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#you cannot tell me that
splatooshy · 3 months
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presenting the totally heterosexual dinner party that definitely isn’t a double date (no, not at all)
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damon: adjusting hand on his lap with a strained expression
elijah: watching damon while resting his head on his hands
klaus: 2cool4skool, sitting there amused by stefan using his cutlery to gesticulate.
stefan: cranky, trying to ignore klaus while staring right at him.
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klaus + stefan sharing a secret smile (+ klaus’ little ‘shh’ motion???? they’re having a silent conversation fr fr)
damon winking at elijah, elijah turning his attention away from whatever the fuck’s going on between their younger brothers.
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klefan, silently gossiping about their older brothers.
stefan (with his eyes): oh my god. are you seeing what i’m seeing right now???????? like fr, tell me they aren’t flirting.
klaus: shhh i know right??? you look good btw :-)
stefan: …
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stefan: no but fr look. you see this too, right?????
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goes from staring gazing at damon (with his chin resting on his hands??????) to pay attention to the conversation
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[stefan’s line btw]
klaus: i am actually not opposed to that suggestion. to be perfectly honest, i would prefer it — in fact, i am imagining it right now.
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damon: wanna know the real reason i undaggered you? 😘💞😈👅🍆💦
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elijah: 🤭 (🫣)
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kstarlitchaotics · 2 years
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You know little sibling things
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whiteshipnightjar · 3 months
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Zoozve, my beloved
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malinaa · 5 months
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if i think about the hunger games in peeta's perspective i WILL start sobbing
#imagine you're a boy who's going to die. you're in love with the girl you've been watching from afar. you know your fate.#you just want to help her‚ but then there's the announcement and she's here in front of you‚ kissing you‚ risking her life for you and you#think‚ i could live and i could love. you think she loves you when she hands you the berries‚ when she puts them in her mouth.#then you both survive and you go back home and nothing is real anymore. you have nothing. no family. no friends. no love. just an empty#house. a drunk for a neighbor. the love of your life walking into somebody else's arms. you think‚ i survived the games. i could survive#this. and you also think‚ i should've bit down on those berries‚ should've felt the juice burst before i died.#and then the third quarter quell announcement rings in your ears and you think‚ she will live and i will die as i should have in the first#place. the girl you love kisses you on the beach and somewhere you heart stirs and your mind revolts and you savor every touch she has ever#given to you‚ in front of the cameras and off. because you are a tribute and you are always being watched and snow's presence looms and#you think‚ i know she cares. but you get taken. you get drugged. you get tortured‚ your mind altered. the girl is a mutt‚ a murderer. she's#everything you despise‚ your mind stirs. your heart revolts. you gain more awareness but cannot distinguish reality from fiction and you#have never known katniss' love. the war ends. you heal. you come home. you plant primrose for her. years down the line‚ you grow in love#more than you thought possible. but some days‚ you cannot tell fiction from reality so you ask the love of your life‚ you love me.#real or not real? and she says‚ real‚ and kisses you.#and you sigh and kiss her back and revel in this. a home. a life. a love.#lit#the hunger games#everlark#otp: real or not real?#katniss everdeen#peeta mellark#text#tais toi lys#thgpost
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puppydoggraham · 2 months
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brightlotusmoon · 3 months
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bagelb0nes · 1 month
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crossing over to the valley
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gammija · 1 month
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the real reason tmagp is on break 'til april 11th is so sam can observe ramadan without being chased by a murderous clown blob
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nikoisme · 13 days
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The constant temptation and promise of everything and nothing in the odyssey. The sirens promise odysseus to know, and the lotus eaters promise him to forget. He could be an immortal, and he could be a beggar. Be known, and be a stranger. He could be alive, and he could be dead. He could be odysseus, and he could be nobody. And the man of many ways tries to be a little bit of everything.
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eightpackdiaz · 21 days
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ruenii · 1 year
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Tim, [pointing his staff at the human traffickers]: YOU ARE OUTGUNNED
Jason, [hyping him up]: WHAT?
Tim: OUTMANNED!
Jason: WHAT?!
Tim: OUTNUMBERED OUTPLANNED
Jason: PAY YOUR FUCKING TAXES!
Tim: PUT YOUR GUNS DOWN ON MY COMMAND
Jason: HAND EM OVER!!
