Aizawa: So from what I’ve been told, the body swap quirk will last about a day or two.
Izuku, in Bakugo’s body: Well, that’s not too long.
Bakugo, in Izuku’s body: SPEAK FOR YOURSELF, NERD!
Aizawa: Just calm down, do you two have any advice for each other to avoid any issues?
Bakugo: Tch, stay away from hot places, nerd. You’ll make my quirk go off by accident.
Izuku: Uhhh, oh. If you hear seven dead people talking to you at night, just ignore them.
Aizawa and Bakugo:
Bakugo: What?
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Bakugou: *laying on the floor*
Kirishima: so… Midoriya said he liked you?
Bakugou: yeah
Kirishima: and you… asked him to marry you…?
Bakugou: yeah
Kirishima: did he freak out?
Bakugou: I don’t know. I ran away before I scared him away even more
*meanwhile*
Deku, bursting into the dorms: GUYS HOLY SHIT I’M GETTING MARRIED
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Izuku: Do you think that the universe brought us together on purpose? Do you think we were always meant to be soulmates?
Katsuki: Oh my god shut up and go to bed! We have our hero certification test in the morning you damn nerd!
Katsuki:
Katsuki: *whispers* but yeah, fine, we're soulmates ok? Don't make it weird.
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Shoto: What’s a himbo?
Mina: Beefy, stupid, and kind, like Kirishima
Shoto: What if they’re just beefy and kind?
Mina: That’s a hunk, like Iida
Shoto: Kind, but stupid?
Mina: That’s just a decent man
Shoto: Kaminari?
Mina: Yes.
Shoto: What about Bakugo?
Mina: Beefy, but mean. That’s a jock.
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Aizawa: Did you have to stab him?
Midoriya: You weren't there, you didn't hear what he said to me.
Aizawa: What did he say?
Midoriya: He said, 'what are you going to do, stab me?'
Bakugou: To be fair, I would have stabbed me, too.
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Izuku: Sometimes I wonder if I piss Kacchan off by calling him 'Kacchan'. Do you think he hates it when I do that?
Uraraka: *rolling her eyes* I'm pretty sure he would've told you if that was the case.
*Meanwhile*
Katsuki: I'M BAKUGO KACCHAN! THAT'S RIGHT, I'M IZUKU'S KACCHAN AND I'LL FINISH YOU OFF, YOU FUCKING EXTRA!
Villain: ...
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Izuku: Based on statistical evidence, I am l l immortal.
Iida : .. elaborate?
Izuku: I haven't died yet
Iida: that's not how it works-
Bakugo: Have you seen the shit he does? He just won't die
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BakuDeku: I can fix him.
TodoBaku: I can make him worse.
ShinBaku: there's something deeply wrong with him and I want to be around when the car crash inevitably happens.
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Bakugou: How long do I have left?
Recovery girl: A month at best, but on the bright side, you’re lucky that you have these moments.
Recovery girl, gesturing to the other bed: Izuku Midoriya here is going to die in three days.
Bakugou, to Izuku: You think you’re better than me?! Think you can beat me?! Watch!
Recovery girl: HE’S FLATLINING
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Quirkless Analyst! Izuku AU
Izuku: You know there are 42 different ways that Chargebolt can be killed in battle if he didn’t practice long-distance attacks?
Bakugo, just woke up and eating cereal:
Bakugo: I thank God everyday you didn’t decide to take the villain path.
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Endeavour: What's wrong?
Midoriya: I'm in love with an insane blond who is completely out of my league.
Endeavour:
Endeavour: Well, that's embarrassingly relatable.
Shinsou: Yup.
Midoriya:
Midoriya: We should start a support club.
Aizawa, creating a groupchat: Way ahead of you.
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Deku: we should play spin the bottle! I’ll go first
Deku: well haha looks like I have to kiss Kacchan
Mina: but you didn’t even spin the bottle—
Bakugou: shut the fuck up Pinky, rules are rules
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Izuku: Kacchan, hi!! Kirishima said that you have something cool to show me!?
Katsuki: *wordlessly holds up his hands to show Izuku*
Izuku: YOU PAINTED YOUR NAILS GREEN!?
Katsuki: I painted my fucking nails green.
Izuku: This is the nicest thing anyone's ever done for me *tearing up, hugs Katsuki*
Katsuki: *Grumbling* Whatever. (He's thrilled that Izuku likes his nails)
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*The Squad is on a hike*
Uraraka: It’s beautiful out here.
Todoroki: And quiet.
Kaminari: Too quiet.
Kirishima: Did we lose someone?
*cut to Bakugo with a bear in a headlock and Izuku ready to fight*
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