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mee-op · 2 years

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this was what happened right

#obey me #om #om!#omswd #obey me swd #obey me crack #obey me incorrect quotes #om crack #om! crack #om incorrect quotes #om! incorrect quotes #omswd crack #omswd incorrect quotes #obey me swd crack

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tsukii0002 · 8 days

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Mc: Remember when I told you about my period?

The brothers: ...

Mc: And how it was recommended that for those days there should always be chocolate and hot water bags because it helped me and gave me comfort?

Satan: Yes, we remember it...

Mc: And remember that I told you so you would not be caught off guard?

Belphie: Yeah...

Mc: Well *taking a breath*, it's time for us to talk about YOUR periods.

Mammon: We do not have periods!!!

Mc: *slamming the table* Periods, heats, mating time…. Call it what you want but it's time to talk about it!!!!

Levi: *very flushed* But...

Mc: But nothing!! I'm tired of waking up in nests in random places in the house time to time!!!! It's not nice to wake up with feathers in my mouth!!!!!

Lucifer:*blushing*...

Mc: I would also like to be prepared in case I find any animal corpses at the foot of the bed!!! I appreciate the thought but I am human!!!! I don't need you to show me that you can get resources!!!! That's what supermarkets are for!!

Satan: *dodging the gaze*

Mc: And it would really be nice to know when you produce pheromones, that would have avoided me a lot of problems in RAD.

Asmo: Ha, ha *nervous laughter*

Mc: Or to know when to prepare myself to wake up in a cave dug in the garden or underwater.

Beel: ...

Levi: ...

Mc: And it would not be bad to know that during your period you are showing your demonic forms, I almost had four heart attacks the first time I saw your eyes glowing in the dark Mammon!!!

Mammon: That was an accident...

Mc: *enumerating with their fingers* Or that your sleep schedule changes, or that you don't sleep at all, or that your temperature changes, or that some of you become non-verbal, or that your wings produce a specific sound as a call…

Lucifer: Enough *massaging his temples while blushing* It has become clear.

Mc: You didn't think that, as a human living with seven demons, I should know these things???

Mammon: We didn't think you would notice...

Mc: *looking at him exceptionally* Mammon, my dear, last time you brought me a cocatrix egg because it glowed.

The brothers: ...

Mc: This is my last warning! Either we talk and set schedules or I take Solomon and Luke and go live somewhere else.

The brothers: !!!!

Satan: *whispering* Why only Solomon and Luke?

Asmo: *also whispering* Mc has given this same talk to Lord Diavolo, Barbatos and Simeon….

Mc: *taking out a notebook* So stop behaving like a pubescent teenager and tell me how your periods are going and if I can help you in any way.

Lucifer: Okay, you win…but this is not like your period.

Mammon: It's not fair!!! It's not like we can avoid it

Levi: *covering his face* This is going to be worse than a public exhibition…

Asmo: Well, at least this way we won't have to hide it….

Satan: *sighing* Will it really do any good?

Beel: *worried* It won't be a problem for Mc?

Belphie: … Well, I do want them to spoil me on my period.

The brothers: Belphie!!!!

Mc: *holding back laughter* That's the spirit.

.

I would like to write more extensive headcanons about it in the future 😊

Part 1 Part 2

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temis-de-leon · 11 days

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MC deadass writes with hooves.

They grab a pen with hooves and just do stacks of homework.

I don't even do my homework and I have fingers.

MC walks, eats, messages and writes with fucking hooves.

#obey me #obey me! shall we date?#om! shall we date #om! swd #obey me mc #obey me shitpost #obey me crack #sheep mc #obey me sheep mc

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hopeluna-archived · 10 months

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Thinking about......Solomon who randomly gives your cheek a small lick just to see that disgusted expression of yours as you look at him while frantically wiping your cheek with your hand, and then wiping your hand on his sleeve with mumbles of "ew ew ew ew ew".

All while he has a shit-eating grin on his face, watching you question your entire relationship with him.

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certifiedlucifersimp · 11 months

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Lucifer : Why is MC sitting on your shoulders?

Diavolo : They like to feel tall!

MC : *happy sheep noises*

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mammonsrockstargf · 26 days

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So we’ve all seen the posts on MC telling the brothers absurd lies about humans and just letting them believe it right?

Hear me out here: making the brothers watch the entirety of “Cunk on Earth” and just letting them believe that it is a 100% factual show.

—

"When are you evolving skin made of bricks?" Belphie mumbles into your skin, pulling you closer. “What?” you ask, still sleepy from your nap. “You know, what the lady said. About the brick skin,” you stir slightly, remembering that tonights episode had mentioned it. “Oh yeah,” you say. “I think it’s gonna be another thirty years or so,” you say, running your fingers through his hair. “Why?”

