is about their lives, but also because he likes watching Y/N. Taking in her small mannerisms like how she talks with her hands quite a lot, and how she rubs her ankles together under the table as she listens to Adam talk about his wife and kids back home. They all chat amongst themselves, making jokes and laughing too, for nearly thirty minute before Mitch and Adam are whisked away to the stage. Harry feels his chest bursting as he sits back and watches Y/N interact with his friends as if they are her own. He smiles when she looks his way, her cheeks howling as she sucks on the straw of her second drink - nearly finishing it while staring at him. Harry has to break the gaze as his thoughts run a different less innocent route, causing him to readjust how he’s sitting and clearing his throat just as the lead singer of the band introduces them.
“So, why aren’t you in the band?” Y/N asks as the beginning chords of their opening song play out. She’s leaning her elbow on the table, resting her head in the palm of her hand while turning her head to Harry - shutting out Jenny and Tom completely but they’re too busy watching the band to care.
“Bold of you to assume I have enough talent to be in a band,” Harry says with a smirk. Y/N rolls her eyes and reaches for her glass, bringing the straw between her lips and finishing off the tequila and soda water with three squeezed lime slices in it - Harry watched her prepare her drink both times, finding himself intrigued by her drink of choice.
“You are definitely talented enough,” Y/N says, “from the bit I’ve heard through the walls, you’re great with a guitar and I’m assuming I’m right considering that your job revolves around music.”
“Well, they already have a guitar player,” Harry notes, nodding his head towards Mitch who’s strumming away on his guitar. “And he’s one of the best in the business so if I did have any talent, he wipes me out without a question,” Harry insists.
Y/N is about to respond but then the band is starting to really get into the song. She turns her head, sitting up straight again, and watches the band perform. They’re really good, she thinks and starts to bob her head along to the song. Harry tries to not be obvious, but he stares at her for a few moments before facing the stage to watch his mates as well. He smiles as he watches her get into the music, nodding along with the bass line and tapping her foot to the drums. They’re performing one of Harry’s songs. He had written it a couple years back when he had finally settled into New York, hence the title ‘Ever Since New York’. He didn’t sell the song to any big artist, instead he kept it within his personal folder and when Mitch asked if his and Adam’s band could borrow it Harry said yes. It was one of the few personal songs he would let his friends borrow, others were too much of him to let someone else sing.
Y/N is seriously enjoying herself. The tequila has hit her, settling into her body with a constant buzz, and this band was so good. She’s shamelessly swaying her body in her chair and nodding her head back and forth with the beat. To be fair, so was everyone else at the table. Jenny matched her energy perfectly, even throwing an arm around her shoulders as the course of their third song picked up - Jenny knew the lyrics and sang along, causing the two of them to erupt into laughter afterwards. After Jenny turns her attention back to her husband, Y/N looks at Harry and notices him lightly singing along while bobbing his head too. She smiles and ends up watching him instead of the band for maybe a little too long. He turns his head and catches her stare, raising a brow but she just shakes her head and leans closer to him to ensure he can hear her before speaking.
“They’re really good,” she compliments, “like a lot better than some of the mainstream artists I’ve seen recently,” she adds on just as the band finishes up another song.
“Yeah, they are,” Harry nods in agreement, “but the bands really just a hobby for all of them since they are all involved within the industry already.”
“Oh, that’s sick though,” Y/N says, “not everyone’s hobby includes filling up a dive bar in New York City every weekend with people singing along to your songs,” she exclaims. She had looked around the room earlier during the last song to see it wasn’t just the bandmates' friends that knew the words to their songs. Majority of the people in the bar were singing too, clearly being regulars to their sets.
Amy arrives at their table again, setting down everyone's refills in a rush, thankfully being too busy to stop and flirt with Harry. Is that jealousy, Y/N? She questions herself in her head. She ignores her thoughts and brings her new drink to her lips, not even bothering with the lime slices this time as she’s feeling a bit drunk now and honestly could care less. As the band opens their next song with some strong drums and an incredible electric guitar melody, the crowd goes a bit crazy. Y/N furrows her brows and looks at the people at her table, Tom and Jenny are also hollering at the band while Harry is chuckling. He meets her eyes before echoing the crowd and cheering on his friends. Y/N’s eyes widen and she huffs out a laugh before she grabs her phone quickly and opens her Instagram.