Tim: THIS IS HAMILTON MY RIGHT HAND MAN!
Jason, [getting his guns out]: PWO PWO PWO PWO PWO-
Goons: *shaking* what the FUCK are Batman feeding his partners--
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celestial-artisan · 2 months
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Alastor: Now it's time for some witty back-and-forth banter. You can go first, old pal. Vox: *sobbing* Alastor: Look, I'm not sure where to go with that.
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newts-and-bones · 9 months
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The goofs!
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eloquent-edits · 3 months
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🗡️ “I’m all for platonic intimacy but this…?”
the subtext of romance is really peeking through 🗡️ friends to lovers scenarios
Person A going to person B’s house to watch a movie but getting looped into playing drunk card games with B and their parents
Working out together and A insisting on spotting B and adjusting their form
B playfully poking A in public and promptly getting tackled
B patting A’s cheek only to accidentally linger as they notice how the light catches in A’s eyes (A is DESPERATELY trying to not blush)
“Here’s the garage code.” “… Why am I receiving this information?” “You’re already over here a lot. My parents think it’s better than a key.”
Forced close proximity at a LAN party because there’s not much room at the table (and A’s arm keeps brushing against B’s, messing up their aim, but if anything the space between them decreases as the night goes on)
The “Oh, is B coming too?” to “A kidnapped me to come here and hang out” pipeline
Going from quick and funny head scratches to absentmindedly stroking/detangling their hair while chatting with friends
“Do I smell okay?” “You smell normal.” “Which is…?” “Like lilac and gooseberry.”
A melting into B’s hug after a long and stressful week
B helping A deal with a major headache by rubbing/scratching their back
A heating up B’s ears with their hands because B forgot ear muffs in winter
“My mom thinks you’re really pretty/handsome.” “My mom thinks you look like Adonis/Aphrodite.” “Can you ever take a compliment?”
Candid pictures give away the softness in B’s eyes when they look at A goofing around
B not minding when A gives them a long hug in public, even though they aren’t big on PDA in general
B drawing a shitpost and sending it to A, A setting it as their lockscreen, and months later B realizes that A still hasn’t changed it
B’s family automatically assuming that A might join for any family function and making A’s favorite dish accordingly
“I have to go into the office this week. Can I crash at your place since it’s closer?”
Hanging out for hours —> “I don’t want you to drive home this late.” —> waking up in each other’s arms because they both refused to let the other sleep on the floor/couch
“My clothes reek of you.” “You could’ve just told me to take a shower.”
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lazycranberrydoodles · 9 months
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getting back into the untamed and i had a thought. / follow for more yllz babygirlism
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sp0o0kylights · 9 months
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Part Two / Part Three
Ao3
It's 8:45 am. 
The Red Barn, which is neither red nor a barn, has been open since 7, catering to the early morning crowd with rounds of coffee and pancakes.
It was no Benny's, but given the size of Hawkins and the lack of alternatives?
No one was complaining. 
They were all too happy someone had opened up another watering hole for the working class man (or lass, as Foreman Shelly will dutifully remind you) which meant the place was packed with both day and night shift regulars, passing each other in staggered waves. 
It also meant Wayne was sharing the packed breakfast counter with a warehouse worker by the name of John Cheese on one side and Police Chief Jim Hopper on the other.
He doesn't mind it.
Wayne's a man on a budget thinner than his shoelace, but he's also a man who understands that small indulgences need to be made in life or you didn't truly live it.
This is how he convinces himself to get a coffee at the Barn after work everyday, reading the morning newspaper and chatting with the other regulars before he heads home.
Bonus, it gets him out of the rapid-fire franticness that is his nephew in the mornings.
(All the love in the world wouldn't change the fact that all that Eddie came with a lot of noise. 
The kind of noise that was a tried and true recipe for a headache right after a long shift.)
As a trade off, Wayne went to bed early so he could wake up in time for dinner with Eddie.
 It was a nice little system that worked for them. 
A routine Wayne was reminiscing fondly on, when the pager on Chief Hopper started to chirp. With a sad moan, the man fished out a few crumbled bills and threw them on the counter, abandoning his coffee to trudge out to his truck.
This was not unusual.
Particularly recently, given they were but a scant few weeks past that whole mall ordeal. A fact all too easy to remember when one caught sight of the Chief’s still healing face. 