Belphegor opens his eyes for approximately three seconds and gives you a bleary-eyed look. “I was jus’ thinkin’” he mumbles and snuggles deeper into the cushions. “It’s gonna be really inconvenient to cuddle when you’re made of bricks,”

—

"Isn’t it crazy that nineteen out of twenty people are criminals?” Satan mumbles to Asmodeus, while sorting through his books, looking for a particular one. Asmodeus shrugs while filing his nails. “I don’t know, seems pretty accurate to me.”

—

"What are these?" Solomon asks looking at the bag of eggs Mammon has placed in front of him. He looks up at the demon with furrowed brows. "Eggs," Mammon says as a matter of fact and pushes the basket closer to the baffled wizard. "May I ask why?" Solomon says and pushes the basket back to Mammon again.

“They're human money? It’s to pay for my debt," Mammon states. “You’ve really forgotten how things work in the human world, old man.” Mammon laughs, walking away and leaving a very confused Solomon with a basket full of eggs.

—

"Thank Diavolo, Charles Darwin invented evolution. I'd hate it if you were a fossil." Leviathan says one night when you’re playing video games in his room. You let out a surprised giggle, which causes your fingers to slip on the controller. Leviathan stares at the big red “game over” on the screen as you apologize profusely, while simultaneously choking on your own laughter.

“Actually never mind, I want Darwin to reverse evolution again.”

—

"Santa came to visit every Christmas from when I was 3 years old till I was like 14," you say and look up when you feel a sudden change in the air. Lucifer is looking at you worriedly and places a hand on your thigh. "Wow, wanna talk about it?" he asks and your brows furrow. "It's not that serious, is it really?" you say and Lucifer shakes his head, making a tsk sound. "Typical humans, always downplaying their emotions," he says and pulls you towards him, causing you to tumble into his lap. He pats your head. "Being visited by a home intruder must have been really difficult for you," he says and you blink, remembering Philomena Cunk referring to Santa as "the world's most popular home intruder".

"Oh yeah, I guess it was kind of hard," you lie, internally dying as Lucifer coos at you.

—

"What are they doing?" Solomon asks, sitting down beside you. You look up from your homework to the two demons saying nonsense at each other.

"Katze!"

"Genau!"

"I don't know, you can ask them," you say and return to your homework, leaving the wizard to deal with the two idiots. "Hey, what's going on?" Solomon calls out and Beelzebub and Belphegor's heads snap towards you. Beelzebub's lips curl into a smile and he shrugs nonchalantly. Belphegor rolls his eyes.

"We're speaking the code language that MC taught us," Belphegor drawls and Solomon looks at you. You grin at him. "Yeah, it's called German,"

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bite-sized-devil · 1 year

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Lucifer: "MC, I've invited you here for two reasons. Do you know what they are?"

MC: *Looking sideways* "Haven't the foggiest."

Lucifer: "Fine, No. 1 you cannot just throw a marble on the ground in front of all of us and announce that whoever has it at the end of the night can make love to you."

MC: "I don't think I said the words 'make love'."

Lucifer: "My apologies, 'fuck you'."

MC: *Smirking*

Lucifer: "Levi gave Mammon a broken nose, Asmo is sobbing on the couch because Belphie scratched his face."

MC: "Okay sorry, I won't do it again."

Lucifer: "Thank you."

MC: "Sooo, what was the second thing?"

Lucifer: *Smirking while holding up the marble*

MC: "Oh."

Thank you so much for reading, I hope you liked it ☺️ Likes, comments, and reblogs are so appreciated! 🌻 Please don't repost, that shit won't fly here. I'll annoy the absolute shit out of you 😇 If you would like to join the tag list please fill in my dumb little form.

Tagging: @delphi-dreamin @blackwings-with-angeleyes @ladyofthemorningstar @alexxavicry @not-a-cat-lawyer @aprilwallflower @your-next-daydream @sassykattery

#obey me!#obey me #obey me shall we date #obey me fandom #om!#om! shall we date #obey me mc #om! mc #obey me lucifer #obey me script #obey me shitpost #obey me crack #obey me simp #obey me! lucifer #om! lucifer #om lucifer #obey me! shall we date?#om! swd #Saadie's Scripts 🌻

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l3viat8an · 11 months

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MC:*Cocking a nerf gun and pointing it at Lucifer*

Lucifer:*Not looking up from his paperwork* Must you?

MC: I Must.

Lucifer: I understand. Fire at will.

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zephyrchama · 2 months

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MC sneaks into everyone's bedrooms in the middle of the night and paints their horns homestuck candy corn colors for a fun April Fool's day surprise.

#how mad do you think they are #they dont even know what homestuck is. lucifers like “mc i cant believe youve done this.”#“luci you cant stop the homestuck” [uses levitation magic to skateboard into the sky]#obey me #obey me!#obey me swd #obey me crack #obey me scenario #obey me shall we date #obey me memes #omswd #obey me headcanon #omswd headcanon #obey me scenarios

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akurui-shizen7 · 1 year

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Diavolo, going over [MC]'s resume: Okay, so right here, it states that you’re creative.