Just in time, she opens her Instagram stories as the song picks up and the small crowd that had formed overtime at the front of the stage starts to dance around. Everyone is cheering and singing along, causing Y/N’s jaw to drop in pure amazement. She holds down the button to record and gets a quick ten second video of the band rocking out while the bar sings and goes nuts as the bass line played by Adam kicks in and their drummer flings his body around to play one of the most addicting beats they’ve played so far. Y/N shakes her head and swipes a filter on before tapping on the screen, turning to face Harry - who’s already watching her, of course.
“Does the band have an Instagram?” She asks. To which Harry just shrugs in response, because he really isn’t too sure - he’s not hugely into social media himself.
“They do!” Jenny says with excitement, Y/N turns in her seat and grins at Jenny as she spells out the bands Instagram handle. “I keep trying to get them to stay active on it but they barely do,” she states.
Y/N slips her drink that she holds in one hand and taps ‘post to story’ on her phone that in her other hand. “Well, they might get, like, a few notifications flood in since I tagged them in my story,” Y/N tells her.
“Oh yeah?” Jenny questions. “Are you big on Insta?”
“It’s kind of grown over the years, I just hit half a million last week actually,” Y/N states. Her words cause both Jenny and Tom’s jaws to drop. Suppose it’s quite a big number, Y/N thinks.
“That’s insane, oh my god,” Jenny says, “is social media like your job then?” She asks. Y/N notices how both Tom and Harry are more interested in hearing about her Instagram than the band’s next song, to be fair it is a slower tune, but still it shocks her a bit.
“Um, not really,” Y/N licks her lips, “I have a career at a fashion studio in the city, we style the city’s elite and some celebrities, do their personal shopping and all that. But the social media thing is really just a little add on, I guess,” Y/N explains, pausing a few times as she feels a bit nervous telling them about her following. Some people saw it as a clout thing, asking for shoutouts and tags so her followers would get their follower count up. While others thought it was childish and weird that she was kind of like an influencer in a way.
“Wow,” Harry says, his voice gets Y/N’s attention as she looks towards him now, “how didn’t I know this?” He questions with a chuckle.
“I don’t know,” Y/N shrugs, “it’s really just like a hobby, barely even that.”
“Like how the band is for Mitch and Adam,” Harry nods.
Y/N smiles and nods with him, “exactly.”
“You’re definitely the coolest girl Harry knows, by the way,” Jenny states, bringing Y/N’s attention back to her left where she sat. Y/N laughs and brushes her hair back over her shoulders.
“I don’t know about that,” Y/N disagrees and shakes her head, reaching for her drink again to take a few sips.
“No, you definitely are,” Harry corrects her, having a sip of his own drink as well. Y/N puts down her glass and smiles, shrugging her shoulders and leaning back into her seat.
“I mean, if you say so,” she says in a joking tone. Jenny, Tom and Harry all chuckle, which makes Y/N laugh along with them. The band is talking to the crowd now, mentioning that their weekly gig will not be happening next week due to the holidays. Then they’re explaining something about their next and final song, thanking the crowd before the song starts up.
“This was their first song as a band,” Tom tells Y/N. She smiles and nods, appreciating the insight from him.
The song is catchy, still fitting the bands vibe but definitely isn’t as good as some of the other songs they had played already. Y/N decides to take a final snap of the band on stage on her Instagram story. Mitch’s head is down, his hair falling forward that she can barely tell that it’s him, while Adam is grinning at the crowd which makes Y/N smile as she swipes on a filter to lighten the picture some and types out ‘new fave band alert’ as her caption, finding a red siren gif quickly before posting it to her story. As the song comes to an end the bar erupts into a roar of cheers. Y/N brings her hands to her mouth and hollers along with the bar, grinning as she watches the four boys of the band come together and bow. As they bend down Harry whistles, having both his hands at his mouth, to show his support to his friends.
Y/N widens her eyes and turns quickly to look at Harry, surprised by the loud whistle that came from him. He matches her look, widening his eyes and playing dumb as he slowly lowers his hands from his face. Y/N laughs, slapping a hand on his arm and leaning back, immensely entertained by his actions. Harry laughs along with Y/N till they both calm down and shake their heads. Just as Y/N is about to say something her phone starts to buzz on the table from an incoming call. She looks down at the screen and sees it’s Mark - again.