What was unusual, was when he came storming through the doors a minute later, face now a furious shade of red with his hat clenched in his hand. 
The energy in the room shifted, taking on something a little watchful as Hopper swept his gaze from side to side, like a dog on the hunt.
Judging by the way he stilled when he caught sight of Wayne, the latter assumed he found what he was looking for and could only pray it was the person behind him. 
(He liked John, but Wayne had enough trouble this year and he wasn't looking for any more.) 
"Munson." Hopper called, striding over and dashing all his hopes. There was a choked fury emitting off him, and given the way John audibly scooted his chair away, Wayne knew everyone had clocked it. 
"Chief." Wayne greeted, inclining his head towards him.
Idly he wondered what the hell his nephew had done this time.
'So help me if he stole all the town's lawn flamingos and put them in that damn teachers yard again….'
Wayne didn't even get to finish his threat, the Chief was already next to him. 
"Mind if I have a word outside?" 
Dammit Eddie.
"Ah hell, what's he done now?" Wayne asked with a sigh, eyeing the coffee he had left morosely. 
There was still almost half of it left and the pot had tasted fresh for once. 
"What?" Hopper said, and then Wayne got to watch as the man ran through an entire chain of thoughts, each one punctuated by things like; "Oh," and "No. " 
"This is something else." He finished, flushed and fidgeting, anger making him antsy. 
Wayne stared up at him. 
"Something else?" He repeated, not sure he heard.
"Yes, something else." Hopper snapped impatiently, before leaning forward, voice dropping low. "This doesn't involve your nephew, but we both know you owe me for how many times I've let that kid off, Wayne. That's a damn big favor I've been doing you and I'm calling it in." 
If it were any other cop, it'd sound like a threat.
It was Hopper though. The same Hopper who Wayne had gone to school with.
They'd never been friends exactly, but they had been friendly and remained so. Even now, after Wayne had taken Eddie in, who’d gone on to be an undeniable pain in the local PD’s ass. 
Hopper really did let the kid off easy. 
Wayne really did owe him. 
So he put down his coffee with a sigh, passed his newspaper over to John and stood up, motioning for Hopper to lead the way. Got into the Chief’s truck when he waved him in, and didn’t make a big fuss when Hopper tore out of the parking lot like hell was about to open up under them. 
"Not a lot of the kids involved in the mall fire could be identified, but a few of them were." Hopper started, which felt nonsensical given the utter lack of context. 
Wayne hummed to show he’d heard. 
“Some of them got banged up more than others, and a lot of people wouldn’t be surprised if they didn’t make it.” 
A pause, Hopper white knuckling the steering wheel as he swung the truck hard around a turn. 
“For certain people, those kids dying is the preferred outcome.” 
A mix of fear and warning swopped low in Wayne’s gut. 
"Jim." Wayne said, dropping the use of a last name because if any situation called for it, it was this one. "What exactly are you saying here?" 
The Chief chewed on his split lip. 
"I know you're smart, Munson. I know you, and plenty of others are aware that something's happening, been happening in this town." 
Which was a hell of an understatement if you asked Wayne. Plenty of the upper classes might be able to bury their heads when it came to the military parading about and the flow of “accidents” they brought in their wake, but then, they didn't see all the other signs of trouble. 
The absolute oddity that was Starcourt’s construction. 
How it had been built using primarily outside crews and anyone who'd taken a singular look at the site could tell you they were building it weird. 
Weird as in it looked like it would have a multi-level basement, and not what a mall should have. 
Then there were the constant electrical problems. The backups upon backups that failed. The late night delivery vans headed out to the Hawkins Lab. 
The things in the woods that kept spooking all the deer and the weird markings they left behind that unnerved even the hardest of hunters. 
This didn’t even touch the Russian military that more than one reputable person swore was hanging around. 
The very same Wayne himself had seen, on more than one occasion. 
(And you couldn’t deny it; those boys were military. Past or present, it didn’t matter. They moved like a threat, and Wayne treated them like one, staying well clear.)
"Yeah." Wayne admitted. "I also know better than to stick my nose in it." 
"That makes you a smarter man than me.' Hop complained under his breath, but the anger was self directed. 
"The point is, there are some government types crawling around, doing shit they shouldn't be doing, and more than a few of them are in the business of making people disappear.” 
This was absolutely not where Wayne had thought this was going. 