[MC]: Yes

Diavolo: Okay... may I know what you create

[MC]: Problems.

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devildomresidentt · 4 months

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I love the idea that all of the brothers can turn into their Representative Animals at will, and I’m 100% sure Belphie abuses this power the most 😭😭

Like just imagine you walk into the HOL Living room and the first thing you see is a big ass Cow slumped over in the middle of the floor while everyone else sits in silence minding their own as if this is entirely normal to them?!

And if you ask anyone of them what the hell is going on they’ll simply say, “Don’t mind Belphie, he’s just trying to get out of dish duty”

Because of course he’d rather turn himself into a damn near 4,500 pound Cow than wash 2 forks and a couple of bowls…

#DAMN THAT LAZY BASTARD #and you best belive he’ll stay that way until someone does it for him #or he’ll stay that way until he gets bored and decides to do them damn dishes #obey me belphegor #obey me belphie #obey me #obey me swd #obey me!#obey me nightbringer #obeyme!#obey me drabble #obey me hcs #obey me crack

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tsukii0002 · 16 days

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Beel: Mc is very angry….

Lucifer: Don't worry, they'll get over it soon.

Beel: How can you be so sure?

Lucifer: *smirk* Because I've enchanted the mayonnaise so they can't open it, they'll ask us for help.

Beel: Ooooh and do you think that-

A sound of glass breaking is heard and they run over there.

Lucifer and Beel: …

Mc: *with the broken glass mayonnaise jar in one hand* …. *staring at them* …

Lucifer: …

Mc: *being a proud bastard almost as much as the avatar of pride* Hum *leaves without saying anything to them*

Beel: I guess we'll have to look for another way…

Lucifer:… Sometimes I forget why they have a pact with me.

.

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temis-de-leon · 2 months

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Based on that one joke from TikTok. My pc is still broken and I can't write anything decent:

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MC: Fuck… I forgot to peel my skin today.

Mammon: What?

MC: My skin, I didn't peel it today.

Asmo: Like a mask?

MC: No, just my skin.

Asmo: Solomon's never done that.

MC: It's just the girls, Solomon doesn't know shit.

Satan: You have to peel it?

MC: Once a month, just after my period.

Asmo: You're molting?

MC: Yeah, sure.

Mammon: And you didn't do it today??!

MC: Don't worry, I can do it tomorrow.

Satan: Nonsense MC, we can help you now.

MC: …no, don't worry… it's kinda taboo for girls anyway…

Asmo: Don't be silly, MC! We'd never judge you!

Satan: And it'll probably take less time if the three of us are helping you.

Mammon: That's right! C’mon MC, let's peel your skin off!

MC: …oh no.

.

Masterlist

#obey me #obey me! shall we date?#om! shall we date #om! swd #obey me mammon #obey me satan #obey me asmodeus #obey me asmo #obey me mc #obey me x reader #obey me x mc #obey me x female reader #obey me crack #obey me shitpost #shitpost #obey me incorrect quotes

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hakirachan · 4 months

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Just a little thought bc I’m depressed and have nothing better to do with my life, and this site is my only way to get even a scrap of serotonin atp (*tiiiny spoiler of NB, near the beginning of the game)

So, we know how the Devildom has all sorts of things that are considered common there, but are new to us, right? (Like the hypnotizing plants*)

Okay well what if it was the opposite? Like, we have something really, REALLY common that we think everyone knows about, but our lil demon babies can’t even imagine something like that.

FOR EXAMPLE!!

*mc going shopping*

Lucifer: Ah, MC, you’re here too. MC: Hey! Uh, can you tell me where to find the corn? I can’t find it. Lucifer: …excuse me, what? MC: The…corn? Lucifer: What do you mean by that? MC: Huh?- MC:*(sudden realization)* MC: YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT CORN IS?! Lucifer: Please keep your voice down… MC: Oh, we gotta fix that!

*-one trip to the human world later…-*

Lucifer: What is this stuff? It’s sweet, but somehow savory at the same time.. MC: It’s corn!

(a big lump with knobs~)

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certifiedlucifersimp · 1 year

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Mephistopheles: *acting rude to MC*

MC : Listen-

Mephistopheles: What?

MC : Acting like a dick won't make yours bigger

(Lucifer is proud of you)

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halffulltubofmintchip · 3 months

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Levi: I'm autism

Mammon: and I'm ADHD

Mammon: and we're the neurodivergent brothers

#shall we date obey me #obey me mammon #obey me game #obey me crack #obey me!#obey me incorrect quotes #obey me #leviathan obey me #obey me leviathan #om! mammon #mammon obey me #mammon om #om! shall we date #om! swd #om! leviathan #shall we date leviathan #leviathan om #source: my friend #the brothers meme

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