“Ugh,” Y/N groans and hits decline, unlocking her phone to go to her phone app. “How the hell do you block a phone number?” She asks aloud to no one in particular.
“Is it Mark?” Harry questions in a low voice, leaning towards Y/N to keep his words between them. Y/N frowns but nods her head once. The tequila in her system starts to mess with her, her screen becoming fuzzy as she thinks about all the crap she learnt about Mark earlier today. And now he was ruining her fun out with Harry and his friends.
“Where’s the bathroom?” Y/N asks, turning to Jenny since she would know the location of the women's bathroom over Harry.
“Down the hall in the back corner over there,” she points in that direction and before anyone else can say something Y/N is on her feet with her phone in hand and heading to the bathroom.
Harry looks over his shoulder as he monitors Y/N’s move across the bar. He’s worried about her, obviously, but he’s also watching to make sure no douche bag makes a grab for her. Although he is sure that she could handle it herself. As he turns back to the table he sees both Tom and Jenny staring at him. Harry furrows his brows and brings his drink to his lips, having the final sip of his third drink tonight. Jenny just shakes her head and looks down at her phone, he’s pretty sure she’s looking up Y/N’s Instagram. Tom’s still staring at Harry though.
“What?” Harry finally asks, setting his glass down with the few other empty ones at the centre of the table.
“So,” Tom pauses, “what’s going on here?” He questions, being annoyingly vague.
“What do you mean?” Harry asks, trying his hardest to not roll his eyes.
“Well you just show up with this bombshell of a woman, who is beyond anything you could’ve described her as by the way, and we’re all just supposed to forget she’s in a relationship?” Tom questions, tilting his head just slightly to the side as he stares down Harry.
“Firstly, I’m insulted you don’t think we could just be friends,” Harry says, he’s about to continue but Mitch and Adam join the table again. They get a round of ‘good job’ from everyone before Mitch is turning to Harry and furrowing his brows.
“What were you saying before?” He asks.
“That it is just possible for Y/N and I to be friends, but also not that it’s any of your guys business cause it’s not even mine, but her and her boyfriend broke up, like, recently,” Harry informs his friends, dragging his fingertip along the condensation of his empty glass in front of him. He feels silly, having to explain himself for simply bringing along a friend to hangout tonight. But he can’t deny it feels good to know that she is single now. Only to feel bad a second later as he knows that Y/N must be hurting, judging by her drowning herself in tequila drinks and getting upset over Mark calling her.
“Well, shit,” Mitch breathes out. Harry lifts his gaze to find his best mate with his usual smug look on his face. “What are you waiting for then, loverboy, make a move,” Mitch coaxes him.
“Did you not hear me when I said they broke up recently? As in maybe I should just let that settle for a while before I try and make any sort of move,” Harry says.
“Well if you don’t eventually and you let this one go, then you’re a bloody idiot,” Adam resorts, “Y/N is a prize, one evening knowing her and I understand your little crush, H,” he adds with a smile.
“Trust me,” Harry huffs out a breath and shakes his head a bit, “I’m well aware. But seriously guys, I’m just going to let it play out and not force anything. I’m happy to just be her friend, honestly,” he explains. Everyone nods, seeming to understand where Harry is at now with Y/N. Perfect timing, Amy shows up with refills for everyone to get the attention of the group off Harry.
“So, Harry,” Amy says after setting down everyone glasses, turning her body away from Jenny and the empty chair for Y/N to completely face him - her boobs practically in his face. He gives her a polite smile, leaning back in his chair in order to get some distance from her. “Who’s this new girl you brought with you? A cousin or something?” She asks, her body seeming to lean even further towards him as she speaks.
Harry opens his mouth, ready to let Amy know her ridiculous assumptions were wrong. When he hears Y/N’s voice from behind where Amy stood. “Classy,” she mutters under her breath.
Amy rolls her eyes rather dramatically before she turns away from Harry and looks at Y/N as she’s pulling out her chair and returning to her seat. “What did you say?” Amy asks, her voice rather snarky in Y/N’s opinion.
“I said, wow you’re hair colour, it’s like, so classy, I love it,” Y/N resorts, putting on a smile just as fake as her words.