Hopper took a breath. Than another.
A third.
It was starting to make Wayne nervous, in a way he hadn’t felt since a social worker had brought Eddie to him for the last time and final time. It was the feeling that things were about to shift in a way that would change the course of his life. 
"Steve Harrington is sitting in my office right now, beat to absolute shit.” Hopper admitted.
Wayne gave him the floor to talk, letting him go at his own pace without interruptions. 
“He's there because some of those government types finally figured out his parents are never fucking home.” 
Wayne sucked in a breath. 
"We both know his parents, Wayne. Harassing them to come back and take care of their kid won't work, and frankly, I’m beginning to think all the phone lines are tapped anyway.” He winced here, like voicing such a thing pained him, and Wayne understood.
It sounded a little too out there, a little like he was buying into a conspiracy. 
Except he wasn’t. Wayne knew he wasn’t. 
Jim Hopper might have been an alcoholic, a man living in pain and unconcerned with his own life, but if there was one thing he was solid for, it was shit like this.
He didn’t jump to conclusions. Didn’t believe the first thing people told him. Even at his worst, he did the work to see what was really happening, and made his decisions from there. 
(Even if that decision was to accept the occasional bribe, or drive an intoxicated 13 year old Eddie home instead of hauling his ass into the drunk tank.) 
“Harrington won’t admit it, but he’s got a hell of a concussion if not a full blown brain injury and he’s not reacting as well as he should to Suites trying to run him off the road.” Hopper continued. Angrily, he added, “Damn kid didn’t even come to me until they tried to break into his house last night.” 
His fingers squeezed the wheel so hard Wayne heard the leather creak in protest. 
“I’d take him, but my cabin is being renovated from…” He trailed off, heaving a sigh.
 “A storm, so me and my kid are bunked with the Byers right now and we’re full up.” 
Hawkins hadn't had a storm like that in years, but Wayne wasn't going to call him out on the blatant lie. 
“I need a place to stash him for the next few weeks, until I can work with some of the higher ups sniffing around, and get them to call off their attack dogs.” 
“And you want to stuff him with me.” Wayne finished. 
“I know you don’t have the room.” Hopper admitted easily, stopping his truck at a red light and locking eyes with the other man. “But I also know you’ll be the last place anyone would look for him.” 
'Ain’t that the damn truth.'
“You’re really gonna go this far for a Harrington?” Wayne asked, instead of the million of other questions leaping to the forefront of his mind. 
This one, he figured, was the most important. 
“He’s not his dad.” Hopper said, as firm as Wayne had ever heard him. “He’s not either of his parents, and he saved my little girl.” 
Wayne hadn’t even known Hopper had another little girl, but he also knew better than to ask where the guy had found one. 
It wasn’t his business, just as nothing else Jim was involved in, was his business.
Except, apparently, Steve Harrington. 
“I’m gonna need my own truck if I’m takin' Harrington home.” Wayne said easily, instead of bothering to ask anything else.
If Jim said the kid was different than his daddy, then he was--because when it came to things like that, Jim didn't lie.
No point in it. 
“I know. Just needed to talk to you first, without anyone overhearing.” Jim said, before swinging the police truck around and heading back to the Barn. 
“I’ll stay in contact with you, and I’ll make sure Harrington pays you for the pleasure of your hospitality. Just--” Here Jim cut himself off, looking like he was struggling an awful lot with the next thing he wanted to say. 
Once again, Wayne waited him out.
“Don’t let Steve fool you. He’s good at fooling people, letting them think he’s okay. Too good at it, and between the two of us, I have a real good idea of the reason why.” 
A memory came to Wayne unbidden, of Richard Harrington and Chet Hagan, beating some poor kid in the highschool bathroom bloody. The grins on their faces as the poor guy wailed for them to stop.
How they almost hadn’t. 
“Alright.” Wayne agreed.
Hopper swung back into the Barn's parking lot, and Wayne moved right to his own beat to shit truck, ready to follow Jim back to the police station.
He wasn’t a praying man, not anymore, but Catholisim wasn’t a thing that let you go easy. 
He found himself sending up a quick prayer, fingers flicking in a kind of miniature version of the sign of the cross. 
Considering his own kid’s history with Harrington, and the sheer small space of the trailer? 
Wayne had a feeling it was needed.
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