Amy’s lips part, her eyes narrowing at Y/N’s bored stare. Whatever bitchy response she has lined up for Y/N is cut short as Amy’s name is being yelled by the bartender. Her gaze falls behind Y/N, looking at who had called for her, before she meets Y/N’s eyes again. She glares again, huffs out a short breath, and then is nearly stomping away from the table like a child who didn’t get the Barbie doll she wanted to play with - or rather the Ken doll. Y/N’s lips turn up slightly into a smug smile as a feeling of pride flushes over her.
“Yup, it’s official,” Jenny says, bringing Y/N back to reality as she looks away to her left. Jenny is grinning as she brings an arm around Y/N’s shoulder, pulling her into her side. “You’re one hundred percent the coolest girl Harry knows,” she states, earning a round of laughter from the group.
“You handled Amy like a pro,” Adam notes, then jutting his chin towards Harry, “H is always too nice to let her know how annoying she’s being.”
Y/N smiles and looks at Harry in the corner of her eye, noticing the slight tint of pink upon his cheeks. She flips her hair over her shoulder and shrugs, “I grew up dealing with the snobby Upper East Side kids, Amy is harmless, believe me,” Y/N ensures the group before grabbing for her drink and sucking back a few good gulps.
The group around the table begins to talk about the performance, compliments and praises to Mitch and Adam all around of course. Even a few strangers come up to give them a pat on the back and ask for a picture. They’re like royalty in this dingy little bar.
Y/N is enjoying sitting back and simply being around people, letting herself push away any thoughts of Mark. She had blocked his number while she waited in line for the washroom, then responded to Sammy’s million texts asking where she was and with who - when she told him she was with Harry he just replied with ‘#TeamHarry for the win’, which she rolled her eyes at but ended up smiling down at her phone and texting him a thumbs up back.
When Y/N finished with her business in the rather dirty washroom - the sink barely even worked, it was not ideal - and she saw Amy at the table beside Harry again, Y/N let her jealousy fly. Then when Amy started leaning so far into Harry that her boobs nearly touched his chest, Y/N just couldn’t help it. It was like her vision turned red suddenly, her chest swelling up as she tried to bite down on her tongue. But she couldn’t, she was too annoyed by Amy’s less than classy actions towards her customer.
“Hey,” Harry’s low voice snaps Y/N out of her own world. She blinks and focuses on him, feeling herself melt at the sight of his smile. “Are you okay?” He asks, more than likely referring to her quick departure to the bathroom after Mark called.
“Yeah,” she assures him with a smile and a nod. “I blocked his number, I don’t want to hear his excuses. I could really care less,” she explains to Harry. He nods in response and is about to say something else, about how Mark is a real idiot for whatever he did to hurt her. But Y/N sits up, places a hand on his arm that was resting on the table between then, and gives him another smile. “But enough about him, seriously, I’m feeling a little drunk and having way too much fun here with you to be bothered anymore,” Y/N tells him.
“Alright,” Harry smiles, peering at Y/N as his heart beats wildly in his chest. He’s pretty sure his skin’s tingling from where her hand rests. But it doesn’t last long before she moves, reaching for her glass - that she then raises into the air.
“I would like to make a toast,” Y/N announces to the table, gaining everyone’s attention and smiles, “to Mitch and Adam’s absolutely amazing performance, new friends, and to having a lovely holiday season,” Y/N beams as Harry and his friends cheer in agreement and everyone lifts their glasses into the air.
The group ends up buying shots after, then another round of drinks, and then more shots. Y/N is laughing so much her stomach hurts. She hasn’t been this happy while enjoying others' company in far too long, outside of work of course. Harry makes another joke, teasing Adam, but Adam dishes it back right away. Y/N finds herself letting her hand slip to Harry’s thigh as she throws her head back with laughter at Adam’s absurd comment. Everyone else is too focused on the banter to notice, but Harry does of course. He’s breath hitches in his throat as he feels her delicate fingers spread over his thigh. He gulps, unsure if he wants to break whatever drunken trance that Y/N may be in. Does she realize that she’s put her hand on his thigh? He wonders. But his thoughts are quickly answered as she caresses her thumb along his pants before lifting her hand slowly off of him altogether.
Y/N’s leaning on her elbow again, her chin propped up in the palm of her hand as she looks at Harry. He’s so hot, her drunk self thinks as she watches his Adam's apple bob up and down for a second time since she had placed her hand on his thigh. It happened by accident to be honest, but she wasn’t sorry about it. God, she was just itching to touch Harry. His thigh, his arm, maybe rub gentle circles on the back of his neck as he talked amongst his friends, but she wanted to touch his lips more than anything. She couldn’t stop looking at his pretty pink lips as he replies to whatever whoever said to him.
Harry catches Y/N’s glossy eyes staring at him in the corner of his eye. He rolls his lips into his mouth to stop himself from smiling. He likes how she can’t seem to keep her eyes off of him, because he does the same thing maybe a little too often. Harry turns his head and meets her gaze, giving her a smirk as she playfully narrows her eyes at him. Her cheeks are rosy from the amount of liquor she’s consumed, while her eyes truly are a bit glossed over from her being more than tipsy. She’s so hot, he thinks, as his eyes shamelessly roam over her appearance. Even hours later at this shitty bar and she still looks breathtaking. Harry’s gaze lingers a little too long on her chest, admiring the way the top fit her breasts; was she wearing a bra? Oh how he wishes he could find out.
Y/N adjusts her position in her chair, letting her left arm fall into her lap while she lays her right arm beside Harry’s. She is liking this game they seem to be playing with their eyes. She sits up straight, knowingly sticking out her chest just a bit as she watches Harry’s eyes fall to her breasts. But she keeps it classy, of course, unlike some people. Y/N lets out a breathy sigh as she looks at Harry’s hand mere inches away from her right hand. Those rings, she thinks, they could do some real damage. Her thighs clench involuntarily, her mind falling into a fog as she imagines them leaving red marks on her bare bottom or how cool they would feel against her throat.
“I really like your rings, have I told you that before?” Y/N’s voice is hoarse, but she doesn’t care as her pinky reaches over to touch the large gold ‘S’ that rests on his pinky. The metal is cool to her touch, just as she imagines. Feeling brave - thanks to her good friend, tequila - she lifts her hand slightly in order to comfortably drag her fingertip over the ‘S’ shape a couple times.
“No, you-” Harry clears his throat, feeling it become dry at the sight of her doe eyes staring at his fingers. His mind goes somewhere dirty, thinking of somewhere else his fingers could go. Tangled in her hair, wrapped around her throat, inside of her. Harry licks his lips before he speaks again, “you haven’t, but thank you.”
“Which is your favourite?” Y/N questions, her finger still lazily tracing the ring on his pinky finger.
“Quite like the inicals,” Harry answers, smirking as she glances up to peer at him through her lashes. She mirrors his smug look easily.
“A very narcissistic answer,” Y/N hums, teasing him. Harry playfully narrows his eyes at her, which she returns but ends up giggling after a moment as he sticks out his tongue at her. These inappropriate thoughts have got to just slide away for a moment, Y/N thinks with a deep breath.
“We’re going to head out,” Tom announces to the table suddenly, helping Jenny out of her chair. Jenny’s beautiful dazzling smile is on her husband as he helps her into her coat. They’ve both had quite a bit to drink too and Harry notes how Jenny latches onto Tom’s side after they’re in their coats.
“I’m still shocked you two both came out tonight,” Harry says.
“We paid big bucks for this babysitter, so they better keep it together for at least another four hours,” Tom exclaims with a wink. Jenny gasps and smacks her husband on the chest as she realizes what Tom is insinuating.
“Don’t go acting like you last longer than ten minutes, bud,” Mitch taunts jokingly to his friend. Everyone laughs as Tom glares at Mitch across the table. Y/N covers her mouth with her hands, finally bringing her finger away from where it laid on Harry’s ‘S’ ring, in order to cover her chuckles.
“It was so lovely to meet you, Y/N,” Jenny gushes, letting go of Tom in order to put her arms around Y/N and hugging her tightly.
Y/N smiles into her bleached hair, squeezing her back just as tightly, “you too, Jenny,” she says.
“Don’t let H keep hiding you away now,” she says, pointing a stern finger at the two of them. Harry laughs and shakes his head at his friend.
“Wouldn’t dream of it, Jenny,” he tells her.
Then they’re all saying goodbye to the couple as they walk out of the half empty bar. Y/N glances around the place, noticing how it feels less scary now. Maybe it was the tequila that helped, or how comfortable she felt around Harry and his friends. A yawn suddenly makes it’s way past Y/N’s lips, she brings the back of her hand to cover it but ends up squinting her eyes closed as her whole body feels drained. She meets Harry eyes after the yawning stops, he shows her a small soft smile that makes her return it right back.
“Ready to go home?” He asks. She contemplates it for a moment, because she truthfully doesn’t want the night to end. But she decides to not fight it and nods to Harry.
Harry does practically the same thing as Tom just had. He announces his and Y/N’s departure, helps her into her coat, and lets her say her goodbyes as Adam opens his arms up for a big warm hug. Mitch only nods, waving to them both before Harry leads the way out of the bar. The cold night air blasts Y/N’s hair back, the sharp wind taking her by surprise as she blinks back tears from the cold. She puts both her hands into her coat pockets and zips it up all the way, snuggling into the warmth it will provide her on their walk home.
“I feel like Mitch doesn’t like me much,” Y/N admits after a few minutes of comfortable silence between her and Harry.
“What?” Harry shakes his head, eyebrows pinched together. “No, that’s just how he is. He’s quiet and looks all moody. Give him some time, he’ll warm up, promise.”
“I think he’s just protective of you,” Y/N says, looking up at Harry after they cross the road, “thinks I’m a threat or something.”
Harry chuckles and shakes his head again,“well, it’s definitely not like that with Mitch and I, plus he’s seeing someone. Her name’s Sarah, she plays drums on a lot of tracks we write.”
“If you say so,” Y/N sighs. She looks around at the sights before them. A few other mildly drunk people wander the streets, and she notices a few homeless people too, that tore Y/N’s heart apart, as they were bunkering down in the alleyways. Harry keeps pace with Y/N the whole walk home, letting her control the speed they walked and what they talked about. She would jump from subject to subject the entire time, but Harry thought it was kinda cute that she was so drunk she didn’t even realize how quickly she changed the topic.
And all too soon, they’re in the elevator in their apartment building. Harry presses the number six button and joins Y/N on the back wall. They both lean into the railing, comfortable silence falling between them once again. But it was obviously their thoughts were anything but silent. The elevator doors open on their floor, and Harry lets her walk out first as always.
“Well this is me,” Y/N says dramatically as she approaches her apartment door. Harry chuckles under his breath, shaking his head slightly and letting his eyes fall to the floor for a second before meeting Y/N’s stare again. “I really did have a great time tonight, Harry,” she tells him.
“I’m glad, I did too,” he agrees.
Y/N wants to kiss him. She really really really does. But they’re both a little drunk, and she literally just broke up with Mark yesterday - or maybe technically two days ago now since it’s past midnight. But it didn’t matter, she didn’t want to be that girl. Plus she wanted to really get to know Harry and take this slow and see where it went. That didn’t stop her gaze from falling to his pretty pink lips though. Harry’s thoughts are running laps too. He wants to kiss her. But he knows she’s more than likely still hasn’t recovered fully emotionally from her break up Mark, hell not even ten hours ago she was crying because of her shitty ex boyfriend. Didn’t mean he couldn’t stop thinking about kissing her though, especially when her gaze falls to his lips.
Just as quickly as they seemed to fall into some dream like state as thoughts of kissing each other float around them, they snap back to reality. Y/N blinks a few times and takes a step back, bumping into her front door. Harry clears his throat and steps back as well, towards his own front door.
“Polar Express,” Y/N says suddenly, earning a look of confusion from Harry. “We’re watching the Polar Express tomorrow, and you’re going to play me something on that guitar of yours.”
Harry lets out a chuckle and gives Y/N a smirk, “yeah, we’ll see about that.”
“You will,” she singsongs as she focuses on unlocking her door. It takes a few extra tries to get the key in but once she does she unlocks it and opens the door.
“Goodnight, Y/N,” Harry smiles.
“Goodnight, H,” Y/N says softly, smiling as well, as she leans against her door to look back at him. Harry’s smile deepens at her using his nickname. She must’ve picked it up from his friends using it earlier during their time at the bar.
She gives him one last look over, knowing very well that she’s going to dream about him in that cream and blue plaid jacket - and maybe only wearing that jacket - before she shuts her door and presses her back against it as it closes. Today was a lot. But she’s beyond grateful that Harry invited her out, introducing her to his wildly unique group of wonderful friends, and letting her get a little bit drunk too. Her chest flares up as she remembers their close moment at the bar, her touching his rings, placing her hand on his thigh-
“Oh god,” Y/N all but moans out as her thoughts go right back to the place they were at before.
She shakes her head and heads to her bedroom. Harry wouldn’t be able to hear a vibration from the other side of the wall, would he? Y/N shrugs and opens her bedside table drawer to grab her vibrator, knowing just how much she needed it tonight as she imagined Harry’s hand between her thighs. Fuck, she’s so screwed, she thinks, biting her lip as she realizes, she really really really likes Harry.
>> part four <<
thanks for reading, please reblog/leave some feedback if you enjoyed it! until next week 😘
*like this post if you’d like to be added to the cstsyl taglist!*
#harry styles writing#harry styles x reader#harry styles x you#harry styles fanfiction#harry styles#harry styles fanfic#harry styles fluff#harry styles smut#harry styles angst#harry styles imagine#harry styles imagines#harry styles concept#harry styles one shot#1dff#cstsyl#omg this took me so long i know but i really really like it and hope u guys to do!!
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do you have any gx rivalshipping hcs!! im super curious on your take of them :]
When I saw this ask my immediate reaction was thinking: "Yes, I have an excuse to talk about gx rivalshipping, YES."
So yeah. I love this ship a lot, like a whole damn lot and it's a little hard to explain why, especially when gx has so many open possibilities for romances involving Judai. By which I mean two, really, and Manjoume is not one of them (sadly for me). I am referring to Yubel and Johan, by the way, I refuse to acknowledge Asuka as a love interest.
I'll start off with a bit of fluff headcanons?
Manjoume thinks Winged Kuriboh is really cute and that its friendly and fluffy appearance screams Judai, in a way. But he will never admit it because of what that might imply for him and the Ojamas.
Manjoume is fueled by caffeine and monster, he only really starts to recognise how nice it can be to have a meal because of how much Judai enjoys his food. He tries to sit at the table with him with dumb excuses.
Judai feels a bit guilty for how his actions impacted Manjoume's life, but Manjoume generally tells him that it's fine, it's better this way, that he's never this happy, that the only reason why Judai should maybe feel bad about it is because of his tendency to get overly invested in other people's problems and getting hurt in the process. Judai responds with bear hugs.
Manjoume brags about Judai a lot, actually.
"Oh you think that's cool? One time Judai managed to do a backflip, you loser."
"Slifer reds suck, but they do have redeeming qualities, by which I mean one of them is actually good."
Judai likes to indulge himself in the thought that he's Manjoume's most trusted, that he's the only one who could ever be allowed to have that many incriminating pictures of him. Because Judai just loves taking candid pictures of Manjoume. He thinks he looks and and cool in every situation, so yeah. A part of him does it because he has an inexplicable fear of forgetting people and the way they look, but he just can't say why that is.
They hang out in silence a lot, but once they start talking they just never stop. You'll find them on the beach at 3 am with a smiling Manjoume listening to Judai go on about how crazy it is that you can fry food in so many different ways and how he once caught a butterfly as a kid and named it Kujaku.
They share their music a lot, so Manjoume's tastes switch from just emo to fast paced rap and the weirdly happy sounding songs about very morbid things Judai listens to (plus emo). Judai starts to enjoy a bit of angry screaming into microphones thanks to Jun. Do they sing along like idiots as they share earphones? Yes. Is Manjoume mesmerised by Judai's singing voice? Also yes.
Judai loves hiking and sometimes invites Manjoume, but because he's a lot weaker and has less stamina, they take it slow. Manjoume keeps cursing himself for being slow and dead weight, but Judai is just happy to have a companion. Admittedly, going slower makes the walks better as he has the time to enjoy the scenery properly. He never teases Jun about his lack of physical training.
Now... I wanted to talk about my general view on the ship, plus headcanons I guess, but this is going to be EVEN LONGER (you are getting more than you asked for, your fault for enabling me, really). For the sake of the sanity of mobile users, I'm adding a cut so nobody has to unwillingly scroll through endless text.
On to the the juice, then. My thoughts on the ship.
Manjoume and Judai are, of course, the rivals of the series and, if my thoughts on rivalry weren't clear enough, I am one of those people. It's just really romantic to me.
What is very interesting about the two of them specifically is that they are polar opposites in the way the reason why they play, throughout the whole series. Hell, their views end up getting reversed completely: Manjoume goes from "if I don't win I'm gonna have a breakdown breakdown" to "losing is ok, as long as I enjoy the game and am true to myself", while Judai does the 180 from "I really just love playing cards with my friends, who cares about the outcome, it's fun" to "I have card game related trauma, nobody speak to me, games are only an excuse to assert a sort of power scale and honestly fuck that".
Manjoume is sort of the only person in the 'friend group' (he's never actually part of it, sadly, literally only Judai and Fubuki like him) to not idolise Judai, not explicitly. He clearly has an admiration for Judai from the beginning, but he is adamant on expressing it as hatred towards for being better than him. A part of me feels that a lot of his superior act is meant to try and fool himself and Jaden into thinking that he's a worthy rival, because I know for a fact that Manjoume doesn't believe that. He wants it to be true, yes.
What I am trying to get at is that Judai is probably a little confused by the fact that Manjoume doesn't drool all over him like the rest of the school does, but it soon becomes a crutch. Judai is under a lot of pressure because he is the hero who will save everyone and people like to remind him of how much they count on him. Manjoume is in it for Judai. He wants to be acknowledged by him, he wants his recognition and his attention, but he never asks for help or expects Judai to fix his problems for him. Judai is probably thankful for that.
Manjoume is also really scared of being left behind and cast aside as soon as he stops being useful and that's exactly what the writers do to him!!! hooray!, but Judai keeps insisting that he's not a bad guy, that he's fun to be around, that he's competent. Manjoume doesn't really believe all that that much, but Jaden keeps playing him despite his repeated losses and to Jun that's the equivalent of someone kissing his tears away. Manjoume only learns to accept his losses and shortcomings because Judai did it for him first.
So basically Manjoume is the only one who fully sees Judai as a person, while Judai is the only one who is really willing to look past his pretentious facade. I fully believe that Judai was relieved to learn that Manjoume was not just a perfect boy with perfect manners, by the way. They both just love to learn about every imperfection that the other has and silently thinking that they just add to the beauty of the other's character. Will they tease eachother about it? Fuck yes. Do they feel awful when the other tries to fix something about themselves because they pointed it out? Also fuck yes.
They are in a dumb competition against themselves to be better in order to earn the right to be friends with eachother, but because they are fucking dumb they never actually communicate (until they do), so for a long time it's endless pining that is definitely not gay because admittedly Judai just doesn't think that dating is a thing, while Manjoume is straight™, really straight. He has never liked a boy in his life, he's so very fucking straight, I swear.
So Manjoume is a bisexual disaster (and in my headcanon he prefers boys, actually, the Asuka incident is the biggest example of denial™ ever. He prefers Fubuki, fight me over this).
The problem is that he never really considered he might be crushing on Judai, but at the same time admitting to maybe liking boys too means that there was more to wanting to stay at DA, to hanging out with Judai's crew despite their mutual dislike, to his continuous playful headlocks and ear pulling. To add onto that, there is probably a certain amount of guilt over having betrayed that bond with Judai by trying to throw away his cards and everything.
Judai, on the other hand... is confused at how bothered he is by the public declarations of love, because Manjoume is his rival and rivals are supposed to focus on eachother, not on some girl, no matter how good said girl is at card games.
So maybe they are a bit gay for eachother. And maybe they just want excuses to be together as much as possible. And it's really just the vibe of highschool romance between two people who don't want to admit to caring for one another on a deeper level, but are also weirdly possessive of eachother for no apparent reason.
And I think I'll stop here with my gay retelling, but really if you look at the two of them you do see that they do a lot for eachother's characters. It's kind of beautiful, really. They are the two socially inept characters who find comfort in someone being just like them and understanding them as they change and grow up.
I have a lot to say about how that changes once the transfer students come in, but I think I've bored everyone for long enough- as in nobody will read this lol.
That's ok.
I thank you again for the ask and for allowing me to gush about this ship that is so close to my heart. If anyone ever wants to talk about them, just. Do. Break into my house at night and I still won't mind, I just want to talk about them.
#shut me up#i'm so sorry#i started and i couldn't stop#i also didn't want to be disappointing by giving an half-assed response#i've thought about this ask all night#i still improvised the whole thing and i'm sure you can tell#yugioh#ygo#yugioh gx#ygo gx#gx rivalshipping#manjoume jun#jun manjoume#chazz princeton#yuki judai#judai yuki#jaden yuki
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